#my solution was using a sleeve to keep it separated from the rest of my books and magazines

[faraway-sunshine]

one of them has glasses :0

Meet Whoever's In My Head #3: Austin Shinsuke

I liked my drawing from the other dump too much, so I just made a copy, isolated him and finished it up.

(Sunday 17th September, 2000, 7:12 AM)

(More under the cut)

Backstory

I don't remember an exact moment where Austin became separate from me, but I know that there was always some part of me that acted a little extra grown-up than the others. And I guess after whatever led me to develop differently, it grew into him.

He's a caretaker, one of two significant ones. A lot about Austin came from traits I found grown-up and impressive, such as height and glasses. Most of the time, he's either in turtlenecks or a loose outfit with the big sleeves that's almost like a choirboy or some other church person. The scarf is also there almost all the time.

Although I think of him as older, it's a childish sense of older, like the things I'd note set Mari and Hero apart from my friends in the same grade. He doesn't actually know much more than me about things.

Austin always excelled in trying to fix my messes. He's very anxious and finds it hard to talk, especially as he largely wanted me to present as normal most of the time (though he was gentle with the rest of us and would tell us that if it hurts us to hide we should find a compromise). When he'd be in control, he'd do things like tidy up, check on my friends if I hadn't talked to them in a while, read, do homework, and ask for help if we needed it (like in math). He's kind of a team with another presence of mine, coming in after the big feelings (like tantrums or panic attacks) or just before them to try and mitigate them. He's also very much involved with engaging with Haru, and is to him a little like Mari was to me.

He was really helpful to me and important, especially when I'd feel helpless or disconnected, but I did find him a little annoying sometimes as he'd start listing everything I could have done to avoid a bad outcome or finding solutions when I just want comfort. But he's comfortable, and nice, and knows when he's gone too far or listens if I can't take it right now.

Austin also really likes puzzles and mystery books, and he's the best gamer. He keeps trying to get the rest of us to start a more private journal to keep myself oriented, though I rarely have blackouts during important times these days (right now Austin is telling me that therapy counts as "important times", hah).

Design

He's grown-up and black and white as the rest of us, but has soft edges. Most other design choices are in the above. His eyes and Haru's are also different from the others as I used to draw them differently and they're the older ones.

His name in English and Japanese is both new. I let him pick a name and he did a bit of reading and came back with it. Though Austin's mostly happy to present as Sunny to help not confuse people.

[idolish7imagines]

Good day! How are you? Can I request? Idolish7 respond to the phrase "don't leave me."

Thanks in advance)

Idolish7 responding to their s/o saying "don't leave me."  

A/N: loved this prompt, thanks for the ask! Sorry if you didn’t want it to be angsty lol but I had fun thinking of the responses in that regard

.::.

Riku Nanase

He tenses up, immediately putting his hands on your shoulders with a worried, almost desperate look in his eye

“Leave you? No, I’d never!”

Riku doesn’t quite know what to say after that, but he’ll say it a thousand more times if it’d get you to believe him.

He tries to think of what Tenn would do in this situation..

“..take a deep breath alright? Whatever it is that’s scaring you, it won’t run me off, I’ll be by your side all the way!”

He wanted you to cheer up right away, but knew that wasn’t realistic, so instead he pulls you into a gentle hug, staying that way until you’re comfortable enough to tell him what’s going on with you. Whatever it is, he’ll be understanding and willing to lend a hand to help.

Mitsuki Izumi

A wave of confusion hits him before any other emotional response to hearing you say that. He raises an eyebrow, looking up to you.

“Eh? Why would you think I was considering leaving you?”

You sniffle, explaining your reasoning, barely able to get it out due to the tears welling up and blocking your vision, not to mention it was pretty hard to explain, especially to his face.

“I’m not gonna leave just because things are difficult right now.” He gives you a small, but slightly confident smile. “I’m stronger than you think, and you are too. Have some faith in us.”

A sigh escapes you, slowly nodding in agreeance. Mitsuki keeps his smiling expression, wiping a tear off your face with his thumb.

“I’ll make you some tea and dinner, and we’ll see what we can do about this, okay?”

Yamato Nikaido

A quiet sound comes out of his throat after you say that. Yamato goes quiet for a moment, before sighing. He chuckles a little in an attempt to take some of the edge off the atmosphere, petting your head.

“Don’t worry big head, I’m not leaving you anytime soon.”

You keep crying despite his effort, making him frown.

“Come on, let’s get some air.” He takes your hand into his, guiding you outside. He’d listen to whatever you need to get off your chest as you two walk together

Nagi Rokuya

His heart drops a little. Seeing his darling sad is the very thing that’s prone to making his mood shatter on the spot. He quickly tries to console you.

“No, no! I’ll never leave you as long as there’s breath in my body, I never want to be separated from you!”

He wraps you in a tight hug (though when he realizes you’re smothered in his shoulder and unable to speak he lets go a little)

“My love, tell me what’s troubling you. I’ll stay with you all night. We can watch anime or do what you’d like.” Nagi wouldn’t let you go for the rest of the night. As long as you were sad and troubled, he was as well.

Tamaki Yotsuba

Tamaki’s brows furrow, walking closer to you, a little closer than necessary.

“Dummy..I won’t leave you. They’d have to take me away kicking and fighting for me to do that.“ He pouts, voice getting softer and more muffled as he talks.

Wiping a tear with your sleeve, you look up at him. “And biting too?” “Yeah.” He smiles, being dead serious about what he said. “Let’s talk over some King Pudding~”

A pretty simple solution, but this was Tamaki’s way of comforting you. Not that it was bad at all.

Sogo Osaka

Similar to Nagi, Sogo immediately gets anxious thinking about whatever prompted you to say such a thing. He gently grabs your arms, trying his best to look into your eyes and not avert his gaze

“What? N-no! Please don’t think I’ll ever leave you...Did I do something to spur this on?”

While Sogo is mulling over the frequent events that might’ve got this reaction out of you, you muster up the courage to tell him what’s wrong (before he drives himself crazy worrying over what it could be)

“Oh..its that huh?” He goes silent for a moment. Honestly, it wasn’t as bad as he expected, but he still felt the need to come up with a solution.

“Okay, I’ll help the best way I can!”

Iori Izumi

His eyes widen, quickly going over the possibilities of why you’d ask that. Was this some kind of test or a joke? No, you looked too genuinely sad and hurt for it to be either of those.

“I’m not leaving you.” He reaffirms.

“...Are you sure?” You ask. He comes over and wipes your tears with a tissue.

“Don’t be silly. There’s no reason for me to leave. Even if there was, I wouldn’t.” He gently caresses your cheek, gazing into your eyes. With such a determined look in his eye, you were sure Iori wasn’t lying.

 “Whatever you’re worrying about, I will take care of it if I’m able to.”

[prideofcelestia]

Congratulations again, now here's my proper ask for the event..

I'm a bi she/her. I'm 5'5 and my mbti type is intj. I'm also a dec sagittarius. I'm someone who values respect and freedom over anything else which sometimes makes me wonder if pride is my sin but when i do explode after trying to keep prim and proper, i fear my anger myself. I'm often compared to a grumpy cat and i also say that I'm an old soul. I have a bad anxiety but my face deceives my emotions and make me appear unapproachable. My love language is acts of service and words of affirmation, but once I'm really comfortable with the other person i get clingy that it almost gives me a separation anxiety. Although I'd step back if that person's happiness is with someone else. For me, the happiness my loved ones matters the most. I haven't dated yet because i also fear the heartache yet i yearn for one lovely connection, a soulmate who'd understand me even if my face remains neutral. On a lighter note, I'm mostly into mature type but if i happen to fall for someone a little childish then i guess it can't be helped. I'll babysit them for the rest of my life as I've been doing for my friends.

I'm really sorry for making this long but my hands couldn't stop typing ;-;

bsjwkk dw buddy! don't be sorry! i enjoyed reading it. ^_^

*drumroll* i match you with

solomon

with a man like solomon who both values and is accustomed to respect owing to his knowledge and freedom due to his immortality and lack of close bonds, reciprocating these for his partner comes naturally. life is a wonderful gift and you bring additional colour and warmth to it. he prioritises your comfort and understands your boundaries because those are a part of you and he loves everything about you. he accepts all of you - the parts that you love and the parts that you feel are your flaws.

with pranks up his sleeves and teasing words at the tip of his tongue, he can be quite trying. when you eventually explode because of his antics and lash out despite not wanting to, he knows how to own up to his mistake. yes, he took it too far if it upset you because that was never the aim. he is sincere in his apologies when your emotions overtake you. if you need him by your side, that is exactly where you will find him. in case the reason of your anger is something else, he is willing to hear your side of the story and offer his opinions. wanting the best for you, he points out when he thinks that you are in the wrong without sugarcoating his words.

he understands that you feel guilty after letting your rage out, and he tries to reduce the negative feelings as best as he can. mentioning some experiences from the past, he tries to make you feel normal about your heartaches. "shhh, my love, i am here for you. don't overthink and put all the blame on yourself. that's unfair. you are not alone. tell me how you feel. i am all ears."

he tries to make you smile and lose any awkwardness you may have. in private, he is extremely sweet and tells you how he enjoys your company even if you two are just hanging out for fun.

"two old souls belong together," is something he often whispers while hugging you tightly.

"my happiness lies in your smile, my grumpy kitten. so, as long as you are with me and love me and let me make you happy, i think i can survive a few more centuries... pleasantly."

he indulges you and finds extreme joy when you act clingy. with a smug smirk, he pats your head, rubs your back and says, "oh? you must be too deeply in love with me to wanna be so close always. haha not that i am complaining, i think it's really cute. i wish the brothers could see us like this. imagining their conflicted expressions is a lot of fun."

he is glad that you adjust so well. he can be mature and mischievous in the same breath, giving quite a logical solution while pissing everybody in the room off with his next words. he sometimes wants to baby you while at other times, he wants to be babied by you. you make him so happy that he wants to bask in your very essence, be it while helping you with your tasks judiciously or being playful by holding you prisoner in his arms. keep looking after him and come to him in your hour of need.

[kitcat-metaverse]

Build Your Own Blossoms

Tropetember Day 4 - Flower Shop

“We’ve put so much effort into this. I don’t get it.”

A taut voice snapped Solstice’s attention away from the game she had been playing. She was so absorbed in it that she didn’t even notice Haruko was sitting right next to her, drumming her paws together.

“Don’t get what?” the black cat asked, saving her progress and turning off the handheld console.

“Nothing is selling,” Haruko explained, gesturing towards the two shelves still full of small plants. “How are we supposed to earn enough for the concert next week?”

Solstice tugged on her sleeve, pondering a solution. “Hm… Well, there are a lot of other flower shops in Meakanu. Maybe we just… Need to stand out a little more?”

“How, though? We can’t afford the tricks I’ve seen everyone else try.” The white fox’s paws missed a beat, so she let them drop to her lap.

“So then we won’t use everyone else’s tricks,” Solstice stated simply.

“I don’t have any other ideas,” Haruko sighed. “I’d play one of my songs for the customers, but dubstep isn’t exactly everyone’s cup of tea.”

“What would you think of putting up some handmade decorations? Or maybe a flower you can’t normally find locally? Or…” Haruko’s roommate trailed off.

“Or…?” she pried, knowing that the cat was probably coming up with some wild, clumsy idea. She could only hope that it’d be a good one.

“Both. Actually, wait here. I’ll be right back.” Solstice sprung to her feet, immediately getting lightheaded and having to reorient herself for a moment. Once she was a little less dizzy, she hurried off — more slowly this time so she didn’t push herself — into the back room.

Behind beaded curtains, she cleared some space on the counter and started gathering various objects lying around in storage. A small pot with some soil still in it, a hot glue gun, and a strange branch with three smaller limbs all made their way to the countertop.

Just this morning, she found that stick on ground by the sidewalk. It was still relatively new and not brittle, so she was sure that it would be ideal. Haruko had teased her for picking up a random branch, but look at it now, useful after all. She buried the singular end firmly into the soil, packing it in around the branch to make sure it was secure.

After heating up the hot glue gun, she opened up the mini fridge in the corner. She told Haruko not to open it, and now her efforts to keep the curious kitsune out paid off. Four clusters of lavender-colored wisteria flowers rested within, still attached to thin green stems and decently preserved. They would probably wither overnight, she thought, but for now she was going to put them on display for the world to see.

Putting forth all her effort to steady her shaky paws, Solstice carefully glued the ends of the stems to the smaller branching limbs of the potted stick. It would take a bit for the glue to cool off and dry, but they still had plenty of time before they had to close up shop, and it’s not like they’d be selling the display “plant”, anyway.

“Hey Haru! C’mere, look what I did!” she called out excitedly. Haruko ducked through the curtains separating the rooms, her eyes widening when she saw the tiny tree.

“Is that an entire sapling??” she exclaimed. “How did you—“

Solstice interrupted her. “It’s not real. I glued the stems to that stick I found, see?” She pointed at the little dots of glue.

“Ohh. Ehehe, sorry. Do you think that’ll work?” the fox smiled awkwardly, rubbing her arm.

“Guess we’ll have to find out.”

That evening, with a little magic to fast-forward the glue’s drying, the two put the handmade sapling on the windowsill. At first, nobody seemed to notice, but eventually an enthusiast passed by, immediately taking interest in how they got ahold of something that didn’t grow on this island. Haruko admitted that it was just a model (much to Solstice’s displeasure, since she had been preparing a thorough explanation), but the petals were real, and that was enough for the visitor to spread the word. By time the sun set and the shop closed, the shelves were empty. They sold every last flower they had.

—————

Did this little story for @tropetember ^^

The general idea was “What if the shop was a side hustle and they were working on it together?” and then I kind of just went from there. I’m still pretty new to writing, and this is my first time sharing a short story, so I apologize for any mistakes!

The ending was a little rushed due to me being short on time, but hopefully the next one will be better.

[tipsycad147]

Tarot Spreads for Beginners

So you got into the wondrous and insightful world of Tarot. You have your deck, you know the meanings…but now what? Now comes the fun part: reading! As a cartomancer, I can assure you that studying the definition of each card and knowing them by heart is not enough if you don’t actually make use of the cards. What will guarantee that you’ll become more acquainted with this art is none other than practice. So far, you’ve learned to read the cards individually, isolated, but now it’s time to put those meanings in context. How do you do that? Keep reading to find out!

Before I start, I wanted to give a bit of a disclaimer. Memorizing the meanings of all 78 cards is not mandatory. It’s great that you want to educate yourself, but don’t forget that you have an ace up your sleeve: your intuition. And let me tell you a secret: it is much better if you follow your gut rather than your brain. If you want to know more about intuitive Tarot reading don’t miss our blog post!

Reading Tarot in context

There are two elements that will provide you with a frame in which you have to interpret the cards. On the one hand, there’s a question, and on the other, the cards. What does that mean? Let’s say the querent (the person asking a question) wants to know about their love life. They ask “what do I have to do in order to gain the confidence to ask my crush out on a date?”. Imagine you pull out three cards —The Strength, The Hierophant (inverted), and the ten of cups—, it’s important that you interpret them altogether and that you “adapt” the message to the question at hand. These three cards tell us that this person needs to be persistent and brave, not lose hope, and work hard on tearing down negative self-talk and emotional and spiritual conventions that are restrictive in order to get their beloved’s attention, which the ten of cups foresees.

Reading each card as if it were separated from the rest would be inaccurate, as the meanings tend to be slightly modified depending on the cards that are around, as would be not answering what the consultant asked. For instance, (same question as before) you tell the querent “I see that you need to be strong and persistent, good results are guaranteed; then you have to reassess your spirituality, reflect upon your convictions; and lastly, you’ll have a beautiful happy family.” Even though it’s somehow related to the question, it still doesn’t answer it per se. It’s as if somebody asked “what’s your favorite music genre?” and you replied “I listen to pop, jazz, and metal quite frequently.”

What’s a tarot spread?

A spread is an arrangement of the cards that encompasses a set of questions regarding a theme and different positions in which the cards will be displayed. Some advanced readers may even take into account the number of the positions, as numerology can provide further information.

As for themes, you can find spreads for almost every single topic: finding love, finding a solution to a problem, communicating with spirits, finances, etc. Once you’re more acquainted with Tarot, you can come up with your own! They can be as simple or as complex as you want. The more extensive the layout is, the more information you’ll receive. In this post, you’ll find some easy, beginner-friendly ones.

One-card pull tarot

This is where beginners should start, ideally. You can pull one card from your deck every day to practice intuitive Tarot reading. 

Step 1: Take 5-10 minutes to ground and calm your mind. You can also pray to your spirit team to guide you through the reading.

Step 2: Shuffle the cards as many times as you want, you decide when to stop.

Step 3: When you’re ready, pick one card —or let it fly out of the deck, as you prefer— and place it facing up.

Step 4: Observe the card and take in its imagery. Focus and let your intuition guide you. What does the background look like? Is it sunny or rainy? What colors do you see? What do they symbolize or evoke? What’s the character in the picture? What energy do you get from the card? All these questions combined should give you enough information to interpret Tarot.

Some cartomancers may use one-card pulls to answer yes/no questions. I don’t personally use Tarot for these particular questions, for the cards provide much more nuances than just black and white. It’s not as simple as having an upright card as “yes” and an inverted one as “no.” There are some cards that are neutral, such as Justice, or answer in a “yes, but…” or “no, but…” way. Alternatively, my yes/no question go-to divination tool is a pendulum. (Leave a comment if you want to learn about divination with pendulums!)

Three-card spreads

These are my favorite type of spreads, even as an advanced Tarot reader. They are simple and provide you with enough information to work with. Ultimately, short spreads are easier for beginners, as they don’t require a broad and complicated analysis. 

Pick a layout and shuffle the cards. Ask the question either out loud or in your mind (extra tip: including the name of the querent in the question can help you direct the energy toward them), and once you’re done shuffling, pull out the cards one by one and place them where the spread indicates. Now, I’ll give you some ideas for three-card spreads.

Card 1  

Past, Situation, Your Goals, Your Finances, Embrace

Card 2  

Present, Obstacles/Fear, Someone Else, Course of Action, Work through

Card 3

Future, Outcome, Relationship, Advice/Warning, Let go

Needless to say, you can modify these layouts and add or take out cards. For example, you can make the fear and obstacle two separate questions. That way you have more context to read from. The more cards a spread has, the more accurate and elaborated it will be. 

Something I do occasionally in these types of spreads is do a numeric reduction. That is, I add each digit until I get a final number that is below or equal to 22. Then I grab a Major Arcana card that corresponds to the number I got (if it’s already in the spread, I take it as a sign that I should pay extra attention to it). This extra card brings more insight into the reading and works as additional advice. 

Interview your deck spread

This one’s for both beginner and advanced readers. If you ever wonder why cartomancers usually have more than one deck, it’s because they all have different personalities and limitations, like people. This six-card spread will help you bond with your new deck and understand how to work properly with it.

Card 1  Your essence

Card 2  Your strengths

Card 3 Your limitations

Card 4  What you’ll teach me

Card 5 How I can collaborate with you

Card 6 The outcome of our relationship

Extra tip

If you are indecisive about which spread to use, you can simply ask a question and pull as many cards as you feel comfortable reading. You may have certain rules when it comes to your practice. For example, in my case, if a card falls from the deck facing up, I take that as a sign that I should read it, but if more than three fall out, I don’t take them into account, regardless of their position —unless my gut tells me otherwise.

Ask —or suggest your client to ask— questions that need elaboration. Remember that messages from Tarot are like short stories. So, avoid questions like “will I…?”, “when is…?”, “did I…?” Instead, formulate questions along the lines of “what should I…?”, “what’s the best way to….?”, “how can I…?”, “what do I need to…in order to…?”, etc. 

Now you know how to get started in your Tarot practice. As you gain experience, you’ll also gain confidence and will be able to read longer and more complex spreads. This is just the beginning in the wonderful world of divination. So buckle up and don’t forget that practice makes perfect!

[benevolentpeach]

Brat. (SOJotaroXF!Reader)

PLEASE BE ADVISED⚠️‼️: This story contains a relationship between Teacher and Student, SLIGHT NSFW, more like Lime honestly 🤷

WARNING:⚠️⚠️‼️‼️: Brat taming Jotaro, Daddy Kink, Reader is a huge brat, slight NSFW(Lime), Pet names, Jotaro calls reader a bitch, Degradation and Praise if you squint, Smoking, Getting high, Spanking

----------

You were bored.

That was the only thing you could come up with when you signed up for college classes.

You signed up for a class that you didn't really have any interest being in, but it was better than the other choices you had, so here you were...

In Marine Biology, with a professor that had a serious attitude problem.

*

"Did you finish the assignment my old man gave us last night? I got so drunk last night, so I didn't get shit done." Your friend Jolyne groaned.

You and her had been good friends for awhile, and she just so happened to be the Professors daughter, which you thought would've been an advantage, untillll.. You found out that she was as much of a delinquent as you were.

After you'd found that out you'd considered dropping her as a friend, but for some reason, you decided against it.

You two were like two peas in a pod, always getting into some sort of trouble that the Professor would have to drag you BOTH out of.

Now, the Professor wasn't a big fan of you, he thought you were a bad influence for his daughter, and tried his best to keep the two of you separated, but gave up when Jolyne insisted she'd get better if he allowed her to stay friends with you.

You two had cooked up a plan to help her put on a fake facade to try and convince him that she was getting better.

You did the homework and assignments(Although you hated doing any work at all) let her copy off of it, and in return, she'd supply you with some good ole Mary Jane.

A smile crept to your face as you wiggled the completed packet in front of her face. "Got it all right here, everything should be right."

"Damn! You're always on top of this Y/N, and here I thought you were beginning to turn into miss goody-two-shoes." She snatched the packet from your hands and got to work on her own.

"You kidding me? Like I'd ever pass up on the opportunity to get some of the good stuff from you JoJo, you know how much of a stoner I am." You laughed in return, leaning back in your chair.

You were indeed, a stoner, and Jolyne had always been your smoking buddy, unless she found herself busy with her girlfriend Ermes, in cases like that, you smoked alone, savoring the feeling of being high on cloud 9.

A small chuckle came from Jolyne's mouth as she continued to copy your answers down onto her own packet of work. "Speaking of, Ermes said that we won't be able to smoke at her place tonight, and I know your landlord is a piece of shit, so the only option we have is to smoke at my place."

A low groan escaped your mouth after hearing this. "What are we gonna do about your old man? It's not like we can smoke without him finding out." You complained, resting your head on the palm of your hand.

A small smile crept its way onto your friends face, one that told you she held an ace up her sleeve, making you lean forward with interest.

"He won't know a thing. Ermes has a buddy that sells her some THC cartridges, we use this little pen right here and he'll never suspect a thing, I mean.. Excluding the fact that our eyes will be red as fuck, which I've also got a solution for." She sneakily showed off the vape pen and small bottle of eye drops, before quickly stuffing them back into the crevice of her chest.

"You've got a solution for everything don't you JoJo, this is why we're friends. What would I do without you?" You smirked, patting her back lightly.

"You wouldn't have a smoking buddy that's for sure, Ermes and I are the only friends you have."

"Yeah yeah, don't even make me think about being a lonely stoner, I'm okay smoking by myself occasionally, but if I gotta do it every time, man.."

"Ahem."

You looked up slowly, finding Professor Kujo, towering over you with his lips pressed into a thin line, eyebrows furrowed. He didn't look to happy to say the least.

"I'm sorry Mr.Kujo, I was just reviewing answers with Jolyne, she got stuck on some of the questions so I've been trying to help her out." You tilted your head to the side, putting on a fake smile so he wouldn't suspect anything.

Jolyne looked up from her packet and nodded in agreement, showing him the completed first few pages.

He didn't seem interested in acknowledging her work, he just bore holes into you, an awkward silence now engulfing the three of you.

In the back of your mind, you began to wonder if he saw past your little white lie, but when he took a step back and sighed, you knew he'd taken the bait.

"I'd appreciate it if you didn't talk so loudly when I'm in the middle of a lecture. Keep your voices down or I'm kicking you both out for the remainder of the period." He announced, before walking back to the front of the room.

Once he'd returned to his lecture, you leaned towards Jolyne and muttered, "What crawled up his ass and died?" Before you both silently giggled.

When you faced the front of the room, you realized he had been staring directly at you while he continued his lecture, causing you to shift uncomfortably in your seat. If you weren't careful, you'd be kicked out of his class for good..

***

You had finally managed to make it to Jolyne's house after purchasing a multitude of things for the two of you to snack on for the night. You had your nightgown tucked under your right arm, your bag of necessities tucked under your left, and the bag of snacks in your left hand.

Ringing the doorbell, you expected her to answer, but were instead surprised to see your Professor in the doorway, dawning a short sleeve shirt and some black sweatpants.

He rolled his eyes and moved out of the way, allowing you to walk inside, before he shut the door and walked past you into the living room.

You hadn't been to JoJo's in so long, so you didn't really remember where everything was.

Cursing under your breath, you walked into the living room where her dad was, seated in an armchair with a book in his hands.

He hadn't even noticed you were standing there like an idiot. Either that or he simply didn't care.

"What do you want." His cold voice demanded, eyes still skimming through his book.

"Well I was just wondering where Jolynes room was. It's been awhile since I've come over and-"

"Upstairs, third room on the right, now get out of my sight, you're annoying."

Anger began to well up inside of you, you weren't one to take too kindly to others talking towards you like this, so instead of thanking him, you mumbled a "Fucking asshole" under your breath, loud enough to where he could hear, before disappearing from his sight finally.

Trudging up the stairs of the home, your mind raced, 'Why does he hate me so much?' 'What did I do to make him so mad at me?'. It wasn't like you had done really bad things, you and Jolyne only got into some minor trouble, nothing too big.

Sighing deeply you made your way to Jolynes room, knocking on her door gently before letting yourself in.

"What took you so long?" Jolyne mused, her eyes following you as you walked to the other side of her room slowly.

"I forgot where everything was since I haven't come over in awhile, had to ask your asshole dad to tell me where your room was. Called me annoying and told me to go away." I grabbed the vape pen from Jolyne, taking a long drag off of it before passing it back.

You let the vapor sit in the back of your throat for a little, before exhaling and watching the small cloud swirl in the air.

"He's always been like that. He means nothing by it I'm sure, that's just how he's always talked to women." Jolyne snickered, leaning against the wall.

Rolling your eyes, you took a seat on the floor and dumped the bag of goodies out, sifting through it to find what you wanted. "Bet he's a real hoot with the ladies." You joked, throwing a bag of gummy worms her way.

"I swear, sometimes I feel like he's gay because he hates women that much, but if I'm here, I'd say he's probably just very picky." She joked back, digging her hand through the bag of gummy worms.

"Hey, there's nothing wrong with being gay, I mean you've been dating Ermes since before you and I met, so that's saying something." You took a bite out of your nerd rope and smiled.

A short laugh was shared between the two of you, before it got silent again. For a few minutes it was nothing but the sounds of plastic packaging crinkling while you two dug for your snacks, but the silence was soon interrupted by two soft knocks on JoJo's door.

Jolyne was quick to hide the vape pen, squirting some eye drops into her eyes before groaning softly. "What do you want old man?"

"Dinner's done. Is the bitch staying to eat?" His cold gruff voice questioned from behind the door.

The nerve of this man..

You got up and opened the door, you had some words for this prick.

"First of all, I'm not a bitch and I will not sit here and be called these names when I have done NOTHING to you. Second of all, I thought it was pretty evident Jolyne and I were having a sleepover, did you not SEE my stuff?" You bored angry holes into his stupid face, but his expression stayed flat.

You could've sworn you saw a small smirk on his face as he turned around to leave, but with his back now facing you, you came to the conclusion that you had just imagined it.

"Come down to eat, I need to have a talk with the both of you." And with that, he disappeared back down the stairs, leaving you in the doorway, and Jolyne gawking at you for standing up to her dad.

You wanted to scream.

You wanted to punch him so hard.

You'd never seen him smile, let alone smirk at you, he didn't approve of you being his daughters friend and he made that very clear by the way he was treating you.

You grabbed the vape pen from your gawking friends hands and took a long drag from it, muttering under your breath as you exhaled.

"What? You know I don't let people talk to me like that, just because he's our Professor, AND he's your dad, doesn't mean I'm gonna sit here and let him disrespect me like that, fuck that."

"No no, I'm not mad at you, I'm just surprised you actually did it, no one's ever talked back to him like that besides me as far as I know, let's hope he doesn't get pissed off enough to kick you out for the night." JoJo laughed, grabbing the vape pen and stashing it away in her secret hiding hole in the wall.

Rolling your eyes the two of you ventured downstairs into the kitchen, where Mr.Kujo was finishing up the extra plate of Katsudon for his extra guest.

You took a seat next to JoJo, avoiding her dad on purpose. He pissed you off, and being the petty person you were..

You were gonna make sure this dinner was a living nightmare for him.

"Jolyne." He spoke sternly, grabbing her attention quickly.

"What's up old man, did I piss you off?" She responded nonchalantly.

A small chuckle left your mouth as you picked up your fork and began to dig in, unaware that he was now glaring at you from his spot.

"What's so funny bitch?"

Jolyne shifted in her chair, knowing full well that shit was about to go down.

You bit the inside of your cheek, setting your fork down quietly as you came up with a wonderful comeback.

"Oh nothing, just think it's funny how your attitude sucks more than dogshit, bet the ladies love you." You smiled sweetly, but there was no halo over your head, no, even Jolyne knew you were the spawn of Satan in situations such as these, and your pettiness knew no bounds.

Your friend stayed silent, poking at her Katsudon.

Before anything else could be said, Jolynes phone began to ring, grabbing our attention.

She answered, mouthing to you that it was Ermes, before letting out a quiet, "Yo, what's up babe."

You could hear Ermes on the other end, she sounded scared, terrified even, so much so that Jolyne had to hold the phone away from her ear while telling her to calm down because she couldn't understand anything she was saying.

"Yeah, I'll be there. Just calm down and wait for me outside alright?" Now Jolyne was the one to sound scared, but she managed to stay calm.

After she'd hung up, she passed her Katsudon to her dad and made her way over to you, whispering into your ear that Ermes' close friend was in the hospital.

"I should be back by midnight, if you want Y/N, you can leave." You could tell she felt bad by the way her eyes fell, but you merely smiled and patted her on the back.

"I'll just wait for you to get back, it'll only be two hours so I can wait it out. Go support your girl."

"Jolyne. If you aren't back by midnight, I'm coming to look for you." The asshole finally spoke, not even bothering to look up at her. He was busy poking at his food like a child.

Jolyne rolled her eyes and groaned, opening her mouth to protest, before you cut in.

"I think she's pretty capable of taking care of herself, she's an adult, if she wants to stay out then she can, you may be her dad, but she doesn't need you breathing down her neck like a lost mutt."

He finally looked up from his plate, a look of pure rage adorning his face, and it was at this moment that you were able to take in his features.

His eyes were a bright aquamarine color, with small wrinkles surrounding them. His jaw was clenched tightly, and the way he was looking at you..

Excited you..

"Alright I'm gonna head out. Please don't kill each other while I'm gone. I don't feel like coming home to a crime scene." Your friend sighed, slipping past the entrance of the kitchen.

You were too busy keeping eye contact with Mr.Kujo to even tell her bye and to be safe.

Once you'd both heard the door open and slam shut, you smiled.

"Is there a problem Mr.Kujo?" Your voice was sickly sweet for someone who had just told him how to take care of his child, which just pissed him off even more.

He finally lowered his gaze, ignoring you completely as he began to eat.

Nothing else was said between the two of you for the remainder of dinner. Once you were done with your food, you tossed the dishes in the sink and made your way back up to Jolynes room, closing the door behind you.

"Who does that prick think he is? I mean honestly. What makes him think I'm just gonna bow down to him because he's my Professor? God what an absolute dick." You complained, grabbing your nightgown and bag of necessities.

As you began to undress, you could hear heavy footsteps in the hallway, figuring that the old man was finally heading to bed.

Good. Now you don't have to worry about him catching you smoking.

Once fully undressed, you grabbed your lotion, rubbing some on your arms and legs, before slipping into your nightgown.

