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youandtom2 · 3 years ago

Note

Tom Holland, smut, He is a prince and y/n is a commoner whom he is in love with but the king and queen don't know. Run wild with it!

a/n: love a bit of prince tom (modern day Prince!Tom) SMUT 18+ also this turned out a lot longer than I anticipated :)

There you are, standing just a few rows back from the golden gates of the palace being swallowed up by the crowd. You're impossibly hard to notice given that with a crowd this large, faces blur together in the sea of bodies, but Prince Tom's eagle eyes pick you out only minutes from emerging onto the royal balcony. On the sunny afternoon of the eldest Prince's birthday, the Royal Holland family present themselves gallantly in front of their public servants, reveling in the loud cheers and admiring the colours of their coat of arms waving proudly into the air. The Royal Holland family are beloved by the masses to a global extent, so when everyone heard that they would show their appreciation publicly, nobody had to think twice about seeing the royal family for themselves. It truly is magnificent spectacle to behold and certainly a cause for celebration.

Dressed in his royal blue uniform adorned with a white sash and decorated with gleaming badges, Prince Tom stands poised next to his father and younger brothers who gracefully thank the public, saluting the royal air force as it flies overhead.

"Aren't they just majestic?" One woman declares behind you.

"Just the perfect family!" Another woman cries.

"Such beautiful, beautiful people." Oh, how you know.

You give a small knowing smile when Prince Tom's eyes find yours. No matter how often those eyes have landed on you in the past, you still can't seem to familiarise yourself with the sheer power those eyes hold. A firm, confident gaze that always has your heart skipping a beat or two, that always drops an anchor in your stomach, and always, always raises your temperature. Dazed, your brain buffers slightly at his ability to pluck you from the crowd; one of the hundreds of thousands standing here in the royal promenade.

Before the Royal Family retreat back into the palace, Tom casts you a glance and with the wink of his eye, he disappears from view. The simple gesture casts your mind back to when you first met him; a sheer accident but memorable to say the least. You worked in the children's hospital as a nurse and as part of his royal duties, Prince Tom was visiting to pay his respects to both patients and workers. You were supposed to be out of the way, out of sight and working behind the scenes as the higher-ups and supervisors took charge of guiding Tom around the hospital to ensure that everything went smoothly and according to plan, but you couldn't resist just one look at him, even if that meant risking your employment to do so. In the end, you made a fool of yourself. The chair you used to see over the crowd crippled under the weight and you went falling to the floor with a crash. It was loud enough to catch Prince Tom's attention and instead of being a spectator to your clumsiness, he didn't hesitate to maneuver himself through the crowd to pick you back up onto your feet again with gentle hands and a genuine concern for your wellbeing. You assured him you were okay, nonsensically stumbling over your words and apologising profusely for the disruption. At the time, you couldn't look at him in the eye, too embarrassed to face to situation you were trapped in, hoping that shuffling away would solve your problem but he wouldn't let go. He needed to see the truth in your eyes, to know that you were actually okay before he dismissed you and until you eventually met that powerful gaze of his, he wouldn't stop his fussing.

It was like a bolt of lightning; the quick, almost tender moment of silence before the thunder. He held your gaze with a soft smile to which you could only mirror with your own, soft whispers of reassurance flowing through your lips.

Somehow, that little interaction however quick it seemed, was the turning point for Prince Tom. After that visit, he became a sponsor and took every chance he could to come out and visit the hospital again and without a doubt, you were always on his agenda. He would never leave without a wink.

The crowd slowly disperses behind you, shuffling their way back down the royal promenade to host their own celebrations back home. You follow your own path through the park, past the trees and the evergreen grasslands, past the shallow duck ponds as they bathe underneath the sun, past it all until you find yourself at another main road. Your basement flat lies at the bottom of a short narrow staircase off the city's streets, concealed to all who don't know it's there. Its entrance hides directly beneath a larger concrete staircase that carries up towards a grander entrance of the tenement building. You're proud of your little flat; it's your little secret.

You decide that in celebration of the Prince's birthday, you order yourself a pizza and crack open a bottle of rosé. The simplicity of it makes you laugh; what decadent luxuries would the Prince really be eating on his birthday? You couldn't imagine the extravagances of a royal dinner.

Not too long after ordering, a knock emits from your door. With your purse in hand, you approach your opaque glass door, seeing a hooded figure behind and thinking how uncharacteristically quick the deliver was.

"Hi-oh my god!" Alarmed, your eyes widen upon seeing the set of brown irises that caught yours earlier in the day, and not the glum, tired eyes of the delivery driver. In your doorway, stands Prince Tom, clad in a sweatshirt with a hood hanging over his head and his hands tucked deep into the pockets of his light blue denim jeans and although a completely alien sight to see, there's something about seeing him in casual clothes that doesn't unnerve you as much as him being here does.

"Hello again." His smile stretches wide across his lips, completely mesmerising.

"Prince Tom! What...what are you doing here?"

"I wanted to see you. You're not busy are you?"

Dumbfounded by his response, you almost forget to answer as you welcome him into your home. "No, not at all. I've just ordered a pizza actually." A natural cedarwood scent follows behind him as he trails into your home and you finally get to relish it without it being masked by the horrible disinfectant smell of the hospital.

Why the Prince of England would elect to come into your basement flat on his birthday is beyond you, yet here you both are.

"I, uh, I can't say I was expecting you, Your Majesty, so you'll have to forgive the state of my flat." You murmur as soon as you notice the pile of laundry stacked in your living room, waiting to be ironed.

"Call me Tom, please. We've known each other long enough. And don't be silly, your flat is gorgeous. It suits you."

Jesus. Don't read too far into that...

"Thank you. So...can I get you anything? A drink? I've just opened some rosé. It's just a cheap bottle from Asda though..."

"A cheap bottle of rose is exactly what I need right now, thanks. After you." You take lead and he follows you into your kitchen, already lit with candles, the bunkers topped with a single empty plate and a lonesome glass of wine. A light flutter murmurs in your heart when you reach to grab another, knowing that the evening ahead of you is already seeming to be less lonely.

Tom takes a seat at your breakfast bar, pulling his hands from his pockets and revealing the curls beneath his hood, taking in the sights of the room around him. You have no other choice but to throw a smile when he catches you glancing at him, but you concede with yourself; it can't be helped, not when the eldest son of the most prominent family in the country sits calmly in your kitchen. You can't seem to describe yourself the same as the bottle shakes slightly in your hand, pulsing at the elevated beat of your anxious heart. The nerves of his sudden appearance have yet to dissipate.

With a composing breath, you hand him his wine glass and he immediately thanks you with a winning smile.

"Pizza shouldn't be too long. You're welcome to have some if you haven't already eaten."

"Yeah, that would be great. If you don't mind of course."

"Not at all. It is your birthday after all...which reminds me. Happy birthday." You offer up your glass to clink with his and he complies, watching you as you sip demurely at your wine. "Although I have to ask: why are you here?"

"Like I said, I wanted to see you."

He translates your silence into confusion, his answer seemingly offering no explanation to you whatsoever. To him, it's obvious.

"But...why me? Why not with your family? Or your friends?"

"You don't consider yourself to be my friend?"

"I...uh...I don't know. I didn't want to assume-"

"Why do you think I visit the hospital so often?"

You shuffle anxiously on your chair across from him. "I thought you were just doing your job, making appearances, doing things that Princes usually do."

"I suppose it helps that that's what it looks like I'm doing, but the truth is a little more simpler than that. In fact, I've already said it. Twice." It eventually clicks in your slow, dumb brain and he observes the epiphany gloss over your eyes.

Because he wanted to see you.

"I like spending time with you and what better way to spend my birthday than with someone I like."

"I...I'm glad. Really. I kinda made myself out to be an absolute idiot when we first met, so I'm relieved. And I like spending time with you too. It made me feel a little bit better about myself after my tragic introduction."

Nothing more needs to be said when Tom gently places a hand on top of yours, almost crying at the cruel timing of the delivery driver knocking at your door which meant having to pull your hand away from him.

"I hope you like pepperoni pizza."

"My favourite."

The two of you converse easily over dinner and wine, words of a song settle nicely into the background and it feeds into the tranquil aura of the room. He explains that he snuck himself out of the palace with his two personal bodyguards who are parked outside the flat, the same two bodyguards that found your address and informed him of where he needed to go. He listens as you spill your life story, sharing memories of a younger self that he becomes infatuated with. Hours go by and as the sun sets behind the horizon, the candles slowly become your main source of light, plunging the room in a warm, flickering glimmer that illuminates just enough to see each other clearly. You feel warm, cosy even as you place yourself upon the fabric couch in the corner of the living room, joined very quickly by Tom and his glass of rosé.

You note how close he is to you and although you don't physically react to it, he does. His hand reaches to brush his knuckles gently over the highs of your cheeks, gliding all the way across until he tucks a lock of hair behind your ear. Flustered, you divert your eyes to your hands twitching at your lap, deciding that his little gesture is the final defining piece of evidence to release the feelings you had been suppressing for weeks. First was his concern when you fell, then it was the numerous visits, then it was the unexpected but lovely dinner you shared, and now its the admiration twinkling in his eyes as he watches you coil into yourself.

You really, really like the Prince.

And you think he likes you too.

"This has been really nice. Thank you."

"You're welcome. I'm glad you got to spend your birthday the way you wanted to." It might've been the candles on the other side of the room, but something flickers in his eye. You can't quite decipher what. His finger teases down the line of your jaw very, very slowly. So soft, you barely feel it.

"I'm just hoping it can end the way I want it to." Entranced, you keep his gaze, flickering only to catch his tongue running across his bottom lip.

"How do you want it to end?" You ask, voice reduced to a mere whisper in the suffocating tension.

"Like this." Tom's finger curls beneath your chin, tilting your head as he guides you towards his lips, encasing your own with them. The sweet tang of wine blends together as he kisses you softly, opening you up with each second that passes by. The taste explodes when his tongue searches for your own, a brushing of soft silk as you melt together. It's unbearably slow and tests the patience of your twitching hands, aching to reach for the curls you know lie at the nape of his neck, but you don't want to seem too hasty, not when Tom indulges you like you're a rare flavour to savour.

With his fingers sliding into the roots of your hair, he places one final lasting kiss that drags out your bottom lip with the small nip of his teeth. It's so deliciously sensual that you can't even think about opening your eyes yet, not until you've caught your breath.

Tom's there and waiting for you when you eventually do, retaining the short distance between you just so he can feel the shortness of your breath against his lips. At least then, he knows he's done something right.

With just a millimetre of movement and without the need for a single word to be spoken, your noses brushes together and it speaks a message that reads loud and clear. In seconds, his lips are on yours again with a fiery passion, hungry as he encases your jawline within his hands. There isn't enough time in the world to possibly prepare for what you know is about to happen next as he coaxes you onto your back underneath him, his lips still craving the touch of yours. But all too soon they grow impatient, trailing down your jawline in search for something more, something that could tame the fire that's engulfing him inside. Towards your ear, behind it and down the slope of your neck, teasing out small clips of moans from your throat.

"Tom..." You whimper. He hums in acknowledgement, voice vibrating against the tender skin of your neck, but doesn't stop. Instead, his hand slithers up the outside of your thigh, contorting to the curve of your leg as it finds its way underneath the skirt of your dress. Just as his fingers repeatedly trace the lining of your underwear, he emerges in front of you, eyes locked in a spellbound gaze which you meet immediately.

"Do you want this?"

"More than anything."

Your words paint a smile on his lips, seen only for a second before he kisses you again, this time leaving it short and sweet because he wants your attention elsewhere. His hand, slow and meticulous like his kisses, eases its way under the seam and his fingertips feel every inch of your skin to deliberately build the anticipation, to fuel the craving in you that only he can satisfy and takes pleasure in watching you struggling to cope. He mirrors your reaction just as the tip of his finger brushes against your clit. You've never felt so sensitive yet desperate in all your life and you make it abundantly clear to him when you raise your hips in a bid to feel more.

Thankfully, you feel the weight of his fingers as they glide down your pussy with resolution, exploring more and more as they circle around your bud at just the right tempo.

"Fuck..." you whisper, sensing the knot twisting in your stomach, "please don't stop."

"I won't. Not until I have you screaming for me." The momentary pressure to your clit elicits a salacious yelp from your throat, proving to you that he is capable of getting what he demands. He is, after all, royalty. It's part of his nature.

"Keep your eyes on me," he demands. Your lazy eyes find his, fighting the urge to close them as you feel yourself teetering on the edge of an orgasm that's beginning to consume you. Yet to snap, you can already tell that he's going to have you cumming like no other man has and when you feel that burst of pleasure course through you, your instincts are right. Your pussy clenches, feeling nothing but the fine, precise movements of his fingers torturing your clit, unrelenting as he watches you twitch beneath him.

"Oh my god..." you whimper, reaching for his hand to dull his movements. "Too much, too much-"

He promptly removes his hand, fingers glistening with your slick...until they're not. Beguiled eyes watch as he places his fingers into his mouth, sucking what he can of your taste that it has him closing his eyes with an intense pleasure. Your heart pounds inside your chest watching him, another wave of excitement twitching at your legs while they pinch together.

"Fuck, darling, you taste so good," he lightly taps the side of your legs as he shuffles himself lower and lower, "legs up for me."

Shit. Nobody's done this to you before..."Tom-"

"Legs. Up." His hands find the crooks of your knees pushing them until they're pressed against your shoulders, legs swinging high into the air with your dress bunched at your waist. The cold bite of air reaches your cunt, made worse when Tom peels your underwear from you and blows a gentle breeze that cascades down your slit. Taking a breath, you swallow the thick lump in your throat and lie against the cushion, nervously waiting.

His warm, wet tongue meets your cunt, eagerly coating every inch until he finds your clit and takes it within his mouth. A very audible inhale reaches his ears which he takes as a cue to begin sucking on the little bud. Each sweep of his tongue triggers your legs to shake, your nerves to quiver inside you and the bubble to build. He warned you that all it would take for him to stop is the sound of your screams, and with that threat slowly materialising into reality, your stomach swirls inside you.

He laps and laps, sucks and flicks, indulges and savours until you reach breaking point. The mere fact of Tom being royalty has completely left your mind, and you don't hold back when you grip onto the tufts of his hair, undecided whether to pull him away or bring him closer.

"Fuck, I'm so close!"

"I need to hear you scream for me," he groans, that baritone voice of his vibrating against your clit. His tongue delves deeper, pressing into you that reflexes jerk you away from him.

"I'm not gonna stop. Not until I hear you." Firm hands grip onto your hips, dragging you back onto his amorous tongue.

"FUCK! PLEASE!"

"Do it, cum for me."

Your mouth opens but no sound comes out, at least not at first, not until you take another breath. Your orgasm hits you hard and fast, spiraling out of control the more Tom continues to eat at your cunt knowing he has yet to hear you scream for him. When tension finally snaps inside you does it release the long wail of overstimulation to scratch from your throat, shaped in the words of his name repeated over and over and over again in a desperate plea.

Tom acts quickly, taking the opportunity of your empty convulsing cunt and immediately fills you with his cock, hard and insatiably raw. He thrusts deeper and deeper into your spasm cunt, almost collapsing at the way you suck him in and keep him there but it's no match for the brutal, virile strength of his lust. He consumed by the sound of you, the sight of you, the feel of you that he can't stop, not even when you begin begging for mercy at the first touch of his fingers playing with your bud. It's just enough to prolong the orgasm riddling your body to grant him the satisfaction he craves what seems like hours later.

Tom gently collapses on top of you, sinking his head deep into the crook of your neck and it feels like a reward having his soft kisses meet your skin after feeling locked in such a tension for so long.

