#queerer things still*

[alphacygni]

The fact that everyone is losing it over Stede calling Ed his boyfriend in a deleted scene shot on a cell phone just underscores for me how thoroughly S2 was de-queered.

They call each other “friends” in the actual show. The season does not end with them holding hands or kissing or anything even though we’re meant to see it as them starting their life together.

Any vaguely polyamorous situation has been erased entirely.

Our sapphic couple follow up “You’re so fucking hot right now” with…a hug. I mean Anne kisses Stede but not her wife? 😩

Max’s dirty fingerprints are all over so much of this. I know some cuts are to be expected for time and flow and pacing. But so much of this is clearly Max trying to make the show palatable enough to milk for that sweet four quadrant cash…and even that wasn’t enough to save it.

[pia-writes-things]

The fact that the HDM show managed to transform a very staight book into a very queer story means so much to me 🥰🏳️‍🌈

[maddgical-boy]

so ive been planning to make redraws of my dear qts paras as vocaloid songs i daydream about them to and i have finished. one. but i am so proud of it i need to post it somewhere so congrats tumblr you get to see it before the whole batch goes on insta <3

here is mona with hibana by deco*27 💕 i love her sm

[theinfinitedivides]

yeah they're still as gay the second time around folks

[theinquisitxor]

.

[londonspirit]

*

[migdrlegorbio]

the world threw me into my family as a girl with two brothers, and as of right now im the only brother here

[booboothedude]

it’s so fuckin weird spending a lot of time thinking abt media I actually like and that lots of other ppl also like and think about a lot. genuinely overwhelming

[tossawary]

Regarding "The Hobbit" film trilogy, even if I ended up personally disliking and resenting how much time and focus the elf characters (and others) ended up taking away from the dwarves whom I think deserved more focus as rich internal characters (I know that studio pressures are a factor in that terrible love triangle and so on), I still... vaguely appreciate the effort to create and include named female characters like Tauriel, when the book is sadly lacking in them. I think she's fine, actually. Comparatively, there are many other elements in these adaptations that I think are much, MUCH worse.

But still, if you want to add female characters to this story, the obvious answer to me seems to be to just make half the Company into dwarf women? (With similarly fancy beards and other facial hair! Because I think that's fun.) It's just... so much easier?

Do NOT come at me with that "dwarf women are rare" bullshit. Unreliable narration. Logistically unlikely. Also, if you believe that "men are the warriors and craftsmen, the women stay at home" is how dwarf society strictly functions (boring, honestly, on top of being incredibly sexist), I could argue that the Battle of Azanulbizar and other struggles probably left a significant dent in this dwarf group's male population, leaving behind many widows and mothers without children to pick up the work. The battlefields have come to and TAKEN both Erebor and Moria from the dwarves. I see no good reason why dwarf women would not have equal investment in reclaiming their home and the gold. Many of the Company are not presented to be formally trained warriors, anyway.

Now, ideally, we could do way queerer stuff in terms of both romance and gender here, but we know cowards with veto powers would not let this happen. Still, I feel like basic genderbending would have been a very doable move and is, actually, a very reasonable ask of an adaptation that would have added some depth to the story even if you didn't acknowledge the change at all.

Like, preferably, this would be an adaptational change that would be directly addressed. Maybe all of the Company appear male at first due to traveling that way (and assumptions made by humans and hobbits), then Bilbo might learn that some of the Company are dwarf women when he becomes closer to all of them. We could have a brief scene acknowledging that dwarf women are fighting these battles for their pasts and their futures too. It doesn't have to be a big thing! They can just be there. Existing. Participating.

I even think it would be fun if two of the dwarves were actually an older married couple traveling together, instead of brothers or cousins, because loving married bickering and battle couples are fun. You can have running jokes in the background about how Smaug's invasion ruined their wedding day, and going back and forth with "you never take me anywhere nice" @ each other whenever they're stuck in Goblintown or the Mirkwood dungeons. (I like seeing good marriages & partnerships in fiction and established couples going on fantasy quests together. I just think it's neat.)

But another (sillier) direction is that you could just cast some actresses in beards to play some of the dwarves, then leave the fact that some of these characters are probably dwarf women (traveling as men) as a fun detail for the audience. Bilbo is either too oblivious to notice or much too polite to bring it up at all. It's canonically compliant to the text this way!

