#ponyo do you think I have a chance

[1v31182m5]

Renders

[fairytale-poll]

ROUND 1B, MATCH 6 OUT OF 8!

Propaganda Under the Cut:

Sayaka:

It's a clever play on the story where, rather than the littlest becoming human for love and a soul, instead she becomes a mermaid after loosing both, even gaining the bittersweet ending of having a chance at heaven but she still needs to do good after death

i was surprised to learn that sayaka's story is based on the little mermaid, but it makes more sense the more i think about it. such a heartbreaking, tragic tale that i get emotional ocer every time.

A lot of Madoka Magica fans believe she is based off of the original Little Mermaid story cuz, just like the original Little Mermaid, Sayaka loved a boy and said boy did not reciprocate. SPOILERS, she makes a contract with Kyubey to become a magical girl and in return her wish was to help Kyosuke (the guy she likes) who was disabled. Later on when she becomes a witch cuz she felt she wasn't good enough for Kyosuke and doesn't tell him about her feelings, her witch form is a mermaid. I suck at explaining but I hope my propaganda helps 🙏

(Major spoilers for madoka magical)Okay so I will admit her allusion to the little mermaid ain't super obvious, but let me explain, she is based on the original story for the little mermaid, she makes a wish for the sake of a boy she loves basically sacrificing her soul, well he ends up in love with another girl, and as a result she ends up going on a downward spiral and transforms into a monster known as a witch, her witch form is a mermaid.

Even though she's not a mermaid outside her witch form, her story is made to be a direct parallel to the self-sacrificial nature of the little mermaid, even letting herself die. This isn't the end tho because in one of the happier endings of the little mermaid she still becomes sea foam/dies but she also has a chance at becoming a sea spirit and helps others, this is very similar to Sayaka's final fate in the anime where after Madoka rewrites the universe Sayaka still gets corrupted/dies but instead of becoming a witch, she becomes apart of the law of cycles and helps Madoka save other magical girls. There are way to many similarities to her story and the little mermaid for it to just be coincidence imo.

Poor girl is stuck in a craptastic world where horrible monsters kill you, the only way to fight back is to become a zombie child soldier killing what remains of your own kind for survival, the wish you made will inevitably blow up in your face because the person granting it is a jackass, and the writer is hellbent on shitting on the girl power ethos of the magical girl genre by making it so that girls suffer and die for trying to achieve reasonable desires like "not starving to death" and attaining agency in their lives dooms you even harder because of womanly emotions. She needs a win. Also, she is explicitly paralleled with The Little Mermaid--she is a tragic figure who makes a deal to help the boy she loves in exchange for putting her life on a ticking clock, only to be passed up in favor of another girl. As a result, she dies and becomes something else--in this case, Oktavia von Seckendorff, "the mermaid witch."

Ponyo:

determined 5yo girls are more powerful than god

PONYO!!!!

As a child i did not even realize this was a little merm adaptation, but it really reads. She is sooo strange and other worldly and the movie absolutely captures that dreamlike fairy tale vibe

Ponyo a roughly five-year-old magical goldfish who can transform into a frog-type thing and a human girl. She's the eldest daughter of the literal goddess of the sea and a former human sailor given immortality. She falls in love with the five-year-old boy who cares for her and is thrilled to explore his ordinary yet magical world. She's bouncy, exuberant, and joyful. She loves ham. She doesn't have to give up her voice.

ponyo ponyo ponyo little fishie in the sea!

Little fishy

THEY LOVE HAM

[aisaariel]

how does jk feel about his solo 7?

ponyo deck ; tarot & intuition ; july 20, 2023

hello vitas! i felt called to do this reading, so i popped out my new ponyo theme deck and did this reading. ponyo is a feisty one and the deck is straightforward, so i'm excited to work with the deck now and in the future! let's get started~

— 10w (6c), 5p (3c), Aw (Kp), 7w (Ac) // 10c

context: so let's first talk about his previous project with charlie puth, left and right. his part of the song goes, "ever since the day you went away (someone tell me how), how much more do i gotta drink for the pain? (whatcha gon' do now?), you do things to me that i just can't forget (now all i think about), are the nights we were tangled up in your bed" with the prechorus and chorus following. and then in seven, he talks about f*cking someone right in the explicit version and loving someone right in the clean version. very obvious in the music video! he explained 7 talks about doing whatever you can to be with the love of your life. this happens to provide great context for the reading.

about the song: now to what the actual cards are telling us. seeing how we start off with the ten of wands clarified by the six of cups, we see how he has spent lots of time on this song and really considered what kind of message it would bring to people who listened to it. he chose to have an explicit version and a clean version. he chose to make the songs give off the messages and vibes that they did. i think this song is an amalgamation of his view of love, his tendencies as a lover in relationships, his past relationships, his dynamics with past lovers, and such! he drew upon lots of his past it seems.

his feelings: then, we see him talking more about his thoughts. it's like he's saying "i can be your companion through your darkest troubles, look you in the eyes, see through to the deepest depths of your soul. i want to help you feel better. i want to love you, hold you tight. i want to show you that anything is possible, show you the light in the darkness, lead you to the right path. i want to make tons of mistakes with you because i know you won't judge me and i won't judge you. i want to support you in your ventures in any way that i can, be your provider, your defender, and your greatest lover. then we see the seven of swords clarified by the ace of cups. "why is it that i give you all of me but you hurt me in the end? why do you not love me, give all of you back to me? i'll follow you wherever you go; you can't get rid of me. i know you love me back. i'll wait for you until you feel comfortable and ready. baby, just look back at me once. give me a chance, give me a sign, and i'll never leave your side." (listen to "all of me" john legend)

other(?) channeled stuff: that was a huge storm of words up there and i was not present half the time that i was writing it because jk seemed very eager to explain what his song meant. so essentially, we go travel all~~~~ the way back in time to the times when he was really struggling in love. the time frame feels around 2017 or 2018? so many betrayals, so much hurting. "why is it that no matter how much love i give to you, you keep hurting me? why do you make me feel special and then break me?" and "why do i keep falling back into love with you when i know that i'll just be hurt in the end?" i don't really want to look into the specifics, but it seems like he experienced a very unhealthy relationship - the energy of this person he was in a relationship with feels older than him. it seems like he gave his all and did his best, but in the end he felt hurt, used, unheard, and unloved. he did everything that he could in his position: listening, supporting, understanding, buying presents, quality time, etc. however, what he got in return may have been coldness, lots of complaints. he may have loved this person a lot more than how much this person loved him back. i don't really know why, but it feels like this person didn't even love him back at all. like i sense this person just grinning and chuckling at his innocence in a way, when really, they were there for his fame and his body and face (bragging rights). okay i need to stop here. no more SHUSH AISA, SHUSH!!!!!!

answering the actual question: so, to finally answer the actual question that this whole post was based on, it seems like this is kind of like a "period mark" to any of what happened in the past. i see him starting new. i see him just wanting pure happiness. a happy life, a happy home, a happy family with those he loves. the song really fully encompasses how he is as a lover. he's someone who gives his all to someone he loves. he's willing to give his all. he won't leave you alone. he'll follow you around, shower you with love, show you all of him and in turn, want to know all of you. when i watched the music video and read the lyrics, i was just extremely shocked for certain reasons that i cannot share, but the representation of his lyrics in the music video hits straight to home base pretty much! he worked very hard for this single in particular and i think it really contains lots of him in regards to love. he feels very proud of it and he's happy to share it with the world. he also seems to be moving on now from past things. he's looking to a newer person, a newer perspective. this is a transitional point for him and a lot of baggage was released on his part! there was also a lot of maturing as well, so he really really worked hard on himself. this is why a lot of readers may have sensed that his energy is feeling much fresher and lighter nowadays because that's pretty much exactly what he did!

i apologize but don't apologize for this long essay. i had so much fun having jk take over most of what was written on this post!

[woosh-floosh]

Oh shoot! It’s the end of the year already!

~ ☆ MY FAVORITE THINGS 2023 ☆ ~

I don’t keep a journal of everything, for lack of a better term, ‘consume’ during the year so there is probably a chance that I might have missed something important. Possible new years resolution idea….

MOVIES

PUSS IN THE BOOTS: THE LAST WISH

An epic little movie about a cat accepting his own mortality.

SPIRITED AWAY

Excluding the fuzzy memories I have of watching Ponyo as a child, I have never watched a Ghibli movie before this year. Maybe I made a mistake watching what is viewed as Studio Ghibli’s magnum opus first. Every Ghibli movie I have watched after had me walking away thinking “this is good, but it’s no Spirited Away!”

PARASITE

It’s as good as everyone says it is, yeah.

ONE CUT OF THE DEAD

The “it gets good after 100 episodes” of movies. Recommending it to someone has the chance of ruining their trust in your taste forever.

THE DIRTIES

I could start a whole academic career focused solely around analyzing this movie.

OPERATION AVALANCHE

Like The Dirties if it was about faking the moon landing instead of planning a school shooting. The less depressing subject matter means more people will be willing to watch with you.

TV SHOWS

HOW TO WITH JOHN WILSON SEASON 3

The most honest depiction of humanity ever caught on film. There is an episode about vintage vacuum cleaner collectors that might make you cry.

NIRVANNA THE BAND THE SHOW

It’s funny.

TASKMASTER UK/NEW ZELAND/MINNESOTA

I <3 TASKMASTER!!!!!!!

GAME CHANGER

What do you do when you���re all caught up on Taskmaster? You watch Game Changer on Dropout.tv.

VIDEOS GAMES

PIZZA TOWER

I <3 PIZZA TOWER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

THE LEGEND OF ZELDA: TEARS OF THE KINGDOM

Despite some qualms I may have with the story and gameplay, I cannot deny that I logged 160 hours in this game in the span of like, a month.

SPLATOON 3

yeah

MUSIC

THE GO! TEAM - GET UP SEQUENCES PART 2

I don’t know why The Go! Team always releases their music in the dead of winter but it ends up being a wonderful little blip in my memory of an otherwise suffocating season.

FAVORITE TRACK: WHAMMY-O

LOVEJOY - WAKE ME UP WHEN IT’S OVER

Every new EP they sound different but it’s still good and it’s still Lovejoy!

FAVORITE TRACK: IT’S GOLDEN HOUR SOMEWHERE

HAMMER NO MORE THE FINGERS - SILVER ZEBRA

Sometimes when I am sad I remember that I live in the year that Hammer No More the Fingers released a new album after a twelve year hiatus and I am happy again.

FAVORITE TRACK: UNDERWATER PARTY MUSEUM and CRITTERS (TREASURE TIME)

PIZZA TOWER SOUNDTRACK - MR. SAUCEMAN, CLASCYJITTO, AND POST ELVIS

Finally, the spiritual successor to the Sonic CD (JPN/EU) soundtrack we’ve all been waiting for. Please release the halloween tracks for download soon!

FAVORITE TRACK: THERE’S A BONE IN MY SPAGHETTI!

THE WRENS

This band is awusome

PLEASE NOTE: These numbers are incomplete and do not account for the tracks not available on Spotify.

FAVORITE TRACK: YOU COULD NOT POSSIBLY MAKE ME CHOOSE

SINGLE TRACK LIGHTNING ROUND

BLACK BALLOONS - THE RARE OCCASIONS

PURE BLOOD - DAREHARU

BRAND NEW COLONY - THE BETHS AND PICKLE DARLING

SEVEN DAYS A WEEK/AH, MARIA - GODDAMN WOLVES

FROM THE START - GOOD KID

ELECTRICAL FORECAST - INABAKUMORI

25 OR 6 TO 4 - CHICAGO

THOUSANDS OF YEARS - LAST DINOSAURS

DONE DONE DONE - JEFF ROSENSTOCK

PSEUDUMBRA PHAUXTASM - MARCY NABORS AND JAMIE PAIGE

BEWARE THE FOREST’S MUSHROOMS (PIKMIN EDITION) - YOKO SHIMOMURA, SEASLUX, AND CAPRICEFRENATA

MISCELLANEOUS 

STRONG FEMALE CHARACTER - FERN BRADY

I think this was the only book I read this year. It’s crazy to read a book about an upbringing that was very different from mine but still have the feeling deep down that we are made of the same stuff (autism).

MAINTENANCE PHASE

A podcast that will make you view fatness, health, and academic research differently forever. I listened to the whole backlog of episodes while playing minecraft.