"You feel so fucking good," he murmurs into your ear, not long before he kisses the shell, biting and nipping his way to your lips.

~~~

Time almost seems to stand still as you mold yourselves to fit the shape of your bodies. Tom cradles your head, tucked neatly against his chest while his slow breaths skim across the crown of your head. While he intertwines his fingers with your hair, you circle a small pattern on his chest, warm with the rush of adrenaline. Unprovoked, he places a longing kiss against your forehead, his grip on you tightening the longer it lasts and you sense that there's a hidden meaning behind the sadness found tugging at your heart when he does it. A hidden message that perhaps you both knew since the moment he arrived but refused to give it life, because you both knew how much it would hurt to acknowledge.

As much of a fantasy dream this whole evening seemed, you are the one to fall back into reality first.

"The King and Queen don't know you're here do they?" He sighs loudly and shakes his head in defeat. "You didn't tell them...because you knew they wouldn't approve." Again, the silent response of his head nodding tells you he doesn't have the heart to face reality like you have. "It's okay."

"If I could change it all, I would. If it meant we could have this all time, I would change it in a heartbeat."

You snuggle even closer, "I know you would." You take another breath, afraid of the words sitting on the tip of your tongue. "Will...will this ever happen again?"

Distraught, he places another kiss to your forehead. "I don't know, darling. I don't know."

"But we'll figure it out, right?"

There's a hesitant sigh that seeps from his lips. "Right."

a/n: ouch that turned angsty at the end

#tom holland #prince!tom holland #tom holland x y/n #tom holland smut #fluff #angst #tom holland fic #tom holland imagine #AU #peter parker #request #tom holland fluff #tom holland angst #no way home

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ramblings-of-a-mad-cat · 2 years ago

Note

I'd like to know what your thoughts are for this: what if Hogwarts Mystery was made the exactly like Hogwarts Legacy? Would you have enjoyed more or is it better of as a mobile game?

Now that is...difficult to imagine. But I've actually been thinking about it a fair bit ever since I started watching Akemi Stormborn's Let's Play. Because we were all thinking that Magic Awakened would be where all of the HPHM fans would go after the game was over. Turns out, basically everyone left for HPHL instead, and didn't even wait for HPHM to be over. In general, a lot of the hidden areas in this game look like they could be Cursed Vaults, and essentially function that way.

Honestly? I've got no qualms with HPHM being a mobile game, because mobile gamers are real gamers and let no one tell you otherwise. Every type of gaming is valid. But that said...would Hogwarts Mystery have worked better as a big console game like Legacy? It's hard to argue that it wouldn't.

Hogwarts Legacy has a lot of things that would have made HPHM better than it is. For instance, the leveling system. No more grinding for attributes, you just play normally. The combat system is more than just rock-paper-scissors, it's totally involved - and you can learn the Unforgivables! Sure, it's immersion breaking, but who cares? The player doesn't have to use them, it's their choice. And perhaps the most coveted change of all - the lack of the energy system. I say this all the time, but what really holds HPHM back is that stupid energy system. All those arbitrary timers that don't need to be there, forcing the player to stop and wait literal hours to pick up the game again. That's now how video games are supposed to work. Even if it's deliberately designed so that you can "pick it up throughout the day" guess what Jam City, players could still do that if we were so inclined, all you've done is force that play-style on us.

But there are advantages to HPHM as well. Features that it has and Legacy does not. First of all, the characters. From what I can see, HPHL has some incredible characters, but HPHM still wins due to the sheer number of them. Half the cast of Hogwarts Mystery is more memorable than the Legacy characters, with a couple of exceptions. (Sebastian, obviously.) Legacy does have brand new teacher characters, so that's working in it's favor, but again, the massive amount of student characters still gives the victory to Mystery. Not to mention, Mystery has a dating system. How many players would hop on the chance to date Sebastian? But it's not there. You know what else HPHM has that HPHL doesn't? Quidditch. Yeah, the Quidditch mini-game is simplistic and the story-line is frustrating, but at least there is Quidditch content in the game. Legacy offers nothing but the vague hope of (presumably paid) DLC in the future.

Frankly, that's a good segue into the greatest strength HPHM has over HPHL. Content. Hogwarts Mystery has seven years worth of content available for a player to experience. It may be a pain to get through because of the aforementioned energy system, but that's still six more years than Hogwarts Legacy is offering. Not to mention the quests. It should go without saying but Hogwarts Mystery has countless side quests and easily outmatches Hogwarts Legacy on that score. The only issue is, again, the arbitrary timing system. All of the most substantial quests in HPHM are TLSQs, and we're so often denied the chance to play or finish them because of how the game's "economy" works.

Hogwarts Mystery could have all of it's problems solved if it was adapted into a console game. It has so much content that if it was released on the same engine as Hogwarts Legacy...man, it wouldn't even be close. Mystery would blow legacy right out of the water.

#Harry Potter #Harry Potter: Hogwarts Mystery #Harry Potter: Hogwarts Legacy #HPHM Analysis #Video Games

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pradaksj · 5 years ago

Text

7 Rings | 03

♛ pairing: taehyung/reader

♛ rating: mature

♛ word count: 7,000+

♛ warnings for this chapter : light descriptions of anxious behavior (but nothing intense)

♛ summary: In desperate need of money, you and your best friend come up with a plan to infiltrate one of Seoul’s richest families, the Kim family. The plan was simple, garner some money and disappear, but of course things don’t always go as planned. Especially not with someone like Kim Taehyung.

━ ❝ Whoever said money can't solve your problems, must not have had enough money to solve 'em.❞

♛ chapter index/masterlist || series masterlist

Chapters⇢ 01 | 02 | 03 | 04 | 05 | 06 | 07 | 08

Present Day: Thursday Morning.

This was not supposed to happen, no, no, no. This was not what was planned, rehearsed, nor memorized. No, no, no!

You anticipate for him to scream, to snap at you and tell you off in front of everyone. It seemed fitting for someone like him to do, it’s what you expected.

You could feel all eyes on you, the venue itself had gone deaf silent, almost as if everyone else was holding their breath along with you, waiting to see your demise. You couldn’t blame them, you had spilled your drink on one of the most prestigious guests here, and though it wasn’t as if the world was going to end because of this, to you it felt like it. Your “mission” was going to end before it could even start.

Panic immediately overwhelms you. This was not at all how this was supposed to go. You wanted, no, you needed words to come out of your mouth, to say something, anything, but you couldn’t. Your mouth was completely frozen in place, and all you could do at the moment was stare at the big blob of red on his white buttoned up shirt, to which you were at fault for. Slowly you watch his mouth open, your mind immediately beginning to think the worst, but what comes out of his mouth completely surprises you.

He laughs.

The formation of a boxy smile takes its place on his face, his eyes now crinkling out of sheer laughter, and his hand now covering a portion of his face.

“I really didn’t mean to do that, oh my—” you finally blurt out, quickly grabbing a napkin and beginning to uselessly blot onto the already bleeding stain, but almost immediately feeling a hand grab at yours, stopping you from what you were doing.

“It’s okay, it’s okay,” he reassures, slowly pushing your hand away from his shirt.

You immediately shake your head, your words now faltering in cohesion, “No it’s not, I r-really didn’t mean to do that, I just—”

“And I’m telling you it’s okay,” he repeats himself, “I think you’ve done the most interesting thing around here in a very long time,” he whispers, sticking his hand out for you to shake, “I’m Taehyung,” he introduces himself, as if you didn’t know who he was.

The words themselves come out exactly like how Yuna would imitate during “rehearsal”. Though his voice was of course much deeper, almost reminding you of silk, seductive in it’s own way. You finally look up to see him, to actually see him face to face, immediately feeling your face get red.

It surprised you really, you had seen Kim Taehyung a countless number of times on TV, on several gossip blog headlines, posters, magazine covers, and an endless number of promotional advertisements all across Korea, but wow did they do him no justice. The man was truly stunning, and with every passing second you made eye contact with him, you could see why he was South Korea’s most sought out person.

From the sharp facial features, to the slightly sun-kissed skin that seemed to have its own natural glow, and his (what you assumed was permed) black softly-waved hair, made him in every way … dangerous. Kim Taehyung was dangerous, and you knew it. And it was important that you remembered that, because if you didn’t then things were not going to go as planned and quickly at that.

It took you, what felt like a whole hour, to finally process that his hand had been stuck out for who knows how long. “Get a grip of yourself y/n,” you thought to yourself, the only reason you were so nervous was because you knew what your intentions being here were, no one else here did.

“Don’t panic, breathe, recuperate, and adapt,” Yuna’s words rang in your head, as it was what she’d emphasize you do, just in case something went wrong or unplanned, “You are someone confident, you are someone poised, and most importantly you are someone rich,” she’d scold you, practically drilling the words into your head. You just hadn’t expected that you were going to have to use her advice this early on. “You got this,” you silently whisper to yourself, just breathe.

And so just as you saw him beginning to pull his hand back, you quickly grabbed it and began to shake it in return, “I’m y/n,” you nervously grin, “I’m so sorry about that, I just—” you faintly pause, “I guess you can say I just get shy around people I don’t know and well I just got so nervous,” you embarrassingly ramble on, pushing your hair behind your ear.

“Like I said it’s fine, really,” he says, looking down at the stain which for the most part was no longer as wet as before, now only damp in moisture, “It’s just a shirt really,” he chuckles.

“I know, but still,” you reiterate. You silently take a look around the venue. People had seemed to have quickly forgotten about what had transpired, going back to their regular day to day conversations without a care in the world, “It’s just that I’m new around here and well I just want to make a good impression on people,” you explain, your words clearly catching his attention.

“Oh, where are you from?” he harmlessly asks, genuine curiosity emitted from his tone.

“I’m from—”

The Day Before: Wednesday Evening.

“The United States?—No, No! Seoul! No! Uh—” you immediately feel the squirts of ice cold water on your face from Yuna’s plastic spray bottle, the twentieth time today.

“Wrong!” she scolds, spritzing you one more time for the heck of it causing Hoseok to burst out in fits laughter, for again, the twentieth time today.

You dramatically let out a huff of air in irritation, as well as pouting and crossing your arms in annoyance, “How many times do we have to go over this y/n!” Yuna screeches, grabbing her metal pointer stick, and harshly hitting the cheap whiteboard covered in red messy scribbles that you two bought the night before, “You’re from Seoul, but you moved with your rich old family to the states a couple of years ago, and you’re back here on vacation for the next ten weeks because you were “homesick”, which explains why he’s never seen you before in his life!” she explains, “What’s not clicking?” she says, now tapping her forehead with her index finger.

“You don’t have to be so mean about it,” you sneered.

“Well y/n! We can’t afford any mistakes, and it’s very important you know the basics because the moment he catches you in a lie, all bets are off on that money,” she sighs, her face now softening, “I know that right now you may think I’m being a bitch right now, but trust me, you’ll thank me later,” she snaps her head towards Hoseok’s direction, who for the past hour had been doing nothing but devouring snacks while watching the two of you bicker, “Am I right or wrong?” she asks, causing him to raise his hands as a way of saying he wanted no part in this.

You squint your eyes at him, “Maybe if we had more time, I’d be less strict about all this, but time is on the essence! Ten weeks will go by in the blink of an eye,” she adds, causing you to grunt because sadly she had a point, “So back to the top!” she yells, her facial expression going back to being firm, “Where are you from?”

You roll your eyes, “I’m from—”

Present Day

“Seoul, but you’ve stayed in the states, huh? That’s really cool, I’ve only been to LA and New York a couple of times for certain events… so what was your experience like over there?” he asks, taking a sip from his mimosa.

You don’t hesitate to answer, the response ingrained in your brain, “It was really nice, though I found myself being homesick quite often if we’re being honest,” he nods his head.

“Ah, yeah I completely get where you’re coming from, I—” he catches himself mid-sentence, shaking his head, as if disappointed with himself, “There’s just no place like Seoul huh,” he says instead, to which you nod in agreement.

You proceed in planting the seed to Yuna’s plan, “I have to go back in a couple of weeks though, I still have a year left to go for my bachelor’s, and well I’m really just here for visits sake,” you explain, your nerves slowly withering away. The more you spoke, the more natural things were beginning to feel, smooth and easy like melted butter on toast.

And in a way you weren’t entirely lying. You were going to have to leave at some point, you did have a year left in school, and technically you were just a temporary visitor in this whole world of the rich. Of course, there were some major differences between the truth and what you were leading him on to believe, but at the end of the day this wasn’t going to hurt anyone.

“Oh I see, what are you majoring in?” he politely asks, silently hoping he wasn’t intruding too much. Taehyung for the first time in a very long time, felt nervous. For one thing, you were very pretty, breathtakingly so, he almost felt like a kid with a schoolboy crush. It was quite embarrassing really.

But Taehyung was waiting. He was waiting for you to do something or say something that would confirm that you weren’t the person he’s hoping you to be, that you were in fact a stuck up brat just like the many he’d seen and met before. That you were just like anyone else here who solely cared for numbers, and their own personal riches. It was as if he was anticipating the feeling of disappointment.

“Business, accounting if we’re being specific,” you respond to his question, breaking him from his train of thought, “I’ve always been pretty good with numbers,” you say, “but not enough to become a full on STEM major or anything like that,” you joke, garnering a light chuckle from him, which you could easily tell was completely fake.

Maybe he was right, maybe you were just like the rest of them.

“I see, I see, I just finished my studies recently,” he comments, “I majored in finance though,” he says, which ultimately doesn’t surprise you. Not only because it seemed fitting for someone like him to get a bachelors in that field, but because you basically memorized his Wikipedia page as well. Supposedly having gotten into and graduating from SNU based on his own merit. Though you had your doubts of course, it was probably just best to keep your thoughts to yourself.

What you needed to focus on was getting him to ask you out on a date, considering an awkward silence on both ends had now arisen. A part of you was now severely worried about that date not happening anytime soon. Did you say something wrong? Maybe he wasn’t as interested in you anymore? Business is a pretty boring major, but it’s what Yuna told you to say, and well it is what you were actually majoring in. Maybe you should say something? No, just stick to the script. He isn’t saying anything though….

“Originally I wanted to major in photography,” you blurt out, catching him by surprise, “I was gonna minor in it, but being an accounting major was hard enough as it was, and well family pressure,” you say, your fingers tapping against the surface of the bar, “Nowadays it’s more of a hobby I do, here and there,” you say, curiosity now apparent on his face.

What you were telling him was in fact true, you loved photography, at one point even wanting to make a career out of it, but to become a professional photographer was hard enough as it was. In all honesty, you respected those who had the ability to confidently pursue their dreams. People like Yuna for example, who despite the risk of failing being high, never gave up. It was a risk you were unwilling to take, preferring a secured financial future over the latter.

“I especially like candid photography, there’s just something about it,” you ramble on, “it’s relaxing in a sense, like you learn to be more appreciative of what’s in front of you,” you gush, almost forgetting why you were talking about this topic to begin with.

Taehyung on the other hand looked at you with a grin on his face, finding your babbling amusing to say the least. It was in every way adorable.

“I have these binders at home filled with—” before you could continue on, the sound of a phone ringing interrupts. A look of annoyance now appears on Taehyung’s face, as he begrudgingly took out his phone from his pocket, hesitating to accept the phone call.

“You don’t mind if I—” you quickly nod your head, flashing him a superficial smile, as he momentarily stepped away from the bar.

You quickly took a sigh of relief once he was no longer in view, taking this as an opportunity to take a breather. Personally, you didn’t like this tense feeling, and you could imagine how much more heightened it’d be in these upcoming weeks. “Could it perhaps be … guilt?” you think to yourself, you quickly shake off the idea.

“I’m sorry about that,” you hear his voice, failing to hide the peeved look on his face.

“No, it’s fine, really,” you insist. A pregnant pause now in the air.

“I was hoping—”

“Are you—” both of your cheeks flushed in embarrassment.

“Oh my bad, what were you going to say?” you ask.

“No, you can go first,” he smiles.

“No, no, you go ahead,” you persist.

“You sure?” he asks, to which you nod in return.

“Well I have to go right now, attend to some personal errands and stuff,” he glances down at the stain, “also change out of this shirt,” he jokes, “but um,” he momentarily hesitates, “But I was hoping we could go out some time, grab some coffee or something.” Bingo. Step one, check. “I mean unless you don’t like coffee, I don’t know why I assumed you did, we can always get like smoothies or something, um,” he falters, his hand now scratching the back of his neck. “Hm cute,” you think to yourself.

“I was hoping you’d say that,” you grin, “I was going to say the same thing actually, but yes I would love to get coffee with you, ” you respond.

“Perfect! I was thinking maybe tomorrow evening, around 10AM? I’ll pick you up,” he states, the excitement clearly evident.

“Yeah, sounds great,” you giggle.

“I’ll see you tomorrow then,” he waves, before turning around and beginning to walk away. But after a couple of seconds he abruptly stops in his tracks and turns back around, causing you to genuinely laugh as you knew why he had stopped.

“I really forgot to ask for your number…” he facepalms himself.

Thursday Night.

“You had one job!” Yuna dramatically flails her arms around, she and Hoseok now having been filled in on everything that happened this morning.

“And I got it done, didn’t I?” you retort, causing Yuna to roll her eyes, mumbling a sassy “I guess” in return.

“You’re so lucky I don’t have my spraying bottle on me right now,” she jokes around, but a part of her was more likely than not actually serious about it.

“Anyways, I’m surprised he actually ended up going up to me after all,” you mused, “Didn’t think it’d actually work.”

“Well with what I had you wearing, of course he was going to go up to you little miss y/n! A ruched floral dress with a summer straw hat at an all white attire event? Do you have no faith in me woman! Actually no, have some faith in yourself!” she loudly lectures you, playfully hitting the side of your arm. “The bad posture was something you already had experience with on your own merit,” she teases, causing her to start dying of laughter at her own joke.

You scowl in return, “Ha. Ha. Ha. Very funny,” you grumble out, subconsciously fixing your posture.

“Anyways, what was the famous Kim Taehyung like? Is he really the heartthrob everyone makes him out to be,” Hoseok chimes in, his chin resting against his hand, eager to know the more about your encounter, “Come on, I need details, not no flimsy recap.”

“Um…” you hesitate with your next choice of words, “he’s um..” how could you describe Taehyung? He certainly wasn’t what you thought he was going to be like, “He’s a,” you pause, the two in front of you now looking at you with eager eyes, “He’s a nice guy… for now at least,” you conclude, surprising both Hoseok and Yuna alike. “I—” you sigh, “I think apart of me, like a very little tiny part is already starting to feel gu—”

“Ah! Don’t you even say it!” Yuna interjects.

“You didn’t let me finish!” you scold, immediately causing Yuna’s mouth to go shut. “Though a small part of me does feel guilty,” you pause, “at the end of the day Kim Taehyung is nothing but a rich boy with a grand old penthouse, flashy cars, and has enough money that could last him for several lifetimes. His father is a multi millionaire tycoon who from what I’ve heard exploits people for his own personal gain. Two sides of the same fucking coin. And so maybe right now he may seem like some nice guy, but it’s probably all an act. I’m not the bad guy here, I know I’m not. And I’ll be damned to let anyone, even if it’s myself, convince me otherwise, not with what I have at stake,” you finish off, staring at the invoices which were held up by magnets on your refrigerator, a reminder of what you were doing all of this for.

Kim Taehyung is nothing more than a pawn in a game of chess, and it was your job to make sure he stayed in that position. Nothing more, nothing less.

Earlier That Day.

“You called me?” Taehyung enters his father’s office, still feeling aggravated at the sudden interruption from earlier. His father doesn’t even bother to look up from his pile of papers, only making a quick motion at Taehyung to sit down on the arm chair placed across his desk.

The sound of silence filled the room, as his father continued to scribble down who knows what, on his sheets of papers, clearly focused on what was in front of him which only bothered Taehyung more. “Was there a point to all of this?” he thought to himself.

“Yes there is,” his father suddenly said, causing Taehyung to straighten up, not realizing that he must’ve said what he was thinking aloud. He finally looks up to face Taehyung, the stern look he always had on, well placed on his face. He quickly pulls open his drawer and grabs what seems to be a magazine out, smacking it on his desk for Taehyung to see. He sighs, “So you care to explain what this is all about?”

The title, in a big bold yellow colored font, reads, “Kim Taehyung Gets Physical With Paparazzi, Trouble in Paradise?” accompanied by a collage of photos which included Taehyung post physical-assault on the paparazzo and his argument with Sunhi, all painting him as some kind of villain. Taehyung remained silent, instead avoiding eye contact, only causing his father to let out a sardonic laugh, his frustration clearly evident.

“Ah Taehyung,” he starts off, “I feel like we’ve had this conversation many, many, times,” he lets out another sarcastic chuckle, “and I have to say, you had me fooled when you told me you were ready to come back,” he continuously taps his fingers on his desk in a rhythmic pattern.

“You don’t get—”

“I don’t care for the sob stories Taehyung, I really don’t,” he interrupts, finally snapping, “In fact I have staff telling me that is was Sunhi who cheated on you, something along those lines,” he mumbles, “What you do on your free time, or who you’re seeing is really none of my concern,” he pauses, “until it has the potential to affect my business, and the image it upholds,” he clarifies.

“I know,” Taehyung hisses.

“Then those little antics you used to like to pull off shouldn’t be making a return,” he narrows his eyes at his son, “because we all know the results of those,” he harshly reminds him, causing Taehyung to ball his fist in anger, “So I suggest you get a hold of yourself, quickly at that, so that I don’t have to clean up your messes like before,”

“You don’t have to remind me every waking fucking moment,” Taehyung harshly says, getting up from the chair. His father is quick to do the same, the two now facing each other, the desk being their only barrier.

“And who the hell do think you’re talking to like that,” his father spits, “It was me who got you out of that mess that night, hell if it weren’t for me you’d be behind prison bars at this very moment,” Taehyung looks away, his eyes now watering, “You should be nothing but grateful,” Taehyung quickly wipes the tear that uncontrollably rolls down his cheek. The feeling of shame now overshadowing the feeling of anger he originally felt. He attempts to take deep breaths, anything to prevent himself from looking any more like a coward. He didn’t want to cry, no he refused to cry, especially not in front of his father.

