#or expecting a deus ex machina because I guarantee you

[ocean-stuck]

what pisses me off is that all the pieces for an actually good show were there, and instead sotsu wasted its runtime on redundant scenes and dumb arguments about studying

the rest of the club basically only existed to be victims of torture porn. it's a shame; given that by the start of sotsugyou satoko has apparently looped so many times that the original villains consistently have changes of heart, you'd think it'd only be a matter of time before they'd start remembering the new loops with enough clarity to do something meaningful. it stuck out to me that the new loops were punishing them for things that would've been the right decision in the original ones, so i was sure that even if they didn't recall enough to piece together what was going on, this might bite satoko in the ass by making future loops devolve in a way she couldn't control. that would've given those arcs some point beyond pointlessly baiting newcomers, but no

it makes hanyuu's assertions about creating miracles nonsensical, that miracles aren't spontaneously conjured by deus ex machina but born from the concentrated efforts of people. this is obviously taken from the vn where it's true and the entire thrust of kai, but here it's laughable because...the exact opposite happens. no one's actions lead rika to the truth, instead she just spontaneously remembers a thing that happened without even actively looking for whatever dragged her back into this nightmare

and oh satoko. i sincerely wish the people still insisting it was deeper than what we got would stop deluding themselves already, but on the other hand i feel bad for their wasted effort and wish they'd been right because that'd be a way better story than this joke. just...i liked the spectacle of the fight in sotsu ep 14 and i wish it existed in a better show, but immediately i noticed the actual substance was literally just a retread of their fight in satokowashi, only worse because at this point you'd think they'd be different people. and they still won't shut the fuck up about "but muh studying!!!" like, the first time i was willing to believe satoko was just putting her foot in her mouth, but in the climactic fight where emotions are at their highest and the girls are ostensibly finally seeing eye to eye and learning to resolve their differences? i half-expected satoko to turn to the camera and go "you still think this is about my stupid grades???" but no, she and the framing have decided that that is what it is, actually

(and rika isn't even like "bitch you've been murdering me and our friends!!" like i know witches have a fucked up view on non-looping people, where they're like pets in the best of circumstances and the versions that aren't what the witch wants are seen as less "real", but you'd think it'd still suck enough for rika to be salty about it)

and there was so much else they could make it about. even just focusing on st. lucia, since whoever was at the wheel mysteriously forgot all of satoko's other trauma that might give her abandonment issues serious enough for this to be thinkable, they could've focused on the culture and the faculty being so cold and punishing that even if satoko were good at studying, or just timeloop-cheated her way through class, there was no guarantee she wouldn't be miserable anyway. (to say nothing of the oft-observed fact that shion, satoko's nee-nee, would know all this but didn't say anything when there was no sign of something stopping her. even if she couldn't come to town for some reason, did eua make landlines not exist??)

and we're supposed to see her as troubled and conflicted, but instead of ever showing us this they just give us endless shots of ooo spoopy eyes and padding that answers questions that didn't need answering. earthenterran basically summed up how this could be better, but if they wanted this "satoko is at such war with herself that her internal conflict externalizes itself and creates lambda" angle, they needed to actually show her at war with herself beyond a couple sad faces that can be counted on one hand. have her hesitate repeatedly, throughout both satokowashi and sotsu. hell, they could even have an internal monologue scene with a second satoko whispering rationalizations, giving people a holy shit moment when this second satoko physically manifests in the sea of fragments while also priming the curious on the mechanics of umineko, the way witches work and the nature of its fantasy as something that can be either literal or metaphorical

instead, the only way they could've blundered this further is if they gave satoko a moustache to twirl

i can't imagine this was the story sotsugyou was intended to be, and one wonders if jun is different specifically to avoid repeating it. if i created something this atrocious, it'd take a legally binding contract to stop me from disowning it at this point

[aros001]

Read through light novel vol. 16. Random thoughts.

"Who is this OC looking f**kboy?"

Those were genuinely my first thoughts upon seeing the art of Takt on the throne. And it would seem my immediate dislike was not unfounded.

Seriously though, everything about him is like someone's self-insert original character for their shitty power fantasy Shield Hero fanfic.

"He dresses really cool, like all modern with jeans and pockets, and he can use all the holy weapons and vassal weapons, and his level is above 300, and he has a harem of totally hot powerful women, and he's the king of his own country, and he can counter everything that people use against him, and he can steal powers he doesn't have, and he can beat Naofumi and all the other heroes with, like, no sweat at all!"

I want All For One to come in and kick this little twerp's ass. Show him what a real OP villain who can steal powers is like.

This isn't a critique of the writing by the way. It feels like Takt is supposed to feel like that kind of character who plays to those tropes and is REALLY easy to hate.

I both do and don't like how Naofumi is acting in the prologue. Obviously I don't like specifically what he's doing because it's creepy and uncomfortable, but I really like the reasons for why. The dude is fried from everything that's happened and unlike Itsuki it's not because of a curse. He's grieving from a heavy loss, easily the biggest he's had since coming to this world, and unlike with Ost's death he has no one he can yet focus his anger on, so he's feeling completely lost and mixed up. Another great moment from Sadeena in helping him regain at least some of his sanity. Sex is a common way people try to find comfort after a terrible loss and if that had been the case I think she would have slept with him or even encouraged Raphtalia to be the one for that. But she could see pretty clearly that wasn't the case. Naofumi wasn't looking for comfort. He was practically a zombie, just going through the motions.

“It seems that from among the four holy heroes, the Shield and Bow have been most active over there. Based on their level of activity, there’s also a bias in the legends about the seven star heroes. They mainly talk about the Hammer, Claws, and Whip.” A bias. The Shield and Bow did complement each other well, that was true.

F**k that! Sword and Shield, BroTP!

“Putting that together with what we learned in Kizuna’s world, it sounds like the effects of the fusing of worlds,” I pondered. There was a wave that had combined the Shield world with the Bow world, and then the Shield and Bow world had been fused with the Sword and Spear world to create the current one. It was only natural that a bias in the legends would arise.

"Worlds lived, worlds died. And nothing will ever be the same."

I've talked before that I'm a big fan of the concept of a Multiverse in fiction, especially in superhero comics. Right away I liked that the four Holy Heroes came from different parallel universes and then getting Glass and L'Arc showed that there were also parallel fantasy universes also fighting the waves. And now we get this theory from the characters that Raphtalia's universe is an amalgam, made up of other previous universes that fused through the waves. It's very Crisis on Infinite Earths and JLA/Avengers.

Reading Queen Melromarc describe the king of Faubrey and I'm just remember a scene that I and many Overlord fans love to the depths of our hearts, of Sebas the butler encountering a naked little fat man who got his sexual thrills off beating the women the brothel provided him. Sebas, like any true gentleman, kicked him in the dick so hard he exploded. Is there some to hope that a similar fate befell the king whom apparently married and killed (and probably even worse than that) 9,999 women? Not even Witch deserves that. Nobody deserves that.

Even though it'd probably take him to a dark place he shouldn't go, part of me was hoping for some karma to occur when Witch revealed herself as Takt's ally to Naofumi. He no longer had the shield, meaning he could attack her like he never could before, meaning he could kill her with his bare hands. I'm glad he used the defense rating attack on Takt, because there's been great long-time set-up for that, but yeah, I wanted Naofumi to at least get to break Witch's nose after everything he's been through. And if Witch wasn't irredemable before, she most certainly is now, proving she has no loyalty to anyone other than herself. She used Naofumi and the other heroes from the beginning for her own goals. Her mother had enough control that she couldn't just do whatever she wanted. And Melty was standing in the way of her getting the throne. She's still a terrible person but there were at least reasons for her to be against these people. But Trash? Her father, who has been loyal and on her side since the beginning, who doted and spoiled her from a young age because of how much he loved her? She had no hesitation in ordering him killed along with everyone else. There was no reason behind it. It was just pure cruelly, greed, and self-satisfaction.

And then...there's the Queen. ...F**k. Y'all bastards were really good at keeping that spoiler hidden. I was accidentally spoiled that Alta was going to die but not through this site. I had no idea the Queen was going to die. Of course Naofumi couldn't have the Shield during that part. If he made Mirellia into a shield like he did Ost and Alta he probably would be unstoppable, because she was just that f**king awesome.

We're pouring one out for you, your majesty. May your youngest daughter inherit your great wisdom and unbelievably hilarious slapping ability.