Thank you for reading! I hope you have a wonderful new year! 🎉🎆🎇🎉

[ooksaidthelibrarian]

tagged by @nannyoggskitchen

1. Are you named after anyone?

nope, although I picked my own name for a Victorian Call of Cthulhu character of mine

2. When was the last time you cried?

the last time I watched Ponyo because fuck me that is gorgeous animation and music

3. What’s your eye color?

brown

4. Scary movies or happy endings?

scary movie

5. Any special talents?

Speedreading search engine results, summaries and rewinding tapes the exact length of a song with a pencil or stabilo point pen

6. Where were you born?

small town in the Sauerland

7. What are your hobbies?

reading, writing, photography, drawing, gif making, gaming

8. Have you any pets?

I used to have so many but right now it's only a colony of hissing roaches and two phasmids at the library

9. What sports do you play/have played?

LOL

10. How tall are you?

163 cm

11. Favourite subject in school?

history

12. Dream job?

librarian, the one I have

13. Do you prefer owls, capybaras, or flamingos?

owls

14. What is your favourite soup?

pea soup (with pig ears or trotters if possible) or barley soup

15. What is your favourite…rock (idfk)?

fool's gold

16. Choose a familiar: 1) very dumb, very loving disobedient dog. He loves you but will never listen to you ever 2) a raven that speaks but it only ever shrieks the name of various fast food restaurants 3) a toad that screams like a teenage boy instead of croaks

no thank you

17. Which planet do you feel like would be kind of an asshole if you met them?

they are all awesome, what are you talking about

18. if you were a worm would you love me?

obviously

19. Least favourite type of clothing?

the kind I have to wear because people expect me to dress up for an event

20. You are now in a horror movie—so sorry. Chance of survival?

I'm small but angry so there's that

21. Would you rather: the ability to instantly grow a perfect mustache, or ability to talk to vegetables?

mustache, although talking to *trees* sounds really nice

22. What do you think of whales?

the world

[dranother-memory]

Yamato, do you have a favorite anime :0

"I haven't had much of a chance to watch many growing up, but Mako was always into sea-life... She found this one movie named Ponyo and dragged me into watching it with her, does that count? It was a pretty cute art style and story." At least, he thinks it to be considered an anime.

[csperspectives]

HAYAO MIYAZAKI 

written: 3 - 4, june 2022

museum tour: 24, may 2022

(i am super excited to be writing about this entry.)

this is one of the last exhibits i entered in, and it was the whole reason why i decided to visit the academy museum of motion pictures. unfortunately, the HAYAO MIYAZAKI exhibit will be closing on june 5. by the time this goes up, or by the time you read this, the exhibit will no longer be featured at the academy museum.

the academy museum of motion pictures did have a rule where you are not allowed to take any photos or videos inside the exhibit whatsoever. most of the photos and footage i attained was from outside the exhibit. now that i realize it, this rule lets you be fully immersed in HAYAO MIYAZAKI's work.

{little history lesson on HAYAO MIYAZAKI. he was born on 5, january 1941 and is a japanese animator, director, producer, screenwriter, author, and manga artist. not only that, but he cofounded Studio Ghibli. he has many awards, and one of them is the academy award for best animated feature for his 2001 anime movie Spirited Away.}

the question is: why did the academy of motion pictures decide to dedicate a whole floor exhibit on HAYAO MIYAZAKI?

on the museum's website, it stated that they wanted to celebrate him as an artist and a filmmaker.

[just want to give a thanks to curator Jessica Niebel and assistant curator J. Raúl Guzman for creating a beautiful exhibit.]

as stated earlier, this is the whole reason why i decided to visit the academy museum of motion pictures. before i entered the exhibit, i merely thought it was going to be his sketches, drawings, and outlines posted on the wall, but it was much more.

i was completely mind-blown, and it reminded me of my childhood.

being fully immersed in his work will deactivate you from any cellular device or camera you have. when you enter in, you enter through a tunnel, and then the first part of the exhibit.

once you are completely in, you see a couple of sketches on the walls and some encased in a glass table. however, the first thing that caught my eye was the three large screen showing different scenes from the different Studio Ghibli movies. when i entered in, it showed PONYO.

PONYO is my favorite Studio Ghibli film ever. was i a little excited to see PONYO on screen? yes.

what blew my mind the most most is seeing the sketches and outlines progress as you view it from left to right. it was basically the step by step process of his work. they were lined up in a way where, when you move onto the next sketch, you would see what is added or removed. (this includes change in facial expressions, flowers blooming, and more.)

when you continue to walk in, you would completely feel like you are a character in one of the movies. they had a small grass area where you can look up and see the sky. and if i can remember, it is inspired by The Wind Rises or Howl's Moving Castle. sadly, i did not have a chance to look up at the sky because there were many kids that surrounded the area.

the part that excited me the most is the big tree. it seemed to be a major staple in the movies and in the exhibit. i think the tree was inspired by Mononoke. the tree will lead you to the end of the exhibit. however, just before you exit, they will be showing scenes from My Neighbor Totoro and Spirited Away.

i wish i went to this exhibit earlier in the year so that i can keep visiting, but great things do have to come to an end. i am very disappointed to say that this exhibit will be closing. it felt like a complete dream.

https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZTdcYgj8U/?k=1

signing off: jhanella mae

all photos and videos taken by me.

[killing-time-w-kaz]

I was on IG and my friend posted this photo of a cat. And something in me just cracked.

I have no idea who this cat is but it looks identical to my Nausicaa who died in august.

I forgot how hard grief can hit when you’ve been holding it back. It just plows through. Especially when all of it is held in the same corner of my heart.

And I carry a certain guilt around her death. I wasn’t able to be there when she was put to sleep, because I had gone back to school just days before and there was no way for me to make it back in time. I was on the phone when it all happened, it felt so disconnected. I refused to let my grief consume me, since I need to stay on top of my college work.

And when I was able to go back home for fall break, I couldn’t grieve for my cat because I was barely holding it together after October 7. I broke down in tears when one of my professors had asked if I was doing okay, because she noticed I wasn’t anywhere as energetic as I should be in an archaeology museum.

And I was in the middle of my senior seminar when my parents told me Nausicaa finally came home. It was a miracle I didn’t start crying in class after seeing her box of ashes sitting next to her favorite spot in the apartment (and yes, Ponyo did try to sit on her box). Which brings up more buried grief.

I grew up with two cats, Isabel (the mostly white cat w gray spots) and Phoenix (the mostly gray cat with the old man). They were my mom’s cats, but I was very attached to them and it broke my heart when Phoenix died 4 days before my 11th birthday.

I never had time to fully grieve her death because my grandfather died a month later. And I carry a guilt over his death because the last thing I ever said to him was “I will see you next weekend”. And he died 3 days later while I was performing in a school concert. I refused to go see him at the funeral home, the image of Phoenix dying in the vet table was too fresh in my mind. And so I never truly had the chance to say goodbye to him. I don’t know where his ashes are. All I know is that he and my grandmother will be buried together when she dies—I am scared of the day she does. And that September, my grandfather’s nephew also died, and I wasn’t able to make it to his funeral because I had to go on a school sleepover trip.

I got Ponyo and Nausicaa in November 2013, so they briefly overlapped with the ancient Isabel. She liked Nausicaa, as seen in the photo above. She was 19 when we had to put her to sleep in December 2013. And I covered the loss of all four family members with the two new kittens. Isobel’s ashes rest on the bookshelf next to the window, where Nausicaa now also rests.

I was organizing my parents’ old photos when I came across the photo of Phoenix and Grandpa—I felt a pang in my heart when I saw it. And shortly after I went through those photos, I left for Portugal to do field work. I left two healthy, 10 year old cats at home. And on the last day of the field session, while we were breaking down site, I missed a call from my mom:

When I got to town, I broke away from my teammates to take the call. And that’s when I found out that my sweet girl had suddenly gotten cancer, which was moving so fast and aggressively. At first I tried to hide from the remaining archaeologists, because I couldn’t let myself be seen breaking down in the middle of town. But that completely failed when I got to the lunch table. And my supervisors and teammates were understanding—I still laugh fondly at their attempts to comfort me (that’s a story for later).

But it was devastating thinking that my little cat was dying an ocean away. But she held on for the week—my parents came out to join me in Portugal, leaving her with a family friend who took very good care of her. And she held on for two more weeks once we got back. It was exactly 21 days from when I got the first phone call to the last video call. But in the end, I still wasn’t able to be with her in her last moments. I had a shift at my job that I couldn’t skip and I was visiting my grandma the next day. I gave myself the weekend to grieve, then I threw myself into my part time job, school work, and social life. And in short succession, a very old family friend had a stroke and died, another family friend died after a steep mental decline, and a friend/colleague of my parents (who I knew) lost his fight with cancer.

And I often feel like I have to be the strong one in my friendships. And when October 7 came, I found myself holding my friends as they broke down. And Jewish underclassmen know they could always come to me if they need a hug or a shoulder. My campus best friend and I have adopted an absurd number of underclassmen this way, some of them even refer to us as their “mothers”. But I never took time for myself. I work the most hours at the bookstore, partially so I don’t spend time just with my thoughts.

And seeing that photo on IG brought all these emotions back in a flood. I just needed to put them somewhere so they don’t continue to eat away at me. The more I tell these stories, the less they hurt. So thank you for listening

[whatyourusherthinks]

Spirited Away Review

Yeah yeah this movie didn't come out this year, but I saw for the first time this year in when our theater rereleased it, and I want to review it. Not gonna be the last rerelease I do this with either. I don't care, rules are for losers. I'm just not gonna try to CATCH every rerelease, anyway. If I see one I'll review it.

Some of you at this point must be saying "What? You've never seen Spirited Away? It's like the best movie, certainly the best Ghibli movie, EVER!" I know, I know. I love animation a lot, but unfortunately Studio Ghibli is a bit of a blind spot for me. I don't really care for anime, but honestly Ghibli transcends that bias. I just never have a chance to catch them when they come to theaters. I'm trying to do better, I watched The Boy an the Heron when it came out, otherwise before this review I've only seen My Neighbor Totoro and Ponyo. I enjoyed all of those, although I was pretty much the perfect age for Ponyo when it came out in America.

What's The Movie About?

Whenever I ask anyone about Spirited Away, they always just told me to go see it. I assumed for the longest time that the plot of Spirited Away was just something no one wanted to spoil, like it was so surprising or full of twists that an synopsis would ruin the experience. Bullshit, watch this:

Spirited Away is about a little girl who accidently ends up in the spirit world, has her parents turn to pigs, and has to work in a bathhouse from spirits while devising a way to escape her situation. Boom. That easy, nothing major spoiled.

What I Like.

Well, first off, it's a Studio Ghibli film, so the animation is spectacular. It's always full of just little touches to movement that brings a realism and attention to detail. I really like how character's run in Ghibli movies, the sudden speed and energy that is a drastic change to the deliberate movement present in most scenes. The story is alright, but the backdrop of Japanese mythology is great. I love that all the spirits have interesting designs and a depth to even the simplest designs that makes the spirit world interesting. I really like the design of the bathhouse. Mundane locations that appear infinite but not repetitive are really interesting to me, I dunno. The narrative of the movie wasn't the best thing I've seen, but it was expertly paced and almost everything was set up and paid off masterfully (Almost...) I weirdly got pretty invested in the side characters too.

What I Didn't Like.

I really did not like for the romance between Sen and Haku. When it was first brought up, I honestly thought all the characters were either making fun of the main character or were senile, but no, I guess the third grader is in love with the ancient spirit of a river she almost drowned in. (At least they didn't kiss.) Speaking of which, that little tidbit of the of the character's backstory came completely out of nowhere. That a real shame considering how most of the rest of the story is set up so well. I feel a lot of the Sen/Chihiro character is bland, and almost Mary-Sue-y in parts. I mean, it's not egregious, she spends a good amount of the movie falling over or smacking her face on things. But it does feel like for 3/4ths of the movie all her problems are solved because a spirit gives her something or because of luck. And while I think all the Japanese mythology is a cool backdrop to the movie, if you're like me and don't know hardly anything about it, you'll be very confused about certain things. Am I supposed to know what No Face is? I looked it up and all I found was that he was a metaphor for the main character's loneliness, but the characters in the movie talk like the audience is supposed to know what kind of spirit a No Face is.

Final Summation.

Every person who told me this is the best movie ever is a weeb. Maybe the onus is on me, I tend to be overly critical of anything that people tell me is "the best thing ever". Most of the time it's because the "best thing ever" isn't actually good (cough cough Dark Knight cough), but other times I feel like I go out of my way to find issues with something that is perfectly fine. Good even. But is it not the duty of a media critic to find issues are determine whether the media is entertaining enough to overcome those issues?

