#shout out to sam for helping me through my creative block

[the-nation-of-today]

And in the end we found our stage We gave these words of strength

[parkersbliss]

Twenty-Four | T. Holland

Pairing: Tom Holland X Female!Actress!Reader

Warnings: me trying to be funny, no-no words, me trying very hard to be funny, like really hard, but I’m not. Sexual innuendo.

wc; 4.1K

A/N: dedicated to the one and only Tom Holland, can you believe he’s 24?? I’m going to cry. Happy birthday Tom! Also let’s pretend I had a creative title. I’m really sorry this is so bad, a great idea came right when I finished :(

Synopsis: This year you decide to surprise time on his birthday. With the help of the boys, what could possibly go wrong?

Masterlist | Taglist | Prompt List

—

“Hey darling,” Tom spoke excitedly through the phone.

"hi baby," You greet in return, holding your phone to your ear with your shoulder. "What's up?"

"Just checking in on my lovie," He said.

You roll your eyes, a smirk playing on your lips, "sure, Tom."

He laughs, the sound making your grin, as you shift your phone to your hand, finally having dropped your stuff in the back of the car.

"Alright, you caught me. I was wondering if you were going to be able to make it to London?"

"Oh baby," You sigh sadly. "I wish I could, but they have to re-shoot some scenes here and they're keeping me for an extra week. Then I have press for a few weeks."

Tom huffs through the phone, "so you really don't think you'll make it?" You can hear the sadness in his voice and it breaks your heart a bit to lie to him like this.

"No, I'm so sorry. Believe me, if there was even the slightest chance I could be there, I would."

"I know, lovie, I know. Just haven't seen you in so long and I really hoped you'd be there."

You bit your lip anxiously, "I'm sorry, truly. I'll be sure to Facetime you."

"Okay," Tom sighs sadly.

"I love you, bubs," You said, hoping to cheer him up a bit.

"I love you too."

"I gotta go, I just arrived home, I'll speak to you soon?"

"Mhmm, miss you."

"Miss you more, all my love."

The line goes dead and you send Harry a quick text.

Step One: Completed. Tom has no idea.

...

"(Y/N)!!" Harry said, jogging up to you. He tackles you in a bone-crushing hug and you stumble a bit, wrapping your arms around the redhead. Sam follows up behind, laughing as he takes your suitcase from you. You hug Harry back, grinning at the warmth you received from the Holland twins. It felt like you were home again. 

"Jeez, Harry you'd think I died or something!" You joke, wiggling out of his grasp and going to hug Sam as well.

"Sorry, it's just you being here means Tom will finally shut up about how much he misses you."

"You still have two days," Sam points up, causing Harry to roll his eyes.

"Whatever man, at least she's here."

"Happy to be here." You smile as the three of you walk towards the exit, “What did you tell Tom?”

“Sam said we were picking up Elysia’s sister,” Harry replied. 

You nod your head as you push open the Airport doors. The London weather is a drastic change from the usually hot and humid L.A., but you very much prefer it. The sky was a bright blue, a few cotton ball clouds floating in the distance, occasionally blocking out the sun. There was a slight breeze, but nothing too chilly. It was just perfect weather, you could only hope it stayed this way until Tom's birthday. The twins lead you to the car and Sam deposits your luggage in the trunk as you open the door to the back. Both boys climb into the front, shutting the door behind them.

"So, what's the plan?"

...

Harry pulls into the driveway, announcing your arrival. He's about to get out of the car when Harrison comes running out the door. He gives Harry a deer in the headlights look, hands waving frantically. Sam rolls down his window, poking his head.

"What?" He yells.

Harrison sighs defeated, he gestures with his thumb behind him. Tom pokes his head out the door, a solemn look on his face.

"Get down!" Harry screeches at you, turning around. You slip off your seat, folding yourself behind Sam's seat. You hug your knees to your chest, holding your breath. There's a whooshing sound as Harry tosses a jacket over your head, trying his best to conceal you from his brother's eyes. Tom walks over to the car as Sam laughs nervously.

"Thought you were golfing with Harrison?" He inquired.

Tom sighs, "I wasn't in the mood. Where's Elysia?"

"What?" Sam asked, receiving a quick kick to his seat from you.

"Right! She - uh - we dropped her off at a cafe!"

Harry smacks his head down on the wheel, convinced Sam just blew their cover. Tom gives his brother a quizzical look, "You left your girlfriend at a cafe?"

"Yes?"

"Tom! Your dad needs your help to hang something!" Nikki shouts, trying to get her eldest son away from you.

"Coming mum!" Tom replies, leaving his brothers alone. The twins exhale loudly as he disappears inside the house. There's a loud commotion and your side door is pulled open and you tumble onto the pavement.

"Sorry!" Harrison apologizes, helping you up and squeezing you into his arms.

"Haz!" You exclaim, hugging him. "I've missed you!"

"I think we know who the favorite is," Harry mumbles. You step back from Harrison to see Nikki and Paddy approaching you. Nikki squeals, pulling you into a tight hug and you laugh.

"Hi, darling! Safe flight?"

"Hey, Nikki! Can't complain."

She steps back to allow Paddy to say hello.

"Hey, Padster!" You cheer, wrapping him in a side hug.

"Hi (Y/N)!"

"It's so good to see you guys," You gush. Ever since meeting Tom, you had become very close with his family and friends. As soon as he brought you home Nikki had gushed to you about how much he talked about you, making you smile. His family was very warm and welcoming and it made you feel at home.

"We've missed you!" Paddy said.

"Mum!" Tom calls out. Harrison immediately shoves you behind him and you yelp in protest, before clamping your mouth shut and trying your best to shield yourself.

"Yes, dear?" Nikki said.

"Nevermind!"

Everyone rolls their eyes and you cautiously step out from behind Harrison.

"So, how do you plan to sneak me in?" You ask quietly.

Everyone looks at each other, eyebrows furrowed.

"Well, we wouldn't be worrying about it if Harrison could keep Tom away!" Harry accuses.

"I texted you!" Harrison defends.

"With your shit phone, there's no surprise as to why I never got it."

Harrison rolls his eyes, sticking his tongue out at the redhead before turning toward you. "How many spy movies have you done?"

"Three?"

He claps his hands together, "I have a plan!"

"We might as well give up now!" Harry sighed, receiving a glare from Harrison.

"It's a great plan, mind you," He snorts. "If we can distract Tom long enough and pull him into the other rooms then we could (Y/N) upstairs without him noticing."

There's a moment of silence as everyone ponders the idea. They only had to hide you from Tom, that should be easy enough. Plus the house was big enough to hide you somewhere should it not work out.

"Let's do it!" Paddy grinned, "It'll be like a spy movie!"

"We don't have much of a choice," Sam comments, peering in through one of the windows.

"I'll bring him to the kitchen," Nikki offers, heading back inside. The three boys follow her, Harry tuning around to point an accusing finger at Harrison, "don't screw this up, mate."

Harrison rolls his eyes, "I won't."

You watch with keen eyes as a small thumbs up appear in the window, letting you and Harrison know the back entrance was clear. You both make a run for the back door, crouching low just in case. Harrison puts a finger to his lips, receiving an eye roll from you. He smirks, poking his head in the door to ensure Tom wasn't lurking around anywhere. He sticks a hand out, beckoning you closer. You comply, taking a few steps forward before a string of curses fall from Harrison's lips and he tumbles back from the door and tackles you to the ground. You bite your lip, caging in any sounds from his sudden attack. Your eyes bug out at him, eyebrows pinched together as a silent 'what the hell.' He mouths 'Tom' to you before poking his head in the window again. You push yourself into a sitting position, wiping up off the dirt from your outfit.

"Can you run?" Harrison asked, turning around.

"Yes, but are you sure that's-" He doesn't let you finish before he opens the back door and shoves you inside. Sam runs into the room, ushering you to the next room over.

"He's coming!" He half whispers half yells. Sam goes to stand next to Harrison, giving you a thumbs up and mouthing the word kitchen to you. Tom strolls into the room and Sam waves a discreet hand at you and you pull yourself from your hiding place and tiptoe to the kitchen. Your footsteps fall silently on the plush carpet of the living room and you feel like you can finally breathe since your arrival. However, the moment of peace doesn't last long and before you know it there's the scurrying of paws and loud barking. Tessa happily runs into the room, tail wagging happily when she sees her mom.

"Hi, Tess!" You whisper, bending down to scratch behind her ears. She barks loudly and you press a kiss to her forehead. "Mmm, I know, excited to see you too, but I'm here to surprise daddy."

"Tom, wait!" Sam shouts and you take that as your cue to get moving. You pat Tessa's head one last time before running into the kitchen where Nikki is waiting with Paddy. She leads you to the stairs as Paddy grabs Tessa to prevent her from chasing after you. She whines loudly and Paddy shushes her.

"Do you know where the guest room is?" She asked. You nod and she smiles at you, "I'll have one of the boys drop off your luggage once we get rid of him."

You laugh at her choice of words before thanking her and scurrying up the stairs. You stroll down the hallway, admiring all the baby pictures of the boys. Your eyes land on your favorite one of Tom. He's clad in a superman suit, lips pursed together as he climbs over the obstacle course. You study the picture a little longer, soaking in all the features of your boyfriend. Was he really turning 24? Seems like you just met yesterday, back when you both were both new in the acting business, just starting in your careers. Things seemed much simpler back then when your biggest worries were if you had made the cast. It was already your third year spent celebrating Tom's birthday. Oh, how time flies. It didn't feel like three years, more like three days. Your eyes scan the array of photos and land on one from last year's birthday celebration. It was taken late at night when most of the guests had cleared out. Tom had an arm around your waist and you were resting both hands on his broad shoulder, pressing a kiss to his cheek. The photo wasn't the best quality, as a drunk Harrison had taken it and the only light was coming from the living room. Nonetheless, it still held a special memory with it.

Drunk giggles escaped your lips as you stumbled over the carpet. You had ditched your heels long ago, but that didn't stop you from being a klutz. The night seemed to drag on forever, yet seemed over in the blink of an eye. You were properly tipsy, having drowned multiple shots (courtesy of the Holland boys) and drinking glass after glass of some fancy champagne. It was probably some time between midnight at two A.M. You weren't quite sure, having lost track a while ago and frankly, you weren't sure where your phone was either. You stopped walking for a minute to collect your thoughts. Where was your phone? Patting yourself down, you laugh at your stupidity when you feel it in your back pocket.

"(Y/N)?" Harry asked, poking his head into the room.

"Oh, hi!" You exclaim, turning around and almost tripping over your feet.

Harry takes one look at your drunken smile before sighing, "Tom! Your girl's drunk!"

"Liar!" You accuse, crossing your arms over your chest, a pout adorning your lips.

Harry rolls his eyes, slightly tipsy himself, but had sobered up enough to comprehend his thoughts. Tom comes running into the room, "What? Where is she?"

"Harry you tattletale!" You whined, stomping your feet on the plush carpet. Tom laughs at the sight in front of him, shooing Harry off with a wave of his hand. He walks up to you, reaching out to place his warm hands on the exposed skin of your arms, rubbing small circles on them.

"I don't like Harry," You pout, looking up at your boyfriend with big doe eyes.

"Mean either," Tom agrees, brushing a few strands of hair from your face.

"I heard that!" Harry calls out from the kitchen.

You both ignore him and Tom leans in to press his forehead to yours, you giggle, biting your lip. "happy birthday."

"it's midnight, so technically it's not my birthday anymore," Tom points out. You roll your eyes before pressing a sweet kiss to his lips. He whines when you pull away, not having enough.

"'m tired," You said, rubbing your eyes, a yawn escaping your lips. Tom chuckles as you latch onto his arm, resting your head on his shoulder. He presses a tender kiss to your hairline.

"then let's go to bed, lovie."

You arrived at the boy's flat with Sam and Paddy at two. Dom and Nikki had just left with Tom, keeping him away from where the party was supposed to be held later that night. You opened the door, dropping your bag in the corner and placing the rest of the decorations on the kitchen counter.

"We're here!" Sam announced, walking around and searching for the boys.

"Hello?" Paddy calls out, looking upstairs.

"No, you div! It goes this way!"

"But look at the instructions!"

"fuck the instructions, mate!"

"you all royally screwed this up."

"you're not helping Tuwaine."

The three of you look at each other, snickering as you walk into the open backyard. Tuwaine stands tall, arms crossed over his chest as Harrison and Harry argue about how to set up the table. Sam coughs loudly, causing them all to turn to you.

"And this is why we don't have nice things," You said smugly, smirking as all three of them roll their eyes. You laugh, pulling Tuwaine into a hug, "good to see you again."

"Likewise, it's nice to have a lady around here."

You giggle, stepping back, "I can imagine."

The six of you step into the kitchen to discuss the plan for setting up. Sam was (obviously) in charge of food, Harry and Tuwaine were on drinks and setting up the tables outside, which leaves you, Paddy and Harrison to work on the actual decorations. You're all about to leave and get started when the door opens.

"I forgot my wallet!" Tom announces. Everyone freezes, eyes wide as they realize the birthday boy was here. Tuwaine curses under his breath.

"Hide!" Harrison hisses at you, Sam and Paddy. Sam runs outside, ducking under a window. Paddy glances around frantically before deciding to tuck himself into a far corner of the kitchen, somewhere between the kitchen and the fridge. Which leaves you, the one person Tom absolutely couldn't see, standing in the open air.

"the living room!" Tuwaine whispers and you nod, ducking yourself behind the couch.

"Have you guys seen my wallet?" Tom asked, stepping into the kitchen. From your place behind the couch, you can see Sam's mop of hair in the window, and Paddy squished into the corner. He's holding his breath as Tom steps around the room. Harrison leans against the counter obstructing Paddy from Tom's view.

"No, maybe it's upstairs?" Harry offers.

Tom shakes his head, "no, I think I left it in the living room."

Harry's face falls, panic written all over it. Tuwaine looks from you to Paddy to Sam, not at all being discreet about it.

"You can't!" Harrison shouted.

Tom gives him a quizzical look, "mate, what do you mean?"

"You can't go in there!"

If anything, that just made Tom more curious and he rolls his eyes, stepping into the room. Unbeknownst to him, you were huddled up next to the couch, eyes screwed shut and practically suffocating. Harry runs into the room, standing behind you, ensuring Tom couldn't step back and see you.

"What Haz is trying to say," Harry said, voice laced with venom as he shot the blonde a dirty look, "is that we saw it in your bedroom earlier."

"why were you in my room?" Tom inquires.

"Because that's what friends do?" Harry replied, smiling.

Tom nods his head, "Right, I'll keep my door locked from now on." With that, he turns on his heels and runs upstairs.

"You can't go in there? You can't go in there?" Harry whisper shouts at Harrison. "How was that going to stop him?"

"Oh please, you said we snooped in his room!"

"Like you haven't."

"Guys, I think I'm stuck," Paddy's small voice said.

Everyone turns toward him, he wiggles around, frowning as he doesn't budge. You stifle a laugh, covering your mouth as the absurdity of the situation.

"Found it!" Tom shouts, feet thundering against the stairs. He stops at the door, noticing a familiar handbag in the corner and he feels his heart stop. Had that always been there? He blinks once, twice, trying to make sense of the all too familiar Chanel bag.

"Guys, why is there a Chanel bag at the door?"

"Shit!" You curse, knowing that if he opens the bag, he'll know you're here. "don't let him open it!"

Tuwaine crosses into the doorway, grabbing the bag from Tom's hands.

"It's a gift!" he said, clutching it tightly in his hands.

"For?"

"For (Y/N)!"

"I'm pretty sure she has the same one."

"Oh well, you know Harrison, doesn't know shit."

Tom laughs, Harrison, throwing Tuwaine a glare.

"You're right. I'll be on my way now, don't want to keep mum waiting."

Tuwaine nods, "alright, mate. Have a good time with your parents. We'll be waiting for you."

Tom smiles at him, patting his arm before he shuts the door behind him. There's a collective sigh from everyone. Sam brushing off the dirt from the garden.

"We are never doing this again," You said.

"No way," They all agreed.

"Hello?!" Paddy yelped, "I'm still stuck!"

You scramble to your feet, running over to the youngest Holland. He holds his arms out and you grab onto his hands, pulling.

"He's not budging!" You cry out, dropping his arms.

"That's because you have no strength," Harrison scoffs, butting you out of the way. He does the same, grabbing onto Paddy and tugging. You cross your arms over your chest, giving him a pointed stare when Paddy doesn't budge. Harry walks over and you all tug on Paddy, there's a satisfying pop as he flies out of the corner and you all land on a heaping pile on the floor.

Tuwaine and Sam burst out laughing from above, clutching their stomachs as they double over, wiping tears from their eyes. You shove Harry off, standing up and brushing down your dress.

"I swear, you guys are going to kill me."

"That's the plan."

"Divs."

...

Almost four hours later and you were ready. The house had miraculously been transformed, food lining the kitchen counter and cases of beer resting on the fold-up tables outside. There was a banner hanging from the doorway that read, "happy birthday, Tom!" Streamers and confetti were strewn across the room, all a mixture of blue, red, and gold. You had to admit the boys had done a pretty good job of cleaning the place up. Harry had told all the guests to park a while away so that Tom wasn't suspicious when he arrived. Nikki had texted the boys not too long ago, saying they were almost there. Which was why you were currently making yourself at home in Tom's room. The boys were all hiding downstairs, lights dim as they waited. They had told you to wait in Tom's room as a surprise to him. It was also a plus because you were still slightly jet-lagged. You were sitting against the headboard, phone in your hand as you waited for your cue. There's the faint sound of keys jingling before the door is pushed open.

"Hello?" Tom calls out, flicking on the lights.

"Happy Birthday!" All the boys shouted. You hear a loud thud, followed by a string of curses and many apologies. Snickering to yourself, you figure Tom just fell over. He was never good at surprises.

"Wow, you guys did all this?" Tom asked, a smile painting his face.

"Of course, mate!" Harrison chirped as he wrapped him in a hug, "Happy birthday."

Tom sniffles, "I just wish (Y/N) was here."

You begin your descent down the stairs, adrenaline pumping through your veins. You could finally see your boyfriend. Your footsteps are silent against the wood stairs, "who said I wasn't?"

Tom spins on his heels as his jaw falls open if he wasn't crying before he was now, "(Y/N)?"

"Happy Birthday, baby!" You squeal as he runs to you and picks you up spinning you around.

"You made it! You're here! It's actually you," He spoke into your neck, inhaling the familiar scent of your shampoo. You comb your hands through his chestnut curls, making funny faces at the boys behind you who were all gagging.

"You didn't really think I'd miss my favorite person's birthday, did you?"

"I might've."

You smile at him, lacing your hands together, "Well, it was all Harry's idea."

