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nobutfredweasleytho · 3 years

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YOU JUST DON’T LISTEN(F.W)

Summary: Fred’s ex girlfriend writes him a letter to explain the how him using her wrecked her emotionally.

Warnings: angst, like a lot of angst, depressed Y/N, mentions of self doubt, a little swearing, mentions of parents not loving correctly, used reader. Let me know if I missed anything.

A/N: Major thank you to Gabriella @onlyfreds for being an amazing person and encouraging me to write whatever this mess is. I am forever grateful to you

(The font is terrible Im sorry im just getting used to working on tumblr)

Fred Weasley checked the muggle clock on his nightstand. 10:30 AM. His mom will call him for breakfast anytime now. He has been awake for quite some time if he can even count the 30 minutes he tried to sleep but couldn’t, not when every time he tries to close his eyes his mind and eventually dreams are clouded by her. By the last time he looked at her, how devastated she looked, How her face was wet from her tears and her eyes bloodshot red, but the thing Fred will never be able to forget is her voice. How raw and vulnerable she sounded while saying the most horrible thing’s anyone has ever said to him, but he can’t blame her, he has no one to blame but himself because in the end it was he who caused all of this and now its come to bite him in the ass. He hears the door open and his twin brother George enters.

“Mom says breakfast is ready and she wants you downstairs. She says she’ll drag you herself if you don’t show up again today.”

“Tell her I’m not hungry and I’ll come grab a bite later.” I really don’t feel like being surrounded by other people right now. Not in this pathetic state I’m in. Besides it will take me willpower I don’t have to not hex Ron into oblivion.

“Well she will not take no for an answer and I wont either. What’s done is done now and you’ll have to face the world someday so start with your own family because everyone down there is worried sick about you and the least you can do is show your face once in a while so they know you haven’t died of starvation or sleep deprivation.” George has worry written all over him and I’m sure the rest of the family has it too. I feel even more like shit for worrying them.

“Fine. But I come back here if she is mentioned are we clear?”

“We weren’t gonna mention Y/N anyway now lets go moms worried sick for your dumbass.”

Breakfast was going smoothly with Ginny and Ron being exited for Quidditch season, Harry and Bill discussing the unfortunate events of the Triwizard tournament last year, dad asking Hermione about a rubber duck whatever that is, but the most shocking thing is mom asking me and George about the joke shop products. George is doing most of the talking but still the fact that shes even asking is awesome. I was finally feeling peaceful this whole winter break until I heard a hoot outside the window.

“I thought it was Tuesday but since mail is here does it mean its Friday already? Oh how fast time is going.

“No Arthur honey you are right it is Tuesday, Bill or George can one of you see if that owl has the owners name attached to it and bring whatever letter he has here to see who is it for.”

Bill got up from his seat and went to the window next to the countertop to look at the mystery owl. “Do we even know a Y/N Y/L/N?”

The room went quiet. The only thing that could be heard was the owls hoot asking for its treat. Bill seemed not to realise this as he took the letter from the owl, gave him a treat and sent it on its way.

“To Fred Weasley from Y/N Y/L/N�� Who’s Y/N is she the girl you’ve been crying over this whole time huh Freddie?” Bill chuckled but I just grabbed the letter. I had no time to even be mad at him because once again my mind fogs up with only her. I couldn’t help but feel relieved and the happiest I felt in a long time. She has forgiven me. Y/N forgave me. That has to be it. Why else would she send me a letter?

“I had a great time with you guys but there’s important matters for me to attend so I have to go to now. Thanks mom the breakfast was amazing as always.” And with that I sprinted towards my room, locked the door and examined the letter in my hands. It was a bunch of them in here. I went to mine and George’s worktable threw some papers that were on top of it to make room for these letters and carefully opened the envelope.

The first thing that I grabbed was a photo. It was a polaroid of me and Y/N on the Gryffindor common room. Happiness filled my heart when I started remembering this night. I looked at the back of the polaroid and surely enough there was a writing on it.

Fred and Yn on the Gryffindor common room at 1 AM the night she turned 17. Listening to ABBA’s “Dancing Queen”. Picture taken by major 3rd wheel George Weasley.

Tears filled my eyes when I remember this night. It was the night I looked at her the way I always should have. Not as a replacement of someone who didn’t care about me.

The next one was also a polaroid photograph but this one I don’t remember being taken. It’s a picture of Y/N teaching me how to play the guitar. I can make up that we are in her dorm but not more as the picture is taken in black and white. I look at the back and surely this one also has a writing on it but the handwriting doesn’t look familiar at all.

A drunken Y/N accompanied by a even drunker Fred trying to play the guitar in the middle of the night. If I fail my charms exam tomorrow I’m killing you both but right now you two look adorable. Picture taken by Cho Chang.

The third one is an actual letter. I chuckle looking at the handwriting. Always so precise and not even one line out of place. I always thought Y/Ns handwriting always contradicts her hot headed persona but it’s actually really cute. I start reading the letter and my heart stops.

Dear Freddie,

I can only imagine the shock that receiving a letter from me would cause you right now especially after our last conversation.

But I have a lot to get off of my chest and I wont be able to move on if I haven’t said it all. Call me a coward but I was really scared to ask you to meet me so I can say it in person, but maybe that’s what I have always been. A coward. A coward because I get scared when someone wants to enter my life, a coward because I hate trying new things at the expense of failing, a coward because I should be able to confront people who brought darkness and sadness to my life.

But one thing I will admit Fred Weasley is that I wasn’t a coward when It came to loving you. It was the first time that I let someone come into my life and heart the way you did, and it will probably be the last. Throughout our “relationship” if you can even call it that as it was more of you customizing me to be her, to be someone I’m not. But that’s why you even talked to me is it, because I reminded you of her.

The signs were right in front of me and I feel stupid enough not to have seen them. But I guess people are right when they say love is blind. Love is such a funny thing to me as the first time I experienced the right kind of love was through you. But that was me creating stuff in my head. You didn’t love me no, you loved the idea of me. But I loved you. I loved you more than anything or anyone I have ever loved, I loved everything about you. But you just don’t listen. You don’t listen to anyone around you. Not George, not your other siblings, not Lee or any of your other friends for that matter, not your professors, but most importantly you don’t listen to me.

You didn’t listen when I told you that the love my parents gave me was only because I reminded them of my brother, the love my old friends back home gave me was one of interest. Everywhere I go no matter who I talk to no one will love me for me. I came to accept that until I met you.

You were funny and crazy and brave and oh so gorgeous. You were basically everything I looked for in… well everything. In a friend or in a partner it doesn’t matter. I thought you saw me for who I am. A broken teenager with issues but that at the end of the day was deserving of love. Oh how wrong I have been but no more wrong than you. You knew this but you just didn’t listen.

That makes us both horrible people now does it. Me who thought you were some kind of savior or some kind of saint and selfishly wrapped myself around your love and you who used me because I remind you of your ex girlfriend who broke your heart. But mine is excused I feel like and yours isn’t.

You would have kept me going for who knows how long just so you can live your imaginations you had for someone else.

Did you think about her the first time we slept together?

Was I not enough for you Freddie?

Was I too clingy too soon?

Is it my hot temper that gets the best of me?

So many questions will be left unanswered on my end because frankly, I never want to speak of you again. Sure I am deprived of love but I will not take it if its not directed directly at me.

I still care about you and will continue to support you and George on whatever you set your mind into. I was waking through Diagon Alley last week and saw this little store with a “for sale” sign. It’s right in the middle of Diagon Alley. I hate how my first thought went that you would have loved it but I seem to do that a lot recently.

I’ll get dressed and think would Fred love this skirt or this shirt.

I start applying lipstick and I’ll think will Fred love this color.

I start eating and I’ll think does this look good enough that Fred would’ve stolen a piece of it when I’m talking to Ginny.

I don’t even know why I am telling you this. How pathetic I’ve become clinging into someone that doesn’t want me.

Anyway I’ve probably bored you enough with my ranting but I wouldn’t have been able to move on unless I said everything that felt heavy on my heart. I also attached some photos I thought you’d like to keep seeing as now you can see yourself with Kayla without having the burden to be near me.

Say hi to your siblings and Harry for me.

Have a nice life,

Y/N

#harry potter #fred x y/n #fred weasley series #fred weasley x reader #fred weasley imagine #fred weasley #fred weasley angst #george weasley #hogwarts #fred and goerge weasley #weasley family #sadnees #i hate this

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worldwidemochiguy · 4 years

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expectation ≠ reality (18+)

When you first met Jungkook, he was so kind, with wide eyes and a sweet smile, but soon enough he dragged you into a tumultuous marriage where you were barely allowed to draw breath on your own. But, when you meet Taehyung, the cute delivery boy with blond hair and a penchant for flirting, you start to wonder if you’ve found your second chance.

Masterlist

Warnings: Yandere behaviour, possessive behaviour, slight dub-con, graphic penetrative sex, DO NOT READ IF YOU ARE A MINOR pls im not tryna get arrested or anything

Word Count: 4K

a/n: thanks to @gucieguciekook for requesting !! hope u enjoy lol <3

Expectation ≠ Reality

You have had enough.

From the moment you agreed to marry him, Jungkook had been getting steadily worse and worse. He had always been possessive to a fault, but you mistakenly saw it as a sign he truly cared and treasured you. You cooed over his obsession with littering hickeys all over your neck, blushed when he called you ‘Mine. Only mine.’ When he asked you to move in way too quickly, you thought it was a sign he was committed to your relationship.

How wrong you were.

Not that he isn’t committed, of course. God, if there was ever a word to describe Jeon Jungkook, it was committed. He is obsessed with you. He slowly started cutting you off from the outside world, persuading you to stay in when your friends invited you out, and convincing you they were terrible people when they inevitably stopped interacting with you. You had cut out everyone else in your life because of him.

Your parents:

babe, they don’t approve of our relationship because they don’t want you to be happy with your own life, they want to control you and treat you like a kid. you don’t need them anyway, you have me.

Your coworkers:

i called in sick for you today, babe. you don’t need to go there anymore, i have more than enough money for the both of us.

Even your pet:

your cat? oh, i’m sorry baby, she got hit by a car. no, don’t cry, baby, now you can give all of your attention to me instead of that rancid furball.

Jungkook had isolated you and exhausted you to the point where you agreed to marry him, convinced it could not make your life any worse.

Again, you were wrong.

With his ring on now your finger, Jungkook is even more assured of his ownership of you. You are no longer allowed to cook or go into the garden, both deemed as dangerous activities where you could somehow be harmed by a vegetable peeler, or maybe grass cuttings. You have no access to the internet, and the only books you are permitted to read are simple, dull books with no plot or dusty old historical text books, obviously the only things Jungkook is certain wouldn’t give you ‘silly ideas to confuse your pretty little head.’

~~~~

“Jungkook,” You murmur, voice muffled as he presses your face into the pillow.

“Yeah, baby, say my name just like that.” He grunts, attempting to tug off your skirt with one hand while the other is fisted in your hair. You roll your eyes and shift your weight so he can take it off properly. After he had separately ripped all your pants at some point in his haste to take them off you, you had realised it was simply easier to wear something less finicky.

As soon your lower half is bared for him, he starts running his large palms greedily over your skin, for his own benefit rather than yours.

“Fuck, look at you.” He mutters, before digging a thumb into a bruise he had left on your ass. You yelp and he chuckles lowly behind you. Just as you expect, he presses firmly on the bruise and you clench your teeth, burying your nails in your palms and refusing to make a noise. He waits for a second, but you remain stubbornly silent.

“Huh,” he says, “I guess baby’s pain threshold has risen a bit, yeah?” He strokes a possessive hand between your shoulder blades and you repress a shiver, before he loops his arm around you and lifts you onto your hands and knees.

“I guess I’ll just have to fuck you harder then.” He resolves, before shoving himself into you roughly.

Jungkook is not small, putting it lightly, though you hate to afford any kind of praise to that bastard. He is long, and thick, and you really hadn’t been very turned on at all, just letting him do what he wanted so that he’d leave you alone, so you don’t blame yourself too much when a scream bursts out of your lips. You can barely hear his smug laugh behind you over the burning sensation in your core. He doesn’t give you any time at all to adjust, roughly pumping himself in and out as you try to hold in your whimpers.

“So fucking tight, baby.” He grunts in your ear, punctuating his words with harsh slaps against your thigh, “You sure you can handle my cock?” This is his offer: Admit that I’m hurting you, admit that you’re weak and at my mercy, and I’ll stop. That’s all you have to do.

You clench your teeth and press your face into the pillow again.

He sighs behind you, though you can tell he’s quietly pleased, before pulling out of you and walking away. Him yanking out and leaving you roughly stretched and exposed to the cold air is almost as painful as when he shoved into you in the first place, and when he returns you resent yourself for feeling the slightest hint of relief.

He is carrying a bottle of lube, normally used for when he decides he wants to fuck your ass instead. You tense up, preparing to swallow your pride and beg him not to — it’s been a while and you’re not sure you can take the pain — but he senses your fear and smirks.

“Don’t worry baby, I’m just gonna make it a bit easier for you.” As he speaks, he’s slicking up his cock and soon enough he’s getting back up on his knees and taking ahold of your hips, pushing himself in slightly gentler this time.

The coolness of the gel soothes — but doesn’t eradicate — the burn and Jungkook has started to move in long, rolling strokes inside you that are almost pleasant.

“See, baby?” Jungkook coos as his hands move around to stroke your stomach, “I don’t want to hurt you, you have to know that. I hate hurting you, but you never tell me to stop. You have to know your limits, baby girl. You’re just not strong enough.”

His words — though patronising, and awful, and the kind of thing that make you want to whack him in the neck with one of those massive historical tomes he provides you — are spoken in that soft, Jungkook tone that he used to make you fall in love with him. It reminds you of those days when he was just Kookie, your cute study partner with a bunny smile and a pretty singing voice and broad muscly shoulders that flushed along with the rest of his body when you complimented him.

The Jungkook that you know him as now — the one swiftly bringing you to a reluctant and resentful orgasm — is the opposite of soft. He is rough and impulsive and controlling and you honestly fear what would happen if you tried to ask him for a divorce. He wouldn’t let you go, probably. He’d just laugh at you, and then shove you down and fuck you to make you remember who you really belonged to, like he is doing now.

You try to contain your pants as Jungkook starts a series of staccato thrusts. You are sure Jungkook would hear you, even over the obscene sound of his hips slapping into the back of your thighs, and would be obnoxiously proud about it for the next month. He would already be smug enough having made you come, which you have given up trying to stave off because Jungkook — damn him — is really good at fucking you until you can’t remember your own name.

He reaches around to pinch your clit harshly and you decide that now is as good a time as any to give up your last remaining vestiges of pride. You come with a piercing whine, clenching around him rhythmically until his hips stutter and you feel the unpleasant sensation of warmth spilling into you. He doesn’t stop, pumping every last drop into you and then dropping on top of you, pinning your body to the mattress.

After a while he rearranges himself so that he is spooning you, arms wrapped stiflingly tight around your waist, and his now-flaccid cock still tucked inside you. You grimace. Jungkook had always fallen fast asleep after sex, but now you are wide awake, hyperaware as he snores behind you. You don’t know what you’ve become. You hate him. But sometimes he says things that make you wish he wasn’t a monster, that make you wish he was the boy with soft smiles and expressive eyes that you had fallen in love with. You live for the resurgences of that humanity, because it is the only thing you have to look forward to, apart from the eventual day when Jungkook finally snaps and kills you.

~~~~

“Jungkook,” you say over breakfast, and he looks up with his cheeks full of pancake.

“Yes, my angel?” He asks, eyes twinkling — he loves when you say his name — and your breath catches, and for a second everything is perfect and you are having breakfast across from a boy who loves you more than anything. And then you see the annoyed glint in his eye — you hadn’t immediately answered his question — and you come crashing back to bitter reality.

“I-” You start, then stop, unsure of how to phrase the question into a compliment, that way Jungkook is more likely to give you what you want.

“Say what you want to say, baby. You know how I hate to be kept waiting…” He gives you a shark’s smile.

“I… I really loved all the books you gave me.” You tell him, making sure your voice is exactly the correct tone of gushing admiration.

“Really?” He replies, a pleased expression on his face as he strokes your hair back gently.

“Yes, and I- I was wondering if maybe… I could have some more?”

His hand drifts down to rest at the hollow of your throat. It curls slightly.

“N-not that I’m not grateful-” You stammer, “B-But… I liked them all so much I read them too quickly, and now I have nothing else to do with you’re gone.” You end the statement with a playful pout, and you feel your self-loathing level up a notch.

“Baby, you have to remember to take your time with things like that.” Jungkook grinned, standing up and getting his briefcase. You move to the door where you are supposed to administer a farewell kiss before he goes to work, just like always.

He smiles, satisfied, before looking sideways slightly so you can get up on your tiptoes to kiss his cheek. He reaches around to squeeze your ass quickly, smirking when you squeak in shock.

