#proud of myself for figuring out a way to get the lighting effect i wanted with low effort cause erm im sleepy

[transguygardner]

GuyLobo Week 2024: Day 1 - AU

earth 13 pov: you're about to get fucked up by the annoying mage of the starheart and that demon he summoned

[mysteryanimator]

Here ye here ye, another breaking down processes post from yours truly!

For this animation, my plan was to make something I'm proud of AND also something to force me to take my time since with all previous animation works they were all rushed. I normally tend to speed through work as someone whose illustrations are painterly and I like to keep them rough. Also lets be totally honest my other plan for this animation was to animate Mizrox being so sickeningly sweet.

Fun fact, this animation was going to be longer. I had tried to plan out Olrox climbing on top of Mizrak during the kiss to lay on his chest. There was an attempt trying to rough that out and several ref videos It was scrapped because for the life of me I could not figure it out. Also hypothetically if I was going to keep it, I would cut to another angle (perhaps Mizrak's face close up) and then cut to another angle that would make it easier to see that climbing over the top. OR, consider Olrox already sleeping on his chest (im just rambling now but this is basically 'if you were able to do this again' section).

I wish I actually went through a more proper tie-down process because the jump from going from my rough straight to clean was rough (badum tsk) for the first few seconds. Defintely learnt my lesson ALSO Olrox is surprisingly really fun to draw from behind.

I challenged myself to see if I could get the idea of "bigger movements, less in-betweens, smaller/slower movements, more in-betweens." Though the effect of Olrox rubbing his face against his arm may be a little too jarring and I steered quite a bit away from my rough and self-reference video in hopes of making the face rubbing more apparent because I thought the character acting was too subtle and wanted a contrast to the other half of the scene. I reconfigured my CSP animation workspace for this too so it definitely made the process less tedious when cleaning up the animation.

(Which by the way I do record a lot of self-references depending on the section! For things I can't do/uncomfortable doing, I'll end up looking up videos. It's the easiest for me to catch subtle things in body language and also get a feels for the motion.)

Also I'm really satisfied with Olrox's anticipation before his smooch and the shoulder roll at the end even though technically the arc doesn't complete itself. MIZRAK THOUGH, when cleaning up I realised my rough wouldn't make sense because he's already looking at him so there's no need for a turn, and then the lack of a shoulder movement felt jarring, so all of that was done without any thought, wish I did think about it more though.

Now compositing was a monster in its own right and basically me jumping back and forth between turning on and off different layers, but here are all the new things I did; I duplicated and blurred the lines of the lineart, beveled the shadows so it was lighter on the inside, and added a rim of blur so the focus drew towards the couple. Also will absolutely admit that my fanboy ass went "... be crazy and try to mimic the show." The final did not go that route because I thought it was more important to emphasize the mood/atmosphere (Also Olrox is intentionally stylized differently because i wanted him to be softer here and I had to give him eye highlights for plot HELP). THOUGH to say I did not try to mimic the style, the #2 lighting test was my 'attempt' LOL 😭 I can never consume media normally.

Here are the lighting tests I went through. I definitely knew I wanted to go with a morning vibe, though I tested out a night ver for fun and did some edge lighting which led to mixing both version #2 and #3 to make #4.

Fun fact, I almost went with #2 due to fear of getting too heavy-handed with compositing and therefore losing the animation (even though I really liked #4 at the time). Thanks to a friend, they also shared the sentiment of liking #4, though pointed out it felt like midday and encouraged me to make the colours warmer and deepen the shadows. It is a really tough balance but I think for a softer scene like this, the more additional layers of comp worked out in the end.

The edge light was a last minute thing because someone told me to add sound and to have light stream in. Also at this point I deadass forgot that you know, Olrox, is a vampire, but hey rule of cute overrules. We can pretend its light not from the sun LOL

Also yay I got to show off my own style a tad, I love paintingggg. It's not as completely fully rendered coz I knew that it would get covered up but I still made sure it was quite clean regardless. I didn't realise how much of it would be covered up even though I did make sure they would fit/make sense for bg LOL

Now we are done!

If you've gotten this far thank you! There's gonna be less frequency of these animations due to the semester starting back up soon and I don't get many opportunities to actually 2D animate (despite it being an animation degree RAH). Also I remembering cringing and laughing a lot when I immediately started putting colour down going "oh i can see the end of the horizon, i have too much power as an artist, people will see this i cant let them see me be crazy"

[Here's some memes I drew over while my friend was reviewing my work]

[mdhwrites]

Since you mentioned it in a recent post, what do you think about TOH having a sympathetic main cast of mostly conventionally beautiful, humanoid characters while still preaching about how 'weirdos have to stick together'? Do you think there's some hypocrisy in how the show handles its less 'cute' characters?

I do think it's hypocritical and that in and of itself is a problem. It's also just really fucking boring and contributes to the problem of it feeding into the fantasy problem of "Our world but with more teeth."

So since I'm going to rip into this creative choice for the rest of this blog, let's first talk about the positives of having a cast that is effectively all humans, especially all good looking ones, instead of demons, monsters, etc. After all, we need to be fair. There's a lot that goes behind these choices and while the Isles has a lot of bizarre designs in the backgrounds, there had to be a point to all of the denizens we commonly interact with looking like generic elves. *flips through notes* *checks some papers* *flips through more notes* It makes fanart easy.

...OKAY FINE! That's only SOMEWHAT hyperbolic. The reason it makes fanart easier is also why it's really easy to just go with a cast of humans. We as a SPECIES inherently trust and connect better with those who look like ourselves, for better and mostly worse. This can be as specific as skin color and as abstract as simply the human form. Yes, for people like me who are proud monster fuckers, this line blurs but for common Joe Shmoe, they're going to want someone who looks fairly normal if they're going to get really invested.

Worse yet is if you look at modern cartoons. Bare minimum, Molly McGee and Amphibia. Yes, SOME people in those fandoms will draw the frogs and Scratch... But they ALL draw the trios of human characters. And yes, shipping matters here but I've also seen a good number of Amphibia artists just admit to spending way too much figuring out how to draw Sprig because the anatomy is wonky enough to make you question yourself. If they're all humans, you can still get by just fine with your normal style and lessons that most art books are going to teach you.

This isn't even untrue from a writing perspective. Just a cultural shift (and yes I'm calling myself out on this) can be enough to throw you WAY out of your comfort zone for how to write a character besides token elements like food. Throw in entirely different anatomy, skill sets inherent to biology, weaknesses similarly inherent to that biology, and you start to have a lot more questions you need to ask for a very basic level understanding of a character. Which seems like a good transition point to talking about the monstrous denizens of TOH. Specifically that there is ONE 'monster' in The Owl House main cast and that is King.

...

Can you tell me what the fuck is special about King? Besides being short and fluffy, his differing anatomy effectively NEVER comes into play. His magical blasts are practically replicated by Raine whistling. Make him an 8 year old elf child and the only thing you lose is his ancestry. Not his heritage, his ANCESTRY. That's pretty fucking weak.

Edit: Someone on Twitter pointed out to me that King's design is effectively just a furred Cubone and I hate knowing this.

Otherwise, the only inhumane thing about him is that they make him a dog. Which, you know... isn't exactly going very far down on the spectrum of likability for most people. In fact, this technique isn't anywhere near new. Toothless is just a giant cat and I love him for it but I wouldn't blame anyone who looked at the How to Train Your Dragon Dragons and went "I wish they acted like dragons." Because... They don't? They have the designs and move sets of dragons but most of their temperament is far more cat like, down to having dragon nip and being distracted by reflected light.

King is also the only foreground deviation for the protagonists. As I said when I first mentioned this, you can't even really go with Willow being heavier set. She is pretty much the textbook definition of "More to love" seeing as her being slightly heavier just gives her a softer design than the rest of the characters instead of being anywhere close to unappealing like one of Mabel's friends in Gravity Falls is. You're supposed to look at Willow and go "I bet she gives really good hugs" and that's about it. Her weight, much like her ethnicity frankly, is hardly what you're supposed to think about with her design besides basic contrast.

And she's still better than the rest of the cast who are models. Including Luz for that matter. Now the show's style doesn't lend itself well to distinguishing how pretty a character is besides their reactions from a different character... But it can also absolutely do ugly. And no one in this main cast is ugly. You want a NASTY scar, you're gonna have to look elsewhere than the tatted up teenage boy and the girl who has a little flair on one of her eyebrows. One is meant to look cool, the other is still the same job while also being slight enough not to embellish the main face too much.

Amity and Eda though are explicitly in text stated as REALLY PRETTY. Like model pretty from how people react to them. Yes, one of these people is Luz's girlfriend but literally any acknowledgement of her looks is more than Gus, Willow or any of the villains (especially positively) are given. Not even Odalia who is the best case against this argument. But, you know, those are Amity's genes running through Odalia. She's not gonna be ugly because then how are all of the Blight Children ready for a Vogue cover shoot?

And here's the thing: In most media, this isn't really a problem. People like attractive people and there's nothing wrong with that. I know people want more representation and they are right to want that but also most media is a fantasy of some sort. Especially for a basic wish fulfillment isekai like TOH, a really pretty harem is packaged explicitly into the fantasy because who doesn't want hot magical beings saying they're the best?

Except then there's the line of "Us Weirdos Gotta Stick Together," or the fact that Luz is stated to be bullied (but didn't actually look out of place amongst the cheerleaders or drama kids), or the fact that TOH theoretically peddled early on a Fantasy vs. Reality theme. It is a show that is meant to CELEBRATE the Other and be challenging to those who are commonly seen as better... But the Other isn't present. When they are... They're villains. Belos is the only character with a curse that doesn't make them pretty. It's really gruesome what the curse does to him, even before he becomes a full monster. Contrast that with Eda who sprouts feathers and that's really it? Then you have Tibbles, who is a literal pig, the evil publisher who is a lizard, the monster hunters who are orcs effectively, Warden Wrath who is a homunculus? There isn't actually a clear inspiration directly for him besides 'monster' which is part of why he's one of the best one off villains of the series. The closest to a protagonist monster is Hooty which the series goes out of its way to make most people mock, outright hate and/or be actively repulsed by him, especially if it's a character we're supposed to care about.

When it comes to the villains, there are two who stand out as prettier than the rest and they both have direct connections to the main cast. In fact, to Amity. Odalia who I talked about earlier and Boscha. I guess Matt if you want to count him but as far as looking like a basic ass bitch goes, you don't get much more basic than Matt without bleaching his skin. Boscha on the other hand's prettiness is pretty much the best argument we had before she was given a half assed redemption that she was going to be redeemed. Why else make her so much prettier than everyone else? Unless it was just fueled by "She is going to be next to Amity a few times and a Blight wouldn't interact with anyone too... alternative." None of Amity's friends are more monstrous than a third eye after all and that doesn't really hold Boscha back all that much. Frankly, it probably saved her from large forehead jokes akin to what Amity gets since they both have hairstyles that pull their hair back and that's a problem for the show's style.

What does all of this mean? Well, it means in a show that is trying to lift up those who feel like they don't belong, it's still reinforcing standard beauty ideals of society. Worse yet, it just kind of discredits that Luz meets ANY outcast. I wouldn't have called my friends in High School ugly of course but were any of us ready for the runway? Of course not. We didn't take care of ourselves right for that or just didn't have the right genes for it.

Because let's face it: The eyeball head girl was NEVER going to be a main character. And that's... also really boring. The fact that witches are just elves but without any of the culture, long lifespans (as far as we know) etc. like that is also just really boring. And for a fantasy show, especially one that pitches in the first episode that ANY folk tale we have originated here, that's not good. Especially since even if they look like elves, you could have still at least TRIED to make them interesting with things like the bile sac but that's a throwaway joke to the writers. And the saddest thing is... If you're a person who LIKES weird characters, or actually embraces their weirdness and so doesn't need to be told they'll have a Victoria Secrets model as a wife... What is TOH gonna do for you? Or for anyone who doesn't want designs that are less interesting and less unique than even Danny Phantom's. And that's from fucking Butch Hartman who is not exactly known for being a top tier artist. Like SAM as a goth is more alternative (especially for when the show first aired) than fucking ANYONE in the main cast of TOH. And that show debuted ALMOST TWENTY YEARS AGO. And Valerie even had a similar bodytype to Willow but with WAY more personality!

Now I'm just thinking about all the shows I grew up with like Total Drama Island that had so much fun with even their pretty boy designs. That's frankly my biggest issue. The pretty problem in TOH IS bad thematically. Above all else though... it's just boring. Boring and lazy. How these characters look don't mean ANYTHING to them. It doesn't say much about them, the show or anything else.

They're pretty just because the creator probably likes making pretty people and I can usually support. I support Yoko Taro after all. But Yoko Taro makes people (or androids which are based off humans). This is fantasy. You can do whatever you want and the TOH crew couldn't be assed enough to even do a demon.

In a world called the DEMON REALM! I think at that point, you need to ask why the fuck they're bothering with it being a fantasy show in the first place, let alone one trying to pitch itself as anything other than basic wish fulfillment.

=======

I have a public Discord for any and all who want to join!

I also have an Amazon page for all of my original works in various forms of character focused romances from cute, teenage romance to erotica series of my past. I have an Ao3 for my fanfiction projects as well if that catches your fancy instead, If you want to hang out with me, I stream from time to time and love to chat with chat.

And finally a Twitter you can follow too!

[roundboard]

Brutal Orchestra Art Hitlist

Just a list talking about each of the characters that I’ll have to go through drawing in Brutal Orchestra. Will detail plans and thoughts on ones I haven’t done, and reflect on the ones I have :)

Nowak/Bosch

I’m coming for you (two)...

Boyle

Done! Clean and simple inclusion of lore elements with a more interesting pose than I normally go for, really happy with how this one came out!

Hans

Done and dusted, I really did try to see if I could include SOME element of her items and such, but no luck... it cluttered the drawing far too much and there were too many conflicting themes. I tried my best to just elevate a lot of the simpler elements of Hans, and used one of her main abilities as a base for the concept.

Also included the fact her arms look kind of like spindly nerves as that’s how they seemed to be imagined by a lot of the community in canon! I think I made her look really nice and I’m still happy with it.

Burnout

Finished :) Probably my rawest piece yet, mega happy with how visceral I depicted him, as he deserves to be!!

Fennec

Fairly happy with how he turned out! I was trying to vary my angles since I have a habit of drawing characters facing right so I wanted to make sure to introduce some variety to the portraits. Plus, it’ll look even nicer by the end when they’re all lined up next to each other. 

He definitely seems a lot more jungle-y than he would let on but... A lot of his abilities seemed that way so I couldn’t help it. Not like it’s a bad thing, green + blue is a pretty good colour combo

Anton

I was definitely happy with him for a first attempt at this project, especially with how I shaded the mask, but I’m almost definitely going to go back to redo him. In hindsight there isn’t enough Anton swagger going on (minus the finger guns) and I think some element of his rude/skittish/gamble-orientated nature has to be shown off somehow.

Splig

Possibly my strongest work concept wise so far, or it’s tied with Kleiver. I’m really proud of myself for composing it in a way that shows off the Tao symbol they have in one of their attacks, and also demonstrate their syringe attack. It all looks pretty fluid as well. 

Only nitpick I’d have with this one is that it’s much more rough and simple(?) compared to my other works. Though, to be fair, this piece was the shortest to draw out of everything so far (about 2 hours or so)

Pearl

donezo... massive maw angle was definitely a good idea

Thype

My second drawing. Still really happy with the more oil paint-like thing going on for him, but similar to Anton, I feel like I could've shown off more from their lore/attacks. 

I’m less likely to try and to a complete redo like I am for Anton on this one, but I may make some adjustments? We can call it a remaster. Remaster sounds good and professional (which I am)

Griffin

I think I stuffed in as much lore as I could in the drawing (minus the fire, but I feel it would’ve oversaturated it.) My progress on lighting and shadows seems to be improving a good amount!! Excited to translate this skill into future drawings

Arnold

went with a more abstract and rough approach to convey arnold having a bit of a breakdown.. I think it worked really well and definitely a style I’d like to experiment with more in the future

Dmitri

Finally done... mega happy with the fire effects and I’m glad I could up the quality of the background more than just a standard black one or textured one! 

Mung

Mung

LongLiver

Finally managed to unlock him, and despite my initial worry that I wouldn’t be able to do something that creative, I managed it! I’m starting to get more comfortable with simple concepts done with more artistic flair if I can’t figure out a way to include their lore or attacks too much within the drawing itself. I also think this drawing shows off a bit more of my Disco Elysium style roots :) very proud of it!

Clive

Resident badass completed!! There was a point where he looked super bland and his head look way too long (like an egg) so thank god for the glow that was added later on... and the shortening of the skull

Kleiver

Even with the limited colour palette, I’m super super super happy with this one. This piece could’ve been kind of boring with just Kleiver shushing but my inspiration basically screamed out of nowhere that I could have bloodied music trails emanating from the stain on his hammer... Head. It doesn’t really show off his attacks but it shows off his brutality and lore enough that I’m absolutely satisfied with how he turned out. I nailed that hand pretty well too.

