#nicky will say fuck you and then want a kiss goodnight

[leafwyrm]

Honestly, Nicky Nelson is my favorite. He's a little boy who's like 6 years old, and he's just right about everything. He says fuck. What an icon

[yourimagines]

hii can you do a nate or nick Diaz smutt where the reader starts touching herself in front of them/ turns into a smutt and yeah yk you complete the rest!

I hope this is what you wanted, if not please let me know, I’ll write you another one

Needy

* English is not my first language I apologise

* Gif in not mine

* Triggers: 18+, very smutty, kinks, Swearing and Fluff

Y/n POV

It was a long dreadful day today at work and I was exhausted. Nick whoever had a relaxed day, did some chores in our house and smoked a bit. “I’m going to bed, I’m tired.” I said and stood up, Nick hummed and I gave him a kiss on his cheek. “Goodnight.” “Goodnight baby.” He playfully slapped my ass as I walked away. ‘Cheeky little guy.’ I went upstairs and changed myself into something more comfy and brushed my teeth. I looked at myself in the mirror and saw how really tired I looked, dark circles around my eyes, eyes looked a bit droopy and my skin was a bit pale. ‘Man I look ugly as fuck.’ I washed my face with lukewarm water and did a little bit of skin care.

I crawled in our bed and got comfy under the covers. ‘Finally.’ I closed my eyes and tried to fall asleep, I fell half asleep, floating between consciousness and a dream, a wet dream to be precise. I woke up and groaned as I felt my damped panties. ‘Now I can’t even sleep at all..’ I was getting frustrated. I’m not only tired but horny as well now. ‘Maybe he can help you out.’ I stared into the darkness of the room and listened very carefully if Nick was close by, in the very quiet background I heard him walking around, that means he’s still downstairs. “Ugh…” I flipped myself over to my back and started to stimulate myself even more. My fingers slowly moving around my wet folds and I moved one leg a bit upward to make some room. My lay my head back and slid a finger in, my mind drifted away from my surroundings and the only thing I saw was Nick. “Oh fuck.” I softly said as my hips slowly started to move.

Nick POV

I locked the doors and walked upstairs to the bathroom, getting myself ready for bed. I walked to the bathroom and brushed my teeth, looking at myself in the mirror. My eyes were red from smoking, I looked a bit pale but overall not too bad. I spit out my saliva and washed my face with water. As I was drying my face I heard a soft moan coming from the bedroom. ‘Y/n.’ My dick immediately reacted to that particularly sound and got hard. I left the bathroom and opened slowly our bedroom door, she was lying in the dark, her legs spread open, softly moaning my name. “Nick…” she moans with her eyes closed. Fingers moving in and out her wet pussy. My pants got tighter and I tiptoed closer, just looking at her. ‘Fuck…this is hot.’

“Baby.” I whispered carefully, not wanting her to scare her. Her eyes opened and she smiles, her cheeks turning a bit rosy. “Nicky…” she whines out. “Yeah baby, I’m here.” I unbuckled my belt and pulled my jeans out, I kicked them away and pulled my hoodie over my head and thrown it to the side. She was looking at me, still touching herself. “Can I help you out?” She nods and I joined her in bed, hovering over her body. “Nick.” She says as I gently pulled her fingers out of her and brought them to my mouth, licking them clean. “Are you bit needy today baby?” She nods and I gently rubbed her clit, a small whiny moan escaped from her mouth. “That’s it baby, daddy is here.”

She was already a mess underneath me, tired but needy. Her pussy started to squeeze around my fingers and before she hit her high I pulled them out. A frustrated whine escaped from her and I caressed her face with my other hand. “Sssh, it’s okay baby. Daddy is here to help you out.” I grabbed my hard dick out of my shorts and stroked it a few times before entering my way in her. A small gasp came from her and I carefully moved, she was tight, like always. “Nick…please. You’re so big.” Her small hands lay on my chest, trying to hold me back. “I know baby, I’ll be careful.” I slowly moved and pulled her shirt over her head, revealing her chest. Two beautiful tits on display, my hand went up and squeezed them softly. “Fuck..you’re so hot.”

I was groping her tits and I felt her pussy getting used to my size. “Please fuck me..” her voice sounded small and helpless. “I’ll fuck you baby.” I grabbed her by her hips and picked up the pace. Her tits started to jiggle and tiny moans escaped from her. She was looking at me with her tired eyes, closing them now and then. “You’re tired baby?” She nods, trying her best to keep awake. “It’s okay baby, daddy takes care of you.” I moved forward, laying my head next to hers. Her small hands came up to my shoulders, grabbing me. “Daddy.” She moans softly against my ear. She moved her legs up and wrapped them around me, causing me to go deeper. I hit her sweet spot and she started to moan softly every time I hit that sweet spot of hers. “Fuck..you’re so good to me baby.” I started to growl and moan as I felt her pussy started to squeeze me. “I’m coming…” I kissed her shoulder and she buckled her hips up and tiredly came. “Daddy….” She tiredly moans. “Let it all out baby, daddy got you.” One of her legs trembled and I started to move a bit sloppier as my cum dripped inside of her as I just came myself.

I got up and went to the bathroom to get a washcloth to clean her up. I cleaned her up and join her again in bed. She was dead asleep, I pulled her closer to my chest and she whines a bit. “It’s okay baby, it’s me.” I kissed her head and caressed her back, she relaxed against my chest and her soft breathing was filling the quiet room. “I love you so much baby.” I held her close and watched her sleeping peacefully in my arms till tiredness came and I fell asleep by myself.

[petals42]

The Count (the old guard, joe/nicky)

okay, I have only two headcanons so far for The Old Guard and I was going to try to work them both into fic BUT just in case I don’t, here's one of them:

Joe and Nicky try to keep their death count even.

After hearing that they eventually can die, joe and nicky have an almost superstitious practice of trying to make sure that they die the same amount of times. Sometimes this means one literally throwing himself in front of the other so that they take the bullet and do the death. Sometimes it means purposefully lowering your weapon at a certain time. It always means keeping count of how many times you die. And how many times the other person dies. And comparing afterwards.

Sometimes they check in mid-battle, mid-situation; more often they wait until after. After the blood and the extraction and it’s usually when they are home and they aren’t embarrassed of it, not really, this obsessive counting and matching, but usually, usually, they wait until it is just the two of them again. Until they are somewhere soft and quiet and--

“Six,” Nicky says as he reaches under the hem of Joe’s shirt to help him pull it off. The action isn’t a prelude to anything, they are too tired for that, it’s just that Joe had been stabbed in the shoulder and though the wound isn’t there, even after a thousand years, Nicky still assumes that sometimes Joe must be sore from the injury. 

It’s not a prelude, but he drops a kiss close to where he thinks the wound was anyway.

“Seven,” Joe replies, more a grunt than anything as he reaches for Nicky’s belt. Their clothes are clean, it’s been days since the raid, but it will be nice to get out of them anyway. 

Nicky sighs to himself, more in annoyance than anything else. The sheets are clean and the floor is carpet; they’ll have to do this in the bathroom. And the bathroom is one of those modern all-white things and he’s not sure they have bleach on hand. If only pills and poison didn’t take so long and hurt so much.

“We could--” And there’s a hesitation that means Joe is going to argue against it; as he does sometimes. Only when it’s Nicky’s turn, of course; but Nicky shoots him a glare. They’ve had this argument before. He’s not having it again. Joe’s throat clicks as he swallows one word and spits out another “--go outside. Less clean up.”

“Then we’d have to put clothes on again,” Nicky replies. “And someone might see.” He steps out of his pants on the way, grabbing Joe’s gun from the bedside table. He moves quickly. He wants to get to bed. 

He settles in the tub and blinks when Joe follows him. Then smiles. It’s something he loves about Joe; that he can still never quite tell when Joe is going to let Nicky handle it himself and when he is going to come watch him. It seems to be a 50-50 shot. Sometimes Joe can’t do it, can’t make himself hurt Nicky again, will only burst in after he hears the gunshot, while other times--

“I love you,” Joe says softly, taking the gun, and it’s in a language Nicky doesn’t need to identify because he knows those words in all of them. And then he’s lowering his head for a kiss and Nicky raises his chin and--

The shot hits him in the heart but he doesn’t feel the pain. Or if he does, he doesn’t remember. 

What he remembers is Joe already wiping the blood from his chest with a warm towel as he wakes.

Usually they do it when they’re alone. It’s not peaceful, but it’s calm and they clean up and run hands over blessedly unbroken skin and hold each other and it’s superstitious and illogical and maybe it’s not even safe but it’s… it’s better than the alternative. 

Of course, now with Nile around and Andy… Andy again, they are a team like they haven’t been for decades. There’s less and less splitting up after missions, more and more time spent sharing rooms or apartments and it’s not a secret, this thing they do, but it is private. 

Until it isn’t.

It had been a hard mission. Hard because innocent people died and hard because even the people they were fighting against didn’t seem evil, because the desperation in their eyes was obvious and it was the right thing to do, maybe, but it felt hard. And it was hard because it was long. The intel they had wasn’t perfect and all four of them had died twice before even breaching the compound and Nicky had gotten cut off somehow and pinned down for almost twenty minutes before managing to fight his way out and even Andy had looked tired of it all before the end. It was a firefight that felt more like a battle, seventy two hours getting in, almost as many getting out and--

It was just hard. Nile let the others set up camp, opting to dig the latrine and daydreamed about getting back to some form of civilization where there was running water and a shower. Andy said she could have someone out to pick them up by tomorrow or the next day at the latest but Nile knows that just means more bumpy travel for a few hours. Or longer depending on who Andy gets to come out here.

She steps back towards the fire and sees that everyone must be feeling the same as her. Andy is half-heartedly chewing a granola bar, looking as if each bite has to be forced down, and Nicky is already asleep, passed out facing away from the fire so that Joe’s back will be warmed when he inevitably curls around him. Only Joe is still moving, adding to the pile of wood near the fire so it will be easy to keep going in the night and then opening a duffel to grab a blanket to drape over Nicky and then digging through another duffel to grab something else that he stuffs into the waistband of his pants and Nile has just enough time to assume to herself that it must be some sort of food before she is flopping into her own sleeping bag, eyes already sliding closed. 

She sits up only to move a rock out from under her back and opens her mouth only to say goodnight.

That’s when she sees Joe lean down to press a kiss to Nicky’s temple, but instead of laying down next to him, he is rising and moving away from camp, away from the latrine, and she opens her mouth to tell him he’s going the wrong way.

“Let him go,” Andy says quietly. “He’ll be fine.”

Nile frowns at her, but her brain is a bit too fuzzy for questions. She mentally shrugs and curls up.

And shoots up as she hears the unmistakable sound of a gunshot nearby. Muffled by a silencer, obviously, faint enough that Nicky doesn’t stir, but it sounds like it came from the direction that Joe just went and she flings her arm out next to her to find her gun. Andy will be silently kicking Nicky awake and they’ll regret it, whichever idiot who managed to survive the compound and follow them here.

“Hey.” Andy’s whisper cuts through her panic nicely. Nile turns, ready to follow Andy’s lead. “Hey, it’s okay.” She is still sitting. She has not reached for a weapon. She is not waking up Nicky.

“What?” Nile says, keeping her voice low only so they don’t give away their position. “Andy that was a--”

“A gun, I know,” Andy says with a wry twist of her mouth. “It’s okay. No one’s coming to hurt us.”

“Joe’s out there!” Nile says, fighting to keep her voice low. Out there and if he’s shooting at something, that must mean-- “We have to go help him!”

“He’s not in danger,” Andy says. Nile tries not to sputter at her. Obviously he’s not in danger, he’s freaking immortal, they all are, but that doesn’t mean they should just let him fight this battle alone. That’s not how--

Another shot has her kicking her feet out from her sleeping bag. This one is even fainter as if Joe is moving away from them. Enough is enough. She doesn’t know what Andy is playing at but this is ridiculous.

“Don’t,” Andy says sharply and then sighs. “He’s-- they-- him and Nicky, they-- They have this thing.”

Nile stops moving. If only because Andy sounds the particular brand of annoyed and exhausted and regretful that means she is about to actually give up a secret. 

“What?” Nile says when Andy’s silence lengthens. 

“They try to stay even,” Andy finally replies. She looks at Nile as if Nile is supposed to know what that means. Nile’s face must ask the question for her. “With their… deaths. They try to make sure they have the same number so that if…”

She fades out. Nile’s brain finally catches on. So that if their final death is no more than a numbers game, they will be together. 

“That’s…” Nile doesn’t realize she starts the sentence aloud and then doesn’t know how to finish it. Insane? Stupid? Romantic? Not how that works? How does she know how any of it works anyway, maybe that is how it works, maybe it is just some number that you hit and-- but, fuck, what if it’s not a number and it’s just random and Joe kills himself out there.

“It’s what they do,” Andy says. Only the tightness around her eyes reveals her true feelings. “They won’t stop.”

Nile blinks. It… she… Nicky had been pinned down today for almost twenty minutes. Who knows…

Another shot rings through the clearing.

Nile flinches.

“Go to sleep,” Andy tells her. “I’ll stay up.”

It’s an order and Nile lays back down for lack of anything better to do. 

But she doesn’t fall asleep. She lies awake and she waits and counts as eight gunshots crack through the night. 

Nicky is furious the next day. More angry than Nile’s ever seen him and Andy says nothing, but she gives the two men a wide berth, sending first herself ahead as a scout and than Nile head as a second scout and--

“That’s not how we do things,” Nicky hisses as both women fade into the trees. He comes to a stop and turns to face Joe fully for the first time since this morning. Since he had woken to see the silencer still attached to Joe’s gun and felt the tacky blood still plastered to the back of his head and realized what Joe had done last night. “How could you--”

He looks away from Joe then. Looks away and unbidden, his mind plays it out. If Joe had permanently died and Nicky wasn’t there. He would’ve woken up alone, back cold despite the fire, and no one would have known where to look at first, but they would have followed his tracks easily enough and he would have run only to see Joe’s body, already cold and damaged and--

He shudders. And then flinches as Joe’s hand reaches for his face.

For the first time in many years, Nicky slaps it away. 

“I can’t believe you would do that to me,” he says and his eyes are filled with tears that he tries to stop from falling. It would be one thing for it to happen in battle, another if this theory of theirs was wrong, if it resulted in something horrific, but to not be there.

To not be there would be worse than death itself. 

And Joe knows that. And the fact that he still-- he still-- Nicky doesn’t know what his face does. Doesn’t know how to continue. 

“That is not how we do this.”

“I know,” Joe says. “I know, Nicky, I’m so-- I’m sorry. I just--”

He takes a breath then and it’s his turn to glance away. “You were gone so long where I couldn’t see you. And I couldn’t get to you. And I--”

His throat closes and Nicky opens his mouth to tell Joe that that is exactly what Joe had done to him, worse because he was not in battle, he was sleeping and unaware, but Joe looks back at him in that moment and his eyes are red and his voice is raw and desperate.

“I had to know the count was right, Nicolo.” It’s their old blench of Italian and Arabic; the language they created together at the beginning. “I had to make them match before I could sleep in case we were attacked in the night or something in you was still healing. Or not healing. You fell asleep so fast, and so easily, and you had been gone so long that I- I-”

He stops that and his hand makes an aborted motion towards Nicky’s face again before dropping to his side. “I’m sorry, my love. Truely.”

His eyes flick to the ground and then to Nicky’s face and Nicky is angry enough still to make him wait for one heartbeat, two, and then--

He grabs Joe’s face with both his hands, a touch too firmly to be called gentle.

“Never again, Yusuf.” Joe’s hands lift to curl around Nicky’s wrists and press them more firmly together. “You will not do that to me again.”

“I-” Joe starts and maybe he was going to say “I won’t” or maybe “I promise” or maybe the sound wasn’t I- at all but Nicky doesn’t give him the chance. He presses their mouths together and pours his anger into that, and his hurt too and desperation and fear and love and he knows Joe won’t do it again. Knows because Joe is kissing him the same way. 

His left hand drops to Joe’s shoulders to pull him closer, ever closer, and his right trails to where he can feel the blood on the back of Joe’s head and it’s blood, but it’s dried, dried and the skull is whole and they are both wonderfully, wonderfully alive and for now, that is enough.

They will handle the rest of it together. 

[enamoured-x]

can you do a nick amaro imagine with the smut prompts 7, 11, 21, 26, and 40. thank you so much! i love your writing!!

I didn’t fit in the last prompt because this ended up being pretty angsty at first... but I really really love it. This made me miss the hell out of Nick. Anyways, I hope you like it! (gif not mine)

Warnings: NSFW

Nick had been terribly busy at work lately. He’d come home late and even the days he could get off early, he’d just work from home. You weren’t too worried since he had gotten better at pacing himself and making sure to take breaks and not run himself to the ground. He was however, not good at putting time aside for other things. Like you. Nick hadn't touched you all month, just kissed you goodnight and good morning. Or hugs when he got home from a long day. But nothing more than that and you were growing desperate. You knew you were being needy, you knew for some a month was nothing. But for you and Nick, a month was excruciatingly long. You were used to going at it nearly everyday. So a month without Nick, without a release by his hands, well it was taking a toll on you. 

It was late in the afternoon, Nick had the day off but of course he was making calls and looking over evidence. You were simply watching him from where you laid sprawled on the couch watching tv. You kept looking over at him at the kitchen table. His brows furrowed, pink lips pursed. You thought you were finally able to have him all to yourself today but that went out the window the minute he pulled out file after file after you had finished eating lunch. He had been at it for three hours and you were beginning to grow bored. You were also horny, just as you had been all month. 

He didn’t even look your way when you sighed, so you made it a point to do it again. Nothing. You sighed again, nothing. Again, still nothing. You exaggerated it even more and finally he slowly dragged his eyes to you from his paper, brows raised. 

“Oh, hi, didn’t think you knew that I was here.” You said. He gave you a pointed look and then his attention went back to the papers. 

“Did you actually need something or were you just trying to get my attention?” He asked, moving around papers. 

“I need your attention.” He snorted and you frowned. 

“Glad my loneliness is funny to you.” There was no humor in your voice now. He recognized this and looked over again. 

He sighed, “come here.” You got up from the couch to walk over to him. Once you were at his side he brought you down to his level to place a kiss on your lips. Nothing too naughty, just a plain old simple kiss. You would still take it. 

“Look, I just need to make a few more calls and then I’m all yours.” You huffed out a laugh. You should’ve known he was just trying to give you a little something so you would stop whining. 

Before he knew what was going on, you snatched his phone off the table and walked away. 

“Hey, sweetheart, come on. Give it back.” He got up from the chair. You couldn’t help but but be bitter that he got out of the chair for his phone but not for you. 

“Why? Texting other women?” You knew Nick would never cheat but you liked to give him a hard time, he deserved it. Especially now. 

“No, look through it all you want but I need it back.” You ignored him and walked into your bedroom. He followed. You laid down on the bed and opened his phone, immediately opening up a game Zara had downloaded on it. The music of the game filled the room.

“Are you serious right now? Quit messing around, I have work to do.” You sat up but started playing the game. 

“You’re off today.” You said as you tried to get the monkey jumping from one tree to another.

“I still have a case. Give me my phone.” He reached his hand out. You sighed and slid off the bed, walking over to him. 

“You want me to give you back your phone?” You asked and then ran past him, “make me!” 

You heard Nick swear under his breath and then follow after you. You ran to the living room and stood behind the couch, he now stood on the other end. 

“This isn’t a damn game.”

“Aw, but, Nicky, you love games. First one to make a noise loses? You love that game because you know I lose every time because I just can’t help myself.” You bit your lip at the memory of the last time you and Nick agreed to it. You had lost as soon as he started to eat you out. You were getting yourself worked up from the memory but Nick didn’t seem phased at all.

“So that’s what this is about? You’re horny? I don’t have time for this.” He shook his head and tried to come around the couch but you simply went around too. His jaw clenched and he sighed. 

“You don’t have time for me?” You asked carefully. 

“I don’t have time to fuck you every time you’re begging for it.” He got louder as he said the words. They only stung because you knew he was trying to hurt you, trying to humiliate you for wanting him. You shook your head and threw his phone on the couch. 

“Maybe I’ll just go find someone who does have the time.” You walked down the hall, wanting to go back to your bedroom. You thought maybe he’d give in at your little game. But to no avail. You felt defeated, and just...sad. Sure you wanted the sex but you just wanted him to pay attention to you for one god damn minute. 

“What the hell did you just say?” Nick asked and then came right after you, following you back into the bedroom.

“You heard me.” You wouldn’t actually do it. You loved Nick more than life itself but if this was going to continue, where did that leave your relationship? 

“So because I won’t fuck you you’re going to go cheat on me? Are you that desperate?” You turned around to face him.

“You’ve barely even looked at me this month.” You crossed your arms. 

“Oh my god. You know I have other important things to worry about than you, right?” Your brows rose as you took in his words.

“Sorry, don’t let me stand in your fucking way. I’m not just something you can put on the back burner and come back to whenever you feel like. If you have other shit on your mind and have no room for me, than what the fuck am I even doing here?” Maybe this stemmed from more than just this one incident. Nick was notorious for honing in on his work or family problems and pushing you to the side just to be background noise. Like working while having the tv on, you knew it was there but you don’t look up till hours later or till something catches your attention. 

“That’s not what this is. You’re making a big deal out of nothing.” He ran his hand through his hair, shaking his head. 

“You didn’t answer my question. What the fuck am I doing here?” You lifted your arms, pleading. 

“You’re here because you love me and I love you. You know that.”

“Do I? Because it doesn’t feel like it.” His face turned solemn, no doubt at the realization that you weren’t messing around when you essentially suggested that you were going to leave. 

“You have to know that I love you. I love you like crazy.” He grabbed your arms in his hands. 

“You don’t yank someone back and forth like this when you love them.” Your heart was heavy. This conversation had been a long time coming. 

“I…I’m not trying to. That’s not what…” You say nothing, just waiting for him to find his words. 

“I’m sorry that I’ve been doing that. It was never my intention to treat you like that. I don’t mean to push you to the side, I didn’t even know I’ve been doing it.”

“Because I’m always here waiting like it never happened.” He nodded at your words and swallowed. 

“Please, I’ll fix this. I’ll do better, I swear I will. I love you.” He grabbed your face in his hands. 

“I love you.” He repeated. 

“Then show me.” You needed him. You needed his hands roaming your body and his mouth on yours. You needed to feel him again. There was still more to talk about but right now you just needed him.

He wasted no time pressing his lips to yours. It was harsh and rough, your lips bound to be swollen. He backed you up against the bed and that’s when you started pulling off clothes, both yours and his. 

