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damien-gray-ffxiv · 10 months

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Fate in Shades [Pt. 2]

As Damien had followed Bruce, he had spent the entirety of the walk to the library analyzing him. He was tall, broad and clearly quite strong. Stronger than the average Hyur and certainly stronger than any worldly strength that Damien possessed. He had not seen many Roe up close and it was clear that this one’s allegiance was strictly to Vahalia. Damien had made a mental note to not further his place on Vahalia's bad side just at the sight of the stoic male. When Bruce come to a stop and turned to gesture towards the library, Damien simply nodded at him. “Thank you, uh…Bruce.” He’d offer coupled with a pursed-lipped smile which was received well enough and even Bruce had mirrored the gesture back before Damien stepped into the library.

It had not taken much time for the amber-haired man to find her. She had been seated with her back to where he now stood and his hands moved to clasp themselves behind his back as he cleared his throat in a means to gather her attention, it was enough to startle her slightly.

“Sorry!” Valeria called out before having seen the arrival of the guest. She moved from her position on the chair and put the book down she had been –clearly – engrossed in, as was ever the case with her, “Damien?” She blinked upon seeing him standing near the door. It was surprising to see he had come so far from when she had last known him to be, even more, that he was…standing in the Cress estate and unscathed; a pure testament of her sister’s patience.

Damien's had slowed as she had placed the book down and turned to face him. He hadn’t seen her since they had met in Tailfeather and despite their continued correspondence via letter, it had taken him a moment to drink in the raven haired woman's features. His gaze fixated on her bicolored eyes as his softened. He had done his best to whisk away the tiredness that had been clearly evident on his features with Vahalia and he offered her an uneven grin.

“How – I mean I suppose that’s a bit of a question, isn’t it? How have you been?” She stood and adjusted her skirts out of the way to make her way past the large table that sat in the center of the room. Like much of the estate, this room was well-lit as well and cozy thanks to the ever-burning fireplace. There was a different ambiance that hung in the air here – it was relaxing and inviting almost intimate and quiet with very few windows to make the space feel exposed.

“I had a request of your sister,” he offered in response to her loaded question. He didn’t seem inclined to keep a good majority of things from Valeria should she ask him though he spared her the details of his request for now. “I have certainly been better,” Damien replied as he approached her from his position by the door. It had only taken him several strides to close most of the distance between the two of them. “I had considered sending Alain as promised, but I thought my presence would be enjoyed more than he.”

“Indeed! Well, of course, Alain would have been welcome as well. But with you here I wouldn’t have to pick his brain to get more than a few words. Do you plan on coming back to Ishgard any time soon or are….you and Cordelia still on the outs?” She knew he spoke of altercations and that tensions had been high previously via his letter but…

“Cordelia and I have not spoken since since I had left Ishgard,” he admitted as his gaze dropped from her. Mead colored hues would fixate on the ground beneath him for a lingering period. “I have acquired some business within Valnain,” the way in which he spoke was calm and collected. He had chosen his words wisely to soften the blow. “Alain and Laurant have been securing the necessary prerequisites before we depart.”

“So… you’re leaving and setting off on the other side of the world? That's a long way away.”

“I am,” he replied as he brought his eyes back up to her bicolored ones. “I would hope that it would not be for too long but I cannot bring myself to leave without telling you.” His lips would flatten into a tight line as his jaw clenched. There was a moment where he had brought his hand up as if to extend it towards her before Damien has hesitated and dropped it back at his side.

“That’s kind of you. I suppose it’s better that you tell me face to face rather than through a letter. I think I would do the same if I were in your position. Why are you heading out that way if you don’t mind me asking?” Valeria smiled gently as she knew full well she had signed herself up to tasks Vahalia had for her – a tinge of jealousy within that Damien seemingly got to travel and explore.

