#ok the verdict’s in i love making these

[bromcommie]

I DIDN'T COME HERE TO IMPRESS NONE OF YOU MOTHERFUCKERS a sam wilson playlist, ft. the hero's journey

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steve | nat | bucky

[storytowrite]

|The FINE Art ~ Hwang Hyunjin|

Theme: Art Student! Hyunjin x Y/N

Warnings: mention of nudity, smut, 18+, unprotected sex, the age gap Y/N is 15 years older than Hyunjin.

Word Count: 5257

Summary: Life wasn’t easy for you. You lost your job, lost your husband who remarried and took everything away leaving you only with an old, sick cat. You desperately needed money. Thankfully, your friend is an art teacher and your body is quite tempting. Especially for the young, talented student.

------------------

“I’m sorry ma’am, but the cat needs surgery if you want it to live longer. We cannot wait long.” The vet said his verdict. Your old cat, Lemon, was ill, and you knew that. The thing was that you didn’t have enough money and you were in a really bad situation. 

“How much is for the surgery?” You asked. 

“It will cost about $3000 in total with all the care.” The vet answered your question and you sighed heavily. Why on Earth does it cost so much?! And more importantly - how will you gather all the money needed? 

“All right… If that’ll help him, please do everything you can. I can’t lose him too.” You said tiredly. 

“We’ll do everything we can to save this little boy.” The vet smiled at you honestly. 

You nodded and left your cat at the vet’s clinic. It wasn’t a good timing for such expenses, but you had to do everything you could to just save your animal. You sighed heavily once again. The previous week was hard and now this. Your life was a mess. You lost the job, since your boss decided to hire “some younger girls” and you were simply too old in his eyes. 

The divorce process was finally over. But unfortunately your ex-husband took everything he could, including your apartment. Because of this, you had to move in with your friend, at least until you get back on your feet again. Fortunately, Lina was happy to help you. 

You returned home wasted and without your cat, which you left at the veterinary clinic. You wanted to cry. Earning $3,000 in a short time seemed unrealistic. Well, because how to do it? 

"Oh Y/N are you back already?" Asked Lina peering at you from above another artwork she was working on. "Everything ok baby?" 

"No, nothing is ok. Lemon needs surgery and I don't have that much money to pay for it. And I still can't find a job. Everything is falling apart for me." You sat down heavily on the couch. "And I also need to find an apartment and..." 

"Woah, slow down honey. I don't mind your company. You and Lemon can stay with me as long as you need, after all, you know that.... And as for work, I think I have an idea." She smiled slightly at you. You knew that kind of smile from Lina's genre of brilliant ideas. 

"Oh no, why do I feel like I'm going to regret this?" You asked, looking at your friend. 

"Don't exaggerate, it's nothing like that.... Besides, we'll both benefit from it." 

"Fine, what's the idea?" You asked, slightly curious. 

"Great... you'll love it!" She clapped her hands. 

After an hour of talking to your friend and her persuading you, you finally agreed to help her with her little project. Lina was a drawing teacher in the art department, and her students were just starting to learn how to sketch real people. They needed a model for this, since the topic was THE FEMALE BODY. 

At first you had a lot of concerns. Lina wanted you to pose nude in front of a group of some of her top students. You had huge objections to this. You didn't feel like showing your body to strangers in their twenties. But you had no choice. The deal was simple, 10 sessions at $300 each, for a maximum of five hours per class. That is, two weeks of work. You were able to do it, right? 

"I don't know Lina, I have to think about it..." You said, glancing at her. 

"Just don't make me wait too long for your answer.... Besides, you have a beautiful body for our age, so what's the problem?" She asked lightly. 

"What do you mean what's the problem? I'm supposed to show off to a group of 20-year-olds? After all, they are children!" 

"Honey, these are young adults. Besides, they are just a few people. I'd rather pay you than some strangers. Think of Lemon. He needs this operation.... And if you prove yourself, who knows? Maybe I'll hire you permanently?" She persuaded you further. 

" Oh, hell no... I'll find a job, eventually." You replied quickly. "But fine. I'll take part in it..." You agreed, sighing heavily. "Just so I don't regret it..." 

"Believe me, you won't and you'll even like it!" She replied excitedly. "We'll start first thing tomorrow morning! Prepare yourself properly, you know, shave and.... " 

"Okay, I'll prepare properly.... Anything else?" You asked in a tired voice, interrupting her sentence. 

"Hm... take some clothes to change into.... And well, put on some nice underwear. Tomorrow we start with the upper body. The students will sketch your torso and breasts above all. Well, and tie your hair in a ponytail, it will be easier to see your collarbones.... But that's at ease, I'll tell you everything exactly tomorrow." She grinned. "Go rest, I still have to finish here." 

You sighed heavily and went straight to the bathroom, following your friend's directions. You still weren't convinced about the idea, but the situation forced you to do so. You felt stress above all. You may have had a nice, fit body, but you certainly weren't used to showing it to strangers. 

After a long and warm shower, you headed to your bedroom, where you fell asleep rather quickly. The next day would be a very long one... 

The next day you got up early, got dressed and did light makeup. You left your hair loose, for now at least. Later you'll tie it up in a ponytail. Your friend had already been bustling around in the kitchen since morning. 

"Good morning! Ready for today's challenges?" Asked a delighted Lina. 

"Mhm, I won't be any more than I am." You muttered uneasily. 

"Oh grumpy... Come on, or we'll be late." Lina didn't seem to mind your dissatisfaction. 

"And breakfast?" You asked. 

"We don't have time... you'll get something on the spot." Your friend waved her hand and pulled you with her to the exit. You left her apartment and headed for the car. The trip to the university didn't take long, but you were getting more and more stressed with each passing moment. No wonder, after all, you will be posing naked.... 

You entered the university and headed straight to the room where the classes would be held. Lina showed you everything inside and once again reminded you what to do and how to do it. Your task was quite simple. All you had to do was show some breasts and sit still on a stool for a good couple of hours. 

The students began to fill the room, and you heard Lina greeting them cheerfully. You sighed quietly. It's going to be a long couple of hours. 

"Dear students, I have a little surprise for you today." You heard your friend's words. "A good friend of mine has agreed to get herself acquainted with us. As I said, you will learn sketching on a living organism.... Y/N come join us and show yourself to our students." 

You took a deeper breath and stepped out from behind the screen. You stressed all over. You stood in the middle, right next to your friend, trying not to catch eye contact with any of the students in the room. 

You quickly swept your eyes around the room. There were eight students in the classroom, three girls and five boys. They looked rather uninterested. You glanced out of the corner of your eye at Lina, who continued her argument. 

"Y/N will be our model today. Please be nice to her, she has never done this before. Today we'll take care of the upper body. Your task is to reproduce Y/N's torso and breasts. We sketch from the neck until we reach this point." Lina showed them exactly how much to sketch. "Y/N honey, take off your top and bra and sit on the stool. Do any of you have any questions?" 

The students did not answer Lina's question. You, on the other hand, with slightly trembling hands, undressed from the waist up and sat on the stool. Your friend even gave you a pillow to make you more comfortable. 

"Great, push your breasts out a little more and..." Lina began to correct your positioning. "Perfect! Okay darlings, you can begin." 

The group of students got down to sketching. You swept your eyes around the room. Everyone was focused to make the best possible representation of your body. Lina walked among the students and glanced at their progress. 

Time passed quickly. The students worked in silence. None of them had spoken a word since they entered the room. They were focused on the task at hand. 

One of the men present in the room caught your attention. You had never seen such a handsome man before. He had noble features, his hair was slightly longer and black. He had an earring under his eyebrow, and a black leather jacket perfectly framed his body. 

You swallowed your saliva. The man looked like a prince, and there was plenty of finesse and elegance in his movements. You honestly couldn't take your eyes off him. There was something about him that attracted you to him, something magnetic that you could not describe in words. 

The man in question noticed your gaze. It was as if he sensed that you were looking at him. He raised his gaze slightly, looking deeply into your eyes, and gently raised his eyebrow. You felt a blush appear on your face and your throat suddenly became dry. A strange feeling welled up in your lower abdomen as he smiled slightly and winked at you. 

"All right my dears. Let's take a break for a while." Lina suddenly announced, breaking the silence that had prevailed. "Let's let Y/N stretch her legs.... Come back here in 15 minutes and we'll continue." 

The students put down their sketches and began to leave the room for the break, and Lina handed you a sweatshirt to cover yourself. She smiled warmly at you in the process. 

"Well? Not so bad, huh?" She asked. 

"It's fine... Although I was stressed." You replied and took a sip of water. "Your students aren't very talkative, are they?" 

"As artists are." 

"I thought there would be more students in the room." You said, sipping water again. 

"Nah, I have a small group. But they are the best of the best.... You could say it's such a VIP class." Lina laughed. "You know, it's an extra class for the more ambitious ones." 

"Oh, now I understand..." You nodded, and your thoughts fled to the mysterious boy with an earring under his eyebrow. 

"Would you like to take a peek at the sketches? The students really sketched your body very well..." Lina took one sketchbook in her hand, belonging to the boy you were looking at. "Oh look, Hyunjin did it the best. That boy can perfectly render every detail.... He's my top-of-the-class student." She smiled proudly. So the boy's name was Hyunjin. 

"Wow... This is amazing." You said, sincerely impressed by the way Hyunjin rendered all the details. He even sketched the delicate birthmark you had under your breast. 

"Right?" Lina asked. "If you ask Hyunjin nicely, he might give you his sketch..." She winked. "He has a real talent, and by the way he looks like Aphrodite herself conceived him. He could be a model, but there's a rule at the university that students can't pose, which is a shame..." She sighed quietly. "I myself sometimes wish I could see..." 

"Lina! This is your student..." reprimanded your friend. 

"I know, that's why I leave some things only in dreams." She laughed quietly. "Hungry? I'll get you something to eat." As she said, so she did, quickly leaving the room.

You sighed softly and your stomach growled. Not eating breakfast before leaving was a mistake. You glanced at your watch. The break was slowly coming to an end and your friend had not yet returned with the promised food. In turn, students slowly began to return to the room.

"Hungry?" You suddenly heard a voice behind you. You turned to look at the owner. In front of you stood Hyunjin, who was a head taller than you. He smiled slightly and handed you a banana. "Eat... you've got another 2.5 hours of sitting ahead of you."

“T-Thank you…” You said, taking the banana from him and peeling it right away.

"You welcome... I wanted to say that you have really beautiful breasts." He said, looking you straight in the eye. "I can't wait for the next few days to see the rest."

"Oh thank you?" You replied slightly confused and blushed slightly.

"Nothing." Hyunjin winked at you. 

"Okay, guys! We can get back to work!" Lina called as she entered the room. "Y/N, please sit down the same way you sat before. Perfect! Remember, there are 2.5 hours left until the end of time. At the end of the day, you should have at least five sketches."

Everyone went back to work. The banana Hyunjin gave you, calmed your stomach for a while. You sighed quietly, sitting half-naked on the stool. Honestly, you were counting down the minutes until the end. 

Every now and then you found yourself staring at Hyunjin, who was working intently on the sketches of your body. You couldn't take your eyes off him. He was too handsome to resist. You didn't even feel that time had passed quickly. 

Lina announced the end of class and let you get dressed. Students slowly began to file out of the room. You watched them leave, saying a quiet 'goodbye'. Your friend approached you after everyone else had left the room."You were great today." She grinned. 

"I'm taking you to dinner, come on! And mentally prepare for tomorrow. We'll show them a little more... Can you handle it?"

"Yes, I think I can... Although I don't know if I want to show them everything." You started.

"Well, tomorrow's plan is legs... you can have a thong, we'll move on to the private parts at the end of the week, and next week we'll have poses... Well, I think you should be able to handle everything easily." Lina continued.

“Mhm, if you say so…” You muttered. The prospect of showing your private parts to students didn't make you feel optimistic, but when you thought about Hyunjin, it didn't sound so bad either...

—-------------------

The week flew by very quickly. The students tried to accurately portray all the details of your body on paper. On Friday, the last day of the first week, there was a class on sketching 'private body parts', as Lina called it. And that meant you had to show your vagina. 

The thought of this did not fill you with any optimism at all. You didn't want to expose yourself so much in front of the students, but Lina forced it on you. To be fair, she did suggest that she would pay you more for the day, so with a slight hesitation you agreed. 

You sat in the room wrapped only in a silk dressing gown and waited for the class to start. Your friend went to talk to the dean, leaving you alone. You sighed quietly and stuck your gaze into your phone, trying to calm your thoughts. 

Hyunjin entered the room, but you were so busy with your social media that you didn't notice his presence. The boy walked over to his stand and unpacked all the necessary items before turning towards you. 

"Hi pretty." He said in a velvety voice, snapping you out of your activity. "What are you going to show us today?" He asked and winked slightly. 

"Ekhm... Private parts." You replied feeling a little intimidated, looking up at him. 

"And you're convinced about that?" He asked. "You look confused and scared." 

"Well, it's certainly quite a step out of my comfort zone.... But I can't back down now." You answered honestly. 

"I understand... If it's any comfort to you, I'll try to replicate everything very accurately." He smiled.

"Thanks I guess..." She grunted. "I've seen your work before. You have great talent," he said. 

"Thank you, beautiful." He smiled warmly at you. "But the credit goes to the model I sketch." He winked, and a blush appeared on your cheeks. "It suits you this colour, you know? I wish I could paint a picture of you. In a red see-through nightgown.... What do you think?" 

"A painting?" You blinked, not expecting such a proposal. "I don't know..." 

"I have to create a portfolio for the final exam.... I've already painted three paintings of my friends, but I still have one left. And you are beautiful. I'll pay." He replied, watching your reaction. 

"I have to think about it..." You replied, but didn't finish the sentence because he walked in on you in mid-word. 

"I understand." He replied and wrote something down on a piece of paper. " Here, this is my phone number, if you make a decision, just text me..." He handed you a small piece of paper with the number on it. "Just don't make me wait too long for an answer, lovely." 

"R-right." You replied and hid his number in a safe place. 

The rest of the students entered the room, along with your friend, who smiled broadly at you. She welcomed the students and gave them the guidelines for the assignment. 

"Well Y/N. Sit with your hands behind your back and push your chest forward a little too. And spread your legs..." She said to you and helped you adjust your position. "My dears, you may begin. "

Sitting apart in front of a group of people has not been one of the most comfortable activities in your life. However, you didn't pay much attention to it yourself. Your thoughts were consumed with Hyunjin's proposal. Should you accept it? He said he would pay, and so far there was no indication that you would find a job.... 

You decided to give it a chance and agree to his proposal. After all, it's just another day's work as a "model." You survived a whole week in front of students, you'll survive being alone with Hyunjin too. 

Before you knew it, the class was over and the students had left the room, and you were free to get dressed. Lina was still talking to individuals while you typed Hyunjin's number into your phone. You made up your mind and as soon as he left the room, you texted him. 

[Y/N]

Ok. I agree.... When do you want to do it? ~ Y/N

[Hyunjin] 

Wonderful news sweetheart! Let's meet tomorrow evening at my place. Remember, red nightgown 😘

 He wrote back almost immediately. You swallowed your saliva. What are you actually doing? 

—-------------------

The next day you went to the address Hyunjin sent you in a text message. You were stressed. You didn't know what it should look like or how long it would take. Your body trembled and your mind wandered into dangerous territory. You felt both apprehension and excitement about the whole situation. 

You stood in front of the door of his apartment. You took a few deep breaths and knocked gently. You waited, listening for the sound of footsteps. After a while, the young man opened the door for you and let you in with a smile. 

"I'm glad you agreed." He said, taking over your coat from you. "Make yourself comfortable... Would you like something to drink before we start? Coffee? Tea? Water? Maybe wine?" 

"Water is enough... Although I won't actually despise wine either." You replied and timidly entered his living room. 

The room was large, definitely bigger than your friend's entire apartment. Not surprising, after all, Hyunjin lived in one of the more expensive neighbourhoods in your city. The white leather furniture, laced with gold accessories, perfectly matched the aura that this man was producing. Everything seemed truly royal. 

"Wow." You gasped in awe. 

"Do you like it? My parents made sure I was comfortable in the city.... Would you like a tour of the apartment?" He asked, handing you a glass of red wine. 