"Of course it was."

"Are you going to kiss me or..?" You ask.

Tom wiggled his eyebrows, "Missed these lips?"

"Honestly, I've missed you d-"

"There are cHILDREN!" Sam screams, covering Paddy's ears.

"Shove off, I'm fifteen!" Paddy whines.

The boys all leave the room, giving you both some much-needed privacy.

Tom laughs as they leave, before pulling you flush against his chest. He lets go of your hands, running them along your arms before cupping your cheeks gently.

"If you don't kiss me within the next five seconds-" You warn before Tom playfully rolls his eyes and presses his lips to yours. You wind your hands behind his neck, trying to pull him closer because, god, he tastes so good. His lips are warm and tender, pressing against yours in an ever so soft way, but still passionate at the same time. He pulls away, sticking his tongue out at you and you giggle, missing his funny faces he'd always pull on set. Tom laces your hands together, pulling them to his lips to kiss the pad of each finger carefully.

"I've missed you so much, lovie," He said softly.

You burn under his gaze, after almost four years and he still has the same effect on you. "Missed you more, bubs, but I'm not going anywhere for a while."

"I love you so much, you know that?"

"I love you too, birthday boy. Now let's not keep your friends waiting, I'll get you all to myself later."

The rest of the night is spent next to Tom's side, always touching. Whether it was a hand around your waist, his hands interlocked with yours or a hand placed gently on your thigh. He goes around to all his friends and family, joking with them all thanking them for coming. He especially jokes with you and the boys as you tell the story of how they snuck you around.

"So that was your Chanel bag!" Tom said.

"Sure was, I was hiding behind the couch and told Tuwaine if you opened it up you would for sure know." You learned your head on Tom's shoulder, his arms wrapping and pressing a kiss to your forehead. All the boys fake gagging at the display of affection. "That explains everyone's weird behaviors."

The whole table laughs, beer, and glasses of alcohol clinking together.

You lift your glass, "A toast to the birthday boy and to all of you for getting me here as safely as you could."

Everyone raises their glasses, clinking them together.

"Happy Birthday, Tom! Twenty-Four years down and hopefully many many more to come!" Harry toasts. "Thank you for being the best older brother we could ask for."

"The best friend we could ask for."

"The coolest movie star."

"And the best boyfriend," You add, "I hope to be by your side for all those other birthdays. Even when your curls are gone."

"Likewise, baby," Tom chuckles, before sealing the night with a kiss.

— END —

🏷 Holland Taglist: @cams-lynn @runway-to-my-aid @peterspideyy @yoinkyourheart @t-monosapiens-h @hollandsamor @quaksonhehe

[proxylynn]

Underfell: File Name not Edgy Enough #26

Chapter 26: Misery

WARNING: I WANT NO RESPONSIBILITY OVER SPOILING THINGS FOR OTHERS. THAT BEING SAID, THIS IS HOW FILE NAME NOT FOUND WOULD FUNCTION IN THE AU OF UNDERFELL. BEFORE YOU READ THIS, UNLIKE THE NICE TIME OF UNDERTALE, THIS WORLD IS KILL OR BE KILLED. THIS STORY WILL BE GRAPHIC, GORY, USE SWEARS LIKE NOBODY'S BUSINESS, AND DEAL WITH SENSITIVE SUBJECT MATTERS. FOR EXAMPLE, THOSE OF YOU WHO HAVE READ THE FILE NAME RELOCATED SPOOF WILL KNOW HOW I PICTURE THIS VERSION OF LYNSIE COMING TO THE UNDERGROUND. IT IS NOT AN ACCIDENT. IT IS NOT BECAUSE OF SOMETHING DUMB. IT IS BECAUSE SHE CHOOSES TO END HER LIFE. SO TAKE THIS WITH A GRAIN OF SALT. I MADE IT BECAUSE I NEEDED TO LET SOME OF THIS EDGINESS OUT OF MYSELF. WHICH I GUESS MAKES UNDERFELL LYNSIE EVEN MORE TRUE TO WHO I REALLY AM. ANYWAY, ENJOY. ^_^

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

[HOTLAND: LEVEL 2 MOMENTS BEFORE GOING LIVE]

Mettaton zooms through the air, the speed makes it hard to try to look for anything I can lock-on as a potential landmark. The worst part, I can't tell if Flowey is able to follow or can reach this far safely. Who am I kidding? Flowey has the best odds of making it around here without a scratch. Unlike my dumbass.

"THIS WILL DO."

He lands faster than expected. The shock shacks my insides uncomfortably. I gag trying to keep my stomach from flying out.

"SORRY, DARLING. I'LL ATTEMPT TO BE GENTLER IN THE FUTURE."

He puts me down, my legs buckle like a baby calf's but I manage to stand.

"N-No worries. Just...Just give me a moment."

He chuckles and gets ready to blast off again.

"SO CUTE. NOW LISTEN UP...HOTLAND IS LEVELED OUT IN THREE PARTS. WE WERE ON LEVEL ONE. THIS IS LEVEL TWO. FROM THIS ROOM, MAKE A RIGHT AND CONTINUE ONWARD. YOU'LL NEED TO REACH THE ELEVATOR TO PROCEED. THINK YOU CAN DO THAT?"

I wave at him.

"Go right. Got it. *heavy sigh* Um...Are there more vents?"

He doesn't say anything.

"Metta?"

"TOODLES!"

He blasts off and I roar our swears. Oh well. No point fussing on that. If I'm lucky Flowey will have heard my shouting and come to help me. But this room...The path leading out is glass. The land isn't connected. Flowey would have to dive deeper to find a joining point, most likely it would be too deep and the heat harmful. I need to leave and not look down. I take a step but fumble, grabbing a random signpost to stop the fall.

"Damn it...Is this what jet-lag is?"

The sign's writing makes me curious.

[Art Club: Meet here! Next meeting: October 10th, 8PM]

Huh? Wait...What is the date and time? Argh! I have no sense for time anymore. Toriel has an out-of-date calendar that she refuses to change which doesn't help and the cellphone had the closest thing to a clock yet there's no telling if it was on time.

"Ahhhh!!! I'm late!!! I'm late!!! I'm so sorry!!!"

From seemingly out of nowhere, a doughy butterscotch colored monster in a black fedora and vest comes rushing towards this spot with papers fluttering away from him. He's in such a damn hurry that he trips and ends up crashing, skidding to a stop inches from my feet.

"*grumble* Son of a..."

He picks himself up and quickly grabs what papers he can. He looks odd. I'm getting weird neck-bread vibes off him. It's probably the fedora. Maybe if he took it off and let his brown hair free...What the fuck, am I thinking like a girl? Ewww! Stupid girl thoughts! That's my once per month. No more.

"So stupid! Why am I so clumsy? I hate being such a klutz!"

Poor guy.

"Need some help?"

He flinches. Did...Did he just realize I was here?

"W-Who are you? This is my spot! Get out!"

"Whoa! Chill. No need to be so harsh, kangaroo-boy."

His eyes widen.

"Kangaroo..."

Ah...shit. I know that look by now. My blue soul comes out.

"I'M A BUTTERDRAGON!!"

[WRONG ENEMY !? begins to play in the background.]

...Fuck my life. Wait...What the fuck is a butterdragon?

[You're blocked in angrily!]

"I come here to find something to draw. And what do I find? Some ignorant bitch that wouldn't know a masterpiece if it smacked her in the face!"

Is he referring to himself?

"It's time someone taught you a lesson! Consider it a gift. Let me look in my vest!"

He spins around and swings at me with his tail. It's coated in light blue magic. Fine. I don't move. It turns orange. I jump over it. It turns blue for two more swipes before turns around.

[HP ██████████████████████████████████████████ 40/40]

"Oh! Whoops! That had to hurt! So sorry, I must have..."

He freezes seeing nothing happened to me.

"You...You're fine?"

I shrug. No point opening my mouth. He talks enough for the both of us.

[The enemy looks nervous.]

"Ummm, I...I couldn't find anything I want to give away. *softer* Not that I wanted to give you anything. *normal* Wait, wait! *laugh* I've got my notebook! I can draw you a picture in it! I'm quite the artist, you know. I'll draw you a GREAT picture!!!"

"It's not your turn."

He flinches.

"Oh...Right."

I look at my options.

[FIGHT]

[ACT]

[̴͝SP͜͞E͡L̵͜L͟͠͏]͘͢

[ITEM]

[MERCY]

What even is that button? Eh...I don't need it. Not with this guy.

[ACT selected.]

[New options available.]

[CHECK]

[SOMETHING]

What's with all the weird shit? Just be simple damn it.

[CHECK selected.]

[SO SORRY (REAL NAME, SAMAEL "SAM" D. BUTTERDRAGON) – HP: 1100  ATK: 9 DEF: -6 – This creature is definitely in the wrong time and space!]

Time and space...How the hell does he have negative defense?! That's a thing?!

"My turn!"

My thoughts are broken. He turns around to draw in his notebook, attacking once more with his tail. Blue swish. Orange swish. Blue swish. Blue swish. Orange swish. Orange swish.

[HP ██████████████████████████████████████████ 40/40]

Again he doesn't understand how I got away with no damage. Dude, I can't help that you're attack is obviously telegraphed.

[The enemy looks anxious.]

"S...sorry...The drawing didn't come out very well. Wait! I know the problem! I just have to find a better piece of paper for it!"

"I'm not sure that's how drawing works. But you do you."

[MERCY selected.]

[SPARE selected.]

"I don't want your pity."

Was worth a shot considering the way this fight's going.

"I'll settle on a draw-ing if that's better."

I emphasize the pun with a teasing wink. He gets a little frazzled.

"Uh...Don't do that again. Like...ever."

Screw it. I want to have some fun.

"Why? Are you gonna pun-ish me?"

His right eye twitches.

"Stop it."

"I have an ink-ling this is getting to you. But trust me...You paint seen nothing yet."

Getting frustrated he yanks at his hair before turning around and chucking crumpled balls of paper at me from over his shoulders. Finally, something I need to dodge that will take effort. Each toss has three balls and he does this ten times. The dude's wasting perfectly fine paper. Shameful.

[HP ██████████████████████████████████████████ 40/40]

I'm starting to think he's getting bothered by his inability to hurt me.

[The enemy looks perturbed.]

Called it.

"N-None of my papers are good enough to use..."

[SPARE selected.]

"It's not the tools. They don't create. They are but aids. It's the artist. Their skill and heart. That is key. Anyone can draw. It's as easy as breathing. But if you stress out and push too hard, if you forget to enjoy yourself...Then even what you'd call your masterpiece will never be good enough."

He looks at me funny.

"My advice, Mr. Butterdragon...Don't try to make something as others expect it to be made. Create something as you want it to be. Only then will you be happy with it. I would know. I'm a dabbler at doodling and there's something so...interesting...in being able to take a pencil and transfer an image that you only saw in your head to paper. Though I can never seem to get hands just right."

I look at my hands.

"Weird flesh sticks. Why are you so hard to draw?!"

He thinks for a moment. But then...

"THAT'S IT!!! I know what I can do!! I'll use my magic pencil! It has to be under some of these papers somewhere!!!!"

I take it he's still bent on attacking to prove he can draw. He goes back to tossing paper and by this point, I found a spot to just stand in where nothing falls near, so I wait till he's done.

"Here! I got it! My magic pencil is amazing! Everything I draw with it looks..."

[HP ██████████████████████████████████████████ 40/40]

This fight is so boring. I mean, I'm grateful to not have my ass kicked or beaten within moments of death's door, but...Is he really trying? Froggits try harder than this.

"Why aren't you hurt?!"

I cover my mouth in a yawn.

"Dude, can you let me spare you already? I need to get to level three before Mettaton has a fit."

[SPARE selected.]

He didn't like hearing this.

[The enemy taps his fingers together like jackhammers.]

"I'll show you. I'LL SHOW YOU ALL!! I AM A REAL ARTIST!!"

With pencil in hand, he scribbles into the air and much to my understanding of reality he adds two horned demons doodles to fight on his side.

[DOODLEBOG – HP: 100 ATK: 8 DEF: 999 – Art lets your wildest fantasies come to life!]

"Like I was saying...Anything I draw with this pencil becomes COMPLETELY REAL! But in your case, a little too real!"

I can't help the odd smirk that crawls across my lips.

"Finally..."

I stretch and pop some joints.

"I was starting to fall asleep. Show me what you've been holding back. Let the creativity flow!"

Both Doodlebogs launch eight doodle orbs in circle formations at me. The good news, there's room to move and enough spacing to do some fun maneuvering. The bad news...It's still freaking easy! They shoot this move twice before their turn ends. And still...

[HP ██████████████████████████████████████████ 40/40]

I'm disappointed. And so is he.

"What...How...?!"

[The enemy is confused.]

I shake my head. Seems that's all he's got. Though, to his credit, those drawings need to go. But how do I do that? Hmmm...Maybe...

[ACT selected.]

[New options available.]

[CHECK]

[DRAW]

[SOMETHING]

What's this? Oh...Oh hell yeah.

[DRAW selected.]

"W-Wait...You can't..."

I grab my soul, not sure what else I'm to use, and trace out a large cat that glows like my soul.

"Sketch-kitty, pounce the Doodlebog on the left!"

The cat does as commanded, pouncing at the Doodlebog and they tussle off the side to the heat death below. He panics.

"How dare you use art against me! Don't just stand there, kill her!"

The remaining Doodlebog fires the same attack as before but done three times in rapid secession. I harder move yes, but one that still leaves spots open wiggle on through.

[HP ██████████████████████████████████████████ 40/40]

[The enemy is desperate.]

"H-Hey now...There's no need to do anything crazy. I-I shouldn't have attacked you. That was dumb. W-We good?"

Huh...I don't know if he's being truthful. I try to use MERCY but the button doesn't push in. Something is locking it. I wonder if it's because of the doodle? Is it affecting the battle conditions? To be safe, I'll return things to how they were.

[DRAW selected.]

"You're cheating! You have to be! No one can be this good!"

I roll my eyes while tracing out a massive snake.

"Sketch-snake, put the squeeze to the Doodlebog."

It strikes with the speed of a viper and coils the doodle like a constrictor. The doodle fights back, clawing at the sketch. The sketch knows what its mission is. It throws itself and the doodle over the edge, so now it's only the two of us. He is at a loss what to do.

[The enemy uses a hypnotizing 3D-tush-wiggle attack. Smells... furry.]

I think he's freaked out and out of options. His strongest move, an insane trump card, and I not only countered it but bested it.

[The enemy is apologizing to its visions of the Reaper.]

...What?

"I've messed up. I've really messed up. Oh no. I'm so dead! No...No. I won't let you kill me."

"Dude, I'm clearly not trying to kill you."

"I won't let art die!"

"And you're not listening."

"I'll use this regular pencil! I'll use 100% of best! There is no way you'd kill the maker of such a fine piece!"

He turns around and scribbles furiously. His tail swipes quickly and paper balls fly like crazy. This creates difficulty because trying to dodge the balls is made harder when trying to either stand still for light-blue attacks or move for the orange ones. Orange tail, orange tail, blue tail, blue tail, orange tail, and blue tail. This is how he should've been going at me from the start. It's a good attack.

[HP ███████████████████████████ 27/40]

"Are you ready!? I just finished! Here's your picture!"

He's so proud of it that he doesn't even notice that he finally did damage to me. The picture is a heart.

"What do you think!? It's a representation of your deepest essence... It's great, right!?"

I don't say a word. What did he mean by that? How is a heart my deepest essence? Is it a picture of my soul and souls are the essence of life? How the fuck did he being about so much thought with a heart?! My silence has him become uncomfortable.

"... (They think my art is terrible.) Well! I'll leave you with that thought! Goodbye! See you later! Sayonara! Nice knowing ya! Hasta la vista. ... I should leave."

He attempts to leave but he freezes when I quickly grab his tail.

"Um..."

"That image...You poured your heart into and it shows. It made me think. Art does that. It makes you think and feel. You did that to me. ...10 out of 10."

His eyes widen.

"R-Really?"

I nod and let his tail go...only to get a sappy hug from the butterball.

"Thank you!"

I made his day. He was trying to kill me and is now hugging me over a compliment. I think this is over.

[MERCY selected.]

[SPARE selected.]

[YOU WON!]

[You earned 0 XP and 318 gold.]

Holy shit! I'm rich!

The battle music fades out as he lets me go. My soul returns to me.

"Did you...Did you really like it?"

I nod.

"You gave it your all. That makes it special. Keep that spirit and don't be afraid to try other styles. You'll be amazed at what you can do if you try."

"Like your animals?"

"Animals have always been easy for me. It's people that are my weak-link. Um...Can I see that pencil for a sec?"

He hands me his notebook and normal pencil, to which I make two different drawings. One, a traditional European dragon spouting flame. This is my specialty, I can make these almost with my eyes closed. But the second one is my try at an anime version of myself. I use the eraser a lot on the face, hands, and chest. It never looks right to me once I'm okay with another part of the body. Yet I know I can't spend ages on this so I hand it over when I believe it looks okay.

"See what I mean now?"

"What are you talking about? These are great."

"Exactly..."

He's confused.

"Even when it's good, I still think I suck. But it's that negativity that spurs me to try harder. One day, I shall get those parts down and be happy with it without erasing whole bits out of frustration or doubt in ability. So...yeah...Keep those. Let them help you. Inspire you to be better in spite of others and yourself. Refuse to give up. And never surrender."

He gives me a funny look and I rub the back of my head with a nervous laugh.

"Heh...I have no idea where I was going with that. I tend to ramble when trying to be positive."

A small smile comes to him as he takes a few steps past me.

"I think I get what you're saying. If it's all the same to you...I think I want to be alone with my thoughts for a bit. Might see what ideas come."

I smirk.

"Take care, buddy. May the Muses inspire you to greatness."

I leave the butterdragon to his thoughts and not look down at the glass path that must be crossed. Yet it's doing so that alarms my brain. The land is not solid rock. The land is being supported by thick metal pipes and trussed beams that don't look like they're meant to be used here. I'm conflicted, I feel safe and unease at the same time. It also doesn't help I don't have Flowey with me. I need him. I don't like proceeding without my bro. So...

"Flowey! Bro, I'm up over here! Hurry up!"

Not expecting a response, least of all right away, I aim to head out slowly in hopes that he'll catch up to me before I really need him. But the path actually branches like a 4-way intersection and I get confused. Left is probably back to level one but what's the forward path? I shrug and check it out. Not like I have a killer robot to appease because I'm on TV. Thankfully, it's an empty spot of land. Scratch that. An empty spot of land with some trash on it.

[There's an apron lying on the ground.]

Really? That scrap's an apron?