Now, obviously some few people would have complained that Tolkien's work was being ruined by "political correctness", but they complained anyway about Tauriel (when there are MANY other bad choices in these movies), and what worthwhile arguments could they have possibly made against genderbending some of the THIRTEEN dwarves? Like, most casual fans I know cannot NAME the entire Company, who get so little character development in the book that the films had to come up with unique designs and backgrounds for most of them anyway. Bro (directed towards someone objecting to the idea of including female dwarves), be real, there's no way that you honestly cared this much about "Nori the Dwarf" before right now.

[zephirite]

'Complicated' doesn't equal 'Queer'

The analysis of Mizu's gender and identity are wonderful to read. I am a massive fan of queer readings that complicate and enhance the present narrative, and feel like a natural extension of the character.

However. It is a bit saddening that people see a fraught relationship with gender and immediately label it as fraught because it's queer, instead of allowing their idea of womanhood to expand to include fraught relationships with gender expression. It's as if...the demographics Mizu's confirmed to belong to (being a woman and being bi-racial) aren't 'enough', so people have to put her in another demographic (being trans) in order to care about/understand her. It feels like it erases the specificity of her story as being ABOUT womanhood, because they cannot fathom womanhood being this full with pain and confusion without signifying queerness. For a relationship (between people, or between a person and themself) to be queer, one would say it must fall outside of the norms enforced by society. But in reality, EVERYONE is outside the norm in various ways. There is no person who's a paragon of society, strutting about confidently. It's why the 'all white men have it easy' argument fails; if it's not gender or race complicating your life, it's religion, ability, mental illness, wealth, language, or a million other things. In reality, everyone has a complicated relationship with all facets of their identity. People are forced into roles now as much as during the Edo period, just in different ways. So anyone expressing difficulty within their roles does not immediately equate to them being queer. Is Akimi queer because she wants to control her life? By modern standards, we'd say "No", because modern conceptions of womanhood include independence. But during the Edo period, womanhood equaled ownership. Seki tells this to Amiki, and she flees, determined to prove him wrong. By their standards, her attempting independence is inherently non-womanly. Another cultural/historical difference is the characters in this show don't have the luxury of their presentation being self-expression. To claim that Mizu wears pants, a hat, and cloak because she IS a man ignores that being revealed as a woman will get her kicked out of cities, killed, assaulted, or ignored. She is not living in a neutral environment and choosing to dress 'masc'; she's trying to survive. She wants to be seen as a man so she can be let into the city, and not freeze--which we see happen to a woman and her child, whom the guard refused to let in without her dead husband. If Mizu didn't have to fight and lived with people who all knew she was female--and she still dressed in men's apparel--that would signify her comfort in far queerer ways than pure survival. (Notice she wore a kimono around Mikio for years without seeming any less comfortable in it than her 'male' clothing. She dresses for her role, not personal expression.) Other characters allowed to fret over their appearance without the fans questioning their gender.

Akimi is haunted by having to blacken her teeth, since it signifies how she'll have to modify her body to appeal to the husband she doesn't want. And Taigen is distraught over Mizu slicing his topknot--not for the bald spot, as Akimi teases--but because even cutting hair was seen as defiling the body your family gave you. Additionally, it was done without his consent--therefore ruining his honor as a warrior, which was how Akimi's father justified ending their engagement. Both these reasons could lend themselves to queer narratives, but because Aikmi and Taigen dress consistently in their gendered clothing, the fans let them maintain their cultural significance and don't question their genders. Whereas Mizu looking at her boobs supposedly signifies dysphoria--and therefore being trans--as opposed to the growth of something that could get her discovered, and ruin her life. Bit inconsistent, no? I can see where people relate to the androgyny/trans/nonbinary reading of Mizu--but that should be an expansion of themes, not an exclusion. Let womanhood stay part of that analysis. Please.

I've been longing for a show to critically dissect womanhood in a historical and cultural context, and was so excited to see if other people felt as seen as I did. So watching some Queer headcanons ignore the established cultural, character-specific, and plot of the story...kinda stings. It's similar to the Encanto fiasco, where fans were quick to prioritize their assumption of a character's gender/sexuality/neurodivergence over their established motives. Like Isabella not wanting to marry a man because she was a lesbian, instead of her feeling pressured to do it because it was what her family expected of someone as 'perfect' and 'pretty' as her. Being a lesbian could've enhanced that, but claiming that was the ONLY reason rubbed people the wrong way. Particularly, people who were excited to see cultural norms and familial expectations mold the characters. Now, headcanons harm no one. Characters are not fragile; they can be stretched to fit many interpretations. But when entering a fandom, we do not leave our biased baggage at the door. And it might be nice to question why we feel the need to take a situation we may not understand and reshape it to fit our modern lens, instead of growing our understanding. It's cute to imagine the characters in a less-fraught world, but...are we losing the very essence of the characters when we do?

