#oh my god it's 4:21am

[jeon-ify]

that night : j. yunho - pt. 1

a/n: this is my first actual fic since i’ve just been posting scenarios and requests :3 !! this idea came from listening to ‘you broke me first’ by tate mcrae. its a great song and it reminds me of yunho but toxic yunho. it would kinda be good if you listen to the song while reading !! idk girl i just write

genre: smut, drama, early 20s- mid 20s romance, toxic/dark romance, 18+

warnings: smut, dark romance, toxic!yunho, yunho has a threesome with y/n’s best friends, yunho is a cheater, reader swears a lot, yunho calls reader a psychotic bitch, san is a druggie, alcohol, cocaine, yunho begs, yunho gets sad and guilty, reader claims she moved on, san is annoying as hell, wooyoung is readers bestie!!

“san! i haven’t talked to you in so long, i’m sorry! how have you been?” your phone rang, you look to see that san called you about 20 times. you’ve been ignoring him, since he’s done almost every drug under the sun in the past year since you all have moved to different cities.

“man I called you 6 times. stop playing dumb. yunho’s asking about you again, please call him back. i’m sick of his shit.” san sniffles sharply. you’re sure he’s doing crack again, but when is he not?

you did not want to hear about yunho. you haven’t heard about or seen him in almost 4 years now, recovering from that night.

~~~~~~~~~~~

you call yunho, in hopes that he’d pick up. you left him a voicemail asking if he’d want anything from target when you were off work tonight.

*hello!! it’s yunho, sorry i couldn’t take your call. leave a message and i’ll call back!*

“i’m gonna stop at target, babe. did you want anything? love you, call me back.”

you finish your target run, grabbing a set of shampoo and conditioner and other necessities as you’ve been out of your favorites for a week now. you step out of the car, grabbing your bags and unlocking the door to yunhos apartment. you didn’t live with him, but you practically did since you were there almost every day of the week.

“~yuyu, fuck its so good! so big!” “you fuck us so good oh my god.”

“you’re both so fuckin’ pretty. my god.”

no fucking way.

your heart dropped to your ass, at a loss of every word in the dictionary. you felt like you were being run over by a truck 100 times over.

it felt like every moment with yunho was flashing at once.

he told you he loved you a million times a minute, you thought you were the only one. you thought that yunho would love you and only you, but how could you be so stupid to trust anyone else again?

you walk to where the noise is coming from, tears flooding your eyes, threatening to fall. the door is cracked a little, you see a pile of black hair and red hair mixed, one on top of the other. one of the girls has a tattoo on her wrist while the other has one too— it looks all too familiar.

one tattoo being a moon, the other being a sun.

your best friends.

you want to cut off the star tattoo on your wrist so fucking bad. how could they ever betray you like this? they never approved of yunho, but he’s inside both of them, fucking them on your shared bed. in your (what was once) home.

you didn’t even want to acknowledge the situation, instead you dropped the target bag at the door of the bedroom, leaving as soon as you could.

hours later, yunho calls. no answer.

you stare as your phone rings.

*32 missed calls from yuyu 🫶🏻✨*

yuyu 🫶🏻✨: hey, sry i didn’t call back. where’d u go?

yuyu 🫶🏻✨: babe?

yuyu 🫶🏻✨: y/n, pick up the phone.

yuyu 🫶🏻✨: not funny.

Read at 12:43AM

yuyu 🫶🏻✨: ur reading my fkn messages but ur not answering n its pissing me off

yuyu 🫶🏻✨: alr whatever lmao dnt pick up.

Today at 5:21AM

yuyu 🫶🏻✨: i cnt sleep, thibkin about yoj

*2 missed calls from yuyu 🫶🏻✨*

you watch your phone ring, waiting for the ringing to stop. your tears flow, deciding to call him back.

“baby? my fucking god, i mis-missed you. *hiccup* had me worried sick.” he slurs. he’s fucking crying.?

“you’re a fucking liar. my best friends? you’re drinking, you piece of shit. and you’re fucking crying?”

“relax, they’re not your best friends and i know that cus they did that to you, plus me and you baby, we don’t belong to each other. been wanting to leave. felt so fucking locked up. you won’t let me do what i want, you controlling fucking psychotic bitch.”

what the fuck.?

you watch the time on the phone call increase as he mumbles what you really meant to him.

you feel like you really did trap him, but you both didn’t agree on a poly relationship. for him to fuck your best friends is an insane thing to do to someone.

you end the phone call after 57 minutes of yunho talking about how much he fucking hated you for never letting him fuck your friends.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“i’m never talking to that piece of shit again and never bring him up to me. i have things to do, i’ll text you.”

you hung up the phone after 35 seconds.

you’ve grown past the situation with yunho, healing and becoming a better person. you were single, traumatized from your past relationships being a burden on you. but, your best friend wooyoung always supported you through and through. he wanted what was best for you, even though he introduced you to yunho. it wasn’t wooyoungs fault that yunho had fucked up (or was already fucked up), he just wanted to help you find someone. you had your own apartment, your own car and your own lash studio. you were booked for days on end, always working and being your own person.

but, with healing comes pain.

you’d occasionally think about yunho, how he’d pamper you in gifts and he’d take you anywhere you wanted. you thought about the nights that you’d cried to him, he’d hold you in his warm chest, making sure you were held and you didn’t feel alone. you sometimes still toss around in bed, thinking yunho was next to you, on your right side. you’d still bake matcha and white chocolate cookies as if he’d eat them with you, a reminder that you loved yunho— as your love language was baking— and every time you see those cookies, your heart begins to ache.

you pick up your phone and text your best friend, as he’s the only person you go to for anything.

—————-

to: woo 🧍🏻‍♀️

y/n: bitch get up

y/n: r u awake yet

y/n: GET THE FUCK UP BRO ITS AN EMERGENCY

y/n: if ur not up in the nect 5 minutes i’m calling the cips

y/n: next *^ & cops^*

y/n: man i just need to talk 😩 san called me

*seen*

woo 🧍🏻‍♀️: girl what the FUCK

woo 🧍🏻‍♀️: did u call the cops yet

woo 🧍🏻‍♀️: is the cop hot

woo 🧍🏻‍♀️: bitch WHI CALLED

woo 🧍🏻‍♀️: im calling u rn answer

your best friend calls you in no less than 3 minutes after your series of texts.

“why is san calling you? what’d he want?” wooyoung asks, concern masking his voice.

“woo, i just started feeling like i finally moved on from all that bullshit. he fucking calls me like ‘oh yunho wants to talk to you’ and i’ve been dodging yunho for fucking ever. i know he’s been calling me but-“ you ramble to him. he cuts you off, questioning:

“did you ask him what he wanted from you?”

“it doesn’t matter because im over it and im over fucking everything. its all bad news and i don’t wanna go down that hole again, woo. if you’re so curious ask him yourself. i don’t care and i honestly don’t wanna know.”

“okay. i won’t ask.” wooyoung says in defense. he has a sixth sense, and his sense is telling him that maybe something is wrong with yunho, or maybe he wants to try to give you the closure you deserve. though he already gave you closure— just not the kind you expected from someone you’ve loved for 6 years.

but a part of you really wanted to know why he called. a little portion of your heart still aches for yunho, but you’re healing, remember?

the phone call ends after small talk, and you stare at yunho’s contact info for 7 minutes. you open messages and read the last message he sent you. you have him blocked, but you know it’s his number.

May 19th, 2021 at 3:21AM

*You have new messages from (***)***-**** *

(***)***-****: baby, i’m so sorry.

(***)***-****: you won’t ever forgive me, but i’ve changed. my star, my love, my moon, my sun.

(***)***-****: i can’t sleep anymore.

(***)***-****: i’ll leave you alone, okay?

December 10th, 2022 at 1:21AM

(***)***-****: i can’t live without you.

(***)***-****: it’s been so fucking long

(***)***-****: js need to see ur face. keep staring at the same pic but it was so long ago

(***)***-****: my messages are green, why are they green?

(***)***-****: i met someone today, his name started with an M but i can’t remember what his name was

(***)***-****: he’s helping me heal. ik i don’t deserve to heal but i wanna be better bc u deserve better

(***)***-****: i wanna be the one for u my love

(***)***-****: i fucked up but pls believe me when i say i’ll change for u bb

(***)***-****: i’m going to sleep, goodnight my angel

January 8, 2023 at 7:08PM

(***)***-****: everythibg remjnds me of u baby

(***)***-****: ur everywhere i go

(***)***-****: ur everything i see

(***)***-****: mingi won’t let me live diwn what i did to u

(***)***-****: i deserve to fucking die

(***)***-****: i really lost u

Today at 10:32PM

(***)***-****: i still miss you, my love.

(***)***-****: want you to carry my children and be in my life forever.

(***)***-****: i’ve bettered myself. i’ve changed, please let me see you again.

*seen*

shortly after you open his book of messages, your phone rings.

*2 missed calls from (***)***-**** *

———————

you watch your phone ring twice, your heart dropping 6 times over, you didn’t think he would be this bad about it, but maybe he aches for you the same way you ache for him.

maybe yunho is sorry. maybe he changed and maybe he wants to be with you again.

your phone rings again, the same phone number showing up, as your shaky hands press the green button.

silence. the first 8 seconds is silent as yunho tries to process and come up with what he’ll say to you.

he tried calling you for 3 years on end, you’d blocked him. he was so used to your voicemail being the only thing left of you to heal him.

“h-hello?” there it is. the voice you refused to hear for almost 4 years, its there. it’s no longer only in your head, it’s his voice on the other side of the 7 inch screen against your ear.

his voice makes your stomach twist and turn, your hands sweating as your chest forms a hole within itself.

“you don’t need to say anything, just listen to me, hm? you can hang up any second you want, but if your heart still aches for me the way mine does for you, you’d listen.

my love. i’ve ruined you and tore you to shreds. i don’t even know where i begin. you are the most precious thing that has ever happened to me. the minute you entered my life, i took you for granted and fucked up. i didn’t realize how much i loved you or how much you meant to me until you left. that night is a blur to me, you didn’t deserve any of that. you deserve to be treated like royalty, you deserve to be treated in the most beautiful and enchanting way because that is how you made me feel. but i went and fucked that up for the both of us. i didn’t mean what i said to you. i was drunk but that’s no excuse to talk to you the way i did. it’s not right. it never was.

the only time i ever find myself doing right is when i beat myself up for doing you wrong.

i stay at the same apartment, san comes over and does whatever he needs to do but i haven’t touched a drug since you left me. the minute you left was the minute i decided to better myself. mingi is helping me be the person i want to be for you. my god, i hate myself for everything ive done to you. i’m not asking for your forgiveness, i know you won’t give it to me. but i want you to know that i still am here and i still love you. i love you better and i love you the way you deserve.

are you still with me, y/n?”

he breathes. you breathe. you finally breathe.

“i- yunho. i don’t know how to feel about any of this, you really hurt me and i can’t trust anyone anymore. you fucked my best friends, in our room. i don’t even know why i even looked at my phone or why i even answered san when he called me. i’m doing better, but you calling me again is really making me feel like i’m falling down that hole again.” you try your hardest to not let him hear you grow weak to his confession. his heart caved in, and his stomach grew empty when you’d brought up his mistake.

“i understand. i won’t push or do anything to make you uncomfortable. but, i want to have coffee with you, or one of us can come over and we can talk about this, hm?”

you sigh. you felt like all the healing and all the self care you’ve been doing is going straight down the drain.

but do you wanna listen to what he has to say?

“i’m free tomorrow afternoon. but i can’t stay long.” is all you say. you don’t wanna keep this conversation going, nor do you even want to talk about this at all. you are growing selfish; only wanting to see yunho because you miss the attention you used to get from him.

“as long as i get to see you, its okay. i look forward to talking to you, y/n. been waiting forever. is 4:30 fine with you?” he sniffles and lets out a calm chuckle from within his throat.

he’s aching just as much as you are.

“yes. goodnight, yunho.”

“goodnight, star.” that nickname. the same nickname that dragged you into his lore. he speaks lightly. the phone call ends and he sounds like an angel, making your head spin and your heart confused.

you don’t know whether to trust yunho again because, maybe, he is sorry. maybe he wants to make things right with you.

for the rest of the night, you cannot sleep. you don’t decide on going tomorrow, you really don’t want to face yunho after what he did to you. after 4 hours of tossing and turning, rereading texts from yunho, drinking water, and listening to nothing but the buzzing in your ear, you finally manage to get sleep.

—————————————————————————————

first fic!! yay!! i know yall are gonna hate yunho because what he did to y/n is trash and ass and all of the above. i hope you guys start to understand yunho further in the story. idk what im gonna do with this fic but i hope i come up with part 2 in a timely manner cus i dont want it to be dragged lol. but!!!!!!!!!! i hope you all like this fic just as much as i HATE it 😋

[aemonded]

Hi! I’ve been following you for a lil lil bit, but already you seem super smart and knowledgeable so.. what are some books or other pieces of writing you think everyone should read? Have a lovely day!

B’aww, thank you! <3 You too nonnie! <3

Just off the top of my head at three o’clock in the morning, and the qualification that you provided that its something that ‘everyone should read,’ I’m going to go for more books that I found changed me fundamentally, as a person, after reading them. That may be a self-help book; that might be a societal critique, that might be a work of classic literature. I tried to give a bit of everything. <3

 I’ll put a little copy-and-paste synopsis here for you for each book, and will elaborate if necessary in brackets. 

BEHOLD: LAUREN’S LIST OF LITERARY RECOMMENDATIONS:

From My (Non-Law) Bookcase (But still are about political issues):

Rage Becomes Her: The Power of Women’s Anger by Soraya Chemaly: 

‘As women, we’ve been urged for so long to bottle up our anger, letting it corrode our bodies and minds in ways we don’t even realize. Yet there are so, so many legitimate reasons for us to feel angry, ranging from blatant, horrifying acts of misogyny to the subtle drip, drip drip of daily sexism that reinforces the absurdly damaging gender norms of our society. In Rage Becomes Her, Soraya Chemaly argues that our anger is not only justified, it is also an active part of the solution. We are so often encouraged to resist our rage or punished for justifiably expressing it, yet how many remarkable achievements would never have gotten off the ground without the kernel of anger that fueled them? Approached with conscious intention, anger is a vital instrument, a radar for injustice and a catalyst for change. On the flip side, the societal and cultural belittlement of our anger is a cunning way of limiting and controlling our power—one we can no longer abide.’

Academic Ableism: Disability and Higher Education by Jay T. Dolmage:

‘Academic Ableism brings together disability studies and institutional critique to recognize the ways that disability is composed in and by higher education, and rewrites the spaces, times, and economies of disability in higher education to place disability front and center. For too long, argues Jay Timothy Dolmage, disability has been constructed as the antithesis of higher education, often positioned as a distraction, a drain, a problem to be solved. The ethic of higher education encourages students and teachers alike to accentuate ability, valorize perfection, and stigmatize anything that hints at intellectual, mental, or physical weakness, even as we gesture toward the value of diversity and innovation. Examining everything from campus accommodation processes, to architecture, to popular films about college life, Dolmage argues that disability is central to higher education, and that building more inclusive schools allows better education for all.’

(This book strays into more academic categories, but it’s still really great that this sort of book is being written. I personally recognise its value as someone with mental health struggles and who has had to fight ironically in the legal sphere for myself in terms of finding support within my own career moving forward as a lawyer/legal academic. I think the fact that the narrative that disabilities are seen as the antithesis of secondary education despite claims of diversity is something that all university students need to guard themselves against, or at least educate themselves on, in order to work against some systems that even though they espouse equality, might not have their best interests at heart. 

I’ve ironically found this especially terrible in law, where my first term of law school I was told ‘girls like you don’t go to law school,’ followed by constant questioning by the community at large after graduate that any hint of mental weakness equates to being unfit to practice law. This is despite the majority of lawyers having mental health problems, if not full blown addictions. It’s honestly why I’m pivoting back to academia (law prof), or moving to practice for the government (which enforces union restrictions on how long a lawyer can actually work, where firms just actually work them to death without union protections ironically; ugh. My whole point is, I’m not ashamed of having mental health problems in a field largely categorised by achievements in secondary education. I feel no reason to hide it, even though people tell me to. If someone is ashamed of me over something I had no control over developing, then I probably don’t want to be involved with them, do I? (A good method I recommend; it may cut off some superficial ‘friends’/’opportunities,’ but it leads to those who truly understand what a mental health disability may entail, and how strong you are for overcoming it).

