#oblivious idiots /pos

[kiwibirb1]

Lesbians would both offer to sleep on the floor, and then cuddle on the floor, thinking the other isn't in love with them

Why you gotta fricken out me like this mate

[mochiwrites]

I know it wasn't the point of your post but Secret Husbands in 3rd Life and Martyn saying Grian needed to be saved from Scar... what if the Evo members did know Grian was married, just not that he's married to Scar?

So Marytn sees the two being shameless, but isn't connecting the dots right away, Scar is tricking a married man! Yes Ren they're flirting that's the problem!

HELP??? WAIT THATS SO GOOD,,,,

and of course martyn just. doesn’t think “oh yeah, surely scar is grian’s husband considering how they’re shamelessly flirting.” OF COURSE NOT. THAT’D BE TOO EASY LMAO

scar is tricking a married man… HELP ME /pos

“you must let nature take its course, me hand.”

“NATURE TAKING ITS COURSE IS THE OPPOSITE OF WHAT WE WANT—” oh martyn buddy. there isn’t a world where you’re Not suffering WHEEZE

that creates such a funny dynamic of martyn trying to keep scar from “being a home-wrecker” while the hermits are trying to finally get these two idiots together, while the empires people are Actually aware they’re married (for the bit, I don’t think anyone in empires mentions anything to jimmy and pearl because they just assume they know as grian’s siblings)

and grian and scar are (initially) oblivious to ALL of this

IM IN TEARS THIS IS SO GOOD

[venomousray]

CINDERELLAS CASTLE SPOILERS TO THOSE WHO HAVEN’T BLOCKED THE TAG!!

Here’s my thoughts on Cinderellas castle. It’s my new favourite starkid show. I’ve never felt more. Attached to media before honestly and everything about this show was perfect. The prince dying a completely oblivious idiot? I loved it! Ella casually being killed? FUCKING GENIOUS. The cast did such a good job on Cinderella’s castle and I just loved it.

Keeping silent about ragweed was so fun because I got a little teaser from my Joey cameo that there was a character called ragweed at some point. And crumb. Crumb and hop a lot. They weren’t in the show too often but. I loved them so much. Crumb is just my son now I’ve adopted him.

This was literally me after finishing the show /POS

[prettyboykatsuki]

Alpha Bachira…. Fang you just unleashed something terrible inside of me (/pos) do you have anymore a/b/o bllk thots?

mostly a lot of dynamics i really like for bllk a/b/o au that im more than willing 2 discuss... some favorites include.

alpha rin x beta reader aka rin constantly losing his fucking mind around you all the time and you being. absolutely lost about it. also you taking care of him through his rut which makes the situation looking very confusing to outsides bc u treat him a little bit like a sad puppy

beta sae x omega reader .... think of this one so much. omega reader who sae respects as an equal and doesn't really get as an omega being caught up in their heat and having a Breakdown about it. a Moment where he wonders if he's really a beta bc he knows only alphas are this worked up before it clicks it's the sight of you that makes him like that....

omega passing bachira who is actually an alpha x omega reader my beloved.......... so beloved...... bachira who makes reader feels so safe so comfy they're besties forever but then they get a little tipsy and reader kisses bachira and woah he's really good at that and woah he's hung and definitely not an omega like he thoughs.

omega shidou x alpha reader but like inverse dynamics because the idea of shidou purposefully seeking you out during your rut makes me unbearably insane.

beta isagi x alpha reader ... this one is self indulgent idc but thats life... the beauty of it... its something about beta isagi being covered in scent and completely oblivious while reader is sweet and lets him feel very in charge hfffhgfd. no one bothers telling him either <3 clueless idiot beta isagi <3

i think chigiri has the most traditional alpha / omega dynamics!!!! but he's very pretty so people always assume he's an omega. they learn v quickly. barou is the most traditionally alpha alpha but he's the very Safe / Protector type bc his little sisters are omegas and he hates creeps. in this specific au he also doesnt like bachira hehdjfjksdk. and i think kunigami is a beta!! for the main group.

nagi is an alpha (hates it and finds it bothersome af) and reo is an omega (and a desperate one. bless his spirit.)

tw oliver aiku is an alpha and it does absolutely what you'd expect to his sleazebag tendency but specifically that he has the one in a million fated pair thing and it's actually the worse situation for everyone involved!!!!!! his mate is an omega that's independent. they hate each other and are fated to be together. its awful !

[anoant-haikyuu-dump]

You’ve got me! I have been indoctrinated into the fukutora cult lol. They’re just so good! 

Also I hc Fukunaga as having selective mutism, and I feel like Tora would be really good at interpreting him :). Like, fukunaga never really bothered to learn sign because he thought it wasn’t really important and so few people can understand sign anyway, and he can usually get a point across without it. And then tora turns up and for whatever reason he can just read fukunaga’s expressions and gestures really well and doesn’t judge him at all and aahhhhhhh! /pos 

(Am I projecting? Who knows)

FUKUTORA NATION WE CONTINUE TO GROW, glad to hear it dude!!

I see selectively mute or nonverbal hcs for Fukunaga a lot and I think they're great!! It's cool when mute characters go against the shy stereotype and are actually pretty energetic/sociable. In Fukunaga's character sheet it says his current concern is "Yamamoto tells him to 'Talk more, c'mon'". I think Tora—the oblivious idiot he is—would pester him about talking for the first few weeks before someone finally fills him in. After that he'd start teaching himself sign in an attempt to better understand him only to learn that Fukunaga himself doesn't even know it (though he's touched by the gesture). It doesn't matter anyways cause they just seem to get each other, when Inuoka and Shibayama first join the team they're convinced that the two are psychic.

ANYWAYS YOU'RE COOKING, THIS WAS VERY SWEET! THANK YOU FOR THE ASK, also nice saiki pfp

[burninghalls]

❝the archons have sent me a fool to love❞

summary: alhaitham is a fool and you hate him so pairings: alhaitham x gender neutral reader tw/cw: enemies to lovers (obviously), one sided hatred, hurt/comfort, alhaitham is an oblivious dense idiot, happens before sumeru archon quest (they still have the Akasha Terminal), maybe ooc but I hope not too much

If it wasn’t for the cold breeze of the rain or the fastening drops of water, you would’ve gotten home by now. You made sure to check the weather forecast this morning; you even did a double-check in case you read the wrong thing. It was said that the day was going to be mostly sunny with a bit of cloudy weather during the evening. But alas, you’ve been fooled once more by the now questionable data from Akasha Terminal.

Was this Lesser Lord Kusanali’s doing? Is this the punishment you have to endure as the result of the long-lasting unfaithfulness toward the archons you’ve held for so long? Whatever this is, sulking under the roof of the Akademiya is not going to help you one bit. But then again, you would rather not get your clothes soaked.

Perhaps you can ask Kaveh for help.

The reminder of the lovely blond architect has put your mind at ease. Perhaps Kaveh has decided to bring an umbrella before he leaves this morning, or even if he didn’t, then you can at least have someone to sit around with while waiting for the rain to stop.

The walk to the House of Daena isn’t something to fret about. In a few minutes, you can already see the door leading to the inside of the enormous library. Sometimes you wonder how many kinds of books are available in there. You love reading as much as the rest of the students do, but even you know there are still hundreds of books whose covers you haven’t marked with your fingers. Still, reading is an essential need for a student, even if it manages to tire you one of these days.

But just to your luck, you couldn’t spot the familiar lock of blond hair upon entering the place. You’ve even asked some people around if they have seen Kaveh in the past hours, but most of them were too enamored by the contents of their books to notice anyone around. Plus, judging by the thick papers of each book they hold, it would be safe to assume they have been enamored for at least the whole day. You might’ve felt sorry for their workloads if it weren’t for the stacks of paper that have been untouched for days, just laying around on your own table at home.