"I'd love to... If I can, of course." You accepted the drink from him and took a sip. 

The boy showed you his entire apartment. He had three bedrooms, but he had transformed one into a studio, and the other was used as a dressing room. 

"Okay, ready for us to start?" He asked as you walked through the apartment.

"I think so." You replied hesitantly.

"Great!" He smiled broadly. "Come on, I'll paint you in the studio... I'll get everything ready and you can go and change in the bathroom. Leave when you're ready. It'll take me a while to paint though... It'll take all weekend, actually. But like I said, I'll pay. $1000 is enough?"

"H-how much?" You were stunned when you heard the amount he gave.

“If it's not enough, just tell me…” He replied, watching you.

"Not enough? I didn't expect it to be so much..." You started. "It's too much…"

"Hmm... I don't think so." He shrugged. "We'll talk about it later... You can go change in the bathroom now and I'll set everything ready here." He said, unimpressed.

“Sure…” You replied and headed to the bathroom.  $1000 to pose? You were shocked. How much money does this young man actually have? 

After a few minutes you were ready. You looked at your reflection in the mirror. You were wearing a slightly see-through red nightgown that hugged your body perfectly and highlighted all your curves. You decided to leave your hair down, but you put a small decoration in it. You fixed your delicate makeup and went out to Hyunjin.

"Wow, you look amazing." He said as soon as he noticed you. "Like I said, this colour suits you very well."

"Thank you." You replied, slightly embarrassed.

"Okay, you can lie down." He pointed to a small sofa in the center of the room. "I would like you to lie down comfortably, and if you want to sleep, just close your eyes. The only thing that matters is that you stay in the position I put you in."

“Sure, I can do it…” You replied and followed his directions. You settled into a comfortable position on the sofa and Hyunjin stood over you. He leaned down gently and positioned your body. His touch was pleasant. You felt the nice warmth radiating from his body.

"Perfect." He said and smiled contentedly. "Okay, let's get started. If you want a break then say so." 

Hyunjin began to paint. You lay there without moving, watching his every move. You began to wonder how it was that your life had brought you to the point where you were. 

Hyunjin painted in concentration, and there was silence between the two of you. You didn't seem to mind. You felt your eyelids become heavy and you didn't even know when you fell asleep. 

You woke up after some time and stretched slightly. It was already twilight outside. You looked around the room you were in. Hyunjin was nowhere to be found. You stood up and stretched your stagnant body again. You were curious to see how Hyunjin's progress was going, but before you could get closer to the painting, the door of the room opened. 

"Oh, you're awake already." Hyunjin smiled slightly. "Hungry? Come, I've prepared dinner." 

Only when the boy mentioned food did you feel that you were actually hungry. You followed him into the kitchen, where delicious smells were coming from. 

"You are handsome, you paint and you cook. Is there anything you can't do?" You asked, sitting down at the table. Hyunjin glanced at you laughing. 

"Thank you for the compliment, beautiful." He winked, at which you blushed. He served you dinner and you began to eat. 

"Enough with the painting for today, it's late." Hyunjin said. "If you want, you can stay the night.... We'll start again first thing tomorrow morning anyway." 

"I don't want to get..." You started. 

"But that's not up for discussion." He interrupted you in mid-sentence. "It's late, I don't want you to go home when it's dark outside.... I'll prepare a bed for you." 

"Hyunjin, but really..." You started again but his one look left you unsure what to say next. "Okay. I'll stay the night." 

"Great." He smiled at you. "Come on, I'll give you something to sleep on..." 

" You know, after all, I can sleep in what I'm wearing." You replied while watching him. 

"Believe me, if you stay in this red nightgown, I won't hold back."  He replied with full seriousness. 

"Oh..." You made a sound. " All right..." 

You followed him to his dressing room, which occupied the other room. Hyunjin walked over to a cabinet and pulled out an oversized hoodie and handed it to you. "It should fit." He smiled slightly. 

"Thank you." You replied with a slight smile. "I'll take a shower." 

Hyunjin nodded and you parted the rooms. You went to the bathroom to take a quick shower, and a pleasant feeling once again settled in your lower abdomen. Hyunjin, on the other hand, was in the bedroom preparing a place for you to sleep. 

After some time, you came out of the bathroom in his hoodie. You could smell his perfume lingering on his clothes. You smiled slightly, to yourself. His scent was so soothing. 

"Do you like the smell?" You suddenly heard his voice behind you, at which you jumped slightly. 

"Y-yes." You stuttered, at which the boy smiled. 

"I have to say, no matter what you're wearing, you're every bit as beautiful." He said, walking closer to you. "I like you Y/N." 

"Thank you, I guess..." You took a gentle step back unsure of where this conversation was leading. 

"When I say I like you, I really mean it." Hyunjin leaned slightly over you and brushed lightly against your waist. You swallowed your saliva as you looked straight into his eyes, your back resting against the wall. Hyunjin was leaning with his hand right next to your head and his body was leaning against yours. You bit your lip slightly and gently moved your legs, feeling yourself slowly getting wet. The situation you found yourself in was definitely not on your bingo card. 

"Hyunjin, we don't..." You began, trying to keep up any semblance of a smile yet. However, his closeness and magnetic scent were too tempting to resist. 

"Shhhsh." The boy moved his thumb over your swollen lips. "You don't even realise how sexy you look right now." He whispered in your ear while biting your earlobe, which was met with a quiet sigh that left your lips. You felt his gentle smile as he moved closer to your neck and gently moved his velvety lips across it. "You like it." He stated, observing your reaction to his touch. "I wonder if you'll like this too." He added and moved his hands a little lower, slipping them under the hoodie. 

"Hyunjin, it's not..." You started, but feeling his long fingers glide across your skin, leaving goosebumps on it, you were unable to control your senses. Hyunjin's lips attacked your neck more boldly, and you tilted your head further back so he could have better access. 

Hyunjin glided his lips along your neck looking for weak spots, and once he found them, he immediately started leaving red hickeys in those spots, which was met with your moans of approval. 

You rested your hands on his torso, and the young man delicately lifted you up, grabbing your buttocks. You put your legs around his waist as his lips found their way right to yours. 

"I want you." He whispered, brushing his lips lightly against yours. "And I know you want me too. Say it." 

"Please." You said quietly. 

"You're asking? For what?" He asked backing away slightly which was met with your disapproval. 

"Kiss me, please." You moaned pleadingly. Hyunjin smiled at you and pressed his lips into yours. His kiss was firm and forceful, but that's what you liked best. You moaned blissfully into his mouth as he grabbed your buttocks tighter. Hyunjin took this as a sign of approval and carried you to his bedroom. 

Hyunjin put you on the bed immediately, finding himself above you. His knee came between your legs pressing lightly on your spot. He leaned over a little more and cupped your hoodie with his hands. 

"You are phenomenal." He said, watching you. His hands moved over every bare patch of your body, exploring every inch of it. Following his hands, Hyunjin placed you on the bed immediately finding himself over you. His knee came between your legs pressing lightly on your spot. He leaned over a little more and cupped your hoodie with his hands. His hands moved over every bare patch of your body, exploring every inch of it. His hands were followed by his lips, which also explored your body. He left wet footprints in his path, interspersed with huge hickeys. 

You moaned blissfully when his lips found their way to your lower abdomen. You felt his smile against your skin. Hyunjin gently spread your legs and moved his hand over your core. Your reaction encouraged him to continue. 

He bit lightly on the inside of your thighs, which was met with your slight jump. His strong hands, however, held your body as his mouth took up your pussy, embracing it completely. 

You moaned loudly and slid your hand into his hair. You pulled his hair gently as his tongue penetrated your insides, melting with pleasure. 

Hyunjin drove you to pleasure, and your body arched in an accompaniment of moans. The young man licked and returned his lips to your mouth, kissing you. You immediately responded to his kiss, hungry for his velvety lips. 

Your hands moved over his body. You wanted to get rid of his clothes as quickly as possible. Hyunjin laughed quietly. 

"So eager, huh? Patience darling, be good and you'll get what you deserve." He said amused and helped you undress himself. Once he was standing naked, you moved your hands over his penis, which was already ready for use. "I don't have condoms..." The boy began. 

" Doesn't matter, I want to feel you, now, right now, please!" You moaned needily. 

"I like the way you are asking." He snarled quietly and slid his full length into you. 

"Oh yes!" You whined loudly and moved your hands down his back as he began to move. 

His movements became faster and less precise. He went deep, perfectly attacking your g-spot. Your and his moans filled the entire room.

"Hyunjin! I…" You started digging your nails into his soft skin.

"Come on baby, cum for me." He groaned loudly. "Fuck!"

"I'm cumming!" You moaned loudly, clenching around him. 

A few seconds later, you felt warmth spreading through your insides. Hyunjin collapsed on top of you after a moment, his head resting between your full breasts. You were both breathing heavily.

“You are my muse." He murmured after a while. "Be my muse forever?"

"With pure pleasure." You replied quietly, gently stroking his back, making him smile.

"You know what? You are the FINE art." He said. "My muse."

And After an eventful night, you both fell asleep cuddling together.

-> Masterlist

[spacebarbarianweird]

Tiny Dhampir

Synopsis: Astarion is spending time with Alethaine.

Tags: comfort, dadstarion, dhampirs, tooth-rotting fluff

Alethaine's age: 3.5 years old

Thanks @themadlu for beta-reading!

Read on AO3

Masterlist

Headcanons

Astarion meditates.

In his memory he stands in front of his tent. It's dark, and difficult to say if it’s night or day. It's always midnight in the Shadow-Cursed Lands.

He has to tell her. He can’t continue like that.

Tiriel doesn’t deserve to be lied to.

Astarion clasps his hands. She will break up with him, and she will force him to leave the camp. And she will be right to do so.

He hears a loud laughter. Tiriel walks into the camp and waves to him. She is so beautiful in her Drow armor that Astarion can’t take his eyes from the half-elven warrior.

Astarion desires to touch Tiriel, to hold her hand, to taste her blood, to feel her warmth.

He doesn’t have a right to do either of that.

“Tiriel!” he finally approaches her. “Tiriel, can we talk?”

She’s just  taken her armor off. “Yes, what is it?”

Tiriel is so close he can feel her heartbeat. Shame burns him; he is preparing himself as if this were   the last conversation between the two of them.

Come what may, Astarion decides.

He confesses. His lies, his ill intentions, his betrayal.

“You deserve something real. I want us to be something real.”

Silence.

Astarion waits for the verdict. It's difficult to decipher Tiriel’s facial expression. Is she sad? Is she disappointed? Will she dump him and go to the wizard’s tent? 

Of course, what did he expect? Tiriel opened up to him and he used her body for his own sake.

“Astarion…” Tiriel says. “I am not stupid. I knew what you were trying to do.”

Astarion stares at her in disbelief. What the hells… He expected any response but not that.

“Are you not angry?”

“Why would I be?” Tiriel stands up and smiles. “Astarion, love, if it makes you feel better, I forgive you, but there is nothing to apologize for. You were trying to survive. And you didn’t know any better.”

“And what does it… mean… for us?”

“It means I love you and want to be with you. It means I want to cuddle with you at night and hold your hand by day. It means I want to help you with your master and I know you can protect me in the fight. If you don’t want to have sex, it’s ok, we can be together without it.”

Astarion is so shocked he can’t say anything coherent. He expected tears, curses, and violence. Instead, there is so much softness he is drowning in it.

Tiriel approaches him, Astarion pulls back, his mind rushes, and he clenches his fists but instead of pain, there is just a gentle hug.

Tiriel holds him in her strong arms, pressing her face against his chest.

Astarion hesitates and puts his arms on her back. He might imagine this but he thinks she is smiling.

That night, she brought her few things to his tent. It was weird to share the bedroll with someone else and not have sex. He remembers listening to her quiet breath, to her heartbeat, and then waking up to her playing with his curls.

Tiriel. His love. His wife. His savior. His partner. His friend. His thiramin.

The mother of his child.

Astarion slowly returns to reality. He finds himself in a comfortable bed, not a bedroll, and with a soft pillow under his head.

Home.

He is at home.

At his own place, his and Tiriel’s, in a distant town far from Sword Coast called Daggerlake.

Astarion feels someone is staring

“Good morning, princess,” he mutters, looking at the ceiling.

A three-year-old girl with long silver hair stands on the ceiling as if she was a bat. Her hair is messy, it looks like she’s tried to braid it herself but couldn’t handle a brush. Her black dress makes her look even smaller than she is.

Alethaine doesn’t reply and keeps staring at her dad.

“How long have you been there?” Astarion elbows up. “Is anything wrong?”

Alethaine’s ears twitch and her lower lip quivers. She looks like she is about to cry.

“Princess, use your words,” Astarion lies back on the bed and reaches his hands up. Alethaine immediately falls in his arms. 

'When will mum return?’ she finally asks. “She's been away for too long!”

Astarion places Alethaine beside him and his daughter immediately nestles in the crook of his right hand. She is so small, so delicate - like a kitten or a porcelain doll, much smaller than the human children in their town.

“She will be home soon. Maybe in a few days. Depends on how stupid her new companions are,” Astarion says and then he hears a fast heartbeat. 

Meanwhile, Aletaine barely breathes and her pale skin is rather cold; she has a natural heartbeat which Astarion adores listening to.

Alive.

Technically, half-alive - Alethaine is a dhampir, after all, but she grows up, she eats, and her heart beats. And what bewilders Astarion is that Alethaine loves being held by him.

“Tell me, princess,  were you standing on the ceiling because you’d forgotten when your mum was coming back or did something scare you?” Astarion takes Alethaine’s tiny hand in his and caresses her perfectly pale fingers.

The lower lip quivers again. 

Alethaine bursts in tears.

Astarion would always freak out when she started crying but with time he got used to the fact that Alethaine cries because she can. Sometimes it’s genuine crying because of a bruised knee, an unfortunate fall from the ceiling, a dead character in a story, or a nightmare. 

But most of the time Alethaine’s cries are her way of communicating she’s been lonely.

Astarion sits up and places Alethaine on his lap.

He manages to decipher a complaint that he’s been sleeping for too long. And also how did he dare not to wake up because she was intensely staring?

“Princess, you are a big girl, look at you, you are almost four! You can spend some time on your own!”

“I am three!” 

“You will be four in two months”

“I am three!” Alethaine insists. She immediately stops crying and now she looks a bit angry. “I am three!”

“All right, all right. Are you hungry?”

She shakes her head. 

“How about you tell me what you want?” Astarion kisses the crown of her head.

The girl sniffs. The other thing that bewilders Astarion is how much she trusts him. She comes to him when she is scared, when she is hurt, when she just wants to play or read. He was sure she would always prefer Tiriel to him - with the warmth of her mortal body. But no! Alethaine’s tiny world consists of two people - her mother and father – and it fits in one wooden house in the underground part of Daggerlake.

Alethaine trusts her father. Alethaine trusts Astarion with her tiny half-dead heart, that he loves her, that he protects her, and that he will never hurt her.

Astarion hopes he will never disappoint her.

The dhampir then jumps to the floor and walks over to the stack of books. She picks up the third one from the bottom, causing the stack to collapse, and hands the heavy volume to Astarion.

It's a book on the geography of the Lands of Intrigue, a faraway southern region – with maps, pictures, and text in different languages.

“This. I want to read.”

“You want me to read to you or you want to read with me?” he specifies.

“Read to me,” she says. “Please,” she quickly adds.

“How can I say ‘no’ to such a well-behaved young lady?”

At first, Alethaine is deeply concentrated on the text studying the detailed pictures of dragons and monsters but with every page, she gets more restless.

She bares her fangs as if trying to yawn and Astarion notices something is off with her teeth. 

“Alethaine, open your mouth,” Astarion asks

Alethaine immediately squeezes her lips and shakes her head. 

“Alethaine.”

“No.”

“Alethaine, I will just take a look.”

Alethaine gives up and obliges. She has a full set of baby teeth but her upper fangs are long and pointy. They grew very early when Tiriel was still breastfeeding her and Astarion suspects those fangs cause a lot of discomfort to his daughter.

The inner part of her lower lips bleeds pierced with the fangs. The upper gums are also irritated as if Alethaine rubbed them.