White Fragility: Why It’s so Hard to for White People to Talk about Racism by Robin DiAngelo:

The New York Times best-selling book exploring the counterproductive reactions white people have when their assumptions about race are challenged, and how these reactions maintain racial inequality.

In this “vital, necessary, and beautiful book” (Michael Eric Dyson), antiracist educator Robin DiAngelo deftly illuminates the phenomenon of white fragility and “allows us to understand racism as a practice not restricted to ‘bad people’ (Claudia Rankine). Referring to the defensive moves that white people make when challenged racially, white fragility is characterized by emotions such as anger, fear, and guilt, and by behaviors including argumentation and silence. These behaviors, in turn, function to reinstate white racial equilibrium and prevent any meaningful cross-racial dialogue. In this in-depth exploration, DiAngelo examines how white fragility develops, how it protects racial inequality, and what we can do to engage more constructively.

Two Mental Health-Related Books:

Do Nothing: How to Break Away from Overworking, Overdoing, and Underliving by Celeste Headlee:

‘We work feverishly to make ourselves happy. So why are we so miserable?

Despite our constant search for new ways to optimize our bodies and minds for peak performance, human beings are working more instead of less, living harder not smarter, and becoming more lonely and anxious. We strive for the absolute best in every aspect of our lives, ignoring what we do well naturally and reaching for a bar that keeps rising higher and higher. Why do we measure our time in terms of efficiency instead of meaning? Why can’t we just take a break?

In Do Nothing, award-winning journalist Celeste Headlee illuminates a new path ahead, seeking to institute a global shift in our thinking so we can stop sabotaging our well-being, put work aside, and start living instead of doing. As it turns out, we’re searching for external solutions to an internal problem. We won’t find what we’re searching for in punishing diets, productivity apps, or the latest self-improvement schemes. Yet all is not lost - we just need to learn how to take time for ourselves, without agenda or profit, and redefine what is truly worthwhile.

Pulling together threads from history, neuroscience, social science, and even paleontology, Headlee examines long-held assumptions about time use, idleness, hard work, and even our ultimate goals. Her research reveals that the habits we cling to are doing us harm; they developed recently in human history, which means they are habits that can, and must, be broken. It’s time to reverse the trend that’s making us all sadder, sicker, and less productive, and return to a way of life that allows us to thrive.’

(I just read this book lately and I love it; it’s really follows the history of how we’ve come to this point where we can’t shut off our brains, and we see ourselves in this really puritanical, commercialist manner: How we define ourselves by how much we produce, and if we fall short of this goal by being (ironically) human, we berate ourselves for it. This really has let me shift my mentality towards a much healthier, less ‘workaholic’ mode in my COVID downtime, and really helped me move towards a healthier lifestyle in the jobs I’m searching for now that I’ve left school. Recommended for anyone taking the big leap into the full time work world).

Chained to the Desk by Bryan Robinson:

‘Americans love a hard worker. The worker who toils eighteen-hour days and eats meals on the run between appointments is usually viewed with a combination of respect and awe. But for many, this lifestyle leads to family problems, a decline in work productivity, and ultimately to physical and mental collapse. Intended for anyone touched by what Robinson calls “the best-dressed problem of the twenty-first century,” Chained to the Desk provides an inside look at workaholism’s impact on those who live and work with work addicts—partners, spouses, children, and colleagues—as well as the appropriate techniques for clinicians who treat them. Originally published in 1998, this groundbreaking book from best-selling author and widely respected family therapist Bryan E. Robinson was the first comprehensive portrait of the workaholic. In this new and fully updated third edition, Robinson draws on hundreds of case reports from his own original research and years of clinical practice. The agonies of workaholism have grown all the more challenging in a world where the computer, cell phone, and iPhone allow twenty-four-hour access to the office, even on weekends and from vacation spots. Adult children of workaholics describe their childhood pain and the lifelong legacies they still carry, and the spouses or partners of workaholics reveal the isolation and loneliness of their vacant relationships. Employers and business colleagues discuss the cost to the company when workaholism dominates the workplace. Chained to the Desk both counsels and consoles. It provides a step-by-step guide to help readers spot workaholism, understand it, and recover.’

(I also just read this one, and it’s an older book edited to a third edition, and it shows. However, it also does the important work of demonstrating how workaholics should be treated in the same category as anyone else who gets any sort of ‘high’ from something, like drugs or alcoholism. It opens with the quote (and I’m paraphrasing here), “Workaholicism is the best dressed addiction.” It’s the one we’re rewarded for constantly, not matter what mental toll it takes on us. While I’m not exactly ready to sign up for a twelve-step plan (and some of the chapters are specifically for spouses and children), it still dishes out some really good advice about feeding other areas of our lives and how to not simply focus on work.)

From My Undergraduate Degree (Classics and Double Minor in English and German Literature, with a little World Literature thrown in for good measure):

Things Fall Apart by Chinua Achebe: 

THINGS FALL APART tells two overlapping, intertwining stories, both of which center around Okonkwo, a “strong man” of an Ibo village in Nigeria. The first of these stories traces Okonkwo's fall from grace with the tribal world in which he lives, and in its classical purity of line and economical beauty it provides us with a powerful fable about the immemorial conflict between the individual and society. The second story, which is as modern as the first is ancient, and which elevates the book to a tragic plane, concerns the clash of cultures and the destruction of Okonkwo's world through the arrival of aggressive, proselytizing European missionaries. These twin dramas are perfectly harmonized, and they are modulated by an awareness capable of encompassing at once the life of nature, human history, and the mysterious compulsions of the soul. THINGS FALL APART is the most illuminating and permanent monument we have to the modern African experience as seen from within.

(This is a classic of African Literature, and what I wrote my world literature paper on in first year. It really is a story about the affect of a fall of one culture, where Okonkwo is the prime example of what a ‘man’ may be in this society, to how this society (and African societies as a whole) are affected by European colonialism. How one man can be seen as a paradigm of perfection at one point in time, and the scourge of the earth at another, when he stubbornly holds to his ideals, no matter how flawed they may be. It’s a book I remember reading the ending of, and it’s a theme for all three of these books, and just looking down and literally letting out an, “Ooooooooh~~~~” xD That’s really my ‘tell’ of a good book. I haven’t reread it since then, but it’s always stuck with me). 

Animal Farm by George Orwell:

‘Perhaps one of the most influential allegories of the 20th century, George Orwell's Animal Farm has made its way into countless schoolrooms and libraries, and has been the inspiration of several films. Written in 1945, before Orwell's conceptually similar 1984, Animal Farm's world consists of anthropomorphized farm animals as they attempt to create an ideal society--it becomes dystopian as the flaws of the ideology seep out. Like 1984, Orwell meant for Animal Farm to represent a Communist state, and to depict its downfalls. With a message that is not soon to be forgotten, Animal Farm reminds us that "all animals are equal, but some animals are more equal than others."’

(It’s stereotypical and you’ve probably read it, but I still love this book to pieces and literally have an Animal Farm pin on my bag xD If you haven’t read it, read it: It also has the OhhhOOohhh~ effect xD)

Fahrenheit 451 by Ray Bradbury:

‘Ray Bradbury's internationally acclaimed novel Fahrenheit 451 is a masterwork of 20th-century literature set in a bleak, dystopian future.

Guy Montag is a fireman. In his world, where television rules and literature is on the brink of extinction, firemen start fires rather than put them out. His job is to destroy the most illegal of commodities, the printed book, along with the houses in which they are hidden. Montag never questions the destruction and ruin his actions produce, returning each day to his bland life and wife, Mildred, who spends all day with her television "family". But then he meets an eccentric young neighbor, Clarisse, who introduces him to a past where people didn’t live in fear and to a present where one sees the world through the ideas in books instead of the mindless chatter of television. When Mildred attempts suicide and Clarisse suddenly disappears, Montag begins to question everything he has ever known. He starts hiding books in his home, and when his pilfering is discovered, the fireman has to run for his life.’

(What do I have to say by this point? Another Ooooh~ effect book xD)

[closetgremlin]

AAAAAAAAAAAAAA WHAT THE FUCK IVE JUST FINISHED FMA:B

[hiddentrails7]

Chrom: Alright, we’re done decorating the Christmas tree. Stahl, would you mind putting the angel on top?

Stahl: Oh, sure *Throws Donnel on top of the tree*

Henry: Here’s a fun Christmas idea. We hang mistletoe, but instead of kissing, you have to FIGHT whoever else is under it.

Robin: Henry, no.

Lon'qu: Mistle-FOE.

Robin: Please don’t encourage him.

Chrom: You know what they say, you have to kiss under the mistletoe.

Robin:

Robin: Chrom, that's a lettuce leaf.

Basilio, dressed as santa claus: Alright children, time for a vibe check!

Basilio: Your vibes are absolutely DISGUSTING kid. *Goes to yeet the child, Flavia and Olivia running to stop him*

Robin: Chrom, can you hang the lights?

Chrom: Why?

Robin: You know why!

Chrom: Yes, but I want to hear you say it.

Robin:

Chrom:

Robin, glaring: I’m too short.

Ricken: I hate you with every inch of my body.

Gangrel: Well, that's not a lot of inches.

Stahl: You believe me?

Lon'qu: Stahl, you're one of the few good people on this planet. I'd believe cartoon birds helped you get ready this morning.

Frederick: Quick, Robin ’s coming, everyone pretend that you’re gardening. Chrom, grab that little hoe

Chrom: *Picks up Tharja*

Gaius: So, I'm going to grab a healthy breakfast.

Frederick: Are those gummy bears wrapped in a fruit roll-up?

Gaius: Breakfast burrito, but yeah.

Frederick: I pity your dentist.

Gaius: Joke's on you, I don't have a dentist.

Robin: I panic when people compliment me.

Robin: I never know what to say.

Frederick: Great job at practice today Robin!

Robin, panicking: MERRY CHRISTMAS!

Inigo: What’s that story where they bring the monster to life and then have to destroy it?

Brady: Frankenstein?

Owain: Frosty the Snowman.

Owain: Now it’s time for some witty back-and-forth banter! You go first!

Brady: *Enraged screaming*

Owain: Okay, look, I’m not sure where to go with that.

Gaius: *Walks in the living room* hey guys, watcha watching?

Libra: Cake boss

Gaius: THERE’S A BOSS OF CAKE!?!? *Grabs a Brave sword and starts to leave*

Libra: Where you going?

Gaius: Gotta de-throne a motherfucker.

Robin: What are you, 5?!

Vaike: Yeah, 5 heads taller then you.

Robin:

Vaike:

Vaike: Please don't kill me.

Henry: *Covers Ricken's eyes from behind*

Henry: Guess who!

Henry: He’s sweet, adorable, and he’s gonna get really mad if you get it wrong.

Chrom: *Carries all of the groceries in his arms*

Robin: *Reaches out to grab a couple of groceries*

Chrom: *Switches all of the groceries to one arm to hold Robin's hand*

Robin: That’s not what I...okay.

Henry: I'M SCARED OF ELEVATORS

Henry: Buuuttt I don't wanna walk 4 floors down.

Henry: I'm gonna jump lmao

Henry: P A R K O U R

Ricken: NO WTF-

Cherche: I don't know where everyone ended up last night, but is everyone alive and not in jail?

Gerome: Alive.

Cherche: And not in jail?

Gerome: *Read 7:21am*

Cherche: GEROME-

Inigo: He’s making a list, he’s checking it twice!

Henry: He’s gonna find out who’s on thin fucking ice!

Both, in unison: 🎶Santa Claus is calling you outtt!🎶

Owain: Who decided to call it 'emotional baggage' and not 'griefcase'?

Morgan: He's onto something.

Brady: *Deep sigh*

Laurent: My body is betraying me.

Gerome: No, you're exhausted.

Gerome: That happens to people when they keep throwing themselves into danger and refuse to sleep.

Laurent: Well, I highly dislike it.

Gerome: You just need to rest. Close your eyes and--

*Laurent closes his eyes*

Lucina, who just came in: Oh my god. Is he dead?

Frederick: Can I see you? Now.

Gaius, slipping on a camo jacket: You can try.

Gaius: Welcome to the Shepards! Please leave your sanity and common sense at the door.

Laurent: Won’t I need those?

Gaius: Not anymore.

Stahl, skipping stones with Lon'qu: Wow, it's such a beautiful evening.

Lon'qu, under his breath: Take that you fucking lake.

Flavia, answering her phone: Lon'qu? I’m on my way back-

Lon'qu: Aliens are attacking the house.

Flavia: What-

Lon'qu: Oh good, Basilio found the chainsaw, nevermind.

Flavia: WAIT, LON'QU, DON’T HANG UP.

Chrom: This time, we fight Grima using our superpowers.

Chrom: Our two brain cells.

Chrom: Robin. Frederick. It's your time to shine.

Donnel: Be careful marchin' today. It's ass-eating season

Stahl:

Stahl: Donny, do you know what "ass-eating season" means?

Donnel: Yeah, there's ice and snow, so it's all slippery out there. You could fall and eat ass.

Stahl: Who taught you that?

Donnel: Henry..?

Gaius, calling Miriel:

Miriel: Hello?

Gaius: I love you.

Miriel: What did you do.

[heavenly-roman]

Sibling Culture™️

Plot: A series of events in which Roman and Remus enact peak Sibling Culture™️

Warnings: swearing, mild sexual references (aka remus being remus), a lil bit of insecurity and sibling rivalry, sympathetic remus

Pairing(s): creativitwins, mentioned/implied intruality, mentioned/implied roceit

Word Count: 1634

if you liked this, consider buying me a coffee?

Taglist: @emo-disaster @shitpost-sides @gattonero17

(ao3 link!!!)

+++

The incessant knocking on Roman’s door persists, despite Roman calling for whoever it is (Remus, definitely Remus), to come in.

After another forty-five seconds of knocking, of which Roman seriously contemplates jumping out the window, the door swings open. Remus stands there, not making a noise, until Roman groans and looks at him.

His brother is t-posing - Roman genuinely considers closing the door in his face.

“What are you doing?” Roman asks.

“Simple.” Remus responds, keeping his position. “I’m t-posing in your doorway to establish dominance as the better twin.”

“You’re not the better twin.”

Remus makes an offended noise, and Roman watches him carefully. Normally, the younger twin would make some sort of offended or crude gesture. Today, however, he is unmoving. “I am clearly the better twin, as I am currently t-posting and establishing my dominance. Try to keep up, Ro.”

“Is that all you wanted?” Roman sighs.

“Oh, dinner’s ready too,” Remus shrugs and walks away, leaving the door wide open. Bewildered, Roman follows.

+++

H. Duke (9:31pm): roman

H. Duke (9:31pm): roman

H. Duke (9:32pm): roman!!

H. Duke (9:34pm): romAN

H. Duke (9:34pm): ROMAN

   H. Chandler (9:35pm): WHAT DO YOU WANT REMUS

   H. Duke (9:37pm): i lost the game >:D

H. Chandler (9:38pm): i will END YOU

+++

Roman sighs and reluctantly knocks on Remus’ door, calling to him, “Remus, can you help me?”

“Depends,” Remus swings the door open, mischievous smirk gracing his lips. “What do you want, and what can you do for me?”

Holding out his notebook and textbook, Roman explains, “can you check that my answers are right? I can’t be in the musical if I fail math again.”

Remus gives him an expectant look, so he continues, “I’ll do your laundry for a week.”

“A month.”

“Two weeks.”

“Deal,” Remus nods and holds out his hand to shake. Roman shakes it, then hands the books to his brother, who promptly flops down into his desk chair. Roman stands anxiously as Remus compares their homework, hope growing in his stomach when Remus looks up at him with a soft smile and nods.

“They look good, Ro,” he stands, giving the books back to his twin. “You’re getting the hang of it, I’m proud of you.”

“Oh, uh, thank you, Re.”

“Don’t sweat it,” Remus shrugs. “Now get out of my room, I’m playing Minecraft.”

+++

H. Duke (11:37am): hey beefbrain are u going out for lunch?

   H. Chandler (11:38am): yes why?

   H. Duke (11:39am): bring me back a cheeseburger

   H. Chandler (11:41am): why would I do that??? you literally just called me beefbrain???

   H. Duke (11:42am): remember that time I proofread your math homework so you could audition for the wizard of oz?

    H. Chandler (11:43am): ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

H. Chandler (11:43am): extra onion right?

+++

Roman skips up the stairs, shrugging his backpack off as he opens his bedroom door. Flicking on the light, he holds back a scream as he notices Remus lounging on his bed.

“Ah, Roman King, so nice of you to join me.”

“What are you doing in my room, Remus?” Roman rolls his eyes and closes the door. He crosses his arms over his chest as Remus stands.

“Let me paint you a picture, dear brother,” Remus begins dramatically pacing around the room - it’s times like this Roman can truly see the resemblance. “You see, I entered your room in pursuit of one thing, and one thing only -  your white crop top with the skull on it.”

“In the hamper.”

