#or did the same thing happen to anyone else

[erodasfishtacos]

Boredom & Blind Dates [pt I]

summary: yn is a good friend, who's willing to go on a blind date so that her friend can try to pull the man of her dreams. the new bigshot doctor at the hospital she's works. the dinner isnt as charming as she hoped

word count: 5k

warnings: angst

author's note: hii! this was based off a request. the rest will be posted on patreon and there’s already another part up :)

You can subscribe for $3 USD a month here

+

Victoria was a friend that YN had made in college when they were both studying completely opposite majors but happened to be roomed in the same two-bed dorm.

They clicked instantly and just like their majors, they were also exact opposite in their personalities too but it somehow just meshed perfectly together.

Victoria was a social butterfly who did not have a fear of being the center of attention, going after whoever she wanted (and typically pulling them), and her confidence was impressive.

Despite how smart Victoria was, she had a tendency to come off a bit ditzy, and has been called an air-head more than twice in YN’s presence.

The boys in more prestigious majors like law and medicine usually didn’t find her carefree attitude as appealing.

While Tori snagged the frat boys, YN steered clear of them which worked because they had never once had a crush on the same man.

After graduation, it only made sense to move in together because Seattle was a ridiculously overpriced city but their job wages were competitive.

Victoria was a nurse, she worked on a surgery recovery wing, and complained about her job constantly because of the crabby patients and long hours.

YN worked behind a desk all day, very rarely having to interact with anyone but if she did - it was all virtual from home.

She was the head accountant for a social media marketing company which was a pretty high position for the few years of experience she had.

YN had always been serious, more mature for her age, and always excelled above everyone else in her grade.

It hadn’t been a surprise when she was valedictorian or made summa cum laude in her undergraduate and masters degree with ease.

YN didn’t party, didn’t love socializing out in clubs but would go when Victoria pressured her enough to do so, and it was fine.

YN had been so involved in establishing her career, creating a successful life, and making a name for herself that she didn’t have time for the things Victoria did.

Dating app hookups, one night stands from the bar, and casual flings that only lasted a few weeks was how Tori rolled.

Typically, at least once a month, she was bawling to YN about the latest dickhead who treated her like she was disposable but kept going for the same type.

YN had empathy to an extent, always uncorked the wine and half-listened to her rants about chivalry being dead while she was still thinking about an account she needed to work on because the deadline was coming up.

YN liked to think she lived vicariously through Victoria’s stories which worked for her because then she didn’t have to experience those things herself.

+

YN had been sitting on the couch, laptop balanced on the wide arm as she scrolled through work emails while catching up on her guilty pleasure reality show.

It was nearly ten at night but she was waiting for a reply from a customer with a time difference, work could sometimes be a whole day and night ordeal.

There was no question that YN was uptight, rarely - if ever relaxed, and did not have much time for anything other than what put a hefty sum in her bank account every two weeks.

Victoria tumbled through the front door in a way that is uniquely her - like a hurricane.

Her keys jingling, her water bottle bumping and sloshing water as she drops her purse on the floor unceremoniously with a chapstick rolling out.

She tosses all of her items in a messy pile on the ground with her bag, kicking off her tennis shoes, and nearly prances into the living room.

YN blinks over at her, the excitement of her arrival was a routine now, she no longer gets annoyed that her best friend makes an entrance like that each time.

“Babe, guess what,” Victoria squeals as she sits down right next to her on the couch, still in her magenta colored scrubs and her mascara smudged near her eyes.

“What?” YN replies as she mindlessly clicks refresh in her email, wishing for this message with the information she needs to appear.

“Our new Chief of Medicine started today! He was the head of neurology at another hospital. A literal brain surgeon which, of course I’ve met others but he’s like…the best of the best. They write news articles about him, his studies in medical journals, he’s a big deal,” Victoria is still excited as she nearly bounces in her spot, shaking YN’s laptop.

YN puts a hand up to make sure her computer doesn’t topple, still nonplussed as she looks at her friend, “What does this have to do with you? Is it just because he’s famous in the medical world?”

“No, he’s fucking gorgeous too. I didn’t think you were allowed to be as smart as he is while looking like he just walked off a runway during Paris Fashion Week,” Tori giggles as her cheeks go a bit pink, “He’s the hottest doctor I’ve ever seen.”

“Tori,” YN sighs, clicking her refresh again - nothing, “Again, what is this information leading to?”

“Well I bumped into him today, literally, in the hallway. We spoke briefly, he was polite but serious, and I felt like he was flirting with me. I feel like I have a chance with him,” Her roommate tells her, that same confidence present as ever that she can pull this big shot doctor.

“Good luck with that. I’m sure he’s married with kids,” YN replies somewhat dismissively, unamused that this is how her friend spends her time.

“Nope,” Tori quips back happily, “I googled him. He just made the New York Times list as one of the most eligible bachelors in medicine. Single as they come.”

“I thought you didn’t want to date someone who also worked in medicine,” YN reminds her, clicking refresh once again to no results.

“He’s the exception. If I could settle down with a fuckin neurosurgeon, chief medical officer like come on that would be my biggest achievement,” Victoria pulls out her cell phone, tapping across the screen.

And YN just…cannot relate.

YN only fell in love once.

Where she could fantasize about a life with that person, marriage, kids, a house but it was all fantasy as they were never official in that way.

It was crushed and YN made a promise to herself that she wouldn’t let herself dream like that again.

“Do you want to see a picture?” Victoria asks as she looks for an image to show.

As a stroke of luck, YN’s work phone starts buzzing, and it’s the client she was waiting for to email her, “I’m sure he’s as attractive as you say, Tor. I have to take this.”

Her friend mumbles something about her being in a relationship with work which is honestly not that far off at this point.

However, it gives her an excuse to lock herself in her office for a few hours to avoid the ideas of love, Victoria’s fantasy world, and think about nothing but numbers and percentages.

+

The next few weeks blend together for YN.

Every few days she actually catches up on her work.

Every few days Victoria recounts her very purposefully crafted run-ins with the chief medical officer to shoot her shot.

Victoria has always been forward, asking bluntly for what she wants but with such a seemingly intimidating man, she finally has met her match.

Her roommate deems the doctor as ‘playing hard to get’ but YN starts to wonder if she’s imagining the spark between them or if it’s truly there.

She talks about times where the doctor flat out ignores her in the hallway but brushes it off that he was extremely busy on a pressing issue.

But then there are times where he will pull her aside, gently by the wrist and ask her about how her day was going, and appear to be interested in her answers.

YN loved her friend but was wildly uninterested in these events, the only thing that kept her curiosity lingering was if she was actually going to snag the head of the biggest hospital in Seattle.

She doesn’t hear much for a week or two.

At least three months have passed since the doctor started.

And this finally appears to be a payoff when Victoria comes home with her usual hurricane routine of leaving a trail of her belongings as she comes through the front door.

“Oh my god, oh my god. Close your laptop and look at me!” Victoria announces dramatically as she rushes over to the couch, taking it upon herself to close the lid of YN’s work computer.

“Tori,” YN scolds with a grumble, she really didn’t appreciate it when her friend interrupted her work flow in the middle of her meticulously constructing a report.

“Hush,” She replies, brushing off her concerns, and patting YN’s thighs, “I need the absolute biggest, most massive favor from you ever. And I really need you to agree, I’ll owe you for eternity.”

This didn’t sound good.

YN blinks at her, expression still unamused as ever.

“Okay. I am going on a date with the chief,” Victoria squeals, high-pitched and loud, “But it’s a double-date, he was telling me he’s looking for a date for his friend. I offered you and he invited us all to dinner at The National.”

Fancy.

And YN tries to settle the itching annoyance at her friend offering her up without her approval but unfortunately it was a very Victoria-like thing to do.

Despite how uptight YN could be, she had a soft spot for her friend and would do anything within her to make her happy so instead of lecturing her about setting her up, YN agrees.

YN thinks about it as the days pass until the date, what’s stopping her from actually giving this a try?

The only information she received about her blind date was that he was also a doctor, orthopedics, and his name was Mitch.

YN dresses nicer than she had originally planned, in a form fitting black dress that shaped her chest phenomenally, making her smaller tits look full and lifted.

It also defined her backside well too, making it rounded and voluminous in a way that it normally didn’t look in her regular outfits.

YN hadn’t been with anyone in over a year, not even a casual hookup because she didn’t do those - she did commitment.

Maybe Mitch would be the one.

YN wasn’t one for magical thinking like her best friend but maybe this is what optimism was supposed to be like as opposed to her normal pessimist outlook.

Victoria dressed stunning as well, albeit a bit more revealing which was her go to, cut-outs along her ribs and the hem was nearly to her bum cheeks so she couldn’t bend over without revealing all of her bits and pieces.

YN was sure that the doctor she was pining after would take her home with her that night but she also knows Victoria is possibly looking at this to become serious.

It was all up in the air.

The National was a quiet restaurant, where business meetings were held and deals were made.

Everyone dressed in expensive outfits that made YN and Victoria’s seem a bit out of place but they blended in well enough.

Neither have been to the location before because it was reservation-only and you had to have enough of a name in Seattle to bother calling.

The fact that the chief was able to get them a table, at relatively short notice was flex in itself, showing off what clout he held in the community.

YN wasn’t impressed, per se, felt like it was a bit-show off but nevertheless it was a nice experience that she’d never likely have again after this night.

Victoria gives the hostess their name before they’re being guided towards the back of the restaurant, it lit dimly enough that it would be hard to see the menu.

As they arrive at the table, there’s two meticulous dressed men sit across from one another, both handsome in different ways.

However, one has a big smile and stands up whilst the other stays seated with a scowl that seems permanently etched on his face - light wrinkles to show for it.

The man who stands up reaches for YN’s hand, kissing the back of it, and introducing himself, “It’s a pleasure to meet you. I’ve been looking forward to it all week, darling. I’m Mitch.”

“YN,” She replies even though he already knows, allowing the kiss and giving him a polite smile back as he pulls out her chair for her.

Victoria walks around the table, somewhat awkward as her date doesn’t get up or offer to move her chair out, only a curt, “Hello, Victoria. You look nice.”

“Thanks,” Tori blushes easily, YN has to refrain from rolling her eyes at the interaction, she always fell for the rudest, douchey men on Earth.

This doctor was no different as he says back in his chair, shoulders broad, and back straight, head held high as he watches Mitch help YN in her seat.

“Thank you,” YN brushes her fingers against Mitch’s shoulder as he sits down, making eye contact with her date once again.

He had these sincere brown eyes, a shy smile, and his long hair was pulled back into a ponytail as he nods at her.

Mitch wasn’t her type, though she wasn’t picky, and was willing to give anyone a chance - he just wouldn’t be someone she would pick herself.

Maybe that’s a good thing.

“What’s good here?” YN asks Mitch as she opens her menu, it was a small list of entrees, most that YN had only seen on cooking shows or never even heard of.

“I haven’t been here. Styles here is a regular but that’s because he’s the big name ‘round here, well according to London Times - everywhere,” Mitch teases as he glances up at his friend.

Styles doesn’t even lift his lip in a half-smile, his eyes dart to YN before his friend, “The Steelhead Trout is good as is the Filet Migon.”

YN’s eyes trace back over the menu, heart seizing a bit as the numbers next to the entree - realizing that was the price was a bit of shell shock.

She knew that Mitch would pay for her but she felt guilty about ordering something that was well over a hundred and fifty dollars when she would never pay that for dinner herself.

“I think I’ll just get the thai salmon,” YN replies as she glances over, it was the cheapest option, not by much but still.

“There’s peanuts in the sauce,” The doctor tells her as he glances up from his own menu to look at YN.

YN brow furrows at him, lips turning down, and about to say something when he adds, “Victoria informed me that you have a severe peanut allergy and to choose a restaurant that could prepare your food properly.”

YN blinks to process before looking over to Victoria, “Thanks, Tor.”

“I’d rather not see freshman year thanksgiving happen again,” Victoria jokes but there is some real concern there from such a traumatic incident.

YN had accidentally come into contact with some type of nut that sent her into an anaphylactic shock.

They couldn’t find her epipen for a good two minutes until they did and were able to administer her medication until she could make it to the hospital.

Victoria had anxiety about food in their house for ages, paranoid about her own contact with the allergen, and always made sure everyone was aware of YN’s condition.

“I’ll get the filet then,” YN sighs, giving up on picking a cheap option as she closes her menu, and the waiter pours a red wine into her glass.

YN was not in the mood to drink, preferring to sip on her water instead as Victoria and Mitch emptied their first glass quickly.

Victoria’s date sipped more sophisticatedly on his, swirling it like a proper snob before taking a minuscule sip as if he was savoring it.

Mitch seemed very interested in YN, asking multiple questions about her work and personal life, he put an arm around the back of her chair which YN didn’t necessarily mind as they spoke.

From what YN could see, Victoria was not having as much luck with her date as their conversation appeared strained, her friend was doing ninety percent of the talking, and Harry was nodding with an expression of boredom.

After the soup and salads arrive, Mitch and Harry start to chat about something going on with the hospital protocols.

Victoria tries to add in, he doesn’t acknowledge her but Mitch does instead after an uncomfortable pause of silence between them.

YN stays quiet, unable to add anything, and after a moment, Mitch huffs out a laugh, “Enough work talk, we’re excluding YN.”

Harry raises his eyebrow at her, “Need to be the center of attention?”

“Hey,” Mitch frowns, rubbing at YN’s shoulder, “I didn’t mean for it to sound like that. I’m sorry if I just-“

“You’re fine,” YN waves her hand dismissively, giving her friend’s date a displeased glance that Harry returns the scowl just like he’d been doing all night.

Victoria is oblivious, as she tends to be, and is much too focused on keeping her date’s attention to worry about anything else.

“What do you do for work?” Harry asks her, randomly cutting off a story that Victoria was telling about a patient that eloped recently.

“I’m a head accountant for a social media marketing company. What about you?” YN returns the question with sickeningly sweet politeness.

She felt like Harry was a pompous prick, taking pride in his rankings, education, and had a better than attitude that YN really felt was unappealing.

To act like she didn’t know shit about him was the perfect way to irritate him apparently.

It works.

The way his teeth clench together as the wrinkle between his brow deepens further, he straightens his suit jacket before leaning forward to appear casual.