“No, like this, come here.” He said before you could lay down on the bed. He sat down against the headboard, legs open for you to sit against his back. You were confused but did as he said, having no doubt he’d give you what you needed. He brought you to lean back against his chest and then he opened your legs and put his legs over yours to keep them open. You whimpered at the cool air meeting your center and at his hard member against your back.

“I’m gonna make you feel so good, baby.” His hands slid up from your stomach to your breasts, taking them into each hand, massaging them. You moaned as he pinched your nipples, playing with the buds. You felt yourself getting wet embarrassingly fast. You couldn't help yourself though, it had been a month. 

“Mmm, I love having you like this.” He pulled your head back to rest against his chest, allowing for him to start playfully nipping at your neck. 

“I’m sorry I haven’t been showing you how much I fucking adore you. You’re so damn gorgeous. I’m an idiot.” You couldn’t argue there. 

He continued his ministrations with one hand, slowly dragging his other hand down your stomach and to the place you needed him most. He didn’t tease, fingers gliding through your folds. 

“Oh, Nick.” you bucked into his touch. 

“I didn’t know you were so sensitive.” You usually weren’t right off the bat like this, but it had been awhile since it had been his hands down there instead of yours. 

“It’s been awhile.” He tensed at your words but it was gone in an instant. 

“Never again.” He promised. His fingers rubbed your clit, making you gasp. He then started to tease your entrance before sliding in a finger, and then another. 

“Nick! Yes, just like that.” You cried out as his thumb brushed against your clit as he curled his fingers inside of you. You couldn’t control your hips very well as you started rolling them. He didn’t falter, his thumb swiping across your clit faster and faster, bringing you closer to that release you so desperately craved. 

“I want you to come on my fingers. And then I’m gonna make love to you. Gonna make you feel good, preciosa.” You whined at his words, wanting everything he was saying and realizing that you were gonna get it. 

He continued to alternate rolling your nipples in between his fingers. Pinching hard, knowing just how you liked them played with. He licked up your neck and then nibbled on your ear. You were slowly coming undone. You were a knot, tightly tied but slowly being pulled apart. 

“Come on my fingers. Come and I’ll give you what you want.” You were done for. His fingers still brushed against your clit as you arched your back and caved in. The knot finally snapped as it came undone. He drew out your orgasm as he continued his assault on your center. Eventually, you finally let out a breath as the feeling washed away, relief at your release taking over. He pulled his hand away and sucked his fingers into his mouth. 

“Damn, always so sweet.” Is all he said before he was moving you. He gently placed you on the bed to his right, untangling his legs from yours. Then he turned you so you were laying on your side. You let him move you. He pressed right up against your back.

“Want you like this. Want to hold you while I’m inside you.” You moaned at his words. His length was poking you in the ass and you felt him stroking himself a few times before lining himself up with your entrance. 

“Nick, please.” You pleaded, needing him inside you already. You felt that same rope, coiling back into a knot. Calling you to untangle it again.

Nick slowly pushed himself inside you, not stopping until he was all the way in. You were throbbing and you knew he felt it as he bit your shoulder. 

“Fuck, so tight.” He slid his arm under your neck to then wrap it around your chest, placing his other arm around your stomach to bring you back into him as he started thrusting. This new position had you tasting heaven. Flushed skin against skin as he held you in his arms. As he thrusted inside you, pushing you towards another release. 

“God, Nick. You feel so good. Fuck, it’s so good.” You whimpered as he ground into you. 

“Your pussy feels so good around my cock. Want you to come again for me, sweetheart.” You held on tightly to his arms, thrusting your hips back into him. 

“Need you to come inside me.” Your words had him nipping at your shoulders and placing sloppy wet kisses there and to your neck. 

You were a moaning mess at each roll of his hips, at each lick to your skin. You were consumed with love, consumed by him. You felt so full of him and it felt like home. You missed it something terrible. Not just this sinfully sweet pleasure washing through you like waves, but his hands on you, letting you know he was there and he was with you. He was focused on you. 

“Nick…” You started to warn him as you felt that coil tighten in your lower belly. 

“I know, baby. Me too.” The moment he slid his fingers down to press on your clit, your climax slammed against you. You squeezed around him as your orgasm took over your body and he cursed before he was yelling and spilling into you. His thrusts working you both through the aftermath. Your head was fuzzy when you came down, already half asleep. 

“It’s okay. Rest, my love.” He didn’t make a move to pull away, only to wrap the covers around you both, him still inside you. 

“I love you.” Is the last thing you heard before you succumbed to the sleep dragging you under. You were content and safe in Nick’s arms. You felt at peace again and you knew it would last this time. 

[artificialqueens]

Girl I Met On The Internet, 2/? (Crystal x Gigi) - Strawberry

a/n: aaaa i’m so glad everyone liked the first chapter! i think this story will end up staying focused on gigi and crystal for the most part, but there is some (one sided) jankie in this chapter if you’re into that! also: just in case no one got the reference, the nickname crystal gives gigi, ‘georgia rose’,comes from the 1d lyrics “Said her name was georgia rose, and her daddy was a dentist” from their song ‘best song ever’!

gigi: are u okay :( ily crystal

crystal: yeah i just got picked on by this cheerleader that doesnt like me

Technically, she wasn’t lying. Crystal didn’t think it was too bad, considering she really only ever saw Dahlia in history class, but she still made it her mission to make that 45 minutes rough for Crystal whenever possible. This time it was pushing all of Crystal’s belongings off of her desk while she was leaving.

gigi: fuck. im sorry. 

crystal: it’s fine dskjdshjgkjf i wish all cheerleaders could take notes from you and jan

gigi: yaaas me and jan invented being nice

gigi: but i was wondering if maybe you could teach me about one direction later tonight?

Crystal had tried to convince the group earlier in the week that One Direction was the best boy band ever, and had only managed to get Jan to agree. She was glad that Gigi had finally come to her senses.

crystal: finally changing your mind? amazayn!

gigi: i regret asking now. take that pun back to 2011!!!!

The rest of the day went as normal. The chat was pretty active, but eventually died down at the end of the school day. Everyone seemed to have plans; Jan was studying, Jaida was going out to hang with friends, Nicky was sleeping, and Heidi was starting a new challenge on the Sims. It appeared to be just her and Gigi, alone in the group chat. 

Crystal decided to message Gigi privately, not wanting the rest of the girls to see her go into full stan mode. If someone asked Crystal about her interests, she could go hours before thinking of stopping herself.

crystal: ok miss gigi are you ready for your 1d crash course?

Crystal told Gigi everything she wanted to know and even more. A history of how they got together, way too much information on each of the five boys, telling her the best songs on each album, and making sure that Gigi knew ‘Midnight Memories’ was their best album. 

gigi: but ur @ is dedicated to made in the am?? fraud!

crystal: HELPFDFHBJ

crystal: mmcrystal sounds weird… like no thanks 

gigi: that was very interesting.. i’ll def listen to midnight memories in the morning <3

crystal: YAY! gigi 1d stan finally

gigi: no promises! :)

Crystal didn’t respond to that, not really knowing what to talk about now. Having a group of friends helped her be less awkward, but it definitely didn’t fix that problem completely. 

gigi: do u wanna play 21 questions or something?? to get to know eachother better???

Of course, Crystal jumped at the chance to get to know the other girl better. It started very innocently, asking about favorite colors and foods. Gigi quickly changed that.

gigi: uhh… have u ever kissed a girl?

crystal: sadly no.. my state is full of straight people

gigi: same.. ur turn

crystal: this feels awkward to ask but uhhh….

As soon as she hits send, she instantly regrets it. She backtracks what she had originally typed, desperately trying to come up with another question. Crystal was not able to think of anything else.

gigi: ????

“I guess I’ll have to do it,” Crystal says, talking to absolutely no one. She types it out again, looking away from her phone as she blindly tried to hit the send button, like it would help her situation be any less flustering for her.

crystal: how long have you and nicky been dating?

Would Gigi find it weird that she asked? Gigi was the one who brought up kissing girls, not Crystal, so it would be fine. Right?

gigi: CRYSTAL WHATBDGNHSDMFD

gigi: nicky and i are not dating omg im single

gigi: she’s like my sister. plus i would never do long distance

Crystal was so embarrassed. She was relieved this conversation was taking place through a screen, so Gigi wouldn’t see her blushing face. 

She was pleased that she was wrong about the two girls, but Gigi’s answer was upsetting to her.

They asked a few more personal questions before Gigi started asking Crystal would you rather questions instead. Crystal’s favorite out of them was if she would rather get a mullet or dress like a clown every day for the rest of her high school career. The answer was both, obviously. 

They spent the rest of the night sending each other stupid questions, giggling to themselves. The later it got, the more Gigi would flirt with her. At least Crystal thought it was flirting.

gigi: it’s really late and i have a test tomorrow so im gonna go to sleep. goodnight, babe

Gigi always would say ‘goodnight, bitch’, and this made Crystal even more confused. The ongoing joke that lesbians had the hardest time telling if a girl is into them or not was one of Crystal’s favorites, but now she couldn’t help but wonder if that was exactly what was happening to her. There was obviously a connection between them, but it was unclear to Crystal if it was just platonic. 

It didn’t hit her until later that night, while she was trying to fall asleep, but Crystal wasn’t entirely sure where Gigi lived. She knew they were in the same time zone, but wasn’t sure what state she was in. It was totally possible that Gigi lived in Missouri, but Crystal highly doubted it. Though Gigi obviously trusted Crystal enough to want to play 21 questions with her, she was still very private, and Crystal wasn’t too sure if Gigi would tell her what state she was in. 

Crystal fell asleep thinking about her highly unrealistic perfect world, where Gigi lived in Missouri and where Crystal wasn’t just another Nicky. 

-

Crystal got onto Twitter right after waking up the next morning, ready to ask Gigi if she happened to live in Missouri, but quickly got distracted with a very interesting conversation going on in the group chat.

jan!: now i may not be gay but i’m in love with a woman… 2 words jackie

jaida: i- that’s only one word

jan!: fuck

heidi: the way i can’t tell if you’re joking or not

jan!: the way i don’t think i am joking

gigi: YAAS about time u admitted that u like her

crystal: hold on i thought jan was straight?? who’s jackie???

nicky: do you really think a straight person would hang out with us?

crystal: good point 

jan!: I AM STRAIGHT! i think? i don’t know i’m so confused. 

heidi: jackie is jan’s local @ crystal

gigi: jan be like: im straight.

gigi: but also jan is like: wow jackie is so pretty and she’s so funny and smart i’m going to fail geometry so she can tutor me but no homo!

heidi: the delusion janice has…

jaida: not to be serious but if you think you like jackie, you probably aren’t straight baby. everyone else hush and let her talk

nicky: ^^ yeah jan what happened

jan!: first of all i did not fail geometry i just said we should study together so we did!!! and have been for months! but last night i couldn’t focus at all bc she’s so pretty all i wanted to do was k*ss her out of nowhere

In a way, Crystal could definitely relate. Gigi wasn’t her local, she still didn’t know what the girl looked like, but she still kind of wanted to kiss her. She couldn’t focus on anything besides Gigi sometimes, not like she would ever admit it. 

All of the girls had sent many comforting messages addressed to Jan, saying that it was okay, and she has all the time she needs to figure out her feelings. Afterwards, everyone had gone back to being playful. Gigi also tried to convince her to make a move on Jackie, which Jan refused.

gigi: if u talk to her u guys can get married <3

crystal: gigi you’re so stupid i love it

jan!: omg did someone say stupid love??? stream! 

gigi: crystal back me up :(

crystal: i might’ve found out who jackie is only 10 minutes ago but i will cry if jan doesn’t talk to her right now

jan!: better start crying bc i dont think i can even look at her now

jaida: that’s not saying much at all. you cried the other day bc gigi sent a pic of her dog

crystal: I AM A NANCY STAN FIRST AND A HUMAN SECOND!!

Crystal knew she looked like an idiot, walking to her locker with her eyes glued to her phone and a dopey smile on her face but she couldn’t care less.

-

The day actually went well for Crystal. The highlight of her day was finding out that the story she wrote for her creative writing class had gotten the highest grade out of everyone in the class, earning her a piece of candy. 

crystal: just got candy and a 99% on my story for class… i truly have the mind of a mastermind

jaida: beauty and intelligence in one combined!

Navigating through the halls was much more difficult when your eyes are glued to your phone, but replying to a meme Jaida sent seemed much more appealing to Crystal than getting to her seventh period without worrying about bumping into someone.  And bumping into someone, she did.

“What the actual fuck, weirdo?” Dahlia yelped, looking extremely offended, “Get off of your sad, cracked phone and watch where your dumb ass is going.”

Crystal just stared at her, frozen in fear. Dahlia taunted her daily, but this was very different from how she usually acts towards her. It was quite terrifying. 

“I swear to God, if you ever look at me, let alone fucking touch me again-” She continued, but before she could finish her statement, she was interrupted by her friend, Georgina running over and pulling her away. 

Crystal didn’t think Georgina shared Dahlia's hatred for her, and Crystal didn’t hate Georgina either. Georgina actually seemed very sweet besides the fact that she had never bothered to step in on the rare occasion Dahlia happened to target Crystal outside of class.

“Can you please leave her alone? We don’t have time for this.” Georgina groaned, looking back at Crystal, flashing her a quick smile, before turning around to escort Dahlia to what Crystal assumed was cheerleading practice.

“But she bumped into me!” Dahlia whined, not used to being interrupted like this.

“Really? Wow, funny. I don’t care.”

Once they were out of sight, Crystal was alone again. She pulled out her phone and went to check if anyone had said anything else in the chat; just Jan freaking out, because Jackie had smiled at her in the hallway.

heidi: everyone say i if you think jan should stop being a baby and ask jackie out

jaida: i

crystal: i

jan!: WTF

jan!: friendship ended with heidi, jaida and crystal. now nicky and gigi are my best friends

jaida: they would say i too if they were online and you know that

jan!: i don’t need friends! they disappoint me!

Crystal decided to not use her phone while she was walking home, not wanting to have a repeat of the Dahlia situation. Her after school routine changed a lot in the past week, making a rule to not check Twitter before completing her homework. Her Twitter addiction was getting worse, but since it was also causing her to be more productive with doing her homework, she saw no issues with it. Once she had finished, she picked up her phone to see that Gigi had messaged her less than a minute ago.

gigi: hey clown :) im done w practice

crystal: WHY AM I A CLOWNDFSHDM

gigi: u just have clown energy. i cant and wont explain 

crystal: honestly yeah i see it but can i at least be your clown wife or something

gigi: yeah <3 hey clown wife! i listened to most of midnight memories and it was really good! my fave song is u and i

If that’s not love, then what is? If that’s not friendship, then what is? Crystal had never been able to get anyone to listen to anything she recommended, ever. She was filled with glee, double tapping the message to heart it. It meant a lot to her.

crystal: YAYAYAYAYA im so glad but it looks so ugly when you spell it like that 

gigi: my fave song you and i* >:(

crystal: better 

gigi: if i have to stop spelling it as u to make you not divorce me i will

Crystal knew deep down it was just a joke, but it made her heart race. The feeling she got every time Gigi would flirt with her was very unfamiliar, but very nice. It didn’t help that Crystal thought ‘You and I’ was one of the most romantic songs One Direction had, she couldn’t help but make the fact Gigi liked it out of all of the other songs into something it was not.

This reminded her of her late night thoughts. She had completely forgotten to ask Gigi where she lived, but the idea didn’t seem the greatest now that she was fully awake. She was still curious though, so against her better judgement she asked, without a segway or anything.

crystal: i forgot to ask but what state do you live in? asking for science

gigi: oh i live in missouri

crystal: omg me too

gigi: i don’t wanna reveal where but this is amazing.. maybe we won’t have to break the distance at all <3

Pleased that she somehow got an answer, Crystal changed the conversation into a discussion of ‘Midnight Memories’, and if Gigi agreed with the opinions Crystal had shared the night before. She did, for the most part and before they knew it, it was time for Gigi to go sleep. Had they really talked all evening? 

gigi: i have to get up early so i need to go to sleep but im really glad jan added u to the gc

crystal: and im happy you asked me about one direction!

gigi: me too. ur cute when ur passionate. i hope we can continue to grow closer

crystal: i’d like that.

gigi: goodnight, my clown :)

crystal: goodnight, georgia rose

gigi: U DID NOT

gigi: my full name isnt even georgia and dad isnt even a dentist but i’ll allow it bc i know u think u invented comedy

gigi: ok gn now <33 luv u

crystal: gn!!! sleep well

Crystal wanted them to stay like this forever.

[znaeb]

Poor Planning // N.M. (Part 3; Final Part)

Nervous. That wasn’t the only word you could think of to explain how you felt, but it was definitely the most accurate. The butterflies in your stomach seemed to multiply as the day went on.

Nick was all over you the entire day. His hands found your hips no matter where you were or who was around, pretty much outing your entire thing to everyone, but you couldn’t even be mad about it. You loved having his attention.

Before the show that night the boys’ manager informed you all that you’d be staying in a hotel since it was one of the last shows of the tour. You were booked a separate room from the boys, and thoughts of you and Nick being completely alone swirled around in your head from the moment you heard that.

You, like any girl would, started preparing for the night early. Taking your sweet time in the shower to pamper yourself a bit and make sure everything was on point.

You blow dried your hair and put it in a cute curly half up hairstyle. You put on some light makeup then strolled into the main room of your suite to pick out a perfect outfit for the show.

You decided on a light blue bodycon dress with ultra thin straps, and then picked some nude lace-up platform heels. You looked and felt fabulous.

The boys’ manager came to your room to walk you to the car that was taking you to the show, the boys having gone ahead for sound-check and pre-show prep.

When you got to the venue you were lead to your seat in a reserved section off to the right side. You were almost glad that you weren’t front and center, knowing how crazy it could be up there.

When the lights went down you started getting excited, knowing that there was only a short minute until the boys took the stage.

When they came trotting onto the stage the fans started screaming so loudly that you found yourself cheering along, the adrenaline rushing through your body.

Even though you watched them all you watched Nick the closest, his dancing making you feel some type of way.

After the first song they took a minute while Brandon spoke to the crowd, you watched as Nick’s eyes scanned the faces in the audience and then landed on you. Your heart fluttering as a smile spread across his face. He bit his lower lip as he looked you up and down, his body language changing from care-free to I want you in a matter of seconds. Music began to play and you blushed as he threw you a small wink and bagan to sing along.

The rest of the night was like that, Nick throwing you seductive glances and sneakily making eye contact with you when doing suggestive dance moves.

When the show ended you made your way through the building, flashing your pass to the security team you made your way down the hallway towards the boys dressing room.

The sudden pull on your arm was unexpected, a little squeal leaving your mouth as you were yanked into a small side room. Your back was pushed against the door and finally you were face to face with Nick. His eyes caught yours for a brief second before he leaned in and began kissing your jaw, his hands wrapping around you and resting on your lower back.

“Oh my god you are so pretty.” He whispered softly, a small kiss following his words and landing just below your ear.

You reached up and threaded your fingers through his hair, scratching his scalp gently in a soothing manner.

“Thank you, Nicky.” You giggled as he pulled your body against his.

“Nicky? You givin’ me nicknames now, ma?” He chuckled and pinched your side, his big hands holding your hips securely.

“Yeah, I like it.” You spoke softly as he rested his forehead against yours, one of your hands resting against the side of his face.

“I like you.” He smiled big and shook his head as he realized how cheesy he sounded.

Your smile grew impossibly bigger, your thumb caressing his cheekbone as you admired his bashful face. Then, quietly, you whispered: “I like you too.”

———

You sat on the couch in the boys dressing room as you waited for them to change out of their performance clothes and shower. At one point you were by yourself in the room, using your phone to keep you entertained while you waited for them to come back.

After being alone for a little while you heard the door open and you glanced up to see Nick, hair wet, in a pair of basketball shorts and no shirt. A nervous feeling bubbled up inside of you and you quickly returned your eyes to you phone.

You resisted the urge to look at him as he walked around the couch and stood behind you. The smell of his bodywash encircling you and taking over your senses, making it nearly impossible to keep your eyes on your phone.

He brushed some of your hair off your neck and let his lips rest against your shoulder, his nose brushing against the side of your neck. You lifted your arm and placed a hand on his cheek.

“Hi.” You whispered against his cheek and placed a soft kiss there.

“Hey ma.” He whispered back and lifted his lips to meet yours, one of his hands holding your chin and turning your face to the side.

The kiss lasted for a few seconds before you heard the other boys making their way down the hallway. Nick pecked your lips one more time before he stood up and walked towards his bag to put on a shirt.

The boys entered the room and immediately made it loud and lively. You stood to hug them all and congratulate them on a great show.

A while later on the drive back to the hotel you sat between Nick and the car door, liking this arrangement because you could sneakily stick your hand under his arm and into his jacket pocket. When he felt you do this he gave you a cute little smile and lightly squeezed your arm with his.

Back at the hotel you all hung out in Brandon’s room for a few hours, watching a few movies and just spending time chilling.

After the end of the second movie it was nearing 1:00am, you weren’t tired yet but you were sick of waiting to be alone with Nick so you excused yourself to ‘go to bed’ and shot a glance at him as you bid the boys goodnight and left the room. You walked down the hall and unlocked your door, your phone going off in your hand as you walked inside.

Gimme 20 minutes.

You smiled at the message from Nick. You hurried into the bathroom to check your makeup and hair, then you refreshed your perfume before going back into the main room and sitting in one of the comfortable chairs there.

After only about 10 minutes you heard a knock on your door, you furrowed your eyebrows as you answered it, checking through the peephole to make sure it was actually Nick before opening the door.

“I thought you said like 20 min—” you were cut off by his lips crashing into yours. He walked you backwards into the room and kicked the door shut behind him.

“Couldn’t wait...” he spoke quickly so he could go back to kissing you, then added after a moment, “want you so bad...” You bit your lip trying to hold in a moan as he kissed down your neck.

“Oh...” the word was low and drawn out, your eyes falling shut at the feeling of his lips against your throat.

You both stumbled towards your room, hands fumbling with each other’s clothes. His shirt and shoes were abandoned on the floor in the foyer, your heels too.

He pulled down the zipper at the back of your dress, the now loose straps beginning to slip off your shoulders.

“Baby, please take this off.” He begged but made no move to try and take it off himself, making sure you were comfortable with everything that was happening.

You scrambled to pull the dress off, your lips catching his as you shimmied the fabric down your legs.

He pulled away and looked you up and down, his eyes lingering on the lacy bra you’d picked earlier. You leaned forward and began kissing down his chest, pulling him towards the bed by the waistband of his shorts.