“A house made of glass trying to throw brick stones,” his dad scoffs, “Ironic really,” a vile smirk now on his face, “just get out my sight already, consider this a warning,” he concludes before sitting back down and continuing his work, acting as if nothing had happened. Taehyung stood there for what felt like forever, his eyes still brimmed with tears, before silently making his way out into the hall.

“Don’t cry. Don’t cry,” he kept telling himself as he made his way down to the lobby, but it was hard. He could feel the lump in his throat waiting to be let out, as well as how his lip would quiver whenever he’d force himself to smile at the several staff members who would politely greet him. It was almost as if he was suffocating.

He unlocked his car door and made his way inside, immediately punching the steering wheel in subdued frustration. He looked at himself from the car mirror, staring at his red puffy eyes, still refusing to allow himself to cry despite being alone. Instead he took more deep breaths, once again tucking away the turmoil he’d been feeling for a very long time back into the depths of his heart.

Turning on the ignition of his car, he made his way out of the building’s parking lot, quickly shaking off what had happened. He had a date to look forward to tomorrow morning, and he wasn’t going to let anyone ruin that.

Friday Morning.

“Ta da!” Yuna shimmys her hands, proud of the outfit she’s ensembled. She was definitely making use of Mrs. Choi’s closet, “You don’t think this is a little too much?” you question, feeling slightly insecure about what you were wearing, the tan beret on your head slowly becoming crooked. This was definitely better than anything you’d pick on your own for a morning cup of coffee, that was for sure.

“Oh of course not!” Yuna exclaims while quickly fixing your hair, “Now put this on top of the turtle neck,” she says, passing you a brown plaid double-breasted coat, “and then,” she glances at the two bags in her hands, debating which color would look best before ultimately picking the cream colored cross-bag, “put this over it.”

She claps her hands together, clearly proud of her fashion sense. “The perfect outfit for your date, doesn’t she look so pretty Hobi?” she gushes. Hoseok looks up from his phone, the three of you were now on a nickname basis.

“So she does,” he smiles, “but maybe a black bag might fit the outfit better,” Yuna’s eyebrows quickly furrow.

“Hey leave the fashion to me, computer boy!” Yuna playfully squints her eyes at him.

“I’m just saying! A white turtleneck and a cream colored bag isn’t the look you think it is.”

“Yeah well,” she puckers her lips like a kid, unable to think of anything to counter with, she instead says, “that uniform you’re wearing is ugly!” causing a dramatic offended look to appear on his face.

“Oh I’ll have you know—”

“Will you two stop with the bickering?” you interrupt him before he could attack in return, “Taehyung is going to get here any moment, and you,” you point at Yuna, “need to start heading to work, while you,” you point to Hoseok, “need to get back to work,” you reaffirm, silencing the two who were now staring at you like lost puppies, “Well what are you waiting for, shoo!” you commanded, your statement coming off a little more harsher than you intended, but you blamed it on your nerves. You couldn’t help it because well, you were indeed very nervous.

“Ah okay, okay. Let us know how it goes!” Yuna says, before dragging Hoseok by the arm and leading eachother out. “And remember to stay calm and collective!” he shouts before being yanked on by Yuna.

You let out a deep breath of air. You hadn’t been on a date in a very long time, and though one could consider this a “fake” date on your part, it was a date nonetheless. You needed to leave a good impression, enough that he'd be willing to take you out again after today.

[From: Taehyung]

[9:55] Hey, I’m around the corner from the address you texted me :) I should be outside in like 2 mins

[9:55] i'm in the black mercedes benz btw

[To: Taehyung]

[9:55] perfect ☺️ i’ll be out right now then.

You fix your hair one last time, making sure everything looked perfect. “It’s not a date, just two strangers getting coffee together,” you reassure yourself one last time before making your way out.

The car ride to the coffee shop per se wasn’t awkward, but formal to say the least. Of course, Taehyung didn’t exactly expect you to immediately be talkative once you stepped into the car, but judging by how stiff you remained the whole car ride, and the lack of conversation there was, he also knew that he didn’t want you to feel timid to talk or as if you had to hold yourself back in front of him. He wanted things to feel natural, like how you were when you were talking about photography, where he could tell you were genuinely just being yourself.

Honestly he was used to women usually going out of their way to show off in front of him, or to make themselves seem like someone they weren’t simply to impress him, so this was definitely... different than what he was used to. But for some reason it made him even more curious to get to know you, eager to see what you were hiding behind that brick wall of an exterior you’ve seemed to have set up for yourself. He assumed it was going to take time for you to warm up to him, but the problem was that Taehyung wasn’t much of a patient person to begin with.

“After you,” he says, politely opening the door to the coffee shop for you. You whisper “thank you” to the small, but kind gesture.

The coffee shop in itself was very cute. From the cushioned cream-colored loveseats decorated by pillows you’d find overpriced on Wayfair, to the bright lighting provided by a massive roof skylight, and lastly the wooden bookshelves decorated with a variety of different novels, all which gave the coffee shop a very pleasant home-like feeling to it. If you could describe it in one word it’d be “warm”.

You stood there like a lost child for a moment, unsure of what to order as you studied the menu. They had a variety of drinks, things you were sure you had never even heard of, either that or they just had a fancy way of describing everything in order to boost up the price. “So any idea on what you want?” he asks.

“Um,” honestly you really weren’t much of a coffee drinker, having ordered the same drink at Starbucks for the past several years, “Surprise me,” you awkwardly smile, before making your way (practically running) to a wooden table next to a window view.

You were definitely peeved with yourself because you knew that you needed to stop being so damn quiet because God was that car ride awkward, insufferable almost. But you just weren’t good at this kind of stuff, never had been.

Even during high school when you had gone on your first ever official date, you ended having an utter meltdown in the restroom after your date awkwardly pointed out that you had a piece of spinach stuck in between your teeth, a waitress on break had to comfort you before you could even step out again. Even then you had your mouth glued shut afterward, paranoid about embarrassing yourself again.

And that wasn’t the only embarrassing incident you’ve encountered in past dates, there had been plenty more, but that would take a hefty amount of time to talk about.

Point was, you’d always find yourself acting like a turtle hiding in its shell or like a pufferfish, blurting out the most random and embarrassing things at any given moment. It was always one or the other and it always left you with a humiliating story to tell Yuna, a prime example being accidently spilling your drink on the son of a multimillionaire. You kept anxiously bouncing your leg as you watched him order at the cashier register, thinking of ways to start a conversation.

“I got you a heavenly toffee, it’s an espresso with toffee nut syrup, caramel cream, almond milk, and whipped cream,” he places the drink on the table for you, “I figured you could never go wrong with something sweet,” he smiles.

“Oh wow,” you say, genuinely delighted with his choice, “their mugs are so pretty,” you quietly comment, observing the intricate design on the ceramic mug.

“Yeah it’s definitely one of my favorite coffee shops in the area, I also recommend this one called Seoul’s Magnificent Mocha, they have good drinks as well,” he chuckles, recalling his last visit there.

“Well if I’m being completely honest, I’ve never been too enthusiastic for coffee, but,” you take a sip of the drink in front of you, “I have to say this is really good,” you laugh, pleasantly surprised at the sweetness of the drink, you could hardly even taste the bitterness of the coffee.

“So y/n, tell me a little bit about yourself,” he says while taking a sip of his own coffee.

“Oh well hm—” you try to recall the things Yuna would tell you to say, but with Taehyung intensely staring at you, your mind had gone completely blank, “well,” you felt your face getting red at the pressure you felt, your ears definitely feeling hot, “there’s not much to say really. I’m a pretty boring person,” you let out a very awkward chuckle, looking down in embarrassment.

“Don’t say that,” he says, “we could start off with something simple, like,” he looks up for a moment in thought, “what’s your favorite color?”

“Yellow,” you simply state, no commentary, no “What about yours”, no nothing, Yuna would probably squirt you with her bottle 100 times if she was there. Your brain was having a “we threw out his name” moment from Spongebob. Nothing but fire and chaos going on in there.

“Oh…” he pressed his lips together, slightly disheartened at your lack of enthusiasm. Was there something wrong with him? Maybe he was just badgering too much? Before he could dwell on it too long, the sound of a camera flashing caught both his and your attention.

“Oh no,” you quickly think to yourself, immediately turning away from the window in order to cover your face. Taehyung didn’t bother to question as to why you had turned so quickly because he was quick to do the same. Your reason being was that you couldn’t afford to land on the front cover of a magazine or appear on a gossip channel because the moment your mom saw from her hospital bed, it’d be a wrap for you.

“Damn it,” he groaned, “I thought it’d be too early for them to follow me out here,” he says. Honestly, Taehyung didn’t mind the paparazzi taking pictures of him, at this point he was used to it. But what he didn’t want was to put you in the spotlight with no say on your part, especially knowing how stalkerish the paparazzi could be. The moment they got a clear identity as to who you were, you’d be followed until the end of time, and he would definitely feel guilty for that.

“We gotta get out of here before more of them arrive,” he cursed, “Just don’t look back,” he directs, slowly turning his head back to see if he could spot where the person taking pictures was. “Alright the guy seems to be planted from afar, so I think we can walk out the entrance, just make sure you cover your face with your hand or something or you could use your beret,” he jokes around. “You don’t gotta tell me twice,” you think to yourself.

You nod at his directions, the two of you quickly getting up and putting your mugs away, before speed walking back to the car. You could only cross your fingers that a clear photo of you wasn’t taken.

Taehyung quickly zoomed out of the area, but despite his efforts, everytime he glanced at his rear-view mirror he could spot the black van still following him, which only put him in a bad mood.

“I’m gonna have to drop you off at the back or something, or else you’ll find men always outside your building for the rest of your trip until they find out who exactly are you,” Taehyung scowled, mad at himself for being so careless. You wordlessly nod your head, a little intimidated at how angry he looked.

The car ride back to your place is quiet, nothing different than the car ride to the coffee shop. “I’m sorry,” he exhales once you guys are outside the building, “I should’ve been more careful,” he mutters, internally scolding himself.

You shake your head in disagreement, “Trust me, it’s fine, it’s expected really,” you mumble, your words causing him to feel a slight sting to the heart. Though he didn’t even know you well enough for your words to genuinely hurt, for some reason they did.

“Well I’ll text see you some other time Taehyung,” you formally bow your head, getting out of the car, and quickly walking into Mr. Choi's building, leaving him taken aback by your words. One could say he was looking into your word choice a little too much, but no, he knew exactly what you meant. And so with that he left feeling disheartened.

“So how’d it go?” Hoseok catches you right as you enter the elevator.

“Horrible, it went horrible,” you state, the elevator doors closing before you could say anything else.

Saturday Morning.

“Your kimchi came out way too salty,” your mom criticizes, taking a bite of the food you’ve brought, “should've added root vegetable or something,” she shakes her head in dismay. She expects you to fire back with a remark, but instead she watches as you just sit in the hospital chair, eating your food in pout.

Today was your visiting day, and though you tried to hide your dismay at yesterday’s date when talking to your mom, it kept popping up in the back of your mind like an annoying itch. Of course your mom had noticed your odd behavior from the moment you walked in, but for you to be eating in pout meant that whatever it was that was on your mind, must've really been bothering you.

“Now are you gonna care to explain why you’re feeling so down,” she questions, “or are you going to keep sulking in your seat,” she chuckles.

You wrinkle your nose, “It’s nothing ma,” you try deflecting the conversation, your gaze wandering to the TV.

“Ah so it’s about a boy,” she laughs, causing your head to snap in her direction, a puzzled look now on your face.

“And what makes you so sure?”

She shrugs, “Because I’m your mom and I’ve seen that look many times,” she grabs the remote from the hospital’s bed stand, subsequently turning off the TV, “come on, I’m in cool mom mode now,” she cringely says, causing you to roll your eyes.

“Oh god,” you mumble, loudly sighing before beginning, “so there’s this boy,” you start off.

“I knew it,” she sings, jokingly winking at you.

“I went on a date with him the other day and well I don’t know, I tensed up, you know how I get,” you explain, downwarding your gaze to the floor in shame as you recalled your behavior from the day before.

“Mm,” she hums, sounding unconvinced, “well there must be a reason as to why you got so tensed up, and I’m sure you know why,” she deadpans, her face now becoming stern. So much for being in “cool mom” mode.

“Well I don’t—”

“No, no, no, I’m not accepting your excuses,” she vigorously shakes her head.

You sigh, “I just,” you pause, remembering that you needed to be careful with your words, “I just really want him to like me that’s all.”

“And?”

You groan, “And well I feel like I have to act a certain way or be a certain way in order for him to like me,” you explain, “and I just don’t think I have it in me. I don’t think he’s the type of person to like me, well for me, I guess you can say he’s like the popular kid in those high school movies, you know?” you let out a dry laugh knowing that the situation was much more than that.

“Well can you tell me a little about this boy?” she quieres, grabbing a strand of your hair and beginning to play with it.

“Well I’m not going to give you details because for all I know we might end up bad,” you say, making an excuse so that you wouldn't have to give a name, “but this guy, well he’s been told to have a reputation. He’s selfish, he’s reckless, he’s rude, and the only person he cares for is himself,” you rant, your mother now seeming taken aback by your description.

“Is that what people tell you, or is that what you think?” she laughs, “because the way you just said that, it seems like those are your personal feelings about him, and so I can’t help but wonder why you would want to go out with someone like that,” she wonders. “Oh honey, you have no idea why,” you think to yourself.

“Well because that’s what people like him are, that’s what they’ve always proven themselves to be, it’s what—”

“You assume he’s going to be like,” she cuts you off, her tone now dismissive.

“It’s what I know he’s going to be like,” you retaliate, crossing your arms like a little kid, causing her to laugh.

“Oh y/n y/n y/n,” she continues playing with your hair, “I want you to listen to what I have to say, okay? And then once I’m done, you can either take my advice to the heart, or let it go in one ear and out the other, alright?” you hum in response.

“Okay so the first thing I want to talk about,” she clears her throat, “is that it’s wrong of you to make assumptions about this person, or anyone in general.”

“I know but—”

“Ah, what’d I tell you about listening. You didn’t let me finish,” she scolds, gently tugging the strand of hair she was playing with, “I want you to go on another date with him, but open minded this time y/n. No preconceived notions, no overanalyzations of the things he does so that you can make him fit into the mold you’ve made for him, no nothing, and the same goes for you,” she takes a sip of her water bottle, giving you a chance to quickly say something.

“But ma, the girls I’ve seen him date in the past, I’m,” you sigh, “I’m nothing like them,” her eyebrows immediately furrow.

“And who said you had to be anything like them?” she grabs your hand, causing you to quietly stare at her, “but this leads to my second point. No more putting pressure on yourself to be someone you’re not,” she softly nudges your shoulder, “Just give him one genuine chance, just one, and if it’s not meant to be then it’s not meant to be,” she says, finishing her little speech.

“But I want him to like me,” your voice cracks, desperately wanting to replace the word “want” with “need”.

“Hey don’t cry,” she chuckles, quickly pulling you in for a hug, “Trust me y/n, as long as you be yourself, any boy who's lucky enough to get to know you will fall in love. I promise you that.” she softly whispers into your ear. And with her words you could immediately feel the pressure come off your shoulders, the words not only comforting, but hitting home. “Okay so I need you to promise me that the next time you see him, it’ll be a fresh new slate for both him and you, alright? Shake off, whatever you have on your mind, and just enjoy what’s in front of you.”

“Okay,” you breathe out, deciding that your mom was right, things needed to change, and you were going to do just that.

Saturday Night.

“So how did that coffee date of yours go?” Namjoon mentions, causing Taehyung to frown at the memory.

“If I’m being honest, not that well,” he sighs, pouring himself a glass of whiskey from his alcohol shelf.

Namjoon’s face scrunches in confusion, “Well, what went wrong this time?” he laughs.

Taehyung shrugs, trying his best to seem unfazed, “I don’t know, I guess she just wasn’t that into me,” he comments on you lightly, “Maybe it was for the best, I don’t really have time for another relationship anyway, not with my busy schedule,” he says, taking a sip from his drink.

“Busy schedule, but you had the time to go get coffee immediately the next day after meeting her, with no second thought? Yeah that makes sense,” Namjoon teases, causing Taehyung to roll his eyes.

“Like I said, I don’t know, she just was not budging, it was like speaking to a brick wall the whole time, and I’m sure if the paparazzi hadn’t interrupted it would have remained like that the whole time,” he sneers while pushing his hair back, “which is weird cause I don’t know there was just something about her, I just can’t describe it, but I just know she was holding back.” he explains, causing Namjoon to snort, “But anyways, it’s my fault, I set my expectations too high, thinking I was going to find love at first sight, actually no I blame you for putting those thoughts into my head.”

Namjoon raises his hands in defense, “Hey, all I did was pressure you to go up to her, everything else was your own head’s doing.”

“Yeah I guess you’re right, I’m just gonna be a lone wolf for a —” the sound of a “ding” interrupts Taehyung before he could complete his sentence, and so he checks his phone to see who could’ve texted him.

Namjoon stares at Taehyung who was now intently staring at his phone, looking quite flabbergasted, “Well, what is it?” he questions, a goofy grin now slowly appearing on the wavy haired young man’s face.

“I,” he lets out a chuckle, “I think I’m going on a date tomorrow night,” he faintly blushes, turning his phone to show Namjoon the text he just read, which reads:

[From: y/n]

[9:02 PM] you + me, tomorrow @ 5:30 , Ilsan lake park, i’ll bring what we need.

[9:02 PM] yes or yes?? 😇

[To: y/n]

[9:03 PM] i’ll see you then 😅

a/n 🧚🏻 : did I mention this is slow burn???? LOL. originally I was going to include date #2 on here because I only want this series to be a max of like 8-10 chapters, butttt I also wanted to update so ... but all the buildup will (hopefully) be worth itttt. the smut is coming soon in other words LMAO. I also took a while to update bc I was trying not to make y/n too annoying and just make the characterization how I pictured it to be, like I needed to establish the generalization she has on the Taehyung but IDK lmk what you think, message me, comment, send an anon, anything is welcome 🤍

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breadknight-likes-things · 5 years ago

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Bread’s Game Journal 06/06/20: Wrath In The Frozen North: A Northrend Retrospective, Part 7: The Storm Peaks

The Storm Peaks are, frankly, one of the least memorable zones in Northrend for me, but that doesn’t mean they’re bad, nor does it mean I don’t have some fond memories of the place! Notably, unlike....every other expansion (Except Cataclysm) Wrath of The Lich King gave you flying before max level, because without it, there’s no way to actually get around these final two zones. Especially not The Storm Peaks, I don’t think you could navigate any part of this zone on foot if you tried!

I remember being really excited to get Cold Weather Flying (as the game called unlocking the ability of Flight in Northrend) because back then, Flight still seemed like this bold new ability to explore the world. It’s clear, though, that Blizzard has had something of a change of heart in recent years on the entire concept of flying mounts. By locking their use in new expansions behind damn near hundreds of hours of grinding, they’re implicitly saying they think putting the system in place to begin with was a mistake, which is such a far cry from the way The Storm Peaks is designed around their use!

Now if this was Elder Scrolls Oblivion, you could just diagonally walk up those cliff faces, but alas.

Here is a zone that’s built entirely around the concept of the flying mount. All high peaks, low valleys, and no easy way to move between any of them without simply flying above everything (we’d see this concept utilized similarly, but wildly different in tone, in Icecrown). The entire zone is also very noticeably based around The Titans and Ulduar. When I was originally playing Wrath, I didn’t expect Blizzard to lean as hard into the Old God part of the plot as they did, in fact at some points it almost seemed like the threat of Yogg-Saron was suddenly what the expansion pack was all about. Never mind that whole “Lich King” guy we’ve been worrying about this whole time! Blizzard really loves their “Actually, the bad guy was this old god the whole time!” twists don’t they? Y’sharjj, Yogg-Saron......N’Zoth...man we just keep going huh?

As far as my own, personal memories go for The Storm Peaks I’ll list them out, and you guys tell me the amount of hellish mental anguish they cause you: 1. Never finding the Time Lost Proto Drake. 2. 60% Flight Speed. 3. That’s it, just those two. That damn Proto Drake caused people to lose their minds! He was a rare spawn that would, ideally, patrol a set path, and anyone that killed him would then get him as a mount! Problem of course being, he was incredibly rare to even see to begin with, and you bet your ass you were not the only person looking for him. Making matter worse, this was firmly in the days of highly restrictive tagging. If someone got a single hit off on him before you did, they got all the credit, loot, even experience for the monster, no matter how much you did or didn’t help past that point. I can’t believe that tagging system lasted as long as it did!

I did not take this screenshot myself, because that would imply I EVER ACTUALLY SAW THIS GUY!

The other trauma this place loved to inflict on people was it’s sheer size and verticality, which, if you had a full speed flying mount, was nothing....but if you were still stuck with your old pal “60% flying speed”....yikes. I vividly remember navigating around this zone on the back of my standard speed flying mount was an actual nightmare. It took what felt like forever to do anything! I don’t know how much of this was just me not having Epic Flying in a time so many others had already acquired it, but I remember this being a huge deal for me. Thankfully, with the extreme affordability of flying speed increases in the game at this point, this will simply not be a problem for anyone ever again to begin with.

I know I didn’t talk a ton about the design, or the lore, of Storm Peaks but again, to be honest, it’s never been a very engaging zone to me. Among all the locations of Northrend it’s usually the one I just never really bother to go to anymore. I suppose it was more of a time and place zone, it was interesting in 2008 because it gave us some more insight into lore we knew little about. It was our first real experience with The Titans after all, but so far into the future as we are, where we’ve both directly met some of them and learned that Azeroth herself is a baby titan, it’s stingy dole-outs of lore just seems antiquated!

Bread’s Coveted “Best Town” Award: K3