“Thank you. But while looking in your closet, I found something. Any guesses?”

Roman sighs, “Your green army jacket?”

“My green army jacket!” Remus pulls the coat from behind his back and holds it up for the older twin to see. “Anything to say for yourself, thief?”

“Remus, you literally just admitted to coming in here to steal a shirt of mine. I think I’m allowed to borrow a jacket.”

“Nuh uh, I have a right as your younger sibling to steal your clothes.”

“You’re only twenty minutes younger than me?”

“Doesn’t matter, still my birth right.”

“Fine,” Roman slumps down onto his bed. “Take the shirt, and wash it before you give it back?”

“You’re doing my laundry for the next week and a half so i think you’ll be washing it.”

+++

H. Chandler (10:03am): hey

H. Chandler (10:03am): wizard of oz auditions are today at lunch

     H. Duke (10:05am): and? why should I care?

H. Duke (10:06am): wait wait I get it

H. Duke (10:06am): break a leg I guess

    H. Chandler (10:11am): not what I was getting at, but thank you

H. Chandler (10:12am): you should audition

H. Chandler (10:12am): I think you’d make a great wizard

   H. Duke (10:15am): ur hilarious

H. Duke (10:15am): absolutely not

   H. Chandler (10:17am): why not?

   H. Duke (10:17am): I have no talent

H. Duke (10:18am): you’re the one mom and dad are super proud of, remember?

  H. Chandler (10:21am): Remus, shut up. You’re one of the most talented people I’ve ever met

H. Chandler (10:22am): you’re related to me, afterall

H. Chandler (10:22am): mom and dad are proud of you too, by the way

      H. Duke (10:25am): fine

  H. Chandler (10:27am): fine????

  H. Duke (10:28am): fine, i’ll audition, but only to get you off my back

   H. Chandler (10:32am): love you too!!!

  H. Duke (10:33am): you’re also buying me lunch

+++

The auditorium door barely closes behind him before Roman is bombarding him with questions.

“How did it go? What did they say? How do you feel? What-”

“Roman.”

“Sorry.

Remus motions for them to walk as he begins speaking, “It went well, I guess. They said I was ‘very promising’, whatever that means.”

“Remus, that’s amazing!” Roman exclaims. He fishes his car keys from his pocket and unlocks the door, sliding into the driver’s seat. “This calls for celebratory milkshakes.”

“We only do that when you get the role, dumbass.”

“But I know that you’re going to!”

“Look, Ro, I-” Remus sighs, turning in the passenger seat to face his brother. “Don’t get my hopes up, okay? The audition… felt good, yeah, but that doesn’t mean anything. I’ve seen you study really hard for tests and feel good about them and then fail, you know? Feeling good does nothing, and I barely prepared for it.”

The silence in the car was thick, both of them sitting in the truth of Remus’ words, before Roman speaks up again.

“Well,” He says, starting the car. “I guess we really do need those shakes.”

+++

H. Chandler (4:46pm): stop talking to patton, he’s my friend not yours

  H. Duke (5:07pm): sorry what was that? I was busy getting my dick sucked by patton

   H. Chandler (5:08pm): OH MY GOD

H. Chandler (5:08pm): TMI??????????????

  H. Duke (5:10pm): kidding kidding

         H. Chandler (5:11pm): oh thank god

   H. Duke (5:13pm): i was sucking HIS dick

   H. Chandler (5:14pm): REMUS WHAT THE FUCK

     H. Duke (5:17pm): im kidding again

H. Duke (5:17pm): we’re studying, calm down

    H. Chandler (5:18pm): don’t you EVER do that to me again

   H. Duke (5:26pm): yeah whatever

H. Duke (5:26pm): i’ll stop hanging out with patton if you stop hanging out with dee

H. Duke (5:27pm): hE’s mY fRiEnD nOt YoUrS

    H. Chandler (5:31pm): bold of you to assume dee and I are just friends

H. Chandler (5:32pm): but alright, I concede, as long as you never try to tell me about your real or imaginary sex life again

    H. Duke (5:38pm): deal

+++

“They posted the cast list!” Roman jumps up and down in front of his brother. “Should we go check together?”

Remus grimaces, “I think I’m good, you can check it yourself.”

“Remus,” Roman frowns. “A wise man once told me to always receive news first hand, and that’s why he would never check cast lists for me.”

“You already know your news.” Remus picks at the olives in his salad.

“But you don’t know yours!” Roman insists.

“Roman.”

“Remus.”

“No.”

“Yes.”

“Check it for me.”

“No.”

“Yes.”

“ Please .”

“Fine.” Remus pushes his chair out and stands. “But only to shut you up.”

“And that’s how you win the game, folks.”

Remus rolls his eyes and pushes past Roman who makes an offended noise and follows him. His steps become smaller as he grows closer to the auditorium door where the cast list is posted. Nervously, he asks, “Check it first?”

Roman nods sympathetically and makes his way to the door. “Do you want me to read it out loud?” He asks.

“Please.”

“Scarecrow: Roman King. Tin Man: Dee Lyre. Cowardly Lion: Patton Hart. The Wizard-”

“Wait,” Remus interrupts. “Let me read this one.”

“By all means.”

Remus takes a deep breath and reads the list, “The Wizard: Remus King.”

Roman cheers, and Remus joins in too. They’re practically screaming by the time they reach the cafeteria again, but no one bothers to stop them.

+++

H. Chandler (1:56pm): so, celebratory milkshakes after school?

       H. Duke (1:59pm): you know it

H. Duke (2:00pm): oh and bring a mayo jar so I can put my shake in it and freak people out

       H. Chandler (2:03pm): absolutely not, plans cancelled

     H. Duke (2:04pm): :(

       H. Chandler (2:08pm): ugh okay fine plans uncancelled but i'm not bringing a mayo jar

       H. Duke (2:09pm): :D

H. Duke (2:09pm): and it’s fine i have my own

     H. Chandler (2:11pm): not even gonna ask

H. Chandler (2:14pm): oh and remus?

    H. Duke (2:15pm): yeah?

    H. Chandler (2:21pm): I lost the game

[angstyaches]

What Good

Oh boy. Here, have it. Direct continuation of Chapter 4.

Warning for emeto, sleep paralysis, implied injury, implied vore(?).

Swallow the World, Chapter 5

9:50pm

“What’s that weird smile about?”

I looked up to see Shayne gazing at me, as intently as I’d been staring at the front of his t-shirt. My face felt red-hot, but there was a little more colour in his face now too, whereas he’d been a little washed-out when he’d arrived.

“Is it the human or the demon half of you that’s enjoying me being in pain?”

“What? Neither,” I said, laughing nervously. “You’re just softer than I expected.”

Oh, God, why did I say that? I might as well have just called him fat, when really, it was just that the leather jacket gave off one impression, while his body gave off another. His hip bones and ribs were softly padded out and when I’d first pressed my palm against his belly, the flesh had rippled just slightly. The only thing hard about it was around the area he’d led to with his fingers, just below his belly button, where the muscles seemed to be cramping.

I swallowed, wondering why he wasn’t saying anything. “Please don’t kill me.”

“Trust me, I don’t have the energy to kill anything right now.” He let out a shaky breath. “So, what, you thought I was made of stone?”

“No,” I laughed. “Leather.”

“Yeah, that makes sense.” Shayne’s voice was heavy, like he was stifling a yawn. He put an arm behind his head, and I swear he pushed his stomach up towards my hand just a little.

I gradually leaned to the side, his legs still stretched over my lap, and used one hand to prop my head up from the bed. I was tired too, but I was too focused on the grumbling of Shayne’s tummy to think about sleep. I wanted to slip my hand under his t-shirt and feel the warmth of it up close, but even in my happy, sleep daze, I knew that wasn’t a great idea.

I didn’t want to shock him so much that he screamed and brought my parents up here. The thought of getting caught with Shayne in my room made my own stomach do a fluttery little twist. Or maybe that feeling was caused by Shayne’s gaze that had fallen on me again.

“Tired?” he asked.

“Just a bit,” I admitted.

“Want me to go, or – or at least move?”

“Don’t you dare,” I sighed, lowering my cheek to the front of his t-shirt. His stomach was thrashing and gurgling next to my ear. I had a flash of panic at the thought of what was actually going on in there, then at the thought of what he claimed he could do. I wondered what it would be like to gasp for air, to frantically search for life, all while being crushed and liquified and –

I hissed through my teeth as my left eye was suddenly shot through with pain. My head felt like someone had just slapped the outside of my skull with a tuning fork. I couldn’t hold back a whimper at the sudden agony.

I started to lift my hand to my head, but there were already fingers gliding through my hair, tracing down my forehead. Goosebumps lifted under the sleeves of my jumper. The tips of Shayne’s fingers brushed lightly against my closed eyelid. My breath shuddered.

“Shayne,” I whispered against his t-shirt, my voice pinched with pain. “Are you going to destroy me?”

As soon as the question was out, and Shayne’s touch began calming my anxiety, the pain in my head and my eye started retreating. I felt Shayne stifle a laugh in his diaphragm.

“I could ask you the same thing.”

3:21am

It was like a bird of prey was shrieking into a tin can and that tin can was in my mouth.

I wrenched my eyelids open with some effort, feeling an echo of the pain in my eye from before I’d gone to sleep. I tried to lift my head from the pillow, but my neck muscles didn’t react to my brain’s commands. It wasn’t a pillow anyway. It was Shayne. I breathed sharply through my nose, my fingers twitching slightly as I attempted to grab at his t-shirt. 

A piercing jab of sound shot through my skull. My eyes fell on the slim shadow standing in the middle of my room, watching me as I failed to move. It appeared calm tonight, whereas it would often wander about the room, nudging my things so that they faced the wrong way. 

Another piercing cry. The shadow figure turned its head in the direction of the window, reacting to the sound.

Shayne tensed and gasped, trying to sit upright but finding me in the way.

“Char–” he whispered, fear breaking his voice. “Charlie? Charlie, they’re – they’re coming.”

I practically gasped inside my own head, because I’d never heard him sounding so frantic. I tried to speak, tried to tell him I couldn’t wake up, I couldn’t move, but while my throat contracted and filled up with words, my tongue and my jaw limply resisted. I tried to move my hand again. My lungs inflated and deflated more quickly the more Shayne shook me.

The shadow figure reached towards me as that awful ringing warped the silence in the room. 

A slap of dull pain thumped against the back of my head, and as I blinked in shock, the shadow figure vanished. My hand gripped at Shayne’s side and I gasped for a decent breath.

All too soon, he pushing at my shoulder so we were both sitting up. His hair was a mess, and his face was horribly pale. He didn’t stop pushing me until we were both standing. My legs were more like shoelaces as he dragged me towards my bedroom door.

“Wait in the hall,” he said, turning the key.

“W-wait – what?” I asked, my voice deep and trembling thanks to the muscles in my mouth and throat that hadn’t quite woken up yet. My skin was tingling and my stomach was sending burning waves of acid up into my chest.

“See you at school, I guess.”

“Shayne –” I heaved and stumbled as I was flung through the doorway and onto the landing.

I immediately sank to my hands and knees as that awful shrieking sound echoed through my head again. A cry died in my throat as my jaw fell open, and a stream of dark, liquid vomit gushed from my mouth to the floor. In the dim light, the disgusting puddle spread across the polished wood, beads of it gathering at the edges.

Glass shattered behind my bedroom door.

I gasped and trembled, feeling my stomach knot up under my ribs, my arms threatening to drop me into my own sick. And my head, my head. Whatever pain had been lurking in my skull felt like it wanted out, it wanted to break right through my flesh and bone.

A mumbled fuck you, and a heavy thumping sound.

“Shayne,” I hissed, sitting back on my knees. I reached a hand towards the door, pulling myself forward when all my bones wanted to do was settle on the floor. I stared up at the door handle, wondering how the hell I was going to reach it when I could barely hold myself up, when –

Click.

The handle turned, the door swinging back. I felt weirdly grateful that my eye was hurting so bad I had my hand pressed to it, because if I’d seen the thing with both eyes, I might have lost my sanity.

Giant leather wings the length of my bed, extending and contracting around a mass of black fur, and a set of knobbly grey claws ripping open the shoulders on Shayne’s jacket. His eyes widened when he saw me, but the creature that had a hold of him didn’t notice I’d opened the door.

The sound of wings whirled around the room, lifting the matted hair from my face and neck. Shayne lowered his gaze just before he was dragged through the shattered window and into the night.

“Shayne,” I whimpered, all too late for him to hear me. What good are you?

I retched on the bedroom floor, even though I was already empty, sobbing and spitting thick saliva on the floor. It could have been seconds or hours before I felt my dad close his hands around my waist.

“Charlie?”

“Charlie, baby, what – what happened?” Mum’s voice was high-pitched with despair. “Oh my god – Trev, there’s blood over there, is he bleeding?”

“He’s – he’s fine. You’re – you’re fine, aren’t you, son?”

Their questions and concerns all warped into white noise. I realised, numbly, that they were panicking too much to notice the out-of-place Doc Martens sitting next to my bed. Dark eyes began to materialise in front of my own, and anger bubbled in my veins as my throat locked up to stop me from screaming.

What good are you?

What good are you?

[fingerbangchan]

mads @discordantz tagged me in this which is so fun 🥺 i guess i’m supposed to tag 20 ppl i wanna get to know better or smthn but i can warn u rn it’s gonna be like 5 at most

1. name: macy 😁

2. gender: *sweating nervously* ......next question

3. sign: cancer 😔

4. height: 5’4”

5. time: 2:21am

6. birthday: june 22 1999

7. fav band(s): oh god oh fuck uhhh the front bottoms, all time low, fall out boy

8. fav solo artist(s): truly the only solo artist i can think of that i listen to a lot is like literally taylor swift

9. song stuck in my head: radical by awolnation ft grouplove

10. last movie i watched: probably while you were sleeping i think ?

11. last show i watched: oh god more than likely it was new girl

12. when did i make this blog: june of 2012 😐✋🏻

13. what do i post: absolute garbage

14. last thing i googled: “capricorn rising” i was doing research on a man’s (🤢) birth chart

15. any sideblogs: no. sjdhsjdjsk i made a post abt this i literally can’t handle the pressure i just post what i post and my followers can take it or leave it

16. do i get asks: like almost never honestly the last one i got was probably 2015 do you guys hate me or smthn 🥲

17. why i chose this url: void stiles

18. following: 207

19. followers: 1099 (one more PLEASE anyone but a p*rn bot 🤲🏻)

20. average hrs of sleep: probably like 10-12 i love to sleep

21. lucky number: 7 i guess ?????

22. do i play any instruments: kinda play the ukulele and played the trumpet in high school

23. what am i wearing: a pair of ripped black jeans , all black converse, a heart belt with like 4 chains attached to it, and a graphic tee from earthbound

24. dream job: CAKE DECORATOR CAKE DECORATOR CAKE DECORATOR

25. dream trip: ummmm i’ve always wanted to go to both new york and LA so bad

26. fav food: sushi that’s so easy

27. nationality: american (😔)

28. fav song(s): hard times by paramore , gold rush by taylor swift, young volcanoes by fob

29. last book i read: i Do Not Remember i think i’m illiterate

30. fav fictional universe: teen wolf widhskdhsjd sorry

anyways thank u mads for tagging me 🥺 i’ll tag like uh @carifusaga and uh @lisainhell and @stilin-ski and mmmmm any of my other mutuals who wanna do this! just say i tagged u babes <3

[yoon-kooks]

Witch Hazel- Pt.3

Pairing: Jungkook x Reader

Genre: FanficWriter!Jungkook, Idol!Reader, College!AU, Angst, Fluff

Summary: There are two students in your art class with a secret: you and the quiet Jeon Jungkook. You’re a problematic idol singer, infamous for your ice cold reputation and perpetual resting bitch face; he’s the artist and author behind the viral comic series based on a certain ice queen idol. After a blowup of destructive rumors, lost motivation and inevitable solitude, you stumble upon Jungkook’s comic and find a new and unexpected light.

Word Count: 2.7k

Parts: 1 // 2 // 3 // 4 // 5 // 6 // ?

A/N: i made an unintentional dragon ball z reference at the end of the previous chapter, and now this chapter is loaded with anime references LMAO dont worry if you arent familiar with dbz or sailor moon though!💖

As you approach the entrance to the mall, you have but one wish: Taehyung better show up before Jungkook. Not because you prefer Taehyung, but because you’re terrible at handling small talk and conversation—especially with a timid introvert like Jungkook. You’d rather leave it up to talkative Taehyung to prevent any awkward silences.

Unfortunately for you, however, your wish is not granted. Instead, you spot a bespectacled boy in a bucket hat and white shirt (not a hoodie for once!) sitting on a bench and taking pictures on his phone right outside of the mall. He doesn’t seem to notice you until he looks up from his phone and you’re standing right there with a tiny wave hello. Flustered, he adjusts his glasses and waves back, but that’s the extent of your greetings to one another.

So for the longest thirteen minutes of your life, a huge gap of nothingness sits between you and Jungkook on a wooden bench outside of the mall, waiting for Taehyung to show up. The boy resumes taking photos of the blue sky and the mall itself. You don’t get what’s so photo-worthy about an ordinary sky and the generic architecture of the mall. But then again, this is a boy who also probably has 256GB of storage space dedicated to pictures of his favorite idol (one of which is his lockscreen)—and you certainly don’t understand the appeal of Snow. Therefore, you do not bother asking the boy about his reasons for wasting storage space on certain photos. You wouldn’t understand anyway.

And since Jungkook is too busy using his phone for photos at one end of the bench, you decide to use your phone to text the missing boy from the opposite end of the bench.

10:13AM Y/N “Taehyung, it’s past 10. Where are you??”

