#peak fond memory of childhood

[menalez]

This is random but idk who else to ask: how do you watch movies or tv or anything when in 99% of them women are relegated to decorative objects or love interests or whatever? I was rewatching the original Indiana Jones trilogy, which I love, but I feel sad that Marianne and Willie just. SOMEHOW end up in a torn dress, yelling and begging for Indie to save them. When I was younger I was under the illusion that I could be a full person and become the protagonist like Indie but now I feel that I’ll only ever be a side character.

tbh i hate such shows & movies most times. it’s why ive never given shit like indiana jones, sherlock holmes, james bond, etc the time of day. to me it’s automatically boring when women are simply side characters that are damsels in distress instead of playing a significant role in the plot. sometimes ill watch that stuff but im very annoying about it bc ill vocally complain from start to finish over it. i really recommend seeking out more female-centric media bc that’s what i do & it makes me feel better and more understood at the same time. it’s more interesting as well. im sorry that an aspect of ur childhood was disappointing to rewatch tho ❤️ ive got some similar stories…

[cumulo-stratus]

request- hanging out with your two best buds spencer and penelope and watching lady and the tramp

or could be just with spencer

i just love seeing them together and need to hang out with both of them. and i know they are both fans of Disney movies like c’mon it just makes sense

BEST BUDS [S.R]

Penelope, spencer, and you share a nice night at penelope’s watching Disney classics with spaghetti

spencer reid x gn!reader ][ fluff drabble ][ 0.6k ][ masterlist!!

a/n- MAY ILYSM FOR THIS REQUEST!! its a drabble not a full fic but oh well lol

“Spencer pass the cheese!” Penelope's many bracelets jingling on her wrist could be heard as she reached out for Spencer to hand the cheese to her. 

When Spencer placed the bag in her hand she shook it onto her bowl of spaghetti. There was now a little pile of white parmesan cheese on top of her spaghetti. 

Penelope leaned against one end of the couch wearing her Mickey headband while you and Spencer cuddled up on the other end for best buds night as Penelope so lovingly called it. The name hadn’t changed even when you and Spencer got together a few months ago.

They usually happened whenever there was the time for one, which wasn’t often. This made them special. Special meant Penelope often got very excited at the prospect of a best buds night. 

Tonight she had decided to make spaghetti to go with their viewing of The Lady And The Tramp. Ever since you had discovered Spencer's secret love of old disney movies, both you and penelope insisted on watching his old favorites.

Penelope had heard about this from Spencer when she saw him blushing at texts, and being the guy who never normally even takes a second glance at his phone unless it's work related. Of course, Penelope being the lover of matchmaking insisted on knowing what Spencer was looking at.

Said previous events led to the three being cozied up on the couch with the light of the movie illuminating Penelope's otherwise dark apartment. The old style music and animations brought back memories from Spencer's childhood. 

“You know my mom used to play this for me a lot” Spencer spoke with a fond smile, and you could almost see the memories flickering like old film behind his eyes. You smiled up at your boyfriend from his shoulder. You placed a small kiss on his growing stubble. 

ever so often, either penelope, you, or Spencer would make a comment (though most of them were spencers). Spencer usually said something about how the animation was done, or a historical inaccuracy. “You know that architecture is quite unrealistic for supposedly the early 1900s- are you guys seeing this brickwork?” he would call out, only earning a giggle from the others. 

When Penelope made a comment it was usually along the lines of “ahhhh!!! look at these two cutie pies!!” and other phrases in the same vein. Her excitement was at its peak in the classic spaghetti sharing scene. there had been lots of penelope screams/yelps of joy. 

You preferred to stay quiet, leaving a sentence hanging in the air every once in a while. But you found more pleasure in listening to your two best friends.

The more the night wore on, the more the warm bowl of spaghetti in your stomach and the soft sound of Spencer's heartbeat lulled you into a drowsy state against his chest. His warmth radiated into your soul, allowing a blanket of peace to roll over you as the movie's credits started to play. ‘’

Spencer looked down to find you asleep on his chest, and his second thought after how adorable you were- was how was he going to bring himself to wake you up and go home for the night. 

Then again, Spencer noticed someone asleep. Penelope had her head rested against the couch and an empty bowl still in her hands. She also sported a small squishmallow of a unicorn at her side. with her eyes closed you could see the eyeshadow she hadn’t had the thought to take off yet.

And as spencer looked at his two best friends, and then back to the tv with the credits still rolling, he wondered how he got so lucky.

spare a reblog?

[tenchikotheartist]

Frick it, we ball

KISMET HEADCANNONS for some future fan stuff I wanna make... Goes with this post kinda

Under a cut because it's LONG (the fixation has been REAL)

Gen

They band was formed shortly after the events of Trolls 1. It's the only way they make sense in my mind's timeline.

Branch was trying to get more involved with Troll village without relying on Poppy to connect him with people. He formed his own group of friends, and they became Kismet after realizing how much they enjoyed harmonizing/performing together.

These guys give me frat boy energy for some reason. They just collectively become more chaotic when they're around each other. Yes, even Branch. He and Hype play hot potato with the braincell because otherwise, nothing would get done in this group.

As they got to know one another, teasing one another became their primary love language. Lots of jabs and quips will fly among them when they're together, but they each know it's all in good fun.

Branch

Branch kept his involvement in the band a secret because, well...y'know. He has complicated history with being in a boyband, so he wanted to explore his feelings about Kismet without being bombarded with input from people outside the group.

He's fond of his friends and genuinely enjoys being a part of the band though! He just wants to be sure he's a part of this boy band because he's happy being with them and not because he's trying to recapture something he'd lost 20 years ago.

At first, the others were (understandably) hurt by Branch's desire to keep his place in the band a secret, but after he explained his reasons, they were willing to support him.

They were absolutely thrilled when he finally becomes open about the band though!

During the secrecy period, when he performs in Pop Village, he hides his identity behind a disguise that somehow works (Branch, every time it works: "wtf????"), and he goes by a stage name.

Hype

Officially the group leader, but he's more of a mediator than anything. He relies on the rest of the group to give their input for any big band decisions, but he coordinates band meetings, schedules gigs, and works out compromises if there's any group conflicts.

He and Branch had been childhood friends before The Incident(s) estranged them. Back in the Troll Tree, they'd been neighbors whose parents (Branch's grandma; Hype's mom) set up on frequent playdates, so they'd been really close.

They reconnected after the events of movie 1, Hype introduced Branch to Trickee and later Boom. Trickee brought in Ablaze and the rest was history.

Hype is a social butterly but he's otherwise one of the more calm personalities in the group. He feeds off of other people's energy and is a bit of a people-pleaser. Luckily, he's pretty good at finding the right crowd to run with, otherwise he'd probably land in so much trouble.

Boom

Hype's cousin, and a big party person! Before the band took off, he DJ'd at a party venue in Pop Village. That same place was also where Kismet got their first gig!

He loves loud music and flashy parties where he can shine on the dance floor and make memories people he may only know for a night.

Peak ADHD Energy™. He's a chatterbox. He has no volume control. He tunnel visions so hard, he becomes that B99 headphones meme. The man has cool guy syndrome, no doubt about it!

For the creation of the Band earliest albums, Boom took charge as the producer. He loves messing with music, mixing and remixing sounds on his free time and experimenting with the genre.

Trickee

A thrill-seeking menace to society. He's adventurous and loves taking huge risks for the adrenaline rush. He's the type of guy who would go down a waterfall in a barrel or ski down a dangerous mountain just to see if he survives it.

Everyone in the band is in agreement about protecting Trickee from his own shenanigans. They are 70% of his self-preservation senses.

He also loves a party scene and can often be found with Boom leading the charge towards any good time.

You know that sense of dread before performing in front of a crowd? The way your belly flips and your heart races and you're sure you're shaking hard enough for everyone to see? Trickee lives for that shit when he's in the band. The jitters can get to him, for sure, but afterwards, the man is LIVING from coming out alive on the other side, and he's sharing that thrill with everyone else in the band!

Ablaze

A Rock Troll who has lived among the Pop Trolls since he was a teenager. He stumbled across them while looking for a place to belong, and despite what he was raised to believe about Pop Trolls, he came to love their warmth and friendliness. So he moved in and let everyone assume he was just an odd-looking Pop Troll.

He an Trickee are housemates (podmates?)--not for romantic reasons but because they're longtime friends. When Trickee moved out of his family's home, Ablaze invited him over, and they liked the living arrangement enough to keep it permanent.

At first, Ablaze isn't open about his identity as a Rock Troll, but as he grew closer with the other members of Kismet, he came out to them. By the events of Trolls 2, he's open about being a Rock Troll.

Ablaze's personality sits somewhere in the realm of both chaotic and laid back. On the outside, he's usually pretty chill, but if Boom or Trickee have trouble afoot, Ablaze is usually there egging them on in the background, much to Branch's dismay.

He becomes extremely energetic when he's performing. The more exciting the song, the more vibrant he becomes! The energy is one of the reasons he loves pop music so much, but he can also get hyped from performing rock music. He gets kinda intense though lmao.