“I’ve come into a rather significant parcel of land southwest of the Skatay Range,” his reply was quick and he moved to tuck his hands into the pockets of his trousers. “It was purchased sight unseen so I am unsure of the status of the land. If there are any buildings that are livable and what needs to be constructed to get the settlement up and running.”

Her bright eyes blinked several times, “Land? Did you get an inheritance of some sort?” her expression shifted and she looked rather jubilant at the prospect, “Oh! I’ll have to come and visit some day then once you get things sorted, that’s so exciting! What do you plan on doing first when you get there? Have you been there before? Do you think the weather is nice there? I mean it should be right with how warm the location is known to be. Have you seen Valnain before? I haven’t but Vahalia has told me stories of when she was there recently. Of course, my family is from that area but I never really knew much outside of that.” She paused, finally, after her onslaught of questions and statements.

He couldn’t couldn’t help but laugh quietly at her continuous questions. If anything, Damien found her flurry of words endearing. “Valeria,” he spoke quietly as he had finally found the confidence to raise his hand up so that it would lightly cup her cheek if she had allowed him to do so. “Come with me. Leave this behind and experience these things for yourself.”

The idea was nice, the gesture even nicer and sweet. The sensation itself would have caused a warmth in her belly or a touch of heat to her cheeks but it was overshadowed easily by the unsettling feeling that sank into the back of her throat, “I….can’t.” she nearly whispered, “I promised Vahalia I would attend lessons and make sure to play a more active role in the House. I want to learn, I really want to learn all these things because I know it will assist me later in life especially if I even have to take the reigns.”

Reaching up, her fingers found the edges of Damien’s hooking to hold what part of him she could. It was strange, having this freedom she was given back but the only one holding her back was currently herself, “Perhaps we should both work hard at bettering ourselves so we can be more prepared later to be able to explore more?”

The rejection probably would have been hard in any circumstance, but in this instance it had been a little bit harder to stomach. If her hand had not moved up to take hold of his fingers, he likely would have pulled his hand away. “I think you would do well at Vahalia’s side,” he reassured as he offered her a forced smile. It was different than his usual, easy smile and his lips pulled into a tight, thin line.

Valeria smiled lightly, “I would very much like to visit after I get some lessons under my belt, perhaps when you are better suited to have company?”

He recollected himself by hardly swallowing the lump that had formed in his throat and blinking several times as she had quickly carried on with the topic. “That’s also true. I couldn’t have you sleeping on a bedroll in the dirt in good conscious,” he teased briefly in an attempt to break the tension of their previous comments. “I suppose I will have to have a home constructed on the property before I can invite a noblewoman there.”

The idea of a bedroll wasn’t something she could see herself finding relief in, how anyone slept on those things were a mystery to her. Part of her felt awful, thinking that Damien himself would likely find himself within one at the end of each day but she also knew of his hobbies and how he favored the outdoors and hunting. He seemingly had a knack for survival. “I suppose better you than me.” She finally admitted. As openminded as she was, Valeria knew her health wasn’t something she could take lightly, even if it was as simple as sleeping in a bedroll on the ground. Harmless to some.

She had hardly noticed she had still been holding his hand and for the briefest of moments she contemplated drawing away, remaining modest – who was to say he might have returned at all, perhaps he’d find happiness in the land far away. It wasn’t the first time a man didn’t want to wait for her. Would it be too much to ask? Did she even have that right? Why did it even matter?

Valeria was, well, Valeria. And while she knew Damien didn’t mean any harm or was selfish to consistently reach for more than he was allowed, there was no reason why she couldn’t. “Try not to forget me while you’re there? I know things happen and people come and go in our lives but at least remember me if your feet take you further and further from here…” From her, she wanted to say but perhaps it was too bold. Far too bold to simply put into words or a question or simple hopes.

