#oof i spent a long time on this

[witchhazelevesque]

There's something about the change and progression from Leo's hesitancy to rescue Nico because it would definitely be a trap to his willingness to go back for Calypso and all the ways his death is involved in that journey.

And I don't even mean progression as in Leo's stance on Nico influenced his decision about Calypso- though that could have been a really satisfying way to take that. But they are at the core the same situation: a rescue mission, with vastly different circumstances.

(I don't like romantic ca/eo, but them as friends? Sign me up. That's the only way I can imagine them, and what I mean when I talk about them here.)

The situation sometimes gets boiled down to 'Leo and Jason wanted to leave Nico in the jar', but there's more to it . For one thing, Leo wasn't even able to voice all his thoughts on the matter, because he was interrupted by Hazel, Frank and Jason. That doesn't negate the overall suspicion/wariness Leo has; he brings up two major points: that the giants are using Nico to bait a trap for the rest of them and that Nico hid the camps from one another. But Leo was surprised by Frank and Hazel’s reaction and question about whether Leo meant they should leave Nico. So, it seems in part 'can we trust him?', but also in part something like, 'this is a trap, we should be aware of that and be on the defensive when doing it'.

Leo's actions later also factor into this, though they were mainly for Hazel's benefit. He wanted to use Nemesis's deal to save Nico. And in a way, this decision is more reckless and dangerous than any ways death was involved in going back for Calypso. And in a way, more romantic, which is kind of funny because it could be interpreted for either Hazel or Nico. That aside, this offer was voluntary and unconnected to Leo’s other duties.

But his decision to die was connected to those duties. It wasn’t dependent on Calypso. He didn’t do it for her. Yes, he does think about how he feels his place is with her and not the rest of the seven, but that’s not the only reason. Even without her in the picture, he was going to sacrifice himself. He died because the Fates put a choice in front of him. He died to defeat Gaea, to spare Jason, to save all his friends and the world.

And to avenge his mother.

Yes, his decision to go back to Ogygia without first letting his friends know he’d be okay is not fair to them, but RR was always gonna make it happen this way, which I'll get into in a second. But working with what is here, I do understand Leo's decision. Leo explains this best when he says, "Calypso is a priority”. It’s plausible that they'd want the other to be a little selfish about them / want to be a little selfish about each other. To prioritize them. This could have been something they connected over, and it would have been cathartic for this to have played a larger role. To choose one another.

And maybe that makes more sense if you look at it in a vacuum, without the context of how their interactions were executed and just the overall shape of their intended dynamic in the story: both isolated and alone, brought together by someone else's design, connecting regardless. Someone who never felt chosen wanting to make sure someone he cared for does feel chosen after waiting so long both to be the first choice and to have her freedom.

And that might not be compelling to everyone, but it is small in comparison to the actual major reason I understand Leo’s decision to prioritize Calypso: because it’s about fulfilling the plot, not about characterization.

Which may seem obvious because these books are about fast paced plot, but it matters so much here. I would say RR wrote himself into a corner, but I don't think he actually minded being there.

But it was still a corner.

It parallels Zeus saying that Hera bringing the seven together wove fate in a way that only left so many avenues open.

It was pretty clear by the end that RR did not care about the quality of finishing the quest, since another line of the prophecy, ‘the world must fall’ was built up so much and then the final battle between ‘fire’ and ‘the world’ took six pages.

Six pages.

RR just got it done. 

The choice to have Leo's trip back to Ogygia happen at this moment ultimately is about tying up loose ends of the prophecy. Prophecy has always been made clear by the end of each book in this verse, iirc. Leo's characterization basically turned into just him thinking about Calypso, which is disappointing. But it feels, at least to me, that Leo only left before talking to his friends because it was a lynchpin for those plot requirements of the prophecy, and because RR wanted the situation the other characters ended the series in to be ✨dramatic and mysterious✨

Sort of a benefit, we at least get to see Hazel and Frank deliver the news (one of the few things they got to do in BoO).

It's also strange that Leo set the timer for 24 hours the night before the battle, maybe it was because he couldn't have anticipated Zeus sending them back to New York so fast, maybe he thought the battle with Gaea might last longer. But it was set to resurrect him long after he died and Festus flew him from camp. Leo heard Asclepius say to administer the cure as soon after death as possible. Maybe Leo didn’t know what would happen, but RR did and he set it up this way. If this time detail had stayed the same but Leo didn’t leave for Ogygia right then, I wonder how that would play out. If he hadn't gone, would the others have taken his body off Festus? Would they have been able to find where he’d put the cure? (That’s a bit of a tangent though.)

The details of how it actually worked are never addressed to maintain the ✨mystique✨ around what Leo’s plan actually was. BUT it could have made a big difference in the reception of the end of the novel if something had been explicitly set up earlier, and that’s if Leo would have needed a massive power source to 'break out of reality' so to speak, to kick start his return to Ogygia, since it doesn't exist in the real world. When Percy ended up there, it was during Mt St Helens' erupting and Hera guided his way. Leo's first trip was powered by another goddess.

And what a convenient power source he had in himself, his body turning molten, releasing everything inside himself, this literal gift and burden from the god of fire, in a genuinely once in a lifetime event- because it was so powerful it literally killed him, created an explosion strong enough to vaporize a primordial deity. It would have been a now or never situation, when else was he going to have the power of a force of nature except the one he has inside of himself?

It's one possibility that wasn’t taken.

Maybe if this had been the case and had been explained beforehand, this plot point would have been more palatable.

But then it also could have supported the idea that Leo did die for Calypso. But it didn’t actually happen this way.

However, a driving force that is known for sure is the oath with a final breath line that RR needed to get done.

Having Leo fulfill the oath with his final breath, when he died, was necessary to deliver on everything the story had been promising. It checked off the last item in the central prophecy of the series. Prophecies have been a focal point of each book in all the PJOverse and having the meaning unfold and come to fruition plays a major role, think Rachel literally crash landing into the Battle of Manhattan to tell Percy he wasn’t the hero in the prophecy.