You laid on your back on the bed. He crawled over you and kissed from the elastic band of your underwear up your body to your lips. His hands wrapping around your underwear and slowly pulling it down your legs.

“Lookatchu ma... fuck...” he groaned and slid a hand up the inside of your thigh, getting so close to the place you wanted him.

“Nick please...” you pleaded, one of your hands holding tightly onto his bicep.

His lips pulled up into a smirk as he slowly slid his hand closer to your center, teasing you by leaving wet kisses on the top of your thigh.

“What do you want me to do? C’mon baby, tell me what you want...” he kept kissing farther down your leg.

“Please touch me, please...” you moaned out, your breathing heavy and ragged.

He smirked again and finally finally touched your center, groaning at how wet you were. His fingers circled your clit slowly and your back arched against the mattress at the feeling, a whine pulling itself from your throat.

“Oh fuck, baby faster...” you clutched the sheets below you as his fingers sped up.

His fingers moved from your clit and ran them over your slit before sliding two inside you, his mouth then kissing down your stomach before meeting the throbbing bud. You moaned loudly at this, your body shaking as he carried on at a quick pace.

You came for the first time very quickly, barely able to keep your eyes open as you watched him slip his shorts and boxers off. He reached up and slid a hand under you, unhooking your bra and sliding the thin garment off of you.

He kissed your chest and pulled one of your hardening nipples between his teeth, swirling his tongue around it. You hummed as he let go and moved to the other one, his hand still rubbing between your legs slowly as he left hickeys on your breasts.

“Fuck me... fuck me so rough Nick.” You begged him, the needy feeling in your stomach was almost unbearable. You needed him inside of you.

He landed a firm smack on your backside, the sting making you moan out in pleasure. He began to circle his tip slowly around your opening, your muscles clenching in anticipation.

“Say please.” He said sternly, his eyes watching your face closely.

“Please Nick! Fuck, please I need you to fuck me so hard...” you pulled at his hair with one of your hands, the desperation in your voice making him even harder.

He gave your ass another solid slap as he thrust into you, his hips slamming into yours and causing you to practically scream in pleasure.

He pounded into you hard and fast, his strong movements making your head continuously bump into the headboard, but he felt so good that you didn’t care.

“Fuck! Don’t stop!” You yelled loudly, your nails scratching his back mercilessly, leaving long red lines behind, “I’m so close again!”

“Cum baby.” He ordered, those words alone being enough to push you over the edge.

You came first and moaned uncontrollably as he kept thrusting in you, his own high approaching quickly.

When he came he fell against your chest, panting for breath as you played with his hair gently.

You both cleaned up a bit before falling asleep for the night, your activities wearing you both out more than you expected.

———

Nick had been home for two weeks, spending an equal if not greater amount of time at your apartment than at his own. Your undefined ‘thing’ had progressed into a full blown relationship, you two spending every second possible with each other.

You woke up to him almost every morning, your body wrapped up in his arms and his lips peppering kisses all over your face. The rare times he wasn’t at your place you could call him and he’d drop everything to come see you.

You found happiness in each other’s company, the kind of happiness that is so surreal that you can’t believe it’s possible and you know you’ll never let it go.

You couldn’t believe that you’d disliked him so much for so long. Sometimes you felt angry at yourself that you didn’t get to know him sooner, feeling like you wasted valuable time... but then you’d realize if it had happened any other way that it wouldn’t be the same. It wouldn’t be as strong.

Everything started with a poorly planned trip to see your friend Brandon. And you thank god every day that things didn’t work out how they were supposed to.

****

Hi! It’s here! I didn’t want to disappoint with the ending, so I hope that this is a good enough conclusion to this story! Thank you guys so much for reading!!!!

[peachymara]

drunk voicemails- Nick Mara

I’m sure someone has written something similar, so creds to you but I wanted to write something of my own & add it to the mix! enjoy!

You and Nick had always been close. Best friend kinda close for a while now. You’ve been there for him though it all. The fame, the girls, the breakups. You were his number one and he was yours.

Since the band had formed and their following grew, everyone started talking about the two of you. Whether it be comments on each other’s instagrams, pictures posted of the two of you or you happening to be in the background of some story at one of their house parties, it all began to blow up.

You knew how you felt and for some time now, you were simply in love with your best friend. He was your go to, the one you went to for anything and everything. You couldn’t possibly think he could ever feel the same, until tonight.

The boys had invited you to join them on a night out, celebrating the release of their new ep. Considering the fact you had huge exams coming up the next couple days, you decided it was better off you stay in and get some work done, well so you thought.

Your phone rang, a call from Nick read on your phone. Stopping your work for a minute, you picked up the phone expecting nothing but a normal conversation with Nick about all the possible things you could be missing out on this particular night.

‘Y/N!!’ Nick yelled over the loud music, ‘our ep made it onto the charts! We’re doing it babe. We’re doing big things’, he smiled over the phone. It wasn’t unlike the two of you to call each other pet names, it was almost normal after all these years of friendship. ‘Congrats baby!! I’m so proud of you, you really have no idea’

The two of you talked for a little before letting him go, knowing you had some serious studying to do before the big week ahead of you. Finals after finals, each day and a prettymuch show to end your week. You couldn’t be more happy for Nick, he truly deserved the world and more. The amount of hard work and dedication he put in for these fans, this music, seriously had you swept of your feet and he had no idea, as you believed.

After hours upon hours working, you decided to call it a night and started getting ready for bed before phone calls, followed by hundreds of texts and Snapchat’s from Nick started blowing up your phone. You picked up, wondering what this boy could possibly be so eager to tell you now. You answered the call, noticing Nick was a little off. He was totally slurring his words and you knew he was not entirely there so you hung up, told him to enjoy his night off and hopped onto the couch, turning on a movie.

Hours had passed and the movie was finally over, so you decided to check your phone. Six voicemails, five from Nick and one from Edwin.

‘Hey baby, I just wanna say uh-, we made it onto the charts!’

‘Y/N, I wish you were here with us right now, well uh, with me, but I know you uhm- have to study’

‘Babe, look, I uh- don’t want to distract you but well, ya I guess I wish you were here with us! Love you!’

‘I want, I want uhm. You know what never mind’

‘Y/N babe, fuck I-‘

‘Listen. I want to be more than friends with you Y/N. I’m over this ‘best friend’ thing. I want to make you mine. I- uh, it’s just that this ‘just friends’ thing is not enough for me anymore’

Read all of Nick’s voicemails.

Edwin then left one;

‘Hey Y/N! I know you’re at home studying but Nick won’t stop going on about something how he has to be at your apartment, with you right now so we’re bringing him over. We’ll sort him out for you’

You then texted Ed back, letting him know it was alright to let Nick stay the night here, rather wanting to know he’s alright than not hearing from him again until the morning.

You had no idea what to expect from Nick the second Edwin and the rest of the boys brought him in so, you got your spare room ready for him, trash can and all.

5 minutes later, and Nick and Edwin were at the door, Nick’s arm slung over Ed’s shoulder. You both helped him into bed as you walked Edwin back to the door.

‘So, uh did you hear the messages he left me?’ You questioned Ed, bringing your hand to your face. ‘Yeah. Well I, I didn’t drink anything tonight. Someone had to be sober to make sure these kids did nothing too stupid’ he nervously laughed. ‘If you need me to take him back to ours, it’s totally fi-‘ ‘No Edwin, I got him. Just get the others back safe’ you laughed, ‘I got this one’, you smiled, hugging Edwin goodbye before heading back into the bedroom.

‘Hey Nicky boy. You going to be alright in here? Let me know if you need anything’ you said before making your way to the door. ‘Y/N’, he groaned, ‘I need you’. You sighed, ‘Nick, I’ve seen you drunk so many times, what’s so different this time?’ ‘It’s just, it’s just I don’t know. I love you’

‘I love you too Nick. You know that, you’re my b-‘

‘Don’t say best friend. Please. I want, no I need more than that babe’ he said, sitting up and grabbing your arm.

‘I can’t do this best friend thing anymore baby. It’s not me. I know you don’t feel the same but I want more. I don’t want to be just your ‘best frie-‘

You quickly cut him off with a kiss, crashing your lips onto his.

‘Don’t say it then’ you smiled, pulling away.

‘Whether or not your my best friend or something more, you need sleep. You have a big weekend coming up!’, you laughed, tucking him into the covers.

‘Stay then. Stay with me Y/N’

You nod, joining him in bed. Snuggling into his chest, he placed a kiss to the top of your head. ‘Goodnight ma’ he grinned, before drifting off to sleep. You smiled to yourself. He was a mess and you loved every bit of it.

[thedirtpreferences]

Preference #1 — he takes care of you when you’re drunk

Vince: “Vin, do you even know how much I love you?” The words were hardly comprehensible as your fingers brushed gently across his cheekbones. “I mean, seriously, Vince. I’m like actually in love with you, none of that fake shit yuuno?” Vince had been your boyfriend for approximately a year and a half and he had never seen you lose control quite like this. To say he was amused was an understatement. “Oh, I know. You know I love you too, baby.” Vince kissed the crown of your head as you began to giggle. “I just don’t think you know...Like, I am actually IN love with you.” Showering his chest with small kisses, Vince shook his head as a small laugh emerged from his parted lips. “As much as I am loving this, you are so going to hate yourself in the morning. I really think we should get you to bed, yeah?” Vince had been trying to get you ready for bed for the past fifteen minutes, but to no avail. You were just too damn stubborn. “Oh, piss off Vince. How is it you get to stay up all night, but when I am having a good time we have to be responsible?” Vince had pulled the dress you were wearing over your head at this point, leaving you only in your underwear. “Because I know my Y/N, and I know if I let this go on for much longer, when she is sober tomorrow she is going to die from the embarrassment.” Vince was now tugging one of his tank tops over your head so that you were no longer nude. You frowned as he slid you further up the bed, pulling back the covers for you to slide under. “Well, your sober Y/N is boring. I just want to have fun,” You purred as Vince climbed in next to you, pulling your limp body closer to him. You were fighting sleep, and Vince knew that you were going to succumb sooner or later. “Just close your eyes, babe. You need to rest.” You began to respond, but fell asleep before you got the chance to. Vince chuckled when soft snores began to leave your mouth. “Goodnight, Y/N.” He kissed your head as he nuzzled closer to you.

Tommy: “Well, fuck.” Tommy jumped when your words suddenly broke through the silence of the room. He had carried you back to the hotel hours ago when you passed out in the bar after downing a bottle of vodka. Tommy had been expecting you to sleep through the night, but wanted to stay up just to make sure you were okay. “You scared the piss out of me.” He laughed as he walked over to the bed, rubbing the small of your back. “I scared the piss out of myself.” You rolled over onto your back, reaching your hand out for him to hold. Tommy intertwined his fingers with yours as his other hand brushed through your hair. “I figured you wouldn’t wake up till morning, you’re not use to drinking that much alcohol.” Tommy said as he brought your hand to his lips and kissed your knuckles lovingly. “I’m not use to drinking alcohol, you’re right. That’s why I’m awake.” You groaned as the nausea rolled through your body, the room continuing to spin. All you could think of was your poor boyfriend being drunk every night while doing his drum solo in a revolving cage. The mere thought made you close your eyes and bite down on your lip. “Oh, fuck. You feeling sick?” Coming to the realization, Tommy dropped your hand and quickly scrambled up from the bed. “Jesus, Tommy. I don’t have the fucking plague, I just abused my liquor tonight” You rolled your eyes when Tommy disappeared into the bathroom. When he came back, however, he held a basin in his hand and placed it on the floor on the side you were laying on. “Having the spins is still the fucking worst though, here scoot.” Tommy crawled in next you, pulling your back against his chest and kissing the back of your head. “If you’re going to puke, try to make it in the trash got it?” You giggled at his words, scooting deeper into his grasp. Suddenly you were feeling just a little bit better.

Mick: “You’ve gotta’ be fucking kidding me.” Mick spit between his clenched teeth as he saw Nikki and Tommy dragging your limp body down the hall. They froze in their tracks when they saw him, for they knew they had been busted. Mick had not been feeling well and had went back to the hotel room hours ago; he had trusted his bandmates just this one time to make sure you were okay. He should have known they would have got you fucked up. “Finally! I’ve been looking for you all night!” The words came out in an incomprehensible jumble as you broke out of the grasp that Nicki and Tommy had you in and took off running down the hall. “Hi, you.” Mick said as you crashed into him, holding him in a tight embrace. He leaned down and kissed the crown of your head as you hummed graciously into his chest. “We swear it was an accident, man. She had like four shots and she was gone.” Mick shook his head as he swiped his card to get back into his hotel room. “Y/N is a lightweight, I fucking warned you idiots. Go back to your party, we’ll talk tomorrow.” Placing his hands on your shoulders, Mick guided you into the hotel room. Once the door was shut, he turned you towards him and kissed you softly on the lips. “Mmmm, I missed you tonight.” You slurred as Mick guided you over to his bed. “Oh, yeah?” You fell back onto the bed letting your feet dangle as Mick quickly untied your shoes and chucked them across the room. “Yeah, s’not the same when you’re not there. Like my other half is missing, yuuno?” Mick’s heart became warm as he listened to you speak. Not many people could chip away at his cold exterior, but you had the ability to melt him completely. He loved you so much. “I missed you too, love.” Mick murmured as he rolled you over on your stomach and rubbed your back. He was happy you were with him and that you were safe.

Nikki: “Hold still!” Nikki exclaimed as you squirmed further away from him, consequently falling into the hotel sink and hitting your head on the mirror. “Ow!” You giggled as you rested your palm on the back of your head. Nikki was currently trying to remove the thick makeup that had settled into your skin from your crazy night out, but you were drunk and having absolutely none of it. “Maybe if you let me take this shit off your face, you wouldn’t have hit your head.” Nikki mused as he moved the warm washcloth closer to your face, laughing out of frustration when you moved your head once again. “We both know I’m prettier with this shit on my face, so maybe if you let me keep it on I wouldn’t keep moving.” You chirped. “Who said you were prettier with that shit on?” He pressed his index finger under your chin making you look up into his serious, yet shimmering orbs. You were helpless under his intense gaze. “I did,” You choked as you tried to divert eye contact. “Well, you are absolutely wrong. I think you are beautiful without it. In fact, I love your eyes.” Moving the washcloth over your eyes, Nikki removed the thick foundation revealing your bruised irises. After doing so, he pressed his lips lovingly against your eyelids. “I love your cheeks,” He hummed as he moved the washcloth over your cheeks, revealing the crimson that had rushed to the surface due to his warm affection. When he finished, he kissed both your cheeks. He continued to remove the makeup from your face, peppering your features with kisses as he named what he loved about you. Even though you were drunk, your confidence was still so low, so hearing this made your heart flutter. When he finally removed your bright red lipstick, he pressed his lips lovingly against yours and kissed you passionately and sincerely. “I love your lips the most.” He murmured as you moved to the edge of the sink and wrapped your body around him like a koala. “I love everything about you, my little drunk emp of Satan.” Nikki smiled as he lifted you from the sink and carried you to bed.

[shutupandshipit]

Blood and Diamonds - Part 2

Summary: "Welcome to the stage… Lilith.”

Or where Neil is a stripper at the Days’ strip club when Ichirou doesn’t need him for family business, and Andrew is Kevin’s bodyguard. It’s only Andrew’s second month as Kevin’s bodyguard and it had been pretty boring up until then, but it only takes one night in the Days’ club for things to get just a little more interesting. For both him and Neil.

Pairing: Andreil

Rating: M

Previous <- Part 1: Lilith

Part 3 -> Next (coming soon)

Part 2: Gold

Kevin walked out of the VIP room at a time closer to dawn than to midnight, looking far worse for wear than he should have. After Neil had left the room, Riko had spent the rest of the night getting systematically drunk and harassing both Jeremy and Thea. It had been about an hour since he'd fallen asleep, and Kevin had taken the chance to slip out. He found Nicky nodding off while Andrew paged idly through the book Nicky had been reading earlier that night.

Looking between them, he said, "Minyard, we're going." He nudged Nicky's shoulder, jostling him awake. "Nicky, go to bed. You know where your room is."

Nicky mumbled, but staggered to his feet and away down the hall.

Standing, Andrew slid into his jacket, buttoning it slowly before looking at Kevin impassively. "Where are we going?" he asked, leading the way down the stairs onto the quiet ground floor.

The waiters and waitresses moved around slowly, sweeping and mopping and wiping down tables. Earphones poked out of their ears, tinny music rising from them as they passed. On stage, Dan and Allison were going through new routines they'd developed with his father that focused on floor work rather than pole dancing.

He thought that if they did it right, they'd pull off just floor work supplemented with pole dancing rather than the other way around which would be good for the others as most of their joints weren't the best anymore. Or they'd transition to just floor work in general. He wanted to see if they could be the first strip club not to use a pole in their performances. Not all of the performances, of course, because there were some performers who couldn't dance at all. The pole was their only saving grace.

"Dan, Allison, that's looking good, but you need to spread more. Where's Renee?" Usually the three women practiced together before going home, but with Neil working with Ichirou tonight, he could only assume what she'd been pulled for.

"Strained something in my hip tonight," Dan explained, closing her legs so they were sticking straight in the air before rocking forward to sit properly. "Neil called her at the end of shift for something. She'll be in late tomorrow."

"Wonderful," Kevin sighed. That must have been why Ichirou wanted them off the estate for the night as well. Creating another body that only Renee could make disappear properly. Turning, he followed Andrew to the door without another comment.

Behind him, the women called a little irately and mostly sarcastically, "Goodnight!"

Andrew waved over his shoulder to them, and Dan laughed happily before returning to their practice. He slid into the front seat of his car, waiting for Kevin to get in the passenger seat before asking again, "Where are we going?"

"To pick something up. I'll direct you, but the address can't go in the GPS."

Without anymore questions, Andrew started the car and pulled out of his parking spot. He turned the radio down to a low murmur, just to fill the silence between directions.

Kevin directed him precisely for forty-five minutes, further and further from the city and deeper into the suburbs. It was nearly five in the morning when Kevin directed Andrew into an overcrowded driveway. Once they were parked behind several run down SUVs, Kevin pulled himself from the car and marched to the door, Andrew following curiously behind him.

His eyes flickered over the houses, lawns, cars, toys, single person randomly walking their dog. He put his eyes on everything around them, and Kevin tried to not let it piss him off.

Andrew was the best bodyguard he'd ever had, preventing more things than reacting to them. His life had never been so stable, but that came with the added irritation of his constant suspicion and vigilance. It was a price he was willing to pay, but not that he paid happily.

Kevin had only tapped on the door once before it jerked open, a frazzled looking woman smiling at him from the other side. Her kinky black curls had expanded becoming a full on afro, and deep bags marred the skin beneath her eyes.

"Oh Kevin, thank goodness."

"Mrs. McKean, it's good to see you again. How's Rodger?"

"As crotchety as ever. Neil?"

Kevin nodded. "Work, yes."

From the back of the house, what sounded like a stampede headed in their direction. Kevin crouched in preparation, opening his arms as a mass of human hair hurled itself at him and straight into his arms. The breath left his chest, and he held the squirming mass close.

"Uncle Kevin!" it screeched.

Mrs. McKean pressed a hand to her cheek, smiling through her exhaustion. "That man works so hard for this little girl. He'd do anything for her."

Kevin nodded in agreement, lifting the small girl into his arms and pushing her rust red curls from her face. "Janey, baby girl, good morning."

"Morning, Uncle Kevin! Where's Daddy?"

"He's working, baby, so we're going to get breakfast and wait for him." He glanced at Mrs. McKean, but she had already disappeared into the house to gather the little girl's things. "How did you sleep?"

Instead of answering, Jane's big blue eyes were glued to Andrew over his shoulder. When he turned, Andrew's hazel eyes were glued to her in turn, and he watched an actual honest to God stare off between a grown ass man and a four-year-old. Uncle Kevin, who's that? He looks like the lady I saw in my dream last night."

Kevin turned completely to face Andrew, smiling gently. "That's Andrew, your new uncle. He's your daddy's friend."

"Is he safe?"

Kevin hid a snort in a cough, and cleared his throat. "He's not going to hurt you."

"Or Daddy?"

They both looked at Andrew in expectation.

He seemed taken aback by the direct question, but he only narrowed his eyes. "Only if he hurts your... Uncle Kevin."

Seeming to accept that answer, Jane opened her mouth to continue talking when Mrs. McKean stepped back into the doorway. She had a bright orange and white fox backpack in her hand, a fox stuffed animal with a pudgy little body and legs, and a car seat. "Sorry for the wait, Kevin. Here's everything she had today. Neil's bringing her by tonight?"

"No. Jeremy's off today, I think. And she has a couple appointments."

"Okay, well, you just have him let me know, alright. I'll see you." Leaning in, she pressed her cheek to Kevin's before smothering Jane in kisses. Jane giggled and screamed as she pulled away. "Good night then, and good morning."

"Bye Mrs. McKean. Say bye, Jane."

"Bye bye, ma'am!" she called happily, waving wildly as the woman closed the door behind her.

Andrew seemed to be vibrating with questions and waited only until Jane was safely installed in her car seat with her fox to release them. "What the fuck?" he hissed as Kevin closed the car door. "Do you know how much of a problem this is?"

"What? Picking up Neil's child?"

"No, dipshit!" Andrew snapped, "You and Josten in a relationship with a child?"

"We're not in a relationship."

"There's a fucking child in the mix, Day! Whether you two are fucking or not doesn't mean that someone won't use that little girl as leverage. Against you. Against him to get him to cooperate. Do you know what a major problem this is? What a major security risk she is for you? You have got to be fucking kidding me! You better have a damn good reason for hiding something massive like this from me." He was hissing through his teeth, jaw clenched as he glared at Kevin with so much venom, it was a wonder he wasn't already dead.

Kevin looked him dead in the eye as he said, "Because you'd react like this. And she is not optional." He moved around Andrew and towards the passenger door.

"What the fuck does that mean?"

Sighing, Kevin turned back to him. "It means she's important to me. It means Neil's important to me, as much as I hate to admit it. To all of us. And we're not giving her up for anything. Not only myself, but every Fox and Dad would die for her, okay? This is not a discussion."

"What about Riko? Remember that psycho? I don't fucking understand what's happening here."

"I'll explain what I can, Andrew, but you're not going to understand. Riko knows not to threaten or touch her. There's too many of us, and Renee broke his wrist the last time he even insinuated that he'd do something to her. He has a lot against us, but-" Kevin's voice dropped low, his eyes narrowed and distant with hatred. "I'll kill him if anything happens to Jane."

Andrew was silent, and Kevin only climbed into the car when Andrew walked around to the driver's side. Kevin softened under Jane's singing, and he turned in his seat to smile at her. "That sounds great, Jane, where'd you hear it?"