I'm really glad with Trash's development in this book. Like I've said in past posts, I can feel basic empathy for him given his backstory, but feeling sorry for him was not enough to actually put me on his side, because he was not putting in any work to actually be better or redeem himself. He was just acting angry and crazy and then just sad and withered. Here? While he had to be shaken and roused into it (can't blame him for that as he just lost the love of his life), he puts in the effort to make use of himself and holds himself accountable for his past actions. I really like that he wants to continue being called Trash. That is his penance. Not more feeling sorry for himself or blaming the rest of the world. It's time for him to be the man he knows he's supposed to be.

With all that though, Melty was definitely the person I felt the worst for after the death. Of all the younger characters, despite being royalty and mature for her age, she is the person who feels the most like a real kid, and her crying her eyes out while clinging to Naofumi hurt just like it should, because this little girl just lost her mom. No idea what the expectation is in Melromarc for when Melty should take the throne but for her it's always going to feel too soon, because how could it not?

“Daddy . . . thank you for approving my marriage. You’ve finally agreed to let me marry Ollie,” she said dreamily.

“I’ll make you forget this ‘Ollie’ soon enough, although his keeping you a virgin for so long is something to be thankful for!” Takt cackled. It was clear that he was using some kind of illusion to make her think he was her beloved. “Those who don’t give proper thought to their daughters’ happiness have no right to live!”

Oh good! He's a rapist too!

So Naofumi was the Shield's first choice and the other three were the Bow, Sword, and Spear's third choices. I like the credit that's given that the first choice is not guaranteed to be the best, as they can become just as corrupt or egotistical, or the third choices are not guaranteed to be the worst, as they can grow into real heroes. I'm just wondering how the selection process worked and why they all couldn't get their first choices. The Holy Weapons apparently have some sway over the universes they pulled them from, given the promise of granting wishes if they want to return to them. My immediate theory is that the weapons all set up paths that'd lead their choices to being summoned but just through sheer coincidence and randomness all the first choices, save for Naofumi, kept missing the path. Going down the list, the weapons become more desperate and thus are more willing to use more extremes to get their choices, thus why Ren, Motoyasu, and Itsuki had to be killed in order to be summoned. They missed their window with their first and second choices so now they absolutely have to guarantee they get their third, even if the methods are less than ethical.

With the big final boss, the World Eater as Naofumi called it, I'm theorizing that he/she/it is using the waves to fuse multiple universes into one so that he/she/it can eat it all in one go.

I only have two issues with this volume and they're both kind of nitpicks. The first is with Trash's plan, specifically with the Glawick ore. I don't remember it ever being established before in the series. I really liked the Rucolu fruit being used in the Cal Mira wave battle because it was set up way beforehand, so it feels like a lot less of a Deus ex Machina. Same with Naofumi using defense rating attacks after his battle with Glass. That's good set-up. The ore doesn't break the story, it just feels very convenient that such a thing happened to exist. If I'm mistaken and it was set-up before and I just forgot, please let me know.

The second is Naofumi and Raphtalia being separated again after a trip into another universe. The story next volume seems like it'll be very different from last time but that part does feel like a repeat of what we've already seen. Plus, with the new status quo of Naofumi knowing how she feels about him, I want to see their interactions now that he's recovered a bit from the loss of Alta. Again, it's a nitpick, since I'm certain they'll find each other again, but I don't like feeling like I'm being deliberately kept away from what I want to see.

“The source of your power, the one true hero, now orders you. Reconsider the state of all things once more and bring down a storm of flame upon my target! Drifa Firestorm!” Takt completed the spell.

...

“The source of your power, just a hero, now orders you. Reconsider the state of all things once more and scatter the storm that would burn its target! Anti Drifa Firestorm!” I read the magic Takt had incanted and activated magic to nullify it. With that, the fire tornado scattered into nothing, as though it had never existed.

Biiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiitch!

“I’m here to destroy everything you possess,” I menaced quietly. “Your pride, your dignity, everything you treasure. I’ve already half-destroyed your composure and your arrogance. Now it’s time for the other half. False hero, possessing six of the seven star weapons and the shield from the four holy weapons! Now face the reality of being defeated by a regular guy who holds none of the legendary weapons!”

No wonder Raphtalia couldn't be in this part. After hearing that line I don't think she'd be able to hold herself back and would have tackled him like a wild Albedo in heat right then and there.

I am so looking forward to when this volume's final battle is animated, especially the part where Naofumi gets his shield back. That is going to feel like such an epic, heroic moment.

So Rishia unlocked Pay-to-Win. ...I don't really know what to say to that. What do ancient magical relics care about money? ("What does God need with a starship?")

So the person Malty had Ren give a sword lesson to back in vol. 11, was that Takt, King Faubrey, or someone we don't know yet, like the mastermind behind everything?

Is Kizuna marked for death now? From how Fitora made it sound to Naofumi, when a Holy Hero dies a new one can't be summoned if the others are still around. If Kizuna's world works similarly, she might have to die or there'll be no Holy Heroes other than her.

Naofumi really likes his Dragon Ball Z, doesn't he? Which is appropriate given I just realized that the Energy Blast from the Spirit Tortoise Shield is almost literally the Kamehameha. Seriously, Kamehameha translates to "Turtle Destruction Wave".

So...what the heck do I do now? I've spent about a month reading through 16 volumes of Naofumi's rise and I know there are at least 6 other volumes that haven't been translated to english yet. I'll probably go find another LN series to read until vol. 17 comes out in July. Though I am curious if RoTSH has a fan translation site like Overlord and Konosuba do.

Original Reddit post: https://www.reddit.com/r/shieldbro/comments/fot3tj/read_through_light_novel_vol_16_random_thoughts/

[pass-the-bechdel]

The Good Place season one full review

How many episodes pass the Bechdel test?

100% (thirteen of thirteen).

What is the average percentage per episode of female characters with names and lines?

49.58%

How many episodes have a cast that is at least 40% female?

Twelve of the thirteen; seven of those are 50%+, and two of those are over 60%

How many episodes have a cast that is less than 20% female?

Zero.

How many female characters (with names and lines) are there?

Twenty-four. Eight who appeared in more than one episode, four who appeared in at least half the episodes, and three who appeared in every episode.

How many male characters (with names and lines) are there?

Twenty-two. Eleven who appeared in more than one episode, three who appeared in at least half the episodes, and two who appeared in every episode.

Positive Content Status:

Solid; the nature of the show is such that they really need to be making a concerted effort to reflect positive, progressive morality, and as such faults in the content would also almost certainly be considered faults in the show itself (average rating of 3).

General Season Quality:

Magnificent! It’s a wonderful ride, whether it’s your first time through or not. Just delightful.

MORE INFO (and potential spoilers) under the cut:

So, let’s talk about plot twists. In the current entertainment landscape, it seems like everyone is intent upon ‘subverting expectations’, and the good old-fashioned plot twist is very much swept up in that, since a subversion is almost always going to play as a ‘twist’ by definition. The unfortunate thing about this current landscape is that it’s rife with ‘subversive twists’ which are really just bad storytelling; they’re only there because of some pathological fear of predictability, or worse, because the creative minds just want to feel cleverer than their audiences by delivering content that no-one saw coming, serving their own egos at the expense of coherent narratives. If your ‘twist’ is about your own (supposed) intelligence, if you’re baiting the audience by playing into a common trope and then laughing at them for thinking you meant it, if you’re changing the story out of nowhere just for shock value without bothering to build toward the twist because you’re too afraid that someone might figure it out before the reveal...that’s not a real twist. It’s not even a real subversion, it’s just a bad-faith gimmick. It’s not there for the story at all, it’s there to make the writer feel special, because apparently feeling special for delivering quality storytelling isn’t good enough anymore. A proper, genuine plot twist should:

1. make sense in the context of the narrative (it should not be tonally dissonant or jump the tracks into a different genre)

2. make sense with the content of the narrative (it may recontextualise previous events or character choices, but it does not contradict or ignore them in order to function)

3. be foreshadowed (if it comes out of nowhere, that’s not a twist, it’s a random event. It’s a deus ex machina. There’s no story in it if it isn’t built into the fabric of the narrative)

4. ultimately further the storytelling (if it has no consequences for plot or character, it’s a shock-value gimmick, not a real twist).

