#she has her own little house and it’s not much but it’s her very own

[livwritesstuff]

i’ve been sick at home for two days so here have a sick-fic (steddie!dads edition, obv)

It took three weeks from the first day of school for one of Steve and Eddie’s daughters to bring home some strain of elementary school illness – the flu, Steve's pretty sure, though who really knows? Whatever it is, It’s been knocking the family out one by one over the last week. Three-year-old Hazel had been the last man standing for a while, but she woke up this morning with a pretty gnarly cough and no appetite whatsoever, which can mean only one thing:

Random elementary school sickness: 5.

Harrington Family: 0.

So today is a sick day – yet another, because Steve hasn’t been to work all week, same with the girls and school.

Growing up, Steve had liked sick days, when he’d stay home from school and watch TV and eat ice cream on the couch while his mom doted on him all day.

(Then Steve’s dad had an affair and ruined everything, but that’s a whole other thing).

He wants to replicate for his daughters one of very few fond memories he has of his own childhood, so, yeah, the girls have been livin’ large the last few days (as large as three sick little kids can, anyway). They’re piled onto the couch under all kinds of blankets, eating meals of popsicles and toast and crackers, and watching all kinds of junky TV while they doze in and out of sleep.

Steve can admit that having sick kids is not his favorite facet of parenting, but even though he's totally wiped and the house is a wreck, he can't help but find the silver lining anyway because the girls are extra cuddly when they're sick, even nine-year-old Moe who might be nearing the end of the phase in life where she'll allow her dads to cuddle with her, so they've been asking for snuggles and stories, and Steve's fever-brain is running a little slower than usual so he's been taking the time to appreciate how much he loves being a dad, even in the not-so-fun moments.

The older two are sacked out on the couch with Dinosaur Train playing quietly in the background when Eddie decides the brave the real world for a much-needed grocery run. Hazel is awake still, and she wanders after Steve as he attempts to work through the mountain of laundry that has been building up over the last week.

"Wanna help me make dinner?" he asks her as he shoves a final t-shirt into the washing machine.

She shrugs her little shoulders.

"Not hungry," she says.

"Not hungry?" Steve repeats, and he silently curses his childrens’ elementary school for not being as strict as they could be in handling the spread of the flu across its students.

Still, Hazel ends up standing on a chair at the kitchen counter and helping him “cook” (dump three cans of Campbell's into one pot and heat it over the stove – and he won't be taking any criticism on it either, Tracy Baker, who's claiming to still be making homemade meals even though her family's in the exact same boat).

Eddie returns from the store just as Steve is pulling the pot of chicken noodle soup off the burner.

"Bold choice to have the most freshly sick kid help with dinner," Eddie comments, his eyes on Hazel as he sets grocery bags onto the counter.

Steve looks over just in time to see Hazel’s feeble attempt at blowing on the hot, steaming soup turn into a pretty spectacular toddler-cough right into the pot.

“Christ, no wonder we can’t shake this thing,” Eddie continues, looking vaguely impressed.

“Eh, I’ll stick it on the stove for another fifteen. It’ll probably boil off.”

[fortheloveoffanfic]

What if this is the last time I see you?

Hozier x fem!reader

Author's note: I'm sorry that I haven't finished one angsty story before forcing another onto you. But this one is shorter, I promise.

Summary: A chance run-in between exes at the farmers market leaves Andrew wondering if he’ll be okay never seeing Y/n again. Part 1 of 2.

Warnings: ANGST

At first, Andrew thinks his eyes must be playing tricks on him. But the longer he stares, the more it makes sense – and the more it makes sense, the more he is convinced. A pop-up farmers market, a fruit vendor selling an assortment of brightly coloured, sure-to-be sweet, freshly picked fruit. Or so he says.

She’s wearing a jacket that he swears he’s seen before, but it could’ve very well been on a mannequin in a store front and not in her closet – or on her body.

But he’s certain that its her. She’s carrying the basket in a way that’s all too familiar. She’s looking at strawberries and those are her favorite in the summer. It must be her.

So it must be divine intervention that he drove past the farmers market and decided to stop, because Andrew usually gets his produce at the grocery store, on the occasion that he’s home for long enough to do his own shopping.

Setting down the bright, glossy apple he’d been holding onto for a criminally long period, he inches towards her little section of the booth, debating what he should say. ‘Hi’ doesn’t feel like enough, but he fears that if he takes a chance with anything more he might stomp all over their impromptu reunion. He doesn’t want to be too much;

What a funny thought, he thinks. Considering the whole reason for their end was because he wasn’t enough.

Well, that might be a bit of an unfair distribution of blame. He’s pretty good at playing the victim where the demise of their relationship is concerned.

By the time he reaches her, Y/n has already placed a few strawberries into a plastic baggie and is looking for a few more to round off her purchase. And he settles on the very measly and shamefully uneventful; “hey.”

Surprised, Y/n jumps slightly and twists to face him, eyes going wide. “Andy, oh my gosh, hey.” She hesitates for a moment before reaching out for a hug that becomes quite a clumsy endeavor. They don’t seem to know each other as well as they used to; he can’t tell if she’s reaching for his neck or midsection, so their limbs get tangled in a strange manner. “Sorry,” she mumbles bashfully when the whole thing goes on for longer than any ‘I haven’t seen you in five years’ hug should take.

Shrugging off the unwarranted apology, Andrew stuffs his hands into the pockets of his dark jeans in an effort to keep himself from touching her again. “How have you been?” He tries to sound nonchalant, but his gaze drips to her left hand, looking for any sign of a ring. And when there isn’t one, he feels a knot in his chest loosen a little.

“I’ve been….” Y/n trails off, as if the question is the hardest one she’s been asked in a while. In some ways, she supposes it is. Is she supposed to lie to Andrew? Tell him she’s fine and happy and her life is going fantastically well when the truth is she hasn’t been able to scrub the memory of him from her mind and she still buys his favorite brand of tea because when it brews, the smell makes her house feel a little more like home. “I’ve been alright,” its something between the truth and any lie she can tell; she is alright. Alive and healthy, if only a little sad sometimes – but who isn’t, right? “You?”

Andrew fumbles with his words, he’s not sure why but the question feels almost taunting. Why would she throw that back to him? Why wouldn’t she just assume that she’s stowed the best of him into a box and taken it along with her? Everyone else sees it, they tell him he hasn’t looked the same since she left, that he talks differently and he’s truly a little depressing to be around sometimes. “I’m…..okay.” Just okay – not good, not bad, but somewhere in limbo, surviving.

At his response, Y/n nods absently. God, he wishes he knew what that meant. He wishes he still knew her well enough to know what anything she does means. There used to be things that only he understood about Y/n. There’s a version of her in his mind that still whispers in the dark, even if they’re the only people in the room, and ensures all the cutlery in the drawer is packed in the same direction. There’s a version of her that might have tilted her head at his response, and told him that she knows that ‘okay’ is never just ‘okay.’

But this is someone else, someone he doesn’t know. But he loves her anyway.

He’ll love every version of her. But at least he’s only lost one.

“You’re probably the last person I’d expect to run into, here especially,” but maybe she doesn’t really know him that well anymore. Maybe he goes to the farmer’s market every Sunday now and they’ve just been missing each other.

Maybe he goes with his girlfriend - a wife even -and right now she's at another vendor. She's going to be back soon. And she'll be beautiful and Y/n will think; no wonder he let me go so easily, because he knew there was better was out there.

Shaking off the unsettling thought, Y/n adds, “you used to get everything at the grocery store.”

