#never getting over this... never getting over HIM
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18+ only please and thank you
Roommate Ghost whoâs basically a rehomed cat.
You barely saw him at first. Heâd come out of his room to do laundry, and youâd occasionally spot the back of him as heâs leaving for work, but otherwise it was like living with a ghost. A large, moody ghost who seemed to think eye contact was an unforgivable breach of privacy.
So you did the obvious thing, and coaxed him out with food. Youâre lonely, he seems nice enough, and heâs also just conveniently there. Itâs no big deal to make something that smells really wonderful when heâs home, and hope heâll take the bait.
It takes three whole entire dinners. Two delicious meals without so much as a stir from his room, and youâre just about to give up on the whole scheme, when youâre finally rewarded with a tousled head poking out of his room on the third attempt.
âWant some?â you immediately pipe up, giving him an encouraging smile while you scoop noodles into your bowl. Realizing your mistake, you quickly relocate your gaze back to the food, so as not to scare him off.
Cmon, take the bait. Come on out, kitty. You know you want it.
Silent as ever, your massive roommate indeed emerges to fill his belly.
A soft, âThanks,â is all you get for your efforts, but it thrills you. You sit there practically vibrating with glee, trying to play as cool as possible while you both eat and purposefully donât speak to each other. Thereâs just chewing and silence, and the quiet clatter of spoons and forks, and you love it.
The next day, the contents of your personal grocery list have magically appeared in your refrigerator. The meat you needed, vegetables, your special milk for your cereal. Bemused, you step over to your pantry and verify that, yes, he got the dry stuff too. You werenât planning to cook anything fancy two days in a row, but hell, if heâs around again tonight, you might as well.
But heâs not around. You donât see him again for several weeks, never even got a text that he was leaving. You were just starting to make progress, and now itâll all be erased when he returns. You lost your one window of opportunity for building trust, and itâll be back to silence, back to emptiness, back to being strangers.
But to your surprise, when he does finally come home, he meows at you.
Not officially. Not in, like, actual cat language, but he drops his bag by the door and responds to your quiet greeting with a heavy sigh, and, "Itâs good to be back.â
You canât help the grin that spreads across your face, so you quickly hide it by staring at the TV.
He joins you for dinner the next time you cook. And the next. Groceries pop up like spring flowers, anything you write down, even if itâs snacks he never touches.
He starts hanging out with you while you cook. On the other side of the counter at first, looming like a dark shadow, just listening to your music and offering answers to your small talk.
You keep it light. Keep it friendly and easy, and entice him over occasionally to taste what youâre making. He starts lingering closer, letting the kitchen light touch him, leaning against your side of the counter. The scary side.
And then one day he tells you a joke. Just completely out of the blue, âWhat do you call an angry carrot?â
âUhhâŚâ you pause peeling carrots for a second, trying to wrap your head around some scenario where this is a legitimate question, because surely he's not about to tell you an actual joke. âI dunno?â
âA steamed vegetable.â
You return to your carrots with a delighted laugh. He's being friendly, he's making jokes! Best not comment on the progress he's made, because you donât want to scare him off.
Good luck with that.
He starts following you around like an actual stray cat. You canât bear to close the door on him, so heâs just always there, hanging out in the doorway, telling you little bits about his day while you brush your teeth for bed. He doesnât talk a whole lot, prefers to listen to you yap, but heâs shut in his room less and less.
Except for the bad times. Simon goes through phases where he recluses himself again. Sometimes itâs only a few hours, other times itâs days, but he occasionally needs time to himself, and you donât mind. You still get a thrill every time he appears again, metaphorically meowing at you and rubbing up against your leg.
God, you wish he would. You could use some good leg rubbing, actually.
Is he the rubbing type? Heâs never made a pass at you, never touched you at all, and even the times when youâve hung out together in your room, he always stood politely in the doorway. Always turned his head to the side when youâve had to open your underwear drawer or spilled sauce on your shirt and had to strip it off. Heâs just like that, always aware of your personal space and his, uncomfortable about the two bubbles touching without warning.
When it finally happens, it's you who's surprised.
You've just halted mid-step in the middle of the kitchen, staring down at the corner of the cabinets because you swear you just saw something move.
When all of a sudden, and actual mouse scampers across the floor, doing erratic zig zags like it's too scared to decide where to go, and all you can do is scream because it's coming right for you--
A thick arm clamps around your stomach, and your feet abruptly lose contact with the floor. You've completely lost track of the mouse, you're just frozen in shock from the fact that your whole back is glued to Simon's side, and he doesn't even bother to hold you up with both arms as he swivels around searching for where the mouse went.
"Thanks," you squeak, patting his forearm as a signal to put you down. "You're really strong, holy shit."
He grunts like he doesn't agree. "Doesn't take much to lift somebody."
Your feet touch back down to the linoleum, and you just hope your hot face isn't too evident. "Right, uh huh. Cause I could definitely lift you."
"Probably could."
You eye him skeptically, all the way from his socks, to the always-mussed hair at the top of the mountain. "I don't feel like throwing out my back, but thanks for the offer."
"I wasn't offering."
It's just small talk. Regular jokes, with his usual deadpan delivery, but you swear there was something he meant to say in those words. You try to discern them, gazing up into those brown eyes that don't mind meeting yours anymore.
It's hanging in the air, the thing he meant to say. You don't want to try and guess. It's too risky, and you might hurt yourself if you get it wrong.
"What is it, Simon? What's wrong?"
His eyes stutter for just a second, like he's ripping himself out of a train of thought. "I think you should hide in your room while I find that mouse."
Stupid, cockblocking mouse.
You don't sleep well that night. You keep thinking about your quiet roommate, end up having to jerk off at two in the morning just to get a little bit of relief, and your sleep is fretful even after that.
You ask about the mouse the next day, and he swears he not only caught it, but released it in the woods a mile away. There's absolutely no telling if he's pulling your leg or not, so you just drop it, too absorbed in the questions that were haunting you all night.
"I'm not good at... fucking."
Your head snaps up, staring wide eyed at Simon's troubled expression across the table. "What?"
"I've never been with a woman before. At least, not... like this. Wager I'll make a fool of myself, so I might as well get it out in the open."
"Oh. Um." Your heart is pounding, your mind whirling to comprehend how you got here so suddenly. He looks so scared, holding himself rigidly into place without so much as blinking, and you're taking far too long to answer at this point.
"I'm good at it," you finally tell him, hoping it sounds more comforting and less like a brag. "We can figure it out together, if it's something you want to do."
"Okay."
It takes a little while to get there. Some time to find a natural moment to take his hand in yours, for him to return the gesture by wrapping his arm around your waist and bringing your body over to his. But then his hand finds the back of your neck, and he's definitely not a beginner at kissing.
You've wanted it for so long, imagined it so often, that the press of his body against yours almost feels familiar. The seeking movements of his lips, the soft breaths coasting over your cheek. It's quiet and slow, in the corner of your shared kitchen.
He tucks your body into his, lets you saturate yourself in each second of this moment while you both learn the way the other likes to kiss. You end up in your bed soon after, just for the sake of comfort and lining up your mouths a little more conveniently.
It's easy to lose yourself in the safety of him. Your body feels at home in the muscled softness of his, in the thoughtful, patient movements of his hands exploring under your clothes. It feels like he's belonged to you far sooner than today.
His first time isn't perfect, but he makes up for his inexperience by taking his time. Laughs at your breathless, "a hole is a hole" statement, and insists on exploring with his mouth and fingers first.
Simon makes the prettiest noises when he finds your wetness waiting for him. He seems to enjoy the feeling of it on his fingers, sliding them in and out so carefully, studying the textures inside you. He tastes his own fingers, less like a scientist and more like a little kid who's discovering new flavors in the sandbox.
He makes a sound then, a warm, rumbly one, and then pulls his fingers out of his mouth to lean down and find your clit with his lips.
A hole is a hole, but there's something special about whispering little cues at him in the dark, and the way he efficiently adjusts himself, ever the dedicated soldier. A hole is a hole, but you cum like that, with your roommate's strong hand gripping your hip, and his mouth accomplishing exactly the motion you need to draw a slow, brain-melting orgasm out of you.
"Yeah, just like that," you pant a few moments later, shoving his face away from your oversensitive pussy.
Just like that.
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ŕ¨ŕ§ â Every damn morning like clockwork, 5:45 AM. Tiny fingers pry one of Sukunaâs eyelids open, a small face hovering inches from his own. Her hair still wild from sleep, cheeks flushed with excitement, "Papa! Wake up!" Small hands nudging him while clutching her pink brush and collection of scrunchies against her pjs, "Hair time!"
Sukuna clicked his tongue, a massive hand engulfing her tiny face as he gently pushed her back, "Go back to bed, brat."
"Nooooo!" She whined, pushing his hand off her face and climbing onto his broad back, "You promised!"
With a displeased groan, he rolls over, causing her to slide off his back with a delighted squeal. Sitting up while running a hand through his own disheveled hair, he looks at the brat he helped create with a scowl, "Gimme that," he grumbles, snatching the brush from her.
She scrambles into his lap, her small back pressed against his chest, practically vibrating with excitement. Sukuna couldnât relate, it was early⌠too early, like always. He looks down at the top of her head and mutters under his breath, "She was supposed to be a boy..."
Propping yourself up on one elbow, you trace your fingers over his the tattoos that decorate his warm arm, "You say that every morning," you tease him softly.
"Because it's true every morning," he fires back, but the corner of his mouth twitches upward. Awkwardly, he begins working through her tangles, his calloused hands- hands that at times come home bloody, now trying to be gentle with his daughter's delicate scalp.
"Ooww! Papa!!! You're pulling!"
"Stay still then..." he grunts, trying again with more care, "Your hair's a damn mess." As he brushes through her strands, he couldn't help but think how absurd this was- he was Sukuna Ryomen, the fucking guy whoâs got everyone pissing their pants in fear⌠The guy who was born out of bloodshed, who's never had a single care for the lives he's taken. How the hell did he end up with a little girl, a wife, and a home? ⌠His eyes softened as they narrowed, how the hell did he find himself fearing for this tiny things future- the day she's old enough to be married off to a man like himâŚ?
Heâs grown softâŚ
But it doesn't mean he won't rip out the throat of any man who dares lay a finger on her...
You watch, warmth spreading through your chest at the sight of Sukuna struggling, being utterly defeated by a five year old's bedhead, "Want me to take over-"
"No!" both father and daughter respond in unison, making you throw your hands up in surrender before they decide to kick you out of bed.
"I got this," Sukuna insists, his fingers, more accustomed to handling weapons and violence than hair accessories, fumbling with the thin strands. His brow furrowed in concentration as he attempted to separate her hair into sections. How the fuck was he supposed to make three even parts again?
Your daughter looks over at you, wholesome pride in her eyes. This was their thing- this morning struggle that somehow means everything to both of them. Even if Sukuna doesn't admit it, he loves being the protective girl dad... enjoys feeling needed and special in this way.
You lean against his bare shoulder as you watch him separate her hair into three uneven sections, trying to remember how braiding works. The girl in his lap patiently waits with the biggest smile, offering encouraging words as if she's the adult coaching the child.
"Papa! Papa! Like this! Over not under, remember? You did it yesterday!"
"Yesterday I fucked it up too." he mumbles, starting over for a third time.
When he finally manages something resembling a braid, secured with her favorite sparkly leopard scrunchie, she hops off his lap to examine his work in the bathroom mirror. You take the opportunity to press a kiss to Sukunaâs shoulder, then his neck, then the corner of his mouth, "Looks like you're getting better~."
"Don't start what you can't finish," he warns, his voice dropping lower as he turns to catch your lips properly. His hand coming up to squeeze your cheek possessively.
Your daughter returns before you could respond, beaming despite the crooked, messy braid that's already coming undone at the bottom, "Perect! Thank you, Papa!"
Sukuna breaks away from you, looking down at her, at this tiny little being who fears nothing about him... not his size, not his tattoos, not how he puts the fear of god in her preschool teacher. She sees only her papa, the man who makes her burnt pancakes and braids her hair poorly.
The man who protects you- her mother, and would do anything for her. The man who would secretly die for herâŚ
Placing his hand on the top of her head, he gives it a little ruffle, "Yeah kid... perfect."
#Nothing on my mind but Sukuna being a girl dad âĄ#Sukuna#ryomen sukuna#sukuna ryomen#soft sukuna#jjk sukuna#jujutsu sukuna#sukuna x reader#jjk#jujutsu kaisen#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jjk x reader#jjk x you#x reader#jjk fanfic#jjk fluff#sukuna jjk#sukuna jujutsu kaisen#jujutsu kaisen sukuna#sukuna x you#jjk drabbles
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Worst Behavior preview/taglist
pairings- stepbrother! Sukuna x f! Reader
summary - Sukunaâs dad married your mom while you were in high school, and you hated each other on sight. He endlessly picked on and tortured you. So much so that he became a fucking YouTube sensation from prank videos starring you! You come back home for summer break after a bad breakup, and of course annoying ass Sukuna is there, with his stupid smirk, ready to pick on you again, only to be derailed when he sees you're going out with his old friend Toji for a date. Turns out, Sukuna has had it bad for you for a long time, and making you hate him was the only way to guarantee you stay far away, but can he keep up the act?
content/warnings - stepcest, lots of pining, kinda one-sided lol, Sukuna is an asshole to you, reader hates him. Enemies to ????- fuck ton of sexual tension, jealous ass Sukuna, he's probably stealing your panties as we speak, he is kinda yandere, gonna be explicit and filthy ngl, also Toji gonna stir shit up lol - gonna be like 4 parts
Comment to get tagged -Preview below

"Dinner in thirty. Get settled and don't kill each other."
Sukuna eyes you then, ever so slowly up and down with bright ruby eyes, while you start setting things down. "Really filled out huh?"
"I'll punch you." He grins again, you walk up and shove at him, pausing when you feel just how hard his chest is. Blushing a bit, he notices apparently, raising a brow.
"Feeling me up?"
"Gross no. Gym bro." He glares now and you smile meanly right back.
"Yeah how's that loser boyfriend of yours?" He asks so casually, walking in your room and touching all your shit like he does. You follow him and put everything back in its place as he skews every position of any item.
"We broke up," he pauses at your tone, eyeing you then. You're so pretty you make his heart pound in his chest - not like he'd ever fucking tell you. He calls you a gremlin and worse, knowing you're a whole knockout. "Yeah rub it in."
"Wasn't gonna," you pause then, as his eyes glint and catch yours. For a moment you see a rare softness in them, making you falter. "He get tired of your bitchy ass attitude?"
"Oh fuck off, you're such a dick." You roll your eyes, sinking on the white day bed, hands brushing the soft sheets that smell like your mom's favorite fabric softener. But you also smell him, Sukuna, so manly and taking over your space, he leans on your dresser, eyeing a picture of you.
"What happened?"
"Like you care," you lay back, shorts sliding up your thighs. Revealing far, far too much skin, he barely tears his eyes away. "He left me for my best friend."
"Oh shit..." he doesn't know what to say, all he's ever done is pick on you, prank you. Be a whole ass. How does he... comfort you? Without getting too close, feeling shit he can't feel?
What you didn't realize, is Sukuna has had it bad for you for years now. He knows he can never act on it, so the next best thing was to make your life a living hell. To make you hate him and stay far, far away.
It worked, you hate him.
But it's still not enough to stop the raging thoughts always inside him, of the filthy things he thinks of when he's alone. Stroking his cock to memories of you rather than porn, finding himself comparing others to the traits he loves about you. Traits you'll never know.
He can never ever tell you.
"I've got a date this week though. Old friend of ours," you lean up on your elbows, eyeing him then. He feels that familiar pang of fucking jealousy he also can't feel, remembering the ridiculous amount of men he's chased off over the years.
"What old friend?" He asks curiously, you smile a little then.
"Toji. Weren't you two super close?"
"Toji!?"
#sukuna smut#sukuna x reader smut#sukuna x reader#jjk smut#jjk x reader#ryomen sukuna x reader#sukuna ryomen#sukuna x you#sukuna ryomen smut#jjk x reader smut#sukuna x female reader
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đĽ đđđđđ 'đđđđđ' đđđđđ đ đđđđđ đĽ

ŕ¨ŕ§ if there is anything simon riley wants after a mission, it's to come home and get his hands on you
ŕ¨ŕ§ to get to play with him like this oh my god
ŕ¨ŕ§ being his pretty princess and letting him fuck your pretty holes
ŕ¨ŕ§ holding hands while he's eating you out is a must. he needs to know he's making you feel good, taking his time to get you ready for him
ŕ¨ŕ§ he is so handsy. has to have his hands all over you as you bounce on him, helping you move
ŕ¨ŕ§ wanting to take care of him after he's had a rough day at work
ŕ¨ŕ§ simon has a size kink. he doesn't care about weight, just height. he loves feeling bigger than he already is
ŕ¨ŕ§ mans is big. we know it. he knows it. so playing with him is always a nice fun treat
ŕ¨ŕ§ he would be a messy lover. getting his cum absolutely all over you. just wanting to see how pretty you look covered in his loads
ŕ¨ŕ§ you were being mouthy so he has to remind you who the lieutenant is
ŕ¨ŕ§ i 100% believe this is how feral i would be with simon. wanting him to breed me so bad omg
ŕ¨ŕ§ i just know this man GRUNTS when he's taking you from behind WOOF WOOF
ŕ¨ŕ§ he loves measuring to see how deep he'll be before fucking you
ŕ¨ŕ§ having to pull over and fuck you on the side of the road because he can't go a second without having his hands on you
ŕ¨ŕ§ when he eats you out i just know he eats like he's never going to eat again, like a starved man depraved of food
áŻâ
disclaimer : all character p link posts contain links from x, some of which may be unavailable if you donât have an account or have been removed by the original posters. i cannot help this but i will try my best to update links when i can. sometimes trying to open them a few times works x
#ââ đđťđŽđŞđś đłđ¸ďż˝ďż˝ďż˝ďż˝đťđˇđŞđľ đ Ë ŕ¨ŕ§ . â#â đźđ˛đśđ¸đˇ âđ°đąđ¸đźđ˝â đťđ˛đľđŽđ . . ᥣđŠ#ââ đš đľđ˛đˇđ´đź đ Ë ę . â#simon riley x reader#simon riley x y/n#simon riley x you#simon riley x female reader#simon riley headcanons#simon riley headcanon#simon riley hcs#simon riley smut#simon riley imagines#simon riley imagine#simon riley plinks#simon riley fanfiction#simon riley fanfic#simon riley fic#simon ghost riley x reader#simon ghost riley x you#simon ghost riley x female oc#simon ghost riley smut#simon ghost riley headcanons#simon riley ghost#simon riley call of duty#simon riley#simon riley cod#simon ghost riley#simon ghost x reader#ghost cod#ghost call of duty
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Post-marathon sex with Sylus and heâs still insatiable.
Youâre wearing one of his button downs, barely buttoned and lounging on his couch while heâs shirtless in the kitchen making you both something to eat.
Youâre peeking at him, admiring the red nail marks you left on the plains of his back and waist. The low hanging sweatpants doing nothing to help your running thoughts.
Especially since you know he has nothing on underneath.
You settle back, eyes fluttering shut as you try and calm yourself. You both woke up four hours ago and just managed to untangle from each other in the last twenty minutes. Still, your mind replayed everything he did to you over and over and over again. How could you relax?
âKitten.â You still, eyes snapping open to see your lover towering over you. âI thought you wereâŚâ but Sylus only hums, cutting you off as he grabs one of your legs and moves it out of his way. âIâm hungry for something else.â
Had he heard you? Sensed all your filthy thoughts with that cursed eye of his? Whatever had been cooking on the stove now laid forgot in a pan with the burner off.
âHere?â Yet, youâre lifting your other leg, letting your behemoth of a lover push your thighs up to your chest and reveal your bare cunt. âThis is our house, kitten.â And heâs settling between your thighs, the couch somehow accommodating his size as his mouth hovers.
âI sent the twins away for a while, if youâre truly that concerned about getting caught. But we are adults, yâknow. And this is our house. Free to use howeverâŚâ
And youâre relaxing, squished up into the side of the couch as he bares your pussy for his hungry mouth. âLeaving the bed with nothing but my shirt, you really thought Iâd be able to resist such temptations?â He kisses your swollen lips, still sensitive from the rounds of sex.
âThink iâd be able see you laying here and not want to ravish you again?â Another kiss, this time he sucks on your cunt before releasing it. âCould have this pussy a million times and still crave you like Iâve never had it.â
His tongue splits your slit, poking your clit and youâre whimpering. Your feet fall onto his shoulders, his hands still keeping your thighs squished and immobile. Youâre fully at his mercy, no escaping even if you begged.
âTell me to stop.â Drool is pooling on Sylusâ tongue, dripping onto your needy cunt as he pants. âTell me to stop and weâll stop.â Now, itâs your turn to pant.
âSy, I donât wanna stop.â
Like a switch, you can see the temptation consume him. Carmine eyes swallowed by the black of his pupils
âPerfect, because I really canât hold back anymore.â His mouth encompasses you, nose settling on your pubic bone as his mouth tears you apart. His eyes are shut, a sigh of pure contentment vibrating your cunt as you cry his name.

Did I ever mention I yearn for this man like heâs real
#đ soulâs rambles đ#love and deepspace#lads#l&d#l&d headcanons#love and deepspace headcanons#lads smut#sylus#l&d smut#sylus x reader#sylus smut#sylus lads#sylus qin#sylus x mc#l&ds sylus#lnds sylus#sylus love and deepspace#love and deepspace sylus#sylus imagine#lads sylus#sylus x you#sylus fanfic#sylus fic#sylus my beloved
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Out of frame 3/4



Summary : Y/N and Lando Norris have been together for three years. Their relationship is real, steady, and full of quiet love but always behind the scenes. While fans know theyâre a couple, Lando has never posted about her, avoids public displays of affection, and never mentions her in interviews. At first, Y/N understood. She believed it was about privacy, about protecting what they had. But over time, being constantly left out of frame has started to hurt.
Genre : angst, SMAU
Pairing : Lando Norris x reader
Faceclaim : @suanbeiii
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@your_username đCĂ´te dâAzur





A very special photoshoot, thanks @your_photograph đ¸
@_user1 sheâs literally the most beautiful woman Iâve ever seen. like??? how is this even real??
@_user2 Lando must be the dumbest man alive I fear đ
@_user3 girl youâre glowing like someone who deleted his number â¨
@_user4 he said âwhich gf?â and she said ânot me then.â ICONIC.
@_user5 this is exactly what peace looks like after you stop begging a man for the bare minimum
@_user6 no because if they break up for real, Iâm shooting my shot đŤĄ
@_user7 soft girl era activated. and heâs nowhere in sight? suspicious đ§
@_user8 I just know Landoâs watching this through his tears
@_user9 the flower, the pearls, the PINK , yeah no, he lost
@_user10 if he doesnât come crawling back after this⌠I WILL. give me a chance queen đâ¤ď¸
@_user11 she didnât need to mention him to completely obliterate him
@_user12 you mean to tell me he left this to go party with his friends in Japan? okay clown
@_user13 this looks like a breakup shoot and a Vogue cover at the same time
@_user14 soooo when are you free for dinner? asking for literally all of us
Texts messages :
Lando I saw the photos You look⌠breathtaking
Lando I donât even have the words How do you manage to look like that and I act like youâre not the most beautiful person in the world?
Lando Y/N please. You know Iâm sorry Iâve been sorry since the second we started fighting
Lando I messed up, okay? I was defensive, I didnât listen, I didnât take in how much it mattered to you I thought I was protecting something private and sacred, but I see now I was just hiding
Lando I was scared. And I pushed you away because I didnât know how to be vulnerable in front of everyone
Lando I see the comments I know what people are saying I know I look like the dumbest man alive Because I was.
Lando Iâm not partying, Iâm not happy, Iâm not okay. I miss you. I miss your voice, your laugh, your constant humming when you cook, the way you curl your fingers in my sleeve when youâre cold
Lando I sent the flowers because I didnât know what else to do And yeah, anyone can send flowers. But no one can love you the way I do
Lando Iâm sorry. For every time I made you feel small, or hidden, or unloved You werenât. Not even for a second You are everything
Lando Please talk to me. Please. Even if youâre mad. Yell at me. Swear at me. Just⌠donât go silent on me
Lando I donât want to lose you because I didnât know how to show I was proud of you I am, Iâm so proud. Of everything you are
Lando I love you. More than ever
Lando Please come back. Or let me come to you Just say something Anything ?
@_F1Gossip đTokyo, Japan



Spotted: Lando Norris seen out partying in Tokyo after the Japan Grand Prix last night. No Y/N in sight.
@_user1 not him clubbing while sheâs not here, be serious lando
@_user2 heâs out here drinking and dancing while the rest of us are grieving their relation??
@_user3 how are you gonna party when you clearly hurt your girl and sheâs getting love letters in her comments?? GET IT TOGETHER.
@_user5 Iâve defended him for years but⌠I canât do this anymore. she deserved better and we all know it.
@_user6 I know PR team is sweating.
@_user7 he parties like he didnât just lose the most beautiful woman alive and humiliate her on live TV. delusion.
@_user8 idc what the drama is, Iâm just waiting for Y/N to post again. SHEâS the star now
@_user9 literally everyone: âLando please fix itâ Lando: goes clubbing with his shirt unbuttoned
@_user10 âwhich girlfriendâ got him feeling single I guess đ
@your_usurname






Needed a drink and have the best friends ever for thatđĽ
@_user1 Sheâs in her IDGAF era and Iâm here for it đĽđ
@_user2 Oh sheâs DONE done. đŽâđ¨
@_user3 the crown. the girls. the middle finger. this is the official breakup tour
@_user4 Y/N said âcry about it, Iâm busy glowing.â
@_user5 your glow-up is legally blinding. teach us your ways
@_user6 sheâs heartbroken but make it sexy
@_user7 I know Landoâs watching this post on repeat đ
@_user10 Sheâs too fine to be sad. Lando who???
@_user11 Not to be dramatic but Iâd jump in front of a train for her
@_user12 Her friends deserve a raise. Crowned their queen and gave her the world tonight.
@_user13 this is what it looks like when the pretty girl realizes she deserves better đđ
@_user15 tell me your bf fumbled without telling me đ
đ˝
3:02 AM Texts messages : Lando babe babeee bbabyyy i mean not baby i mean. ugh whatever why u so pretty huh?? like??? WHYYYY
Lando saw ur post n now iâm lying on the floor face down sad pathetic loser man vibes
Lando u look like a literal goddess like Aphro⌠aphroditty⌠aphrotiddy?? idk u know what i mean
Lando not even mad just confused hurting too mostly sad after seeing your post
Lando did ur friend give u that crown? tell her i said thanks for crowning the queen of my whole life also tell her to stop commenting âhe fumbledâ i knooooow
Lando i miss ur laugh ur hands ur eyes ur frown when iâm being annoying miss all of it even ur cold feet under the covers
Lando i shud have posted u every day every hooour every millimillisecond u soooo pretty i wanna scream
Lando come back plsss or lemme come back iâll be so good. iâll buy u flowers every hour iâll post u. tag u
Lando can i call uuuu i wanna hear ur voice just wanna know ur real and not like. a hallucination from my own stupidity
Lando ok gonna go cry in the shower now
Lando iloveyou babyyyy answer plssss i'm not drunk just ok i'm drunk plssss answer fuck i miss u
@landonorris



Mmyyy loove
@_user1 wait⌠WHO is this girl??? where is Y/N??? đ
@_user2 why this man do a post at 4 a.m, is he not in a club ??
@_user3 so let me get this straight. he couldnât tag Y/N, never posted her, but now heâs posting mystery girl like this???
@_user4 he really said âwhich gf?â and then proved it đ
@_user5 the audacity of this man is actually insane. like. Y/N was literally still watching his races
@_user6 did they break up and he already moved on?? and posting about it?? bold
@_user7 3 years of silence and now THIS. lando norris you will pay for your crimes
@_user8 hope Y/N is living her best life far away from this nonsense
@_user9 heâs just soft launching a whole new girl while Y/N gets silence. bro what
@_user10 if this is a new gf⌠he better never talk about privacy again cause this is messy đľâđŤ
@_user11 no way you were gifted the most elegant woman and fumbled her like this
@_user12 someone go check on Y/N cause this?? this is COLD.
5:02 AM Texts messages
Y/N who the fuck is she?
Y/N you seriously meet some random girl ?
Y/N you CHEATED on me??? you really cheated on me and then posted it for the world to see?
Y/N lando what the hell you disappear on me, ignore everything I said, and now THIS?
Y/N you couldnât post me for THREE YEARS
Y/N is this why you didnât tag me? because you still flirt with girls in clubs and you didnât want me to find out?
Y/N you didnât even have the decency to end things before doing this we werenât okay, but I still loved you. I will have still showed up for you and this is how you repay me?
Y/N this is LOW. even for you.
Y/N say something SAY. SOMETHING. LANDO !!!!! Answer your phone I'm trying to call you rn
Y/N I swear to god, weâre DONE.
Taglist (closed) : @angelluv16, @httpsxnox, @anunstablefangirl, @chocolatemagazinecupcake, @mayax2o07, @freyathehuntress, @verogonewild, @lilyofthevalley-09, @esw1012, @its-me-frankie, @linneaguriii, @ezzi-ln4, @rlbmutynnek, @actuallyazriel, @sofs16, @thulior, @sltwins, @henna006, @stylesmoonlight12, @lilaissa, @sideboobrry11, @l3thal-l0lita, @lorena-mv33, @ispywlittleeye-blog, @lesliiieeeee, @sageskiesf1, @adynorris, @curlylando, @rebelliousneferut, @justcharlotte, @secret-agents-stole-my-bunnies, @emneedshelp, @lando-505, @yukimaniac, @sashisuslover, @f1norris04, @hi26loveie, @bunnisplayground, @nina481, @reallifemermaidprincess, @cars-and-frogs, @delululeclerc, @txmhxllqnd, @lydia-demarek, @destinyg237, @rhaenyrasversion, @sarascabiosa, @readz4u, @tvdtw4ever, @mynameisangeloflife, @teti-menchon0604, @suns3treading, @op814kitty, @prettyboyroseberg, @willowsnook, @ariesandwolves, @clarksgf, @knivesdoingcartwheels, @pinklemonade34, @fat-meh, @tiaajosephin, @landosbabe4, @easy4, @jule239, @mercrussell, @skylandori, @ryuucollapse, @nickie-amore, @fairyjinn, @seonaw, @strawberrylov-er, @linnygirl09, @dilflover44, @bell1a, @f1fantasys, @sillyfreakfanparty, @janonymus0, @taetae-armyyyyy, @charlesgirl16, @angstynasty, @jules-bea2308, @afternoonarchive, @itsbieberxholland, @rexit-mo, @chlmtfilms, @vampgege, @mochimommy2002, @budgetcupid, @lemon-stvrrr, @bell1a, @taebearyoongs, @hazzasmunchkin, @sainz0fthetimes, @didaaa4, @madelyn2000, @il0vereadingstuff, @march32nd, @chlmtfilms, @literallysza, @cheapdocmartens, @wolfstarsimpxx, @pretzelcat4-blog, @larya810, @6-noir, @urfavftoomie, @ficr3ccs, @strawberrylov-er, @wosof1, @behindmygreyeyes, @justheretoreadthxxs, @pinklemonade34, @ninass-world, @landosbabe4, @leclercdream, @perfectsuitcasegardenpie, @flowersandalll, @sagestack, @angxedxtz, @fangirl125reader, @mimisweetz, @mattslovelygf, @taetae-armyyyyy, @guacala, @gothicwidowsworld, @chezmardybum, @virtualperfectioncat, @cherryhazee,@bubble012, @teti-menchon0604
#lando norris fic#lando norris#lando x reader#lando x you#lando norris x reader#ln4#lando fanfic#lando norris x y/n#lando x oc#lando norris x oc#lando norris x you#formula 1 x reader#f1#f1 x reader#f1 fanfic#ln4 x y/n#ln4 imagine#ln4 x reader#ln4 fic#mclaren f1#f1 smau#lando smau#lando norris smau#formula 1 smau#ln4 smau
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how f1 drivers react
when they want you back after you break up with them (part two to this fic)
drivers mentioned: MV33, LN4, OP81, AA23, CS55, CL16, LH44, GR63



max verstappen
Weeks pass in painful silence. For days after the sudden breakup, Max tried to call, to text, to contact you. But the longer you ignored him, thinking it was for the best, the more it hurt. Eventually, the phone calls stopped, and the texts too. Your world descended into self-inflicted silence and loneliness.
You knew it would be hard without him, but the loneliness was worse than you could have ever imagined. It settled deep in your bones, carved into your soul and invaded every aspect of your life. Every moment of silence was a reminder of what you had given up.Â
Every second of silence was a reminder of how alone you were.
Friends tried to comfort you, tried to tell you that you had made the right choice. But in the middle of the night, with nothing but the cold emptiness of your apartment to hold you, you could only spiral into darker thoughts: you had done the wrong thing. But it was too late. What was done was done. Max had stopped calling, moved on likely. You needed to as well.
You couldn't bring yourself to watch his races. You told yourself that it was for the better. You needed to let go completely. It was the only way you could move on and build a life without Max.
But when you see him again, finally, itâs not at a race. It's not some flashy paddock media day or high-stakes press event, things you used to loathe and love so much. Itâs on your doorstep, hoodie pulled up, eyes red-rimmed with exhaustion.Â
âI keep waiting for you. Every night. I keep thinking you'll call, you'll turn up at my house. You never do,â he says quietly, holding your gaze for the first time in forever. âLook me in the eye and say it again. Tell me our love isn't worth it. Tell me you don't love me anymore. C'mon. Tell me to leave and I will.â
You open your mouth to reply, not even sure what you could possibly say in response beyond what you'd already said that infamous night, but Max just holds up one hand to quiet you. Reaching into his pocket, he pulls out his phone and taps it a few times before a sound starts to play out of it quietly.Â
It's you.
Your voice echoes back to you, happy, laughing, talking about something stupid. You hadn't realized heâd saved it. You're not sure why he would until the sound of you hanging up echoes around you both.
I'll talk to you later, ok? Bye Maxie. I love you!
âThatâs the last time you said you loved me,â he says, voice low, pure exhaustion dripping from his words. âAnd Iâvelistened to it every single night.â
Tears sting your eyes and threaten to fall. Max finally steps closer but still doesn't reach out for you.
âI havenât driven better. I'm getting worse, I'm making stupid mistakes. I havenât focused more. Iâve just... missed you. Every day. Every night. You think you were holding me back? I'm scared every time I drive, scared of winning and still going home alone. Scared of doing well and you thinking that it proves you right when I know I'm fucking miserable. I'msorry I told you to leave. I shouldn't have... fuck, I'm just scared, and tired, and I want you. Please.â
Behind him, thundering clouds threaten to erupt and pour down over the city. Dark storms brew with forbearing gloom.
âYou want to protect me? You want to make me a better driver? Then stay. Let me love you again. Because losing you has nearly fucking destroyed me."
His hands finally reach out for yours, holding them tightly. His hands are cold, but you find that you don't mind. You need to feel him so desperately that you're willing to endure the torture of the weather on your fingertips. Within you, a deep desire to keep Max warm and safe resurfaces with renewed conviction.
âYou are the only thing Iâve ever wanted outside of racing. Please. I love you. I've only ever loved you.â
Despite the tears welling in your eyes, a small smile spreads across your face.
"It's cold. Come inside." You whisper the words, tugging slightly on his hands.
"Only... only if you mean this. I can't come inside if you're just going to turn me away again."
Swallowing guilt, swallowing your hurt and fears, swallowing everything you thought was right that turned out to be so wrong, you say, "Come inside, Max. Please."
Love you think, is the sound of Max closing the door behind him and knowing he is here to stay.Â
lando norris
You know you shouldn't watch it, but when the clip comes up on your instagram you can't help but pause and watch. It's instinct: you see Lando, you watch. Despite everything, all you said, all that happened and tore you two apart, you still care deeply for him.Â
Itâs a post-race interview. Landoâs just gotten a podium, according to the video's caption anyway. He looks as he always does after a tough drive: hair stuck to his forehead from sweat, eyes wide, adrenaline high as he slowly calms down and takes deep breaths inwards. His smile is wide, until the journalist makes a passing comment...
"Must be nice having all the distractions out of the way now."
Something shifts in his expression. Itâs barely a flicker, but if you know himâreally know himâyou can see it. You know what the interviewer means, the media, the sprint, the free practices, quali, it's all out of the way now. He only has to think about starting P1 tomorrow. All the distractions are gone. Almost all the opsticals of the week have been passed. But the joke doesnât land. His smile falters, then falls completely. His eyes are hollow with want, tinged with a hint of fear.
And then he says it.
âNot all distractions are bad.â
The interviewer laughs, confused, asks him to elaborate, and he seems all too happy to comply. But he keeps going. The world around you seems stuck, you can't take your eyes away from the screen. If you listened carefully, you swear you can hear your life caving in around you.
âSometimes the things everyone else thinks are a distraction are actually what keeps you grounded. What keeps youâŚÂ you.â
He looks down, clears his throat, doesnât continue. What's said is said. When he finally looks up again, staring into the camera lens, it feels like he is looking right at you. His eyes meet yours for the first time in weeks, even if it's just through the screen. The familiarity of his gaze burns. Your heart cracks. You miss him. God, you miss you.Â
The video cuts off and you are stuck again in the quiet abyss of your empty apartment. Everything is quiet again. But later that night, you get a text.
I didnât mean to say that. but I meant it.
Before you can question yourself, second guess your instincts, you reply.
congrats on P1 I didn't see quali but I saw the interview
Then, after a moment of consideration, you add:
I miss you too, btw
It's a few minutes of dead silence, eerie uncomfortable nothingness, before he responds again.
can i call you? please
You think of his words earlier, of the way he looked as you walked out of his life and shattered all you had built together. You call him without thinking of the alternative.Â
"Hey," his voice rings out through your speaker.
"Hi."
Thereâs a pause. The kind that aches. You can hear his breath, unsteady, shallow, like heâs been holding it since the second your name lit up his screen.
âI didnât think youâd reply,â he admits quietly.
âYou didnât leave much room not to,â you say, your voice almost a whisper. âYou're not the only one who feels alone right now, Lando.â
âI know I canât take back how I made you feel," he murmurs, "I just⌠I need you to know none of this, none of the podiums, none of the wins, means anything when Iâm not coming home to you.â
Your throat tightens. You try to swallow it down, but his words eat at the fear in your heart...
âI thought I was doing the right thing,â you say softly. âGiving you space. Taking myself out of the equation. I didnât want to be the reason youââ
âYou were never the problem,â he cuts in, firm but gentle. âYou were the only thing that made the rest of it bearable.â
Another pause. This one is softer. He exhales.
âI want to fix this. I donât care how long it takes.â
And maybe you should hesitate. Maybe you should ask for more time, time to think it over. But youâve already spent weeks apart, feeling the ache of a life half-lived. And now, hearing his voice, hearing the tremble heâs trying to hide, something in you unclenches.
âOkay,â you whisper.
âYeah?â He sounds like he doesnât quite believe it.
You smile, a little cracked, a little shaky, but real for the first time in days. âYeah. Win your race, Lan, then come home to me.â
oscar piastri
The past few weeks had dragged by you in a dull, confusing haze. The sun felt dimmer, the rain less harsh, the breeze not so calming. Everything was just... off. You knew adjusting to being alone again would be difficult, but you never imagined it would feel like this. So helpless, so cold.
Without Oscar, someone you relied upon and loved so completely, your life felt empty. You spent your days going through the motions. You woke up, ate, slept, worked. It all felt so monotone. It was impossible to do something without wondering where you would be if you were still with Oscar.Â
A seed of doubt planted itself in your mind. Maybe, just maybe, you think, you were wrong. Maybe things would have been better if you were still together. But you cut the sapling before it could grow into a full thought.Â
Dwelling on the past was killing you. Dwelling on the past was leaving you tired. Not the kind of tired that sleep could fix, but the kind that left you feeling nothing at all. Heaviness hung in your bones.
Sleep seemed to abandon you these days, leaving you alone in the moonlight hours. The howl of the wind was your only companion in the night.
Itâs past midnight when your phone buzzes. With nothing better to do, and no inclining that sleep would find you anytime soon, you reach for it from where it is charging on your bedside table.
Oscar's name stares back at you through the bright light of your phone, blinding you momentarily in the darkness of your bedroom.Â
You hesitate before opening it, his name on the screen still does something awful to your chest. Memories of past late night calls, tired giggles and intimate words, swirl around you in a haze of regret. But, to your unexpected surprise, itâs not a text. Itâs a voice note.Â
You press play. The second you hear his voice, the pounding in your heart seems to double in speed. And yet, the comforting familiar sound also puts you completely at ease.
Hey. Sorry, I know itâs late where you are. I shouldn'tâ I knowâ I just got back from dinner with the team. Everyone was laughing about something, and I almost turned to tell you about it. As if you would be there, next to me.
He exhales sharply, so suddenly that it shocks you out of the trance you're in. Hearing his voice again, speaking directly to you, feels like a delusion after all this time. Thereâs silence for a few seconds, just the quiet rustle of fabric, the unmistakable sound of him rubbing his hands against his clothes that way he always does when heâs nervous.
You can imagine it as if heâs standing right in front of you. But you know that if he was here, standing close and looking you in the eyes, you wouldnât know what to say, how to act, to look him in the eyes and not admit all the regrets youâd been having.
Missing him feels like longing for a lost childhood toy, something you remember so fondly and yet is so resolutely out of reach. But loving him is something you can never let go of.
Itâs stupid, I know. It's been weeks. We haven't even talked once since. I know. I should know better. But I just⌠I donât think Iâve gone one day without reaching for my phone to text you, call you. And I havenât sent anything, 'cause I didn't want to hurt you more than I already have. But tonight it kind of hit me that maybe I should. Text you, I mean. Reach out. So, I guess that's what I'm trying to do. I don't even know if you'll listen to this. I wouldn't blame you if you didn't. I should have fought harder. Should have told you more often how much you mean to me, how much you still mean to me. You were never a distraction. You were my balance. My constant. My love.
You wouldn't hear me then, but I have to make you hear me now. I love you. I love you. I'll say it as many times as you need to believe it again. And I miss you. Every day. I just want to try again. Please, let me show you how much I need you, how much I love you.
You lie there, staring at the ceiling. When the recording stops, you drag the audio back to the beginning and listen through it again. Over and over, you replay the section where he tells you he loves you.Â
He sounds just as truthful, just as honest, as the first night he said it to you. The night he held you so close, kissed you so slow and carefully that you wanted to melt into the floor and never touch anyone but him ever again. The night you felt whole, and loved, and so at peace with your life. The night you had remembered over and over through the past few weeks with a longing dread. Suddenly, yet slowly, in small thoughts, then all at once, it feels like you have no option but one.
You donât text him back. No.
You press call. He picks up immediately.
carlos sainz
You probably should have expected this, should have seen it coming from a mile away. Carlos is not one to let something, or rather someone, he loves slip through his fingers like spring water. He's built his life around the people he cares about, painstakingly carved out a space for each of them in his chaotic, fast-paced life⌠he wouldn't let you think so lowly of yourself for long.Â
Itâs only been a few weeks, but itâs felt like a lifetime.Â
You open the door of your apartment, dressed in pyjamas and an oversized hoodie that was likely his, once upon a time, to find him standing there. Hair slightly messy. Hoodie zipped halfway.Â
His eyes drift over you, slowly, taking every inch of your appearance. It doesnât feel crude though, or intrusive, his gaze is so familiar, so kind, it fills your heart with joy just to be seen by him again. A small pit of guilt sinks in your stomach, you are the reason you havenât seen him. This was your choice, after all, one you made for him.
He holds a takeout bag in one hand, your favourite food from the place you always used to order from together when it rained. It was the food that comforted you in your worst moments and excited you when you were feeling your best.Â
You havenât seen him in weeks. Yet here he was.Â
He offers the bag, holding it out in one hand while the other settles on his hip. But he doesnât move closer. He looks stuck in place, unsure of what moves to make and yet so confident in his presence at your front door.
âIâm not here to fix anything. Not if you donât want me to,â he says softly, a tone of admittance colouring his words. âI just thought⌠you probably havenât eaten. You always forget when you are stressed, or tired.â
You take it. Hands brush. He pulls away first. You find yourself immediately missing his touch.
Carlos looks down, then back up, eyes dark and earnest.
âIâve had a lot of time to think. And Iâve been telling myself to let you go if thatâs what you need, what you really want. But I also know you pushed me away thinking it was helping me. That it was the unselfish thing.â
He pauses, breathes deeply as if centring himself. He speaks with a tone that tells you he has been thinking of the right words to say for days, and is still afraid of driving you away.
âBut cariĂąo⌠you were the thing keeping me sane. I didnât need saving from you. I needed saving with you. I need you to save me. Every day I need you to save me.â
You bite your lip and look down at the bag. The familiar smell fills your nostrils.
âMy house is so empty,â you admit, and it feels like exposing the deepest part of your soul. âIâve still been watching you drive. Youâre doing well. Iâm happy for you.â
âIâm driving well, maybe. But Iâm not happy, cariĂąo. You have known me long enough to know that is the truth.â
You canât find it in your to meet his eyes, he keeps speaking anyway.
âIâm not driving well because you are gone. Iâm driving well despite it. Because my life is nothing but racing now and I am miserable. Every day I think of you. There is no one else for me, and you must let me show you again. Without you... without you I am no one. You make me whole.â
His words are sweet, and so painfully honest that they burn into your heart.