The above points do not guarantee that a twist will be good storytelling and not just a subversive contrivance for the fuck of it, but they should at least ensure some logical cohesion and protect the integrity of the plot instead of sacrificing it in the name of empty surprise. That covered, it’s easy to see how – even (or perhaps, especially) in this twist-saturated tv landscape we currently inhabit – the big twist for season one of The Good Place still manages to be – in technical parlance – dope. The writing protects the twist not by being ‘too clever’; it simply offers a decoy issue to drive the plot. Eleanor is a Good Place fraud; that’s the first twist in the plot, and it compels the entire season forward. Other twists - Jason’s reveal, Eleanor’s confession, the introduction of the ‘real’ Eleanor - set the stage for this being A Show That Has Twists, but in a way that makes so much contextual sense that it doesn’t set us up to be looking for the next one (a common problem for those shows that rely on ‘cleverer than the audience’ twists - they’ve set themselves up as mysteries for the audience to unravel, and then they kill their own storytelling as they twist in knots trying to keep ahead of millions of intelligent viewers). The Good Place actually tells us outright that something is wrong with this supposed ‘happy afterlife’, it just fools us into thinking that we already know what’s wrong, so that we don’t see the signs of the truth for what they are. Crucially, however, it doesn’t matter if you figure it out before Eleanor does. You can have your suspicions (or have had the show spoiled for you in advance), and you can still appreciate and enjoy it as it unfolds, you can pick up the clues and have a good time with them, and that’s something that all of those gimmicky-subversion plots out there are missing. Their ‘twists’ are not proper functioning pieces of the narrative, and so the story doesn’t work if you already know the reveal; there’s no juicy build-up to enjoy, or worse, you expose your own illogical contrivances or outright plot holes that were created in the course of writing a crappy twist just to feel relevant. The Good Place works because - like any good story - it isn’t about the twist. It’s about the journey.

An important part of what makes the twist work also is that it interweaves the sins of Tahani and Chidi with the discissions of morality without drawing too much attention to them; if all four humans had simply been frauds, it would have been narratively empty, especially if the reveals were coming late in the piece. Jason’s works because it comes out early, and because the Jianyu cover is interesting and distinctly different both to Eleanor’s ploy and to the behaviour of the rest of the neighbourhood, but if the others had turned in the same way it would have been too contrived, too easy, and it would toss out the personalities we had gotten used to (which would violate Good Twist point #2). Since the show DOES pull that trick with Michael (which works because he’s the architect of the whole situation, not a pawn within it), it’s essential that they’re more subtle with Tahani and Chidi’s reasons for being where they are, and in playing it as they do they also reinforce the show’s central deliberations on morality. It’s an inspired framework for approaching what are traditionally considered ‘heady’ themes (and y’all know I’m into it), and every decision about how to approach and balance character behaviour is coming from a position of ethical consideration, weighing not only the acts themselves, but how they compare to the moral theory of various different and conflicting philosophies. It just goes to show that you don’t have to make something ponderous and inaccessible in order to have a cerebral conversation through television - you can do it just fine with afterlife comedy.

As I noted above the cut, the nature of the show automatically lends itself to careful consideration of any feminist and/or progressive content, and as such it should keep a pretty clean bill throughout, or risk cracking its own concept. I do wish they would come out stronger on the queer side of things (as I said in the episode posts, they really aren’t vague about the idea that Eleanor is attracted to women, but her saying words about hot women is still not delivering a lot on the representation front, especially when she is known to do more than say words when it comes to dudes, and the only other queer content we get is the fact that Gunnar and Antonio are soulmates, and that doesn’t technically mean they’re romantically or sexually involved (especially since they’re fakes anyway, but that’s a whole ‘nother thing)). In the mean time though, we have a female lead, 100% on the Bechdel and an essentially balanced number of male and female characters abounding, plus some really nice variety in racial backgrounds (and great names to go along with those - it’s a bit of a peeve of mine usually when show’s include multicultural characters but land everyone with Anglicised or ‘white-friendly’ names. Let the Bambadjans of the world keep their names). We’ve taken a clear stance on even ‘benign’ sexism (i.e. the stuff that’s just men saying inappropriate things - ‘just a suggestion! just a joke! just trying to get a reaction out of you, why are you so sensitive?’ - it’s all literal demon behaviour here), and I won’t pretend that I’m expecting them to get into the real nitty-gritty, but that’s ok. I’m happy to have something which is making a point of not being problematic, because such refuges have real value. So, maybe there won’t be a lot for me to tease apart as the show progresses, but that’s not a bad thing. At the moment, we have green lights across the board, and that’s a hard thing to find. I’m going with it, and we’ll see where we end up. 

[risingsouls]

@cxldtyrant​ said: 📂 [Vegeta]

Random and Useless Heacanons || Open!

[So this one is probably more on the useFUL side and one I’ve toyed with for a while, but I think I’ve made a decision. Gonna give some credit to this fic here because it’s where I was first introduced to the idea (I don’t know if they came up with it first but you know) and, even though it’s def a deus ex machina as Krillin points out in the story, it tracks with how advanced Cold tech is compared to Earth. And they were all about efficiency. Plus, this is Dragonball; it’s not out of place. 

BUT GO READ THIS IF YOU WANT A CHUCKLE. It’s a fun little fic with Vegeta and Krillin talking and eating sandwiches.

As we see in DB canon, there are in fact different languages across the different races of the universe as would be expected (even though everyone can understand each other for ease on the writers). Soldiers of the Cold Empire did plenty of travelling across the galaxy, coming into contact with all sorts of different races who spoke their own language. While there probably is some galactic standard language, it could never be guaranteed that the denizens of the planet could speak it. The language barriers could cause conflict in ruling and expanding a galactic empire. 

To combat this, Cold Empire scientists developed a chip that is inserted into the head and can fairly accurately translate any known language into the common galactic standard and back again. It was probably linked to the same system as the scouters which could do the same thing, but with the threat of them being destroyed, this was a better back up and often quicker for verbal communication.

I’m sure you figured out where this is going. With essentially all members of the Colds’ and, therefore, Frieza’s forces being outfitted with these devices, Vegeta (and by proxy Nappa and Bardock for this blog) has a translation chip in his head. Thus, he can pretty well understand and read most languages. There are definitely hiccups as it’s basically like having a Google translator in your head, and there are probably languages not known to the empire, so there are bound to be mistranslations still, but it does pretty well. It also doesn’t really help him speak it any better than he could without the chip (think tourist in another country with their little translation dictionary and trying to make sentences), so if he really wanted to be fluent in another language, he would have to properly learn it. Something he has tried out of boredom on longer trips but he never really had the patience for and deemed it beneath him (I don’t know why but I see Raditz being the communicator/good with languages out of the three, and I’m sure Vegeta and Nappa called it useless even tho it was VERY useful for them xD).]

[dzamie]

What is your opinion on the third movie htyd?

It was visually fantastic. The plot was bad, and the characters were less than stellar. Still a strong movie, but definitely the weakest of the three. Here’s a read-more because I T ‘ S   R A N T   T I M E   B A Y B E E

The light fury was fantastic. She looked beautiful, was sufficiently wild and catlike again (my main complaint against the 2nd and 3rd movies is that Toothless acts way more like a dog in them), and I love her cloaking ability. Shoving Hiccup off of Toothless only for Toothless to dive towards him, was mirrored beautifully with shoving Toothless to safety, then diving towards Hiccup to save him, too.

Toothless was... back and forth. I suspect I would’ve liked the mating dance scene had I not seen it in the trailers so many times already - as it was, it was hard to watch. I liked him pining for his ability to fly when Light took off and expected him to follow, and his exchange with her when she shoved Hiccup off was hilarious. I’m never a big fan of “infatuated at first sight” plotlines, though, so he definitely had the weaker part of the romantic subplot. And the lightning thingy was really cool, but I wish they’d used it between him discovering it an using it against the controlled dragons - not only would it follow the “rule of 3,” but it also would’ve made it seem less like “it’s not a deus ex machina if we show it once before” and more like something he could’ve practiced or played with, especially when flirting. Also, not really digging how Toothless is suddenly ruler over all the Hidden World. He took down one Bewilderbeast. ONE!! And it’s not like Light is clearly, undisputably Queen Of Hidden World by being a light fury, because there are other light fury families in the background! It seemed like a decision made to give him a reason to stay in THW instead of just... having a nest with Light somewhere away from Berk (for her comfort) but within a reasonable flight (for his).