I inspect the ragged thing and find it's in better shape than it looks.

[Will you take it or leave it?]

This option leads me to believe it's a human item. Probably pairs with this frying pan. Yes, I want it.

[You got the Splattered Apron.]

...Do I wanna equip it? Ugh...I tie the apron around my waist but backwards so it covers my ass.

[You equipped the Splattered Apron.]

[You gain 11 Defense.]

[Are the splotches from food, an enemy, or the former wearer? You don't want to know. Heals 1 HP every other turn.]

Wait...Did it say...?!

[HP: 40 ATK: 45 DEF: 38]

Holy shit! Score!

"So...Does that only work in fights?"

[HP ████████████████████████████ 28/40]

Huh. Guess not. Yet it said every other turn so who knows what that counts as.

I leave to continue all while paying half-attention to my HP. 1 point healing is better than nothing, though it's gonna be a while before I'm healed completely.

It's warm on this level. Still hot but not as bad as level one. Digital cords pulsate with energy from deep down to high above me. And in the distance...a massive mechanical structure. It sits in the lava like a slumbering leviathan. Imposing, mysterious, and giving off the vibes of "STAY THE FUCK AWAY". I better not have to go there.

After a short stroll, I come upon an obstacle or, as monsters put it, a puzzle. There are two conveyor belts, one going forward and the other back towards me. The forward one has three of those thick metal pipes near it and each pipe has a switch. At the end, there's what looks to be a Tesla Coil set up to prevent safe passing. Putting the bits together is easy. I step on the belt and keep walking, flipping the switches as I go. The third flip turns the current off and I can progress.

I regret this.

Literally forty feet away I'm met by those fucking vents. However...beside the vents is a large conveyor belt made of three merged ones. That's moving at the same speed as the one I was just on. Idea time. I dash jump across the belts. Leaping just in case someone somewhere decides to mess with the speed. Lucky me, no dick moves were made and I avoided doing my scarier backup plan of climbing on the support trusses. At least the path is clear now, which is good.

The heat begins to climb as I approach pumping stacks of hot gas. It makes the air thick and hard to breathe. The sooner I get past these things the better. Part of me questions why I don't hoof it on a crawl and then I have to remind that part that the land is inclining upward so it's bloody pointless. My throat is drying out, my lungs burn, and my eyes sting even with the tears trying to soothe the pain. Even the sounds of gears grinding in the background is starting to irritate my senses. But all this just makes me strive forward more to get back to some form of normalcy. Augh...What's my HP at now?

[HP ████████████████████████████████ 32/40]

Not bad. Not bad at all.

"Keep moving, slowpoke."

My blurry eyes spy a white speck among all the orange-brown.

"Bro?"

Something wraps around my wrist and pulls me slowly, leading me like a child helps an elder cross the road. Soon the air is clear and wiping my eyes lets me see Flowey. A very welcoming sight indeed.

"Bro!"

"Good to see you too."

"How did you get up here? The land is broken."

"Not all of it. I pretty much climbed up one high point, crossed over to another, and repeat till I got here. Did you forget how nimble I can be?"

I smack my forehead making him snicker.

"Sometimes it scares me to think how you've managed to not die."

He gets a chuckle out of me.

"Same."

We move on...only to be blocked by two heavily armored guards. One is a rabbit or hare and the other is more of a dragon than butterball was. Adorning fierce, brutal, and intimidating black armor bearing the blood-red Deltarune insignia. On their helms, shoulders, and wrists are jagged threatening spikes. But the real danger that has my attention are the very large swords.

"Are you shitting me?"

"They...aren't supposed to be here."

I look at Flowey funny and he flinches.

"I mean...They don't usually..."

"*mumble* Timeline bullshit. *normal* Fuck it...Yo! Can you two move? We need to reach level three...please?"

I'm sure that saved it from all my attitude.

"Human..."

Nothing good has ever happened to me when someone says "human".

"You're late."

Oh. Well, that's different.

"For...?"

They point their swords at me.

"Your funeral."

"Really? Was that the best you could come up with?"

The rabbit shrugs.

"I thought it was pretty tough."

The dragon punches his arm.

"I told you it was weak."

"It's not like we had a lot of time to come up with something better."

"Right. All the direction Mettaton gave us was 'stall her' while he does stupid crap."

"Let's just get this over with before the Captain finds out."

They rush towards me...then stop. But not a normal stop. They're frozen in place. I look at Flowey, he's stuck in mid-sink into the ground. The hell is going on? It's as if...as if time stopped?

"Sans? Sans, is this you? Where are you?"

White noise, like static on a TV. It pierces my ears as if it were stabbing my very brain. Covering my ears does nothing to stop it. I drop to my knees.

"Sa҉ns͏..̕."

A voice barely solidifies in the sounds assaulting my hearing.

"H͞è's n̢ot he̡r͠e,͟ l͡i̡ttl͡e ͜on̴ę.̨ He ͞can'͏t ̸in̵tęr͜f̛ere҉ w̧i̧th o͝úr̨ f́u͟ņ."

I muster the strength to turn my head and am confronted by a grayed-out monster with a blacked-out face holding a smaller face in its hand. The face looks at me with a small creepy smile. My eyes widen. The face spoke. And it speaks in rhyme. What the fuck?!

"What the hell are you?"

"M̛e? I̕'҉m͠ ͡a ̨f̡o͢l͜l͘ow̵er ̡of̶ ͘the g͠rea͝t Royal͏ ͟Sc͞ien͘t͝i͝st͟,̢ D͜ơc̢tor̕ ̵W̛.D. ̵Gast̀e͞r̀.͘ On̵e day͞,̨ h́e ͝va͝n͞i͡sh̀e͜d͘ w̷itḩou̕t̡ a҉ t́r̶ąc̛e.͝ T̛hey͞ ͠s̡a̢y҉ ̷he ҉s̡hat̕te̶r̷ed ͝ac̛ross̡ ti҉m͠e̴ an͘d̢ ҉s̨pac͘e. Ha H̷a͞.͝..̡ho͠w ̧c̸án I͞ s͠ay̢ s̸o͏ wit͟ho̴u͘t ͘f̶e͟a̸r͘?͝ ̸I'm h̸o͜l͘ding͞ a ̴p̵ie͘ce҉ ͜of̡ h͡im ̶r̶iģht͢ ͢her͞e."

This...This shit right here triggers something primal in me...I get genuinely freaked out. Fleeing like a puppy that just met the big noisy vacuum for the first time. And yeah, this was an overreaction. I've dealt with some insane shit at this point, you'd think I'd be hardened like a soulless speck of dirt. But no. That made me too unsettled and any tough wall I had crumbled. I zoom past the few other frozen in time monsters along the way till I reach the elevator. I spam hit the button, praying it will ignore the fact time is dead and let me in something that I can pretend is safer than out here.

*BING*

A sound other than static? There is a god!

The doors shift open and a grayed-out bird monster with terrible posture along with a grayed-out small humanoid monster stop me in my tracks.

There is no god!

"D͏r.̡ G̴as͝t̶e͠ŕ..͝.͡H̛i͞s brìllia͢n͝cé w͡a҉s̸ ͞irr̷e̶p͞l͞ac͢eabl̨e̶.̷"

"҉W͢hat͏ a̡n ̢áct to ̴foll̕o҉w͟! T́h͘e̷y ̨s͠ay̨ ͏h̶ę c͢r̨eat̛e̴ḑ t͜h͜e͜ ͞C̕O͜R̷E̶."

"Hoẁe͘v͢e̕r, h͜i͏s ͞life҉..͝.̸was ͠c͡u͡t s͘hort."

They say ominously together.

"O͡ne̕ ͟d́a͢y̕,͝ h̵i͟ś ҉ex̵pęri͜m̨e̵ntś w̧ent̡ ̸wr̢on͜g̢, ͡an̡ḑ..̀."

"He̴ fe̸l̢l̡ ̕i͞n̴t͜o ̀hi̵s͡ cr̷eat̀i͢ón̢."

"Węll,̴ ͝w̡e҉ needn̨'͡t͠ gos̕s̕i҉p.̧ A̷f͢t͠e͟r al̵l͏,̷ ҉i̸t'ş ̧rude to ̀tal͡k̨ ab͏o̢u͠t̛ s҉o̵me̢o͘n҉è w̛h͢o̕'s l̷i̕s͢te̡n͢ing.̸"

They grab me and pull me in before my body chooses to run.

"*snarls* Let go you creeps!"

"D̵o̵n't ̕st͠r̴ưg̷gle̵,̧ l͡i͞t̕t̛l҉e o͟n͡e.́"

"̸Yo̷u ͝d͞o͠n͏'t̴ w͡an̸t ̴harm to co͢me̛ to̷ ̡t̀h̢e̵ flo͜wer͞.̡"

Oh fuck...I left Flowey with the creepy face-hand thing. I cease my fighting.

"G҉o͡od͞ ̷ģir̡l."

The doors shut with a quickness.

[SNOWDIN: Skeleton House in present time]

They watch as the human and flower are confronted by the two Royal Guards. And of course, they do as they've been trained. Attack the human. But something weird happens. The guards begin to attack and the screen of the TV glitches into static before the picture returns. Only now the guards have stopped their action and the flower, which was retreating from danger, pops back out in confusion along with everyone else. The human is gone. It happened within the blink of an eye. One second she was there and the next she's not. And now the screen cuts to a "We Are Experiencing Technical Difficulties" image. What is going on?

[HOTLAND: LAB]

Undyne and Alphys are equally as perplexed as everyone else that's tuned in.

"Alphys, where did the human go?"

Undyne irritatedly asks through her teeth. On her end, Alphys is switching through camera feeds like crazy.

"I'm looking! I'm looking!"

The screen swaps from camera to camera and multiple different angles. But there's nothing. Sure, there are monsters. Some just going about their lives. Some slacking around. Even an embarrassing shot of a Pyrope shoving a sandwich into the top of a Vulkin. But no sign of the human on level two.

"Where are you, damn it?!"

"Stop!"

Undyne's shout makes Alphys jump.

"Go back five clicks."

And so she does. The feed is an odd far shot from the gas stacks. It can just barely view the guards let alone the flower who suddenly ducks away. The guards seem even more confused.

"What are we looking for?"

Undyne points at the screen and Alphys sighs.

"If I can't see it on my end, you pointing from a distance does nothing for me!"

Undyne growls.

"Look up, genius!"

Alphys leers at the fish-woman before leering at the view she has on her monitor. Due to the far away placement of the camera, it can see up to the platform of level three. And there, dangling over the side, is a pale white arm that stands out over the red platform and gold LED lights scheme.

"The hell...?"

She switches to the level three cameras.

"Ha! I knew I saw something."

With the better view, they now see the human face-down just a few feet from the elevator.

"How the hell did she get up there?"

Alphys gets out her phone and sends a quick text. When there's no reply she presses a button and a moment later is sent a reply. A few messages are sent as Mettaton zooms on screen.

"What? Why's the tin can there now?"

Undyne is out of the loop as usual.

"Who else do you know can zip over there as fast?"

Mettaton pulls the human to the center of the path, away from a stupid falling to death, and checks over her seemingly lifeless body. Her eyes are open and empty as if someone replaced her peepers with billiards cue balls that glow. Marks on her arms look like bruising but weren't there before nor gained in her earlier fight. Then...Alphys gets a text.

"Hmmm..."

"What's up?"

"Vital signs are still going but her breathing has stopped."

She texts back to Mettaton.

"So...She's dead?"

"No. Not yet at least. According to Mettaton, her HP is full and not depleting. However, if she doesn't start breathing, her HP should drain and she will die."

"Then wha...?"

"Look at the TV, dear."

Undyne looks back at the screen to see Mettaton performing chest compressions in patterns.

"With her heart still pumping it means all other functions are still working. It's likely something happened in whatever event that caused her to get up there to give her trauma. The trauma probably made her brain fail to send the right signals to her lungs and thus, she's in respiratory arrest. So I've instructed Mettaton to force her body to restart her breathing manually with basic CPR."

They watch the robot press into her chest for a good couple of minutes before the human suddenly bolts up violently. Mettaton restrains the hysterical woman as the life returns to her eyes, sight restored settles her down some but she appears terribly shaken.

"Ask him if he can get her to tell him what happened."

"Already sent and awaiting reply."

Mettaton appears to speak with her but she either says very little or nothing at all. She merely holds her self in an attempt to cease her trembling and looks out at what bit of the CORE is still visible from that point.

"Huh...He says she isn't telling. At most, she said it's nothing and it just happens sometimes."

"Super vague and avoiding the subject? That kind of shit ain't normal."

Alphys agrees but it's not like they have the human in custody to interrogate for answers. She sends the text.

"The hell?"

Mettaton offers some concern and encouragement before blasting off, leaving the human alone.

"Why's he leaving her?!"

"He did what was needed. Now the show can continue as planned."

Undyne glares.

"That's twice now. You could've let her die."

"I still need more data. Something odd happened and I need to figure it out."

Undyne huffs softly.

"Fine. You know...You can only string someone along for so long before that string breaks, Alphys."

The lizard-woman chuckles.

"Worried about the human? That's cute."

"I wasn't talking about the human."

Undyne guzzles her remaining ramen and Alphys isn't sure how to respond.

"For your sake, the human better be worth all this effort."

She lifts her bowl.

"More."

[HOTLAND: LEVEL 3 BEFORE GOING LIVE]

Static. Everything is static. Static is all I see and hear. I can't feel anything. Am I dead? Is this what death is? If it is...It's incredibly boring. At least Hell would have a wicked soundtrack to drone out to while being tortured. Suddenly, I feel something. And it hurts. Like something is bouncing on my chest and pauses a bit before doing it again for longer.

Please...Leave me alone...Let me be...I don't want to go back...Don't make me go back...Please...

"*gasps and coughs*"

My lungs burn in this reawakening but my sight is still static. Purgatory. Pain before Heaven. The sins must be suffered away. This must be what's happening. Hands. I feel hands and panic, stress levels at critical. I take a swing at where I think they are.

"D̕͡oņ͟'̕͝t ̨̀͝to͝͏uch̷́͝ ͘me͘͜!̴̵͝"

There's hesitation before more force is used and I'm pinned to what I assume is a floor. I thrash harshly.

"L̸̀e͢a̡͜v̴͟͢e ͘m̵e͞ ͝al҉̀o̷̴n̴̨e̶̢!̡͞ ̡͡Ḑ͞o͝n̶͝'̨̕t ̢͏̡I ͜s̸̛u͜͜f̵͝f̷͠͝er̛ ̧e͏͜n̢o̵u҉͢͢g̶͡͡ḩ?!͏"

"CALM...I...LYNSIE."

A voice? A normal voice?

"DON'T...ME...RELAX."

The struggling I was doing ends. And as I settle down the static that had blinded me subsides. My location is unknown. But I know the one holding me down.

"M-Metta?"

Seeing I'm normal, Mettaton helps me get back on my feet yet I'm unsettled by...things.

"ARE YOU ALRIGHT, DARLING? WHAT HAPPENED?"

Flashes of memory flicker in my head. Those...things...Followers of Gaster...The things they did...

I hold myself and fight the tears trying to come to my eyes. I don't say a thing.

"LYNSIE...HOW DID YOU GET UP HERE? WHY DID I FIND YOU NOT BREATHING?"

I rub my eyes.

"I need my phone. *shaky inhale* I gotta talk to my mom."

"YOU KNOW I DON'T HAVE IT. AND IF I DID, I'M STILL UNSURE YOU WOULDN'T CALL OUT TO YOUR FRIENDS."

He's not wrong. I wasn't going to call Toriel. I was going to give Sans nightmares with the shit done to me.

"NOW COME ON. YOU CAN TELL ME WHAT'S WRONG."

"...N-Nothing's wrong. This...This just happens sometimes."

He's not buying it. I'm doing a piss poor attempt to play off that I'm fine.

"DARLING, YOU'RE OBVIOUSLY NOT FINE AND ABOUT TO CRY. JUST TALK TO ME. WHAT HAPPENED? YOU VANISHED FROM SIGHT AND ENDED UP HERE AT THE START OF LEVEL THREE COMPLETELY UNCONSCIOUS."

I don't say a word.

"DID SOMEONE USE MAGIC ON YOU? IS YOUR SOUL OKAY?"

I flinch at the mentioning of my soul and refuse any further interaction.

"LYNSIE...?"

I refuse to look at him. He sighs.

"IF IT MEANS ANYTHING, DUE TO TIME CRUNCHING, THE THIRD ACT WAS CANCELED. BETWEEN YOUR STALLING FROM HEIGHTS, ALL THESE RANDOM FIGHT ENCOUNTERS, AND EVENTS OF THE FIRST AND SECOND ACT...CHANGES IN THE PROGRAM HAVE BEEN MADE. HEH...ORIGINALLY, THE THIRD ACT WAS GOING TO HAVE YOU DEFUSE A SERIES OF BOMBS PLACED AROUND THE AREA WITHIN A TIME LIMIT. YET EVEN I THOUGHT THAT WAS UNFAIR. THAT AND THE SCRIPT FOR IT WAS JUST AWFUL. NO WAY AM I DISGRACING MYSELF WITH SUCH A POORLY DIRECTED SHOW."

I guess that is some good news. It's probably why he had those guards posted there to stall me.

"BUT...I DO HAVE SOME BAD NEWS."

This gets me to look at him.

"FROM HERE, IN THE NEXT ROOM YOU WILL FIND A SEEMINGLY CHARMING SPIDER NAMED MUFFET. SHE'S A CUNT."

Well, that escalated quickly.

"SHE'S THE LEADER OF THE SPIDERS IN THE UNDERGROUND AND RUNS A SUPPOSED BAKERY. IT'S A FRONT. SHE'S AN EXTORSHINISH. SHE'LL SAY AND DO ANYTHING IF IT MEANS SHE'LL GET GOLD. CLAIMS THE MONEY IS NEEDED TO SAVE THE SPIDERS IN THE RUINS OR SOMETHING STUPID LIKE THAT."

"It sounds like you don't like her very much."

"NO, NOT REALLY. I COULD CARE LESS WHAT SHE DOES. THE THING THAT PISSES ME OFF IS THAT SHE PREYS ON MY WORKERS, KILLS THE ONES THAT CAN'T PAY HER OUTRAGEOUS FEES, AND, WORST OF ALL, SHE REFUSED TO DEAL WITH ME!"

I tilt my head.

"I HAVE TRIED TIME AND TIME AGAIN TO GET HER TO SELL FOOD UNDER MY BRAND. BUT SHE SAYS MY NAME WOULD ACTUALLY MAKE HER LOSE GOLD. SERIOUSLY? THE AUDACITY OF THAT BITCH. I PRACTICALLY OWN HOTLAND AND SHE HAS THE NERVE TO UTTER SUCH SHIT!"