You brushed your teeth and let your hair down, running a hand through it quickly before rushing out of the bathroom, back into the room.

You grabbed the vape pen from the hiding spot, grabbed a few blankets and a pillow, then proceeded to make a small comfortable nest for yourself, before plopping down in the middle, with your nerd rope and pen in hand.

Taking a much needed drag off of the vape pen, you leaned back and blew the vapor into the air, running your hand through it as if you were trying to catch it.

You hadn't even realized that you'd completely forgotten to lock Jolynes door, so when you opened your eyes after a few hits, you nearly jumped out of your skin when you saw your Professor standing in the doorway with an enraged look on his face. He'd just caught you.

Fuck.

"What the fuck do you think you're doing you annoying brat!" He shouted, rushing over to you.

Before you could respond, he'd snatched the vape pen away from you, inspecting it carefully.

"I-"

"Shut up bitch. As if you couldn't get anymore annoying you damn brat." He snapped, yanking you up by the wrist.

You had to admit, it did hurt a lot when he did that, but not a sound left your body. You were still shocked he'd caught you.

Without another word, he dragged you out of Jolynes room, and down the hallway, into a room you weren't familiar with. From the looks of it, it was his study, or office room, with papers scattered on his desk. You'd thought he would be a neat freak, he was always so well put together at school. Maybe he had a rough day...

"You're high aren't you."

You kept your mouth shut.

"Answer the damn question!"

Now he was starting to piss you off. Instead of being scared, you were angry that he was yelling at you like you were his kid, like you weren't an adult that was legally allowed to smoke pot.

"So what if I am? I'm of legal age. It's not hurting you either so I don't see the issue." A confident smile made its way to your face as you finally looked up at him.

He didn't seem to like your answer, because within the span of mere seconds, you found yourself pinned to the wall between him, with no escape.

"That mouth of yours is gonna get you into some real shit one day, if I were you, I'd stop talking that way to your superior. Right. Now." He enunciated the last two words with a deep gravelly voice that made you shiver slightly.

Now if you had been smart, you would've obediently done as you were told, but instead of listening, you took it as a challenge.

"I don't think I will. There's absolutely nothing you could do about it anyways.. And stop treating me like a child, you're not my father." You retorted.

A guttural growl escaped past his lips at your attitude, and before you knew it, you were spun around and over his knee within seconds.

"What the fuck are you doing?!" Now you were scared.

"Since you want to keep using that dirty fucking mouth of yours towards me." He paused and began to lift your nightgown up, revealing your lacey panties. When the cold air touched your ass, you hissed quietly and began to struggle.

"Quit moving or it's gonna hurt a hell of a lot more you damn brat."

What did he mean by it was gonna hurt?

What was he gonna do???

Suddenly, a sharp pain landed on your behind, as a slap filled the air. A small cry emitted from your mouth at the stinging sensation and you kicked your legs to try and make him let you go.

Suddenly, a fist made its way into your hair, and you found yourself being yanked up to meet his gaze.

He was angry.. But there was something else in his eyes that you'd never seen before..

Lust.

"This is your punishment. Since you wanna act like a smartass little brat, you're gonna sit here and take this. After each slap I want you to count. If you don't count, it'll be harder, do you understand me."

You were too surprised to answer, and the way he was manhandling you, turned you on more than you would've liked to admit.

He yanked you closer to his face, causing you to wince slightly.

"I said. Do you UNDERSTAND me." His voice was lower and huskier than before, making you audibly whimper.

Nodding your head weakly, you half expected him to throw you back down and return to punishing you, but he seemed unsatisfied with your nod.

He wanted to HEAR you say it.

"Use your words. I'm sure you know how to since you like mouthing off to me like a little bitch." He growled, yanking you even closer.

You could feel his breath on your lips, and you so badly wanted to lean forward and kiss him, even though you knew just how WRONG this was, you couldn't help the fact that you were severely turned on now.

"Yes Sir.." You finally managed to answer with a pleased sigh.

He still didn't release you.

"That's not my name." He practically whispered, his eyes glazing over with more lust as he saw the mess he was making of you.

Heat pooled between your thighs and you shifted a little on his lap to help relieve yourself if only a little, but were met with a harsh slap and a tight grip on your meaty thighs, releasing a small moan from your mouth.

"Come on baby girl, say my name." He pressed, rubbing your behind softly.

The heat between your thighs worsened, you just wanted him to touch you already.. But you had no idea what name he wanted you to call him.

Finally, an idea popped into your head.

You hoped that it was right..

"Yes.."

"Daddy~"

You whimpered slightly in the end, but you tried your best to sound cute so he'd at least ease off of you a little if that still wasn't the right answer.

When you opened your eyes, you could see the small yet prominent blush adorning his cheeks, maybe that wasn't the right answer.. Suddenly you'd lost all confidence and sulked slightly.

"Good fucking girl." He finally cooed, closing the space between the two of you quickly.

His lips tasted sweet as he kissed you harshly. His hand went to squeeze your ass, the motion surprising you. When you opened your mouth he took that opportunity to force his tongue down your throat, invading your mouth in all the right ways.

You never thought you'd be here, hell.. You never thought he'd be doing this with you, yet here he was, ravaging you while you sat there and took it.

A whine escaped your mouth when he pulled away, a thin line of saliva the only thing between the two of you.

"You're actually enjoying this? What a dirty little whore." He laughed, shoving your head back down over his other knee.

Usually you'd find the name insulting, but in this moment, you were too turned on to give a fuck, so you took it as a compliment.

A harsh slap met your ass yet again, and you had to bite your lip to keep quiet. You weren't gonna give him the satisfaction of making any noises for him.

"O-one." You whimpered.

Another slap sounded, much harsher than the last, you knew there would be a bruise later.

"Two." You whispered.

"Sorry I couldn't hear you slut, what was that?" He questioned threateningly.

When you didn't answer, he slowly began to rub the space between your thighs, getting awfully close to your clothed heat. But each time you thought he'd touch you, he'd retract his hand and return to rubbing your thighs.

"TWO!" You finally shouted, tears pricking the corners of your eyes.

"Atta girl, such a good little slut for me." He praised, moving his hand back up to your ass.

At about 15, you began to whine and whimper beneath him, practically drooling at the treatment you were receiving.

"I think you've had enough. Do you?" He asked, rubbing your stinging cheek softly.

You weakly nodded, a small whine escaping your lips.

"Words Princess. Can't give you what you want unless you tell me." He snapped softly.

"Yes Daddy.. No more.. Please." You whimpered, legs trembling slightly.

He tapped your thigh, signaling that you could get off of him, but as soon as you began to get up, you almost fell back down, he definitely didn't go easy on you.

He caught you and stood you up straight before sitting back down in his office chair, and you couldn't help but look down at the tent in his pants. You bit your lower lip and wiggled your hips slightly, hoping that he'd let you help him out with his problem, but you were about to be disappointed.

"Strip." He commanded, grabbing your attention.

"Wh-"

"Are you deaf woman? I said strip." He snapped, his eyes flitting up to meet yours for a split second.

All that confidence and pettiness you felt was long gone at this point, so you hesitated to do as told.

"Come on baby girl, let Daddy see that perfect body of yours." He cooed softly, giving your thigh a soft squeeze.

The heat between your thighs grew hearing him call you that, so you finally reached up and grabbed the straps of your silky nightgown, removing them from your shoulders and letting the garment flow to the ground at your feet.

You were quick to cover your chest though, the voice in your head was now screaming at you that this was more than wrong, you were engaging in sexual activities with your best friends dad, not only that but he was your Professor.

He could get in trouble.

He's your Professor..

Which makes this all the more exciting, you finally admitted to yourself.

"Don't fucking tease me, what happened to all that cockiness from before brat?" He snapped, releasing you from your thoughts. You slowly removed your arms from your chest, your tits bouncing lightly as they were freed from your hold.

"Good girl~" He drawled, leaning forward to cup one of your breasts in his large hand. "So soft and beautiful." He muttered, like he was in a daze.

He smirked and rolled your nipple in between his thumb and index finger, before softly flicking it, to which you whined pathetically.

"So fucking pathetic really. Look at you practically drooling over the fact that you're about to potentially fuck your best friends dad. Not to mention I'm your Professor.. What a dirty little freak you are." He laughed harshly.

His words only turned you on even more, and at this point, you didn't care that this was wrong anymore, you hadn't been fucked by anyone for awhile, you missed the feeling.

He tugged you towards him by the hem of your panties, stopping you directly in between his legs, before gently removing them.

"So fucking beautiful, God I could just bend you over and fuck you right now if I wanted to, but this is supposed to be a punishment, you aren't getting what you want tonight Princess, but Daddy's sure as fuck getting what he wants. I don't want to hear a peep out of you unless I give you permission, is that understood?"

You were more than disappointed that you weren't getting what you wanted, but you were still eager to please, so you whined, "Yes Daddy.." Before being forced down onto your knees.

"We gotta make this quick, Jolyne should be back soon." He groaned, unzipping his pants and tugging them down slightly.

When he tugged his boxers down, your eyes widened as his cock sprang back, hitting his chest with a light tap.

"Fuck, I wanna record this so I'll have something to occupy myself with when you aren't here." He openly admitted, reaching for his phone that had been placed on his desk.

When he'd gotten the camera open, he pressed record and commanded you to suck.

You eagerly stuffed the tip of his cock in your mouth, hollowing your cheeks as you did so, all while looking up at him with the prettiest doe eyes.

"Fuckkk, look at you giving me those fucking innocent little eyes while you suck Daddy's cock, such a dirty fucking whore." He cursed, throwing his head back in ecstasy.

You were wetter than you'd ever been before in all honesty.

The fact that this was sneaky and wrong, along with him praising and degrading you in the same sentence didn't help at all.

You took more of him into your mouth, bobbing your head up and down slowly, making him curse under his breath sharply. You loved that he was so vocal, it got you off without you even touching yourself, which you were more than happy with.

"Fuck!" He yelled, before grabbing your head with one hand and forcing you to deep throat him.

You gagged slightly and moaned, the vibrations against his dick making him growl animalistically.

You looked up at the phone, to see that he still had a firm grip on it, keeping it steady while he fucked your pretty little mouth like the whore you were.

"Such a dirty little bitch, look at you taking my cock like a good little slut, fuck, you're mine you got that? Daddy's little fucking fleshlight.. Fuck Princess your mouth feels so fucking good on my cock." He moaned, setting a harsh pace.

Tears left your eyes as he practically gagged you, you were having a hard time breathing through your nose, but you so badly wanted to let him cum, so you mustered up the strength to keep going.

He noticed the tears leaking from your eyes, but instead of slowing down, he sped up, muttering curses and praises under his breath as he fucked your mouth.

"God you look so pretty when you cry, fuck, gonna make Daddy cum if you keep looking at me like that." He groaned, admiring your face like you were a goddess.

You didn't know how he was able to keep the phone so steady with the pace with which he was fucking your mouth at, he had to be really fucking strong, you moaned at the thought of him picking you up and just fucking you roughly, and for a moment your eyes fluttered closed.

"Look at me baby girl, Daddy's gonna cum in your mouth alright?" His voice was shaky, and you could tell he was really close. You obeyed and opened your eyes, making sure to give him the prettiest doe eyes ever.

That did it for him.

With one last thrust, you felt his cum run into your mouth, as a low guttural growl left his lips, his head thrown back in pure ecstasy.

When he'd felt the last drop of cum leave him, he released his grip on your head and removed himself from your mouth with a pop. You were a mess in front of him, and you were pretty sure your slick was beginning to collect in a puddle beneath you.

You decided to tease him a little, so you opened your mouth and showed him his dirty work, before closing your mouth again and swallowing.

When you opened your mouth again to reveal that you'd swallowed his cum, he let out a small groan before patting your head gently as if to praise you.

"Good fucking girl." He sighed, before fixing his boxers and pants.

You whined slightly when he'd put himself away, but you remembered that this was your punishment.

Fuck.

Maybe being a brat wasn't such a good idea after all..

"Alright Princess, go take care of yourself and get cleaned up, Jolyne just texted and said she's almost home."

When you didn't move, he looked up at you, with tired eyes.

"Oh right, aftercare. I've always been bad at it.." He pinched the bridge of his nose, scolding himself, before getting up and picking your nightgown and panties off of the floor.

He noticed the tired look in your eyes and sighed.

"Come here baby." He held his arms open and waited for you to come to him.

You tiredly wobbled your way to him, resting your head on his shoulder before he picked you up and carried you down the hall to the guest bathroom.

"Want me to tell Jolyne to stay at the hospital for the night?" He mumbled, setting you down lightly.

You nodded your head quietly, to which he pulled his phone out and called his daughter, beginning to run a bath for the two of you.

"Hey. You don't have to come home tonight, stay with your girlfriend and support her. I know she needs it."

You heard Jolyne questioning her dad on the other side and guilt hit your gut almost immediately.

You trudged to the bathtub and got in, hugging your knees to your chest.

"Alright, just be home at a reasonable time. Y/N fell asleep so I'll send her back home in the morning." He lied, pinching the bridge of his nose in agitation.

Hearing him lie for you, all because you wanted him to cuddle with you and bath with you, made you feel even worse. You couldn't believe you did this with your best friends dad.

"See you tomorrow, be safe. Love you. Bye." He hung up and looked over at you, to find that you were now crying.

"What's wrong Princess?" He asked, wiping your tears away with his thumb.

You explained how guilty you felt, and that you didn't regret anything, but you still felt like a horrible friend.

"I'm not good with this stuff, but I'll be honest with you. What we did tonight was very wrong, but it happened, there's nothing we can do about it. You aren't a horrible friend, you're not gross, nasty, none of those things, you're human, we all make choices in our lives that aren't the best, but some of those choices lead to better things later down the road Princess." His voice was soft and gentle, something you'd never heard from him before, and it was oddly comforting.

"Thank you Mr.Kujo." you muttered, leaning against his hand as he caressed your face.

"Just call me Jotaro."

"Or Daddy." You laughed lightheartedly.

"Both of those names are only to be used in private alright? I don't want you to get into any trouble."

Hearing him say this surprised you, was he not worried about potentially getting fired? Arrested even? Why was he more worried about you than himself?

"Look, I have something to admit. If you feel uncomfortable, just tell me and I promise to leave you alone and pretend this never happened, alright?"

You looked up at him with worry, telling him to go ahead.

"I like you. A lot. I know I've always been a huge dick, but that's only because I was trying to push you away before it got to this point. As you can see, my efforts were of no use." He sighed, rubbing your thigh gently.

"Let me propose an idea."

"And that would be?" You were genuinely interested now.

"I'll be your sugar daddy behind closed doors. You'll follow a list of rules, and if you break any of the important ones, we'll end it, how does that sound?" His eyes scanned your face for any uneasiness, but when he found none, he visibly relaxed.

You chuckled a little bit and smiled.

"I don't mind that at all, as long as you don't have a problem with it, then I don't."

"I don't mind having you as my sugar baby." He smirked and gave you a small kiss, petting your head gently.

As the two of you sat there, you couldn't help but think to yourself..

'What did I just get myself into?'

[ackerfics]

hi! i don’t know if you’re taking requests but if you are would you be interested in a soulmate au with mikasa. i adore soulmates au a lot! mikasa x fem!reader (aot cast reincarnated into the modern world and they get to have a happy and not stressful life)

she is half of my soul, as the poets say  — mikasa ackerman

— mikasa ackerman x female reader (soulmate au)

— warnings: none, just fluff

— summary: you finally found each other.

— word count: 3.2k

— author’s notes: thank you so much for the request !! i hope you enjoy reading this because i had a blast putting this all together. plus, i couldn't help but place a quote from 'the song of achilles' bc that was a masterpiece.

Underwater.

Your surroundings were submerged in the depths of the ocean to you.

The professor in front of the lecture hall continued his lesson in a cacophony of white noise. The occasional flipping of textbooks and the clacking of the keyboard droned, a majority of the students tried taking down what the middle-aged man was reciting. You should be doing those, too, but there was something about your day that made you want to skip class and bury yourself in a mound of blankets. The air-conditioning wasn’t helping at all, it just made you drift away, even more, images of flying people and humanoid giants flickering through your mind. Even your vision was becoming blurry as you stared at the seat in front of you, not noticing how your Ethics professor dismissed your class with a reminder of the paper that was due the following week. You were still seated as most of the students stood up, eager to spend the rest of their day inside their dormitories and apartments.

“[Name].” Somebody called out to you but the raw feeling of swinging in midair acted like a bubble, keeping you from going back to reality. The voice groaned in frustration at your lack of response. “Earth to [Name]! Hey, wake up!”

You shook out of your stupor with a blink, turning your head slowly at the person waiting for you. You took in her casual attire, so different from the daydream you were in. At first, you didn’t know about your whereabouts, making you look around the lecture hall — empty except for the two of you and the professor at front. The feeling of confusion once again dominated your sound mind as you breathed out, “Where am I? I thought I was just outside in this desert and I was surrounded by people who were crying like they were a hopeless case. Then there was someone screaming my name, saying they wouldn’t let me go.”

The person pursed their lips, concerned and slightly creeped out at the nonsense coming out of your mouth. There weren’t any deserts near you right now because you two were in the middle of the city, inside a university. The way you phrased those words sounded like a plot from an apocalyptic movie you were bound to binge during academic breaks. There were accounts scattered around the internet about reincarnation that the person drank in the early hours of dawn when they couldn’t go to sleep but witnessing it in front of them, was another whole level of conspiracy theories. A hand was planted on your shoulder, your friend smiling sympathetically at you, knowing that you sometimes have these episodes inside your shared apartment. The look you gave them was enough to erase the wariness bubbling in your friend’s stomach, which spurred them to gather your things and placing them inside your backpack. Your friend worked in silence, however, they were aware of the stare you never took off from the side of their head.

“In case you don’t remember me,” your friend looked up at you with a twinkle of mischief in their irises, “I’m Hitch and I’m your roommate.” She was speaking to you as if you were a toddler, something that made annoyance tickle your chest.

“Hitch?” You mumbled, looking down on your lap for a solid minute until you gasped out loud, the sound echoing inside the lecture hall without any warning. The professor looked up from his seat, glare already in place at the disruption you caused. You buried your face in your hands, face erupting in hues of red because of the embarrassment creeping in your throat. “Oh, my God, don’t tell me I did it again.”

Hitch nodded with a shrug. “I mean, I’m used to your episodes but it always amazed me how you wake up from them all disoriented.” Finishing with her task of tidying your bag, she pulled on your arm. “I think I should record whatever you say next time, this could be my viral moment.” When you gave her a dry glare, she laughed. “Oh, come on, think of the possibilities! But pushing that aside, let’s have dinner first.”

“Hitch, it’s only four in the afternoon.”

She scoffed lightheartedly. “We can always have a midnight snack later. Right now, I’m craving something savory.” The two of you went outside the lecture hall’s door, not missing the look of relief from your Ethics professor as you linked your arm with Hitch’s. She turned to you expectantly. “Any ideas for dinner, bub?”

There was a churning feeling inside your stomach, very much like those life-and-death situations during exams where you rely on your gut for the correct answer if the test includes multiple-choice questions. This time, instead of the nagging voice telling you to encircle the first choice, your gut was telling you to head to the café near your university. Aside from their famous coffee blends and teas (the latter being one of their specialties), the café houses a variety of dishes in its menu, which doesn’t make them a café anymore but the owner still insisted that they’ll be known as that establishment. It was more of a restaurant than your regular coffee shop, making it a hit among the students in the University of Eldia, where a majority of the student body was either caffeine-dependent or reliant on fast food take-outs. The quaint café owned by Levi Ackerman was the perfect solution to yours and Hitch’s grumbling stomachs. 

“How about the café just outside of uni?” You suggested, hoping that Hitch will consider the idea.

The said girl hummed, a finger placed on her chin. “The one owned by that grumpy short-stack?” 

“Hey, that’s rude.”

Hitch shrugged without care, hoisting her tote bag up to her shoulder. “Even his cousin calls him that, you know?” At your raised eyebrow, all Hitch could do was laugh at your adorable, clueless expression. Between the two of you, the light-haired girl was the social butterfly in your friendship and you wouldn’t be surprised if she even had an inkling of the gossips happening around your year level. 

“Relax, his cousin is a good person (that is if she doesn’t kill you with her blank stare), along with their little friendship circle. I must say, all of them look so adorable. You remember Annie, right?” She continued when she saw you nod, the mention of the blonde made you remember your time when the three of you shared your apartment. It was a good kind of chaotic, the three of you balancing out each other’s personalities. Annie was always the indifferent one, Hitch the most sociable, and you being the mediator of the two. “She’s dating one of Mikasa’s friends, Armin. Mikasa is the cousin, by the way, and I can clearly see the resemblance between her and the café’s owner. With the permanent scowl and all.”

“Uh-huh.”

You didn’t know what to do with the information so you only hummed and nodded your head every time Hitch spewed out a couple of trivia involving people you have heard down the hallways or being called during roll-calls. She even told you how one of Mikasa’s friends, Sasha Braus, was reprimanded for eating inside the class of an infamous terror teacher, which landed the girl on that professor’s blacklist. The girl, Sasha, was actually in one of your classes but you never really talked to her, all of your attention poured out into absorbing what the teacher relayed in the class. All of Hitch's ramblings spanned the entirety of your walk to the café — a talent your roommate has that amazed you every time it happened. 

The smell of cinnamon greeted you once you stepped inside the café, the homey decorations making your heart warm in an instant. There were a couple of college students in separate tables, all of them draping their textbooks and readings in front of them, headphones plugged in despite the soothing background music brought by the café’s speakers. Now that you mention it in your head, midterms were coming up in a month and you hadn’t started organizing your revisions. As your mind was filled with the scent of flowers and coffee, Hitch tugged on the sleeves of your blouse, your light-haired friend wordlessly gesturing her head towards one of the empty tables overlooking the window showing the small garden beside the café. You nodded and flashed a thumbs-up, already knowing what Hitch’s order is the number of times she went home with take-outs from this establishment.

Thinking that you should order something for a change, you looked up at the menu board above the counter. With your order listed in your mind, you faced the person manning the counter, ready to relay your order to her. What greeted you, though, wasn’t a smiling cashier, instead, wide gray eyes stared at you with a slacked jaw — irises flecked with an emotion that sent your heart lurching inside your chest. She was a tall girl with muscles in the right places, black hair styled in a pixie cut that made you appreciate her features more. You faintly recalled that she was in one of your majors, which should explain the air of familiarity surrounding her. Her hands on the small notepad hovered over the current lilac paper, her posture rod straight as her breath hitched while staring into you. You weren’t sure what made her react like that so you slightly tilted your head back to look at the booths behind you. Hitch caught your eyes, raising her eyebrow in a silent question. Facing the counter attendant again, you were shocked to see that star-like tears were decorating her eyelashes, chapped lips wobbly. 

It felt like you’ve seen that expression too many times but you were sure this was the first time you saw her face to face.

“Oi, Mikasa, why are you stalling?” A short black-haired man entered the space behind the counter, arms crossed and gaze questioning as he took in the breaking form of his employee. “It’s been a full minute and you still didn’t take the customer’s order.” 

“Can I stay in the breakroom for a while?”

Your breath was taken away at the sound of her voice. It sounded like all four seasons were present in the soft-spoken tone she carried, very different from her tough physical appearance. You were left staring at her back, chest nearly bursting open because of how fast your heart pounded just from that sentence. Images of late-night trysts played in your head; of secret kisses that created an ocean of emotions inside you; of eyes looking at each other with tendrils of hope before the gates open, death beckoning you in its arms; of desperate promises, neither person could ever keep. All of them were so familiar and nostalgic that a swarm of butterflies was starting to infest your ribs and chest, sprouting flowers that clogged your throat from speaking. 

Levi glanced at you, eyes analyzing your form with a hint of concern for his relative and wondering what made Mikasa act like that. “Sure, go ahead, brat, your friends are at the back. Hello, ma’am, I’ll be taking your order.”

“Oh, sure,” you murmured before beginning to list down the food you and Hitch will be indulging in, eyes curiously staring at the girl going inside the breakroom. “Uhm, is she going to be alright?” You tried asking Levi, who only looked at you with a raised eyebrow. “It looks like she had a fright here.”

“It’s the first time I saw her in that state, to be honest,” Levi simply answered, with no room for other discussions. “Your drinks will be served shortly.” He gave you a small gadget, his pointer finger pushing a button on the device, making it light up in a blinding red. “Once your drinks are ready, this will light up and you can get it here on the counter. Thank you for your patronage.”

“Thank you, too.”

It was only when you seated yourself in front of Hitch that you realized Mikasa’s voice sounded like the one always shouting your name in your daydreams, failing to keep the promise of never letting you go.

-

Mikasa was a mess.

First, before waking up for her 7 A.M. class one autumn day, she was haunted by the memories of her previous life (or this is what Armin told her, with him also remembering being born again from a different timeline, another universe altogether rather). In that more outdated version of this world, they were on the constant grapple with these beings called Titans. Her dreams became more complex the more time passed by as these Titans disappeared, replacing with it a looming war between two countries. Her daydreams always resulted in tear-stained cheeks, eyes then finding her best friend who started a mass genocide in their previous lives, Eren. When Mikasa remembered that part of her last life, she would often find herself staring deeply at the side of Eren’s head, resulting in the brown-haired man complaining about her soulless eyes. It looked like Eren didn’t remember it, which nearly drove Mikasa mad. 

Until that day Eren came up to her after a three-hour lecture, all haggard with his man-bun in disarray, and shouting, “I’m so sorry for laughing at you, Mikasa! I had a dream during a lecture of those titan things you and Armin are talking about. I believe you!”

Second, the warmth of somebody was a constant in balancing out the horrors of her daydreams. Among the carnage, a body fitting against hers with the morning rays passing through the slit of the windows was a sight she didn’t want to wake up from. Threads of soft hair tickled her cheek, making way for an unforgettable shade of irises that she compared to the crystals they found underneath the Reiss estate. A smile so vibrant that it paled in comparison to the blue expanse of unknown waters they saw after killing all the Titans in Paradis. The smell of freshly picked flowers lingered in the air, acting like the comforting blanket Mikasa had when she was young. At first, she couldn’t see the face of the person but as the episodes became more vivid, Mikasa finally saw the woman of her dreams. 

Pulchritudinous — that’s what you are.

After that encounter with you in the café, Mikasa immediately talked everything out with her two friends.

“So you’re saying that you kind of knew her but you don’t?” Eren pointed out after a spoonful of ice cream. “This is some conspiracy theory shit right here.”

“Eren,” Armin sighed. “This is not one of those videos you watch at 3 A.M., okay?” The blonde glanced at the last member of their little trio, who was pacing in front of them with a queasy expression on her face. “Mikasa, I know you feel like you’re in a pinch but please calm down.”

Eren leaned forward and took a spoonful of ice cream from the tub on the low table. “It’s no use, Armin. You know Mikasa.” He nodded his head towards the said girl. “Once she enters that state, we can’t do anything about it.”

“I know,” Armin trailed off, dejected.

Mikasa buried her hands through her hair. “This was so unexpected.”

“Clearly,” Eren dryly stated.

The blue-eyed boy beside him instantly hit the back of his head. “Eren!”

Mikasa stopped pacing, not hearing how Eren exclaimed ‘finally’, her face and neck erupting in a warm shade of red that made her two friends exchange a concerned glance. Placing a hand on her pounding chest, she murmured with half-lidded eyes, “She’s much more beautiful than my dreams depicted her to be.”

Armin breathed out a silent ‘oh’ while Eren snickered, “Great, she turned into a simp,” to which the former slapped another hand at the back of the green-eyed boy’s head.

“That explains it,” the black-haired girl exclaimed. “There were times where a voice inside my head tells me to be at this specific place at a specific time.” (“I’m concerned,” Eren stage-whispered to Armin.) “While applying for this university, I had a feeling that I should take up medical sciences. Every time I’m at the campus, I will always find myself in the library after five o’clock and there are instances that I would search the tables. And you guys know how I hate helping Levi in the café.” Eren and Armin nodded as if they were children. “I just realized that she was always there, I can see her now. Why did I miss her when all this time, I was meant to find her? And now that she’s finally in the café right when I told Levi that I felt like helping the shop, I ran away! I’m such an idiot!” Mikasa then sunk on one of the plush chairs, her groans mingling with the gloomy atmosphere she created.

“You’re not an idiot, Mikasa,” Armin told her, to which she replied with an aggravated groan.

“Yeah, you’re not an idiot, you’re just having a gay panic moment,” Eren casually announced. Both of his friends slowly turned their heads toward him. He stared right back, blinking as he shrugged. “You have to admit, I’m not wrong.”

“You’re not helping right now.”

“I’m just stating a fact, Armin!”

The blonde boy rolled his eyes. “So what are you going to do about this, Mikasa?”

“About Eren?”

“No,” Armin shook his head. “Eren will be fine with his two brain cells.”

“Hey, I’m right here.”

Armin rolled his eyes and fixed his gaze on his gray-eyed best friend. “So are you going to tell [Name] that you two are star-crossed lovers pre-destined since your previous lives?”

The confidence she gained the day before during that conversation with her childhood friends dissipated as Mikasa awkwardly stood in the middle of the university’s library, eyes widely staring at you, who was browsing the shelves for the reference material for your papers. She didn’t expect to meet you this suddenly. All she was supposed to do was borrow a reference material and there she realized that the two of you share the same major so most of your schedule line up with one another — the both of you share a free period. Almost as if you were surrounded by a magnetic field, Mikasa went in your direction, her heart matching her footsteps. Meters became feet as she looked at your captivating figure. Even with a shirt tucked inside a pair of jeans, you are still the most beautiful girl inside the library. 

And as you lifted your gaze, your glinting irises meeting her gray ones, Mikasa swore her orbit was waiting for this moment to be tilted to you.

Tears were immediately present in your eyes when she stood in front of you, it was as if you remembered her.

“Hey,” Mikasa breathed shakily, hands gripping the strap of her backpack.

“Hey, starlight.”

That nickname. The one you blurted out when Mikasa invited you stargazing in the meadow beside the Survey Corps Headquarters. You said it suited her because her eyes reminded you of the glow of the stars forming a canopy above you. But for her, you were brighter than any star in the sky, you were an entire cosmos altogether. “You became a part of me the moment I laid my eyes on you in our town. Right then and there — wherever you go, I’ll go. Because I know, I’m a part of you as well.”

“You finally found me.”

You are half of her soul, as the poets say, and the Fates will do everything in their power that it stays like that for eternity. 

[zoellajulien]

come upon morning

(Peter Parker x Reader)

angst - words: 2.1k

OPEN ENDING BELOW

"Alright! Enough from you!" Your friend laughed loudly as he smacked your other friend in the back of the head, turning to face you. "It's your turn. Give us all the details!"

You shifted awkwardly, laughing and rubbing your arms for comfort. The conversation happening between your group was on the subject of 'the ones who got away', which you all had experience in. "Fine, fine. Just be quiet and sit down!"

A hush fell over the room as you opened a book and pulled some photos out of the page. Curiosity spread as the photos were passed around for everyone to look at.

"Why do you keep these on that page?" One friend asked, looking over your shoulder at the highlighted text.

"I keep them close to a quote on it. It says 'you'll always be mine, in the back of my mind. I'll look for you in my next life.' I found this quote when I was in a dark place, and it reminded me of him. Because that's how I'll always feel." You explained to them, passing another picture around.

In the photo, the boy had a straw taped badly to his head with a ridiculous smile spread across his face. His nose was wrinkled too, adding to the joyous atmosphere the picture captured. His brown curls were splattered across his head and face in a mess, along with a hastily put-in butterfly clip. You felt warmth blooming inside you while looking at it. Your friends laughed at the picture, pointing out various (but positive) things about him to one another.

"What are you doing? You look ridiculous!"

"I'm a unicorn! You should be a unicorn too!"

"Wait until Tony sees this. No- I am not sticking a straw to my forehead like a crackhead!"

"Psh, you don't know what you're missing, then!"