Hiccup was dumb. I can only imagine that this took place about five years after HTTYD2 or even more, because that is an awful lot of trust to put on the line for some whackadoodle plan that has no guarantee of fruition. In the first movie, some Vikings were a little on the edge about finding the Nest, despite knowing that it must exist, and that finding it would be objectively better than not doing so. In 3, Hiccup somehow gets them to all agree on something that is incredibly unlikely to exist, they have no idea where it is, and it’s unknowable if their lives would improve or worsen from finding it. Also? After that big, climactic battle where Berk only wins because both Vikings AND dragons were working together? “Oh well I guess we don’t need each other, and we’re probably better off separate.” NO YOU DUMBFUCK GO GRAB YOUR BIG SCALY DOG AND SET UP A TIMESHARE

The other riders were actually really good. I loved Tuff’s “come, cry into my long, manly beard” stuff, and Ruff annoying the hell out of Villain Guy. Valka, too; she continued to move far more in sync with Cloudjumper than the other riders did with their dragons, which is great because they’ve presumably been flying together, isolated from Vikings, for over two decades. Actually, just typing that makes me even madder about the “uwu we can’t live together anymore” ending. Those two spent TWENTY YEARS happily together, there is NO WAY either of them would just be “oh okay, bye then.” Nope, even if everything else happened like that, Valka would either become That One Dragon Lady or Cloudjumper would just... “Valka. I hope you’re ready for a couple more decades among only dragons.” Like... “oh, Chief Hiccup said dragons are going away” “aye well the last chief said dragons were evil killers and to slaughter them on sight and look what Hiccup did. Looks like disobeying stupid orders runs in the family.”

Villain Guy. Whatever his name is. I’m calling him VG because I don’t respect him. He looks smart not because he IS smart, but because he’s never in the same room as people who can walk and think at the same time, except for when he’s threatening Hiccup. His motivation is roughly the same as Drago’s, but instead of combat ability and a goddamn Bewilderbeast, he has an endless potion of Plot Contrivance. Ah, yes, we know that Berk will go west because Sherlock Holmes But Unlikable has declared that furies don’t like the cold, despite Toothless loving to play in the snow and having the time of his life - it can’t possibly be that the map has your army one way, islands on a straight shot west, and literally nowhere else to go. How devious of you, to have put off killing Ruff and that other dragon for long enough to get the basic idea of following an unwitting pawn to your destination (a destination that YOU KNOW THE LOCATION OF ALREADY). Like yeah dude I get it you think you’re the Joker or Moriarity or something and you’re in it for The Thrill Of The Hunt, but, like, you don’t arm your men with anti-dragon weaponry at all when it comes to finally swing that trap shut. What happens if, somehow, your masterfully masterminded master plan of mastery fails to capture the Alpha, because who knows maybe alpha furies are magically immune to Plot Venom? Well, I guess you just lose. Helluva linchpin if you ask me.

Seriously, I suspect the guy only retains control of that huge fleet because the three numbskulls whose men they actually are are so ridiculously incompetent that he simply went “hey let’s toss a coin, heads I get your army tails you give me your army” and they responded “yeah that seems right.”

“Furies mate for life” boy wouldn’t it SUCK if Light already had a partner before you caught her? Wouldn’t it be JUST MISERABLE for you if Light decided that actually, fuck Toothless, he’s too human? Wouldn’t it just RAIN ON YOUR PARADE if it turned out that mating for life is a behavior only exhibited in cruel, forced captivity and thus is not present in Light, a wild fury, or Toothless, a fury who, the very moment he expressed desire, got Hiccup to build him a working tail? Wouldn’t it be just MAGNIFICENT if Toothless was already mated to Hiccup and Astrid? anyway my point is that this guy’s presented as a mastermind and he’s about as much a mastermind as Monster Musume’s generic protagonist.

HTTYD3 was a beautiful move and I don’t regret a single second nor cent I spent on it. But boy, could it have been so much better.

[neverlearnedtoread]

Timekeeper

⭐⭐⭐: super fun concept, supes adorbs romance, and a protagonist so realistic i got secondhand anxiety when he made questionable choices

Oh?? 👌😉😏

LGBT+ rep - m/m romance i wasn’t expecting but quickly caught onto, with a love interest i instantly liked - difficult sweet spot to hit

disability rep - danny’s ptsd and anxiety symptoms stick around even when inconvenient, and is never exaggerated for shock factor

unwavering ride or die m/f friendship who challenged and supported each other in equal parts - we don’t see enough of these!!

the romance arc centered around the idea that loving someone with disregard to everything else is inherently harmful and inevitably dooms the relationship - and that honest communication is the key to avoiding such pitfalls!!! problematic love story whomst??

No.. ❌🤢🤮

danny wasn’t a protagonist i wanted to follow along with sometimes...he picked up things wayyy slower than i did, and it frustrated me

a little deus ex machina at the end with the sudden powers cropping up - but i assume this is something explored more in the sequel?

reads a little slow...im a fast reader, and there’s a thing i do when im not particularly gripped by the plot of a book - i skim pages, reading every other paragraph or so until something interesting happens

Summary: Danny is a prodigy clock mechanic in this steampunk Victorian London, and his job is way more important than it sounds - in this world, clock towers don’t just tell time - they control it. If something goes wrong with a clock tower, everyone in the surrounding area could end up glitching like a faulty video game, stuck repeating the same motion over and over - or worse. So things get a little dicey when suspicious clock-related problems start cropping up all over Greater London, especially around Danny...

Some spoilers under the cut!

Concept: 💭💭💭💭

‘Steampunk Victorian London + clocks and time-related shenanigans’ was all the reason I needed to pick up this book - I went into this completely blind besides the sparse description the book blurb gave me (something I don’t typically do, but the gut feeling was strong with this one). It’s a great premise - clock towers control time and therefore all the people around them, and you get to follow someone who’s responsible for maintaining/fixing time when it goes wrong? A fun fantasy romp is practically guaranteed!

Execution: 💥💥💥💥

This book really did surprise me - I was utterly charmed by the romance between Colton and Danny from the get-go, impressed by the care the author took in weaving the impact of Danny’s PTSD into the narrative, and I loved the detail that went into the different ways a clock tower could need fixing - and therefore the variety of glitches that could happen when they started acting up. I felt like the author had a lot of fun with the worldbuilding, and I liked seeing what they came up with. Ending was a bit eh, but I imagine that the sequels pick up the thread easily enough.

Personal Enjoyment: ❤❤❤

I pushed and pulled with Danny as the protagonist - he was a good character, but really frustrating at times, to the point I stopped reading too closely for chapters at a time as I braced for the fallout of his bad choices - which is part of why I liked Colton and Cassie so much. They tempered his impulsiveness the way I wish I could. Honestly, the 3-star rating isn’t necessarily because I didn’t enjoy the book - it was because I had to actively dissociate from the protagonist as he made decisions I was getting secondhand embarrassment from.

Fave Moment: One that sticks in my head is when Colton admits he would have fallen in love with Danny no matter what - something about a clock tower declaring ‘I would have loved you if you were purple’ makes my heart grow about three sizes, apparently.

Fave Character: Colton was a genuinely delightful love interest who stood on his own merit and narrative arc. I also loved that he felt completely inhuman the whole time! There’s a danger with ‘inhuman’ characters where at some point they become indistinguishable from people - Colton’s actions and desires always felt not-quite-human, even while being endearing and sweet.

[metalgearkong]

Captain Marvel - Review

3/25/19

Directed by Anna Boden (Marvel Studios/Disney)

Captain Marvel is the 21st feature film in the Marvel Cinematic Universe, and wields the series’ first entry lead by a female hero. YouTubers and bratty bloggers across the internet have given this film a scathing reputation, even before showing in theaters. Say what you want about Brie Larson, I see her as an eager actress who is beginning to break into the mainstream, and is equally excited as she is nervous about being under the spotlight, carrying so much responsibility, and already under so much scrutiny. Somehow I’m charmed and endeared by her imperfection, especially in the PR realm, even if I don’t think I’d click with her in person. Captain Marvel is what you might expect from this franchise: a special effects-heavy character study about an iconic hero, cleanly connecting her to the greater MCU. 