"I thought you left an hour ago."

Great, just great. How can this day be any worse than this? Surely it cannot.

Kaveh has said a lot of things about Alhaitham. The most dominant words to describe the seemingly harmful man are arrogance and pride. You’re not someone who judges people so quickly just by what others think about them. But Alhaitham is a special case. Being in the same Darshan as the man isn’t helping your resentment towards him either.

"It started to rain a while ago. I had to take care of some stuff before I leave, and suddenly I noticed the water drops," you explained coldly, never once looking at him. You busy yourself once again with scanning the room, looking for someone to save you from the horrible disaster you’re about to encounter.

"You didn’t bring an umbrella?" he asks of you, and your brain starts forming the conclusion that Alhaitham is very dense at noticing your looks of hatred towards him. He’s always been like this, even since the first day you mocked him bluntly in front of his own face. "Are you looking for Kaveh?"

Dense, but not stupid. "I was, but I couldn’t find him. Do you know where he is?" You may as well ask him now that he’s more than willing to start a conversation with you. The feeling is not mutual, however.

"He went home early to finish some of his deadlines. You know how he is." Classic Kaveh and his stupid tendencies toward procrastination. "I can take you to him if you want. He’s my roommate after all."

"I didn’t bring my umbrella this morning," you answered him with a polite smile, as polite as you could muster. "It’s fine, I’ll wait here until the rain stops."

"That won’t do." You finally looked over at him for the first time since he first talked to you. You can see his brows furrowing with the determined gaze he throws at you. Oh no, this is never a good sign. "I can’t let you wait here for the rest of the day. Who knows when the rain will finally come to an end? I insist you let me take you home since I’ve brought an umbrella with me."

"No, it’s okay." You insist on having him back.

"No, please. Let me help you just this once." He’s a very persistent man, but you’re as stubborn as a rock.

"You don’t have to pretend to care like this," you said. "I know you would rather go home by yourself, and frankly, so do I. Please just let me stay here. I have some unfinished works that need to be done here anyways, and there are some books that I need to read."

Alhaitham drops his cool facade, and you swear you can see a stroke of disappointment painting his face. "Is it the essay from the lecture last week? I’ve already finished mine; perhaps I can help you with that."

He’s infuriating. "I’ve told you, it’s alright, Alhaitham. I would feel indebted to you if you offered me such a favor. I need not have that; I’m capable of doing it by myself."

Before you can walk away from him, however, he decided to win the pointless argument you two have going on. "I’ve been holding the books that you require for the essay. I even asked for an extended period for borrowing the books. I know you know as well that the Akasha Terminal might not offer you information as good as the old books here do. So, I’m afraid staying here any longer would give you no satisfying result at the end of the day unless you reconsider my offer."

You take a deep breath. "How much do I need to pay for you to give me the books, then?"

"Zero mora and a few minutes of your time." His answer makes your blood boil.

Truthfully, when you first met Alhaitham, you didn’t think that any hatred would come between the two of you. He’s a well-educated person, and so are you. With enough time and process, you both might even be able to be friends because your brains work perfectly for each other. And you both did get along at first. Alhaitham’s brain completed yours, as yours did to him. Until the first result for the monthly exam came in.

You were in second place, and honestly, at that time, you were fine with it. Life doesn’t have to be a competition; as long as you get a good score, you’re more than happy with your result. That was until Alhaitham told you about his score. You knew Alhaitham quite well at that time, so it didn’t surprise you that he had managed to score first on the rankings. You were about to give him a congratulatory note when he started to compare his results with yours. Ending the day with broken pride, you decided to stay away from Alhaitham from now on. It angered you more when he approached you the next day, not knowing that his words from the day before had managed to hurt you more than he realized. When you told him about this, however, he answered with an unbothered reply that sounded like he did mean to hurt your feelings after all.

It was such a shame that you even used to admire him so much during the short period of time you both bound yourselves into a friendly relationship. If it wasn’t for Kaveh, you might’ve avoided the man like a plague the moment you decided to end things with him.

"Why do you want to be with me so badly? This isn’t the first time you’ve done this, you know? I’ve told you many times I don’t want to be associated with you anymore." He flinched at your words.

Alhaitham nods after a beat. He doesn’t look like he likes the decision you’ve made, but he can’t do anything about it. "I’ll leave once you tell me why you’ve been avoiding me for months now. Did I do something wrong to you?"

With all your might, you hold yourself back from groaning in annoyance. Is he playing with you right now? How could he not know? "Because you’re arrogant and too prideful for my liking. Remember that one time you bragging about your score being higher than mine? Or that time you literally shoved your achievements in my face?"

"Huh?" He seems to be deep in thought, perhaps calculating his next words to minimize the damage he could’ve brought to this conversation. "You don’t like it when I do that?"

"I don’t what?" Now you’re just as confused as ever.

"I wasn’t familiar with the concept of relationships that much; the only strong relationship that I’ve had is the one with my grandmother," he begins. "I’ve had friends before, but none I can call a close friend. Kaveh is another example of a failed result of me trying to befriend someone, though it’s mostly his fault for having such an insufferable personality. But then there’s you. We clicked almost instantly, and perhaps you’re the only person I can tolerate. Your company is actually quite enjoyable for me, and I wish I could spend more time with you. What I’m trying to say is that the bragging I’ve been doing to you was an attempt to impress you."

"Impress me?"

"Yes, impress you. But it seems like it’s not as effective as I thought it would be." You think? " There was this one book that I read once, when you were still talking to me, that spoke about how to get closer to someone. At that time, I needed help since I loved what we had, and I would do anything to keep it that way. I was afraid that my upbringing might cause a strain in our newfound relationship, so I read the book until the very last page. One of the passages said that people like it when you’re proud of yourself and confident of your own talents. So I did so to you, but now that I think about it, I overdid it a bit."

This man is ridiculous. "I agree, you did overdo it. I tried to tolerate it once, but after it happened again, I figured being friends with you would only cause the both of us pain. I don’t want to compete with my own friend." He sighs at your words. "But, I do realize that I should’ve told you about what I felt. Instead of just running away from you, I should’ve said something to fix it. I won’t stand here to lie and say that I’ve never liked your company as well."

With carefully threaded words and a calculative mood on his side, he raised his arms to reach yours, and you accepted him. "I’m truly sorry. I never knew my words would bring you such pain. I should’ve been more careful about how I acted around the people I loved."

The people, who what?

Alhaitham is quick to notice your distressed expression. "Forgive me. You don’t have to say anything right away, and you can even reject my advances now if you want. I won’t force you to reciprocate the feelings I have for you, but I can’t keep it within me if we want to try to at least be friends again. I've really missed you, and if you want, we can try to salvage our broken relationship. I care not what you think of me after this; I ask nothing but your forgiveness."

He said it so simply that you wouldn’t feel your stomach doing a flip and your heart being stabbed by thousands of swords just by hearing his words. In truth, your feelings for Alhaitham have always been more than just friendship since the very beginning. The man is undeniably handsome, and his intelligence has only made him more attractive in your eyes. Perhaps that is why the hatred you feel for him runs deeper than the hatred you would’ve felt if he were merely a friend. To witness the scholar confess himself before you is indeed another thing. But even then, you tried to compose yourself, even with the raging tide inside of you.

"You’re saying that you have had feelings for me all along?" You laugh as he sighs in embarrassment. "You’re quite adorable, you know. I’m surprised you didn’t tell me about this way earlier; it seems like you’re not as stupid as I thought."

"I’m not stupid. Just inexperienced," he defends himself, but smiles along when his eyes catch your own. "You’ve hurt me too, you know. I may have the most faults, but you aren’t innocent either."