“Don’t be greedy baby, take what you’re given.” He tosses a ‘Love you!’ over his shoulder as he goes, and when you call it back the words taste sour on your tongue. You wonder if you had ever uttered those words sincerely.

~~~~

You had been thinking Jungkook had forgotten about your request for books, so when the doorbell rings at six o clock and you answer it to see a cute delivery boy with a bundle of books tucked under his arm, you are surprised to say the least.

“D-Delivery for Jeon Jungkook?” He stutters, and you had been expecting him to have a slightly high, nervous voice so the deep, thick drawl shocks you in more ways than one. You can feel yourself melt just looking at him. His eyes are so… innocent, just like Jungkook’s when you first saw him. His nose cutely scrunches as his blond hair — longer than Jungkook’s — falls in soft clumps over his eyes. He huffs a lopsided breath and the light strands flutter about momentarily, before settling back just where they were. You think you’ve fallen in love.

You realise you’ve been staring at him this entire time, but to be fair, he has been staring right back, and you feel yourself become flustered.

“Uh, yeah, that’s me. That’s my package.”

“Sorry ma’am,” He starts in his honey voice, before grinning. He seems to gain confidence due to your flustered state. “-but this package is addressed to a Mr Jeon Jungkook, and you certainly don’t look like a ‘Mr’.” He mutters as his eyes drag up and down your form. You are only in your nightie — Jungkook always likes it when you wear pretty, flimsy things — and this stranger’s gaze is making you blush in a way you know Jungkook wouldn’t be happy about.

“Yeah, that’s… uh, that’s my husband. Jeon Jungkook.”

“Your husband, huh?” The delivery boy does not seem put off by the mention of a husband, in fact, he seems almost spurred on by it. “And where is Mr Jeon Jungkook right now?”

“He’s working late. He would normally be back by now but he called and said he’s spending the night at the office.”

“Working late, huh?” The delivery boy repeats in that cocky drawl, and oddly enough, it reminds you of Jungkook. “You know, if I had a wife like you waiting for me to come home, I don’t know if I’d even make it out of bed long enough to go to work in the morning, let alone stay there overnight.”

Your eyes widen as your cheeks darken, and his open, bright laughter is the nicest thing you’ve heard in months.

“What happened to the nervous delivery boy?” You spluttered indignantly, and his laughing slowed down, though his eyes were still twinkling. Just like Jungkook’s used to do.

“He relaxed when he realised you were just as affected by him as he was by you.”

“Who says I’m affected by you?” You ask boldly, and then immediately retreat a step when he moves towards you.

“You’re giving yourself away, sweetheart.” He smirks, before advancing another step into your home. “You know… empty house… husband at work… it seems a waste not to use this opportunity.” He waggles his eyebrows at you, and you scoff, forcing him back with both hands until he is outside the door again. He lets you push him with a brow raised lazily.

“That sounded like a line from a bad porno, and I’m pretty sure Jungkook would literally kill me if he found out.” You fake a laugh, covering up your very real and valid fear that Jungkook would actually kill you.

“Jungkook’s the possessive type, huh?”

Yes, you scream internally.

“Well, I’m pretty sure no husband would like delivery boys sleeping with their wives.”

“What about delivery boys visiting their wives during the day?”

You pause, hands floating in midair, about to take the parcel out of the delivery boy’s hands.

“Huh?”

“I could come around in the day while your husband’s at work-” He sped up when you raised your brows, “-not to do anything, or at least, anything that you’re uncomfortable with, but just to talk. I can tell you’re lonely.” You scoff and roll your eyes, ignoring the fact that he’s absolutely correct. You turn back to him, ready to decline his offer, when you see his puppy eyes. Your resolve crumbles.

“I don’t know,” You had no way of telling what punishments Jungkook would submit you to if he found out. He didn’t even let you talk to your parents, so you could hardly imagine he’d be pleased with you chatting to young, attractive men while alone at your house.

“Come on!” The delivery boy wheedled. “He’d never know. He’s practically asking for it, he leaves you alone day after day, all you have for company are these stupid books!” A dismissive gesture to the collection of Austen, Dickens and Shakespeare you are carrying. “Aren’t you bored? Don’t you want a little excitement?”

You tiredly fumble around for an excuse.

“I don’t even know your name.”

“My name’s Taehyung.” He introduces himself promptly. “I’d like to visit you tomorrow at lunch time, if that’s alright.”

“You sure you don’t have a delivery then?” You ask hopefully.

“I don’t.”

You release a weary sigh.

“You’re going to come no matter what I say, aren’t you?” He responds with a blinding grin.

“I love that we’re learning things about each other! You can already anticipate my actions,” He starts listing off ‘facts’ on his fingers, “you know my name, I know you’re trapped in an unsatisfying marriage-”

“I’ll see you tomorrow Taehyung.” You shut the door firmly, cutting him off.

You hear a muffled ‘can’t wait!’ from the other side of the door and if you happen to blush and giggle like a lovesick schoolgirl it doesn’t matter because no one else is there and therefore it cannot be proved.

~~~~

Taehyung starts paying you regular visits. He keeps up his job obligations even when he’s off the clock, bringing you food that Jungkook wouldn’t let you eat, newspapers since Jungkook doesn’t let you know what was going on in the outside world, and even snapshots of his day.

Taehyung is an aspiring photographer. He has a small apartment outside of the city and an obsession with strawberries and a dog called Yeontan. He has a life, a life that you are desperately beginning to yearn for. Taehyung tells you once that he wishes he could take a photo of you outside, because he knows this perfect spot — a field full of wildflowers and sunshine that would compliment your beauty perfectly — and you burst into tears.

You tell him, as he rocks you gently in his arms, that you are trapped by Jungkook. That you hate your husband more than anything. That you can’t remember the last time you felt the sun on your skin. And so, quietly, carefully, the two of you begin to plot.

It is not as simple as calling the police. Jungkook has enough money that there is no crime he cannot buy his way out of, no officer he cannot bribe into submission. No, you have to disappear completely. You begin passing along your possessions to Taehyung so he can take them back to his place, gradually, so that Jungkook doesn’t notice you are withdrawing from his life one pair of shoes at a time.

You daren’t risk taking any money of Jungkook, but Taehyung tells you it isn’t a problem, which is slightly strange since you know Taehyung must have quit his delivery boy job so that he could see you every day, and surely he could do with some extra cash. You tell yourself it’s sweet that he doesn’t care about material things, he just cares about you.

“What are these?” Jungkook asks one morning, when he is greeted not with eggs sunny side up and a kiss, but a stack of papers.

“A divorce contract.” You tell him, trying to ignore the waver in your voice. He only raises an eyebrow at you, and you blanch.

You had been expecting yelling, threats, maybe even violence. Taehyung had begged you to just leave without a trace, and abandon Jungkook to his own horrid life of loneliness, but you just can’t do that, even if it is the safer option. There is still a small, pathetic part of you that clings to the idea of Kookie, the boy with wire-rimmed glasses and carefree smiles who always accepted your help with questions he couldn’t answer. Even though you know that side of him is now long-dead, if it ever even existed in the first place.

However, Jungkook is currently subverting all of your expectations. He sits there calmly, leafing through the papers.

“These don’t make any sense.” He remarks. You attempt to snatch them back, but he holds them out of your reach.

“Yes, well, I wasn’t really expecting you to read them.” You reply, embarrassed. The fake contract had been your idea, a way of telling Jungkook you wanted a divorce without actually saying the words. Of course, you had expected him to fling them into the fire, or something equally as dramatic, not read through them carefully and snort at all the typos.

“I understand.” He declares eventually. “You want my attention, so you’re pretending that you want to leave me. Very funny, baby.”

“That’s not true!” You burst out, cheeks burning. “I am leaving you, divorce contract or not.”

“Hush, baby, you know I don’t like it when you lie.” Jungkook purrs, his eyes burning dangerously.

“I don’t care what you like anymore, Jungkook.” You respond, suddenly furious, “I’ve spent so many years as your wife, being terrified by you, being controlled and miserable. Now I’ve got Taehyung, and I’m finally happy! I love him, Jungkook, not you. I’m leaving.”

You turn away and storm to the door, but hesitate when you hear Jungkook chuckle.

“If you think you are liberating yourself by going to Kim Taehyung… you are wrong, baby.”

“H-How do you know his family name?” You ask, fear starting to invade your mind.

“I know a lot of things about Mr Kim,” Jungkook spits, and his anger starts to bleed through. “He is not who you think he is, baby. Are you sure you want to go?” His patronising tone is the last straw for you.

“I’d rather die than stay here with you.”

“Who knows, baby, Mr Kim might just fulfil your wish.” You blanch again, hesitating with your hand on the lock, a breath away from freedom.

“Y-You’re just trying to scare me.” You stutter, and you hear him sigh behind you.

“No, baby, I’m trying to warn you, but you insist on being so, so dumb. I don’t like to see you hurt, remember? But, if this will teach you a lesson about how lucky you are to have me, I guess I’ll have to let you go. Just remember, baby, when you’re with him and it’s not all you expect it to be, I will be coming for you.” As he speaks, he rises from his seat and moves across the room until he is right behind you, his breath ghosting on the back of your neck as you stubbornly refuse to turn, hand still poised on the latch.

“I’m not coming back.” You whisper, and you feel a huff of laughter against your neck.

