#schlinx

[principal-of-business]

A package appears for Schlatt, it is waiting for him (at the house or at a mail building.) The return sender is anonymous.

Inside of the box, upon first opening, it launches confetti. A prank cannon. The confettis that come out are penis shaped, and rainbow colored.

Beneath that and some packing peanuts, is a letter on top of various cat treats and toys.

"Schlatt,

The only reason your birthday was beneficial is because now your cats have a dad.

Fuck you,

M"

Deeper in the box, at the very bottom, wrapped carefully in bubble wrap, is a bottle of Redbreast year 27 Irish whiskey.

Schlatt had honestly forgotten about the day, he had been honestly promptly ignoring it for the most part. It wasn't something he necessarily felt was worth celebrating, despite what others might think.

So when he got a notification that he had a package delivered to him, he assumed it was more products for him to review as merch, taking it back to his room without another thought. Of course, when he finally opened it on his desk, he nearly fell backwards out of his chair from the sudden confetti explosion and screamed. Huffing under leftover penises floating over his head and around his room, he looked further into the box for an explanation, rummaging through until he found the note.

Carefully he read through it, his face slowly curling up into a disgusted snarl and crumpling up the papers in his hands, throwing it back behind him and landing on his bed. If he didn't catch the toys and food for his cats, he would've thrown out the box right there, no longer wanting to indulge with this package anymore knowing exactly where it came from. But it seemed to rattle when with something else in it as he moved, taking out everything inside with the thought of their being a tracker on their somehow, but instead....

Whiskey?

His narrowed eyes almost softened for a second, just staring at it for awhile as he thought about the night of the party over again.

The drinks being poured on each other.

Her breaking a fucking glass.

Him biting her fucking chest!

He almost wanted to break the bottle in his hands right now from it all....

...Yet.

He groaned, just getting up and kicking away whatever penis confetti was in his way as he laid out on his bed. While he popped the whiskey bottle open, he felt the crumbled note on his back behind him, adjusting and grabbing it. He uncrumpled it, reading it over one more time and feeling his face to scrunch up the more he read.

"....Fucking bitch." he shook his head before downing the alcohol.

[aztrosist666]

(schlatt voice compressed through iphone facetime mic) huge tits . and rack

[lifeintheworldtocome]

[insert that one img thats like "oh nice i get to explain this to you. youre going to regret this"]

SO ok well we r blurry rn but one of our headmates is ctechnoblade (av is unable to specify if its kin or fictive and says its neither) and theres this one timeline thats basically a modern/urban fantasy au. theres a lot going on in this timeline so i will try to be brief (1/187)

so basically schlatt is the single father of the manberg cabinet so tubbo, quackity, and fundy, q and fund are adopted but tubbo is biological, also schlatt was transmasc. oh and minx was transfem. so yknow, tubbo was the schlinx mpreg baby (none of these words are in the bible)

anyway theres a couple other prominent families, theres the minecrafts where philza minecraft is the divorced father of techno wilbur and tommy (techno and wilbur are twins and bio, tommy is technically the nephew/cousin whose bio dad is jordan captainsparklez but anyway)

and there was also the wastakens! which had badboyhalo and skeppy (last names unknown????) with their also mpreg baby sapnap (skeppy was transmasc) and they were all demons. HOWEVER the wastakens (drista, dream, and XD) also lived with them because their parents (mamacita and mexican dream) were dead or something

regardless thats not important, anyway the kids are all older around young adult and stuff mostly except for crumb (also child of jordan captainsparklez) who was a couple years younger than tommy (i could be wrong about the timing it mightve been after she got kicked out when she turned 18)

anyway turns out someone from schlatt's highschool/college days is in town again (aka callmecarson) and hes pissed about it because carson was still a creep

however it turns out he and bbh went out for brunch sometimes when schedules allowed, anyway schlatt was venting to bbh about the carson situation and bbh was like "huh! thats interesting. say, youre well off, right? well, yknow how money makes the world go 'round? i bet like 10-20 grand could makw that problem disappear real quick" so schlatt gives him the money and then carson turns up dead in a river a couple days later! for context bbh was a hitman

anyway following bbh telling the canonmate gc about this memory he realized he and schlatt had gay sex on the regular and schlatt bottomed.