“I’m the Chief Medical Officer of The Hospital of Seattle, a neurosurgeon specializing in spinal cord injury as well as stroke and trauma, I own three outpatient medical practices, as well as instruct other neurosurgeons on new techniques and equipment,” Harry boasts, to be fair, it was extremely impressive.

There was no doubt that the man sitting across from her was extremely intelligent, she’s probably never been around anyone as smart as him but it didn’t excuse his attitude.

You can be intelligent and humble at the same time.

Apparently Doctor Styles did not get the memo.

“That’s nice,” YN replies as she takes a very small sip of wine, even though she was impressed, it didn’t reflect in her bored tone.

Harry scoffs, sitting back, and licking the front of his teeth.

His eyebrow was raised as he repeated in disbelief, “That’s nice? Nothing else, huh?”

Victoria’s eyes dart nervously between the two, she grips Harry’s bicep, “I think it’s the most impressive thing I’ve heard. Not to mention the medical journals you wrote for or the volunteer work.”

YN tucks her bottom lip between her teeth, tampering down a smile at getting a reaction out of her friend’s date, just as she had hoped.

“S’really not as impressive when the person needs to flaunt their accomplishments so extravagantly,” YN shrugs as she puts down her wine glass, nonchalant as ever, and acting as if she was being casual.

Tori delivers a kick to her shin underneath the table, along with a scolding look for her to drop the attitude with Harry because it was ruining their date.

YN pulls back because she did feel guilty at getting into it with this doctor who Tori was trying to pull and she wasn’t increasing the chances with the snide comments.

Harry is about to respond, his ringed fingers clenched on the table, and there were tattoos peeking out from the cuffs of his suit that were very undoctorlike, “You know what I think-?”

“Uhm,” Mitch coughs awkwardly to break up the tension that was getting thick and cloying between everyone at the table, “Victoria, where did you get your nursing degree from?”

The conversation breaks off, Victoria and Mitch start chatting as YN and Harry remain pretty much silent throughout the appetizers.

Victoria is forward, trying to touch her date when possible.

A brush of his hand here, a squeeze of his bulky bicep there.

Though Harry doesn’t shrug her off, he also doesn’t return the favor at all.

He is nearly statuesque, unmoving, and able to sit very still for long amounts of time.

Of course, maybe that is overly obvious because of how all over the place her friend was at all times, unable to sit still for more than a few minutes without needing to adjust the way she’s sitting or fiddle with something on the table.

YN wonders if this whole thing was set up for Mitch and Harry just settled for being on a date with Victoria to help his friend out.

The thought hurt her to think about because she wanted better for her friend.

YN enjoyed having a job that paid her well, more than most people her age were making but it didn’t define who she was.

Doctor Styles seemed to be his entire job as his personality.

How boring.

When Harry manages to get the topic back onto a work issue, YN cannot help but let out a yawn that she very half-heartedly tries to cover with her hand because she could only hear so much about a spinal surgery before she’s zoning out.

Victoria is hanging onto his every word, asking questions, and being overly interested in a lackluster story in his monotone, deep voice that could honestly lull her to sleep because of how bleak and morbid he sounded.

However, when she yawns, no one at the table notices but Harry.

His eyes have darted over to her a few times while he’s been talking, almost to gauge her level of interest, and when she yawns, he visibly huffs before continuing - his words a bit more harsh and a flutter of annoyance twisting into his cadence.

YN had neglected her date during this whole time, in full honesty.

Victoria and Mitch seemed to have a great conversation.

When YN talked to Mitch, he was nice enough and easy to have a conversation with but his boss across the table was distracting and apparently felt the need to constantly be the center of attention even though that’s what he called YN out for. 

It’s rude, YN knows it is when she excuses herself to the bathroom mid-story, placing her napkin on the table before swinging her purse over her shoulder, and navigating into the dimly-lit restaurant towards the back.

YN goes into one of the many stalls, a larger bathroom, and sits down.

She didn’t have to go to the bathroom but she had just needed a break because…

What the fuck.

What the actual fuck?

YN would be crawling out the bathroom window if Victoria wasn’t with her.

YN hears the door open and she just knows it’s Victoria.

She is definitely going to give YN a piece of her mind for her attitude at the table and she really can’t blame her because she was not being on her best behavior admittedly.

When YN pushes open the stall, already starting her speech, “Tor, I know you’re probably pissed but -”

However, YN stops mid-setence when she sees that it was not Victoria standing across from her.

No, instead it was Harry, leaning back against the sinks with his arms crossed and a scowl worse than anything that he had displayed at the table across his face.

“Already dating again?” He asks unhappily, the slight crack of his deep drawl gives away the jealously laying behind those words, “That’s pretty fuckin’ rich, innit?”

“Don’t you dare,” YN hisses back, defensive and straightening up, “You don’t have any room to talk.”

“I have plenty,” Harry grits out, his gaze unwavering, his hand twitching like he wants to reach out, “You fucked everything up, not me.”

The awful thing is that YN wants him too.

“That’s not true,” YN murmurs softer, trying to keep the feisty edge in her voice but struggling.

The emotions that she was attempting to hold in at the table were much harder to bottle up when they were standing face-to-face like this.

“You like Mitch?” Harry ignores her rebuttal, his knuckles were white where they were gripping the kitchen sink, “Think he’s nice? Boyfriend material?”

“It’s none of your fucking business,” YN snaps back, finding her bravado a bit more.

“Come here,” Harry orders, voice quiet but sharp, demanding, and it sends a chill down her spine.

“Harry-” YN begins to argue but finds herself walking forward, her heart pounding hard enough that it hurts and her hands were shaking as she clung the strap of her purse as a lifeline as her heels clicked against the tile.

“C’mon, dove,” His voice is sweeter, more goading until she’s close enough to touch.

Her lips parted in nerves, excitement, dread.

His hand reaches out to curl around the nape of her neck, fingers lightly pressing into the sides of her throat and though it was gentle, it was possessive - rooted in the jealousy of what was going on tonight with their dates.

Harry brings her towards him by the hold he has on her, until her hands are laid on his chest, and he’s leaning down as he tilts her head up.

He brushes their lips together, once, twice, and on the third time, YN pulls back and takes a few steps away from him.

“You can’t just do that,” YN huffs, grabbing a tissue from the counter and dabbing at the corners of her eyes to prevent the tears from falling and ruining her makeup, “I’m on a date. You’re on a date. It isn’t fair to either of them.”

Harry laughs unhappily, shaking his head as pushes away from the sink, heading towards the door but before he leaves, he bites back, “I don’t think you have room to be talking about fair. You obviously don’t fuckin’ understand the concept of it. Pull yourself together before you come back out.”

YN knows it immature, proves his point but gives him the middle finger before going back to dabbing at her eyes - fuck, she wishes she didn’t cry around him.

She wondered if it was worth sneaking out the window and facing the wrath of her friend later.

+

ahhhhhhh.

let me know your thoughts. this was difficult to write but im glad it turned out how i wanted it too! what do you predict?

😙😙😙

[mitsvriii]

self-talks

・❥・aventurine x reader

★ wc: 730+ ★ no reader type or pronouns used or specified ★ cw: aventurine is his #1 hater, mentioned death/ways to die, set during 2.1 quest, written by a mentally-tired high schooler, lowercase intended, lazily proofread ★ no summary for this one, notes at the end ★ if you get what’s happening i’ll give you a cupcake

“[name] doesn’t really love you, y’know.”

that voice. the same, agonizing tone that held itself high as if the owner knew every secret in the world. how aventurine hated how it followed him like an ant and he was a basket filled to the brim with succulent insecurities - as if they themselves were ripe, appetizing pieces of fruit.   

the tinted shadow, or should he say figured, of himself wouldn’t stop drilling those words into his head. aventurine tried to prevent the words from bothering him but he couldn’t shake them. it was agonizing having to hear his ‘future self’ talk about you as if you thought he was the last pawn left in a chess game, waiting to be used for the greater good. 

“that’s not true.”

because he knew you. then again so did he. future is often wiser than present but if that’s the case then why did he feel anxious at his words? 

shaking his head like a parent who caught onto their child’s lie, the ‘shadow’ tsked in mock disappointment. “honestly, i thought you were self-aware of the majority of one’s actions. are you so blinded by the scorching love that [name] provides that you cannot even see that you’re burning?”

he wasn’t burning, and you weren’t so bright that he wouldn’t be able to see anything else besides you, either. it was infuriating how this version of him - more of a shell than aventurine was in the present time, hollowed out and left to rot on a tree branch of desolation - seemed to believe that he was wiser than him about the love of their? his life. 

aventurine was as loyal as he could be to you without pushing past his boundaries (which were often as weak as a dam made out of twigs when it came to you). he could say the same about you, the absolute truth to anyone but him. bringing a hand up to his hair aventurine scratched it roughly in discomforting thought. all of this ‘he said, he says’ was making him go crazy.

or crazier than he already is in this deforming dreamscape of twisted memories and second-takes. if he ever gets out of this ‘living nightmare’, the first thing he’s going to do is charge up to veritas and-

“i wonder if [name’s] flocked to ratio yet. clutching onto him as soft weeps leave puffy eyes.”

okay, buddy.

“what’s your deal?” aventurine hissed at the amusement drawn on his face, covered hands digging crescent shapes into his gloves. “you seem so adamant in getting me to believe [name] doesn’t love me, yet i’ll probably never-“ cutting himself off with a quick bite down on his tongue, letting it go swiftly when metallic laced his taste. 

he couldn’t think like that. that anxious feeling that sunk into his stomach as if it were made of quicksand tried to open and claw its way out of him.

if aventurine could not ever see your face or hear the voice (that he wanted to put on a record and play it repetitively), he feels as if he would rip out all of his hair that you adored combing your fingers through, floss it through his teeth, tie it up, and ha-

a shaky exhale, “there’s a high chance i’ll never see [name] again, so what’s the point of getting me to openly despise everything that pertains to…what’s the point?”

he only smirked in response, the expression on his face was akin to looking in a mirror of opposition to aventurine’s own. he hated how he looked.

oh. so that’s it, huh? could it be that his ‘future’ version seemed to be nothing more than what aventurine himself already imagine what his future would be like, was that it? whom was molded with clay laced with nothing but pure self-hatred without you being there to swat them away.

inhaling sharply, pain shot up through aventurine’s head as he doubled over. he clutched his head and gritted his teeth as if he had a severe brain-freeze, shaking it as he stomped a foot to the ground as if he were in a tantrum. in all honesty, he looked like he was. 

puffs of frustration left him as he glanced up, eyes meeting his own heavy, irritated ones as he stared into them with ferocity. “oh aventurine”, he spoke to himself as he blinked away.

“you’ve got to stop talking in mirrors.”

me if writing bad characterization for my fics was hilarious 😹😹😹 seriously though i need to character study him more. take this while i go cry into my pillow over exams 🙏 this didn’t go as i originally had in mind but we ball!!! i hope this flops harder than a fish on a deck after it has just been caught i hate it sm

[pukanavis]

Fuyume Hanamura Idol Story 1

ーThe Yumenosaki Academy library, two years since the establishment of ES.

Fuyume: Excuse me?

Are there any fairy tales here…?

Oh, the shelf over there is the section for picture books and stuff?

Thank you for your help.

~...♪

(Ah, she was right. Yume recognises a bunch of the books over here.)

(They’ve got a good selection to choose from but the categorising is a mess. They’re just randomly thrown onto the shelf without any care for alphabetical order or release date.)

(Oh well…apparently no one has any love for fairy tales…)

(‘The Little Mermaid, ‘Momotaro’, ‘Tale of The Bamboo-Cutter’, ‘Snow White’, ‘Urashima Taro’, ‘Cinderella’—)

(Oh! It might not be the one Yume was looking for but he’s in the mood to read Cinderella today.)

(This story is another one that Yume adores.)

(It’s a tale about love being rewarded.)

…♪

Fuyume: …? Hm? Oh, uhm, you’re that nice person from earlier—did you need something?

You were so kind to Yume earlier, so he’d be happy to give you some company.

Huh? The Yumenosaki Academy library is off-limits to anyone that doesn’t work for or attend the school?

How could you tell that Yume isn’t a student here?

Ooh, cause Yume isn’t wearing the uniform…?

That makes sense…no biggie, Yume will be sure to wear the school uniform next time.

Yume is really good at sewing, so it won’t be a problem…fufu ♪

Huh? That’s not the issue?

Yume doesn't like anything you’re saying right now.

Here he was thinking you were a nice person.

Fuyume: Huh? Yume’s name is Fuyume Hanamura.

And you are? …Anzu-san? You’re a graduate of Yumenosaki?

You’re here at your old school to do some producer work, huh? It made you feel nostalgic so you’ve been walking around the grounds…? 

Oh, is that the case? Hmm…♪

Then, aren’t you and Yume in the same boat? Yume goes to a middle school separate from Yumenosaki and you’ve already graduated…right?

It sounds like neither of us are allowed to be here.

Let's work together then, okay? If you pretend you never saw Yume, he won’t go around yelling, ‘There’s a trespasser in here!’ …♪

What do they call it? A contract, business, bargaining? Let’s do something like that…♪

If you’re willing to comply, Yume will leave you be. He isn't particularly interested in you anyway.

Yume is just here to read some fairy tales.

…♪

Fuyume: Huh? Did you need something else? You want to know what Yume is reading?

Ehehe, you’re interested in fairy tales? Sounds like we can get along.

Ehehehehehe. Yume is just reading a picture book about the massively popular princess, Cinderella. Though, he actually wanted to read something else. 

Maybe you’ve heard of it? For some reason, no one in Japan knows about it—it’s a fairy tale about an amethyst. 

Even if you don’t know the story, maybe you’ve heard this quote before?

—”The amethyst broke into pieces.”

Fufu. I guess you haven’t heard of it. Oh well.

Basically, it’s a story about an ordinary girl that comes across an amethyst that can grant any wish that she desires.

In fact, she actually fuses with the amethyst and becomes a crystalised-human of sorts.

It’s a curse put on her by an evil witch…ehehehehe ♪

The plot is kinda similar to ‘The Happy Prince’. Actually, something like ‘Arabian Nights’ or ‘The Monkey’s Paw’ might be a better match.