She beamed, and Kevin melted, and Andrew stared. "Daddy's practice."

.....

Andrew allowed Kevin to direct them to a small road side diner closer to the city than the daycare was, but not close enough to matter, seething the entire time. He could absolutely not believe Kevin would be stupid enough to keep... this from him. This child. This liability. This mass of curly human hair singing in the backseat that looked so much like her father he had to wonder if the mother had even contributed any of her genes.

"Uncle Andrew, can you hold Cupcake for me, please?" the little girl asked as he stood outside the car door.

He stared down at her. "What's Cupcake and why?"

"My fox!" she said, waving the little potato shaped fox at him emphatically, "So I can unbuckle."

"I'm going to get her bag from the other side," Kevin said with a smirk, leaving him to the wolves as he watched her.

"I might drop him, and then he could get dirty," she continued to explain.

After a moment of long staring between the two of them, he caved and said, "Well, we wouldn't want that." He took the fox, watching as she very competently released each clasp.

"Don't even try to get out on your own," Kevin warned from the other side, "You know what happened last time. Your dad would kill me if you get a bloody nose again."

"Noooo," Jane sang, but looked to Andrew with wide trusting eyes. She lifted her arms. "Can you please help me out? Uncle Kevin doesn't think I'm a big girl."

"Is he right? Do you get hurt often?" Andrew asked, staring at Kevin through the car.

Kevin opened his mouth to reply, but Jane huffed. "My legs don't work right sometimes. I fall a lot, and I fall every time I get out on my own. I get hurt, but if I don't try, then how will I learn?"

Andrew knew that it was dangerous for children to trust so easily, but Kevin was right. He wouldn't hurt this little girl, least of all because she was Neil's daughter. Mostly because he'd been young at one point and he knew what it was like to not be able to trust anyone. Or to be betrayed by someone he trusted. So, he caved. He let himself compare her to her father, and he found himself interested in her story.

"I'll help you learn eventually, but let's save that for another time." Andrew leaned down, and instead of lifting her by the underarms like he'd been planning, she wrapped her arms around his neck and hung on tight.

Sighing, he pulled her against his chest and ducked out of the car, holding her like anyone would hold a toddler. She was so small for her age, he thought, just a sac of potatoes or maybe a medium size bag of dog food. Then again, he didn't often interact with four-year-olds. Maybe this was a normal size for girls her age.

He lowered her to the pavement, and she smiled up at him, holding tight to his fingers. "You're nicer to hug than Uncle Kevin, but not as nice as Daddy."

Kevin made an offended sound as he rounded the car, staring at the little girl. "I've dedicated four years of my life to you, and this is how you repay me?"

"I love you more than Uncle Andrew though because I don't know him as well."

"At all," Andrew corrected under his breath.

Jane looked at him, perplexed. "I know that your name is Uncle Andrew and you care about Uncle Kevin and Daddy and give nice hugs. So, I know a little about you."

"Okay," Andrew conceded because he didn't want to have an argument with a four-year-old. "Let's just get inside."

"Pancakes!" Jane sang, dragging him along behind her. In the booth, she patted the seat next to her. "Uncle Andrew, you sit here, and Uncle Kevin can sit over there with Cupcake until Daddy shows up. And then Daddy can have Cupcake's spot. Uncle Andrew, you'll eat pancakes like me right?"

Andrew nodded, unconcerned with his diet being decided by a little girl. "With chocolate chips and whipped cream. You can't have coffee though." The little girl crowed, jumping excitedly as she scribbled across the back of the paper place mat and crayons she'd been given. He couldn't stop the smirk from pulling at his lips before glaring at Kevin.

The waitress came by, taking their orders before disappearing.

"Open your fucking mouth and tell me what is going on. Now. How did you and Neil meet? And the girl."

Kevin's mouth pursed into a tight line as he considered how to answer, but before he could say a word, Jane perked up.

"Oh! I know this story," she started brightly, "When Daddy was really young, his papa and his mama and Mommy used to be really bad people. That's how Daddy got all his scars. Mommy did something bad to him, and then didn't want me afterward. Daddy left with me so they wouldn't do bad things to me too. He went to Uncle Kevin for help because they grew up together. He got him a job working with Dan and Matt and Renee and Allison and Seth and Grandpa Wymack and even Roland! Roland is really nice. He always lets me paint his nails. And then Uncle Ichirou took us in until Daddy and I could live on our own!"

She looked up at Andrew's attentive expression, grinning. "Now we're family. That's how Daddy and Uncle Kevin and I know each other!"

Their food came soon after that, and they dug in while Andrew chewed on the new information. It was a simplified version for sure, and he knew there was more to it than just that, but Jane had given him quite a bit to think about.

From the opposite side of the table, Kevin whispered, "He showed up at three in the morning with her, just a newborn baby. She hadn't even been a week old. He looked like a nightmare covered from head to toe in blood, this tiny little thing cradled to his chest. He'd been terrified," Kevin explained quietly, staring down into his plate, "He wouldn't talk to me about it. Wouldn't explain what had happened. I still don't really know everything. Anything. I know Riko was involved, but not to what extent. And I know that they found the Butcher's body the next day. Well, Ichirou and Lord Moriyama did."

"What was the bad thing done to him?"

"That's not for me to tell. That's Neil's story. I don't even know if he'd be okay telling you what I already have."

"What about her legs?"

Kevin's face darkened. "Something that her mother did to her."

Inhaling deeply, Andrew turned his eyes back to the little girl. Her cheeks were flushed and round, her hair full and soft looking and healthy. She didn't look malnourished, and she clearly had enough imagination to keep herself busy as she chatted at her fox toy happily.

She was clearly well taken care of.

"I'll ask him myself," Andrew said as he looked over at Kevin again.

"He's a liar when you first meet him. So be careful what you believe from him."

Andrew thought back to the game they'd played that night and thought he wasn't really going to have a problem with that.

"Where's Daddy?" Jane whined, "It's already six thirty. He's never this late."

Andrew frowned, glancing at the clock and realizing she was right about the time. Turning to her, he said, "Finish your food and maybe he'll show up."

"I'm saving half for him," she grumbled, cheek smushed in her palm as she stared out the window.

"He'll get his own when he gets here, baby," Kevin told her, voice softer than Andrew had ever heard it.

The difference continued to give Andrew whiplash. Instead of thinking of the implication, he turned to the little girl. "Your Dad would rather have you finish your food than share with you. You need to eat everything on your plate to grow. Don't you want to be as strong as him?"

She glanced at him out of the corner of his eye, and nodded. She huffed. "Yeah, I do."

"Then finish your food. Your dad will get his own when he gets here."

"Fine."

"Okay, Miss Attitude." Turning back to Kevin, he didn't miss the way he whipped the smile off his face. "Not a fucking word, Day."

It was another fifteen minutes, plates cleared away and coffee cups refilled before Jane threw herself over Andrew's lap and sprinted from the diner.

Glancing out the window, Andrew watched as she threw herself into her father's arms. Her cry was muffled by the glass. "Daddy!"

Neil looked exhausted in a charcoal three piece suit that fit him more snugly than Andrew's, caught her easily. He held her tightly, face pressed into her curls for several long minutes. He lowered her to the ground, starting for the diner with her hand held in his.

Andrew watched them, baffled by the similarities between them, and he was the one with an identical twin. He was nearly convinced that Neil had simply cloned himself, and by some freak accident had made her a girl.

Across from him, Kevin waved down the waitress and put in another order. She had already bustled away when Neil pushed open the door and followed his daughter's lead towards them.

She was explaining the seating situation as Kevin slid out to let Neil in. "So you sit where Cupcake is and I sit next to Uncle Andrew."

Neil stared at him in amusement as Andrew lifted the little girl up and over him into her seat. "'Uncle' Andrew, is it?" he asked with a smirk.

"Yeah!" Jane chirped, sitting closer to him than she had before.

When Neil's food arrived, he ate quickly and swallowed the contents of his coffee cup. "Andrew, can you watch her for a moment? I need to talk to Kevin."

Andrew nodded, noticing the blood staining his shirt cuff for the first time.

They slid out of the booth and through the diner door. Andrew paid the waitress for the meals, watching intently as the conversation got more animated and Kevin grew increasingly angrier and more horrified until he was hissing through clenched teeth.

"Come on, Jane. Looks like we need to break up a fight."

Jane's eyes grew wide. "A fight? Daddy and Uncle can't fight!"

Andrew smirked, sliding from the booth and waiting until she slid towards him to hold out a hand. She grabbed it as she jumped down, stumbling a little as her legs buckled beneath her. He held her up so she didn't hit the ground. "That's why we're going to stop them before they start."

"Right," she said, determination in her eyes as they left. "Bye bye, Miss Sherry!"

The waitress grinned back. "Goodbye, little lady. Have a good morning. You too, sir."

Andrew didn't say anything, and he lifted Jane by her hand so she was dangling to swing her down the stairs. She squealed with laughter, rocking her feet to make herself swing more.

Kevin cut off suddenly, pulling away from where he'd been pushing his face close to Neil's. He glared pointedly at Andrew.

.....

Neil couldn't keep his eyes off of Andrew, his chest warm and his heart soft as he swung Jane towards them.

"What are we talking about so urgently?" Andrew asked casually, letting Jane's feet skip across the ground instead of actually touching down.

"You're so strong, Uncle Andrew! Uncle Kevin can't do this!"

A laugh bubbled in Neil's chest, and he pressed his lips into a thin line. An unwilling smile tugged at the corners of his mouth.

Just as much as he was, Kevin was unwaveringly devoted to Jane in a way the others couldn't be. They'd never held her, tiny and covered in blood. They'd never been woken at three in the morning to her screaming and rocked her while Neil made up a bottle. They hadn't been there for the worst part of her life. So to hear Jane already leaning towards Andrew as if he'd been the one there... Well, Neil could only imagine how mad that made him.

"Don't you fucking smile at that, asshole!" Kevin snarled at him.

"Why? It's funny."

"No, it's not."

"Yes, it is."

"Stop fighting!" Jane shouted at the top of her lungs, "We're family, and family isn't supposed to fight! So stop fighting!"

Both men breathed in sharply, snapping their eyes towards her. They held their breath for several long heartbeats before letting it out slowly in unison. "Sorry, Jane, you're right," Neil said, stepping towards her and lifting her into her arms. She was still as light as ever, barely weighing twenty-five pounds, and he couldn't help but crush her to his chest. The events of the day crashed down on top of him, Andrew and Riko and Kevin, and all Neil wanted in that moment was to cuddle with his daughter in bed and fall asleep to whatever movie she wanted to watch.

Exhaustion weighed heavy on him, and he sighed into her hair. "Kevin, I'm going home now. We can talk more later. Just... don't do anything stupid before practice."

He was looking at Andrew when he said this though, and Andrew narrowed his eyes.

For once in his life, Kevin didn't argue. Instead, he stomped towards the sleek black Maserati and pulled out Jane's car seat. He carried it towards Neil's own considerably older Mazda, functional if not stylish.

"Thank you," Neil said before setting Jane on the ground, "Say bye to your... Uncles so we can go home. It's late and we've got to be up this afternoon."

"'Kay!" Jane chirped and ran over to hug Andrew's legs. Taken aback, he could only stare at Neil.

Neil shrugged as she detached herself from him and ran into Kevin's arms.

Kevin scooped her up, holding her against his chest fiercely. "Goodnight, I'll see you this afternoon. Give your Dad hell."

"Noooo," Jane crowed, giggling as she pressed a kiss to his cheek.

Instead of letting her go, Kevin took the time to install her in her car seat, talking to her all the while.

Standing next to Andrew, Neil couldn't help the discomfort that wriggled in his chest.

"He loves her way to much for his own safety," Andrew muttered, watching the pair interact happily.

Neil glanced over, curious. "Can you love someone too much?"

"Yes."

He sighed after a moment. “Yeah, I guess you can.” Looking back at the pair, Neil nodded. "Yeah, he does, but I don't think that's a bad thing."

.....

Things changed after that night. Andrew became a regular at the club, in Neil's private room, and in his life all together. Two month of getting to know each other and annoying Kevin.

Standing on stage, Neil rolled his eyes as Kevin spat insult after insult at him. "You're completely fucking useless!" he shouted.

"Sure. That's why I'm your most popular dancer. Yeah. Whatever you say, Kevin," Neil replied sarcastically, pushing his damp bangs back from his forehead. He retied his orange paw print bandanna, cinching it tight. He could feel Andrew's eyes on him with each movement from the table he was sharing with Jane. "I don't see why you're freaking out this badly. You're the one who wanted to switch things up. Plus, Allison and I are doing pretty good after you've literally changed our routine three times."

"You're too stiff! You're moving like Seth!"

"Hey! Fuck you!" Seth shouted from the far end of the stage where Matt, Dan and Renee were helping him through flexibility training stretches.

"Jesus Christ," Kevin hissed, pinching the bridge of his nose, "Just- Start from the top!"

Rolling his eyes, Neil looked back at Allison. There was sweat pouring down her beautiful face and sculpted body, her expression flat with irritation as she ran her hand back through her hair. "How does that speed feel?" he asked, ignoring Kevin's snarled warning.

"Feels a little slow for the music, like we're off beat. I feel like we shouldn't drop into that sit until we hear her 'sweat'. We could speed it up just a bit, and I think it'd feel more natural."

Neil nodded, and they turned towards the front of the stage in unison. They took a moment, tugging at the hems of their tiny shorts. Neil's were halfway up his ass by that point, and he could feel them trying to creep further. After tightening the straps of their heels, they nodded.

The music started, and they only had a few moments before they heard the lyrics cry, 'Woah! Oo!'

They burst into movement in perfect sync, snapping their heads up and then around their shoulders. Normally, for this routine, Neil would be wearing a fiery red wig that mimicked Allison's long, straight blonde hair, but it was too hot beneath the lights, and he didn't want to have to style it again before the night began. The tangles were always brutal after a routine like this.

They moved sinuously and sensually, the most erotic pair out of all the Foxes as they strutted towards the front of the stage. When they snapped forward from the waist to grab their ankles, they were facing each other and Allison's hair snapped across his shoulder and neck as they barely avoided cracking their skulls together. That's how they're dances always were, sensual, sexual, savage, especially if they weren't touching each other. They were always so close that is didn't matter if they did or didn't. It still had the crowd roaring with approval.

Instead, Jane just clapped and laughed happily. Some people might have found it strange and a little disgusting that Neil brought his daughter to dance practice for his stripping job, but it was the easiest way to keep an eye on her. On top of that, he didn't want his daughter growing up with any sort of complex or stigma about women's sexuality. He wanted her to grow up knowing that it was okay and that she didn't have to hide it, that she could be strong and girly or she could be a tomboy and still womanly. The club was the place she got the most female interaction, and that was something Neil wanted to provide for her even if he never wanted to be with a woman again.

He didn't really know how to pull it all together in his head at the end of the day. He just knew that he felt like the club during the day was a good place for her to be.

Neil caught the glimpse of a smile on Allison's lips at Jane's happy shrieking, and it only made him grin further. Dancing with Allison was almost as intoxicating as watching her, and Neil always loved partnering with her. He enjoyed partnering with all of the girls, and Matt on the occasion, but Allison was always the most fun.

'I need that/to get me off!'

They hit the ground, going straight into their splits before swinging their legs around to meet. When they sat back on their heels, their damp shoulder blades met, and they bounced together as the song continued, 'Sweat until my clothes come off!'

Neil's eyes involuntarily darted to where he knew Andrew was as his dragged his fingers down his lips, and his body felt electric when he caught Andrew's hazel gaze out of the corner of his eye. Heat gathered low in his belly as the memory of Andrew's hand between his legs slipped through his mind, and he gasped silently before dropping onto all fours to crawl away from Allison's grounding presence.

Through the rest of the dance, the rest of the touches and the heat, Neil couldn't keep his eyes from moving back to Andrew every few moments or his mind from wandering to every touch they'd shared in two months. It got harder and harder to tear his eyes away each time until they were simply stuck there.

When the song finally ended, Allison and Neil's hands plastered to each other's hips, they were gasping and drenched and Neil was 99.9% sure that he'd cum in his shorts. For the sake of his dignity, he hoped not, but he wouldn't hold out any hope. He knew for sure that he was still achingly hard, and he was thankful that he had to tuck to wear most of his outfits. Especially to wear these shorts.

"That was better," Kevin grumbled grudgingly, glaring at them, "Whatever you were thinking about this time, make sure you're thinking about it again tonight. And wear something that you can take layers off along the way."

"Whatever," Allison muttered, turning towards the other four on stage.

"Practice is done! Go get cleaned up, get something to eat, and get ready before the doors open! Neil, you're on pretty much all night so don't burn yourself out with the first two dances! Do you hear me? Neil, Allison, Dan, you're up first so make sure you're back before seven. If you're late, I will shove my foot so far up your asses that you'll be able to taste my boot!" Wymack shouted from the bar where he'd been discussing budget with Roland.

"Wait!" Jane wailed, running up to the stage as Allison dangled her legs over the edge and dropped to the floor, "One more, Daddy!"

"One more?" Neil almost groaned, smiling through his tiredness. "Daddy's tired, baby."

"Please!" she said, clasping her hands together, "I love watching you dance! Just one more!"

Looking towards the DJ booth, Neil caught Jeremy's eye. He was grinning, leaning along the edge and waving to Neil. After a moment, Neil sighed, and said, "Because I can't tell you no... What do you want to see?"

"7 Rings!"

"Well, you heard the lady!" Neil called to Jeremy, and a moment after he disappeared, the music started. When Neil danced for his daughter, it was all fluid feminine movements, wide smiles and silly faces when he tilted his head and canted his hips. He used those dances to showcase his talent and flexibility rather than his body.

From the opposite side of the stage, Dan shouted and sprinted over and straight into the dance with him, grinning widely. “I love this routine!”

They started on the floor, slowly going from one hip to the other and then to their stomachs and into a crouch before getting to their feet. When they spread their feet wide and raised their arms over their heads, Jane shrieked in delight.

Neil laughed as they kicked out their legs, and Dan ultimately kicked him in the ankle because they weren't spread out enough.

The dance devolved from there, Neil sinking to the floor and Dan shouting apologies through her laughter. She dragged him back to his feet after catching her breath.

When the song came to and end, he dropped to ground level, sweeping Jane up into his arms. He peppered her face with kisses as she screamed and giggled and wiggled. "Uncle Andrew! Save me! He's all sweaty!"

Neil could see a lewd comment sitting on the tip of Andrew's tongue when he caught his eyes, but he raised an eyebrow before the man could say a word.

"If you let him go, he can take a shower so he's not sweaty. And then you can go get something to eat with him." Andrew held out his hands to her, and she reached for him willingly.

Neil handed her over before turning to follow the rest of the team into the changing room. They were all seated at their vanities staring at him when he entered, even Kevin and Wymack at the back of the room. He hadn't noticed all of them leaving the main room.

Dan and Allison were grinning wolfishly. Matt winked at him. Renee smiled softly. Seth scowled while Kevin and Wymack simply stared back.

Narrowing his eyes, Neil let the door slam shut and snatched up his shower things from his vanity. "Whatever this is, I'm cool not sticking around for it because I can already tell it has more to do with me than I'd like," he told them, turning back to the door, but Renee grabbed his shoulder.

"They're being nosy. Coach and Kevin actually wanted to discuss the line up before we all broke for lunch," she explained.

The others took Renee's explanation as an invitation to jump into the conversation feet first. "Yeah, so, like, when did that become a thing?" Matt asked, grin widening as Neil darted a look to him.

"What?" Neil asked, purposefully remaining obtuse because he didn't want to talk about the not-relationship he'd developed over the last two months. The absolute trust he'd somehow found himself giving the other man without provocation. The way he'd allowed Jane to be alone with Andrew. The hours they'd spent together between dances and at the end of his shift, smoking and waiting for when he could pick Jane up while Kevin puttered around the club. Neil would have liked to talk about it, but not with everyone currently present in the room. Especially not with Seth glowering at him.

For being a stripper, Seth was the kind of homophobic that not only pissed Neil off, but made him want to push his buttons every single day.

Seth's brand of homophobia was also the kind that made Neil a little scared. Scared that one day he'd have to defend himself.

He'd heard stories about other strippers like him, and so many of those had ended badly.

Kevin had warned him when he first began at the club that Neil should at least feign at being straight, even if he wasn't which wasn't the problem. Being demisexual wasn't the problem. The problem was that Neil was good at being a stripper. He was good at being feminine and sensual. He was good at being a mix of feminine and masculine, but never at just being masculine.

He was the Butcher's Son, the right hand man of Ichirou Moriyama, the person that was called whenever he needed someone dead. That didn't make him invulnerable though, and he had no illusions about how much bigger Seth was than him.

"Ah, come on, Neil. We're all friends here," Dan said, hopping off her vanity, "We're talking about Andrew. You know, the guy who's been requesting you every night? That guy?"

"Nope. Don't know him," Neil said decidedly, shrugging out from under Renee's hand and heading for the door.

"Ah, Neil, baby, come on. Don't be like that," Allison cooed, though there was laughter in her voice, "We just want to hear all about Andrew."

"Leaving!" Neil called over his shoulder, "Do whatever you want with the line up! I don't care!" He showered quickly, thankful as he always was for the stalls that Wymack had had installed when he'd brought the Foxes together. He showered quickly, happy to find that no, in fact, he hand not cum in his shorts like a teenager and that his boner had effectively been killed by the others' questions. He was out within ten minutes, pulling on snug jeans and fitted t-shirt. All clothing that Kevin had required him to wear since starting at the club. If he had his way, he would wear things that would bring as little attention to him as possible. Faded jeans and equally faded t-shirts, too big so as to cover up anything he didn't want people to see. Alas, Kevin wouldn't 'let him dress like a hobo', so he was subjected to anything Kevin and Nicky picked for him.

He only stopped by the changing room to grab his wallet and drop off his shower caddie and towel before darting back onto the main room.

"Where's the fire?" Andrew asked, looking up from where he was leaning over a picture with Jane. She was pointing excitedly when he looked away, and she pouted when he didn't look back.

"Nowhere. Where's Jeremy?" Neil asked, telling himself that the heat in his cheeks was from his shower and not from the embarrassment of his stage mates eyes on him.

"Here!" Jeremy called, hurrying down the stairs that led to the DJ booth. There was color high in his cheeks as well and a trail of hickeys darkening from just beneath his jaw to disappear below the collar of his shirt.

Neil smirked, leaning in close almost so that he was kissing Jeremy's ear so that only he could hear him. "What -or should I say who- were you doing just now? They left a few marks. Kevin loves to bite?"

