#no hate but ur country actually scares me

[lavenderhazess]

In vet school learning about animal production and y’all what the hell are you doing in the USA 😅 they teach us (Australians) things like DONT do this this is very bad and then the next slide is ‘the Americans do it tho’

Also you call adrenaline ‘epinephrine’ why

[ofallthingsnasty]

henlooo!! i read ur post abt manipulator kaiser and oliver. (i’m already 20 btw) what would be their reaction if their foreign!s/o tries to escape from them and go home to their country? would they hunt them down or would they just let them go?

hello hello haha 🤗 tbh I've only thought about Kaiser with a foreign darling so far because that really tickles me - but Oliver as well? Interesting thought 👀

word count: 1k goes with this thirst post here

tags: yandere, emotional manipulation

I think neither one is the 'hunting down' type (Shidou or even Barou, however...) - but Kaiser, in my opinion, will not hesitate to utilize his fame. Soccer is really popular here in Germany and I know a fair share of players and their partners even though I am absolutely not invested in the Bundesliga and the likes. You leaving and in such an abrupt way? Basically overnight? That's going to be all over the yellow press, no doubt. He is one of Germany's best players and he won't have to lift a finger to get all eyes on your 'break-up' (Of course they don't know that you basically fled, don’t know what he’s really like behind the scenes-). The media circus will be a lot for you. You'll definitely have to go private or even delete all your socials because of the sheer amount of hate you will get (if he let you run your own, of course. He might just be the type to insist on him curating those for you, never mind the fact that you could be located through those). Your face is all you see the moment you open any European news site, aside from the more serious ones. The media will most likely smear you - and maybe even turn on you fully once Kaiser drops a few calculated words. Everyone will speculate why you left like you did, will try to analyze yours and Kaiser’s relationship until they’ve found a plausible reason. You’re better off ditching the internet or the media all together for a little while. As for Kaiser, would he ask you for forgiveness, knock on your door one night or just straight up snatch you up? Oh, no. He's too proud for that, even though he is positively seething. He's angry, first and foremost, angry that you could be so ungrateful, that you would just leave him, a goddamn superstar. You were supposed to worship him like the rest of them, not run for the hills the moment he got a little too comfortable. But I can actually see Ness sniffing your location out and paying you a tearful visit, harping on your feelings, telling you how much of a mess Kaiser is without you, how he can be so difficult but, really, he only acted the way he did because he loves you- He’ll put on his sweetest face, the biggest teary eyes. When you don't fall for it, he will turn downright nasty and berate you for it, threaten you. Don't you know what level of influence Kaiser has, how much money he has to waste? You think some measly borders will stop that? He can turn your life into hell even from a continent away, you'll see. Ness will play the errand boy for Kaiser happily - and he'll mean every word he'll say. Disloyalty towards Kaiser is just something he won’t stand. I think he'd leave you to mull over it - waiting to see if you can be scared into crawling back. But if you still don’t come back, Kaiser will make Ness’ threats come true until you do, paranoid and destitute. He can absolutely pull some strings - and he will.

Oliver doesn't have the same tools available to him - not that he isn't famous, just not as much as Kaiser - your break-up will probably be picked up by some tabloids and fans online but it won't make the waves it does with Kaiser. But forcing you back with his influence is not his style, anyways. No, Oliver will make you take him back. Willingly. I think he'd grin and bear the ‘break-up’, on the outside. He won't lose his cool over this, even though it's bothering him a lot. He'll throw himself into his work, his team, keeps that laissez-fair attitude as if his life depends on it. I don't see him as the type to come up with an intricate plan to get you back but he'll let you cool off a little and bets on your poor, little brain smoothing things over for him in retrospect. He won't pick up anyone during this time to get back at you or to make you jealous - he'll be on his best behavior, won't be mentioning the 'break-up' anywhere, won't utter a word of contempt into your direction, won't even go out to party that much. For his standards, he's turning into somewhat of a golden boy - but it really is just a ploy. To make you see how much you've changed him. To make you see how heart-broken he is. Due to his charade, you’ll probably think yourself safe - until he turns up at your door one day, with the biggest apologetic smile on his face. It’s so jarring, it actually stuns you into silence. He’ll show you just how much of a talker he can be - for hours and hours he’ll lay it on thick, won’t spare a single, oh-so-sad detail. And it’s so easy to let yourself fall for his charms again - it wasn’t all that bad, right? You’ve loved him, still kind of do - the old wounds have scarred over, the pain long gone. And with the way he eyes you, still tired from his travels, like some kicked puppy, his attention solely focused on you... You can feel a familiar tug at your heart again and before you know it, you find yourself doubting your past self. Maybe you just overreacted at times? Maybe you could have poured yourself more into the relationship, could have given him more - shown him just how much you loved him. It’s an ugly feeling of doubt, of uncertainty, of longing. Before you know it, you’ll see the relationship through a different lense and him in a much softer light - how lucky you are, then, that he is here to stay for a little while, just until you can sort your feelings out. And this time, he’s serious - and willing to show you with a shiny ring on your finger.

