#probs phantom hourglass actually

[prosebushpatch]

Gravity falls premiered in 2012!

Omg, good to know!!! XD still 8 years?! Oof that seems so long ago but the show does not feel that old. Wild.

[bae-leth]

FE3H x LoZ Part 2

Hi again! It’s been a while but here are some things I’ve come up with since the last post I sent. I hope you enjoy!

THE CHURCH OF HYLIA

I’m still debating upon whethere there will be a fourth route that focuses on the Church of Hylia, so I won’t touch upon the leader of the Church yet (but if anyone has any ideas, please feel free to bring them up!) The following characters are faculty and staff at the Officer’s Academy, and they are all recruitable.

Byleth - So it’s come to my attention that a huge part of the narrative in Three Houses comes from Byleth. Therefore, I’m going to include Byleth in this AU! It feels kind of wrong especially since this blog has given them so much characterization that I feel they without a doubt belong to Three Houses, but the story needs something to drive it forward (one example being Byleth has to choose a house). Unlike Three Houses, however, there won’t be a super big focus on their origins. Sothis isn’t in this AU, after all, so Byleth will just be a normal mercenary who becomes the new professor by chance. I suppose you could say that Byleth is much more of a Mark than a Corrin here in terms of involvement, though they still can have supports with the other characters. Also, they have pointy ears to match everyone else.

Jeralt - Good news: Jeralt is alive for the story this time! Throughout the story he acts as a source of wisdom for Byleth, and eventually gets closer to the house leader and does that for them, too.

Telma - a healer from Hyrule who serves as a professor and the school physician. She really wants a man, and almost always has some kind of dating problems. However, she is very motherly and excellent at her job. Her favorite hobby is making cocktails (which help her drink her worries away) but she doesn’t make any for the students until post-timeskip. Strengths: Faith, Riding, Authority

Kass - he was a traveling bard in his youth but eventually became a full-time professor. He is known for giving profound yet mysterious advice. He has taken Medli under his wing (pun intended) as a musical apprentice. Strengths: Axe, Flying

Robbie - the training instructor at the Officer’s Academy. Known for his flashy battle moves. He has an interest in tinkering and mechanical work. Possesses close ties to the royal family of Hyrule. Strengths: Sword, Lance, Axe

Orca - a general in the Knights of Hylia. One of the oldest knights. He is strict and has a commanding presence over the other knights, and has risen to his position because of his renowned strategic prowess. Strengths: Sword, Lance, Authority

Linebeck - a rather lazy soldier in the Knights of Hylia. He is often being lectured by  for his lack of effort. Has a habit of taking credit for achievements that he didn’t contribute to. Strengths: Sword, Brawl, Heavy Armor

Osfala - a former scholar who is now a field physician in the Knights of Hylia. He is a graduate of the Officer’s Academy. Quite prickly, but very attentive and quick-minded on the battlefield. Strengths: Bow, Faith

Irene - a mage in the Knights of Hylia. She is a graduate of the Officer’s Academy. She is not devout to the Church of Hylia, but she took the job in order to help those in need (though she would never admit it). Strengths: Reason, Flying

Makar - a noble child born out of an affair and taken in as a servant of the Church. He can often be found tending to the greenhouse, his favorite place in the monastery. Somewhat absentminded, but always wants to do his best. Strengths: Lance, Faith, Flying

ROUTES

Before we begin, I’d like to announce that the name of the monastery is the Great Plateau Monastery! It’s named after the plateau it sits on, which is in the center of the continent. Its high cliffs act as a natural barrier against any skirmishes that happen on the borders of the nations.

This is mostly just a general summary of each route rather than going chapter by chapter.

Part 1: Clear Skies

Jeralt and Byleth save three children (Link, Zelda, and Ganondorf) from a bandit attack.

Linebeck arrives on the scene and thanks the mercenaries for their work… because he didn’t have to do anything!

It is revealed that Link, Zelda, and Ganondorf are students at the Officer’s Academy and heirs to their respective nations. Linebeck escorts them, as well as Byleth and Jeralt, back to the Great Plateau Monastery.

The mercenaries are recommended to the Church of Hylia: Jeralt as a Knight and Byleth as a professor. Byleth meets the students and selects a house to teach.

Byleth leads their house on various mock battles and real missions, while also using their status as professor to teach and train their students. The students also bond with one another, even mingling with the other houses – the three house leaders are notably close.

During one mission, Byleth and the students are tasked with protecting the monastery from an army led by an assassin known as Sheik. It is at this point where they begin to suspect that there is a bigger conspiracy at work.

Zelda later reveals that Sheik is a phantom that she controls in order to collect information and lead assaults while maintaining her identity as a student. She accuses the Church of hiding the truth from the world, and before she can elaborate, she escapes.

If Byleth has chosen the Azure Owls, they follow Zelda and she explains that there is a prophecy that has been erased from history by the Church, in which the three nations are caught in an eternal cycle of war and hatred over the Triforce Crests. She has learned that Ganondorf, as the bearer of the Crest of Demise, will wage war that will destroy the continent in the future, and she intends to stop that from happening as soon as possible.

If Byleth has chosen the Azure Owls, they join Zelda and siege the Great Plateau Monastery in order to make it a new base of operations for the Kingdom army. If Byleth has chosen the Crimson Boars or Verdant Wolves, they join their students and the Knights of Hylia in defending the monastery.

Regardless of which house they chose, Byleth is knocked unconscious during the battle, and wakes up five years later. The Kingdom, Empire and Alliance are at war with each other, just as the prophecy stated.