Jeremy slapped a hand over his neck, the blush darkening as he pulled back with a laugh. "Stop teasing," he said, pushing at Neil's shoulder, "I don't tease you about your marks."

"I appreciate that, but you're reactions are just too priceless. Thanks for taking Jane tonight, by the way. I've got a few things to take care of after closing, so I might not be able to pick her up until the afternoon," Neil said, turning to the pair at the table who had all eyes on him. "What are you drawing?"

"You and me and Uncle Andrew!" Jane responded immediately, turning the picture towards him. She'd drawn Andrew in all gold, Neil in red, and herself in pink out front of a multicolored house. There was a dog in the window and a garden off to the side.

"No problem," Jeremy said, dropping his hand to survey the picture, "That's cool, Jane. Is that your house?"

"No! It's Daddy's dream home."

"Oh? I'm part of that?" Andrew asked with a smirk as his eyes flicked towards Neil.

Jane nodded vigorously as Jeremy laughed and walked around the table to pick up her backpack. "You have to be! You're family now!"

"What about your other uncles and aunts and grandparents?" Neil asked, feeling the heat rise again.

Jane rolled her eyes as if the answer were obvious. "Well, you don't like anybody else like you like Uncle Andrew. Obviously."

"Oh, obviously," Andrew snarked, and Neil scoffed. They glanced at each other, and Jeremy's laughter was uproarious.

Staring back, Andrew said, "Kevin banished me for lunch. So, I'm coming along."

Neil nodded, lifting Jane into his arms and heading for the doors.

.....

Andrew had Neil pressed up against the wall just in the doorway of the private room they always met in, hands holding his hips still as music and base thrummed through the floor and up through their feet. Neil moaned into his mouth, and he inhaled the sound with every ounce of his strength.

Two months had passed since their first meeting in that room, and those meetings hadn't stopped. If anything, they'd increased in frequency. Now, more often than not during working hours, if Andrew wasn't with Kevin or if Neil wasn't up on stage, they were in that room or outback smoking. If they weren't doing their jobs, they were together.

They spent most of their time together, talking and sitting a respectful distance away from each other. Sometimes though, they spent their nights like this. Pressed flush against each other, Neil's hands never straying from his shoulders while he allowed Andrew to take his touch where he wanted. Except to push beneath the hem of his shirt. Neil's torso was an off limits area that Andrew desperately wanted to get his mouth on, but never pushed for more than Neil was willing to give.

"I'm on soon," Neil said against his mouth, but didn't make much effort to push away from him.

"They'll be fine without you."

"Andrew," Neil said, pushing against him this time, and he relented. They separated, Neil pushed aside a curtain to reveal a mirror Andrew had never known about where he grimaced at his smeared lipstick. "They're starting to suspect, you know."

"Who and what?"

"The others. About... this." Neil gestured vaguely between them as he reached for a tissue and dabbed dispassionately at his mouth.

Andrew straightened his black button up before reaching for where Neil had threw his jacket on the floor earlier. He scoffed. "There is no 'this'. I don't do 'this'. Let them speculate."

Neil cut his eyes towards Andrew, expression as blank as some of the ones Andrew wore.

Andrew stared back until Neil glanced away and lifted his mask. He didn't say anything as he left, and Andrew had the oddest feeling that he'd done something he wasn't supposed to. That he'd fucked up in some way.

Frowning, he followed Neil's progress out and down to the ground floor where he took up his usual spot at the bar.

Roland slid him a double whiskey across the bar top. "What's that sour look for?" he asked, dropping his chin into his hands while he stared at Andrew.

"This is just my face," Andrew replied sourly.

Roland laughed. "Not one bit. You're a champ at neutral face, but I've only ever seen you make that face when you get into an argument with Kevin, Aaron or Nicky. So, what's going on?" Roland asked.

Before Andrew could tell him to fuck off, the lights dimmed, the candles were snuffed, and the stage light rose. Deep indigo light lit the stage and the music thrummed overhead as Dan, Neil and Allison marched out and stood shoulder to shoulder. They each wore their respective fox masks, looking menacing as they stood with their legs spread and feet planted.

Neil wore a black body suit that covered him from neck to shoulders to crotch, cutting high up his hips. The armpits dropped low so that the sides were open with only thin strips of golden fabric holding the front and back together. Over top, he wore strappy golden lingerie that matched the towering strappy heels he wore. A garter belt wrapped around his waist, connecting to the choker wrapped around his throat and the others wrapped around his thick thighs.

Andrew's mouth went dry. That hadn't been what Neil had been wearing ten minutes ago.

"Oh? What's gotten into him tonight?" Roland asked on the edge of a laugh, "This is something new. I kind of like it. Usually, he just wears all black."

"I know," Andrew growled. His irritation was completely encompassing, but also ridiculous. He couldn't tear his eyes away from Neil, but he could feel the lust rolling off the crowd. All eyes were on him, they had to be. Neil was too riveting for them to be anywhere else.

Roland glanced at Andrew, laughed into his hand, and drifted down the bar to another customer.

Andrew didn't know what he was supposed to do with the fact of Neil dropping into a crouch, hands on the pole in front of him before sliding back up it. Or when he dropped to his knees on the floor and then slid down until his belly was pressed flat. Or when he humped the floor generously.

Neil's eyes were on him the entire time.

When the song ended and Neil and the girls collected the tips littered across the stage, they strutted away to the lights dimming and going out. Andrew stood from his stool, hard and angry as he marched out the back door. He lit one cigarette, sucking it down in two inhales before lighting another off the end.

A thin, fine boned hand covered in scars reached over, taking the cigarette from his fingers.

Glancing over, Andrew found Neil, sweat slicked and flushed with a robe wrapped around him, pressing the filter to his lips. He stared at Andrew through the eyes of his mask, expression flat.

"I like the outfit," Andrew said, leaning back against the wall and reaching for another cigarette.

Neil nodded silently, turning his eyes away.

Narrowing his eyes, Andrew reached for the snout of the mask. "Yes or no?" Neil stilled, inhale paused and muscle stiff. He didn't look at Andrew, so he asked again, "Yes or no?"

"Yes," Neil whispered, and Andrew pulled the mask off.

He pressed the other man against the alley wall, hands on either side of his head. Neil stared back at him impassively as he searched his face for anything, searched for the truth. "Why are you angry?"

"I'm not angry."

"Yes, you are."

"You wouldn't know. Remember? There isn't a 'this' so how would you know?"

"That's why you're mad?" Andrew asked flatly.

Neil's eyes were cold, but tears sat on the edge of his lashes. "No. I just needed a reminder that I'm a commodity, not a person. I forgot that people pay for my company, nothing more. So, thanks for that."

"Neil," Andrew started, but was cut off.

"Honestly, I thought we actually had something going there." He dropped his eyes, and finally the tears splashed over his lashes. He raised a hand to wipe them away, but stopped midway, most likely remembering the make-up covering his face. His lipstick was smeared. "I haven't even wanted for you to pay for weeks, but Dan won't let me give you back your money. I haven't even touched it. All I've wanted was just to spend time with you. But I guess it was stupid for me to think you saw me as anything more than a stripper. A whore. I fucking feel stupid, but I'm more angry than anything. Jane loves you, and I like you, and I thought you- I guess it doesn't matter." Sniffling, he delicately pressed a knuckled to his nose.

Before Andrew could open his mouth to... What? Fix what he'd broken? Explain? Tell him a lie to make him feel better? Tell himself a lie to make himself feel better? He didn't know, but he didn't have time to figure out as the alley was filled with three silhouettes coming towards them.

Neil scrambled to pull his mask back into place, hide his wet cheeks. He dropped his cigarette in the process.

Andrew stepped away from him, but not far, glaring at the approaching men as he lifted his own half burned cigarette to his lips. He inhaled deeply, and smoke dribbled from between his lips.

"Oh, what is this?" Riko Moriyama slowly materialized from the darkness with Jean and one of his other many bodyguards at his back. He was smiling, malicious as ever as his eyes slid over the pair. Andrew felt the hair stand on the back of his neck as Riko's eyes trailed down Neil, staring at his bare legs. "Kevin's man giving you trouble?"

"No," Neil said without lifting his head, shoving his hands into the pockets of his robe and pulling the folds closed over his body.

"Are you sure? I can get Jean to take care of him for you."

Andrew prickled again, but kept his expression neutral, simply observing the situation.

"No, I'm fine. Thanks."

"Suit yourself," Riko said breezily, stepping closer as he stepped towards the back door. His next words were a stage whisper, his eyes trained on Andrew's face. "I'll see you later. I like the new look."

Neil's jaw tensed, but he said nothing as Riko and his bodyguards stepped into the club.

Andrew waited until the door closed to say, "We need to talk later after you're off."

"I've got business after work," Neil whispered, the tears trailing silently down his cheeks. His head remained bowed.

"I'll come with you. Kevin hasn't told me what you're doing, but if it has something to do with Kevin's safety, I have a right to know and to help."

Slowly, Neil lifted his head and stared at Andrew with watery, but hard blue eyes. "Can you handle it?"

Andrew raised a skeptical eyebrow. "I'm Kevin Day's bodyguard. If I can handle that, I can handle anything."

Neil snorted, wiping at his tears and seemingly forgetting about his make-up. "We'll see about that," he muttered wryly.

.....

"You're going to have to tell me what's going on," Andrew murmured as they leaned against an alley wall, hands shoved deep in their pockets and shoulders hugged high towards their ears.

It was late, later than either of them had had to stay up in weeks. The sun was beginning to crawl up the sky, pastel pink rays shooting out across the lightening blue expanse. Their breath plumed out before them, a steamy cloud that mingled with the smoke from Andrew's cigarette. Without meaning to, Neil pressed closer to Andrew's warm side and stared fixedly at the double doors to a warehouse.

Neil ignored Andrew, choosing instead to skate his eyes over the grey expanse of concrete between them in the towering metal doors. Over the past two months, he'd mostly spent time investigating Riko's holdings and the actual steps of distribution, looking for missteps. Looking for anything that was out of place.

The warehouse was one of Riko's many distribution centers, but it was rarely used. Actually, he'd never seen a shipment come in or out of the place, and whenever he and Ichirou went from warehouse to warehouse to check and make sure everything was running as it should, it was always completely empty. Just an extra space if one of the other warehouses got compromised. With that in mind, Neil had found it supremely suspicious that just in the last hour, he'd seen three cars come and go. Each time they were full when they entered and empty when they left.

"Let's head up there," Neil murmured, looking towards the fire escape scaling the side of the building. "I need to get a look at the inside."

"Why?"

Huffing out a frustrated sigh, Neil turned to look at Andrew. "Listen, I know you wanted to be here, but I need you to stop asking questions right now. There's a lot that could go wrong, and it could get really dangerous in just a short time. I need you not to question me at every turn, and if you can't do that, you're going to have to leave. I'll explain everything to you later, but not right now. Do you understand?"

Andrew sarcastically waved Neil forward.

Rolling his eyes, he quickly jogged over to the fire escape and dragged himself up the rickety metal until he was crouched just beneath the window. He didn't look -he definitely didn't look- as Andrew just as deftly and silently pulled himself up beside him with barely a grunt.

Swallowing hard, Neil peaked over the edge of the dirty cracked window to glance down into the dingy warehouse. There were flood lamps set up throughout the building illuminating long silver tables and a singular man putting stacks of bills into a money counter. The rest of the building was empty of people and the tables were stacked high with bricks sporting the Day family crest. There was a red slash through the crest that Neil had never seen before, and he tilted his head as far as he could to see if he could catch a glimpse of what was beneath him.

The sound of a very familiar voice had him flinching away from the window. "Did we get the next shipment in?"

Andrew caught him around the waist before he hit the railing and caused too much noise, but Riko's voice had his skin crawling. He jerked away from Andrew's touch with more force then he meant to, breathing heavily. He cradled his arms around himself, gritting his teeth as he clenched his fist and glanced over the edge of the window again.

Riko was striding towards the man at the table with the money counter. "He didn't notice?" His voice echoed through the building, making it louder than he actually was naturally.

The man glanced up, and while Neil couldn't see his expression, he could imagine what it looked like. "Who's to say? It's not like he actually oversees his operations. He's too pampered for that."

"That's for sure." Riko hummed, staring down at the table before glancing around. "We need to get rid of this tonight. During the performance. Ichirou is supposed to show tonight, so it's the best time. You have a buyer lined up?"

"Sure thing, boss," the man said, following Riko as he strode down the aisles and picked up one of the bricks to toss up in the air, "Got a couple buyers lined up. Have a couple more waiting for the next shipment if you can get more. There's people around the block for this shit."

"Mm, we'll see. Can't go taking too much or someone will get suspicious."

"Roger that." The man snapped a rubber band around the stack he'd put in the counter before Riko had come in and put it aside. "So, how's that night club you're at all the time, boss? Heard they have a lot of hot dancers. Heard they have this one dude who's more popular than the girls."

Riko and Neil froze at the same time, eyes darting to the man, but he didn't seem to notice.

Neil felt Andrew stiffen against him.

"Don't," Neil whispered urgently, unable to rip his eyes from the violence rippling through Riko's body, "Whatever he says, don't do anything."

"I'm not," Andrew growled through barely parted lips.

"Heard that if you can get him on his knees, he's a dream. He's one of your favorites, right?"

Riko was in front of the man in a moment, hand fitting comfortably beneath his jaw. The man squeaked, color rising in his cheeks as the muscles in Riko's arm flexed, fingers tightening. "Don't speak about things that you don't understand. Do you hear me? A whore like him could never find his way into my good graces. The only thing a slut like that is good for is a toy for someone else's pleasure. He is not a person, he is an object, and an object cannot be good at anything."

"G-got it," the man choked out.

Releasing the man, Riko stepped back and glared as the man began to cough uncontrollably. "Ready this shipment tonight, and keep your filthy opinion and disgusting proclivities to yourself or I'll take your tongue from you next time." Riko strode from the compound, one guard following and the other staying behind long enough to put a hand on the man's shoulder.

The bodyguard was Jean. "You should know better by now, Ben."

"He needs to come to terms with his own sexuality," Ben coughed in reply, "What the fuck made him flip?"

"That'll never happen.” Jean paused before continuing. “His 'favorite' was throwing a fit or something. He was dressed like a wet dream and angry the entire night. Riko likes shit like that, but he was gone before he could get his hands on him. It made him irritable."

"So he took it out on me? Are you fucking serious? He's a child."

"Yes, well-"

"Jean!" Riko shouted from outside the building, and Neil felt his voice in his bones, "We're leaving."

Dropping down to huddle into a ball on the fire escape, Neil pulled out his phone. He took several quick pictures of the warehouse, zooming in on the slashed crest. He sent each to Ichirou in succession, explaining to him everything that he'd seen.

Ichirou's reply quickly.

then we intercept the shipment. we need to catch him in the act though. my father will never agree to his execution otherwise

roger

Neil tucked away his phone before looking to Andrew. "Jane is staying with Jean for the night. We already discussed it, so... Do you want that explanation now? I need a drink."

Andrew nodded with narrowed eyes, following him down and away from the building.

   .....

If I could add links into the ending comments, I would. As it stands, I can't, so here's some links to Neil's outfit and the dances.

Neil's outfit - I couldn't find an approximation of what the bodysuit or heels look like, but this is what the lingerie looks like, just in gold. Andrew's lizard brain was in full throttle over this, let's be real.

Neil and Allison - modified so that they're mirroring each other instead. Listen, Marissa Heart is a babe, and I would happily let her kill me with those thighs.

Neil and Dan - Matt and Allison are the people screaming in the background

Neil, Dan and Allison's opening dance - there's no words, I just really love this choreography

I have a huge list of dances for the girls and Neil -sorry Matt and Seth- that I'll link at the end of the next chapter for your viewing pleasure if y'all are at all interested.

[side-effect-of-the-meds]

Erin and Ania are like holy fuck I can’t even. But for real Neil sees Abby as a mother figure in the book so like is it the same for Ania? Andrew too? Idek I just need to know their relationships with everyone

It’s time I map out their relationships anyways lol so thanks, love!

Let’s start with the lovely Ania 

Dan, Allison, and Ania are roommates. It’s tough after Seth’s death bc Ania has to face her all the time. Erin tells Allison her theory too so Allison is avoiding Ania so :////

Dan is essentially what Matt was to Neil. She sees Ania and her first thought is ‘baby’. She adopts her so fast. Every morning before class, she’ll pinch Ania’s cheeks and kiss her fingers, chef-style Idk man. It’s just something my mom does to me ok. Let me be soft. 

Renee rooms with Erin so Ania isn’t comfortable with her. Anyone that can spend the night in a room with that girl has to be hardcore. 

Allison also gives Ania a lot of shit about her wardrobe. At some point it starts to get to her so when the monsters head to the mall, Erin catches Ania drifting towards the girl’s section on her own. She’s high so she follows her around, prodding her about it. When Ania tells her, there’s this moment where Erin’s drug haze parts for a second. Ania could have sworn that she saw anger flashing in Erin’s eyes for half a second. She shrugs it off until Allison shows up at the dorms with a bruise on her jaw. Erin knows Ania hides her body bc scars and bc she doesn’t like men staring at her. She refuses to let Allison shame Ania into doing something she doesn’t want to. In general, Allison and Ania have a rocky relationship because Erin keeps interfering. After Christmas, the two of them end up getting along a lot better bc they bond while Allison covers Ania’s bruises with makeup. Also after Christmas, Ania and Renee trade dorms so she and Allison aren’t in constant contact. Part of their friction was due to the amount of time they spent together. A lot of things have happened to Allison this year and the fact that she constantly has to see the source of a lot of her problems makes it hard for her to heal.  

I’ve considered Fem!Nicky but I personally prefer Gay/Lesbian solidarity between him and Erin a lot better so yeah (However if you want me to run a few Fem!Nicky hcs, hmu and I’ll do it. She won’t be a part of the fem!verse but it would be fun). He’s exactly the way he is in canon. However, he is constantly trying to set Ania and Erin up and Erin? Doesn’t? Stop? Him? She’s so desperately in love with Ania that if Nicky wingmanning for her is what it takes to win her over, then she’ll take it. She also has a really dirty sense of humor. The jokes he makes fuel her late-night fantasies. 

Aaron is disgusted with Nicky and, more importantly, himself. Ania is incredibly beautiful and he’s incredibly straight. He doesn’t like her bc he’s so gone for Katelyn. That doesn’t make Ania any less pretty. He finds himself staring at her all the time but so does every other fox so he doesn’t feel bad. 

Katelyn thinks Ania is hot. She’s bi but leans heavily towards guys. It takes Aaron a long time to unlearn his homophobia but he manages it because Katelyn is bi and he couldn’t possibly hate anything about her. Once Riko is gone and Ania is safe, she starts to develop feelings. I mean, she always had feelings but now she doesn’t try to suppress them. She lets herself want to be friends with people. Katelyn happens to be at the top of her list. While the twins are with Bee at their sessions, Katelyn and Ania hang out. Sessions are only an hour/hour and a half long so the girls just grab a soda together or go window shopping in Reddin. I hc Katelyn as a genuinely sweet VSCO girl. Let me have this! Ania has a grunge/goth aesthetic because Erin buys her clothes for her but she thinks Katelyn’s clothes are cute too. Erin wants to hate the thousands of scrunchies and anklets she finds strewn across the dorm but they make Ania so happy. Once on a double date, on Bee’s insistence, Katelyn catches sight of a bubblegum pink scrunchie in Erin’s hair. It’s a stark contrast to her all-black outfit but it’s really cute. When Aaron goes to grab their drinks from the barista, Katelyn tells her so making sure to stay well out of Erin’s reach. Erin just grunts and turns to look out the window. The twins don’t blush with their whole face. Instead, their ears turn red. With Erin’s hair pulled up and out of the way, Katelyn has no trouble seeing her burning red ears. It’s progress! 

Ania spends a lot more time out at Evermore as a kid than Neil did. As a result, she was really close to Kevin and Riko. She only knew Jean for like a month before she dipped. I got a request for Fem!Jean so you’ll see Ania’s relationship with Jeanie soon. Kevin sees her as a baby sister. He and Kayleigh were actually at the hospital when Ania was born. There’s a baby photo back at Kayleigh’s old house of 3yr old Kevin carrying a newborn Ania. He’s crying rivers in it. There’s an actual video of it as well. In it, Kay asks him why he’s crying. “She’s sho shmall!” little Kevin sobs. “Can I keep her? Pleashe, mom. I’ll be nice to her and take care of her and I’ll tell her I love her all the time.” You can hear someone laughing in the background. The camera pans across the room to reveal Wymack sitting in a chair by the door, cackling

TANGENT BUT I WANT TO TALK ABOUT WYMACK FOR A MINUTE! So Wymack and Kay are friends with some obvious benefits. He flips his shit when Kevin is born because what if that’s his kid??? Kay is just like, I was with a lot of guys and brushes it off. She’s lying through her teeth. Wymack is the only man she’s ever loved. Tetsuji is salty and I will go into this in another post but I think that Tetsuji really hated Kevin because he was Kay’s son but not his. I absolutely believe that Tetsuji was in love with Kayleigh Day and was pissed when she had a kid. Anyway, Wymack flies out to Ireland a lot to check up on Kay and Kevin because Kay is crazy. How could the inventor of exy not be? It’s literally murder lacrosse. He goes out to make sure Kay isn’t overworking herself and bc Kev has no father figure. Kev grows up knowing Wymack and absolutely adores him. When Kay dies, Wymack wants custody of Kevin. Kay knows who the Moriyamas are and recently she and Tetsuji have been fighting a lot. She’s scared that something is going to happen to her so she writes her will and emphasizes that she wants her son sent to Wymack if she dies. Her fight with Tetsuji comes to a head and the car ‘accident’ happens. It’s not an accident. Tetsuji ordered her killed in a fit of rage. He’s devastated when it actually happens. He loved her and now she’s dead. Well, who’s fault is that, ya dumb bish? He flies out for the funeral and so does Wymack. Tetsu finds the will first and is anger. He has it burned and has Nathan forge a new one where he gets custody of Kev. It breaks Wymack’s heart bc now he thinks Kay didn’t want him around Kev. Kevin is five and he’s crying because his mom is dead and now he can’t live with Wymack. He calls Wymack Dad and Wymack can’t do anything about this. Instead, he just hugs little Kev close and tells him it’ll be okay. Wymack tells Kev that Tetsu has a niece his age. Maybe Kev and Riko can be friends. Maybe they’ll even get married. Kevin says that’s disgusting and Wymack laughs a hollow laugh. Anyway, that’s how Kev gets shipped to Evermore. Tetsu doesn’t allow Wymack near Kev bc he knows the truth. The reason why Wymack always has a sports channel on because he used to keep it on in case Kev ever showed up. He watched every one of Kev’s games and interviews and everything. Wymack doesn’t get to be there to watch Kev grown up so he just watched from a distance. I'm not crying you are. 