“Does it hurt?”

Alethaine nods. 

“Why didn't you say that?”

“I don’t know.”

Astarion would sigh if he could breathe. “Let’s go to see the healer.”

It takes an eternity for Alethaine to put on her clothes. She is constantly distracted - either with a spider crawling on the ceiling, with her dolls, or with the book about the Lands of Intrigue. Astarion suspects she does it on purpose.

The most difficult part is to make Alethaine wear warm boots. The dhampir refuses to acknowledge it’s winter and even though snow doesn't fall underground it is cold outside.

Alethaine wants her black shoes - period. And it doesn’t matter that they are intended for summer and that they are already too small for her feet.

“Alethaine, put on your boots,” Astarion repeats for the fourth time.

“No!” Alethaine cries again “I want this!”

“Then we are not going to the healer.”

“Fine! I don't want to!”

“Then your teeth will keep hurting. And you won’t be able to eat sweets. There will be a lot of cakes and candies at Solstice and you won’t be able to taste any of them.”

Alethaine tries to cry once again, but Astarion pretends he is busy studying a spider crawling on the wall. The dhampir realizes she’s lost this round and puts on the winter boots. Then, she stares at her father.

“Is anything wrong, princess?” Astarion gives out a laugh. Alethaine is so stubbornly adorable.

“Daddy”

“Hm?”

“I can’t lace them.”

Astarion kneels in front of her. “And what do we say when we want something?”

“Please”

“Good girl” 

Astarion quickly laces her boots. The rest of the winter clothes are put on without a fight and they finally go outside.

As they walk to the healer's hut, Alethaine rubs her gums, and Astarion catches the scent of droplets of blood. Her blood is different—half-dead. It has a bitter odor, similar to the smell of wormwood. Astarion suspects that the reason dhampirs are immune to vampirism is because vampires get poisoned by tasting the blood of their children.

…The healer, an old halfling woman smokes her pipe outside the hut. Noticing astarion and Alethaine she puts the pipe aside.

“What do you want, creatures of the night? I don’t have blood in storage!”

“Oh I am sorry, I can't hear what you from down there, Kelma”

“Careful Astarion, I am the only healer in this wretched town! Hello, Alethaine, I can see that Dhampirs still feel the cold?”

“Hello,” Alethaine says and smiles, showing her fangs.

The healer invites them inside. Kelma is also the only midwife in the town and it was she who welcomed Alethaine into the world almost four years ago. Astarion remembers that day in every detail. His own fear, the smell of blood, Tiriel’s cries, the newborn’s squeal.

“Where is Tiriel? I thought it was you who made money by dealing with contracts.”

“Tiriel couldn’t say “no” to the prospect of working as a bodyguard in a wyvern-hunting party.”

Astarion sits on the bench and places Alethaine in his lap.

“So what happened?” the halfling asks.

“My teeth hurt,” Alethaine complains. “And my lip bleeds!”

“Open your mouth,” Kelma says and Astarion sees her concern, as she carefully touches the tips of Alethaine’s fangs.

“Is anything wrong?”

“The fangs are too big and scratch her lip. And there is simply not enough space for them.”

“But is it normal?”

“Astarion, you are the only vampire I know and this is the only dhampir I know! I don’t know if it’s normal. All right, Alethaine, I am going to do something, it will hurt for a bit but you will feel better.”

Alethaine glances at her father. Now she looks absolutely helpless.

“Kelma isn’t going to do anything bad,” he assures his daughter.

Alethaine isn’t persuaded.

Kelma takes out a small bottle with liquid and opens it. It probably doesn’t stink that much for the healer but sharpened vampiric senses are immediately averse to it. Alethaine winces.

The halfling touches Alethaine’s gums and rubs the ointment on the delicate skin. The second the healer puts her finger away, the little Dhampir bursts into tears again. Now it’s tears of betrayal because she didn’t expect the medicine to cause an unpleasant sensation. 

“Alethaine” Kelma coo. “You are such a big strong girl, don’t cry.”

“It burns!”

“I know,” Kelma chuckles. “Astarion, don’t let her eat for a couple of hours. And now take your tiny copy, I have work to do”

“What did you say?”

“I said take your tiny copy of a daughter and … oh damn, Astarion, I forgot you can’t see yourself in the mirror. She is your copy. And I am not talking about fangs.”

Astarion shakes his head in disbelief.

His copy? Sure, he knows Alethaine has the same silver hair color and skin tone but the rest?

Does he really see himself in her?

“Daad,” Alethaine pulls his arm when they leave the healer’s hut. “Can we go to the surface? I think it’s already night!”

“Yes, why not?”

As they go to the uppertown Alethaine constantly talks. She speaks about everything she sees, and asks dozens of questions including “Why is Kelma so short if she is an adult”, “Why can’t vampires be in the sun”, and “Why does she have fangs and other children in the town don’t”. It doesn’t seem like she pays attention to the answers but Astarion has an uncanny feeling that everything he says is being engraved in her memory for life. And he should choose words carefully.

“Are you sure mum will come back by the Solstice?”

“I am.”

“Will I be an adventurer when I grow up?”

“If you want.”

It's a chilly night and the prickly stars shine in the night sky. There are barely any people outside—most of the townsfolk are halflings and humans deprived of dark vision. As for dwarves, they prefer the company of each other.

Alethaine’s skin looks almost white in the moonlight.

First, they make a snowman—Alethaine insists on adding pointy ears to its head Then, the dhampir tilts her head up and freezes as if seeing stars for the first time.

Maybe she does. She just hasn’t paid attention before.

“Look”, Astarion points at a constellation. “This is the Circle of Swords - seven bright stars forming a circle. The Goddess Mystra has her divine castle in the center of it. And below it—the Ice Snake.”

Astarion wasn’t into astronomy of any sort but once he and Tiriel hit the night road for twenty-four years after leaving Baldur’s Gate and their former companions behind, he found a lot of comfort in observing the stars. Tiriel taught him all that—how to use stars to navigate in darkness. However, she has always preferred her people’s constellation names: Faeraula instead of the Ice Snake and the Circle of Coins instead of Mystra’s Circle. 

Alethaine listens to him bewildered by the night starry sky. Suddenly her ears twitch and she turns her head away, to the road leading to the town gates.

And then Astarion catches a familiar scent.

“Mum! Mum!” Alethaine cries out.

Astarion doesn’t need to strain his eyes to see Tiriel in the distance. She probably neither sees nor hears them. But both astarion and Alethaine can already distinguish her winter armor, the hood covering her red hair, and a two-handed ax on her back. 

“Mum!” Alethaine cries once again and now it’s enough for Tiriel to hear her.

Alethaine sprints and rushes to her mother. Tiriel kneels, opens her arms and Alethaine jumps in her hands.

Astarion walks toward them as Tiriel smooches Alethaine’s face.

“I suppose I am not the only one in this family who needs to be kissed” Astarion smiles at Tiriel. The warrior stands up holding Alethaine in her arms and kisses him too. First his cheek, then his forehead, and then his lips.

Astarion answers her with the same tenderness. Gods, she is warm even now after spending hours in the freezing winter.

“Dealt quickly with the wyvern?”

“The party couldn’t agree on the strategy and the wyvern burnt them to crisps. I took their loot and left. And the wyvern is flying… somewhere.”

“Oh so you didn’t challenge the wyvern, did you?”

“Hmm, I wanted to fight it alone but then I remembered I have this” she kisses Alethaine’s forehead, “and this,” she kisses astarion once again. “I am a mother and a wife, why take the risk? Besides, there are plenty of monsters I can kill later!”

Astarion takes her bag and the weapon, and all three return to their home under the surface. Alethaine demands to tell her everything about Tiriel’s small adventures and Astarion feels it’s very difficult not to use “bad words” to explain how stupid those companions were.

Astarion grabs Tiriel’s hand tighter, enjoying her warmth. 

Their small family looks normal.

Astarion was stripped away from his normality centuries ago. Dead men don’t have homes. They don’t have wives and daughters. 

But he does.

A gentle ear rub returns him to reality. 

“What happened to her teeth?” Tiriel whispers as they go inside their house. Alethaine naps in her mother’s arms.

“The healer said the fangs grew too early.”

It’s already sunrise on the surface when Tiriel collapses on their bed and asks Astarion not to wake her up even if the wyvern returns and demands a fair duel.

“Come here” Tiriel opens up a thick blanket inviting Astarion. She wraps herself around him like she does since that day they started sharing the tent and immediately drifts to sleep. Astarion tugs her close and relaxes, stealing her body heat.

When she is so close he sometimes thinks his body is warm, too.

--

Tag list

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My little love

It's Christmas!!!!!!!!

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader

Word count: 7.2K

Warnings: FLUFF CITY BABY!!!!!!! Little bit of tears but they're happy ones.

A/N: Finally our sweet Angel and Sweet Boy get to celebrate their first Christmas. I was so excited to write this and just give our favorite Barnes duo the love and happiness they deserve. I hope you all like it and happy holidays!!! Also see end of bottom of the post for some explanations on certain gifts....

Series masterlist

It was your favorite time of year and you couldn’t wait to share it with Charlotte and Henry. The year had its ups and most definitely its downs. It was definitely time for some holiday cheer. You wanted to make sure that everything was just perfect because it was also Lottie and Henry’s first Christmas. Although the kids were excited they still weren’t sure what they were celebrating. Lottie heard the word present and she was on board with the holiday immediately. 

The first thing you needed to do was go shopping for decorations and a tree. You and Bucky took the kids to a tree farm first to pick one out. 

“This one, mama?” Lottie pointed at a tree that was not much taller than her. 

“I think that one is too little, Sweet Angel. We need one as tall as daddy and Steebie.” 

“Is so big.” 

You chuckle as you slowly walk around the trees. “It is big but we have a big living room.” 

“T-wee goes inside?” She looks up at you with huge curious eyes. 

“Yes, and we get to make it pretty with decorations and the presents go under the tree.” 

“I get pwesents?” 

“Of course you will. So will bubba and daddy.”

“An mama and Steebie?” She asks. 

“Yes. Everyone gets presents.” You crouch so that you’re eye level with her. “The best part is getting to buy presents for everyone. Are you gonna get bubba, daddy and Steebie presents?” 

Her eyes light up at the thought of getting her favorite people presents. Charlotte was a gift giver at heart.

“Yes, can buy pwesents.” 

“Then we can have a mommy and Lottie date.” 

“Yay.” Lottie bounces in place and giggles.

“Hey Sugar.”

“Yes?” 

Bucky’s head pops out of one of the rows and smiles in your direction. “Henry found one.” 

Lottie gasps and she runs towards Bucky, who catches her and lifts her up in the air. She laughs and wraps her arms around his neck when Bucky settles her on his hip. You catch up and take his hand so that he can lead you to the tree Henry has found. 

****

“Are you lost honey?” A worker asks Henry. 

“No ma’am, my daddy just went to call my mama to show her the tree I found.” 

“Well it’s a very lovely tree. I’m sure she’ll love it. Are you excited for Christmas?” She gets down to his level and smiles. 

“Yeah, it’s mine and my sister’s first Christmas and mama says we can bake and decorate cookies.”

“Well your first Christmas is the most special. I’m sure you’ll love it.” She says before looking up at you and Bucky. Her eyes go wide when she recognizes both of you.

“Thank you.” You tell her before turning to Henry. “Ok bubs, where is the tree?”

“It’s this one.” He points over his shoulder with his thumb. 

You take a step back and look at it, giving a little hum. 

“Mama is a big t-wee.”

“It is.” You nod as you do a little walk around it. Henry anxiously awaits for the verdict. “I think it’s perfect.” You smile at him. 

“We’ll take this one.” Bucky tells the worker. “Do you deliver?” 

“Yes sir. Where would you like the delivery to be?”

“The Avengers’ tower.” 

She gapes at Bucky before quickly nodding and tagging the tree as sold. “And if you don’t mind me asking, what are the kids' names?”

You and Bucky look at each other, a bit reluctant to answer. 

“We make ornaments with names on them and seeing as it’s their first Christmas I thought they should have one each.” 

“Henry and Charlotte.” 

“Ok. You can meet me in the front in a few minutes. There’s also a hot chocolate bar by the entrance if you’d like to wait there.” She says and makes a quick exit.

****

The four of you sit at a picnic table drinking some hot chocolate and waiting for the worker that helped you. 

“Careful Doll, it’s really hot.” Bucky says as he sets Lottie’s cup on the table.

“Is kay, I wike it.”

“Just blow on the hot chocolate a little bit. We don’t want you to burn your tongue.”

“Kay.” She says before pursing her lips and blowing on her drink. 

Bucky takes a seat across from you, smiling as you enjoy this small moment of family time. Since finding Charlotte all you and Bucky wanted was to be able to go out together and show her, and then Henry, all the good things the world had to offer. Henry and Lottie talk amongst themselves and giggle as they watch people trying to move trees around. Soon enough the worker that had helped you stops by your table.

“Here you go.” She holds out three clear boxes that hold one ornament in each. “Everything is set for delivery.”

One had Henry’s first Christmas and the other had Charlotte’s first Christmas. The third was a surprise, it had The Barnes family’s first Christmas.

“Merry Christmas.” She says and waves at the kids before stepping away again. 

You smile as you look at the ornament and then hand it over to Bucky so that he can see it as well. 

“It’s perfect.” He murmurs before looking up at you. “We should go.” 

You nod and you all finish your drink. 

****

“Wow.” Henry says under his breath as he takes in all of the colorful Christmas lights and decorations everywhere. It’s like he was in a trance. You had to grab his hand to avoid him bumping into people and things. 

“Careful bubs. Alright, now we have to do the second most important thing.”

“What mama?” Lottie looks up at you before she turns to look around the store.

“We have to pick out everything we need to decorate.” 

“Can help?” 

“Of course you can sweet Angel.” 

“Uppies dada?” Lottie stretched her arms out and did grabby hands. It was unusual for her to get tired so quickly but it had already been a busy and exciting morning. 

“Big uppies, Doll.”

Bucky grabs her and settles her on his shoulders so that she can see everything. Lottie’s eyes go wide as she looks over the crowd. 

“Alright, let's get some decorations. First stop is the Christmas lights.”

****

There were boxes upon boxes of Christmas lights and bows and ornaments. It was starting to feel like a lot but at the same time not enough. The kids decided they wanted every color for the decorations and you wouldn’t deny them that. You even picked out a small fake tree that could go in their room. As the four of you walked through another aisle Lottie stopped in her tracks and gasped before rushing to a shelf and grabbing a box. 

“Wook it. Is a goat!” She shrieked. “Can habe it? Pwease.” She clutched the box to her chest and looked up at you and Bucky.

“Of course you can, Doll. But…” Bucky had moved toward the same shelf. “Goats need friends so let’s take another one ok?”

Charlotte was practically vibrating with excitement as she held onto her inflatable Christmas goat. Henry just giggled as she babbled about how cute it was. 

“Alright. I think we have everything we need. Charlotte, can you put the goat in the cart please?” You say as you look over everything you’ve grabbed. 

“Mama, is my goat.” She whines at the thought of giving it up. 

“Sweet Angel, we just have to pay for it and then I’ll give it back. You can hold it in the car too.” 

Lottie pouts but holds up the box she’d been holding for the last half hour. 

“Thank you, baby.” 

Once everything was paid for and put away in the trunk of the car the four of you finally went home to rest.

The goat sat in Charlotte’s lap.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The tree is delivered bright and early. After breakfast you get to working on decorating. Of course Bucky, Henry and Lottie are very excited to help. Steve is even recruited to help by the kids. At the store the previous day you had bought them Santa hats and Charlotte and Henry ran around with them on. 

Christmas music played as Bucky put the lights on the trees and you organized the ornaments. With the help of the kids you decorate around the living room. The inflatable goats were placed outside by the door at Lottie’s insistence.

Once the lights were ready it was time to decorate the tree. Henry and Lottie were bouncing all over the place with excitement as they ran around the tree and hung ornaments anywhere they could reach. The three ornaments you had been given were neatly placed front and center. Seeing them there made you tear up a bit. Bucky kissed your temple as he admired them.

“It’s kind of insane isn’t it?” He murmurs. 