âIâve missed you. More than I should. Even though I feel like I shouldnât. I want you to become everything youâve ever dreamed of. But watching you do that without meâŚâ you trail off, unable to explain the hurt you have inflicted on yourself by forcing him to go. Doing this, this conversation, out in the open feels too exposed. You want to tell him you love him in the comfort of your home. The home you want to share again.
âDo you want to come in?â You ask it in a hushed whisper, like saying it loud will frighten him away againÂ
He smiles faintly. âOnly if you want me to stay this time.â
âWill you? Please? I think... I think we need to talk.â
His smile is soft, understanding, filled with hope, âOf course, my love.â
That night, he holds you close. He doesn't leave, you don't ask him to.
alex albon
You donât pick up the first time he calls.
Or the second.
But the third? You answer.
ââŚHey,â he says, voice gentle and soft, but cautious. He's holding something back. Like he is afraid of scaring you off.
You donât say anything at first. Just breathe. Just listen. You half expect him to hang up, regret his decision to contact you and disappear again. After all, you were the one who walked away, who could blame him for holding onto resentment and anger and just... hanging up?
The,n quietly, you say, âAlex.â His name feels like the only thing you could possibly say.
He lets the silence stretch out. It doesnât feel awkward, just heavy. Shared. Weighted with everything thatâs been left unsaid for too long. Everything you didn't explain that day, everything you struggled to say. The silence reminds you not of the emptiness of your apartment, but of the comforting quiet of lying in each other's arms. Everything, even silence, feels better with him around. Even if it's just his voice.
âI donât want anything from you,â he says, finally. âNot really. Iâm not calling to change your mind. I justââ He sighs, shaky and unsure. âI just wanted you to know I think about you. Still. Every day.â
You close your eyes and press your forehead to your knee, trying too hard to not let your thoughts spiral away from you. Youâre sitting on the floor of your apartment, hoodie sleeves tugged over your hands, and your heart somewhere between breaking and blooming at the sound of his voice.
âIâve been driving ok, not great, not badly,â he continues. âDoing the media stuff. Smiling for the cameras. Saying the right things when they ask. Everyone keeps saying I look happy.â
Happy, just like you wanted him to be. That's the reason you did all of this. For him. To help him, even if it hurt your soul to do it.Â
Thereâs a pause. Then a quiet, dry chuckle.
âBut Iâm faking it. All of it.â
Your breath catches, stuck in your throat. No.
âI catch myself thinking about you in the stupidest moments,â he says, softer now. âLike... Iâll be walking out of the paddock and Iâll reach for my phone to text you something dumb. Just muscle memory. Or Iâll hear a song you used to sing in the shower and itâll hit me like Iâve run out of road.â
You stay quiet, swallowing hard and fiddling with your jumper sleeves. Against your better instincts to run, to hang up and hide yourself from the truth that maybe breaking up wasn't saving him, you stay.
âYou remember how you used to tease me for holding my breath when Iâm nervous?â he says, voice roughening just a little, like he's holding in a hollow laugh that is bubbling in his chest. âLike, properly holding itâlike Iâm underwater?â
You smile, just a little. Of course, you remember.Â
"Yeah..."
âI keep catching myself doing it again. A lot. I didnât even realise until Carlos pointed it out during a sim session... said I looked like I was about to pass out.â
Another small pause.
âAnyway,â he says, trying to collect himself. âIf this is really what you want, I'm not here to yell at you. But I need you to know. I just... I hope youâre okay. I really do.  But if youâre not, if thereâs ever a day you want to talk, about anything, bout everything.... I'm here. I'm always hereâ
You don't hang up.
"I'm sorry," you whisper into the phone. "I ruined this. All of this."
"No, baby, no. Please don't apologise. You were doing what you thought was right."Â His voice cracks a little, rushed and urgent, like heâs terrified youâll disappear again.
âI miss you,â you say. Simple. Honest. Like breathing.
âI miss you so much it makes my chest hurt,â he says. "I know I canât go back in time, but I want to move forward. With you. If thereâs any part of you that wants that tooâŚâ
You wipe your eyes again and sit up straighter.
âI want that,â you whisper. âIâm scared. But I want that.â And that's all it takes.Â
charles leclerc
After weeks of moping around your apartment, mourning your own decisions and cursing yourself, your friends had put their feet down and ordered you to have a night out. Something to take your mind off of him. Despite the fact that you had no desire to go out, you agreed. More for their peace of mind than your own.
You're dressed in your favourite dress, make-up done, hair perfectly in place. At any other point in your life, you would feel beautiful, but for some reason, you don't feel much of anything at all. From the second you enter the party, some rooftop bar event your friends had heard of through word of mouth, you want to go home. But you don't want to let them down, so you try and stick it out, try to pretend you feel ok.
Time passes by you, and it's hours before you notice it. Notice him. Because of course he is here. Why wouldn't he be?
Charles walks through the dancing crowd and it's like the sea parts for him, people move effortlessly out of his way despite the lack of room on the dance floor. His eyes scan the room and then, as if on instinct, they land on you.
He walks over without any dramatics, but there is a speed in his step. He's afraid if he's too slow you'll disappear into the crowd again. He's barely a metre away when he starts speaking. You can only just hear his voice over the booming music, but the heartbreak in his voice is unmistakable.
âEvery time I win, I wish you were there. Every time I lose, I need you.â
You inhale sharply. He's suddenly right in front of you. He looks down at you with tired, hurting eyes.
âYou said you didnât want to hold me back. But love doesnât hold me backâit grounds me. Keeps me from getting lost in all of this. Cheri, how could you ever believe your love was hurting me? Without it, I am nothing.â
Youâre frozen in place, drink in hand, heart in your throat. You thought this night couldnât possibly get worse... you never imagined it might get better. You never thought you'd get the chance to explain yourself to him again.
âCharlesâŚâ you say, barely audible, unsure if he even hears it over the bassline of the song thumping through the bar the screams of joy that pervade around the room, the sound of dancing feet shaking the building.
But he does. Of course he does.
âI know I should have said something earlier,â he continues, closer now, lips practically against your cheek so you can hear him clearly. His hands hold yours, keeping you close with a grounding grasp. His eyes flick briefly to your friends standing behind you, watching from the edge of the crowd, unsure whether to swoop in and save you or stay back and let this moment unfold. You hope they stay away, you couldn't stand to lose this moment because of well-meaning friends. His gaze returns to yours, and itâs the same one youâve seen a hundred times before.Â
âBut I wanted to give you space. I thought⌠if I gave you time, youâd come back when you were ready.â
You laugh softly, but thereâs no humour in it. âI wasnât going to come back.â
âIÂ know,â he says, voice strained and tired. âThatâs why Iâm here. One of my friends saw you in the crowd, I had to come. I'm sorry. I had to try one last time.â
The music shifts suddenly to something slower, softer. You glance over your shoulder as the crowd shifts to accommodate the new rhythm, but Charles doesnât seem to notice. Or maybe he doesnât care. He only sees you. The rest of the room fades into the background for him.
âI didnât think I deserved you,â you admit. âI didnât think I could watch you go out there every weekend, chasing something so dangerous and demanding, and not become the thing that dragged you down.â
âYou were never the weight,â he says, without hesitation. âYou were the anchor. Thereâs a difference.â
You donât speak for a moment, letting his words settle over the noise, the lights, the blur of people around you. Youâve imagined this moment a hundred ways over the past few weeks, some louder, some messier, but none quite like this. There is something so soft about this, despite the noise.Â
âYou look beautiful,â he adds quietly. âBut you donât look like yourself.â
Thatâs what undoes you. That sentence. The gentle truth in it.
âI havenât felt like myself.â
âThen let me take you home.â
âCharlesââ
âNot like that,â he says gently, quick to clarify. âNot unless you want that. I just⌠I want to talk. Or sit in silence. Or be there while you fall asleep on the couch watching something terrible. I donât care what it is, just... let me come with you this time.â
You look at him, really look. And for the first time in weeks, the ache in your chest loosens, just a little.
âOkay,â you whisper. âLetâs go home.â
lewis hamilton
Youâre alone on a walk, one headphone in and hands stuffed into the pocket of your hoodie, desperately trying to shield yourself from the cold wind of the mid-afternoon, when a familiar voice calls your name. The sound of the voice, so comfortingly recognisable, causes you to stumble over your own feet. He's here.Â
It's Lewis. Hoodie on, hood up, looking just as surprised as you feel seeing him out in the world. He stops a few steps away from you. The distance feels like a gorge you could fall into if you take a wrong step. The fall would go on for ages, you can't risk slipping now.Â
âIâve been writing, texting you, then deleting it all before I send it,â he says quietly. âTrying to find the right words to say. Honestly, I don't think they exist. Every time I think I've figured out what to say, it just feels wrong.â
You just stare, hands fidgeting in your pocket as you feel stuck to the concrete sidewalk.
"I'm sorry. I know you probably want me to walk away, but if I don't say this now, in person, I never will."
Before you can stop yourself, you say softly, "I never want you to walk away, Lew." The truth of your own words surprises you. Lewis can only smile slightly at the sudden interjection. But he knows, just as well as you do, that you didn't leave him because you fell out of love. It was fear that drove you away.
âI thought I could prove something by letting you go. That I could be strong. But the truth is, Iâve felt lost without you.â
"Lewâ"
âI miss you,â he adds, and itâs almost a whisper. âGod, I miss you so much. I've stayed up at night just thinking about what you said. I can't believe I let you believe all those things about yourself. I can't believe I didn't fight harder to prove how much I love you.â
You stare at him. This is the version of him that you always knew. The one who cares so deeply, it scares him. The one who never walks away unless he thinks he has to.
âYou couldâve sent any of those texts,â you manage to say, voice uneven and slow. âI probably wouldâve answered, no matter what you said.â
âI didnât want to reach for you until I knew I could be what you needed. You need someone who can show you that you aren't a burden. You need someone who can prove how loved you are. You deserve perfection.â
You let the silence linger a beat longer. Then you take a slow, steady step forward.
âI didnât need perfect,â you say. âI just needed you.â
Lewis reaches out, gently, finally closing the gap between the two of you. âLetâs start again. Somewhere quiet. Just us.â
You nod before your voice catches up.
george russell
Itâs been raining all day, light, misty showers that make the city feel cold. The world is sad, you want to say to your friends, but you don't think they'd understand what you mean. Maybe you just mean you are sad. But even that feels wrong.
Youâve left the windows open just a crack, a small sliver of room to let in the crisp storm air as you curl up on the couch. There's a cup of tea in your hand that's slowly going cold, but you don't drink it. It's more for the company than for taste. The TV plays something you arenât watching. It's just background noise to keep your thoughts from drifting back to him.Â
Itâs been weeks. Long enough that youâve memorized the silence his missing presence has left behind. You miss him, but it was all for good reason.
You donât hear the footsteps outside your apartment, you donât hear his car as it arrives at your building. But when the doorbell rings, something deep inside you seizes up.
You freeze.
You havenât seen George in weeks. But when you open the door, heâs there, suitcase by his side, hair messy, expression shaken. You realise suddenly that he must have come straight from the airport. His race ended only 15 hours ago. He's come straight to you.
âIâm not here to argue,â he says softly. âI just want to talk. Please.â
Against your better instincts, you hold the door open and step aside, welcoming him in in silence. He walks in slowly. His eyes scan your apartment like he doesn't recognise it, like he hasn't been there a hundred times before. Seeing him feel so out of place feels like a punch to the gut. It's a reminder of what you said to him, the way you pushed him away so suddenly, so cruelly.
Eventually, after a moment of quiet contemplation and awkward insection, he sits on your couch, wringing his hands in his lap. When he speaks, finally, his voice holds with it a tone of practised care. He's been thinking about what to say for days, you're sure of it.Â
âYou said I needed to focus. That I needed to be selfish.â
He looks up.
âWell, this is me being selfish. I need you to hear me, let me speak before you turn me away again. Please."Â
You swallow the lump in your throat and settle yourself down across from him on the couch. You keep a bit of distance from him, not trusting yourself to be able to not fall apart if you sit within arm's reach. You missed him more than words could explain, but you owed him the chance to speak. You know you do.
After a deep breath, long and slow, he starts to speak again.
"I need you. Not just the good parts. I want the hard days. The fears. The panic at 2 am. I want all of it. Iâve spent every day since you left wondering if I couldâve... should've... done more. So here I am. Doing more.â
You press your hands into the couch cushion beneath you to stop them from shaking, trying desperately to listen to every intonation and shake of his voice, as if you could uncover every thought he's had for the past few weeks if you just listen close enough.Â
You arenât sure what to say. You thought you were protecting him by leaving, giving him an out to finally focus. But now, here he is, telling you the absence of you is the only thing thatâs really hurt him. The truth hurts more than your fears ever did.
âI kept thinking⌠maybe if I just left you alone, gave you time and space, youâd feel free again. Feel more like yourself again. â His voice dips. âBut I think about you constantly. Every second since you walked away. And I donât feel free... I feel hollow. And you're right, I should be more selfish with my career, my life. So this is me being selfish about what I want: I want you. I want you next to me all the time. Every day. Every night.â
He swallows, hard. Like saying all he's feeling out loud is hurting him. But he keeps going despite it.
âIf you donât want this anymore, truly don't, not because of what you think is best for my career, for me, but because you don't want it, Iâll go. But I had to try. I had to tell you that you werenât a distraction. You were my calm in the chaos. You still are.â
You stare at him, heart caught in your throat and eyes glued to his sombre gaze. Your voice breaks when you speak.
âI've missed you so much, George.â
His shoulders sag with relief. âI know I'm not perfect. I know I wasnât always good at balancing it all. But I never stopped loving you. That has never changed. Not for a second.â
He shifts, adjusting his posture sat upright on your couch. After a moment's hesitation, he asks, âCan I hold you?â
When you nod he moves slowly, carefully, like heâs afraid heâll wake you from some fragile dream. But when his arms wrap around you, itâs like the weight of everything you've ever feared has finally lifted off your shoulder.
You melt into him.
And for the first time in weeks, you breathe easy.
taglist: @fastandcurious16 @coolpeanutchaos @hangingwiththestars
-> ree here! I'm sorry for the length inconsitancy and any mistakes! I tried to just do what felt right for each set up and I have editted this very sleep deprived from uni study... send help for my incoming essay due dates i am avoiding by writing imagines instead...
#f1#f1 fanfic#f1 x reader#george russell#max verstappen#alex albon#carlos sainz#charles leclerc#Lewis Hamilton#f1 imagine#Lando Norris#oscar piastri#angst#break up#f1 x you#formula 1 x reader#drivers react#my fic#max verstappen x reader#lando norris x reader#oscar piastri x reader#alex albon x reader#carlos sainz x reader#charles leclerc x reader#lewis hamilton x reader#George Russell x reader#ree writes#part 2#getting back together
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five ways he loves you â OP81
cw: pure fluff, established relationship, lots of cuddly boyfriend energy

âŚ
Oscar Piastri is not a loud lover. He doesnât yell it to the world or post a million photos of you online (unless youâre both drunk and giggling in the back of a golf cart). But the boy loves hard. Quietly. Consistently. In ways that make you melt from the inside out.
1. Words of Affirmation. He says âIâm proud of youâ so often itâs like punctuation to him. You burn toast? âStill proud of you.â You get a raise? âI knew theyâd notice how amazing you are.â You get sad for no reason and cry on the couch in his hoodie? âIâm proud of you for feeling things and letting it out. Thatâs hard.â And sometimes, when you least expect it, he slips in a low, sleepy âI love you more than anything,â like heâs letting you in on a secret heâs kept since the first time he saw you.
2. Quality Time. Oscarâs version of quality time is not extravagant. Itâs the way he sits beside you in comfortable silence, sharing a blanket, each of you doing your own thing but still touching. Itâs post-race nights in hotel rooms, where you lie on his chest and watch trashy TV while he absentmindedly plays with your fingers. Itâs road trips where he lets you DJ, even when you add questionable 2000s pop hits, and he just laughs, shaking his head like heâs doomed and in love.
3. Acts of Service. You donât even notice half the things he does. Until one day you realize your car has a full tank, your favorite snacks are stocked, your charger was untangled and neatly placed on the nightstand. Heâll stay up to double-check your flight details, or fix that annoying kitchen cabinet that creaks without a word. His version of âI love youâ is âalready took care of it.â And itâs never about being thanked â he just wants to make life easier for you.
4. Gifts. Oscar isnât flashy, but heâs thoughtful. A tiny koala keychain when he comes back from Melbourne. A limited-edition notebook because you mentioned needing a new one (once). A necklace with your birthstone, given so casually over breakfast that it takes you a full minute to register what just happened. He never says why he bought it. But the way he looks at you when you open it â that little proud smile and soft eyes â says everything.
5. Physical Touch. This is his weakness. Oscar is so touch-starved when it comes to you, itâs embarrassing (to him, not to you). Heâll pretend to stretch, then wrap an arm around you. Heâll pull you close during interviews when youâre just off-camera. Heâll come home, drop his bag, and immediately bury his face in your neck. He rubs circles on your thigh when youâre anxious, kisses your forehead when youâre sleepy, laces his fingers with yours under tables. Heâd spend hours like that if you let him. And you do.
âŚ
Oscar doesnât love in loud, chaotic ways. He loves like a steady hum â the kind you donât notice until itâs gone. But with him? Itâs never going anywhere.
Heâs all five love languages. And somehow, all five belong to you.

Šp1girlfriend
#oscar piastri#oscar piastri x reader#oscar piastri x y/n#oscar piastri x you#oscar piastri fanfic#oscar piastri one shot#oscar piastri imagine#oscar piastri fanfics#oscar piastri imagines#f1#f1 x reader#fanfic#formula 1#f1 fanfic#f1 fanfics#f1 imagines#x reader#op81#op81 x reader#op81 mcl#op81 imagine#op81 fic#oscar piastri headcanons#headcanon#headcanons
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"youre so hot, wanna sit on my face?" LANDO X Y/N PLEAAAASE. enemies to lovers or bsfs to lovers pls.
making it up- l.norris

ęŠ summary: he's one annoying guy
ęŠ pairing: lando norris x fem! fewtrell! reader
Lando Norris had no filter, and a brain the size of a pigeonâs. He liked to party, drink, and piss you off.Â
Y/n Y/l/n. Max Fewtrellâs step sister. Youâd never gone long without seeing him, since he was the most overprotective fucker in the entire world. He had rules for you. You were 23 and he had rules. Yes, it annoyed you, but he was your brother and you loved him anyway (even if his rules were bullshit).Â
Max Fewtrellâs Rules for a happy Y/n, and an unanxious Max:
Do not under any circumstances go out with Lando Norris. (no issue there)
No stepping foot in Ibiza, Dubia, etc. Â (annoying, but you werenât exactly a partier)Â
No dating drivers. (that was fine too, most of them were self-absorbed and ugly)Â
Listen to Maxâs advice and actually follow it. (now that one, was bullshit)
Max had the worst advice in the world, he didnât know relationships because his was perfect, he didnât know friendships because he and Lando were somehow bonded by something cosmic (aka they never fought), and he didnât know the corporate world, because he had his own business. He was a sheltered little flower, and his advice was shit.Â
Still, you pretended to follow the rules on the weekends you visited him, whether it be at the tracks, or joining some quadrant shoot in the middle of fucking nowhere, or just in his apartment with P.Â
This weekend, it was on track. Montreal. Lando was somehow still high off his win in Monaco, and he was even cockier than ever. You werenât exactly interested in it though. You were too busy trying to hide the fact that you had a date, with someone Max probably wouldnât like very much.Â
Lando noticed. He noticed the way you just shrugged his sexually charged and annoying remarks off. He saw you on your phone more times than youâd ever been before. He watched you smile at the screen.Â
It made him twitch.Â
Was it wrong to go after your best friendâs little sister? Probably, yes. Did he give a fuck when heâd been in love with you for over a decade? Not one bit.Â
He dropped his helmet on the table in front of you, his suit still sweaty and hanging low on his hips. You didn't look up from your goddamn phone, but your energy was different. Less engrossed, and more⌠aloof. It pulled at his heartstrings when he noticed you frowning, and he wanted nothing more than to reach out and hold you, and ask you what was wrong. Jesus Christ, when did he turn into a romantic? A month ago all he was doing was making jokes about the fact he could see your bra through your white t-shirt (which heâd strategically spilt water on), and now he wanted to make everything better for you. He was slightly proud of that. Only 10 sexual jokes this weekend, and none of them were in front of Max, thatâs a record low.Â
âYouâre staring,â your voice was monotone and your eyes stared at your phone. He didnât avert his gaze.Â
âYouâre stunning,â he shrugged. âEven when youâre frowning.â
You looked up from your phone, entirely unimpressed. He looked back at you with that signature smirk, trying to contain his giggles.Â
âWhat do you want Norris?â you scoffed, crossing your arms. Operation get you off your phone: successful.Â
âYou,â he shrugged like it was obvious, and you rolled your eyes again. âI want to talk to you, beautiful.âÂ
He watched as you faltered for just a second, and his smirk grew bigger. You sighed. âWhat do you want to talk about? Your crash in quali just now?â Your words had no venom behind them, so it didnât bother him. He knew what he was capable of, he was a fucking Monaco Gp winner. So he was starting 10th, big deal.Â
He leaned in closer, his voice going lower. âI was thinking more⌠whoever youâve been texting all weekend, and why you seem so secretive about it?â He masked his jealousy well. He didnât pry and he wouldnât if this didnât work. Even though he wanted you more than anything, he knew he had to let you fall in love with him. Heâd been in love with you since karting days, when you were too smart for your own good and helped him with his homework and appalling handwriting. Still he knew you well enough to know that anyone noticing anything small like this about you, freaked you out. Your eyes went wide and filled with something he hadn't seen before.
Holy shit, you were breaking a rule.Â
He chuckled. âSo which one are you breaking, huh?â He had a hunch already, but he really hoped he was wrong, because it would mean heâd had to leave the conversation, find the guy, and beat him up.Â
âItâs not a big deal,â you rolled your eyes again, and he bit his lip. âAnd anyway he just cancelled on me so it doesnât fucking matter,â you shrugged, trying to act like it didnât affect you, but he saw it did. Youâd liked this guy. Youâd been looking forward to it.Â
And he just cancelled, like he didnât have a date with the most wonderful girl in the world.Â
Ok, Lando was definitely beating him up now. âIâm sorry,â he sighed. âThatâs shitty of him. You deserve someone better than that.â Someone like me.  He wanted to say, but he wouldnât push you when you were down. âYou're hot. You're cool. You're ridiculously smart," he listed as you nodded, not exactly believing him, and he decided to switch tactics. "Want to sit on my face to make you feel better? I give really good head?âÂ
You stared at him for a second, disgusted, and then burst out into that laughter he loved to hear so much. He joined you, laughing just as hard.Â
âOh Lando,â you wheezed, shaking your head, a hand on his arm as his entire body warmed at the touch. âNever change, you fucking muppet.âÂ
He smiled like heâd won a race. Meanwhile, he hadnât won the race to your heart yet, but he was definitely a lap up from where he was yesterday, and any progress is good progress.
navigation for my blog :)
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this vertigo of bliss
Dark!New Avenger!Bucky x Scientist!Reader
Summary: You were hired by Val to work alongside the New Avengers in the watch tower. Of course, you werenât superhuman beings like them, but you were a brilliant scientist. And while the team went off on missions in their loud jets with their guns and grenades to fight battles, you stayed and took care of your lab and carried on with your research projects. Always looking for ways that might help your superheroes friends. Be it finding ways to heal their injuries faster, or how to keep them healthier, or understand their modified DNA better so that in the future as they age â albeit slower than most humans â theyâll suffer less. Plus, your research would be useful in case new superhumans popped up out of nowhere, like Bob did. And you were proud of your work, as was the team, but then one day you go down an ambitious rabbit hole and make a mistake. Luckily Bucky is there to save the day. Or is he?Â
Themes: sex pollen trope, mentions of drugs, smut, mild degrading kink, mild breeding kink, dom!bucky, explicit language, c*m play, aftercare

Shit. Shit. Shit.Â
You could hear your own heartbeat, your heart going insane inside your rib cage â a warning sign. This was bad. Very, very bad.Â
You couldnât do anything but stand back and watch the pale smoke fill your lab, reaching every crevice, filling your lungs, coating your skin and leaving it feeling oily and dirty. You gasped for air, the mask over your face completely useless.Â
Shit, what had you done? What the hell had you done?Â
You were well aware it was hubris to even get into those secret HYDRA files on your computer. You knew it was selfish to try and recreate the drugs they used all those decades ago. You knew it. You knew it. It was wrong on so many levels. Thereâs a reason these files are so well hidden.Â
And you told yourself youâd never follow through. That youâd stop right before you created this damned thing. But you couldnât stop. It was so tempting to do what is most forbidden and here you were now, breathing in your mistake.Â
You took the useless mask off, along with your lab coat. Your body was heating up. And you felt feverish. Like in a haze. And you knew what was happening. Youâd read it all this morning. And you knew it would be hours before you felt normal again. Before this itch went away. This animal inside you, suddenly awake and hungry for⌠everything.Â
No, no, no.Â
You could barely stand up.Â
It wasnât supposed to be this potent. You knew nothing would leak outside the lab, it was designed that way for safety, but you still locked the entrance just in case.Â
You blinked a couple of times, trying to reorient yourself as best you could, despite the smoke filling your nose and throat. Nobody was in the tower except you today. The team had left on some mission this morning.Â
Or so you thought.Â
Because as you were holding onto the wall, trying to make sense of what was happening to you, you heard someone knocking on the door.Â
âHey, Doc. You in there?â A deep voice. Bucky. âThe system notified me that something was wrong up here. Are you okay?âÂ
Ah shit. Just his voice was making things worse. Your legs trembled, you were gasping for air. Your body throbbing at the mere thought of him, his hands, his mouth, his touch, hisâÂ
âBucky.â You managed to respond to him. âPlease,â You were getting breathless, almost fucking moaning, mouth watering just at the thought of him standing right there⌠no, no, no. âPlease, donât come in.â You managed to tell him, every fiber of your being wanting nothing more than to just let him use you, let him rut into you, let himâÂ
âUh, you donât sound okay, Doc. Are you hurt?â He asked, the panic and concern very evident in his voice.Â
Fuck. No, he had to leave. Now. He had to leave now.Â
You managed to lean against the cool wall, trying to see past the pure lust coursing through your veins. You breathed slowly. âBucky, you have to leave. Okay? Iâm not hurt. Iâll be fine, you just have to leave. Now. Please.âÂ
âNo,â He argued, sounding worried. âYou donât sound alright. Iâm coming in.â He said. And there was usually no arguing with that tone.Â
âNo,â You whispered weakly. He had access to everything in this tower. Of course he could unlock the door with no problem. And before you could tell him not to, Bucky was in your lab. âBucky, no.â You whispered, unable to speak properly.Â
You felt warm. Hot. Burning. And you could see Buckyâs large frame moving around in the smoke.Â
âDoc, what theâ,â He stopped speaking abruptly. You felt the realisation sinking in, even in him.Â
You felt tears falling down your face. âIâm sorry.â You whispered, watching him get closer to where you stood, âIâm so sorry. Look, just walk away. Weâll wait it out.â It pained you just to say it. âGo away, Bucky.âÂ
âDoc,â His voice was strained as he spoke, âWhat have you done?â His face so somber and blank. He was losing it tooâŚÂ
âIâm sorry.â You apologized again. âI didnât know it wouldâ I thought I could stop. I didnât thinkâŚâ You whimpered as he got closer, your brain â whatever part of it remained coherent and not lust drunk â knew he was feeling it too.Â
That pull. That damned itch. That need to feel, or grab, or bite, or fuck another warm bodyâŚÂ
Bucky stood right in front of you. In full tactical gear. His guns were still strapped to his body. His glorious body⌠strong and muscular.Â
âYouâŚâ You spoke, despite the burning desire of wanting to just throw yourself at him and let him use you however he wanted. âYou have to leave, Buck.â You whimpered, gasping for air, feeling your skin all warm and damp with sweat.Â
He was burning too. His fists clenched. His skin shiny with sweat, his body heat almost radiating off him. He was silent, then he reached for you with his metal hand. Tracing his cold metal fingers down your neck, feeling your quick pulse.Â
âYou know I canât do that.â His fingers carefully wrapped around your throat. He was losing control. âYou know I canât walk away from this. And neither can you.âÂ
Something was different about his voice. Something was darker.Â
âIâve been through this before, Doc.â He leaned in and held your stare. âBelieve me when I say, it gets worse if you donât fuck it out of your system. The first hour is fine. Tolerable. But by the third, the fourth hour⌠you feel like youâre losing your mind. Like youâre not even human anymore. Like you were made just to breed. Like an animal.âÂ
âPlease,â You felt fresh tears fall down your face. The guilt was still there under all the lust and filthy desires. âI didnât mean for this toâ,âÂ
âShh, it doesnât matter. Weâve got each other. We can get out of this.â He leaned in and nuzzled your neck, inhaling your scent which to him felt like the most ambrosial scent ever. âI can make it better.â He promised, pressing his body into yours. âIâll make it feel good.âÂ
You whined, tilting your head back and exposing more of your neck and throat. Surrendering. âBut, BuckyâŚâ You tried, weakly.Â
âDonât fight it.â He said, pulling away from your neck to look into your eyes. âIt gets worse when you fight it, Doc. You know that, donât you?âÂ
That darkness in his eyes was new. You didnât recognise it.Â
âI didnât know it wouldâ,âÂ
He cut you off. âIt would what?â He barked. His icy stare had you frozen in place. âYou didnât know what you were creating?â He taunted, and you noted â even in your own hazy state â that the smoke, the drug, whatever it was, was affecting him way more than it was affecting you. Because judging by his face, his voice, his stare, his movements⌠Bucky was almost completely gone. âHuh? You didnât know what this drug was? You didnât know what it could do? Youâre a smart woman, Doc. Surely you knew what you were makingâŚâÂ
While you were clawing, trying to hold on to your sanity, Buckyâs words were luring over to the other side. âNoâŚâÂ
âYes you did.â He accused. âYou knew all along. And you still made it.âÂ
âPlease, Bucky.â You begged. You begged for⌠you didnât even know what for. All you felt was desire, and pain. A hot pain. Like something inside you contorting, wanting to explode.Â
Bucky smirked, both his hands grabbing you this time. âItâs starting to hurt, isnât it?âÂ
You blinked away the tears and nodded, pleading with him with your eyes. Then you caught yourself, heavy-eyed, mumbling, âMake it better⌠please.âÂ
That did it. That got rid of whatever was making both of you hold back.Â
Bucky picked you up and slammed your back against the wall â all while kissing you hungrily, like his life depended on it. You couldnât even form a proper thought as his tongue slipped into your mouth, making you moan into the kiss.Â
Your hands slid into his ridiculously soft hair and he held you tightly against him. Your core pressed against his firm body as his mouth moved perfectly against yours, driving you crazy. Well, crazier.Â
You didnât care that you were dry humping him, all riled up just from his kiss.Â
âThat feels good, huh? Rubbing yourself on me like that?â He moaned quietly into the kiss as your hand gently tugged on his hair. He smirked and spread your legs apart just a little so he could be closer to you.Â
His hands held you up, securely against him, he had a very firm grip on your thigh, his other hand placed right under your ass â holding you up while he kissed you like there was no tomorrow.Â
âIâm gonna make it better, okay? You hear me, Doc? Iâll make it feel so good.â His lips left yours momentarily to kiss along your jaw, and down your neck, nibbling on your skin and making you moan out loud.Â
He pulled away from you for a moment, and stared into your eyes again. Almost like he was looking for any warning signs which told him to stop, âTell me I can.â He demanded, âTell me I can fuck you however I want. Tell me I can use your body and make us both feel better.â The pleading tone in his voice was hard to ignore.Â
You could tell he was fighting it too. The animalistic, primal urge to fuck. To breed.Â
âYou can.â You told him, wanting. Just wanting. âPlease, Iâll⌠I'll let you do anything. Just make it feel better.âÂ
âYouâre safe with me, okay? I wonât hurt you. I need you to remember that, okay?â His voice sent chills down your back and you didnât want to be all slow and gentle anymore, you simply couldnât wait any longer, so you reached out and started unbuckling his pants, and he helped you by tearing your clothes off, and slipped his hand in between your legs. Your naked, squirming body pressing against his tactical gear felt immoral in a way you couldnât explain.Â
You were wet, embarrassingly so. And even you could tell just by how easily Bucky ran his knuckles along your wet folds, smearing your arousal around in the process. He chuckled right in your ear as you pulled his cock out and stroked it with vigour.Â
âCanât wait, huh?â He slipped his forefinger and his middle finger through your entrance with ease and grunted in your ear as he felt your walls instantly welcoming him in. You could feel your wetness dripping down your inner thighs. He curled his fingers inside of you, hitting all the spots you wanted him too. âJust wanna be fucked badly, donât you?âÂ
âBuckyâŚâ you whimpered and closed your eyes when he leaned down and nibbled on your skin around your collar bones. Something about how desperately, and sinfully his name escaped your lips drove him wild. You bucked your hips against his hand and he chuckled as you moaned out loud while he touched you.Â
Your legs wrapped around his waist as he held you up easily with just his metal hand. The rough material of his gear chafing your skin but you did not care. âBucky,â You whined when you felt his cock briefly brush against your wet folds. âMore, please. Please.â You cried out.Â
âI know, I know. I feel it too.â He kissed down your neck, smirking against your skin and peppering it with kisses as he aligned his throbbing tip with your entrance. âI know, baby. I know it hurts. Iâll make it better, okay? Just let me inâŚâÂ
He pushed himself into you, stretching you out as he went. His nails digging into your skin as he held you by your hips, and yours clawing at his neck, and shoulders as he filled you up nicely. You were both panting by the time he filled you up entirely.Â
He barely gave you a few seconds to adjust to his size before he started rocking in and out of you. You felt all of him, each vein, each stroke brought you to tears with how good he felt.Â
âSo fucking tightâŚâ he whispered against your cheek, more so to himself. âYouâre gonna let me have this tight pussy, huh? Just like that. Hmm? Youâre that much of a little slut youâre not even gonna put up a fight, huh?â He stroked your walls with his pulsating cock and you were moaning against his cheek in no time. He enjoyed every second of it.Â
Both his hands supported you up by grabbing you at the curve of your ass, holding you against him, as he sped up into you. He dipped his head into the crook of your neck and said, âI bet you did it on purpose too, huh? You dirty fucking whore.â He hissed in your ear, cock sliding in and out of you as he fucked you like an animal. His brain running on nothing but pure animalistic instincts. âI see the way you look at me, like a bitch in heat. Youâve probably been plotting this for weeks now. Months even.â Bucky accused. âYou knew everyone else left for that mission this morning and I stayed back. Maybe you knew it was going to be just you and me in the tower, and it all worked in your favour, huh?â His grip was punishing. âYou had me all to yourself. And you knew Iâd come to help you. You knew locking the door from inside wasnât gonna stop me.âÂ
âNoâŚâ You tried to protest, tried to tell him his accusations were wrong. But you could barely talk. âBuckyâŚâÂ
He didnât give you the chance to form coherent sentences. He kept taunting you. âAnd here we are now, Doc. Here I am, at your fucking service. Your good little soldier doing his job. Fucking you like you wanted it.â He let out a cocky chuckle. âAm I doing a good job, Doc? Am I being a good little soldier, fucking you how you want me to? Hmm? Is this good enough for you? Is this what you always dreamt of?âÂ
âBuckâŚâ You gasped. âYou know thatâs not true.â You whined. âI would never⌠never do this on purposeâŚ,â You gasped, âTo you.âÂ
âNo?â He taunted. âBut look how well youâre taking it. Look at you. Look at your body swallowing that cock each time like youâd been practising.â He whispered into your ear, his tone filled with lust and filth, âDid you practise, Doc? Did you fuck your biggest toy each night leading up to this in preparation, huh?âÂ
You moaned out loud again, reciting his name religiously as he slammed into you relentlessly.
He was taking over all your senses and you were more than happy to surrender to him.
You felt the pressure forming, fiery and pressing inside you. While it eased the pain, it also wanted out. It wanted to explode. You needed a release. âPlease, Bucky. Please make me comeâŚâÂ
Bucky nibbled at the skin under your ear and you lost all control you had left. Your thoughts became cloudy and all you could focus on was how his body brought you closer and closerâŚ.Â
âSo fucking goodâŚâ he mumbled softly against your skin while he fucked you like an animal; occasionally growling at how good you felt around him. âBetter than I ever thought.âÂ
Your throbbing clit rubbed against his pelvic bone each time he buried himself completely in you, and he soon quickened his pace â earning more moans from you.
âLook at what you did,â He growled in your ear as he pounded into you as fast as he could, your back slamming into the large wooden front door with each thrust. âTurned me into a fucking animal. All I can think about is making it good for you. All I want is to fill you up, and fucking breed you. Is that what you want? Want my babies inside you?â He rambled, also getting closer. âIâll give it all to you, you know that? Not even worried about it, youâll be a great mommy, wonât you? Wonât you, baby?âÂ
Your body moved along with his, his cock sliding in and out of you like you were just a toy. And you never complained once. You barely listened to what he was saying, all you did was nod and agree with his ramblings. Thinking he didnât mean them. It was the drugs talking, you reminded yourself with whatever sanity you had left.Â
You could hear the wet sounds caused each time he pushed himself into you and the sounds of your skin slapping against each other. It was downright sinful.Â
He moaned against your ear and the sound sent shivers down your back. âPerfect fucking pussy, fuck, you feel like heaven,â He gasped, âCould fuck you all day and do nothing else. Right here in between your legs, huh? Is this where you want me all the time, Doc?â He hissed in pleasure, âYeah? Does that feel good? Do I feel good inside you?âÂ
âYes,â Your legs started to shake around him as he quickened his pace, pounding into you mercilessly. âFuck⌠yes, you feel so good.âÂ
You felt like you were losing your mind. The pleasure was too much and you couldnât hold back anymore. So, you came undone around his cock, screaming his name out loud in the empty lab. Walls clenching around him, nails scratching down his neck.Â
âThatâs it, baby. There we go, that feels good, huh?â His thrusts became irregular as he came right after you did, cock throbbing against your pulsating walls as he emptied inside you.Â
âOh fuckâŚ.â You could feel his warmth filling you up. âThat feelsâŚâÂ
âCome here.â He pulled out of you and grabbed you by the wrist, pulling you towards your nearby desk, and pushed you on it, making you sit on the edge, legs dangling for a moment as he grabbed your face and gave you a punishing kiss. âNeed more from you, you hear me? Be good and give it to me, okay?âÂ
You were too far gone to even care what position he had you in, all you wanted was him. Inside you. All you cared about was how heâd make the pain go away. So when Bucky grabbed your legs and placed them on the edge of the desk, opening you up to him completely, you let him.Â
He placed his hands on your thighs and spread them further apart and took his time inspecting your wet folds. He mindlessly dragged a finger up and down your slit, making you shiver and moan as he touched you, occasionally fingering his cum back into you.Â
âI wanna see what we taste like together.â He whispered, kneeling down.Â
His eyes trailed up to your tits, and his other hand reached up to pinch a nipple, making you yelp. He chuckled, âSo pretty, and all mine to play with, yeah?â He whispered, getting down on his knees so his mouth was mere inches away from your clit. âNow, keep your legs spread for me. Just like this. Okay?âÂ
You nodded, looking down in between your legs as he leaned in and pressed his ravenous mouth shamelessly to your wetness.Â
His tongue, his lips, the gentle suction of his warm mouth â it was all too much. He moved his head side to side, his coarse stubble brushing against your soft inner thighs. You whined and trembled, trying to keep your voice down as he made you lose your mind by eating you out like a starved man.Â
Then he looked up, meeting your eyes as the lower half of his face was completely submerged into your wet cunt. And that did it. You came with a yelp and a moan, riding his face and tugging on his hair.Â
He got up quickly and grabbed your face, breathing heavily with wetness all over his lips, âYou wanna taste us together? Yeah? Wanna see how good we are?âÂ
You nodded, delirious. And he leaned in to kiss you again. A messy, warm, filthy kiss. Bucky only pulled away when you were breathless and begging him to stop. He was panting by the time he was done abusing your mouth.Â
Then he looked down at your cunt, seeing the way wetness kept oozing out your hole.Â
âLook at that,â He looked down in between your spread, trembling legs and pointed at the little puddle of wetness youâd left there on top of the desk. âYou made a mess, baby. Better clean it up.âÂ
He pulled you off the desk and bent you over, pushing your face down, right into the little puddle youâd created there when you came for him.Â
âI said clean it!â He hissed, sliding his cock back inside you from behind. âLet me see that tongue licking all that up.â He growled, âYes, thatâs it. Lick it clean, baby, come on.â He pressed down on the back of your neck, refusing to let go. âDid you get it all cleaned up? Huh? Give me a taste of that then, come here,â He pulled you up, manhandling you however he wanted. He grabbed your face and turned it to the side to kiss your open, wet, and warm mouth. You were panting by now. He didnât care, he took whatever he wanted. Shoving his tongue into your mouth and sucking your taste, stealing it.Â
He pulled away and that wild look in his eyes made you throb. âSo fucking goodâŚâ Then he spat in your mouth and pushed you back down, bending you over your desk again and went back to fucking you from behind, keeping a tight grip on the back of your neck.Â
You whimpered as his pelvic bone smacked against your ass each time he thrust into you.Â
âLook at that body,â He mumbled. âLook at how perfect you are.â He teased, âWho knew our resident, nerdy little scientist would be such a filthy little slut for me, huh?â He slowed down, grabbing your neck and pulling you back into his chest, getting closer to your ear as he said, âIs that what you are now, Doc? Are you my little slut? Tell me. Tell me youâre my little slut and I can breed you whenever I want to. Tell me I get to use you whenever I feel like it.â He hissed, âFucking tell me.âÂ
You whimpered, âYes I am. I am your little slut, please just⌠you can do whatever you want, Bucky, just please make me come.âÂ
Bucky chuckled, cocky now that heâd heard all that he wanted to hear. âYes you are, baby. A perfect little slut for me. Just for me.âÂ
Then he resumed fucking you like an animal. His moans and groans loud in your ear.Â
âYou better come for me, slut.â He growled into your ear. âYou hear me? Come on this cock, come on. I want it wet with your cum.âÂ
His words made you delirious. Lust drunk even more than ever before. You moaned as he reached every single sensitive spot inside you. You felt a familiar warmth taking over you, and a pressure building in between your hips.Â
âOhâŚâ You whined, âBucky, Iâm gonna come.â You cried, and you were pretty sure you had warm tears streaming down your face.Â
âCome on, baby. Come on. Let me fill you up again, huh? Youâre gonna just be a good girl and take it, huh? Youâll just be nothing but a cum dump for me, thatâs it, angel. Milk that fucking cock, itâs all yours baby⌠all yours.âÂ
You couldnât hold it any longer. And you came all over his cock, crying with hot tears down your face.Â
âYes⌠look at you.â He cooed, his voice laced with lust and desire. âYou come so good for me.â He slammed his cock harder into you, and your eyes watered even more. He felt agonisingly good, even though you were so sensitive that each stroke had you whimpering and trembling.Â
Bucky came right after you, grunting and sighing in pleasure. His warm load shooting inside you as your body shook against the desk.Â
âFuck, angel, youâre so full of my cum.â He pulled out and pushed back into you, a shallow thrust, as if to test something out. âThere, I can feel it all inside you.âÂ
Your mind was a foggy mess. The lab was clearer now though, no more smoke poisoning your brains. But there was enough in both your systems that Bucky only had to wait another minute, before he was ready to go again.Â
Turning you around and stepping in between your legs and slid back into you again. âItâs getting better, huh? The pain? Are you okay, baby?âÂ
You just nodded and let him take over.Â
A few slow strokes, then the animal in him took the reins again. Bucky fucked hard and fast into you, his teeth bruising your lips. His mouth swallowing your moans, as he whispered against your open mouth, âItâs all yours, all fucking yours. This is what you wanted, huh? This cock is all you wanted? Shouldâve just asked, baby. You didnât have to do all this. Shouldâve just looked up at me with those pretty eyes, gave me one of those please fuck me looks and i wouldâve done it.â He chuckled, ending with a loud moan. âFuck, I wouldâve done it. I wouldâve taken care of you so fucking goodâŚâÂ
âPlease,â You begged, âPlease, Bucky, can youâ,â A loud moan escaping your mouth cut you off.Â
âWhat?â He hissed.Â
âI want to taste you, please come in my mouth.â You asked, your brain barely registering what you were asking for.Â
He chuckled, âNo, no, no. I can't waste all this.â He reasoned. âThis goes in you, right? Thatâs why you did all of this? To be pumped full of my cum, right? So no, baby. Canât waste it all by shoving all this down your throat instead of in your womb.â He teased, âSorry, but not this time.âÂ
Moments later, you were coming undone loudly while Bucky was spilling inside you, some of it oozing out all around his cock, which was still snug inside you. âThere,â He gathered some on his finger tips, chuckling, âI guess you can have some of it.â He shoved his fingers into your mouth, which you greedily sucked on like it was fucking ambrosia. Bucky hissed, âYeah, you like that? The taste of me?âÂ
You nodded, his fingers still deep into your mouth.Â
âYou want more?â He asked. Â
You nodded again.Â
âLetâs go then. I need a bed to properly break you in.âÂ
â
Hours later, finally satiated, Bucky decided you two could stop now. That agonising hunger subsided.Â
He was spent. As were you. And he had barely any energy left. But he made an effort, hissing as he got up and out of bed, feeling all his muscles screaming after hours of non-stop fucking. He stood there, stretching his limbs a little as he looked over at you.Â
You were buried under his blankets and pillows, only your pretty face was visible. And your eyes were shutting more and more. Bucky leaned over and caressed your face, waking you up gently. âHey, baby. Wake up.â He whispered gently. âI need you to drink something, okay? Donât fall asleep just yet.âÂ
You whined, âJust wanna sleep.â You mumbled.Â
âI know, I know.â Bucky walked over to his mini fridge and got some sugary drinks out. âBut you need to drink this, okay.â He walked back to bed and forced you up, pulling you onto his lap so he could better observe whether you were drinking all of it or not. âCome on, have some more. You need it, angel, please.â He reasoned, kissing your shoulder, and rubbing your thighs.Â
You finished your drink, and leaned back against Bucky, thankful for his warm chest and his strong arms holding you up.Â
âI got you, angel, I got you,â He murmured, his hands rubbing all over you. He didnât care that he was smearing his own cum all over your thighs and abdomen, it felt weirdly good. Like he was marking you. âIâm sorry I got so rough earlier,â He apologised, kissing your shoulder. âYou just felt so good, I wanted your body to bend and break for me.â He kissed your tired body wherever he could, âAm I forgiven?â He kissed your neck until it tickled, âHmm? Do you forgive me for being rough earlier?âÂ
He earned a sleepy drowsy giggle. âYes, Buck.â You answered, letting him tuck you back in bed. âNeed to shower,â You mumbled.Â
Bucky answered, saying, âLater, baby.â And he kept kissing you, murmuring praises and post-sex rambles into your ear. âYouâre perfect, you know that?â He spooned you from behind, not minding the sticky, sweaty mess you both were. âMy perfect girlâŚâÂ
You were too close to falling asleep to note the change in his tone. The slight darkness lacing his words. Still.Â
Bucky pressed his body to yours, caging you in his arms. Then noticed the way you backed up into him, purposely because you did it twice.Â
âAgain?â He asked you, chuckling when you nodded at his question, your butt pressing into his crotch as you drifted off⌠barely conscious and letting out the tiniest, softest moans as he slid his cock back inside you. Hard already. With ease. Fucking you slowly and enjoying the feeling of your wet warmth wrapped around him.Â
He knew your body by heart now, so even in the dark he let his hands roam all over you. Touching you exactly where you needed to be touched.Â
You let out a sleepy whimper, âMhmm,â And mumbled some nonsense, â...feels so good.â You let out a sigh. âGonna need you all the time now.âÂ
âI know, baby.â Bucky murmured, already spilling inside you. Filling you up with his cum again. âI know it feels good.â He tightened his arms around you, left his cock snug inside you and pulled you closer to him, whispering against the back of your neck, âAnd we wouldâve never known how good it can be if I hadnât intervened to speed things up, now would we?âÂ
How long had he yearned for this? For you? Months maybe. But you were always so cautious, always so proper. Always so distant and with frozen, icy walls around your heart. Bucky could never get in. But he wanted you. Oh, how he wanted you since the day he first saw you.Â
Gods⌠it was so easy to sneak those files into your computer. And he knew you were so curious by nature that you wouldnât have been able to resist looking into them. And once you looked, you wouldnât be able to resist trying to recreate something so forbidden.Â
All he had to do was let you believe that heâd left that morning with the team as well. But he never did. He planned things too well. Stalled just enough so that right as they were about to take off, Bucky was able to pull back. Showing everyone that the system had alerted him that there was something going on in the lab. The team agreed that Bucky would stay behind and deal with that while they went away and carried on with the mission.Â
So then, just as he had planned, you two were all alone in the tower and he was at the lab at the right time. Barging in to get you out, like a hero. And accidentally inhaled all that vapour that drove him wildâŚÂ
And here he was now. His plan was well executed.Â
Bucky playfully bit your skin, tasting you like you were there just for that. âYou played your part well, baby. Thank you for that.â He smiled upon hearing another one of those sleepy moans escaping your mouth. âAnd now youâre all mine.â He whispered into your ear.Â
â
a/n: what? I was horny okayâŚ
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Been Keeping It Down
Main Masterlist - Dean Masterlist
Read on A03!