Leave to the Goblins to show up in the most difficult place to navigate in the world, and set up another one of their weird little towns. Still, it’s such a respite from the environment that I’ve often wondered just how satisfying it must be to be inside that inn, knowing how dangerous and cold everything outside really is!

Random Screenshot Of The Day:

Kratos should be showing up to take part in some wholesale slaughter any minute here.

Stray Notes:

- Wrong zone, but I just remembered this one time I saw a pages long Gamefaqs thread of people angrily arguing whether a quest name in Borean Tundra was or wasn’t a Call of Duty reference because it had the phrase “We are leaving” in it. The internet is a nightmare.

- I didn’t even mention that Storm Peaks is the zone that finally solved the mystery of what happened to Muradin Bronzebeard after seemingly “dying” in Warcraft 3.....but also.....I’ll be honest, how much does anybody actually remember about Muradin Bronzebeard?

#video games #World of Warcraft #wow #world of warcraft shadowlands #world of warcraft wrath of the lich king #wotlk #wow wotlk #lich king #the storm peaks #pc gaming #Activision Blizzard #Blizzard #retrospective #world of warcraft retrospective #bread #breads game journal #bread's game journal

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allbeendonebefore · 6 years ago

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Hey hapo what's with the sea of blue in sask and Alberta during the election like did Sheer make that good of an impression on Sask voters??? NDP is option??

sea of blue you say? obviously we created our own blue sea since we’re not allowed access to tidewater JKJKJKJK

this is a really complicated question and I’m trying to think about how best to explain it. my feelings on the issue are very mixed because i feel like i have a foot or a hand in several camps like some convoluted twister game. it’s something that a lot of identity and emotion is tied up in for a lot of people and it’s rooted very firmly in inequalities that have existed for over a century and get expressed differently in different regions. It’s something that I grew up saturated in and I’ve done a lot of reading about (and of course there’s always more on my reading list) but I’ll try and highlight a few reasons that I’ve been musing about so as not to be too overwhelming.

it’s something that is really hard to explain to people from outside the province because we’re quick to be written off (sometimes rightfully so, others not) but it’s something that’s equally hard to explain to people inside the province. As I said it’s something we’re all saturated in, we are born into it or we grow up in it and it’s really hard to confront a lot of things surrounding it. And I definitely have my own biases and background and relation to this issue and I must stress that as furious as I am with people in large groups making dumb ass decisions, I can’t be angry at individuals because I get a lot of why this happens even though I find it personally misguided or ignorant at best and actively harmful, selfish, and self-sabotaging at worst. But when I explain this I hope it makes sense why for a lot of people it feels like the only option.

And my last preface is that I am speaking from an Alberta perspective, if my followers in Saskatchewan want to add on to this please feel free. I’m glossing over a lot here because I’m trying to keep this short and understandable… but when have I ever done that lol.

Yeah, it got long.

so why does the west go conservative. it’s not scheer, and if you remember harper you’ll remember personality is never high on our list of priorities. [insert gif of harper explaining how he too is a human who watches netflix here]

1. History

To sum up two hundred years: Alberta and Saskatchewan were never equal partners in confederation with other provinces. They were purchased and carved up by the Canadian government which then imposed the two party system on the provinces, which prior had consensus government which (i believe) was similar to how NWT and Nunavut continue to operate. They were not given the rights to their own resources until decades after joining confederation. They were given Liberal governments because the Liberals were and are considered the “natural” governing party of Canada, and while Saskatchewan has flopped between Liberal and Conservative governments like many eastern provinces, Alberta has always had a radical streak and has NEVER re-elected an unseated party in its history. And no, I don’t consider the UCP a continuation of the previous 4 decades of conservative rule, even though they imagine themselves to be the inheritors of that legacy.

Fast forward to the direct impacts: in the 70s, world events that severely impacted oil production caused Eastern Canada to absolutely panic and force Alberta and Saskatchewan (yet again) into providing discounts on their production to soften the blow in Ontario and Quebec of rising prices, forbidding them to sell for a profit to the United States. This included both oil products and potash, hugely lucrative products in AB and SK. It was a continuation of Eastern Canada imagining and treating the prairies as property, as chattel, where provinces like Quebec and BC would never be asked to undersell to benefit the rest of the country.

The current federal conservative party is an amalgamation of reactions to this situation and related ones: the Progressive party (which was a complete misnomer) originated in Manitoba, the Reform party emerged from what I understand as the “first wave” of western separatism, and even though Reform was defeated federally it is still a direct ancestor to Stephen Harper and by extension Andrew Scheer. Harper’s policies are the natural product of decades of conservative governments dating back to Preston and Earnest Manning’s Social Credit party in Alberta.

That said, people from both inside and outside the provinces completely misunderstand Harper’s (and Kenney’s) “Western-ness” or “Albertan-ness”. Both of them ran on western issues and appear to speak up for western interests, but those issues and interests only go as far as the CEOs of the oil companies are concerned, not the working class in the industry. Harper and Kenney actively undermined the equalization formula for the west and had the gall to campaign on striking a good deal for the west. Federal politicians do not have to ever strike a good deal for the west, they will ALWAYS prioritize voters in Ontario and Quebec so long as our voting system remains this way.

2. Identity

My next point in the long agonizing question of Why This is a sensitive one. In Alberta we have my parent’s generation who were voting age at the toppling of Social Credit by Lougheed’s Conservatives. For Alberta this was a monumental shift in taking no shit from Ottawa that people still look back on. Lougheed was a hero for demanding a fair price from Canada for Alberta, and he was incredibly concerned with managing the resource and the profits wisely. While conservative governments were natural and long standing in eastern Canada, this was the first time they had taken power in Alberta and they made a dramatic and revolutionary impression, which is not a thing that conservative governments are usually known to do.

My parent’s generation remembers this time of intense prosperity. My parent’s generation raised their children in this boom-bust cycle and my parent’s generation watched as Lougheed’s heritage fund was spent out from under us. I grew up under Ralph Klein’s government- intensely popular for a premier and who’s legacy was as powerful as Lougheed’s, but incredibly polarizing. He gave $300 to every man, woman and child in the province (except my fam because we had just moved back and didn’t have residency, lol) which was memorable if irresponsible. But it was men like Klein who had the charisma and the presence to make people really take pride in the industry, to worship the boom-bust, and to consider all problems solved. Klein did not give a shit about the part of Alberta I grew up in, and friends who lived in the far north of the province fared even worse. It’s absolutely no wonder that the Edmonton area consistently votes “against” the rest of the province when we were left isolated and broken during the bust of the 90s and ignored repeatedly in the mid to late 2000s.

I have a deep seated and extreme resentment for Ralph Klein’s government and it’s not because I missed out on my 300 Ralph Bucks or because I don’t have connections to the industry, it’s because I grew up with a deep seated fear that I wouldn’t be able to complete my education or that if I got sick something horrible would happen. I was legitimately terrified I would not be able to make it to secondary school because of the cuts his government made on rural schools, and for friends of mine who were not as lucky and well supported as I was, it was even worse. I won’t drag their personal stories onto the internet to make my point, but know

But the point of this all is that the people alive today who vote are people who remember this time of prosperity, of fighting Ottawa, and of relative ‘freedom’ from taxation and so on and so forth are constantly trying to hold onto that time. The kids in my generation who I went to school with did not have to graduate high school - my school had a 70% drop out rate because people would go straight to the patch or into a related industry. In Alberta, every industry is a related industry. There is not an aspect of living in Alberta that the patch doesn’t touch. This is hard to understand for people outside the province. It was actual culture shock to me to come to Ontario where funders of schools and businesses are families that date back to confederation rather than Enbridge or Suncor.

Moreover, the people who work in the patch do an incredibly difficult and dangerous job for incredible amounts of money and it’s no wonder they are so valourized. The people who work in the patch are more dependent on the companies than they are on the government. During the fire of 2016, it may have been the government providing evacuation stations, but it was the companies who got people out. Working class people feel seriously undervalued and are obviously seriously defensive about the industry for real, concrete reasons.

The past four decades have shaped generations of people in this way. This is not something easily reversed. Voting conservative is almost inextricable from Albertan identity and it’s impossible to explain concisely. We all grow up with the same arguments and talking points, we are all imbued with anger and defensive remarks from birth, and to people outside the province our arguments can sound rehearsed to the point of sounding cult-like. Stop Using Plastic If You Don’t Like It. Stop Driving and Flying. Stop Importing from Dictatorships. Stop Being a Hypocrite. They are easy, simple mantras to absolve anyone related to the industry (which is everyone) of any guilt because they don’t have to be a hypocrite if they just embrace the reality. There is no room for any critical thought in this identity, there is no room for discussion, there is nothing beyond Don’t Ask Don’t Tell and Don’t Ever Criticize What Keeps Everything Running. It’s normal and natural to feel upset when people who don’t grow up with this line of thinking find it strange.

3. Alienation

So why doesn’t our valourization of the working class translate directly into NDP votes? Why does Rachel Notley become vilified for speaking and acting as Peter Lougheed did in the 1970s? Why do we continue voting conservative and say thank you when they betray us and kick us in the balls every single time? Why do we cover up our oh-so-shameful history of birthing the CCF/NDP out of the desperation and destitution of the Great Depression?

As I’ve been saying it’s complicated, but it’s also really simple. No federal party ever speaks to us. Not a single one. The conservatives barely have to because they know our identity as conservative dates back to before a time when we even had a provincial upper-case Conservative government ourselves. Scheer can parade up and down parliament hill with his appeals to free speech and his pro life base and his white supremacist dogwhistles all he likes because he knows keeping Alberta and Saskatchewan “happy” (read: angry) is easy. This is a man who said himself that he doesn’t need ‘indian votes’ to win and he certainly was far more worried about keeping Doug Ford out of the spotlight during his campaign and pissing off Ontario than he was about us, and premier kenney spent all his time in office campaigning for scheer instead of running the goddamn province, including preparing us for an emergency. And we lap it up while screaming bloody murder if rachel notley is not personally handing out waterbottles on the side of the highway of death.

No party, not even the conservatives, truly speaks to Albertans. We get hated on constantly by the rest of the country because we appear to be full of climate change deniers, but even the CEO of SUNCOR condemns deniers and politicians who cater to them. A lot of Albertans do acknowledge climate change is a reality despite how we’re painted, but because of the misunderstanding we feel directed at us constantly we tend to react badly and would rather hole up in our bunkers and let the rest of the country freeze in the dark - or melt in the sun as it were. No party speaks to working class rural people. No party makes the attempt to speak to people who are still only grappling with already outdated terminology like “global warming” while they are shoveling snow in August or September. No party is talking about actual grievances that working class people in Alberta face, such as long hours away from home and family or intense isolation that leads to addiction and death, that matter more to people than seemingly hypothetical change in climate that happens Elsewhere, not Here. Parties need to start coming up with concrete solutions that will make the inevitable transition more than just necessary but inclusive and beneficial. No one wants to feel like they have to start from scratch, no one wants to worry about what to do or how it will help. We aren’t used to thinking about solving problems, and we keep putting it on the next generation while we make it even harder for them.

The more we are criticized the more militaristic the vocabulary becomes, and that’s why we provincially voted for a war room and tax cuts while taking the money from school lunch programs. We rest on our laurels of having the lowest child poverty rate in the country while stealing money from children and blaming their parents for them going hungry. It’s abominable. And a lot of us realize it. And a lot of us still feel as if we have no choice. A lot of progressive voices get drowned out in stifling silence and any change feels like an existential threat. We got ourselves into this mess, but we all need to work together to get out of it. And that means listening to the strongest opposition we’ve had in nearly a half century. That means being grown ups and sitting at the table with the rest of the country. That means fighting the gut reaction to sputter out talking points you were taught to say because it meant protecting your family. That also means that we need to be listened to in return without smugness or patronizing attitudes from politicians or the rest of the country.

If you want us to switch to alternative energy, you all need to step up and start helping us do that. As long as we feel as if it’s being imposed on us we will struggle and we will fight, but it’s exactly why it’s so important to change the tone of the conversation. Listen to us. Help us. Make us feel like we’re part of the country. Give us the tools we need to be better. Encourage us to be leaders in the energy industry because we love being the best and thrive off healthy competition. Appeal to real, concrete issues for working class people with real concrete solutions.

yeah. uh. [places mic shakily back on the stand] peace im going to bed, fight me or whatever.

#yeah y yeah alberta #long gone saskatchewan #hapo replies #hapo reads canadian history #if you want citations i can and will dig them up so like don't test my patience #if i am misinformed i appreciate a gentle correction #but when i'm speaking of my own experience don't fuckin correct me #weh weh wehxit #neef-breeks #i reread this the next morning and im like wow i didnt touch on so much #but also if i add more i'll lose a thread of what i was saying because i go off on tangents #anyway i still stand by what i've written here even if i didnt embellish enough

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faemoria-arch · 6 years ago

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okay so a few days ago i received a mysterious anon asking ‘ how do i draw the characters ’ && given the context of what had been previously posted i assume this was asking for advice on how i draw tooth , jack , && pitch specifically . so this is . . . that . starting with toothiana . this isn’t like a step-by-step guide on how i draw her character so much a bunch of rambling of things i keep in mind for what i feel is right to communicate my portrayal of a character that was not fully designed by me . which means i don’t know if it would really help anybody else actually do anything , but maybe it’s interesting to consider when it comes to making choices for your own characters && stuff ? idk . w/e here we go .

okay so really basic fundamental strictly relevant to drawing her is that i treat her feathers like clothing which means i always draw her basic body shape first && then add them on . pushing gestures is extra important for characters who’s bodies are padded with other stuff because the clothing/feathers/fur/etc. will tame it down a lot , which can lead to them looking stiff if you don’t overcompensate to start with .

i hate that drawing WHAT A GOOD START . another small thing i try to keep in mind is that i actually draw her line of balance as though she is standing from her shoulders to her hips , && in most drawings only shift her legs to show that she is not , this is because at some point i realized that unless i’m trying to make her positioning seem awkward or draw attention to the fact that she is flying , it’s just really jarring to our eyes to see a humanoid exist upright in a position where they should not be able to balance . the movie does this too ( although it liked to position her more as though she’s sitting in the air really ) , which is why one of the more memorable shots in the movie is this :

because it’s really throwing in our face that tooth is not bound to the laws of gravity like we are && she is very accustomed to that . it’s impactful because she’s not constantly seen in poses like this . it is also not a coincidence that this is shown when she is reflecting on the supernatural reality of her work/life && playing the role of a mentor . my tooth in that scene would probably look more like this , because personality wise she’s obviously different in some ways . i studied && adapted a lot of the body language tooth displays in the movie for my portrayal ( why wouldn’t i , i still feel like it’s one of the most gorgeously animated movies in terms of its characters ever ) , but ofc it’s still not an exact match if i put my version in the same scenes .

movie tooth looks like she’s holding herself for comfort , almost like she’s cold . legs brought together , she’s trying to make herself smaller as a result of her uncertainty . my tooth is more aggressive in nature , so when she is anxious && talking about something that makes her uncomfortable she’s more likely to cross her arms over her chest which is still a subconsciously defensive gesture but a far more stand-offish . her legs are rarely poised in unison because she’s more than happy to take up more space . on the other hand :

my portrayal of tooth is also hyper-empathetic so talking to someone else about what’s hurting them ? she’ll subconsciously express her understanding of their hurt through something like placing a hand over her own heart . anyways my portrayal of tooth is still supposed to be petite but she’s also more curvy than the movie’s version in some areas ( something i decided to emphasize when i realized movie tooth is supposed to look like a young teen body-wise apparently ?? ) , so even though she usually ends up looking less bodacious in the end , this is pretty much her body shape if you took all those feathers off .

by default tooth is meant to be an exceptionally graceful looking character . i try to portray this in pretty much any situation of course , but one of my favorites is portraying it in the context of battle-readiness / battle-motions , because it gives a really stark && dramatic visual contrast to draw attention to it . a.k.a. her weapons .

i’m pushing curves as much as i can where i can . the motion through her body should seem as fluid && light as possible like she’s in the middle of a dance until it comes to the taut energy being held in her weapons . her blades are harsh angles in the midst of everything else - it’s something i over exaggerate all the time by making them literally nothing but straight lines . that is what spells out ‘ all her anger && tension is right here , in this sword . ’

( yeah don’t worry i’m gonna get to my thought process on drawing that asshole later ) it’s a useful norm on its own for another point of contrast to explore : when toothiana is in the mindset where her entire body is displayed as a weapon , more feral && wild . then it’s angles everywhere i can get away with it because the tension is everywhere , while still following the general ‘push && pull/squash && stretch’ rule of curves in drawing ofc .

in the movie tooth fights strictly with her wings ( && bunnymund’s boomarangs for a scene but she seems to use them like melee weapons ) so they do the same thing when she’s hostile at all . it’s just a visual storytelling shorthand for our society : whether its fangs , claws , bristling fur , a knife . sharp = dangerous . you want your character to look dangerous ? one way to do that is to make ‘em sharp !

lol butt . her crest of feathers on her head also flares out when she’s angry in the movie , which is something i used to have a good gif of their testing for but i can’t find it now . it’s another thing that gives the impression of being more sharp && jagged even just from a sheer consideration of silhouette , while also mixing in a more natural feel to the fact that she’s covered in feathers if she expresses herself through them .

last but not least , all that personal stylization really is in anything - drawing , writing , graphic design , whatever - is knowing the rules well enough to figure out how you can break them the way you like . i fudge things in how i draw toothiana all the time , but it’s always an intentional design choice , && i’m consistent about it , && that’s all it takes to make it go past the radar of suspended disbelief . for instance i never show toothiana’s ears with her feathers no matter how realistic it would be to see them . the golden ‘earring’ feathers are always covering them no matter what .

why ? because i tried to show her ears once && i didn’t like how it looked && that’s it that’s all the excuse you need . another thing i once realized was how difficult it was to position toothiana’s wings when she was sitting or laying down . so now when they’re at rest i act like they’re a cape && make them magically flexible . problem solved , thematic , && way more fun to draw .

&& that’s what matters in the end . your character should be fun to portray !

#» โลกีย์ ; Mem Draws #» โลกีย์ ; Out of Character #[ something that always happens to me when i watch through the ROTG movie as opposed to just #watching the clips without audio for reference purposes && stuff #is i am /never/ prepared for any of the voices #i think the voice acting is perfectly fine ofc ( 'cept i don't like isla as tooth because i'm bias but it's not like the delivery was bad )#but it's just never what i expect for ANY of them at all #&& watching the behind the scenes stuff where some of them are recording their lines is freaking surreal #oh right anyways uh #hope this is like #idk interesting to read at least i'll be making jack's next #&& then pitch #&& then i'll do like #a little combined thing for sandy north && bunnymund because i don't draw them enough to have that much established #but i can at least make note of what i think about when i /do/ draw them ]

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mabiviz-blog · 6 years ago

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DRRM Kwentuhan

As one of the prerequisites in our NSTP class, we were to visit our barangay hall to conduct an interview regarding the status of the community’s Disaster Risk Reduction and Management plans.

Community Background

I have lived in Bacoor for as far as I remember. More than half of my childhood was spent playing in the streets of Aniban II. Not only did I spend most of my time playing outside, but learning how to commute during junior high school only made it much more easier for me to explore and memorize the ins and outs of our community. Aniban II is a generally a peaceful community.

Community Situation

I was able to interview Mr. Christopher Rivera who is on his first term as a Sangguniang Barangay Member. With respect to his request, we did not take a picture together with him. Regardless, he was kind enough to indulge me in a “kwentuhan” session regarding the barangay’s risks and hazards.

Hazard Identification

Bacoor was a generally flood free city before the influx of people moving into the city in the late 1900s. The city used to be composed mainly of flat lands perfectly used for agriculture, with bodies of water like the Bacoor River and Zapote River proving to be crucial sources of water for irrigation.

picture taken at Prinza Dam

Now, the same bodies of water have also become one of the biggest hazards in the city. During rainy season, more commonly used bodies of waters like the Prinza Dam and Molino Dam overflew and caused flooding in some areas. Aside from this, the Zapote area is below sea level, making it prone to flooding during heavy rains. Typhoon Yolanda was one of the biggest storms to hit the Philippines to date. The typhoon did not only kill, but also destroyed thousands of homes. With the sheer size of the destruction caused by the calamity, Aniban 2 worked hand-in-hand with its surrounding barangays to help the community members to rise from the catastrophe.