“After all we’ve been through? Yeah. But I’m glad I get to celebrate with you.” 

Bucky’s smile is soft, eyes full of adoration as he looks down at you. He gives you another quick kiss before stepping away. 

“Alright now the most important part of the tree-“

“The pwesents?” Lottie interrupts Bucky. Everyone chuckles at her excitement. 

“No. The most important part is the Star.” Bucky says as he grabs the star out of the box. “Who wants to put the star at the top?”

“Bubba do it.”

“Henry, wanna do the honors?” 

“Yeah.” Henry grabs the star and stares down at it with wonder. 

“Ok, let’s get you on my shoulders bubs.” Bucky nods at Steve who grabs Henry and has him stand on Bucky’s shoulders. 

Carefully, Bucky moves towards the tree and gives Henry time to place the star right at the top. You record the whole thing and cheer Henry on once the star is set in place.

“Doll, come do the honors and turn on the lights.” 

With Bucky’s help she plugs in the tree. 

“Wow.” Charlotte says under her breath. Her eyes are wide as she takes in the sight of the finished Christmas tree. 

You, Steve and Bucky stand in the middle of the living room and admire the completed room before some sniffles get your attention. When you look at the kids you find Lottie wiping away tears and Henry shifting between solid and translucent.

“What’s wrong?” Steve asks as he looks between both kids. 

The question seems to be what breaks the floodgates. 

“Is so pwetty.” Lottie hiccups and runs to Bucky who catches her and holds her close. 

Henry quietly moves to your side and lets you pull him in for a hug. 

“What’s going on bub?”

“I love it, everything is so nice. I never wanna go with the bad guys again.”

“Oh my sweet boy. Daddy and I will never let that happen.” You squat down to be at his eye level.

“I know.” He hides his face on your shoulder as he hugs you. “I just want it to be like this all the time.” 

“We’ll see what we can do.” You smile up at Bucky and Steve. 

“Why don’t we watch a movie?”

“What moobie mama?” 

“A Christmas one of course.” 

~~~~~~~~

The whole team stood in a private section at Rockefeller center. It was the night for the tree lighting event. Tony had always been given an invitation but always declined. This year though everyone was there, including the kids. Your dad, Luke, Molly and Olivia were also there. 

“Make sure the kids keep these on.” Tony held his hand open to you, revealing three pins.

“What are they?”

“I made them for them. It’s to prevent the paparazzi from getting pictures of them.” Tony explains. “I thought it’d be good to give them a little more protection.”

“You’re amazing. Thank you Tony.” 

Tony shrugs but gives you a pleased grin before you turn and call the kids over. Each of them gets a pin placed on their coat. It gives you a little piece of mind that their faces won’t be out there just yet. 

As the show starts Bucky stands behind you, his arms wrap around your waist. Lottie, Henry and Olivia stand at the edge of the private section and dance along with the music. When it’s time to finally light the tree Charlotte is on Bucky’s shoulder. Olivia is sitting on Luke’s shoulder and Henry is standing by your side. You all watch as the tree lights up. Everyone cheers and talks amongst themselves. It’s perfect timing because it starts to snow lightly. 

“Hey kitten.” Ed says as he walks up from behind you. 

“Hey dad.” 

“I was thinking.”

“Uh-oh.” 

Ed raises an eyebrow in your direction. “Careful missy, I can still put you in time out.” 

Henry looks up between you and your dad and laughs. 

“Whatever you say old man. What were you thinking about?”

“The forecast says it’s going to be snowing soon up toward the cabin.” 

“Really?”  Your eyes light up. Now this is a family tradition you’d love to share with the kids. 

“Yup. I was thinking of leaving tomorrow morning and getting everything set up. This year has been really tough on all of us. Maybe it’d be good to spend some family time together. Get these kiddos used to some family traditions.” 

“That would be amazing. We can definitely be there.” 

“Good. I can’t wait.” 

“We should get going, it’s getting late.” You give him a quick hug. “We’ll see you up there.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~

It was only a few days later when you showed up at the cabin. Snow had started to fall just as Bucky parked the car. With any luck there would be enough snow on the ground to let the kids play outside and maybe build a snowman or make snow angels. 

The door opens before you’ve even made it up the porch steps. 

“Gwandpa.” 

“Grandpa.” 

Both Charlotte and Henry exclaim as they rush to hug your father. 

“Hey there kiddos.” He hugs them both before looking up at you. “Hey kitten, Bucky. How was the drive up?” 

“It was good.” 

“Good, good. Let’s get you in here before the cold snaps your toes off.” 

Lottie screams at that and runs inside, exclaiming that she doesn’t want an owie on her toes. You all chuckle before Bucky tells you he’ll get the suitcases and that you should go in. 

“Finally.” Josh announces and he gets up from the couch to embrace you. 

Ever since the team found you and brought you back your family had been more present than ever. Sofia and Joshua, who lived in the city due to being in college, came around the tower the most. There seemed to be some sort of underlying guilt but mostly it felt like they were trying to make up for lost time. 

“Sibling hug.” Sofia announces as she hugs you from behind. 

The hug is finished by Luke who somehow managed to wrap his arms around both twins with you in the middle. You giggle like a little girl as they finally pull away. 

“Hey, Molly.” You greet your sister in law. 

“Hey, Y/N.” 

“Auntie So-So.” Lottie pulls on Sofia’s sweater. “Can make bwaid?” She runs her little chubby fingers through her much longer raven hair.

“Of course I can. How about I give you and Oli matching hairdos?” 

“Yeah.” Lottie jumps up and down and darts toward the room the kids will be staying in. 

Bucky walks in with all of the luggage under his arms. 

“Let me help you with that.” Luke offers and takes the kids' suitcases. “The kids will be in the same room as last time and you’ll be in Y/N’s old room.” 

You and Molly move to the couch as Bucky and Luke disappear further into the cabin. 

“So how is their first Christmas going?” Molly asks.

“It’s going great but I’m constantly fighting the urge to do more. I feel like it’s not enough but I also don’t want to overwhelm them.”

Molly hums in agreement. 

“I just want it to be special, you know.”

“I do but don’t worry about it too much. Those kids adore you and Bucky. Anything you do with them will make Christmas special.” 

“You’re right. We have a whole lifetime to fit in everything we can do during the holidays.”

Ed takes a seat on his recliner while Bucky and Luke take a seat next to you and Molly. 

“So what’s the plan for this weekend?” Bucky asks. 

“Lots of fun.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Hold on, Doll. You too Olivia.” Bucky says as he settles a skate mate in front of each of them. 

Bucky held on to the front of the skate mate as he walked them through what they needed to do. Luke was behind them, making sure they wouldn’t get hurt but also encouraging them. You were further up in the rink with Henry. He was a quick learner and not afraid of falling. Soon enough he was gliding easily along the ice, holding your hand as you did a lap. 

“Did you skate a lot when you were my age, mama?” 

“Yup. Grandpa used to take me to this ice rink, just the two of us. We would skate for hours.” You smile down at him. 

“Do you know any tricks?” 

“I do and I’ll show you.”

You pick up a bit of speed and do a few tricks. It’s a bit easier doing them now with the serum. You call Henry over and show him your jumps and soon enough he’s doing them too. The music changes to something more upbeat and the lights flash and bounce to the rhythm. 

“May I have this dance?” Your dad stops right beside you, his hand stretched out for you to take.

You smile and let him lead you around the mostly empty rink. It was just like when you were little. Your laugh filled the space as Ed turned and dipped you. Soon enough Bucky was doing the same with Lottie and Luke with Olivia. You skated over to Henry and took his hands, leading him around the ice the same way your dad did. Everyone was partnered up and a  new tradition was born. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The morning after the ice rink was perfect. It had snowed all night long providing the perfect amount of snow to be able to play outside. Once the kids heard about the plans for the day, breakfast was a quick affair. Dressed in their warmest and waterproof clothes Henry, Lottie and Olivia head outside. 

You make sure to take videos and pictures of them playing in the snow. There’s laughing and yelling and everything a kid’s Christmas should be. 

“Auntie Y/N.” Olivia calls you shyly.

“Yes Oli?” 

“Can you help me make a snow Angel?” 

“Of course sweetheart. Let’s find a good flat spot.”  You take her hand and walk a little bit further from the main entrance and help her lay down. 

“Mama what you doing?” Lottie asks as she watches you.

“We are making snow angels. Wanna make one?” 

“Yeah.” She does her best to run but the snow is slowing her down. 

Henry soon joins too and you teach them how they should move their arms and legs. A few minutes later the  three snow angels are done and you take a picture of those too.

****

“Don’t let him see you ok?” You whisper into Henry’s ear. He’s giggling uncontrollably as you hand him a snowball. “Don’t let him hear you either.”

Henry nods and disappears. The only trace of him are the footprints in the snow but they’re surprisingly light. From your own hiding place you watch as Luke walks out of the cabin and stands on the porch. He had been the only one to stay inside while everyone played. The whole family was in their spots and waiting for just the right moment. 

“Molly?” Luke calls out after not seeing his wife. “Olivia?” 

“I feel bad.” Molly says. 

“Don’t. He planned plenty of these surprise attacks on all of us.” You murmur. 

You hear the snowball hit him, right in the face too. Henry reappears briefly and laughs before there are snowballs flying from all directions. Luke, Bucky, Josh and Henry take it very seriously and soon enough the four of them are in a proper snowball fight. Teams have been formed and snowballs are flying from one side of the yard to the other nonstop. 

You, Molly, Olivia and Lottie decide to make a snowman instead. It takes a bit of explaining from you and Molly so that the girl will understand that the snowman will not come to life like in the Frosty the snowman movie. They’re slightly disappointed until Ed and Sofia walk out with hot chocolate for everyone. 

You sit on the stairs with Bucky pulling you in closer. His eyes are bright and his cheeks are flushed pink and his smile is beaming. He kisses your temple before taking a sip from his mug. 

“So what do you think so far?” You whisper.

“I couldn’t ask for anything better. Hopefully we can do this next year too.” 

You smile and nod before looking at everyone on the porch, grateful for this moment.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Bucky where are we going?” You ask as Bucky leads you down to the entrance.

“I told you Sugar, it’s a surprise.”

“What about the kids?” 

“Eddie, Sofia and Josh were taking them into town for some shopping and dinner.” He tells you as he grabs your coat and holds it out for you to wear. 

Bucky looked amazing in his dark blue sweater and jeans. His hair which was just below his ears was pulled into a small man bun. He had also picked out your own outfit since he didn’t tell you where he was taking you. Much like his own outfit you had on your warmest sweater and a pair of jeans. Bucky also made sure you had your gloves and a scarf. 

“Let’s go before it gets late.” Bucky opens the door and lets you go first.

The sight before you takes your breath away. Sitting on the front lawn of the family cabin was a beautiful red sleigh led by two black horses. 

“How did you do this?” 

“Luke helped me out. He’s on his own sleigh ride with Molly. Said it was tradition.” Bucky says as you both walk to the sleigh. “Do you like it?” 

“Bucky this is the best surprise.” You turn and smile at him before wrapping your arms around his neck and giving him a kiss. “Thank you. I love you.” 

“I love you too, Sugar.”

Bucky helps you up and you place the blanket that was waiting for you on yours and Bucky’s lap. He takes the reins and leads the horses down to who knows where. It didn’t matter where you went though as long as you got to spend some time with him. You snuggle up to him and enjoy the beautiful winter wonderland before you. The two of you talked about everything and nothing. You told each other of the things you wanted to do as a family and as a couple. It was wonderful to just be with Bucky.

Houses were all decorated and Bucky would slow down whenever you passed one in order to admire it. Soon enough you got closer to town. And just on the edge there were a few figures you recognized anywhere. Before the sleigh even came to a complete stop you turn to look at Bucky with nothing but love in your eyes for him. 

“You’re amazing, you know that. Tonight is just perfect.” 

“It’s going to get better, Sugar.” Bucky says as the sleigh comes to a complete stop.

“Hi mama.”

“Hi my babies. Hi dad.”

“Hey kitten. Having a nice time?” 

“The best. But apparently it’s supposed to get better.” 

“I’m sure it will but you’ll need these two troublemakers and this.” Eddie holds up a picnic basket for you to take. 

Then he helps the kids up on the sleigh. Once they’re settled with Lottie sitting in your lap and Henry between you and Bucky, Eddie sends you on your way. 

The night did end up getting much better. Bucky took you and the kids to a drive or ride through, Festival of Lights. While enjoying the light shows you sipped on hot chocolate and snacked on what had been packed. Henry and Lottie were ecstatic as they pointed out their favorite parts. You couldn’t help the smile on your face as you looked over at Bucky. Both of you with loving looks in your eyes. 

This was the perfect way to end a small getaway with the family.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Mama, why are we taking a picture with someone we don’t know?” Henry asks as he looks at Santa Claus.

“Well it’s Santa Claus, you can tell him what you want as Christmas presents. Then you take a picture, it’s just to have it.” 

“But why would we ask him if you and daddy always get us presents?” 

You smile at that. 

“You don’t have to ask him for anything or take a picture with him if you don’t want to.” You look down at him before turning to check on Lottie and Bucky. “Do you know what you want to ask Santa for?” 

“Yup.” Lottie twists her hips from side to side to make her dress swish. “I wike my dwess mama.” 

“You look very pretty, sweet Angel.”

“Tank you, mama.” 

“Next.” One of Santa’s helpers calls out and you move toward Santa. You give them a piece of paper with the kids names on it.

“Alright Lottie, go ahead.” 

“I’ll go with her mama.” Henry says and takes Charlotte’s hand. 

“Merry Christmas, little ones. Charlotte and Henry, how are you doing today?” 

“Am good.” 

“Good.” 

“Now tell me what would you like for Christmas?” 

They both sit on the bench next to Santa and start listing things they’d love to get. A doll, a new video game, some candy. 

“An I want a huwa hoop.” 

“Oh a hula hoop can be quite fun.” 

“Where did she learn what a hula hoop is?” Bucky murmurs in your ear. 

“That chipmunk song she’s been listening to nonstop.” 

“Oh. I guess I tuned it out after the third time.” You both chuckle.

“An I want-“ Lottie starts talking but then she looks from Santa to you and back, a smile that means mischief on her face. She kneels next to Santa and cups her hand around her mouth to whisper. “A baby sissy.” 

Santa immediately blushes and laughs. 

“Sometimes it takes a while but maybe mom and dad can help with that request, little one.” Santa looks up at you and Bucky and winks.  “How about we take a picture now?” 

“Kay.” 

Santa’s helper sets the kids up and the picture gets taken. Then each kid gets a candy cane and they walk back to you.

“Let’s get you guys changed and then we can go shopping.” 

****

You walked through a department store. Bucky had taken Henry and you were with Charlotte. Although you had already bought the gifts you were meant to give, Lottie also wanted to pick something out for her family.  

She stood in front of a clothes rack, one hand on her hip and the fingers of the other tapping on her chin. 

“Mama, that one.” She pointed at a short black slip dress with a slit to one side. 

You pull the dress off the rack and hold it up for her and she nods happily. Her cart was already full of things for everyone. It was cute how excited she was to go shopping. 

You met up with Bucky, he then left with Lottie and you took Henry. He knew exactly what he wanted to get Bucky. You were in the men’s section and Henry just walked around until he found exactly what he wanted for his dad. 

With all the gifts purchased you meet up with Bucky and head back home. 

~~~~~~~~~

“I have the icing and gumdrops here.” Steve says as everyone sets down all of the ingredients to make gingerbread houses. 

“Alright, let’s start building.” 

“Steebie help me?” Lottie looks up at Steve from her seat. 

“Of course, sweetheart.” 

Clint and Sam get easily distracted by throwing candy at each other to see who can catch more. Tony starts making a gingerbread Ironman suit. Nat and Wanda are helping Henry make something that resembles more of a mansion. 

“What are you making Sugar?” 

“Don’t know, maybe we can make the cabin.” 

“We can give it to your dad as his Christmas gift.” Bucky chuckles.

“He’d love it and then eat it.” 

“It doesn’t sound appetizing.”

“He won’t care.” You look at him and smile. “Now come on and help me put the roof together.” 