10:14AM Taehyung “On my way baby. And don’t worry, I promise I’ll make it worth the wait 😉”

As both a desired and disliked idol, you’ve been called a lot of things: beauty, bitch, babe, ice queen, slut, witch. And you’ve put up with it because you feel like, to some degree, you brought it upon yourself. But you’re wondering what you did to deserve a “baby” from Taehyung. Because the last thing you want is for someone who’s kind-of-not-really your friend to make any sort of romantic advances on you when they know nothing about you.  

10:15AM Y/N “Who are you calling baby.”

10:16AM Taehyung “?”

10:17AM Taehyung “But you were fine with it the other night 🍆💦”

10:18AM Jungkook “monkaS”

10:19AM Taehyung “Wait”

10:19AM Y/N “What’s a monkas”

10:20AM Taehyung “Oops wrong chat LOL”

10:21AM Taehyung “Anyway I already told you guys yesterday that I wasn’t coming to the group project thing. I’m busy.”

He sends a screenshot of the group chat where he very clearly had said he wasn’t free. You must’ve missed that text somehow—a fatal mistake on your end because now you’re alone at the mall with Jungkook and it’s damn near impossible to talk to that kid when you can’t even relate to him. At least Taehyung could’ve broken the ice, but of course he’s too busy getting laid.

10:22AM Y/N “Can’t you fuck around later?”

10:23AM Jungkook “poggers”

10:24AM Y/N “What’s a poggers”

10:24AM Taehyung “Sorry I need at least 2 business days to cancel or change an appointment. I’m a man of my word, not a monster ¯\_(ツ)_/¯”

10:25AM Taehyung “But have fun on your date without me~”

10:26AM Jungkook “it’s not a date”

10:26AM Y/N “It’s not a date.”

At least you and Jungkook can both agree that it isn’t a date. But that doesn’t change the fact that you’re stuck hanging out with him for a few hours to “get to know each other” for your stupid art project. How are you even supposed to get to know the boy when there’s nothing to talk about?

“What’s a monkas and poggers?” you ask, because your antisocial mind can’t think of anything else to say once the spam of text messages ends.

“Oh that…” Jungkook looks back down at his phone, scrolling through the text conversation to track down his cryptic messages. “It just means like oh my god and stuff.”

“In what language?” you attempt to keep the small talk going. But from the look of Jungkook’s shifty eyes, it seems you’ve probed too far.

“Gaming... language…”

“Oh.” As far as you can tell by his brief responses, the boy would rather not elaborate further. So you let the conversation die.

Instead, the two of you begin wandering around the mall, hoping it’ll spark any sort of conversation. Of course it doesn’t.

At least not initially.

For exactly 16 minutes (you would know because you’d been checking your phone every other minute as if time would pass any faster that way), you and Jungkook aimlessly walk around the mall without saying a word. And it isn’t until a new shop fills Jungkook’s eyes with sparkles that you spot an opportunity to make something happen.

The shop window is decorated with the cutest recognizable characters: Pikachu, Totoro, Naruto, Sailor Moon, and all their friends. The boy appears to have his eye on the green dragon summoned from seven Dragon Balls. He doesn’t say anything, but it’s obvious he’s interested.

Knowing him, he’d say no if you asked him if he wanted to go inside, in fear of being a burden and wasting your time. So you find a loop hole.

“Let’s go in here,” you say. He nods, obediently following you in but keeping a safe distance. While he’d say no to his own desires, he has a hard time saying no to what everyone else wants. Sounds familiar.

The first thing you see when you walk in is the magic girl section. As someone who grew up admiring Sailor Moon, you would’ve liked to have scouted out that section for nostalgic purposes. The only thing stopping you is the hoard of weebs in that corner. Jungkook, on the other hand, goes right in.

As he joins the frenzy over waifus and body pillows, you shake your head and make a U-turn towards the section with ninjas, pirates, dragon slayers, and Saiyans. The seven plastic Dragon Balls call out to you, just as they had to Jungkook before he got distracted by pink-haired heroines. If you could have one wish granted with the magic of the Dragon Balls, what would you even wish for? There’s not much that you want, except for maybe a life you don’t feel ashamed of. But not even magic would be able to help you with that.

Sighing, you pick up a display model of one of the Dragon Ball fighters and replace his natural black hair with spiky blonde hair to transform him into a Super Saiyan, an almighty hero to protect the world.

“What exactly is the science behind turning blonde when they unleash their Super Saiyan strength?” you mumble to yourself… and the quiet boy next to you. He has a tiny shopping bag with him, so at least you know he didn’t splurge on a body pillow.

“From an artist’s perspective, it makes it easier for people to distinguish between different power levels. Especially in the comics where it’s black and white, so…” Jungkook’s rambling fades out when he realizes you might not be interested in his weeby-artist mind.

“That makes sense,” you say, still fumbling around with the Super Saiyan’s spiky blonde hair. You’d thought maybe it meant something more significant. As if changing one’s appearance could make them stronger by hiding who they really are. “But I suppose not all plot details need to be that deep.”

He nods and picks up another Dragon Ball character, the bald kid with six dots on his head, and wiggles it in your direction. “Is this the kind of anime you’re into?”

You can’t help but sneer at the random but mysterious six dots on the bald head. “This and Sailor Moon.”

Jungkook’s magic girl radar goes off when you mention Sailor Moon. “Oh, so like heroes and stuff?”

“I guess,” you answer, though you’ve never really thought about it that way. It’s not like you intentionally sought out for anything involving superheroes, but it’s something you’d always been naturally drawn to. “Though it seems a bit childish to say it out loud, doesn’t it?”

“I’m sure everyone has wished to be a hero at some point in their life,” the boy says, glancing back at the seven Dragon Balls. “After all, heroes give us something to admire and believe in.”

“Exactly.” You set the Super Saiyan back down on the shelf and stare at the glammed-up Sailor Moon beauties from afar. For just a split second, you’re reminded of your fateful decision to become Snow. “Kind of like idols, right?”

Jungkook flinches, clutching onto his shopping bag as if you’re lowkey judging him for being obsessed with not only pretty idols, but also pretty magic girls. You weren’t planning on bringing up the topic of idols because it can be quite toxic for yourself, but it somehow slipped out of your mouth in the presence of the biggest Snow fanboy. Oops.

“Yeah, kinda…” He lets out a half-laugh, but it sounds forced, only to fill another round of awkward silence as you both exit the anime shop. Great, you’ve brought up another touchy subject and now the boy’s back on lockdown. And just when the two of you were starting to get on the same page.

“I mean… I used to look up to the Sailor Moon characters… because they were my idols… my heroes…” you stumble over your words in an attempt to salvage any momentum you had built up with Jungkook. Surely this is something the weeb can relate to and not feel bad about now that you’ve exposed a bit of your dark past.

“Really?” He tilts his head and eases his grip on the shopping bag. “Who’s your bias—I mean favorite—of the Sailor Scouts?”

You assume he’s asking because your favorite can say a lot about you. Do you prefer crybabies like Sailor Moon, smarties like Mercury, hotheads like Mars, muscles like Jupiter, or perhaps the one who fantasizes over becoming an idol? “Sailor Venus.”

Before responding, Jungkook shuffles through his shopping bag and pulls out a tiny keychain of Sailor Venus with her pretty long hair and orange sailor suit. “Me too.”

You wonder what that says about Jeon Jungkook.

-

By the time lunch comes around, long silences still follow into the food court but somehow you feel less pressure to fill in the gaps. You’re simply okay with being in the boy’s company. Something about it is almost as refreshing as the iced tea you’re sipping on.

As you down your drink, you stare intently at the tall stack of pancakes across from you. The boy’s plate of fluffy delicacies has to be quadruple the size of your tiny salad bowl that you ordered out of habit.

“Um… do you want some?” Jungkook points to his pancakes, but his eyes are glued to your lips—probably because of the drool and not because you share the same pout as Snow.

“No thanks, I’m trying to eat healthier, and I already splurged on pancakes the other day,” you sigh. Even though you've taken a step back from idol life, you feel the need to maintain your image and health for the sake of fans who may worry about you. It’s in your blood, and sometimes you hate yourself for it. “But honestly, you’re really tempting me, you know.”

“Here.” Before you can refuse, Jungkook plops one of his pancakes onto the rim of your salad bowl. “It kinda defeats the purpose of dieting if it makes you unhappy, right? But that’s why cheat days exist~”

“That’s true.” You take a single bite of your pancake, savoring its subtle sweetness. You can’t remember the last time you found pure bliss in something as simple as pancakes without worry. “Thanks, Jung-”

You’re cut off by the fact that the boy’s stack of pancakes vanished, only leaving traces of syrup on the plate and a cute little crumb on the corner of his lips.

“Did you just inhale all your food while I took one (1) bite?”

He swallows the food in his mouth and takes a sip of his milk. “Maybe.”

You don’t know whether to be shocked or impressed, but it made you giggle either way. “You’re a funny guy, you know that?”

Flustered, the boy scurries off to dispose of his food tray. You rarely hand out compliments, and maybe this is why. It probably seems too out of character for someone like yourself, and Jungkook’s fragile little heart can’t handle it.

You punch yourself in the face until Jungkook walks back to the table. Seeing as you’ve only started making a dent in your lunch, he captures a few more photos on this phone, this time of the mall interior and food court. Then he pulls out his sketchbook.

He begins by mapping out a blank page with light lines and dots. Little by little, he adds in the tables, the people, the food. And before you know it, he has the whole food court sketched out and you haven’t even touched your salad yet.

“Are you into architecture? Or like exterior & interior design?” You don’t exactly know the proper art terms for whatever Jungkook’s drawing, but it would explain why he always seems to be taking photos of wherever he goes.

“Yeah, architecture and design are cool.” He shrugs and doesn’t sound all that convincing. So he diverts the spotlight back onto you. “By the way, I mean this in the least offensive way possible, but you’re not an art major, right?”

“Are you saying that because I’m shitty at art?” you pretend to be offended, but you know he’s not the malicious type. “Or because I’m always carrying a guitar to class?”

“The latter.” You see a tiny smirk on the boy’s face as he continues to add in details to his sketch. He’d never say it, but you can tell he’s also thinking your art is complete trash. “Is it music theory? Or just guitar? Or songwrit-”

Bing! Your phone notification saves you from a potentially loaded question about an uncertain future in music, and you couldn’t be more grateful. It’s a new Witch Hazel update from jk.seagull.

You glance over to Jungkook, expecting him to have the same notification on his phone. But he doesn’t. “I would’ve expected you of all people to have notifications turned on for Witch Hazel.”

“Really? Is it because you think I’m that in love with Snow?” It’s Jungkook’s turn to pretend to be offended. You’re glad to see him lightening up and not taking things to heart.

“Are you not in love with Snow?” you tease. Jungkook freezes and so do you. Why the fuck would you ever ask him if he’s in love with an extension of yourself? You don’t want to hear the answer because it’ll hurt you either way. “Nevermind, don’t answer that.”

You quickly skim jk.seagull’s beautiful comic-style artwork and stop at a panel of Snow and the new bunny boy character squaring up.

“But doesn’t this look like something right up your alley?” You flip your phone around to let the boy see the cute art.

“Does it?” Jungkook looks up from his sketchbook and puts down his pencil.

“Yeah, it feels like it would be more your style than realistic architecture would,” you say, although his sketch of the food court is somehow more gorgeous than the actual food court itself. “But I don’t know… You’d be fine with anything in the art field, to be honest.”

To your surprise, the boy shakes his head at your phone screen. “I’m not cut out for something like that.”

“Coming from the best artist in our class,” you say unconvinced. He has to be joking. Or maybe just overly modest. “Obviously I don’t know how you are with storytelling and stuff, but your art is undeniably incredible. And you have a lot of passion and knowledge for comics and anime…”

“Thanks, Y/N, but I don’t think that’s the problem.”

[gayforplague]

Ranty time boies

So, just a warning, this is my op on the new She-ra.

OKaY, so this is mainly about character design / animation of the show. So, I did graphics, I know my shit when it comes to colour pallets and now I do fashion design in college so, hold yourself.

As a child, I watched the original She-ra, now I wasn’t and still am not the age of when She-ra and He-man first started, but it became a hyperfixation for me (ADHD and Autism).  I got the art book ect ect. I think my main problem with She-ra is just how different it is to the original show, it’s so different, in fact, I can’t actually connect the two. I’m not a big fan of the character designs either. The first section I am writing is Character design!

Firstly, lets start with the vintage characters, or rather, the originals. Catra, now in the old show, Catra was a very threatening villain, her design gave a very threatening look. That woman could and would absolutely mirk me. As a villain, although she didn’t have much of a presence in the og show, (since Hordak was like the skeletor of the show), she still had enough to make me go ‘OwO, scary cat lady’.

Now, onto Catra’s new design. I hate it. I,,, she’s just not,,, threatening anymore. There is no threat when she’s onscreen, I don’t feel threatened, rather I just sort of feel like “oop- there’s that one misunderstood edgy character uwu”. Not to mention, until very recently, there was MASSIVE queer bating, not only that, Catra as a new character (I stand by this) is just not good?? Especially when she is put in the relationship with Adora. Hordak.

WhERE do I beGin. Old Hordak, like catra, very very threatening, a scary god damn villain, I actually was scared of him as a kiddo! Seeing Adora beat this big, mean scary dude every day when I got home from school was honestly great! The chemistry of a villain and hero is very important for a good show, and although redemption arcs can be great... sometimes (cough, steven universe @ the Diamonds)... they aren’t,,, very good His new design is OK, but once again, he’s sort of been squishied. Into a kinda sad emo boy who is so soft UwU. His design does not give me danger, just edgy scene kid boy that lives down my road who skates about doing kick flips lmao. Lastly, Adora. So, I have no problem with them ageing all the characters down (I guess), but more or less, with personality I just can’t see her as Adora. I get it, she has a pretty good design! I actually kinda like her new design, but honestly, it may be because it’s the one that has changed the least.

Now, I know I haven’t spoken about all of the characters, and I won’t, these are just the ones I have the biggest grievances with. Onto animation + background. oh fuck. oh god. oh fuck. Old she-ra backgrounds > new she-ra backgrounds the same applies for animation. So, the og She-ra was all hand drawn, the backgrounds are hand painted and good Lord- if you get the chance, I highly recommend checking them out, because christ on a bike, they are gorgeous. You can really tell the time and effort that went into the shows. For a quick example,  (I know these aren’t the same scenes, but it’s an example). The top is Greyskull from the og and the bottom is from the new she-ra.

Now, animation. Once again, the original She-ra was all hand drawn (I highly recommend the official art book, it’s chef’s kiss)  and the new is flash animated. But FUCKING HELL. WHY DID THE HAND DRAWN SHOW THAT WAS MADE JUST TO SELL GOD DAMN TOYS HAVE BETTER EXPRESSIONS THAT THE ONE THAT HAS A RIDICULOUS NETFLIX BUDGET?? Like, check out some scenes from each show and just bask in it.  I will probably do a part 2 with more in depth things, but it’s 4:21am where I am,, and I am lowkey sleep deprived lmao.

[ninaahelvar]

Chivalry Fell On Its Sword (9/23)

Summary: All Arya wanted so to feel normal and go outside of the damn castle. Now, through a series of unfortunate, she’s stuck with a bodyguard that she accidentally flirted with: Gendry Waters.

AO3

A/N: what? two chapters in one week! well one is a joke chapter, we get productive. i'm only here for the laughs. xx and i did promise slam poetry so,.......

10:31pm - Arya: So, what youre saying is that you were awkward cause you could see through my blanket? 

10:32pm - Gendry: dude, your nipples were showing through it, it was a turn on and then because incredibly awkward when your fucking mum walked in.

10:32pm - Arya: and everything else?

10:32pm - Gendry: fucked up universe keeping us apart, sorry

10:33pm - Arya: awwww you’re so cute when you’re desperate 

10:33pm - Gendry: i don’t think you’re allowed to complain when you fucking yell at me in a hallway begging me for an answer for something i wasn’t intentionally doing 

10:33pm - Arya: i stand by my reaction 

10:33pm - Gendry: ok then 

10:33pm - Arya: alright 

10:35pm - Arya: soooooooooooooo

10:35pm - Arya: you still in the palace? 

10:37pm - Gendry: You’re seriously horny right now? 

10:37pm - Arya: aren’t you 

10:38pm - Gendry: literally always, but i’m still in my meeting 

10:38pm - Arya: i’ll send you nudes to keep your spirits up 

10:42pm - Gendry: pls for the love of the gods, don’t, cause my spirits won’t be the only thing that’s up 

Arya chew on her lip as she read over his name. His apology. His casual confession of love. And she beamed. 

10:43pm - Gendry: can i see you later? 

10:43pm - Arya: yes