The first time the rest of Kismet sees him jamming to rock, they're like "OH. He's definitely a rock troll O_O" They support their rock-n-roll brethren 🤟😔

He has a special interest in fire, particularly fireworks. Back in Pop Village, he even made a business of it, making small rockets, sparklers, and other celebratory items for all your Pop party needs.

Anyway that's all the headcannon stuff I'll share for now. Hope y'all liked reading xD I'm really hoping my attention span will stick around long enough for me to share more in the future, because this fixation has been A Time™/pos

[king-krisu]

SAME IN INGLIS - Mic Mac

Yes Hello you ask and you shall receive: a series where I take one song and explain some of the slang or any references that might get lost in an ordinary translation. Usually I or any of the other mains doing translations don't want to make posts too long by adding footnote after footnote, so some stuff might be lost intentionally. I'm using this series to dedicate my time specifically for all the stuff I usually don't comment on. I'm gonna include everything in here, even some of the "obvious" things. So up first by popular request:

MIC MAC

So firstly, the name. Mic Mac was a Finnish youth clothing brand between 1972 and 2013. They were particularly known for their provocative and shocking ways of advertising especially in the 1980s. They had their own brand of jeans that were extremely popular, but they also sold other brands in their stores like Levi’s or Wranglers. From what I know they only had stores in Helsinki/Uusimaa but correct me if I’m wrong on that. For a lot of us Mic Mac is a very 80s/90s brand, their peak was during those times as well.

Jere has a lot of other interests that are very reminiscent of a childhood in the 90s. Even the name Jere was very popular in the 90s, it’s the equivalent of Justin or Jake in english. In this song he talks about Pokemon cards, which I’m sure a lot of 90s kids will remember being very popular. In the same breath he mentions Habbo Hotel, a Finnish online virtual world game and chat room founded in 2000 that’s still active today. in Viulunkieli he references Bomfunk MC’s Freestyler which is like the most 90s song in this country you could play. He also grew up listening to other artists that had their peak in the 90s/early 2000s, like Eminem or Finteligens. My point here is that it’s clear he has a lot of fond memories of his childhood, and he lets them influence a lot of his music and lyrics. Mic Mac in particular feels almost like an ode to that time in his life and in Finland generally.

Now, to the actual lyrics. I’m gonna copy paste the entire verse/chorus and highlight slang/spoken Finnish, and I’m gonna take a few particular words from each part and explain them. The cursive words are just slang with a parenthesis of “official Finnish” next to them, and the bolded ones I’m gonna explain.

Meen (menen) ajassa taaksepäin

Mutta onneksi ne ajat taakse jäi

Olin merkillinen enkä esimerkillinen

Käyttäytymisen alkeet jäi hei

Oli rasavillin elkeet, katoin (katsoin) Smackdownii TV:st

Ja otin mittaa mun isoveljest (minun isoveljestäni)

Meno epäterve

Tuolit lens (lensi) minkä kerkes (kerkesi) kavereiden kesken

Olin pieni ja paskiainen, alakoulun penkillä laiskiainen

Poden vielki morkkist ja henki haisee siit tupakin (tupakan) maistiaisesta (Hyi!)

Ja niist muutamast katkonaisest (katkonaisesta) muistosta ne vielki hävettää

Ei muisteta pahalla ku tuut vastaa unohdetaa menneet ja halataa (halataan)

Rasavilli is a word derived from swedish (rasvill), which is extremely common especially for Finnish slang. It means an unruly, mischievous child, willfully causing chaos

Meno epäterve I decided to highlight this because the word meno in this context is used in a colloquial way to describe the atmosphere of something, so for this instance the vibe was crazy or something. Officially it means an errand or plans, or financial expenses, but a lot of us also use it as a descriptive word

Morkkis I’m sure you remember from his song Morgan, but it just means being badly hungover and having anxiety. It can though also be used to just in general feel regretful over something in the past

The chorus actually doesn’t have any spoken/slang Finnish except one word from what I can tell so I’m not gonna include all of it here

Menin olohuoneeseen odottaa (odottamaan) tuoretta pullaa uunista

-

Jolloin meil (meillä) oli päällä Mic Maccii, oltii (olimme) Mic Macci jätkii

Ei ollu (ollut) värillä väliä kuhan (kunhan) fit oli fättii

Fätti I chose to highlight this just to show that often we’ll take English words and add ä/ö to them to make them sound Finnish. Like here the word is Fat, but because the -A sounds like our -Ä we just type it out like that. Another example of this would be how a lot of the times you’ll see the word rap written as räp, even though officially we just use the english word (although as a verb I think even officially it is räpätä with the -Ä)

Taas ajassa taaksepäin

Mun (minun) suuri suu sai isommat pojat ravistelee (ravistelemaan)

Olin pihapelien Jarkko Ruutu

Leuka tummu ku (tummui kun) pojan nassikat taistelee

En alkanu aristelee (alkanut aristelemaan)

Jos piti frendi tempun takii (takia) tuikata tulee

Enkä astella heikoil jäillä

Jonka johdosta mummo sai kuivata kuteet (slang: vaatteet)

Jotain samaa on faijas ja mussa (minussa)

Ei omena parka pudonnu (pudonnut) kauas puusta

Mutta sillon ku (silloin kun) putosin, ni tuhosin mun (niin tuhosin minun) ranteen ihan tuusannuuskaks

Vielki Habboo on kiinni portit

Mä palautan pöllityt Pokemon-kortit

Jarkko Ruutu A Finnish former ice hockey player who went all the way to the NHL, who was known for his particularly aggressive and rough playing

Pojan nassikat Nassikka is an older, almost colloquial descriptive way to refer to a little boy

Frendi/faija/pöllityt These are all slang words derived straight from other languages which we do a lot, especially with swedish or russian. Frendi comes from the english friend, faija comes from the swedish far (father), and pölliä possible comes from the swedish bälla (to steal/use)

Astella heikoilla jäillä So this isn’t like fully clear BUT there’s this children’s TV infomercial that has run every autumn/winter since 1986 and probably does today as well, that warns children not to walk on ice as it can be deceptively weak. It is ingrained into everyone's memories because the bear that falls into the ice looks so miserable and terrifying as he says “Watch out for weak ice”, and since this song is about his childhood I’m gonna go out on a limb here and say it’s a reference to that

Tuusannuuskaks This is a colloquial term used to describe something shattering into a thousand pieces. I honestly couldn’t find the full origin for this but most likely it comes from the swedish word tusen (thousand) and the rest is beyond me lol (except that nuuska means snuff so maybe it’s about snuff being easily spread in a thousand places)

Ja ku mentiin liian pitkälle läppien kaa (kanssa)

Istuttiin jälki-istunnossa Mic Macci jätkien kaa

Läppä means a joke, but the official word for it is vitsi. I’m not sure of the origin but some researcher said it comes from the swedish word läpp, meaning lip, and heittää huulta is a way to say someone is joking (Throwing lip), and in a colloquial way you say heittää läppää, which means the same thing

Jätkä means a young man, either in a neutral way or depending on the context a condescending way. The english equivalent would be a guy. It’s also what we call the card Jack in a card deck lol

So that’s finally all the lyrics done. As you can see from the cursive words, when comparing them to the “correct” or official word, we often just get rid of the last letter in a word when speaking. We really are a lot like the french in that way, we tie words in a sentence together by matching vowels with consonants, get rid of vowels if they seem to obstruct the flow of a word or just change a word radically to make something easier to say quickly (like minussa -> mussa).

I hope at least some of this was interesting, I’m very passionate about slang and word origins and there’s a lot of Käärijä songs that have even more crazier slang that I can’t wait to get into (like Alaks Olee or Koppi Tules). Until then, hope this was informative/entertaining <3

[fatalfairies]

SECOND PRINCE!SATORU GOJO x CARETAKER!READER

art credit: @/iorighin on X

a/n: not proofread but it’s cute

When you first saw Satoru,you felt sorry,such a beautiful man in the peak of his youth,he was sitting on the bed with his back supported on the pillows on the headboard slat of the large,luxurious bed.

“If you feel pity,please leave and do not return” were his very first words to you as you looked at him feeling questioned. Yes,you did feel sorry for him but you did not pity him.

“Well then,Your Highness,there is not any chance I am leaving.”

At first,he was distant to you yet polite. He tried to avoid as much help as he could from you. But maybe he forgot that the only reason you’re present here is for the sole reason of taking care of him and if that required you to use a little force,then you wouldn’t really mind. A part of you was being selfish and you were fully aware of it.

You had been recently widowed after your stupid bastard of a husband sacrificed himself to a war which brought no fruition and you were relieved. But the consequences which came along with was something you wouldn’t accept by any means,neither were you ready to become a nun and devote your life to god nor did you want to remarry most likely yet another man.

And this was the perfect opportunity for you for to become the second prince’s caretaker. To the eyes of others,a woman who had been recently widowed is helpless and serving a member of the Imperial Family would help with that.

During the first few months,Satoru disliked you,no that’s being too harsh,he by no means disliked you but he disliked how even a flutter of his eyelashes would draw your attention to him.

He had been pampered and taken care his entire life,as a prince it is nothing surprising.