“You used to grow everything yourself,” he notes, not maliciously though. It's really just an innocent observation; he wonders why she stopped.

“I guess…..we’ve changed,” Y/n muses, and a little sliver of her wonders if they’ve changed enough to make it work for a second time around.

“Not too much, I hope,” but what he really means to say is; ‘I hope we’re still the kind of people that can love each other.’ “Ehm,” he clears his throat softly, and finally gathers the courage to ask what he’d been thinking about since he discreetly examined her finger, “seeing anyone?”

What a question! Simultaneously, it makes her want to laugh and cry. “Not right now, no.” Of course, she’s seen other people since their break-up, but nothing ever sticks, and that might be because every man is now measured to Andrew; does it taste the same when they kiss her? Hold her hand the way he used to? Do they tell the same sort of jokes or thread their fingers through her hair before falling asleep? “What about you?”

Andrew waves his hand dismissively, “no one serious,” there isn't really anyone at all, but he doesn’t want to seem like he’s a complete wreck and one more white lie can’t hurt.

“Good,” the word slips out almost without thought, and Y/n quickly shakes her head when Andrew arches a brow. He isn't supposed to know that she's relieved; that he just quashed one of her biggest fears - that there's another woman that knows him as well as she does, but couldn't love him half as much, “well....not good. Just you know….you’re good at being on your own,” he was pretty damn good on his own even when they lived in the same house, “so I’m sure you’re doing good,” god, she wishes she had stopped talking three minutes ago.

Hesitating, he bites his tongue as the urge to tell her that he's not okay and it's all her fault wells up. Didn’t she see the lie in his eyes when he said he was okay? Is he that much of a stranger to her now?

Again, Andrew shrugs halfheartedly, “I’ve been okay,” he repeats before pressing his lips into a thin line. He doesn’t trust himself to add anything more, because then he’ll say he still misses her and its been far too long for him to still be mourning an empty side of the bed and the sound of her laughter in the drawing room.

He shouldn’t still go into his home studio and still expect her to come trailing after him, armed with a book with the intention of curling up on the sofa that gets just the right amount of noon sun. He shouldn't miss the way she looks while humming along softly to what he's working on, blanket draped on her folded legs, hazy light washing her face - he shouldn’t have left her blanket there after all this time.

He shouldn’t even be thinking about it, because the more he does, the more he wants to tell her. Beg Y/n to come back – to take him back because he’s really only half himself without her.

“I should let you –”

“You probably have –”

“Sorry.” Another clumsy, awkward apology, this one in aching unison. There’s silence for a while, and Y/n tugs her lower lip between her teeth. In a way, it feels like they’ve been standing there for too long, at least, like this. Not knowing what to say to each other, with the nails of her free hand digging into her palm so she doesn’t reach out to touch his arm. It shouldn’t be like this, she never wanted them to come to this; reduced to two awfully familiar strangers. “I should um….I have to….go…” She goes to say home, but the word doesn’t come, “I gotta go, Andrew.”

Swallowing the lump that’s been caught in his throat since he first saw fifteen minutes earlier, Andrew nods stiffly. “Of course,” he breathes. The last thing he wants is for her to leave, but he doesn’t really have any right to keep her. “I’ll leave you to it.” They both nod that time, shy and unsure but no one leaves. Not immediately. His eyes stay matching hers, and there’s a hundred things weighing down the tip of his tongue, but clinging to it like molten sugar.

I'm sorry I let you walk out, I'm sorry about everything. I still keep your ring in my nightstand, just in case. My mom still asks about you. I should've been better, let you in and I know that now. I'd do it now. I'm actually horrible on my own now, because you've ruined me in the best way - and the worst. But he doesn't say any of it; the moment is long gone and his pride does a pretty good job at keeping him quiet.

A shuddered breath escapes her lips upon realizing that she actually hasn’t moved an inch; Y/n doesn’t think she can be the one to bring herself to leave this time. She doesn't want to turn her back to him again. So she lingers, and she swears roots are sprouting from the soles of her feet, keeping her in place, staring into his eyes because lost in them is suddenly the only place she wants to be.

“I should go,” he eventually determines, glancing away. Though, the minute he says it, Andrew is lashed with immediate regret; he does not want to go. He doesn’t want to leave, but he suspects that this time its entirely on him to turn around and walk away.

“Right, right,” Y/n blinks quickly, then, just as he’s about to turn, she interjects, if only for the purpose of holding him there a little longer, “it was really nice seeing you.”

He nods, but doesn’t say anything, not right then. Though, when he turns away and starts retreating to the other end of the small tent, squinting his eyes at the midday sun, catching him square in the face, he pauses. Throwing a cautious backwards glance her way, he finds that Y/n has returned to picking out strawberries and on a whim, Andrew finally allows himself a singular moment of weakness – perhaps in a way of giving her what she’s wanted since their very last fight. “I’ve missed you,” he utters.

Y/n’s head snaps up just as she hands the bag over to the vendor for weighting, “what?” Her brows are furrowed and her lips are slightly agape.

Hating the sudden vulnerability that comes with those three little words, he shakes his head, “nothing. I’ll see you around,” he spares her a short wave, and she does the same.

After that, not a single word is traded between them again; Y/n pays, plops the bag into her basket, and walks off, and he watches her go. There’s a sinking feeling in his chest as she weaves her way through the busy market, and there’s a strange sort of finality in the moment where the last inkling of her green jacket disappears.

What if he never sees her again? What if that moment, in that tent, surrounded by fruits honeyed by summer’s warmth and the bitter heartache of something unfinished, constitutes the last fifteen minutes they will ever share?

What if she’s gone from his life forever and he’s damned to an eternity spent looking at her pictures and never hearing her voice again? Wondering what she’s doing and if she’s finally moved on from him?

Can he survive it? Truly? Without feeling like a shell just being shuffled around by the wind?

Returning to the assortment of ruby-toned apples, he struggles to escape the onslaught in his mind and Andrew finds himself unable to choose any, not even one, so he goes with strawberries instead.

To be continued.....

[haladriel]

so now we know his backstory I’m going to make a case for why Saurbrand didn’t think twice about abandoning Diarmid to his death for his own gain, but for some reason, only days or weeks later, dove to save Galadriel.

We are shown in season two that Sauron is mercenary and super calculating; he sizes everyone up for the best way to use them to further his own aims. And the way he’s now treating everyone else shows how different he was with Galadriel.

Diarmid’s fate shows Sauron’s ‘default’ — despite all Diarmid’s done for him in giving him a new perspective and offering him a new direction, when the situation veers a hard left, he wastes no time adapting and thinks nothing of acting strategically and taking the pouch. After all, Diarmid’s conveniently dying, and unlikely to survive a shipwreck anyway, what else is there to gain in service of his goals and nature that’s worth as much as a royal persona to adopt?

When you set this against how he treats Galadriel (i.e. didn’t leave her to die, which he very easily could’ve done), you’ve got to ask: what’s going on in there?

Maybe he thought he could use her: she’s a lot more skilled and important than Diarmid. She’s certainly proven herself capable in the sea-wyrm attack, where he no doubt values skill and competence in service of creating perfection and order, and keeping someone as powerful as her close is a wise political move. He very likely thought he could manipulate her, although he didn’t know how, or to what ends, quite yet.

Maybe he was simply interested in her. A member of the Golden House of Finarfin, out on the open sea? Since when? He might’ve guessed at the reason why; knowing that she was in the right direction for Valinor. An elf who has turned down the opportunity to go home? Unheard of.