[brett-is-afraid]

Okay but Schlatt x Tubbo x Minx polycule where Tubbo has a huge mommy AND daddy kink and just,, he just wants all their attention and affection and just gets fucked dumb?? And they call him cute little pet names 🥺

.

[sunflowerhae]

I just want what schlatt and minx have ….

[l0caliser]

this is a пsfw blog, 18+

ask status: open!

feel free to send requests, asks about headcanons or prompts etc, anything of the like. i'm friendly!

hey there! i'm local, on here i'll be writing and maybe posting art!

i use twitter too, so if you're on there you may recognise me or my stuff. not a thief just joining some pals on tumblr!

rules

1. i am fine with writing about all adult creators! forgive me that i may not watch a lot of them. i will NOT post content about any minors. no exceptions.

2. i will tag all the content of who i write about! example 'c: dream'!

3. i've never written xreader content, though i'm happy to try if people want! request any ships/pairings your heart desires, though!

4. although i will write about non-con, i won't write about vore or heavy gore (blood, violence, etc, is fine)

5. i'll also write sfw content! if you want something fluffy or angsty let me know and i'll be sure to do something!

but importantly thanks for stopping by!

[ezra-oi]

Ok so does anyone else remember about two years ago, when the Jschlatt and Minx rajjchelors happened, and we all just made fun of Minx for simping for him but still starved for Schlinx content because it was still fun and really entertaining actually?

So I just listened to Kesha's High road album and it brought back all of my memories from that time, especially Resentment. It's always remainded me to them and now that I checked the lyrics it's just so them I can't. The bridge and last course together, come on....

If I could animate or at least had some experience in video editing I would make such a fan edit of them to Resentment and wouldn't even regret spending hours with it.

[faebriel]

i do think it’s extremely sad that the last 10-15 years of internet fandom, specifically of internet personalities, has cultivated this kind of culture where truthing and shipping ccs is okay or even encouraged. and i really do think it’s influenced how current figures conduct themselves to maintain some kind of control over their followings - like if people are going to uncomfortably ship you with your best mate its almost in your best interest (/neg) to roll with the punches and make/attract that content yourself, because at least then you profit

[principal-of-business]

Everybody Wants To Know If We Fucked On The Bathroom Sink || Schlinx

Schlatt had no regard for anything. Nothing. Not the party that was happening around him. Not the winners that every else around him was celebrating for. Not even the party goers, as he carried off an old scorching fling out into the closest bathroom he could find. They had been at it all night, even going as far as making a mess and lashing out in front of everyone in the most disgusting of ways. Yet somehow, it led to this. It always led to this. He couldn’t escape it.

Without bothering to check where he was going, he walked into the first restroom he could find, shoving the door open with his foot and doing the same for the stall’s. He didn’t dare let go of her, grasping her close to him until he was pressing her into the stall’s wall with a groan, only pulling back to catch his breath and taking the moment to stare over her in this state. “Fuck, you’ve been a huge fuckin’ bitch all night, you know that?!” He gripped her hair a little harder behind her head, just to grab her attention.

@minxjust

[trashland-llamas]

So I made this video into a fic. Up until the 0:27 mark.

Gn reader

The New Yorker had walked up behind y/n propping a gun to the base of their head. Y/n semi-aware, was scrolling through fan art of the man in question, Jschlatt & Minx’s ship Schlinx. Cocking the prop gun, in a low tone, ‘do you know Schlinx is fucking dead?’

Pulling out a fake gun of their own, y/n slowly turned around to face him. With the gun pointed at him, y/n exclaimed, ‘Maybe I don’t want it to be dead!’ Slowly standing up with the gun still steadily pointed at Jschlatt. ‘Don’t you realize it’s dead?’ Jschlatt continuing with the script, emphasizing the word ‘dead’.

‘ALWAYS-‘ the man in question being interrupted with the bathroom door opening, y/n’s head quickly turning to face the newly introduced person. Charlie, with his pants still down, also having a gun in hand pointing it at y/n. The trio forming a straight line at the moment. Adding an odd accent to his voice, ’WhAt’S gOiNg On HeRe?’ Jschlatt, redirecting his gun to point at Charlie, ‘HEY, YOU’RE NoT A PaRt Of ThIs’ also adopting the odd accent.