His screen flashes for a moment before he calms down.

"YET DESPITE THAT...KNOWING YOU AND HOW YOU HANDLE DIFFICULT MONSTERS, I'M CONFIDENT YOU CAN GET BY HER WITH LITTLE ISSUE."

"...You have that much faith in me?"

He spins on his wheel.

"WOULD YOU TELL ME WHAT HAPPENED IF I SAY I DO?"

My dower expression answers him for me.

"WELL, IT WAS WORTH A TRY."

His wheel retracts to fly.

"WE WILL MEET AGAIN FOR THE FOURTH ACT...PROVIDED YOU SURVIVE THE SPIDERS. YOU'RE NOT AFRAID OF SPIDERS, ARE YOU?"

"I was when I was a kid. I got over it."

"GOOD. YOU SHOULD BE FINE THEN."

He comes over and, to my surprise, gives me a small embrace.

"I BELIEVE IN YOU, LYNSIE."

My throat tightens, I couldn't speak even if I wanted to. He takes off and I wait for when he's out of sight to breakdown.

[SNOWDIN: Skeleton House in present time]

The "We Are Experiencing Technical Difficulties" screen cuts away. The human has been located. She appears to be on a different level and is a wreck. Down on her hands and knees, sobbing intangible pleas. Something has happened and it wasn't good.

Toriel gasps softly.

"tori? what's wrong?"

She covers her mouth and points. Sans sees it now. Papyrus even spies it before Grillby. The hands. The harsh imprints darkening the snow colored skin.

"Those marks...They would sometimes appear in her sleep. Why are they there now?"

Grillby shoots a look at Sans and he decides to get his buddy off his back.

"she had those marks while with us too. but if you look closely, these marks are different. there's no hole in the palm. plus...there are two sets."

"HMMM...AN AMBUSH PERHAPS? BUT WHAT KIND OF MAGIC CAN ALLOW FOR SUCH A SNEAK ATTACK AND THEN VANISH ELSEWHERE?"

Grillby continues to leer at Sans.

"what?"

"Sounds like teleporting to me. Anyone you know can do that?"

Sans glares.

"no. only i can teleport."

"Are you sure?"

"yeah. i'm sure. knock it off."

Papyrus cocks his brow. This might require his attention if things escalate.

"I'll knock it off when you come clean."

"i ain't hiding shit."

"Bullshit. You've been holding back so much that even your brother doesn't know just how much you do. If you don't know, then you don't know, but if one thing we've figured about you tonight...It's that you hide what you know all the damn time. So you've got to give us something better if you want us to believe you."

Sans balls his fist.

"us? or you? don't start connecting dots to points that don't exist because you want answers that no one can give to make yourself feel better."

"Then tell me who it was that hurt her before. Maybe they know who did it this time."

That line. That line got heads to turn.

"Sans? You know who has been harming my child?"

It's times like these Sans wished he was able to RESET.

"no, i don't."

"That's not what you told me."

"i only said what i did to get you off my back. ya were all upset about the marks and..."

"Of course I was upset about the marks! What guy wouldn't?!"

Papyrus snarkily lifts a finger, admitting his lack of concern but not wanting to get involved in this.

"maybe instead of pointing fingers, you should question why she didn't tell ya about'em herself. because if she doesn't even tell her mom about shit like this, what makes ya think she tells me?"

Grillby had to pause at that.

"Is it that one of them hurt you?"

"What?"

"You're ignoring them, but that doesn't make them invisible to anyone else. Did they do this? Papyrus I can believe, but I have doubts on Sans. But if they did this to you..."

"They didn't. This is a whole different issue."

"Don't defend your abuser."

"I'm not defending shit. It's my problem, I can deal with it. Don't make this a big deal."

"It is a big deal!"

"*wince* You're hurting me."

"..."

"Like I said...That's a different issue that I will deal with. Not you. Are we clear?"

"Y-Yes."

Maybe Sans had a point. Knowing how others would react keeps one from talking about such things, especially when it's not a reaction that is easily dealt with. Toriel and Grillby have proven to overreact when it comes to the human. She probably thought it best to keep such pain to herself to avoid added damage. But still...Something didn't sit right with Grillby. Sans knew something. What it was he knew not.

"IF YOU'RE DONE WITH YOUR POINTLESS BICKERING, THE HUMAN IS ON THE MOVE NOW."

Attention once more fell back to the television.

[HOTLAND: LEVEL 3]

My body aches. The crying did little to ease me. Sure I vented, that's always good. But I don't feel any better for doing so. My arms stings. My soul throbs in agony. My every nerve demands relief that will never seem to come. I look at the bruises. I can still feel their hold. I don't know how long it happened for or how long after till I was found, yet I can still feel their filthy hands. It's too much. Make it stop!

I take my gloves off and dig my nails across the full stretch of my arms. I don't care about bleeding. I just want to stop feeling their hands. The strange energy begins to crackle around me as it did once before.

[HP ████████████████████ 20/40]

It...It finally went away. That's good. Now if only the memory could be removed. Can't claw my brain unfortunately. Oh well. Perhaps I'll find something to bash my head against. Won't that be fun?

I take my leave. Flesh under my now gloved nails and blood trickling down my arms, making a trail behind me.

A few short steps have me in a more inhabited spot. The monsters here give me strange looks. Maybe it's because of the self-mutilation. Or maybe it was spine chilling wailing. Or both. Or random other shit. Either way, I keep to myself and press onward.

"Oh, yoohoo, human~..."

Ah, fuck my life with a thirty-nine and a half foot pole!

"You look like you can use some healing items. Come, I don't bite...well...maybe ONE little nibble~."

...Why do I attract the kinky weirdos?!

This is the spider-lady Mettaton was talking about. She has periwinkle or lavender skin, five eyes, six arms, and two legs. She wears red rompers with yellow buttons in the front, a red ribbon across her chest, as well as large wild twin pigtails in her black hair tied by red bows. She is also holding two teacups with her top pair of hands and two teapots with her middle pair, her bottom pair of hands hide under her little table.

"Welcome to our parlor, dearie~. Interested in some spider pastries? All proceeds go to real spiders~. Check out the webs to make a purchase~."

I'm so not in the mood for this.

"Ms. Spider..."

"No need for formalities, dearie~. Call me Muffet."

"Muffet...I'm gonna be nice yet blunt. So I apologize in advance if I tick you off at any point because that's not my intent. *shaky inhale* I have been battered, beaten, abducted, blasted, and brought near death more than usual today. And normally, I'd roll with it and let you do this 'thing' it is you're gonna do...But not now."

She opens her mouth to speak and I slam my hands on the tabletop.

"I have just spent an ungodly amount of time trapped in that elevator over there having my soul violated by people that don't even exist anymore on this plane of reality. I have clawed my skin off to stop feeling their hands on me. So, please...Not now."

I can feel that energy get stronger. The odd display bugs her yet she continues.

"My, how dreadful. That's a terrible tale you tell, human. And such a silly one to explain your disappearing act."

My eye twitches. Does she...Does she think I made that up?

"That Mettaton is certainly putting more effort into his effects for this show. It's about time too. That metal moron can't act to save his batteries."

I want to hit her.

"Anyway...Can I interest you in some of my 100% all-natural treats? Food made by spiders, for spiders, of spiders!"

...Wait a second?

"Of spiders? So...You're killing your own kind...for pastries?"

She simply smiles innocently.

"...Are they at least dead or dying ones?"

Her giggle is not reassuring.

"Go on, dearie~. Have a nice donut and wash it down with some cider. You'll heal faster than ever before. And all for the low low price of 9999G...each."

My nerves are shot. Were they always called donuts and not doughnuts? What the fuck?!

"Lady, that is the biggest crock of shit I have ever had the misfortune to step in."

All of her eyes glare at me.

"Beg your pardon?"

"This same 'bake sale' is being done by the spiders in the Ruins. Do you wanna know what the prices are there? Donuts are 7G and Ciders are 18G. Where the hell do you get off charging that much for food that works on cannibalism?"

I point at her in judgment.

"You're sick, lady! This is fucked up."

She hisses at me.

"Seems humans are awfully stingy with money. Don't know a good deal when it's in their face."

I look at her cockeyed.

"Stingy with money? Bitch, did you not hear the words coming out of my mouth?!"

She laughs in my face.

"Ahuhuhuhu...You think your taste is too refined for our pastries, don't you, deary?"

"...Sure. Whatever. You're not listening anyway."

"Ahuhuhu...I disagree with that notion. I think your taste...Is exactly what this next batch needs!"

She stares at me creepily and licks her lips.

"Oh hell nah!"

I flip the table on her and run. She's not happy.

"Get back here!"

"Fuck you!"

I look back to see if she's following and crash into a guy.

"Hey, watch where you're going."

"Sorry. I was just..."

My blood runs cold seeing the monster I've bumped. This guy...This guy is a dead ringer for the creepy gray dude with the face in his hand. The only difference being he's in color.

"*scoff* Weirdo."

He walks to where Muffet is but I can't move. My heart begins pounding. Flashes of memory play before my eyes. I can't breathe fast enough. Gaster, for all the shit he does, isn't as bad as the Followers.

MAKE IT STOP! M̴A͝KÉ IT͜ S͢T͡O͜P!!͘ MA̡̛͜K̶͢E͝ ̢I̡͝T̡҉̧ ́͠S̷͡T͝OP̵!!̛͏! M̢̡A̸̧̛͞͝K̢̨҉É̶̡̢͏ ͜͝͡I̸̧̨̕T̴ ̶̕͞S͜͢T̵͡Ǫ͝҉҉҉P̨̛͞!̶!̕͘͟!̷̨͟͝͡!̕͟

[WARNING]

[SOUL destabilization detected]

[HEARTBREAK immanent]

W͏ai̕t̸.̀.̢.̸Wha̧t doe̴s̛ t̨ha͝t ̨meàn̶?͡

[HEARTBREAK is the condition in which the SOUL will damage itself due to instability or loss of HOPE]

[There are three levels of the HEARTBREAK condition]

[Level ONE: the SOUL forms a crack, it starts small which can be healed easily]

[Level TWO: the crack on the SOUL spreads, damage taken is increased and needs intensive care to be repaired]

[Level THREE: the SOUL shatters and death accrues]

...Serious?

[Current status: PENDING HEARTBREAK]

[PENDING HEARTBREAK: the SOUL weakens and its color dulls]

[Most MONSTERS in the UNDERGROUND have this state due to a loss of HOPE which is the main trait in MONSTER SOULS]

So...I can die from my soul hurting itself because of my inability to cope with the shit that happened?

[Correct]

...Fuck. Well...I should make a last will. Because I'm gonna die.

*STATIC* DARLING? ARE YOU OKAY? YOU NEED TO KEEP MOVING.

Mettaton's voice in my ear causes the shackles of trauma to release me...for now.

I slap myself. Gotta focus. Do this and get to go home. Concentrate. Don't fuck up! The energy around me slowly dissipates.

"Human!"

Looking back I see Muffet coming at me.

"Someone's stealing from the register!"

Her concern for money outweighs her need to kill me and I use this to escape. Much to my annoyance, this part of the path ends with more of those damn vents and they of course split off into three ways, one being a big as hell closed door.

"...I fucking hate Hotland."

I sigh. Taking in the vent platforms and noting that the gap between them is the smallest size ever. No need to run, jump, or use them. I merely walk onto the next platform and can do so for all of them. I choose to take the right side first. Why not? Not like it makes a difference. It leads me to a conveyor belt that has three blue lasers. I ride it to the end without harm. I guess Metta's budget for puzzles is running low if this is what I have to deal with. This leads me to a familiar room with, what a surprise, the same shooting puzzle from the last time I had to unlock a big fucking door.

"Now this is just lazy."

I look for the instructions.

(Shoot the opposing ship!)

(You have just one shot.)

Well...Maybe that's something.

This puzzle has the blocks in a four by five state. Eleven blocks are solid and four can be moved around. The four moving blocks move all at once like they're connected. The open spaces are pretty fair if I have to give it some credit. I move to the right, up, right, down twice, right twice, down, left, down, and finally end it by firing through the clear path.

(CONGRATULATIONS!)

"Don't tell me it's the same on the other side."

I head out and take the other conveyor belt back to the vents, passing a random cactus in the process. I swear if this shit keeps up I'm going to lose my mind. No! No...I need to calm down and relax. I don't need the stress. My soul is in rough shape as is. Now it's at risk of damage without my conscious input. I wish I had my music. That would really help. Maybe a little Green Day or Linkin Park. Oh! My Chemical Romance!

*BONK*

It would seem I didn't pay attention and walked into the puzzle room, kicking the machine by accident.

(Shoot the opposing ship!)

(You have just one shot.)

"God dingle damn it bull honkery."

I hate copy & paste design. The board is larger, five by five. Ten solid blocks and six movable ones, everything else is empty space. Right, up, right, down twice, right, right/up, up/right, up twice, right, up, and fire.

(CONGRATULATIONS!)

"...I'm so sick of this crap it ain't even funny."

I shove my hands in my pockets and leave...only to see two diamond-headed monsters just hanging out, one light-purple and the other a super light-green. Did I really walk by them?

"I've been thinking about getting a sick skateboard."

"Really? That's cool I guess. ...So...What's your fave Mettaton Moment(TM)?"

"My fave Mettaton Moment(TM)? Right when everything looks the baddest, he poses dramatically. Like when he's on a cooking show and the eggs don't turn out right. But! Then he says...Even if you suck at cooking, you can always buy an MTT-brand Glamburger! Then he eats one! Everyone loves it!"

"...How does he eat it without a mouth?"

"Uhhh...well...Watch the show!"

"Well, my fave Mettaton Moment(TM) is when he beats up the heel-turning villains! Even if it's during what's supposed to be a quiz show. Oh! And I like when he tries on all kinds of different fashionable outfits! Even if it's during what's supposed to be a newscast."

I wonder if I can get a chuckle out of these two.

"Sounds like you two really know your stuff about Mettaton."

They turn to look at me, they look like teenagers based on their clothes.

"Totally."

"No one's a bigger fan than us."

"Oh yeah?"

"Yeah! He's currently broadcasting live. And with a Human! We can finally get to the surface!"

"On the surface, we'll be able to watch all kinds of TV...But, I bet none of those shows are as good as Mettaton's!"

"You don't say. Then...Could you describe this human? I don't want to miss seeing it."

The green one goes for his phone.

"Let me see if it's back on and we'll show you. Some crazy stuff happened and the feed cut off a bit ago."

I smile and wait for it. I can't read their faces, but it's very clear when the green one goes to his buddy and shows him the screen. Looks are shot at me. I merely give a friendly wave.

"Dude..."

"We're on TV!"

At least someone's happy about it.

"Wait...Then that means..."

"You're the human?"

I shrug.

"What...What happened to you?"

"You're like all messed up and junk."

I shrug again.

"You know...Messed up crud. Being human ain't all that and or fun. But don't worry about it. Just enjoy the show. Metta's doing his best to make it epic as hell."

I walk past them.

"Oh! Before I go...Don't copy any of the stuff aired at home. You'd probably get in trouble if you blast people for getting trivia wrong or use chainsaws while cooking."

I give a thumbs-up as I go. Vaguely hoping to look badass. With the door open it shouldn't be long till all this nonsense is over and I can go home. I wonder though...Can Flowey get up here? The floor is artificial, so I don't know if he can traverse it. I hope he's okay. Poor fella's probably losing his mind wondering where I went. Then again, he's a clever cookie and knows his way around the Underground better than anyone.

[The smell of cobwebs fills the air...]

Huh?

*sniff*

"What smells like freshly baked tarantulas?"

...Oh shit.

The room past the door is littered with webbing and spiders are dangling from the ceiling.

"...Fuck my life."

Smelling a trap I attempt to get through this room as fast as I can. But the webbing on the floor accumulates on my shoes and eventually, I'm unable to take a step. Struggling only made things worse.

"Ahuhuhuhu..."

Damn it! Damn it all to hell!!

"Did you hear what they just said? They said a human in tacky clothes will come through."

"Well, fuck you too."

"I heard that they hate spiders."

"What?!"

"I heard that they love to stomp on them."

"That is a bald-faced lie!"

"I heard that they like to tear their legs off."

"Slander! The levels of bullshit in here are off the charts!"

"I heard..."

Muffet comes down like a Charlotte's Web reject onto a large web. Smaller spiders dangle beside her and block the path ahead as well as behind me.

"...that they're incredibly stingy with their money. Ahuhuhuhu."

My fucks are all gone.

"You're mom was a hoe and ate your dad."

Her face blanks before burning with rage.

"You're fucking dead meat!"

[SPIDER DANCE begins to play in the background.]

My dull yellow soul comes out.

[Muffet traps you!]

"Oh, like this is fair. I can't move and you bring out a freaking gang. I mean, what are the damn rule anymore?!"

"Oh don't look so blue, my deary~."

She spins silk to entangle my soul then bites the end of a strand, her magic venom flows down the strand and coats the heart. Forcibly changing the trait and color.

"...I think purple is a better look on you! Ahuhuhu~."

This feels so wrong.

"Why is everyone messing with my soul today?!"

Her spider underlings draw webbing in strings in horizontal lines. These lines are also infused with the purple magic and attract my soul.

[You're trapped in a strange purple web!]

"Here's the deal, dearie~...A spider will appear to the right between each turn, holding a sign that presents the density and type of attack that will come after your turn. Now while you can't move, your pretty little soul can, and you'll have to move it along or switch between the three strings to avoid attacks. There will only be three strings. No more, no less. How's that for fair~?"

I mull it over.

"...Not bad actually. Who goes first?"

"You. I want to see what you can do."

She's a smart one, I'll give her that. Let's see my options.

[FIGHT]

[ACT]

[̴͝SP͜͞E͡L̵͜L͟͠͏]͘͢

[ITEM]

[MERCY]

That button is giving me weird vibes the more I see it.

[ACT selected.]

[New options available.]

[CHECK]

[STRUGGLE]

[PAY 10G]

Pay? Fuck that! I earned this gold. Mine!

[CHECK selected.]

[MUFFET – HP: 1250 ATK: 38.8 DEF: 18.8 – If she invites you to her parlor, excuse yourself.]

And she's better in the stat department than the butterdragon.

A spider drops down and holds a sign...It's a picture of a spider. The hell does that mean?

"Why so pale? You should be proud~."

"With the amount of blood I've lost today it would make me look like a corpse. But be proud of what?"

"Why...Proud that you're going to make a delicious cake~! Ahuhuhu~!"

Spiders begin crawling across the threads. It's like a weird form of Frogger minus hopping to safety. It's a simple move and I come out of it fine.