Maybe, it’s the beginning of seeing himself reflected in her, when she sympathises with him about all he’s lost. He found himself being honest with her, in a way that he later does with no other; their first exchange on the raft was the beginning of that pattern. Maybe he is attracted to her, in this way.

Maybe it’s because why the hell not. At this point in the (now filled in) backstory, he is down and out and taking chances. Because his plan is going so well. And maybe the sea (Valar) will reconsider obliterating them if he shows some sign of repentance, holds a hand up. Maybe he knows the storm is for him, and feels some kind of ire and vitriol — ‘up yours’ — towards the Valar (‘that’s unnecessary, you heavy-handed bastards’) that they’re taking her out, as a part of that.

Maybe, it’s all of the above. And also, maybe, it’s because he’s already seeing some of that light he’s so fascinated by. In her kindness, her offering of sympathy to a stranger. And also, at this time, finds that he resonates with things she’s saying as much as vice versa. ‘You’re running. Whether towards or from something, I haven’t yet decided.’ After all, at this point, he’s temporarily diverted from his own crusade to get revenge on Adar; possibly running to, or away, from the Valar.

‘The way I see it, it wasn’t elves that chased me from my homeland. It was orcs.’ Turns out, it literally was. He’s really pissed off with his old family at this point and potentially (even just a little bit) wondering if there’s a better way. When he tells her the enemy is in the Southlands… they are. His enemy.

When you were betrayed by your closest, and everything’s gone to shit, and you meet someone who feels so similar to you, but who radiates light instead… how could you not be fascinated?

When everything you irrevocably are can be used in a different way, for a different purpose?

So he dives to save her.

(contributors to this thought train @multifandumbmeg @scifitheywrote)

[mistriavalley]

The storm behind your eyes (Sebastian x reader)

Note: It's the first time I've written smut on English so I rlly hope this turned out at least decent lmao

TW: 18+ smut MDNI, fingering, reader has a vagina, no protection, exhibitionism, mentions of smoking and cigarettes, slight angst

Masterlist

It was one of those dark days in summer when the rain pattered loudly against the windows and the thunder exploded deafeningly over the roofs. Fortunately, this didn't bother your farm animals too much. They were accustomed to the valley's unpredictable weather.

But it was strange to stay at home at times like this. Normally, you spent the whole day outside, running around Pelican Town like a headless chicken, trying to get all your tasks done as quickly as possible. Your fingertips were tingling with an urge for action and you tigered back and forth through your house.

There was one person in the village who was always out and about in such piss weather though. While the streets were empty, Sebastian took advantage of the solitude and went out for some fresh air.

I wonder if he went out to the beach in this storm?

But not even he was that crazy. Then you remembered that usually, when thunder and lightning came together to create a dance of chaos and destruction in the sky, he smoked a pack of cigarettes under a tree near the mountain lake. Yes. How very smart of him.

You threw a raincoat over your shoulders and hid your face deep inside the hood. Through the mud, you struggle up the hill and stumble past Robin's house. The warm light from the lamps inside shone through the glass of the windows and illuminated the path before you. You dared to take a peek inside.

There they sat around the table. Robin, Demitrius and Maru were all smiles and giggles. It was nothing new to see them without Sebastian, but it still filled you with a deep sadness. You were very much aware of how excluded he felt from his family and it never seemed like any of them were even attempting to try and close the gap between them.

Maru was an exception though. You have caught her several times staring at Sebastian during festivals as if she wasn't sure if she was allowed to approach him. And of course you didn't miss how she calls him her brother while he always made sure to emphasize the word "half" when he referred to her as his half-sister.

You continued walking towards the lake and took shelter under the thick branches of a pine tree. Funny. This was actually Sebastian's quiet little spot when he contemplated the meaning of life while ruining his lungs. Sometimes you got the feeling that he was taking himself a little too seriously.

You turned on your own heels, your eyes searching for the all too familiar mop of black hair. After a few seconds, you spotted him on the complete opposite side and you fought your way through the wet dirt once again.

With only his hoodie as protection, he shielded his mouth with his hand as he desperately tried to keep the lighter's flame on. The wind combined with the rain was working successfully against the young man.

The way he flicked his thumb over the wheel of the lighter was frantic. That's when you noticed the deep crease between his dark eyebrows.

"Sebby?", you yelled over the rumble of the storm and he gave you a quick glance over his shoulder.

It was only a split second, but it was enough for you to know immediately that something was wrong with him. His eyes were darker than usual and it seemed as if the corners of his mouth had never pointed upwards once in his entire life.

You gently put your hand on his back and felt the tension in his muscles. Sighing, he lowered the lighter and put the cigarette back in the box. He was probably now aware that it was impossible to smoke in this shit weather.

Neither of you said a word for a long time. You knew that Sebastian sometimes took a while before he was ready to talk about his feelings when he was this down. While other people's moods hit rock bottom, he was the type to grab a shovel and dig the hole even deeper.

"I've come to terms with being the black sheep in my family. The mistake.", he said in a broken voice.

You nodded. Yes, that was usually the reason why he'd hide out here. He had confided in you a little later in your friendship that he had a difficult relationship with Demitrius and that was why he had kept his distance from Robin and Maru as well. However, only you and Sam knew about it and you had sworn to keep it to yourself.

Sebastian balled his hands into fists. His shoulders shook violently, as if he was crying, but not a single tear formed in his eyes. Afterwards it was as if a dam broke inside him and the words just came pouring out of him.

"Mom doesn't even seem to notice this shit or doesn't want to notice it! No matter what I do, it's not good enough for any of them, but Maru, on the other hand, could burn the whole fucking place down and they'd all just shrug with their shoulders."

Sebastian took a deep breath.

"But Yoba forbid I drop even a teaspoon! Demitrius is giving me a hard time while he rolls out the damn red carpet for his perfect little girl."

You reached for his hands and squeezed them comfortingly, a look of understanding on your face. He immediately relaxed and leaned his forehead against your shoulder, defeated.

"I hate everything.", he whispered into your neck. Your hair stood on end as his hot breath tickled your skin.

For a moment, you felt something like butterflies in your stomach and you silently scolded yourself. This really wasn't the time to think about your feelings for him. Not when he was in such a vulnerable state and needed a pillar.

"No, that's not true. You don't hate everything.", you said and stroked the back of his hand with your thumb. When you said this, you were actually referring to Sam. His best friend.

But what Sebastian answered completely threw you for a loop and left you speechless.

"I don't hate you. Honestly, you're like a light in the darkness. I don't know what I'd do without you."

Heat rose to your face and you didn't know what to say. You decided the smartest move was to keep your mouth shut before you could fabricate something utterly embarrassing and then had to dig your own grave.

Sebastian touched your neck fleetingly with his lips. It made you shiver. Your body automatically inched closer to his. Your brain short-circuited and your instincts took over. Everything in you longed for him. You wanted more than just his mouth on your neck.

Images of his naked torso flashed past your inner eyes. Images of him slowly kissing his way down on you.

You gasped involuntarily and Sebastian turned towards your face. The distance between you was just big enough for a sheet of paper. For the first second, he just stared into your eyes. His expression was unreadable. Then the next second, his mouth crashed against yours in a heated kiss.

He kissed you like a diver catching his breath again after being submerged for far too long. He kissed you like a stranded man getting ahold of a glass of water for the first time in ages. Your body burned more with every passing moment.

"I want you. Please. I don't know if I can wait any longer." The pleading in his words was hard to ignore.