I'm overthinking this. Is Spirited Away good? Yes, obviously. Is it great? Uh... Y-yeah, I'd be okay with saying that. Is it the best movie ever? God no. I wouldn't say it's the best Japanese movie ever, or even the best Miyazaki movie I've ever seen. But it is worth your time to watch if it is something that interests you. Just don't let a white person who desperately wants to be Japanese convince you that missing out on watching this movie is like missing the birth of your child or something.

[letterstoponyo]

09/07/2023

Dear Ponyo,

Hey. So my sem started last Monday. I’ve been chasing around profs to I could maybe get a chance to be in their class because I’m still underload. I’m confirming my slot in my ENSC 11 course tomorrow which should be a breeze because I come at the referral of another prof of the same course. I’m just kinda nervous in case the new prof changes his mind or doesn’t honor the referral of my previous prof. Good news though, my new prof isn’t the prof I had last semester. I do wish he doesn’t pace the class too quickly so I don’t burn myself out.

Dad’s playing games with a friend. So he isn’t talking to me right now. I like it when your dad has other stuff going on, I get to think to myself and do my own thing. Me times have always been important to me.

09/12/23

Dear Ponyo,

Hi baby. Sorry I wasn’t able to finish the draft above in the same day. There was so much going on and I didn’t know what to put first so I just took a nap and when I woke up life took over. Someone I know online had just put their pet cat down and was cremated at the same place you got cremated in. Do you happen to see her there? Maybe try to make friends since she’s new and probably doesn’t know her way yet. Be good to her, which I know you will be. Her dad and your dad are org mates so you can talk about that if you like.

Her death hit way too close to home. Now all I have in mind is how much I miss you and how final your death really is. We may never see you again and I don’t know how to live with that. The world was always wonderful with you, or a version of you in our heads, in it. I don’t know what to do whenever that thin glass separating reality and recollection shatters. It’s almost as if I’d rather live fooling myself that your death isn’t ultimate and someday, somehow, you’ll find your way back to us. That maybe you’re just off vacationing someplace. In your case I prefer imagination over fact. You’re never gone, you’ll come back because of all places that deserve you, you belong to us most.

I miss you Ponyo. Some days dad and I are okay. Days like today, a tear or two would roll down our cheeks. Every day we love and miss you still. Every day there’s nothing I wouldn’t do to bring you back.

There with you always,

Mom and Dad

[jngsjngs]

On a ghibli kick but also have hsc on my mind 24/7 so….. What pair of ghibli protagonists do you think best represents todoreiko? What about other hsc pairings (bakurei, etc)?

ur just like me fr 🥹 hope u had a chance to watch some of the films in theatres for ghibli fest!! ! idk if any pairings necessarily represent hsc but with halloween coming up i can see rei x etc dressing up as certain characters for their costumes

i want to say todoreiko would obviously be seiji and shizuku but whisper of the heart is my favorite of all the movies so i’ll always be biased (also just realized that the 🎀 emoji is the exact color of shizuku’s pink shirt and pink sweater haha brb crying)

real ones remember the spirited away reference but it’s hard to picture anyone as chihiro and haku... rei and kirishima give off purely platonic kiki and tombo vibes and rei and kaminari are definitely sheeta and pazu even though i can’t really explain why???

i’ve seen fanart of bakudeku kiribaku and todobaku as ashitaka and san and bakugou was san in every single one lmao but for some reason i can't unsee bakurei as ponyo and sousuke (he’d still call her guppy omfg) (brb again crying even more)

not sure if u asked this exclusively with potential rei ships in mind but i feel like her parents fit howl and sophie a lot, especially taking into account their quirks and the whole “find me in the future” “i’m sorry i’m late, i’ve been looking everywhere for u” thing </3

it’s kind of niche but i can also imagine todomomo as sho and arietty (except for the fact that i made this couple pretty much impossible in hsc) i just like the parallels of arietty creating her world and sho quietly supporting her

[seokmingiggles]

transmarinus.

(from beyond the sea)

Prompt: "I like the way your hand fits in mine."

Pairing: Lee Seokmin x female reader

Genre: fluff, slight angst, slow burn, mermaid!au, kinda magical overall(?), probably set in the same universe as Ponyo.

6.03k words

Warnings: some alcohol consumption (everyone is of legal age), swearing, the reader has a phobia of the ocean, allusions to drowning (nothing explicitly mentioned).

Beyond the sea, within the sea—both are places you have no desire to explore. You have lived nearly your whole life with an intense fear of the ocean, yet something about it keeps haunting you.

Alternatively, in which you are afraid of the ocean, yet Seokmin shows you that you no longer have to live in fear.

A/N: I don't have much to say about this little passion project; perhaps that Seokmin is one of my main bias wreckers in Seventeen. In my notes prior to determining a pairing for this fic, I had written: "All three have this kind of magical wonder to them that I want to capture," about my possible choices of a protagonist (you’ll find out the other two contenders later on). I hope I have captured this feeling. Furthermore, there are some loose ends for a possible part two if I feel the desire to continue this au. Enjoy!

The lyrics (bolded) are from Somewhere Beyond the Sea by Bobby Darin.

•• Somewhere beyond the sea,

You've never liked the ocean: the seemingly endless dark depths and rushing currents that could pull you below. No, rephrasing your thoughts—you are afraid of the ocean. Sure, it can be pretty to look at on a calm and sunny summer day, and sure, the sea breeze admittedly feels pleasant brushing through your hair and clothes on occasion, but you refuse to give in to its temptation, to even go near it if you can help it.

Somewhere waiting for me,

It can be lonely sometimes, being the only one of your classmates growing up who refused to go swimming on field trips to the beach nearing the end of the semester. You often found yourself alone and listening to the fun they would be having in the shallow tides: a shimmering, azure blue. You learned to bring things to accompany you when your friends would prefer to enjoy their time swimming. A book and a beach towel resting on the silky sands was often your set-up. Not much has changed since then.

My lover stands on golden sands,

You've become better over the years at handling your fear. When before, you used to hesitate to even step foot onto the sand, now you have become comfortable with the squishing feeling between your toes. However, boats are another story. Your mom once took you on a cruise when you were a child, and honestly, you enjoyed it. Well, for the most part, only until the last night of the tour. Frankly, that's the trip that made you develop your fear of the ocean in the first place. Since then, you've refused to step foot on any watercraft. It's a bit ironic, really. You've grown up on a decently-sized island apart from the mainland—the only way to get across is by a ferry. You're not sure if you'll ever be able to regain your trust with the water.

And watches the ships that go sailin'.

•

"I dare you to go skinny-dipping."

"Oh, hell no. That's a hard pass."

"Really, Gyu? You think she'd do that?"

"You're gross, dude."

"What? Do you want me to go instead?"

"Not really. None of us need to see that."

Being friends with Mingyu, Jungkook, and Hansol—your best friend—is a recipe for no dull moments. You four have a tradition; you'd all take a trip to the Jeon family cabin near the island's peninsula as a way to start your summers. You've all been going for the past few years since your final year of high school, continuing the tradition into your college years.

It's where you find yourselves now, splayed out in drunken messes (some more than others) on the semi-private beach. To your right, there's a small fire pit in the center of your beach chairs. A cold drink is in your left hand to counter the heat in your cheeks from the flames.

"Sorry, (Y/N), I'm an idiot," Mingyu admits after finally realizing what he'd dared you to do. "You don't have to go into the water."

"I wasn't planning on it, but thanks," you reply and take a sip of your drink.

The four of you stare at the fire beginning to diminish. Orange embers glow in the ashes.

Hansol swirls the remains of his beer bottle around. "Why do I suddenly want to go swimming now?"

"Dude, no. It's nearly midnight, and you're drunk," Mingyu retorts, "None of that is a good combination."

The younger boy is about to quip back, but suddenly, a loud splash interrupts his thoughts, heard near the row of rocks separating this property from the next.

The tallest boy stands to try to see the source of the noise, but it's much too dark. "Okay, you're definitely not going swimming now. I don't want to be responsible for your death."

The splashing continues. It isn't as loud as the first time, but it's more constant as if something is struggling by the rocks.

"I'll go check it out," Jungkook puts his bottle down and slips on his sandals, already heading closer to the water.

"Not by yourself, you're not," Hansol is quick to jump to his feet and follow the elder.

You remain seated, and luckily, Mingyu remains at your side too.

•

Somewhere beyond the sea,

Seokmin adores the ocean. Well, he sort of has to since it's been his home for nearly nine decades. He loved playing in the currents with his brothers when he was younger—and now—appreciating how the colour of the water changes the closer he gets to the surface. The ocean makes him feel free. It's like he can go anywhere or see anything. Seokmin can't say he's ever felt love before first-handed, it's not a feeling he can define, but he considers the ocean to be the closest thing that he loves.

She's there watching for me,

He has breached the surface before. It isn't a forbidden action to his people, but it is to be taken carefully; however, there are different rules when you're one of the sons of the merking. There are countless cautionary tales of merfolk who have been spotted by sailors, more on what happens when they get too close to shore. Merpeople are supposed to live for centuries as they slowly age, but most of those tales abruptly cut their lives short. Seokmin feels like the only one who isn't afraid of those stories and wants to see for himself what would happen if he met a land-dweller. He's optimistic that they're not as cruel as the fables portray them to be.

If I could fly like birds on high,

Seokmin is a graceful swimmer. With decades of practice, it's a given talent. He used to struggle when maneuvering through the waves, especially when compared to his two brothers. Yet, with great perseverance and will, Seokmin trained himself to become better. Much stronger and significantly more elegant—he can now soar with ease through the water, quite speedily, too. In his younger days—what would be equivalent to teenagehood in humans—Seokmin would travel for days across the wide ocean, simply feeding his desire to explore.

Then straight to her arms—

Being a part of the royal family means Seokmin is eligible for arranged marriages. Soonyoung, his elder brother coming up on a century old, is already engaged to a beautiful mermaid, Tzuyu; the boy suspects he's next as the second-eldest in their family. Seokmin knows it's to benefit his kingdom, but he also knows that the chance of being in line for the throne is incredibly slim as the second brother. All he wants is to find someone he loves as much as he loves the ocean.

I'd go sailing.

•

"No way," Hansol whispers, breaking the silence between him and Jungkook as they've reached the rocky barrier.

Sure enough, the splashing sound is caused by distress. A boy, looking to be around Hansol's age, is stuck between a few large rocks that have fallen from the wall. It's shallow enough that his torso remains above the surface, but the position looks painful, nonetheless, with one of his arms twisted beneath the collapsed rocks.

"Here," Hansol approaches the stranger slowly, "we can help you."

The boy has a fearful look in his eyes as the human approaches. It's only when Hansol has rolled the legs of his joggers up and is wading into the shallows that he notices the lack of legs the panicking boy has, or rather, the glimmering tail he has instead.

He shrugs off the unusual sight and tries to move the rock, but it's much too large for Hansol to budge by himself, staggering slightly on the uneven ground. He calls Jungkook over to aid him, and the two of them together are able to lift the stone out of the way, freeing the trapped boy.

The stranger slips away and back into the depths before anyone could say anything.

"You saw him too, right?" Hansol asks his friend, pointing out to the vast sea and trying to find some evidence of what was next to him moments ago.

"Yeah," Jungkook is nearly speechless, drying his hands on his shirt.

"He didn't even say thank you."

•

"I fucked up. I fucked up big time!" The youngest brother rants to his siblings upon arriving back to his home safely.

"Alright, Chan, it's time to calm down now-"

"No, Soon, you don't understand! This time was different." Chan continues to ramble, "I would have really been in danger if I was stuck there until morning. The rising sun would suffocate me, no doubt. My precious sixty-one years would be down the drain in an instant!"

“So dramatic,” the eldest chirps. "It's a good thing that those humans found you when they did."

Soonyoung has heard enough of Chan's stories about always venturing off to the shore. He's somewhat jealous. Lately, the eldest has had to spend more time planning for his wedding and preparing to become the next-in-line for the throne. He wishes he could join his brother on an adventure like they used to a couple of decades back.

"Please, Seok, you'll listen to me then, won't you? You're a hopeless romantic."

Seokmin isn't sure if he should be offended by his brother's comment.

"And what if I am?" he asks with his hands fidgeting in his lap. "What does that have to do with this?"

"You're the one who enjoyed exploring the most years ago. I know you've done your share of people-watching before." Chan ponders, then adds more quietly, "Well, and also, the boy who first approached me was kind of cute."

"Oho, does our Channie have a little crush on a human?"

"Great, now you're listening, hyung."