[HP ██████████████████████████████████████████ 40/40]

Sweet, my HP is full. I love this nasty apron!

[All the spiders clap along to the music.]

It is a catchy tune, no lie. But I need to get out of this. It's not like all of me is unable to move.

[ACT selected.]

[STRUGGLE selected.]

[You struggle to escape the web. Muffet covers her mouth and giggles at you.]

...Bitch.

A spider drops down and holds a sign...It's a picture of a spider. Okay, I know what that means now.

"Look at you. Trying to break free. It's so cute~."

"Would it help if I asked nicely? Please let me go?"

"Let you go? Don't be silly~. Your SOUL is going to make every spider very happy~~!"

Spiders cross the lines and it oddly seems like there was less this time. Making it easier.

[HP ██████████████████████████████████████████ 40/40]

[Muffet does a synchronized dance with the other spiders.]

"You know...Someone warned us about you...Offered us a LOT of money for your SOUL."

This gets my attention.

"What?"

"Oh yes~. They had such a sweet smile~ and...Ahuhuhu~. It's strange, but I swore I saw them in the shadows...Changing shape...?"

The hell? Wait...She can't mean one of the Followers...Can she? Stop it! Don't think about them! Don't!

"Oh well. It's not like it matters anyway. Your move, dearie~."

[STRUGGLE selected.]

[You struggle to escape the web. Muffet laughs and claps her hands.]

"Still trying, huh? Still thing. Don't you know spider silk is five times stronger than steel?"

I can not get a break today.

A spider drops down and holds a sign...It's a picture of two spiders. What?

Double the spiders come on the strings at the same time. It's somehow a new move yet works too similar to the normal attack to be tricky. I dodge it fairly well.

[HP ██████████████████████████████████████████ 40/40]

[Muffet pours herself a cup of spiders.]

...I didn't need to see that. No one needs to see a large spider drink smaller spiders like they were tea.

"*sip* With the money from you SOUL, the spider clans can finally be reunited~."

I tilt my head.

"What do you mean?"

"You haven't heard? Spiders have been trapped in the RUINS for generations!"

Obvious thing is obvious.

"Can't they, you know, squeeze out through the door?"

"*scoff* Even if they go under the door, Snowdin's fatal cold is impassable alone."

It is pretty cold there. Then they'd have to travel through two zones to get here. Damn, that sucks.

"But with the money from your SOUL, we'll be able to rent them a heated limo~. And with all of the leftovers...? We could have a nice vacation~! Or even build a spider baseball field~!"

What little sympathy I was gaining dies at that.

"Now you're just spending to show off."

"But enough of that...It's time for dinner, isn't it? Ahuhuhu~."

*Growls*

I look around and see nothing. I don't like this.

[STRUGGLE selected.]

[You struggle to escape the web. Nothing happened.]

"Don't struggle too much. You'll make yourself all sweaty. No one wants a sweaty donut."

A spider drops down and holds a sign...It's a picture of a spider and a donut?

The spiders come crawling faster than before even if their numbers aren't as much, then they are followed by random donuts being thrown by the spiders blocking the pathways. This almost had me. Came close, but no cigar.

[HP ██████████████████████████████████████████ 40/40]

I'm proud of my dodging skills. I've come a long way.

[Muffet tidies up the web around you.]

If you don't like crumbs, don't throw food. It's very simple.

*Growls*

There's that sound again. I really don't like it. Muffet does though.

"You look concerned."

"Are you saying you don't hear the growling?"

She giggles.

"Oh, how rude of me! I almost forgot to introduce you to my pet~."

I'm puzzled. What kind of pet does a spider have?

"Oh, my pet~...Looks like it's time for dessert~."

I can hear rapid heavy skittering. Not good! Not good!

[STRUGGLE selected.]

[You struggle to escape the web. Muffet is so amused by your antics that she gives you a discount!]

"Tell you what...If you survive my pet, I just might consider sparing you."

"R-Really? That might actually be the f...Holy fucking shit!!"

*Roar*

An abomination appears. A hideous cupcake spider thing emerges from the webs.

"What the fuck is that thing?!"

"This is my pet. Have fun, you two~."

A spider drops down and holds a sign...It's a picture of a cupcake. I don't like this at all!

So many spiders speed by in an unchanging pattern of fear and with good reason. The freaky food beast climbs down and begins eating the strings, pulling my soul towards its hungry maw. This causes spiders that were already on their way to fall prey to this creature as I desperately do my best to not get hit or be dragged to what I assume is instant death. But I'm too panicked to be perfect in my dodging.

[HP ████ 4/40]

Six...I took six hits. I'm gonna die.

[Your soul can't take much more of this.]

No? Really?! Like I couldn't fucking tell!

"You're still alive? Ahuhuhu~...That's impressive~."

She calls her pet to her side.

"Got way too worked up...*gag* I think...*gag* I think I'm gonna puke. *hic*"

"...Please don't. Do you know how hard vomit is to clean out of webbing?"

I take a moment to settle down.

"*sigh* Don't lie...Spiders eat their webbing when it gets messed up."

She cringes.

"Yeah...I don't know everything about spiders. But I do know random gross stuff like that."

I shake off the impending dizziness.

"So...Are you going to spare me?"

She thinks for a moment.

"I will..."

Maybe there is a god?

"For the small fee of 500G~."

Nope. God's dead.

"Are you kidding me?! I'm fucking broke! "

I ain't telling her I have money.

"Then I guess we're going to be spending more quality time together, dearie~ I do hope you're feeling comfortable trapped in that web. Ahuhuhuhu~! Because I don't mind keeping you here for as long as it takes~!"

Damn it. I don't have time for this crap. Wait a second...Time? Heh...This gives me an idea.

"Say, Muffet...Who's watching your bake sale stand while you're here?"

She folds her upper arms.

"A loyal family member. Why do you ask?"

I chuckle softly.

"Oh, no reason. Just checking."

Her eyes cock.

"Checking?"

"Well, we've been here a long time. At least, you have because you got here before me. And we're far from your stand too. It would be a real shame if someone took your 'donations' while this fight was happening."

She sneers.

"Dearie, you're not going to fool me again with that trick. No one would dare steal from me."

I smirk.

"That's the thing...It's not YOU they'd stealing from now is it? It's some other weaker spider."

Her expression gains some worry.

"Even if that spider is loyal, can you honestly say it can defend the money if, let's say, a group stormed the table?"

Concern crosses her face and her pet nudges her as it picks up the vibes.

"Then...Then I'll kill you quickly and return before some fool even tries!"

I shake my head at her.

"Yeah, that would be a thing you could do. But...You can't."

"Wha...What do you mean I can't? You have four HP left! One more hit and your SOUL is mine!"

I put my hands in my pockets and rock on my heels.

"True. So very true. Yet...It's not your turn."

Her eyes widen, finally picking up on my little plan.

"Here's the thing...I've been in enough fights to understand how they work. It all functions on a turn-based system. It's a very fair means of doing combat. No one can attack at random, only when it's their turn. Heh...But the kicker is, and I think you know where I'm going with this...There's no time limit on turns. So if I want to...as long as I don't do anything...my turn will never end. And we'll be stuck here, locked like this...forever!"

Now it's her turn to feel panic.

"You're bluffing."

I grin.

"How much are you willing to bet on that? Because I wager your clan won't take losing all their hard-earned gold due to your negligence very well. They may think a new leader is needed if that happens."

I yawn and stretch to get cozy, showing I'm more than willing to stay put. She twitches with nervousness.

"So tell us, Muffet...What's it gonna be?"

Based on my understanding of Muffet, she's a greedy, stingy, intimidating, malicious, and somehow hypocritical monster, although having a courteous and sweet way of speaking. She won't stay. The odds don't favor her.

Her pet looks at her, the spiders turn to her, the pressure is almost visible as it smothers her. She balls her six fists and stomps her foot in a fit.

"Fine! I'll SPARE you!"

"For free?"

She grinds her teeth.

"Yes, for free! Just quit stalling and confirm it!"

[Muffet is sparing you and refuses your money.]

I can be super evil when I have the chance.

[MERCY selected.]

[SPARE selected.]

[YOU WON!]

[You earned 0 XP and 0 gold.]

The webbing around my soul dissolves. As does the stuff around my feet. My soul turns a dull orange and returns to my body.

"There, you're free. Now get lost!"

"I'm glad we could have such a fun time together, dear."

She snarls and hops onto her pet.

"Next time, you won't get away so easily."

"And maybe next time you'll be paying me for my amazing entertainment skills."

I think channeled Mettaton for a moment. She bites back some harsh unladylike remarks and rides off. I look at the spiders that block my way out.

"Move...please."

They're hesitant but do so.

"Thank you."

I take a few steps but stop near them, pulling out a small handful of gold.

"I don't know if what she said was true, but...here."

I put the gold on the ground and take my leave, pulling a bottle of cider from my inventory to heal.

"Consider it an addition to the amount I've already paid in the Ruins."

The spiders are confused but I hear them take the gold. I can be evil, yes. But it's not true to my nature. I drink the whole bottle as I enter a new, hopefully lacking in spiders, area.

[HP ████████████████████████████ 28/40]

Not bad. I'll fully heal up soon. This new area appears to have the same material as the Ruins. I'm getting homesick. I miss Toriel. I miss Flowey. I miss my bed. I want to go home.

My melancholy blinds me to my current surroundings. I only come out of it once a spotlight hits me.

"The hell...?"

Things look funny. No doubt it's a setup by Mettaton. But I'm unsure what this act is. I mean, it looks like a receptionist's waiting room. A desk and some random chairs.

"GOOD EVENING, LADIES AND GENTS...!"

Mettaton zips in wearing a red suit and shoves me in a chair as he takes center stage.

"FIRST AND FOREMOST, WE HERE AT MTTTV WOULD LIKE TO APOLOGIZE FOR THE LACK OF ME OVER THE COURSE OF THE PROGRAM. DUE TO THE LACK PREP WORK WITH MY COSTAR HERE, WE SADLY HAD TO FORGO A THRILLING ACT BACK IN LEVEL TWO INVOLVING HUNDREDS OF EXPLOSIVES!!"

I so freaking called it. I should let him have his moment...Nah!

"I thought you said that act was shit anyway?"

He extends an arm to cover my mouth.

"FORGIVE HER. SHE'S LOST A LOT OF BLOOD AND NOT ALL THERE MENTALLY."

I leer at him flatly.

"BUT...DARLING HERE IS GOING TO MAKE AMENDS WITH US ALL RIGHT NOW. IT'S TIME TO ANSWER SOME BURNING QUESTIONS."

I'm so confused as he lets go and leaps onto the desk, posing dramatically.

"IT'S TIME FOR..."

A large neon sign shaped like him drops from the ceiling.

"BURNING THE MIDNIGHT OIL WITH A KILLER ROBOT! THE LATE NIGHT TALK SHOW HOSTED BY YOURS TRULY."

Huh. Not a bad title.

"I thought you were working on a courtroom trial program?"

He scoots to now sit behind the desk.

"UNFORTUNATELY, WHILE I DO HAVE THE FUNDS, I DON'T HAVE AVAILABLE WORKERS TO MAKE SUCH A SET. SO...WE'RE DOING THIS INSTEAD."

"Heh...Must be hard to meet your expectations."

"DARLING, YOU HAVE NO IDEA."

A tense dramatic score plays.

"SO, DARLING...ARE YOU READY TO TELL ME EVERYTHING?"

Ah. I see now. Fine, Metta, have it your way. Just be careful what you wish for. You may not like it. Now don't get me wrong. I know my limits. I'm not about to tell him EVERYTHING. I'm not that stupid. But if he wants truth, he's going to get a version that's missing some characters and other junk.

"As you wish. You wanna know the truth? You want to scar the entire Underground? Sure. Why not. What else do I have to lose at this point since you exposed me? So congratulations! I hope you like the prize you've been longing to get. Because I sure as hell don't."

Let the show commence.

[marinaaniseed]

Get innocuous!

Song: Get innocuous! from the album Sound of silver by LCD Soundsystem.

Summary: After the events of Death on the stairs, Steve cheers you up by doodling on your cast.

Pairing: Female reader x Stucky

Length: 1,497 words

A/N: Apparently people wanted a sequel to Death on the stairs, so here it is. Injury, Stucky, poly relationships, bisexuals EVERYWHERE. See here for what this is all about.

***

Steve had been sent to follow up on a lead while you were still in surgery. He’d wanted to stay, to be there when you came to, but Wanda and Bucky would be there, so he’d headed off again with Thor, Clint, and Nat.

By the time he’d returned, you’d been moved to the relative comfort of your room. Bucky had been keeping Steve informed about how you were doing. Those not on missions were doing their best to care for you, keep you entertained and your spirits up.

Bucky brought you breakfast in bed before Wanda helped you wash and dress. They wheeled you around to meetings, social events, everything and anything they could do to help you feel included. Tony was tinkering with various gadgets to try to make your life easier while you healed. Peter had brought some of his Lego to build with you, a space thing from a film that Steve hadn’t seen.

He knew you were being looked after but he still felt bad for not being there. It was incredibly brave, what you’d done. The situation in the tower block would’ve been much worse if you hadn’t warned him and Wanda before the fighting started. How had he even slept through the gang gathering outside your door? His hearing was enhanced, just like Bucky’s. He should’ve heard them, been able to do something. In a way, your injury was his fault.

Even with your bedroom door shut, Steve could hear the sound of you crying and it broke his heart, adding another thick layer to his already guilty conscience. He knocked gently, and when he got no reply, he entered gingerly.

Alone and prone in the half-light. Your body trembled as you sobbed, used tissues on the floor evidence of how long you’d been crying.

“Hey,” he announced. There was no point in asking if you were alright, he already knew the answer to that.

“Whuh?” you queried, raising your head to look in Steve’s direction. Your eyes were blurry and bloodshot, nose equally red from blowing it.

“It’s ok, it’s just me,” he soothed, shutting the door with a gentle click. He handed you a fresh tissue, before sitting on the end of the bed.

You wiped your face and turned over, so you could face Steve.

“Aw, fuck’s sake,” you whined, rubbing your eyes with the heels of your hands. “I didn’t want anyone to see me like this.

“Stop rubbing your eyes,” he said, leaning forward to softly but firmly grab your wrists and pull them away from your face. “You’ll make them sore.”

You looked at him for a minute. If it wasn’t for Bucky’s stories, you’d think Steve was a man who’d never cried in his life, but you knew that beneath the all-American hero facade there was also a sensitive, creative man. You’d never seen his art, but Bucky had assured it was good, and not just because he was biased.

Or bi-assed, even.

That thought made you laugh aloud, startling Steve.

“Sorry, I just remembered something funny,” you said. Steve didn’t need to know what it was, he was just glad to see you smiling again.

“Do you want to talk about what made you cry?” he asked after a moment.

“It’s just really disheartening to be stuck here like this,” you told him, gesturing to your foot, where it sat elevated on some pillows. “Everyone is looking after me but I feel like I’m a burden to the team when they could be, should be doing other things.”

“No, you’re not a burden,” Steve noted. “I’m sorry I couldn’t be here before, but Bucky was sending me updates. He really cares about you, we all do.”

“It was such a stupid thing to do, I could’ve died.”

“But you didn’t. Sometimes, we all have to take risks. Think how much worse it would’ve been if you’d stayed up there with no weapon or protection.”

They’d have shot you without hesitation, a broken ankle seemed a small price to pay in comparison.

“I guess,” you told Steve with a shrug.

“What you did was really brave. You gave us a few seconds more warning than we would’ve had. We’re all so proud of you. Here,” he said, opening up something on his phone and it to you. “I probably shouldn’t be showing this to you, but Buck’s such a softie.”

Looking at the screen, you could see it was a thread of messages between Steve and Bucky. Or, more accurately, several messages from Bucky and the occasional one from Steve.

Y/N’s such an amazing and strong lady! Her dedication is immense and I am super proud of her! Without the serum to help me heal, I don’t know if I could’ve done what she did.

Here’s our girl wheeling herself around - so proud and happy! Docs are really pleased Y/N’s healing so well, so proud of her progress.

She makes me so proud, every day. She is so much stronger than I ever could be. We are so blessed to have her in our family.

“Steve, you’re gonna make me cry again,” you said, handing the phone back to him.

“I know Buck’s not the only one who’s proud of you. This is just a temporary break… sorry, poor choice of words, but you know what I mean. You’ll be out in the field with us again in no time.”

“But what if I’m not?”

“There’s always a space for you on our team,” Steve reassured you.

It was hard to imagine being out there again. Just being able to walk was still weeks away, if not months. Even if you did fully recover, would you just freeze when the moment came to make a decision?

“I’m scared,” you admitted.

“That’s perfectly understandable.”

“Not just about my recovery or my career,” you clarified, “but about what dating Bucky might mean.”

“Ah,” said Steve. “You have my blessing, I’m sure he’s told you that.”

“I know, I just wouldn’t want you to feel left out.”

“I don’t have to be.”

Did Steve just suggest what you think he did?

“Pardon?” you asked.

“I don’t have to be left out. If you wanted, I’d be happy to join in. Or date you separately. Very happy, but only if it was something you wanted too.”

“Did they… did they change my meds again? Up my dosage?”

“No,” Steve chuckled. “I’m serious. Although, I’m sure you can understand there’d be a need for a certain level of discretion, especially in public.”

You nodded mutely, too stunned to say anything. It was new territory for Steve, too, but he shared everything else in his life with Bucky, why not you as well?

Glancing down at your cast, he was surprised to realise your cast was completely bare.

“It’s not my usual medium, but would you like me to grab a pen and make this leg as beautiful as your other one?” he suggested.

“Sure,” you smiled at him.

You and Steve always date the same people? You sent Bucky a quick message while Steve went back to his room.

No, only the ones with broken limbs - especially if they’re pretty, came the reply.

Shit, better hope Wanda doesn’t break a wrist or something.

I think you’re safe, doll. She doesn’t seem to like her men completely human.

And you two are? You’re old enough to be my great-grandfathers.

Hey! Play nice or I’ll steal your wheelchair ;-)

Steve burst in, brandishing a gold Sharpie.

“I think that’s why nobody’s doodled on it, they don’t have a pen that’ll show up on such a dark cast,” he commented. “Anything you want me to?”

“I’ll leave it to your judgment.”

*** It took Steve several hours, you had to keep turning over for him, but eventually, he finished it. He’d drawn anthropomorphic versions of the team, with gaps filled with intricate flowers and patterns. There was a replica of the Captain America monkey doodle he kept on his desk. Sam and Clint had become a falcon and hawk, fighting over crumbs being thrown on the ground by spider versions of Nat and Peter. Tony had become Tony Stork, carrying Vision, there was Goose Banner in his lab, Thor was a hammerhead shark with Mjölnir between his teeth… there were so many wonderful little doodles all over your leg, but your personal favourite was Bucky as a cute little bear, holding a heart with yours, his, and Steve’s initials on it.