Our protagonist is living her life as a Kree warrior under the name Vers. She has been a part of a Kree attack squad for 6 years, primarily fighting against the Skrull across the galaxy, but can’t recall her life before this time period. Chasing a Skrull to Earth (which had a classification name of M-55 or something to that degree) Vers attracts the attention of the retconed-named SHIELD. I say retconed because at the beginning of Iron Man which took place in 2010, and Captain Marvel taking place in 1995, it doesn’t make sense why they didn’t have an acronym for SHIELD in 2010 but call it “SHIELD” way back in 1995. Vers meets a younger Phil Coulson and Nick Fury, as they begin to learn who she is and where she came from. Vers becomes friends with Fury fairly quickly and easily for an extra-terrestrial (in my opinion), or does Fury know she’s human, despite her supernatural abilities and origin? I thought her adapting so easily felt a little generic and lazy for the script, even if she is a human down to the DNA.

This is a “hero’s journey” origins story of the character leading the MCU heroes beyond Avengers: Endgame. That alone relieves a lot of the tension of the film, as we’re all but guaranteed she will come out alive and on top, but this is a minor complaint I have about a lot of the MCU films, and something that is an inherit problem in a shared universe format. However, as stated, this is not the cynical cash-grab many fragile egoed men would have you believe online. I am proud the MCU now has a leading female hero, and one who doesn’t predominantly define herself with sexualizaiton, or has a story centered around a relationship. She feels like she could have been male or female (for the most part), which is exactly how Elen Ripley was originally written for the Alien franchise. Her forgotten past certainly integrates struggles of a woman in a predominantly man’s world (the US Air Force) but this was the only aspect of her story what was fundamentally feminine. Either way, Vers realizes she’s a human, and used to be named Carol Danvers, and suffered an accident that gave her energy powers and amnesia.

What I wanted more clarification on are who the Kree truly are, and not just their job, but fundamentally what makes someone a Kree. Carol is obviously a human, but her squad clearly contains other humans and non humans. Were the Kree just a joint force where any race could join? If so, what would keep Carol from learning about Earth knowing she and other Kree were humans? What makes all Kree bleed blue if they’re from different races? Why was Earth treated as such a mystery, especially when the dominant race is identical to herself and certain squad mates? Its these sorts of details, and details mentioned before, that kept me from being immersed fully in this movie, and wish they were better hammered out in the script. I was glad the Skrull, or at least primary Skrulls seen in the movie, were people wearing make up and masks, and not yet another CGI creation. Ben Mendelsohn plays the Skrull leader Talos, and its yet another charming yet genuine role by one of my favorite Auzzie actors. Talos’ personal story is one of the better aspects of the film, and I wish he and his race got more attention than they did.

Ironically, the more powerful Carol gets, and the more of her powers she discovers, the less interesting the action got. I liked seeing her struggle with her emotions and learn to use her unique powers wisely at the beginning of the film. Once she unlocked her full potential later on, I may have liked the triumphant moment, but seeing a CGI girl shooting energy blasts and flying through space was less tense than the stunt and martial arts-centered fights earlier in the movie. The technology to de-age Samuel L. Jackson is excellent, as its easy to forget the man is in his 70′s. Phil Coulson’s effects don’t look quite as good unfortunately, but he has far less screen time. I loved Carol’s smaller "fish out of water" moments, and her somewhat sarcastic and upbeat personality, even if she did cross the line into being straight up rude in one or two scenes (her personality needs some consistency). Her nod to the late great Stan Lee also marked a small, but satisfying final cameo for the Marvel founder. I loved seeing Carol interrogate people making sure they weren’t a Skrull and her going too far on occasion I found charming and funny. 

I can’t say how relieved I was to discover this entry in the Marvel Cinematic Universe wasn’t the SJW propaganda the internet was making it out to be. Captain Marvel may not be a top tier Marvel movie, but it serves as a satisfying sci-fi/superhero origins story, leaving a lot of potential for the future. While Carol Danvers’ personality did teeter precariously between clever and overly cocky some of the time, I chalk it up to her finding who she is as a person both personally, and figuratively as the writers of the film. I have no doubt her sequels movies and presence in future cross-overs will round out her abilities, limitations, and personality exactly as we’ve seen with the legacy characters. I’m excited to see what lies for her onward, even if the film wasn’t as groundbreaking as they wanted it to be, and if the script was missing some important details as well. I’m also hoping deeply that Carol Danvers isn’t a human deus-ex-machina for defeating Thanos in Avengers: Endgame, and somehow the plan to reverse the “snap” and putting down the purple giant remains complex, nuanced, and meaningful.

6/10

[ganymedesclock]

Hi DOUBT Lotor is the 1 behind the Altean harvesting stuff.Bc its totally off characterization wise, hes a traumatized antihero. By HAGGAR whos characterization fits 100%, who also suspiciously powered up then did nothing? After ominously staring @ him *& Allura*? Then w perfect timing took him 2 her then left when a mere gun was pointed at her? & more.Shes his abuser&took his whole support system(again) 2 break him.Manipulating events&Romele &Lotor himself so he'll appear the villain -like d&d

All righty, I have four questions. In order:

1. Why would Lotor play along?

If Lotor’s genuinely innocent here, why would he flat-out say that he did exactly what Romelle accused him of, that Alteans did lose their lives because of his research on quintessence? If he’s innocent, if he’s never done anything to endanger the lives of the colony Alteans, why did he cover up Bandor’s death? The amount of times Haggar would’ve had to have dropped everything, traveled to the quantum abyss, and impersonated Lotor would be so high and so irregularly timed it’s impossible the real Lotor wouldn’t run into Haggar doing that.

Furthermore, even if he never caught Haggar, you really think someone like Lotor who’s observant to the point of near paranoia wouldn’t immediately panic as soon as the allegedly perfectly safe colony Alteans ask him or mention anything about the second colony that he supposedly took people to?

Why would Lotor obviously behave guiltily if he has clean hands here? Why would there be so much evidence, on the colony and in his response, that he’s full of regret but never, for a second, is remotely confused by Romelle’s presence and accusation, if he’s innocent? I love Lotor and I’m rooting for him and I do see him as an antihero but you have to acknowledge that Lotor is acting pretty damn culpable.

After all, if Lotor was totally innocent with regards to the Altean colony you’d expect the first thing he’d do once he was sure he could trust Allura was show her his good work.

2. If this is true, then why does Lotor have the results of Haggar’s quintessence operation?

S4e5 really clearly shows Sincline’s fuel tank and the bright blue energy it contains. We know the energy that leaves the colony that Ranveig intercepted was cyan- we see that in Krolia’s recollection at the beginning of s6e2. If Lotor wasn’t involved in the colony there is no good answer where he got that energy and no evidence of somewhere else that would’ve been a source.

3. What part of this exactly doesn’t align with Lotor as a character?

Here’s the thing about Lotor. Lotor has been established from s3e1 onward that, in ideology, he’s much more altruistic than the empire. His values are much like the heroes’- he considers the empire’s parasitic and racist system to be utterly unacceptable.

However, unlike the heroes, we’ve also consistently seen that Lotor is willing to cross his own moral lines to get to what he sees as good solutions. Whether that’s executing Narti on the spot because he believes she’s a traitor, whether that’s setting Throk up to be tortured by the empire, whether that’s attacking the Puigian rebels who he acknowledges are just trying to survive and protect themselves.

This is why I call Lotor an “antihero” a lot- because that’s literally the niche he occupies. A hero- because his objectives and values align with the heroes- but ethically willing to cross lines that the heroes aren’t to pursue those heroic objectives. 

He’ll try to do it efficiently, he’ll try to minimize the pain for the most part, but he’ll still do it. 

That’s exactly what the colony is. The pain is Lotor harvesting the Alteans, which makes sense as a choice because again, Lotor has no other source of energy. Zarkon destroyed the one empire-approved colony Lotor had and was getting quintessence from and Lotor admitted himself he wasn’t taking as much as he could from said colony- and as an exile, Lotor doesn’t have the access of the empire’s quintessence network which is right in the palm of Haggar’s hand.

But we notice that Lotor takes small numbers of Alteans that add up over time, but there’s the memorial to the fallen, but Lotor convinces everyone there’s nothing to be scared about, there’s no bad thing that happens to them. It’s more than just euphemistic.

This is not remotely the first time Lotor’s done something he knows is wrong because he feels like he has to, because he felt like he was in a corner without other options.

4. Pardon my french, but how in hell could Haggar guarantee that Romelle would be found specifically by allies of Voltron who will take her to Lotor specifically before Lotor secures power with the rift?

Even if we assume Haggar can directly influence the paladins’ actions through Shiro- which we don’t see evidence of- Keith split off from the team on this mission in s4e1 and had precious little contact with them. There is literally no way Haggar could assert control over Krolia and Keith unless Krolia is a traitor and that’s completely incongruous with literally everything we know about Krolia and her framing situation, it just doesn’t work.