[hellonerf]

suicide is discouraged in the workplace

im not even gonna try to be coherent here. this is not an analysis post i am braindead. if i was a better artist makima wouldve been my muse when i was deep into chainsawman. actuallt she kind of was but i pussyed out

OK everyone here can subconsciously understand this connection. dont get too hung up on makima's strong motherhood theme and i just thought about what if ame was motherly and i couldn't kill myself right aftee thinking that as i have no means to it. that was a joke its late and im just me. i decided i wasnt a fan of motherly ame though so all suicidal thoughts erased. i am really chill now

old makima fanart i drew that im trying not to rip my hairs out over thinking about it with ame. also dont worry if this makes tou find my mainblog or main accounts whatever

actually theyre really different in many ways now that im looking at these. ame is so much of a son and makima is so much of a mother its like oppsoite spectrums. but thay makes the commonalities fun actuallt. i keep thinking about the movies and makima hating bad movies. ame is not an art kid by any means does he even care of the beauty of the world? i doubt it. but he likes bad movies and he likes cheap entertainment so who knows... they'd disagree on that. well i think makima's opinion on that was pretty extreme so i think most would disagree with her really

i could imagine ame going "Chainsawman. Doesn't spit." and smoking for the first time to look cool like in movies only to pathetically cough. thats their common trait... artifice... humans... but in a way that loops back to being Really Human i guess. holds a kind of arrogance and hubris that is so associated with humanity. it cant be anything else. ame should kill himself i think he should get moments of clarity and awareness and want to kill himself rqlly bad

both concepts of control. awesome. SUICIDE IS NOT ENDORSED IN THE WRKPLACE. ame goes to protestant church once or twice and sleeps because hes useless. makima is baptised and goes to local catholic churches not the cathedrals she supports the local christians.FUCK i just remembered the country mouse city mouse thing. ame is a liar and hates everything and loves everything and never feels content. i like to imagine him as a country mouse so fucking bad i want him to chill out one day and go to those middle of nowheres i know exist in america(can i shove cana in here and get away with it). why are they in the city if they are country mice? because..... you know..... you understand..... another w for eternal unhappiness (refer to title of this post)(suicide is discouraged in the workplace)

they are evil bosses i am the employee and when i ask for a break they gaze at me with a vacant stare and smile and i know in my heart they are viewing me like i am beneath them. i get scared and run away but truth is they didnt hear my request. they do not register individual people

if they met they would know immediately and viceversa. because everyone knows subconsciously because lying is futile and everything melts away. ame:i know a toxic boymom when i see one... okay im kidding makima is a toxic boymom if u push the chainsawman in ur head 🙂 ame as a kind of control devil works inmy head. i really believe ame was a polite child but demanding in many ways. sincerely wanting.

ame:gun devil i'll give you one year of the lifespans of the american people. in exchange i want you to kill makima—that is... the control devil (i never got around to drawing this)(ame and gun devil can you imagine)

or:gun devil i'll give you one year of the lifespans of the american people. in exchange i want you to kill alfred f jones—that is... the united states of america (paradox)

throughout all this i wanted to cite the best makima artist in the world ever but i'd feel bad if they wouldn't want to be associated with evil hetalia america blog. also i want to be normal and not cringe at being cringe just becayse i think makima was a thunderstrike of genius that i shouldn't taint. ame is a more flexible character to me for obvious reasons. this is how i'd shove ame into makima's role. but u couldn't put makima as ame. only one way. im okay with that. concept idea consensus words fear control blablabla u get the point i hate using words dont care sleepy now

[luvrrgirl444]

chapter 13: reading ur confessions

a month later

“hi, my stars!” you said to the camera. you were sitting in your pink and black gaming chair, with your ipad in hand.

“big momma is back again, and today i’m gonna be reading your-” you pointed to the camera. “-confessions.”

“i made a google form and told you guys to send your crazy confessions. so, let’s read some confessions.”

you opened the google form on your ipad. “kinda excited to see the shit y’all sent me.” you said with a smile. you went to the responses and scrolled to a random one.

“alright, first one.”

“when i was 14 i met a guy on imvu, i’ll call him bob.” you paused. “first mistake. girl, why were you playing imvu at 14? speaking from experience, that app is a crazy place to be on. anyways, on with the story.”

“bob told me that he was 15 and that he lived in the same state as me. we talked for a while and then he suggested that we met up. me, being young and dumb said yes and we decided to meet up at a nearby mall.”

“you met up with a guy you met on imvu.” you said, looking at the camera with an ‘are you serious?’ look. “let’s think about that for a second.” the jeopardy music started to play.

the music played for a couple seconds before it stopped. “at least you were smart enough not to go to his house or something. a round of applause for you.” you started clapping, and soon sound effects of cheers and claps joined you.

“alright. alright.”

“when i went to the meeting spot, i met with ‘bob’. but apparently bob actually lived in another country and used his younger friend’s pictures to catfish me. me and the guy both decided to report and block bob and we later started dating. im 17 now and me and the guy are still dating.”