Part 2: Relentless Rain (Azure Owls / Kingdom of Hyrule)

Byleth returns to the monastery, where they reunite with Zelda and the Azure Owls. They learn that the Gerudo Empire has allied with the Church of Hylia – though they have different goals, they both oppose the Kingdom – while the Ordon Alliance remains neutral, but is struggling to prevent internal conflict.

The Gerudo Empire invades Kingdom territory, but to everyone’s surprise the Alliance arrives as well, resulting in a three-way battle. There are heavy losses on all sides, with the Alliance army especially damaged.

Zelda’s first plan of action is to eliminate the Alliance while it is still vulnerable. The Kingdom army storms the Alliance capital and though Link is there as the last line of defense, he surrenders upon defeat.

The Kingdom army continues to advance into Empire territory. The Knights of Hylia guard a vital fortress in one last stand, but are defeated.

Zelda and Byleth arrange a secret meeting with Ganondorf in hopes of obtaining more answers about the prophecy, which Ganondorf has learned about in the past five years. When they confront him, they see how much his mind has deteriorated, and they are ambushed by soldiers of the Yiga Clan. Zelda and Byleth are forced to retreat.

Zelda admits that she had worked with the Yiga Clan as Sheik in the past, partially to obtain information about the resurrection of the Demon King and partially to gain their aid in taking down the Church. However, since their goal is to unleash the Demon King, she plans to target them as well.

The Kingdom army arrives at the capital and sieges the imperial palace. Ganondorf has fully lost his sanity and exhausts all of his troops in order to try and overwhelm Zelda. He is defeated, but in a last-ditch effort he uses his Crest in order to transform into a Demonic Beast, Beast Ganon.

Zelda and Byleth defeat Beast Ganon. Zelda briefly mourns that of all people, the Crest of Demise happened to take hold of her friend. However, she is reassured that she has restored peace to the continent. Link steps down from leadership of the Alliance and becomes a lone traveler. The three nations unify into the Great Kingdom of Hyrule, and Zelda ascends as its first queen. She heralds an era of peace and harmony while turning her attention to tracking down the remains of the Yiga Clan.

Part 2: Roaring Thunder (Crimson Boars / Gerudo Empire)

Byleth returns to the fallen Great Plateau Monastery and encounters Ganondorf, who is continuing to grow unstable. He laments that he hears voices and has visions urging him down the path of evil. The two reunite with the rest of the Crimson Boars and claim the monastery as their base.

Ganondorf forces a sudden battle between the armies of the Empire, Kingdom, and Alliance. All three armies are hit extremely hard.

Link arrives at the monastery alone to talk to Ganondorf as a friend rather than an opponent. He urges Ganondorf to stop the war with him so they can live in peace as they did before. In a fit of blind rage, Ganondorf loses control of his own actions and murders Link.

Ganondorf realizes that he needs to locate the source of the darkness within him before he can cause any more damage. However, he must convince Zelda to stop the war, so the imperial army continues its advance into Kingdom territory.

The rest of the Verdant Wolves lead the Alliance army into battle, desiring vengeance for the murder of their friend and leader. Ganondorf is forced to defeat them in order to advance.

The imperial army arrives at the Kingdom capital, where Zelda faces them in one final stand. She refuses to yield, as she believes that her mission to eliminate Ganondorf is the only way to prevent further conflict. Ganondorf regretfully defeats her, and in her dying breath she says to “beware the eye of the Yiga.”

Byleth and Ganondorf obtain a posthumous letter from Impa, which details all of the information Zelda has collected about the reincarnation cycle, and Ganondorf learns of his true nature as the reborn Demise, the Demon King of ancient history. The Yiga Clan are a cult that seeks to revive Demise and bring forth the apocalypse, and the letter includes directions to their hidden base.

The imperial army storms the Yiga Clan Hideout, but in the chaos Ganondorf is restrained by the Yiga. They use their powers to extract the Crest of Demise from his body, and from the Crest’s power Demise is fully revived.

Byleth and Ganondorf engage in one final battle against the origin of evil itself, the Demon King Demise. Upon defeating him, the curse is broken permanently and Ganondorf is freed from its hold.

Ganondorf takes his rightful place as the King of the Gerudo Empire, and eventually repairs relations with the Kingdom and Alliance. He visits the Great Plateau Monastery, where Link is buried, the day before his coronation, and says a prayer for all of his friends who had fallen in the war. He is renowned centuries into the future as the catalyst who laid the continent’s demons to eternal rest.

Part 2: Shining Sun (Verdant Wolves / Ordon Alliance)

Byleth returns to the Great Plateau Monastery and reunites with Link, who has been hopeful for their return. Together they meet up with the other Verdant Wolves and rally their troops at the monastery, which has become their new base.

SIDE NOTE: in this route, Link has the option to recruit any units who were not recruited in part 1 if he approaches them in battle.

The Alliance army advances into the Kingdom, but are stopped by the Zelda and the Kingdom army. Ganondorf and his troops also arrive, resulting in a three-way battle. All three armies are forced to fall back, and Link decides to travel along the border between the Empire and Kingdom in order to avoid more ambushes.

Link confesses that as a commoner who ascended to leadership, he has always been treated as an outsider. His dream is to rebuild the continent into a place where everyone is treated equally, and where the bigotry and discrimination between social classes and nations is abolished. This is why his goal is to end the war in its entirety and unite all three nations.

The Alliance army is attacked by the Yiga Clan, which is when Byleth and Link first learn of the cult’s existence.