Yet why is that under the gaze of your eyes,he feels so vulnerable and cared for like never before.

Satoru feels as though he had been brought back to his childhood when you promise to read him a book or take him to a stroll in the lovely imperial gardens or play board games with him.

In all these months,you had find out many things about him and one thing you were definetly sure of is that he never craved the power of the throne and crown as many might assume. All he wanted was to be free and enjoy his life.

As a Prince who has no way of inheriting the throne,he should have these luxuries but that is utterly wrong. He is always followed around by some guards or maids as though he is a helpless child and that is all because of this sickness.

It might be the cause he’s weak despite being born in a dynasty of powerful men and women but that is no reason to treat him as a porcelain doll that can break at any moment.

And he hates himself for it,sometimes.

Spending all these months with you he has rediscovered many things he thought were long lost in his distant memories. You were reading him a novel as a gift after he had his meal and medicine like a good bo..prince.

“Why are you staring me with such intensity,Your Highness ? Are you not enjoying this book ?” You asked him,your eyes leaving the pages of the book as you stare into his cerulean eyes. Hearing your voice other than reading the lines of the book,he looks at you,snapped back to reality as his mouth gapes open slightly,”No,you’re a good storysteller and have gotten the voice of a heavenly nymph.”

“Why,thank you. I’ll be sure to read them more to you since you are so fond of me doing so.” You return words back,playfully. Maybe there were improvements in your relationship with him afterall.

You didn’t quite expect the distant man you met months ago to have this playful. Although,it is indeed infinetly better than a man who acts like he’s constipated,such as your dead husband.

“Say,My Prince,what is your favourite flower ?” You asked looking at him as your hands were supporting his tall figure as you strolled with in the vast garden with a smile on your face.

“Any flower you bring me.” He says,chuckling. “I’m serious. Do not be silly.” “But you do prefer that.”

“Hm,alright then,I’ll just consider my favourite flower yours too.”

“I’d prefer that far better,anything favoured by you suddenly becomes favoured by me as well.”

“You’re being such a deceptive charmer. I am relieved I am the only lady who knows this side of yours,Your Highness.”

“It’s Satoru. Also,why ? are you afraid they would inevitably fall for my princely charms ?”

“Quite the opposite,My Prince.”

“Rude. But it’s sweet coming from you.”

Maybe this was the starting of something much more intimate yet unknown to both of you what would end up blooming in your hearts.

[zoeysdamn]

Bloodied petals - Xavier Thorpe x reader | Part.4

Summary: You remember memories of your childhood with Xavier, hoping to get some courage from it to talk things out with him. Wednesday starts to suspect something, and Principal Weems isn't happy with either of you.

Warnings: angst, mention of blood, underage drinking, swearing. IMPORTANT: the last part of the taglist had made my tumblr bug so hard so it didn't work, I'm sorry for those who hadn't received a notification while being tagged. If the problem continues for further parts, I'll consider deleting the taglist bc fuck I just lost 40 minutes re-editing this chapter 3 times before finally achieving to post it

[Masterlist] [Part.1] [Part.2] [Part.3]

Xavier had been your first kiss. You doubted he remembered it but you definitely did. When your aunt had dropped you at the Thorpe manor for the first time, you were just turning 6 and had that funny haircut that almost hid your eyes. Your aunt Cordelia wasn’t so fond of this hairstyle, but things had been hard for you since your mom’s passing less than six months ago; taking care of the birdnest you were calling hair could wait for the situation to settle down. 

Aunt Cordelia had explained to you that you were going to live with a dear friend of hers for some time because she couldn’t take you with her to an upcoming witch congress on the other side of the world. Couldn’t or wouldn’t you didn’t know, to you the only thing that mattered was that you were going to a foreign place, and your mom wasn’t here anymore to comfort you. 

“You’ll be fine here,” had assured your aunt while your luggage was taken out of a car by the butler. 

“Can’t I come with you?” you had asked again with a wobbling lip and watery eyes. 

“You know you can’t pumpkin,” said Aunt Cordelia. “Mr.Thorpe has a son about your age, I’m sure you’ll become friends very fast.” 

And just like that, she left, and you found yourself alone in a manor you didn’t know. 

Mr.Thorpe had been intimidating but the good thing was he hadn’t more time for you than your aunt did, and as soon he introduced himself to you he left too. So you had fled to your new room and hidden in the closet to cry. You didn’t want to be here, you didn’t even want to be raised by Aunt Cordelia ; you wanted your mom, but that was impossible now. 

Then, you had heard the creak of the closet’s door being opened and you had timidly peaked up from behind your hand. A little boy was crouching down to your level, looking at you curiously with his big hazel eyes. 

“Why are you sad?” he had asked with his childish voice. 

Taken aback by his question, you had wiped the tears on your cheeks, “I’m not sad, I’m just lonely.” 

He had looked at you curiously; then he had raised his little hand to brush away the hair that was obstructing your face. The gesture had made you flinch a bit, but he was gentle and somehow, you had felt like you could trust this boy. He had beamed, exposing the gap left by a missing tooth. 

“You have pretty eyes!” he had exclaimed. 

“Thanks?” you had said unsure, still sniffling. 

He nodded vigorously, his smile plastered on his chubby face. Then he extended his hand to you. “Wanna get out of here? I know where the cookies are hidden, we can search for them together, it’ll be fun!” 

This brought a small smile to your face for the first time in weeks, and you had taken his hand. Within the next few days, you had your hair cut. That’s how you met Xavier Thorpe. 

From there, your friendship bloomed. Aunt Cordelia tried to spend at least six months a year with you, and you lived at her house for that time. Well, she tried, and sometimes you found yourself dropped by the Thorpe manor more than intended. This didn’t bother you, you enjoyed Xavier’s company, and you were best friends after all. And considering his own father was also absent frequently, he loved when you were there. When you turned 12, your aunt brought you along on her trips to make a sort of pilgrimage around all the important sites of witchcraft around the world. According to her, it was time for you to learn more about your history and soak up their energy. The trip was so long, you didn’t see Xavier for two whole years. And when you came back to the Thorpe manor at 14, the both of you had changed a lot. Gone was the little boy with scraped knees and round cheeks, the teenager you met at the door was lanky and definitely taller than you now. 

“Hey,” he had greeted you with a lopsided grin. The twinkle in his eyes though hadn’t changed the slightest. 

“Hi,” you had smiled back. “You’ve let your hair grow,” you noticed. 

“You lost the braces,” he counter-attacked, not losing his smile for a second. 

He opened his arms and you didn’t lose a breath before diving into the hug. Oh, you had missed him. You had thought that everything would be like usual, but since puberty, you definitely noticed that things had indeed changed between you two. Your aunt asked a little more about Xavier when you went home, and you didn’t look at him the same way. He was more…attractive somehow; you loved the long hair. The same week you came back, the two of you went to a party with some of his friends from the normie school he went to. This wasn’t the first time any of you had alcohol, but it definitely was the first time you got drunk. A silly game was suggested and in your already advanced tipsy state, you and Xavier had thought this would be fun. You remembered vaguely the rules being to spin a bottle and then kiss someone or drink to avoid it, or something. To be honest most of your memories of that night were kind of blurry ; but when the bottle had pointed in your direction and your eyes had met Xavier’s, you distinctly remember your heart missing a beat. Maybe you had thought about protesting or something, maybe your mind had been too cloudy to properly ponder whether or not you should do this. It didn’t matter, because the next thing you knew then, Xavier had leaned to you and had pressed his lips against yours. That’s how you got your first kiss, by kissing your best friend during a drinking game. 

The next day the hangover had been so hard, Xavier didn’t remember half of the previous evening, not even your kiss. But you definitely did. Over the years you had forced yourself to push it down, thinking it was only a silly teenagers game and that you shouldn’t get too excited about this. 

Thinking about this now, you thought that you had been in love with Xavier for far longer than you imagined. You should have seen it coming, and yet here you were, with flowers slowly growing in your lungs because of your feelings. 

You were wandering in Jericho as the other Nevermore students were dispatched in different areas for Outreach day. Principal Weems had reminded you that everyone’s presence was requested for the inauguration ceremony at the end of the day – that yes, even you miss L/N are to attend this. Then she had let you free for the remainder of the day, and you were glad she did. You had a few things to buy at Jericho, this could be the occasion. But while you were making your purchases you were starting to realize that you were only postponing the moment when you’ll eventually have to talk with Xavier. 

He had left the Nightshades’ crypt quite upset, it pained you even more to know that he was mad at you. You needed to fix this and fast. So you ended up pushing the Weathervane’s doors  open, eyes searching for familiar hazel hair. Enid had texted you where Xavier had the displeasure of working that day and reading the coffee shop's name had made you wince. Hopefully, Tyler won't be working today. 

“Hey L/N,” you heard from the counter and you cursed internally. Turning to the counter, you narrowed your eyes at the curly-haired boy. 

“Galpin,” you greeted him half-heartedly as you came closer. Ever since what he and his friends had done to Xavier on last year’s Outreach day, you despised him. 

“Do you, uh, want to order something?” he asked. 