"Hm, you’re right. I’m sorry. And for the record, your feelings are definitely reciprocated," you said. "We’re both so stupid."

Alhaitham then tugs at your hands, trying to drag you away with him. "Now that that’s settled, I assume you won’t mind me walking you home then?" You notice the way he looks away from you in an attempt to hide his blush. But still, you agreed to his request happily.

"As long as you promised to show me the book you mentioned earlier later. I’m curious now that you’ve brought it up."

He groaned at your request but agreed anyway. You wonder what Kaveh would think about the two of you now.

[yarart4ever]

TiPo fanfic tropes I'd die for

I'm bored so here is me telling y'all my favorite tropes for TiPo that I love to read/write (warning some parts are le spicy-) sorry this is gonna be looooong

+ modern or highschool aus. typically with Tigress being of high status and Po being the "new" guy. I NEED MY BISEXUAL GIRLBOSS AND MY DORKY MALEWIFE IN THIS SETTING IMMEDIATELY OMGGGG

+ stories like. right after the end of kfp 2. it's usually very intimate, peaceful yet solemn at the same time and it's just. ugh. the hurt/comfort genre is strong with this one. BONUS POINTS IF PO OPENS UP ABOUT WHAT HE DISCOVERED ABOUT HIS PANDA VILLAGE

+ pining Tigress. I love me some flustered Po (especially since he's such a fanboy and him being in love with Tigress is SO CANON-) but. I a a sucker for the "they fell first but they fell harder" trope bc OMG. the thought of Tigress, cold, hardcore Tigress, catching feelings for Po? it's just so sweet to me to see the usually composed tiger get so flussy, even if it ain't as obvious as Po's pining is. her tail swishing behind her when he touches her? catching herself getting lost in Po's eyes before clearing her throat? instantly relaxing after Po rests his paw on her shoulder? knees easily buckling into his pleas? UGH I AM HERE FOR IT!

+mutual pining one-shots. quite similar to Tigress pining but they are *both* lovesick idiots. the slowburn is very much apparent but the romantic tension is so there like YALL JUST KISS ALREADY- or actually don't. stay comfy and close like this. it's cute :3 but maybe like hold hands if you can

+Tigress being able to gain more feeling in her paws when in contact to Po. like it is so unrealistic but IDC MY TIPO HEART DOES NOT HAVE AN OFF BUTTON-

+okay so like- them both acting out when they see the other get hurt in battle- like say Po got hurt and Tigress just rips the people they are fighting a new one just to make sure her panda is okay or Tigress getting struck and maybe even knocked out and Po just- flips out- loses it- goes feral- I live for that shit

+ WHEN THE FURIOUS FIVE, PO'S DADS, MASTER SHIFU- LITERALLY EVERYONE IN THE VALLEY SEES PO AND TIGRESS' CHEMISTRY SO WELL AND TIGRESS AND PO ARE THE ONLY ONES WHO ARE OBLIVIOUS TO IT DESPITE ACTING LIKE AN OLD MARRIED COUPLE phew sorry for yelling- bONUS POINTS FOR THE FURIOUS FIVE TEASING THE TWO AND PO'S DADS ASKING PO ABOUT HIS RELATIONSHIP WITH TIGRESS

+ dom Po. will not comment any further.

+ Po letting Tigress loosen up. getting her to laugh, to play with kids, to dance, literally any of those things that make her feel carefree and childlike and Po just. watching in awe. and ENCOURAGING her to do so. how beautiful is that?

+ TiPoLei family! TiPoLei family! TIPOLEI FAMILY! (bonus points if everyone jokes about Po and Ti basically being Lei Lei's parents and them just going "yeah. sounds about right. that's our daughter :)" thus confusing everyone PFFF)

+ them being each other's dates to any festival that goes on. like they don't even need to ask each other it's just obvious from how Tigress sticks by Po's side and only participates bc Po asked her to LMAO

+ jealous Tigress- I know that people see these kinds of tropes as a bit problematic if not done right but gosh do I love me some jelly Tigress. pLUS THE DENIAL SHE WOULD PULL WHEN IT IS SO OBVIOUS? sign me tf up

+ I don't think I've ever seen anyone actually write this but I would love to have that little moment where. say in between kfp2 and kfp3 when Tigress got her new golden hanfu and everyone is praising her for it and Po. he just sees her for the first time in that new hanfu and does that cute lovestruck ":O" expression as he stays quiet and frozen. and Tigress is asking stuff like "Po, you okay? what's wrong?" thus taking him out of his trance and making him flustered- YES PLEASE

okay this is getting way too long I'm gonna end it from here okay bye-

[bohemian-nights]

What’s your opinion on show and book!Viserys (Rhaenyra’s father not her son btw)?

Where do I even begin🤦🏽‍♀️ I apologize in advance because this is going to be a rant and probably won’t be that coherent.

I straight up hate his guts. Sorry not mincing any words because he’s a f*cking idiotic selfish POS(actually that’s an insult to sh*t) Jacka** whose actions(or rather lack of actions cause this MF does nothing) almost single-handedly destroyed an entire dynasty. Seriously f*ck both the show and the book versions of him are literally the worst.

If anyone is looking for one character to blame the Dance on, well look no further than this turd because he’s the reason for all the unnecessary chaos.

Book!Viserys gets 1/2 a point over show!Viserys based on the fact that he never orders Aemma to be cut open, but he’s just as stupid and selfish as show!Viserys.

I think out of all the characters on the show Viserys is the one who’s changed the least fundamentally from his book counterpart. The only major difference is the Aemma situation, he’s not a creepy pedo(cause he and Alicent only have a ten-year age gap), and he “cares” for Helaena and her children in the book(I say “care” loosely because if he cared he would’ve realized that those babies would become targets the moment he died).

Fundamentally, Viserys is a character who is willfully oblivious to what's happening around him. He’s created a powder keg situation yet he fails to notice it because he thinks his word is law and everyone should just blindly follow what he says because he’s the king. He can break tradition because he is king. He can make the rules up as he goes and spit in the face of others because he is the king.

Let me be clear, there is nothing wrong with breaking the precedent of succession for favoring males over their female relatives. However, this dude is a. A hypocrite(the whole reason why he is king is because he was a man whereas Rhaenys who had the greater claim was a woman) and b. A dumb dumb.

The moment Alicent popped out Aegon II he created a succession crisis. You can not tell me that he didn't realize that Otto and Alicent would put Rhaenyra first over their own flesh and blood cause he would never do that himself. He should’ve never married her if he wanted to keep Rhaenyra as heir.

(And as much as I rag on her, you know what, the reason why she’s so horrible is because of him. He was a sh*tty father to her just as much as his other kids).

He was the king. It’s not like he loved Alicent. He could’ve had any number of mistresses and fathered any number of bastards no one would care and they wouldn’t be a threat to his daughters claim like his true born sons were, but what does he do? He marries her anyway.

You could make the argument that oh Rhaenyra was his eldest child so the Hightowers should’ve respected that, but Viserys also helped to facilitate another succession crisis by turning a blind eye to Rhaenyra having obvious bastards(he got lucky that Corlys for the longest time cared more about appearances than his blood).

While everything might have been okay for Rhaenhra had the Targtowers not been in the picture(or if they bent the knee), No one, and I mean no one was going to take those boys being made king and the Lord of the Tides seriously once he, Rhaenyra, and I guess Corlys, had died.

If Viserys actually loved any of his children he would’ve named Aegon his heir, married Rhaenyra off to a man who she could have a fulfilling marriage with, and called it a day, but nope. This dummy really let his guilty conscience(and his nether regions) ruin his family(I believe that even book!Viserys felt some guilt over Aemma dying which is why he kept Rhaenyra as heir and allowed her to do whatever).