Vulnerability, Elements, and People at Risk Assessment

picture taken at Aniban I, Bacoor

One of the most easily flooded places in Bacoor is Aniban 1, where a good 1-3 inches of flooding can easily accumulate as compared to other barangays like Aniban 2 and 4 who would not be experiencing any flooding at the same day. People living in the area have become accustomed to experiencing ankle-deep floods fluctuating throughout the months of July to December. There are also a some numbers of houses along Barangay Aniban II that are built on lower grounds, where residents often victims to minor flooding when there are continuous downpours of rain.

The Aniban Central School is one of the identifiable areas of barangay Aniban II vulnerable to flooding. Located right beside the barangay hall, it is observable how much lower the school grounds are compared to the main road right in front of it. This becomes one of the main reasons why students of said school are considered to be some of the people at risk during rainy season. Just this year, they finished constructing a four-storey building consisting of more than 10 rooms, which would also serve as a evacuation area during flooding.

During rainy seasons, water accumulates in the dark damp areas of the barangay. These places become possible breeding grounds for mosquitoes, which could lead to a dengue epidemic . Just recently, the officials visited the most common breeding areas for mosquitoes and were successful in their project of fumigating said areas. Residents also took part in the project by eliminating damp places around their homes where mosquitoes can lay their eggs.

Capacity and Disaster Management System

The barangay does not have specific operation plans but what they do have are basic equipment and manpower so they mostly rely on those two factors. They often plan the detailed execution of rescues and addressing calamities when the actual warning for said calamity comes, in order for them to be able to build a more specific action plan that would better address the certain situation they were to be faced with.

In preparation for calamities, they monitor the frequently flooded areas they divide into 2-3 groups who are each assigned an area to patrol. During patrol, they have with them their walky-talky and personal mobile phones to ensure that they stay within contact, most especially during times of emergencies. It is imperative that the barangay hall is stocked with the equipment needed for rescue missions, like first aid kits and security gear, especially during typhoon season.

Safest, Hazardous Places and Good Practices

One of the most hazardous places in the city was the Zapote River because bodies of water often pose the risk of overflowing, thus causing floods in the areas near it. This issue has been addressed through the construction of the Zapote River Drive. The construction project has not only addressed flooding issues in Zapote, but also in Las Piñas. Included in the project is a 300-meter wall with road, crossing Golden Acres & Moonwalk Phase 2, and Brgy. Talon 5, heading to Zapote River Drive. A 630-meter wall and road, built for retaining water, was also constructed It also includes a 630-meter retaining wall with road, including a bypassing the Zapote River, covering areas from Vatican Drive to Cicero Street at the BF Resort Village.

In the case of earthquakes, Aniban Central School and the Barangay Hall are the safest places in the barangay where residents can evacuate to. The school contains enough space to accommodate at least a few hundred people during evacuation. There are not many places in the barangay with open spaces clear of any hazardous buildings or objects for earthquakes because it mostly consists of residential houses and commercial establishments constructed relatively close to each other.

The barangay officials are generally aware of the ongoing issues in the community, which is why they recently conducted a project to fumigate the barangay to prevent a dengue epidemic. As I’ve previously mentioned, not only did they fumigate common areas susceptible to mosquito infestation, but they also encouraged the residents to partake in the project by eliminating possible breeding grounds on their own homes.

Issues of The Community

Aniban II, Bacoor can be observed as a generally resilient community. They have enough history that proves that their resources and manpower can ensure that the members are able to bounce back from the damage that some calamities bring to them. A major move towards eradicating community issues is to improve the barangay waste management and drainage system to lessen the chances of flooding. With the heavy influx of people passing through the community in daytime, it is quite difficult to maintain cleanliness for some parts of the barangay.

Correlation to the Disaster Situation of the Philippines

The Philippines, being a tropical country surrounded by multiple bodies of water, is vulnerable to storm surges and typhoons. Having said this, we must address the inefficient sewage and waste management systems existing in numerous cities all around the country. Such problems continue to make our cities more susceptible to flash floods with all the canals blocked up by our own garbage.

This problem cannot be solved single handedly. All barangays/communities from Bacoor must collaborate to come up with newer and more efficient ways of improving the city. Us, members of the community, must also join the initiative by observing discipline in waste management.

Realization

Despite having lived in this community for more than half of my life, I have come to know that there were still a lot of things I was not aware of regarding my surroundings. With this activity, I got to know more about the place I grew up in and the people within it-- the ins and outs of how the community functions together. It would be difficult for communities to live and thrive without collaboration because each barangay is interconnected with the other. I hope that this activity enlightens others as it has done to me. It is time that we all help improve our communities by taking on more active roles as Filipino citizens and living more sustainable lives.

Why and How should we address the issues of disasters in the Philippines?

As Filipino citizens, these disasters do not only destroy infrastructures, but also the lives and livelihoods of the people. It would not be possible for the government to address and solve this issue with unwilling and uncooperative citizens. We must all take part in becoming the solution to these disasters. We can always start becoming more conscious of our actions and how they affect the people and places surrounding us. It is evident that a lot of us lack discipline and responsibility in terms of waste management and self-awareness.

Philippines has bounced back from so many calamities already. It is good that our country is a resilient one, but would it not be much better if it were to become a prepared one? We would not need to use up tons of our resources having to repair properties destroyed by disasters if we built disaster-ready establishments. We would save so much more resources if so and tons of lives would not have to be deeply affected by disasters in our country.

What actions should I take to increase the capacities of my own community?

As I am no longer a minor and already capable of participating in voting, I could start with voting for community leaders who prove to be promising, responsible, and self-aware leaders and members of the community, as well. One of the things that I already do to help my community is trying to live a sustainable life by minimizing my consumption of plastic and other harmful products to our community’s environment. Aside from this, I can also take part in community projects like, barangay cleanups and tree planting events. As a student, I must also take part in school initiatives and seminars that would benefit my community, like taking NSTP courses to improve and broaden my knowledge on how to help my community. We, as citizens of our country, must be more self-aware of our actions as they affect not only us but our environment, which is why we must all do our best to improve ourselves and become more proactive in our own communities.

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wonderfulworldofmichaelford · 7 years ago

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Episodyssey - “Operation: C.A.R.A.M.E.L.”

Welcome to Episodyssey, my new review thing specifically for episodes of TV shows, where I talk about the best, the worst, and the weirdest episodes I can think of. I figured I’d start things off with the very episode that inspired me to make this series: Operation: C.A.R.A.M.E.L.

I think it’s safe to say that Codename: Kids Next Door is one of Cartoon Network’s best and most creative shows ever. It had a fun concept, loads of creative gadgets, a colorful rogues gallery of memorable and amusing villains, and a core cast of likable childish rogues. Throw in an incredibly intriguing lore, lots of great humor, and a willingness to reference everything from Star Wars to The Animatrix of all things, and you have a classic on your hands.

[These kids are alright]

Speaking of references, the episode I’m here to talk about contains a reference… to Fullmetal Alchemist. I mean really, what else could a massive transmutation circle be referencing? And not only that, the episode was concluding one of the best story arcs the show had done, one that had spanned many episodes and given one of the best characters a true rival while also referencing one of the best franchises known to man. All of the elements are here for a great episode, one that should be one of my favorites.

Too bad they fucked it all up.

[Galactic KND Numbuh One is very disappointed]

So to explain why this episode is a disaster, let’s rewind a bit and talk about the setup. Back in season three in the episode Operation: J.E.W.E.L.S. we were introduced to a new antagonist: Heinrich Von Marzipan. Imagine if Augustus Gloop was every single Nazi from the Indiana Jones movies at once, and there you have him.

[I bet you thought I was kidding]

This rotund German chocoholic came into conflict with Numbuh 5, who for those not in the know is a kid who could only exist in fiction due to being unbearably cool in everything she did. Throughout his appearances, he would show up, antagonize Numbuh 5, probably reference some old movie, and then fuck off again. In his second appearance he was turned into a living being made of chocolate in a Temple of Doom reference gone amok, and in his third appearance he was sent to the arctic prison base. After one more appearance came this, his fifth and final appearance.

This episode explained an incident that had been hinted at way back when he first appeared: the Guatemala incident, which is what soured his relationship with Numbuh 5 in the first place. Here it is explained that back then, he performed a ritual to create a sacred caramel that was made from the most prized quality of the human a ritual was performed on, which would create five pieces of caramel with flavor depending on the quality taken. Heinrich of course did this to himself and then devoured all the candies on his own, being the greedy bastard he is. This of course led to the side effect of his prized quality being lost forever, and he blamed Numbuh 5 for leaving him behind when she realized his greed would be his undoing.

His plan here is to use the ritual to steal the qualities from a large number of KND operatives, including Numbuh 5, and eat all their candies. With a massive transmutation circle and unfathomable gluttony, Heinrich gets ready to do the deed… until Numbuh 5 reveals she had his last candy all a long and gives it to him, allowing him to break the curse on himself. You see, all he needed to do was to share candy, and all of his problems would have been solved!

Or, well… I should say, all of HER problems.

You see, in a shocking swerve, it is revealed that Heinrich gave up his beauty. He was originally a pretty girl.

[No caption could possibly capture the sheer level of bafflement this exudes]

So this ending just… fucking comes out of nowhere. None of this was ever even remotely hinted at before, and this is a series that has some pretty solid continuity. It feels really awkward and confusing to have such a huge twist like this just be completely unforeshadowed, not to mention the fact that it was never even brought up, and there is no reason Numbuh 5 should have kept this a secret other than to shock the audience with the big twist.

It also opens up a world of kinda fucked up implications, namely that ugliness means being a fat boy. Like this is literally the conditions of the equivalent exchange here, you lose your most important trait, and it is explicitly stated Henrietta’s trait was her beauty... So losing her beauty turns he from a skinny blonde girl into the average political blogger on Tumblr: a fat, angry Nazi. I’m not sure what this says about our portly hero Numbuh 2, or his equally heoic yet somewhat obnoxious brother Tommy, or any of the other chubby characters in the show who are equally if not moreso fat than Heinrich. It just feels really weird for the show to equate being fat and a boy with being ugly, especially when not only are there at least two chubby heroic characters (the aforementioned Gilligan brothers), but the show’s art style doesn’t really make Heinrich look all that ugly. Like yeah he’s clearly a fat greedy bastard and his personality is foul, but he’s no Bling Bling Boy or anything.

[Just kidding, Heinrich wishes he exuded the raw sex appeal of BBB]

It just feels really weird and awkward, especially since the show has plenty of ways of making characters ugly - they even have it happen to a few characters here in the episode, WITHOUT changing their gender! This feels like it was only done for shock value; it really adds nothing and frankly just feels like a colossal letdown in terms of this plotline. I’m not going to pretend like this was probably going to rival the greatest episodes with its conclusion, but I think something a little more sensible than “Heinrich was a girl the WHOLE TIME! Also boys are fat and ugly lol” would have made for a more compelling ending to this mini-arc. At the very least, it would have given a far more satisfying conclusion to the rivalry between Heinrich and Numbuh 5. Instead, all we’re left with is a mediocre wrap-up, a waste of a great reference, and eight pornographic pictures on Paheal.

[For once I’m glad the internet didn’t remember to Rule 34 something]

#Episodyssey #Review #Cartoon review #episode review #Codename: Kids Next Door #KND #Operation: C.A.R.A.M.E.L.#weird #wtf #Cartoon Network

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tonystarktogo · 8 years ago

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Tiny Tony Overlord Part 5

Part I | Part II | Part III | Part IV | Read on AO3

Betaed by the amazing @folklejend. All remaining mistakes are my own.

Summary: In which Bix isn't as indifferent as she'd like to be, a lot of people die put nobody really cares, a miraculous recovery doesn't actually solve all of Tony's problems and, as always, life isn't fair.

Yay, an update on time! :) Please enjoy!

.Still The Parking Lot of Zach’s B&B.

Bix doesn’t hate a lot of things. Disliking, sure. A ton of things even, Tony Stark currently being on top of that list. But hate? Hate requires effort, hate requires emotional investment, and Bix happens to be short on both.

What Bix definitely and without question hates, though, are the kid’s eyes.

Sure, rationally Bix knows the kid is Tony Stark. The ‘how’ and ‘why’ are two big, blank spots, but watching a forty-four-year-old man being turned into a kid that doesn’t look a day over nine is a pretty eye-opening experience. It also isn’t relevant to the mission. A dead Stark is a dead Stark after all, no matter at what age.

The problem is, he doesn’t look like a Stark. He looks like a child. A child with big brown eyes staring up at Bix and-

Fuck.

Why is it always brown eyes? Why can’t they be green or blue? And why does this stupid detail make Bix hesitate at all?

[continues under the cut]

Stark is still standing there, looking tiny in front of Bix and the other men. He is clutching a half-empty water bottle like it’s a teddy bear and that shouldn’t have any effect on Bix at all. Just because Stark makes for a damn cute kid and his stubborn pout may or may not raise all sorts of protective instincts Bix didn’t even know existed until now doesn’t have to mean anything.

Bix has been serving Hydra for years , has lied and betrayed and murdered for an organisation that doesn’t give a fuck about them. And Bix isn’t doing it because of some twisted conviction to save the world. All that drivel about humanity being unable to handle freedom and how the world has to be ruled to achieve its true potential is absolute bullshit. An excuse for a couple of power-hungry maniacs to justify their genocide, nothing more.

And right now Bix is supposed to murder another kid for their little chess game. A brown-eyed kid.

It is an over-eager underling who decides to take things into his own hands. Far too impatient, he won’t last long in the field.

Unfortunately, Bix doesn’t even get to punish the wayward minion, which is honest to god the best part of being team leader, because in that moment, mini-Stark activates the Asset. The one thing everyone had been so sure he wouldn’t be capable of, wouldn’t figure out how to do in time.

They should have accounted for Stark’s completely unrealistic luck in their plans, damn it.

Not that it matters anymore. The Soldier has been activated. Stark’s command doesn’t leave much wiggle room either. Twelve of SHIELD’s standard combatants against the Winter Soldier? Bix doesn’t need a fortune teller to know how this fight is going to end.

Bix doesn’t bother to share that revelation with the other agents. It would be a waste of time. Besides, it’s not like Hydra choses its recruits based on their well-developed sense of loyalty. Instead, Bix does the only sensible thing when faced with a brutal killing machine that has been turned loose: Bix jumps over Stark’s crumbled body and runs.

* * * * *

Waking up in a place you don’t remember falling asleep in is an incredibly disconcerting experience. Waking up in a pool of blood, on the other hand, is almost comforting in its familiarity.

Slowly, Tony lifts his head. The motion is less painful than anticipated, considering the amount of blood his body is covered in. Curling his toes and clenching his hands confirms that his extremities are in working order as well, and besides the persistent ache in his left upper arm and the cuts on his hands, he seems to be uninjured.

Tony should probably freak out about the blood on him—he looks like he’s come fresh off the set of a really bad horror flick—but frankly, he’s woken up in worse. Actually, he feels pretty good about himself right now. His pulsing headache has completely disappeared and though no more than thirty minutes could have passed, Tony feels well-rested and energised.

It’s true, he supposes; the mental state does influence one’s physical condition. Because for the first time since he’s woken up in that café, his mind is clear.

Hell, he’s been so gone, he hasn’t even realised how off he has been these past few hours. How foggy and sluggish his mind worked, how many holes there were in his memory that he had lacked the capacity to even notice. He had been running on barely-there instincts and nothing else. It was sheer dumb luck Dead-Eyes hadn’t killed him on the spot.

And then the confrontation in the parking lot. Tony hasn’t walked into an ambush like that in years. It is a good thing Vic had been unable to accompany him; she would have murdered him for his lack of caution.

In his defence, Tony had underestimated how fractured, for lack of a better word, the transfer would be. He had been warned, multiple times, about the dangers of messing with the time storage, but those warnings had always focused on the risks of knowing too much. The unpredictable ways the future would be changed by that knowledge alone. The very real possibility of being driven into insanity by a reality that would no longer be real.

In a way, Tony understands those concerns better now. After the constant pain of the last few hours, the sensation of being mentally ripped apart, of being overwhelmed by a life that is not quite his own, the terror of drowning in a future that can never be allowed to come to pass yet has, he gets how tempting an escape from the horror of it all can be.

At the same time though, there is this nagging voice in the back of his mind, the disbelieving “Is that really all you’ve got?“ he can’t fully silence. Because the truth is, compared to the last couple of years, this pain, this terror, is nothing.

Tony winces, instinctively shying away from the darkest of his new memories. The deaths, the hopelessness, the torture, the fight they continued because there was nothing else left to do anymore. The hollow victory when they had finally, finally discovered a cure—too late to make a difference, too late to save anyone. An endless line of faces, young and old. People they lost, people who sacrificed themselves, people who betrayed them in the end.

And now here he is. In 2014, where none of it has happened yet, back in a time where he can still make a difference, and yet Tony doesn’t feel relieved or accomplished—he feels cheated.

Can it really be this simple? Is one highly unstable formula and a reckless veteran of the Last War all it takes to save the world? Granted, he is in the body of his ten-year-old self, which is odd. Definitely not one of the side-effects Tony can remember. But his age is only a minor setback. If what the world needed was a warrior it wouldn’t have been him whom they would have sent. He should still be able to create the cure once he has procured the necessary equipment; he can worry about the distribution after that.

Except. Tony furrows his brows in concentration, does his best to draw up every single memory he has pertaining the invasion, the war councils, the endless hours spent in labs and workshops. He recalls his arguments with Rogers early on, Pepper sobbing into his shoulder at Happy’s funeral, the March of the Dead Children, the mistakes they made in the beginning and then never again. It’s all there, burned into his mind, with a clarity that he knows will give him nightmares for years to come.

The only thing Tony can’t seem to recall is the enemy. Who they were fighting. What they were fighting. He knows there was something; he knows it destroyed them and he knows they found a cure. Tony balls his bloodied hands into fists, and for the first time, there is something like panic uncurling in his chest.

No. This has to be some sort of sick cosmic joke. It’s just not possible. He can’t have forgotten the cure. He can’t have forgotten the threat. The memories have to be there somewhere, buried perhaps, but they have to exist. They have to.

Tony swallows, almost chokes on the bile rising in his throat. He can’t watch his world be torn apart again, knowing something is coming yet unable to do anything until the threat reveals itself. It will be too late by then, he already knows that. Already lived through it once. And if there is one thing he knows for certain, it’s that he can’t live through it again.

Please don’t make me live through it again.

Tony doesn’t even realise how fast he’s spiralling until the heavy sound of approaching footsteps awakens his deeply-ingrained survival instincts. He is on his feet before he recognises Dead-Eyes, who appears to be carrying two bodies. Two very, very dead bodies. The horrifying sight actually helps grounding Tony once more. It reminds him that he is currently standing on a battlefield, and that, at least, is something he knows so well it’s become routine at this point.

There are seven bodies that he can see—which is not saying much if one takes his current size into account—all of them dressed and armed for battle. Dropping to his knees next to the closest one, Tony turns the male onto his back and looks him over. Early thirties, no memorable features, one bullet wound to the head, two more in his chest. He’s not carrying anything worthwhile except for a small knife that Tony pockets and a badge identifying him as Agent Trent Michaels.

“He’s SHIELD,” Tony muses out loud and crawls towards the next body, where he finds a similar badge.

For a long moment he stares at the IDs in silent contemplation. Then he lifts his head and meets Dead-Eyes’ expectant glance. “Get me the others as well.”

In total, there are eleven bodies, all of them official SHIELD agents. Tony would need access to a database to make sure they’re valid but there is no reason to assume they aren’t. Which leaves two very important questions. One: Why on earth does SHIELD want him dead? Nothing in Tony’s memories hints at a similar occurrence in his past—future—other life. Sure, he isn’t particular chummy with the spy agency, but a death sentence seems a bit much, even by Fury’s standards. Two: How likely is it that they are gonna ask questions first and shoot later once they find their decimated agents? And that’s a rhetorical question.

Seems like Tony’s original plan—get to his old team mates, prove his identity, get into the best lab there is and fix this mess—isn’t so feasible anymore.

Staring down at the motionless bodies of the SHIELD agents, Tony knows with absolute certainty that he can’t contact the organisation, no matter how useful their resources might prove to be. Not without taking unpredictable risks and definitely not without letting Dead-Eyes take the fall for this bloodbath. It would be possible, Tony is sure he could work it out somehow, but he finds himself surprisingly averse to the idea.