“No, baby, I’ll rescue you, and take you back. I promise, you’ll be counting the days until you’re in my arms again.”

~~~~

Jungkook watches from the window as your harried form disappears into the distance. Cursing softly to himself, he turns on his phone and pulls up a number he is loathe to possess.

“So, she left you, huh?” A cocky voice drawls across the line.

“Shut it, Kim.” Jungkook snaps, “She’s still my wife, she still belongs to me.”

“Oh? You didn’t sign the divorce papers?”

“Yes, very funny by the way, Kim. ‘I hereby announce that Kim Taehyung has been our mother’s favourite from the moment of his conception.’ You should’ve become a comic instead of a criminal.” Jungkook reads a line from the fake files.

“Well, I could say the same to you, baby brother, allowing your wife to leave you like this. It’s the funniest thing I’ve heard in years.”

“Half-brother.” Jungkook growls. “And she hasn’t left me.”

“The tracker I planted on her begs to differ.”

“She’s just…” Jungkook huffs, “Confused.”

“No, she’s just got good taste, obviously.”

“You really are pathetic, stealing your little brother’s toys like this, hyung.” Jungkook taunts. “Soon, very soon, I’m going to come and get her back. I better not find her too broken when I get there.”

Jungkook hangs up, mutters a curse under his breath, and then starts planning the inevitable gang war he’s going to have to embroil himself in because his wife can’t keep her damn legs closed.

#yandere #Yandere jungkook #yandere bts #yandere jungkook x reader #jeon jungkook #bts jungkook #jungkook #jungkook x reader #yandere kpop #yandere taehyung #yandere taehyung x reader #bts taehyung #bts taehyung x reader #bts fanfic #bts fic #bts fanfiction #bts smut #jungkook smut

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lgcmax · 4 years

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hellooooo my legacy loves !! i hope life’s been treating you all well ! i know right now things are still pretty difficult ( as been all of 2020 tbh ), so i just wanted to flood the dash w a little positivity !! you know, sometimes i feel bad because it seems that i can’t connect with everyone as much as i’d like, and it sucks !! but between my spotty activity at times and bad response times i didn’t want you to think i loved you all any less. so !!! below you will find a love letter to all of you lovely muns as well as some individual comments about my favorite thing about your muses everybody ! also, if you have lgc friends who aren’t really dash scrollers feel free to share this with them so that they can see !! anyways, go ahead and enjoy 😇💖

dear legacy,

okay - let me start by saying - i care for you sooooo so much !! and that goes for ALL of you reading this !! even if we’ve never talked, or you just joined, or we talk like every other month but never seem to catch each other at the right time ? i care for you !!! and don’t you ever forget it. honestly, legay is one of the healthiest places i’ve been in to develop my muse in a safe space, void of any judgement or just weird vibes. and that has to do with all of you, and i’d like to thank you for that !! our mods, of course, get a special hug for all that you guys do - i know that things can get hard, and we test your patience sometimes ... i get it !! but to us, you’re kinda like our rp parents ?? we might nag, joke, and annoy but it’s all out of love, we promise ahaha !! anywho, once again everyone i’ve met in legacy, has no lie been so special to me ?? and i want you guys to know that !! literally all of you, even if it was just a quick message, have made an imprint on the great rp experience i’ve had here and i’d like to thank you for that ! and no this isn’t me leaving, i promise i’m gonna stick around for a loong time to come ahaha. but honestly, who would’ve thought ? i was bouncing around from rp to rp, and i didn’t recall, if i’m being hoenst, expect anything to come out of me giving this place a shot for the 2nd time ? but i’m so grateful to have gotten such a wonderful experience that made me not want to leave. there’s always things to do, muses to meet, and it’s crazy how well everyone keeps the dash flowing ! i’m always excited to look at what you and your muses are up too, and honestly i’m lowkey invested in all their little relationships lol ?? but that’s what makes this place so special ! the friendships, the enemies, the romance, and everything in between has made this into such a unique writing atmosphere to be a part of. so for that, i say thank you. and here’s to more legacy for years to come !!

now for the special portion of my letter !!! in alphabetical order, you will find a compliment of mine for your muse below !! phew, here i go :

( and pls ... if i forgot u ... i apologize 20000x !! PLEASE tell me lol !! obviously this is for muses who are here at the time of writing this 10/2/2020, and i may update ! but if your muse is here at that time and you don’t see them PLEASE tell me i want to write them something but i might have accidentally deleted someone’s in the process of writing so many ! )

phunsawat kannika first of all i have the fattest crush on her fc ojoijjoioij !! anyways, i love the commitment to all her pages, all her character inspos are my favorite, and i’m really interested to see her adjustment to korea ! i think she’s doing a great job already and will show that she can go even further !

yoon aria i haven’t got to say it yet but i LOVE how much of a meme she is oijoiiooij !! esp since she’s a model, it’s fun to have one who’s this cool model on camera but honestly so real and fun ?? like it gives her so much depth and i’m sure she’ll develop a loyal fanbase of like-minded goofs ? i want her and nari to interact tbh haha !!

lee benji my KING ! i love seeing benji develop his sense of purpose and try to see what he wants to become in the long run, and also how he’s stayed true to himself even after mocing to a whole different country ! and of course, his commitment to caring for others !

pongsak tee i ship jinseo and tee oijojoijoij !!!!!! anywho we love the thai representation, i really have enjoyed seeing tee’s progress over the past few months and how he’s adapting to slowly coming into the starlight ? it seems he’s still managed to maintain his kindness and i really enjoy that about him !

im nari is void because she is my muse but i love her very much hee hee !!

kang eunho first off as i’m writing this i see eunho’s first words for his babysitting solo is him flipping out over how cute babies are and i just think that’s adorable lol. but anywho ! eunho’s such a little sunshine and def gives me baby energy ?? light of my life. he’s like legacy’s daily dose of vitamins !

im bomi hana ... my favorite girl who i’m in love with ojjojjoijioji !! i think hana is so weird and goofy in the BEST ways and she’s an example of someone who’s not a famous girl, but a girl who happened to get famous ? i love her for her quirks and all her uniqueness, gamer girls ftw, 10/10 main character material !

hwang minjun i also love shinha and minjun too lmao !!! they are ... v cute !! i love how warm minjun’s heart is from what i’ve seen, and how open and accepting he is to all types of people and welcomes them to his warm fuzzy heart !!! also i would like to personally thank him for taking max in when they were in tokyo max DOES NOT deserve !

kim jinah ah i love her sm !! i know it sounds like max talking, but i love how she’s basically one of the bros lmao ?? but really ! i love her dually embracing of her cuter side and her more casual one, and how she just seems like the type of person you can have a drink and a good talk with ? and her interactions w junghwan stand out and give her an unexpected soft side !

lee yushin i feel like yushin is the younger brother we all wish we had but don’t deserve !! just a real fresh breath of air, definitely a little goofy but just as sweet ?? has the capability to win over even the coldest muses hearts ! and i am rooting for actor yushin 100%. you got this bud !!!!

kim nami somehow nami always pops up first on my dashboard but i’m not mad about it at all lol !! and i think nami is actually very multi-dimensional ! she already seems pretty sure of where she wants herself to go, and i think she’s going to make a really good senior to mentor junior trainees once she’s debuted for a bit ! she def will come correct !!!

lin yue the way i’m SO invested in guessing what she’s eating but never can .... ahh !! also she loves martial arts which means nari would love her if she knew her uwu. anyways to me she’s quite the baddie, i feel like she’s got her toes dipped in a lot of things and therefore will be very versatile in what she can do ? i really love that ( outside of her outstanding visuals ) she actually has a v good personality and niche interests !

ahn dohwan i have promised myself i wouldn’t put any emphasis on fcs but since vernon is one of my ults i literally have to say: TASTE. anywho lmao !! dohwan gives me cafe boy vibes ?? hear me out. could totally see him making someone a macchiato while listening to their problems and offering advice ? he just seems like a v good listener & adviser ! i think once he debuts for real for real he’s gonna have a lot of bf material made by fans haha !!

leong charlotte first of all i just need to comment i saw a while ago on the dash when charlotte covered i wait and that was ?? iconic ??? we stan ??? streamday6pls ahem anyways ! her being in a band itself makes her an instant baddie, but beyond that she also seems v kind & passionate from what i’ve seen ! she’s got the cute & the fierce, and because of that i think she’ll be fierce competition in the industry once she debuts !

choi max is my muse however as my first bb here i love him deeply heart heart !!

jung ahin i will not lie i did not know seungwoo before i saw ahin, then realized he kinda looked like wonwoo and started to simp ?? IOJOIJOJ anyway this is more of an ooc note but thank u ahin’s mun for bringing me to the light 😇anyways !! i want ahin to do more things to make himself happy bc i think he really is this close to living his best life !! i want something really really good to make him super happy yk ? also i support his english learning journey !

kang jaemin HI ME REALIZING I NEED TO MESSAGE U BACK I’M SORRY SCREECH anyway !! he has a very warm presence, i feel like even when he debuts he’ll be the approachable type ? but also he’s just so smiley and i love it !! such a little fuzzball !! i do feel like more is going on in jaemin’s head than people would think, though ??

lee jaewoo listen jaewoo is my baby ok ... and he’s nari’s too ! also btw did you ever get that birthday text from her own his acc ? anyways i’m going wayy of topic let’s regroup lol !! i honestly admire the level of passion and drive he has so young, and he’s already come so far ? jaewoo has a lot of love in his heart for people and i hope he keeps that even after years of acting ! he truly is the light of lgc agency uwu !

seo yura i feel like yura is v real ! i think she only hides the things she feels are nessescary about herself, but to me she still comess off as really genuine ? it seems she has many types of connections present in her life, which i really like ! i think she’ll do really good at holding her own once it’s time for her official debut and i’m excited to see what’s ahead !

kang jun i think jun doubts himself far more than he realizes just how much he’s capable of !! jun is so adorable and he might hate me for saying that but it is what it is !! i don’t think he’s recognized his true power yet, and though that’s sort of good at humbling him, i think he will be a beast when he becomes fully confident ?? and i believe he will !! i think getting a proper fanbase will show him just how much he can do !

ji haneul okay haneul made it to type zero, so tbh he already has his life together more than half of us ?? IOJOIJOJ no but for real i think haneul is a true ✨professional ✨even if he wouldn’t believe me if i told him ? although HE might not be so confident in it, i think haneul’s growing into his more mature self well and it’ll actually help him in the long run as he starts his journey in the idol industry !

kang jina you know what ? i think jina would be a really good leader in her group, if she were to debut as an idol ! i think she has really good communication skills and seems to just vibe with everyone around her ? which is important, as a leader ! but i also feel like she could lighten the mood and kay down the rules depending on which is needed ? that’s just how i feel ! i think she’d do well <3

seo geonwoo first of his theme is so aesthetically pleasing wow ?? anywho ! i do really enjoy geonwoo and honestly need to pay him more attention ! i honestly respect the fact that he knows his own power, and isn’t afraid to be confident in himself ? he just seems v sure of how he wants to live his life which makes him seem v stable, and def in the right direction ! i think he most often knows whats best for himself, and that’s a really valuable skill to have !

ok miyoung first off i DEFININTELY whole-heartedly ship miyoung and hunji, i do !! 😌 but yes miyoung def has romcom protagonist vibes, and i mean that in the best way possible ?? like she’s got quite a lot of things going on for her simultaneously, all while trying to discover things about herself too ?? i empathize with the level of chaos in her life but i think she’s handling it all very well and it’s exciting to read about !

son nabi nabi my ANGEL. i didn’t even know nabi too well prior to us plotting but now i’m so glad that i do !! she has the kindest heart and is willing to go out of her way, even for people she isn’t that close to, just out of the good of her heart ? and i think that’s so powerful ! she’s so baby and i vow to protect her from all the horrors of the entertainment industry because she’s a prime example of light amongst darkness !

ahn jaehwa you knowww jaehwa’s my girl 😚 i just love her adventurous spirit, and how she definitely is filled with more mischief than she may show on first impression ? i think she can use that to her advantage, and it will translate really well as charisma !! her and max’s first interaction showed me just how much of a daredevil she can be and i love it ! psa, we need to plot again !

lee yohan first of yushina nd yohan’s broken friendship is some .... tea 🍵 i’m intrigued ... really i am !! i kinda wanna give him a massage chair for his birthday because i feel like there really is a lot of internal conflict going on in his head ? def hoping he achieves the dream od getting famous before he’s forced to enlist and drop his dreams, and in return for my support i am expecting free starbucks coffee on him, lol !!

bae nathan i honestly didn’t even realize just how iconic nathan is until we started plotting ? him and max share a lot of similarities, which i love, but beyond that he just is such a real dude who kinda just seems ... ok with being not perfect ? and i enjoy that ! he’s accepting the fact that he makes mistakes and knows that that’s ok. i feel like in the future he’d have a fire podcast ?? like i just feel like it’d be so real and entertaining !

han allie first of all, happy ( belated ? ) birthday to allie !!! second of all, producers in general are always just so interesting to me ? i feel like even though she’s still finding it, allie’s rather focused on creating a sound for herself and making it different ? def has the drive to make her dreams a reality, and i know she’ll do well ! allie, fighting !

kim junghwan i think junghwan has a heart of gold ! he’s good at working with others and def would have nice personality to just sit and talk about life with ! i think he also has a lot of hobbies and interests that are v cute and soft boi, so he’s definitely gonna attract the soft stans !! he’s another person i feel would make great leader material some day. also ship him and jinah all the way 😉

kim alex first off i LOVE luna she is my pride and joy .... i feel v embarrased i think we were supposed to thread and i forgot ! but that beside the point !! i feel like he does have crazy duality ?? at some points it’s like “wow, nice man, pet parent of the year” and other times it’s like “wow this man is wilding did he just say that ??” but ... the way i love both !! it’s so interesting seeing his conflicts and how he deals with other people, but maybe that’s the messy mun in me 🙊

ahn jaesun jaesun !! a king. first off i said it to danbi’s mun before but i am just putting it out there i love him & danbi together i do, i ship it !!! secondly i think, maybe because he’s been around for a quite awhile, but you ( the mun ) seem to have a very good grasp on his character ? i think he’s had really significant but gradual development, sort of coming out of his shell and expanding the things he’s willing to take on ! and i love that for him.

yoon shinha let me repeat that minjun and shinha - i ship it !!! i don’t even know hwo to describe it but i just love the energy shinha exudes !! it’s fun, playful, and full of energy, and i think that’ll transfer really well on stage !! he’s the type of guy who’s just down for whatever and i feel like he could befriend anybody if he really wanted to ! i like that about him and think he’ll have no problem getting along w whoever he works with in the future !

kyo miyeon my queen .... oh how i love her ! 😣❤ i think miyeon’s got a cold exterior with a soft interior ?? like she’s sososo composed and a little cold on the outside, but in reality she’s just over here loving animals and the simple things in life ? i think once she debuts she’s going to have fans have v passionate debates about whether they like her cool or soft side more since they’re both so prominent and so good !!

løvehjerte emil first off emil being from denmark and his name immediately stood out to me when he was accepted, and to me makes him v unique ? also doyoung rights ;) i like how well he seems to adapt to the situations presented to him, even if they’re new and unfamiliar to him ! i think he has his ability to keep his cool, but is still learning a lot from being a trainee and proving he can definitely grow beyond what he’s already accomplished !

jung miso miso is the baddest b no one can change mt mind oijoijoijo !!!!! but no for real i always have admired miso even if i haven’t got to interact w her on my muses too much ? at first i def got vibes of the popular girl everyone wants to be just like ? but i’ve realized she’s a loot more ! she has ( shrek vc ) layers, and i think it’s good to see someone who has a lot of things people would see as ideal, but without being unobtainable !

nam yunho yunho intrigues me so much !! i’m sad max hasn’t gotten to interact with him yet lol !! i feel like in this i keep comparing muses to character types but - just take a journey with me ok soijioiofoijfio !! i so see yunho as one of those guys in the movies about small town who’s family has has a business there for years and he’s the chill guy who shows the main character around town ? AND THAT’S A GOOD THING LMAO ! i feel like he’s just immensly chill and always is just vibing and down for a good time ! <3

jo jiwoo i think jiwoo is so exceptionally cute !! but don’t underestimate her because to me she also does have a very fiery spirit ?? and i love it !! def would have the potential to be a maknae on top and i am here for it !! but since she wants to be an actor i def see her even stealing the hearts of the staff ?? the best example of a puppy in real life i’ve ever seen !

na sera first of all being a twin is automatically cool so there’s that ?? but also !! i like how hard she’s fighting to prove her own, individual self worth ! i’m definitely excited to see how she’ll find her “thing” that really riles her up and makes her feel passionate ? and that maybe she’ll decide the idol thing is for her and go forward with it as a career !

min soyoun i think soyoun’s definitely go the girl next door charm, she defintiely seems like the type who you could be friends with easily, and i think she’ll maintain that even when she’s more famous ! she gives me free spirit vibes, and i think that even if she doesn’t know how, life will somehow work to make sure she always does well ! she’s defintiely proved her individuality and i think she’ll stand out from most around her !

geum danbi ugh danbi ... the way i’m obsessed with her ! i mentioned this already but her and jaesun ? cute we ship it !! i am a stan, i am ! anyways i think that danbi is so powerful, and i don’t mean that jokingly ! she does hold a very commanding presence for me, and i really respect her resilience in continuing to fight for her debut, even after being discouraged numerous times in the past ! i think that’ll make her debut all the more worth it, as she has taken the time to get even better and improve her skills !

jang taesung taesung ... the way i really am fascinated by him ! i don’t even interact w him on my muses but he’s still so entertaining to me !! he’s so casual and i just enjoy seeing his interactions ? he isn’t afraid to be authentically him, and though he doesn’t really show it in his words all the time he’s got a lot of emotions swirling around there ! he do ... he do be messy sometimes i get it ?? he’s a lil problematic ?? but it entertains me so we will take it !

song ahri ok i don’t want to claim this bc i’m not COMPLETELY sure but do i have permission to ship her and geonwoo .... i saw their thread on the dash and they’re so cute what 😚💖 ( revision : they are together i can say this lol !!! ) anywho onto ahri things ! she just seems like the sweetest person EVER she’s v gentle with her words and actions, and definitely seems like a comforter of sorts ? i think that, whoever she gets close to, would def have her to lean on in hard times ! she’s like

son seolmi first of congrats on seolmi as the new musical actress !! we need more of them >.< but i feel like when seolmi looks back on her training experience she’ll be very proud of herself ! she has made a lot of improvements over her training period, found her passions, and worked to prove herself ! but i think, although she’s working v hard, she’s also doing twice as good at maintaining her friendships and being good to the people around her !

seo minseok minseok a true angel !! i know we haven’t gotten to write together in a while, but seeing his thread w nari we had i saw how kind he was ! he’s loyal to the people he calls friends, open to trying new things, and i think in the future when he gains experience he’ll be a really great mentor to the people who he precedes !

oh max ok first off i feel like i cannot not say this everytime i see him on the dash or a thread with him i’m constantly in a state of confusion about which max it is oijoioiiojaojoi ?? but !! i’m despite their names, they’re actually pretty different ! because unlike max choi, oh max is has a very loving and warm personality, and even though he comes from money you couldn’t really tell by his personality ?

park dohyun i def want him and max to interact together, side note !! because they’re both goofs and, of course, we need as many lgc boys connections as we can ! but anywho, i love dohyun, as i feel muses such as him are v necessary ! he definitely provides comic relief, and even though he doesn’t like to reveal his emotions, that just reveals another component to his emotional depth ! even if he isn’t someone who is vulnerable, i think it is great he does his best to make others happy !!

lee jiho i mean can i pls just adopt jiho as my child ?? he’s so cute oijjoijoij !! i think all though he’s ambitious and knows what he wants in life, he’s also realistic with himself and knows what he can expect and how to work toward a clothes ! it’s a trait not everyone has so i like that he does ! i think he’s also enough of a positive thinker that throughout any troubles he may have, he’ll get through it with a nice mindset !

lee hanbyul i think that once debuted officially officially, hanbyul will definitely grow in popularity almost immediately ! she’s already done well at gaining the hearts of fans even when she was a trainee, and with so many friends and opportunities under her belt she’ll get big in no time ! i think she’ll definitely be well known and that she’ll bring multiple fandoms together because it’s just hard not to like her !

jung jihye i love jihye !! she’s so raw and rolling with all the punches life has given her ? even after a rocky start to her career, she’s ready to give it a second chance, and although she went through a lot of bullying discovered a newfound love for acting ! i think that her dedication to being happy will show in her passion for whatever she acts in in the future, and i’m excited to see how the public perceives her !

tsai sunisa isa is the ultimate chill dude haha !! i think that he’s very calm and level-headed, while not coming off as careless ? although he’s very casual, he clearly does care about the other’s around him, and i think for him that shows in the little details rather than the big things ? i think he’s the type of person who does well at picking up on the energies of others, and noticing small details about them ! v v cool 💖😌

shin yeseo u KNOW me and max are collectively whipped for her oijoijoi !!! no but honestly, from what i’ve viewed of yeseo from an outside perspective, she’s goes beyond the socially required level of thoughtful ? she really does listen to everyone’s perspective and do what she thinks is best for everyone involved and i really like that ! i also like that the simple things are enough to make her very happy, and that she puts her all into the ones she cares for !