Tags: Dean Winchester/Female Reader, friends to lovers, light fluff, light angst, lotta smut (fingering, p in v, cockwarming), humor, love confessions
Summary/Warnings: After Dean gets hit with a curse, he starts avoiding you. Sam won't tell you what's wrong, and you love him almost as much as you miss him.
Almost as much as he might love you.
Author's Note: Request from an anon! I love thinking a fic will be 5k and then. it's not.
Word Count: 8.3k
âWhyâd you lock him in the car?â
âUh,â Sam scratches the back of his neck, letting out a long, slow breath. âI didnât. He sorta locked himself in there.â
Your nose wrinkles, and you lean a little further down, trying to get a better look at Dean.
Heâs sprawled out on the back bench, knocked out and drooling onto the seat.Â
He looks adorable.
His hair is mussed, his eyes keep fluttering slightly, and if you climbed over him heâd probably be just as strong and warm as when he yanks you into his chest, making sure you donât stumble or trip during a hunt.Â
You canât crawl over him while heâs asleep. Youâre not sure if heâd want you to, or if youâd just get shoved off his body with a grunt and glower. Ruining everything, and bombing the careful fantasy youâve built where maybe Dean flirts with you a little more than other girls, and maybe he gets so pissed at you because he cares, and thereâs a small, thin chance that he likes catching you just as much as you like falling into him.
And youâre never going to tell him you do it on purpose. That itâs dumb, and reckless, and pathetic, but sometimes youâll be a little less cautious, just so Dean will grab you. So his arms will wrap around your stomach, heâll glare at you with enough venom to make your skin hot, and you can smile up at him like nothingâs wrong. It couldnât be, as long as Dean was holding you.
But something is certainly wrong right now.
âAnd he let you drive?â
Sam shrugs awkwardly. âHeâs sick.
You give him a flat look. âIâve seen Dean drive when he was actively bleeding out.â
âFrom his stomach.â
âSo?â
âItâs- He could still drive.â Samâs voice is lame, as if he doesnât even believe what heâs saying. âThis was a fever. Heâs not lucid.â
âSam.â Thereâs panic rising in your chest, hot and tight and suffocating, but you force your voice to remain flat. âIf heâs not lucid, we need to take him to a hospital-â
âNo! I-â Samâs eyes widen, darting between you and Dean at a frantic pace. âItâs- Heâs fine! Itâs a magic fever.â
âA magic fever-â
âWitches. He hates them.â
âI know that-â
âHe just needs to sleep it off,â Samâs voice is suddenly firm and determined, and something is very wrong. âItâll be easier if we donât bother him.â
âBut-â
âCan you got get some ice from town?â
You frown. âWe have ice.â
âRight.â Sam glances back to Dean. âWhat donât we have?â
âI donât know, I donât do audits while you guys are gone-â
âDo we have soda?â
âI donât know-â
âPie?â
You let out a long, slow breath, and Sam is very close to being punched in the face. âWe have pie. We always have pie. Sam, whatâs going on-â
âI just- I need to get Dean out of the car. And I-â Sam swallows, giving you an apologetic look. âIâm not supposed to let you help.â
Your mouth falls open, something tearing up your chest thatâs made of Dean doesnât want your help, he knows how useless you really are and he canât even imagine you carrying him to bed.
Sam must see the shatter of your heart, just a layer under your face, because he shakes his head, and his words are quick.
âNo itâs- itâs not like that-â
âIâm fine.â You mumble, drawing yourself to stand tall, keeping your gaze firmly fixed away from Dean. âYou donât have to-â
âHe might be contagious.â
You give him a dry look. âYouâre still going to touch him, though.â
âI was in the car with him.â Sam mutters, not fully meeting your gaze. âIâm already exposed. And there are some, uh- Weird side effects. To the curse.â
âWeird? Weird like-â You cut yourself off at Samâs apologetic expression, letting out another heavy sigh. âYou canât tell me.â
âHe just- You know Dean. Itâs a weird curse, and doesnât want you to have to deal with it-â
âI wouldnât mind.â You mumble, frowning down at your hands, and you can feel Samâs look of pity.
âI told him that, he⌠Didnât seem to care.â
You glance up, and your voice has to remain neutral. Youâre almost certain Sam knowsâhe must, heâs seen you trail after Dean like a shadow on every case, laugh at all his stupid jokes, run to him whenever he so much as stubs his toe, and glare at him every time he gets hit on and basks in it because you love him too much to hate him for it, and that makes your skin blisterâbut that doesnât mean you have to admit it.
It doesnât matter if you admit it.Â
Even if Dean flirts with you, itâs still just flirting. He flirts with everyone. And heâs never really shown that heâd want anything more with you. Maybe just skin on skin in the dark, but not his lips on your brow in the morning, and you head resting on his chest in the dead of night.Â
Not what youâd need. What youâve needed, from the moment he appeared over you on the street, both of you drenched in the blood of a decapitated vamp, Dean offering you a hand that once you took, you never wanted to release.Â
But Sam knows that too. He was there when Dean asked you to stick with them, and you had an expression like the Sun had dropped at your feet and asked you to orbit around it forever. Samâs noticed that you never even try to sleep around, and that whenever someone hits on you at a bar you never take it past smiles and words.Â
You think Sam believes you have more dignity than you actually do, though. That if Dean offered you just one night, you wouldnât take it in a heartbeat. That youâd keep coming back like an addict, until Dean decided he was done giving you what you crave. Sam thinks you wouldnât break yourself for Dean.Â
Itâs sweet, that he thinks that highly of you.
That doesnât make him right.
âCan you-â You pause, trying to find the right thing to say, that will just give you a chance to help. âIf thereâs anything-â
âIâm gonna talk to him. Heâs being- You know.â
Sam glances back to Dean, and you do know. Deanâs never been good at asking for help.Â
Heâs still fully knocked out and snoring so loud you can hear it through the windows.Â
Still adorable.
And when heâs finally up, and feeling better, youâre going to shove his stupid, broad chest and yell at him that no magical side-effect could ever make you not want to help.
For now, youâre going to take one of the spare cars and drive in circles, until the ache in your chest hurts just a little less. And when Dean calls for you, youâll be there.
Youâll always be there.
But he doesnât call for you.
The day passes and turns into night, and the night turns into another day, and then suddenly itâs all blurring together and itâs been a week. And you havenât spoken to Dean once.
You only know heâs in the bunker because you can see the light from under his door, and food is vanishing that Sam would never touch. When you wake up thereâs enough coffee left over for you to have a cup, just like every morning, but usually Dean is leaning against the counter and waiting for you to join him. Now itâs just the mug out and the pot half-full. Same as how books keep going missing from the library before reappearing the next day, but Dean never once even wanders into the room. The Impala is gone for hours, and then youâll check the garage again and itâs back. Dinner gets made, but you never see it. Dean doesnât appear over your shoulder in the library and call you to dinner, you just wander into the kitchen and find it made.
âHeâs avoiding me.â
Sam shakes his head, not looking up from his laptop. âNo, heâs not.â
âI havenât seen him once-â
âHeâs still sick.â
âSam-â
Sam says your name back, and when he looks up, thereâs a heavy exhaustion in his gaze. âIâm working on it. Heâll be fine, the fever broke, but Dean- I canât tell you.â
âWhy.â Your voice is desperate, but the ache in your chest has only grown. You miss him. Even ignoring the in love with him thing, Deanâs your best friend. You miss talking to him while he cooks, and bothering him with the books youâve read, and trying to see who can fit the most marshmallows in their mouth.Â
But heâs avoiding you. Even if Sam wonât say it, you know he is. Youâve tried to catch him. You get up an hour earlier, but heâs already gone. You try and stay up for a whole day just to see himâto make sure heâs okay, and that he didnât die and Sam just hasnât figured out how to tell youâbut you pass out around 4am and wake up with a blanket over your body, and another three books gone. The next time the Impala is gone you sit in the garage all day, leave once to go to the bathroom, and come back to it returned and Dean nowhere in sight.
You donât understand why.
âI-â Sam exhales, shaking his head again. âI wish I could tell you. But that- You know I trust you. Dean trusts you. But explaining it- Iâd be violating Deanâs trust. Iâm sorry.â
He looks it. Samâs expression is tired, and you can hear the strain in his voice, but it doesnât make anything hurt less.Â
Deanâs avoiding you.
And you just want to see him. To know whatâs wrong, so you can tell him you donât care about the curse.
That evening, you try to camp the kitchen. Dinner never comes out that night, and around eight, Sam wanders in and asks if you can just order.
âNo.â You mutter, sitting cross-legged on the counter, and Sam sighs.
âIâm hungry,â he says your name with a pleading tone. âI know youâre hungry too. And Iâm going to order for myself, so just text me if you want anything and Iâll pick it up while Iâm out-â
âI donât want anything.â
Sam gives you a sympathetic look, and you want to curl into yourself and hide. It canât be that obvious. Even if Sam knows, thereâs no way he knows-
âIf youâre waiting for him, heâs not going to come out.â
You scowl, shooting Sam a glare. âSo he is avoiding me.â
Sam sighs your name. âI- Yeah. He is.â
âWhy-â
âI canât-â
âTell me.â You finish for him, rubbing at your face as you continue, until itâs raw enough to hurt a little. âYeah, I got it. Is he-â You have to swallow on a lump in your throat. âIs he okay?â
âHe will be.â Sam mutters. âI- I think Iâve almost got it.â
âCan I help?â
Sam shakes his head, and you swallow, leaning down until your back is flat on the table.
âOkay.â
âDo you, uh- Want anything?â
You want to help. To understand.Â
Dean.
You want Dean.
âNo.â
Thereâs a silence for a second, and youâre convinced Sam is gone, right up until he mutters your name. His voice is impossibly soft.
It just makes this hurt more.Â
âHeâs in his room. And he knows youâre in here. Heâs not going to come out.â Sam sighs. âIâll be back in a few hours.â
You frown at the ceiling, trying to work out what that means, but by the time you sit up Sam is gone.Â
Deanâs in his room. And heâs not going to come out. And it does not take a few hours to pick up dinner, but Sam will be gone anyway, and-Â
Oh.Â
Okay.
You slide off the counter, keeping your steps soft as you walk down the hall, and stop in front of Deanâs room.
âDean?â You knock, and heâs not a subtle as he thinks he is.Â
The noise from the TV turns off.Â
âDean,â You knock again, still to no answer. âI know youâre in there.â
Nothing.Â
âDean Winchester, if you donât open the door, Iâm going to break it in-â
âDonât.â
His voice is barely a grunt. But itâs the first time you heard it in a fucking week, and a sob rises to your throat.Â
Heâs alive. He can talk, and heâs been avoiding you, but heâs okay.Â
âFuck, Dean, are you-â
âDonât come in here.â His voice is rising slightly, and something starts to prickle over your skin.Â
Itâs the same feeling you get on a hunt, when something is just a little off.Â
A warning.
âDean-â
âPlease.â Thereâs a desperation in his voice, and it just makes the prickle grow into a stinging itch. âDonât.â
âDonât-â You swallow. âDonât what?â
You can hear his deep breath through the door. âCome inside.â
âDe-â
âJust- If you need something, go ask Sammy-â
âI donât need anything, Dean.â I just need you. âI want to talk.â
Thereâs a beat of silence, and then, âWeâre talking right now.â
âThis doesnât count, I want to see you-â
âNo.â
âDean-â
âIâm not dying,â Dean snaps your name. âYou donât need to help.â
Thereâs a harsh tone to his voice that youâve rarely heard in your direction. The tone he uses on hunts and when he and Sam are fighting. His pissed tone.
Heâs serious.
But itâs only making the itch feel like a burn. You need to see him. Just for one second, so you know heâs not lying, and he has to look you in the eyes and admit that heâs been avoiding you. He doesnât get to be pissed when heâs been dodging you. Thatâs not how this fucking works.
You want to help, still.
But Dean does not get to be angry about that.
âIâm going to open the door.â
Dean hisses your name. âIâm tellinâ you, donât-â
âI won���t if you give me a reason-â
âI donât want you to see me.â
You freeze, your hand hovering up to push open the door, and your heart might have frozen and dropped into your stomach.Â
He didnât want you. Doesnât want you. Not just your help, but to see you at all. He doesnât want you, and your heart is fracturing in strange places you didnât know it could breakâbut you should have, only Dean has ever been able to touch themâand Dean doesnât want you-
âFuck, are you- Son of a bitch-âÂ
Thereâs a shuffling and banging sound from the other side of the door, and the world is blurry. It might have something to do with the soreness in your throat and the choked sound you couldnât stop from escaping.Â
âDonât cry, sweetheart-â
âIâm not.â You take a step back from the door, your hand falling back to your side. âI- Samâs out, if you need something, call him.â
âI know, itâs-â He sounds closer than before. âItâs complicated, but Iâm not pissed at you-â
âSo why are you avoiding me.â
The silence is tight. Long. You can hear Deanâs heavy breathing through the door, and your fingers are straining to touch him, to make it better, but he doesnât want you.
âIâm not crying, Dean.â Your voice has to be neutral. He already has your heart resting somewhere stronger than just the palm of his hand, he doesnât get to have every other piece of you too. Not when heâd only toss it right back. âI know you got cursed, and I know you donât want my help, but you donât need to be- I would help. Iâd always help. Youâre my friend-â
Thereâs a dry, slightly muffled chuckle through the door. âFriend, huh.â
âYeah, I am.â You raise your chinâhe canât see it, but it makes you feel betterâand narrow your eyes at the door. âAnd I know youâre avoiding me, so don't try to deny it-â
âCanât.â
You blink. âWhat?â
âCanât deny it.â He grunts. âIâve been avoiding you.â
âI- Oh.â The world is getting blurry again. He doesnât get to have the rest of you. âWhy?â
Dean groans, and you flinch as a heavy thud sounds from his room. âFuck.â
âDean-â
âDonât ask me that.â He grunts, his voice right on the other side of the door. âPlease.â
âI- Why?â
âGoddamnit, just stop asking me questions-â
âDean, I need to know-â
âNo, you donât.â
âYes, I do-â
âTrust me,â he mutters your name. âYou donât.â
You scowl at the door.Â
He doesnât get to do this. No matter what type of righteous shit heâs got in his head, no matter what this curse is, Dean doesnât get to just say heâs avoiding you, then not say why. Doesnât get to tell you what to do when he wonât look at you.Â
Doesnât get to have all of you if he doesnât really want it.
âDean Winchester.â You move your hand back to the door, and you could swear you hear him stiffen. âYou do not get to tell me what I need.â
He chuckles again, and you can hear it this time. The pain in the sound. âThen youâre just gonna have to trust me on this one-â
âI canât trust you.â You cut him off with a snap. âNot when you wonât answer my questions. You can even lie, you just have to be convincing-â
âI- Fuck- I canât!â
Deanâs voice has risen to a shout, and you pause. He sounds wounded. Like a distressed animal.
âI canât goddamn lie.â He grunts, his voice lowered to something heavy. âThe witch truth-roofied me, and I canât say a lie.â
You frown. âThen why the fuck have you been avoiding me?â
âI- Shit,â he groans again. âThere are some questions I donât want you asking me. Safer for all of us.â
âSafer for you to ignore me-â
âI havenât been ignoring you.â
âWe havenât spoken since you got back-â
âCause Iâve been avoiding you-
âWhich is better?âÂ
He pauses, his voice falling to a mumble. âNo.â
You let out a soft, insane sounding laugh. Youâre going to strangle him, or hug him, or shove him off a cliff before diving after him. Heâs not stupid, but he can be such a fucking idiot.
âWhat were you planning on doing, when the curse was broken?â You lean against the door, keeping your voice dry. âJust popping up and acting like nothing ever happened?â
âUh-â Dean coughs. âYeah? Are you pissed at me?â
âYes.â
âOh-â
âBut.â You hum, watching the door as if you might be able to see Dean through it. âIâll be less pissed if you tell me why.â
You can feel his glare. âI told you why, truth curse-â
âThatâs a stupid reason. I know everything about you.â
Thereâs the chuckle again. âNo, you donât.â
âYeah, I do-â
âI told you to trust me-â
âAnd I told you I canât.â You take a slow, stuttering breath. âPlease, Dean, weâll be fine if you just tell me the truth-â
âNo.â
âDean-â
âYou donât want to know the truth-â
âI donât even know that youâre actually cursed with that!â Your voice is rising, but heâs such an idiot, and you love him, and most of what you can feel is hot. Worry or anger or stress or just want. You want to see him, to help him, to punch him in the face and trust him. But you canât. âFor all I know, youâre lying to me right now-â
Your words are cut off with a yelp as the door swings open, and you stumble a step forward, right into-
Dean.
Heâs catching you. Keeping your upright by pressing you right to his chest, his hands framing your face and his eyes boring right into yours.Â
And he looks tiredâbags under his eyes and his hair a little messy from lack of careâbut heâs still Dean. Still the most beautiful thing youâve ever seen, strong and hot around you, a growl in his voice that you can feel vibrate through his chest as he speaks.Â
âAsk me something.âÂ
You blink at him. âYou said-â
âNot that. Anything else.â
âI-â You swallow, unable to break his gaze. âCan you tell me something embarrassing?â
His jaw twitches, but you get a firm nod. âI used to hide hentai mags in Samâs bag, so chicks wouldnât see them and think they were mine. One time I ate a pie off a girlâs stomach, and I enjoyed the pie more than the sex. I tried one of Samâs running smoothies and it wasnât dogshit, but then I spent twenty hours of the toilet after. Body wasnât ready for it, I guess. Uh- One time I got turned on by holding a book-â
âA book?â You frown at him. âWhat book?â
âUh, Wicked.â
âOh. I love that book.â
âI know.â He mutters, scanning over you carefully. âDo I look like Iâm lying?âÂ
âNo,â you whisper, your hands shoot up to hold Deanâs against your face. âI- No.â
âGood. You trust me?â
âI- Dean, I still need you to tell me why.â
Deanâs jaw tightens, his nostrils flaring slightly.Â
You might be about to melt. Youâve never been this close to him, heâs never looked at you like thisâas if he wouldnât mind only looking at you for the rest of your life, or maybe heâd just like to eat you aliveâand thereâs a firmness to his voice thatâs lighting a fire in your core.Â
âI told you not to ask me that.â He mutters, and you shake your head.
âI need to know, Dean, please.â You pull your lips between your teeth. âYou didnât even talk to me, and you told Sam not to tell me, and it really- It wasnât-â You swallow, your voice turning to almost a whine, and you canât stop it. âThat wasnât fair, I thought you were mad at me and I just- I wanted to help-â
âI know you did, baby.â Dean sighs, and your lips part slightly.Â
Baby.
âIâd never be mad at you,â he runs his thumb over your cheekbone, and itâs becoming really hard to not give him all of you. âI- Youâre just- I-â
Heâs moving before you know whatâs happening. Diving down and pulling you up at the same time, crashing his mouth against yours with almost a bloody desperation, and you did melt. Youâre all heat as your fingers curl against his chest, and his lips mold perfectly against yours, and heâs kissing you like youâre going to disintegrate and heâs going to die and heâs kissing you-
Itâs over as soon as it starts. Your head is spinning, and your lips are already swollen from the bruising force of his kiss, but Deanâs drawing back with an almost frantic expression, stumbling back and leaving your swaying into the middle of the room.Â
âI- Son of a bitch- Iâm sorry-â
You blink at him, still a little dazed. âYouâre sorry?â
Dean nods, running a hand through his hair and shaking his head. âShit- I shouldnât have done that, sweetheart, I-â
âWhy?â Your voice is soft, and he frowns at you.Â
âYou- I didnât-â
âDean.â You force yourself to stand tall, wrapping your arms around your stomach. He canât do this. Just kiss you like that then say it shouldnât have happened. He fucking kissed you. âPlease just tell me why. I- You canât just ignore me then do that and not say- You have to tell me why-â You wonât cry. âPlease-â
âI love you.â
Time might not be moving. Deanâs just staring at you from across the room, and you canât really feel your legs, and-Â
âWhat?â You whisper, and he shakes his head.
âI- I fucking love you.â He mutters, his gaze falling down to the floor. âAnd I know you deserve better, I do- But I always wanna tell you, and I wouldâve, so I had to- I wasnât tryinâ to piss you off, and I- Goddamnit, I never wanna make you cry, but you shouldnât have to worry about turning me down-â
Itâs your turn to move. You cross the room before Dean can keep saying stupid things, grab the collar of his shirt, and yank him back down into a kiss.
Itâs even better than the first one. Dean falls into you in half a second, his arms flying out to hold you right to his chest, almost lifting you off the ground as he pushes his tongue between your lips, then groaning down your throat when you nip at it and wrap an arm around his neck. He tastes so good, and he fits better against you than you thought possible, and his hands are roaming all over you like heâs trying to check youâre real.Â
Youâve never felt more real. Thereâs a wildfire spreading through your body, building as broad fingers brush against the bare skin of your back, and Deanâs mouth is starting to wander, sucking your upper lip between his teeth before starting to kiss down your neck, and his hand squeezes against your ass-
You move back, shoving his chest with all the strength you have, and he stumbles away, blinking at you with a wide, lust-blown expression.
âNever,â you poke his chest, glaring up at his dumbstruck, handsome face. âDo that again. I have loved you since I met you, Dean, you fucking idiot, and if you ever pull something like that again, I will shoot you with the gun you gave me.â
Dean blinks at you, and his face splits into a wide grin. âYou love me?â
âOf course I love you-â
âAwesome.â He takes a step forward, and you stop him with a palm on his chest.
âNot awesome, Dean, Iâm still mad at you-â
Your words turn into an unconvincing sigh as Dean grabs your wrist and tugs you forward, pulling you back into a longer, deeper kiss.Â
Itâs slow and soft, like you have all the time in the universe, and you feel as if youâre floating. Like everything is only light and warmth and the taste of Dean, lingering on your tongue when he hums against your lips, and pulls back with another wide, boyish grin.
âHereâs the deal, babygirl.â He tangles a hand in your hair, tipping your head back until your gaze is locked onto his. âYou can kick my ass later, but right now Iâd really like to give you a reason to stop being pissed at me. You want that?â
You pause, your fingers playing with the hair on the nape of his neck. âI still get to be mad later?â
Dean nods, leaning down to suck on the soft skin of your neck, and you canât stop the moan that escapes your mouth.Â
âDean-â
âLemme show you how much I mean it,â he hums against your skin. âCanât lie right now, sweetheart, and youâre the prettiest things Iâve ever goddamn seen. Fuckinâ hated avoiding you, missed you so much-â
âI- Missed you too-â
âI know you did, câmon, lemme take care of you-â
âOkay.â
He pulls back, watching you carefully. âYou sure?âÂ
You nod eagerly, and his face splits back into a grin.
âReady?â
âYeah,â your voice is breathy, and Deanâs grin widens.Â
But he doesnât get to get off that easy.Â
âWhat do you want to do to me, Winchester?â You give him a teasing smirk, and his hands tense on your waist. âIf youâve been thinking about it that muchâŚâ
You raise your brows in a silent suggestion, and Dean groans.
âThatâs not playing fair,â he leans back down, and you dodge, moving to kiss along his jawline.Â
âTell me what you want-â
âYouâre starting something, sweetheart,â his words sound pushed through his teeth, and you giggle.Â
âAnd youâre dodging the question- Dean-â
You squeak as his hand tangles in your hair, and he yanks you back to meet his gaze.Â
He looks almost feral. Darkened eyes and full, swollen lips that are already parted with heavy breath. Youâre pressed right against him, and his hand still on your waist is kneading your skin until youâre almost melted in the sheer heat and want, and-
Heâs pressed right against your thigh. Hard. Big.
The ache between your legs is unbearable. You might come apart from nothing at all.
Or just from the sound of Deanâs voice, deep and rough and filled with hunger.
âIâve wanted you since I saw you, baby,â he mutters, and when your hands shoot up to wrap around his neck and tug at his hair, a soft moan escapes his lips. âSon of a bitch, I want you all the fuckinâ time-â
âHow?â You whisper, and his eyes flash.
âYou really wanna know, sweet girl?â Dean starts to walk you backwards, towards his bed, and lets out a hiss when you yank on his hair again.Â
âIâm asking-â
âIâve thought about everything,â his voice is almost a growl, and you squeak as he tosses you back onto the mattress. âThought about eating you out until you screamed, or just touching you to see what kinda sounds youâd make,â Dean pulls his shirt of as you gape up at him, before crawls over you with a wide grin. âHad dreams about those freakinâ sounds, how youâd moan for me if I did this-â
One big hand slides under your shirt, palming at your breasts before rolling a nipple between two fingers, and you fall fully back with a gasp.Â
âDean-â You grab at his shoulders, squirming below him, and his grin grows, his hand wandering over to the other breast to repeat the movement. âOh, god.â
âNope.â Dean leans down, kissing you slow and deep, his hand starting to wander down your stomach, until heâs cupping you over your shorts. âJust me, sweetheart.â
You moan, shaking your head. âThatâs so bad, De- Fuck-â
He smirks as his fingers slide under your shorts, and it falters for only a second as they find your bare pussy.Â
âYouâre not wearing any underwear.â He grunts, and you flush, turning your face into the pillow.
âLaundry day,â you mumble, and Dean chuckles.
âSure, baby-â
âIt is,â you twist to glare at him, and his grin just grows.
âI believe you,â he leans down, brushing his mouth right over yours, and you squeak as one finger trails between your pussy lips. âBut I also believe youâre always this wet for me. And sometimes,â his thumb presses right over your clit. âYouâd go bare and hope Iâd just pin you down and fuck you.â
You moan shamelessly, your eyes wide and trapped on Deanâs and his voice drops lower than youâve ever heard it.Â
âI think youâve touched yourself thinking of me, just like I touch myself thinking about you.â
Thereâs no chance to respond before his finger pushes inside of you, his thumb starting to rub slow circles around your pussy, and youâre flying. The only tether between the earth and pleasure, white-hot and perfect and teasing, is Deanâs voice, right in your ear.Â
âDream about your pretty mouth on my cock, babygirl. Or your hands, or being buried in the sweet pussy until youâre a perfect mess for me.â He chuckles, pressing a soft kiss to the corner of your mouth, and your nails dig into his back. âKinda like this, actually.â
âDe- Shit,â a second finger pushes in with the first, and heâs still moving them so slow. âFeels good, so good-â
âYeah, it does,â Dean groans, and your eyes flutter open to see him rutting against the mattress, his own face almost a mirror of your own desperation as he watches his fingers pump in and out of your cunt. âJesus, youâre so pretty-â
âDean.â You grab his face between your hands, and his eyes snap onto yours. âMore.â
He blinks at you for a second, but then gives you a tight nod.Â
His fingers crook inside of you, rubbing against that hot, spongey spot inside of you, and your mouth falls open in a silent scream. His thumb is gone from your clit, only giving it quick, frenzied flicks as youâre dragged right up to the edge, and he wonât look away from you-
Then heâs gone. Youâre dangling right on the edge of release, but Dean yanks his fingers away with a taunting grin, and a high, pathetic sound escapes your throat.Â
You start to grumble an incoherent protest, but it dies in your throat at the sight above you.Â
Heâs pushing your legs up to help you out of your shorts andâcompletely ruinedâunderwear. He kisses against your calf before tossing everything into a corner of the room, and shoves your knees back apart. Then the two fingers push back into your for only a second, long enough to pull another moan from your throat, and Dean settles back between your legs with a grin.
Then heâs gone again. And one hand grabs your chin to keep your eyes trapped on his as he brings his fingers up to his mouth.Â
Dean cleans his fingers of your arousal, his gaze never leaving yours, and a sound thatâs awfully like a moan rumbling through his chest.
âTaste better than I dreamed,â he mutters, and you shudder with pleasure as he goes back, dragging those same fingers back over your soaked core, dipping slightly into your cunt like heâs trying to gather as much as he can. âShit, I wouldâve let a witch get the jump on me years ago if I knew Iâd finally get to have this.â
You blink at him, your voice so soft and needy you almost donât recognize it. âYears?â
âUh, yeah.â Dean nods, a slight blush seeming to creep over his cheeks, even as his thumb starts to drag slow circles around your clit. âTold you, sweetheart, youâve been in since I saw you.â
âI- Why didnât you-â
He shrugs. âDidnât think youâd want it. Taste.â
You frown at him, opening your mouth to protestâyour mind doesnât seem to be able to wrap itself around not wanting Deanâbut the sound falls into a moan as his fingers press on your lower lip. Theyâre soaked in your wetness, and asking for further permission, and under Deanâs almost adoring gaze, you donât know how to do anything but grant it.
Dean groans as he pushes his fingers almost all the way down your throat, and you feel his still-clothed cock twitch against you when you start to suck.
âJesus,â he mutters, pulling back with another one of those moans. âYouâre so freakinâ perfect-â
âDean,â you whine, scratching at his chest and bucking your hips up to try and grind over his bulge, but he just grunts, dropping his full weight down to pin you against the mattress.
âNot yet, sweetheart.â
You shake your head, wiggling below him, and his eyes flutter shut.
âGod-â He moans your name as you manage to get your legs free, wrapping them around his waist and rolling your hips against his still hidden cock. âShit- Alright.â
Dean grabs you by your waist, and you yelp as he rolls you over without warning. Suddenly youâre straddling his bare chest as he pulls off his sweats, his gaze locked on yours the whole time. Then your shirt is being all but ripped off your body, and before you know whatâs happening, Deanâs got one hand on your ass and the other back on your jaw, hold your eyes down to his.
He mutters your name, and your fingers curl against his bare chest. âIâve got a condom in the side drawer-â
âIâm clean.â Your words are too quick, and his eyes flash. âAnd I- Iâm on birth control. If- If youâre- If you too-â
He laughs, his thumb tracing over your lower lip, and the sound rolls through his chest, vibrating against your pussy and making your mouth fall open.Â
âDonât hurt yourself, baby.â Deanâs hands drift to grab you by the waist, and he shifts below you, making sure heâs more leaning against the headboard than flat on his back. âHold on.â
His grip tightens, and a stupid, high sound leaves you as he picks you up and pushes you down onto his cock.
Heâs big. And thick. And youâre being filled up so good, already cockdrunk and a little out of your mind at the feel of him splitting your open and pressing on all the right spots, but heâs not moving. Deanâs just watching you with a wide, adoring gaze, grunting whenever you try to grind against him and hissing when you clench around him.
âI said,â he lands a light slap on your ass, his eyes narrowing on yours. âNot yet. Wanna feel you, baby. Weâre gonna stay just like this until youâre begging for it.â
You gape at him, every word coming up as only a gasp or whimper as you try to move again, and he hits your ass again, and Dean raises his brows.
âGood?â
You nod, leaning down to press your brow to his. âJust doesnât seem fair.â
He frowns. âFair- If you donât-â
âI like this.â You mumble, ghosting a kiss over his lips. âA lot. Love it.â
Dean grunts, dragging you down into a full, deep kiss that makes it almost impossible not to squirm against him.Â
âWhatâs not fair, then?â He hums against your lips, and now that he knows youâre good, he seems to be all back on teasing. âCâmon, baby, you can tell me-â
You shove his chest, and he laughs. He canât keep doing that. Itâs like a small vibrator against your clit, and heâs so handsome, and you donât know how to not clench around him. But all that gets you is another slap of your ass, and you might be starting to drip down your thighs and onto Deanâs.
���Asshole-â
He grabs your hand, pressing a kiss to your palm. âYou love it.â
You do. âNever shouldâve told you that,â you grumble, and he laughs again, and you might be on the brink of insanity.
âToo late. I know it now. Never gonna let you or this pretty pussy go neglected again, babygirl, so watch out.â
He pokes your side, grinning as you let out a squeaking giggle, but it quickly falls into a moan as his free hand moves up to play with your tits.Â
âDean-â
âI know,â he hums, flicking your nipple before leaning up to press a kiss over the hurt. âBut youâre doing so well for me, sweetheart. Being such a good girl.â
You moan against, and Dean smirks.
âYou like that, donât you. Like being my good girl-â
âDean.â You hiss, trying to grind against him, and whimpering at the next slap on your ass. âFuck, please-â
âThatâs closer.â He hums, resuming his movements on your tits. âBut you still have to tell me whatâs not fair.â
âItâs-â You take a shaking breath, trying to regather your thoughts. âItâs not important-â
âAnything you think is important.â He mutters, and you swallow at the intensity in his gaze. âTell me, baby. Then Iâll give you whatever you want.â
Fuck.Â
He canât lie.Â
And just from the expression on his face, you can almost feel how much he means it.Â
âItâs just, I-â You take a slow breath, watching him carefully. âWhat about you?â
Dean frowns. âWhat about me.â
âYou had, um- a lot of ideas.â You trace your fingers over his tattoo, trying to focus on your words instead of Deanâs cock, hard and pressed into you and making you almost burn with desire. âAnd I- I just donât want it to only be about me-â
Youâre cut off as Dean laughs again, your words falling into a high, gasping moan, and almost in a reward, Dean slams himself up to meet the rolls of your hips.Â
You still get a small spank for the movement.Â
Worth it.
Dean drawls your name, looking up at you like youâre the best thing heâs ever seen. âYou think having you sit on my cock under youâre begging me to fuck you is about you?â
You flush, shaking your head weakly, and he chuckles again.Â
You moan, fluttering around him, but this time the slap on your ass comes with Dean pinching your nipple, and slamming up until heâs hitting your cervix.
âTrust me, baby,â he grunts, squeezing your ass and tugging you back down into a long, slow kiss. âThis is all about me.â
âBut-â
âWeâre gonna do all of that shit later,â Dean pulls back, just enough to hold your gaze, and his arm wraps around your back, pinning you firmly down. âTrust me, babygirl, I mean it. Iâm gonna give you everything.â
âDean-â
âBut right now, I want you to come on my cock, and I want you to say please.â Something strange flashes over his expression, and his voice drops impossibly lower. âNeed to know you mean it, sweetheart.â
Oh.Â
Youâre not under a truth curse. And Dean is adorable and handsome and strong below you, but heâs still Dean.
And you can see it in his eyes.
Heâs still not sure you do mean it.Â
You have nothing to do but prove him wrong.
âDean.â You whisper, forcing your hips not to roll as you lean down, holding his gaze. âPlease. I want it. Want it so bad. I dream about you and touch myself thinking about you. Iâd let you do whatever you want to me, cause I love you and I need you, Dean. Iâm going to go insane if you donât fuck me, please.â
âSon of a bitch.â Dean mutters, his grip growing bruising on your hips. âFeel so good, baby, just need you to give me one more-â
âPlease-â
Your voice turns into a long, heavy moan as Dean rolls your hips along his cock, and the whole world lights up with good.
âGood girl,â he mutters, and you throw your head back as he helps you repeat the movement, every single nerve in your body glowing with Dean. âFuck yourself on my cock, sweetheart. Take what you need.â
There might be something teasing to his voice, but you canât really hear it. You canât really think of anything past the feeling of him inside you, or the low sounds that you keep pulling out of his chest as you grind down. Youâre riding Deanâs cock like your life depends on it, gasping his name whenever your clit rubs against his groin or his hips jerk, making him bump that sensitive spot deep inside of you.
And heâs a vision below you. Moaning your name and kneading at your ass, watching you move above him like heâs looking at all the stars in the sky. His lips are parted with heavy breathes, and one hand is drifting slowly up to the nape of your neck, squeezing slightly with his eyes wide on yours, and you tip your head back without a question.
Dean groans, his hand moving to grab your throat, and you move faster. Heâs not holding you that tight, but thereâs a possessiveness to his touch thatâs like fire up your spine, and you want him to leave a mark. Want everyone to know that heâs yours, and heâs touching you, and-
âFuck-â Dean grunts your name, his grip squeezing slightly, and you move faster. âShit- Sweetheart, youâre-â
His head throws back with a groan as you clench around him, chasing your release desperately, and you want him to come with you. You need him to. You need him to fill you up, to feel the burn of him in a week, to be so fucking ruined by him you canât even walk-
âDean,â you gasp, and his grip tightens even more. Stars are starting to dance behind your eyes. âSo close, feels so good-â
âI know,â he grunts, and you gasp as his hips rut up. âHold it, babygirl.â
You shake your head, grinding faster. âCanât- Need you-â
You whimper as Dean squeezes your throat, and his eyes flash. âCâmon, sweet girl, be good for me-â
âI- Dean-â
He grunts, and youâre not sure when the shift happened, but youâre not in charge anymore. Deanâs arm is wrapped around your waist, pinning you against his chest as he surges up, his hand moving to your jaw to hold it still. The kiss is deep and bruising and all spit and teeth, and heâs fucking you. Drilling up into your aching cunt without relent, kissing all over your face and down your neck, over the small marks his hand left. Moving back to your mouth as you start to shudder around him, scraping at his shoulders in a plea for release and moaning down your throat.Â
âGonna cum,â he groans, his pace growing uneven. âWhere-â
âIn. Inside. Dean, just- Fuck-â
You almost scream as his thumb moves back to your clit, leaving a featherlight touch thatâs somehow too much and not nearly enough.Â
âDean-â
âCum on my cock, baby.â He growls, pressing his thumb down so hard it lights a firework in your whole body, and you donât know how to do anything but listen.
Your orgasm hits your like a wildfire, sweeping through your whole body until your toes are curling and youâre slumped in Deanâs arms, and he meets you with one last, beautiful moan of your name and a slam of his hips home. Your fingers tangle in his hair as he fucks you through his release, making yours rise and crest once more, and when itâs done, everything feels sort of bright and dizzying. A high, cockdrunk giggle escapes your throat, and Dean groans.
âShit-â He mutters your name, and you realize youâd squeezed around him. âGoddamnit, that was-â
âYeah.â You whisper, curling further into his chest. âThanks.â
He chuckles, but it falls into another moan as you flutter around him once more. âAlright, thatâs enough of that.â
Deanâs breathing is ragged in your ear, and you keep your arms wrapped tight around him as he pulls out. You donât manage to stop your soft moan, feeling impossibly empty and raw from the absence of him, but itâs alright.
Heâs still here.Â
And now, heâs yours.Â
Dean presses a soft kiss to your brow, his words soft in your ear. âYou want me to clean you up, baby?â
You shake your head, pressing your face into the crook of his neck. âDonât wanna move.â
âWe made a mess-â
âLater.â
He chuckles, rubbing soothing circles on your back. âWhatever you say, sweetheart.â
You smile, and grab him a little tighter. âAre you still truth cursed?â
âCourse I am. Wasnât a sex curse, this is just a benefit-â
âShut up.â You tug on his hair, and all you get is a laugh in return.
You lean back, just enough to meet his eyes, and he canât have looked at you like this before. Like youâre his whole world, and heâd never want to ever be anywhere else but you.Â
You wouldâve seen it.Â
You hope you wouldâve.
âDid you mean it?â You whisper, and he frowns.Â
âMean what?â
âThat youâve loved me since we met?â
Deanâs jaw twitches, and he lets out a slow sigh. âIâve wanted you since we met. Didnât love you until a few months after. But it didnât take much.â
You raise your brows, and he rolls his eyes.Â
âYouâre really taking advantage of how that Iâm cursed, you know-â
âIt was first sight for me.â You whisper, and his mouth snaps shut. âYou saved me, then helped me stand up, and I felt like an idiot because I was in love with the stranger who just decapitated someone in front of me.â
Deanâs throat bobs. âYou still feel like an idiot?â
âYeah.â Itâs only fair youâre honest, if he has to be. âBut only because I spent years pretending, I didnât love you, and didnât get to have this.â
You lean down, pressing a soft kiss to Deanâs lip, and he lets out a soft sound that almost has you ready for round two.Â
âYou punched me.â He mutters, and you lean back with a curious expression.
âHuh?â
âThatâs when I fell in love with you.â He mutters, rubbing slow circles on the skin of your hips. âI was trying to teach you how to shoot, but youâd never held a gun so you were shit at it. And I already liked you, so I was, uh- Kinda being an asshole. Pushing you too hard. And I said somethinâ about you not being able to defend yourself, and you suckered me right in my fuckinâ jaw. Started shouting at me about how I was being a dick, but- Um-â Heâs blushing, giving you an almost sheepish expression. âDidnât hear a word you said. Think I was making heart eyes or something. Remember thinking Iâm either marrying you, or no one.â
You canât stop your wide, almost idiotic smile, but itâs worth it. Dean mirrors it right back, and his eyes flutter as your run your hand carefully through his hair.Â
âI love you.â You whisper. âAnd I can punch you again, if you want.â
He chuckles, shaking his head, and leaning up to pull you down into a long, slow kiss. And you can feel it, in this one. How he really has been as hungry for this as you have. Howâjust as you donât think you ever want to move from his lap, even if the rapture floods the world and the sky starts to fallâhe never plans to let you go.
âThat can be one of our later things,â he mutters, tracing his tongue over your lower lip. âRight now I just wanna sit with my girl.â
You beam, nipping at his tongue. âWho you love?â
âYeah.â He snorts, squeezing your ribs and grinning as you jump, almost falling over him with a whine. âWho I love.â
End Note: The Dean Winchester mind cannot comprehend that he is lovable (I am going to force that knowledge down his throat).
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#fluff#x reader#reader insert#romance#canon typical violence#jensen ackles#jensen ackles characters#dean winchester x you#dean winchester fanfiction#dean winchester#dean winchester x reader#supernatural#supernatural fanfiction#dean x reader#dean x you#dean fanfiction#love confessions#request#tooth rotting fluff#dean winchester smut#shameless smut#smut#requests#angst
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HEART OF THE OCEAN - GOJO SATORU
summary. Gojo Satoru was never meant to survive your song. You were never meant to fall for a human. But the ocean has never followed the rules.
word count. 17.2k (nnyeah)
content. mdni fem!siren!reader, pirate!gojo, slowburn, mutual pining, forbidden love, reader lowkey has daddy issues, fluff, pet names, making out, really inaccurate transformations from siren to human, smut, fingering, p in v, feral gojo, slight dacryphilia, pearl necklaces, aftercare, ANGST, violence, gore and blood, major character death (not too graphic tho), reincarnation
author's note. idk y'all i just wanted to write some angst
The ship rocked gently beneath a sky smeared with pink clouds and salt-kissed breeze. The sails are full, the air warm, the crew loud as ever. Shoko tosses a flask to Geto across the deck, slouching against the railing with her usual lazy grin. Nanami mutters to himself over the ration count, already annoyed and it wasnât even noon. Yuuji and Nobara are bickering again, locked in a heated knot-tying competition that neither of them are winning.