Seokmin sits back and listens to his brothers playfully bantering. He admires them both fondly, sometimes wishing he could be as responsible as Soonyoung, or as free-spirited as Chan. Instead, Seokmin becomes more reserved around his siblings, despite not considering himself to be shy. But the three are well-balanced when they're together.

Noisy, but well-balanced.

"Why do I feel like I need to see him again?" Chan asks Seokmin as they're lying in their shared bedroom. Their older brother has a room to himself, being the next-in-line.

"Maybe you really do like him," Seokmin suggests, not quite knowing what to say. He's never before been enamoured by a particular human, nor any merfolk for that matter. "You're making me curious now. It's been a while since I've seen the surface," he sighs, struggling to remember what dry sand looks like.

"Then you should come with me!" Chan doesn't hesitate to suggest, "I can't guarantee he'll still be there, but it's worth a shot. Right?"

Seokmin hums in thought. As much as he would like to comply with his brother's request, part of him knows how they're not supposed to venture to the surface so freely. Especially with it being so close to Soonyoung's wedding, nothing detrimental should happen to them before the upcoming celebration.

"Besides, I should probably return... this... whatever this is."

Seokmin eyes the strange-looking object with a puzzled expression.

"You know, Chan, it's not very nice to steal things that aren't yours."

•

"Are you sure you checked your suitcase?" you ponder, trying to rack your brain of other locations the missing sandal could have gone. "What about by the hose in the back? Maybe you left it there after rinsing the sand off them."

"No, I've gone through my bags twice already, and I don't think I bothered with the hose last night," Hansol replies. "I have a feeling they're on the beach somewhere. Although, I can't remember if I walked up the path in bare feet or not."

"You were quite drunk, Han."

"Oh, hush. We're on vacation, aren't we?" the boy lifted his eyebrows at the question. "I'm allowed to get drunk. Anyways, will you come with me down to the beach? It's not like my shoe could have walked away on its own," he snickers at his joke, "it's bound to show up somewhere."

You try to ignore the rising uneasiness in your chest. "Do you really need me to go with you?"

"Two sets of eyes are better than one, (Y/N). And I promise I won't let anything bad happen to you. You don't even have to step foot into the water or even go close to it, for that matter."

You sigh and reluctantly agree, slipping on your own pair of sandals for the short walk down to the beach. You know Hansol would have asked one of the other boys to venture with him near the water, but Jungkook and Mingyu had left to get more groceries (and drinks) for tonight, so you were the only option.

"Where did you find the other shoe?" you ask as you scan the area around the fire pit. "Isn't it strange that you only lost one?"

"It was outside the front door. But as you said, (Y/N), I was quite drunk last night."

You giggle at your friend's comment, adding, "Maybe a bird flew off with it this morning," and continue to scan the sand.

"Wait, now that I think of it, I don't think I had that other shoe after we went to the rocks," Hansol considers and begins to walk to the familiar barrier.

The short wall looks smaller in the daylight, but you know the rocks are unstable despite their compact appearance.

You cautiously follow the boy as he ventures closer to the tide.

"You and Kook never did mention what you saw last night over here," you state, trying to create conversation to distract you from being so close to the water.

"Didn't we?" Hansol tries to recall, "I guess we didn't. Maybe because we knew that you and Gyu wouldn't believe us."

"Believe what?"

"Believe-"

You and Hansol turn the corner at the first large rock.

"-that."

Your stomach drops at the sight. There are two boys in the shallows; one is casually sitting and looking around, while the other is floating on the surface.

His rosy, fish-like tail is hard to miss.

"Oh, thank goodness!" Chan exclaims upon seeing the familiar figure, now sitting upright like his brother. "I believe this is yours."

The mermaid holds up Hansol's lost slipper while sporting a beaming smile on his face.

You're in shock. You've read about mythical creatures when you were a child, as most kids do at that age, but never have you thought that their existence is real. Let alone that you would ever come face-to-face with one.

"Thank you," Hansol mutters and carefully approaches the younger male.

Chan introduces himself along with his brother, and Hansol does the same with himself and you.

But you're beginning to panic. The feeling is bubbling up in your throat, and you don't want to break down. So instead, you excuse yourself and run back up the pathway to the cabin.

You miss the way the older merman's eyes remain on your figure as you retreat away.

•

It's far beyond a star,

Seokmin feels strange. It's not the first time he's seen a human-being that close, let alone speak with one, but there was something odd about your behaviour; the unusual feeling seems to stem from seeing you.

"Did you see the way she looked at us?" the second-eldest speaks, recalling your tense expression.

It's near beyond the moon,

"Why? Do you think she's pretty? That would be convenient because I still think Hansol is pretty. I thought he was charming in the moonlight, but now, I can say he's even prettier in the sunshine," Chan hums, repeating the boy's name for the nth time upon their return home. "I never knew humans could be so lovely."

I know beyond a doubt,

"No," Seokmin begins, "I mean, yes, she was pretty too, but she looked afraid of us. Of... me. Didn't she?" He pauses. "I've never had someone be afraid of me before."

Chan glances at his brother's concerned expression. "She was probably just surprised, Seok. Maybe she hasn't seen a merperson in-person before."

"Maybe," Seokmin mumbles, not entirely convinced.

The merman's peculiar feelings about you only fester as the days pass by. When Chan would return to that same beach almost daily in the hopes of seeing Hansol again, Seokmin would remain at his home.

He is strangely impacted by you. Not that you even said a word to Seokmin that day, but the way you reacted threw him off.

He longs to know why you ran away.

My heart will lead me there soon.

•

Not that you needed it, but you now have yet another reason to avoid the ocean.

Hansol ends up journeying down to the beach every time he sees the familiar crimson tail splashing in the shallows from the large cabin window facing the ocean. The other two boys have begun teasing their younger friend about his new fishy pal.

You have tried to express your concern about Chan to Hansol, explaining that he may be dangerous, but your friend has only dismissed your worries and encouraged you that Chan isn't a threat.

"He's a fun guy to talk to. You're welcome to join me down on the beach sometime, (Y/N)," Hansol says as he slips his notorious pair of sandals on. "Actually, Chan has been asking about you lately. If you're doing alright."

You look up from your bowl of cereal with a confused expression. "I don't think I even spoke a word to Chan. Why would he be asking about me?"

Hansol shrugs. "Apparently, one of his brothers has been worried about you. I'm assuming that's why he keeps asking, but that's all I know."

You remain puzzled in your seat at the kitchen table as Hansol closes the front door behind him, wandering down the familiar rocky path towards the water.

"Is (Y/N) coming?" Chan's posture perks up at the sight of the boy approaching.

He shrugs his head, "I don't think so. I'm sure you know by now how apprehensive she can be. Stubborn, too." Hansol takes a seat in the sand. His shoes are off quickly once again as he dips his legs into the water, the gentle waves lapping up to his knees.

Seokmin frowns. He's been accompanying Chan on his near-daily visits in the hopes of seeing you again. With all of the stories Hansol has been telling about the human world and his friends, Seokmin has convinced himself that he wants to properly meet you.

Just to make sure she's doing alright, he tells himself. There's no other reason.

Seokmin takes pride in helping people. As the middle child, he'd often take it upon himself to sort out his brothers' issues, especially on the rare occasion he found them arguing. A mood maker, his mother told him in his youth when she'd noticed the way he always seemed to strive to help others feel better. So when Hansol briefly mentioned your fear of the sea, there's nothing that the boy decides he wants more than to help you see that the ocean isn't something to fear.

However, it is a difficult task to accomplish when you wouldn't even venture down to the beach anymore.

There's part of Seokmin that feels guilty about your recent reluctance. From what Hansol has said, it seems like you were making gradual progress in becoming comfortable near the water. In fact, you hadn't always been afraid of the ocean. Yet, it all seemed to backfire the moment your eyes landed on him and Chan.

It makes Seokmin feel even more responsible for your fear.

•

It's raining today, a stark contrast to the previous perfect blue-sky, sunny weather that you've all been experiencing for the past week on your vacation.

You're the first one up this morning, making your way quietly down the stairs and into the kitchen to make some coffee.

You examine the horizon as the aromatic drink brews. The rain is only spitting down now, but you have a feeling it will pick up later with larger clouds slowly rolling in. It looks like the sun is trying to peek out from behind, although unsuccessful in its attempt.

You pour yourself a cup of coffee when enough fills the pot, hearing the sizzle onto the element when you impatiently remove the container as it continues to drip.

Making your way to the dining table nearby, you take a seat in front of the large window, holding your mug between your hands.

The coffee is too hot to drink right now.

Your mind begins to wander as you wait.

•

(Y/N), age seven.

You wake to a faint ringing sound.

"Mom?"

No response.

You shuffle to the edge of the bed to turn on the lamp. As your eyes adjust to the sudden brightness, you're met only with an empty room.

"Mom?" you say louder, just to once again, unsurprisingly, be met with nothing.

Maybe she's still at the party on the deck, you think to yourself. That would explain the sound. Maybe it's from the music.

You slip out from beneath the duvet and make your way to the cabin door.

You take a deep breath, not knowing why you're so nervous, and open the door.

There's no music. It's an alarm.

You suddenly feel the ship lurch to the side, throwing you off balance and into the side of the doorway.

"Mom!" you cry out, for someone, anyone.

You don't want to be alone.

Tears are prickling beneath your eyes, and immediately, panic rises to your throat.

"Are you (Y/N)?"

A young male rushes down the hallway in your direction.

You nod your head in response, not finding your words.

"Your mom said you'd be down here, come on. She's already up in the rendezvous spot." His nametag says Seungcheol.

You accept his outstretched hand and follow him as he hurries down the corridor back the way he came.

The boat sways again, but Seungcheol stands his ground, keeping you steady on your feet too.

"What's happening?" your voice crackles.

Seungcheol continues to guide you through the interior of the ship. "There was an unexpected storm suddenly. Captain didn't even see it on our radars, it came out of nowhere. We're taking precautions and gathering everyone in the lounge while he works on getting us to shore."

The two of you make it above the cabins where the wind and rain are pelting down stronger than you've ever seen before. You're having a hard time keeping your balance on the rocking boat, your hand slowly slipping out of Seungcheol's grasp.

A giant wave hits the side of the ship, effectively removing your small hand from Seuncheol's as you're thrown to the side.

You scream as the wave seems to drag you away and pulls you off the edge of the ship.

You hear someone else yell; maybe it's your mother, maybe it's Seungcheol, but before you know it, you are doused in the cold ocean.

The instant your body falls into the depths, you're frozen, petrified, unable to move. You try to struggle your way to the surface, but your clothes weigh you down, only making you sink further below.

Your lungs burn. Trapped in the darkness, you can barely see the moonlight above anymore.

You succumb to your watery grave, eyes closed and arms wrapped around your small figure in a final effort to gain warmth.

Suddenly, you are hit by a feeling of serenity like your mother is cradling you once again. You lean into the tender touch and begin to drift away into unconsciousness.

She belongs to the sea.

You seem to hallucinate a raspy voice hiss out the strange remark.

And then you're gone.

•

Each time you see the familiar grey, gloomy clouds in the atmosphere brings you back to that one fateful day from your childhood.

You know something else happened to you after you fell into the water, but you can't for the life of you recall what.

You know you somehow made it back to the shore safely in one piece. Could it have been that kind staff member who collected you from your room? Or perhaps your mother who dove in after seeing you fall overboard?

You've kept that day to yourself; the only one who knows the full story is Hansol. Not even Jungkook nor Mingyu are aware of all the details; they only know the gist of the origins of your fear of the ocean.

"Whatcha thinking about?"

Hansol's voice brings you back to reality. He's come from the kitchen and is currently standing next to you. Now brought back to your senses, you feel the slight sting from the hot cup of coffee resting between your palms.

"Nothing," you mutter out, removing your hands from the ceramic. You keep your gaze out the window at the hazy horizon; the tide seems to be rising with the weather getting progressively worse. "Are you seeing Chan today?"

"No," he answers, taking a sip from his cup. "Not that I know of, at least. I doubt he'll come if it's raining like this."

The wind looks like it's beginning to pick up. You can hear it howling on the other side of the windows.

"Right, of course."

The boy takes a seat across from you. "Are you sure you're doing okay?" he pushes, "You know you don't have to stay here for the full two weeks with us, right?"

"I know," you reply, "I've just been feeling more anxious recently, but I'm not entirely sure why." You take a sip of your coffee, burning the tip of your tongue slightly. "But I'll be okay."

Hansol's concern for you doesn't waver despite your words or the smile you’re presenting.