Cranes

Incredibly with the more simple and clean approach I took!! my first time trying out rain and such so I was really satisfied with how it turned out

Agon

My spookiest work yet, probably... I still really like this one :) depicted his yelling the best way I knew how! Super abstract but fits him well

Rags

Really really happy with her, I think the shading and colours came out excellent. Managed to fit some good stuff about her concept and item wise as well :) I think my only gripe might be that it’s a little less coherent than it could’ve been, with some of the parts of the drawing being quite dark.

However, I’m still really happy with it!!

SmokeStacks

Did this because some guy on reddit asked for it really nicely, even though SmokeStacks wasn’t even on my radar at the time... But they seemed to like it! I did too. I was initially trying to position SmokeStacks like every other portrait up close, but I realized I really wanted to show off the smoke more than the stacks part so I went ham on making the smoke look spooky and ominous.

He’s meant to be sitting on a pile of trash which is kinda hard to tell but I’m pretty happy with this one too.

Leviat

I like how dynamic and “pop-y” I made this one :) experimented with a style I didn’t do too often and was worried about how I’d handle the mass of flesh/teeth and masks thing but it turned out really nice

Bimini

Put as much for the character as I could into it! I think probably the most “packed” in terms of references so far... I do wish I could’ve done something a bit more with the background though

Gospel

so spacey... so gospel... it’s perfect

Mordrake

Mega happy with this one concept and execution wise :) holds a special place in my heart!

[penspiration-writing]

Because I have no control over myself, here’s a small snippet that I’m really proud of so far.

This does take place some time after Chapter 13, so some information here hasn’t been fully explained. But I’ll be working on that later. I just felt that this scene would be perfect for spooky month.

The entire scene will be posted on Halloween!

-

Taking a breath to calm herself, Kasumi lifted her head to look around. At the far end of the vault, she could see the jewel regalia that they had been after. A single light shone down upon it, making the spotless emerald green surface shimmer. Kasumi could almost feel a calming, benevolent aura coming from the magical artifact. She gazed at it in awe, almost in a trance for a brief moment.

Then something dark and shadowy flew over her head. She stifled a cry of alarm and ducked, more focused on getting out of the way than seeing whatever it was.

And that was when she sensed another presence. She wasn’t alone.

Kasumi quickly lifted her head, just in time to see a familiar figure standing before the jewel. Quickly, she drew Winter’s Tempest from its sheath and pointed it. “You!”

He paused, as if surprised, and soon turned around. Once his blood-red eyes spotted her, a delighted, sinister grin spread across his face. 

“Kasumi! What a surprise.” The delight was evident in Toshiro’s tone. “I was getting so worried that this mission would be boring, but here you are! How nice of you to show up.”

Kasumi didn’t return the same smile. She simply tightened her grip on her sword’s hilt. “Step away from the Magatama.”

“And disappoint my mistress yet again?” His brows furrowed, yet the smile remained on his face. “Kasumi-chan, you know I can’t do that.”

Chan? Hearing that made Kasumi shiver uncomfortably. He was talking to her like she was a young, naïve child. She hoped Toshiro didn’t notice the effect his words had on her. She didn’t want to appear afraid in front of him. “We won’t let Prima take it for herself.”

“We?” Toshiro raised an eyebrow at her, and soon glanced around the vault. “As far as I can tell, none of your allies decided to follow you in here. Not even your dear sister. Poor Kasumi-chan, all alone.”

“Stop calling me that!” The outburst left her before she could stop herself.

“Would you prefer that I continue calling you half-breed?” He paused, before letting out a snicker. “Oh, but you don’t even know what you are, do you?”

[svankmajerbaby]

✨️🎀🎈💞💝🕯🎙🤲💌

!! thank u so much for the ask. i love talking about writing......

✨ What's a fic you've posted you wish you could breathe life into again and have people talking about it? (or simply a fic you wish got more credit)

-hmm theres a point in which i have to tell myself not to worry about likes or comments bc what really matters is me getting the practise and exercising my writing muscles and having fun with it... But. i do wish i could get more ppl into my toy story fic. its got a whole bunch of wonderful comments and kudos and stuff, i just feel so proud of it and writing it came so easy and i poured so much of my love into it, i really really wish anyone who loves these characters would read it too.

🎀 give yourself a compliment about your own writing

-english is not my first language so grammar isnt often The Best, but i take a lot of care with using words and expressions as correctly as possible, and I try to always spell words right (i dont think ive ever confused loose and lose, for example, which ive seen confused a few times). some descriptions of spaces are particularly well done, at least to my own criteria, and the song choices are fun (or at least fun to write and picture in my head).

🎈 describe your style as a writer; is it fixed? does it change?

- honestly, ive no idea. i think i get verbose, and i write long dialogue scenes. i overuse the — to lead into another thought, because thats kind of like how my mind works. i try to be "cinematic" in my writing and always start a scene with a description of a place, its lighting and its sounds, like im used to when writing scripts. and i got the sense that usually the characters often ramble and go on long discussions about stuff that maybe normal people wouldnt just start out discussing so strongly. but honestly id much rather someone else outside my own perspective told me what my writing is like, i would trust them more than my own opinion.

💞 what's the most important part of a story for you? the plot, the characters, the worldbuilding, the technical stuff (grammar etc), the figurative language

-the characters!! everything is important, and stuff like grammar often jumps out first for me... but i need to enjoy how the characters are written, and feel like theyre real people with genuine motivations and interactions. i dont mind too much if theyre not super alike to canon, as long as they feel true to the core of their personality and values.

💝 what is a fic that got a different response than you were expecting?

-i was surprised to even get comments on my barbie frankenstein one. i loved writing it and it came through so easily and comfortably, but even though i had used that moderately popular meme of reimagining barbie as a gothic protagonist as inspiration i didnt really think it would be anything but something i liked to picture existing. i was so happy to see people enjoyed it too.

🕯️(there are two questions with this candle emoji symbol? i chose the first one, idk why theres two) was there a fic that was really hard on you to write, or took you to a place you didn't think it would take you?

-the tiff fic :'^) ive always liked writing sorta dark stuff, ever since i was little, but this was on another level. sometimes i felt (and still do) feel a bit awkward bc i really do push myself to write stuff i feel a bit embarrassed or shocked by, but i do think that if i want to be a better writer it does me good to make an effort to depict stuff that makes me uncomfortable and seek to write it in a sense of finding a way to both make if effective and relatively tasteful (or at the very least in-character).

🎙️which one of your fics would you like someone to make a pod-fic of?

- i have never heard about pod-fic before, but i guess i can imagine what it is (wonder if its like an audiobook, or if it has sound effects and the like??). i would love to listen to an audiobook of the barbie frankenstein fic mostly bc i would love so so much to hear the dramatic literary dialogue ive written in kelly sheridans barbie voice. also now that i think about it i have no idea what the creature would even sound like... that would be an interesting challenge.

🤲 what do YOU get out of writing?

-practise writing in english, a sense of accomplishment (when i get to finish something!!) and every once in a while some strong validation in the form of ppl liking what i write... all of it is super valuable to me, especially practise and the push and drive to finish stuff to upload, but the validation in particular just really hits that dopamine in my brain i guess

💌 share something with us about an up-and-coming work (WIP) that has you excited!

-its from the glen and glenda fic im halfway planning! i got a few dialogues written and some scenes sketched out, but its still a long way to go. im very excited about it tho! ive grown to really love the versions of the twins ive made in my head. hopefully theyre faithful to their screen depictions while also adding a bit more depth and character building ive wanted to take them through.

[laconic-nightmares]

this is so helpful, christ.

I think im assisted by the fat my thoughts nowadays are less 'what ifa' and more... 'clockwork orange', thoughts that obviously arent real but that devastate me through their repulsivity alone.

ideally I'd hack that function of my brain and memories affected by it off and let that shard of me toil while I rest, recuperate, and then take it to get that whole thing fixed and ideally reintegrate that shard of myself? It would be a painful existence, but like... idk. if I knew it was not endless, and if I got to see me resting in a way I can't, I think I'd be able to manage?

I don't know what other options are available to me, but if its... an option, and if it will let me heal that part of myself and let the rest of me get to be a person, it seems worth pursuing? Idk where to start or if my preconceptions abt this are all wrong though.

again this is.... really a lot. it's either a light at the end of the tunnel, or relief that I'm not missing a way out I could've sought out. tysm.

they really can get quite disgusting, i know and i sympathize, sometimes it feels like having the worst fucked up horror movies just playing in your head 24/7 with no off button and it is completely understandable to be horrified and disgusted by them. i'm somewhat desensitized most of the violent/sexual ones these days because i decided to just. do art about it. oddly enough coping with fiction isn't just for the folks with ptsd, ahah.

obviously, you know your mind best, and you know yourself and your situation best. expectation and intent do have an effect on how these things turn out, even if there will always be things you didn't expect to show up. if you believe it would be compartmentalizing yourself to help you heal and rest, not just shoving them down into a box that never gets opened (by you, at least) again, that is a different story entirely.

and. well. just in general, even if it doesn't work out, trying sometimes is better than doing nothing. it really seems like you're at the end of your ability to cope alone and frankly even a 'bad' coping mechanism is still a coping mechanism if it's keeping you going.

i can try to rustle up some resources for creating headmates if you want/need me to. it's not something i talk about often because of the sysmeds but the r/tulpa subreddit is where we figured out we were plural, and we do have a 'tulpa' even if he doesn't really use the term anymore.

the other thing i would recommend you look into (or if you need me to do some googling, i will - frankly i'll probably have a look anyway for my own sake) is something called Exposure Response Prevention therapy. obviously these are 'best' done with a therapist/psychologist/someone who knows what they're doing, but sometimes just studying the thing can help to a degree if that isn't an option.

from what i understand ERP is considered the gold standard treatment for OCD currently, and i have seen anecdotal evidence to suggest it helps with intrusive thoughts.

other than that i just want to say that i am so proud of you for reaching out, and for taking steps to try and make things better for yourself. both of those things are so hard to do, especially with OCD brain

i can't promise super quick responses or that i'll have answers for everything, but our ask box is always open if you have other questions

[luminary-sunflower]

Friday, January 19, 2024

Everyone is waiting for the light Be afraid, don't be afraid The sun is shining out of my eyes It will not set tonight

Prompts taken from 7Cups 🍵

🍵How do I practice self compassion when struggling with depression?

I acknowledge the little things. Every achievement, no matter how small, is something to be proud of. I remind myself despite my lack of motivation/energy, all of my skills and aspirations are still there. I will get back to them in time, when it's right for me.

Gratitude, too. All of the small things in life that give me comfort or make life easier can be cherished.

I am patient with myself and with life. Things may pile up, but I can get through them. I may fall behind what I expected, but I am still making progress.

Sometimes the best progress comes after a period of rest. I can feel guilty about pushing myself to burnout, but I can also use this time to identify stressors that I can manage more effectively in the future.

🍵What are some positive things that can come from experiencing anxiety?

For me anxiety means I can slow down my thinking before taking action. Sometimes this means I have racing thoughts, but over time I'm learning how to carefully listen to what my fears are. They be irrational, but there may be a kernel of truth in them that is worth listening to. This has made me a more conscientious person and my loved ones say that I help them plan things thoroughly and consider options they otherwise wouldn't have.

🍵What can I let go of today?

I've let go of a lot of items this month. I really appreciate having a less cluttered space. It's given me new appreciation for the things I have and use regularly. Mentally, though, I want to and *can* let go of the belief I need others to "get" me. Some people refuse to understand me. Some people just made the choice to never have empathy or sympathy or even try for me, and that doesn't reflect negatively on myself. I don't have to make myself smaller for everyone to accept who I am.

✝️ I've really liked Job this month. And that Star Trek quote "It is possible to commit no mistakes and still lose, that is not a weakness, that is life" (or something like that - don't quote me).

When I was atheist, well more like agnostic, I felt like everything was so nihilistic. And then I realized that if nihilism can't be proven false, then I can just choose something else. What could someone tell me? No? Why would they think it would matter to tell me no if it doesn't matter? ☺️

I accepted my resentments with no justification. We need something more complex than that to cope rationally, it's just the human condition. We do better when things have meaning. And we have enough of God's image in us to make that image clearer with guidance.

The problem of evil with my atheist worldview is that it just is. It is just evil. It is just cruel. Accepting God means accepting that it doesn't have to be evil. It doesn't have to be cruel. It can just be. You can accept the bad things, because you are grateful that you are human enough to perceive them as bad. That means you have wisdom, a soul. All of these things are going to happen - famine, disease, death. But if you blame the actors in this world or even yourself, you're not seeing the full picture. You could find the director of the act you play and see the world as a story with themes and lessons, not abject and irrational suffering. And the best part about adopting this belief is that it will come true the stronger you believe it. You can act better in line with your role now.

And I have better ways to spend my time than engaging in addictive drama (when I'm in line with my goals that is). Did God know Eve would eat it, like Jesus knew Judas would betray him? Is that why women aren't afraid of angels when they speak to them? That's more fun. But helping others still matters. That's why I want to be more active on 7Cups. ^__^

Anyway... My new Pinhead figure should be coming TODAY! But it has my old apartment number (same building). I'm worried about this but trying to work up the courage to ask for help maybe even knock on the door of that person if needed.. Sigh. I don't want to. I feel silly. But you know in the grand scheme of things it isn't a big deal. I've solved much worse.

[voyeuristicvixen]

Captains Log N. 34_That’s Amora!

Amor Productions is in full effect and we have extended our inspirations and ideas to include more. We changed our last name to Amora which is Wav’s original last name but our company will still be Amor Productions and our videography work is put out under [Studio19] .. Its been a blast, and we actually have been getting commissions and inquiries and thats super cool. I never would have imagined that I would have a thriving business with my partner in this way where everything just flows seamlessly and without too much conflict. We just work well together! One thing I have some fears about is having equal recognition. In the art world, women are not really heard or seen on that level especially in filmmaking. We are barely pushing to make a place. I remember in RL film school I had a cinematography class that was hands on, and my teacher was a black woman and I was so very proud to be learning about how to set up lighting and wrap cables by a woman that could be my aunty. Theres something super special about it. Sometimes it so happens that Wav gets praised more for the work we do together and that can sting because I feel I put a lot of energy and time in to set the foundations and build the sets and make things happen but I am not appreciated for it. Most of the time I just annoy him with my work ethic because im always pushing us to start the next project to do the next step lmao. But I guess thats how it go! The great men of the world have all had the woman pushing them that we have yet to learn about... I am still grateful to have an opportunity to create and enjoy the work I do anyhow!

We are working on the next episode of Meta Love Talks. I have been pushing to get this done for weeks now lmao ! I found the spot I got us all set up figured out the lighting and everything. Its just a matter of getting Wav to get in gear. The man just loves to sleep!I get that rest is important I am just in a cycle where I want to make so many big dreams happen and I been sleeping on myself and my talents for too long!! I am the Taurus one but somehow he gets all the rest lmao.

We had a talk about this today and chopped it up to programming. I have been programmed by women who have had to do everything themselves. From my great-grandma down to my big sister, every woman in my family is single and self-sufficient. They have no time to rest.

All my life I was told that rest is lazy, that I myself was just a lazy girl and that growing up in America made me that way. In Africa girls start to work and cook and clean in the household from the moment they can walk and talk and hold things. They are peeling onions first thing you learn is to peel onions... 4/5 years old and peeling onions lmao. I am at the age where I don’t want to feel like a disappointment and resting makes me feel guilty af!  Thats the programming in my DNA and family thats also got us all messed up but I digress thats for another blog..

We been getting into Beyou and all those Sims SL huds that turn you into a sim lol. They are something I have always seen on the grid but never got into. My old SL life was very much that of a free love hippie, I just stayed on the commune, was naked half the time and DJing all kinds of freaky events like orgies and shit. We just lived super free and at peace and it was like nothing else on the grid anywhere. I never had the lifestyle of having a home, and family etc. This is really like a reflection of my rl too because back in the day my rl was crazy reckless too and now im at the age where settling down is the vibes. SL has always been my manifestation tool. If you understand how this reality is made of frequency, energy, and vibration you will see how technology is just an extension of nature and can be used for magicks or alchemy which is a science.

Of all the huds Beyou seems to have the most options but Mystory is the newest and most updated and is reasonably priced! Xeolife was one we were using before because I was obsessed with the Mystory cooking components. That was all I knew and used for a while! Storii Darkheart recently made a new Mystory hud thats like xeolife and beyou ! I like mystory, it is something new and theres affiliate scripts available so creators have more free range to make objects that will work with that hud. That for me is a big W. I want to make something for it for sure. Right now I am using both mystory and beyou those are my tops. Xeolife I was only using because of mystory anyway so I don’t really have any other use for it anymore. We’ll see what happens! Get the new Mystory HUD : http://maps.secondlife.com/secondlife/Fresh/210/70/23 (Its on the wall in the supermarket!)

Wav got frustrated as hell with the beyou system ngl lmaoooo XD sometimes its easier than others to get the food on your plate but I think its a pretty difficult thing to manage with scripts and the fact that you can rp like you are serving food is TOPS. I dont care that it messes up sometimes because when it works its impressive to me lmao. Plus they have African dishes and that for sure will win me over everytime. The only issue I had is that the peanut butter stew was vegan like WHYYY -_- It gotta be with beef or chicken at LEAST! Lmaoo

THIS WAS THE MEAL THAT GOT BAE OVER IT THE DAMN TURKEY NEVER SERVED FOR HIM LMAO! Thats when I showed him the mystory, I need to get his hud installed for him so that we can try that one together next. I hope that they eventually add skill levels, being able to share items and little details like the beyou hud has that make it more interactive like professions and being able to get marriage certificates and adoption papers etc. That all just adds to the sparkings of joyssss ^^ so far though its really impressive i gotta do another post on that!