~~~~

Bran wheeled up to the stage, a few stares and whispers as one of the wheels caught on the last step. In the end, the manager of the club and a few bystanders had to help him. It wasn’t embarrassing, just a little awkward to have three grown men fondling his chair and not him. 

He had invited Arya, who happened to bring along Gendry - funny how her security followed her absolutely everywhere, but Bran wasn’t. He thought it may have been some ableist crap, but when he saw Arya’s hand on his wrist as Bran edged towards the mic it was clear what the real reason was. Also the hickey on his neck was a dead give away. 

Bran cleared his throat and Arya and Gendry stopped speaking. The open mic night was his idea. Bran had worked up this plan for a while, knowing full well he could get away with it - but now he was here, and only confidence and determination ran through him. Chaos wheeling - if you will. He took a breath, then spoke into the mic. 

“I’m a theology major, I can take confession, even with this wheelchair condition. My legs stopped working when the car flipped, now it seems like I’m the one that’s dicked. I make light of the frame that holds me, even when it’s the thing that has made me lonely. I smile and wave, even when no one thinks I’m gay. The wheels tend to avert the eyes, even when I wanna talk to guys. I hear sympathy from women across the world, but I can still make your world whirl. I don’t wanna talk about how the chair feels or what kind of drink I want with my meal - I’m a grown ass man, a man that just can’t stand. I’m filled with love and wanting, and I’m a fun guy that deserves some flaunting. I’m a theology major, I can take confession. And yes, to answer your question, my dick does work, and I have a suggestion. Either mind your business, apologise for the transgression. Or date me, I can still fuck, no repression, in succession, with or without discretion.”

When everyone was roaring with laughter, and Bran was helped from the stage, he wheeled over to Arya and Gendry’s table. They were trying hard to catch their breaths, hands on the ribs as they tried to form sentences. 

“Your highness,” Gendry started before promptly bursting into laughter, patting Bran on the shoulder as he wheezed out another laugh.

“What the fuck was that?” 

“I wanted everyone to know that I still fuck.” 

The pair looked at each other before banging their hands on the table, the entire venue a stream of laughter. It made Bran happy. 

The next day, Robb texted the group an article. 

TO GROUP ‘The Ghost Fan Club (Jon fuck off)’ 

9:40am - Robb: “Prince Bran does the worst, most inappropriate poem at an open mic night”

9:40am - Robb: What the fuck did you do?

9:41am - Arya: 

9:41am - Rickon: YOU FUCKING DIDN’T!!!!

9:41am - Sansa: i thought you were joking! 

9:42am - Bran: I’m single, and the people deserve to know that my dick still works 

9:42am - Jon: He’s right

9:43am - Davos: PRINCE BRAN - YOU DID NOT SAY THIS IN FRONT OF PEOPLE 

9:43am - Arya: he said, and a quote ‘to answer your question, my dick does work’

9:44am - Davos: I might actually have a heart attack 

9:44am - Rickon: HE NEEDS SOME MILK

9:45am - Davos: i think this is it for today. I’m not angry, I’m just disappointed. 

9:46am - Rickon: press f in the chat for a fallen brother 

9:46am - Robb: oh...that’s cold davos 

9:47am - Sansa: this year we lost our dear brother bran

9:47am - Bran: quit telling everyone i’m dead 

9:48am - Sansa: sometimes i can still hear his voice 

*

The Memes of the Royalest Kind @TheRoyalMemeFamily: The family portrait for the Stark siblings is FINALLY out!

@TheRoyalMemeFamily: they are dressed in traditional Winterfell garments - only the royals now wear them. And they stink. 

RobbWinterfell: @TheRoyalMemeFamily how can this be a family portrait if i’m not there 

TheRoyalMemeFamily: @RobbWinterfell ohhhhh…..you must be that imposter king. We know you’re related to the actor Richard Madden

Sansa Stark of Winterfell @PrincessSansa: also, the only reason Arya likes wearing this outfit is cause hers comes with a sword

@TheRoyalMemeFamily: @PrincessSansa can confirm this outfit was made for a child

@AryaStark: @TheRoyalMemeFamily @PrincessSansa still as sharp as a real sword 

*

@wetbreadvevo: so...the fucking starks have been posting pics from their family photoshoot this entire time and no one has questioned it? What the fuck 

*

3:14pm - Jon: hey, mate, you know Richard Madden in gonna be at this event night, right 

3:15pm - Robb: fuck….are you serious? 

3:16pm - Jon: yep, saw the guest list last night 

3:17pm - Robb: *typing*

3:17pm - Jon: yes it’s too late to cancel 

3:17pm - Robb: fuck 

3:18pm - Robb: can we just avoid him the entire night? 

3:18pm - Jon: I mean sure but it’ll be a bit rude 

3:19pm - Robb: okay new plan, I’ll greet him at the event, but if you see anyone taking pictures, tackle them to the ground 

3:19pm - Robb: I don’t need the girls finding photographic evidence that I’ve met him

3:20pm - Jon: you know that I know you’ve met him before right 

3:20pm - Robb: yes...but the girls are gonna give me so much shit, especially if we look buddy-buddy in the photos

*

TO GROUP ‘The Ghost Fan Club (Jon fuck off)’ 

8:20am - Sansa: so

8:20am - Sansa: richard madden was at that even last night huh? 

8:20am - Sansa: the fuck robb 

8:21am - Robb: i’m very proud of my ability to ignore the man all evening 

8:22am - Jon: he hid behind a plant at one stage 

8:22am - Jon: yes, everyone noticed 

8:23am - Bran: who’s the idiot now

8:24am - Arya: still you 

8:25am - Bran:

*

The Memes of the Royalest Kind @TheRoyalMemeFamily: rare photo of Arya Stark growing up

*

TO GROUP ‘The Ghost Fan Club (Jon fuck off)’ 

2:11am - Bran: you guys 

2:11am - Bran: anyone awake 

2:12am - Arya: yes but i’m trying to sleep 

2:13am - Bran: too late now fucknuts

2:14am - Bran: you ever think about davos hears the message alerts for this chat and just kinda….dies inside? 

2:15am - Sansa: oh for sure 

2:16am - Jon: I’ve seen his eyes close and pray for it 

2:18am - Robb: once in a meeting, i swear i saw him almost throw his phone across the room cause you guys wouldn’t shut up and he doesn’t know how to mute his phone 

2:20am - Rickon:

2:25am - Davos: i think this is how you kids say it 

2:25am - Davos: mood

2:25am - Bran: DBIGIWEBGOUWR

2:25am - Arya: IUQWBIUBUIBUIBIUNOI

2:25am - Sansa: WTFFFFFFFFFFFF

2:25am - Jon: i’m fucking dreaming 

2:25am - Rickon: I CAN’T BREATHE 

2:25am - Robb: im

2:26am - Arya: WHAT IN THE WORLD IM LIVING 

2:26am - Davos: go to bed

*

The Memes of the Royalest Kind @TheRoyalMemeFamily: a queen can party 

@PrincessSansa: @TheRoyalMemeFamily we stan a legend

Mother of Dragons @QueenDany: @TheRoyalMemeFamily @PrincessSansa i seem to remember this was at least two bottles of wine in for you 

@PrincessSansa: @QueenDany @TheRoyalMemeFamily pretty sure you were 4, but who was counting 

*

@DailyMail: it’s highly inappropriate for a sitting monarch and other royal members to be out drinking and showcasing that online - read the article here 

@QueenDany: @DailyMail 

@PrincessSansa: @QueenDany @DailyMail 

*

The Memes of the Royalest Kind@TheRoyalMemeFamily:Royal bodyguard spotted yet AGAIN with a different model

@TheRoyalMemeFamily: who is he 

@PodrickPayne: @TheRoyalMemeFamily 

*

Arya ‘Not Today’ Stark @AryaStark:

@JonSnow: @AryaStark 👀

@PrincessSansa: @AryaStark 👀

@RealBranStark: @AryaStark 👀

@RickonStark: @AryaStark 👀

@RobbWinterfell: @AryaStark 👀

*

@RickonStark: 

@RickonStark: That’s it. That’s the tweet

*

8:29pm - Pod: so what youre saying is that i’m a chad? 

8:29pm - Sansa: no a himbo is necessarily a chad 

8:30pm - Pod: im more himbo than chad 

8:31pm - Sansa: you can be a chad if you’re not a himbo but you can’t be a himbo if you’re not a chad 

8:32pm - Gendry: you guys know this is the group chat right? 

8:33pm - Sansa: now gendry is a chad 

8:35pm - Gendry: low blow sansa

[gamerwoo]

hiii just wanted to say ur writing is so amazing and ur works are so inspiring pls keep up the good work ur such a blessing :DD

dlksjdslkfj oh my god thank you so much I don’t think anybody’s ever said my writing is inspiring i’m crying at 4:21am

[xavierplym]

I’ve had the sudden thought of a fanfic plot which I’ve been slowly writing. 

First chapter is pretty much written but not really sure what the response is going to be, hopefully good and hope everyone would want more so this is just a snippet of the chapter.

(responses are encouraged. pls respond thnx)

Babysitting duties.

A compelling story between a typical girl, who was in the right place at the right time when getting her internship at Netflix HQ London and is then given the responsibility of being a sudden tour guide for a pretty, brown eyed actor for a couple of months. If you think this would be a pretty simple task like she thought, then you’d also be wrong. As this isn’t going to be a simple love story, it’s also a story of friendships and new beginnings, a bit of heartache and not knowing what the fuck is going on.

1k wordcount

Chapter one.

7:15am, 17th September 2018. A Monday. 

Rolling over with a sigh, reaching for the phone on the bedside table that was just that little out of reach, Olive was just able to turn off the loud alarm with her index finger. Sitting up rubbing her eyes, trying to gain consciousness, she looks to her left and out of the window looking over at the already traffic filled streets of London. Just as she was contemplating going back to a blissful sleep, her phone buzzes.

(7:21am) Mel:

I heard your alarm. You better be up, remember the meeting at 8:45.

“Shit.” She throws her phone and jumps out of bed to get ready, grabbing her towel rushing out of her door.

“Shit, shit, shit!” Running past Melissa, into the bathroom and slamming the door. 

Melissa giggles to herself drinking her coffee, “If you want to leave the house at seven fifty you have about… 4 minutes to shower!” she shouts to her rushed roommate.

“Shit!” 

Melissa only laughs and carries on drinking her coffee looking through her e-mails. 

Olive and Melissa have been living in their small 2 bedroom flat in London for 7 months now, moving from a small town they have both grown up in. Moving out was one big milestone for them, but to move away from home – in a big city? They feel like they’ve skipped several milestones and they haven’t been more excited for it. Melissa got a transfer to a caring facility for the elderly that she’s more excited to work for and as for Olive, she got the great opportunity with an Netflix Internship. It’s no garden of roses, but it’s a big step for the career path she wants to take and now she’s potentially running late to the first meeting she’s ever been asked to attend to. 

“Why do I enjoy sleeping too much? Why couldn’t I of set my alarm for seven like any normal well put together person?” Olive comes speed walking out of the bathroom, wrapped in a towel with her toothbrush hanging out of her mouth. “Why did I think I’d get up straight away to get ready? I never do that! What made me think I’d ever do that?!” Speeding back to her bedroom door, she comes to a halt with a sigh, “You think I’m panicking?” She looks to her friend for some sort of comfort. 

“Absolutely.”  

“That helps a little.” She sighs back to her friend before rushing back into her room. 

-

“Okay!” Olive comes booming out of her room at a record breaking ten minutes later, pretty much completely ready. Melissa watches her roommate with a worried eye while slowly buttering some toast to start her day. Olive brushes down her shirt before putting her hands to her hips looking back at her friend hoping to get an opinion. “Is this fine?” Melissa goes to say her thoughts but then gets interrupted without even saying anything, “Even if it wasn’t fine, I don’t have time to change hahaha I am so fucked. Where are my socks, goddamn it.” Olive continues to ramble as Melissa slowly puts down her toast and watches her friend with an amused look.

“Olive.” She speaks in a calm tone, too much for her stressed friend to hear over the thoughts she’s got running through her head, “Olive…” Still no luck. Melissa laughs to herself and looks over at the clock. 7:43. She turns back to her friend, amused look still written on her face while her friend runs around like a headless chicken looking for socks. “I’ve found two black socks but they don’t match. Do you think that would matter? Oh god, what if that does mat-“ 

“Olive!” Melissa’s raised voice brings Olive to a stop and looks at her roommate.

“The socks are fine. Your outfit is fine and you’re going to be fine. Stop panicking! You still have some minutes before you leave.” 

Olive puts her hands on her cheeks and closes her eyes to calm her nerves before looking at the clock, breathing out a laugh she looks back at Melissa, feeling sheepish.

“You’re right. Sorry, I know this must be too much for this time of the morning.” Melissa only gives her friend a shrug and a knowing look for Olive to only roll her eyes in return.

Another buzz from Olive’s phones takes her attention away, pulling it out of her back pocket she quickly skims through the text she’s just received from a colleague.

“Right…” Putting her phone back in her pocket, she hops on the spot, struggling to put on the unmatching socks. Grabbing her shoes she wears to work pretty much every week she turns her attention back to her friend, “Probably finish work a bit later today so if you’re cooking anything for dinner, some left overs would be great!” rushing over to her bag that was on the living-room table to make sure everything that she needed was in there she was satisfied. Striding over to the counter where both sets of keys are left after a long day, she grabs her set and heads for the door.

“Wish me luck!” Olive sings, letting the door shut behind her.