Before departing from the border and heading into Kingdom territory, the Alliance army faces Ganondorf and the imperial army one more time. Cia is particularly conflicted about her loyalties, and if Link recruits her during the battle, Ganondorf calls in reinforcements that surround them completely. Link is forced to defeat Ganondorf in order to proceed, and in Ganondorf’s last moments, Link promises to bring peace to the continent. (Though Link is not aware of the prophecy, he unknowingly fulfilled it by defeating Ganondorf.)

The Alliance battles its way through the Kingdom until it reaches the capital. Zelda refuses to hear Link’s pleas to cease the war, and the Kingdom engages the Alliance in battle. Midway through, she calls upon the Yiga Clan, and they arrive as reinforcements. Byleth and Link are able to endure and come out victorious, defeating both the Kingdom and the Yiga.

Zelda survives, but is exiled out of the continent. The three nations are united into the Hylian Alliance, and Link becomes its first ruler. Link is still upset over losing Zelda and Ganondorf, but makes sure to honor them by making his reign a just and noble one thats brings the Alliance into a golden age. He is remembered as a progressive leader who utilized his kindness and generosity in order to bring together people from all walks of life.

CRESTS

I’ve decided that Crests and Relics are also in this AU! Here are all of the ones that appear in this universe.

There are four crests that are not passed on by bloodline: the Triforce Crests (Din, Nayru, Farore) and the Crest of Demise. These are the oldest Crests; they can manifest in anyone regardless of status, but appear very rarely. The Triforce Crests are capable of manifesting in someone who already has another Crest, and they won’t have any negative effects, unlike what is shown in Three Houses. The Crest of Demise is a different story.

Din - one of the Triforce Crests, also known as the Crest of Power. Its Hero Relic is the Mirror Shield. Bearers: Ganondorf (minor)

Nayru - one of the Triforce Crests, also known as the Crest of Wisdom. Its Hero Relic is the Bow of Light. Bearers: Zelda (minor)

Farore - one of the Triforce Crests, also known as the Crest of Courage. Its Hero Relic is the Master Sword. Bearers: Link (major)

Demise - an ancient Crest named after the Demon King who bore it. Bearers of this Crest eventually lose their sanity and gain an unquenchable bloodlust. Its Hero Relic is the Demon Trident. Bearers: Ganondorf (major)

Hylia - a Crest that is usually found in members of the royal family of Hyrule. Its Hero Relic is the Goddess Sword. Bearers: Zelda (major), Fi (minor)

Nabooru - a Crest that comes from one of the first warrior heroes of the Gerudo Empire. Its Hero Relic is the Scimitar of the Seven. Bearers: Urbosa (minor)

Kakariko - a Crest that originates from Hyrule. Its Hero Relic is the Sahasrahla Staff. Bearers: Osfala (minor), Robbie (minor)

Holodrum - a Crest that originates from Gerudo. Its Hero Relic is the Golden Gauntlets. Bearers: Onox (minor)

Zora - a Crest that originates from Hyrule. Its Hero Relic is the Lightscale Trident. Bearers: Ruto (major), Mipha (minor)

Lokomo - a Crest that originates from Ordon. Its Hero Relic is the Light Force Gem. Bearers: Byrne (minor)

Goron - a Crest that originates from Hyrule. Its Hero Relic is the Boulder Breaker. Bearers: Daruk (minor)

Rito - a Crest that originates from Hyrule. Its Hero Relic is the Harpstring Axe. Bearers: Revali (minor), Medli (minor)

Kokiri - a Crest that originates from Ordon. Its Hero Relic is the Fairy Bow. Bearers: Saria (minor), Makar (minor)

Twili - known in Hyrule as the Interloper’s Crest. The first bearer of this Crest left the continent and founded the kingdom of Twili, and it is only found in members of the Twili royal family. Its Hero Relic is the Twilight Spear. Bearers: Midna (major)

NEW CLASSES

These are some classes that I would’ve liked to see in Three Houses, so I wrote them down because it makes sense for certain characters. Also, the house leaders have their own Lord classes.

Dark Flier - a wyvern rider who uses lances and reason. I imagine this to be Midna’s canon class.

Holy Flier - a pegasus rider who uses axes and faith. I imagine this to be Cia’s and Medli’s canon class.

Blade Scion - an infantry unit who uses swords, lances, and gauntlets. I imagine this to be Impa’s and Groose’s canon class.

Goddess Knight - a horse rider who uses bows and reason. This is Zelda’s advanced class.

Holy Queen - a horse rider who uses bows and reason. This is Zelda’s master class.

Radiant Knight - a horse rider who uses swords and faith. This is Link’s advanced class.

Legendary Hero - a horse rider who uses swords and faith. This is Link’s master class.

King of Thieves - an infantry unit who uses lances, gauntlets, and reason. This is Ganondorf’s advanced class.

Demon King - an infantry unit who uses lances, gauntlets, and reason. This is Ganondorf’s master class and Demise’s only class.

OTHER NOTES

I forgot to mention in my last post that Shad is also a Crest researcher, so he’s basically Linhardt but without the sleepy.

Pre-timeskip, Zelda has shorter (BotW2) hair, Link has a ponytail (BotW), and Ganondorf has short (OoT) hair. Post-timeskip, Zelda has long (BotW) hair, Link has short (TP) hair, and Ganondorf has long (HW) hair.

Zant is Midna’s adoptive brother, so he is from Twili, but not of royal heritage. He hates Midna because she is the true heir to the throne but seemingly takes it for granted and does not take her responsibilities seriously. Upon enrolling at the Officer’s Academy, both of them were members of the Crimson Boars, but Midna transferred to the Verdant Wolves after meeting and befriending Link prior to the events of the story.