kang yonghwa i love how in love yonghwa is in with life, and how bright his spirit is !! he has such a ... sunshine spirit ? that’s the best way i can put it ! he’s just so positive the majority of the time, and i feel he has the ability to see the best traits of others and bring that out of them ! i also love his sense of adventure, and i think he’ll be a favorite for fans in no time ! kang yonghwa, 10 / 10, our best boy !!

kim hyunbin hyunbin reminds me of a cartoon character, in the best way ! he’s definitely very theatrical, and also has a more playful, teasing side to him ? i think that everyone needs a hyunbin in their life because he’s very considerate of the emotions of the people around him, and on top of that has a lot of interests and boosts any social scenario !

choi jinyoung jinyoung ... an angel ! it’s so my fault we don’t but we should plot more ! uwu anywho ! first off, happy belated birthday to him ! i noticed that during our to the max thread, despite being a little overwhelmed by human tsunami max choi, he stayed very polite and was open to trying a new experience out, and for that i really gained respect for him ! i think he’s a v soft boy but i don’t think he’s weak at all, in fact maintaining his kindness for others has shown my just how strong he is !! 😇😇

oh eunhye just like her article says, eunhye has a real knack for entertaining and i think it’s already begun to show ! i think her authenticity easily transfers to the camera, and that it makes people love her all the more ? she has the type of hypnotizing personality that makes people want to get to know her, and i don’t think it’s coincidence that she’s had the opportunities that she’s had already come to her !

oh gitaek congrats on becoming a producer gitaek !! clap clap !! hehee but i think gitaek is very adaptable ! even in environments when he doesn’t want to do anything, he’s going to push through - like dancing, for instance ! also him and hyunbin’s dynamic ?? v interesting. i’m invested on seeing where it goes ! i think gitaek has a lot of potential, much of which he’s already showing, and i think he’ll have no problem discovering himself fully and becoming big !

son alec just gotta say i always mix him and alex up on accident i wanna scream oijooi !! but also while scrolling his page and saw this: “ old people are amazing, is the conclusion he’s come to yet again ” and i just wanna say i love him for that ojojoioij !! but anyways, alec gives me the vibe of a young adult still sort of finding their way, and i really love that ! he enjoys what he does but still has doubts, and i think that little back and forths very important ! i hope he becomes a super famous actor and achieves all his dreams !

son jieun i love how much jieun cares for her friends !! she was bold enough to straight up call taesung out for mistreating allie and tbh ... kinda in love with that energy ?? i think her bravery goes beyond even just this though, as she’s already tried many new things that others may have strayed away from in fear ! her sense of justice and determination is something i admire and honestly i feel like if it wasn’t for her obvious career path she’d be a great lawyer haha !!

nam jueun it’s the way i want to claim that i indeed am one of seojin & jueun’s biggest fans ... i am 😌✌ but listen !! i have to respect jueun for the way that she’s managed to repair a damaged relationship AND work on herself and her career at the same time ? and both are going good ! she’s also got a real edge to her, and i feel like she doesn’t realize just how cool she is ?? we stan !

park seojin now we alr know ... seojin is one of the muses i am most whipped for in legacy i cannot lie i’m sorry !!! listen ,,, i love my tsundere !! he’s had exceptional development, but in really small yet significant ways, and he’s grown so much in the time he’s been here ! in terms of max, he’s definitely starting to take on a more nurturing role, and in term of himself, getting a better idea of who he is as an artist and a person and i think that’s gonna really show when his band debuts ! also think he’ll be a strict yet incredibly respected mentor when the day comes ? anyways i’ll just say i l*ve park seojin and go 😭💔

lee jiae lee jiae, the apple of my eye !! i was astounded how much kindness could be fit into one small body ?? even in situaitons she doesn’t like, she maintains her bright spirit that brings people to her in the first place, and i think that comforts the people around her if they’re having a hard time as well ! but i think she also does have a bit of a chaotic side when panicked and i do love it i do !! do not underestimate lee jiae everyone i am betting all my money on the fact that she can beat some ass !!

hwang sori first of all her theme made me gasp it’s literally so incredibly gorgeous omg ?? but !! the first thing i read was hwang sori is an ugly crier and that made ME ugly cry with laughter LMAOWAOOA !! even though she’s relatively new i’ve already come to love how out of the box and unapologetically her she is ! she has so much to offer, both on and off stage, and i know she’s destined to be a star ! i’m already so invested and excited to see what she does in the future !

lee aaron aaron !! our dad of the year sobs. of course, my favorite thing about aaron is how nurturing he is ! he has no problem taking care of others, and i think that although it’s easy for younger / less experienced trainees to be intimidated by those above them, aaron removes that stigma completely ! truly a gentle soul. my only complaint about aaron is that he’s so selfless that i feel he sometimes forget about himself, so aaron please eat more and take care of your health oijoijoioij !!

lee youngmin the way i love youngmin !! i was so touched by his patience when he helped my baby nari get herself together when it came to learning lines for cram school ! it proved to me that he’s a v caring person, and even if acting was sort of a sore subject for him, he still went through with helping her ! and that brings me to my next point - congrats for joining the actors youngmin !! i admire him for giving something he’s apprehensive about another shot, and i’m so incredibly excited to see how it goes for him !

song yifei ok even though i don’t know yifei too well yet seeing her intro did help me see why i’m going to love her so much !! i appreciate her adaptation to such an unusual environment like korea, and although i’m sure she’s homesick and a little lost she’s already doing her part to adjust to life in korea ! starting so young, i have to admire her work ethic and her strength by not giving up ! i’m excited to see what she can offer us all !

hwang minsik ok so !! even though minsik is quite the introvert, i think it’s v cool that he has worked past that, and although it may have been uncomfortable, got more comfortable performing in front of others ! i think that being in his head for the majority of the time will actually prove to work in his favor, as it’ll be easier to transfer all the emotions he’s feeling into his music when he locks down and pursues his dream of being a producer !

tsuchiya mitsuki from what i’ve seen, mitsuki seems to be very considerate of others, and i like that she celebrates other’s accomplishments outside of just her own ! the entertainment career can be a very risky and sometimes scary one, but i think that she’s doing a great job at rolling with it and putting her all into forming it into a serious career path for herself !

yamashita ichika i think she put it best - she’s new to korea, but not this world !! i love love LOVE how sure of herself ichika is, and though it may come off as blunt, maybe y’all aren’t just ready to accept the truth she’s spilling ... 👀 lMAO no but for real !! she’s a woman who knows what she wants and i never will be mad at that ! you can never say that ichika doesn’t keep it real and i think that’s something we need to learn from her !

hwang subin i think subin is incredibly self-aware, which really is such a super important trait to have ?? he’s had a lot of conflicts over his training period, but he’s overcame them, and to me he holds a lot of grace even in those scenarios he has this sort of ... calmness to him ? idk maybe that’s subjective but that’s how i feel ! i think in the end he’s going to turn the pain into power, and he’ll be one of the people really idolized for their resilience !

kim minjee i feel like along her path to fame, she’s learning all sorts of new things about herself in the industry, and that feeling of self-discovery is awesome ! i think she’s a really good example of the changes people go through throughout their path toward stardom ! i think she does her best to embrace both the highs and lows life brings her, which i think is preparing her to be a really steady person when it comes to being famous !

im hyunjin my baby !! the way i love him beyond measure !! he gets along with max so well and i love how well they balance off each other’s energy ! he’s got a boyish charm that helps me remember that yes, a lot of the trainees are still kids at heart, and that reminder is v refreshing ! though a lot has been thrown on him with this trimester, he’s been a good sport, and i think he’s such an accurate representation of someone who’s growing up in the spotlight ! i think it’s enough for me to excuse him mixing up the maxs. 😚😌

okamoto akira what a wonderful soul ugh !! he really did impact nari’s heart with his unconditional kindness. i think he’s grown even in his time in the rp alone ? he’s so kind to others, and i love how he holds interest in other people and their stories ! even though he’s still getting adjusted to life in korea, i think he’s doing a great job at getting his name out there while making a good impression of himself. but like i said about aaron pls, akira, take care of yourself more !! you deserve the best, heart heart !!

jeon haeun haeun has such an intense drive when it comes to her love for dance and performing, and i hope she never loses that ! it’s the most important thing, after all ! she’s got such a spunky personality, which will work in her favor as it will keep eyes on her even after she’s off the stage ! she’s a baby, being so young, but already has proved herself to have a worthy place in legacy, and i think she’s even got the capability to teach the older trainees a thing or two, haah !

park viggo i definitely respect viggo, because of the insecurities that have developed from his biological parents putting him up for adoption, he’s shone so brightly already at such a young age ! and i just read his solo w / his encounter with his biological father and - literal chills ?? but .... phew ! i’m so impressed by how he’s had so many horrible experience influence his life, but not let it overtake him ? he’s so strong and if he can handle what life has already thrown at him, i know he’ll have nothing but good to look forward to from now on !

techaapaikhun kit i don’t think i’ve had the chance to tell you yet .... but god i LOVE kit oijoioi !! he’s such a loveable ball of fluff ! he has a very big heart, and i feel like even when he doesn’t know exactly what to do or what’s going on he’s still very much 😊💖✨ ?? you would never think he’s a foreigner because he just seems in high spirits ! also him and daehyung’s interactions ? 10 / 10 in terms of entertainment, definitely deserves a read !

ahn yein i love the short queen energy this woman exudes !! her duality is already quickly becoming my favorite thing about her ?? she’s so this and this ! i truly cannot wait to see how she’ll let her musical style influence the type of music she produces, and i think she’s a producer full of energy who has the potential for being famous for her music and her own personality !

seo yumi though yumi did go through a lot of hardship with her first debut, i really respect her for fighting to prove she deserves a spot in a group for a second time, even if the first time wasn’t even her fault ! i think because of it, even if her light’s dimmed a little, her enhanced discipline will work in her favor, as well as her prior experience, and potentially give her a step up among others ! which, hopefully, will make the hardships she went through not to be in vein !

han insoo insoo’s gone through quite a bit, and though i’d imagine that to be incredibly tough on him, he hasn’t lost his shine ! he still has a brightness to him when interacting around the people he loves, and i think that’s what it takes to be in a band ! i wish nothing but the best for him, because honestly, i think he’s just trying to get by and have a good time, and i really have to respect it !

choi jongsuk okay so from what i see jongsuk is a tad manipulative in the way he interacts with people ... and yet ... i stan ? obviously this isn’t a very good trait, but it is entertaining, especially for a messy mun like me haha !! i think, if he wants to, he can actually use his particularly good social skills to his advantage, and become a charmer among his fans !

choi daehyun omg prince daehyun rise !!! i always love the spoiled rich boy types, because to me, they have the most room for growth ! if i’m being honest with you as ... awful as he might be i think he’s one of those trainees who would 100% give everyone a run for their money ? because if he doesn’t have anything ( beside money ofc ) he has confidence, and well .... confidence is a dangerous thing !! i’m really really anticipating seeing how he’ll get along with the other trainees, and his journey in legacy !!

chwe hunji phew .... my adoptive son !! i admit i am slightly biased to hunji i am i am what about it !!! 😌💖 i gush about him all the time so i’ll keep it ( relatively ) short - i don’t think hunji realizes, but given the whirlwind of events that’s happened in less than a year, he’s doing a fantastic job of both grieving and growing !! he’s been able to look out for those who need him most even in his darkest times, put up with max’s shenanigans even amongst trying to decipher his feelings for him, and adapted to a ever-changing climate that comes with being a trainee in his hardest year ! not to mention how much he’s grown since his arrival !! his development ?? chef’s kiss !

kang dongwon first of all already massive respect to dongwon for doing school and training at the same time ?? that’s already difficult in itself ! but i think he’s taken a lot of risks despite not necessarily wanting to, like expanding outside of activities he’d expected that he would do ! it’s good for him to dip his toe into numerous places, and he’ll be less thrown off if he’s asked to do something unexpected in the future. also him & his relationship w his siblings is the best haha !!

park sarang first off seojin and sarang together are such a cool duo !! the concept of siblings in the industry is honestly so cool ?? but anywho ! but i soso admire sarang !! even though she was initially was following her brother’s dream, it’s gradually morphed into her own, and she really has developed an individual name for herself, which shows her passion and determinism ! i also love how they have a healthy relationship, even with normal sibling fights, without getting into super super competitive territory ?? that just shows her capability to love & that’s great !

kim jinseo first off !! his familial relationship w shinha ? we love to see it ! cutest cousins on the block ! but what i admire about jinseo is how stable he is ! i think he can help people and handle his own problems without getting too stressed, he’s a good problem solver and i think he can calm down and figure out the best way to approach a situation ? also once again him & tee ? cute, we ship it 😊

kim ara first off, friend of the year award goes to ara for helping hanbyul through her breakup and working around processing her emotions ! and also that she’s pretty mature in handling her own breakup w / nathan ! that brings me to the point that i feel ara is a thoughtful person, who definitely sees the good even in bad scenarios and tries to think of the positives that come out of her life, even if it can be difficult to do so !

jin eunji now we know that’s my queen !!!!! i honestly love seeing eunji’s development, and she’s much more of a deep character than she shows on the outside ?? and there’s even more left for others to discover about her ! she’s trying to work through her shit but I like her because she’s the realest depiction of someone who’s growing - because it’s not particularly nice or cute ?? it’s rough but it’s real, she’s struggling to grow and move through her emotions but she’s growing nonetheless and i love that for her !!!

park seon seon is def the type of girl who is just sort of taking it day by day, and i respect it so much !! she has a lot to discover of herself and what she wants to do, but quite honestly i like that about her !! i think that she’s still young and def doesn’t need to stress about it, and i like that she’s just sort of flowing in whichever direction that life wants to take her ! i can only imagine how far she’ll go when she discovers her true potential !

lim sanghyun i feel like sanghyun really is prepared for any situation that’s thrown at him, even if he feels like he can’t do it !! i mean, since birth he’s had tons of bad cards thrown at him, and yet he always manages to turn them into something good ? although it may seem like he doesn’t have good fortune, to me, it seems he has the opposite, because he always finds a way out the trenches !! i think sanghyun’s legacy’s phoenix !

choi daehyung omg daehyung has been a favorite of mine since he came !! i love peeking at the many relationships he has bc they’re tbh so interesting !! he's honestly fit to be a main character in a show ? and i think, despite what daehyung thinks, he’s grown a lot in the time he’s been here ! to me, he’s more aware of his emotions, and more reflective of the choices he makes ! sure he’s got some things to work on but let’s be real .... don’t we all ?

lau mike mike is such a breath of fresh air !! def a roll with the punches kind of guy - reminds me of those popular kids where it’s just like ... dang, things always seem to be go well for them ?? i’m jealous ?? but i think more of that has to do with mike rather than him just having good luck ! he does good at adapting & working hard, from moving to korea, to changing careers, to now training ! he seems to excel and everything he does and i have no doubt that will help him out in the long run !

li zimeng meng is so pretty !! but she’s also SO much more !! this whole thing of her feeling average, and like she didn’t really stand out in comparison to the other trainees .... it’s so real !! and honestly, so good for her ! even though she doesn’t feel special always, i KNOW she is, but i think it’s also great she has this good foundation ? because rather than being good at only 1 thing and realizing in the long run she hates it, zimeng has the potential to be super well-versed and i think she’ll be more aware of what she needs to work on to improve !

tsai king truly our king ... and i don’t mean that ironically !! i looove king’s development, i truly love to see it !! though he’s still got his pride, i think he’s transformed his confidence from blind cockiness to a reason for him to want to work hard and succeed ?? king definitely had things to work on, but he has worked on them, and i think he’s truly proved his place in legacy in the long time he’s been here !! also thoroughly impressed w how much he’s done !

bae doha i think that if I had to describe doha, it would be “ proceed with caution ” !! he’s a cautious person, i feel, who wants the balance between having a good life and keeping himself grounded ? which is a really good type of personality, and I think it would make him a leader for those around him ! he’s also very observant, and i think that will make him much more meticulous of a person as an actor !

song shaun first of all i gotta still thank shaun for doing tiktok dances with max back in the day !!!! that was iconic and i will never forget it lol !! and i'm so glad he’s back. anyways, i think shaun is definitely the type of person that’ll stay true to himself even after becoming famous, he seems v carefree, but also w/o not losing that ambition to work hard ??

pongsak arinya arin is so freaking adorable !!! i think she’s like a puppy and I love it !! she’s so curious about the way around her, i think she just loves what life has to offer her and in turn life loves her ?? she has such a playful and optimistic light about her and to me, it’s impossible not to want to be her friend !! her fans will easily love her <33

jeon haru to me, haru seems like a team player !! he listens to the input of other’s, and i think before rushing to do what he wants to do, it’s in his spirit to think of how his actions affect other people ! and i think that’s shown in how he’s babysitting on the show, even though he’s a little panicked ! i also think he’s a good self-soother, he’s good at helping calm himself down and make himself feel better, and to me that’s so great !!

liu jiao I think she’s doing a great job at making her reality one she enjoys ! she’s struggling to find the differences between her dreams and her moms, what she wants and what she doesn’t ! and still, i believe that she’s doing well and spreading love to those around her despite ! i hope she finds full inner peace and that she can live a life of happiness ( and a little wrecklessness tbh ) without any worries !!

#this took SO LONG my arm hurts iojooijoi !!#anyway ... hope u all enjoy !! <33 #ily all sm !!! <33 #( as told by jada :: ooc. )#( this is our page :: bookmark. )#this is queued bc i'm not home but i'll be on later uwu !

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emeraldwaves · 4 years

Text

Title: What We Lack Part 21 Pairing: Kacchako, Deku/Melissa, Todomomo Rating: T Word Count: 4,381 Read on Ao3 Summary:

Quirkless.

They’re the last people anyone expects to have a child without a quirk.

Neither of them can fully wrap their heads around it, but Ochako knows Katsuki is struggling far more than her.

Thank you to @amaisenshi for reading this over and letting me freak out always. I KNOW IT’S BEEN MONTHS BUT IM BACK XD

Covering her face, Momo peaked between her fingertips, barely able to watch her two sons. Arata wasn't holding back at all, not that she expected either of them to, but Arata looked especially enraged.

He swung at his brother and Yuuta fell backwards, landing on his back out of the ring.

"Yuuta!" Momo gasped. Standing up, she gripped the railing in front of her, her knuckles turning white as she squeezed the bar.

"He'll be okay," Shouto said, standing with her. He gently planed his hand on her shoulder.

"I-I have to go to him!" she stammered, looking between the field and Shouto.

Shouto gripped at her shoulders. "No, Momo. I doubt Yuuta will feel comfortable if his parents show up back there. We can visit him after. They have staff to take care of him."

"It's okay, Momo-chan," Ochako said next to her. The woman took her hand and squeezed it gently. "They'll all be okay."

With a sigh, she buried her face in her hands. "This is too stressful," she whimpered.

"And Todoroki Arata will be moving on to the next round!" Mirio's voice echoed in the stadium as cheers erupted.

"Good job, Arata," Shouto called out, clapping.

Right. Her other son had won, that was important too. The entire match had been tense, but she didn’t want to ignore her other son’s success. "Congratulations!" she cheered, though her voice was shaky. How could she cheer for Arata when Yuuta was lying on the ground motionless. But, then again, how could she not?

She flopped back down onto the bleacher, next to Ochako. "You should be so happy you only have one out there."

Ochako giggled softly, stroking over Momo's back. "Momo-chan, it's okay! It's the sports festival. I was really injured during my fight with Katsuki and I ended up being fine."

"Better than fine," Bakugou growled, bumping into her shoulder.

"Yes, better than fine. I'm sure Yuuta is okay."

Momo pulled out her phone, running her finger down the side. "I'll send him a text just to check on him. I know he probably won't answer but, I just... I want him to know..."

"Good thing Twin #1 probably isn't going to be out of the running anytime soon," Bakugou scoffed, gesturing to the screen where Arata walked off of the field.

"Did you just say... Twin #1?" Shouto asked, glaring at Bakugou.

"Katsuki!" Ochako hissed, covering his mouth with her palm. "I'm sorry, Shouto." She rolled her eyes.

"How the hell am I supposed to remember their names?!" He growled, yanking his face away from Ochako's hand.

"It's not hard," Shouto stated bluntly.

"I'm curious how you decided who was one and two," Deku muttered tapping his chin. Melissa frowned, incredulous that her husband decided to join in on the debacle.

"I dunno, that one was more aggressive, I figure he came out first," Bakugou said, shrugging his shoulders.

"Dad!" Sayuri gasped. She groaned and pressed her palm against her forehead, shaking her head back and forth. Apparently that was even too far for even her.

Momo, however, couldn't help but laugh. She was so stressed, the lighthearted conversation actually made her feel better. She pressed her fingers to her lips, trying not to burst out loudly.

"Momo?" Shouto asked, concerned laced in his tone.

"I-I'm sorry. I just didn't expect the conversation to go in this direction," she giggled, snorting. "And for the record, Yuuta is older. Just by a couple minutes."

"Hah!?" Katsuki huffed, folding his arms across his chest. "Whatever, I think you're confused."