“Good luck!” Melissa tries to shout back with a bite of toast in her mouth, then rolling her eyes picking up the important black folder Olive always takes to work with her. Not even a second later the door opens again with Olive awkwardly laughing taking the folder out of her roommates hand, then grabbing the toast with the other. “Love you!” Before even getting a chance for Melissa to protest, the door is closed.

AN: I was planning for noah to be introduced into the second chapter as i saw the first chapter is a good way to introduce the main character. Hopefully the idea I’ve had in mind came across and everyone enjoyed it. There’s more to this chapter and I’ll release the rest of the chapter once I get a response to this part.

[donnarider]

!!DISCONTINUED!!  Klance - soulmate au (part 4)

Author’s notes:

update 12th July 2019: This story is unfortunately discontinued. There will not be a next part. I’m really sorry.

Read part 1

Read part 2

Read part 3

“Bold” texts are from Keith, “italic” texts are from Lance

„Wow, that’s… rough?“

„Yes it is! I mean… I meant what I said. I just thought he would...”

“Say that he wants to be more than friends?”

“Yeah…” Lance put his head on the table they were studying at. The library was quiet and Lance had a hard time keeping his voice down while telling Hunk about his horrible not-date date.

“So how did the rest of the da…what happened after that?”

“Well, I was dying on the inside and pretended everything was fine on the outside. So, the usual.”

“Lance!”

Lance sighed and leaned back on his chair. The library’s ceiling suddenly seemed very fascinating to him. “We talked about stuff like favourite movies and such. I asked him about his bike. I had to leave for my seminar and he said he’d text me.”

“Well that doesn’t sound too bad,” Hunk decided and squeezed Lance’s shoulder supportively. “Maybe he just needs some time?”

“And what do I do if he doesn’t? I thought I’d be fine with being just friends but-,” he waved his hands around in a helpless motion. “I was basically doomed when he told me to be nice to my coffee in Spanish. I can’t just NOT crush on him now, you know. And that sucks… big time.”

Hunk smiled sympathetically at him and continued to flip through the book in front of him. “Just take it slow. Take a break for a few days and then invite him to do something and see what it feels like then. He’ll either change his mind or you could just bring me and Pidge along to make the friends thing easier. Maybe that’ll help?”

“Hmm. Yeah, maybe.”

Hunk closed his book and got up. “You up for visiting Pidge and Matt? I don’t think we’re gonna get anything done here right now. Also I think Matt finally got that video game you wanted to play so badly.”

“Nooo, Hunk. You wanted to study. I didn’t mean to distract you, I’m just gonna-“

“It’s fine, Lance. I can’t concentrate anyways. And you helped me so much with my last essay, I think I can go a day without studying.”

Lance smiled at him and got to his feet as well. “Okay. But I swear I’ll be back to normal tomorrow and then we’re gonna take a look at the stuff from Iverson’s physics lecture.” Hunk groaned loudly and made Lance laugh with his desperate expression. “I know, I know. But we both have to get better at that stuff.” He stood behind Hunk and made a gesture over his shoulder like he wanted to show Hunk a beautiful landscape.

“NASA, dude. NASA.”

“Ugh, you’re right. But Matt and Pidge now. My brain needs a break.”

Lance swung his backpack over his shoulder. “Maybe I get one of Pidge’s hugs. I love Pidge’s hugs.”

Hunk beside him nodded. “Everyone does, man. They’re the best.”

Wednesday

 (3:15am): WTF DUDE? ???

(3:17am): I KNOW SORRY! Its our stupid neighbors having a party…

(3:18am): AT T HIS HOU R???

(3:18am): pls kill them for me

(3:20am): I would but prison isnt as appealing to me as you might think

(3:21am): So ur bad boy attitude knows boundaries? ;)

(3:22am): Dont mock me Im too tired for this

(3:24am): Yeh I can feel that

(3:24am): u really dont deal well without ur beauty sleep

(3:25am): Sorry :( And no, I really dont

 (3:31am): KEEEEEEITHH do smth!!!!

(3:32am): I have a test tomorrow !!

(3:34am): OM G IT STOPPED

(3:35am): Keith?

(3:35am): did u kill them?

(3:36am): maybe

(3:36am): KE ITH!

(3:37am): I slipped an anonymous note under their door that I would kill their cat if they didnt turn off the music immediately…

(3:38am): O M G thats cruel

(3:38am): u dont threaten peoples pets

(3:38am): NOT COOL!

(3:39am): chill, I was joking. It said Id call the cops on them

(3:40am): Oh okay good hope ur not just saying that

(3:40am): Also thankk

(3:41am): no problem. Good night, Lance

(3:43am): Lance?

 (7:36am): SORRY FELL ASLEEP!

(7:37am): Have fun at work today :)

Friday

(4:12pm): why

(4:25pm): what? u dont like it? ;)

(4:28pm): no

(4:29pm): oh come on! The queen is my best study motivation!

(4:30pm): please just stop

(4:32pm): KEITH! YOU INSULT BEYONCÉ YOU INSULT ME

(4:33pm): Can’t you study to something normal

(4:35pm): Normal normal or you normal?

(4:36pm): I dont care. Just no more beyoncé please. It’s been hours

(4:39pm): Lance?

 (4:42pm): really?

(4:42pm): Evanescence? That’s mature…

(4:43pm): WAKE ME UP INSIDE

(4:43pm): WAKE ME UP INSIIIDE

(4:45pm): I hate you

(4:46pm): No u dont :)

(4:47pm): STOP THIS MADNESS!

(4:48pm): Hunk says if you come to a college thing with us tomorrow, he’ll stop me for you

(4:50pm): What kind of thing?

(4:51pm): dunno, Hunk wont say, but its really good apparently

(4:53pm): OKAY DEAL NOW PLEASE STOP

(4:54pm): Party-pooper

(4:56pm): Tell Hunk I love him

Keith got off his bike, took off his helmet and unzipped his leather jacket. He headed towards the university building with mixed feelings about what awaited him. He had fought with himself about coming today but eventually the curious side of him had won. Keith wanted to see what Hunk had planned for them and also even if it scared him to admit it…he missed Lance.

Logically he knew that it did not make any sense. They hardly knew each other. But emotionally he just… missed him. He sighed and blinked against the bright sunlight. He lifted his hand to shield his eyes against it and bumped into someone.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to-“

“Don’t sweat it. All good here.” A friendly voice interrupted him. The tall boy in front of him looked him over and tilted his head to the side. „Hey, are you Keith by any chance?”

Keith nodded. “The one and only.”

“Oh, great! I’m Hunk.“ Keith took the big hand he was offered and returned the welcoming smile. When Hunk gestured for them to move out of the sun and stand in the tall building’s shadow Keith followed him thankfully.

“Nice to meet you. Thanks for saving me yesterday by the way.”

“Oh, no problem. Lance can get like that sometimes when he’s stressed. He didn’t mean anything by it. You know… finals and all. He’s a bit on edge around this time of the year.”

“No, I get it. NASA is a big thing, who wouldn’t freak out, right?”

Hunk gave a nervous laugh. “Yah, I guess. So umm, Lance had to pick up our friend Pidge, they should be here-“

“Exactly now.” Lance’s voice interrupted them. He stopped next to Hunk and let Pidge whom he had been carrying just now slip off his back.

“Hey, Keith. This is Pidge. They use they pronouns. I guess you already know Hunk by now.” Lance smiled at him and clapped Hunk on the back.

Keith nodded and raised his hand in greeting at Pidge. Immediately he regretted the awkward gesture and lowered his hand quickly.

“What’s up butter cup.” Pidge replied with a grin completely ignoring Keith’s weird behavior, who in return just raised an eyebrow at their choice of words.

“Lance, why did you carry Pidge here? Did you take ‘pick them up’ literally again?” Hunk asked with his hands on his hips.

“They paid me two dollars.”

Pidge shrugged. “I didn’t want to walk. It’s too early.”

“It’s almost noon, Pidge.” Hunk said while shaking his head but there was a visible smile on his lips.

“Exactly. Way too early.”

“I feel you, Pidge.” Keith threw in. “I had three coffees before I got here.”

Pidge yawned and stretched their arms over their head. “Good thinking. I only had one and I feel dead inside.”

“So, Hunk. What is this thing? Why are we here?” Lance asked and absently patted Pidge’s head while they leaned against him, eyes closed and repeatedly yawning.

“We are here, because today…” Hunk made a dramatic pause, “They are having a lecture about space for family and friends of students and-“

“AHHH STAR CEILING?” Lance interrupted Hunk excited while bouncing up and down, Hunk just smiled and nodded.

“Yep, Star ceiling.”

“What exactly is star ceiling?” Keith asked confused. Judging from Lance’s reaction this had to be the best thing in the entire universe.

“It’s only the best thing ever, dude,” Lance started to explain while taking Keith’s arm and pulling him in the direction of a big building.

“They only do this once or twice a year when they have family day for the freshmen and around finals for the really stressed out students so they don’t go all homicidal and stuff.” They entered the lecture hall and Lance directed them to a row in the back. “It’s basically just a short lecture about space and planets and what we do here at college but at the end they turn off the lights and project stars on the ceiling and walls. Dude…it’s the most beautiful thing ever. It will change you!” He gestured for Keith to sit down in one of the empty seats and sat next to him.

Hunk took the seat on Keith’s other side and Pidge sat next to Lance. It seemed like they were just in time because a man holding a mic entered the small stage. From the corner of his eyes Keith saw Pidge leaning over to Lance and whispering something into his ear. A moment later Lance bent forward so that Hunk and Keith could both hear him.

“Sorry guys, we’re gonna get Pidge more coffee. They are literally about to murder someone. We’ll be back in a minute.” With that they both left the room and Keith was alone with Hunk, which he didn’t mind that much. They had only exchanged a few sentences but Keith already liked the guy.

The man on the stage started talking about the importance of astronomy and explained the different subjects they were teaching. Unfortunately he had a really boring and monotone voice and Keith immediately zoned out. Thank God Hunk was there to keep him entertained.

“I know this stuff isn’t really interesting, especially not when he’s talking,” Hunk pointed in the direction of the stage. “But it’s really worth it. Lance didn’t exaggerate…well maybe a little… but it actually is crazy beautiful.”

“So you three all study astronomy?” Keith asked. This was his opportunity to learn a bit more about Lance and his friends without this nervous feeling he got around his soulmate. Hunk somehow managed to create an atmosphere around him that immediately made Keith feel comfortable.

“Yeah. It was actually Lance who got me into this stuff when we were younger. We met Pidge here on our first day. They are this crazy genius and got into college early. They are only sixteen but way ahead of most of the students here. Turned out they and their brother Matt live in the same building as me and Lance so we hung with them a couple of times and now we’re all basically besties for life.”

“Space nerds unite,” Keith said with a smile.

“Haha, yeah. Basically.”

“So… do you and Pidge wanna get into NASA too or is that only Lance?” Keith checked the stage for a second but the guy was still talking about boring stuff and Keith noticed that a few other people in the audience had started quiet conversations.

“Well Pidge is as good as in, let’s be real. Me… well. Of course NASA is the dream for almost everyone at this university and I would be thrilled… but I’m not as set as Lance if that makes sense. I feel like I could work anywhere as long as I’m close to my friends.” Hunk shrugged and knitted his brows in deep thought before he cleared his throat.

“Lance is working really hard for it though. You have no idea how many scholarships he had to apply for before he finally got a foot in. Didn’t stop him though.” He smiled and Keith could feel how proud he was of his friend. “You know, the first year was rough. He failed an important test two times and was sure they were gonna kick his ass but he studied harder than all of us and now he’s always in the top 5.”

“Wow. That’s really impressive,” Keith heard himself say and immediately wanted to slap himself. Way to sound like a high school fangirl, Kogane. Can we please think before we speak, brain?!

“Yeah it is.” Hunk sighed, unfazed by Keith’s inner distress. “It’s also really hard to watch sometimes though…”

Keith raised an eyebrow at him.

“Not the part where he’s top of the class, no. I mean how he gets there. You can’t imagine how many all-nighters the boy pulls during finals and he always pushes himself to get better. I mean it’s great that he’s improving but sometimes I wish he would allow himself a break.” He stiffened and gave a quick laugh. “I’m talking too much again, aren’t I. Sorry, this must be a weird first impression.”

Keith didn’t say anything for a while and chewed on his lower lip. “Is it really that bad? I mean… I haven’t noticed anything and finals are just around the corner right?” He thought back to the few times he’d seen Lance. He had always looked cheery and well… relaxed.

Hunk seemed to be pondering over his answer for a while. That’s when they heard the door behind them open slowly and Lance and Pidge slipped back into the room, Pidge holding a coffee cup in each hand. Hunk leaned over a bit and whispered just before the other two sat down. “Look at his eyes, he thinks we don’t notice…”

Keith had no idea what he meant by that and was staring at a spot on the floor absently when Lance waved his hand in front of his face to get him out of his trance. “Keith, buddy, my man. They’re about to start, don’t pass out on me now!”

Keith blushed a little and sat up straighter. “Yeah, sorry. Not passing out. Now, let’s see your space magic thing. Hope it’s as good as you made it sound.”

The boy next to him grinned from ear to ear. “Better.”

The crowd around them applauded loudly. Apparently the speech part was over and somebody dimmed the lights, making everyone go silent. It was now completely dark in the hall. Keith could feel his palms getting sweaty. Why was this taking so long? He swallowed hard.

He whispered, almost inaudible “Lance?” but in this exact moment they turned on the projectors and surprised ahhhhs and ohhhs could be heard through the entire room.

Keith threw his head back so quickly he almost hit it on his seat’s backrest.

Lance’s words hadn’t prepared him for what he was seeing now at all. It was truly just… beautiful. Thousands of little stars were dancing on the ceiling and the floor and just everywhere. He knew he was sitting in a boring lecture hall and he felt incredibly stupid for even thinking so but for a moment he really felt like he was in space. His heartbeat sped up and his eyes wander around the entire room so quickly he was almost getting sick.

Keith was trying to take it all in before it stopped. The stars danced around his fingertips as he raised his hand in front of his face and watched. He wasn’t even questioning how the whole thing worked it was just too… too everything. In a good way.

“Sooo, did I promise too much?” Lance suddenly whispered next to his ear.

Keith just shook his head and then turned it to smile at him. “No, you didn’t. This is great! Thanks for inviting me to this.” Lance smiled at him and then quickly turned his head to the ceiling again. Neither of them mentioned that it had actually been Hunk who invited Keith.

Keith was still staring at Lance’s face from the corner of his eyes, watching the stars being projected onto his skin and their reflections in his eyes. He looked so beautiful like this, it made Keith’s head spin. He wanted to say something, to tell Lance how pretty he was but he bit his tongue instead. Just friends he reminded himself.

That’s when he remembered Hunk’s words from earlier and looked at Lance’s eyes more closely. What was he supposed to see? The long eyelashes? The small freckles underneath them? The well blended but thick layer of… concealer? Something clicked in his brain. Hunk had mentioned that Lance wasn’t sleeping enough and pushing too hard. Of course he and many others were unable to tell if they didn’t know what to look for. Lance had covered up his dark circles almost perfectly. Almost… Keith turned his gaze to the ceiling again and frowned. Why was he pretending to be fine? It was normal to be tired around finals wasn’t it? Why was he trying to hide it?

“Ladies and gentlemen, I’m afraid we have to end this now since our time is up,” a voice sounded from the front of the room. “Thank you all for coming and enjoy the rest of your day on campus.” They turned off the projectors and disappointment could be heard all around. Some classical song started to play and people started to shift but the lights were still out. Keith dug his nails into his palm and tried to breathe evenly. It’s fine, he tried to tell himself. They’re gonna turn them back on every second. Only they didn’t.

“Ladies and gentlemen, it appears we’re having some trouble back here. We’re sure everything will be fixed soon,” the voice echoed again. “Always a bit hard to find the light switch in the dark.” The voice said and gave a fake laugh. Some parents laughed as well. Keith didn’t. He gulped and pressed deeper into his seat.

He could feel Lance stir in the dark next to him and a hand touching his shoulder. “Keith? Are you okay?” Before Keith could even think of something to respond with the lights were finally turned back on. Keith let out a very deep breath he hadn’t noticed he was holding until now. He quickly unclenched his hands and turned his head to give Lance a small smile.

“All good, yes. I’m a bit sad it was over so quickly though.”

Lance looked at him questioningly for a second longer before he returned the smile. “Right? I wish they would do this more often!”