The equivalent of the Death Knight is Cherry. Yes, Robbie’s ancient oven Cherry. She can create Ancient Arrows at will, so she’s basically the definition of a scary unit.

I’m in love with the Link’s Awakening remake and I wanted to include Marin in this AU somehow so, so badly, but she’s basically Malon + Medli, so it seems a bit redundant. Just know that I love Marin with my whole heart.

[ihaveabsolutelynoideas]

Wind headcanon time!

Wind, my little sailor boy. I’m sorry but I have committed the greatest sin of never playing any of your handheld games. These are all based on Windwaker and what google tells me about Phantom Hourglass and Spirit Tracks.

Wind was 10 years old when Aryll was kidnapped.

He gambles. A lot. He picked it up as a way to pass the time when he travels with Tetra and now it’s just kind of his go-to way of killing time. Always carries cards and dice.

He does curse but not excessively nor in proper company. He's pretty polite, actually. His grandma didn't raise a rude child!

His parents were treasure hunters. They would always leave Wind, and then later Aryll, with Grandma because they couldn't safely bring children with them. Then one day they left and never came back.

Wind isn't bothered by it, though. He never really knew them since they were always on the go and his Grandmother raised them well.

He's got the darkest skin and lightest hair among the other Links, all thanks to the sun.

He's got some bad scarring from the Helmaroc King picking him with his talons. They curve around his waist in a crescent shape.

He likes his island cabana but really only uses it for storage. The fact that there were redeads living under it kind of put him off from using it too often.

He always likes to bring back souvenirs for his Grandma. He brings things back for Aryll too but he knows that his little sister is going to go off and explore on her own one day when she's older; his grandma on the other hand is going to live out the rest of her days on Outset. She's not upset by it because she never had the urge to explore but Wind still likes to bring her things from far away because he thinks everyone should experience things beyond their own shores.

He's actually hoping that he can introduce her to Wolfie at some point.

Ever since Sky told them all that the Master Sword has a living spirit, Wind can't stop thinking about how he left her in the ocean. He wishes he had some way to get back down to her but none of his items are good for deep sea exploration. He tried to borrow Twilight's zora armor but it didn't fit him. He's thinking about asking Legend next time they're in his world just to see if the Vet has a ring for that.

He's actually quite well off. The Great Sea is full of underwater treasure and Wind is an expert at using his crane to snatch it up. He can rack up hundreds of rupees in a single day, to the amazement of the other Links.

He’s also the most likely to spend hundreds of rupees in a single day. He’s young, wealthy, and spent thousands of rupees decorating Windfall Island during his first quest: he’s not super responsible with money because it’s never been an issue. Now that he’s landlocked most of the time he’s learning to be more aware of where his money is going.

He's also an expert haggler thanks to the auction house.

He picked up cartography after this first quest just so that he wouldn’t have to rely on Fishmen to fill out a map. These days he is constantly mapping out the land when the group finds themselves in an unfamiliar Hyrule.

He has become Legends personal map dealer.

He helped rebuild Windfish Island so Jabun would stop living behind Outset Island and giving Wind a heart attack every time he went for a nice swim. As nice as Jabun is, the sight of a giant fish circling the island makes the locals nervous.

Timeline stuff! (Probs not super accurate because I had to google it but I’m one of those people obsessed with trying to slap the timeline together under what Jojo said was canon. Wind is from Spirit Tracks? Well then I guess I have to figure out how this tiny sailor boy built and populated a country in less than 2 years lol 🤡

If you think Spirit is a separate link you can ignore everything below.)

Wind is the link from Spirit Tracks.

The tracks and trains were on New Hyrule when he and Tetra found it. They were actually ancient before the land was drowned but when the King wished for a future they rose and were renewed.

It took Tetra and Wind about two months to figure out how to work the trains enough to use them, though there was still a lot about them that they didn’t know.

Cole the chancellor appeared when the first ship of travelers arrived. He claimed he was from the destroyed Greatfish Island and no one questioned it. He was actually the one to show Wind and Tetra how to properly use the trains. He claimed he was a quick study so Tetra put him in charge of watching over the renovations. His knowledge of the ancient machines should have tipped them off but the sea people were brain dead from weeks of trying to puzzle it out themselves.

Tetra quickly found out that she hated the trains and how they could only follow the rails. It went against her “forge her own path” mindset so she quickly abandoned being an engineer to stay as a captain and help people move to the new continent.

Wind, on the other hand, loves the trains! They’re super fast and he finds the sounds of the engines pleasing the the ears. He became an engineer and helped the new Hyrulians move supplies and build towns.

The people who live on New Hyrule are mostly carpenters and laborers. They volunteered to be the first to start restoring all the old towns that rose from the sea. Thankfully, the Triforce actually did quite a bit in restoration so they had a good foothold before they ever started rebuilding.

[phantomphangphucker]

Ectober Day 7: Hero - But It’s Not Funny

*a sequel to Realities Little Joke For Infinity* Highly recommend reading that first but it’s not exactly necessary.

Tony has a bad habit of adopting strays. Particularly the stupidly heroic kind that were too reckless and too selfless for their own good. So of course he wasn’t going to just ignore the random teen that literally saved the universe only to disappear into the future. Even if said teen was somewhat dead and the only hero left in a world and time that seriously needed more.