"That boy was my whole world. We were best friends before we lovers, but we always did everything together. One time, we both failed an exam on accident, and celebrated! We drove around for hours just because." You reminisced.

"Dude, one kid sitting next to me was all 'I got this in the bag! Studied all night long!'" Peter chuckled, pushing his curls from his face with the hand that held yours. He pushed his lips against your knuckles softly.

"Are you serious? Dude, if you can't even pass the exam, then everyone else definitely failed. Their ego was 100% bruised afterward, I'm sure of it." You snickered, blushing as your eyes cast over his form. His skin glowed from the kiss of sunset colors. "Hey! Careful! You almost hit that bird! Ugh, your driving is the worst!"

Peter's laugh brought a smile to your lips as you teased him, knowing full-well you drove much worse than he did. Poking his side with your finger to tease him more, he squirmed away and began to make faces.

"Oi! I'm trying to keep us alive! Stop that!" He snickered.*

"I hope you know that we are absolutely not listening to this song! My turn to control the cord!" You cheered, snatching his phone away.

"What? No! I'm the driver, I control the music!"

"In your dreams, Parker! And don't take your eyes off the freaking road, you health-hazard of a human being!"

"Oh, please! I drive better than you do! And either way, you know you love me!"

"That, yes, that is very true. I can not deny that." You giggled with a happy sigh.

"What else did you guys do?"

"So much! We went on great adventures and vacations together but also enjoyed simple moments. One day, I was frustrated with everything so I started crying on the kitchen floor when the empty pot slipped from my hand." You laughed at yourself, shaking your head. "He came in with a sympathetic heart and dumped a bunch of pots on the floor. At first, I got even angrier. Because, hello, that was a huge mess! But then he started constructing them together on a mat and grabbed two dowels for the both of us."

Peter cursed when he saw your form, panicking slightly as he tried to come up with a solution to fix the sad mood you owned. The poor brunette had come in, more than ready to defend you from an attacker, after being alerted to the crashing sound of a pan hitting the tiled flooring. Trying to think quickly on his feet, he leaned past you to pick up said fallen pot along with a large group of others.

"What are you doing? I swear to god I will smash your face into the cabinet if you think I'm going to clean this up."

Peter wordlessly grabbed your hand and placed the dowel in your hand, kissing each finger as he twisted them into a fist. He reached up and brushed a piece of hair away from your face, smiling sweetly at your confused face.

"What do I need this for?" You questioned, still slightly irritated.

"What? What was he doing, exactly?"

"We actually started playing them together, on the floor. He cheered me up in less than an hour. I went from crying in frustration to crying from laughter." A blush crept its way up your body as a love-sick smile made its appearance.

Crawling on the floor, Peter gently pulled you by your empty hand next to him. A whine of protest escaped your lungs, but you eventually gave in and looked at the pots in front of you. He reached around you, his arms controlling yours. He began beating the wooden sticks against the metal and copper pots.

"I love you! I love you! My darling!" He sang out dramatically, badly playing out an improvised tune, hiding his smile when he noticed you were forcing one to hide. "My darling! She's oh-so-beautiful!"

Laughter bubbled within your chest and escaped into the air around the two of you. A smirk made its made to your boyfriend's lips at the achievement of making you happy. He pressed a kiss to your cheek before continuing his actions.

Eventually, he moved and sat beside you, using his wooden stick to bang on the pans. He laughed after you made a pun referring to the pots, shaking his head in amusement.

"Come one, sing a duet with me."

"Nooo."

Peter began singing loudly but slow enough for you to try and match his lyrics. You were pretty sure the two of you were bothering the neighbors at this point.

A bubble of snickers filled the room after someone mentioned just how in love you seemed to be even after he left.

"You see, this big teddy bear of a human being loved to travel, so one day he showed up outside my job and picked me up. We ended up driving for a long time until we had a picnic underneath the stars. I taught him a bunch of the constellations."

"Peter! C'mon, tell me where we're going! You're boring me!" You joke, shoulders shaking in laughter when you do.

"No! You can't know yet! It's called a surprise, babe!" He protests, taking one hand off the wheel and easing his foot off the accelerator. Using the empty hand he has, he pokes your side once safely stopped at a red light.

"Ugh. You're a pain. I hope you know that." You paused for a few minutes before saying: "Are we there yet?"

"We are literally still driving! Relax!"

The drive continued for another hour or so before you pulled up onto a hill that sat beside a glistening lake. By that time, it was well past midnight. You would have fallen asleep if Peter's energetic and proding, literally, personality. He sang loudly to you and was constantly poking you in the ribs, although gently.

"We've arrived! I hope you're hungry!"

After the picnic, you rested by his side, enjoying the comforting kisses he left across your face. "I love you, but I'd appreciate it if you would pay attention to my lesson!" You whined*

"Alright, Teach. What do you have for me to learn? Not math, I hope." He replied in turn with a broad smirk.

With a sharp eye-roll, you sat up, taking his finger, and pointing it at the sky. "Big dipper." You drug it over to a separate spot. "Little dipper."

"I like this lesson. Teach me more."

"He sounded amazing. What happened to you two?"

"The part of him yearning for adventure became too difficult to ignore, and he knew he needed to go. Of course, he offered for me to come with him, but my parents refused. They told me how my focus was to be on where I was going in the future, so their force kept us apart." You set down the Polaroid picture to pick up another one, this one of a car. The brunette sat on top of it, clearly singing and dancing. "The night he left was a hard one for us all. His aunt and mentor came over so we could all wish him goodbye. I was angry at my parents, but they were right. My future was very uncertain with him, especially since he didn't know where he would be going."

A stray tear made it's down your cheek, dropping onto the hoodie of his you wore. Your friend wrapped an arm over your shoulder.

"Eventually, after he packed his car for the journey and his weeping aunt gave him one last hug, I was called over. I opened the door to be closer to him and sat, looking at him. His cheeks were damp with tears, as were mine, but we smiled. He put his hand into mine and kissed me, so softly, as if I were glass."

"You look beautiful today, you know. Is that dress new?" Peter's fingers danced up your arm to cup your cheek.

"I bought it just for you, for today. I wanted you to see me looking my best, so you can remember me this way when you go."

"I still don't know if I want to go." He admitted, ducking his head before looking back into your eyes.

"You have to. You need to go because your heart is calling." You whispered, reluctant to admit the truth as much as he was. "And you don't have to be scared, because I will always be with you along this journey." You placed your hand on his heart.

"He pleaded for me to go that night, to go with him. I told him I couldn't, that it wasn't an option."

You set down the picture while standing, grabbing one from underneath a flipped-over picture frame. One of your friends picked up the frame and felt anguish at seeing the picture inside the glass.

The same boy the conversation was about sat somewhere, clearly in a place with bright lights. He wore a white, short-sleeve top that ended with the picture. His eyes were blood-shot, curls messy as can be, but a smile sat across his lips, despite being clearly in pain.

"This noise is going to be the death of me, I swear."

"Kid, you've got a lot more fighting to kill you right now than the lights. At least try to act concerned for yourself." Tony's voice strained, dry from tears. "They are probably the smallest problem you have as of now."

"Don't say stuff like that. Please." Your voice croaked, all the tears you had now gone from crying them away. "It can't be like that. No."

"That picture was taken a few months before he left. This one is a copy of the photo he took with him." You explained, showing it around. "I loved him so much, you know, and he loved me too. I could tell since he had some much trouble leaving us. But I knew he had to go."

In the last photo sat you both, side-by-side, asleep. One of his arms draped over your side while he spooned you from behind with his face buried into the skin of your neck. You had hair flopped over one eye and one hand tucked into his dangling by your front. The two of you had corresponding colors on your nails, a bright red. It had been his idea after a tired sleep-over reached well past two in the morning. It was a fond memory of yours.

Your friend pulled you tight to his chest, noticing the balance you were struggling to keep between sobbing or staying straight-faced. Eventually, the tears came out, but a smile stayed on your lips as you remembered Peter.

You remembered his laughter that was always accompanied by his contagious smile or smirk. Also on the list, you remembered his ability to sweet-talk you into sneaking out to see him on nights he wasn't 100% busy. However, you also remembered how he left you, leaving a longing feeling that turned into unheard wishes.

You just wish his departure had actually happened like that.

taglist: @rorybutnotgilmore @petersasteria @elios-timotea

[simpingforsoftboys]

Love Me, Love Me Not

ft. Kuroken

G/N Reader

TW: Insecurities... I think that’s it?

Read This First

Mini Series Here

Okay part 2/4 for the continuation of “Toxic Things They Do” request. This is probably the hardest one for me because I’m better at writing Kuroken x reader on a platonic level aha. Not proofread because your girl is a slacker-

You’re sitting on the floor of your living room, staring at the tv while Kenma plays on the new PS5 he bought. He’s seated in Tetsuro’s lap, the dark haired male is busy yapping his ear off- to which Kenma lets out small hums of acknowledgement every once in a while to show he’s listening. You want to join them up there, somehow the couch seems so far away from you. Like a pillar high in the sky- only serving to show off what you can’t ever really have. It seems a little dramatic to be thinking that way, sure, but you have a valid reason to put it in such a manner. You know, since you’re allergic to leather and all.

Tetsuro was always so caring, constantly doting on the ones he loves. With his trashy puns, troublesome smirk, and sparkling eyes that promised a good time, he was perhaps the ideal man. He gave his all for those he cared for, seemingly nothing about him was selfish... and yet the leather couch had been Tetsuro’s idea- he had always been fond of the material after all. Even when you brought up the whole issue of you being allergic to it- he still insisted that they purchase a leather sofa. 

“We’ll just buy you a separate arm chair or something.” Kenma had said after listening to the both of you argue back and forth. “It’s not like we don’t have the money.” It hurt more looking back on it now than it did at the time. It was an unreasonable solution, but it wasn’t like Kenma was going to disagree with Kuroo. He never did. At least when it came to you that is.

You continue staring at them. There’s something about the way that Tetsuro gazes at Kenma that just screams love and contentment. He’s never looked at you that way- even back when you were in denial you knew that much. Kenma never had to do what you would need to in order to keep his attention on him. All Kenma needed to do was exist- unlike you- he never had to earn dear Kuroo’s love. 

Tetsuro only doted on those he loved. He loved Kenma. And he only seemed to love you when Kenma wasn’t around.

“Y/n...” The messy haired male called, long arms winding around your torso. “Let’s go to the arcade! I made some reservations- we have the whole place to ourselves for a few hours.” 

You remember being excited at the time- finally you would get to go on a date with Tetsuro. It had been so long since your last one. 

“Really? That’s awesome! Let me just get dressed.” You slipped into a pair of jeans and a band t-shirt before hurrying to meet Kuroo at the door. “Tetsu I’m-”

“I can’t believe you got called in so last minute. It’s too late to cancel the reservations already kitten.” Kuroo whines into the phone, obviously talking to Kenma. “Yeah I’m just bringing Y/n, no point in wasting money... oh? Okay see you later. Love you kitten~”

Needless to say, your day seemed a lot less exciting after overhearing that conversation.

Kuroo gently nudged the smaller male aside, standing up to go use the restroom. The two of you made eye contact briefly, he winked playfully before continuing on his way to the bathroom. Your gaze fell upon Kenma- who was still rapidly pushing buttons and triggers on his controller. 

Kenma had always been elusive. It was one of the things that drew you into him. He looked so uncaring about everything, at first you couldn’t even have imagined that he would be so attentive to every detail. Was it a trait he had gained from Tetsuro or vice versa? People do say lovers begin sharing habits over time. At first you could barely distinguish one of his expressions from another, but as you spent more time in his company you found much more than you could have hoped. You discovered that he was constantly changing, learning to be more expressive. Each time you thought you had him figured out- he had already developed beyond that.

The minuscule way his lips would upturn when he was amused soon changed into a hidden smile, chuckles threatening to escape his throat. Then that changed to a slightly wider one, showing the smallest amount of his teeth. Eventually he learned to forgo his embarrassment entirely- and he would laugh freely, all teeth, heart, and soul, in it. Yes, Kenma was a constantly evolving individual- like the ever changing maze in the maze runner. There was seemingly no escape to him- just twists and turns and dead ends. He was impossibly deep- a promise of a myriad of mysteries within his eyes. 

But you were just another runner- doomed to be lost in the maze- but never to escape it. Kuroo on the other hand was something else. He was on a completely different level- skilled in his knowledge of Kenma- able to come and go as he pleased. You doubted he’d ever wanted to escape. Neither did you- at first. 

Out of the two of them, Kenma had always been more receptive of you. It had surprised even Kuroo himself actually. You didn’t doubt Kenma’s love for you- not like you doubted Tetsuro’s- but you also knew that he’d never care for you as much as he did Kuroo. It showed in the little things.

“Y/n did you want to play with me?” Kenma’s soft voice carried over where you were- snuggled up in blankets, playing Animal Crossing while sitting in your arm chair. He had his own red and blue Switch in his hands. Kuroo had been home at the time, you recall hearing him snoring away in your bedroom. “It’s been awhile since it was just us.”

You smiled at his words and agreed. The two of you visiting each others islands and irritating your beloved villagers. It was fun, spending time with Kenma, and you could tell that he was enjoying himself- and not just because of the game. He would shoot you shy, soft smiles when he thought you weren’t looking. It was those smiles that really kept you clinging onto the sinking ship that was your relationship. 

Kenma loved you.

The smiles directed towards Kuroo were different. They weren’t shy- instead they were familiar and open. Kenma had known Kuroo far longer than he had you. The comfort he took in him was of an entirely separate magnitude. Naturally, this was the same with the amount of love he held for him too. 

He looked happier with Kuroo than he did with you.

Maybe it’s because of that fact that you decided to break the news to Kenma first. Making sure that your skin was covered with you long sleeves, pants, and socks, you made your way over to where Kenma was seated. His eyes tore away from the screen to stare at you worriedly. 

“Y/n your allergies-” He began.

“It’s fine, as long as my bare skin doesn’t touch the leather.” You reply, sitting beside him. You know you shouldn’t- not when you’re about to say this- but you yank him into a hug anyways. You hug Kenma tight and hard, because he’s the only one in this relationship that might even love you a sliver as much as you love him. He tries to turn, so that he can embrace you too- but you won’t let him, opting to pin his arms down with your own. It’ll hurt too much to do this if you let him hold you. 

“Y/n what’s wrong?” He asks and he looks at you like you’re the only one in the world for that moment. Bitterly, you wonder if this is what it feels like to be in Kuroo’s shoes. Yet again, you are reminded that while this is a rare sensation for you- it’s a daily occurrence between the two of them- looking at each other like they hung the stars up in the sky- that is. 

“I have to tell you something Kenma.” You murmur, licking your lips. “But first I’m going to let you go, right after I try to memorize what you feel like against me. And you have to promise not to try to hug me after that okay?” 

“W-why? What’s wrong Y/n?” He struggles again, fear overtaking his heart at your words. “What is it?”

“J-just promise me. You can be mad, you can cry, hell you can even laugh afterwards. But don’t try to reach out and hug me okay?” He’s never seen you so serious, so he nods his head. 

“I promise.” He agrees and stops fighting against you. You do your best to memorize this- the feeling of him in your arms. He’s warm and despite his lithe figure he’s firm against you. His hair is smooth and soft- since you had managed to drill into him how important hair maintenance was- it smells like his pricey conditioner. You rest your cheek against his for a long moment, before forcing yourself to pull away from him entirely. The half blonde abides by his promise, but it’s clear that he wants to reach out to you.

“This is going to hurt me a lot more than it’s going to hurt you.”

“What are you saying?” Kenma’s anxious now, eyes searching for answers in your own pools of e/c. 

“But you have Tetsuro... I don’t know how he’ll feel about this- but he’ll probably be furious with me.” You continue, heavy tears slipping from your tear ducts. “I don’t think this is working out Kenma-”

“What did I do?” He asks, wide eyed and desperate- you can hear the pain in his tone. “Did you fall out of love with me- with us?” The angel and devil perched on your shoulders agree that you should lie to him- tell him ‘yes, I did fall out of love with you.’ The angel says it’s better to do it this way, to spare him the pain of knowing what you went through. While the devil thinks you should say it in the most vicious way possible- to give back all the pain, the unworthiness they made you experience. But you refuse to listen, no one deserves to suffer through your insecurities.

“I’m still in love with you two.”

There’s tears spilling from both of your eyes now.

“Then why-”

“It’s because I’m not content anymore.” It’s not the full truth but it’s better than a lie right? You forgot that a half truth is a whole lie. 

“I think we deserve the truth.” Kuroo says from the entrance of the living room, he’s leaning against the doorway, arms crossed. “Not some half assed explanations.” 

“Right...” You agree, blinking back your tears. “I’m so grateful for you two. Tetsuro you’re so caring and selfless, you give your heart in everything you do- I’d be lying to say that I’m over you. Kenma you’ve always been so attentive and I won’t lie- something about you just makes me want to appreciate you endlessly. But babes, you’ve been in love for so long- I can’t possibly catch up.” 

Kuroo’s expression is shocked, not expecting this. “Y/n-”

“No, please listen.” You ask of him- just this once- to listen to you. Luckily for you he does. Kenma looks like he wants to speak up too, but swallows his words. It’s the first time they’ve let you get a word in without getting defensive. Kinda poetic if you think about it. Your last 'argument’ as a throuple and the first time they’ve been able to let you say your piece.

“Tetsu, it’s clear Kenma’s your first and foremost priority. I don’t even know if what we have is love or admiration- but it’s not what I’m looking for.” You give him a sad smile and he discovers that it’s the most genuine one he’s seen from you.

“Y/n I-” He tries, only to get an impatient look from both you and Kenma. “Sorry, continue.”

“I’m a hypocrite to say this- but Kenma... this is harder to say because I’ve grown more attached to you overtime.” You hate yourself for what you’re about to say next- the hypocrisy you’re about to spew is enough to render your feelings null and void... or so you believe. “I never doubted with you- what we had... have... it’s definitely love.” 

Kenma looks ugly, his face is all scrunched up and theres snot and tears dripping down onto his lap. “It always was- still is Y/n.”

“I know baby.” You whisper back, it pains you to see him like this. “But you’re still more in love with Tetsu.” He can’t deny it either, that’s what pains him the most. “I love the both of you though. So I really do wish you the best. It’s the only thing I can do- because I can’t stay here and hold you back.”

Something inside of Kuroo’s heart cracks and he finds himself tearing up at your words. It hurts because you’re right. He doesn’t love you like that- or at least he doesn’t think so. But if that’s the case then it doesn’t make sense as to why he’s hurting. 

“I’m sorry that I had to be the one to call it quits- because I never, ever, wanted to be the one to do that. But guys-” Your voice cracks, it embodies all the heart ache you’re feeling- been feeling for so long. “When it’s just you two, at the altar, finally becoming one... I’ll be able to say with good faith that I made the right decision. So don’t fight me, don’t even say anything- this is what I want. This isn’t for just you- it’s for me too.”

They nod, facing the consequences of your choice- maybe it goes further than that. Maybe all this time the three of you were doomed to fail. If that’s the case then it’s a blessing that you’re not going down in flames. Instead this chapter is ending with a flood of tears and the promise of ruin. But there’s also the underlying hope that one day the flood will dry up and they’ll finally be able to look at the ruins without feeling regret. It’s that hope that all three of you cling too. That hope that one day you’ll be able to rebuild upon the ruins- a new temple, new kingdom. A new place for a rebuilt- or maybe even entirely new- love. 

A/N: I did Kuroo so dirty but I’m not sorry about that. In all honesty this is how I feel it’d go in a situation like this. Kuroo’s priority is always going to be Kenma. He’s a chemistry nerd- and their shared chemistry is so deep, it’s engrained onto the face of their soul. I think Kenma does really love Y/n but he’ll always love Kuroo just a little more. But sometimes a little is all the difference and is the game changer in the end. I do think, that if Kenma had loved the two of them equally- then maybe they could have been fine with a polygamous dynamic- but sadly that’s not the case.

This is also the harsh reality to a lot of poly relationships- some people enter them but aren’t prepared to love equally. So there’s an imbalance there that really shouldn’t be there. A lot of authors who write for polyships don’t touch on this but I want to be here to write about the good and the bad. 

Seeing the reader after the breakup

[stardusttrashed]

My Cup of Tea

Pairing: Levi Ackerman x fem! reader, slight Jean Kirstein x fem! reader

Warnings: Fluff, slight angst

Word Count: 7.3k

A/n: I pictured y/n as a blasian or lightskin

Most of your friends thought you were crazy for wanting to join the scouts. They didn’t understand why you’d throw your life away like that. Always telling them living inside the walls and in constant fear wasn’t living anyway probably didn’t help the situation. If anything, you might’ve just gave them all existential crises.

In hindsight, joining does seem like a death wish. Throwing yourself right towards a titan for the sake of humanity. It was no wonder people preferred to join other ranks, such as the Military Police. But the threat of death never really scared you. You always thought that you needed to feel like you were living before having a rational fear of any alternative. You couldn’t explain why, but you felt like that solution was just beyond the walls. Somewhere so close but so far. 

So you joined the 104th Training Corps and graduated second in the class. You were a close first, second to Mikasa Ackerman. That was an achievement in itself since you started a running joke with her and the others that she wasn’t human. She was some titan god in human form. Or something like that.

In reality, ranks aside, making it through the training was good enough for you. Between the rigorous training and the bunch of idiots that provided numerous headaches- and even more laughter- there were times you doubted you’d even make it through. 

“I had a hunch you were as crazy as Eren, but I didn’t think I’d be right.” There he was, your biggest headache of the bunch. Jean Kirstein. You loved the loud-mouthed, blunt boy to bits, but that didn’t mean he was any less close to getting his ass kicked at any given second. 

It was apparent he had a crush on you since day one. Well, you and Mikasa, but his fixation on Mikasa was stomped on once everyone could see how head over heels she was for Eren. So he settled for you, the next girl with exotic black hair that had no crush to get in his way. 

He sat across from you at the table with an overconfident expression.“You could join the military police instead and live peacefully. It’s the smartest thing to do.” From the corner of your eye, you could see Eren’s head snap in your direction. He was glaring daggers at the both of you, well, mostly Jean, but for once, Jean’s attention remained on you.

“Well, Jeanie-” you leaned in closer, resting your elbows on the table, “- I guess there’s a first time for everything.” you chuckled and returned to your original position, taking a bite of bread.  “You’re only half right, though; I’m crazier than the suicidal blockhead over there.”

“I can hear you two, you know,” Eren broke in. 

“Oh, I know. You may be able to kick Je-ju’s ass, but I can hold my own against you,”  you chuckled before turning back towards Jean. “Besides, being in the Military Police sounds boring,” you said with a shrug. “I joined so I could become a scout so that I could get out of these walls. I’m sure you’ll have enough fun inside the walls for both of us.” 

Jean shook his head and mutter something inaudible under his breath, clearly disapproving. 

“Coward,” Eren mumbled loud enough for the both of you to hear, causing yet another one of their famous dining hall fights to break out. You looked across the scrapping pair at Mikasa, sharing a tired and somewhat annoyed smile with her.

The next day was like a nightmare. Chaos broke out as word of the return of the Colossus Titan’s return spread like wildfire. Wall Trost had been attacked, and titans were spilling into the city. Everyone was wildly unprepared, and you’d be lying if you said you weren’t scared shitless. Without the Survey Corps, the 104th Training Corps were sent to the front lines. You were about to see your first titan and put your training to the test. It was everything you hoped for and dreaded all at once. 

You slew every titan you could that crossed my path, killing three titans alone and assisting more than you could keep track of. It wasn’t enough, though. Countless comrades were lost, either through being captured by titans or by running out of gas for their ODM gear. Nonetheless, you soared through the sky, flinging yourself from building to building as you did your part to keep humanity safe. 

Somehow in all the commotion of heading towards HQ, you got separated from the others. “Shit!” You stood on a roof, stopping to survey your surroundings. Titans still roamed through the city on the search for their next victim. Their footsteps grew closer, the building beneath your feet shaking uncontrollably. 

That’s when you saw them. The Survey Corps were back and working on the remaining few titans. You watched as Captain Levi killed a titan with ease and moved onto the two titans treading closer. He walked with such calm confidence you couldn’t help but stop to admire him. He made killing them look beautiful, like a dance. 

Without a second thought, you aimed my gear towards him, desperate for a closer look. You soared through the sky, mindlessly slaying every titan that got in between you and Levi. You were nearly there when your gear refused to function. In a quick moment of panic, you repeatedly squeezed the triggers, but nothing happened. You desperately hit the gears in hopes of bringing it back to life to no avail. You braced yourself as you began to tumble to the ground. You closed your eyes, sadly accepting your fate as the strong winds caused a few curls to fall from your ponytail. You had lived and done your fair part for humanity. At least you had taken out a few titans before your death. You prepared yourself for impact until you felt an arm wrap around your waist, pulling you back up towards a roof. 

“Trying to get yourself killed?” You were greeted with a pair of steely yet breathtaking gray eyes. You felt like you were dreaming. Captain Levi was holding you in his arms like a knight in shining armor. 

“I wasn’t, but now I’m having second thoughts- especially if it means I get to be swept off my feet by you.” You bit back a cheeky grin as you searched his eyes. His frown remained pressed in on his features despite the flash of interest in his eyes. The longer you stood there, the more you grew aware of his arm still firmly wrapped around your waist. 

He kept looking at you like he was expecting something. There was something about you that he found intoxicating. Maybe it was that mouth of yours or the wind-blown mess of black curls. His eyes trailed up from your gaze to your hair, which was probably a mess if you were being completely honest with yourself. When his eyes looked back down into your own, you couldn’t help but get lost in their storm. “You’ve got quite the balls on you, rookie. Too bad, you’re an idiot.” 

It took everything in you not to hit that smug smirk off his face. “No more of an idiot than you are, Captain.” You knew you could get written up for the way you were speaking to the captain, but the threat only spurred you on further. “Only difference between us-,,” you pressed yourself closer to him until you could feel each breath, “is that my balls are bigger.” 

Levi’s smirk was replaced with a more intense look that could’ve been mistaken as hunger as he held you tighter. “Prove it, brat.”

You searched his face for a sign he was joking as you let out a nervous giggle. You slipped out of his grasp and checked your equipment when you realized he was dead serious. “I’m out of gas. The supply team never came.”

“Well, if you don’t want to die, I’d suggest you use whatever little brain you have and think.” He nodded towards an approaching titan. Levi crossed his arms as he watched you like a game.

The 5-meter beast stumbled through the damaged buildings, rushing towards you. It was only three buildings away and covering ground fast.

Your train of thought went a mile a minute. The increasing intensity of the quakes beneath your feet only helped spur it on. You took down your hair and quickly redid your bun as you thought. “Take me as high as you can with your gear, and I’ll handle the rest.”

He hesitantly agreed, wrapping his arm around you once again. Your breath caught in your throat as you both went flying through the air towards the stumbling beast. You knew your plan was half-assed, but you couldn’t help but have faith nonetheless.

Once you were directly above the titan, you gave Levi the signal to let go, sending yourself spiraling towards the figure below. Levi watched with a dumbstruck expression as you confidently twirled through the air. You dove as gracefully as you could be with any ODM gear to help guide you. 

“Damn idiot,” Levi muttered to himself as you drew your blades. He swooped in, loosely wrapping both arms around you from behind in an attempt to help guide you. Surprisingly you managed to slice a clean chunk of the titan’s neck almost instantly. Part of him wondered if you had even needed his assistance. He carried you back up to the rooftop and gently set you down in front of him.

You twisted your body to face your savior with a cheeky smile. You shouldn’t be surprised he stepped in with such ease considering his reputation. He had no doubt worked on countless team missions, but there was something about the way you worked together that felt so natural.

“Told you I could handle it,” you mused to the annoyed-looking man in a way that came off unintentionally sexual. You wiped your blade on your sleeves before putting them back in their holders.

Levi quickly averted your gaze with a quick ‘tch,’ surveying the area. You felt like fire in his arms, which made him unusually flustered. He dropped his arms to his sides as he took a step back. He didn’t expect you to take his challenge so easily and pull it off, especially since you were out of gas. He admired that you weren’t all talk, that you could actually handle yourself. It made each annoyingly snarky comment that came out of your mouth even more intoxicating. “W-we’ll fall back. My squad can handle the rest of these ugly bastards.”

 You turned to face him only to have him continue to avoid your gaze. When he finally met your gaze again, he held his hand out to you with an expectant look in his eyes. You hesitantly took it, cupping your hand in his. It felt like electricity coursed through your veins at his touch. He pulled you closer with an unsuspecting strength, wrapping his arm around your waist once again. 

He was so casual about it while your heart felt like it was about to beat out of your chest any second now. “Is this how you get all the women, Captain?” You chuckled in hopes of concealing your nervousness. The scolding look in his eyes and the tint of red emerging on his ears spurred your teasing flirtations on. “I’m just saying-,” you rested your hand on his chest, “- your arm is starting to feel real homey right there.”

Levi looked away once again, “tch. Are you trying to live or not, brat?” 

You snaked your arms around his neck and kept quiet. Once he seemed happy with your answer, you hopped into his arms, wrapping your legs around his waist. You wanted to make sure you were as out of his way as you could be. That, and you wanted to see his reaction. You could practically see the vein bulging from his temple, but he made no effort to correct your stance. Instead, to your surprise, he moved one of his hands to hold your thigh as he made sure you were secure.

His grasp only lasted momentarily before they fell on the triggers. Taking off without being the one in control felt so different. You felt a rush of butterflies in your stomach, causing you to subconsciously wrap your legs tighter and bury your face in his neck. The more you breathed in his scent, the calmer you found yourself getting. He was like a safety blanket you never knew you needed yet never wanted to let go of.

You didn’t see much of Captain Levi once he dropped you off with the other trainees. He left without so much as a bye. Not that there was much time to anyway. You couldn’t dwell or even so much as daydream. The days that followed were filled with cleaning up the remnants of your fallen comrades. There were so many bodies that went unidentified; it made you sick to your stomach—the only person who was more torn up about it than you was Jean.

Graduation followed soon after. You were officially able to call yourself a Scout. The next morning you and the others who joined the scouts were led to a castle. It was cleaner than you thought it’d be. You took your time getting to know the castle, eventually stumbling upon the Mess Hall. 

There had to be at least a dozen scouts in the room, yet you could make out one voice above the others. You anxiously looked around to find the man behind the bored sounding voice. Within a few moments, you had found him, your eyes landing on the raven-haired man with tired eyes. He was sitting with his squad and Eren across the room.

“Hey y/n, if you’re gonna keep staring, you might wanna wipe the drool off your chin,” Connie teased as he walked up behind you.

“Seriously,” Jean joined in. He slipped into the space next to you, despite this side of the room being practically empty. “I don’t get what you see in him.” He shook his head, disapprovingly.

“I’m not staring at captain Levi, you nitwit,” you snapped quietly, already annoyed by their teasing. You kept your lips in a tight line as you tried to control yourself. “I was just imagining myself being part of the Special Operations Squad,” you grumbled. 

“Y’know,” Armin piped in, nearly scaring you from his sudden intrusion in the conversation. “Neither of them said anything about Captain Levi.” I could hear his cheeky yet bashful grin in his voice. Connie’s and Jean’s obnoxious laughter only made it worse.

You turned to Armin with a deathly glare and opened your mouth to say something. You quickly closed your mouth as he met your stare. With a huff you turned away, focusing back on Captain Levi. “You’re too smart for your own good sometimes.” You couldn’t bring yourself to say anything bad about him or be rude. Armin was the little angel of the group that you always had a soft spot for. You turned to Jean, eager to get the attention off of you. “Bet if it were you I was drooling over, you wouldn’t have an issue.” You watched him with a cocky grin, basking in his dumbfounded expression. 

“Just shut up, will ya,” he barked a tad louder than necessary as he crossed his arms like a child throwing a fit.

Your eyes wandered around the room while you laughed at his reaction. To your surprise, when your eyes landed on Levi again, he was already looking in your direction.