"Some storm, huh?" Mingyu's voice is heard from the staircase as he treks down to the main floor. His hair is still damp from his shower.

Hansol makes a noise of acknowledgement and takes another sip of his coffee.

Mingyu prepares a cup of coffee for himself. "Do you think the water will rise all the way up to the deck?"

You involuntary freeze at the thought.

"No, it shouldn't," Hansol says confidently.

And it doesn't, but it does come close. As the rain continues to pour, the entirety of the rocky path becomes submerged beneath the saltwater.

The sound of the storm keeps you awake as you lie in bed that night, picking at a loose thread on the duvet cover. You think you can feel the cabin sway with the heavy wind, but you blame it on your imagination.

She belongs to the sea.

You blame your imagination for the husky voice you hear too.

The sea.

The shutter on your bedroom window flies open; it's certainly not your imagination this time. You immediately stand up and make your way to the adjacent wall to close it, only to see just how high the tide has risen since you've retreated to bed.

Now you must be dreaming.

The sea level appears to be just below your window. Being on the upper floor of the cabin, that's more than concerning.

"(Y/N)?"

You back away from the window at the sound of your name spoken from the other side of it.

A vaguely familiar mop of damp brown hair appears outside your windowsill.

"Seokmin?" You squint your eyes at the face you see in the moonlight. Panic laces your voice, "What the hell is happening?"

Yeah, you really must be dreaming.

The merman reaches his arm through the threshold of your window with his hand open for you to take.

"Do you trust me?"

Every part of you screams no. No! You've lived your whole life in fear of the ocean and what resides within it. Taking this creature's hand would contradict your entirety.

"Please," he adds.

You feel yourself being drawn towards him, one foot after another taking you closer until your hand brushes against his. His fingertips are pruned, a sensation slightly rough against your smooth ones.

When he closes his hand around yours, you hear the rain abruptly stop.

Everything becomes silent, like the drops of water have stopped with time.

"It's okay," Seokmin whispers, warmly smiling at you.

Before you know it, his lips connect with your forehead.

And you suddenly remember that night you fell into the abyss.

•

The instant your body falls into the depths, you're frozen, petrified, unable to move. You try to struggle your way to the surface, but your clothes weigh you down, only making you sink further below.

Your lungs burn. Trapped in the darkness, you can barely see the moonlight above anymore.

You succumb to your watery grave, eyes closed and arms wrapped around your small figure in a final effort to gain warmth.

Suddenly, you are hit by a feeling of serenity like your mother is cradling you once again. You lean into the tender touch and begin to drift away into unconsciousness.

She belongs to the sea.

You seem to hallucinate a raspy voice hiss out the strange remark.

And then you're gone.

No, you think you're gone, but the burning sensation in your lungs is alleviated.

You open your eyes once more to find your small body enveloped by another being. It has a tail: a long, dark violet tail extending beneath you. Your fear hasn't left you completely, but the way you're cradled so carefully eases you.

"It's okay," a gentle voice whispers, causing you to look up to meet a pair of brown eyes and a warm smile. "You're safe."

"What's happening?" you hear your voice ask for the second time that day, unsure of how you're able to speak beneath the water.

"Your father wants you home," is the boy's response, "but I've tried to tell him it's not your time yet."

"My... father?"

You can't picture a face to the name you speak. Each time you've asked your mother about him, she's only said how he was a wonderful man. Was.

"Yes, (Y/N). Sorry about the storm. He gets emotional when thinking of you." One of the merman's hands supports the back of your head to his chest as he dashes through the water. "It's because he misses you."

"Are we going to see him now?"

"No, not yet. One day I'll find you again, and we will see him. Together."

Before you know it, your heads break through to the surface where the weather is much clearer than before. Your rescuer moves slowly towards the beach near the dock, continuing his hold on you until your feet can touch the ground.

You cough up some of the water that infiltrated your lungs before asking, "May I know your name?"

The merman smiles once more, the apples of his wet cheeks reflecting the moonlight. "You will, one day, little jellyfish."

•

Your eyes open only to find you still stood by your window with a familiar set of arms around you.

You take note of his purple tail extending below.

"You," you whisper, taking a step back from the windowsill to get a proper look at the boy residing on the other side, "We've met before."

Seokmin chuckles at your realization, "Yes, many years ago."

"You saved me."

"Kind of," he ponders. "You wouldn't have drowned; your father wouldn't have let that happen. I only made sure you wouldn't sink to the bottom of the ocean."

"Right, my father." The title still sounds alien from your mouth. You gesture to the flooded outside, "Did he do this too?"

Seokmin sheepishly scratches the nape of his neck, "Word may have gotten around that you were visiting the oceanside. You know how excitable Chan can get."

You smile at the idea of the youngest royal brother bragging about seeing you. "If my father's a merman, then why am I human?"

"Who said your father's a merperson?" Seokmin counters, "He's less of a merman and more of a sorcerer who resides within the waves."

"No shit."

The boy giggles at your remark.

"But if I technically come from the sea, then why have I been so afraid of it?"

"Are you still afraid of it now, jellyfish?"

You open your mouth, about to say your habitual response, but only to find yourself lacking one life-long phobia.

"No," you furrow your eyebrows.

"It was a spell I placed on you, back when you were a child," Seokmin fiddles with your hand; his is now dry. "It was to prevent you from returning when you weren't ready."

"Am I ready now?"

"My goodness, so many questions."

But Seokmin takes the time to answer them all for you.

You pull up a chair to the window as he remains in the raised tide.

That night, you learn that you're less human than you originally thought. You're not a merperson like Seokmin and his brothers are, but you do similarly come from the ocean.

Your father had unexpectedly met your mother one summer's day, the two falling in love faster than either party had expected. You weren't necessarily planned, but the two were ecstatic, nevertheless. Your father had to return back to the depths—his home—leaving your mother alone for the rest of her pregnancy. Yet, after she had you, she was significantly less lonely. She seemed to have the whole ocean supporting her, despite her lover unable to return to the surface.

When you were an infant, you were drawn to the water. Perhaps you could hear your father calling out to you for you to return home at sea with him, where he thought you belonged more-so than on land.

Seokmin had placed the spell on you to give you the opportunity for a normal youth on the surface. He recalled the way he so strongly loved being free of stress and confinement before his royal responsibilities became more prevalent and only wished the same for you.

Practicing magic under your father's teaching made Seokmin create a spell strong enough to last for over a decade.

He refrained from telling your father what he'd done that night when he found you. He knew how powerful the man was; a tsunami or hurricane could have easily been a product of his emotions.

Although now, the spell has worn off. Once more, you find yourself inexplicably drawn to the water and arguably even-more-so to the boy with his hands encased in yours.

"Will I get to meet him one day?" your eyes examine the way Seokmin's thumb grazes across your knuckles, tracing every crest and trough on your skin.

"Yes," he says, "though only when the tides lower again. I don't want him flooding the entire island out of happiness."

You hum out an "Okay" and catch the beginnings of the rising sun in the distance, illuminating Seokmin's already-glowing silhouette.

•

We'll meet beyond the shore,

"(Y/N), could I try something?"

Seokmin's ears are tinted a pretty pink as he examines your form sitting in the shallow water.

You shift your attention from feeling the silky sand beneath the waves lightly lapping against your ankles and to the merman sitting next to you. His hair is slowly beginning to dry from being in the summer sunshine.

We'll kiss just as before,

Seokmin takes your hand tenderly and brings it to his lips. It's a gentle touch, but the act sends a flurry of butterflies straight into your chest. The boy smiles brightly, his eyes slightly crinkling at the corners, and laces his fingers between yours.

Happy we'll be beyond the sea,

"I like the way your hand fits in mine, jellyfish."

Your eyes meet Seokmin's, who are trained on the pair of your intertwined hands.

"I like it too," you admit, smiling as his gaze lifts and meets yours.

He slowly leans in.

And never again I'll go sailing. ••

[letterboxd]

Siren Song.

Undine writer-director Christian Petzold talks to Reyzando Nawara about modern-day mermaids, Tinder culture and finding the magic in life.

“Love stories always change. A kiss in Berlin 1933, for example, is not gonna be the same kiss in Berlin today, right?” —Christian Petzold

“If you leave me, then I’ll have to kill you.” Undine’s threat to her soon-to-be ex-boyfriend Johannes, after he has told her that he has met someone else, seems at first like an over-the-top reaction to the breakup. But it is a curse that Undine must fulfill, for she will become human only when she falls in love with a man who is doomed to die if he is unfaithful to her.

From Splash to Ponyo to The Lure to Song of the Sea, mythical water spirits, usually female, sometimes horse, have powered many film plots. The sixteenth-century European myth of Undine, in particular, lies behind many screen adaptations of Hans Christian Andersen’s The Little Mermaid, though the Danish writer was not the first to popularize the fairytale in his century. Decades earlier, around 1811, Friedrich de la Motte Fouqué of Germany had produced his romantic novella, Undine.

And it is to Germany—specifically modern-day Berlin—that writer-director (and fellow German) Christian Petzold transports Undine in his contemporary magical-realist take on the myth. There, she does not take the form of a mermaid or siren, but a beautiful young woman (played by Paula Beer), who works as a historian at a museum, where she guides tours of Berlin’s architecture and its reconstruction. The breathtaking cinematography, by regular Petzold collaborator Hans Fromm, crystallizes both the romance and the beauty of Berlin, while Petzold’s leads root every scene in reality, even as aquariums explode and giant catfish drift past.

Paula Beer and Franz Rogowski fire up the streets of Berlin in ‘Undine’.

Water may be the dominant element in Undine, but Beer and her co-star Franz Rogowski bring fire to their scenes together. Where Beer brings charisma and intensity to the titular role, Rogowski, as Undine’s new love interest, an industrial diver named Christoph, offers charm and sweetness.

In the frenzy of Parasite’s world domination, it is easy to forget that Petzold’s previous feature, Transit, appeared in two of our 2019 Year in Review lists—the 50 highest-rated films and the highest-rated international films—and was one of the top romance films of the 2010s. His riveting Phoenix is still his highest-rated film on the platform—one of many to center a complex female character in search of love at a time of personal and/or political crisis. In Undine, Petzold does it again, a welcome departure from other adaptations, including the Colin Farrell-starring Irish romantic drama Ondine (2009), that have mostly told the myth from the perspective of its male characters. Petzold also revises the fairytale, by giving Undine a chance to try to emancipate herself from her curse.

We recently had the pleasure of speaking with Petzold about his fascination with water, the magic of Berlin history, modern dating and of course, his ongoing collaboration with Beer and Rogowski.

Spoiler warning: this conversation contains plot details regarding the ending of Petzold’s film ‘Transit’ (2018).

Your movie is inspired by the myth of Undine, but you reinvent it by giving it some modern twists. How did the main narrative for the film come about? Christian Petzold: I think the idea of the story first came to me around twenty years ago when I had a project in Germany. It was together with Claire Denis and also Kathryn Bigelow, and everybody had to make a ten-minute short film for a project based on the museum near the Rhine River. I had written a little dialogue—oh, by the way, Steve McQueen was also part of the project—and it was the scene that we can see in the movie in the first few minutes where Undine’s boyfriend, Johannes, said that he doesn’t love her anymore and that he wants to leave her and she said to him, “If you leave me, then I’ll have to kill you.” Then she goes back to work, and later when she comes back to try to find him again, he isn’t there—so she knows that she has to kill him now.

Then when I made Transit with Paula Beer and Franz Rogowski, I told them after a very lucky and happy time of shooting, that I had written a short story and wanted to make a 90-minute feature movie out of it together with them. I wanted to keep working and making movies with them because we’ve had an amazing experience together in Transit. This was basically the start of how the movie and my collaboration with these two actors came about.

Paula and Franz are actors who didn’t come from the basic German acting school; their backgrounds are dance and theater. But they both have so much curiosity about cinema—when I met Paula for the first time, for example, she told me that she had bought 50 movies by Alfred Hitchcock and wanted to see all of them, and to me, this is the best kind of school to learn about cinema.

So to some extent, Undine is a spiritual sequel to Transit? Yes, you’re right. It has so many things to do with Transit. Marie, Paula’s character in Transit, finds her own death in the sea—she’s drowned. And Franz’s character, he’s waiting at the land, hoping that she may come back from the land of the dead. So I said to them, “Okay, the next movie is gonna be about a woman coming out of the sea and going to the land to search for love and also about this young man who is a diver, who is going underwater, to find love as well.” So to some degree, it’s a sequel, you’re right.

Beer and Ragowski in ‘Transit’ (2018).

