#personal ramblings

[morgaine-la-reveuse]

I don't know who needs to hear this, but:

It is absolutely fine to use a label, only to realise it doesn't suit you anymore. Labels aren't there to bind you to them. They serve as a way to better describe how one feels and what ones lived experience can be like.

I had two pipelines of relabeling myself simultaneously.

From bi to lesbian, and back to bi.

From asexual to demisexual (because I thought, that one day, maybe I feel this kind of attraction, as sex-ambivalent and oscillating were terms I related with, and still do), and back to being asexual.

Does that make me less sapphic or a-spec? Absolutely not.

And to be honest: I still haven't figured out if I'm demiromantic or aromantic. And that is perfectly fine. We don't own anyone an explanation, but ourselves.

If the label felt good at that time, but doesn't anymore, let it go and take the one that feels more fitting. ♡ We are human beings. We are allowed to grow. You are valid, no matter which label you choose.

[newtness532]

ive been seeing tea packets say "plant based teabags" and i was so weirded out by the idea of animal based tea bags that i didn't even consider that the alternative would actually be something more normal like plastic

[yokoyas]

there’s a through line in fob lyrics that i might have just made up into a half formed thought about feeling fundamentally put together wrong, being hard to understand and hard to love unless you make yourself more palatable am i making sense

[thegainingdesk]

I work with my best mate who has obviously picked up somewhat on me packing on about 3 stone in 18 months, and that I'm not exactly upset about the added weight. Our relationship involves lots of teasing and jokes at the other's expense, so obviously the new and improved, fatter Desk has come in for some flack.

I took over a maternity role for someone, and he patted my gut at the pub after I was offered the position and asked if I was the one who was pregnant; someone (quite unexpectedly) revealed that they've got a six-pack, and he quipped that I'd been growing "a single great big ab"; we had a work thing about healthy living and he made sure to explain the concept of "eating less" to me; there's lots of comments about the amount I've eaten, or comparisons to other big guys we work with, or "bulking", and lots of belly pats and pokes.

He mentioned last week that he's bulking (but, you know, normal bulking at the gym, not eating his way into obesity), that he's currently 11 stone, and would like to work his way up to 12 stone as an initial goal. Well, naturally, I worked in that I'm currently a little over 18 stone. He was genuinely shocked. Who can blame him? It's a big number! He sort of looked at me for a bit as if he'd not properly noticed just how big I'd gotten, and then just sort of said "fuck, I guess you are about that yeah." Then he remembered that I'd previously mentioned that I was 17 stone, and he made a bit of a comment about putting on a stone in a year - I didn't correct him by pointing out that it was well under a year ago that I told him I was 17 stone.

Now, a couple of things here. The most significant is that I am 7 stone heavier than my best friend which is, for those of you who prefer to use any kind of normal units, 98 pounds. I am about a hundred pounds heavier than this man. I felt fucking huge.

Then of course, is the acknowledgement of how big I've gotten. I think because we joke so much, having him take a step back and evaluate and conclude yeah, this guy has gotten fucking fat, no joking, no quip or tease, was really fucking hot.

We're both going to a wedding in August and are sharing an AirBnB that happens to have a hot tub. The last time he will have seen me shirtless will have been about two years and three stone ago, so I'm excited to see his reaction. Now I'm thinking though, could I get up to 19 stone by then? More? What will his reaction be, I wonder, if I'm stood there in some XL swim shorts, mentioning I had to buy some new ones because my old ones didn't fit, and just drop in that I've put on yet another stone. It's odd motivation maybe, but it's really pushed me and I've been hitting 4k and 5k calories this past week. Who knows, maybe I'll hit 20 stone by that wedding.

[toreodere]

Im have become bored whunce again! so here's a couple of rough doodles from my college sketchbook, sorry the last one is very blurry, the page kept curving and I couldn't hold it down and take a photo at the same time ,h.

[heilos]

I've been hella busy with a lot of irl stuff recently between work and music video production, but to anyone who sent me really nice random messages about my art or music requests when i was feeling stressed, sincerely thank you so much. ;v;

[voidsnarrator]

Man I'm back on the "I wish if I asked for writing requests someone would send me something"

I want to write fun TSP oneshots 👏👏

To the like five TSP liking followers I have:

Send me TSP writing prompts of any and all kinds 👏

AUs, dialogue prompts, endings, scenarios, pretty much anything. I'm really in the mood for writing random little oneshots ;3;

[statichvm]

hater supreme

[andillwriteyouatragedy]

being an adult = saying things like "i have dnd tonight so i HAVE to take a nap this afternoon or i WILL be cranky"

[aromantic-diaries]

I'm not lonely because I'm aromantic I'm lonely because I'm akward as hell and not very approachable

[sincosma]

I know this connection has already been talked about in excess, but as someone that was deep in the doctor who fandom in the early 2010s, I think this recent and violent obsession with good omens is really just revealing i have an uncontrollable desire for tragic love stories that involve David Tennant and a lovable blonde.

[white-flower-blooming]

Maomao will willingly eat Xie Lian's food every day for the sake of testing its poisonous effects. To her, his food is sweet nectar.

[drippyboycunt]

me: i'm gonna do something productive when i get home

me when i get home: t4t sex t4t sex t4t sex t4t

[newtness532]

person who has been thinking about sleep since she opened her eyes can't stop procrastinating going to sleep

[mediocremelatonin235]

A rant on Pavitir

As a South Asian ( particularly South Indian) it is SO REFRESHING to see someone who is on all accounts UNAPOLAGETICALLY DESI AND PROUD OF IT. This is someone who grew up in the US for a good majority of my life, and one of the few instances of representation I usually get is A: Desi people trying to be white B: Desi people mocking THEIR OWN accents for cheap laughs and validation. or C: Just people who unpack their internalized racism later in the series but it takes FUCKING FOREVER to do so.

And Pavitir does not do any of these things, he is proud of where he was from THROUGH THE GATE WITH NO HESITATION. It might not seem much to you but to me, it means a whole lot. Seeing cultural influence, his charisma, and his accent being celebrated and not stereotyped just makes my heart warm.

I get the chai tea bit can be dated but keep in mind it took YEARS for this to be animated and they were probably doing the voice acting before the animation. Other than that he is the only desi rep based in the US that doesn't want to make me rip my eyes out of my eye socket

[heilos]

Thinking thoughts out loud again, but everything that's been going on with AI and the disrespect towards our entertainment industries and artists as individuals has actually had the exact opposite affect on me where i'm far more spiteful in wanting to make new artwork more then ever before. I'm so so angry and I think my brain wants to channel that anger into projects that I've been putting off for too long instead of letting an overwhelming feeling of apathy take over. If I can't stop assholes from scrapping or stealing mine or my friends shit then at the very least I can still make things that I know people who care about artists will appreciate and that's enough for me for now. I'll know it's not a cheap imitation trying to be something it's not. It's my own authentic work dammit and I'm gonna love making it and sharing it no matter what.