The trio now moving to the standard Mexican standoff position. Y/n moving their gun to point at Jschlatt. The trio slowly moving to deepthroat each other’s guns.

Camera fades to black.

[unfoundhoney]

gen z dickwad ↠

↠ jschlatt x male!reader , ted nivison x younger brother!reader ; fluff ; requested one two

↠ masterlist

You’ve been up for maybe twenty minutes when Schlatt finally wakes up beside you. You can tell he’s awake by the way he rolls clumsily towards you and shoves his face into your stomach.

“Morning, sunshine,” you greet him.

You get a groan muffled in your stomach in response.

“Big mood.”

Schlatt lifts his head up, “You talk like someone in gen z.”

“I am gen z.”

“Disgusting.”

You laugh and push Schlatt’s hair out of his face for him, “You know you’re also gen z.”

“I don’t claim them.”

“So, everyone in the world from age twenty four to six you don’t claim to be a part of?”

“I’m a forty-year-old from Kansas.”

“Oh.”

“You’re okay with that, right?”

“Let me think.”

You tilt your head to the side, pretending to consider the reality in which you’re dating a Kansan twice your age.

“Nope, too weird,” you decide, “I’m breaking up with you.”

You try to climb out of bed but Schlatt holds you back. Using his remaining grogginess against him, you’re able to pull yourself from his grip and evade his attempt to grab you again. You start to leave the bedroom.

“You’re telling me you wouldn’t still love me if I was a middle-aged man from Kansas?”

“Yes,” you call over your shoulder.

You continue out of the room and into the kitchen where you start the coffee pot. When you return to your bedroom, Schlatt is sat up and checking his phone. After you get ready, he’s gone from the room. You find him on the couch in the living room with a cup of coffee; you make your own and join him.

“Um, excuse me,” Schlatt protests, “This couch is for loyal boyfriends only.”

“Do you want me to pull up the Schlinx videos? Because I will.”

“...touché.”

“Mhm.”

You check your phone for anything important as the news plays on the TV; the current story is something about a soup kitchen that’s got an influx of volunteers recently.

“When’s big brother picking you up?” Schlatt asks during the commercial break.

“Eleven.”

“I’m depending on you to not let Ted sully my good name to your mother before dinner later.”

“Maybe if you didn’t do anything that would ‘sully your good name’ we wouldn’t have that problem.”

“If that’s who I was, I’d be a completely different person.”

You hum in agreement.

“And we wouldn’t want that.”

You don’t respond this time, anxieties about your dinner later tonight numbing your mind to anything else. Your mother is in town for the first time since you and Schlatt got together. You had been “talking” when she visited last, but that’s hardly meet-the-parents worthy.

Now, however, you’ve been dating Schlatt for about six months and have been living together for a few weeks. You two are in this for the long run and your mother’s approval is very important to you.

“Babe, you good?”

Schlatt’s voice is softer than normal in his “I’m being genuine” way, a tone of voice saved almost exclusively for you. He’s looking at you with mild concern which is likely a result of your silence and possible ignoring of something he said previous.

“Yeah,” you lie too quickly.

He gives you a look.

“I am very very nervous about you meeting my mom,” you immediately concede.

“Y/N-“

“And I know- I know her approval or blessing or whatever isn’t going to be a deal breaker but I just really care about what she thinks. She’s always supported me. Like, as a son and a person. When dad wanted space from me when I came out, she convinced him to let me stay. She is so so important to me. What she thinks is important to me.”

Schlatt is quiet as you talk, listening intently and waiting for you to finish.

“And I love you. I really really do. I don’t want you to change; I love who you are. It’s just that my family’s really protective of me and you’re kind of... you. ...y’know?”

“I know.”

“Especially when it comes to first impressions. I just-... I want her to give you a chance.”

Schlatt remains quiet after you’ve said your piece for several moments, thinking of how best to respond.

“Don’t you think, for you, she would? Give me a chance?”

