#only time i appreciated it was when it was like -20 degrees and i had to wear like 3-4 layers lol

[keeps-ache]

hats are pretty neat things. how many kinds of hats are there? some are Plops, some are Brimmed, some do not serve any Practical Function, some are not even Fashionable but they're Funny To Look At, some are Very Big! and some are So Small you have to pin them to your head! hats are neat :)

[antxlss]

but, you’re my boss I

pairing: anakin skywalker x reader (modern au)

summary: you and your best friend, padmé have a movie night. she gets tired of you complaining about your lack of a love life and takes matters into her own hands.

warnings: conversation about a sexual interaction

words: 1.3k

a/n: first part is finally out! if you guys know me, you know i’m a slow writer. i hope you guys enjoy the first chapter of this series. once again i’d like to thank the anon that requested this, i hope to do it justice. fair warning this is starting off slow, not a lot of anakin interaction yet. i hope it was worth the wait. as always, feedback is greatly appreciated! ~ max :)

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series masterlist | my masterlist

Your life is boring.

Everyday was the same. Work, eat, sleep, and occasionally go out with your only friend, Padmé. You worked a 9-5 at a big engineering company. You're a receptionist for the customer service department of the company. This is just a job to keep you stable while you complete your master's degree in forensic psychology, then you'll be on your merry way making triple what you make right now.

You hated the job, taking calls, making copies, faxing documents, but you have to keep food on the table. Not to mention your boss is a prick.

It's not like you ever talked to him. The company is huge and he would never spend time to talk to a lowly customer service representative like you. But that's exactly why he's a prick.

Anakin Skywalker. The face of Skywalker Engineering. He's young, late 20's. He's filthy rich. Always has been. He inherited the business from his family and you can only assume he'll pass it on to his children. He's never known what it's like to struggle and you despise him for it, despite never talking to him at all.

You are wrapping up another dreadful day at work, at least it's Friday, when you get a call. You pick up your phone to see who it is, it's Padmé. Who else would it be? You click the answer button and tuck your phone between your ear and shoulder so you can continue to finish up clearing your desk.

"Hey Mé, what's up?" You greet.

"I'm coming over tonight and I'm staying the night and we are gonna binge Harry Potter because I haven't watched it in forever." Padmé rambled.

"Oh my gosh you read my mind." You groaned.

"What can I say? I'm good like that." You could practically hear Padmé's smirk through the phone. "I'll be over at 7."

"Sounds good, I'm about to leave work." You informed.

"Okay, drive safe, I love you!" Padmé finishes.

"I love you, see you later." You reply and hang up.

You quickly finish up, start to grab your things. You are so excited to see Padmé, it's nice to have things to do on the weekends.

You swing your purse over your shoulder and head to the elevator. You press the down button and step in and click the lobby floor. The doors begin to slide closed when all of a sudden they retract back as a hand slides in between them at the last moment.

In steps your boss, Anakin Skywalker.

He keeps his eyes forward and doesn't even glance at you. You shift uncomfortably, the silence becoming awkward, in your mind, very quickly.

"But you faxed those papers over, correct?" Anakin asks with a concerned tone.

What is he taking about? You were the only other person on the elevator, he had to be taking to you.

"Uh- I'm sorry?" You stuttered.

"One second Janet." Anakin taps his ear on the opposite side that you're standing on. "Did you say something?" He turned towards you.

Holy shit. He was using an earpiece.

"No! No, I'm sorry." You wanted to just disappear.

Anakin quickly faced forward again, unfazed, and continued his conversation. As soon as the elevator doors opened you jetted out and practically ran to your car trying your best to forget about that moment. Knowing you, it would haunt your late night thoughts for the rest of your life.

~

It was now 6:30 and you were fixing up your living room all cozy for when Padmé gets here. You get blankets and throw them on the couch and set out the DVD's. You begin to make popcorn when you hear a key turning in the door signaling that Padmé had made it.

You gave her a key to your apartment as soon as you got it. You and Padmé have been friends since your freshman year of college and quickly grew close. Now you consider her more of a sister than a friend.

"Y/N/N!" Padmé squealed and ran over to you in the kitchen. She jumps on you giving you a big hug.

"Mé! I've missed you so, so much." You match her energy. You squeeze her back and finally pull away.

"I've missed you too! So much has happened bitch, you don't even know." She walks over to the cabinet that you keep your wine in.

"Spill." You state simply. 

You grab the popcorn from the microwave and start to pour it in the bowl.

"Okay so you know how I've been seeing that guy Mark, right?" She asks while pouring 2 glasses of wine.

You nod in confirmation and grab the glass of wine from Padmé.

"Well last night he stayed over..."

"No way, bitch! Did you fuck him?" You ask excitedly.

"Yes..." She starts.

"You whore! I bet his dick is so big, how was it..."

Padmé cuts you off. "It was so bad. Like I was ready to die."

"Really? But he's so hot. It's always the hot ones." You roll your eyes. "I want all the hard, wet, nasty details."

She gags. "One, that's fucking disgusting. Two, it actually was the worst sex I've ever had. So we get done with dinner right? And I thought he would invite me to his place but he literally asks me to come to mine. That should've been the first red flag, but you know, he's hot so I ignored it."

You snort and nod your head then take a sip of your wine.

Padmé continues. "So we get to my place and I can't even get in the door before his hands are on me. Not in a hot way by the way. So I push him off me and I lead him to the bedroom so we can properly fuck. Well we lay down and we are making out. He literally started dry humping like a fucking dog. Again, not in the hot way."

"What a turn off." You cringe.

"Tell me about it bitch. So I rush undressing him because I actually thought he was gonna cum just by humping me. Then we are both fully undressed."

"How big?" You interrupt.

"Average, nothing special." She replies. "Anyway, he puts it in and in five seconds he's having an orgasm."

"That's a major ick" You grimace.

"For real. The he had the nerve to ask me if I got off."

"Mé, I hope you didn't let him stay after that." You laugh.

"I didn't even have to kick him out, he just got dressed and left." She explained.

"What a dickhead."

"It's not over though." She grins. "I just matched with his brother on tinder and he is a thousand times hotter."

"That's a such a cunty move, I respect it." You elbow her and she laughs in response.

After a few seconds of comfortable silence you decide to break it.

"Your life is so exciting. I swear I just live vicariously through you."

"That's depressing. Come on, what happened to the Tinder account we sat up?" Padmé asks.

"Every guy I matched with was a fucking creep." You groan. "I'm just about to become celibate or a lesbian or something."

"Okay, I'm tired of hearing it." She shuts you down. "I'm setting you up on a blind date."

You laugh. "Absolutely not."

"Y/N, you just said it. Your life is boring, you can't find any guys, you're going to become celibate. You're desperate. Meaning you are in no position to turn down this offer."

"Okay, fine." You sigh.

"I'll set it up and text you the details later. I think I have the perfect guy in mind." She smirks.

"Whatever, let's just watch Harry Potter now." You get up and grab the popcorn and make your way to the couch. You and Padmé binge the movies all weekend long.

[harmoonix]

❤️Love Astrology Observations❤️

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❤️ Near, far, wherever you are ❤️

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❤️: Juno sextile/trine/conjunct Juno in synastry loves physical touch and is an very intimate placement, they love their partners with their hearts at the deepest love

❤️: Venus trine/sextile/conjunct Jupiter makes the native extremely beautiful and lovely, they have a very natural charm that catches your attention instead

❤️: Taurus Degrees (2°, 14°, 26°) these degrees feel like a lullaby, something that catches your whole energy and vibe, something that gives you goosebumps, something so beautiful

❤️:My precious Libra and Taurus Moons reading this post,I imagine them as Venus littles kids, they are full of love, passion, harmony and peace like their vibe is literally like the moonlight

❤️: Jupiter in Libra or at Libra Degrees (7°, 19°) they are the biggest romantics out there, they are extremely beautiful and charming, they can also attract a lot of attention because of their beauty

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❤️: Jupiter in Leo or at Leo Degrees (5°, 17°) are always in the spotlight, my dear darlings, they are so adorable and often have a specific kind of vibe they give you warm in soul I can't even describe it is something you feel on the moment

❤️: Neptune aspecting Venus is often a very beautiful placement if we talk about appearance and personality, they are gorgeous Inside and out, full of a calm vibe

❤️: Cancer Degreess (4°, 16°, 28°) pure energy always, as the moon is radiating that's how they are also radiate, they are angelic and kind

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Love can touch us one time

And last for a lifetime

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❤️: Virgo/Gemini placements are so full of beauty they represent the youthfulness, the energy of young age, their aura is something else is something holy I swear

❤️: Scorpio Degrees (8°, 20°) so romantic and full of intensity, they are night chill breeze at the moons light, they give me the queen in red dress dancing in the moonlight vibe

❤️: Pisces Degrees (12°, 24°) angelic vibe 1000/100, they are so otherworldly and magical, is always something mystic about them that have it in their eyes. You can see in their eyes how magical they are

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❤️: Venus aspecting Moon are the aspects of love, the native is full of love inside and out and they should be appreciated more, they love to share THE LOVE they have is something you get only once in life

❤️: Mercury aspecting Venus is the type of love when you fall in love with someone's voice, but also falling in love with their touch, with their looks, with their feelings, emotions... eveythinggg

❤️: Mercury at Libra Degrees (7°. 19°), everything is love, everything is pink, everything is romantic, their voice, their gestures, their communicating

❤️: Venus in Water Signs really love intense and is something crazy when you find out how big their love is, is like something that never ends esp Venus in Pisces wow I met so many Venus in Pisces people who are lovely til heaven and back

❤️: "I always choose you" are the vibes of someone with Cancer Placements, they are extremely kind and generous, and lovely

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❤️: Venus conjunct Pluto = Love at the first sight, everything is so powerful when you met someone with this aspect, they are like the love you always wanted to have but you had to wait for it

❤️: Aphrodite Asteroid (1388) in the 1st house is beautiful, beautiful with everything, very pretty very charming very chatty you always catch the eye

❤️: Aphrodite in the 5th house feels like a beautiful nymph who dancing in the lake at midnight and animals are watching her dancing just like a fairytale

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Every night in my dreams

I see you, I feel you

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❤️: Aphrodite in the 4th house feels like that person who's eyes you will remember for the rest of your life, you will fall in love with their eyes first and then their hearts, they may look identical like their mother (always receiving "you look exactly like your mother" type of thing)

❤️: Aphrodite in the 7th house will fall easily in love with their *right* partner, beautiful relationship and romantic gestures are always on spot and full of flirt

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❤️: "You look wonderful tonight" gives Sun - Venus aspects, they are so in love and so full of enthusiasm with the right partners around them

❤️: Can we talk how full of clinginess and full of gestures someone with Mercury in Capricorn Degrees will have? (10° 22°) they pretend to not show it and then they let the guard off IS SO HOT

❤️: Hebe asteroid (6) shows enteral youth, in aspects with MC/ascendant you look like a fairy to the public, you also may look younger than you usually are

❤️: Helena (the most beautiful) 101 - aspecting Sun -OMG they gorge - gorgeous, they are full of light, their eyes are full of light, the life is full of light so cute

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❤️: Helena in aspects with Uranus you may have hitting beauty, something unique that put you in a crowd of the highest, it gives something like "From all of them you'll always be my favorite"

❤️: Something is so special about loving someone with their Venus in an earth sign, you 2 grow together and go through everything together, is something that gives "we stick together baby" Is honestly so pure

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Love was when I loved you

One true time I'd hold to

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❤️: Venus at Water Degrees (4°, 8°, 12°, 16°, 20°, 24°,28°) are very romantic people and they can fall in love so deeply, their emotions are so strong yet they can be a bit shy at dates… They are soulmate material

❤️: Juno in the 12th house/Juno in Pisces Degrees [12°, 24°] or Juno in in Pisces is very karmic, your spouse can be someone very romantic with an interest for spirituality/meditation

❤️: Juno in the 9th house/Juno at Sag Degrees [9°, 21°] or Juno in Sagittarius can find their spouses or lovers in foreign countries or while traveling somewhere new for them, they can also meet at the highschool or college with their lovers

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❤️: Sun in the 7th house will focus themselves on relationships pretty much in this life, is like they cannot function without an relationship and partner, they need someone who will be always beside them (This can apply also if you have your 7th house ruled by the Sun)

❤️: Pluto in the 7th house is a very deeply and lovely placement, you'll have so many intense and memorable days with your partner in your relationship (This can apply also if your 7th house is ruled by Pluto)

❤️: Saturn aspecting Moon give the vibes of an white dove 🕊️, so pure of the energy yet so in pain, they are probably the kindest people to exist. Full of purity 🪷

❤️: Venus at 0° or 29° degrees has to end and start a cycle in lives, Venus at 29° degrees feels like there are only 2 people left on earth and all they have is only love while Venus at 0° degrees feels like the couple is at the highest love level and everything around them is in perfect balance

❤️: Venus in the 6th house is the type of person who will be their partners biggest helper, they are so supportive and loyal and clingy and aslo attracted to loyal people

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❤️: Jupiter and Lilith aspects can make you hypersexual/to radiate a lot of sexual energy, Jupiter expands Lilith's energy to make you radiate some kind of "sensuality" around you and the thing is that you can't always see this energy [harsh aspects are more intense

❤️: Having a Stellium in the 7th house (3 or more than 3 planets in that house) makes the native to want to be relationship very bad, esp if Venus is there, the native will seek for a partner and for love/bounding

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You're here, there's nothing I fear

And I know that my heart will go on

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❤️: Asteroid Cupido [763] in the 6th/10th/11th houses, with this asteroid in those houses makes the people around you to find you attractive and aswell at your job, colleagues can end up crushing over you and that can happen randomly sometimes

❤️: Every intense love story starts with someone having Mercury - Venus or Venus - Pluto aspects in their charts, it ends up HOT

❤️: "We are bonded for life" gives Moon - Pluto and Moon - Venus vibes so much I swear they are the type of people who bound so easily with people

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❤️ When I first created the conception of this post I wanted to create something different than the couple pictures from Pinterest, I wanted something iconic, an iconic love story and from few stories i chose Titanic since is one of the best love movies ever ❤️

❤️ Hello dear darlings, hope you have a good day full of good and light energy, today I want to bring you lovely observations with some Titanic aesthetic ❤️

Fun Fact: I also analyzed Leonardo DiCaprio's charts and Kate Winslet's birt chart and I introduced some of their aspects in this post aswell❤️

❤️ I hope you have an wonderful and lovely day together with the people you love and with good vibes, never forget how important you are and how powerful you are ❤️

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With a lot of love and hugs, Harmoonix

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Harmoonix2023®

[queers-gambit]

Affirmation King

prompt: ( requested ) attending university as a full-time student is hard, but your boyfriend makes some of the stress worth it.

fandom masterlist: FX's The Bear

word count: 3.1k+

note: author gives unsolicited advice in the form of sharing a citation website to make college essays a little easier! this is not meant as promotion or anything, it's just your author trying to share a resource they know of.

warnings: cursing, small hurt large comfort (reader snaps a little at Carmy but he handles it like a fucking pro), author gives unsolicited college advice in the form of a recommended website, reader is in a masters program and not undergrad, fluff.

The 16 inch screen glared into your retinas, fingers feeling numb from the hours pounding away at the loose keyboard. When the screen started to warble and darken, your head ducked down slightly to try and preserve your visual; glaring up at the offender when they pressed the screen closed after forcing you to retract your hands.

"You're cute and all, but not so cute as to interrupt me like that," you deadpanned, eyes wide and burning from your lack of lubrication via blinking.

"You've been sat here for hours, it's time for a break."

"Funny when I say that to you, it's always, 'Get outta my kitchen.'"

Carmy smirked, "Come eat something."

"Let me finish this essay and - "

"No, it's time for a meal."

You felt your irritation spike, narrowing your eyes slightly, "I'm on a deadline, Carmen, so either be fucking helpful and productive or get the fuck out of my space. I've got work to do and you're just slowing me down."

He offered a patient look, asking, "Is that what you really wanted to say?"

You paused, then shook your head, "No... May I try again?"

"Of course," he nodded.

"I appreciate you trying to... Alleviate some of my stress," you spoke slowly, stringing the sentence together in realtime, "but this project isn't something I can ignore right now, so, I'd like to finish this thing before we do whatever else."

"Better," he teased, knowing you ran a short fuse when stressed out and overworked. "What's got you riled up?"

"I have this 20-page paper due."

"20 pages!?"

"It's not that bad, honestly, once you have your thesis together," you chuckled dryly. "it's just time consuming and meticulous."

He frowned and stepped forward to press a kiss to your forehead, mocking in a sarcastic tone, "You're doing amazing, sweetie."

"I'm so tired," you pouted up at him. "Do I really need this degree? This is so much stress for such a little thing such as a piece of paper that cost me $50k just to say I'm allowed to join the work force."

"Hey, hey," he laughed. "Just remember what you're working towards. You're one assignment closer to your internship turning into a full-time gig, right?"

You nodded, "You're right. I want that job so bad... I just hate how busy I feel - it's like, how can I remember to eat let alone write 6 different response posts to my classmate's work?"

Carmy nodded with empathy, "Just remember that end goal, baby. Keep grinding, keep moving. Almost at the finish line, right?"

"Right," you nodded with a smile. "Thank you, angel face."

Carmy smiled at you before softly asking, "Want me to bring you anything? Something to eat, drink, a condom?"

"Stop quoting Mean Girls at me!"

His hands shot up in defense, deflecting, "I was just trying to be a gracious host. If the missus wants anything, I'll make sure she has it."

"Pretty sure 'missus' is a term used for wives - " His groan made you laugh lightly, then covering, "No, thank you, baby, I'm okay. I should only be about another hour or so...?"

"All right, yeah, sure. I'll start dinner in 30, okay?"

"Sure," you smiled, already distracted again as you lifted your screen again to stare at the Word document that had been haunting your hard-drive for about 3 weeks now.

"Hey," he interrupted, "don't forget your glasses."

"Thank you," you mumbled, reaching for the special, blue-light filtering glasses Carmy had gifted you when you first started your Master's program. He claimed staring at a computer screen was going to cause long-term damage (he read an article) and got you a pair, which, you had to admit, made a huge difference.

Your hair was raked into a new bun as you reread the last of your essay, trying to get back in the academic mindset in order to finish the last bit of your assignment. There were textbooks spewed around your work table; laptop plugged in, highlighters and pens and notebooks within reach and a nearly-finished bottle of water was set to the side. You wrote ferociously once you got back on the right mental track, feeling your headache stir to life as you blindly reached for your water bottle.