Speaking of sparks joy, all my favs in one picture.... sleep in my office these two are always chillen in there with me haha. One thing this pic does not capture is the million cats that Bae has, he loves these little kittens and they always causing ruckus in my divination bowl lmao. Its the cutest thing tho. I love me some adorable chaos that ends in sweet snores. <3

I have been really enjoying the Beyou markets and exploring them and what they have to offer. This place had a great pharmacy that was giving goth vibes and when I went upstairs I found this woman in the loony bin. It was comfortably unsettling. Loved it.

Our first beyou fire, chillen in the living room... living by the beach during winter is super cozy because the air is crisp salt and the wood fireplace smell mixes real good with it. Its our version of winter frost. We always have pluto.tv on it is my favorite thing to watch when I just dont know what to watch and want to channel scroll. I always find something good that I never would have looked up by just scrolling pluto. On SL that site works really well because its live TV it syncs up for the most part with everyone so you all see the same thing at the same time. That is a big plus.

Now we been getting more consistent with Gridlife and just enjoying each other and ourselves. Its been nice. I really feel like somehow it helps me feel grounded with ttasks im trying to do when im just chillen in SL at the same time. Bae has been asked to be apart of a dope as Afrobeat festival I am very proud of him and happy for him. It will be dope asf! Im like lowkey a bit sad because I wasnt asked to join or be apart of it and I feel somehow entitled to be because im African because Ayra Starr follows me on IG and we’ve known each other before she blew up... because I grew up listening to and dancing to African music and being bullied for being African in school.... I felt like I should be apart of it... but alas, not everything is for me to join. The way I grew up, my background or knowledge does not matter if someone dont want you to join theres nothing you can do! *cries internally*

The face I am making here during this meeting with the dude on his plat says it all. I will just stay in my lane and do my lil thing. Whover sees my light sees it and whoever dont, dont. Ima support Wav regardless in everything he does and I am more than happy doing it because he deserves the recognition and the praise just as much! I build with him because I believe in him and his talents and his ideas. Thats how our love go. <3

A wild Foxey, bothered & black, but keeping it pushing anyway. XD

[soulmate-game]

Harley’s Plea for Help: Chapter 2

Chapter 1

“How long do you think it’s gonna take before she decides to sneak out?” Nightwing asked over his comms, lazily leaning against the balcony railing in front of him with his head resting on one hand.

“Dude, I started sneaking out almost twenty minutes ago,” a girl’s voice made Nightwing squeak and turn around, to reveal a teenage girl leaning against the door that led to the balcony he was on. “I didn’t want to draw attention to myself by doing unnecessarily showy gymnastics down from my hotel room’s balcony, no matter how much fun that would be, so I just snuck out one of the hotel’s back exits. Then I looked up to admire the moon and saw you here, staking out what is clearly my suite, and decided to come pay you a visit.”

“How long have you been there? And how did you even get behind me? I hope you didn’t break and enter, that’s an actual lived-in apartment behind us right now,” Nightwing asked, turning around to analyze the daughter of Harley Quinn for the first time in person.

She looked just like in her pictures, of course. Jet black hair like her father’s, except it seemed to have a bluish shine in the light. And her eyes were definitely Harley’s— thank goodness for that —vibrant blue and clearly analyzing him with the same amount of intensity as his did her. He had to bite back a chuckle. In a turn of complete irony, she really did look like a Wayne kid. Fit all of Bruce’s usual criteria to be adopted. But she was tiny, even smaller than Harley’s lithe form. He, Bruce, and Tim were of the hypothesis that the exposure both her parents had to Ace Chemical’s vats of acid likely had an effect on her DNA that stunted her growth. Perhaps there were other effects that they wouldn’t be able to figure out until they got to know her better, too, though it was clear that her skin was a likely one. It wasn’t unnaturally pale like her parent’s after their acid dips but it was paler than normal for sure, just a shade or two shy of being paper white.

And he could see, now, what Harley meant when she referred to Marinette as a powerhouse. It wasn’t very noticeable in pictures, but up close Dick could see the carefully honed muscle of an acrobat curling over her otherwise slim build. Combined with the knowledge that Marinette had been taught at least some serious self defense from a young age, he could see how such a tiny package could be a remarkable threat when necessary.

Marinette grimaced as the other Batfam, who were all nearby staking out her room from different angles, dropped onto the large balcony with them.

“Uh, well. I didn’t break and enter, I rather not get off to a criminal-ly start on my first night in Gotham, you know? But I realized that even though I was able to figure out the exact room you were staking me out from, I realized as soon as I got into the first floor of the building that I had no idea how to actually get to you. So I just climbed the stairs all the way to the roof and scaled my way down to this balcony, and pretended I’ve been here for a while when really I was barely able to hear you ask when I was gonna sneak out. I’m still out of breath, actually,” she put a hand on her chest and sure enough her breathing was still slightly fast. But not enough to be worrying or even all that noticeable. Yet another piece of evidence to show that she was a very active individual and had resistance built up to physical activity.

“Yup,” Robin groused grumpily, crossing his arms. “With all that rambling, you couldn’t be anyone else’s child but Quinzel’s.”

Marinette’s face immediately flushed pink all the way to her ears. “I’m sorry! I’ve been trying so hard to quit that habit, too!” She grumbled a bit to herself, putting her face in her hands. They all chuckled at the display. Red Hood ambled over, draping his arm over her shoulders (he nearly had to bend in half to do it, the height difference was that bad).

“As adorable as your freak out is, why’d you even come up here anyway? There’s no way you’d scale down a ten-story building just to say hello.”

She let out a heavy sigh at that, slowly peeling her face out of her hands. “Yeah, I recognized you guys right away. And honestly, as much as Momma Harley would be super proud of me for managing to give an entire group of vigilantes the slip, she’d also ground me for life if she found out that I saw you guys and still snuck away even though she probably swallowed her pride and asked you guys to babysit me, right? Self preservation. Contrary to popular belief, I do actually have some.”

“Wait,” Red Robin held up a hand, brows clearly furrowed under his cowl. “You expected her to ask for our help?”

“Well,” she made a so-so motion with her hand. “I didn’t think of it beforehand, but it all clicked once I saw Nightwing. I know how much my mom is worried about me, especially since you-know-who broke out a few days ago. She is more than worried enough to ask you guys for help. Even if she does complain about you guys, a lot actually, she also has made it clear that she trusts you guys with the stuff that actually matters.

“‘You know who’?” Batman repeated, arms crossed. If Marinette squinted, she thought there might have been a grin on his lips. “Is that how you always refer to him?”

“What else am I gonna call him?” she asked, face going deadpan. “Sperm donor? Source of a large amount of my self doubt and depreciation? The prime reason I haven’t been able to see my mom in person more often over the years? Oh, I know! How about I just always refer to him as ‘that bastard I wanna punch,’? That sounds good!” she rolled her eyes sarcastically. “Only one person in this world has the right to be considered my father in any capacity, and it sure as hell isn’t him. Genetics notwithstanding.”

Red Hood straight up guffawed at that, landing several rough pats on her back that made the girl stumble a bit. “Yep, I like this one! But as fun as it would be to see you give that jackass a mean left hook, it’s better if he never finds out who you are or knows that you’re here,” the vigilante’s voice got dark and serious very quickly. “He doesn’t forget people he finds interesting easily, and if he ever finds out about the connection you have to him, he’ll be a constant threat in your life.”

“I know,” Marinette agreed with a nod. “And if this conversation was happening two years ago, I’d say that my mom’s concerns aren’t unfounded. That I am too easily emotionally compromised and despite my deep seated issues and hatred for that man, I couldn’t guarantee he would be unable to get to me.”

Batman straightened up, as did all of his sons around him. None of them had missed the ‘if’ there. Batman’s voice went from charmingly deep to it’s usual gruff grumble. “What changed in two years?”

They all watched as Marinette gulped, taking a deep breath as she stalled for time, looking out at the view on the balcony before seeming to steel herself and return her gaze to Batman’s. When she did, it was suddenly full of iron will.

“I didn’t lie when I told Mom that I came to visit her— but that isn’t the whole truth, either. If I just wanted to visit her in Gotham, I would have waited until I was eighteen like we agreed. But I can’t wait, Paris can’t keep going on like this. I entered that contest because it was the fastest way to see you. I didn’t know if I would win, but… I had to take the chance. There was no way I’d be able to get to Gotham behind my mom’s back otherwise.”

“What are you talking about?” Robin hissed, stepping up to his father’s side. “Paris has been silent. If anything were happening, we would have heard about it by now.”

“No, you wouldn’t,” Marinette corrected, never losing that ironclad look in her eyes. “Because a combination of magic and politics is keeping it quiet. No news about Paris’ situation is able to leave the city limits. Magic makes any non-native who leaves Paris think that everything they experienced was just a crazy dream. Natives won’t forget, but politics has all of us under very strict NDAs if we leave city boundaries, and all of our local news and social media is blocked from being accessed by anyone outside the city. But, I figured a little breaking of the rules wouldn’t exactly put a stain on my family’s reputation or anything, so,” she dug in her pocket and pulled out a thumb drive, holding it up for all of them to see. She swallowed again, but never stopped her eye contact with Batman. She held out the thumb drive.

“I came to Gotham to ask for your help. This sped things up, I didn’t expect to see you on my first night here, but two years in Hawkmoth’s Paris has really taught me how to roll with the punches. This,” she shook the thumb drive. “Holds videos of every fight since HawkMoth first showed up. It has all the information I’ve gathered over two years, tracks his movements and lists all his targets and— everything. But I’m not a detective, I’m a designer. I make clothes, I spar on the weekends, I am not good at getting evidence to prove that someone is a magic-abusing villain holding an entire city hostage.”

“We’re gonna need some details, Little Q,” Red Hood finally removes his arm from around her shoulders, instead crossing his arms and looking down at her sternly. “If your city has a villain holding it hostage, is anyone fighting him? And if you do have someone fighting him, why don’t you need our help, or why didn’t they call the Justice League? The JLE should be in Paris, right?”

Marinette snorted, face scrunching up in obvious distaste. “I’ll have to answer those a little out of order. First; the JLE was kicked out of Paris. They moved their headquarters to Italy about five years ago, I’m just surprised they apparently kept that secret from you,” she gestured to all of them, who indeed seemed very caught off guard by that tidbit. But Marinette just sighed and continued. “Though that’s a good thing, actually. We do have heroes, it started out as just a pair but it’s grown into a small team out of necessity. They didn’t call the Justice League because the last thing we need is any powered heroes coming in and making it worse— your league doesn’t have the best reputation for letting newer heroes take the lead even on their home turf, you know,” she pointed out, which made Batman shift a bit guiltily. He knew the JL was often a bit… heavy handed in their methods.

“What makes the situation so bad that you don’t want to bring experienced heroes into it?” Red Robin cut in, sounding as if the whole situation was a puzzle he was determined to sort out. Which, really, was exactly what Marinette had been counting on. She shot him a finger gun, grinning.

“That’s exactly the point! Hawkmoth uses a magical artifact, like I said— but this artifact can brainwash anybody who experiences even the slightest negative emotion. Sadness, anger, fear— anything negative. And it gives them powers, but puts them largely under his influence,” her expression twisted again, this time into a wry little grimace. “I guess you can say that my momma’s psychiatry background has secretly come in handy a lot over these past two years. And Hawkmoth is exactly why I try to tell Momma Harley to stop visiting me— I have worked my butt off to keep her from finding out about his attacks or getting Akumatized. Every time she shows up it gives me a heart attack!”

“Akumatized?”

Marinette waved a hand dismissively. “It’s the term used for when someone is turned into a super powered villain because of HawkMoth. The brainwashing— really it’s more similar to a straight up corruption. The person usually lacks their usual moral compass, and just seeks to soothe whatever set off their negative emotion in the first place. Usually, that means they seek a bloody revenge. And if someone who already has extensive training or extremely strong powers gets Akumatized, guess what?” She made jazz hands even though her face was deadpan. “Extra powers, or amplified ones, for the metas or superheroes who are Akumatized. And imagine what someone with, say, Batman’s level of experience could do if he had powers and no moral compass,” the silence that followed her words was deafening. She just nodded, knowing she had gotten her point across. “I’ve been working my butt off to stay positive, because if I’m Akumatized…” her shoulders fell, and she had to swallow a lump in her throat. “... I have no idea what I’d turn into, but if you take into consideration both my training and my family history… it’s really best if we never find out what kind of magic-powered supervillain I’d make.”

“So, let me get this straight,” Nightwing said after another long moment of silence for that to all sink in. He gestured at her with an open palm. “You’ve been dealing with a terrorist for two years who targets emotional vulnerability, you apparently have never been corrupted by this magic at least to present day, but your mother still worries about you being very emotionally fragile. And your heroes are not detectives, which is clearly what you need or you wouldn’t have asked us for our help.”

Marinette nodded. “I used to be very impressionable. At the start of all this, I was a huge people-pleaser. I got attached to new people in a matter of minutes. My mom always said I reminded her too much of herself— but two years of fighting off a guy trying to get into my head—“

“Wait,” Batman nearly barked, taking a step forward. “He’s been targeting you? You specifically?”

Marinette nodded grimly, mouth a straight line. “Not from the beginning, but this past year it’s been painfully obvious. He might be able to sense the strength of people’s emotions, and unfortunately I don’t exactly experience my emotions very… gently. All of my emotions tend to the much more intense side of the spectrum. If that’s true, then he might know that any negative emotion I feel will make an extremely strong Akuma. Either that, or he’s going by process of elimination. All of my friends, except for one, have been Akumatized already. So has my Papan and my grandmother. But it’s obvious when he’s targeting someone, I’ve felt him try to override my will on several occasions. But I can’t just repress all of my negative emotions forever, so consider us working against the clock right now. That thumb drive has all the details you need about our heroes, how exactly Hawkmoth’s powers work, and so on.”

“Do your heroes know you’re asking for our help?” Red Robin asked, gaze burning a figurative hole through Marinette’s face. “Better yet, if this drive has as much information as you say it does, how did you get it?”

Marinette handed the drive over to Batman, who finally took it and tucked it in his belt as she answered.

“Momma Harley might have a lot to say about your detective skills, but you are all still strangers to me. So consider this a test of your abilities— I expect that you will all go to extreme lengths to verify all of the information I gave you anyway. After all, I’m still the daughter of your most hated enemy. Right?” She met each of their gazes, one by one, with a challenging one of her own. “You’ll just have to figure out my connection to the heroes on your own. And how I got the information, too. It shouldn’t be too hard for the so-called world’s greatest detectives. And maybe this can double as a trust exercise. I fully expect you guys to scour through every inch of my past, and dig up everything you can on me. I encourage you to try to find everything you can, so that hopefully you can decide to trust me on your own once you have all the details laid out in front of you. By the way, for your own sanity? I’d start with reading about all of our heroes’ powers and abilities before you watch any footage of past attacks.”

Red hood rocked back on his heels, trading glances with the other vigilantes before they all shared a nod. Apparently having decided their course of action, Red Hood leaned down and hoisted Marinette up into a princess carry. All traces of her previous iron will melted away in favor of the high pitched squeal of surprise she gave, and once more she became an overly flustered teenager.

“Alright, little cutie. Let’s get you to your mom’s place before she and her crazy plant lady fiancé come hunting us down.”

“I can walk! I can freerun on my own! Mon dieu please let me down! Eeeeek!” She squealed again as Robin slapped a domino mask over her eyes and Red Hood wasted no time jumping over the balcony railing with her still in his arms. The fact that they were lowered down by a wire wrapped around Hood’s waist didn’t seem to take away any of the fright that came with a sudden drop over an eighth-story balcony.

Part 1

@emotionalsupportginger @alysrose-starchild @emistar0 @kibastray @justanotherfanficlovinbitch @alyssadeliv @blackroserelina @blackstarlight-co @readingalldaysleepingallnight @maanae @aespades @jaybird-and-co @fleursroses @probably-a-hologram @misterpianoman (didn’t work sorry)

[storiesforallfandoms]

i don’t need your help ~ jace herondale;shadowhunters

word count: 2524

request?: yes!

“Alec Lightwood or Jace Herondale (either one works) smut? If you're comfortable with writing for shadowhunters, ofc <3″

description: after a run in with a demon that almost turns bad, a fight between her and one of her fellow shadowhunters turns into something so much more

pairing: jace herondale x female!reader

warnings: swearing, mentions of violence, smut

masterlist (one, two)

Izzy helped me limp into the Institute, my body feeling run down and exhausted already. She laid me down on a bed and it took me a moment to register that it was my own bed. I was aching all over, but I tried to keep a brave face. At least, I thought I was keeping a brave face. For all I knew I was sobbing like a baby.

“I’ll get my stele,” she told me. “Just...just stay awake, okay?”

I tried to respond but it came out as a pained moan instead. Izzy quickly raced from my room to her own. I could hear her in the distance furiously looking for here stele. I tried to stay awake but my eyes were starting to grow heavy and my head was lulling back against the pillow under me. The thought of drifting off into unconsciousness felt like the best idea I had ever had in that moment.

