#or someone who wants terribly to lead and protect but is so unsure of himself because of how much he understands the gravity of that role

[kaurwreck]

fav chuuya trivia: he’s a lightweight and a wine collector. combine it with the fact that poisons a weakness for him, ability wise, and too much alcohol is in fact poison. he chooses that often.

bonus: combine that with the fact that dazai’s coming of age came with going to a bar, and i don’t know what that means

anon cause shy

Untitled I. My dear, even though you treat me kindly, I'm stubborn. After we parted last night, I went drinking and berated some weakling. This morning, Waking up, I remember your kindness And sadly reflect on my vile behavior. And now, I, a total fraud, will here confess that, without shame, Stripped of all dignity, and therefore lacking honesty— I was urged on by my own illusions, raving mad. [...] III. In this world we sadly live in like this, your heart— Don't let it grow stubborn my dear Because I hope for intimacy with you Your heart— don't let it grow stubborn my dear.

[Excerpted from Poems of the Goat, written by Chuuya Nakahara, translated by Ry Beville]

[constantzeigarnik]

Do you have any headcanons on how Emmet would react to Ingo and Volos relationship?

I'd imagine if Emmet sent himself to the past to find his brother he'd probably disapprove of Volo, Volo is pretty suspicious on his own but if he found out he's the reason his brother is there he'd most likely wouldn't understand how Ingo not only forgave him but is also in a relationship with him.

Even before Emmet found out he most likely already felt something was off about Volo

This got long again

Anytime Ingo starts to flirt around with ANYONE, Emmet is on guard. They're both attractive and get plenty of attention from men and women alike. Emmet isn't terribly interested in that sort of thing, but Ingo has been known to, very very rarely, flirt back when someone comes onto him (in his own strange way.) If someone is particularly persistent he might go out for coffee with them, but things never really progress past that, and Ingo has wound up terribly dissapointed and a tad bit hurt multiple times because of it.

The last thing Emmet wants is for Ingo to start to catch feelings for someone only to have his heart broken, so he becomes VERY protective whenever Ingo starts dating.

Assuming that Volo cracked and admitted he was involved in the mess that lead to Ingo being pulled into Hisui, it probably would have taken Ingo quite some time to forgive Volo. He doesn't remember what he lost, what his life was like before Hisui, and Volo swears on everything that he knows and loves that he didn't mean to cause Ingo's situation. It was a long series of, at this point very unfortunate, incidents and bad choices that lead them to where they are today. Volo, banned from Jubilife, on very shaky grounds with the two clans, entirely unsure what his future holds and whether or not Ingo will still be in it.

Volo gives Ingo his space, he'd wait as long as he had to for his love, even if Ingo never forgave him. Ingo gladly takes the time to think on what he has learned. He's actually the one who talks the clans down from just straight up exiling Volo completely, and it's while he's making these negotiations that he realizes just how painfully much he misses Volo, and that in this strange, unfamiliar world he had been such a bright light. He'd give just about anything to have him by his side again, to just go back to the way things were before.

Once vague peace has been made with the Diamond and Pearl clans on Volo's behalf, Ingo sets out to find him. They cross paths in the Highlands of course, and Ingo sits Volo down and they talk. It's a long conversation on a longer path of healing, but for all his mistakes, Volo admits that the biggest one was not recognizing how much of a blessing Arceus had bestowed upon him by bringing Ingo into his life.

They part ways that night with warm feelings and hope for the future. There is still work to be done, but they each rest easy knowing that they will see the other again soon.

Years pass by from the incident and people move past it. Ingo and Volo settle in, and despite their time apart for their jobs, it's almost domestic. Ingo is happier than he's ever been there in Hisui, and Volo can imagine spending the rest of his life with Ingo.

Then Emmet shows up.

I think if Emmet showed up to Hisui and found that Ingo was in a relationship with Volo, it would happen well past the dating stage of their relationship. They would have been together for a while at that point. He might not even find out about it from the two of them.

Emmet: I am Emmet! I am looking for my brother! Do you know where Ingo is?

Irida: Well, Volo's in town, so I imagine Ingo's likely staying in his tent tonight. They've been glued to each other every chance they get ever since they got together...

Emmet: What?

When Ingo and Emmet finally see each other, the flood of memories the appearance of his brother causes completely overwhelms Ingo. The twins spend the first hour or so reunited just half clung to one another, all but babbling about a lot of things that don't really make sense to anyone but them. All they're aware of is that this is Emmet, he says he is Ingo's brother, and he seems to have come from the same place that Ingo had.

Volo keeps his distance, just watching with a few members of the Pearl clan. He's simultaneously overjoyed for Ingo and the fact that he can finally remember who he was and where he came from, and absolutely terrified for what this might mean.

Volo feels like hiding, but before he can, Ingo and Emmet have calmed down a little, and Ingo is bringing Emmet over to him, seeming eager to introduce them to one another. He can see the warmth still in Ingo's eyes, and his heart beats a little faster. Ingo still loves him, Volo can see it, feel it.

So can Emmet. To him it's obvious just by the way Ingo is acting, the way he is looking at this stranger, Ingo's so head over heels for this man. His alarm bells are immediately blaring, but he does his very best to keep a friendly smile as Ingo introduces him to this man, Volo, his long term partner.

Volo is friendly enough, seems well composed, and clearly he’s been with Ingo for quite some time at this point if what he hears is true. There’s just something about him that feels off though, and with how messed up this whole situation has been for so long now, Emmet doesn’t feel like he can trust Volo as far as he can throw him.

But it’s hard to deny the way they look at each other...

After that Volo keeps a respectable distance while the two catch up, while Ingo does his very best to explain what exactly happened and how he ended up there in the first place to Emmet, and if he knows what Volo did caused his time traveling incident, then he would undoubtedly share that with him. Emmet is of course pissed off beyond all belief to find out that Volo was the cause of all this, whether he intended to pull Ingo into the past or not, and the fact that Ingo is with Volo absolutely baffles him. 

Ingo tells him of how the two met, how much Volo helped him and was a friendly face in the beginning when it was the hardest for him to adjust. How they had become friends slowly, and that Volo had brought happiness into his life when he had been lost and confused and, though he wouldn’t admit it to pretty much anyone other than Emmet, honestly quite scared. Volo had helped him find his place there in Hisui, and make a home there. 

Emmet listens to everything Ingo has to say, and it leaves him feeling terribly... conflicted. He’s never heard Ingo talk that way about anyone. 

.

Later that evening Volo is approached by Emmet, and he’s immediately put on edge by the smiling man. He looks so much like Ingo, but there’s this palpable mood about him that puts Volo into fight-or-flight mode, but neither of those are valid options right then, so he just stays put as Emmet takes a seat beside him, away from the other villagers and prying ears. He has no idea what to expect, so he says nothing and gives Emmet a moment to figure out what he wants to say to him.

Finally, after what feels like an eternity to Volo, Emmet speaks up.

“I am Emmet. I know Ingo better than he knows himself in some ways. He’s very happy here.” Emmet says, his voice quiet, and he keeps his eyes lock ahead on the view as the sun sets ahead. 

“...I would hope so, we’ve tried our best to make him as comfortable here as we can. The people of the Pearl Clan are kind, they’ve treated him well, I promise.” Volo starts slowly, hesitant, but it’s clear Emmet didn’t come here just to make small talk. “I feel a ‘but’ coming from you though.” He adds, and Emmet nods.

“Ingo doesn’t belong here.” Emmet said with a small shrug. “I came here to try and bring him home, to our time.”

That much had been obvious to Volo, but damn if it didn’t still hurt to actually hear it from Emmet’s mouth. He wanted to take Ingo away, back to a time that was likely so far away from where they were now. He couldn’t begin to imagine how long he would have to wait to potentially see Ingo again, because the idea of waiting even a short time seemed painful.

“But...” Emmet continued, pulling Volo from the painful thoughts slowly beginning to overwhelm him. “He is verrry happy here.... with you....I don’t understand, but I see that much.” He admitted, a low, bitter tone in his voice as he spoke. That fact didn’t make Emmet happy, he hated it, but he couldn’t deny it was true. 

That brought a small smile to Volo’s face, and it hurt to hear. 

“You’re right though, Emmet. He doesn’t belong here. Neither do you.” Volo says with a shaky sigh, despising the very words coming from his own lips. “I love him, and it’s my own damn selfishness that’s gotten him stuck here in Hisui in the first place. I can’t tell you how desperately I want to continue being selfish, to tell you that he’s here now, that he should stay with me and what we’ve built together. But I love him, and I can’t do that to him...”

“...It’s not up to either of us, in the end. The important thing is that now Ingo has his memories, and a choice on which life he wants to live.” Emmet says.

“...Right.”

Volo knew which way that choice would go.

[animeyanderelover]

💕Can I request all the senjus,orochimaru,shisui and itachi with a s/o who managed to make themselves immortal with out consequences and they did it without experimenting but they can make other people immortal but people keep trying to kidnap them for it,also they don’t age anymore?💕

This is what pretty much Orochimaru’s dream is.

Tw: Yandere themes, unhealthy mindset, unhealthy relationship, possessiveness, obsessiveness, delusions, kidnapping, manipulation, clinginess

Immortal s/o

Hashirama Senju

🌳He is quite the more supporting and encouraging person. But in this situation even he finds himself a bit unsure how to feel. Your jutsu is quite amazing and something marvelous, but Hashirama is someone who wants to spend his whole life with his darling and die later on when both of them are grey and old together, that is his dream. But with you who stopped aging long ago and will never die, this is something impossible. The clan has definitely a huge interest in you, even though they are aware that your ability will end up being terrifying if it goes into the wrong hands which is why the Leaf guards you very observingly, not wanting to risk that a rival village gets their hands on you. If their strongest shinobi would be made immortal, that would end in a catastrophe. Hashirama himself makes sure that even in his own village no one plans on abusing your powers.

🌳I do not think that Hashirama would force you to either make him immortal nor to somehow tell you that you should try to stop your powers and start aging again. Not like he won't try to convince you to eventually consider finding a way to stop being immortal and instead settle down and live with him. Given the fact that are immortal, you might lived longer than he did and for that have knowledge he and his clan do not possess which is why you're treated from the Senju and the whole village really respectfully, if they need advice they will go and ask you. Hashirama can also only do this much and so he grows more clingy since he knows that he will die whilst you will live. And so he wants to be able to have a place in your heart for all the time to come and alongside with his brother and future generations, he trusts you to protect the Leaf Village once he dies. Even if his darling is immortal, he still wants to marry them since he is traditional.

Tobirama Senju

🌊Despite him being the harsher and much more intimidating and blackmailing guy from all the Senju, he has a rather simple dream as well. He wants to marry his darling and live with them together and one day die. And his dream is messed up with all of this as well and he is quite irritated by the knowledge that you made yourself immortal. On the one hand Tobirama is eager to invent new jutsu himself so from that perspective this is beyond fascinating, a wish many people before him had and tried to work on. But in a way this is honestly way too mocking for him as well because even if his darling might have to endure harsher lessons with him, they might honestly have the relieving thought that he will die one day anyways and then they're free. It is angering because it is true and depending on how old they are, they might nag him because of his behavior and he won't be able to say much against it since he knows they have more experience than him in life.

🌊This might be an advantage you have against him next to the whole being immortal thing. He will start being more respectful once he finds out how old you really are. He literally can not help it and that is why he sometimes, under the risk of his pride, asks you for some advice. He doesn't really want to be immortal either, even though he is more curious about it than his brother is. But what he has to do is always guaranteeing that you are under high protection because he know what terrible things your powers can do when being wrongly used. He might actually try to create a jutsu similar to yours because in a way you have been inspiring him. He also will end up marrying his darling. For starters he is a pretty traditional guy so marriage has a high meaning for him as well. Additionally he is not willing to let you that easily get away with your long life, he is possessive. He just kind of wants to set a mark on you for as long as you're part of the Leaf.

Orochimaru

🐍You have literally achieved what he has been trying to complete his whole life time without even having to experiment on anything and it is thrilling for him. No wonder he is after you as soon as he has heard the rumors, being in his way fervent about it and his obsession starts before he has even met you in person. And oh, he will hunt his darling down, no matter where he has to go and who he has to kill. He wants that jutsu and that talent who created it and no one will stop him. Not going to lie, at the beginning he is a bit salty, mostly because he feels like he has been beaten since you didn't even have to use anyone, you just had pure skill. But whilst he might have lost this, he still can owe the person who had the skills and intelligence and since he will totally force you to teach him that power and make him immortal as well, you might be stuck with him forever if you do so. And the bad part here is that if you don't, he will have no problems torturing you or using you as his next vessel.

🐍You're immortal, so it's not like you will die and he takes advantage of that if you refuse to lend him a hand. If you do help him, he will show his gratitude in a rather odd way, but it's better than his sadstic side. He simply keeps you, that much has to be said already. He can't effort to lose a talent like you, the experience not even to mention. His darling becomes his very special treasure who helped him earning immortality and in return he offers them a place to stay and protection. He knows that everyone wants to have that sort of abilities and he gets rid of all of them all to gladly, he won't let anyone dare to take his special underling away from him. He just always has you tagging along with him. Sasuke gets kind of interested as well since you are indeed powerful and you might as well get close to him since he is together with Kabuto and Orochimaru the only person you will see for a long time. Depending on how long you are already alive, Orochimaru also wants to know pretty much all jutsu and other knowledge you might have.

Tsunade Senju

🐌She looks quite young for her age which comes from the fact that she uses a jutsu that makes her appear young, but she is just like everyone else. She ages and is bound to die one day. And Tsunade handles this maybe a bit worse than some others do. You gotta understand, she just thought that she finally found the one person she can manage to live together with the rest of her life only to discover that they will continue living forever. And to know that she might be only one of many to come and that she might be forgotten one day is truly not very pretty, it makes her a bit more desperate. At first she was probably scared that you used to do the same things Orochimaru did to reach your goal so she was definitely more at ease when hearing that you succeeded without having to go with such drastic methods. For that reason she refuses to let her old teammate find out about you, knowing that he will be after you if he hears that you're in the Leaf which would only give him more reasons to attack.

🐌Tsuna might find herself tempted by the thought to be made immortal from you and live for all eternity together with you, simply because she is possessive as well and wants to be finally happy with the person she loves after all her beloved people dying on her. She's not completely sure, she knows that being immortal can be as much of a curse as it can be a blessing. The the council from Konoha is quite possessive as well, knowing how valuable you are and so they might want to use your powers for more selfish reasons from time to time. This leads to arguments between Tsunade and them because she is often against such decisions, seeing that they plan on making use of you. But one thing they do agree on is keeping you save from all other forces who want you in their grip. Funnily you might be a part of the eldest yourself if you lived long enough which gives Tsunade an advantage since you are on her side and not that narrow-viewed like the other eldest are.

Shisui Uchiha

🍂At this point in his timeline his darling might as well be already part of the village or at the very least known everywhere in the hidden villages for their special jutsu which is why everyone is on some sort of hunt for them. Shisui himself honestly probably never really saw himself falling for someone who constantly dominates the spotlight like you do, maybe also because he thought, despite the fact that you look young, the age difference would make him view you more as a admirable sensei because being able to make yourself and others immortal without having to do experiments on humans needs skill and wisdom. Shisui also just knows that even if you like him as well, this is a completely impossible love since not only might the superiors forbid it, but he does not desire to be made immortal. He already knows that everyone dies sooner or later and given his job being ready to die is a must since he is constantly exposed to danger.

🍂It would only break your heart in the end which is why he kind of feels like it might be best if he stays silent about his feelings at first. He just focuses on protecting you from potential enemies who plan on kidnapping you and tries to be someone who can leighten your mood up a bit since he sympathizes that life for you must be quite tricky. If he does confesses to you because he feels like you really like him as well or you tell him you like him first, he might hesitate and voice his doubts, but can be more easily manipulated since he loves you. Shisui kind of knows that he might not be the last since he doesn't want to be made immortal and you might find after his death a new person you love. And he accepts that, he doesn't want his darling to be alone only because they can't die. But he can make sure that he leaves some sort of impression on you so you will remember him. He wants at the very least a special place in your heart.

Itachi Uchiha

🍡He did not kidnap his darling so he could have their jutsu for himself, he definitely didn't. He did it because he lost control over his emotions and given the fact that you are constantly being chased by other power-hungry persons, he got triggered too much because he knows that some will hurt you to get what they want since you can not die. And afterwards Itachi just has to be really careful so that no one will find out because you are no ordinary person. You are famous and a living legend for your achievement and it'll cause a huge motion if he is being sighted with you because everyone will know afterwards, including the Akatsuki and he can expect that Pain will definitely want you to be a part of his organization since you not only have a very gifted ability, but might also possess knowledge and forgotten jutsu from long time ago. And Itachi doesn't want to force you to live the same life as him, even if you can't be killed on such missions.

🍡Itachi knows that he doesn't have long to live anyways and he already accepted that fact, he has his plans in mind for this. So he knows he won't be there for too long to protect you from all the greedy and selfish people which is why he might plan on making Sasuke look after you once he dies and he tells you about this as well, even though he knows you can handle yourself very well on your own as well. He respects people who are older than him and for that reason he might be far more respectful to the s/o than he would be already and he isn't embarrassed about it. Similar to Shisui he also knows that after his death his darling might find someone else and he won't be angry with them for it. They shouldn't spend their whole life grieving over him since he wants them to be happy. The only person he might ever tell willingly about his darling is Kisame since he is next to his younger brother the only person he really trusts with his darling.

[embrassemoi]

Surrounded by the Moon and Stars ✷ 29

Pairings: Sirius B, F!Reader, Remus L Warnings: Language, angst, insecurities, blood, darkish thoughts (self-hatred), fighting, violence Author's Note: heavy chap. if you’re having a bad day, take a moment, be kind to yourself and put off reading this until you feel better 💜

【 Masterlist | Previous Chapter | Playlist 】

Chapter 29: That Pet You Just Couldn't Keep

━━━━━━━━━༻☽༺━━━━━━━━━

Remus woke up to a bright, white light. He squinted, head lolling to the side of his lumpy pillow. The chair near his bedside was empty, saved from a pitcher of water along with a few potions Madam Pomfrey must’ve left for him, were placed on the stand beside his bed.

Something wasn’t right. Peter or one of the other Marauders were always there waiting for him after his transformations.

Too hot for a blanket in June, he ripped off his covers and noticed the bumpy, large material hiding beneath his nightgown. He licked his lips, letting air whistle down his dry throat while a sharp, burning sensation flooded his abdomen. Remus winched, groaning out while stretching to drink the potions and water. Although, as he brought the glass vials to his lips, he noticed that his arm was littered with scratches and bruises. Curious, he lifted the slit of the gown to see a large wrapping across his lower stomach and bruises in the shape of lopsided circles and rectangles travelling across his body.

Remus felt his face scrunch. Ever since the Marauders had become animaguses, he hardly sustained any injuries aside from the occasional limp or flimsy scratch. There was usually an absence of pain nowadays, not an overload of it.

What caught his attention was the scent of human blood. His senses were always heightened the week leading up to the full moon and the week following, so it was particularly strong. It caused his head to spin like planets performing a celestial dance.

Preoccupied with the scent, Remus didn’t notice someone slipping into the room.

“Hey, how are you feeling?” A fuzzy Peter came into view. He went to sit on the edge of his bed sporting a nervous look.

“Was wondering where you were.” Remus relaxed at his appearance.

“Yeah… Erm — been busy.”

Soon enough, another sharp pain stabbed at his abdomen again. “Fuck — what happened last night?”

Wormtail sucked in sharply as he wiggled in his seat uncomfortably. “I… something terrible happened. Bollocks, Moons — I’m sorry...”

Remus felt his spine prickle with needles. “What?”

“We should wait until Dumbledore or James comes back.”

“Dumbledore?!”

Ghostly pale, Peter was on the verge of fainting. Remus took another deep inhale. This time, he smelt blood, but it was coming off of Peter and a few other foreign scents lingered on him. Was that… Y/N? And… Snape? Remus scanned Peter, noticing the droplet of red on his shoes.

“Pete,” his voice dropped to an icy whisper, “Whose blood is that?”

He remained quiet.

Remus moved to prop himself up on the bed. “What happened?”

As Peter spoke, every word made Remus recline into himself and he was left unsure of how to feel. The overload of information put him into a state of complete shock. His vision faded in and out, suddenly feeling very cold and dizzy compared to the hot weather.

He distantly heard Peter trying to gain his attention but stared blankly at the metal bed frame.

“Say something,” his friend tried, sounding desperate. He didn’t even know how long he’d been quiet for.

Remus worked through the betrayal in nine steps. It helped make sense of his emotions. To categorize them — making it easier to file away.

1. Shock & denial

“No,” he said, barely moving a muscle in his face. “That's impossible! Padfoot would never…”

Peter watched him pitifully. Remus’ eyes blinked rapidly, heart pounding. “I’m sorry.”

2. Process what happened (or try to)

“He… told… Snape?” He asked despite Peter repeating the story multiple times.

“Sirius was mad at Sniv — Snape, and he was provoked by —”

“I didn’t hurt him, did I? I didn’t hurt anyone?”

“He’s fine.”

“Then why won’t you tell me what happened to me? Why was I bleeding?”

He refused to look him in the eyes and Remus felt terror ebb it's way through his skin. “Answer me!”

“As I said, L/N and Snape got into a row… she heard Sirius tell him and she went to save him…”

“Don’t you dare lie to me.”

Wormtail took a deep breath. “You… nicked her a bit and James’ antler broke off in you because… he was trying to get you off of her…”

Remus was rooted in place. What Peter just said was unreal. His stomach twisted painfully. He blinked. “Y/N’s hurt? I hurt her?”

“Yes — no! That was Snape —” “Is she here? Did I bite her?”

“You didn’t and yeah but —” “Move out of my way.” He pushed himself up wobbly.

“You lot a lot of blood, sit —”

“Get out of my way!” He threatened. Remus pushed Peter to the side, clambered to his feet. Remus gripped the bed tightly and felt a few seams rip open and blood began to faintly seep through his white bandages.

He staggered around, ripping back the curtains until he saw Y/N. Limping up to her bed, Remus almost burst into tears when he saw her. She looked so tiny, curled up and engulfed in blankets and pillows. Her ankle was propped up, head bandage and skin dull.

It felt like Peter had poured a bucket of freezing cold water on him.

He hurt her. Almost got her and Snape killed or infected. Could have hurt Prongs and Wormtail…

He was a fucking monster.

He should be put down.