After transforming into the wish-granting amethyst, the girl wishes for her crush to pay attention to her, or to become better friends with people—

With each little wish she makes, the amethyst uses its power and gradually begins to crack—

Aah…♪ Eventually, her body becomes so fractured that it crumbles away and she loses all of the love and friends that she had been granted.

Her loved ones view her like a monster and chase her away in fear.

After everything, the final wish she makes is—

Fuyume: —Ah, wait, Yume thinks you should read it for yourself to find out what happens next. Spoilers are a crime!

Ehehe. If there’s one thing Yume can say, it’s that he empathises with the amethyst girl and even admires her.

At the end of it all, the final remaining piece of her—

Becomes a ring that showers the wedding between her best friend and the one she loved in joy.

After everything, her final wish is—wait, oops, Yume just realised how much he’s spoiling. He’s really really sorry.

You don’t mind? Really? You’re super kind, you know?

Ehehe. You see, Yume shares the same wish as the girl who became a ring.

—-“I wish for your life to be full of joy.”

During her final moments, the girl whose selfish asks led her to break apart used her last wish to bring someone else happiness. 

Ehehe. Yume doesn’t have the power to grant wishes but he’ll do everything he can to achieve that too.

For example, Esu goes to Yumenosaki so Yume snuck in to watch over him in secret.

Huh? Does Yume love Esu?

It depends how you define ‘love’ but yep, Yume loves Esu.

But it's sad, isn't it? The reality we live in isn’t a fairytale.

—The amethyst already shattered long ago.

[grimm-writings]

Hey! Can I request a falin x reader where reader is a lone researcher in the dungeon and stumbles into chimera falin and the two fall in love?

Maybe Like a 5 times the reader has met chimera falin and 1 time the two get to meet after she’s turned back type story?

beauty/beast

…ft! falin x gn! reader

…tags! 5+1 format, reader is like slightly unhinged, fluff with moments of angst, slight suggestiveness

…wc! 2789

…notes! grimm tries not to come off as a monsterkisser for nearly 2.7k words, the fic,,,, hope you enjoy!!!! i love chimera falin so bad… 

One

You can’t say you didn’t ask for this.

It’s a death sentence to traverse into a dungeon on your own, especially with your lack of combat skills.  If you were sane, you’d have hired a bodyguard to help take down monsters you couldn’t handle.  Fortunately, you are not, and decided instead you could very well handle monsters in a pacifistic way.

Any companion you told this to chose to stare at you like you admitted to dark magic.

So, you’ll simply prove the nay-sayers wrong!  After all, how hard can it be to tame some monsters?

Very hard, actually.  Like… incredibly.

You had to pride yourself in how you managed to sweet-talk some petty thieves for advice on monsters in the floor you’re currently on, even how to avoid orcs!  At least that much is out of the way.

As for fighting, well, sometimes a very sharp slap to the head with a book, or even the sharp tip of a pen can subdue anyone, if just to give you enough time to run.

Besides, blood makes for some extra ink if you just happened to come by a dead body!

Going purely on efficiency alone, you’re doing tremendous work!  When it comes to your study?  Not so much.

The purpose of coming all the way down here is that you have a very specific urge.  That being, to tame a beast.  Some researchers gained the will to try and do the same to elemental spirits, why not other monsters?

One of the most common rebuttals you receive is that monsters are animals, they can’t be tamed at all, and you shouldn’t even try lest you want your head bitten off.  Considering thus far you only got bitten by a walking mushroom, you think you’re doing rather well!  (You did take an hour to contemplate to yourself how a walking mushroom seemingly has teeth, though.)

That brings you now later to the fourth floor, trying to shield your notes from the water as you lament losing more ink.  Sure, you might write a little bit more than should be necessary, but you surely can’t be out already!

So, delight fills you as you peer past a doorway to see the top half of a woman face down on the floor.  Haha, you can likely drain her pretty easily for some ink!  Looks fresh enough, and some patches of her are already damp with red!

You skip over, humming as you do so, when all at once the woman jerks and looks up at you.  Her golden eyes pierce your own, making you freeze in place.  You wonder if something had gotten mixed up and a succubus ended up making its way to an upper floor, when the walls of the small tower the woman is inhabiting collapses.

A chimera screeches at you, as if telling you to leave it alone.  If you weren’t so awestruck, you would have tried to shush it, lure it towards you and petted its oddly human head.  Alas, you let the chicken-legged thing go, finding a safe haven for itself.

Day 1: I have found a beast in its purest form. I must pursue it. I must tame it.

Two

‘Obsession’ would be putting your experience lightly.

You had never wanted to gaze upon a monster as much as you wished to see the chimera again.  Unique is its proportions, the lower body of a dragon and the torso and head of an adult tallwoman.

To anyone else, its face must be more of a lure.  With the prettiest face and… great assets to boot, like a fish drawn to an angler fish's light, a blindsided adventurer comes near.

You had tried to navigate where the beast has gone, observing the damages of certain areas to lead you closer to it.

Thoughts course through your mind like speckles of a daydream as you walk and walk and walk, trying to sneak past other enemies and adventurers as you do so.  What would its feathers feel like?  Is it different from the mop of blonde hair on its head?  You didn’t get the chance to observe its eyes – are they human or monster?  What of its body heat?  What is its diet?

Ah.  Diet.

Your own body stops walking in realisation.  By all means, comparing their mouth to the rest of their body, it’s ultimately impossible for the chimera to have a stable diet in this dungeon, correct?

Perhaps… you need to make a lure of your own.

Even after days of navigating the dungeon, you still have plenty of rations from the surface remaining in your bag.  Hopefully the chimera likes the most noble meal one can fit inside a lunchbox — meats and pasta with the richest sauce.  One could say your taste in meals is unique, eliciting a morbid curiosity.  If the beast is more in tune with its human side, it will react the same.

You don’t know what tempted you to arrange a table with two chairs on either side.  It’s not like the chimera could fit, but it was only suitable for your first formal meeting with it!  Oh, how you can’t wait to observe it eating, and so close…!

If you’re lucky, it may even attempt to taste you.

You promptly shake off the thought.

What you focus on now is to draw the chimera near.  It seems to favour secluded areas, but has been seemingly chased around.  Aw, is it scared of humans?  That’s just adorable!  Or, maybe, it’s resting before setting off on a search…  Now that’d be some juicy stuff!  Who’s the chimera’s prey?  Another monster, or humans?

Oh, of course you’ll use yourself as bait.  You’re not a coward!

You know basic enough spells that you won’t be entirely drained of mana upon use, lighting up a route to catch the chimera’s attention upon spotting it.  Down you lead it, making yourself look as bright and delectable as possible, before sitting in your seat, your meal readily prepared for the chimera.

You smile up at her as she pokes at the food you prepared, and she begins to eat.

Day 3: The beast was very hungry upon encounter.  Even when she finished the meal, she insisted on having something more.  I complied, and soon I had emptied my entire share of rations.  The chimera eats food made for humans easily. This elicits curiosity – it might be proof enough that the chimera’s existence in this dungeon is unnatural.  Even now, it looks too… human.  I feel uncomfortable now referring to the beast as such – an ‘it’. Thus, I will refer to the chimera as ‘she’ from here on.  It suits her.  She truly is magnificent.   All signs point to her being an attempt at creating a ‘beast-kin’, but instead of using the soul of a monster and body of a human, it’s as if it’s a mesh of both.  A disgustingly beautiful transformation.  To compare, it is not dissimilar to the breeding of a pug.  Deliberately done to appease someone, something.  A selfish birth. Someone must be wanting to do the same as I to the chimera – tame her to their whims. …I’ll have to look further into this.

Three

You feel less in control of your studies these days.

The more you hang around the dungeon, scavenging for food and following your muse, the more insane you feel.  But, for the sake of research, you power through.

The chimera, she has been opening herself up to you.  When she gets anxious, her feathers ruffle, and you shush her with pets.  She calms down occasionally.  Once, you had encountered her, blood on her body and under her fingernails.  You cleaned her using the mana-infused water.  She had never looked so calm.

She doesn’t feel like a monster you have tamed, but a friend.

This scares you.

Sure, there’s the possibility that the chimera is an unnatural phenomenon, and isn’t even a monster.

But that also means you’re losing your resolve.

The chimera sits with you, as you scrub her red-scaled talons free of dirt and blood.  Her upper body leans on you, resting.  You can even hear little chirps slipping from her lips.

She’s so cute.

Even as her golden eyes soften, the small slits in them dilating to exhibit relaxation, she smiles at you.  You don’t flinch when her hands take your face to look at you.  She’s a bird after all – she might be trying to memorise you, how you look, so she knows not to hurt you in the future.

You were nearly about to reminisce on your further embarrassment when the chimera speaks.

Four words.  She spoke four words in the common language, leaving you staring at her.  You’re speechless.  She must know that she’s caught you off guard as she slowly tucks your hair behind your ear and moves away.

The moment is quickly ruined.  “Dragon!”  A boyish voice calls.  “There you are.  You’ve been leaving my side so frequently.  There’s no time to–”

An elf in a cloak freezes upon noticing you.  His heavy eye bags rival your own as he glares down at your sitting position.

You don’t do anything, merely looking up at your friend in confusion.  She is back to being silent again, reaching her arms out to the elf, as if about to pick him up.  He swats at her, before pointing at you.

“Kill them,” he demands her.

She hesitates.  You also find yourself unable to move.  So the chimera is under someone’s control after all.  This elf, forcing you apart from your friend.

You hardly process your friend lifting you off the floor, her fingers closing in around your throat.  Tighter and tighter.  Your eyes can barely make out her empty expression as she squeezes the life out of your lungs.

Snap.

You fall onto the floor, and the mad mage leaves with his dragon in tow.

Day ??: “My name is Falin.” The chimera told me this last time we encountered one another.  She has a name.  A beautiful name that belongs just to her.  Falin. …I would say ‘my Falin’, but she is not.  She is under the control of that elf.  I wouldn’t want her to be my Falin anyway. She shouldn’t belong to anyone. I was revived by a kindly Eastern woman, who is accompanying a group of retainers following their lord.  They are joined by another party, also recently revived. Apparently, in my revival, I had uttered her name, “Falin,” and captured the attention of the malnourished lord. He is looking for her. …I was informed she is his love. Pushing personal feelings aside, I asked to come along.  I neglected to mention Falin’s current state.  I couldn’t do that to him right now.  Maybe once he sleeps, or eats… but not now. Falin, I wish to save you.  That is my goal now. You are not a monster to be tamed.

Four

Today, you met Laios Touden.

He is Falin’s older brother, you learn.

You met a lot of people, actually.  You met Falin’s party, an elf who Falin went to school with, as well as Laios Touden.

“You’ve seen Falin?”  He asks you, brow creased.  He had leaned forward in interest.  Lord Toshiro, Kabru, and Asebi were also listening to you with intrigue.

You nod.  “Yes, but I fear the situation might be a little more than you have bargained for,” you vaguely inform.

Your words would be interrupted by Laios’ request to talk privately with Toshiro, to which you comply.  You do already have a feeling of what's being said, something Kabru seems to pick up on as he glances over at you.

“Falin… isn’t faring well, is she?”

“Not in the traditional sense,” you reply.  Kabru grimaces, clearly not appreciating your rather… erratic way of conversing.  You add before he could talk back, “she’ll come back for me.”

Kabru furrows his brow.  “Excuse me?”

His question remains unanswered until you are swept up in a heated battle.  Looks of horror cross everyone’s faces at the bloody acts committed by the chimera.

You merely smile.

“Hello beauty,” you whisper when she turns to you.  Falin steps forward, cornering you.  You welcome her with open arms – and the world becomes dark again.

Day ??: Scorned though I may be by Lord Toshiro, I know myself not to be mad, but in love. Yes, I am in love.  I know this now for certain. I know that he, too, is in love.  I do not see his wishes badly.  In fact, from a sane man’s mouth, it is perfectly understandable.  Dark magic is dangerous.  As is love.  He’s risking his own reputation for it, even if others don’t appear to see things the way he does. But when push comes to shove, I am not that sane man.  I am joining Laios Touden’s party in the retrieval of Falin. The aftermath of the battle consisted of a hearty meal.  Who knew monsters could taste so nice?  Keep this in mind for the next adventure. I had figured this all came from the result of black magic.  Marcille Donato is a much more interesting woman than I thought.  I’m sure I could learn a lot from her. Hence, we march forward.  I know you aren’t in your right mind, Falin, but trust that I am. I will risk it all for you, beauty.

Five

The ice is cold underneath your fingertips.  The woman encased inside is relaxed, as if she’s merely asleep.  To see her completely separated from the lower half of the chimera body was something uncanny to you, so used to seeing her towering over you, able to squash you like a bug.

You turn to Marcille as she approaches.  “You had the right mind, keeping her fresh like this.  Deep down, you really did want to follow through with the plan!”

The blonde elf is sheepish.  “I did end up causing a right mess in the end.  It… It was selfish of me.”

“It was love,” you reply.

“Not the love Falin needs, though,” she finishes.

You both stare up at her in silence.  If you were delusional enough, you could swear you could see Falin breathing.

“I love her,” you admit, quieter than you have ever been.  “Is that alright with you?”

Marcille turns to you, her eyes wide.  For such a gossip, she really hasn’t picked up on it?

“I…”  She hesitates.  Her hands reach her trousers, and she scrunches up the fabric in her hands.  “It’s not my choice what – or who – Falin chooses.  I don’t think I have the right to decide anything for her.”

You nod, graciously taking Marcille’s word to heart.

You feel you’ve also changed throughout your journey.  Volatile as you may be, you appreciate Falin as she is.  An untamed beauty.  Not for anyone to claim or put their ideals onto.

She’s simply Falin.

“Come on,” Marcille takes your hand.  She has the kind of look on her face where you know she accepts you readily.  “Let’s go eat, okay?  For Falin.”

You smile back.  “For Falin.”

I don’t care about the day anymore. Falin is being revived today.  Soon, I’ll have a chance to meet the real her.  The beauty behind the beast. Ha.  I haven’t called her that for a while. Maybe I’ll follow Toshiro’s way and propose immediately too?  No, Marcille may accept me, but that might result in another need for revival. I can’t wait to get to know you.

the first time

Falin opens the door with a dazed expression, not expecting the crowd waiting around the door.  Of course, this resulted in quite the hoo-ha.  People running around, celebrating the successful revival of Falin Touden.  You wait patiently for you to be welcomed once more.