He was leaving to see to some business abroad, why did she get the sinking feeling she might not have ever seen him again? All that mattered was she wanted some peace from that deepening thought and without permission she felt her body against his when she stepped closer, as close as they had ever been in the sense that one had overstepped – she had crossed that line and a hand shifted to the front of his chest, “Please take care of yourself.” At the lack of space between them, it was easy to see she wore a new necklace, it was long and gold in color that hung low and past her sternum, nestled against the material of her bodice – Damien’s ring well kept at the swoop of the end.

His reply to her initial question had been halted by the movement of her inching closer to him. His chest had shifted from a normal pattern of breathing to a shallow rise and fall. The only evidence that he was still breathing was the pattern of his shoulders just barely moving. His frame leaned into the feeling of her hand as the only thing that had separated the two of them was the fabric of his tunic. With his eyes peering down at her, it was hard to ignore the golden chain that she now wore and what resided at the middling of it. The familiar ring that had graced Damien’s finger until recently had weighed down the necklace and he would move a hand to gently scoop the ring up into his palm so that he could examine it briefly. He carefully dropped the ring with a slight smile etched on his lips as his hand moved to pull on the leather that hung around his neck so that it now lay outside of his tunic. The necklace that she had previously given him had been slightly modified to fit him more as a necklace than a choker but still contained the original leather that she had worn for years.

“I still very much wish that you would come with me,” he murmured as his hand returned to gently cup her cheek and his thumb softly caressed the porcelain skin. “I admit that I fear your duty to your house will betroth you to another and the woman who I’m leaving here will not remain when I return.”

The second touch – his words – all of it so charming and sweet. A veil found its way over her senses, hazy, almost punch-drunk. She had a whole speech of things she wanted to say and could have said at the moment. Promises wouldn’t have been enough, she knew this. There was a blossom and swell that raged within her core, fearing he might have felt just how hard her heart had been beating – beating for him. A language only another could only fathom.

Valeria had done the unthinkable when all sense had left her body and with feather-light tenderness, her mouth sought his, daring a small chaste gesture, one in which she had to hike herself to toe tips to be able to seek.

The place where his hand had resided had only remained there for a moment longer as it shifted to delicately rest along the side of her neck. His shoulders hunched in an effort to bring himself down closer to her. The embrace of their lips was brief and when they had pulled themselves away, Damien had kept himself still hunched slightly to savor the closeness of their embrace.

“Does that mean I shouldn’t worry?” He whispered in a husky exhale.

At his question, her eyes fluttered and the realization of what she had done began to sink in, “I – sorry….I probably shouldn’t have done that.” Valeria’s hand fell to grasp at the necklace between her and Damien that had been around her neck and she took a step back – a little flustered. “I suppose in some roundabout way, yes. I’m not to be married off nor do I think I would change much in your absence as I would hope you wouldn’t either but I think it gives me something nice to look forward to. To…work hard here at the things I need to task myself with and devotion to my health so that I can visit sooner.”

Her apology was unwelcome and Damien’s face was a clear indication that had rejected the notion that she should have even thought to apologize. He had heard her words, but they had not registered as they normally would as Damien sought to close the gap between them once more. Both of his hands moved to hold along her jawline and in a swift motion he leaned forward to press his lips to hers with more fervor than their last embrace. It was clear that Damien was confident in this regard and perhaps almost as self-assured as he was when it came to his prized creatures. However, it was clear to him that every interaction he’d had before this was different with the way that his stomach settled uneasily but not in the same fashion that would make one ill.

Words clipped, attention swiftly sought as he demanded it, and instantly without hesitation or resistance, the woman simply melted into his touch – the kiss. Easily disappearing into the moment while her head swam and the one and only thing she had done aside from returning the kiss fervently, her hands had reached to grasp tenderly at the front of his vest; much without her noticing she had been, or she simply didn’t care.

Dizzying, serene, and in the moment she truly tasted him – a heady flight cut short by the sharp rap of knuckles on the door behind Damien which startled her, “Miss Valeria, is everything alright in there?” Bruce’s voice came from the other side of the wood.