From how loud he was, running around the wing, Y/N’s eyes fluttered open. She attempted to stretch, groaning out in pain. But then, her eyes flickered up to him and she froze. Her hand shot up protectively to her chest and face as instinctively went for her wand but stopped. Genuine fear flashed through her, making Remus instantly want to cry. It felt like an eternity passed as she gripped her sheets and opened her mouth.

She was going to scream — to take him away — call him a monster — to cry or yell for Madam Pomfrey or —

But Y/N’s body relaxed. A tried smile twisted and gaze dissipated with fear, replaced with nothing but understanding and softness; she even went as far to touch his hand but Remus wrenched it back.

“Ta-da!” She croaked. “I lived.”

Remus didn’t smile, only staring horrified.

“Yeah, that was a hit or miss...” Peter interjected. He stood behind him, ensuring that if he fell, he’d be there to catch Remus. He continued to stare like she grew another set of eyes.

“What?” Her grin deflated. “Am I that irresistible?”

That pulled a breathy laugh from Remus as he shook his head. Why wasn’t she disgusted with him?

“Thank Merlin, you’re both awake.” All their heads turned to James’s floating head before he pulled off the invisibility cloak.

James moved to pull Remus into a large hug, whispering an ‘I’m sorry’ into his ear. He held him for a while before breaking off, going to embrace Y/N who wheezed.

“Ouch.”

“My bad, my bad!” He pulled back and slipped into bed with her. Peter forced Remus to sit on the edge of her bed while he stood.

A million thoughts ran through his head. He wanted to get away, to run — not even be in the same room as her. Remus wanted to think, to make any sense of what happened.

What the fuck happened? He couldn’t even process it.

She remembered everything, right? Surely she wouldn’t be this calm had she.

“Oh, wait — Lupin, are you alright? I swear a deer came at you last night.”

James chuckled out loud, breaking Remus out of his thoughts as he looked at him and Peter. “I guess there’s no point for secrets anymore.”

Y/N looked at them questioningly, her eyes squinting from the bright light before Peter went to close the blinds shut. James got off the bed, smiling widely at Remus and Peter got onto the bed instead.

“Ugh — Pete? James? What —”

A loud gasp ripped from her mouth as she jerked away from James who turned into a very large stag and Peter into a fat brown rat.

Remus could almost cry at how comical her face looked.

James was so large that he had to take a few steps back to prevent his antlers from poking one of their eyes out and Remus noticed that one was gone.

He felt sick again. A hand drifted to his stomach.

“Holy shit! Oh my god!” Y/N went to graze a finger on Peter’s fur before turning to James with shaky hands to touch one of his antlers and patting him on the head. She was speechless as her mouth open several times before forcing out, “You're really Bambi!”

James turned back, taking his glasses off to clean. “I wanted to be a lion — for Gryffindor, y’know.”

“You can’t choose, I wouldn’t be a rat.” Peter grimaced.

“They’re highly intelligent. Nothing to worry about.” James reassured and ruffled his hair.

“When did you guys learn to do this?”

“We’ve been at it for three years now. We finally were able to do it in August before school started.”

She shook her head, staring in awe.

━━━━━━━━━༻☽༺━━━━━━━━━

Dumbledore came to speak to everyone later that day.

Remus had been dreading it once he came into the wing and began speaking to Y/N, a buzzing sound filling his ear. All Remus was left to do was twiddle his thumbs, waiting and completely disoriented.

When he finally approached him, Dumbledore lost his usual twinkle in his eyes. He made sure to close the long vertical blinds and again, the room filled with a low buzzing sound.

“How are you doing?” He asked. Remus, had he been in the right mindset, would have prevented the scoff escaping him. Dumbledore didn’t react but continued. “Miss L/N is recovering well and Mr. Snape didn’t receive any injuries. Just a fright.”

Remus nodded, that was good, but he remained quiet.

“Snape’s been persuaded to act accordingly for the best interest of his fellow pupils and L/N gave her word.”

Remus choked back a laugh. Snape was going to, no matter what, let his secret slip somehow.

“You’re also exempt from the Transfiguration exams, both you and Miss L/N. You’ve both sustained a degree of varying head injuries and you’ll be graded on a cumulative from McGonagall.”

Dumbledore was forcing Remus to the edge as he bit down on his inner cheek. It was useless to listen to him. “Are you expelling me?”

“No. You should not bear any blame.”

“Dumbledore, no offence, but are you mental?” Remus sputtered adding, “I endangered four students last night.”

“Yes but —” “The next time we won’t be so lucky. I’m a monster, sir. I should be.”

The headmaster sighed. “Remus, give yourself a bit of credit. Think highly of yourself.”

Remus gave a dry laugh, almost baffled at how Dumbledore was acting. Did he just gloss over the fact he could have gotten students infected? He wouldn’t be able to live with himself had he. “How can I?”

“Well Y/N seemed to think very highly of you. She made you a very compelling case along with your friends, Potter, Pettigrew and Black.”

“Black’s not my friend,” Remus countered. He didn’t care about how rude he was being.

“Remus —”

“Is he expelled?”

“No.” The answer had Remus wheeling, anger spiking. “He’s not.”

“Why not? If it isn’t my fault, that I’m not to blame then why isn’t he? He told them how to find me.”

“I understand that this is a very difficult situation and rest assured, Sirius will be punished. I can promise you. But expulsion isn’t the answer.”

Remus refused to look at Dumbledore and he must've realized he was getting nowhere with him. He stood but before leaving, he gave a pitiful look.

“I have done terrible deeds, indulged in foolish pranks that I have lived to regret, but each has been a valuable learning experience. It’s a pity that it came to this. Learn in your heart to forgive, Remus. The world is already filled with too much hate.”

━━━━━━━━━༻☽༺━━━━━━━━━

June 16th, 1976

3. Sadness & pain

Remus had been avoiding the Marauder’s dorm. He’d gone as far as begging Madam Pomfrey (who’d taken pity because she knew what happened) to let him stay another two nights before getting kicked out. Remus always healed physically faster and his wounds were already healed by the third day. Pathetically, he’d been sleeping in dingy passageways or the prefects’ bathroom before relocating after being harassed by the ghosts.

Remus had a plan, avoid them; skip classes, get longer prefect duties, never staying in one spot for too long. He wouldn’t know what would happen if Snape saw him. Although, whatever Dumbledore told him, it kept Snape quite so far. But tonight, he got tired of Moaning Myrtle sobbing.

Before curfew, Remus made it a habit of visiting Y/N, who was still stuck in the wing; both out of guilt and because she was his friend, but he couldn't stay for long — seeing her like that made him wallow in guilt.

Similar to him, Lily had visited, along with the other girls, every day. Today, Lily stayed a little longer, bleeding into the time Remus usually dropped by. He watched as Lily whisper into her ear, causing Y/N to laugh and Lily blush madly as she sat snug by her side. Not wanting to ruin their moment, Remus went to leave before they had the chance to see him.

Remus had another pressing matter anyway.

He entered one of the nearest bathrooms to give himself some sort of pep talk and stared at the mirror.

You can do this. A voice echoed in his head.

Typically, memories from the full moon came back to Remus a few days or even weeks later, his brain usually too foggy a couple of hours after and even then, he would never fully remember everything. He vaguely remembered seeing a flash of Snape’s face and Prongs but Y/N’s screams were one of the clearer memories from that night.

“REMUS! PLEASE REMUS! STOP!”

Remus looked to stare at himself in the mirror. He observed the scar on the bridge of his nose, feeling bile rush up his throat at the sight.

He was a freak, littered with scars covering himself.

He was disgusting.

Ugly.

Pathetic.

Dangerous.

A monster!

4. Anger

Sirius Black had always been loyal, so what changed that night?

He needed to leave. It was no good staying here anymore.

Remus was shaking with rage, twinged with hurt. He paced outside of the common room door and had a few options running through him. Either start a huge fight with Sirius or just… ignore it.

Avoidance.

Maybe he could ignore Sirius forever? Impossible, surely. Sirius would get bored, anxious within a couple of weeks — that was too generous — a few days sounded right.

With his mind made up, Remus crept up to his room. He could hear the faint shouts of James and pondered about just sleeping in the common room or prefects’ bathroom. Even if he did have to listen to Moaning Myrtle.

Maybe because his senses were still coming down from its peak or James was just brash, but Remus didn’t even have to press his ear on the door.

“— done ENOUGH! — hear me? You better — why are YOU crying? You bloody — understand? Understand?! You will not talk — him — best friends my —”

The only person he's told he was coming back was Wormtail and it sounded like he told Prongs.

Remus didn’t care to listen anymore as he pushed open the door. Pete was sitting on his bed, eyes wide at Remus’ presence surrounded by unwrapped wrappers. He always tended to eat while stressed.

Sirius was looking down at the floor as James stood in front of him, scolding him like a child. But, his head shot up once he walked through the door. Out of his peripheral vision, he could see his eyes bloodshot, puffy and circles dark. He didn’t dare look at him.

Remus didn’t acknowledge them, instead moving robotically to the bathroom, changing into his holey yet comfortable clothes before scurrying off to bed, swinging his curtains shut before casting a silencing spell around.

He’d plan to adhere to his avoidance strategy. It worked so far.

━━━━━━━━━༻☽༺━━━━━━━━━

June 18th, 1976 | 1:29 am

“Psst… Moony.”

Remus turned over to face him. “What do you want Peter?”

“Just wanted to check up. You okay?”

“What do you think? Please, leave me alone.” And then closed his bed drapes.

━━━━━━━━━༻☽༺━━━━━━━━━

June 19th, 1976 | 11:37 pm

Peter had crept up to his bed again as Remus laid there awake, thoughts swarming him.

“I’m not in the mood. I’m tired.” He moved to turn over and forced his eyes closed.

Peter had been nothing but amazing. Always thinking about him and his needs but what Remus wanted most was to be alone and Peter's pity and worried features did nothing but make Remus feel like shit.

━━━━━━━━━༻☽༺━━━━━━━━━

June 21st, 1976

In life, there are few things that are certain. Getting older, death, taxes… No matter how hard we try, no matter how good our morals are or our intentions, we all will eventually make mistakes. It’s either as small as burning your food or writing the wrong answer down on a test, but you’re also going to fuck up pretty bad and hurt people. Say something — do something you don’t mean and it’ll end up with both sides hurt. If you want forgiveness, there’s multiple solutions to gain that back, but the two words — obvious, there, waving in front of your face — can be the hardest words to say.

“I’m sorry.” Black muttered for the hundredth time that night. His voice was pushing Remus to the edge as he kept his face straight. Dead. Not once taking Sirius’ shitty apology baits. He continued to stare down at his book, reading silently in his dorm. His teeth hurt from how hard he was clenching his jaw.

Remus was right, of course, he was fucking right. Black had grown anxious as he ignored him.

“I’m sorry.”

Remus never really considered himself violent. Sure, he’s gotten into rows that ended with a punch or hex here or there, but Remus didn’t have violent thoughts. If anything, he prided himself on not being a bonehead like Black and Prongs. But, it took every ounce not to beat the shit out of Black right there and then.

Bastard. Scumbag. You mother fucking betrayer.

Remus never liked not being in control. Not having it scared him too much, feeling more animal than man. He did everything to avoid being violent, the wolf was already violent enough and had too much control and Remus refused to let it dictate human him. There was already too much violence, he never wanted to contribute more.

He did everything not to be a monster. But it's like the wolf roared from deep within, scratching and begging to let him pounce.

Remus wasn’t violent — anyone who met him would vouch for that. Fuck, if he saw a spider, he would open a nearby window and release it. But now, he wanted to slam Sirius against a wall and wrap his hands around his neck and squeeze.

You piece of shit. Wanker. Twat. I want you to feel as much pain as I do.

“Moony, please let me explain —”

All the words suddenly blurred before Remus slammed his book shut, causing to become still and quiet.

Sirius trying to explain — excuse his actions — pushed him over the edge. Remus sent a venomous glare at Sirius, waiting for him to talk. His quietness made everyone uneasy.

Selfish bastard.

Any sympathy Remus held for him this past year, along with any logic, evaporated to the point where he felt a rabid thump spread through him. There was a desperation to relieve himself of it — lash out, scream, cry —

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it,” the rest of the Marauders watched the scene, knowing not to get involved. “It was a mistake and —“

“A mistake?”

Sirius perked up at this. That was the only word he’d spoken to him since the incident. “Honest. I did it because —” “Shut the fuck up.” Remus stood, tall and loomed over Sirius. He could almost smell the fear off him.

He had never been so mad before.

“I — I… I,” stutters Remus. But instead of it being out of shyness or nerves, it was out of pure wrath that he wasn’t able to articulate his emotions properly. He took a deep breath in, attempting to regain control over his emotions but failed as he burned with deep, seething hatred. “I am the monster that mothers tell their children to keep them in at night.”

“Moony —”

“Don’t call me that!” His voice boomed so loud that everyone in the room had to take a step back and shrink down. Remus was always so reserved, only ever lashing out in annoyance close to the full moon but nothing more.

“Living up to your name, aren’t you?” There’s a sarcastic, bitter humour lilt to his voice.

Someone so in control of his emotions, someone with an unbreakable exterior, the only glimpses they’d ever seen of Remus losing control was him snapping at someone close to the full moon but would later apologize within mere seconds. But to see him like that… it was an intrusion, something the Marauders hadn’t ever seen or wanted to before.

“Please, just calm down so we can talk.”

Remus paces around the room. “You — y’know I’ve never understood why everyone lets you get around treating others like shit. First, it was Marlene, James, me, Peter, Lily and Y/N — we all let you get away with it. Outburst after outburst, we all sat back because you were going through shit. But I can’t? I’m not allowed to get angry?!”

Sirius wouldn’t look at him.

“Look at me.” Remus kept his voice low throughout the ordeal, only ever raising if Black interjected. “You coward, look at me!”

5. A lot of anger

He couldn’t meet his eyes so he settled to stare at the scar across his nose. It only angered him more as Remus picked Sirius up and pushed him against the wall as he fisted his shirt.

“I’m sorry.”

Sorry is nothing but a word to you. I gave you my most trusted secrets. I confided in you. I was there for you when you needed it. I loved and cared for you like my own brother but I was nothing more than a pet that you discarded when you got bored. You’re only guilty because of the repercussions you’re facing. Your guilt isn’t nearly enough. Bastard. I trusted you. You’re a Marauder. My best friend. I would’ve done anything for you. You fucking ruined it.

“You did this! You did!”

“I know. I’m sorry.”

He laughs, mocking and loud, void of any emotion. “No, you aren’t. You’re never fucking sorry!”

Stupid fucking selfish arsehole.

“For years you’ve told me that you accepted me — cared for me — loved me like your own brother! That what I am — a-a monster — that it didn’t matter!”

“It didn’t mean anything, I promise! It was a shitty, fucked up prank —”

“A prank?! You used me as a weapon! A toy because how could anyone ever love a werewolf?” Remus’ voice was so low. “You’ve never respected me. If you had any, you wouldn’t have — you - wouldn’t....”

Everything came crashing on Remus at once.

6. The realization settles in

And after nine days, Remus Lupin had finally realized what Sirius Black had done. Before, everything he felt had been true but he hadn’t fully realized the gravity of what happened, as silly as it sounds.

Sirius turned his worst fear into a living nightmare.

In the background, one of James’ Quidditch posters, encased in glass exploded, shattering into millions of pieces from the amount of pure magic radiating off Remus. He didn’t even flinch at the sound.

James finally interjected, placing a hand on Remus’ shoulder. “Lay off him… He isn’t worth it.”

Remus eased off Black instantly. “You had no right… no right…” He pointed. Remus turned his face down as he felt tears build up.

“I trusted you,” he whispers. “Every bit.”

Remus stormed out of the dorm, going to sleep in the common room.

━━━━━━━━━༻☽༺━━━━━━━━━

June 22nd, 1976

7. Depression

When Remus finally let himself cry, he didn’t make a move to leave his bed. Even skipping meal times, leaving James or Pete to bring him food.

Everything felt suffocating, a gnawing feeling that made every part of him ache. Remus couldn’t handle anymore pain or emotions from ‘the prank’ as he felt himself slip into a temporary void.

He hugged his pillow tighter and closed his eyes once more.

━━━━━━━━━༻☽༺━━━━━━━━━

June 23rd, 1976 | 11: 37 pm

Remus had gone straight to bed again, effectively shutting up the rest of the dorm. James was ignoring Black, leaving Remus surprised that he hadn’t made a move to defend his actions. Nonetheless, he was appreciative still. Peter had been trying to appease everyone, not taking sides but still must’ve thought Sirius was in the wrong because he hadn’t talked to him much.

He didn’t ask James to choose between him or Black. Remus was never one for ultimatums but even then, it seemed like James picked him. He was beyond furious, seemingly more than Remus at this point who pathetically wallowed in his depression. He wouldn’t spare Black a second glance, wouldn’t talk to him, shut him down if he tried to speak to him. Hell, he’d even gone as far as to make it very clear to the entirety of Hogwarts that they were no longer friends, making sure to not sit with him, ever. Always choosing to sit by Remus.

They chose his side and a part of Remus felt elated to know they had his back.

This left Black alone, looking at them through tearful gazes. Remus had been ignoring all of them and they seemed to be understanding, avoiding crossing the wordless boundary Remus set in stone.

But, both James and Peter had been checking up on him nightly, always there and he could tell they were getting impatient.

When the lights went out, he heard James crept out of bed. Usually, Remus would find some sort of comfort in knowing who was approaching him, but now, it only left him feeling uneasy.

And then he felt the bed dip and James muttered out a spell.

“Hey, Moony.”

Remus didn’t face him. “Prongs?”

“Hey,” there was a loud sigh, “Do you need anything?”

What was he supposed to say? A hug? To talk? He’d much rather use his avoidance strategy, although he realized it left him alone with too many thoughts and nobody to confide in.

“M’good.” He felt James place a hand on his shoulder.

“I’ll always be there for you. That’s what Marau - that’s what friends are for, no?”

Remus didn’t answer and felt James move to leave. But before he had the chance to slip out, Remus peeked his head from the drapes, announcing just loud enough for Sirius to hear.

“Thanks for saving all of us, James. You’re a true friend.”

━━━━━━━━━༻☽༺━━━━━━━━━

June 24th, 1976

People had their poisons.

Alcohol can make you forget. It blocks out everything and makes the rest of the world fade away until you can’t remember. People gambled to feel a rush, only to realize they dug themself into irreversible debt. Shopping, food, the high from risky behaviour…

But how we manage our poisons is up to the person.

People love to deny that they have addictions. They deny they’re hooked, they deny that they can’t put it down, they deny that they’re scared or want to stop. People only see what they want to see, believe what they want to believe.

And then the truth becomes muddled with lies that it’s hard to recognize the poisons sitting right in front of us. And all we want is more.

For Remus, his poison, his bright red self-destruction button, was smoking.

Granted, he never was a big smoker, typically only smoking when stressed or bored. But he still did it, filling his lungs with poison. But maybe he was wired like that. Besides, what werewolf lives past thirty? Might as well die revelling in the poison that brought him ease…

Remus conjured a ball of bright fire from his hand; fishing out a pack of cigarettes, slipped it past his lips and lit it. He inhaled, feeling the familiar, comforting feeling before dragging it from his lips, blowing out the thick cloud of smoke that left him wanting more.

He’d been sticking to his avoidance tactic strictly now. The Marauders were hovering over him, worry evident on their faces. A few times, Lily and James both invited him to sit. They never fought anymore, or at least in front of him, and it probably was his doing — a group effort into getting him to talk.

So even Lily knew something was wrong… Snape probably told her…

The door clicked open and Remus didn’t have to turn around to know how it was.

“Leave me alone. I’m not ready to talk.”

“Wasn’t gonna make you.”

He spun around, that wasn’t James or Peter. His face softened.

“Well… I’m not,” Y/N said simply, “But the others are about to.”

Remus groaned at that but Y/N smiled and turned around, ushering him over with a little wave. In one hand, she raised the Marauder’s map. “C’mon, I know a place and that they won’t be able to find.”

Remus was intrigued. He stepped out the butt of the cigarette, flicked it into the trash and followed her. Surely he’d already been there but being with Y/N seemed ten folds better than being around the other Marauders.

He followed wordlessly, passageways flying through his head but she never stopped by them. Instead, she climbed onto a ledge, slipping into an area under a large curtain. He followed, eyes lighting up in awe. He’s definitely never been there before.

“Get comfortable,” she said, flinging him a pillow and lighting a few candles.

They sat opposed to each other in complete silence. Y/N flicked back and forth, watching James and Peter scrabble around the castle looking for him. A few times, they passed by, each time leaving Y/N amused.

Remus tapped his leg anxiously. The question remained: Why wasn’t she disgusted with him? Why was she helping him? Why wasn’t she afraid?

Now alone together, those questions dangled on his tongue.

“Why aren’t you afraid of me?”

She looked up at him, finally putting down the map. “Because you’re Remus.” She said, like it was the most obvious answer. “You’re not scary.”

8. Hold onto doubt

The answer irritated him. Another memory unfolded then and he blurted it out. “Why didn’t you cast any spells at me?”

Her brows rose, “I didn’t want to hurt you.”

“I’m dangerous.” His voice was bleak and cold. “Why can't you grasp that?”

She stays quiet for a long time, her head turning to look out the large window. Y/N watched the owls and labyrinth of ancient trees of the forbidden forest and Remus was painfully aware of time slipping by.

“Do you remember that night on the astronomy tower on Halloween? I said that there’s bound to be someone looking at the moon at the same time?”

It takes Remus a moment to remember, but he does. “Yeah. You said that it’s like you’re not alone.”

Y/N turns around to face him. “Exactly. You don’t have to be alone in this.”

He looked away, deliberating. “It’s one thing for me to be alone but then drag you and others down with me.”

“Remus, I’m not going to lie and say I wasn’t scared. I was terrified. I thought that was it.” He gulped. “But I could never be scared of you. The real you - the you right now. I don’t care about what you are. You are more than just a werewolf. I feel safe with you.”

The dark shadows surrounded them as she reiterated herself. “You don’t have to be alone in this.”

He soaks in her words for a while. This time, peering out the window as he breathes in deeply.

Okay. He decided.

“Do you want to know how I got —” he pointed at a scar on his upper forearm. “— this?”

She nodded her head.

“When James turned into his animagus form to show me for the first time, his antlers pierced my skin. I had to lie to Pomfrey and say I fell while playing Quidditch.”

Any invisible barrier between them crashed instantly as she smiled brightly and laughed. So infectious, Remus couldn't help but flash a real grin.

He never realized how beautiful her smile was.

“Oh, and if you ever tell anyone about this place, I’ll skin you.”

“I would never.”