There was laughter and lightness amongst the team. Jokes and teasing happened around you. Henry was having the time of his life with his aunties. Lottie looked at Steve like he hung the moon and the stars as he guided her on where to put more decorations. She giggled when Tony leaned in and ate the candy she had been holding. Bucky had to pull the candy bowls from Sam and Clint since they kept tossing them at each other. It was all you could have ever wanted for the kids first Christmas. 

~~~~~~~~~

Music blasted from the speaker in the kitchen. The oven was preheating. There were ingredients everywhere. Everyone’s apron was covered in flour, you could even find flour in Lottie’s hair. It was great. 

“Make sure you keep even pressure.” You stand behind Henry and help him roll out the sugar cookie dough. “If not, the cookies won’t bake evenly.”

Henry was completely focused on his task. He’d double check everything before going on to the next step. 

“Ok now we get to use the cookie cutters.” 

“Can help mama.” 

“Yes you can, come over to this side.” You step back and place a stepladder in front of the counter.

Lottie gets up and looks up at you waiting for instructions. You grab a few of the cookie cutters and show her.

“Which one do you want to use, sweet Angel?” 

“Um-“ she looks them all over before choosing a snowman cutter. “This one mama.”

“Good choice. How about you sweet boy?” 

Henry goes with a stocking cutter. 

“Alright now you just have to press it down on the dough like this.” You show them what they need to do. “Then you pick it back up and do the same thing a few times. You can even change cookie cutters if you want.” 

There’s a little bell that goes off letting you know that the batch of cookies in the oven should be done. 

“I’ll get those.” Bucky says as he walks around the kitchen island and heads for the oven.

“Don’t eat any of them daddy.”

“Yeah, no habe cookies.” 

Bucky scoffs. “I haven’t had a single cookie.” 

“Yes you have. I’ve seen you.” Henry laughs when he turns to see Bucky with a cookie halfway to his mouth. “You see, I caught you again.” 

“Dada. No habe cookie.” 

“I have no idea what you’re talking about.” Bucky says before taking a bite out of the cookie in his hand.

You chuckle and shake your head. 

Recipe after recipe you end up making a nice mixture of cookies. From sugar cookies and chocolate chips to snickerdoodle and crinkle cookies. There was enough to feed the building. 

“Don’t forget to leave some for Santa.”  Henry reminds you as you box some up for the team. 

“Don’t worry, those right there are for Santa.” You point to some cookies that have been separated. 

“Good, I wouldn’t want daddy to eat them all.” 

“Hey!” Bucky pouts. “It’s not my fault you’re so good at cooking and baking. The cookies are too good.”

“Yeah, bubba. Cookies are so yummy.” 

“See it’s not only me.” 

Both you and Henry look over just in time to see Charlotte stuff another snickerdoodle cookie in her mouth. Her cheeks puff out as she tries to chew and she sends a thumbs up Henry’s way. You laugh and finish packing the last bit of cookies. 

~~~~~~~~~

Christmas Eve you spent in your apartment. The four of you watched some movies and listened to more Christmas music. The kids had been determined in wrapping the presents themselves. At the end of it there was wasted tape and wrapping paper and gifts that were poorly wrapped. But they were so excited and proud of doing it themselves and placing them under the Christmas tree.   

****

“Please daddy. We have to match.” 

“I’m not wearing that.” 

“Pwease dada.” Lottie pouted and looked up at Bucky with her big doe eyes.

You held up his pair of matching pajamas seeing as you and the kids were already changed into them. It really wouldn’t have been a problem for Bucky except the pajamas in question were white with little ornaments, presents and characters from The Grinch movie. 

“Please.” You add as you hold out the pajamas the kids had chosen. “Don't be a Grinch.”

“Yeah dada, no be a Gwinch.”

Bucky groans but fails to hold back his smile as he takes the offending clothes and heads into the room to change. You Lottie and Henry celebrate while waiting for him. The kids cheer when Bucky walks back out in his pajamas and Lottie hugs his legs and waits to be picked up. The night is spent playing some board games and watching movies. When bedtime rolls around you and Bucky read Twas the night before Christmas to the kids. They fall asleep quickly and happily. 

****

“Wake up sweet boy.” You rub Henry’s back. “C’mon sweet boy open those pretty eyes for me.” 

“Mama? What’s going on?” 

“You have to come see.” You whisper. 

Lottie was already a pouting mess in Bucky’s arm but the four of you crept your way out from the bedroom down the hallway and stopped short of the living room. 

“Be quiet but take a look.” You whisper to the kids with a smile. By now curiosity had driven away Lottie’s sleepiness. 

Bucky sets Lottie down and takes out his phone to record as she tipped toed toward the entrance of the living room with Henry right behind her. There’s a light gasp from both kids. There in the living room illuminated by the soft glow of Christmas lights was Santa placing gifts under the tree.

“Mama is Santa.” Lottie whispers. 

“I know sweet Angel.” 

“Can we say hi?” 

“Do you think he’ll like my cookies?” Henry looks from Santa to you.

“You tell me.” 

You nod toward the living room and Henry turns back just in time to watch Santa take a bite. He hums in approval, even giving his signature Ho Ho Ho laugh, before drinks some milk. Henry is ecstatic. 

“Let’s go back to bed now before he sees us.” Bucky says as he puts his phone away and the kids run back. 

They were way too excited to sleep now but it was worth it. As Bucky keeps them distracted you stay by the living room waiting for Santa. 

“How excited were they?” 

“So excited, I’ll send you the video.” You look up at Santa and smile. “Thanks for helping with this dad.” 

“You got it, kitten.”

You hug your dad and walk him to the door. 

“I’ll see you tomorrow, kitten.”

“Goodnight dad.” 

You close the door and head back to the kids room and hear them talking about Santa and how they were so excited to open presents. 

~~~~~~~

Christmas morning comes with two little balls of energy. One currently pulling on Bucky’s hand and the other straddling your waist.

“Mama no seeping. It’s Chwistmas, habe pwesents.” Lottie says in your ear rather loudly. 

“I’m awake, sweet Angel but you have to get off of me.” 

“Kay.” She says as she scrambles off of you and the bed. 

“Move faster.” Henry insists from the door. 

They were both practically vibrating in their spots. You turn to look at Bucky who had a sleepy but adoring smile on his face. Henry takes Lottie’s hand and they start running to the living room. 

“We should go before their heads explode.” 

****

Both kids sat by the tree. All the presents you’d finish placing under the tree after they had gone to sleep overflowed. Lottie and Henry pointed at the gifts with special wrapping paper and wondered if those were the gifts from Santa.

“Ok, should we have breakfast first?” You tease knowing the kids wanted to get to the presents.

“No mama. Want pwesents.”

“Please.” Henry looked up with pleading eyes. 

You looked back at Bucky who had a camera set up on a tripod and ready to record. 

“Ok I guess we can open gifts now then.” 

The kids cheer and you all sit down. Gifts are given and wrapping paper is ripped into. Henry and Lottie smile and gasp and cheer as they open each gift. Lego sets and video games, baby dolls and hula hoops. Art supplies and baking items. It was everything they’d wanted. Tears of joy gather in both yours and Bucky’s eyes as you watch the kids get to experience something as wonderful as Christmas. 

“Mama is fo’ you.” Lottie holds out a wrapped gift. 

“Did you buy this for me sweet Angel?”

“Yeah.” She says bashfully.

You open the gift to find a teddy bear, a dress and some of your favorite candy. 

“I love it sweet Angel. Thank you.” 

“So mama no have bad dweams.” She holds up the stuffie.

“Oh baby. You are so sweet.” You hug her tightly and kiss the top of her head. 

“Mama I got you this.” 

You grab the gift from him which was pretty big as well. When you open it you find another bear and a knitted blanket in your favorite color. You smile at him and hug the blanket and stuffie to your chest.

“I think baby and I had the same idea, mama.” 

“It’s ok my sweet boy. I love everything.” You hug him. 

“Fo’ dada.” 

“Thank you doll.”  Bucky unwraps his gifts. One is a very nice watch and the other is a pair of very stylish sunglasses. “These are amazing, doll. I love everything.” He gives her a hug and a kiss.

“Here, open mine now.” 

Bucky opens the gift which is a very nice leather jacket. 

“It’s perfect. How did you know I needed a new one?” 

Henry just shrugs but he has a small proud smile on his face. 

Next you and Bucky exchange what you got for each other. A beautiful bracelet and earring set for you and an expensive bottle of scotch, a cologne you knew he’d love and a rare first edition copy of the Hobbit. 

Even Alpine got treats, toys and at Lottie’s insistence some bows and a cute collar.

“We should have breakfast and meet in the common room to exchange gifts with everyone else.” You said. 

“That sounds like a plan. Let’s go.”

~~~~~~

The whole team and family members gathered in the shared living room after breakfast. Almost everyone was still in pajamas and Sam made sure to tease Bucky about his Grinch pajamas. 

“Alright, alright.” Eddie quieted everyone down. “I think it’s time for presents.” 

Everyone exchanged presents before opening them. Tony gave all the guys, and kids a customized lightsaber, which he had been working on. To everyone else he gave an expensive perfume made specifically for them. Sam gave Lottie and Henry bikes and all of the necessary protections. Bruce gave the kids science kits and even promised to do some experiments with them. Wanda and Nat replaced some of the kid’s favorite things including Lottie’s make up kit and accessories and Henry’s cookbook and toys. 

In turn Henry and Lottie gave everyone their gifts. From mugs to a tool kit for Tony, which he didn’t need but appreciated anyway. Wanda got some sweaters and earrings while Nat got the black dress Lottie picked out and a bracelet. 

Steve was last and you knew he had worked hard on whatever it was that was going to give them. He gave Henry and Lottie their gift bags and he waited anxiously for them to open it. There were two books in each bag. Lottie’s eyes immediately lit up and then watered. 

“Steebie I lobe it.” She murmurs as she looks at the sequel to the Lottie Adventure book Steve had drawn up for her. As well as a copy of the first book, that he had gifted her for her birthday and which was lost when hydra had attacked the compound. 

Her eyes fill with tears as she hugs Steve as a thank you.

“Oh sweetheart you don’t have to cry.”

“Is my fabowite.” 

“I’m glad you like it.” 

Henry opened his gift to find his own Henry’s Adventure book. He rushes to Steve and hugs him as well and thanks him.  

“You’re welcome bubs.” Steve smiles as both Charlotte and Henry cling to him. 

You hold out the gifts that the kids chose for him so that they could give him their gifts. Lottie chose a record player with various records. Henry had opted for a new personalized leather bound sketchbook along with pencils and charcoals. 