So, with the way HoO and BoO are written, the only piece of the prophecy missing after Leo defeats Gaea is the ‘oath to keep with a final breath’. It didn’t matter if it made sense or not, if it was a good idea or not, if it was in character or not, the oath being kept had to happen in this moment. Leo had to go back for Calypso right then. It was the plot bending the character, not the character driving the plot, which, I mean, isn't too surprising, these books aren't really deep dives into the characters.

Back to the original topic though, Leo was in very different head spaces with different circumstances in these two rescue missions. He had to take into account the safety of the entire crew and the quest when considering Nico, and when he did decide to take a risk, it was one that would only put himself on the line. With Calypso, he knew he was going to die one way or another, that in doing so he would complete the quest, and that he had to keep his oath 'with a final breath', which, again, is a narrative point that needed to be checked off. There were already multiple plot lines that didn't pay off (Frank bringing his family full circle happened off screen within six pages a g a i n Hazel's curse being washed away wasn’t explained satisfactorily, etc.) but this one had top billing, RR couldn't get away with not delivering.

Again, a plot choice, not a characterization one. RR had to write it that way because of the choices he'd already made.

This got very far away from my original thought of valdangelo pining with Nico cycling through some of these thoughts while waiting for Leo to get back to camp. Him thinking "you wouldn't do it for me, but you would for her.”

And if that was the case, then Leo dying- which would have been an extreme version of one of his worries about rescuing Nico- would make more sense as a point of contention between Nico and Leo in ToA. Maybe Nico would logically recognize all the reasons aside from Calypso that Leo sacrificed himself, but he couldn't get his feelings to understand the difference.

[crazymecjc]

YEAH TUMBLR IS HOMOPHOBIC TOWARDS US😔 and I am THIS CLOSE but I also have no friends so 🫡

HHH YEAH. ph ended with break going home🥺

what am I then 🫡😔 /j /j

also this is the true canon ph ending mochijun told me herself

[guinevereslancelot]

so proud of myself for putting a big part of my last paycheck in my savings like an adult but now im gonna spend all my savings like an idiot 😵‍💫

[chloelouygo]

I bought a linkin park cd today and my mum has already stolen it for her car-

[the-yearning-astronaut]

Me: just trying to work on projects for work so can actually say I've done something at the team meeting tomorrow

My brain: sleepy.... Nap time? Time to get cozy. It's beddy time! Look at your warm, soft pets sleeping next to you. Don't you wish that were you rn?

My body: Your eyelids are getting heaaavvvvy and your brain is foggier than a haunted house attraction. You should listen to it. Close your eyes, just for a second. Just rest.

Brain: How about a nice, short catnap to boost your energy. Only been up for 2hrs you say? That's ok! time is relative and you deserve a nap at any time. You'll feel more rested and energetic if you just take 20 minutes and have a nice little doze, promise...

Body: your movements are slow and clumsy and you'd feel so much better if you just lay down and close your eyes. Just for a minute.

Brain: if you don't take a nap in the next 10 minutes I'm gonna start screaming at you via migraine and force you to take one.

[arts-i-enjoy]

Something I've noticed from subbing to just a couple of very small patreons (like fewer than 50 members) is how SHY people are about talking to the creator that they are paying! What's up with that? I wonder if it's because most of these patrons come via tumblr, where there is the culture of talking in the tags/reblogs and comments being your "outdoor voice"/basically it being RUDE to talk to people.

I think that's fucked up, especially in the context of artists (just to be clear every time I say artists that is inclusive of writers). Like these are people that are making a thing and showing it to you, they don't just want silent nods of approval by way of reblogs/likes. They want FEEDBACK. They want CONNECTION. I think a fundamental part of creating and sharing art is the goal of connection. And I don't think people realize how truly disheartening it is to post something and then get completely silent likes/reblogs.

For the love of God they are TALKING TO YOU. TALK BACK!!!!

[wolves-etc]

thoughts on The Last Of Us episode five, largely in the order I had them:

[thoughts on: 1.1 | 1.2 | 1.3 | 1.4 | X | 1.6 | 1.7 | 1.8 | 1.9]

— kathleen is setting off all the alarm bells I haven't used since high school for sharp snipey girls who aren't safe to talk to. except she's killing people. which is somewhat worse.

— if these are henry and sam then oh gosh henry is sweet with sam

— so this show shows us two ppl holding joel and ellie at gunpoint and then immediately goes "no it's okay they're really sweet! it's superhero face paint for bravery reasons! you'll love them." AND I DO

— "that's just how he sounds, he has an asshole voice. joel, tell him he's okay." "everything is great." "fuck!"

— new cracking ground theory: maybe they didn't clear the tunnels of infected; maybe the infected just bunched together to slowly force a way out.

— I would love to know how kathleen won her lieutenant's loyalty. what she actually changed that he approved so much of.*

— okay this is critical of me so feel free to skip it but: a jumbo infected who not only sounds very different to all the others but moves slower - slower even than the little old lady who broke something trying to get at joel at the beginning - is not only less scary but a bit more in the realm of the fantastical than I expected. I get the miniboss vibe but it would be more in line with the others if he were just a regular infected but bigger - still those unnatural sharp movements, still that distinctive very scary sound, kinda maintaining the brand they've shown us so far, y'know? instead we kinda have a generic fantasy troll thing, and to my mind that's a shame.

— it's really nice to see ellie playing and bonding with a kid though.

— …oh no.

— fuck.

~

* after talking with a friend and checking the transcripts, I realised that what kathleen probably did to win her people's loyalty was orchestrating the assault to take the area from fedra after they killed her brother. she isn't a charismatic leader (I think that's part of what she meant when she said she wasn't beautiful like her brother), but a victory like that could win her a lot of respect.

and her interactions with her second in command - perry - still surprise me. it's a little bit of a queen-and-loyal-knight dynamic: she trusts him with her weaknesses and worries, he stays unquestioningly faithful - and more or less even dies for her in the end. and I could see him being a decent leader of militia types. it could also be that the others follow her because they follow and trust him.

[rahabs]

Every time I post a fic I lose subscribers these days, which is honestly vaguely depressing.