Gojo stood at the helm, one hand on the wheel, the other dragging along the edge of a map heâd practically memorized. His fingers paused over a spot heâd circled days ago, the charcoal mark smudged from how often heâd touched it.
"Been staring at that for hours, Satoru," Geto called out, an amused lilt in his voice. "You sure youâre not in love with that map?"
Gojo didnât glance up. "If it leads to what I think it does, I just might propose."
"Treasure, treasure, treasure," Nobara groaned. She climbs up onto a barrel, arms crossed. "You know thereâs more to life than gold, right?"
"I respectfully disagree," Nanami mumbles.
"I just hope we donât run into any sirens," Yuuji says, tossing a pebble into the sea, watching it plop uselessly into the waves.
That earned a collective scoff.
"Oh, not this again," Nobara rolled her eyes.
"Iâm serious!" Yuuji turned around, pointing his finger like he was telling a ghost story. "They sing to you and boomâyou're overboard. You donât even realize your legs stopped working âtil you're halfway down."
"Those are just stories," Nobara snaps. "Tales to keep dumb kids from getting too close to the water."
"But what if theyâre real?" Yuuji presses. "Like, really real. What if one of us hears singing and just jumps in without meaning toâ"
"I vote Megumi," Nobara cut in, grinning.
Megumi didnât even look up from the net he was mending. "Youâd drown before I would."
Shoko snorted. "That tracks."
Their laughter rolled like thunder, loud and light. But Gojoâs gaze slid back to the horizon, narrowing just slightly. The water was still. Too still. Then, a ripple. Subtle, but there.
He blinked. A shimmer caught his eyeâjust beneath the sunlit surface. Iridescent. Brief. Gone.
His fingers flex around the wheel. There it was again. That strange pull. A drumbeat deep in his chest. Familiar and foreign, like a memory from a dream he couldnât place.
He exhales. Mustâve been the fish.
"Alright," he says, snapping the map shut with one hand. "We drop anchor near that island before sundown. Weâll stay the night."
"Think the treasureâs buried there?" Geto asks, already reaching for the spyglass.
"No," Gojo replies, voice as easy as ever. "But Iâve got a good feeling."
He doesnât say more. Doesnât mention the ripple, or the flash of light beneath the water. Doesnât mention the song he swore he hears every now and then, just barely, rising from the sea.
-
The ship had long since gone quiet. Lanterns dimmed, voices hushed, footsteps replaced with the rhythmic creak of wood and the hush of waves licking the hull. The moon hung low, fat and silver, scattering a path of light across the water.
Gojo lay stretched across a barrel of rope, arms folded behind his head, eyes half-lidded but nowhere near sleep. The wind was calm. Almost too calm. He shouldâve been tiredâhell, he was tiredâbut something kept tugging at him from inside his chest. That same pull again. A gnawing curiosity. A whisper. And then he heard itâvoice. Not loud. Not calling. Just⌠singing.
Soft. Sweet. Smooth like honey and salt. The kind of sound that shouldn't exist out here. Not this far from civilization. Not on an unmarked island in the middle of nowhere.
He sat up slowly, blinking. The song wove through the air, light as seafoam, curling around him like mist. It didnât sound human. It sounded too perfect for that. But it didnât sound inhuman, either. It sounded like longing. What the hell?
He stood, quiet, careful not to wake the others. No one stirredânot even Geto, who usually slept with one eye open. Gojo climbed down the side of the ship, boots hitting sand with a soft thud. The island was still. The trees whispered, but there was no wind.
The voice carried again. Closer now. Just beyond the curve of the beach. He walked toward it, heart thumping hard. His mouth felt dry.
And thenâhe saw you.
You were seated on a wide rock near the shallows, bathed in moonlight. The surf curled gently around your feet. You glowed, in a way no human couldâskin kissed with shimmer, hair catching the light like strands of pearl. And you were singing. Not to the sky, not to the sea. To him.
Gojo froze. You looked up, still singing. His throat went dry. He blinked once. Twice. No way.
He pinched his own arm, hard. Ow.
Still there. Still singing.
His heart was thundering now. Not in fearâhe didnât know what this was. Enchantment? A dream? A warning? He couldnât tear his eyes away. Heâd seen beauty. But thisâthis was something else. Something ethereal. Something that didnât belong in a world full of men with swords and ships and thievery.
You smiled, just barely. And kept singing. To him.
You donât stop singing. If anything, your voice softens, curling like silk around his ribs as he takes a slow step forward. Then another. The moonlight halos around you and the wet sheen of your skin shimmers. Your fingers trail along the stone youâre perched on, just barely touching the water, like you're inviting him in without a single word.
Heâs never seen eyes like yours. Deep and endless, like the ocean. And theyâre looking right at him. He swallows hard.
â...What are you?â he whispers. Itâs not fear in his voice. Itâs awe.
You tilt your head. Your song slows, just a little. A single note hangs in the air, trembling like a secret.
His boots crunch the sand as he nears the edge of the water, close enough to see the shimmer of your scales beneath the surface. He doesnât stop walking. He should. But gods, he doesnât want to.
You lift your hand thenâslow, graceful, beckoning. Heâs close enough now to see the curve of your mouth, the glint of something glowing faintly at your throat. An amulet. Round. Ancient. The glow pulsing softly like a heartbeat.
You hum one final note, low and intimate, and it lingers in the air like perfume. Your voice disappears into the sound of the sea.
Gojo takes another step, so close now the tide laps at his ankles. His mouth parts like heâs going to say something again, ask what this is, who you are, why it feels like the ocean is calling his name through your lips. But all that comes out is âYouâre real.â And gods help him, he wants you to be.
The silence that follows is deafening. The sea seems to still around you. Even the breeze hesitates. He stands there, thigh-deep in the water now, eyes fixed on you like a man utterly enthralled. He doesnât blink. Doesnât breathe. You watch him with a soft smile curling your lipsâdangerously pretty, devastatingly calm.
Then, finally, you speak.
âWell,â you murmur, voice dipped in honey and seafoam. âTook you long enough.â Itâs like breaking a spellâand casting another one right after.
His breath hitches. That teasing lilt in your voice? It sparks something wild in his chest. His fingers twitch at his sides.
âWas beginning to think youâd never come closer,â you purr, tilting your head, letting your hair fall over one shoulder. It bares your chest completelyânot that you were hiding it.
Gojoâs breath catches. His handsâpreviously relaxed at his sidesâsuddenly twitch like he doesnât know what to do with them. His gaze darts away, toward the horizon, the water, anywhere but you. And yetâhe keeps sneaking glances. Quick. Desperate. Guilty.
You watch his throat work around a swallow. He shifts his weight. Drags a hand down his face. Tries very hard to look like heâs not flustered out of his goddamn mind.
He fails spectacularly.
You donât move. You donât need to. Just sit there, naked under the moonlight, letting him unravel quietly in front of you.
The silence stretches.
His mouth opens. Closes. For once, Gojo Satoru is speechless.
âYouââ he tries.
You blink slowly. Innocently. âMe?â The word rolls off your tongue like silk.
He swallows hard. âYouâre not afraid Iâllââ
âWhat?â You laugh, soft and rich. âTry to capture me? Drag me aboard your little ship and chain me like some prize?â
His eyes narrow, but there's a flicker of a grin tugging at his lips.
You lean forward, elbows resting on your tail, eyes gleaming. âTell me, sailor,â you whisper. âWhat would you even do with a creature like me?â
Heâs standing there like a man caught between heaven and hell. Every instinct in him is screaming this is a bad idea. But gods above, he wants to find out.
You watch him take another step. The water reaches his hips now, the fabric of his coat floating around him in soft ripples. Heâs soaked, hair damp, moonlight catching on the white strands like frost. But he doesnât seem to care. You donât move. You donât need to. Heâs the one crossing the sea for you.
âStill think youâre dreaming?â you ask, voice low, velvet-smooth. You rest your chin in your hand, gaze locked to his. There's a dangerous sort of curiosity behind those sea-deep eyesâlike youâre not just waiting for him, but testing him.
He lets out a breathless laugh, half-shaky. âWouldnât be the strangest dream Iâve had.â
Gojoâs throat bobs as he swallows. His hand lifts slowly, as if moving through water thick with molasses, hesitation and desire tangling in every breath he takes. You watch him with a smile, calm and inviting.
His fingers are just inches from your skin now. The curve of your jaw. The shimmer of your collarbone. One final confirmation that youâre real.
He pauses. âYou wonât disappear, will you?â he whispers.
âI could,â you say. âBut I wonât.â
He reaches. Slowly. And when the tips of his fingers brush your skinâjust barelyâyou donât flinch. You donât pull away. You lean in. A little. Just enough. Enough to make him ache.
Suddenly it isnât just his hand. Itâs his whole body straining forward, the pull of something ancient and dangerous and inevitable. You smell like salt and stormwinds, something sacred and wild, and when your skin meets his, warm and cool at onceâ
He exhales like heâs been holding his breath for centuries.
You smile. âNot a dream,â you murmur. âSorry, sailor.â
You feel it. The shift in the air, the quiet tremor in the waves. Your amulet pulses once, faintly, like it senses whatâs supposed to happen next. The ritual. The ending.
But you ignore it.
Because heâs still looking at you, cerulean eyes boring into yours like heâs never seen anything more divine.
For just a little longer, you want to be worshipped.
Your fingers move before you even think. Lightly, you drag one hand along his collarâsoft, teasing, feather-light. His breath stutters. You smile, letting your nails trail just barely down the line of his chest. He leans in without realizing it, gaze half-lidded, pupils blown wide.
âWhatâs the matter, sailor?â you whisper, voice melting like warm tidewater. âYou look like youâve forgotten how to breathe.â
His hands twitch at his sides. âKinda hard to remember⌠when you keep doing that.â
You laughâquiet, delighted. He doesnât even know what that is. The way your voice coils around his ribs, your touch singing along his skin. He doesnât know that every second he stays in your presence, heâs sinking.
Not just into the sea. But into you.
Your palm finds the side of his neck, thumb brushing just under his jaw. His heart races. You can feel it. It makes something hungry stir in your chestâbut beneath that hunger is something else. Something like want.
You lean in until your lips are just a breath from his ear. âItâs time, you know,â you murmur, voice so low itâs almost a song again. âIâm supposed to take you now.â
He doesnât pull away. He shivers.
ââŚTake me where?â
You smile, lips ghosting over his jaw. âTo the depths. The dark. Where all your kind eventually go when they trespass too far.â
Silence stretches, heavy, water-thick. He finally meets your gaze again. âThen why havenât you?â
Your smile fades. Not completelyâbut the edges tremble. Just slightly.
You trace the line of his collarbone, softer now. âBecause I donât want to. Not yet.â
And itâs true. You should have dragged him under the moment he stepped into the tide. But you canât bring yourself to. Not with him. Not when you still want to hear the way he laughs. Still want to feel the heat of his skin beneath your hands. Still want to be wanted.
So instead, you look at him like heâs something sacred. Like heâs the one youâd worship.
And softly, you say: âStay with me a little longer, sailor. Just a little while.â
Because even if the sea eventually takes him, you want him to be yours first.
He doesnât know who moves firstâhim or you. All he knows is that your face is suddenly closer. The moonlight curves along your cheekbone, your lashes, the tip of your nose. And then, your lips brush his. Featherlight. Barely there. But it undoes him.
He inhales sharply, like youâve stolen something from his chest. Like a breath, or maybe a part of his soul. It wasnât a real kissânot reallyâbut gods, it might as well have been. Because everything inside him lurches forward. He needs more. Needs to feel your warmth pressed to him, to find out what itâs like to drown in you.
But before he can pull you closerâbefore his hands can cup your face and drag you into the kind of kiss that ends menâyouâre already gone.
A teasing smile dances on your lips as you drift back, slow and languid, water curling around your waist.
âGoodnight, sailor,â you murmur and then you dip beneath the waves.
The moonlight ripples where you vanish, and for a moment, he sees itâjust the faintest shimmer of your tail, iridescent, unreal, slipping deeper and deeper into the dark.
He stays in the shallows, breath shallow, chest heaving. The sea laps at his thighs like itâs trying to tug him in after you. He doesnât even realize his hand is still outstretched, reaching for something thatâs already gone.
But now heâll search every shore, scan every ripple, chase every whisper of song.
Just for a glimpse of you.
Just for another chance.
-
The waters are quiet.
You sit curled within the shell of your chamber, arms wrapped around your tail, staring out the arched opening where light from the surface used to filter in. Now thereâs only dark. The soft glow of the seabed pulses around youâblue, green, violet. It reflects off the polished coral walls, dances across your skin like gentle ghosts. But you barely notice it.
Because all you can think about is him.
The sailor with sapphire eyes and a grin like sunlight. The one who didnât flinch when you touched him. The one whose heart beat so loud, you could still hear it ringing in your ears even now.
âStupid,â you mutter under your breath, sinking your chin to where your tail bends. âStupid, stupidââ
âYouâre not stupid,â comes a voice, soft and familiar.
You glance up to see your sister floating just outside the chamber, arms crossed, watching you with an arched brow.
You blink. âWere you listening?â
âI didnât need to. Your amuletâs been glowing for the past half hour like you swallowed a lanternfish. Whatâs going on?â
You try to play it off. âNothing. Just tired.â
She swims closer, unimpressed. âLiar. You only get like this when something really bad happens. Or really good.â
You sigh, letting yourself drift down a little, hair fanning around you like seaweed. âI⌠I met someone.â
That gets her attention.
âOh?â Her tone sharpens, cautious. âDown by the shore?â
You nod. âHe was on a ship. Docked just off the cove. I heard his voice before I saw him.â
âDid you sing?â
âOf course I did.â
âAnd?â
âI was supposed to take him under.â
Sheâs quiet for a moment. âBut you didnât.â
âNo.â
A long pause. Then: âWhy?â
You shake your head, frustrated. âI donât know. I shouldâve. It wouldâve been easy. He was right there. I touched him. He was already falling.â Your voice trails off. The memory of his warmth haunts your fingertips. âBut I didnât want to. I just⌠wanted to keep him for a little longer. Justâjust talk. Just see him.â
Your sister tilts her head. âYouâre not supposed to see them. Youâre supposed to lure them, enchant them, end them. Thatâs what we do.â
âI know.â
âThen why are you still thinking about him?â
You donât answer. Because you donât have one. All you know is that his laugh is stuck in your head. His breathless voice. The stunned way he looked at you when you kissed himâif you could even call it a kiss.
You press your hand to your chest, just above where your amulet hums. And softly, almost too quiet for even the sea to hear: âI donât think I want to forget him.â
Your sister doesnât speak for a long time. She just floats there, expression unreadable, eyes dark with something older than you can name. Then she drifts closer, gently reaches out to tuck a lock of hair behind your ear.
âWe wouldnât know this. We werenât born yet,â she says softly, âbut it wasnât always like this. The reefs used to glow. The caverns used to sing with color. Our kind would dance with dolphins, weave pearls through our hair, and the waters would hum beneath usâalive.â
You look up at her, startled by the sadness in her voice.
âIt was beautiful,â she says, almost to herself. âBefore they came.â
You know who she means. The humans. Greedy fingers always reaching for more.
âThey took everything. Our shells, our corals, our sacred stones. Even the bones of our dead. Called them artifacts. Called them treasure.â Her voice hardens. âThey donât see us. Only what we can give them. And they always want more.â
You want to argue, say heâs not like that, but the words tangle in your throat. She sees it. âYou think heâs different.â A statement, not a question.
âI donât know,â you whisper. âMaybe.â
âYou hope he is.â She shakes her head. âBut hope doesnât stop a shipâs hull from crushing the sea floor. Doesnât stop the spears. The nets. The hands that rip and take and never give back.â She floats away from you then, back toward the chamberâs edge.
âYou donât know what it means to lose your first home,â she says quietly. âTo watch the sea dim, to see your mother weep because the place she was born in no longer sings. You donât remember the day we buried our queen and humans tore open her grave two tides later.â
Your chest aches.
âThey donât love us. Not really. They love the idea of us. They love the lure. And theyâll take everything you are if you let them.â She turns back once, eyes sharp, but not unkind.
âSo whatever you think you feelâkill it. Before it kills you first.â Then sheâs gone.
And youâre left alone in the dim quiet of your chamber, the weight of her words settling like silt in your bones. But still, you think of him.
What if he is different?
-
The surface is calm tonight. Moonlight drapes across it like silk, soft and glowing.
You hover just beneath, eyes fixed on the ship above. On him.
Heâs standing there again. Alone, hands on the railing, silver hair catching the wind like sea foam. He doesnât know itâbut he calls to you. Every night. Not with his voice, no. But with something else.
A longing. A question. A pull in your chest you hate and crave at once.
You shouldnât have come back. You told yourself that night was a mistake. That you'd been foolish to linger. To touch him.
But here you are. Again.
The current shifts. You swim a little closer. Close enough to see the frustration in his face. The tension in his jaw. Heâs been looking for you. You know it.
Your fingers curl at your sides.
One more song and heâll follow. Thatâs how it works. You know the rules. Lure them. Seduce them. Pull them down. Return the treasures they stole with their lives.
But he didnât take anything. He only looked at you like you were the most beautiful thing heâd ever seen. And damn it all if that isnât the worst kind of theft.
You drift to the surface. Just your eyes above water now. Watching. Waiting.
He sighs, and his hand liftsâbrieflyâtoward the sea. Like he knows. Like he feels you here.
He doesnât call out. Not this time. He just walks to the same stretch of shore, boots sinking into the sand, cloak fluttering behind him. The moon is brighter tonight. Or maybe he just wants it to be.
He stares out at the water. âI know youâre there,â he says quietly.
Silence.
Then a ripple. A shimmer. And then you. Rising from the waves with water trailing down your arms like glass. Your hair clings to your skin, your eyes reflect the moonlight, and your expression? Playful. Curious. Maybe even⌠fond.
He steps forward. Doesnât dare blink.
âDid you miss me, sailor?â you ask.
His lips twitch. âStarting to think I dreamt you up.â
You tilt your head. âWould that be so bad?â
Heâs close now. Close enough to see the droplets on your lashes, the delicate gleam of scales at your shoulders, the curve of your smile. âI donât dream like this,â he murmurs.
You glide a little closer, arms resting on the rock, the moonlight catching on your skin and droplets of water that havenât quite dried. The sea rocks beneath you gently.
Gojoâs doing his best. Really.
But his eyes keep flicking downward and snapping back upâlike he's fighting a war with his own damn brain. He clears his throat, face a little pink. Then pinker.
Then finally: âUh⌠donât mermaids usually wear⌠like⌠shells? On their, yâknow. Their⌠uh.â He gestures vaguely in your direction, eyes avoiding your chest like itâs going to smite him.
You blink at him. Then smile. Not cruel. Not teasing. Just⌠amused. âShells?â
He shrugs helplessly, ears going red now. âYeah. You know. Like in the drawings? I thought it was a mermaid thing.â
You laughâquiet and genuinely delighted. Youâve never seen a human blush like this. Pink all across his cheeks, nose, even the tips of his ears.
You tilt your head. âYou think Iâd strap bits of broken clam to my chest for modesty?â
He makes a sound that might be a choke or a laugh. Youâre not sure.
You let your gaze drift up and down his face, watching how he refuses to meet your eyes for too long. Itâs charming, reallyâhow flustered he gets when you do absolutely nothing but exist.
âI never understood why humans found breasts so enticing,â you murmur, thoughtful now. âTheyâre just for feeding the younglings. We never bother covering them.â
Gojo covers his face with one hand.
You smile wider. âAnd yet youâre looking at me like Iâve committed a crime.â
âIâm not!â His voice jumps. âIâm not lookingâI meanâIâm trying not to.â
You hum, resting your chin on your arms. âYouâre adorable when youâre embarrassed.â You tilt your head at him, gaze soft, voice feather-light.
âIf itâs troubling you so much,â you say, letting your fingers lazily swirl the water, âI suppose I can do something about it.â You smile, watching his composure slip through his fingers like sand.
âWhat would you prefer, sailor? Shells? Seaweed?â You lean forward just slightly. âOr should I just stay like this and let you keep pretending not to look?â
Gojoâs mouth opens, but nothing comes out. Heâs blinking fast, flaming in the face now. âIâuhâwhateverââ he swallows hard, waves a hand uselessly between you and the horizon. âWhatever youâreâuhâcomfortable with.â
You laughâa soft, melodic thing that makes his chest ache.
He looks like he wants the sea to swallow him whole. His ears have gone from pink to red, and heâs clearly regretting everything that brought him to this moment.
You hum, lounging back a little. âYou really are sweet.â
He scrubs a hand through his hair, still pink to the tips of his ears, but now thereâs a lopsided grin tugging at his mouth. He reaches out again. Slower this time. Testing the moment. His fingers brush your cheek. Trail down your neck. Neither of you move.
âYouâre real.â
A ghost of a smile tugs at your lips. âYou say that like you still donât believe it.â
âMaybe Iâm afraid if I do, youâll vanish.â
You wade in closer, just enough that the sea brushes his boots, and he doesnât move back. âYou came back,â you murmur.
He shrugs one shoulder, eyes not leaving yours. âCouldnât stop thinking about you.â
You laugh softly. âA sailor with a soft heart. Thatâs new.â
âYouâre the one who sang to me.â
âI sing to many.â
He narrows his eyes. âDid you kiss them too?â
That catches you off guardâbut you recover quick, smile sharpening. âWould it matter if I did?â
He doesnât answer right away. But thereâs something darker flickering in his gaze now. Possessive. Curious. ââŚNo,â he lies.
You swim forward, water lapping at your waist. âYou donât even know my name.â
âI donât need it.â
âAnd what if I pull you under?â you ask, voice like silk and storm.
He smirks. âThen Iâll die with a smile.â
You blink. For a moment, youâre not sure if heâs joking. But he is. Mostly.
Stillâhis words land heavy. Make your throat tighten. âHumans donât speak like that,â you say.
âIâm not most humans.â
Silence stretches again. His eyes roam over you. Not in lustânot yetâbut in reverence. Like heâs trying to understand what you are. Why he isnât scared. Why he feels like heâs been waiting for you.
You reach for him thenânot to kiss. Just to touch. A gentle drag of your fingertips across his wrist. He doesnât flinch. He leans in.
âWhy are you here?â you ask, softly.
He looks at you like the answer should be obvious. âI think,â he says, âI was meant to find you.â
Your heart skips. The ocean pulls at your waist. Itâs almost time. But you stay a little longer. âYou should be careful, sailor,â you whisper. âSaying things like that. Youâll make me believe you.â
He watches you like he already does.
You donât notice the ripple. Not the soft shift in the waves behind you, not the gleam of eyes just beneath the surface. Youâre too caught up in him.
You tease him, you laugh. You reach out again, a touch light as foam across his skin. And this time, he leans into it.
You donât pull him under. Not yet.
You want more of this. The way he speaks. The way he looks at you. The way he doesnât flinch from you like the others do. You want to keep this, even if just a little longer.
But youâre not alone.
Far behind you, beneath a curtain of kelp and shadow, a shape floats. Still. Silent. Watching.
Your sisterâs eyes glint through the dark, catching every flicker of movement between you and the sailor.
She doesnât speak. She doesnât need to. She sees enough.
And when she finally sinks back into the depths, the water grows colder in her wake.
-
The moonlight hasnât even faded from the surface when you slip back beneath the waves.
Your pulse is still racing. Your cheeks are still warm. His voice still rings in your earsâteasing, amused, wanting. And stars, if he had leaned in just a little more, you mightâve let him kiss you.
You should feel shame. But all you feel is light.
Until the sea goes cold.
Thereâs a shift in the currentâsudden and sharpâand when you whirl around, sheâs there. Floating in the dark like a phantom. Your sister.
Her expression is unreadable, lips pressed into a thin line, dark hair fanning out around her shoulders like a halo of judgment. âSister,â she says, voice low and echoing. âDo you think we wouldnât notice?â
You open your mouthâbut nothing comes out.
She swims closer. âThe sailor,â she hisses. âYouâve met him more than once now. I saw you. I saw everything.â Her words slice into you like a harpoon.
âI wasnât going toââ
âYou werenât going to what?â she snaps. âPull him under? Take what belongs to our people? Do your duty?â
You flinch. âHeâs not like the othersââ
Her laugh is sharp, bitter. âThey never are. Until they are.â She grabs your wrist, not harshlyâbut firmly. âYouâre forgetting why we sing. Why our mother gave us this gift. We are not meant to love them. We are meant to protect whatâs left.â
You look away. But sheâs not done.
âYou think heâs blind? He knows what you are. Your tail, your voice, all of it.â
Your jaw tightens. âAnd yet heâs still here.â
She blinks. You keep going, voice sharp. âHeâs not afraid. He doesnât flinch. He treats me like Iâm more than just a creature in the water. Can you say the same about anyone else?â
Her eyes flash. âThatâs not the pointââ
âNo, youâre missing the point,â you snap. âIâm not dragging him under. Iâm not stealing from him. Iâm not using him. Iâm just⌠being with him.â Your voice drops to a whisper. âAnd maybe I want to be more than what weâve been taught to be. Maybe I want something for me.â
The silence that follows is heavy, the water still between you. But you donât regret saying it. Not this time.
Your sister says nothing for a long moment. The anger in her eyes dims, simmering into something quieter, wearier.
Finally, she sighs. âYou always were the stubborn one.â
You donât speak. Youâre still braced for more venom, more warnings. But instead, she moves closer, brushing her fingers against yours beneath the water. A small, wordless gesture of truce.
âI still donât trust him,â she murmurs. âBut I trust you. And if this is something real⌠I wonât stop you.â
Your chest tightens.
Then she adds, low and urgent, âBut we canât let Father know. You know what heâd do. To him, all humans are thieves.â
You nod, slowly. âI know.â
She meets your eyes, serious now. âThen be careful, sister. Whatever this is⌠keep it hidden. For both your sakes.â
And just like that, the warmth of her hand fades as she turns, slipping back into the dark sea, leaving you alone againâwith your heart, your secret, and the ache of wanting something that feels more dangerous than ever.
-
The tide laps gently at the shore, but you hear none of it. All you hear is his breath.
Heâs there again. Leaning against a crooked, barnacle-bitten post, sleeves rolled to his elbows, moonlight caught in the silver strands of his hair. He doesnât speak when you emerge. He just watches, as if heâs afraid too much sound might send you fleeing back into the sea.
Your arms fold loosely across your chest, and you regard him with cool eyes. âYouâre persistent.â
A smirk tugs at his lips. âOnly when I think itâs worth it.â
That stupid charm at your chest pulses again. You hate it. Almost.
You rise from the water just a little, arms shifting subtlyâand for the first time, he notices something different.
Draped lazily across your chest: a strand of seaweed, delicate and half-hearted, barely clinging to its job. Twined between itâtwo pearlescent shells, awkwardly fastened like a joke.
His gaze catches. Lingers. His brows lift in disbelief.
You blink at him, expression unreadable. Then slowlyâso slowlyâyou smile. âBetter?â
He lets out a disbelieving laugh, dragging a hand down his face. âYou did notââ
âI thought it might make you more comfortable,â you say, perfectly composed. âIsnât this how your kind prefers mermaids?â
âYouâre mocking me.â
You tilt your head. âAm I?â
Silence stretches between you, filled only by the sound of waves kissing the sand. He doesnât reach for you. Doesnât even step forward. But you can feel his eyesâsoft and searching, like heâs trying to read the parts of you youâre too afraid to say aloud.
Your gaze flicks toward the water. âThis is a bad idea.â
âI know.â
Your brows knit. âThen why are you here?â
He pauses, then slowly reaches into his coat. âTo give you this.â
He steps forwardânot too closeâand opens his palm.
A pendant. Sea glass, pale and smoothed by time, looped into a simple twine necklace. It glows faintly blue beneath the moonlight.
âI donât know if itâs good enough,â he says, voice low, âbut I thought⌠maybe youâd like something that wasnât stolen.â
Your heart jerks. You stare at it. Then at him. And for a moment, you canât breathe.
Thisâthis isnât what humans do. They come to take. Always. Treasures, songs, magic, you. But this one came to give. Something small. Something quiet. But his.
You take it with trembling fingers, brushing his palm as you do. Your voice is soft. âThank you.â
His smile is gentle. âDidnât know if youâd show.â
âI shouldnât have,â you murmur.
âBut you did.â
You pull back before it aches more. Let the waves touch your skin again.
âDonât follow me,â you sayânot unkindly, a soft warning.
He nods. Doesnât stop you. Just watches you go, watches the silver glint of the ocean close around you. Watches the glimmer of sea glass now hanging around your neck.
-
Thereâs a puddle of rum soaking into his map. Gojo doesnât notice.
Not when heâs got his chin in his hand, elbow propped up on the wooden table, and a downright dreamy expression on his face. His eyes are unfocused. His mouth is curved in a faraway smile. And he hasnât blinked in⌠a while.
âOkay, what is wrong with you?â Nobaraâs voice cuts through the cabin like a blade.
He doesnât react.
Yuji leans over the table and waves a hand in front of his captainâs face. âHellooo? Earth to Gojo?â
Still nothing.
Shoko groans and sips lazily from her flask. âHeâs doing that thing again.â
âWhat thing?â Megumi deadpans, though he already knows.
âThat thing where he zones out and grins like heâs in love.â Nanamiâs tone is dry as the open sea.
âBecause he is,â Geto mutters, arms crossed.
That gets Gojoâs attentionâhe blinks rapidly and jerks upright like heâs been caught with a dagger behind his back. âWhat? No. Iâm notâwhat do you mean in love? Iâm not in love. Youâre in love. Shut up.â
âYou literally didnât hear a single word of our battle plan,â Geto says.
âThere was a plan?â Gojo blinks again. âOh⌠crap.â
Nobara slaps the table. âSee?! Heâs bewitched.â
âBewitched,â Shoko echoes with a snort. âYouâve been reading Yujiâs ghost stories again, havenât you?â
Yuji raises his hands defensively. âTheyâre good stories!â
Gojo stands, brushing imaginary dust from his coat. âListen, listen. Iâm fine. Perfectly composed. Mentally sound. Fully focused.â
Megumi gives him a look. âYou just tried to drink ink thinking it was rum.â
Gojo looks at the bottle of ink in his handâthe one he's brought dangerously close to his mouth. âNot my fault the bottle looks the same.â
âYouâre seeing someone,â Nobara accuses.
Gojo doesnât even deny it this time. He just hums under his breath, dreamy-eyed as he watches the waves lap against the hull.
Shoko raises an eyebrow. âAnd who exactly is this mystery woman?â
âOh, you wouldnât believe me even if I told you,â he says, ever the smug bastard, but there's a wistful edge in his voice. Like heâs holding on to something delicate.
Yuji leans in. âIs she pretty?â
âSheâs⌠beyond.â Gojo exhales, like saying even that aloud is sacred. âShe makes the sea itself look dull.â
âUgh,â Nobara groans. âYou are so whipped. You donât even know her last name.â
âOr her name,â Megumi mutters.
Gojo only smiles. Because he doesnât know. Not really. You never gave it. Never offered. Only left behind shimmer and salt and the echo of your laugh in the breeze.
-
The sea is quiet tonight. Not still, but calmâthe kind of hush that makes it feel like the worldâs listening in.
You float easily beside the ship, water lapping gently against the hull. The sea glass he gave you hangs around your neck, cool and smooth, right beneath your amulet and shifting with every little ripple. You still donât understand why he gave it to you. Maybe he doesnât either.
Gojo leans against the railing above, chin resting on his forearms. Heâs not smiling, but he looks⌠content. Like just being here is enough for him.
"You never told me your name," he says.
His voice is quieter at night. Less show, more real. Heâs asked before, but not like this. Not like it actually matters.
You trail your fingers along the wood of the hull.
"Names carry weight," you murmur. "Especially mine."
He hums, like he gets it. "Then Iâll carry it carefully."
Itâs not a line. Just something simple and steady, like most things about him that surprise you.
You glance up at him. Moonlight catches in his white hair, makes him look more ghost than man. And stillâhe waits. Patient, like the sea.
You hesitate. Youâve kept it to yourself for so long it almost feels like giving it away would be losing something. But he gave first. Not a demand. Not a trick. A gift.
"Would you even use it?" you ask.
"Only when it matters," he says.
That earns the smallest flicker of a smile from you. Not that he sees it.
So you say it. Soft. Almost like youâre not sure you meant to. But he hears it.
He says it backâquiet, careful. Like he doesnât want to chip it, like itâs something that can bruise if heâs not gentle.
He doesnât look at you when he says it, but it sticks. Settles into the space between you like it belongs there.
"Can I come down?"
His voice drifts lazily over the railing, casual like he's asking to sit beside youânot throw himself into the ocean.
You glance up at him, raising a brow. "What, you planning to jump?"
There's a flicker in his eye. Something boyish and stupid and far too Satoru.
Something in your gut tightens. âDonât.â
But his smile tips, sharp and boyish. âToo late.â
Before you can make sense of itâbefore you can even moveâhe cannonballs.
You barely have time to curse before instinct takes over. You dart backward, tail slicing through the water as you throw yourself out of the drop zone. The splash hits like a small explosionâloud and ridiculous and completely him. Salt sprays across your face, cool and stinging, and you blink rapidly, water rushing past your ears.
He breaks the surface a moment later, coughing, laughing, looking wildly pleased with himself.
"You're insane," you sputter, treading a safe distance away. "You almost landed on me."
He slicks his hair back with both hands, grin still wide. âI knew youâd move.â
âYou hoped Iâd move.â
âSame thing,â he says easily, floating on his back now, arms stretched wide like he belongs here. Like the oceanâs always been waiting for him.
You stare at him. You should be mad. You should be furiousâhe scared the breath out of you, risked everything on a whim, shattered the calm of the night like it meant nothing.
But all that comes out is a laugh.
A real one. Unfiltered. It bubbles up from your chest before you can stop itâlight, surprised, almost giddy. You cover your mouth too late, shoulders shaking.
Gojo blinks. Then stares.
And slowly, that ridiculous grin fadesânot fully, but enough for something softer to settle in its place. Something honest.
âThat,â he says, voice quieter now, âis the most beautiful thing Iâve ever heard.â
You donât respond. You canât.
Because he says it like he means it. Like your laugh just rewired something in him. Like that soundâthe one you didnât even mean to giveâtouched a part of him no one else ever has.
You duck under the surface for a moment, just long enough to cool the flush spreading across your skin. When you rise again, heâs still watching you. Not smug. Not proud.
Just there. Floating in your world. Not asking for anything. Not running.
âI thought humans were supposed to take,â you say quietly, your voice barely above the lapping waves. âSteal. Want. Use.â
His brows lift just slightly, water beading on his lashes. âMaybe Iâm just bad at it.â
You shake your head. âNo. Youâre just⌠different.â
You donât know why you say it. But itâs true. Youâve known it for a while now.
Heâs not perfect. Heâs a little reckless, probably too brave for his own good, but he gives. Things that matter. His attention. His time. The necklace still hanging at your throat. Your laugh.
He blinks salt from his eyes, and when he speaks, itâs soft. âSo are you.â
You look at him for a long time, silence pulling between you like a tide.
You were supposed to drag him under. That was the plan. Lure, tempt, drown. Like youâve done before. Like you were made to do.
But now⌠all you want is to float beside him, just like this. For a little longer. Maybe forever.
Gojo floats a little closer. Heâs still grinning, but itâs softer now. Less playful, more⌠thoughtful. The kind of look he only gets when he forgets to be loud. When the walls slip and all thatâs left is the man underneathâtired, curious, dangerous, and kind.
His voice breaks the hush, low and deliberate. âCan I ask you something?â
You nod.
âWhy havenât you pulled me under yet?â
The question sinks like stone.
You donât answer at first. Not with words. Just look at himâreally lookâand see all the reasons you havenât. The way he watches you like youâre not a threat but a wonder. The way he gives without expecting. The way his voice softens around your name like itâs something sacred.
âI was supposed to,â you admit. âThe first time I saw you. You were an easy mark.â
He lets out a low breath, water curling around his fingers. âBut?â
You shake your head. âYou smiled at me. Like I was real. Like I wasnât just something to catch.â
His eyes flicker. Something shifts behind themâsomething too big to name.
You donât notice how close heâs gotten until your hands brush beneath the surface. Neither of you moves away.
You feel the pull of it now, subtle and steady. Not magic. Just you, drawn toward him like the tide.
âAre you gonna kiss me?â you ask, the words barely audible.
Gojo tilts his head. âI want to,â he says.
You blink. The breath in your lungs feels heavy, thick with the weight of everything this isnât supposed to be. You shouldnât let this happen. You shouldnât. But you nod.
And then he waits.
He waits while the space between you shrinks, while the water ripples with tension. He waits with his gaze fixed on you, patient, like this is the first thing heâs ever wanted badly enough not to rush.
You lean inâbarely. Enough to close half the distance.
He mirrors you.
Itâs slow. So slow. One inch, then another. Close enough now that your noses almost brush. Close enough to feel his breath against your lips, warm despite the chill of the ocean.
Your eyes flick to his. Thereâs no trick there. No hunger. Just want.
And when you close the gap, itâs not a crash. Itâs a pull.
The kiss is gentle, almost shy. Like youâre both afraid to break it. Like neither of you expected this to feel like something holy.
And thenâsomething cracks.
Maybe itâs the way you tilt your head just slightly, or the way his fingers lift from the water and find your jaw like itâs instinct. But the moment shifts, deepens.
He kisses you again, firmer this time.
His hand comes up to cradle your cheek, thumb skimming along your skin, warm and reverent. Your body leans into his before you can think to stop it, the sea curling around you both like itâs trying to pull you closer.
He exhales against your mouthâhalf a sigh, half a groanâlike heâs been holding this in for far too long.
And then he kisses you properly.
Deep. Slow. Like heâs learning you one breath at a time.
You feel his other hand slide along your side beneath the surface, barely touching, not pushingâjust there, steady, grounding. Your fingers curl around his wrist. Not to stop him. Just to feel him there.
You move closer to him, body pressed flush against him. The heat comes quiet, curling up your spine, pooling low. Not wild, not franticâjust consuming.
He pulls back just slightly, just to breatheâbut his forehead rests against yours, and his mouth still ghosts over yours like heâs not ready to let go.
Neither are you.
âWow,â he murmurs, voice hoarse. âThat wasâŚâ
âI know,â you whisper.
His thumb traces your cheek again, slower now. Youâre both breathing hard, but itâs not tension anymoreâitâs something else. Something softer.
He laughs, just a puff of breath against your mouth.
And then he leans in againânot a kiss, not quite. Just his nose brushing yours. His forehead still pressed to yours. Like he canât bear to be further away than this.
No more talking. Just warmth. His hands on you. Yours on him. Water cradling you both.
Like the sea finally made space for two.
-
The waters of your chamber are still. For once.
No humming currents. No idle song. Just the soft flicker of bioluminescent light playing across the curved walls of coral and stone. You hover near the ceiling, resting against a smooth shelf of shell, the sea-cushioned silence wrapping around you like a second skin.
The charm at your chest glows faintly. Steady. Unyielding.
It hasn't dimmed since your last meeting with him.
You close your fingers over itâtry to will it still.
A shadow passes the outer threshold. Then a ripple, soft and polite, before a familiar voice filters in: âForgive me, my lady. Your father has asked for you.â
You donât move right away. Just tilt your head slightly, slow and deliberate.
âDid he say what for?â
The palace stirs as you pass through.
You swim down the coral corridor with practiced grace, head held high, ignoring the way the other courtiers glance your wayâcurious, cautious, always whispering behind their hands.
The throne room opens like a cavernâhigh and echoing, walls pulsing with soft light from the sponges embedded in the stone. The court has gathered, a loose semicircle of officials and guards trailing the edges of the chamber.
And there he sits. Your father. Tall and silver-scaled, eyes like polished obsidian. He watches as you approach.
You stop a few lengths from the throne, posture poised.
âYou summoned me,â you say.
A pause. The room is quiet.
Then, his voice: âI did.â
He shifts on the throne, steepling his long fingers, scarred from past wars.
âThereâs been talk,â he says slowly, âof a ship lingering far too close to our waters.â
Your chest tightens.
He meets your eyes.
âAnd Iâve heard whispers,â he continues, voice sharper now, âthat its captain has not drowned.â
Your spine stays straight, but you feel the flicker of heat pulse at your chest. Not from fear. From that cursed charm. Still glowing. Still betraying you.
You school your features. âPlenty of ships pass through our waters. If theyâve not drowned, perhaps theyâve not been foolish.â
Your fatherâs gaze sharpens. âOr perhaps theyâve been warned.â
The airâno, the waterâtightens. Just slightly.
You donât flinch. âI wouldnât waste my song on men who pose no threat.â
A silence blooms after that. Heavy. Testing.
Then he leans forward, voice dropping low. âThere are rumors, child. A humanâa pirateâwhoâs seen you more than once. Who still lives.â
You say nothing.
His eyes narrow. âIf a human captain resists a sirenâs call, it invites suspicion. If a siren chooses not to callââ
He doesnât finish. He doesnât need to.
âI have not failed my duty,â you say, calm, cool, perfectly composed.
âBut you havenât fulfilled it, either,â he counters. âNot yet.â
Your jaw tightens. A flicker of motion at your sideâa ripple of your tail.
Your father leans back again, like heâs weighing something.
Then âYou have until the next moonrise. Handle it.â
He doesnât say what âitâ means. He doesnât have to.
-
Heâs already there when you emerge.
Heâs sprawled out on the sand like heâs got nowhere else to beâhands behind his head, boots kicked off, one knee bent lazily as he stares up at the sky. The sea breeze stirs his white hair, moonlight catching in the strands like glass.
When he hears the water shift, he turns his head and grins.
âTook you long enough,â he calls. âWas starting to think youâd moved on to prettier sailors.â
You roll your eyes, swimming closer. âYouâd be the last to believe someone prettier than you exists.â
His grin widens. âTrue. But flattery from a sea goddess? Iâll take it.â
You laugh. Light. Smooth. Just like always.
You even smile up at him, that soft little tilt heâs grown too fond of. It feels easyâalmost too easyâto slip back into it.
He starts walking. Slow, unhurried, straight into the sea.
The waves rush over his ankles, then knees, soaking his rolled-up trousers until the fabric clings to him. But he doesnât stop. Doesnât hesitate.
âMost men run from the sea,â you murmur, brow lifting.
He grins. âMost men donât get invited back.â
You let him come closer.
The water laps at his hips now, warm and slow between you. He stops just short of where you hoverâstill half-submerged, hair trailing like silk beneath the surface.
âSo,â he says lightly, âdo I pass the test?â
You hum. âThat depends.â
âOn?â
You tilt your head. âWhether you plan on drowning.â
He huffs a laugh, eyes flicking over your face, then down to your fingers curled lightly against the waterâs surface. The charm at your chest pulses faintly, soft as a heartbeat.
âI think,â he says, voice gentler now, âif I were going to drown⌠Iâd want it to be like this.â
And for a momentâjust oneâyou forget what you are. What he is.
You forget the crown in your blood, your fatherâs cold warning, the weight of your song.
Thereâs only him. Standing in the sea like he belongs there. Looking at you like you do.
You donât move.
Neither does he.
The water is still between youâwarm and golden in the fading light. His eyes hold yours like theyâre tethered, soft at the edges, full of something that makes your chest ache.
Thenâ
He flicks water at you.
You blink, stunned.
A single splash, right to your cheek.
Gojo grins. âYou were looking too serious.â
You sputter, flicking water right backâquick and sharp, right between his eyes.
He laughs. Loud, real, head tipping back as droplets catch on his lashes. âOh, is that how it is?â
You duck half-under the surface, sending a wave his way with a flick of your tail. He gasps, mock-betrayed, and retaliates with both handsâsplashes big enough to soak your hair again. The charm at your chest pulses with warmth, steady now, matching the laughter bubbling out of you.
Youâre not thinking of your father.
Not of the sea. Not even of what this could cost.
Just thisâthis moment.
Him. You. The light in his eyes. And the sound of your laughter rising above the waves.
The waves settle.
Laughter fades into the hush of the sea, and slowly, the two of you drift back toward the shoreâwater clinging to you like a second skin.
You lie on your back just where the sand meets the tide, the cool grains molding to your elbows. Gojo flops down beside you, chest rising and falling as he catches his breath, hair sticking out in damp tufts.
For a while, neither of you speak.
Just the sound of waves. Wind. The far-off cry of a gull.
Above, the sky stretches wide and black, scattered with stars.
And yet you canât enjoy it. Not fully. Not with your heart tight in your chest.
He turns his head lazily toward you, voice soft. âYou're quiet.â
You swallow. âIâm thinking.â
He hums, teasing lightly. âShould I be worried?â
But you donât laugh. You don't even smile.
And thatâs when he sits up a little, his brows drawing together as he watches you more closely.
âWhatâs wrong?â
You donât want to ruin this moment. You really donât. But the words come anyway, soft and shaking at the edges.
âYou shouldnât be here.â
The look on his face flickersâsurprise first, then something more unreadable. âYouâre serious.â
You nod slowly, arms curled around your tail. âYou donât understand what youâre stepping into. What I am. What this is.â
He doesnât interrupt. Just listens, quiet and still.