The kids played amongst themselves and so did the adults. It was good to be together and be able to share in the laughter and love. 

~~~~~

When the day came to an end and Lottie and Henry were tired and on the verge of sleep, you and Bucky tucked them in. They were mumbling about how much fun they’d had but Charlotte had one complaint.

“Am mad at Santa, mama.” She murmured in her semi sleepy state. 

“Why is that my sweet Angel?” You pushed some hair out of her face and felt Bucky move to kneel beside you. 

“Asked Santa fo’ a baby sissy an no find baby sissy unduh the twee.” 

There was a little pout on her lips as she blinked owlishly at you. 

“Well we can write Santa a letter tomorrow to complain ok?” 

“Kay.” 

“I love you sweet Angel.”

“I love you Doll.” 

“I lobe you mama an dada and bubba.” 

“I love you too baby.” You heard Henry say sleepily from the top bunk. 

With the kids asleep you and Bucky sat in the living room with a glass of wine. You were tucked into his side and you enjoyed the comfortable silence between you two. 

“I’m tired.” Bucky mumbles. “How was this the longest yet shortest month ever?” 

You chuckle and nod in agreement. “It was amazing wasn’t it?” 

“Yeah. I want to see those smiles the rest of my life.” 

“Me too.” 

Bucky turns to look at you. A soft adoring look in his eyes. Then he leans in and kisses you softly. He rests his forehead against yours.

“You’re the best gift I could have ever asked for.” He mutters. 

You smile and kiss him again. 

“Funny, I was going to say the same thing about you.”

Bucky huffs a laugh before you kiss him again. This time leaving him breathless. Neither of you could wait to do this again, to celebrate Christmas again or any other holiday for that matter. Because at the end of the day the best gift you could have was each other and the kids. The laughter and the love. The ups and downs this life threw at you. 

And considering you had been thrown many downs it was nice to end the year in an up with the people you cared about the most. 

Extra notes: So although it's not stated in the main series. For Charlotte's Birthday Steve gifted her with her own book, with Lottie being the main character (as she should be). He did the illustrations and worked with a local children's book author to create a story for her. This was based on an ask that I received and I thought that it would be something Steve would keep adding to. So for Christmas he replaced the one she lost (book 1) and gave her the sequel. He did the same for Henry.

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[scekrex]

Sinner Adam X Pastry Chef, Seraphim Male Reader.

Ok so Adam after the events of season one becomes a sinner.

But his boyfriend who sneaks out of heaven to find him and he does just that. And thankfully he did find him before he did something stupid.

Like going to the hotel he just attacked for protection from everyone who wants him dead. Who's inhabitants also want him dead.

But Reader knows he can't bring Adam up to heaven cause that goes against the rules. So he does the next best thing!

He opens a bakery in hell! Which doubles as a house. Don't question it, it's heavenly magic bullshit.

So now Him and Adam run a bakery with the help of Lute and a couple of exorcists who drop by from time to time.

Ohhhh I fucking love that, them just owning a little bakery in hell that's heaven themed and gives the vibes and is all beautiful. Also reader throwing away everything just to be with Adam? Me. I'd do that.

I'll meet you in hell

pairing: Adam x male!reader

warnings: language, mentions & symptoms of depression

note: not beta read bc fuck you I don't have beta readers

“We have to send our people down there and look for him,” you explained, hoping the other angels in the court would agree. Panic has flooded your eyes and your body language was a little too over the top because of that. Adam was down there, the projection of hell's current state had shown it, the first man was wandering through hell's streets, he was badly injured and had no shelter.

“No, we won't put our people at risk for a sinner,” Sera spoke highly, her chin tilted upwards so that she had to look down on you. “A sinner?” you asked, horrified by her choice of words - it's not that she wasn't wrong, Adam was walking through hell as a newborn sinner, “He’s still our first man!” But your statement was only met by shaking heads and mumbling that sounded a little too close to disagreement. With pleading eyes you looked up to Sera, Emily by her side. The little seraphim was talking to her sister quietly, so quiet that it was inaudible for you and the other angels in court.

“We have come to the decision,” Sera adjusted her posture as she turned towards you, “We can't risk the well-being of our people and therefore the well-being of heaven for the first man. He is not important enough to take that risk.” The panic that had been filling your eyes was replaced by pain and betrayal. The other seraphims had betrayed you, or at least it felt that way to you. With a lowered head you were about to get up and leave the courtroom, the verdict had been spoken and you had nothing to say that would change their mind. Discussing something like this with them was pointless, you should've known, saved time and went down without their knowledge of your location. You had to go down to hell and protect Adam - it wasn't as if the former angel was not able to stand up for himself - he every much was able to do so, you knew that better than anyone - but he was wounded and had no place to stay at, no one to turn to and the fact that probably every single resident of the pride ring wanted him dead was not helping either.

So you nodded your head towards your brothers and sisters, then turned to Lute - Lute who had been the only one to stay by your side. “We’re done here,” you stated as you watched the lieutenant lower her head as she followed you out of the courtroom. “Sir, excuse my curiosity but I assume you will not stay in your seat and wait, so may I ask what your plan is?” You liked Lute for many reasons, her loyalty for Adam was most definitely one of the highest attributes you admired. “I’ll go down myself and make sure he stays out of trouble as much as possible,” you explained, the lieutenant of your boyfriend remained by your side as you opened a portal to where Adam had last been spotted in hell, she was ready to go down with you. And while you normally wouldn't turn that offer down, this time you had to. Your visit in hell would be permanent - you were not going to leave the brunette to himself. “I’m coming with you, Sir,” the white haired woman said as she walked closer to the portal, yet she stopped when your hand gently came to rest on her shoulder. Your soft eyes met her determined ones and you offered her a warm yet genuine smile, “No Lute. Heaven needs you, I will take care of Adam, you will take care of heaven for me.”

The exorcist did not look very pleased with that decision of yours, still she gave you a nod and took a step back from you and the golden portal, “Very well, Sir.” With a little wave you turned around at her words, now facing the portal that would take you to your boyfriend and just as you were about to step through it, Lute raised her voice again, this time the usually so confident woman’s voice sounded somewhat unsteady, “Y/N?” You turned your head to Lute, then she continued, “Tell Adam I miss him.” And with those words she left. Ah yes, Lute always had trouble showing feelings and admitting them to somebody else than the person they were about surely must have been hard for her.

Hell was different than you had expected it to be, you had never personally been down there, why should you have been after all? Yet a creature as bright spirited as you was easy to spot - mainly due to your appearance. So when you turned around just to be tackled to the ground by a familiar first man, you were quite surprised and in shock at the same time, you had not expected Adam to spot you that quickly and act on it. “I fucking knew you would come to get my holy ass back into heaven,” the brunette mumbled as he pressed a kiss to your cheek. You held onto Adam’s body as you got up from the dirty ground - hell had a nasty vibe that you did not like but you’d have to get used to it. This place would now function as your new home due to Adam being not allowed to cross the pearly gates again. “Well, it’s not that easy love, I spoke to Sera-” Adam eagerly interrupted you, “I’m fucking sure she told you to get me in the first place, didn’t she? Yeah, she sure as fuck did.” Though when you shook your head in disagreement the prideful look in his eyes fell and disbelief replaced it. “What? You’re gonna fucking tell me these bitches want me to rot in this fucked up hellhole?” A simple nod was all you were able to give your boyfriend. Yes, that was exactly what Sera and the others had decided was the best solution for not only heaven but also Adam, but how could this be the best decision for Adam when he had been all alone the entire time and would have continued to stay alone if it weren’t for you disobeying the rules? Gently you cupped his face, a thing the first man had grown used to since that was something you did quite often - he still found it a little strange, it felt so intimate and personal while it appeared to be such a casual way of touching your lover. “The court has decided to not let you back in, Adam,” for Adam, this was the first time hearing your voice after his fall, after he had lost his status and home, after he had been convinced he had lost you as well. And despite your words being bad news, he could not help but find comfort in the sound of your voice. “But I won’t let you suffer here all on your own,” Adam’s eyes shimmered with hope and it felt painful to take that little bit of hope from him too, you knew he was hoping you were to smuggle him back into the heavenly realms - but that was a thing not even you as a seraphim could do.

“I’ll stay by your side,” and despite your thoughts that Adam would be highly disappointed, the hope in his eyes remained. You assumed that spending eternity in hell with his boyfriend sounded better to him than spending eternity in hell all on his own. “Well,” the brunette shrugged as he slowly pulled away from your touch, “That works fucking fine by me.” Not that it actually did though, the former angel would have preferred it if you would have taken his ass back to the pearly gates. But if the others were against it, you would make hell his new home instead, simply by spending all of eternity here with him just because you wanted to do so. He knew that if they hadn't done so already, they would properly ban you from the realm you had called home once forever, just like they had banned him. And he respected that - well, at least he thought he did because in his eyes that not only had the cute touch of ‘I throw my perfect life away to be with my loved one’, to Adam that also sounded incredibly stupid. Or at least he tried to tell himself that your decision was stupid - giving up everything to spend eternity with your loved one? Yeah totally not something he would do. Except that for you, he would throw it all away.

-

Getting used to hell’s atmosphere surely was not something that had ever been on your agenda, the air was stinky, the streets were dirty and the only area that felt clean and somewhat fresh was the area around the bakery you had built. The building was huge, shimmered in heaven’s brightest colors and you even managed to let some grass grow around the building that was not only used as a bakery, but it was also the new home of Adam and you. It had been quite some work - not because it was hard to work angelic magic in hell, no that had been the easy part. But due to this building doubling as a house and a bakery, it had taken some planning to not forget something important.

The bakery was not running very well, most sinners were not interested in heavenly food. The creatures down here looked up at heaven like the angels up there looked down at hell, in disgust and despair, not that you blamed them for doing so, they surely had their reasons to think that way. But you had two or three regulars that would stop by every other day and those people surely made your day, especially with one of them being Charlie Morningstar. Adam was not very happy whenever little miss butterflies and rainbows was visiting, but you and her got along quite well and your boyfriend at least tolerated that. And despite the bakery not earning very much money, the both of you had everything you needed, that was the bright side of not having to pay rent, you assumed.

Lute had convinced Sera to do regular check-ups on you, however she had only told the seraphim as an excuse to visit Adam. Don’t get her wrong, she was also glad to be able and pay you a visit, but her and Adam were closer than you and Lute could ever be and her missing her best friend more than his boyfriend was more than normal, not only in her eyes but also in yours. Sometimes she even talked Sera into taking one or two of the exorcists with her, to Sera she would say she takes them with her for defense reasons, in reality they just missed their former leader - and who could blame them? Lute surely did not.

You were standing behind the counter, the first man leaned against your side, wrapped up in your soft wings, his head on your shoulder as he was almost falling asleep. It was still early and Adam was convinced he would never get used to getting up so early in the morning, to him it felt like it was still the middle of the night. The little bell that rang as the door to the bakery opened made him crack one eye open and as he spotted a familiar face, he lifted his head off your shoulder, he remained wrapped in your wing though, not willing to leave the cozy warmth they provided.

“Danger Tits,” Adam beamed at the white haired woman as she entered the bright and heavenly feeling bakery. The vibe of the building you had created was different from the rest of hell, whenever Lute entered the inviting looking building she felt like you had brought a piece of heaven to hell. And while she still disliked Charlie’s idea of rehabilitation, she did like the fact that you made hell a little nicer - at least for Adam’s sake. That way she knew the first man was able to live a somewhat good afterlife, even with his soul stuck in hell.

[reallyromealone]

Ok Rome hear me out omega Mikey who has a son that goes to daycare or preschool with omega Reader as teacher and son is like why isn’t he my other dad yet? While Mikey is just trying to look cool in front of reader but just making a fool of himself trying to get a date 👀

It's the fact that I have been thinking the same idea wt

Also, would y'all consider following me on twitch? It would really mean a lot and would really help me out as I only need 11 followers to hit affiliate

Mikey was down bad for his sons preschool teacher (name) (lastname).

The Omega was so fucking fine and Mikey was so hopelessly in love with the Omega.

"Mr.(lastname)!" (Sons name) squealed out as he got out of the motorcycle car seat and onto the ground, rushing to the teacher "oh hello! How was your weekend?" (Name) asked crouching before the pup who swayed his body happily "it was good! Papa took me to work!"

"Really that must have been fun!"

"It was! He and uncle Iza took me to a fancy redront!"

"It's restaurant bud" Mikey said walking up to the two from his motorcycle with a lopsided grin, raking his hand through his hair as he tried to look cool...only to trip over the little backpack his son dropped a few feet away.

"Mr Sano! Are you alright!" (Name) rushed to the tattooed man with the tiny pup "I'm alright... Just fell for you I suppose" Mikey tried playing it off but his bloody nose said other wise.

The gang leader was not looking really cool infront of the pretty omega who led him into the nurses office "the nurse isn't here yet so let me fix you up--here (sons name), why don't you help me by counting these stickers so we have enough today"

"Ok Mr.(lastname)!" The pup loved helping as he immediately tried counting, the two adults knowing he would not get far as he was still figuring out numbers past 7.

"Ok let's clean you up" (name) said getting the things needed and gently began cleaning the blood off Mikey's face, getting close and the Alpha could smell the pharamones off (name) and it took everything in him not to press his face into his neck for both the reason of that would be embarrassing as hell and he was covered in blood.

"Now we only have (cartoon) and (other cartoon) bandaids so what one do you want Mr. Sano?" (Name) asked with a smile and Mikey pretended to give it deep thought before pointing to a box "Excellent choice!"

(Name) gently patched the Alpha up "there, good as new!"

Mikey watched as (name) grabbed two lollies from a bowl and handed one to Mikey and one to the pup who squealed at the treat "Mr.(lastname), why aren't you also my papa?" The little boy asked curiously and (name) didn't know how to respond to the boy "well usually it starts with a date before it can get to that bud" Mikey said to his kid who slwoly nodded "well why you guys not dating!" The boy asked frustrated "I'm working on it kiddo" Mikey said "go to class yeah? I'll return your teacher in a second"

The toddler huffed and wandered off to class, giving his dad a look before closing the door "kids really just say whatever" Mikey said, feeling as if his chance was ruined and (name) just smiled "if you don't wanna see me again that's fine"

"Hey now, can't give my verdict till we go on this so called date"

"Really?" Mikey asked and (name) couldn't help but find the man cute covered in Band-Aids and a slight black eye and (name) just shrugged "here's my number, call me?"

Mikey was so down bad for the Omega who wrote his number on Mikey's hand and wandered out.

He was gonna fucking marry him.

[whats-it-mean]

hi hii! may i request either 03 or 09 (or john !! whichever u think would be most interesting) x reader going through the effects of the unforgiven veredict？

if what i mean isnt understandable i can explain further

Innocent in their eyes ☆

Fuuta Kajiyama + Mikoto Kayano (separate) x reader 

A/N - Fuuta is my cat. i love him. Hope its ok i went with mikoto rather than john, but i’ve been wanting to write for the silly boy for a bit so i took this as a bit of an excuse to do so ^^ (john does kinda make an appearance tho)

C/W - Anxiety, hearing voices

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ─── Fuuta Kajiyama

Any concern he had for his own well being was gone in an instant as Fuuta rushed to your figure, you being curled up and shaking in the corner of your cell. In a matter of seconds, his arms were wrapped around you and you were brought right up against his chest, his breathing just as rapid as yours as your tears wet his clothes.

You sputtered out a faint apology, followed by ‘this is my fault’, and the boy practically shattered. He desperately tried to pull you closer, burying his face in your shoulder as he held you.

“Shut up. No it’s not.” His voice was almost frantic as he spoke. “It’s not your fault, okay? Don’t.. don’t say that.”

For the first time in a while, it felt like the voices constantly condemning you hushed while Fuuta hugged you on the floor. It was comfortably silent as he simply held you, breathing heavily from the way he ran immediately to you from where he’d been upon hearing about tour verdict.

He knew full well how awful it was, the way the voices never stopped, the way it felt like you were constantly being watched, being judged. The pain was almost unbearable for him, but the idea of you suffering through that brought out a side of him nobody ever saw. He was scared- All he ever wanted was to make sure you were okay and safe, and the idea of you having to suffer through the anguish of a guilty verdict was worse than his own.

You let out a weak smile as his breathing finally started to slow back to a normal pace, and felt yourself leaning into his hold. “….Thank you.”

A slight calm washed over him as he heard your voice, and his grip tightened. “It wasn’t your fault. You.. You aren’t guilty, okay?”

He sighed, smiling against your shoulder as he hugged you.

“You’re as innocent as can be as far as i see it.”

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ─── Mikoto Kayano

No words were spoken as Mikoto slid himself next to you on your mattress, quietly offering you a mug of hot chocolate with a tired smile. He leaned over you slightly, placing his arm on your shoulder and let his fingers play around with your hair. All you could bring yourself to do was stare into the mug, but you laid your head on Mikoto’s shoulder in a small show of gratitude.

“You know..” His voice was quiet as he spoke, just loud enough for you to hear. “Es is wrong. We’re gonna get out of here soon, okay? I promise.”

With the hand that wasn't already busy with your hair, you felt his fingers entwine with yours as he squeezed your hand ever so slightly. He was convinced even before now that the verdicts given by Es weren’t accurate- As far as Mikoto knew, both of you were there by mistake, but that didn’t stop the turmoil that came with being deemed guilty.

For days since receiving the verdict, you had stayed holed up in your cell. You wouldn't even leave for meals, and so Mikoto coming by like this with food and drinks had become a routine over the past few days. He was the only one you were willing to see at the time, and even then you barely spoke to him, just sitting next to him and taking in all the warmth he had to offer to distract you from the pain.

And watching you go through that triggered emotions in him he hasn’t had to deal with in a long time.

He couldn’t remember any of it, but some of the other prisoners told him he’d even gotten into a fistfight trying to stop Kotoko from hurting you. And even without memory of the fact, as he sat here, your hand in his with him whispering any sort of encouragement he could to you, there was no doubt about it;