[sweetlesson]

{Also since I'm here and thinking about this... Actually, I'm going to put this under a cut since it might be considered negative and triggering to some.}

{When I first started this blog I tried really hard to like, reach out as much as possible? I liked every interaction call I saw and sent in every meme I could and even tried to make extra posts of my own to reach as many people as possible. But actually, that's... Not how I normally behave?}

{I was trying really hard to reach out to people first because I felt like it would be really rude to make a blog for people to follow and then just... Not be the first to reach out? Just do nothing? I didn't want to do that to anyone. But I'm also like incredibly anxious and I've found even with perma starter calls I still get really worried that I'm spamming interactions or I'm interacting with someone that actually doesn't like me or my writing all that much and only interacts with me out of pity? Like I know that thought process is so stupid, but unless someone has gone out of their way to interact with me multiple times and carried out threads with me for a while or even to their end, I usually feel like that person must actually only tolerate me at best.}

{And I've been doing my best to fight against that mindset because logically I know that isn't the case and it's actually ridiculous of me to be afraid of people especially when 90% of you guys followed me first, like I know I'm not being rational. But when I consider interacting with things or trying to reach out to someone it gives me the sweats and heart palpitations and a lot of the time I decide nah, I'll try again later when it's more appropriate, even not knowing what more appropriate even looks like to me.}

{All of that to say that if you ever want to interact with me for any reason and we're mutuals? Please just do it. Please just send me something because that will make me feel so much better about sending you stuff in the future, too. I'm sorry I am this way. I realize I'm not being very polite. I really apologize to make anyone make the first move with me, since I know quite literally from experience that that sucks really bad. I'll try to be better in the future, but until then just bother me with literally anything you want at literally any point you want because that legitimately helps me be more comfortable, I promise.}

{And if we're not mutuals and you want to interact? Follow me! I'll check your rules and see if we line up alright.}

[mouseonvenus-main]

I only ever posted like two of these but in honor of the new year I'm forcing you to look at my 2022 art compilation

[Image description: a collage of 31 digital and traditional drawings of original characters and fanart. End ID]

[themoonunderstoodmydadjokes]

..

[floral-hex]

going through old letters and cards today to see what I can throw away, mail I received when I lived in New York and never remembered to go through again until now, and I kept finding a) old school photos of my brothers, & b) letters my youngest brother wrote to me while I lived away from home, and… oof. I’m glad no one was around because I criiiiiiieeeeed so hard. Had to step away for awhile.

[voidhope]

The Other Woman

(Part 2 FINALE)

—

Synopsis: Miguel had left Y/N for another version of his old wife in hopes of getting his old life back. To only realize the mistakes he’s made.

Link to Part 1

Pair: Miguel O’Hara x Spider!reader

Warnings: very heavy mental health, ANGST LIKE A LOT OF ANGST, ALL OF THIS IS ANGST, mentions of death/almost dying, long term establish relationship, cheating, swearing, therapy, physical fight, blood, feral protective miguel?

—

A/N: hello again! this one is more heartbreaking and longer than the first part oof… Very low dialog up until closer towards the end! wanted to just get through telling the story itself and the emotions. It’s just a very heavy storyline!! I want to say thank you so so much for showing so much support for part 1 i had no idea it would receive that much attention :O !! i wrote this out kinda fast as i didn’t want to loose the momentum of the idea. so apologies for any mistakes! all feedback is greatly appreciated ~

—————————————————

You used to make Miguel coffee everyday, with one cream two sugars, and he would nag about how he hated the taste. It was to your liking, not his. As you would sneakily take sips out of his mug while working next to him. Why didn’t you just get your own coffee? You claimed you could never finish it and just wanted a taste out of his. Miguel would roll his eyes at you every time he caught you but he adored it. He had secretly grown to love the way you made it and had become his only way of making coffee after meeting you.

Now as this version of his older wife made it the way he is suppose to like coffee, bland and straight, he found himself bothered by it. Going as far to correct her even though this was what he had been claiming to have missed so much. He was now seeing himself teaching someone else how to love him like you did…

He was only a shell of the man he was when he had Gabriella. Even though the copy of his old wife has her same personality, the relationship couldn’t be exactly how it was before because he had changed so much. You had helped him become whole again. His tastes and likings had all switched to everything about you. The charm he found in his old wife doesn’t hold a light to you now and he was getting frustrated. He had wanted this so badly. He felt like those babies who whine and cry wanting to eat a lemon and once they get their way they realize the sour truth.

Miguel never truly realized what it was like to loose you until three weeks after he told you the truth. Over the years the idea of losing you terrified him but he only ever thought of it being in death. He never considered separation when everything was perfect for both of you then. There were times he believed that you were made just for him and he treated you like his queen. Which you truly were to him in his spider society. Why would he ever throw that away? Look at what he did.

He gave himself every excuse in the book before you knew he was cheating on you. ‘This is only for research.’ he would think every time he found himself back in that universe. As everyone knew he was so serious about his work, obviously this is just him getting to know more about certain universes and canons. Lyla was the only one seeing straight through him knowing where he was actually going. Things kept tumbling and the more he found out about the place and spent time with her the more his grief and yearning returned. It was all just there, so reachable.

There was a time his mind tried to snap him back out of it while cheating on you and made him realize the guilt. The first time he kissed this woman you were there in his mind. He came home right after and held you without saying a word. You never questioned him, just showed him comfort as much as you could. Lightly stroking his back, you never over stepped or pushed him when he was vulnerable with you. He only closed his eyes and held onto you tighter processing how you were always too good for him. He was converting to living two different lives; his old self during the day and then coming home to you. He didn’t want to let go of either at the time.

Once he found out he could safely have Gabriella again was when he became distant with you. The shame of using you for research made him become stoic. He didn’t want to admit how wrong he was treating you. All while you were always being so loyal and trusting towards him. Things were slowly slipping through the cracks and he knew he couldn’t up keep it. He wished he could have had that conversation with you so much differently but it was over. Now he had his old life back, a dream he had his mind set on.