By all means, it should be an easy choice. Knowing that his old friends, his self-made family are waiting for him in a home he’d built for them all, alive and well. The idea of getting that back, no matter the dangers, no matter what body he is in, is incredibly tempting. It’s a dream he has held onto for years, finally within his reach, and yet. His eyes find Dead-Eyes’ motionless shadow at his back for a moment and Tony feels his throat closing up and traitorous tears burning behind closed lids because it has never been a choice at all.

For the first time since waking up in a world two heads smaller than every enemy trying to kill him, Tony actually feels ten years old. Because right now he doesn’t want to save the world, doesn’t want to cry himself to sleep over a stupid cure he can’t seem to remember. He wants Jarvis. He wants his parents. He wants to hide under his bed forever.

He can’t go back to being that scared, ten year old ever again and it’s not fair.

Then Tony’s spine stiffens and narrow shoulders straighten with steely determination. “Soldier,” he calls out, the designation falling naturally from his lips. Watches as Dead-Eyes snaps to attention, dark, ever so intelligent eyes focusing on him. It helps, being the centre of someone’s focus. Grounds him in a way Tony had forgotten he could be anchored. “Destroy any evidence of our presence and let’s get out of here. We’re going dark.”

Because above all else, Tony Stark, at any age and in any form, is a futurist.

Tony doesn’t go back. He moves forward.

A little shorter than usual but I promise the next chapter will make up for that. Also, we've officially reached the end of the "introduction" period. All the pieces have been placed on the board. Now it's time to get this game started...

Please let me know what you think, and if you have any theories about where this story goes now I'd love to hear them! Have a relaxing Sunday everybody!

#ReRe writes #Tiny Tony Overlord #Tony Stark #Bucky Barnes #Bix The HYDRA Goon #tiny Tony #deaged Tony #fic #Winter Soldier Bucky #SHIELD is a mess #so is Tony #and so it begins...

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coolgreatwebsite · 8 years ago

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Cool Games I Finished In 2017 (In No Real Order)

Civilization The year is nearing its end, so that means it’s once again time for one of these. 2017 has been rough for pretty much everyone, but even divorced from the state of the world this was unquestionably the worst year of my life. 2017 was a goddamn nightmare where nearly everything went wrong for me in the most major way possible. Consequently I didn’t get to do as much writing as I would have liked, and I ended up playing fewer games with almost all of them being 2017 releases. But! The video games were very fun!! So it all cancels out!!! Everything’s okay!!!! Here’s a bunch of cool games I experienced for the first time in 2017.

Dandy Dungeon: Legend of Brave Yamada (iOS, 2017)

Dandy Dungeon is weird as hell, which makes sense given that it was made by a lot of people who originally worked on games like Chulip and Freshly-Picked Tingle’s Rosy Rupeeland. It’s a free-to-play phone game that’s sort of a cross between a puzzle game and a dungeon crawler. Guide your semi-nude hero Yamada to the exit of the 5x5 dungeon grid in a single line, trying to touch every tile along the way, gathering treasure and beating up enemies to level up. Solving the floors and making the perfect line is satisfying, the story and enemies are all very strange, and there's a ton of content. The free-to-play monetization isn’t too obtrusive either, you can either buy straight up convenience features like unlimited energy and a mid-dungeon item storage system or buy rice balls that can be used as gacha entries or continues if you die in a dungeon and don’t want to give up your treasure. I felt 100% okay with giving the weirdos who made this game money. The same people put out another game this year, Million Onion Hotel, and I barely put any time into it because I just kept playing Dandy Dungeon. I’m very much looking forward to really playing that whenever the hell I finally burn out on this.

Yakuza 0 (PlayStation 4, 2017)

Yakuza 0 is a hell of a game, and a hell of an introduction to the Yakuza series for anyone who hasn’t played it. Set in 1988, the game follows series mainstays Kiryu and Majima as they deal with the events that made them who they are in the games to follow. While I ended up still liking Yakuza 5 more if only for the sheer scope and variety of it, Yakuza 0 is very easily the second best game in the series. It has one of the most straightforward, coherent and engaging narratives out of all of them, it pulls off its setting so well that it made me sort of nostalgic for an era I wasn’t even alive for, and the localization/writing is unquestionably the best the series has had. Almost every single sidequest is funny or memorable in some way and I just can’t say that about the rest of the games. It’s not flawless. The combat unsurprisingly pulls very heavily from Yakuza 5 but with multiple fighting styles for Kiryu and Majima taking the place of multiple characters, and I mostly found myself just sticking with one style for each of them. Beast and Breaker were just too good. The story, while mostly good as previously stated, does have its stumbling points. Some characters and events definitely aren’t given enough breathing room, mostly on the Majima side of things, and weirdly enough the game holds back on having Kiryu and Majima interact for the most part. Overall though, Yakuza 0 is a fantastic encapsulation of why I love this series so damn much and the absolute best jumping on point a newcomer could ask for. Plus Space Harrier is in it! Every game is better when you can also play Space Harrier.

NieR: Automata (PlayStation 4, 2017)

I feel like every year I do one of these lists there’s a game where I start off by saying “This game is good, but”. NieR: Automata is this year’s game. NieR: Automata is a good game, but I did not have the fervent, visceral reaction to it that most other people seem to have had, and my feelings are muddied even further by the lingering feeling that I SHOULD have. I love the first NieR. It’s one of my favorite games of all time. I love PlatinumGames. They’re one of my favorite developers of all time. Yet I came away from Automata somewhat... I don’t know if it’s disappointed. I guess “left wanting” might be a more accurate description? Again, don’t get me wrong here, this is a good game. There’s a lot to like in NieR: Automata. It’s a wild ride, but for me that’s... kind of it? The game shuttles you from crazy setpiece to crazy setpiece, but the second I stopped to think about anything that happened in any sort of detail it all just got real murky. I didn’t feel connected to any of the characters, outside two exceptions, and one of those is a character from the first game that I already loved. NieR: Automata’s storytelling is much more reliant and focused on its themes and imagery than anything that really actually happens during the course of the story, and I’ve never been a huge fan of narratives like that. I need a strong connection to characters and events and places, and whereas the first NieR had that by the truckload, Automata super doesn’t. There’s also the part where a lot of what Automata does, I feel the original game did better. Automata’s music is good, but NieR’s is better. The multiple playthrough system feels like it’s just tacked on because the first game did it, where in the original it was absolutely vital to that game’s story. Same goes for the choice you make in the final ending. The most I can say as far as improvements go is that the combat, while about as mindless, certainly looks better and overall the sidequests are less tedious and grindy. It’s been a very weird experience seeing the huge, widespread positive reaction to this game essentially mirror my feelings on the first game while I’m just sort of left to grumble about how the first game did all that better under my breath. Not that I’m not glad it got a positive reception! It’s great that this game has been such a success and that so many people have finally had their Yoko Taro Moment™. Like I’ve gone out of my way to state multiple times: the game is still good. There’s some wild shit to see in NieR: Automata, and while it didn’t leave a positive lasting impression on me, I very much had a good time with it in the moment.

The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild (Nintendo Switch, 2017)

I thought I was done with open world games. I had pretty much decided I was two years ago. I was so tired of the checklists, the boring traversal, the endless swaths of fucking nothing between mission A and mission B, the heaps of useless collectible garbage littering the ground trying to trick you into thinking you’re doing something. I was perfectly content with never playing an open world game again, and when Nintendo started promoting the new Zelda with that familiar Bethesda-esque “go any direction, climb any mountain” rhetoric and showed you climbing towers to reveal the map, I for all intents and purposes checked the fuck out. I didn’t care that it was Zelda, I didn’t care that it was Nintendo, I was just fucking done with all of that... I thought. The more time went on, the more impressions got out, and the more impressions got out, the more of my individual sticking points seemed to have been addressed. Yeah, you climb towers, but all that does is fill in the topography of the map. You don’t get flooded with a million activity and collectible icons, it’s up to you to scope out what looks interesting. And most importantly, while the landmass is large, there’s always something around the corner. I decided to get Breath of the Wild along with my Switch and I’m so glad I did. If I hadn’t been whittled down by pre-release chatter I would have missed out on one of the best games I’ve ever played. It’s like Nintendo explicitly set out to fix every problem I had with open world games. The way the systems in the world interact with each other, how much of a joy it is to explore and traverse the terrain, and the fact that there really IS always something to find make for a breathtaking game. If you go in any direction, you’ll trip over dozens of neat things to do and see. If you climb any mountain, there’s a good chance there will be something waiting for you at the top (and along the way), from a simple Korok seed puzzle to a full-blown shrine dungeon. The game gives you no truly firm direction once you leave the tutorial area, so it really is up to you to explore and find what you want. You can even run straight for the final boss if you want! The traditional Zelda-style puzzles are all super smart and satisfying to solve. I even liked the Divine Beast dungeons and boss fights, which I feel like I’m in the minority about. I finally took on Ganon after about 100 hours of playing the game and I hadn’t been so sad that a game was over since I beat Persona 3. Breath of the Wild is just an incredible, once in a lifetime game. I can’t wait to do it all again next year when I do another playthrough with all the DLC.

Persona 5 (PlayStation 4, 2017)

Persona 3 will likely always be nearest and dearest to my heart, but Persona 5 is objectively the best Persona game. They’ve polished the Persona formula to such a perfect mirror sheen in this one and I’ve never seen a game so consistently and effortlessly ooze such a concentrated amount of liquid capital-“S” Style before. The plot doesn’t intimately revolve around the cast to the degree Persona 4′s does, but they’ve made another charming band of anime teens nonetheless. They’ve either restored or re-worked nearly every mechanical aspect that was dropped between Persona 3 and 4. The soundtrack is incredible, there’s actually a decent amount of non-party S-Links again, the end of the game sticks the landing in a way Persona 4 very much does not... I could keep going. Persona 5 just plain rules. It’s the only game in the series where (even though I haven’t yet) I’ve actually wanted to jump in and do a New Game+ run.

Wonder Boy: The Dragon’s Trap (Nintendo Switch, 2017)

As I may have mentioned in a certain other article from this year, I have had very little love for Wonder Boy over the years. That changed a bit when I decided to try out Monster World IV a few years ago, and I think I’m officially a Wonder Boy Liker after playing The Dragon’s Trap. A remake of Wonder Boy 3 for the Master System, Dragon’s Trap is essentially just an extremely pretty coat of paint on a very early Metroidvania sort of game, but it’s remarkable how well the core gameplay holds up. You start as a human and very early on you’re transformed into a dragon, and you explore the world until you reach a boss which, upon being defeated, transforms you into a mouse. Your mouse form has the ability to enter narrow spaces and stick to certain walls, which allows you to reach new areas, bosses and transformations. Defeated enemies drop coins that you can use to purchase new weapons and armor from shops hidden across the world. It’s fairly simple, but I think that’s the reason it’s still so enjoyable today. The controls are tight and responsive and it doesn’t really date itself in too many ways. They went to great lengths to recreate the original game, down to being able to swap between the remade and classic graphics and music with a button press. Old passwords from the original game even work in the remake. The new art and music are beautiful and the game is the perfect length to not overstay its welcome. You can tell the people who made this really love the original game, and they absolutely did right by it.

Resident Evil 7: Biohazard (PlayStation 4, 2017)

I never in a million years expected to like Resident Evil 7 as much as I did. I played the demo back when it came out and thought it was okay, and I mainly got the full game so I could play something on my PSVR. It’s kind of crazy how, after so many years of Resident Evil stumbling, Capcom managed to just get everything back on track just like that. They made Resident Evil tense and scary again. The VR is insanely effective but even playing through on a regular ol’ TV, which I did multiple times after my initial VR playthrough, they manage to capture a really good, persistent sense of dread. For most of the game, anyway. The last third definitely slips a bit too far back into action game territory, and while it’s still enjoyable it’s definitely weaker than what came before. I beat this for the first time right before the next game on the list came out, and even while super deep into that I couldn’t stop thinking about Resident Evil 7. I really need to go back and play all the DLC.

Super Mario Odyssey (Nintendo Switch, 2017)

2017 was Nintendo’s year. They released my favorite console in a good long while with the Switch, launched it with one of the greatest games of all time, and closed out the year with another incredible game in Super Mario Odyssey. Mario Odyssey has finally dethroned Mario 64 as my favorite 3D exploration Mario game. It’s like Breath of the Wild in that there’s something to find in every nook and cranny, but condensed down into multiple, more tightly designed areas. It’s an absolute joy to play. I 100%ed the game and not once in the 50-ish hours that took did I get tired of controlling Mario. The movement options all flow together so naturally and complement the spaces you explore so well. Landing a long jump > hat throw > dive > hat bounce > dive combo across a huge gap was the most satisfying thing in the world to pull off even as I grabbed the very last power moon. The variety of the worlds and challenges and things to capture kept me in a constant state of excitement about what was coming up next, and the game is consistently charming in both weird new ways and a couple of very effective nostalgic ones. My only real complaints are that I think it’s maybe the easiest Mario game ever made, and I wish more of the platforming challenges were baked into the worlds proper instead of cordoned off into their own little challenge rooms, but basically everything else about the game manages to make those minor somehow. Mario Odyssey is distilled happiness in video game form, and the world needs more of that.

Sonic Mania (PlayStation 4, 2017)

Ohhhh myyyyy Goddddddddddddd Sonic Mania. I cannot fucking believe how awesome Sonic Mania is. I love the Genesis Sonic games so fucking much and while I like Sonic Adventure 1 despite itself, there hasn’t been a good Sonic game since Sonic 3 & Knuckles. The Genesis games always were and will always be great fucking video games, despite what internet fuckboys say because Sonic’s an easy target to dunk on. I’ll take Sonic 3 & Knuckles over Super Mario World any day of the fucking week. Fight me. I’ll cut you. With Sonic Mania, there is FINALLY, fucking TWENTY-THREE GODDAMN YEARS LATER, a legitimately great Sonic The Hedgehog game again, and I’m stunned. I was INSANELY skeptical about this game from the minute it was announced until basically the moment I played it. Yeah, they brought in people from the hacking and fan-game community to work on this one instead of letting Sonic Team touch it, but I’m close enough to those communities to know that that on its own is NOT enough to guarantee the game would be good. Yeah, Taxman and Stealth made an extremely good replica of the Sonic 1-3&K engine, but they absolutely did not have the design chops to tackle anything but ports successfully. That new version of Hidden Palace they added into the iOS port of Sonic 2 was a complete trash fire. Thankfully they linked up with PagodaWest Games, a company made up of a lot of the non-insane elements behind the old Sonic 2 HD project, who as it turns out very much did have the design chops. Together they made something incredible. It obviously controls perfectly given the engine, but the levels are so fun and well-crafted. The classic levels manage to mix in so many different elements from other levels that didn’t quite make it in the game on top of there being weird twists on those on TOP of all the completely new elements, and the brand new levels are lavish with all sorts of super fun new gimmicks and details. The game looks fucking gorgeous, going for a sort of “what if they had made a 2D Sonic for the Saturn” look that it pulls off great, even going so far as to render the special stages in low-poly 3D. The music is P-H-E-N-O-M-E-N-A-L, sounding like a lost ‘90s Japanese arrange CD but without all the bad aspects that usually come with those. There’s so many dumb, great little details for hardcore classic Sonic and Sega fans littered throughout the game. They managed to fucking combine Oil Ocean and Sandopolis, my least favorite zone from Sonic 2 and one of the worst zones in the entire SERIES, and have me come away from it not hating it. It’s masterful. It’s beautiful. It’s right up there with Sonic 3 & Knuckles for best in the series. Nothing this year made me so genuinely, personally delighted. Sonic Mania was made just for me and I love it and I want another one with all original levels as soon as possible. Please let these people make video games for me forever.

Xenoblade Chronicles 2 (Nintendo Switch, 2017)

The original Xenoblade is one of my favorite RPGs of the last generation. Then they released Xenoblade Chronicles X for the Wii U and broke my goddamn heart. They tossed out nearly everything I loved about the first game in favor of haphazardly dumping as many disjointed game mechanics as they could on top of bland open world exploration and needlessly grindy progression. It was such a hard swerve that by the time they had gotten around to announcing a proper Xenoblade 2 for the Switch I had basically abandoned all hope of it being a game I’d like. But for some reason, I still decided to give Monolithsoft one last shot. And I’m glad I did! While not quite as cohesive and instantly-endearing as the original, they definitely righted the ship. There’s a bunch of weird mechanics, but in the good Xenoblade 1 way where they mete them all out at an appropriate pace and explain them and they all fit together. The cast of characters is likable, the music is great, the gameplay is engaging all the way through. They managed to pull it off, and I’m back on board for a potential Xenoblade 3.

These games were also cool, I just had less words to say about them: Splatoon 2 (Nintendo Switch, 2017): Splatoon is great. Splatoon 2 is more of that. The new weapons are fun, the new maps are cool, Salmon Run is the most fun I’ve ever had with a horde mode. I played it for like 100 hours already. Not too much else to say! Play Splatoon 2! Hitman (PlayStation 4, 2016): Hitman is an amazing sandbox. Whether I was following along with the authored ways to kill my targets, doing things my own way or trying to get out of a situation that went completely south, Hitman constantly surprised me with the variety of things I could do and options I could take advantage of. And there’s so damn much content to do it all in. DDRMAX, DDRMAX2 & Dance Dance Revolution Extreme (PlayStation 2, 2002, 2003 & 2004): This doesn’t really teeeechnically fit on this list but I would be remiss not to bring up my rekindled love affair with DDR this year. My very good friend who I am very appreciative towards at all times Geoff generously gifted me an old Cobalt Flux dance pad back in like June and I have been playing DDR again ever since and it’s still great. I can clear some songs on heavy now. Thanks Geoff. Glittermitten Grove (Steam, 2016): A very normal game about fairies, and not about shaving. Tekken 7 (PlayStation 4, 2017): Tekken 7 is the first Tekken game I’ve cared about in like a decade. I couldn’t really tell you exactly why, to be honest, but the fact of the matter is that Tekken 7 is very fun to play and I highly recommend it. Wolfenstein II: The New Colossus (PlayStation 4, 2017): I think the gameplay of this is worse than the first game, but everything else is stronger. Hopefully they fix it up and make a game that’s great all around next time. Gundam Versus (PlayStation 4, 2017): Gundam Versus is basically a team based Virtual On. I had a lot of fun with an old version of the game at various events I went to throughout the year and I had a lot of fun with this one even though I didn’t play it nearly as much as I wanted to. Clowning on people with Guntank in 1v1 is probably the hardest I laughed all year.

And that’s it! That’s 2017! It’s done! Good riddance! Thank you all again for bothering to read my video game words. If you need me, I’ll be training to deliver many extremely savage elbow drops to 2018 until it gives me what I want.

#article #year wrapup

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princesssarcastia · 5 years ago

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learning to live with it

hello, I’m back for the third night in a row with more weird ass star wars fic from this one universe i’m slowly expanding.

in which obi-wan is straight-up not having a good time, and all his friends aren’t dead, this time, but they sure did high-tail it away from the order coruscant him the second they could. also in which obi-wan and padmé are FRIENDS GODDAMMIT. (spoiler: there is a sappy ending to this one, it’s not just angst)

part 3 of ?, also on ao3, if you prefer

—

Obi-Wan doesn’t meet the twins until months after their birth.

—

The moment he arrived on Coruscant after everything on Utapau—with the 212th trailing behind him in waves because he hadn’t even spoken to Cody before the urgency in the living and unifying Force, united and tearing at him like loth-wolves, drove him into his fighter—he rushed to the Temple just in time to meet Mace and Ahsoka…and Anakin.

After it all spilled out of them, in fits and starts between the Temple hangar and the halls of healing; Maul and Ahsoka and Palpatine and Anakin and Palpatine’s last, desperate attempt to reach him commlink, the mystery of who he could call for support hanging over their heads—

Except for his many, many trips to the Senate rotunda, where he gives in to the urge to verbally savage every Senator that gets in his way, he doesn’t…leave it. The Temple.

He just hits a wall. It’s finally too much.

Ahsoka and Maul.

Anakin and Palpatine.

Years of being denied the sanctity of his home for more than a week at a time, months and months apart, push him to hole up and dig his heels in. If any senator or commander or lesser general wants to speak to him, they can very well come to him, or fuck off, because if they can’t deign to do that it can’t be that important.

Anakin delivers his resignation to the High Council mere hours before he departs Coruscant entirely—ostensibly for Naboo, though his frequent meetings with Rex, Cody, Aayla, Bly, Plo Koon and Wolffe, among others, build a suspicion in the back of Obi-Wan’s mind that he does them the courtesy of ignoring.

Padmé leaves with him.

Ahsoka leaves days after that, on some relief mission for Bail Organa, having apparently been knighted by Yoda and Yoda alone. Another one of their traditions dead and gone, then. Another piece of their culture denied to them by the effects of three years of utterly pointless conflict.

Mace wanders through the Temple like a silent guardian, grief and terrible truths lying in wait in his eyes, but he rarely speaks of them. He rarely speaks at all, still contemplating some revelation the end of the war and destruction of the Sith has afforded him. His silence has certainly been noticed by the other members of the High Council, and the senators who expend the effort to pay particular attention to the Head of the Order. At some point, Depa and Caleb take to wandering the Temple with him, towering pillars of support.

Quinlan left before he ever really came back, unable to comprehend reverting to the way things were, three years and entire lifetimes ago.

So…so many of them never came back at all. So many faces Obi-Wan will never see again. Some names, he has to search in the Temple records to discover their fate, because a dead Jedi became such a common occurrence that there are those who slipped through the grasp of his memory.

His master, and his master’s master, and his padawan, all gone.

When the clones defect—defect, they haven’t gone to the other side, they’ve simply decided that with no war to fight, the government that bought their lives and deaths had no say in their future. It’s not like there even is or ever was an “other side,” no matter what the shattered remains of the CIS parliament like to claim. When they leave, when they claim their freedom, it isn’t a surprise. Not in the least because Anakin never met a subtle bone in his body he didn’t want to break.