If this is your favorite character(I doubt he has any actual fans except god bless him, Paddy) please tell me why because there is absolutely nothing likable about him:

I apologize for posting this yucky picture, but I’m so glad they decided to make him look like a rotting corpse instead of making him fat like in the book. His outsides started matching his insides and it’s what he deserved🤡

Bottom line show!Alicent is a saint for putting up with him and I don’t blame book!Alicent one bit for letting his putrid corpse rot for days on end. He's the reason why House Targ almost went extinct(and why they lost their dragons for basically 200 years).

[warczacy]

Since this was geting too long and Skra and Czarny are living in my head rent free apparentely.

I know the first time they meet again is when Czarny is sitting on the komora trafo stairs listening to his friends Kruchy love problems and drinking beer like you should do in this situation. Kruchy is in the middle of the "what does that even mean Czarny. Tell me how." when he spots someone walking down the pavement and jumps with "do you have light koleszko".

Skra doesn't here the question because he's walking, listening to music on his walkmen and looking at his shoes oblivious to anything going on. That is until something is blocking his way. "Sorry, didn't hear you, what's the problem?" Powie Skra zdejmując słuchawki. Co oczywiście wkurzy nieźle podchmielonego już Kruchego i pewnie doszłoby do rękoczynów, gdyby Czarny nie zainterweniował. "Leave random people alone, I have a lighter, here take it and tell me one more time how that happened". He's not sure why he acts like that phisically taking Kruchy back while giving the boy signs to get the fuck out of there. It's only two days later when his falling a sleep than he realises that the boy reminds him of his first crush.

Skra on the other hand is just pissed. On po prostu nienawidzi dresów, a w szczególności tych, który zaczepiają ludzi bez powodu.

The next time Skra and Czarny meet it's at the rynek with their mothers talking happy.

idk @troubled-mind what do you think?

Kruchy and Mysz second parring. Kruchy make ammends after he dedicates Stachursky's Zostańmy razem to Mysz at the Acapulco discotheque. Mysz can't be mad after that because he's such an idiot.

[butterflyintochains]

Getting The Talk

Just a little TangerKarlsson thing, set roughly after 'Those Small Details' and 'Finding Out'. The team are incredibly protective over Tanger after all he's been through, so, upon learning of this supposed long term relationship he's been in. There is a step Erik must be put through before everyone moves forward.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Erik is confused as hell right now, to put it lightly. He has no idea what Sid wanted him down at Cranberry for a day after the season ended. Things didn't go entirely to plan, but Erik has Kris, and that's all that matters. Kris, however, is probably in bed still, sleeping peacefully without him. Kris did briefly laugh and wish him luck when the text came, though. Still, Erik wanted to sleep in with his partner this morning, not have to drive down to the training rink for no good reason. He parks, huffs out an irritated breath, and heads inside. He first heads to the team's now cleared out dressing room. Dreading whatever is inside, he opens the doors, and enters the room, seeing basically half the team sitting at their stalls. ''Hi, guys, what can I do for you today?'' He asks happily.

Sid seems to be in business mode today, because all he says is. ''Take a seat, Erik.'' Oh, first names, this is serious. Erik could inquire further, but thinks better of it, and sits down at his stall. ''Okay, I'm sat, can I know why I've been pulled out of a warm bed at nine in the morning?''

Geno bluntly asks him. ''When did all this with Kris start?'' Okay... what the hell? Erik simply says. ''I've told you, Geno, the 2011 All Star Game, we agreed to be exclusive the following year. Why? Why is this important?''

Rusty asks, arms crossed over his chest. ''What about after our 2017 cup run? He was miserable, for a long time, too. What was that about?'' Ah, yes, his biggest sin in life, the 2017 fuck up of the millennium. ''I'm not proud of it, Rusty. I was angry we lost, took it out on the man I love, and we broke up. I hate myself for it still, I was a fucking idiot for it.''

PO, all but a son to them in spirit, asks. ''When did you two get back together, then?''

Erik allows himself a small smile, nostalgia for that night flooding in. ''Funny enough, the 2019 All Star game in San Jose. I guess the love was too strong, and we just... agreed to give things another go.'' Sid suddenly sits up straighter, looking thunderstruck. ''Wait, 2019? I was there! And, I found out about you two in january this year! How the hell did that slip by me?''

Erik chuckles, risking a jab at his new captain and brother-in-law. ''That's not our fault, Sid. We literally kissed in the bar that night, you were too busy talking to Flower and Nate to notice.'' Jeff asks, humoured by Sid's obliviousness. ''How did Flower know about you two so early?''

Geno remarks, examining his nails. ''Flower knows everything, Carts.'' That much is true, he is a goalie after all, and Kris' confidant. He's surprised Flower isn't here to grill him as well. Tristan pipes up, asking him. ''How serious is this thing between you and Kris?'' Erik furrows his brows. ''Tristan, we live together, we've been together longer than you've been in the NHL.''

Sid asks the big question, looking Erik in the eyes. ''What are your intentions towards Kris? Do you love him?''

Erik states, because this is as much a fact as grass being green. ''I love Kris more than anything in this world. I intend to make him happy, to support him, to stand by his side forever. I don't entirely know if I deserve him, but I love Kris. And, he loves me.'' Geno asks further. ''Would you ever hurt him again like you did back then?''

Erik shakes his head. ''No, I'd rather die than hurt him, Geno. I pushed him away once, I'm never doing that again.''

Sid nods. ''Good, he means the world to us, Erik. If anything happens to him, this entire thing falls apart. He's my brother, and I'll see no harm come to him.''

Erik swallows, throat dry from talking. ''He means the world to me too, Sid. Like I say, I'd rather die than do anything to hurt him.'' Finally, Marcus speaks up, asking. ''Has anyone ever tried to pull you away from him?''

Erik nods, that's not been exactly fun to navigate the last decade and a bit. ''Yeah, lots of people in this league. They tried, all of them failed. I'm his, he's mine, end of story.''

Sid remarks, chuckling a bit. ''Kris used to deal with that too, used to piss him off. He'd complain about being flirted with, always said he was taken, I never once thought he was taken by you.'' Well, who wouldn't flirt with Kris? Good to know most hockey players are switched on at least. ''That doesn't surprise me. I mean, look at him, y'know?''

A french-canadian voice from the doorway chimes in. ''Likewise, mon amour.'' The entire room looks to Kris, leaning against the doorway, hand on his hip, a massive smile on his face. Kris strides in, and sits at his stall next to Erik. It's only now that everyone can feel how powerful they are together, how deep this love runs. ''How did this all come to be, Kris?'' Rusty asks.

Kris shrugs, running his index finger down his nose. ''We were in practice, saw each other across the ice, and the rest is history.'' Erik laughs, nudging Kris on the shoulder. ''Then, this idiot does fastest skater backwards to impress me.''

Kris jokes, a very slight flush rising on his cheeks. ''You liked it, don't lie to me. Made Keith look stupid, I still won.''

Jeff asks them both. ''I still don't get it, why keep this a secret for so long?''

Kris says, indicating to Sid and Geno. ''They are why. We saw the media attention that Sid and Geno get, how public it all was, and we wanted none of that. We wanted to be Kris and Erik: the men. Not Letang and Karlsson: the players.''

Erik adds. ''That's what we still want, really, I'd have hated to live this last decade in a fishbowl.''

Geno nods, and agrees with them. ''The media hasn't been fun, that's for sure. I love you, Sid, but the press are dumb.'' Sid nods, they've got a point there. ''Yeah, I feel that too, G.''

Marcus asks Kris. ''How long had you been standing there?'' Kris says, grinning. ''Long enough. Kinda funny hearing you guys try to be intimidating, to be honest.''

Sid looks incredulous at the notion he isn't as intimidating as he'd like to be. ''What? You think I'm not intimidating enough?'' Kris cocks an eyebrow at his brother. ''Sid, last I looked, I lead us in penalty minutes this year.'' Everyone bursts out laughing.