You keep your eyes down, watching your fingers press into the wet sand.
âI was supposed to lure you in,â you admit, barely above a whisper. âDraw you under. Thatâs what we do.â
Your voice trembles, and for the first time in a long time, you feel something unfamiliar tighten in your chest.
âBut then you gave me that necklace,â you continue. âAnd you didnât take anything in return. You just⌠smiled at me like I was someone.â
A shaky breath escapes you.
âAnd now I donât know how to stop this.â
Gojoâs face softensâbut he doesnât rush in. Doesnât try to fix it. Just lets you speak.
âI donât want you to get hurt,â you whisper, finally looking at him. âBut I thinkââ
You stop. Bite your lip.
âI think Iâm falling. For you,â you finish, so quietly youâre not sure he even hears it. âAnd I donât know what that means for either of us.â
He doesnât speak right away.
Just watches you.
Then, with that same gentle steadiness, he shifts closer, brushing the wet hair from your face with fingers that tremble just slightly.
âLet me stay. Just for now,â he says quietly. âJust⌠donât push me away.â
You blink, breath catching. You hesitate.
And then, slowly, you lean into him. Just enough that your shoulder brushes his. Just enough that you feel his warmth.
The tide laps gently at your fins. Above, the stars keep watching.
And below them, you let yourself fallâjust a little more.
You donât realize how close heâs gotten until the distance between you feels like nothing. Just breath and warmth.
Your fingers twitch where they rest in the sandâclose enough to his that the edges brush.
He doesnât move. So you do.
Slowly, you turn your hand, the tips of your fingers grazing the back of his. And when he still doesnât flinch, you let them slide higher, curling gently around his wrist.
You reach up with your other hand, brush his hair back from his face, and your fingers lingerâjust a moment longer than they should.
He exhales, slow. Careful. Like he's scared one wrong move will send you swimming off into the dark.
But you're not running. Not this time.
His hand lifts to your cheekâhesitating, then settling like itâs the most natural thing in the world. His thumb strokes the curve of your jaw, and you tilt into it, letting your eyes flutter shut.
Then his lips are on yours.
Not greedy. Not rushed. Just soft.
Like he wants to memorize the shape of you this way. The taste of salt on your lips. The quiet catch in your breath.
Your amulet pulses low and warm against your collarbone, steady as your heartbeat.
When the kiss deepens, itâs unspoken permission. His hand tangles in your hair, your fingers sliding up his chest, feeling the damp fabric clinging to skin.
It shouldnât happen.
But it is.
And godsâneither of you wants it to stop.
The kiss deepensâsoft to slow, slow to aching. Every brush of his mouth against yours says please donât send me away yet.
Your fingers trace the line of his jaw, then slide down his throat, feeling the heat under his skin. He exhales shakily when your hand flattens against his chest, just over his racing heart.
His own hands hesitate at first, like heâs not sure heâs allowed to want this much. But when you donât stop himâwhen you lean into his touch like itâs the only thing anchoring youâhe gives in.
One hand cradles your face, the other drifts down, tracing the edge of your ribs where skin meets the soft iridescence of your scales.
He pulls back just enough to whisper against your lips.
"If Iâm leaving, at least let me have this."
You open your eyes. Heâs looking at you like he already knows how this endsâand wants this moment anyway.
Your charm pulses onceâbright and warm between you.
You nod, barely.
And thatâs all he needs.
His hands grow bolder. Slower. Reverent. Like he wants to map every inch of you to memory. His lips trail down your neck, lingering at the curve of your shoulder, your collarbone. Your fingers thread into his damp hair, tugging just slightly, urging him closer.
He groans low against your skin. âTell me if you want me to stop.â
You shake your head, breathless. âDonât.â
The moonlight catches the water still clinging to your skin, to his. Everything feels soft. Dreamlike.
Your bodies press togetherâheat against heat, breath catching, mouths seeking. Itâs not rushed. Itâs intentional.
And when his hand grazes the edge of your hipâwhere scales shimmer under his palmâand you shift closer with a soft gasp, he kisses you like itâs the last time heâll ever get to.
Because maybe it is.
Your back arches under him, breath trembling. His mouth finds the center of your throat and lingers there, reverent, like he can feel your pulse answering his own.
Thenâ
âWait,â you whisper.
His head lifts instantly. Heâs off of you in a heartbeat, but still so close, lips parted, breath warm against your cheek. Hands hovering, eyes searching yours.
He doesnât ask why. He just waits. Because thatâs the kind of man he is.
You sit up slowly, water slipping off your skin, your tail coiled beneath you. You reach out, cup his face gently in both palms and then cover his eyes with one.
He stiffens, just for a second. But he trusts you.
Your amulet glows.
It begins softâjust a pulse, like a heartbeat. Then brighter. Warmer. It blooms across your collarbone, pulsing with something deeper than magic.
When you remove your hand from his eyes, they open slowly, blinking against the moonlight, the shimmer still lingering in the air.
And what he sees leaves him speechless.
Your tail is gone. And in its place thereâs a pair of legs.
Smooth and bare.
Skin kissed with salt and moonlight, knees curled delicately beneath you. Youâre still you, but softer. Closer. Changed.
For him.
His mouth parts slightly. Not in lust. In awe.
âGods,â he breathes.
You smile, just barely. âBetter?â
He swallows hard. âYou didnât have to.â
âI wanted to,â you say, quiet. âI want you.â
And thatâs it. Thatâs all he can take.
Heâs on you againâbut slower now. Like heâs been handed something fragile. His hands slide up your thighs, careful, reverent, like he canât believe youâre real. His mouth meets yours with heat, with hungerâbut still gentle. Still asking.
And this time, when you press your chest to his and pull him in with both hands, thereâs nothing between you.
Only skin. Only breath. Only wanting.
The glow at your throat flares againâhotter now. Brighter.
It pulses against your chest, steady at first. Then quicker.
Gojo pulls back just enough to look down at it, breathless, the tips of his fingers still ghosting along your skin. The glow matches the rhythm of your breathingâno, your arousal.
He laughs under his breath, something low and amazed, eyes wide as he watches the way your amulet throbs brighter each time his palm smooths over your skin. âIt responds to touch,â he murmurs, like heâs just discovered treasure. âTo you.â
His hand moves, slow and steadyâgliding up from your waist, fingers splaying across your ribs until they rest just beneath your breasts. His touch lingers.
And then, with a careful brush of his fingers, he nudges the coverings away. You shiverânot from cold, but from how he looks at you.
He doesnât rush. Just grazes his palm over one breast, watching the charm flare in response. His thumb circles over your nipple gently, and your breath catches. Your eyes flutter half-shut, hips shifting just slightly toward him.
âFascinating,â he murmurs.
You almost want to laughâexcept heâs looking at you like heâs in awe, like youâre the most beautiful thing heâs ever seen, and it makes your pulse skip.
His hand drifts down, fingers mapping the line of your hip. Over your thigh. Skin to skin, gliding slow.
And then lower.
He watches you the whole timeâeyes dark, steady, waiting for the moment your body reacts. His hand dips between your thighs, and the charm flares, sharp and brilliant and hot.
You gaspâeyes fluttering closed, hips tipping into his hand.
âGods,â he breathes. âThatâs incredible.â
His fingers tease, slow and deliberate, and you feel your thoughts unravel with every stroke. Every touch echoes in your coreâand in the gem at your chest, glowing like a heartbeat, wild and bright.
âIs thisâŚâ he leans closer, lips brushing your jaw, â...what you want?â
You can barely speakâbut you nod, eyes glazed, back arching toward him.
His fingers slip lower, parting you with reverence and care.
And thereâthere it is.
That first brush over your clit, light and exploratory, has your hips jerking and your lips parting in a soft gasp. The charm at your collar flares like itâs tethered to the aching beat between your legsâresponding with each subtle throb, each flutter of sensation.
âShit,â he whispers, mesmerized.
He strokes again, more deliberately nowâjust the pads of two fingers sliding through your slick, testing how wet you already are. The gem flashes again, and your head falls back with a breathless whimper. Your thighs twitch beneath his touch, eyes hazy as he watches you squirm. Thenâgently, carefullyâhe sinks a single finger inside.
The charm flares so bright it casts shadows along the shore.
Youâre impossibly warm around himâsoft, tight, slick with wantâand when he curls his finger just right, your body clenches, a pulse deep inside that matches the flickering of the charm exactly.
His breath catches. âYou feelâfuckâyou feel perfect.â
He moves slowly, drawing that finger out, then easing a second in with practiced patience. The stretch makes you moan, your hand flying to his arm like you need something to hold onto. He leans in, pressing a kiss to your temple.
âBreathe, angel. Youâre doing so good.â
The glow brightens with every pump of his fingers, every soft squelch of wet heat. The deeper he strokes, the harder your body respondsâhips rising into him, breath coming in short, desperate gasps.
And the amulet pulses in perfect rhythm with your cunt.
Throb. Glow. Throb. Glow. Throb.
âCanât believe this thingâs showing me everything youâre feeling,â he murmurs, lips brushing your jaw, your cheek, the shell of your ear. âYou like this? Like my fingers inside you?â
You nod frantically, unable to speakâyour body already trembling, on the edge.
And he feels it.
The way your walls start to flutter, how the glow grows unstableâflickering wildly now, close to bursting.
âLet go for me,â he whispers, dragging his thumb up to circle your clit just onceâsoft and perfect.
And you do.
You fall apart with a cry, back arching, thighs shaking, body clenching around his fingers as the charm explodes in a radiant wave of golden light.
He watches it allâspellbound.
Then leans in to kiss youâslow and deep and full of heat that says weâre not done yet.
He watches your cunt flutter around nothing, charm still flickering weakly at your throat like itâs trying to recover from what just happened. Youâre limp beneath him, chest rising and falling, skin shining with salt and moonlight.
âDidnât know you could sound that sweet,â he breathes, dragging his fingers up your thigh, smearing your slick along your skin like he wants to mark you with it. âMight lose my mind if you do that again.â
You try to say something backâsomething sharp, something teasingâbut all that comes out is a soft, shattered whimper.
He groans.
Low and ragged and wrecked.
His head drops for a second like heâs trying to collect himselfâbut you feel it. The tension in his body, the restraint snapping thin. He looks at you, eyes blown wide, lips parted.
And thenââFuck this.â
He shifts back onto his knees, still between your thighs, eyes raking over your glowing body as he tugs at his soaked shirt. The fabric sticks to his skin, but he doesnât care. Just wrestles it off and tosses it somewhere behind him, hair even messier now, chest rising fast.
You blink up at himâbare-chested now, sea-glossed skin kissed with salt and moonlight. He looks wild like this. Like he could devour you whole.
And still not have enough.
Then comes the beltâfingers fumbling, desperate. He mutters a curse, half-laughs through it, then undoes his pants, shoving them down with just as much frustration. You catch a glimpse of him, long and heavy and twitching with need.
He kicks the rest of it off and lowers himself over you again, your slick thighs pressing to his hips, the heat between you crackling.
And oh, the moan he lets out when your bare chest presses to his.
âThatâs better,â he whispers, forehead against yours, hips rocking once more, cock sliding between your folds. âSo much better.â
He looks down at the glow between your breasts, at the way your body responds to his bare skin like itâs craving it.
And he grins.
âThink your magic likes me.â
And then heâs back over youâfully bare, hot and heavy against your slick, glowing skin. âGods,â he murmurs. âYouâre unreal.â
You whine as he settles between your thighs, guiding himself to your entrance. His cock is thick, flushed, glistening with precum. The tip nudges at your foldsâhot, insistentâand your breath catches in your throat.
âYou can take it,â he murmurs, hand sliding up to cup your cheek. âAlready so wet for me.â
He starts to push in. Slow. So slow you feel every inch. Every stretch. Your back arches and your mouth parts in a silent gasp. He groans low in his throat, dropping his head to your shoulder as he sinks deeper.
âFuck, youâre tight,â he hisses.
Youâre trembling beneath himâclutching at his arms, moaning helplessly as he bottoms out.
And once heâs fully inside, he stills. Not out of mercy. But reverence.
âLook at you,â he whispers, pulling back just enough to see your face, the glow between your breasts starting to flare again. âAll stretched out just for me.â
He rocks into you once. Slow. Deep.
You mewl, legs instinctively trying to wrap around his waistâand the glow pulses brighter.
âGodsâlet me see how much you want it, sweetheart.â
He sets a rhythm thatâs deep and steady, hips rolling into yours with that perfect pressure that has you melting under him. One hand tangled in your hair, the other on your thigh, pushing it open further so he can fuck you deeper.
And he talks the whole time.
So sweet. So filthy.
âTaking me so good. So perfect inside.â âYou were made for this, werenât you? For me.â âLook at you. So needy, so pretty.â
Youâre babbling nowâhalf his name, half nonsense, your hands scrabbling at his back like you need to anchor yourself.
He watches the way your lips part, the way your lashes flutter.
You feel the stretch as he pushes in againâinch by inch, deliberateâlike heâs savoring the way you tremble beneath him.
âShitâtoo much?â he asks, voice tight, lips brushing yours.
You shake your head, a breathy moan breaking free.
âN-noâdonât stopâfuck, âToru!â
He groans, pressing his forehead to yours. His hands grip your hips like heâs anchoring himself there, holding you still as he sinks into the feeling of being completely surrounded by you.
âFeels so fucking good,â he whispers. âYouâyou feel so good.â
He pulls back just enough to thrust in againâslow, smooth, deepâand your body arches.
The sound you make is soft, helpless.
He does it again. And again.
Youâre gasping now, fingernails digging into his back, every roll of his hips sending sparks down your spine.
âYeah? That what you needed?â he murmurs against your throat. âWant me to fuck you slow like this, baby? Let you feel every inch?â
Your only answer is a broken moanâand he grins.
His rhythm stays steady. Deep. Each thrust has your body trembling, your cunt clenching so tight around him that he shudders.
His groans grow louder. He doesnât care if his crew wakes up from it. Canât even think about it now, not with the way you clench around him like that.
âGods, Iâm not gonna last,â he admits, voice hoarse. âNot when youâre like thisâtight little thing, crying under meâfuckââ
You try to speak, to beg for more, for faster, for anything, but your brainâs not working anymore. All you can do is cling to him, ride out the wave of pleasure crashing over and overâ
And he feels it.
Feels the way you start to shake, the way your breath hitches.
He grabs your hand, laces your fingers with his, and presses your arm into the sand beside your head.
âCome for me,â he whispers, voice softâalmost reverent now. âIâve got you. Iâm right here.â
His thrusts grow more desperateâless patient, more needâuntil your body tightens beneath him with a stuttering gasp and you fall apart all over again.
Your orgasm hits hard. A cry breaks from your throat, your body arching as you clench around himâpulsing, shaking, stars exploding behind your eyes.
Gojo groans as you comeâlow and rough and helpless.
âHoly shitâfuck, thatâs it, thatâs my girlââ
He thrusts once, twice more before pulling out and shooting his load all over your stomach and chest with a broken sound, his fist tight around his cock, hips twitching.
And then silence. Heavy breathing.
His lips brush your temple.
âStill with me?â he asks, voice hoarse but soft.
Youâre barely breathing.
Chest rising in little, uneven gasps, thighs trembling, your hand still tangled in his hair like you forgot how to let go.
Gojo doesnât move at first.
He just stays there, nose brushing your cheek, lips parted against your skin. You can feel the beat of his heart where his chest rests over yours, still racing.
He presses a kiss to your jaw.
Then another, to the corner of your mouth. His hand slips down to soothe the shake in your thighs, thumb grazing your hip.
âSorry,â he murmurs, voice thick. âYou okay?â
You nod, blinking dazedly, lips barely able to form the words.
He huffs a soft laugh, curling beside you, arm hooked under your head to ease you into his chest. Heâs warm. Still a little damp. Still naked. Still pressing soft kisses wherever he can reach.
You manage a breathless smile, curling closer. His hand trails down your spine, settling low on your back like he needs to keep touching you.
And for a while, thatâs all it is.
Touch. Breath. Silence.
Then âI should get you cleaned up,â he murmurs. âYouâve got sand in places sand was never meant to be.â
You laughâsoftly, tiredlyâand he grins like he just won something.
He shifts, kneeling between your legs, coaxing you to sit up. His hands are gentle, wiping away the mess, brushing the hair from your face, fingers lingering everywhere like he canât believe youâre real.
And when he wraps you in his discarded shirt, helps you back into the shallows to rinse off, he does it all like youâre something sacred.
Afterwards, heâs dressed againâbarely dry, shirt wrinkled and hair a mess, but somehow still glowing in that effortless, infuriating way. He settles next to you, arms folded behind his head, eyes on the stars.
You lie beside him in silence, your body still humming from everything he gave you. Everything you let him give you.
Then he says it, so simply, like it costs him nothing at all: âStay.â
You turn your head.
His eyes are closed, voice soft. âJust a little longer.â
You donât answer. You just stay.
You stay as the moon climbs higher, casting silver light across his face. You stay until his breathing evens out, until his eyes canât stay open any longer and until the smirk fades from his lips, replaced by something softer. Peaceful.
You reach out, brushing your fingers through his hair onceâjust once.
Then you rise, slow and silent, not daring to look back. The sand is cool beneath your feet as you cross to the waterâs edge. Each step feels heavier than the last.
When your toes meet the sea, you pause. Your hand lifts to your chest.
The amulet pulsesâsoft and bright.
One more step.
The glow flares as your legs shift, flesh transforming back into scaled fin, your body easing into the current like it belongs there.
You look back only once.
Heâs still there. Still asleep. Still smiling, just a little.
And then you sink beneath the surfaceâsilent, alone, and glowing like youâre breaking apart from the inside out.
-
The ocean is quiet today.
Too quiet.
No schools of fish flitting past your chambers. No kelp swaying with the currents. Even the water feels heavier somehow, like the weight of what you did has sunk into the sea itself.
You don't sleep that night. Not really.
You drift. You float.
You try not to think about his hands, his mouth, the way your charm glowed for him like it had never glowed before.
But the sea doesnât forget.
By morning, a summons arrives.
No explanation. Just a stiff nod from the attendant, eyes carefully averted, voice flat:
âYour father wants to see you.â
You already know what for.
Still, you school your face into something composed as you swim through the winding halls, past the guards who can barely meet your gaze. You feel the glimmer of your charm even nowâdulled, but not dark. Not completely.
Your father is waiting.
Throned, still, massive. His presence fills the chamber before his voice ever does.
âYou broke the law,â he says.
You lift your chin, but say nothing.
He risesâslowly, deliberatelyâand you feel the pressure of his disappointment before heâs even crossed the floor. âWith him. A human. You let him touch you.â His eyes narrow, ancient and sharp. âYou let him claim you.â
Your fingers twitch at your sides. Not in denial. Not even in shame. But in memory.
Because you remember the way Gojo held you like you were something to be worshipped, not stolen. Not claimed.
Still, you say nothing. And your silence seals it.
Your father exhales, slow. âThen you leave me no choice.â
His trident slams to the ocean floor with a crack that echoes through your bones.
âThere is only one thing left to sever the bond youâve created.â
Your breath stutters in your throat.
He looks down at you. âYou will return to the surface. And you will bring me his heart.â
You donât move. You donât speak.
His words hang heavy in the water, thick as blood.
Your heart thunders, but your voice is barely a whisper. ââŚNo.â
He narrows his eyes. âYou would defy me?â
âIâplease.â The word leaves you before you can stop it. Your hands rise, open in front of you. âYou donât understand. Heâs not like the others. He didnât take anythingâhe gave.â
âA trinket,â your father snaps. âA distraction.â
You shake your head. âIt wasnât just that.â
Silence follows. Deep. Crushing.
His eyes bore into you like the weight of the entire sea. But still, you try again.
âLet him go,â you whisper. âPlease. If I made a mistake, punish me. But donâtâdonât hurt him.â
Your father stares for a long, still moment. And then, he speaks again. Quietly this time.
âIf you cannot do it,â he says, âI have men who will.â
âNoââ you surge forward, falling to your knees before him. âPlease, Father. Iâll stay here. I wonât see him again. Iâll do whatever you ask, but donât send anyone after himâdonât kill him.â
Youâre shaking. You can feel it. The way your voice trembles. The way the charm around your neck flickers in protest.
But your father doesnât soften.
He looks down at youânot as his daughter, but as something lesser. A traitor. A disappointment.
âYou broke the laws that bind our kind. You let a human inside your mind, your body, your power.â He leans forward. âThis is not about love. This is about balance. And you have tipped it.â
You go quiet.
Because you know thenâheâs already made up his mind.
Gojo Satoru is as good as dead.
Unless you get to him first.
The moment you rise from the floor, ready to runâhe moves faster.
A wave of pressure slams down around you. Not painful, but impossible to push through. You twist, try to swim forward, but it holds you in place like invisible chains.
âI know you, daughter,â he says, voice colder now, more ancient. âI know what youâd do.â
Your eyes widen.
âDonât,â you breathe. âPleaseââ
âYou would betray your kingdom for one man,â he says. âI wonât let you.â
You surge forward, desperate, heart thudding so loud you swear he can hear it through the water. But the force field remains. Sealed. Final. âFather.â
He turns his back to you. His guards step in. âLock her in the coral chamber,â he commands.
âNo!â Your scream is swallowed by the sea. âPlease, donât do thisâheâll think I leftâheâll think I meant toââ
But your father doesnât look back. Not even once.
And as the guards grab your arms, drag you through the halls, you realize something far worse than being punished: Satoru will never see this coming.
-
The coral chamber is silent but for the soft hum of the magic holding it sealed. Itâs not a prison in the traditional senseâbut it might as well be. The walls pulse with a faint light, ancient enchantments woven into every inch of the reef.
And then a ripple. You spin, heart in your throat, and see her.
Your sister floats just outside the barrier, arms crossed, gaze sharp. âYou look like youâre going to pass out,â she says coolly. âDid you think you could hide it forever?â
You exhale shakily. âHe wasnât supposed to find out.â
âI told you,â she snaps, gliding closer, her face stern. âYou were reckless. You fell for a land-strider. You gave him your power. Do you have any idea what that means for us?â
âI didnât give him anything!â you hiss. âIt wasnât like that.â
Her silence is pointed.
You run a hand through your hair, frustrated, angry, terrified all at once. âHe wasnât like the others. He didnât want to take. He saw me.â
Her jaw tightens.
âAnd now heâs going to die for it,â you whisper, voice cracking. You reach the edge of the barrier, fingertips barely brushing the glowing wall. âPlease. Please, I need to warn him.â
She doesnât answer. You see it in her faceâthe doubt, the war sheâs fighting behind her eyes. âDo you love him?â she asks finally.
You hesitate. ââŚYes.â
Her features flicker, soften just a little. âYou know what our father will do to me if I help you.â
âI know. Iâm sorry,â you whisper. âBut if you donât, heâll never even see it coming. Heâll think I abandoned him.â
Silence stretches long between you. Then she breathes out through her nose. âYou always were the reckless one.â
And her hand reaches forward. The barrier parts, just a crack. âGo. Now.â
You grip her wrist before she can pull away completely. âI canât leave,â you say, voice trembling. âHeâll know. Heâll tighten the wards. But please. Just find him. Tell him I didnât abandon him. Tell him I tried.â
Your sister hesitates. ââŚI donât even know what he looks like.â
You give her the faintest smile. âTall. White hair. Blue eyes. Stupidly pretty. He waits near the tide line at night.â
Her lips twitch. âSounds irritating.â
âHe is,â you breathe out. âBut Iâhe matters.â
Another pause. And then she nods. âIâll find him.â
You watch her disappear into the deep. Youâre left with nothing but the steady pulse of the chamberâs magic and the wild pounding of your heart.
-
The tide laps gently against the rocks. Gojo sits near the edge, legs drawn up, his arms resting over his knees. The stars scatter across the surface like theyâre watching him wait.
He checks the horizon again. Still no sign of you.
Itâs the third night in a row.
His easy smile is gone now, replaced with a quiet furrow between his brows. âStarting to think I scared you off,â he mutters, trying to sound light. It falls flat.
Then a shimmer breaks the water. He jerks upright, hopeful.
But itâs not you. A different figure risesâeyes too familiar, but colder. Cautious.
His confusion lasts only a second. âYouâre not her.â
âNo,â she says. âIâm her sister.â She studies him, as if weighing whether heâs worth the risk she just took. âShe didnât leave because she wanted to,â she says. âOur father found out. He locked her away before she could warn you.â
Gojo goes still. The next beat of his heart is loud enough to drown out the sea.
âShe tried,â her sister adds, voice quiet. âShe begged.â
For a moment, he doesnât speak. Just stares out at the water, jaw tight, something in his chest twisting painfully. Then, slowlyâhe stands.
ââŚWhere is she?â Gojo takes a step toward the tide. âIâm going after her.â
She blinks. âAre you serious?â
His jaw is set. âYou just said sheâs locked away. Iâm not letting her sit there thinking I gave up on her.â
âOkay,â she huffs, flicking a bit of water off her wrist, âand how exactly do you plan to breathe underwater?â
He pauses.
ââŚMinor setback.â
âMinorââ She cuts herself off, dragging a hand down her face. âGods, she really would fall for someone like you.â
He flashes a grin. âThanks.â
âNot a compliment.â
But the smile fades quickly. âI mean it. I have to do something.â
She regards him for a moment. Heâs serious. Really serious. No smug teasing, no flirtationâjust that unshakable look in his eyes that tells her heâd throw himself into the ocean for you without hesitation.
âShe wanted to warn you,â she says more softly now. âShe tried. But our father⌠he knows. And if he catches you near our waters againâhe wonât show mercy.â
Gojoâs mouth tightens. âIâm not afraid of him.â
âThen be afraid for her.â
That silences him.
Your sister crosses her arms, not cruelâjust resigned. âThe only way you keep her safe now is by staying away.â
ââŚSo thatâs it?â he asks hoarsely. âI just go? Pretend it never happened?â
âNo,â she says, gentler now. âYou remember it. Every moment of it. So does she.â
A long silence passes.
Then Gojo turns back to the shore. Shoulders stiff. Jaw clenched. He doesnât look back when he walks away. But the ache he leaves in the sand stays long after the tide rolls in.
-
The ship creaks gently beneath their feet as the sails fill again with wind, the salt-stung breeze tugging at hair and loose shirts. Theyâve set course for somewhere else. Anywhere else.
Gojo stands at the helm, one hand gripping the wood so tightly his knuckles pale. The horizon is just blue and endless, but he keeps staring, like he expects something to rise out of it. Like heâs hoping to catch one last glimpse of what he left behind.
Behind him, Shoko lights a cigarette and leans against the rail. âHeâs been like that all morning.â
âMore like all week,â Nanami mutters.
âYuuji tried giving him an orange,â Nobara says, arms crossed. âDidnât work.â
Megumi doesnât say anything, but his eyes are fixed on Gojoâs back. He sees the way his captain keeps shifting like heâs restless. Like heâs waiting for the sea to give something back.
âDid something happen on shore?â Shoko asks finally.
Yuuji plops down on a crate nearby, chewing absently on a strip of dried mango. âDid mystery girl dump him or something?â
Gojo doesnât flinch. But his grip tightens. Slightly. Sharply. The tension in his shoulders is sudden and obviousâand enough for Shoko to groan under her breath and flick Yuuji on the back of the head. âYuuji.â
âSeriously?â Nobara scowls.
â...What?â Yuuji says, rubbing the spot. âI was joking!â
Megumi exhales slowly. âRead the room. Or boat.â
Gojo still hasnât said anything.
Nobara steps up beside him, quieter now. âYou donât have to tell us what happened.â
Gojoâs voice finally breaks through, low and flat, âI left her behind.â
Silence spreads like fog.
âI didnât want to,â he adds, almost like heâs trying to convince himself. âI had to.â
Shoko crosses her arms. âIs she in danger?â
He doesnât answer at first. Thenâbarely audibleââI don't know.â
And thatâs all he says. No one jokes after that. Not even Yuuji.
-
The silence in your chambers has been so loud lately, itâs almost a relief when the door bursts open. Your sister rushes in, breathless, hair wild from swimming too fast. âTheyâre moving.â
You blink, still half-curled on the smooth stone floor, tail tucked beneath you like you were trying to disappear into it.
Her voice is breathless. Urgent. âThe guardsâFatherâs menâtheyâre already close. Too close.â
Your heart stutters. âNo,â you whisper, sitting upright fast, tail shifting beneath you, trembling. âHeâhe promised me time.â
âHe never meant it,â she says, voice thin and breaking. âHe just wanted you calm. You know how he is.â
The charm at your neck pulses onceâweak and frightened. âHow close?â Your voice comes out barely audible.
She hesitates. That alone is answer enough. âClose enough that you might not make it in time,â she says. âIâm sorry.â
Your chest feels tight. Like the water around you is thickening, pressing in, suffocating. âI shouldâve gone sooner,â you murmur, guilt blooming like ink in your gut. âI shouldâve warned him.â
Your sister moves closer. âIf you leave nowâif you swim hardâmaybeâŚâ
You donât respond. Because maybe isnât good enough.
You move, slow at first, like your body is still catching up to what your mind already knowsâthen faster, faster, until youâre flying through the water, heart in your throat, pulse roaring in your ears.
Please, you think, over and over, please let me be wrong. Please let them be safe.
Because if you're notâif they arenâtâthen itâs already too late.
-
The ocean is too quiet. Not calmâquiet.
The kind of stillness that makes even seasoned sailors look over their shoulders.
Gojo leans against the railing, forearms braced, eyes fixed on the horizon like heâs trying to find something he canât name. His hairâs still damp from a morning swim he swore he wasnât waiting around for. Salt clings to his skin. But his charmâs gone dim.
Behind him, the crew stirs with a strange energy.
Shokoâs brow is furrowed as she peers into the distance through a spyglass. âFeels wrong,â she mutters.
âLike storm weather?â Yuuji asks, quieter now.
âNo,â Nanami says, voice low and firm. âWorse.â
Gojo turns finally, eyes narrowed just slightly. âHow long until weâre ready to move?â
âHalf hour, if the wind holds,â Megumi replies.
Gojo doesnât nod. Doesnât speak. Just looks out againâtoward nothingâand feels something tightening in his chest.
He doesnât say it out loud, but they can all tell:
Somethingâs coming.
The first jolt doesnât come from aboveâit comes from below. A violent lurch rocks the ship, enough to knock Megumi sideways and send a bucket skittering across the deck.
âWhat the hellâ?!â Shoko grabs the railing.
âSomething hit the hull,â Nanami barks, already moving.
But itâs not just one strike. The second comes harder. Something slams into the underside of the ship with a dull, sickening crack, the kind of force that splinters wood. The whole vessel groans in protest.
âBelow deck! Check for breach!â Geto shouts.
Gojo doesnât move. He knows what this is. Not a storm. Not sea creatures.
Thisâthis is retribution.
Another strike. This time from the sideâsomething sharp tearing into the boards just above the waterline. A wave sloshes over the deck.
âSomeoneâs attacking us,â Nobara shouts, already drawing her blade.
âNo ships in sight,â Shoko says, snapping the spyglass shut. âNo sails. Nothing.â
âBecause itâs not human,â Gojo says softly.
Everyone goes quiet. The water stills again. Only for a breath.
Thenâsomething breaches. A dark, jagged figure shoots up from the depths, slicing the surface like a living spear before diving back under. Sleek. Fast. Not quite human.
Thereâs a chorus of shouted commands, boots thundering across wood, hands grabbing ropes and weapons. But Gojo doesnât shout. He steps to the edge, staring down into the deep.
You promised him time. And he knows nowâyou never had it.
The first crash nearly knocks the mast loose. It hits lowâbeneath the waterline. A sickening jolt, wood shattering like ribs, sends barrels tumbling and sailors cursing.
âWhat the fuck was that?!â Nobara yells, grabbing onto the railing.
âSomethingâs under us!â Megumi shouts, already disappearing below deck.
Another impact. This oneâs higherânear the stern. It scrapes deep, long, like claws carving into the hull.
The crew scrambles, chaos erupting.
âPlug the breach!â Nanami orders, voice like iron even as water pours through the cracks. âWeâre taking on fastâ!â
Then silence. Not peace. Stillness. It only lasts a second.
And then something launches from the water. It isnât human. Slippery, scaled, and lean. Gills flaring. Hands like knives. A sea-creatureâno, a hunterâlands on the deck.
âStarboard!â Shoko shouts, throwing a harpoon from behind a barrel. It pierces straight through the creatureâs sideâsends it flailing back over the railing with a screech.
But more are coming. Dozens. Fingers claw the sides of the ship. Webbed hands. Serrated weapons. Shifting forms dart just under the surface, circling like sharks.
Geto kicks a supply crate toward Yuuji. âArm everyoneânow!â
Nobaraâs sword is slick with blood already. âIâll gut every last one of you scaled fuckers!â
Gojoâs still at the edge. Frozen. Not with fearâbut with a gut-deep knowing.
This isnât a random attack. This is a message. From the sea. From the ones whoâve taken you.
Another clawed hand slams onto the railing beside him. He reacts fastâkicks it off, blade out, breath heavy.
Behind him, Nanami grabs rope and starts tying barrels together. âIf we have to abandon shipââ
âWeâre not abandoning shit,â Gojo snaps, spinning around. âWe hold until we canât.â
But even as he says itâhis eyes flick toward the horizon. Still no sign of you. No soft laugh. No glowing charm.
Just the black, roiling sea.
The ship groansâloud, guttural, like itâs begging to stay afloat. Theyâre everywhere now. Climbing over the sides, pouring up from the sea. Not all of them fully formedâsome half-human, half-monstrous, with fins instead of feet, barbed tails slashing through the air. The deck is slick with seawater and blood, bodies scrambling between debris and weapons, screams barely heard over the crash of the waves.
âGet back!â Nobara snarls, kicking a writhing thing off the main mast ladder.
âToo many!â Geto yells. âWe wonât hold this!â
âI told you something felt wrong last night!â Shoko ducks under a spear, slices its wielderâs throat clean with a broken bottle. âWhere the hell is Gojo?!â
Then they see him. At the far end of the deck. Standing above the chaos, coat soaked and sticking to his skin, hair clinging to his forehead, hands trembling just enough to show heâs running on pure adrenaline. His bladeâs buried in one of the creaturesâbut he doesnât look back at it. Heâs looking at them. âGet to the rafts!â he shouts. âNow!â
âNoââ Yuuji tries to argue, but Gojoâs already throwing a crate across the deck, knocking one of the attackers away from a half-loosened life raft. âWeâre not leaving you!â
âJust go!â he shouts again, this time louderâeyes hard, desperate. âIâll keep them off you!â
One of the creatures lunges at him from behind. He ducks it. Spins. Stabs. Another comes from the side. He doesnât flinchâslams his elbow into its gills, kicks it back into the sea.
And when Geto opens his mouth to argue againâhe sees it.
Gojoâs not planning on coming with them. Not yet. This happened because of him. Heâs not letting anything happen to his crewâhis family.
Heâs buying them time. A distraction.
âMove!â Nanami grabs Yuuji by the collar, dragging him toward the rope ladders. âHe made his choiceâdonât waste it!â
The crew rushes to untie the rafts, each member fending off attacks as they scramble toward escape. The ship lurches againâone final groan from the keel, deep and ugly.
And through it all, Gojo fights. Face bloodied, body bruised from the impact of too many claws and spears. But he doesnât stop. He doesnât look away. He stays. Waiting. Hoping.
Because maybe youâll come. Maybe you know.
-
The water is far too calm.
Too still for what shouldâve been hereâshouts, battle cries, fire and fury. All thatâs left is quiet. A quiet so deep it feels wrong, like the ocean itself is holding its breath.
You break the surface, expecting chaos. Expecting the fight. But thereâs only ruin.
Pieces of the ship drift past youâshards of splintered wood, torn cloth fluttering uselessly. A piece of railing, a shattered crate. The scent of smoke still clings faintly in the air.
You swim further in. Your eyes are wide, darting. Searching. Where is he?
You donât realize you're whispering his name until your voice cracks.
The deeper you go, the worse it gets. A mast, snapped clean in two. Ropes hanging uselessly. No figures. No sound. Just wreckage.
And bloodâthin, diluted trails fading into the tide.
You pass the remains of a lifeboat. Empty.
Your stomach turns. Your hands tremble, barely keeping you above water now.
Your lips part, but no sound comes out. Just a hollow breath. The glow of your charm dims at your chestâflickering, like it, too, has begun to mourn. You turn slowly in the water.
And then you see it. A large, flat piece of the shipâs hullâstill afloat, barely. And on it, unmoving, soaked through, arm dangling off the sideâGojo.
Your breath catches violently in your throat. You freeze. For a second, you don't move. Your body forgets how. Your mind goes blank. Then youâre flying through the water, limbs cutting through it as fast as you can move. You reach him and heâs still there. Still whole. Stillâ
âSatoru,â you whisper, pulling yourself up onto the debris, crawling to him on shaking arms. âSatoruââ
His skin is cold. Salt-stung. Pale.
You donât know when you started shaking. Not from the cold, not from the sea.
From what rests in your arms.
You cradle him as best you can atop the broken hull, dragging his weight against you as your tail propels you toward shore. The waves are gentle nowâcruelly so, as if mocking what the sea just took.
His head slumps against your shoulder. His skin is ice. No breath. No movement.
And still you keep going. You drag him onto the sand, gasping, coughing. The glow at your chest is frantic nowâwild, erratic, pulsing like a heartbeat that doesn't belong to you anymore.
You drag him onto the sand, gasping, coughing. The glow at your chest is frantic nowâwild, erratic, pulsing like a heartbeat that doesn't belong to you anymore.
You barely feel the shift until itâs already happeningâmuscle pulling, fins splitting apart, the weight of your tail giving way to something softer. The cool press of sand meets your knees. Your calves. Your feet. Legs.
Breath shudders out of you. You clutch at the charm, still burning warm against your palm, as if itâs trying to hold you together. But all you can see is himâstill too still, too pale, the sea in his lungs and salt on his skin.
âPlease,â you whisper, your voice hoarse, your hands pressed against his chest. âPleaseââ You donât know who youâre begging. Him. The ocean. The gods. Anyone.
You press your forehead to his, still dripping, still trembling. Saltwater pools around his body. He doesnât move. Doesnât twitch. Doesnât breathe.
Heâs gone. You know it.
But you refuse.
âNo,â you breathe, louder this time, almost choking on it. âNoâI didnât come this far for you to leave me. You canâtâ,â your voice breaks. Your chest heaves.
You sit there for what feels like foreverâholding him, cradling his lifeless face, brushing damp white strands from his eyes.
âYou said you'd always find me,â you whisper. âEven if I was hiding beneath the sea.â
Silence answers.
And still you stay there, beside him, your charm glowing so desperately it hurts.
Until the sea turns quiet again. Until your tears dry with the wind. Until you're left with nothing but the weight of himâand the crushing ache of everything you didnât get to say.
Youâre not sure how long youâve sat there.
Long enough for the stars to shift overhead. Long enough for the tide to creep higher around your legs. Long enough to feel the weight of him turning cold in your arms. And still, you canât let go.
Your fingers slip to your charm. Itâs still glowing faintlyâsoft white, barely flickering, as if mourning with you. You donât know what youâre doing until itâs already in your palm, the knotted cord pooling there. Your voice is barely a whisper. âIâm sorry, Iâm soâso sorry.â
Heâs heavy in your arms. Too still. His lips are blue. His skin is cold. You donât realize youâre crying again until your tears hit his cheek.
Then you slip it around his neck, letting the charm settle over his chest, right where his heart should be beating.
The glow flickers. Soft. Faint. Thenâbright.
But itâs not white. Itâs blue. The deep, clear cerulean of his eyes. The kind of blue that once made you hesitate mid-sentence. The kind that lit up when he laughed. The kind that stared at you like you were the only thing in the world that mattered.
And then his body jerks. He spasms, and your hands fly to his shoulders just as he twists onto his side, choking, convulsing. He gaspsâwet and raw. Saltwater floods from his mouth, spilling over his lips. He coughs hard, body wracked with it, and you hold him through every shudder. âBreathe,â you whisper, your voice breaking. âPlease. Just breathe.â
Another violent cough. His fingers dig into the sand, weak and scrambling. His chest heaves. And finallyâfinallyâhe sucks in a breath. A real one. Itâs ragged. Fragile. But itâs there.
His eyelids flutter open slowly. His gaze is unfocused at firstâglassy, dazed. But then those eyes shift. Land on you. ââŚYou,â he croaks, hoarse. Barely a whisper.
Your heart cracks open. You lean over him, one hand cradling his cheek, the other smoothing wet hair back from his face. âI thought I lost you,â you whisper.
He doesnât speak. Just stares up at you like he doesnât quite believe it either. Like heâs still half between this world and the next.
âIâm here,â you say, softly. âIâm right here.â
And finally, his eyes flutter closed againânot unconscious, just overwhelmed. He lets out a weak breath and presses his forehead against your palm. And you sit there, holding him, while the waves keep rising.
You feel warmth slowly return to himâthe cold fading from his skin, replaced by the heat of life. Of him. Heâs curled against you on the sand, breathing shallow but steady, as the ocean hums quietly at your back. Neither of you speak for a long while.
Then, his fingers twitchâreach for yours. And when you lace them together, he holds on like youâre the only thing anchoring him to this world. ââŚYou saved me,â he says, voice rough.
You donât look at him. âYou shouldnât have been there.â
âI couldnât stay away.â Your throat tightens. He squeezes your hand, and when you finally meet his gaze, it steals the air right from your lungs. Heâs looking at you like youâre a miracle. Like heâs afraid to blink and lose you again.
âI thought you were gone,â you whisper. âI thought Iâd never see you again.â
âSame,â he breathes, giving you a half smileâsoft, tired. âBut apparently Iâm too pretty to die.â
You let out a shaky laugh. Then a tear slips down your cheek, and he catches it with his thumb. âNo more running,â he says. âNo more hiding.â
Your voice trembles. âTheyâll come after you.â
âThen let them.â His tone is quiet but sure. âLet them come. Iâm not leaving you.â
You barely have time to breathe before his hand is on your jaw, tilting your face toward his. He doesnât kiss you gently. He crashes into you, his hand cupping your jaw, pulling you in as his lips claim yours with raw, aching need. Thereâs no hesitation, no fear. Just everything heâs wanted to say and never had the words for.
You melt into him, fingers knotting in the fabric of his shirtâstill soaked, still clinging to him like your touch does now. The taste of salt lingers between your mouths, your breaths shared and stolen, again and again. He groans softly into your lips as you shift over him, your body fitting against his like you were always meant to. His handsâcalloused and warmâtrail down your back, over the ridges of your spine, holding you closer, closer.
When you pull back to breathe, you hover there, foreheads pressed together, your lips barely apart. âI missed you,â he whispers. âMore than I can explain.â
Your eyes flutter shut. âI never stopped thinking of you.â
Another kiss. Slower this time. Full of promise and pain and everything youâve both fought so hard to bury. His tongue slides against yoursâgentle, then greedy. And you let him have you, let him take all of it.
Because he came back. Because you saved him.
Because against every odd and warning, heâs still yours.
And youâre not letting go.
author's note. after almost A MONTH we're back gang. the PAIN i went thru before posting this- FUCK TUMBLR'S BLOCK LIMIT i had to delete an entire scene (but dw the full version will be on my ao3 soon)
please do not steal, modify, or translate my work.
#jujutsu kaisen#jujutsu gojo#jjk#jujutsu kaisen smut#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jujutsu kaisen x you#jjk satoru#jujutsu satoru#gojo jjk#jjk gojo#jjk x you#jjk smut#jjk x reader#jjk fanfic#gojo x you#gojo x reader#gojo x y/n#gojo satoru x you#satoru gojo x you#satoru gojo x reader#satoru gojo x y/n#gojo smut#satoru smut#satoru gojo smut#gojo satoru#satoru gojo#gojo angst#gojo satoru x reader#gojo satoru fluff#satoru x reader
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For some stupid reason, you thought letting your boyfriend fuck your best friend would be harmlessâa weirdly selfless gift, nothing more. But when it breaks something in you, Sunghoon starts playing dirtier than ever. He says he did it for you, but now he wonât let you forget who he belongs toâor who you belong to.
nsfw warnings: SMUT, voyeurism, dub-con elements, manipulation, possessiveness, jealousy, toxic dynamics, rough sex, kind of orgasm denial, creampie, breeding kink, degradation + praise, crying, angst, emotional aftermath, mention of infidelity (consensual), very toxic sunghoon, reader spirals, unhealthy coping, manhandling, makeup sex, light coercion vibes.
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You're sitting cross-legged on the bed, heart pounding as you say it. "I was just thinking...maybe you could sleep with her? Just once. She hasn't had good sex in a while andâwell, you're amazing. Who better than you, right?" There's a long, terrifying pause. Sunghoon doesn't even look up from where he's lazily scrolling through his phone. His face stays unreadable, but the way his thumb slows gives him away.
He finally speaks. Quiet. Calm. "Say that again."
You hesitate. "I just...want her to have good sex. And youâ" He puts his phone down.
"You want me," he says slowly, voice flat, "to fuck your best friend."
"Just once," you whisper. "It wouldn't mean anything. I trust youâ"
"I'm not a charity service, baby," he interrupts, tone dangerously low. "You think I'll fuck someone just because you feel bad she's not getting laid?"
You shrink a little under his stare, but he doesn't raise his voice. He doesn't need to. There's a different kind of heat in his eyes nowâdarker, colder. "I don't share," he says simply. "Not you. Not me."
His fingers hook your chin, making you meet his gaze. "She can find her own dick. Mine belongs to you."
Then, after a pause, he leans in, lips brushing your ear.
