#my mind is always turning though . . ..
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you always land on all fours
#umineko#umineko spoilers#ikuko hachijo#ikukos turn for a more serious piece... the old man has reigned for too long#now. INCREDIBLY LONG INCOHERENT TAGS RANT INCOMING FAIR WARNING HAS BEEN GIVEN:#it makes me so so sad how little discussion there is about specifically ikuko because imho she fits so neatly into a lot of the more#overarching Big Themes of the game in a way that i have not ever really seen people take notice of or point out in a meaningful way#like even just off of the top of my head. the significance of names and what it means to go by a name that's Not Yours (she has like 4+)#what it Means to be a witch how it represents a person's deepest insecurities and flaws & how its at its core a coping mechanism#the fact that it takes two to create a universe and trying to do it on your own anyways has the capacity to bring you intense misery#^ (how she's shown to be extremely dismissive of her own work and skill until a collaborator comes into her life and helps/encourages her)#and even the family/patriarchy/misogyny stuff that is so prevalent in the rest of the game comes back around to her. even her Only Friend#(young&stupid atp to be fair) remarks that shes Weird for being unmarried + the little she does say about her past invites the question of#to what extent her self-image stems from her family deeming her a freak outcast & effectively disowning her while celebrating her brothers#and i have lot in my mind about the witch thing specifically because i think her particular situation is very reflective of what umineko's#entire magic system and fantasy facet as a whole is meant to represent for an individual. from what little we see of (what is presumably)#her Real personality she is shown to be deeply self conscious in a way that is JARRINGLY diametrically opposed to both 1.) what we see in#featherine and 2.) what we see when she is acting as a Public Figure. because both of the above are very much purposeful acts that she is#putting on in order to obfuscate her true self. and i have always been very resolute & adamant about not totally equating her to featherine#not only because im very firmly in the camp of “featherine is the avatar of the Pen Name & tohya is part of her too” but also very much b/c#i feel very strongly that the stark differences between the two are very centrally relevant to her character & her psyche. as is the case#with most other witches featherine's personality traits serve to reveal/magnify a lot of ikukos inner workings by playing on her#insecurities/reversing them e.g. ikuko being very quick to downplay her skill/achievements becomes featherine being the COMPLETE opposite#to the point where she barely registers even other witches as living beings rather than just fun touys. BUT even though i do champion the#ikuko/featherine separation so hard i ALSO think it is purposefully relevant that at first glance the line between them seems so blurry#her introduction implying a more nebulous separation between her reality/fantasy counterpart is i think is an intentional move on her part#like it is part of the front she is putting up when acting as the Author. as opposed to Ikuko the person who we (in a way ironically very#similar to the way that the Real Battler is presumably only shown during the boatscene) only very briefly get to see take up screentime#which even on a meta level lines up very well with her apparent underlying nature as a like. extremely private largely reserved/shy person#hit tag limit but if by some miracle anyone is still reading this thank you... please see ikuko with the love she deserves... ok ily byeee
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Hi!! Your Cherik is so good and gorgeous 🤩🤩 If you don't mind wanna try to draw some Fall of X Cherik please?
thank you so much !!
i have a couple of ideas relating to the fall of x period specifically since theres. A Lot i wanna play with, so i hope this lil thing may be a satisfactory start :]]
and the obligatory bonus:
#xmen#xmen comics#fall of x#cherik#charles xavier#erik lehnsherr#erik magnus lehnsherr#max eisenhardt#professor x#magneto#snap sketches#for clarity on of this tag ramble im calling magneto max OK ok#sorry it took me a while to answer- ive been busy this week !#but yah like i said theres a lot of Fall Of X moments i wanna poke at#one i really wanted to doodle around was max's time with the shadow king from Resurrection of Magneto#the third issue is prob my fave in general if im so tbh .... but i wont prattle bout that ill go back to my previous prattle#i dont think i have a comic in mind prob just a doodle with shadow charles....#i mean if im devious enough i can def turn it into a comic but for now i just know i wanna do something with that#honestly even this moment i might revisit when i have more time to draw something. a lil better#i dont hate this its a sound start- but i THINK i wanna draw a smooch. a lil kiss. idk we'll see#cause im cheeky like that. 'will this be the last time i see you' 'girl idk we can kiss about it though' etc etc#god not to get off topic but im so curious what will happen with these two ... but thats for a diff post i guess#honestly if you guys have any runs i should read lemme know !! i just finished way of x and bar that ive just been reading the 60s issues#i have a couple on my list i wanna check out but im always excited to look into recs if yall think theyre worth it !!#but ya. thats all from me for now#my time is so finite this week i hope i can draw these sillies again soon .. i have a lot of ideas i fear#maybe i can sneak in one more doodle tonight ... <- doubtful
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Horror's nightmare
Horror doesn't think much on his past anymore, but his nightmares often resurface the guilt he's buried about the idea that he could have prevented it all somehow, even if it came at the cost of his own life.