God, the way he acted all innocent and kind made you want to punch him in the face. On any other day you probably would have, but right now you were just drained. 

“Sure,” you finally let out, “I’ll have a large cappuccino with two shots of espresso, please.”

“Coming right up,” he said before starting to make your order, and you find a seat next to the window. 

For a moment, you put your face in your hands like it would give you some peace for a while. Everything had escalated so quickly, you didn’t even know if there was going to be an actual end to all of this. 

The sound of a mug being dropped in front of you on the table made you look up, and the sight of Xavier surprised you. 

“Tyler mentioned that you had ordered something,” he explained to your surprised expression. 

Glancing to the boy awkwardly standing behind the counter, who tried to look like he was busy and not looking at the two of you, you gave him the slightest nod of the head as a thanks. Xavier sat on the opposite bench, arms plopped on the table nervously. 

“Look I–”

“There’s something–” you both started at the same time. It made you chuckle nervously, “Go on,” you pressed him gently. 

He passed a hand through his hair nervously, “I- I’m sorry I’ve been such a dick yesterday, okay?”. The guilt in his eyes was evident and you were relieved to hear that he had calmed down. “I shouldn’t have called you a liar.”

“No, that’s on me,” you muttered, playing with the still untouched mug. “I’m…not feeling well these days,” you finally admitted. 

Xavier’s eyebrows knitted together in worry. To his knowledge, you never had any serious health issues. The flu once in a while maybe, but nothing that sounded that bad. He leaned closer to you over the table, a serious look on his face. 

“What’s going on?” he asked in a hushed, yet gentle voice. 

Suddenly, all the courage you had built up vanished. You had been so confident that you were going to tell Xavier everything, that this was the only way of making things right. You felt like you owed him that, after all, he had everything to do with your condition. 

But as you were about to expose the truth to him…something stopped you. 

The feeling of a warm hand on your trembling ones made you snap back to reality. Xavier’s face was fully painted in worry now. 

“You okay?” he asked. “You zoned out for a second.” 

You nodded slowly, gulping. No need to lie to yourself, you knew exactly what was stopping you from telling Xavier everything. The fear of losing him. Deep down you were afraid that if you told him about the Hanahaki disease, and what – who – caused it, he would end up leaving you. And you were far more afraid of losing Xavier than you were of coughing flowers. Because without Xavier, you feared that you'd end up alone again. And you never wanted to ever feel like that again. 

Licking your lips, you wondered what you should say to him. So you lied again. 

“I’m ill,” you blurted out. “I got sick around a week ago, that’s why I’ve been so distant lately.”

Technically, you weren’t really lying to him. It had been more than a week since the first symptoms, but the rest was true. You simply choose…not to disclose everything. 

“Shit,” he swore under his breath, “are you feeling okay? What is it?”

“I’m fine,” you squeezed his hand in reassurance, “I had no idea of what it was until recently so…”

“Is this serious?” he inquired again. 

Flashes of the pages mentioning the inevitable death of patients appeared in your mind. 

“No,” you finally let out. “I’ll get better at some point I’m sure. Bought a few things to make a potion to ease the symptoms.” 

Xavier glanced at your bag and nodded. Whether or not he believed you, he didn’t press the matter further. 

“I should have been honest with you sooner, it’s just…it had been a couple of rough weeks,” you said with a weak smile. 

He nodded in understanding, still you could see he was still worried about you. “Yeah, I get it…between that, Wednesday's arrival and the whole monster thing it had been a little bit crazy, right?”

You slightly frowned at him. It wasn’t it, he was misreading the situation completely! As you were about to say something, you suddenly became very aware of faint whispers around you. So did Xavier apparently because the two of you whipped your heads around at the same time. Glancing behind your shoulder you noticed a group of normies teenagers throwing glances at you, whispering and giggling among themselves. Some of their words reached your ears.

“...think…’re together?...”

“maybe…freaks…from Neverm…”

“...kinda cute…couple…”

You felt your face burn. Not in shame, but for the first time in the possibility of what it implied. Many people had mistaken Xavier and you as a couple before, but it was the first time you truly felt flustered by the idea of it. 

Then Xavier pulled his hand off of yours and the sudden loss of contact made your heart drop. He sank into his seat further, putting more distance between the two of you. Eyes flickering to him in disbelief, you only met his sorry expression. 

“I didn’t want to make you uncomfortable,” he muttered while casting his eyes away. 

You wanted to protest, to say that it didn’t make you uncomfortable at all, but words were stuck in your throat. As were petals. 

“I should probably go back to work,” said Xavier while getting up. “But I’ll finish in an hour, if you want to wait?”

“Sure,” you mumbled. 

Tears started to burn behind your eyes. This wasn’t how it was supposed to go at all. The light ring of the doorbell made both of your heads turn to Wednesday who had just arrived. Her sole presence, usually not unwelcomed, was dreadful to you and you felt like you were becoming lightheaded. The burning inside your chest bloomed and the whole coffee shop felt suffocating. Raising from your seat abruptly you gathered your bag and vest without a word. 

“Where are you doing?” asked Xavier lightly touching your shoulder. 

“I’m- I’m not feeling well,” you excused yourself, which made Wednesday raise her eyebrow as she came to your side. “I need some air.” Feeling Xavier’s worried eyes on your back you squeezed the hand on your shoulder. “We’ll talk about this later, okay?” you whispered to him. 

He seemed to hesitate, but between your pleading eyes and the intense bored expression on Wednesday’s face, he finally conceded. 

“Okay,” he said softly. “I’ll see you later.”

You smiled weakly at him before rushing to the exit, head low. Walking rapidly through the streets you hurried until you found an empty alley which you immediately rushed into before throwing up in a garbage can. The flowers and blood mixed together regurgitated from your sore throat, as quickly as they had appeared within your chest. Tears flooded down your cheeks as the last petals left your mouth. Coughing fits were getting more and more unpredictable. You choked on your own breath, mouth tasting bitter and throat ablaze. If you didn’t do something real quick, you were going to die. But for now, you just felt so, so tired. Weems and the inaugural ceremony be damned, you were going back to Nevermore to sleep your problems away. Then, you’ll take it from here. 

In the end, returning to the school to sleep and avoid facing your problems gave you more problems. A few hours later you were standing in Principal Weems’ office alongside Wednesday, getting a lecture about setting Crackstone’s statue on fire. 

“For the hundredth time, I didn’t set fire to that statue!” you pleaded to the principal. 

“And what evidence of your innocence do you have, miss L/N?” snapped Weems back. “Should you have attended the ceremony like you were supposed to, we wouldn’t have this conversation.” 

“I attended this ridiculous ceremony,” noted Wednesday out loud, “yet you’re suspecting me too.” 

She shot a deadly glare at your impassable roommate, “And I have every reason to miss Addams. The two of you had good motives to set this statue on fire, and miss L/N had mysteriously disappeared just before the ceremony.” 

“I wasn’t feeling well that’s all,” you tried to defend yourself. “Do you really think I’d brand myself a witch in front of all of Jericho? Those people hate my guts, I don’t want to have anything to do with their shitty town!” 

Weem’s hand hit her desk with force, “Mind your language, young lady!”

Wednesday only rolled her eyes at the whole ordeal. You on the other hand, were pretty sure she had something to do with it – but unlike you she had a solid alibi. And surprisingly, she stepped in your defense. 

“Y/N is right about not feeling well these days,” she interjected, making both Weems’ head and yours snap to her. “She sometimes coughs in her sleep, this is very unpleasant.”

Principal Weems narrowed her eyes at you, “Is that true, miss L/N? Have you fallen ill?”

You nodded slowly, “Just small flu. Must’ve caught a cold during the Poe cup.” 

The principal looked pointedly at the two of you, breathing hard through her nostril. Then she threw an accusatory finger at your pair.

“I want,” she articulated slowly, “the two of you out of my office. Now. And I don’t want to ever hear about you either.” 

None of you needed to be asked twice. Once in the corridors and far enough from Weems’ office, you turned to Wednesday. 

“Thank you for having my back with Weems,” you said quietly, “you didn’t have to do that.”

“No I didn’t,” she repeated. “I was right, you do cough at night and it is unpleasant.” 

That made you frown slightly. None of your roommates shouldn’t have been able to hear you, you still casted the silencing spell every night. 

“Since when?” 

“About a week,” she said, while narrowing her eyes. 

You started to think hard. It had been far more than a week since you had started to cast the spell. This was basic magic, a simple but efficient spell that you had been practising for years. There was no reason for you to fail it. The only logical explanation…was that your magic was weakening. The natural reaction for your mind would be to list every reason for it not to be possible, but then you thought about the sudden stop of your spell during the Poe cup, which had made your boat stop dead in its tracks; and so it added up. The disease had not only damaged your body, but it had also consequences on your powers. This was definitely concerning. 

“You are indeed sick, aren’t you?” asked Wednesday. At the surprised look on your face, she quickly added, “Don’t think I care, I’m just readjusting your position on my suspects' list by considering all the parameters.”

You scoffed in disbelief “I’m on your suspect list? No shit, Wednesday?”