You mentioned earlier that you had a great experience working with Paula and Franz in Transit. Can you tell us what it was about these two actors that you thought would capture the story you wanted to tell in Undine? Paula is a very young actor—she was 23 when we started Transit, and she was around 24 when we made Undine—but when you’re filming her, she has this ability to make her characters much more mature beyond her real age. In one second, she’s 45 years old, with a whole experience of someone who’s had a hard life and has gone through so many bad things, then one second later, she’s thirteen and innocent. And to have that kind of ability—to go from one point to another—is just really fascinating to me. I’ve never seen other actors do this before in my life.

Franz was a dancer, and if I remember correctly, I think he was also in a clown school for a circus, so he can do everything with his body. It’s unbelievable what he can do. He has this amazing physicality that I admire and haven’t seen before in other German actors. When they’re together sharing a scene, they dance with each other. And this is the thing that I like so much about them and the thing I need in Undine, because I need actors who can float from one scene to another as if they’re dancing underwater.

In literature and pop culture, the myth of Undine has been mostly told from the male perspective. You reframe the narrative, to give Undine the opportunity to maybe emancipate herself from both the male figure in her life and the curse. Tell me more about that choice. Two or three years ago, I had a retrospective in New York, and I had the chance to see some of my previous movies again—[laughing] I’ve actually never done it before, revisiting my own movies. And at that time, I realized that I’ve always tried to rewrite the stories centering on women, which were made by men in the ’40s, ’50s, ’60s and ’70s, from another perspective: the perspective of the women.

When I was in Venice for the first time, Claude Chabrol [was] in the same hotel as me, and he had a Q&A. I wanted to say hi and tell him how great he was but I couldn’t do it because I was very young and too shy for those things. I heard what he said when asked why in his movies, the women are always the main characters. His answer was, “Men are living, women are surviving. And cinema is about surviving.” It was such a fantastic answer.

All the movies I [have] made, including Undine, are about surviving. Undine wanted to survive her curse—she tries to, every time, since centuries ago. In so many iterations of the myth, Undine always has to go back into the lake and to the life the curse has set for her. I really wanted to zoom in on that, to liberate the character of Undine from the myth and the curse.

In the movie, Undine works as an historian at a museum, and in her tours, she talks about Berlin’s architecture and its reconstruction throughout the years. How is this related to the romantic aspect of the movie? Everybody says you can take a love story and put it in the sixteenth century or the nineteenth century, and it’s always gonna be the same kind of love story. But I think that’s not entirely right. Love stories always change. A kiss in Berlin 1933, for example, is not gonna be the same kiss in Berlin today, right? Therefore I want to take the historical aspect of Berlin architecture and its reconstruction to tell the story of two young people in Berlin nowadays, to see the evolution of both this love story and the myth of Undine itself.

What’s the significance of all the buildings Undine mentions in the movie? The buildings serve a very important role in the movie because Berlin is between two rivers on an island, and the city is built on dried-out swamps, so the element that Undine is coming from, which is the water, is destroyed in Berlin. It doesn’t exist anymore. And therefore Undine doesn’t have any habitats, so she has no choice but to adapt and to live on the land.

In some way, I always think that the modernization in Berlin erases history, and when there’s no history, there’s no magic, which means magical creatures like Undine won’t exist. That was the main idea of the architectural elements in the movie.

Is that also the reason why there are two locations in the movie: Berlin, and the small town where Franz’s character, Christoph, works and lives, which is still full of swamps? To show that in this small town, magic still exists? That’s a good question. The romance and the myth of Undine is a part of German and European history. It’s a unique enchantment. But in Berlin, where modernization and civilization keep growing and changing, there’s no enchantment anymore. So I want to show how in this small town where everything is still kept as closely natural as possible, the enchantment and the charm of Germany are still there.

There’s a beautiful and romantic poem by Joseph Eichendorff that says, “You must find the right world, so everything can sync again.” To me, that line encourages us to find the magic of the world back. We live in this world surrounded by retro buildings and retro behavior and retro music, but it’s all actually just an illusion of magic. The real magic, that’s something that we have to find—either by movies or camera positions or poems or even by preserving the naturality of a city. And the Undine myth actually has a lot to do with this.

Another thing that fascinates me about the movie is how the dynamic between Undine and Johannes, in some way, reflects the state of modern dating. Is this something that you also wanted to capture when you wrote the script? [Laughing] Funny story, when Paula read the script for the first time, she told me that she liked it so much because the story reminded her of Tinder and modern dating. And on some level, it’s true; part of Undine is about modern dating. I always think that in the era of dating apps, everything gets much simpler—you meet someone, you have sex (or perhaps not), and if you feel like this someone is not handsome or beautiful enough for you, you can keep scrolling until you find someone new. So, dating right now is like going to the supermarket.

Johannes leaving Undine to be with another woman, who for him is better-looking than Undine, reflects the culture of Tinder. And the line I mentioned earlier, “If you leave me, then I’ll have to kill you,” is the opposite of that kind of dating life. And Paula, who hates Tinder, loves that line a lot. Some of the actors are on Tinder, I’m sure, and that’s understandable. Actors are sometimes very lonely because for six to eight weeks, they are deep inside of a character, and when they’re on break, they’re in some sort of “black hole of loneliness”.

Writer-director Christian Petzold.

Undine being a water nymph, of course, makes the water element very important in this movie. But water has actually been heavily featured in some of your previous features as well, like in Yella, Barbara and Transit. Can you tell us why you find water fascinating? I’ve seen a documentary by Agnès Varda, and in [it] she said, “The place where one element is touching one another is the place where cinema builds its stories.” That’s why she loved the beach, because on the beach, there’s water and there’s the earth and there’s also wind, and they’re touching each other. So to her, the beach is the perfect place where you can tell a story.

For me, however, the reason I like featuring water or the other elements in most of my movies is because it has something to do with seeing my characters coming from one element then going to the other elements; to see them act and react in a new and sometimes uncomfortable place. Also, when you see pictures or paintings, so many of them are about people looking deep into the sea. I always feel like that kind of painting is actually about a desire. And most of my movies, at [their] core, are about desire. That’s why water is so important to me. Deep under the water, there’s the place of desire.

What’s the first movie that made you want to become a filmmaker? The first movie I loved very much as a kid was The Jungle Book, but the first movie that made me want to become a filmmaker was by Alfred Hitchcock, The 39 Steps. I was fourteen or fifteen years old when I saw the movie for the first time, and I loved it from the first moment. The movie is about a man and a woman who are bound by handcuffs, and they don’t like each other, but because they’re on the run, they have to communicate and come to an understanding. And the love story starts because of that communication, not because of looks, and I love the movie so much for that reason.

If you could program a double feature with Undine, what movie would you pick? Good question. I would say The Night of the Hunter. Also maybe Creature from the Black Lagoon or 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea or The Son’s Room by Nanni Moretti. These are the movies that I would recommend for a double feature with Undine.

Related content

More ‘Little Mermaid’ adaptations: a list by Katherine

Paula Beer strolling around towns cinematic universe

Diogo’s mega-list of Mermaids in Film

Horror’s History with Scary Mermaids: a Bloody Disgusting list

Follow Reyzando on Letterboxd

‘Undine’ is in theaters and available on VOD in the US now.

[novelist-becca]

I’m getting old and I need something to rely on

Ko-Fi Commission for @liesminelli! I’m so sorry this took so long. 

Fandom: The Owl House

Rating: Teen

Relationships: Eda Clawthorne & Luz Noceda, Eda Clawthorne & Lilith Clawthorne

Summary: Eda misses her magic, and Lilith makes her feel worse. Luckily, she has a kid to remind her she’s not alone. 

Title is from the song Somewhere Only We Know by Keane.

AO3 link here

FFN link here

Also, part of the argument scene was inspired by this post by @sterling-jay and the hug scene was inspired by a scene from Ponyo, where Lisa tackle-hugs Sosuke. Watch that scene if you want to see what I had in mind.

Losing her magic was the pits.

Eda knew that she wouldn't escape petrification completely fine, but it was still a bummer when she tries to cast a light spell, or any other spell, and nothing happened. It felt like there was a phantom ache, like something was ripped out of her.

And she remembers what Luz said.

“It's okay. I can teach you what I know, and what we don't know, we can learn together.”

Eda said she looks forward to it, but…she doesn't know if she's ready to accept that her magic might be gone for good. She doesn't want Luz to feel bad, either. The kid wants to help her. Still, her magic is not the same…

But you gotta let her.

Thanks to how long they were up and what they went through, nobody started waking up until 10:30-ish. When Eda walked into the kitchen that morning and saw Lilith there, her stomach churned. She'd almost forgotten that she let her stay.

Lilith had only started to make things better by using her pain-sharing spell and bringing her back to her cursed form. She couldn't just leave her out there after that. But…it was long overdue. They both knew that. Lilith may be her sister, and she may have removed half of the curse, but she is still the one who cursed her in the first place. She's still the one who said nothing for years, who thought the best solution was to have her arrested instead of facing her and talking to her. Hell, she even mocked her “weakened” state a few times before! And worst of all, she was still the one that had hurt Luz.

Of course, Eda warned her the night before about what she'd do if she ever harmed or disrespected Luz again. She hopes she'll take it to heart.

“Oh, good morning Edalyn.” Lilith greeted. Unlike yesterday, her hair was…a bit less neat. It was…somewhat refreshing.

Eda said nothing and only side-eyed her as she made her cup of apple blood. She doesn't have the energy to talk to Lilith right now.

Lilith shrugged and started searching the kitchen for something. “Ugh, I need some coffee. Honestly, Edalyn, how do you find anything in here?”

Eda rolled her eyes. “Look in the cabinet. And it's not that messy.”

“I see.”

While Lilith made her drink, Eda sipped hers, wondering when Luz would come down. She supposes that the girl is sleeping in. Understandable, given last night. Luz will wake up on her own time.

Or maybe I should go wake her up, Eda thinks, feeling worry build up.

Lilith sat across from her, staring into her mug. “So…it turns out that I still have some of my magic.” She began.

That made Eda look up. “Oh?”

“Of course, it's weakened, so I'm not as strong as before, but at least I still have it.” Lilith said with a small smile.

“And you're telling me this why?” Eda said, narrowing her eyes. A part of her was jealous, and angry. Why does Lilith get to keep her magic after everything?

“Because I can help you now! You may have lost your magic completely-”

“Don't remind me…”

“-but I still have mine! I can still help you! Isn't that wonderful?”

Eda stared at her sister. She talked about how she still has her powers as if it's some miracle. But to Eda, it feels unfair.

“What, you think I'm useless without magic?” Eda glared.

Lilith looked taken aback. “N-no, of course not! I just mean that I think you could use a lot more help now that you've lost your powers.”

“You think I'm weak? You say this like it'll comfort me somehow, but it's doing the exact opposite.” Eda said. The last thing she needed was somebody making her feel inferior.

“I thought that at the very least you'd be happy.” Lilith said sternly.

Eda stood up. “Happy? You think I'd be happy that you still have your natural magic after everything you did?” She sneered.

Lilith stood up as well. “I share the curse with you now! I thought you'd appreciate that I'm making an effort now!”

“Well, I do appreciate it. But what else do you have to answer for? Oh right. Not saying anything about the truth for thirty fucking years, trying to have me arrested as a solution…” Eda listed, clenching her fists.

“Edalyn! You know I was only trying to help!”

“And there's also how you thought our tyrant of an emperor could cure me! You call that helping?”

“You wouldn't understand! You're being very unreasonable! Don’t forget I saved you!” Lilith tried.

“No, Luz did, which is another thing, you tried to kill her to bring me down!” Eda yelled. The image of her own sister tossing Luz over the bridge would never leave her head.

“Edalyn! I'm not the only one who played a part in your suffering, you know!” Lilith argued, slamming her hands on the table.

“Oh really? Your part in my suffering? Who else was involved, sister? Do tell me.”

“I admit, Emperor Belos is a deceptive liar, and I was a fool to believe him. And the petrification may have played a part in taking away your powers. And the hu-”

Eda pointed an accusing finger at her sister, glaring daggers. “Apupup! Stop right there! Don't you dare finish. Luz has nothing to do with this.”

“But if she hadn't-”

“Hadn't what? Luz was only trying to help me.” She growled. “And she definitely helped me more than you did. You don't get to blame her for your mistakes. Not on my watch.” Eda took a deep breath to calm herself. She hoped their argument hadn't woken up Luz. However, at that moment, she noticed the girl coming down the stairs, only to stop mid-step, watching the sisters, looking unsure if she should intervene or not.