Kris addresses the room as a whole. ''Look, boys, I know you love me. But, Erik and I are very happy together, we've been through a lot, long distance included. We're okay, we're settled, we're excited for what's to come.''

Geno asks, smiling when Erik takes Kris' hand in his own, and Kris rests his head on Erik's shoulder. ''Are you sure?'' Erik nods, and says, body now completely relaxed. ''We're sure.'' Sid looks at his best friend, usually so stoic, his body soft with comfort. They do fit together so well, and look so content together. ''Do you speak each other's languages?'' Sid asks, his Russian leaves a lot to be desired to be put lightly.

Erik nods. ''Yeah, I had Kris and Flower teach me french, I think I'm pretty good at it.''

Kris assures him. ''Your french is great, amour, trust me. Erik and Horny have taught me all the swedish I know.'' Erik says, lovingly praising him. ''You're the best student I've had, hjartat.''

Rusty asks, seeming a bit confused by that. ''Why? You two speak perfect english to each other.''

Kris simply states, lifting his head back up. ''That's what you do for the one you love, Rusty. Besides, we live between Montreal and Sweden in summer, so we need both.''

Geno asks Kris. ''So, that's why you and Horny stayed late after training all that time? He was teaching you swedish for Karl?'' Kris nods, smiling brightly. ''Wow.'' Geno says.

To make things even more surreal, Sully walks in, he must've known this meeting was happening today, because he just laughs. He's known the core for a decade now, and is deeply in tune with all their weird quirks. But, as if he's a father interrogating his child's significant other, he asks Erik and Kris. ''So, this is you two, then? I have two power couples to coach now?''

Kris nods, and says. ''Yeah, pretty much.'' Sully nods, and adds something to his phone. ''Good to know.'' He leaves after that.

After the little meeting is over, the assembled Penguins head to Kris and Erik's place for lunch together. They eat outside so as to enjoy the beautiful spring day. Kris is deep in conversation with Tristan, PO, Rusty, and Carts. Sid says to Erik. ''You know, grilling aside, I could not be happier for you two, you know? I've known Kris for so long, but I've never seen him more at peace.''

Erik smiles, and looks over to Kris again, they share a look. ''Thank you, Sid. It's not been easy for us, but here we are.'' Geno says, backing Sid up. ''You deserve each other, Karl.'' Erik nods, he doesn't say anything, just gives his concerned partner an assuring nod. They'll be okay, and now they know they've got the entire team behind them.

That night, Erik slumps down in bed next to Kris, and says. ''Y'know, that might just have been the weirdest day of my life since I got here.'' Kris laughs, plugging his phone in for the night, and taking one of his night time blood thinners. ''Wondered when that was coming, I was hoping for earlier in the year, but now was as good a time as any, I suppose.''

Erik shuts his bedside light off, and lies down, still pondering what the hell happened today. ''Was it like that when Sid and Geno got together?''

Kris lies down himself. ''Kinda, Mario took Geno aside for a talk, and Gonch did the same with Sid. It wasn't the whole team, though. All I remember was them both coming back looking exactly as you do now.''

Erik chuckles, wishing he was around for that, but it would've been before he was drafted if his math is correct. ''Good to know this is a family thing. Might get Hedman to give you the talk, actually.'' Kris laughs, and kisses Erik on the lips, running his fingers through Erik's growing hair. ''I look forward to that.''

They finally get to sleep together, one of the strangest days of their relationship finally over.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Just something short and sweet for this plot bunny that's been living in my head for a week or so now. With some slight references to some past events, and plenty of found family dynamics involved. My TangerKarlsson magnum opus will forever be 'Rival Captains In Love' but, i think this has been fun to write in a different way.

Anyway, enjoy!

necessary tag: @tylerpitlicktruther

[reallyprofoundkryptonite]

Random little Kroggo heascanons for the soul.

Krogan is an UTTER idiot (heh, like me tbh) when it comes to romance. Viggo is literally his first romantic relationship EVER. And he probably had a bit of time realizing that he possibly maybe sort of liked Viggo as more than just a friend and had no clue how to state it to him without turning into a jumbled mess like a schoolboy who just got his first crush because Viggo has charisma (and is an absolutely oblivious fool.), he’s smart, handsome, rich. Everything that Krogan really isn’t, so Krogan keeps his feelings to himself until Viggo comes forwards and admits to him that he likes him as more than just a friend. (Even then Krogan is an utter mess about it. He is not very adept to flirting.’

It is funny because after a bit, Viggo finds out Krogan is an utter smooth fucker when it comes to flirting, which he hadn’t excepted considering how awkward Krogan was at first around him during the beginning of their relationship. Like full on , planned date nights that have more thought and care put into them than even just planning things against the dragon riders.

And Viggo finds Krogan’s autistic ramblings about his current hyperfixations (/pos) very cute and not to mention kind of hot. Krogan will oftentimes fall asleep standing over or leaning on Viggo’s shoulder as he tinkers with something or another, and Viggo will read to Krogan while he draws images of the characters in the books.

In some instances, when it comes down to affectation, Krogan is very much not very… affectionate. Not at first. He is extremely touch starved and loves it when Viggo washes his hair or even just rubs at his scalp and forehead. Rubbing at his forehead will instantly put him to sleep though, so. Viggo will oftentimes hum to Krogan as thry are cuddling to help him calm down, and Krogan did initially start crawling in bed with Viggo to fight off his nightmares.

[a-small-batch-of-dragons]

Spark

I request disabled Merlin! He hurt his leg and now he uses a cane sometimes when it gets bad. (this is all, can be a background detail in another fic!) - anon

Canon Era Lancelot and Merlin being roommates. I think they should get to be roommates. - anon

I humbly request a fic where Arthur learns some magic if you don't mind writing it. I think it'd be so fun in your style. - anon

I need gwaine and Arthur hurt/comfort (hurt arthur) to breathe and live please and thank you (/nm /pos) - anon

Read on Ao3

Warnings: none

Pairings: merthur, can be platonic or romantic you decide

Word Count: 2048

In the aftermath of one particular sorcerer's attack, Merlin is left to recover while Arthur contemplates how it feels to be so helpless against an enemy that threatens Merlin, Camelot, his people, and Merlin.

Gwaine and Lancelot both have some advice, but it's up to the two idiots to decide whether to take it or not.

    "Alright," Gwaine announces, pushing open Arthur's door with about as little ceremony as he throws his boots into a corner when he shucks them off, "that's enough sulking, Princess, we're all sick of it."

Arthur barely even looks up. Still in his armor, his sword laid across his knee, whetstone in hand. The slow shirking sound of sharpening metal fills the room as Gwaine sighs.

"Look, you going to tell me what's got you all sulky or am I just going to have to guess?"

"I have a feeling very little would stop you doing that." Arthur doesn't look up at this either. "So go ahead."

"Your boots not exactly as warm as they should be? The kitchen messing up and giving your blueberries instead of strawberries? Your red cloak with the silver studs is in the laundry so you had to wear the red one with the gold studs?"

Still sharpening the sword, Arthur huffs. "They're pewter, Gwaine, and I think we both know why I'm upset."

"Ah! So he admits it!" Even as Gwaine raises his hands in mock celebration, a twinge of worry plants itself in his chest as he hears Arthur actually admit he's worried about something. "Will wonders never cease? Pray tell, dear Prince, what it is that ails you?"

A pause, long enough for two more passes of the whetstone. Then: "Is Merlin alright?"

Gwaine stops, sitting down next to him. He sobers a little, leaning his weight on one knee. "Yeah. He's alright. Just a bit tired."

"Lancelot's with him?"