Cody sends him a message with coordinates, “just in case.” And then, nothing.

Nothing.

Obi-Wan meditates in his rooms and walks through the Temple Gardens and visits the Senate whenever they build to some sort of obstinance in their proceedings he feels the need to quash personally or some senator believes the Jedi or the GAR have something to answer for.

If anyone wants to see him, that’s what he’ll be doing. They can come find him.

—

Padmé came to him. Back on Coruscant two months after the twins’ birth—and it was twins, he knows that much, at least—a whole month before she claimed she would return her duties when she left, and eight months before Naboo would have even though to ask it of her; to the surprise of not a single soul she’s ever met.

After a week of delivering impassioned speeches in the Senate, meeting with almost every member of the opposition to gauge their thoughts on how rebuilding was going, and, if Obi-Wan knows her at all, quietly inquiring after the potential candidates for a new Supreme Chancellor, she appears out of nowhere at the Temple’s entrance, demanding to be let in to see him.

Security at the Temple is…fraught. The bombing made their wartime policies even more stringent, and they haven’t relaxed them yet; even a galactic senator can’t enter without a Jedi to sponsor it.

She’s dressed discreetly, too, in a vaguely familiar vest that’s clearly made of the Naboo’s answer to armorweave. There are no visible weapons on her person, but he has no doubt she’s armed, even here.

“Obi-Wan,” she says warmly, grasping his hand tightly when he reaches out to greet her.

“Padmé,” he returns, dipping his head.

“Shall we?” She says, turning somehow, inexorably, in the direction of his quarters, far away as they are, as a kind of hint.

He raises a brow, “Indeed,” and takes it, letting her lead them out of amused curiosity, and wondering when she had the time to memorize any part of the Temple’s layout. Her capacity to do so, he has no doubt of; nor her ability to gain access to those records.

Tea is offered and accepted, and with the opening ritual complete, everything left unsaid between them fills the air to the point of tension.

Padmé wraps her hands around her mug and lets out a long, slow sigh, some measure of her composure seeping away.

“How are you, really?” Obi-Wan says softly.

“Well, the afterpains have finally petered off,” Padmé says wryly, giving him a look.

A measure of regret stirs like an ache in his chest. “Congratulations on your children, Padmé; and forgive me for taking this long to express how happy I am for you.”

“Thank you.”

They sit in silence, sipping at their tea, and Obi-Wan wonders if he’ll ever manage to untangle the complicated grief and anger woven around him, a tangled net that pulls and tears with every breath. Wonders if he’ll ever speak to any of these people he holds so dear without the weight of everything they’ve done pressing down on him. All those secrets. All that violence.

“Are we friends?” Padmé asks abruptly, forcing him to meet and hold her gaze with sheer force of will. “I’d like to think that we are, after all this time.”

“I would, too,” Obi-Wan returns, and the ache in his chest throbs. He can’t just say yes, can he? Because it would be a lie, and he’s so tired of lying. He’s so…tired.

She smiles, kind, but sad, because she can see what he isn’t saying. “You are my friend,” Padmé straightens her spine. “And I’m worried about you, Obi-Wan. Staying holed up in the Temple isn’t doing you any favors.”

“Yes, well, running away from it won’t solve any problems, either,” he snaps, and closes his eyes regretfully.

“Is that why you’re angry with me? Because you think I ran away from all the problems here on Coruscant?” She raises an eyebrow at him. “Or is that why you’re angry at Anakin, and you’re just taking it out on me, too?” She says scathingly. But there’s an undercurrent of hurt flowing through the Force around her.

“I never said I was—” no, he swallows that, because he is angry, and he still doesn’t want to lie. Even if it would be kinder. “Yes. Alright, I am angry at the both of you. At the Senate, at Palpatine, and the Order, and Ahsoka, and—Force, I’m just angry, Padmé, all the time, because not a damn thing any of us have done in the last three years seems to matter, anymore. None of it ever mattered!” He doesn’t yell, but he knows his agitation is bleeding from him like an open wound in the Force. “We were all just pawns to him! You, handing him the chancellorship on a platter,” he spits, “Anakin letting himself be led down the path to the dark without saying a Force-dammed word to anyone, and then running away, yes, because Force forbid he ever ask for help! Me, leading an army of enslaved men to their deaths for a contrived political game without ever stopping to consider the larger picture. Dooku was right; Qui-Gon would be so ashamed of me. Of what the Order has become,” he finishes bitterly.

“You think you’re the only one who’s angry?” Padmé leans in, setting her mug aside to wholly pin him in place with her eyes. “The system of government I’ve dedicated my life to is crumbling still, even while we watch. Our ability to govern democratically is slipping through our fingers like so much water, and the one thing—” her voice cracks, and she swallows. “The one thing in my entire life I’ve ever done just because I wanted it, because it felt right, and it made me stronger, and damn the consequences—well. It turns out you can’t damn the consequences after all.” She pushes away from the table and covers her eyes. “Shit. I’m going to go home in another month or two or ten and my children won’t even recognize me, Obi-Wan. Because I have to be here, fixing what we broke.

“If it even can be fixed,” she finishes softly, hand still drawn over her face.

Obi-Wan huffs and tries to lodge the burning in his eyes back underneath that overwhelming fog of exhaustion. “Is it really that bad?”

“We still haven’t elected another Chancellor, and at this point, the Galactic Senate can’t function without one. There are plenty of systems who have more than half a mind to let it all just…crumble back to our planetary foundations.”

“I take it you won’t be suggesting yourself as a candidate?” He tries engaging in politics instead to bury it, a desperate last resort. “I’m sure Anakin, at least, has put the idea forth,” he adds.

She lets her hand drag down her face so as to give him another look. “Yes, and that’s why he’s still on Naboo with our children, instead of here. Naboo cannot lead the Republic again, not after Palpatine kept his seat for so long.”

“Too long,” Obi-Wan mutters into his mug, trying to douse his bitterness with tea. His attempt to flee his feelings is caught in the tangled net they weave, neatly attempting to strangle him. “What about Bail?”

“He would do it, if we asked, but I don’t want to put that on his head.” She tips her head to the side. “Plus, there are any number of former Separatist planets thinking about rejoining the Republic—if it even still exists—that would balk at the idea of a Chancellor from so deep in the core; from a founding member of the Republic.”

“Hmm. That would rule out Senator Mothma as well, then.”

“Yes,” Padmé gives him a small grin. “We need an incorruptible figure who will immediately move to give up the emergency powers we’ve loaded onto the Chancellorship; with no ties to Palpatine, preferably from the Mid Rim, or even the Outer Rim Territories; who furthermore can actually do the job.”

“Yes, that is a bit of a tall order.”

“Honestly, half the reason the Republic is still standing is because the Jedi stepped in to end the war.”

He runs a hand over his jaw slowly. “And the other half is Ahsoka. Perhaps we should ask her opinion on this mess, supposing we could catch her during her brief stop-overs on Coruscant.”

“Obi-Wan,” Padmé chides, with prideprotectionlonging leaking from her like a sieve in the Force.

Silence falls again, and Obi-Wan breathes, in, out; in, out, before topping off both their mugs and leaning away from the table, new warmth leaching into his hands.

The Force nudges his mind. He lets his eyes fall halfway shut, hears: perhaps we should ask her opinion on this mess, feels: a cold so pervasive it sinks into his bones and makes his next exhale visible, sees: a spear struck deep into the ground like a declaration.

Before he can let that premonition crystalize into any real particular insight, Padmé clears her throat. “Obi-Wan, I—” she stops. “I just wanted—” and again. “I’ve missed you, these months. I missed you when the twins were born, and I think I still miss you now even when you’re right in front of me.” A fiercer kind of longing rises in her, so visceral Obi-Wan can feel it in the back of his own throat. “You are my friend,” she repeats, “and I, I would like it very much if you would come back to Naboo with me and meet my children.”

His lips part uselessly while he searches for something to say. “Padmé, I…”

“I want them to know you,” she plants her demands more certainly in front of him. “And if that means I have to banish my husband to Sola’s house for a week so you can keep hiding from each other, so be it. But you’re my friend, too, and I want them to know you.”

The longing stretches between them, latching onto him until it feels like his own. And maybe it is. He can’t quite picture what that would be like; picture what twin fusions of two of his dearest friends will look like, what holding them in his arms will inspire in him. He doesn’t, overwhelming realization striking him, even know their names, and admits as much.

“Luke,” Padmé smiles reflexively, like the sun breaking through the clouds. “And Leia.”

A sigh of relief floods through the Force around them like a dam driven to bursting, and Obi-Wan blinks back more tears. Second sunset in a familiar-unfamiliar desert. Cool clear mountain air. Burnished hope tucked away to grow unimpeded.

“Luke.” He repeats roughly. “Leia.”

—

Their weight in his arms is devastatingly familiar, somehow, and he loves Anakin and Padmé twice over for creating such incredible beings.

And when they open their eyes and wave their hands and feet in the air, blinding twin presences in the Force reaching for him so delicately, his shields unfurl like solar sails, immediately attuned to them.

A Feeling strikes him. “Oh, I’m in so much trouble,” he breathes down at them, and feels warm with their attention.

Luke coos. Leia burbles back.

“Yes, yes I am,” he says in a stronger, sillier tone, the way all younglings should be spoken to.

Anakin just laughs at him. “That’s just what Ahsoka said.”

Obi-Wan can’t even scrounge up the urge to be cross with him, still enraptured by these tiny beautiful little people. What an excellent shield they’ll make for their idiot father, whenever one of his loved ones could just shake him with frustration.

—

part 1, part 2

#obi-wan kenobi #padmé amidala #honorable mention: beautiful cinnamon rolls luke and leia naberrie #too good for this world too pure #star w #star wars fanfiction #fic #vague galactic politics #also lmk if you figured out who i want to make chancellor #its fucking wild but i stand by it #look obi-wan is very very angry about very many things #and he's right to be #his whole goddamn life has been kind of traumatic #the war is just the latest bit #but he's gotta admit it to himself before he can get anywhere close to better #also talk to me about dutiful 'leader of an entire planet at 14' padmé #who marries a guy she's known for less than a month total #in a whirlwind secret romance #and then wants to settle down and have babies and raise them with him #except...for how she also wants to create a lasting strong democracy #sometimes these things fit together #sometimes they clash #its A Lot #force visions #sorta

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aion-rsa · 5 years ago

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The Scariest Star Trek Episodes

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Looking for some space-based thrills and chills to enjoy this Halloween? Have no fear – or have a lot of fear, actually – Star Trek has you covered! We’ve listed 28 of the scariest episodes from across the franchise in order of just how much they freaked us out, so whether your preference is for deep space exploration, war-torn space stations, or the far reaches of the known universe, there’s something here for you.

This list excludes all of the feature films, which tend to be scarier on the whole as they’re aiming to make an impact on a cinema audience (Star Trek II: The Wrath Of Khan and Star Trek: First Contact have some especially terrifying sequences). It also excludes The Animated Series and Lower Decks. The Animated Series is seriously under-rated, but it’s bright, colourful style and slightly lighter tone don’t really bring the scares. Lower Decks features lots of blood, guts, gore, zombies and a giant spider to rival Shelob – and that’s just in the first episode! – but it’s basically satire, so none of it really comes across as scary.

This list is also firmly focused on spooky Halloween chills. There are many, many episodes of Star Trek from across the franchise that deal with torture or moral murkiness. We’re not looking for episodes that will make you question whether it’s possible to be a good person in a harsh universe, but for classic horror movie scares – creepy set-ups, scary scenarios, and spooky chills.

28. The Original Series: season 2, episode 7 ‘Catspaw’

This episode isn’t really all that different from the many The Original Series episodes where some implausibly powerful alien being plays dangerous games with the crew that include a hefty dose of fantasy, but the Halloween-style setting gives it a spooky vibe. Captain Kirk tries to use his sexual allure to solve the problem, of course, and completely disrupts an alien relationship through sheer force of his masculinity. But all is well in the end, though the scene where the villain uses sympathetic magic to over-heat the Enterprise as she dangles a model of it over a candle flame is pretty freaky.

One to avoid if you’re scared of: Cheesy Halloween set-ups.

27. Voyager: season 5, episode 18 ‘Course Oblivion’

The idea that you might not be who you think you are has a clear existential horror to it, and this isn’t the only episode on this list based on that concept. It’s really more sad than scary as the truth of the situation is discovered about halfway through, and once the entire crew realise they’re not human after all, but recent copies of the original Voyager crew, they’re too concerned with the fact that they’re dying in vast numbers to dwell much on the personal horror of their position. Even knowing they aren’t the original crew, watching these beloved characters die one by one is gut-wrenching, and the final moments are truly the stuff of nightmares – they’re so close to help, but just can’t cry out…

One to avoid if you’re scared of: Disintegration, ship-wide destruction.

26. Enterprise: season 2, episode 4 ‘Dead Stop’

Creepiness doesn’t have to come from old houses, dark streets, and rooms full of shadows. It can also come from bright, white light and empty spaces. Threats don’t have to be immediately obvious – they can come cloaked in what looks like kindness and generosity. With creepy direction from Voyager’s Roxann Dawson, who also voices the mysterious computer, and the always unnerving theme of a computer killing organic lifeforms, this creates an unsettling vibe without the schlocky Halloween staples. Throw in a classic fake order from a convincing-sounding voice, the apparent death of a regular character (not an uncommon occurrence on Star Trek, it has to be said), and Archer’s desperate plea, familiar to all of us who’ve ever called a helpline, of “I need to talk to a person!”, and you’ve got a pleasantly unsettling hour of television.

One to avoid if you’re scared of: Automated telephone helplines.

25. Deep Space Nine: season 2, episode 14 ‘Whispers’

This isn’t the only episode on this list about the horror of discovering you aren’t who you thought you were, or about a family member who isn’t their usual self. But it does offer a different, and equally disturbing, take on the idea. For most of this episode, we follow Chief O’Brien as he returns to Deep Space Nine, only to find the behaviour of everyone around him is just a little… off. The ending is tragically moving, but the bulk of the episode is increasingly disconcerting, with O’Brien unable to trust anyone or to work out what could possibly have happened while he was away. It plays into fears deeper than the fear of things that go bump in the night – the fear that your friends and family might drift away from you, or turn on you, or pull apart from you. And that’s one of the scariest things of all.

One to avoid if you’re scared of: Being abandoned, your boss and colleagues turning on you.

24. Voyager: season 6, episode 25 ‘The Haunting Of Deck Twelve’

Voyager’s Borg children get a campfire story from Neelix addressing the apparently ‘haunted’ Deck 12. It’s a space alien, of course, but it has its moments providing some good scares and another opportunity for the Voyager crew to nearly abandon ship (something they make more of a habit of than they should considering they’re lost in the Delta Quadrant). The campfire ghost story set-up adds a nice sense of Halloween fun to the tale, there’s some nice character work (Neelix’s frequent fear of darkness and nothingness comes up, and his love/hate relationship with Tuvok) and there are some scary moments – after all, how do you outrun a gas cloud?

One to avoid if you’re scared of: Gas, nebulas.

23. The Next Generation: season 7, episode 19 ‘Genesis’

This one is too terrible an episode to get any higher on the list – we really can’t recommend it as an actually good episode of Star Trek. But it’s here because you can’t deny that as the Enterprise crew slowly de-evolve and regress to earlier phases of evolution from their respective species, the effects are genuinely unnerving, as well as occasionally laughable. Voyager’s ‘Threshold’ (frequently referred to as the worst episode of Star Trek of all time) similarly includes some effective body horror before it descends into ludicrousness and people start turning into lizards and abandoning their lizard babies, but is too silly to include – this one, however, hangs on just long enough to produce some real scares. It helps that the crew are de-evolving, rather than evolving into an apparently higher form.

One to avoid if you’re scared of: Spiders, lizards, lemurs, and terrifying human-animal hybrids.

22. The Next Generation: season 4, episode 17 ‘Night Terrors’

One of several ‘waking nightmare’ episodes, this one is let down a bit by the somewhat unconvincing scenes of Troi flying through a weird green skyscape, but there are plenty of properly creepy moments to enjoy. Dr Crusher’s hallucination of a roomful of corpses sitting up is a standout, but Picard thinking the turbolift is shrinking in on him is alarming too, and the scraps of audio revealing what happened to the late crew of the USS Brattain, who murdered each other in the grip of paranoid hallucinations, are chilling. The science behind the idea, that we need REM sleep to be able to function, is solid, which makes the whole thing even more frightening.

One to avoid if you’re scared of: Corpses, insomnia.

21. Voyager: season 2, episode 8 ‘Persistence of Vision’

Over the course of seven years, Voyager did so many episodes in which almost the whole crew were knocked out, suffered from hallucinations, put to sleep in a collective dream or otherwise mentally trapped by aliens, that they made a reference to it in season seven’s ‘Shattered’. This one is a good choice for Halloween, though, thanks to some nicely spooky imagery. It featured Janeway’s Victorian Gothic holo-novel and so her hallucinations include a ghostly little girl in Victorian clothes having a tantrum about cucumber sandwiches, which is particularly unsettling. It also features an unusually ‘evil’ and mysterious villain who has no motive other than being a nasty character and vanishes into thin air, and allows Kes to really shine at the climax, showing off her own considerable powers.

One to avoid if you’re scared of: Creepy children, massive boils leaking pus.

20. The Next Generation: season 1, episode 25 ‘Conspiracy’

This episode is remembered for one thing and one thing only – the exploding head. And the alien chest-burster incident that comes right after it. Although the ending seems to hint at a wider threat, it was never officially followed up on within the series, possibly partly because this episode was so much gorier than anything seen on Star Trek up to that date. It also experienced some mutations of its own in development. What was originally intended to be a conspiracy within Starfleet was nixed by then-still-alive Gene Roddenberry as not conforming to his utopian vision. Perhaps this is why, to make up for the less psychologically disturbing conspiracy-by-alien-outsider, the production team went all out on the gore at the episode’s climax. It’s certainly memorable!

One to avoid if you’re scared of: Gore, alien chest-bursters.

19. Voyager: season 3, episode 18 ‘Darkling’

Robert Picardo hams it up gloriously in this homage to Jekyll and Hyde. The idea behind the episode, that when the Doctor patches the personalities of famous people into his program he gets their dark sides as well as their good qualities, is a neat concept and an interesting thought. The actual way these dark sides manifest is a bit bland, being focused mostly on general evil gurning and an obsession with Kes that twists the Doctor’s own genuine feelings for her into something more sinister. There was more subtlety to William Shatner’s Evil Kirk in ‘The Enemy Within’. But it does the job of providing some chilling moments, especially when B’Elanna finds herself at the mercy of the Evil Doctor.

One to avoid if you’re scared of: Doctors, creepy stalkers.

18. Discovery: season 1, episode 3 ‘Context Is For Kings’

This is only the third episode of Discovery, and the first to be set on the titular ship, so it’s our introduction to much of the crew and to the series in general. At this early point, it looked like Discovery was heading in a very dark and horror-tinged direction indeed. With Gabriel Lorca as Captain, Burnham still a prisoner, and Stamets at his frostiest, the series already promised to be ‘darker’ – and then we find out the grisly fate of Discovery’s sister ship’s crew, turned inside out, their bodies twisted and mangled. The rest of the series so far has gone to plenty of morally and emotionally dark places, but for sheer scares and perhaps a little queasiness, this is the one to watch.

One to avoid if you’re scared of: Gore, morally dubious Starfleet captains

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17. The Original Series: season 1, episode 1 ‘The Man Trap’

Star Trek starts as it means to go on – the very first episode to air is one of the creepy ones (and the earlier pilots are both pretty unsettling as well). The main reason it’s remembered as a scary one is the great creature design on the Monster of the Week, the Salt Vampire. The combination of gaping, toothy mouth, drooping eyes and Yeti-like body is impressively inventive. But there’s an emotional core to this episode as well, as Dr McCoy’s ex turns out to have been killed by the creature long ago. Her husband’s willing acceptance of the creature that killed her as a replacement is probably the creepiest thing of all.

One to avoid if you’re scared of: Shapeshifters, the Yeti.

16. The Next Generation: season 7, episode 6 ‘Phantasms’

Another nightmare episode, but it’s not originality we’re giving points for here. The plot of this episode is fairly basic and the key concept of seeing nightmares is one we can see plenty of elsewhere – it’s not even the only ‘nightmare episode’ from The Next Generation. But the reason both appear on this list is because, while the concept may not be stunningly original, and the episodes may even be rather cheesy, the bizarre images we see in them are genuinely unnerving. The Troi-cake may be often mocked, but it really is a freaky image, iffy visual effects notwithstanding. Add to that Dr Crusher drinking from Riker’s head and a phone inside Data’s body, and you have a good set of weird images to freak yourself out with this Halloween.

One to avoid if you’re scared of: Being eaten, being drunk from.

15. Enterprise: season 3, episode 16 ‘Doctor’s Orders’

One of two episodes on this list directed by Voyager’s Roxann Dawson, who clearly has a good eye for a creepy set-up. The plot has something of a connection to Voyager as well, as it’s essentially a re-tread of the Voyager episode ‘One’; most of the crew are put to sleep for medical protection while one or two, immune, crew-members are left to roam the ship alone. The earlier episode featured a longer period of isolation and a more vulnerable crew-member (former Borg Seven of Nine, who had a terror of being alone), but this one just edged it onto the list thanks to a few details. It has some welcome comedy beats breaking up the repetitive nature of isolation (Phlox wandering around naked is a nice touch) and Phlox consciously refers to the situation as a ‘haunted house’ for a reason, as it deliberately draws on classic tropes like rattling chains, dark shadows, and strange noises. Also this one includes a cute dog. A spooky story can always be enhanced by throwing in a cute dog.

One to avoid if you’re scared of: Haunted houses (or spaceships), giant insects.

14. Deep Space Nine: season 3, episode 26 ‘The Adversary’

This was the third season finale, and it opens with Sisko recording “my final Commander’s log” – that’s because he’s been promoted to Captain, but it creates a sense of finality, of the closing of a door, from the start. It makes the subsequent paranoia-inducing hunt for an enemy who could be disguised as any member of the crew – a Changeling – even more tense. Odo says no Changeling would ever harm another, so you know what’s going to happen by the end of the episode, but it’s well made; claustrophobic, with echoes of The Thing and body snatcher themes (without the actual snatching). No one knows who to trust and everyone is getting trigger-happy – foreshadowing the increasing violence that would become a feature of the series as it moved towards a war storyline in the future. And Sisko has barely been Captain five minutes when he gets to play with the auto-destruct, as all Starfleet Captains love to do every now and again.

