#she's kind and headstrong and full of life despite everything

[sensazioneultra]

man i'm so 😞 it's the last day of one of my coworkers

[lizzypuppet1711]

things about toronto’s production of the great comet at crow’s theatre/musical stage co that i need everyone to know about because i am obsessed with this show.

as of writing i have seen this show five times.

very long under the cut:

full cast listed here. at time of writing, donna garner replaces louise pitre as marya, tyler pearse replaces lawrence libor as dolokhov, and ben carlson replaces marcus nance as andrey/bolkonsky. currently i’ve seen the og cast four times and the replacements once.

the stage is set up with seats on three out of four sides, with front rows at tables, back of house left and right sides at barstools, and a small balcony with some seats on house right. there are balconies on either side, with a revolving platform in the middle of the stage (revolving by being pushed by cast members or stagehands). seats around 200 people or so.

the actors are EVERYWHERE. it is so incredibly immersive

the music is very punchy

during prologue, everyone is taking shots as they’re introduced, except dolokhov, who drinks straight from the bottle and sprays it into the air

i’m a dolokhov girlie through and through and once he nodded hello at me during the prologue and i legit swooned

mary is walking around holding a program showing off the family tree, actors will point to them on tables etc

once anatole pointed at his face on it, pointed to himself, all in a very flirty manner

he winked at me during prologue once and i’m still thinking about it

evan buliung is acting his ass off as pierre

he is definitely is more gruff and acting focused (think dave malloy over josh groban)

at “hours at my screen”, pierre takes an audience member’s phone (from one of the tables… or once out of someone’s hands LMAO) and mimes tapping, scrolling through it etc

two stagehands move things on and offstage (such as the sofa, church props etc) and they are also in little costumes. it’s very adorable

dolokhov’s little soldier walk thing??? during moscow????? i’m sure there’s a reason for it bc both of them do it but i have no clue why it’s there???? love it tho

heeyun park as mary is also acting her damn heart out

private and intimate life has a faster tempo and is SUCH a banger as a result

an audience member gets briefly pulled up on the platform to be the cheap french thing, he typically kisses up their arm, hugs them, and sometimes sits on their lap a bit

pierre is playing the tambourine in the background during natasha and bolkonskys and it is honestly kind of funny

hailey gillis plays natasha very emotional and headstrong. her no one else has a sense of urgency, desperation, and deep longing

the platform is spinning and people are walking around and she is singing like an angel…

basically i want to be hailey gillis when i grow up

actors are rotating the platform during no one else and it ends with andrey standing behind her and pierre standing in front of her. no one talk to me i’m losing it

as the run has continued, dolokhov’s adlibs during his intro in the opera have increased drastically

lawrence libor as dolokhov had such an air and presence (rizz?) about himself i cannot DESCRIBE. the comphet he gave me… i miss him v much. he was also very much giving toronto mans. and he made SO MUCH eye contact. he loves to look at you. i miss him. i need him. who said that

tumblr theatre girlies you would go insane over lawrence libor. if this show had ANY b roll footage i know i would be seeing edits all over the place

i am president of the lawrence libor fan club and everyone should join me

tyler pearse as dolokhov has heavy frat boy energy. he is also gayer, and somehow, sluttier. gives short king energy despite only being an inch shorter than lawrence (apparently)??? don’t ask bc i don’t know either he just does. anyway thank u tyler pearse for making dolokhov bisexual for real

either way dolokhov is doing SO MUCH in this production. he is wild he is a whirling dervish he is arrogant he is a bastard he is everything to me

“YEAH BABEY LETS GOOOOOOO” -lawrence libor as dolokhov, upon his entrance

in one performance he would go YEAH BABEY three separate times in act 1. yeahh

flirting with a girl in the balcony, dabbing up a guy in the balcony, generally being hilarious

and tyler pearse leaning over the balcony, rose in his mouth, wolf howling… i can’t.

basically i can’t with this production’s dolokhov. i’m obsessed

anatole’s entrance… he’s a whore. all i can say

rita dottor (ensemble) does the high soprano bravooooooo and she always sounds so fantastic. live laugh love rita dottor

george krissa, who plays anatole, is probably the most attractive man in ontario. like if you googled hot guy he would be the first result.

“where did they find this anatole. was he made in a lab or something. he was perfect” — my friend after seeing it

tumblr theatre girlies you would also be obsessed with george krissa. like jeremy jordan andrew rannells level obsessed. please love these toronto actors with me

i’d let him ruin my life ANY DAY. it is a fact that lesbians love george krissa. i hope he knows

the way he plays it… my friend described it like “lucas steele is like an alien david bowie, and george krissa is a bridgerton man. just a very charismatic, but normal, guy”

while i would say that lucas steele’s anatole believes he is truly in love with natasha, i would not say the same for george krissa’s. some of the manipulation happening here during the opera is. quite clear

when he is entering the box natasha struggles to open her fan, fans herself frantically, under the arms etc. then when he enters immediately shifts to fanning in a cool and collected manner. hailey gillis master of comedy

“we are speaking of most ordinary things” is especially like. this is a male manipulator if i’ve ever seen one

natasha lost was added back in!! fantastic obviously

anatole checking his hair in the mirror before waking pierre up. fucker

“look dolokhov’s coming around… and we’re off to the CLEURB”

brendan wall (ensemble) walking around during the club scene with a glowstick necklace on is peak comedy to me

i’ve said it but tyler’s dolokhov is an absolute slut at this scene. and for what AND FOR WHAT!!!!

also fun tidbit but all the glasses (other than shots) and any clear bottles have real liquid in them. i am very concerned something will spill one day

when dolokhov gets right up in the audience’s face during “known only to his intimates” i LOVE it idk

during the duel, marya and rita steal off to house left directly beside the barstools and chatter about how bad of an idea this is, they’re so drunk, etc

special shout out to divine’s “he will kill you STOOPID HUSBAND” so good

dolokhov’s adlibs during the duel… i need him. sorry

dolokhov gets shot in the side rather than his shoulder, and unceremoniously rolls off the platform as it’s moving. looks painful

hélène screams when dolokhov is shot but not pierre. so much to think about here

a life changing dust and ashes from evan. i can’t describe anything more just that he’s incredible. i’ve learned so much about acting just by watching him a few times

natasha’s face at “am i guilty…” breaks my heart she is so tormented

we are canadians we are going to pronounce our french correctly! no more charmantay

hélène has started adding some very fun runs into charming as the run has gone on. divine brown marry me

anatole is shirtless during charming. btw.

again i know he’s gay and i’m gay but.

the entirety of this rendition of the ball has been stuck in my head since december

his “don’t lower your eyes i love you” that whole section is delicious i want to eat his voice

plus “BEWITCHING AND I LOVE YOUUU” UGHHH such an ear worm but only when it’s their voices

the choreo going on here is very nice btw

i love the way he says natalie at this part idk. it’s not overly enunciated and the vowel is just right <— vocal nerd

the kiss feels like it lasts forever

music gets very very loud at the end and you can feel it in your skin

also fun fact the house music before and after the show is orchestral but during intermission it’s electronic. bc. anatole. gah details

when marcus was still in the cast you could really hear his voice during letters and it sounded sooooo.

dolokhov’s stupid little thumbs up to indicate he will be ok. pleaseee. i laughed i did

generally lawrence would grab at the place he was shot at a lot; while pushing the revolve etc. loved that detail. (tyler does too but less so)

sonya and natasha just sounds so great. like they just always sound fantastic i love that song

sonya alone. yes i am weeping. yes camille eanga-selenge is everything i want to be and more. she’s phenomenal

dolokhov sitting in a big fuckin chair at the beginning of preparations just absolutely clearly regretting every decision he’s made to facilitate this. is great.

i know i keep talking abt lawrence libor but the image of him at this part is just. really great. to me. sorry

very campy and exaggerated scowling and grimacing from anatole

dolokhov is so sick of anatole’s shit

“here feel how it beats” is NOT entertained he pushes him back immediately

lawrence dolokhov’s “dawdling” business was him tuning his guitar i miss musician dolokhov sooooo much gah

balaga truly does not sing any of his lines. he is basically yelling the entire time. i don’t know how he does it. it’s chaotic and hilarious and so fun

sonya and mary hand out the egg shakers on house right and left respectfully

near the end of balaga, four audience members are brought up to dance with the cast! (i got to dance with mary once!)

dolokhov writhing on the floor during anatole’s long held note thank u

during the goodbye section, anatole comes around to said audience members and interacts with them; dancing with them, booping them on the nose etc, and at “kiss me one last time”, invites a lucky audience member to kiss his cheek. (this once, was me. yup. still processing it.)

once he accidentally knocked someone’s egg shaker from their hand, dolokhov picked it up, laughed, gave it a shake, and handed it back, and yes i’m still thinking about it

when they sit down, balaga and dolokhov will sit on the house right stairs, though once there was an empty seat nearby so dolokhov wedged his way in between two people, guitar and all. so fucking good

anatole will squeeze himself between two audience members on house left, put an arm around each, and look around at everyone sitting in that area, out into the audience, etc. if one is going to make eye contact with him, it is now

once he threw his head back to look at the people behind him, and someone, at the speed of light, took their phone out and snapped a picture of his upside down head. i scream laughed

lawrence’s BETRAYED BETRAYEDDDD was sooooo good. so so so good

hailey gillis is an absolute powerhouse during in my house

usually when “natasha’s whole body shook” she falls to the ground silently but last time i went she YELLED and i gasped so loud

at “i have refused him” louise would go NO in shock and i FREAK OUT ABOUT IT.

and i loved her “what then? would that be alright???”

“NATASHA CRIED OUT! GO AWAY! GO AWAY YOU ALL HATE AND DESPISE ME” sounds SO FUCKING GOOD!!! I LOVE YOU HAILEY GILLIS

when the call to pierre music starts i always get goosebumps

the fight choreo when pierre grabs anatole by the collar is very good

if we’re comparing to broadway, it feels less like anatole’s life is in danger here but like i’m not upset about it

at this point anatole does not seem sad or upset to me more just. pissed off that it didn’t go his way. like annoyed

as anatole leaves during pierre and anatole the staging has him stepping around/over natasha as she is choking from the arsenic and it is such a. show of his shallowness

his petersburg note is fantastic obviously. live laugh love george krissa

marcus nance (andrey) has such a deep and beautiful legit singing voice. it’s sooo gorgeous. any word that raises against marcus nance will fall.

I MISS HIMMMM ok sorry.

i am more sympathetic to ben carlson’s andrey, however. marcus was Incredibly stoic ben has a bit more emotion to him i think

i could swear sometimes hailey is actually crying during pierre and natasha

her “pytor kirillovich” sounds so tiny and fragile ugh my heart breaks

and his “…pierre” is so assuring AUGHH

it’s such a beautiful scene obviously. i love the two of them so damn much i hope only good things happen to them forever

“it was clear and cold” also. chills EVERY TIME

“having traced its parabola” and “like an arrow piercing the earth” hit me so hard i cannot explain

genuinely evan buliung gives the most effective inspiring fantastic mind blowing performance i maybe have ever seen on stage. he is such an incredible actor and he inspires me beyond belief

the end when the lights get really really bright and then fade out. god. so simple and so fucking beautiful

now this post is very long. thank u for reading it all if you did! (will update after seeing it more times if there’s things to say!!)

if you’re anywhere near toronto i BEG of you to go see it!! it’s closing march 24th :(( so if you get the chance i deeply implore you. beg borrow or steal a ticket just get there! best comet production ever in my biased opinion :)

[professor-volo]

“Okay, as promised, let me introduce you all to the team.

This is Pecha, my Togekiss. She was my first ever partner and she’s been with me through everything. She’s a sweet little thing and an affectionate cuddlebug--even now she’s still trying to sleep under my coat at night heheheh!”

“Aspear is sort of her adoptive brother of sorts.” He gestures to the larger Togekiss floating nearby. “I found him as a Togetic when I was studying the massive mass outbreaks that started happening. He’s a bit more headstrong and reckless than Pecha but he’s got a good heart. He also helps gang up on me with Pecha and smothers me in his feathers. Oh! I should mention he’s an Alpha as well, I forget most people here can’t recognize Alphas on sight.”

“Atlas is my Garchomp. In truth, I wasn’t actually expecting him to be my partner; when you’re a kid, a Gible running at you full speed is a reason to panic. Pecha stunned him to help me out and I panicked and threw as pokeball since my legs were jelly. I don’t think he meant any harm by it though. Actually, even though he tries to look tough, he secretly gets really lonely when I’m not around.”

“Then there’s-AH” Volo is suddenly tackled by a large Hisuian Arcanine. “Get off!! Not right now! Off, off!” The Arcanine obeyed and Volo took a second to dust himself off. “That is Roseli. She’s an Alpha Arcanine I met back at the Coastlands. She saw me getting chased by an Alpha Glameow and jumped in to save me. After that she kind of just. Picked me up and treated me like I was a cub. She joined my team very willingly, and it was kind of a big achievement for a while to have an alpha for a partner at such a young age.”

“Polaris is my Spiritomb. I found the details for how to summon a Spiritomb while looking through some ruins. He’s a bit of a loner admittedly, but he really understands me. I like to watch the stars with him sometimes. I’ve heart that Spiritomb are usually considered pranksters, but the only pranks Polaris really pulls are hiding food and occasionally disappearing to scare people.”

“Then there’s Gabriel. I met him as a Riolu. I used to bring my pokemon to the Riolu and Lucario herds to help them train and Gabriel was a Riolu I saw quite often. After a few spars we had with each other, he ended up becoming a life long companion. He’s a VERY good boy, isn’t that right?” A Lucario in the background barked.

“My Roserade’s name is Chamomile. We met in the Mirelands back when I had most of my team together. I thought I had enough pokemon but then this one little Budew wouldn’t leave me alone. He followed me across the Mirelands because he wanted to join me and thought we’d be a good fit. And we were! After all these years he’s still been a lovely companion who wants to help out.”

“I met Snip Tool while I was studying space-time distortions.” A nearby Hisuian Decidueye rumbled. “He nearly pecked my eye out hehehe. But! He’s a good guy. He likes to be respected for his abilities and he likes a good challenge.  A lot of times if we had to camp out somewhere dangerous, I’d find him out there keeping watch even before I had said anything to anyone.”

“Addy on the other hand,” Volo pointed to a Leafeon who was looking up at him smugly, “is a little shit. I love him to death but he is a cheeky motherfucker who will hear you telling him not to do something and then proceed to do it in front of you. He will learn all your secrets and look at you so judgementally for anything and everything!! But! Despite all that, I do love hi ma whole lot. He’s one tanky boy and he can take a lot of hits if he needs to. (As long as they’re physical hits anyway.)

“Gooey is my Gastrodon and he is my very special boy!!! Back when I was traveling around the Fieldlands with him as a Shellos, literally nothing could hit this guy! He stalled out an Alpha Blissey while I was healing everyone from earlier fights! AN ALPHA BLISSEY! She couldn’t get a hit on him! He’s the craftiest powerhouse and my gooey little baby!!”