"Yeah, in their room." He looks over as Arthur's fingers flex. "You know, he'd probably share with you if you asked him."

Arthur doesn't respond to that, only sets the whetstone aside and reaches for a rage. Gwaine raises an eyebrow.

"Is this your way of telling Merlin he doesn't do a good enough job, or—"

"No."

The sudden ferocity in Arthur's voice gives Gwaine pause. He looks over again and sees the way Arthur grips the rag so tightly it almost whines under the pressure. He waits, watching Arthur take a deep breath.

"No," he repeats, more calmly this time, "it isn't. Merlin hasn't polished my sword in several weeks now."

It's not the time, Gwaine scolds himself, but really the fruit is hanging so low it's hard to see anything else.

"He's enough else to worry about," Arthur continues, oblivious—or perhaps willing to overlook—the thoughts running through Gwaine's head, "and it's one of the few of his tasks that I am capable of doing just fine on my own."

If it were another task, or perhaps if Arthur's hands had shaken less, Gwaine would've seized this low hanging-fruit instead, but as it stands, he simply nods. "Never thought I'd see the day where you admitted Merlin's better at something than you."

"Nonsense, I've called him a bigger fool than I am for years." It falls flat and they both know it. After another moment, Arthur sighs. "And…perhaps I'm just now learning the extent of Merlin's…duties."

Gwaine hums, looking at the floor too. "A one-man army, our Merlin is."

"Except armies aren't supposed to be one man," Arthur growls, "that's why they're armies. Groups, a team, men fighting alongside each other as brothers, as equals, how can—"

The rag does groan, the sword lying forgotten as Arthur closes his eyes.

"How can Merlin be an army," he says finally, "with no one else to support him?"

"He's got us," Gwaine says, "he's got you."

"But what can I do?" For not the first time, but the first time in a long while, disgust and shame color Arthur's face as he looks down at his sword. "I can't fight magic with a sword. There's only so much a prat in metal armor can do against the type of enemies that wish Merlin dead."

"I'd say we've proven that running any man through with a sword does work, magic or otherwise."

"That's not the point, Gwaine."

"I know." He shifts his weight, easing a cramp. "Why not learn some magic yourself?"

Now Arthur looks at him, although it is the same way one looks at a pig trying to fly. "Excuse me?"

"Merlin's born with magic, but most people aren't. They learn it. Gaius learned it, most of the people have magic items or things that give them magic, why not learn some of it yourself? That way when Merlin's off being all impressive we can do the little things that are the equivalent of sweeping the floor."

Arthur frowns. "Do the thing my father outlawed? Do the thing he killed people for? Do the very thing that is treason and would get me executed?"

"Yeah, that."

"Have you been drinking?"

"Stone cold sober." Arthur huffs, disbelieving, but Gwaine leans closer. "You said it yourself. Merlin's alone, and more often than not, he probably feels it because of how magic's talked about around here. If you showed that you were willing to learn, that you acknowledge the kind of pressure he's under, then maybe he won't feel it so much."

Arthur's quiet for a long moment, just looking at him, before he nods once. "Alright. I'll ask him."

"There you go."

"You know, you give good advice when you're sober. You should try it more."

"Oh?"

"Or I'll make you one of my advisors when I become King."

"Alright, alright, there's no need to threaten me."

***

Lancelot looks up when Merlin opens the door, putting his book down and pulling out a chair by the fireplace. "What?"

Merlin walks over, cane leaning against the cobbles. It topples over and he sits it back up. It topples over again and he sighs, eyes glowing as it goes back to its resting place and stays. Lancelot chuckles, helping Merlin set his leg on his knee and reaching for the oil.

"Arthur asked me to teach him magic today."

Lancelot's hands fumble momentarily with the oil. "He what?"

"Said he was 'just now learning' all the things I do—"

"Better late than never, I suppose."

"—right, and then asked if he could learn some easy to…"

The cork finally gives and Lancelot raises an eyebrow. "To…?"

"…'sweep the floor,' as it were, when we have to face magical threats."

Merlin sighs as Lancelot starts to massage his bad leg, head tilting back. From the warm glow of the fire, Lancelot can see how thin his face is becoming and the deep bags under his eyes. "What do you think of it?"

"I think I was tempted to go to Gaius and have him looked at."

Lancelot chuckles. "And then?"

"And then I wondered if it was a trick. To get me to show my magic so he could arrest me."

"I'd never let that happen, Merlin. None of the knights would. Morgana wouldn't."

"I know," comes the mulish reply, "I didn't think it for very long."

He gathers a bit more oil and works it in, focusing on a particularly stubborn knot as the fire crackles. After a moment, he looks up again. "Do you think you will?"

Merlin shifts. "I don't know. It would…it would be nice to have someone else with magic."

"Morgana—"

"Morgana does enough already."

"And you don't?" At his guilty shift, Lancelot sighs. "Merlin, Arthur's trying. In his own stubborn way, he's trying. You know that, right?"

"Of course I know it. Ow!"

"Sorry." He shifts his grip. "But then you know that means he's not asking because he wants the power or he doesn't know any better. He's asking to help you."

"I know."

"Who knows, maybe he'll be good at healing."

Merlin snorts. "Gaius would be proud."

"No prouder than he is of you, I'm sure."

"Shut up." But it's weak and undone by the way Merlin looks at him a moment later. "You think I should do it?"

"I think putting your faith in Arthur has served you well in the past," Lancelot replies, smiling softly, "as has my faith in you."

A small smile lifts the corner of his mouth. "Did Gwaine teach you that one?"

"Of course not. I taught him that one."

"You didn't."

Lancelot merely returns to massaging his leg.

"You didn't. Lancelot—wait, what else did you teach him?"

"I don't kiss and tell, Merlin."

"Oh, yes, you do, especially when it's to me. Now spill."

***

In the end, they decide to try a very simple spell first. Elemental magic is among one of the most dangerous, but its power is the easiest to tap into for beginners, so fire manipulation it is.

"Why didn't you just light the candle with magic?"

"Because you're not going to be able to do that for a while and I didn't want to get your hopes up."

Arthur pouts but nods, tapping his fingers on the table as Merlin steeples his fingers.

"Forbærne."

The flame rises, licking higher and higher, until it's almost the height of the window, before it resettles. Arthur's eyes widen as he watches and he lets out a slow breath that makes the flame wobble as he looks up at Merlin.

"…am I supposed to do that?"

"No, just make it grow a little."

Arthur narrows his eyes. "You wouldn't have happened to talk to Gwaine about why you chose this demonstration for our first lesson, did you?"

"No, why—oh."

"That's a no, then."

Merlin shakes his head. "Here, let's try this instead. Forbærne."

This time, instead of growing taller and taller, the flame flares brighter, changing into an almost golden color before resettling. Arthur frowns. "But you said the same thing."

"Magic isn't about one word translating to one effect, it's about translating what you want to happen into what will happen." When Arthur just blinks, he sighs. "I wanted it to burn a certain way so I used the word for 'burn.'"

"…let's start there."

Merlin nods to the candle. "Now. Find the part of you that understands why the fire burns and ask it to change."

"This sounds suspiciously like poetry."

"It is like poetry. No two men read the same poem the same way, no two magic users use magic the same way."

Arthur looks at him doubtfully before taking a deep breath and focusing on the candle. "Forbærne."

Nothing.

"Forbærne. Forbærne." He throws his hands up. "It's not working."

"You have to believe."

"I do believe, my hair near got scorched when you did it not ten seconds ago."

"But you have to believe you can do it." Merlin gestures between them. "You have to believe that the power will flow the direction you want it to when you ask it. You need to become a vessel to channel it. It won't just happen if you don't make yourself open to it."

"How do I do that, though? I've never—I don't—I don't understand magic."