I heard someone at the door and thought it was Izzy coming back. When I looked up, I saw it was Jace standing in my doorway. His face was pale and he was staring at me in horror. I could only imagine how awful I looked.

“(Y/N),” he breathed. He quickly raced to my side and pulled his stele out. “What the hell happened to you?”

“She had a run in with a demon while she was alone,” Izzy responded, appearing at Jace’s side. “I got there just in time. Can you help me draw healing ruins? She’s going to need a few.”

“I’m way ahead of you.”

The slight burn of Jace’s stele touching my arm caused me to let out a yelp of pain. He looked at me with sympathy as he continued to draw the healing Rune. Izzy moved to my other side and started drawing a Rune there too. It hurt as they were drawing them, but I felt a numbness wash over my body as the Rune started to take effect.

Jace started to stroke my hair after drawing another ruin on me. He looked down at me, his face full of concern. “Rest while the ruins do their work, (Y/N).”

Getting Jace’s permission to finally rest felt like a blessing, and within seconds I was passed out.

~~~~~~

I wasn’t sure how long I was out. When I woke up again, my head still felt heavy and my vision was spinning a little. I tried to lift my head to look around, but it felt like someone had poured nails into my head and shaken it. I groaned and laid back down again, raising my hand to put it on my forehead. I realized then that the pain had completely left my body, except for the headache I had, and I felt good as new again.

“How long have I been out?” I asked, turning my head to see who had stayed with me while I was unconscious. I knew either Jace or Izzy had. They weren’t going to leave me when I was in such rough condition.

Through the slight darkness of my room, I could make out the figure sitting down as Jace. I was slightly shocked to see that Jace was the one who had stayed. Despite his caring and concerned nature when Izzy had first brought me home, the two of us weren’t exactly close. We didn’t hate each other or anything, but we were constantly fighting and he irritated the hell out of me. I didn’t think his kindness would extend to staying with me while I was unconscious.

“A few hours,” he responded. “It’s 2am now, you got back around 8 or 9pm I think.”

I groaned. “I definitely feel like I’ve been out for five or six hours.”

“What were you thinking?” Jace questioned, rising from his seat. “Facing a demon alone? You were lucky that Izzy had known where you were or else you definitely wouldn’t have been feeling as good as you do now.”

“Thanks for that, Captain Obvious,” I muttered. “For your information, I didn’t go out with the intentions of facing a demon alone. I was just out and I got cornered by a demon that knew I was a Shadowhunter. I wasn’t expecting it and it got the jump on me.”

“You shouldn’t have gone out on your own at all. You know the dangers of being caught are high, especially when you can be spotted at any time by a demon.”

I braced myself as I sat up, the pounding feeling in my head intensifying for just a moment, before slowly numbing again.

“I can’t stay cooped up here forever, Jace,” I retorted. “I’m more than capable of taking care of myself.”

“Obviously you’re not or else you wouldn’t have been on death’s doorstep when you got back here.”

“I was not on death’s doorstep. Izzy found me in time, but even if she hadn’t I would’ve been fine.”

“You didn’t look fine.”

I groaned and rolled my eyes. “Listen Jace, I appreciate this...concern you have for me, but I’m fine. I don’t need this lecture, I don’t need anyone’s help, especially not yours. You’ve made it very clear that you don’t actually like me all that much, so you don’t need to continue this caring act, or the lecture. I’m fine and I can take care of myself.”

The tension hung in the air. I expected Jace to walk away and to finally leave me alone. You can imagine my shock when he approached me suddenly, putting one hand behind my head and pulling me in for a kiss.

I was shocked. I didn’t know how to respond to it. I thought for a second that Jace had gone insane, that maybe some Downworlder had scrambled his brain or something. There was no way in Hell that Jace Herondale would willingly kiss me. I was just a torn in his side, and he was one in mine.

But something just felt right about the kiss. His rough hands were gentle as one cupped the back of my neck while the other was wrapped around my waist. He pulled me forward to the edge of the bed, nudging my legs open so he could stand between them. My hands were gripping the t-shirt he was wearing, taking in every last bit of him that I could.

I felt myself laying back on my bed against, Jace’s hand still under my head. He moved with me, hovering over me as our lips moved perfectly in sync with one another. His other hand slipped under my shirt, softly trailing up my side until he reached my bra. We broke away from the kiss just long enough for Jace to pull my shirt over my head and unhook my bra in one swift motion.

He looked down at me, his beautiful different colored eyes soft but full of lust. He gently ran his fingers over my cheek before pressing his lips against mine once more, then moving to start kissing cheek, my jaw, my neck. His lips hovered a moment over the fresh Runes that he and Izzy had drawn on my skin. When he pressed a kiss against them, it almost felt like he was soothing the slight burn that was still there. He continued to gently brush his lips over the white scars left behind from other Runes that had been drawn on my skin for years.

My head fell back against the pillow underneath me as Jace’s lips continued to kiss down my chest and stomach, stopping just above the hem of my jeans. He looked up at me, waiting for permission. When I nodded, he made quick work of pulling my jeans and panties off at one time. He pressed another light kiss just above m aching core before diving in with his tongue.

I gasped at the pleasurable feeling. Of course, being a Shadowhunter doesn’t mean you never have sex. Quite the opposite, really. All four of us in the Institution were no strangers to sex. But this...this was a feeling of pleasure beyond what I had ever experienced before. I blamed the fact that I had only ever had sex with Mundane men before now.

I ran a hand through Jace’s hair and grabbed hold of it. The action caused him to moan against me, the vibrations running through my body.

He lifted his head for air, replacing his tongue with his fingers as he lightly played with my clit.

“I can’t describe how long I’ve been waiting for this,” he said, placing gentle kisses against my stomach again.

“You have a weird way of sh - oh  - owing it,” I said, trying to tease him through the pleasure he was giving me.

He smiled in response and moved his hand away. I whimpered from the lack of contact, an action I wasn’t too proud of afterwards but in the moment I could care less.

Jace kissed my lips again, the taste of my arousal on his lips and tongue. It turned me on even more and I just wanted to have him inside of me.

I pushed him down onto the bed and climbed onto his lap, straddling him. He looked impressed by my action. I ran my hands down his still clothed chest, reaching the bottom of his shirt.

“I hardly think it’s far that you’re still dressed while I’m completely naked,” I said.

“Well, we can fix that,” he responded.

I made quick work of taking his clothes off, discarding them somewhere on the floor with my own. When I pulled his boxers down, I audibly gasped at his length. He chuckled at my reaction. “Surprised?”

“Surprised that my fantasies were true,” I responded.

Jace raised an eyebrow at me. “You’ve fantasized about me?”

I took him in my hand and started to slowly stroke him. A breathy gasp escaped from his mouth as he fell completely helpless to my touch.

“It’s hard not to sometimes,” I admitted. “When you’re walking around here in your tight clothes, or with no shirt on. You’re so confident and cocky, it’s hard not to imagine what you’d be like in bed.”

“You finally have the real me here,” he said. “Why not make those fantasies a reality?”

He didn’t have to asked twice.

I spit onto the head of his dick, using my hand to spread it all over him before lining him up with my entrance. The moment his tip slipped inside of me, we both moaned in pleasure and relief. So much built up tension between us, sexual and otherwise, finally being released.

I slowly sat myself down on him, taking in every inch. His hands found their way to my hips, his fingers digging in so harshly that I was sure I’d have bruises there. Once I had adjusted to his size, he started rocking my hips against him, the friction starting to build between us.

I placed my hands on his chest, trying to steady myself as I took over rocking my hips. He looked into my eyes, his mouth partially open as moans and whimpers escaped from his lips. Even with these small movements he was hitting a spot inside of me that I had never felt before. I was almost sure I’d orgasm within seconds.

Jace sat up then, wrapping one arm around my waist while planting the other one on the bed behind him. I wrapped my arms around his shoulders, holding on tightly as he began to thrust up into me. The motions were rougher and faster, hitting that spot inside of me with a force I hadn’t felt before. I buried my head in Jace’s shoulder, trying to muffle my moans as I remembered there were two other people living in the Institution.

“Does that feel good?” he asked.

“Fuck Jace,” I moaned. “That feels so fucking good. I might...I might...”

“What are you gonna do, princess?”

Fuck! And a pet name, too? I was putty in his hands.

I couldn’t even finish my sentence. My climax built up quick and hit me before I was even ready for it. I moaned Jace’s name against his shoulder as I felt myself clenching around him, a warm sensation running through my body.

“Fuck,” he breathed, his thrusts becoming sloppier. “I’m gonna cum.”

“Cum in me,” I whispered. “Please, Jace.”

He threw his head back and groaned as I felt him finish inside of me. I gasped at the feeling, which was almost enough to make me orgasm again.

Jace fell backwards onto the bed, taking me with him. I giggled as I settled against his chest, still wrapped around his softening member. I could stay like that for hours if Jace wanted to.

“Maybe I should get attacked by demons more often,” I mumbled to myself.

Jace tensed under me. “I would much rather if you didn’t.”

I moved my head to look up at him, raising an eyebrow. “Relax, I was only joking. I meant what I said earlier, Jace, I can handle demons on my own.”

He relaxed again, starting to trace his fingers up and down my back. “I know you can. I shouldn’t have overreacted earlier. I’m sorry.”

Normally I’d make some quip about him apologizing, but some things were starting to add up in my head. “You were always hounding me and shit because you were worried for me.”

It wasn’t a question, but Jace responded anyways. “Yeah. I...I just never wanted you to get hurt.”

“Jace, I’m a Shadowhunter just like you. I’ve faced numerous Downworlders before, both by myself and with you guys. I can take care of myself, you don’t have to worry about me.”

“I’m well aware of that. I’ve always been impressed with your fighting skills. It’s just...I care for you in a way that I’ve never cared for someone before. I always worry when you’re out with Izzy or Alec or anyone who isn’t me because I’m afraid of the day that...maybe you don’t come back. When I saw you earlier today...I was so terrified that I was actually going to lose you.”

I propped myself up a bit to take Jace’s face in my hands. “I appreciate how much you care, but you have to have faith in me, Jace. This is the first time I’ve seriously been injured while fighting a Downworlder, and I promise you it’ll be the last time too.”

Jace nodded. I smiled a little and leaned down to kiss him again. I finally decided to untangle myself from him, although I felt empty without him inside of me. I laid down next to him, feeling sleepy from our earlier activities.

My eyes were starting to close when Jace said, “Hey (Y/N).”

“Yeah?”

“Maybe we should close the door next time we decide to have sex.”

My eyes popped open to see that my bedroom door was wide open. I hadn’t noticed that earlier, what with being...“preoccupied” and all. I groaned and buried my face in Jace’s chest as he laughed.

[bitches-who-write]

you guys said in other posts that Henry and Patrick likes to scare. can you write a story on a reader whose naturally jumpy and scares way to easily. maybe a story about what they do to her? if you can make it reaally scary and teasy I like that. your guys writing is out of this world. thanx

Your wish is our command!

Scaredy Cat

Description: Reader is easily scareable/jumpy. Henry and Patrick take full advantage of this. Featuring Belch & Vic (Spinoff of our haunted house fic)

Word Count: 2,979

Warning: Suspense, Terror, Foul language,

We hope you enjoy this story as much as we enjoyed writing it. It’s our longest post yet so we’re feeling proud!! It definitely brings on Halloween Vibes for those of you who are as obsessed about Halloween as we are!

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Everyone knows Eddie Kaspbrak is a nervous kid but Y/N, Eddie’s sister is even more of a scaredy-cat. Henry and Patrick could smell your fear a mile away. It’s the day before Halloween and the town of Derry is celebrating their annual haunted house attraction. Typically the last walk-through is at midnight, but Henry and Patrick have an alternative plan for their easily scareable victim.

It’s the middle of the afternoon and all anyone at school can talk about is how terrifying the haunted house attraction is going to be. I sit at an empty cafeteria table alone working on my history homework when suddenly I feel a hand grab my shoulder. I practically jump out of my skin, already feeling on edge from all the Halloween talk. I abruptly turn around to face whoever is behind me. To my surprise, it is Patrick Hockstetter and Henry Bowers. I shiver feeling the mixture of Patrick’s cool metal rings and callused hands slide down my arm, gently caressing my sides. I try to lean forward to escape his unwanted embrace, both of them still snickering from my startled reaction. “Holy shit dude, you weren’t kidding she is worse than her wimpy brother.” Henry chortled. I look up at them with a confused expression which only makes Patrick look even more satisfied. “That's right Y/N, I’ve been watching you...studying you....taking a few notes.” Patrick takes a dramatic pause, grinning before continuing; “ I’ve learned a lot of interesting things about you. Like what your fears and phobias are, and what scares you the most- which is a lot coming from you.” Henry chimes in “We noticed the way you glance over your shoulder when you’re all alone, and how you quickly turn on a light when you get home so you’re not in the dark for long.” My eyes widen in shock, realizing they’ve been stalking me without me even knowing it. I finally mustered up the courage to speak but unfortunately for me, my voice dripping from uncertainty and apprehension; “What do you guys want?” With a playful smirk, Henry grabs a chair and turns it so the back of the chair is facing me, resting his arms over it as he sits down. Patrick takes a seat directly next to me but slings his arm around my side, trapping me against him and the table. Henry, never breaking eye contact, finally speaks up first. He licks his lips before leaning in close, his voice full of malice, “We just want to spend time with you. Be ready by midnight we’re picking you up.” They both begin to stand up and walk away but Patrick slowly turns back towards me, “Oh and Y/N... that’s an order.” With that, they both exit the cafeteria leaving me trembling in fear.

I anxiously get ready knowing they will be here in another 10 minutes. I told my mother I was spending the night at a friend's house. Eddie had already gone to his sleepover at Richie’s house so I couldn’t even warn him about my whereabouts for the night. As I finish getting ready, I can’t shake the uneasy feeling that I’m being watched. I chalk the feeling off thinking I’m just being paranoid at this point. I walk into my closet to grab a jacket. When I reach for the pull string to turn on the light, of course, the lightbulb is dead- just my luck. I begin to slide each jacket down the rack trying to find the one I want when suddenly something-or someone grabs my wrist causing me to scream in terror. I pulled my wrist back with such force that I stumbled backwards falling on my ass. I try to scoot back to get away from whoever is now slowly approaching me. The tall dark figure slowly emerges from the dark closet, stepping into the light of my bedroom. My eyes widened in both panic and shock seeing Patrick standing there with an eerie smirk plastered on his face. In a mocking tone he says “You ready princess? It's time to go.” Still sitting on the floor with my back up against my bed, I then feel someone squeeze my sides from under the bed. I let out another blood-curdling scream as I jolt forward frantically crawling towards Patrick now, not knowing where to go anymore. I distinctly hear Henry’s laugh from under the bed sounding satisfied that his little prank was successful. “Fuck, it’s a good thing your mom is such a heavy sleeper.” He says in an arrogant tone. Patrick flashes him a knowing smirk adding to Henry’s observation. “Yeaaah. I’m sure those pills probably helped, too.” This made both guys laugh hysterically. “What?! What did you do to my mother?!” I ask in utter disbelief and confusion. “Ohh calm the fuck down, she’ll be fine she’s just having a good...rest.” Patrick says now guiding me by my shoulder towards the door to leave the house now.

We walk out to a blue car sitting outside the front of my house; Belch in the driver seat, chuckling. After about a 15 minute drive, we finally arrived at our destination. I had no clue where these two psychos were even taking me up until now. I look up and see a nightmarish haunted house attraction. However, for a place that is so popular in Derry, especially the night before Halloween- not a soul is around. I hesitantly step out of the car; Belch giving me a big taunting smile from his place in the car. “Good luck, Y/N” and with that, he sped off.

I try my best to be brave but my facial expression and voice says otherwise. My eyes nervously look around taking in the scenery, the palms of my hands are sweaty, and I feel a lump in my throat as I try to swallow. “W-W-Where is e-everyone? Why is n-n-nobody here?” I instantly begin to blush as they laugh at my shaky, nervous voice. Patrick’s smirk begins to grow into a wider smile as he becomes giddy in excitement, unable to stand still in one place. He jumps in front of me, facing my direction as he holds my shoulders. I glance over at Henry who is looking over at us with a knowing smirk. “That is the best part...you’re gonna love it Y/N; It’s gonna be a scream!” I continue to feel uneasy since Patrick still hasn’t answered my question about why no one else is here. Finally, Henry speaks up. “Let’s just say the Bower’s gang gets special treatment when it comes to getting what we want. Now we have the whole place to ourselves.” My stomach sinks realizing they probably terrorized the poor workers into closing the attractions. Patrick grabs my hand forcefully pulling me into the makeshift haunted house building. I tried to dig my heels into the ground to stop us but that obviously didn’t work as he is much stronger and taller than myself. Even if it did work, Henry would be right there to catch me so there is no use in trying to escape them.

Henry takes the lead opening the black curtain into the house, revealing a long dark corridor. The only light source illuminating the path was from the moonlight. I look up at Patrick who is on my left side. With pleading eyes I begin to mouth the words ‘no’ over and over again at him. He just smirks and shoves me forward. I clutch onto Patrick's arm as the three of us venture down to the first room...a Medical Experimentation Chamber.