A Luxray came into view and nuzzled his head into Volo’s head. “Admittedly... Button and I didn’t get along very well in the beginning. I caught him completely on accident while looking for a different pokemon, but I didn’t want to stop in my search so I said I was going to release him later when I found it. He was also really aggressive and headstrong as a Shinx which kept attracting fights or scaring off other pokemon. I really thought Button was just going to be a temporary member but... well, my search kept going on longer and longer before I gave up and by that point... Button had mellowed out as he evolved and I’d realized how much he’d helped with battles so I finally swallowed my pride and kept him. I’ve been doing my best to make up for misjudging him ever since.”

“As for my non-battling partners, I have two! I’ve already talked a little about Embers, my Rapidash, but here she is! Even though her eyes are bad, her hearing and her sense of smell are still pretty good! And she’s really gentle; I’ll feed her berries out of my hand most days.”

“Lastly we have the beloved, most fearsome creature to ever come out of the Fieldlands!” Volo held out his hand and presented a small Wurmple, who was wiggling her legs and calling fiercely. “Wuwu. I picked her up a long time ago, and even though she’s quite strong, she’s been pretty resistant to evolution. I think she likes staying as a Wurmple buuuuut. Well. Wurmple can’t learn many moves. So I mostly keep her out of the way some place safe.” He gives her a little boop on the head. “You’ll get your chance to shine some day.”

“Aaand that’s everyone! Aside from Embers and Wuwu, everyone else stays with me pretty much all the time and I’ve raised Most of them myself so. If you any questions about them or their species, these would probably be the ones I’d know the most about!”

-Volo

[ofnightwind]

( chloe bennet ; cisfemale ; she/her ; lotus by christina aguilera ) hey, look! isn’t that MADISON LIU? the 28/125 year old VAMPIRE is known to be HEADSTRONG and REPENTANT. they’ve been in town for FOUR MONTHS and always remind me of a life lost and so desperately missed, crossbow bolts hidden in the back of car trunk & the scent of cherry blossom fragrance. let’s hope they survive what’s to come.

INTRO BEGIN. (TW: heavy suicide ideation / suicide attempt, murder)

FULL NAME AT BIRTH:  madison emily liu. NICKNAMES:    mads, maddie. DATE OF BIRTH:   december 21st. PERSONALITY TRAITS:

+   opinionated, kind, loyal, dependable, resilient, compassionate -    melancholic, stubborn, sometimes self destructive, sometimes withdrawn

SPECIES:    vampire; previously was a witch in a family of now extinct famous hunters. RELATIONSHIP STATUS:  single.     SEXUAL ORIENTATION:   pansexual. SIGNIFICANT CHARACTERISTICS:   n/a. SCARS:  none. LAGUAGES SPOKEN:    english, spanish, chinese, japanese, russian, korean, basically a lot she loves to learn different languages and loves culture  OCCUPATION:    TBA. CHARACTER INSPOS / PARALLELS:    caroline forbes (tvd), rosalie hale (twilight), allison argent (tw), faith lehane (btvs)

BIOGRAPHY.    

madison was born to a forbidden relationship between a hunter father and a witch mother. from the moment of her birth, madison was incredibly loved by both her parents although the bright little girl couldn’t say she felt that same love from either of her grandparents or through her parents sides of their families with the exception of her hunting uncles; being seen as the abomination of the families, disliked immensely but madison, as little as she was to even understand the hatred towards her always responded to them with a kind temperament. 

from the age of six on up, madison was trained in both magics and began her hunting training with her father firmly believing she should know how to defend herself and from a young age, she was exceptionally gifted at most weapons but found her talent and gift in the hunting crossbow. from thirteen madison would become a pro at the hunting life and excel with the magic her mother would teach her and madison would fall in love with magic as she did with her skill of a bow, learning everything she could pertaining to magic and using it to help others rather

madison would continue to live her life with as much of a kind touch as possible, aspiring to one day become married to the love of her life and she was happy to wait for that love despite society telling her otherwise that she had to be married but madison dejected that notion, holding onto the firm belief that love would be worth waiting for for that right one to come along and she had a few prospects from a fellow hunter she would briefly see but it was not meant to be as their views were too different, he viewed every supernatural as an evil entity whereas madison did not. she preferred only to hunt whenever it was necessary as madison couldn’t stomach taking another’s life if she could help it though she had the perfect skill and capability to do it. maddie didn’t mind holding a friendship with those she was morally obligated to kill such as the original vampire jaesun kang, whom she grew to become intrigued by and came to respect him the most out of any of the original vampires, finding a comfortable friendship within him, intrigued by the life he had led for the past near nine hundred years.

at twenty six, madison would enter a knee deep friendship (relationship ?) with a vampire, one lost and was simply trying to find his way through immortal life and madison was there every step of the way to ensure he could live within her town safely, even going as far to allow him to feed from her as a last resort when he needed it. though through the years, their friendship could become shaky at times as madison would sometimes find herself cleaning up a mess of his when he went too far on a binge, making excuses when any suspicions would fall onto him but madison was no quitter, once you had her trust and friendship, she would be a loyal friend to the end.

everything began to fall apart for madison when she was twenty eight, the town fell under attack from vampires, her mother and little brother being of the casualties in the massacre, their bodies along with others displayed as a sporty display. the hunters of the town joined together aside from madison who did what she could to protect her friends who would inevitably be targeted though it wasn’t without consequence. her friendship with the vampires was discovered and madison was seen and treated as a traitor amongst hunters; she wasn’t a true hunter they said when they also discovered her origins of birth that she was also a witch. the group played judge, jury and executioner to madison, even more hurtful that her own family members would allow what would come next: they would overpower her to first murder her where it wouldn’t kill her instantly, it was to be slow and steady with a finale of throwing her into an empty grave to leave her to bleed to death or be buried alive, whichever would come first but what they hadn’t realized was madison had accumulated vampire’s blood within her system only the night before from allowing her friend to feed on her but it went too far and he nearly killed her only to fix his mistake by feeding her blood. madison would die and she would end up digging through her own grave as a creature she didn’t ask to become.

madison would return to life though only as a vampire and she would not adjust to it well. it was a life she never wanted to live and had initially refused to complete the transition, allowing herself to die as she was meant to until hunger overtook her and she killed one of the townspeople, an old friend she’d recognize from youth. with her sire having fled town once he’d realize what he’d unknowingly done to madison, she was essentially abandoned and left to deal with transitioning on her own and the overwhelming guilt of taking lives would drive madison to beg jaesun, the original she would turn to when she had no one else, to end her life, to stake her. with his refusal, she would then attempt to burn herself alive to sunlight until jaesun convinced her otherwise, convincing her that vamprism wasn’t the end but the journey didn’t end there. madison for a period had lost that kindness she once possessed, replaced by a nasty bitterness and grief for her life being forcefully taken, for being abandoned, for being hated from the moment she was born, for being hated for her kindness and it was her kind heart that only brought her death and suffering. jaesun would show her the right path of being a vampire, retouching that kind soul she let go and over time, she began to start to accept her death and would begin the process of healing from the trauma of being betrayed and murdered, allowing herself to finally look at vampirism differently; choosing to then live her immortal life doing for others as she had as a human rather than be bitter although she can’t help but sometimes grieve for that life lost and still wishes to have died blissfully as a human.

OTHER TIDBITS AND INFO / HEADCANONS.

madison is the last (un)living member of the liu hunting family. they were a famous hunting family through the years of 1775-1929. after her death, she was disowned as a member of the family and maddie watched her whole family one by one over the years fall to death by the supernatural until the last member in their family line died in 1929.

if given the choice, obviously madison would have chose to grown old as a witch. she would not have chosen vampirism in any light and if you ask her her opinion on if you should turn, she’d recommend anything else but is supportive if that’s the route they want to take.

madison does her best to be a reflective vampire to what jaesun has tried to teach her and surprisingly since she got past the initial hurdle of vampirism, she is a very controlled vampire. she can handle and manage her urges easier than most.

she still holds hunter skills and capabilities and can kill her own kind fairly easily although older vampires are a bit harder obviously but she hasn’t actually staked one of her own in years. the last time she staked one was around 1973.

POSSIBLE / WANTED / CONNECTIONS.

kang jaesun: jaesun was really madison’s saving grace, mostly from herself; he helped her through her transition when she wanted to end her vampiric life before it could begin. he helped her begin to accept her death and it was him alone who restored the kindness maddie once lost due to bitterness and grief of her own life being taken from her. he is her best friend and is fiercely loyal to him, being eternally within his debt and will do anything for him he asks of her.

* intro subjected to be edited and added with more info.

[harufallinwonderland]

Tbh I randomly got the urge so HERE ARE MY FAV CURE OF EACH COLOR PART 1 (inspired by science project 99 on YouTube)

All these choices are from the seasons I watched so far (I do not need to finish the season to count it as plus I know way to much about seasons I haven’t even watched yet so expect spoilers for the seasons anyway ) and I will NOT be including Black cures,golden cures or rainbow cures because black and gold only have 1 cure and I feel like rainbow cures belong to others colors anyway let’s start I’ll be listing reasons for my choices as well

Fav blue: Saaya/cure ange from Hugtto

Oh Ange my baby she is genuinely so gorgeous with such A light and gentle blue and her angel theme and the feathers with all her special attacks are amazing

Then there her development omg when it comes to how much I like certain characters developments it’s personal fav (aka when I can relate to the character arc cause of there struggles) or well written fav (when I simply like them based on how well written the arc itself is) and Ange is A well written arc but that hardly puts her down as she is in my top 5 fav cures.

One thing I loved was how she felt aimless at times with the fact that despite wanting to act with her mother it was never A end goal she really never knew what she wanted to do but was to scared to ever try full on with something else but she went from A shy girl to one with tons of determination and was headstrong on what she wanted and I also found it beautiful how she found what she truly wanted to do by having the confidence to expand her horizons for the sake of acting with her mother.

And how things went with her mother brung me to tears with how Saaya learnt so much about how her mom tried to be A great mom along with being A actor with her determination and how her mother clearly loved Saaya and loved the idea of acting with her and how it weighed on Saaya wanting to go through A different path in life.

AND SAAYA’S LAST CHARACTER EPISODE HEART BREAKING her mom wanting to be able to support her daughter with A smile genuinely feeling bad for wanting Saaya to stay A actress and how Saaya was able to give her comfort with letting her know that everything she done was amazing to Saaya and how despite her own feelings she was A amazing mother.

Honestly I love Saaya because of how she grew to be able to stand her ground and be ready to chase the path she wants while still being A gentle caring person (truly befitting of A angel doctor huh?)

And honorable mention goes to: Yuni/cure cosmo:

For my fav yellow is it: Kirara/ cure twinkle

First of all I love her designs and how the purples and yellows work amazing together (even though when I was watching the show with my grandma she was hating on it) and I love all the star related stuff she does I love twinkle humming.

Another case of well written fav but still amazing (in my top 5 too) I love her purely business drive to go to her goal of being A model making her straight up refuse becoming A precure at first seeming like she was kinda detached from others but showing how she really is kind to others and can be assertive when needed with others (the Haruka dress episode being the first example)

Another part is her habit to take initiative while it was A dumb idea I love the fact in one episode she decided to say “FUCK IT” and went to attack the final boss (of course it didn’t work but at least she tried) and she is someone who has no problem doing what is needed and tends to go to do what she thinks is needed without hesitation most times.

And her final episodes where she is at first depressed over losing A business opportunity but gets another chance later and in most cases they would force the character to choose one or the other but she said “nah imma continue to be A precure and we handling this shit before school ends” with such determination and that’s just what I love about her most.

She is kind,brave,and determined not willing to let go of her dream but refusing to let others get taken either even as someone without A big dream I look up to her pure strength of will amazing 10/10 love her

Honorable mention: Homare/cure etoile

Next up is the purple cure prob most known for there mid season cures and mines is: Milk/Kurumi/Milky rose

Oh this one is controversial huh? Well let’s start with probably the least controversial thing in the franchise HOLY CRAP HER DESIGN it’s regal and beautiful it gives off mysterious vibes while showing she ready to kick ass and all the rose motifs are *chef kiss*

Anyway let’s get into the character cause she kinda controversial thankfully she ain’t no Coco so it’s not like I have to explain why she isn’t A creep so let’s start

She has easily the most satisfying character arc in the whole series for me from Yes 5 to Otona (one of the few good things about it) it felt A constant stream of her growing from A immature low key bitchy girl to the prime minister of her land wanting to not only help Coco and Nutts but also the kingdom she loves

Her development in the original Yes 5 was good nothing to make me love her this much just A simple “don’t be A bitch” story with A bit of how she can become A better care taker THEN THERE IS GOGO I swear gogo is just the fairies season and honestly don’t mind Milk becomes Kurumi and is able to fight on the front lines and able to do shit herself and she shows it off amazingly from how she was introduced being mysterious with everyone but nutts not knowing she was Milk and how she wanted to be A mysterious girl not only for her ego but to make sure she can help coco and nutts without A chance of burdening them.

And how her bond with Nozomi grows so much that some people actually start liking her in Gogo and it’s cute to see and then how she takes everything she learnt in both yes 5s and apply it to her adult life and learning more from them and her shitty office job that leads to her eventually being able to become prime minister of her kingdom and how over the years she more then prove she is A strong figure with tons of conviction and strength that the faires went along with it.

She has A character arc that fucking make me scream by how it feels like it fits her and A proper elevation of her starting point in Yes 5 while showing how much she grew over the years and deffo benefited the most from having 2 seasons where she developed without A doubt my second fav cure.

And honorable mention goes to Ruru/cure amour

(Ingore the Emiru/Ma Cherie to the left)

Now for the other common mid season color red and on the table for this one is: Towa/Cure scarlet

Ok I know Moonlight is known as the most badass precure BUT PEOPLE INGORE TOWA WAY TO MUCH like her designs is so regal and screams she is above her in all ways.

AND HER FIRST FIGHT SHE FUCKING CURB STOMPED THE FINAL BOSS SO HARD SHE RAND BACK TO HER BASE LIKE HELLO!

Moonlight’s beat down of nearly all the villains was amazing 10/10 but like TOWA IS AMAZING TOO plus amazing arc with her trying to leave behind her time as twilight as A chance of saving her kingdom no less her brother.

Her friendships are amazing too learning something from all the other cures plus Yui is great to see and she grows such amazing bonds make me get hyped EVERYTIME she on screen honestly all around 10/10 top 10 cures for sure

Honorable mention: Emiru/cure Macherie

(Ingore Ruru to the right and yes before you ask I do love the hugtto cast that much)

Next up what is known to be the most fucked over color my fav green cure IS: Lala/cure Milky

Ironically she is my second least fav star twinkle girl but I still love her and honestly the greens don’t got much to them so Lala

Honestly while her arc didn’t resonate the most with me I still love her from her bond with Hikaru and everything related to the episodes about her planet she was charming and entertaining the whole way through.

And honestly her sometimes taking the role on the Mc from Hikaru helped her alot with her having a lot of moments where she shines amazingly being A perfect example of the shows themes of connections and how peoples differences doesn’t mean you can’t get along.