However, when you picked it up, you blinked in mild shock when the bottle was heavier than before. Glancing over, you realized Carmy had replaced the bottle because there, under where it had sat, he left you a handwritten note:

replenish what you lost from crying!

You chuckled, knowing you were a stress cryer and when tackling big assignments like this, you were ten times as stressed as usual. Still you worked, even putting your headphones on to play soothing background noise - like rainfall. Your neck cramped, back ached, temples throbbed, and hands were cramping. Still you worked, using sticky notes to flag the important quotes you wanted to use from your textbooks and notebooks. Your stomach growled, your eyes begged for reprieve, chest felt tight, and shoulders were too tense.

Still. You. Worked.

Deadlines were important to you, and while you were a professional procrastinator, you always turned everything in on time - no matter your mental state. You could smell whatever Carmy had started cooking, focused on writing as you only used spellcheck as you went - and still you worked. You knew you surpassed the hour limit you told Carmy, but you couldn't stop, you were so close to finishing, it almost put tears back in your eyes, but this time out of relief. You only paused to look at online sources and apply chapstick, cracking your tightly-wound knuckles, and when you finished the last body paragraph of the essay, grinned to yourself.

All that was left was your conclusion, to create a bibliography, and to edit - but you were almost home free!

Suddenly, you jumped in fright when a hand planted on your shoulder; whipping around to see your boyfriend's own startled expression. "Sorry," Carmy apologized with a wince when you removed your headphones, "didn't mean to scare you, just wanted to check on you."

You nodded, 'Yeah, no, I'm almost done. Like give me 20 minutes, almost done-almost done."

He smiled softly, "Dinner's ready when you are."

"I'll be there soon, thank you, angel face."

"Can I help with anything?"

"Uh," you cocked your head, "you know what? Maaaaybe..."

"Really?" He grinned, perking up. "You never let me help!"

"It's not really work, per se," you amended, "but would you mind letting me read this out loud to you - see if it makes sense? The mark of a good writer is to act as if the audience knows nothing about the subject and make them understand, and you're exactly that."

"Lemme hear it," he nodded, taking a seat, "I might not be much help but I can still try."

You agreed and finished typing the outline of your conclusion, then scrolled to the top of your word document, and explained to him what your class was before starting to read. He listened intently, sitting on a spare stool with his elbows resting on his knees; keeping him leaned forward to provide his undivided attention. You managed to reword a few sentences, only noticing they didn't make sense when you read them out loud. Once or twice, Carmy even offered an alternative phrasing you liked - making the changes and rereading, then continuing through your assignment.

By the end, you were able to beef up the conclusion and Carmy was grinning at you in pride. "That's real good, baby," he complimented, "it all made sense and rolled nice together. I think that has to be an 'A'-worthy paper."

"You should be the one grading theses, my professor's the worst," you frowned. "It's why I got so in my head, I got a fucking 76 on my last essay and need to do really well on the next few to help average my grade."

"What about the tests?"

"We don't have any, this class is all about writing material and turning it in," you pouted.

"Hey," he spoke seriously, making you look at him in question, "I'm really proud of you."

You giggled nervously, "Oh, yeah? Why? What for?"

"For doing this," he nodded to the desk. "Look at all you're doing, baby, there's no way I'd ever be able to keep up with this kinda shit. You're doing such a great fucking job - I want you to remember that. What you're doing ain't easy, but you're handling this like a pro."

"I cry, like, everyday..."

"So what? You still get shit done while emoting - call that multitasking, baby."

"Got me there."

"Seriously, though, you're not told enough what a fantastic job you're doing; how strong and resilient you have to be to deal with this kind of stress day-in and day-out. I see the hard work you put in," he promised, "and I want you to know how fucking proud I am of you. It's all gonna be worth it one day, but until then, I love watching you grind through school. I might not take the classes with you, but I'll help however I can, whenever I can."

"Thank you," you whispered. "It's really nice to hear... I feel myself burning out and it's nice to be reminded that what I do now will influence my future. Validates me in feeling stressed out, you know? Sometimes, I feel silly 'cause, like, there's so many bigger things to be upset about and here I am, stressed out at a place that's guaranteed to stress me out..."

"It's not silly, it's normal. College ain't easy," he reminded, "and you're just trying to keep yourself afloat."

"Yeah, but there's bigger things in life than something trivial as my education."

Carmy scoffed at you, shaking his head, "Ain't no way."

"What?"

"My girl just said her feelings are trivial... Nah, she said her emotions about her education is trivial," he shook his head again. "Should wash your mouth out with soap - talkin' crazy like that. Baby, you know, first and foremost, your education is high on our priorities list, but your emotions? You think they're trivial? Nah, if anything causes you to have any emotion, it's valid - it's not something silly or redundant."

You pouted slightly, "You always know what to say."

"Hungry?"

"You're the perfect man," you laughed, looking at your document again and humming. "Okay, so, lemme just cite my sources and turn this in."

"Then you wanna have date night?" He smirked.

"No, no, I'm so tired - "

"I meant we can stay in."

"Oh, then count me in!"

"Change into something cozy when you're done, we can watch a movie with dinner. Yeah?"

You agreed, accepted his kiss of encouragement, and then took his leave to reheat the dinner that had surely cooled off. It didn't take long to cite everything when you used an online citation source website - that IS N O T plagiarizing! It's a handy-dandy tool you discovered your undergraduate freshman year by an actual professor. It was as simple as choosing which style, APA or MLA, and then to either paste the URL of the website you need sourced or you type in the book's information. Hit the generate button and BAM! A perfect citation for your bibliography every single time.

Or if you didn't like that, you could always just Google citation examples and do your best to write it out yourself. But the website, Citation Machine dot net, was a great tool. After perfecting your in-text citations and saving your work, you uploaded it to your university's assignment portal, crossed the essay off your to-do list, and stretched on your feet.

Cleaning up your space minimally, you hustled to your bedroom to get a quick hot, relieving shower, change, and then met Carmy in the kitchen. "Hey," you sighed with a soft smile.

"Hey, doll. All done?"

"For tonight," you groaned, "but tomorrow's a new day with new assignments."

"That's a future problem we'll handle at a later time," he eased, showing you your dinner plate. "Ta-daaaa!"

You grinned, "Oh, baby, this looks amazing!"

"Yeah, well, I kinda figured as a full-time student right now, nobody was gonna remind you what incredible job you're doing, so, I'm more than happy to step up to the plate. And what better treat than your favorite meal, huh?"

"Thank you," you whispered, pecking his lips.

You often thought his love language was "food", but then you realized it was technically under the acts of service and quality time. He loved cooking for you - it was like a gift. He loved cooking with you - it was time spent bonding. He loved introducing you to new dishes - it's a present! He loved when you let him give you a culinary lesson - it was time well spent.

"C'mon," Carmy lead you to the living room, both crashing on the couch you had been gifted from your grandmother's house when she was put in a nursing home. Normally, you wouldn't have splurged on something like this, but considering it was free, you and Carmy were happy to use it. Settling together on the couch, you got cozy under a shared blanket and Carmy flicked some movie on for background noise, but instead of watching, he just asked you about your coursework.

You told him what you could, shaking your head and huffing about how annoying your program was. How hectic. How jam packed and fast-paced it all seemed to be. How your head felt like it was spinning. How you couldn't nail down workable coping mechanisms and just felt totally out of control. You were spiraling.

You needed this rant session.

Carmy listened intently.

He never once tried to say, "oh, but if you had time management," or anything like, "if you do THIS instead..." or some bullshit, "my way works better." His bright and wide blue eyes watched you the entire time, sighing when you got to the end of your meal and vent session.

"It just feels like, I turn in one assignment, I get three more right after. Turn in those three, and all of a sudden, there's another 10!"

"Does the syllabus say anything about that?" He wondered.

"No, it just said what our reading schedules were and when major assignments are due. But those dates all got shuffled around that it feels like a train wreck. You know, if the original schedule was kept from the syllabus, I wouldn't feel so worked up! It's the rearrangement and added assignments without warning that's throwing me off."

"That doesn't sound easy," he validated. "Anything I can do to help?"

"No, you're doing more than enough," you whispered, pecking his lips. "Thank you for dinner."

"I made dessert, too."

"No!" You gasped with a grin.

"Mhm - wait here. I'll grab it."

"Wow, dinner, movie, and dessert?" You teased, "I'm being spoiled tonight."

"You've been working your ass off for weeks now," he smirked, standing from his seat to pick up your plates, "this is the least I could do. I know I said it, but you know how good a job you're doing, right? Damn, baby," he chuckled, "ain't no way I could ever handle shit like that on the regular."

"I could't do what you do, either."

"We all balance our crazy different. Want some tea? Wine?"

"Tea would be great."

"Comin' up."

When Carmy returned, you pulled the blanket back to let him sit again with the dessert plate between you both; two steaming mugs of tea sat on the coffee table. "What's this?" You wondered, seeing a sort of pastry.

"Marcus told me 'bout this," he chuckled. "Kinda like a poor man's version of this one thing he makes. So, look, it's Pillsbury Crescent Rolls, right? In the middle, there's raspberry preserves - or jam if you want that instead. It's baked then drizzled in melted white chocolate."

"Wow, you got all fancy on me," you beamed.

"Hardly, more like I was a little impulsive after hearing your essay. Figured you could use some dessert - you really earned it, baby. You always earn dessert," he grinned, "but tonight, you were kickass. Know that? Hear me?"

You shook your head, "This is nothing compared - "

"Hey, hey, nah," he interrupted, "nah, nah, don't do that, don't try to invalidate or downplay yourself. Look, shit is always hard in college, right? But you handle it so well, I can see the work you're putting in and the little reward you receive in return, and know that shit's gotta add up for you. But my baby just keeps cool, does her work, and does what she can to earn the grades she does. Right?"

"I mean, I try to..."

"You succeed. C'mon, lemme hear you say it. 'I kick college's ass.'"

"I kick college's ass."

"'I work hard.'"

"Carmy - "

"Saaay it!"

You huffed, "I work hard."

"'I'm an incredible hard worker.'"

"I'm an incredible hard worker."

"'I am only human.'"

Another breath in, repeating, "I am only human."

"'I am a success.'"

"I try to be a success."

"That wasn't the quote."

"Well, I don't know if I'm succeeding because grades aren't finalized yet and I have - "

"No, no, no," he smirked again, "you're still successful 'cause you're doing such a kickass job. You could get a fucking 'D' on something, and guess what? You're still successful 'cause you don't let this tear you down, you learn from mistakes and apply whatever lessons you learn to your upcoming assignments. Some people say you might even learn more from losing and failing than from undisputed success. Look, I'll be honest, I thought my job was hectic as shit, but hearing your essay tonight? Goddamn, you're not just beautiful, but so fucking intelligent, too. Baby, I was shook - that sounded like some academic paper that college kids need to defend their thesis or some shit. Something scholarly, not some assignment you gotta hand in by a deadline so you just wrote down whatever. So, give yourself credit and tell yourself you're a success."

With a long, deep breath, you answered earnestly, "I'm a success."

"Good girl," he muttered, handing you a fork finally. However, unlike Mikey all those years ago, you didn't launch your utensil at anyone and used it to cut off a corner of pastry.

You moaned when you tasted the gooey goodness. You managed through a mouthful, "Mmhhh! Mhm! Mhm! If you make this every time I have some assignment pissing me off and stressing me out, I'm afraid I'll get used to this treatment."

Carmy grinned, "You deserve whatever dessert you want, whenever you want. Huh? Yeah? Lemme hear you say it."

With another grin, you mused, "I deserve whatever I want, when I want it... And however I want it!"

"Atta girl!"

"You're so fucking corny," you laughed lightly, feeling as if you were falling in love with him again, "but thank you, my Affirmation King."

requesting rules and masterlist

The Bear masterlist

[wonwayne]

cold season ☁️ lee heeseung

pairing : bff!heeseung x gn!reader genre : fluff, comfort warnings : mentions of food word count : 0.6k

a/n : flirty heeseung with zero survival instinct comes to cuddle while you’re sick.

“you look so hot right now.”

you winced your eyes open to look incredulously up at your doe-eyed best friend. it’s too damn bright in this room, you thought, as your head continued pounding. there were more things about the condition of your room you were unhappy with at the moment: the suffocating humidity from you staying cooped up here with the doors closed for nearly three days straight; the mess of your bedside table, littered with tissues and soaked tea bags; and your own nightmarish appearance, violated by swollen eyes and hair matted by sweat. you felt somewhat sheepish, letting yourself be perceived by heeseung in this state, but you were also too relieved to see him to shoo him away — or register the undertone of his comment.

“yeah, that’s a 101 degree fever for you.” your voice was so nasal, you wondered if the words were actively coming out your nose.

heeseung pouted, taking your clammy hand in his cool ones. “have you eaten? want me to order soup?”

you shook your head weakly. “no need.”

“to eat? humanity has proved otherwise.”

you rolled your eyes, trying to slip your hand out of his grip, but he held on tight.

“chicken noodle would be a bit basic, wouldn’t it? maybe something spicier? gamjatang?” with his free hand, he was opening the delivery app on his phone. “when i had that nasty cold like a month ago, this place absolutely saved me—”

“i really appreciate the thought, hee, but i swear i’ve got no appetite.” you squeezed his hand this time, hoping that, like a chinese finger trap, he’d let you go because of it.

when he showed no signs of doing so, you added, “do you really want that nasty cold back? i’ve been quarantining for a reason, idiot.”

heeseung only chuckled at the nickname. “perfect, just ordered. should be coming in the next 20 minutes or so.”

“heeseung.” you used all the energy left in you not to sound pathetically silly.

“yes, darling?”

you frowned at his response. “you’re seriously calling me darling right now? when i look like this?”

“’course i am,” and he took your hand up to his lips for the softest, sweetest peck, “as i said, you look so incredibly hot.”

suddenly, you felt the urge to punch him for being so unserious. (and for making you blush from more than your heightened body temperature.) but instead, against your will, you found yourself tugging him by the hand with such raw, instant force that he lost his balance, falling over you onto the bed and narrowly missing the headboard.

on second thought, you hadn’t seized him with that much force — definitely not enough to trip him over. but before you could open your mouth to apologize, at least out of courtesy, heeseung was adjusting himself to lie parallel to you, hand still intertwined in yours.

“ah,” he sighed, turning onto his side and shifting closer to you so that his face was almost entirely buried in your neck, “your bed is insanely comfortable.”

you sniffled in faux disgust, sliding to the edge of the mattress as if you actually had a chance of escaping his embrace. much to your surprise, he pulled you right back into him by your waist.

“your white blood cells are so pissed at you right now,” you huffed, trying not to betray how flustered you were by his touch.

“okay, nerd,” he shot back, snuggling ever closer into your backside. “you know, i’m starting to regret ordering that gamjatang.”

“and why is that?”

“because now that i’m here, i’d never want to leave your side.”

[tteokdoroki]

*ੈ🌩️‧₊˚— earbuds, my love + yoichi isagi.

૮˶ᵕ ༝ᵕ˶ა synopsis — a single train ride has you sharing your headphones and your feelings with your long time crush, yoichi isagi.

⭑ warnings — please read + mdni ! characters aged up to 20s, fluff, friends to lovers, love confessions, mutual pining, pro player!isagi, fem!reader - not beta read !

⭑ words — 1K.

⭑ notes — third fic queued for aali's away time, one of my many isagi wips! he's literally ceo of friends to lovers ngl !! i love him so bad... enjoy my lurvs - m.list ✩

“this song makes me feel like i’m falling in love with someone.”

isagi glances up at you from his phone, no longer shuffling the playlist that you’re both listening to. you’re looking out of the window, your feet propped up on the back of the seat in front of you, your head resting on your closed fist. you miss the way he flushes red.

“do you want to keep listening to it then?” he mumbles softly, thumb hovering over the slip button and his voice just barely above a whisper. you almost don’t hear you despite the fact that you’re sharing headphones and only have one ear-bud in while he takes the other.

this time, you tilt your head away from the window and the scenery passing by to lock eyes with your childhood best friend. “no, s’okay,” you say, your voice equally as low. “you can change it if you’d like.” your facial expression is tranquil, the swell of your lips pressed into an appreciative smile and your eyes sparkling with the sunlight that glitters outside of your moving train.

isagi’s nerves quickly get the better of him and he breaks eye contact, swallowing thickly before looking away with his own smile (mostly for himself).

“i think we’ll keep listening to it.”

you’re both on the train from the bustling city of tokyo back to the tiny town you both grew up in. with the off-season approaching, japan’s beloved striker had finally managed to get some time away from the blue lock team to visit his parents, and you were off on your university’s allotted spring-break.

this was the first time, in what felt like forever, that your calendars were synced up.

your bond with isagi had always been strong — from the very first moment you’d met, back in middle school when he’d kicked a soccer ball straight into your lunch and then instantly offered to buy you a new one. impossible to separate, you were joined at the hip right up until he left for blue lock. these days, your paths rarely cross and while isagi’s career in soccer bloomed like you always knew it would — you went the more traditional route of life and found passion in your own university degree.

after some moments of quiet, aside from the children crying in their mother’s arms, teenagers gossiping on their way home from junior high and the calls from the attendant manning the snack cart — isagi speaks up, shyly. “who…who would you be in love with? yanno…because of this song…”

“some guy, i’ve known him for years.”

“does he know…how you feel about him?” you shake your head and isagi presses you again. “have you tried telling him?”

“gods no, yoichi!” you wave him off almost too quickly — curling in on yourself like a highschool girl handing her crush a confession letter or chocolates on white day. perhaps because this is exactly like that. you’ve liked him, loved him, for as long as you can remember. he makes your skin hot and your thoughts a mess and when isagi’s nearby you hardly remember who you are.

and he hardly realises how lovesick you’ve been for him over the years. it would be too embarrassing to admit that you have a raging crush on one of japan’s favourite athletes.

“why not?”

“because…if he felt the same he would have noticed by now.” you answer, trying to shut down the conversation. “i’ve been obvious with my feelings. the ball’s been in his court for a while.”

“maybe he’s just oblivious.” isagi keeps going and in the cramped space of your train seats you feel hot under the collar — your nerves shaking under the pressure.

you’re given a brief moment of relief when the attendant on the snack cart stops for the couple seated opposite you. they seem happy and in love, it makes your heart twist.

the train jolts, pushing the attendant into isagi, who then topples into you — invading your space once more, causing heat to build up under your skin.

“h-he’s a way too smart for that.”

“maybe…he’s unsure? maybe he doesn’t understand your signals?”

the song you’re listening too changes as you pull into the next station.