[iviarelleblr]

Genuinely fascinated at the showrunners of live-action ATLA misunderstanding the purpose of a character arc so badly. Like, I don't live in that fandom, I'm not super emotionally invested, but it feels rather on the same level as the guys who made Game of Thrones saying "themes are for 8th grade book reports" and Disney trying to shoehorn extra modern feminism into the Beauty and the Beast live action adaptation. In this case, characters need arcs, and sometimes that means a good character does bad things at first so they can learn to do better, because it's REALLY IMPORTANT ACTUALLY that kids get to internalize that doing bad things now doesn't mean you're bad forever.

Meanwhile we've got the Wheel of Time adaptation over here saying "The first books were written with only a loose outline of the series arc and for an audience more than a generation removed from today's sensibilities. We're going to tighten up the story structure, avoid repeating some character beats to death the way the books did, and generally make this a smoother journey than the books are, as well as shorter, but still with all the satisfaction of an arc trajectory well executed. Also make it queerer." Like, legitimately, I'm in Discords with people who Know Their Shit, and even the costume department read the brief and had a professional costumer predicting book 14 plot points just from embroidery on an outfit and a certain camera-cut in episode 1x02. In season 2, some other authors were analyzing the story beats and showing us in full-spoiler channels exactly how the changes being made are setting up the endgame in some ways better than the original author was equipped to when he thought the story was going slightly different places.

Good adaptations are possible, but you need someone at the helm who understands why a story is doing what it's doing. Rafe Judkins's team is doing incredible work on WOT but he also hired a book consultant, who read the series dozens of times, and can help balance the needs of the original story against the needs of the television medium. You can't adapt a story unless you understand the story, and it seems like the ATLA people are doing a lot of the same things that Disney's live action adaptations of their former animated hits have been doing: adapting the superficial layer of the story without understanding its underpinnings and why those resonated so much with audiences.

[dwobbitfromtheshire]

We need more bisexual rep, which is why I headcanon Steve, Eddie, Lucas, Max, and El as bisexual. I'm still unsure about Mike. I think he wouldn't label himself, but I'm not sure. I sometimes lean toward him being gay. Sometimes, I lean towards him being bisexual, and sometimes, I lean towards him being pansexual. I can't get a read on him. He's definitely queer. I also could kind of headcanon him as aromantic like Nancy. I headcanon Dustin as asexual along with El, and I could also see Dustin being pansexual. For me, Argyle is a trans man and pansexual. Hop and Joyce are bi4bi like Steddie. Jonathan is definitely pansexual to me. Scott Clarke is gay to me. Wayne is another question mark to me. He might be one who doesn't like labels like my dad. There's something about Wayne who reminds me of my dad a little bit. Well, a mixture of Wayne and Hopper. Tommy H is gay and Carol is a lesbian. They're beards, okay? Karen Wheeler is a frustrated closeted bisexual (I refuse to believe she lusted after Bully. It didn't happen for me because it didn't add anything to the story.) Jason Carver is a deeply closeted gay man (I still hate him). Yeah, I definitely headcanon Chrissy as bisexual but I can see her being a lesbian or pansexual too. Hell, I could see her being someone who doesn't label herself either. The conservatives hiding behind their religious guilt hate Eddie because he's not afraid of hiding who he is. Anyway, no one in Hawkins is straight. Stranger Things? More like Queerer Things.

Canon: Robin Buckley is a lesbian, Will Byers is gay, and Vickie is bisexual.

I was only going to mention a few people. Whoops, I got carried away.

EDIT: I ALMOST FORGOT ABOUT GARETH. Gareth is definitely gay!

I can also see Eddie and Steve being trans as well as Max.

[maddgical-boy]

more lazily made para content yowza

[justonemorechapternicercy]

Being a bisexual was hard as fuck on a normal day, but it was especially hard to be when you had to face with two incredibly attractive people.

Who were partners. Queerplatonic life partners, but committed partners nonetheless.

Fuck his life.