Wymack is a father figure to Ania and Erin. He’s there when Ania is born bc he went to visit Kay and Kev who were in Baltimore to meet baby Nathania. Kay carts him out to the hospital to meet her too. Nathan Wesninski was not in the room when his daughter was born. He doesn’t even meet her until she’s six months old. Wymack is the first man Nathania meets and she doesn’t even know. Mary didn’t want to hand Nathania over to Wymack but she and Kay are friends and she knows that he’s her baby daddy. Wymack doesn’t recognize Ania because he only knew her for a month when she was a newborn. Of course he doesn’t recognize her. However, he thinks about her a lot. She’s actually the first baby he’s ever held. He didn’t get to hold Kevin until he was two. Wymack treats Ania the same way he treats Neil but he puts in a bit of extra care bc he knows about Millport incident. 

Abby is definitely as much of a mom figure as she was to Neil. However, after she shows her her scars, Ania gets a lot closer to her. She refuses to tell her things but when Erin gets sent to Easthaven, Ania has a hard time staying at the dorms. She spends all her time at the court bc she has to. She hides in the library bc it’s the one place she wouldn’t see Erin anyways. She crashes at Abby’s a few times because there are times she can’t stand the thought of going back to the dorms without feeling the brush of Erin’s hand on the back of her neck. 

Oh. That’s a thing. Every night after midnight practice n Kev has gone to his room, Ania says goodnight to Erin. Erin will trail her hand across the back of Ania’s neck as she passes in response. It makes Ania shiver because her neck is as much of an erogenous zone as Erin’s is. Erin always watches it out of the corner of her eye bc God it’s the most amazing thing she’s ever seen. It makes her feel. Ania doesn’t really realize???? She’s so dumb. She knows it makes her feel good but she just can’t for the life of her figure out why. 

It’s time I addressed the real psycho lesbian… While Erin’s is a facade, Riko is genuinely psychotic. She’s seven types of crazy. Actually, it skews a little more yandere but I will go into depth about it in the Fem!Jean fic. Rn, I’ll try to keep it short. Riko has her first crush when she’s eight? Nine? She kisses her crush on the cheek when she’s ten and Tetsuji… doesn’t take it well to say the least. The bit about it’s easier to remain straight? It’s the thing Kevin hears Riko say to herself every morning in front of the mirror. Regardless, Riko never gets over that first crush. Riko will never not miss Nathania Wesninski. When she finds out who Ania really is? She loses it. It’s fate, she tells herself. She will have Ania or die trying. Christmas at Evermore is a thing so I mean, I guess she does have Ania :( But she wants Ania to love her. She tells Ania as much and Ania spits in her face. :)

Most of Erin’s relationships are the same except for the Matt and Renee thing I covered earlier. The only other one that changes is Kevin. I know I say this a lot, but she really thought Ania and Kev would be a thing. She says no to Kevin for everything bc she’s petty.  Kevin has always gotten everything that he wanted handed to him on a silver plate. Now he’s taking the one thing she really wants.  If he gets Ania, he can’t have anything else. Again, I’ll cover her relationship with Jean later. 

Thanks again your ask <3

Edit: I'm really tired and have a quiz tomorrow but I forgot to talk about Cleo. I'll make a separate post about her so stay tuned for that!!!

[obfuscateyummy]

Watch Your Back part 9

Happy Friday my friends! He’s some suspense for your start to the weekend :)

<3 thank you all for all your feedback, comments, likes, and reblogs. Ily all.

This weekend if everything goes into plan, I MIGHT have a sneak peak of a few other things i have planned for my family...we will see. NO PROMISES this time.

1336 words in Part 9. I...have no other words. 

*slight disclaimer for this and the next few parts: a lot of the medical stuff i am mentioning is what I know/learned from ER and Google. If anything is completely inaccurate let me know ;)*

Deep breaths, you reminded yourself. Don’t stress. Everything would be okay. You were trying to think your way out of the pain in your back moving around to your midsection. It wasn’t strong yet, but it was the second one you had that hour and the fifth one today. Your thought process was broken by your daughter, “Mami, can you help me build a castle for my princesses?” Macee asked.

“Of course, Mija,” you said as you got up. You whispered to your stomach, “Mijo, Emiliano, you have to stay in there a little longer.”

You played with your daughter, building a castle for her princess to live in.

“Mami, here, you be Princess Jasmine, and I be Princess Anna, okay?” Macee said as she handed you the toy.

You smiled as a strong contraction hit you, “OUCH!” You said in pain as you put a hand on your stomach, and your head down.

“Mami you okay?” Macee said as she crawled over to you.

“Yes, Mace,” you lied as you got up off the floor. You looked at the time and realized the contractions were getting closer. “Mami just needs to stand up for awhile okay?” You began to walk around the room. Almost pacing.

Sonny walked into the bedroom. He looked like he had seen a ghost.

“Sonny, you okay?” You asked him.

“We...we have to go. We have to go to the hospital,” he said in barely a whisper.

“Sonny what hap..” He didn’t allow you to speak before he said what you were waiting to hear.

“Nick. Nick he was shot,” Sonny said. “He was shot in his shoulder, right outside his vest.”

“What?” You said as another strong contraction hit you, as you bent over in pain.

Seeing you holding your stomach snapped Sonny out of his trance he was in since he heard the news. “Y/N? You okay?” Sonny said as he raced towards you.

“I’m fine,” you lied.    

“Mami,” Macee said as she held her lovey bear, “Is Uncle Nicky okay?”

You looked at Sonny not knowing what to say. “Hey Macegirl, your Uncle Nicky is the strongest guy I know,” Sonny said as he got down on his knees in front of her and picked her up. The three of you headed out the door.

—-

When you were in the car on the way to the hospital, another contraction hit you. “Fuck,” you mumbled under your breath, as you started taking the deep breaths.

“OH Mami, you said a bad word!” Macee said from the back seat.

“Y/N,” Sonny said as you cut him off.

“I’m fine,” you screamed.

“Are you having contractions?” Sonny said as he looked at you.

“It’s too early…” you said.

“How long have you been having them?” Sonny said.

“On and Off all day. They just started getting strong and close..” you said as you looked out the window.

“And you didn’t tell me? What if..” Sonny said.

“I was scared okay!” You said as you started crying.

Sonny parked the car in the parking lot of the hospital and looked at you, “Don’t cry. I don’t need Barba to kill me today,” Sonny said with a chuckle as you got out of the car.

As soon as you got off the elevator, Macee spotted Rafael. “PAPI!” She screamed as she ran to him.

“Oh, Macee, I have never been so glad to see you,” Rafael said as he picked up his child and held her close. As soon as he saw you, tears formed in his eyes, “Cariño, oh god I love you so much,” he said as he hugged you.

“Rafael.”

“I thought...Nick pushed me out of the way, I thought it was going to..” Rafael said as he buried his face in your neck.

“Abuela! Abuela!” Macee said reaching for your mom. Rafael put her down and she ran into her arms.

“Rafael,” you said again.

“Just let me hold you, mi amor,” Rafael said as he moved his hands over your stomach just as another contraction hit.

Your whole body tensed up as you screamed out in pain. “Y/N? Are you okay? Sit down amor.”

You started crying as the pain stopped and you spoke, “I’ve been having contractions all day. At first I thought they were Braxton-Hicks but they kept getting stronger and now they are 15 minutes apart now and I think we need to go to the hospital.” You said as you looked into his eyes.

He laughed at you, “Cariño, we are at the hospital,”

You smacked his arm, “Shut up! You know what I mean!”

—

Your mom agreed to keep Macee with her and Sonny. Rafael called to let Lucia know what was going on. When you got down there, they took you right in and started an IV to stop the contractions immediately. The medication started to work, and soon the contractions stopped.

“You’re dilated to 4. When we discharge you, you’re on bed rest,” the nurse said as she finished her latest rounds.

As soon as the doctor left, you broke down crying. Rafael grabbed your hand, “Hey, it’s going to be okay, he’s going to be okay,” Rafael said as he put his hand on your stomach.

“It’s not just this, it’s.... Rafi, I told Nick not to let you die,” you said in a whisper, “It’s my fault.”

“You know Nick would’ve done it anyways,” Rafael said as the door creaked open.

“Papi! Mami!” Macee said as she ran over to the two of you followed by Sonny. “Guess what? Uncle Nicky has a cool, big bandaid on his shoulder and he let me touch it!”

“Oh did he?” You said as you looked at Sonny.

“He wanted to know how you’re doing,” Sonny said.

“Tell him his legs aren’t broken, he can get down here and see me,” you said as you laughed.

Sonny chuckled and smiled, “I’ll tell him you’re good. Macee, come on, let’s go back to your Abuela, okay?”

“No! Stay!” Macee said as she clung to Rafael.

“Macee, come on, Abuela said you were going to stay with her,” Sonny said.

“STAY!” Macee screamed.

“Macee, you have to go with either Abuela or Abuelita. Which one?” Rafael said trying to get her to pick between Cesaria and Lucia.

“Papi!” Macee said.

“Let her stay, Raf. The contractions stopped, and she will probably fall asleep soon,” you said.

“Yay!” Macee said as she ran and got on the hospital bed with you. “Mami, I sleep with you?”

“No, Mace, you’re going to sleep with Papi over there,” you said as you pointed to the fold out couch.

“Why Papi no sleep with you?” Macee asked.

“Mami has to sleep here, so the medicine can keep me and Emiliano...safe,” you said as you looked at Rafael puzzled, trying to find the right words.

He nodded at you and came to get Macee, “Kiss Mami goodnight, Mija. Let’s go snuggle,”

Macee kissed you, and hugged your stomach, “I love you, Mami. I love you, Emiliano”

“I love you too, Macee, so does he. Good night,” you said as Rafael bent down to kiss you next.

“I love you, Cariño,” he said as his free hand touched your stomach, “and you too, Mijo.”

“Love you, Rafi.” You said.

—-

You woke up at 1:30 am and felt a rush of liquid flow down your leg. You whispered to try and wake up Rafael without waking Macee.

“Raf? Rafael? Rafi?” No response from your husband. Then a contraction hit, and you said louder, “Rafael Emiliano Barba!”

His full name woke up him. He got up, careful not to wake up Macee and came straight to your side.

“Cariño? Is something wrong?” He said

You grabbed his hand, “Call our parents, then get the doctor,” you said as you screamed and Macee started to wake up.

“Cariño, what’s..”

You didn’t let Rafael finish his sentence before you spoke, “My water just broke.” 

TAGGING: @serendiptious-esparza @whatmarisays @dreila03 @eggo-poppy @madpanda75 @lyssa1385 @fall-out-harto @sonnysdoll @childofbarisi @sweetsummertime99 @santa-feigh @sleepylunarwolf @damedoctoroftardis @reids-girl31699 

[thelouisianauproar]

Louisiana Uproar - Chapter 25

Summary: Dottie receives disheartening news about her father; The mob finds trouble brewing at Sammy’s Bar

By July 1971, The company was growing exponentially. The ristorante moved locations to renovate. The area in River Row has been gutted. Our intention is to come out with three locations by late 1971.

The plan changed from building an amusement park to a boardwalk with a ferris wheel. It puts less reliability on us and people had to pay for our space.

I have kept John by my side. Occasionally, we have used our resources to help each other on side projects. It works for us. The Senator continued to push for an investigation and Jonathan Maguire, FBI agent, was put on the case. I already hate that guy. “Morning, boss.” John and Jason are talking in Jason’s office. Yes, I moved John to my office. I pay him for his investigation.

“What are we looking at?” “This Maguire guy.” “Anything new?” “Leads.” John nods. 

“Oh good.” I pat the door before heading back to the hallway. “Dot.” Jason follows me. “Have you gotten to logo, the list of companies for rent, the-”

“Jason, I am locking myself in my office today to approve everything.” “Great.” He says, We’re walking back to my office in the penthouse.

“Good, I’ve got some people complaining about you.”

“I don’t care.” I sigh. When I get to my office the items are on my desk that need approval, in coloring. “Look at this shit.” “Yeah..” He looks around. “What have you been up to?” “Gearing up for the press release, the Ristorante moving, helping Camille track down Pat’s team to pay a delegate.” “Wow, okay, we knew this would be a busy time for you.” He nods. “We’re on the cusp of announcing, people are gonna start knocking at our door.” “Yes.” “We can’t lose our resolve.” “I’m not.” I take a seat. “Did you see that you have been placed on payroll?” “Yes---thank you. Why?”

“I’m hiring an attorney, and a finance guy.” I say, “We need to have no loose ends---considering.”

“Makes sense.” He nods. I put the different selections on the Jetson Group’s new logo. “Ha.” I laugh to myself seeing the three that made the cut.

“Marsha’s trying not to play too deeply in the Jetson theme, but we are of the future.” “You’ve been working with her. What’s your favorite?” Jason points to one. “Done.” I say. “We can take that off my list.”

I should check in with Nicki. Things have been different for her, entirely. She feels like she’s in the same routine and she’s bored. I, on the other hand, am satisfied.

“Nicki Burke.” She answers. “Oh. I was expecting your machine.” “Surprise.” “What are you doing tonight? Are you working?”

“Not too late. I don’t think.” “Why don’t we meet? We’ll go somewhere.” I wait for the rejection.

“You know what I’m gonna say.” So just say it. “When we go out, people feel the need to talk to us.” We never go out. “I don’t feel like it. Let’s stay inside and catch up.” “Okay.” I concede.

“I’ll be home soon.”

Of course, I get there before her. I’m trying to prepare the place for a night in in. I hear the door open and Nicki lets out a content sigh. I’m annoyed with her already. “Hey.” I am looking at her from the living room. “Hey.” She walks up to me and kisses me. “”I’ve been waiting all day for this.” “I’m glad.”I walk to open a bottle of wine.

“How was your day?” “Have you spoken with Ray?” “Not recently.”We both take a drink. “That’s good.” She nods. “Do you remember the Bar the black mob owned?” There were a few. “The one where my brother died.” “Sammy’s. Right.” “There was a ruckus out of there, the other night.” She shakes her head. “One of our guy’s daughter and her boyfriend was there.” What? “She made it out, he didn’t.” “That place is still torn down. Why were they there?” “I don’t know. I heard the place had blood everywhere. It had ‘covered in blood’ written in blood.” “I wish he would have told me. That’s something I should know about.” “Well, the mob didn’t do it.”

---

I’m curious about what is going on at Sammy’s bar. I drive by and the boards are taken off. No one seems to care; no cops, no news stories.

I have a lot more to deal with. All of us are taking turns handling mob business and the Jetson Group. I hate it. We now have a financial advisor and a legal advisor, but we need more organization.

“Dottie.” My current assistant, Stacy, calls me. “Stacy.” I answer. “Your father is on the line.” “Send him through.” “Good morning.” I answer. “Good morning, sweetheart.” I hear him on the line. “Is this a bad time?” “It will be. Soon.” I say, “What’s going on? This is early for you.” “I know. I’d like to see you soon.’ “Oh? What’s going on?” “It’s a nice day in D.C and I’d like to spend at least one with you.” He says, “The boardwalk can wait.” “I’ll see what I can do.”

“You hear anything about the Ensanglante?” “What’s that? I assume it’s a business.” I walk around my desk.

“I’d call them a cult. I heard Ray and his boys found it in an old bar in the Hollow.”

“I did hear about that.” I make two drinks. “Why Sammy’s bar?” Jason shrugs.”How did you find out?” “I know some people.” “I’m hearing it's not our problem.” I say, “This isn’t mob doing.”

“Continues to make New Bordeaux look dangerous.” “We are dangerous.” We toast.

That night, I stayed late at the office. If I was going out to D.C. I should get my work done.

“Hey.” John lets himself in my office. “You’re here late.” “I am. So are you.” He takes a seat. “I’m going to D.C for a little bit.” “Oh.” “My father would like to see me.” I pause, I feel the need to say, “I’m going alone.” “Ah, I see.” He pauses, “trouble in paradise?”

“Enough about me. How are you?”

“I’ve been playing Chess with this Maguire guy.” “From the investigation?” “Yes. I’m thinking they want to get enough information with this guy, bring it to committee---ah, those fucks just wanna look like they’re doing something.” “So, what have you been doing?” “Limiting him. Places I think he’ll look.” He starts to smoke. “Gotta give him credit, though. There’s not a place he won’t go.” “What do you know that he knows?” “He knows about Lincoln Clay.” He stays, that means he may know about me. “I’ve kept a close distance. Can’t get too close, or he may think it’s still going on.” “Okay.” There is a silence between us. “Worse comes to worse, what happens?” “They go to Committee. Blow hot air.” “Ruin my career.” I add. “Makes it more exciting.” I stand and prepare to get upstairs.

“Thank you, John.” “Trouble in paradise?” He asks, again. “That’s---” “You don’t seem happy.” “I’ve been happier.” We share a smile. “Goodnight.”

I’m debating on telling Nicki that I’m going to D.C---alone. I need to clear my head. “You’re still up.” I greet Nicki, she’s in the kitchen. “I am.” She pauses. “How was your day?” “Alright.” I say, “My dad called. He’d like me to come to D.C.”

“Oh?” “He wants to me come alone.” “Is everything alright?” “I don’t know, yet.” I fix my watch. “I’m going out there tomorrow.”

----

After my flight, I am picked up and taken to our home in Washington D.C. As I pass through the city, it has my attention, it’s changed so much. Just like New Bordeaux, I wonder who are the real bigwigs who run this place.

“Hey!” My father greets me with a hug. “How was the flight?” “It was quick. I slept.”

“Good.” He helps take my bag, inside. “Martha and your brother are out. We’ll meet ‘em for dinner.” “Alright.” We walk to my old bedroom.

“You get ready and we’ll head over there.”

“Sure.”

Things feel so different. I had only just been home four months ago. My father looks like he’s aged and lost a bit of weight.

After dinner, I called to get an update about work. I spoke to Nicki. “You’re still up.” I say while coming to the kitchen. “I am.” He has a drink. “Help yourself.” “Thanks.” I start a drink. “It’s nice to be home.” “You in with the mob?” “What?” I turn to face him and he looks at me, expectantly.

“Are you working with the mob?” It’s so matter of face. “Dorothy Jetson. They are opening an investigation on New Bordeaux in 1968. I know David Danna took over. Sources are saying you’re affiliated with him. I keep seeing some pictures of you and his associates.” There is a silence between us. “I get it. You’re a business owner. Black. You needed some help so you took a loan from them? Is that what happened?” I’m insulted.

“This is just like you. You and your white horse.” I shake my head. How dare he? He’s my father and he thinks I need to be coerced? “If you don’t tell me, I can’t help you.” “Don’t say that, again. I don’t need your help.” I look him in the eye. “I don’t need saving. I never did. You did. You always mean to save someone.” “Don’t make this about me.” “Oh, it’s always been about you.” I look away and at my drink. I swallow it, thinking of how people kept suggesting I go home while they tackled Marcano. Look at me, now. “Is there a scenario that you don’t talk about yourself? You are standing up here trying to save me from something...you never really knew.” He’s silent. “What is this, huh? You take me in and you become the big guy? It will only embarrass you and the thought saddens me that you can’t appreciate it.”

“Who are you?”

“Your daughter, Dad.” I say, “The one that you toughened up, because you thought I needed to know how to survive in this world. Guess what? I’ve seen some shit and I got here. I did it.” There is a confusion on his face. “What have you done, Dot?” “What I had to do. That’s the job.” “I suppose it is.”

“Dot? Fitz? Is everything alright?” “It’s fine.” He calls up. “Just like you, I want this.” I say, with a forced sigh. “I respect you, Dad, but if you come after me. I’ll hit you hard. I am an excellent shot.” He shakes his head. “Goodnight.” “Goodnight.”

---

I kept my distance from the family. I can’t believe I allowed myself to get so upset. He brings that out of me, he always has.

In the middle of the night, I heard someone come to my room. “Did I wake you?” “No.” “Let’s get a dink.” “Alright.”

I met him in the living room, where he is pouring two drinks. “Dorothy. Sit down.” Like a teenager, I take a seat and cross my arms. “You have always been one of my favorite people.” He says, “Smart, conversationalist, it’s just a couple of the million things that I love about you---including your leadership.” He passes me the drink. “Hey, Dot, you may want me for an ally, alright?” He has a point. Fitzgerald Jetson, Sr has gotten both innocent people, and career gangsters off their charges.

“They think you’re being coerced. They may ask you to testify.”

“Hmm.” We drink. “I’m gonna be candid with you. I expect the same.” “So you can save me?” “So I can help you.” He says, “Look. I’ll do what I can. I’ll tell you what I know.” “What do you know?” “About Sammy’s bar after a robbery, the blood shed, we have a name---Lincoln Clay.” “Oh.” “You know, I had an idea that all of this had something to do with you.” He says, “I’d hoped you would have called me if you were in trouble, but you weren’t. You even live with Clay’s accomplice daughter.” “I…” I force myself to down my drink. “I can’t do this.’ “You can’t trust me? Or you can’t look at me when you say it.” “I ran his books.” “Whose?” “Lincoln Clay’s.” “Oh.” He looks shaken. “I didn’t think you---all those people, Dot.”

I feel terrible. The look on his face is killing me.

“Do you want some water?” “Yes.”

I’ve never broken his heart before. In fact, I have always done exactly what he’s told me. He’s just looking into the distance, when I return with his water.

“You sat there in all of that.” He lets out a hard breath. “Did you enjoy it?” “No.” “You say he didn’t make you, so why?” He’s got this nervous energy. “I...felt s-strong...l-like like I was taking my power back.” “You use politics to do that.” He presses his fist to his lips. He finally cries. “I’m sorry.” I whisper. I want to touch him.

“I--I swear to god. I always wanted the best for you. I---” My poor old man.

“It’s not your fault.” “I’m desperate here, Dottie.” I walk over to sit next to him. I shouldn't be with him, right now. “Is this some kind of joke? You’re my baby!”

I hardly considered the pain that this would cause my family. Why did I tell him? I could have just lied.

---

“Morning.” Martha greets me. “You father isn’t well.” “Yeah.” “Your roommate called for you. She said you haven’t checked in.” “So much excitement.” “Yes...I’m sorry about your father, too. I really want us to work together.” “Excuse me?” “He said he’d tell you last night. About his cancer.”

Just like that, the floor shakes from under me. “We digressed.” I put my hand up. “Oh, I’m sorry, Dottie.” She pulls a chair for me to sit. “What do we have to do?” “It’s quite advanced.” “It is?” I roar as I start to cry. “Shhhh. Shhh. He’s resting.” She tells me. “He can get chemotherapy, but there is guarantee.”