And her final moments of the show with Hikaru is easily some of the most emotional moments I’ve seen so far despite not getting A duo transformation you can tell that there friendship means legit everything to the show and how they helped each other grow is 10/10 love her.

For the honorable mention it is: Komachi/ cure mint

(OK IMMA NEED TO DO A FUCKING PART 2 CAUSE ITS ONLY 10 IMAGES MAX ON MOBILE imma prob work on it right away but next time it will be Orange,White and the leaders Pink cures)

[ramblingzombpossum]

Last night I got to play Burning Wheel, it's a fantasy Greek Setting with big Avatar the Last Airbender vibes.

My character was unexpectedly (we the players and GM agreed to it right before the decision in game), declared the Arch-Mage, and since then she has done everything she can to stay neutral, calm, and not start worsening the wars between the city-states.

A lot has happened, and last night's game she decided she was tired of just letting fate and other's dictate what she does, instead, she convinced her man (an Enkavman Soldier who had spent years trying to woo her in Kentriko, but she never reciprocated because she didn't want to get hurt again, but after all they've been through, she absolutely has fallen) to go ahead of the caravan they're with to get to Enkavma early so they can spend just a little time together where she is not 'thw Arch-Mage, beholden to the people and responsible for the world' but instead JUST Cassandra as she was back in her home village.

Sebastian was giving her a tour, and because no one knew who she was, she got a real good look of what the problems of the city are.

Including the lower part of the city flooded and many of the families forced out of their homes. Many of the families sleeping on the streets, because the inns are all full. Guards walking the streets and waking people to get up and moving so that they are not there when the Arch-Mage shows up (you know, it'd look bad to have that kind of a problem.) Which nearly came down to her getting arrested because she hadn't gotten much sleep, since her only coins are Trokosi, which they don't accept because war hate, so her and Sebastian wound up sleeping on the street as well. (Boy that's going to be a fun thing to deal with.)

Since she was on the streets she was able to talk to some of the others, get a good inside perspective from the people, and not just the Politics of the city (she made that mistake in Trokos, and has some regrets.)

We ended the session with Melanion, the other player, leading the caravan into Enkavma, as everyone panics, because where the fuck is Cass, what the fuck are they going to do?

He failed to impress the Archon, and tried to be like "She is secretive..."

As Cass walked out of the crowd without thought, because there was a fucking wizard present, and she's never met a wizard.

So our ending notes were him declaring she'd been among them, and she greeted the Archon, apologizing for coming in unannounced, though she never stopped staring at the wizard, because holy fuck, he may be able to help teach her more.

I cannot wait for the next session in 2 weeks! Cass and Melanion are one of my favorite games.

The dynamic is super fun.

Cass is a quiet failed acolyte, as she never got to finish her training. She was called back to Kentriko when her father died at sea, so she could take care of her younger brother Perseus (who was the original Arch-Mage candidate.)

Melanion is a head strong carpenter apprentice with dreams of grandeur. He has been training all his life to one day compete in the games, even though no one knew if the games would ever return, because the Arch-Mage was unknown/missing for 20 years. He is very much a Greek Hero, and loves the adoration and attention.

Perseus, despite being an NPC, has been a very key character. Not only is he Mel's best friend, but he is the reason Cass sold her house, quit her job, traveled to Trokos, and was declared Arch-Mage because he didn't want to stand alone in the deciding. Perseus is a headstrong asshole a lot of the time, who Cass has always had some jealousy and bitterness towards, because their dad preferred him, not only for being a male but also because Cass looks much like their mother, and it hurt him a great deal.

I could probably go on and on about the game so far, last session was one of the few Cass heavy sessions, and I really enjoyed that. Usually she kind of floats about, but I'm trying to make my beliefs much more solid to help give her more backbone in the game.

[astaroth1357]

How Often They Worry about MC…

For those who don’t know, I have a little dog named Charlie and she is a large portion of my world. There's no need to be alarmed, my dog is fine, but there are days where I hold her and all I can think about is how much I worry about her health down the line… I suppose we often do that for the people we love, particularly the ones who may not last as long as we will. Take that as inspiration if you'd like.

Lucifer 

Near constantly. 

If you tracked his blood pressure on a grid, you'd see it start to continuously rise about when he decided they were worth having in his life.

Lucifer is the eldest sibling to a whole crew of brothers so he's no stranger to worry. He worried about his brothers when they were young, he worried about them after the Fall, and he still worries about them now (even if he's less open about it).

But a part of him knows that his brothers can handle their own, at least to varying degrees. The MC, though? He's far less sure…

They've proven rather resilient, but also headstrong and reckless. Neither of which are good things to be in a place this dangerous...

If Lucifer isn't careful, he can catch himself staring at a wall or window just wondering where they are and if they're doing alright… If he called them every time he had a passing worry, their inbox would be full by the end each week.

He holds himself back because he doesn't have the time to constantly protect them, but that doesn't stop him from sending a text once or twice a day. They better respond or he'll start (secretly) panicking.

Mammon

He forgets their mortality from time to time, but every time he remembers it hits like a ton of bricks…

Mammon is a pretty "in-the-moment" person. He doesn't spend a lot of time dwelling on the future, but whenever he does the thought of losing MC always comes back to him again and again.

Like. It's gotta happen eventually, right? They're human, humans die, hell they don't even live that long to start with!

The MC can always tell when Mammon's getting worried because he'll get uncharacteristically quiet and pace around or hover by them…

Every little injury or strenuous task will suddenly seem like too much to him as well. 

If they need to carry some boxes, he'll carry them all.

If they have to jog to class, he's carrying them. 

If they so much as get a papercut, he'll have a heart attack.

It's not very hard to get Mammon out of these funks - he really does want them to reassure him that they're okay - but he's never going to get fully over it…

Not until he can steal whatever top secret immortality formula Solomon must have used anyway… He'll get it off that bastard eventually.

Leviathan

Thinks about it so often he has to actively try not to just to get any peace…

He dodges his fears for MC like a protagonist dodges lasting consequences. Every time he feels one creeping up, he's always got a distraction waiting…

"Hey where's MC at? I hope they didn't fall into the riv-OH HEY CHECK OUT THIS NEW GAME!!"

"What are they doing over there…? That looks hard, what if they bre-WAIT DIDN'T MY FAVORITE VOICE ACTOR JUST RELEASE A NEW PODCAST???"

"What if the MC dies tomorrow and they leave me all alo-DEVIL FIGHT 200! YOU CAN'T BEAT DEVIL FIGHT 200, LET’S BREAK MY HIGH SCORE!!"

Cut him some slack, his psyche cannot handle the idea of losing them on top of everything else he grapples with every day.

If, on the rare occasion, he does let himself fall down that rabbit hole he becomes extra clingy and practically begs MC not to leave his room… like ever. He'd bubble wrap them if he could.

Anytime they get really hurt or really sick he refuses to leave their side even if it means he has to awkwardly sit on the floor. He just needs to be able to glance at them every so often to be sure they're alive… Still breathing?? Phew…

Satan

He worries, preps, rationalizes, then worries again…

For Satan, knowledge is power and every scrap of information he can learn about MC is more power he can use to keep them safe and healthy.

Yes, he will want their medical history. Yes, he's going to need a list of prescriptions. Family members too. And no, you do not get a choice.

He'll read up on as many things as he can - pawn medical journals off of witches and get magical alternatives from Solomon.

The cycle usually goes: 

1. He's lying awake at night because he just heard about some terrible bacteria that makes human's skin peel off or something.

2. He does all the research he can on this bacteria, its treatment options, best prevention methods, etc.

3. Gets right about to break out the rubber booties for MC to wear around, then realizes they have a very slim chance of catching said bacteria since it's only native to incredibly remote parts of Indonesia.

4. Feels instant relief that MC will probably not catch flesh-eating bacteria and can finally sleep again…

5. Hears of some other human medical horror from Solomon and starts to worry…

It's a vicious cycle indeed… But at least he's getting a lot of medical training. Soon enough he'll be the Devildom's version of a human vet (which I guess is just a doctor, come to think of it. 🤔)

Asmodeus 

Lives so "here-and-now" that he doesn't remember often, but when he does it's always heartbreaking…

Asmo usually tries to worry about things as little as possible. It’s bad for the skin, you know? But when the MC is involved, all of that goes out the window.

Like how a delicate blossom eventually wilts in the snow, the MC is bound to leave them in time… Usually there's supposed to be something beautiful in that kind of tragedy, but perhaps he's just too close to them to find any romance in it.

The thought of their death gives him breakouts and anytime they get hurt or sick he's the first brother to offer them comfort. Every time.

Because he doesn't feel like he's as physically strong as he brothers, he tries to make up for it by minding their health in other ways. Anything to keep his MC strong and beautiful as always!

If Asmo is in a worrying mood, then he may also compensate by trying to take the MC out to a party or some fun event. Why sit around worrying by himself when he could be making memories with them now, right?

Beelzebub

It comes in waves, mostly at night.

When your thoughts throughout the day are mostly, "I wish I wasn't so hungry," it doesn't afford you a lot of time to think about much else.

In a way, it's a good thing since he experiences a lot less stress. But those worries are still there and they mostly plague his dreams…

Beel doesn’t feel hungry when he's sleeping, so a lot of his fears will make themselves known overnight. An injured or dying MC is often in his rotation of nightmares though, of course, he'd rather it not be…

After having one of these dreams, his first instinct is to always make sure the MC is okay. If they're with him, he'll hug them and check their heartbeat. If they're somewhere else, he'll go to them or shoot a text.

He has woken up without realizing his nightmare was all a dream though, and usually it's up to Belphie or MC themselves to console him while he cries… It's so heartbreaking, sweet boy just puts a lot of pressure on himself to be sure they're safe…

When he worries, it's like they're the most beautiful and expensive China set in a room full of bulls and hammers. If he could tape them to his side, he probably would. He gets scared for them that much…

Belphegor 

More scared about it than anyone else in the House.

Despite his calm demeanor, Belphie is truly afraid of losing his loved ones beneath the surface… He's already lost one of his most dear siblings before, going through that again may just break him.

Unfortunately, he's also felt just how fragile the MC is firsthand... He's not even the strongest of his brothers, yet he was able to snuff them out so easily… Who's to say someone else won't try?

Like Beel, MC's death is a recurring nightmare for him but he can usually shake off his dreams fairly well, if not change them mid-sleep. More scary is when something is actually wrong with them or they're not feeling well.

Belphie always sets his inner laziness aside for the MC when he can. If they get sick, he'll usually be right along with his family to take care of them - even if he has to skip school to do so (not that he cares about class anyway).

When he's worrying about them, he tries to play it off at first, but soon enough they'll notice him acting overly concerned and losing sleep… Best to calm him down before he starts getting cranky.

[slasherhaven]

Hellou!^^ Sorry to bother you,but I was wondering how would the slashers(of your choice,if you dont want to do a lot/all of them) react to all cutesy s/o who is actually pretty mature and strong?

This is kinda self insert,but I hope you dont mind it much!Have a great rest of your day :)

The Slashers with a cutesy but mature S/O:

Thomas Hewitt 

Thomas loves your cutesy demeanour, he thinks you’re just the most precious thing he’s ever seen.

You just give him the sweetest smiles and he always melts.

And Luda May is particularly fond of you, thinking you’re adorable, just perfect for Thomas.

Even though he knows you’re perfectly capable, that your demeanour and appearance can be a little misleading, he is still super protective over you.

He likes that you’re more mature and strong willed because it means that you’ll be able to handle what being a Hewitt means, and you won’t let Hoyt push you around too much. Still, Thomas is there to protect you, it’s just in his nature.

Michael Myers

It’s Michael so...you’re not going to know what thoughts he has about you other than liking you enough to keep you alive.

But he’s had some thoughts.

Admittedly underestimated you because of how...cute you seemed. Is, less admittedly, fond of it.

He was pleasantly surprised when he saw the more mature side of you. You’d need that if you he planned on keeping you around.

Both to deal with him and what living with him will entail.

Jason Voorhees 

Jason is a big fan of the cutesy look. You’re such a light in his life and he loves you so so much.

Just give him one of those bright, adorable, smiles and he just melts for you.

But your maturity when it comes to handling serious topic is something he loves. Whether you’re talking about the things he’s done, comforting him about his past or his insecurities.

In his eyes, you’re a perfect balance of everything.

Brahms Heelshire 

As soon as you entered the house, Brahms knew that he would like you. You were just...adorable.

It wasn’t until Brahms actually made himself known to you that he started to see a different side of you.

That’s when he realised that you’re not as easy to push around as he thought you would be. And that’s a good thing.

If you let him, Brahms will walk all over you. But you don’t allow that.

Brahms may think you’re the cutest thing he’s ever seen, you’re strong enough to handle him, mature enough to be that person he can lean on when he needs it.

Bo Sinclair

Completely underestimates you for your cutesy look. He assumes you’re going to be easy to push around but that turns out to be completely wrong.

He’s almost impressed when you prove him wrong, proving to be much more mature and much stronger than he expected.

You’re interesting, he’ll give you that.

He does kind of like the cutesy look and even the behaviour. He doesn’t know why, he just does. But he is glad that there is a more mature side of you, simply because his life calls for it and he feels less of a need to keep you away from everything.

Vincent Sinclair 

Doesn’t underestimate you the same way Bo does, he knows better than to judge somebody from appearance alone.

He does think you’re adorable though. Just watching you makes him feel all warm and fuzzy on the inside. You are everything to him even if he thinks you’re too good for him.

You’ll need that maturity of yours to deal with Bo. And Vincent does like that you’re able to take care of him when he needs it.

Lester Sinclair

You’re such a good, bright thing in such a dark place. He loves you. He loves coming home to you.

Despite loving so cutesy you are, Lester is appreciative of your maturity and how strong willed you are. You need it to be apart of the family, to live in Ambrose, even if he tries to keep you as far from it all as possible.

He also likes that you can sometimes be the one that holds him, even if he loves nothing more than holding you.

Bubba Sawyer 

Bubba adores your cutesy appearance, he thinks you’re adorable and just so precious.

And the more playful and ‘cute’ side of your personality meshes well with his and even his brothers.

However, your more mature side means that you can handle them all better, talk them out of their really bad ideas, and get them to calm down when you need them too. 

Drayton will undermine you because you’re ‘cutesy’ but you can handle those boys better than him any day. He won’t ever admit it but he appreciates it.

Billy Lenz 

Similar to Brahms, Billy loves how cutesy you are but it’s good that you’re actually really mature because you’ll need to be to handle him.

During the times you allow yourself to be more playful, your personality works very well with Billy’s. The two of you able to just carelessly joke around.

But he cherishes your more mature side because he needs it. You’re able to hold him and reassure him when he’s having a rough day, the only thing that can console him during a complete breakdown.

Otis Driftwood

Otis loves your cutesy outer appearance but he also loves that it’s a little misleading.

He likes that you’re not what you seem to be on the surface. That people would be fooled by you. Hell, even he was fooled at first.

He doesn’t really like the idea of sending you out to bring in unsuspecting victims but he has to admit that you’re perfect for the job. People are suspicious of you, they fall for your cutesy self, but Otis knows you’re strong enough to not let them push you around.