It was clear that the both of them had become lost in the moment. The only care he had was for the subtle dance of their lips and the way that the skin of her neck felt under his callused hands. He wasn’t entirely surprised that he had missed the knocking on the door by Bruce's sturdy hand, but the voice is what had caught Damien’s attention. He had pulled away from her far enough to remove his hands from her neck but not her hand from his vest. There was a quick and somewhat anxious clearing of his throat as Damien half expected the large Roe to be standing there as he turned but the door had still be closed and their privacy still in tact.

“I suppose it would be best for you to answer him,” he suggested with an unsure shrug. “I get the feeling he doesn’t like me much but maybe just doesn’t like anyone who isn’t you or your sister.”

Gathering herself, Valeria pulled away from Damien and stepped towards the door as she opened it, “Ah Bruce, apologies we were engrossed in conversation. All is well.”

“Glad to hear it milady, Annette says she’s made somethings for your guest before his leave.” The tall Hellsguard lofted a brow as he peered in the room, “A request of your sister to ensure Lord Gray makes it back well enough and with good fortune.” The large hand of Bruce pressed to the face of the door pushing it open and her shot a gaze to Damien, “You should make some haste boy or else Annette will box your ears.”

Damien had remained at the spot where they both had previously stood as his hands found themselves clasped behind his back. A means of distracting his idleness. A brow lofted as Bruce had mentioned that things had been prepared for Damien’s departure. He supposed it was their way of making sure that he went on his way sooner rather than later. Damien’s hands had fallen from behind his back as he made his way towards the door and stopped behind Valeria so that she was in between Bruce and himself. “Would you like to see me out?” He asked her and offered an uneven smile should she turn around enough to notice it.

Which she had and Valeria offered a small nod, “Of course! I’ve spent enough time in this library this evening as it stands.” She motioned her hand towards the corridor as she offered Damien a small look and then up to Bruce with a reassuring smile.

Damien had given a glance up towards the face of the male Roe and offered him a slightly uneasy nod. Damien was far from small and was incredibly capable of handling himself but the much larger male had placed him on edge. It was obvious as to why, but Damien managed to squeeze past the male while maintaining eye contact. He’d release a steady exhale of relief after he had made it through the doorway and caught up to Valeria’s side. When they were momentarily out of sight of the Roe, his fingers crept down to brush against hers. “Should you need anything for Clotho, Castile will remain here to tend to my personal birds. He will be more than happy to help.”

“I can contact him any time at the address you are now?” She asked, trying not to giggle at the little display in passing as it caught her off guard.

“Yes, that is the manor that Ambrose purchased for me shortly after he married Cordelia,” he replied rather flatly. “Castile, his son, Renae the caretaker, and the stablemaster will all remain while Alain, Laurant and I are away. I will make sure that they are aware of you and you will have access to the entire manor should you need it.”

“That’s very sweet of you. I think I would like to bring them some goodies while you’re away if that is alright? I’ve been taught it’s in good manners to bring something when you visit people, especially for the first time.”

“You’re more than welcome to bring them anything you’d like,” he offered with a cordial nod. “I will advise them to treat you just as they treat me.” It was a large gesture but one that Damien was more than willing to accommodate for her. He was more than happy that someone would be willing to spend time with his birds in his absence and perhaps the socialization for Clotho would be beneficial. Castile would also prove a helpful tool in Valeria’s training with the raptors.

Valeria smiled and stopped as they came out into the foyer, by now it looked as if though Vahalia had already taken her time and business elsewhere and was out of the office. A lovely aroma pulled through the main floor of the house, an inviting and tantalizing scent. “Are you traveling via the Aetherytes this evening or chocobo? It’s quite cold this evening, have you everything you need?”

“You should know me better than that by now to assume I wouldn’t travel by chocobo if I had the option to.” He chided rather playfully as he stopped alongside her in the foyer. “May I ask you something?”