One to avoid if you’re scared of: Sleeper agents, clones.

13. Deep Space Nine: season 5, episode 5 ‘The Assignment’

A lot of the episodes on this list take a classic horror fantasy trope and give it a science-fiction mask – ghosts that are gaseous aliens, witches that are telepathically powerful aliens, vampires that are after salt rather than blood. This one is a science-fiction take on demon possession, as poor Chief O’Brien is told that his wife has been taken over by a malevolent entity, but he can’t tell anyone else without risking her life and his daughter’s. Key to the whole thing is a great performance from Rosalind Chao, whose manner and bearing through the whole thing is definitely that of a new character who is not Keiko.

One to avoid if you’re scared of: Demon possession.

12. Enterprise: season 2, episode 10 ‘Vanishing Point’

There are a number of Star Trek episodes where various crew-members think they’re dead and wandering the ship’s passageways as a ghost (and one slightly odd episode of Voyager, ‘Cathexis’, where Chakotay literally does so). Most focus on the impact of the apparent loss on the other crew, contemplations of the afterlife, and so on. In this episode, though, Hoshi first experiences unsettling body horror as birthmarks move and her translation skills fade, then seems to be becoming a ghost slowly, unable to touch things properly and even starting to vanish entirely. It’s far more spooky and freaky than the usual ‘out of phase’ storyline. And here’s an extra dose of horror – all this seemed to happen to Hoshi during the 8.3 seconds she was in the transporter buffer. So what exactly did Scotty go through when he ended up stuck in there for 80 years in The Next Generation’s ‘Relics’?!

One to avoid if you’re scared of: Turning invisible, matter transporters.

11. The Original Series: season 3, episode 4 ‘And The Children Shall Lead’

Before we get to the opening credits of this episode, we’ve already seen a group of children dance around happily singing a strange version of ‘Ring a Ring a Roses’ at the site of a mass adult suicide. Do you need to know more than that?! Later on, they all move round in a circle chanting a call to a ‘friendly angel’ which produces a green, translucent being wanting universal control (as usual) and they set about driving the crew of the Enterprise mad using bizarre hallucinations including premature ageing, planets that aren’t there, and so on. I mean, if that summary doesn’t creep you out, you’re either a sadistic small child or a power-mad translucent green alien yourself. As a bonus, it has a genuinely affecting ending, too, as the full horror of what happened to their parents hits the children.

One to avoid if you’re scared of: Creepy children, children in general.

10. Voyager: season 3, episode 15 ‘Coda’

This episode is another “I’m dead!” fakeout, in which a crew-member – in this case Captain Janeway – appears to have died and seems to be watching their friends mourn them as a ghost. This one has a couple of twists though. There’s a time loop element with Janeway experiencing repeated deaths of different kinds in different loops. And then, just to really freak us out, a sinister alien tries to convince Janeway to follow him to the afterlife, even implying that he is waiting at the point of death for her, and everyone else, whenever and wherever she eventually dies. It seems far more likely he’s just a creepy Delta Quadrant alien trying to harvest something, somehow (a soul eater? does he eat life force?) but it’s still a deeply disturbing concept.

One to avoid if you’re scared of: Death and dying.

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9. The Next Generation: season 3, episode 26 ‘The Best Of Both Worlds, Pt 1’

The Borg were first introduced in the episode ‘Q Who’, and they were fairly terrifying then. Their total lack of interest in anything they don’t perceive to be a threat ironically makes them so much more frightening than they would be if they attacked others on sight, while their cybernetic implants and collective consciousness give them a ghoulish creepiness. But however terrifying they seemed at first, they became so much scarier again when their main method of conquering was introduced – assimilation. Even in this episode, there’s not a whisper of it for most of the story – until the captured Captain Picard turns to face Beverley (and the camera) to reveal a face full of Borg technology. “He is a Borg!” as Worf exclaims. On first viewing, with no idea it was coming, it was a serious shock, and seriously scary.

One to avoid if you’re scared of: Cyborgs, Oxo cubes.

8. Deep Space Nine: season 4, episode 24 ‘The Quickening’

We had to include this one, in which Dr Bashir desperately tries to help people suffering from ‘the Blight’, a fatal illness caused by a biological weapon long before the story starts. It’s not an infectious disease, but it is passed from mother to child through the generations, and society has completely reformed around it, developing a system of ritualised euthanasia as the only method they have for dealing with it. I trust there’s no need to spell out exactly what is so scary about this scenario. It’s also extremely depressing. There’s some hope at the end, for Ekoria’s baby at least, but it’s small comfort after the harrowing grimness of the rest of the episode. To be honest, we’re not sure we’d entirely recommend watching this episode right now, unless you’re in the mood for some serious wallowing. But it is definitely scary. Very, very scary.

One to avoid if you’re scared of: Biological weapons, plagues.

7. Enterprise: season 3, episode 5 ‘Impulse’

Often, the scariest or most impactful episodes have the shortest cold opens. This Enterprise episode drops us straight into the action with a screaming T’Pol brought into sickbay, clearly out of control – and cut to credits. Now that is the way to unsettle an audience from the start! Jolene Blalock puts in a great, unhinged performance and the shaky camerawork all adds to the feeling of horror, so by the time we flash back one day to find out what’s happened, we’re prepped for horror. The rest of the episode plays out in classic space horror movie style, all darkness and noises and flashing lights, everyone running around looking filthy and sweaty being chased by Vulcan zombies while poor T’Pol descends further and further into madness. A 45-minute mini horror movie.

One to avoid if you’re scared of: Your own strong emotions, zombies.

6. Deep Space Nine: season 5, episode 24 ‘Empok Nor’

This one is another horror movie in miniature. You know things are going to go seriously wrong when a handful of regular characters go on a mission with a collection of character who, if they were in The Original Series, would probably be wearing red shirts. This episode, in which our heroes go scavenging on Deep Space Nine’s abandoned sister station and discover some unhinged Cardassians, has got dark corridors, a diminishing cast, a regular character under the influence of psychotropic drugs becoming dangerous, and the odd jump scare. It gives Andrew Robinson as Garek an always welcome chance to play the more sinister side of the character, and keeps the tension running high throughout.

One to avoid if you’re scared of: Dark corridors, slasher movies.

5. The Original Series: season 2, episode 14: ‘Wolf in the Fold’

A number of original series episodes are scary in the wrong way, for the wrong reasons. Despite Star Trek’s overt efforts to combat sexism in its own way, it was still a deeply sexist show made in a sexist time, and could be outright misogynistic on occasion (the very last episode, ‘Turnabout Intruder’, is probably the worst offender). But ‘Wolf In The Fold’ blends the rather less enjoyable creepiness of women being objectified with some properly horrifying chills. It’s implied through much of the story that Scotty might be a serial killer, which is genuinely unsettling, as it plays into the very real fear that anyone around you, someone you feel you know well, could be hiding a dark secret. While the eventual reveal that he has somehow been possessed by Jack the Ripper (who was an alien life form possessing a human, of course) offers some comfort there, the idea that a Victorian serial killer entity has been travelling around killing women for centuries is certainly frightening.

One to avoid if you’re scared of: Serial killers, Scotty.

4. The Next Generation: season 6, episode 21 ‘Frame Of Mind’

Poor Riker. He’s just finished performing in a play in which he plays a man kept locked up, drugged, and experiencing a mental breakdown, and he gets abducted by aliens who keep him locked up, drug him, and force him to question what is or isn’t real, provoking a mental breakdown. What were the chances, eh?! Jumping between his usual role on the Enterprise and being a patient in a mental institution who has committed some horrible crime, it becomes increasingly difficult to work out what’s ‘real’, and in the end, just about none of what we saw was real at all – except for Riker’s very real imprisonment by a hostile alien. Jonathan Frakes puts in a wonderfully frazzled performance in an episode that will make your head spin, leaving the audience as confused as Riker is.

One to avoid if you’re scared of: Mental institutions, being imprisoned.

3. Voyager: season 4, episode 7 ‘Scientific Method’

This is the one where an alien race who keep themselves invisible use the Voyager crew as test subjects for their lab experiments. The initial mystery is intriguing, but it’s after the reveal that things get really alarming. What was a frustrating and extremely familiar medical problem for Janeway, recurrent headaches, becomes a terrifying visual as we see the aliens surrounding the oblivious Captain, sticking enormous needles into her brain. Then, in one of the more chilling and uncomfortable sequences of television you’re likely to see, Seven of Nine, the only person able to see them, must then ignore them completely while they probe her as she takes the turbolift. Luckily Janeway puts a stop to it by flying right at some binary pulsars, and these aliens are so scary that actually seems like a good idea.

One to avoid of you’re scared of: Scientists, needles.

2. The Next Generation: season 6, episode 5 ‘Schisms’

There’s a recurring theme to a lot of the scariest episodes in this list – body horror. It’s what steps the Borg up to becoming even more terrifying than they already were, it’s what makes ‘Scientific Method’ so incredibly chilling, and it’s a big part of what makes ‘Schisms’ one of Star Trek’s all-time most unsettling episodes. The revelation that Riker has had his limbs amputated and re-attached is simply horrifying. Combine that with a classic alien abduction story and the incredibly unsettling, insect-like clicking noise the abductors make, and you have a properly scary alien abduction horror story to rival The X-Files (one of the biggest shows on television at the time it aired).

One to avoid if you’re scared of: Alien abduction.

1. Voyager: season 2, episode 23 ‘The Thaw’

Ranking these episodes in pure terms of how freaking terrifying they are, this instalment easily comes out at number one. Coming out shortly before The Matrix, this episode features a similar premise, that if the brain is hooked up to a virtual environment, a lethal shock within the virtual world might kill the person. But it’s taken in a very different direction, for the friendly aliens who initially went into the virtual environment to while away a long time in stasis have been taken hostage by a virtual clown and his circus troupe, the manifestation of their fears run amok. So basically, they’re trapped in an unending nightmare, kept in a state of constant, perpetual fear by a garish collection of unnerving characters. The entire episode is one terrifying set-piece after another, with a fantastically energetic performance by Michael McKean as the Clown. It’s all so scary it’s downright uncomfortable. Thank goodness for Janeway’s last minute insight into what Fear really wants – to be conquered.

One to avoid if you’re scared of: Clowns.

HONOURABLE MENTIONS

The Original Series: season 3, episode 12 ‘The Empath’

A number of Star Trek episodes deal with torture, and we’ve tended to leave them off this list as they’re really more upsetting, disturbing, or tragic than chill-down-your-spine scary. This one is pretty freaky, though.

The Original Series: season 3, episode 7 ‘The Day Of The Dove’

Much of this episode is a fairly standard early Klingons episode, albeit with a mysterious glow cloud (all hail!) floating around and swords appearing out of thin air. But when Sulu tells Kirk that the dead brother Chekov has been talking about all episode long never existed, we realise something stranger is going on.

Voyager: season 4, episode 25 ‘One’

Pretty similar in concept and execution to both ‘Persistence of Vision’ and ‘Doctor’s Orders’ (and coming right between the two). Still a scary concept, though.

Discovery: season 2, episode 12 ‘Through the Valley of Shadows’

Pike’s willing acceptance of his fate – and the fact we know it’s accurate from The Original Series – is heroic, tragic, and chilling all in one.

Picard: season 1, episode 6 ‘The Impossible Box’

Think about what happens at this episode’s climax from Soji’s point of view, as the person she trusts the most reveals that she’s not even human and then tries to kill her, and recoil in horror.

Lower Decks: season 1, episode 1 ‘Second Contact’

As mentioned above, this episode features plenty of classic horror tropes including blood, guts, gore, vomit, zombies and a giant spider. Watch it for some light relief after you’ve worked your way through the rest of the list!

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(Dis)-honourable mention: The Next Generation: season 7, episode 14 ‘Sub Rosa’, aka The One Where Bev Boinks A Ghost. It’s too ridiculous to be properly scary, but there is a half-decent ghost story buried in there somewhere.

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‘Murder on the Orient Express’ (2017): A Film Review

This review is dedicated to Sarah; the greatest Agatha Christie fan I know.

It’s difficult for me to describe an Agatha Christie murder mystery to people who have never experienced one. For one thing, I’m not sure that I, having only ever seen her stories depicted in TV series and specials, can say that I qualify as an expert on her novels or the main themes and characteristics of her writing. But from what I understand, these adaptations are pretty faithful to the plot of each respective story, and the performances and presentation on display is often done with great respect to the characters of the source material. Watching those same TV adaptations is also something that I love to connect with other people over. My family have always enjoyed watching episodes of Poirot and Miss Marple, I’ve gone to a few murder mystery parties with a Christie-esque flavour, I’m a sucker for the board game Cluedo (which owes a lot of its content and style to the Christie template), and my girlfriend enjoys the aesthetic and framework of Christie murder mysteries immensely. Familiarity with Agatha Christie’s stories practically existing as their own subgenre in the field of murder mystery in the same way Film Noir does feels second nature to me by this point. That’s why providing context for this film feels difficult. How do you describe something you take for granted will be familiar to the person you’re speaking to?

Agatha Christie stories typically focus on crimes committed in the 1920s and this early part of the 20th century. More often than not, these crimes are murder, and there is a particularly gifted individual who is on hand to assist the police in their investigations. Given the sheer number of stories Christie has written, the setting of these stories has spanned the globe, but they most often take place in England, Europe, or, in a few well-known examples, Egypt. A collection of upper class socialites gather together for some occasion before one person ends up dead, murdered in some head-scratching way. It’s up to our lead detective to work out the hows and whys, and uncover the lingering pain of the past that motivates the darker urges hidden just beneath the surface of a society presenting itself as dignified and refined.

In Murder on the Orient Express, our lead detective is Hercule Poirot, an older, well-mannered man from Belgium with impeccable standards of excellence in all things and a sharp eye for inconsistencies. He is kept busy through his work as the cleverest man in the room whenever a crime unfolds, so he takes up an offer from an acquaintance to travel on the luxurious Orient Express and take a holiday. The train of course encounters some problems, and one of the passengers turns up dead, resulting in a ticking clock for Poirot to see if he can solve the case before help arrives, and certain matters about the case lead to the police making a rushed, incorrect arrest.

The decisions the cinematography makes when it comes to how settings are presented in Murder on the Orient Express (2017) are ingenious. The shots of the mountain are, of course, all impressive enough and are filled with awe at the serene beauty of a snow-covered landscape. It would make for an enjoyably seasonal film to watch at Christmas. Admittedly, some of the steps taken to justify a striking shot containing both the characters and the setting are a little silly and difficult to reasonably justify. A flair for the dramatic that goes far enough to start feeling superfluous is to be expected whenever Kenneth Branagh directs a film, from his adaptations of Mary Shelley’s Frankenstein and Hamlet, to Thor, where I’d argue the inherent humour of an over-dramatic approach is used to best effect. Here, however, I would say it comes across as a flaw, at least when it comes to shots of the surrounding landscapes.

But it’s not the mountain or the snow that hooked me, but the interiors of the train. The typical opulent dressings of a Christie mystery are here, and they make for a classy mise-en-scene that is enjoyable to sip away at, as always. But it is how the cramped layout of the inside of the train is shown to us that impresses me most. The cinematography is varied, and often turns the comforting warm rooms on their head to feel like a threatening confined space in which a dangerous killer certainly resides. Interrogations are framed as intimate and dangerous affairs, but they are also shaken up through a mixing of camera angles and skilful use of every part of the train, so Poirot asking his questions never feels repetitive. An extended shot featuring Poirot’s first steps on the train, which acts as our introduction to the Orient Express, is notably effective. It starts with the camera moving right with Poirot as he walks through the station, only to double back on itself as he boards the train, and awkwardly makes his way down the narrow corridor to his space all the way to the back of the train. The setting is established as a claustrophobic space by this long, awkward journey through a busy passageway, the tightness of which is emphasised by the camera staying outside and tracking Poirot as we see him move from window to window. It’s an inspired way to introduce the main setting of a story, especially for a murder mystery.

Finally, the way we experience the discovery of the body is one of the most memorable visual sequences I’ve seen this year. It’s viewed from above, with the audience being able to see the rooms and the borders between them as they look down onto the heads and shoulders of the actors. Essentially, our characters are moving around to different rooms like pieces on a game board; the moment the body is discovered, it becomes a game of Cluedo. What’s more, by not seeing the body, the brutality of the scene and the horrified reactions we see somehow feel so much worse. Despite being given this overhead view that provides us with an omniscient understanding of the layout of this scene, the film denies us the knowledge of what the most important room in the sequence looks like. We are depowered, intrigued, and unnerved at the implications of this ghastly development, even with the knowledge that a murder has to happen on the Orient express.

So how is Branagh’s Poirot? This was always going to be a talking point for many people; Poirot is a rich character, first and foremost, so we like to see how different actors play him, especially if we’re familiar with what that actor has done in the past. But although there have been a surprising number of people who have played Poirot in films, TV, and radio (including Ian Holm and Orson Welles, if you can believe it), it is very difficult to think of him as anyone other than David Suchet. He played the character on Agatha Christie’s Poirot for 24 years, and the composure, sweet lightness of touch, and demanding presence of his performance made Poirot a character we loved to watch. It’s safe to say that, for multiple generations, Suchet IS Poirot. So, seeing Branagh take up a role that a lot of us are very used to only seeing one person play is going to take some adjusting to, no matter how you frame the movie.

In all fairness, however, it has been four years since Suchet finished with the role, and classic literary characters deserve to be interpreted and reinterpreted for as long as their stories matter to us. And honestly, Branagh does very well in the part. Yes, he has once again cast himself in a movie he’s directed as a character renowned for the magnificent grandness of their persona, meaning this feels at times like the classiest excuse for an actor/director to toot his own trumpet on camera. But it honestly works in this case, because Branagh ensures that it’s all in keeping with the character. Poirot is well-mannered, but he is always a straight-talker, and when he talks about his considerable intellect, it’s not all ego; he has good reason to see that as the honest truth. The balance between his generally humble disposition and the matter-of-fact certainty with which he discusses his infallible mind is unique, and very funny. Branagh’s performance walks this line with commendable balance. When asked who he is, his answer “I am Hercule Poirot, and I am probably the greatest detective in the world” is a fine example of that, showcasing that Poirot is very sure of himself, but is also polite enough to add that he is only “probably” the smartest man in the world. I also appreciate how Branagh emphasises the more vulnerable aspects of Poirot’s character. His remembering of a lost love he misses dearly and looks to for guidance, his dignified sadness over the fact that he will never be able to stop noticing the things about the world that seem out of place, and the profound challenge the implications this case and its resolution has on his philosophy are all compelling directions to take the character, and Branagh has the skill to back it up. This is certainly a worthy adaptation of a character with a long history attached to it.

The rest of the cast is an interesting case, because it’s filled with a lot of recognisable, talented faces who would be the main attraction in any other film, but they’re used here to fill out the numbers on the suspect list. You need enough time dedicated to each character so that it becomes feasible that anyone could turn out to be the murderer, and you wouldn’t feel cheated of the proper explanation or build-up of who they are, where they come from, and why they did this. But you also can’t spend too long on any of them, because you run the risk of running out of time to develop one of the other suspects if you don’t properly balance your screen time allowance. There are a few cases where that occurs, especially the male ballet dancer who appears near the start, overacts, reappears much later in the movie, overacts again, and then Poirot resumes his investigation, making him the weak link in the cast. But by filling the suspect list with as much talent as it could get its hands on, the film ends up making every second count. This is a story about pain and heartache, and how, although we often keep it private and hidden away from the wider world, it is also a humanising factor that unites us. As difficult as that emotion is to sell, this accomplished cast manages to display convincing vulnerability again and again. Derek Jacobi, Judi Dench, and Willem Dafoe are all masters that can fill a handful of seconds with more heartfelt emotion than you can deal with without shedding a tear or two yourself. I’m a big fan of Olivia Colman, so it was awesome to see her stand alongside all these greats and show just as much skill at doing an awful lot with very little. Of all of them, the biggest surprise was Josh Gad, as this actor usually known for comedy commits to his character with a firm grasp on how to handle the more demanding moments, making me curious to see what else he can do with drama. There are many others, and they all at the very least do well in their part. As casts go, this is a strong bunch that all understand the shared tone of the movie.

I’ve been curious about Murder on the Orient Express (2017) for most of this year, and while some were underwhelmed, I was really impressed by it. It has inventive cinematography, a cast that work well at showing believable heartache, and a version of Poirot I’m eager to see more of. It’s a classy, sumptuous murder mystery, and tells its story well enough that I wanted to sit and reflect on it for a long while after it had ended.

8/10.

A few characters needed more screen time, and its visual flair occasionally goes one step too far. But this is still a cleverly made film that tells a powerful murder mystery story, and doesn’t disappoint fans of Agatha Christie stories, even if we all know there’s no knocking Suchet from his throne as Hercule Poirot.

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