“Let me send him a photo,” Steve said with a smirk.

It didn’t take long until you heard Bucky thundering along the corridor, bursting into your room with such force that the door bounced back off the wall.

“Listen here, you punk,” he shouted, pointing a vibranium finger at Steve, “I am not a cute little bear.”

“That’s not what the guy at that club in Berlin said,” Steve answered, trying not to laugh.

This was going to be fun.

[calligraphist-artemisia]

Quid Pro Quo

Summary: While everyone's healing after their first fight against Haggar's super powered Mech, Coran brings up the perfect way for them to relax and pass the time: a fun game of Monsters & Mana! While Shiro argues the value of (once again) playing a paladin, Keith goes for a more unexpected role.

Also posted on Archive of our Own - under the username Kishirokitsune

-

Quid Pro Quo

Quid pro quo - a favor or advantage granted or expected in return for something.

The aftermath of their battle against the Komar Mech found the paladins of Voltron in a rough state. While the lions protected them from harm to the best of their ability, there were still injuries and each of them had spent two long weeks confined to their beds in the med-bay so they would have proper time to heal from their ordeal. And even after that, they were released under the condition that they take it easy for another week.

After being active for so long, it was hard for any of them to patiently sit around and do nothing, especially when there was so much that needed done.

It was Coran who came up with a solution to their boredom.

He rounded up everyone and giddily took them down to the common room, where he had commandeered a round table for their use. There was a hand-drawn, gridded map spread across the surface, a handful of dice, and a set of five familiar figures.

“You save the game pieces?” Lance asked, sounding delighted. He swooped in and picked up the model of Pike, cradling it in his hands.

Allura smiled as she stepped up next to him, reaching for Valayun. “This is brilliant, Coran! But are you sure you have time for this? You and Shiro are perfectly able to go out and help with reconstruction.”

“Sam said that if he sees me working for the next twenty-four hours he's going to tie me down and make sure I get some rest,” Shiro said. “This sounds like the better choice.”

Pidge snorted in amusement, but didn't comment on it. She looked delighted to hold her figure of Meklavar once again.

Only Hunk looked a little concern, though it was quickly revealed that it wasn't over the game itself. “But Keith didn't play with us last time and he doesn't have a model.”

Coran twirled his mustache, a twinkle in his blue eyes. “Don't you worry about that, my young friend! I found a machine here that prints models in 3D and have already made new ones for our adventure today. They will all be revealed when the time is right. Now sit! And we shall resume our journey through the magical realm of Aurita!”

It didn't take them too long to get settled in around the table. Coran chose a spot at the top of the map, with Keith and Shiro to his left and right. Pidge was on the other side of Keith, followed by Hunk, then Lance, and finally Allura, bringing the circle back to Shiro. Each of them picked up a game pad and found their character, reviewing theirs stats and refreshing their memory of how the game worked.

“Before we begin, does anyone want to create a new character?” Coran asked, looking pointedly at Shiro.

Shiro crossed his arms over his chest. “I'm happy playing as Gyro. I don't see what I'd want to change characters.”

The other paladins – minus Keith – groaned in exasperation.

Coran hummed as he booted up his game pad. “I thought you might want a backup in case anything...unfortunate should happen?”

There was a moment of silence in which Keith looked up from his game pad to raise an eyebrow. When no one chose to elaborate on that, he went back to creating his own character, wondering what he'd gotten himself into.

“Coran, is something going to happen to Gyro?” Shiro asked.

“Only the dice know,” Coran replied mysteriously.

Shiro sighed as he selected the character creation screen. “I don't understand what you have against me playing as a paladin. I like being a paladin.”

“Can we make a rule that he can't make another one?” Lance asked.

“Now, now, far be it for me to stymie Shiro's creativity. If he wants to rewrite his backstory so that there is a third brother, then that's up to him,” Coran said. “Let's see... we've had Shiro and Gyro. What shall be the third brother's name? Hiro?”

“I hate all of you except for Keith,” Shiro said, prodding at his screen.

Coran gave them all a few more minutes while he searched for the storyline he wanted to use. It was bound to be a fun one, especially after his talk with Keith the day before. He had been sure that the others would be interested in another quest, but Keith hadn't been part of the original game and he wanted to include the current Black Paladin in their fun.

As it turned out, Keith had an interesting idea, and Coran had the perfect plot to go along with it.

He glanced up, smiling softly as he watched Allura lean over to Lance to ask him about something. Hunk appeared to be mumbling spells under his breath and then checking his game pad to make sure he got them right. Keith had his pad turned so Pidge couldn't sneak a peak at what he was doing, no matter how hard she tried.

It warmed Coran's heart to see them all having fun after everything they had been through.

He cleared his throat to get their attention and begin the game. “Tales of your miraculous defeat of the mighty and powerful wizard known as Dakin have spread far and wide across Aurita. Townspeople rejoice wherever you go and you no longer want for food and drink. Today we begin in the wilds of the Mysterious Forest, on a quest for a king of a distant land. It appears his daughter, Princess Mora, has been kidnapped and it is up to you all to save her!”

“A princess?” Lance's eyes lit up.

Hunk groaned. “Oh no... Coran, does it have to be a princess?”

“Yeah, can't we rescue a handsome prince instead? It doesn't always have to be a damsel in distress,” Pidge complained.

“But rescuing a princess is a staple of all classic stories! C'mon, guys, don't take this from me!” Lance begged.

Allura rolled her eyes.

Coran looked at them peevishly for interrupting his storytelling. “Are you going to let me continue, or would you like to run this campaign on your own?”

No one spoke again.

“As I was saying...”

-

If not for the haunting sounds of wildlife, the Mysterious Forest would be a beautiful place to explore. Trees towered overhead, their branches reaching out to cast shade over the ground, while still allowing in enough light for the underbrush to thrive. A single main path, comprised of dirt compacted under heavy travel, wound through the forest.

A sheer mountainside rose to the right of the path. It looked as though the rock had been carved away some time ago, though by what, no one knew.

Valayun led the way down the path, her bow knocked in preparation for trouble. She had heard tales of bandits and thieves who lurked within the woods and knew it was best to be ready to anything. Her blue eyes wearily scanned the underbrush, watching out for any movement.

Behind her was Pike and Block, who quietly talked to pass the time. Pike was particularly excited about their current quest to find a kidnapped princess, and was disappointed that no one else seemed to share his enthusiasm.

Meklavar traveled behind them, her ax at the ready. Her stonesense screamed that something wasn't right, and she was easily the jumpiest of the party.

Bringing up the rear was Gyro, who looked around with a sense of wide-eyed wonder at the beauty of the wilderness around them. He was particularly taken with the brightly colored flora and the pleasant smells they emitted. He felt like nothing could possibly go wrong. After all, the weather was pleasant and their quest had only just begun!

What could possibly go wrong?

-

“Shiro, roll for perception,” Coran instructed.

Shiro frowned. “I thought I already did that.”

“You did. Now I need you to roll a second time,” Coran said.

Everyone leaned forward to watch Shiro roll the die, eager to see what it would stop on. There was a collective groan when it tipped over one final time to end on “two”.

“Tough luck, Shiro,” Keith said sympathetically.

Coran's delight was obvious to everyone and he toned down his cackle to a snicker, hiding his face behind his game pad. “Suddenly, there is a loud crashing sound from the cliffside! Something has knocked into the precariously perched boulders up at the top, jarring them loose. They fall, picking up speed as they go, and while they make a great deal of noise, Gyro is too busy admiring the flowers to pay attention. Will anyone warn our poor paladin of the danger he faces?”

“How do you not hear a landslide?” Pidge asked with a shake of her head. “Nevermind. I'm the closest to him, so I shout out to try and warn him.”

“Shiro, another roll, if you will?”

Shiro sighed and rolled again, not at all surprised to see another roll number. Even the dice gods were working against him. “Am I dead?”

“Oh, I'm afraid so. You hear Meklavar's warning, but aren't able to move in time and are crushed by a landslide,” Coran rattles off as though commenting on the weather.

Shiro gave the Altean a petulant look as he sent over the data for his new character without being asked.

Keith watched the exchange with a furrowed brow. “Should I make a second character now, or...”

“You don't need to. Shiro just has really bad luck,” Pidge reassured him.

Coran took a moment to scan through the new data before jumping back in. “Our heroes take a few hours to mourn their fallen friend and construct a small monument in his honor.”

-

The loss of Gyro the Paladin dampened even Pike's spirits. The four heroes continued on their way, searching for the entrance to the caves where it was rumored that Princess Mora was being held.

“Does anyone else think it's weird that we haven't seen any bandits yet? You'd think they would at least have traps laid for us,” Meklavar said.

“Are you trying to jinx us?” Pike demanded. His eyes scanned the foliage critically, as though he expected something to immediately jump out and attack them.

Valayun uneasily slowed, closing the distance between her and Pike by a few paces. “Maybe we've gone the wrong way?”

“Can't be. This is the only path,” Block said. “Unless they didn't take the path?”

Meklavar shook her head. “No, you're right. They must have taken the path, especially since they have a captive with them. We would be able to see if they went another way, wouldn't we? There would be broken branches and stuff.”

They looked to Valayun in the hope that she had some skill in tracking, but she was just as confused as the rest of them.

The four of them stopped walking as a debate broke out over whether they should keep going or if it was best to go back and look for tracks. Pike and Valayun were for staying on the path, while Block and Meklavar wanted to go back.

And that was when things went from bad, to worse.

A howl pierced the air just before a massive wolf sprang out of the underbrush, taking all of them off guard. It used its advantage to pin Meklavar to the ground and opened its mouth to reveal a row of sharp, white teeth.

Meklavar closed her eyes, praying that someone would save her, or else that death would be swift and painless.

-

Pidge laughed as Kosmo licked across her cheek before he lowered his paws and padded over to the do the same to Keith.

“It's nice to see you too,” Keith said with a chuckle. He patted the cosmic wolf on the head, and once Kosmo was satisfied with the attention he received, he crawled under the table to take a nap near his favorite people.

“A new encounter has begun and it's time to figure out attacking order! Everyone, go ahead and roll your dice,” Coran instructed. “And just for fun... Shiro and Keith, the two of you can roll as well.”

Shiro trepidatiously reached for his die.

-

The sparkling light of Block's magic formed a barrier between Meklavar and certain death, which gave Valayun the opportunity to lay into the beast with her arrows. It reared back, releasing Meklavar from its grasp, and that was when Pike rushed in to pull her to safety.

“Are you alright?” Block shouted as he began charging up his next spell.

“I'm okay!” Meklavar quickly called back. She took a moment to reorient herself and then unhooked her ax so she could jump into the fight.

Arrows flew and spells were slung. A gleaming ax swung against the side of the beast. Pike's sharp blades danced as he flitted about.

None of it appeared to do more than anger the wolf.

“Should we run?” Block asked.

“Do you really think we can outrun that?” Pike asked in disbelief.

Block ducked behind a tree for a little extra cover. “Maybe if Valayun summons one of her magical steeds and I enchant my staff to fly, we might stand a chance at getting away.”

“And what would that solve?” Meklavar demanded. “We run and leave the princess with those bandits? Even if we get away, we still need to come back this way and there's no guarantee that this creature will be gone.”

“Meklavar is right. We have to deal with this now,” Valayun agreed.

Pike loudly shrieked as he barely dodged a swipe from one massive paw. His voice went high as he asked: “Does anyone have a plan for that?!”

Meklavar thought for a moment. “Maybe if we all attack it at once and hit it from different angles. That might confuse it enough that it won't know who to go after.”

“It's worth a try,” Valayun said. She selected a summoning arrow and fired it into the air. A moment later, a flying horse swooped down and allowed Valayun onto their back. She took to the skies to distract the beast, giving her allies enough time to get into place.

And then their assault began anew.

The beast snarled in rage. Just as they had hoped, it didn't know who to go after first. It turned to look at each of them, but each time it tried to attack, someone would hit it from another angle.

A horn trumpeted.

From within the forest, a man with dark hair came riding in on a magnificent black steed. He lifted his sword high and joined the battle.

The beast didn't last long after that, and as it lay dying on the forest floor, the adventurers approached the newcomer. One-by-one, they introduced themselves, until all that was left was for the stranger to speak his name.

“I am but a simple ranger, traveling with my fearless companion,” he said, fondly patting his horse's neck. “My name is Paladin.”

-

In that moment, anyone in or near the common room was treated to the sound of the Paladins of Voltron losing their minds over a single sentence, while Shiro sat back and looked very pleased with himself. Coran was laughing so hard that he was crying.

Once Coran calmed enough that he could speak clearly, he wiped away his tears and coaxed them back into playing their game.

With the addition of Shiro's ranger, they discovered that they had missed a second path and it was only thanks to his tracking skill that they were able to find it. The new path was a shortcut, leading directly to the caves, while the main path would have eventually branched out, with one trail leading up to the top of the mountain and the other leading out of the forest. Coran was the only one disappointed that they no longer needed to fight their way down through the mountain.

They charged ahead into the caves with their spirits renewed, and Lance happily showed off that Pike held torches in his inventory, after buying them during his and Shiro's mini-session with Coran.

“So is Keith actually playing, or is he just here to watch?” Lance asked as he rolled to dismantle a trap that Hunk nearly triggered.

“I've been playing!” Keith protested. “You've seen me roll!”

“Oh yeah? Then where's your character?” Lance challenged with the air of someone who knew they had already won.

Coran stepped in before things could escalate to shouting. “Keith and I discussed his role before we began, and I have sent him messages to determine where he currently is and what he's doing. Be patient; he'll join you soon.”

“I didn't know these things could send messages,” Pidge said, looking at her game pad with renewed interest.

“My bandmates and I always used them to enrich our experience with the game. Not only can it be used to send messages between the Lore Master and one of the players, players can also send group messages. Depending on the race you've picked, you can choose to send messages in that language, and it will only translate for anyone who has knowledge of that language,” Coran said. “Though it's more like gibberish than an actual language. Now, where were we? Ah, yes...”

-

The team of eager adventurers continued on their way, dismantling traps and using their wide range of skills to avoid trouble. They only got lost once and that was when they encountered a small party of bandits, who kept dropping their weapons and were incompetent in general.

Pike pilfered anything useful before they moved on.

“This is way less interesting than Dakin's lair,” Meklavar said, sounding disappointed. “Where's all of the treasure? The interesting weaponry?”

“Well that's why they kidnapped the princess, isn't it? They're holding her for ransom so that then they'll have treasures,” Block suggested.

“I don't know why you keep saying things like that when you know it's just going to bring us more trouble.” Pike directed his words to Meklavar, who ignored him. “Besides, just because you haven't found anything, doesn't mean there's nothing here.” He grinned and jingled his coin purse in front of her face.

Paladin frowned at the blatant theivery that was being flaunted in front of him. There was no point in saying anything. Pike had only laughed the first time he scolded him for it.

“Meklavar, can you read anything with your stonesense?” Valayun asked.

Meklavar placed her hand on the wall and frowned. “There is... something. I can feel it more strongly now. I think there's another dwarf here!”

“That's good, right?” Valayun asked.

Meklavar shrugged. “Not if they're one of the bandits. Then we might be in trouble, since they'll be able to tell we're coming.”

“I don't like this,” Block said nervously.

“All we can do is keep moving forward. If we stop to worry about what could be, we'll be here all day,” Paladin said. He took the lead down the hall, not waiting for anyone to respond, and the others hurried to fall in line behind him.

They all kept their weapons drawn. There was every chance that they were walking deeper into an ambush and none of them wanted to be caught unaware.

Every now and then, Meklavar reached out to touch the stone walls, trying to get a feel for what was going on. Just before a turn, she hissed out “wait!”

Paladin brought up his sword in time to block a strike from another blade. The clang of steel-on-steel rang out in the tunnel, impossibly loud. Paladin grit his teeth and bore down, refusing to let the assailant take an inch.

“Who are you? What are you doing in this place?” demanded the stranger.

“We're here to beat you and rescue the princess!” Pike exclaimed from the back of their line.

The stranger frowned. “They kidnapped someone else as well?”

Paladin let up a little, puzzled by that statement. “What do you mean 'someone else'? We only know about Princess Mora.”

There was something very strange going on, but no one could feel that more than Meklavar. Her stonesense sang, but not in a way that indicated danger. “Paladin, I don't think he's one of the bandits.”

The stranger rolled his eyes. “Do I look like a bandit to you?”

Behind Meklavar, the others made sounds of protest - “Of course he does!” - but Paladin evidently agreed with Meklavar and slowly lowered his sword. He kept it at the ready, just in case.

Valayun refused to lower her arrow and kept it trained on the stranger. “Who are you? How do we know you're someone we can trust?”

“Because I believe I'm the one you were sent to rescue,” he told them. “My name is Mizerik, son of Princess Mora.”

-

“Nope.” Lance shook his head and crossed his arms over his chest. “No way.”

Pidge appeared utterly delighted by the twist. She turned to Keith with a grin and raised her hand, palm facing him. He looked puzzle for a moment and then held up his hand the same way.

“High five?” Pidge asked.

Understanding dawned on Keith's face and he gently clapped his hand to hers. “What are we doing this for?”

“Because we're dwarf pals! This is going to be so much fun!” Pidge said. She picked up her gamepad and began to intently type something.

“You two planned this?” Allura asked, looking to Coran.

He beamed at her. “Keith had the idea after I explained a bit about how the game works. It's all part of an even bigger story I have in mind. I figured that since you all could use something to do, I could do a bigger campaign than the last time. This is only the beginning!”

“I think we'll be able to find time for that,” Shiro said, sounding amused.

“Still worried that my dad might make good on his threat?” Pidge asked.

“You think he won't?”

Pidge wasn't going to argue with him on that.

Coran let them talk for a moment while he took a drink of water. They'd been going for a while and could probably wrap things up soon, or at least take a break before heading into the next part of the campaign.

He scrolled through his chosen story and decided that he'd wait to see what they wanted to do about the remaining bandits first. There wasn't any treasure to find, but the odds were that they would press on until they found something interesting, and he had a misleading side-plot involving a mysterious key if they really wanted to go that route. He almost hoped Keith would convince them that it was unnecessary, but the thought of getting to send them on a wild floklop chase was highly amusing.

It was all dependent on whether or not they took Keith's deal. There was something his character was after, and in exchange for helping him, he would grant a favor.

What was it the humans said again?

Quid pro quo?

[katoninefandoms]

1. “Please, don’t leave.”