He ignored the shakiness in his hands when he returned to her after letting you go. ‘It’s all for the best.’ is what he would repeat in his mind as a mantra. His new girlfriend truly had no idea who he really was or what his background was. Miguel continued to feed her lies to the point where he even started believing them himself getting too lost in avoiding what he’s done. He believed he was happy as he spent time with her.

When she got too close to finding the truth after finding his wedding ring in one of his pockets, he set her off course from it by revealing his spider identity and taking her to HQ. This was the day that everything felt like it was crashing around him. Being reminded of his marriage, having to face his friends with his new lover, sharing his personal spider life, his work with someone who wasn’t you. He excused himself rushing to an unused office room while his chest was tightening. Pupils dilating as he realized it was his first time having a panic attack.

Nevertheless he continued to push it all aside and act completely normal with his girlfriend. He was feeling your absence the most while working. You had became an extension of him. He had trained you from scratch and you helped him build this society he has now. You knew the ins and outs of everything and fought perfectly alongside him. Now that he was on his own he let his girlfriend be there for him when he got stressed, but there always was a knot in his stomach he never could get rid of.

The more his mental health ate at him late at night the more he considered searching out for you. There was no closure between both of you and he never got to listen to how you feel. What was your opinion on all that happened? Do you hate him?

He wanted to speak with someone so badly but he dug himself in a hole too deep. You were gone, he was lying through his teeth to this poor woman he’s kept for some fantasy, he felt too ashamed to say anything to his friends, he would rather die if all his workers found out how big of a piece of shit he is. Anytime Lyla tried peeping a word that wasn’t work related he would snap. He had pushed everyone away and now he just felt alone.

Regardless he would wake up in the morning and swallow all his dark feelings. He would remember his grief of when he lost his family and it would put him back in the moment. He has another chance. He was happy with the direction he was going in now.

Right?

—

The day he found out you were at HQ he felt his heart stop. He was mid mission trying to call for Lyla but she wouldn’t answer. Frustrated he tried looking into what was happening only to see her busy having a conversation with you. It felt like something took over him when he opened a portal in less than a second. Without thinking nor wasting a heartbeat he rushed back. Just a glimpse of you, maybe just to hear a word out of your mouth. The feeling of having you back in HQ was making him ignore all his insecurities. How he would coward at the thought of trying to reach out to you before. You were in his home, your home, and the thought drove him wild.

You were already long gone though. Lyla stared at him not saying a word. The quietness in the room making his ears ring but his thoughts were screaming in his head. He stood there frozen still trying to recollect himself. He was the one that left you, what is wrong with him?

Again he went back and forth in his own head trying to convince himself ‘You wanted this.’ but if he did why is he feeling like someone just killed a puppy in front of him? Why is he here fighting with his self if this is really his dream? Why did he try chasing after you? The wounds of his past grief were too deep. He never took the time to properly heal and now look at what he’s become.

“Miguel, what’s this?” He was startled turning around seeing his girlfriend holidng your watch and skimming through the divorce paperwork addressed to him.

There was no more hiding, no more lying. He swallowed hard even though his throat was dry. He let everything he had kept away rise to surface. It hurt him to see the beautiful face his old wife shared contort into such anger and pain while finding the truth.

She didn’t stay, but for some reason he wasn’t upset. Though he longed for his daughter, he knew it would have never been the same now. He finally closed the door on his past. His heart had made the choice this time but it’s too late. Now grasping onto the divorce papers left by you, emptiness spread through his soul.

—

You on the other hand did not find yourself crying by yourself on a rooftop for long. The shift in the air from your arrival alerted the local spider-man immediately.

“It didn’t work out, did it?” He crouched down next to you as he noticed your watch gone and your missing wedding band.

Peter Parker knew both you and Miguel. Your husband had come to do many rounds of research in this universe when he took you. Eventually offering this Peter a spot in the society, which he politely declined due to just being busy enough here. You both never spoke much but always had an appreciation for each other.

“Do you need a place to crash at?” He continued while trying to get you to look at him. Reaching his hand towards you.

You had absolutely no one and you had been gone so long you couldn’t even go back to the little you had. When you met Miguel you didn’t hesitate to never look back and now it filled you with regret. How naive were you to put all your trust and reliance on him.

You took Peter’s hand. You were ready to start your own life and be your own person now.

—

Peter Parker was nice enough to let you stay with him as long as you needed it. You both had became ‘besties!’ as he would love to poke at you. The first month with him you were a disaster really but he showed you how he liked to cope using his spider abilities.

The first thing he helped you with was getting a new suit. Your old one resembled too much to Miguel’s and you felt suffocated every time you put it on. Peter had taught you to use your current emotional pain on whichever sad little villain was making trouble out in Brooklyn that night.

“Come on, we got multiverse spider-woman helping me keep these streets clean now!” He would taunt at the men while watching you easily take them out a little bit too aggressively. His feet kicking up and down while he sat on the side of a building watching you. The crime rate did go down a bit once word got around how strong your punch was. Peter’s just happy he can now spend some nights to himself.

You got yourself a job at the mart on the corner to help cover bills for Peter and save up. You were grateful enough the owners never batted an eye when you would disappear during a shift to either suddenly go cry uncontrollably or beat the shit out of someone at a nearby robbery. Next thing you were enrolling yourself back in university, wanting to finish that degree you never did.

It wasn’t too long that some of your older spider friends would stop by to check in on you. Seeing them was difficult sometimes, you were internally itching to ask about Miguel. Things were going okay for you on a very slow path of breathing step by step. You never wanted to feel that hurt again and so you very well pretend like Miguel didn’t exist if you could.

You couldn’t ignore the hurt resurfacing when you passed couples on the street. Or when you found yourself going to fidget with your wedding ring just to remember it’s gone. You can’t just move on from a relationship that was so deeply apart of you and lasted so long. You gave everything to him and it will take you much time to get yourself to build trust again.

After two semesters, you finally had your graduation. All the things you learned while in Earth-928 paid off as you barley had to study. Passing top of the class, you immediately got an offer for an internship opportunity with Alchemax and was able to get an introduction tour of the building beforehand.