“or maybe he doesn’t love me, yoichi!” you snap, turning your head away so fast that the ear-bud slips from your ears and the wires are left dangling between the warmth of isagi’s body and your own. you try to sit still, fighting off burning, frustrated tears — lucky that no one’s heard your outburst over the busy ambience of the train. “believe me, i’ve held out hope for it.”

“but i do love you.” he snaps back, grabbing you by the wrist so that you’re forced to look at him. isagi’s eyes are wide and deep, swirling in their hypnotising shade of blue with an emotion you don’t recognise seeing on him. love. “maybe you’re the one who’s dumb enough not to have noticed. maybe i’ve been too shy or too caught up with soccer to say so. but i love you. i want that song to make you feel like you’re in love with me.”

“o-oh…yoichi i—“ your eyes widen, then soften all at once and you feel yourself melting fast — as if all of your dreams have come true. “i don’t know what to say…”

the tips of his ears are bright pink, the hue blooming across his cheeks like they’re roses in bloom. yoichi chews on his lower lip nervously before shoving the right bud of the headphones back into your ear. “just say you like me back ‘nd we’ll leave it at that for now, okay?” he mumbles like a teenager, very much unlike the confident, cocky isagi who everyone fears on the pitch.

wisps of a grin tug at the corners of your lips as you reach out and grab his larger hand with yours — giving it a squeeze. “alright then, yoichi,” you say, leaning over to kiss the warmth of his cheeks. “i like you too.” his eyes go wide.

this is all silly and new for the both of you — having been in love with one another for years without saying. you’ll have a lot to talk about once you reach his parents’ house, how you’ll make this work with his soccer career and your new life in the big city, what you want this to be, who you’ll tell. but for now you try not to dwell on it, letting your head flop to isagi’s shoulder and his on top of yours, sharing headphones and listening to songs that made him fall in love with you.

[theunbearableweightofpedropascal]

Angel

Summary: Coming home from college without a degree has you scrambling to find your place in the world. Charlie just might be your savior.

A/N: I was thinking this would be set around eclipse. This was in the drafts for a while.

Warnings: Besides an age gap (reader in her 20s Charlie in his 40s) there is none.

Word Count: 3.1K

You didn’t expect your life to turn out the way it did, and neither did the people of Forks. If the confused looks you would get on the way into town were anything to go by. You had been a stellar student, assignments were early if not on time, and teachers never had a bad thing to say about you. You graduated and moved on to college like everyone would expect, but college was harder. It wasn’t even the work, it was you. 

For once you had no set path, everyone else just seemed to know what they wanted to do. After 2 years you realized how far behind you felt you decided to take a break. If you didn’t know what you wanted to do you were just wasting time and money. The loneliness set in soon after too. Although you have friends they’re all off doing their things, making their place in the world. 

Your dad helped if only by sending cringe Facebook posts captioned “It’s never too late.” His efforts were much appreciated but it’s not a good feeling when you feel like you are in last place for a race you didn’t even know you were running. Staying holed up in your room won’t help but at least you won’t have to run into anyone you know. You hate feeling like such a disappointment even though your parents assured you that would never be the case.

After a few weeks of licking your wounds, you started looking for jobs. You reach downtown and begin combing through your options. All of which would require you to run into people who would ask too many questions that you do not want to answer. Forks was already limited in what they had and if you wanted to avoid working for the Newton family your choices were much more slim. But you do take note of it just in case. Syphering through your selections you almost want to give up.

Turning the corner you bump smack into another person, you brace yourself for a fall that doesn’t come. Peeking through one eye you make out a badge and ‘C. Swan’. You immediately straighten yourself up after realizing you just bumped into Chief Swan. 

“You alright-”

“I’m so sorry-”

The both of you speak at the same time, a loud silence fills the air as you both stare at each other. Your wide eyes and his furrowed brow. You snap out of it first and bend down to pick up your fallen pamphlets, The Chief crouches down to help you. 

“You don’t have to do that Chief Swan.” He ignores you in favor of picking up the rest, stealing a glance at them before handing them back to you. 

“Charlie’s fine.” He scratches his head before telling you, “Since you’re looking we could use another receptionist down at the station.” Charlie took pity on you, Although he isn’t one for gossip everyone’s been talking about how you came back from university without finishing. He knows what it feels like to be lost especially in a town like Forks. 

“Really?” The prospect of working at the station was much better than any option sitting in your hands. “Is there anything for me to fill out?”

“No just stop by on Monday and I’ll have Helen walk you through everything.” His mouth forms into what you think is a half-smile, and you return it tenfold.

The conversation with Charlie was so refreshing you’re unsure why out of all the people in Forks he was the one to make you feel normal. You realize it’s because he’s the first person to not question or probe why you’re back here. Working at the station doing administration would be perfect. On your way home you mentally comb through your closet for appropriate clothes you can wear to the station for work. The combination list isn’t huge but you could make it work.

……..

Monday morning you awake at 6:00 am to begin getting ready, he never mentioned a time but you imagine how bad you would look strolling in there at 1:00 pm. You decide on black stretchy office pants, a chocolate sweater, and white sneakers that are comfortable enough to do sustainable walking. Grabbing your backpack you pack your essentials and bid your father goodbye before heading off.

On the way in you have enough time to stop for some coffee so you order for yourself and Charlie as a thank you. You make sure to get his black with no sugar, though you shouldn’t judge a book by its cover you can’t imagine he enjoys cremer. The last stretch of your walk toward the station has your heart pounding. You're not even sure what you are nervous about it shouldn’t be that hard since it’s Forks.

The station smells like stale coffee and mothballs, the atmosphere is mostly static but that’s given. Upon walking up to the front desk you see an older redhead who you assume is Helen. You smile as you approach her and she returns one.

“Excuse me, Chief Swan said to come up here for you to train me on administration stuff.” You hope Charlie actually talked to her.

“Of course, he told me about you yesterday dear follow me.” You set down your coffee before being given the grand tour. After a minute you’re back at the front being directed on your daily duties. Most of which is pretending to look busy, Helen prefers solitaire on her computer to get her through the day. On the other hand, you brought a book that remains hidden behind the ancient monitor in front of you. 

You thought about bringing Charlie his coffee but his office lights are off and his doors are locked so he must be out patrolling already. Within 45 minutes you’re given your first task of making more coffee, while the water pours out you see Charlie step into the break room. His eyes look surprised to see you but his face doesn't change, he peers around you toward the coffee maker before he can ask you to tell him. 

“I bought you coffee on the way in, it is at the front desk.” You quickly leave the break room to get it before he can react. On your way back you inform him, “Black, no sugar, no cream.”

“Thank you.” As he takes the cup your hands brush his, and he can feel the increased beating of his heart. It’s the most contact he’s had with a woman. He likes it. Your bright smile gives him that butterfly feeling he hears Bella talk about with her friend.

“No thank you, Sher- Charlie I appreciate the opportunity.” He waves off your thanks as if he does stuff like this all the time. 

“You adjusting OK?” He finds he wants to keep conversation with you despite his nature. You may be surprised but you don’t show it, enjoying this interaction.

“Yes, Helen is nice and I get to just pretend to work all day.” You bump your hip against him before you can think better of it.

Charlie surprises you with a deep chuckle, It’s not a full-blown laugh but it’s more than enough. It’s no secret that Charlie is one of the more attractive men in Forks, but you didn’t think of him like that until now. Not many men could pull off the 70s pornstache, or his grumpy attitude without being a complete ass. Your thoughts are interrupted by Charlie leaning down to speak quietly to you.

“Well let me know if you need more books to keep you busy Bella’s got tons of those romance ones.” He rolls his eyes playfully and nods his head before heading to his office. 

In the wake of his leave, you revel in the way his deep voice felt so close to your ear. However, you don’t dwell on his actions too much because there is no way he was flirting with you. Making your way back to the front desk you see Helen packing up to leave, she informs you she’s taking lunch. 

Charlie lets out an exasperated sigh at the stack of paperwork waiting for him when he unlocks his office. The coffee you brought him goes straight down like a shot, he appreciates the fact that you knew he wouldn’t like the extra bullshit. Throughout his shift, he sneaks peeks at you. He pauses when he sees you talking on the phone, telling himself he’s only checking to make sure you don’t need help. But the way your lips move has him in a trance, he snaps out of it before you can catch him. 

Even though he spent a fair amount of time staring at you he managed to complete over half of his paperwork. He’s overdue for a break and he knows you could use one since you never took a lunch.  

You have been manning the phones even after Helen came back, you know you should’ve taken your 1-hour lunch but you were in a groove. At least until Charlie strolled up beside you to see what you were doing. You could smell Irish Spring wafting off of him with a hint of laundry detergent. 

“You busy?” It was a loaded question on his part but he didn't want to just command you to come with him. 

“Not for the Chief.” You turn your body towards him to prove your words, and in return the corner of his mouth lifts almost like a smile.

“Lunch on me then?” He asks you with his hands balled in his pockets.

“I’ll never turn down a free lunch.” You turn to Helen to check that she’ll be okay, and she gives you a wink nodding her head toward the chief telling you to ‘have fun’. You raise our eyebrows at the implication.

On the way out Charlie gets the door, and his veiny forearm peeks out from his uniform. You wouldn’t say you have a thing for hairy guys but yet again Charlie somehow makes it work. Luckily you could blame the frigid breeze for your flustered expression. You follow his lead to the cruiser and he opens your door for you again. Your bashful expression after thanking him goes straight to his lower stomach, it’s been a while since a woman looked at him so fervently. 

Once he’s in the cruiser a comfortable silence fills the air, and you think of all the things you could bring up with him later in the diner. So far all you’ve come up with are sports and books but honestly, that should be more than enough for Charlie. Orange leaves take up most of the ground, a warning for the upcoming months. The diner is the same as always when you pull up, you open the door before Charlie can hustle his way to where you are. The stern look he gives you only makes your sudden attraction to him worse. 

The bell above the door alerts Cora to your presence. Charlie saddles up right behind you urging you forward with his hand on your middle back. Walking past the patrons, you can feel the questioning stares. But you’re sure Charlie won’t pay them any mind so neither do you. At the booth, Charlie gestures for you to slide in first.

Cora turns to you for your order since she already knows Charlie’s by heart.

“I’ll do a burger and fries with a sprite please.” You smile at Cora as she takes down your order. 

“So,” You turn to Charlie, “What’s been going on in the sports world?” 

Charlie’s side glance is enough to make you laugh. “Steelers are cleaning up, they have a path to the Super Bowl.” He didn’t mean to look at you crazy but it was the first time in a while someone was genuinely interested in his interests. The flutters in his stomach make another appearance. 

“My dad’s a cowboy fan so it’s the same thing every year.” Charlie snorts at that. 

The sound of plates landing in front of you ends your and Charlie’s moment. Looking up your eyes meet Cora’s and you thank her before she leaves again. You and Charlie waste no time digging into your food. With all of your fries and most of your burger gone you throw in the towel, leaning back against the booth.

“You gonna eat that?” Charlie eyes the rest of your burger.

“No, you can have it.” After your acceptance, he finishes it in one quick bite. You wish you didn't find that attractive.

……….

After your first lunch together many were shared, Charlie would always schedule his break around yours to make sure you ate. He also wanted to spend time with you when the opportunity would lend itself. The feeling was mutual, you put in more effort with your work outfits and make-up. Every morning you would stop to get Charlie coffee on the way in, and Helen would always give you sly smiles. You figured she picked up on the undertones of your and Charlie’s interactions, but unlike most people, she kept it to herself.

That didn’t stop others from probing you about your “Diner Dates” with the Chief. When you were collecting produce a few older women came up to you under the guise of concern. They told you getting with a man that age wouldn’t be good for any girl your age, while it was good advice you know it wasn’t given with good intentions. Instead, you pretend to not know what they are talking about effectively outing their ill-informed gossip. Charlie also hadn’t shown any initiative to ask you out on an actual date so you’re unsure where the fuel is coming from. 

The next day at work you decide to pull back seeing as the entire town somehow thinks you both are dating. You took your lunch before Helen, the words of the older ladies on replay in your head. Sure it was the wrong messenger but it was the right message you don’t know what you were thinking. 

It didn’t last a day, Charlie came by the desk deliberately when Helen took her lunch. 

“Hey there’s some discrepancies with the evidence log of Riley’s stuff, can you help me sort through it.” Though he posed it as a question he began to walk toward his office immediately. 

Once you’re in the office he shuts the door behind you before he moves to stand in front of his desk.

“I just uh wanted to check that everything was alright,” He clears his throat before continuing, “That you feel comfortable or if there’s something I’ve done.” After he finishes your face morphs to shock.

“No of course not, I just know there’s been some gossip around town about us dating and figured I’d have lunch by myself.” Charlie’s eyebrows furrow at your admission.

“I haven’t heard anything did someone say something to you?” His voice drops at the thought of anyone badgering you about this. 

“It’s not a big deal, and I didn’t want you to feel uncomfo-” He cuts you off with a deadpan stare. 

“Why would I be uncomfortable with people thinking a woman out of my league is dating me?” His definitive words leave you stunned. “It is a big deal, do you remember who it was?”

“No it’s fine Charlie really,” You try to convince him.

“It’s not if means you don’t go to lunch with me.” He gripes.

“I didn’t realize you enjoyed my company that much.” You stare at him until he returns your gaze.

“Well I do.” He assures you.

The both of you stand in front of each other in silence, the smile grows bigger on your face at Charlie’s confession. 

“Does this mean you want to go on a date with me?” You inch your way closer to him, gently tugging his tie. 

“Of course I do, I was working my way up to it.” He swallows hard when he feels you get even closer to him. 

“Yeah?” Your eyes never stray from his as your smile widens. Charlie’s eyes fall to your lips just as quickly as he looks away. You grab his hands placing them on your waist before bringing your lips to his ear. “How about now?” 

Charlie’s hands firmly grip your waist when he feels your warm breath tickle his ear. His pants grow tighter when your perfume invades his nostrils. When you reer back to look at him he wastes no time planting his lips on yours. His mustache tickles underneath your nose but you respond back with the same fervor. You tilt your head to the side to deepen the kiss, Charlie groans at your eagerness. 

Your hands slide up his chest and wrap around his neck to play with the hair on the back of his neck. When his tongue licks your bottom lip you eagerly open your mouth to him, pressing your chest against his. Charlie lets his hands dip to cup your ass through the jeans you’re wearing, earning himself a pretty moan from you. The way his tongue licks into your mouth gives you ideas of what else he would be good at. 

But all good things come to an end, and a knock at the door sends you two flying apart. You immediately focus on fixing yourself so it doesn’t look like you were in a make-out session with your boss. A folder catches your eye and you pick it up hoping to look busy. Helen peeks her head in to let Charlie know Bella is getting dropped off by Edward. Charlie’s eyes roll to the back of his head at the mention of his daughter’s boyfriend, you can’t stop the giggle that pours out of you. 

Helen slips back out and Charlie walks over to the far corner you’ve placed yourself in. “It’s a little backward now but would you let me take you out on a proper date?” 

“I’ll have to check my schedule.” You smile up at him knowing he knows you’re joking.

“How does Saturday at 7 sound?” He bends down to your ear before continuing, “I know a nice Italian place in Port Angeles.” When he pulls back he is glad to see the bashful expression on your face. He’s still got it. 

“It sounds great Charlie.” You get on your tip toes to peck him on the cheek before exiting his office. 

On the way to your desk, you see Edward and Bella sitting in the waiting chairs talking. As you sit down you see Bella’s head snap in your direction, her and Edward's conversation halting. You pretend to do work as usual until Charlie comes out to greet Bella and grunt in Ed’s direction. 

[djarins-cyare]

So it’s been a year…

One year since Disney released episode 1 season 3 of The Mandalorian

One year since I published chapter 1 of Be-All And Endor

I don’t really remember much of the first 20 weeks of that year, just that it was a flurry of proofreading and finalising and uploading (the hard parts) and comment reading and new friend making and massively appreciating (the wonderful parts).

Proofing and publishing 2 chapters a week with average lengths of around 10k words was exhausting. But for the first 8 of those weeks I had Din Djarin on the screen (intermittently *ahem* but this isn’t a post about the quality of s3) and for the rest of the year I had my readers leaving comments and sending messages, and it was… overwhelmingly the best year of my life.

I mean that. The best year. Ever. Because of you. Any of you, all of you, if you’ve ever even just clicked on my fic and given it chance, you’ve raised the hits on it. Even seeing that metric tick up has made me so thankful.

Because I didn’t think I could write. I always wanted to be an author but never believed in myself.

I did an English degree with writing in mind, but told myself nobody ever does anything with an English degree. I took creative writing modules, and when the published author who ran the class gave me scathing feedback, my dream fully died. I got an okay grade, hardly anything to be proud of, and I graduated and went to work in another industry.

I suffered from clinical depression.

One day many years later, I found a favourite author online and messaged him to ask when his fourth novel in a series was being published, and (emboldened by the anonymity of being online) cheekily offered to proofread it for him. Except he took me seriously and sent me the prologue to see what I could do. Like, for a real book you can buy on Amazon. After feeling sick for two whole days I went all Autistic Obsession on it and sent him back the most thoroughly proofed bit of writing anyone had ever seen. And I got the job. (I say ‘job’, I’d volunteered for free in exchange for the privilege of reading it in advance, so I can only ever call it semi-professional since I didn’t earn from it).

This, amongst other things, lifted me from my depression. I came off the pills and felt happier, more creative. Once the proofing was completed, the author encouraged me to write my own stuff, but whilst I’d gained some confidence… my brain was empty. I had no clamouring stories to get down on the page, no gems ready to polish.

Then in summer 2021, a friend sat me down and showed me the first 3 episodes of the Mandalorian. And my brain chemistry was instantly altered. I binge-watched the first two seasons, by the end of which I was unequivocally in love with Din Djarin, and then I binge-watched them again.

Around that time, I moved to a different country. Well, Wales is still the UK, but it’s a different country to England, and I was now 170 miles away from my friends. I went because as a single woman on a middling salary, London is too expensive to live in and having rid myself of an overbearing long term relationship, I was NOT keen to get into another one just to pay the bills. The pandemic meant I could work remotely, so I upped sticks and moved to Cardiff, resolving to visit my office in London (and my friends) once a month. It’s 2 hours by train, totally doable.

So what to do with all the spare time I suddenly had?

By Easter 2022 I’d started writing. 9 months later (yes, it’s my actual baby), Be-All And Endor was complete and I began publishing alongside season 3’s release.