"You do," Merlin says patiently, voice softening a little at the obvious distress in Arthur's voice, "you were born of it. Magic brought you into this world. It surrounds you, you're—you're closer to it than you think."

Arthur stares doubtfully at the candle flame.

"It's not a sword. You can't pick it up and put it down. It's part of you. You don't reach out and grab it, you open your hand and it fits there." Merlin pushes the candle a little closer to him. "You can do it."

Arthur closes his eyes. He takes another deep breath and something in his shoulders changes. When he opens his eyes again, the flame dances behind his eyes.

"Forbærne."

The candle flame flickers and glows a deep, warm red.

Arthur looks up at him in wonder and for a second, a bit of gold glows in his eyes too.

[cathumanthing2]

Roseblings Chatfic AU Chapter 7

magic bitches

2:45 am

actual wizard: fWhip i can hear your chanting pls stop trying to summon a demon in the house

tech wizard: oh thats not me

tech wizard: sausage and joey decided our house was a good place to summon a demon for some reason

blood sheep man: It has  the perfect amount of space! Plus the negative energy will attract the demons better!

actual wizard: …what's that supposed to mean?

blood sheep man: Oh, nothing!

plant flower faerie: Anyways has anyone heard from shrub? They usually stay up this late on weekends.

glitter starboy: nope

tech wizard: me neither 

jungle bitch: nah

scary fish lady: Nope :P 

blood sheep man: No, but I have seen a demon!

short pottery man: Nah bro

buff buff farmer: Sadly, no, I have not seen the idiot/pos gnome

Father: I cannot say I have. Why do you ask, Katherine?

pathetic fish man: I don't think they're anywhere rn, really

plant flower faerie: aww, I was gonna ask them if they wanted to go watch a movie or something tommorrow

father: Finally.

buff buff farmer: shes ready to stop being an oblivious sapphic idiot

actual wizard: Now the only ones we need to get to stop being idiots are fwhip, jimmy, and scott

blood sheep man: You forgot Pix

actual wizard: Wait why pix?

father: Sausage. If you tell her, I am going to commit several acts against the law. 

plant flower faerie: What the heck are you guys talking about??

buff buff farmer: we spoke too soon

plant farmer faerie: Still tho where's shrub

fungi fungus gnome: Yall talking about me?

plant flower faerie: Oh, shrub! Wanna go tomorrow to see a movie or something?

fungi fungus gnome: oh ofc!

father: I would rejoice but you guys are still being idiotic

plant flower faerie: WHAT THE HELL DO YOU MEAN-

jungle bitch: unrelated but scott i accidentally summoned your hot sibling

glitter starboy: Joey i will fucking murder you if you kiss them

jungle bitch: too late

jungle bitch: hi this is xornoth i can confirm joey is a good kisser

glitter starboy: im going to cry

father: Everyone please go to sleep now I'm getting a headache from your guy's sleep deprivation.

Scott & Sausage

3:34 am

Sausage: scott

Scott: Hmm?

Sausage: I wanted to tell you something

Scott: what

Sausage: nevermind actually

braincell + idiot

3:45 am

idiot: Pearl i ALMOSt did it

braincell: Did what

idiot: Told scott

braincell: Woohoo!!

braincell: One step closer

braincell: But why do you keep going to me for advice im literally aroace im not gonna be able to give you anything good

idiot: exactly

idiot: I need an outside perspective, plus ur my bestie and your good at knowing what to do

braincell: ok soos now pls let me sleep

idiot: Ok I'm gonna keep summoning demons :D 

braincell: Have fun don't get hurt

magic bitches

3:58 am

father: Go to sleep or I'm going to hunt you down and murder your entire family.

tech wizard: GEEZ PIX WHAT THE FUCK

actual wizard: I dont think he's joking too-

father: Especially you Gem. Your exhaustion and burnout is easily smellable from a mile away.

actual wizard: The heck is that supposed to mean?

father: You know what I mean. Stop being an idiot and sleep.

father: That goes for the readers as well. Sleep. I can sense your sleep deprivation.

tech wizard: hold up wait who gave you the ability to break the 4th wall??

father: The author. Who also needs to sleep. I am fighting the urge to scream in their ears as we speak.

blood sheep man: Ok first what

blood sheep man: second I'm sleeping now

actual wizard: I am confused and am now going to sleep in the hopes my mind will be able to figure it out in the morning

father: Good. Now everyone else, sleep or suffer the consequences.

[zukoromantic]

for the ship opinion bingo, how about narumitsu and krisnix (the ships that immediately came to my mind) OH and marigami!!

NARUMITSU...... Can't believe you wanna see that......

I have written. So much analysis on them. They mean so much to me like the world and i am not hyperfixated on them anymore and i had some difficult feelings and actual heartbreak due to the 7yr gap but...... Still man!!!! Codependant vaguely bc especially phoenix was so dependant but they literally worked on this so they actually become healthier but it is still insane to me how they were in aa1. Not dating but married nonetheless is for before they are dating to me and ALSO regardless of if they are dating or not. They are simply married no matter the ship status. The thematically delicious is bc their writing literally makes me so insane in every way. When i see people do regular tropes with them i get so confused because they are literally not some rando ship not to me, their writing and relationship is so good and special and unique and i don't understand how you would. Ignore all of this. ("Idiots in love" "Oblivious pining" WHAT. THEY /KNOW/. THEY KNOW. This isn't a silly school crush thing, this is two insane people being everything but normal about each other. No matter if romantically or not.) The worst in each other is bc they just naturally do this throughout the trilogy and yet it Works. They shouldn't work but they really really do. The inherent eroticism of character development.....

I just think their writing is excellent and they bring me immense joy. I think they are sooo special no matter if one sees them romantically or not, but to me they are so romance for personal reasons ;;

---

Krisnix, my god:

SO INSALEY FUN ON GOD 😭😭🙏 Absolutely messed up but also hilarious. Was so hooked even before starting aa4 and then we played the first case and i was like. THEY JUST. ARE REALLY LIKE THIS. It's insane it's insane it's insane "we dine together rather frequently" stfu/pos😭. They ruin each other on real and i haven't even played past the second case yet so i'm looking forward to seeing kristoph again i know it'll be a BLAST he's so funny. Not having played the full game yet is the only reason that the making me insane thing is only half. And also, i am not 100% sure yet on the codepency thing bc haven't finished but they do give that vibe and i think that's a great interpretation of them

---

MARIGAMIIIIIII I LOVE THEM SM ;;;;

They mean so much to me they're so damn cute, also me and my gf are really still advocating for adrimarigami in the year of 2023 huh 😭💔 Would have solved so many issues, they're too powerful. But marigami on its own is also so ;;;❤️

[sleeplessinspace]

Aaaaa I’m so glad you liked my Monster!Murdock thoughts I have SO MANY of em-

The monster generates a lot of tourism for the area, even though not many people have actually seen it. Lots of statues and stuff around town. Themed restaurants. It’s a real problem for him, because if he were to move away and the monster vanished and reappeared elsewhere, he’d definitely get caught, and he’s definitely been killing in his other form (locals, rude tourists, he’s not picky). It’s the perfect alibi! That or he just got hungry, and the woods are full of amateur cryptid hunters who think they’ll get rich and famous for catching another blurry video of him (no thanks).