“Percy! You made it!” Rachel grinned, waving from her seat in her usual exuberance. She looked so radiant, so full of life, especially next to her partner, the literal stormcloud. They were like the Sun and the Moon next to each other, and they were beautiful. One colorful and full of life, the other, full in black and looking like a vampire prince straight out of a dark romance story.

What's more, even though he looked like the devil, according to Rachel, he was actually a complete softie.

So, Percy Jackson was fucked. He couldn't even run away because how would that look now that they noticed him?

“Uh, yeah… Hi, Rachel! Hi, Nico!” He smiled a bit awkwardly, shaking hands with Nico, and being smothered by Rachel's warm hug. “Do you need anything?” He asked, nodding towards the counter.

“No, we are good, and I also got that blue hot chocolate you adore so much!”

Percy stopped. And stared.

There, next to Nico's dark coffee, and Rachel’s tea, was his blue hot chocolate. With marshmallows. And coconut flakes.

So fucking unfair that Rachel already knew the way straight into his heart. And was anybody wondering why he would fall for somebody he knew was in a committed relationship?! He couldn’t even say he didn’t know that! Rachel was very straightforward from the first time, mentioning her soulmate in basically every sentence.

“Oh… thank you,” he mumbled, sitting down in front of them. Rachel's answering smile was so radiant, that Percy had to wonder where his sunglasses were.

“Now, I know you heard a lot about each other, but this is Percy, the teacher I was talking about. I helped him with his car, and now he is helping me with the art project in the lodge. He is so creative and fun! And this is Nico, my soulmate in the whole world. We've known each other for basically forever, our parents are in the same circles, and we bonded through mischiefs and shared trauma.”

“That sounds… fun,” he deadpanned. He was quite happy that he didn’t stay with his father if this was what rich kids had to bond about.

“Right?” Nico snorted. “It is nice to meet you. Rach’s told me so much about you, it feels like I already know you.”

Percy blushed. The words seemed innocent enough, but the way Nico said them, and that look in his eyes…

Percy was a disaster of a bisexual.

“Hi, me too. I mean, you too. I mean, it is nice to meet you, and I know so much about you too!” Percy rambled. Taking a sip of his hot chocolate, he let out a satisfied sigh. Coconut and white chocolate was the best combination!

He opened his eyes he didn’t even realize he closed, and blushed again, being at the crossfire of two pairs of blazing eyes.

He must have been imagining things, mustn’t he? There was no way-

No. There was no way. Rachel and Nico were way too close to each other; it was obvious to see the easy connection between the two of them. They shared inside jokes and complained about people Percy didn’t know anything about and they made each other laugh. Rachel with her sunny disposition and Nico with his sarcastic remarks was a surprisingly perfect combination. They tried to involve Percy, but… he still felt like an outsider. 

“Oooh, Percy! Nico and I were talking about what we are doing on Christmas. We have this silly tradition of watching cheesy holiday movies together, while we complain about how much better it could be if we were the ones writing them. They would be a lot queerer, that’s for sure,” Rachel giggled. “Anyway, you’ll join us, right?”

“Uh… I’m not sure if I can do it,” he said. Rachel and even Nico looked disappointed, but they nodded.

Throughout the morning, Percy watched Nico and Rachel share mischievous smiles, finish each other’s sentences as if they were one mind in two bodies, and being completely in sync. It left Percy feeling a pang of jealousy. Trying to hide it, he forced a smile, but it was hard to see the girl he’d been crushing on, and the guy who left him breathless, be the perfect partners.

As they drank the last drops of their beverages, he just wanted to leave. They were nice, they were cute, and they were leaving him so overwhelmed.

“So, I will show Nico around before we go back to the lodge. Will you join us?”

The words tumble out of Percy’s mouth before he could stop himself. “Thanks, but I’ve got some stuff to do. I’ll meet you at the lodge later, okay?” He hesitated for a moment, then said, “It was nice to meet you! I’ll… uh… I’ll go now. To do… things. Important things.”

Rachel and Nico shared an unreadable look, but they nodded. He couldn’t stop the feeling that he must have missed something significant, something that he couldn’t understand because he wasn’t part of them. He was an outsider.

That hurt more than he had any right to feel.

As he stepped out of the coffee shop, he felt like he left something important behind. But he had to leave; he didn't want to see how the girl who he'd been crushing on since the moment she helped him with his car, be so lovey-dovey with her cute boyfriend.

He always had a tiny thing for curly hair. And they had curly hair squared.