Now… it has over 62.k views and 1.2k kudos 🥹🤯

Did I think it would be this popular? No way. I can’t even believe it now. I still see SO much wrong with it, which is why I’m still proofreading and editing it.

A professional proofread/edit takes a long time, and if you’re wondering what I’m doing to it, it involves the following:

Checking for things like clichés, non-inclusive language

Checking all adverbs to see if a better word can be used (e.g. ‘bellows’ instead of ‘shouts loudly’… adverbs usually end in -ly and it’s not good to overuse them)

Rephrasing any passive sentences (simply put: ‘the ship is flown by Din’ is passive; ‘Din flies the ship’ is active)

Reducing average sentence length (shorter sentences are easier to read)

Going through every single damn polysyllabic word (e.g. anything that has more than 3-syllables) and seeing if a shorter synonym can be found (this helps the rhythm, as too many long words slows things down and can make readers stumble… and I use them a lot 😖)

Checking the 50 most frequently used words and seeing if I can find synonyms for those (helps give more variety in the language)

Ensuring Din’s name isn’t overused or underused, and adding epithets (e.g. ‘the hunter’ or ‘your Mandalorian’) where it’s overused but it’s too confusing to just say ‘he’/‘him’

These are the big things, but there’s more too - I’m streamlining decisions I made to use certain phrasings throughout; tweaking Din’s word choice here and there to ensure his voice is captured the best way possible; revamping some of the photos. And with all the tiny tweaks, it’s slowly padding things out too… when publishing was done it was 393k, now it’s 403k, although it’s not extra content as such, just better described.

I’m up to chapter 13 so far, and I’ll probably be doing this for another 2 years to get through all 40, because (a) I want to write other things too so that slows down the proofing, and (b) I so badly want to be proud of this project… everyone’s telling me I should be, and I am in a way… but it’s more gratitude to others than pride in myself… and I feel like if I get this proofing done and finally have a story I’m truly happy with, I can at last let myself be proud of what I achieved here.

I confess, I’m so envious of those who can post something without obsessing over it. I know it’s a facet of my autism, and I’ve long since accepted that my neurodivergent brain will not let me be cool about things other people are cool about. If I’ve learned anything, it’s that I should turn it to my advantage, so okay… I’m gonna make this fic the same quality as a published book on your bookshelf. And meanwhile I’m gonna enjoy and love all the fics that people can write and publish with far greater speed than I can, because the greatest thing about this fandom is that every contribution is worthy of appreciation, no matter the author’s experience or writing method. Quality fic isn’t synonymous with proofreading, and I hope it’s clear that I’m describing my obsession with perfecting my own writing, not other people’s. I’ve read so many amazing authors on here, and I want them all to know how much I love their work (any recs are from the bottom of my heart).

So anyway, this long and rambling post has turned into something unintended… I guess you now have some insight into my mind and the origins of Be-All And Endor and the future of it. Not what I meant to do, but I’ll leave it in for context.

Because the real reason I started writing this diatribe was because I wanted to express my true and undying gratitude to everyone who has ever read, commented, or left kudos on my fic over on AO3, and/or messaged me, followed me, interacted with me, or reblogged my masterlist here on tumblr 🧡💚

I know I am insanely lucky to have received the level of support I have, and I don’t take that for granted at all. I want to give back to this fandom, and I love reading and reccing other people’s fics, meeting new moots, and hopefully soon I’ll be publishing new fics for you all to read too. Fresh material is percolating, so it won’t be too long now.

So thank you to everyone who reads this post, you’re the absolute best and I love you more than I have the vocabulary to describe. Please accept a grateful forehead kiss instead 💋

[joongwooclub]

fated || j. yh.

pairing: fem!reader x jeong yunho

tags/warnings: childhood friends to strangers to friends to lovers, fluff, smut near end, dilf yunho, yunho’s child likes fem!reader a lot. [aged up reader and yunho]

word count: 6.0K

✩: authors note - this was a quick (not to quick) brainrot, so please know this may contain grammar inaccuracies + misspells and I haven't had time to revise due to university.

✩: reblogs / comments + feedbacks are appreciated!! story under cut!

Jeong Yunho has been my best friend since childhood, we went through every single small and big situation I can imagine. I didn’t know when it happened but I had feelings for him. Maybe it was his golden retriever personality, or his tall body portion with his long delicate fingers that caressed your face. Shaking my head to get the perverted thoughts away from my mind, I looked at the boy next to me. His side profile was perfect as always as he laughed at a comment a fellow classmate said. It was a late Friday night, sitting in the bar with a small group of friends from my last year classes. It was bizarre to think that it was the last year of college and after this, everyone will be on their way to their own life. “Yunho-ah, what will you be doing after finishing the last year?” Mina asked, her eyes fluttering in a way to send flirtatious signals. Yunho gave her a smile, and it made my stomach turn. Was I jealous? Very much, but I couldn’t do anything since Yunho wasn’t my boyfriend. Just a crush. “Well hopefully I’ll level up soon at my workplace, I want to do business once I finish here.” He answered, a hand on his lap as his legs were crossed, like a true gentleman, I bit my lip as the group spoke. 

My energy slowly runs out to communicate. Yunho glanced over at me and rubbed my arm softly, “Hey..you tired?” I nodded slowly, “Let’s go back home?” He whispers, my cheeks grew with blush as he was so attentive to my energy, but as well as he said ‘home’ like we lived together. I nodded and got up, “It’s getting late so me and y/n will be heading back. You guys stay safe.” Yunho smiled before handing some money to another friend to pay for his and my drink. “Yuyu, I can pay for my own drink.” I pouted. He just poked my cheek and shook his head, “nope~ I got it.” He didn’t even let me finish my new sentence as he took my hand and walked me out of the bar. Luckily we didn’t drive, so we were able to just grab a taxi and even more luckily, we lived a few blocks from each other. As the taxi took us back to my house, I looked out of the window, the night view flew by. I sighed, Yunho looked over at me. “What’s up sweetheart?” he questioned, I looked at him and smiled softly, “Just wondering how we would be once we graduate.” I spoke softly. Yunho awed and took my hand into his, his warmth warming my cold hands, “Well, we will have each other no matter what.” “promise?” “promise.”

[ 4  years later ]

That night with Yunho felt like it was a day ago. The promise of staying together soon broke as graduation happened and life became busy. Last thing I knew was that Yunho was now a CEO of a business, while I currently work at a small (not so quiet) preschool as a teacher. All those years for a teaching degree and I still landed a job to work with small kids. Could it be the baby fever? Maybe, but the thought of one day having a family was nice, but definitely not now. I mean, I am only 25 years old, almost 26 now. It was normal to think about family now since it was my mid-20’s but, no one ever caught my eye–not since yunho at least. “Ms. Y/L/N~” A small child called my last name, I turned around and smiled as my eyes landed on one of my favorite students, “Hi nina~ how are you.” I cooed softly crouching down to be eye level with her. Her brown eyes shined brightly as she was a naturally giggly, happy child. “Ma dada ist picking me..” she said. I tilted my head smiling at her, knowing she was still young so developing her speaking skills was something we wanted to work on. “Your daddy is what sweetheart?” I asked. “Picking me..um..up! Like sky!”  she said excitedly. “Oh, picking you up! How nice~ what about mama?” I asked. “Mama don’t live with us. She went away.” she spoke naturally. I was shocked. I knew her mother, she wasn’t the best but she was trying as a young mom, around my age, so I didn’t have the right to judge. As Nina said that, she went back to playing with the other kids outside, the giggling and lively screaming of the kids echoing through the small playground. I stood up and started to clean up around the table area, glancing at the clock outside and notice the time they were about to be picked up. As soon as the clock hit 5pm, our alarm to come inside rang. Some kids ran inside, while others put away their toys from the playground back into the outside box and went inside. I gave them small smiles as we helped put on their shoes if they couldn’t do it themselves. One by one each parent came to pick up their child. Nina waited in the corner, tippy toeing to look out the small child level window. I cleaned up the remaining trash and watched for every parent and child that left. 

Almost a full 30 minutes went by and Nina was still here. “Nina sweetheart, where’s daddy?” I asked, sitting down next to her crisscrossed. “Works late…he come..” Nina mumbles sadly. Her head tilted down and I saw her fumble with her hands, I bit my lip, feeling sorry, Nina’s mom was always a few minutes late, but not like this. So I took her tiny hands into mine and gave her a smile. “How about we play princesses?” I suggested. “Yay!! Princesses!! Will you be princess too?” I giggled at her half full sentences; I nodded and she smiled ear to ear. I rumbled through the toy box near us and pulled out some dolls. Nina finally sat down across from me and started playing, immediately forgetting about her late father. It was some minutes after when the door opened. Nina looked up and gleamed with happiness as she rushed to get up and run to whoever came in. I stood up and patted down my work jeans and looked at the figure. He had black hair, broad shoulders, he was clearly tall despite the fact he was bending down to kiss his daughters forehead. The obvious sweating told me that he rushed here as quickly as he could. “I’m terribly sorry for being late, please forgiv-..y/n?” his sentence stopped and I stared back. “Yunho?” I was shocked. His eyes turned from shock to the smile he gave in college, “daddy you know ms. Y/L/N?” Nina asked, looking between us. “Yes baby, we went to school together.” Yunho smiled, squatting down to his daughter. “HOW?! You look old, she’s pretty!!” Nina screeched. I held back my giggle as she said, “Nina sweetheart, don’t call your dad old.” I chuckled. 

Yunho laughed and patted his daughter’s head, “come on baby, let’s go home.” He stood up and held Nina’s hand. He gave me a sweet smile, “I really am sorry that I’m late. Even though I’m a boss at my own company, it’s so much harder to leave. Was she okay?” Yunho asked, I nodded. “Of course, Nina is one of my favorite students.” I smiled, walking back to the dolls on the ground to put them away, “Nina told me about her mother not being able to pick her up anymore?” I mentioned. Yunho’s face turned pale, “y-yeah..c-can we talk about it outside?” He asked. I simply nodded and made sure everything was cleaned, grabbed my tote bag, and keys to lock the door, turning off the lights before closing the door behind me. Yunho parked his car right on the driveway of the preschool and lifted Nina into the backseat, putting on her seatbelt, before telling her “daddy needs to talk real quick ok? Listen to music.” as he turned on a seat tv and Elsa's Frozen started playing. As he closed the door, making sure to lower the windows a bit for air to circulate, he looked at me. “She listens to frozen loudly. So we can talk normally.” he said, and he was correct as I heard Nina sing very loudly to the song, mumbling at parts she couldn't understand. “No worries. I only mentioned cause she told me, but for file reason, I have to add you. Will she be coming back soon?” I said looking at him fondly. Yunho shook his head in a no motion, “I want to say unfortunately no, but I’m happy. We filed for a divorced a while ago because she told me she found someone better and the guy treated her better..whatever that meant. I just got full custody over Nina. You can remove Kyomi Cheng and add Yunho Jeong instead.” He explained. I made a mental note about the info, “Alright, thank you. I will make sure to update the files tomorrow morning.” Some silence filled the air before I made a comment. “Still can’t believe you’re here.” I chuckled. He smiled and nodded, “yeah, can’t believe we live in the same city even though we went to school somewhere else. Do you live around here?” “I do. A few blocked in Willow Crossing.” Yunho’s eyes opened in shock, “No way! I live in Fairview Estates!” I was equally shocked. Fairview Estates were the more expensive places, but it was really close to where I lived. “Wow, fate really has us.” “yeah..” I gave him a smile and hugged him, which shocked him again but his gentle arms hugged me back. “Well get home safely, I’ll see Nina tomorrow.” “First thing in the morning.” Yunho smiled. I waved bye to Nina who smiled and waved goodbye back and walked to my car. My heart was racing like a teenage girl again, seeing Yunho like that was like college. He still looked the same, except his face got sharper, he grew muscles, he was taller, and god, he smelled so good in the hug. His cologne clogged my mine, it smelled like Ferrari Light. I shook my head, I can’t believe I’m falling in love with him again just by seeing him. I focused on my way home, stopping by the store to pick up food for dinner and went home. The long day finally tiring my body as soon as I sat down to eat. My phone buzzed and I glanced at the time. 7:50 pm, I furrowed my eyebrows as I usually never have messages or calls at this time. 

Unknown Number, 7:51 pm : HIIIII MS. Y/L/N

Unknown Number, 7:51 pm: I’m sorry y/n. Nina took my phone after I said I still had your number. Just wanted to say thank you for watching her. Would you like coffee tomorrow morning?

I smiled at my phone, even as a single dad now, Yunho was still the same. Caring and selflessness. I picked up my phone and typed back.

Me, 7:53 pm : Would love coffee!

Yuyu, 7:54 pm: Caramel Macchiato like the old days, right? :) 

I blushed as he remembered my order even though it was years ago since we last saw each other. I texted back and smiled. 

Me, 7:55 pm: wow, still remembered =D, anyways get Nina to sleep. I’ll see you tomorrow. Goodnight Yunho!

Yuyu, 7:55 pm: No Yuyu? :( 

Me, 7:56 pm: okay, goodnight yuyu~

Yuyu, 7:56 pm: :D Goodnight doll (still your favorite nickname right?) Nina says goodnight as well. See you tomorrow.

I felt my cheeks fill with blush as he used a nickname (more of a pet name) I haven’t heard in a while. The way he used to say it in college always made me weak in the knees. It was honestly pathetic of me for feeling like this from just one moment with him. I sighed and put my phone on my night stand, the only light was coming from my lamp. I wonder how Yunho acted now since he has a little girl, does he tuck her in at night? Cuddle her as she falls asleep? Maybe he uses his puppy-like pout to get his little girl to giggle when she’s upset. ‘Why am I thinking like this?’ I mumbled to myself. Reaching over and turning off my lamp to try and sleep. ‘Let’s hope I can function in the morning’

The loud beeping from my alarm blared through my silent bedroom. I groaned and pressed stop, lazily getting out of bed. I looked at my phone, going to the weather app to see what the weather was like for today. The temperature was starting to get colder, and those weathers are what I liked the most. I got up and went to my closet to grab a beige turtleneck, topping it with a loose sweater to hang, wearing some simple leggings. After getting ready and adding small accessories, I quickly grabbed my bag and keys to drive to the school. It wasn’t a bad drive today, the crunchy leaves making me smile brightly as I walked towards the door. Setting up the classroom was easy and I finished quite quickly as the kids wouldn’t be there for another hour or so. So I sat down onto my chair in my corner and typed away on my computer, until I received a message. 

Yuyu, 9:20 am: Good Morning :D, Nina has something waiting for you at the door!

I giggled and put my phone down to walk to the door to open it. I see Nina holding a Starbucks sandwich bag and holding my drink. “WE GOT THIS FOR YOU!” Nina giggled, I bent down to her level and smiled brightly. “Thank you Nina~ Would you like to go put it on my desk?” I asked, she nodded happily and ran inside, taking her shoes off first, before running to my desk corner. “She’s so energetic for the morning.” I looked up and saw Yunho smiling down at me. He held out his hand and helped me stand up, he was in a black suit, white button up on the inside, with shiny slick black shoes. He had two silver rings on, and his married finger was bare. I wanted to smile at the thought of him being single, but that’s just rude for someone who just got cheated on and divorced. I snapped out of my daydreaming and spoke, “Nina is an energizer. Just like her father.”, my comment made Yunho smile and chuckle deeply. “I’m glad. It’s okay for her to be here early right?” he asked, concerned. “Of course. Me and her can play princesses-” “DADDYYY~” Nina interrupted what I was saying, Yunho apologized and looked at his daughter. “Yes baby?” “Come in and play.” Nina pouted. Yunho looked at me, as if he was asking if it was okay for him to stay for a bit, “come in come in.” I motioned him, closing the door behind us, hearing the alarmed door lock for safety reasons. I watched as Yunho looked around the classroom, his tall figure could touch the ceiling if he was any taller. I sat down on the carpet with Nina as she played around with blocks 

Yunho sat down next to me and watched his daughter ramble and play around. He sighed, but not a negative sigh, more of a relaxed one. “You’ve changed.” “hm?” I hummed, turning to look at him. His eyes connected with mine and I felt my heart flutter. “From college. You used to hate looking after kids and such..now you’re a teacher, being surrounded by little kids all day.” he chuckles. I blushed and focused back on Nina, “yeah..well.. You know, people change.” I said as I was quite embarrassed because I started liking the idea of kids when I imagined me and Yunho having one. “You would be a good mom.” Yunho commented while watching Nina. I could have choked on water if I had any in my mouth, “w-what makes you say that?” I stumbled. “I just know it. I mean we grew up with each other, plus you’re so caring and protective of kids, even if you personally don’t think so.” Before I could reply, Nina walked up to us and handed us some dolls. “I’m princess! You and daddy can be king and queen.” she smiled innocently. I looked at Nina big eyed and mouth a gap, this must have caught Yunho off guard too because his ears started to turn to a shade of red and he coughed awkwardly. “Nina sweetie, you can’t say things like that.” Nina pouted and whined, “it’s okay Yuyu.” I whispered, getting up I walked to my desk and picked up the coffee. “Thanks by the way.” I blushed, shaking the drink lightly, “ah, no problem.” Yunho smiled awkwardly, rubbing the back of his neck, he stood up awkwardly and cleared his throat. “Okay well, thank you for the fun morning, I have to head to work now. Nina be good, take care y/n, I’ll be on time, this time, I swear.” He says, “Don’t keep promises you can’t keep.” I joked. He just laughed and nodded, “see you later.” He smiles, before heading out the door, the door closing slowly closing behind him, I watched as his broad shoulders slowly went out of view. 

The day at the school went by fast. The kids were now taking their scheduled nap time, I made sure each kid was comfortable and tucked in before going back to my desk. I silently typed away on my computer, creating plans for the next few classes. I felt my eyes close slightly from the calm, tired atmosphere. I drank my water to stay awake and continued with my tasks, and before I knew it, the school day ended. Every kid greeted their parents, I waved goodbye to each kid with a smile, “see everyone on monday!” I cheered. Looking around the classroom, Nina sat patiently on the waiting stools. “Come on Nina, let’s go outside.” I said, she smiled and happily hopped off the small stool and ran to me, taking my hands into her small ones. I turned off the lights and made sure to have everything before locking the door. “Daddy isn’t here yet.” Nina pouted. I pat her head, “I know sweetheart. He can be late again. How about we sit out here and play a game?” I said. “What game?”  She gleamed, I hummed, thinking of a small game that could still be stimulating for her, “how about I spy?” “how do we play..” she tilted her head. God, she was so cute, just like a smaller version of Yunho. I chuckled and sat her down on a step, while I sat down next to her. “If I say I spy..I will give a hint on what I'm looking at and you guess.” I said, Nina nodded softly like she semi understood. So I started the game, “I spy something with green.” Nina looked around, “..hm..tree?” she asked looking at me with a nervous look. I nodded and cheered, “yes that’s correct! Great job Nina~” I smiled, making Nina happy. We played like that until Yunho appeared a few minutes later, he got out of his car and opened his arms as soon as he saw Nina run to him. “Thank you.” he says and I smiled back. “No worries. I think Nina enjoys her time with me, right Nina?” “Yes~~ You’re the best!” she cheered as Yunho put her into her car seat. “I think I owe you dinner for always watching my daughter.” Yunho laughed while closing the door. “I’ll take that offer one day.” I said lightly, grabbing my keys out, actually parking closer to the school this time. “Get home safely Mr. Jeong.” I waved bye, Yunho bit his lip before saying bye back and getting into his car. 