"But the fact you even asked..." he murmurs, voice dropping to a whisper, "means I'm not fucking you hard enough. You're not loving it enough, since you just wanna share me with some girl."
It was two days after you suggested it, two days after he'd shut it down. You thought the quiet way he dismissed it meant it was over.
But now he's randomly brought it up again and being weirdly open to it.
"So...does she like it rough?" Sunghoon asks casually, flipping through a glass of water like it's wine. "Or is she the pillow princess type?"
You freeze. "What?"
"Your best friend," he says smoothly, lifting his eyes to yours with an unreadable look. "You never told me what she's into."
"IâI don't know," you stammer, heart tripping. "She doesn't talk about that stuff much."
Sunghoon hums, standing from the kitchen stool and slowly walking toward you. You shift where you're sitting on the couch, suddenly unsure of everything.
"She's cute," he adds. "Not as pretty as you. But I get it now. You didn't just want her to have good sex. You wanted her to know what it's like with me."
You flinch, looking down. "That's notâ"
"You already told her, didn't you?"
Your mouth opens, then shuts.
"You did," he smirks. "Told her you'd let me fuck her. Made her all curious. She's probably been thinking about it nonstop."
He crouches in front of you now, brushing his fingers lightly up your thigh. "Are you thinking about it, baby?"
You blink, mouth dry. "I thought...you said you don't share."
"I don't," he murmurs, lips ghosting over your knee. "But you do. You offered me like a gift. So why wouldn't I enjoy it?"
Something sharp twists in your gut. You feel cold. Distant. You don't know whether you're imagining the heat in his voice or if he's really enjoying thisâplanning itâtaunting you.
"Are you jealous?" he whispers, tilting his head. "You can say no. We don't have to do it."
But now, if you say no, you'll look insecure. Possessive. Dramatic. And you'd already told her. You'd already told her.
You manage a smile. "No...I'm fine."
Sunghoon's lips curl. "Good."
But the way his hand slides up your leg, slow and possessive, tells you something elseâthis was never about your friend. This was about reminding you exactly who he belongs to. And what happens when you forget.
You genuinely didn't think it would happen. You honestly thought he'd back out, maybe he was just teasing you. But now you're sitting on the edge of the bed, dressed, tense, trying not to fall apart, while your best friend stands a few feet away looking unsure and nervous, arms crossed over her chest.
Sunghoon is the only one comfortable. He sits back on the bed, legs spread, shirt off, calm like he's about to conduct a goddamn seminar. "She's shy," he muses, eyes flicking over your friend. "Not like you."
You tense. "Hoon..."
He ignores the warning in your voice.
"You're such a slut for me, baby. Always dripping. Always begging." His voice is soft. Fond, even. "She's scared to even look at me. It's weird."
You glance at your friend. She's biting her lip, unsure, flushed. This was your idea. You told her it was okay. Encouraged it. So now you can't say anything.
Sunghoon's hand reaches out, coaxing her forward, and she goes, slow and hesitant. She settles between his legs as he leans back on his hands, watching her. You want to look away, but you can't.
You shouldn't be here.
But Sunghoon insisted. "Sit there," he'd said earlier, pointing to the chair across from the bed. "I want you to watch."
It was supposed to be just sex. It was supposed to be for her. But the moment she gaspsâreally gaspsâas he finally pushes inside her, you feel your stomach twist. She moans loud, thighs trembling around his hips, and Sunghoon just exhales through his nose, like he's savoring it.
"Shit," he mutters. "She's tight."
She nods helplessly, eyes fluttering shut, head falling back. It's too much for her, the way he movesâdeep, slow, dragging his cock against every sensitive spot until her breath comes out in choked, trembling cries. You can tell she's never been fucked like this. She sounds like she's about to cry. From how good it feels.
And that's when you realizeâhe's not even looking at her. His eyes are on you. The entire time.
His jaw tightens slightly as she clenches around him, his pace picking up just enough to make her sob. But his eyes don't leave your faceânot for a second.
And then you move. Just a little. Rising to stand. His voice cuts through the air like a blade.
"Don't you dare." You freeze.
"Sit. Back. Down." He says, punctuating every word with a thrust of his hips, shoving his cock into her sopping hole.
You sit.
His hips snap harder now, making her cry out again, and your heart is in your throat. This isn't for her. It never was. This is some form of punishment. A game.
He leans in, lips ghosting against your friend's ear as he whispers something low you can't hear. She nods weakly, breath hitching. And then he finally smilesâsharp, satisfied, dangerousâand murmurs your name without looking away.
"You wanted this, didn't you?"
Her fingers are trembling. Her moans are breathy and scattered like she doesn't know what to do with them.
Sunghoon has her knees spread wide, one hand around her thigh, the other pressing firm into her lower belly, right where she's most sensitive.
You're sitting there. Still and frozen. You don't even think you've blinked once. "You're doing so good," he murmursâgently, like he's never spoken to anyone else that way before. "Just breathe. You're almost there."
You hate how good he sounds at it. How practiced and sweet.
Her eyes squeeze shut. Then they openâand for one second, they meet yours across the room. She looks ashamed of how good it feels.
And that's when she breaks. She cries out as her body arches, a full-body shudder making her hips jolt in his hands. She grabs at his wrist, her breath hitching.
"Ohâoh my God!âSunghoon! Y/n!âthank you!"
It slips out, soft and breathless. Like she means it. Like you both just gave her some fucked up present. Sunghoon only hums, rubbing her through the aftershocks.
You can't breathe as you watch her pull her skirt up with shaking fingers. Avoiding your gaze completely.
You manage a smile when she glances your way. You nod, say something stupidâ"Want me to walk you out?"âand she declines, says she's okay. Grabs her keys with shaky hands and hurries out the door.
The second it closes, you walk into the kitchen with no direction. Open the fridge. Close it. Open a drawer. Shut it.
Sunghoon appears behind you a moment later. "Okay. You're gonna act like that now?"
You stiffen. "Like what?"
He scoffs. "You're mad."
You turn around with an empty glass in your hand just to avoid clenching your fists instead.
"I'm not mad."
"Really? So what is this then? Hm? You being weird and quiet and pissed for no reason?"
You shove past him.
He follows. "Don't do that, baby. Don't be fucking rude to me when this was your idea. You asked me to fuck her. You asked me to make her feel good."
"What? You expected me to give her bad sex?"
"You didn't have to enjoy it," you snap, voice cracking. "You could've at least pretended like it wasn't that good."
His jaw clenches, and thenâhe laughs. It's not amused. It's bitter. Sharp. "Enjoy it?"
You flinch at the way he repeats it.
"You think I fucking enjoyed it?"
You fold your arms across your chest, looking away, but he steps in. Closer. You feel the heat coming off his body before you even register his hand catching yours.
He grabs your wristâfirm, not roughâand drags your hand straight to the front of his sweats, pressing it hard against the thick, unrelenting bulge beneath the fabric.
Your breath stutters.
"Does this feel like I enjoyed it?"
His voice is low. Laced with frustration. A different kind of ache.
"You think I got off?" he hisses, pushing your palm harder into the shape of him. "I didn't. Not a fucking drop. You think I gave her what I give you? I couldn't."
Your hand twitches, but he holds it there.
"I was hard the entire time. Still am," he mutters, eyes locked on yours. "My balls fucking hurt."
And it does. You can feel itâhot and heavy, straining against the fabric. His dick is pulsing under your palm, like it's begging for a release that never came.
"I wanted you the entire time," he says. "You. You had me riled up before I even touched her."
You finally yank your hand back, like it burned you. Like you don't know what to do with it anymore.
He exhales sharply. "I should've told you it was a bad idea," he mutters. "But I didn't. And now we're both fucked up over it."
The silence after his words hangs heavy, your hand retreating like it betrayed you, but the ghost of that contact still lingers between you.
You don't say anything.
You can't.
Sunghoon's eyes stay locked on yoursâdark, stormy, searchingâand then he tilts his head, stepping in slowly like you're a skittish thing he's trying not to spook.
"You're not gonna touch me?" His voice is low and quiet, but there's something mocking under the softness. A cruel kind of pout.
He brushes the back of his fingers along your jaw, then dips his face down, nuzzling your cheek with the bridge of his nose, his breath fanning warm over your skin.
"Hm? After all that, you're just gonna stand there?" he whispers. "You're not gonna help me?"
You turn your face away, refusing to meet his eyes, but that only makes him more relentless. He grabs your hand again, gentler this time, but still firm and guides it down slowly. Over the front of his waistband. Beneath the elastic of his sweats.
You feel the heat of him first, the slickness from how long he's been leaking, and thenâhim. Thick. Rock-hard. Twitching.
He groans, quiet but guttural the moment your fingers wrap around him. His hips stutter forward like he couldn't help it even if he tried. "Fuck, baby..."
He rests his forehead against yours, eyes fluttering shut. "You feel what you do to me?" he breathes. "You think she got me like this?"
You're still frozen. But your handâyour traitorous, aching handâtightens around him just slightly, and the sound he makes is sinful. Starving. "Go ahead," he murmurs, kissing the corner of your mouth with maddening restraint. "Take it. Do whatever you want. Hurt me, make me beg, punish meâjust don't walk away."
Your hand stays wrapped around him, sticky and warm inside his sweats, but your expression sharpensâcold and unreadable now.
He said anything. So you truly act like it.
Without a word, you wrap your fingers tighter around the base of him, gripping hard enough to make his breath hitch.
Then you yank him forward by his dick. His body follows instantly, helpless to resist. He lets out a broken groan, stumbling after you like a man under spell. You march him toward the bedroom without looking back, ignoring the way his cock is tenting nowâangry and leaking.
The second you're in the room, you shove him. He falls back onto the bed with a laughâlow, wrecked, way too pleased. "Fuck yeah, baby," he groans, spreading his thighs as you crawl over him, pinning him down with nothing but your stare. "You gonna fuck me on the same bed I just made your best friend cum all over?"
The words sting. Your stomach twists. You hesitate for half a second. Then your hand flies to his jaw. "Shut the fuck up."
He grins like he lives for this, almost like he's wanted this version of you all along. You straddle him fully now, grinding down, not to tease him, but to use him. His hands grip your thighs, but you slap them away.
"Don't touch me unless I tell you to," you hiss, voice trembling with anger you can't hide anymore.
"Yes, ma'am," he breathes, absolutely wrecked. "Whatever you want." But he's smiling, smirking even, like he already knows you're not really in control. Like he's just playing along.
And you don't realize it until it's too late.
Because the second you sink down onto himâtight, slow, making sure he feels every inch of how much he missedâhis hands fly back to your hips. Gripping. Holding. Locking you in place.
"Oh, fuck," he groans, eyes fluttering shut like he's seeing god. You brace your palms on his chest, ready to ride him into the mattress, to take from him like he said you could but then his hips buck up hard. In one thrust, deep and mean.
You gasp, nails digging into his skin, but before you can protest, he's already doing it againârolling his hips in slow, punishing strokes that reach everywhere.
You try to ride him like your pride depends on it, hips snapping forward, teeth clenched, trying to stay in control even as he grips your waist tighter with every thrust from below. It's filthy. Loud. Desperate. You try to slap his chest to get him to stop, but he catches your wrist mid-swing, pinning it behind you as he sits up, wrapping his other arm around your waist.
But the second you start clenching around himâtight, flutteringâhe loses it.
"Fuckâfuck, babyâgonna cumâ" he growls, burying his face in your chest, almost motorboating as his whole body tenses beneath you.
You feel the heat of itâhis cock twitching deep inside, thick spurts filling you as he moans into your skin. His arms tremble, back arching, and for a second, you think it's over.
That you won. But before your brain can even catch up, he flips youâmanhandles youâonto your stomach like your body weighs nothing. You gasp into the sheets, dazed, already overstimulated.
He doesn't even give you a second to adjust. Because he's still hard.
"Hoonieâ" you pant, twisting under him.
"Did you think I was finished?" he hisses, lining himself up again, one hand braced on the bed beside your head. "You really thought one round was enough for that fucking stunt you pulled?"
He thrusts in again, harder this time.
You scream into the pillow, legs shaking as his pace turns punishing.
"You'll never offer me to anyone again," he growls, breath hot in your ear. "Not after I'm done with you. You hear me?"
You can't even answer. You're falling apart beneath him.
"Say it," he demands, slamming into you again. "Tell me whose dick this is."
"M-Mine!" you cry out, voice muffled. "It's mine, only mineâ!"
"That's right," he snarls, slapping your ass before gripping your hip again, deep and brutal. "Yours. Always."
ââââââââââââââââââââââââââââ
⢠a/n: where did this even come from?đ this is kind of like a glimpse of what goes on in my head cause i love toxic relationship dramađ¤§
#enhypen smut#enhypen angst#enhypen x reader#enha smut#enha angst#enha hard thoughts#enha hard hours#sunghoon x reader#sunghoon smut#sunghoon angst#sunghoon hard thoughts#sunghoon hard hours
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SICK AS A DOG!
summary: spencer comes home to his girlfriend being... well, sick as a dog. pairing: spencer reid x gf!reader. tags: afab reader, no use of y/n, pre-established relationship, just a bunch of comfort and cuteness because i don't write enough fluff
You were stubborn, determined, focused. Everything you did was done until it killed you. There was nothing that knocked you off your game. It was one of the things Spencer admired about you. Nothing made you stumble or stop. Not even the hundred and two degree fever that was weighing down on you like a sack of bricks.Â
Heâd been away from home for a week now on a case, speaking with you in the small gaps of time he had between work and the minimal amount of sleep he was getting. The updates had been normal, talking about how your coffee tasted that morning or your loud neighbors, until that morning. As soon as he had landed, heâd received your text.
Feel like shit. Will meet you at your apartment. Quieter there.
While it seemed like a nonchalant text, heâd immediately known something was wrong. In the couple of years the both of you had been in a relationship, youâve never admitted sickness. Even when you had a low fever, even when a cold had your voice sounding raspy and raw, you just stated that you were under the weather and moved on.
Spencer had left for his apartment straight from the airport with nothing more than a wave and a comment about needing to get home, picking up a few things from the drugstore and a Tupperware of soup along the way. It would no doubt be a struggle to get you to eat, hydrate, take painkillers or do anything, but that didnât mean he couldnât try. Slowly stepping through the doorway into his apartment, the first thing he notices is how dark it is. Usually, you found joy in turning on the multiple lamps and lowlights settled through the mess of his apartment, allowing the warm light to cascade across the phthalo walls and his mahogany and walnut furniture. While you shared his distaste for big, bright lights, you also despised how much he tended to brood in the darkness.Â
His eyes scan across his apartment, taking it all in. Everything, from the makeshift office to the messy living room, seems untouched. No candle lit on any of the tables, no returned book laying on his kitchen island, not even an attempt at cleaning up. If it wasnât for the car keys abandoned on the desk closest to the door, hidden among his things, he would think that you hadnât arrived yet.
Setting aside his go-bag and his satchel, he empties his hands before flicking on a few of the lamps. He steps around his couch to get to the ajar door of his bedroom, opening it slowly with a soft rap of his knuckles against the doorframe and a murmur of your name.
The response you give him is a hazy groan, laying curled up on his green duvet, the blankets kicked to the end of the mattress. Once the light streaming from the living room hits you, his brow furrows. Your body is hidden in one of his hoodies, oversized on him and drowning you, the hood pulled over your head and concealing all of your features.
âYou okay?â Spencer murmurs as he discards his shoes and tie onto the floor haphazardly, crawling into bed behind you. A slender hand cups your elbow before he pulls back slightly, shocked by the heat radiating through the thick fabric. âSweetheart, youâre burning up.â
As soon as heâs laid behind you, you turn around, legs pushing through to press your feet against his calves. Leaning your forehead against his chest, you seek out warmth even despite the fever overtaking your body. âOne hundred and two degrees,â you mumble through your haze, trying to cut out any questions he may have and minimize the amount of energy you had to use.
Frowning, his hand slides beneath his hoodie, pushing it up and exposing your skin to the cold air. At your soft mewl of discontent, he shushes you gently, large hand smoothing over your stomach. âI know, honey, but this hoodie isnât helping. Can you take it off, please? I can get you a shirt, if you want.â
âNo. Canât take it off. Canât move.â Your tone is slurred, voice muffled by the material of his button-up, fingers curling to fist his shirt and keep him there. âJust wanna sleep.â
To your dismay, he simply shakes his head, one hand untangling yours from the material before he sits up. Another large hand slides behind your neck, fingertips pressing into the sides as he slowly lifts you to a good-enough sitting position. âCome on. Hands up, please.âÂ
Your movement is slow, his hands pushing up the hoodie higher and higher and coaxing your arms to straighten so he could pull it off. Despite your fever, he can feel the goosebumps sprouting on your skin, rubbing them away with his palm as his other hand tosses the hoodie away. Placing a kiss to your forehead and fighting a grimace at the heat, he slowly brings you to lay down again. âIâm gonna go get you some painkillers and some water. We need to break your fever.â
That pulls a whine from your throat, reaching out and brushing your hand along his thigh as you try to find any way to pull him back down. âPlease just come back. We can worry about that later.â
Spencerâs heart thuds a bit harder against his chest at the request, never wanting to be the one saying no to you. But he knows the science, both biological and psychological, behind sickness behavior. Autonomic and behavioral changes triggered by soluble proteins produced at sites of infection. Lethargy, sleepiness, confusion. The body releases cytokines that affect moods and lead to a desire for social connection, hence the need to cling to him.
With another soft hush, he smooths down your hair and places another kiss to your hairline before stepping away from you. Moving quickly to keep himself from giving in and crawling back into bed with you, he heads back into the living room and fills a glass of water, making sure it was cold enough to feel nice but not cold enough to not drink quickly. Last but not least, he grabs a clean rag from off the counter, running it underneath cold water and ringing it out until it was just damp.
By the time he gets back to the bedroom, youâve pulled the duvet over your legs again, letting it cool your calves as your hands tuck beneath your cheek. He stands in the doorway, watching you fondly and admiring just how small you look in the bed that his feet hang off of. For a moment, he thinks about how heâd love to do this for the rest of his life. Have his apartment be the home you crawl to when youâre not feeling your best, be the person your subconscious deems safe when itâs at its most vulnerable.Â
Only once his arms ache from holding the water for too long, Spencer returns to your side, hand cupping the back of your neck to lift you up again. âTake the pills and a couple sips, sweet girl, and then you can go to bed, okay?â He murmurs as he holds out his hand, two white pills balanced in the middle of his palm.
Your nose wrinkles in distaste, eyes glancing at him pleadingly as you hope he changes his mind, only to be met with a soft yet stern gaze. Letting out a deep sigh, you pluck the painkillers from his hand and place them in your mouth before taking the glass he holds out, letting the cool water soothe your throat and the heat of your face.
After a few gulps, he plucks the glass from your hands, setting it on the side table and swapping it out for the cool rag. Leaning his back against the headboard, he pulls your head to lay on his chest, draping the towel over your forehead and ignoring the chill when one corner drapes onto his neck. Fingers work delicately to smooth loose strands of hair away from your forehead and cheeks before working through it, lips pulling down at the corners when they get stuck in a knot.Â
âThank you for taking care of me,â you murmur into the fabric of his shirt. âI know youâre probably tired from your flight.â
The sound is so soft that he barely picks it up, although he lets out a gentle hum in response. âI donât feel as bad as you, thatâs for sure,â he teases. His lips find your hairline again, breath brushing against your skin as he keeps his mouth there. âSocial and emotional support is scientifically shown to be beneficial towards an individualâs health. Support encourages health behaviors, such as consuming more fruits and vegetables and the ceasing of certain sickness behaviors, like mood changes.â
That pulls a soft laugh out of you, shuddering from a chill. âI think it should be a crime for you to talk all scientifically and sexually to me when you canât even kiss me,â you grumble playfully.
Spencer scoffs from beneath you, the arm wrapped around your shoulder tilting your chin up towards him. âTo hell with that. I take my vitamins.â
And then heâs kissing you, all soft and slow, giving your foggy brain time to catch up to what was happening. Youâre still uncomfortably warm in his arms, transferring your higher body heat, but there isnât a single part of him that can find a problem with that. Not when youâre fully leaning into him, arms and legs pressed against his own, cheek tucked against his chest and lips so soft against his mouth.
The both of you part only after heâs stolen all of the breath out of your lungs, leaving you trembling from a fever and breathless from his lips. Your lips pull into a grin as you open your eyes to glance up at him. âIf you get sick, Iâm not taking care of you.â
âShush,â he snips, arm moving down to pinch your hip, soothing it with a brush of his thumb. âI thought you were ready for bed, huh? Not ready to keep ogling me?â He tops off his teasing by pressing the back of his hand to your forehead. âIn fact, are you sure youâre even sick?â You giggle in response, lifting an arm that feels like lead to swat away his hand. âLeave me alone,â you whine dramatically before nuzzling your face into the fabric of his button-up. As soon as your nose bumps with one of the buttons, you wrinkle it, pulling back to look up at him. âCan you please go and change so we can go to bed? This cannot be comfortable.â
Spencerâs response is quick. âItâs not.â Then, he braces the back of your head with a large hand to lift you, sliding out beneath you to make a mad dash for his closet. Your head falls back onto the pillows as you let out a soft whine of displeasure, even despite being the one to tell him to get changed.
He cannot help but laugh at you as his fingers brush through his clothing options. He can feel your eyes burning through his back as he slowly slips his arms through his shirt, tossing it into the laundry basket tucked in the bottom of his closet before pulling on a larger shirt. They stay on him as he pulls off his belt and socks and tugs on some plaid pajama pants. Itâs not the first time heâs undressed in front of you, however your gaze would always cover his body in goosebumps. Once heâs properly dressed and ready for bed, he crawls back in next to you, this time pulling the duvet over the both of you. With the painkillers and the lack of a hoodie wrapped around you, he can feel the change in your body heat. Still too warm, but definitely lowering.Â
You let out a soft squeak in surprise as his arms wrap around you, giving you a tight squeeze as youâre brought close to his chest. Immediately, your head is snuggled into the crook beneath his chin, inhaling the spot of cologne he had spritzed there that morning. Despite the small rush of adrenaline you had had in his presence, your exhaustion and illness are quickly catching up to you, eyes heavy-lidded as you relax into him.Â
âGet some rest.â Spencer murmurs as he feels the tension relax out of your body, lips brushing against your forehead. A subtle check of your temperature.
The only response you can give him is a soft hum of acknowledgement, curling your fingers into his shirt as you slowly drift into sleep.
#spencer reid#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid x you#spencer reid x gf!reader#spencer reid x girlfriend!reader#spencer reid oneshot#criminal minds#criminal minds x reader#criminal minds x you#criminal minds oneshot#x reader#fanfic#fanfiction#fic#oneshot#oneshots
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Hands On My Throat
Bestfriend! Chan x Female reader
Tags: explicit sexual content, choking kink / neck play, brat taming, praise + possessiveness, slight dom/sub dynamic, oral (f and m receiving), fingering, multiple positions, couch sex, shower sex, best friends to lovers, sexual tension
Word count : 9.6k
Summary: Heâs the golden boy of your friend group, also your best friend of ten years. Touchy without thinking. Protective without asking. And hotâcriminally hotâwithout ever being yours. Until one night, in the middle of a crowded living room, his hand wraps around your neck without thinking. And you realize⌠he has no idea.
This work contains mature themes, MINORS DO NOT INTERACT!!!
â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘
There was no knock. There never was.
Chan walked into your apartment like he paid rentâhoodie half-zipped, keys jingling in his hand, the familiar scent of clean laundry and whatever cologne he swiped from his dresser that morning trailing in after him. He kicked off his shoes like a man with no shame and made a beeline for your fridge.
You didnât even look up from your laptop. âYou steal one more yogurt and Iâm reporting you to the building board.â
He opened the fridge. âYou donât even like Greek yogurt.â
âYou donât know my life.â
âI know you used it once for a TikTok mask and gagged.â
You grinned. âOkay, fine. But still. Ask before you mooch.â
He shut the fridge and padded over, yogurt in one hand, water bottle in the other. âNever have. Never will.â
Chan dropped onto the couch beside you, close enough for his thigh to press solidly against yours. He stretched his arm behind you like he was at a movie theatre trying to flirt with a stranger. His fingers brushed your shoulder, then stayed there. Rested. Comfortable.
Normal.
You didnât move. Just kept typing, one leg curled beneath you, the other pressed tight against his. Youâd long since stopped noticing how often his body found yours. Chan was touchyâhad been since high school. Always stretching across your lap, squeezing your arms, playing with your fingers absentmindedly during long talks. You didnât even flinch when his palm dropped to your knee now, warm and casual.
This was just how it had always been.
People didnât get it. Not back in school, not in college, not now when you lived a few floors apart and spent most nights either at his place or yours. The teasing from friends had been endless, and the side-eyes never stopped. But neither of you had ever crossed that line. Not even once.
Not even close.
You were hot. He was hot. That was an objective fact. But hot didnât mean available. It didnât mean interested. Not between you two.
Chan opened the yogurt with one hand and shoved the lid at you. âLick this. Be useful.â
You turned your face slowly. âYou want me to lick your foil lid?â
âIâm not dirtying a spoon just to eat this.â
âYouâre so unserious.â
âIâm efficient.â
You took the lid, licked it once with a dramatic roll of your eyes, and handed it back. âHappy?â
He grinned. âAlways.â
He popped the rest of the yogurt into his mouth and grabbed the TV remote, settling in like he didnât plan on leaving for hours. You werenât surprised. Most nights looked like thisâChan in your space, touching you somewhere, somehow, while the two of you talked about everything and nothing. He never asked. You never flinched. You barely noticed anymore.
And even when his hand slid just a little higher on your thighâthumb brushing back and forth across the thin fabric of your shortsâyou didnât think twice. It didnât register. Just Chan being Chan. Just another Tuesday.
⸝
Chanâs living room was loud. Like it always was when everyone crowded into his space.
Music buzzed from the Bluetooth speaker someone had connected half an hour ago. Your group of friends were splayed across every surfaceâcouch cushions, beanbags, someone cross-legged on the floorâarguing over which movie to watch while the food delivery slowly made its way through Friday night traffic.
You were curled into the corner of the couch, legs tucked beneath you, half-listening, half-scrolling on your phone. Comfortable. Cozy. Familiar.
Youâd lost count of how many nights like this thereâd been. Movie nights, lazy dinners, game nights that never ended with the actual game. And Chanâalways at the center of it. Hosting, leaning against walls with his arms crossed, eyes creased from laughter.
Right now, he was behind you, one knee on the couch as he leaned over to grab the remote off the coffee table. The angle brought his chest close to your back, the edge of his hoodie brushing your cheek before he spoke over your head.
âWhy are we even voting?â he asked. âWe all know itâs gonna end up being some sad indie movie with subtitles.â
âBecause you like chaos,â someone shot back. âWeâre trying to have feelings tonight.â
Chan huffed a laugh, dropped the remote onto the cushion beside you, and stayed where he wasâhalf-standing behind the couch, his weight shifting from one arm to the next.
Then you felt it.
One hand landed lightly on your shoulder. And before you could glance back or even think twice, it slid upward.
His palm curved gently around the side of your neck.
Not tight. Not firm. Just resting.
His thumb brushed the underside of your jaw once, then paused, like he was measuring something.
âHuh,â he murmured, half to himself. âYour neckâs tiny.â
He squeezedânot hard, just curious. Testing the width of it in his hand. Like he was checking the fit of something he already owned. His fingers spread easily around your throat, thick and relaxed, his thumb nearly meeting his fingertips on the other side.
You didnât move.
Couldnât.
You kept your phone up, face calm, body casual. But inside?
You were choking.
Silently. Violently.
He had no idea.
He wasnât even thinking about it. It was just Chan being Chanâtouchy, absentminded, always touching you. Always. Youâd never given it a second thought.
But this?
This was the one place youâd never imagined his hand.
The one part of your body that could short-circuit you with just a look, if the wrong person stared too long. And here he wasâfingers wrapped casually around it, thumb brushing over your pulse, eyes probably still on the TV while your soul momentarily left your body.
You blinked. Swallowed. Scrolled aimlessly to mask the tension pooling hot in your stomach.
âChan,â someone called out. âYou good?â
âYeah,â he said distractedly, thumb still grazing your neck. âJust thinking how weird it is that thisââ he gave the softest squeeze, ââcould pop like a grape.â
You let out a short, strangled sound that you masked as a cough.
Chan chuckled and finally moved away, dropping onto the armrest beside you with a bounce. His arm still brushed your shoulder, but the pressure on your throat was gone. Like it never happened.
Like it meant nothing.
And to him, it probably didnât.
But to you?
You werenât even sure if your breath had come back yet.
⸝
The door shut with a final click.
Silence fell over Chanâs apartment, the kind that only came after hours of noiseâempty cups scattered across his counter, the echo of laughter still clinging to the walls. You sank deeper into the couch with a sigh, one hand absently rubbing your shoulder where it ached from sitting in the same position too long.
Chan reappeared from the kitchen, hair pushed back by a band now, hoodie sleeves rolled to the elbows. He tossed a bottle of water onto the coffee table and plopped down beside you, then paused.
âYou okay?â he asked.
âFine,â you said, too quick. âJust⌠tired.â
He narrowed his eyes. âYouâre stiff.â
You shrugged, not looking at him. âYeah, well. You try staying upright for four hours while Minho screams at the TV like it insulted his mother.â
Chan smiled lazily. âYouâre carrying tension. Scoot up.â
âWhat?â
He patted the space between his legs. âCâmon. Let me fix it.â
You hesitated, but only for a beat.
This wasnât new. Heâd given you shoulder rubs beforeâduring finals in college, during hell weeks at your old job, after long car rides or moving days. It was Chan. Your Chan. The one person you trusted not to make anything feel weird.
So you shifted forward, sitting cross-legged between his thighs, and let him rest his hands on your shoulders.
At first, it was nothing.
Just firm pressure. The pads of his thumbs pushing slow, rhythmic circles into your traps, rolling out the knots like he had all the time in the world. You melted, just a little, head tipping forward under the strength of it.
âJesus,â you muttered, âwhere did you even learn how to do that?â
âYears of stress,â he said. âYou get good at fixing what you live with.â
You huffed something like a laugh, eyelids falling shut.
Then his thumbs pushed deeper, finding the ridge near the base of your neck, and you let out a low groan of relief.
It felt too good. Way too good.
But it was still safe.
Until his hands shifted.
Slid higher.
Thumbs brushing the edges of your neck now. Rubbing the muscles that fed into it. Soft. Slow. Intent.
Your body tensed before your brain caught upâand then it slipped.
A sound left you.
High-pitched. Sharp.
Needy.
You bit it back immediately, lips slamming shut, but the damage was done. It hung there in the air for a second too longâtoo feminine, too out of place for the roomâs quiet.
Chan stilled.
You didnât breathe.
Thenâ
âYou good?â he asked lightly, voice above your head.
You could hear the confusion. Like he wasnât sure if heâd heard it right. Or if you meant it the way it sounded.
âIâyeah.â Your voice cracked, and you cleared your throat. âJust sore.â
He hummed. Didnât say anything else.
His hands moved again, this time slower, gentlerâsweeping wide across your shoulders before sliding up again, thumbs circling your neck with almost tender pressure. Like he was feeling out the muscle tensionâbut also maybe trying to see if youâd make that sound again.
You were still. Too still.
âDidnât think you were holding this much here,â he murmured. His thumbs pressed gently into the dip just behind your jaw. âYou always carry it this high?â
You nodded too fast. âY-Yeah. Mustâve slept weird.â
His touch softened, almost affectionate now, tracing down your neck with his thumbs before slipping away entirely. The absence of it made your breath hiccup.
You couldnât look back at him.
Not yet.
Because now you werenât sure if he didnât noticeâŚ
Or if he definitely did.
You hadnât mentioned it.
Neither had he.
Not when you stood to leave a few minutes later, not when he walked you to the door like he always did, not even when his hand lingered low on your back as you slipped on your slides.
If anything, he looked more normal than usual. Relaxed. Even smiled when you told him youâd come by tomorrow to help clean.
âDonât forget Iâm your friend, not your maid,â you said.
He gave your arm a little squeeze. âYouâre both.â
And that was that.
Or so you thought.
â
The next day, his apartment looked exactly the same. A few stray cups gathered in the sink, a throw blanket half-draped off the couch, crumbs on the coffee table. You tossed your bag down and got to work wiping things down while he gathered trash from the bedroom.
âYou could at least pretend to clean while Iâm here,â you called out.
âI am cleaning,â he shouted back. âI just clean in peace. Unlike someone.â
You rolled your eyes, grinning.
It was easy again. Like nothing happened.
Until it wasnât.
He emerged from the hallway, rubbing the back of his neck, then padded barefoot across the room to take the rag from your hand.
âOkay,â he said. âCan we talk about something?â
You glanced at him. âWhat?â
He didnât speak right away.
Instead, he took the rag, folded it neatly, and set it on the tableâslow and deliberate, like he was giving you time to brace.
Then he looked at you. Really looked.
âThat sound you made,â he said, voice quiet. âYesterday. When I was rubbing your neck.â
Your stomach dropped. Not in panic. Just in⌠sheer mortified awareness.
You played dumb. âWhat sound?â
Chan tilted his head, amused.
âDonât do that.â
âI really donât know what youâre talking about,â you insisted, backing a step toward the kitchen, like that would save you.
He followed. One step. Two.
âYou made a sound,â he said, not letting it go. âHigh. Like⌠I donât know. Not pain. Definitely not pain.â
Your cheeks flamed. âOkay, and?â
âIt just surprised me.â His voice stayed calm. Curious. âYou donât usually sound like that.â
You swallowed hard, crossing your arms in a weak attempt at a barrier. âIt was nothing. You just hit a spot. I didnât even realize Iââ
âSure,â he cut in gently. âBut⌠Iâm sure Iâve hit that spot before.â
You froze.
He smiled again, but it was slower now. Measured. A little too knowing.
Your voice came out small. âSo?â
âSoâŚâ he scratched at his jaw, like he was still figuring out what he wanted to say. âI donât know. It just sounded like⌠something else.â
Silence.
Heavy. Awkward. Charged.
You looked down. âI didnât mean anything by it.â
Chan stepped a little closer.
You could smell him againâclean and warm, the same scent youâd been surrounded by for years. But now? It clung to your skin differently. Sunk into your pulse.
He was watching you carefully. Not pressuring. Not pushing.
Just⌠observing.
âOkay,â he said finally. âI believe you.â
Relief hit you, fast and fleeting.
âBut if you had meant something by it,â he added, voice lower now, âyouâd tell me, right?â
Your breath hitched.
He wasnât teasing anymore.
He wasnât joking.
You met his gazeâeyes warm, calm, steady. There wasnât a trace of judgment in them. No expectation either. Just the softest, slightest pull of curiosity.
And something else you couldnât name yet.
You looked away.
âClean your damn table, Christopher.â
He smirked. âSo thatâs a no?â
âThatâs a goodnight.â
You grabbed your bag and made a beeline for the door, pulse thudding in your throat, your skin hot all over. You could still feel the ghost of his hand there, even now. Still circling. Still squeezing.
And the worst part? You knew youâd dream about it.
The second you turned toward the door, you knew he wasnât going to let it slide.
You felt it.
That shift in the air. The narrowing of his patience. Chan wasnât dumb, and he wasnât oblivious. Youâd slipped out of a hundred close calls with him over the years, danced around every whisper of tensionâbut now?
He had a thread.
And he was pulling it.
âWait,â he said, quiet.
You kept walking.
âDonât be weird about it,â you muttered. âI said it was nothing.â
The words barely left your mouth before you felt his hand curling around the waistband of your sweatpants and pulling you back into him with a snap.
Your breath hitched.
Back to his chest. Spine to his hoodie. You froze, lips parting in disbelief.
âChanââ
He grabbed your face before you could finish. One hand cupping your jaw, the other squishing your cheeks together so your lips puckered slightly, tilting your head back against him.
Your breath caught.
âTell me,â he said, voice lowâso low it brushed against your ear like a hum. âThat moan. Was it your neck?â
You squirmed, heat rushing to your face, but his grip was firm. Not rough. Just insistent. Gentle like the beginning of something you werenât ready to name yet.
âI said it was nothing,â you mumbled through his hold.
âI heard you the first time.â His hand loosened just enough for your jaw to move, but his palm didnât leave your skin. âBut thatâs not what I asked.â
You turned your head slightly, but he followed the motion, chest warm against your back, his breath fanning across your temple.
âIâm not judging you,â he said softer now, almost amused. âIâm just asking⌠do you have a thing for this?â
His hand droppedâslow, steadyâfingertips trailing from your jaw down the curve of your throat.
You stopped breathing.
His palm hovered just under your chin, thumb resting at the side of your neck, fingers spread. Barely touching. Barely grazing.
Thenâ He wrapped.
Not tight. Not firm. Just enough to feel his fingers circle you.
Just enough to remind you how small you were in his hand.
Everything in you went still.
Your lips parted againâuseless, breathless, caught. You didnât moan this time, but the silence said enough.
Chanâs voice dipped, teasing now. âSo you do.â
You turned your face away, jaw tensed. âItâs not like that.â
His hand didnât move.
âThen whatâs it like?â
You stayed quiet, hands fisting at your sides.
âI didnât even squeeze,â he murmured, voice velvet-slick. âAnd you froze like I switched you off with a button.â
âShut up.â
He grinned. âOhhh. So itâs like that.â
You tried to step forward, but his grip on your waistband tightened just slightlyâreminding you he still had you. That he could pull again. That he would.
He leaned in, lips almost brushing your ear now.
âIâm not mad,â he said, gentle. âIâm not freaked out. I justâŚâ his thumb grazed under your chin again, slow, sweet, deadly. âI think itâs kinda cute.â
âChan,â you warned, but it came out too soft. Too breathy.
He let go of your jaw, finally. Stepped back a little.
His hand dropped from your neck like nothing happened.
But nothing about your body felt normal anymore.
âIâm gonna order takeout,â he said casually, walking to the kitchen. âYou want the usual?â
You blinked.
Stared at him, stunned. âAre you serious?â
He glanced back with a smirk.
âDead serious. Butâif you wanna talk more about your kinks after dinner, Iâm free.â
⸝
Dinner was a blur.
You barely tasted anything.
Chan ordered your usual like it was a normal night, like he hadnât manhandled your face and wrapped his hand around your neck barely twenty minutes ago. He sat across from you at his counter, hoodie sleeves shoved to the elbows, digging into pizza while casually talking about Genshin.
You blinked at your own bowl, lips still tingling, mind running marathons.
Heâd touched you a thousand times beforeâyour waist, your thigh, your cheek, your lower backâbut not like that.
Not with intent.
Not while calling you out about your kinks like he was just checking the weather.
You poked at your own noodles.
âSo weâre not gonna talk about it?â you asked.
Chan looked up, chewing, one brow lifted.
âTalk about what?â
You narrowed your eyes. âDonât play dumb.â
A beat of silence.
Then the softest smirk curled on his lips. âThought you didnât wanna talk about it.â
You stared at him.
Something low and hot coiled in your stomach. That smug little tone he always used on you when he knew heâd wonâwhen he baited you into spilling, or laughing, or saying something you didnât mean to say.
And suddenly?
Youâd had enough. You dropped your fork. Sat back in your chair.
âFine,â you said, eyes locked on his. âYou wanna talk kinks? Letâs talk.â
The smile slipped from his face, slow and sharpâlike something in him clicked.
ââŚNow?â
You crossed your arms, chin high. âYou started it.â
Chan leaned forward, resting his forearms on the counter. âAlright,â he said slowly. âLetâs go.â
His voice was low again. Not teasing this time. Steady. Intrigued. Like youâd just pulled a loaded weapon on the table and told him to pick a side.
You swallowed. âWeâve never talked about this before.â
âI know.â
âWe said we wouldnât.â
âI remember.â
âSo why now?â
Chan shrugged. âBecause you moaned like someone touched your soul when I only grazed your neck and then tried to lie about it. And now Iâm curious.â
You flushed.
âCurious about what?â
His gaze didnât waver. âYou.â
A silence stretched between youâhot, tight, heavy.
You laughed once, hollow. âGod. This is so fucking weird.â
Chan tilted his head. âIs it?â
âYes!â you threw your hands up. âYouâre my best friend.â
âIâm still your best friend.â
âAnd we donât talk about sex.â
âWe do now.â
Your breath caught.
His eyes were too dark. Too steady. There was no out here.
You inhaled slowly. âFine. What do you wanna know?â
Chan sat back again, folding his arms. âWhat else does it for you?â
You blinked. âSeriously?â
He nodded. âDead serious.â
You hesitated.
Thenâlike the words tasted like sinâyou said quietly, âHands.â
A pause.
Chanâs lips twitched. âYeah. I figured.â
âBig ones,â you added without thinking. âVeiny. Rough. Confident.â
His eyes gleamed. âThat why you always let me manhandle you like a ragdoll?â
You rolled your eyes. âDonât flatter yourself.â
âIâm just observing,â he said. âWhat else?â
You gave him a flat look. âWhat, you taking notes now?â
He leaned in again, elbows on the table, voice dark velvet. âI will if you keep talking like that.â
Your thighs pressed together under the table.
You looked away. âYou go. Say something.â
He was quiet for a second.
ThenâcasuallyââI like brats.â
You choked.
âExcuse me?â
Chan grinned. âSmart mouths. Girls who push back. Who pretend they donât wanna listen but fold the second Iââ
âOkay!â you raised a hand. âThatâs enough, Freud.â
He laughed, head tipping back.
But the tension didnât ease.
If anythingâit twisted tighter.
You bit your lip. âSo like⌠choking. Is that weird?â
He blinked. âIs what weird? Wanting it done to you? Or doing it to someone?â
You paused. ââŚBoth?â
Chan tilted his head, thoughtful. âNot weird. But itâs intense.â
You nodded slowly. âYeah.â
Another silence.
He watched you. âYou like intense?â
You looked up.
His eyes were too sharp again. Too serious.
You whispered, âYeah.â
He stood.
You froze as he walked around the counter, bare feet soundless against the tile. He stopped in front of you, hand sliding onto your jawâsoft, slowâand tilted your face up again.
Your breath caught.
âYou couldâve told me,â he said, voice low. âAny of this.â
âI thought you didnât wanna hear it.â
His grip firmed just slightlyâthumb brushing your cheek, the edge of your lip.
âI didnât,â he said. âUntil you moaned like that.â
His hand dipped.
Neck again.
Only this time, his fingers wrapped tightânot choking, but claiming. Measuring. Knowing.
And this time?
You didnât pretend.
You looked him dead in the eye as your lips parted on a breathy, involuntary gasp.
âYeah,â Chan whispered, smiling now. âThat one.â
You shouldâve walked away.
Shouldâve laughed it off, said something dumb and deflective, gone home and buried yourself in blankets until the heat left your skin.
But you didnât.
You sat thereâhis hand on your neck, your thighs clenched under the counter, breath caught somewhere in your throatâand you let him.
Chan was quiet. His eyes searched yours, slow and steady, like he was reading pages of you you didnât even know were open.
His fingers flexed slightly around your neck. A light squeeze.
Not rough.
Just enough to say, Iâm still here. You feel me, right?
And God⌠you did.
âYouâre really into this,â he murmured.
You looked away, cheeks warm. âItâs not like I think about it all the time.â
âYou donât?â
âNo.â
He hummed.
Then leaned closer.
âBut youâve imagined it.â
You stiffened.
He chuckled lowly, and you felt it through his palm, the softest vibration echoing down your spine. âThatâs not a no.â
You turned your head, just slightly, and muttered, âYouâre annoying.â
He pulled back.
Only to hook his fingers under your jaw again, tilting your chin up like you weighed nothing in his grip. âThere she is,â he said, smiling like youâd done something delicious.
âWhat?â
âThat mouth,â he said, tapping your lip once with his thumb. âThat bratty tone.â
âI wasnât being bratty.â
âMhm,â he smirked, stepping back. âSure you werenât.â
He let go.
The loss of contact was immediateâjarring.
Your neck felt cold without his hand on it.
Chan crossed to the couch and collapsed into it, legs spread, arms stretched along the backrest. Like nothing had just happened. Like your whole reality hadnât just tipped sideways.
You turned slowly. âWhat the hell was that?â
âWhat?â
You gestured vaguely at the space between you. âThat.â
Chan shrugged. âJust testing a theory.â
Your eyes narrowed. âWhat theory?â
âThat Iâve been missing out.â
You blinked. âMissing out on what?â
He grinned, head resting lazily against the cushion. âThis side of you.â
Your heart thumped.
âThereâs no side,â you lied quickly. âThat wasâ Thatâs just how I talk to you.â
âUh-huh.â
âIâm serious.â
He cocked his head. âSo youâd moan like that if Seungmin gave you a massage?â
You glared. âSeungmin gives serial killer energy.â
âThen what about Hyunjin?â
âHyunjin cries at perfume ads. Iâd never let him near my neck.â
Chan laughed.
You didnât.
âIâm not teasing you,â he said after a moment. âI just⌠I donât know. Feels like weâre finally being real.â
You chewed your bottom lip. âItâs not like I was hiding anything on purpose.â
âI know.â
âI just thought itâd be⌠weird.â
Chan leaned forward slightly, elbows on his knees. âItâs not weird.â
âYouâre not freaked out?â
âNope.â
You hesitated. âSo what now?â
He smiled, that slow, cocky, dangerous smile. âNow I get to learn things.â
Your stomach flipped.
âYouâre making it sound creepy,â you muttered.
He stood up again. Walked toward you, deliberate this time.
And when he stopped in front of you again, it felt different.
He wasnât teasing now. He was⌠curious. Focused. Like you were a puzzle heâd just realized had more pieces.