“It is perfectly plausible,” she said plainly. “With your powers and knowledge in potions, you have the ability to increase your strength I suspect, and you know the school’s grounds by heart,” you heard her listing, “you’ve spent more time alone than usual for the past weeks, with no one to testify of your presence elsewhere than on the crime scenes, and when I started to suspect Xavier you immediately fled to his defence without proof, like you knew for sure he couldn’t be the monster. So tell me Y/N,” she continued while looking at you dead in the eye, “why couldn’t you be the killer?” 

Struck by her question you could only blink in disbelief. What. the. hell? 

“Excuse me what?” you articulated after long seconds of silence. 

“You should be honored,” she said flatly, “it requires some skills to be added to a potential suspect list.” 

“I don’t want to be on a fucking suspect list,” you spat, “you’re delusional Wednesday.” 

“My observations and suppositions are rarely wrong, I’m not the one burying herself in denial.”

Stepping closer to her you gritted your teeth together. “I can’t be the monster, I literally can’t.” 

“What proof do you have of that?” she retorted. 

Fuming, you tried to not play her game. But staying calm in front of her insolent lay back behavior was starting to be incredibly harder. “Drop it,” you spat. 

“You’re just proving me right.”

That’s when you lost it, “I CAN’T BECAUSE I’M FUCKING DYING OKAY?” you roared at her. 

For a moment, nothing but echoes of your words resonated within the corridor’s walls. Your ragged breaths contrasted with Wednesday’s neutral expression, unfazed by your scream. Only after a few seconds of a mortifying silence did you realize what you just did because you had lost your nerves. Shutting your eyes tightly you internally prayed that no one around heard you. 

“I don’t think you’re lying,” simply said Wednesday. 

You let out a scoff, “I’m not, trust me. I’m sick, and my health is deteriorating every day. If you don’t want to believe me that’s fine but leave me the fuck out of your stupid list.” 

She raised an unimpressed eyebrow at you, “Until you’re blessed with black plague, I doubt you’ll die because of whatever sickness you have.”

“God, can you stop being that infuriating for once?” you snapped bitterly. “I’ve done every possible research on the subject and I know I’m doomed, okay?” 

A silence took place between the two of you. You whipped away tears that had gathered at the corner of your eyes. It was the first time you had admitted it out loud ; it hurt more than you thought. 

“I’m sorry to hear about your condition,” said Wednesday quietly ; and now matter how surprised you were by her words, you still thanked her quietly. “Does a cure exist?”

“Not that I’m aware of,” you muttered. “It…healing doesn’t depend on me.” At her frown, you lightly shrugged. “Flowers are growing in my lungs because of unrequited romantic feelings,” you explained quietly. “Eventually, I’ll either die from internal bleeding or choking.” 

This time, it was her turn to scoff, “You’re plagued with a deadly disease because you have feelings for someone? You just gave me the final proof that feelings are indeed useless, thank you.”

“I don’t fucking need your sarcasm,” you seethed, “if you want to be a stone-cold bitch that’s on you, but no need to mock me for having actual feelings. I didn’t choose this.” 

She looked at you closely, like she was trying to figure out something. Which she apparently did rather quickly: “It’s Xavier, isn’t it? He’s the one you have…feelings for.” 

You turned your face away, licking your lips. Wednesday was really the last person you wanted to have this conservation with. 

“You’re getting weak and you’re losing your powers because you have feelings for a meaningless man,” she repeated. “I thought you were better than that.”

“Fuck off Wednesday,” you cried, finally reaching your breaking point. “I’m not asking to understand, I’m not even asking you to be compassionate but shit, for once in your life be respectful of someone’s privacy.”

With that, you turned away and rushed into the corridors. You didn’t want to hate Wednesday, she had done nothing to you ; even regarding Xavier’s feelings, you were confident that her arrival hadn’t triggered your condition. Maybe it had accelerated it, but sooner or later Xavier would have fallen in love with someone else, and you would have been doomed anyway. So yeah, you didn’t want to hate Wednesday Addams ; but she definitely didn’t make things easy. 

A little less than an hour later, you found yourself walking through the school’s woods. The heated discussion with Wednesday had strangely given you enough courage to go and find Xavier, and finally explain everything to him. Weakened by your feelings? My ass! you thought. You were going to tell what was going on with you to Xavier, and to hell with the consequences on your friendship. 

You soon reached his artist shed in the middle of the woods. Its reassuring aura made you a little more at ease than the very public space of the Weathervane. Knocking on the door, you waited for Xavier to answer you. When he opened the door, you let out a loud gasp at the wound on his neck. 

“Holy shit, what happened to you?” you asked while pushing him back inside immediately before coming in. You immediately went to take a look at his bleeding jaw, carefully tilting his chin to the side. 

“Just an accident with a painting, nothing too bad,” he tried to reassure you. 

“Nothing bad? Xavier, you have claw marks bleeding on your neck, this isn’t some small scratch!” 

You could see that he was trying to brush it away, but you forced him to sit on a stool while you inspected the extent of his injuries. It didn’t look so bad, you could probably do something about it. Carefully dragging your fingers on the outlines of the claw marks you whispered a healing spell. The bleeding gradually stopped, and the cells of the skin started to slowly repair themselves. Though it started here, and the marks were still here looking like fresh scars. You gritted your teeth in frustration. With the full extent of your powers, you could have probably healed him completely. 

“That should do,” you muttered with a small smile. 

“Thanks,” he smiled back. “So,” he said after a few seconds of silence, “guess we need to talk, uh?” 

“Yeah,” you chuckled awkwardly, “guess we do.”

You fidgeted with your sleeve, toying with words in your mind. It was always more difficult to launch a subject when the time had come. 

“I’m not doing well,” you said, trying to resume the discussion where it had been left out back at the Weathervane, “and I’m not sure if I can really get better…on my own.”

Xavier leaned forward, fully focused on the matter. “How can I help you?”

You almost wanted to cry. He wanted so much to help you while having no idea of how bad the situation was. 

“This is…kind of complicated to talk about,” you hesitated. But to your surprise, Xavier gently took your hand into one of his bigger ones. 

“Hey,” he called softly, “you know you can tell me anything, right?” 

After a slight hesitation, you nodded slowly. Yet words didn’t seem to come out of your mouth. You started to open your mouth to finally confess, but something caught your eye. A large canvas hung on an easel, all in black and white tones. Like pulled by the invisible force of curiosity you slowly approached it, your hand slipping away from Xavier’s. As you approached and noticed who was painted you felt your heart sink into your chest. The painted figure of Wednesday playing her cello was taunting you, and it painfully reminded you of that night in Xavier’s room, when he had started to sketch it. It reminded you that you had no chance. 

Xavier called out for you from behind. But when you turned back to him, he was met with the look of your teary eyes. 

“You see, that’s why I can’t tell you,” you whispered sadly, “I can’t spoil this from you.” 

“What are you talking about?” he frowned. 

“This,” you said, gesturing at the portrait, “I can’t ruin your happiness with my burden, Xav.”

“Y/N please,” he said getting up, “please tell me what’s going on.” 

You shook your head, defeated. “I can’t,” you whispered weakly. “Sorry I- I got to go.” 

Before Xavier could react you slipped away and rushed outside of the shed. Tears were running down your cheeks but you couldn’t care less. It was clear that you could never interfere in Xavier’s feelings for Wednesday, so why bother saying anything to him at all? You heard him call you as soon as you had crossed the door but you didn’t dare to turn back and face him. He managed to grab your wrist when you were barely a few meters away from the shed. 

“Please don’t shut me out,” he begged you. You still couldn’t face him on your own, so he gently tucked on your hand, turning you to him. “Please Y/N, tell me what’s going on with you, ‘cause I can guess on my own.” 

Hesitantly, you looked up at him. Even though your eyes were blurry because of tears, you couldn’t help yourself but lose yourself in the admiration of his face. His brown eyes, so deep and full of compassion, his sharp features framed by soft hazel eyes…you wanted to print this image in your mind for however long you had still to live. Just like that night in his room, your eyes flickered to his lips. This time you didn’t hesitate, and you leaned forward and pressed your lips against his. 

He flinched slightly, for the first second. But then he surprised himself thinking how soft your lips felt against his own. 

You stayed like this for long seconds. Keeping your eyes closed and savouring the moment, you then realized that Xavier wasn’t moving at all. Biting back the bitter feeling within your guts, you slowly parted from him. Xavier simply stood up there frozen in place ; not understanding why you had kissed him so suddenly. At his lack of reaction and dumbfounded expression, you wanted to cry again so badly. Instead, you looked up at him.  

“I wanted to do that at least once,” you whispered. No matter how you had tried to keep them at bay, tears were flooding down your cheeks now. 

Still stuck down in place, Xavier didn’t know what to say. But the face of his best friend, teared apart by pain and sadness, was already too much to handle for him. 

“I- I’m sorry Y/N,” he muttered, “I don’t…I like you, I truly do but…but not like this.” 

Through your tears, you tried to smile ; it was a pathetic attempt. “Yeah…I know,” you whispered weakly.