Thankfully, Nightmare is here to make him a hot drink to calm his nerves and promise him a visit to his brother when the sun is up, because Papyrus will always be very glad to see his brother alive and visiting (and as sleepy as ever).

#UTDR#UTMV#Horror Sans#Nightmare Sans#My Art#Truce au#Bad dreams comic#Just when you thought you were safe from my 50 ongoing art projects I remember to finish another one >:3c#I had a lot of fun with this one! Despite how kind of grim it is#It gave me a chance to play with different brushes and work with colours and such which is cool :D#Anyway yeah Horror likes to think he's at peace with his past#Especially considering who he lives with - he's probably the least haunted of the 4#But there is always a nagging thought in the back of his mind that he is in some way responsible#If not for breaking the core and more or less killing the scientist trying to fix it#(Even though it was at least partly justified since they tried to kill him first)#Then for letting the human go by with lvl in the first place knowing that they would end up killing Asgore in the end#Even if he couldn't have possibly known how bad things would get as a result#Also!! In case you're wondering Monster Kid and the dog are in the start because it's a dream#In his mind he always remembers horrortale before it started falling apart and losing people#And now... (turns my terrible little eyes upon Cross)
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we really don't talk enough about how cesare (who proclaims himself to be honorable) actually has an extreme level of self-absorption and narcissism. they jump out on different situations especially in his vindictive sexual harassment of the women he slept with for wounding his ego. like his abuse of ursula (who was deceived by his chivalrous façade) for leaving him and taking a will of her own vs. his aggressive grabbing of caterina's breast when she taunted him at his sister's wedding (shows that he's still bitter over her rejecting him at forli).
#i'm insane about every aspect of his personality and psychology like i loooove dissecting that side of him#bro could never handle any woman standing up for herself without turning to humiliation and asserting dominance i fear#like neil jordan clearly intended to romanticize him but arnaud's portrayal strives to make him more sinister and layered mwah#mind you cesare's darkness and hypocrisy is all francois' improvisations and we love him for it#the way i'm sooooo turned off by the fandom's persistent narrative of him but then i actually remember how he is and i go like...oh <3#moslty because they have spent over a decade reducing cesare to a flat “hero” by stripping away his most interesting aspects#my preference for juan among the bros is not only bc his story is moving but also bc his characterization feels very authentic and raw#and by that i mean that his misdeeds are as fleshed out as his human side which makes him extra engaging#he also doesn't have a group of fans always yassifying him mostly bc he isn't “conventionally attractive”#even though neil's intention is to make him the unappealing foil to cesare initially#but shit gets real once you cast insanely talented actors with brains like david and francois#caterina sforza#ursula bonadeo#tw abuse#tw sa#the borgias#cesare borgia#tb text post
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at this point, combing through boards to post and going “oh i forgot i referenced that” is also a part of my boarding process
#which is quite funny since i was just thinking about this one. i mean i always am it’s my favorite Chuck Jones short. but i was thinking#about it in a ‘geez i really need to rewatch this’ way.. kept holding off since i wanted to wait until i could review it but life has been#busy. but i was skimming through The Million Dollar Cat and thinking ‘dang i guess My Favorite Duck is a take on the old ‘you cannot harm#this animal or person for this disclosed reason’ genre’ which is obvious but i never really thought to compare it to stuff like Million#Dollar Cat or The Wabbit Who Came to Supper#and now i wanna rewatch it to see how Mike Maltese worked his subversive magic keeping that in mind.#such as the signs turning against Daffy rather than#Porky just getting fed up and ignoring the signs anyway#which is usually how these things go#anyway good cartoon and i am so excited to post the boards for this.. i’m so behind on board posting though#pat