(Also it’s deus ex machina levels of stupidly convenient for Haggar if she inexplicably conveniently has Keith’s mother as her spy especially when out of the empire there is literally nothing to suggest Krolia’s connected to Earth or to Voltron)

Especially since Krolia and Keith had to take the slow route through the Quantum Abyss and how close Lotor came there is literally no way Haggar could have rigged that situation. There are a ludicrous number of variables entirely outside of her control that would all have to fall in exactly the right way at the right time as I discussed in my Romelle is not a liar post.

[cyclopticblast]

X-Men: Blue this Popsicle Stand (Pt. 3)

“...stars in the bright sky looked down where he lay. The little lord Jesus asleep on the hay.”

Hardly an intimidating song, but Scott had spent this latest segment of his journey as tense as any. And that was fully including the nearly 250 miles he’d spent held by the armpits, dangling in midair on the Nova Express. The constant Christmas Carols were just entirely too much stimulus when he was already on edge. It would be too rude to put in his headphones, still, it was hard to even think straight with all the singing. Considering the church bus had been good enough to let him ride along on the way to Richmond from D.C., he couldn’t very well complain. Not without being a real jerk.

Still, part of him wished he’d asked Nova to take him further. Considering the trouble his friend was probably already going to get his way? Scott thought he’d asked quite enough of Nova. Besides, the further he went, the longer it was going to take Magneto to get to him. Still, this wasn’t a great situation. It was loud, he’d already been privy to a fairly unpleasant conversation about Mutants, he’d already once deflected a comment on how he looked familiar. “Just one of those faces.” On top of all of it his phone was dying. Before long he wouldn’t even be able to make the occasional safety check-ins he’d been making, so Magneto really needed to get here sooner rather than later.

On top of that, Scott truthfully didn’t know how for how much longer this ‘disguise’ was going to hold up. Not that it was much of a disguise to begin with. Sweatpants pulled on over his uniform shorts and a pair of clip on sunglasses over his own ruby quartz pair. Yes siree, just one of those faces. This wasn’t going to hold up long, he knew it wasn’t doing much to hide a recognizable face. Of course, that he could tell with these sunglasses on overtop of his own. The world had dulled to a dark murky red.

For how dark it was, the world outside the window of the bus may as well have not even existed. That made the prospect of trying to find a new ride even harder. It’d taken far too long walking South down the interstate to catch this ride to begin with. It was cold, and dark, and exhausted after getting back late from the mission last night. All of that made the music, and the foul talk, and the comments on how familiar he looked easier to bear. But maybe he’d find something new once he got in town.

It couldn’t be long now. He couldn’t have to buy that much more time now, surely? For the past while he’d been beginning to see lights, signs of approaching civilization, from outside the windows of the bus. Probably he could change courses here, but he didn’t actually have a plan past this. He’d headed south because the coastline was populated. But he’d expected to be picked up before this. Maybe he’d contact Magneto, to see if he was still on the way? It was definitely a better use of his remaining battery power than all the energy he’d drained listening to music, trying to calm his nerves on the subway. That was something he was considering.

Then came the bang, somewhere back behind him. The back of the bus fishtailed wildly, right, then left as the driver overcorrected. The Christmas carols stopped, replaced by cries of alarms and hasty prayers. Scott just braced his hands against the seat in front of him, just breathing steadily. It only took a moment for the bus to be back under control, but that moment felt like a near eternity. And then the bus slowly rolled to a stop in the right hand lane. What he wouldn’t have given to catch his breath and wait for a repair, but staying in place wasn’t really a choice so long as he was on the run. Waiting wasn’t an option.

And then, waiting was even less an option. There was a rapping at the front door of the bus, though he couldn’t see from what. He didn’t need to see, his ears worked perfectly well. He knew well that familiar growl, low but still more than able to carry. “Summers, get your ass off this bus. Right now. Don’t make a mess of this.”

Ass off the bus. Right. There were two ways to do this. Go along with it, face up to his actions, and possibly pay the price for them. He didn’t see any sign of the other X-Men. No one to speak words of reason but himself. Option two…

He quickly got to his feet, dashing instead towards the back of the old school bus, forcing open the emergency exit and dropping down to his feet. He felt the shock of the drop in the tops of his feet, radiating up his ankles, his shins, his knees. It didn’t stop him for even half a second. He didn’t have time. Instead taking off in a sprint through the wide open parking lot beside the road. He needed cover, he needed...honestly, Scott wasn’t sure what he needed. Truly, the answer was distance.

He was better with space between he and an enemy, but Logan was fast, damn fast. In a sprinting race, it was no competition. Scott didn’t hear footsteps on the concrete behind him, so maybe he was okay. Maybe not. All he could really hear was his own heavy breathing and his heartbeat thundering in his ears.

That illusion was quickly shattered, likely along with his glasses. That last bit would be incredibly difficult to confirm, seeing as they’d been knocked clean off his face by the force of 300 lbs of angry adamantium-boned Canadian colliding into him. Maybe they were just off? In the moment, it didn’t really matter. Surprised, he couldn’t control the initial blast, though he quickly squeezed his eyes shut and braced his hands to scrape against the concrete. They were  definitely bleeding, but far from the most urgent thing on his mind. That was more the fact that he could barely breathe, the heavy weight of the headmaster falling after him knocking the breath clean out of him.  

“Stay down kid.” Well, nice to know that Headmaster Logan had made it out of this seemingly scot free. For the moment, all he could do was groan and writhe, struggling to breathe, body not cooperating. “Got half a mind to put you down as it is Summers, but you make a move, you’re gonna force my hand.” Getting clever with the wordplay or just a demonstration of a face, Scott didn’t know, but the point of a claw at the back of his neck made the point abundantly clear. It most definitely stopped his scrabbling around for his glasses. “Now what’s gonna happen here bub? You get your breath back, you’re gonna start talking, we’ll see how cooperative you’re feeling and we’ll see which half of my mind is talking then. Are we clear?”

Scott’s response was just another groan, though this time more to do with the situation he found himself in. The weight on his back, wasn’t doing him any good getting his breath back at all. He didn’t know what options he had. Talking? He didn’t think talking really would do him any good. Possibly, but he was still in an incredibly vulnerable position with no guarantee of a return on investment. Fighting wasn’t an option. There was no way he could move before Logan did to pull something off. If he blasted down, he knew his head would move back into the claw. No options.

No options but deus ex machina, god from the machine. Scott’d never heard the plane land, but then Magneto had never had any need for things as having the solid ground under his feet before. Why start now. He could only think of one other time when he’d really been happy to hear his voice booming out, carrying on the cool winter wind, but he was in equally as desperate a situation this time around. “Is that what is going to happen here?” There was a tone of wry amusement audible in Magneto’s voice. “I think not.” The weight on his back lifted, and Scott was finally able to whirl around onto his back, though, opening his eyes was still a gamble, even just looking up at the skies. “You thought that I would call my X-Men to serve in my name, and not protect them when the time came? Perhaps with information, you would bring down your legions on me? I think not.”

There were more words spoken, but they were lost in the cacophony, and he wondered if the pair could even hear themselves. All he could do was scramble blindly through the lot, feeling for his glasses, but by the crunching, crashing screams and squeals of metal and glass and splintering wood, Scott was fairly sure that he didn’t want to see it anyways.

The sound rose to a crescendo, and then finally it was mostly quiet, just as he found his sunglasses once more. Slipping them on his face, it was a fairly potent reminder of exactly the situation he was in and exactly who he’d allied himself with. Twisted metal all about, the Headmaster nowhere to be seen, but presumably in the compacted mass of several cars laying several yards away. And then Magneto beckoned for him to follow. He’d come at a point when Scott had no options, and ever after the fact, that hadn’t changed.

Scott followed.

[elizas-writing]

Spoilers Galore: Avengers Infinity War

So I was going to delay this post for a while to allow enough time for most everyone to see it, but I also got swamped with midterms hence why it took so long to get to this.

Nevertheless, the spoilers are worth talking about given how much happens in this movie, and I really wanted to get this out before Deadpool 2 premiered, so Happy Birthday to me (seriously, I’m now 22) for putting my procrastination to an end.

If you haven’t seen my spoiler-free review, you can check it out here to get my general opinion of the film.