It would have been easier if you had the ability to vanish away on the spot. It would have made you avoid moving away from Xavier and returning to the school painfully slowly, each of your steps burdened by the weight of your broken heart and the knowledge that Xavier hadn’t even tried to stop you. It would also have saved you from running into Wednesday once again, and hearing her asking Xavier out for the ball in the distance. It would have. 

But you couldn’t vanish, instead, you were here shedding every tear you had along bloodied flowers, not even trying to stop either of them. 

You just had your heart shattered into a million pieces and the confirmation that there was no hope for you. You were doomed, and the flowers growing inside of your lungs would soon reach your body’s breaking point.

[Part.5] 

A/N:  Thanks everyone for your incredible support, I hope you enjoyed this part ♥

Hope you’re all doing okay, take care of you ♥

Taglist: 

(no need to ask at every chapter, you're added once, and you're added for the whole fic :D)

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[grcnseer]

Amongst Wind & Sand ➢ Erryk Cargyll : Prologue

synopsis :: As the Dance of Dragons begins you, the eldest daughter of Princess Rhaenyra Targaryen, are trapped within the walls of the Red Keep and make an unsuspected ally amongst a sea of green.

pairing: Erryk Cargyll x Velaryon!Reader

warning(s): none really

note: After not seeing any work for Ser Erryk I decided to do it myself! This will be a series so if you’d like to be tagged in future parts just ask. This will be updated slowly as I’m working on another series that I’ve had planned for a while. Of course likes, reblogs & comments are always welcome. Enjoy!

It had been a mistake to stay in King’s Landing whilst the rest of your family returned to Dragonstone. 

Your mother had protested vehemently, worry shining in her eyes as you fought to convince her. As your eldest it is my duty to represent in your absence, you had countered, it would be a sign of good faith. Though it wasn’t until Daemon soothed her worries, assuring her that her return would be swift on dragonback, that she relented.

Jacaerys had offered to stay behind and you couldn’t help but laugh at his deep frown. He had always had a protective streak, but it rarely made an appearance on your behalf. The laughter caught him off guard and earned you an elbow to the side before he pulled you into a hug. Your younger brothers followed, wrapping their arms around you until they were shooed away. Rhaena and Baela quickly pecked your cheeks.

Rhaenyra Targaryen was every bit the queen she was meant to be, but at that moment, with a pinched brow and reluctant steps, she was only a mother. Her embrace was tighter than you could ever recall, though her voice did not tremble as she spoke— I’m very proud of you. You couldn’t help but smile when she reached for her husband, grasping his arm while he assured that if trouble found you they would all return.

There was a childish burst of excitement once you had said farewell. It had been years since you spent time within the Red Keep and despite the nature of your families’ departure, you had fond memories there. Intending to take full advantage of the freedom that came with the title of envoy, you took the long route to your chambers, the soft clammer of armor as your guard fell into step easing any worry you could have.

A soft shuffle echoed through the corridor and you peaked into the private dining hall. The maids were scurrying to clean the remnants of your disastrous family dinner. You could help but frown at the reminder, picking up your pace to escape it altogether. 

The winding stairwell was the only thing separating you from your chambers, but as you turned the corner you were brought to a sudden halt. A solid frame collided with your own, the sheer speed of their gate being enough to steal your balance. There was a sharp inhale and heavy hands grasped for your arms, enveloping you in warmth and steadying you on your feet.

You barely caught sight of a sandy beard before the knight bowed in sympathies. “Forgive me, princess.”

“It was my fault, I was lost in thought.” You assured him with a soft smile and the knight rose to his full height. Your gaze lifted to meet his, giving you the chance to examine his features. 

It had been some time since you laid eyes upon the Cargyll twins. During your childhood, your siblings would make a game of telling them apart and you had always reigned victorious. Their differences were faint and barely noticeable less you took the time to map them out. 

His cheekbones were soft and the large breadth of his brow spurred a knowing smile to your lips. “You look well, Ser Erryk.”

“As do you, princess.” You didn’t miss the bemused glint in his eyes as he let them wonder for the briefest moment. Had you not been so focused on his features you would have missed it. “Your time in Dragonstone has become you.”

Heat flooded your chest as you flushed under his gaze, quickly breaking your gaze with a cough. “I must say, I wasn’t expecting to run into anyone at this hour.” You resisted the urge to jape at how you had quite literally run into him.

His lips quirked in amusement, but it did not linger. “Yes, Prince Aegon has taken to nightly walks.”

Murmurs of your uncle's unsavory tastes had been brought to Dragonstone. You had overheard your mother and stepfather whisper between themselves about his behavior. However, you couldn’t be sure if it was well known or if it had simply been passed along by Daemon’s spies. It made you grateful for the lack of politicking on the island. 

“Well, I wish you the best of luck finding him.” You smiled softly, hoping for his sake the prince had lost himself in his cups and passed out somewhere within the keep. “Perhaps Ser Payten could assist you?” 

At the mention of your guard, his gaze shifted over your shoulder, taking note of the younger knight. There was only the briefest nod of acknowledgment before his focus turned back to you. “You’re too kind, princess, but I wouldn’t leave you unprotected in the Keep.”

“Then I bid you goodnight, Ser Erryk.” You worried at your bottom lip before risking, “I hope to see you again before I return home.”

There was a slight glint to his narrowed gaze as if he were testing the weight of your words. “I hope the same. Goodnight, princess.”

You didn’t spare him another glance until his steps echoed throughout the hall, watching his form retreat the way you came. Ser Payten met you with a raised brow and he didn’t bother hiding his amusement as you shot him a glare. Before you could slip into your chambers he broke the silence.

“A Kingsguard? Truly?” 

A groan broke past your lips at his teasing tone and you avoided his gaze as you slipped into the room and slammed the door. You hurried to your vanity, plucking your jewelry off as you pushed down the hot embarrassment creeping up your spine. While you could recall your girlish fancies on Ser Erryk you had never expected it to come back with a vengeance at the sight of him.

You rolled your eyes at your own naivety. 

It was simply the wine, you assured, remembering the heavy gulp you had taken when the night started to go awry, nothing more and nothing less.

[greenteadumplings]

What are your most heart-wrenching and heart-warming Bad Buddy moments?

Hi anon. There r many such moments for me in this show. But for the sake of this post, I'm gonna go with 5 for each.

Heart-Wrenching:

5. Unresolved Guitar Scene

I mean just see his face. He saved that guitar for 3 years. Probably his only physical connection to Pran during his depressingly lonely days. He saw that Guitar as a thing between him and Pran, only to find out that Pran gave that Guitar to Wai. We as audience know what happened and why Pran gave it to Wai for safekeeping. But Pat never did and he had to find out about it hiding behind a couch while Wai gets to sit on that same couch so easily. All of that and that issue never gets addressed. I was so confused when they meet of rooftop again and it's like the memory of this is erased. I waited the whole episode before I finally had to accept that it won't be resolved. Poor baby. I wish It was handled properly.

4. Hopeful Iced Milk Tea Date

This scene hits hard for me because of the scene before it. The scene where Pran is waiting for his milk tea at the stand and Pat casually says that he will see him in music room. His fond smile while ordering another tea for Pat and his little shy expression. It may be a small thing, but when u r not allowed to even speak with someone, sharing an iced milk tea feels like a privilege. And we can exactly see the moment where his hope gets shattered. And he didn't even have the heart to drink the tea he ordered for himself either.☹️

3. Pat in pain

My heart can't handle sunshine golden retriever Pat Napat Jindapat breaking down in pain like that. He just found out that, his father the person he's been admiring his whole life, the person he saw as his hero, is the reason for the fued. He did something so horrible which hurt Pran's mother which in turn hurt Pran. His whole life must have felt like a lie. And yet here he is, trying to stay strong for Pran's sake but silently breaking down when Pran can't see him. That single tear running down his face while he fought to keep the others haunted me for days.

2. THE ROOFTOP

@inventedfangirling mentioned in this post that telivision peaked here, and I can't agree more. I'm a permanent resident of the rooftop sharing it with other Bad Buddy refugees. There are many moments in these five minutes where we can feel our heart getting wrecked. But what gets me every time is the difference in their expressions right after the kiss. Pat being happy, relieved. Him finally understanding many things about him and their relationship. Pran being devastated, being sure that if he doesn't stop now, then he will surely drown in his own tears. Both of them leaving the rooftop with broken hearts, broke my heart.

1. Pain in Pain

Pran's love for Pat might have started as something small in his heart. But it grew and grew during the years until his heart felt heavy with it. So heavy to the point where it must have felt like a burden. But a burden he want to carry willing just because it's Pat. Then Pat goes on and adds more weight to his already heavy heart. But Pat didn't know it. He doesn't know he's hurting Pran and thats the worst part. He can't even be mad about it. So he suffers silently, because it's the only thing he can do, the only thing he's been doing for years. Pran softly watching Pat with eyes full of tears and shaking his head as if to wake himself from a daydream never fails to break my heart.

Heart-Warming:

Before we go into this I want to say that picking just five had been one of the toughest decisions I had to make. There are many other ones that I absolutely love and wanted to include. But for the sake of this post I included these 5.