Shit, we probably woke her up. I hope she didn’t hear anything she shouldn’t have...

“Why can't you just trust me? I thought that we had a chance at making things better!” Lilith said angrily.

“Why should I?” Eda said lowly, crossing her arms.

Then, at that moment, the conversation was interrupted by Luz grabbing King, trying to keep him from running into the kitchen.

“No, don’t!” she muttered. Eda and Lilith turned to see her looking up sheepishly and slowly making her way back up the stairs. Unfortunately, King had escaped her arms and began shuffling around the kitchen for food. Lilith’s shoulders slumped.

Eda pinched the bridge of her nose and turned back to her sister. “Lily, listen to me when I say you can’t just split the curse with me and expect everything to be instantly better again. You have a long ways to go before you can expect me to forgive you. Think about that.” Then she turned around towards the stairs. “I need to be alone.”

~

As soon as Luz saw Eda pass in the hallway, she got up and made her way towards her mentor’s room. She knows Eda might want some privacy, but after hearing the fight downstairs, she couldn’t just...leave her alone.

And Luz definitely knows Eda would do the same for her.

When she reached the door, she raised her fist to knock. “Eda?” she said. “It’s me, can I...can I come in?”

After 10 seconds, Luz pushed the door open and let herself in. Her mentor was splayed out face-down in her nest, one arm hanging over the edge. She’s hurting, I know it, Luz tells herself. She walks closer.

Eda senses the girl’s presence, but says nothing. Normally, she’d tell her to go away, but she didn’t have the energy to do so. She found the kid’s company comforting anyway.

Luz stood in front of the nest, looking down at the witch. “I...heard you and Lilith. I didn’t mean to eavesdrop, I promise!” Eda said nothing. “I understand how you feel. You’re not the only one who lost something, you know?” Luz continues, hoping Eda was listening. “You lost your magic, and...I lost my only way home.” Luz lifted a hand to stroke Eda’s hair, feeling her throat start to tighten at the reminder of her loss. “We’re in this together, okay? I-I’m gonna help you, promise. I owe it to you.”

Eda looked up, seeing Luz looking out the window. Her heart warmed at how unbelievably understanding the girl was. Once again, she was reminded of how much she had changed since Luz had come into her life. Her beloved, sweet, caring kid was like a light in the darkness. In a sudden burst of affection, she reached out.

Suddenly Luz was yanked into a tight hug. “Ah-!” she grunted, startled by the sudden mood change. Eda had flipped herself over, squeezing her girl affectionately and holding her close.

They were in an awkward position, but Eda didn’t care. Titan, she loved this kid so much! “You’re so good!” she said. Then she sat up, still holding Luz. She pulled away slightly, looking down at her. “Don’t you worry, kiddo, you don’t owe me a thing. I know that as long as we’re together, everything’s gonna be okay.” She moved a hand up to ruffle the girl’s hair, then moved it to cup her cheek. “I love you so much.”

Luz smiled, leaning her head against the witch’s chest. “Okay.” Her heart warms at how much Eda cares. So she laid there, letting Eda hold her.

The pair sat there for a moment, Eda cradling her kid close and resting her cheek on the top of her head. It wasn’t often they got a moment like this, and she wanted to cherish it. There’s no way she deserved somebody this wonderful.

It was Luz who broke the silence first. “I know you miss your powers, but, will you let me know when you’re ready to try glyphs?”

Eda loosened her grip a little bit so Luz could move to sit in her lap more comfortably. “I think I can try them out for you.” She said. Luz was right. Glyphs may not be the same as her old magic, but they’re still magic. If Luz can figure it out with that big brain of hers, then why not her?

Luz smiled, satisfied with that answer. She wrapped Eda in another hug.

Another minute massed and Eda pulled back. “You know what? How about we go see what we can scrounge up for breakfast? I’m starving, and I’m sure you are too.”

Luz nodded. “Heck yes I am! But, it’s almost noon, so, don’t you mean brunch?”

Eda rolled her eyes. “Eh, what the hell, I was close.” she playfully flicked Luz’s forehead, earning a giggle from her. “And after that, you can try to teach me, got it? Let’s see what you can do with that big brain of yours.” she said, ruffling Luz’s hair affectionately.

“Eda, you’re the best!”

[queen-of-my-goofball-army]

An Ode To Miyazaki:

Hi everyone! So for my final paper for film, we had to pick our own director of our choosing and talk about them extensively between the attributes that make them special. Our course focused on the narrative and technical styles of directors. For my final project, I have chosen my biggest hero in the world of animation and somebody that drastically changed my life as a young child, Hayao Miyazaki. Learning about him for this project gave me so much insight into not just his films but who he is as a person. I hope that my paper is as interesting for you to read as it was for me to do research for!

1. Hayao Miyazaki, often referred to as the Japanese Walt Disney is the front runner of his animation studio Studio Ghibli. I picked him because I already have sufficient knowledge and love of his films. One of the first memories that my parents love to remind me of is my first time watching Totoro and laughing at the introduction characters. Miyazaki himself stands out for a number of reasons. Over the years, Miyazaki has made a humongous name out of himself, one of his most famous movies Spirited Away became the most popular film to ever be released in Japan and also won the academy award for the best-animated film that year. His most “popular” films (I say popular in air quotes because it is nearly impossible for people to agree on a favorite) remain the aforementioned Spirited Away, My Neighbor Totoro, Howl’s Moving Castle, and Princess Mononoke. Beginning his career as a simple animator for Toei animation, he worked as an in-between artist. It was here that he met his future collaborator at Ghibli, Isao Takahata. His first big directorial debut in film before founding Ghibli was a team effort without Takahata was Lupin The Third, The Castle Of Cagliostro. His first successful movie was one that was based upon his own manga Nausicaa of the Valley Of The Wind. The first official Miyazaki movie that was made with Ghibli was one of my personal all-time favorites that had ever been created, Castle In The Sky. For many children, especially ones with parents who are lovers of a film like mine, Miyazaki was one of the first animators that I was introduced to. His films have become classics for every fan of animation, being referenced in culture, specifically back when Disney owned Studio in Toy Story 3, Bonnie has a Totoro.

2. So, this brings up the question, how does one recognize a film by Miyazaki? You can always expect for him to be critically acclaimed, for there to be some element of magic and whimsy in the way that he animates, for there to be something to do with flight (whether it be dealing with airplanes like in Porco Rosso, the idea of flight in Howl’s Moving Castle, or a floating castle up in the sky in Castle In The Sky.), his heroines are always strong-minded and live by their own rules never bowing down to anybody, his love stories are dynamic and fulfilled, a sweeping score by Joe Hizashi, and they have a meaning about nature somewhere, mostly about why it needs to be protected.

Let’s start by breaking him down narratively. The thing that is always in every Miyazaki film no matter which one you decide upon watching, is that his female characters are always strong-willed no matter what. In many ways, I think that he writes women better than Disney does. He has gone on record saying “Many of my movies have strong female leads—brave, self-sufficient girls that don't think twice about fighting for what they believe with all their heart. They'll need a friend, or a supporter, but never a savior. Any woman is just as capable of being a hero as any man.” Sometimes, this will cause them to come across as reckless, or stupid, but in my opinion, I have always looked up to his female characters and the way that they are portrayed. My personal favorite female character that he has ever brought to life through the screen is Sophie from Howl’s Moving Castle. She is strong-minded, not willing to put up with any of Howl’s dramatics, kind, an incredible adult figure for Markal, endlessly sympathetic to her friend’s plights (namely Howl and Calcifer), and somebody that I can always look up to. I spent most of my childhood looking up to characters like Kiki in Kiki’s Delivery Service, Chihiro in Spirited Away, or one of my personal favorite underrated girls, Fio in Porco Rosso. All of these female characters are independent and never let themselves be taken advantage of by anybody.

Another trait that can always be found narratively in his films is that Miyazaki is an airplane/ air travel fanatic. He absolutely loves airplanes, even to the point where his latest film, The Wind Rises was based upon the life of one of the first airplane manufacturers in WWII. Almost all of his films will involve something about flying in the air. Even with the ones that he didn’t direct and he just simply wrote. His obsession with flight is something that stemmed from his childhood and he never saw them as a thing to be used for war “airplanes are not tools for war. They are not for making money. Airplanes are beautiful dreams. Engineers turn dreams into reality.” My personal favorite of all of his flight animation is used in Howl’s Moving Castle when Howl and Sophie “fly” over the heads of all the people below them.

Narratively also one of the biggest things that set apart his films from any others is his focus on nature. The idea of protecting the beauty of nature is something that he has always stood by. A lot of the time, America tries to prove that it can make films about nature as well to usually varying results. I think that nobody can sell an environmental message quite like my biggest hero for Japanese animation. One of the main movies that focus on his will to protect nature above all else is Princess Mononoke. He always manages to animate nature in such a beautiful and majestic way no matter where the film is set.

I also think that a narrative trait of his that often gets overlooked is how beautiful the romance in his films can be. He never has a romance between two characters that feels stale or boring. I love the fact that you can pick any number of his films and the chance of there being a romance that you’ll get sucked into is a very large one. Everybody has their personal favorites, I love Howl and Sophie from Howl’s Moving Castle but my best friend loves Sousuke and Ponyo from Ponyo. He has on record saying that “I’ve become skeptical of the unwritten rule that just because a boy and girl appear in the same feature, a romance must ensue. Rather, I want to portray a slightly different relationship, one where the two mutually inspire each other to live - if I’m able to, then perhaps I’ll be closer to portraying a true expression of love.” Writing romance between two characters can be a very tricky thing which is why it’s always amazing when he can continually pull it off despite everything and how many films that he has made over the years. The beauty of having both a strong and independent male and the female character is that they can both lean on one another for love and support. Probably the biggest supporter of this is Whisper Of The Heart, a film that he wrote instead of directing. The romance is what makes up the entire film. It’s a beautiful love story about how two young teenagers fall in love with each other. The romance is something that continually keeps me coming back for more every time.

Technical style Miyazaki can always be assured to deliver breathtakingly stunning animation. There is a reason why so many people leave his films starving because the food that he draws always looks so good. For me though, it’s the backgrounds that stand out above all else. It’s nearly impossible to have one favorite shot in one of his films but I as a matter of fact do have one. The most breathtaking animation in any Miyazaki film is the scene where Howl takes Sophie to see his secret garden. Everything about this scene never fails to make my breath catch. It’s such a profoundly beautiful moment and how it is animated is something that I haven’t forgotten since my first initial viewing of the film when I was seven.

Another iconic technical trait is that Disney did a fantastic job dubbing the films from their original Japanese language into English. Back when Ghibli films first started to become popular, they needed a way for an American audience to see them. So Pixar’s CFO at the time, John Lassater made a deal with Ghibli that they would dub all the films from their original language for a brand new audience. Growing up, this was how I watched all of Miyazaki’s films. I fell in love with the way that they sounded in English. To this very day, I have yet to see one of his films in any other language. I don’t think that anybody could have dubbed them better. Ever since Ghibli and Disney went their separate ways and they went to GKids the dubs haven’t been the same.

Finally, the last technical trait is that a Miyazaki film will always have a score done by his longtime collaborator Joe Hizashi. The score is such a big part of what makes Miyazaki’s films his own. They are what get you sucked in through their whimsical and magical tones; they always fit the vibes that he’s going through at that moment. There is also the element of sound. Every Miyazaki film has a distinct sound effect that will set it apart from the one before it.

3. The first film that I want to look at is my personal favorite of all his films that he has made so far if you were to force me to pick just one Howl’s Moving Castle. Released in 2004, it was the 9th film that the director came out with. It has an 8.2 out of 10 on IMDB and an 87% on Rotten Tomatoes. The storyline for the movie follows a young woman named Sophie. She gets a curse set upon her by the Witch of the Waste and when she leaves home she finds the infamous Howl’s Moving Castle. This is the second Ghibli movie voiced by a Batman live action actor. Christian Bale voiced Howl Pendragon after Michael Keaton played the titular Porco Rosso.

Narratively this is definitely a Miyazaki film. From how strong of a female character Sophie is I spent most of my childhood looking up to her as a character. Strong female characters are everywhere in his films and in my opinion, Sophie is one of the strongest. Another strong factor is that flight plays a major part in this film. One of Howl’s main powers is that he has the ability to fly around. This leads to my favorite scene of flight in any Miyazaki film when Howl takes Sophie’s hand and they “fly” over the tops of the city down below them. All of his early films up until the last few were set in someplace other than Japan. This one is set in Europe, and he takes a lot of time while in the cities to show off all the different types of buildings while Sophie tours around the city.