"Why would we be confused about our own children?" Shouto scoffed, confused why Bakugou would think they wouldn't know about the birth of their own twins.

"This is the dumbest conversation I've ever witnessed," Sayuri grumbled, glancing to Kazu.

Momo was honestly grateful. "I am proud of Arata." She sighed, looking out as they set up the stadium for the next face off. Arata wouldn't be back out for a few matches, giving him, and Momo, time to recover.

"I know it's possible our sons could face off, but for your sake, I hope Arata doesn't lose," Ochako giggled.

"He won't."

A new voice boomed behind them, a deep voice Momo hadn't heard this close and personal for quite some time. She clenched her fists against her knees. Just as she had begun to calm down...

"E-Endeavor-san!" Deku gasped, bowing his head as the man walked down the bleachers to where they sat.

Shouto stood up immediately. "What are you doing here?" he growled.

"I'm here to watch my grandsons. Though it seems Yuuta is already out of the running. I'm not surprised, given his attitude," Enji stated.

"We did not invite you," Shouto replied, his eyes narrowing at his father.

"I don't need your permission to be here, Shouto," Enji retorted.

"Shouto," Momo whispered, covering his fist with her hand. Why was he here? Why did he feel the need to constantly torture Shouto and their family? Hadn't he done that enough?

"Arata seems to be doing a fantastic job. Training him has paid off," Enji continued, ignoring the anger on his son's face. "Don't you think you should be grateful, Shouto?"

He sucked in a long breath of air. "Every time I think you've changed, you prove otherwise."

"Do I have to remind you that your son came to me-"

"Todoroki Enji!" Momo boomed, standing up. Her voice commanded a presence so strong everyone turned to look at her, their section of the stadium quiet. "I know you don't respect me. You've made that very clear over the years," she continued, not caring if everyone watched or heard what she had to say to this man. "Still, Shouto has spoken to you many times about staying away from our family. I understand that my son came to you, but you will stay away from him."

Enji's eyes narrowed, leaning toward her. "You son came to me," he repeated.

"I don't care what Arata did. He might not understand it right now, but I refuse to let you indulge in training him. Besides," she huffed, "you've said yourself his quirk is more similar to mine than yours. If he wishes to better himself, I will be the one to train him. Not you. If you ever come near either of my sons again, I will not tolerate it."

"Oh you won't?" Enji huffed, staring down at the woman.

"I won't. You spent years forcing Shouto to be what you wanted him to be and neither of us will allow you to do that to our children."

"Momo," Shouto whispered, gently touching her arm. "You don't-"

"No, I do," she hissed. "I refuse to let your father control you, our relationship or our family. He ruined your family, he does not get to ruin ours."

Everyone stared. People who didn't know them stared. People who did know them stared even harder.

Enji was silent, his eyes not unlocking with Momo's, the woman not backing down.

Pulling in a long breath, Enji sighed. "I won't stop Arata if he comes to me again."

With a final glare, Momo let out a huff before speaking. "You won't have to. He won't be coming near you anytime soon. I will make certain of that."

"Hmm," Enji hummed, still glaring after a brief bout of silence.

The two stared at each other intently for another few seconds, but the moment seemed to go on for eternity. Eventually Enji turned and walked away. Whether he chose to watch from elsewhere, no one knew, but the former flame hero had vacated the area for the time being.

"There," Momo said, smoothing out her skirt. She took a seat back on the bleacher. "I need to cheer for Arata."

Everyone stayed standing, staring at her.

"What?" she asked, glancing between her friends.

"That... was incredible, my love," Shouto said, falling to his seat with an exhale, as though he was finally letting out a breath he’d held in for years.

"I couldn't stand it any longer," she whispered, gently stroking her fingers over Shouto's cheek. "I couldn't bear to see him hurt you or our family any longer."

"I doubt that will keep him away forever..." Shouto muttered. "But it's a start..."

The second Yuuta lost, Shouhei knew he was going to have to fight Arata. There were plenty of matches left, but something about the whole situation didn’t sit right with him.

Arata had been, for lack of a better phrase, a total ass lately and it had been bothering Yuuta which meant it bothered Shouhei. There was no way he was going to let his boyfriend suffer quietly like that, not when Arata wasn't explaining why he was acting the way he was.

Shouhei pursed his lips, watching the replay of his boyfriend falling to the ground. It wasn't very pleasant to watch and he kept his hands shoved into his pockets. Honestly, he was itching to fight again and he had one match left before he qualified for the finals.

The stadium cheered loudly when Arata won his second match, giving him a guaranteed spot in the finals. Shouhei saw him walking down the steps obviously heading to wait for the final match.

He glared as he walked by, the red in his hair glistening against the ceiling. Shouhei clicked his tongue. "I don't know what your damn problem is lately, Arata, but we're going to settle it out there."

Arata stopped, his turquoise eyes flicking in Shouhei's direction. "Are we Shouhei? You have to win this match first."

"I will," he sneered. "If it means I get to kick your ass, I will win."

"We'll see about that," he muttered, continuing on his way.

Shouhei rolled his eyes and made his way to the stadium. Ultimately, he would deal with Arata later, even if they didn't necessarily face off here.

His second match was easier than his first, defeating his classmate with a water quirk fairly quickly. He had become a master of dodging while he was making himself float and thankfully, he didn't get as nauseous as his mother did.

"It's been decided! Our final face off will be between Bakugou Shouhei and Todoroki Arata!" Mirio's voice boomed throughout the stadium. "It's reminiscent of their fathers facing off in the final battle of their freshman year, isn't it Tamaki!?"

"Mm." Tamaki's hum was barely heard, but Mirio didn't push for anything more from his partner.

Shouhei saw the board light up, pushing his and Arata's pictures to the top. Admittedly, he was happy to be facing off with Arata. He knew, as weak as it was, if it was Yuuta, he would've struggled. In general he was happy he had avoided that potential fight altogether.

Pursing his lips, he made his way out of the stadium, everyone cheering as he left. He only had a little time before the final match and he would use it to recover.

The first thing he did was check his phone, realizing his mother had texted him many times. She congratulated him, then she asked if Yuuta was okay, then another congratulations and finally she wished him luck.

[Text: Mom]: Thanks, I'm gonna kick Arata's ass!

[Text from: Mom] We're rooting for you! ;)

He sighed, leaning his head against his locker. He had expected this. He had challenged Arata with his words and yet... he could only imagine how upset Yuuta would be to see his brother and his boyfriend fighting.

Shutting his locker, he made his way out of the room and twisted his lips. He wasn't supposed to go to the infirmary if he didn't need help, but... he wanted to see Yuuta just one time before stepping out against Arata.

Making his way down the hall, he peeked into the room. Yuuta was laying down, staring out the window.

"Hey," Shouhei called softly.

Immediately, Yuuta turned around, a smile pulling across his lips when he realized who was visiting him. "Shou!" he said, and quickly covered his mouth. "You're not supposed to be here."

"I know, I know, but I just needed to see you before the last match. I'm... going up against your brother," he said, stepping closer to his bed.

"Yeah, I saw," he said with a sigh.

"Are you doing okay?" Shouhei asked, looking Yuuta up and down.

"Yeah," he said. "Just a few bruises, nothing major." Shouhei could tell Yuuta wasn't hurt, but he still looked frustrated. His fists curled around the blanket, his knuckles white. "I know this is... a lot to ask of you, Shou, but please defeat my brother. I think maybe he needs to lose or... I don't know..." Yuuta stammered. His chest heaved as he desperately tried to explain himself.

"Hey, hey, Yuu..." Shouhei said, reaching forward to take his hand. "Whatever is going on with Arata... we're gonna figure it out. And... I'm gonna kick his ass." He smirked, leaning in towards Yuuta. "I just... need one thing."

"Yeah?" Yuuta asked, blinking. "What's that?"

"A good luck kiss," he whispered.

Yuuta gasped and glanced around the room, as if they'd already been caught. "H-Here?!"

"It'll be quick, I promise," he smiled and leaned in, brushing their lips together. He cupped his cheek, taking in his boyfriends perfect lips, kissing him softly. He could've stayed there forever, kissing him, enjoying his lips. "There," he said, pulling back. He loved how red and flustered Yuuta's face was.

"S-Shou..."

"That was all I needed. There's no way I can lose now," he smirked.

Yuuta swallowed, finally catching his breath after the soft moment. "Shou, just... be careful. And don't kill Arata okay?"

Shouhei snorted. "Look, I'm not going to go easy on him, but just because Arata's been a dumbass lately doesn't mean I'm going to murder him. I promise okay?"

Nodding, Yuuta leaned back in the bed. "I know you two won't actually kill each other, it's just going to be difficult to watch."

"You don't have to," Shouhei said, trying to hide his reluctance. Something about the idea of Yuuta watching him thrilled him, he wanted to make him proud.

"No... I wanna support you both. I-I mean no matter who wins... I get to be happy!" he said, forcing a smile.

"Yeah," Shouhei nodded, squeezing his hand before moving away from the bed. "Don't worry, it's not like the school would let us take things too far." Or so he wanted to think.

Yuuta nodded again. "I know Shou. Besides I trust you, and I even trust Arata, despite how stupid he's been."

"Don't worry. I'll knock him down a few pegs," he said, giving Yuuta a thumbs up.

He waved, a smile quirked on the corner of his mouth.

Shouhei backed away from the room and intercom buzzed. "Just five minutes until the final match."

He swallowed, rubbing his hands together as he began to pace in the hallway. He wondered how his dad felt right now, when he was about to face off against Todoroki. Shouhei could only imagine how loud and angry his father must have been. Still, in the end, just like always, his father came out on top.

Shouhei had no idea if he could match that level of energy. His parents were always telling him to be who he was, to fight in a way that worked for him, and while he knew he could do that, he sometimes wished he had his father's confidence. Though, even Sayuri, who often had their father's temper, didn't seem to share his self-assurance.

He made his way to the entrance, knowing in just a few minutes they were going to call his name. Arata was on the other side of the stadium, and Shouhei wondered how confident Arata was. He'd seemed cocky during his fight with Yuuta and his other opponent but it wouldn't do him well to underestimate Shouhei, though presumably he knew that.

It seemed Arata had gotten stronger, but Shouhei was more than ready to take him on. In just a few short months, U.A. had already helped him better his quirk.

"Introducing the final two of this year's U.A. sports festival...Todoroki Arata and... Bakugou Shouhei!" The stadium erupted with applause.

Pursing his lips, Shouhei took a step forward. He didn't want to rush in to this, especially after all the matches they had earlier. He prayed Arata's strength would be down, but knowing the unruly twin, he was probably ready to take on this match full force. He'd probably been waiting to fight Shouhei from the beginning.

Shouhei didn't care about Arata's problems, he was going to win this for the sake of Yuuta and Sayuri. He had promised her.

Arata was walking up to the arena, the crowd going wild. It was so odd, looking at Arata's face which looked so similar to Yuuta's, and yet... Shouhei could see all the differences. Arata's eyes were sharper, angrier in this case. In general, his features seemed harsher than Yuuta's soft ones. Or maybe Shouhei was just projecting, given Arata's attitude as of late.

"Both Todoroki Arata and Bakugou Shouhei are legacies here at U.A and they're both the top of their respective classes!" Mirio announced. "We're certainly in for something exciting here!"

Scoffing, Arata planted his feet, pulling a molten spear from his chest.

Shouhei smirked. "Wasting no time I see." He pressed his hands together and touched his body, pushing off of the ground. With his other opponents, he'd rushed in, getting the upper hand by floating them and taking control of their body. He knew that wouldn't work on Arata, not after all the times he had pulled that trick on him as a kid.

Plus, the idea of teasing him a little sounded fun. Arata needed to stop being so damn serious.

He glanced down at him, floating far enough above to be out of reach. "I'm not here to fool around Shouhei," he hissed.

"Oh I know that, you've made that very clear over the past few weeks. Who shoved one of those lava sticks up your ass?" He snorted, gesturing to the burning pole he held in front of him.

"You and Yuuta will never understand. You're too far up each other's asses to notice or care about anything other than each other," Arata snapped, his eyes narrowing as he stared up at Shouhei.

Shouhei took a moment, looking down at Arata. Was that what this was all about? Was he jealous Shouhei had sort of taken his brother from him? It couldn't only be that though...

"Are you going to keep avoiding me? Is this your brilliant plan to win?"

Arata's voice snapped Shouhei from his thoughts, and he shook his head. "I dunno. I thought it could enjoy the view from up here. This is what you get for being an asshole, Arata."

With a grunt, Arata slammed his spear into the ground, cracks streaming through the field. He pushed himself into the air and yanked another object from his chest. It was a whip, fire coating the long line and Shouhei's eyes widened.

"Shit," he muttered to himself and Arata flicked it forward, wrapping around Shouhei's leg to yank him down to the ground. His back slammed against the floor of the arena and the entire audience let out a long groan. His leg burned but it wasn't like Shouhei wasn't used to the heat. Not with Bakugou Katsuki as his father.

"I told you not to underestimate me, Shou," Arata snapped, and yanked the whip back, pulling Shouhei with him.

"Don't worry," he grunted, brushing his fingers over loose pieces of debris on the ground. He flicked his fingers up and shot the pieces of rock straight towards Arata's chest, knocking him back. He let go of the whip long enough for Shouhei to push off the ground floating up once again. "I would never do that to you."

The crowd cheered when Shouhei got back up, happy their match wasn't almost done. He stretched up, watching Arata pant as he pulled the spear from the ground, now holding both weapons in his hands.

Admittedly, Shouhei hadn't thought much of Arata's improvement, mostly because he hadn't seen it up until now. They didn't train with his class, and though Yuuta had been upset Arata had been training with their grandfather, Shouhei had no idea Arata had improved so much so quickly. He had never been able to manifest more than one weapon and he did it smoothly.

It was time to get serious. Launching himself down, he landed against the ground. "I really don't get what your damn problem is, Arata. You've obviously improved a lot. I don't know why you feel the need to be better than me and your brother."

"Shut up," Arata growled, launching the spear towards Shouhei. He dodged, barely missing the fast projectile. "I am better than you and my brother."

"When did you get so competitive?" Shouhei sighed, his eyes flicking backwards to where the spear lay on the ground. He had to touch it with his bare hands to get it to float and though that would cause a serious burn, it would be worth it to throw Arata off guard.

"I've always been this competitive," he snapped.

"Not really, you always wanted to win, but never to the extent that you hurt your brother," Shouhei hissed.

Arata's eyes widened for a moment and then he frowned. "Well maybe Yuuta needs a little tough love."

"Not from you he doesn't," Shouhei snapped. "He misses you, Arata." If he could get his hands on Arata, he could float him and then pin him to the ground.

"There's... there's no need to miss me. He can talk to me whenever he wants."

Shouhei moved closer, shoving his hands into his pants pockets. If Arata thought he was disarmed... maybe he would lower his own guard. The burning whip dripped fire onto the solid ground, but Arata hadn't made a move to use it.

"You and I both know that's not really true," Shouhei said.

"Well who cares? You can just talk to each other!" He snapped, flicking the whip towards Shouhei.

He ducked, yanking his hands from his pockets as he brushed against debris again.

"That won't work twice-" Arata began to say, but Shouhei flicked his fingers upwards, sending it into the air. This time, Arata looked up and Shouhei dashed forward, slamming his hands against Arata's side.

"I didn't want it to work twice," he grinned.

He flicked his fingers up again, shooting Arata into the air. He clung to the whip and tried to flick it downward, but his limbs flailed in the air. Shouhei jumped up and grabbed Arata, slamming him down to the ground.

"Dammit!" Arata cursed, his body hitting the ground at rapid speed. Shouhei had released the gravity, making Arata feel heavy on the ground and he desperately tried to push himself up.

Instead, he let small fireballs appear in his hands and flung them at Shouhei, one after the other, draining the heat from his body. Shouhei dodged, ducking and zipping around the fire, but Arata was relentless. Even as they shrank in size, he kept throwing them, attempting desperately to hit him. However, his body was weightless and it was easy to dodge, no matter what Arata did. Despite his efforts, Shouhei could tell he was getting tired, from using too much heat and the injuries Shouhei had inflicted by slamming him down.

With a grin, Shouhei flipped behind himself, and quickly pressed his hands to the hot spear. He pulled away with a hiss, shaking his hands out. Flicking his fingers forward he shot the spear towards Arata, placing it right in front of his face, holding him in place. "The hell-"

He touched his fingers over the debris and hovered them above Arata's face, pinning them down against his jacket.

"Looks like you're stuck," Shouhei grinned. "Guess you shouldn't have underestimated me."

"You're such a smug, arrogant, prick," Arata spat. "You always have been. I don't know what my brother sees in you."

"Try looking in a damn mirror," Shouhei snarled. He flicked his fingers to the side, the spear falling forward and Shouhei lunged for Arata, grabbing him by the collar of his shirt. "You've been nothing but trouble ever since we started here. I promised Yuuta I wouldn't fuck you up too bad, but I've wanted nothing more than to punch your face in every time he gets upset that you're being a little shit."

"Yuuta, Yuuta, Yuuta, that’s all you care about! That’s all anyone cares about!" Arata clenched his teeth, wincing in pain. He was shivering, obviously trying to get back body heat. "I want to be the number one hero, that's my legacy as a Todoroki. That's Yuuta's legacy too, but he doesn't seem to give a shit about that. He only cares about following you. That's why he's here, he's making me look bad-"

Swinging his hand, Shouhei's fist connected with Arata's jaw. He loosened his grip and Arata fell to the ground, his lip bleeding as he coughed, his arms trembling against the ground.

"Okay, OKAY!" Mirio's voice boomed. "It's safe to say this match is getting a little personal! Bakugou Shouhei is the winner!"

He thrust his hand into the air and the crowd erupted with a cheer. He won, just like he promised. His parents were going to be so excited. Sayuri was going to be excited too; they were going to celebrate the hell out of this. Still, he couldn't help but glance at Arata who shook against the ground.

Shouhei sighed and unzipped his jacket, walking forward to drape it over Arata's arms. "Yuuta doesn't care about legacy... or being number one. He cares about his brother, and I care about one of my best friends. Just try and remember that's important too, otherwise you're gonna be lonely as hell at the top," Shouhei muttered.

He didn't look back as he walked off the field. Though he won, something about the victory didn't taste as good as he wanted it to.

#kacchako #todomomo #yaoyorozu momo #todoroki shouto #bnha #ocs

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delicioustrashlove · 3 years

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To me : a honest open letter to my self. deep breath and open up and express

What do you know . You went back there again and all though you held on super tight you couldn’t keep him could you? Of course not. You’ve lost your self every-time chasing him and you’ve never been able to catch him.

I thought I wouldn’t survive this one. I thought honestly I was not going to make something of my self . I whole heartedly was ready to give up . What ever happened happened and I could care less it’ll never be as bad as losing you. And I truthfully connived my self that my happiness only lied in your arms.