5. Forehead Kiss

I'm a sucker for forehead kisses and this one just so soft so tender and so simple it leaves me breathless. Pran in his childhood bed room, on his own bed where he yearned for Pat all his childhood, with his guitar and Pat who is in love with him has honestly healed me a bit. This whole scene followed by the tin can conversation and the scene cutting to their childhood, it's just *chefs kiss. No wonder it won the best scene award.

4. Boyfriends holding hands on a bench

No matter how many times I watch this it won't fail to give me butterflies. Pat offering to stage a break up for the sake of Pran. Pran gently taking away his hand to stop him. And then! And then he goes and holds Pat's hand below the table!!! Pran initiating more and more physical contact with Pat as the show progress letting himself have things he wished he did when he was in high school just makes me so happy.

3. First time on Beach

Episode 11 is one of my favorite episode. It starts with a sad bus ride gradually lightening the mood and hits us with speeches given in pseudo wedding attires, our song and 'good luck, buddy' without giving us any time to breath. The whole episode has a underlined theme of sadness lurking just beneath the surface. In the midst of all that this scene just feels so full of love. At this moment nothing else matters but just them. Just them soaking in their love and being with each other. And what feels like freedom than being with the love of ur life and basking in each other's presence.

2. Show me your dimples

If I had to show a person a scene from this series in order for them to watch this I will show them this particular balcony scene. Whenever I rewatch this, I will be buzzing with happiness. No but, the acting, lighting, background music makes this scene one of the best in the series. The way Pran tries to cheer up Pat and Pat laughing happily, virtual hugs and scented t shirts, cute ear phone cases and them being in love with each other and doing silly things. It can't get better than this. Whenever I watch this scene I feel like I'm somehow intruding them. It's feels so natural and realistic.

1. The Guitar Pick

Here we not only see how Pran fell in love but we can also understand why. Simple gestures as this, done without much thought tells us so much about a person. Pat cutting his student ID for Pran, Pran's look while taking the pick, Pat's soft chuckles, Prans fond smile, the innocence of first love. It's just so simple yet I makes u feel warm from inside. I just love this moment so much. The golden lighting their gazes and the soft music everything makes it feel so warm and fuzzy.

[twentyghosts]

Fandom:  Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)

Relationships:  Bruce Banner/Tony Stark, past Pepper Potts/Tony Stark, minor Clint Barton/Natasha Romanov

Characters: Bruce Banner, Tony Stark, James Rhodes, Pepper Potts, Clint Barton, Natasha Romanov

Words: 22k

Summary: When Pepper calls off their winter wedding, Tony decides to take their planned honeymoon anyway. He's excited to show his best man Rhodey the Italian castle he has fond childhood memories of, but the trip gets off to a rocky start when Tony nearly runs over the groundskeeper with his flashy rental car. Fortunately: the groundskeeper, Bruce, is uninjured--and hot. Unfortunately: he's not immediately convinced that a holiday fling with Tony Stark could be just the thing both of them are looking for.

---

I wrote this for @kalika999's prompt for @marveltrumpshate! I meant to have it posted earlier in time for peak Hallmark Holiday season but true love knows no season, right? Anyway thank you Kali for the prompt! Thank you @trammelsb & @bpdtomwambsgans for beta reading & handholding!

[hellonerf]

this strawpage... @_@ anon ok i love thinking alot abt 1p&2p caname now how they'd all interact with each other (all a ruse to drive the two canames closer together as most things are) conjuring things in my mind now

funnily enough i think 1Pcana 2Pame is actually likely to go well together haha.... maybe at first cana is like wow (T_T) hes even more of an asshole than the ame i know... then blablabla WHAT?! he is being sincere transparent ?!?!?!?! the bewilderment of seeing a version of ur brother without his constant effort into projecting a specific image... i think cana is always. a little fascinated by these kinds of moments from ame but its moments he has to wrestle out of or comes after a kind of peak of things building up... and here it just comes out of this new ame?! without prompting?!? only awhile after they just met?!?! so heres the little weird bonding theyd have afterwards... easing of first impression hostilities.... and 2Pame is like haha a polite cana can u imagine... haha lol... haha hes sooo nicer and accomodates to me hahaa.. (looks down at feet).... then theyre projecting images of their dear brother with more agreeable behaviors into the other hahaha i love it.... both going if only he was this likeable!

even so i love base caname so in my mind this still comes to a head like... well you cant replace the bond and shared memories here... and i think 2Pame especially is more anxious or fidgety that this cana doesn't know the same things the other does... ohh hes nicer (missing the kind of specific care he needs)(looks around nervously) and 1Pcana is just not used to how this ame is... unable to talk to him about his little grievances... or joke about the same things they hate... this ame wont just sleep in the couch with me... (7_7) what will they do now?!

on the opposite end i think 1Pame and 2Pcana would just not like each other LOL i think i mentioned them before, finding what they could be interesting. i still find them interesting but in the way that i really dont think theyd get along and its really funny to me. just from first impression theyre like i dont like this guy... and then upon spending more time theyre like i REALLY dont like this guy... from 1Pame specifically i think hes just someone who doesnt mesh well with tough or more hostile demeanor guys i think... he doesnt like accomodating people and hes definitely not interested in this. this jerk?! (he was also kindof a jerk). especially since he looks like cana... i think he can deal with people who are colder like that if there is a semblance of attention or affection there.. with this new cana hes like u wont be nice to me and u wont even pay attention to me. (kills him in his mind). meanwhile 2Pcana is like hes annoying (without the inherent fondness he'd have for his ame from their shared childhood) Lol...

i think theyd just butt heads all the time... nobody willing to give in... especially especially since they look like someone they love. 1Pames just like what the hell :( wheres my cana who puts his hand in his face all exasperated and then drives me to where i asked him to anyways :( what the hell :( kill this fake cana with flamethrowers now (gritting teeth). and 2Pcana also cant stand him hes like this fakeness... fake politeness... who is this for. why are u saying excuse me. hate this performative behavior... (throws cigarette in his face). its like the worst traits of their loved one was put to the max... theyre like. sick of this guy already...

in my beautiful world ofcourse this makes the canames be like ok... so i love my... not his others... i just love him! all canames are beautiful and really funny and fun and cute! thank you anon idk if u'll end up seeing my ranting or if ur from twitter and not tumblr... but its really fun for me...

[sadistic-softie]

*yelling so loudly into a shitty microphone that it cuts and peaks several times* I FUCKING LOVE DOCTORS!!!!

Actually, on a more genuine note, doctors have been the biggest support in my life both in physical AND mental health. They practically raised me. I have more positive and fond childhood memories of being in doctors offices and hospitals than of total ones in my own home. They talked to me like a person, listened to me vent, gave me life advice, supported me, were always gentle, offered hugs and comfort, remembered little things about me, genuinely cared, and they were just generally always there for me wherever and wherever my mother wasn't. Because of that, I have a deep emotional soft spot for doctors. If I could, I would say thank you so so much to all of the doctos in my life who support/supported me, especially the one who saved my life several times. I love them like family<333

[kenobihater]

liking tcw is like. yes i have fond childhood memories of it. yes it is bad. yes it's in my top three fave star wars stories. yes it isn't peak star wars. yes ahsoka is the highlight of the show. yes there is not NEARLY enough clone content in the fucking CLONE WARS show. yes i think dave filoni deserves for his cowboy hat to blow away in the wind. yes it's my fave depiction of obi-wan. yes there are dropped subplots and annoying ass characters (hello zillo beast? hello saltine krust?). yes, the politics are whack. yes, it compels me. no, i would not recommend it. hope this helps <3

[genlossneg]

Any short film or media project can be submitted to film festivals pretty much off the bat so long as you appropriately own all the copyrighted material or have permission to use it

There's hundreds of smaller film festivals that ranboo could've submitted genloss too, including film festivals with focuses on experimental media like genloss is. But ranboo ran straight for an Emmy, the cream of the crop and literally nowhere else

It's both a mix of a massive ego and ignorance. Obviously I go to film school so this information was given to me by professors and it was discussed pretty extensively in class, but if Ranboo was genuinely trying to make genloss into anything, I don't think it's crazy to assume he should've submitted genloss to these film festivals that are much more in the lane of what genloss is

Also what peeves me off is because film makers have a crazy stupid amount of passion. I'm surrounded by them in my classes, my profs, we learn about them. And most of these people also have huge egos, and honestly what I've found is that very rarely can this ego be backed up by any substance.