Admittedly, he loves how confused people get when they find out you’re together. You’re just so cute and sweet, how could you be with somebody like him? He likes to rub it in their faces, knowing that you’ve already got them all in the palm of your hand.

It’s a good thing that you’re more mature and strong willed than somebody might assume, than he thought you would be at first, because you’d need it to be a part of this family.

Baby Firefly

In many ways you and Baby have a lot in common.

She is playful, friendly...arguably cutesy. She presents herself as flirtatious but innocent. She lures victims in by putting on her lost little girl act. She downs plays her intelligence and, of course, her bloodlust.

So, in many ways, the two of you are similar. People underestimate you.

This also means that you have a certain understanding and respect for each other, while getting along like a house on fire.

The two of you are always the ones sent out to lure in victims, because you’re the best at it.

And once you have the victims back at the house, they slowly start to realise their mistake in trusts in the two of you.

Yautja (Predator)

Knows better than to judge you based on appearance or even on first impressions.

He won’t develop a full opinion on you until he knows more about you.

He does think you’re absolutely adorable, just the most precious little human he’s ever met...

But you also prove to him that you don’t need as much protection as he might have first thought. You can look after yourself.

Sure, there are things he would have to protect you from, but not in your every day life. You are perfectly headstrong and capable. He knows that and he respects that.

[miraculousdeservesbetter2024]

🐝Zoe Lee/Vesperia In Bee-Exceptional🐝

Mr. Lee isn’t Zoe’s biological father now, he’s her step father and Andrey’s ex-husband. So her full name is Zoe Lee-Bourgeois. Zoe wanted to go by that name too because she actually cares about her step dad.

Zoe is more honest and straightfoward in this AU. However, despite this, she doesn’t tell Chloe everything that happens in her life because she knows what Chloe goes through in her life. She doesn’t want to use her sister as a emotional dumpster.

Zoe also tends to show a new cool and laidback traits every now and then.

Zoe equally shows a stronger passion for acting and different kinds of art than in canon (because people have the right to have similar interest with someone).

It’s been confirmed that Zoe is very athletic, but being an athlete is not her dream.

These new traits explains more why she’s so up to par with the new role of the superhero despite it being her first time.

Also, she’s a bit different as Vesperia. Vesperia is more confident in herself and her abilities, which is why she’s a bit more headstrong in battle.

Despite her new traits though, Zoe remains sweet and a bit insecure. 

Zoe has a confirmed crush on both Marinette and Luka, making her Bi/Pan.

Mr. Cuddles was a custom made stuffed bear that was given to both Zoe and Chloe to share. Before Andrey and Zoe left for New York, Zoe gave Chloe Mr. Cuddles to “have another friend while she’s gone”.

Also to let you guys know, Andrey and Andre have gotten a divorce before the series began. Zoe went with her mom to New York and Chloe stayed with Andre in Paris. Andrey then married Mr. Lee, but they broken up 2 years before the series began. It was Zoe’s wish and idea to want to move back home with her sister.

Zoe has a good relationship with her father, but as much as she did want to stay with him, she wanted to move to Paris to have a fresh start, which she did, even though her and her sister aren’t on the best terms right now.

Zoe has a extreme fear of roaches, since she was often bullied with them.

Zoe was also bullied for other reasons other than trying to fit in or because she didn’t act like a bully.

One of the reasons why Zoe was bullied is in a little more of a “grey” area rather than “black and white”. Zoe’s honesty and straightforwardness might’ve gotten her more into a bad situations amongst the students. Sometimes, kids are sensitive, but cruel. Kids often misjudge, and Zoe being the way she is lead them to think that Zoe thought she was “better” than them. I’m not saying their bullying was justified, but understandable.

Other reasons for her bullies bullying her was because Zoe was seen as “the prefect girl & student” amongst her peers. She was very talented, was good with art, was part of the theater/drama club at school, good grades etc., so they were not only jealous, but again assumed that Zoe thought that she was better than everyone else.

((More will be added in the future.))

[concerningwolves]

When Dealing With Wolves \ Project Info

What if Little Red Riding-Hood's mother had reached out to the wolves in the woods? What hidden truths would she have found out there in those cool, green depths, where the earth itself sings and the trees know your name?

WDWW is my debut novel, coming in late 2021. It's a very loose retelling of Little Red Riding-Hood in a high fantasy world and features an autistic lead character, polyamorous families, a magic system inspired by yarn & fibre crafts, and strong fairytale/mythological vibes. Oh, and talking wolves. If you're curious, the first two chapters are available to read free [here].

OVERVIEW

GENRE: Epic/High fantasy

SUBGENRES: Mythopoeia; thriller

TARGET AUDIENCE: Adult

STATUS: Final revisions; self-publication prep

SERIES?: Yes – Book one. [Book two is The Kindness of Ravens; info on that WIP is here]

KEY THEMES & TROPES: Redemption & personal growth \ trauma & recovery \ magic & witchcraft \ found family \ the importance of compassion and empathy \ emotion-based magic \ fairytales \ mythological worldbuilding \ mystery & intrigue \ character-driven plot

SYNOPSIS

Ys is a wild and restless place, ruled by the ancient magics that lurk there. At its southernmost tip is the town of Erdansten, surrounded by fear and crumbling walls; to the north is Deothwicc, the forest of the Wolvenkind, dark and ancient. Between them lies a land marked by the ghosts of a history nobody can remember, rich with secrets that could tear apart everything the Kinds think they know.

[full synopsis, character overview and other info below the cut]

Rostfar is supposed to protect the people of Erdansten from the wolves and magic, a duty she takes seriously – despite being the very thing that her people fear. For years she has kept a tenuous balance between her duty and her own magic, clinging on to her secret with everything she has. She knows that the line she walks is a perilous one, but she can’t escape this lie she has built now. Not if doing so would tear apart her world and put her family in danger.

When her lover’s estranged brother arrives in Erdansten, however, the delicate balance she has maintained all her life is thrown into turmoil. Things from beyond the walls start to close in, attacking her people, and increasingly it seems that her only hope lies far to the north. In Deothwicc. But Rostfar’s absence from Erdansten sends the careful structure of power crumbling down, and those she has left behind must fight to maintain order as the worlds of wolves and humans collide.

CHARACTERS

► MAIN CHARACTERS

Rostfar → human || 36 || Arketh's mother, lover to Isha and Mati || autistic with a special interest in folklore, mythology and history || white; red hair, freckles, blue eyes; short and stocky build; small scar on her upper lip || As the Dannaskeld of Erdansten, it is Rostfar's job to oversee the security and defence of the town. It is difficult to protect people from magic, however, when you are the very thing they fear.

Arketh → Human || 4 || darker, copper-toned skin, auburn hair, brown eyes; small for her age; likes colourful clothes || autistic || daughter of Mati, Isha and Rostfar || Bright, curious, optimistic and wise beyond her four years, Arketh is well-loved in Erdansten. While her mother fears the magic that hounds them both, Arketh loves it – even as night-terrors and sleepwalking episodes threaten to expose her to the world.

Grae → wolf || grey-brown coat and brown eyes || has PTSD and depression || yearling || One of the youngest of the Deothwicc pack, Grae has grown up under the shadow of his litter-brother's death. While all the wolves around him seem content to live and move on, he has struggled in silence with an anger that now threatens to consume both himself and everyone he loves.

Aethren → human(?) || 18 || nonbinary || trainee hunter under Rostfar || white; black hair, grey eyes; gangly build || For all their skill at hunting and tracking, Aethren has never felt good enough. Never felt right. They're always too prickly, too surly, too quick to take offence. Nothing makes sense right now, but they're certain this new power uncoiling in the back of their head is only going to make matters much, much worse

Yrsa → wolf || reddish coat, amber-brown eyes; small and slight compared to most of her kind || Although Yrsa agrees that wolvenkind must stick close together to survive, she cannot help but feel curious about the odd, two-legged beings beyond the marshes and mountains. Her packmates call her naive, but Yrsa is sure there is something they could learn from the humans – and she is only too eager to prove her theories right.

► SECONDARY CHARACTERS

WDWW has a large supporting cast, but some of the foremost secondary characters are —

Isha → human || 33 || One of Arketh's fathers, in a triad with Rostfar and Mati || Copper-brown skin, darker than Arketh's, and close-shorn hair, brown eyes; very short and lean; calloused hands || blacksmith || trying to grow beyond the ghosts of his past

Mati → human || 37 || Arketh's other father, in a triad with Rostfar and Isha || Long brown hair and beard, green eyes; extremely tall and bulky build || always slightly scared of his own strength, so he never does anything fast || solid as rock with a warm, compassionate heart

Marken → human || 40 || Rostfar's best friend, Aethren's father || foremost healer in the Isles of Ys; nobody is quite sure where he learned such revolutionary medicine || grave and closed-off, he is often accused of aloofness, although anyone treated by him can see the deep compassion behind his eyes.

Natta → human || 36 || Rostfar's twin sister and Dannhren (head of the council) of Erdansten || cool-headed, driven and ambitious, with a bad habit of forgetting to share her emotions with the people she cares about

Kristan → human || 15 || Natta's son || Apprentice healer || Born with one arm || Both gullible and headstrong, Kristan's fear of the dark and the mysteries beyond the walls of Erdansten may prove to be his undoing. And the undoing of the town.

Myr → wolf || father of the Deothwicc pack || world-weary but determined to find a better future for his pack

Estene → wolf || mother of the Deothwicc pack || scarred deeply by the deaths of her last litter, Estene now believes that the only hope for her pack is to trust a human. Unfortunately, she is yet to meet a human who could be worthy of such trust.

Thrigg → no longer human || 200-ish? (She can't remember) || Thrigg longs to rejoin the world outside of the magic-bound city of Hrafnholm, but her longing is kept in check by her fear of what she will find.

► ANTAGONISTS

Faela → human || 42 || Isha's estranged half-brother || arrives in Erdansten in the dead of night, with old wounds on his body and deeper wounds in his psyche. Guilt surrounds him like a shroud.

Ethy → human || mid-late 60s || retired hunter who now tends to the half-tame ravens in Erdansten. She wields her love for the town like a weapon.

Unwolf and Other → no longer wolves || ?? || strangers from another land, wreathed always in a malicious, living fog that covers their tracks.

OTHER INFORMATION

► MISC. INFO

As of writing this post (17.03.2021), I have one (1) chapter of copy-edits left to revise.

I hope to have a solid release date for the novel by the end of April.

It will be self-published, with both ebook and print versions available.

► TAG LISTS & TRACKING

Taglist members will be tagged in important milestones/updates, and in longer excerpts from the book. If you'd like to be added, please reply to this post or tell me that you'd like to be added on the reblog (or send an ask if the askbox is open). You can ask me to take you off at any time :)

To keep track of the project progress or learn more about it, check out the #When Dealing With Wolves tag

► SUPPORT ME

I have a Patreon for my writing, with £1 and £5 tiers. You can also support me on Ko-Fi, where I cross-post monthly Patreon stuff, either through one-off tips or monthly support.

[astrognossienne]

tragic star: keith moon

“If you don't like it, you can fuck off!” - last words of Keith Moon

This one was a long time coming, but frankly, it took me a while to get interested enough in the subject to actually do this analysis, let alone finish it. At any rate, Keith Moon, like most of the drummers from the rock ‘n’ roll period that we still read about today, led a self-destructive lifestyle. A close friend of his once said the drummer was “like a train ride you couldn’t stop.” Not only was his drumming chaotic – so was his life. According to some, he was at his core a kind and generous soul, but to others, he was lost, lonely soul, and terribly immature throughout his adult life. Perhaps it was the sudden success, upon joining the rock band The Who, when he was only 18 (although plenty of others of the same era were as young, or younger, and survived just fine), but Keith was so eager to please and make everyone laugh that he eventually became the “Moon the Loon” character that he was portrayed as in the media. It got to the point where he wasn't sure who he really was. A true Leo, he made a circus out of everything and he wouldn't walk into any room and just listen. He was an attention seeker and he had to have it. He used amphetamines, tranquilizers, drank way too much alcohol, destroyed hotel rooms and friends’ homes, threw TVs into swimming pools, set fires, and the list goes on. He was ultimately unable to outrun or outlast his demons; whether it was the wife and child he drove away, the friend and chauffeur he accidentally killed in early 1970...whatever else haunted him, it ultimately caught up with him just as he was finally trying to improve his life. Friends were well-acquainted with the many sides to Moon’s strange personality; one minute he was insulting, exaggerating, joking – the next minute he’s a wide-eyed, innocent-looking drummer boy. The public Keith Moon was The Who’s manic drummer and hellraising, daredevil comedian; a man who only ever lived in the moment. However, the real Keith Moon was a son, a brother, a father and a deeply insecure man. A man of extremes, his was a complete shitshow of a life.

Keith Moon, according to astrotheme, was a Leo sun and Cancer moon (the moon is speculative). Moon was born to working class parents in Wembley, London, England. He was a hyperactive child by nature and a mediocre student at school. His art teacher said in a report: "Retarded artistically. Idiotic in other respects". His music teacher wrote that Moon "has great ability, but must guard against a tendency to show off." At the age of 12, he had joined the Sea Cadet Corp and was given his first musical instrument, the bugle. He left school by 15 and was in his first band, The Beachcombers. While performing with the Beachcombers, he used to attend concerts of a band called The Detours. At that time The Detours were planning to sign a deal with Fontana Records and for this deal, this band required a new drummer. The Detours changed their name to The Who in 1964. When Moon learned about the band’s need for a new drummer, he approached them for an audition. After the audition, he became their new drummer, and performed with The Who for the first time in 1962.

From the moment he joined, musically the band was complete, although adding his already volatile personality to those of the other three equally headstrong members meant that the early years of the Who's career were fraught with drama and violence, despite their almost immediate success.  Much of the tension came from the fact that Keith readily joined in on popping pills with guitarist Pete Townshend and bassist John Entwistle, while lead singer Roger Daltrey (with whom Keith was never particularly close) didn't. After sacking Roger for two weeks in mid-1965, he was reinstated, band relations improved, and the Who continued to release a string of successful singles and albums before a downturn in their fortunes in 1968. However, the release of the album Tommy in 1969 turned them into international megastars overnight and from that moment until the day Keith died, they would remain one of the top rock bands in the world. Running concurrently with the Who's rise to stardom in the 1960s was Keith's relationship with his wife Kim. She first met Keith in 1965 when he was 19 and she 15, and while they fell in love rather quickly, he exhibited twin streaks of jealousy and insecurity and Moon was occasionally violent towards Kim. While his mental issues, which would now be readily (and correctly) diagnosed as a combination of ADHD and BPD, reared their ugly heads on innumerable occasions, Keith's true personality shone through enough that Kim stayed with him; she decided to marry him when she became pregnant within a year of dating, and they got married in 1966. Their daughter Amanda was born on 12 July. In those days, there was a belief that married rockstars with kids weren’t as appealing to their mostly female fans, and the marriage (and child) were kept secret from the press until May 1968. He loved his daughter, but his absences due to touring and fondness for practical jokes made their relationship uneasy when she was very young. "He had no idea how to be a father", Kim said. "He was too much of a child himself."