I found a prompt list a while back, and I have been using it to keep some of my creativity flowing. So. Here is the first installment. Also, shoutout to my friend Kim who helped me figure out pairings/main characters for the first 40 or so. This one features Steve, Bucky, and Sam. 

Steve trudged back into the apartment, groaning softly as the muscles in his legs pulled uncomfortably. He wanted nothing more than to fall into bed and sleep off the last 36 hours. He tossed his shield into his closet and then laid down, uncaring that Sam would probably yell at him in the morning for getting grime all over the sheets. It wouldn’t matter, though, not really. Steve would do the laundry and make him and Bucky breakfast, and it would be fine.

He was asleep moments later. When he woke, he was still alone, still flopped out on the bed. Still grimy. The room? Undisturbed. And Steve was starting to wonder where Sam and Bucky were. Usually, they slept right beside him, but neither one seemed to even be in the apartment. He couldn’t hear them; their footsteps or breathing. No movement anywhere.

He pulled himself up off the bed, the soreness gone. The serum was doing its job. He stripped out of his suit and showered, keeping an ear out for anyone moving around the apartment. Even as he toweled off, there was still no sound.

His footfalls were silent against the carpet as he walked back into the bedroom, pulling on an undershirt and a pair of sweatpants. He noticed, though, that the dresser seemed emptier than usual. Maybe Sam or Bucky were doing their laundry this morning? They could be in the laundry room, elsewhere in the Tower. That would make sense. The thought certainly eased the knot forming in his stomach.

“JARVIS,” Steve called, “please, let Sam and Buck know that I’m waiting for them.”

Usually, JARVIS would answer, and Steve would be told approximately when the two would be arriving. But there was no reply.

“JARVIS?”

Nothing.

Steve swallowed hard as the knots in his stomach tightened again. “J?” He headed for the elevator and pressed the button. It opened easily for him and he got in, taking it down to the common floor. Maybe there was someone else he could talk to, Nat and Clint asleep on the couch together after a movie or something. No one was down there, either.

He scoured the level thoroughly, checking every room, every closet, every crevice.

He took the elevator down further to the lab levels, running - sprinting - through each floor hoping to find Tony or Bruce, or maybe one of the many Stark Industries employees that should have been working, or just getting into work. No one. Nothing. No thrum of machinery.

Panic started to set it, gripping at his chest and clawing into his lungs. He heaved in air as he tore open the door to the emergency staircase. He ran down the stairs, two at a time, until he reached the ground floor. He ran to the entrance doors and tried to pull it open.

It wouldn’t budge.

He yanked at it again. And again. And again. Nothing.

Nothing.

Nothing.

He stared out at the street. People were moving along walking and talking and smiling at each other. He sighed in relief, even if his stomach wouldn’t relax, and started to pound on the door, hoping to get someone’s attention. No one looked his way. He pounded harder. No one’s heads even twitched in his direction. The people that did face the doors seemed to look straight through him. He sobbed and pounded at the glass, frustrated that it wouldn’t so much as crack.

“Help me!” he cried. “Let me out!”

He kicked the door, hoping it would help, and when his foot landed back on the floor, a small splash reached his ears. It didn’t register for a moment, and he took another step, made another splash. He looked down, frowning, and saw a small puddle of water under his feet. He took a step back, away from the puddle, but it followed him, growing larger. He watched in horror as it widened, reaching each corner of the room before starting to fill, slowly. It reached his ankles, and he was starting to realize its temperature - ice cold. He shivered and ran towards the door again. The water had suddenly risen, reaching above his knees as he tried to run. He reached the doors again and started to pound, to try to kick, to do anything to escape. The door wouldn’t budge, and it was harder and harder to keep his feet on the ground as the water rose to his neck, slowing his arms and choking him with its ice. He swam up with the water as long as he could, trying to keep his mouth and nose above it, shivering and screaming for help.

It soon overtook him, and he swam back down to the door, desperately trying to pull it open. He could see the team. They were standing on the sidewalk outside the building. He pounded and shouted, trying to get their attention, but they didn’t notice. They were focused on each other, laughing and talking. Hugging and touching. Sam and Bucky’s arms were around each other. Sam leaned over to kiss Bucky’s cheek.

Immediately, a current ripped him away from the door, tearing a scream from his throat. The team faded from view and the world around him became darker, colder. He shivered and drew a breath. Water flooded his lungs and he gagged, writhing and turning over and over in the water, reaching out but finding nothing to grab. A weight settled on him, and he was pushed down. Down, down, down. Ice threaded through his veins, chiling him from the inside out. His lungs felt like blocks of ice, weighing him down and furthering his body’s shutdown.

A hand landed on his shoulder, searing his frozen skin. He screamed, his lungs bursting and he jerked up. He rolled away from the touch and fell onto something solid.

The air wasn’t cold. His own harsh breathing echoed in his ears. He trembled and choked down sobs, eyes shut tight as his fingers gripped and tore the carpet beneath him. The rip of fabric grounded him enough that he could open his eyes. He stared at the rent carpet, still clutched in his hands. After a few moments, he could hear the breaths of two others. His head tilted slightly in that direction, but he couldn’t make himself look up. Someone knelt in front of him, and two dark brown, warm hands cupped his cheeks. His breath left him all at once and he leaned into the touch, eyes closing again.

“S-Sam…”

“I’m here, baby,” he murmured.

Sam pulled Steve closer, helping him up onto the bed and cradling him to his chest, gently rubbing his back and petting his hair. Steve trembled against him, tears slipping as his breath shook.

“Buck?” he whispered, afraid to open his eyes.

A colder arm wrapped around Steve’s middle, but it filled him with warmth instead of chilling him. Warm lips pressed a kiss to the back of his neck, stubble gently scratching the skin.

“Right here, Stevie.”

Steve sobbed once, and reached back to hold him closer, clinging to Sam’s shirt with his other hand. “Please,” he whimpered, “Please, don’t leave…”

“We’re not goin’ anywhere,” Bucky assured him. “Right, Sammy?”

“Right.” Sam pressed a soft kiss to Steve’s forehead. “We’ve got you.”

Steve nodded, even as he cried, letting them wrap themselves around him, surrounding him and keeping him safe and warm. There will be daily updates for about 2 weeks, so be sure to keep an eye out!

[bby-bxrnes]

Badass Ballerina

Ship: Bucky Barnes x Dancer!Reader

Summary: You present yourself as a major tomboy, with no girly side to be seen. You fight like the boys, swear like the boys, and drink like the boys. But then, one night, Bucky sees a side of you that you keep hidden from everyone else.

Words: 2477

Warnings: Major fluff, ridiculous swearing, really creative swearing, alcohol consumption, teeny bit of violence (sparring w/ Steve), really tooth-rotting fluff, crappy knowledge of dancing

A/N: Honestly, this was super self indulgent of me and it’s kinda a mess but hey, it’s cute so I hope y’all enjoy it.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When Tony had announced a new member joining the team, the rest of the Avengers weren’t sure who to expect. They certainly didn’t expect her though. She arrived, dressed in dark colors, a leather jacket adorning her frame as well as some worn in boots covering her feet. At first, they thought she might be like Natasha, silent and brooding, but they couldn’t be more wrong. She was far from silent, she had the wit and sass of Tony and Clint combined. She was quite intimidating yet everyone on the team loved to be in her presence because she always had something funny to say. She was close with everyone, but no one knew much about her past. One particular person in the compound had made it his mission to peel away that rough exterior and see what was underneath.

The first time Bucky had watched her fight, he was mesmerized. She hadn’t opted to spar with Natasha, but practically demanded to spar with Steve. Steve was rather hesitant, easily being twice her weight and a foot taller than her, but she had been stubborn, so he finally acquiesced. “Don’t hold back on me, old man.” she had taunted, drawing her hands up to guard her face. Steve just chucked and shook his head, matching her stance. They circled for a moment, a confident smile plastered on her face. Surprisingly, she struck first, lunging forwards and landing a solid punch right to Steve’s sternum, successfully knocking the air out of him. “You’re getting slow, c’mon gramps.” she laughed, bouncing excitedly on the balls of her feet. Steve smirked and started trying to jab out at her, but she was able to block all of his attempts, countering with blows of her own. 

She moved with such grace, but power at the same time, an at-ease smile on her face the whole time. Her and Steve were now fully going at it, trading kicks and aerial stunts, the rest of the team whooping and cheering at the entertaining fight. Even with his super-soldier stamina, Bucky could tell Steve was getting worn out, but Y/N showed no signs of slowing. With one attack, Y/N had done a classic Natasha move, clamping her thighs around Steve’s head and threw her body weight around, slamming Steve to the mat. She was able to wrestle him over onto his front and pull one of his arms into a submission hold, eventually making Steve give a few desperate taps with his free hand. She climbed off of him and offered her hand down to him, helping the now exhausted Captain America up to his feet. The smile she gave everyone ignited something in his chest he hadn’t felt for a long time, and he knew that this girl was going to be trouble for his heart.

To say that she had a dirty mouth would be an understatement. Her swearing vocabulary was enough to make Steve flush and shout “Language!” from across the room. It caught everyone off guard at first, such foul language coming from her should’ve been expected, but Bucky couldn’t help but stare in amusement whenever she let out a string of colorful expletives. She was absolutely unashamed of using otherwise insulting names to address her friends, the more crude the name, the closer the person was to her. 

Tony, Clint, and Sam were usually called fucknut or something creative like that, while her ruder ones such as cockmuncher and ass-eater were reserved for Bucky, who she had adopted as her best friend. “Fucking goddamnit, cock eating, mother-shitting asshole!” was one of Bucky’s favorite phrases he had heard her yell during a rather grueling mission where one of HYDRA’s monkeys had tried to grab her ass. Steve, of course, had frozen where he was at the filthy words flowing through the comms, causing him to almost get knocked out, had Bucky not been nearby to save his ass. She would swear at anything and everything, especially if Steve was nearby, she loved to get a rise out of him.

“Alright, fuckers! Who wants to play a game?” she yelled, walking into the common room with several bottles of various alcohol in her hands. “Who thinks they can drink me under the table?” she smirked, glancing around at her friends, a challenging glint in her eyes. “I’m down.” Clint said, lounging comfortably on the couch. “I’m game.” Tony had said, being nearly as competitive as Y/N. “What about you, Buck? You too chicken?” she taunted, waving the bottles in front of him. “It wouldn’t be fair for me to join, doll. I can’t get drunk on regular alcohol, only that stuff that Thor brings from Asgard.” he said, slightly grateful that he had an out. “Well, lucky you, I had the big guy send some down, just for you.” she said, handing Bucky an unlabeled bottle of yellow liquid that seemed to be practically glowing. “Alright, I’m in.” he huffed, laughing at the malicious smirk on her face. She grinned wolfishly at her three challengers, passing Tony his favorite whiskey, and the vodka to Clint, keeping the tequila for herself. 

The four of them went shot for shot, Y/N electing Natasha to keep count. Clint tapped out after finishing half of the bottle, claiming that he’d rather not wake up hating himself. Next was Tony a few shots later, claiming that Pepper would kill him if he got absolutely shitfaced without ‘proper supervision’. Bucky was honestly surprised at the fact that she was easily keeping up with him, and the two ended up drinking till they were both out of alcohol and pretty drunk, but neither were ready to tap out yet. “You have now won the position of my new drinking buddy.” she had proclaimed, ruffling Bucky’s hair drunkenly. They both woke up the next morning with pounding headaches, but when they saw each other in the kitchen, they fist-bumped and murmured “worth it” at the same time.

Bucky awoke in a cold sweat, contents of his nightmare slowly leaving his mind as his trained ears picked up a foreign sound this late at night. He threw the covers off of himself and slid a pair of sweats on before emerging from his room out into the dark hallway. Bucky was confused as he heard the soft classical music drifting through the dark compound. He assumed everyone had been asleep, but was proven wrong by the soft sounds bouncing off the walls. He began his adventure, following his trained ears to find the source of the music. He stopped outside what was usually used as a training room. He tried to listen over the soft music for a hint as to who was inhabiting the room, but all he could hear were soft footfalls. 

He opened the door slowly, being as silent as possible so he wouldn’t disturb the inhabitant. His breath caught in his throat when he saw the silhouette of a woman dancing in the dark of the room, the only light source was the moonlight that filtered in through the ceiling to floor windows that covered the wall opposite him. The figure continued to dance, completely unaware of Bucky’s presence. He was transfixed as the girl effortlessly balanced in her pointe shoes, moving gracefully across the floor. The music came to an end and the ballerina finished dancing, her chest heaving softly with her breaths. “Wow.” Bucky breathed, causing the girl to turn to him. “Bucky! What are you doing here?” she called, the voice finally giving away who it was. “Y/N! I didn’t know you danced.” he said, completely stunned that the most tomboy member of the team was so graceful. 

“Bucky, I swear if you tell a soul about this.” she threatened, sitting down and beginning to unwrap the ribbons that secured the dainty shoes to her feet. “I won’t. It’ll be our secret. That was so beautiful, Y/N.” he breathed, walking over and sitting next to her. “Thanks dorkwad.” she snorted. “And there’s the Y/N that I know.” he laughed, watching as a huge smile overtook her face. “I used to dance, y’know. Back then, in the 40’s. I haven’t for a while though.” he said, smiling softly at the memories that resurfaced. “I started dancing when I was little. Boys used to make fun of me and push me around because of it. So I started hiding it, dressing like boys, acting like boys, and it became a part of me. But I’ve always loved dancing, you just kinda lose yourself in the music, and it’s so freeing.” she said, eyes lighting up with passion. 

“I’ve wanted to dance again, just haven’t found the right dame, y’know?” he said, lying through his teeth. He already found the girl he wanted to dance with again and she was sitting right next to him. “I’ve actually never danced, y’know, regularly. Never found a guy who wanted to dance with me.” she said, face falling. “I can try to teach you. It’s been a while, but I could try, if you’d like.” he offered, standing up and holding his hand out to her. She smiled and nodded, taking his hand and allowing him to pull her up. Bucky still wasn’t used to this softer side of Y/N, he was used to her being boisterous and loud, swearing like a sailor. He went over to where her phone was plugged into the speaker and put on his favorite song, a song he loved to dance to in the 40’s. 

He walked back over to her, the jazz flowing through his veins, filling him with a familiar warmth. She stood, looking uncharacteristically nervous, Bucky giving her a soft, reassuring smile. “Here, your right hand on my shoulder, don’t worry, you’re fine.” he instructed, noticing her hesitancy to touch his metal shoulder. He placed his left hand gently on her hip, taking her left hand in his right hand. “Loosen up, Y/N. Feel the music, let it move you.” he said, feeling her tense, then relax into his hold. “Follow me.” he whispered, swaying gently, before taking a step, Y/N following. They repeated this motion, him stepping and her following, before she got the hang of it. They danced barefoot, just enjoying the other’s presence. The song slowed to an end and the two of them stood, still swaying, eyes locked together. 

At one point while they were dancing, Y/N’s hands had shifted to lock around Bucky’s neck, Bucky’s arms now wrapped around her waist, holding her form close to his bare chest. Her head rested in the crook of his neck, Bucky was still stunned at this version of Y/N, all quiet and pliant, almost craving the closeness of Bucky. “Y/N?” he whispered, breaking the silence that had fallen over them. “Hm?” she hummed, not moving from her position. “I-I’ve got something to tell you.” he breathed, heart hammering in his chest. “What is it, Buck?” she asked, pulling her head back to look him in the eyes. “Earlier, when I said, I hadn’t found the right dame to dance with, I was lying. I found my girl.” he whispered, watching her face fall. “Oh. Why aren’t you out there dancing with her then?” she asked, attempting to worm her way out of his grasp, but he wouldn’t let her. “I am. She’s right here in front of me.” he finally confessed, his blue eyes searching her Y/E/C eyes. 

“What?” she breathed, a little disbelieving laugh escaping her lips. “Y/N, I- I think I love you. I have for a while.” Bucky said, dropping his forehead to rest against hers, eyes slipping closed. “Oh, Buck.” she sighed and he immediately assumed the worst. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have done that.” he said, this time he was the one trying to escape, but she just tightened her grip on him. “No, dumbass. If anything you should’ve told me sooner. I’m bad with emotions, I haven’t dated anyone for a while cause I couldn’t let anyone in. But it’s different with you, Buck. You are just so goddamn trustable.” she laughed dryly. “I think I love you too, Buck.” She said, hands cupping his face and making him look at her. Bucky couldn’t help the huge smile that overtook his face, making her smile so bright that it’s radiance could’ve rivaled the sun’s. 

Bucky gathered all his courage and leaned down, capturing her lips in a gentle kiss. She kissed back instantly, a sigh of content leaving her lips. When they broke apart, their foreheads stayed rested together, eyes locked, swaying to the music in their own heads. “Can I take you out on a proper date sometime?” he asked, laughing at the face she pulled. “Nothing too fancy, right? I still fucking hate dresses.” she groaned. “No, nothing fancy. If you wanted, we could get some really greasy pizza and go mini golfing.” he laughed. “Sounds perfect to me.” she hummed, pressing another kiss to his lips. He eventually had to let her go so she could gather her things, but he walked her back to her room, the both of them parting ways with a sweet kiss, leaving both of them giggling like teenagers when neither of them wanted to walk away first. Bucky decided to finally give her one last kiss before continuing down the hall to his room, sneaking a glance back at her, smiling when he saw her still watching, he waved one last time before entering his room and falling with a happy sigh onto his bed. 

The next morning he was relaxing on the couch having an argument with Sam when she waltzed in, stealing a pop-tart off of Steve’s plate before plopping herself directly into Bucky’s lap. Bucky was surprised at first but smiled happily and wrapped his arms around her waist, accepting the piece of pop-tart that Y/N held out to him. To say that everyone was shocked at this development would be yet another understatement. The two seemed to be in their own little world, joking and laughing like normal, but the little occasional kisses they shared confused everyone. “What the fuck.” Steve exclaimed, successfully grabbing the attention of the two lovebirds. “Did Captain Righteous just swear? I did it! I finally got Cap to swear!” she exclaimed, throwing her head back in boisterous laughter. Bucky couldn’t help but laugh with you, watching everyone just stare at you. He knew they were absolutely caught off guard. Just yesterday she was calling him all sorts of crude names, but now, here she was sitting in his lap kissing him. As she joked and laughed with everyone else, slowly bringing everyone back to reality, Bucky was overwhelmed with love for her, his own Badass Ballerina.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Everything List: @rick-morty-reblogs @myattemptatfanfic @feelmyroarrrr

[butiaintgonnaloveem]

One for the Tropey Case

Characters: Sam, Dean, The Reader, others - just go with it

Warnings: SNARK, language

Word Count: Approx. 3k

A/N: Friends, I write this with nothing but love. I’ve been inspired by my dear friend (and Tumblr Wife - it’s legit) @seenashwrite and her Nope saga. You should also read this one. My mind just kind of went off the rails, won’t you come with me? I hope this jump starts me back into writing, I’ve been feeling pretty out of it lately. This is also hopefully acceptable for @kathaswings Lina’s Chiliad Challenge. Thanks for the bonus time. Love me some feedback and all that constructive criticism, too!