But at the very least, they have an ego and they're trying to do something with it and actively putting in so many hours

Ranboo quite simply hasn't put in any time to make genloss, much like his extraordinarily misplaced budget, he didn't use his time where he shouldn've (don't worry one day I'll jump into your inbox and talk about the incredibly misplaced budget)

The way my particular program works is we all produce a short film at the end of each semester. We get a crew and actors and locations all on a college student budget and one of my classmates actually submitted their work for a film festival and got nominated for their category (very proud of them)

I didn't because I know my film wasn't very good. Am I proud of it, yes! I'm insanely happy with how it came out. But I have the self-awareness to know overall, it isn't this amazing thing that everyone needs to know about

Ranboo lacks this self-awareness, which along with any art, is absolutely critical for growth. Ranboo has never spoken about how he wishes he had done genloss differently or any regrets he had (aside from time crunch or things they couldn't make work) and that's how I know he didn't actually learn anything from this first run of genloss

Because the reality is, genloss wasn't good. And like my film, Ranboo can be proud of what he did as well as critical of the final product

An artist should always be their own worst critic because then they can see what the did wrong and then try and improve

Ranboo's biggest problems from my very limited perspective is a lack of understanding of how to tell a story, the lack of a backbone. He rushed genloss for an arbitrary reason. The production management was a joke too

To go for an Emmy, you're saying you think you are good enough for the highest prestige and that you believe that you've put in the appropriate amount of time and hours and that your work is worthy of gaining international recognition. And if Ranboo submitted it for the meme, that makes it worse. It shows his complete and utter lack of respect for the craft

Now, do bad movies exist, yes. Do I love some bad movies, also yes. But never have you heard of these directors hyping up these movies the way Ranboo has. And yeah, sometimes movies are cashgrabs. But again, the attitude ranboo carries as the director of genloss rubs me and so many other people so wrong as well as the attitude of boobers who think genloss is peak media. I can easily admit a movie I really like is objectively terrible but I still find enjoyment but boobers would flay you for daring say genloss isn't good (shout out live action Scooby Doo movies. They're absolutely terrible but they're fun to watch and I have fond memories of them from my childhood)

Apologies for the essay

-film student anon

film student anon this essay is wonderful. theres so much here i don't think i could reply to it all, and i really appreciated your takes on film festivals and passion projects vs the emmys. some of my favorite bits:

There's hundreds of smaller film festivals that ranboo could've submitted genloss too, including film festivals with focuses on experimental media like genloss is. But ranboo ran straight for an Emmy, the cream of the crop and literally nowhere else

To go for an Emmy, you're saying you think you are good enough for the highest prestige and that you believe that you've put in the appropriate amount of time and hours and that your work is worthy of gaining international recognition.

so big brain here. i would just keep quoting your ask in my reply because you make a ton of great points of effort not equaling quality.

i think the thing that gets me is that your first try of something is never going to be perfect. even with all the practice in the world your first try always is a bit messy, and that's how you get experience. but by submitting it for an emmy, it implies this first try was perfect, or at least close enough to be considered for such a high award. and like.. it wasn't horrible but it certainly had flaws.

i'll be so curious to see what happens with all this when the nominees get announced and what the fandom does with whatever happens

[skaruresonic]

In truth, I've been feeling really sensitive about SA2 recently because I feel like I have to defend it on two fronts. "Give it more credit, it's more solidly constructed than you might think" and "Don't hype it into something it's not, you're raising people's expectations too high."

I don't want to make people feel as though they can't criticize the game because I know it has flaws. Maybe even enough flaws to turn people off the game entirely.

But between the swinging of the pendulum, "SA2 isn't all that and a bag of chips like people make it out to be" and "omg SA2 is peak aesthetic (forgets basic plot points)," all this has got me feeling rather foolish for having it as my favorite Sonic game.

I'm just worried that by arguing for the game's merits in addition to attempting to see it through a balanced lens, I'll get lumped in with nostalgia-blind fans who want Maria to get shot in glorious HD.

I won't lie: I have an attachment to the game because I've played it since childhood and have fond memories wrapped up in it. Don't we all with our faves? And I do have questionable taste sometimes, otherwise I wouldn't be an ShTH-loving heathen. But it really does seem like recently people are taking the game and trying to use it to make a point rather than taking it on its own merit or lack thereof. It bears the burden of proving to non-fans what Sonic can be, apparently, and that seems an awful lot to ask of a Dreamcast game.

and it's like. man, I just like the game. why does it have to bear an albatross around its neck

[jerry-for-the-win]

For some reason I can’t stop thinking of Susan Pensive, I imagine that even years after everything and years after forgetting she still gets scared at the first blow of winter and doesn’t quite know why. She figures it’s some unpleasant memory from childhood, she thinks nothing of it but for a split second at the beginning of each winter she feels fear.

I imagine she has dreams during winter where all she can remember is the color blue, a lion with sad yet fond eyes, and a crown perfectly shaped for her head.

I imagine when she opens a wardrobe there’s a spark, just a spark, of a memory. A flash of banquets and seas and animals and then it’s gone.

I imagine she always has a small feeling of not being home, of not being where she’s supposed to be. Some days she wakes up and feels as if she’s in the wrong bed but the feeling wears off as soon as it comes on.

I imagine there will always be a glimpse into Narnia within her, just a peak but never enough to truly see.

[hopefulromances]

Oooh that sounds like a cool game! #12+royjaime?

#12 Half Truths by Joseph

"Lights dim in this dark room Quick breaths, it'll end soon Just how many half-truths Do I have to Tell myself to get through?"

TW: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Mentions of Past Sexual Abuse, Panic Attacks, a little ooc whoops

It was happening again. Jamie felt himself slipping into that emotionless wasteland that he called his mind. He'd been talking with his dad again and it hadn't been bad but it hadn't exactly been good either. Dr. Shannon said it was hard reconnecting with an abuser and to be very careful with him.

And it was fine at first. Went to the family days, exchanged childhood memories with his dad, heard the apologizes he'd practiced. But now, It was like a darkness had started to come back between them. Jamie felt like he was trying to make his dad be something he wasn't, trying to make up for lost years.

But James just wasn't that person. It wasn't fair to him and it wasn't fair to Jamie and Jamie knew it. He could feel his father's failures piling on him when he remembered all the times that he didn't show up. Then one day his dad brought up Amsterdam like it was a fond memory. When Jamie reminded him that it wasn't exactly that fond for him, James insisted that there had to be something good about it. Some good memory from that time, it wasn't all bad.

But Jamie had started remembering. Those repressed memories from that night of the lady and her hands on his body. That's what he remembered from that trip. But his dad insisted that it wasn't all bad.

Anyways, Jamie was slipping. His father failing his standards, his own body failing his standards. He was slipping.

It came to a peak one day when Declan smacked his ass unexpectedly. It shouldn't have been unexpected, this behavior was common practice in the locker room, but for some reason, it scared Jamie. He yelped and fell backwards, schooching back against the median.

The locker room fell silent as they stared at Jamie. He was shaking, his arms shaking, his back shaking, his legs shaking.

Deep Breaths, he thought, it's just a memory it'll pass. Hands touching his arms, his back, his legs. It'll end soon, you're fine.

"You're okay, Jamie." Roy's voice was husky in his ear. "Take my hand, squeeze it." Jamie found Roy's hand right in front of him. Squeezing it hard. He vaguely heard Roy grunt in pain. "That's it, I'm here."

Roy continued to speak comforting words into Jamie's ear as he came back down to earth, the shaking stopping, the hands disappearing. He was in the locker room, he was safe. And, most importantly, he was with Roy.

"There you go, just breath," Roy hummed. "You back, babe?"

Jamie nodded, rolling his neck. Then he let go of Roy's hand and hopped up off the ground. "Thanks, matey, see ya at 4 ya?"

"Where the fuck do you think you're going?" Roy barked, standing with a loud crack from his knee.

"Home, ya? Trainin's over, innit?" Jamie grabbed his bag and threw it over his shoulder.

"Jamie you just had a fucking panic attack and called me 'matey' you think I'm just gonna fucking let you go home?" Roy looked so cross with Jamie. If he didn't know him well enough he'd think he was angry. But Jamie knew more than anything he was just scared, worried about Jamie. "You've been leaving early, running ahead of me, avoiding the press. It's happening again."

God, he wished his didn't know every inch of Roy's mind and that Roy didn't know his. Jamie twisted the signet ring on his finger,sucking half his bottom lip into his mouth.

"Been seeing my dad, ain't I?" Jamie huffed out a laugh. "He was talking with me about... about Amsterdam."

"Jamie--"

"He said it couldn't have been that bad, and maybe he's right... ya know maybe it wasn't-"

"Jamie, stop," Roy was at his side in an instant, taking Jamie's hands in his. "Jus' stop."

Jamie looked down at their hands, squeezing on and off, trying to gain some symbalance of confidence.

"Amsterdam was not okay, what he made you do was not okay," Roy insisted, lower his head to catch Jamie's eyes. "None of it was okay."

Jamie nodded, feeling like a kid being told off by their teacher. He rocked forward, knocking his head against Roy's.

"Most importantly, Jamie, you're a strong fucking lad," Roy reminded him. "Stronger than anyone else in this club. And you are going to prove your dicksleeve of a father wrong. But... but you can't fade away on me again."

"I can only help you if you let me. And I want to help, I won't go easy on you but I'll try and fucking help," Roy ran a hand through Jamie's hair. "At least let me condition your hair."

Jamie chuckled, scratching his scalp. "Yeah, I can do that."

"Good, now get your shoes on I want to go on another run before nightfall," Roy turned Jamie around and pushed him lightly towards his cubby.

Jamie turned and saluted before grabbing his trainers. Yeah he was slipping, but Roy was there to catch him when he fell.