“i was not expecting that ending at all. glad you guys are still going strong and i hope that weird ass bitch bob goes behind bars because that man deserves JAIL.” you looked at the camera while police sirens played. you took a deep breath before saying,

“anyways, onto the next.”

“when i was 6 years old i really hated my neighbor. one day at school she beat me in a race and i was so angry i pissed in a cup and gave it to her to drink.”

“girl.” you said, staring at the camera once again.

“you gave that poor girl pee to drink because she beat you in a race? now, thats some next level hating.”

“she told me it tasted funny but proceeded to drink all of it. she didn’t come to school for the next two weeks. i asked my mom what happened to her and she told me that the girl got an infection and was so serious that she had to go to the hospital. 11 years later and nobody knows it was me. i still hate that bitch.”

“i have so many questions. did she die? are you guys still neighbors? what the fuck?”

you read a few more confessions. some asking you for advice, others admitting crazy shit that they’ve done.

“so i’m gonna end the video here. definitely a little bit scared of you guys, but i had fun reading your confessions! thank you for watching and i love you to the moon and back!” you finished, blowing a kiss to the camera.

🫧

- finally wrote another yt video

taglist !! : @greeniegreengreen @hahaimnotdeadyet @bakuhoes-bxtch @itzgabz22 @princess-jaeger @marsandsaturn @violenthots @urlovemaze @conniesbbymama @llovergirlll @iheartamajiki @444yeager @liliorsstuff-blog @hoohoohope @akvrae @rinslutz @kokxm1

[iamthat-iam]

Taylor switft is such a bad artist 😭😭😂 Lover is her only good track

She copies the essence of actual good musicians

And her album covers copies and waters down certain aesthetics

Like there are so many artists that are more deserving of the awards shes gotten

I just really dislike her, shes no artist, she just likes the fame and is a symbol for keeping society regressed. Her music singlehandedly guided millions of women and gays down some schizo path of no returns...like yall swifties need to realize that music keeps u stuck in a loop of GRAMMY wins for taylor

UGHHHH, i hate her fans too cause like why???! SWIFTIES???? Why give up so much of urself for a demon artist like taylor. It's embarrassing.

Also half of her lyrics are so unrealistic. Like girl, no boy cares about you that much, especially with all the drama ur so partial to, like yes, you are the problem!!!!! Get over urself, taylor

Idk, i have an illogical hatred towards her. She rly grinds my gears...

Lmao you went off anon 🤣🤣😭

I do agree with what you said here. She's not versatile at all, her music is mainly for caucasian teenaged girls. I never could get into her music, even when she was just a country artist.

I feel like she should have stuck with that.. I'm not a fan of her overly-pop sound and many of her lyrics are cringe to me. Like look what you made me do... we supposed to be scared of you now?? 🤦🏾‍♀️😭🤣

And yes, the fans are also insufferable sometimes. One of them had a nerve to compare her to Michael Jackson 😭😭

[pebiejeebies]

ISNT IT FUNNY? - Poll below.. read warnings please.

TW: Curse words, Full caps, Vent/Rant (I got very angry here.. sorry)

(If you are sensitive to the topic of LGBT, Alterhumanity, Vents/Rants, please do not read.)

Before you read, understand that most of what I say is an example, nothing more, nothing less. And I support and love Alterhumanity and LGBTQ+ equally, no more, no less. And If I worded something wrong, do tell!

Im glad to hear you two aren’t actually mad at me.. (Talking specifically to @chocolatespyro and @thelittleprinceconfirmed , but this is for everyone, don’t leave yet!)

I kinda feel like a little child or something— you know, for telling me I’m not wrong.. hah.. but eitherway thank you both for explaining what’s right and wrong, I “sorta” thought I did like a HUUGGGEE horrible thing so like I took a moment alone for a bit, then I came back to your very calm words.

I’m never used to people talking to me so.. nicely, (especially in a sensitive topic like this) that’s why I might fuck up and say I messed up even though I had the complete right to speak. (Which shows in my “apology” post, I literally deleted everything cause I thought it was a stupid idea to talk about)

Sigh, I guess since it’s fine from the both of you, I guess I can talk about it again. Honestly thank you for comforting me and such. I expected WAAAAAAYYYY worse.. (haha trauma go brrr) but yeah, back onto the topic.

(THIS IS THE START OF THE TOPIC IF UR UNINTERESTED IN WHAT I SAY FOR THEM <;3)

The topic (if you didn’t know) was basically about how people reacted towards LGBTQ+ and Alterhuman coming out situations..

(I think if you go to my profile and use #my polls you might find a broken and messy reblog of it, cause I deleted the text/poll aha..)

Let’s do an example, shall we? (NO HATE TOWARDS LGBT. JUST AN EXAMPLE)

We all love it when we hear the appreciation posts say: “Be who you are! Never hide your true colors! Show yourself to the world! Never be scared to shine!” And so on.. but why do I feel like it’s mostly aimed for humans (aka LGBT), not Alterhumans.. (IK THERE ARE APPRECIATION POSTS FOR THEM/GEN)

If an Enby came out to their parents, (like in America or a country that supports lgbt) there’s a good chance they’d be supported by their parents, or friends, or both! (WHICH IS VERY GOOD, DONT TAKE IT THE WRONG WAY!)