It took me so long to cry . Once I got back Colorado the reality of my new home, it was such a blur . For a while I pretended you died. To some how help my heart forget you. And thats all I wanted was to forget you. I deleted every picture and every single video .I blocked you on everything I could think of that youd have access to talking to me through . And for what . Just to black out once a week and tell you how much I miss you and that I love you . I drank my self silly . I mean every event every party every outing I had to be there I had to be anywhere but in reality . Because reality meant no you. It meant what once was and will never be again,, reality meant excepting my feelings. And I wanted so badly to be tough and strong. I’ve gotten my heart shattered a million times by you , you’d think I would get easier . It didnt it was worse . I was so fully invested in you that life didnt exist with out you in it . I didnt know what that felt like anymore . I was so wrapped up In you so blind to reality . Loving you meant losing my self . I lost my self 4 times a year for 5 years trying to keep your heart. I broke my own heart letting you back in to my life so many times . I knew better . But the love I had for you was so much stronger . I couldn’t stay away . I also revolved my entire world around you , so when you where gone I felt so literally like the world was ending . I lost my whole life . I realize now thats not healthy . You have to always prioritize your health and well being before anyone . You have to love you before you love anyone. So wed break up id self destruct then Id put all my pieces back together the ones you broke. Id fix my self and I would get back on track I was moving on I was happy then just like that . One phone call at 10pm where you clearly to drunk to remember the conversation id be on a plane. Drop my job my home my family My friends … quite literally everything just to be with you . Just to love you. All I ever did in this world was so unconditionally love you. I thought I could hate you I did for a while . But I dont anymore . You where apart of my journey and it almost killed losing you but it was supposed to happen . It was part of the plan that god has for me. You coming int o my life brought so much love and bond that ill never feel with anyone else . I will never love someone the way I let my self love you. And when the lesson has finally been learned only then I can move forward to the next chapter. And your purpose in my life was love and lots of lessons and lots of growing . You think god doest hear your heart crying you think he gave up on you ya know , but he never did. In the end you’ll see there was such bigger picture. 5 years I spent going back to you and leaving you. Why did I always go back ? Because loved you but I clearly wasn’t seeing what god prepared for me. He wouldn’t believe his lessons or fallow his guidance so he kept bring ing me back to you so I could relearn and remember why I left and well you might be my soulmate your not meant to be in my story forever . Only a couple chapters . And once you’ve served your purpose to my life that god wants me to have experienced and learned I will be able to move forward. I first must let you go . And I finally am starting to. I got so unhealthy and so sad and so stuck and caused so many health problems to my body . So much that was almost to much to prepare. But I made a choice one day . I chose my self , and not you. I chose to love me and not love you anymore. I commented intently to my family and I mean really gave it my all. I learned that no matter what my parents wouldn’t never leave mom behind .and im going to everything in my power to be a good girl to them and build our love and our relationship . And I think that was gods purpose all along. You cant keep whats not for you . And I didnt understand that when we parted ways. I accept that now . And I know as I continue to stay on the right path god has such beauty waiting ahead for me… look how much I loved you and all I did for you imagine how much I will love the right man. I did alot. Every time we break up I have to fix my self . But I know now its all apart of the journey . All those trials with you just made me stronger it made me braver it made me wiser and it made men grateful for the good ones. You breaking my heart was one of the best things to happen to me in the end. Because I never would stopped loving you I never would have left you behind. I would have always been your biggest fan and continued to love you till I ended up hating my self. You have the courage to set me free was the kindest thing you ever did for me. At the time I didnt get it but who I am now and what I ve accomplished for my self and how when you try really hard to be better and I mean really hard things kind of fall in to place. God smiles and says okay you deserve this you’ve learned you’ve grown . I manaaged to accomplish that goal of being close to my family . We are so close and we love trust and respect eachother so much . Our bond is very very strong . I managed to get my self too a doctor , I found out I complete sabotaged my health . And oh ya I have 14 allergies !!!! And some of the effects of those allergies after time has caused a harmful build up to where I was 3 years away form being diabetic , my thyroid completely stopped working . Amplifying my anxiety and my depression . The last month. I was in az i would get sick a lot . Id eat something and get sick . The problem was I was so fuxking drunk all the time I didnt ever thing anything of it. I’ve destroyed my guy and its a blessing that wildly and randomly this doctor asked if she could test me . And we found a lot of issues and also got a lot of answers to a lot of my health issues. Im starting treatment for that . Ill be injecting my self every other day with medicine to help my body repair the damages I have done and it will also help fight allergic reaction and build immunity so this doesnt happen again . I also !!! Am taking my meds again . Different ones but im glad I chose to take this chance on them again . I figured if im going to put my health and happiness first I dotn need to be drinking and If im not drinking a lot fo stuff is going to come to the surface and I don know how well ill be able to handle that reality. I also like I said thought. Was going to kill my self. I was so heartbroken so so so sad. I knew I needed help and I reached out and got. Now im happy and stable and I get out of bed and I have energy and im so present and to active. I work out everyday . I eat healthy and I lost some weight . My highest weigh t was 168 before our florida trip I got down to 147 , when worked for Linx I was 145 then after being with tj again my mental health went hay wire and I lost my self again . Completely lost. And when I got back to co I was 153 pounds …. I would shift from 145 to 147 … then I just stopped worrying about it and started doing something about it. I channeled all my sadness in to exercise . Im sad go work out im bored go work out im happy hey go work out get that good flow !! Your angry you miss him what ever it was I worked out then it became all I could focus on cus I learned to love it so Much . I took on running again I put in the work . Things finally where falling into place . I was getting my self back and this time it was better then ever . Better then ever before . I unlocked this door and its been so beautiful. I one day weighed my self just to see assuming id be 145 I was 137 !!!! Wow !!! A week later I was 135 and today I am 133!!!!! Its so cool and feels so good to not be depressed not feel pretty in my clothes. And iliv Amy self. So much . I hope I start working at hooters soon and continue to have a great life. I finally got approved for unemployment and ally back pay and also and extra 13 weeks after mine runs out. Things are just happening . I wasn’t going to get any hadn’t outs . But I was at the bottom thats for sure and you know who was there ? Not tj not the guy you literally did everything for no not him . My mom and my step dad and my brother . They took me in . And it was hard and uncomfterable , but I just stopped going out stopped drinking as much . And did things for them no matter if they where mad at me or if it was awkward.i committed to being good fo them . And I knew it would take time . But little by little ive managed to accomplish all my goals . When I used to be the queen of quitting. I cant wait to see even more of what god has in store for me. And who I become . My skins cleaning up my body is losing weight I more active im healthy and im very in touch with my desires and my well being . I care and love and respect my self so so much. Its like a huge spiritual awakening. I love being alone . I dont feel like alone deserves me right now to be honest .Its gong to take a lot for me to love again but its okay . Not everyone deserves that form me anyway. I worked so hard to me this . To be who I am right now and I won’t let anyone take that away form me. You cause harm to my heart my well being just by !! If you disappoint me disrespect me or hurt me its done . You lost you dot meet my needs your not benefiting and there’s to many many and women on this planet . Ill never waist my time on the wrong one . Ever again. I respect my self to much to put someone over me! And I stand by that now and forever!!! The new be is bette then ever and its gong to take a hell of a person to change my relationship status . And that cool im honestly not even interested . I dont care to date or hang out or hook up or even have sexual contact with anyone . Im so content with me myself and this beautiful transition im goin through I just want to focus on me and my family and my health. Because this is what its all about. This is what living is. this is life. This is beauty . This is whats important. I feel like im living . And im happy and im only going to get better and better. Thank you god for this life and thank you for giving me the strength to turn the page and start a new chapter on life. I fully trust you and the processs. And that brings me back to “god will never leave you behind” I needed to learn all those things that all may mistakes have taught me . And god has a way of constantly bringing things back Into your life if it has not yet served its purpose or taught you what you needed to learn. I see that now. Positive mind set is very powerful . Loving your self is amazing and living through god is the best thing you can do . I will always you tj and I will always in some way wish there was a me and you forever .but I cant ever betray my self like that again. That door is officially closed. See I thought my life was over when you said our relationship was over. But really it had just begun. Everything happened for a reason exactly how its meant to happen . Losing you meant I could finally find my self. It just lit up the path . God bless <3 no angry im happy and im I accept this and I forgive my self and you . Life is so Beautiful .

Some one very wise once said … -Life is not about how much you hurt its about how much your willing to suffer. ~VP

Im not willing to suffer any longer. Except it feel it and then forgive and move forward.

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twentytwoyearoldchild · 3 years

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The First Post

To be honest, I’m not expecting anybody to read these or actually find them, or even care.

This is for me. Be it for the sake of journaling, therapy, word vomit, whatever.

An opportunity to let go.

I guess I’ll start from the top

Shit’s been weird as fuck; as it has been for a lot of people. It was my last day of uni forever the day we shut down for the first covid quarantine, my apartment lease was up in a few months, and I didn’t have a job anymore. I was fortunate enough to have extended family in the area with whom I could move in with after my lease was up. Fast forward a few months and I’m home again.

I really thought I had overcome a lot of shit I was dealing with when I moved out after high school. I had a routine, it wasn’t always healthy but it got me through. But damn has it hit hard since I’ve been back at home. Don’t get me wrong, I love my parents, they’re good parents; they’ve grown a lot since I’ve been away. But there’s always something that doesn’t change. Or, it’s evolved in a weird way that’s not as bad but still like an “are you kidding me,” type of vibe.

I can’t believe I’m still being so fucking vague, like no matter how hard I try I can’t just say it, fuck I cant even type it.

How do I even streamline everything in my head. I’ve never thought about how I feel cause it makes me mad, and I don’t like being angry. I don’t like how it makes me feel.

Why the fuck I have so many issues coming from a family that wasn’t terrible, just had it’s little quirks, beats me.

My mom, I love her to bits, she works her ass off for us and I am eternally grateful for that. Our relationship hasn’t always been good, it only really improved until after I turned 19. We used to fight a lot. But not in the fist fighting sense. It was mostly me doing things she didn’t want me doing but I did any way so she just yelled at me all the time. She used to hit me and my siblings when we were kids. She never beat us until we turned blue, and it didn’t make her a bad mom when she would tell me to grab her heels instead of a belt.

I have never talked about this memory, thought about this memory, it is one I like to keep locked away. I must have been 8, we had just recently moved the year before. I remember running upstairs, my mom was chasing me, yelling at me. Saying she was gonna beat me until I bled. I remember being cornered, screaming, crying, looking up at her, and that’s all I remember. That’s where the memory ends. My memories don’t pick up again until I was about 11 years old.

I used to hate her for it, but I know now that she was just coping with her anger the only way she knew how, and I don’t blame her for it. It was normal for her, it was normal for us.

Wow I feel like I went off track, but hey there’s your not so tragic backstory, just a kid with a mom who had anger issues sometimes. UGH man I hate talking about this. Cause I know it could have been worse. I think that’s one of the reasons I have never talked about it, wrote about it, or anything, is cause it could have been worse. What point is there in telling someone if it doesn’t change anything. Like why the fuck am I so altered by a childhood that wasn’t even that bad.

Anyway

Because of that we used to fight a lot.

My mom is your typical girly girl, does her nails, and im not gonna lie she is very pretty. She takes good care of herself.

I am very much the opposite. I got into alt-rock at an early age and fell in love with being all angsty. I cut my hair off, wore baggy band tees, black skinny jeans, and topped it off with my huge ass DC sneakers. I pierced my own ears a few times, pierced my friends ears. I tried piercing my LIP when I was 10, the needle only went in half way. That shit still makes me laugh.

Basically, I looked like a little emo boy and I liked it. I liked the way people would avoid looking into my eyes, or would look away quickly, or called me sir. I think I liked it so much only because my mom hated it.

She used to be very... vain? I mean low key still is, but whatever. Right about 10 years old is when I remember my mom making comments about my weight. I did sports in school, but it was never enough to stop my mom from telling me I was too heavy, or that I wasn’t sucking in my stomach enough. There were other things going on at home that I think snowballed it but that’s for another time.

I’ve never called it an eating disorder but I guess that’s what it was. What it is. It wasn’t debilitating, I never got underweight, I looked normal and healthy. It wasn’t as bad as it could have been. I stopped eating, I tried puking, I started binging. Not enough to cause attention, just enough to feel in control because I didn’t know how else to deal with everything going on.

After I moved out, I thought I had moved past it. I really thought I was doing something, and getting buff, that was the goal: get ripped as fuck. I was going to the gym 6 days a week, for an hour or two, lifting weights. But I wasn’t eating. I had no idea I wasn’t eating, I was just busy. Always busy.

I didn’t realize how much it affected me until last year. An acquaintance of mine asked me if I was “ok” because I was looking “really thin”. Never in my Life had I heard those words directed at me, ever. That shook me So Hard.

I don’t want this to be a dunk on my mom, I love her so much, and she’s grown so much as a person and as a mother. I’ve forgiven her. Which is why this shit makes me so mad ‘cause it’s like, “I’ve forgiven her but why can’t I make it stop,”

TLDR;

Okay All of this to say: Im back home

quarantine has definitely fucked up my weight, as it has for many others. but now being back at home with my mom telling me everyday

wow ur getting fat

if u dont exercise youll get fat

I see your double chin you need to loose weight.

like WHY is it fucking me up. why is my parents fighting and ignoring each other again still fucking me up. Why cant i sit down tune that shit out and just fucking work like i need to. Why cant i fucking eat. why is it so hard to just say “i need help but i dont know how”

It’s been a week and I have totally ignored everyone that’s been reaching out to me.

Why do I feel so guilty.

Man, I feel like such a whiny bitch baby.

#tw: depression #tw: disordered eating #tw: childhood trauma

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tossertozier · 4 years

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you mentioned possibly doing a ben or mike writing guide.. would you.. be willing to post a mike one. i'm plotting a fic and im struggling to get my mans down?? also i think abt ur fics weekly bare minimum.

hi there!!! i did my best. i tried to not sound preachy or like a know it all bc y’all know i can barely write. i hope this is helpful in some way!! disclaimer of of course this is all just my opinion & there’s no wrong way to write, you’re the only person who can tell your story!!

[[MORE]]

i think the first really important decision you have to make as Person Writing Mike is his

family & background

-are both of his parents alive?

-if yes, what’s their relationship like?

-if no, who’s his primary caretaker? what’s their relationship like?

-if no, when did they die? did he cope well with it? what’s his relationship with their memory like?

these are really really where you gotta start to write mike imo. or any character! i think one thing stephen king is to be admired for is he doesn’t neglect the parent-child relationship as so many people who write youth do. your parents are the most important people in your life for a long time. i don’t think there’s a wrong or ooc way to answer the above questions tbh. canon has really left a wide open field for you to run amuck in.

(example: i’ve mentioned in the past that my & tfat mike being a small adult is no mistake and intentional. it’s a bit of a throwaway scene, but i mention in on pointe that mike’s parents are coming. it’s intentionally done there too. mike is goofier, more outgoing, more immature in general in that fic in the small bits he’s in & that’s all a response to his familial life. )

culture + friendships

after you answer those questions, important follow up questions are:

-are the losers his first set of friends?

-how much social exposure has he had?

-has he dated? who is he attracted to?

-who influences him? (celebrities, family, culturally)

-what are his cultural interests? what does he do in his free time? how would that impact how he interacts with the rest of the world?

again, no wrong way to answer these. i’ve seen a super broad spectrum of indirect answers to these questions. even thinking about where he might pick up patterns of speech can make him feel much more like a realized character. i’ve noticed some people dip fully into aave to an extent that doesn’t even seem logical in their character’s current situation & it can really seem like a caricature, but i think to write mike without any sense of aave at all is a little ?? too. just be cognizant of it is my only real advice here. it doesn’t so much matter as long as you don’t forget who mike is which next point

humor & personality

-what do you think he would find (shows, comedians, youtube videos) really funny?

-does he have something he quotes often? something he started saying ironically but never stopped?

man i know i’m all there’s no wrong way to write mike !! in this post but i will say real quick that i think mike is funny and i don’t really respect depictions of him where he’s not. i think this is where the movies really just fucked up. book mike drops some of the funniest lines of the book. and honest to god tip is to write out a scene as you feel the urge too, look away for five minutes, look back and give half of richie’s lines away. (or... dialogue.) this sounds like a joke but it was what i did when i first started writing & tfat

i’d always be like “n the funny part goes... to richie.” and thats a fandom inclination too. nooooo. avoid this trap. it doesn’t even make sense. have u ever been in a friend group where only one person... makes jokes? that’d be genuinely so weird. especially bc if you give the joke away to someone else, you can also build on it. amazing things start happening when u start thinking of the characters in flexible patterns. like for example, i almost always give absurdist humor to stan now. wholesome to ben.

mike’s humor is largely situational to me. solid comedic timing & he’s an observant person. sometimes i read back my own writing & have to change the pov bc richies making jokes about things he would never ever notice to make fun of. mike would. mike genuinely sees all. i think he’s just got one of the most analytical brain of the losers. & i think intelligence is subjective and people are smart in different ways but i think it’s foolish to write him as anything other than incredibly intelligent both academically and emotionally. he’s just a natural observer and pattern notice-er. which brings me to my next mike thing:

love & selflessness

i think the biggest part of mike being harder to flesh into a fully realized person is the fandom tendency to make him kind and nothing else. here’s mike. he’s nice. next. bc the book kind of points out his selflessness in his decisions and it makes itself one of his strongest character traits.

especially bc nice seems to trump him having any other emotions. ...no?

i believe in general, but ESPECIALLY in the case of mike, that kindness is a choice. it’s one i genuinely believe he’d make, over & over again. but a choice he makes. he gets annoyed with his friends being annoying like anyone else would. he gets hurt when he feels left out. he feels tired & anxious & hungry and all those other human things. sometimes he might not let it show outwardly, but there’s a difference between that and not giving him feelings at all.

people are selfish. it’s a defense mechanism. it’s to protect us. it’s not a bad thing. we think of how the world impacts ourselves first. we don’t always act upon those thoughts or voice them, but don’t forget to let mike have them. he doesn’t need to be happy for his friends all the time, or rooting for them or supportive. he should have his own things going on.

also. mike’s not a doormat. yes, he stays in derry. but those were life-death consequences for generations of children. it’s really not comparable to almost any decision mike would make in a pennywise free universe. yes, he made a sacrifice in the book but i don’t think he’d just lay himself down in any given universe to whatever fate wants to hand him. but this is where i end this topic bc i’m actually only barely beginning to get to this topic in my own fic!

it’s hard writing the losers young sometimes bc i do feel relationships are naturally a little unbalanced based on basic maturity levels as young people. sometimes friendships just are unbalanced bc of who people are at that time. everyone involved can still be good people in these relationships. it’s about growing together and learning how to be good friends to each other.

for example, in &tfat: certain losers are always checking in with others. others are really wrapped up in their own shit and don’t really notice what bothers the others. it would probably take a chart the size of a textbook to explain how i think this dynamic wholly pans out in full. and yeah, i think it grates on mike a little bit that he is always the checker and never the checkee.

but even when mike snaps, even when he gets upset, i always write it coming out of him with a lot of love. i genuinely think mike, regardless of experience in that fic, has the deepest understanding of love as its own concept and an understand of how exactly it rules his life and and his relationships. mike knows to feel strongly about something he has to care about it. there are lots of things he just doesn’t care about. in the book it’s stated he’s difficult to connect with as an adult. he’s distant. he’s focused on what he wants to focus on. i think mike is actually the most interesting when he becomes a little bit of a disaster man with very little time for what doesn’t interest him.

which last thing, dislikes & disinterests

-what annoys him?

-what makes him genuinely angry?

-what bores him to tears?

i always make jokes that i bring up the nastier parts of the losers bc i love nasty boys but thinking of things people don’t like is as much a part of them as the things they do.

for example, in &tfat, i write richie as making fun of “nerdy” things like anything you could find at comic con. i write bev as not giving a fuck about sports. bill doesn’t care about richie’s music tastes. eddie hates getting condescended to.

bc of the ... kind thing, mike’s one of the harder losers to do this with. i genuinely think mike would listen to any of his friends tell him about anything. & he knows, in return, they can’t say shit when he wants to ramble about history. but dislikes can also be super situational.

again, for example in & tfat: mike doesn’t like when his friends talk about college right now. no one is really being sensitive to him at all. he hates getting blamed for stuff that isn’t his fault, mostly bc it keeps happening.

anyway. i based a lot of my mike (mostly sense of humor and personality) off of a mix of real life friends of mine. it’s a luxury. i know. i’ve been blessed to have friends from literally all walks of life & for me borrowing little habits & quirks & sayings & jokes to slip into my fics and characters is my way of writing one massive love letter to those ive known. i hope i’ve helped you in some way anon. n if not.... don’t be sad i’m hardly one to take writing advice from anyway jandjxjx

overall, as i used to do often, i’d genuinely stop myself and say: is this a person, or a convenience for the plot? and if it was the latter, sigh, and get my backspace key ready.

#mike hanlon

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clownbeep · 5 years

Text

This is gonna be kinda brutal. But I want to put it into writing

Big vent/whats been going on

Hah... I guess this is like my life story or some shit...

Trigger warning ahead.. Depression and a bit of gore/suicide talk so if you are sensitive to that please, for your own sake and mental state you might not want to continue.

For those who dont want to hear a pretty dark vent, I understand.

And those who are just scrolling by feel free to scroll past. I just personally want to get this out.

If you have dealt with emotional neglect/abuse and need to know it isnt in your head this might be the post.

By writing this it feels like hopefully someone else will read this and realise certain things are NOT healthy.

If you are questioning if you are being emotionally neglected/abused (im speaking in a parental sense but even romantically or sexually) im not someone to give you answers, but the fact you are questioning it raises some red flags. In a healthy relationship you dont wonder those things.

Sorry for the long prelude but heres what I wanted to say

Ever since I was young, ive had bad ADHD, manic bipolar/depression, and sensory issues.

I was diagnosed around 13 I believe. My family (I didnt realise it then) always showed pity. Like I was some wild animal that couldnt be tamed and there was nothing they could do. Id do and say stupid attention seeking things just to try and get a shred of empathy.

My family didnt care.

When I was in the hospital for a suicide attempt regaurding pills and my liver had a chance of failing.. None of my family members cried over me. But a family friend. Someone not. Even. Related. Wept over me.

My family didnt care.

I cant say they never cared. They give me food water and luxuries like internet and a phone. For that I am grateful.

But in many other ways they have hurt me faar more than helped.

Once I got out of a short term stay in an inpatient mental facility I desperately needed contact with anyone who would care for me.