Tony grins as he finally gets the connection to work, making his face appear on the strange future teens laptop; or whatever tech people used in whatever time this kid’s in. Going a bit wide-eyed and wheezing when the first thing he sees is Phantom -in alien PJ’s, because of course the first thing he sees on the kid who showed up in a t-shirt and jeans to an active warzone is pjs- shrieking and jumping a foot off the ground while holding a full pot off coffee; which predictably sends the contents of said coffee pot flying into the air and splattering all over the teens face and floor.

Phantom looks to the screen slowly, with steaming coffee dripping off his chin, hair and eyelashes, “seriously?”.

At that Tony can’t help but bend over laughing. Straightening up and looking at the coffee pot, “what were you even doing walking around with a full coffee pot?”.

“Well I was going to drink it. But now it’s as empty as my wallet”, Phantom looks down at the pot and grumbles, “ya know what? Fuck it. I’m still gonna drink it”, then pointing his finger around and telekinetically making all the droplets of coffee on him and the floor float back into the pot.

Tony watches, a little disgusted, as the kid practically takes a full swing of the previously spilled coffee, shrugs, and sits down by his own screen; feet clearly pulled up onto the chair seat as well and coffee pot cradled between his knees and chest. Tony eyeballs the coffee pot, “you’re really going to drink that huh?”.

Phantom shrugs, “I know what’s on my floor”, looks down at the carpet and shrugs again while muttering, “a Zone damned biohazard of blood n’ ‘plasm that’s what. Oh!”, eyes widening a little, “and a sock with a questionable stain”, looking back to the screen, “‘s not like I can get sick anyway. I could drink this shit outta a radioactive waste barrel and be fine. Prob’ taste like shit tho”.

Tony wheezes both amused and pained, “please don’t kid”, that... that would definitely make him gag.

Phantom chuckles, “don’t intend to”.

The two sit in silence for a bit. Tony taking in the teens appearance. There’s hand-shaped bruising coating his neck, one of his fingers is clearly broken, and there’s a pencil-sized hole going clean through the other hands palm. Phantom doesn’t even seem to care about the state of his body, considering how relaxed he seems and the PJ’s. Plus, no way would Tony be carrying anything, including a full pot of coffee, with his hands in the state Phantom’s are.

Phantom yawns, Tony noticing that he’s missing more than a handful of teeth, before Phantom asks, “so...why’s the past tin can face-timing my laptop?”.

Tony puts on a smile, so it was a laptop. Neat. “future or not, I’ve adopted you as one of my brats. I remember you saying there wasn’t superheroes in your age”, waving his hand around, “no older generation to guide the newer. Well you're getting the older generation now”, shrugging and smiling more genuinely, “plus underroos won’t stop talking about you”. Understatement of the century, Peter was thrilled to meet another teen hero, and wouldn’t stop going on about what powers he might have or if he even has anyone to support him. The latter Tony cares about more.

Phantom wheezes, “whom the fuck is ‘underroos’?”, shaking his head, “so ya wanna be my mentor of sorts and help me blast my foes from the past?”.

Tony smirks and nods, this kid’s humour sure was something else, “exactly. And you met before, the kid? Peter?”. Sure it had been a few months but he couldn’t have seriously just forgotten?

Phantom tilts his head, “the red and blue teenager?”.

Tony grins, “you got it, kid”, eyeing the teen's hands again, “your hands gonna be fine?”.

Phantom waves one hand around, chugging more coffee, “eh don’t worry your metal ass about it. I heal like crazy”, stretching his feet out and resting them on the desk, “I’m just putting it off a while on my hands ‘cause the broken ribs and missing bits of spine are kinda more important ya know?”.

Tony rubs his temples, “Jesus Christ”, just how much damage can this teen sustain? That kind of injury should kill a person.

Phantom laughs, probably at Tony’s pained expression, “don’t worry about that either! Not like I can die twice! Haha!”.

Tony looks back to the screen at that, feeling a bit more serious, “yeah, Thanos said something like that. That you were dead but alive. And you confirmed it. What did he even mean?”.

Phantom purses his lips, “well I could explain but that also could mess with the time stream and could result in some weird immoral science crap”. Tony doesn’t get a chance to comment on that as Phantom turns his head to the side and whines exaggeratedly at the thin air, opening his mouth as wide as looks physically possible, maybe even past that, “tiiiiiiime dadddddddyyyyyyy, will this break the time stream? Your problem child has a proooooobleeeeeeem”.

Tony wheezes into his hands, “Christ”, and stares dumbfounded as a giant hourglass with purple sand comes out of nowhere and smacks the teen in the face, making Phantom fall out of the chair with a thud.

Phantom groans and begins laughing, righting himself and spinning the hourglass around, pointing the bottom of it at the screen, it reading ‘you’re fine’. Tony is so not reading into that, kid had someone like Strange in his corner. Phantom sits back down, lifting up the hourglass like it’s a weight, “Kay Kay Kay, so I’m a halfa right? Unique creature, that’s what I am. A fucked up little science project gone wrong, or right. Your choice. My folks screwed up in the lab and boom!”, he sticks his limbs out comically before righting himself and catching the coffee pot he effectively tossed in the air, “a whack-a-mole of electricity and a wormhole decided to stop my tiny little heart. Also restarted it too though! So it’s cool”, tilting his head, “wait... didn’t I already explain this?”.

Tony sighs, “sort of. We were in the middle of a war”.