I think he has a little bnb out in the woods just to generate some income. He lives in the basement and cooks for his guests sometimes jk he’s just trying to flirt with the reader via good food. that’s how you woo people right. The reader says they wouldn’t mind living in the house permanently and he gets heart eyes under those stupid shades of his. Affectionately I would like to punt this man into a wall, stupid idiot gets a crush on his tenant, how UNPROFESSIONAL,

Sfhjgfd he does the most wild shit because Creature and the reader just. Accepts it. He’s vacuuming and picks up the entire couch with them on it and they’re just ‘wow, he could be an Olympic lifter! That’s so neat!’ And continue on with their day. He always realizes he’s slipped up like an hour later and panics for several more hours until he realizes they didn’t notice/have a strange explanation for everything. He prefers the latter because he likes hearing how their brain works (even if it is totally ridiculous)

- trying to get these ideas somewhat coherent, 🐈

moar CRECHUR YES i too would like to punt this idiot into a wall, such a LOSER /aff

why is the combination of oblivious!reader and losing his touch because he likes them so much!murdock so cute godddd my heart. he slips up a lot and reader just... does notice a damn thing. love these idiots /pos

also the thought of him owning a cozy bnb in the woods is so,,,warm

[dandyshucks]

1300 words of Guz being a goofy goober about his feelings for Junebug ∑ദ്ദി˙◡･)

~

Guzma drags his hand through his hair, growling in frustration.

Plumeria laughs, though not unkindly. “Guz, what's the issue, man? You're being a fucking clod about this.”

He growls again, and gestures with both hands. “They're just so goddamn soft!”

“I thought you liked that,” she says with a smirk.

“I do! It's just -” he groans, pacing back and forth. “How do I do this, y'know? They're too fuckin’ soft and I'm a big fuckin’ brute who's gonna end up hurtin’em! I don't think they even like me like that. And honestly, I don't blame ‘em.” He sinks into a chair with a sigh, covering his face with both hands.

“I'm gonna be honest with you, alright?”

“Shoot."

“You're being a fucking idiot right now.”

Guzma scoffs. “If you were me, you'd be feeling this exact same way.”

“Okay, fair, but I'm not you. I can see the situation clearly, and I can clearly see you're being unbelievably thick about this.”

“Y’just don't get it, Plumes."

She snorts. “Yeah, sure. I'm the one who's lost here.”

Sinking further into the chair, he bemoans, “I just don't think I got any shot at this. You're right, I'm a big fuckin’ numbskull and I'm gonna fuck this all up!”

“Guzma,” she says, rolling her eyes and standing up, “I didn't say you're going to fuck things up. You will if you keep acting stupid like this, but even then I don't think Juno’s going to leave. Have you seen how they act around you? They light up like a goddamn Lanturn when they see you! Half the team has caught onto it by now, oblivious as they all are.” She sighs. “Honestly I'd just appreciate if you got this over with so I can stop getting on everyone's asses about leaving you two the hell alone. You know how many threats I've had to dole out the past couple months?”

The man's face flushes. “Fuck,” he says, rubbing at the back of his neck. “M’sorry, Plumes.”

“You should be.” She places a hand on her hip, staring down at him, one eyebrow raised. “So what's the plan?”

He sighs. “I don't think I can do it.”

Plumeria’s head falls back and she groans. “You're fucking killing me!”

He protests, “I just don't think they like me like that! They probably just like me as the team’s boss! I mean, who wouldn't get excited about spendin’ time with ya boy! I'm a goddamn delight!”

“Guzma, you literally just told me how you're a huge idiot.”

“A delightful idiot!”

She pinches the bridge of her nose. “You're the most annoying person I've ever met.”

“And yet, you love me,” he says, crossing his arms behind his head and leaning back, composure restored.

Shaking her head with a smile, she pulls one of the chairs over to sit on, facing Guzma head-on. “How about this: you tell me exactly why this wouldn't work, and I'll tell you just how stupid you're being.”

“Ain't that what we've been doing?”

“Let's get into specifics here. Tell me exactly why this wouldn't work.” She leans forward, elbows on her knees.

Guzma huffs. “Aight, aight.” He brings his arms down, unconsciously mirroring her position, nervously wringing his hands. “It wouldn't work because… well, I said it earlier, didn't I? I'm a big brutish idiot and they're this soft little….” He searches for the right word. “They’re like a sweet little Cutiefly and I'm some clumsy ass Kleavor!”

Plumeria resists the urge to laugh. Guzma and his bug-types….

“All the people I've had flings with, y'know, they've all been these kinda shitty tourists who just want a taste of something big and bad, and I can give ‘em that, easy. It's fun, sure, and I know they're gonna leave in a couple weeks so I'll never have to see ‘em again. So it doesn't matter if I end up being a stupid jerk. They expect it anyway; that's what they're lookin’ for, right? Just helps keep up the reputation of Team Skull, buncha scary thugs just taking what they want when they want it.” He exhales, looking off to the side with a frown. “And then along comes this shy little trainer, lost outside Po Town in the dark, and they're so fuckin’ soft, Plumes. They're different from anyone I ever seen around here, y'know? Warmer or something.” He chuckles. “Stupid thing to say maybe, considerin’ Sinnoh’s so fuckin’ cold. Did ya know they got a couple spots over there that have snow all year?” He shakes his head, eyebrows raised. “Fucking wild.”

Plumeria smiles, tilting her head. “Alright, so they're different from your one- or two-night stands. That's pretty obvious. But what's so difficult about them being different? Honestly, I'd say it's a massive improvement.”

Guzma huffs out a laugh. “Yeah, yeah, I know, I know. I know ya don't like the tourists I've brought in. I don't even like ‘em half the time, but they were good for a bit of easy fun.” He pauses, face turning to something like disgust, before shaking himself out and sitting up. “That ain't happening anymore, though. I'm done with all that, at least as long as Juno’s around.”

“You haven't answered my question.”

“I was getting there!” Plumeria raises an eyebrow, and Guzma rolls his eyes. “It's difficult, cuz now I care. There. Happy? Ya boy cares about someone other than himself, ooh, shock and awe.”

She smiles and says, “I know you care about people, Guz. I see it with the team. And I know you care about me, you knucklehead.” She punches his knee lightly. “I don't think you have anything to worry about, though. Have you really not seen how Juno acts around you compared to the rest of us?”

Guzma smiles wrily. “But I'm the boss, y'know? ‘Course they're gonna act different around me. The grunts act different around me an’ you than how they act when they think I'm not looking.”

Plumeria drags a hand down her face. “But Juno doesn't act like they're talking to a fucking workplace manager, Guzma. They act like you're a safe haven, like you're some sort of guardian angel.”

He makes a strangled noise, and his face flushes again. “That ain't right, they don't think all that,” he sputters.

“I didn't say I know what they're thinking!” She throws her hands into the air in exasperation. “But I have a pretty damn good idea just from the way they look at you!”

Guzma rubs his cheek, looking off to the side, trying to hide his face from his best friend. “They wouldn't think that,” he mumbles, muffled by his hand.

“You're exhausting me, bud. I'm going to say it one more time and then I have to go make sure Tupp and Zipp aren't setting fire to something they shouldn't be. I assume you heard they got their hands on a Torkoal a couple days ago?” At his blank expression, she lets out a long suffering sigh. “Whatever, I'll deal with it.” She stands up and stretches languidly. Looking back down at him, she says, “Here's the deal: Juno likes you, dude. It's really, really obvious. And the rest of the team is going to start being real obnoxious about it if you don't act quick to break this tension the two of you have going on. I can only keep them behaving for so long.”

At this, Guzma slumps in his chair. He stays quiet.

“You're going to have to deal with this at some point,” Plumeria says, before walking out of the room. “Might as well make it soon!” she calls over her shoulder.

Guzma groans loudly at her in response, before raising a hand to his cheek again. It's still warm, he's still flushed. Fuck. He lays his head down on the table beside him, arms folded under his forehead, obscuring his face from anyone who might walk in. Successfully hidden away, he finally lets himself smile, feeling giddy at the thought that maybe, just maybe, Juno feels the same way about him.

AND THEN HE STILL DOESNT SAY ANYTHING TO JUNEBUG FOR ANOTHER COUPLE MONTHS. SOBBING.