The chaotic sixties would not hold a candle to what the new decade had in store for him, however. Shortly after New Year’s in 1970, Moon accidentally killed his friend, driver and bodyguard, Neil Boland, outside the Red Lion pub in Hatfield, Hertfordshire. Pub patrons had begun to attack his Bentley; Moon, drunk, began driving to escape them. During the fracas, he hit Boland. After an investigation, the coroner ruled Boland's death an accident; Moon, having been charged with a number of offences, received an absolute discharge. Those close to Moon said that he was haunted by Boland's death for the rest of his life. Moon had nightmares about the incident and said he had no right to be alive. Also, compounding this tragedy, was the fragile state of Moon’s marriage. Even after marriage and his daughter being born, he was still jealous, self-centered, and abusive to his wife Kim, both verbally and physically. His mental state also deteriorated as his appetite for all manner of pills escalated and he exploded into a full-blown alcoholic. Even after separating for a year, Kim returned to him, hoping that he had finally changed, but the insane lifestyle Keith kept up at their house became too much. Kim and Amanda (nicknamed “Mandy”) finally left for good in 1973. Since his marriage was a central part of Keith's life, their divorce would come to affect him perhaps more than any other event in his adult life and it was a devastation Keith would never recover from. While most people would use an event like this as the impetus to clean up their act, Keith used it instead as an excuse to drive himself further into oblivion.

Moon's lifestyle began to undermine not only his health but his career. During the 1973 Quadrophenia tour, at the Who's debut US date, Moon ingested a mixture of tranquilizers and brandy. During the concert, Moon passed out on his drum kit during the song "Won't Get Fooled Again." The band stopped playing, and a group of roadies carried Moon offstage. After he was given a shower and an injection of cortisone, he was sent back onstage. Moon passed out again during "Magic Bus," and was again removed from the stage. The band continued without him for several songs before Pete Townshend asked, "Can anyone play the drums? – I mean somebody good?" A fan in the audience, who happened to be a drummer, came up and played the rest of the show. During the opening date of the band's March 1976 US tour at the Boston Garden, Moon passed out again over his drum kit after two numbers and the show was rescheduled. By the mid-1970s Keith was living in Los Angeles and getting up to even more insanity with John Lennon, Ringo Starr, Harry Nilsson, and other stars. Even a new love in his life, Swedish model Annette Walter-Lax, couldn't get him to slow down and take control. There were even stints in psychiatric wards after some mental breakdowns brought on by his despair at losing Kim and his daughter and his drinking. His alcohol and drug abuse was now not only affecting his health (he put on a significant amount of weight at this time due to infrequent gigging) but sadly, his drumming. In 1978 soon after he recorded Who Are You, his final album with The Who, depressed by the deterioration of his drumming and threats from the rest of the Who to clean up his act or else, that he finally decided to get some help.  By the summer of 1978, he seemed to be trying to get his life in order, staying sober and solidifying his relationship with Annette. He was terrified to go into rehab or under psychiatric evaluation, however, and instead self-medicated with Heminevrin, a drug used for treating acute withdrawal from alcohol. However, he took too many on his final night and sadly died on September 7, 1978 at the age of 32.

Over forty years after his death, it's still difficult to think of Keith Moon as anything more than just a hard-drinking insane rock star who would smash his drum set on stage or destroy a hotel room. But regardless of the human being behind the drumkit, the legendary drummer should be remembered as the man who forever changed the sound of rock 'n' roll.

Next, I’ll go back to my beloved star analyses by covering a personal favourite of mine; a force of nature and an unsung pioneer of cinema whose death was ridiculously sensationalized and whose colourful life was almost as wild as Moon’s: Cancer Lupe Vélez

Stats

birthdate: August 23, 1946*

*note*: due to the absence of a birth time, this analysis will be even more speculative.

major planets:

Sun: Leo

Moon: Cancer

Rising: unknown

Mercury: Leo

Venus: Libra

Mars: Libra

Midheaven: unknown

Jupiter: Libra

Saturn: Leo

Uranus: Gemini

Neptune: Libra

Pluto: Leo

Overall personality snapshot: He may sometimes have wanted a safe, simple life where he felt emotionally contained and able to pursue his own creative interests. Then, however, the compulsion to strive for a more central, leading role reared its challenging head, and he knew he had it in him – so out into the spotlight he went. So immense was his creative energy as well as his warm feeling for others that he could become both the artistic home-maker and the home-loving artist/writer/entrepreneur. His personality was large and welcoming, colourful and theatrical because he had such an uncanny knack of dramatizing his vivid impressions and selling himself in the most genuine, heartfelt way. Both the paternal and the maternal urge was strong in him. He needed to use his will to project and establish your identity in the world, and to use his instincts to nurture and protect his emotional and material security. The Sun and the Moon are in their ‘home’ signs here, so that potentially he had the creative vision of Apollo and the lunar wisdom of Diana all rolled into one. This could make him pretty overpowering at times, and indeed he needed a partner and a family on whom he could lavish his emotions. His bearing was often aristocratic, sometimes haughty, oversensitive and self-absorbed, but he always seemed to have enough affection to go around so that no one felt left out. He also managed to remain approachable and compassionate because he was so aware of his own vulnerability and need to be loved. Thus he made a warm and understanding friend, and he enjoyed expressing his feelings with original flair and thoughtfulness.

He was protective, possessive and clannish, a stalwart member of his family, group and nation, and utterly devoted to his ideals. Deeply honourable and dependable, he brought an attitude of devotion and romantic style to all he did. He may have actually had a good head for business because he possessed an instinctive knowledge of security needs as well as a shrewd understanding of people, their desires, fears and foibles. His refined taste for comfort and beauty was part of the impetus for success – he knew his own mind and did not easily budge from his preferences and high standards. Aesthetic sensitivity was strong, and combined with his innate tenacity and quiet ambition means that he was quite successful in the arts. Even though he readily turned a bright face to the world, he did not always feel confident and strong. He had a lively sense of individuality, but his potency was sometimes too dependent on emotional familiarity, and the range of his self-expression too circumscribed within repetitive emotional patterns. Inwardly he shied away from encounters with the big, bad world, and early in life he may have needed to find ways of handling challenges that normally push the panic button. This wouldn’t have been hard for him because his creative drive was tremendous and his individuality needed recognition.

He was ambitious, sound at giving orders, carried responsibility well and was a good teacher, especially able to bring out the best in children. He believed in herself and generally knew the right thing to say at the right time, although he could show a stubborn and dogmatic side. He had a high opinion of his mental powers, and it was certainly true to say that he had plenty of mental energy. He was quite sociable and expected other people to behave well at all times. He was eager for close personal relationships, so he tended to have a wide circle of friends. Self-indulgence was a problem for him, as was laziness and conceit in relationships. He tended to be impatient with superficial details, preferring large-scale situations, and he disliked being tied down by obligations over which he had little control. Conservatism may have affected his creativity, artistic values and love affairs. This expressed itself as self-imposed restrictions or as selfishness. He often felt inadequate, which created an insidious form of oppression over all his forms of expression. He could also take herself so seriously, that people think that he was older than his years.

He was part of a generation that was strongly interested in humanitarian ideals, new avenues of communication and progress in mechanical skills. As a member of this generation, he was able to bring original ideas to both his career and spare-time interests. Crises in thought and ideology arose because he looked beyond tradition and old attitudes towards new original and inventive ways of looking at things. His active mind tended to need constant stimulation and his tastes could be quite fickle and difficult to satisfy. He belonged to a time of peace-loving idealism when the family unit and the way relationships were managed underwent great changes. He could be too idealistic and a little unrealistic when it came to matters of love, sex and romance. As a member of this generation, he tended to need to be motivated to make the most of his potential, because the line of least resistance appeared very attractive, especially when it involved pleasure-seeking. He embodied the Libra Neptune generation in the sense that he was a huge part of a time when beauty reappeared in fashion. He was part of a generation which was highlighted by the clash between authoritarianism and individualism. As a member of the Leo Plutonian generation, he wanted freedom in his relationships and demanded the loyalty of his friends as a right. As a member of this generation, he wanted power over his own life and was prepared to challenge established structures. He didn’t feel comfortable being dictated to, unless he in some way agreed to it beforehand. He was a part of excesses of the sixties. He was part of a generation that brought about a revolution in forms of entertainment, recreational activities and leisure time, as well as attitudes towards children.

Love/sex life: He was a lover so in love with the idea of love that nothing else matters. At times his whole-hearted idealism made him too optimistic and too easily deceived by people who promised to fulfill his ideals and then renege but, as delicate and unworldly as his romantic fantasy may seem, it was remarkably durable. Though he may have been misused and hurt, he never lost his faith in the power of true love. Issues of the flesh were always secondary to him and he was apt not to give them much thought. If such urges must be satisfied, then so be it. If sex proved useful in reaching other goals, that was fine too. As long as sex did not intrude on his ideal of perfect love such physical inconveniences hardly mattered. Unfortunately, most of the rest of the world did not agree with him on this point and, measured by their standards, his sexual behaviour may have seemed immoral or at least strangely naïve. He needed to learn to allow for such harsh realities even as he strove to create that grand idyll of perfect love.

minor asteroids and points:

North Node: Gemini

Lilith: Capricorn

Juno: Libra

Chiron: Libra

Vesta: Aries

Ceres: Aquarius

Pallas: Sagittarius

His North Node in Gemini dictated that he needed to prevent his idealism from influencing his thoughts to such a high degree. He needed to consciously develop a more clear-minded and analytical approach involving his thought processes. His Lilith in Capricorn dictated that he was dangerously attracted to women who had a scrappy plucky attitude hot-wired into their psyche. Against his better judgment, he liked to be around a woman who needed to be in control and to be mistress of her own destiny, because her life was in the control of not-so-well-meaning others as a child. Juno in Libra, he sought a mate who was harmonious, artistic, musical and intelligent. He liked beauty and balance at home. He believed in equal partnerships where all lived up to the letter of the law. Chiron in Libra, he often felt wounded in relationships and could wound others in retaliation. He may have felt he was constantly hurt or rejected in relationships. Through learning that he was whole on his own, he could have freed himself from this destructive pattern. He would have benefited from a partner that could have helped him heal in some way. Vesta in Aries, he was incline to initiate work for religious and humanitarian projects. Action came from a desire to improve every situation. There was a great deal of insecurity in self-evaluation. Ceres in Aquarius, at his best, he had tact and the ability to compromise, making him well liked by all. Pallas in Sagittarius, he had the ability to evaluate true personal worth enabling him to use his resources in the most advantageous ways. Other people may think he was lucky. Ideally speaking, he could have been generally positive instead of being wasteful, and he could have been confident and reliable. Nonetheless, he still used his ideas in a practical way, especially in his career.

elemental dominance:

air

fire

He was communicative, quick and mentally agile, and he liked to stir things up. He was likely a havoc-seeker on some level. He was oriented more toward thinking than feeling. He carried information and the seeds of ideas. Out of balance, he lived in his head and could be insensitive to the feelings of others. But at his best, he helped others form connections in all spheres of their daily lives. He was dynamic and passionate, with strong leadership ability. He generated enormous warmth and vibrancy. He was exciting to be around, because he was genuinely enthusiastic and usually friendly. However, he could either be harnessed into helpful energy or flame up and cause destruction. Confident and opinionated, he was fond of declarative statements such as “I will do this” or “It’s this way.” When out of control—usually because he was bored, or hadn’t been acknowledged—he was bossy, demanding, and even tyrannical. But at his best, his confidence and vision inspired others to conquer new territory in the world, in society, and in themselves.

modality dominance:

cardinal

He was happiest when he was doing anything new, and he loved to begin new ventures. He enjoyed the challenge of claiming territory. He tended to be an initiator—and a bit territorial as well. Also, he had a tendency to start more things than she could possibly finish.

planet dominants:

Moon

Sun

Venus

He was defined by his inner world; by his emotional reactions to situations, how emotions flowed through him, motivating and compelling him—or limiting him and holding him back. He held great capacity to become a part of the whole rather than attempting to master the parts. He wanted to become whatever it was that he sought. He had vitality and creativity, as well as a strong ego and was authoritarian and powerful. He likely had strong leadership qualities, he definitely knew who he was, and he had tremendous will. He met challenges and believed in expanding his life. He was romantic, attractive and valued beauty, had an artistic instinct, and was sociable. He had an easy ability to create close personal relationships, for better or worse, and to form business partnerships.

sign dominants:

Leo

Libra

Cancer

He loved being the center of attention and often surrounded himself with admirers. He had an innate dramatic sense, and life was definitely his stage. His flamboyance and personal magnetism extended to every facet of his life. He wanted to succeed and make an impact in every situation. At his best, he was optimistic, honorable, loyal, and ambitious. He loved beauty in all its guises—art, literature, classical music, opera, mathematics, and the human body. He usually was a team player who enjoyed debate but not argument. He was, at his best, an excellent strategist and a master at the power of suggestion. Even though he was likely a courteous, amiable person, he was definitely not a pushover. He tried to use diplomacy and intelligence to get what he wanted. At first meeting, he seemed enigmatic, elusive. He needed roots, a place or even a state of mind that he could call his own. He needed a safe harbor, a refuge in which to retreat for solitude. He was generally gentle and kind, unless he was hurt. Then he could become vindictive and sharp-spoken. He was affectionate, passionate, and even possessive at times. He was intuitive and was perhaps even psychic. Experience flowed through him emotionally. He was often moody and always changeable; his interests and social circles shifted constantly. He was emotion distilled into its purest form.

Read more about him under the cut.

Keith John Moon was an English drummer who played with the English rock band the Who. He was noted for his unique style and his eccentric, often self-destructive behaviour. His drumming continues to be praised by critics and musicians. He was posthumously inducted into the Modern Drummer Hall of Fame in 1982, becoming only the second rock drummer to be chosen, and in 2011, Moon was voted the second-greatest drummer in history by a Rolling Stone readers' poll. Moon grew up in Alperton, a suburb of Wembley, in Middlesex, and took up the drums during the early 1960s. After playing with a local band, the Beachcombers, he joined the Who in 1964 before they recorded their first single. Moon remained with the band during their rise to fame, and was quickly recognised for his drumming style, which emphasised tom-toms, cymbal crashes, and drum fills.  He occasionally collaborated with other musicians and later appeared in films, but considered playing in the Who his primary occupation and remained a member of the band until his death. In addition to his talent as a drummer, however, Moon developed a reputation for smashing his kit on stage and destroying hotel rooms on tour. He was fascinated by blowing up toilets with cherry bombs or dynamite, and by destroying television sets. Moon enjoyed touring and socialising, and was bored and restless when the Who were inactive. His 21st birthday party in Flint, Michigan, has been cited as a notorious example of decadent behaviour by rock groups. Moon suffered a number of setbacks during the 1970s, most notably the accidental death of chauffeur Neil Boland and the breakdown of his marriage. He became addicted to alcohol, particularly brandy and champagne, and acquired a reputation for decadence and dark humour; his nickname was "Moon the Loon."  After moving to Los Angeles with personal assistant Peter "Dougal" Butler during the mid-1970s, Moon recorded his only solo album, the poorly received Two Sides of the Moon. While touring with the Who, on several occasions he passed out on stage and was hospitalised. By their final tour with him in 1976, and particularly during production of The Kids Are Alright and Who Are You, the drummer's deterioration was evident. Moon moved back to London in 1978, dying in September of that year from an overdose of Heminevrin, a drug intended to treat or prevent symptoms of alcohol withdrawal. (x)

[hansolmates]

jjk; angel’s trumpet [01]

summary; one second, your life is flashing before your eyes and the next, you’re transported into a world exactly like your own. but the jungkook you meet in this world isn’t a renowned singer or your former almost-lover, in fact he has no clue who you are and why you know him so well. as you work to find your way home lost and confused, you conclude that you’re either dead or in the middle of the most wicked drug trip of your life. pairing; idol!jk x reader (f), alternatively film producer!jk x reader genre/warnings; fluff, angst, supernatural, idol!au, non-idol!au, alternate universes, themes of fate, language, alcohol consumption, mentions of smut in future chapters w.c; 2.7k a/n; after spending an entirety of june on this fic im proud to release it! this story is based on the prompt “I’m losing my mind!” for @btsghostiewritersnet​ BGW Bingo Bash! I hope you all enjoy this mini series and stay tuned for this wild ride

[01] [02] -> masterpost

“Just give it up!” Jungkook snaps, and you flinch at the sudden raise in voice level. Jungkook is a soft spoken person, only really having the audacity to speak up at the strength of his friends or when his body burns with attention after a performance. The fact that he chooses to use this tone around you, gets you seeing white hot. 