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erin theory time
this one is filling in background holes oooooooo The synopsis of my theory is that I believe his dad somehow forced him into being the elemental magus. His body was built for it, his channels were a bit open either naturally or due to his weak nature it just didn't have a preference (I'm not one hundred percent certain on the ladder though; I'm just basing an assumption- I think its more likely the former.) [AFTERTHOUGHT SUNSET HERE: he could naturally have his channels open and got major elemental corruption which explains being bedridden and also how he's no longer that fragil with the seals and everything now. still not one hundred percent confident but its better than previous.] we know he wasn't always like this due to tess's reaction on falst's comment on 1.15.6
he wasn't always the "great elemental magus" he was a kid before that, and since he had potential. I think someone wanted to push that a bit. ...Only problem is that he is fragile. bedridden fragile. so what do you do when your child is weak but still has potential? guilt them into continuing to push themself anyway because if they cant prove they're worthy they're a burden. they're full of potential. they can be someone incredible; they can help people but if they do not then what are they even fucking doing with their life am I right chat? i think his father pushed him into being the magus but didn't exactly tell him we was worthless...rather that he has potential. that he can be all these great things. and has the opportunity to be someone incredible; someone who's actually skilled and can help people if you just keep pushing. fueling his ego while also implying that if he doesn't do this then he is essentially worthless. its just. that last part is quiet and not really said out loud. ..but he knew. hes just a sick kid unless he pulls his act together and starts doing the magic then you're just a useless fucking bedridden boy. and now that Erin IS the elemental magus hes finally achieved what his goal was. he did it. he is the greatest according to his expectations. he is powerful, he can help people, he's fully capable and useful, he can do e v e r y t h i n g.
..that's what he was told. thats what he was expected to become. so he has too. because If he can't... ...
#sunset speaks#comic aurora#Aurora comic#erin ruunaser#MY COLD TURNED INTO ALLERGIES#IM NOT FUCKING HAPPY#EVERY TIME I TALK OF THIS MAN I AM CURSED#FUCK#still doing it though <3#watch I'm going to change my mind last minute and realize something I got wrong and then be ashamed later just you watch.#and either i'll edit ITIN last minute or reblogan update.#I always remember something the second I post it.#auaguh
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I decided to go through my old warm-up notebooks from my honours english class and in one of the warm-up prompts, I said I wanted my superpower to be "controlling the effects of [my] puberty," and I'm glad to say that I've gotten that superpower. It took a very long time, but that's a superpower I can check off my list
#trans#transgender#lgbt#lgbtq#ftm#mtf#nonbinary#ngl though i felt my very soul wince while reading some of them (including that)#in my old self's defense: i was incredibly dysphoric and had Many Unresolved Issues#i also wasn't really masking in that class and didn't know i should probably not be honest with my notebook#my teacher said that she'd only grade warm-ups we wanted graded and she'd only *potentially* read others 'for fun'#also i always didn't like the 'what superpower would YOU want?' question because. it just annoyed me to know it's impossible to have#(besides the puberty superpower lmao)#as much as i believe in being kind to your past self/selves that doesn't mean i'm not cringing about it 😭#just so long as you don't turn the cringe into self-hatred i suppose#you cannot hate yourself into being better♡♡#WAIT I JUST REMEMBERED THAT IN ONE OF THE WARM-UPS I WROTE ABOUT A LESBIAN ROBOT#NEVER MIND I'M DONE CRINGING#man i should make that into a proper short story like. what a concept
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Hi!
I followed your blog for a bit.