His hand came up againâback to your neckâbut this time, he didnât wrap it.
He traced.
Knuckles down your throat. Fingertips skimming your collarbone.
You held perfectly still.
âSo sensitive here,â he murmured. âAnd you never said a word.â
âI didnât think it mattered.â
âIt matters now.â
You swallowed. âWhy?â
He leaned in. Close. His breath brushed your lips.
âBecause now Iâm gonna find out what else does it for you.â
Your legs weakened.
Chan reached behind you and gently pushed you back into the nearest couch, standing over you now, looking down like you were a question he wanted to spend the night answering.
He tilted his head. âYou like being told what to do?â
You blinked, heart hammering. âWhy?â
âJust wondering how deep the brat thing goes.â
âItâs not a brat thing,â you snapped.
That smile again. Sharp. Addictive.
âThere she is.â
âUgh,â you scoffed, sinking back.
âCâmon,â he said softly. âGive me something else. Iâll tell you one of mine.â
You looked at him, wary. âPromise?â
âSwear.â
You exhaled slowly. âI like being touched⌠slowly. Like⌠teased. Not rushed.â
Chanâs eyes darkened.
âOh,â he said. âWeâre gonna have fun.â
You blinked. âYour turn.â
He dropped to his knees in front of you. Rested his hands on your knees, just above them.
Then leaned forward and saidâ
âI like control. But only when someone wants to give it up.â
You froze.
âLike⌠the second you say stop, Iâm out,â he added. âBut if you give me the green lightâŚâ His thumbs stroked slow, slow circles over your legs. âIâll ruin you sweet.â
Your breath hitched.
âToo much?â he asked, smiling.
You didnât answer.
Because truthfully?
You didnât know if it was.
You werenât sure what had shifted.
The air, maybe.
Or the weight of his eyes when he looked at you like thatâlike you were becoming something right in front of him.
But Chan didnât back down.
He stayed where he was, hands resting on your knees, thumbs rubbing slow, distracted strokes into your skin like his mind was already a step ahead.
âIâve never really talked to anyone about this stuff,â he said quietly, more to himself than to you. âNot like this.â
You swallowed. âMe neither.â
âI didnât think I needed to. Thought I had it figured out.â
âAnd now?â
His eyes met yours again, and there was something deeper in them now. Darker.
âNow I think Iâve been fucking around in the shallow end.â
You stiffened, legs tensing under his grip.
He felt it.
His thumbs stilled.
âThat bother you?â he asked softly.
You shook your head before you could stop yourself.
He tilted his head, eyes narrowing like heâd found a loose thread in you. âThen why are your thighs clenched?â
âI donât know,â you breathed.
âHmm.â
He moved his hands slightly up your legs, just a few inches, nothing dramatic. But his gaze stayed pinned to yours the whole time.
âDo you like when I talk like that?â
You hesitated.
Chan leaned in, whispering, âTell the truth.â
Your lips parted, no sound coming out.
He grinned, barely. âThought so.â
You flushed.
He sat back on his heels, exhaling a little laugh like this whole thing was amusingâand fascinatingâand fucking exhilarating.
âI think I like this side of you,â he murmured.
âWhat side?â
He brought his hand up again, knuckles brushing your neck, then trailing down your collarbone. âThe one that canât sit still when I do this.â
You shivered.
He smiled. âYou get quiet when you want something.â
âIâm not quiet.â
âMm. Youâre quieter than usual.â
He leaned in again.
Not touching this timeâjust watching you breathe.
âYou always give this much control without realizing it?â
Your mouth went dry.
âIâm notââ you started.
But he shook his head.
âNo, donât answer. I like watching you try.â
Your stomach dropped straight through the floor.
You were wet.
God, you were already so fucking wet, and he hadnât even touched you where it mattered. Not once.
He moved one knee forward, bracing his arm on the cushion beside your hips. The shift brought him closer. Too close.
And thatâs when you felt it.
Hard. Heavy.
Brushing your inner thigh.
Your breath stilled.
Chan didnât move.
His lips quirkedâjust barely.
And thatâs when you knew.
He felt it too.
Still, he played innocent.
âSomething wrong?â
Your eyes flicked to his, wide. âAre youâ?â
âI am,â he said calmly. âYou surprised?â
You blinked.
âNo.â
âBecause youâre hot?â
You exhaled slowly. âBecause youâre different.â
That made him pause.
âHow?â
âYouâve never⌠acted like this.â
He hummed, low in his chest. âYouâve never let me.â
You stuttered. âIâ I didnât stop youââ
âNo,â he agreed, nodding once. âBut you didnât give me an invitation either.â
You looked down, eyes on the space between your bodies, his arousal pressed right up against you like a secret you werenât supposed to notice.
And still, you didnât move.
Didnât breathe.
Didnât say a word.
His voice softened. âSo now that weâre here⌠wanna know another thing Iâve never told anyone?â
You nodded without thinking.
Chanâs fingers skimmed your hip, slow and deliberate. âI like watching people fall apart.â
Your lips parted, breath catching.
âBut not in a mean way,â he added. âI like the process. The way your body learns to trust me before your brain catches up. I like how shaky your breath gets when I press on the right spot. How your legs tense when youâre trying not to give in.â
He smirked, voice dipping lower.
âI like hearing that little gasp you just made. And I really like how your thighs are squeezing together again.â
You gasped again, this time audible.
He was rock hard now. You could feel him throb slightly against you. A steady pulse through his sweatpants.
And thenâGod help youâhe moved just a little.
A subtle, deliberate shift of his hips.
Just enough to feel how warm you were.
How ready.
Your jaw clenched.
Chanâs eyes flicked down to your mouth.
And that was his breaking point.
Because suddenly his hand was backâon your neck.
Not squeezing. Not dominating.
Feeling.
Like he was trying to understand how something so small could make him so desperate.
âYou donât even know what youâre doing to me,â he murmured, half-lost in it.
You swallowed. âThen show me.â
His eyes snapped back to yours.
Dark.
Ravenous.
But he didnât kiss you.
Didnât push further.
Instead, he leaned inânose brushing yoursâand whispered, âNot yet.â
Thatâs what he saidâlow, husky, brushing your lips like a secret.
But then his head dipped lower.
And you felt itâhis mouth at your cheek first, warm and lingering, then sliding lower still until his lips brushed your jawline⌠his teeth barely grazing your skin.
You jolted.
He smiled against you.
âStill holding it together?â he murmured, voice thick with amusement.
And then he bit you.
Soft. Right on your cheekbone. Just enough pressure to make you gaspânothing overwhelming, but so intimate, so damn suggestive, it felt like your body cracked open around it.
A moan slipped past your lips before you could stop it.
High. Desperate.
Sinful.
âFuckâŚâ you breathed, under your breath.
But he heard it.
God, he heard everything.
His mouth dragged to your earâbarely brushing itâbefore his tongue flicked once at the shell of it and he whispered, âSay that again.â
Your head tipped back into the couch, fingers digging into the cushion beside you.
He watched you fall apart, kneeling between your knees like you were some holy thing unraveling at his mercy.
And then, without even thinking, it slipped out.
ââŚChan.â
His name, like a prayer.
Choked. Shaken.
Raw.
He stilled.
Completely.
You opened your eyes slowly, vision slightly hazy, only to find him staring back at youâeyes wide, chest rising visibly beneath his hoodie.
âShit,â he muttered, like it hit him all at once.
Like he just realized the weight of what was actually happening.
You blinked, cheeks burning. âWhat?â
He shook his head once. âSay it again.â
âWhat?â
âMy name.â
You bit your lip, too overwhelmed to even fake control.
And that was it.
That broke him.
Chanâs hands flew to your hips, dragging you down the couch cushion just enough for him to lean over you completely. His mouth caught yours in a kiss so devastatingly hot you forgot your own name.
Teeth clashing. Breath mixing.
Tongues tangling like theyâd been waiting years for this.
Your fingers curled into his hoodie, desperate for something to hold onto as he kissed you like a man starvingâlike he was angry youâd kept this from him, angry you made him wait.
And the way you moaned into his mouth? The soft gasp you let out when his hand slipped beneath your shirt and splayed wide over your waist?
It shattered him.
Chan groaned against your lips, grinding into you onceâslow but solidâand the friction was unbearable.
You whimpered, breath hitching, thighs tensing around his hips.
âJesus, babe,â he growled into your neck, voice cracking with restraint. âYou donât even know what youâre doing to me.â
But you did.
You knew now.
And worse? You loved it.
You tilted your head without thinking, exposing your throat like instinct, and the second his lips found the base of it, the moan you let out was filthy.
Loud. Guttural.
You felt him throb against your core through both your clothes.
And he didnât even try to hide it.
His hand found your neck againâcradling, not choking. Not yet.
Just holding.
Possessive. Protective. Like it belonged to him.
âYou were gonna hide this from me?â he whispered roughly against your skin. âThis part of you?â
You whimpered, nails dragging down his back.
Chan laughed. Dark. Breathless.
âNot anymore.â
That was the last thing he said before everything blurred.
Your best friend had kissed you beforeâon your forehead, your cheek, once at midnight on New Yearâs when he was tipsy and too sentimentalâbut this was different.
This wasnât affection.
This was possession.
He kissed like heâd earned itâlike every time he let you sleep in his bed, every time he pulled you into his chest when you were crying, every time he called you baby under his breath without thinking⌠was just a slow burn countdown to this moment.
His lips moved against yours like he already knew your rhythm. Like heâd been dreaming of it and now he was tasting it for real.
And when you moaned again? He growled into your mouth.
His hands were wild now, frantic. Pulling at the hem of your shirt, tugging you closer by the hips until you were slotted right against him, heat to heat.
You could feel how hard he was.
And when he shifted his weight and pressed into you deliberately, you gaspedâhigh-pitched and startled.
He tore his lips from yours just long enough to pant, âFuck. Youâre driving me insane.â
âThen do something about it,â you whispered, already breathless.
His eyes flashed.
âSay less.â
His hand slipped beneath the waistband of your sweatpants so fast it made your breath catchâand when his fingers reached your panties, he froze.
Because you were soaked.
Dripping.
His fingers brushed along the fabricâslick and clingingâand then he dragged them lower, curling them against the wet heat right between your legs.
You gasped. Shuddered.
Chanâs head dropped to your shoulder, lips at your ear, groaning deep in his throat. âYouâre fucking soaked.â
You whimpered.
His fingers stroked onceâjust enough to teaseâbefore he yanked your sweatpants down in one go, panties and all.
You squeaked, legs instinctively clamping together, but he was already on his knees again, big hands sliding under your thighs and pulling them apart with a groan.
âLet me see,â he rasped. âCome on, babe, show me how bad you need me.â
You swallowed, chest heaving.
You had never seen him like thisânever even imagined him like this.
Hair messy, lips red, hoodie halfway off his shoulder as he pushed himself between your legs like a man starving.
And it wasnât until he looked upâuntil those dark, wrecked eyes dragged slowly up your body and met yoursâthat you realized:
You were gone.
Undone. Open.
And he loved it.
His fingers returned, sliding into your folds with maddening slowness.
You cried out, knees trembling.
He sucked in a breath, watching his hand work between your legs like he couldnât believe what he was feeling.
âDripping,â he whispered, almost reverent. âAll this for me?â
You bit your lip. âDonât be cocky.â
He smirked.
And then he curled two fingers inside you in one smooth thrust.
You screamed.
Your hand shot out, grabbing at his wrist, your thighs threatening to closeâbut he was too strong.
He pressed one hand firmly on your stomach, keeping you grounded while his fingers movedâslow, then fast, then deeper.
âNot cocky,â he panted. âJust maybe obsessed.â
You cried out again, body arching, trying to grind into his palm. Every nerve ending in your body was on fireâand he was eating it up.
âFuck, look at you,â he groaned. âMelting for me. You gonna come already?â
You shook your head, biting your fist.
He chuckled darkly. âDonât hold back now, baby. Weâve got years to make up for.â
You moaned louderâdesperate.
And then he stopped.
Just like that.
Fingers sliding out, breath ragged.
You blinked at him in shock, your whole body pulsing.
âWhatâ?â
He wiped his fingers on the hem of his hoodie like it was nothing, then leaned forward and whispered against your mouth, âIâm not letting you come with my hand. Not the first time.â
You whimpered, a broken, trembling sound.
He kissed you again, rougher this time.
And then his hands were on his hoodie, yanking it off in one smooth motion, chest glistening with sweat, body hard and flexed as he stood to kick off his sweatpants.
You stared.
Youâd seen him shirtless. Youâd seen him in boxers during sleepovers. But this?
This was feral.
Ripped, flushed, bulging under tensionâand fully hard now, cock bobbing as he leaned back over you, eyes wild with want.
âYou ready?â he asked, voice wrecked.
You couldnât even speak.
Just nodded.
Because the fire had already started, and now?
You wanted to burn.
You were breathless beneath himâbare, dizzy, skin hot and tingling in all the right places. And when he hovered over you now, sweat-slick and wild-eyed, your best friend didnât look like your best friend anymore.
He looked like a man unraveling. One second away from ruin. Yours.
His hand slid behind your knee, lifting your leg over his hip. âYou good?â
You nodded again, swallowing hard.
He smirked, gaze dropping to your lips.
âYou sure?â he asked, dragging the blunt head of his cock through your slick foldsâslow, teasing, maddening. âYou look like youâre in trouble already.â
And something in youâsomething playful and wickedâsnapped.
âGuess weâll see if you can handle it.â
Chan paused.
Your voiceâusually warm, teasing, lightâwas lower now. Challenging.
Bratty.
His brows lifted. âOh?â
You shrugged, purposefully lazy beneath him, your leg tightening around his waist. âI mean⌠you talk a big game, butââ you made a little face, ââyouâve never even kissing me before today.â
Chan blinked slowly.
Then laughed onceâdangerous and deep in his chestâbefore grabbing your wrists and pinning them above your head in one swift movement.
âYouâre cute when youâre mouthy.â
You gasped, startled, but didnât stop.
âIâm just saying,â you said sweetly, shifting under him, deliberately dragging your slick heat along his length. âYouâve waited ten years for this. Hope youâre not rusty.â
He stared down at you like you were made of sin and gasoline.
âOh, baby,â he murmured, lowering his face to yours, lips brushing your cheek. âYou want me to wreck you, donât you?â
You smirked. âIâd like to see you try.â
And that was it.
That was all it took.
He snapped.
His hand came down, wrapping tight around your throat and the next thing you felt was the blunt push of his cock stretching you open in one slow, greedy slide.
You cried out, head falling back, legs trembling from the stretch.
âFuckââ
âThat shut you up quick,â he growled, watching your face as he bottomed out.
You whimpered, fully filled now, completely caged beneath him, and for a moment all you could do was breathe.
You werenât used to thisâthis intensity. This power shift.
You werenât used to being his.
Chan didnât move right away. He stayed thereâdeep inside you, hand on your throat, his other still pinning your wristsâjust watching.
Then his voice dropped to a whisper. âSay my name.â
You bit your lip, eyes fluttering. ââŚChan.â
He pulled out halfway.
âSay it right.â
âChanâah, fuckâChan,â you gasped, back arching.
He snapped his hips forwardâhardâand your moan broke into a scream.
âYouâre soaked,â he panted. âYouâve been hiding this from me?â
âI didnât knowââ you whimpered, completely undone, ââyouâd be like this.â
He smiled against your throat, kissed it once, then bit down lightly on your jaw. âThis is what you do to me.â
And when you clenched around him at those words?
He lost it.
His grip tightenedâyour wrists, your throat, your hipsâand he started moving, every thrust thick and deep, sharp enough to send your thoughts scattering into stars.
âStill wanna be a brat?â he growled, pulling out only to slam back in harder.
You whimpered, breath catching. âYes.â
He chuckled darkly. âWrong answer.â
He dragged your hands down, pinning them to your chest now as he fucked into you, his entire body a weapon. Every thrust hit somewhere newâsome place that made you cry out, curse, beg without knowing you were doing it.
âLook at you,â he said, voice wrecked. âYou gonna be good now?â
Your pride screamed no.
But your bodyâyour soaked, trembling, wrecked bodyâsobbed yes.
You swallowed hard, hips twitching, and whispered up at him with all the strength you had left:
âMake me.â
Chanâs eyes blazed.
âOh, baby,â he growled, snapping his hips forward again. âIâm gonna make you beg.â
And from the way your legs shook?
You knew he already was.
You didnât remember when your moans got louder than the thoughts in your head.
Didnât remember when you stopped trying to talk back and started crying his name like a plea.
But your body remembered. Every inch of it was tuned to his touch nowâsweaty, sticky, soaked, and strung out beneath the weight of your best friend losing his damn mind inside you.
He hadnât stopped moving.
And he hadnât stopped talking.
âFuck, you feel like heaven,â he groaned against your skin, hips snapping forward. âBeen dreaming about thisâabout youâfor years. You were right in front of meâwalking around like that, giving me attitude, pushing my buttons.â
You gasped, fingers dragging down his back. âI wasnât tryingââ
âBullshit,â he growled, pulling out just enough to thrust back in hard, rocking your entire body against the couch. âYou knew what you were doing. You knew Iâd snap.â
You choked on a scream, grabbing at his shoulder for balance.
And then, with a glint in his eye, he lifted one of your legs onto the couch arm and pressed forwardâdeep and low.
You damn near sobbed.
âFuck, this angleââ he hissed through clenched teeth, ââyouâre squeezing me so fucking tight.â
You shivered, mouth open, unable to answerâuntil a familiar bratty smirk broke onto your lips.
âStill think youâre in control?â you managed, breathless.
Chan stopped moving.
Dead still.
And grinned.
âOh, baby girl.â
And just like that, he yanked out of you, flipped your body, and shoved your front down into the couch cushions.
His hand was already on your back, pressing you down as he lined up againâand when he slid back in with one long, filthy thrust, your scream was muffled in the fabric.
âWhoâs in control now?â he grunted, pounding into you from behind, one hand on your hip, the other wrapped around your neck againâpulling you back, making your spine curve deliciously.
You tried to fight itâtried to sass, to squirmâbut every stroke hit your g-spot like heâd mapped your body in his dreams.
And when he growled âlook at that arch,â you whimpered.
âI can feel you clenching, baby. You gonna come already?â
You hissed, bratty again through your cries. âYou wishââ
So he pulled out, flipped you again.
âKeep testing me,â he breathed, dragging you into his lap, guiding you down onto him so slowly it made your eyes roll back.
He didnât move.
Just held your hips steady, eyes locked on your face.
âYou think youâre the one riding me?â he whispered, almost tenderâuntil his fingers dug into your skin and he thrust up hard.
You screamed, forehead dropping onto his shoulder.
âOh no, baby. You just get to watch this time.â
He started bouncing you on his cock, fucking up into you, his grip rough, his rhythm feral.
âYou gonna be good yet?â he panted, breath hot on your cheek. âOr should I fuck the brat out of you?â
You couldnât speak. You could barely breathe.
But you nodded.
You were gone.
Gone for him.
He kissed your shoulder, then bit it.
And then?
He moved you again.
He was everywhereâhis weight, his mouth, his cock so deep you felt like youâd split in half.
Your cries were high and broken now, your hands slipping against his sweat-slick back as he pounded you into the cushions with intent.
And then his hand went right back to your neckâholding, lifting, claiming you while he fucked the soul out of your body.
âYouâre mine,â he panted, hips relentless. âSay it.â
You moaned, arching up into him. âYoursâyours, fuckâChanââ
He dropped his forehead to yours, eyes wrecked, heart thundering.
âCome for me.â
And this time?
You did.
With a scream that couldâve broken glass.
Your body snapped, back bowing, thighs clenching around him, tears streaking your cheeks as the pleasure tore through you.
Chan didnât stop.
He groaned, deep and desperate, as your walls clenched and fluttered around himâand then he stilled, cock buried to the hilt, trembling against you.
âFuckingâshitââ
You felt him pulse deep inside you, hot and thick.
And when he finally collapsed on top of youâpanting, wrecked, his face buried in your neckâyou couldnât stop the soft, breathless laugh that left you.
ââŚThatâs one way to discuss kinks.â
Chan huffed against your cheek.
âOh, baby,â he murmured, kissing your jaw sweetly. âYouâve got no idea how bad itâs about to get.â
â-
Your body was buzzingâtender, used, and so completely ruined that you barely noticed when Chan lifted you off the couch like you weighed nothing.
You whimpered at the movement, tucking your face into his neck as he carried you down the hall, both of you still catching your breath.
Neither of you spoke. There was only the soft pat of his feet against the tile, your fluttering heartbeat in your ears, and the low, satisfied hum he made when you clung tighter to his shoulders.
The bathroom light flickered on. Warm. Clean. Familiar.
He didnât hesitate. Just toed off the last piece of fabric on his body and stepped under the stream with you still in his arms.
The hot water hit your back and you gasped at the contrastâalready sensitive, skin electric under every drop.
Chanâs big hands slid over you, soothing, slow. He lathered up a washcloth and began running it gently over your shoulders, your thighs, between your legs with such focus you had to fight the urge to melt all over again.
âYou okay?â he asked, quiet against your ear, lips brushing your temple.
You nodded. ââŚThink you broke me.â
He chuckled, chest rumbling against yours. âNot even close.â
But still, his touch was careful now. Reverent. Like he couldnât believe you were real.
And maybe thatâs why you did it.
Why you let your hands roam a little more than they needed to.
Why you leaned in and started trailing soft kisses down his collarbone.
Why your lips didnât stop there.
Because you couldnât believe he was real either.
Not like this. Not yours.
He stilled when your mouth reached his chest.
You kissed it slowly, tenderly, running your fingers down his abs, over the ridges of muscle that flexed beneath your touch.
ââŚBabe,â he whispered, voice low, warning, already unraveling. âDonât start.â
You looked up at him through wet lashes, lips parted, innocent and knowing all at once.
âWhy not?â you murmured, kissing just below his ribs. âYou let me fall apart for you. Let me return the favor.â
His breath hitched. He was already hardening againâand he knew it.
You kissed lower.
And lower.
And then you were kneelingânaked, dripping, your knees cushioned by the shower mat, hands already stroking his length back to full, pulsing attention.
He groaned.
âFuck. Fuck, you look so good down thereââ
You wrapped your fingers around his cock, squeezing gently, lips brushing against the flushed head of his cock. He jerked in your hand, and you hummed.
âI never told you my last kink,â you said sweetly, licking a slow stripe along the underside.
His hand hit the wall above your head, unsteady. âYeah? What is it, baby?â
You smiled up at himâdark, sinful, soft.
âI donât have a gag reflex.â
Chan let out a noiseâguttural, choked, wrecked.
âJesus Christ.â
And then you took him in.
All of him.
Slow. Deep. Deliberate.
His mouth fell open, eyes rolling back as you swallowed around him, your throat relaxing on instinct.
âOh my fucking Godââ he rasped, hips jerking forward before he caught himself, panting hard, water cascading down his back.
You pulled off with a wet pop, licking the tip before dragging your tongue along the base and sucking him back in just as deep.
He moanedâloud, shameless, one hand grabbing the back of your head while the other gripped the shower wall like a lifeline.
âFuck, fuck, babyâ youâre gonna kill meââ
You moaned around him in response, eyes half-lidded, hands stroking what your mouth couldnât reach.
Every sound he made went straight to your coreâdeep and breathy and so needy, it felt like a reward just to listen.
âYouâre unreal,â he groaned. âFucking unrealâhow is this even realââ
You let your eyes flutter closed, increasing the rhythm, hollowing your cheeks, spit and water dripping from your chin as you let him fall apart above you.
And when his stomach clenchedâwhen his thighs started to trembleâyou just held him tighter, took him deeper, and moaned his name from the back of your throat.
âFuckâ Iâm gonna comeâbaby, Iâm gonnaâshitâdonât stopââ
You didnât.
Not until his hips jerked one final time and you tasted all of himâthick and hot and desperate on your tongue.
He roared your name, damn near sliding down the wall as his whole body seized, then shook.
When he finally opened his eyes again, you were smiling, swallowing, licking your lips like youâd just won.
Chan stared.
Then laughedâragged, disbelieving, utterly in awe.
âYouâre gonna be the death of me,â he panted, hauling you up into his arms again. âMark my words.â
You kissed his jaw, cheeky. âThen what a way to go.â
He groaned, forehead against yours.
âWeâre not sleeping tonight.â
And you knew he meant it.
â
The water was still warm when Chan reached for a towel and wrapped it around your body, gathering you into him like you were something precious. Like you might disappear if he blinked.
You were trembling a littleânot from cold, but from the comedown. The wild pace of everything. The stretch, the heat, the orgasm that had left your legs like jelly. The way heâd held your gaze while wrecking you on the couch like you werenât his best friendâlike you were already his everything.
Now? Now he was silent. Gentle.
A hand on the back of your head, stroking slowly.
âYou okay?â he asked, voice raw and deep, brushing his lips to your temple.
You nodded into his chest. âMhm. Just⌠processing.â
He smiled faintly, lifting you into his arms againâstill naked, still wetâand carried you to his room without another word. The towel stayed wrapped around you, his hands never letting go, like it physically pained him to stop touching you.
He laid you on his bed with careful hands, kissed your forehead, then disappeared for a momentâreturning with your hoodie, a fresh pair of his boxers, a warm water bottle, and a glass of juice.
You stared at him, body curling toward his naturally as you laid thereâwrapped in soft cotton, legs still aching in the best way. âSo⌠this really happened.â
Chan tilted his head, gaze steady. âAre you regretting it?â
âNo,â you whispered, too fast. Then, âAre you?â
His brow furrowed like youâd offended him. âBaby. Iâd do it all over again right now if you werenât already shaky.â
You flushed, heat blooming up your neck. He noticed it. Of course he did. His thumb brushed the side of your throat, reverent.
âStill canât believe thatâs your kink,â he murmured, soft and possessive and wrecked. âYou have any idea what that did to me?â
You licked your lips, looking away. ââŚThereâs more.â
Chanâs eyes darkened. âOh, youâre gonna tell me.â
You tried to hide your smile. âWe never talked about sex in ten years and now you wanna hear all my kinks?â
âNow I need to,â he replied, curling his hand behind your neck and pulling you closer again. âYou let me touch you like that. Let me own you. You think I can go back to pretending youâre just my best friend after that?â
His mouth was so close. His fingers were back to stroking your skin, down your back, over the dip of your waist.
Your voice came out quieter now. âIâve never given up control that easily.â
âI know.â He cupped your jaw, kissed the corner of your mouth. âAnd Iâll never take that for granted.â
You met his eyes. âBut Iâd do it again.â
His breath stuttered. And then he kissed youâsoft this time, lingering.
âYou have no idea how hard Iâm holding back right now.â
âI can tell,â you whispered, glancing down at the way his towel was starting to shift.
He growled against your skin, pressing his forehead to yours. âThis changes everything.â
You nodded slowly. âBut it doesnât ruin anything.â
âNo,â he murmured, brushing a thumb over your cheek. âIt just means weâve got⌠ten years to make up for. And I plan to.â
You smiled. âSo⌠youâre mine now?â
Chan pulled back just enough to lock eyes with you.
âNo, baby,â he said with a dangerous smirk. âYouâre mine. And I donât share.â
Your stomach fluttered. You pushed at his chest, bratty. âMm. You werenât this cocky when we were just friends.â
He climbed over you again, straddling you on the bed with that wolfish glint in his eye.
âYou never let me touch you like this before. Now I know what you sound like when you moan my name?â
He leaned down, voice dark, hungry.
âYou have no idea how cocky Iâm about to get.â
And just like that, you knew.
Youâd opened Pandoraâs box.
And Chan had no plans to close it.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Authors note: AAAAAHHHHHHH!!! God this was sooo juicy to write!!!! I am so sorry for my absence guys, theres been so much on my plate⌠Iâve actually started an original book that i plan to publish some time in the future. đ¤ But Iâm here now and ill post more frequently. As for all the requests? I SEE EVERYTHING, I WILL WORK ON THEM!! Just hold on for me babes!
Anyway, if you enjoyed this one, leave me a comment, like and reblog guys!! My taglist is open so let me know if you want to be added or removed!
Taglist: @tsunderelino @innieandsungielover @inlovewithstraykids @reignessance @jeonismm @sttnficrecs @herejusttemporary @krssliu @kenia4 @miilquetoast @thackery-blinks @leeminho-hall @suga-is-bae @butterflydemons @inejghafawifesblog @malunar28replies @minchanlimbo @mal-lunar-28 @breakmeofftbr @itvenorica124 @slut4junho @deepblueocean97 @thequibbie @yaorzu-blog @imagine-all-the-imagines @just-bria @mischievousleeknow @ifyxu @melanctton @thelostprincessofasgard @binniebb @sillylittlecat1 @darkwitchoferie @m-325 @headfirstfortoro @imseungminsgf @ihrtlix @vernorica123 @hwangjoanna @swordswallower2000 @niki007 @yxna-bliss @firelordtsuki @justwonder113 @mbioooo0000 @sammhisphere @nebugalaxy @cutecucumberkimberly @chancloud8 @sunflwerstar @shxdowofdarkness
#skz imagines#straykids x reader#skz smut#bang chan#bang chan smut#bang chan skz#chan smut#bang chan angst#skz fanfic#chan drabbles#chan fluff#chan x reader#chan angst#bang chan x reader#skz bang chan#chan bang#chan skz#straykids fanfic#straykids fic#straykids fluff#straykids smut#straykids imagines#skz x reader#friends to lovers
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The Witnesses
Pairing: Oscar Piastri x Felicity Leong-Piastri (Original Character)
Summary: Felicity and Oscarâs Years at Haileybury School through the eyes of their classmates.  Â
Warnings and Notes: Big thanks to @llirawolf , who listens to me ramble đ
I spent every free minute I had in four days writing this and you are getting it today because I'll be busy tomorrow â¤ď¸
Also warning, about a mention of an eating disorder and a bruised sternum and pneumonia...I think that's everything? Wait, I forgot: Teenagers being horrible.
Samir MalikÂ
Oscar Piastri didnât talk much when he first arrived at Haileybury.
Not in the way that most new kids were shy. No, Oscar was⌠quiet. Composed. Too still for a 14-year-old. He never cried. Never complained.
He was gone half the time for Karting, and the rest of the time he had his uniform perfect, his homework early, and his backpack zipped with the kind of militant precision that made most of them suspicious.
He was brilliant.Â
Top marks in math and science by week two. Made the cricket team without breaking a sweat.
But he was always alone.
Some of the boys thought he was a bit of a freak. Too good. Too blank. It wasnât cruelty at firstâjust curiosity turned sour when Oscar didnât play along.
By week two, someone had called him Robot Boy.
By week three, it stuck.
Samir had never said it himself. But heâd laughed the first time someone made the joke in the dormsâwhen Oscar finished a physics quiz in four minutes flat and just⌠sat there blinking while everyone else panicked.
âCareful, Robot Boy. Youâre gonna fry a circuit.â
Oscar didnât respond.
Didnât flinch.
Didnât even blink.
He just looked at them, impassive and too old, and returned to his notebook.
Samir remembered thinking: Jesus. Maybe he really is a robot.
Then came Felicity Leong. She had been there since 7th grade. Singaporean, sharp-eyed and scarily good at Latin. The kind of girl who corrected the teacher when the subjunctive case was wrong and then looked bored five seconds later.
And Robot BoyâOscarâreacted.
Not big. Not obvious. But Samir noticed it.
Oscar sat next to her in every class. Lingered in hallways. Spoke softly to her in the library like he was afraid too many syllables would scare her off. It was weird. And tender.Â
And completely recognisable from the stone-faced boy Oscar was around everybody else.Â
Everyone saw it.
Everyone.
Which is probably why Josh Whitmore opened his dumb mouth.
They were fourteen. Sitting in the courtyard. Samir remembered it clearlyâcrisp day, grey skies, the smell of overcooked chips wafting from the canteen.
Josh was laughing about something, flicking bottle caps at a tree, and then saidâloudly, and with the smugness only a 14-year-old bully can muster:
âBet Robot Boy only likes her âcause sheâs got no tits and doesnât talk back.â
There was a pause.
Oscar, who had been two benches over reading some engineering book like a pensioner, stood up.
Walked over.
Didnât say anything.
Just looked at Josh with this dead-calm expression that made the hairs on Samirâs neck stand up.
And , thenâwithout a single wordâOscar shoved him. Hard.
Josh went stumbling into the grass with a yelp, more stunned than hurt, and Oscar just kept walking forward. Not fast. Not angry.
Controlled.
Like something had clicked inside him.
âDonât talk about Felicity like that,â he said quietly.
Josh scrambled up. âMate, it was a jokeââ
Oscarâs voice cut through him like a blade. âSay it again.â
And the whole courtyard went silent.
Samir remembered Felicity arriving seconds laterâhair pulled back, eyebrows furrowed, voice soft with warning.
âOscar. Stop. Itâs not worth it.â
And the moment she spoke, the tension snapped. Oscar took a step back. His fists unclenched. He looked at her like gravity pulled him in place.
And then he walked away.
Oscar didnât get detentionâJosh didnât dare to report it.
Samir sat on the edge of the Year 9 dorm windowsill that night, watching the courtyard disappear into dusk, chewing the inside of his cheek and thinking about the look on Piastriâs face.
Not rage.
Not even anger, really.
Just⌠defense. Like heâd been wired to stay calm until someone touched the single thing he wouldnât let them ruin.
And then he snapped.
Samir had seen blokes lose their heads before. Shouting, flailing, posturing. That wasnât what Oscar did.
Oscar had moved like someone protecting something. Like something old and silent and raw had cracked open, and all that ice they joked aboutâRobot Boy and the Circuit Board Brainâhad turned into fire instead.
He didnât look robotic anymore.
He looked like he cared.
Which, to be honest, made everything a bit awkward now. Because once Samir saw itâreally saw itâhe couldnât unsee it.
The way Oscar sat on the floor beside Felicity in study hall, backs to the radiator, knees just brushing. The way he always knew if she was too quiet. The way sheâd pass him a protein bar without looking, or rest her head against his shoulder when she was reading.
It wasnât loud.
It wasnât a performance.
It was just⌠them.
And suddenly all the stupid jokesâthe beep boop, the Emotion.exe not found memes, the Robot Boy nameâfelt wrong.
Small.
Because Oscar Piastri wasnât a robot.
He was just the kind of kid who didnât trust the world enough to show what he felt.
Not until someone gave him a reason to.
And Samir had a feeling that reason had a Singaporean accent, an encyclopedic knowledge of Classical literature, and a deadpan stare that could kill gods.
Oscar made his point.
Nobody called him Robot Boy again after that.
***
The thing about Oscar â and Samir had said this more than once, usually while watching another one of their classmates fumble the bare minimum â was that he had better emotional range than half their year combined.
Because while the rest of them were fumbling through breakups and making disasters out of almost-relationships, Oscar Piastri had already picked his person. And he didnât waffle. Didnât wander. Didnât flirt for fun.
It was ridiculous, really.
Unfair.
Downright confusing at times.
They were sixteen, surrounded by the usual chaos of boarding school â boys who thought vulnerability was weakness, who treated relationships like status badges or games, who ghosted girls because they didnât know how to talk about feelings without making it a joke.
And then there was Oscar. Unflappable. Quiet. Surgical with his logic. And somehow the most emotionally well-adjusted, devotion-wrapped-in-a-Haileybury-blazer boyfriend any of them had ever seen.
By the time they were 15, Oscar Piastri and Felicity Leong were a couple.Â
And Oscar just⌠adored Felicity. With the steady, unshakeable devotion of someone who knew.
Most guys in their year didnât know what to do with girls like Felicity. Too smart, too composed, too quietly self-possessed. The kind of girl who could skin you alive in debate club and do it politely.
Oscar, though?
 He adored her. Out loud. No hesitation.
It wasnât the loud kind of high school obsession, either. He didnât brag or trail after her like a puppy. There was no performative PDA or âlook at usâ hallway snogging.Â
Oscar didnât half like her. He didnât flirt with other girls. He didnât act embarrassed or annoyed when she beat him on mock exams.
He just⌠adored her.
Unapologetically.
Even at fifteen.
Samir remembered watching them once in the library â Felicity curled in a beanbag with a thick textbook in her lap, Oscar sitting next to her with his laptop open and a hand casually resting on her ankle like he didnât even realize he was doing it. Like it was just instinct now. Like: here is the person I love, and here is how I stay tethered to her.
And he meant it. That was the weird part.
Oscar showed up to breakfast half-asleep but always saved her a seat.
 He remembered her test dates better than his own.
He didnât need to say it every five seconds. He didnât do public declarations or grand gestures.Â
What he did do was carry her bag when her shoulder hurt.Â
Robot boy, Samir thought again, watching as Felicity leaned into the touch, eyes fluttering shut for a second.
It was him pulling her into his side when she was quiet for too long â not asking questions, just making room.
Oscar waited for Felicity after her lectures. Learn how she took her tea and get genuinely annoyed when someone else got it wrong.
Oscar brought her snacks during exam week. Walked her back from the library even when it was out of his way. Remembered her coffee order. Looked up random facts about things she liked just to talk to her about them.
Once, when she missed school for a week with pneumonia, Oscar handwrote her notes for every subject and stapled them with colour-coded tabs.
Samir remembered watching Oscar slip into the common room once, find Felicity asleep with her head on her textbook, and quietly set a blanket over her shoulders before sitting down with his own homework like it was just part of his day.
No show. No gloating. No performance.
Just a sixteen-year-old boy with a heart so obvious it didnât need to be shouted.
âGod, youâre like her golden retriever,â Aarya had joked once.
And Oscar, without missing a beat, had said, âYeah. And Iâd bite anyone who tried to hurt her.â
No hesitation.
Samir had seen a lot of boys fake maturity. Fake romance. Fake effort.
 But Oscar Piastri? He meant every word. Meant it with his hands and his actions.Â
Oscar Piastri did things no other teenage boy would ever be willingly admit to doing.
He wasnât embarrassed to sit in the front row of Felicityâs orchestra concerts, even if she only had a three-minute violin solo buried in the middle of a 42-minute program.Â
He brought flowers, every time â not some sad petrol station bouquet, but little ones he clearly chose himself, wrapped in brown paper like a scene from a European indie film.
He knew when her auditions were. When her math competitions were. He even showed up to the Year 10 robotics club showcase â the one nobody went to except for teachers and bewildered parents â just because Felicity had designed the sensor rig for one of the projects.
And when Samir had casually asked why, Oscar blinked at him and said, "Because it matters to her."
It was that simple.
It always was, with Oscar.
It was the small things, mostly. The things most guys their age would've called "whipped" or "soft" or "too much."
Like how Oscar had learned to braid hair.
Not just ponytails or messy plaits â proper French braids. Fishtails. Crown braids. Because Felicity would get headaches during exam weeks and needed help when her hands were sore from writing too much, and Oscar â ever the problem solver â had simply watched a YouTube tutorial and figured it out.
He kept extra hair ties on his wrist for her after that.
Or the time she went through a stress baking phase and made it exactly three cupcakes before remembering she hated measuring.
Oscar took over the mixing bowls.
By the end of the term, he knew her favourite cookie ratios by heart â and the best way to sneak extra chocolate chips into the dough without her noticing.
The worst â or best â part?
Oscar even tried ballet.
Ballet.
Oscar Piastri, who had the natural grace of a brick in sneakers, signed up for a beginnerâs movement class because Felicity once offhandedly said it helped her de-stress. Samir only found out because someone caught a glimpse of him in the dance studio trying not to fall over during a pliĂŠ and asked if he was doing it for PE credit.
âNo,â Oscar had said flatly, stretching his arms out in second position. âIâm just trying to understand why she likes it.â
And it wasnât weird. Somehow it wasnât weird.
Because Oscar wasnât trying to impress her. He wasnât performing. He just⌠cared.
Cared for the things that Felicity cared about.Â
***
It was two weeks before the Winter Formal when Samir walked into the common room and saw something that made him stop dead in his tracks.
Felicity Leong â calm, brilliant, terrifyingly precise Felicity â was in the middle of the room, humming under her breath as she corrected Oscarâs posture with both hands on his shoulders. Oscar, meanwhile, was standing stiffly like he was being prepped for battle, his expression somewhere between concentration and mild existential crisis.
âYouâre not holding a steering wheel,â she said, deadpan.
âI feel like Iâm about to crash anyway,â Oscar muttered.
Samir blinked. âIs this⌠dancing?â
Oscar gave him a flat look. âApparently I have the grace of a traffic cone.â
âHeâs not that bad,â Felicity said generously, adjusting his grip. âHe just counts every beat like it owes him money.â
Oscar rolled his eyes. âYou try learning footwork after three hours of calculus.â
Felicity only smiled. âThatâs why weâre practicing now.â
They had cleared space near the windows â moved the armchairs back, stacked textbooks on one end table, even pushed the coffee table into the hallway. The overhead lights had been switched off, leaving only the soft glow of lamps and the flicker of fairy lights someone had pinned up for the holidays.
Samir watched as Felicity placed one hand in Oscarâs, the other on his shoulder, and gently nudged him into motion.
âOne, two, three,â she counted under her breath. âOne, twoâOscar, stop anticipating.â
âIâm trying!â
âYouâre panicking.â
âI am notâokay maybe I am.â
They stumbled a little â Oscarâs foot knocking into hers â but Felicity just laughed, soft and patient. She never lost her temper with him. Never seemed bothered that he learned slower than she did, or forgot the names of steps, or treated every turn like a math equation. She just⌠kept showing up. Kept teaching him.
And Oscar â to his credit â kept trying.
Even when he blushed. Even when he muttered under his breath about how stupid he felt. Even when he absolutely did step on her foot and looked so horrified that she had to reassure him three times that it didnât hurt.
They danced like that for almost half an hour. Him counting. Her humming. The two of them spinning in slow, careful circles like they existed in their own little orbit.
By the end of it, they were both breathless.
Felicity smoothed her hands down the front of his jumper. âYouâre not hopeless.â
âThatâs the nicest thing anyoneâs ever said to me,â Oscar muttered.
âYouâll be fine,â she said softly. âItâs just dancing.â
âItâs not just dancing,â he said, meeting her gaze. âItâs you. I donât want to mess it up.â
She smiled. âThen stop trying to get it perfect. Just hold me and move.â
And when the formal finally came around â when Samir saw them gliding across the dance floor in that same easy rhythm, Oscar whispering something that made Felicity laugh into her hand â he thought back to that night in the common room. To the effort. To the nerves.
To the way love didnât always look like big declarations.
Sometimes it just looked like a boy learning to waltz because the girl he loved wanted to dance.
And sometimes, that was more than enough.
***
Oscar never bragged.
He never looked around to check if anyone noticed. He just did it â quietly, consistently, like loving Felicity was the most natural thing in the world. Like of course heâd learn basic hairstyling and baroque composer facts and pointe shoe padding techniques.Â
Like he got how brilliant she was, and just wanted to make the world a little easier for her to keep being that brilliant.
It was also everything most girls in their year didnât even dare ask for â consistency, care, quiet protection. Not flashy gestures, but a soft kind of loyalty that said, I choose you. Every time.
Samir once watched Oscar press a cold bottle of water to the back of Felicityâs neck after an exam because she looked faint. No drama. No âlook at me.â Just calm, practiced concern. Like he knew her body better than she did.
They called him âRobot Boy,â but Samir was starting to think the rest of them were the malfunctioning ones.
Because Oscar had cracked something early â something the rest of them hadnât figured out yet. That being soft for someone wasnât weakness. That loving your person out loud didnât make you less cool. That being emotionally available wasnât some humiliating thing you had to disguise with bravado.
Oscar didnât pretend he wasnât in love.
He was in love.
He knew it. Felicity knew it. Their entire year group knew it.
And Oscar Piastri didnât give a shit.
Samir once saw Felicity walk into the dining hall in one of Oscarâs hoodies, three sizes too big and clearly stolen that morning. Oscar just smiled at her like she was the sun.
Fifteen years old and that boy looked at her like heâd already found the rest of his life.
And somehow, Samir thought, he probably had.
And when someone once dared to suggest that he was âwhipped,â Oscar had looked up from his physics homework and said, without a trace of embarrassment:
âIâm in love. Thatâs not weakness.â
And Samir, for the first time, hadnât had a comeback.
Because somehow, the most emotionally competent teenage boy in their entire school⌠was the one they all thought had no feelings to begin with.
Robot boy, his ass.
Oscar Piastri was the gold standard of emotionally intelligent teenage boys since 2016.
***
Aarya PatelÂ
Aarya had come to Haileybury on a scholarship.
The full-ride kind. Interviews, essays, and recommendation letters from teachers who had to dig their nicest shirts out of the back of their closets just to help her prepare.Â
Aarya knew the weight of price tags, the stress of term fees, the exact moment each of her shoes started to fray. She knew how to patch the inside hem of a school blazer so no one noticed. Knew how to say no when her friends wanted to go into town for sushi.
So she noticed things. She had to.
She noticed when girls wore real gold instead of plated. When someone's watch wasnât for fashion, it was family inheritance. When a hair tie cost more than her whole pencil case.
Which was why Felicity Leong had confused the hell out of her.
Because Felicity was rich.
Not new money, not dadâs-got-a-tech-startup rich. ââ Not the noisy kind. Not the constantly-proving-it kind.
She was old money. Singaporean old money. The kind that whispered.
That quietly owned real estate portfolios on three continents.Â
The kind that came with family foundations.Â
The kind that embroidered initials into silk pillowcases.
The kind that never checked price tags and had luggage that matched â properly matched.Â
Aarya had heard the whispers early on.Â
Leong family. Raffles Girls. Mandarin spoken like silk. Designer uniforms tailored to fit better than any off-the-rack brand. Someone had once said her mother wore Van Cleef like it was costume jewelry. Another claimed Felicity had pearls for every mood.