As I walk into the room I frantically begin to look around at my surroundings. The room is dimly lit yet there are disorienting strobe lights flickering, blinding me. I squint my eyes to focus on my surroundings better. It looks like there's a lot of twists and turns ahead. I see medical tables equipped with thick straps and buckles for restraints. Alongside these tables is medical equipment that looks dented and rusty...or is that blood?. In addition to the visual distractions, there are deafly loud sound effects of patients screaming and the sounds of surgical tools being played on a loop. I was so distracted by my surroundings that I didn't notice Patrick trailing behind me. He proceeds to pick me up from behind and lays me down onto the medical table. Henry walks over and holds me by my arms and legs so Patrick can strap me in. They both back away from me laughing as I see someone enter the room. The man that walked in was dressed as a surgeon in all white, I could see he was covered in blood. My eyes widen in hysteria as I notice his facial features. His eyes were very sinister, his nose looked as if it was broken with a gashed cut on the bridge of his nose with a jagged hack job of stitches. My eyes began to fixate on his mouth which was spread wide and sewn into a gruesome smile. His teeth were jagged and sharp. As he leans down towards me, lowering his surgical tool; I begin to scream and thrash against my restraints. Suddenly everything becomes pitch black and the deafening noise vanishes. The only noises left in the room were the sound of me screaming and crying along with Henry and Patrick laughing their asses off. The room became dimly lit again as Henry began to undo the restraints. As he works to unbuckle me I frantically look around trying to find the surgeon who was just in here, but suddenly disappeared. I sat up slowly trying to compose myself although my body is trembling excessively. Patrick gave me no breaks as he continues to push me forward towards the next room...The SlaughterHouse.

As we walk into the next room, I am desperately holding onto the back of Henry’s shirt begging to go home. I can hear him chuckle  arrogantly as he feels me gripping his shirt. Patrick whispers in my ear from behind, his hands placed firmly on my hips, “But the fun is just getting started princess.” I take a deep breath before asking no one in particular, “Can someone hold my hand? ..Please?” My voice filled with terror and practically pleading. They both look at each other at the same time, laugh and respond with a mocking as they imitate my voice- “noOoO.” I look down at my feet feeling so small until I can hear what sounds like metal clanking together- echoing louder and louder. I completely stop dead in my tracks, my legs feeling so wobbly as we enter a room with hooks. So many hooks with prosthetic pigs hanging on them! I hear Patrick from behind me chuckle and say in a taunting sing-song type voice, “Come on Y/N~ keep moving.” Henry looks at us, laughing in amusing sporting that same smirk that never left his face. Henry slowly approaches me with a mischievous glint in his eyes. His voice is low and cold, “ Hey Y/N ever wonder what it felt like to be a pig hanging on a hook?” My eyes widen as he says this and I quickly try to make a run for it but Patrick is fast to grab me before I could. He begins to carry me over to Henry effortlessly despite my squirming. Patrick puts me down then shoves me into Henrys chest. Henry then picks me up and places me on one of the metal hooks, putting a hole in my favorite black jacket. I begin crying..again this time sobbing uncontrollably as I struggle to say, “G-Guys this r-r-really isn't f-funny. I wanna gah-g-go home now. Get me d-down pleasee!” They both laugh at my breakdown and begin to walk out of the room. Patrick peeks his head back in, “Just hang there for a sec princess, we’ll be right back ~” Henry chimes in “I wouldn’t give the butcher a hard time if I were you. He hates when you struggle...” I hear them laugh in the distance as they walk off again. That's when I heard it...that's when I heard the sound of a chainsaw and heavy footsteps charging towards me. I scream so loud I start to lose my voice a little, but it doesn’t stop me from trying. A man that looks well over 6ft tall with broad shoulders walks in. He looks like he came straight out of the Texas Chainsaw Massacre. At this point, I’m bawling my eyes out, screaming and desperately calling for Henry and Patrick’s help. Although realistically I know the chainsaw has no blade on it, it’s still equally terrifying. The butcher brings the saw somewhat close to my face. I wince, closing my eyes tightly as the strong scent of gasoline invades my nose, along with a faint musty smell coming off the chainsaw, as well as the man in front of me. I brace myself for the impact which never came. I opened my eyes to see the man lowering the chainsaw instead. I let out a sigh of relief thinking he is going to let me down but instead he pulls out a blindfold. At this point, I can literally hear my heartbeat pulsating through my ears. I’m trying to kick aimsley now that can't see anything. That’s when I feel someone grabbing at my legs. My blindfold drops down as I see Patrick looking up at me with his famous smile. Henry begins to get me down as he mockingly says, “I told you he hates it when you struggle, didn’t I?”

I am violently shaking from adrenaline to the point that they have to keep me upright, sandwiched in the middle of them both. I look at them and ask between sobs, “Are we done yet? Can I go home now? Please?” Henry condescendingly pats my head as if I am a child while Patrick chuckles and says, “We have one more room to complete and you’re their special guest...they kept vacancy just for you!”

As we exit the slaughterhouse we suddenly are displaced into a parking lot. A rush of confusion washes over me. Patrick just said there’s still one more room left, why are we outside? I shiver out of fright as Patrick rubs his hands up and down my arms, his head tilted as he looks at me with a teasing smirk. Henry nudges me and points up to a sign which reads “Motel” with a crooked red light flickering. It reads ‘Vacancy’. The makeshift motel looks runned-down and absolutely filthy. Henry and Patrick lead me to the front office. Opening the creaky wooden door on a spring, I walk in cautiously. I quickly become distracted by several different TV scenes that display [fake] murders taking place in the motel rooms by masked men. Blood-curdling screams fill my ears, making me even more thrown off guard. As I look around the office more, Patrick takes 2 long strides towards the front desk and rings the silver bell that is placed on the corner of the desk. I jump, flinching as he looks at me smirking. “I don’t think anyone is home.” He says in a sarcastic voice. Henry shoves me forward towards the back room now. He kneels down and opens a trap door. He looks up at me, “Ladies first.” Patrick snickers behind me as I cautiously started entering the crawlspace on my hands and knees. As I am crawling forward in the dirt ground, I feel Patrick smack and grab my ass causing me to jump, hitting my head in the cramped, narrow space. Patrick lets out a satisfied laugh. “You know, your ass is your only redeeming quality princess… that and your fear.” This earns a laugh from Henry, as well, who reaches under Patrick and grabs my ankle  unexpectedly; pulling me back. I let out a little yelp and eat dirt. They both start laughing again. Finally, we reach the end of the crawlspace. Patrick reaches over me and pushes up on the door to open it. I feel Patrick lift me slightly so I can pull myself out. I take note of my surroundings. That underground path lead us from the motel office, to now one of the bedrooms. As I straighten myself out, Henry and Patrick follow closely behind, climbing out of the craw-space, as well. Before I move forward I made the decision to grab Patrick’s hand despite what he said earlier about hand-holding.

Patrick looks down at me smirking but doesn't say anything. In fact, he actually holds my hand back, intertwining his fingers tightly between mine but I can tell there’s an ulterior motive behind his actions. The door handle to the motel bedroom begins to violently shake and jiggle. The door slowly opens revealing two men wearing masks. They are headed right towards me, their long legs approaching quickly. I try to back up but sadly I was still holding onto Patrick... or should I say he is holding onto me. At this point, Patrick picks me up and literally throws me onto the bed. The weight of his body is holding my legs down. As I’m struggling against Patrick, Henry walks over and holds my arms tightly above my head giving Patrick a better hold of my legs. The two masked men walk over and one of them pulls out a knife. Unlike the chainsaw from earlier, this was a very real and very sharp knife. In a taunting way, the masked men walk over slowly- one going to my left and the one with the knife going to my right. I begin to scream but it is quickly muffled by the man on my left covering my mouth. My anxiety takes over now, not able to take any more scares. I begin to see black slowly starting with my peripheral vision as it slowly covers the rest of my eyes. I begin to drift into unconsciousness. The last thing I head was the laughter of 4  recognizable guys and the muffled talking of Henry, Patrick, Vic, and Belch.

I woke up in my bed, the sun glaring down on my face. I sit up slowly, trying to remember how I even got here. Last thing I remember was being held down by those assholes in that terrifying motel room. I get out of bed and begin to stretch when I notice something hanging on my closet door. I hesitantly walked over to my closet seeing a note stuck to the door. The paper note was help up by a knife.. the same knife from last night! My breathing becomes shallow and hands shake as I read over the note. Still feeling jumpy, I jump when I hear Eddie’s and Richie’s loudmouths enter the front door. I bring my attention back to the note which reads~

I can’t get your screams or your scared face out of my mind. How about we try to recreate them in the bedroom? -Patrick

You’re my number one target now..scaredy-cat - Henry

[somewhatgreatexpectations]

Writing’s On The Wall (Wanda Maximoff/ Reader)

Hello, again! We’ve finally reached... Civil War! Loosely inspired by Sam Smith’s “Writing’s On The Wall”. Some of the actual dialogue from the film is used here with some adjustments. Let me know what you think.

Summary: How the reader and Wanda are involved in the events of Civil War. Will they be on the same side? Or will they have to fight each other?

“I want to feel love, run through my blood, tell me is this where I give it all up? For you I have to risk it all, 'cause the writing's on the wall”

Half a year had passed since you left the comfort of the Avengers tower and the path to healing had never felt more manageable. You should have known that wouldn’t last. Peace never seemed to last around you. 

You didn’t know what to expect when Fury called you out of the blue and told you to turn on the news, but it was certainly not what you saw. A quiet curse escaped your lips as you watched the news of what happened in Lagos play out before you.

For at least an hour you listened to them completely annihilate Wanda’s character and talk about her like she was a monster who couldn’t be controlled. A threat. That couldn’t have been further from the truth. She made a mistake – she was trying to help. You could only imagine how she was feeling.

The news continued to pile on the next couple of days which is when you caught wind of the Sokovian accords. The information being relayed to you in the form of a demand from one Tony Stark who said you needed to sign since you were technically still an Avenger. You told him you would need time to think about it because the fact of the matter was, you didn’t agree with it. Not that you actually told him the second part. 

Shortly after your phone call with Stark, Steve also reached out. Though he was reluctant to have to ask you for help when he knew what he would be dragging you back into. You agreed within seconds. Not only was it what was right, but Steve was your first lifeline. You’d always offer him help. You’d always stand by him. You had made a promise. That’s just who you were.

Due to some loose ends, you were the last to arrive at the parking garage Steve had designated as the meeting location. 

The sight of Wanda before you after all this time shocked you and rendered you immobile for a moment. 

As if she could sense your presence, she looked over and made eye contact with you, her eyes widening ever so slightly. You shook your head, you had healed – moved on. She wasn’t your focus anymore. The look in her eyes stuck with you though, it was something you had never seen before. You could feel her eyes follow you. Even after all this time, it slightly hurt you still.

Wanda, on the other hand, felt breathless at the sight of you. The one she thought she’d never get to see again. She could feel her heart beating so hard in her chest she was sure everyone in the area could hear it. It took everything in her not to run over to you, take you in her arms and never let go. Even after all this time, she missed you still. 

“Cap, what have you gotten yourself into now?” you questioned playfully, smiling brightly when Steve turned to look at you.

Despite the circumstance, Steve was genuinely glad to see you, to physically see how much better you looked after your time away rather than just hear it in a phone call. “Y/n. I hate how this is how we’re being reunited but it’s good to see you.” He pulled you into a tight embrace which you gladly returned. 

For the first time in her life, Wanda envied Steve Rogers. 

When he released you, Steve turned and addressed everyone else. “Alright everyone, go and get ready. Time is of the essence… And I can’t imagine they’re going to let us go easily.”

Before you could walk away, Steve threw a duffle bag at you with a wink before he walked off to put on his suit. You looked into the bag and noticed a sleek black outfit with blue and white accents. New gear, you thought to yourself, nice.

“Hi, Y/n.” you heard an all too familiar voice say softly from behind you. 

With only slight hesitation, you turned. “Hello, Wanda.” You greeted neutrally, proud of yourself for not feeling as broken as you once did at the mere sight of her. 

Wanda smiled slightly at you, her nerves at an all-time high from being this close to you once again. “I’m surprised to see you here. You look… good.” She said shyly. 

An amused smile spread over your lips. “Thanks. I thought I told you I’d always be on your side.” You said with a wink. The referenced conversation felt as though it had happened in another life. 

A pink hue covered her cheeks which you took note of curiously. “I’m actually glad you are.” She admitted honestly. “I’ve had a lot of time to think these last few months and it’s made me realize that I-“

“I’m genuinely sorry to do this, ladies, but we’ve really got to go.” Steve interrupted. Looking apologetically at Wanda who appeared disheartened.

You waved your hand dismissively. Allowing yourself to get invested in even just a conversation with Wanda wasn’t something you’d allow yourself. “Not an issue at all, Cap.” You replied lightly, pretending you didn’t see the way Wanda’s looked down dejectedly. In that moment you wished you didn’t know her so well.

Once you were all gathered, Steve separated you all into teams that would be spread throughout the airport, Clint and Wanda would be together, Sam would stay with Bucky and you would be with Steve. Scott would be waiting in hiding for when the perfect opportunity presented itself. Without knowing all the variables, it was difficult to form a perfect plan, but you all worked with what you had. Once that was settled, it was time to get into position. 

“Y/n.” Wanda took hold of your hand as you were turning to leave. “Do you think we could finish that conversation later, whenever that may be?” She asked hopefully. You took note of how she was holding her breath.

“Sure, Wanda.” You eventually replied, watching the way she breathed out graciously. “I’ve got to get into position now though, Steve is already out there.” 

Wanda lightly squeezed the hand that you hadn’t realized she was still holding. Awkwardly, you pulled it away. A short look of disappointed flashed across her features. “Be careful out there, okay?”

“You too.” You replied neutrally, this conversation was veering into dangerous territory. With one final nod you took off in a sprint to get into position, not seeing the way Wanda stayed behind for a moment. 

Even just the minor action made her aware of the fact that you’d changed, you used to always look back. She looked at your retreating figure with worried eyes until it disappeared from sight.

Almost as soon as you got into position, you could hear Sam begin calling you over the coms. “Y/n, go out to Steve, give them some numbers. Remember your points and the mission.”

“Haven’t been out of the game that long, Wilson.” You replied with an eye roll before heading out to where Steve was trapped.

The end of Tony’s speech caught your attention. “… in Clint, rescuing Wanda from a place she doesn’t even want to leave, a safe place-“ His words halted as you came to a stop by Steve’s side.

For a moment Tony just looked between you and Steve, obviously surprised to see you there. “And you brought the kid back into the chaos for this? To make her a criminal? Real nice, Rogers.” Tony quipped angrily.

Steve opened his mouth to respond when you beat him to it. “I can speak for myself, thanks. Hi Tony, good to see you again.” You matched his sarcasm with a mocking wave of your fingers. “If it means I can fight for what’s right then I’ll gladly join the fray again.”

“You heard her.” Steve replied with a small chuckle. 

Wanda couldn’t help but watch you with a small smile of admiration from her position. She truly missed being able to see this version of you. Always determined to do what was right. Clint shook his head in amusement at her but didn’t say anything.

From your place you could see Tony’s frustration grow as he addressed Steve again. “I’m trying to keep you from tearing the Avengers apart.”

“You did that when you signed.” Steve replied coolly.

Tony looked away before looking back at Steve, his anger more present. “Alright, we’re done. You’re going to turn Barnes over and you’re going to come with us. Now. Because it’s us.” He paused slightly. “C’mon…” he added, and you almost felt bad for Tony.

Over your coms you could hear Sam let you both know that he had found the quinjet. That’s when chaos ensued. Your focus was keeping Rhodey back from Steve when you saw Tony begin shooting at Wanda and Clint, with a flick of your wrist Rhodey sunk into the floor, completely encased in the concrete that was once flat underneath his feet. 

The sound of his suit slowly chipping away at the defense let you know that it wasn’t too damaging as you began running towards Tony, using your powers to propel you forward. That was until a truck got thrown right in your path and exploded mere inches from you. You ducked and rolled, jumping back up. “C’mon.” you mumbled to yourself. Noticing the red wisps that surrounded you during the explosion.

You made eye contact with Wanda, who’s eyes were worried as she lowered her hands, the red wisps that were lingering around you fading. You nodded in thanks, Wanda just quirked her lips up and nodded back.

“Sorry!” Scott said sheepishly to you over coms. 

You refocused and noticed the path to the quinjet clear for you all, each of you sprinting in its direction. 

The quinjet was quickly approaching as each of you sped up even more until a beam of light cut into the ground before you, effectively stopping you all in your tracks. 

“For the collective good, you must surrender now.” Vision said, his eyes on Wanda whose expression never changed. Each member of Tony’s team formed a defensive line in front of the jet. 

Both sides were in a stand-off, and it was obvious neither was willing to back down. “What do we do, Cap?” you questioned. 

“We fight.” Steve said without a moment of hesitation, determination clear in his eyes as he began running forward. Everyone else followed suit, both teams clashing in the middle.

The scene was so frenzied, and your focus was on fighting Tony with your powers that it wasn’t until Sam spoke over coms that you focused in again. You easily agreed with the plan that not all of you could make it out. It had to be Steve and Bucky. 