Remus scouted over to her, pressing his back against the cool stone as they sat together in a comfortable stillness. But then she shifted, opening her arms wide. He lent in without hesitation and her arms flung around his neck, pulling him into a tight embrace.

He felt salty tears stinging in the corners of his eyes and let himself soak in her warm.

He really needed that.

Over her shoulder, he returned to watch the stars.

9. Acceptance

Remus learned from a young age that it was better to keep people at an arm's length. Get too close, they’ll dig, find out his condition, fear him and run.

He hates to say it, but he’s not surprised that his secret slipped out. He got too comfortable, got too close... It’s just that the Sirius component was surprising.

But maybe it wasn’t surprising. Ever since the beginning of the year, especially since winter break, Sirius had been reckless more and more lately, and he probably should have seen it coming. He was wild as a result of being freed from the confines of his rigid upbringing.

Sirius Black was unpredictable.

Sirius Black was dangerous when it came to secrets.

Sirius Black was one of his best friends.

Sometimes betrayal is so profound that there’s no way to fix what was lost. The damage is done, irreplaceable, unfixable.

If Remus was sure of anything by the end of that week was that,

a) James Potter and Peter Pettigrew were still his best friends,

b) He almost killed Severus Snape and Y/N L/N,

c) Y/N knew his secret and despite everything, continued to talk to him, support him, be there for him — she accepted him,

d) His walls went up a higher, became stronger and insecurities ran deeper,

e) Lastly, Remus Lupin would never, ever forgive Sirius Black for what he did. Never.

━━━━━━━━━༻☽༺━━━━━━━━━

【 Next Chapter 】

© gotkindabored 2021. Do not repost or modify

[tennessoui]

I’m obsessed with all your fics and you but the a/b/o fic with a pregnant obiwan is killing me I love the floof so much

so happy you like the roadtrip au as it's one of my favorites too!!!

have about 2k more because youre awesome <3

(squick: a/b/o)

They’re somewhere in eastern Ohio when Anakin clears his throat and turns down the music. Obi-Wan’s back in the front seat with him, munching on a stick of beef jerky he’d never in a million years eat if it hadn’t been the most appetizing thing in that last gas station. Obi-Wan hates these cravings, can’t make sense of them at all, seeing as he hasn’t even eaten beef in fifteen years.

Anakin had just laughed and bought five different flavors, just to make sure Obi-Wan had something he liked.

All the rest of the food is in the back on his nest, which makes Obi-Wan a little grumpy because the only thing that should be on his nest is him and Anakin, but it’s not like there’s anywhere else for the food to go. Obi-Wan needs all the room in his seat to stretch out his legs, and if they put the food in the trunk then they’d have to stop every hour or so for Obi-Wan to get out and get it, which wouldn’t work at all, because Anakin doesn’t like it when Obi-Wan leaves the car, even if it’s just to walk around the side of the car to the trunk.

So the food is in his nest and Obi-Wan is coping with that intrusion fairly well. There’d only been some light pouting about it before Anakin had offered to keep it beneath his feet, but that would be too dangerous to even really consider, and Obi-Wan had shut up. His alpha would just be stupid enough to try it, too, if he thought that’s what he really wanted.

But. Obi-Wan’s munching on a long piece of beef jerky like it’s a carrot, and he’s thinking about what sort of things he should be eating for the sake of the baby, when Anakin turns down the music and clears his throat.

At first, Obi-Wan thinks this is because this is his music hour, and Anakin is just tired of listening to it.

But the alpha is tapping nervous beats on the steering wheel, not in time with the song at all, and it makes Obi-Wan pay attention.

“So you never told me what this alpha was like,” Anakin says, staring straight ahead. “This...uh.”

“Set,” Obi-Wan supplies.

Anakin’s proud jaw flexes and he purses his lips as he changes lanes. No one’s coming from behind them and they’re not about to pass anyone, but Obi-Wan’s a terrible driver, so he’ll give Anakin the benefit of the doubt.

“Right,” the alpha says. “Set. You never told me what Set was like.”

Obi-Wan takes a bite of his jerky so he doesn’t have to respond right away.

The truth is, he doesn’t particularly remember what Set had been like, other than surprisingly eager to get into his pants. He’d smelt vaguely like leather and rain, but what in Seattle didn’t smell vaguely like rain?

He’d looked like Anakin in the low light of the bar. He’d had the same jaunt to his nose, the same thick eyebrows. Almost--but not quite--the same color of hair. He’d been an alpha who looked like Anakin but looked at Obi-Wan the way Anakin never would.

And that had made Obi-Wan indefensibly weak.

“Ah,” he says instead of saying any of this. “I…”

“Never mind,” Anakin decides just as suddenly as he’d spoken. “You don’t have to tell me. If you don’t want to.”

“It’s not that I don’t want to…” Obi-Wan trails off, unsure of how to continue. Anakin’s tense on the other side of the car, and his scent is heavy and everywhere. “It’s just that we didn’t....ah.” He clears his throat and looks out the passenger window. “We didn’t talk much.”

The car swerves just slightly. Anakin must be tired. They’ve been on the road for nine hours, with the frequent stops calculated in.

“I think we should stop soon for the night,” Obi-Wan proposes when Anakin makes no move to say anything else.

“You didn’t talk much?” is the alpha’s reply. The tone is unreadable.

Obi-Wan blinks, his hands finding their way to his belly as he looks over at his alpha. Unreadable usually means angry when it comes to Anakin, but Obi-Wan doesn’t understand why.

“You just...what, you just saw him across the room making drinks and that was enough? Skilled with his hands, was he?”

Obi-Wan inhales sharply. They’ve been friends for so many years that they’re comfortable enough around each other to make jokes about their sexual preferences and partners. But this isn’t a joke. This has teeth and Obi-Wan’s already feeling sensitive. “I just...I was lonely,” he mutters, turning his body away from the alpha. “He reminded me of something, I don’t know. He was sweet. And clever and he made it clear what he wanted.”

Anakin draws in a breath, but Obi-Wan doesn’t particularly want to hear anything else. “I want to be done for the day now,” he tells the alpha as a blue sign with the next exit’s hotel options flash by them. “Please stop at the next exit.”

For a second, Obi-Wan isn’t sure if Anakin will, but the alpha surprises him by slowing down and taking the exit.

It’s nothing special, the motel they find. Feeling a little bit angry and childish about it, Obi-Wan demands that Anakin stay in the car while he goes and gets them a room. His alpha’s nostrils flare as the tendons in his neck stand out, but he agrees.

Good. He can stink up the car with his pheromones while Obi-Wan gets things done. Typical alphas.

Despite what Anakin seems to think will happen if he lets Obi-Wan out of his sight for longer than five minutes, the attendant at the hotel gives him no trouble at all.

“And would you like a single or a double?” the woman asks, staring at her computer. Obi-Wan falters.

He wants to say double, because he thinks it’s necessary to reestablish lines and boundaries between himself and his al--the alpha. He doesn’t want to take advantage of Anakin, feels awful just thinking about it. He wants to say double, because they’re just two friends taking a road trip together. They can afford two separate beds.

He wants to say double.

“A single should be fine,” is what his mouth says instead.

The woman hums agreeably and keys two cards with the information. He finishes the transaction feeling as if he’s underwater. What has he done? The woman hands him the cards and he walks out of the lobby in a daze.

His alpha is already mad at him for reasons he doesn’t really understand. How mad will he be when he finds out that Obi-Wan couldn’t control his omega side again, and now he has to spend the night pressed up against him? Sure, they’ve done that before, for weeks now. But this is different. Anakin can’t just leave if he decides Obi-Wan’s become too clingy. He’d have to sleep in the car if he needed to go.

The thought pulls a distressed keen out of Obi-Wan’s throat, and he doesn’t have time to banish his anxiety from his scent before Anakin’s there. The man hadn’t even been waiting in the car where he’d left him. He’d been leaning against one of the pillars of the hotel’s entrance. Obi-Wan has the ridiculous mental image of Anakin slowly slinking closer while Obi-Wan was inside, getting out of the car to lean against the door, then moving to lean against the trunk, then to one of the columns that holds up the ceiling of the drive-in entrance. Then to the entrance itself when Obi-Wan was taking too long.

The thought makes him more distressed. Anakin is such a good, protective friend, and Obi-Wan is still taking advantage of it.

Anakin is quick to wrap his arms around Obi-Wan and pull him into his chest in the shade behind one of the potted plants just outside the sliding double doors. He sniffs at his neck and then runs his hands up and down his sides as if he’s afraid someone had pulled a knife on the pregnant omega in the ten minutes he’d been inside.

“What’s wrong, what happened,” Anakin murmurs, resting his hands on Obi-Wan’s tummy. “Did someone say something? Are you alright? Omega, Obi, what’s wrong?”

“Nothing,” Obi-Wan sniffles, holding out the keys to their room. “They were…”

And then he lies. It’s about protecting himself, his child, he thinks. If Anakin leaves now, who will protect them both? He needs the alpha. More than that, he needs Anakin.

“They were out of double rooms,” he hears himself say. He grips at Anakin’s shirt with both of his hands and turns his wet eyes upward. He needs to keep Anakin looking at him and not at the mostly deserted parking lot. And Anakin’s the type of alpha who would drop anything to help a distressed omega. That’s always been Obi-Wan’s experience, at least.

“Are you…” Anakin furrows his brow and strokes over Obi-Wan’s tummy again. He’s had a fascination with it since the beginning of the pregnancy. “Are you upset you have to share a bed with me?”

“No!” Obi-Wan gasps, offended that that’s even the conclusion Anakin has drawn. “Of course not! I just...I’m sorry you don’t get the choice….” He falls silent when Anakin pushes his thumb against his lips.

“Obi, it’s alright, baby,” he murmurs. “I don’t mind, I really don’t. We’ve shared beds for years now. Why would this be any different?”

Obi-Wan pouts against Anakin’s finger, and the alpha graciously removes it. “Because...you wouldn’t be able to leave and sleep somewhere else if I’m…” he wants to say too much, but he doesn’t know how to phrase it in a way that won’t make Anakin say something he doesn’t mean out of sympathy for him,

“Didn’t we go over this already?” Anakin murmurs, petting his hair and making Obi-Wan look him in the eyes. “I’m not leaving you, Omega.”

It feels as if Anakin’s slipped in a bit of Alpha command, what with the way Obi-Wan’s body reacts to this. But what would the command even be?

“Let’s go get our stuff for the night, yeah?” his alpha says. “We can get the bed all set up in a nice nest, take a nap, and then find somewhere to eat. Are you craving anything in particular?”

Obi-Wan thinks about it as Anakin grabs his hand and leads him back to the car. Anakin takes out both their suitcases, but won’t even let Obi-Wan wheel one in.

He’s given the bag of snacks to carry instead, along with Anakin’s college sweatshirt.

“Pancakes,” he decides. “I really want pancakes.”

“Then that’s that,” Anakin smiles down at him. “Nest, then nap, then pancakes for the omega.”

“And the baby,” Obi-Wan says, framing his stomach with both hands.

Something dark flashes across Anakin’s eyes, but it’s gone before he can get a read on it. It hadn’t been anger though, he knows that for sure.

“And the baby,” Anakin agrees.

[turnmeintoastar]

“ rose-pink bliss ”

summary: a boy who seeks escape, finds it in the most unexpected place.

         The life of a noble was not easy. As appealing as life in a big castle; servants, ready to deliver your most perverse longing; delicacies from overseas;  gold; jewels; and swanky clothes — [m/n] fancied the latter, mostly — sounds, endless balls, foreign and unwanted suitors, parental protectiveness — to be read as “overprotectiveness” —, and relentless efforts on hosting a successful bride-show, were not so much.

         In the middle of another hellish ball, [m/n] was not doing so good. Yes, of course, the food cooked by the skilled chefs of [l/n] Park was delicious, and the orchestra has been playing his favourite tune just fine. Something, however, was terribly bugging [m/n] for the whole night. No, not the persistent, borderline annoying, partner he was stuck with — he was used to such matters, smile and sway along, he has been telling himself.  Something, was not right.

         “M’Lady, please, allow me,” a voice cut through his trance. [m/n] snapped his head to his right, startled, uncle. No, Zhongli was not related to him, by blood, at least, but he has been with [m/n] through the most of his childhood and teenage years. Hiding her small smile and a faint blush behind her flower ornamented fan. Performing a small act of  reverence, they parted their ways. The woman, now, dancing with Zhongli. [m/n] silently made eye contact, nodding gratitude,  Zhongli nodding back.

        [m/n] did not waste the opportunity on escaping  — these shenanigans, surely, shall be the end of him. Straightening his posture, he was about to stroll off, to find the reason of his displeasure. Just as he was about to leave the ballroom, an arm sneaked around his shoulders.

         “Lil’ bro,” its owner cheered, “how’s the night going?”, [m/n] swore he was not a violent person, like his acquaintance, for instance ,Scaramouche, now, he was a violent person; [m/n], never.

         “Go choke, Old Man,” he grumbled. Childe was not his preferred company. Not now, not ever.

         “Don’t be like that! Who was the man who sent Zhonli, hm? Me! I did! And for what? I should a t least get a kiss,” the ginger whined, throwing his arms up in exaggeration. [m/n] merely rolled his eyes.

         “Wonderful proposal. I ,unfortunately, ought to decline. Shall we count that as payment, for all the times you almost beheaded me, Dear?”, [m/n] tapped his finger on Childe’s forehead. The man was tall, but [m/n] was not of small ones, either.  Childe was left with a heavy blush and mumbling something along “little, spoiled brat and “oh, you just wait”.

         [m/n] walked out of the residence; the sun had already set, and the only thing illuminating the flower labyrinth was the faint glow of his vision, dangling from one of his belt-loops. He took a slow pace as he stepped inside the maze. Living in the castle for over [age] years, he had memorised every little thing about the place. The garden was the place he has been the most fond of.

         Thoughtlessly walking amidst the calming walls of roses, he was startled by the faint “hm” and “uh”s from the other side of the wall. After some time, he could detect faint sounds of a musical instrument.

         “Would you like some help, um.. Sir..?” he asked, finding a quick path to the other side was easy for [m/n], trying to sound confident in the assumption he made regarding their gender.

         “Ah!” the stranger yelped.

         “Ay, did you hear that?” a deep voice, [m/n] could assume it was one of the guardians.

         “Yeah, let’s go look,” another voice, higher, ordered. [m/n] could not care less about their antics, he was more than capable of protecting himself, and he wanted some peace.  “No, I’m just fine! Just a little slippery here,” [m/n] answered from inside the maze.

         “Young Master, do you need any help? We can bring you fresh clothes if yours got dirtied,” the first voice, again, voiced.

         “Just go! I’m good! Not dirty at all,” he ordered them away. With a few words, they departed.

         “Six guards..That could get me in trouble,” the boy on the ground laughed.

“You’re either a creep that's been watching over me and memorised the place or a very good guesser.”

         “Neither, I’m actually a musician,” the boy boasted, twirling a lyre in his hands.

         “I don’t think musicians  do that. And they certainly do not invade property, boy,” [m/n] glared, a little suspicious of the young man before him.

         “Hey! I’m no ‘boy’! Venti the Bard, for you!” he turned away with a huff and crossed arms.

         “Never heard of such a bard, and I know a lot, are you not from here?”

         “I’m from Mondstadt,”

         “What brings you here, to Liyue?” [m/n] shot.

         “Heard there was a big celebration. I am where the fun is,” Venti sat criss cross on the grass.

         “And what did you want there?” obviously, Venti has just answered, but [m/n] was a curious fellow.

         “I heard the host's son — they have three of them, I believe — was a great storyteller! The oldest one,” [m/n] rolled his eyes. Always his brother, never him.

         “Then you should go, he’s now in the mood,” he commanded, turning away with a harsh glare.

         “Hey! Can you at least tell me your name? Lead me out of here, at most!” Were strangers always annoying? [m/n] could not tell.

         “[m/n] [l/n]. Second born son of the host,” the last part was not necessary, yes, but he was going to prove his coolness to this Venti person.

         “Oooh!” Venti was standing now, eyes gleaming in interest.

         “Does he also have any talents?” Venti asked. For some peculiar reason, [m/n] found himself smiling and his chest being tingly. Venti was pretty. Definitely [m/n]’s type.

         “He’s the first to receive a vision in his bloodline, he’s a skilled artist, a wonderful diplomat, and..” he was unsure on how to say that and not sound funny.

         “‘And’ what?” Venti prompted. [m/n] walked closer to Venti. Towering over the bard, he leaned closer to his right ear.

         “He’s great in bed,” [m/n] held a prideful and arrogant smirk on his lips, Venti saw when he pulled away. Venti wanted to say many things; be it a cocky reply of a small dick joke, or a flirtatious ‘prove it then, sir’, or to just look into his [color] eyes and be hypnotized by his mesmerizing voice. Venti wanted it all, he himself concluded.

         “Now, boy, don’t get lost,” [m/n] said, turning away and starting to walk away. Venti just stared at him; still in shock from either his looks or his from the thing he said earlier, possibly, from both.

         “And? Do you need a special invite? We’re going inside, you’re my companion for tonight,” [m/n] playfully rolled his eyes and smirked from behind his shoulder, making eye contact with, now, smiling Venti.

         Venti has never been this enamoured by someone in his whole life. Be it how gentle [m/n]’s touches were, or how many funny or peculiar stories [m/n] has come to share. Venti had fallen in love with [m/n], hard. And his object of affection could not deny his liking, too. The smiles that Venti gave him, and the short melodies he played, and the way he talked and looked, — everything about Venti.

         When they neared the ballroom, [m/n] shared a smile with Venti. Not one of his cocky or prideful ones, a smile born of pure love and affection. He then extended his hand, doing a small bow. Venti took his hand, and they entered. Not the looks Venti got, about his unfit clothing, or the girls trying to steal [m/n] for a dance could stop them.

         Tonight was going to be fun.  

[space-helen]

Sweep

Words: 1460

Pairing: Nick Stokes x Reader

A/N: Not proof read again but I wanted to get something out for you all. I hope you enjoy! :)

Request: Maybe a dangerous situation, someone hurt, protective I dunno.I just like to read more nick x reader ^^ - @pumpkinfriend

______________________

The house was cold and uninviting. An eerie silence echoed throughout the property. You followed the police officer ahead of you into the room the victim lay, Nick a couple of steps behind you.

The police officer gestured to the body “We’ll be outside. Call if you need us.” and with that they were gone.

You looked around the study for a moment. “Interesting house layout.” you commented

Nick agreed “Study leads into the bedroom. No living area.”

“Maybe studying was his way of life.”

The man laughed and started to snap pictures of the man in his desk chair. Taking another look you could clearly see the gunshot wound to his head. “It was reported an hour ago right?”

The man nodded “yeah. Reported when neighbours heard the shots. Officers were the first to find his body, still waiting on Superdave to arrive.”

“Poor guy.” you snapped pictures of the photo frames nearby. The shelves looked like they’d been rummaged through. “Looks like he was close with who I can only assume were his parents.”

“He’s really young too. Officer said twenty three.”

“Nice place for a twenty three year old.” you commented “A big collection too. You don’t often see someone this young with material like this.” you gestured to some books on the shelf. “You’ve got it covered here?”

Nick nodded “Yeah, yeah. You take the bedroom.”

You moved across the room through the door into the bedroom. You took in your surroundings and snapped pictures. The man had lived what seemed to be a very clean, and organised lifestyle.

You noticed a drawer in the bedside table open, taking a picture of it, you carefully moved towards it and opened it. Snapping a picture of the inside you noticed that it was unorganised, a huge contrast to the rest of the room. You contemplated moving through to the previous room to grab print powder when you noticed that the wardrobe door was slightly ajar. You could have sworn it wasn’t when you’d come into the room.

Looking through the photos on your camera a cold chill went through your spine “Nick it looks like we have a ghost in here.” you nervously called. But just as the words left your mouth an arm was around your neck and you were being pushed harshly into the wall. 

You fought against the man’s grasp and he tugged at your camera that was around your neck to bring you close to him. Wrapping his arm around your neck he squeezed, slowly cutting off your air. Kicking and scratching at the man you finally got free and called for Nick. You were unsure if he even heard you.

The man grabbed you again and pushed you harshly to the floor. You felt a vase smash beneath you on your way down, it must have been knocked over in the struggle. You got to your feet and attempted to move away again.

“Y/N?” Nick instantly reached for his gun when he saw the sight in front of him but instead of drawing it he rushed to break up the fight. 

Amongst the struggle between the three you were pushed into the wall and hit your head. Sinking to the floor the realisation your legs and hand were bleeding settled in even though the fight before you was still underway.

Nick pushed the man into a corner and drew his gun. “Hands up. I said hands up.” The man obliged and Nick called for the officers. “Smart move pal.” Nick spat as two officers dragged him away. 

The original officer who’d shown you into the property hung back to talk to Nick. “I’m sorry, we did a sweep of the property but-”

“Well now you know for next time to do it better.” he came across slightly patronising “I’m sorry I didn’t mean it like that. Accidents happen, just don’t let it happen again.”

“I understand.” was all the officer said before disappearing. 

Nick quickly made his way over to you. “Y/N? You good?” he took in your features, you were really beat up.

“I’ve been better.” you tried to laugh but it sounded pathetic.

“The first aid kit’s in the other room let me grab it.” The man pushed some hair behind your ear before running into the next room and returning with the first aid supplies. “Now let’s see what I can do before we get you some real medical help shall we.”

You laughed.

“Alright. Show me your hand I can see it’s bleeding.”

You obliged “I cut it on the vase. I think. Also got my leg too but I haven’t checked it out… I’m scared too. It feels bad.” 

He nodded “Your hand doesn’t look too bad just some scrapes.” he gestured to your trouser leg “May I?” you nodded and he rolled it up.

You winced at the pain and he apologised “It’s ok.” you squeeze your eyes tight. How bad is it?” you could feel the warm wetness on your knee.

“It’s not nothing. I’ll clean it up a little but I think you have some glass in there. I don’t want to mess with it too much but I’ll do my best.”

“Thank you.”

The man got to work on your knee. During a particularly painful part you reached up and grabbed his shoulder. The man allowed you to squeeze it.

“Alright that’s all done. Anything else?”

“I hit my head pretty bad.” you admitted “It hurts a lot.” the splitting pain from initially hitting it had eased slightly but it was still bad. 

“Feel sick? Drowsy?”

“No, it just hurts.” 

“Alright.” he nodded to himself “What a ghost hey?”

You genuinely laughed this time. 

“Now that’s what I like to see. Alright, let’s get you to the hospital.”

“The scene-”

“We technically can’t take it anymore because of this little…” he words trailed off.