“How can I give up something that hasn’t even started?” you shoot back just as stubbornly. He won’t even let you in his room, and it pains you that he wants to fight out in the hallway where anyone could walk in and see. You glare at the heavy arms that bar your way inside, as if he’s creating a barrier for you, both emotionally and physically.

You hate this. For the past three months you’ve hated this version of yourself, manifested between the strained relationship of you and Jungkook. It pains you to see each other like this. Jungkook’s ears are tinged red with fever, simultaneously a little sick and a little annoyed at the fact that you wouldn’t let up. 

It wasn’t always mismatched stares and bouts of mixed signals whenever you two entered a room. There was a time when it being in each other’s presence was like a breath of fresh air, a bakery full of nothing but sweets and mouth-watering confections. That’s not to say that your relationship with Jungkook was, or is easy. After all, Jungkook chose a life that is never meant to be easy, no matter how far deep. 

But at the crux of everything, deep in your gut, you know that the both of you have that spark. 

“We can’t be together.” Jungkook states simply, pressing his coral lips together in a thin line. “My career! The traveling, the media, my crazy schedule, all of this, it doesn’t match.” 

It doesn’t match. Like the way a toddler puts a triangle block in a square space. In your opinion Jungkook is pointing out shallow, baseless reasons. You’ve gotten this far together, not quite addressing any officiality but leading to it. If all of his reasons really mattered, you wouldn’t be here right now. Unfortunately, Jungkook’s deciding to cut the line when the two of you have already sunk so deep. 

You’re both hurting, Jungkook doesn’t want to admit that. 

“But that doesn’t matter to me!” you reason, and you’re crumbling. Jungkook was once a fighter, too. Today, it feels like it’s just you who’s taking a stand, grappling on thin slices of thread that resemble what little confidence Jungkook has in the both of you. “I want to keep you grounded. I want to be the person you come home to.” 

Jungkook’s face reaches the final boss: a frustrating shade of scarlet, stunned at how shameless you are. You didn’t care, you know what you and Jungkook feel for each other is real. 

In a fit of emotion your hands reach for the crook of his elbow, grappling the black fabric between your fingers. It’s enough to ignite heat in your veins, starved of touch from so many nights apart and text messages that weren’t enough to convey how you truly felt. 

Jungkook’s eyes drag from your grip to your face, eyes glimmering. You look so small in the large hallway, empty and echoing between both your heaving breaths. There’s acute control in his expression, as if he’s grappling to reach both an inner and outer peace with himself. 

You bite your lip, sealing away your whimper of protest as he takes his hand in yours, untacking your grip. He’s not rough, but not gentle either as your hand pendulums to your lap. 

He turns his back to you, and for the first time you’re glad he looks away because the tears have already fallen. “Maybe in another world, we’d work out. But not this one.” Jungkook whispers, slamming the door to his studio. 

•━━━━━━»•»💮💮💮«•«━━•••

“Baby, it’s okay! You’ll find a new person to love!” The neverending flow of liquor and poetics is provided by none other than Sehlyung, a fellow employee you befriended after you got hired as a language teacher. 

You barely register Sehlyung’s hopeful smile through your misty eyes. Feeling bloated with liquid and far too tired to reply, you bob your head against the bar table. 

Sehlyung is the epitome of a fun time, and the first person you thought of to help quell your aching heart. A relationship that first started off as snide jokes and offhanded work qualms that eventually turned into a deep understanding and care for each other. After a long day of work she pulled through for you, showing up at the bar like a warrior in emerald green pencil slacks and an untucked blouse. At the edge of the bar she absentmindedly winds a lock of pale curly hair, sipping languidly from her electric blue beverage. 

“Listen, I get it. You think it’s the end of the world because Jungkook seems like the perfect catch—” the pretty blonde pauses when she notices your lip tremble, “but! He’s not that perfect, y’know. He—he sweats, sweats a lot, it’s like he’s freakin’ Niagara! It takes forever to get outfits on him in-between sets, it’s like clothing a wet noodle.” 

You choke back a laugh, shaking your head. “That is one flaw.” 

“A-and he’s very,” she starts waving her hands around, plucking the answer out of thin air, “competitive? Remember that one time Nabi said he couldn’t finish that whole loaf of milk bread? And then he accidentally ended up eating the parchment paper?” 

That has you in a fit of giggles, recalling how scared he was when his urge to make Nabi regret her words bit him right back in the butt. The hospital’s personal phone became number 8 on his speed dial shortly after. 

A fond, tentative smile melts on Sehlyung’s lips. At least you had it in in you to laugh, which Sehlyung knows is a good sign. She runs her fingers over your hair, forehead damp from your previous wallowing and overconsumption. ”You’re gonna find yourself a simple, wholesome partner! One who’s top-tier normie and will have all the time in the world for you!” 

You grimace at the thought, despite how uplifting that sounds. You once thought that was the only life for you, a nuclear family with two point five kids (the half point being a puppy, of course.) While you wouldn’t mind that kind of life, after meeting Jungkook you decided long ago that all you ever needed in a relationship was his company and combined happiness. 

“Time isn’t the issue,” you slur, voice warped from how your lips fall tiredly against your arm. “This issue is that he doesn’t want to try.” 

Sehlyung doesn’t say anything to that, but instead prefers to pour you another glass of liquid despair. Of course, she knew how Jungkook got. Sweet and caring, but headstrong, letting nothing get in the way of his music. 

Evidently, you’re one of those things. 

“Boys are dumb,” she says simply, swinging her head back. 

“I’ll be okay,” you murmur, “it just hurts. There’s no closure, y’know? I feel it, I feel so much love for him. And I know he feels, he feels something.” 

Sehlyung bites her lip, placing a comforting hand on your shoulder. “Hey, I got you a gift.” 

That gets you to perk up, your head tipping a miniscule degree. She pulls out a glass, filled with a clear liquid. It’s small, almost vial-shaped, enough for barely two shots. Inside, there’s a young flower shaped like a bellsprout. 

“It’s angel wine,” she chirps, pulling your shot glass to give you a hearty pour. “The old lady was selling it when I was getting my mom her ginger wine.” 

“Hm, is it like ginseng?” you ask curiously, grabbing the now half-empty bottle where the wet flower sat. The bell shape, despite being bloated with residual wine, still clung vibrantly to the glass. The bumblebee yellow and sunset orange tint looking absolutely mesmerizing. However, you’ve never seen an infused liquor quite like this. 

“Think so,” Sehlyung shrugs, “I’m sure you’ll like it though! I told her about how you got dumped and she said you’d need this to cap off your night!” 

She snatches the bottle from your hands, making sure it’s sealed tight before slipping into your purse. “That wine’s special, baby,” she winks, “save it for yourself when you get home, alright?” 

“Gee, Lyungie,” you deadpan, swirling the fragrant liquid, “I’m so glad my boy drama is spreading to your wine dealer.” 

Your friend holds her own drink in a toast, urging you to drink up. You don’t need to be told twice, the floral liquid going down surprisingly smooth. It’s sweet, and your whole body tingles. It’s like the feeling of being outside, and the sun shines over your exposed skin like a warm kiss. For a brief moment, you feel like you’re seeing pink and orange, blissfully satiated. 

“Mm,” you hum, licking your lips in hopes the feeling will return to you, “that’s some good stuff, got anymore?” 

Sehlyung scoffs, only mildly jealous that you get that particular drink all to yourself. “I wish. An arm and a leg cost me that, my hometown is very far!” 

The rest of the night is a haze, a comfortable one. Sehlyung goes off about Namjoon and his countless wardrobe malfunctions, keeping her from going home on time one way too many nights. You talk about how you’re getting into real progress with Soobin’s English, and how he doesn’t complain his head hurts when he speaks in full sentences. Hopefully he isn’t too mad when you send him a pop quiz next Tuesday. 

Sehlyung’s cab drops you off first, and she bids you a hug and kiss goodbye. She tells you to come a little early before your first class, because she wants to redesign Seokjin’s blazer for a new shoot and she wants you to pick out the best crystals. 

You know she just wants to show off and that your opinion is minimal because most of the decisions are made weeks before, but the gesture is appreciated. From Sehlyung’s knowing gaze, you have a feeling that she’s also doing this because she wants to keep you at arm’s length for as long as possible. 

The cab zips away first, leaving you in front of your apartment complex. You’re teetering on your heels like an infant, and you’re surprised that you managed to fake-sober this far into the night. 

Speaking of. It’s beautiful outside. With a tired sigh, you wrap yourself further into your burgundy knitted scarf, begging for warmth. You feel a fresh bout of tears surfacing as you look onto the pale yellow moon, shrouded by thick ghosty clouds among the starless sky. You wonder if Jungkook is looking at the same moon, thinking the same thing. 

You shake your head and wipe your tears, absolving you of that romantic notion. Jungkook hasn’t had the time to look at the stars in so long. You imagine he’s probably either working or sleeping soundly in his bunk, completely oblivious of the semi-depressing night you’ve had. You don’t know if it’s a blessing or a curse that Jungkook doesn’t have the opportunity to dwell on feelings for too long. 

The midnight sky starts to flicker, as if night and day are competing for dominance. Either that, or it’s really late in the night and early in the day. Your vision starts to blur, and you wonder if the secretary at the front desk would be so kind as to help you up to your apartment. It’s embarrassing, but it’s better than you cracking your skull open in the middle of the hallway where anyone can find you. You clutch your head, bemoaning on how much alcohol must be running through your blood if you’re hallucinating this much. 

Wiping your bleary face, you dig into your purse for your keys. Upon pulling out the key your favorite lip balm rolls onto the street. A little part of you feels like leaving it behind so you can get to bed, but it’s your favorite one and you are so close to finishing it. Muttering a curse at the thought of bending down at the possibility of you vomiting in public, you quickly scramble to the ground. Your knees buck at the pavement, tiny stones digging into your skin. Focusing your gaze on the pink and blue plastic, you reach for the glittery tube. 

Unfortunately, you’re not quick enough to notice the moving truck swerve the corner and skid towards your body. 

•━━━━━━»•»💮💮💮«•«━━•••

The first thing you notice is that it’s unbearably bright. Like when you vegetate in a dark classroom watching a movie, and the teacher suddenly flips the lights on without warning and your brain panics from the shock. 

You’re also painfully sober, as if you didn’t have a liquor-based dinner. Your bladder doesn’t feel like a small child is sitting on it, and you’re wide awake. 

Someone’s yelling at you, their voice shrill from emotion yet gravely from the early morning. Suddenly there’s a whip of hot air against your hair and a harsh skid as the smell of tire on gravel fills your nose. You’re on sensory overload, and you don’t have the capacity to care about your surroundings. 

This is probably the third time you have to mentally repeat to yourself that it’s daytime, the sun shining brightly on your fallen form. Your body is splayed out in a half-starfish position, and you quickly close your legs in fear of someone seeing up your skirt. You put up a hand to cover your face, and it’s instantly snatched up by a larger one. 

“Hey, hey! Are you okay? I know I turned the corner pretty fast, but you shouldn’t be standing in the middle of the street like that!” the person calling you sounds frantic, frustrated at your lack of response. 

Your eyes flicker to the small jet black cruiser strewn across the sidewalk, haphazardly parked. Fingers curling around the person’s hand, you look up at their face and scream. 

It’s now their turn to collapse on the floor, eyes wide and terrified. Their soft black hair is fluffy and sweaty from using their helmet, now rolling away from their grip. 

“What?” he screams back, as if there’s something on his face. His hand whips up to clutch his collar, undoing the top button because he’s starting to sweat profusely. “Are you really injured? Do I need to call an ambulance or something—” 

“Jungkook!” you cry, ripping the woolen scarf from your neck to wrap it around the top half of his face. You scramble between his legs, making sure his piercings, tattoos and any other identifiable part of his body is concealed. You don’t even think about your fight from last night, knowing that it’s miniscule in comparison to Jungkook being swarmed by PR. “Kook, what the fuck? It’s broad daylight, you can’t be out like this without a mask! Where on earth did you hide that bike? Why—are you wearing fucking pastel green? Since when have you added color to your wardrobe?” the boy noticeably pauses at the attention to his outfit, tensing under your ministrations. “Dispatch will have your ass and the devil Min Yoongi’ll kill you again for sneaking out—”

It’s then that Jungkook snaps, two strong arms pushing you away like paper. You don’t expect Jungkook to ever lay a hand on you, and with a surprised yelp you’re painfully shoved onto the pavement.  

“Get off of me!” he cries, and throws your scarf on your lap. “Who the hell are you and why do you know my name?” 

He’s scared, holding his helmet like you’ve burned him. His doe eyes are glistening and dewy, as if you’re someone he should be running away from. 

“Jungkook—” and as you hold out your hand to him, you realize. 

I’m losing my mind, you think, clutching your head to double-check no injury has come to your brain. His hair is much, much longer. It waves and falls into his eyes, as if he’s just gotten out of bed. He’s wearing a backpack, and you notice some crumpled post-its sticking out of the zipper. Clipped around his neck is a university ID. Heck, he isn’t even wearing an outfit you recognize. Gone are the cargos and oversized sweats, replaced with professionally tapered dress pants and a plain polo. 

Is...  is Jungkook wearing khakis? 

It’s daylight, you’re sober, and the Jungkook that’s standing in front of you is not your Jungkook. 

[sleepylixie]

The Dreamwalker- Incubus! Hwang Hyunjin

Word Count: 1.3k

Genre: Fantasy

Beware of: Elements of mental imbalance(crazy behaviour), Elements of smut(only mentions, nothing specific at all.) 