The sound of Wanda’s scream distracted you, thankfully Scott had also distracted Tony just in time. 

“Wanda!” You shouted on reflex already beginning to run over when you saw her fall to the floor, clutching her head. You were able to catch the building that was falling on Steve and Bucky with your powers for a moment before allowing it to crash down behind them. 

When you turned your attention back to Wanda, you noticed Vision come to a stop beside her and take her in his arms. The conversation between them looked intimate. She looked up from her place in his arms for a moment and met your eyes. Her eyes looked as though they were trying to convey something to you when they had suddenly gone wide as you felt a strong force make contact with your head then everything went black. 

When you finally came to your head felt groggy and achy, the way it did when Hydra used to run experiments on you. You tried to lift a hand to rub at your head when you noticed resistance and something cool around your neck. Out of confusion, your eyes shot open only to feel anxiety seep into your bones when you took note of the straight jacket that you were confined in and the collar locked uncomfortably around your neck.

“Hello?” you called, hating the way fear crept into your voice.

“Y/n. You’re awake.” You heard Wanda respond, relief obvious in her voice. You looked around for a moment trying to locate her voice when you finally noticed her across a brightly lit circular sort of area, in her own straight jacket and collar. Her eyes that were so bright before the battle now dull.

Fruitlessly you tried to use your powers to manipulate the walls of the cell to no avail. “Where are we?”

“They call it the raft.” You heard Clint’s bitter voice float through the walls. “We’re criminals now.”

The anxiety you felt began to overwhelm you as flashes of being tied up in a similar manner and watching someone you loved be harmed went through your mind. “How long have we been here?”

“Three days,” Wanda began hesitantly almost as if she wasn’t sure if she wanted to tell you more. 

Clint interrupted her. “They’ve been knocking you out each time you come to, even for a second. First, they doped you up. The last time they just hit you. They’re not big fans of Steve over here, you’re the closest they could get to him.” Anger was clear in his words. 

You thought you heard him mumble something about putting Wanda directly across from you, so she’d be forced to watch. 

Wanda looked resigned with purple bruising under her eyes. You were hesitant to ask. “What happened to you?” she shook her head.

Thankfully Sam answered for her. “They’re not big fans of her either. The one good thing Tony did was stop what they were doing to both of you.”

Before you could ask anything else, the sound of the door opening caught your attention, all of your attention it seemed. A moment later, Steve walked in, a relieved smile on his face as he took in each of you. 

“About time.” Sam said gruffly.

Without hesitation Steve began taking you each out of your cell and loaded onto the jet he had waiting. 

You were watching the prison shrink in the distance from the safety of the quinjet when you felt someone take a seat next to you. You didn’t need to look to know who it was.

“Do you think we can have that talk now?”

Part 8! Don’t worry there’s more to come, I’m just releasing one title ahead at a time. This part was semi-difficult to write because I didn’t want to add too much of the fight scene because then it would be extremely long and this was more of a set-up chapter for Wanda and the readers story. To establish where they are after separating and bring them back into each others lives. Anyway, as always, hope you all enjoyed! Comments and thoughts always welcome. :) (bonus points if you can tell me what part was referenced in this chapter ;)

[deepseavibez]

Blindspot || KTH

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-> Picture Source - Pinterest

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Blindspot [Taehyung x Reader]

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Genre - Best Friend; Fear of the Future; Nighttime Memories; Mixed Feelings;

Summary - She believed in more. In better. In bigger. That life was out there waiting to be grabbed with both hands. He's made it his sole purpose to remind her that simple moments were beautiful and meant to be enjoyed... and maybe, she would realize he was one of them.

Warning - (Slight) Angst; Anxiety; Unsure feelings; Fear of the Future; Fluff; Comfort;

Word Count - 4.7k

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🎶 - I'm Fine - BTS

TAE

‘Tae.’

‘Y/n?’ He pulled the phone away from his ear and looked at the time, ‘it’s 3am babe.’

‘... I'm sorry for waking you. Sorry. Go back to sleep, it's okay.’

‘Hey, no, no, I'm awake.’ Sitting up, he switched the phone to his other hand and rubbed at his eyes, ‘What's going on.’

‘It’s not important, I swear,’ he could hear her trying to mask her shakiness over the phone. ‘You can go back to sleep.’

He wouldn’t call her out on lying. He knew better than anyone when y/n was in a bad way. Once he asked her, specifically him, what was wrong, she would crumble and he wasn’t there to catch her right now. ‘Y/n. Come on, talk to me.’

‘I can't sleep.’

‘Yeah, no shit,’ he yawned back.

‘I'm so sorry for waking you.’ He could hear the trepidation in her voice.

‘You know better than to apologize for something like that, ‘ he chastised. ‘Babe, tell me about it. Was it a bad dream? Something keeping you up?’

----------

Y/N

You could hear shuffling over the phone as you searched for an answer. It was hard to put certain emotions into words. You only knew you needed to phone Tae, regretting it too late, when he actually answered. ‘I'm not sure,’ you started awkwardly, ‘I guess. I just don't know where I'm going.’

‘Do you plan on leaving me anytime soon?’ Already pulling your leg, he got you to roll your eyes.

‘No, of course not. I just mean, like, metaphorically.’

Things were a bit...confusing right now.

It had been a long time since you last had to deal with emotions this strong. The voices, getting harder to ignore. You had enough outside negativity to deal with, like family and some friends, all having this certain expectation from you.

It was new for you to rebel, to be who you wanted to be and feel how you wanted to feel without consequences. Choosing a life you solely strived toward, negating the tiny voice in your head saying you were wasting time and you were running out of time and you were not enough.

‘I don't know what I want to do, Tae!’ You burst out, the build up too long, the burden too heavy. ‘I don't have plans. I have a great job, I do. But I don't want to be a PA for the rest of my life and I don't know where to start, where to look, how to choose what I want to do.

I don’t have it figured out, it hasn’t fallen onto my lap, and when I look, I feel like I’m going to waste even more time looking.’

‘Y/n, you know you have a lot more figured out than you give yourself credit for.’ The huskiness of his sleep-leaden voice, comforted you. ‘You have money, a routine stable job, you've worked you way through university and graduated with honors.’ Taehyung did it without effort and he knew you would hear his gruff tone above all others, in a crowd, in a panic, as a voice of reason.

‘I know, and I keep trying to remind myself of that, but it’s just become unbearable. I am running out of time.’ Struggling to remain composed you spoke into the phone as if he was right here, ‘What if I'm still here in ten years, Tae? What if I don't ever figure out my purpose? What if I'm meant to just work and then die? I haven't lived! I haven’t seen the world. I’ve made everyone proud and now I’m the black sheep. I prefer it, It's just-,’

The sound of keys jangling cut you off.

‘Tae,’ you asked tentatively, confusion evident.

‘Hmm.’

‘What are you doing?’ You asked when he provided no further explanation.

‘Are you in pj's right now?’

‘Uh,’ you looked down at your white vest and underwear, just to make sure, ‘yeah, why?’

‘Miss y/n, I didn't know you slept in the nude.’

The protests left you immediately at his teasing, slithering heat under your skin at the very notion. ‘Tae! I am not sleeping in the nude, I have underwear on.’

‘Uh huh, what color are they?’ Your cheeks flamed in embarrassment. You could imagine his smirk, that dumb cocky, arrogant smirk.

He laughed, the sound gruff, infuriating you more, and causing you to giggle back. Because you were the butt of the joke, and you liked his laugh too much. Trying to be mad at him, even when play-fighting or harmless bantering, Taehyung, not a chance.

‘Listen,’ a seriousness settling between you, ‘get dressed, just sweatpants, and a shirt.’

‘Wait, what, why,’

‘Baby, listen for once. Just get dressed and give me five minutes.’

You looked at the blank screen, stunned. Your brain stuck at the word baby, and the effect it had. Your insides were mush, anxiety mollified, despite not knowing what he was about to do next.

‘Babe’, you knew, ‘babe’, you understood, that was normal, routine, best friend. But Baby?

You mulled over it as you discarded your vest, and threw on a loose Celine shirt. Pulling on your black sweats, a pair of socks and air force ones because who knows what this boy was up to, you stopped. You sniffed, once, twice, yep, that was Taehyung’s body wash, but what - oh, you tugged the loose collar toward your nose, yep, this was Tae’s shirt.

You composed yourself, almost deadpan at the small realization. When had he even stripped in your room and why weren’t you there.

Wrapping your messy hair into a bun, you restrained your mind from wandering further.

Your phone beeped from the bed and the screen lit up, a message popping up. ‘Look out your window.’

Peeping out you saw his black Jeep in your driveway. He popped his head out of the driver’s side window and did a two finger salute.

Shaking your head with a smile, you grabbed your phone and made your way downstairs through the house and out the front door.

‘What are you doing here,’ you asked as soon as he came into view. He looked good, white tee, black sweatpants, you matched, except for his leather jacket and red bandana.

He opened the passenger door on your side and leaned back, giving you a once over. His lips twitched as he rested his eyes on the shirt you wore. If you didn’t know any better, you’d think he wanted you in his shirt. You raised your eyebrow playfully, refusing to give life to something like butterflies and heart-eyes when your best friend stood in front of you. Life was complicated enough.

‘You needed me to show up.’ He said it a matter-of-factly, but you knew he wanted to be there for you and you couldn’t, not feel grateful, and a little warm, that he would get into his car drive to you, all because you needed him to.

Not waiting for you to reply, he threw a jersey at you. ‘Its cold,’ his tone left no room for protest and he cocked his head toward the jeep, a sign to get in.

You wrapped it around you silently, not moving, not yet.

‘Well,’ his thumb curled around the top of the steering wheel as the rest of his fingers straightened out, his freehand rising to follow his question, ’Come on, get in.’

‘Where are we going?’ You would have gotten in, you would probably end up wherever he was going to take you anyway, but where was the fun in doing everything obediently. Even puppies had wild streaks.

He raised his eyebrow this time, a smirk teasing his cheek, 'You're brave every night, y/n. But not tonight, not while you're with me, come, trust me, wherever we go I'll keep you safe.'

You turned to close and lock the front door, breathing out slowly, as slow and low as you could, doing your best to work on the constriction around your heart; his words too wiry, too strong, too genuine to forget, too deep to ignore. It made you so... agreeable.

Getting into the Jeep, you felt different as you sat here now, in a seat you had been in too many times to count. It was probably the time and the circumstances. Yeah, some shifts were just because of the time, and the air and because it was silent and the dead of night.

You said nothing more, even though a few minutes earlier you spoke into the phone like you would explode if you couldn’t get the words out fast enough, you would be alone in your head, if you weren’t able to make him understand.

You jumped slightly, as you felt his hand close over yours, and pull it toward him to brush his lips along your knuckles. It was an absent action, maybe, because he stared straight ahead, didn’t spare a glance at you as you stared at the side of his head, making it look like he wasn’t even aware he was doing what he was doing.

Swallowing against the pounding of your heart, you chalked this up too. Night time was vulnerable, everyone was just a little more sensitive, you didn’t have to make it more than it needed to be.

Looking out the window you noted the lights and dark windows, empty parks and streets, doing your best to ignore the heat against your hand, the breath against your knuckles, lips not very far away, that were capable of a lot more.

With some effort, you faded out the intensity of his actions, and as your eyes adjusted you saw familiar figures, and buildings you had driven past numerous times. You knew where you were going.

He pulled up in the parking lot of his safe haven. In retrospect, your safe place should be entirely different, but you were safe with Tae, that said, his peace was where you found yours.

Jumping out of the Jeep, you noted how dark and looming the two story building looked. A huge sign reading 'Blindspot' the only posh part about this place, black metal roller doors, spray painted names across the walls, some of the neon colors standing luminescent against the moonless night.

One would think it was graffiti, but the community knew better, the ones that came and went, some that stopped and never left, knew having your name on the wall was a privilege.

He jumped out too, after grabbing something from the back. Carrying it toward you, you noted his knapsack, and a box of some sort.

Handing it over to you to hold, you took hold of them silently, as he pulled out the keys to open the locks and deadbolt.

You watched him, his actions purposeful but he was at home, knowing which way the locks turned, the catch on the bolt needing to be kicked out a certain way before opening fully; he'd done this a thousand times before.

Lifting up the shutters, the noise too loud for the silent night, he opened the door and guided you in, making you all too aware of his palm in the small of your back. Taking the stuff from your hand and throwing it onto the edge of the ring and he lifted up to close the shutters behind you.

You took notice of the extra shirt that falls out of the pile on the ring, one of your favorites of his actually, grey with black spots, sort of like a giant cookies and cream oreo mix.

The empty gym in front of you was a contrast to the busy days it had. There was a weight section, the bags lined up against the far wall hanging still, having no impact thrown at it to sway the dead weight, and the machines had their own floor upstairs, treadmills overlooking the balustrades to the floor below, by the ring where you stood.

The pool area, directly below you, in the basements where the changing rooms and showers could be found.

It looked small on the outside, but inside there were stories to be told, motivation, encouragement, brotherhood, friendships solidified in stone and a fair share of violent memories with broken bones, broken bonds and broken hearts.

Walls were packed with quotes, anatomy teachings and pictures, schedules, a dedicated to growing trophy case with medals and newspaper clippings, and pictures of staff, members, and the boss, with his best friend.

What Tae didn't continue, was the stereotype of the grunge masculine look that came with gyms. Outside may be black as night, but inside there was color everywhere - a world within.

The punching bags were each a different shade, green, red, yellow and blue. The ring bottom was black, neon orange ropes running along the sides in three consecutive lines, and your personal favorite, a giant pride flag hung on a hook outside his office door.

Toxic masculinity wasn't allowed in Taehyung's gym. You could be yourself, make your own lifestyle choices and still be a good fighter or just work-out. He took it upon himself to punch the teeth out of anyone that thought otherwise. This was what he'd always wanted to do and he made it more than just a place to get healthy.

There were four hours, two for the morning, two for the afternoon, catered only to women. Tae understood that men will be men, no matter how much you tried to change it. And comfort mattered.

Working out and exercising, as much as it seemed, like a chore, it could be enjoyable. It could be a social setting, helping people to open up, and cope, providing the best way for them to be themselves.

You helped him find a premises, helped him choose color schemes, and sat in on interviews. For legal purposes you were an advisor and owned a small share percentage. You didn't want it, but Tae insisted, you were especially grateful when the gym grew into more than you both had expected it to become.

'Y/n,' he waved his hand in front of your face, the action snapping you out of your thoughts.

'Huh, sorry, did you say something?'

He smiled comfortingly, 'Take the jacket off and your shoes.'

Scrunching your eyebrows, you finally asked, 'Tae, what are we doing here?'

'We are,' he started explaining as he ripped open a box in his hand, 'doing something I feel you need.'

Looking at you pointedly, he motioned his eyes to the jacket.

Shucking it off, you took off your shoes and redid your bun for good measure.

'It's strange isn't it,' you voiced out loud. He perked up at your food for thought, fingers fiddling with white tape. 'It's strange, that I know every corner of this place, but I haven't ever put a pair of gloves on.'

He raised his hand absently, a student raising his hand to give an answer, his gaze focused on yours as he did. 'That's because you've never had the need to, I'm here to protect you.'

Turning away, you caught yourself, before you let your heart show in your eyes. You've known Tae for so long, been his best friend for years, why now, why this feeling, this tightness in your chest.

You played it off, and walked over to him, socked feet padding against the wooden floor boards.

Taehyung clicking his tongue startled you out of your effort to feel normal; you found him staring at your socks.

'Y/n, I've told the guys this numerous times, you can't spar in the boxing section with socks. It's a slipping hazard.' No trace of the out of the blue romantic words, he bent down easily removing them from your feet one after the other.

It would be weird, if you weren't already so used to his skinship, his cuddling when he slept over, his hand straying over your shoulder on the couch, or brushing against your waist when he passed you. Yet, his thumb, on your ankle, his hand as he circled and held it, even for just the moment that he laid your foot down after taking off the sock, you felt… taken.

You wanted to snort, the wording completely off, I mean, he had a right over you, always had but-

He came into focus, looking up at you from where he sat, and asked lightly,' Do you wash these.'

Your mouth dropped open, as you watched him hold your purple socks in between two fingers, like it would bite him, or the smell would.

Your knee nudged at the side of his face playfully as you reached to pull him up. He took your socks, holding them properly now and put them in his bag, picking up the white tape he was fidgeting with earlier.

'So, will I be sparring with you today?' You were excited now. You had watched people vent and let themselves be free as they learned technique, let themselves be violent without consequences, the satisfaction on their faces after their sessions.

When he finally reaches you again he finds the catch and opens it out. White athletic tape, used to make arms and wrists stiffer, and to provide better grip, even with sweat and slick.

'No, not today. Let's focus on getting you worked up and tired. If you enjoy it, I'll gladly let you go toe to toe with me.' His eyes held a challenge, an underlying meaning evident.