You didn’t deserve this, and while he may not know it yet, you could tell he was gonna be doing something about it later.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ─── End

[forever-girly]

A Sweet and Sentimental Journey of a Boy’s Life Forever Changed… 🩷

A Judge’s Orders must be followed…

“No fucking way!” I shouted so loud, my voice could be heard outside the courtroom.

I couldn’t believe what the judge was saying! She was sentencing me to “Class-A Sissy Indoctrination".

I knew what this was, everyone knew.

It’s a State law saying that a guardian appointed by a judge could incarcerate a person to their control and mandate the wayward young to become a sissy. It was legal and happens way to often since there is no room in our jails.

Society approves of this treatment.

I was weak in my knees, sick to my stomach, crying uncontrollable when my mother said she would accept this verdict and assume State custody of me. I knew right then my life was over.

I begged the judge not to do this. I offered to spend time in jail, or do public service. The judge smiled and said that I will accept her sentence and I will do public service too.

The judge slammed the gavel down and yelled out, next case. I knew I was done as my mother and the guard lead me out of the courtroom.

Mom and our lawyer took me to a small room to try to calm me down. I was crying, weak and beside myself.

My lawyer tried to explain this was a good sentence and I would be thankful for it in the long run. Being a sissy with your mom in charge will not be all that bad compared to jail, she said.

Made me think of a boy in my school who went through this, he danced around school in his dress, hair in pigtails, high heels, and purse with such joy and girly manners. He is such a sissy, he even talks like a girl. Oh, god will this happen to me?

Mom tried to console me saying all will be ok. At least I was not going to jail.

Just then the lawyer said to my mom that if he can't accept his new sentence or he makes your life miserable, the judge could prescribe a treatment to help him accept what was happening to him.

Mom tried to reassure me, "Paul, it is not all that bad, you don't have to have a girl operation, you are still a boy but you will dress and be a submissive girly-girl."

That didn’t make me feel any better.

"Mom, how can I go through life looking and acting like a girl when everyone will know I am a boy?"

My lawyer reminded me, “People will know you were sentenced for punishment and society accepts this as punishment. You have no choice anyhow. You will become a sissy and you will play out your new lifestyle.”

What did my lawyer call me? I made the mistake of trying to take a swingat her for that remark. She looked at my Mom auggesting, "I think he may need that treatment after all"!

I was screwed

I looked up with tears flowing wanting to know what she means. Mom smiled and said she has the information and will see how I do “switching over.”

What does all that mean? How could they "switch me over" to being a sissy?

Mom and I got home and my sister Kim wanted to know why I wasn’t in jail. After my Mom explained, Kim was smirking.

First time in years my sister hugged me and would not let go. What is up with this? The three of us sat down and Mom told me what I would do as my sister looked so pleased.

"Paul, the judge saved your life. She has sentenced you to a calmer life and one I hope you will be comfortable in. You surely won’t be getting in trouble anymore. It’s important you follow my every direction, accept your new position in life and learn to be a good girl. There is nothing wrong with being a girl and enjoying that life.Many boys your age have learning to love their new life and are much happier for it."

I couldn't take anymore thinking I would jump out the window and leave this mad house. Little did I know a bracelet the judge put on my leg would stop me every time I try to run. I ran.

I tried walking out the front door. Mom hit the button and I was down and out. I knew then I was in big trouble. She marched me upstairs and really yelled at me.

The next day Mom and Sis announced we were going shopping with the court approved sissy list. What the heck is a sissy list? But then I knew I would find out soon enough!

Off we went shopping. We started walking in Victoria Secret. I looked at them surprised, "Hold it, I can't go in there!" Mom smiled and said yes tou will and you will shop here often, this will be your new favorite store sweetie or do I have to press the button?

I knew how that button hurt, I followed Mom and Sis into this forbidden zone.

I was nervous! Mom looked at me, "Put a smile on your face , this won’t hurt, you might even like it"!

Mom got the manager and announced her son was under judge's orders for a “sissy transformation". The manager smiled and said, right this way; we have all her needs in the back.

They have all her needs in the back she said, what is going on here?

The store manager instructed me to, "Take your shirt off, you won’t need that ugly shirt again. She wrapped a tape measure around my chest and I complained in a loud voice, "What are you doing?"

“Calm down Paul, she is measuring you for your training bra, silly.”

Fear struck my face and I said, "What bra, I am NOT wearing a bra, that’s for girls!”

"Paul, stop right now, relax, you are becoming a sissy and sissies wear bras. You will and you will like it, do you hear me son?”

I couldn’t take this, I grabbed my shirt and grabbed the control devise in my Mom's hand that controlled my bracelet and ran out the dressing room door, through the store and I just keep running. Mom was yelling to get back here now! Little did I know she had a backup controller in her purse.

The next thing I knew I was waking up in what looked to be a doctors office in a bed all locked in, I couldn’t move. Now what is going on?

Just then Mom and a doctor walked in happy to see I was awake. The doctor announced it was time and he gave me two shots. I got really sleepy and through my fogginess I could see my Mom with a tear in her eye, “Don’t worry sweetie the doctor is here to help you, don't fight it.”

They put earphones on my head and a very soft feminine voice started talking to me. The voice message was so pleasant, so nice, she really relaxed me.

I heard Moms voice telling me to close my eyes and enjoy my lesson.

This lady on the headphones was telling me my new life as a sissy will be wonderful and I should accept my new fate.

She started playing with my head, telling me how pretty I will become and how submissive I will be. She had such a calming voice I was falling into her spell.

I couldn’t resist her thoughts. She told me I will always obey my Mother and sister, I will do exactly what they ask of me. I will try to be the best sissy possible, and will do everything to be a proud girly-girl, all the time. I shouldn’t be afraid to show myself in public and that I’ll be the sweetest prettiest sissy ever. I will enjoy my new life and be obedient and feminine!

Next thing I knew I was waking up in a bed in a very feminine room. Mom was sitting with me appearing happy asking me to wake up and gave me a kiss.

Like magic, I leaned over and gave her a big kiss and hug. "That’s so sweet Paul, you are going to be such a sweet sissy."

My mind was double thinking, knowing deep down I did not want to be a sissy, but for the most part I was happy she thought I was sweet. What’s wrong? I couldn’t t control my brain.

She stood up saying ok, lets get you dressed and go home. "Paul, get out of bed and take your nightgown off so I can dress you."

Like magic my body moved out of bed and I pulled off this silky long pink lacey nightgown. Looking at it made me confused and Mom knew it, "Isn't your new nightgown pretty dear, you can take it home, it's yours now."

I was so confused I smiled and said, good, it’s so pretty. "What did I say, it's so pretty?" What is going on?

Mom held out my new training bra and said she would help me since it my first time putting on a bra! Moms always look forward to helping their daughters with their first bra. There was my sister and now me!

Something is wrong, I didn’t resist. I even giggled and stuck out my arms to welcome my new underwear.

Mom hooked the clasp in the back, and fussed with the straps to get it just right. I looked down seeing the little padded cups sticking out giving me the appearance of small breasts.

Mom turned me around announcing how pretty I looked and asked how does my first bra fit?

The doctor must have really messed me up because I said, "my bra felt so soft and nice, I just loved how it fits Mom. Look how pretty this bow is here Mom, between my cups. Can I wear this bra home?"

Mom hugged me and said, "Paul I am so glad you like your first bra. Of course you can wear your pretty bra home, you will be wearing a bra now the rest of your life. I am so happy for us, you are going to make such a pretty sissy, sweetie."

We got home and Kim, my 19 year old sister, was confused seeing me in my boy clothes. Mom explained they had a problem, but the doctor now fixed it and her brother is all set for his new life.

Kim hugged me with a delightful smile, giggling, mentioning she is so excited to have a sister as she snapped my bra strap!

“That is for all the times you snapped my bra straps Paul!”

“We are going to have so much fun. Lets go upstairs and get you out of these ugly boy clothes and into a pretty dress”

Mom thought that to be a great idea. I was surprised as I put up no tesistance and followed them upstairs. My brain is really messed up I thought.

I undressed, Kim marveled at my cute padded training bra. She seemed so excited pulling out matching panties and a garter belt.

Mom got out a dress, held it up saying, "Girls, this is going to be so much fun."

It was strange, I knew this was wrong, but I couldn’t stop what my sister and Mom were dressing me in.

Mom said we would go to her beauty shop tomorrow and put the finishing touches on my pretty look. That idea touched a nerve and got me thinking. Mom knew I was not happy and ran over to my ear and whispered,

“You’re so pretty."

All of a sudden my whole demeanor switched, I got so relaxed, so calm.

My sister slipped over my head a very lacey soft full slip voicing how pretty this would be on me. Strange, I didn’t resist, allowing her to dress me in these ultra feminine clothes. Wow, they have total control over me now, I thought. What did that hospital do to me?

The next day I did get a wig and a trip to the beauty salon. I had my nails done, everything. I really like the pampering and all the girls there seemed to love helping me get beautiful.

The days and weeks went on. Mom gave me special pills twice a day and I was doing lots of housework. She and my sister controlled everything I did and all my training.

Soon, I dressing myself each day and did my makeup without their help. I was proud of my figure as Mom had me wear very shapely feminine clothes. For some reason I was enjoying my new life.

I was scheduled for a follow up court appearance to see the judge, to prove I was being a good sissy.

Mom bought me a new dress and beautiful sparkly red high heels for the occasion. I took all morning getting ready. I couldn’t understand all the fuss. We even stopped at the beauty salon for makeup and "sprucing up" as Mom calls it before seeing the judge.

I really looked good, looking in the mirror reveled a very cute teenage girl. Even stranger, I was happy with this. I think I was forgetting my past as a boy and accepting my new sissy status.

All three of us walked into the judge's courtroom. My heels were clicking away, announcing my feminine walk and total sounds of a girl enjoying her walk.

The judge was very happy to see me again.

I knew this was not right, I was here before as a boy but now look at me. For some reason, I couldn’t resist my new life.

The judge congratulated my Mom and me. Asking if I need the medical treatment after all.

"Yes, and it's made his demeanor all the difference in the world. Thank you judge." Mom replied.

I thought, thats what they did in the hospital; they gave me a medical treatment to accept my new sissy life!! I knew I was finished, how could I fight this?

The judge asked my mother if was ready for phase two? Oh, no what is that?

Mom giggled answering “yes, my son would love phase two, right son?” All I could do was to agree.

“Ok then. I will sign the paperwork and you can start the hormone treatment next week with your doctor's help.”

The judge asked what name I wanted on my new birth certificate and records. Mom smiled and shouted ‘Pauline’.

What? I don't want that name, but I couldn’t say it, my mouth would not open. All I could do is smile and nod yes. I was getting a girls name on all my records. I was going to become a girl.

Mom grabbed my hand, "Come on Pauline, lets go celebrate your new name and life as my daughter!"

Help! Someone please rescue me!!!

[cornertheculprit]

see like what's so so so fucked about bridge to the turnabout is that the final witness on the stand is maya. the final witness on the stand is maya and she is lying through her teeth and she knows it and phoenix knows it and she knows he knows and he knows she knows he knows. this is maya who is so self-sacrificing. who once wrote to phoenix that he should get engarde a guilty verdict even if it meant her life. who once pushed past phoenix and told him to run while she threw herself at von karma for him. for their case. this is maya who mia told to take care of phoenix for her. this is maya who believes in phoenix more than absolutely anyone.

and this is phoenix who has promised maya he would never abandon her. this is phoenix who has told maya to her face that he would never desert her. this is phoenix who once came so so close to pinning corrida's death on adrian andrews just so she would be alive and safe. this is phoenix who admitted that maya was the closest person to him. this is phoenix who mia asked to watch over maya and who responded "of course" with no hesitation. this is phoenix who ran across a burning bridge to try and reach her on the off-chance that she might be in danger.

this is phoenix and maya, the friendship that we've seen develop over the course of three games. and maya is lying on the stand and begging phoenix to please just stop. to please just listen to her. because she knows he knows and phoenix looks at her and goes "...may i?" because he is going to drag the truth into the light like he always does. he knows this. she knows this. in any other situation she would not let him get away with settling for anything less than the truth and so even at the cost of hurting her he will drag the truth out of her. and she believes in him more than anyone and that makes it all worse because she knows he'll do it. that's why she believes in him in the first place. and the thing is? the real kicker of it all? they're doing it for the same reason:

Maya: ...... I knew it... You've figured it out, haven't you, Nick...?

Phoenix: (Maya... I guess you were doing your best to cover for Godot... ...for the same reason, huh?)

even when they were at odds they were still thinking alike. and then it's phoenix begging maya to tell the truth, and this time he says "don't bother trying to hide anything, because i'll know." he knows her like the back of his hand just like she knows him. the same way she knew that he would figure out where she was being held when she was kidnapped: "i thought you'd come. i knew you would." phoenix is urging her in this trial the same way maya urged him by leaving him that note in farewell, my turnabout: speak the truth, even if it hurts you. even if it hurts me. even if it hurts all of us. i believe in your ability to speak the truth. it's "now listen up! you'd better get engarde a guilty sentence, ok!? if you get that creepy slimebag a not guilty, i'll never forgive you, ever!" and it's "...please, maya. testify. [...] i want to hear the truth from your own lips..." it's looking at a person you love, your best friend, the "person closest" to you, your self-proclaimed "big sister", somebody that you'll believe in until the sky falls down, and saying that the truth matters more than anything else. what a FUCKING case man

[pheavampire]

I have a very specific reason why I’m so hyped for Astarion. I just really, really hope they didn’t change his backstory though.

If you don't know anything about his mortal life and want to stay spoiler free, don't read it further. The stuff I'm writing about was being said by Larian 2 years ago and it may or may not be up to date.

.

.

.

He had everything. Power, money, look. An aristocrat, a magistrate and probably a hedonist, Astarion was used to not caring about „lesser” forms of life, he probably didn’t even think about them. The fate of many people was in his hands and was playing with it. His unjust verdicts ruined lives, but he was making money because of it. If Sven’s word are up-to-date, he was even traded prisoners to Cazador, just to be even more rich.

And then everything, everything turned upside down in a blink of an eye.

During one night Astarion tasted all of his karma. He lost absolutely everything - except for his look. He became the very thing he was playing with before - a slave. It’s a tragedy to be poor and loosing freedom, but when you are an aristocrat, almost a polititian, a man used to giving orders, it’s even more awful and humiliating. His power is gone, his money is gone, all he has now is a dark, musty crypt, tortures and rats. Just imagine his shock during the first nights, weeks, months even. And let’s remember he is an elf - which means that the lack of sun should be even more devastating for him. And then this hell lasts for 200 years: he can observe how the world slowly forgets about him, how his name is being lost, how he becomes a metaphorical - and even kind of literal - ghost in his own homeland. Did he have any family? They may be still alive, elves can live for about 600 years. Did they look for him? Did they love him or despise him? How would they react if they discovered he turned into an undead abomination dependent on a vampire lord?

I love stories like this.

Of course I won’t see his past, and if I do, there will be just a glimpse of it. Larian could have also changed Astarion’s backstory. But even if they did, I will be still quite OK with it, although a bit disappointed.

But not gonna lie - I am fascinated in stories about this kind of downfall and want to know as much as possible.

[thefiresofpompeii]

finished heartbreak high s2. verdict: meh. some of the storylines were satisfying and complex (cash chook darren harper) some were funny and heartbreaking at once (missy and spider’s thing; the school captain race, cumlords etc) but the main love triangle is… i don’t care about these people sorry. rowan needs therapy amerie is annoying malakai is… gone? ok. revolutionary for making the love triangle an actual triangle (everyone is bisexual and into each other’s exes) but apart from that…….

yeah i’m watching this show for quinni and quinni alone. seeing her gain independence and refuse to make herself smaller and more palatable to accommodate the bullshit expectations of her neurotypical friends? waltzing in to that housewarming party in dark eyeshadow and dancing on the table, being honest and speaking her mind, staying out of the drama and investigating for the thrill of it? watching the world around her change and grow and realising she can, too? coming up with a powerful speech on the spot and accidentally getting elected for captain? i love her so much. she is my profile picture because she is literally me. the only character in any piece of fictional media i have ever seen that is exactly like me. makes me cry if i think about her too hard. gosh

i wish angeline of the underworld was a real book series i’d probably be a massive fan

[kirans-wonderland]

Headcanons for (if you’re ok with it.) Twst staff if the reader showed them the movie Damsel (2024) on Netflix. It’s a good movie.

The trailer makes it look woke but the main girl is NOT the girl power,strong,bitchy woman,who can beat the enemy from the start kind of main character that we see in so many movies now a days.

She’s not, it’s a survival movie and she LEARNS how to survive in the place she is literally thrown.

I hope I this is what you were thinking! The movie was great. Thank you for the request <3

cw: Damsel spoilers

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Trein:

not a big movie watcher so it took some convincing

he’s the type to mumble comments throughout a movie

“There’s no surviving that fall. She would be dead” … Hush and watch the movie

He holds Lucius a little closer during the scene with the burning birds

He understood the dragon’s pain because of his own daughters

“How could that small bit of blood fool the dragon like that? It is preposterous”

“She should have died four times by now” … Suspension of disbelief Mozus jeez

He somehow almost fell asleep during the action

“The girl knows her worth… good” He commented as she didn’t spare the prince.

His final verdict: “it was not brain dead. I did enjoy it. Thank you”

Crewel:

He prefers to watch media alone, but he agreed none the less

He is silent while watching it

he does visibly tense whenever her dress is ripped

Though he is quiet, he’s making a long list in his head

As soon as the credits begin to roll, all his thoughts come pouring out

“Such a beautiful dress, RUINED!!”

He loves the costumes

He dives deep into how Elodie’s character development was shown in her color palettes

Later you would definitely find him designing clothes off screencaptures of Elodie’s wedding dress

Prepare to hear grumbling comments about the ruined dress for the next couple days

His final verdict: He loved the costumes… that’s all you can get him to talk about

Crowley:

So he can get movies from your world but not send you home?

He cries a lot for some reason

You can’t tell if it’s genuine or he’s trying to appease you by acting interested in the movie

The only time you are sure his crying is real is when the dragon babies were killed. (He’s not beating the Malleus’ father allegations)

He pulled his “oh how gracious!” card when she spares the dragon

Mans full on laughs when the kingdom gets torched

His final verdict: All he does is smile.. no words.. just smile

Sam:

Of course! He’s excited

He’s a pretty quiet movie watcher

The most he talks is about the glowworms

He finds them fascinating and imagines how many ways that they could be used

The blood ritual also peaks his interest

He appreciates how resourceful and creative Elodie is

His final verdict: He liked it. “I’d watch it with you again if you’d like~”

Vargas:

Again, not a big movie watcher but eventually you get him to sit still

I don’t know what’s going on in his brain, but he’s rooting for the dragon

He’s cheering like it’s a sports game

“WOOO! YEAHH! GET HER!! YEAH! WOO!”

It’s a big dichotomy at how pumped and loud he is during the chase scenes in comparison to how silent he is during.. anything else

His final verdict: “The dragon should have won” but.. she kinda did- “the dragon should have won.”

[trainingdummyrabbit]

okaaaaaay. ranking the library's floors based on how nice it would be to take a nap there. graded by ambiance and comfort. trying not to let too many of my own biases shine through but also no promises. im sleepy. ok 👍

> Lobby/Halls: im counting it because itd be funny. the ambiance is not unlike a hotel hallway; kind of really unsettling in its uniformity and undefinedness, but it Does make you sleepy if youre brave enough to risk it. feels like there'd be a chaser monster in there. and there is, if you count angela, i guess. 5/10 ambience. im pretty sure it is like 60-70% stairs if you look at it, which is deeply funny. where do the stairs go. i guess the better question is where Don't the stairs go. there are also no chairs or Anything; just bookshelves and lamps. its pretty clear you arent supposed to be in there long. dim lighting's pretty nice at least. 3/10 comfort. VERDICT: 4/10. At least it's got presentation.

> Floor of General Works: the vibe is pretty nice, if you can get past feeling like a tree on a prairie. a hawk could swoop in and snatch you or something. the towers of books could be kinda comforting for the right people, though. 4/10 ambiance. this is books. 3/10 comfort. VERDICT: 3.5/10. Don't Fall Off.

> Floor of History: its pretty busy, but the kind of busy where it just kinda turns into comforting background noise. its like the equivalent of having on cafe noises to study or sleep to. less of a "lulling you to sleep" sort of deal and more of a "i am so tired i could literally pass out sitting up." and then you do. might be a little much, but if you can find a nice corner somewhere it might be refreshing. nice little power nap. 7/10 ambiance. not Really the most conducive to taking a nap physically-- best you've got is facedown on the desk. which, honestly, isnt too bad. theyre nice desks. could make yourself a little hidey hole with the books sitting around. just be careful not to let anyone spot you. 7/10 comfort. VERDICT: 7/10. Respectably cozy for a quick pick-me-up.

> Floor of Technological Sciences: the light from the windows is probably jarring as hell, but away from that is pretty nice honestly. a bit uniform for my own liking, but the dim light looks like it'd do wonders. cant imagine how anyone doesn't already get sleepy working in there. 7/10 ambiance. the geaaaarrrsssss.... good luck getting any actual sleep with That nonsense going on 24/7. also i dont think theres a Single non-90 degree angle in the entire floor besides the gears, (which you Really shouldnt be sleeping near,) which i cant imagine does anyone's backs any favors. not a single good desk in sight beyond yesods, and i dont think hed take kindly to sharing this way. also that is the most uncomfortable looking couch i have ever seen. 2/10 comfort. VERDICT: 4.5/10. Almost, buddy. Bring your own pillow. And earplugs.

> Floor of Literature: the little ceiling lights are absolutely Lovely. could argue for it being too bright, but honestly that's an easy fix. its comfy in the way a school library is-- honestly one of the more inviting floors to be on. its practically Begging for a nap tbh. very neat and comfortable. 8/10 ambiance. girl how small is that table???? even with leniency for art style with the size, the chair backs barely reach th edge of the table. looks like youd be ppppretty squished sleeping there. doesn't look like theres many other notable spots to sneak your way into either, so its the table or the floor. one way or another you are waking up as if youve been hit by a truck. 3/10 comfort. VERDICT: 5.5/10. Very polite and comfy, but oh Man is that gonna mess you up later.

> Floor of Art: YEAH BABEY!!!!! very dim but with several soft light sources, the loose and comfortable feel of the place-- this is what its all about honestly. the paintings and such are a nice touch as well. chances are, no ones gonna really bat an eye if they catch you asleep here. it just feels like the place for it. the natural look must be very nice after everything, too. 9/10 ambiance. those floorboards are Going to kill you. cant imagine trying to walk in there without tripping. not a lot of obvious places to set up, but if youre feeling brave you can probably nest up in a pile of books somewhere. on the other hand, theres probably all sorts of little spaces and nooks to tuck into if youre crafty. as someone who would enjoy sleeping in a cabinet, can approve. 6/10 comfort. VERDICT: 7.5/10. He gets a 10/10 in MY heart. Taking that back pain like a CHAMP.

> Floor of Natural Sciences: the same kind of comfort as an old ladys guest room. aka i Wish i could take a nap there. only caveat is the blinding light coming in from pretty much everywhere. its like trying to sleep with an open curtain, but like... all the time. looks like itd smell nice in there, at least. 7/10 ambiance. has actually comfy-looking chairs! seems like thered be a few places you could manage to tuck into comfortably in a corner someplace with a cushion or something. also one of (maybe the only?) floors that actually has carpeting! so no getting woken up by footsteps, or having to sleep on floorboards. 7/10 comfort. VERDICT: 7/10. Probably like sleeping in a sunbeam. Equally disorienting when Tiph inevitably gets at you for slacking off.

> Floor of Language: its kinda scruffy looking, but if youre not bothered by that it looks like it might be pretty comforting actually. i wont explain. lightings pretty nice as long as youre not looking directly out the window. soundscape might not be horrible, its a bit of a coinflip with the industrial look though. caveat? cigarette smoke... 7/10 ambiance. Comfy! Looking! COUCH!!! you Are passing out on that thing whether you want to or not. also you could probably have a nice time tucking up against the windowsill if you can handle the brightness. might even be warm. im kinda surprised actually. 8/10 comfort. VERDICT: 7.5/10. I could swear I've fallen asleep here before. Minus the um. Lava. But you get what I mean.

> Floor of Social Sciences: this place looks like a memory. this is the type of sleep youd get where youre briefly kinda disoriented on where you are for a while. ive gotta imagine the water sounds pretty nice too. and the coffee smells! can you imagine?? theres probably all sorts of small talk going on in the background, just a few people stopping by here and there to exchange pleasantries over a drink. i gotta stop here, i Will just keep going. 10/10 ambiance. i need to bump this up at least a little due to the theme alone. im listening while writing these and the sheer wave of peace it always brings is indescribable. howeverrrrr... return of The Couch. you Cannot convince me that thing is made of any sort of remotely soft material. at least its got pillows. on the other hand, you get good windowsill access (REALLY good windowsill too,) AND bar access. must be nice to find a quiet corner in, too. 8/10 comfort. VERDICT: 9/10. Is anyone honestly surprised. (But still, jeez dude.)

> Floor of Philosophy: the dim lighting AND the ceiling stars??? dude... its a bit quiet, but quiet in the way a classroom is after-hours. a silent sort of welcoming. if youre able, Nothing is going to bother you in there. this is where you go to Rest. 9/10 ambiance. girl there is NOWHERE to sleep. other than like the table. also is that just... water? on the floor? i appreciate the aesthetic deeply, but um. i dont think thats very nap conducive. the floor is probably wood but it looks almost like stone with how its shaped. cant imagine your back would thank you after that one. table's not too bad at least. 6/10 comfort. VERDICT: 7.5/10. The equivalent of passing out in a therapist's office. Hope you're ready for an in-depth personal conversation when you wake up.

> Floor of Religion: this looks like a principals office. cant shake the feeling of mild yet stern disapproval coming from this place. on the other hand, it Does feel Very secure. id imagine thered be at least faint clock ticking-- That has to be pretty nice. if youre the right person, i guess. the occasional ceiling light is pretty nice, but its already pretty bright in there. youll fall asleep in here and either feel like no time has passed at all after several hours or feel like its been an eternity after 5 minutes. no in-between. 5/10 ambiance. there is Nowhere to Sleep. maybe the stairs if youre cool with having to sleep against the railing, but also that Is a tripping hazard, and nobody likes a tripping hazard. has a similar problem to yesods floor, in that everything is Very straight-laced and proper, meaning there is like... nowhere comfortable to sit. other than like one desk and a table or two maybe. 3/10 comfort. VERDICT: 4/10. I'd say you rank better in my heart, but this is honestly about as expected. in conclusion: chesed's floor once again remaining the people's favorite. if you need me ill be tucked into a cubby at netzie's. come get me in like 3 hours or so, i will almost Certainly get stuck up there. ok 👍

[a-story-teller]

Seriously one of the most confounding things in the world is pop-Christian moralizing.

"Is ASMR ok for Christians?? 🤨🤔😧" I'm not sure in what world it would be sinful to listen to soothing brushing, ocean sounds, and tapping, yet someone felt the need to ask the question, and someone else felt the need to make a YouTube video answering it. (I didn't watch it, so I don't know the verdict, but somehow you're trusting the verdict to a rando on YouTube and not Discernment from God?)

"Christian facials" because having a hot towel on your face and putting on serum is in any way aligned with a religion or lack thereof, and therefore needs to/even Can be made Christian?

"Christian-friendly sex positions" and the only difference is it's stick figures instead of realistic drawings, and instead of male/female or penetrator/receiver, it's husband/wife. Because you know those goofy health-book illustrations were distracting you from the righteous goal at hand: eating your girl out. But you can't call her your girl, you have to make it clear to everyone seeing you have sex (which... is just the 2 of you, right?) that you're having Good and Not Sinful sex, because you, a Husband, are Married to your Wife. Side note: the stick figures actively make it harder to figure out the intricacies of any of the positions and therefore are objectively shittier at doing what they're made to do.

Christian soap, christian mints, christian calendars, christian music, christian curtains, christian fiction, christian restaurants, christian news, christian shops. There are things in the world that are OK being secular. The fact that your soap does not have an icthus sign etched in that washes away in 3 days anyway does not make you a bad person, or even a bad christian. Your home does not need something Christian™️ in every room for people (or yourself!) not to forget you're christian... I assume?

The king who must say he is king, etcetera. This kind of mindset is so boggling to me, and reeks of nominative faith and deeeeep insecurity. Retail therapy but instead of buying temporary happiness you're buying temporary grace. Being so beholden to the dogma of organized religion that you go to any person feigning authority on the subject rather than using your own brain to make a decision. The idea that things can only be okay to interact with if they're explicitly christian, as though interacting with it as a christian doesn't inherently put it through a christian lens; as though you can only get things trickled down to you from church authority figures with robust enough constitutions to judge what's ok for you because you don't have the ability to think critically; as though you should stay away from what's "sinful" rather than, LIKE JESUS, be able to go into it and be a good example; as though instead of learning to be capable of handling it, you should be as weak to sin as possible; as though you have to go through the world with kid gloves because touching something dirty would soil your soul (which, of course this implies, is sparkling - impossible, arrogant, and kind of denying God, lol [actually, not lol, I'm expanding on that. Denying God by refusing to admit your own sin. Denying God by refusing his grace because you won't admit your own sin. Denying God by acting like his power couldn't absolve something as simple as being exposed to sin, let alone if you did end up making a miatake. Denying God by keeping yourself in Good Christian spaces and not being there for people who need outside help. There's more but I digress]).

Also, the childish áffect of refusing to say things as they are because that would be bad, but referring to it in euphamism is fine - or, transversely, that using colloquialisms is bad, but medical speak is fine, depending on what breed of crackpot christian you're dealing with. "Hanky-panky" just say sex. "Adult drinks" just say wine, beer, liquor. "Flower" for the love of all that is holy just say vulva/vagina/virginity. "Breasts" is fine to describe your chest but "boobs" is not. You can say "buttocks" but not "butt". Discussing bathroom activities is decisively not cool but if utterly necessary you must say "urine" and "feces" because pee and poop are too pedestrian.

Like, entire side tangent, but the weirdly widespread christian-ism of not discussing things frankly or discussing them super detachedly, but both preferring to never discuss them at all, regarding anything "potentially sinful" or "not spiritually uplifting" (usually boiling down to "anything physical") is so whack to me. Do not discuss your period, even in female spaces, because it's tmi. Don't talk about your health issues if they're not Clean enough subjects, even as something to pray about (like breast/prostate cancer, shitting diseases). Don't ever talk about your sex life except to wiggle your eyebrows at your kids when they're old enough. Don't hug your male friends, daughter. Don't play with your little cousins, son. Sex is so so bad but everything is about it, actually. Sex is so so great which is why you should feel guilty about ever wanting it. All nudity is sexual. Dress so they know you're a woman but also that you're a lady. Fart jokes are not allowed. You must remember that all men are looking at you with lust at all times but you can't hold that against them. All things that get you sweaty or muddy are bad. Hair on women is unnatural but just dandy for men, except we can't talk about pubic hair so you're just going to have to figure out on your own if it's less sinful to not think about your vag enough to do anything to it or to ensure you're free of all sinful hair. Here's how to do makeup in a god-honoring way, because you couldn't know on your own, and you must both jump through this hoop to be acceptable to your men but not have enough fun and personal expression with it for it to become anything other than a chore. It is wrong to kill, which is why we support the troops. We are supposed to help the poor, which is why I drive past the beggars that are dirty and ragged and smelly. We are supposed to celebrate God with our bodies, which is why my most spiritually moved state equates to slightly raising my arms.

I can't close this post without including my oft-quoted favorite example of this weird-ass pop-Christian phenomenon translating to real-life people in real-time thoughts: my mom saying she had to take into account "which ice cream flavor is most glorifying to God" at a froyo shop. Either it's raspberry, or she chose sin that day.

[a-hundred-jewels]

ok im reading the solangelo book and HOLY MOTHER OF DEMONS what the actual FUCK!!!??!?!???!?!? only around the 100 page mark so i cant firmly give a verdict but thusfar i am absolutely LOVING it!!! the darker tone (& its a VERY dark tone oh my god) suits the setting and the characters really fucking well - never read anything by mark oshiro before but they are an absolutely incredible writer and the blend of uncle rick's nostalgic young percy writing style with the more adult borderline horror vibes AND the fucking queer beauty of it all (thank you thank you thank you mark stg i want to read ALL of your stuff immediately) makes a story about some of my favourite characters of all time all the more captivating and genuinely terrifying to read. this could have been a cheap cash grab, a rainbow capitalism and i would have read it anyway but GOOD GODS this is EXACTLY for me. rick, youve made mistakes and some of them have been pretty harmful, but between this and the pjo show and daughter of the deep (which i also loved - truly one of my favourite books i read in 2022) im genuinely impressed at the effort going into making this fandom (& kids media in general) a more inclusive space (ie hiring sensitivity readers for daughter of the deep, cowriting tsats with a nonbinary writer). truly cant wait to see what happens next, both in the future of rick riordan and mark oshiro, and in this FUCKING BOOK whoch is EATING MY BRAIN.

[toomuchracket]

love when we are thinking about d word. my favourite thought right now is getting coffee or lunch delivered to the office when she’s working and he’s out of town. just as a version of looking after her because she can let stuff like that slide if she’s really busy. and flowers i feel like reception would be sick of the delivery people there (just kidding everyone loves girly in my mind and they think it’s sweet)

when you and matty are getting to know each other and he's in the office, i think you definitely do coffee/lunch hangouts together every day - one day, probably mid end of financial year stuff, i think he comes over like "hey do you want to go for lunch" and you don't even look away from your computer like "i'm so sorry but i'm too busy to take a break rn. but i'll come and find you later for a tea if that's cool", and matty's like "yeah no worries darlin', i'll see you in a bit". the hours pass, and you don't leave your desk; only when everyone else is packing up their stuff to go home do you run over to matty like "god i am SO sorry i lost track of time trying to get everything done i hope i haven't upset you", and he's like "it's alright sweetheart! i didn't want to interrupt you. but i can give you a lift home and we'll get some dinner on the way, yeah? surely you're starving, you missed lunch". and you're like "ok yeah i'm a bit hungry", so you end up getting pizza and eating it in matty's car and chatting lol. the next day, at lunch, he's like "i know you're busy but i thought you should probably eat something so i got you some soup" - you look up at him, all starry-eyed and genuinely touched, like "thank you for taking care of me", and matty's like "s'ok. i like making sure you're alright". and it becomes a thing when you're really busy and matty's around, him dropping off lunch for you and refusing to let you pay him back for it (he's like "the reason you're so busy is because you're sorting our shit out, sweetheart, it's the least i could do to thank you". but you give him little gifts to even the score, regardless). it continues when you actually start seriously dating, although it often becomes matty sliding a tupperware of leftovers from the dinner he made you last night over to you before you leave for work, and he sets up a deal thing with the cafe near the office you both like and frequent so that you get lunch delivered during any really busy periods when he's not in london and able to drop you something off. and i also think matty would be like "i don't ever mean to patronise or baby you, darlin', i just wanna make sure you're healthy", because he's conscious of the potential power dynamics and imbalances but also he really does just want the best for you, bless him. and the flowers! i wrote about him getting you a bloom & wild subscription for at home while he's away, but i think he'll send a little bunch to the office every so often for your desk, too. you and the girls at reception have a laugh about it - you go in on monday mornings and they're like "another bouquet for you, babe", and you roll your eyes and do that "you're joking. not ANOTHER one?" bit from the bbc news before you're like "what's the verdict on them", and the girls will give their opinions lmao. you apologise for the constant extra deliveries addressed to you, and they're like "nah it's cute. and flowers are more fun to get than office supplies lol". you tell matty about this whole bit, and whenever he's home and he personally comes in with flowers for you, he has to stop at reception to show the girls before he takes them up to you lol - to be honest, i think he's less known to them as "matty" and more as "your boyfriend", despite the fact he's worked at/with dh longer than you lmao. v sweet <3