She chuckled, “Yes, I like to think I know you quite well.” Her eyes veered a moment seeing Annette from the corner of her eyes seemingly placing the travel goods and a heavy fur-lined cloak on one of the ottomans by the door. The elderly lady could see quite well that they had been in the thick of a conversation and opted out from interrupting. A small, thankful smile was afforded by Valeria as she looked back to Damien when spoke, “Of course.”

His body had shifted so that he could face her now instead of simply standing beside her. It was likely the last time he was going to see her before he had left and the timeline of when he’d return was unclear. “Should this venture work out and I return relatively unscathed, I would like for you to consider allowing me to court you.” It was a question rather than a statement. He wanted her to know that she had a choice rather than an arrangement being made for her. “I am unsure if my status would be sufficient for your house and your sister, but I would like to make my intent known regardless. If you’d have me that is.”

A series of blinks came from Valeria as she stared at Damien, dumbfounded. She had considered a myriad of questions but not the one he had posed. She was caught off guard but it only seemed to cause her to chuckle nervously, “ I – yes! I mean, of course, but….you will come back for me, yes? You’re not just going to forget about me? What if you meet someone? I suppose I would appreciate it if you were to at least send word if you change your mind.”

Her question had caused his brow to rise slightly as he gave her a puzzled look. Perhaps his actions in the library were not enough to enforce where he stood. In another attempt to outwardly prove where he stood, his hand reached for one of her own. “If there is one reason to come back to this frozen place, it’s for you,” he spoke quietly. In that moment he hadn’t entirely cared whether Vahalia herself had observed them. He was leaving and there was even uncertainty within himself on if he’d be successful. The Viera in the area were highly territory and multiple sources had warned him of this. His hand guided her hand up to rest on the leather necklace that he wore that was still outside of his tunic so that her palm could rest over the silver disc. “I will return here for you and no one else until you no longer wish for me to be here.”

Pools of spring green and gold darted over the various parts of his face, burning little blemishes and marks, curves and freckles into memory. Scars, tone, texture – anything that she knew to be him and the face she had stared into dozens of times, “Okay.” she finally stated in agreement, “I believe you when you say that, not that I feel I could never believe you.” she felt the horoscope disc under her palm, warm to her flesh, “Try not to lose it, okay?”

“If it’s lost then so am I,” his reply was earnest and his hand pressed itself over her own for a moment before he had pulled away. Damien had moved to where the items had been carefully placed by Annette and he reached for the fur-lined cloak. The weight of it in his grasp was hefty and he knew that the layers would keep in warm in the cold air of the night. His motions were quick and he brought the cloak around his shoulders and clasped it at the base of his neck as he reached for the bag that the items had been placed in. “Vahalia’s training will be good for you,” he mused with an audible hum. “And you’ll be an asset to the house in more ways than just burying yourself in books.” Golden orbs would give her one final look as he turned towards the large door to the estate.

“Be good.” Valeria’s voice called out before Damien had left entirely, her hand finding some comfort in the ring that hung around her neck, nestled tightly in her grasp.