I wanted to ask how do you feel about the overseas show version that they are apparently working on?
Sorry for spelling mistakes I am using a translator.
Hello! 👋 And no worries, your spelling is great. ^^
I think you mean the Amazon live action show that's stuck in development hell? The last update we received on it was on the series' eighth anniversary in 2024 from the yakuneba_staff twitter.
My default stance on live action remakes is they're soulless and uninspired cash grabs more often than not, and I hate the sentiment some people carry about them inherently being superior to animation because they're more "realistic."
With TPN specifically, there's also the issue of the Grace Field children's ages. The 2020 live action movie aged the main cast up.
(@TPNManga Tweet | Archived Article)
I imagine an American production would do this as well, and with those raised ages I feel like they're more inclined to lean into ships and handle them poorly, though that's more of a personal gripe.
Another specific thing with TPN is the popular consensus that the series declined considerably in quality after the escape arc. There hasn't been any word of a sequel movie to the 2020 live action one, and there's no incentive for a studio to make it since they already adapted the most beloved and iconic arc that sells the most. No one's interested in bringing Goldy Pond or the Seven Walls to life, and I doubt they'd be afforded the budget to actually do them justice, so that's probably a blessing.
[Continued in this ask.]
#post is open to people willing to explain why they like live action remakes especially in the modern era#not talking about how it brings more exposure to a work and it potentially being revived/extended or the like#I'm specifically talking about personal enjoyment or excitement over the content produced itself#my mind literally cannot comprehend it. I hear live action anime/cartoon/videogame adaption and I mentally prepare for disappointment#honorable exception mentions to the 0PLA and TL0U adaptions because I hear people say nice things about them#I always joke that they truncated the anime because they could have easily blown their entire animation budget on the Seven Walls alone#imagine how gorgeous the scene of Emma and Ray turning back time could be. we were fucking robbed!!#FSS Asks#FSS Chatter#The Promised Neverland#Yakusoku no Neverland#約束のネバーランド#TPN#YnN#TPNManga#yakuneba_staff#TPN Live Action#Escape Arc#Goldy Pond Battle Arc#Seven Walls Arc#the 2020 live action adaption does have that iconic scene of Ray throwing the chair though so there's that#the scene of Norman and Peter at the end is so fucking cringe though I hate it lkjfsldl#where's the subterfuge why is Norman openly making a defiant stand here to make him seem sooo much cooler it's so infuriating#the promised queueland
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So I stumbled across And Every Winter Turn To Spring and omg it's YOU!! the way my little heart made a happy jump!!! I love your work<3
I NEED TO ASK about that deleted scene from S2 and Mary's Sewing Circle where we learn that Hewlett was quite A CATCH in Setauket- is there a way a lass can watch the clip without buying the DVD? 🫶🏻
Aww, you're too sweet! Thank you so much! It means a lot to hear that you enjoyed AEWTTS even though it's unfinished. <3
I don't think I ever managed to find the clip on YouTube, but someone did post it here on Tumblr (bless them). Lots of Hewlett and Mary cuteness, and then some poor post-capture Hewlett and his very-much-glued-on mustache.
#i DO very much want to finish aewtts eventually but i think at this point i'd want to do heavy editing/rewrite parts before continuing#and i can never scrounge up the spoons for that lol. it's always on my mind though#but i do have some more turn ficlets i've been wanting to finish 👀#asks#thekenobee
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so has anyone talking about this yet, or... cuz it was in that latest news video on the amazing digital circus. and uh... i took a screenshot of it.