Everything Petra was telling him went in one ear and out the other once he spotted you across the room. He cursed himself for his heart skipping a beat. It shouldn’t have been a surprise to see you here. You were crazy enough to go after a titan when you had zero gas left in your ODM gear. What would stop you from joining the scouts? He wanted to go talk to you, to at least get to know your name, but he had to stay and talk to Petra. Levi watched helplessly as you practically ran out of the room.

You tried to stall going back down to the Mess Hall as you stood in your room fixing your hair. You sprinkled some water on your hair to revitalize your curls like you would a plant. You didn’t wear your hair down often since all the wind from using the ODM turned it into a mass of tangles. 

“If you aren’t coming, can I have your serving?” 

You laughed to yourself, not needing to open the door to know who was on the other side. “You touch my serving, and I’ll kick your ass.” Sasha greeted you with wide eyes as you opened the door. She looked you up and down with a stupid grin, making you feel slightly subconscious about wearing your hair down.

“You’re gonna make Jean lose it,” she beamed, quickly cut off by a loud growl from her stomach. She scratched the back of her neck bashfully, “s-sorry I only ate one loaf for lunch.”

“Sasha,” you started with a straight face, “that’s literally how much we always get.” She looked at you like you had said the most absurd thing ever, and you raised your hands in mock defense. “You can have my bread tonight then.” 

Sasha practically dragged you by your hand to the Mess Hall. You found a seat between Connie and Armin, who not so subtly kept sneaking glances at you. Before your butt even touched the seat, Sasha nabbed your loaf of bread, plopping down across from Connie. 

“You uh, you look-.” Armin was cut off by Jean as he made himself comfy across you.

“Wow. I, uh, like your hair like that.” Jean gaped at you with a stunned look on his face. You couldn’t help but feel a boost of confidence under his gaze. It was like you were the most beautiful girl in the world.

“Hey Je-ju,” you said as seductively as you could muster, batting your eyelashes at the man in front of you. It must’ve worked cause you could hear even Armin quietly sputter beside you. Jean hummed as he leaned in closer. “You’re drooling.” 

Jean was brought back to reality by your laughter. He sat upright and muttered something under his breath before focusing on his food. He almost found the laughter that followed yours from Connie and Sasha obnoxiously annoying. 

Your laughter died out as your eyes absentmindedly scanned the room. The room was full of faces you had never seen before. Full of people willing to lay their lives down for humanity. Everywhere you looked, people looked somewhat at ease except for the short man sitting across from the commander. Unlike the others in the room, a smile never graced his lips, just a permanent frown. “Give me a sec,” you announced to the others. 

Jean’s eyes followed yours, and he quietly sighed in annoyance. You shot him a half-apologetic smile before making your way over to the pair. You swiped two cups of tea on your way over, still trying to conjure up what exactly you’d say to either of them. 

Commander Erin was the first to notice your approach, pausing his conversation with Levi so he could look up at you. His piercing ocean eyes stared at you, making you nearly forget why you even went over. 

Your breath caught in your throat as Levi deadpanned to you with an icy stare. He rolled his eyes after a long moment of silence had passed. “Looking for something, rookie?”

His curt acknowledgment made the butterflies in your stomach go wild, filling you with an antsy warmth. You felt childish for getting this nervous around him. What if he doesn’t even remember you? With a steely breath, you calmed your nerves enough to start talking.“Y/n Y/l/n of the 104th Cadet Corps,” you saluted. Erwin nodded in acknowledgment, but Levi continued to stare at you like he was bored. “I- I thought maybe you two would like something to drink—” you set down the cups in front of them, “— I was also hoping I could speak to Captain Levi.”

Levi stared at you, checking you out as discreetly as possible. He was finally able to admire your hair now that it was out of a bun. Your curls were gorgeous, like nothing he had ever seen before. You were gorgeous. He got lost in the thought of being able to run his fingers through your hair, playing with each curl on your head. 

You couldn’t tell if the expression on his face was disapproval or if he was intrigued, but you carried on either way. “I was hoping to be under you.” You grimaced at the slip of my tongue, nervously biting your bottom lip. You desperately hoped that they didn’t notice how your cheeks now felt like they were on fire.

Levi raised an eyebrow, choking on the sip of tea he had taken. You noticed his ear transform into a light shade of pink. Commander Erwin held back an unmistakable chuckle, hiding his smirk behind his cup of tea. “Excuse me?” Levi asked once he finally managed to stop coughing, still unable to get himself to look you in the eye. He was sure it was a slip of the tongue, but that didn’t stop the rush of excitement coursing through his body. He had his eye on you since the first day he met you, and your slip up definitely wasn’t doing anything to help.

“A-apologies, I mean, I want to be part of the Levi squad.” You ignored his disapproving scoff. “I want to help retake wall Maria and eventually see outside of the walls.” You chewed your lip, thinking of what else to say.

His silence was growing more deafening by the second. You were suffocating in it. Any confidence you had quickly died out like a fire without oxygen. 

“You think going against the Titans once and not dying makes you qualified to be part of my squad,” he started in a condensing tone. “You’re not. I won’t make you a part of my squad so that you can go out and get yourself killed.” He didn’t what’d he do if you were to get hurt while being in his squad. Or even worse, he didn’t know how he’d react to having you so close. So he did the best thing for both of you: deny your place on the team.

“Then let me show you why I am qualified,” You interject, finally rediscovering your fight. Did he not remember how you took down the titan when you first met? Sure, you needed assistance, but only because you were out of gas. “Only thing that’ll kill me are natural causes, and I don’t consider those ugly bastards to be a natural cause. I’m going to help reclaim wall Maria even if I’m not a part of your squad.” You nodded at the commander out of respect before taking off back to your seat.

You plopped down in between Connie and Armin once again with an irritated huff. He was so cold, yet you still found yourself wanting more. Maybe that’s what really irritated you about the situation. 

“Take it your talk didn’t go well,” Armin asked sympathetically, cutting into your thoughts.

“Of course not; what’d you think you were doing just walking up to them like that,” Jean scolded you. You could hear the mixture of relief and triumph in his voice, but you said nothing about it.

“Well—” Sasha began as she stuffed her face with whatever food she had leftover, “— she’s not entirely wrong. They are just people. Scary, intimidating, and powerful, but still people.”

“Whatever you said clearly got their attention. Captain Levi has been staring at you since you left,” Mikasa said curtly, silencing any bickering among our group. 

All eyes found themselves on Levi, who carried on his conversation with Erwin. They looked back and forth between you and the captain, trying to piece together what they missed. Eventually, one by one, they lost interest, turning around to focus on their food or whatever new conversation they could create. Even then, his gaze never left yours- watching you through every nod, reply, or sips of tea. You were the first to break the staring contest, jumping back into conversations like nothing happened. 

It became a routine of sorts. You’d spend your days’ training with the others, doing your best to push Levi out of your mind long enough to focus on being the best in each exercise. Each night for the next couple of weeks, you would bring him a cup of tea during dinner. No words were ever exchanged, just stares and a cup. He never even said a thank you, not that you ever really expected one. 

“Why do you keep giving him drinks?” Eren looked at you with genuine curiosity as you prepared to give a cup of tea to Levi. 

You shrugged, unable to think of a real reason why. He never asked for it, thanked you for it, and he barely even acknowledged you for it. Yet you still gave him a cup of tea everyday. You stared at the cup in your hand. The warmth it provided was nothing compared to the warm feeling Levi caused inside of you. Maybe that was the answer. Or perhaps it was to help him look a little less tired. “Guess it’s one of life’s strange mysteries.” You shot Eren a half-hearted smile before getting up and walking over to Levi.

He was seated with the other captains, the four of them speaking in hushed voices despite the room being full of chatter. You had half a mind to turn around out of respect, but you were already close enough for Hange to notice you as they glanced up at the room. 

You probably could’ve still turned around since Levi hadn’t noticed yet. Instead, you hesitantly carried on, keeping your head down. Set the cup down and keep it moving. That was the plan. For once, you wanted to keep my head down, but that plan flew out the window as you felt his fingers brush against yours. You held the side of the cup since you had picked up that Levi only held his cups from above, but there he was. You looked up at him with a hitched breath, completely forgetting the other captains were there. The half-smirk on his face and his fingers still on top of yours made it hard to think, move, or even stand. He looked at you from the corner of his eye and let out a quiet pleased sound at your reaction.

You shared a quick knowing look at each other that didn’t go unnoticed by Hange before Levi moved his hand so you could leave. Hange waited until you and the other captains had walked off, quietly plotting the whole time. “So, you and one of the recruits huh,” Hange asked vaguely. Their eyes were wide with their typical borderline crazy look. Levi’s shrug told them everything they needed to know. This was a rare moment to be treasured. Levi has a crush. Or at least a fixation. “Y/l/n, right? She is quite the cutie. Think I’d have a chance?” Hange noticed Levi’s frown deepen as he sent them a threatening glare. Hange burst into a fit of laughter, “I was only kidding. I wouldn’t steal your crush, I probably could, but I wouldn’t.” Hange chose to ignore the subtle way Levi’s body tensed at the word crush. “Why not go talk to the girl? Y’know, only so much can get done by just staring.” With a supportive smile, Hange walked away, leaving the dining hall. 

“Just ask him out already,” Sasha blurted out with a mouth full of bread. 

You opened my mouth to protest, but Jean spoke first, “she’s not wrong.” He sat across from you and stared at you in discontent. “It’s painfully obvious that you like the man even though you two have barely spoken a word to each other.” His blunt words dripped with venom, but the hatred never reached his eyes. He still had the same tenderness in his eyes like the first time you saw him. If anything, he was hurt more than angry. Jean slid his cup over to you and mumbled under his breath, “guess I can’t judge much, though.”

You held the cup in your hands, watching the liquid slosh around for a moment before taking a sip. “Thank you, Jeanie.” You met his gaze with a shy smile and could see his expression soften a fraction. “I mean it.”

You looked between Jean and Sasha with a confused expression as his face suddenly hardened, and Sasha gaped like a fish at what was behind you. “What?”

“Y/l/n,” a voice piped up from behind you, causing your whole body to freeze.

You looked at Sasha, quietly asking for confirmation. She nodded, her eyes still zoned in on Levi. You cautiously turned around to see Levi standing beside you. You let out a quiet squeak as you clambered to your feet. “Yes, sir, captain Levi.” You gave him a quick salute. 

Levi almost found himself smiling at your sudden formality. It was cute seeing a different side of you. He averted your gaze but quickly looked back at you when his eyes fell on Jean. He was reminded it wasn’t just you at the table. “I need to speak with you.” He didn’t wait for a response as he began heading outside.

You gave the pair an apologetic smile before running off behind the captain. You walked in silence for a while, enjoying the cool autumn breeze blowing between the both of you. “Is something the matter, captain?”

Levi shook his head but remained quiet. The look in his eyes was strangely shy, something you didn’t even know he was capable of. It was almost like he was just as nervous as you were. You pressed the thought out of your head. “T-thank you-,,” he stopped in his tracks and turned to face you, “-for all the teas. I still won’t let you join my squad.”

“I know, that’s not why I do it.” You pushed a stray strand of hair behind your ear. 

Silence enveloped you once again, giving you time to admire his features. He was gorgeous under the moonlight. The little light somehow accentuated his strong jawline to the point where it almost rivaled commander Erwin’s. His usually lackluster eyes sparkled like the stars above. 

Unbeknown to you, he was admiring you just the same. Part of him wished your hair was down again, hoping to see the way your curls frame your face. You had an untouchable innocence in your eyes, the same eyes he always found himself getting drunk off of. He stopped himself once his thoughts began to go back to his first encounter with you, reminding him of how you felt in his arms. You were right, his arm did feel at home around your waist. 

“There’s no point in having any relationship,” Levi eventually said more to himself than to you. “Either of us could die to those bastards at any moment, and I’m probably older than you think.”

You failed to hold back your giggles as a cocky smile pressed in over your lips. “I never said anything about a relationship either, captain. You came to that conclusion all on your own. Who’s to say I’m even interested? Maybe I’m just really nice.”

Levi took a challenging step closer, “You’re not.” The corners of his mouth turned up into a cocky smirk. “I wasn’t born yesterday-.”

“Oh, I know, old man,” you quipped, taking your own step forward. 

“Tch. Dumb brat, a few cups of tea isn’t going to get me to fall for you.”

You closed the small gap between you, leaving barely enough room for the wind between you. Your body yearned to be closer to the warmth that radiated from him. “All your stares say otherwise. If I didn’t know any better, I’d say you’ve liked me since we first met, captian.”

He leaned down until you could feel his breath on your lips. Every inch of his body craved you. Against his better judgment, he wrapped an arm around your waist. The air between you was electric, only helping to light every inch of your body on fire. He pulled you flush against him, relishing the feeling of having you in his arms again. It was too much like a dream to him. A dream he felt he desperately needed to wake up from. “It’s a good thing you know better.” With that, he walked away. 

You were left hanging, the cool autumn breeze feeling more like an arctic chill now. You wanted to yell or pull him back towards you, but instead, you stood there mentally throwing a fit like a child who didn’t get their way. 

You took your time getting back to your room, forcing yourself to go to sleep as soon as you sat on your bed. No matter how hard you tried, you couldn’t relax enough to fall asleep. Levi invaded your thoughts. You weren’t sure when or how, but you eventually drifted off into sleep. 

The next morning you prepped for the 57th Expedition despite the heaviness in your eyes. 

“Geez, you look dead,” Jean chuckled as he helped you up onto your horse. His hand stayed a little longer on your hip than necessary, but you chose not to say anything. He waited until you were completely situated before removing his hand. 

“Yeah, you’ve got more eye bags than captain Levi,” Connie laughed as he hopped onto his horse beside you. 

You rolled your eyes, probably closing them longer than necessary. “Shut up.” You pulled your hood over your eyes, “stop goofing off and focus on the mission. 

“Ah, Y/n, right,” an unfamiliar voice called out to you. Their footsteps quickly approached you, stopping short by the side of your horse. You looked in their direction, greeted by Hange with an eerily cheeky smile. It was like looking at a child with a secret who desperately wanted to spill. “Glad I could catch you.”

“C-captain Hange!” You quickly removed your hood with a bashful smile. “Yes, that’s right.”

Hange’s smile grew wider, causing you to glance at Connie and Jean for some sort of help. “I was told to come wake up a certain brat.” They handed you the steaming cup of tea carefully. 

You tried to hide your blush behind the cup as you drank quickly. It wasn’t the best tea you’ve ever had, but it certainly got the job done. With every sip, you could feel yourself gaining a little more energy to carry you through the day. Your mind wandered to Levi, probably already in his formation. After last night you thought he wouldn’t want to ever talk to you again, yet here he was sending you a cup of tea. You handed back the cup with a thankful smile, “guess he’s a softie after all.”

Hange laughed and shook their head, “I’ve met titans easier to understand than you two. Don’t go dying on him out there, rookie.” With that, Hange left, finding their place in the formation. 

The warmth from the tea didn’t last you long. Things quickly went to shit. It was arguably worse than the Battle of Trost. Everyone knew to wear their hoods to conceal their identities, but they didn’t know exactly why until she showed up. The female titan wiped out forces in the blink of an eye, but no retreat was called. Instead, you were ordered to perch the branches of the Titan Forest, acting as a distraction. Countless soldiers were lost, including all of Captain Levi’s squad except for Eren, before an eventual retreat was called. 

Upon arrival, the scouts were ordered to turn in Eren, but you couldn’t seem to bring yourself to care. Not when you had heard the word of Levi being injured. Your mind went into a frenzy with panic. You just needed to see him. You needed to know how badly he was injured. You needed to see for yourself he was okay. 

Without thinking, you barged into Levi’s quarters, only to run directly into Commander Erwin’s solid chest. You quickly stepped back, muttering various sorries despite the amused sound that left the commander. You didn’t waste any time making your way into the room once Erwin walked off.

“Knocking does exist, brat-” Levi was cut off by you flinging your arms around his neck. He couldn’t do this, not now. He couldn’t let himself indulge in the butterflies in his stomach or the soothing feeling of your embrace. He had just lost his entire squad, and the mission was a disaster. He didn’t have time for this right now. Levi lifted his hands to push you away but stopped short at the quiet sound of your sniffling. 

“I was- I.” You couldn’t seem to find the right words. Part of you wanted to thank him for the tea, while the other wanted to let him know how worried you were about him. You wanted to tell him that as inconsiderate as it might be, all you could do out there was hope he was still alive. Instead, you clung to Levi, your heart pouring itself out through your eyes and onto his ascot. You could feel his rigid frame slowly melting into your embrace.

Levi’s breaths grew labored as the embrace carried on. It was like he could feel all of your emotions, the grief, the relief, the guilt. He felt everything, and it mixed with his own feelings. He forced himself to muster enough strength to gently push you away by the shoulders. He wanted you to be upset, to stop this stupid display of affection that sent his heart into overtime.

“I-I told you already, dumb brat, that I don’t like you.”

“Then stop me,” you whispered with a wavering voice.You were done playing games. The vast number of comrades that were slaughtered by the female titan reminded you just how close everyone was to death. You’d be damned if you died before getting this opportunity. Slowly you closed the distance between your lips until you could feel his breath ghosting over your lips. “Tell me that cup wasn’t from you. Tell me I was alone in hoping you were safe while we were out there.” You hated how your voice was breaking with each statement. “Tell me I’m the only one who’s heart is about to leap out of their chest.” You nervously pressed your lips against his, relishing in his warmth.

Levi responded instantly, kissing you with a bruising force. Desire for you took over every thought until he yearned nothing more than to touch and be touched. He squeezes your hips possessively, pulling you flush against him. He couldn’t tell you any of those things, and you knew it. He sent you the cup at a point of weakness. Even as he fought the female titan, you managed to invade his thoughts until he had half a mind to go look for you. He wanted to protect you with the same ardor Mikasa had to protect Eren. You had somehow seen past his stoic walls, and it only fueled his hunger for you. 

Your hands fumbled with his ascot, stepping back once you set his neck free from it. You watched his eyes darken with an almost lustful look as you wrapped the piece of fabric into a bow around your ponytail. A quiet groan escaped his lips as your lips devoured his now exposed neck. Every nip and open mouth kiss made him weak in the knees, completely forgetting the dull pain in his ankle.

“You’re the only cup of tea I need.” The words fell from his kiss swollen lips before they even registered in his brain.

You broke into a bashful smile, his words stirring up a new kind of giddiness inside of you. “That was the cheesiest yet cutest thing I’ve ever heard.” You halted your assault on his neck to look up at him, “I didn’t think you had it in you. It almost puts my comment about coming close to death so you can sweep me off my feet to shame.” You pecked his lips as his usual annoyed expression returned. “Kinda sounds like you like me, Captain.”

“Get out,” Levi grumbled embarrassedly, causing you to giggle. The sound was equivalent to a clean room, filling him with a sense of pride and happiness. He could feel his ears burning as if someone was holding a flame to them. 

“Not until you tell me if I’m just any cup or your cup.”

“Relationships are pointless,” Levi answered. The look in your eye told him you weren’t going to let him rest until he gave a straight answer. “I’d like it if you were mine.”

You pressed a quick kiss to his lips, “I know. And for the record, I’d like if you were mine too,” you called over your shoulder as you walked out the door. 

You had already left the hall by the time Levi noticed you left with his ascot still tied around your ponytail. His usually private persona was pushed out the window by a sense of pride. You were his and that ascot made it clear as day.

Your new hair accessory and Levi’s suddenly missing ascot didn’t go unnoticed at dinner. Nor did the marks on Levi’s neck that Hange kept eyeing and giggling about. 

Levi could feel a smile threatening to spread across his lips as you walked with him back to his quarters after everyone left the Mess hall. You didn’t even let him go near his desk, carefully pushing him towards his bed as you fussed about him needing rest. Humanity’s strongest soldier was being babied by a brat with a big mouth and a bigger heart. 

Levi chuckled to himself as you climbed into bed with him. He hesitantly allowed you to pull him into your arms. He pressed his forehead against yours as he allowed himself to get lost in the feeling of your fingers running through his hair. He absentmindedly twirled one of your still damp curls around his finger. A comfortable silence filled the room as you both admired each other. You slid your free hand into his, lacing your fingers together. You pressed your lips to his knuckles as you came to the quiet realization that he was going to be your new reason to live. Being beside him felt like a breath of fresh air and you promised yourself you would do everything you could to hold onto him. You were going to see the world outside of the walls with him. 

He didn’t expect it, but your soothing touch lulled him into one of the best periods of sleep he’s had in years. Every time he woke up, you were still there with your hand in his. You made him think of a life outside of this normal. A life with you at his side as his wife and the mother of his children. Levi pulled you closer as he drifted back to sleep. You were going to be the death of him, and in a titan filled world, he couldn’t think of any better way to go.

[hobiwonder]

Bloom | 01

Genre: Hybrid!Namkook. fluorescence by @jincherie​ AU 

Pairing: foxhybrid!Namjoon x Reader x bunnyhybrid!Jungkook ;(

Warnings: language. mention of hybrid trafficing/being sold into sex trafficing, fluff holy shit, angst, Smut (future), very cuddly and shy jungkook, stuttery shy BOYS. I really just wrote this for me.

Words: 5k+

Summary: In a world where humanity is increasingly motivated by how much cash can be made off of... well anything, you’re a human and hybrid rights lawyer. You will do anything to save the ones that never had a choice  right from the date of their conception. Even if that means, adopting two hybrids that you absolutely did not mean to. 

a/n: hello hello im back from the dead iuhbIUHBUYBGUY okay so, yes this isnt baby baby but i am a bit behind on that so i really hope posting this instead can satiate my sluts for a few more days until i have that done. I have a lot of this written so I will post this on a semi-regular schedule. rest of the schedule i posted will stay the same. it’s just baby baby that’s kicking my BUTT!!!! Lastly, I started writing this before Goo Hara passed away. Opening this document made me a little sad and also happy when i remember Hara and her love for eco-friendly fashion. I guess, this is kind of a tribute to her? anyhow, I hope you guys like it. please please please, validate me. :>)

"Y/n they're going to be sold to this man who works for a black market. What do I do? Oh god. I-I didn't know our company was into that business."

Your best friend is nearing the point of tears and you can understand her frustration. "Listen, Hara, take a deep breath and tell me when exactly this is happening."

A deep breath is taken as you'd suggested, before you hear Hara's voice again through the phone. "Okay... Okay. I was just told by Minseok that there is an auction for the remaining two from the past failed batches. Apparently two others have been adopted and the rest have been pawned off somewhere. I'm not sure. From our division of the company, these two are the ones that have not gone for further testing to be open to the regular public. A-And so now there is a super secret auction happening tonight. It's not open to the regular public as you already know but staff members are able to attend. What do I do y/n? I can't afford them. I have my own to deal with. These poor boys will go to some horrible owner who will use them f-for god knows what."

Now Hara was crying. Openly and brokenly for the possible fate of these 'failed' hybrids that her company had produced. This was a sticky situation and even you, a Human and hybrid rights lawyer, had limited ideas as to what could be done on such a short notice. But you were not about to give up.

"Hara, don't. They will not be bought by some hybrid trafficker okay? I won't let it happen. I will... I will at least try. It's my job, remember?"

Your optimism is convincing enough. And you wholeheartedly believed that something would give. These big corporations had their toes in everywhere and you didn’t yet know if they had already had a designated buyer on the black market they pawned their hybrids off to. Where there was money to be made - no company had morals rigid enough to stop themselves from the temptation. You already lived in an age where human trafficking was no longer a cause for activism or big debates. Not when more species - man made or not - had been created to take advantage of.

“Okay yeah. You’re a badass lawyer, you must have something up your sleeve right?” Her voice is shaky but you confirm with an enthusiastic nod she can’t see.

“Of course! I’ll kick their asses. Surely this can’t be legal? No blackmarket is. Let me have a look at what can be done. I’m assuming you can bring a plus one tonight?”

“Yeah I-I was given a ticket. You’ll be coming with me right?”

“That’s why I asked, silly.” Her relieved chuckle brings a smile to your own lips.

“I’ll see you there. Don’t give up hope until I do, alright?”

“Okay... You’re right.”

_____________________________________________________________________________

“Fuck this. Fuck my life.” The curses escaped your mouth left and right as you looked over the dozens and dozens of papers splayed out on your oak desk.

Even your comfortable office chair couldn’t stop the knot building up between your shoulder blades. This was bad. Really bad. Corporate law allowed unfit materials to be sold to third parties. What these third parties did with those materials - the company of origin was no longer liable for. In short: These hybrids were going to be bought by someone sketchy with a crystal clear profile and no paper trail unless someone bid higher and bought them.

None of these bastards were rookies. They had solid paperwork where necessary and it would be near impossible to prove their illegal activities when all of them took place on the dark web. A place that opened up more threats and risks than solutions. No legislation covered hybrid rights that weren’t even registered yet. Whoever bought them would have to register them and then the hybrids would be able to receive the minimum protection they had a right to.But you can bet your father’s company that whoever bought them will never register them. Essentially these hybrids will be wiped out from the system.

Fingertips tapping against the wood, each passing minute was precious time lost. it was already 5pm. You had to leave for the dreaded auction in less than an hour and hour and yet here you sat in your chair. Hands itching to do something other than pick up the phone and tell Hara that you were at a loss. What could you do? Who would take them? You didn’t know anyone that was ready to add not one but two hybrids to their household. And ones that were not fully approved to be released. You couldn’t just lie and pawn them off to just anyone. Then you would not be any better than the company trying to get rid of them.

Sighing, you pack up the papers and documents you had initially thought would help. They were of no use anymore. All you could do was go and offer support to Hara. Or Maybe you were going because you still had hope that there would be someone who would save those hybrids. Hope was a dangerous thing for a woman like you but you had it. This was no time to wallow. So you smooth your skirt, touch up your makeup and put on your heels that had men double take.

Maybe you could scare and/or seduce these people in changing their mind?

You laugh at your absurdity, glancing in the mirror one last time before you leave with stacks of files in your hands. You could at least stall them.

_____________________________________________________________________________

“Y/n! Thank god you’re here.” I’m not so sure about that. Though you opt for a gentle smile and meet her embrace enthusiastically.

You can hear the sniffles coming from Hara who has her head buried in your shoulder. “Hey, no crying okay? No matter what happens.” The comment has her pulling back just as quickly.

“What do you mean? You have a plan for tonight r-right? Y/n..”

How could you do this? Lie to her? This was not fair on her. On anyone really. It wasn’t your fault and neither hers for whatever would happen tonight. She needed to know what to expect. As much as your heart clenched and ached to say the words you were about to; it was important to mentally prepare for the worst.

“Hara... I couldn’t find anything.” Your frown is apologetic. Trying to convey how really truly sorry you were but it doesn’t stop the tears from brewing up in her eyes.

“Oh.. I thought- thought they had a chance y/n.” You reach out for her hand, wanting to alleviate her hurt as soon as possible.

“I will at least try to see who will buy them okay? Don’t worry. We can keep an eye out on who gets them. They will be alive at least, right?” Your attempt at finding a silver lining doesn’t make her look any more reassured than you felt.

Glancing at your watch, you motion towards the building. “Come on. Let’s go before they try and kick us out.”

Hara nods, numbly leading the way towards an auditorium where several people had already taken their seats. You’re not sure how many people you were expecting, but it definitely wasn’t... this. There were at best 10 people here. All ten seemingly looked like they knew each other. This could only mean one thing. That this sale was to some degree, arranged. As in, multiple buyers were from the same company posing as separate customers to maximise their chances of acquiring the hybrids.

“Hara, have you seen any of these people before?” Your whisper has her craning her neck to have a good look at all of the men sitting in the front few rows.

“No, I don’t think so.” Her furrowed brows turn to you instead, “Do you recognise any of them?”

Shaking your head, you follow her down the stairs to sit in the row behind the last pair of buyers who were sitting.

“Whoever they are... they don’t look like they are all strangers.” Hara is gripping on to your arm when she hears you, visibly nervous once again. “I’m just speculating, okay?”

Your attempt to ease her, once again, is not enough. But you don’t try again since you don’t even believe your own words. The auctioneer however, stops you from thinking further about the impending events of the night. The man stands in a lab coat, glancing at his watch before he brings his mouth closer to the mic on the dice.

“Let’s begin gentleman... and ladies.” He seems to be surprised to see you and Hara sitting at the back. And before he begins further, he motions someone. Another man approaches the auctioneer and listens carefully as the other whispers. A few seconds later, his eyes fall back to where you sat with your best friend.

Hara’s grasp on your arm tightens once again when the man heads to your general direction. On instinct, your back straightens, posture more solid than before so as to not give anyone the wrong impression that they can mess with you unwarrantedly.

“Excuse me Miss.?”

“Yes?” Your curt reply surprises him but he recovers fast, glancing towards Hara before talking to you again.

“Are you a guest of Ms. Hara?”

“Obviously.” Your unwavering gaze visibly unnerves him. It was obvious to anyone there but you had an idea this was some sort of test.

“May I see your ticket please?” His bogus smile annoys you more than it should. Nonetheless, Hara is fishing out the ticket from her purse and showing the man. He inspects it longer than he should and finally walks back to the auctioneer to let him know you had the right to be here.

“Who would do that if they weren’t running a hoax?” You ask Hara before you can stop yourself.

“Alright. Apologies for the delay. We will now begin. As you are all aware, we are auctioning two of our very elite hybrids from a rare batch. They have not progressed to the next stage of screenings and tests due to some technical difficulties. Thus, we are here to give them a chance at a new home rather than a painful end.” He looks in the audience for effect. Euthanasia is what he meant.

“These hybrids are fully functional however lack a few abilities they were initially designed for. Due to these technical issues deeming them failed to proceed, they are available for purchase at a much lower cost than what they are sold for on the market.” The auctioneer looks so smug the urge to smack his across the face is almost irresistible.

“Right, bring them out Wonho.” Everyone is watching carefully, waiting for the ‘failed’ hybrids and you don’t know what you were expecting.

Not what you see though. Definitely not. Because the two - tall - hybrids entering the stage are not what you expect. Peach and silver tones greet your eyes as well as incredibly sculpted faces.  The peach haired hybrid seems to cling to the silver haired one. The man leading the two hybrids seems to be frustrated with their slow pace, giving the peach haired hybrid a little shove and there is only so much you can do to not yell at the top of your lungs for him to get his hands off of them.

The man sighs, letting the two hybrids to just stand in the middle when the peach haired one does not stand apart from the other hybrid. While the shorter of the two hybrids - and much, much shyer - looks around anxiously at the people in the auditorium, the silver haired one has his features set in stone. His eyes don’t look alarmed, they don’t seem scared. He just looks numb. He stares ahead at the people sitting in front of him while the peach haired boy visibly shakes, breathing fast and eyes flitting across every surface. He takes a step back, hiding part of his body behind his silver haired companion for comfort.

“There you have them. The peach haired specimen is a Oryctolagus cuniculus or - a bunny in more simplistic terms. The silver haired specimen is an arctic fox, Vulpes lagopus. Both hybrids are off a rare species and very sought after on the market. Due to technical issues, once again, unfortunately, we are only able to sell them in a pair. They are useless on their own.”

The candid way the auctioneer speaks of them has your blood boiling. But what gets you more is the laughter that sounds in the auditorium. Did these assholes think they were funny? The hybrids - entirely human or not - were present in the room with them. Did they not have any ounce of respect for them? Hara was not faring any better. Watching with a frown as chatter continued among the buyers. The bunny looked even more disturbed, looking around at every man in the front few rows - before his eyes landed on you.

The gasp that leaves you is abrupt. His pained expression holds your gaze, eyes wide and chest heaving. The bunny jumps when the auctioneer speaks again.

“We will now start the bid at $1000. $1200 anyone?” Several hands go up before the auctioneer raises the price to $1400.

Bald, greasy men exchanging glances and crude remarks as they talk amongst themselves. Your heart is thumping, your blood thinning. With each passing second, your throat seems to be closing up. There was nothing you could do to save them, was there? The further the price went up, the more panicked and distraught the bunny looked, gripping his fox companion harder, hiding behind him even more. The silver haired fox looked much like what you had stopped Hara from looking only this morning. Hopeless. His mouth was set in a thin line - just taking in the scenario in front of him. It was obvious he saw his fate before his very eyes and instead of futilely hoping that someone would save them - he stares his aggressors in the eyes.