You look over at him, having looked away during your anxious monologue.

“I haven’t met much of your family yet,” Schlatt says. “But I do know Ted. And I know he adores you, as much as he bullies you. And even though you’re a child of satan over half the time, the entirety of the internet adores you just as much. If that’s any indication, I think that no matter how much of a dickwad I come off as at first, your mom will wait to actually get to know me before passing verdict. Because you’re her darling baby boy.”

“May I request you try to come off as little of a dickwad as possible?”

“I don’t know if that’s in my vocabulary.”

“That’s doesn’t make sense.”

“Doesn’t it?”

You blink at him confusedly, “...n-no?”

Schlatt laughs and you chuckle, knowing he only meant to confuse you.

There’s a knock at the door. A glance at your phone tells you you missed Ted’s “I’m headed up, please don’t be naked” text. You stand to get the door, but Schlatt calls you back. He stands and looks at you.

“Even if your mom doesn’t love me immediately, which is highly unlikely-“

“Eh...”

“It’s highly unlikely but in that case, she loves you. Your word- and hopefully Ted’s, too, unless he’s being a bitch- should mean more than my... ahem, brutish personality.”

“I like to think of it as a persona.”

“Nah, I’m just built different.”

“Sorry, what was that about not being gen z?”

Schlatt moves to make a run for it, “Boys, we’ve been made.”

You laugh and grab his hand to keep him from running. He comes back to stand in front of you. He cups your face.

“If it makes you feel better, I will try to be on my best behavior tonight.”

“Thank you.”

“I don’t know how little of a dickwad that will make me, but...”

“Hopefully, one day, she will eventually come to love you, dickwad-ness and all.”

Schlatt laughs, “One day.”

He kisses you.

There’s another knock at the door, louder this time.

Schlatt nudges you towards the door, “Alright, go have brunch before your brother breaks in and accuses me of murdering you again.”

You hesitate, “What do you mean again?”

“...Have a good brunch!”

Schlatt quickly retreats into your bedroom and you roll your eyes, continuing toward the door.

“I’ll see you later. Love you!”

“Love you, too!” Schlatt yells back from the bedroom.

You open the door and there stands your brother, Ted.

“What took so long?” he asks, stepping inside so you can put your shoes on.

“What happened to greeting your brother?” you counter.

“Is that you avoiding telling me you were sucking Schlatt’s dick?”

“If you must know, we were having a very deep and meaningful conversation,” you say, standing from tying your shoes.

As you grab a jacket, Ted says, “...is that code for giving head?”

“Y’know, with how often you mention sucking dick, someone might think you’re the gay brother and not me.”

Ted grabs the back of your head and shoves you forward playfully, “Shut up.”

You laugh and step out of the apartment, head down to street level where Ted has parked his car. Waiting for you in the passenger seat, is your mom, who opens the door and gets out upon seeing you.

“N/N!” she greets you happily, immediately pulling you into a hug.

The three of you are soon off to the diner you’d picked out for brunch, worries about Schlatt meeting your mother quelled for now as you focus on spending time with your family. You can deal with your dickwad of a boyfriend later.

[lmanberg]

There's something endearing about schlinx (really don't care platonic or romantic) but I'm not sure what, I really can't put it into words, I guess I'm just a fan of the idea of two people who's whole brand is being agressive being soft? IDK, I'd love to hear your thoughts if you have any!

Bro when Minx got hit by the egg and Schlatt was just staring at her and all the stories their friends said about them like agreed it doesn’t matter if it’s platonic or not they’re so endearing

[brett-is-afraid]

schlinx is underrated as fuck tbh -♀️

You're actually so right. Also, I fully believe they are the definition of wlw and mlm people dating.

[omegawolverine]

i’d pick host bc you would think i would pick love and then i would send you a little kith 💌 bc i kin kenny mccormick ♥️

we would end up in our schlinx arc after one (1) love or host simply bc we both kin one half of crenny 😐 destined for bad things

[raan-miir-tah]

Schlinx 😍💕/j

[klowningkiddo]

Do you ship Schlinx?

Answer carefully.

wh

what incited this question

like do i just give off the vibes or whatever

i mean i dont but now im curious