The group got up and headed out before the mass of people in the hall could block the aisles. The bright sunlight blinded Keith for a moment when they walked outside and he held up his helmet to shield his eyes. Someone walked into him from behind and he quickly turned around to apologize for stopping in the doorway but it was Lance he was looking at. An elderly woman complained about them being in her way and they stepped aside and walked a few feet to get away from the mass.

“Sorry for bumping into you,” Lance started, “It’s just,” he pointed at the helmet in Keith’s hand. “I didn’t notice before because I was so excited about the star thing but… did you bring your bike?” Hunk listened to their conversation and laughed looking at Lance now. Keith didn’t exactly understand what he thought was so funny and turned to Pidge for help but they were just quietly smiling at the whole scene.

“Ummm, yes? It’s how I got here. I don’t have a car, soo…” Keith shrugged a little lost.

“Awesome! I mean great. I mean...,” Lance scratched his head. “Can I see it?”

“Uhh, sure. I parked right over there.” Keith pointed over his shoulder. Lance didn’t even wait for the others. He was already on his way to the parking lot, almost running. When the others caught up with him he was inspecting Keith’s bike and admiring the details of the machine by almost touching it with his nose.

Hunk and Pidge seemed kind of impressed too and Hunk slapped Keith’s shoulder. “Sweet ride, Keith!” He joined Lance in walking around the bike to get a better look. “Lance mentioned you work at a workshop. Did you build this yourself?”

Keith nodded and then realised that Hunk wasn’t looking at him so he couldn’t see. “Yah, I did. It was the first project I did without Shiro’s help. Took me a while to find all the parts. I could get a better bike if I wanted but I’m kind of sentimental I guess.”

Lance nodded. “No I get it. It’s a bit like it’s your child, right? I mean… you made her.”

Keith smiled. “Yeah. I guess.”

Pidge gave a fake cough to get everyone’s attention and pointed at the bike. “If you’re finished drooling over that can we go get some food please?”

“That?” Keith repeated in a fake hurt tone.

“They’re secretly loving this more than Lance and me. You should see the stuff they build. We should visit you at your shop and just leave Pidge there for a few hours. They’d have the time of their life.” Hunk chuckled at the expression on Pidge’s face after his revelation.

 “Speaking of food though,” Lance looked at Keith and tilted his head, “We thought about grabbing a bite at Planet Altea. You in?”

Keith considered for a moment. He could spend some more time with them and get to know them better. He probably should. Shiro would tell him to… but he also really wanted to go home. The light incident had seriously freaked him out even if he didn’t want to show it. He’d rather calm down at home, alone, where he could stop pretending and no one would see what a mess he really was after such a small thing.

“Sorry, I need to leave. Shiro wants to visit an old friend of his and he’s dragging me along.” Lie. Shiro never dragged him anywhere Keith didn’t want to go. Apart of from that Shiro wasn’t even home right now.

Lance chewed his lower lip. “Ohh. Okay. We’ll text then?” The disappointed look on his face made Keith feel bad instantly.

“Yes definitely. It was really great. Thank you all for taking me.” Let me leave let me go.

Pidge and Hunk said goodbye and they watched Keith take off quickly. Lance waved one last time before he was out of sight, but Keith didn’t turn around to see it.

 Usually driving calmed him down but he felt himself get more anxious with every mile. He was glad he could finally take off the helmet when he arrived at his and Shiro’s place because he could breathe more freely instantly. He put the bike in the garage, unlocked the front door and took the elevator up to their floor. After hastily unlocking the front door and locking it after himself again, he immediately kicked off his boots and headed for his bedroom.  

He’d learned a few breathing techniques during his never ending counseling sessions and was really glad about that right now. After some minutes of leaning against his door he got his breathing under control. His thoughts however where still spinning, so he put his favourite playlist on shuffle and flopped down on his bed.

After a couple of songs Keith took out his phone to ask Shiro when he would be home and noticed he had gotten a few messages.

 (2:17pm): Hey, u ok?

(2:18pm): Getting kind of an anxious vibe over here?!

(2:20): Also thats an awful lot of emo music for someone who insists hes not emo ;)

 Shit. Sometimes he forgot the soulmate connection was a thing.

 (2:33pm): Sorry! Yes I’m good

There was an immediate response.

(2:33pm): U sure? Doesnt feel like it

(2:35pm): Idk

(2:36pm): Maybe not

(2:36pm): do you wanna talk? I can call u

Keith’s whole body tensed. Was he ready for that? Should he lie, maybe say he was tired and wanted to nap or something? Should he tell the truth? He frowned.

(2:37pm): I’m not… good at phone calls

(2:37pm): Np u can just listen and I’ll do the talkin

(2:39pm): that’d be ok?

Keith swallowed. Shiro probably wouldn’t be home for a while and he really needed to talk to someone. The question was if Lance was safe to talk to? Would it overstep the friendship line? Why could things never be easy…

 (2:42pm): yes, ok

 [Incoming call: Lance McClain]

More author’s notes:

This fic on AO3

Yeah after 500 years I finally updated. I could explain at length why it took my so long but it comes down to this: I was stressed, I was depressed, I’m sorry but now it’s finally here! Hooray!

As always a big THANK YOU to @alteanmoonchild for being my beta and for reading every new draft and honestly telling me when what I wrote isn’t good so I can improve and grow. I love us working together on this <3

Thank you to all of you for reading! If you have any questions or feedback send me an ask or dm me <3

Me an my friends finally cosplayed Voltron so if you wanna see me as Shiro and my awesome friends as Keith, Lance and Coran head over to my instagram.

Do you know what keeps me motivated when I so often doubt my writing and don’t know how to continue? Getting feedback! So please reblog, like, comment or even draw fanart. Whenever I read an “I love this” comment it makes me incredible happy! Also one of my goals is to someday have someone draw fanart for something wrote soo... if you wanna do that I’ll love you. Also please tag me if you do.

If you want me to tag you in the next part when I post it, just send me an ask saying so and I’ll add you to the taglist.

taglist: @alyy--caticus @princealektheorange @an-important-nobody @teddyorionpotter @spookyscaryshitstorm @ladythugs @positevelybakerstreet @meganmoo02 @atomicengineerdetective @jishwadun-is-jishwafun @anemoee

[sorrymomandcat]

Wed. November 6 2019

12:21AM I need a new lighters 

8:09AM 

I woke up with that feeling. 

Surprisingly not tired. 

I might be after I cry. 

Goodbye past.

4:33PM I'm starting this in my car on my anxious pressured 'break' at the ever busy Budapest. I'm gonna not. Brb.

4:55PM Okkkk, I’m going to be real with you.

I had a lot of clever ways to open this conversation but I have forgotten them since sitting in my Ferrari having not 1, but 2 smokes. You ever feel like you’re chewing on your own teeth? No? Good, that means you haven’t smoked meth for the past 255 days. To be clear- Cobain, Lampwick & The Joke are all synonyms for a former co-worker. Although the same person, they’re sort of not #mentalhealthawareness. TLDR; the more evolved part of me really hopes this guy is just a mean, jaded fucking asshole because the alternative is that they’re deeply psychotic and likely the permanent kind. Both leave little hope for improvement but the former at least KNOWS that. KNOWS I know. I could do a whole bullet-point slideshow fucking presentation on the red flags I had been seductively blindfolded to through exploitation of deepest nature and a stubborn unwillingness to accept pain and anger & I just might. I might. I might need to! I processed most of it as it was happening, denial was a bitch though. If you come from a place of; neglect, abuse and chaos but decided to assess your damages rather than project them on to innocent and typically pretty wonderful people.. then you need to equip yourself. Even if you took the more outward approach, leaving everyone in your path as empty useless collateral damage.. you could benefit as well. Tell yourself 'I’m only self-improving to gain further access and a tighter hold of my victims’ It doesn’t matter. Educate yourself on the impact of trauma/abuse/upbringing. See what happens to you. @ me. 

5:53PM There’s a lot of Construction Boyz here tonight. They hit on me and I’m all like ‘omg I smoke crystal meth and I’m in an over-sized hoodie at work with obviously contrasting roots growing in.. you have no idea how much I needed this’ hahah. Still, it’s nothing quite like the validation I get from making humble jokes to myself in my neurotic head! Where was I? Oh yeah. The Joke; Lampdick. This motherfucker fucking pulls out a REAL LIFE meth pipe, Chief Leaf right there. Of course CL is through-n-through up to date and real time a best friend without judgement, so it doesn’t reflect on me, but I’ve been fighting tooth (lol) and nail against obvious (but not blatant) disapproval toward this endeavor with Joke.. (of course gaslit with remarks like ‘fuck the haters’ ‘you’re really going to care what they say’ ‘it isn’t their relationship’ .. you’re the hater.. they treat me with consistent respect so duh.. you’re absolutely fucking right-it’s ours-and it fucking sucks because you’re an abusive psychopath.. shove that isolation groundwork technique up your) ? No respect. To pull out a fucking meth pipe after:

Day 1 appreciating we had a different DOC (drug of choice) and agreeing that use needs to be controlled in the best harm reduction sense possible & I firmly disclosed that I am 100% in no fucking way ever going to be okay with anyone-ever smoking meth near/with me. I still barely forgive the fuckers that ever let me do it - and I know full God damn well it was my choice/fault/willing action. I barely forgave myself! For letting them let me! Or that I even let me let them do it! So. No. It was immediately made clear. Day 1.  

Throughout this treachery The Joke made here-and-there comments about like “pass it this way” and “why don’t you save me any” and other repulsively ignorant and juvenile comments and my stance toward the matter remained firm. Which he always met with “yeah I know! I’m obviously joking! I agree! I would never do that to you” Like I was crazy for hardening my responses. Fucker, fucking fucker.

Seeing/hearing what I have vulnerably shared and experienced since the first day I made this choice (and I know not everyone who has/will make that choice is going to have MY experience. I’m not claiming that. I’m claiming ‘I don’t give a fuck what another person’s experience may be - I am not fucking here for it’ - ‘it’s a no from me dawg’ 

Knowing how desperately I am trying AND want AND try to want (some days it really do be like that) to stop smoking crystal. To end-all repair the damage it has done to myself, my relationships and my life. To prevent the inevitable damage that waits if I don’t. 

Not to mention all the attempts at ‘crazy making’ by exploiting my guilt and fear of potential harm: caused by crystal meth. ie; “you’re definitely sleep-stealing my keys and/or moving things because YOU’RE smoking crystal meth, and that shit is BAD bad + your traumatic childhood,’ (that he doesn’t give a fuck about unless using it against me in similar scenarios) ‘so come on. You can’t deny engaging in these behaviors, that I refuse tell you about. You meth-trauma black events out.. you’re not conscious of it because of YOUR big bad drug.” (which it is and I don’t intend to downplay it)

Seriously. These are real events & that’s just scratching the fucking surface. Note: this blog intentionally has NO followers and is ran anonymously. My intention is only to self-vindicate the man made madness I've enabled. Yet STILL it manages to drag into a month and a half of my God damn precious and OBVIOUSLY seriously fucking sensitive time. I feel NO shame for that; for struggling right now. For falling the fuck on my ass/face/faceassfuckhands onto a SERIOUSLY cemented floor! that manages to also be falling upwards into my fucking face! So instead of ceasing upon impact; continuously bashing my fucking FACE in. It fucking happens man. I fucking know that and I fucking own it as shamelessly as is safe to. Not as a way to justify where I am right now - but to foster a belief that I am worth the insidiously meticulous effort that's required to be better. In a better position to improve the quality of how I serve myself and thus actually beginning to serve those around me. Jesus shit what a Joke. I can’t believe I let myself: be treated this way, be ignorant to it, be willing to entertain the idea that maybe it was OK (even warranted).. but between you and me: I find it even harder to believe that another human being - one who has clearly been deeply wounded as well - can see the genuine sincerity of another human being’s soul and heart.. compulsively bleeding from a profundity raw enough to captivate a nihilist.. and humbly exposes it.. with nothing but purity in the regard of inherit human good.. and could intentionally stick their dirty fucking arms vigorously inside and tear at the exposed gauge made faithfully available. I’m not innocent here. But there’s no blood on my hands. I won’t point my fingers but my eyes are staring right at you. I know what you did to me. I did not agree to it. I agreed to taking the risk. Do you know what you did to me? Educate yourself. Wash your fucking hands. 

I didn’t bring any crystal to Budapest today. I didn’t know I was going to begin opening this, or I would have.

= I’ve got to go for a smokes. 

That’s enough for now. 

7:55PM I don’t know wtf but Doug offered me to get stoned and so I did outside but the guys who needed to switch rooms came back and then outside too because they insisted on my break.. Golf was looking for tape and offered me a Tim Horton’s, I said hot chocolate. Then Striped Vest guy also forever chatted and offered me a Tim Horton’s; I said hot chocolate. Still no tape and I tell him about Striped Vest and hot chocolate. He says ok. Meanwhile, Doug and his friend Chevy Lover are shooting the shit too and Doug asked for my number. Well first he asked if I was single. He asked if I was dating anybody LOL first of all I’m stoned and second of all the literal words out of my mouth were ‘everybody’ sincerely believing it as a reflection of my innocent love for life and immediately realizing that was a stupid answer so on reflex I said “no, myself. ha ha no. nobody. nope. that’s a. this guy who was my boyfriend died once. like a long time ago. no. weird. yeah it was wicked. wait what? why? but no. I don’t. not.” and I’ll never forget that or this hot chocolate. 

8:03PM Golf asked me to put his poppy on (dude you’re 51, you’ve definitely done this more than me and I HATE war) so I asked him like, when the war was and what it was called - “Oh no, I don’t know a lot about history” meanwhile a second ago he was like “I guess I should put one on because my Grandpa fought in the war” no that was you. anyways so I’m learning about WW1. You say you remember so much, name 5 of our veterans? #therealneverforget 

Disclaimer: I still haven’t read anything about it, I’m sorry to all relatives of dead soldiers I deeply condolence and RIP. No disrespect. We out here.

8:07PM Damn I really wish I had another hot chocolate.

8:39PM How is it not midnight?

[allthingsteenwolf20]

Momma goes out of town - part two (Pack Mom)

The next morning, Y/N was up bright and early making sure she had time to shower, get ready and make breakfast for her boys before setting off. It was a 4 hour drive to the town where she was needed so the earlier she set off the better. Y/N was in the kitchen with Derek plating up pancakes when the little beta trudged in. “Morning momma”. Liam yawned still tired. “Good morning, baby. Did you sleep well?” She asked putting a plate in front of him as he sat down at the table and pressed a kiss to his forehead. The couple joined him and dug in to their hot breakfast. Once they were done Y/N ran around the loft gathering the last minute things she needed whilst Derek loaded her bags into the Camaro. “Ok that’s everything”. She said closing the door to the bathroom as she headed downstairs and grabbed her leather jacket and handbag that was waiting for her on the coat rack. “Take care, drive safe and call me when you get there. I love you”, Derek told her engulfing her in a big hug and pressing a long chaste kiss to her velvety smooth lips. “I will, I love you too.” She replied with a smile slightly reluctant to let go of him. “I love you, momma. I’ll miss you. Be safe and come back soon”, Liam told her trying to stop himself from crying as he hugged her tight. “I love you too, baby. I promise. Everything will be ok, I’ll call you both as soon as I get there”, she reassured him hugging him tight and pressing a kiss to his crown and then she got into the Camaro and stated the engine, gave her boys one last wave, blew Derek a kiss goodbye and smoothly drove down the path that lead her away from the Hale loft and on to the main road as she started her journey.

“Come on pup, let’s head back inside”, Derek called after Liam. The young beta sat in the living room and turning on his morning cartoons trying to occupy his mind whilst Derek cleaned up the kitchen before joining him. The older alpha sat down beside his pup and put an arm around him in a comforting manner as Liam watched his cartoons. “Derek?” Liam asked. “Yes pup?” Derek responded gently patting the beta’s shoulder. “Do you think momma will be ok?” He asked looking up at the older alpha with his baby blue eyes. “If there’s one thing I know about your momma, it’s that she’s pretty badass and can take care of herself when things get tough. But I also she’ll call us later to let us know she’s ok”. He told his pup. Liam nodded in agreement and went back to watching his cartoons.