The woman is sitting calmly at her bed.  Some of her features are still feathered, but you’ve always liked how they felt underneath your fingertips.

She glances up at you, examining your form.

You’re taller than she thought.

“Hi,” you say, handing over a random blade of grass you picked.

Falin takes it.  Her fingers brush against your own.  She starts twirling the natural green between her fingers.  She smiles warmly.  “Hello,” her soft, tired voice returns.  It’s so sweet that you might melt.  “My name is Falin.  It’s nice to meet you.”

You know from the way she glances up at you that she already remembers you quite well.

Feeling the happiest you’ve ever been, you fall into Falin, pulling her into the tightest of hugs.

“It’s so wonderful to meet you too, beauty.”

Today, she asked me if she could belong to me. I said yes, but only if she belonged to herself first. She accepted.

[amizuki]

watched the pilot storyboards, albeit only 3/4 of it, and I like how the pilot made Luz seem more like an outcast eccentric weirdo, which is what she's supposed to be, rather than an ignorant asshole who is borderline terrorist

instead of her waltzing into school with dozens of spiders, snakes and fireworks, that she all planned to use INSIDE the building with a smile on her face and not a care in the world, here she instead only brings one snake to school and that's it. a snake that stays with her and her only, doesn't bite anyone, and whom she also later sets free OUTSIDE school. sure, she mentions that Azura is going to "explode out of the snake's stomach", but I heavily doubt it meant that, if the teacher hadn't stopped her, she was gonna pull out a big pack of fireworks, like the ones she had in the show, stuff them inside the snake's mouth and blow it up, especially considering she called the snake "friend" and seemed to treat it like an actual living being, instead of a book report prop, since she had a bag of food for it in her locker.

honestly they should've kept this scene in the 1st episode, at least partially.

like, the start of the episode would play out the same as in the pilot, except Amity isn't here and doesn't stand up for her, so Luz just quietly sits down at her desk in embarrassment and maybe pets the snake while looking upset or something. it then continues the same, up until she opens her locker.

(by the way, I feel like this scene would work better to show the audience that Luz is a nerd, by looking at all those things in the locker, that are usually considered as either nerdy, childish or both, rather than having Luz herself just tell us that she likes to do nerdy things)

in the pilot, that's where Amity walks by and Luz tries to talk with her, but since she wouldn't be able to be here in the actual show, instead Luz would hear an announcement from the principal that he needs her to go to his office. cut to her sitting in the office with her mom already there, and then it generally plays out the same way it did in the 1st ep – the principal says that Luz's been disrupting classes often and have been making her classmates weirded out and disturbed by her antics, which also simultaneously lead to her having no friends. no spiders in class and fireworks inside building – only her acting overly eccentric and weird, to the point where she might accidentally ignore some of the social norms, like with that book report in the pilot and the school play in the show. then the principal mentions today's geometry class that Luz interrupted and says that this was the final straw – not only because something like that happened however many times before, but also because this time she brought a live snake to class, and while it didn't bite anyone (unlike in the show, where her snakes bit MULTIPLE people, and Luz was just like "oops, guess that's where the backup snakes went haha lmao"), it was still a very dangerous thing to do. Camila would react to it in surprise and ask "Mija, where in the world did you even get a snake?" or something like that, with Luz just kinda awkwardly shrugging in response, while looking down at the floor. after that, the principal offers for her to go to a summer camp, to "get her head out of the clouds", and everything else plays out the same way it did in the actual 1st episode.

if it was like that, then, once again, it would actually make Luz look like just an eccentric nerd, who doesn't actively try to harm or disturb anyone, and just does things that she thinks are cool or fun. sure, she might come off as a bit ignorant, with her occasionally ignoring classes and social cues, but it would be just because she's too passionate about the things she likes and gets so much into them, that she might forget the real world in the process.

but uh... the 1st episode Luz isn't exactly that

letting dozens of small spiders inside class, while not giving a shit about people who are scared of those is not cool or fun.

letting however many snakes roam free and bite everyone, while, again, not giving a shit about them being bit is not cool or fun.

and, fucking hell, setting off fireworks inside the school without a second thought is NOT cool or fun

so yeah, that's all I've got

also I wish the "Why would anyone throw it away?" moment with Eda was somehow kept in the show, because it's honestly beautiful and I love it. I don't know how they'd be able to pull it off in the actual show, since Amity was never able to go to Human Realm there and thus Luz wouldn't be able to make that drawing of them, but oh well, it's good that we're able to see this scene at least in the storyboard form.

[imagine-a-life-like-this]

Accidentally In Enemies : Part 3 (S.CB)

Word Count : 2.7k

Warnings : swearing, breakup, food, heartache, angst

A/N : Just the epilogue left now! I'm sorry it took so long to get this part out but I ended up hitting major writer's block with this part. Hopefully the epilogue won't take long to get out so I can start posting the next series soon after the poll is finished!

            It felt like the beginning again. The first day that San broke up with her. She woke up the morning after the dinner, everything processed in her brain, and she didn’t want to get up. Wanted to waste away in bed. Re-reading texts between them, wondering when things went wrong. Scrolling through pictures she had yet to delete, wishing for those days to come back. When they looked so happy together, so in love.

            But Changbin refused to let her waste away in bed. Showing up at her house every single day. He didn’t let her sit with her thoughts for too long, always having something to say. Makes sure she takes care of herself. Helping her realize that this wasn’t the end of her love life, just the end of this chapter.

            She had gotten used to having him around. Expecting him to be knocking at the door at the same time each day. She would find herself pulling herself out of bed to get ready for his arrival. Having a shower, getting dressed, doing her makeup. Why am I trying to impress Changbin? She would find herself thinking. But his knock would pull her from her thoughts, and she wouldn’t think about it until the next day. A cycle. A routine. It’s been so long since she had a routine like this.

            A routine that didn’t seem boring. A routine that had her excited for each day. Changbin helped her find excitement and happiness in each day. Just by being around. She went from absolutely hating him to craving his time and attention. Waiting for classes to be over so she could see him again.

            Until it all seemed to crumble around her.

            The day started the same as it always did. With her getting ready, wondering again why she was trying to impress Changbin. And then he knocked on the door, pulling her from her wandering mind. But when she opened the door, her smile fell, and she was met with Choi San. She went to close the door, but he stopped her, slamming his hand on it, and pushing it back open. “I just want to talk.”

            “Everything has been said and done, San. Let’s face it. Our relationship was over long before the breakup. I realized that recently. I’m over it.” She goes to close the door again, but he stopped her again.

            “You said your piece, can I please say mine?” She stood there, staring at him, tracing his features with her eyes. She could see the bags under his eyes, wondering if he was losing sleep over what happened at the dinner weeks ago. But the obviously fresh hickey proved to her that he really didn’t care about her. He’s here for him.

            “Talk.” San is persistent, she knows that. If she doesn’t hear him out now, he’ll come back again. And again. It used to be one of her favourite things about him. He’d go to her after every fight. If she wasn’t ready to talk, he’d sit with her until she was, letting her know he wasn’t going anywhere. But right now? She hates it. Wishes he could let things be said and done, focus on his new relationship, allow her to focus on herself.

            “Can I come in?” She shook her head.

            “You can talk out here.” He nodded, running his fingers through his hair.

            “I didn’t flirt with Gahyeon or anyone else while we were together, I promise you that. We started texting, but nothing romantic until I officially ended things with you.” He paused to assess the look on Y/n’s face. Try to gauge what she’s thinking, but her face was blank. Her eyes held no emotion. All she did was nod, and turn to shut the door again, but he started talking again. “Please say you believe me.”

            “Let’s say that I do. Where does that leave us? We’re still broken up. You still had someone else in line for when we broke up. Nothing changes. So what was the point of you coming all the way over here to tell me this?” Silence fell over them for a minute while San tried to think of something. “Good talk.” She goes to close the door for a fourth time, but this time stops herself to say one more thing. “Maybe you should make a note in your phone of her favourites. So you don’t forget.” Before San could say anything else, she closes the door.

            He goes to knock again but is stopped by Changbin. “I think it’s pretty clear she doesn’t want to talk to you.” San looks at the door and then back at Changbin, noticing the bags of food he had in his hands. He realizes now that she was expecting Changbin when she first opened the door, smile wide, makeup freshly done. It reminds him of when they first started dating, when he would show up at her house with food and gifts. How she would open the door with the same smile, the same starry look in her eyes. It’s clear to him now that she’s completely moved on, and for some reason, he hates the feeling settling in his chest.

~

            It didn’t hit her until she was gathering her belongings together after class, humming a song to herself that Changbin likes to sing to her, that she was growing attached. She was falling for him. She didn’t think of San anymore. Or the hurt he gave her. She didn’t think of the breakup in the coffee shop with San handing her a drink she barely drank. Or the dinner where San pointed out food she would hate. She didn’t even think of the fact that her relationship with San was over long before either of them walked away. That he had another girl lined up for when he left her.

            She thought of Changbin coming in, sliding her favourite drink across the table like he was the one she was supposed to be meeting up with the whole time. How he knew immediately which meal at the restaurant she would like, knowing the one San pointed out was one she wouldn’t eat. She thought of the way Changbin didn’t let her dwell in the heartbreak. He mended her heart before she could even realize it was broken.

            The realization stopped her in her tracks, steps away from her desk, her bag falling to the floor. She was in love with Changbin. How could she be in love with Changbin? She spent years hating him, wanting nothing to do with him. Now all she wants to do is spend the day with him. Everyday.

            “Are you okay?” Changbin came rushing in, picking her bag up off the ground, looking over her to see if she was injured anywhere. “Are you sick?” When he placed his hand on her forehead, she met his eyes. They were filled with worry and concern. And they were only focused on her. Even with other students around them, he only looked at her. “Let’s get you home and I’ll make you some soup.”

            He slung her bag over his shoulder with no hesitation, wrapping her in his arms, leading her out of the building and to his car. People stared. They whispered. But Changbin didn’t care. He still only looked at her. She stopped walking and reached for her bag, but Changbin pulled back. “You don’t have to do this anymore. It’s been almost two weeks since I’ve seen San. We can end this and go back to the way things used to be.” She held out her hand for her bag, but Changbin softly hit it away.

            “What if I don’t want to? What if I want to continue to be by your side? Did you ever think of that?” She stared at him, unsure of what to say. It never crossed her mind that Changbin wanted to be with her. Despite that being the most plausible reason for him continuing to show up everywhere. She always saw him as someone to hate, someone that hates her just as much. “Let me just take you home. Please.” He sounded desperate. As if he was seconds away from getting on his knees. So she gave in.

            The drive was silent. Unlike the drives in the past, which were usually filled with music, Changbin singing along, looking over at her, and serenading her with every cheesy love song. She would laugh, playfully smack his arm, and tell him he was a dork. But it never stopped him. Not that she wanted him to stop. And now that he’s not, she wishes for nothing more than just to be serenaded one last time.

            “Don’t come around anymore.” She said softly as she got out of his car. “Thanks for all your help.” He nodded and she shut the door. He waited until she was inside to drive away, trying to pretend like his heart wasn’t hurting and his eyes weren’t stinging from holding back tears.

~

            She tried to keep to routine the following days, but without Changbin knocking at her door making her excited for the days to come, the routine seemed to fall apart. It felt like she was back at square one. Pulling herself out of bed, shuffling into the bathroom. She tamed her hair that was knotted all over from tossing and turning, brushed her teeth, and washed her face.

            Her eyes scanned over her makeup when she sat at the desk in her room, glancing up into the mirror. And then she stood up, got dressed, and left her room. “Eat something before you go.” Her roommate called after her. When she turned around, she saw dishes scattered on the table. “Did you and Changbin break up?” Her roommate asked as they sat at the table to eat. “I got used to having him around everyday.” She giggled.

            “Me too.” Y/n mumbled then caught herself. “We weren’t dating!” Her roommate looked at her like she didn’t believe her.

            “Oh please. So he was just coming over everyday with food just because?” Y/n nodded. “Picking you up after class? Taking you out all the time? Late night drives? All just because?” She nodded again, slowly this time, taking in the words. “And look at you now. You look like you’re going through a break up.”

            Y/n looked down at her outfit. It was warm outside so she wore a t-shirt with a pair of shorts. It was comfortable. She thought it was cute. But if Changbin were here to pick her up, she’s sure she would have gone for a skirt instead. Or maybe a little sundress. She would have done her hair better. A touch of makeup. “I’m going to class.”

            “Just admit you guys broke up!” Her roommate calls after her and she slams the door, blinking back tears as she hops on her bicycle. It’s been a while, used to Changbin driving her everywhere. But she took a deep breath, put her ear buds in, and took another second to blink back more tears, and then headed for class.

            She didn’t even notice the all too familiar car sitting across the street. Changbin sitting inside, watching her to make sure she was okay. He wonders if she ate the food he left on the steps for her. Wonders if she wished he knocked on the door. If she misses the mornings they shared the way he did.

~

            When all her classes were done, she packed up slower than usual, nothing to look forward to anymore. Changbin wasn’t waiting for her outside the classroom door with his heart stopping smile. He wasn’t going to take her bag and wrap an arm around her, talking a mile a minute about his day, asking about hers, as he led her to his car. They wouldn’t drive around until they found something to do, somewhere to eat.

            Instead she walks alone to her bike, head down, ignoring all the chatter around her. She’s come to terms with the fact that maybe, just maybe her and Changbin took the fake dating thing a little too seriously. Got a little too close. Became a little too attached. “Y/n.” Her head snaps up at the familiar voice, seeing someone standing by her bike with a nervous smile.

            “What are you doing here?” She grumbled as she unlocked her bike, getting ready to go home. And then she stood up, holding her bike by the handlebars, staring at the man that nervously scratched the back of his neck. “If you don’t have anything to say, goodbye.”

            “Y/n wait, please.” She really thought she’d never see him again. Hoped she’d never see him again. “You and Changbin. Is it true you broke up?” She used to find his nervous habits cute. The way he’d kick his feet, scratch at his neck, barely make eye contact. But not anymore.

            “That’s not any of your business, San.” She answered.