What you hadn’t realized was that Alchemax had been looking for that girl who snuck into their offices a couple years ago. Who made another dimension’s spider appear and then went missing herself soon after. They had kept as close tabs on you as they could and how foolish you were to think your little break in wouldn’t come back to bite you. The moment you stepped foot back in their building, it was over for you.

—

Miguel had spent a whole year in much deserving therapy. Nothing could stop the embarrassment he felt when Peter B signed him up with HQ’s best spider-therapist after 3 months of constant out bursts. No one could come near the man when he felt like he had lost everything. Those first initial months were difficult for everyone around him.

Therapy did help, he hates to admit it, but it was a very rough ride. He finally was able to understand his deep inner term oil and heal his issues but moving on from you? No, he could never.

You were the only one who had sincerely stood by his side, always rooting for him. He never fell out of love with you despite of everything that he did. He just pushed everything down too deep and was blinded by obsession. Till now he could never deny that he still loves you. Maybe if he just would have went to therapy years ago instead of acting out on unsolved grief none of this would have happened. The guilt always making him toss and turn at night.

He would have big temper tantrums when he would find his coworkers going to visit you time to time and not sharing any details. He needed to know if you’re okay. Did you already move on? He longed to find you and speak with you but he knew he wasn’t ready yet. He was so self destructive and this was what he deserved.

Everyone avoided him completely when he overheard someone saying you were living with Peter Parker. Fighting crime with him and having a cute little home life. Peter followed you around now like a puppy. Miguel did not take the news well at all. Let’s just say, the large bill replacement for his monitor screens was what snapped him out of that rage.

He also wanted to strangle Hobie Brown every time he saw a glint in his eye when your name was mentioned around. Yet Miguel couldn’t hate the kid either, as Hobie was one of the people to try help repair the damage he did to you. How badly he just wanted to hold you and shield you in his arms from any other people taking you from him as if he wasn’t the idiot to let you go in the first place.

Everyone’s big, powerful, scary boss was really just a grumpy, wallowing-in-self-pity, sensitive, lonely man now. Mention your name too much to him and watch him start crying or take it out on whatever he could find nearest to him. He would some nights scroll through your wedding photos while listening to your last tracked log with Lyla. Your words cutting through him deep like long sharp knives. How he urged to go tell you it was all wrong and how guilty he was for making you feel like this.

Despite it all, he still believed in being the best of the best. He used his work to distract himself from his sorrows, to become numb. Even though his divorce paperwork were set next to him on his desk to remind him the pain. He never signed it.

—

“We can’t tell him!” Jessica gritted through her teeth. Small group of spider-people were hovered around Lyla taking in the new found information.

“Her canon events have always been uncertain, we can’t just stop and fix this one?” Gwen Stacy suggested in hopes.

“We have never prevented a canon event of hers or the people involved in it. It could be even more dangerous than a regular canon.” Peter B spoke grimly.

“When ‘as danger ever stopped us?” Hobie spoke up.

“Everyone get your gear.” Lyla added to the stress of the situation.

—

You couldn’t open your eyes properly with a strong blinding light being held above you. Arms and legs secured on top of a metal surgical table. You could feel the warmth of blood scattered on certain parts of your body, slowly starting to dry. It was a mix of yours and the people you had tried fighting through to get out of here when you realize the trap you were reeled into. Different people in lab coats poked and pried all around you while you were tied. Your mask was thrown on another table and your suit had large gashes across it.

Soon you also could feel the presence of Peter Parker being brought to the room, thrown slumped in the corner breathing heavily. They had gotten you too good. They knew everything and had planned this so detailed.

“Now you’re going to help me open the multiverse.” Kingpin loomed around you. All you could feel was searing pain as a laser aimed right at your chest.

—

Miguel was already staring out the window to the glowing night lights of Nueva York when he saw a big hole appear in sight of the skyline. His eyebrows furrowed while he was trying to process what he was looking at. It wasn’t a second later when all alarms started going off in his office.

“Qué carajos?” He exclaimed seeing the alerts of a possible universe collapse. “Lyla! Why wasn’t this being taken care of already?”

“I already sent people.”

“Then what are they doing?” He yelled. His confusion and anger only furthered when he saw a red alarm for a canon event.

“Canon event?” He whispered to himself. He always knew when these were happening, there were none scheduled for today. There was no way he would let one passed him, it’s not like this could magically appear? His jaw dropped in realization… a new canon event.

“Lyla, tell me the truth. Why wasn’t this reported to me?” He made the atmosphere turn cold. She knew he already figured it out.

“A new canon event was received this morning being given to Peter Parker. Of Y/N L/N’s death.” The words from Lyla made Miguel’s body go still. His eyes raced side to side while he processed it.

“No!” He roared, a fist slamming into the nearby desk. His massive strength breaking it in half.

“Boss, you can’t go on this mission only using your emotions.” Lyla warned. However Miguel was already half way stepping through a portal to find you.

He appeared, watching his team struggle to shut down the machine causing the collapse. Outnumbered by the amount of Alchemax puppets. A different kind of rage filled him as he saw you, for the first time in a year, suffering. Miguel was never one to act reckless while on missions but he had no plan here and just ran off the pure adrenaline the fight or flight had hit him with.

His claws tore into the backs of his enemies as he jumped beast-like across the room. Not hesitating spilling blood across the wall while he took everyone down as fast as he could. His team could only watch wide eye with an unsettling fear as they saw Miguel lose himself to his spider sense. While he fought they took the opportunity to take apart the machine.

Miguel was panting heavily, pupils blown wide glowing red, and fangs dripping with venom as the room slowly silenced. Kingpin laid on the floor slowly trying to drag himself after being beaten to a pulp. It was over. Peter B stopped him from doing anything further. Knowing Miguel would kill the man, Peter B let the team finish up to give Kingpin to authorities. Miguel turned frantically to look at you seeing the other spiders step away. Peter Parker was hunched over you in tears. Miguel fought the urge to snap at Peter and grab his hands off of you.

Your vision was too blurry and everything felt like it was burning. A shape that seemed too familiar came into your peripheral vision and you tried to push yourself up.

“Miguel?” Was the last thing you croaked before slumping back passing out. Miguel catching you in his arms before you could hurt yourself further.