Multiple weeks passed, and weeks turned into months. It turned to a routine of Nina getting to the school early with my Starbucks order in her tiny hands as Yunho looked at her fondly. Each conversation with him became close again, just like old times. Sometimes I would think he would blush, but I always turned down that thought. We were only friends and that’s it. For this particular day, school was on break and I didn’t have a lot planned since I was far from family, and I rarely went out so hanging out with friends wasn’t an option. Somehow Nina heard that from a conversation with a coworker, and here I am in front of Yunho’s and Nina’s house. The house was actually quite big, it looked like two stories, the front yard was covered in light snow, decorated with cute Christmas decorations for the upcoming holiday. I rang the doorbell, feeling the cold getting to me despite wearing a warm thin sweater with an oversize hoodie with some warm leggings with beige fur boots. Yunho opened the door and smiled brightly, “Welcome y/n.” he greeted, allowing me inside. I walked in and was hit with the warm air and the smell of hot chocolate in the air. Nina wanted to make hot chocolate with marshmallows, she was dying for you to try it.” Yunho said, his hand accidentally brushing against mine as he was walking past. I blushed and softly nodded, “if you get too hot, you can leave your hoodie on the rack.” he says before rushing back to what I would assume is the kitchen. I walked in that direction as well and was in awe. The kitchen fridge had drawings by Nina pinned to it, with small photos of Yunho with his family and friends. One photo made me smile and blush. It was an old photo of us from college, his arm was wrapped around my shoulder, we were both gleaming with bright smiles on our face, the party strings and confetti stuck in our hairs. “We grew up so much huh.” Yunho commented, seeing me look at the picture. “Yeah, it’s unbelievable.” I said looking at him. I don’t know why it was still awkward between us. It could be me..I don’t know how to stop thinking about him. He clouded my thoughts 24/7 and I couldn’t get him out of my head. “Let’s go sit down.”

A few hours passed, mainly filled with movies and laughter from Nina as I watched Yunho play with her during slow scenes of the movies. It was nice to see him like this, I wonder why his ex would cheat and say she found someone better. He was a busy man, but he always tried to make up for his time by spending extra time with his daughter and cooking and playing with her. “Can I call y/n mommy now?” Nina asked innocently. That comment made me snap out of my thoughts. Yunho stopped giggling and sat up straight. He furrowed his eyebrows. “Why do you say that Nina?” He asked seriously. “Because she reminds me of mommy, but better.” Nina said, pouting. I just got up from the couch, “sorry Nina, but I have to go.” I said, patting her head softly before rushing to the door. I heard Yunho telling Nina to stay where she was and I heard heavy footsteps behind me. I reached the door and opened it quickly, rushing outside, only for my wrist to be caught by the person I didn’t want to look at. “y/n? What’s the matter?” “Nothing Yunho, I just have to go.” I said deadpan, I wanted to cry, tell him I loved him, but how can I without ruining our built friendship again? Yunho’s grip tightened around my wrist then I felt his other hand spin me around, forcing me to look at his chest. “Look at me,” he said sternly. I never heard this tone from him besides the times I would cry into his chest about my pathetic, toxic ex boyfriends. I was shaking slightly, maybe from the cold, or the fear of looking Yunho in the eyes. With the little courage I had, I looked him directly in the eyes, I watched his eyes soften, “Why are you trying to leave-” I cut him off, tears were in my eyes, “Yunho, please let go of me. I need to go. I can’t stay here, I’m sorry. I love Nina, but what she said... I can’t handle it. I can’t handle it because you will never see me like that.” I started, getting out of his grip, backing away slowly. “I loved you Yunho, I actually still love you. Since we were kids, but you will never see me like that, and I don’t want Nina to think I’ll be her new mom when we aren’t anything.” I continued. I didn’t even want to wait for a response, I just rushed to my car, starting it and leaving before Yunho could stop my car. I knew he didn’t love me back…but how wrong I was. 

Days went by, then it was weeks. I called my assistant to tell them I got sick and wouldn’t be in for a while, I ignored every text and call that came from Yunho. I really only responded when I knew it was Nina texting from her speech pattern and little kid spelling. I couldn't face him, not after what I said. Was I being childish? Sure, but feelings make you feel like that. I want to hold him, hug him, have him tell me it’s okay, but he’s not mine, and he would never be. I wiped my tears with my tissues as I sat on my sofa with an oversize t-shirt and shorts, used tissues filled with tears and snot covered the table as a twilight movie played in the background. Way to go y/n, a grown adult crying over a problem I made myself because I couldn’t control my emotions. The movie was loudly playing until my doorbell started to ring louder than the tv, I sniffed and paused my movie. I silently groaned, not wanting to open the door. I was going to ignore it, but remembered I was sad enough to deliver food and thought it could be my poor uber eats driver holding my two pizza boxes and cake desserts with extra whip cream. I got up and wiped my face to avoid being asked if I was okay. I didn’t bother looking at my peep hole, what a mistake. As I opened my door, Yunho stood there. He was wearing a simple black tee and gray sweatpants with gray jordans. I wanted to close my door, but he caught it. “y/n..please. Let’s talk.” He says, his voice soft enough that it made me want to cry. I didn’t have the energy to try and kick him out so I just moved away from the door and stepped back. “I just want to talk about the last time I saw- are you crying?” Yunho began before seeing my bloodshot eyes, I turned around not being able to face him. “N-No I’m not.” I said trying my best not to sniffle. Yunho sighed and walked in completely, closing the door behind him. I didn’t want to look at him, until I felt his arms wrap around my body, his hands automatically wrapping around the waist. His warm body heat transferred to me and I wanted to cry even more. He slowly turned me around and gently placed my head against his chest. “You can cry..it’s okay.” he whispers. I cried into his chest, tears kept falling, and Yunho just held me in the middle of my home. I probably spent half an hour just crying into his chest. It was like the old times, and my heart ached. Yunho’s shirt was soaked by the time I slowly got out of his warm hug, despite it being a black shirt, it was noticeable I was crying into it. “I’m sorry Yunho..I’m sorry..” I began to apologize. Yunho just looked at me sadly and gave me a small supportive smile, “y/n love, it’s okay..” he whispers. My head started to ache in pain as the crying took a lot out of me, I groaned softly and put my head against my forehead. “How about you go upstairs to your room? I’ll bring you medicine.” Yunho offered. “What? No I’m okay-” “Stop lying to me please. Just go lie down. I’ll figure out where your room is later.” Yunho said sternly. Not having the energy to argue, I just simply nodded, before heading up I mumbled, “my room is the one on the right at the very end.” before walking up the stairs.

As I laid down on my bed, my head began to hurt even more, Yunho came into my room a few minutes later with a glass full of water, and some head ache medication. He set the stuff down on my night stand, and glanced around my room. My sanrio stuff animals on one side of my bed, and some small posters of music and photos of trips. He chuckles, like seeing my room matched me perfectly. “What?” I mumbled, blush growing onto my cheeks. “Nothing..nothing. Your room just fits you that’s all.” He smiled, sitting on the edge of my bed. I didn’t say anything, too scared to speak to him now that he was in my room. I basically confessed and now I have to deal with the rejection. I reached over and took the medication pills and gulp down the water before laying back in bed. “So..can you just reject me, so we can move on..” “reject you? Why would I reject you?” I frowned at his answer, did he enjoy my pain? “You came here to say I’m sorry, I’m not interested right? So go on and reject me!” I said loudly, ignoring the thumping pain in my head. Yunho just shook his head, “You’re unbelievable.” “what?” I took offense to his comment. He stretched over to the point he was hovering over me, I could feel his warm breath on my face to my neck. His long body completely covering me. “You never even let me answer you that day.” He mumbles, “Because I know-” “No you don’t y/n. Listen to me y/n, I love you as well. I always been so scared to hurt our friendship, and when we graduated. Fuck, I regretted not telling you. Yes I got married and I have my beautiful Nina, but the love never felt like how I love you.” I was speechless. Yunho liked me, like actually likes me. “I..Yunho..” I tried to talk, but nothing came out. It was a lot to process, but my headache made it worse. Yunho looked at me, biting his lip before I felt his lips against mine. It felt so good to have him on me, I kissed him back, our lips molded together like it was suppose to be like this. We kissed for a few more minutes before I pulled my head back to breath. He was so breathtaking, no words could express how good he looked. “I..let’s talk about this later..maybe..” I mumbled. He tilted his head, “Your head still hurts?” he asked, I nodded in reply. He hummed then gave me a kiss on my cheek, “I have an idea. But I need your permission.” he whispers. I furrowed my eyebrows, “What is it..?” I questioned. “Well, I heard from some friends and maybe some articles..that sex helps..but only if you want it.” he whispers, his eyes focused on me. My mouth was agape, not knowing how to answer. I mean, SEX WITH YUNHO? YES, but my mouth couldn’t say it. “I’m..I’m okay with that.” I mumbled, looking up to him. “Don’t worry, I won’t have full sex if you’re uncomfortable. Just let me take care of you. Safe word princess?” My head buzzed, because why was he like this, so caring and sexy. I just wanted him. My head clouded with thoughts of him. “Hmm..it can be red.” I whispered, feeling his chest through his t-shirt. He gave me a smile, before his hands gripped my hips, he gave me a quick kiss on my forehead, before his head reached down to my stomach. 

His lips kissed my stomach, reaching my lower region, his hands handling my thighs. He gave quick licks to my inner thighs. I squirmed at the feeling, but my lower region gushed with need. “Yuyu..please.” I whined. He chuckled darkly, “you’ve been calling me Yunho the whole time, so go ahead. Keep calling me Yunho. Or maybe you can call me something different.” He teased, his hands softly rubbing my thighs. “S-Sir please..” I whined looking down at him. His eyes grew dark and he smirked. I lifted my lower region and he gently took off my shorts and panties, his hands immediately cupping my cunt. I let out a soft moan as his fingers rubbed my folds, the feeling was new, but I wanted more. I felt his hot breath and he suddenly landed his tongue onto my folds. My hands tugged on his hair, pushing him deeper into me. His tongue swirled around and sucked. I moaned out, “mhm.. Fuck..sir, feels so good.” He detached himself from my cunt and chuckled, “Yeah? You feel good baby?” He whispers, his voice an octave lower. My head was hazy, his lips touched my cunt once again. He began sucking on my clit, pleasure spreading throughout my body. My nerves were on high, I felt my head fill with dopamine, as it felt so good. My lower region was tightening and I squeezed my thighs together, softly squeezing Yunho’s head. He gripped my thighs and spread me out, opening me more as he lapped over my cunt. “I..I” I couldn’t speak, only moans and groans could be let out. “Go ahead and cum baby.” He mumbled before continuing his action. I felt myself release in his mouth and he kept eating me out as I was calming down, turning sensitive. “Y-Yu..too much.” I whined. He detached himself and I saw my juices around his mouth, as he used his fingers to wipe his mouth, I watched as he inserted his own fingers covered in my juices into his own mouth and he hummed. “You taste good baby.” he smirked. My body was tired, but my headache was gone, I gave him a drunken smile, “Do I now?” I said, feeling like I was high. Yunho just smiled and got off of my bed, “I’ll be right back.” he says, before leaving my room. He came back a few minutes later with a warm towel and more water. “Where’s your wardrobe, for your underwear.” He asked, looking around at the multiple cabinets. “Bottom left on the 3 layer.” I said, he walked over and opened it. I saw him smirk and grab an underwear then close it. “We have to use those toys next time.” He commented, I blushed at his comment. He gently wiped me, knowing I was still sensitive, and changed my panties. As he finished, he helped me drink water then put the blanket on top of me. He laid down next to me, I saw him take off his shirt before his body went under the covers. His arms wrapped around my waist, making me a small spoon in the bed, and I blushed. His head snuggled into my neck as he gently left pecks. “Let’s rest for now. We’ll speak later.” he whispers. I nodded and felt my body get tired, but I knew how I should feel now. Loved. He was in love with me, and I was in love with him. “I love you yuyu..” I mumbled before closing my eyes. “I love you too, my princess.”

[chickenoptyrx]

You do so right by z Broly, you understand his potential. Your au with him and Trunks is a delight

Glad we all appreciate my blatant misrepresentation of the character 😌 im partly joking but man fr, 12 year old me would hate that instead of him bein a badass edgy monster, I draw him as.. *checks notes* .. an immature loser with bad coping mechanisms uwu

Ok but in true ask tradition! :U im hijacking this ask to talk about a dumb theory thats been rolling around in my head for like 2 years now: android 16 and broly similarities:

Ok so. If you aren't aware. The android arc of dragon ball was originally going to focus on the androids 19 & 20 and trunks even names them specifically

But Toriyamas former editor, Kazuhiko Torishima, didn't like them as the main antagonists and so Toriyama changed it to focus on 17 & 18 as the bad guys and introduced 16 as a sort of mystery

Now. This gets almost completely dropped once that same former editor ALSO doesn't like these androids and cell becomes the main villian for the arc (yeah yeah, the bomb thing is technically *there*, but its so inconsequential most people forget its even a thing :T )

So. Idk exactly when movie 8 went into production, but we know Brolys LSSJ form was inspired by trunks SSJ grade3 form that appears several chapters after cell has been introduced and the androids have become power-up fodder, so im gonna argue its safe to say the decision to move away from their story had been made

(side tangent that I find absolutely hilarious btw- despite gokus commentary in the HTC, SSJ grade 3 was the strongest form of ssj we saw at this point, so its pretty appropriate to use it as the basis of the strongest scariest ssj form.... rrriiiiiiiiggght up until toriyama introduced SSJ2 on Feb 2, 1993- near exactly 1 month before the first Broly movie hit theaters. Completely undermined what, up til then, looked like a trend in stronger form = bigger and beefier right as the big beefy strongest guy ever movie came out 🤣 absolutely love it!)

So anyways. The movies overall also tend to have varying degrees of similarities with recent arcs in the show and Toriyama, while not overly involved, would give the studio designs and story notes. And. Idk. Yall can tell me im reaching if ya want, but: A guy who's made into a weapon by his father who's on a quest for revenge and has this conflicting view of his son as both someone he feels he failed to protect, someone he cares about, but also as a tool for that revenge, and someone who's destructive power hes become deeply afraid of.. now where have we seen somethin like that 🤔 may be an extra reach but I also think its neat that despite their different face shape, Toriyamas gave em the same expression

Lol they're also both just ridiculously tall bastards. Like for no gd reason. And yeah, to me atleast, it explains why hating goku specifically gets shoehorned into brolys backstory (listen I can absolutely do the mental gymnastics to make it make sense! I'm fine with it! Its fine! I actually like it! ... but it IS a dumb shoehorned plot point! Both things can be true D:< ) look just lookit these tall ass shits

Anyway. My last note is just this statement from Toriyama about 16 and Gero. The way gero is presented is really in line with how I see Paragus as this tragic failure of a father- honestly caring about his kid, but letting grief and revenge drive him into conflicting corners where he wants revenge FOR the life denied his son, but also actively shaping his son into such a terrifying weapon that ultimately hed rather his kid just never be conscious cause thats the 'only way to keep them safe'

“Dr. Gero’s son who died young a long time ago served as the visual model for Android 16. He was a high-ranking soldier for the Red Ribbon Army but was shot down by the enemy. Dr. Gero reserved special feelings for 16 as “his son,” and although he equipped 16 with immense power and a frightening destructive device, he didn’t want to see him be defeated on the battlefield and thus programmed him to have a gentle personality. 16 was consequently considered a failed creation.” The smaller caption below Toriyama’s quote reads: “Was the reason Dr. Gero didn’t want to activate 16 perhaps because of his parental love to not see him destroyed?”

[petite-gloom]

Hi Megan, you’re one of the only autistic people in their 20s that I know, so I hope it’s ok to ask this, sorry it’s so long. I just found out I’m autistic (and quite possibly ADHD - awaiting dx) and that the shyness is actually Anxiety. I’m 24. I have a degree from university but have been unemployed for the past two years. I feel so worthless, everything seems futile? But I’m starting to realise why typical 9-5 office jobs aren’t the best fit for me - like sure, I could push through every day and get the work done but it drains me so much. I’ve been trying to figure out the things that bring me autistic joy - reading, art, playing piano, and makeup are a few things. But I’ve really been struggling to find out how to make these a career, or if I even should rely on these things to make money, lest they suck the joy out of it. I’m grateful to be able to live with my parents, but part of me feels like I’m being a burden by not bringing in some income/contributing financially. Do you have any advice/suggestions for me? I’ve been entertaining the idea of creating a YouTube channel, but worry that the anxiety and ADHD will keep me from being consistent or successful. I appreciate any feedback you may have. Thank you ❤️‍🩹 I hope you’re okay 🥹

i really wish i had something helpful to offer, but i'm not sure i do. i'm only two years older than you (26) and obviously work from home doing art, but i also live with a parent and struggle a lot behind the scenes. one thing i really want to give you a heads up on is that (depending on channel size), youtube doesn't really pay a lot- with just shy of 60k subscribers and 10-20k views per video (one video a week) i usually only make around £400 a month (sometimes a little more, sometimes a little less). the amounts fluctuate, don't match your estimated earnings, and are only updated accurately within adsense around 2 days before you get paid. it's not a stable or reliable way to make a living, which is why most youtubers have additional work and income streams. £400 is obviously still £400 and im very grateful to be able to add it to the household bills/groceries etc but it obviously isn't an amount that allows me to live independently, and the fluctuating nature of the payment amounts makes it hard to rely on for anything recurring. it's also a lot of work behind the scenes, and i do find it very difficult during weeks when im feeling more anxious or my mood is low. i don't say this to be discouraging (majority of the time, it's really fun to make videos!) but i just want to be real about what it's like as a small autistic youtuber.

it's hard to suggest other options because i don't know you personally- the level of your skills, how much support you need, how much rest, etc. people tell me there's money to be made on tiktok, so maybe that's something you could consider for makeup and/or piano (the videos are shorter so i wonder if it would be a little better for anxiety/adhd)? could you offer classes for either of these things? could you sell digital art? is there any part time work along the theme of your degree? i had a weekend job at a garden centre that i enjoyed for a long time, so maybe you could find something super chill with smaller hours that would pay a bit- a book or coffee shop?

i wish it was easier and that i had more suggestions but to be honest im always thinking the same- how can i make more to help? how can i make enough to be independent? how can i survive as an autistic person? what will my future look like? and i don't really have any of the answers, much to the horror of my own increasing anxiety. but i hope you can find something fulfilling to work on that pays a little. i hope you can find something that helps you feel as though you're contributing to your household. maybe you could express your concerns to your parents, and see if there are other ways to contribute? i know you mentioned financially, but things like cooking, cleaning, grocery shopping (if you don't already) can be nice ways to help support the household while they're working. my dad cooks and does the dishes, but i do a lot of the cleaning, and have recently taken over ordering and paying for groceries. he's autistic too, and this helps free up some of his mental space.

i don't know if any of this is helpful, but i hope it is. even if it isn't, please know that you're not alone in these concerns, or in this issue. i think it's a difficulty that all autistic people face as they age. we have different needs, often limited abilities, and it's very difficult to stay afloat in a world that is increasingly expensive, where you're expected to be able to work for more hours than you rest. i wish it was a bit easier for everyone. i wish things weren't so hard for disabled people especially

[koqabear]

Just for Tonight? 