"Sebastian, you're not thinking clearly right now." Although part of you cursed yourself out for saying that, you were right. Sebastian was hurt. That's why he was acting like this now. It's not like he was genuinely interested in you.

He shook his head so violently that the rainwater in his hair flew around him.

"I've never thought as clearly in my life as I do now." To emphasize his words, he pressed another hungry kiss to your mouth.

Soon after, he grabbed you by the hand and together you ran through the storm towards the mines. It was chilly between the high stone walls, but the heat in your chest made it bearable.

Sebastian hastily pulled the hoodie over his head and spread it out on the ground. A slight blush appeared on his cheeks and he avoided your gaze.

"For you. I don't want to just take you on some dirty ground."

Granted, the mines weren't exactly the most romantic place for your first time together, but damn. You'd be lying if you said you hadn't fantasized about sleeping with him outside the house at least once.

In fact, the idea had even plagued your dreams countless times. While you wrapped your arms around each other again, he carefully placed you on his sweater. Always making sure you didn't hit your head on the hard floor.

His soaked T-shirt stuck tightly to his torso and it took all four hands to somehow get it off. He looked so much better than you had imagined.

His warm hand found it's way under your own clothes and you felt a familiar warmth spread between your legs. The rest of your clothes were tossed carelessly into some dusty corner after a short while.

You arched your back to be as close to him as possible as he devoured you with his lips. His tongue playfully stroked your own and you rubbed your thighs together to create at least a little bit of friction. 

Your mind raced and your heart pounded in your throat as the cave was filled with the sound of your gasps and moans. Then, finally, you felt Sebastian's finger at your entrance.

He slowly pushed in one. Shortly afterwards, the second followed and he moved them in a curling motion. After a few attempts, he found your g-spot and you threw your head back.

His hot breath hit your cheek as he showered your face with kisses. And as if he wasn't doing enough, he placed his thumb on your clit and massaged it in circles. 

It was as if all the air had been sucked out of your lungs and you saw nothing but stars. Where on earth had he learned these things?

But that was a question for another time. At that moment, it was simply impossible to grasp a clear thought. All you could focus on was Sebastian's fingers inside and on you.

Something in your stomach tightened in a pleasant way and you grabbed his face with both hands to pull him down for a kiss. You desperately tried to muffle your moans with his lips and tongue.

A short time later you came on his hand and your hips trembled. It took you quite a while to get off your high and when Sebastian pulled his fingers out of you, you winced. You were so sensitive that even the slightest touch made you jump.

A wide, proud grin spread across his handsome face as he looked at you. You didn't even want to begin to imagine what you looked like now, stretched out like a starfish and as sweaty as a marathon runner.

But there was nothing but affection in Sebastian's gaze. Affection and lust. His hard cock laid heavy on your stomach and your energy came rushing back to you.

You sit up and push him down onto his back. A surprised look formed on his features.

"What-", he started, but fell silent as you reached for his dick.

It was wide and veiny. Your wetness ran down the inside of your thigh and dripped onto his stomach. Precum leaked out of his tip and you leaned down to lick it up.

He let out a whimper. As you moved your hand slowly up and down his shaft, you positioned yourself over him and took the entire length in. He filled you to the brim and stretched you in a way that both hurt and felt wonderful.

Sebastian whimpered and gasped. He tensed up and looked like he was going through the fight of his life right now.

"Give me a second. Don't move or I'll-", he pleaded and grunted before he could finish his sentence.

Pride filled your chest. You had no idea about the effect you had on his man, but now you see it in it's whole glory. How hot and bothered he was and how much he was struggling to not come right then and there.

After what felt like an eternity, you started to move your hips up and down to test the waters. Everything inside you wanted to go faster, to ride this man until he was a screaming mess, but you felt merciful.

Then something inside Sebastian clicked and he grabbed you by the hips as he drilled into you. The wet slapping of skin against skin echoed off the high walls of the cave as he fucked you senseless.

Once again, you could think of nothing but Sebastian. You braced yourself against his torso with one hand while you frantically rubbed your clit with the other. You wanted to come with him.

His movements became sloppier and his eyebrows were drawn together in concentration. He was so close and so were you. A wave of ecstasy crashed over your whole body and moments later his cock twitched violently inside of you. A warm liquid was filling you up to the point where you even moaned from the slight pressure.

For a brief moment you thought it would never end until his dick finally came to a complete rest. Sebastian, who looked like he had seen Yoba with his on two eyes just now, slid out of you.

You made yourself comfortable next to him on his hoodje while he wrapped his arms around you and placed a gentle kiss on your forehead.

"I don't know why we didn't do this before.", he commented.

"When should we have done it? When I first introduced myself or what?"

"That would actually be a fantastic first impression."

You give him a slap on the chest, but he just laughs. You two lay there for a long time, listening to the falling raindrops.

"It's a good thing we did it in this thunderstorm. The adventurers and maybe even Linus would have heard us," he remarked.

"Oh my Yoba. You're right."

What escaped you, however, was the fact that a (now very traumatized) dwarf had his store only a few meters away from you guys.

[shxxxbi]

EVERYTHING THAT WASN'T INCLUDED IN LOVE SEA THE SERIES 🌊

Episode 4 (Chapters: 12 - 14)

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Breaking a promise

Rak felt like shit here. He had called Mook to extend his stay but his secretary had refused sternly; so after Mut spent two nights pleading for him to stay, Rak tried to find an excuse to keep his promise. He considered telling his secretary that the manuscript wasn't finished, that he needed more time, even considered telling her all the boats had sunk and it was impossible for him to go back to the mainland. But in the end, he had no choice but to admit defeat. He felt terrible for breaking his promise to Mut, meanwhile the younger boy appeared almost unfazed. His face was "just the usual, totally normal one, with the usual smile and the same look. Not a hint of regret."

"If he didn't care, then why would I?"

So Rak picked up his phone and transfered Mut the money for "his services". Now more than ever, Tongrak was convinced that all that had happened between them was just sex. Mut sold his service and Rak had bought it. Nothing he hadn't already done before with other people...

...yet, Rak had "never felt this hollow"

How much would it cost for you to go to Bangkok with me?

That hollow feeling in Rak's chest kept expanding. Memories of the time spent together with Mut flashed through his mind until a sudden warmth urged him to move. Tongrak was confident in his decision, in asking Mut to go with him. However, he still insisted that what he was feeling was not love. That it was just personal pleasure. And if he could afford it, what was the problem?

"The guy sold his service anyway. Right?"

WHAT!!!??

She didn't like this man at all. That's what Mook kept telling herself when she saw the man her boss had brought back with him. He made her feel "as tiny as an ant". Mook had screamed so loud upon hearing what Rak had done, that the airport staff almost came over to ask what was wrong.

"Brought back, as in purchasing?! Are people buying and selling men now?!"

I don't trust you

Mook wanted to back down the moment she met eyes with Mut. She wasn't familiar with men at all, the only men she was close with were her family members and Rak. Mut intimidated her, with his big body and his dark and scary face, so much so it made her want to cry. But no one could be trusted this days, what if this man assaulted Rak? What if he stabbed her boss with a knife in his sleep?

"She had to protect Rak!"

Mut, on the other hand, found her amusing. She was so small, he could "probably blow her away with a puff". But he was never one to bully someone weaker, so he turned to Rak.

"What should i do? If I show respect, she won't back down. But if you tell me to handle her, this little lady won't stand a chance."