So that’s a hell of a body count, huh? I knew from the get-go of this story line that characters were going to die, but holy freaking shit! A lot of people, myself included, figured that at least one of the older heroes would be the first to go, so it was quite the shock when most of the side characters and newer heroes were offed after coming off the heels of their successful solo films.

And I know despite what the Russos and Marvel executives are saying, it is glaringly obvious that not everyone could be permanently dead since sequels are still in the talks and Guardians of the Galaxy Vol 3 just got a confirmed release date (c’mon Marvel, you’re not that slick). On top of which, the Infinity Gauntlet is more or less a giant deus ex machina which can put everything right in a heartbeat. Regardless, these are still heartbreaking scenes to sit through with everyone being brought to their lowest points and losing their loved ones. Some deaths are little rushed, but the music, cinematography and performances sell on the tragedy, and the emotional weight carries throughout the rest of the film. I never recovered after Gamora’s death; that was just too much after she and Peter finally verbalized their love. Even characters like Scarlet Witch, Vision, and Doctor Strange, who I didn’t care too much for, really sell in their drama to show the high stakes, both to the universe and their psyches as they make the ultimate sacrifices to try to save everyone.

It seemed really weird at first that most of the new characters were killed off, but I figured that most of the older stars like Chris Evans and Robert Downey Jr are probably getting one last hurrah in Avengers 4 before their contracts are up and make way for the next phase/generation of heroes for MCU. And I imagine when these guys have to bid the franchise goodbye, it’s going to wrench our hearts out even more.

As I said in my spoiler-free review, the most fun interactions are with the Guardians of the Galaxy. I like seeing Rocket and Groot help Thor to create Stormbreaker while the rest of the gang runs into Tony Stark, Doctor Strange and Peter Parker, and Gamora... well... see two paragraphs before. I think her coming back is going to be more tricky since she didn’t disintegrate like most of the rest of the characters, but part of me is really hoping we’ll get something because she’s a great Guardian and one half of the only stable power couple in the entire MCU. But still, it’s fun to see the Guardians, who were mostly off doing their own thing, finally get involved with a much grander battle. And hey, we finally got Rocket asking Bucky for his arm, and it made me giggle like an idiot.

I know a lot of fans will give me backlash for this, but Loki is one of the few characters who I hope stays dead. Yes, him pulling a knife against Thanos of all people makes no sense, but you can see the panic in his face as he’s pulling every trick he can to distract Thanos as long as he can. It’s a well-deserved redemption after years of not knowing what he wants and the extremes he went to, and after all this time, he still can’t bear to see Thor perish and makes the ultimate sacrifice to ensure his survival. It’s a genuinely heartbreaking moment which leaves Thor visibly shaking. It’d feel like cheating now to cop out his death again after the strong reaction Thor had.

I love seeing Tony Stark being heroic again with impressive updates to the Iron Man suit with continuous 3D printing for repairs. Doctor Strange, although I’m still annoyed they never gave him a complete character arc in the first place, has a lot of fun banter with Tony with some visually wonderful sorcery and fighting. Peter Parker, as usual, is fun and naive and still wanting to prove himself, and he’s best when he gets to be a team player in these ensemble films to form strategy. But what Tom Holland does best as Peter is reminding us of his young age and emotional vulnerability, which is why his death is the most gut-wrenching as he’s clinging to Tony for dear life and pleading to not go.

The rest of the characters are more hit-and-miss in their development, especially as most of them haven’t been seen since Civil War. And they try to bring up the Sokovia Accords again, but that gets cast aside quickly to get the Mind Stone out of Vision. Steve Rogers and T’Challa shine as leaders as the battle comes to Wakanda, and I can watch that scene where all the warriors chant “yibambe” over and over again. It’s relieving to see Rhodey and Bucky back in action after the physical and mental turmoil they went through, and Sam still has plenty of fun one-liners. Black Widow, Okoye and Scarlet Witch make a fun girl power team. And when Thor, Rocket and Groot come in, words just escape me in how intensely fun that battle gets.

I think the weakest part of this section is probably the romance between Scarlet Witch and Vision. It is one of the few parts where not much is explained what happened to them in between movies and how Vision was able to deceive Tony for so long. They were kinda just thrown into the mix in Age of Ultron, and I don’t think they ever figured out what to do with them aside from finding a way to work in an Infinity Stone. But once again, what pulls them through is the performances by Elizabeth Olsen and Paul Bettany to bring the weight of the unavoidable situation these two are in where only Scarlet Witch can kill Vision via destroying the Mind Stone.

Part of what makes the heavy-handed tone work is how inconsequential everything feels. Even for all the gritty and depressing moments, MCU always finds a way to end it on a hopeful or even funny note to keep spirits up. This time, they’re not fucking around. Think about it-- every film from Doctor Strange to Black Panther in the grand scheme leading up to Infinity War doesn’t matter anymore. Stephen learning to be humble, the Guardians learning to trust each other and move past trauma, Peter Parker learning responsibility, Thor becoming a great hero without his hammer, and T’Challa opening up Wakanda to the world? Yup, none of it fucking mattered cause most of them were either killed by Thanos or disintegrated anyway. And the worst part is that they were playing by the book and most of their plans worked out, but Thanos still found a way to one-up them anyway and win.

A lot of people mentioned this already, but what makes Thanos fascinating as a villain is that the film almost frames him as the hero to his own self-deluded ideas. He has a backstory, a goal, an arc, the whole nine yards. He doesn’t hesitate to kill whoever to get the next stone, he’s incredibly manipulative towards his own children (which is best depicted in how he “adopted” Gamora), and he’s so far gone beyond reason to believe genocide is what is right to fix and over-populated universe. Even more wild is the fact he doesn’t want the glory or credit, and he’s perfectly content to retire on some remote planet to watch the sun rise-- as seen at the end of the film. However, I do question why the Soul Stone regarded him killing Gamora as an act of love when it was always, always manipulation, but hopefully we’ll get to see that explained in the next film cause, c’mon folks, that ain’t love.

There’s also some things left unclear like what exactly happened on Xandar, and why Bruce can no longer bring out the Hulk, but we still got a couple more movies to look forward to in the year until Avengers 4. And I guarantee the Russo brothers had a shit ton more scenes they wanted to add in but couldn’t due to time constraints, and if they were to release an extended cut, I would not mind at all.

Like I said before, this film had so much going against it, but paid off tremendously well with a consistent dramatic tone, bringing together characters for the first time and reuniting others, and always keeping the audience guessing on what to expect next. And it succeeded in emotionally screwing us over with an always brilliant cast who know how to wrench our hearts out.

One of the best of the MCU without a doubt.

If you liked this and enjoy what I do, buy me a Ko-fi to say “Job well done!”

[misscrawfords]

Well, I saw The Last Jedi...

HERE BE SPOILERS

(Also - I will be tagging all posts with “spoilers” and “tlj spoilers” for you to avoid. However, from now on this blog is NOT SPOILER FREE and I can’t guarantee that something might not slip past by accident. Proceed at your own risk.

Okay, I’ve just got back and my head is whirling so don’t expect complex analysis.

However, I’ve been chatting with the lovely ladies in the spoiler zone of the Reylo discord chat and that’s helping me clarify my thoughts a lot.

So basic reactions first in no particular order:

- I am now in love with Poe Dameron. I now ship Damerey. I don’t know how this happened. 

- There’s a bit in the soundtrack that is basically the finale of Sibelius’ 2nd Symphony. No1 curr I know but I’m intrigued.

- There was way too much going on in this film. It was like a later HP book - some great things happening individually but overall I just want to kick it because there was too much and it was easy to lose sight of the heart of it and its message because there was YET ANOTHER BATTLE and yet another subplot and character development for a minor character. I’m really frustrated.

- Since when was Hux such an awesome character!? I loved how he was played for laughs but honestly this is absolutely Draco-in-leather-pants. Kylux is literally a Cassandra Clare fanfiction. What is life.

- Several deus ex machina moments that made me go “hmm”. Floaty sky princess? Um, okay. That was unnecessary and a bit weird. Felt like a cringey tribute to Carrie Fisher and then she was knocked out for most of the film. I have problems with that entire narrative arc. To be explored later. Also Force ghost Yoda. Really? 

- WTF was that child doing at the end? I’m so confused. My instant reaction is to be suspicious and annoyed. If that child grows up to have the Force and takes away from Rey then I will be so annoyed. Also, we don’t need more characters. We really, really don’t!