But alterhumanity has an issue with that, (Still in America or a country similar to it) if I ever said to my parents that I was a therian and a fictkin, they’d either laugh thinking I’m joking or smth, or they’d think I’m out of my religion for being an Alterhuman (WHICH IS COMPLETELY UNREALISTIC! SEARCH IT UP!) I researched so much for a good week or two, learning about therianthropy and fictkinity, and it doesn’t even affect your religion! Satanist? You can be a Alterhuman! Christian? You can still be Alterhuman! Etc etc..

It is an Identity, you identify as an Alterhuman, just like how you would identify as a part of the LGBT!

(Keep in mind that I know what LGBTQ+ people go through, and I’m so proud of them for fighting back all this horrible hate)

Back to the main issue, which was the “Coming out” issue. like I said earlier, if you came out as an enby you’d most likely get good treatment, like flags around pride month, and freedom of expression! (And Like hearing people use your pronouns, which probably feels so great <3)

Now let’s look at alterhumanity.. If I wore a tail or ears out in the public.. will I get the feeling of “Be who you are! Never hide your true self!” In those painful stares of disgust and shame? If I ever hissed “accidentally” in public, wouldn’t they just make fun of me? (Which.. sadly happened once.. never again.) and so on..

What’s my point you say?

LET. EVERY. CREATURE. EXPRESS. THEMSELVES.

Where is the equality everyone talks about?! Have you seen how much HATE VIDEOS of THERIANS, OTHERKINS, AND SUCH?! It’s RIDICULOUS.

It only infuriates me because you (not targeted dw) say “Be who you are! Never hide! Show yourself to the world” then go all “What the fuck are you wearing.. are you a cat boy?! Cringe asf..” or “You do know ur human right?” OR ONE OF THE MOST INFURIATING THINGS TO SAY TO US “You wanna get treated like wild animals? I’ll get my shotgun and hunt you down lolol”

Aaahhaha funny indeed! (I might be overthinking again, sorry)

You don’t see enbys (NOT TARGETED. ITS AN EXAMPLE) Get called “You know you’re human right?” Yet every day (not literally) I see a new post on therianthropy hate, mocking of them walking on all 4s or showing their beautiful howls/roars/meows/squaks.. etc etc.. (This sort of happens to furries as well, they are so misunderstood. </3)

It’s frustrating when I show myself to this world after they ASSURE me and TELL ME ITS FINE.

then all I get is a

mocking

stare

of

DISGUST.

even after they say “I’ll never judge you”

(Take a moment to breathe, and think about this so far, I don’t want you to get tired because of me, <3)

Sigh. I guess this accidentally turned into a vent/rant (since I was more comfortable talking about it.. makes sense I guess)

Now, the thing you (probably) came here for.. The Poll.

(Be a little more detailed in your opinion please and explain if ur talking to me or not/gen, and please reblog/nf so more people can vote/nfnfnf)

Thank you for voting/reading (I like looking at statistics, that’s why I made a poll btw.)

Here, have a cookie for being so patient!

🍪

[iminthetunnels]

i’m SOOO conflicted that i have to blog abt it. i don’t often write about my personal struggles anymore bc someone on here has a parasocial relationship with me and sends very mean/ugly anons for some reason. regardless. i am conflicted about homeschooling. i love the idea and my son does really well with me already. we do tracing, writing, physical play, counting, reading, color sorting. but. i do miss my career and i hate saying this. i really do. i hate the country i am that doesn’t allow me to work my career while having a small child. do i sacrifice my career and my self even longer?? or do i succumb and allow my child into public school. which both are beneficial. altho my son is disabled. he is technically blind, something glasses cannot correct. he also has epilepsy. which… the private schools will not accept him for having epilepsy… LOL ERM. anyways.

homeschooling is incredible, if done right. i can see that already. my son works incredibly well in a small, low light, non stressful situation. if done properly, homeschooling children are better at being social and better at college and so forth. now, the entire problem with homeschooling is something very personal to me. without relaying this persons personal information, i’ve seen how abusive parents can ruin a child’s life with homeschooling. that is not the norm for homeschooling. and of course, when the child is older, they will communicate whether or not homeschooling is for them or not for them. my child is already enrolled in extra circular activities and isn’t very social (by choice.) he has to have very slow, non reactive friends around him. because of his vision, he tends to get really scared at the normal child play (screaming while having fun, testing limits) my son is very pensive, very shy, very ABLE, keeping in mind he’s just analyzing everything. he’s very smart. i am just trying to take care of myself as well. u know. in a perfect world, i wouldn’t even consider this. i’d homeschool all the way if i could. i’ll continue to pray and work hard on myself, while also figuring out things for my son. we have about 2 more years anyways before actually deciding. right now, i rly am homeschooling bc that’s what ur suppose to do…!