            “Do you want to know why I actually broke up with you?” He asked before she could leave. The question had her stopping in her tracks. She thought she knew. He didn’t love her anymore. He forget everything about her, started to learn about someone new. “You’re right that our relationship was over long before either of us walked away, but do you know why?”

            “Because you fell out of love with me.” She answered, turning around to face him. He shook his head.

            “Because I knew you and Changbin didn’t really hate each other.” She let out a laugh. She remembers telling San all the things Changbin has done to her, said to her. All the times he made her cry. She would say his name with venom lacing her words. “It was only a matter of time before you saw what I did.”

            “What the fuck are you talking about? I despised him.”

            “I didn’t.” She whipped her head around to see Changbin standing there. “I never hated you. I’m just an idiot and a coward.”

            “I got to go.” She said, getting on her bike and leaving before either of them could say anything else. San nodded his head towards her, telling Changbin to go after her. He watched as Changbin rushed to his car, leaving as fast as he could, knowing he was right. He leaned against the bike rack, shoving his hands in his pockets, practically kicking himself for the words that came out of his mouth.

            That’s not how he wanted the talk to go. He just wanted to know if there was any hope for them to start again, but he knew by the look in her eyes when she saw him that the answer was no. It would always be no. He was too late.

~

            Changbin beat her to her house, standing in front of her steps by the time she made it home, a hopeful smile on his face. “Can we please talk?” She took in his appearance. The dark circles under his eyes, the holes in his shirt. It looked like he rolled out of bed and went to class, but why does she still find him attractive?

            “You look like a mess.” She said. He looked down at his outfit and chuckled, shrugging his shoulders, telling her he didn’t think he would be seeing her today, even though he wanted to. “Are you going to give me some cheesy speech about how you’ve always had feelings for me and that made you nervous so you said dumb things and that made me hate you?” He opened his mouth to dispute that but closed it and nodded. “Idiot.”

            “We’ve established that.” He said. She giggled and nodded. “So? Should we give us a real chance?” He looked at her with a hopeful look in his eyes, cocking his head slightly to the side as he waited for her answer.            

“Let’s go inside. We have a new episode of our show today.” She said, taking a step towards him, turning him around, and lightly pushing him up the steps, slipping her hand in his before she opened the door. He smiled at her, holding tighter so she couldn’t slip away this time.  

back to masterlist

@mxnsxngie @maeleelee @turtledove824 @moon0fthenight @dinossaurz

[olderthannetfic]

I'm a fan of a certain shōnen manga/anime that isn't terribly popular on Tumblr, which is why I also have a reddit account to participate in the relevant subreddit. It's also not a very big thing there, a day or two can go without a new post, and the sort of discussion that arises is obviously somewhat different than that on Tumblr, but something happened last week (and again this week) that I just have to share.

Somebody made a post about how much they disliked this one particular character because she's just so annoying and ugh they hate her every appearance! How can anyone like such a character?! The character in question is a minor antagonist who shows up about halfway through, with a clear character flaw or two (definitely a bit annoying!), and who undergoes character growth later on, but the OP in question had clearly not read that far/only watched the anime which ends much sooner.

Point is, I fucking dreaded clicking that thread--but I did nevertheless, ready to fight for my life in the comments defending her.

...Except that I didn't have to. Sure, there were a couple of comments agreeing with the OP, but they were all disliked until they were negative. The other comments were all arguing with the OP, pointing out a bunch of different things, including, but not limited to:

Since when are we not allowed to like antagonists/villains? (Plus: she's actually a very good antagonist if you think about it, which is why she's great!)

There's plenty of other (male) characters who are just as annoying or even more in different ways (And we like them just fine, so why not her?)

She's just like me, which is why I like her

She's very realistic/she's just being a teenager/I like that she's behaving like a typical 16-years-old, everybody else is too calm

Yeah she's annoying now but her character development is great, I love her

And so on. I was very, very pleasently surprised, especially when another thread with roughly the same idea but by a different person showed up this week, and got basically the same response.

Idk if this is just fans perceiving any sort of attack on a character as an attack on the series as a whole and rushing to defence due to that, and I don't particularly care. Or if my standards are too low ...

Nah, I'm just going to enjoy this. Hope something nice happens to you too!

--

:)

[kitsunefyuu]

Did you notice how some AFO fans who used to like DFO Theory started to hate it and suddenly attack the same fans? Maybe this is due to generalizing DFO as OOC? I once saw someone saying that "to respect someone else's opinion, just remember that you have also changed your opinion several times" but these people only seem to attack what they once liked for no apparent reason, other than "nooooo my beautiful AFO is not like this 😭😭"

Yes, it is a trend that I did notice when I first came into the fandom that a lot of people would say they are former DFO. Then say how they realize how 'stupid' the theory was and unrealistic. As if suddenly now they are the pinnacle of rational and totally know everything about a fictional character.

I never claim my interpretation is the canon, because I know I could end up wrong. That just how it is and I'm always willing to adjust my headcanons with the source material. But honestly I think the AFO fans that liked DFO and now hate it only changed because other people started being hostile to the theory.

Like popular writers, artist, and all kinds of people begun to sneer at that interpretation beside those in the little community. Seeing it as just trying to 'soften' AFO or as something gross to do to the MC. Or worse some people like DFO but hate AFO so when the former DFO see that they change their mind to double down on disliking DFO as they LIKE AFO. As they see it as like you said 'softening' him to make him palatable. The theory itself, however, is only parentage.

Like it still be valid to assume AFO had Izuku with Inko from a One Night stand, and Hisashi Midoriya is just the guy that stepped up for single mom Inko. We have evidence of there possibly being more aware but if don't like it then that an option too.

DFO theory is simply the theory that Izuku Midoriya is RELATED to All for One. That is the bare bones minimum, I don't care if you are OH HE LOVES HIM or HE AN EXPERIMENT or whatever you want to believe. None of that really registers much to me nor should matter, like DFO can be used in many manner of ways.

The ones that seem to hate is most... Well they tend to either want Virgin All for One (for sexual reasons) or want him to be purely asshole(for sexual or just because love assholes that can go either way) or maybe fear of being the outsider. There also many who claim that every time he does a more evil act that it PROOF he never father a child.

Like tell me you never had a mentally unstable parent that does outrageous things. Anyone can have a kid, it sure doesn't take much for a guy to one and done for various reasons. We also literally been confirmed now he can change his face, DNA, and has actually done so. Also we've seen how he is with Yoichi, literal proof of his ability to love it just dark and twisted.

It why DFO is so interesting since if is the child of AFO it an avenue to explore his character. How WOULD AFO raise a child now that we knows what happened with Yoichi? Is he aware of Izuku? Does he care? We've seen him vault family and say how precious family is.

But then, none of that matters to the former DFO fans who now are DFO hates. They just don't want to be the weirdo outsiders believing in something that isn't even 'canon' and as I've said many times. I'm not exactly going to stop writing or enjoying it even if it NOT canon.

No one can dictate what I like and enjoy. And those people projecting hatred once they loved it?

I hope they know it ok to just like different things and change your mind. They should be happy with what they like instead of just wanting to be 'right'.

[thatguywhofedme]

Ideas for feeders and feedees

I'm sure a lot of us are into feedism / death feedism for the long run, which means that any opportunities to expand our knowledge, live experiences we could have only dreamed of or even find your perfect partner who shares the same set of goals and interests as you do is always on our mind

Which is why I decided to make a small list of ideas for everyone into feedism which I hope would make it easier to find what you are looking for or at least have a starting point

Places you can visit

- Anywhere !!! : this one is pretty vague, but just go outside, get out of your comfort zone and try to do activities you wouldn't normally be doing, I'm sure you'll find opportunities to meet someone new who happens to be into feedism / death feedism

- Walmart : this one is a classic at this point, but it's always a good place to find anyone who could be into feedism just like you and I'm sure you'll find an opportunity to strike up a conversation with anyone with the same particular taste that you have and besides, who doesn't love to see a piggy on a mobility scooter doing a "small" grocery trip, speaking of which

- Grocery store : same thing as Walmart, just go in and find someone who seems to have the same interests as you and would be interested to have a little chat with you

- Pretty much any buffet or restaurant : you have LOOOOOOOTS of choices when it comes to this category of establishment for a fine gourmet such as yourself, you can go the easy route by going to McDonald, KFC or any fast food restaurants near you or your local buffet, if there's one thing all piggies have in common it's eating, LOOOOOADS of eating, especially when it's all you can eat and just a small trick,for the love of god, avoid any restaurant that serves Kale or any healthy food if you want to find a real fatty / enabler

Activities you can do

- Cooking class : no matter where it is, cooking classes are a great opportunity to find someone who 1. Enjoys food and 2. Doesn't care about the fat that keeps piling on their growing bodies, they're everywhere and it'll also teach many skills you can apply in the kitchen, whether it's to fatten yourself up or someone else

- Eating contest / competition : What else is their to say really, you got people who loves to eat lots of food in one sitting as fast or as many as possible while 99% of them don't care about the fat adding up on their figure, which they probably enjoy as well

- county fair : with all the fun activities you can do, especially the food stands on site ready to feed anyone a delicious and fattening piece of food history, your bound to meet someone who also decided to come for the same reason that you did, to find someone who wants to see how much they can stuff in their greedy mouth, with or without your help in one sitting

I know I'm missing a lot of other ideas to try and places / events to visit, but I'm sure you won't be shy to add more in the comments

With all of that said, I hope this list can help all of you with finding new opportunities in the world around you and don't forget, either you're getting fattened up or are the one doing all the fattening, the fatter the better 🐷🩷

[sofia-not-sophie]

In honor of Jason's death day I am posting a bit of a wip that will eventually turn into a Red Hood Bruce AU. (Yes there is only half an hour left today shhhh). Let me know if anyone would be interested in reading more of this kind of thing!! (Character Death tw for the whole of the text coming up, also minor panic attack of a non pov character)

Presenting:

Crossing That Line

Dick frantically punched his security code and the code for the watchtower into the zeta. Batman had sent multiple distress signals using his justice league and batcave beacon in the last ten seconds. Then all of his biometrics trackers went offline and new distress beacons stopped coming in. Bruce had been dealing with a justice league level threat for the past few days, so Dick had been taking the opportunity of a Bruce-less manor to spend time with Jason. He wasn’t looking forward to staying to babysit an injured Bruce, but at the same time Bruce was his sort of not really dad, right?

Dick wasn’t sure how long he had frozen once he saw the biometrics readings stop, but his training kicked in eventually and he was now on his way to see what he could do to help. Even if that was just standing by while someone else handled Bruce’s injuries.

He reached the watchtower and ran to the medical wing. The Justice League were all inside. Superman was sitting in a chair with yellow sunlamps trained on him, a bloody set of tears marring his suit, clearly his own blood, as Dick could see the injuries on his skin slowly healing themselves under the sunlight. He looked quite literally green around the gills, kryptonite then.

The others were around in various states of injured, but none of them were as severe as Superman’s injuries. Flash was helping Green lantern wrap a wound that probably had already been stitched up, but everyone else looked fine.

Then Dick noticed that Diana was standing at the end of a bed that had a sheet over it. There was clearly a body underneath. And Batman was the only person unaccounted for.

“Dick.” Clark said, his voice breaking.

Dick couldn’t say anything, he wordlessly moved over to the bed and pulled back the sheet. The cowl was still over Bruce’s face but it was severely damaged. Burns and scrapes and soot covered what parts of his face were visible. Dick put his ear by where Bruce’s heart should be and listened for a heartbeat.

Nothing.

Dick checked Bruce’s pulse.

Nothing.

“What happened?” Dick asked, becasue if he didn’t he might just get lost in his own thoughts and memories.

“Lex and the Joker.” Clark said, “They were making some sort of space laser together. I’m not sure to what end. I went to confront them while the others handled the guards. B, he went to dismantle the weapon. But there was a failsafe bomb. We couldn’t— We weren’t able to get to him. Not until after.”

A beep sounded someone arriving at the zeta station. A few seconds later Jason burst in in his full Robin outfit. Wait, Dick was still in his sweatpants. Not even a mask. What would Bruce say?

Dick wished he could hear Bruce tell him off for being in civilian clothes in the watchtower.

“I saw the distress record and your zeta logs.” Jason said, “What happened?”

“Jason.” Dick started and stopped, trying to put himself in between Bruce’s body and Jason.

“Can I at least see B? He’s my dad too you know.”

“Jason something really bad happened.” Dick felt the words spill out.

“What’s wrong? Where’s B?”

“He’s gone, Little Wing.” Dick bent down slightly to meet Jason’s eyes, or rather the white lenses of his mask, at level.

“No! He can’t be. He’s Batman.” Jason then seemed to notice Bruce’s still uncovered face on the bed. Jason ran the same tests that Dick had, adding in checking for breath fog on the edge of a batarang for good measure.

Jason finally pulled the sheet back over Bruce’s head and turned from the bed, he looked about three shades paler than normal. His breathing was racing and Dick noticed Clark looking at Jason with concern.

Shit. What did Bruce normally do to help with the panic attacks?

Dick silently tugged Jason to sit on the floor with his back against a wall. “Breathe, Jay. It’s gonna be alright.”

“Where am I going to go?” Jason whispered, still in a panic. It seemed to be more to himself than to Dick but Dick answered anyway.

“Breathe. You’re not going anywhere. You stay at the manor, I’ll move back in. You’re not going to get kicked out. Can you take a deep breath with me?”

Dick guided Jason’s hand to the front seam of the Robin costume so he could feel his own diaphragm move. Dick counted as he breathed in and out and slowly Jason’s breaths started to match his own.

“He’s gone.” Jason whispered.

Dick didn’t know what to say.

“How do we tell Alfred?”

Dick hadn’t thought that far ahead.

“I can tell him.” Clark said, “You kids shouldn’t have to worry about that.”

Dick nodded. Where was his voice? Part of him wanted to say that he should deliver it, he’s family, or maybe that he wasn’t a kid anymore.

“What do we do then?” Jason asked.

“Let’s go home and get you into some pajamas.” Clark said.

“I don’t want to leave him.” Dick said, looking at the sheet covering Bruce. “Alfred should have codes for the zeta to use in case of this specific issue. Have him bring the contingency files for a code dark night.”

Clark nodded and stood up. He still looked uneasy on his feet, but he got Jason to the zeta point. The rest of the League took the hint and made themselves scarce, leaving Dick alone with Bruce.