–

“Wait! There’s an ice rink?” Nico exclaimed.

“Of course, we have,” Percy grinned. It was always the best time of the year when they opened the rink in the middle of the town square. He loved every type of water sport - and he considered most winter sports as water sports. Ice and snow were, after all, just cold water.

“Let’s go then! What are we waiting for?!”

Nico was so excited, Percy didn’t realize he could be so enthusiastic about something like ice skating. He looked like the devil himself in his black dresses and dark looks; it was absolutely adorable when he looked like a little kid in a candy store.

“You will come with us, right? Please, come with us!”

One touch of Nico, and Percy was too weak to say no. He sighed, but said, “Okay.”

The answering grin was more than enough to balance the heartache.

He led them to the town square, which was transformed into a winter wonderland, decorated with twinkling lights and festive ornaments. The sweet smell of mulled wine felt intoxicating, but not as intoxicating as the closeness of Rachel and Nico was.

Bundled up in scarves, hats, and mittens, they looked like two fallen angels.

The two men dragged Rachel behind them, gliding onto the ice, hand in hand. They laughed at Rachel’s fumblings, and the girl cheered for the two competing men who did more and more elaborate moves on the ice. 

It was a great time. 

As they skated, the initial awkwardness faded completely, and the joy of having two people he liked took over. Rachel and Nico included Percy effortlessly, sharing stories about each other - like the fact that Nico used to be a professional ice skater before he had to take over his father’s law firm -, and getting to know each other better.

Rachel was already fun to spend time with, but with Nico, they were an unstoppable force. Their banters were hilarious and sometimes Percy was afraid they would melt the ice with the way they roasted each other.

“Watch this,” Nico grinned, and spun and twirled on the ice, like the Ice Prince he was.

“He really is something, isn’t he?” Rachel smiled softly. Percy mirrored her.

“He really is.”

As Nico skated back to them, he winked at Percy, a mischievous twinkle in his eyes. “Come, let’s leave the loser behind, and show me your moves.” He grabbed Percy’s hand, who joined the other man. They moved as if their movements were choreographed, their ice dance was a surprise show for the other skaters.

As they glided gracefully, Nico pulled Percy into a spin, their laughter echoing in the rink. Percy felt like he could fly; he was so gone on them. Their eyes met, and for a moment, time seemed to stand still. The playful atmosphere shifted, and the connection Percy felt the moment their eyes met on that fateful day in the coffee shop, deepened. He was tempted, but…

He leaned away, breaking the moment.

It wasn’t fair to Rachel.

–

“Tonight has been amazing, hasn’t it?” Percy wondered. The first time he met with Nico, he’d been afraid, rejected, and feeling like an outsider. But after some days, getting to know Nico, and Rachel-and-Nico, spending time with them was as easy as breathing. Their time together was magical and fun, and everything he’d ever wished for. He wasn’t sure if it was only him who felt the connection, but even if the romantic tone was just in his head, their friendship meant so much to him.

Rachel, curled in his lap, nodded. “Yes.”

Nico, leaning against him on the other side, hummed affirmatively. Percy felt like he belonged between them, squished from both sides. The initial pain about Rachel’s and Nico’s relationship faded, replaced by the realization that they really wanted to spend time with them. They included him, they sought out him individually and together as well, and they constantly touched him.

Their bond was genuine.

“Thanks for convincing me to join you. The whole week was so much fun, I don’t remember the last time I enjoyed myself so much.” He took a sip of his eggnog and sighed contently.

“Thank you for indulging us. You made this Christmas into the best Christmas ever. Spending time here… I thought it was going to be a nightmare. I never wanted to be in a small town, especially not during the holiday, without Nico, trying to promote the lodge, but you made everything so much better. Thank you.” Rachel’s words made his insides melt. He was glad he wasn’t the only one who thought this holiday was magical.

Nico moved, and he partly laid on Percy. “Coming here was the best decision I’ve ever made. Thank you for being you.”

They chatted for a while, watching those cheesy Christmas movies they mentioned before. The movies were like copies of each other, even the actors were mostly the same - but commenting on them, wondering how they would change things, made the whole experience amazing.

As they watched one movie that was particularly similar to their own experiences, except for the partner who came wasn’t keen on getting to know the small-town guy, Nico grinned mischievously, making Percy’s inside quiver.

“Uh-huh. I don’t like that look,” he joked.

“What? I’m completely innocent,” Nico batted his eyelashes. “I was just thinking about how much better our story is.”