“Brilliant! We’re at $3000 for the gentleman in the first row. Anyone for $3500?” The said man looked positively smug, sitting with his legs spread lewdly. Most likely sure that no one would contest that price.

Definitely not you.

“$4000.” Your voice yelling above everyone else is even foreign to your own ears. An outer body experience as you watch yourself look the auctioneer straight in his eyes, daring anyone in the room to go higher up on the price. But most of all, you watch the silver haired hybrid’s gaze waver for the first time - looking at you in such surprise like it was the first time he was noticing you.

“Ah... Anyone for $4500?” Only one other hand goes up. The man that had been the prospective buyer before. His face is ballooning with the amount of blood that’s rushing to it.

“Y/n? What are you doin?!” Hara’s frantic whispering flies over your head as you call out once more.

“$6000. Final offer.” You look at the other men in the seats beneath you, challenging them to dispute your offer.

The atmosphere is tense, thick with the tension brewing inside the auditorium and yet you don’t shy away from the angry glares being shot your way. A minute passes. No more offers.

“Sold to Miss?”

“Y/n.”

“-Miss Y/n. Thank you all for participating.” The loud chatter is instantaneous as the auctioneer motions the other lab rat to, assumably, gather the hybrids and their things.

“Y/N! Oh my god.” Hara has all but engulfed you in a tight hug once more. Shaking you slightly out of your own shock. This was not what you had planned but it was done.

She finally pulls back, checking you over like you were ill. “A-Are you sure about this? Oh god, okay we need to head up to the podium.”

Just like she doesn’t wait for your answer, you had not waited for your own either. You hadn’t even asked yourself the question before you had so blindly bid on the two hybrids. You’d been waiting for someone to save them. Someone to come barging in and take them away from these cruel people. Never in a millenia had you thought that someone might be you.

“Here you are Miss. You can deposit a check right now or eftpos the payment. Up to you.”

Benumbed, you take out your phone to open the phone banking application. When you’ve made sure there are sufficient funds transferred from your savings account, you wave your card in front of the auctioneer wordlessly. From the corner of your eyes, you can feel the two hybrids watching you. You wished they had at least let them wait in some sort of waiting room and not witness the jarring experience of several people bidding over them.

“Excellent! The transaction has been approved and a receipt will be emailed to you if you can fill out this form here.” Glancing at the hybrids standing a few feet away from you, clutching a duffle bag each, you try and put down your details as fast as you can.

They had already looked like they wanted to be as farther away from this place as possible and the feeling was mutual. Hara was beside you the whole time, waiting for any cue from you to provide some sort of support or whatever you needed her to do. And if your tongue worked - you would thank her as you filled out the space on the form asking you of your email address. It was sickening how easy it was for you to just... buy them! Would they not do a security or police check on you? Make sure that these hybrids are going to at least a safe home?

You were aware of the long process of hybrids that were ordered from the company. The company had a thorough process of making sure their clients were reputable and trust-worthy. That they wouldn’t do bodily harm to the hybrids but that was a facade so these companies wouldn’t have to spend money in compensation if a client had abused their hybrid in any way and had not been satisfied with what they had ordered. It was a guise. These people didn’t give two shits if the hybrids were not of expectation and couldn’t make them money.

“Am I done here?” Your tone was curt and the auctioneer could sense it.

The fact that you’d fished out more than enough cash for some ‘failed’ hybrids - he was interested in you as a potential future client. You were aware that hybrids of their breed went for $5000 - maximum. The previous greasy bald man had been close to closing a deal for $3000 until you had butted in. So obviously, they were going to kiss your ass.

“Yes Ma’am. That’s all we needed. The hybrids are good to go. Their bags have their guidebooks with them. Thank you for shopping with us.” his bright smile makes you want to hit him with your designer bag.

But even this leather was too good to be wasted on these assholes. “Y/N? Please look a little more friendly. You’ll scare the bunny away.” Hara is speed walking besides you, trying to convince you to soften your stance when you stop right before the bench they had been sitting on.

“Follow me, boys.” You’re not rude. You don’t sound mean either. But you don’t particularly sound like you wanted them. And as much as that was the truth to some degree, you didn’t not want them.

The silver haired hybrid hesitates - watching you with wide, curious eyes. Not the harsh way his eyes had scanned the room before but not exactly friendly and enthusiastic like the bunny. The bunny that was currently tugging on the silver fox’s sleeve wordlessly. His doe eyes silently ask his friend to follow you. But when his feet stay rooted to the same spot, you can’t help but sigh.

“Is there a problem?” A moment’s silence. Then finally the silver haired boy shakes his head, grasping the bunny’s hand and follows you out of the building.

Hara is gripping your hand, relieved tears in her eyes and you can’t keep looking. Because you couldn’t promise her that you would take good care of them. “Thank you Y/n. You didn’t have to do that but... but you did. You’re a good person and these boys are lucky to have you.”

Her eyes are earnest. You know she means every word and she can sense your inner turmoil at your own ability to take care of them. The boys can’t hear you both talking since they are standing near your car, obediently waiting for you. Taking a look at them huddled in the back seat, you turn back to Hara.

“Thanks Har. I will try my best. They deserve a shot at a normal and secure life. I won’t let you down.”

“And you,” she cups your face, making you look back at her. “You deserve love too. I have seen the bunny hybrid in the lab. He will heal all your wounds too. Please be happy and patient with them, okay?”

You nod, a smile that doesn’t quite reach your eyes but genuine nonetheless. “I’ll see you later. Love you.”

You just wave her goodbye, standing until her car pulls away. Looking back at the two boys waiting patiently in the car - you take a moment to gather yourself.

“Fuck... fuck. Fuck!” You don’t scream out loud. not really. But anyone walking by would be able to see you were stalling something. That something is going to your car and then going home.

Taking a deep breath, you decide to bite the bullet and face the reality. Getting in the driver’s seat, you look back at the two hybrids watching you from your rearview mirror. Giving them a small smile, you notice the bunny hybrid’s shoulders relax a little.

“Let’s go home.” Your voice is light and airy. Hoping to put them at ease. They were yours now.

You were their saviour.

_____________________________________________________________________________

“Home sweet home.” Letting them pass you, entering the condo, you let them take in their surroundings.

The bunny is still latched on to the taller hybrid’s flannel, hiding behind him when the fox hybrid comes to stand beside a couch. Both of them look at you - as if waiting for you to allow them to sit. The silver haired fox is holding on to the bunny’s hand, watching you with a dour look.

“Go on.” You head motions towards the comfortable three seater couch. “Have a seat. No need to be shy.”

Of course, you want to palm yourself after your remark. Of course they were shy. Well, the bunny mostly. The fox looked to be very suspicious and not exactly friendly. Though you could understand his apprehension. He was about to be sold to some very nefarious people. He seemed to be a bit older than the bunny and had a look of ambiance that only came with experiencing harsh times. Your heart felt for him.

The bunny doesn’t wait too long, sitting on the couch - well plopping is more like it - whereas the fox takes his time, battling with himself if he should or not. When you keep watching him, waiting for him to sit, he thankfully gives in and sits besides his friend.

Once you can tell that they are comfortable - as comfortable as they can be, you ask your first question. “So, what are your names?”

You smile at them gently, letting them know you are their friend. At least hoping that they can conclude that from the fact that you told them about their new home on the car ride over.

The bunny’s eyes are wide, face heating up as if you asked him a rather scandalous question and not just his name. Your heart skips a beat when the lovely blush blossoms across his face that’s hiding in the fox’s shoulder.

“Well? Can you tell me, bun? What’s your name?” Your question being directed to the bunny only makes the blush more visible. You could see his face reddening further in embarrassment and the colour being rather more visible on his neck too.

The smile doesn’t diminish from your face. Not even after seeing the way the fox is almost glaring at you but you were positive that the bunny wasn’t hiding because he was afraid of you.

“J-Jungkook. ‘m J-Jungk-kook” The answer proves to be too much for him to mumble, lips catching his plumper bottom lip as he peeks at you through one eye that isn’t hidden in the fox’s shoulder.

“Jungkook. That’s a lovely name, bun.” Your smile widens when you see the corners of his mouth stirring up a little at your compliment.

Your heart was so full. Never did you think you would feel these dizzying emotions at a pretty boy merely muttering his name. His name. If this was your reaction at finding out one of their names, you were not going to survive getting to know them before you went full mother-hen mode on anyone that tried to harm them.

“What about you, hm?” Your smile is a lingering effect of just looking at Jungkook’s adorable blushing face and you don’t let it falter even if the fox hybrid is visibly more aloof.

‘Be patient with them y/n.’ You remind yourself of Hara’s words over and over.

“Namjoon.” The smile halts briefly at the deep timbre of his tone. You had not been expecting him to sound like molten chocolate and sweeter than honey. You realise you wanted to hear him more. Hear him speak about mundane topics over and over because that’s how good he sounded to you.

“Namjoon.” the name rolls off your tongue smoothly, just like his voice. You’re still watching his face, waiting for any sort of reaction even if it’s not as endearing as Jungkook’s. Just something. But his face remains passive. A slight twitch of his lips but that’s it. The pessimistic part of your brain convinces you that it could have been a frown and not a smile that he’s fought away.

But you needed to remain positive.

“T-That’s… a very nice name too.” He doesn’t look convinced at your reply though. Namjoon continues to watch you and now you’re the one blushing from the heat of his stare.

Jungkook is watching Namjoon just as cautiously as you. Like he expected him to be like that. Austere and unwilling to be forthcoming with information about himself. Telling yourself that he’ll adjust with time, you opt for a smile that’s sent Jungkook’s way - making the bunny hide behind Namjoon again. Almost like when a child is cautious and shys away from a stranger they meet. That’s what it was.  A childlike innocence to Jungkook which awoke every instinct in you to protect him. Maybe that’s why his eyes had convinced you that you needed to take them home with you.

“Okay boys. I’ll show you to your rooms.” Furrowing your brows at the way Jungkook clutches Namjoon harder with panicked eyes, you turn around to look at them again.

“You don’t need to stay in separate rooms if you don’t want to, okay?” Namjoon regards you with a look before nodding - eyes cast down once again.

“Good. You both are very quiet but that’s okay - I can talk enough for the three of us.” The wink that you send Jungkook’s way only has him sputtering with embarrassment as the lovely rose tints his full round cheeks.

“But you do have to tell me when you are not okay with something, alright? I can’t read your pretty little heads.” As you say the last few words, your hand reaches out to shuffle the bunny’s peach hair.

What you don’t expect, is him flinching away so violently that even you are startled, taking a step back. Jungkook is hiding behind Namjoon completely now, shaking and you want to reach out. Say sorry and take it all back.

“I’m… I’m so sorry. I didn’t-”

“Hey, kook, it’s alright. It’s okay.” Namjoon’s voice reverberates through the quiet hallway, soothing the bunny’s shaking frame, whispering gentle assurances and you’re about to choke up.

What happened to him? Who did this to him. For him to be this scared. Watching Namjoon hug the shaking bunny tightly, sniffling away in his chest, only makes you feel more guilty at your brash treatment. Were you coming on too strong? God you were so out of your depth.

“I didn’t mean to scare you Jungkook. Honey..” You’re trying your best to reach out to him but the way Namjoon stands between you and him like a wall - it’s obvious he was waiting for something like this to happen. He was cautious of you and now his beliefs have been reinforced to not trust you or whatever nonsense he’s thinking.

You couldn’t blame him though. You really couldn’t.

“Please be careful, miss. He’s not a toy.” Namjoon’s voice trembles. Just the way - you now notice - his bottom lip does. He’s holding back tears and you really don’t know what to do. Except try your best to take their pain away.

“I’m.. I’m really sorry Namjoon. I didn’t mean to upset him.” You open the door to the room quickly, making sure there are blankets and pillows on the bed before coming out to tell them.

“Take him inside Namjoon. I’ll… I’ll leave you two alone, for now. Let me know if you need anything?” Namjoon merely nods, not being able to look you in the eyes but the bite of his lip tells you he’s trying to hold it together.

Jungkook’s hiccups catch your attention and you pull yourself out of your self-pity session. Only wanting to make sure that both of the hybrids are comfortable and just not feeling the way they are right now. Gesturing your head forward again, you nod at Namjoon when he looks at you one last time before heading into the room. The bunny holds onto Namjoon tightly, letting him walk into the room and when they are fully in - you close the door behind them. Giving them their privacy and also because you had a feeling they needed to be by themselves to really understand their current situation. That you were their new owner and this was their home.

A permanent home.

[carelessannie]

maybe it goes like this: tony courts peter (part 8)

Chapter One | Chapter Two | Chapter Three | Chapter Four | Chapter Five | Chapter Six | Chapter Seven | Chapter Eight | Chapter Nine | Chapter Ten | Epilogue

Read on A03

Read the Stuckony backstory

Word count: 10.1K

Starker, WinterSpider, SpiderShield, Peter x Clint x OFC

Peter’s POV -> it’s been a rough semester, and pack related stress isn’t making anything easier. Maybe a packmate (or the whole pack) can help him out?

Major warnings: D/S Au, A/B/O Au, explicit d/s abo smut, femdom, edging, face-sitting, come eating, uhhh light CBT and hair pulling, light bondage, subdrop, and non-apologetic long discussions of sex-ed

---

Maybe it goes like this:

There’s only a few weeks until finals, and of course this is when the pack has decided to move forward with officially mating and bonding. It’s not like Peter wants to postpone it, per se— it’s just, there’s so many steps involved with combining packs, and Peter can’t deal with dividing his attention between home and school.

And the lab. Dammit.

Until the end of their lease, his pack is living at their apartment during the week and at Tony’s place over the weekend. The whole upstairs of their house was built with bedroom suites, so each of them not only get a room of their own, but they have also built a makeshift nest upstairs that’s separate from Bucky’s nest downstairs. It’s been an easy transition this way— taking claim of a part of Tony’s home before a more intimate bond takes place— but Peter feels more and more stressed out as the weeks pass.

Currently, he’s staring at a screen in the lab, failing to comprehend any of the information in front of him. Over winter break, Peter was moved to a permanent position in a lab away from Tony. Pepper had insisted on it since they started getting serious, and Peter agreed. It was unprofessional to do that much cuddling at work.

The one downside now is that work has become mind-numbingly boring for most of the day. After this semester, Peter can transfer back to working in chemical engineering, or mechanics. Or even robotics. And after spending the last few months in software development and computer science, Peter is so ready for the change.

He checks the clock for the third time in the last five minutes. Still four o’clock. Still the same information in front of him.

If he squints hard enough, the code on his computer looks like Hieroglyphics.

“To- neeeey,” he whines, turning fully to face the Beta, “thank god, I’m dying. I can’t go on.”

There are a few snickers from other scientists in the lab, but Peter could care less as he watches Tony’s face crumble, “Oh sweet baby, come here,” and he opens his arms, pulling Peter in for a hug.

It only lasts a few moments, but Peter absorbs as much of Tony’s scent as he can while the Beta rocks him back and forth, stroking down his back and kissing whispered reassurances into his hair. He holds onto Tony’s tie, using it as leverage to stand up and nose around his collarbone.

Tony laughs and murmurs, “That tickles, Pete,” but Peter ignores him, dotting small kisses up the side up his neck until he can smell HappyArousedCalm coming off of his Beta.

There’s a hitch in Tony’s breath after Peter nibbles on his pulse point, “Need something from me, Omega?”

Peter hums, even as Tony pulls away slightly, “Yes, Beta,” he pauses as Tony tilts his head expectantly, “I need you to take me home.”

Peter hums, even as Tony pulls away slightly, “Yes, Beta,” he pauses as Tony tilts his head expectantly, “I need you to take me home.”

He watches Tony laugh, stepping back and looping an arm over Peter’s shoulders, before calling out to the room, vaguely, “Whoever’s in charge here, I’m taking him home. Because I’m actually in charge here. Okay— have a good weekend, goodbye.”

He’s towed away, barely sparing a second to grab his phone and shut down his station. They practically run out of the building— holding hands and laughing wildly as they throw their jackets into the back of Tony’s car and jump in the front seats.

“So— what are we doing with the long weekend, Tony?”

Tony starts the car, pulling out into the city, “I thought we’d go out for dinner and spend the evening in with our pack— how does that sound?”

“ Ooo,” Peter claps his hands, “that sounds perfect, Tony, oh my goodness. What do you have in mind?”

“How does seafood sound? I have a place I’ve been dying to take you.”

Peter turns, grabbing his boyfriend’s arm, “Where? Tony, where are we going?”

“Nope, not this time,” Tony shakes his head, weak, “it’s gonna be a surprise, dammit.”

“I’ll get it out of you— no secret is safe around me, Tony Stark.”

He winks and blows a kiss when Tony looks over, and the man looks terrified. Peter laughs, pulling a pair of sunglasses out of the center console and reclining back in the seat. It’s a little chilly still in early April, but the change of season means more sun, and the Omega is happy to roll up his dress shirt sleeves and bask in it like a pampered cat.

The drive passes comfortably and Peter adores sitting next to his handsome Beta— the whole world seeing that Tony is spoken for and claimed by the young Omega on his arm. Peter never thought he’d want to be a trophy Omega— and, technically, he isn’t— but something about being pampered and loved by the most powerful man in New York City has him preening where he sits.

He’s thankful the windows are down, or Tony would be able to smell it on him.

They pull around 59th and up to the curb across from Central Park. Tony exits the driver’s side, throws his keys to a waiting driver, and rounds the car to open Peter’s door. He steps out and grabs their jackets from the back seat, handing over Tony’s as the two of them link arms and hop onto the sidewalk.

“Where to, Tony?” he blinks up at his date, smiling innocently.

Tony hums, distracted, “Marea, just through the—”

“— Aha! —”

“— dammit! No! That doesn’t count!”

“Yes it does! I win,” Peter skips forward, doing a little dance in victory.

He feels Tony catch him around the waist, nuzzling into his neck, and knows the Beta is enjoying his HappyOmega scent. The two of them joke and tease for the rest of the walk into the restaurant, but Peter notices something as they walk through the door to be seated.

“Uh, Tony?”

“Yeah, Pete?”

“Where is everyone?” he asks, gesturing around the empty room.

Tony looks around and gives him a suspiciously innocent face, “Well... they may not be open, officially, for another hour.”

He tries to pull them further into the room, but Peter is frozen— speechless.

“Don’t give me that look, baby, I made some calls today and everything’s set, I’m paying for the extra hour, the service and the meals—”

“Tony,”

“— and even extra for the inconvenience, okay? I just wanted to treat you—”

Peter grabs his shirt collar, shutting him up with a kiss. Tony inhales against Peter’s lips and immediately takes control, snaking his hands up into Peter’s hair and pulling gently, tipping his head back to deepen the kiss. Their lips move together, perfectly synchronized, and Peter opens his mouth in an invitation. Tony just chuckles— briefly licking underneath his upper lip before pulling away and looking at Peter with a mixture of awe and amusement.

“You never have to justify treating me, Tony. I feel so special when you do,” Peter reaches up to brush his fingers through Tony’s short hair, feeling safe and warm in his hold.

The older man just grins, eyes bright, and leads them to their seats. Right in the center of the Ravello Room, their table has been set and lit with candles— a bottle of wine is chilling in an ice bath, and the maître d' stands nearby, greeting them and explaining the menu for the afternoon.

When she walks away, Tony reaches over and grabs Peter’s hand. They sit like this through the first two courses, and Peter’s content to share each of them with Tony, even if that means being basically hand fed by his boyfriend.

And it’s pretty hard to hand feed someone oysters.

The food is incredible, though, and their conversation is even better. Peter tries not to complain about work and school, but even when he inevitably does, Tony is patient and listens. He asks questions when necessary, and they even work through a few solutions to tougher problems together.

“I guess... I wish a few of the things with our pack were more definite,” Peter picks at his meal, separating the shrimp from the pasta.

“What do you mean, baby?” Tony asks, reaching over to steal a piece of shrimp.

Peter tries to defend his plate, jabbing at Tony’s hand with his fork, but misses. His pout deepens, “I dunno. I wish it wasn’t still up in the air who’s going to bond. I wish I knew how synchronizing goes, with our heats. I wish there was more communication about sex, and scenes, and who’s comfortable with what. I wish I knew the timeline,” he shakes his head, finally putting his fork down, “I don’t know, Tony, it just feels so out of control most of the time, I don’t know how to handle it.”

“I don’t think you can control it, sweetheart. There are six different people in this pack, and fifteen different individual relationships. Plus, two unique pack dynamics that need to merge. It’s uncomfortable, Petey, and it’s gonna take time.”

“I know that, Tony, it’s just… I’m supposed to be the center of this pack, and some days I don’t even know if you want to bond with me, so how—”

“I do.”

“— am I… what?”

“I do want to bond with you. God, I want nothing more in the world,” Tony reaches up to cup his cheek, “I can’t believe you doubted that, Peter. You know I love you, right?”

“I… I don’t…”

Tony’s eyes start to tear up, and he looks absolutely devastated, “I’m so sorry, baby. Dammit— I love you. I am completely gone on you. Every day I have to stop myself from keeping you all to myself; running away and starting a familial pack, just the two of us. There are so many steps: mating and bonding and collaring and marrying, and Peter— I want them all with you.”

Peter’s vision is blurry, tears falling freely as he frantically tries to wipe them away, “Tony, I— I had no idea. You never… we didn’t… I just assumed that we were getting there, you know? I’ve never been in love before, Tony—”

“It’s okay, Peter, you don’t have to—”

“— but I am in love with you. God, we’re stupid, aren’t we?” both of them laugh, wet and joyful, “everything’s just so confusing right now.”

“I know, baby, I know,” Tony coos, pulling on Peter’s wrist until he’s up, out of his seat, and moving to sit across Tony’s lap. He loves that when he sits like this and curls up, his head fits perfectly under Tony’s chin, and his mate’s arms wrap soundly around his waist.

“Da— Tony,” Peter whines, barely catching the slip up— not time for that conversation yet, Pete— as Tony holds him tighter.

“Need me to help you, baby?” Tony murmurs right next to his ear, making him shiver, “you know, you don’t have to do it all alone.”

“I know— Steve is supposed to help—”

“Not just Steve,” Tony grips his arms, looking him in the eye, “all of us. Especially me. I want to help you. Will you let me?”

It’s a heavy question, Peter knows. He knows that he needs help— but trusting someone else to do the work and do it right… only Clint, Annie and May are close enough for that. And barely so. It takes a lot for Peter to trust, it’s uncomfortable. But if he claims to love Tony—

“Yes, Beta. I need— I need your help.”

The restaurant around them is forgotten as Tony whispers, “Good boy,” and Peter starts to float, only tethered down by the warmth of his mate’s arms, the scent of Cinnamon and smoky Bonfires holding him together.

“Eat this, baby,” and he opens his mouth, biting down obediently. It’s chocolatey and creamy and crunchy— he has to focus on chewing, and Tony’s fingers around his mouth and on his arms are helping to pull him back up. “Stay up for me, Peter. I’m gonna talk and then we’ll have a conversation, baby.”

Peter finds himself switching focus between eating the dessert and following Tony’s story about… his mom? And a secret hideout?

“— mom could never find me, but, I don’t know, I don’t think she ever tried, you know? It wasn’t that hard to find.”

“She probably knew and just wanted you to have a place to yourself,” Peter mumbles into Tony’s neck.

Tony pulls him away, holding him at arm’s length and looking into his eyes for a long moment.

“You up, Pete? Ready to talk?” he asks, and Peter nods, moving to get off Tony’s lap. The older Beta lets him, and Tony stands up to move their chairs closer together. When Peter sits down, Tony immediately takes his hand and continues eating like nothing happened.

“Okay— I’m gonna start. First, we need to talk about your pack Pete. I know Bucky’s gonna want to bond with everyone, he’s told me as much, but especially you and Annie need to decide who you’re bonding with. Have you talked to Steve at all about it?”

“Yes, we’ve been going on dates, and... everything is so natural with Steve, which I guess makes sense since we’re so compatible,” he pauses, thoughtful, “I think I want to bond with everyone, too. I can’t speak for Annie, but I think you and Steve are the only ones who she’s hesitant about.”

“I get that. Have the three of you talked about going to the O clinic?”

Peter gives an affirmative hum, “Yes, but Tony… I don’t think Bucky’s ever been. I mentioned going together, and he looked so confused.”

“Yeah, that sounds about right.” Tony chuckles to himself, eating the last bit of his mousse and wiping his mouth with a napkin, “I’ve never seen him go to an Omega doctor… I think he’s had a semi-permanent suppressant implant since he presented.”

“Well, yes. I do, too, but hasn’t he been sexually active with multiple partners for like… years? You’re saying he’s never had a pregnancy scare? Never had an internal exam or pap—”

“Uh… I don’t—”

“What about an STD test, Tony? Have any of you guys ever been tested? I swear, what on earth were you doing before us—”

“Okay, okay— to be fair, it’s worked so far. And Steve makes us all go to our primary care and the dentist once a year. It’s like… hell week. When all of us have appointments.”

Peter buries his face in his arms, groaning at the utter idiocy of his future bondmates, “Thank god I met you, Tony. You guys are worse than Clint,” he laughs a little bit, picking up his head and glancing over at his properly chastised boyfriend.

Reaching out, he gives Tony a boop on the nose, startling him out of his sad expression, “I’ll talk to Bucky, okay? Annie and I are going to the O clinic next week, and we’ll help him make an appointment. They’re flexible about pack stuff, I think. And… I guess we’ll talk to the doctor about the steps we need to take to bond.”

Tony makes a flicking motion with his hand, and Peter sees the maître d' walk across the room and silently collect the black card Tony hands her.

“Sounds good. Let’s talk about the rest on the way back, okay? I’m gonna call Steve and see if he wants us to pick them up anything to eat.”

While Tony makes the call, Peter thinks through a few of the questions he has. He’s thankful for their overall dynamic and compatibility, but there are so many variables and unspoken limits—

“Tony?” Peter tries to interrupt, tapping on his arm, “hey, Tony? Can I talk to Steve?”

“Yeah, hold on,” Tony responds, turning back to the call, “yeah, Steve? Peter wants to talk to you… okay, okay here he is,” Tony hands over the phone with a brief, “here ya go, baby.”

“Hey, Steve?”

“Hi sweetheart! What’s going on?” Steve sounds like he’s in the car, probably heading home from work.

Peter glances at Tony’s questioning expression before answering Steve, “Nothing bad, Alpha, no worries,” he ducks his head, a little embarrassed at his small smile. The low rumbly voice hasn’t failed to affect him yet, “I’m wondering if we could have a talk tonight. You know, as a pack.”

“Of course, Peter. What do you want to talk about?”

“I think we need to discuss sex,” Peter says, bluntly, and has to keep himself from laughing as Tony’s eyes almost pop out of his head, “specifically, we need to talk about scenes and dynamics— especially before everyone bonds this summer.”

He hears Steve clear his throat before responding, “O— okay, sweetheart. We can do that. Do you feel comfortable leading this conversation tonight?”

“Yes, Alpha, I’d like that.”

“Okay, thank you for bringing this up, Peter. Bucky mentioned something similar this week, but I just haven’t thought too much about it. You’re stepping into this role so beautifully, Peter, and I’m constantly awed by you.”

“Oh— well...” Peter feels his face flame red, and he puts a hand up to hide from Tony, “th— thank you, Alpha.”

Steve laughs— a low, rumbling sound even over the phone, “You deserve it, sweet Omega. Let me talk to Tony, and I’ll see you tonight.”

Peter mumbles his goodbye and basically throws the phone back to Tony, who takes it with a curious look, “What did you say to him, Alpha? He smells so sweet… oh, really? Mhm… I know he is, he’s my soulmate, Steve…”

After that, Peter tunes out the conversation and hides his face in his hands. These doms are really trying to kill him with the constant praise. They haven’t even had a proper scene together— he hasn’t even kissed Steve, for goodness sake— and they are already onto the things that make him tick. Is he really that transparent?

On the way back home, Tony stops briefly to pick up a take-out order of Chinese food. They don’t talk about the pack again— but it’s okay. Peter feels like everything that needs to be said will be brought up tonight.

---

One of his favorite things about their combined pack is spending evenings together. All six packmates sit in the living room, eating take-out and sharing quiet conversation. Every so often, an innocent argument will break out— usually between Tony and Clint— and the volume level will raise. But for the most part, all of them are content to touch, and eat, and snuggle in close stillness.

“Did Bucky pick out these couches?” Annie asks, sitting on the loveseat with Steve while the other four packmates squish together on the larger couch. She keeps grabbing his muscles, and Peter can tell their Alpha loves showing off for the pretty Omega.

Bucky is sitting on the floor, leaning back in between Tony’s legs. Both Betas have an arm around Peter, and he sits in the middle of them on the couch, reaching over every so often to play with Bucky’s hair.

The question makes Bucky look up, jostling the couch behind him and almost overturning Clint’s bowl.

Tony answers first, “Kind of. We all picked out the furniture together, but Bucky did have the final say.”

“Damn right I did,” Bucky says around a mouthful of noodles, “gotta be comfy for the whole pack. Tony wanted these ugly leather things,”

“Hey! They were tasteful—”

“— I’d rather sit on a concrete slab, Tony, they were so bad—”

“Steve, you liked the leather couches, right?” Tony tries to get the Alpha’s support,

“Uh,” Steve looks between his packmates, “I liked them until Bucky vetoed.”

Bucky lets out a whoop! in victory, and both Clint and Annie dissolve into laughter as Tony sinks back into the couch, pulling Peter in close for comfort.

Tony turns to Peter, “You like my couches, don’t you, baby?”

Shifting to face the Beta, Peter makes a small cooing noise while reaching up to stroke his hair, “I love you, Tony— but I’m on Bucky’s side. I like these ones.”

With a gasp, Tony practically dumps Peter off the couch, “Betrayal! My own mate betrays me!”

Bucky finishes pulling him off the couch, hauling the smaller Omega into his lap with a greasy kiss on the cheek. Peter can’t help but giggle as his Beta pouts and lets Clint pull him in for a hug, whispering to Tony that no, leather couches actually sound fuckin’ awesome.

Peter turns sideways, looping his arms around Bucky’s waist and tangling their legs together as Bucky continues to eat. He feels a familiar hand in his hair and hums, happy to have Tony’s touch back, even if it’s reluctant.

After another half an hour, Annie and Steve get up to clear the dishes, talking softly and spending a few extra minutes in the kitchen cleaning up. Peter takes this as his cue to start their conversation. He moves to a large, chaise barrel chair, facing the couches, and waits for everyone to grab their drinks and settle down.

When Steve walks back in the room, Peter extends his hand— an invitation that the Alpha takes and gently rearranges them to sit together on the sofa. He watches as Clint opens his arms and Annie runs to join the rest of the pack on the long couch.

The room gradually quiets down, and Steve clears his throat, getting their attention. Peter gives him a quick peck on the cheek and addresses their pack, “So I realized today, while I was talking to Tony, that we should probably have a serious talk about sex before moving in together and bonding, uh... forever.”

A few of them chuckle, but the room feels uncomfortable. Peter looks to Steve for help,

“Yeah, so it’s gonna be important that we have open communication about this,” Steve continues, “especially ‘cause our separate packs already have established dynamics and such. Uh,” he looks at Peter, shrugging, “maybe it would be easiest to talk now about personal preferences for scenes, and later we can share official limits? I have paperwork!”

Both Bucky and Clint groan— causing Steve to roll his eyes— but Tony interjects, giving Peter a secret wink, “Should we update our existing papers, Steve, or just use the old ones?”

“Probably update them. I assume you guys have your own contracts, right?” he asks, turning to Peter.

“Yes, but it’s mostly non-intimate stuff. We only scene if I really need to go down, and we rarely do intimate scenes,” both Clint and Annie nod in agreement, “Oh! Plus we’ll need to talk about heats, too.”

“Have y’all hadda heat together yet?” Bucky asks, motioning toward Annie and Peter.

Annie answers, “No, we’ve both been on suppressants since before we met. I only had three heats before I went on them.”