The sense of deja vu was sickening. It brought him back to the first minutes after his parents’ fall. Dick was the first one to get to them and for what felt like hours it was just him and his parents’ bodies in the middle of the ring. It hadn’t actually been that long until there were police and someone else in the circus, Dick couldn’t even remember who, was pulling him away and trying to comfort him. And then there was Bruce. Who Dick had talked to briefly that day, back then he had just been a random stranger offering condolences. Now…

Dick looked back at the sheet.

Bruce was dead.

What the hell was Dick supposed to do now?

[jjkamochoso]

In Sickness and Sadism

Not fluff, not angst, but a secret third thing... (it's Feitan from HxH, what can I say)

Feitan Portor x gn!reader with chronic illness

You can't afford your medicine. Feitan won't accept that!

Warnings: cussing, breaking of human bones, mentions of other violence (not toward reader)

"What do you mean the price went up that much?"

You were incredulous. You had been frequenting the same pharmacy in your home town since you could remember and the price for medicine had always been consistent. That's what you liked about shopping there--the owner didn't price gouge like they did in every other store. Now, you didn't know what to do. You needed to buy the damn medicine or else you would be miserable, or probably even dead. It already wasn't easy having to deal with a chronic illness and now you had to face the fact that you definitely didn't have enough money to buy something you needed to live.

"That's just how much it is now, don't cry to me about it," sneered the cashier and you felt your anger bubble up at his lack of empathy. Your life was terribly unfair and you wanted to scream, cry, and punch the smirk off the cashier in that order.

"Please, can I talk to Mr. Greck, the owner, about this? I've been coming here for years, maybe he can get me a discount," you pleaded, but the cashier just laughed at you.

"The owner has a job from which he needs to make money. Not that you would know what it's like to have money in the first place. So no, you can't waste his time begging like the poor person you are. Now get out or I'll throw you out."

You glared at him, hoping he was bluffing, but he seemed the type to follow through with hurting someone like you and you knew your body couldn't take the exhaustion, especially if you were going to be off your medicine for a while. You needed to make sure you were in good condition to work every day of the week, plus overtime, to make enough to buy your month's supply. Feeling defeated and upset, you left the building, tears falling freely.

Feitan prided himself on his distinct lack of empathy. He relished in the fact that the pain of others makes him feel warm inside. There was no better symphony of sounds than people crying and screaming for their pain to stop.

So why the fuck was he finding himself so outraged at some random person's medical predicament?

The raven haired man had stopped in to a local pharmacy to pick up (ahem... steal) some supplies for the Troupe in case anyone managed to get hurt on the latest mission. He wasn't paying attention to his surroundings for the first few minutes of his shopping spree, completely uncaring to someone else's woes of the fragility of the human body. All of a sudden, after stuffing the last roll of gauze in his sleeve, his ears perked up to listen in to the conversation happening at the front register.

"What do you mean the price went up that much?"

His eyebrows furrowed. Not that he cared, because he wasn't paying for any of his things anyway, but he did notice that the price tags here for items displayed significantly lower numbers than previous pharmacies he had visited in other areas around. You had affirmed his findings in your conversation with the cashier and Feitan felt his blood boiling at the brash rudeness coming from the cashier's mouth. Who did that scum think he was, speaking like that to someone for no reason? Feitan certainly wasn't the nicest guy around but even he had the decency to not be a total jerk to random strangers, let alone people in distress about their medical and financial woes. He didn't know why he was giving this ordeal the time of day. Maybe it was because of his upbringing? He saw this type of thing daily in Meteor City. Hell, he lived it himself. There was nothing scarier than seeing a totally healthy person decay rapidly and shrivel into nothingness, all because they were born in unfortunate circumstances. He scoffed when he saw you leaving in tears. Why didn't you just use your brain and brawn and steal it? Were you too weak? He saw your fists clenching earlier and figured you were strong enough to take down that slime ball. If you did end up getting your ass kicked, at least you didn't lie down like a dog and take it, like you were doing now. His eyes followed your frame until you left the building and he watched until your silhouette was no longer visible outside. He didn't know why he was doing this. He wasn't supposed to make a big scene whenever he was out and about, but the events were already set into motion before he could stop himself.

"5 month supply of whatever that person needed." Feitan ordered, pointing to the boxes behind the cashier's head.

The cashier just laughed at him. "You too, huh? What are you, their boyfriend or somethin'? Maybe their kid? Scrawny little thing."

Oh, he'll wish he never had a tongue to speak those words.

Feitan kept his cool, procuring a velvet bag from his person and set it on the counter with a clank emitting from the contents of inside. "I have money."

The cashier's mouth opened in a greedy smile. He quickly retrieved the 5 month supply Feitan requested and put it in a bag.

"That'll be 100,000 Jenny."

Feitan smirked under his cowl. He reached into the bag, seemingly to pull out money, but instead of coins, the cashier's outstretched hand was met with a mini hammer. The sickening crunch of bones could be heard as the man howled in pain.

"Oh? Big man can't handle small hammer?" Feitan taunted, his eyes crinkled in delight at the man's suffering. The cashier tried to reach for a gun he had stashed behind the counter but Feitan was much too fast, grabbing his wrist and turning his arm the wrong way so that, too, was broken. The cashier couldn't get a word out, instead crying out with tears running down his face.

"Don't cry to me about it." Feitan mocked the worker by using his own words against him. The shorter man hummed a bit, thinking of what to do next. He needed to finish up quickly or else he'd lose track of you and end up having done this all for nothing.

Well, this wasn't all for nothing either way. He needs to make sure he practices his methods often so he doesn't lose his edge.

Feitan grabbed the bag containing the medicine and cleaned up his own bag of tools while the cashier was lying on the floor, writhing in pain and ready to pass out. He gave him a strong kick before turning toward the door.

"Good luck getting all that fixed at hospital. If you can afford it."

You were walking down the street, dejected and unsure of what to do when you felt a nauseating presence appear behind you. You turned around to face a short man with a skull face covering offering you a bag. Naturally, you were hesitant to take it, but he nudged it to you again.

"Medicine. For you."

Your eyes widened in surprise. Did you hear the soft spoken man correctly? You tore open the bag and saw multitudes of your medicine within.

"5 months. Go get better job or learn to steal."

You went to thank him but he was already gone, disappearing like a ghost. You were thoroughly confused but at the same time, extremely grateful. You stood on the street corner in a daze until the sound of screaming could be heard somewhere close to you.

"Someone please help! This cashier's been seriously injured!"

You whipped around to see a woman running out from... the pharmacy? What exactly had that man done to get you what you needed? You were ready to run away from the scene so you weren't questioned as a suspect when you caught a glimpse of your savior once more, watching you like a hawk from the rooftop of the building next to you. He put his finger to where his lips resided under his mask, a signal to stay quiet about what happened, as he let out a short maniacal laugh and disappeared from your sight.

Feitan finally realized why he decided to help you that one day. There were many people in this world he'd gladly see rot to death and then rot even further after that.

But not you.

No, you were much too attractive to be a corpse so soon.

[green-alien-turdz]

Non-South Park vent shit

Abusive situation tw w/ sexual implications + f-slur used in a homophobic nature. me venting, n sayin things that i don't believe apply to others in similar situations, this is me hatin myself, not anyone else strugglin.

.

.

.

.

.

.

I feel like a fuckin idiot. I don't know why I can't learn a single lesson. You'd fuckin think I wouldn't keep fallin for the same traps, but I will fall in again and again and again. And I was genuinely tryna get fuckin better too. After my recent dumbass attempt, I was tryna be good to myself n then I go n just let some mf pull this kinda bs. AGAIN. I don't know what my fuckin problem is. I liked him, I really did. I hadn't seen him in 2 years, he texts me outta the blue and I genuinely thought he was just askin to catch up, but all he wanted to do was fuckin use me. He is literally the only mf I ever had a crush on, i WANTED to date him, i WANTED to be held n shit. But I fuckin understood, he wasn't into dudes, and he didn't like me much as a person. So why the fuck after 2 years come n pull this shit? I was fight or flight the whole night but couldn't get myself to fight back or run or fuckin anythin. I'm so fuckin tired. I'm so fuckin stupid. I was genuinely tryin again. But I'm fuckin done. Whatever happens, happens. Whatever choices i take, imma take em. I fuckin hate ever last fiber of myself. I feel fuckin gross, disgustin, shameful. And I fuckin should.

[silverstar70]

Fandom: Criminal minds. Character: Aaron Hotchner x fem!reader

Author’s note: English is not my first language so I apologise for any mistakes.

Warnings: smut, vaginal sex, established relationship, oral sex, fluff

Summary: Y/N comes back after months oversea and Hotch makes up for the lost time

Words: 5k

Welcome back

After ten months oversea, Y/N just wanted to lay in her bed and sleep for more than a few hours. Those months had been stressful and exhausting. After three missions in Afghanistan, she got used to the long hours, the heat, and the desert. What she wasn’t used to was missing home. She never felt at home in any of the city she was deployed. Yes, she loved moving around the planet but no one of the houses she lived in, felt like home, not by a long shot. And no one was waiting for her so she never had a reason to feel eager to go back.

Now, things were different. She had someone waiting for her back home. Her relationship with Hotch was one of the best things that ever happened to her. He was caring, kind, loving and most importantly he loved her for her. He understood her job and the long hours better than anyone else, maybe because he was as workaholic as her, but no mattered how much work he had, he always found time for her and his son Jack.

Y/N loved that boy as he was her own. She never thought she would’ve missed someone like she missed the Hotchner boys, and she couldn’t wait to come back home and hugged them. She loved her job, it was the only constant in her live since she was eighteen, her anchor in the darkest days and it still was sometimes. But now she had Hotch too.

Being away from him had been torture. They talked via Skype any time she could, but it was difficult since most of the times the signal was wonky, and it wasn’t the same thing. She missed falling asleep in his strong arms, it was her safe place. She missed his skin under her touch, his kisses, his penetrative stare. She missed feeling him close and spending the weekend with him and Jack.

She took a deep breath before the doors of the elevators opened. As soon as she landed at the base, she went straight to Hotch’s office. She couldn’t wait to see him and didn’t even bother to change clothes, so she was still wearing her uniform. He wasn’t expecting her to come back for another two days before the schedule date, it was a surprise.

As soon as she entered the bullpen, she saw the team chatting around the table in the small kitchen they had and sharing a cup of coffee. No one of them seemed to notice her presence.

“Is there a cup left for me?” She asked rhetorically, and the team gasped in surprise to see her standing in the bullpen.

“Y/N! You’re here!” Garcia shouted as she walked up to Y/N to give her a big hug. “Gosh it’s so good to see you. How are you? Does bossman knows you’re here? He’s gonna be so happy!”

“Babygirl, give her a break.” Morgan said walking past her and welcomed his friend. “Welcome back, ninja.”

“I’ve missed you so much, guys.”

“We’ve missed you too, Y/N.” JJ said while hugging Y/N, followed by Reid.

“Ciao, bella. Come stai?” Rossi welcomed her with a double kiss on the cheek and a cup of hot coffee. “Ecco il tuo caffè.”

Y/N happily took the mug and had a sip. It wasn’t the best coffee she had ever drunk but it was certainly better than the one she had during her mission oversea. “Grazie, Dave. Ne avevo davvero bisogno.”

“Guys, English please.” Morgan complained knowing that if didn’t get stopped Dave and Y/N would’ve started having an entire conversation in Italian and to him it was annoying. The team laughed at his tantrum and returned their attention to Y/N.

“So, how was the desert?” Garcia asked curious.

“Hot.” Y/N joked “Tell me about you, guys. What did I miss?”

“Nothing new. Catching the bad guys here and there.” JJ replied.

Being too caught in the moment, catching up, none of them realized that their boss walked into the bullpen. Hotch stopped in his track as he recognized the woman in front of him. He couldn’t believe she was finally here, he dreamed about this moment for weeks. Like a teenager, he felt the heart leaving his chest at the happiness of having her back.

“Y/N” he said her name in a whisper and as Y/N heard herself getting called from behind, she turned in the direction of that voice and saw that Hotch was standing there with a mixed look of surprise and shock.

“Surprise” she greeted him with a wide smile.

Without wasting time, Hotch embraced her and spun her around a few times. Holding her close as he was scared that the moment he left her, she would leave again. He sniffed her hair having missed her scent over the ten months. He had missed her like crazy. It was strange waking up in the morning without having her by his side.

Once he put her down, he kept holding her close for a few moments, until he heard someone clearing their throat behind them. He had completely forgot that the team was there but couldn’t care less. Y/N was back in his arms. The team’s embarrassment could wait.

“I guess someone is very happy to see you again, Y/N.” Rossi teased, looking toward the couple, and winked to Hotch who rolled his eyes at his words.

“He had been miserable all these months.” Morgan added.

Hotch didn’t care to reply, the only thing he cared about was her. His could have said whatever they wanted, he wasn’t even listening, he was focused on her. It was like the rest of the people in the room disappeared the moment she was in his arms again.

They laughed and chatted for a little more. She enjoyed spending time with his team because she knew how much they meant to him. They were a family, and she could see it every time they hang out altogether. She recalled the first time she had met them; she was terrified they wouldn’t like her; she changed her clothes three times that night and every time Hotch reassured her it only made it worst. To her surprise though, the team was wonderful with her and soon they made her feel part of the family. Hotch and Y/N said their goodbyes and headed up to the elevators, leaving the team behind.

The ride to her house was silent, Hotch was holding her hand and caressing her thumb as the anticipation was growing in both of them. To him it still felt unreal that she was there in his car. He would never admit to his team and especially to Rossi, but they were right; the past ten months had been torture for him, not knowing how she was or if something had happened to her made him miserable.

Arriving at her house, he parked the car in her driveway and walked her to the door after he helped her taking all the bags in the trunk. Once she unlocked the door and entered the house, she left the bags on the ground and turned to Hotch who was standing hesitant on the doorway.

“Are you not coming in?” Y/N questioned him with furrowed eyebrows.

“You need to rest. I’ll see you tomorrow.” He offered and turned to leave.

“Aaron” Y/N called after him and get his attention back “Stay. Please. I want you to stay. I’ve missed you and I don’t wanna wait until tomorrow.”