Offering your hands up freely, he taped your wrists and fingers, you've seen him do it many times, just never on your wrists. Experimentally you shook out your fingers and bent and scrunched your wrist to allow for the right amount of tightness.

'Cocky, aren't you, Mr. Kim,' you side-eyed him.

He leaned into you, his breath teasing yours, 'I am the Coach here, y/n.' You blinked at the nervous fluttering in your chest, his intimidation, usually not directed so closely to you, doing something you couldn't explain, couldn't quite grasp.

Somehow, you should be scared, but it was, hot.

Leaning into him, breath for breath, you matched up, 'Then teach me.'

A slow smile broke out over his lips, playful Tae was back, it let you navigate things easier, you knew what to expect.

'So, I'm boxing the bag,' you deduced. 'I don't see why I need to tire myself out. I don't know how to do this.'

His palms closed over your cheeks, puffing your face up, emphasizing your pout. 'You are frustrated. You can't do anything about any of your emotions tomorrow, y/n. You have to be patient. You have to remind yourself it's a day at a time that gets you to your future. It will always be about patience.'

'Unfortunately, patience is overrated at something to 4am,’ you complained as he let go of your face and bent down to produce a new set of gloves from under the ring. Opening the zip of the bag, he pushed one toward you.

Shaking his head at your antics, not even phased, he strapped the gloves to both your hands and walked toward a bag. 'Come on, try it.'

'Color?'

'The yellow one.' He made to stand behind the bag you chose, and held either side of it, knees bent slightly in a defensive stance.

Feeling slightly out of place, and awkward, you huffed and punched the bag just to humor him.

You stared at it. The fucking thing didn't even move.

He burst out laughing at the comical look on your face.

'Okay, wait no,' he composed himself and came around you. His breath fanned your neck, giving you goosebumps, as he held your wrists and showed you how to punch. 'So straighten your elbow, like this, and pull it back in and see how the gloves are shaped, your forefingers curl above your thumb, so inside your glove your thumb shouldn't be in the fist.'

Nodding as you took in the new information, you did your best not to get distracted as he continued, all too comfortable in his element.

'When your wrist hits the bag don't curl it, let it face the impact head on. See, this is how you do it, so you don't break your wrist.' He made you punch the bag and showed you where your wrist was bending and how to keep it tight.

'Alright, baby,' that word, that goddamn word, 'you good to try again?'

Closing your eyes and swallowing hard, you nodded in answer and shook your head out of the Tae trance.

'Start with a simple combo this time, Jab, Jab, Uppercut, Hook.' You knew the names and their directions. Jab was straight forward, twice fast on the submissive hand as a set-up, the uppercut from downward into the abdomen or chin, depending, and the hook, from the dominant hand rounding off on the face.

'Think of it all y/n,' he encouraged, as he walked to his original position, 'the people, the words, the expectations, the beating up of yourself you do on a daily basis, and just go for it.'

Spreading your legs in a stance, aiming at the bag on his command, you clenched your fists and focused.

'Go'

----

'And breathe.'

Breathing heavily you fell flat to the floor, and stared up at the ceiling.

Sweat was in your eyes and your hair, but despite being in dire need of a shower, you felt oddly at ease. Tiny zings of exertion shot through your body as your lungs begged for air and you heard your blood rushing.

The roof was really pretty you thought, the wood positioned in long blocks to form and hold up the gable, grabbing your attention for the first time ever.

You blinked as Tae's face came into view, his hands resting on his knees.

He smirked cutely as he brushed your sweat slicked hair out of your eyes and off your face before reaching down to pick you up off the floor.

Handing you a water bottle, you let him manhandle you as he lifted your form to sit on the edge of the ring, launching himself up to sit next to, a second later.

'How do you feel?' He was proud of himself no doubt, after all, his plan did succeed.

You made a face at him, anyway.

'Hey,' he put both his hands up in mock surrender. 'It worked, didn't it.'

You cut him some slack, this time. 'Yeah, I feel icky, but definitely less worked up.'

---------

🎶 - Black Swan - BTS

TAE

Taking a swig of the water you had opened in your hand, he looks at the top of your head as he closes it and puts it away.

'Hey.'

She looks up at him, eyes hooded in exhaustion.

He smiles at her. Despite how much he loved her spitfire, she's adorable when she's not talking back.

He knew of the thoughts that crawled up her spine on a daily basis. He knew she had no plan, and it made her hyper that she didn't have one, but she couldn't make one because, what if she chose wrong.

He wanted to take care of her. He wanted to tell her that she could be whatever she wanted to be, and he would fly her across the ocean if she really wanted it; that she didn't need to worry about life so much because he would always take care of her.

'You're too sad.'

She scrunched her eyebrows at him.

'You have the whole weight of the world on your shoulders and you can't do anything about it.' He chose his next words carefully. 'I wish you could take a breather, and let a thought be a thought instead of picking it apart.'

He held up his hand to her when she made to protest.

'You know, things may not feel okay right now, with work, or at home, and in your head. But I've never seen someone adapt like you have. You bounce back, despite how much grit it takes.'

He took the gloves off her hand and carefully unwinded the tape on her fingers.

'I don't have answers y/n. But I do know you have me for a long time and I'm going to be here as you do your thing.'

Placing pressure on each finger he massaged the tightness out of it and flexed it for her.

'I don't know where you're supposed to go, if you were meant to leave and give me a round-the-world heartbreak, I'm not sure who you're supposed to be, I don't even know if you have a higher purpose, it wouldn't surprise me if you did, but you, y/n,' he heaved a sigh as he faced her, his gaze meeting hers, his next words the most important thing she'd need to remember,' you're a good you.'

As he met her eyes, her breath hitched. He heard it. He could see the flush in her face. He knew he was being honest. He knew he meant every word.

A half smile, a heavy acceptance, hands that were so easy to hold, eyes that were never anything but honest, a bond that all but forced a person to keep swimming. That was Taehyung to y/n. And that was y/n to Taehyung.

'You're a really, good you,' he reinforced. 'Right now, it works. I have a feeling it will work for a very long time.'

'I'm scared.' He could hear it in her voice. He heard it back when she was in her room too.

'Nothing is really set in stone, babe. And even though it does feel like you're running out of time, it's something you can't help. It's not what you want to hear but it's true.'

'How do I stop being sad?'

She was deflecting. But he had said it before, it wouldn't be gone tomorrow. Her anxiety and her fears, they will probably never go away.

She had the right way to go about it though. You get through it. Somehow. Some days it's a good cry, some days it's with a punching bag, and some days, it was with a best friend.

'See, now that's why you have me.' He answered confidently, as he put his chest out, his need to have her be okay, her smile, her laugh, his only intentions, his favorite thing these days.

'Oh really, you, why, because you're a clown.'

He feigned offense at the statement. 'Excuse me, I am not a clown, ask anyone that comes in for the 5am rush.'

She looked up at the clock in shock, it was really going half-four. She turned back to him sadly, 'I kept you up all night.'

'It was a fun night,' he replied, the teasing of many other ways to keep him up on the tip of this tongue, deciding against it, he looked away from her. 'You needed me, no amount of sleep is worth that.'

He didn't explain himself, he really didn't mind the lack of sleep. He could easily catch a nap in his office, or head home after half a day. But this, this moment with his best friend, that he wanted to be more, he knew he wouldn't choose to be anywhere else. He knew he'd do it over again too.

Pushing off the ring he grabbed the knapsack and handed her his shirt. 'Change out of that shirt, and use this one, you'll catch a cold, because of the sweat. And let's get you home, you need a hot shower, and sleep. I'll drop by for dinner after work too.'

Finally turning to her, he found she hadn't moved an inch, unshed tears in her eyes. Before he knew what he was doing, he pulled her toward him, sweat and all, and held her in his arms. 'You're first y/n, you'll always be first.'

A tender kiss on her head, his words rendering her speechless, and he knew uncharted waters were on the horizon.

This night, things that he'd said, the ways in which she responded, it was going to shift things for them.

But silence was comfortable for them. And she drank his share of coffee while he ate her share of pineapple, because he couldn't stand coffee and she hated pineapple. And he could hold her in his arms and she'd use his shirt while they slept.

It would start small, but he'd show her, the future was bright, she was deserving of more than she understood, she would be protected from her family and expectations and she would learn to remember, purpose or no purpose she wasn't alone, she never would be again.

[danganronpasurvivoraskblog]

Thinking with your fingers.

Shuichi, seriously, this isn’t necessary, I promise you.

I know. And I trust both you and Kuripa. I’m not coming because I want to stop you from getting hurt.

Even though I would very much like to stop you getting hurt...

I’m just coming because I want to see what kind of training Kuripa is putting you through.

And I’m fine with that, but you’d better not get in the way, or else I’m going to get angry. 

Alright, I’ll restrain myself.

*Shuichi tags along with Kaede as they go to meet with Kuripa for that night’s training.

Kuripa! Hey! I’m here!

Hm?

*Kuripa sits cross-legged on top of a boulder as he waits for Kaede to arrive.

Ah, so you are...

Still, wasn’t expecting the party. This a date?

N-No, I just-

came to see if I’m treating her right?

Well...something like that...I just want to know if this training is effective or not.

Well, I can tell you right now...It’s not.

Huh?

Wh-What?

Akamatsu...allow me to be frank with you.

As your mentor and as your friend...I don’t think you’re cut out for training with a sword.

Your body isn’t capable of swinging around a weapon as heavy as this without tripping over yourself. Furthermore, you can’t keep the right balance while using it, and considering you’re not in the same weight class as me...

Weight class? You mean I’m too light?

I can start eating bigger meals then!

That’s not gonna work. Whatever you eat won’t go to your muscles or frame. It’ll just go to your gut and best case scenario, your boobs.

Wh-What does that mean!?

Relax, it’s a joke. I’m just saying in this field of fighting...

You’ve definitely worked up enough muscle the last two weeks to be...at least a minor threat but...I don’t think you’ll ever be able to properly wield a weapon like a sword.

I...You’re...giving up on me?

I...Know that I wasn’t making much progress very fast but I figured...it’d only been a few lessons! Am I...really that hopeless...?

What gives!

*Shuichi gets in the way and squares up to Kuripa.

Shuichi?

So what, you’re just going to give up on her! No way am I allowing you to do that when you’ve already put her through this intense training that’s left her bruised and battered!

I refuse to let those tumbles be for nothing! I don’t care if it takes years for her to master it! One way or another, I demand that you see her training through!

Who are you to give me orders?

I’m...

I’m the Branch Chief of second branch! Shuichi Saihara! That’s who!

Shuichi...

...Heh!

What? Did I say something funny?

I’m proud of you kid. Since we first met, you’ve grown some backbone. Now I see why Togami picked you.

But you need to relax. I didn’t say I was going to give up on Akamatsu. I’m going to continue my end of the agreement and keep training her.

Huh!?

B-But you said that you weren’t going to teach me how to use a sword!

Yes! I’m not going to teach you how to use a sword.

*Kuripa turns his back.

But you know, we DO have OTHER options.

Other options?

Case in point...

*Kuripa walks back over to the rock, reaches down, and picks up what looks to be a long stick.

What...is that?

See for yourself. Catch!

Waah!

*Kaede hurriedly catches the stick. Upon closer inspection, she sees that it’s pointy at one end.

Wait...is this?

I was thinking about something.

*Kuripa leans on the rock and holds his head in his hand.

The reason why I know sword-fighting techniques is because I’m self-taught. Most of my moves and styles come from anime that I’ve watched and worked on. It’s a cool way that I implement my talent into my fighting.

You’re a pianist, and thus sword-fighting can’t really be referenced or carried over. But when I thought about it that way, I realized that if we wanted you to fight at your best, we were gonna have to utilize a pianists strongest asset.

Which is...?

Their fingers.

So, I found a pretty hefty, but long enough branch, and fashioned a makeshift polearm out of it.

A polearm is like a spear, right?

Same concept. But a spear is something you prod, while a polearm is more like...a sword on the end of a stick.

Hm...

*Kaede holds the stick and opens up her palm, allowing the weapon to balance. 

It’s pretty light...and easy to hold...

If I may...

Sure...

*Kuripa approaches Kaede and positions her arms and legs in a proper pose.

One thing I would recommend you do is take up some kind of acrobatics lessons. That way, you can whirl the weapon around your body and confuse and intimidate your opponent by not letting them know where you’re going to strike them.

*Kuripa paces himself back again and turns to face Kaede, drawing his sword and facing her.

Why don’t we give it a test run? 

Huh? You’re fighting now? But-!

Don’t worry Shuichi. That’s just how it is.

We start with the practical stuff so we know exactly what weak spots we need to work on.

Remember what I told you before. Don’t be afraid to utilize the rest of your body in a brawl, and don’t rely exclusively on the weapon.

If you see an opportunity to punch or kick me with a free hand or foot, go ahead.

Right!

...Would you do the honours?

Huh? Uh...ok...

*Shuichi rightfully takes a step back.

Uh...3!

2!

1!

Go!

Hah!

*Kaede rushes forward, but very nearly stumbles over as she thrusts the weapon towards Kuripa.

Hup!

Gah!

*Instead of attacking her in retaliation, Kuripa moves out the way and sticks his foot out, causing Kaede to eat dirt.

Well? How’d it feel?

I was...surprised...When I was using the sword, I didn’t move that fast.

The polearm is lighter than the sword, which means that it doesn’t take as much effort to carry. Your muscles and brain are still used to holding the sword handle. Get back up, and try and get used to your newfound speed and agility.

And also be careful. You’re faster now, but in exchange for speed, the attacks are lighter and have a more limited range.

This weapon is different than a sword, but hopefully it should be more useful to you.

*Kuripa helps Kaede up.

Alright! Let’s go again! Come at me!

Right!

Yagh!

Hup!

*Kaede thrusts the spear at Kuripa, and just about grazes his face.

Use your environment! Get the advantage over your enemy in any way you can!

Huaah!

*Kaede runs and bounds off the boulder, getting above Kuripa and swinging downwards.

That’s it! That’s it! Keep that up!

Woah!

Gah!

Ugh!

*Despite her mobility using the polearm, Kuripa is still able to get some hits on Kaede. However, she is able to get equally as many on her.

Yaaah HAH!

*Kaede allows the pole to dance between her fingers as she moves around, and then thrusts forward.

!!

*She misses Kuripa’s face by a few centimeters as he catches the spear with his free hand.

*pant!* *pant!* *pant!*

Alright. That’s enough for now.

Hahaha! I was hoping you’d say that!

*Kaede collapses.

Kaede!

*Shuichi rushes up to her.

Are you alright!?

Yeah, I’m ok. That...was the most exhausted I’ve been in a while...

But...it felt pretty great.

Aside from your tiredness, how’d you feel?

You know...my muscles feel a bit sore, but...I think my bruises are actually pretty light today.

Well, I admit, I held back a little, but only because we’re still getting used to the new digs.

I think a weapon in this style would be more suited to you, and with the way you were zipping around, I think I was right.

Yeah...I mean, we can keep going with this? See how things turn out.

Deeefinitely. But for now, I think you’ve earned a bath and a rest. I’ll see you the day after tomorrow, ok?

Alright! Thank you for not giving up on me Kuripa!

As if!

Thanks Kuripa. Sorry I doubted you.

No problem man. You should probably get a bath and a rest too since you came out all this way.

In fact...

*Kuripa puts his arm around both of them.

If you kids are in the mood to bathe together tonight, then maybe I can overlook the rules and allow you two into the same bathroom, just this once?

Gah!? 

N-No need! That won’t be necessary!

Aw c’mon! See an opportunity and seize it!

That’s quite alright!

Fine. Goodnight you guys.

*Kuripa watches the two return to the cabin, both with happy, and slightly flustered looks on their faces.

And somehow the big brother role makes sense.

Heh. Come on, those two are so easy to tease. Like I said, see an opportunity and seize it...and they leave themselves open a lot.

Speaking of which...thanks Harukawa. Your guidance really helped.

It’s alright. So long as Kaede’s not going to struggle anymore.

Hehe...You know, I definitely see Mukuro in you. That’s enough to garner my respect.

Don’t compare us...

Ok...Sure...But it’s kinda hard...

A lot of you kids really remind me of people I know and love. You and Mukuro...and Shuichi reminds me a lot of boss; easily nervous but always willing to take a stand...

And Kaede?

Hm...well, my sister I guess.

Oh...

I’m just saying, it makes me wanna protect you.

Then I’ll hold you to that.

[anotheranimestan]

Kiss Drought

Jealous Aizawa smut + possessiveness

NSFW!! Please note y/n is of age here!!

wc: 3.9k

Since my last Aizawa post is my most successful one (I am happily surprised) it only made sense to make my first smutty post for him 🤤

Perched on a barstool playing with the straw in your drink, you were waiting for your date to show. Being late wasn’t completely out of the ordinary for Shouta Aizawa but you were missing him badly tonight. Impatient since you hadn’t been able to see him for a few days. Somehow you’d convinced him to join you for a night out at this bar. You’d spent hours getting ready out of pure excitement. Putting on your sluttiest dress and lingerie to make it worth his while.

You settled yourself at the end of the bar, secluded where the lights didn’t reach and few people were. Aizawa hated being in the spotlights. Excited to see if you all done up for him had the intended effect, your eyes were glued to the door. Your hopes getting crushed every time another person walked in that wasn’t him.

“Hey.” A voice projecting over the music tore through your concentration. You jumped to find a tall burly guy with spiked hair and an over-confident smile leaning against the bar next to you.

You didn’t respond. Just stared at him in pure confusion. Surely you didn’t look like you wanted anyone to talk to you.

“How’s your night going?” He persisted.

“Fine.” You said curtly.

“That’s good. I saw you hiding back here from across the way there and I told my bud ‘I just have to go say hi to that smoking chick.’”

You grimaced. A master at flattery.

“So what’s your name?” He continued, not picking up on any of your social cues.

You gave him the stupidest fake name you could think of on the spot.

“Ah. Of course a hot girl has a hot name.”