Felicityâs family didnât have money.Â
Felicity had capital-W Wealth.
It was the kind of old, Singaporean, intergenerational wealth that didnât need to prove itself. The kind that came with century old family trees, and museum-grade jade quietly worn under school jumpers.
Felicity Leong had the kind of posture that came from years of ballet and finishing school, the kind of enunciation that sounded like every word had passed inspection before being spoken.Â
Her family, Aarya overheard once, lived in an estate in Bukit Timah. Had staff. Flew private when they visited Europe. Somebody once said they had an art collection they anonymously lend to museums.Â
And Felicity had things.
Tiny pearl studs that had to be real â the soft lustre gave them away.
Blouses that always sat just so at the collarbone.Â
A cashmere jumper in Year 11 that no one ever commented on, but Aarya had once googled out of spite. It had cost more than Aaryaâs family paid for rent in three months.Â
Felicity had real diamond studs tucked in velvet-lined boxes, pristine skirts that probably cost more than Aaryaâs entire wardrobe, and a collection of tailored trousers that couldâve walked straight out of a Vogue editorial.
Silk hair ribbons. A monogrammed Smythson planner. A designer school bag Aarya had only ever seen in glossy fashion magazines. Her shoes were always leather. Her pens were engraved. Engraved.Â
Felicity had matching pyjama sets. She had a vintage Cartier tank watch she never even bragged about. She had cashmere socks for winter term. She packed her designer shoes in individual dust bags when they went home for the holidays. Her luggage had wheels that actually worked.Â
Felicity probably didnât even know how much her shampoo cost.
And she didnât show off any of it. That was the worst part.
She didnât flaunt it.
Felicity walked around like all of this was normal â not curated, not performative, just part of the atmospheric pressure of her life.
And at first?
Aarya hated her for it.
She hated Felicity for how effortless it looked.
 For how quietly beautiful Felicity was, in a way that didnât try.
For how softly she spoke.Â
For how her handwriting looked like it had been lifted out of a calligraphy book. For how teachers always nodded when she raised her hand â not indulgently, but with interest.
For how Felicity could be so nice and still walk around in tailored coats and diamonds.
Aarya couldnât even afford a coffee from the library vending machine. Felicity carried tea sachets in a silver tin and never even mentioned it.
It burned.
It seethed.
Because if youâre going to be that rich, Aarya thought bitterly, at least have the decency to be horrible.
But Felicity wasnât horrible.
She was polite. Warm, in a quiet, shy way. She said thank you to staff.
She offered her umbrella to someone once during a sudden downpour â someone she didnât even know.Â
She tutored a Year 9 boy in maths after he cried in front of the headmistress. She knew the names of the cleaners and left sticky notes for the librarian when she borrowed extra books.
And the worst part?
Felicity never talked about the money. Never even alluded to it.
Aarya had been waiting â waiting â for the moment the mask would slip. When Felicity would say something out of touch or condescending or make a comment about âthe lower setsâ or sniff at a secondhand jumper.
But it never came.
Aarya hated that more.
Because if Felicity had been awful, mean, or arrogant, it wouldâve been easier. She could have ranted about privilege, weaponised her bitterness into snarky commentary.
But Felicity just... was.
She tucked herself into study carrels like she was trying not to take up space. She said thank you to the dining hall staff. She read novels between classes and didnât raise her hand in lectures unless she was sure she wouldnât dominate the conversation.
She turned up to group projects with colour-coded folders.
And when they got partnered in chemistry for three weeks, Felicity had quietly brought extra gloves because Aaryaâs had a hole.
She didnât say anything. Just passed them over with that quiet kind of grace that made Aarya want to scream.
It wasnât just that Felicity had wealth.
It was that she had elegance. Ease. A kind of unbothered generosity that made Aarya feel every frayed seam and secondhand paperback like a flashing neon sign.
And the worst part?
Felicity didnât even seem to notice.
She wasnât trying to make anyone feel lesser. She wasnât trying to impress anyone. She had just... grown up differently.
With rooms named after ancestors and furniture older than some countries.Â
With a family who collected art, not Air Miles. With a mother whoâd taught her how to arrange flowers and match emeralds to skin tone.
And despite all of it â all of it â Felicity still sat beside Aarya in physics and offered Aarya her muffin from lunch without blinking.
Felicity still invited her to study sessions. Felicity still lent her a scarf when it got too cold in the dorms.
Felicity didnât try to be likable.
She just was.
And that, eventually, was what made Aarya stop hating her.
And the resentment, eventually, turned into a grudging admiration.
Then into friendship.
Then into the kind of quiet, no-bullshit loyalty that only happened when two girls survived adolescence together â one of them with patched seams, the other with pearls and perfect grades, both of them brilliant in entirely different ways.
Even if Aarya still thought the pens were a bit much.
***
It started with a hoodie.Â
A battered blue thing with a cracked HP TUNERS on the front. It looked like it belonged to a mechanic. It even had frayed cuffs.Â
Felicity had the sleeves pulled over her hands like she didnât even realise she was doing it, the drawstring half chewed from stress. It didnât match anything else she wore â not the fine-strapped watch, not the clean ballet flats, not the pearl earrings tucked discreetly into her lobes.Â
Felicity was, by all accounts, elegant. She wore her school uniform like it was custom-tailored. Her hair was always neatly pinned or knotted or braided, and her posture could make a royal court jealous.
And that hoodie also wasâŚhuge. Like, swamp-her-entire-body huge.
Aarya squinted.
And then Oscar Piastri walked into the study room, said, âHey, you found it,â and tugged at the hoodieâs shoulder playfully.
Aarya blinked.
 Oh.
Felicity didnât blush. She didnât really do that kind of fluster.
 She just shrugged and muttered something about âcold lecture hallsâ and kept reading.
But after that, it became a pattern.
Every couple of days: a hoodie that was too long in the sleeves. Sometimes even one of Oscarâs t-shirts in the common room in the eveningâŚor while working out â old and soft and worn thin from washing.Â
And always, always, Felicity wore them like they were hers. Like she forgot they werenât.
Felicity couldâve worn Chanel to breakfast if she wanted. Couldâve wrapped herself in silk and cashmere and hand-stitched blouses from Orchard Road boutiques.Â
She had worn a Hermes scarf last year, that had made a couple of girls nearly choke with jealousy.Â
But somehow Felicity Leong always ended up in something that belonged to Oscarâlike sheâd rather have cotton that smelled like karting fuel and shampoo than diamonds on her collarbone.
Felicityâs favourite thing in the world seemed to be Oscar Piastriâs hoodies.
She wore them like a clockwork.
Like a habit.
Like comfort.
Aarya remembered watching her slip into one after cross-country practiceâhair damp, trainers muddy, too tired to talk. The hoodie was washed soft, practically shapeless, sleeves pulled over her knuckles like armor.
Felicity had a Burberry coat in her wardrobe. A cashmere trench. A silk blazer with the tags still on. But she reached for Oscarâs hoodie instead.
Always his.
It unsettled Aarya.Â
 Because she didnât get it.
 Didnât understand how someone who had grown up in private jets and penthouses would choose something so ordinary. So threadbare. So unpolished.
So⌠him.
And Aarya couldnât help thinking about that.Â
***
It was a rare quiet Saturday.
Most of the boarding house had scatteredâŚlibrary, practice fields, town runs. Aarya had stayed behind to finish a chemistry write-up, tucked into the corner of the common room with Felicity, who was curled up in one of the armchairs by the fireplace, reading something with six bookmarks and a page full of margin notes.
She was wearing one of Oscarâs hoodies again.
Navy blue. Faded print on the front. Sleeves too long, cuffs tucked between her fingers.
And below itâher skirt and dainty chanel flats.
The contrast struck Aarya like it always did.
âYou know,â Aarya said, âIâve always wondered something.â
Felicity didnât look up. âIs it the secret to cold fusion? Because if it is, youâll have to wait until I finish this chapter.â
Aarya huffed a laugh. âNo. Justââ She gestured vaguely toward the hoodie. âYou always wear his stuff. But everything else you own is, like, designer. Hermes. Dior. Chanel. Your school coatâs got pearls on the buttons.â
Felicity slowly lowered the book and met her gaze with a raised brow. âAnd?â
Aarya shrugged. âJust wondering why. You donât have to wear secondhand hoodies. And you obviously donât care what anyone thinks, so⌠why do you?â
Felicity was quiet for a long moment. Not in a dismissive way. Just⌠careful.
Then she said, very simply, âBecause I picked the hoodies.â
Aarya blinked.
Felicity looked back at her book, fingers absently smoothing the creased corner. âThe rest of it? The labels, the cuts, the colours? My mother picks all of that. Iâve been wearing what she tells me to wear since I was born.â
Her tone wasnât bitter. Wasnât even resigned. It was like Felicity was describing the weather.
âShe says itâs about presentation. About honouring the family, and making the right impression. I donât get a say.â
Felicity paused. âBut Oscarâs hoodies? Those are mine. I choose them. They donât fit right and they donât match and sheâd probably faint if she saw me in themâbut I chose them. No one else.â
Aarya sat back, something slow and sharp settling in her chest.
âAnd he never asks for them back,â Felicity added, softer this time. âNot once.â
She didnât say what that meant.
She didnât need to.
Aarya got it.
The hoodie wasnât just fabric. It was freedom. A small rebellion. A claim staked quietly in a world that tried to dress her up and keep her still.
And Oscarâquiet, loyal Oscarâhad just let her take it. Again and again. Without question.
Aarya didnât ask any more questions that day.
But she never looked at those hoodies the same way again.
Because Felicity Leong had everything money could buy.
 And she chose something that couldnât be bought.
 She chose a boy from Melbourne with karting calluses on his hands and softness in his eyes.
 She chose his hoodie.
Over pearls. Over diamonds. Over all of it.
***
Lara PearsonÂ
Felicity was that girl.
Not in the mean, perfect-blonde-hair, head-girl-with-a-clipboard way. No. She was terrifyingly quiet, borderline surgical with her pens, and once corrected a Year Nine on their French conjugation without looking up from her sudoku.
Hereâs the thing about Felicity Leong:
She wasnât just smart.
She was unreal.
Lara had known it since Year Sevenâsince the first science lab, actually, when everyone else was still figuring out how to hold a test tube without shattering it, and Felicity was calmly correcting the teacher on which dilution would give the most accurate result.
At eleven.
With pigtails.
And a voice like honeyed ice.
Lara remembered turning to Samir afterward and whispering, âDid she justââ
And Samir, wide-eyed, had nodded. âYeah. She did.â
By Year Nine, Felicity had memorized three Shakespeare plays for fun and was tutoring older students in calculus.
By Year Ten, sheâd won the national science fair, debated a university professor on climate policy (and won), and casually designed an app to help Aaryaâs dyslexic younger brother learn phonics.
And by Year Eleven?
Well.
By Year Eleven, Felicity could walk into a room and silence it with nothing more than a glance and a perfectly worded dismantling of someoneâs half-baked argument about capitalism.
But it wasnât just her academics.
It was everything.
The way she saw the worldâlike it was a system of interlocking parts, and if she looked long enough, sheâd figure out the code. Like she could disassemble reality and rebuild it better if she only had the time.
Felicity Leong was terrifying in that quiet, precise way genius often is.
People underestimated her sometimesâmistook her silence for shyness, her neat clothes and high-achieving record as nothing more than that. But Lara had seen behind the curtain.
Sheâd been there when Felicity, at thirteen, explained quantum entanglement using toast and jam. Sheâd watched her annotate the entire syllabus of a new elective subject over one day, then act like it wasnât a big deal.
She once caught Felicity solving a university-level maths problem on the back of a napkin at lunch. Just because she was bored.
Lara had always done well in school. Top sets. Good grades. Solid work ethic.
But Felicity?
Felicity operated on a different plane entirely.
It wasnât just brainpowerâit was how her mind moved. Fast and sharp and endless. Like she could zoom out to the big picture and zoom in to the minutiae at the same time. Like nothing ever truly surprised her because sheâd already run every possible version of the conversation in her head.
***
But Felicityâs intelligence was why Lara didnât get it.
She really didnât.
It wasnât that she disliked Oscar Piastri â he was fine, in that blank-expression, too-polite, probably-a-robot way.Â
But if youâd asked her in Year 8 whether the smartest girl in school would end up with the guy who spent weekends elbow-deep in axle grease and came back smelling like burnt rubber, she wouldâve laughed in your face.
Felicity Leong was dazzling. Quiet, yes â but only in the way old libraries were quiet: full of brilliance and backbone.Â
Felicity Leong was elegance and sharp wit and competence in every form. Her handwriting looked like it belonged in a museum. Sheâd fixed Laraâs broken laptop charger with a paperclip once and had taught herself enough German to read Goethe in the original by the time she was fifteen.
Oscar Piastri, by comparison, was⌠a boy. A nice boy, sure. A talented one, okay. But still just a boy.
What Lara didnât understand was why Felicity â of all people â had chosen to orbit him.
It wasnât that Oscar was awful. He wasnât. He was fine. He was kind, soft-spoken, occasionally funny when he forgot to overthink it. And it was clear heâd rather set himself on fire than say anything cruel. But he was also⌠well, kind of boring.
A âkarting wonderboy,â sure. But what did that even mean? Half the school didnât know what F4 was, and the other half thought racing was just glorified Mario Kart.
Meanwhile, Felicity was Felicity. Lara had watched Felicity take down Year 11 boys in ethics class and build model bridges like she was auditioning for a structural engineering firm.
And now Lara was watching Felicity:
Felicity reminded Oscar of deadlines.Â
Edited his physics papers.Â
Built him an study schedule complete with snack reminders.Â
Used highlighters to colour-code his flashcards.
Taught him how to waltz before the formal.Â
She once hand-sewed a new velcro patch on his racing gloves because he didnât want to replace them before the season was over.
Once, Lara had caught her baking cookies. When she asked why, Felicity had said, âOscar hasnât been eating properly again. Heâs stressed about qualifying.â
Qualifying. Like this was Formula One. Like the boy with the still-cracked phone screen and perma-oil-stained hoodie was actually Lewis Bloody Hamilton.
Felicty bought extra headphones because Oscar kept losing his.
Wrote out study notes for both of them in neat, annotated colors.Â
And the worst part was, Felicity didnât even seem to notice she was doing it.
âShe could be doing anything,â Lara muttered to Aarya once. âShe could build rockets. Or code AI. Or date someone who doesnât smell like petrol.â
Aarya just shrugged. âShe wants Oscar.â
âBut why?â
Lara didnât get it. Couldnât get it.Â
Not when she watched Felicity spend hours printing laminated flashcards for Oscarâs media training, or reorganizing their entire joint Google Drive so he wouldnât have to fumble around for assignments while competing. Not when she skipped out on a party because he had food poisoning in a hotel halfway across the world and she wanted to FaceTime him through it.
Lara noticed all of it. The little ways Felicity folded herself around Oscarâs life â like it was the easiest thing in the world.
And it drove her mad.
Not because she didnât like Oscar. But because she couldnât see it. Couldnât understand why Felicity wasnât bored out of her mind dating some karting wannabe who barely looked up from his data logs.
âWhy him?â she asked once, in a rare late-night moment when it was just the two of them brushing their teeth in the bathroom.
Felicity paused. âWhat do you mean?â
âYou could have anyone. Like, literally anyone. Youâre⌠you. Why Oscar?â
Felicity blinked, then smiled a little â that soft, steady smile that meant sheâd already thought about this a hundred times.
âOscar listens,â she said simply. âHe makes space for me.. Heâs kind. I donât need to be brilliant for him.â
Lara frowned. âThatâs it?â
Felicity laughed. âThatâs everything.â
Lara didnât get it then. Not really.
***
Lara had always assumed that Felicityâs thing with Oscar was a phase.
A soft rebellion. A teenage distraction. Something tender and temporary â the kind of first love you always remember but eventually outgrow.
Because surely Felicity Leong â with her perfect grades and National Science Fair medals â wouldnât tether herself to a life that revolved around⌠motorsports.
But the thing was, Felicity didnât tether herself to Oscarâs world. She learned it. She mastered it. She made it her own.
At first, Lara thought it was just a phase as well.
Felicity started watching every single race Oscar was in â even the low-res, buffering-on-a-good-day livestreams from some freezing karting track in Belgium. She could quote qualifying lap deltas off the top of her head.Â
Lara thought Felicity would get over that as well. That she'd stop rearranging their study sessions around free practice and qualifying streams. That she'd eventually tire of kart gear ratios and F2 team hierarchies and why certain drivers struggled in wet conditions.Â
But she didnât.
If anything, it got worse.
By the time they were sixteen, Felicity could name every FIA junior formula, describe the mechanics of a front wing configuration, and explain the difference between a wet setup and a quali setup like sheâd invented them herself. She talked about tire degradation the way most people talked about poetry.
Felicity watched every livestream â even the terrible, stuttering ones from F4 UAE, or the Renault Eurocup feeds that froze any time there was contact. She knew the race engineers by name, the team principals by accent, and she corrected Oscarâs telemetry notes when he was too tired to spot his own oversteer correction patterns.
âI didnât even know she liked motorsport,â Lara said once, baffled.
Aarya had just raised an eyebrow. âShe doesnât.â
âThen whyâ?â
âBecause he does.â
That was when it hit Lara â the sheer scale of it. Because Felicity Leong never did things halfway. Not for school, not for people, not for love. Especially not for Oscar.
Felicity never said it aloud. Not in a performative way. There was no âsupportive girlfriendâ act. No posts, no attention-seeking, no fake fandom.
She just... learned. Every single detail. Every rule and reg. Every pit strategy and suspension tweak. Quietly, methodically, fiercely.
By 17, she was the only girl in their year with a solid working knowledge of torque curves and Marxist literary theory.Â
***
It happened on a Thursday.
Lara would remember that forever, because Thursday was chicken katsu day in the dining hall, and she had just sat down with a plate she was emotionally invested in when Thea dropped the bombshell:
âFelicity and Oscar are graduating next year.â
Lara blinked. âWhat?â
âTheyâre doing all their A Levels in one go. Likeânext year. And then theyâre out. Bye-bye, Haileybury.â
Lara looked down at her tray, then back at Thea. âThatâs not a thing people do. Thatâs not legal.â
Thea shrugged. âIt is if youâre both freakishly smart and barely sleep.â
âThatâsâwhat? No. No. Theyâre in Lower Sixth. Weâre in Lower Sixth.â
Thea gave her a look. âFelicity has been in Upper Sixth since she was twelve, spiritually. You know that.â
Lara stood up, plate forgotten. âNo, Iâm sorry, what do you mean theyâre graduating?â
âAsk them.â
So Lara did.
She found Oscar and Felicity exactly where she expected to: curled up together in the corner of the Sixth Form study lounge, surrounded by papers and highlighters and a bottle of cold jasmine tea. Felicity had one leg slung over Oscarâs and was annotating a textbook with deadly precision. Oscar was typing something on his laptop while absentmindedly twisting a strand of her hair around his finger.
âIs it true?â Lara demanded.
Oscar looked up. âIs what true?â
âYouâre graduating this year. Both of you.â
Felicity didnât look up. âYeah.â
âHOW?â
Oscar yawned. âShe made a study plan.â
âShe made aââ
âCalm down,â Felicity said mildly. âI just doubled up our course loads. With enough independent research modules, the board approved it.â
Lara stared at her. âThe exam board approved it.â
âOf course they did. I wrote a proposal.â
Oscar added, âAnd sheâs been ghostwriting half my essays, so Iâm fine.â
âYou WHATââ
âNot ghostwriting,â Felicity corrected. âI just build the argument outlines and annotate the sources. He still writes them.â
âShe gave me a quote bank last week that was 36 pages long,â Oscar added proudly.
Lara made a noise that was not human.
Felicity finally looked up. âYou know this place isnât built for students like us, right?â
âWhat does that mean?â
âIt means Iâve had to correct the teachers twice this term already. And I edited the chemistry revision guides because they had typos. And Oscar needs more time for racing and less writing brain numbing essays for computer sciences.â
Lara sat down slowly, like gravity had finally caught up with her.
âYou two are insane.â
Felicity offered her a chocolate from the stash hidden in Oscarâs pencil case. âThank you.â
Oscar smiled around the bite of his protein bar. âHey, on the bright sideâyou get to keep the top spot in the year. Weâre gone in May.â
Lara took the chocolate like a woman defeated.
âDo your parents know?â she muttered.
Oscar just shrugged. âMum said it sounded like something weâd do.â
Lara looked at themâtwo overachieving academic weapons, casually breaking the rules of reality with matching stationeryâand groaned.
âI swear to God,â she said. âIf you both end up solving world hunger and winning a Nobel Prize by twenty-five, Iâm going to riot.â
Felicity smiled faintly. âI donât want a Nobel.â
Oscar raised a brow. âWhat do you want instead?â
âI want a family. And a kitchen thatâs mine.â
Oscar leaned over and kissed her cheek.
Lara watched, sighed, and leaned back in her chair.
âFine,â she said. âBut if you graduate early and still come first in everything, Iâm slashing your tires.â
âFair,â Felicity said, already back to highlighting.
***
The thing about Felicity Leong was that she didnât do things halfway.
That applied to everything â coursework, violin practice, her color-coded study calendars, the banana bread she baked to perfect moisture ratio â but especially, especially, to Oscar.
It was easy to assume Felicity had fallen into Oscarâs world â that she was the brilliant girlfriend dragged into a boyâs motorsport pipe dream. Lara had assumed that, once.
But sheâd been wrong.
Because Felicity didnât fall into things.
She researched them. She learned them.
And when it came to Oscar, she practically earned a damn degree in motorsport before she ever turned 18.
She didnât just support Oscarâs career. She understood it. She translated it.
And somewhere between late nights watching practice footage on a shared laptop and Oscar ferrying between boarding school weekends and regional races, Felicity changed her future for him.
Not theoretical physics. Not aerospace. Not architecture, even though she had a mind for structural form that made half the teachers beg her to apply to Cambridge.
Mechanical engineering.
Because, as she later explained in the most matter-of-fact voice imaginable: âIf heâs going to race cars, someone has to make sure the people designing them arenât idiots.â
Lara had wanted to laugh. To shake her and say you donât have to build your life around some boy in a helmet. But she didnât.
Because Felicity wasnât building around him.
She was building with him. Every skill she added, every race she studied, every piece of obscure motorsport knowledge she collected â it wasnât submission. It was strategy. Partnership.
That was the thing about Felicity Leong.
Felicity never asked for recognition. Never asked for thanks. She just poured everything she had into a boy sheâd picked at fourteen years old â all the brilliance, all the discipline, all the love she didnât know how else to express.
And that boy?
He kept every handwritten note.Â
Every flashcard.Â
Every time sheâd saved his arse with last-minute essay corrections.Â
He memorized the way she liked her tea, the sound she made when she was tired but trying to hide it, the exact point of her back that hurt after a full day in the ballet studio.
He knew.
He always knew.
And Lara, watching them from the outside, had to admit â even if she never quite understood it, even if it had seemed ridiculous once â that it wasnât about karting. Or racing. Or obsession.
It was about building a world around each other.
And somehow, Felicity and Oscar had managed to do exactly that.
***
Theodora âTheaâ Wheeler:Â
Thea didnât really notice it at first.
Not in the way that mattered.
Because Felicity Leong was the kind of girl who did everything right. Always neat. Always on time. Always top marks and clean shoes and perfect plaits in her hair. She didnât miss things, and nothing about her looked broken.
But then there was the pancake.
It was a Saturday morning at school, and brunch had been served in the big hall with the sunny windows. Everyone had queued up in pyjamas and slipper socks, because it was the weekend and the rules were a little looser, and someone had convinced the kitchen staff to make pancakes with chocolate chips.
Thea remembered being excited.
She remembered how good it had smelled. How the syrup had pooled just right on her plate. How loud the hall had beenâlaughter, clatter, sugar-fuelled chaos.
She also remembered looking over and seeing Felicity with a plate in front of her.
Empty, except for one plain pancake.
No syrup. No toppings. Just sitting there, going cold.
Felicity didnât touch it.
She was talking to someoneâSamir, maybeâand smiling politely, like everything was normal. Like she wasnât hungry. Like she wasnât supposed to be hungry. Her fork didnât even move. Her hands were folded in her lap like she was trying not to be seen.
Thea frowned. âYouâre not eating?â
Felicity looked over. Blinked once. âIâm not really hungry.â
Which⌠okay. Maybe she wasnât. Maybe sheâd had toast earlier. Or maybe she didnât like pancakes. But it happened again.
And again.
Over and over, Thea would see her at meals with only a few bites of food on her plate. Or skipping dessert. Or picking at soup with a spoon like it was some kind of science experiment.
She started making excuses.
I had a big breakfast. My stomach hurts. Iâm fine.
Always with that same quiet voice. That same polite smile.
Thea tried not to stare. Tried not to wonder, too hard, why Felicity would leave halfway through lunch and come back ten minutes later with red-rimmed eyes.Â
Or why Oscarânew, quiet Oscarâhad started appearing next to her at meals, always coaxing, always gentle, always watchful.
By the time they were 14, Thea had stopped offering her sweets. Felicity never said no outright. Sheâd just look at them, like they were something too loud, too bright, too much.
Oscar Piastri arrived in Year 10 â quiet, weirdly calm for a 14-year-old, brilliant in the kind of way that made the top sets nervous.Â
He didnât talk much. Not at first. But he sat next to Felicity one afternoon in Maths, and by the end of the week, it was like they were always together.
Always.
At meals. In the library. Walking between classes. Doing study in the common room, two heads bent over one laptop with her notes and his logic and some weird telepathy that meant they barely even had to speak out loud anymore.
And then there was the toast.
It was a rainy Tuesday morning when Thea walked into the common room and saw Felicity curled up in her usual corner of the sofa, Oscar beside her with a plate balanced on one knee.
He handed her a slice.
She took it.
Ate it.
Just like that.
Thea tried not to stare.
And over the months that followed, it kept happening. Toast at breakfast. A tangerine at break. Half a sandwich at lunch. Then a whole one. Then soup and salad and seconds. Slowly. Carefully. Like she was relearning hunger and safety in the same breath.
It wasnât perfect. Some days, Felicity still picked at her food. Some days she was quieter than others, her hands shaking just slightly as she tore a muffin into a hundred pieces and only ate two.
But Oscar always noticed.
Always passed her water. Or offered a bite of whatever was on his plate. Or distracted her with quiet jokes or flashcards or that lookâthe one that said, I see you, and Iâm not going anywhere.
And slowly, Felicity changed.
Her face rounded out. Her jeans fit better. She started wearing Oscarâs oversized hoodies more oftenânot to hide, Thea thought, but because she liked them. Because they smelled like comfort and safety and someone who never made her earn softness.
It hadnât been school that helped. Or housemistresses. Or whispered conversations between girls who didnât know how to help.
It was Oscar.
Oscar, who never pushed but always stayed. Who never made her a project, just held space. Who gave her quiet things: time, food, choice.
It was slow, the way she changed.
But steady. Stronger, somehow.
Like someone finally gave her permission to be a person again. Not a perfect doll. Not a flawless student. Just⌠Felicity.
And Thea?
Thea didnât say anything. Not then.
But she smiled more when she looked at them. And saved them seats in the dining hall.
Because not everyone gets someone who sees the storm and still stays.
But Felicity did.
And thank God for that.
***
Jian Chen:Â
Hereâs the thing about Oscar Piastri:
He wasnât loud.
He didnât announce his feelings, didnât broadcast his loyalties, didnât write grand gestures for the world to see. He mostly kept his head down, did his work, and blended quietly into the fabric of Haileybury life, except for weekends when heâd disappear for races and come back holding another trophy.
But when it came to Felicity Leong?
Oscar was something else entirely.
Jian first noticed it one grey, rainy afternoon in the common room. It was supposed to be revision timeâhalf the year group crammed onto sofas and beanbags, surrounded by textbooks and lukewarm cups of teaâbut nobody was really paying attention.
Felicity had claimed one end of the sofa, curled up small and quiet, eyes closed, a pale crease between her brows like something hurt.
Jian had seen that look beforeâhis sister had cramps like that sometimes, the kind that made her shrink into herself and hiss out quiet breaths, counting down seconds until they passed.
But Felicity didnât say anything. Didnât complain. Didnât ask for sympathy.
She just sat there, curled around her discomfort, trying to make herself invisible.
And Oscar?
He didnât even ask. Didnât hesitate. Didnât wait for her to explain.
He just walked in, glanced at her, and without a word, fetched a hot water bottle from his own room. He placed it gently into her hands, as if heâd done it a hundred times before. And then he sat beside herânot too close, not crowding herâbut quietly there. A solid, steady presence.
Jian watched him reach into his bag and pull out a little packet of painkillers, nudging it towards her with his knuckles. Felicity murmured something too quiet for Jian to hear, but Oscar nodded anyway, looking at her like sheâd made perfect sense.
Felicity settled the hot water bottle against her stomach and finally let her head rest on Oscarâs shoulder, eyes shut tightly, breathing carefully.
Oscar didnât move.
Not when Samir shouted something about the rugby game. Not when someone accidentally dropped a textbook and everyone laughed. Oscar just stayed there, shoulder steady beneath her cheek, his own textbook forgotten, his posture relaxed but watchful.
And Jian realised something important then:
Oscar wasnât just taking care of Felicity.
He was guarding her quiet, letting her rest, silently building a wall around her so the world couldnât touch her until she felt better again.
It wasnât dramatic. It wasnât obvious. It was just Oscarâsteady, calm, gentle Oscarâdoing exactly what Felicity needed without being asked.
Jian never said anything about it.
He just knew, quietly, in that moment, that Felicity Leong had someone who cared about her in a way most people never experienced at sixteen.
***
It had looked bad on the livestream.
Jian hadnât been watching the race â not live, anyway â but by Monday morning, the clip had already made it to their yearâs group chat. A hard hit to the barrier, fast and sharp. Everyone winced when they saw the replay.
âHeâs definitely hurt,â someone had said.
âMaybe just winded?â
Jian hadnât been sure.
But when Oscar walked â no, shuffled â back onto campus with his duffel bag slung over one shoulder and a tight grip on his ribs, it was obvious.
He was doing that thing where boys tried not to look in pain. Jaw clenched, back straight, breathing shallow. Stubborn. Stupid. Trying to out-think biology.
Jian was coming back from the vending machine when he saw them: Oscar moving stiffly toward the dorms and Felicity, already heading toward him from across the quad like sheâd been waiting all morning. Not hurrying. Not running. Just moving with this terrifying sense of purpose.
She didnât say anything when she reached him.
She just looked him over, eyes scanning his posture, his expression, the way he held his bag. Then she reached up, gently tugged the strap from his shoulder, and took it for him.
Oscar let her.
That was the first sign something was properly wrong â not the bruising, not the wince, but the fact that Oscar Piastri let someone carry his karting bag.
âChest?â she asked softly.
âSternum,â he admitted.
âShow me.â
âFlissââ
She was already guiding him off the path, out of sight. Not dramatic. Not performative. Just decisive. And he followed her.
Jian didnât mean to watch. But he did. From behind the hedge, from just the right angle, he could see Oscar unzip his hoodie, slowly and carefully, and pull it open just enough to show the purple-green bloom of bruising across the center of his chest.
Felicity inhaled sharply. Not loud â not even really angry. Just that soft, immediate breath that said: thatâs worse than I thought.
She didnât scold him.
She just pulled a small, square cold pack from her coat pocket â who just had those on them?? â cracked it to activate the chill, and handed it to him.
âTen minutes,â she murmured. âThen Iâm getting you a wrap.â
Oscar nodded like she was the team physio. Like she was the only one allowed to call the shots.
Jian watched her wrap a hoodie around his shoulders, help him sit carefully on the edge of the planter, and sit beside him without saying a word. Her hand hovered near his elbow â not touching unless he needed it.
And later that night, when Jian passed the study lounge, he saw them again.
Oscar was half-reclined on the couch with a pillow behind his back, wrapped snug in a hoodie and blanket. Felicity had brought him tea. Actual tea. Like from a ceramic mug, with honey.
She was retyping his notes for him â because writing hurt â and every few minutes, sheâd reach over and tap his side, reminding him to breathe properly.
He didnât even flinch anymore.
They talked softly. Shared a few bites of biscuit. Argued gently over whether or not Oscar needed to skip gym the next day.
And it wasnât romantic in the hearts-and-roses kind of way.
It was just serious.
Two teenagers acting like theyâd already figured out what commitment looked like.
***
Jian remembered the first time Felicity didnât show up to class.
It was Year 11, early winter. Frost bit at the windows and the whole school smelled faintly of overboiled radiators and wet wool. Normally, Felicity was the one person you could count on being there â with her pens neatly aligned, hair pinned back, eyes alert like sheâd memorised the textbook the night before.
But that Tuesday, her desk was empty.
Oscar showed up late. Which was already weird. He looked like hell â hoodie zipped all the way up, jaw set, hair damp from rushing across campus.
He didnât say anything when he dropped into his seat. Just opened Felicityâs notebook alongside his and took notes for both of them.
By Wednesday, people were whispering.
âShe has a cold,â someone muttered. âNothing serious.â
âSheâs just resting.â
But Oscar looked worried. Not anxious. Worried. That quiet kind of dread that sat behind the eyes and didnât leave room for anything else. He stopped responding in group chats. Barely ate at breakfast.
Jian finally caught him in the library, elbows deep in a pile of flashcards that clearly werenât his.
âSheâs not just sick, is she?â
Oscar didnât look up. âShe canât breathe right.â
Jian froze. âWhat?â
âSheâs got this rattling sound in her chest. Canât sleep. Keeps saying sheâs fine, but she passed out in the bathroom yesterday.â
âWhat the hellâdid she go to the nurse?â
Oscarâs jaw clenched. âThe nurse said itâs a bad cold. Told her to hydrate and rest.â
âBut itâs worse?â
âShe couldnât stand up long enough to brush her teeth this morning.â
Jian swallowed. âShit.â
Oscar finally looked at him, eyes bloodshot and furious. âHer family thinks sheâs being dramatic. Her mum called and told her to stop being soft.â
That made something cold crawl down Jianâs spine.
âSheâs got pneumonia,â Oscar added quietly, voice like steel.
Jian blinked. âHow do you know?â
âI looked up the symptoms. She should be in a hospital. She needs antibiotics and oxygen.â
âDid you tell the school?â
Oscar gave him a look. âDo you think theyâll listen to me? Or to her surname?â
It was the first time Jian truly understood that something wasnât right in the Leong family.
Two days later, the air outside was the kind that turned your fingertips numb within five minutes. Jian was walking back from the dining hall when he saw someone pull up to the front gate in a sleek black car â too expensive, too polished, definitely not a school-run vehicle.
Out stepped a man in a sharply cut coat. Mid twenties, maybe. Cold expression. Perfectly gelled hair.
Henry Leong.
Jian had heard of him. Older brother. Oxford grad. Worked in finance. Apparently one of Singaporeâs âmost eligible bachelorsâ if the gossip was to be believed.
Henry Leong walked into the reception office like he owned it.
Jian didnât mean to eavesdrop. But the walls were thin, and Henry wasnât exactly quiet.
âMy sister is exaggerating,â he said crisply. âShe does this. Iâm just here because Mother insisted someone check. Is she actually ill, or just emotionally delicate again?â
Jian felt something clench in his gut.
He slipped around the side entrance. Oscar was with Felicity in the common room, holding a bowl of lukewarm soup with one hand and adjusting her blankets with the other. She looked pale â really pale â her lips tinged slightly blue. Her hair was a mess. Her eyes were glassy.
She still said, âIâm sorry I didnât clean up,â when she saw Henry in the doorway.
Oscar muttered, âDonât apologise,â and touched her forehead gently. âYouâre burning up again.â
Thatâs when the door banged open.
Henry walked in like a storm in cufflinks.
âWhat the hell is going on?â he demanded. âWhy are you wrapped up like some invalid?â
Felicity blinked at him, confused. âHenry?â
âI told Mother Iâd come. You didnât pick up your phone. Whatâs this I hear about you being bedbound over a little cold?â
Oscar stood up.
Jian didnât know what he expected from Oscar Piastri â the quiet, methodical one. But it sure wasnât the way he stepped between Felicity and her brother like it was instinct.
âShe has pneumonia,â he said flatly.
Henry raised an eyebrow. âExcuse me?â
âYou heard me.â
Felicity coughed weakly. Henry turned toward her. âYou always do this. Turn minor problems into some dramatic cry for attention.â
Oscarâs voice went quiet.
âI think you should leave.â
Henry blinked. âExcuse me?â
âYou heard me. Get out.â
âIâm her brother.â
âAnd Iâm the one whoâs been here while she canât stand without help. Iâm the one who held her when she couldnât stop coughing. And you showed up days late with condescension and talking to your sick sister like she is some kind of burden.â
Henryâs expression twisted. âYouâre just some scholarship kid with a go-kart.â
Oscar didnât flinch. âMaybe. But I know what love looks like. You clearly donât.â
The silence that followed was icy.
Henry left within five minutes.
Jian didnât say anything. He just sat quietly while Oscar rubbed gentle circles into Felicityâs back until her breathing evened out.
It happened the next morning.
Jian had just made it to the dining hall, still groggy and halfway through buttering his toast, when Samir came in wide-eyed and pale.
âShe collapsed.â
The knife slipped out of Jianâs hand.
âFelicity?â he asked, already on his feet.
Samir nodded, winded. âOscar found her on the floor. She tried to get to the bathroom andâhe said she couldnât breathe. Theyâre calling an ambulance.â
Jian didnât remember running, but the next thing he knew, he was outside her dormitory block, shoulders heaving, the gravel scraping under his shoes. A crowd was already gathering. One of the teachers was ushering students back like this was some normal incident and not something serious.
But Jian could see Oscar through the glass door. Kneeling on the floor, arms around Felicity, talking to her in that soft, steady voice like the sheer force of his calm could pull her back from the edge.
She was barely conscious. Her lips were bluish. Her head lolled.
She looked nothing like the girl who used to correct teachersâ maths on the whiteboard. Or the one who wore pearls with her hoodie. Or the girl who could keep five group projects afloat by sheer force of will.
She looked tiny.
Like a girl who had been telling everyone she was in pain and nobody had listened.
Someoneâmaybe the new nurseâtried to take her pulse, but Oscar didnât move until the paramedics arrived. And even then, he rode in the ambulance.
Jian watched them go with a kind of hollow, stomach-dropped dread.
Because it wasnât supposed to be like this. Not her. Not Felicity.
The fallout came fast.
That afternoon, the head of pastoral care called an emergency staff meeting. People were whispering in the halls. The school nurse who had told Oscar it was âjust a coldâ didnât come in the next day.
And suddenly, all the teachers were tripping over themselves â asking if anyone had noticed anything. If there were signs they missed. If perhaps Miss Leong hadnât been given the appropriate care plan.
Jian nearly laughed when he heard that.
Because everyone missed it. Everyone except the boy with the quiet voice and the karting calluses on his fingers. The one who showed up with ginger tea in his thermos and sat through every night reading beside her bed.
They called Felicity âstoic.â âWell-mannered.â âMature beyond her years.â
What they meant was that she didnât complain loudly enough to be taken seriously.
Oscar never once said I told you so.
But Jian could see it in the stiffness of his shoulders when he finally came back onto campus, two days later, looking like he hadnât slept at all. His hoodie was wrinkled. His jaw was tight.
âSheâs okay,â he told Jian quietly, like heâd been rehearsing it. âTheyâre keeping her a few more days for observation. But her feverâs gone down. The oxygenâs helping.â
And then, for the first time in all the years Jian had known him, Oscarâs voice cracked.
âThey didnât listen,â he whispered. âShe told them she couldnât breathe, and they still didnât listen.â
Jian didnât know what to say. So he just sat down next to him.
Because it wasnât just that Felicity had been sick.
It was that sheâd almost disappeared in front of everyone â and theyâd let her.
But not Oscar.
Never Oscar.
***
Jian wasnât sure when it happened.
When Oscar Piastri â robotic, unflappable, ice-cold-under-pressure Oscar â became the kind of boy who let his girlfriend tuck a tissue packet into the sleeve of his school jumper.
It was week six of term. Cold season had arrived like a tidal wave. Half the year group was coughing like they were on the brink of death, and Oscar â who rarely got sick â had finally succumbed. He was pale and sniffling, his voice a little croaky, and he kept blinking like his head was full of fog.
But he still showed up. To every class. Even cricket conditioning.
Jian watched, slightly baffled, as Felicity intercepted him between classes with a packet of throat lozenges and a thermos of ginger tea that very obviously wasnât from the dining hall.
âYouâre supposed to be sleeping,â she muttered, dragging him by the elbow toward a bench in the quad.
Oscar flopped down obediently. âI tried. My nose betrayed me.â
âYou sound like a gremlin.â
âAnd yet, youâre still here.â
Felicity made a face but pulled out a folded blanket from her bag anyway â a blanket, for godâs sake â and tucked it around him like he was a grandparent in a chilly church pew.
Jian blinked. He wasnât even surprised anymore.Â
That was when Oscarâs phone rang. He fished it out of his blazer pocket, glanced at the screen, and handed it straight to Felicity without a word.
âHi, Nicole,â she said, already standing up and pacing away, the phone pressed to her ear. âYeah. Iâm with him. No, itâs not the flu. Just a head cold. Yes, I made sure heâs drinking water. Yes, I made him soup yesterday. No, he didnât like the ginger but he drank it anyway. Iâll make sure he sleeps early.â
Jian just stared.
Because Oscar was sitting there under a blanket. Sneezing into a tissue. Looking more exhausted than usual. And still â still â he watched Felicity pace the quad with that tiny half-smile he only seemed to wear when she was around. Like he liked being taken care of. Like he trusted her with all of it.
By the time Felicity returned, she handed the phone back and crouched to check Oscarâs forehead with the back of her hand. It was so natural. So practiced. Like this had happened a dozen times before.
âYour mum says sheâs going to mail you a care package,â Felicity murmured. âAlso, that I deserve a medal.â
Oscar leaned his head against her shoulder. âYou do.â
Jian watched them quietly â the boy who always smelled like karting fuel, and the girl who wore cashmere socks with chanel boots â and thought, Okay, maybe this isnât some weird co-dependency thing. Maybe itâs just⌠love.
The strange, soft kind.
The kind that comes with tea, and tissues, and phone calls home.
***
Group Chat: Haileybury Survivor Squad 2020
Jian, Samir, Thea, Lara, Aarya
Aarya: guys GUYS I HAVE NEWS đ¨đ¨đ¨
Jian: this better be good itâs 2 am, Aarya
Samir: omg did Mr. Forrester finally admit Felicity was right about quantum physics?
Aarya: EVEN BETTER
Lara: Aarya if this isnât genuinely life-changing Iâm kicking you out of this group chat
Aarya: Oscar and Felicity got married
Thea: đđ very funny no seriously what happened
Aarya: No Iâm dead serious Felicity literally just texted me
Samir: WHAT NO WAY HOW??? THEY GRADUATED LIKE 3 WEEKS AGO??
Aarya: She sent me a picture of the certificate They legit got married YESTERDAY
Jian: Oscar? Like Oscar PIASTRI? our Oscar? Oscar âI once put almond milk in bĂŠchamel sauceâ Piastri??
Aarya: YES THAT OSCAR OUR OSCAR FELICITYâS OSCAR
Lara: hang on⌠I thought they were joking about Vegas???
Samir: wait so that entire convo about Elvis marrying them at a drive-thru chapel was serious? bc I laughed for a week about that
Aarya: not Elvis (sadly) but yes, very real, very married she sent me a selfie sheâs wearing Oscarâs hoodie over her wedding dress
Thea: Omg of course she is She probably married him for unlimited hoodie access
Lara: this tracks tbh they graduated early bc they were bored of A-levels got married early bc they were bored of being the smartest teenagers in Britain
Samir: honestly if they werenât disgustingly cute Iâd be so annoyed rn like how do you top getting MARRIED at 18??
Jian: âoh what did you do over summer?â âjust got married, no biggieâ â Oscar, probably
Thea: Jian, remember when you thought you had a shot with Felicity for exactly 12 minutes in Year 8 đđ
Jian: STOP THAT NEVER HAPPENED IT WAS TEN MINUTES MAX
Aarya: anyway, Felicity wanted me to tell you guys bc we are âOscar-and-Felicity-certified not-annoying peopleâ
Lara: thatâs genuinely the nicest thing sheâs ever said about us Iâm touched
Jian: same but also still processing that Oscar âlet me just casually carry my wife-to-be across campusâ Piastri is an actual husband now
Thea: do we call Felicity Mrs. Piastri now??? or do we call Oscar Mr. Leong bc thatâs actually hilarious
Samir: I vote Mr. Leong
Aarya: itâs Mrs. Piastri actually Felicity said so herself and she sounded very smug about it
Lara: OF COURSE SHE DID Oscarâs probably already changed all his racing gear to say âProperty of Felicity Piastriâ anyway
Samir: ok but imagine their babies tiny little brilliant creatures raised on soba noodles and karting strategies
Thea: theyâre probably already planning their kidsâ GCSEs as we speak
Aarya: honestly wouldnât put it past them
Jian: this group chat is now dedicated to tracking Oscar and Felicityâs completely ridiculous married life all in favour say aye
Samir: AYE Lara: AYE Thea: AYE Aarya: AYE
Samir: itâs unanimous long live the Piastris â¨đâ¨
#formula 1#f1 fanfiction#formula 1 fanfiction#f1 smau#f1 x reader#formula 1 x reader#f1 grid x reader#f1 grid fanfiction#oscar piastri fanfic#oscar piastri#Oscar Piastri fic#oscar piastri x reader#oscar piastri imagine#op81 fic#op81 imagine
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