“You sure?”

She smiled and nodded slightly. He walked slowly back to her and grabbed her face between his hands resting his lips on hers. She held him tighter to her by his t-shirt and they kissed there on the doorway for several moments until air became a need.

They enter the house and once Hotch closed the door, he was on her again and she jumped on him, wrapping her legs around his waist. Their lips connected again, and she ran her hands through his hair pulling a little making him groaned in the kiss. He quickly carried her to the bedroom never breaking the kiss.

Standing in front of each other, Hotch slowly started getting rid of her t-shirt. Their lips reconnected quickly but in a more passionate way, taking their time to taste each other. She opened her mouth leaving him the control, her head was resting between his strong hands as her hands were traveling along his back.

Hotch kept kissing her slow and passionate but deep down he was eager to devore her. He didn’t get the chance to do it for too long and even thought they became experts in phone sex, it wasn’t quite the same. He needed to feel her close, to smell her soft skin and take his time to kiss every inch of her body.

His hands left her face and found her belt, that he got rid of in a mere of time throwing somewhere on the floor. She followed every move he was making waiting patiently for him to take her. She was craving his touch more than she could ever imagine. She missed the feeling of his rough, yet gentle, hands on her skin, it always made her feel like she was burning inside from excitement.

Y/N took off her pants, sat on the bed and pushed Hotch to her pulling him by his belt. She started to unbuckle it, looking straight into his eyes. Hotch smiled and caressed her cheek. His look was full of desire and lust, he was almost begging her to hurry up since she was going purposely slow. His cock was starting to feel tight in his jeans. He quickly got rid of his jeans and t-shirt as soon as she finished, standing in front of her just in his boxers.

She could see the outline of his cock and reflexively bite her lower lip. Y/N wanted to taste him right there, he was in the perfect position and went to grab his boxers to free him but was stopped by his strong hands who grabbed firmly her wrists. Hotch knew what she wanted to do, he'd lie if he said he didn't want it too, but he had other plans.

“Later. Now lay back.” He demanded.

She did what she was told, not without a bit of disappointment. As she saw Hotch getting on his knees between her legs, a shiver went through her spine and groaned at the anticipation, he smiled at the effect he had on her. Even after ten months, the desire never faded away, it only increased. And he was ready and determinate to make up for the lost time.

Hotch grabbed the sides of her panties and slid them down her legs, agonizingly slowly and threw them somewhere across the room. And pushed her legs as far apart as he could, making her gasp at the sudden move. He placed a soft kiss on her hip, going further down to kiss the space of skin where the thigh met the hip and groaned.

“Please, Aaron” she pleaded, squirming a little under his kiss.

“Please what, baby?” Hotch asked mischievously, caressing her leg with his fingertips.

“Eat me!”

Hotch smirked and without wasting more time, his mouth started to devour her pussy moaning at the way she tasted. The vibration sent a jolt through her body and made her squirmed under him. He was savoring her like a starved man, and he was so good with his mouth that she never wanted him to stop.

“Oh God!” Y/N moaned loudly, as she felt pleasure filling her body. Her hand was, once again, in his hair pulling a little. He groaned at the feeling and that only increased her pleasure.

He knew she was close; he could feel it and couldn’t wait for her to cum and finally get to taste her again after so long. As he took a breath, one of his hands found her entrance and felt how wet she was, making her groaned more.

“Please don’t stop.” She whimpered.

At her surprise, Hotch pushed two fingers inside her, leaving her out of breath. He started moving them back and forth with a fast pace. Her orgasms kept building in her stomach as he maintained the pace.

“Yes, like that!”

Immediately, his lips were on her; his tongue was moving around her clit, sucking hard. His tick fingers were deeper in her. The combo was enough to send her over the edge as a strong wave of pleasure hit her.

“Oh shit! Aaron!” she came hard on his mouth as he kept tasting her. Hotch rode her orgasm never stopping his movements and in a mere of seconds she cum for the second time that night, arching her back.

“Fuck!” she groaned loudly.

Hotch smirked at the view and pulled out his fingers from her to get up and admire more of her. She hissed at the loss of contact. As she recovered from coming down form her high, they locked eyes and smiled to each other.

“Mmm.” He groaned as he pushed his fingers into his mouth “You taste so good, baby.”

Without losing her gaze, Hotch slowly slipped out of his boxers giving her a small show. She watched him with look that he knew all too well; lust and craving were in her eyes as she bit her lower lip while observing him. Hotch climbed over her, as Y/N positioned herself in the middle of the bed.

“Hi, Mr. Hotchner.”

“Hi, Ms. Y/L/N.” he bent to capture her lips so she could taste herself on him. “I’m not done with you.”

“I hope so.” She whispered smirking against his lips and felt him hardening against her. She smiled at the effect she had on him. Taking advantage of the distraction and with her legs around his waist, Y/N pushed Hotch on the mattress, ending up on top of him. He was taken by surprise but didn’t complain, he loved when she was in control.

Hotch smirked at her and pulled Y/N in a hot and wet kiss, keeping her head firmly between his hands. Her body react to that kiss as she felt a shiver along her spine, making her wetter by the second. Hotch’s hands were caressing her thighs, as she slowly got her bra undone freeing her breasts. His eyes went wide at the view, lust and desire filled his body and she could feel the effect under her.

“I need you” Hotch whispered. Y/N lifted a little for a better access and his cock slid easily inside her as wet as she was. They groaned in unison at the feeling. As he was deep inside her, she paused for a moment hesitant to move since it has been a while. He seemed to understand and gave her an empathetic smile.

“Take your time, baby.” he reassured her softly, and she nodded.

She bent over to give him a tender kiss as his hand tangled in her hair. Y/N started rocking her hips on him slowly, agonizingly slowly, making both moaning in the kiss. She moved like that for a few minutes to adjust again to his thick size.

“Oh God” she whimpered.

For him it wasn’t different. He groaned at every move she made. Her inner muscles were tightening around him, making him groan out of pleasure. Soon he started moving up, meeting her thrusts midway. The only things that could’ve been heard in the room was their skin slapping onto each other, the groans and the heavy breaths.

Y/N stood up to face him and started moving faster on him, taking him every time deeper. She felt her orgasm starting to build in her stomach. As he read her mind, Hotch’s quickly found its way between her legs meeting her clit and started moving his fingers in circle faster and faster.

“Don’t stop, Hotch!” she moaned loudly. He let out a low groan knowing she was close and moved faster.

“Cum for me, baby” he urged rubbing her clit, begging for her release.

Y/N pushed back on him a few more time before a strong wave of pleasure hit her hard. She loved how well he knew her body, how he could make her cum so effortlessly. He always knew how to move with her to give her the pleasure she deserved.

“Oh wow!” she whispered coming down from her orgasm, trying to catch her breath. For his point of view, Hotch took a moment to admire her. She was always beautiful in his eyes but the way she looked post an orgasm always drove him crazy and made him want to give her more pleasure.

She captured his lips once again and Hotch took the chance to roll them over again, making her gulped. He covered her body with his as he remained inside her. He kissed her one more time as his hand traveled along her body and meet her left breast. Hotch cupped it and begging to massage it carefully, stroking her nipple with his thumb. She moaned at the feeling, craving for more.

He went kissing down her neck, on her soft spot. He continued his way down her body, leaving wet kisses all over her chest. As he kept playing with one nipple, he took the other into his mouth making her groaned. He played with both her breasts while her hands were scratching him a little on his back.

“A-Aaron” she moaned softly.

“What do you want?”

“You” she urged. He smirked and stood between her legs. Hotch took his cock and begun sliding it over her entrance. He wanted nothing more than have her right there. He entered her slowly wanting to let her feel every inch of him. They both groaned and he gave her a very little time to adjust and started thrusting deep inside her, increasing the pace every time more.

“Fuck, baby.” Hotch groaned “I’ve missed you so much.”

As she felt the familiar feeling in her stomach, a shiver went through all her body. She wanted to tell him how much she had missed him too. But was too caught in the moment to even think straight, the words didn’t seem to want to come out from her mouth, just moaning and groanings.

She felt the pleasure filling her and wrapped her legs around him to pull him closer and deeper. She was close and he could feel it by the way she was clenching around him. He pounded into her with everything he had while one hand reached for her clit and started rubbing it again in circles, making her squirm under him.

“Oh yes!” Y/N cried out loud as she came hard again. Hotch slowed down his pace enjoying the view of his lover and give her time to recover. Out of breath and still high, Y/N pulled him over her and kissed him deeply holding his head between her hands.

“I’ve missed you too, honey.” She whispered against his lips, and he smiled. His hand was traveling up and down her side with the fingertips brushing her skin. Y/N’s hands were tangled in his hair pulling them a little and making him groaned.

The open mouth wet kisses all over her chest were increasing her desire. His gentle touch was sending jolts to her core as he wrapped the legs tighter around him. He knew she wanted more but he took his time to feel every inch of her soft skin under him. After so many months they really felt connected again, there wasn’t a display between them anymore. It was just them now.

Suddenly, he thrusts hard into her, making her gasped. Before she had time to react, Hotch started moving deliciously slow as he felt her muscles tightening around him every time more.

“Please make me cum, Hotch.”

She was getting closer as he went deeper. Hotch stood up and gripped forcefully her hips, pounding harder on her. He groaned loudly at the feeling of her wet and tight pussy. She was driving him crazy as much as he was driving her crazy.

“You like that, baby?”

“Oh, yes!” she moaned “You feel so good. Don’t stop.”

One of his hands found his way between them and reached for her clit one more time and he started to rub it faster and faster making her squirm under him. She arched her back at the mixed emotions that were going through her body. Pleasure, ecstasy, joy, love, pride, all provoked by the same man. No one had ever made her feel the way he did.

He groaned knowing he was close too but didn’t stop working on her.

“Cum with me, Y/N”

He slammed into her harder a few more time before he finally released himself inside her. That, combined with his fingers still rubbing her clit, was enough to send her over the edge.

“Fuck!”

“God!”

Hotch collapsed on top of her, and she wrapped her arms around him wanting to feel him as close as possible. Waiting for their breath to return to normal, Hotch left a few tender kisses down her neck while her hands were playing with his soft hair.

They stood like this for several minutes, enjoying each other’s company in the silence of the room before Hotch rolled off her and laid next to her. He opened his arm for her offering to rest her head on his chest and she happily accepted, snuggling onto him.

“It’s good to have you back” he said breaking the silence and she looked up to him with a wide smile on her face.

“It’s good to be back” Y/N assured him softly and pecked his lips.

“I love you so much.” He took a deep breath, not sure if continue but did it anyway “I was terrified of losing you. I’ve been miserable since you left and didn’t have the courage to admit it. I knew you were doing your job and couldn’t be prouder of you, but every time you leave--“

Y/N abruptly interrupted him with a deep kiss.

“I’m here now. You have nothing more to worry about.”

He smiled softly and kissed her again, cupping her cheek with his hand and caressing it a little.

“You need to sleep now.” Hotch said before kissing her forehead. She nodded slightly and fell asleep at the sound of his heartbeat. A sound she had missed and never failed to make her feel safe.

As the hours passed by, Y/N didn’t seem to find the right position to sleep. Everything seemed to distract her; the lights coming from outside were too bright, the wind, waving the leaves, was too loud. The bed was more comfortable that she remembered, she kept tossing and touring around trying to put much effort to shut her mind and fall asleep, but every attempt got wasted.

She reached for her phone on her nightstand to check the time. It was 2:30 am. She turned to face Hotch who was peacefully sleeping, snoring lightly. She scoffed at herself at the thought of how much she had missed earing that sound. It used to drive her crazy when she was trying to sleep, and now she could hear his softly snoring for hours.

Y/N watched him sleeping for quite sometimes thinking that it would’ve helped her fall asleep but didn’t seem to work. She climbed out of the bed and put on her panties and the shirt he wore and walked to the kitchen, trying to be as quiet as possible to not wake Hotch. Once there, she opted for a chamomile, hoping that it could help her. She sat on the counter waiting for the water to boil and was too caught in her thoughts that she didn’t notice a sleepy Hotch appearing in the room, wearing only his boxers.

“Can’t you sleep?” he asked softly while walking to her.

“No.” Y/N reached for his hand and offered him to stood between her legs and he happily accepted. “It’s not easy to get used to the city again. I kinda miss the desert.”

They shared a laugh before he bent to kiss her lips gently.

“I hope I didn’t wake you.”

“No. I turned around and you weren’t there.” He assured her and she smiled.

Y/N captured his lips again and deepened the kiss by taking his head in her hands. He groaned in the kiss and pushed himself into her a bit more grabbing her on the hips. In a mere of seconds, the kiss became hot and desperate. Both were eager for more contact. Their wandering hands were traveling on each other’s body. She felt the heat in her body caused by his touches.

Their session was interrupted by the sudden whistling of the electric kettle, warning that the water was boiled. Hotch hadn’t even noticed the thing on the stove and looked at Y/N with a questioning look.

“I was making some chamomile.” She explained.

“I’ll make you a cup.”

“Actually, I prefer what we were doing.” she smirked at him. Hotch looked at her with a devilish smile and turned off the stove before kissing her again. She wrapped her legs around his waist to pull him closer and felt his already hardening cock against her. He quickly got rid of his t-shirt that she was wearing and assaulted her neck leaving a wet kiss on it and making her shift a little back on the counter.

“Aaron.” She moaned as he kissed down her neck and started giving attention to her breasts, taking one in his mouth, sucking hard, while massaging the other. Her head tilted back as her body was filled of pleasure and her minds was too caught in the moment to think straight.

“Oh God! I need you!” she urged as her hands pulled his hair a little to get his attention.

“What do you need, baby?” he asked, knowing full well the answer but loved to hear her saying it. She groaned annoyed but played along.

“Please. I need you to fuck me!”

No needing to be told twice, Hotch lowered his boxers just enough to free his hard cock and shifted her panties to the side. He slid his dick over entrance a few times to feel how wet she was and entered her slowly, making both of them groaning at the feeling.

“You feel so good, sweetheart.” He whimpered. He started moving right after, going deep inside her. Every thrusts were perfectly placed to give her the most pleasure possible. He knew how to move to satisfy her, and she was amazed by how well he knew her body.

“Oh God! Don’t stop!” she moaned pushing him closer to her, using her legs.