#the amazing digital circus#does this mean something? does it mean nothing? does it just look cool? we'll find out eventually... just not today :3#keep in mind i am also very sleepy today specifically#i had to make sure i recorded a show for me mother and there's been. SO MUCH STUFF TODAY. WHAT.#so it has been an exhaustingly exciting day for me in particular#i feel like this might turn out to be a recording of a character's voice opposed to THIS being an actual character#i might be wrong though. i'm always willing to admit i'm wrong#anyway it's too soon to really say anything! so for now let's wait patiently and hang out! :D#also caine was weirdly adorable in that video what the hell#OH MY GOD. AUTOPLAY WAS ON DESPITE ME HAVING A SPECIFIC SONG ON LOOP AND NOW I'M LISTENING TO DIGITAL HALLUCINATION#HELP (joking tone)
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hello! i've been a follower for a little while because of how beautifully you render gonta. i just wanted to thank you for the different ways you portray him- both the beautiful and the messy -and how it's helped me a lot with my emotional state. i don't know if this makes sense, but your art gives off such a sense of calm strength perfect for gonta and i just wanted to say thanks for all the good gonta contents. take care
Thank you so much, for seeing my stuff in such positive way, and also for sharing your thoughts with me - it really cheered me up. I had no clue my art can have such vibe and effect on someone… O<-< You take care, too!
#; - ;#turbo-tsun reply#calm strength huh...#sometimes I thought how my art feels to others#I always try my best with technical stuff and conveying emotion and motion and such but as for the impression it gives off#well I don't think it's something that I could ever guess or see kinda like I cannot see myself from outside at all times#'calm strength' isn't something i'd ever consider given my own rather nervous character haha...#though Gonta really does bring me peace of mind so maybe THAT'S what showing through#I'm really really glad it could've helped you in turn#and now you helped me cheer up too really it was great timing#I actually felt rather bad in past few days but your kind words really brightened my day#the circle of kindness XD#why am I writing in tags adsgjhhdas#I dunno it kind of feels more comfortable and less 'stage frighty'? I still work on being able to talk freely#either way thank you so much again!
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💜 Yara
Thank you very much for the prompt, dear Anon!! <3 I hope you enjoy it!
💜 surprise kiss / impulsive kiss
This fucking Marine would not leave her alone.
“And so there I was, surrounded by forty of the nastiest, ugliest pirates in all of the South Blue! They were pointing their weapons at me, creeping closer and yelling curses far too crude to repeat in front of a lady. Bunch of disgusting savages.” The man took a swig of alcohol, pounding his mug against the counter.
Yara’s teeth gritted, staring down at the bottom of her glass as if it had gold in it. If it wasn’t for this ridiculously overpriced beverage-- some kind of pomegranate-flavoured thing that didn’t taste half as good as it looked on the menu board-- she would’ve been out of this shithole bar ages ago.
It was the first day that the Moby Dick had made shore in almost a month, and she had somehow managed to spend far too long of it stuck next to this loser who had just spent the last hour bragging about his impending promotion to Captain of the 453rd Branch or whatever. The shit-eating smirk on his face told her that women were usually fawning over him by this point, and the fact that she wasn’t apparently meant that she needed a little more persuading.
The Marine leaned closer to her, his breath reeking of cheap liquor. “So you know what I did next?”
“I couldn’t care le--”
“I grabbed hold of the steering wheel and swung the ship around! The bastards were so surprised, they didn’t even have time to grab hold of anything, so they all ended up tumbling into the ocean!!” He roared with laughter. “Can you believe that? See, the thing about pirates is that they’re all so hopelessly stupid.”
“Are they now?” Yara said flatly. She was increasingly tempted to push the edge of her dress back, fully revealing the tattoo that adorned her left leg. The only reason why she hadn’t so far was because she was loath to make the man think she was trying to entice him.
“You better believe it, sweetcheeks.” He winked. “And if you want my opinion, Gold Roger was the stupidest one of all. Some ‘King of the Pirates’ he was. I heard there wasn’t even much of a fight to bring the brute down.” Swallowing another gulp of his beverage, he turned to face her. “Now, enough about me. What’s a pretty little gal like you doing all alone in this part of town?”
“Who said she was alone?” a familiar voice spoke from behind them.
Yara’s heart leapt, a small smile creeping onto her lips as she finally glanced up from her half-empty glass.
Ace flashed the both of them one of his usual cocky grins before draping an arm over Yara’s shoulders. “There you are. I was looking everywhere for you.”