A/N: THIS FIC DOES NOT REFLECT THE CHARACTER OR LIKENESS OF THE REAL HWANG HYUNJIN IN ANY FORM OR MANNER. ONTO THE FIC!! I had a power struggle with this one, making the words sound the way I wanted them to ( @aliceu​ and @rebecca-noona​ welcome to the cult yet again. Today we’re serving Sex on the beach with a side of Fantasy Fries)

Requests are open for SKZ and BTS! || Masterlist

Ever wondered how wrong a dream could possibly go for it to become a nightmare? One that leaves you unmoving, still as a statue, even in the deepest of sleep? But what if the stillness wasn’t from terror but from.. from desire? Ask the Dreamwalker, he could show you.

Demons couldn’t create, they were ruled by their penchant for destruction- until the first succubus came along, with an entirely different kind of lust. 

Lilith. She was a headstrong woman, the kind that was unshaken from her beliefs and gladly stood trial and punishment for them. 

After being banished from Eden’s Garden, she lived amongst the mortals, reduced to a fraction of her full powers but still, more powerful than humans.

Lilith fell in love with a mortal man, a mortal king who commanded respect and power, the exact kind of person she’d dreamed of for herself. 

She was shot down the second the king came to know of her true nature- a creature rejected by the heavens, the mother of everything unholy. 

Her screams of pain ripped the sky apart as she flew to safety, bringing down thunder and lightning behind her. 

Her blood rained down to the ground as she created the Demon plane, outside the bounds of everything holy where she could reign supreme without fear

Where drops of her blood fell, there sprang a new race of demons: the succubi and their male counterparts, the incubi.

They were the youngest and newest race of demons but the strongest in their destructive power- They wreaked havoc over the mortal plane with great glee,

their strength came from the darkest fantasies that humans kept locked securely within themselves, particularly of the sexual kind. When a mortal spent enough locked in an incubus’ spell, they lost their wits to the point of madness

At which point the incubi gladly fed off their life forces, reveling in the sweet tang that the newly-damned souls left on their tongues

All of them were devastatingly beautiful, almost angelic in appearance, with their soft skin, silky hair and shapely bodies 

but none more beautiful than the youngest of them all

His name was Hwang Hyunjin.

The Nightmare, some called him, others knew him as the Dreamwalker

There was something about him even his kin couldn’t shake, much less the mortals he fed on

Maybe it was the shape of his face: angular yet soft at the cheeks, narrow hooded eyes with the darkness trapped in the pupils, lips that looked like they were sculpted by mother Lilith herself

Or maybe it was the way he was built:  lean, tall and sharp where mortal bodies were sharp and soft as they were soft but still, carried the aura of something so distinctly otherworldly even without the black wings balanced on his back. 

But it was definitely the way he could make even the most depraved, sex-crazed fantasies into an illusion of love and passion

There was not a single mortal Hyunjin hadn’t succeeded in feeding on because of this depraved skill of his 

Like his looks weren’t enough, he also had to be one of the best incubi there ever walked the Earth.

Of course, with creatures that shined so bright in their depravity, disaster was sure to come knocking 

and surely enough, it did.

//

Demons couldn’t love, they were ruled by their penchant for hate-under the first incubi came along, with an entirely different kind of chaos.

Incubi and Succubi felt love as Mother Lilith once felt love- not as a wholesome, fuzzy feeling of warmth as the mortals do 

but as an ell-encompassing hellfire gone wrong, endless and destructive in it’s affection.

It was rare as it was devastating, for succubi often couldn’t control what they felt in their unholy souls for their significant others and often gave their existence away in pursuit of their lover

Hyunjin had seen enough of his older siblings go mad in the sham called love and decided that he would never want to walk down that road for himself. 

He loved his life and his demonic status, he needed nothing more 

Or so he thought, until he saw Amaretta.

Like her name, she was from a foreign land Hyunjin had never deigned to visit 

but one look at her made him wish that he had, 

for what an infallible beauty was sweet Amaretta, with the brightest skin and the clearest eyes, the sweetest smile and the softest hair. 

She carried a scent of jasmine and hibiscus with her, under a deeper tang of an addicting mortal liqueur that always lingered around her.

Hyunjin had to have her, he decided. She was too beautiful, too pure, too...untouched for him to pass up the opportunity

She didn’t pose any difficulty to get to, it was almost like she was waiting for him to find her, the way her shadowed eyes gazed into him as he prowled closer 

and oh, what a dreamland her mind was for a deviant like him

The most indecent desires and the most sinful fantasies that were symphony to his ears 

And oh, how beautifully her body responded to his touch, the most lovely whimpers and the most musical moans that only he could coax out of her rosebud lips

Her aura just begging for him to come back to her every night like she was the flickering flame and he was the smitten firefly, he couldn’t have enough of the beauty that was Amaretta

Hyunjin was bewitched by her existence to the point where he even forgot about feeding on her at all- it became about her pleasure, the kind of toe-curling pleasure that he could give her, so easily 

that it satisfied him even despite the lack of feeding

He didn’t realize it for what it was, that the charm that he had fallen under was the very same curse he had vowed to run from.

Mortals couldn’t withstand the seduction of an incubus for too long, but Amaretta held to her sanity for an entire month before the strings in her mind came undone.

Something broke inside Hyunjin to see his sweet Amaretta, who once shone like the sunlight at dawn, reduced to a mere shadow of her old self

Was it guilt?

He couldn’t bring himself to appear before her when the time came 

Even when Amaretta began to see him everywhere that he wasn’t, even when she was shunned by her village and left in the wood to the wilderness

It was when a panther nearly attacked her that he tore the wild cat apart, then watched 

as Amaretta threw herself at him, smiling a smile that was so vastly different from the one he was used to seeing from her 

Her hair sticking out in the most ghastly way, her eyes sunken into her skull

She looked dead on her feet, a walking ghost 

Hyunjin knew there was a soul left in her, one that was all his for the taking 

But why didn’t he feel the victory he normally felt after a successful hunt?

What should’ve tasted like sweet lemonade on Hyunjin’s tongue now tasted like powdery ash

His honey-eyed, sweet-smiled Amaretta. Her soul was damned, now another lost soul trapped in the Demon plane  

All because of him

So this was the insanity his siblings told him about 

To be able to see the one you care about with all of your sinner’s soul and not be able to do anything when you’re the one that’s causing them all of the pain.

It did drive him crazy, so incredibly crazy that he lost the need to feed,

 it was like all of the life forces he had ever consumed had set a fire inside him, chanting about the wicked harbringer of death that he would forever be. 

He wandered the world as a ghost of his former glory, never again taking pleasure in the fantasies that had once riveted him 

Feeding was a chore now, not an unholy cat-and-mouse game 

Everybody knows about the youngest true incubus of Lilith who was once all blonde hair and dangerous beauty, a tale of caution for a broken heart, a reminder of how flying too close to the sun will always have end in a savage fall to the ground.

[wordsbynathan]

WIP INTRO

title: Peel

genre: queer fantasy/sci-fi

category: young adult

setting: Wisteria, NY; present day

POV: dual 1st person present

status: drafting

themes+tropes: family, identity, mental health, generational trauma, found family and friendship, autonomy, queer relationships

vibes: a plane blinks out of existence; the spiral of a blood orange peel; paint swatches tacked to a corkboard; scoops of ice cream piled so high they should topple; dusty basements with old tomes and articles that expose horrendous truths; trashcans full of chewing gum wrappers; interlocked fingers tugged apart by cosmic forces

one-line pitch: angsty gays accidentally discover inter-dimensional travel

epigraph:

"Someone said the sky is falling, tell me, is it true? Everything's alright when I'm with you Let's just stay asleep 'Cause when I sleep, I still can hear you Let's just stay asleep" —Ingrid Michaelson, "Mother"

(synopsis, characters, and excerpts under the read more)

synopsis:

Fletcher Kaplan's life isn't perfect, but until the final semester of high school, at least it's normal. He works hard for his grades, has a boyfriend who loves him and a great relationship with his single father. But when he wakes up exactly eighteen years after their move from Pakistan to the United States with the echoes of a nightmare ringing in his ears, he starts to question his reality. He wonders if the story he's been told about his mother's death is all true, but more pressing is the fact that Fletcher starts to see things, think things, and he's too afraid to tell Ellison for fear of scaring him away. When the eccentric and intimidating Corinne approaches him and validates what he's been experiencing, Fletcher decides to put his trust in her. As soon as they start to get answers, everything seems to come crashing down around them.

Ellison Moon has it all. His family may fight and his sister Astrid may be challenging to get along with, but they're ultimately a tight-knit unit. He's the captain of the Wisteria High basketball team and it looks like he may be leading the team to their first championship win in years. Most importantly, he has Fletcher, who he loves. In fact, Fletcher has no idea how much Ellison loves him because he's terrified of how deeply he feels. When Fletcher starts to act mysterious and even lie to Ellison, he attempts at first to ignore it but finds this impossible. He wants to be with Fletcher forever, but more and more it feels like Fletcher is going where Ellison can't follow. In the wake of an earth-shaking trauma, Ellison's internal world collapses and he uses up all of his emotions; with newfound clarity he realizes he can follow Fletcher forever, but in doing so he opens the door to chaotic impossibility.

main characters:

Fletcher Kaplan—POV • 18 • Intelligent • Dreamer • Nostalgic • Anchor

Fletcher is used to moving around due to the fact that his father is almost always in the market for a new job, but he's been blessed with the opportunity to finish all four years at the same high school. Despite this being the first time he feels like he can actually plant roots, he only really has two friends: his father and Ellison, Fletcher's boyfriend. Not until existence begins to crumble does Fletcher realize the importance of reaching out and grabbing tight to other hands. Until then, he fights off stray thoughts that feel like they're coming from an external source and hopes he can prevent his tiny family from slipping through the cracks of this reality. And the next.

Ellison Moon—POV • 18 • Loyal • Restless • Cunning • Stubborn

Ellison is one of four members of the iconic Moon clan—a family to end all families in Wisteria. Though he's well-mannered, he has a rebellious streak; Ellison's always chewing on something to soothe his fidgety nerves, and he does all he can to find loopholes in his parents' rules. As an openly gay athlete, he has influence in multiple worlds and commands respect with the combination of his athletic talent and goofy but warm demeanor. When Ellison feels, he feels deeply (often to a fault), and he does all he can to hide his weak spots.

Corinne Stetson—17 • Wise • Savvy • Eccentric • Analytical

Corinne is the class weirdo, but nobody would dare make fun of her. She's bizarre but insanely intelligent, and it's a wonder why she hasn't skipped a grade or two. Her deep red hair is littered with streaks of bleach blonde and there are rumors that she hides sharp objects in her fiery mane. She becomes an unexpected spiritual guide for Fletcher, as she has a useful brand of otherworldly knowledge that he lacks. As their paths converge, she comes to realize that Fletcher has plenty to offer himself, if she can just get herself to open up and let somebody in.

Astrid Moon—16 • Witty • Headstrong • Artistic • Persuasive

Despite the fact that he's a complete idiot, Ellison is still the perfect son, a standard Astrid feels she can't live up to. So she'll let Ellison be the favorite and follow her own path, piercing her ears with safety pins and cutting her hair in the mirror, dressing in all black some days and in pink the next. There's nothing Astrid values more than bodily autonomy and a girl's right to make her own choices. This is what draws her to Corinne like a moth to a crimson flame; she helps Astrid see her potential, and it becomes clear that Astrid has a bigger role to play in their lives than she could have imagined.

~*~*~*~*~

excerpts:

It’s as if the plane never existed.

Then, there’s some kind of hiccup and it’s back. I force my eyes shut and open them wide, repeat this, try to make sense of what I just saw.

Far away, the birds dip below my line of sight.

Goldenreed is only ten minutes away, but it almost feels like you could pack a whole live into that time if you just figure out how to measure it correctly.

The cafeteria chatter drones on around us, the excited buzzing of teenagers who have no idea that they’re hurtling through existence on an infinite orange peel that’s blighted at the end.

taglist (tagging general; if you’d like to be on the taglist for Peel please let me know!!! <3): @my-liminal-spaces​ @ahowlinwolf​ @sugarcoatedglass​ @chloeswords​ @rainbowcoloreddays​ @alicewestwater​ @ryns-ramblings​

[jamespotterthefirst]

Drinks For Two

Pairing: Dr. Ethan Ramsey x F!MC (Dr. Lilac Allende) Word count: 1,800 Warning: None Author’s Note: That premium scene from Book 1, Chapter 2 at the bar from Ethan’s POV 

Catch up here.

_______

The raucous cacophony surrounding Ethan that evening at Donahue's is not enough distraction from his traitorous thoughts, much to his annoyance. Ordinarily, the small bar serves as his sanctuary, a blessed transitional space between the harsh demands of the job and the tranquility of home. On most nights, he prefers the place silent enough to enjoy his drink in numbing peace. Upon entering the place and seeing the crowd of intoxicated, uproarious interns, however, Ethan kisses that fantasy goodbye. 

He decides to stay anyway because lord knows he needs a drink after the hell hole of a day he had. Ethan, ever the optimist, even finds a silver lining in hoping that the mindless, drunken chatter will keep him from reliving it. When that fails, the riotous noise is nothing but that: noise. 

Ethan takes a swig of his drink, savoring the pleasant burn in his throat. 

“I don't want your opportunities or your charity. I want my patient to get better.”

Memories of fiery, bright eyes flood him, unbidden. 

“And if that's not everyone's priority at this hospital, I'd rather you fire me now.”

Righteous, impassioned anger had colored her face as she spat the words at him with a vehemence that had given him pause. And all after he had placed a precious learning opportunity on a silver platter for her taking? Who the hell did this intern think she was? The nerve, the gall, the idiotic insolence of that brash, silver-tongued, headstrong girl...

Ethan loses steam. 

That passionate, fearless, intelligent and rather pretty girl.

 A slew of less professional adjectives inundate his awareness before he can stop them. Inwardly groaning, he throws back another drink. 

An eruption of cheers and wolf whistles mercifully pulls him from his thoughts. Ethan doesn't need to look to know it's coming from the surgical interns, the rowdiest of the bunch by default. Add to that scores of cheap alcohol and the galvanizing promise of competition a game of dart brings, and they are downright unbearable. 

When he does spare them a glance, he is greeted by the sight of a burly, good-looking surgical intern dipping a brunette backwards before planting a scandalous kiss on her lips. 

“Get it, Lahela!” 

“Traitor!” 

God, how Ethan hated PDA. 

A whirl of green fabric and glossy brown hair is all Ethan sees as the recipient of the kiss straightens herself, slightly woozy and gripping Lahela’s muscular arms for dear life. It is only when she shifts on her feet that Ethan catches a glimpse of that distinctive smile— the very same he had seen all day, both in person and in his recollection. Lilac Allende, pretty face bright and eyes sparkling, grins at the surgical intern as he whispers something in her ear. 

And then, like a stroke of lighting, her eyes meet Ethan’s for the briefest of moments. 

Ethan glances away too quickly, his slight annoyance tapering into sheer irritation. His mood deteriorates when he finds his glass empty though he doesn't get the opportunity to order another because mere seconds later, he can see a hazy shape in forest green approaching. 