I have a younger sister, quite young probably around 7 at the time. She was a close friend of mine for that time. Id hang out with her so often to fill the gap in love it felt my family didnt give. One day I walked into the dining room and overheard my mother and father talking to my little sister. They told her to keep away because I wasnt "stable" because I was "dangerous" and could give her bad Ideas. And with one single action my only friend at the time and way to find happiness was taken away.

My family did not care.

When I stay in bed every day for months on end not knowing which day ill snap and end it all.... I get called lazy.

My family did not care

When I beg for medication to make me a functional human being they brush me off for years on end. Im losing my grip. I can barely remember things that have happened last week because I try so hard to forget everything its my automatic response to everything.

When I cant get to sleep because all of the memories come flooding back and im hit by wave after wave of horrific memories and the feeling if worthlessness... When I cant watch any videos or read posts about families because it brings on unwanted memories and emotions....

Is it me being dramatic then?

When you hear your family openly mocking and laughing about how stupid and dramatic and fake trans people are... How weird and unnatural and mentally insane these people are not knowing they are the very reason grsm and trans suicides are so high...

Am I a liar now? Am I insane?

When I tried to talk to them about my mental health issues. They took my only way of contact and made me feel like it was my own fault.

My family didnt care.

When I was nearly passed out shaking in a bathtub covered in wounds and blood all over... They showed pity, then lectured me for an hour for not telling them or for being impulsive and basically cleaned my wounds and sent me into my room.

My family didnt care.

Yes. I do agree, they cleaned my wounds, the physical side of showing care. However emotionally they were not there.

When my father drinks so heavilly every day he is home from work that he forgets half the things he tells you and can barely function.. They lecture my older sister for having a glass of wine (legal age)

They did not care.

My sister (23) tried for so many years to cling to what little attention she would get by getting good grades and going to college... She realised that it changed nothing about how my family felt toward her.... She snapped.

My family did not care.

She starves herself for a disease she does not have, she uses religion as an exuse to be one of the biggest christian extremists I personally know. Half the days she doesnt eat... Other days she burns book and gets rid of items for being demonic.

My lovely sister used to be kind and quite normal. However she couldnt find comfort in what little live her family gave. Starved for care she turned to religion to un unhealthy degree. Finding any way to keep her mind busy. Now I worry she will end up in the hospital for weighing so little.

My family did not care.

My oldest sister (27) Is married to a continuously cheating husband who she keeps letting back into her life. She was raised with a failing marrige and doesnt seem to see when she should call it quits.

Not to mention her husband has touched someone legally under the age of concent. Did she report him to the authorities? No.

All of these horrific things stemming from bad parenting. Unhealthy relationships and neglect.

Neglect emotionally can cause just as bad things as physical neglect. They are both horrifically dangerous in different ways.

These are the only big things I can remember... Basically age 15 and below are a complete blur to me and I cant remember much of it without thinking for a looong time. Even then I cant remember a lot of it... I feel like ive lost my whole damn childhood. And it hurts more than if they had just hit me or physically harmed me.

Im not underplaying physically harm. But in my personaly opinion I would rather my family have beaten me badly because at least then id have an easier way to prove to people how severe the abuse was. You can see bruises and confirm broken bones... But years of feeling completely useless and being shut off from most of the world other than the internet... It fucks you up in a way I dont think can be healed.

I dont know if I can ever love myself or... Remember things. Its terrifying to think Ill post this and a few weeks later probably not even rememner unless its brought up. Or meeting people and having conversations... And they are just... Gone.

Gone.

I suppose the biggest reason im writing this is well... In the future I dont want to forget in some ways.. I want like to be 100× as awesome knowing itll start as soon as im out of here..

If I dont have anything to compare it too then what is the point?

Ive layed out basically most of what I remember

A large amount of time I look around and nothing registers... Everything is familiar but I cant remember anything for a moment or two.. I feel like my memory is slipping so fast and im terrified.. I cant do anything to stop it and I cant make my mood be stable without the medication my family cant be bothered to get ...

I suppose this is a bit of a vent. I know its kind of everywhere and unorganized..

If im honest.. Tumblr is the only place where people have given me a home I wish I had..

I came out as trans here... Everyone was so damn supportive.. I didnt say anything but I cried hard and the kindness.. It was amazing.. It was such a jarring difference to how I feel when I say anything in real life.

Ive met friends here and ive had some much fun here. If youve stuck around this far thank you so much.. If you didnt I dont blame you.

I just wanted to share what has been flashing in my head these past few days.. It hurts a lot and ive even considered suicide recently..

Im trying hard. As hard as I can.. I have no escape though.

I cannot leave home. I cannot escape. Im not being dramatic.

CANT

LEAVE

And its terrifying because I know without medication or at least being somewhere AWAY from family.... I feel like im going to break soon.

I dont want to do anything stupid.. But some days I cant think straight and do things that harm myself and its not good. Its not okay. Im aware that I need help but I have no idea where to go/turn.. I have no ID or drivers liscence.. I have no transportation to and from a job to get money so I can leave... I live in the middle of nowhere.... I just..

I dont want to lose touch. I dont want to do anything bad.. I want to be functional.. I want to do more than eat and sleep my life away because I have nothing else to do..

Im so damn sick and tired of this all.. And at times I really do feel like there is only one way out.

Its always there and I just feel like one of these days im gonna be pushed over the edge and not be thinking clearly enough to stop it.

Im thinking semi clearly right now which is my im posting this.. Because im afraid and alone.

I have nowhere to go irl I have no friends Irl i just have tumblr and media and thats it. I dont expect anyone to be able to help I just wanted to write this so anyone knows what happens if I leave media..

If I tell my family my issues they will blow me off again for the 11th time or so (not exaggerated)

And if I do something to get sent to the hospital and get the help I need the cycle will continue with them being pissed and me getting sent home in a month or less anly for my family relationships to get worse..

Im spiraling fuether and further and I cant keep up the facade of being fine. I need help. And i have no way to get it. Ive just been suffering for years...

Sitting around and doing nothing but using your phone or drawing or whatever sound fun in theory... But if thats all youve been able to do for years with little to no real life social contact its gonna mess with your head... I dont want to be a shut in... I just

I dont know what to do.

Im sorry for rambling. I will most likely delete this later feeling embarrassed I posted this...

Im just tired..

#trigger warning #triggering #may be triggering #vent #emotional neglect #emotional abuse #suicide #suicide trigger #gore warning #memory problems #ramble #rambles

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headinclouds-universe · 5 years

Photo

Language - be warned.  

Not sure the ending will stay this way, it was supposed to go differently but Im running out of time at the moment to catch my next flight out. I own nothing but the idea, photos are not mine. Will check errors later like always.  

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Oh My God!”, coffee sprayed mostly on the kitchen bench but Sansa could care less right now. Using a tissue nearby she light dabbed at the screen on her phone.

“Fuck, Fuck, Fuck”, she cursed in a harsh whisper, scrunching the tissue and zooming in on the screen.

“Hey, you know I’d love to again but I’m going to need a little more energy sweetling”, hands grabbed her hips to pull her briefly to his chest and she barely felt him kiss her on the back of her neck before he squeezed her hips one more and left her to pour a coffee.

“Oh My God!”, panic set in her voice once again when her second glance really just confirmed her first thought. It was them alright. Well not really their faces but mostly Petyr’s body and of course his firm grab at her ass. Sansa sagged again the cold marble of the kitchen island and felt her heart beating out of her chest, one hand pressed to confirm and try to catch her breath.

“Hey, I’m not saying no…20 minutes tops. Enough to drink some coffee, eat breakfast and then I’ll be right back to eating you. You know I’ve never let you down be…”, Petyr had been still fiddling with the machine, shirtless and only in his briefs went he felt something hit him in the back. Petyr turned to find the tea towel on the floor and raised an eyebrow at Sansa. That was when he got his first look at her face, eyes wide with shock and slight frustration for his fail to notice the huge mess they were about to be in.

“Have you checked the social gossip page after last nights dinner yet?” she asked almost accusingly, like he should have, like whatever the issues was was all his fault already and he wasn’t even sure there was an issue yet.

“I have been rather busy you know, twice last night and early this morning I recall”, Petyr figured some light sarcasm and a reminder of the great sex last night (and this morning!) might sooth any worries she had. Honestly if there was any issues to be had it might have been that bloody dress she wore last night. It had turned more then a few heads, had him trying to keep his hands to himself and it had driven him crazy all night to the point that when they had left to head home he had taken her just outside the penthouse lift, they didn’t even get to his front door.

“Well Mr Baelish you might want to take a look at this because we… a… screwed!”, Sansa held up her phone in the air and he walked over for a closer look to hopefully help him understand what had her panties in a twist.

Well Fuck.

Petyr grabbed the phone out of her hand and examined it closer. Yep. That bloody dress. They had kept a respectable amount of distance in body at the gala but their eye fucking had been free and often all night. They hadn’t talked about going public with their ‘relationship’ but he had though to hint lightly on that subject. He wanted her to move in with him but there was no way that could make that happen without starting to come out, so to speak. He knew her parents were going to be a sore point for her, they would not take this well and Sansa was trying to avoid it all.

Well… that wasn’t going to be a problem anymore.

Sansa had been excited for the Gala and to cheer her spirits of them not being able to walk into the room on his arm and as a couple like she desperately wanted to do, she had kept her new dress hidden from him. Had hinted to him that he would be blown away, she had made it herself. Petyr knew she had talent and really, the girl could wear anything and she would be absolutely stunning.

He had arrived first and had been mingling per obligation at these galas, It was the same thing at these though. He had been in a circle with Oberyn and Elia, Renly and Loras had arrived to and Stannis had come along and they had ben discussing the latest news about the Lannister company scandal that was about to become public, they really were on borrowed time that family. When she had entered the room he had briefly noted Margery and Roslin by her side but them and everything else became so unnecessary. He was pleased to see Sansa had not been lying about that dress. Her hair was out in waves, makeup a little more then normal to suit the gala and he was enjoying the dark red lipstick. The dress was pure white and had a silk like quality and hugged her so so very well, she had really made it just for her. The top had sat rather higher then he thought it might, he figured she might go for plunging neckline and that had been the detail she was referring to when she said he would die when he saw it, she did have great breasts. Though that was not the surprise.

Sansa and the girls had made their way over and after around of air kisses and greetings (Sansa and Petyr had thought it would be weird not to greet each other this way too) Petyr had first been treated to her warm and smooth skin on her back. When she had leant in to say hello and kiss on the cheeks, he had briefly placed his hand on her upper back to reciprocate. He hadn’t been prepared for the skin to skin contact and was disappointed it had been brief. He had a feeling there was more to it. It didn’t take long until behind her, her father had called out from a short distance to come and meet and say hello to a work college. Sansa had excused herself from the group but had given him a knowing look before turning around.

And there was when he had noticed the back of her dress and he hadn’t been the only one.

The dress scooped low and he had the most dick hardening view of her spine, a path his hands, lips and tongue had travelled a many a time. There was no other dress that had complimented her ass either has much as this one did, it was bloody to die for alright. Her dress hugged her firm and toned bottom in an alluring way and Petyr was thinking about all the things he wanted to do to her in that dress. Petyr had always been good at being patient but this was a struggle like no other. Sansa had had the idea to not have sex for a week leading up to the gala just to make it fun and he was glad to see some regret in her eyes and hoped she would never suggest such a thing again.

It would be a long while until they both worked the room well and often enough to indicate with their eyes that they should find a quiet place to themselves. It was always best to wait untill the dance floor was filled and people standing around after all meals had been served. People by then had at least had a few drinks to relax more and pay less attention to details.

They had managed to find a quiet little cover within the hotel, no doors but not many guests would wonder down this far. The knew they would have long but they were both desperate for some time together. Sansa had been keen and pleased with the desire that filled his eyes, he was killing her to though. That man of hers really knew how to wear a suit, he wasn’t afraid of a little pop of colour or a bolder pattern, every article of clothing was made to fit him. Fit him it did.

Sansa had hoped that when she made eye contact and occasionally licked her lips or bit her low lip it was telling him she was just has pleased. His hard eye on her and that little side smirk had let her know he was thinking of only wicked things when it came to her she honestly couldn’t love him anymore then right now. He gave her such confident to were a dress like this and she would forever be grateful to him for that.

Petyr had gone first and after a little walk aways from most of the noise she felt a pair of hands grab her out of nowhere and pull her body against another. Sansa briefly registered that the little spot he had found was exactly private but it would have to do. His back was pressed to the wall and he had grabbed her against him and they both groaned at the feeling. Sansa then felt him firmly grab her ass and push her even further again him, she gasped in surprise and placed her hands against his chest to study her self. The grab he had on her bum was firm and almost primal, it was doing all sorts of things to her inside. Petyr had tried to think of something clever to say when he grabbed her, tried to think of complimenting her on her work of art but he had been staring at the round globes of her ass for the last few hours and all he could think about was touching her, of getting his hands on one cheek at least. There had been a brief moment when he had squeezed past her an other guest to make his way to the bar and had allowed the back of his hand to graze her bum.

He didn’t have to be subtle now though.

He knew the moment she had felt him again her thigh because he felt her body much slightly closer to him even still if that were possible. Her body against his, her ass gripped in his hand he wondered if his driver was going to get a show on the way home.

“I know I should say something else…but all I have been able to think about is grabbing you like this out there so everyone knows you are mine and I am yours”, Petyr’s voice had taken that deep and husky tone when he spoke close to her face, she smelt amazing too.

Sansa felt her heart warm up and burst at that comment, it was so much better then any ‘ I love you’ she had ever hoped for. It was so very him. She felt him graze the side of her face gently with just one finger and then leaned closer still to whisper in that voice of his something so wicked it made her beyond wet.

“Now…taking your fucking panties off right here and I’ll keep them safe in my pocket until we get home”, his grip on her ass was firmer again at those words. Sansa though, had been learning from the very best and whispered back into his ear, “I’m not wearing any”, Sansa could believe she found any kind of strength then to push off him and start to walk away.

“Meet you at the car in 20 minutes, I need you now,” she said with a wink and a smirk of her own and all he could do was bask in her wickedness and think about all the ways he would touch her in the back of the car. His memory had been about to flash back to that when Sansa broke him from the flash back with a hand waving in front of his face and a look at disbelief at the tenting in his briefs.

“Are you kidding me right now! Someone saw us last night, took a photo and splashed in on social media and your hard right now.!” she accused has if he had lost his mind. Some sense and blood returned to his brain and he cleared his throat, “Hey…”, she had slumped even further against the counter and held her head in her hands. He walked over to stand in front of her and placed the phone on the bench beside them while his hands rubbed up and down along her sides. He gentle pushed his head and again hers and waited for her to lift her head and look at him. When she did her eyes were watery and one little lone tear fell down her cheek and he was quick to wipe it and give her a quick kiss to the lips and held her face in his hands.

“Tell me whats worrying you the most and I promise we’ll work it out.” Sansa had tears in her eyes but she had been silent and holding it all in so she could avoid whole ugly cry seen. “I just…I just don’t want my parent to know and certainly not this way”.

Petyr long ago had though their age gap had been a slight source of embarrassment for Sansa in regards to her family but that had not been the case Sansa reassured him. Ned and Cat Stark were terrible picky when it came to the people their children dated. The relationship between Robb and her mother was a frosty one still, though he had been married now for over a year and dated for 6 months before. Sansa had suspected it all happen so fast because of her parents disapproval and Rob’s stubbornness. Robb had wed in secret and announcing it the next day to the family had been devastating to her parents to be kept in the dark. Robb had been the golden child and when he had disappointed them Sansa had felt extra pressure to make sure she pleased them even though she knew she wouldn’t always.

Petyr was everything her parents were going to hate, offensively wealthy and certainly not quiet about it. Petyr was flashy, cocky, smug and incurably sly and smart - everything she adored about him was going to be an extra nail in their coffin, has her father would say.

“While I doubt Ed and Cat Stark have social media, I imagine it won’t be long until one of your siblings or a friend lets them know about this. Your dress gives you away I’m afraid but my identity is still unknown - so we have options”. Sansa looked at him slightly hopeful and he prepared himself for her to choose the less taken path and stay hidden awhile longer.

“You can call them up now, admit to seeing someone but your not yet ready to make introductions, it’s all so new ecetra ecetra…..it buys you a little extra time to get them used to you dating someone. The other option…is to just really come clean. We fly out there today and I can be beside you or waiting in the car…and you just tell them sweetling.”, he took a death breath before he realised there was one other options also. He could even believe that this was going to come out of his mouth, what the fuck was wrong with him. Petyr was selfish but with her, he would absolutely do anything to make her happy. He would not put pressure on her to choose, he would be no better then her parents.

“Or We…we could also end this now between you and me. I know how much your family means to you I truly do and if you feel that by being with me is…I fucking adore you more then anyone or anything ever in my life but I don’t want to make you unhappy down the track if…” , Sansa cut him off with a searing kiss and he returned equally almost to try and take it all back. Sansa in her haste tried to almost climb him and he regained their balance by crushing her against the bench to hold them both up while they reassured each other it wasn’t an option.

Sansa was the first to pull away and catch her breath, resting her forehead again his while they both calmed themselves down. “I know you had good intentions but I know you wouldn’t let me go and I wouldn’t let you”, Sansa reassured and soothed his bare chest with her hands for both their sakes. Sansa knew the choice she had to make.

She groaned and saw that dress was going in her cupboard and not coming out for a very very long time.

#petyr baelish #Petyr x Sansa #ao3feed petyrxsansa #petyr and sansa

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jackandmarksavedme88 · 5 years

Text

Dark Lemonade

@ashphoenix06 @honestlyitsjustkennaswriting @emma-wrote @goldenoceanarps @weirdmixofweirdness

TW: Some violence, also gets a liiiiittle dirty(but the super nsfw parts have been cut out for tumblr sake 😂😂)

Mark.....are we ever going to stop driving?"

"Well. You said isolated. His place is as isolated as i could think of"

Alison studied Mark as he drove, glancing behind them where Amy was driving Alison's car every so often

"And youre sure Dark isnt going to be too...put out?"

Mark chuckled 'That asshole is always put out. Part of his charm you could say"

As he drove he thought of the conversation hed had with the ego the week before

******

"Why here Mark? Why does she need to stay here? I dont even know her"

Mark looked at Darkiplier as his aura slightly crackled around him

"I told you. Her ex has been stalking her, she needs somewhere to stay while her dad is off the ranch. She doesnt need to be alone on that huge place. Amy and i are going out of town. Now get over it. Shes staying"

"So get the police to babysit her. Why should *I* have to" the ego scowled, clearly not giving a shit what would happen to this girl

"Look Dark im not having anything happen to her because you want to be a pretentious ass. Its not like you use all of the five rooms here."

"You and Amy talk as if shes your child. Shes a grown woman"

"Yes. And her ex is an even bigger grown man that is unhinged and wants to do very bad things to her. Shes staying here."

Darkiier glared as his creator, his aura lashing tendrils out every so often as his temper rose. But he knew there was no arguing.

"Fine. But she better stay out of my way"

*********

Mark pulled to a stop in front of the big house in the woods. Alison gaped at the sight of the beautifully crafted home and the big lake behind it

"Holy. Shit.'

Mark laughed out loud "yeah. Good taste huh?"

Alison climbed out of the car and stretched her arms out, her shirt falling off her shoulder a bit, revealing a faded scar. She grabbed what she had in Mark's car and joined him and Amy to walked up the front steps and inside

"Hello?"

"Well come in, dont just stand there" Dark said.

He watched Mark and Amy come in as he walked down the stairs and stopped as Alison stepped through the door

He took her in. Reddish brown hair, green eyes, short, not skinny but not what hed call fat. She looked around nervously and then locked eyes with her host for the next couple of weeks.

"Um...hi. Im Alison Calaway" she reached out a hand to shake his as he reached the bottom of the steps. "Its nice to meet you Dark...thank you for letting me be here"

Dark took her hand and felt almost a buzz, aside from his own aura, go through him

"Yes. Mark has told me about you. Glad i could...assist"

Amy looked at her watch "oh. We gotta go if we are going to get to bed and get on the road in the morning.... Alison are you sure youre ok?" She wasnt too sure about leaving her here with HIM all that time

"Amy Ill be fine. Yall go"