“I don’t know what to say.” “Don’t tell you father that I told you.” “I won’t.” I pause. “Where is it?” “His brain.” Oh, god damn it.

“Burke-Jetson residence.” “Hey, it’s me.” “I thought you were running away.”

“No, of course not.” “What’s going on over there/” “He has cancer.” “What?” “My father has cancer.” I can’t even get it out. “His brain.” “Oh, Dot, I-” She pauses, “I’m so sorry.” “Me too.” I cry to her for a while. “I need to get back to New Bordeaux.” “Don’t run. Your father needs you. That’s important. Trust me.” “No, trust me. I’m the last person who should be there for him.” “What’s going on?”  I hear someone clear their throat.  It’s my father. “I have to run.” I hang up the phone.

“Leaving me?” “For now.” I let out a breath. “You don’t have to.” “I fucked up. Now, I signify something terrible for you, and at a time that I just want you to rest.” “Rest? You know, don’t you?” “Know what?” “No wonder you hide in New Bordeaux. Still a terrible liar.” He pats next to him, so I sit.

“You’d be surprised.” “Is that supposed to make me feel special?”

“You don’t...feel special given everything that has happened in your life, up to this moment?” “I suppose that’s right.” He clears his throat. “I will never understand you...and I’m going to die. Soon.” He lets out a breath.  

“There’s a-” he doesn’t look like he wants to hear it, so I stop.

“I don’t want you anywhere near Martha, or your brother.” He tells me. “Take care of them. Make it so she doesn’t have to work again, and he gets through College.”

“I will.” “Good. Go home.” He kisses my forehead. “Call me when you get back back. Don’t leave a message with Martha. Call me.” He pauses. “If I hear anything about the committee. I’ll ask you to come home for dinner.”

“I understand. Thank you.” “It’s gonna go to committee, baby.” He tells me. “They need to make it look like they are doing something.”

---

[sebastianstanimagines]

Chance Encounter

Imagine you encounter Seb in New York

Pairing: Sebastian Stan x Reader

One-shot/Chapter: One-shot

Notes/Rating: M, adult situations, language

I was in New York with my hip hop dance troupe for the World Hip Hop Dance Championships. We were performing Starstruck by Lady Gaga. It was all nerves. I found myself on more than one occasion jumping up and down. I went off stage of the venue and put my headphones in my ears and rehearsed our dance. I felt like I was messing up too much so I stopped and went outside in the cool air for a cigarette. “Hey, 15 minutes to show time”. “Thanks, Christine”. I walked in, after shaking my hands vigorously. “You alright?” “Yeah. Just nerves”. She put both her hands on my shoulders. “Look at me. You’re going to do great. We’re going to do great”. I looked up at the ceiling, took in a deep breath and met her gaze. “Okay.” I stood in the front of my troupe, listening as the announcer called us up. “Now or never”. I whispered to myself. I ran out on that stage ready for the performance of my life. We ended up winning the championship so we were celebrating New York City style: getting shit-faced drunk. I still had too many nerves from the entire night so I wasn’t drinking that much. My friends had gone out on the dance floor. How the hell they wanted to dance after that, I’ll never know. Might’ve felt good to dance how you felt and not to a routine. Besides, I was in 4 inch heels and a long red V-cut dress. I was not dancing. I had the shot glass at my lips when my eyes went of their own accord to the left. I saw someone standing at the end of the bar. I took a quick glance as I took the shot. I nearly choked. No. There was no way. There was no way Sebastian Stan was at the end of the bar staring at me. I ordered another shot and took another flitting glance to where I thought he’d been standing. Nothing. Okay. I was seeing things. Major whew. My friends came over to me, almost falling over themselves. They were hammering me to dance. “Guys. No. I’m good.” “Come on! We want to see you dance!” I laughed. “You just did.” “Please!” They played a cruel joke on me before they had come to get me. They asked the DJ to play Pound the Alarm by Nicki Minaj and when I heard that song, I couldn’t help but dance to it like I knew how: like a boss. I had been smart and kept my tights and tank top on underneath my dress. I pulled the dress up in one fluid motion. As I had my arms up to take my head out from the dress, my eyes again went to the left. He was there again! I held his gaze for a second, then turned towards my troupe. The music started and I lost myself in it. After some time, we made our way outside, tripping over each other, laughing hysterically. I still had a beer bottle in my hand. I had my back turned to the door and I wish someone would’ve warned me. My friends suddenly got quiet and were staring behind me, their mouths open. “What?” I furrowed my brows as I brought the bottle to my lips. That was when I felt a hand on my shoulder. I spun around, eyes going wide. I turned to the side quickly, spitting out my beer all over my friend. “Oh, fuck me.” It came out so quick I had no time to censor myself. I saw his eyes jerk for a quick second before he gave one of those knee-softening laughs. I suddenly remembered my friend. I turned to see her wiping herself off, laughing. “I’m so sorry.” “I ain’t even mad. The look on your face was priceless. You know who that is right?” I stared at her, turning my head to look at Sebastian. I barely held down an excited sequel/panicked horror. “That’s Sebastian Stan” pointing my finger in his direction.  She started laughing, and turning to look back at Sebastian, I found him laughing. I felt something irritating my face and realized there must still be beer on my chin. I quickly wiped it off, feeling ridiculous. “We knew you would know who that was. Just wanted to see how drunk you were”. I turned back to them, incredulous. “Did you set this up?” Oh, hell no. We just know how much you like him. It surprised us too when we saw him behind you.” I turned once again back to face Sebastian, my face bright red. “I am so sorry. This is so embarrassing. There we were. Standing in a group. With Sebastian Stan next to me. I just wanted to get out of there. I felt so stupid. This was not how I wanted my first encounter with Sebastian to go. My friends were staring at him. I kept my eyes on them because I couldn’t bear to look at him. “Do you mind if I catch a ride with you?” Was he serious? “Please forgive me if this sounds incredibly rude, but you surely came here with someone? What happened to them?” He looked down, clicked his tongue, then looked back at me, his lip in his teeth. Oh sweet Jesus. Not the lip thing. “Well, you’re here.” My eyes instantly went wide as I looked slowly to my friends. Did I die and go to heaven? Felt like it. My friends all exchanged glances, then looked back to me. “We’ll see you later, Roxi.” I caught myself before I reached out to them. To beg them not to leave me alone with him. The nerves caught up then and mixed with the alcohol, made me feel like I was going to fall. I felt Sebastian’s arm around my shoulder, like he was leaning on a buddy for help after drinking too much. “Did you drive here?” It took me a minute to respond to him. “N-no.” “Good, because you’re not driving now. Where are you staying?” “Casblanca Hotel Times Square”. He sucked in a breath. “Oooh, nice.” “Yeah. The venue put us up nicely.” I said with a smile. He gave a shrill whistle and it seemed like a taxi appeared in seconds. giving the name of my hotel when the driver asked where to. Okay. You got this. He’ll get you to the hotel and it’ll be over. He won’t remember you. The cab ride was quiet He was looking at me as I stared at the window at the city lights. I met his gaze a few times and we shared a smile. I was afraid of saying something stupid. The cab pulled up in front of the hotel. Sebastian got out and ran over to my side of the cab. I had my dress and heels back on and the last thing I needed was to fall flat on my face in front of him. I took his hand and gripped it as I stepped out of the cab. He brought me into his body, a hand at the small of my back. His hand went from where he was holding my hand to lacing his fingers into mine. I looked at him. Face to face. So close. I quickly backed up before I leaned in all the way to kiss him. I turned to start walking in. Sebastian paid the cab and caught up to me. “What room are you?” “204.” “How weird. I’m 203.” “Really?” Panic started to set in again. The damage was done when he had laced his fingers with mine. The things this man did to me. It was criminal, now I was right next door to him?! Sebastian followed me into the elevator. I was really trying hard to keep distance between us. I closed my eyes, rubbing the back of my neck in an effort to focus on something else. I couldn’t decide if I wanted to drink more or pass out. I rolled my head to stretch out my neck, grabbing the metal bar behind me for stability as the elevator began to climb up. When my head was centered, I opened my eyes. Sebastian was right in front of me. I didn’t have any time to react as he grabbed my face with both hands and kissed me hard. My hands white-knuckled the metal bars lining the back of the elevator. Our lips parted with that sound where you knew it was a good kiss. That skin sticking, audible lips parting sound. I let my breath out slowly, eyes closed. I felt his forehead touch mine, his breathing ragged as well. “Why did you do that?” I asked softly, breath shaky.. “Because you looked like you needed it and I wanted to do it the second I saw you. You’re lucky I didn’t lick the beer off your chin.” I nearly choked. I was losing the battle to keep my hands to myself. The elevator door opened again, his arm back around my shoulders. We got to his room first. “Well, it’s been fun. Goodnight.” I said to him, turning to leave. He caught my hand in his. “Stay with me.” My head snapped up to look at him. “Sebastian, I need to get some sleep.” It was such a lame ass excuse, but there was no way Sebastian Stan was asking me to stay the night with him. “Just stay with me, dork.” He said, laughing while he pulled me into his room. Okay. I guess this was happening. I crossed the threshold into his hotel room and felt like I was in a forbidden zone. I was dreaming. There was no possible way this should be real. The alcohol caught up with me, blurring my vision, my hands starting to go numb. Leaning against the wall for support, I looked to Seb who was looking at me, a cute expression on his face. I laughed, my face turning red as I hid my face in my hands. I looked up, jerking a thumb behind me to the bathroom.

“Um…I’m just going to freshen up. Alcohol’s starting to get to me.”

He flashed one of those killer smiles and extended his hand in a “please” motion.

I didn’t close the door all the way when I went into the bathroom. The alcohol was raging full force in me now. I tended to get goofy and confident when I was drunk. I splashed cold water on my face, patting it dry in an effort to bring myself back to reality. I was holding onto the counter encasing the sink for stability when I felt his face in my hair, his warm breath gracing my ear. I straightened, my arm instinctively coming up to wrap around his neck. I let my head fall back onto his shoulder, his lips placing soft kisses along the side of my neck. His hand came to my throat, long velvet fingers cupping it. My knees were weak, shaking as they struggled to hold up my body. I was completely at his mercy. I couldn’t have made him stop even if I wanted him to. I fisted my hand in his hair when he bit my neck, a growl escaping his lips, feeling his cock hardening and twitching into my back. His left hand trailed up the arm I had pulled back to his,head, leaving goosebumps in its wake. He curled his fingers into the hand that was tangled in his hair, pulling it away slowly. He put our arms out in front of us, fiddling with my wedding ring. He pulled my hand to his lips, my ring finger going into his mouth. I couldn’t tear my eyes away from the erotic display anymore than I could help the desire to feel that tongue in between my legs. His tongue licked my finger before his teeth grabbed hold of my ring.  perfectly positioning in between his top and lower jaw. He tossed the ring into the sink before moving in front of me, grabbing me and pressing me into him. He backed me up against the wall, my hands above my head, held together at the wrists. His hand was still cupped at my throat. I felt his lips at my ear. “I don’t think you’ll be needing that”, he whispered deeply and huskily.

[artificialqueens]

Girl I Met On The Internet, 5/6 (Crystal x Gigi) - Strawberry

a/n these chapters aren’t really that long but i keep taking forever to get them written and edited lol but anyway i hope ya’ll enjoy!! 

Gigi stayed at Crystal’s house for a while after their kiss. Crystal showed Gigi all of the art that was not yet hanging up on her walls, gave her a house tour, and introduced her to her cat Tic Tac, who Gigi instantly fell in love with. 

Gigi finally had to go when Crystal said her mom was on her way home from work, and would not be happy with Crystal if she found out she had someone over without permission. 

“Are you sure you’ll be fine walking home?” Crystal asked, watching Gigi put her shoes back on from where she was standing in the kitchen.

“Yeah, don’t worry. I live like, two streets down, actually so I’ll be there in like five minutes!” Gigi reassured her.

They hugged goodbye, Crystal walking her out and standing on her front porch until Gigi went out of sight. A few minutes later, Gigi messaged her.

gigi: i’m home and i miss ur cat

crystal: :o only tic tac??? not me??

gigi: yeah <3

crystal: you’re a loser

To Crystal’s disappointment, she didn’t hear from Gigi again until much later. Crystal had been debating getting off TikTok and going to sleep early for once when Gigi finally messaged her back. 

gigi: do u wanna facetime

crystal: YEAH!

Crystal balanced her phone on her history textbook that was still laying on her bed and grabbed Tic Tac, knowing Gigi would love seeing the cat again. 

“Hi!” Gigi waved, gasping when she saw Tic Tac in frame. “Who’s the cutest cat ever?”  

Gigi showed Crystal her room and her closet. Eventually, they both exited the FaceTime app to go on Twitter, but stayed on the call. They made it their mission to annoy the other girls by spamming them with pictures of frogs and other memes they had found funny.

crystal: frog in a hat frog in a hat

nicky: why not sheep? they are the superior animal!

crystal: No <3 but i fuck with you for trying

Jackie: Does this happen often?

nicky: crystal and gigi are always on some bullshit. just ignore them queen

jan!: nicky pls stop trying to steal jackie 

nicky: i simply breathed

“Hey, I think I’m going to bed,” Crystal yawned, “I’m tired. I would’ve been asleep by now if you didn’t want to talk.”

“Wait, before you go, do you maybe want to walk to school together tomorrow?” Gigi asked, coming back onto the app to see Crystal’s face.

Crystal smiled. “Yeah, that’d be nice.”

“Great! I’ll message you in the morning. Goodnight, ba- bitch!”

Being so tired, Crystal almost didn’t catch Gigi’s slip up. “Goodnight, Gigi.”

Being just friends was going to be difficult, Crystal decided before finally allowing herself to fall asleep.

-

Walking to school became Gigi and Crystal’s new thing. With Crystal’s mom’s permission, Gigi would join Crystal after school on days she didn’t have practice, often staying for dinner. Crystal’s mom met Gigi a week after they started doing this, and was very skeptical the first time she met Gigi, not expecting Crystal to have befriended a cheerleader, but quickly welcomed her with open arms.

After Gigi had dinner with Crystal and her mom, her and Crystal went back into Crystal’s room to get some homework done. Gigi’s mom requested her to come home after Gigi and Crystal finished Gigi’s algebra homework. They were both pretty bad at math, but Crystal insisted if they worked together they would be able to figure it out, which was debatable at best.  

“I don’t want to go. I’m too comfy,” Gigi complained, not wanting to get up from Crystal’s bed.

“You have to. Sorry.” Crystal replied, making Gigi stick her tongue out at her.

A few moments later, Gigi sat up, remembering that she wanted to ask Crystal something. “Hey, so before I go, I was thinking…”

“You think?” Crystal teased, giggling. Gigi gasped in mock offense, throwing a pillow at her head.

“Anyway, as I was saying,” Gigi continued, “I was thinking that we should have lunch together tomorrow. Only talking to you in the halls is not enough.”

“Yeah, of course! Do you want to meet me in the art room then?” Crystal asked, shutting her textbook and turning to face Gigi. 

“No. I’ll come meet you outside your class. What happens next is a surprise.”

Those words replayed in Crystal’s brain for the rest of the night. A conversation that happened in the group chat when Crystal was in the shower got her even more excited.

gigi: guys guess what

jan!: yeah??

gigi: i miss crystal :(

jan!: weren’t you at her house like an hour ago

heidi: hold up WHAT

heidi: miss gigi was WHERE????

jaida: what now

gigi: JAN SHUSH you ruined my reveal!!!

jaida: JAN YOU KNEW THIS??? and didn’t wish to share???

jan!: uh-

heidi: not a reveal DHGJSDH

gigi: i’m gonna ask crystal out and then after that i was gonna send a selfie of us revealing that we are dating AND that we live in the same town and everyone would lose their minds at the superior couple

jaida: now why would you announce that if she’s in here

gigi: SHIT

gigi: everyone spam the chat she doesn’t read up 

jan!: SUPERIOR COUPLE?? HELLO???

jan!: stealing your idea. we aren’t dating yet but look at me and jackie :-) 

nicky: I HEARD JACKIE IM HERE

jaida: nicky why do you hit on everyone who’s not available dgfhfj first gigi, and then you were a crystal stan and now this

nicky: why are you acting like this is a problem jai

Jackie: I find it hilarious. Jan only reserves that side of her when Ariana Grande posts a selfie. I’m chopped liver to her.

jan!: JACKIE THAT’S A LIE DHJBFDKH WHY DO YOU ONLY COME IN HERE TO BULLY ME

Jackie: ;)

gigi: jackie’s using emojis we did it gays

nicky: i am a homewrecker. jaida, find a partner and i will flirt with you too

heidi: nicky literally no one asked

jaida: well damn.. 

jaida: hey heidi you single??

heidi: NOT THISIDHDGKJS

Crystal usually didn’t read up, due to pure laziness and the fact that these girls could send fifty messages a minute if they wanted to. It was too much for Crystal sometimes. This time she decided to read up, and she was glad she did. They didn’t try hard enough to hide anything Gigi said, and Crystal was even more excited for the next day.

-

Crystal got up extra early that morning, putting more effort than she usually would on taming her curly hair and put on a tad bit more makeup than usual. She searched her closet for the perfect outfit, and finally picked out a hot pink jumpsuit with purple flowers on it, with a headband with the same design on it to match. 

She loved what she saw when she finally looked at herself in her full length mirror. Crystal knew this was going to be a good day; she looked good, and Gigi was going to ask her out during lunch. She was so excited.

gigi: im on ur street!

Crystal tried her best to mask her excitement as she walked down the hall and out the front door, not wanting Gigi to know she was aware of her plan.

“You look so cute!” Gigi exclaimed as soon as she saw Crystal.

“Thanks! You do too, we match!” Crystal replied.

Gigi was wearing a pink floral shirt with white shorts, and Crystal thought she looked very nice. Gigi always did, but it didn’t appear that she put in any extra effort, unlike Crystal did.

Crystal didn’t let that upset her, she told herself that the way Gigi dressed probably wouldn’t affect anything Gigi had planned. 

Due to Crystal’s impatience, the morning felt much longer. When the bell signaling that it was lunch finally rang, Crystal couldn’t hide the gigantic grin on her face if she tried. Right outside the doorway stood Gigi, and two other girls who were on the cheerleading squad. Crystal found this odd, but made her way over anyway.

“Hey, you ready?” Gigi asked, giving Crystal a quick hug. “This is Rosy and this is Symone,” Gigi said, motioning to the other girls. “I want you to meet them so we’re all having lunch together!”

Realization hit. There was no date, Crystal was way off. She really hoped her face didn’t show her disappointment. She tried to ignore it, Crystal was curious to meet Symone and Rosy. Gigi had mentioned them briefly before, but they must’ve been close if Gigi was introducing them.

“Just with you guys? Not Dahlia?” 

“Nope, she has a dentist appointment.” Gigi confirmed, and the four of them took off to the cafeteria.

Lunch was surprisingly nice. Rosy and Symone were way nicer than Dahlia ever had been to Crystal. Symone liked to paint, and Rosy loved Harry Styles so there was much for Crystal to discuss with them. Crystal didn’t like them as much as she liked her internet friends, but she couldn’t say they didn’t exceed her expectations. Crystal wondered why Gigi wasn’t always surrounding herself with cheerleaders like Rosy and Symone, who were genuinely nice and positive, but that would be a question for another time. 

Despite lunch going better than expected, Crystal was sad that she was so off about what Gigi had planned. She felt stupid, even though none of what Gigi had said hinted to only inviting Crystal to have lunch with her friends on the squad.

-

On their way to Crystal’s house, Gigi could tell something was off with the green haired girl. She was going to get to the bottom of it. 

“What’s wrong, babe?” Gigi asked once they got in Crystal’s room, both of them sitting on the bed. 

“It’s stupid, don’t worry about it. I’ll be fine,” Crystal lied, busying herself by petting Tic Tac, who had jumped up to join them on the bed.

“It’s not stupid if it’s bothering you.” Gigi pushed, wanting to help.

Crystal took a deep breath, and let it all out. “What are we, Gigi? We said we’d be just friends for now but I thought you were going to take me on a date during lunch today since you told the group chat about your plan but I was wrong!” 

Gigi had to take a moment to process everything. “I was going to try to clear that up by taking you on a date during spring break.” She admitted, making Crystal’s eyes go wide.

“Fuck… I’m sorry, I just-” Crystal mumbled, feeling awful,

“That’s why I wanted you to meet my other friends.” Gigi continued, “I think I’m going to come out to them before spring break.”

Crystal was shocked, “Gigi, spring break is next week. Are you sure about this?”

“Yeah. I need to. I talk to them about you all the time and I think they’re starting to get suspicious.” Gigi blushes.

“Even Dahlia?”

“Yeah, but she’s moving this summer so she’ll be out of her hair soon enough.”

“I think this is the best day ever, honestly.” Crystal giggles, leaning forward to press a kiss to Gigi’s cheek, making her whine.

“No. On the lips.” Gigi pouted. 

“I don’t kiss before the first date, Georgia Rose.” Crystal teases. 

“You’re so stupid!” Gigi huffs, tackling Crystal onto her bed, tickling her sides until she thought Crystal had enough. When Gigi finally stopped, Crystal lied there for a moment, still giggling even though Gigi’s manicured fingers weren’t on her anymore. 

“You’re so mean! I didn’t deserve that.” 

“You’re the one who wouldn’t kiss me!” Gigi whined again, flipping Crystal off.

“Don’t stress. G. Spring break will be here before we know it.”

[evil-diabolical-oops]

About Aaron

Here’s the thing about Aaron Minyard: he just wants to be normal (whatever that is). Or special, perhaps, but in the positive ways of being special: intelligent, good-looking, and appreciated. He doesn’t want to be associated with those he perceives to be losers, but the universe has conspired against him. He wasn’t born into a normal family, and things haven’t improved much since then.

I’ve talked about Aaron and the maturation plot before, but didn’t hit on some things in that discussion that I’d like to dig into now. The maturation plot is about going from a narrow, self-centered view of the world to realizing the world doesn’t revolve around you and learning how to navigate that larger world. Character change in the maturation plot is gradual, not sudden. It’s also about learning that you can’t rely on someone else (normally parents, but in Aaron’s case Andrew) to take care of you for the rest of your life. In the previous post, I discussed Aaron’s need for love and freedom from Andrew. In this one, I’m going to deal with his motivation to be normal.

Since you can’t talk about Aaron in this fandom without a crowd yelling about his homophobia, let’s start with that.