Phantom quirks an eyebrow, “your point? That was, like, the bloody third one I’ve been in”, rolling his hand around, “first there was the High Ghost King, his fifty-thousand odd skeletons, and objects of near-unlimited power. The alternate future where an evil me single-handedly annihilated humanity, talk about traumatising having to fight yourself literally”, tilting his head, “and no clue if the plant guy with his army of mind-controlled people and plants or the sleep guy with his army of Walkers, counted as ‘wars’. And eh!”, snapping his fingers, “there was that guy I stole the Reality Gauntlet from! He took over the planet and turned people into clowns and shit. So that might be big enough to count as a war, even if it was just him versus me. But then the tornado guy caused storms all over the planet too so would that count then too?”, shrugging, “eh whatever. I’m sticking with three. Pariah would have eventually destroyed the Zone, which woulda ended the universe. Dan was actively on his way to ending all life in the universe, probably all death too. And grape guy, Thanos, was about to annihilate half the life in the universe which honestly would just end all life eventually... maybe”.

Tony stares at the kid before wheezing some more and falling backwards, “Christ”, righting himself and his chair, “there is something seriously wrong with your life. Like, seriously wrong”. Apparently the future was a freaking mess and fixing its crap was all on one random teen's shoulders. All because the kid died, which somehow gave him superpowers, and decided to make something good out of that death. Talk about unfair. And messed up. Really messed up. At least Tony had his team and they had each other, “please tell me you have some kind of support?”.

Phantom grins and nods eagerly, “got my guy in the chair techy, he destroyed a sataliget once! My rich activist goth, she sued one of my enemies into oblivion. And a ghost hunter who only sometimes tries to murder me and got a nanobot supersuit running through her veins; she can lowkey kick my ass if I hold back enough to avoid accidentally killing the living”, wagging his finger at the screen and getting really close, “us dead fucks are borderline indestructible immortals, halfas even more so”, leaning back and shrugging, “can still die, or fade it’s called for the spookies, though. Well, most can anyway. Timedaddy’s straight-up immortal. But if they died then, well, then the universe would literally implode from the time-stream collapsing”, and makes a little explosion sound and motion with his hands. Oh fuck, the kid was really just a damn kid. And from the sounds of it, his entire support was three teenagers. Ah Hell. Oh and some time being, ghost?, that just left him to his own devices.

Tony shakes his head, “you know what? That doesn’t actually make me feel any better”.

Phantom shrugs, drinks, swishes the coffee around, “don’t know what to tell you, man, my entire existence is pretty fucked up. My archenemy is my uncle, wants to adopt me, and gave me his inheritance. My girlfriend has a solid murder boner for me. My parents get giddy at the idea of dissecting me and are actually worse about that the odd time they’ve been successful. The kids’ at school think I’m their personal punching bag. The government would love to shoot me full of missiles and bombs. Pretty sure my sis is just using me for her research paper on ghost psychology or whatever. And my friendships are pretty much based on the three of us just being really weird”.

Tony groans, this kid probably needed more help and support that literally any other teen or hero. “ClockPops is great though. We play chess”,

Tony blinks, mentally pausing, “you... play chess? Seriously?”, this kid seemed to have more issues sitting still than Peter did. Tony finds it hard to believe he can sit through even half a game of chess.

Phantom nods and grins, “yup. Switched the pieces out for shot-glasses once, it was great. One of my teachers is cool too. He crossdressed and pretended to be his own sister to get me to try harder on a test; it worked better than it had any right to”.

Tony blinks and breathes, “your life”, shaking his head because it sounded like the future was just pure insanity, “well now I’m here and while I’m a bit reckless and a recovering alcoholic, I’m not insane”.

Phantom chuckles, “I’ll probably prove to be a bit much for you then. I’d have to be stupid to not think I’m not at least marginally nuts. Nowhere near frootloopy but eh”.

Tony sighs, being self-aware enough -or just not giving enough of a damn- to recognise that was both impressive and depressing. Impressively depressing. “A few of us Avengers are trained doctors and psychologists outside of being experienced heroes. So kid? You’ve got all of us. At least for verbal advice. Strange already went and basically confirmed that paying you a visit wasn’t a smart idea”.

Phantom snorts and rolls his eyes, sipping a bit more before staring down the pot at the small amount left. Speaking into the pot, “oh yeah, I can just imagine all the time problems that could cause. I’m surprised this is okay”.

Tony can’t help chuckling at the slightly silly image, though he’s not sure why the kid doesn’t just drink what’s left, savouring it maybe? “Same. Strange looked at me like he was questioning my sanity. He’s probably going to pester you about the Clock guy you keep mentioning”, grumbling to the side, “I just hope Loki will keep his trickster mitts off you”. Because fuck, they’d probably get on like fire and more fire. Which yeah, slightly horrifying mental image. Probably inevitable though. Loki was already impressed, amused, and interested by Phantom and literally everything the teen did after showing up. Seriously though, who’s first thought when fighting giant spaceships with mouths and other horrifying shit, is to turn it into bouncy balls and worms??? And a smoothie for a reward? For effectively saving the universe? Kid was a trickster, dabbled in death kind of literally, and ‘gave precisely zero fucks’. Loki would have a field day and probably be a horrid influence. Though thinking of it, Phantom might be a bad influence on Loki. Loki generally had reasons for anything beyond mild messing with people. Phantom seemed more likely to just go buck wild purely because he could. Even if he seemingly had a heart of gold and more self-sacrificial bones in his body than actual bones. Seemed like his entire world/time belittled and beat the shit out of him, and yet he gladly got dissected and lost chunks of his freaking spine for them. At least he had the power to back it up.

Tony quirks an eyebrow at mist, or something, leaving the kid’s mouth before Phantom goes wide-eyed and Tony jerks as an actual literal swear-on-every-ironsuit-and-the-entire-tower cartoonish rocket smashes apart what he’s assuming is-was a window; sending glass flying everywhere... and Phantom flying off-screen, the coffee pot going up in the air and sounding like it smashed apart on the ground.