Song suggestion: 10-20-40, Rina Sawayama

Summary:

Choi Yeonjun needs a distraction— and so do you. And while he didn’t plan on it, he’s sure that the feeling of you is greater than any drug he’s experienced; he’ll be sure to keep you in his sight. 

Yeonjun x fem!reader

Genre: pwp, strangers to lovers, bad boy!yj, smut, a tiny sprinkle of angst 

Word count: 3.8K

Warnings: Jay slander I’m sorry I don’t mean it, Yeonjun is lowkey mean, dom!yj, sub!mc, use of alcohol, use of marijuana, fingering (?), public sex, degradation, pet names, dry humping, slapping, unprotected sex, dacryphilia (lemme know if I should add anything!)

Notes: for some reason this was about to become another longfic— then I remembered, I don’t have time for that. So here’s a short self indulgent snippet instead, based on the song 10-20-40 by Rina Sawayama! Feedback and comments are always appreciated, enjoy <3

Choi Yeonjun could only be found in the darkest corners of parties.

Not on campus, and certainly not in classes— when he did attend, it was simply to make sure that his degree wouldn’t be slipping through his hands. 

He was apathetic, the red solo cup the only thing that could ground him as he took another sip of his drink. His mind was fuzzy, watching the rest of the crowd move on by, not bothering to spare him a glance as they moved to a fun and brighter spot. The alcohol in his system was the only thing that kept him from leaving, the table filled with every drink imaginable tempting him to stay longer— perks of going to a party at Jay’s place, he remembers— afterall, the only thing that brought people to like the guy was his money. 

The party was like any other, the strong bass sending vibrations to his drink as he watched the condensed group of bodies in the living room, bumping and grinding to the music as they let themselves go. The distant smell of weed hit his nose, and it wasn’t long before he caught sight of the small group that lay back on the couches, passing the blunt back and forth as they slouched down, muttering incoherent thoughts to each other over the loud music. 

If Yeonjun didn’t have the reputation he did, then he wouldn’t have been able to make his way to the group, marching right up as he shared a solemn nod with them. It wasn’t long before the blunt was passed in his direction, and he allowed himself to stay for a while as the addicting feeling of the smoke coursing through him and sinking into his bones let him relax for the first time since arriving to this miserable party. 

But, like always, he found himself tiring out of being around the same people, beginning to find their rough and rude mannerisms annoying as he walked away. The task proved itself to be much harder than he thought, pushing past the bodies of people that continued to get in his way as he stumbled to the kitchen, clumsy hands reaching into a cooler before he found himself grabbing a water bottle— the cooler was practically untouched, he noted grimly. 

The chilled bottle was wet, dripping onto his forearms and making his palm slippery as he made his way to the backyard, eyes heavy as he leaned against the porch. It was quiet, the muffled bass that came from within the house and the flashing lights the only reminder of where he was. 

What a boring party, he thought, thinking back to the amount of faceless people that tried to get into his pants, only to get pissed off when he couldn’t bother to bat an eye in their direction, I should get going. 

Just when he thought that this might go down as one of the worst parties he’s been to— the very last one being one that had been busted by the cops— his eyes caught onto something peculiar; or rather, someone peculiar. 

If he hadn’t been more observant, then his eyes would have easily passed over your hunched figure, dressed up prettily with your head bowed down as you sat on one of the stones that surrounded a large koi pond. He said nothing, watching the way you stared off into the water, index finger reaching out to swirl around the water as you pouted and mumbled off into the quiet air, your drink placed off to the side and left untouched. 

You reached a hand up to adjust your hair, pushing it out of your face as you shifted on the stone, thighs pressed together uncomfortably— that’s when Yeonjun recognized you. 

His eyes widened in recognition as your name ran through his mind; senior valedictorian back in high school, your reputation carrying well into college as you continued to put yourself in important positions. And, you’re part of the student government— president of his class as well, his brain automatically corrected him. He watched you carefully, pushing down a laugh that had been threatening to escape him.

What the hell were you doing here?

Your reason had a name; Park Jongseong. Not only had you been invited by the very owner of the place, but you had also been promised that he would stick by your side— you had been foolish to think that he would keep his promise. 

Park Jongseong has been an ongoing crush for you. It was embarrassing to admit, but the boy had somehow managed to keep your attention since your first year in college. It was a constant push and pull between you two, with every flirty comment and interaction leading to more questions and what ifs. You really thought that this party might have been the time where he redeems himself, but you couldn’t have been more wrong about your assumption; all you were met with was the sight of a girl kissing up on his neck, pressing herself against him crudely before he led her upstairs, barely meeting your eye before he continued to pull the girl along— not an ounce of recognition or guilt had crossed his face.

Which led you to where you were— cursing the boy out under your breath as you tried to not fall apart with shame; had you really thought that you had a chance with the boy? That he would take you seriously?

The sight was pathetic— and Yeonjun allowed himself to stand back and enjoy it. You were usually so put together, and to see the fire in your eye be snubbed out like so, it was intriguing. This version of you, left all by yourself and hunching down as if you were trying to make yourself invisible, was so different from the version Yeonjun always saw. 

The version that was formidable and put together, always greeting everyone— hell, even him, when he bothered to show up— and always helping others when they came to you; that was what he always saw. You were perfect, not a single crack or slip up ever coming from your behalf as you always managed to stay on top of things. You were confident, and shone brightly wherever you went. But that version was nothing like what he saw now. 

What he saw now was the way your eyes were downcast, a pout on your lips as your eyes shone under the moonlight. You’re fighting back tears, he realizes. From what, he doesn’t know— but he does know that he wants to find out.

Since the two miserable hours he’s spent here, (it’s not much, but considering how many parties he’s been to, it’s really saying something.) he finds himself wanting to stay a little longer, lithe steps quiet on the dewy grass as he makes his way towards you, the air around him still misty from the rain that poured hours earlier. You’re cute, he thinks to himself, watching the way you wrap your arms around yourself, eyes too focused on the fish that roam around the pond to notice the figure approaching you. 

“Miss president, how’d you end up in this crowd of people?” 

You’re jumping violently at the sound of his voice, the deep timbre slicing through the silence of the night as he watches you stumble on your words, flustered at the realization that you had been caught in such a place. You’re looking up at him, eyes wide as you try to explain yourself— only to stop mid sentence, realizing that there’s no need for you to do so. 

“Why do you care?” Is all you spit out, cringing at the way the smell of weed follows him, his lidded eyes and cocked brow telling you that he’s not going to take your hints to be left alone; you groan internally when he settles down next to you. 

“Why shouldn’t I? Our precious president could get hurt in such a dangerous environment.” He’s mocking you. You’re grinding your teeth at his words, fighting back a venomous response as you watch the way he continues to insult you, grinning childishly as he seems to realize his impact on you. 

“As if you’d care about anything school related,” you jab, turning away from him as you tune out his breathy chuckles, closing your eyes as you try to calm yourself down. First the situation with Jay, now this? You really couldn’t catch a break. 

“You’re right, I don’t care about anything school related,” Yeonjun confesses, noticing the way you glance back at him curiously. He’s wrapping a hand around your waist, pulling you in as he leans on your shoulder, the smell of alcohol and weed mixing with the scent of his cologne— it’s oddly intoxicating.

“It’s you I care about.” 

“You don’t even know me,” you say, turning back to him as you look into his eyes, your expression mirroring his— you’re curious, eyes lidded as you take in the sudden close proximity. 

“I’d like to,” he muses, his other hand placing itself on your waist as well as he smiles mischievously. You’re even prettier up close, he notices, and he’s deciding that he wouldn’t mind taking his mind off of everything for a while as he adds, “will you let me?”

Little does he know, you’re thinking the same thing. Your mind is coursing rapidly with the memories of Jay, with the bitter reminder that all he’s done is mess with your emotions— he brought you all the way out here, only to leave you high and dry in an environment that leaves you sticking out like a sore thumb. 

He’s cute, you decide, eyes flicking down to his parted lips as you let yourself lean in, his hair brushing against your forehead as you can feel the deep rise and fall of your bodies, syncing together as you take each other in. 

“Just for tonight.” 

There’s nothing else he needs to hear before he’s on you, lips bruising against yours as you try to hold back your surprise, your groan muffled against his lips as he leans into you, caging you in until all you can think of is him. You allow his hands to wander as they trace roughly around your body, landing on your thighs as they squeeze roughly, pulling them apart as he reaches underneath your skirt as he cups your mound, laughing meanly at the gasp you let out.

“Let me fuck you,” He pleads softly against your lips, restless as he grabs your hand before he brings it down to his jeans, letting you feel the bulge that has formed in his pants, stifling a groan as you begin to trace along the shape of his cock, “I’ll make you feel so good.” 

Yeonjun knows that he doesn’t need to do much begging. He can feel it with the way your thighs tremble from his touch, lip quivering at the way he sinks his teeth into the soft flesh, pulling and sucking at it as he pulls away briefly, watching the way your lashes flutter against your cheeks, your eyes closing helplessly with every rough touch of his fingers on your pussy. 

He can feel your underwear dampening with every teasing touch, the fabric sticking to you uncomfortably as he pushes against the barrier, testing you as he teases your entrance. You’re gripping onto his shoulders, allowing him to take over your body as he sucks on your tongue, enjoying the way you drool at his actions, soft squeals escaping you with every rough thrust he delivers with his fingers. 

He’s tracing along your slit, occasionally pulling out to feel you grind desperately against his fingers, only to push back in, the feeling of his fabric covered fingers making you tighten your hold on him. You think your panties might tear with the way he’s roughly pushing into your hole, the fabric messy from your arousal as he pulls out once more, fingers fluttering over your clit before he’s tracing soft circles on it, thoroughly enjoying every sound that escapes your mouth.

It drives you mad, knowing that if he just pushed aside your panties, you would be able to feel his pretty hands on you, long fingers gliding into your walls with ease. But you’re left to drip on your underwear uselessly, allowing him to break you as you beg pathetically for him to do something, to give you more. 

“Please fuck me, please please please,” you beg, breathless and just as restless as he is, entangling a hand into his hair as he sucks and nips at the skin on your neck, “please, wanna feel your cock, want you to fuck me so bad.” 

Yeonjun thinks he might just engrave this moment into his mind, enjoying the sounds of your begging much more than he anticipated. He’s pulling away, and before you can whine about the loss of him on you, you’re yelping at the way he’s grabbed a fistful of your hair, your head pulled back as he guides you to stand up, eyes quickly scanning the backyard before he’s leading you to the wooden gazebo, his hand now locked onto your elbow roughly.

It’s dark, partly because Jay hadn’t bothered to turn on the lights to the backyard— he hadn’t thought that anyone would be interested in going there anyway. But it’s perfect for the two of you, and you’re unable to take your hands off Yeonjun as he’s leaning you against the wooden railing, your back hitting the damp wood as you can feel it dampen your shirt, mouth falling open as Yeonjun is back on your lips. 

“Fuck, who would’ve thought that our perfect little president was such a fucking whore,” Yeonjun grits out, hands grabbing at your waist before he’s flipping you over, grinning at the pretty arch in your back, ass sticking out as you impatiently wait for his next move, “Fucking a guy she’s never met, didn’t think this pussy would be so easy to get.” 

“Don’t care, just want a distraction,” you admit, thighs trembling as he flips up your skirt, laughing cruelly as his eyes darken at the sight of your lacy underwear. His mind is caught on your words, wondering what you might mean by that as he’s pulling down your underwear, watching the way you allow him to guide you to step out of it— you don’t realize it was because he was eager to stuff the material in his pocket. 

“A distraction? From what, pretty girl?” He asks, grinning at the way the nickname sends shivers down your body, the feeling sending ripples of arousal straight down to your core. You’re dripping wet by now, the anticipation of it all leaving you restless and desperate as you grip onto the railing, hips pushing back in hopes of coming in contact with him. 

But all you get in return is a harsh slap on your ass, the sound ringing out in the night, followed by your pathetic yelps. Your knuckles are white as he slaps you two more times, soothing the sting as he rubs on the skin, his breath fanning on your ear as he smiles at the way you jump at the feeling. 

“I asked you a question,” he mutters, hands gripping onto your hips as he roughly pulls you back, your bare pussy coming in contact with the harsh material of his jeans. You gasp, back arching as you feel him rut against you, a wet spot forming on his jeans from your arousal the longer he presses you against him. 

“A distraction from what?” He asks again, and he’s keen to notice the way you don’t want to answer him, whimpers leaving your lips as he slows his pace, all stimulation leaving your body as he waits patiently for your answer. 

“Answer, or I’ll leave you here like the desperate whore you are,” he says, knowing that he wouldn’t dream of walking away from such a sight. But it’s enough to make you break, straightening up as he can see the panic flashing through your eyes. He holds back a laugh as he watches you, taking in the way you contemplate your words before you’re hanging your head, muttering something incoherently under your breath. 

“What was that pretty girl?” He asks, taking your chin in his hand as he’s tilting you to look back at him, eyes shining from the embarrassment of it all, the low light failing to hide your flustered state as you repeat yourself. 

“A distraction from Jay,” you confess, the words barely leaving your lips before you’re watching the way Yeonjun’s jaw is clenching, the mention of the other man seemingly hitting a nerve. 

“Tell me darling,” he says, turning you back around before he’s leaning you over, the sound of a zipper unbuckling making you tingle with anticipation. You’re nervous, unsure of what he might say or think of you as you stare off into the night sky silently.

“Why the hell did you get your hopes up with Jay, of all people,” he seethes, rolling his eyes at the very mention of the man. You’re shaking your head, unsure yourself as you feel him prod at your entrance, head falling down to rest on your hands as you stare down at the wooden floor beneath you. Your eyes are glassy as you feel his hands spread your cheeks apart, his eyes watching the way he’s slowly sinking his cock into you. 

Yeonjun pauses— you’re warm, and so, so tight, your walls fluttering wildly around his cock as he feels the way you try to accommodate his size, your hips circling subconsciously as you quietly whine for more. He thinks this might be the best party he’s gone to.

“Such a stupid slut, poor thing doesn’t know when a man is just playing with her,” he sighs out, aware of the way his words seem to hit you much harder than he intended to. He watches the way you’re trying to hide from him, your head resting on your hands as you refuse to straighten up, a soft sniffle escaping you as you try to ignore the way your shaking shoulders give you away— your squeezing walls only make things worse. 

You’re embarrassed, truly. The one time you decide to get out of your comfort zone, and it’s all thrown back into your face. You wish you could say that you hadn’t seen this coming, but you know that you’re not capable of lying to yourself like that; and it only makes things worse. So it’s involuntary, when tears begin to escape your eyes, but you don’t seem to be aware of the way Yeonjun only seems to throb harder at the sight, scoffing as he buries himself deeper inside of you. 

“It’s okay, darling,” he coos, slowly pulling out as he allows you to feel every vein that brushes against your walls, to feel the way he throbs uncontrollably at the sight before him, “I’ll make you forget all about him.” 

And Yeonjun delivers— fuck, he does more than that as he sets a ruthless pace, gripping onto your hips as he watches the way you surge forward with every thrust, your hand clamped tightly over your mouth as you try to not let the rest of the neighborhood hear your screams of pleasure. You’re letting yourself go as you allow your heart to feel all the emotions you’ve been bottling up all night; you’re crying, but the tears that flow down your face are quickly transformed from tears of pain to tears of pleasure. 

Park Jongseong, Yeonjun thinks to himself, watching the way you crumble underneath his touch, eyebrows scrunching together as he continues to fuck himself into you, aware of the fact that you’re still upset about the incident that brought the two of you to meet, Fuck you. 

Yeonjun can’t help but pity the man for a split second, knowing that he’s wasted such a good opportunity to feel you— to feel the way you clench tightly around him, begging incoherently for him as your words slip through the cracks of your fingers, legs trembling and threatening to buckle from the intense pleasure of it all. 

Which only makes watching you come undone all the more satisfying, feeling the way you clench on him ruthlessly as he continues to drive his cock deeper into you, his thrusts harsh and consistent as he lets you ride out your orgasm. His name is like a prayer on your lips, the sound sweet as honey as he finds himself shivering at the sound— Yeonjun, Yeonjun, Yeonjun…

Yet just as you think it might all be over the moment he pulls out of you, you’re being pulled away, allowing yourself to be manhandled by this man with shaky legs as he repositions you, your back pressing against a pillar of the gazebo before he’s gripping onto your thigh, bringing it up and around his waist as he enters you once more. 

Fuck, you think to yourself, eyes fluttering shut as he begins to fuck you once more, the new position allowing him to rub against the spot that drives you mad, he’s not done yet. 

You’re left helpless against his rough thrusts, hands finding purchase on anything you can find, flying wildly from the railing next to you, to his shoulders, until they finally thread themselves back into his hair as you’re pulling him in for another kiss. His grip on you is fatal, and at this point, he was practically holding you up himself as he continued to fuck you, groaning into your mouth with every clench he felt from your pussy. 