“Yeah, yeah I knew that.” you shook your head “I’m sorry I just forgot.”

“Hey, don’t be sorry.”  He gave you a sad smile as he packed away the supplies. “Ready to stand?”

You nodded “I might need some help” The man got to his own feet in front of you.

“That’s ok.” he put his hands out and you took them gratefully. “On three. One, two, three.”

On his count you got to your feet and he supported you. As you stood you attempted to take some uneasy steps.

“It’s alright I’ve got you.” he reassured. 

You smiled as he slipped a bag strap over his shoulder. “We’ll stop at the hospital first then go back to the lab.”

“Sounds good to me.” 

The man kept you close and supported you as you walked out to the car, he helped you into the passenger's seat before throwing his kit into the trunk and slipping into the driver's seat.

The journey to the hospital was quiet, and he kept looking at you throughout to make sure you were awake and ok. Although you said you were fine he couldn’t help but worry.

Nick parked up the car and was at your side instantly opening the door and helping you out. He sat you down in the waiting area before registering you into the emergency room it didn’t take long for someone to call you into a room. Nick stayed silent and by your side the entire time, watching the Doctor clean and dress the wound appropriately.

“That’s you all set. I’d suggest staying away from heavy work or even taking the rest of the day off. Rest the leg and let it heal.”

And with that you were being sent away from the busy emergency room. 

“Back to the lab or home?” Nick offered, knowing which you would pick.

“Lab. I need to make myself useful in some way. Even if it’s just looking at footage or research.”

“Thought so.” he smiled “You just won’t stop will you?”

“Stopping isn’t in my nature.”

“You know they’re going to try and force you to take time off and give you the ‘don’t push yourself’ talk right?”

“I know I just can’t be home alone. I feel like I’m wasting my time.”

“I get that.” there was a pause “but seriously if you need some time off and want company take it and I’ll take some time as well.”

You took a second and thought it over “I can’t ask you to do that.” 

“Yes you can.” he laughed “We’ll get some take out and watch a movie.”

“Only if I can pick. The last movie we watched was terrible.”

“In my defence Greg picked out that movie.”

“True. We have another movie night with him tomorrow so you better pick a good one.” you teased.

“Only the finest.” 

Tag List: (open)

Nick Stokes: @wanniiieeee​  @pumpkinfriend

CSI:

[prettyvampiress96]

The Malfoy Secret - Chapter 3

Since the traumatic death of her last living relative, Anna had since been a guest in the Malfoy manor . Although she was by now a little more than a guest. Her aunt was peacefully laid to rest and throughout the whole ordeal the Malfoys were her absolute anchor to reality. Anna however still couldn't put her thoughts in order at the situation. On one hand Anna had wanted to go home but on the other hand she rather enjoyed the company of the Malfoys. Anna had previously attempted to return home twice. The first time Anna had gone to return home , Draco begged her not to leave claiming he wanted to make the most of her company before his return to his last term of third year next week.. The second time Cissa began fretting about her wellbeing. Her being worried about Anna all alone in that big house. So Anna agreed to stay to ease Cissa's conscience but did say that she would return before her first day of work at the Ministry. What Anastasia didn't know was that she would be the right hand assistant to Lucius himself. The letter enclosing said information remained unopened in the Rosier mansion.

The following week Narcissa and Lucius bid Draco farewell at kings cross station whilst Anna was already in the Ministry of Magic for her first day along with another student from her year . Anastasia now knew that she would be working with Lucius , she was relieved at least it was someone who wouldn't judge her by her name. Though the thought of being in such a confined space with the white haired man had butterflies filling the pit of her stomach. Lucius strutted into his office in the department of Magical Law Enforcement, halting in his footsteps at the sight of his darling Anna stretching on the tips of her feet to reach a book higher up on the shelf, Lucius held back a laugh as he took in just how miniature she was even in a pair of heels. Even though he adored that about her , he couldn't help picture in absolutely nothing but those heels all stretched out for him and for cissa of course. Anna hadn't yet realised he had entered the room she was too caught up in finding the book Mr. Crouch had requested. Lucius took this as his moment . He walked as quietly as he could towards her . When Anna was in his reach, his large hands held her hips , his long fingers digging in slightly. Anna's back pressed flush against his broad chest. Leaning down to her ear. "You want my help with that darling ?" He whispered pressing himself further into the girl. Anna blushed at the feeling of his hardened member making itself known. Easily reaching for the book , his hand could reach without him even trying. "By all means you can say no and I shall just sit back and watch as that little skirt rides up more and more. Its taking I have not to throw you over my desk and worship you right here babygirl" Lucius smirked as Anastasia let out a squeak at the pet name he called her. Lucius brought the book down to Anna's eyesight, offering it out to her , Anna still pressed against the overly large shelf. Before Anna could respond in walked Narcissa. Narcissa drank in the scene in front of her , the sight of her husband and hopefully her soon to be princess. Anastasia's face flushed a deep red as she resisted the urge to run into Cissa's arms. " My darling how lovely of you to join us isn't that right princess?" Lucius turned to face cissa while slipping a wink to Anna. "I .. Uh..you...I should get this book to Mr. Crouch " she said shyly unsure of how to respond , after all neither of them had spoken since her and cissa kissed. Anna couldn't help wondering is Narcissa regretted it. Bowing her head Anna moved to rush from the room. "WAIT, STOP" Narcissa called after her smiling as annas feet immediately come to a halt." Hurry back darling there's something we should all talk about". Anna nodded in response quickly exiting the room. Anastasia walked with the book in her arms just down the hall, knocking respectively , Anna awaited permission before entering. " Mr Crouch I'm terribly sorry if I am interrupting I'm just bringing the book you requested from Mr Malfoy" Anastasia informed showing the book as if she needed the proof. "Ah right yes, good good I do believe you may have just missed crossing paths with our young Mr Weasley. He took it upon himself to retrieve that book . A good boy he is . If that is all Miss Rosier I am rather busy I'm afraid" Mr Crouch, the minister of Magic himself said without raising so much as his head. Anna walked back to Lucius's office , the sound of her heels clacking with every step, when suddenly body blocks her way. "You know you'd think the slimy Slytherin's would crawl back into their holes rather than working for the Ministry . Your father was a blind fool to follow the dark lord . Tell me what would daddy think of his daughter now. Oh no thats right he got himself killed before you could wipe the drool from your chin? " Percy Weasley sneered at her . Anastasia's blood fuelled an inferno of rage and Percy was about to get a taste of the fire. Passer's by began to stop and watch while office doors seemed to open for the fellow workers to do the same. Annas eyes glazed over and she smiled a

sweet smile. " Don't you ever speak of my family in that way do you hear me ? You want to know what my 'daddy' thinks , insult me again and you'll be finding out" Anna threatened in a low voice her wand drawn and pressed into the younger Weasleys throat. Lucius Malfoy was the first to intervene , his hand pushing anna's armed one down. He ushered the furious girl into the office and she slowly began following. " Enjoy freedom while you can I'm sure they've got a cell in Azkaban with your family's name on call it an heirloom. As cold, dark narcissistic murderers run in your family dont they. When you slip up Rosier and you will . I will be the one to put you there myself" Percy shouted at her back. Taken off guard Percy hadn't expected Anna to throw 'stupefy at him knocking him down the hall by a few good feet . " Funny that if I'm to go to Azkaban it'll be for killing you. You're a no good blood traitor and yet you think you actually have the audacity to think you stand a chance against me. I know spells your mother couldnt even dream of mastering . You think you can talk about my family when you know absolutely nothing . I'll escort myself to Azkaban right now once I've sent your cold body to your mother. That dark enough for you saint Percy? Anna fumed her wand raised . Arthur Weasley emerged from the crowd , his wand drawn protecting his son. Lucius drew his wand and stood directly in front of Anastasia.

"Princess go, back to the office head held high cissy is there and I'll be right behind you "Lucius whispers so low only Anastasia could hear it. Anna nods confirming she had indeed heard his words but she was reluctant to walk away. When Lucius firmly commands her once again to go as she reaches the offices, she can already feel the tears fill her eyes and the burning sensation in her chest. Anna just wanted to scream . Instead she shuts the door and walks to her desk with her head down. Realisation hitting her like a tonne of bricks Anna slides down the nearest wall. Narcissa immediately running to the sobbing girl sitting next to her , Cissa cradled anna against her chest, rocking slightly whilst rubbing a hand soothingly on the black haired girls back.

"I'm not a bad person I've followed every rule. I've never put a foot wrong yet I'm still painted with the same brush as my father am I destined to be alone. Perhaps Azkaban is the best place for someone with a name like mine". Lucius having now dealt with the pathetic Weasleys returns just as Anna sobs those words. Seeing her so broken and seeing his wife so affected at those words only tempted Lucius to go back and seriously damage the disrespectful boy. Weighing his options, nothing was more important than his family and as of that his girls needed him. Narcissa who was still holding Anna raised her head to look at her husband , she tilted her head to the side silently asking what had happened out there.

He ushered Narcissa over to him which she does hesitantly. Torn between leaving Anna and finding out what had occurred . Narcissa's curiosity got the best of her. "Anna I'll be right back darling" Narcissa whispered assuringly. Lucius explains in a hushed whisper briefly what happened. Narcissa can't believe what she's heard. How could someone say something so cruel about her baby girl. Lucius made his way over to Anna and bent down, lifting her chin up to face him. " Don't you ever let me hear say that about yourself . We would never allow you to be put in that wretched place. A name does not define you. That boy knows nothing. He is nothing. You are my everything. Our everything " he would say pulling cissa to him as she steps nearer not wanting to scare Anna . "I'm yours. Like both of you?" Anna questioned back , her green eyes wide and her pink lips pouted in slight confusion. " Why don't we all go back home a discuss this over a drink hmm?" Cissa hinted holding her hand out for her husband and Anna to take .

They arrive back at Malfoy Manor and Anna takes a seat on the sofa in the front room with Cissa sitting on one side of her and Lucius on the other side. Lucius gently takes one of Anna’s hands in his and with the other hand gently turns her head to face him “Anna I meant what I said earlier you are our everything and I want to discuss you becoming apart of our relationship” He nods at Cissa before continuing “There is no pressure Anna, you can say no and we’ll respect your decision. It won’t affect our working relationship either.” Anna doesn’t respond straight away, feeling a little shocked at his offer. “Should you agree to be with us boundaries would be set in place, which leads me to my next question. What are your boundaries Anna?” Lucius’ voice soft as he looks into her eyes.

“I don’t have any boundaries as I’ve never done this before” Anna answers honestly as she holds his gaze for a moment before looking down at her lap, a look of confusion washes over his face “Anna had never been kissed before I kissed her two weeks ago” Cissa explained. Lucius places his fingers under Anna’s chin lifting her head up “Just to confirm Anna, you are a virgin?” She nods at him and feels her cheeks heat in a light blush. “We’ll take things nice and slow; we’ll go at a pace that suits you…if you agree to be ours that is.” Lucius tells her with a smile on his lips and Anna couldn’t help herself, she looked down at his mouth and licked her lips. Cissa nods agreeing with her husband “We will look after you. You will be safe with us…always” Cissa took hold of Anna’s other hand in hers and begun rubbing small soothing circles on the back of her hand with her thumbs.

Anna looks between Cissa and Lucius before speaking “I’d like to be yours, both of yours but I’m worried I cannot offer you much in return” Cissa turns Anna’s head so she is looking at her “Just by agreeing to be with us is giving us more than you can imagine. All we want to do is to make you feel loved, safe and of course pleasure you beyond your wildest dreams” Cissa smiles and leans forward pressing her lips to Anna’s in a quick but sweet kiss.

“If we overstep a boundary or you start to feel uneasy or anything just tell us. In fact, to be sure we are all comfortable with this arrangement I recommend we use safe words” Lucius said softly, his breath warm against her ear “Safe words?” Anna asked shyly and he chuckled lightly “Ahh so innocent my sweet girl” His fingers brushing her hair aside as he placed a soft kiss to her neck before continuing “Each of us picks a word that once spoken the others know enough is enough. The moment the word is spoken everything stops…straight away, no questions or explanations needed” Anna turned her head slightly so she was looking at him over her shoulder “I’d like to be yours, both of yours” He smiled at her before capturing her lips with his.

Lucius and Narcissa both hand in hand with Anastasia began escorting her up the winding black marble case not stopping until they reached the door to the master bedroom. Both Malfoys stood watching Anna's reaction as Lucius twisted the handle of the door pushing it open , allowing Anna the first step inside. Anastasia was in awe at the decoration. With a flick of his wrist Lucius had set candles alight causing a rather romantic atmosphere. Anna's hand was still laced with Cissa's, she was reminded off that when Narcissa squeezed her hand. " What do you think babygirl?" Cissa asked brushing a loose strand of Anna's hair from her face, leaning in she placed a soft kiss on Anna's lips . "It's beautiful Cissy . It really is" Anna breathed looking behind her for Lucius. When Anastasia noticed him still stood by the door only now minus his dress shirt , she reached her hand towards him wanting to touch . Lucius noticed Anna's hesitation and stepped into her reach, taking her hands he placed them on the centre of his broad chest. Anna's hands ran up over his bare shoulders and linked around his neck attempting to pull him down to her level due to the height difference. Anna could feel his intoxicating scent overwhelm her and she took the plunge pressing her lips to his . His kiss was different to that of Cissa's it was rougher and more dominant . Lucius's hands reached over the curves of Anna's ass and lifted her up, her legs wrapping around his waist as he walked them to the bed . A naked Narcissa joined the pair , running her fingers up anna's bare legs causing anna gasp allowing Lucius access to her tongue . Anastasia pulled back from her make out session , glancing at Narcissa, her eyes tracing over the perky nipples of her breasts. Anna's mouth ran dry . She had no idea what she wanted but god that woman was it. " Remember Darling we can stop whenever you like , tonight is all about you my pretty babygirl , mommy and daddy will make you feel so good I promise princess you just have to trust us" Narcissa spoke softly tapping her finger on the top button of anna's shirt. " Can mummy take this off baby " Cissa cooed , anna nodded and proceeded to remove the shirt herself only for cissa to stop her. "Let mommy do it angel please" Cissa asked again this time Anna nodded and allowed cissa to removed her top. Narcissa dropped the shirt to the floor her eyes never looking away from Annas full breasts, leaning forward cissa placed a wet kiss to the tops of her breasts. Ana in response arched her back unaware that her hips had rocked against the very non discreet package in Lucius's trousers. Narcissa's hands travelled lower and lower until they reached the waistband of the very tight skirt Anna had on. Cissa's fingers hooked into the band but waited for permission from Anna . "Princess Mommy's waiting for you "Lucius whispered in Anna's ear. Anastasia nodded fervently glancing down and the sight of a naked Narcissa between her thighs . Anna couldnt peel her eyes away. In a split second her skirt and panties were removed , Anna's core now slick and bare to Cissa who licked her lips in delight at the prize in front of her . "We can stop if you want to little princess, you just have to say and we promise we wont be disappointed in the slightest or should mommy continue" Lucius reminded . " No please Don't stop please dont stop "Anna pleaded . Her pleas were music to their ears. Lucius interlocked his fingers with Anna's , watching over anna's shoulder as his wife's head leant even closer to Annas blazing sex. Narcissa hummed as she dragged a finger through Anna's wet folds, shivering at the breathless gasp she made in response. Narcissa placed a soft kiss to either side of Anastasias inner thigh before connecting her warm tongue to her wet pussy. Anna's hips rose from the emerald sheets , her head thrown back into the crook of Lucius's neck and her grip on his hands getting tighter. " Is mummy making you feel good baby girl ? Let us hear those beautiful noises of yours petal" Lucius teased in advance. Anna mewled , feeling

an unfamiliar weight in the pit of her stomach. Narcissa continued flicking the sensitive bud while she introduced a single finger into Anna's tight hole preparing to stretch her out for Lucius. Slowly and gently Cissa began thrusting that finger in and out in time with the flicking of the bud . With her fingers getting so slick from Anna's running juices , cissa added a second finger and with every thrust in began spreading them apart . Anna's walls began to clench around Cissa's fingers locking them in place and her thighs tightening pulling cissa closer than she was. " Oh Oh Oh " Anna screamed as she rode her first ever climax down on Narcissa .Anna felt shifting from behind her as Lucius moved himself from the bed taking Cissa's place between Anna's thighs. Climbing above her Cissa placed a kiss to Anna's lips. "You did so well darling mummy's so proud of you. Does Daddy want a taste do you think? " Narcissa beamed down at her baby all glistening in sweat , glancing to her husband smirking. Lucius's hand reached across grabbing cissa at the chin, passionately kissing his wife all the while tasting the sweet nectar of his princess on her tongue. At some point during the exchange Lucius had removed his remaining clothing. Lucius tapped on Anna's thighs grabbing her attention. Narcissa sat near Annas head now it was her turn to watch the faces her baby pulled whilst screaming from the pleasure she was receiving. " Princess you need to listen just for a minute okay? Are you sure this is what you want? I won't lie to you my girl it might be a little uncomfortable at first but that passes. Are you absolutely sure?" Lucius needed to make her aware he'd never forgive himself if he hurt her . " Please I trust you Daddy I'd like to try. Help me try" Anna begged her voice sounding like a whine. Lucius wrapped his hand around his painfully hard cock swiping the pre-cum from the swollen head to lubricate it slightly. The combination of that and Anna's cum should be just enough.

As he slowly began to ease into her, Anna's walls clenched around him as a pained groan leaves her throat. Digging her nails into his shoulders as she squeezes her eyes shut tight, Anna's body tenses against his when he comes to a stop. His body trembling as he fights the lust inside him to thrust into his pretty little princess .When the pain starts to subside Anastasia slowly moves her hips .

"Please " was all Anna could muster out. Lucius takes her thigh and places it on his hip as he starts to slowly move against her . Quickly finding a steady rhythm, as his hips roll against hers both moving in perfect harmony , Anna could feel every thrust against her walls. Her nails leave red half-moon crescents on biceps. Narcissa sat back observing couldnt help but reach down and began circling her own clit. His name falls from Anastasia's mouth like a prayer when he finds that specific spot inside of her . "Fuck, Princess , you feel so good around Daddy" he moans as he thrust faster into her , pleasure invaded her senses as her vision begins to cloud , with her head thrown back Anna can no longer keep the moans inside of her . An inferno rages inside of her , Her hands fall from his arms to grasp at the sheets with such a force her knuckles began turning white. "Papi, I'm..." she moans out. " Let it go baby I'm here Daddy's here" Lucius coaxed. Anastasias walls enclosed around Lucius's cock , her nectar coating his manhood. With a last thrust into her Lucius emptied his load filling his princess up to the brim. Gently removing himself from inside her , Lucius laid to the right of Anna enclosing her in his arms, Narcissa laid to the left of Anna . "Our princess did absolutely perfect wouldn't you say so dear?" Narcissa asked Lucius. "Oh i couldn't agree more darling. How are you feeling Princess?" Lucius asked Anna. The three of them an entanglement of limbs. Until Narcissa rose from the bed and into the large bathroom followed by the sound of running water. " Come on Darling let us clean you up and put you in something comfy before you fall asleep" Narcissa commented. Anna however was quite tired and comfy as she mumbled incoherent words from where she was. Lucius scooped her up into his arms and took her into the bathroom himself. Narcissa already in the bath, held her arms out as he lowered his princess down into her lap. A scent of lavender and camomile filled their senses. Lucius lathered up a sponge and glided it over every inch of Anastasias body. Anastasia snapped from her dazed state smiling at both Lucius and Narcissa. Before putting her head down and playing with her fingers , a sign they had already noticed when she was nervous or embarrassed. " Princess Is everything alright darling? Are you hurt or in pain?" Cissa asked concerned she may be hurt . " No no nothing like that I was urm well I just wondered could I stay with you two tonight?" Anna asked so quietly that if they had been any further away they wouldn't have caught it. "Of Course you sweet girl you were always going to sleep in with us . We wouldn't have it any other way. Now why dont you let mommy wash your hair whilst daddy gets out and fetches you something comfy eh?" Narcissa said softly to Anna pulling her in for a cuddle in the warm water. With the girls dressed in Narcissa's nightgowns , Lucius had made a mental note to have cissa and anna go shopping soon. Lucius had already pulled back the covers and slid in, waiting for his girls to come out. "Which side should I sleep?" Anna asked Narcissa. They hadn't discussed that yet. " Why dont you sleep in the middle darling so that way we can both hold you" Lucius offered. Anna scrambled into bed followed by Cissa. Cissa took hold of Annas hand and kissed the knuckles.

"I'm so happy you agreed to be ours our darling girl "Narcissa expressed. Lucius turned on his side facing Anna and Cissa draping his arm across the both of them in a protective manner. " I love you both my precious girls" Lucius said lovingly. The three slept in each others embrace for the rest of the night.

[planecrashdreams]

Take My Breath Away

Peter Parker x Stark!daughter

Summary: The Avengers are close to unveiling The Vulture’s plan to destroy the city. They uncover that his son is throwing a ball with all of the most notorious villains within the city. It is decided that you, along with Peter, must attend to gather intel.

Warnings: *violence* *swearing* *fight scenes* *mentions of blood/wounds*

Peter & Y/N are 18

“F.R.I.D.A.Y., call everyone into the lab in 5 minutes, I need to have a meeting.” Tony announces while peering at the screen in front of him.

F.R.I.D.A.Y.’s voice floods the entire compound inviting everyone to meet with your dad. You however, were busy doing your homework with the boy you’ve had a crush on for what feels like a century.

“Ughh, not again. What does dad want this time?” You whine getting up from your chair.

“Come on, Y/N, it sounds important, he said he wanted us in the lab.”

“I’m not even an Avenger, why do I have to be involved?” You say slightly annoyed.

You and Peter were the last ones to join the meeting and your dad started talking almost immediately.

“I found a new lead on Vulture, his son Dimitri Toomes is having a party for all of the mafia bosses and criminals and that roam the city. This party is taking place tonight at 8pm. I’m going to get you Nat, and you Steve, to attend this party as a couple to uncover more intel as you can—“

“Wait, but, how old is this Dimitri Toomes anyway? Isn’t he just a kid?” Bucky interrupts.

“Yeah, isn’t he like 18 or 19?” Nat also jumps in.

“I don’t think sending Nat and Steve in for this mission is such a good idea, Tony. He would know not to trust them once he saw them. We need someone younger.” Bruce suggests.

“No, I’m not sending Peter in to do this mission. Peter hasn’t done many missions, and this one involves the mafia and every criminal in New York!” Tony says sternly.

“Well, we weren’t thinking Peter exactly...” Bruce says very quietly.