She hugged and kissed both Mark and Amy on the cheeks and watched as they climbed in Marks car and drove away.

"So...are you hungry?" Alison jumped as Dark spoke closer to her ear than she thought hed be

"Oh. Um. No. Actually. Im good. I could go for some hot tea though.

"Ah. Perfect. Come with me to the kitchen"

The ego led the way as she tried to figure out this vibe she was getting. Like he reallllly didnt want her there, but was also curious about her.... He was pretty easy on the eyes though so she figured she'd survive

She sat down at the bar as he boiled the water

"So. When you said Mark talked about me....how much did he tell you?" Alison inquired, not sure what to say

"He told me of the ex-boyfriend and why you needed somewhere to stay..... May i ask how it got to that point? If thats not too forward?"

He turned to see her absentmindedly running her fingers over a scar along her collar bone

"Well.. I was with him two years. He didnt like me having friends other than him. Didnt like when i went on the road with my Dad's company and wrestled house shows.."

Darkiplier looked at her "wait...wrestling ?"

Alison ducked her head and laughed

"heh...yeah.... Long story. Dad is practically royalty in the business and i did it for a while. ..but Shane didnt like that. Mostly because i hung out with the guys and trained with them.... So for the sake of the relationship i stayed home. Then he got to where he hated me talking to Mark, Jack...Anyone really. Long story short he attacked me a few times....the last time he almost killed me..... Chase and Jackie saved my life. They had been on the way over to get me and heard me scream. Broke in..... I had to get a lot of stitches that night. And he didnt like being told no. He took off while they were helping me. Cops have been looking for him, hes been sending me letters, showing up at places where im at. But he always takes off when i see him..... Hes gotten bolder and my parents and Mark and everyone didnt want me left alone. So here i am"

Dark studied her for a moment. He could read that she had strength. But she was broken. He couldn't understand why but he felt a tug of protectiveness in his chest at the thought of that asshole trying to track her here... At least those idiotic Septic Egos had done something right. Though letting him get away was pathetic

"Well. Dont worry. If he tries to darken my doorstep, he will surely get more than he bargined for i can assure you"

He brought two mugs over and poured the water over the tea bags. They sat and talked for hours like theyd known each other forever

****************

The next night Alison laid in her bed. It was about 12 am. Shed walked by the lake all morning, theyd gone into town and grabbed lunch and when they came home she had talked with Dark about different interests most of the night. She felt oddly at home here. Suddenly her phone rings

"Now who the hell would be calling me?.."

She hit the answer button, not recognizing the number

"Hello?"

"Aliiisoon.... Now why would you go walking around with some goth reject looking...thing where everyone could see?"

She sat bolt upright in bed, all blood draining from her face... Shane

"What the hell....how did you...?"

"Now now alleycat dont worry about how. You know you're mine. Ill always find you. Now answer me"

"Theres nothing to fucking answer Shane. Leave me alone." She scrambled out of bed and down the stairs, checking the locks.

"Ohhh alison. You cant actually think im going to leave you alone. I marked you. Youre mine... Nice house youre in though. Lots of property

She stood in the glow of the moon through the front window, shaking "shane. What do you want. Why are you doing this?"

"Because. I want whats mine"

"Im not yours! I never will be, leave me al-"

The phone was snatched from her hand. Darks aura crackling and whipping around them both, scaring her and amazing her at the same time.

"Look. Either turn yourself in or go die. Your choice..... In fact i will gladly help with one of those options. But you will leave her be Shane"

And with that he threw the phone down and crushed it

She turned and stared at him, in awe of the power oozing from him, shaking from adrenaline.

The aura calmed some as he stepped toward her and ran a finger over her collarbone and shoulders. Tracing the scars that were exposed by the sleeveless sleep shirt she wore. He looked in her eyes brimming with tears and had the sudden urge to hug her and an even stronger NEED to protect her...so he pulled her in. She buried her face in his chest and cried. Feeling helpless and grateful at the same time. The tendrils ran over her back as he held the back of her head with one hand and wrapped the other arm around her.

Finally she stepped back. Wiping her face. "Dark....im sorry. You must think im a completely useless creature... Im just so tired of being his prey"

He studied her face for a moment, then spoke, his voice low, commanding attention as he did

"Youre not his prey anymore. And while i think many of those around me are useless....youre different. And damned if i know why.."

Alison looked at him, curious, but not pushing the matter.

"I dont think ill sleep much." She was mad and scared and exhausted. But she knew what her dreams would hold

Dark put his hand on her shoulder "Well. Im just doing some paper work in my office, i could....put a pillow and blankets on the couch in there for you. You could rest while i work...perhaps that way youd feel more at ease"

Alison smiled at him, grateful for his kindness. "Ok. Yeah, maybe....if i wont be bothering you of course"

He chuckled softly "not at all dear. Come"

****

Alison watched him work thru half shut eyes. This was the big bad guy everyone spoke of...to her he didnt seem so bad. Intense for sure but....there was just something about him. The quiet way he held himself, he could walk in any room and demand attention without even trying.

"You know. Its not polite to stare at people while they work ali"

She smiled sleepily "sorry. Just thinking"

The ego cocked an eyebrow. "About?"

"Well.." She sat up from her makeshift bed hed made, one strap falling off her shoulder, exposing more of her skin, Dark suddenly felt tense, but tried to ignore it

"I mean. You're supposed to be.. Horrible. A bad guy....and yet.... I feel as if we are old friends having only known you a few days ... I trust you. Though everyone has said not to.... Im supposed to be scared of you and thats just not the case" she said

He smiled gently "Well. When you're on my good side, thats what you get. But most never see that side, only a lucky few

'And why am i one of the lucky ones? " Alison asked

Dark motioned for her to come to him 'Come here....." She got up and stepped across the room, sitting on the corner of his desk as he stood up.

"If im being honest i have no idea why i feel the way i do around you. You seem to make everything....quiet. Calm. I can think clearly for some reason.... I cant quite figure you out Alison"

He was standing directly in front of her now.

She smiled up at him "heh. Good luck with that"

The blackness grew slightly and played around the edge of her face as he stared directly into her eyes "oh don't worry princess. Ill figure you out. I always get what i want"

Alison threw her head back and laughed "hmm. With me you wont.....but like i said. Have fun with that" she went to stand and he blocked her, moving very close to her. "I rather like the effect you have...stay a moment longer?"

He rested his hand on her knee and closed his eyes. Reveling in the slience that filled him. She didnt know what to say...but staring at him with his head leaned back, hair in his face she couldn't help but feel the calm as well. She reached up and brushed the har from his eyes, fingers trailing his cheek. His hand caught hers and held it to his face as he leaned into it.

Alisons heart sped up. Dark could hear it as her cheeks flushed an adorable red. He looked at her intently suddenly not in control of his actions he put his hand to her face and pulled her to him, softly bringing their lips together

She was suprised by his actions. But more suprised at the fact that she trusted him. She leaned into the kiss, grabbed the front of his jacket .

They both were startled by the crash in the front hall. Alison jumped off the desk and took off out the door before he could stop her. Dark shook his head

"That stupid girl...."

But then he heard her yelp.... His aura crackled to life as he rushed out to the front door which was wide open. The window next to it was smashed. Alison was nowhere to be seen

"Ali?? Where the hell are you?" He shouted angrily.

He heard scuffling outside. Curses came flying out of alisons mouth. The Egos eyes darkened as he ran outside and saw her on the ground under her attacker, fighting like a wildcat. He stomped down the steps and across the grass quickly, grabbing him by the back of the neck and neatly tossing him into the side of her car.

He helped Alison up and studied her quickly. Busted lip, scratches on her arms... His anger boiled over and the dark aura he carried around seemed to grow even blacker. In short. He was pissed.

"You stupid asshole. You think you can have her?" The voice came from behind him. Dark turned and stared down Shane.

"You cant. Shes mine and she will always be mine. I dont care what you or any of your other ego friends have to say. Spandex boy and Brody couldn't stop me...what makes you think...

He trailed off as he became accutely aware of the silence that enveloped him. The anger rolling off the Ego in the form of his aura suddenly making him regret coming here

Dark spun on him, grabbing his neck and shoving him against the car. His voice came out as more of a growl

"You listen to me you insignificant toad. I dont know who the HELL you think you are, or what you *think* youre going to accomplish. But taking "ownership" of Alison Calaway isnt it. People say im a bad person. Theyve never seen me be protective of someone, so trust me when i tell you the truth can be SO much worse than youve heard. I will give you a choice. You may turn around and walk out of here, never contacting or even THINKING of that woman again. Or...

He tightened his grip on Shanes throat cutting off his air as the mans bladder let go

"Or my dear boy. I can show you what demonic really means.... Its your choice"

Shane struggled to speak 'o-okay' he whispered

"What's that? I cant hear you" Dark said. Enjoying the terror in the mans eyes

"Okay! Ill go. Ill go. Just please...dont kill me"

Dark dropped him to the ground, the black aura rolling around him, trying to contain himself. Shane scrambled to get to his car

"Ah ah" Dark said. The choice was to WALK away"

He held the keys hes taken from Shanes pocket up, jingling them and smiled evily.

"Th-thats at least ten miles through the woods! Are you insane??"

Darks eyes narrowed "guess you better get started....and hope the wolves arent especially hungry tonight.. Leave"

His aura shot out, eyes flaring. Shane pissed himself again and took off running into the night

Dark's shoulders heaved up and down as he tried to control his breathing, his body shaking with the anger. Trying to keep himself from chasing the man down and ripping his head from his body

Alison approached from behind and touched his shoulder.

"Alison...im sorry you had to see me like that. I can normally control myself...."

She tugged him to turn around and he looked at her. Blood dried on the corner of her mouth, eyes shining with tears. She placed her hand on the side of his face and he noticed her knuckles were busted from fighting back. He leaned into her touch. Her closeness calming the storm raging in his mind...how had it come to this....when had she become his safe place?

Alison tried to control her emotions...she should be terrified right now, especially after that display. But all she wanted was to hold this man. And she didnt understand. She slid one hand behind his neck and pulled his face to hers. Kissing him was less of a want and more of a gnawing need right now. He was suprised but wrapped his arms around her and kissed her back. Savoring the taste of her mouth

Alison pulled back slightly, out of breath and Dark leaned his forehead to hers, closed his eyes and smiled. Neither spoke. After a moment she pulled away completely and tugged on his hand

"Cmon. Let's go inside"

They walked into the house. Not knowing what to say to each other.

A week passed. Neither spoke about that night. Not avoiding each other but avoiding the subject. Which annoyed Darkiplier greatly. When had he become..this? Not confronting something? He longed to reach out and brush the hair from her face, touch her some way. But he got the feeling she didnt want to be touched right now.

'Well why would she you fool. After everything that jackass did, did you think shed just fall in your arms and stay there?' He said aloud to himself as he toiled in his office.

His phone buzzed with a text. He checked it to see a message from Alison. After breaking her phone hed taken her to get a new one with a new number that very few people now had.

A: "Hey... You wanna go get some drinks tonight? Im getting tired of being couped up but i dont exactly want to venture out on my own. I know itd be a bit of a drive but.."

He pondered for a moment. He could easily say no. That there was liquor here...but he knew it wasnt about the drinks for Alison. He could tell she was itching to get out. To move somewhere other than the house or the lake. She was becoming a bit like a caged tiger.

D: "Sure. Why not" ..... He had a feeling he might regret this.

****************

Darkiplier stood at the bottom of the stairs, ready to leave. He sighed. What was taking her?

'Ali. Are you coming or-"

The words are lost in his throat as she starts down the steps. Auburn hair gleaming, wearing a black and red dress that fit in all the right places and short heels.

She caught his eyes as she stepoed onto the floor and laughed "yeah. Lets go" Alison suddenly felt as if she were a piece of steak in the lions den and she didnt know why.

Dark just opened the front door for her without a word and motioned for her to go first. Trying to regain composure.

At the bar, they drank, Alison danced alone. She moved like a woman possessed. Dark just watched her intently, a feeling in his chest he couldn't quite describe. It had been a couple of hours when a man came up behind her, trying to dance too close and touch too much. Dark tensed as he saw her spin around and shove him away, then he walked over, catching the end of the trashy things he was saying to her

"Alison... Lets go"

Darkiplier didnt need to shout. Or ask her twice. She gratefully nodded her head, realxing now that she didnt feel cornered.

The whole way home she was quiet. Dozing, feeling the effects of the whiskey shed been downing all night.

When they arrived at the house she got out and walked in. She was barely through the door when Dark called to her. He stepped through the door behind her as she turned

He stared for a moment, then reached his hand out to touch her face...she flinched. She didnt mean to...it was just the thought if anyone touching her....of making her feel anything was anxiety inducing...but at the same time she wanted Dark's touch

His hand stopped mid air and his eyes darkened... He was... Sad? But angry at the same time

"I see..." He murmered. Then walked past her to his office and shut the door.

Alison stood there. Tears began to run down her face. "What the hell is happening to me" she whispered. She looked toward the office door. Wanting so badly to chase him. But tired of chasing things at the same time.

******

Darkiplier tried to focus on the computer in front of him. Itd been half an hour and hed gotten nothig done. "What the hell is wrong with you? Youre bitching and moaning after this *girl* you barely know. And for what? The feeling she gives you...pathetic" he spoke to himself condescendingly.

"You know. Speaking to yourself is the first sign of madness"

Alisons voice from the doorway made him jump. Not expecting her to be there.

"Can i come in?"

He studied her for a moment. "Yes. Of course, sit"

She walked into the room. Still in her dress but barefoot now. His breath hitched in his throat as she leaned back into the sofa and curled her legs under her,she sat the drink in her hand on the side table. He laughed. Another whiskey?

"Listen. Dark. Thank you for coming over when you did....that guy was..handsy"

He scoffed "Well. Did you think i was going to let him manhandle you? Though im sure you couldve handled it fine if need be. But i have this godforsaken need to protect you. And i still havent figured it out.."

"Dont protect me.... People that protect me get hurt...." She trailed off, thinking of Henrik stitching the cut in Chase's side after he fought with Shane that night. "Im not worth good people getting hurt"

Dark stood up and walked over to stand in front of her, then crouched so he was eye level. "Look. I told you. I think a lot of people are useless, but you arent one of them. You have this passion in you when you speak about people and things you care for. You want so badly to fight everything and feel nothing....and thats not possible. Trust me. Before you waltzed into this house i wouldnt have believed it. I was an asshole to anyone that looked at me sideways. I didnt need anything or anyone.... And then here are. Making me feel things. No my dear. Worthless is not something that should be used to describe you"

He placed a hand on her leg as he spoke, electricity running between them. She jumped but didnt flinch away this time. She stared into his eyes, taking in what hed said.

He cleared his throat and stood up "i believe this is where i tell you, im sorry if i scared you that night he came here. Im sorry if kissing you was out of line.." He grabbed her hand and pulled her to stand up "but i just couldnt help it..."

She smiled and then stared at the floor as she spoke 'you werent out of line.....unexpected maybe. But i kissed you the second time. So should i apologize for that?'

Darkiplier chuckled and put a finger under her chin, lifting her gaze to his "No my dear. Never apologize for letting me taste you... Though you may need to apologize for depriving me "

With that he captured her mouth with his. Slowly as first, then more forcefully. Her hands tangled in his hair, him holding her against him. She pulled back to breathe and his lips went to her neck. 'Dark..." She said breathlessly

"Mmmm" the sound rumbled in his chest as he caressed her back and softly kissed her skin, savoring each taste. The he looked at her and smiled wickedly "you know. Coming down in that dress... Then dancing the way you did. That wasnt very nice of you. Looking like that....moving like that in public. I very nearly pinned you to the wall then and there" his eyes danced as he spoke. Running his hands down her hips and gripping her right at the lower back to pull her closer

She laughed and smiled back at him "well. Maybe i like to torture you. Make you beg for it"

He chuckled "hmm. Me? Beg? Not on your life princess, you couldnt make me actually beg"

She stepped away from him and put one hand on his chest and grinned "oh. Is that a *challenge* i hear? Go sit in your chair over there"

He cocked an eyebrow in her direction but complied, pulling the chair to the front of the desk and sitting. This should be interesting

She turned of the lights with the switch by the door. Then walked over to his computer which was behind him on the desk. She went to a music site and put a song on. One that Dark recognized from the club. One hed watched her move to, his heartbeat quicked as he remembered the sight.

She strolled around back to where shed sat her glass and downed it. Then walked to just out of his easy reach and began to move to the music. Body swaying to the beat. Eyes closed. A little drunk but in control and knowing what she was doing. The moonlight played along her body.

Darkiplier reached to touch her and she swatted his hand away.

"Oh no. Put your hands away....you cant touch unless you ask...beg for it." She said mischeviously. "Your hands cannot touch me. But i...oh i cant touch you"

She stepped closer, bending down, holding his knees as she did and bringing her body up in a way so that her face, then chest were right in front of his face. She turned and bent between his knees before coming back up slowly, grinding against him, his hands clenching. His aura crackling around them with his need. But he would not break. He couldnt. His pride wouldnt let him.

But then. Alison straddled him. Legs on either side and sat in his lap. Still moving her body to the beat of the music, leaning back as she moved her hips. This was dangerous territory. She wanted him to touch her. But she also wanted to hear him ask. Dark, to his benefit was trying to keep his composure, but the hardness beneath her was giving him away.

The music stopped and she sat. Still straddling him and put her arms over his shoulders. She grinned at him

"You gonna break?"

Dark laughed. This little minx. If she thought for one second that he was going to-

All thought flew from his brain as he felt her lips on his neck. Her hand tangled in the back of his hair. She ran her tongue along it and then along his lips. Kissing him lightly 'cmon baby. You know you want it. All you have to do is say it.... Let go of the control for once"

He reached to hold her and she caught each of his wrists and held them down "ah ah darky. Not until you ask nicely" she purred in his ear and she ground against him again. Torturing herself as much as she was him

'Alison.." It came out as a half moan, half warning.

She stood up and let go of his wrists and grinned. "Well. I guess ill just have to go to bed alone then."

As she turned she unzipped her dress and let it fall as she walked across the room. Darkipliers eyes almost came out of his head at the sight of her in her black bra and panties. Now this was just evil....

He crossed the room behind her and slammed the door before she could get to it. She turned to see him staring at her in a way that made her feel very much like a wounded animal in front of a panther. He rolled his head to either side with his eyes closed and then stared her down again, his arm over her shoulder against the door, trapping her there

"Now Alison. You have given me great needs. Id like it very much if youd stop torturing me like this'

A playful smile played over her face "but its fun to see you squirm darlin" she licked her lips.

He stared at her than went to his knees "Fine. Is this what you what? You want me to admit i need you? Well here. I absolutely need you. In many ways. Right now i need you to let me run my hands over you, to taste you, to caress every inch inside and out that i can reach Miss Calaway"

He again reach for her hips and this time she didnt stop him. His kissed her on either side, tongue lightly darting over her stomach. He stood and backed her into the wall. Now it was his turn. He grabbed her by the back of her head and roughly captured her mouth, one hand gripping her ass. He moved to her neck, nipping her as she moaned and held onto his shoulders, one hand gripping his head.

"You know im going to have to punish you for that little one" he growled in her ear before.lightly biting her shoulder. She gasped at the sensation

"Ye..yes"

"And you do not need to try that all the time....not that i dont enjoy you being a little forceful.... Are we clear?" He moved to the other side of her neck, pushing his waist to hers as he kissed

"Yes"

"Yes what kitten?" He stared into her eyes as he said this. Conveying a need for her trust. Then he kissed her deeply before allowing her to answer

"Ye-yes sir?"

That did it. His groaned and grabbed the back of both of her legs and picked her up, her lega going around his waist and slammed her against the door as he kissed her. His tongue and lips exploring her neck and chest as she closed her eyes and let the passion wash over her

************

Dark stroked her hair as she lay in his arms. They were in his bed. Having made their way up here and finally she fell asleep after one more time. He smiled. She looked innocent but was decidely not.

Her skin was warm against his. Breast pressed against the side of his chest. He studied her sleeping face. Had he really said it... After the last time. Did those words come from his mouth?

He had said he loved her and she had thrown her head back and begged him to say it again. And when he had, louder this time she collapsed into his arms and whispered it back to him.

Where the words came from he didnt know. But they seemed so natural. He kissed her face and heard birds chirping....it was 5am..looks like theyd nap most of the day. But that was perfectly fine.

His phone buzzed on the night stand. He reached with one arm and grabbed it. Seeing a message from Mark

M:hey. Alisons parents are headed back to their place. If you want her go go, she can.

Darkiplier lauged and shot a text back

D:No. I dont think i want her going anywhere. Im going to keep her a little longer ;)

M:......what did you do

D:Now ask yourself. Do you really want the honest answer to that question from me?

M:... No. You know what. Probably not. Ill stop by when we get back to town next week

D:ok. Be sure to call first. Make sure we're decent and all

M: yeah ok.....and please dont allude to that again...ever

Dark laughed and sat his phone back down. Then wrapped around alison and fell into a heavy sleep...the most peaceful hed known in his existence.

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