Little Trivia: Rak's house

Contrary to the show, Rak's house is on the 27th floor of a very luxurious condo complex in the heart of Bangkok. It has 3 bedrooms, with the main one featuring a large wall window that offered a wonderful view of the bustling streets below. As for the other two bedrooms, one is a guest bedroom and the other one a study crammed with books. As for the kitchen, it is entirely made of Italian marble and has, basically, never been used.

Bro, are you crazy?!

This phone call actually happens after Rak and Mook have already set off to work. Mook had been waiting outside the door to Rak's house as soon as the sun was up, too terrified to enter on her own and find the two men fucking in the living room, so she waited for Mut to let her in. After the secretary and her boss had left, Mut gets a call from Palm. The younger boy kept shouting and calling him crazy, but Mut knew very well what he was doing. Many people would describe him as very mature for his age, but Mut knew he still tended to act childish at times. Just like he had done now. Following a man to the mainland with no plan whatsoever, simply because he was unwilling to let him go. Mahasamut knew that their paths would most likely never cross again, this was the only opportunity he had to keep Tongrak close. And he would not let it go.

Little Trivia pt.2: Mahasamut's age

Mut's age is never explicitly confirmed in the novel, however thanks to Khom we can figure it out. In "Love Sand", the story of Khom and Connor meeting and falling in love takes place when Khom is 19 years old. Many characters of Love Sea appear as side characters, including Palm and Mut. Palm is described as a boy around 17 years old, while Mut is "a few years older than him and around Khom's age". Fast forward to Love Sea (that chronologically takes place a while after the events of Love Sand), Mut describes Khom as his "younger close friend and brother". Also, in the prologue of Love Sea, Tongrak tells us that Khom is a decade younger than him. Since Rak is about to turn 31 and the two boys are around the same age, with Mut being apparently slightly older, Mahasamut should be around 21-22 years old, making the age gap between Mutrak around 9 or 10 years!

DISCLAIMER🚨: I have not read Love Sand, all the infos I have written come from people I know that have read it. Therefore, I apologize if something is incorrect🙇🏽‍♀️

Can you read the report and understand it?

Fortunately for Mook, Mahasamut had decided to go to the hospital alone and not drag her along. Said report was currently being examined by Tongrak and poor Mook couldn't help but wonder why her boss was smiling like that. How could a report make him so happy? She didn't understand anything of what was written, she didn't know a thing about STDs. How could she, she had never even had sex with anyone. Her confusion faded when Mahasamut explained he was clean, only to be quickly replaced by embarrassment at his next words.

"Maybe next time we can skip the rubber. I promise I'll pull out"

Yet, nothing could prepare her for Rak's answer

"Who said you have to?"

Mut kept teasing Mook for a while after that, while Rak observed them in the distance

"They get along very well. This is nice. The room isn't quiet anymore."

What if I say I won't agree to it?

Mut read the contents of the contract: Tongrak would provide him sixty thousand bahts monthly as compensation and cover all of his living expenses, including housing, food and even education, if he wished to pursue it. However, Mut had obligations as well: not disturbing Rak during working hours, not doing anything Tongrak disliked and, most of all, their relationship would end immediately at the writer's discretion. There was no love, nor commitment included. Mahasamut had to supress a growl in his throat. He disliked what Rak was doing, disliked how he was treating their relationship as if there was nothing but sex between them, nothing but money. But he knew this was the only opportunity he had to get close to Tongrak and he couldn't let it slip away, even if he wouldn't have much time. So, all he could do was clench his fists and hide his thoughts with a perfectly fine smile.

So, you're saying you can love me, Khun Tongrak?

Being very fair-skinned, when all his blood rushed to his face, Rak easily turned a bright red that let everyone know he was blushing. And Mut's words had him blushing hard. Tongrak had experienced every kind of flirtation imaginable from both men and women, but just a few words from Mut were enough to leave him speechless. Had the younger boy not read the contract? Had he not realized there was no emotional attachment between them, only money? How could he be so brazen in asking for love? But, most of all, why the hell did Rak's heart skip a beat?!

Vivi was very impressed by the island boy. She knew there must have been something special between them if Rak had brought him home; just as she knew how much her friend deeply craved for someone's love, even if he refused to admit it.

"You can just call me Vi, no prefix needed. And if Rak ever dumps you, just come to Big Sis. I like you."

"That might be difficult," Mut declined, "I won't let myself get dumped so easily"

And Mahasamut had never been more serious. He wouldn't let Tongrak drift away from him.

"I didn't say you could come in" "But you didn't say I couldn't come in either"

Here Mut actually enters Rak's room and sits on his bed, while the older man is busy playing on his phone. Unable to ignore Mut's gaze any longer, Rak put his phone down and looked up at him.

"That's better. Didn't anyone tell you that when you talk, you should make eye contact with the person you're talking to?"

Finally they talk about the contract, about their conversation downstairs and about how Rak doesn't believe in love, and this all but puts a sad smile on Mut's face. So, the younger boy reaches out to hold Rak's hand and intertwine their fingers.

"I know you don't believe in love, but I never said that I don't [...], you can't stop me from loving you."

Tongrak was at a loss for words. Confusion was written all over his face. He had never dealt with a situation like this before. He had never met anyone who said they'd love him.

👨🏻‍❤️‍💋‍👨🏻

THIS. THIS IS THE MOMENT I HAD BEEN WAITING FOR.

In the novel, this does NOT happen. Or, better said, it is not a kiss on the lips. It's a kiss on Rak's temple. Now, why am i putting so much emphasis on this, you might be asking. I think this is another masterpiece of improv by our ship captain Khun Thitipong. In the novel, there is A LOT of emphasis on the fact that Mut desperately wanted to kiss Rak's lips but, since he had just made a very important speech about pursuing Rak and making him change his mind about love, Mahasamut decided that he couldn't give in to his desire. He wanted the words he had just said to embed themselves in Rak's heart. To make Rak think about him, about them, as more than just what happens in bed, and that is something that would take time. So kissing his lips had to wait. Now, after making this such a big thing, I don't think Mame would just suddenly change her mind for the show. Therefore, if 1+1 is 2 and the shit-eating grin on Fort's face and Peat's eyes are anything to go by, I assume Thitiwhipped decided to take matters into his own hands. Also, it seems Peat hinted at this himself in the reaction video for episode 4: after watching the kiss scene, Peat himself asks Fort if the kiss was scripted or just his improvisation.

Thank you for coming to my ted talk 🫳🏽🎤

[trippinsorrows]

looking through your eyes + short

a/n: angsty mess that's very multiverse based and somehow is 2 thousand freaking words....

----

"dada!"

one word. one word has easily become solana's favorite word in the entirety of the english language. a great feat considering her immense reverence and respect for the written word.

but, it's solely because unlike many of the other infinite words to exist, this one means so much to her. it means everything to her.

it's her world.

she is her world.

tearing her focus from the soapy water where she washes the dishes and pots from tonight's dinner, solana instead focuses on the sight that she would give anything to make her usual.

roman, this large specimen of a man, sitting on the floor, legs spread. he's dressed in some joggers, his shirt discarded, a small smile on his face as he speaks in a low voice to their 11-month-old daughter who wobbles in his direction.

it makes solana chuckle. melea rarely walks for her, prefers to crawl her cute self all over the house, if she could. but the minute her daddy comes around, she suddenly finds the ability and drive to use her legs.

solana studies the way roman reaches over to pick up melea, his own smile growing at the sound of his baby girl's sweet giggles as he lifts her up and plays with her.

eyes shutting, solana revels in this moment. does her best to stay in the here and now. tries not to think about tomorrow, about the absence of roman's body next to her in the bed, the crushing feeling of going into melea's crib, waking her up only for her to ask with those big, beautiful eyes, "dada?"

it kills her.

every. single. time.

sadness clouding her previous enjoyment, solana returns her focus to cleaning up the kitchen, instead focusing on making sure everything is put away and the dishes used are all sparkling clean.

it's an effective distraction, because by the time she's done, roman is sitting on the sofa, holding a sleeping melea.

small smile, she walks over to quietly sit down next to him, asking, "you want me to put her down?"

he looks over, shaking his head, "not yet."

she nods. she should have expected that. he enjoys spending as much time with her as he can when he can. for obvious reasons.

solana simply lays against the sofa, studying her daughter's sleeping face. as much as melea clearly loves her daddy, she looks so much like her mama. the most she has from roman is his dark hair color and those eyes. which solana has zero complaints about. of the many things she loves about her husband, his eyes rank pretty high up there.