“It’s her time.” Jessica spoke behind him. Yet he was refusing to let go. He had never defied the way the timeline worked since he created his society. He would never break the rules and you both had promised each other before not to. If there was a situation like this you both agreed to save the universe first. How stupid was he to think he would listen to that now facing it in-front of him.

He never got to tell you what happened. He never got to apologize. He never got to tell you one more time that he loved you. Even if you in result just spat in his face, at least he was able to talk to you one more time. You were never a placeholder or someone to fill a hole in his heart. His whole heart belonged to you and he couldn’t let you go thinking you didn’t mean anything to him. No matter the consequences, he needed to tell you.

“Call all the teams to control the damage of a possible universe collapse.” He turned to Jess with Y/N tightly in his arms. The spider-people watched speechless as he opened a portal and disappeared.

—

—

—

—

—

—

—

—

—

Two weeks you laid motionless in the HQ’s medbay.

The clean up after breaking the canon was a little intense. They were able to get it under control as the event started to fade from your timeline once you were returned and starting to heal in Earth-928.

The spider society would remain silent near the medbay. The lights always being dimmed and hushed whispers between staff to not bother the distressed O’Hara. He refused to leave.

Your Peter Parker had now joined the team, much to Miguel’s dismay. Everyday your friends would come in and check to see how you were. Some telling stories about their day or any gossip updates you missed, in hopes that it would get you to wake up. They would ignore the gloomy Miguel who was basically glued to the seat next to you not saying a word to anyone.

At night Miguel would play with your fingers and softly stroke your hair all while pleading “Please don’t leave me, please don’t leave me. Por favor mi alma.” He knew it wasn’t his place to beg this after what he did, but he didn’t mind the words falling on deaf ears.

Miguel hadn’t eaten in days, he felt too nauseous from anxiety to even try anything. Pavitr had done the favor to bring you and Miguel’s favorite empanadas from a small street vendor downtown. Hoping to get Miguel to at least try the food before he ended up in a hospital bed next to you due to starvation.

You started to blink open your eyes, spots surrounding your vision. You could hear a soft breathing to your right side and you slowly felt your sense come back one by one. It felt like you just had a really rough nap.

“Oh my god that smells so good.” You moaned, sitting yourself up to try to look at where the smell of food was coming from.

You were met with a wide eyed Miguel holding a box of empanadas. His jaw slacked open acting as if he’s seen a ghost looking at you. Confusion hit you first for a second and then you start to panic.

Why was he here? Why was your ex-husband sitting right here? You started to push away from him and Miguel caught on to your panic.

“No, no, no mi amor stop.” He tried calming you. “You’re hurt, you’re going to open your stitches.”

You suddenly remembered everything that happened right before you blacked out. At that moment you forgot the hurt you had towards your ex-lover. Gathering yourself you just stared at him. “I’m suppose to be dead.”

Tears rimmed your eyes. Why did it feel like life just hated you so much?

Miguel engulfed you in his arms as you started to cry. You didn’t care right now. You had ached for this feeling again, so alone, with the comfort Miguel used to bring you. Just for a moment you could pretend like how it was before.

“We can’t do this Miguel.”

He knew what you were thinking. He didn’t want to let you leave his arms yet, as he let his self hold harder and push your head closer into his the crook of his shoulder. The tickle of your breath on his neck, he just wanted this forever.

“She left. Almost a year ago.” He let out to you. A big weight coming off of his chest. You pulled back from him and looked up into his eyes while you watched him avoid your gaze. You felt bad to say you could feel a bit of satisfaction bubbling in you.

“Good, she deserved better.”

“So did you.” Miguel sighed playing with his hands. Your eyes widened when you saw the ring still on his finger. He let you stare. “I-I could never. I couldn’t.” The emotions struggle to come out of his mouth. You understood him though. You always did. Placing your hand on top of his you just nodded.

“Please stay here.” He whispered.

Miguel had broken you in so many ways. Yet he almost ruined another universe just to keep you alive. You both needed time to talk and coming out a coma right now isn’t good timing.

“I finally became my own person when I went back in my universe. I enjoyed my independence.” The words pelleted at him. He could only hold his breath as he waited for you to continue. “I’ll stay… but not for you.”

It wounded him deeply; but he deserved it. This place will always be a home for you even if he wasn’t apart of it. Before he can tear his gaze and turn away, you reached out to hold his face close to yours. Your fingers gently rubbing on his cheeks as you slowly look at him properly after so long. You let your thumb smooth over his frown lines and he leaned into your touch closing his eyes.

“Let’s give us time.” Was the words you blessed that opened every door of hope he could find. He would take it, he would absolutely take it. He has to fight for you, he has to prove to you. He would do anything but for now he’ll be on his best patiently waiting for you.

Both of you sat comfortably without speaking, only the faint background beeps of the hospital monitor making up for the silence, while passing small glances. For once both of you felt a missing warmth you didn’t realize you needed. Sharing empanadas with each other, just maybe it will be alright…

—————————————————

The end!!! Thank you so so much for your time in reading my story. i really really was so happy with all the comments and feedback on pt 1 it really meant a lot!!!

i hope this was ok ~ i apologize for how long it was i was thinking of doing another part but just wanted to finish this up. I was in such a conflict how to end this. i hope it wasn’t too cliche or anything i’m just a sucker for very wanty needy dramatic stories. It’s a hopeful ending tho~ i couldn’t pick with just happy or sad.

So many of you had tons of amazing suggestions which I appreciated so much. I was such a mess trying to figure it all out. Many of you wanted to see Y/N move on with another person but I ended up going this route. I used Peter Parker as an obv character in y/n’s universe but it’s not tied to any specific one and you guy can think of him more to your liking if you want to!

If any of you would like a small drabble or imagine of another route of this story or just anything angsty/possessive and rarwrarwbarkbark miguel. I’d be glad to help lol!! My request box is wide open~ i had so much fun writing this!

—

TAG LIST!

@hoseokslefteyebrow @sleepyamaya @typicalife-101 @jenniferdixon05207 @geraskier-thots @nuttyrebelflower @youcantseem3 @ihateuguys @archangel1206 @southprw

[ludwigplayingthetrombone]

Wahoo here's confession part 2! So grateful for the response to the first part thanks so much :3 Enjoy!