[why-the-heck-not]

hi ! i’m new to your blog and I really love your daily updates. how is computer science as a major? i am thinking about applying but im really scared about it being too fast and being dumb compared to everyone else (like how i felt in high school) plus im horrible at math but i want to potentially learn more about computers.

like i enrolled for that free harvard intro to CS50 class online but it was way too difficult for me to understand and I was 2minutes in and they were only talking about binary stuff ugh

Heyy!! Personally for me it’s been very varied in the difficulty levels. Like it’s never too easy, haven’t had a course where I’d just breeze through it with no problems, there’s always something (but that’s part of the fun in coding; being frustrated out of ur mind but when you crack it? That feeling is my favorite one out there). It’s yea has some mathematical thinking, but not outright maths that much (aside from AI that’s just lots of probability math & statistics). But I feel like it’s very different mathematical thinking from ”regular” math.

Also starting a whole new different subject is obviously at first going to be very confusing & difficult bc u have no existing concepts to place the things you’re learning on, the context keeps building up when u keep studying & usually things get clearer as you learn more.

Abt the binary stuff; you don’t rly need it for coding (like it’s good stuff to know obv to have like the basic concept of where everything is based on) unless you code in some assembly language. (Altho u could have some obligatory assembly language courses (we had one and everyone hated it lmao and it’s just one of those courses you’re looking forward to passing and never thinking abt again (at least was for me; some ppl love it)).

Universities are also more flexible if u feel like it’s too fast; there’s no set schedule you have to follow. You can take longer to graduate if u need to and it’s not the end of the world. And a lot of ppl actually do graduate like 0.5-1 year later (or more but I feel like that’s the common one; there’s the outlier spiders georgs of forever students who’ve been there for 8 years). Like I’m graduating in 4 years (hopefully 🤞) instead of the 3 that was the goal time. (<- all of that tho could be different in ur country’s education system, that’s just how it is here, like u can always apply for more time and it’s pretty easy to get)

Tho in the end, it’s hard for me to say. I don’t like the idea of ”being too dumb” for something; just might take some ppl more time/effort for some things than other ppl.

[solar-halos]

do u ever think about the way olivia rodrigo invented music

just kidding i know the emotions she sings about have existed since the beginning of time but im just now realizing that if i was born in the taylor swift era i would 100% be a swiftie bc i was thinking abt olivia rodrigo’s music the other day and unironically had the thought “wow she literally invented having emotions” before i managed to catch myself. but honestly i think it’s crazy how accurately she captures all these feelings of insecurity and heartbreak (and now joy!) so perfectly!!

“lacy” and “pretty isn’t pretty” seem so similar on the surface, but i feel like lacy is more of a gradual realization that no matter what u do—or how ur actually perceived—you will never feel as feminine as u want to. there will always be people (aka Lacy) who are gonna be effortlessly elegant and beautiful and feminine and feeling jealous of that is so fuckin stupid but that doesn’t stop u from caring. and then i like “pretty isn’t pretty” bc i feel like that’s the aftermath of Lacy. idk the part abt her trying every shade of lipstick really hit bc when i was first experimenting w makeup i remember feeling so insecure that none of them seemed “my” color. also i really like the gradual buildup of “it’s in my phone/head/magazines/the boys i bring to bed” bc i feel like that describes the pipeline so well

anyway now let’s get into the new songs she released. i’m actually not sure if they’re new bc when i searched it up after it popped up on my spotify google said she released this back in 2023? so idk. but her youtube channel literally has this all released within the last few days. but my favorite thing about these songs is how im in the same era she’s in rn. that happened to me with “sour” and “guts” reopened a lot of those old wounds, so i absolutely love the healing theme (? i know that’s not the right word but it’s hard to think rn) this album has. let’s start off with obsessed since that popped up for me first

obsessed? yeah, obsessed with this fucking song. seriously. “if you knew how much i thought about her you’d think i was in love” already starting off on a banger. also i watched the mv and i loved it. this song literally couldn’t have came at a more perfect time, yall ever just randomly remember that ur s/o has dated ppl that aren’t u before? chilling realization, really

scared of my guitar? “i can’t lie to it the same way i like to you”? “i lay in your arms and pretend that it’s love”? “i’d rather be tied to someone even if they’re wrong”? oh my god. i was literally thinking about this the other day. like, being in a relationship bc u want to be or if it’s bc you’re scared of being by yourself. and i also like the fact that it’s insinuating that the other person is the better half. bc sometimes it does feel like literally just loving someone when you struggle so much with the thoughts i mentioned is just the same as stringing them along. but then also i think it’s nice to pretend you’re in love bc obviously at the beginning of a relationship you have no idea if it’s ever going to go that far, so i think we often fall in love with the idea of being loved. which sounds a bit corny when i put it like that, but scared of my guitar made *me* feel like a tortured poet bc i used to be like “im chill ! :o)” and then open up ao3 and write a billy taupe/lucy gray story like girl…. that’s not the same as olivia rodrigo being folksy and cute

speaking of being folksy and cute, “girl i’ve always been” is so folksy and cute! i literally hate country music so fucking much (i’m sorry… one time this guy in hs played God’s Country in front of the class for a presentation and he stood there kinda ominously so ever since then i’ve kinda hated it) but this song was nice i liked it! i like the confidence it exudes, someone already mentioned this in the comments but it really is giving off lucy gray vibes, especially “with venom on my tongue u ask me who i’ve become” like okayyy someone needs to write a billy taupe/ lucy gray inspired story abt that line immediately. i don’t really have much more to say since this one was the one i found the least personally relatable, but i love the sassiness of it all!!