“I only had one— I presented late,” Peter adds,

Bucky nods, “Okay, yeah I only had one in high school.”

“And none of you have shared a heat with someone before?” Tony asks, giving Bucky’s shoulders a squeeze.

There’s a resounding no from all the Omegas, and Steve lets out a long exhale, “Are you guys plannin’ on goin’ to the Omega clinic?”

“Yeah,” Annie confirms, “we have an appointment on Monday.”

Peter looks over at Bucky who’s looking back at him with wide, uncertain eyes, “Can you come with us, Bucky? That way we can talk to the doctor together.”

“Yeah, I’ve just… I’ve never—”

“It’s okay,” Peter stops him, “we’ll do it together.”

Tony reaches down and pulls Bucky up by the armpits, earning a squawk of surprise as he’s wrestled into Tony’s lap. Everyone laughs a bit as Bucky struggles and eventually submits to Tony’s hold on his waist, relaxing with a sigh.

The rest of the conversation is awkward, but easy. Each of them talk a little bit about their orientation and what they prefer in their current pack dynamics. For Peter, it’s interesting to hear from his Versatile packmates about their experiences swinging dominant and submissive. Bucky has spent almost six years being Steve’s submissive and three years submitting to both his Alpha and Beta, so it’s uncomfortable and different for him to be dominant in a relationship, since he’s never had to dominante a partner before.

In contrast, both Annie and Clint have experiences swinging both ways in their relationship with each other and with Peter. Clint has reservations about permanently swinging dominant, because of his past with abusive dominants, and similarly doesn’t want to swing permanently submissive. Annie feels comfortable both ways, which is something Peter already knew. She is very vocal about her preferences.

Peter shares about what it’s like to be a SubOmega, and his preferences during a scene— which, at this point, are very few. He lost his virginity to Clint and Annie, and has never taken a knot before. He smells SmugHornyAlpha coming off of Steve after this confession, and giggles slightly as Steve shamefully apologizes.

Steve and Tony both keep their time short. Peter knows a bit about Tony’s past, and knows he’s been in an intimate and unique familial pack before. Steve and Bucky have both been in other relationships, but only Steve was sexually active before they officially got together.

Possibly the most interesting part of the conversation is learning about how Steve and Tony balance being Dominant over the same Submissive.

“I think the most important part is to realize that Dominant, Submissive, or Versatile, the purpose of our orientation is all the same: service to others,” Steve explains, holding Peter tight around the waist, “so whether it’s five Doms and one Sub in a room, or a balanced pairing— Tony, Bucky, and I have all decided to love and serve each other. To put one another first. And because of this, our scenes are always fun and satisfying.”

“Ya soun’ like ‘n infomercial, Stevie,” Bucky mumbles, eyes blinking slowly— dangerously close to sleep.

“Shaddup, jerk— you know it’s true. Our scenes always build trust and support between us. And that’s what I want for our intimate pack.”

A few voices hum their agreement, but with a glance around the room, Peter realizes most of them are falling asleep. He yawns and pulls on Steve’s sleeve, getting his attention.

“Alpha, can we finish this later?”

Steve hums, distracted, and then suddenly focuses, his hum shifting— changing to a deep, rumbling growl. It startles Peter into looking up, and the Alpha’s eyes are half-lidded, dark and intense. Peter’s breath picks up. He watches as Steve moves closer, reeling him in, and leans to press his nose against the base of Peter’s throat.

Peter keens, and lets his body go limp in the strong, safe arms of his Alpha. He feels each of their breaths align, he feels their hearts beat together. He’s not sure what he smells like right now, but assumes it compliments Steve’s ProudContentStrongAlpha scent pretty well.

It doesn’t matter, though, because there’s a cloud at his back.

Gentle fingers run through his hair.

He feels the shuffle of clothes against his skin.

Floating, weightless.

---

It’s light when he wakes up again, surrounded by warmth and the sound of gentle snoring. He knows who he wishes were next to him, breathing into his neck. Drooling down his neck.

“Clint, my god,” Peter pushes at the big Beta, trying to get him to roll over, but only gets a loud snore in response.

He flops back down and tries to scoot the other way, happy to burrow into Annie’s soft curves, trailing his freezing fingertips up her hips and underneath her t-shirt—

She gasps awake, “Peter! Dammit!” and tries to squirm away from him as he cackles, waking Clint up with a snort.

“Wha— what,” Clint flails around, aimless, as Annie shoves Peter his way. One of his arms catches Peter across the back of the head, and the small Omega yelps in pain.

“Ouch, Clint. The hell?”

“Aw, poor baby,” Annie coos, pulling Peter into an octopus embrace and incidentally shoving his face right in between her breasts, “I’ll make it better.”

Mngh mmngh mngghh, Peter tries to beg Annie, and she finally releases him to heave a deep breath of relief, “You trying to kill me, woman?”

“No, Petey, just suffocate you a little bit.” Annie gives him a shark’s grin and starts to crawl towards him on her knees. He retreats, scrambling backwards until his back hits Clint’s chest and the Beta pulls his arms behind his back, holding him still.

Peter struggles, grunting, “Hey! What is this? Let me go, Clint,” but there’s no mercy as Annie finally reaches him, kneeling between his legs and leaning forward to kiss his nose.

“Wanna play, bunny?” she purrs, trailing a finger down his chest, clothed in a loose t-shirt, down to the waistband of his tight, black briefs. He can’t take his eyes off her face, and finds himself nodding in a daze, entranced by her wicked smile.

She looks over his shoulder and tilts her head at Clint, and he stutters, “P— please, Omega,” the desperation in his tone making Peter tremble.

“Good boy, birdy,” Annie mocks him, reaching around Peter to run a hand up Clint’s thigh and settling over his boxers, in between where he’s pressed up against Peter’s ass. She crawls a little closer, grabbing Peter’s chin and tipping his head up to look at her, “gimme a color, little bunny. Want me to make you both feel good— use his body to make you come?”

Peter struggles to blink, and his sight goes crossed for a second as he mewls, “Green, Omega.”

She keeps eye contact with Peter and asks Clint, “How about you, baby bird? Gonna keep you on edge, share your body with our sweet bunny, and control your pleasure. Color?”

Clint is physically shaking behind him, and he barely whispers, “Green, Omega, please,” before Annie is encouraging him to lean back against the headboard, shifting to hold Peter’s arms even further behind his back.

His Omega grabs him around the hips, and uses her knees to keep his legs spread.

“Strip him, birdy.”

The command is sharp and has Clint moving instantly, yanking Peter’s shirt up over his chest, and effortlessly moving his arms and legs to pull the shirt and his briefs off completely. Peter doesn’t have a moment to shy away from his Omega’s stare, because his arms are restrained again and she’s spreading his legs wide.

Clint’s breathing heavy on the back of his neck, and he can feel the Beta’s hardness pressed up against his back through the thin layer of boxer shorts, rutting against him lightly.

It seems that his Omega knows this, because she orders Clint’s clothes off next. Once they’re naked and rearranged to her liking, she runs a finger down Peter’s waist, scratching gently through the sparse hair above his cock, and feels underneath his balls, humming thoughtfully at the mess of slick she finds there.

He squirms as her small fingers trace around his rim, panting and throwing his head back at the tease. He hears her laugh and tries to hide his face in Clint’s neck, instead getting a whiff of HornyDesperateBeta scent from his mate.

His Omega dips the tip of one finger into his hole, up to the first knuckle.

“Play with his little titties, birdy,” she instructs, and immediately Clint readjusts his grip on Peter’s arms so that he can pinch and tug on the smaller man’s nipples.

“Oh, dammit, Omega more, please,” he begs, bucking into the torture across his sensitive chest and grinding down onto the finger inside of him.

“Patient, sweet bunny,” she shushes, pulling her finger out and swiping three of them through the slick leaking out of him. She lifts up her hand, acting surprised, “wow, feeling needy, little bunny rabbit? How about a taste?”

He nods his head yes, opening his mouth wide, but his Omega just shakes her head with a fake, sad pout, “Aw, baby— not for you,” and he watches as she reaches over, and—

— and feeds his slick, finger by finger, into Clint’s open mouth.

“That’s my good baby bird,” she coos, pushing her fingers in and slowly fucking his face with her hand. His eyes close in pleasure as he sucks desperately, eager to get all of Peter’s taste off of her fingers.

Peter whines as Clint pinches his nipple a little too hard, and his Omega turns her attention back to him.

“Hungry, baby bunny? Need something in your mouth?”

“Yes, Omega, please— anything, ‘m so empty—” he begs, and his Omega shushes him.

“Put your fingers in his mouth, birdy. I’m gonna put him on your cock.”

Both of them groan at her words, and he can feel Clint twitch against his back. The Beta reaches up and hooks two fingers into the side of his mouth, pulling slightly and forcing his head to tip backwards. He releases Peter’s arms and uses his left hand to flick across his nipples. Peter grabs at his thighs, desperate for control.

His Omega uses the distraction to work a second finger back into his hole, twisting and scissoring until Peter is grinding down, rhythmically, against her hand. His tiny, Omega cock is rock hard, and Clint has started alternating between flicking his nipples and his cockhead, making him cry out in torment.

She adds a third, and he begs around Clint’s fingers, “Oh— Omega, I can’t, please. Please, I need. I need—”

“Hush, baby bunny,” she shushes him, and Clint pushes his fingers deeper into Peter’s mouth, giving his cock a pinch with his other hand. Their Omega wipes away a few of his tears and pulls her fingers free, “why don’t you lift up, bunny?”

It’s torture. He can barely move, and his arms are trembling where they hold onto Clint’s thighs. After trying twice and failing to pick himself up, tears are flowing freely from his eyes and he looks to his Omega, blubbering, “I— I can’t,” sobs, “O— omega, please, I can’t!”

“Help him, birdy,” she instructs, leaning back to watch as Clint moves his hands down, cups under his ass, and effortlessly lifts him up. He cries harder, humiliated, as he feels Clint’s cock line up with his fluttering, empty hole.

There’s a soft hand on his cheek, and he realizes his Omega is waiting for something. He blinks through his tears, opening and closing his mouth— unsure of what she wants.

He must make a sad noise, because she’s quick to repeat, “It’s ok, Peter. Can you give me a color?”

Oh, okay. “Green, ‘mega,” he slurs, trying to give her a reassuring smile, and hears Clint whisper his agreement.

“Good boys, so good for me. Alright, birdy— you can lower him. Slowly.”

Peter lets his body go limp, helpless, as he’s worked slowly onto Clint’s cock. He feels every inch as his body is split in half for his Omega’s pleasure. For his pleasure.

Clint is shaking and panting, whimpering cries of please, Omega and holy fuck.

After a few long, agonizing moments, Peter is fully settled into Clint’s lap. The Beta is still cursing, and moves his hands from Peter’s hips to underneath his knees, pulling his legs back and exposing him wide.

“Fuck, Petey, how are you so fuckin’ tight, my god,” Clint breaths into his neck, and Peter rests his head back against the larger man’s shoulder, relaxing in his arms.

He feels a hand stroke up his tummy, and across his chest. His arms are moved again and settled onto the top of the headboard with a command of, “hold on tight, bunny.”

All of his focus is on obeying the command, so he almost misses his Omega’s next instructions—

“Baby bunny— you can come as many times as you’d like—”

— Peter whines in relief—

“— and baby bird, you can fuck him now,” Clint sighs, “but don’t you dare come, do you understand me?”

“Fuck, holy shit—” Clint curses, “green, Omega. Green, oh my god.”

The first thrust takes him by surprise. It’s almost like a levee breaks, something that was holding Clint’s hips back, and he pulls Peter up by his knees— like a fucking cocksleeve— and slams him back down on his cock with a howl.

All Peter can do is hold on as Clint begins an unforgiving pace, chasing his own pleasure. He feels the hands on his skin, the praises rolling over him, and he tries to say something but can’t, buried under pleasure and praise and—

— and he almost loses his grip on the headboard as his orgasm shakes through him. His lips open and close in a wordless plea as he clenches down on the thick cock still hammering into his hole, slapping wet against his ass.

His Omega moans her encouragement, “Fuck, baby, so good for me. Come for me baby bunny, so pretty, so good,” and he faintly feels her lips, her tongue, tracing around his cock and cleaning up the clear cum pouring out.

“Shit, Omega, I’m— I’m close, fuck,” Clint curses, still moving inside Peter even as he starts to shake from overstimulation.

“Absolutely not,” their Omega commands, standing up on the bed to move them. Clint drops Peter with a heave, both of them groaning as he bottoms out, and their Omega carefully moves his hands off the headboard, setting them back on Clint’s hips. She looks down into Peter’s eyes and then into Clint’s, “two more orgasms, birdy. Two more times— either me or him— and I’ll let you come.”

She kicks a leg over, stradling Clint’s face, and Peter realizes that at some point she took her panties off but left her shirt on. She’s beautiful, and he tries to say as much. Sadly, it just comes out as a choked gasp.

Clint’s pleas turn into moans as their Omega settles on his face, grinding down against his mouth with a firm grip in his hair. Using him. Clint flails, grabbing at Peter’s knees, and picks up where he left off, lifting him up and dropping him fully onto his cock, over and over.

Peter struggles to keep his eyes open, staring up at the vision of Clint licking, hungry into his Omega, but spiraling quickly, floating higher as he feels his orgasm build again.

Knock, knock.

“Fuck!” his Omega curses, and slaps Clint’s shoulder when he slows his pace, “keep going, they’ll go away.”

Clint hums and picks up his pace when—

Knock, knock, knock.

“Dammit,” their Omega jumps off of Clint’s face and looks into his eyes, “keep fucking him. There’s a reward in it for you if he comes before I get back,” and she jumps off the bed, grabbing a pair of their boxers on the way.

Clint resumes his pace, gathering both of Peter’s legs together in one of his long arms and using his free hand to turn Peter’s face, capturing his lips in a wet, sloppy kiss. Peter can taste their Omega on his lips, and suddenly his orgasm is right there.

“Clin’ oh, uh, uh, ‘m gonna,” he tries to warn, but it more or less comes out as a high pitched squeal.

“Yeah, pretty Omega, come on. Come for me. Come on Peter, give it to me, fuck, you feel so damn good, baby—”

His eyes roll back as the second orgasm overtakes him, shaking through his legs and bursting out of his chest in a desperate wail. Clint’s thrusts slow back down, but he barely feels them. He opens and closes his fingers, trying to hold on, and fails, floating high above his body. Below his body.

There’s a release of pressure.

Warmth shifts from his back to his side.

Small wet noises and low rumbles of begging.

His eyes blink open, soft and slow. He feels light. He feels empty.

As his vision starts to swim into focus, he realizes his Omega has moved him to the side. She’s now riding Clint into the mattress. Hard.

A flash of Clint’s face— it looks like he’s seeing heaven open— and Peter smiles, curling into the Beta’s side and clinging to one of his arms as he floats away again.

---

An hour later, Peter is up and cuddling with his pack. It took awhile to bring him back, but his pack let him float— content to relax in his submission and forget about the hundred other things going wrong outside their bedroom.

Turns out the interruption was Bucky, coming to check on them after hearing a “horrific dying animal noise.”

“Was it the noise I made or the noise Clint made?” Peter asks.

Clint rolls his eyes, and Annie answers, “Clint howled like a fucking Alpha when he dropped you on his cock.”

“Oh my— Annie!” Peter yelps, hiding his face in Clint’s arm as his mate cackles.

“You’re just too delicious, Petey. Couldn’t help myself.”

Peter rolls his eyes, but still nestles closer, “Did you float, Clint?”

“For a bit— definitely not like you did, Pete.”

“Hey,” Annie buts in, “drink this, Peter,” and she presses a bottle against his lips.

He takes a few moments to down the whole thing— he is exceedingly thirsty— before asking, “Did Bucky say anything?”

“No, he brought us water, though. And snacks. And then he ran away.”

Peter yawns and pulls Annie’s arm around him, “I wish he’d stayed to cuddle.”

His packmates snuggle in closer and pull up the blanket, cocooning themselves and drifting off for a nap before starting the day officially. When they wake up around noon, the first thing Annie does is call the Omega clinic to book Bucky an adjoining appointment with theirs.

Monday comes sooner than they expect, and all three Omegas pile into the small clinic for their appointments.

Peter keeps looking up at Bucky. The older Omega has been quiet since they left the house, and it’s starting to get concerning. Annie went into her appointment a few minutes ago, so the two of them are alone in the waiting room. He threads their fingers together, placing a small kiss on the back of his hand.

“Bucky?”

No response.

“Bucky? Buck? James? Jamie?”

At the last one, Bucky blinks a few times and shakes his head.

“Wha… what did you call me?”

“I— I don’t know, I was just trying to get your attention—”

“Only my parents ever called me Jamie,” Bucky says, looking down at Peter with wide eyes.

Peter tries to apologize, stuttering, “I’m so so sorry, Bucky, I swear, I wasn’t trying to—”

“Pete,” Bucky squeezes his hand, “it’s okay, darlin’. I… I enjoyed it, is all.”

“... what?”

Bucky sighs, “Stevie called me Bucky for the first time when we were in middle school, ya know? I’d always been James or Jamie, but hated it when I was little. After that day, I only went by Bucky— I guess that was his claim on me, even back then. But now, it sounds good to be called Jamie by someone I consider home, alright?”

Peter scrubs at the tears forming in his eyes, looking up at Bucky as he asks, “I feel like home?”

“Yeah, Pete, you do. You don’t have to, but I’d love for you to call me Jamie. Damn... okay maybe that’s actually a bad idea, you know what, forget—”

“No, no,” Peter interrupts, “I’d love to call you Jamie. Really. We should… we should spend some time together. Like, alone together.”

Jamie finally smiles at this, nodding along, “I’d love that, Pete. Wanna go away for a weekend, or just spend a few days in my nest and kick everyone else out?”

“Either, but I’d like to do it before… before we have sex together. Or share a heat. I’d like to know you a bit more.”

“So no sex on our weekend away?” Jamie asks, and Peter looks up in surprise— and he’s laughing. Oh.

Peter gives him a light push, “I swear, you’re no better than Clint.”

Both of them end up laughing, leaning against each other and getting dirty looks from a few other patients that they ignore.

Within a few minutes, the nurses call their names and they go back for their appointments. Separately. Everything goes normally for Peter, but he can’t stop worrying about Jamie the whole time. He knows his scent must reek, but the doctor, thankfully, doesn’t comment on it. Once he’s given a clean bill of health, plus a negative pregnancy test, the nurses usher him into a larger exam room where Annie and Jamie sit waiting for him.

They take a few moments to scent each other, holding on tight, before specifically checking in on Jamie. They’re relieved to hear that his STD and pregnancy tests are negative, and all of them share details about their own exams, ultrasounds, and other blood work they had to do.

After a minute, there’s a knock on the door, and an older, female doctor enters the room.

“Hi, I’m Doctor Michaels,” she says sitting in the chair across from where they’re piled on the large exam couch, “I’m told you would like to talk about pack bonding today, correct?”

All of them exchange a look, but stay relatively silent. Great. Perfect time for them to swing submissive.

Doctor Michaels is patient, and Jamie finally speaks up.

“Yeah, Doc. We need’ta know how to bond. We’ve got an Alpha and two Betas at home who we want to bond with, but none of us have any idea what to do.”

She laughs lightly, politely, and Peter gets a whiff of sweet Omega scent from her.

“Here, all three of you take these booklets,” she passes them out, and Peter almost scoffs at the title: How to Make Your Forever, Last.

She continues on, “I’m sure you’ve had conversations with your whole pack about bonding, so the only reminder I’ll give is that a bond, when formed correctly between two consenting parties, will last indefinitely. If any of your bonded pack members were to leave and start a separate, familial pack, the bond you share will still remain and that member would be unable to rebond with another person. Understand?”

All three of them nod their heads affirmative.

“Good, now— are you all living together yet?”

“Yeah,” Jamie answers again, “we have a home and by the summer we’ll be livin' together permanently.”

“Okay, that’s imperative for testing compatibility and establishing territory. You will also need to set rules and guidelines for sexual intimacy, especially regarding gender dynamics and orientations. Speaking of which, do you have designated spaces for nesting and scenes?”

“We do. Right now, we have two nests, two dens, and two separate scene rooms. I think Stevie— that’s our DomAlpha— is plannin’ to build out a main den and the Omegas will rebuild one nest together durin’ a heat or somethin’.”

She hums in acknowledgement and makes a note, “Let’s talk about heats. I see here on your charts that none of you have shared a heat with a partner, is this correct?” they all nod, yes, “The only way a pack can bond is when an Omega mate is in heat. If all six of you are to share a bond, it will be strongest if the Omegas are synched. Have you heard this term before?”

Annie speaks up, “Once or twice. My mom used to talk about it— where Omegas off their suppressants and intimate together will get on the same heat cycle.”

“Right,” the doctor agrees, “you’ll need to go off your suppressants and wait two or three cycles before your bodies officially synch together. I’m going to suggest that each of those heats you spend with each other and try to keep other packmates from interacting unless absolutely necessary. It’s best that your hormones aren’t affected by other mates during this time.”

Jamie makes a small displeased noise, but quickly clears his throat, motioning for her to continue.

The doctor smiles again, “I know, it’ll be hard spending a few heats without your full pack, but truly, it will be for the best if you want to form a strong bond.”

“So,” Peter asks, “what about during the heat that we all have together? When we’re ready to bond— what happens then?”

“Well, it depends. I have to ask— will your bonded pack have a Dominant Alpha and Submissive Omega present?”

Peter nods, “Yes, me and Steve.”

“Okay, that will help the process significantly. You’ve probably already talked about your role as the cornerstone of the pack, but during the bonding process, it is essential that the two of you bond and knot first. It’s going to be hard for the other pack members to refrain from mating during that time, but it will help to establish an order of bonding before the occasion to curb any confusion during the hormone-fueled heats.”

“So, we have to… Steve and I have to bond before anyone else can?” Peter asks, avoiding his packmates’ attention.

“Yes,” the doctor agrees, “the whole pack can be with you, if you desire, but he will have to knot you and both of you exchange a secure bite on the neck before other packmates can join the process.”

The three Omegas shift uncomfortably at the description, and Peter slips his hand into Jamie’s, holding on tight.

“After this, just make sure all of the desired bonds are completed before the end of your shared heat. I assume your Betas know of their ability to satisfy an Omega during heat?”

“Uh…” Peter pauses, looking to Annie and Jamie, but both of them seem confused, “probably not?”

“It’s okay, it’s all in the booklet, too. Betas have the ability to help Omegas in their heats and Alphas in their ruts by simulating biological responses necessary for satisfaction in their partners. For instance— when the three of you enter heat together, your Beta packmates will both be able to knot you temporarily. It’s a shorter duration than an Alpha’s knot and only happens for the heat, but their semen still has calming properties, and under the right circumstances, can help an Omega conceive.”

At this, Jamie makes a sad noise that has both of them turning to him.

“Doc,” he starts, head down and body language tense, “is it true that only the Dominant Alpha and Submissive Omega can pup?”

Peter spins to look at him in surprise. What?

“Yes, after bonding, the cornerstone pair in the pack will undergo a hormonal shift in their reproductive system, creating a symbiosis and making it so that only their systems are compatible. The Alpha’s semen only works on the Omega’s uterus, basically.”

“How… wait, so— my body… what about Steve and Jamie? What about Tony?”

“I can only assume those are your other mates. It will still be possible for the two of you, James and Annie, to be impregnated by either of your Betas should the desire arise. Because of this,” she transitions, ignoring the ShockedDevestatedUpsetOmega scent overtaking the room, “I will still keep all of you on contraceptives unless you are wanting to conceive during your first heat. Is this okay?”

They nod, wordless and still shocked.

“Perfect. And lastly, what is the general timeline for bonding? I need to know in order to schedule appointments to retract the semi-permanent suppressants.”

“It’s,” Jamie clears his throat, “it’s as soon as possible, I think. We wanna be bonded this summer.”

“Great, then we can remove the suppressants today before you leave. Are there any other questions you may have for me?”

They shake their heads, no, and she excuses herself from the room, promising to send a nurse to complete the procedures.

When the door shuts, the three of them crowd together, hooking their chins over shoulders and shifting into each other’s laps. Peter feels Jamie grip him tight, and looks into his eyes, which are glazed over and blown wide.

He’s dropping, Peter thinks to himself, and he’s dropping dominant.

Because of this, it isn’t surprising that Jamie growls when the nurse enters the room. Peter shushes him, lacing their fingers together, and the nurse waits for their permission before approaching the chair where they sit.

The nurse pulls out a few of the tools, and asks them, “Alright, who wants to go first?”

Jamie growls again, but answers, “I will,” before lifting his shirt, giving her access to his suppressant site.

They watch as she squeezes around his stomach, feeling for the insertion. His face is screwed up in discomfort, breathing heavily.

She finds the site, a small bump underneath his skin that feeds directly into his endocrine system, and squeezes it towards the surface of his skin. Grabbing the syringe, she warns him about the sharp pain and quickly inserts the needle, puncturing the suppressant site, and injecting a clear liquid. Jamie hisses through his teeth, clamping down hard on Peter’s arm, as the nurse changes out her tool and attaches a suction to his stomach, turning on the corresponding machine that starts to massage his skin.

“It’s going to break apart the remaining parts of the suppressant site, and it will be absorbed into your system with little side effects,” she says, turning off the machine and starting to sanitize it again.

“Alright,” she turns back with a new syringe, “who’s next?”

---

“I’m never goin’ back to that damn clinic ever again.”

After their procedures, Jamie had towed both Omegas out of the clinic and back to the car, throwing them in the backseat, buckling their seat belts, and taking off towards their house.

Annie tries to get his attention, “Bucky, we should probably call—”

A deep, feral growl cuts her off, and both Omegas remain silent for the rest of the ride. Peter pulls out his phone and sends a quick text to Steve, letting him know about Jamie’s drop. He also texts Tony and Clint, asking both of them to be ready to help when they get home.

Jamie isn’t driving fast— honestly, he’s probably going under the speed limit— but Peter and Annie are still holding on tight to each other, struggling to keep themselves from dropping submissive as Jamie pumps AggressiveUpsetDistressedOmega scent into the car.

When they pull up, Jamie is immediately around the side of the car, hauling both of them out of the back seat and stalking towards the front door with a low, persistent growl.

Before they even reach the door, Steve steps out with Tony and Clint not too far behind him. Jamie lets out a louder growl, straightening up, shoving both Omegas behind him— facing the Alpha head on. Steve steps closer, meeting his challenge,

“Stand down, Bucky.”

The command washes over all of them, and Peter feels his knees give in, crumpling to the ground. He can’t tear his eyes away from his Alpha— standing in front of Jamie with an expectant look on his face and ordering him to his knees in submission.

He sees Jamie finally collapse, sinking to his knees in front of their Alpha, and then there’s suddenly a set of hands on his shoulders.

“Peter, come with me, baby,” Tony croons into his ear, and he nods his head, letting his Beta scoop him up and carry him away, far away, into the house. They settle onto the nesting couch, and Tony starts to wrap him in blankets, whispering sweet encouragements into his ear that make Peter feel safe and warm.

Distantly, he hears sniffling and crying. Tony takes a moment to help him drink water, and he hums his appreciation.

“Tony?” he whispers, cursing himself quietly for how weak he sounds,

It surprises his boyfriend, though, and he’s immediately shifted to stare deep into his Beta’s eyes, “Yes, baby? Are you okay? What happened?”

He ignores the question for now, “Where’s Annie? And Jamie? Are they okay?”

“Yeah, sweetheart, they’re fine. Steve’s got Bucky in the den and Clint has Annie up in your nest.”

“Oh, okay,” he closes his eyes, “I’m fine, Beta. We had a rough time at the clinic— they gave us a lot of information and then we had a painful procedure to get our suppressants removed— and I think that caused all of us to drop.”

“I can tell, Pete. I’ve never seen Bucky challenge Steve like that before— it was quite a sight.”

Peter sighs, “I think he felt like we were in trouble. I should be with him.”

“No, not right now,” Tony’s tone is firm, “we can talk tonight, but right now he needs to spend time with our Alpha.”

“Beta, I need to talk to you about something,” he whispers, ducking his head to avoid eye contact. Tony grabs his chin, not letting him get away, while motioning for him to continue, “the doctor said… she said I can’t have your pups, Tony.”

His tears start to gather in his eyes, and Tony wipes them away tenderly,

“I know.”

“... you know?”

“Yeah, baby. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you earlier, but we figured it out a few years ago when the boys were courting me.”

“Oh.”

“Don’t— no, I’m really sorry, I really am Peter. I would have told you before we bonded if the doctor hadn’t mentioned it today. Bucky is devastated that he can’t have Steve’s pups—”

“I know—”

“And— oh, okay. So I can assume that’s one of the things that set him off?”

Peter rolls his eyes, “You think, Tony?”

“Damn, okay, I’m really fucking this up,” Tony scrubs his face, “Peter. I’m… you gotta know, baby, that I love you regardless. So does Steve. None of us expect pups from you, and you know that you don’t have to bond with Steve, right?”

“Stop it, Tony. I heard the news and then got my suppressant removed. I made this choice. I’m just pissed that we got so far without anyone bringing it up. I mean— we’re already living here! Dammit Tony, you asked me to trust you and I’m trying.”

“And I know that, sweetheart,” Tony says, caressing a thumb across Peter’s cheek, “I didn’t mean to keep anything from you, Peter. I respect you— you know that, right?”

Peter mirrors his touch, putting his smaller hand on Tony’s cheek, “I know, Tony.”

Tony looks relieved and leans closer. Peter closes his eyes, ready for the kiss—

“Hey— oh, sorry—”

They whip around to see Steve waiting next to their chair, shifting awkwardly where he stands and holding one of his hands behind his back. Peter scans the room, and sees Bucky curled up with Annie and Clint on a nearby couch, watching them intently.

“It’s okay, Alpha, what’s going on?” Peter untangles from Tony’s arms, sitting up straighter to look Steve in the face. Tony rubs his back encouragingly.

Steve looks to Tony, looks behind him towards their pack— all of whom give him a thumbs up— and then slowly gets to both knees, pulling a red, velvet box from behind his back, and opening it to reveal a sparkling, diamond ring.

“I— what?”

“Peter, I realized that I shouldn’t wait to ask you this. You’ve stepped so gracefully into the role we’ve required of you, and it happens to come with a lifelong bond to an Alpha you barely know. I want you to know— I’m falling in love with you. I don’t want our bond to be built out of necessity, I want it to be built out of affection and commitment to each other. I don’t just want forever with this pack— I want forever with you,”

At this, Steve bares his neck in submission and holds out the ring, “Peter Parker: will you be mine? In love, in bond, and in marriage?”

Peter feels Tony’s thumb on his cheek and realizes he’s crying again.

“Y— yes, Steve. I’ll be yours. I’m—” he takes a deep breath, “— I’m falling in love with you, too, Alpha.”

He slides off the couch, joining his Alpha on the floor, and melts into his arms as the room erupts in excited cheers.

With Steve’s ring on his finger and nose in his neck, his problems start to melt away. They’re strong together, they’re right together. And even though his pack won’t make his worries disappear— with all six of them celebrating around him and embracing each other— it seems as though they can face anything, together.

[lizaloveslevihan]

Wherever You Will Go

Summary: She was a coffee stained, shitstorm of crumpled paper whose idiosyncrasies surprisingly complimented his well. She opened his eyes to the beautifully cruel world they lived in, and he found himself never wanting to leave her side.

Even when they were separated far apart. 

A levihan modern AU in which their entire story together plays out as Hange’s life is left hanging in the balance after a fatal car crash.

Chapter 3/? (Ao3 link here)

Chapter One // Chapter Two 

Notes: Thank you to @tundrainafrica​ for helping me proofread this chapter! You’re awesome and I really appreciate it <3

It was fortunate -- incredibly fortunate, that Levi Ackerman had his fair share of misfortunes. If that weren’t the case, then perhaps he would have found himself in a similar position as her. 