Rachel nudged Nico with a teasing smile. “I agree, it is so much better!”

Nico sat up, facing Percy with a more serious expression. “I wanted to tell you something.”

“Uh… What is it?” Percy asked uncertainly, unsure if it was going to go as he wished, or if he read the room wrong.

“I think you are the most captivating person I’ve ever met.” Percy blushed but didn’t break their eye contact.

“And I think you are the most confusing one,” he mumbled.

“In a good way, I hope,” Nico grinned.

“The best way,” Percy nodded.

Not letting to derail the conversation, Nico took a deep breath. His expression turned more sincere, eyes conveying nothing but the truth. “There’s something else I wanted to say. I’ve been trying to find the right moment, and… well. We work well together, aren’t we? We are having fun and it feels like we’ve known each other for years. I know we just met three weeks ago… But spending time with you, made me realize how much I like you. I like you, Percy. More than just a friend, differently than I like Rachel, my literal platonic life partner. I’ve been crushing on you, and I hope that it is not one-sided.”

The room fell silent for a moment as Percy processed what the hell had happened. He pinched himself, afraid that he was dreaming, but…

It was real.

“I… I hope I didn’t make things awkward,” Nico mumbled nervously. “I just wanted to be honest with you.”

“No, I… I feel the same. I like you too, Nico.” Percy hesitated, but in for a penny, in for a pound, he turned towards Rachel. “And I like you, too. You two are the best thing that ever happened to me. I had a crush on you ever since we met, and after meeting with Nico, I couldn’t help but fall for him too.”

Rachel beamed. “I like you too!”

They giggled, the relief in the room was almost palpable.

Percy turned to Nico, whose eyes were full of promises. Leaning in, with a gentle touch, Nico captured Percy’s lips in a tender kiss. The world faded around them, his whole universe was concentrated in the two people he was intertwined with. Breaking their kiss, they breathed in each other.

Before he could react, Rachel was already there, leaning in, kissing him sweetly, feather-softly. He never expected this to happen with him in real life, but… It was better than anything he’d ever imagined. The two of them… They were everything to him.

As they pulled away, Rachel looked into Percy’s eyes, her gaze filled with affection.

“Merry Christmas, guys,” Percy said.

“Merry Christmas, Percy,” they replied, smiling more brightly than any of the Christmas lights could ever measure up to.

“Well,” Rachel laughed, breaking the tension with her lighthearted tone. “This is quite the plot twist!”

“I told you our story was way better!” Nico huffed jokingly.

“That you did,” Percy grinned, pressing a quick kiss on Nico’s lips. Now that he could do it, he had the suspicion that he’d never wanted to stop kissing him, kissing them.

And, if they played their cards right, he’d never have to.

[huntingthelioness]

Before Our Flag Means Death I only saw queer media in two genres: the fantasy of happy children and the reality of sad adults.

But then OFMD. A fantasy-reality of queer people of all ages (and races and body types) just being queer and people. Not a coming of age story but a coming of self story. A story that asked, “what if there wasn’t a place for you, and you tried to make a place for yourself, but then you weren’t sure if THAT was for you either, but then someone saw the place you made and thought it was rad as hell and so were you for making it.” A story that said, “If you’re still haunted by your childhood trauma, that’s totally understandable. Who wouldn’t be?” A show that said, “You can make mistakes, but you can come back from them, and YOU are not a mistake.” That said, “No matter what you’ve done, you can be loved.”

When I watched season 1 I was a they/she. They by choice, she by ‘people won’t care enough to get it right and if I pretend to be okay with it then I can make it not hurt.’ And then I heard three pirates call their friend “they” with no preamble, no discussion, no stumbling, no handwringing, no fanfare, no cookies for getting it right. Simply “Seeing as though they’re from here,” “They JUST started talking,” “If they stabbed me I’d be like eh, probably deserved it.” And if fictional 1700s PIRATES can get their friend’s pronouns right, then real modern people can too. I don’t think it was even a month later that I was a they/them.

Our Flag Means Death changed me utterly. It brought the core of me to life again in ways I didn’t know it had died. After s1 I started engaging with fan works again for the first time in over a decade. I made new friends. I got a tattoo. After s2 I started *writing* fan works again after almost *two* decades. (Yes they’re in a Google doc and may never see the light of day but there are currently 13 whole finished stories sitting there like who even am I???) And a hundred other things from tiny thought pattern changes to huge identity shifts. I am not the same person I was two years ago and it’s because of OFMD.