Aaron & Homophobia

“Thank you,” Neil said belatedly. “Huh? Oh, no. Don’t worry about it. You can make it up to me some other time when the others aren’t around.” “Can you try and get ass when I’m not standing right here?” Aaron asked. “You could leave and let me and Neil get to know each other better.” “I’ll tell Erik on you.” “Bald-faced lie. When’s the last time you said a civil word to him?” Neil didn’t know any Foxes past or present with that name. “Who is Erik?” “Oh, he’s my husband,” Nicky said happily. “Or will be, eventually. He was my home-stay brother for a year in Berlin and we moved in together after graduation.”

“Ja,” Nicky said. “You heard us earlier with the mumbo-jumbo, right? That was German. The little punks studied it at high school because they knew I could help them pass. If you take German as your elective here, just let me know and I’ll tutor you. I’m good with my tongue.” “Enough. Let’s play,” Aaron said, putting the bucket of balls down.

Let’s unpack some things about Aaron’s behavior here.

1. Aaron’s internalized homophobia

I am of the opinion it exists. I do think Aaron is very much “I don’t mind if you’re gay just don’t be so in front of me.”

“Can you try and get ass when I’m not standing right here?” Aaron asked.

It’s easy to look at lines like this and read them as purely homophobic and move on. But that’s oversimplifying.

2. Aaron resents Nicky abandoning him when he went to Germany

One common fandom belief is that Aaron is resentful of Nicky abandoning him alone with Tilda while Nicky ran off to Germany. Is that why he doesn’t like Erik? Or is it homophobia? Maybe he doesn’t like Erik’s sunny well-adjusted attitude. We don’t know.

3. Aaron wants to be normal

Aaron and the culture he grew up in probably doesn’t see being gay as “normal.” Nicky’s actions are calling attention to the fact that he’s not “normal,” and Aaron doesn’t want to be around that. Aaron doesn’t want to stick out. That’s feedback into point number one. Some people would lump it under homophobia. It is, but I want to stress that his motivation is not wanting to deviate from the norm. Because it gets a little bit more complicated than that.

The Foxes first group meeting in TFC:

“The death threats were creative, though,“ Nicky said. "Maybe this time they’ll follow through and actually kill one of us. Let’s vote. I nominate Seth.” “Fuck you, faggot,” Seth said. “I don’t like that word,” Andrew said. “Don’t use it.” “I would say ‘fuck you, freak’, but then you wouldn’t know which one of you I was talking to.” “Don’t talk to us at all,” Aaron said. “You never have anything useful to say.”

Aaron’s homophobia goes strangely absent. It’s not his battle. He doesn’t have to speak up here at all. You could speculate his homophobia isn’t that strong to begin with. And/or you could speculate there is a priority to it. Family generally wins (that deal with Andrew which Aaron stands by here but not at pesky times when Andrew wants him to), especially family against people Aaron considers to be losers. This is why I think it is his need to be normal and not homophobia that is the underlying drive for his actions.

But in the cases involving Nicky and Neil, Nicky’s actions/flirting are also a bit over-the-top, overly sexual, and don’t respect boundaries. Neil has already said he doesn’t swing, but in the passage at the start Nicky is still trying. Aaron finds Nicky’s behavior embarrassing, not just because he’s gay, but also because he’s making a spectacle of himself and hanging all over someone who doesn’t want him. Aaron doesn’t want to be embarrassed in front of others. 

Why else would Aaron care about this type of behavior? Let’s look to Tilda.

4. Aaron’s mommy issues

We don’t know much about Tilda, but she wasn’t a good mother. We get the sense there were a lot of men coming and going in Aaron’s life. So many that she had to broaden her radius and that’s how Andrew’s and Aaron’s worlds end up colliding. Perhaps she was overly flirtatious with these men and that’s why Aaron hates that behavior. It’s not like he was shielded from it either. It’s conjecture, but it’s not far-fetched.

At the very least, it was probably a bit humiliating for him to realize that she showed them more affection than she showed motherly affection to him. Her behavior was embarrassing, and all Aaron wanted was to be normal. Have I driven that point home enough yet? Sorry, I’m not done.

Let’s look at another favorite passage people use to prove Aaron’s homophobia:

“What?” Neil asked. “Just wondering how you went from your whole I-don’t-date high horse to Andrew’s bed,” Aaron said. “Either you were lying to us to hide the fact you’re a flamer, or you saw Drake rape Andrew and realized he’s easy prey.”

This is at the cabin when Aaron is gauging Neil’s feelings for Andrew. The use of "flamer” is definitely a slur. But Aaron is betting a lot (his happiness with Katelyn) on getting a reaction out of Neil. His words are meant to be as inflammatory as possible. I think it’s actually hard to say how much he means it as a slur he believes in and how much he means it to help get a reaction out of Neil.

Because you also have this following Neil punching him in reaction:

Despite his cruel words, his expression was calm and searching. Neil had the distinct feeling he’d been had, but that didn’t soothe his outrage any.

Aaron isn’t feeling very passionate about what he just said. They were words meant to hurt, not words with deep-held beliefs.

Aaron & PDA

I’m of the opinion that Aaron spends most of the series somewhat averse to PDA, in large part because of point number four above. His mother ruined it for him. He keeps his PDA fairly tame and standard: hand holding, cuddling on the couch, a kiss goodnight. Why am I bothering to point this out?

Near the end of the series after a win against the Bearcats:

Aaron was one of the first off the court. He shoved his racquet at Nicky and dropped his helmet and gloves on his way to the cheerleaders. Katelyn tossed her pom-poms aside at his approach and jumped into his waiting arms to kiss him. The Vixens bounced around them, cheering and waving to the crowd.

I think that this is a huge growth moment for Aaron. It’s a sign that he’s shifting his view on what’s normal. This level of PDA doesn’t have to be embarrassing. It can be heartfelt and exciting. A moment of shared joy.

Admittedly some of the perceived PDA hesitance could be the limit of Neil’s POV and Aaron hiding Katelyn because of his deal with Andrew. This isn’t central to my discussion, though, if you don’t agree with it. 

Aaron & Being “Normal”

Aaron couldn’t hold onto his view of normal forever because it wasn’t realistic. What changed? When does Aaron cross the threshold of what he perceives to be normal with no possibilty of return?

The moment he kills Drake.

Normal people don’t kill others. It is certainly justified, but it’s also a life-changing event. After that, he sees Andrew differently, understands him a little better. Probably sees himself differently. It’s a moment he can’t take back, wouldn’t take back, and can only move forward from.

He’s not going to change overnight. He’s got a long road ahead of him. We see glimpses of it, even through Neil, about how much happier Aaron becomes toward the end when he isn’t trying to live up to someone else’s standard of what he should be or under the rules of his brother.

The part of Aaron’s story arc that dealt with freedom from Andrew and finding love with Katelyn is complete at the end of the series. The shift in his worldview on what he perceives to be normal is not. It’s reasonable to think that the climax comes at the trial. That he’ll have another huge growth moment with Andrew. Because of the way the series ends on a positive, you would also expect this to end on the positive. The extra content, if you want to use that, confirms this. He does gain a deeper understanding of Andrew. They keep attending sessions with Bee together. They work through some of their issues. They regularly message each other in the future.

I’d like to give Andrew some credit and think he wouldn’t try to be close with Aaron if Aaron held on to his homophobic thinking. And again the series ends positive, so I would expect the twins to stay in touch in the future even if somewhat strained at times while they work things out.

In Summary

Aaron spends most of the series letting the world dictate what he should want through his desire to be normal until he finally manages to gain his freedom from that thinking and is able to decide for himself what he wants. Once the foundational desire to be normal collapses, he has the potential to overcome the feedback loop driving his homophobia and other behaviors. That’s why I’m optimistic he’s going to change.

[3one3]

The Sequel - 889

Eden Hazard Can Really Hurt You

André Schürrle, Juan Mata, other Chelsea/BVB players, and random awesome OC’s (okay they’re less random now but they’re still pretty awesome)

original epic tale

all chapters of The Sequel

“Do you know why Eden is asking Schü if you’re back with Lex?”

“Does anyone know why Eden does things?”

“Well did you mention her, or see her or something?”

“No.”

“Sure?”

“Yes. You sound like a paranoid and untrusting girlfriend right now. Why?”

“I’m not. It’s just weird. Why would he ask him about it out of the blue?”

“I don’t know. Ask Eden.”

“K”

“Why do you care why he asked if I’m telling you it’s not true?”

“I don’t.”

“Sure.”

“Are you seeing someone else, other than Lex?”

“No. You don’t trust me?”

“Of course I do, but I’ve told you so many times that you can do whatever you want, so...It wouldn’t be like you were doing something wrong.”

“And I’ve told you I don’t want anyone else.”

“Ok. I’m sorry. It was just weird.”

“What’s wrong, pretty girl?” André asked his forlorn looking wife after he let the dogs out. She looked all distant and vaguely upset again on the couch, like earlier in the barn. He lifted up her blanket to get back under it.

“Nothing. Can you just- Can you ask Eden why he was asking you about Juan and Lex?” Christina grimaced. “I know you don’t wanna hear that I’m now obsessing over that, but I have to be honest, and-“

“It’s okay.” He inhaled deeply through his nose, which made a rather loud sound. “We can talk about anything. Always. He didn’t really ask me about him and Lex. He asked me if I recognized some girl Juan talked to at a club last night, and then mentioned that he thought he was back with Lex before.”

“Oh.” Christina’s face fell, and she looked even more forlorn than before. I don’t know who I’m more disappointed in right now. Juan might be hiding something, maybe, and this one could have told me this bit of information that he knows I am definitely interested in.

“Okay, before you get all upset with everyone, consider the source,” the footballer warned encouragingly. He put his arm around her head and kissed her temple with the side of his mouth. “Eden never knows what he’s talking about, and guys talk to girls in nightclubs. It just happens. Especially when you’re the only single guy there. Girls come up to you and they’re all sweet, or seductive, or fawning for you. You can’t get upset because Juan conversed with a woman, and you can’t be mad at me for not telling you that Juan did something you can’t get upset about.”

“But-“

“But it hurts you when someone who says you’re special so much as acknowledges the existence of another woman- got it.” André nodded and squeezed her head tighter. This is a bizarre thing. I’m here consoling her like her gay best friend, because she’s brokenhearted over another guy. How did our lives get like this?

“I just- I need to go make a phone call...”

“Yeah. Of course. Tell him I said hi.”

Christina gave him an apologetic peck on the cheek as soon as she was released from the headlock, and then hurried down the hall to the study as fast as her ouchy ankle would take her. She dialed Juan as soon as her butt hit the window seat cushion.

“Yeees?” the Spaniard sighed over the line, clearly having expected her call.

“Don’t get mad at me. I’m not doubting you. I just need an explanation.”

“I can’t explain another person’s ac-“

“Not for Eden. He asked Schü about the girl you were talking to at whatever club you all went to last night. He just mentioned the Lex thing for context, I guess.”

“And you want to know who the girl is.”

“Yes. And if you took her home with you and if she now knows your tongue is as good as your left foot.” Christina cracked jokes when she was nervous. Christina cracked jokes when she thought humor could get her out of trouble. Christina thought her best friend was rightfully going to be furious with her for asking those questions.

“Her name is Jenni, she did not come home with me, and I have no idea how she feels about my tongue. I can tell you I don’t feel good about you losing your mind because you heard I spoke to a girl.” Juan’s response was measured. It was angry, and impatient for sure, but measured. He didn’t lash out, or sigh, or make disgusted sounds. He also didn’t go on to lecture her about what her reaction said about their relationship. He just left it hanging there. She almost couldn’t help herself. She had to dig her hole deeper.

“Did you want her to go home with you? Do you like her?”

“Chris!”

“I’m sorry,” she groaned. Spencer noticed her in the window and was hopping around on the patio on just the other side of the flowerbed under it, trying to get her attention. It wasn’t working. Her mind was fixed on something else, immovably. “I’m jealous. Okay? I’m jealous. I love you and you’re mine and no matter how many times I say you can go fall in love with someone else I obviously don’t want you to do that ever. I’m sorry. I’m a terrible person. I’m the worst. I’m insanely jealous. I’m also so mad at him for not telling me this, and at the same time I feel terrible for letting him see how jealous I am because somebody else talked to a girl. Ugh. I am the worst.”

“Are you drunk?”

“High, I think. I took one of the prescription pain meds for my ankle.”

“Ahhhhhh. That explains it,” the Chelsea man said with an audible smile on the end of his sigh. Christina didn’t know if he was amused by her inability to tolerate serious drugs or by her serious jealousy.

“It still hurts. And I decided to retire Nicky Tater Tots in March. And Dortmund is awful- the team I mean, not the city. Everything sucks and you shouldn’t talk to girls.”

“He told me he wasn’t going to let you take those things anymore.”

“Pharma Schü only dispenses them in extreme circumstances.”

“He shouldn’t give them to you at all.”

“I’m just being silly because I was, like, panicked.” Well this is embarrassing. I tried to cover up the anxiety attack over him flirting with someone and now he thinks I’m under the influence. Great.

“Okay,” Juan yawned.

“What are you doing?”

“Watching television.”

“I showed Lukas the Marvel dog costumes you sent me and he wants Spencer and Lucky to go to the Halloween party with him as Iron Man and Captain America. I had to pay like a gagillion Euros to have them shipped second-day.”

“What is he going to be?”

“I talked him into being a baby dragon. He likes the little wings. I think he thinks it’s actually a dinosaur costume, but whatever.”

“Did you decide which season Daenerys you want to be?”

“Season 7, badass Daenerys with the pointy shoulders and black outfit. I tried to convince Schü to be Jamie Lannister but he wasn’t having it. He’s with the team for Halloween anyway.”

“Did you end up buying the expensive wig?”

“Yes. I’m going to bring it to Doha with me and we’re gonna role-play,” Christina teased, finally feeling like the tension was gone from the conversation. Her friend’s voice was back to normal, without lingering traces of irritation, and she felt less anxious too. They’d been discussing Halloween costumes for a week because he saw a kid on the street in London in really realistic, correct Scuderia Ferrari overalls just like Sebastian and Kimi’s and then went on an Internet hunt to find the suit and suggest it to Christina for Lukas, to go with his battery powered Ferrari. He couldn’t find the exact suit, but he did stumble across the dog costumes, advertised on some pups that looked just like Spencer and Lucky, so he sent those to her just for fun. She wanted Spencer, Lucky, and Lukas to be her three baby dragons, since she was going to be Daenerys Targaryen, Mother of Dragons. The two-thirds of the family was going to a community party and trick-or-treating thing in Marco’s neighborhood. A bunch of André’s other teammates lived there too.

“I’m never fucking you in a wig.”

“Party pooper.”

“Can I go now?”

“Yes. Sorry about before.”

“Goodnight, cariña. Te quiero.”

“Love you too. Byyyyye.”

Christina returned to the couch. André asked her if everything was as it should be. She said it was. He then asked her to let the dogs back in. She did. Then she announced that she was actually going to bed, and he waffled on what to do in response. His first instinct was to talk to Juan and find out what the deal was. She didn’t actually mention what was said about the Jenni girl, or Juan’s conduct, or how she felt about it. In retrospect, asking her if everything was as it “should be” was a foolish question. Christina could have been literally truthful in her answer and theoretically lying. She might have thought the Spaniard should be able to flirt with other girls, or hook up with them, or even begin a relationship, so if he did any of that then it was appropriate for her to answer “yes” even if she were hugely upset about it and didn’t want him to do any of those things. The player wished he’d just asked her how she felt about whatever was discussed on the phone. He thought of following her to bed and just being extra nice to her in case she was upset, or in case she could be indirectly persuaded to explain the situation. He also thought of just giving her space. Her ankle hurt a lot, she had a busy day, the decision to begin planning Nick’s retirement was an immense weight on her, and she’d been running around trying to keep everyone in the family happy despite things like fish deaths, criminally inept football, unwelcome transfer rumors, a brother’s refusal to commit to a visit, and in-laws who wanted to spend more time with their grandson. In the end, he didn’t really choose. He simply stopped trying to decide, and stayed in the living room.

Christina couldn’t sleep. She wanted to text Juan, not about anything specific, just to chat, but she got a “leave me alone” vibe from him on the phone before. Like her, he needed alone time to do nothing too, and he was historically very turned off by her interrogations and distrust, so she didn’t want to dig her hole any deeper with him. She tried browsing Instagram, playing games on her phone, reading, TV, and even masturbating, which she couldn’t get into. Nothing put her to sleep. The rider gave up and texted her husband downstairs to see if he was coming to bed soon. Rather than write her back, he put the house to sleep and went up to talk face to face.

“Were you waiting for me?” he questioned with his typical look of mild confusion. “Was I supposed to come soon?” Christina shook her head on her pillow. It was all he could see of her, but it was evident from the state of all the other pillows and much of the blanket that she hadn’t been sleeping for the hour or so since she said goodnight.

“I can’t sleep,” his girl frowned.

“Juan?”

“Not really.”

“Nick?”

“Not really.”

“Aidan?”

“Okay you’re making it sound like I’m having relationships with a lot of dudes, boyfriend.”

“One is a horse and one is your brother!” André laughed a little, reassured that he didn’t mess up or miss a cue in not initially following her to bed earlier. He ambled over to her side of the mattress and sat on the edge to give her a kiss once she turned over. “Why can’t you sleep, Prinzessin?” he asked in his Sweet Husband voice.

“I don’t know. I tried everything. I even tried my fingers but my vagina is like a desert right now.” Christina tried out Poor Wife, but was hit with a pang of guilt the second she successfully beamed misery from her eyes. “Are you upset that I cared if Juan talked to a girl? I was really inconsiderate of how you’d feel about that.”

“No. I expect as much. I don’t think I’d be okay with your relationship with him if you didn’t care enough about him to have that reaction. I mean, it’s not pleasant for me, but it’s not a big deal. Don’t let that keep you up,” the player stressed with brows pinched for emphasis. His hand rubbing her hip over the comforter felt honest. It wasn’t an empty gesture. I’m grateful that we’re back to where I can tell he’s being real with me just from the weight of his palm, she reflected. We used to talk at each other and step on each other and just keep getting it so fucking wrong. It was like we spoke different languages and knew nothing of each other’s body language either. “Is it that situation that’s keeping you up? You can say,” André added encouragingly. He wasn’t so sure of his ability to hear and read her. “I don’t want him to do things that hurt or upset you either, believe it or not.”

“I believe it, actually.” A little grin made her face look a lot less unhappy and plagued to him. “Are you ready for sleepy time or are you just visiting?”

“Depends. Are you inviting me into the bed to hydrate your desert vagina or-“

“No I just think I have a better chance of falling asleep on you than by myself.”

“Can I brush my teeth and everything or is this an emergency?”

“You may,” Christina nodded. He’s so sweet. Sometimes he gives me those awkward I-wish-he-could-be-my-dad feels I don’t know how to address. Sometimes he takes care of me and he has the loving, dad-like quality in his voice, and in his face too, even. I guess what you do when a guy gives you dad feels is have a kid with him so that you can see him behave like a dad but you can still sleep with him and stuff. Ugh maybe Juanin is right. I shouldn’t take those painkillers. She reached down to rectify a wedgie situation and then waited for her preferred pillow to use the bathroom, brush his teeth, put his shorts and socks away, plug in his phone, fill his water glass, and fluff his regular pillows, which she’d repurposed for herself during her struggles to get to dreamland. He got under the covers and immediately reached over to hug and squeeze her before he was going to get comfortable and prepared to host her in a snuggling capacity.

“You want talking, or just rubbing and petting? Or spoon?”

“Your legs are so hairy,” the filling in his arm and leg taco observed. The outside of his thigh was the only place for her right hand when she found herself squished in the middle of all of his limbs.

“Are they ever not? That part, at least.”

“In the summer when I make you wax.”

“What do you want to have dreams about tonight, pretty girl?” he inquired with his mouth and nose in her freshly shampooed mane. It smelled like lemon. His desire to help her get to sleep, and indeed to have nice dreams when she arrived there, was grounded in a certain relief and satisfaction in the transparency in what unfolded throughout the night. He knew he had to have felt a certain amount of security to be able to say anything at all to her about Juan and Alexis, and then to explain the full context. Not so long in the past, he would have avoided it at all costs, because he would have felt threatened by her reaction. Then Christina was comfortable enough to admit that she needed to go clear up the gaps in the story with Juan rather than keep her anxiety to herself, hidden from her husband for safety’s sake. And she was still forthcoming with the communication after the call, and she was sympathetic to how he could feel about it. The whole episode demonstrated, in André’s view, a comprehensive improvement in the levels of trust and understanding in their marriage.

The fundamentals of the situation were still tough to take- his wife was still in love with another man too, and enough so that she was very upset by literally the rumor of his sharing a conversation with another woman- but that was easier to digest when she wasn’t also lying about it, trying to hide it, pretending, or deflecting, or letting it destroy everything for her and for them. There was a lot less drama surrounding the core issue. André couldn’t do anything about the core issue. He couldn’t make his wife un-love his former teammate. His choice on that was to accept it or walk away. He always felt he could do something about all the nonsense that ruined everything in their relationship though, and it finally felt as if he’d accomplished that, or they’d accomplished it together. Christina’s relationship with Juan was no longer rat poison for her relationship with him. He was finally just getting the benefits of letting her have the arrangement with the Spaniard that she wanted. He got a happier, less stressed, more emotionally fit girl to enjoy sharing his life with, and though he was sure she could be that way without Juan, he was also sure she didn’t believe that, and that it was foolish to keep trying to make her believe it. It felt very, very good to let go of that need to make her believe, and to duly reap the rewards.

“Exotic macaroni and cheese.”

“Exotic?”

“Like smoked Gouda, or a blend of many cheeses...”

“You want to dream about cheese?” the player asked skeptically as he released his strange wife to find a position that offered more long-term comfort.

“Or bread. Bread and cheese. Baguettes and Camembert. With wine, or coffee, even, in a Paris cafe. The kind the locals go to, not tourists. My makeup should be really pretty and effortless- very French- and you should have your sleeves rolled up, and a lovely scarf. And we kiss between every bite of divine bread and cheese, or bread and delicious French butter, and you flirt with your eyes the whole time, and it makes me blush and laugh a lot.” Christina was safely tucked under her favorite gangly arm by the time she was done setting the scene for her dream, and her cheek was resting comfortably on her footballer’s chest. He started thinking about kidnapping her for an overnight in Paris to celebrate his birthday. It was on Monday, and his girl was leaving for Doha on Tuesday. Bayern Munich was due at Signal Iduna Park on Saturday in the early evening. They could use the charter jet to fly after the match and still get to Paris in time for late dessert, spend the night, enjoy the day there together, and come back Sunday evening.