“NO! I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU WOULD EVEN THINK TO OFFER MY DAUGHTER TO GO ON A MISSION!” Tony yells loud enough for the whole city to hear.

“Yeah, uh, Bruce, I don’t know how much you’ve had to drink but sending me for this? What!??” You say very frightened and shocked.

“Tony, I know you would never want to do this in a million years, but hear us out. Dimitri is a young man, he’ll be easily persuaded if something strikes his interest. If we send Y/N, she’ll intrigue him and make him lower his guard and he could reveal his father’s plans. If we do this, we won’t send her alone. Someone will be there to watch out for her.” Bruce explains.

“I can’t believe I’m actually having to consider this plan.” Tony confesses.

“I’ll do it if you guys keep a close watch of me. I just want to get it done and over with.” You agree to Bruce’s plan but almost regret it.

“Y/N wants to go through with it, Tony? Are you okay going through with this?”

“Ok. But she goes in and she’s coming back out as quick as possible.” Tony finally agrees.

“We need to get ready now, the party starts in a couple of hours.” Tony leads the way out of the lab.

“Y/N, you’re going to need a dress to wear to this party. Steve, you’re going to be her chaperone and you’ll need a suit. Nat, Bucky, Thor—“

“Mr. Stark? Can I come and help keep watch of Y/N?” Peter interjects.

“Peter I’d feel more comfortable with you staying here in the compound.”

“Please, Mr. Stark, my spidey-sense can be helpful for this and I want to help keep Y/N safe an I kno—“

“Okay! Peter, fine, you can help Steve keep watch. Just be careful, and if I feel you’re not safe I will pull you out from the mission. Got it?”

“Yes! Thank you, Mr. Stark.” Peter beams, now he can keep watch on you to make sure you stayed safe.

Everyone headed off to help prepare for the mission and you headed up to your bedroom to get ready for what you thought was possibly the worst party ever.

Nat hung a few dresses on your closet door for you to wear tonight. But one caught your eye. It was gorgeous, it was a shade of dark blue. The fabric was silky and vibrant. The colour made your mind wander to a certain boy whose favourite colour is blue. Peter. “Well, I guess the night won’t be as terrible.” You thought to yourself happy that you got to feel pretty at least. The dress was a ball gown and sparkled in certain lighting.

You put your dress on and had Nat help you style your hair into a princess braid updo. You did your makeup, a few layers of mascara and a layer of pink peach tinted lip gloss. A simple look, but still radiated beauty. Your wore a pair of little black heels under your dress and went on your way downstairs.

Peter dressed himself in a simple black suit that he wore to the last school dance. He even shaved and gelled his hair a bit. Steve also dawned a suit, but dark grey. They went over a plan of how they would surveillance the party while keeping an eye on you. In the middle of their conversation, you start coming down the stairs. Step by step, Peter comes into your view and you smile taking in how handsome he was, especially in a suit.

Peter gasped looking at you, he couldn’t believe how gorgeous you were and wished he could’ve been the one spending the night with you. Just thinking about Dimitri being with you sent him into an internal rage. But looking at your smile takes him away from that thought. He realizes you’ve been standing there for almost a minute and he hasn’t said a word to you.

“Wow, you look... pretty.” Peter says rubbing his arms.

“Yeah, you really are beautiful, Y/N.” Steve adds.

“Aw, thanks guys. And you both look very handsome.” You say shyly.

Peter looks up at Steve with an annoyed look, jealous that he made a comment about your appearance. Steve just laughs messing with Peter.

You, Steve, and Peter all drive to Dimitri Toomes’ party and discuss what the game plan will be.

“Ok, here’s what I’m thinking, Y/N goes in and scopes for Dimitri, she talks with him and get him comfortable with her. She’ll lead him on with questions about his family business. Once we get enough intel, she calls it a night and we get her out of there. Y/N, you’re going to go by a fake name and say you’re the daughter of the mafia boss, Lorenzo Bianchi. Just make up answers the best you can to his questions. We’ll be in your ear the whole night and we’ll help you talk to him. Peter and I will walk around the party to look for any suspicious behaviour and to keep a closer eye on you. If at any time you don’t feel safe anymore, say “my head hurts” got it?”

“Yeah, I think so. I’m still really nervous about this.” You say scared about the whole situation you were about to enter.

“Don’t worry, Peter and I are with you the entire night. Just act natural and you’ll be okay. We are here.”

The three of you enter and immediately disperse. You enter the ballroom and turn heads as you move towards the bar. As you get to the bar, your eyes meet with a seducing glare. It almost made you uncomfortable but it was oddly alluring. You notice this man is young and clean cut. He was wearing a lighter suit with a dark black shirt. He was very tidy for a criminal.

“That’s him, Y/N. Across the bar from you. Make your move.” Steve says in your earpiece.

You instead have a better idea. You made sure his eyes were still fixed on you and flutter your eyes slightly and order yourself a drink. Just as you predicted, he got up from his seat and made his way over to you.

“Excuse me, miss, I don’t think I know you.” He says with a dark masculine voice.

“You’re right, you don’t know me.” You say slightly shocked at how unintentionally confident you were coming across.

“Beautiful and funny, now I’m sure I haven’t met you before.” He chuckles.

“Dimitri Toomes.” He says now leaning on the bar bench beside you.

“Francesca Bianchi.” You say now making eye contact with the man.

“You’re Lorenzo Bianchi’s daughter? Wow, he never said he had a daughter. A sexy one too.” He says looking over you with a venomous sound in his voice.

Peter was listening to this entire conversation and he was starting to get annoyed by Dimitri’s tone with you. His fist was squeezed tight and his knuckles turned white.

“Y/N, flirt back with him. You’ve got him attention and he’ll be easier to pry if he’s getting your attention back.” Steve suggests.

Peter is now dying inside, having to hear the conversation that’s about to happen. He wants to pull you away and not have you be flirted with by someone who only looks at you as a piece of meat.

“Well, I’m his little girl after all, he wants to protect me as much as he can. He wouldn’t want me to go out and find myself a new kind of daddy.” You say looking deep into his eyes and slightly biting your lip.

Both Peter and Steve stood still, mouth agape at what they just overheard you say. Peter was slightly turned on by your confident tone and how on the nose you were. He was still of course bothered that you were talking to Dimitri. Peter tried to keep his cool for the sake of the mission and your safety.

“Careful what you say, sweetheart. Wouldn’t want to say something you don’t mean.” Toomes says towering over you now with a very condescending tone.

“Who said I didn’t mean it? And any way, how do you know my father?” You ask, trying to push for information.

“Lorenzo is a friend of my father’s. My father is working on a plan to run the city better for the mafia. And how do you not know this? Does your father know you’re here?” Dimitri asks slightly suspicious of you.

“My father doesn’t like women being involved with his business. I just want to look out for my father, I don’t want him getting into trouble is all.” You say hoping this puts him off your scent.

“Ah, the delicate princess, of course, I mean, if you were mine, I wouldn’t let anyone touch you, except me of course.” He says now trailing his fingertips along your forearm to your hand.

Unsure of how to react you just play along with him hoping Steve or Peter will help direct your next move.

“You’ve got him wrapped around your finger, Y/N. Try getting more info out of him. He’s buying it.” Steve guides you. Peter at this point is speechless, he was stuck in an internal rage. He wanted to kill this guy just because he touched you.

“Dimitri?” You say with a higher pitch now hoping to sound too cute to decline.

“Hmm?” He hums in response.

“Could you tell me what my dad is planning on doing to make the mafia run better?” You ask fluttering your lashes, not breaking eye contact with him.

“I don’t know, Princess. I think it’s best to keep you out of it. Your father thinks so.” He says looking at you, now taking your hand and pulling you up from your seat.

“We can talk over by the balcony, it’s more private there, and I like my privacy.” He says very ominous. You were now feeling pale, unsure of what he meant by that. As you both move towards the balcony, your eyes meet with Peter’s and he looked concerned. He followed close behind the both of you, not daring to let you out of his sight.

“Now, Princess, I’ll tell you just a little bit to give you piece of mind about your your father. Your father works by conducting drug runs across the borders and selling drugs to smaller criminal groups within the city. Lately, the drugs have been resurfacing and the police have been finding out what groups are in possession of these drugs. Your father made a business deal with my father to make these weak groups disappear. My father in turn, had your father invest in most lethal warfare for taking over the city. As of now, our fathers have almost successfully taking over a stronghold, and they’re not stopping there.” He says, taking pride in his father’s work.

“Wow, I never knew my father would actually be helping take over the whole city.” You say in fake awe.

“But enough about that, I haven’t been able to take my eyes off of you tonight, darling. In the moonlight you are just mouthwatering.” He says, moving closer to you taking a handful of your hair to move away from your neck. He leans in to start kissing your neck. You jitter from the sudden touch of his hand. As he kisses your neck you step away from him. You could sense Peter was near.

“What’s wrong, princess? I was just kissing you.” He says deep in lust.

“Oh, I.. know it’s just, I’m really thirsty, would it be possible if you could get me a drink?” You ask hoping he would so you could catch your breath and talk to Peter.

“Okay, I’ll be back, don’t move.” He says as he makes his way back to the bar.

You exhale deeply and Peter appears almost out of nowhere.

“Y/N! I can’t believe that guy! I want to kill him, if we weren’t on a mission right now I would do it right now—“ Peter whispers loudly.

“Pete, I’m okay, he’s creepy, but harmless. I got so much intel for him. This plan is working well so far, I’m going to try for a little more, and then we’ll get out of here.” You say trying to reassure Peter, but also starting to blush at how much he really cared about you. Does he maybe like you back?

“You gotta go before he comes back.” You tell him almost shooing him away.

A few seconds pass and Dimitri appears with your drink just in time that Peter wasn’t stood beside you.

“Thanks.” You say taking a sip from the glass.

A few minutes pass and your head starts to spin. Your vision is blurry and and your eyelids feel heavy. You tried to remember what Steve said to alert him.

“My head hurts.” You say mumbling, losing control of your voice.

“You know, you really shouldn’t trust people you don’t know, Princess.” He says darkly. Why did he do this? Did he hear you and Peter?

You lose control of your body and start to tumble forward, but a pair of strong arms catches you before hitting the hard ground.

..........

You wake, arms and ankles tied in a dark concrete room. Where was this place? Am I still at the party? You ask yourself.

Moments later you hear footsteps approaching the door to your concrete room. You close your eyes hoping that whoever it was would think you’re still unconscious.

The footsteps approach closer and closer until they stop directly in front of you.

A hand hits you across the face, you shudder from it and find that it is none other than Dimitri.

“Hello, sweetheart.” He says with no recognizable tone in his voice. You almost revaluated if the man even was Dimitri.

“So, you think you would just stumble into my party hoping to steal all of our information? And by the way I know your fucking name isn’t Francesca Bianchi! Bianchi has no children!” He says now very angry at your attempt to deceive him earlier.

“I saw you arrive at the party with those two men, as soon as I saw that, I knew to pay attention to you. Women who show up with bodyguards aren’t good news around here.” He scolds you.

“Now, do you want to tell me who you and those men are? Or do you want me to beat it out of you?” He says bringing his face down to meet yours, taking your chin in his hand.

“Go fuck yourself!” You shout, heart racing at your courage.

Dimitri laughs and suddenly slaps you across the the face. You can feel blood starting to drip from your nose now.

“Talk like a bitch, get slapped around like a bitch!” He yells at you even angrier.

“Do something stupid like that again, I’ll have kill one of your boyfriends.” He says with a sharp tongue.

Did he actually have Peter and Steve captive? You couldn’t help thinking it was your fault, he must have heard you talking to Peter before he drugged you.

“No! Do whatever you want to me but don’t hurt them!” You yell back at him.

“Aw, does someone have a little soft spot for them? I’m thinking you like the little one. He was so bothersome, following us all night. I just couldn’t get you alone could I?” He says with an irritated tone.

“It’s too bad too, I was really starting to like you, you’re quite the flirt.” He says as he shifts closer to you. You try to move away from him but fail, he picks you up and takes you out of the concrete room.

You now find yourself in tied in a chair in a room with mob men. All of them look intimidating, these men were decorated in scars and appeared quite muscular.

“Now princess, I’m leaving you here to think about what you might want to tell me. I’m going to visit your little boyfriends, if you try anything stupid I’ll fucking kill you instantly.” He says sharply and disappears.

You were beyond scared, you didn’t think much of Dimitri when you met him. You just thought he was a rich kid who thought he was a top dog. But now being at his mercy you were so terrified. You were even more scared thinking about what awful things he could be doing to Steve and Peter.

“Steve!.... Steve, are you awake?” Peter asks quietly hoping that the cap was okay.

“Yeah... I’m fine, my head is spinning a bit.” Steve reassures Peter.

“We gotta get out of here, Y/N needs us, I hope she’s okay, I don’t know what I’d do if she was hurt.” Peter cries out.

“It’s okay Peter, relax, we’ll figure something out and we’ll get Y/N. Just let me think of something.” Steve says now thinking of an escape plan.

Peter struggles in his ropes and realizes his knots were not as tight as they should have been. “Hey, Cap? I think I can get out of my ties.”

“That’s great, looks like someone underestimated you.” Steve says struggling in his ties hoping his were loose also.

Peter got his wrists free and is now working on his ankle ties. As he finishes freeing himself, the door starts opening and Peter resumes to his position when tied.

“Boys, you’re awake now?” A dark voice emerges from the black doorway.

“Why are we here?” Steve boldly replies.

“To answer my questions, that little girl certainly had a lot for me tonight. Now, you have the option to answer and be good boys, or, you can dodge my questions and have her get beaten again. Your choice.” Dimitri says coldly.

“You won’t put your damn hands on her you piece of shit!!!” Peter says, now having a nerve struck after hearing that you have been beaten.

Dimitri laughs at Peter’s reaction, “And what? You think you’re going to do something about it? You’re just a kid, and you’re tied!”

“Am I?” Peter says pouncing onto Dimitri, punching him in the jaw.

“Poor choice little boy.” Dimitri says pulling out a knife.

Dimitri lunges towards Peter with his knife and tries slicing Peter’s arm. Peter dodges Dimitri and elbows Dimitri in the face. Dimitri stumbles behind Peter and takes the opportunity to stab Peter in the shoulder. Peter gasps and lands on a knee in front of Steve. He slowly pulls the knife out of his shoulder and drops it on the floor. This only sets more of a fight in Peter, Peter grapples Dimitri and pulls him to the ground. They both wrestle and each try to knock each other out.

As Peter and Dimitri fight, Steve is in arm’s reach of Dimitri’s knife and uses it to cut the ropes from his wrists. A few moments later Steve has now freed himself and helps Peter knock Dimitri out. Peter exhausted, can still only wonder if you were alright. He didn’t want to take a breath, he needed to save you.

“We have to find Y/N!” Peter tells Steve, now running out of the room.

“Peter hold on, we need to be careful, we don’t know what are doing with her. And what are we going to do with Dimitri? We can’t just leave him like this.” Steve warns Peter of his reckless behavior.

“Do you want me to finish him? Cause I’ll do it!” Peter says very dominantly.

“No! We can’t kill him! We need him for more information. We should tie him up and come back for him once we find Y/N.” Steve explains.

Steve and Peter tie Dimitri to a pipe, making it harder for him to remove himself if he were to wake up.

“We should split up, listen you can climb quietly along the walls and the ceilings and not be seen. I’ll go search areas around here.” Steve leads.

Before Steve could even finish his thought, Peter was already on the ceiling making his way to a room.

“And Peter, be careful!!” Steve’s voice echoes.

You were sitting in a chair with five mutants surrounding you in a circle. Your wrists were bruising from the restraints and they wouldn’t budge no matter how hard you tried.

“Stop struggling, sweetheart.” You hear one of them say. “We don’t want to hurt your beautiful face.”

“Why am I tied up when there’s five of you? Is Dimitri afraid I’ll overpower you.” You question.

The same man turns around and slaps you hard across the face. You cheek stung and became numb in a matter of seconds. What the hell? Why did he hit me?! You think to yourself.

“You don’t talk about Dimitri Toomes like that. Show some respect.” He says enraged.

You decided to push him some more. You didn’t know if it was out of pure courage or pure stupidity.

“Why the fuck would I respect him? He beat me!” You scream.

“That man is the son of Adrian Toomes, he’s among the strongest men in the city!” He defends.

“He’s a child, he’s not strong, I know plenty of stronger men and women than him!” You argue.

The man grows more annoyed and tired of your stubbornness. He pulled his arm back and whipped his hand hard across your face. Your cheek burned and you could taste blood on your tongue. You barely let out a whimper.

“You keep talking, and I’ll fucking end you right here.” He says very seriously.

As Peter is crawling along the walls and ceilings of the concrete hideout, he feels the hairs on his arms stand. His spider senses were going haywire. He sensed you nearby. He could hear muffled voices coming from a room ahead of him, he rushed to the doorway and listened for your voice but instead he only heard cries of pain from you. He crawled into the room and met eyes with you. You smile now knowing you were going to be okay. You wanted to help Peter have a better chance at freeing you. You needed to come up with a distraction and fast.

“Hey, do you hear that?” You say curiously.

“Hear what?”

“There! Did you hear it now? It was a loud slam! It sounds like it’s coming from outside of this room!” You say trying to sound as convincing as possible.

“You better not be lying, Dimitri will torture you and your friends even worse than you imagined.”

“Fine. Don’t believe me. Dimitri might be fighting off both of my friends right now.” You say coy.

The man scoffs and slowly leaves the room not breaking eye contact until he fully leaves. Another man follows for reassurance. Only three men remained in the room. Peter could handle them, these men were much scrawnier compared to the other two men.

Peter slowly crawls down the wall behind you and plans his attack. He looks over to you and makes a web shooting motion with his hand. You nodded, knowing exactly what his idea was.

Peter stuck his wrist out and shot webs at man leaving him stuck on the ground. The other two men were now aware of Peter’s presence and began attacking him.

Peter shoots his webs at one of the remaining men’s wrists, removing his knife. Peter then punches the man’s jaw and swings him down. The other man was more difficult to fight. He was much stronger than Peter anticipated.

Peter swung his fist to make contact with man, the man dodges and makes a quick hit to Peter’s ribs. You could see the pain oozing from his face. You cried for Peter, wanting him to be okay.

“It’s okay, Y/N.” Peter says staggering in his place trying to get his momentum back. Peter tried to take another swing and hits the man in the cheek. The man is slightly fazed, but kicks Peter off his feet. The man puts Peter in a chokehold. You yell at the man to stop.

“You want me to stop? I don’t know, I think loverboy could take some more.” The man taunts.

As the man taunts you, Peter loosens the man’s grip from his neck. “It’s going to take a lot more for you to take me down that easily.” Peter huskily replies to the man.

Peter then elbows the man in the ribs, knocking the wind right out of him. Peter removes himself from him and reverses the positions between them. He then grabs the man’s collar and punches the man hard, knocking him out.

Peter steps back still looking at the man. He is breathing hard. You look Peter over, glancing at all of his wounds. His neck was already bruising, his fists were bloody, his clothes were ripped and bloodied, his jaw was bruised. You also notice a large stab wound in his shoulder. When did he get that?! Peter was a mess and you blamed it on yourself.

“Peter... you’re hurt.” You say with tears in your eyes.

“Y/N, I’m okay, please don’t cry.” He says as he quickly makes his way to you.

You could see him breathing deep and hunch in pain when he makes certain movements.

“No, you’re not Peter. Every time you move I can see it hurts you. You were also stabbed, how long ago did that happen? This is all my fault, if I had been better at lying and not trusting Dimitri none of this would have happened.”

“Y/N this is not your fault at all! Please don’t blame yourself for this. Dimitri tried to fight me and he ended up stabbing me. You don’t have to worry about him, he’s not going to hurt you again. We’re okay, and we’re gonna get out of here.” He says now untying you from your chair.

“I put you into a situation where you got hurt, I couldn’t bare to watch that asshole choke you. I don’t know what I would’ve done if he actually killed you.” You say now sobbing thinking of what the outcome could’ve been.

“He didn’t, you’ve still got me. I would’ve chosen for him to take me down over you getting hurt.” He says comforting.

“I really don’t know what I would’ve done if one of those assholes had you like that. I could hear you crying. That’s how I found you. They’re lucky I didn’t kill them.” He says now getting very tense. You could feel it, being the only one with him.

“Peter?” You say interrupting him.

“Yeah Y/N?

You lean in wrapping your arms around his neck gently to kiss him. He takes control fast and kisses you deeply and sweetly.

“I’ve been wanting to do that since I walked down the stairs back at the compound.” You admit aloud.

“I’ve been wanting to do that since I met you, I just never knew how to tell you and I thought you only liked me as a friend.” Peter says now very shyly.

“And, you kinda took my breath away when you came down the stairs in that dress. You know blue is my favourite colour.” Peter admits.

You cut him off and kiss him again, reassuringly.

“I know! I picked that dress out of Nat’s options for you. I’ve had a crush on you for a long time, Pete.” You confess.

Just as you were leaning in again. Your dad busts the door in finding the both of you in an embrace.

“Y/N! ARE YOU OKAY! THANK GOD I FOUND YOU TWO!” Tony says very relieved.

Steve, Nat, Bruce, and Bucky enter behind and relax finding the both of you safe. Once Steve and Bruce see that you’re both okay, they breakaway from the group to find Dimitri to bring back for questioning.

“Dad! We’re okay! How did you find us?” You say beaming.

“I put a tracker on your bracelet so we could locate you in case of an emergency.” Tony says.

“Wait, I’ve had this bracelet for over a year now. You did just put a tracker on it now right?” You say suspicious.

“...”

“DAD! There’s a thing called privacy! You can’t stalk my every move!!..” As you get mad you slowly realize if it weren’t for your irratic father, you may never have escaped.

“Thanks, dad.” You say running up to him hugging him tightly.

He squeezes back, then realizes who you were hugging moments before when he broke the door down.

“Hey Peter, do you want to explain to me why you were hugging my daughter?” He says protectively.

“Dad! Stop! He saved me, if it weren’t for Pete I wouldn’t have made it.” You say defending Peter.

“And, I love him.”

“Ok.... And we will have a discussion about this later young lady. I don’t like the idea of you using the L word.” He says now leading the way out of the room.

The Avengers follow Tony, you and Peter are left alone for a moment in the room again.

“Thanks for defending me, Y/N. Did you mean that also?” He says softly.

“Yeah I did.” You say placing your hand in his.

You both follow along still hand in hand. “Also, my dad will get over us liking each other. He tells me how great of a guy you are all the time.” You chirp.