Collab with @spirit-speaking

Mentions: @vahalia-cress-ffxiv

#stories #collab writing #an equally long read #ship name in progress

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joah-shipper · 5 months

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I’ll Hold Your Hand

The Next Step | Eldon x Nick Hurt/Comfort

~~~

Eldon is sat in the studio’s office, finishing off on some paperwork. After the day he has had, he just need something to get his mind away for a few hours.

The past few months since his break-up with Thalia have been difficult enough, but he thought he was doing good at hiding his distress. Now with the news all out in the open though, he wonders how he even managed. Barely a minute has gone by this day without him crying.

With everything else tuned out, he doesn’t even notice the studio-head walking in until he speaks up.

‘Oh, hello Eldon. Didn’t know you were still here. Thought you would’ve gone home by now.’ Nick says from where he stands in the doorway.

‘Yeah, just thought I’d get these papers finished, as-well and go over the choreography for Anthony and Adele’s duet again. Internationals is coming up soon and everything, so…yeah…’ He shrugs.

The British man still stands by the door, watching his friend. He is unsure how to broach this. After getting back from his workshop from Absolute Dance, it didn’t take long for him to receive the news about what went down that day.

It’s obviously a touchy subject. However, Eldon is his friend and he wants to help.

‘I um…heard about what happened earlier.’

That stops the former a-trouper, pen cutting at the side of the page, now seeming even more lost in thought.

‘I’m sorry about what happened with Thalia.’ Nick continues as he takes a seat on the desk. ‘I know it can’t have been easy. Moxxie and I splitting up was difficult enough and we were only dating for a few months’

No new words escape Eldon. All his attempts just choke him, unable to escape and only making his adam’s-apple bob. This doesn’t go unnoticed by Nick.

Leaning over, he rests a hand on the one the contemporary dancer holds his pen. The other man doesn’t pull away, instead dropping the piece of stationery.

‘Do you want to talk about it?’

‘I’m not sure where I’d even start.’ Eldon sighs.

‘Try me.’

‘Okay then….’ Holding his hand in-front of his face, he lets a breath out into them. Then he starts. It’s a bit terrifying letting this all out, but maybe it can help.

‘It’s just, we’d been together for so long. Heck, we even got together on our own run—up to Internationals, 5 years ago! After being through a couple relationships that ended really badly before that, I thought Thalia was finally the one.’

The older man gives his hand a squeeze during this pause, pushing Eldon to continue.

‘We spent that entire year working to get together and it all felt worth it in the end. She felt like another half of me, someone that shared all my strange quirks, even if others found them weird. We worked so well together that we even began running our own studio!’

At this point, it is when his eyes wash over with water. His tongue flicks around his mouth, his saliva making noise. If Nick wasn’t there, he’s not sure how he’d be able to go on.

‘But…maybe I was too naive, we were only 17 and 18 when we got together and everyone knows teenage romance doesn’t last. When we finally grew up everything felt different, the honeymoon stage was over and both of us were filled with so much stress from work and now just being adults. There was no room for all the dates and moments we shared as teenagers and…’

He takes in a gulp. ‘We just kind of faded away from each-other.

By now he is sobbing. Nick feels like doing so too. From hearing Thalia and Eldon’s whole story, and just by seeing someone you care about hurting like this, it’s almost too much to bare. His arms wrap around Eldon without a second thought, pulling his face to his chest. He doesn’t care that the tears are sure to ruin his shirt.)

‘I’m not going to pretend that everything is going to magically be alright. Because it isn’t. Breakups always hurt, especially the long ones. You’re allowed to feel like this. Nobody is going to be mad at you for it. We’re all your friends and we understand you’re hurting.’

Eldon gasps out: ‘But, how am I ever going to get over it? I’m supposed to me helping the team, I’m supposed to be helping 𝐲𝐨𝐮! But, here I am crying like a baby instead!

‘Oh Eldon, you’ve already helped me more than enough. I wouldn’t be able to run this place at all right now if I didn’t have you with me. You’ve done so much for me, and as your friend, it’s my time to return the favour. I’ve got you okay?’ Nick breaths. His voice is so gentle, filled with so much love and care that it almost makes Eldon want to cry even harder.

His friend is now sat in his lap, arms around Eldon’s neck, but neither mention it. If anything, Eldon finds it comforting. He isn’t sure why, but he doesn’t want to stop any of this.

‘Okay, thanks Nick, for being here.’

‘I always will be.’

Both men smile at each-other, tears drying on the younger’s, in a still silence under the moonlight of the office.

#tns #the next step #eldon #nick #internationalshead shipping #ship name in progress #eldon x nick #nick x eldon #hurt/comfort #we better get atleast some scene like this #romantic #platonic #can be read as either #then they fu-

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