stranger. this one was a FUCKING banger, this was the sort of era i was in when guts released so im so glad miss olivia rodrigo could put the feeling of realizing u don’t *need* someone u thought u literally couldn’t live without into words. “i always thought it was some comforting lie ppl told” literally. also the call back to “enough for you” by saying “if im not enough for you then you’re not enough for me either” :,). i think growing up is quite nice

so american. fav! <3 <3 <3. “he’s like a poem i wish i wrote” hands down my favorite lyric fucking ever. i LOVE this song. like i said with “lacy” and “pretty isn’t pretty” bleeding into each other, i think the same applies w this song and “scared of my guitar.” like after u get over ur fear of ur guitar u realize that ur so american and suddenly wanting to get married and be in love doesn’t seem so selfish anymore. i really, really love this song (if i haven’t already mentioned that)

sorry, i know this was a long post! stranger had me bursting into tears so i told Boyfriend i needed to write in my “notes app” abt it so everyone say hi Boyfriend. but seriously im feeling so american rn i literally was like “leave me alone and don’t touch me im feeling explosively emotional” and he was like ok! here’s some fruit. and then now im writing on my phone about songs i love. like is there any better feeling??

[taylors-fourth-cat-meow]

Its nice to see someone else immune to Mors BS, now if you dont like Amren after ACOSF there *chefs kiss*. Anyway, the reason I never cared for her is because she felt fake to me, like a girl in highschool that smiles in your face or makes comments like "ugh im so (insert flaw here) " just to get the people around her to say "no your the BEST! We all wish we were you!" for her to just smile. IDK I just was never really on the hype train with her even from MAF (bc of what she did with Cass & Az)

Hi anon!

Yeh mor does seem super fake and idk 2D??? It's like she only shows up when the plot needs it otherwise she isn't relevant to the plot. Actually she isn't needed at all?

It's just that idk maybe Sjm water Feyre to have a girl bestie? Which seems unnecessary cause Cassian cud have been her bestf too? Idk why she thought that this femmine support was necessary (tbh her character wud have been much more interesting if she was the catty sister in law cause DRAMA)

And yes she's the girl who came between two brothers GOD I hate that trope that's so fcking disgusting??? AND THIS HAS BEEN GOING OM FOT 500 YEARS?????????

DISGUSTING.

Plus the thing where she's bi but not bi? Like idk if Sjm even understands the meaning of it when she made Mor a lgbtq character. What even is her orientation? She like men and women sexually but romantically she's only interested in women (i don't remember the books well so forgive me for any mistakes)and idk doesn't like men as much and/or only likes them cause that's how it's supposed to be and sleeps with them to remind azriel she's not interested

And the way she has been stringing along Azriel for centuries??? Why? What's even th point?, If he's ur so called family why not set him free? Why hurt the one u claim to love?

Then there's her powers? she's claimed to be this legend who fought the war and idk evryone's scared by her name? BUT WHATS HER POWER? is she a lie detector like what? 'TrUtH iS mY pOweR' Idk how far that can get u as a warrior.

Also I am immensely irritated by the fact that she's blonde. I'm srry but if the illyarians are are brown? (Like so many claim the bat boys are ) how tf can she be blonde and white? ISNT SHE RHYSANDS COUSIN? I'm srry I fail to understand how people living in the same geographic region in the same country have different ethnicities and DIFFERENT RACES??? Like wtf? Illyarians and brown but everyone else in the nc is white I'm srry I just- it annoys me to no end. Okay yeh Nc is diverse I get it, so is my country, BUT THAT DOESN'T MEAN SEPARATE RACES? (I'm srry this deviated a bit.)

Basically, to sum it all up, I don't like Mor.

[detectivebambam]

*sigh* here we go again

Im bored, and yet again, I have found myself in ur asks box

Sooo, more questions🥳🥳

🔐 something no one would guess about you

🧟‍♀️ scariest thing that’s happened to you

🔥 craziest thing that’s ever happened to you

🍓 favorite food

🍅 least favorite food

🍊 favorite season?

🍋 favorite genre to read / watch / write

🍐 if you could make one character real, who would it be

🫐 some place you’d love to visit

Alsoooo which of the foxes do u think like pineapple on pizza and which ones hate it? Do u think they regularly have arguments about it in the foxes gc (assuming they have one) or constantly bring it up in completely unrelated arguments??