As I grieve the loss of this beautiful show, I think about a phrase I’ve been half jokingly/half bitterly saying to my husband every time I talk about my decision to pursue top surgery—“Whatever else happens [with the abysmal state of USA politics], at least they won’t be able put my boobs back on.” Whatever else happens with OFMD, my life can’t be UNchanged. It happened. Nine hours of television exist that made me queerer, bolder, happier, freer. So too exist the 18+ months of community and love and art and excitement. Studio execs can’t take even a second of that away.

[wen-kexing-apologist]

Only Friends Reflection

Okay, I have been thinking about what I want to write for the finale, and I have too many small threads of a couple different essays, so instead I will just write my own reflection. 

I did not want Top and Mew or Sand and Ray to end up together, but am not mad at Only Friends for ending with those couples in happy relationships specifically, and literally only because I was like 99% certain GMMTV would not allow ForceBook and FirstKhao to be separated. Those are couples that should not be together, but something has to get pulled out of someone’s ass because Jojo and co set out to write one show with non-branded actors, and while they absolutely are not blameless for the fumbles in the finale that undermined the rest of the show, I do think they probably got corralled in to certain themes and endings by the studio. I do not think they navigated the transition between the themes and endings super well. 

I thought about writing an essay on the trend I noticed around kissing. Namely that Nick and Boston have a conversation where we learn that Boston views sex and love as distinct, and that the emotional aspect of relationships is what should separate boyfriends from one sex partners. But that is not the case for Nick, and he has a difficult time conceptualizing this view of physical intimacy while in a relationship with someone. And how that conversation around kissing people who aren’t your boyfriend was sandwiched between a threeway kiss between boyfriends Sand and Ray with Boeing, and Mew daring Sand to kiss his boyfriend, Top. 

I thought about writing an essay about how NO ONE HAS EVER BEEN MORE RIGHT THAN ME, RE: COMMODIFICATION OF SAND. Ray and Boeing both referred to Sand as a dog, Sand literally referred to himself as being owned. Ray wants to go in to business with Sand. From beginning to end Ray has regarded Sand as an object that he owns, and this has been one of the more consistent threads throughout the show. At least Sand is aware of this. I will say one of the most egregious things for me in this entire episode was the literal “SandRay” conversation. Like???

And finally, I will not begrudge anyone, nor will I try to convince anyone to read the finale the way I am here, because every single take about the narrative punishing Boston is completely valid. I see it, I understand it, a lot of me feels it. And also, I think that what happened to Boston is unfair, and that if we are feeling like it is unfair that does a job of demonstrating that Boston’s friends are shitty and judgemental about his sex life and that we don’t treat sluts fairly. I also just like…have not at any point liked Mew, Top, or Cheum as people and as mad as I am that no one apologized to Boston for the sex tape bullshit they put him through? Am I surprised? No. I did not expect them to ever admit to being wrong, because I have seen how they have handled every other mess they have gotten themselves in to. The narrative is absolutely punishing Boston, and while I still have a hard time looking at the extensive history of Jojo and Ninew’s previous works, that they themselves would believe that sluts should be punished. But I understand how it reads, and will allow for both a criticism of their writing that if they didn’t want that to be a take away, they needed to be clearer, and also am not going to fight people saying that Jojo, Ninew, or Den think that way. I mostly just worry that if Jojo and co are seen as being anti-slut/sex-negative that people whose first exposure to their work is Only Friends will not watch their other work. 

Which is a damn shame, because The Warp Effect and 3 Will Be Free are very good pieces, and very important in terms of pushing GMMTV’s boundaries on including sex, having a polyamorous and open relationship, and including trans women who are allowed to be complex, and not just act as a minor character. It was also pointed out to me that TWE and 3WBF, which I hold are some of the queerer stories from GMMTV I’ve seen, are not listed as BLs and therefore may not be subject to some of the same expectations. Those also didn’t use branded pairs. 

Ultimately, to come at this from an assets based approach, regardless of the feelings around the end of the show, I do think that Only Friends served to push some of GMMTV’s boundaries, I want the branded pairs done away with, and I low key hope some of the negative reactions to the ending of this show where the branded pairs get their happy endings will serve to demonstrate to GMMTV that sometimes, maintaining their brands…is worse. 

But the pairs probably bring in too much money for them to care.