Tony can practically hear the glare in Phantom’s voice, “hey! You spilled my damn coffee!”, while a robot blasts into the room, breaking more glass and bits of wood from the looks of it.

The robot pauses, seems to frown apologetically before shrugging, “apologies whelp, but it is no matter! You won’t need such things after I skin you!“. Tony chokes and gags a little at that. “Also-”, pointing to where Phantom probably is, “-that was practically empty”. Tony then stares as Phantom comes back in screen -looking all black and white- only for the robot to shoot a missile at him immediately, Phantom just sort of shrugs and lets the missile hit him in the face. This kid seriously really didn’t give a damn about his own well being.

And not even seconds later Peter walks in out of the blue, face lighting up as he notices the screen and probably Phantom’s very noticeable self on it, and dashes over. Obviously noticing Phantom’s current situation, “oh Phantom! Kick his butt!”.

Phantom does a silly thumbs up at the screen and immediately gets stabbed in the shoulder. Tony watches in slight disbelief at the kid looking at the knife, saying, “oh! You got a new knife! Shit is the handle engraved?!?”. And the robot actually stops and replies with a wide grin, “it was a valentines gift from Ember! Impressive right?”.

Tony and Peter both blink at the fight effectively stopping as Phantom pulls out the knife and looks it over, seeming impressed, “actually yeah”, pointing almost aggressively at the robot, “you got her something too right? You’re fucking horrible for that man”.

The robot rolls Its eyes, how metal is moving that organically Tony has no clue. “Of course whelp, those drum sticks you can sing into”. Phantom facepalms and Peter actually shakes his head in disappointment. Though Tony agrees, that was awful. But who talks with their enemy -who wants to skin them for peat's sake!- about presents?

Phantom makes a tsk tsk sound, “you dumbass, she got you a sick-ass knife and you got her a knick-knack? Seriously?”, Phantom walks off-screen, the two watching as what they’re assuming is cash flys over to the robot and Phantom returns on screen, “go by some flowers to make up for that crappy present. And for the love of everything, don’t get roses”, waving his hand around, “that’s so cliche. Go with tulips and forget-me-nots”.

The robot inspects the cash before flying off-screen, presumably back out through the window It destroyed, “I will have your pelt next time, whelp!”.

Phantom chuckles, shouting back, “sure you will, Skulkie! Ghost Zones greatest hunter”. Tony and Peter can feel the sarcasm in that. “Also! No you don’t have to ask! An engraved knife would be a wicked Christmas Truce present!”. Tony sighs when a ball or something slams into Phantom’s stomach and sends him flying off-screen.

Peter leaning towards the camera, “woah! You okay?”.

Phantom’s laughter echoes horribly, “right as rain! Mind you, it’s not actually raining”, righting himself and pulling himself up into the previously knocked over chair, “don't mind Skulker, he’s a poacher and I’m rare. Practically one of a kind actually. A poachers dream prize. His girlfriend has a mind-controlling guitar and occasionally attempts at world domination”. A ghost-shaped guitar floats on-screen, Phantom grabbing it, “she gives awesome presents though”, and gives the guitar a good couple strums.

Peter’s eyes go wide, “you can play the guitar?!?”, tilting his head and asking what is in Tony’s opinion a more important question, “wait, your enemies buy you presents?”, tilting his head back, “oh man that’s awesome”. Tony just shakes his head with a smile, teenagers.

Phantom grins and strums some more before the guitar floats off-screen, “all my enemies do”, shrugging, “for the Christmas Truce and my death-day anyway. But that’s normal. A ghost culture thing. Even the prison warden guy, whose got special torture weapons set aside just for little ol’ me, buys me some kind of present. Heck! Even the eyeballs do! And they’ve repeatedly tried to assassinate me”.

Tony blinks, “kid, that makes no sense. But I’m glad they’re at least occasionally nice to you”. Hell knows Phantom needs someone to be nice to him.

Peter tilts his head, “what even is a ‘death-day’? Sounds dark”.

“Oh nothing special, just the day I died. Like a birthday! But for death! A real dead-ringer of a holiday!”, and laughs loudly before rolling his eyes at Tony, waving his hand around, “eh, I’m kinda their king so be kinda a dick move to not give me gifts on literally the two biggest holidays”.

Peter practically shrieks, “WHAT! You’re a king! Oh that is so cool”. Tony blinks, “you did mention something about being the guardian of death and Earth”.

Phantom laughs some more and finger-guns while winking at Peter, “yup! Very important, much power”, and grins stupidly before pointing to the air above his head; a green floating crown bursting to ‘life’ with green mist or something wafting off, followed by a black cape with a flaming white collar and large flaming green skulls pinning it closed with a shadowy chain.

Peter cheers immediately, then adding, “Loki would love this!”. Tony points at him, “no. I want to keep that one as far away as possible for as long as possible”.

Phantom snickers, “I have chronic bad luck, so don’t count on that working out for you. Spidey probably has better tastes than you though, Ironass”.

Tony shakes his head with a smile, “you like making up names for people huh?”.

Phantom grins meanly, “it pisses people off. Which makes them easier to hit”, and holds up a fist, smacking a hand on his bicep.

Tony can’t help but laugh at that, “you got a point kid!”, though that was stupid reckless, and effectively confirmed him being tricky. One of Tony’s tech toys starts beeping so she moves to check it out. Peter taking his place in the chair. Glancing back at Tony before looking back to the screen, “hey I’ve got a question, teen to teen. What’s being a hero to you? Why do you do it? It just... it seems like your only suffering for it. Waaaaay more than normal. And not making stuff much better for it”.