And Nora said Andrew is the older twin which makes sense since he has the whole big brother energy, but what if Aaron was the older twin??? Like the potential???

i hope you know i love you more than anything

well if you knew me irl and not from tumblr, nobody seems to think I'm queer? I'm very country yk, the whole farmer, horseback riding, rodeo, etc. since you know me on tumblr, switch it lol

i walked down to "the murder house" (every small town has a murder house) with my friends and my hunting dog. obvs he's a hunting dog so he's not scared of animals or anything, but he was sniffing around this pile of junk and ran out with his tail between his legs? so we left but right on the fence line there was a pile of dirty kids clothes, tissues, and rubber gloves. spooky

craziest thing???? i actually have no idea 😐 maybe getting shot with a bb gun when i was like 2 yrs old

any carbohydrates, or sushi 🤭

pork 😔 i raise meat pigs, but pork is just gross to me. chops, bacon, anything. idk

summer!!!! i love being warm

read and watch? historical fiction or retelling. write?: idk probably porn

i want to say Andrew Minyard, but the amount of trauma he has I don't want another real person to go through that. so maybe Alex C-Diaz ? I'd make that whole book real if i could lol

i would love to go to Peru i think it's so beautiful

I'm gonna start with the second one here: if you look at my twinyard tags, you would know that i 100% hc Aaron as the older twin, and i love writing angst about it

Pineapple on Pizza

Absolutely Not:

Alison. she's gotta be one of those pretentious bitches that went to Italy for a week with her family and thinks she knows everything

Andrew: he probably only eats breadsticks anyway with all of his food avoidance stuff. so i would say no?

Aaron: morally against it, but would probably enjoy it if he tried it

Kevin: i don't think Kevin likes pizza at all, but if he does, he wouldn't want fruit on it

Dan: also morally against it, but wouldn't like it if she tried it

Yes:

Neil. no evidence for this, just vibes

Matt. i think Hawaiian pizza is his favorite 😒

Nicky: he lives for weird food combos i feel

Renee: she genuinely loves the way it tastes

they absolutely argue over it, and it's fun for all of them to watch the twins team up on something

and they absolutely have a group chat (with just the og 9)

[hyperdemona]

I actually started carrying pepperspray not because of men, but because a dog bit me and I want to be safe if I were to get attacked again.

Getting bit by this dog (puncture wounds bleeding down my leg, assumed he was running after me to ne friendly till he got close, I was young and oh my bike. Like he literally bolted down an street while I was biking, bit my ankle hard. Flat out aggressive targeted behavior I was biking around a park and he came out of nowhere .) It taught me to start yelling “hey! HEY! NO! Back up!” Dogs can sense anger, dogs can sense territorial animal behavior which is exactly what I’m doing, defending myself territory Aka body. I had this dumb territory try and go after my ankle while biking, I kept yelling “hey, hey, hey, hey,” everyrime I saw him going for my ankle… he stopped and barked all mad and fucked off. Scared the shit out of me when I saw a stuffy loose, held just pepper spray and told him to back up (insecure nervous dog bit thar is also a type that might bite if feeling threatened, he backed off.)

It’s kinda like men; get angry and scream like a bitch and they freak out from that energy.

(Ofc this won’t always work and I don’t blame kids just dumping in your inbox that I get your hate for dogs… I’m grown, not a child, child can’t defend themselves. I was still a girl when I

got bit and I love dogs I’m like wtf 😭😭 I don’t hate dogs, But don’t love them so ouch anymore and don’t blame you for hating dogs…

I don’t get the cat hate from folks, truly; when has a stray cat or a cat that gets out go around attacking folks? I’d trust a cat around a kid before I trusted a dog.

Wondering if so often they say “men are like dogs, women are like cats” cause cats have good boundaries and are “selfish” while dogs are dumb and bark at anything that moves?

I genuinely dislike dogs. Puppies are cute but it's HARD to like dogs these days if ur in Keralam these days. It's sooo bad here. Spaying and neutering have completely failed. It works in western countries because stray populations are low in the first place because of harsh weather, so many do not survive the winter. You only need to spay/neuter/vaxx the rest and have them be adopted. Doesn't work here because these things don't die off naturally and when there's enough of them to form literal wolf-packs, they LITERALLY just start hunting kids for food. Man that poor autistic boy, the villagers are still in shock.

Who tf is going to adopt murder dogs? We don't even allow dogs indoors or consider animals family the way they do in white western countries, it is not our culture. Animals get treated like animals, not people. In fact, dog lovers adopting fancy breeds to raise and then letting them loose in the streets when they get sick and difficult to look after (apparently long-haired western breeds don't do well in the tropics and get sick, WHO'D HAVE THOUGHT 🙄) are the ones that caused this in the first place.

Dogs regularly break into daycares and playschools and attack kids. It's happened multiple times over the last decade. I've seen idiot animal activists even call for an end to spaying/neutering because "dogs have a right to natural reproduction like people do". This is who you're arguing with.

[nikethestatue]

I fall in love with elain in ACOMAF when she tells cassian ‘’ it was not nesta’s neglect alone that is to blame. We were scared, and had received no training, and everything had been taken, and we failed her. Both of us.