- I was disappointed in Rose and Finn. I just... I just didn’t care. Because, once again, there was too much going on. Their whole storyline felt tacked on. Like, there were elements I really liked. I loved the whole weapons dealing in space concept - it was blatant but really good. We were basically in space Saudi Arabia and I loved that and I loved the code breaker who betrayed them for money. It was a more interesting and morally grey update of the bounty hunter concept and I really loved it. Also it fitted very well with the overarching theme of both sides being flawed and the profit of war and it all being kind of pointless in a way. BUT there was too much of it and I feel like they could have shown that message and done Canto Bight somehow without so much subplot that really distracted from the main heart of the film. I’ll need to think about this further and how I would have preferred it to go. Also at the end, I was really annoyed at Rose for saving Finn. Like, I 100% did NOT want Finn to sacrifice himself - NO SIR - but Rose stopped him potentially saving the whole Resistance by taking out that gun. Like, strategically it was dumb since Finn had committed to doing that. (I’m sorry, I’m such a cool-headed Slytherin, but it’s true!) I don’t know where to go from here for these two characters and I didn’t really buy the romance. Perhaps I would have done if there HADN’T BEEN SO MUCH DAMN STUFF GOING ON.

- It was really funny. Like, I was not expecting the humour. Especially over the First Order. But seriously, the FO run by played-for-laughs Hux and emotionally unstable Kylo is not exactly going to be a slick administration, right? It’s a recipe for disaster! (Sorry, Hermione Granger brain taking over again.)

- SHIRTLESS KYLO FANSERVICE. what even

- Every single “inappropriate use of the Force” fic is now canon.

- I kind of need to do a separate post about my Reylo thoughts and feelings, but suffice to say I am actually very conflicted, as I am about most of the film. Everything that happened made total sense in terms of character development and as a continuation of TFA and I applaud that and yet I feel uneasy. I also felt a lack of romantic/sexual chemistry between them that the film could have built up with music and other techniques, even despite shirtless Kylo and the HANDTOUCHING SCENE OMG WHAT IS LIFE. I’m not saying that there isn’t a basis for something to develop in IX but I was left feeling... I don’t actually know. THERE WAS TOO MUCH GOING ON AROUND THEM. I need to watch it again. I may pick up on things on a second viewing I didn’t see this time.

- SAVE BEN SOLO. Honestly, I have no idea what is going on. The film is massively pushing a redemption arc in its plot and what everyone around Kylo is saying. And every time he has the opportunity to fall in with this, HE DOES THE EXACT OPPOSITE. He’s not the only one being torn apart tbh. I don’t understand what the film wants me to think about this. (This isn’t about me analysing it, it’s about an initial reaction to feeling that I don’t know what the film is doing. It seems to be saying “Redeem Ben Solo! It can happen! That’s where this is going!” at the same time as “Kylo Ren is a monster and is turning into the Big Bad of this trilogy” which I don’t really believe but also I just do not see how he can come back from where he is.) But oh my goodness, his was the performance to watch. And he is still the centre and heart of the trilogy, as he should be as the new Skywalker.

- Speaking of Skywalkers... I loved Luke. He was so incredibly “Luke” and yet different. Is it what I’d expected? From what I’d heard and the marketing, yes. From his character as I previously understood it, I’ll have to watch the OT again. I think it probably works. It’s interesting. And Mark Hamill was absolutely fantastic. I really loved the flashbacks and the explanation of the destruction of the school and how it was a horrible, horrible misunderstanding. Best way out. Really tragic. And I like how the adults are taking responsibility for what happened to Ben. But also, like, the choices he makes now are his own. And they are terrible, terrible choices??? Not just morally terrible but also just, like, terrible. Poorly thought out...

- And yet, to me, the most true thing anyone said at any point was Ben’s speech to Rey when he asked her to join him about needing the whole old order to be swept away and replaced. It just... it really does? I felt such a feeling of relief. Like, the legacy is so strong in these characters. They need to get away from their past and the mistakes of the past and the burdens of the past. And that’s shown with the Resistance story but also with the Jedi story. Kylo’s way of doing this is all wrong, of course, but his ideas and vision is right and true. And I feel like this needs to happen! I don’t know HOW Ben can be pulled back from all the awful decisions he is continually making and the fact that he is squandering every single chance he gets, but I just feel like the only ending that is truly satisfying is Rey and Kylo starting from scratch again with a clean slate.

- Which is why Rey Nobody is so important. Whether Kylo is telling the truth or not about her parentage, she’s not a Skywalker. Or a Solo. Or anyone from the OT. And that is so necessary and important.

-  I have no idea whether to talk about Kylo Ren or Ben Solo.

- Before watching it I kind of wanted Rey and Kylo to leave together on nobody’s side but their own but watching I realised that she would never leave with Kylo. She will only leave with Ben. But he is refusing to be that person so I don’t know if it can happen. But it also has to happen. Because if Kylo dies in an act of redemption (which is what I always thought would be his fate after TFA) then Rey is left alone again and there is no balance. Sure she has her Resistance friends whom she loves and who love her and that is GREAT, I’m not knocking it, but they don’t understand her. They build up the Force bond, they build up the fact that neither is alone because they have each other, they see their future with each other (and even if that is a manipulation of Snoke’s, he is showing them what they want to see so it is still true) - and then Kylo dies and Rey is all alone as the Last Jedi after being alone all her life. And like, yes, found family and all but... it’s just. Why set all of that up? I’m just incredibly conflicted.

- I’m going to spend the next two years trying to understand all of this by writing Poe/Rey/Ben love triangle fic. Because I loved that moment of chemistry between Rey and Poe and I think he is kind of like the hero she wants but she’s got this connection to Ben and she’s got to deal with that but I think a transitional period in which she awakens to romantic/sexual feelings via Poe would be very important to her. Because I think one of the issues I have with seeing Reylo in this movie is that Rey is just so forceful and determined on one thing that she is not thinking in terms of romance or anything like that at all. There’s just nothing coming off her in that sense - until she sees Poe. And I’m conflicted between what the symbolism is in the film and what the characters actually do. Symbolically and mythologically Reylo is the only answer. But the acting and the characters of them as psychologically realised individuals is problematic to me. I don’t know if any of that makes sense, it’s 1.33am now.

- So on the topic of Rey will only go with Ben and not with Kylo, Ben has to save himself. Rey MUSTN’T, for the sake of feminist narratives everywhere, this cannot become a “bad boy saved by the love of a good woman” story, and I don’t think it is because Kylo is rejected every attempt Rey is making to change him. When he does do something “good”, it is of his own volition. The throne room and killing Snoke, for instance, (also, I totally called that as something that could happen, not that I did it here so I can’t prove it - ah well!), he didn’t do because of Rey directly. So he has to work that out for himself but I have no idea how he is going to do it. I mean, sure Rey can be part of this process and even the catalyst, but she can’t do it for it.

- I’m still so confused by the ending. Were Rey and Kylo looking at each other? I’ve seen people say he was kneeling in front of her, but I’m confused because I thought he was in the main part of the base and they were in the Falcon somewhere in the salt mountains? And also I thought Leia was still on the ground and I was convinced she was going to stay behind and see Kylo but then she was on the Falcon and were Kylo and Rey just staring at each other? I’m confused. I think this may have been a meaningful moment but I was just trying to work out where they all were and what was going on.

SO over all. Overall, I enjoyed lots of it but I don’t think it was a great movie. There was simply too much of it and ultimately I think there was a really fascinating and subtle story surrounding Luke, Kylo/Ben, Leia and Rey with juicy goodies like Force Bonds and grey morality and growing up and growing old (for all that Yoda’s appearance made me roll my eyes, I loved the line about the roll of the master being to be outgrown or whatever it was because as a teacher it’s just, yeah... it meant a lot). But this great and interesting and new take on the SW universe was being lost in battle after battle and confusing Resistance politics and overlong subplots that went nowhere (Finn and Rose didn’t even succeed?! What was the POINT) and an attempt to shoehorn in this fascinating story into a generic SW movie about the plucky band of Resistance fighters and the big bad Empire that we’ve seen too many times before.

LET. THE. PAST. DIE. I’m over that plot and I’m just annoyed because it has the makings of a great movie but I’m just left feeling too much was going on and I’m confused about the bits I really wanted to focus on and linger over.

Anyway, going to see it again on Wednesday with school and I am going to really, really focus on Reylo and trying to find the possibilities for romance so that if nothing else I have fodder for fanfic!