Technically speaking this is also a Miyazaki film and holds all the titular traits of being so. The animation is utterly for lack of a better word, magical and spellbinding. It takes my breath away every time that I rewatch it. The food looks incredible, one scene that most of Miyazaki’s fans always think of when this movie is brought up is Calcifer making the food for Howl, Sophie, and Markal to eat. The dub for this film is also one of Disney’s best dubs for Miyazaki films. It even brings actors to the table that I usually would not like to see in other films like Christian Bale. I haven’t loved him in any other films than this one. Billy Crystal is a stand-out as well as my favorite fire demon Calcifer. The score is done by Joe Hizashi as well. My favorite part of the score is the main theme which has Howl and Sophie floating above the people below. The sound effect that follows throughout this film is the steady creaking of the castle itself.

Princess Mononoke was the first time that Miyazaki ever “retired”. Most of the time, whenever he tries to retire, he always comes back. A lot of his colleague's joke that it’s because he physically can’t stop working. He animated most of this movie by himself. Before Spirited Away it was Japan’s most famous film to date. The story about a young man who is just trying to erase the curse that was set upon him by an angry boar and it leads him to a place called Iron Town is something that never fails to amaze me. While in Iron Town, Ashitaka meets a young woman named San who was taken in by wolves and he finds himself caught between a war involving humans and the gods of the forest.

Narratively this is definitely a Miyazaki film. It has a strong female lead, focusing most of its screen time on how important it is to protect and preserve nature as a whole. The idea of protecting nature is such a moving part of the film, as we see what it does when man takes over the forest. We see how distraught it makes the Gods of this world and how they wish that the humans would just go away. However, you also see it from the point of view of the villain of the film Lady Eboshi, who also regularly helps lepers and people who would often never get work outside of her offering them a home and a family. I have regularly gotten into a debate with my mom over which side is “right” and which side “wrong” over the course of the last few years of me being a massive fan of this movie. She takes the side of the forest while I see Ashitaka’s side that everybody should just get along and interact in peace and harmony. Miyazaki never shoves the idea of nature down your throat. That is not what this film is. It’s instead about the beauty of what we have and learning to appreciate it.

On a technical level, this film is fantastic as well. It blows my mind that Miyazaki-san animated most of it all by himself. The backgrounds are sweeping and utterly gorgeous showing off the time period of the film. The fight sequences which make up the bulk of the film’s running time are engaging, thrilling, and fabulously animated. Mononoke’s score was done by Joe Hizashi as well. Its score is beautiful and I always find myself getting sucked into it, especially for the more dynamic scenes with Ashitaka and San. The sound effect for this film uses nature as a backdrop for brutality. Ashitaka’s arrows don’t just come out of his bow, they screech through the air.

Finally, my last film that we will be focusing on, Kiki’s Delivery Service was made in 1989 a year after his cult phenomena My Neighbor Totoro and was his fifth animated feature. Kiki is a young girl that is hoping to become a young witch in training. However, to do so she has to train a year away from home. She and her cat Jiji find a town by the sea where she learns her true strength and what she can really do to help others. Hayao Miyazaki didn't want to bore the audience during the film's end credits by using just the names. He set it up to be like a mini-sequel so that the audience would leave the theatre feeling happy.

Narratively this has all the traits that one should be familiar with and associate with a Miyazaki film. It has a strong-minded female character at the source of it that young girls can look up to and admire. As a kid, Kiki was my favorite female character of his because I loved her strength and her dedication to what she was good at. She knew that she was still young and had a lot to learn but even though she gets depressed she doesn’t let that stop her in the long run and will still save her love interest Tombo. The romance in this film is by far one of the sweetest. I love the interactions between the characters and the way that they both inspire one another to be better than they are. The idea of flight is basically the focal point of everything. Kiki finds that her best trait is that she flies incredibly well and decides to create her own flying delivery service.

Technically this also has a lot of traits that Miyazaki made a name for himself in doing. The animation is spectacular, especially for Kiki’s flying. I could watch her fly around all day and that was the idea that he was going for while making the film. The sweeping score by Joe Hizashi, especially in my favorite song A Town With An Ocean View, is something that I’ll often listen to outside of the film itself. The sound effects for the film are meant to be calming. From the first sound that you hear of the wind rolling through the reeds while Kiki lies against the grass to the waves when she finally finds a home.

4. Miyazaki as a director has inspired me since I was way too young to even remember. When I was a kid I would pretend to run around my apartment building's front yard imagining that I lived in a big house in front of a camper tree like the one in Totoro. His movies are perfect for children that “suffer” from having an overactive imagination. His movies are everything that is bright and beautiful in the world. The animation never fails to take my breath away, the characters and stories are unforgettable, the soundtracks sweep me away and tell stories themselves. His movies are something that even my parents, who are not anime fans, can watch over and over again. I think that speaks for itself. Miyazaki makes films that are art, not just animated films.

[honeypwark]

[ Technical Difficulties ]

  ↳ Neo City - The Origin Tour

       ↳ Yuna is tackled by Yuta. She gets stuck on a stage lift. Yuta apologizes.

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Note: This idea was taken/highly inspired by one of @heesvt’s posts. I hope you’re doing okay, lovely 💕

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

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Jungwoo jumps back as an unknown mass jumps onto Yuna and sends her to the ground with a surprised shriek. Jungwoo laughs as he sees Yuta now laying haphazardly on top of the younger girl.

“Why?” Yuna groans from under Yuta.

“Okay, honestly, I didn’t think I’d take you down,” Yuta says while standing, “Are you really that weak?”

“Maybe you’re just heavy,” Jungwoo counters, helping Yuna to her feet.

Yuta hits the younger boy in the arm and Jungwoo gives an exaggerated reaction, wincing and cowering behind Yuna’s smaller frame.

“Hey, guys, let’s try not to injure one another when we have a tour starting in less than a week,” Taeyong calls to the three, but mostly Yuta.

“Sorry,” Yuta says without an ounce of sincerity but refrains from tackling or hitting anyone else.

The twelve members of NCT 127 wait in the wings of KSPO Dome’s main stage. Their tech crew is working on finishing installing the stage lifts, so the members have been given a brief break from rehearsal. They all sit out of the way of the staff as they work, talking amongst themselves but mostly just relaxing for a moment quietly.

“Can we get five members onstage to help with final lift alignments and calibrations?” a staff member approaches the idols to ask.

“Let’s go, Yuna,” Yuta says, he and Jungwoo starting toward the stage.

“I’m good; heights freak me out,” she says.

“It’s not that high. Come on.”

Ever since she was first put into NCT, Yuta has looked out for Yuna. At first, he just found it cute how similar their names are but then he became close and extremely protective of her. He helps her to be a little more daring and drags her out to do things when she’s cooped herself up inside for too long. Whine as she might, she’s able to trust Yuta to gauge whether or not she’d be up for doing something or not.

That’s why when Yuta grabs her wrist to drag her onstage, she doesn’t protest much more except dragging her feet a little. She, Yuta, Johnny, Katie, and Jungwoo end up on the five lifts in that order, with Johnny in the middle and Jungwoo and Yuna on either end.

After a minute more of talking on radios to the staff working under the stage, a staff member tells them, “Okay, we’re going to start moving.”

Surely enough, just after he says that, Jungwoo, Johnny, and Yuna begin to be lifted up. Yuna stumbles a little as her platform begins to move but finds her balance quickly. Yuta still laughs teasingly at her momentarily. Katie and Yuta begin to be lifted as well as the first three are lowered. Yuna’s platform suddenly stops with a jolt as the other four continue moving smoothly.

It doesn’t just stop moving, whatever engine is powering the lift rattles and clicks loudly as the entire machine shakes. Yuna goes completely still, too startled to react. A staff member below is shouting for the engine to be turned off. The engine continues to click, louder and louder until it sounds like something is breaking.

The platform that Yuna stands on falls slightly to one side and Yuna shrieks but is still too afraid to move. Her nails dig hard into her palms at her sides, eyes squeezed shut. Blood is rushing in her ears and she is absolutely terrified, heart pounding and stomach tied into knots. She can already feel the tears coming as they always do when she gets scared.

“Yuna! Yuna, hey. Yuna, look at me,” Yuta calls out to her.

If she wasn’t so terrified, she would have noticed the staff member down on the stage trying to give her instructions to get her off safely. But she’s too scared to even lift her head and look at Yuta.

“I told you I didn’t want to come,” Yuna cries.

Yuta realizes with horror that she’s crying, really crying. He knows she cries when she gets scared but usually she’s laughing at herself as she sheds a few tears. Not this time. Her crying has quickly escalated to sobbing, her shoulder beginning to shake.

“I told you,” she repeats.

“I know. I’m so sorry, Yuna. Can you please look at me?” Yuta asks.

“I’m scared,” she wails, fear clouding her mind so much she is unable to fake bravery like she usually does when watching a scary movie.

“I know, I know. Just lift your head and look at me. Okay?”

Yuna sniffs and sobs but gains some control of herself. She very slowly lifts her head to look at Yuta. He can see from his own platform that she’s so tense and scared that she’s trembling.

“Tell her to walk slowly over to you,” a crew member says from the stage.

“I can’t do that. I can’t do that,” Yuna immediately protests.

“Yes, you can,” Yuta interjects.

“No, I can’t. I can’t, I can’t.”

“Yuna? Yuna. Calm down. Take a deep breath. Okay? With me. In. Out.”

Yuna breathes in and out with Yuta. Tears still flow from her eyes but her sobbing has ceased.

“You’re gonna be fine,” Yuta tells her. “Just put one foot in front of the other and walk towards me, okay? You can do it. One step at a time.”

Moving as slowly as humanly possible, Yuna slides her right foot in front of her left. She starts to shift her weight and repeat the process of taking a slow step with her left foot when the platform shifts under her, following the position of her body weight. She screams and sobs, stopping her movements and retracting her arms up to her chest.

“I didn’t want to do this. Why did you make me do this, oppa?!” Yuna wails, so scared that she doesn’t think twice before placing blame on Yuta for the situation.

Guilt grips at Yuta’s chest but he focuses entirely on getting Yuna to safety. He is the reason she’s on the lift in the first place, he’ll get her off of it.

“I’m so sorry, Yuna. I shouldn’t have made you come,” he says. “Just two more steps and you’ll be okay but you’ve got to keep moving toward me.”

Yuna is staring at the platform she’s standing on, unable to move her feet like they’ve been glued down. She’s back to sobbing, her crying heard above the chatter of staff members and worried NCT members below.

“Yuna. Look at me.”

She does, sobbing like a child but unable to stop herself.

He holds his hands out to her, standing as close to her platform as possible while staying on his own, “Two more steps. Just two more. You can do it.”

She’s unable to calm down as she slowly takes another step toward Yuta. She reaches her hands out for his. Halfway through her next step, her hands meet his. The second he can grabs onto her fingers, he pulls her toward him and onto his platform. She immediately trucks herself into his chest, seemingly crying harder as relief of being safe washes over her.

Yuta takes only a moment to sigh in relief and wraps his arms around Yuna before shouting down at the staff members, “Down, down, down! Bring us down, now!”

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Yuta knocks on the door to the NCT girls’ dorm, waiting just a few moments before it’s pulled open by Songi.

“Hi, Yuta,” she says.

“Hey,” he returns. “Um, is Yuna okay?”

“Yeah, I ran her a bath after Katie and I showered. I just heard her draining the water, so she should be out in a couple minutes.”

Yuta steps into the dorm and takes his shoes off, sitting on the couch anxiously as he waits. He hears the bathroom door open and sees Yuna exit just briefly before she heads directly into her and Songi’s bedroom, not even realizing Yuta was waiting for her. She comes back out quickly, probably alerted of his presence by her roommate. She clad in a tee shirt and sweatpants, both several sizes too big, damp hair hanging loosely around her shoulders.

“Oppa,” she says when she sees him.

“Yuna,” he says. “Um, I wanted to apologize about earlier. I didn’t really have a chance before rehearsal started again and you came home with the other girls. I would never have made you come if I had known there would have been a malfunction like that. I know I push you to do things a lot but I would never purposely put you in danger.”

“I know that, oppa,” Yuna says, “And I accept you apology. I don’t blame you; I was so scared I wasn’t thinking clearly.”

“Regardless, I brought Ponyo and strawberry ice cream and figured we could-“

“Yes,” Yuna says before he can finish, always ready to watch her favorite movie, especially with her favorite ice cream.

Yuta smiles, “Okay.”