“What if he doesn’t? I don’t think he’d think I’m a great guy if I’m dating his daughter.” Peter says slightly concerned.

“Then it’ll be our little secret.” You say whispering to him.

“That’s a secret I could keep.” Peter says now smiling looking back at you.

[gubler-me-up]

Perfectionism

Request: HELLOO, I’ve had an idea for literally months in my head but I wouldn’t be able to write it as good as you 🥺 Would you mind doing a Spencer reaction to his crush having bad body dysmorphia that they’ve been hiding from the team (they’re working for bau) but at a case or smn someone they’re interviewing comments negatively on their body and they break down once they think they’re alone? But Spence sees and reaches out and it’s really wholesome and soft? I’m a sucker for angsty fluff I’m sorry 😔

A/N: Thanks for the prompt anon, much appreciated! I hope this does justice to your well thought-out idea. I hope it satisfies all your angsty fluff needs! Side note, to everyone of my followers/readers I hope you know you’re beautiful and finding love/happiness within yourself takes time, but trust the process, loves ❤️ Enjoy! 

Category: Angsty fluff

Content warning: Swearing, mention of violence, self degradation

Word count: 2.3k

---------------

You stood in front of the mirror inside the police department’s washroom. You finished applying another thick layer of foundation on your face. You knew applying this much makeup to your face wasn’t good. Your dermatologist even recommended against it and advised you to let your skin breathe for a while to prevent over clogging your pores. He didn’t understand the problem of doing that though.

Without the concealer masking the dark circles under your eyes, you’d probably look dead. Maybe even worse. Without the foundation, your acne and healing acne scars would definitely bring unwanted attention to your face. It was certain to happen.

You had to wear them all the time, especially at work. You thought of how JJ probably never had to go through this. Her face was free of any sort of marks or blemishes. She always looked alive with her bright blue eyes with no heavy bags insight. No wonder Spencer had a crush on her a few years back.

Your thoughts were interrupted by the vibrations of your phone on the bathroom counter. You looked down to see Spencer’s name pop up informing you it was time to interview the suspect. A sigh left your mouth as you started packing up your products into your travel beauty kit.

As you walked out of the door, you noticed Spencer at the end of the poorly lit hall leading back out to the main lobby. When he noticed you were walking down the hall towards him, he smiled and waved. Sometimes you thought he was the cutest genius in the world.

“Hey, didn’t know you were waiting for me,” you said.

He shrugged. “Thought it would be nice for us to walk to the interview room together.”

You raised an eyebrow. “Oh?”

He nodded as you both started walking towards the interview room. You couldn’t help noticing he kept on looking at you. Especially your face. What if he saw your acne scars? Or even the acne itself? What if he was just noticing how strange your face looked?

You stopped walking. “Why do you keep staring at me?”

He stopped walking as well as he gave you a questionable look. “What?”

“Is there a reason you keep looking at my face?” You asked.

He shook his head. “No, no reason, I just-”

“You just what?” You said before he even finished his sentence.

Spencer was taken back by your tone. Your words made it seem as if he was attacking you. You could tell from his confused facial expression. Before he could get a chance to pull his words together, you started walking again.

“Forget it. Let’s just focus on this interview.”

Spencer watched as you walked by him. He trailed behind you, trying his best not to say anything else. You knew you shouldn’t have snapped at him the way you did, but you couldn’t bear the possibility of him pointing out a flaw. You just knew he could see everything you tried so hard to hide.

As you two reached the interview room door you felt Spencer gently grab your arm. You turned to him to see how concerned he looked. Before you said anything he made sure to get the first few words out.

“Y/N, I’m sorry if I made you feel uncomfortable back there. Whatever’s troubling you I’m here to help you get through it,” he assured you.

You smiled. “Thanks. I appreciate you, Spence. For now, let’s put what happened behind us for now and go interview this guy.”

Reid smiled as he gently squeezed your arm before letting you go. It felt nice having him reassure you, but he didn’t even know what he was reassuring you about. Maybe he didn’t notice your facial imperfections at all. Maybe he was genuinely admiring your face.

You opened up the interview room to see a dark-haired, middle-aged, white man sitting across the table. He was well put together with a buttoned-up blue shirt, black tie and his hair was slicked back. Physically he matched the profile perfectly. He looked as if he exuded arrogance as your profile detected the unsure would be like. He tried to keep a cool and emotionless demeanour, but by his furrowed eyebrows and wrinkling forehead, he was becoming impatient.

“Hello, I’m agent Y/N Y/L/N and this is Dr. Spencer Reid. Adam Boyer, correct?” You said as you and Spencer took your seats.

“Glad you can read documents, agent,” he scoffed.

“I wouldn’t get so smart-mouthed yet, Boyer. According to some sketchy transactions between you, John McNeil and Robert Morrison it seems as if you have a lot to hide for someone so vocal,” you said.

He squinted his eyes at you. “What does this even have to do with anything?”

“I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but those two men are dead. You were the last person to contact both of them the day they died. A transaction of over half a million dollars goes missing and you get mad and-“

“I don’t know what you’re trying to imply, agent, but I didn’t murder my colleagues over money. My company makes more than that in a day, so spare me of your pathetic accusations.”

Before you could reply, Spencer jumped in to level out the tension between you and Boyer. He opened a file on the desk and pointed to a bank statement.

“It says here on your financial records your company is $1.5 million dollars in debt. We discovered Robert Morrison and John McNeil both gave you back their shares of the company to equate $500,000, which is legally a breach in the company’s contract for workers, including yourself, to share, distribute or give away company shares without a reasonable cause. According to the list of reasonable cause you failed to mention bankruptcy or were too arrogant at the time to force something like that happening to you,” Spencer said.

With everything he said, you could tell Boyer’s cool exterior was wearing off. He looked glossier in the face, started fidgeting with his tie and refused to look directly at Spencer. He decided to direct his attention to you instead.

“Well, isn’t that a huge mistake on my part, ain’t it?” He asked directly to you.

“Huge mistake or huge flaw in your plan of getting away with murdering your colleagues? I think it’s the second one, Boyer,” you said.

He leaned back in his chair without breaking any eye contact with you. He folded his hand in front of his chest. You had to admit he made your feel a bit uncomfortable.

“What else do you think?” He asked.

“I think you murdered your colleagues when they found out you had taken back their share of the company to pay back your debts. They would have ratted you out, got you fired from your own company or even worse, the whole company would have shut down and you’d have nothing left.”

“Nothing left,” Boyer said seemingly to himself.

“Yes, absolutely nothing. Your wife divorced you, took full custody of your two boys and now you spend your days throwing your money-approximately $1.5 million dollars-on trying to buy love from escorts,” you said.

It was as if something had woken up inside of him as he almost pounced across the table. Both you and Spencer got out of your seats with Spencer using his arm to block the front of you. It was as if it was a natural instinct for him to protect you before bracing himself.

“Sit down,” Spencer demanded.

“At least I have escorts willing to ride my dick. You couldn’t even pay a male stripper to look at that face of yours. Where’s the pretty agent who was in here before? If I’m going to be accused of a crime, I’d rather be accused by someone half decent looking. Get my fucking lawyer on the phone,” he proceeded to yell.

Though you shouldn’t have felt as bad as you did by the words he said, you did. The blunt force in his voice was vicious. The way he looked at you in disgust. His disgust was too real. He was bold enough to look at you the way everyone wanted to, but was too cautious to do it in front of your face.

“I’ll get your lawyer on the phone, you psycho,” you whispered before turning around to leave.

“Don’t forget to bring the real eye candy in as well, sweetheart,” he said.

You didn’t bother looking back at him or even Spencer. You felt your eyes get heavy with tears and knew it would be terrible to show weakness to such a vile suspect. You rushed out of the room before Spencer could stop you or even follow you close behind.

You rushed towards the washroom as your tears were at the brim of your eyes. As you reached the door, you paused. What if someone was in there? What if Emily or JJ saw you crying? You retracted your steps and decided to go to the family washroom instead.

You didn’t even wait until the door was fully closed before letting out your tears. You heavily wept to yourself as you replayed everything he had said to you. Spencer probably stood there agreeing with everything he said, word for word. Your face being hideous, JJ’s beauty surpassing the little you had, no one wanting you. You backed up against the wall to avoid the mirror, to avoid the disgusting reflection in the mirror.

The only reason you looked up was that you heard the washroom door open. You saw Spencer peak in. When he saw the tears running down your face, he didn’t hesitate to go over to you with concern written all over his face.

“Y/N, what’s wrong? I hope he didn’t get to you,” he said as he reached out his hands.

You assumed he was going to try to wipe the tears from your face, so you pushed away his hands. You couldn’t stand the thought of him touching your face if he thought it was hideous. You didn’t even want him looking at you directly. You looked down to avoid your face being in the presence of his.

He attempted to lift your head up by placing his hand on your chin. You flinched at his touch and moved your head out of his grasp. New tears started to spill from your eyes as you looked at him with despair.

“Can you stop, Spencer?” You wept.

He looked at you confused. “Stop what?”

“Looking at me. I know my face is ugly, okay? Everyone knows and it’s just degrading for you to pretend not to notice,” you snapped at him.

“Y/N, what are you talking about? There’s nothing wrong with your face.”

“Spencer, I know you see it. My acne and acne scars. It doesn’t help that my face is always shiny and my cheeks are chubby. You don’t have to pretend to be blind to it for the sake of my feelings.”

“You thought I was looking at you earlier because you think I think you’re ugly? Y/N that couldn’t be further from the truth.”

You rolled your eyes. “Then why were you looking at me? Be honest.”

“Because I think you’re gorgeous.”

“Ugh, Spencer, you don-”

He grabbed both your hands in his big ones, grasping them tightly. You looked down at your hands in his and then looked up into his eyes. He looked longingly at you. You could see the genuine look of love in his face.

“Y/N, I know what you’re going through. Body dysmorphia’s not an easy thing to fight off by yourself, but I want to assure you every day that I think you’re the most beautiful person I know; both inside and out.”

You let out a deep breath as you felt round three of tears coming to your eyes. Honestly, you couldn’t think of a moment you felt genuinely pretty. His words could move mountains.

“But if Adam Boyer could-”

“Please don’t let a psychopath make you feel unsure of yourself. He only belittled you because he lost control of the situation and decided to target you. His idea of a perfect girl is someone he can dominate, which makes him disgusting not you.”

He let go of your right hand as he wiped away a tear making its way down your face. You grasped his left hand hard as he touched your face. It still made you feel uncomfortable, but you were happy Spencer cared deeply for you.

“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have touched your face if you’re not comfortable with that yet. I know it takes time to breakdown this idea of what perfect is especially with so many beauty standards being pushed by society, but I’ll be here to help you realize you’re the most beautiful you. I wouldn’t want you to be any other way,” he said.

You smiled at his words as you wiped away the few stray tears running down your face. You had to admit you liked it better when he did it. You leaned your head back, took a deep breath, let it out and then looked at Spencer.

“Thank you for being you. I wouldn’t want you to be any other way as well,” you said.

He smiled. “I’ll always be here for you, Y/N. If you want me to be that is.”

“I do. I really do.”

“Maybe after we’re done with this case we can do something together to help you remember the beautiful person you are.”

“I’d love that.”

You both walked towards the washroom door. Spencer made sure not to let go of your hand until you two left the washroom. You felt as if he wanted you to grasp onto the positive energy he had for you. You felt uplifted in a way. This must be the benefit of the Spencer Reid effect.

—–

MASTERLIST

[attack-on-kiwi]

Hi! I really enjoy your writing and your characterization. Could I please request the rest of the fluff alphabet for post-timeskip Reiner? (whichever point is easiest for you to write from)

Check my master list for letters F, H, N, & R!

A ctivities - What do they like to do with their s/o? How do they spend their free time with them?

There isn’t much Reiner genuinely likes doing. He’s more than happy to just take part in whatever activities his s/o wants to do. At this point he doesn’t feel like he’s allowed to have an opinion or have any strong wants. This does bother his s/o, so they need to try and coax an answer from him.

They find out he enjoys going for walks. Reiner specifically likes going on long hikes where no other people are around. Sure, he enjoys walking around the marketplace, but there’s always a pressure that he’s going to be cut down at any given moment. Therefore, private hikes are more his scene. He’s able to relax and will be more willing to open up to his s/o during these hikes. 

If he had to pick another activity, it would be training together. He’d want to do something physical, such as sparring because it gives him an easy and familiar way to tease them in a more lighthearted manner, such as play wrestling. It’s one of the few times his s/o gets to see Reiner act his age and not put up walls. 

B eauty - What do they admire about their s/o? What do they think is beautiful about them?

Resilience. The fact that his s/o is able to push through being with someone like him and still see the good in this terrible world has him weak. He feels undeserving of someone so good, but he’s too attached to even consider letting them go. 

To Reiner, their laugh is the most reassuring and calming sound. No matter if their laugh is a gentle chime or a crashing wave, he can’t get enough of it. He swears to himself whenever he makes them laugh, he falls more deeply in love with them than he thought could be possible. 

C omfort - How would they help their s/o when they feel down/have a panic attack etc.?

Reiner wouldn’t really know where to start. His mind is racing with thoughts such as “Is there an attack?” and “Did they get hurt?”. He lacks tact when calming them down, gripping their shoulders and forcing them to look at him as he near demands them to spill what’s going on. When that doesn’t work, he tries to rethink his approach. He’ll breathe and calm himself before smoothing his palms over their arms and gently asking them what’s wrong. 

He’ll hug them tightly and wait as they relax. Whether they just cling to him until their breathing calms or they ride out their panic, he’s pressed his lips to the top of their head, mumbling “everything is fine” even if he doesn’t believe it himself.

D reams - How do they picture their future with their s/o?

Reiner, like other warriors, doesn’t entertain the idea of having a future. This man has already resigned himself to the idea that he will be dead within a few years, so what is the point of him imagining a future? 

If he could have his way, he’d want a family. At least one child. Though, he wonders if his child would need a friend since he has no siblings that could provide cousins. Maybe two children, then, so they don’t get lonely. He thinks about how he wants a small, comfortable home away from the bustling of the towns. The seaside sounds ideal. Sometimes he imagines what it would feel like to have those children tucked between him and his partner while he told them exaggerated stories of the animals that lived in the forests. 

E qual - Are they the dominant one in the relationship, or rather passive?

He’s physically dominant when it comes to most situation. He’ll put himself before his s/o and make sure they are always in his view. When it comes to intimacy, he teeters between being timid and overbearing. It’s difficult for him to find a balance between wanting to be careful and wanting to have his s/o to himself, and they often find him coming on too strong then becoming reclusive for a few moments after due to the fear of having possibly crosses a boundary. 

Reiner sees himself as a natural guardian, so it’s only to be expected that he takes on more traditionally protective roles.

G ratitude - How grateful are they in general? Are they aware of what their s/o is doing for them?

Reiner is extremely touched that his s/o would stay with a coward such as himself. He thanks them often and brings them gifts. Most of the time it’s food that would otherwise be difficult for them to get their hands on. 

He has a hard time getting out of his head but is able to see that his work and attitude does affect his s/o to a degree and tries to be as mindful as possible. Most times, this mindfulness is chalked up to a simple, “I don’t know what I’d do without you” which needs to be interpreted depending on the context of the situation and his emotional state.

I nspiration - Did their s/o change them somehow, or the other way around? Like trying out new things or helped them overcome personal problems?

His s/o grounds him, but they haven’t made huge steps in affecting his personality. He is lost and needs to figure out how to depend on others, and unfortunately, he’s unable to do so credibly at the moment. His s/o hopes Reiner will one day be able to share his burdens with them, even if just a little bit. Reiner definitely teaches them to be patient. 

On the other hand, Reiner is happy to help them overcome their fears. He’s always got a solution and steps to help them get to their goals.

J ealousy - Do they get jealous easily? How do they deal with it?

Yes. He’s insecure and is easily provoked by other people giving his s/o attention. If he sees them giving others intimate attention, he will become extremely suspicious and angry. Reiner tries to ignore it since he doesn’t want to cause a scene. Image is important to warriors, after all. He does cling to them more as he tries to calm himself, often holding their hands or hugging them close in private.

If he’s in a situation where he is allowed to make a move, he’s more than willing to use physical force to scare off anyone he sees as trying to get with his s/o.

K iss - Are they a good kisser? What was the first kiss like?

Reiner’s a good kisser when it comes down to it. His kisses are hot and nearly suffocating. He always has a strong hand behind his partner’s head and another firmly on their back pressing them into him as deep as he can. His skin is warm and being so close to him increases that heat. 

His first kiss with his partner was desperate. Whether it was during an episode back in Paradis or when he got back home, his s/o found him uncharacteristically quiet. Serious. 

Their voice surprised him, causing him to jump as they made their presence known. It was an unusual sight- to see Reiner hunched in on himself. When they got close enough to sit next to him and ask what was going on, he simply told them that he wanted to kiss them at least once since he didn’t know if he’d ever be able to again. After their initial shock, his soon to be s/o agreed, letting him take lead. Reiner licked his lips and placed one hand gently behind their neck while the other rested on their thigh. He leaned ver, finally inviting them to his lips and as the two sought one another’s touch, he found himself pinning them down and nearly unclothing them. Whether his s/o allowed it to continue or stopped is up for debate.

L ove Confession - How would they confess to their s/o?

Reiner would never consider confessing.

He would need to be near death or in an extremely stressful and dire situation to blurt it out. 

That, or during more recent manga events, Reiner would try to find a moment of peace where he and his s/o could speak in private. During a conversation where he finally explains his past, he would likely refuse to make eye contact and stare at their feet. His voice is shaking slightly as he steels himself for whatever the outcome may be. It’s his s/o who turns his cheek to look him in the eye, confessing they are in love with him. It’s overwhelming and as he’s embraced by them, he reciprocates it over and over in shaky whispers that are muffled by their neck. 

M arriage - Do they want to get married? How do they propose? What would the marriage be like?

He likes the idea of marriage. Being with someone who is completely his and building a life together that’s peaceful and without pressure would mean the world to him. 

Reiner’s proposal is private. It would be during camp before the climatic battle. One evening, he’d take his s/o to a private area and reminisce their experiences together. He’s unsure why he’s bringing it up until his s/o asks what he wants to do after they win. He’s taken aback, wanting to say there’s not much left for him once the world is saved. “Will you marry me, Reiner?”

Reiner’s heart stops at that moment. It’s not a proposal, more so it’s just gauging his desires. He can’t help but nod. If they survive, even if he has little time left, he wants to spend it with them.

O n Cloud Nine - What are they like when they are in love? Is it obvious for others? How do they express their feelings?

Reiner’s love is subtle. It’s not common for people in Marley to outright be romantic in public, so displays are limited. Though at some point when he was younger he would have taken great pride in being overly affectionate in front of others, he now takes solace in being a quiet and helpful lover. It’s difficult for him to really express his love verbally, so he takes action. He’s good with fixing appliances, running errands, and comforting them in private. To most others, it seems Reiner is distant with his s.o, but this is untrue.

He’s skilled in loving them. His holds are firm and comforting. His kisses are deep and true. His actions express his care more accurately than his words ever could. The way he puts himself before them is in itself his ultimate display of love. 

P DA - Are they upfront about their relationship? Do they brag with their s/o in front of others? Or are they rather shy to kiss etc. when others are watching?

Reiner prefers to keep his romantic involvement private due to fear for his s/o’s safety. Being Involved with him makes them a target which is something he’s unwilling to look past. This does not mean he is ashamed of them by any means. 

Q uirk - Some random ability they have that’s beneficial in a relationship.

His hugs are all consuming. Something about being in his embrace helps wash away all anxiety. It’s truly difficult for his s/o to be upset for long when they’re in his hold. This becomes especially useful during high stress events, and it helps Reiner calm down.  

S upport - Are they helping their s/o achieve their goals? Do they believe in them?

Reiner’s focus isn’t on helping his s/o achieve any goals. His fixation is his mission to save humanity, so he doesn’t actually think too much about if his s/o has any goals they wan to achieve.

If his s/o shares a desire with him, he’s happy to help them map out a plan of attack. There’s not much he can do in ways of helping them if it doesn’t pertain to training or military affairs since most of his time is dedicated to his work. 

T hrill - Do they need to try out new things to spice out your relationship? Or do they prefer a certain routine?

Reiner prefers having a routine above all else. With how erratic his life is, a sense of peace is important to him. He suffers from PTSD and anxiety among other issues, so knowing where his s/o is during a certain time or having a specific ritual at a certain time every day helps him ground himself. He wouldn’t want to deal with any destructive routines when he has free time. It’s extremely important for him to focus on his healing, so a routine is best.

U nderstanding - How good do they know their partner? Are they empathetic?

Reiner... does not know his s/o well. He knows what bothers them and knows about them from what they share. However, he doesn’t make an effort to learn more. He’s got too much on his plate, and the relationship is reliant on the physical intimacy to help each other blow off steam. He could stand to be more emotionally present. It’s something he’s aware of and feels like it’s too late to do anything about it. If he survives, he wants to build a stronger relationship where the two can equally rely on one another for the support that they need.

He’s empathetic to a degree. He listens to their problems and tries to offer the best support he can, but he’s not necessarily equipped to help someone deal with their own problems when he barely has a handle on his own shaky mental state.

V alue - How important is the relationship to them? What is it’s worth in comparison to other things in their life?

Reiner is ridiculously obsessed with keeping his relationship. He knows he’s not the best partner that he could be, but he wants to selfishly keep his s/o because they make him feel human. They make him feel worthy of being alive, and he’s too scared of letting that go for who would he be without a purpose? His mission does come first, but he’d be more than willing to throw himself in front of his s/o if it meant securing their escape. 

He’s a natural protector as mentioned before, and couple that with suicidal tendencies and you have someone that’s problematically self-sacrificial. It’s not a good mixture, but it goes to show how dependent he is on his s/o for a sense of stability and how far he’d go to make sure they were safe. 

W ild Card - A random Fluff Headcanon.

He likes lying face to face when the two are in bed. When Reiner is especially tired, his cheeks and nose flush  a dark pink. It’s always embarrassing when his s/o decides to tease him about it. Don’t you dare call him cute or coo at him because in his tired state he will have no methods of coping. He might even turn around to try and escape their compliments, but if they cling to his back and try to pull him back around, they’re somehow always successful. 

X OXO - Are they very affectionate? Do they love to kiss and cuddle?

Reiner doesn’t kiss often. He does like to hold his s/o’s hands. Clasping their fingers with his own and holding their hand sto his chest in moments of quiet vulnerability will be the most stripped down, vulnerable acts he will ever commit. 