You nodded in agreement. Listening to him was killing your brain cells.

“You look familiar you know....wait. You’re one of those pros from the next town over aren’t you.”

You nodded. Surprised he had the mental capacity to recognize smaller heroes like yourself.

He scoffed, proud of himself. “I knew it. Lady heroes are always hot.” Dear god someone get him away. “You know I could have gone pro myself.”

“Oh yea?” You replied doubtfully.

“Yeaaaa. But you know, I figured better not. Villains would have a hard time against me.” He joked. He raised his bicep and winked at you. Clearly about to show off whatever pitiful power-up quirk he was so proud of.

But his confident smile fell as you stared at him waiting to get his little show over with. His face contorted into horror. Realizing he couldn’t power-up.

“Ah. That’s weird.” He said unable to comprehend what was happening. But you were pretty sure you knew what was up.

“Aw honey it’s okay.” You cooed. “Sometimes alcohol makes it hard for guys to...you know...get things working.” You gave him your best fake smile. Highly amused by his ego shattering.

“Excuse me.” He sputtered and ran to the restrooms in humiliation.

You chuckled to yourself as you watched him nearly crying when he disappeared behind the bathroom door.

Suddenly you sensed a presence looming behind you.

“I figured you were somewhere nearby.”

You turned in your seat to find sleepy midnight eyes focused on you under a few loose strands of silky black hair. He had his hair tied back just the way you liked it and he hadn’t shaved in a few days so the stubble on his chin completed his signature look. He was so fucking handsome. You’d missed him so much.

“Sorry I’m late...” His gravely voice sounded like he just woke up. “but you look amazing.” He said sweetly soaking you in.

Forgiveness wasn’t even necessary. You immediately melted any time he was in the room. It was effortless the way he could snatch you up.

“That wasn’t very nice of you, Eraserhead.” You teased with a raised eyebrow. Already succumbing to his gravity that always seemed to pull you in.

He immediately knew you weren’t referring to his tardiness. “I have no idea what you’re talking about.” He lied with a little smile playing on his lips. Looking down as he felt your finger which was tracing the line down the center of his chest that was deliciously exposed by his partially unbuttoned button-down shirt. It wasn’t fair how he always looked so effortlessly sexy.

“I think he just wanted to be friends. No need to be jealous.” You cooed, knowing it was going to swirl up emotions in him that he was definitely going to deny. A little payback for being late.

He leaned down to your level. You held your lips dangerously close to his. Waiting for him to kiss the honeyed words off your tongue, despite the impatient desire growing in your chest. He always liked to make you wait. It gives him satisfaction knowing you’re stubborn enough to hold out for him to make the first move. Few people are more stubborn than himself. He always found that impressive about you. That and the way you were so good at baiting him.

“I don’t think I need to be jealous about that...situation.” He was willing to bite tonight.

“And why not?” You pretended to pout, tugging on his shirt with your ring finger for him to come closer and close the gap.

He considered his next move. Well aware that you were ready to pounce on any weak response.

“I can tell by the way you’re looking at me right now.” The edge of his lips tilted up. Knowing he had you cornered.

You growled, biting your lip. He came ready tonight. You hated when he smirked like that. Like he’d won. Even if it did make him look incredibly sexy.

“That’s very bold of you.”

“Am I wrong?”

He finally ended his touch drought and caressed your delicate jaw. So distracted by him quenching your thirst you’d forgotten to respond. You just sat there hanging on to his every movement. Entranced by the way he was admiring the color of your mouth.

His thumb grazed the center of your plump bottom lip. Dragging it down to watch the way it cushioned under his pressure.

He chuckled when you stuck your tongue out as he traced. Licking the pad of his thumb and then wrapping your pretty lips around it.

“I’ll take that as a no.” He said with a smug grin.

Somehow you went from being the cat to being his mouse.

“You are cruel.” You pouted. Begging him with your eyes to end this torture and kiss you.

It made him smile, with strange satisfaction knowing you’re too hard-headed to just ask for what you wanted. A sadist at heart. But you were so adorable when you were like this.

He answered your unspoken plea. “How about I buy you a drink first.” Deciding to hold out on you. Not ready to end this game you started quite yet.

You huffed.

“Someone beat you to it. Early bird gets the worm I guess.” You gestured to the glass of dark liquor sitting on a coaster next to you, knowing damn well you’d bought it for yourself. But you weren’t going to let him get away with this treatment.

He gave you a skeptical look.

“What? Does that bother you baby?” You pressed. You’d get him to admit it one day.

He paused. “Again, not that concerned considering you didn’t drink any of it.” You realized you hadn’t even taken your first sip yet.

Fuck. It’s like he was running on a full nights rest or something.

He slid the glass out of your hand. Disposing it just in case someone actually had tried to buy his girl a drink. Waving the bartender down he ordered your favorite, which he’d memorized a long time ago. A move no other man in this bar could attempt to pull.

“Wow. My favorite drink. Are you trying to impress me or something?” You asked with a cocked brow.

He smirked as he handed over his card to open a tab. You knew exactly the kind of power move he was pulling.

This flicker of his competitive side sent a surge of tingles between your legs which were currently spread on either side of Aizawa’s jeans. After a few days without him you were already longing for him. This was making it worse. You found yourself pressing your thighs together, which didn’t go unnoticed.

His voice was so deep and his tongue lazy when he spoke. You could practically feel the vibrations of his vocal chords right now, just like when they moaned into your mouth. The yearning for him was growing deeper in the pit of your stomach. But he was set on stringing you along. Punishment for teasing him about another guy.

“Here.” He placed the lightly a dewed drink in your hands, ice clinking against the glass. His fingers grazing yours sent another wave of frustration through you as you pictured them caressing your skin.

You’d run out of quips and were feeling tongue-tied. Focusing on the growing swirls of sensations that were beginning to dampen your black lace thong, Aizawa’s favorite.

Aizawa took some long draws of his drink while watching you sip in yours. Eyes intent on your lips wrapped around that straw. The tensing of your delicate throat as you swallowed. Picturing your pink tongue lapping the pad of his thumb again.

He finally sat down on the other bar stool. His knees parting to give himself room for the pressure you were stirring between his legs.

You prodded him with some questions about work. But he was being awfully quiet. He only half-heartedly answered your questions.

Getting a fuller view of you now he was too distracted. His body temperature rose at the tightness of your dress against your body. Your exposed neckline hinting at the fullness of your breasts underneath. Your legs looking smooth and long in that dress that stopped only a few inches below your ass.

Irritation flashed through Aizawa’s skin as, over your shoulder, he saw the guy emerge from the bathroom and look directly at him. He had started walking in your direction, like he was coming back for seconds, before he noticed you were with another man. He hadn’t been that bothered when he first arrived but now he felt his rarely-seen temper flaring up at the thought of this guy trying to make a move on you.

You were mid-sentence when you saw Aizawa’s jaw clench. His irritation fueled the fire that was blazing in your lower stomach. He only got that possessive look in his eye over one thing. You.

You had to shift in your chair to try and ease the throbbing under your dress. Desperately trying to distract yourself if you were going to be able to hold out against Aizawa’s punishment drought.

You were going to need a few shots to pull it off. Pulling your dress down, unsuccessfully trying covering your butt, you stood up to wave the bartender down.

Aizawa flinched, the tightness in his pants growing after seeing the curve of your ass peeking out under your dress. His body went up in flames however when he caught muscle man catching a look as well. Temper properly stoked, he was hellbent at letting this guy know he could go fuck himself.

You felt Aizawa snatch your wrist and pull you between his legs. Yelping at the abrupt movement, you stabled yourself from tripping over your heels on his crotch, accidentally, and felt the lump that had formed there.

“What are you doing?” He growled in your ear.

“I’m...ordering another drink?” You said confused.

“I’m the only person who’ll be ordering your drinks for the rest of the night.” He informed you warmly, giving your ass a squeeze before resting his hand over the exposed part. “What do you want babe?” He cooed when the bartender arrived.

He ordered four shots of your favorite tequila.

Your arms draped around his shoulders as he held you in his domain. One arm relaxed on the bar, the other territorially holding you against him.

As you both downed the shots you noticed him glaring at something every few seconds under hooded eyes.

“What are you looking at?” You said leaning forward.

“Nothing important.” He growled through a clenched jaw.

But you’d followed his eye-line to find the man from earlier at the other end. You grinned in satisfaction.

A devious streak surged through you. Excited to see how your man would react to you now.

“I thought you weren’t jealous.”

His dick twitched at your hand brushing over his jeans.

“I’m not.”

“Well it seems like he’s bothering you. Want me to go over there and have a few words with him for you babe?”

He chuckled. “I don’t think you want to try something like that.”

“I think I might.”

He downed his last shot, the alcohol starting to buzz in his head. He was struggling to keep his temper under control. You were really testing him, on purpose too which made it worse. But he knew how you worked and how to press your buttons.

“Then go do it.” He urged. Releasing his hold on you. Holding his arms up in the air.

You huffed. Wrapping your arms around him even tighter. You hated when he did that. He knew you wouldn’t go. And you hated even more when he took his hands off you.

“You’re so mean.” You whined.

He chuckled. “I’m sorry baby. But you really think I’d let you win this little teasing game of yours so easily?” You yelped when his hand came down heavy on your ass again. Jutting your hips onto his hardened boner. “Unless you’re trying to tell me I have an actual reason to be jealous.” He dared you, looking you directly in the eyes.

He had you cornered again. His little mouse. You couldn’t even pretend to admit that another man caught your eye. And the throbbing in your panties was unbearable now. You were dying to smash your mouth on his.

You whimpered as he swept your hair from your neck. His lips only grazing your skin as he whispered into your ear. “You can tell me the truth baby.” He cooed.

You were barely holding out against him. Your stubbornness was seconds from giving out. His deep voice in your ear had you dripping. You crossed your legs trying to hold yourself together but Aizawa wasn’t about to let that happen.

“Come here.” He instructed as he lifted your leg over his knee so that you straddled his thigh. The pressure against your throbbing sex eliciting a soft moan.

He gave one more glance at the pathetic guy from earlier who was visibly tense. Having to watch you perched on his lap. Wilting over him in submission.

Suddenly you were very thankful you were tucked away where few people could possibly notice you melting over him, a mess.

“So? Should I be jealous?” He placed his final chess piece.

You whimpered more as his hand guided your hips to grind against him. Your stubbornness snapped.

You shook your head no into the crook of his neck. Your pussy started convulsing, desperately wanting him to touch you.

“Say it.”

“No baby. There’s no one to be jealous about. Nothing.”

You whined into his ear pressing your lips against him.

He groaned in satisfaction at hearing you admit it.

He shifted his leg to stretch out your stance. Your knee hooked over his thigh, exposing you so he had full access. The cold air hitting your drenched underwear made your breath hitch.

His thumb massaged the inside of your thigh, causing your hips to buck in anticipation. It was killing you.

“Please Shouta. Stop teasing me.” You whined.

You licked your lips which were painfully dry from lack of kisses.

The gloss of your saliva on your lips made his mouth water.

“You look so pretty.” He said grazing the outside of your drenched panties with one finger.

You bit back a moan that was surely going to be so loud everyone at the bar was going to hear.

“Fuck. You’re so wet...all this for me?” He said hanging his head back as he fought the urge to throw you onto the bar and ram his dick into you. Right where muscle man could see.

Another soft moan from you brought him back though. You nodded, cheeks flushed with embarrassment that he had you this unraveled in front of everyone. Although surprisingly nobody had noticed yet.

He slipped two fingers past your lips. Your tongue swirling around them. His dick throbbed at the sight of your mouth wrapped around him. Sadly wrapped around the wrong body part.

He removed them slowly. Mouth gaping at the saliva that strung off your tongue as he moved them back under your dress, moving your panties to the side and tracing tracing a wide circle around your clit. Just slow enough to hold you on the edge of pleasure.

“I want to hear you say whose pussy this is.” You cried softly. “Tell me baby.” He said watching your face contort at his touch.

You dipped your lips to his ear. Too abashed to look him directly in the eyes right now as he had you helplessly wrapped around his finger.

“It’s yours.” You squeaked out.

“Say my name.”

You were squirming uncontrollably now. But he was careful not to give you what you were dying for until he heard the words spill off your tongue. “It’s yours Shouta...all yours. Please just fuck me already.” You gushed.

“I love how my name sounds in your mouth.” He cooed as he plunged two fingers into you. Feeling the juices swirl around his fingers as he pumped them slowly in and out.

Your hand latched onto his shoulder, digging in at his touch. Your hips couldn’t stop grinding against his hand as you used his thumb as a rubbing board for your clit.

“Look at me.” The sight of your face flushed with pleasure was turning him on even more. Abusing your clit even faster as he felt your walls pulsing around his fingers. The tightness in his pants growing painful at how much it wanted you sat on top of him.

“Kiss me.” You pleaded one last time.

Finally ending his kiss drought, he attached onto that pouty bottom lip of yours. Sucking it hungrily. It had been just as hard for him to keep himself off you. He’d been dying to taste every inch of your body.

You latched onto his lip hoping you’d never have to let go. Biting hard to release all the frustration he’d built up in you. He flinched in pain. Having to slip his hands out of you to pry you off him.

“Fuck.” He said feeling his lip. You’d bit him so hard a little blood had been drawn.

“I’m sorry.” You said biting your nail.

“I suppose that was my own fault wasn’t it.” He smiled before sucking your juices off his fingers.

The sight was enough to send you over the edge. Your pussy was clenching around nothing. Grasping for his dick. You needed him. Right now.

You broke out of his hold and dragged his weight behind you to the ladies restroom. Thanking the heavens there was no line because you would easily have punched your way through it.

Slamming the door shut and locking it he immediately threw your weight against the wall. Picking you up and wrapping your legs around him. You clung to him like he was life itself and started aggressively sucking hickeys onto his neck.

“I missed you so fucking much.” You whined into his ear.

“I missed you too baby. A lot.” He said kissing your neck as he ripped his jeans and briefs down. He couldn’t wait another second to get inside of you.

His dick was rock hard as he swirled the head around your wet opening. Coating it with your warm juices. He groaned loudly in your ear as he sunk into you for the first time.

“Fuck you feel so good.”

Chills went through you as you felt him stretching out your walls. Wanting him to stuff you with every inch he had.

He pumped into you quickly. You relished at the pain and pleasure of his forceful thrusts. He wanted you so desperately he couldn’t control his power even if he wanted to.

He crashed his mouth against yours to muffle the loud moans that they definitely could hear on the other side of the door.

His mouth started sucking on that pink tongue of yours, mixing with the intense pleasure of him rutting into you. Your hold around his shoulders was going limp. He was fucking the strength right out of you.

“Turn around.” He ordered as he placed you back on the ground. Hiking your dress up to completely expose your ass.

He pressed your chest up against the wall. The cold bricks chilling your skin as he pushed your panties to the side again and inserted his entire shaft from behind. Bottoming out with one forceful thrust and holding it there as he hit your g-spot. Pleasure surged through your body, causing you to moan his name.

The sound of his name pouring off your lips was causing rumbling in his head. He felt himself nearing as he rammed into you faster. Dick throbbing at the way your ass jiggled every time he thrust into you.

The knot in your stomach grew tighter as you started rubbing circles around your clit. He was hitting your g-spot with every stroke. You were seconds away from overflowing with euphoria.

“I’m gonna cum Shouta.” You whined as he kept at you relentlessly. Hands clamped on your hips.

“Cum on me baby.” He encouraged as he felt your legs starting to shake.

Just then the knot snapped. And electricity flooded your body. Your hand clamped around his, pulling him against your back in pure gratitude.

Your walls tightening around him sent him over the edge. His rhythm growing sloppy just as he burst, filling you with warm cum. Groaning as he threw his last few weak pumps in pleasure. Coming down from his intense high.

“Shit y/n. Come here.” He said wrapping around your neck and pulling you up to place a sloppy wet kiss on the mouth that had been calling his name.

You both were breathing heavy as he pulled you into his arms. You nuzzled your face into him. Silently worshiping him for the satisfied humming in your body left over from your chilling orgasm.

“I think I missed you more than I realized.” He cooed into your ear. Gently rubbing your pussy from behind. Reminiscing on how amazing the juices felt around him.

You giggled. Yanking him into one last lingering kiss before pulling your dress back down.

He buckled himself up and patted your hair down that he’d disheveled.

When you opened the door, several stunned faces were staring at you.

Giggling nervously, Aizawa pulled you through the crowd to go close his tab out.

He was holding your hand tight as you clung to his arm. Staring at his side profile with hearts in your eyes as he tipped the bartender.

On your way out you bumped into someone’s back. The muscle man turned around in shock.

Not batting an eye you said “excuse me” and kept walking.

You looked up nervously to see Aizawa’s response to the poorly timed interaction but he was just peering at you out of the corner of his eyes with a satisfied little grin.

He grabbed your jaw and pressed a deep kiss on you. Not breaking his stride once as he led you to the door.

“Let’s hurry up and go home. I’m not finished with you yet.”

~~

First smut post so hopefully it didn’t suck 😩

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