“Fuck, fuck fuck!” He gasps out, feeling the way your sensitive pussy only continues to suck him in. He briefly pulls away from your lips to watch the way he disappears inside you, his panting breaths matching yours as you both watch his slick cock slide in and out of you with ease. You’re practically dripping onto the wooden floor beneath you, the sight only making Yeonjun pound harder into you as he watches the way you can only beg him for more.

It only takes a couple more thrusts before he’s pulling out of you, eyes lidded and glazed as he pumps his cock harshly, mouth falling open as he cums all over you, over the supple skin of your thighs and the pretty skirt that had him hooked from the moment he saw you in it. 

The two of you are silent and panting as you hold onto each other, the muffled bass that came from within the house and the flashing lights the only reminder of where you were. You look back up at him, and he smiles half-heartedly, the two of you laughing quietly at everything that just happened. You can’t help the way you become shy as he stares down at you— because, now what?

“Something tells me this won’t be the last time I’ll be seeing you,” he mumbles, allowing himself to indulge in you as he leans in, lips connecting with yours as he kisses you slowly, smiling at the way you grip onto him weakly. You’re shaking your head in response, pulling him closer by the shirt as you pull away briefly, giving you just enough time to say, 

“Definitely not. Wanna get outta here?”

And fuck, of course he does.

[amberlynnmurdock]

Blind Faith

Chapter 7: His Wrath

Pairing: Matt Murdock x Reader

Summary: You unexpectedly do some investigative work when you go out with your friends.

Warnings: angst, mentions of drug use

A/N: I hope you like this angsty chapter! After this, things really pick up, ahh!

Tag list: @starry-night-20 @sumsytee @queerqueenlynn @mattmurdocksstarlight

Hell’s Kitchen

After that night at Josie’s, you felt much more comfortable walking into work at Nelson  & Murdock. Mostly because now you knew you were on all three of their good sides—Matt was the most challenging (and honestly, the only challenging) of the bunch to win over. You must’ve said something right at Josie’s because ever since then, Matt’s gone out of his way to greet you in the morning or offer you help on a case. No longer did he simply brush past you with a vague nod of acknowledgment. No longer did he avoid having you in his presence. 

One morning, you came to the office earlier than usual to prepare for the day. You locked the door. Karen gave you the key the night before and you took it upon yourself to replenish their kitchen: the office was low on paper plates, styrofoam cups, and coffee. No one asked you to do this. You just wanted to. You wiped the kitchen counter with Lysol—when was the last time anyone cleaned this?—and then you added the new paper plates in the cupboards and stacked the cups next to them. Finally, your favorite part: brewing a fresh pot of coffee. 

Suddenly, the creaky front door trying to be opened startled you. You started the brewer and made your way to the door, peering through the window pane to see who it was. It was Matt. You paused before you unlocked the door and let him inside. 

You greeted Matt with a smile. 

“Good morning, Matt,” you said lightly. 

“Mornin’,” he greeted with a hint of a smile. His cane tapped the floor as he stepped in. “You’re here early.”

“Oh, yeah, I wanted to refill the cabinets. I noticed we were low on plates, cups, and coffee.” 

Matt smiled as he shrugged off his blazer, and hung it on a coat rack. It felt strange, watching him do this, so you looked away. He leaned his cane against the wall. 

“Coffee is a must,” Matt chuckled, “Thank you. You didn’t have to do that. I’ll tell Karen to reimburse you.”

“No worries,” you declined, “consider it repayment for all the drinks from Josie’s.” 

Matt’s smile softened. You could almost see his eyes behind his dark red glasses. You realized how you held your hands behind your back, let go of the hold you had, and relaxed a bit. You shared a comfortable moment of silence. 

Just as Matt was about to head into his office, he paused. 

“Hey, uh,” he began. He had a look on his face like he was choosing his next words carefully. “I noticed you kept the door locked until I got here. You can talk to Karen about having someone open with you if you feel safer that way.” 

You thought about it for a moment. It wasn’t a big deal, and you thought nothing of it when you locked it initially—just that it made sense to lock it. But you appreciated Matt’s concern, and his earnestness warmed your heart. For someone who came off as so guarded, he sure did have a soft side. Why didn’t he show it more often? 

“Maybe I will,” you said anyway. “Thank you. Oh, did you want some coffee?” You asked as you heard the brewer go off. Matt raised his eyebrows. 

“Oh, uh, yes please,” he responded. 

“How do you like it?” 

“Black.” 

For some reason, this made you laugh. Matt had a look of amusement on his face, not sure what was so funny. 

“What?” He smiled. 

You shrugged your shoulders, “It just makes sense I guess. You taking your coffee black. I don’t know. It seems very appropriate for a defense lawyer. Maybe when I get my law degree and pass the bar, I’ll also be a black coffee drinker.” 

Matt laughed at this. You went to pour his coffee and fix your own as well. On second thought, you decided to have it black, too. When you walked out of the kitchen, you expected Matt to be at his desk, but he still stood in the doorway of his office, waiting for you. 

He raised his hand to meet you as you handed him his cup. You placed it so it was easy for Matt to wrap his fingers around it. When he did, his fingers just grazed against your own. You tried your best to ignore the feeling.  

“Thank you,” he said softly. 

“I decided to try black as well.” 

He grinned. This time, he went into his office and sat at his desk. You blew on your hot cup of coffee and felt the steam warm your face. 

Mornings like this didn’t stop. In fact, you purposefully started to come to the office earlier in the morning just so you could have a few moments with Matt. It may seem inappropriate, but your intentions with Matt were innocent. You wanted to learn from him. And something told you Matt shared the same sentiments, to come early in the morning. It wasn’t required of him, but ever since that first morning you shared, he continued coming in early. It sort of became an unspoken rule…or ritual, for the two of you to open early. 

You took advantage of the mornings to ask him about his time at Columbia. You picked his brain for his advice on law school and studying. One day, you asked him why he wanted to become a lawyer.

Matt was hesitant at first…like he always was. He clicked his tongue and leaned against the wall, with his hands in his pockets. His tie was a little crooked. You continued to wonder what his eyes looked like behind his dark red glasses. Finally, he answered. And when he did, you immediately understood why he hesitated to answer such a question. You never thought his answer could be so heavy. 

“My father,” he started, “He was a boxer. It was just him and I when I grew up. He was a fighter—while he hit the mat, he made me hit the books,” he chuckled a little like he’s told this story before and he never tires of it. “I liked studying. I wanted to make him proud. Especially after…” He drifted off. You smiled softly. You wished he could see you were encouraging him. “He was murdered. Shortly after my accident. He never wanted me to fight like he did. So what better way to fight than by using the law?” 

“Wow,” you breathed. “That’s really touching, Matt.” 

Matt didn’t respond. He just smiled, rather sadly. 

“Thank you for sharing that with me,” you added. 

“You’re welcome,” he said. 

And then, your mornings with him would end when either Karen or Foggy arrived at the office. They never questioned anything, but you weren’t sure they even noticed. And as you sat at your desk, flipping through files and scrolling Westlaw, something occurred to you—Matt probably wasn’t telling them about your mornings, either. It was interesting. And you thought nothing of it more. 

Matt came by your desk quite frequently during the day. He was always kind with what he had for you. Could you translate these into Braille? Do you want to go over legal arguments? Could you prep my brief for the hearing? And you gladly did all of it. He could ask you anything and you’d say yes. 

⣿⣿⣿⣿ New York City 

It’s been a while since you went out with your friends. With studying for the LSAT, starting your job at Nelson & Murdock, and…your secret late-night meetings with Mike, you barely had time for yourself. This weekend though, Foggy practically had to tear your laptop away from your hands so you’d go home and “get in all kinds of trouble with your friends” as he said. You’re not one to argue over having a good time. 

You got ready with your friends. It was almost time to head out to the bar. This time, you’d be heading a little uptown, not where you usually go out with them. 

“Finally, you’re coming out with us! Gosh, it felt like forever!” Hannah squeezed your thigh in the back of the taxi. You smiled at her. 

“I know! I am definitely due for a night out,” you said, feeling the warmth of the tequila settle in your stomach. For some reason, you felt a little nervous going out tonight. Perhaps it had been a while so you forgot “going out etiquette.” You are suddenly worried about things you usually never did—where you were going, how you’d get home, would you be out too late. One glance at your friends and all those worries faded away—everything would be okay, as long as you stuck together. 

Besides. You had the phone Mike gave you in your purse. With this in mind, the uneasy feeling in your chest subsided. 

When the taxi pulled up at the club Emily had chosen for tonight, you admired its gothic architecture, what you could see of it. It was already dark, but the building had harsh fluorescent lights shining on the front. You could see stained glasses that stretched far up and disappeared where the light couldn’t reach. 

“Was this an old Cathedral or something?” You wondered aloud. 

“How perceptive,” Emily chides. “Yes.” 

It felt wrong, that an old Cathedral was renovated into a club where not so holy things would take place. 

Bella bumped into you and squeezed your shoulders. 

“Time for an epic night!” 

⣿⣿⣿⣿ 11:00 PM 

No matter how hard you tried, you just couldn’t sink the feeling of not really feeling present with your friends at the club. 

It’s not that you weren’t having fun with them—you just kept thinking about so many other things you could be doing right now. Foggy let you take home some legal books from the office and you’ve been wanting to start reading those. You could be studying for the LSAT right now. Even the alcohol at this club wasn’t that good. You thought of Josie’s and how much your drinks tasted better when it was made by a middle-aged woman with a permanent scowl on her face than it was when the chiseled bartender with blonde hair made it. 

You couldn’t bare to be in there anymore. And something felt wrong, getting drunk in a place that used to be a place of worship. You weren’t that religious, but it still didn’t sit right with you for some reason. 

Hannah was dancing with Emily. Bella found Andre and stood by him with a drink. You made a gesture to Hannah to let her know you were going to get fresh air. No. I’ll be good alone. 

You met the cool summer breeze instantly as you stepped out of the club. There was a line to get in now. A burly bouncer stood in front of you with his arms crossed. 

“Once you leave you have to stand in line again,” he said in a deep voice. You waved him off.

“Whatever,” you muttered. 

Walking down the street, away from the crowds of drunk people, you walked slowly and watched your feet in front of you, step by step. You thought of Mike. Despite him coming to see you almost every night, he did remind you that sometimes he’d have to prowl other parts of the city, to make sure people are safe. You understood. You made him promise you that his last stop would always be your apartment, though. But you had a feeling you wouldn’t see him tonight, even though you wanted to. 

You reached the end of the street. It was quiet, uptown. Completely different from being downtown where there was always something going on at each corner. Uptown had more of a neighborhood and less of a nightlife. The corner of the street read West 61st and Tenth. 

Squinting your eyes, you cocked your head, staring at the street sign as if it were in another language. Why did that seem so familiar? 

And then it dawned on you. Ms. Cruz! One of Nelson & Murdock’s newer clients. The older woman in the dangerous apartment building. The one where the landlord wouldn’t do anything unless there was proof. How sick of him, to make an old woman put herself in danger like that. It was a very rundown building, from what you remember reading in her file, and she was basically the only trusted adult in the building. However…

No. You told yourself. Matt said to keep work and life separate. To not get involved. 

But… you were right here. On her street. With a phone that could take photos and videos. This is the proof Ms. Cruz needed for something to get done! 

And… you weren’t clocked in at Nelson & Murdock. You could do whatever you wanted. You thought of Mike—what would he do? He’d go in there and take care of it himself. Why shouldn’t you? 

You couldn’t specifically remember her building address, but it was clear enough which rundown apartment building it was. Smack in the center of the street, the only building not connected to the other brownstones that lined up. Another indicator was the people in a haze, drugged out of their minds laying on the ground and lining the steps. No one seemed to notice you, until you felt a greasy hand grab onto your arm, digging into your skin. 

“Hey!” You yelped lowly, so as to not wake the other people sleeping. 

“Are you the dealer they sent?” An old man asks you. You yanked out of his grasp and ignored him, walking into the building. Jesus. It shouldn’t have been that easy to get inside. You quickly took notes on your phone of what you saw. The people in a haze who needed help, the lack of security system to get into the building. Half-broken steps, ripped wallpaper. You shook your head, remembering that Ms. Cruz said kids lived here, too. You took pictures of what you saw and felt your arm sting from when the man grabbed you. It looks like he left a mark. 

There was booming music coming from an apartment above. You stepped over another sleeping person, a woman, and walked upstairs slowly. You gasped again when she grabbed your ankle, tugging gently. 

“Are you an angel?” She asked with half-moon eyes. You pulled your ankle of out her grasp and continued to walk up the steps to the second floor of the building. You continued to snap pictures on your phone and even managed to take a video of the hallway. The lights made everything look like a sea green. You covered your nose with your arm to block out the stench. There were dirty towels everywhere, and in the distance, you could hear children laughing. You shook your head. This is no place for a child to grow up. 

Up another flight of stairs, you saw the first door ajar. There was a TV flashing, but no noise came from it. You took a deep breath—out of fear or to block out the stench, you weren’t sure—and slightly pushed it open to reveal a man asleep, half naked on the couch, his arm tightly tied with a white tee shirt. You snapped a picture and hurriedly closed the door. 

“You ain’t what I ordered,” a drunken loll comes from your side. There’s a man standing in between a doorway, his belly hanging out over his underwear and a cigarette in his hand. “But you’ll do.” 

You immediately dashed down the stairs, jumping over the new bodies that have taken a seat, and run out of the apartment building, nearly out of breath as you make your way back to the club. You leaned against the building of the Cathedral, wishing it were a real place of worship and not a renovated club with trashy music and a liquor license. In the distance up at the top, you see a statue of an angel, looking down at you. 

⣿⣿⣿⣿ Office of Nelson & Murdock 10 AM 

It’s raining.

You walked all the way to Nelson & Murdock under a black umbrella, counting your steps until you arrived at the rusty red door with the golden and black plaque that read Nelson & Murdock. You decided to come in later to share what you “worked” on over the weekend when everyone was there. You skipped your early morning with Matt to do so. 

Entering the building, you shook off the water from your umbrella and leaned it in the hall. You wiped your shoes on the carpet and made your way up to the office. You could already smell the coffee Karen was brewing. Delighted to see no clients yet, you were hopeful for a calm, productive work day. 

“Good morning!” Karen beamed at you. “Coffee’s done. Feel free to fix a cup for yourself. Foggy also got bagels for us to brighten this rainy Monday.”

You smiled at her and hung your raincoat on the rack. In the corner of your eye, you saw Matt step out of his office. Foggy came in from the conference room. 

“I’m sure Foggy has the power to brighten even the darkest of days,” you said under your breath to Karen. She giggled behind her cup and took a sip. 

You poured yourself some coffee, black, and cut a bagel in half, setting the toaster for five minutes. Entering the room again, Foggy looked at you expectantly with a smile. 

“Thanks for the bagels,” you raised your cup in acknowledgment. “I didn’t get a chance to stop for breakfast so this is perfect.” 

“Ain’t no thang,” Foggy waved his hand. “So. How was everyone’s weekend?” 

“Same old,” Karen shrugged. “Caught up on sleep, finally.” 

“Ha,” Foggy laughed, “same. Marci and I stayed in. I don’t party like I used to anymore. Matt?”

“Same here,” Matt agreed, almost like he didn’t even think of the question. 

“I bet __ here had the most interesting weekend of us all. She’s the partier, I know it! Ahh, I miss my college days…” Foggy trailed off. “How was your weekend?” He asked you. 

Well, it was now or never. Part of you was excited to let them know you did some investigative work, the other part was unsure of how they would react. Matt seemed more interested in the conversation now, by the way he turned to face you. A hint of a smile on his lips. 

“On Friday I went out with my friends. Some Cathedral turned club uptown. I’d never been before. I didn’t care for the way they renovated it,” you trailed off, biting your lip. Karen looked at you inquisitively and Foggy waited for you to finish. Matt’s face was unreadable. 

“But actually, I ended up doing a bit of work while I was there,” you admitted. Karen raised her eyebrows while Foggy nodded his head. 

“Oh? Really?” Karen asked. Matt placed his hands on his waist. 

“So like I said, I didn’t really care for the club. I wasn’t even that drunk—er, sorry, I think I can talk like that to you guys?—anyway, I left for some fresh air and started walking up the street and then I noticed the street I was on—it was the same as where Ms. Cruz lives.” 

You waited for their reactions. Foggy and Karen listened intently. You glanced at Matt, whose face was as hard as the ground you stood on. When you told them you snuck into the apartment to take pictures, they all fell silent. Karen and Foggy shared a nervous glance and you were stunned to see Matt react first. 

“You what?” His brows scrunched in disbelief, his frown ever apparent on his face. You stuttered as Karen sat up from her seat and Foggy shifted uncomfortably. 

“I went inside and sort of scoped the place out,” you answered weakly. “But don’t worry! I—I didn’t—” 

“Oh my, God,” Karen said in realization as she walked over to you and touched your arm. Apparently, the man had grabbed you harder than you thought, and there was a large black and blue bruise that wrapped around near your elbow. It looked like a tattoo. 

“Oh, uh, it’s nothing. I didn’t even realize—“

“You mean this is from when you went inside? Someone grabbed you?” Karen asked, gasping. She gently ran her fingers over the bruise. 

“What?” Matt asked “What—you’re bruised? Jesus Christ, __, were you even thinking?!” Matt bellowed as he shook his head. You were taken aback by his harshness. You were expecting them to possibly be unhappy, at least Karen and Foggy were, but Matt looked like he was about to punch a wall, to say the least. His face was as red as his glasses. You were speechless. 

“Matt—“ Foggy protested, in an attempt to calm down his partner, his friend. Your heart hammered in your chest and you felt your body begin to shake. 

“Do you realize how much danger you put yourself in? And none of us knew? You didn’t think to consult with us before you did something like that?” Matt continued, hammering into your sensitivity. You began to speak but he stopped you again. He raised a finger at you like you were some child. 

“Not to mention, entirely illegal,” Matt huffed. “You thought putting yourself in danger like that was helping our case? It could’ve put this firm in jeopardy, along with your life,” Matt ran a hand through his hair in exasperation. “Could you—could you imagine what that would’ve done to us if you…” he trailed off, in anger or disappointment, you didn’t know. Hearing his words reminded you of the feeling you get when you have a sore throat. No matter what you eat, tasteless or sweet, it’s all hard to swallow. And it hurts. It really fucking hurts. 

His hands balled into fists. The toaster dinged, causing you to jump. 