He’s not opposed to his partner kissing him and holding him, he just doesn’t feel worthy of starting the act himself. Once they initiate, he’s more than eager to soak up as much touch as he can. He never wants to let go, meaning they can be in one another’s embrace for hours if they’re lucky.

Y earning - How will they cope when they’re missing their partner?

Reiner is good at compartmentalizing his feelings, so he will run on autopilot and just hope that his s/o is alive so he can see them soon.

Z eal - Are they willing to go to great lengths for the relationship? If so, what kind of?

As mentioned earlier, Reiner is more than willing to put his life on the line for his s/o. He would run into a head on attack if it meant giving his loved one a moment longer to breathe. 

[beneathstarryskies]

Could I request a fluff alphabet for young and older Johnny Lawrence?

Thank you so much for the request! I’m sorry it took me so damn long! ❤️

Answers for older/current Johnny are in italics!

A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)

    Johnny is pretty affectionate, but there are two sides to him. On one hand, he tends to seem more possessive in public. Always has an arm around your shoulders or waist, and makes it a point to kiss you in front of people so they know who you belong to. It takes him some time to show you the more tender side of himself, and it is truly reserved just for you. He likes to pepper soft kisses on your face, and whispers about how beautiful he thinks you are. He tends to shy away a bit from receiving the same amount of affection though, thinking it makes him look weak.

    Having faced a great deal of rejection and heartache, he is really slow with showing affection. It takes him a while to even admit he has feelings for you, and then from there even longer for him to act on it. However, the possessive nature of his youth has faded into a need to just be loved. He’s more open now to letting himself just sink into your touch. He loves it when you play with his hair and kiss his nose. In return he’ll shower you with compliments, and kisses you every chance he gets. He proudly holds your hand everywhere you go.

B = Best friend (What would they be like as a best friend? How would the friendship start?)

Most of Johnny’s friends at this point are connected to Cobra Kai, so chances are if you weren’t in Cobra Kai there probably isn’t much of a friendship. However, he might just “accidentally” become best friends with you after being forced to work on an assignment together. He’d expect you to do all the work, but after realizing you won’t stand for that he begrudgingly works with you on it. An unexpected friendship blossoms.

    At this point his friends are his family. So he is fiercely protective and loyal. However, he’s not much for emotional support because he just doesn’t know how. He’s been taught to more or less repress it, so that tends to be his offered solution. His attitude can sometimes be a bit flippant.

    Probably met at the bar, maybe you were a bartender or something. Most likely he’d deny you were his best friend because of the whole “I don’t need anyone” attitude. However, if you needed him he’d drop everything to be there and he knows you’d do the same for him. He’s still not great at emotional support, but he does try at least. Or rather he tries to keep you distracted from whatever emotional thing is bothering you, because that’s truly the only way he knows how to deal with emotions.

C = Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)

He loves to cuddle, but good luck getting him to admit it. You usually have to initiate it, but you will have to deal with him pretending he’s only doing it to make you happy. His favorite thing is when you fall asleep with your head on his chest, and he can just play with your hair while listening to your steady breathing. It’s in these moments that he truly experiences peace. That is until you wake up and he has to pretend he didn’t like it.

He loves to cuddle, and he’s really not afraid to admit it anymore. He just wants to hold you and be held by you. Closeness is what he’s been craving his whole life, and he’s just really tired of pretending it’s not. He’s tried getting through life on his own, and he hated it. He just wants to come home and curl up with you after a long day. He wants to snuggle against you while you twirl his locks between your fingers.

D = Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?)

It’s definitely in the cards to settle down one day, but he’s not particularly in a hurry about it. He’d assumed he would end up settling down with Ali, but since that didn’t go the way he planned he’s a bit unsure of where he’ll end up. There’s a whole big world out there, and he thinks it’s his for the taking, so why worry? He’s a bit useless when it comes to cooking and cleaning. Honestly, he doesn’t even try. Pretty much a typical teenager in that regard.

He’d be open to settling down, although more it feels out of reach to him at this point. It’s certainly something he is a bit afraid of, having already failed at the task. Johnny would have to feel completely secure and confident in a relationship before he’d consider marriage. He’s still somewhat useless at cooking and cleaning, but he is willing to give it more of an honest effort.

E = Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

He might be a little bit cold about it, since at this point he’s fully immersed in the “no mercy” teachings of Kreese. Once he’s decided it’s over, he just tells you as such. He doesn’t really provide any explanations, and if he cares at all he doesn’t show it.

    He’s terrible at break ups. Especially since for him to be in a relationship at all takes a bit of time, and he’s found it’s not easy for him to just carelessly break hearts anymore. That being said, he will be an accidental asshole in the process. It’d take a lot of effort for him to build up the confidence, and then he just goes for it like ripping off a bandaid.

F = Fiance(e) (How do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?)

    After Ali, he becomes pretty commitment phobic. He tries to form meaningful relationships, but always pushes people away when they get too close. He’s just not sure if he can ever open himself up again.  If he wants to get married at all, it would take a long time. Most likely, he has no real interest in it.

Pretty much the same, although as he’s gotten older he’s opened up more to the idea of getting married. He likes the idea of having a partner to get through this life with. Someone to always have his back, and for him to support as well. While he doesn’t feel marriage is necessarily a required commitment, he’d be more open to it if you wanted to get married.

G = Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)

Gentle is not a word you could use to describe Johnny Lawrence at any age. Emotionally he is about as gentle as a hammer to the head. He just doesn’t understand at all. Occasionally he may muster up some gentleness, but it’s very rare since he associates it with weakness. 

Physically, he’s generally not gentle. He likes to pick you up and spin you around. Sometimes even enjoying to play fight a bit. However, sometimes he can surprise you with little spells of gentleness. Especially if something has happened to make him worry about losing you.

The above is the answer for Johnny of all ages, except he no longer thinks of having gentle emotions as as weakness. 

H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?)

Johnny loves hugs and will hug you all the time if he can. He’s very handsy with it, often cupping your butt while he hugs you-if you’re okay with that kind of thing of course- and will often sneak a kiss on your cheek.

He still loves hugging and he still tends to get a bit cheeky with it. One difference is that he takes more time to savor the moment; feeling your heartbeat and really breathing you in. Usually he holds you for as long as you’ll let him, insisting on a kiss before he’ll release you.

I = I love you (How fast do they say the L-word?)

He doesn’t. It’s not something he’s super comfortable with, but he will express it in other ways. Usually by reminding you to be safe when you leave him and wanting you to call him when you get home so he knows you made it safely. He’ll also do little thoughtful things like bring you coffee or remind you to eat if he thinks you’re not taking care of yourself. There’s a nurturing side to Johnny he often hides, but he’ll open up a bit to show you how much he cares.

Like his younger self Johnny tends to take to being somewhat nurturing in order to express his feelings for you. Once he gets a cell phone, he even takes to texting you throughout the day to tell you he’s thinking about you. He tries to make sure you know he loves you and you’re on his mind. He will eventually say the words. It just takes him a very long time to come around to it.

J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?)

Oh boy, is he ever jealous. Seeing someone else flirt with you drives him crazy, and he has gotten into many fights over it. He’ll jump right in between you, ready to fight before you’ve even had a chance to handle the situation yourself. If you express disliking this behavior, he will attempt to hold back. It’s still written all over his face, and sometimes it can lead him to making accusations.

There’s still some jealousy, but he’s less likely to jump in unless someone is being particularly pushy after you’ve expressed disinterest. One thing he no longer does is accuse you of flirting/cheating. He wouldn’t be with you if he didn’t trust you, and he wants you to know that.

K = Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)

He’s surprisingly tender with his kisses. Early on in your relationship, it’s the one tell of how insecure he feels deep down. Often times not deepening the kiss until you’ve given some indication you want him to. He likes giving kisses on your cheeks and neck. He really likes when you kiss his forehead, although he’s a little sheepish with admitting this. He also likes it when you kiss his neck and shoulders.

He’s tender and takes his time teasing out reactions from you. Overall he’s more confident in his abilities, which just came naturally with age and experience. He still is prone to giving cheek and neck kisses, and really enjoys that. However, he’s also learned that he likes the way you react when he kisses you behind the ear. His own favorite places to get kissed haven’t changed.

L = Little ones (How are they around children?)

Terrible, and no interest in getting better.

Slightly better and more willing to learn. He’s still pretty useless with any kid under the age of about 10. And really the only way he knows to relate is through karate.

M = Morning (How are mornings spent with them?)

He’s usually up somewhat early to go train or work out. So if you don’t want to do those things, he’s usually not around much in the mornings. However, he will come in all sweaty and give you a kiss before raising his arm up with a smirk and teasing you about smelling how sweaty he is. Usually resulting in you rolling your eyes and saying, “I smelled you as soon as you walked in the room.”

Mornings now are more laid back. Usually there’s about an hour of cuddling and complaining about having to get up before you finally drag him out of bed. Then one of you cooks breakfast while the other makes coffee and pours cups for you both. You eat breakfast together and talk about what you’re each planning for the day before getting started. Johnny is always running a bit behind schedule. It never stops him from kissing you a dozen times before leaving the apartment.

N = Night (How are nights spent with them?)

The average night contains lots of making out, brief intermission of a random activity, then probably more making out. Occasionally you guys go out to parties with friends. Johnny likes spending quality time with you. So more often than not you end up doing something just the two of you. He likes to take you out riding, usually ending up at the beach.

At least once a week you guys go out to have drinks, but usually he prefers low-key nights in. There’s still usually lots of making out and cuddling, but usually it’s on the couch while a movie plays in the background. You might have a drink to unwind, and talk a bit about your days.

O = Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?)

The thing about Johnny at both ages though is that he actually wears his heart on his sleeve way more than he realizes. If you asked him he’d probably say he’s the strong silent type. He takes a long time to purposely reveal his feelings. However, considering how much his feelings show through his actions and demeanor, you’re definitely already aware of his insecurity. You just pretend you haven’t already caught on, because you don’t want him to retreat again. Him actually opening up is much better than having to infer it, and he’ll begin to work through why he feels the way he does deep down.

The answer is the same for adult Johnny.

P = Patience (How easily angered are they?)

There is no patience in Johnny at all. He is very hotheaded and quick to anger. It’s probably the biggest issue in your relationship. Truthfully it’s his biggest issue in general.

He is still pretty quick to anger but much better at controlling it-especially with you. He gets hotheaded and acts stupid, but it takes a bit longer for him to get to that point. It is still a big problem he’s having to work on. Johnny is slowly starting to realize he can’t punch or kick his way through every problem.

Q = Quizzes (How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?)

Johnny remembers the really important stuff, but doesn’t remember the little details at all. If it doesn’t involve partying, fooling around, or karate he kind of tends to ignore it.

He has definitely done a lot of growing in this area. Johnny still remembers the really important stuff, and has gotten better at holding onto the little details. He won’t remember everything you ever talk about, but he doesn’t file it away just because it doesn’t involve his main interests anymore.

R = Remember (What is their favorite moment in your relationship?)

Probably the first moment he saw you, and realized he wanted to win you over. He just loves remembering the way the electricity between the two of you was so strong.

The moment he realized he was in love with you and it didn’t scare him. He felt so open and safe in your relationship. It was the first time in ages he didn’t feel the need to keep his walls up high. It might be the warmest feeling he’s ever had.

S = Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?)

He is super protective. He will fight anyone who messes with you, and will always put himself between you and potential physical danger. Other types of potential protection (like emotionally) he’s not great at. He doesn’t particularly feel like you need to protect him. Once you try to jump in and defend him when Sid is bullying him, which of course results in further chastising from Sid. Johnny gets kind of upset with you over it.

Johnny still has no problem jumping in to protect you physically. Except he has gotten a bit better at the emotional side of it. He is protective of you when it comes to people who may hurt you emotionally. If he gets a bad vibe from someone he will usually try to persuade you to steer clear of them, but this can be a bit misconstrued as jealousy or him trying to be controlling. He also now feels warm and fuzzy inside when you take up for him instead of getting mad. He now understands it’s a sign of your love for him and not an attempt to emasculate him.

T = Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)

Sometimes he gets so distracted by karate and stuff that he can be sort of a bad boyfriend. So he puts the most effort in dates and gifts to make amends for not always being the best at remembering things like anniversaries.

Johnny puts a lot more effort into being around for the everyday tasks. He can’t afford to take you on many dates, so when he can take you out he puts a lot of effort into it. Same with gifts. Usually he saves up for a long time to buy you something really nice for anniversaries/birthdays/holidays because he just refuses to buy you something he thinks is crappy. Also, he struggles with the fact that you’d love anything he gives you because it’s from him. He still thinks he’s gotta give everything he’s got just to get some sort of love and acceptance in return.

U = Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?)

Let’s see fighting, partying and generally just being extremely arrogant. Taking too much care of his car and his looks, but not much else. In most ways he’s just a normal teenager in this respect.

Still fighting, but now he just generally drinks too much without the partying-which in a way is worse. He doesn’t always take care of himself. He puts blame on himself over everything that goes wrong.

A/N: I think I went a little too deep for this one?

V = Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)

He is secretly very concerned despite his overly confident demeanor. He puts a lot of effort into seeming effortless. For him it is maddeningly effortless, so really he puts in too much effort.

He doesn’t really care at all anymore. Occasionally he gives himself a once over in the mirror. He’s more comfortable with himself overall, and realizes he’s a pretty handsome guy without having to try so hard.

W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)

Absolutely, but it’s not always a good thing. In general, He can tend to lean a little too hard on his significant other. It was a bit of an issue with Ali as well. It’s not something he does on purpose, and if you mentioned it to him he’d be embarrassed. He just doesn’t feel as comfortable with that many other people. Even with his pals, he’s still putting on a bit of an act. With you he’s totally comfortable, and it makes him a bit too dependent on you.

To an extent, but he handles it better overall. He doesn’t want to be too overbearing, so he will give you a bit more space than when he was younger. Not to mention he’s not completely dependent on you for comfort. He’s gotten to a point where his attitude is more, “This is who I am. Take it or leave it.” And you’ve proven more times than he can count that you won’t leave (just maybe give him a metaphorical kick in the ass when he needs it).

X = Xtra (A random headcanon for them.)

 He was still a virgin when he graduated high school, and he lied about it to keep up his cool appearance. The truth is, Ali didn’t want to have sex when they were together, and he wasn’t going to pressure her.

Johnny absolutely tears up a bit at heart tugging films in general. However, he avoids watching anything dealing with father and son relationships. It’s a reminder of not only what he missed out on, but what he was unable to give Robby.

Y = Yuck (What are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner?)

In general he doesn’t like things he considers nerdy or uncool. That’s about as far as it goes. He’s not super deep about things he doesn’t like. You’re either cool or you’re not. He doesn’t like it when his partner is too picky or finicky. 


This is the same for both eras.

Z = Zzz (What is a sleep habits of theirs?)

He generally just tends to sleep on his stomach without a shirt. He’s warm natured so he pretty much always ends up kicking the blankets off.

There’s no real habit to be had. He just kind of falls into bed, and whatever happens then just happens.

[dropintomanga]

Kaguya and Miyuki - One of My Favorite Manga Romances Ever

“Women often fell in love with someone who seems superhuman suddenly reveals their vulnerability.”

I haven’t found many fans who talked about this, but how the relationship between Kaguya Shinomiya and Miyuki Shirogane in Kaguya-sama: Love Is War becomes truly official (Volumes 14-15 of the manga) is psychologically compelling. It’s one of the best portrayals of how romance realistically develops.

The whole premise of Kaguya-sama: Love Is War is based around an ongoing battle of wits between Kaguya and Miyuki on who will get the other to confess their feelings towards them. Both have liked each other for a while, but resort to a bunch of wacky strategies throughout the series to force a confession. It isn’t until Volume 14 where Miyuki decides to do an elaborate confession during a school culture festival on his own terms. Kaguya takes the initiative in kissing Miyuki during that moment. However, a growing sense of awkwardness and tension occurs due to their relationship changing. Both parties become unsure on how to be comfortable around each other. This leads to Kaguya’s personality suddenly shifting to her “Ice Kaguya” persona (a very cold side of herself that developed due to her upbringing) and Miyuki developing a sense of insecurity over not being good enough for Kaguya. The situation is further complicated as Miyuki wants to go to America for college and Kaguya is willing to go with him. The tension hits a turning point when Miyuki is suddenly hospitalized for burnout. Kaguya realized that Miyuki is trying to do too much and wants to save him after accepting her own flaws.

After the first kiss, Kaguya starts to become emotionally unstable as she has a conversation with her maid, Ai Hayasaka, about what happened. Kaguya talks about how intimate and long the kiss was. Hayasaka scolds Kaguya a bit and tells her that the kiss was a French kiss. There’s jokes about a French kiss being compared to actual sexual intercourse. Kaguya freaks out and she becomes Foolish Kaguya, a child-like persona that emerges due to being emotionally overwhelmed, in school the next day.

We later take a look inside Kaguya’s head where all of her subconscious personas talk about Miyuki. She has Child Kaguya, Ice Kaguya, and Foolish Kaguya as a part of her. They represent the ego, superego and id respectively. Ice Kaguya takes charge in being the dominant persona as she proclaims that she had feelings for him first. What’s important about Ice Kaguya is that she represents the kind of mask we put on in order to justify being a part of a world that demands so much from us. The Shinomiya family is a rich family that wants to decide everything for Kaguya. Ice Kaguya is an “act” to not deal with conflicting emotions and shunning everyone around her in order to protect them from her terrible side.

Miyuki becomes frightened in how to respond around Ice Kaguya while Ice Kaguya doesn’t know how to talk to him. The hospitalization happens after Ice Kaguya tries to get Miyuki to kiss him and he collapses out of a fear of looking bad. A lot of times, we don’t see what happens after the first kiss happens in romance stories. It’s usually happily ever after. But things change. There’s a gap between friends and lovers. It’s hard to take further steps after taking a huge leap (which is hard enough). This is especially the case when both parties fear vulnerability so much after being known as successful to those around them.

There’s a nice look inside Kaguya’s mind where Ice Kaguya talks to Little Kaguya about how she was raised to not be nice towards people. Never rely on others, hinder your opinions, treat others as pawns, etc. Ice Kaguya berates herself as someone who hurts others and not worthy of Miyuki’s love. But the other personas tell her that she deserves love as much as they do. It reminds me of how uncomfortable we are with our dark sides. Yeah, we do have flaws and they’re sometimes ugly. But they’re a part of who we are. They’re us. Our dark sides, like Ice Kaguya, are defense mechanisms forced to emerge to protect us. If we have sympathy towards those who are forced to do something they don’t like, it’s possible to do the same for ourselves. Self-compassion is not weakness.

The doctor who sees Miyuki at the hospital proclaims that Miyuki is suffering from “lovesickness.” He says that Miyuki has a mental health issue. Miyuki proclaims that he’s forced to be a genius due to how bad his family situation is. He never got love from his mother (who would later leave his father) after failing exams in his early youth. Miyuki later reveals that he put on a confident act in order to become the student council president. He feels that he has to try really hard in order to be on equal footing with Kaguya. A nurse tells him that it’s okay to be vulnerable. But Miyuki believes Kaguya is perfect without any understanding of her true self and decides to stress himself to be the perfect man.

There’s a point to be made that men find it hard to talk about emotions when women find it easier to do so. Sometimes, it’s much harder for men due to the roles they have to take in order to be “competitive” enough to survive. Speaking through actions is what men are supposed to excel at. That’s the role/burden men like Miyuki are given.

The romantic tension finally comes to an end when Kaguya confronts Miyuki at Christmas Eve. Miyuki tries to find a good gift for Kaguya to impress her, but ends up with a “ball in a cup” toy. He tries not to give it to her due to his need to make things perfect, but she takes it and enjoys the gift. The two would get into a long conversation at a park about being an ordinary couple for a change after Kaguya admits that being around him is good enough for her. They have a kiss that feels more proper because now they truly know each other. Miyuki then finally realizes that Kaguya’s totally okay with him failing at things from time-to-time.

“It takes courage to be average.” is a saying I heard recently. Everyone is told they’re special and capable of doing whatever they want. However, there’s a huge price to pay to chase a kind of success that feels never-ending. I’m not saying we should stop working hard for what we want. It’s just that the grind is often very lonely. There’s no time for reflection. We also can’t realistically achieve every goal we have in mind. The best indicator of someone’s happiness and success is relationships. I think the beauty of the Kaguya/Miyuki romance is that it’s okay to be a boring, average couple deep down. That’s what real romance is anyway to me - to not have so much drama in your life. I think about this a lot. As someone with mental illness, I’ve been told to date someone with a consistent routine because certain highs can be just as bad as certain lows.

I’m really glad Aka Akasaka didn’t stop the series after the culture festival kiss because that moment felt too “perfect.” I wonder if this is a criticism of how perfectionism has caused good and honest people to shun away any emotional wounds they have suffered. People usually are the problem in inflicting wounds, but they’re also the solution to processing them. Romantic relationships are mostly about being willing to put up with your partner’s flaws. It’s often difficult to share pain with someone and it’s important to admit that it’s okay to want someone you love to share it with. Honoring that desire is a big part of loving others and more importantly, yourself.

Vulnerability is sexy and when love becomes war (like it was for Kaguya and Miyuki), it’s the great equalizer to achieving true peace for all sides involved.

[stagandsteer]

Complete transcript of the Wonderland interview, by Catherine Santino, below the cut :)

In 1993, the year in which Freeform’s new thriller series Cruel Summer opens, actor Froy Gutierrez was yet to be born. Chat rooms and beepers, just two of the symbols of 90’s culture featured in the show, were absent in Gutierrez's own childhood. Instead, the 22 year old grew up among the endless, glowing feeds of social media — and the inevitable pressures that they create.

“There’s a kind of self-awareness that comes from growing up with the internet, which everyone in our cast did,” Gutierrez, who stars in the upcoming series, tells me over Zoom — his boyish charm tangible across the screen. “We’re all technically Gen Z or like, older Gen Z. And so you have to unburden yourself from curating a persona online.”

Due to the dizzying evolution of technology in the past two decades, Gutierrez and I had drastically different experiences with the internet growing up — even though he’s only seven years my junior. I fondly remember a time without the prevalence of social media, while Gutierrez was born into an era where internet presence was not only common, but expected.

Like most of Gutierrez’s peers, the actor was active on social media from a young age, but his presence has quietened over the years — even with 1.7 million instagram followers. “If there’s a general consensus on the internet of a certain readership or viewership, you know about it, because people tweet about it directly to you,'' he says. “There’s a kind of lumping in of the character you’re playing with who you are, that people do. I don’t know if it’s intentional. It’s probably just a human thing, but that happens. And it can be hard not to internalize what you read about yourself, you know? Words have power.”