"can you believe she's going to be one next month?" solana is both asking him and herself. it blows her mind sometimes just how quickly times has passed. continued to pass. her sweet little girl is going to be a year. it's been an entire year since solana became a mother.

roman chuckles, eyes focused on his daughter who sleeps so calmly on his chest. "not at all."

solana swallows, asking, "will you be here for her birthday?"

at that, his eyes turn to her, surprised almost, "of course." he then asks, almost defensively, "why?"

she shrugs, not wanting to feed too much into that defensiveness. "i never know when you're coming, ro."

"i wouldn't miss my daughter's first birthday, sol."

solana hates it. hates the bitter retort she has to do her best to suppress. to push away. it's cruel and uncalled for, but it's exactly how she feels.

clearing her throat, she carefully moves off the sofa, murmuring, "i'm gonna go take my shower."

she doesn't say anything else, already knowing he'll most likely have melea down and in bed by the time she gets out.

and that's exactly what happens, solana walking out the shower to find him sitting on the edge of the bed, phone in hand. as soon as he lifts his head to look at her, his phone is discarded, and he's motioning her to come over.

wordlessly, she walks in between his thick, muscular legs until his hands are on her hips.

solana bites down on her lip, more than eager to skip to the part where he makes love to her throughout the night, until both of them are completely spent, tangled limbs and souls intertwined.

but roman has something else on his mind, bringing up not even an hour ago. "you wanted to say something. earlier."

solana stills for a second. she should have known better. known he would pick up on it.

she shakes her head, moving her hands up and down his strong shoulders. "it doesn't matter."

"everything matters when it comes to you, solana," he reminds, again asking, "tell me."

looking away, she debates lying to him, but she already knows it's a stupid plan. there is no lying to her husband. he sees through everything.

so, she swallows her anxiety at how she believes or knows this conversation will play out and shrugs, "i was just....i was just going to say maybe....maybe it would be easier if we....if we could come live with you." it's in watching his eyes shut, the almost scowl on his face and especially the way he stands up, walking away, hands on his hip, that solana knows exactly how this is going to play out.

not well.

as per usual.

"baby....we've talked about this." solana hugs herself, already dreading it. "why do you keep bringing it up? where is this coming from?"

"where do you think it came from, roman?" she asks, shaking her head. "our daughter is turning one, and i had to ask you if you're going to be there for her birthday, because i never know when you have time for us and when you don't---"

he turns around at that, gaze sharp and steel. "don't do that. don't fucking do that. you know what you mean to me. what she means to me."

feeling emboldened, she challenges, "just not enough for us to actually live together like a family?"

roman's eyes soften ever so slightly as he once again expresses, "it's too danger---"

"God, i'm so sick and tired of hear that." she cuts him off, eyes closing, mentally replaying the many times she's heard as such. "i understand that, roman. i do, but what you don't seem to understand is how hard this is for me." solana doesn't know where exactly it's coming from, well, not entirely, but the restrain she typically uses when it comes to this sensitive subject is all but gone. "i wake up alone almost every night. i go to sleep alone. i wake up our daughter alone. i bring her to my mom's alone. god, i---roman, i attended every ultrasound appointment alone. you....you weren't even there for her birth."

it's a low blow. deep down, she knows that. doesn't need to see the hurt flash in his eyes at something she knows he'll never truly get over. but, that wasn't just hard for him. it was hard for her. one of the happiest days of her life was also the saddest, because while her mom was with her on one side, the other side where he should have been, helping and supporting her as she gave him his first child, was empty.

but, of course, he won't comment on that, won't talk about one of his most painful regrets. he instead deflects, granted with a gentleness reserved for her and their child..

his volume lowers as well. "sol, you knew it would be this way before---"

"you're right, i did." because she did. because he made her very aware from the very beginning that he could never openly be with her. it was too dangerous. he had far too many enemies and would never risk anything happening to her. she understood it then. still understands it now, especially with them having a baby. it just sucks though. "and i'm not...i'm not mad at you, ro. i'm just frustrated with the situation. i'm tired of feeling like a single mother---"

at that, she sees the pain melt into something much more familiar for most people acquainted with roman reigns.

she sees anger.

but, she knows it's really hurt. he's understandably hurt by her honesty.

"you're acting like i don't fucking do anything." his tone continues to stay in the lanes of harshness, which doesn't help her tone down her frustration. "i'm trying, solana."

"but, it's not enough, roman!" she doesn't intend to raise her voice. it's a natural consequence of the emotions that have been bubbling to the surface for some time now. eyes watering, she explains, "you've given me this beautiful house, yes. i want for nothing financially, yes. you have the fucking secret service it feels like watching me and mel, yes, but.....but, i still feel so alone." sniffling, she admits, "i feel like i love you full time, but you only love us part time. when you can. and that's not....that's not fair. it's.....it's starting to mess with me, roman."

the tears are inevitable at this point, and before she knows it, roman is before her, gently cupping her face, wiping away her tears. "baby, please don't cry." it fascinates her how only seconds ago he was being borderline mean only for him to shift so easily into this gentle man who she loves with every part of her. "i fucking hate seeing you upset. you know this."

he would have hated to see her last week when she truly broke down over all of this.

"sometimes, i....i wonder if we moved too fast." met, married, and pregnant within a year, most would say it was absolutely too fast. most don't know, however, just how deeply she loves this man. "is this what you want?"

"i love you, solana. i love melea. i would give fucking anything for things to be different, but i can't. i can't change who i am, and what i do." he swallows. "but, i can't lose you either, so tell me how we make this work."

the real answer is she doesn't know. she doesn't know the sustainability of this dynamic. sporadic visits from her husband who only a handful of people know is her husband as he visits her and a daughter even fewer people know exist. she wants to love and be in love openly and wholly. not in the shadows and corners of secrecy.

but, maybe that's another problem for another day, because what solana wants the most is to just be with this man. be with the man she's shared so many first with. first time. first love. first child. there is no her without him, and navigating that might be difficult, but she'll do it. because she'll do anything be with him.

"i love you." she murmurs and moves against his chest, letting him hold and comfort her as he murmurs those precious words back to her. it settles her. more than it maybe should, but she doesn't question it. pulling back, solana reaches for his hand, moving it to her stomach. "the first one....just please be there for the first appointment."

roman seems to understand what she's telling him, but he still wants an additional layer of reassurance. "are you...."

she nods. a small, sad smile sets on her face. "yes, and i....i just want you there with me to hear it. to hear our baby's heartbeat this time."

roman scoffs, clearly a mixture of emotions: surprised, confused, happy. he then nods, his own face settling into the perfect combination of determination and dedication. "i'll be there." he kisses her forehead, so gently, so lovingly, vowing, "we're gonna be fine, sol. i promise."

as he takes her in his arms yet again, showering her with all of his love and vulnerability, rare displays only allotted to her and melea, solana's eyes shut.

if only she felt the same.

if only she trusted that they would be okay.

that this will work out.

but, she's not.

she's just not.