Phantom hums, spinning around in the chair, “a hero's not afraid to give their life, and anything worth doing is worth getting hurt for. I do it so others will not suffer. That is all. It doesn’t matter if things change or not. If there’s still unnecessary violence and pain, then it is still a hero's place to grab their fists around it and pulverise it to Hell and back. So long as cruelty exists I will be there to stand against it. With a smile on my face and a laugh in my heart and Core. Because there is no greater joy, no greater choice, no greater path, than self-sacrifice for the sake of another. Regardless who they are, what they are. Good or bad. Young or old. And whether they support you, or not”, Phantom nods, puts his hands behind his head, cape bunching up, and looks to the side, “and maybe someday things will change. I doubt it, but who knows. But if things do, if that kind of future is on the horizon, then I think I’ll rest. Until then, I’ll be here. Doing what I do and suffering immeasurably for it. Until the world doesn’t need ‘heroes’ anymore. Till it doesn’t need me anymore”, looking back at the screen, Tony having walked back over slowly though the kid doesn’t pay him any mind, “so I guess, being a hero to me is being the embodiment of a brighter future. To absorb the suffering of the world”, sticking a finger up, “like a paper towel!”. Tony chokes at that a little; though the kids' sudden seriousness and introspection was just as startling as last time.

Tony shakes his head, “you make it sound like you’re immortal, kid. Also, that’s what a team’s for, to help share the load. The burden. Sure your ideals are noble and probably needed, but you can’t help anyone if you destroy yourself”.

Phantom smiles but something about it seems almost... sad. “In a way, I am. A ghost can not die and a human can not fade. A ghost ceases to exist when they fade and a human when they die. Yet I can do neither. So that raises the question, what is ‘death’ for a halfa? An idea? An ideal? A reality? Or just pointless conjecture. And besides, for a ghost to fade they must satiate their Obsession. Be satisfied with the fulfilment of their existence”, pointing to his chest, “and my Obsession? Protection. To protect is a physical and mental need for me. And it will never be satisfied till there’s nothing left needing protection. And it is thus that I will always be here”, shrugging and chuckling, “likely anyway”.

Tony blinks, that... that changed a lot actually. It also explained a lot. This wasn’t some kid playing hero, or even an experienced hero just doing what’s right and their job. This wasn’t someone stuck in a bad way and doing what needed to be done purely because no one else could. This wasn’t someone trying to do good to make up for their sorted past. This was someone wise beyond their years, with little to no regard for themselves, and a living -half-living- embodiment of the word ‘hero’. Watching the teen turn his head at someone -likely his mom- shouting that supper was ready. There was a rocket-powered fistfight minutes ago and his parents’ didn’t even check on him. Christ that was depressing. But it also made him want to help this kid out all the more.

Phantom turns back to the screen, “whelp that’s my queue then I guess. And let me guess? This-” gesturing at the screen, “-is gonna become a thing? Which totally cool, little warning next time. And keep this mind, walking the straight and narrow takes more time than I got. I will steal, mildly harm, trick, and lie, as I see fit”.

Tony rolls his eyes, he’d expect no different from a kid basically left up to their own devices, “we’re all guilty of that, kid”. Phantom just laughs as the screen goes dark.

Tony leans back, well fuck, he wasn’t prepared for the kid to have shit that bad. And the King situation definitely threw him through a loop. He’ll have to talk to Thor -not Loki, dear God not Loki- about that. Being a hero and a king.

Regardless, they’re gonna help the weird spooky future kid out. And Peter absolutely liked Phantom, which hopefully wouldn’t be a bad thing. Hopefully. (And it wasn’t, if you ignored Peter carrying out more than a few pranks on Phantom’s behalf).

End.

[intrepids-stuff]

Ok, so over the weekend, I decided to try and make a Legend of Zelda outfit for Owl and I don’t think I did it but these two new outfits came out of it. I wanted to base him more on the styles of Twilight Princess & Breath of the Wild, but I think I pulled from some of the others too.

The bottom one seems to have a more celestial design to him so that might actually be an outfit for after he’s accepted his heritage as a deity reincarnated. I dunno though. Maybe it was just a 1′st draft warm up??? I like the intricate design I did for his mask and tunic+tassels though. Especially how his design seems to mimic star constellations. Maybe he’s a priest (or acting priest) of some kind in this outfit? Idk. he definitely seems more open to helping folks who ask him for help than the one in the top design. 

I’m really pleased with the top design though. It definitely keeps in line with Owl’s barn-owl mask aesthetic without being too plain.The designs definitely have a more wind-waker/phantom hourglass look to it, (which style I think is really charming I love it) but it maintains the kind of seriousness that Ocarina of Time had. Looking at it, I think Owl would make a great Twilight Realm resident. He’d probs be as much of a brusk hermit there as he is in his own world.

Hmmmmm. Thinking about it, the top one seems to be when he’s still seeing himself as a normal person (instead of the reincarnation he is) and the bottom seems to be him after he’s accepted himself past & present and the powers + responsibilities.

Looking at both things though, Owl looks like he would make a REALLY cool Twili. (also, the top outfit seems to be a “so dun with your bullsht” battle outfit while the other is a more ornamental non-battle outfit. Probs could do some nice healing too.)

Hmmm maybe the top is his mask of war (which presents a stern emotionless expression) and the bottom is his mask of peace/enlightenment (which presents a more mystical/contemplative expression).