“I—I’m sorry,” you whispered, like a child who just got caught doing something bad. Matt almost looked at you but stopped himself. 

“Matt,” Foggy clenched his jaw. “My office. Now.” Matt ignored him, walking into his own office and slamming the door behind him. You jumped again at the sound. Without thinking, clearly you were good at that, you grabbed your raincoat and went right outside the building, to be alone. 

Karen followed you down—you heard the door open and shut behind you. You leaned against the brick building in the rain. Karen looked around and saw you standing, face in your hands. 

“Hey,” she cooed, placing a hand on your shoulder, “he didn’t mean any of that. Believe me.”

“He looked pretty convincing,” you muttered. “I didn’t know it was such a big deal. I thought I was helping.” Tears trailed down your cheeks. You wiped them in embarrassment. You hated crying. It took a lot to make you cry. Matt made it look so easy. 

Karen’s blue eyes softened. She was so kind, you thought. She smiled a little. “You did help. Just between you and me, I would’ve done the same thing and…and I have, before.” 

You looked at her curiously. 

She took a deep breath and bit her lip. 

“There’s a reason why Matt got so upset with you. A few years ago, back when Fisk had this city wrapped around his finger, a woman came into our office. We were barely a firm then. Her name was Elena Cardenas,” she explained, “she had a very similar situation to Ms. Cruz. One night, I went to her apartment complex alone, with nothing but a can of mace,” Karen laughed at the memory, “but on the way out, the criminal element that was mentioned in her case followed me. Two guys cornered me and if Foggy hadn’t of followed me and fought them with a baseball bat…I don’t know what could’ve happened. And later, Ms. Cardenas was murdered by that same criminal element.” 

You shook your head in sadness, feeling sorry for Ms. Cardenas, Ms. Cruz… 

“I’m sorry, Karen,” you sniffed, feeling comfortable to be vulnerable with her. “I didn’t know the stakes were that high. I was just trying to help.” 

“I know,” she comforted, grabbing your hand and squeezing. “Believe me, I’m honestly proud of what you did. Matt is just…” she struggled to find the words, “he cares a lot about us. Despite what you may think. He’s been through a lot with… Fisk… all of our lives have been in danger before because of him. He doesn't want that to happen to you.” 

You stayed silent. 

“I know Matt could’ve handled that a lot better and I definitely will be talking to him about that,” Karen spoke with conviction, “but try to understand where he’s coming from.” 

You nodded. You did understand, completely. But still, it was shocking to be yelled at like that. Scolded at. What happened to all those quiet mornings you shared with him? His softness you finally had gotten used to? It seemed like now you were back to square one. 

Karen let you go home for the rest of the day. You ignored your friends who sat in the living room. You feigned illness, saying you suddenly felt sick and went home early. You threw off your work clothes and slid into bed, burying yourself under blankets and pillows. 

⣿⣿⣿⣿ 10:30 PM

Matt didn’t want to see you tonight. But then again, he did. He had to. It was him, Matt Murdock, your boss, who got angry with you today. Not Mike, your savior. 

After you left, Foggy came bursting into Matt’s office yelling at him for snapping at you. Matt remembers he was having an out-of-body experience when Foggy scolded him. 

“She’s… young! She’s learning! She’s great here and you probably made her never want to step foot into this office again!” 

Matt shook his head at the memory, feeling the thought of you claw at his heart. He knows he shouldn’t have yelled at you like that. It didn’t make sense, why was your boss getting so worked up over you putting yourself in danger? He almost exposed himself to you by the way he reacted. If only you knew. If only he told you from the beginning who he was. 

The truth is that his anger came from trauma. He can’t have the same bad things that happened in the past happen to you. He was supposed to protect you from that. 

And tonight, you were likely expecting him, Mike, to come to your rooftop. Regardless, he knew he had to see you. 

He had to. 

⣿⣿⣿⣿

11:00 PM

You woke to a strange, soft tapping on your window. You looked around your room—the door was closed. The lights were off outside, so you knew everyone else retreated to their own rooms. In a daze, you turned your bedside lamp and listened for the tapping again. It was coming from your window, and from there, you saw him. Mike. Crouched on your fire escape, arm resting on his knee. You struggled out of bed and wobbled over to unlock the window. 

“So this is how we’re meeting now?” You asked him in a groggy state. 

“You missed our slot up there,” he said quietly. Starting to become more awake, you let him inside. Mike softly shut the window behind him. 

“You have to be quiet, someone might wake,” you whispered. 

“They’re asleep,” he simply states. “Trust me.” 

You plop onto your bed. He stays standing, a dark silhouette. 

“I’m tired,” you softly speak. “I had a rough day.” 

Mike kneels before you and kisses your knee. He clenches his jaw before he speaks. And when he does, his voice sounds strained. 

“What happened?” 

“I’d rather not talk about it. Just know I fucked up somehow, and I got my ass handed to me,” you explained. Mike dropped his head a little, before looking up at you again, behind that black mask. 

“I can go,” Mike said, taking your hand. “If you’re tired.” 

You don’t reply. You nod your head and slide back under the covers. Mike turns your lamp off for you. You want him to stay. You want him to take that goddamn mask off and join you in your bed. But he stays, towering over you. You sigh into your pillow, feeling the heavy weight of sleep overcome you. You hear him whisper something. 

“I’m sorry.”

And you want to ask him what he’s sorry about, but you’ve already fallen asleep. 

[nicoline1998enilocin]

Luckiest man alive

PAIRING | Ari Levinson x Girlfriend!Female!Reader

WORD COUNT | 1.3K

SUMMARY | You recently started dating Ari, and tonight he's taking you out on a special date. When the two of you are on the date, he can't stop thinking about how he's the luckiest man alive that you're wanting to be with him, especially after everything you've gone through in your life before you met him.

WARNING(S) | This is your official trigger warning. Do not proceed if any of these topics upset you. Age gap [ Reader is in her late 20's, Ari is in his mid to late 30's ], mention of the loss of parents.

A/N | This is the first time I'm writing for this absolute hunk of a man, and I hope you will all enjoy what I did with this one! 🖤

Likes, comments and reblogs will be very much appreciated 💜

Main Masterlist | Ari Levinson Masterlist

Today is your 6 month's anniversary with your boyfriend, Ari, and he has invited you out on a special date, but he didn't specify what the two of you were going to do. All he said is to dress comfortably, and your mind immediately went to the new maxi dress that you got not too long ago. You hadn't had a chance to show it off to him yet, so tonight would be the perfect moment to do so. Since it's a beautiful summer evening you figured it's the perfect time to wear your hair in Dutch braids, and your makeup light to show off your complexion. You finish it with your glasses since Ari complimented you on them a few weeks ago, and your look is done.

Just when you're about to put on your wedges to complete your outfit, you hear a knock on the door and put them to the side to put on when he's inside. ''I'm on my way!'' you say through the door and you hear him chuckle, a deep sound that makes the butterflies in your stomach go crazy. When you open the door, you're greeted by a gorgeously tan, broad-shouldered, long-haired man with the biggest smile he can wear. His outfit fits him well, the shirt clinging onto his body and his muscles just the way you like.

''Hi Gorgeous,'' he says, a big bouquet of your favorite flowers in his hand. ''Hey Handsome,'' you say as you stand on your tiptoes to kiss him, but even then he still has to bend down a bit since he's a lot bigger than you are. ''Happy 6-month anniversary,'' he says, and you can't help but smile at the thought that you have been calling him your boyfriend for six whole months. It felt like yesterday when you accidentally ran into him at the grocery store and dropped your basket. He helped you pick everything up and he sneaked a business card with his number on it into your groceries which you didn't notice until you were at the cash register.

And now here the two of you are, in love and barely able to leave each others sides for longer than 5 minutes. ''Thank you for the beautiful flowers Ari,'' you say as you take them from his hands, your fingers brushing against each other and sending an electric spark through your body. ''I only get the most beautiful flowers for the most gorgeous woman I've ever laid my eyes on,'' he says and you blush so deeply you're surprised your skin doesn't burst into flames. Ari leans down and places a soft kiss on your cheek which only makes it worse.

''Ari, please!'' you say, but in all honesty, you don't want him to stop. You're enjoying every last bit of attention he's giving you, and you're feeling more loved by him than you ever have in your entire life. You lost your parents at a very young age and bounced through the foster care system until you were 18. You were determined to make something of yourself and you did, you went to college and shared a small apartment with one of your classmates who let you live there for free. You got a degree in criminology and managed to get a very decently paying job in the field too.

For years on end you've been independent and didn't have anyone else to take into account too, but it feels good that you have Ari now. The moment the two of you made your relationship official it felt like the last missing piece in the puzzle of your life fell into place. When the flowers are put in a vase and put on your dinner table, you walked over to where he was standing, he walked into your apartment when you were putting the flowers away. ''How's my favorite girl doing today?'' he asks as he envelops you with his big arms, and you wrap yours around his waist as you stand in front of him. ''I would be doing a lot better when I have my shoes on and I'm not so small anymore!'' you joke, and he gets a grin on his face that's only reserved for you.

''Alright, you can put them on and then we will go to your first surprise,'' he says, and as you turned around he put a soft smack on your butt to get you to walk, making you laugh. Everything he does feels so absolutely right like it is meant to be. One day, you can see yourself marrying this man and having a family with him, with at least 3 kids. He doesn't know it yet, but you're sure he will be perfectly okay with that. When you have your shoes on you grab your purse and you're ready to go, but before you can Ari looks you over from head to toe, wondering how he got so lucky.

''I truly am the luckiest man on this earth...'' he mumbles loud enough for you to hear, and it once again makes you blush uncontrollably. ''Stop it!'' you say playfully and you can't stand all the compliments any longer, so you just pull him in for a much-needed hug. ''Thank you for everything these last few months,'' you say into his chest and he just holds on a little tighter. ''You don't need to thank me Gorgeous, I'd do everything all over again if I had the chance because I'm forever grateful to have met you. And to call you my girlfriend, that's just the cherry on top,'' he says and he steps back so he can hold your face in his hands, stroking your cheeks with his big hands.

The two of you look deep into each other's eyes and then he moves in to capture your lips in the softest, sweetest kiss you've ever had the chance to experience. When you pull back you're wearing a huge smile, and the two of you are finally on your way to your first surprise. Since it's such a beautiful summer day outside Ari has arranged for the two of you to have dinner at the beach, to commemorate your first date together. The drive over there isn't too long since you live quite close to it, and before you know it you're already there. ''I am going to need you to close your eyes for me, I want it to be a surprise until we arrive,'' he says and you agree.

He helps you out of the car and slowly walks you to the beach, making sure you won't trip and that everything is safe, and when the two of you arrive he stands behind you, your back to his chest and his hands resting on the top of your arms. ''Open your eyes, Gorgeous,'' is all he says and you do, immediately gasping at the sight before you. At that moment you quickly turn around to make sure it's not a joke, and when you see his face you get tears in your eyes because you feel absolutely special right now. ''Oh god, Ari... This is-'' ''It's perfect,'' he finishes your sentence and all you can do is nod.

''Thank you for everything you've done for me these last 6 months, for making me want to be a better man, for being there for me through good and bad times. Thank you for walking into my life, and thank you for being the love of my life. I love you, Y/N, and if you'll let me, I will show you just how much,'' he says and you're not keeping it dry. You're so happy that tears are escaping your eyes and you just hide your face against his chest, and he wraps his arms protectively around you. ''I love you too, Ari. Thank you for making me see what life is like when you're having someone to share it with,'' you say and when your lips connect again, time appears to stand still, and the moment is never going to end. You two are absolutely in love, and nothing will ever come between the bond you two share.

[unhelpfulfemme]

Halt and Catch Fire is the best show ever and you should watch it if you haven't.

It has amazingly deep and three-dimensional and tender characterizations and a plot that's structured kind of like a spiral, in that you observe the characters over the course of ten years where they keep ending up in similar situations and you can see how much they have or haven't grown since the last time they had to face a similar thing.

It gives you a new appreciation for the wild west days of IT of the 1980s and 1990s, which is something I keep seeing people mention but have actually never experienced on my own unless you count searching for pictures of the W.i.t.c.h. on dial-up and playing some kind of pop the bubble game in 1999.

It has amazing female characters that aren't perfect but also don't have flaws that are sexist stereotypes. The two female leads are an angry punk girl and a hyperfeminine Southern girl and they are both presented as equally competent and given equal importance, even though the hyperfeminine girl gets underestimated a lot in-universe (she has a STEM degree and is as good with computers as the other one, but gets relegated into a "team mum" role a lot).

There is A LOT of focus on friendships and business partnerships and found family - it gives these relationships equal focus to the romances, and they are all realistic and grounded in the characterizations of the leads. In fact, the last episode focuses on the two girls' partnership, not their respective romantic lives. But the romances are amazing too, I have never been invested in a pair so hard the way I currently am in Joe and Cameron, if I weren't bi already they'd be my bisexual awakening. They seem like total opposites but have so, so, many parallels between them, and they have realistically sad backstories that aren't the stock "I was beaten by my mean dad" type. And they have amazing chemistry. And I love how the show is aware of the fact that they need to go outside of their relationship to grow and address their shortcomings because they kind of have the same flaws too, and even though they're still kind of pining after each other they only come back to each other when they're capable of having a stable relationship. This is especially good beacuse the girl is in her early 20s at the beginning and it was so so good to see the show let her grow into her own, on her own, rather than leaving her stuck in an endless back-and-forth with a messed up guy who's her boss and 10 years older than her, but then also respecting the connection they have.

All the characters are realistically flawed, and their flaws come back to bite them in their asses in the end, and the setups for this are strewn across several seasons. And it all makes sense for the character as a whole - for example, the punk girl is rebelling against pretty controlling parenting, but she obviously never learned how to handle relationships except in terms of the dominant person and the one who obeys, so she'd rather live in anarchy and never form any kind of power ladder in the first place. However, when she is forced to do so in order to handle the people who work for her punk IT startup she becomes very autocratic and controlling, and when people try to give her ideas she replies with, "Well, I'm the boss so we'll do what I say."

Why does she do that? Because she obviously doesn't know how to argue constructively. She knows how to a) aggressively overwhelm you, b) get up and leave (as she did to her family) and c) submit (unacceptable).

She does b) to her smarmy yuppie "it's complicated" man who is also one of the main leads - he does something to break her trust, she just abandons him and that's it. But then she gets into a fight with her next boyfriend, and she just assumes that that's it, and he says, "Woah, we're not breaking up, we're just arguing, have you never done that before in your life?"

At the same time, she forms a partnership with the girly girl and the girly girl starts just going around her whenever she hears the "I'm the boss so we'll do as I say" thing because she's frustrated that she has no say in things. This leads to several fallouts because spiral plot structure, and they're all mostly over one of two things: Cameron (punk girl) is being autocratic or Donna (girly girl) is being manipulative. Eventually they run the company into the ground because they can't listen to each other, and the plot always varies which one of them is right and never paints one of them as the 100% villain because they're both being kind of assholes but also deeply sympathetic.. But over the course of all this Cameron kind of learns how to be more functional in her partnerships, which then helps her with both her love interests AND her career. And then other things happen to address and highlight other flaws of hers, and this happens to all of the characters - three marriages fall apart in the course of this show, several companies with really good ideas are run into the ground and a guy commits crimes and then commits suicide because he bought into a Steve Jobs-type bulshitter's cool aid too much.

It has what I'd call great queer rep because one of the leads being a bisexual man is treated very casually and yet the rare instances where homophobia is touched on fit into the rest of his character and backstory so well (he insults a homophobic business partner at some point, and he also has an AIDS scare, and he recalls being bullied at school and how it affected him, and he makes friends with a queer teen because he notices she's like him and that's it). Like, there's an episode where his ex boyfriend comes into the picture and the plot doesn't revolve around them both being men - the plot revolves around his current girlfriend feeling insecure about the guy still having feelings for his ex and coming off as flaky and untrustworthy. The genders of the characters are incidental.

Like seriously this is the best show ever and I don't know why people don't talk about it more, current stuff like The Bear and Succession can only wish to be this nuanced.

[bitchesgetriches]

Hey bitches,

I'm 26, almost 27, and I don't have a savings, IRA, investments, anything. The reason for this is because I was very suicidal for a very long time, so I just didn't see the point of saving or making plans for the future, let alone retirement. I ended up moving back in with my parents because I didn't feel safe living on my own or with people who weren't family. It's only a few months ago that my mental health changed for the better, and ironically, now the fact that I am so far behind everyone else my age causes my depression and anxiety to worsen. Fortunately, finances is something that I know I can do something about, I just... don't know where to start.

Currently, I'm busy paying off student loans, so while I have a savings account, I don't put much into it. My job is fantastic in regards to work environment and coworkers and validating that I'm good at something - it definitely helped me find a will to live again - but it doesn't have benefits and it pays far below the national average for this position. I know finding a new job will help the money + moving out front and maybe even the IRA thing, because don't a lot of employers match what you put in there? But I'm admittedly reluctant/scared to job hunt again, because the jobs I had before this one were horrible and made my mental health issues even worse. I have a Bachelor's degree and everything, but since I was so suicidal all throughout university and up until a few months ago, I just... didn't bother looking into internships or anything, so this is my first job in my actual field. I don't know if it's bad to stay at a job that doesn't have benefits or pay too well while I'm still getting my feet under me and figuring out what life is like when you actually, you know, want to live it. And I know that you are not mental health professionals, so I don't know if you have any input there or not.

But generally speaking, when it comes to finances, I'm just... Not sure where I'm supposed to be. How much should a 26/27 year old have saved? Or in an IRA? Or in investments? And how do you balance all those things while paying for yourself to live on your own? Is it bad to stay somewhere that you know pays well below the national average while you're still figuring this life thing out, and then job search again later, when you feel steadier? Or is that shooting yourself in the foot?

I know this is a lot. Like I said, I'm kind of starting from zero in my late-20s pretty much, so... I don't even know where to start or what to focus on. Retirement, maybe? No idea. But any input/advice/articles you want to share would be greatly appreciated.

Thank you so much for all that you do!

Honeybee... we are SO gd proud of you for staying alive. True--we're not mental health professionals! But we understand mental health struggles and how drastically they can affect your finances. So this is your official permission to forgive yourself for falling behind on money achievements while you were literally battling your own brain for the will to live. That is HUGE. You survived. Don't feel any guilt for that.

Next, stop thinking in terms of where you "should be" at your age. You're starting late by society's standards, and that's society's problem, not yours. Here is our advice on where to get started right now, at your stage regardless of age:

The Financial Order of Operations: 10 Great Money Choices for Every Stage of Life