[hollowed-theory-hall]

Hi! Idk if you’ve already spoke about this so sorry if you have but do you think that Harry can still speak parsletongue after he’s no longer a horcrux? And do you have any hcs about if theres any changes before vs after he’s no longer a horcrux?

Hi 👋,

Like, in canon, I don't recall it ever being mentioned in the books. But JKR did state in an interview he lost the ability to speak Parseltongue:

Nigel: Can harry speak parseltongue when he is no longer a horcrux? J.K. Rowling: No, he loses the ability, and is very glad to do so.

(Source)

The books don't really mention it, but they intend you to understand it as Harry not being able to speak Parseltongue anymore.

Personally, I like to headcanon he still can. Since it isn't book canon, but stated in an interview, it's pretty loose in canonicity.

Like, my headcanon regarding Harry's Parseltongue is that he wouldn't have been able to speak it if he didn't have a latent gene for it. Like, if a random wizard that had no recent enough Gaunts in their family tree to have the potential to be Parselmouths, became Voldemort’s Horcrux they wouldn't be Parselmouths. Like, I headcanon Lily's maternal grandma was a squib from the Gaunt family, and that's why Harry had a dormant Parseltongue gene that was just activated by becoming a Horcrux. So, he'd keep the ability after the Horcrux is no longer there since it just triggered a gene that was already there. I already talked about how most muggleborns are likely descendants of more recent squibs, so it's not only possible Lily has relatively recent magical ancestry, but likely (also, she has Slytherin green eyes, and was the one to really kill the Heir of Slytherin the first time, let her be a Gaunt).

I think Harry would feel weird after the Horcrux is no longer there. Lighter than he ever felt before. He'd think it's because the war is over and there aren't dark lords or Durlseys to mess with his life, but it isn't. His life likely is still quite stressful while rebuilding the wizarding world, and I think, he'd realize eventually the horcrux left him a little emptier. I think the moment he buries Voldemort and his wand would be the moment he realizes how much he feels the lack of the Horcrux.

I mean, imagine you have a certain amount of soul in you your entire life. Your body, your mind, your spirit, your own soul and magic, the very essence that is you, has recognized another as part of itself, got used to having more soul between your ribs than just your own. and then, in practically a blink of an eye, it's gone. I can't imagine you won't feel it. Like a phantom limb.

I don't think Harry's personality changes much after the Horcrux is removed. Like, I don't think his magic or the alliance of his wand would be affected by that. I think he'd be fine on that front. I think he'd just feel lighter. Emptier. I think his magic would be a bit off balance in the first few months until he got used to the new balance of his body and soul. And he'd just feel off. Like when you leave your house and you have the feeling you forgot something and you just don't know what — that, but constantly, and about your own soul.

I think the entire journey could be really fun in a fic that uses the loss of the Horcrux as a way to explore Harry's trauma from the war now that it's all over. He feels lighter, the weight he carried all his life is gone, but it leaves him empty and purposeless. That's why I think he would go back to 8th year — back home to find his balance.

[thecarnivorousmuffinmeta]

Doctor who question here, how do you feel about rose and the metacrisis doctor? What do you think their life would have been like, now that the doctor isn’t “the doctor” anymore?

You know interesting question for an interesting pair of people.

How Do I Feel?

To me, Rose and the Metacrisis Doctor was one of those gut punches of "oh, Doctor, no, you didn't, no".

The whole thing was that Rose's relationship, Rose's life, the person Rose was so desperately trying to reach and had lost so much of herself to save was the Doctor.

Metacrisis not only isn't him, but he's a mixture of the Doctor and a woman she's only met briefly: Donna Noble, who was one of her many replacements.

She's then told "Isn't this great, Rose? Now you can be with your One True Love: guy who looks like me but a little more ginger! It's what you always wanted" and she's expected to have her problems all solved and get to live happily ever after with this stranger who has his own ridiculous amount of baggage of being the Almost-Sort-Of-Doctor-And-Or-Donna-But-No-That's-Not-it-Either.

I love it, because it is so awful and is one of the many steps of awful of the tenth doctor journey (which is one from "I'M SO OPTIMISTIC AGAIN" to "OH GOD, THIS IS HORRIBLE").

What Is Their Life Like

Deeply uncomfortable.

See, both of them know the Doctor isn't the one Rose wants, and that Rose perhaps isn't what this Doctor who isn't the Doctor wants. Of course, Rose has to support him because what the fuck is he supposed to do sans TARDIS/place in the world, but it's like they're playing house together and they both know it.

(And sure, they're growing a new TARDIS, but that's going to take, you know, time, a lot of time and they're not exactly immortal.)

Neither can exactly blame the other, especially when the Doctor is the one who shoulders most of the blame there, but it would be remarkably painful to look at one another and know that things aren't quite right (Rose isn't to the Metacrisis Doctor what she was to the Doctor and similarly Metacrisis Doctor isn't the Doctor and never will be).

Maybe they get over this and they can forge their own new relationship, but it'd be very difficult, especially as the whole premise was supposed to be that Rose gets a Doctor who won't run off on her.

Hooray.

[northopalshore]

hi!! i recently found out my due date for my daughter, can you tell me what pisces sun aries moon is like?

Awww, congratulations!! 🥹🫶🏻🫧

She'll be a very sensitive kid, kind and sweet, she may be stuck in her own world at times. You might worry about her often, aries moons usually have mothers who are very goal driven & independent you will always push her to be her best self. (Also wanting the best of the best)

You'll notice that she'll be a little rebellious at times i.e stubborn lol. I'm sure with proper communication both of you will learn to see from each other's perspective soon enough.

I also recommend looking at her other personal planets and degrees a few months after she's born to look at more specific details of her personality!

There may be some constraint between you because of her aries moon as well but the degree it's in also make a big difference. The house it's in will tell you what she may associate you with or things she saw you focused around a lot. It's also something she will internalise into adulthood.

Aries moon is a "Tiger mom" placement.

1st House: Competitions (Aries moons usually have pretty competitive mothers in general but in this house it may seem like all you see in comparison/competition to her), sports, body image, control

2nd House: Money, materialistic, debts, speaking, singing (Taurus ruled)

3rd House: Communication, school, children, being busy in general, thinking

4th House: Homelife, house, kitchen, how your house looks, being at home, family, emotions

5th House: Creativity, arts, performances, school, children

6th House: Work, chores, house, cleanliness , hygiene

7th House: Relationships, marriages, business, partnerships, exes

8th House: Constantly changing, instability, forceful energy ( you may have a karmic relationship with your daughter), obsession, control, death/losses, debt

9th House: Travel, religion, distance, higher studies, education

10th House: Career, status, ambitions, obstacles

11th House: Friends, society, social life, environment, charity, internet

12th House: Religiousness, she may feel like you're always away from her life, she may feel distant from you in general.

For example: My moon is Aries (28° cancer) in the 2nd house. My mother has always made me join all sorts of competitions (usually involving speaking or communicating) from a very young age.

I've always seen her struggling with money and finances. Our relationship has had a lot of turbulence from both ends; her forcing her way & and myself refusing to comply (arguing).