He had a better reign on his emotions than most people. However, that didn’t stop him from running a red light in an empty street. It didn’t stop him from gripping the sides of the steering wheel, knuckles almost white as paper. It most certainly did not stop him from exceeding the speed limit -- just by a few fractions.

And of course, it didn’t stop the tears that were pooling, ever so slowly, behind his eyes.

The hospital was twenty minutes away from his apartment. He had made it in ten. 

He didn’t remember stopping the car. He couldn’t remember, for the life of him, parking and shutting the door. He didn’t remember running -- running as fast as he could to the wide, gray building. What he did remember, what he so painfully remembered, however, were his last words to her. 

It had been such a simple conflict. A simple conflict with such a simple solution. 

He ran past patients and doctors and took the staircase instead of the elevator, climbing two steps at a time. Erwin had told him which floor he had to get to but didn’t elaborate on the details of the accident. All he knew was that it was a car crash. And that it was bad.

The fluorescent lights were unforgiving. The white walls were screaming. The cool, vinyl flooring was endless. His feet pounded against them, body narrowly avoiding the faceless. 

The object felt heavier in his pocket with every step he took. He almost forgot it was there with him. But now, it rattled and shook and taunted him with his failure. He wanted nothing more than to throw it away, forget it existed, and so that maybe, just maybe, the argument wouldn’t have ever happened. 

He sprinted, head throbbing. Adrenaline never ceasing. Not even when he found him. 

Dress in a long-sleeved shirt and slacks with blonde hair slightly ruffled, Erwin Smith had seen better days. He looked as though he had abruptly woken up in the middle of the night and had hastily thrown on clothes without a second thought. All of which, he had, of course. Levi had never seen him so clearly unfocused and uncollected. Another slap to his face. 

Standing next to him was a man with the same predicament, but was handling the situation in a vastly different way.

With shoulders incredibly stiff, he had still managed to make multiple and outlandish gestures with his arms. His voice, both stressed and fearful, desperately fired question after question towards the doctor who stood impassively in front of them. 

He only stopped when he noticed Levi fast approaching.

It was then Levi witnessed yet another thing he had never thought would happen in his life.

He felt a large fist connect to his right cheek, knocking over his balance which made him stagger to the floor. He could have gotten up and retaliated faster if he hadn’t been so shocked at what just happened. 

“What did you do?” Moblit Berner growled slowly, his cold, hazel eyes sneering down at him. Levi’s eyes narrowed in surprise and embarrassment as he tentatively touched his cheek. The curses and exclamations he was so used to delivering died down in his throat when he saw the tears pooling in those hazel eyes. The same eyes that pleaded with him to keep her safe. From the same person who protected her countless times. He was about to grab Levi by the collar when Erwin finally intervened, firmly placing a hand on the man’s arm. 

“Moblit.” Erwin said in his usual authoritative tone as he regarded Levi blankly, “Don’t.”

Levi carefully rose from his position. Never in his life did he feel as much terror as he did at that very moment. It had nothing to do with Moblit Berner, but rather, the implications of his actions. The implications of his anger. He wanted to ask, no, demand the answers to the questions forming in his head. What happened? Why was he so angry? He barely spoke to Moblit, but he knew that under any normal circumstances, he wouldn’t be capable of doing such a thing -- especially to Levi out of all people. 

However, for some reason, all of those questions had clogged in his throat, refusing to come out of his mouth. It was a terrible defense mechanism, really. 

Ignoring the stares of those faceless around them, he placed a hand against the wall to help balance himself. His gray eyes sharing the same intensity as those hazel ones. 

“I’m sorry, Mr. Berner, but I’m going to have to ask you to step out of the building,” the doctor spoke up firmly, causing Moblit to tear his gaze away from Levi, “I know we’re all feeling very emotional right now, but I cannot allow you to cause any more disturbances.”

Moblit’s face hardened as he shook off Erwin’s hold on him. The people who had witnessed the scene slowly started dispersing and going about their own business. Levi had to admit, if they had been in a completely different situation, he’d consider Moblit’s actions to be rather impressive. No one could ever get away with what he had just done. 

Which caused another shiver of terror to run down his spine.

“I understand.” Moblit said, even though his tone indicated that he didn’t, “But before I do, I want your complete assurance that you will double-check all her head injuries.”

“Rest assured, Mr. Berner, my attendings know what they’re doing,” the doctor said carefully. It was clear she was done with this argument but had no choice but to retain her professionalism, “I understand your concerns, and I’m telling you that they have aptly looked at all of the patient’s injuries and are doing their best to stop and prevent any more bleeding.”

Moblit didn’t look all too convinced about that statement, and before he could argue, even more, Levi finally found his voice. 

“What exactly happe--”

He wasn’t able to finish his sentence as Moblit tackled him to the ground, knocking the wind from his lungs and pinning his shoulders. 

“You happened! If you hadn’t argued with her, maybe she wouldn’t have wrapped herself around a tree goddamnit!” Moblit heaved, his eyes red. Ignoring the gasps and protests of those around him, he continued: “You killed her! You could have stopped her! You’ll go to hell for this.”

“We’ll discuss this tomorrow,” Hange said angrily, her figure already by the door as she threw on her jacket. “Maybe you wouldn’t have a stick up your ass by then.”

“What’s so wrong with wanting to go with you?” Levi gritted his teeth, eyes narrowed as he crossed his arms. The hurt he felt was seeping into his voice. “It won’t be a problem for me. Unless there’s another reason why you’re doing this--”

“I just want what’s best for you! Can’t you see that? We’ll still be together--”

“You don’t understand!” Levi argued. But he was wrong. He knew Hange did understand, and as much as he didn’t like it, Levi understood where she was coming from as well. But how could he tell her that as much as he understood, he still wanted to go wherever she went? To be by her side always?

Hange opened the door with surprising calmness, a contrast to her emotions. “We’ll figure it out in the morning,” she said in a clipped tone. Their eyes didn’t meet as she walked out the door. “Later, Levi.”

He didn’t even feel the man’s punches. He barely comprehended how Moblit was pulled away from him and escorted outside by a man in a security uniform. He didn’t remember Erwin grabbing his hand and pulling him up, forcing him to sit on a chair in the hallway. He didn’t even notice how the doctor knelt at his level, asking him questions about things he couldn’t hear. The angry words uttered to him that night successfully numbed his senses, and he felt as though he was no longer living, but rather, just existing. 

“He’ll need some ice for his cheeks,” the doctor said as she rose, facing Erwin. “I’ll let the nurses know. I think it’d also be best to call any other remaining family and friends for support. We will update you once the surgery is over, and the police should come soon with a much more detailed report of the accident.”

“Thank you,” Erwin said, nodding as he shook the woman’s hand. “We appreciate it.” he pursed his lips and shook his head, “I’m very sorry about the actions of my friend. This was all too sudden for us.”

The woman nodded in understanding, glancing at Levi briefly. “I assure you, everyone is doing their absolute best to make sure the patient comes out fine. We do have the best there is. In the meantime, all we can do is wait and support one another. Now, if you excuse me, Mr. Smith.” 

She made her way past them and disappeared at the end of the hall, leaving the two tense men alone. 

Erwin stared at her disappearing figure before sighing. He rubbed his temples and took out his phone, pressing it next to his ear. After a couple of seconds, he spoke up: “Sorry to have woken you up, but you and Nanaba need to get to the hospital now. It’s Hange.” Erwin’s tone was a little more relaxed -- just by a tiny fraction, compared to his tone earlier with Levi. However, it still displayed the same sense of fear and urgency. “I’ll explain more later, but she got into a car crash around an hour ago. No, wait -- Mike -- calm down. She’s still fine. She’s in surgery right now.”

He ran a finger through his messy hair as he listened to the other end of the receiver. “Yeah, Levi and Moblit are already here. You’ll probably see Moblit outside -- there was some conflict and -- yeah, actually, that’d be great. I don’t know how long it’ll take but we’ll probably be here until the morning. Yeah, okay. Drive safe.”

After he ended the call and slipped his phone back into his pocket, he finally looked down at Levi. The latter still didn’t move, choosing to stare at the wall in front of him instead.

“She almost did,” Erwin said as if reading his mind. He sat next to his friend and crossed his arms, staring at the wall as well, “It happened around a little after twelve. She didn’t see the other vehicle until it was directly in front of her. She swerved just in time but,” Erwin paused, choosing his words yet again despite being known for his eloquence, “almost cut off a tree with the force of her impact. According to Moblit, the best we can hope for now is that she goes into a coma. The worst is brain death. Even death itself is a little more merciful than that if I’m being completely honest.”

“Later, Hange.” he spitted out after she shut the door behind her. He took out the object from his pocket and slammed it on the coffee table in frustration. He swiftly went to the kitchen and grabbed his cleaning supplies from under the sink and started scrubbing every single surface he laid his eyes on. 

Stupid four-eyes, he thought as he scrubbed violently. Don’t you realize that I’m the happiest when I’m with you? Wherever you’ll go, I’ll follow.

Hange Zoe was life itself. She was the breath of fresh air he didn’t realize he needed. She was the force that turned his life upside down and taught him how to live. He didn’t want to, but he found himself clinging onto that rope of hope, the hope that she was still alive. All they needed to do was fix the brokenness he caused, and he’d be there, welcoming her back into the world with open arms whether she wanted to or not. 

But he remembered, oh why did he remember now? 

He saw her kind eyes and her soft raven hair. He saw how she desperately held him close in her frail arms that night, whispering how it would all be okay, how she’d always be with him no matter what. As if, as if she already knew what was going to happen to her. 

He was a child, back then. He didn’t understand what she had meant. All he knew was that his mother was sad and that he wanted to take that pain away from her. He wanted to see her beautiful smile and hear her laugh. She held him tight as she closed her eyes, and he stared a little longer at her sleeping face -- not doubting her words that everything would be okay. 

He woke up the next morning. She didn’t. 

He finally met Erwin’s eyes. Those blue orbs held an overwhelming amount of emotions -- from fear to disbelief and even to anger -- but there was one thing that had tied them all together. And Levi hated it. 

It was resignation. 

“She’ll be fine,” Levi whispered, no, declared. Erwin studied him carefully, and although he didn’t look too convinced, he nodded. “I hope so.” 

He tore his gaze away from his old friend as a nurse approached him and handed him an ice pack. He grasped the object in his hands, letting the cold numb his fingers even more. It flashed back to him -- those hazel eyes and those cruel words. Hange was still alive. She was still in surgery. She was stable. But why, why did everyone around him act like she was already dead?

You killed her. You’ll go to hell for this.

“Why…” Levi choked out, his voice unrecognizable. “Why did..?”

“Why weren’t you called first? Why Moblit was so...” Erwin trailed off, pursing his lips. He let out a scoff and shook his head. “It was because Moblit had been on the phone with her when it happened,” he breathed in deeply, those blue eyes meeting his gray ones once again, “He had heard everything.”

[milktyama]

— ☕︎ FALL IN LOVE

a/n: ok this was originally an idea to mock my friend about her and her crush and then I realized i put too much effort and reminded me of Oikawa because him plus friends to lovers is an absolute YES

pairing: oikawa tooru x female reader, third!person

genre: fluff, slight angst, friends to lovers

wc: 1.5k

❥︎ slight swearing

Oikawa Tooru is a magnet for tough love. It’s not his fault; he’s always caught in the bad crowd, whether he likes it or not. But he has one person that sticks with him in all circumstances, L/n Y/n, his best friend.

Y/n is your happy-go-lucky that can’t take anything seriously, even during serious times. Though, she’s always witnessing her best friend get broken time after time. And it hurts; a lot. She wishes she could do more than just listen and maybe crack a joke here and there to lighten the mood.

One night, during their daily late night calls at ungodly hours, Oikawa opens up a little too much to Y/n; letting his emotions from his previous failed relationship overflow him.

“She just used me like a toy. I feel so dumb for falling for her tricks like that. She rubbed it on my face and even told all her friends, which I thought were also my friends, how much of a piece of shit I am. When can I find someone who won’t break my heart anymore?” Oikawa sighs as he brushes his long locks over his head. His hair glimmers in cool shades of blue reflecting from his LED lights in his room. Silence spreading eerily throughout the room. Why is she so quiet? He thought to himself. He rubs away the warm tears in his eyes as he slowly glances at his phone, seeing a single tear dropping from his best friend’s face. “Wait Y/n what’s wrong! Don't cry over my sad love story, this isn’t anything new...”

She sniffles hard and harshly wipes the single tear with her sleeve.

“Exactly why I’m crying. Tooru, I know I’m not great at being serious, but you can’t keep getting into these relationships that break you apart, because when I hear them, I break a little too.” tears choking up in her throat. She doesn’t last much longer until they start falling again. It just hurts a lot. Watching him in so much pain. But why does it hurt so much more tonight?

“Dumpling stop crying, you’ll make me feel even worse.” he coos, calling her by the nickname he gave her in attempts to help lessen her tears. He can’t watch her cry like that. Not her.

Oikawa sighs deeply, trying to find a solution to lift both of the aching pains in their hearts.

“Wanna come over and cuddle a little and watch movies? I can play Disney movies, your favorite.” he trails off, the corner of his lips lifting into a gentle smile to the screen of his phone. God, how much does she love that smile. She could look at it all day. Y/n looks up from her hands and shines a smile at her best friend. Her smile is just as beautiful as the autumn leaves turning into their beautiful burnt caramel red at the peak of fall. She shyly nods her head, embarrassed that she just cried so much in front of him.

“I’ll come pick you up in 10. Get ready and dress warm. It’s the peak of autumn and I don’t want you to catch a cold. Or… do you want my hoodie?”. She perks up at the statement. Intensely nodding her head, unconsciously clapping. Just how perfect can she get?

Ending the call after the elongated farewells, even though they will be seeing each other very soon. Oikawa hops off his chair and moves into his closet. He picks his favorite white hoodie and folds it neatly in half. She will look so adorable in this one. And it’ll be so big on her too. Oikawa chuckles and smiles to himself.

Y/n is not short. She is considered to be on the tall side for girls, but Oikawa just loves teasing her about it, especially since he is a solid head taller than her. He just loves laying his chin on top of her head, calling her minimizing nicknames suggesting that she is petite in height.

He makes his way to Y/n’s house and when he arrives, he texts her to come down. Y/n tiptoes her way down the stairs, quickly leaving a note for her mother in the kitchen counter that she will be at Oikawa’s. Opening the door, she is greeted by a chilling breeze of a fall night and his very tall and well built friend, with a hoodie hanging over his arm. He extends the hoodie to her and without another word, helps her into his hoodie that lingers with his scent. Y/n stuffs her nose into the clean hoodie, slightly warm from his body heat while carrying it. Fooling around the sidewalk, they walk back to Oikawa’s, hands in each other’s pockets because ‘the body heat will keep them warm’. They really just needed each other’s presence; the teary call from a few minutes ago fading from their heads.

Y/n jumps onto his plush bed, allowing her body to relax on the cloud-like surface, muscles releasing tension. Oikawa comes inside with select snacks and her head perks up. Of course he knows her favorites. Snuggling up onto one another, they watch the TV in peace; breathing became slow and his heartbeat pulsing against the side of her head. Hands interlocking with one another as his thumb gently rubs circles onto the back of her hand.

As the credits roll, he catches her mumbling to herself, palms clasping together and eyes tightly closed. Pressing his lips closer to her ear, he whispers out in a low tone.

“Dum dum what are you doing?” After a few seconds, she looks up through her lashes, eyes sparkling as a teasing smile curves at the edges of her thin lips.

“I’m praying to get a boyfriend like how the princesses get their prince charming!” He could only chuckle at her. Fuck she’s so adorable. How can someone mesmerize him as much as she did? She truly possesses some sort of power that allows him to feel this comforting heat swelling in his heart.

“Don’t be stupid, these are fairy tales ok? There won’t be a prince charming in a horse coming to your rescue. Plus, you are the last person to fall for such an act.”

“hEY that was mean! Let me just have my fantasies Lazykawa”. She rebuttals with a nickname for him of her own. It suits him; and his reactions were cute. Her attachment to his nickname was evident.

It was rather unintentional. After calling his nickname, Y/n brings her hand to the top of his head, slightly ruffling his hair while gently patting it at the same time. Her fingers brushing through his brown locks. She’s so enthralled by his hair and he’s too busy watching her expression that the space between has grown only shorter. Faces only a few centimeters away from the other, both of their gazes fixes on each other’s eyes, locking eye contact for what feels like an eternity.

Both of their breaths hitch and as if on queue, his hand gently rests on her left cheek, lifting her face up slightly. The world around them stops, as if they were the only people there. His free hand snakes around her waist, closing the gap even more. Snapping back to reality, she softly pushes against his chest, finally breaking eye contact.

“This… isn’t what friends do...” she mumbles under her breath, a deep shade of red tinting her cheeks. It was wrong. They were best friends and there were certain lines they cannot cross, no matter how close they are. He pulls away a little, as if agreeing to her statement, but why does she feel disappointed by it? Their bodies are still dangerously close together, Oikawa takes a leap of faith and brings his fingers under her chin, pulling her face up once more. Leaning into her ear, the words slips through his lips as if it were a melody.

“Well… do you want to stay as friends?” His words were gentle, yet possessive. His heart pounding against his rib cage; he really hopes he didn’t mess the bond with the one person he cared about most. She is everything to him. There is a sudden push, airing a little gap between them, and in that moment, regret flashes through his mind. He messed up didn’t he?

Well her actions say otherwise. Gripping onto the collar of his hoodie, she pulls him closer until their lips brush, pausing for a moment in case this isn’t what he wanted. Though the pause didn’t last long, as he gripped her waist once more, connecting their lips into a deep kiss full of emotion. Threading her hands through his hair, responding to his deep kiss with passion. The need for oxygen finally separates them, foreheads leaning to the other while panting. He gives one final peck in the middle of her forehead, looking at her eyes fondly whilst caressing her hand.

“So… it’s official now, my princess?” She nods in response to his question, slamming her body into his for an embrace, cuddling her face against his chest. Every year, they would spend time together like this, and this fall, was a particular special one full of love.

[disastermages]

this is part 9 of the au where Xiao Xingchen is the one to raise Wei Wuxian

--

Quiet voices outside their door make Xiao Xingchen and Song Lan pause in their nightly routine, their movements going still as they try to guess who the voices might belong to, though they both relax once they realize one of the voices belongs to their nephew.

“He’s back before curfew, barely.” Song Lan murmurs, coming to stand just behind Xiao Xingchen, a hand resting underneath his elbow. Smiling and huffing out a quiet laugh, Xiao Xingchen lets himself lean back against his husband.

“He got into trouble enough times for breaking it, he should have it memorized by now.” Xiao Xingchen says, shaking his head fondly. There’d been a laundry list of rules Wei Ying had broken that Xiao Xingchen had only just begun to dig through when they’d been caught in the forest, his mind trying to walk down the same paths Wei Ying’s had when the rule had been broken. “Who do you think he’s with?”

“I overheard Jiang Wanyin say something about a going away party in the dorms.” Song Lan says, his eyes squinting at the silhouettes cast by the light of the full moon. “Someone might’ve walked him back.”

Casting a look over his shoulder, Xiao Xingchen shakes his head. “A-Ying knows better than to let us catch him drinking or drunk, he would’ve stayed in the dorms until he sobered up.” As close as he’d been to coming and retrieving him then, Xiao Xingchen had written his nephew a letter longer than he’d truly intended, but it had gotten the effect he’d desired, even if it had surprised both himself and Song Lan.

“What are you thinking, then?” Song Lan asks, moving his hand from Xiao Xingchen’s elbow and onto his hip. Wei Ying seemed to be doing most of the talking, his voice naturally louder than whoever he was with, the most Xiao Xingchen and Song Lan could hear from them was a deep and low mumble, a sigh of their nephew’s name coming every once in a while if they truly listened.

The door is opening before Xiao Xingchen can voice any of the theories he’s managed to think up or admit that he doesn’t know, both he and Song lan separating immediately to try and look like they hadn’t been waiting as Wei Ying does his best to close the door silently behind him. His eyes are wider than Xiao Xingchen has ever seen them when he turns around, his back pressed against the door.

“Uncle Xiao! Uncle Song! I thought you’d be asleep.” Wei Ying laughs awkwardly, smiling as he tries and fails to nonchalantly drop something in his hand into his sleeve, but Xiao Xingchen doesn’t call him out for it, not yet.

Slowly Xiao Xingchen stops pretending to adjust the quilt on the bed, though Song Lan puts up the act of fluffing the pillows just a little while longer. “We were about to,” Xiao Xingchen nods, that much was the truth. When he steps forward, he can’t find the smell of alcohol anywhere around his nephew, and for that Xiao Xingchen is grateful, casting a quick, quiet look at Song Lan before he comes to stand right in front of Wei Ying. “Did you have fun with your friends?”

The smile drops off of Wei Ying’s face then, confusion taking over almost completely before he remembers himself, color dusting his cheeks. “The party...” Wei Ying says, smiling at his uncle sheepishly now, “I only went for a few minutes, there was something I had to talk to Lan Zhan about.”

That catches Xiao Xingchen’s attention, his eyes flicking back up to the door behind Wei Ying for just a moment. If they’d been together, had Lan Wangji walked Wei Ying back to the guest house? There was no possibility of writing off the way they looked at each other, even if it turned out to just be teenage flirtation.

“Is everything alright?” Song Lan speaks first, coming to stand next to Xiao Xingchen again, their knuckles and fingertips brushing quickly. It had been easier for the two of them, Song Lan had been allowed to wander as he pleased so long as he remained available to Baixue Temple for certain duties, Lan Wangji was one of the Twin Jades of Lan and his brother’s heir. It would be much, much harder for Wei Ying and Lan Wangji to have any kind of relationship while one wandered and the other stayed in one place.

Xiao Xingchen felt woefully unprepared whenever thoughts of guiding his nephew through heartbreak bubbled to the surface of his mind. Song Lan would step in if Xiao Xingchen couldn’t help him through it, Xiao Xingchen was sure of that much.

“Everything’s fine! Better than fine!” Wei Ying says, his voice almost too loud for the hour as he tries to press himself further back against the door. “We just talked, that’s all.” His hands are up in front of him, palms facing his uncles as he avoids their eyes. There was more, Xiao Xingchen was sure there was more, but Wei Ying’s face is turning a shade of pink that Xiao Xingchen is sure he’s never seen on his nephew, and the brushing of fingers turns into hand holding with a gentle squeeze.

It’s something silent that they’ve picked up somewhere along the way, they don’t need to look at each other for it to be understood. A squeeze back lets Xiao Xingchen know that the message has been received, a quick swipe of Song Lan’s thumb over the back of Xiao Xingchen’s hand to finish the conversation.

Smiling softly, Xiao Xingchen pushes down the thoughts of his nephew getting hurt and heartbroken, “Did the two of you tell each other everything that needed to be said?” He keeps his voice gentle, when he’d gotten Wei Ying’s letter in the middle of the night, he hadn’t known who’d he’d been thinking of when he wrote it, but he knew now, and he hoped the advice he’d been able to offer had been enough.

“We’re going to write letters for a little while.” Wei Ying nods, his head turning back to the door as if Lan Wangji were still standing there to hear him, though Xiao Xingchen was sure he’d hurried back to his own rooms, if only to avoid breaking curfew himself.

Xiao Xingchen was sure that if his sister were here, she’d be falling over herself laughing.

He’s not sure why he’s surprised at his nephew’s solution, it had worked for the four of them for almost a year hadn’t it? The simplicity of it makes his smile more relaxed, the tension melting out of his shoulders as he reaches forward, his hand resting on top of Wei Ying’s head. “I should have known my very wise nephew would have a solution ready.” If Lan Wangji was able to make his nephew happy, Xiao Xingchen could push aside his hesitations and doubts, even if they pulled at his sleeves the way A-Qing did when she was impatient. “We’ll have to think about including Gusu on our normal routes from now on, won’t we?”

They’d come during the summer, Xiao Xingchen quickly decides, thoughts of trudging through Gusu’s thick snow and bone chilling winds erasing any ideas he’d entertained within seconds.

“Really? You mean it?” Wei Ying finally comes off the door and Xiao Xingchen is laughing before he can stop himself, nodding as his nephew’s smile turns positively blinding. He’d already told Wei Ying he had his mother’s smile, but Xiao Xingchen is tempted to repeat it now.

“We can talk about it in the morning.” Xiao Xingchen says instead, his hand dropping back down to his side, “We have an early start in the morning, go get ready for bed.” It wouldn’t matter if Xiao Xingchen left Wei Ying at Gusu for one year or two, his nephew would still put up a fight over being woken up before sunrise.

Xiao Xingchen and Song Lan are already settled in bed by the time Wei Ying lays down in the extra bed that had been brought in once the healers had accepted that he wouldn’t return to his own room, no matter how much they prodded him.

The last candle has already been blown out when Wei Ying speaks again, “Uncle Xiao? Can we visit my mom and dad after we leave?” Wei Ying doesn’t sit up, but Xiao Xingchen does, leaning up on his side and only pretending to think about it.

“It’s been a while since we’ve gone, hasn’t it?” The first time they’d gone to Lotus Pier, it had taken Jiang Fengmian almost a week and a half to tell them that he’d managed to recover the bodies and swords of his sister and brother in law and bury them there. It had taken every bit of learned and natural patience for Xiao Xingchen not to throttle him on the spot.

Wei Ying hadn’t known what to say that first time, he’d looked at Xiao Xingchen for direction, but the only thing he’d been able to tell his nephew was that he should speak from the heart, smiling as he stroked Wei Ying’s hair out of his face. Cangse would’ve wanted to see him clearly, she would have fussed with his hair far more than Xiao Xingchen did, he could speak from experience.

“Of course we can.”

~

“Mama, Baba, I’m sorry for not visiting for so long,” Wei Wuxian speaks aloud as he kneels between his parents’ graves, his hands resting on his knees and Suibian resting at his side, “Sect Leader Jiang offered to send me to Cloud Recesses with Jiang Cheng and Jiang Yanli, and Uncle Xiao agreed after I told him I wanted to go.”

Once, after he’d caught him alone, Sect Leader Jiang had asked Wei Wuxian to call him Uncle Jiang instead, but Wei Wuxian hadn’t been able to do it, the change in titles didn’t come easily and Sect Leader Jiang remained Sect Leader Jiang, only now with a vague look of disappointment in his eyes.

“Grandmaster Lan told me that I’m just like you, Mama.” Wei Wuxian speaks again, smiling at the memory of the old man’s finger in his face, at the memory of barely dodging a book that had been thrown at his head in a fit of frustration, “I don’t think he meant it as a compliment at first.”

He almost certainly hadn’t, but Wei Wuxian had taken it as one, just like he’d taken pride in the fact that he’d managed to leave him red faced and fuming. Other, far more fond, stories had come later, after Grandmaster Lan and Wei Wuxian had come to an understanding with one another. There hadn’t been any more books thrown at his head after that.

“I met someone while I was there.” Wei Wuxian speaks quickly now, smiling as the wind catches the smoke from the incense sticks and blows it back in his face. “He’s a fuddy duddy like all the other Lans, but I like him so much. I wish you could meet him. I think you would like him, Baba.”

Wei Wuxian was guessing, he could only hope that his father would like Lan Zhan. Uncle Xiao had told him everything he could think of about both of his parents, and Sect Leader Jiang only ever gave him breadcrumbs of information, like anything more would be too painful to talk about.

There was more, Wei Wuxian was sure he was forgetting things, but the sun was going down, and he’d already gone last on purpose, sending Uncle Xiao and Uncle Song ahead and telling him that he would watch A-Qing for a while.

To his younger sister, Cangse Sanren was a fairytale, one that she’d learned from the stories that Wei Wuxian repeated from his uncle, she had no reason to kneel in front of her grave and bow to her. They’d played hide and seek while they waited, though during the last round, Uncle Xiao had been the one to find Wei Wuxian, smiling as he told him it was his turn.

He’d wanted to come back from Gusu with stories for A-Qing and his parents, but sitting in front of their graves now, Wei Wuxian can’t seem to remember half of what he’d meant to tell them, the smile dropping off his face as he leans back on his heels, eyes glancing up at the pink-orange sky.

There’s a warm hand on his shoulder before he can remember properly, and Wei Wuxian jumps despite himself, only relaxing once his eyes meet his uncle’s.

“It’s starting to get dark.” Uncle Xiao says gently, stating the obvious, though he kneels down next to Wei Wuxian, uncaring if his white robes get dirtied. “Do you need me to bring you a lantern?”

There wasn’t a doubt in Wei Wuxian’s mind that his uncle would bring him a lantern if he asked for it, but he shakes his head with a smile, looking at his parents’ graves one more time. “I was only finishing up here.” Wei Wuxian says cheerfully, grabbing Suibian from where it lays as he stands.

His uncle straightens right along with him, a smile of his own on his face as a breeze comes and sweeps the leaves off the graves. “Are you sure? We don’t mind waiting if you want to tell your mother how many rules you broke, A-Ying.” Uncle Xiao says, laughing at his own joke when Wei Wuxian grins back at him. “I think she’d be proud.”

Wei Wuxian can’t help but look down, then, the smile on his face less of a grin now.

“Zewu-jun told me that they added a thousand new rules after Mama left.” Wei Wuxian says, following his uncle back down the hill they’d climbed up earlier, the fading light making the path harder to follow, but not by much.

“And I’m sure A-Ying has added a thousand of his own.” Uncle Xiao says, smiling widely at his nephew.

It wasn’t a reprimand, Wei Wuxian was certain of that.

~

“Is this something they taught you in Gusu?” Song Lan asks, watching as Xiao Xingchen sits across from their nephew, their hands not touching just yet.

“Sort of,” Wei Ying says, leaning forward and grabbing at the tattered book laying next to his knee, notes scribbled in every corner and diagrams littering empty spaces wherever they could’ve been found.

Xiao Xingchen could only feel sympathy for anyone who dared to try and read his nephew’s notes, or perhaps it was pity.

“I heard about Inquiry from Lan Zhan, but he wouldn’t show me how to play it, so I thought I could make my own version of it.” Wei Ying turns the pages over as he speaks, looking for something specific that he’d written down, though he only seems to find it once he turns the notebook upside down in his hands.

It had been Song Lan’s rule that Wei Ying test his talismans and spells on one or both of them before he tested them on spirits, and Xiao Xingchen had agreed. They were safer than any spirit could ever be.

“Tell us how it works, A-Ying.” Xiao Xingchen says, his hands resting on his knees, Wei Ying had already explained it once, quickly, and in the middle of the night when the idea had come to him. Xiao Xingchen had tried his best to understand what was being explained to him, but there were pieces missing now that he was wide awake.

“Spirits aren’t able to lie when Inquiry is performed, but they can choose not to answer if they don’t want to or if they don’t know.” Wei Ying explains, his mouth pressing into a fine line as he tries to concentrate on the notes in front of him, “Empathy is supposed to let the spirit show me specific memories, but I need someone who can bring me out of it after a certain amount of time has passed.”

It sounded simple enough when it was explained like that, but theorizing about something, talking about it, and actually doing it were three different things. Opening up one’s own mind to spirits was something different entirely. Wei Ying would have to perfect it on the living before Xiao Xingchen would even consider letting him try it on some wayward spirit.

Even knowing that, though, Xiao Xingchen wouldn’t pretend that he hadn’t thought up specific memories to show his nephew, his hands suddenly itchy on his knees. When Wei Ying had first brought up the concept of Empathy, he was supposed to sit with Song Lan and Xiao Xingchen was meant to act as a tether to them both, but things had gotten jumbled along the way, and now Song Lan was to be their tether.

“I’m ready.” Xiao Xingchen says, forcing himself to let go of the breath he’d been holding, looking up at his husband and smiling. “We agreed on half an hour, right, Zichen?” Half an hour would be enough to let Wei Ying see those specific memories, anything shorter than that wouldn’t allow their nephew to take accurate notes and improve on Empathy.

“Half an hour,” Song Lan confirms, “anything longer and I’m breaking the connection.” He looks between the two of them as he speaks, a fair warning for a fair concern. Wei Ying nods and raises his hands up slowly, turning them palm up and Xiao Xingchen smiles, taking a deep breath as he pulls himself into the center, his eyes falling closed in time with his nephew’s.