The Marine’s expression soured. He shuffled closer to Yara, his tone dropping. “What do you say we get out of here? A man of my rank can get a room at any hotel you fancy.”
Ace tsked. “Whispering isn’t polite, y’know. And there’s a big problem with your plan.”
“Oh? And what’s that?”
A devilish grin spread across the young pirate’s face. He withdrew his arm and reached forwards, fingers brushing gently under Yara’s jaw as he tilted her chin up ever so slightly. “She’s mine.”
Without a moment’s hesitation, he leaned in, his lips colliding with hers. Yara’s eyes widened, surprised by the sudden burst of affection, but they quickly fluttered shut. Ace’s hands had found her waist, pulling her in closer, the taste of pomegranate lingering between them as he deepened the kiss. Finally, he pulled away with a gentle nip to her bottom lip, leaving her breathless. Keeping one arm wrapped firmly around her midsection, he shot the Marine the most satisfied smirk Yara had ever seen.
The man’s lip curled as he slid off the bar stool and took a step towards Ace, trying to look menacing. “Oh, yeah? Who do you think you--” He stopped, his eyes landing on the ASCE tattoo on Ace’s arm. All the colour instantly drained from his face. “W-Wait a minute… I know you… You’re… You’re Fire Fist!!”
Ace tipped his hat at him. “That I am. Pleasure to meet ya.”
“But… that means…” His gaze slowly shifted over to Yara, finally noticing the tattoo poking out from under the hem of her dress. He gulped. “H-Hellcat Yara… It’s-- It’s the Whitebeard Pirates!!”
“And you say we’re the stupid ones,” Yara said disdainfully, watching as the man’s shaking hand reached for the sword strapped to his belt. “I wouldn’t do that if I were you.”
His hand stilled for a second before grabbing the sword and whipping it out. “I’ll… I’ll capture you both! You have a combined bounty of almost one billion Berry, right?! I’ll be rich-- and a hero!!”
Ace and Yara looked at each other, then back at the quivering Marine. Yara let out a sigh, lifting up her glass.
Thunk!!
Before the man could move, she brought it down over his head. He slumped over, his sword clattering to the ground. The rest of the pomegranate-flavoured beverage splashed from the glass, dripping down his blank face.
“Wow.” Ace looked impressed. “That’s one way to solve it.”
Yara shrugged. “I’ve been wanting to do that for over an hour now. Besides, his flirting game sucked anyways.” She placed the glass down on the bar’s counter, sliding it over to the bartender who had apparently seen enough brawls to be completely unbothered by the situation.
Side by side, the two young pirates left the bar, stepping out onto the sunny street.
Ace’s stomach growled as they walked, making him chuckle. “All that excitement and I’m completely famished. Now whaddaya say I take you out for dinner? My treat.”
She laughed. “You say ‘treat’ as if you haven’t skipped the bill on every single date you’ve ever taken me on.”
“That’s true,” he conceded, grinning sheepishly.
Yara looped her arm around his, twining their fingers together. “I would love dinner. And to spend time with you as long as you’ll have me.”
Ace pretended to ponder it. “Well, if that’s the case, then… How about forever?”
Smiling, she leaned down and pressed a kiss against the crossed-out ‘S’ of his tattoo. “Forever sounds nice.”
tagging: @auxiliarydetective @oneirataxia-girl @daughter-of-melpomene
#oc: bravada yara#my ocs#ship: portada#otp: i'd burn the world for you#portgas d ace x oc#asked and answered#this was SO FUN to write omg and i think it turned out well?#i write so much of angsty marineford ace that i really enjoyed channelling goofy (but also badass) alabasta ace for this#thank you so much for the prompt!! i really appreciate it!!#also for my opla-only friends ace has this gag where he always dines and dashes#and lemme tell you if they leave that out of the live action i'm gonna be PISSED lmao#yara doesn't mind though. it's kinda fun when they're both running for their lives from an angry chef#she also had to steal to survive at one point in her life so she gets not wanting to pay for stuff (and not having money)#you can tell yara has matured because fighting marines used to be On Sight for her#(she really really hates them)#my writing#<- forgot to tag
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pretty sure whoever i keep interacting with in my room purposely got my attention while i had headphones on and my back was turned just so I could fill up the food dish bc my cat was upset it was empty.