In 2017, Gutierrez appeared on supernatural MTV drama Teen Wolf, a show with a massive internet fandom. Suddenly, fan theories and commentaries about his character, Nolan Holloway, came in droves, something that the young actor wasn’t necessarily prepared for. “I was still a teenager,” he says. “Around that time, you're an adult, but you’re still figuring things out. So I learned where to set my boundaries because I didn’t know where they were beforehand.”

When Cruel Summer came around, Gutierrez assumed he would be portraying the “desirable young male” he was used to auditioning for. “The first time I read the character, it definitely felt like an archetype. When I auditioned for it, I walked in and was very much myself, and Michelle Purple and Jessica Biel responded very well to it.” However, after he got the role and production ramped up, he was pleasantly surprised. “It didn’t really hit me that they were wanting to take him in such a unique direction until I showed up for wardrobe one day to do my first fitting for the pilot,” Gutierrez recalls. “I looked at the mood board for Jamie and it was like, young Heath Ledger, Keanu Reeves and Kurt Cobain. And I was like ‘Oh shit, I need to step my game up,’” he laughs. “I couldn’t get by doing the same thing that I’ve always done when it comes to characters like that.”

Cruel Summer takes place over the course of three years — ‘93, ‘94, and ‘95 — showing splices of each year in every episode. Produced by Jessica Biel, Tia Napolitano, and Michelle Purple, it centres around the kidnapping of a teenage girl and the fallout of the crime in her community in Skylin, Texas. Gutierrez plays Jamie Henson, the boyfriend of the missing girl, Kate. In her absence, a quiet nerd named Jeanette suddenly rises the social ranks and assumes Kate’s place — including dating Jamie. When Kate returns, Jeanette is suspected to be involved in her disappearance, throwing Jamie into some seriously challenging circumstances. His character could easily be a one-dimensional archetype — and truthfully, I expected him to be — but Cruel Summer took the opportunity to explore toxic masculinity and its widespread impact.

We see Jamie caught in the middle of conflict, unsure how to respond to a traumatic event that certainly no teenager expects to be faced with. He’s not a hero, but he’s not a villain either. It’s unclear whether we’re supposed to root for Jamie or not, which makes him that much more interesting to watch. “He talks a lot about his desire to protect the people around him, regardless of whether or not they asked him to protect them,” Gutierrez says of his character. “He kind of superimposes his own idea of what the people around him need. In order to maintain the peace of the people around him, he kind of robs the people around him of their agency. It’s just a really fascinating character to play in that way.”

Gutierrez has also been able to explore the ethics of true crime in a time when the genre is exploding in popularity. Though Cruel Summer is fictional, it questions the effect that public opinion can have on criminal cases — and perhaps more importantly — the well-being of the people involved. “When it comes to the investigation of a crime, you have to weigh the good it can bring into the world versus the bad it can bring. Or making one person seem suspect, or airing the dirty laundry of a private citizen for the viewership of loads of people.”

Despite his eloquent reflections on Jamie throughout our conversation, it’s clear that Gutierrez doesn’t take himself too seriously. He speaks into the camera like we’re old friends on FaceTime, and when my dog unexpectedly jumps into my frame, he gushes excitedly and asks what her name is. He’s able to laugh at himself one minute and share poignant truths the next. It’s refreshing, much like Cruel Summer.

Another likely contributor to the show’s authenticity? The fact that the cast was kept in the dark when it came to overarching plot points. Instead of knowing the show’s trajectory ahead of time, the actors would receive scripts for the next episode while they were filming — and they were subject to change. “We didn’t know where it was going,” Gutierrez says. “And we were told, “‘This might happen here, or this might happen there.’ And it would shift around.”

Without foresight into their character’s arc, the actors have no choice but to focus only on where they were in that moment — a difficult task when a single episode spans three very different years. Gutierrez faced an even greater challenge, as, unlike the two female leads, his character didn’t undergo any drastic physical transformations over the three years.

“I didn’t really compartmentalise the character,” he explains. “I kind of thought of the different years as different phases in my own life. The first year, ‘93, was a complete absence of any regret. You’re still very young, I was just thinking of like, a complete golden retriever,” he laughs. “A 16-year old boy who just wants the best and isn’t aware. ‘94 is me right before I made the decision to go to therapy, where I was making all these bad decisions and I didn’t know why. And then ‘95 was a whole desire to wrestle with those things and really look at yourself in the mirror and take accountability.”

Gutierrez didn’t only infuse personal experience into his behind-the-scenes work — some aspects made it onto the screen. The actor, whose father is Mexican, grew up spending time between Mexico and Texas and is a native Spanish speaker. Because Cruel Summer is set in Texas, Gutierrez suggested creating a similar background for Jamie.

“I was talking with Tia Napolitano, the show-runner, and I was like, ‘Hey, you know what would be really cool? What if the character is half-Mexican, too?’” Gutierrez says. “And she's like, ‘Oh, yeah, let’s write it in the script.’ And I got to write a couple lines in Spanish, which is really cool. [Jamie] could have been this mould of a cool, likeable jock. And then he ended up being this very nuanced human being, which is awesome.”

Though he is learning to appreciate all parts of his heritage, Gutierrez hasn’t always embraced his identity. “I remember feeling like I might have been not American enough for America, and not Mexican enough for Mexico,” he says. “And I remember having a bit of time in which I had an accent in both languages. Even my name — in Mexico I always went by ‘Froylan’, which is my full name. And then in the U.S., I went by Froy, because I thought it would be easier for other people to say.”

He continues: “I identify as Latino, but I”m also very wary of auditioning for Latino roles because I’m aware I don’t look like a typical Latino person. I don’t want to be someone that you can just sub in for that role, when I’m really white and blonde. And so whenever I do get a role like this, one where he’s not written to be any particular direction and we’re able to collaborate, I’m able to inject some of myself in there. So it’s been really cool to embrace all sides of my history.”

But of course, as is true for Gutierrez, Jamie’s cultural background is only a small part of who he is. Cruel Summer is committed to portraying him as a nuanced character that breaks the moulds of masculinity while tackling complex inner conflict. “Living in his shoes and walking in them, a big question that came up for me was, ‘What is the difference between guilt and shame? [Jamie]’s coping mechanism was terrible and unhealthy, and caused more pain for the people around him. But at the same time, the shame that he internalized made it worse for him. One thing I really learned, is that shame is about yourself and beating yourself up. And guilt is about taking accountability and apologising, moving forward without expecting the relationship to come back. It's just about trying to heal what happened and then moving on, on the terms that the other person sets. It’s not about you, and I think that’s what the character learns throughout the show.”

[carewyncromwell]

“All my life I've tried to make everybody happy, While I just hurt and hide, Waiting for someone to tell me it's my turn to decide... Who cares if you disagree? You are not me! Who made you king of anything? So you dare tell me who to be? Who died and made you king of anything?”

~“King of Anything” by Sara Bareilles

x~x~x~x

When Sirius Black escaped Azkaban, Ed had pretty instantly gone into “protection” mode over Chess Thornton. @cursebreakerfarrier​ He checked in with her nightly by owl and spent some very long nights that year over at her flat or with her over at his, just to keep her company. When Sirius ended up escaping Ministry captivity a second time at Hogwarts in early summer 1994, Ed was sure that Chess would want his support more than ever.

One can expect that Ed immediately sensed something was up, therefore, when Chess seemed to actually relax, about a week after Sirius escaped. And the following year, when Chess was actually assigned to the task force meant to be looking for Sirius and yet Chess didn’t seem unsure or conflicted, Ed confronted her head-on. 

“Chess...don’t make me fight with you, to uncover what’s going on,” he told her, his voice betraying some passive aggressiveness despite himself. “You know I’ve never liked arguments -- that’s why I didn’t push you earlier, but...please, don’t lie to me.”

Chess finally came clean. It turned out that Sirius had in fact been framed for betraying the Potters. Remus Lupin had gotten in contact with Chess that summer of ‘94, telling her that Sirius was staying with him for a short time and everything that had gone down at Hogwarts, including the revelation of Peter Pettigrew still being alive and being the true traitor. And now that Chess was working on the taskforce looking for Sirius, she could lead people off his scent. 

Even with Chess’s reassurance, Ed was not satisfied. He personally found it reprehensible that Sirius had taken so long to tell Chess the truth and that, if he truly was innocent, he hadn’t pulled out all the stops just to get back to her. Ed couldn’t imagine not fighting to make sure everyone knew that he never would’ve betrayed his best friend -- and if Regulus were still alive, he never would’ve put him in the situation to doubt his loyalty. Even when Ed left Regulus with the thought that they couldn’t ever have a future together, Ed knew Regulus would’ve never doubted his feelings for him...though truthfully, Ed would’ve stuck with Regulus no matter what he might’ve done, morality or not. But that was a “Gryffindor VS. Slytherin” thing. 

It didn’t take long for Ed to also put together that Albus Dumbledore was “getting the old band back together,” so to speak, after the Daily Prophet started reporting that Harry Potter and the Hogwarts Headmaster were “lying” about Voldemort being back. Ed himself dreaded the thought that it could be true -- he’d lost so much in the first War already, and he couldn’t abide the thought that he could lose anything else. The First Wizarding War had been a terrible, frightening time...and more than anything, Ed didn’t want to return there. He didn’t want to have to look over his shoulder again -- to not know who he could trust, or not know if this would be the last time he’d see that person again. 

Most of all, though...he was terrified of losing Chess after only just getting her back in his life, this time more permanently. 

And so, after a lot of deliberation, Ed sent an owl to Dumbledore, requesting a meeting. Then, after rehearsal that night, Ed covertly took the Floo to the Headmaster’s office and approached him about the rumors. 

“I already know Black is with you,” he asked softly. “Is Chess?”

Dumbledore’s blue eyes were very piercing upon Ed’s face as he surveyed him over his half-moon spectacles. 

“I believe you already know the answer to that question,” he said quietly.

Ed's lips came together silently. Although his face was as stoic as it always was when he was serious, his gaze was quaking slightly despite his best efforts. He didn’t think he’d ever been more afraid in his life. 

Nonetheless, when he spoke, his voice somehow came out level, despite its lack of volume. 

“...Then I’ll help you.”

Dumbledore cocked his eyebrows with interest. “I never took you for a warrior, Edmund.”

“I’m not,” Ed said bluntly. His eyebrows came down low over his eyes as he bowed his head, but he never broke eye contact with Dumbledore. “...But for Chess’s sake...it seems I must become one.”

Dumbledore considered him for another long moment, before his gaze actually softened. 

“You truly have grown a great deal since your school days, Edmund Rosier. Very well...I accept your service. Welcome to the Order of the Phoenix.”

Chess was very taken aback by the news of Ed’s enlistment with the Order. After making sure her friend understood the gravity of what he was doing, though, she was grateful for his support. Sirius, on the other hand, regarded Ed with a lot of suspicion...and the feeling was more than mutual. 

“You may have convinced everyone else around here with your little ‘guardian angel’ act,” Sirius muttered to Ed at one point, when he’d pulled him aside after a meeting with some other Order members, “but I remember who you were, Rosier, even if no one else does -- a blood purist coward who’ll put a happy face on things and toss his best friend to the curb, just to stay in his own cozy little bubble.” 

Ed’s steel blue eyes flashed with emotion, even as his face stayed so marble-like and stoic. 

“Don’t presume you know anything after being locked up in Azkaban for twelve years, Black,” he said very lowly. “Least of all about me.”

Sirius gave a humorless laugh. “I know more about you than I’d care to. Do you have any idea how long Chess tried to defend you, back in those days? Even after how much you hurt her, even after you showed your true colors? Eventually even she had to give up, though, once you made it clear what was really important to you -- ”

“And what was important to you back then, Black?” said Ed very icily. “You can’t tell me it was Chess, if you were willing to just waste away in Azkaban before telling her the truth either before or after Pettigrew stabbed you in the back -- ”

Sirius whipped out his wand -- Ed had just barely managed to lay a hand on his own in his jean pocket before Sirius stuck it right up against his throat.

“Lose the first friend you ever made in your life, and we’ll see how well you can function,” Sirius said in a very low, growl-like voice. 

Ed’s eyes grew a bit smaller. Before he could say anything, though, Sirius had already lowered his wand, his stormy gray eyes burning. 

His eyes were so much lighter than Regulus’s -- so much more blazing, and open as a book -- but they were the exact same shape...

“Chess may be willing to look past who you used to be, but I’m not. And I swear...if you put one toe out of line -- make even the tiniest flinch away from the Order or from Chess -- I’ll make sure you regret it.” 

Ed’s expression contorted somewhat, gaining a restrained, rather unattractive sneer. “You arrogant berk. As if you have a leg to stand on, to question my sense of loyalty...I’m not the one who talks about my deceased brother with open scorn.”

Sirius put on a smirk that nonetheless held no humor or satisfaction. If anything, there seemed something almost wounded in his expression. 

“I guess I shouldn’t be surprised that after all this time, you’ve still found a way to put Regulus up on a pedestal, just like the old biddy did,” he indicated the covered portrait of Walburga Black. “But then again, you and Regulus always were two of a kind -- stupid enough to take whatever your parents fed you, without asking twice...”

“You may see comparing me to Regulus as an insult, Black,” Ed spat, sounding openly hostile for the first time, “but believe you me -- I see it as anything but.”

He turned on his heel, turning his back on Sirius. Seeing that familiar, faintly conceited wrinkling of the nose on a face that wasn’t Regulus’s...it made him feel nauseous in a way he couldn’t explain. 

Despite his antagonism with Sirius, Ed tried very, very hard to keep their animosity between them, rather than actively fight in front of Chess. To Sirius’s credit, he actually did the same, unlike with his old school rival, Severus Snape, who he didn’t pull any punches with. It made Ed acknowledge the barest amount of respect for the man, to know he at least cared enough about Chess’s feelings enough to not actively antagonize him at every opportunity. That doesn’t mean Sirius and Ed didn’t still share a good amount of distrustful, smoldering glares over the table at Order meetings, though. 

It was honestly thanks to Lupin a lot of the time that Ed and Sirius were able to coexist in the same space. Ed had never been particularly kind toward Lupin at school -- he’d always made fun of his scars and how timid he was -- but Lupin had been much more open to Ed having turned a new leaf and actually actively tried to make Ed feel welcome, among the ranks of the Order. He actually was very touched by Ed putting himself at so much risk, all for Chess’s sake. 

“I remember you never really got into fights, even at school,” said Lupin with a small smile. “Chess has said you’ve never been an aggressive sort...I heard you even conjured up a giant pillow between the Slytherin and Ravenclaw Quidditch teams once after a bad friendly match, just to stop a fight from breaking out...”

Ed tried not to look too touched by the validation. “Well, uh...I just didn’t like the yelling, more than anything. And well, the whole thing was stupid -- there was no reason to hurt anybody, just for that...”

“All the more good of you, to work against your nature to do what’s right,” said Lupin. 

Ed wasn’t used to this kind of praise. It felt nice, but coming from Remus Lupin, of all people? It was weird. 

The songwriter rubbed the back of his neck uncomfortably. 

“...Look...I’m not doing this for any kind of moral stance. I’m only here for Chess. After how long it took to earn her trust again, and with how much she means to me...”

His eyes darkened somewhat. 

“...I can’t lose her. Not if I have any chance to protect her.”

Lupin considered Ed for a moment, before his smile grew a little softer and almost sad. 

“It’s funny,” he said very softly. 

“What is?”

“I remember James saying the exact same thing, once.”

Ed blinked in surprise. Lupin’s eyes twinkled. 

“If Sirius were willing to just look a little more closely...I think he might see some things he’d really like, in you.”

Ed’s nose wrinkled despite himself. Fortunately the rest of the Order filed in at that moment, putting the conversation to an end. 

[swishswishspiritsword]

Merchant Shang AU 2

The panic didn't really set in until they arrived at his estate–and that was still a weird fact of his life, an estate–and he had Xiao She settle "Empress Su Xiyan" in the guest house. The not-a-maid kinda bodyguard looked at him with obvious disbelief at his address for the young woman, so unnerved by it she slipped enough that her eyes were golden with slitted pupils. Shang Houhua could empathize. He too was freaking out about the sudden occurrence and realizing your boss might be involved with the Big Boss of the world you specifically emigrated away from is distressing.

Although that did mean he could check another point for her being a snake demoness over a crane demoness in his mental chart.

Shang Houhua offered her a sympathetic grimace and awkward shoulder pat.

"Xiao She should go take a break," Shang Houhua said kindly. Or at least in his best attempt. He'd gotten better at socializing since he'd actually managed to curate Actual Human (And Non-Human) Relationships, but he was still a "work in progress" as Luo Ren put it delicately or a "disaster in emotional understanding" according to the ever blunt Steward He.

Shang Houhua was kinda hoping he was somewhere in the middle.

Xiao She had given him a Look and Shang Houhua knew that it meant he would find his very irritable not-a-maid insisting on keeping watch over him personally until this situation was handled.

Or Shang Houhua was dead.

He wasn't actually sure which would come first. And was very carefully not actively thinking about it until his internal screaming could become external in the safety of his heavily warded fluffy bed.

"Yes, Master Shang," Xiao She said with a little more hiss on the words than usual. That may have been a flash of fang. 

Shang Houhua winced. So, his staff may be a bit more upset about the revelations than normal. He hesitated a little unsure if he should point it out considering the general Ignore Everything Rule the mixed species estate ran by.

"...Xiao She may want to compose herself in private unless she has decided to, ah, be more, hm, free with her identity."

That probably wasn't terribly delicate, but Shang Houhua was running on fumes, adrenaline, and specific Plot Related panic he hadn't had to deal with in a solid decade. Shang Houhua nodded again in awkward acknowledgment and Did Not See Xiao She dash up to the roof to avoid corridors or the way the charcoal girl had a thin rat-like tail poking out the bottom of her skirt. Shang Houhua had not seen things for years and went to his room to collapse in peace after one last order for the doctor to be sent to Su Xiyan's room.

-

Shang Houhua hadn't actually meant to turn his estate into some kind of halfway house for more pro-human demons or half-demons. Honestly, owning an estate in the first place had been an accident caused by picking up what could only be described as a side quest. During his early wandering around the great (terrible) world he created, free from his "fate" he'd stumbled into being a rogue cultivator to pay the bills. 

He needed money! Starting up businesses took a lot of it. And connections too! If Logistics Hell taught him anything it was this. So he used what he had to get by.

And honestly he wasn't actually terrible it turned out? He would never be a War God but he did pay attention to the basics, was a resourceful (read cheating) man,and had wanted to avoid being brutally murdered by what passed as a houseplant on some peaks. Besides as Author God he did know more than the average Sect Dropout.

Most people didn't really need big things either. He did minor things to get by. He made talismans to help ward off wandering monsters from farmers livestock and fields. He performed purifying rituals on a town's toddlers to help insure they were protected even after death. He helped fetch some plants to heal someone or an item to break a curse. It had felt a little like playing through an RPG and it wasn't the most stable but Shang Houhua was revelling in not having a bluescreen of death stalking his every breath of air.

The estate had happened when, a very tired and recently poor, Shang Houhua had met Old Sun. Old Sun was one of those eccentric independently wealthy men who never married and liked to collect weird shit. Among that weird shit was something cursed which made the entire estate a horror zone. Old Sun had done everything to stop it. He'd tried to get rid of it only for it to find him. He'd tried to get it blessed at a temple only for it to throw the monks around like dolls until they'd called quits. He'd tried to move away abandoning his home in the city for his estate in bumfuck nowhere. He'd hired cultivators, other rogues, only for them to take the money and split.

He could only dismiss his staff to protect them and set out to beg help from one of the righteous sects with the increasingly starving ghost dogging his steps and weakening him.

Shang Houhua had found the old man collapsed on the road and helped out, noticing the nice clothes he'd been wondering idly about a possible reward, when resentful energy started to waft off him making Shang Houhua choke on his lunch.

Thankfully he'd recognized the item, a minor cursed bangle of a famous courtesan that had been part of a mini quest. After working his way through as many cursed jewelry plotlines as he could he'd eventually remembered this specific bangle and set the spirit to rest, dispersing the resentful energy. 

Old Sun had woken up happy, healthy,and uncursed. He was so grateful he insisted Shang Houhua come spend the night at his home and be rewarded. Shang Houhua was not about to say no and happily accepted. He could, literally, not afford any chance at money.

He just hadn't expected the man to adopt him, shamelessly dragging him into his house.

After a while Shang Houhua accepted because he actually liked sleeping in a bed and he gained his third family. Fourth if you counted his shortly lived martial family. It took some adjustment but Shang Houhua wound up actually liking Old Sun and, even more bewildering, was liked in return. Shang Houhua helped him identify the weird shit he collected, occasionally adding to the collection, and Old Sun feed and clothed him all while cheerfully listening to rants about story ideas.

Shang Houhua had no trouble picking out his favorite, his first real and positive, family member. 

It was on one of his trips to buy ingredients to start up his soap business that had started him down the road of Demonic Social Worker. He'd helped hide one terrified teenager from a mob, sneaking her out of town, and next thing he knows she's turning up at the estate to ask to repay him. Old Sun insisted on offering her a position and kept insisting as others slowly trickled in as the Don't Ask policy of their staff choices spread and they slowly filled the empty house.

Old Sun had been delighted by the noise and people they gathered while he'd been alive. He'd happily bounced the stablemaster's baby with suspicious sharp teeth and pointy ears on his knee and chatted enthusiastically with Steward He about his collection ignoring when the man fell into first person describing the bloody history of some demonic items.

Shang Houhua had simply continued the tradition when he'd suddenly inherited and expanded it with his business, spreading out their household as traders and managers when he could.

He was fairly certain Luo Ren and himself were the only fully human people in the building. 

–

Honestly a future Demon Empress was only the next step up. Or at least that's what he tried to tell his panicking mind. And she wasn't permanent. He would lead her to Tianlang-jun and happily fuck off back to obscurity. 

Definitely. 

A knock interrupted his screaming and Shang Houhua removed the pillow from his face to clear his throat and give permission to enter. 

It was Steward He and the man was looking unruffled as always, at least until Shang Houhua noticed the way his hands were carefully hidden in his robes, his skin seemed unnaturally smooth and more youthful, and his eyes were amber tinted. 

Also upset then.

"Lady Xiyan is demanding an audience," Steward He said mostly neutrally in a way that meant he was far from neutral. "And we've received a request from a group of Huan Hua Palace cultivators to scour the town and our grounds in search of a missing disciple. The town's leaders have instructed them to obey your decision on the matter."

Shang Houhua shoved the pillow back down and Steward He allowed him a few moments to scream.

Part 1 - Part 3