Part 1

Kks: Yo, wobbleknees Gai: Very funy Kks: Here, let me see

Gai: Since when can you-? Kks: Sakura was excited to show me. I can only manage scrapes, so don't trip and get impaled anytime soon

Gai: Kakashi Kks: Yeah? Gai: Were you...

Gai: Being serious before? Because regardless of reciprocation, I hold the deepest affection and care possible for you very much. As a rival, friend, but also in that way as well. Just to be clear. Kks: It wasn't a joke

Kks: I'm sorry. I didnt plan on doing that but...What's the point of denying it now if you're staying anyways. I'm attracted to you, Gai. You're really the only person I can see myself trusting with that. I've regretted so much lately. I failed my team so miserably they fell apart. I wish I could have that time together back. I already regret wasting so much time avoiding you in the past. So, yeah... I know I'm a pain to deal with, but... If you want that too, th-

Gai: Every single second we've spent together I truly cherish. To have this honor of being entrusted with your heart...

Gai: I always want to be by your side, Kakashi, My man of destiny Kks: How can you say shit like that so easily?

[kks' stomach gurgles] [gai chuckles] Kks: Sorry to ruin the emotional moment. Little nerve wracking [Gai laughs]

Gai: I'll Let that go, but... May I take you on a date? Kks: ok. Gai: Really? Kks: I'm off for a few days, so why not? You'll make it interesting Gai: Excellent!

Gai: I FEEL REJUVENATED THE SPRINGTIME OF YOUTH’S FIREY PASSION FLOWING THROUGH ME

Gai: Oo!! Nearly forgot. Rival, May I kiss you? Kks: Long as your kids don't pop out, go for it Gai: Are you ok? Why are you sweaty? Kks: Whatever. just get on with it

Gai: Yosh! Turn your brain off for a moment, rival

Gai: SO-! Tomorrow then! Kks: Mhm

Gai: Night, 'Kashi! I could run 100 laps right now! Kks: Gai, your lip is bleeding Gai: HAHA! Always looking out for me!! That's my kakas-OOF![Gai falls] I'm ok! [gai's footfalls exit]

[kks chuckling] Kks: URK! [strained] stomachache. [happy hum] What the fuck have I done, mr turtle.

[moonstruckme]

i would KILL for a spencer reid x bau!reader who greets each other after a case is over like the taylor/travis post-concert video 🙏

Thanks lovely!

Spencer Reid x bau!reader ♡ 453 words

By the time he gets off the jet, Spencer’s exhausted. The team had spent all of the previous night working the case and then arresting the killer in the early hours of the morning, and he hadn’t even been able to catch a wink on the five-hour flight back from California. The sun is too bright, his back hurts from hunching over a desk all night, and he really, really wants to demolish some takeout from the Chinese place across from his apartment. 

None of that matters when he enters the building and sees you already on your way to greet him. Your walk turns smoothly into a run as a smile breaks out on your face, and even though he’s ready for it, Spencer makes a little “oof” when you throw your arms around his neck. 

You squeeze him tight, an almost inaudible squealing sound coming from the back of your throat as you press your head into his neck for a split-second before pulling back and kissing him. Spencer smiles against your lips, and you have to stop when it catches, your teeth clacking together. 

“Missed you,” you say, beaming up at him. 

He keeps one hand around your waist while using the other to clear the hair from your forehead, dropping a kiss there. “Missed you more.” 

“Not possible.” You give him another squeeze, going up on your tiptoes to hook your chin over his shoulder. 

“Does this have to happen every time?” Prentiss asks, brushing past the two of you. 

Spencer can feel your silent laughter under his palm. “Only as long as I’m on desk duty,” you say. You lower yourself to the ground to send a pointed look in Hotch’s direction. 

He doesn’t look up from his phone, large fingers punching comically tiny buttons as he texts. “One more week,” he says, going up the stairs to his office. 

You’re disappointed but not surprised, frown evaporating when Spencer laughs at you. He palms your face, tilting it up for another quick peck. “Did you really think you were going to sway Hotch with PDA?” 

“Worth a try,” you chirp, chasing him for more, but Spencer dodges you and you hit his chin. You’re fine with that, and you kiss it again to show it. “Bribery’s all I’ve got.”

“Once your hip has healed, we’ll be happy to have you back out there with us.” 

You hum. “Sure, whatever. Hey, want to grab takeout from that place across the street on our way home? You must be hungry.” 

Spencer’s hand traces a path down the inside of your arm until he gets to your hand, intertwining your fingers as you walk towards the elevator. “You have no idea.” 

[berryhobii]

Thinking about bf!Mingyu who will totally let you use him however you want, no matter the time of day or the location.

He could be dead tired after a flight and while he’s normally a light sleeper, exhaustion will just lay too heavily on his brain and send him into a deep sleep.

You were happy to have him back home after a few weeks apart, your own idol schedule keeping you busy but when everything calmed down, all you could think about was your precious boyfriend. He had recently returned from a visit with his parents and you were so incredibly happy for him. You know how much he misses them and it warmed your heart to hear about all his stories when he returned. He was practically beaming with happiness.

Your precious baby was just so adorable. You two had spent the entire day lost in your own little world; cooking, cuddling, and talking about everything you haven’t been able to.

He had chatted with you until he eventually fell asleep, the jet lag finally catching up with him and his gentle voice trailing off as he was swept into dreamland by your tender caress and soft lips pressing against his cheeks.

Little did he know, you’ve been slowly losing your mind for the past 15 minutes because of a wet dream that just startled you awake. You were sweating despite the cool AC, your heart pounding, and the heat between your legs too hot to ignore.

You and Mingyu had a really healthy sex life. Well, as healthy as it could get with your conflicting schedules but there was no denying how attracted you two were to each other. You could just look at him for a few seconds and you’d be ready to go at it. It also didn’t help that Mingyu kept slapping your ass whenever he’d walk by you or that he recently returned to his natural hair color which you’ve vocalized multiple times as your favorite. And it really didn’t help that he’s been walking around shirtless the entire day, feeding your eyes with his flat tummy and broad shoulders.