#g talks#this happened the other night#never happened before and not since#oscar is a diva and complains the second he sees the bottom#so he was complaining all day#even though he still had food to eat#so i was waiting for him to empty it more before i got him more food#anyway#it was super late and i was at my computer writing#I’ve felt a presence behind me there before and it’s always chill#they hang out for a few minutes and then wander off#I don’t mind#but it felt persistent that night#so much I couldn’t focus and was getting interrupted trying to write#but I kept trying anyway#then I felt a poke at my shoulder#it was really light and not at all forceful like times past#I heard something over my shoulder#still don’t know what#so I finally turned around#my eyes went straight down to the dish#it was EMPTY#like completely empty#I just had a feeling in my gut that’s what it wanted#and it looked like my cat had been complaining while I couldn’t hear him too#my cat can’t reach my shoulder#so there’s that#mine#/mobile#/okay to reblog
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Kenny Loggins, 1978
#whenever i see this photo i always think about one of his songwriting methods while on the road#he said he’d carry a tape recorder with him into a bathroom and just sing/play whatever came into his mind for like 15 minutes#then he’d take the best ideas from that recording and turn them into songs#i don’t remember which interview it was but that particular tidbit always stuck in my head#i just wonder if he was doing that in this photo because he very obviously is in some kind of locker room bathroom or something (faucets)#it mostly likely is just warming up before a show though :0 anyway#always love reading and listening to him talk about how he puts songs together :’))#kenny loggins#my scans
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Sometimes I have an epiphany about something about myself being very not normal when I'm trying to explain all these intricate paths of logic and plans and how I map out every little tidbit of every little thing I'm stressed about or working towards n I see the look on their face and go 'oh okay so this isn't.... How normal people approach things.....'🤔
#i was jusy explaining to maria my 'rough' plan for some future goals/trip stuff and#well a rough plan to me is.... plotted out pretty well and pretty detailed overall#but theres a lot of contingencies so none of it is final pen to paper plans#but i am also like. always thinking. 24/7 brain always on always running a mile a minute with something#i do wish i could just turn it off and chill the fuck out#i only seem to be able to chill out when 1) i have a clear plan and can relax finally or 2) im in love#brain turns off when im in love i guess#well to some extent i do still think a lot but not as much and usually its nice stuff to think about#i do really like to plan though. i love a good plan. detailed... comprehensive.... color coded....#personal stuff#i feel like this is one of the areas i come off crazy intense and i feel bad about it#i dont know how to convey to people like. these plans and this behavior is for ME like#i dont expect other people to adhere to or even really think about my plans to be honest#they are for my own peace of mind#its nice when people want to take part and help with some of it!#its nice if people find the planning useful or helpful :)#but at the end of the day when im planning its mostly for me so i can just turn my brain off later#also yeah its 100% the perfectionism problem#i have to do everything right and perfect and never make mistakes and never let people down#except thats not how anything works lmfao#oh how nice it would be to not be worried about anything ever
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🌹🌹🌹
From the Hornblower genderflu aka this is how Hornblower and Maria can still win :)
"Whatever worries you, I promise—” “Do not presume to tell me about my worries, damn you,” he said, and snatched his hand out of reach. “Now go back to sleep, or you will not get your strength back.”
Thank you anon <33
#area captain suddenly develops attraction to wife after fictional illness turns her into a man; unable to process feelings; more at 10#this fic has so much goddamn gender in it. i've somehow managed to make hornblower/maria t4t#truly unbelievable what you can do if you put your mind to it#writing maria is a challenge but i like her she's fun#still need to get the hang of her better though#perce rambles#percy yells at cecil scott#scribblings & such#(hornblower also gets genderflu'd as does bush we're transing everyone's gender here just to be clear)#(bush is absolutely that post that's like i made this male character a he/him lesbian (nothing about them changes))#(since that post is always about bush in my book)
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