For the rest of the morning, Derek saw that Liam was content with watching tv and relaxing so he left the beta as he worked around the loft cleaning up and working on papers in his office. It got to 1:47pm when Derek realised he should be serving lunch right about now. He made a neat pile of his papers to come back to later and headed into the living room passing my to check on Liam before going into the kitchen and turning on the oven so the pre made chicken pasta dish Y/N had made for them would heat up. In a separate bowl he cut up some salad and spooned it onto two plates before adding the now heated pasta dish. “Lunch time, pup” Derek called Liam as he set everything else down on at the kitchen table. “Your momma left us your favourite food. It’s hot and waiting for you. Let’s dig in” Derek smiled as the young beta approached him at the table and sat down digging in. “There’s plenty for seconds, kiddo” Derek added. “Thanks Derek” Liam replied with a small smile.

After lunch, Liam helped Derek clean up the kitchen. Derek could sense Liam’s sadness as he glanced at the beta next to him that was drying the dishes. “What’s on your mind, pup?” Derek asked but Liam shrugged. “You miss your momma, don’t you?” He asked softly to which Liam sighed and nodded slowly. “I miss her too but we can do lots of fun things whilst she’s away. Would your momma let you eat marshmallow fluff from the jar?” Derek smiled as he took down the jar of sweetness and unscrewed the lid handing it to Liam but the shook his head. “Momma said to be good.” Liam replied timidly. “Hey, I won’t tell if you won’t”, Derek replied with a playful wink. “What do you want to do today? There’s still time left if you want to go out and do something?” Derek asked Liam trying to cheer him up but Liam shook his head and sighed. “Ok, how about we watch movies at home and I’ll order pizza for dinner. Does that sound good?” This time, Liam nodded his head. “Ok, do you want to find a movie to watch and I’ll get us some snacks”. Derek told him ruffling his hair as he headed into the kitchen to grab the bag of sweet popcorn before making a call to order pizza.

Derek got into the living room and his phone began to ring and he saw that it was Y/N. It had been 2 and ½ hours since she left this morning so Derek assumed she was at a rest stop. “Look who’s calling, pup”. Derek smiled showing Liam his phone. “Momma!” He smiled. “Hey babe, how’s it going?” Derek asked. “Hey, how are you? How’s Liam?” She asked. “Hi momma!” Liam called down the phone. “Hi baby, how’re you doing?” She replied lovingly. “I’m ok, I miss you”. He told her. “I know, sweetheart. I miss you too. Are you guys having fun?” She added. “Yeah we’re having a movie and pizza night, right pup?” Derek smiled at Liam who nodded his head. “Ooh that sounds great,” she commented. “How’s the journey going?” Derek asked her. “It’s not bad, it’s been pretty quiet. I just pulled in to a diner for a quick bathroom break and to get some food before getting back on the road. I have to get going. I’ll call you again when I get there. I love you so much!” She told them. “I love you too, babe. Be safe.” Derek told her. “Love you too, momma”, Liam told her. “I love you more, baby. Take care.” She told him before hanging up. Liam sighed a breath of relief happy to have heard from his momma again. “See, pup. We’re all good and your momma is fine”. Derek told the young beta as he wrapped an arm around him and held him close.

Later that afternoon, Liam had selected several movies to watch. They started off with X-men: the apocalypse as dinner arrived, continuing with world war z until dinner was finished and Derek cleaned up and they finished off with the hobbit: the battle of the five armies before it got quite late and Derek suggested they went to bed. Earlier Y/N had called again just as she had promised to wish Liam goodnight.

It got to 11:48pm and the now tiresome duo made their way upstairs to bed. Derek went into his room and changed into his white vest top and grey sweats before going to check on Liam in the spare room. He walked to the spare room and knocked on the door asking permission to enter. He saw Liam had changed into his pajamas but sat on the end of the bed playing with his fingers nervously. “Come on, pup. Bedtime”. Derek told him urging him to get into bed. “Night, Derek.” Liam called out to the older alpha. “Goodnight, pup. If you need anything during the night let me know, ok? You know where I am”. He reassured the beta who nodded in response. “Good boy, sleep well”. He told him ruffling his hair affectionately. The older alpha made his way to his room before settling into bed to get some rest.

However it didn’t last long when the older alpha woke up to crying and whimpering during the early hours of the morning. Derek rolled over and glanced at the small alarm clock on his bedside table that read 3:21am. Oh no, Liam. He thought before hauling himself out of bed and headed to the spare room. Derek got to Liam’s room and saw the young beta scrunched up in bed under his duvet, his legs pulled up to his chest as tears ran down his cheeks. “Hey Liam. Hey, pup. What is it? What’s the matter? He asked softly approaching the beta. Liam sniffled and shook his head. "I want momma”. He told him almost whispering. Derek’s heart broke seeing the young boy so upset. He couldn’t blame him. It was his first time away from Y/N. Derek sat beside Liam and pulled the young boy on to his lap and hushed him gently running his friends through the pup’s sandy brown hair. “I miss momma” Liam whined against him. “I know, pup. I know. Try and go back to sleep and we’ll call her after breakfast.” Derek reassured him. Liam nodded in the older alpha’s arm nuzzling into his neck, into his warmth allowing his tiredness to take over. “Derek…” Liam mumbled sleepily his eyes fluttering closing. “What is it, pup?” Derek asked softly smoothing Liam’s hair away from his face and using his thumb to gently stroke his cheek just as Y/N would. “Promis’ you’ stay wi’ me”. The young beta mumbled sleepily against the older alpha. “I’m right here, pup.” Derek reassured him and pressed a kiss to his forehead. He laid the young boy down back in his bed and laid down beside him soon falling asleep.

Y/N had arrived in town that previous evening and headed straight to her hotel room calling the staff at the hospital alerting them that she had arrived and would be able to see her friend, Andrew and fill out any necessary paper on his behalf.

~ the next morning ~

Y/N woke up bright and early to relax and have breakfast whilst calling Derek to make sure Liam was doing ok. “Hey”. She called down the line as Derek picked up instantly. “Hey beautiful, how was your night?” He asked her. She could imagine him working in the kitchen playing up breakfast. “Honestly, cold and quite lonely.” She told him. “Well you know I can fix that when you get back.” Derek playfully teased her. Y/N smiled and rolled her eyes at his flirtatious behaviour. God, she missed him. “Where’s my baby? Put Liam on”. She instructed him. “He’s here. He misses you.” Derek told her before passing the phone to Liam. “Momma…?” Liam called down the line. “Hi baby.” She cooed down the line. “I miss you momma,” Liam told her. “I miss you too, baby. I’m here for one more day and then I’m coming home to you ok? Derek told me you both had a fun night eating pizza and watching movies?” She asked him. “Yeah it was fun. I still miss you. Come home soon ok?” He told her. “I will baby, have a great day. I love you so much.” She told him. “Love you too, momma.” Liam smiled relieved to hear her voice. “So what’s the plan for today?” Derek asked her back on the line. “Well I got here pretty late yesterday evening so I’m just going to make a few phones, stop by a few stores and then head to the hospital. I’ll probably be there for most of the day”. She told him. “Ok, have a great day. Give Andrew my kind regards and I’ll speak to you soon. I love you.” “Love you too, babe.” She told him and hung up.

After getting ready, she made her way to flower shop to pick up a bouquet of sunflowers on her way to the hospital to see Andrew. Y/N and Andrew had grown up together. They were childhood friends up until they went their separate ways after finishing university. Y/N had met Derek during her final year and after clicking instantly and becoming apart of the supernatural world she stayed in Beacon Hills with the love of her life and later become the pack mother to his and Scott’s pack.

She arrived at the hospital and made her way to the ward to see Andrew. She saw him bandaged up and approached his bed. “Hey,”. Andrew replied with a smile. “Jeez, I leave you for a few months and get a call you’re in hospital. This isn’t how I wanted to see you.” She told him placing the bouquet of flowers on his table. “I know, I’m sorry I had to drag you out here. Derek’s not going to let me hear the end of it”. He chuckled. Y/N slapped his arm playfully. “Speaking of my old brooding pal, how is he?” He asked her. “He’s doing great.” Y/N simply replied. “And you’re happy?” He asked. “The most I’ve ever been”. She smiled. “Speaking of happy, I heard you became a mother”. He asked. “Not biologically but yes I did.” She told him with a smile. “That’s great, I’m happy for you. So how is my new godson?” He asked cheekily. Y/N smiled and nodded. “You already claimed the title, huh?” She chuckled. “Of course. Now show me my godson.” Andrew asked impatiently. “His name is Liam”, she told him taking out her phone and showed him one of the many pictures of her and Liam. “You make him so happy”. Andrew smiled at the pictures of Liam laughing and smiling with her and Derek. Y/N sighed contently. “Should I ask about you and Vanessa?” Y/N asked him. Andrew smiled and looked down at his lap. “She dumped me a few weeks ago. I caught her with one of the other guys from work but it’s cool. I’m over it.” He sighed. “I’m sorry to hear that”. Y/N replied with sadness. The two old friends spent time catching up with each other even if it was from a hospital room. Y/N went to update herself with Andrew’s situation heading to the nurses’ station to ask what happened and when he would be able to go home.

~ back in beacon hills ~

It was the early afternoon and Derek sat in the garden on the swing reading an old unfinished book until Liam came out and joined him. “Hey pup, everything ok?” Derek asked putting an arm around Liam’s shoulder gently patting his arm. Liam nodded. “Can we go to the arcade later?” Liam asked the older alpha. “Sure, we’ll leave after lunch is that ok?” Derek asked him to which the young beta nodded getting up to go back into the living room. “Derek?” Liam asked again remembering something. This time the older alpha looked up from his book. “Thanks for last night”, Liam told him shyly. Derek smiled and patted the seat next to him. Liam obliged and sat next to him. “You’re welcome. I know you call Y/N your momma but you’re my pup too ok? Besides I promised I’d do anything to keep you safe. That was a promise to you and your momma. You know that”. Derek told him. Liam smiled and nodded. “Thanks Derek.” He told him again before heading back in to the living room. After lunch, Derek did as Liam asked and took the young beta to the arcade for a few hours to keep him occupied.

~ meanwhile ~

Y/N was able to take Andrew home to his apartment after the doctor had accessed his injuries and prescribed him some medicine late that afternoon. “You can head back tonight if you want”, Andrew told her as he made his way into his apartment. “I’m not leaving you alone on the first night home from the hospital” she told him. He sat down on the couch and put his hands up defensively. “Ok I just thought you’d want to get home to Derek and Liam.” He told her. “They’re coping without me. Besides I came to see you.” She told him. Andrew gave her a list of errands to do that Y/N had to pry out of him. First she briefly vacuumed the apartment, went to the grocery store and stocked up his cupboards and made him two dinner dishes which were kept in the fridge to heat for later. Y/N was done by 8pm and slumped down on the couch next to Andrew. “Jeez, you worked me to the bone”, she joked. “Hey, you offered”. He chuckled. “I’m joking. Do you need anything else?” She asked him but he shook his head no. That night, the two friends watched a Lord of the rings marathon whilst tucking into Mexican takeaway. “Just like the old days, huh?” Andrew stated taking a bite out of his burrito. Y/N chuckled and nodded. “Oh my nurse will be here tomorrow to take over, so you’re free to go.” He told her. “You know, when you get better you’ll have to make a trip down to Beacon Hills.” She told him. He nodded in response and put his hand over Y/N’s thanking her for everything she had done for him since she arrived. Even though she had been called to see him at the hospital, she had fun catching up with an old friend but she ready to head back to her love, her baby beta and to her home.

[justarandomblogforme-blog]

TW SUICIDE SELF HARM ETC

What Happened After 15.6.17 4:47pm You told me, that you didn’t matter, that you were not worth anything. I didn’t know what to say, you meant everything to me. You made me happy, you light up every room you enter. How could you not matter, you had so many friends, you are so friendly. I don’t correct you, I know it won’t make you change your mind. I was right there, right fucking there, when you said that you were better off dead. That really hurt me. I loved you god damn it! Don’t you dare leave me. Not like this. 22.6.17 7:24pm I was doing my homework, I didn’t expect a call. It was an unknown call, I took it anyway. It was your brother, you know your twin? At first, I couldn’t understand what he was saying, because of the sobbing and his speech impediment. Then I finally understood ‘dead’. Dead… you were so young. I burst out into tears and went to your house as soon as possible, it was so far away, but I needed to go anyway. I’ve never been to your house before but from your descriptions I knew where it was. Inside I rushed into your room, I saw you there, limp, in your farther’s arms. Beside him was an envople. I toke it an read it. It was so long, it was at least 6-7 pages long. If only you knew how many people you left out. All around me is the sound of sobbing. I couldn’t help but cry, I’ve been crying ever since the phone call. 22.6.17 8:09pm Your farther left, he found you and cant go back to where he found you. Where he found you pale, blue and limp on your bead next to a few orange containers. Your mother, and step-farther, cant understand why you didn’t tell them, they thought you were getting better. Why didn’t you tell them? They could have saved you. This would all of been avoided. No one would be sobbing. 22.6.17 8:56pm We’ve gone to tell your brothers, We’ve just passed the shopping centre, I want to puke. Why didn’t I talk to you more? If only I answered your text messages clearing seeking help. I look through all our converstaions. I notice things I never did before, they way you didn’t really want to talk about tomorrow, or next week, or next year. Maybe if I had noticed that I would have saved you. I knew you were in pain, why didn’t I do anything. Why did I take fine as an answer? It was a fucking lie and I knew it! If only, I had told you how much you mean to me. If only, I hadn’t have let you down. 22.6.17 9:16pm Your brothers are smoking an drinking. The whole place is a mess and smells like spliff. They’re having a party, having a good time. They would be happy after I tell them… 22.6.17 10:36pm They’re all crying, even Kyle. He was always so strong. They didn’t believe me. They thought I was lying. They didn’t think you were capble of doing that. They’re own little sister. The sister that was always laughing and playing around. They tell me of the time when you fell and hurt your knee and how you hugged you. They all depseratly wish to relive that moment. They all desperately want you here with them. But that’ll never happen. No matter how many times you wish upon a star. 22.6.17 11:23pm I spend the night in your bed, with your brother. We just played there trying to get as close to being alive as we could. We tried to get your smell out of your sheets. It was fading ut it was all we have left of you being alive. The police came, they questioned us. It just added salt to the wound. I decided to wear your favourite sweater. It’s soaked in tears now, but it reminds me of you. I’ll go to school tomorrow. I’ll tell everyone. Why would you come back to me? 23.6.17 2:56am I cant sleep, I keep thinking you’ve home, but it’s just the wind. I’m not tired, I cant be. All I want is for you to be here with me. To give me a hug. That way, I can be with you. But I deserve this pain, I deserve to feel this emmense sadness. I deserve it because I failed you, you asked for help so many damn fucking times, and it just flew right over my head. I look back at old photos and I notice the scars. Oh many scars to you have? Why didn’t I notice them? I knew you did it, but not to this extend… How many times did you need me and I didn’t help you? WHY DIDN’T I FUCKING HELP YOU?! 23.6.17 9: 58am I’m hosting the assembly, i hate public speaking, but you desrve this. No one understands whats going on. I’m not wearing uniform, my eyes are bloodshot, and my cheeks are covered in tears. They’ll understand. Look what you’ve done. My dear, come back to me, that’s all I ask. Nothing else. Your presence is invaluable. 23.6.17 10: 21am Almost the whole room is crying. People are looking at each other for guidance and reassurance, but there is non avalible to be given. The teachers look after some people who are in a herendance state, while they themselves need to be given a hug themselves. Everyone knew you as the kind and friendly girl who compliment everything. They didn’t think you would do this. You of all people… and you call this not caring… 23.6.17 10:59am Your crowd of friends go up to be and ask about you. Everyone is in tears. Everyone is effected. Just my dear, come home. I leave school early, I cant stand the questions. It’s all to much. How did you think I didn’t care? I care about you, so fucking much. I need to release my sadness, I found a blade, I;m going to see if it works. 23.6.17 1:57pm I cant take it anymore. You mean too much to me. I cant be away from you. So I’ve decided to join you. I’m going to you soon my love. I’m going to the city, and I’ll try to fly. My love, I’ll be alright as long as I’m with you. But my dear, I must remind you of what you have done, I’m not gone, 2 lives taken in less than 24 hours. It’ll worth it to be with you.