The familiar feeling in her stomach was starting to build again, her inner muscles were tightening around him. He groaned and it took all his strength not to come right away.

“God, Y/N.”

One of his hands moved to her clit and started rubbing in circle, faster and faster, adding more pleasure. With a few more deep thrusts, he sent her over the edge, making her squirm under him.

“Fuck!” she moaned loudly.

He gave her very little time to rest and without notice he slammed hard into her, making her gasped in surprise. He pounded inside her with everything he had. His hand started working on her clit again as she wrapped her legs around him pulling him closer. She knew he was close too; she could feel it from the way his other hand was tightening on her hip.

“Cum for me, Aaron.”

“Together.” He said in a low groan. A few more thrust well placed, combined with his fingers working on her, and they both were hit by a strong wave of pleasure, reaching the edge, and groaning each other’s name in unison. Hotch stopped moving to give themselves time to catch their breath before bending over Y/N and lifted her chin to kiss her lips deeply.

When they parted, he kissed her forehead and caressed her cheek with his thumb. In his eyes, she saw all his love and tenderness. She could get lost in his gaze for hours, admiring those beautiful hazel eyes.

It always amazed her how he could be so stern at work and then at home he was so gentle and loving. She understood why he built this kind of a shield; it was the job who required it, and she did the same. But she was glad that he was comfortable enough to lose it when she was with her.

Without further waiting, Hotch slipped out of her making her gasped at the loss of contact. He picked her up from the counter as she wrapped her legs around him and walked to the bedroom. He gently laid her on her side of the bed and quickly climbed behind her and covered them both with the sheets.

With her back against his chest, Hotch wrapped an arm around her waist and pulled Y/N impossibly closer to him. He could smell the scent of her vanilla shampoo and remembered how much he had missed this. Having her this close still felt like a dream even thought he knew she was there, and he planned to enjoy every second of her presence.

“You’re so much better than chamomile.” She joked and heard him laugh behind her right before he placed a tender kiss on her neck.

“Sleep now. Goodnight, baby.”

“Night. Love you.” She mumbled softly.

“I love you too. Welcome back.” She smiled as those were the last words she heard before falling asleep in his arms, feeling safe. Hotch thought how lucky he was and fall asleep a few minutes after her, smiling at the sound of her gently snoring.

[triassictriserratops]

So I just had to unfortunately block someone for being rude in the comments of one of my posts. Since I blocked them and the conversation is gone I'll put the conversation down below in the interest of fairness. I feel like this person is probably pretty young and still learning so i'd like to extend them some grace. If they are willing to learn to be kinder in fandom spaces then I am willing to hear them out and unblock them. Until then, my blog is a safe space for me and for anyone else who would like to have fun and be respectful about it. I know that I say a lot of nonsense. I know that what I joke about or the things I share aren't for everyone. I'm not for everyone. (Hell, sometimes i'm not even my OWN cup of tea.) AND THAT'S OKAY. You are under no obligation to follow me, interact with me, or even let me follow you or interact with you if who I am and how I joke makes you uncomfortable. But you do owe others kindness and respect as long as they show you that kindness and respect in turn. In this case, this person did not show up to me as their best self and so I chose to disengage and to block. If this happens again with anyone else, I will do the same. (Also with the caveat that changed behavior can lead to being unblocked, because I DO believe in giving people the space and time to change and do better.)

[lovelyherruins]

omg sometimes I forget team black ARE real people and not just mindless bots.

half the issues in hotd didnt even involve alicent, if anything they already existed before she entered the picture. antis says she should've minded her own business but then not mention Harwin, Larys, and Joffrey.

If Harwin just kept it in his pants instead of becoming the crown princess' side hoe (because that's what he is) then the whole Strong boys and arguements wouldn't have happened.

Do I have to explain Larys??

I brought Joffrey up for one reason and it's this:

it wasn't necessary but did it cause the riot that happened? no, you know what did tho? Joffrey openly talking about his and Criston's "relationships" with the people getting married. was that necessary for him to do? no it wasn't because it what world WOULD it be needed for some guy to talk to Kingsguard's secret relationship with the princess?

Those three MEN should've minded their business not alicent. when she asked Rhaenyra questions it was her job or her being a friend which leads me to :

perhaps alicent wasn't but the same thing could be said about Rhaenyra (lying on her mother's grave anyone?? just being over all Brat when Alicent TRIED to fix them??). the thing is they were both in bad situations in which they had little to no control in. Neither can be blamed for how they tried to help themselves or how they acted under pressure as KIDS. people seem to forget that alicent was also a child and always say "she was older in the books!" tell me when you ever picked up that book. the show is clearly different to the books why keep bringing up alicent's age? to justify hating her as a child.

HER PROBLEMS WAS CAUSED BY THE MEN IN HER LIFE!!!!

who forced her to go to the king's chambers and wear her mother's dress? Her dad. Who had the power to NOT marry her but did it anyway? Viserys. Who mistook her (understandable) missing of her father as a reason to kill his father and brother? fucking Larys. Who impregnated her and when she had sons, did nothing to support her or to fix the problems arising with the birth of male heirs? Viserys.

"they were friends not lovers"

friends not lovers, guys!!

friends not lovers.

of course it's never openly stated that they were in love but considering that the actors (who know the characters best) said there was an underlying romance between them and it was purposeful... you can't blame others for shipping them because as they said it was THERE.

while it was a big jump that alicent took with his words, I prefer to see what she did as less of a cunning act and more of an act of desperation. a way to avoid the incoming fighting that'll happen when the word gets out.

I'm not sure if the commenter is blaming the dance on alicent but can we for a second remember that alicent was going against her dad to bring back aegon? the council already had plans to sit aegon at the throne, alicent's misunderstandings did nothing to change that.

if rhaenyra ascending the throne wouldn't have cause a civil war, then Jace ascending it definitely would have because let's not forget being anti-bastard was not a thing Alicent created, everyone was against them.

Team black stans will call themselves feminists and say they support women's rights but when Alicent is shown to them, they scream internalized misogyny and call her a cunt. are you a feminist or do you just like seeing women agree with you and your views? to fit into the mold you made for feminism

alicent is a great example of the oppression of women in any time period and the greatest show of WHY women need feminism, and antis don't even give her grace

they uplift and praise the women who already have power and freedom and put down everyone else who doesn't have those things. that tells me more about their character and beliefs than whatever color they identify as.

[home2venus]

SWALLOW YOUR PRIDE

── ˖✮⋆˙꒰ pairing ꒱ ˒˓ jungkook x han so-hee ˒˓ seven music video universe  summary. a missing scene from the seven music video, from the perspective of freshly heartbroken jungkook genre/tags. pining, post-break up, (not so) unrequited love, incredibly whipped jungkook ─ this is jungkook's perspective of my other seven fic! read them here ⋆｡°༄˖°.🪐

Jeon Jungkook may have fucked up.

He’s not afraid to admit that, and neither is anyone else. Latto had cackled when he told her what happened, all broken up about being broken up with. She’s usually pretty cool about things, on his side, but she’s real with him too. The guys were kinder about it, but the general consensus was that Jungkook has maybe, definitely, fucked up.

So, it’s a messy situation, but it’s not impossible to fix. Jungkook’s a crafty guy, and he’s dedicated to everything he puts his mind to, so he’s sure that if he really tries, and really works hard he can fix this. He wants to fix it, desperately, because... well, because of everything. She’s everything.

She was everything. 

He needs to fix it. He needs to fix them. He can fix it, he knows he—

“Should leave her alone, right?”

“What?” Jungkook asks, snapping out of his thoughts. He’s sitting at a barstool, head in his hands with his elbows resting on the counter. He looks over to Latto, supremely unimpressed.

“She doesn’t want you, baby,” Latto shrugs, leaning next to him, eyes scanning the dancefloor absently as though she’s not actively ruining Jungkook’s life, “Give her some space, at least, before you rocket back into shit.”

“I need her to know—”

“You need to not push her into filing a restraining order,” Latto insists, rolling her eyes fondly. Jungkook pouts slightly, and she pats him on the shoulder, already walking away from him. He watches her leave, a little miffed and a little resigned because Latto is probably, definitely right, but he doesn’t want her to be.

“Then what should I do?” He yells at an already halfway gone Latto.

“Go home?” Latto yells back, “Go to therapy?” She disappears into the crowd, but he can hear her laughing to herself. 

So, Jungkook goes home. On the same train that he always does. At the same time as he always does. Jungkook, from the future, would like to claim that these factors make what happened next 100%, completely, absolutely, not his fault.

Jungkook steps on the train, emptier than usual but still bustling with people, and grabs the first empty seat he can find, sighing with relief as he just narrowly avoids standing in the shadow of a fairly gross looking businessman. He readjusts, stretching slightly as the train begins to move, and as he settles in his seat, he looks around the train and—

“You have got to be kidding me.”

Han So-hee is still as beautiful as the day they met, and still as devastating as the day she left.

“Um,” Jungkook says, and she rolls her eyes, beginning to stand.

“Excuse me,” So-hee starts to stand, looking to the people around her, “Do you want my s—”

The train shakes abrubtly, slamming her back into her seat, and she sighs, resigned and exhausted. She settles back into her seat, putting her earbuds back in with a pointed glare at him.

“Don’t say anything,” She bites out the words, like they’re painful, and they are painful, but more for Jungkook than her. Jungkook just nods, quiet and understanding. So-hee blinks, a little taken aback, but then she just rolls her eyes and returns back to her phone. Jungkook returns back to his too, but it’s absent, like he’s not fully there because he isn’t.

A different Jungkook wouldn’t have listened. He would’ve kept talking, pestered her into laughing and letting him back into her home, like he always did after arguments. But, current Jungkook knows he can’t do that anymore, that he did it one too many times, during an argument that was a little too serious, and now he can’t go back to her home, to what he always considered home, because he pushed her too far.

She gets off before him, because she always does. He can see the exact route she’ll take home in his head, memorized from nights where they stumbled back home together, drunk and giggly.

“I love you,” Jungkook says. He’s not sure if she hears him, but it doesn’t matter. He just needs to say it.

Through the departing train’s window, he watches her glance backward at him, before disappearing off the platform as a whole, into the streets of the city where she lives without him. 

Jungkook goes back to his apartment, and he realizes that he can’t live without her. Jungkook also realizes that she can live without him, that she doesn’t need him in the same way, and he wants to let her have that. He wants to try again, but he doesn’t want her to hate him.

So, Jungkook resolves to let her leave. 

Unfortunately, nothing is ever that easy. But, Jungkook would like to say that it’s not his fault.

Jungkook takes the same train he did when he was with her, because that’s the train he’s always taken, so he sees her constantly. Okay, whatever, that’s fine.

But, Jungkook goes to the same restaurants that he used to go to in university, back when him and So-hee would spend weekends and nights finding new, exciting places to eat, because he always goes to the restaurants. So-hee goes to them too, because she found them with him and has all the rights too, so he sees her at the restaurants and it’s hard to explain to every old woman behind the counter that no, they aren’t together anymore and haha, yeah, it’s all good, he just misses her more than he thinks he would miss his own lungs in his chest. So, he just... doesn’t tell them, and neither does she, and everyone still thinks they’re in love, so sometimes they sit across from each other in a restaurant booth to avoid any questions.

For practicality’s sake. 

Um. Anyways.

He sees her at the laundromat, and at this point, he misses her like the Earth would miss the Sun if it imploded in the sky. She’s in an old blue denim jacket from years ago, with her hair loose around her shoulders and messy as she slams around a laundry basket, clearly sick of him. He can’t help himself from looking though, swinging his legs atop his own washing machine, watching her load her clothes into the machine. His eyes catch on a faded sweatshirt he used to have years ago, his university logo faded and worn on the front of it, and he immediately averts his eyes. If she knows that he knows, she’ll give it back, because she’ll be embarrassed. The sweatshirt is proof he’s still something to her, he’s still useful, so if she gives it back, it’s one less sign that she doesn’t actually loathe him. He wants her to keep it, so he doesn’t say anything, not until the room starts to flood and they’re pushing at the ceiling.

I love you, he almost says when they make it out, and she starts on her way home, still soaked and angry. 

I love you, he almost says when he texts her about the police assuming her laundry was his, because his wallet had still been in her laundry basket. 

I love you, he almost says when she opens the door and lets him, and the laundry but mostly him, into her apartment and offers him coffee on instinct. 

Her cats brush at his hands and he coos at them like everything is normal, and she asks him about Jimin and work and if he could talk to the others about bringing her neice into the studio, and when he agrees, she says that she literally loves him, and Jungkook shatters.

“I love you,” Jungkook says, and So-hee doesn’t say it back, but she smiles a little bit, and lets him leave on his own, without slamming the door behind him. 

Things aren’t perfect, she doesn’t run back to him with open arms and beg to be married, but when he enters the place they used to study late into the night, begging the shop owner for just one more ramen bowl and a few more minutes, she takes her bag off the opposite seat, and doesn’t glare at him when he accidentally mumbles to himself too loud while working.

It’s not perfect, but it’s close, and missing her when she’s close is better than missing her when she’s far. At least she’s still in reach, and at least she still lets him look at her.

“I love you,” He says, without even thinking about it, and she doesn’t even look up.

“Yeah, yeah,” She says, the first aknowledgement since she broke up with him months ago, “Have you considered putting that energy into a job?”

“You’re better than a job,” Jungkook says, teasing but light, like she’ll shutter away if it’s not just a graze of a joke. She gives him a look, and he thinks shit, because oh no, oh god, he’s fucked it all up again and he—

“I’m better than everything,” She says back, a small smile playing on her face, a clear indication of her joke, “Get a better excuse.”

Jungkook misses her more than anything. Her eyes, and her hair, and her hands, and her cats, and her food, and her brain, but more than anything, he misses the way she makes him laugh out of nowhere.

He laughs, because of course he does, loud and disruptive, and it turns into choking giggles when the old ladies nearby shush him loudly. His eyes are shut, blinking rapidly to get away his tears, even though it really wasn’t that funny. It’s a mix of shock, and delight, and nostalgia making him inconsolably laugh, but his distraction stops him from noticing the way she grins fondly.It’s not an I love you, but it’s close, and he missed it. He missed everything about her. All he wants to do is get it back, and actually see it, see her, again.