You could barely keep your hands off him today but you also didn’t want to ruin the sweet moment so you held back from jumping his bones.

And now you’re wide awake and silently wishing for relief.

The room was pitch black since that’s how you preferred to sleep so you slapped around your bedside table for your phone, squinting as the light burned your eyes a little.

3:14AM

Neither of you had a schedule tomorrow so you were planning on just spending that time together as well so you wouldn’t be wrong for waking him up, right? And sex would put him back to sleep and help him sleep better, right? You’re pretty sure that’s one of Newton’s Laws and science is science so….

Turning on your bedside lamp to a low light, you rolled over to appreciate your boyfriend who was resting on his back; his fluffy hair splayed out over his pillow, one of his buff arms laying by his head while the other rested on his tummy, and his plump lips opened slightly as he slept.

You almost hated to wake him up.

Almost.

“Gyu…” You whispered, fully expecting him to immediately wake up since he was such a light sleeper. You shouldn’t be surprised though. He always slept like this after a long schedule or plane ride.

You tapped his shoulder lightly, calling his name again. His eyebrows furrowed a little but he still didn’t wake up.

“Mingyu, wake up.” Then with another tap, his face scrunched up before his lashes fluttered; his eyes opened a little but closed again at the light of your lamp.

A soft, hmm?, came from him and your heart could have melted if all the heat in your body wasn’t currently focused in your nether regions.

“I’m sorry I woke you but….”

“What’s wrong, angel?”

Oof, you think you just fell deeper in love with him. Pet names were a secret turn on of yours. Mingyu normally just called you by your name or nickname which was fine but cutesy pet names were your favorite.

Now take that combined with his raspy sleepy voice? It was like a shock right to your cunt.

Swallowing thickly, you said, “I can’t sleep. I need…..you.”

He let out a sleepy sigh and nodded his head, groaning as he stretched out his weary body. He was about to lift up but you stopped him, his skin feeling cool under your hand.

“No no, baby. I’ll do the work.” Accepting his fate, he flopped back down on the bed. You leaned over him, rubbing your nose against his. “Thanks, baby. Sorry to wake you.”

“It’s okay. I don’t mind.”

Pressing a few pecks to his lips, your hand trailed down to reach into his pants, gasping when you felt his cock that was halfway hard.

You breathed out a little laugh. “Excited already?”

“Always for you.”

Humming, you kissed him once more before moving down until you were perpendicular to his body, your knees tucked under yourself. He helped you tug his shorts halfway down until they rested at his thighs. Just enough to reveal his hardening cock.

Gripping him lightly, you leaned forward to lick a long stripe up his shaft. You heard him sigh and felt his hand start to rub up and down your back, a comforting touch that made your heart flutter.

Holding him steady, you took his cock into your mouth, relaxing your throat so you could take him all the way down. Mingyu’s cock was bigger than anything you’ve ever had before so you’ve had to work extra hard over the years just to be able to take it. His leg twitched a little, his soothing hand on your back halting for a moment before restarting.

Since you weren’t planning on getting him to cum from head, you decided to go easy and just rile him up enough to get him to full hardness which didn’t take very long at all.

Pulling off of him, you wiped your mouth before rising to wiggle your own shorts off. Neither of you slept in with underwear on which just made this kind of sex 10 times easier.

You climbed on top of him, your knees on either side of his waist. His hands gravitated to your thighs, squeezing the fat there lightly.

“Do you need help?” He asked to which you shook your head.

“I don’t think I’ll last long anyway.” You replied as you leaned forward to press your chest against his. You reached under yourself to grab his cock and lined it up with your dripping heat.

Mingyu groaned at the feeling of you running the head of his cock up and down your wet folds. “How are you this wet already?” He moved his hands to your ass, spreading your cheeks to give you better access.

“I’ve been wanting your cock all day.” You admitted, gasping when the thick head slipped into your tight hole. Mingyu kept you spread open as you slid down his impressive girth, the thickness splitting you open and knocking the air out of you when it was completely inside.

“Shit, hurry up baby.” He cursed, pulling his lip between his teeth as he tried to hold back from fucking up into you. Although you wouldn’t complain if he did.

Adjusting your knees and rising up to lean your hands on either side of his head, you began throwing your ass back on him. Each drag made the curve in his cock rub against your sweet spot, your sopping walls already making noises that was like a direct rush of endorphins to his brain.

His hands gripped you tighter, helping you move against him.

You moaned. “F-fuck, Gyu. Feels so good. Gonna cum.”

One of his arms wrapped around your back to pull you down, the other still keeping you spread as he began snapping his hips up to meet you. Each stroke felt deeper than the last, your tummy burning with need. The feeling of your cunt wrapped around him had woken him up even more, the need to bury himself in your dripping walls overpowering his need for sleep.

Your nails dug into his shoulders, your mouth dropped open as he delivered mind numbing strokes, the clap of your ass against his pelvis m loud in the darkness of the room.

“Don’t stop—oh shit! I’m bout to cum!” You babbled, calls of his name and more pleads of him not to stop falling from your lips as hot pleasure courses down your spine.

He holds you close, breath ragged against your throat and a needy whine coming from him as your walls clenched around him incredibly tight.

A few more well placed thrusts and your brain is temporarily short circuiting as an orgasm engulfs that leaves your ears ringing and vision blanking out for a moment. You don’t stop moving your hips against him, your body shuddering as you continue to chase that residual pleasure.

Mingyu was right behind you, forcing your hips down so that he could bury himself all the way to the hilt, moaning your name as he shot hot ropes of his cum into your spasming walls.

Chests heaving, you lifted up a bit to capture his lips in a kiss. He relaxed against the mattress, melting into your affection and exhaustion trying to take him back to dreamland.

“Thank you baby.” You murmured against his lips, his hands running up your shirt to feel your skin.

“Anytime.” He hummed, ready to fall back asleep but he was jolted awake when he felt your walls tighten around him. He hissed as your hips began to move again.

“One more time?”