"You'll meet one of my older disciples once we reach the top of the mountain." Baoshan Sanren says, her hold on Xiao Xingchen’s hand firm and sure of herself as she guides him up the rocky path. "She likes to play tricks, but she'll treat you kindly and look after you."

She didn't expect him to respond, in the two weeks they'd walked together she hadn't expected him to respond, but the words come out of Xiao Xingchen’s mouth before he can stop them. "Is she nice?" He didn't even know the name of his new sect sister, but he couldn't stop himself from asking, his grip on his new grandmaster's hand tightening.

Baoshan Sanren stops and looks up towards the sky as if she were trying to guess the incoming weather. "Cangse is colorful." Baoshan Sanren says finally, looking into Xiao Xingchen’s eyes. She does not smile, but there's something warm in her eyes.

Xiao Xingchen is only five years old, but he trusts that warmth, it was the same warmth she'd shown him when she offered him her hand. They're halfway up the mountain when she decides the path is too narrow and too rocky for the two of them to walk side by side anymore, helping him onto her back and telling him to hold on tight instead.

There are more questions he wants to ask. He wants to know how many other disciples there are on the mountain, he wants to know how she knew where to find him, he wants to know why she was able to appear so suddenly.

Before he can so much as breathe a single one of those questions, a girl dressed in bright blue is bounding towards them, a wide grin on her face as she skitters to a stop. Her arms fold behind her back innocently as she leans forward on tiptoe to look Xiao Xingchen in the eye. "I got your butterfly, is this him, Mama?"

“Grandmaster will do, Cangse.” Baoshan Sanren sighs, sounding as though they’d had this conversation dozens of times already. “I told you to stay at the summit.” Baoshan Sanren tries to walk past her then, but she only walks close behind, her eyes mischievous when Xiao Xingchen meets them.

“The more you tell me to do something, the less I want to do it.” His new sect sister says, and Xiao Xingchen feels himself grip their grandmaster’s robes tighter.

If Baoshan Sanren answers the obvious taunt, Xiao Xingchen doesn’t hear her. “I’m Cangse,” She murmurs to him quickly, reaching forward and brushing stray hairs out of Xiao Xingchen’s face, her grin turning gentle, but only for a moment. “You’re my first little brother.”

She hadn’t called him shidi, she’d called him didi, and Xiao Xingchen can feel himself curl against their grandmaster’s back.

“I’m Xiao Xingchen.” He says quietly, unable to look away from those bright eyes until she looks away first.

Cangse is colorful. That was how their grandmaster had first described his sister, Xiao Xingchen remembers that now.

“Why do you call Grandmaster “Mama”? She doesn’t like it.” Cangse had led him out to one of the fields after their last lesson of the morning, her hair and pink robes fanned out around her as she lays in the grass.

“That’s why I do it.” Cangse answers simply, she doesn’t even open her eyes for a few moments, not even when Xiao Xingchen calls her name, not when he calls her Shijie, she doesn’t continue until he calls her Jiejie.

“Why shouldn’t I call her Mama? I’ve been with her since I was a baby.” There’s a note of something in Cangse’s voice as she speaks now, her eyes staring upwards into the sky, though she doesn’t look as if she’s questioning it the way Xiao Xingchen had seen their grandmaster do.

Shuffling forward on his knees, Xiao Xingchen comes to lean over her, staring into her dark eyes, his eyebrows knit together. “She didn’t find you?”

“She found me.” Cangse argues, reaching up and running her thumb between Xiao Xingchen’s eyes in one quick move. “In a basket in a field somewhere, that’s the story she’s always told me, and she’s always taken care of me like a mother would. I think.” His sister shrugs after she finishes, crossing her arms over her stomach and closing her eyes again.

In the two years he’d been on the mountain, Xiao Xingchen had learned that that meant his sister was done talking about something. It didn’t mean she wanted an apology, it only meant she was done talking.

“Do you remember your parents, A-Chen?” The quiet of her voice catches Xiao Xingchen off guard, his sister was loud, anything less than her usual volume felt like they were trading secrets.

“I don’t remember their faces. I only remember that they wore straw hats.” Xiao Xingchen admits, twisting blades of grass around his fingers and pulling them up with little resistance. “I think they were farmers.” His birth parents were a blurred spot in his mind, hands reaching out for him without recognition or voices.

For a long moment, it seems as though Cangse doesn’t have anything else to say, her eyes are only half open, and he thinks she might’ve fallen asleep in the field like she usually did, but then, her voice is coming again, back to her usual volume as she smiles. “Being a farmer sounds nice, don’t you think?”

Xiao Xingchen is the one who doesn’t answer now, at least until his sister throws a fistful of grass at him and rolls away when he tries to retaliate.

“I’m sorry, Didi, I have to go.” The next time Xiao Xingchen opens his eyes, bleary and heavy with sleep, Cangse is eighteen and kneeling beside his bed in the middle of the night. She’s smiling sadly at him, a bag hanging off the side of her shoulder and her green robes easily identifiable in the dark.

Sitting up, Xiao Xingchen frowns at his sister and shakes his head, “You don’t have to do anything.” If he sounds petulant when he speaks, Xiao Xingchen will blame it on being woken up in the middle of the night, instead of admitting to some childish fear of being left behind.

Cangse’s smile only gets sadder then, her hand reaching up and stroking his hair away from his face, and Xiao Xingchen can see that her eyes are wet. “I have to do this.” Cangse repeats, her hand pulling away painfully slowly, as if she didn’t actually want to. “I can’t stay here my whole life, A-Chen, you’ll understand one day.”

Xiao Xingchen didn’t want to understand, he knew that much even then, but he couldn’t force himself to be angry at his sister.

“Will I see you again after this?”

“Maybe, Maybe not.” Cangse says quietly, she wouldn’t make promises she couldn’t keep, Xiao Xingchen had always admired that about her. “You have to call her Mama when you tell her that I left in the morning.” Cangse is speaking quickly now, reaching for and grabbing Xiao Xingchen’s hand as she forces any uncertainty out of her voice, “If I can’t get on her nerves one last time, I don’t know what I’ll do with myself.”

“Shijie,” Xiao Xingchen groans, trying to sit up straighter, but she pushes him back down. He’d wanted to argue with her, she always got him in trouble whenever she decided he should call their grandmaster that.

“Promise me, Xingchen.”

There’s a quiet desperation in his sister’s voice that kills any arguments on Xiao Xingchen’s lips, and he feels himself nodding.

“I promise.” Xiao Xingchen says, still propped up on his elbows when Cangse smiles at him again.

“Good, now go back to sleep.” Before he can stop her, Cangse runs her thumb between his eyebrows with a brush of her spiritual energy, and suddenly, Xiao Xingchen’s body is heavy and his eyelids heavier.

He doesn’t get to see or hear her leave, the door to his room closes silently behind her.

“I always hated it when she did that.” Xiao Xingchen says, pulling his hands away from Wei Ying’s slowly and reaching up to rub at the spot on his forehead. He could still feel it, even after they’d pulled out of the Empathy session, and he watches with a smile as Wei Ying reaches up and does the same.

“Did Mama do that a lot?” Wei Ying asks, trying his hardest to hide the way he wipes the tears off his cheeks, Xiao Xingchen lets him have it.

“Mostly when she wanted to win an argument.” He confirms, smiling as he nods, casting a quick glance up at Song Lan, his eyes softening even more. “You couldn’t keep arguing with her if you were sleeping, and by the time you woke up, she’d already forgotten about the argument.”

“I always wanted to know where his bad memory came from.” Song Lan teases, kneeling down next to the both of them, and smiling when Wei Ying finally laughs, his shoulders shaking as the smile comes back to his face.

Xiao Xingchen doesn’t stop himself from leaning forward and resting his hand on top of Wei Ying’s head, fingers combing through his hair like he used to do when Wei Ying was younger.

His nephew only bows his head and leans into it, and Xiao Xingchen can feel something warm twist in his heart.

Stories had been nice, but Empathy was something different entirely.

~

They’re somewhere between Meishan and Yueyang when they hear a screech above their heads, all eyes pointed towards the sky as a smokey, black bird circles around them, dipping lower and lower on each pass, until A-Qing starts to wiggle and fight trying to get down from her older brother’s back.

“Xian-gege, what is that?” She pulls at his robes as she asks, squinting and trying hard to concentrate as she catches sight of something in the bird’s claws. “It’s holding something.”

“It’s the Wen clan’s dire owl.” Wei Ying says, his hand reaching for his younger sister’s as his eyes follow the path the owl makes.

“What could it want with us? We aren’t subjects under Wen Ruohan.” Song Lan says, moving to stand closer to Wei Ying and A-Qing, though he doesn’t reach for Fuxue, his eyes meeting Xiao Xingchen’s, anxiety nipping at both of their heels.

Once the dire owl is close enough, it releases whatever it had been carrying, crying out again as it swoops back up into the wind and a tightly wound scroll all but falls into Wei Ying’s hand, though he nearly fumbles it.

Worry and curiosity climb higher and higher in Xiao Xingchen’s throat as he watches his nephew break the seal on the scroll, he doesn’t even have the mind to scold A-Qing for pulling at her brother’s sleeves.

“Wen Ruohan is dead.” Wei Ying says after a few moments of reading, confusion filling his eyes as he meets the stares of his uncles, the scroll still held tightly in his hands. “Wen Qing sent the owl to find us and ask us to come to Qishan.” Slowly, Wei Ying holds the scroll out to Xiao Xingchen, and he leans over to pick A-Qing up the second it’s out of his hands. “She wants our help with the investigation.”

Wen Qing’s calligraphy is careful and unmistakable, her request clear and obvious as Xiao Xingchen reads, Song Lan coming to stand over his shoulder even though their nephew had just told them the gist. She hadn’t said how His Excellency had come to pass, she’d only said she could offer more information if they agreed to make the journey to Qishan.

But she’d also given them an option to refuse, and that’s what makes Xiao Xingchen sigh. It would take them four days to arrive in Qishan, three if the mountain roads had been cleared of winter debris by now.

“Dafan Wen believe in repaying every kindness.” Xiao Xingchen says, echoing the words that Granny Wen had spoken years ago as he turns and looks at his husband. The conversation only lasts a few seconds, their fingers laced together already.

“We’ll have to be careful while we’re there.” Xiao Xingchen says, speaking slowly and deliberately to make sure he’s understood. “A-Ying, the next letter you write to Lan Wangji, I want you to ask him if he’s heard anything at all about this.” The death of the chief cultivator wasn’t something easily hidden, but something didn’t feel right about this, about any of it.

“Ask him to keep it a secret if you’re the first one to tell him.”

[kelyon]

Golden Rings 8: A Mayor

The Storybrooke Sequel to Golden Cuffs

Rumple has a chat with Regina

Read on AO3

After that disaster of a meal, the walk to City Hall gave Rumpelstiltskin time to cool his head. It was one thing to lose control in front of Mrs. Gold, the poor woman would just blame herself for any change in his behavior. But now he was strolling into enemy territory. Going eye-to-eye with the Evil Queen. He knew better than to blink. 

In the old world, there was no question that he was more powerful than Regina. She had learned her magic from him. Even then, the girl had a long list of grievances against a world that had, admittedly, treated her poorly. Rumpelstiltskin had trained her in the ways of dark magic, and that gave her the means to forge her anger into a weapon. Over the years, the queen had refined her rage, hammering her many resentments again and again until her pain was a folded blade, sharp enough to cut the world asunder.   

The most important lesson the Dark One had ever taught his protégé was that true power was the ability to cause pain. If hurting people didn’t make her happy, clearly the solution was to hurt more people. As Regina’s abilities had grown, so did her list of enemies and potential victims. Her wrath had expanded from targeting one little girl, to a small rebellion, to the whole realm.

Storybrooke was Regina’s ultimate victory, even over him. It was not enough for her to simply end the lives of her enemies. She had to torture those who had wronged her, prolong their suffering. For twenty-eight years, she had trapped them all in a world without time. A world where every day seemed exactly the same as the day before--except, somehow, worse. 

She had separated all of them from the people they had loved. She had forced them all to be the worst versions of themselves. She had destroyed their happiness in the hope that she would finally have some for herself.

Had it worked? 

Rumpelstiltskin had reached Main Street, the unofficial border between the old part of  town and the new. Regina lived in New Town, along with the rest of the Storybrooke elite. The castles of this world were made of drywall and stucco, and Mayor Mills lived in the grandest of them all. Did that satisfy her? Was it enough for her to be richer and more powerful than anyone else in town? Did she still feel like a Queen?

City Hall was in New Town as well, only a few blocks away from 108 Mifflin Street. That wasn’t the official residence for every mayor, but it was convenient that the only person who ever ran for the office lived within walking distance. 

Main Street was deserted at this late hour. Even Granny’s had only a few stragglers inside, lonely people lingering over cups of coffee before heading back to empty houses. The loudest noise on the street was the opening of the door from the offices of Dr. Archibald Hopper.

A little boy ran out onto the sidewalk, jabbering excitedly to a blonde young woman.

“I’m telling you, the first step is to figure out who people are. Once we know, then we can help them remember on their own. Then they can find their happy endings!”

“Okay, kid. Sure. We’re gonna suss out people’s secret identities from fairytale land. How?”     

“Don’t worry. It’s all in the book!”

The animated conspirators walked off. Neither one noticed the figure limping in the shadows behind them.

Well, Rumpelstiltskin thought. That was interesting. 

Gold recognized the boy as Henry Mills. Ten years ago--though to a cursed mind it couldn’t possibly have been ten years, my how time flies--Regina Mills had come to Gold and asked him to arrange for an adoption. She had demanded a newborn with no family, preferably from far away. She had wanted a closed adoption, with a birth mother who would never interfere with the life she had planned for the baby. 

It had been a tall order, but Gold had contacted a juvenile detention facility in Phoenix, Arizona. By some happy chance, one of their charges--herself an orphan who had spent her life in the foster care system and inevitably fell to a life of petty theft--had found herself pregnant. Gold had never gotten the name of Henry’s birth mother, but Rumpelstiltskin knew it well.

Emma Swan.

So that was why the Savior had come to town. 

And, apparently, the boy Henry had some idea of the true nature of the people around him. Was it because of this book he had mentioned? Or was reality obvious to anyone who  wasn’t blinded by the curse? Either way, the boy was trying to get Emma to help him make people remember who they were.

How very interesting.

The rest of the walk was easy. Rumpelstiltskin walked with a light step to City Hall. The lights were on in the Mayor’s office, but there was some activity in the garden around the back.

Rumpelstiltskin found the Queen on her knees, picking apples up off the ground. The sedate little garden had become a place of horticultural carnage. An entire branch of Regina’s prized apple tree was on the ground, with a fresh wound on the trunk. The grass was littered with sawdust and leaves and fallen fruit.

“What a mess.” Rumpelstiltskin announced his presence, walking into the enclosed space.  

Regina finished what she was doing before she stood up. “Not for long.”

There was a smile on her face, and a sharp gleam in her eyes. Rumpelstiltskin could read his pupil like a book. Despite the chaos around her, she was celebrating a victory. So far, she was happy. How fragile was that mood?

“This will all be cleaned up in the morning,” Regina said. “And the menace responsible is probably halfway back to Boston by now.”

“You don’t mean Emma Swan, do you?” Rumpelstiltskin circled the tree as he spoke. “I just saw her walking down the main street with your boy. Two of them looked thick as thieves.”

It was always a pleasure to see Regina’s smile vanish, and her satisfaction sour into spite. But now there was an extra thrill in watching her ire. She hadn’t changed at all. Twenty-eight years of getting everything she wanted, and Regina was just as insecure and petty as she had ever been.

Marvelous.  

“I told that woman to get out of my town.”

“Apparently, she didn’t follow your orders.” Reaching up into the tree, Rumpelstiltskin grabbed a low-hanging fruit and twisted the stem until it broke off in his hand. “That makes her rather a special person around here, don’t you think?”   

Regina ground her back teeth, an ugly habit she’d had for years. “I spent all day trying to get rid of her.”

“And you didn’t come to me?” Rumpelstiltskin tossed the apple in the air and caught it in one hand. A whole day? No wonder the Queen was frustrated! Normally her will was worked much more quickly than that. Of course, she normally had help. “I thought you knew where to go when you needed something done.” 

She turned her back on him to examine her tree. “I don’t make deals with you anymore.”

“And what a shame that is for us both,” Rumpelstiltskin lied. “After all, we have such a grand history of working together for our mutual benefit.”

“Your ‘benefits’ aren’t always what they seem, Mr. Gold.” Regina smirked, like she was pointing out some undiscovered fact. “Even when you got Henry for me, now I find out that there’s this woman.”

He held the apple in the palm of his hand. “Children are known to have mothers--”

“I’m his mother!” She cut him off sharply, and he knew that look. If this was a world with magic, the Evil Queen would be throwing fireballs right now. Her anger was always so close to the surface. She had never learned how to hold back, how to sneak and plot and keep your enemies close. 

“Be that as it may.” He kept his voice friendly, the same tone Gold would use. “Next time you need something, I hope you’ll remember to call on me.”

She smirked again, that regal expression of amusement and disdain. It was one of her better masks. “Nice to see you so accommodating, Mr. Gold. I’m glad that woman hasn’t ruined everything in Storybrooke.”

He shook his head, all businesslike courtesy. “No matter what strangers may do, everyone needs a friend in low places.”

“And you are certainly the lowest,” Regina chuckled. The smallest show of deference was enough to restore her good humor. The slightest reminder of the power she thought she had. “By the way, how is Mrs. Gold?”

“Quite well, thanks for asking.” He looked her in the eye and lied to her face. His masks were better than hers and always would be. “She’s a little, ah, tied up, at the moment. But I’ll give her your regards once she’s free.”

“Please do. I always like seeing the two of you around town.”

Rumpelstiltskin polished the apple on the sleeve of his suit jacket. This type was called a Red Delicious, though Mayor Mills would tell people it was a Honeycrisp. She could tell people anything and they wouldn’t question her. 

He began to saunter out of the garden. He had seen everything he needed to see.

 “I wouldn’t worry about Emma Swan.” He left Regina with a reassurance that would only remind her of her real problem. “How could she possibly be a threat to you?”

He didn’t let Regina respond. He had asked her a question that would haunt her waking hours. Whatever happiness she had accumulated with her curse had popped like a balloon the moment the Savior had entered Storybrooke. 

All he had to do was watch the show. 

On his way out of the garden, he took one bite out of the apple. Red through it was, the fruit was far from delicious. It was bland and bitter, just like her. Rumpelstiltskin tossed the apple over his shoulder and left the Queen to the destruction that had once been her sanctuary. 

****

Heading back to the house, Rumpelstiltskin’s mind went to another dark sorceress: Maleficent, the self-styled Mistress of All Evil. She had certainly been the mistress of Regina. Once Regina’s husband was dead and Snow White had fled for her life, Regina had taken Maleficent as her lover publicly. No one in the kingdom had dared speak a word against it. For a time, the two of them were inseparable, their mutual adoration a force that would move mountains. And they liked nothing more than to exercise their power on anyone who was weaker than they were.

They had done it to Belle. Rumpelstiltskin’s heart burned at the memory. Long before he married her, he had let them take her. When Belle had trusted him completely, he had been too much of a coward to defend her. Because he couldn’t have let the queens of darkness know that he had feelings for the pretty girl whose body he had bought and paid for. He couldn’t have exerted any force to protect her from them. He couldn’t have even said that she belonged to him and he didn’t want to share. That would have been a sign of weakness, tantamount to admitting that he loved her.

And he couldn’t have allowed them to know the truth. His reputation, his pride, could not endure it. At the time, he couldn’t even admit it to himself. 

Belle had come back to him naked and bleeding, with a testimony of the worst kinds of torture. Every wound on her body screamed out his guilt. Every word of what she told him as an indictment of his failure. For weeks after she had suffered nightmares and attacks of fear--things he only learned about later, because he hadn’t wanted to hear it, and Belle hadn’t wanted to tell him. The selfless girl had stifled her own trauma for the sake of his ego.

On Rumpelstiltskin’s mountain of regrets, refusing to protect Belle from Regina and Maleficent was a towering peak. 

Of course, Belle wasn’t the only one. Reports and rumors kept circulating about that kingdom, of the horrors inflicted on anyone who stood up to the Queen, or got in her way or even attracted her attention. Fair maidens with dark hair began to stay out in the sunshine to tan their skin and lighten their tresses. They wanted to bear no resemblance to the truest target of Regina’s rage, the girl who always evaded her grasp.

Eventually it had become too much, even for Maleficent. She had left, returning to her own castle. When Rumpelstiltskin had paid a visit to her, the witch had seemed more disappointed than heartbroken.

“It just got boring, Rumple. The same things to the same people, over and over! And Regina was never satisfied, not with me or anyone else. Evil is evil, but a person’s got to feel appreciated for the work she puts in!”

Maleficent would have taken Regina back, he knew. If there was even the slightest hint that things could change, that Regina was capable of growing up. Maleficent would have offered Regina a twisted version of happiness, if only Regina had really wanted to take it. 

Sometimes, late at night while Belle was sleeping safely beside him, Rumpelstiltskin liked to imagine the reconciliation between the two queens. It was an inevitable moment. One way or another, destiny would bring them back together, at least one more time.

Regina would come to Maleficent. Perhaps she would say she was sorry, that she wanted a new start. Perhaps she wouldn’t have to say anything. Maleficent’s eyes would glow with her green fire. And her smile would be of genuine joy. She would lower her defenses and welcome her lover with open arms.

Welcome Regina into her heart.

That image had comforted him through many nights when his mind was tormented by how the queens had tortured Belle. They would pay for all they had done to her. Even now, the thought filled him with vengeful contentment.

****

When he got back to the pink house in Old Town, Rumpelstiltskin found the place dark and quiet. The lights in the entryway were shut off, the candles in the dining room extinguished. The cold, fluorescent light in the kitchen was the only illumination on the first floor.

Plates and cookware were stacked on the counter by the sink. They were rinsed off, but not scrubbed. Gold didn’t trust his wife to wash his precious antiques. 

“Right,” Rumpelstiltskin said. 

In preparation to wash the dishes, he took off his suit coat and draped it over a kitchen chair. Then he removed the cuff links at his wrists and carefully folded up his sleeves. There were black rubber gloves inside the cupboard door underneath the sink. A green canvas apron hung from a hook by the stove. Gold was very fond of protection, of layers and separation. At last, there was something about him that Rumpelstiltskin could understand.

He took off Gold’s moonstone ring and put it in his trouser pockets with the cuff links. Now the only thing on his hands was his wedding ring, the golden band that had once been a shackle around Belle’s wrist.

Before he put on the rubber gloves, Rumpelstiltskin brought his knuckles up to his lips and kissed his ring. He had never removed it in the old world. It was as much a part of him as his own hand. He wouldn’t take it off here, either. The ring was proof that he was Belle’s husband. 

Belle’s husband, and Bae’s father. That was enough. When the world was right, that would be all he would need to be. 

Once the dishes were cleaned, dried, and put away, Rumpelstiltskin gathered his things and went upstairs. Mrs. Gold had said something about taking a bath. She was surely done by now. If he was lucky, she would already be asleep and he wouldn’t have to talk to her again.

It was the end of Rumpelstiltskin’s first full day in Storybrooke. He was already tired, already heartsick, already waiting for the Savior to do her job and free them all.     

The red lamp was burning in the parlor of the bedroom suite, just as it had been the night before. Mrs. Gold had turned it on to welcome her husband. The bedroom was dark, save for a beam of light that shone from the half-open bathroom door.

“Is that you, Mr. Gold?” Belle’s voice came from the bathroom, as well as the faint sound of sloshing water. The whole bedroom smelled like some kind of artificial perfume--the expensive bath oils that Mrs. Gold liked to buy.

“Do a lot of visitors come into this bedroom?” Rumpelstiltskin stayed on the other side of the door and began to undress. 

Mrs. Gold chuckled, the way Belle did when she was relaxed and comfortable. “I never know when you might send someone over to surprise me.”

He winced at that, at the casual way she suggested the possibility. Gold had never allowed another man or woman to touch his wife, but it always seemed to be on the horizon. That was the next barrier to cross, the next thrill for Gold to seek. He had prepared Mrs. Gold to expect it. At any moment, he might invite some stranger into their home--into their bed, into her body--and her task would be to be a welcoming hostess. 

Regina had made it that way. Everything about this marriage was her design, a reflection of what she had seen of him and Belle. It was possible that the torment was supposed to come from how much Gold and his wife both wanted to sleep with more people, but couldn’t find anyone in Storybrooke willing to indulge them.

“I’m almost done shaving,” Mrs. Gold called from the bathroom. “Then I think I could use some lotion. It’s getting colder now. I gotta keep soft and moisturized.”

She was inviting him to rub her down, to put his hands all over her silky skin and cover her body with a slick, sweet-smelling substance. They had done this so many times, in this world as well as the old one. He had made her soft and smooth and warm. He had found her wet and willing and open. His wife wanted him. She was offering herself to him. She loved him and he loved her and joining their bodies together was the most natural thing in any world…

“Fuck,” Rumpelstiltskin whispered as he pulled his pajama pants up over his hardening cock. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. Then, more loudly, he said to Mrs. Gold, “Actually, I think I’m going to go to sleep. You take as much time as you need.”

For a moment, the silence from the other room threatened to swallow the whole of reality. 

“Oh,” she said at last. “O-okay, Mr. Gold. What--whatever you say.”

It hurt to hear the disappointment in her voice. But this was what he had to do. He couldn’t indulge in Mrs. Gold’s appetites--or his own. She wasn’t Belle. Doing anything more than sleeping next to her would be an unconscionable violation of Belle’s trust. 

And besides, that woman had no say over what she thought she wanted. Between the cursed personality Regina had devised and the cruel training Gold had inflicted, nothing inside of Mrs. Gold was real. She wasn’t a person, any more than Gold had been.

Rumpelstiltskin sighed, and got into bed. Maybe he could fall asleep before Mrs. Gold joined him. Or he could feign slumber until she went away to do something else. Would tomorrow be another day like this? And the day after that? Was he going to have to make excuses to this woman until the curse was broken? Coward that he was, he would run and hide from someone who thought she loved him.

He was still awake when Mrs. Gold came out of the bathroom. To her credit, she didn’t try to attract his attention. He had told her that nothing would happen tonight and she respected his decision--far more than Gold had ever respected any of hers. But she still strode across the bedroom to get to the armoire in the parlor. Gold had never made room in his closet for her clothes. 

The light from the bathroom illuminated her body. Her hair was wrapped up in the microfiber towel she had bought specifically for that purpose. Aside from that, she was completely naked. 

He should have looked away. He should have turned his face to the wall and closed his eyes until she put on a nightgown. But he hadn’t seen Belle in twenty-eight years. His wife, his beauty, his light in the darkness.

For a moment, he filled his eyes with her. Hiding in the darkness, he didn’t conceal his interest. He saw it all. Belle’s neck, her shoulders, her slim arms and round breasts. She was so pale and smooth, a statue carved from alabaster. The gentle slope of her belly and the soft curves of her waist and hips. Her long, lovely legs. And between her legs…

Rumpelstiltskin blinked. 

Bile rose in his throat.  

He clenched his jaw, and rolled over in bed. He couldn’t look at her for another second. 

Between her legs, Mrs. Gold was bare and hairless. Like a child. Gone were the wiry curls that used to hide Belle’s treasures. He used to enjoy running his fingers through them, to tease his wife before he began to play with her properly.

It was a style in this world, for a woman to shave or wax her pubic hair. Men thought any hair on a woman’s body was unfeminine or even unhygienic. Apparently Gold was one of those fools. 

But even worse for Rumpelstiltskin was the memory of when Belle came back from her time with the queens. She had been bare then as well. It had taken weeks for her hair to grow back. She said that Maleficent and Regina had shaved her with broken glass. That they had pulled out any stubble by the roots.

Belle had not described the pain, but he could imagine it.

He didn’t know if Mrs. Gold had put on a nightgown before she got into bed. She didn’t touch him or try to speak to him. She probably thought he was angry with her. And while Rumpelstiltskin did seethe with fury, Mrs. Gold had very little to do with it.

Regina. The name pounded through his mind, until the very instant he succumbed to sleep. Regina will pay for all of this. 

****

He is in a cell, in the deepest dungeons of Snow White’s castle. The cell is enchanted, so his magic is useless. It is a dripping cave, carved from solid rock. There are no other prisoners nearby. The guards are stationed at the other end of a long corridor. The only time he ever sees a living soul is when people come to him for help.

He is exactly where he wants to be. 

“I tried your curse,” the Evil Queen rants from the other side of the pointed bars. “It didn’t work!”

“Considering we’re all still here, I should think that’s rather obvious, dearie!”

The Queen snarls at him. Her dark jewels glint in the torchlight. “You know why it didn’t work.”

“Well, I can make an educated guess...”

“Then tell me!”

Leaning back against the rough stone wall, he chuckles at the Queen’s demands. 

“There’s a price to that, dearie.”

She sneers. “Name it.”

“When--” He stops. He makes a show of changing the word. “If you can cast this curse, you will be creating a whole new world. Everything will be as you want it to be, Your Majesty.”

“I know that!” she snaps. “That’s the whole point! This world is stacked against me. This curse is the only chance I have to get my revenge!”

“Yes.” He grins at the Queen, and runs his tongue over his teeth. “You will control everything. All of our fates will be in your regal hands.”

“So what do you want?”

“Oh nothing much,” he waves his hand. “Only what I already have.”

“It��s a world without magic.”

“But not a world without power, yes? Not a world without wealth, or a world without comfort? Not a world without any pleasures at all?”

“Tell me what you want, imp.”

“It truly is a simple request,” he lies. “What is mine, stays mine. Everything I had before I came to this…” He gestures to indicate his captivity. “So the power, the wealth--”

“The woman?” The Queen smirks. “Is that what this is? You want to make sure you keep your little plaything!” Now she laughs. “Are you sure you still want her? She is a little worse for wear.”

“You made sure of that, Your Majesty.” His voice is low, but she doesn’t hear the threat.

“I could make you a lothario instead. Give you a new girl every night? That would be a punishment for quite a lot of people.” 

He moves so fast she cannot see him until he climbs the bars and grabs her by the throat, pulling her toward him. He growls at the Queen. He almost roars: “I. Want. My. Wife!”

The Queen jerks from his clutches, stumbles backwards to get away from him. Quickly, she allows haughtiness to mask her fear. 

“Fine,” she says stiffly. “She will be your wife in the new world, though that will not save you from the curse. Neither of you will remember a second of this place.”

“That’s not as cruel a fate as you might think, dearie.”

“Nevertheless.” She acts like that’s the end of an argument she has won. “Now: how do I cast this curse?”

“You need a heart, dearie.”

“Yes, I know that!” she snaps. “The heart of the thing you love most. I killed my own father and it didn’t work!”

“Poor Prince Henry.” He shakes his head. “He died as he lived: being betrayed by women who never loved him enough.”

“I did love him!” The Queen seems on the verge of tears. “Daddy was the only person who stood by me through everything!”

“Oh!” He widens his eyes and purses his lip in a mockery of her sorrow. “While it is true that the love between father and child can destroy worlds, that doesn’t seem to be enough. The curse doesn’t demand the thing you love much. You must give up the thing you love most.”

“Snow White killed the only other thing I ever loved.”

“Oh, then you’re in trouble, aren’t you, dearie?”  He giggles. “You don’t understand what you’re trying to do!”

“I’m trying to get revenge!”

“You’re trying to make yourself happy!” He grabs the bars of his cage. “You said it yourself, there’s nothing for you in this world. You think you have no choice but to destroy everything here and start over. Do that, and you’ll lose things, dearie. What you love most is just the first step.”

“But I have nothing to love!”

“And nothing loves you? No one loves you, Your Majesty? No one in this world wants to make you happy? No one would embrace you, if only they thought you might embrace them back?”

She begins to speak, then stops. Her royal countenance freezes. He can see the thought blossom in her mind.

“There it is!” he cackles. “You know what you love, dearie. Now… Go kill her!”