Still I feel like I can't live without her because of the degree that it's in. She genuinely cares for me as her daughter, and I see that. As much as we may butt heads I still have a very close mother daughter bond.

Being a mother is very difficult, so don't put too much pressure on yourself. There's no "one true way" a mother should be. Just trust your instincts and listen to your child as not every child is the same as the other! May all go well for your pregnancy!

Hope this helps ♡

[icarusredwings]

you ever think about well.. better than the alternative being a wade song? like,, guy who thinks he's broken wanting to be a good father and someone who can be loved.. like it's him isn't it?

First. This is my 1001th post, and Im up to 506 followers! Thank you, everyone, for everything!

Secondly- Congrats. You made me cry. I litsened to this and thought about it very deeply. Its something thats always resonated with me becuse I KNOW the voices in his head are constantly having anxiety on whether or not Ellie is going to get herititary cancer or not and itll he all his fault. If she'll get herititary mental illness. He worries if HIS own mental illness is going to prevent him from being a father. He spirals in so much worry that shes going to end up thinking hes ugly or gross. That she won't want him as a father, that she would be better off as someone elses kid. But BY GOD if ANYONE tries to take this little girl from his custody theyre going to have to pry her from his cold dead, collared hands.

I actually had a sad idea of Logan helping Wade get his daughter back because they claimed he was a danger to her and that the place they live is unsafe for her. It makes Wade insane. Like actually nuts. It's like he just.. breaks. There's no sympathy, no joking around, constantly crying in pain, no warnings, just plain, quick, silent murder. In this fic I actually had the idea of them getting married "Just to get ellie back" because Logan (as a room mate) can't stand the sight of him absolutely loosing his last purpose of living. So he adopts Ellie legally and shares custody of her, so now hes also her legal guardian and caretaker. "Supervises Wade with his daughter" kind of position and yet he doesn't. Theres no point. He knows Ellie is extremely safe and yes they need to move to a better home, Wade at least wants to live again now that he has Ellie..

The guy holds her so tight every night and plays with her all the spare time he has. Even when hes exhasuted and bloody from work, he still makes time for her. Sure, hes falling asleep at tea parties but at least hes present.

At the time Logan was a single dad of Laura and Gabby too so when they got court house hitched, they didn't tell the girls since yk "Its not like that"

But eventually it DOES become like that and they both have a happy little family of 3 crazy little girls, their crazy dad, and their even crazier papa. Oh and their puppy puppins.

I wont be writing this but if anyone does, tag me!

[swampgallows]

.

complaining here because i dont want to burden my friends but still want to collect validation in the form of little pixel hearts

my moms mental state has gotten so much worse and as a result her hoarding is becoming even worse and even more impossible to tolerate. i have tried to have more sympathy about it and to help her with it, sitting with her while she sorts "a box a day" or even just "one thing a day". ive gently recommended she get a new therapist but all she did was change her horse on the SSRI carousel and start smoking weed. i've linked her articles and books and videos, and when she doesnt look at any of them i try to relay to her in conversation what i learned from them when she bemoans "why am i like this?". none of it matters. she just complains that it's "too overwhelming" and she "can't help it" even though she refuses any help at all.

i know it is a mental disorder. i know it is overwhelming. i know it causes her physical pain to get rid of things and at the same time cripples her with guilt to keep it all. but as of right now all we're trying to get her to do is just rearrange the things so that they aren't turning our house into a fucking obstacle course, and she pushes back on that too. like she doesn't want to even organize the piles AS THEY ARE and condense them because she'd rather be "actually throwing things away and putting things away like a human being!"—the thing that she very specifically CANNOT do.

and if we consolidate it on our own? hooooly christ. she goes on a fucking rampage, slamming doors, screaming/sobbing, throwing shit (her shit. it's all her shit). because it's HER stuff and WE touched it and she feels guilty about all her stuff. she STILL talks about when my sister tidied the spice cabinet, convinced that "she threw everything away!" and that was years ago. (my sister is a different kind of insane and probably DID throw a bunch of shit away, but either way all it did was give my mom ammunition for the rest of her life to never do anything.)

this is long enough already so all i can say is that im disappointed in myself for losing more of my tolerance and sympathy. like at this point the only reason i care is because i have to fucking live here since i havent been able to stay employed or move out yet and my mental health is also incredibly bad. but also my mom's becoming much more intolerant and hateful as a human being, which makes me less inclined to keep trying. like she deliberately brings up incendiary topics (usually politics), whips herself up into a cyclone of hatred (every '-ism' you can think of) while preemptively apologizing for things that she thinks that we think about the politics that she "doesn't like talking about" despite blatantly shifting the conversation to bring them up, then devolves into histrionic crying or yelling at us for something she has imagined. this is almost every day. i know she's my mom so im trying but christ alive

[probablygayattorneys]

Do I keep listening to My House from Matilda the Musical and picturing Kat and the professor?

Yes.

Does it make me cry when I do that?

Yes.

Am I going to stop doing it?

Hell no.

[dungeons-and-dragon-age]

Hiii everyone, say, how do your Hawkes go go about sharing their estate? If they do it at all? Is everyone free to come and go or are they more private? Or do they only invite their LI to stay? I'm curious!! :)

[ganondoodle]

so with echoes of wisdom .. i havent watched any of the trailers beyond the very first one and the thumbnails/screenshots and what others have said about it-

but with the world inside the rift being called "Welt des Nichts" aka "world of nothing/void" in german ('still' in english, for some reason) and demises title in french being "avatar of nothing" ... yeah my anxiety is shooting through the roof again

(hopefully you can be a little more forgiving for me being anxious/weird about it bc demise is my blorbo)

i had similar worries with totk, that werent proven true thankfully, but the darn book is making it all worse again with all those weird lore things the game doesnt even so much as hint at AND potential retcons- im in for a really rough time huh, not just stress in real life (more in tags.. its alot) but now about my specific hyperfixation from two things even (AND artblock still..)

weird as it may sound, i dont want demise to get more lore, partly bc i dont believe theyd do anything with him that i would like (given their track record) but much more importantly- the fact that he has this little lore about him is precisely one of the reasons why i fell in love with him, i tend to like characters that are neglected by the narrative, and his story being both so flat and already done meant i can be very creative with what i come up with for him without necessarily contradicting anything in canon (which is ... or was a big point of how i wrote destiny's story and lore, working with canon in a way that reframes it all without straight up ignoring it ... but i suppose i urgently need to let go of that and accept i spend alot of time working things that will go to waste :( ) AND not having to worry that there will be more stuff with him that would massively change not only what im writing but also potentially how i feel about him since the game he was briefly in was the oldest chronologically and ended with his death- i didnt expect them to mess with anything that far back and thought theyd just go forward and leave the timeline behind and wouldnt mess with it again, given how botw seemed to be a sort of 'fresh start' that seemingly regarded the past as the past that needs to rest and that the timeline was finally no longer a discussion if everythings unified through botw and one thing going forward

but i suppose i was very wrong with that .__.

right now the only thing that motivates me still is the left over determination and spite to work on my zelda comic, since i have never gotten this far and really want to get something done for once, but i cant lie that im feeling like i should pause all work on it too to wait and see waht the book and the new game will do .. either to determine if i still have the will to keep working on it after those things are out (my love for tloz has been taking alot of hits lately ..) or if i have to change stuff (mostly bc of my lore problem trying to not ignore it ..)

[puppyeared]

Ouhhhh friendship I love friendship……..

[sskk-manifesto]

Ep 5!!!