For me the fact that she accepted her mistake in front of fae was so brave of her. I fall in love with her in that chapter she wanted to help feyre she knows she did wrong and wants to repay feyre because she gave and gave for years

Putting that a side we learn that it was not fear that keep nesta from helping but her hate. She hated his dad so much that it was eating her alive and I have forgive and understand nesta it must had been really hard for her to move on from that hate. We learn on acosf that nesta feels guilty and that she loves feyre

Now with elain we know it was not hate but actually fear. She said “we were scared” the tremblin fawn and fanged beast. Elain was so scared that the fear probably paralyzed her from helping feyre, this is just what I think is the reason elain didn’t help feyre (fear) of all of them elain was more scared of the fae. I also think elain was scared of killing any living creature she probably was scared of haunting. I think is amazing to see she went from I dont know how to get my hand dirty to let me kill the king of hybern our lovely fawn is showing her fanged beast side

Maybe it was no fear this is just what i think is the reason she didn’t help. I think one of the biggest question in acotar is: why Feyre sister didn’t help her? Anyway what do you believe it was elain reasons? Of course they main guilty are their parents but I really wanna hear elain side

Love ur blog it has an amazing energy ❤️

Thank you! I appreciate that.

So I think that it's fairly simple--while Nesta was angry, especially at her father (her resentment of Feyre has never been well explained, so I don't want to tackle that), I think in Elain's case, it was a matter of simple...acceptance? She is obviously not an angry person, so I think that she basically just accepted her new reality. We all do. I am not sure how deeply SJM thought of this, but from my personal experience--I've lived in a lot of countries, and in various conditions. There were times when we were extremely poor and ate nothing but beans and there were times where we were well off. And as you begin to exist in whatever the situation is, you begin to adapt. And I think that's what Elain is about--adaptability. I can see her not thinking that she needed to help, because that was Feyre's 'job' and her job was taking care of the house. Feyre was 'the hunter' and Elain was 'the gatherer' -- obviously someone had to tend to the house, cook and clean and patch clothes and get water from the well and keep the fire going and do laundry and everything else. She and Nesta did that. The father couldn't, so everything fell on their shoulders.

It's very very obvious reading ACOTAR that SJM herself has never been hungry or poor. She comes from a nice, well-off, privileged background and notions of what true poverty is and what it takes to survive EVERY DAY are very removed from her. So she took the most basic of acts that she was familiar with--hunting--and basically made that the only 'important' action that the heroine could do. Something 'active' and of course something that led to the development of the rest of the story. But in reality, Feyre resented her sisters because she had to go and hunt, though of course they still did a ton of work at home. But that's the problem with the first person narrative. You only see one side of the coin.

[landmineradio]

on my knees and hands begging you to tell me ur secret bc i also wanna get my life together ...

honestly nona, it’ll definitely vary from person to person so i cannot guarantee what i did will work for everyone. esp if we have different carrer goals.

for me, i dropped out of college in my 1st semester ever and didn’t re-enroll again until 2021. i worked retail in that time between which i absolutely hated. part of why my life was a mess to begin with was because i was dealing with severe anhedonia, i kept making decisions and flaking out of opportunities before i could even start which was basically self-sabotage. this and having no support system really messed me up that i got hospitalized & went back to my home country. i had to renew my visa again and re-enrolled in school again, this time i actually finished and graduated!!

and like if i had to be completely honest, i think i did better this time around vs my first year, because i actually felt i was ready to tackle school vs being a clueless and scared 18 year old in a foreign country. so i chalk it up to maturing in those years i felt i “wasted”

[selznick]

i fucking hate this country, and yknow, id love to leave but im actually too dumb to function by myself, or to properly research which countries would be better and how to actually move

i cant even find a job here, never mind a different country, where id have no one to support me. im too fucking stupid to do anything for myself

csnt even kill myself cuz my ocd cancels out my suicidal tendencies. too mentally ill to die 🤪

im too scared to come out cuz i cant loose my family, like i Need their support to do anything. and ik my dad is transphobic but idk how he'd react to me being trans. and idk abt the rest of my family. im also shit at researching anythong so idk properly how id go abt transitioning here.. like im p sure you have to be "socially" out for like 2 yrs before ur even considered viable for physical transitioning.. but again i dont wanna risknmy support so i cant do that

and i wanna die so bad but i cant even do that soooooo. forever stuck in this hell country

[www-jungwon]

Frrr tests are really so so stressful I hate but once over I have no idea what to do it feels wrong to sit idle lmao, it's the effort that count don't be too sad,, lmk once you get the scores!!

as for my paper well i did way way way better than i thought i would, i was scared i wouldn't pass but now i think i probably will hopefully i mean like prepared for the worst. and that was my pro course exam now i have my uni exam next month hopefully i pass that too🥹🥹

ikkkk like i cant change anything after but i still try to figure out what i got wrong n stuff and it js makes me feel worse 😭

i did get my scores back !! i’m kinda in shock i got the highest possible percentile out of my grade in my whole country ??? 😭😭 which is so wilddd but ur 100% right like it’s js a number and what matters is trying and actually understanding things so i feel like letter grades and that kind of thing are so not-applicable to the real world (but it feels good to get high scores 🥲)

and yess !! i always think tests and things are going to be way worse than they are but gl on ur uni exam and congrats on ur paper not being terrible :)))