#only thing stopping me is my anxiety FUCK

[dayangaytransman]

Warnings: Queerphobia, harassment

Three people just attacked me! This happened around 30 minutes ago or maybe 1 hour ago I don't know. For the record, I live in Iran. I have long dyed red hair and my face is feminine. I look very androgynous and people here don’t like it. Additionally, I have social anxiety, so just going outside is scary, and this thing makes it worse. I was going shopping for my mother. It was a long road and I was walking. Then three boys on a motorcycle saw me. They were very young, around 15 to 18 years old, but they were much bigger than me. At first, they just stopped the motorcycle in front of me. I was listening to music with my headphones and didn’t listen to them. I walked away. But they stopped me for the second time and this time, they spat on the ground in front of me. I walked away again, but the last time, one of them kicked my leg. It didn’t hurt at all, but I noticed they wouldn’t let me go. So, I kicked the last boy’s butt with all my might. It was a rainy day, so my shoes were dirty. The first boy was the one who kicked me, but I was closer to the last one. Then I jumped into the nearby shop. I told the man who works there that these guys were harassing me and asked if I could stay in his shop. He said yes. And he was a very handsome man. Anyway, I got a panic attack in my binder. I stayed in his shop for 15 minutes and then left. I can’t stay in this country because people hate me only because of my hair and the way I look! And I know if I call the police, they will do nothing. I’ve seen what happens when you call the police. The police will also harass you. My friends have had similar experiences. I have voice dysphoria, and during this ordeal, I was so scared of what would happen if they found out I am an AFAB person.

The people are worse than the government. Fuck it. I don’t want to cut my hair short, but I also don’t want to feel unsafe.

[k-nkypills]

I don’t think my partners understand how in the palm of their hand I am. All they have to do is say my name a certain way, call me pup/puppy, praise me or flirt with me and my cock is twitching and I’m clenching around nothing. Irl it would be worse. I’d let them do whatever they wanted to me as long as they called me good boy and held me, wanna slide inside to breed me? Hold my chin in your hand as you pull my pants down. Want head? Press your fingers against my lips and let me suck on them while calling me good boy or mutt before you take your underwear off. Need something to rut against? Call me over and pat where you want me, tell me to pull my skirt and boxers off so you can rub against my tdick. Need to take your frustrations out? Call me good mutt while you breed my pussy or facefuck me. Get jealous? Call me your pretty boy while you fuck me for as long as you want. I’d get on my hands and knees for these two in an instant no hesitation. I am foaming at the mouth I need them to breed me PLEASEEEE-

[silenthillbunni]

🐰🌧️

[danielnelsen]

mmmmm thunder bad

[arionawrites]

1. it’s my 24th birthday today, so my goal of being published by the time i’m 25 is now a one year looming monster, but i never specified what kind of published and am currently looking in various literary magazines that are recommended for writers who have yet to be published, so i’m surprisingly confident that i can make it work? and tbh even if whatever i write isn’t officially published before my 25th birthday, if i have someone in the process of being published then i’ll be happy!! no matter what though, i’m gonna try to be proud of myself for at least giving it my best shot!!

2. i honestly love that my birthday is on the ides of march because the ides of march meme shitposting is only a thing on tumblr but it also being my birthday makes it easier to like. be excited about the ides of march outside of tumblr. like even in person i can be like “it’s my birthday! i’m an ides of march babe (:” and if someone is like oh what’s that? or if they say something along the lines of oh like julius caesar? i can be like yep!! and even if it’s a small thing outside of tumblr it brings me immense enjoyment and amusement being able to bring it up off of tumblr

3. transportation situation has been very rough since june 2023 when i totalled my car, my gap insurance are being assholes and i ended up putting my foot down on the phone with them yesterday which i’m pretty proud of because i am NOT a confrontational person (something i’ve been working on this past year, so seeing some improvement with my ability to hold my ground and not be a pushover yesterday was very cool!!) i was told i’d get a response from them by friday next week no matter what, and if i don’t then friday of next week i will continue to wreak havoc upon them. but my moms car which i’ve been using since my accident broke down yesterday, hopefully it’s fixable but my parents were saying it might be done for, so trying to think of how i’m gonna get to work next week is kind of stressing me out lmao, but for now i’m just gonna focus on enjoying my birthday the best i can because i don’t want to start off being 24 with an overwhelming anxiety for something that won’t be a potential issue until monday. plus i already messaged my boss today to let her know that i’m going to do everything i can to make it work out but just so she’s in the loop and knows of the potential of me not being able to make my morning shifts (one of my coworkers said she’s more than happy to give me a ride for our afternoon shifts which does help relieve some of the stress!) and i told her i’d let her know for sure sunday so that if necessary she can have time to figure out someone to fill in for me in the mornings!

overall: life is weird and i ended being 23 yesterday with a shitty situation but a positive outlook and i am going to enjoy my first day of being 24 no matter what because honestly i fucking earned it. happy friday everyone, i hope it’s a good day for you and me both!

[twistedappletree]

.

[steakout-05]

eeuuaghh i would like everyone to know that i apologise if i have not responded to your reblogs/mentions/posts on tumblr, i have really terrible social anxiety and for some reason people talking to me makes my nervous system think i'm being hunted for sport by a resident evil boss. sorry if i havent responded i'm not being rude i'm just having a panic attack :P

additionally: social anxiety is actually the reason why a lot of my old posts from late 2022 had weird spacing and spelling mistakes. i was too anxious to type properly

[void-tiger]

Disability, cptsd, and adhd really has turned me into…egh. A planner. Not because I want to be. But because I either need to figure things out well ahead or I forget or avoid them, or because I can’t set them down mentally.

[skhardwarevers1]

sorry for saying I was going to do things and even starting them and then disappearing from this website entirely for three days. It will happen again

[theclosetedskeleton]

WHIMSY POSTING PAUSED the day I finally stop my compulsive skin picking habits is the day its OVER for all of my enemies

[neo-shitty]

[silenthillbunni]

🐰🩹🧸🏨

[newtness532]

im going to attempt to ignore everything my anxiety filled brain is telling me

[silverislander]

i might have to ask my chaucer prof for an extension on this assignment and fucking god i really don't want to. i REALLY don't want to

i've already had to email him to get the details on literally every single assignment and quiz we've done for two different classes bc he keeps forgetting to give them to us on time, so he definitely knows me by now and i am TERRIFIED it's getting annoying even tho i know it was fully justified. i also recently had to ask him to move my presentation date back for this class (bc he didn't fucking give us the topics for weeks on end so i couldn't have started it early even if i hadn't been too busy to try) which he did do

but i am Going Through It rn w my brain. it's getting really bad again. whenever i open the doc w my essay i just have this wave of anxiety and i can't start writing it. there's only five days left until the deadline, it is five pages and i've written two sentences of the intro + have no sources, i do not have time to procrastinate on this i barely have time to finish it as it stands rn

[liebelesbe]

hmmmmmmm

[oscill4te]

tfw your psychiatry-critical bc pyschs push meds onto traumatized people with no consideration for the side effects or offering no actual long-term treatment for their patients that targets the root of their issues- basically meds be like a bandaid solution that can make you worse, but then again you also finally got back on your med after over a week and there is no denying that it helps you 1000%... lol...