Stubborn as ever, Ethan determinedly avoids gazing her way. He foolishly thinks this will be successful until she is right at his side and practically impossible to ignore. This, of course, does not escape her notice, officially deeming her the most frustrating person he's ever met. 

“Something wrong, Dr. Ramsey?” she asks and he can practically hear the cheeky grin in her melodic voice. 

As his eyes take in the full force of the outfit she is wearing, he mentally determines the only thing that is wrong are the thoughts the revealing number invites. He makes a conscious effort to keep his eyes on her face and not on the tortuous path her daring neckline sets. Ethan loses the battle for a millisecond because his eyes fall on the black, lacy contraption peeking from her blouse (if he can call it that), the sight a sweet kind of torture. Feeling like an absolute ass, he fixes his gaze on hers, convinced he can still salvage both of their dignities by saying something vague. 

“Just noticing how… different you look out in the real world.”

Dr. Allende looks as though she doesn't believe him and she opens her mouth, perhaps to brashly tell him so. Luckily, Reggie slides over to their side of the bar. 

“What'll it be?”

She becomes distracted by the question and Ethan privately thanks Reggie's impeccable timing. Dr. Allende pensively chews her lip as she contemplates his empty glass. Ethan pauses, promptly telling himself this is to humor her while also satisfying his own curiosity and not because of the vision that is her bottom lip, made swollen by the pressure of the bite. 

“Scotches, neat,” she finally tells Reggie, with a confidence that almost earns her an impressed nod. 

In their silence, Dr. Allende cuts him a look that is almost bashful, despite all the bravado she displays. Her posture is ramrod straight and Ethan can practically feel the nervous energy radiating from her. With a bolt, he realizes she is silently extending an olive branch. A truce from their previous encounter at Edenbrook. 

“Why neat instead of on the rocks?” he asks, his own quiet way of accepting. 

“The ice changes the flavor,” she returns at once, shoulders relaxing visibly. 

“Right answer.”

A ghost of a smile escapes him and she takes this with evident satisfaction, returning it with a smug smirk of her own. The crowded, ebullient bar suddenly becomes stifling to Ethan as he holds her gaze. To make it worse, someone decides that is the best moment to play an Al Green song on the jukebox. 

Reggie returns with their drinks, saving him again. 

“You know I can't be bribed into favoring you, right?” Ethan keeps his face masterfully impassive, his voice expertly controlled as he says this, the first thing he could think of to deter from it all.

“I think you already favor me.”

God, she is good. That clever little quip is enough to inspire a quiet laugh from him, the sound almost foreign to his ears. 

“You keep believing that,” he returns almost at once. 

This, in turn, makes her match his laughter. Before he can squash it, Ethan feels a proud jolt of satisfaction at being the one to cause the sound. 

Reggie returns, noticing their empty glasses. The loaded grin he flashes Ethan leaves no doubt the older man caught the exchange. 

“Two specials,” Ethan says, ignoring this. “Thanks, Reggie.”

“Only for you, Ethan,” his old friend returns with a chuckle, his eyes moving over to Dr. Allende before he moves away to prepare his order. 

She sends him a curious look. “You're on first-name terms with the bartender?”

“He's an old friend. I come here most nights.”

Ethan can see her considering the statement quietly. “You don't have anyone waiting at home?”

Ethan hesitates, marveling at her tone, easy and casual as though she was asking for the time. Shifting in his seat slightly, he consciously refuses to look for any meaning behind the question. 

“I'll come here even when I do,” he responds after a long pause. “I need some buffer between the hospital and the world. An airlock.” Briefly, he thinks of Harper and the many arguments that became too constant in the last months of their relationship. 

“Don't take the job home with you, Lilac.” He's not sure why he utters the advice, but it is gone from his lips before he can stop it. Vaguely, he realizes that is the first time he calls her by her first name. 

Dr. Allende doesn't seem to notice. She considers him, biting the inside of her cheek. “I'll keep that in mind…” she says, “but you didn't answer my question.”

Ethan decides then that sharp perceptiveness will be his demise. 

“No. Nobody waiting at home tonight.”

There is no reaction because his order arrives. 

Grateful, Ethan offers her the dark liquid. “Here, try this.”

Dr. Allende accepts the drink wordlessly. She swirls it around in the glass before taking a careful sniff. Ethan almost rolls his eyes though he'd be lying if he said he wasn't amused. Seemingly satisfied, she downs more than half of it with spectacular skill. 

“Well, how's it compare?” he prompts, unable to keep that insistent need to know what she is thinking at bay. The way she assesses the empty glass between his fingers, her jaw working as she collects her thoughts only adds to the allure. 

She meets his eye with a grin. “That's amazing!” 

When he finds no indication of dishonesty on her face, Ethan allows another wave of self-congratulatory smugness. “Either you're sucking up to me, or you've got surprisingly refined taste for an intern. ”

The lopsided quirk of her lips leaves him entirely too charmed for his liking. “I'm surprising in a lot of ways.”

“You'll have to prove that.”

The words are redundant for she had been doing just that from the very instant he met her. 

Eyes locked on hers, he raises his glass. “To your intern year. In the hopes you don't completely blow everything you've worked your whole life for.”

Dr. Allende scrunches that freckle dusted nose of hers. “Morbid,” she comments, though not without a signature smile. “I like it.”

Their glasses meet, the clink of the crystal lost in the revelry around them. 

An upbeat pop song he is too old and too prideful to know the name of booms through the speakers. It is met with approving cheers from the drunk crowd. Over the hubbub, the sound of her name reaches them. 

“Lilac!”

It is from a group of interns at the other end of the bar. Ethan briefly recognizes the short, bubbly one as the intern who pulled him away from his furious rant earlier that day. 

“Are we dancing or not?” she yells over the music. 

Lilac turns to Ethan who only waves his hand dismissively, encouraging her to go. As she turns to join her friends, she halts, turning to consider him quietly. 

For a wild moment, Ethan thinks she might ask him to dance. Drink in hand he selfishly considers what it would be to dance with her, bodies close and lost to the beat of the music. Where might her hands be on his body as they moved? Where would his be? He vanishes the thought with more determination than necessary, though the heat that flares from his neck to his face is impossible to ignore. 

Perhaps realizing she is not quite so brave, Lilac shoots him one last smile and simply says, “Good night, Dr. Ramsey.”

“Good night, Dr. Allende.”

________

Author’s Note: Who could have put the Al Green song? Hmm. 

Thank you for reading!

At the risk of committing to an ambitious endeavor, I really want to do as many of these as possible. I think my next one will be from the Dolores chapter.  

_______

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[know-the-way]

I know it’s really stupid of me but I was kind of hoping for a redemption arc for Faustus. 😅😢

It’s not stupid, not at all! It’s natural to want to see the best in people, particularly when you believe they can be better than what they are now, so it’s completely understandable.

And, ya know, if the show gets picked up - he may have one yet still, we don’t know!

To me, this season really highlighted what the purpose of Faustus’ character is supposed to be, imo. Thinking of episode 4, we’re shown three different levels of corruption through three different characters.

The first is Harvey. Pure, sweet, golden boy Harvey is revealed to have some deep-seeded hatred of witches. Does he have any reason to hate witches? Well, let’s check - he lost a brother, got manipulated, controlled, and lied to by his first love, and has been in an endless cycle of extreme danger for the past year of his life. I think it’s fair to say we all understand that prejudice is not okay, but is it equally understandable why Harvey has some hang-ups about magic and witches? I personally think it is. (Not to the point of joining a literal witch hunt or angrily accusing your distressed best friend of killing your dad at her 17th birthday party 🙃, but understandable nonetheless.)

I personally think the intention with Harvey’s character being a cadet in Blackwood’s army was to demonstrate how, even when we believe someone to be morally good and just, they can become someone else when they endure pain and that pain is never properly addressed.

Did Sabrina apologize to Harvey for everything that happened between them? Yes. But did she repeat the same troublesome behaviors in different ways after that? Also yes. She didn’t demonstrate change in her actions, and a loootttt more happened with Harvey and the witch world in a negative way beyond his relationship with Sabrina, so the mistrust he feels isn’t entirely unjustified.

Then - “oh wow, oh my God, my second love has also hid being a witch from me, can I catch a fucking break here? Why should I ever trust another witch in my life?”

Answer: because they are humans, none being wholly good or bad, and they love you.

Roz talks to Harvey, tells him she believes he’s good, and demonstrably proves her own “goodness” by sacrificing herself to save others at Dr. C’s. Roz shows Harvey that she means what she says and her feelings for him are real - that she is a scared, broken human like him, just trying to do her best with what life has given her. Hence, when the moment of truth comes - Harvey remembers his humanity and proves his own “goodness” by saving her. But if Roz had never spoken to him, never acknowledged what he’d been through and that his feelings were valid... if no one had ever truly cared about his pain? It seems apparent that Harvey would have continued down a very dark path.

Which brings us to...

Mary. Mary has been literally murdered, had her identity hijacked by a demoness, her fiancé is dead, she doesn’t remember several months of her life, and her previous favorite student is a witch who has seemingly performed magic more than once on her.

Mary has every right to fear witches at this point. She has had zero trustworthy interactions with the witch world and from her perspective - her entire life has been stolen and no one cares. No one checks in on Mary, no one validates her pain, and as a result - no one in the witch world seems to have any compassion, humanity, or kindness in them. Enter the Pilgrims of the Night, who recognize her pain and fear without even knowing her, acknowledge it, and offer her solace in their congregation on the basis that her experience with witches is shared by the Reverend Lovecraft and his flock.

They prove themselves to her when the advice the Reverend/Faustus gives her (“let the dark in”) saves her life. My God, someone finally seems to care if she lives or dies!

People who care about others are good, so the church and the reverend’s mission must be good, too. Therefore, she is absolutely invested in whatever is asked of her and will blindly follow their lead in order to protect others from experiencing what she has. To me, Mary in the perverted universe represented the crossroads of corruption - where you truly believe what you’re doing is the right thing, even if it hurts others because those “others” have hurt you... and they will surely hurt again if you don’t stop them.

However, I think if Mary was finally told the truth - the full truth - and Lilith herself apologized for being the first piece in the puzzle... along with all the other witches... AND they showed that they actually cared about her well-being... Mary could find her way back through forgiveness. Or, at the very least, she could understand and process everything so that she could find a way to heal that doesn’t involve persecuting others.

And now, there’s Faustus. We aren’t entirely clear on Faustus’ history altogether, but we do know he’s had many experiences of being slighted by the churches of darkness (despite following the rules to a T).

He was rebuked by Edward for wanting to marry Zelda after mentoring him for who knows how many years, lost the office of high priest to him, and when he finally gets the title - here comes Edward’s self-righteous brat to fuck him over again. There he is trying to carry out the Dark Lord’s request to get Sabrina to sign her name in the Book of the Beast, even though she insults their doctrines and faith at every turn, and the coven and academy he’s had working like a well-oiled machine for the past 16 years is being slowly ripped apart. Why is the Dark Lord allowing this? Why is he having to endure a meddlesome child’s antics? Why is he not being rewarded for doing exactly as he’s been asked and returning the Church of Night to stability after Edward nearly destroyed it altogether? Like hello Dark Lord, can you throw me a fucking bone here?

Small victories - he finally secures Zelda’s hand in marriage and an audience with the anti-pope. This is what his life should’ve looked like two centuries ago, but no matter. He’s correcting it all now and by Satan, nothing is going to stop him this time.

But then...

Oh cool, Sabrina is here to intervene again and has presented the text of his old rival for consideration along with his (clearly superior) manifesto. What’s that, you say? Oh, she’s also gonna crash my wedding, accuse me of murder, and spread claims about my manifesto without having even read it? Wow, ahaha, sounds hilarious... except why am I not laughing?

He arrives in Rome and gets an inkling that the Dark Lord may finally be taking action about this heretical little monster because he’s offered the title of anti-pope by the unholy high council themselves. Finally, some appreciation! He just needs to hang on a little longer, eliminate these small meddlesome threats, and soon he will reside over a peaceful kingdom far removed from anymore mortal nonsense.

Oh, for fuck’s sake, what do you mean Sabrina convinces the council he’s unfit to be anti-pope? This is bullshit, man! You know what? Fuck this place, I’m gonna make my own damn church and ensure no other headstrong witches like Sabrina Buzzkill Spellman can ruin it. That’ll finally return things to ord- MY WIFE KEPT MY OWN CHILD A SECRET FROM ME?! WHAT THE FUCK?! Alright, that’s it, The Spellmans are clearly here to poison others (ironic foreshadowing) - time to wash my hands of them completely, I am so over thi- what’s that? The Dark Lord’s here? GOOD. About time this asshole showed up to set people straight and remind them that the values of his unholy church, which Faustus has exemplified perfectly, must be respected.

You mean for me to bow down to whom now? The halfbreed brat who has been directly and willfully wreaking havoc on the congregation he’s patiently and painstakingly lead back to greatness? Are you fucking serious, m8? No. Absolutely not. No. I’m getting out of here, and since I won’t have the little twat poison anyone else, I will literally poison them instead. Be free, sheep!

It’s up until this point that I believe Faustus was still mostly at the crossroads stage, same as Mary. He believed everything he was doing was the right thing, based on the teachings from the religion he devoted his entire life to, and that he’d be rewarded for serving the Dark Lord so faithfully - until the Dark Lord proved several times in succession that his religion was all a lie. That three+ centuries worth of groveling and abiding and waiting has meant absolutely nothing.

So now we have the Eldritch terrors. Beings more powerful than the oldest gods. He spends 15 years isolated in a time bubble purifying himself, devoting everything to them, and won’t it be so glorious when they welcome him into his ranks? He’s set them free now, after all, they owe it to him.

But doing the same action over and over and expecting a different result is what? The definition of insanity, friends. Of course the Eldritch terrors reject him, too... of course Sabrina gains their attention and veneration instead... of course he should have tried to seize their power for himself a long time ago... so, fuck it all, he’ll do that now. There is no right and wrong, there is no observed justice - if there was, he would have been rightfully recognized for all the time, effort, and pain he’s endured only to receive nothing in return.* No one ever acknowledged his pain... no one ever even considered it. Over time, that takes its toll.

(*Clearly, I mean this to be from Faustus’ perspective and not my own.)

Of course, he has inflicted more than his fair share of pain himself and I am of the personal belief he needed to pay for that, but... equally imagine being hurt over and over and watching those who did it walk away, not only without reprimand, but with the belief that they were right and just to do it? Could it slowly drain on one’s soul to watch the rules apply to some and not others? Debatable, I suppose, but I personally think yes.

So... I say all of this only to point out that there is still potential to acknowledge his pain. And thus, there is imo still potential to understand, communicate properly (I am very interested in any conversations he and Sabrina may have had during their training - I know he said she took a vow of silence, but clearly some talking occurred for Sabrina to learn so much about the void from him), grow, and finally - for him to be given the chance to repair everything he had a hand in breaking. It wouldn’t be an easy or painless task to get to that point, and no one would be faulted for not trusting him to do so, but I think there is potential for it. If they get picked up and they want to finally allow the characters some time to reflect and process shit, they could include Faustus in that.