A hole would be something, but this was nothing...

“I think we’re good to hide out in here for a while. Man, I needed a break, I’m telling you all this Valentine’s Day stuff is killing me. I’ve been Mr. Right Now more than my body can handle, I’m getting dehydrated…” The deep voice echoes off the ragged rock walls.

“Dean, shut up. You hear that? Hello?”

I glance around in the near darkness trying to locate the source before I call back, “Hello?”

Footfalls tap along the damp floor, growing louder as they move closer. “Yo! Someone there?”

A gentle light illuminates the area as they move closer. I recognize them immediately, a nervous grin making my lips twitch as I lean against the car.

They glare at me, eyes scanning for anything suspicious.

“It’s not my fault,” I defend, throwing my hands up in the air. “I don’t know what this is either.”

“The Upsidedown?” Sam suggests.

“Don’t be stupid, Sam.” Dean sneers, eyes scanning the shadows around us.

“Is that...you?” I direct them to look at a rough painting on the wall.

It’s primitive, but still clear - the two of them stretched out across the seats of the Impala. Dean’s eyes dart over the details for only a moment until he’s pulled away to another part of the wall with another painting - the two of them standing before a funeral pyre. I follow his movements as he takes in all the walls around them, each covered in another painted moment from their lives, some tragic, some triumphant. It makes me spin, pointing out each memory as I recall them, stopping once I realize their eyes are focused on something behind me. Only when I hear the low growl do I finally go quiet. Sam and Dean both shrug, Dean’s face flexes between alarmed, and confused until he finally takes a chance and speaks to the creature.

“Who are you?”

Glowing eyes appear, smooth pale skin flashes in the light. “I am G’mork.” It growls back, shockingly clear for a creature that doesn’t appear to have lips.

“Um okay, well...nanu nanu? G’mork? Sorry for the interruption, but, we’re just heading on out. So, if you wanna send us in the right direction, we’ll just...go.” Dean points and spins around him.

“You cannot go.” It growls.

“The hell we can’t.” Dean growls back.

“There are no boundaries, no doorways, no portals here. There is nowhere for you to go.”

“Then how did we get here?”

“Foolish giants. Don’t you you know anything about Fanfiction? It’s the world of human fantasy. Every road, every cheap motel, every half empty bottle of whiskey in it, is a piece of the dreams and desires of fanfiction writers. Therefore, it has no boundaries.”

“So where is everything then? Where’s the cheap motel? The crappy, run-down bar? Hell, the bunker? This? This is….it’s nothing.” Dean gestures vaguely.

“Exactly.” Thunder booms in the darkness, the ground shakes beneath us.

“What’s going on?”

“The Nothing is growing stronger.”

“The Nothing? What’s that?” I ask as I step closer to stand between the broad shoulders of the towering Winchesters.

The creature inches forward slightly, revealing itself more in the light and alarming me with the lack of features on its face, “It’s the emptiness that’s left. It’s like a despair, destroying this world, and I have been trying to help it.”

“What the fuck does that even mean?” Dean asks, pleadingly, his face etched with crinkles of disbelief, “I’ve seen the shit they come up with. I’ve been there. In all of it. How I’ve not exploded from pie, I don’t know, but there’s like new shit they’re pulling us into - All. The. Time.”

“Yeah, I mean,” Sam pauses to huff a little bit, annoyed with the creature, “I can’t tell you how many times I’ve managed to graduate from law school, or tied girls to my bed to-”

He trails off at Dean’s double-chin look of ‘whatwasthatnow?’

“Point is,” he throws a hand up at Dean to tell him ‘not now’ before addressing the creature again, “there’s plenty there. What emptiness are you talking about?”

“Exactly!” G’Mork hisses, “How many times have you gone gooey from meeting your soulmate, or shown up drunk and bloody on a doorstep and comforted with sex and stitches? How many times have you hate-fucked after a fight or cried when your hunter/girlfriend died while trying to protect you and made you promise to let her go? How many times? It’s the tropes, the repetitiveness, the predictability of it all.”

We all glare at the monster, angry at it for its honesty.

“The writers - because they’ve begun to lose their creative energy, they’ve used the same tropes over and over. They’re losing their hopes, forgetting their dreams. And so, The Nothing grows stronger.”

The ground shakes and rocks crumble from the walls around us. “But why?” I cry out.

“Because people who have no hopes are easy to control, and whoever has control has the power!”

The paintings crack as another rumble shakes the ground, lightning streaks across the sky. We all lose our balance for a moment until the earth settles. I glare at the creature, anger burning through my veins.

“Who are you, really?”

It offers a sinister chuckle, then sighs as the Winchesters join in the glaring, “I am the servant of the power behind The Nothing. I am sent to kill the motivation of those who could destroy The Nothing. I lost one of them in the Inbox Full of Chain Messages, her name was Nash.”

“Nash?!” The three of us ask in unison. Sam and Dean continue with a synchronised, “Shit.” while I mumble out a “Thank Chuck.”

They both tilt their heads in a silent “Really?”

“What? If she’s not stuck in the Swamp of Eternal Writer’s Block, then we’re probably okay.”

“But...but - no. She’s not the hero, she is a pain in the-”

“Dean, she’s probably gonna find out about whatever you’re about to say, so speak carefully,” Sam reminds him.

Dean puckers his lips, biting back whatever he was about to blurt and drawing a deep breath through his nose. “Fine. Let’s deal with this douchebag and move on.”

“Douchebag? That’s the best you’ve got? No wonder no one likes you.”

“Wh - I - huh?” Dean splutters.

I narrow my eyes at the shadows around the beast. “Well, if this is the end, I’d rather go out fighting. Show yourself, stop hiding.”

“If you insist.” It groans as it crawls out from the darkness, the grotesque troll body illuminated and off-putting, but nothing quite prepares me for the stark contrast of the face, white and round - no mouth, no nose, only a pair of glasses to indicate where the actual face might be.

“Oh god, what the hell is that?” Sam turns his face away, covering his mouth and nose with his hand in disgust.

“It’s an Anon.” I answer flatly. “If we ignore it, it loses its power. Turn around.” I grab their shoulders and face them away. “Don’t talk about it, don’t respond to it, don’t look at it. Especially you, Dean, I know about that McDonald’s pie incident.”

“Are you sure? I mean, I can pretty much punch my way through anything.”

“Yeah, I mean, I’ve never even seen Lore on this thing. How do you know?”

“I just know. I’ve seen things. Now shut up.”

It goes quicker than I could have imagined. The creature tries every trick possible to regain our attention, but the attempts grow weaker with each dismissal until finally, it crawls back into the hole it came out of, withered, weak, whimpering.

“See? Toldya.”

“Nice one. Okay, so now what?”

We search around us, still not seeing any way out, any change in the scenery, nothing else appears to assist us. Instead, the ground crumbles even more and part it of falls away into a void of black.

“Sonofabitch! I thought we beat it!”

“I don’t know!” I reply, panic making my voice high and squeaky.

The walls begin to shake apart, rocks and dust falling everywhere before getting sucked away, leaving nothing but blackness. Dean’s hands reach for Baby, her paint gleaming in sourceless light. “No, not Baby. Not my car!”

He holds the door as tight as he can, but there’s nothing he can do as the paint flakes away, the metal shifts and breaks apart beneath his palms, and it disappears. He turns to me, a single tear rolling down his cheek, eyes glassy. His shoulders slump in defeat while he stares at the smears of dirt left on his skin.

“I tried. I couldn’t hold onto her. The Nothing pulled her right out of my hands. I failed.” Sam and I stare blankly at him. “They look like big, good, strong hands, don’t they?”

“Uhh, yeah, they sure do, Dean.” I turn to Sam with wide eyes, silently begging him to help his brother get a grip.

“I’ll just sit here and let it take me away too.” He whines. At that, Sam finally steps in, hugging his brother and holding him upright.

It’s all gone, blackness surrounds us except for the mysterious light the somehow illuminates us. There’s nowhere to go, nothing to work with, it’s just…

“The Void!” I shout.

“Huh?” they return with the Winsync.

“Oh, maybe you don’t know about that yet. Okay, well, it’s just what it sounds like, but we can get out of it. Sam, leave Dean alone.”

“Why? He’s my brother!” He clenches his jaw, eyes narrowed at me with anger and suspicion.

“Because, we need to annoy our way out of here, and there’s not much more annoying than a man whining and upset like a spoiled brat. I mean,” I suck in a hiss through my teeth, preparing for the backlash, “It’s just a car.”

Sam jumps away to avoid the swing of Dean’s arms as he whirls around on me. “Just a? How dare you! That car is the most important object in the history of the universe…”

He goes on and on, animated by anger and pride, his voice going deeper and louder as he details every repair he lovingly made, about all the grease stains in his clothing, about how he discovered how much he enjoyed washing her in a tiny pair of cut-offs. “...I mean, I’m pretty damn sure I was conceived in that car. The errant bodily fluids soaked in there must be-”

He gets hushed by a figure appearing from nowhere, a finger over his plump mouth, “Do NOT finish that thought,” she orders. He squints at her, but obeys.

“And you aaarre?” I ask.

“It doesn’t matter. I’m a Plot Device. What’s more important, is who you are.”

“Huh?” Our trio of voices sound out.

“What’s it matter? We failed. Even without the Anon, The Nothing still took everything,” Dean points out.

“That’s not true,” her sugar-sweet voice croons. She pulls a laptop out from behind her back, the screen blaringly bright from the open blank document. “A single blank document. This is all that remains of my vast empire.”

“So now what? We gotta write some of that fanfiction crap?” Dean whines out, an uneasy look on his face.

“Sam? I know that look - I’ve never been able to figure out how your mind works, but I know when it works.”

I can practically hear the whirring of wheels in Sam’s mind, “Okay. That’s not so bad. I remember what we learned from those high schoolers. There’s ah, Destiel, Sam-no Sastiel? I don’t know which is right. Uh..”

“No. None of that will do. You’ve had the solution with you the whole time.” Her smug little smile makes us all shift.

“What does that mean?”

“You brought her here. The Reader Insert. She was with you when you slept in the Impala. She was with you when you hustled that game of pool, just as she’s been with you this whole time.”

“But thats. Not. Possible. If there was someone else with us, we’d know it.”

I smack them both on the shoulder as I clear my throat. “Hello? What am I, invisible?”

They both scrunch up their faces in confusion, looking like they’re not sure if I’m certifiable or some kind group hallucination.

“That. That doesn’t make any sense,” Sam argues, “If she’s been with us this whole time, then why did all this happen? Why’s it all falling apart?”

“The Anon wasn’t lying. The tropes,” she rolls her eyes to display her exasperation, “I just can’t. You know? It’s like ‘Oh no. Another vampire or witch.’ Been there, done that. Things gotta get amped up a bit. So, here we are. We must rebuild Fanfiction.”

“But how? I don’t know what you need me to do!” I cry, the flood of emotion and nerves causing my voice to waver.

“You don’t need to do anything.”

“Then what? Tell us!” Sam roars at the woman emitting an ethereal, soft-lens glow.

The rumble returns, the laptop screen goes black for a split second, “Oh no, you have to hurry!”

“What do we have to do?” Sam’s voice softens again, concern lacing the low gravel sound of it.

“You have to give her a name! You’ve already chosen it, you just need to call it out!”

“But she’s the Reader Insert! For the sake of inclusiveness, we don’t know her name!”

Dean shakes his head and slices a hand through the air, “You know what? NO! None of this is real. This is all fanfiction bullshit.”

The world shakes around us again.

“Please, Dean! Sam! DO it! Do what you dream! Call. Out. My. Name!” I plead through tears.

When the laptop screen glitches again, the Empress of the Plot Device begins to beg on my behalf as well, “Call out her name, it can be anything! Call her Mary if you need to.”

“Ew! No,” Dean looks as though he’s been burned.

“Chanticlellenora!”

“What? What the fuck kind of name is that?”

“I don’t know, I’m giving you options, maybe you wanted something unique?”

Even though we’re surrounded by a void, it seems to be growing smaller around us, making panic rush through us all.

“Come on guys! Just say a fucking name!”

They turn to each other, giving the look I recognize at the “silent Winchester conversation” and a sense of relief eases my muscles. It’s clear by the look of determination they both wear as they turn to me.

“We got this.” Sam assures.

“Hell yes.” Dean agrees, a smirk picking up the corner of his mouth before he parts his lips to speak again.

“Yyuuuhhhnnnnuuhhhh.” He groans slowly, eyes wide.

“Dean! What the hell?” Sam scolds. “That’s not what we agreed on.” He pushes him out of the way.

“Yuhhnuhh.” He blurts, his shoulders twitching with shock at himself.

The Empress and I stare at them, unimpressed. “Seriously guys? You’re just vocalizing the y slash n thing.”

“Yuh-” Sam stops himself, “Look, I don’t think we can help it.”

“Try something else. Let’s loophole this.” I try to encourage them.

Sam and Dean confer, I hear them mumble places like Austin and Paris, then other spots like Brooklyn and India until they nod in agreement, Dean steps forward again.

“We got it.” He claps his hands together then opens them, palms up for the delivery. “Yyyyyyeeuhnuh.”

He rubs at his throat with a look on his face as though it betrayed him. “Why could we say it to each other, but not to her?”

“That’s because it’s not related to a place.”

“So no geographical names, I guess.”

Sam starts to call out random words Dean suggests that could pass as names - Lily, Sandy, Chandelier.

“Try Arrow!” Dean shouts.

The Empress and I do our best Winsync impression, sharing a stare of confusion. Sam tries every suggestion, but continues to spew out the same sound, just with different intonations.

“This isn’t working! What else can we do?”

I breathe out a heavy sigh, closing my eyes as I prepare myself for what I’m about to say. “You guys aren’t gonna like it.”

“Oh no. Nope nonono no.”

“But I think we should-”

“Don’t bring her into this,” Dean warns.

“-try to summon Nash.” I finish despite his warning. We end up caught in a staring contest as we will each other to give in. I suck in a breath, ready to call her, “Na-”

“Wait!” Sam interrupts.

“What now, Sam? We don’t have time for you to pore over the Lore!”

He looks to Plot Device, “What if we don’t give her a name?”

“You mean,” she gulps, “Not write it in second person?”

“Yeah,” he jumps at her like an excited puppy, “Exactly! We could give her a nickname or just be general when calling her name. It can be glossed over, can’t it?”

Plot Device scrunches her face in thought, bringing a perfectly manicured nail to tap on her lips as she does so. “I guess that could work. Is that what you wish?” She looks at me.

“Will fanfiction survive? Can it be rebuilt?”

“It can be anything you wish, though you still lack a name, you are without limits.”

“My limit does not exist,” I mumble. “That’s grool.”

“So grool,” she smiles.The ground stops shaking, the darkness begins to lighten, the gleaming paint of Baby shines in the distance and Dean swoons in relief. “Now, off with you. Go on and create new adventures. Subvert those tropes, surprise me. Surprise us all!” She waves us away like a parade float queen.

“We will,” we assure her, and turn to walk to the Impala, Dean drapes his arm over me. “Well, where do we go from here?”

“The only bar in town?” Sam suggests.

“That sounds about right. But after that...we’re changing things up.”

Dean squeezes my shoulder, “You got it. Now about that nickname, a lot of people seem to like it when I call them ‘Swee-’” I silence him with a slap to the face.

“I will call Nash, you know better.”

“Message received.” He lowers his head as he heads to open the creaky driver’s side door. “Is Yuhnnuh really that bad? It almost works…”

I death glare him. “Was the last time not enough for you? Who knows what else she could come up with. Oh, maybe you’ll willingly trade Baby for a minivan, or, no I got it, a Fiat. I should make notes…”

Random narrator that suddenly appears: The reader made many other requests and had many other amazing adventures before finally returning to the ordinary world. But that’s...another story.

Tags:

@mogaruke @feelmyroarrrr @kayteonline @notnaturalanahi @attractiverandomness @mrswhozeewhatsis @deathtonormalcy56 @kittenofdoomage @jpadjackles @supernatural-jackles @luci-in-leather @babypieandwhiskey @brewsthespirit-blog @mysaintsasinner @idreamofhazel @impala-dreamer @sis-tafics @littlegreenplasticsoldier @ultimatecin73 @mrsjohnsmith @bringmesomepie @sharingan-rasengan-chidori @mandilion76 @muliermalefici @doctorboo82 @boxywrites @essie1876 @sherrybaby14 @emmysthougts @sylverminx @someday-once @nostalgic-uncertainty @there-must-be-a-lock @carryonmyswansong @captain-amelia-bradley 

[itsawinwinthing]

Cell Block Tango  -  Sebastian Stan (Ch 2)

Pairing: Sebastian Stan x Original Female Character

Word count: 1066

A/N: If you want to be tagged please send me a message 

Warnings: slight anxiety, and running into a fridge ;)

_______________________________________________________________________

SEBASTIAN's P.O.V

"Seb, open the door!" A muffled voice shouted as it attempted to travel through the three walls that lead from my bathroom to the front door.

"Hold On! Coming!" I shouted, wrapping a towel loosely around my hips as I exited the bathroom, jogging into the kitchen, my toothbrush hanging from my mouth. I stopped at the sink to spit before going to the door. As I trotted my way over, I hooked my toe on the corner of the fridge projecting myself straight into the floor, letting a massive groan escape my lips.

"Seb! I lost the hide-a-key you gave me! Sebastian!" The person shouted again.

"Yeah, I'm coming," I sighed, readjusting the towel, as I reached for the doorknob.

"What the hell happened to you," Chris chuckled as he walked in and shut the door.

"I ran into the fridge," I chuckled, checking to make sure none of my toes were broken.

"Wait! is Robert Redford in your apartment?" Chris exclaimed, hopping off the couch looking around frantically, before flopping down on the couch clutching his chest.

"You're never going to let me live that down, are you? And why are you dressed so nice?" I stated, unsure why he was wearing a suit and tie.

"Never buddy," He grinned widely, "But hey come on, your agent told my agent who told me that they're going to Tisch to scout out the senior show for possible prospects tonight and want us to come and help them decide on one female and one male, they already gave me the tickets, that is why I am dressed like this," He explained, "You in?" He asked.

"You're going to drag me to the school that wouldn't accept me? Come on man," I said pitifully, trying to get a rise out my best friend.

"Dude! I know you were upset but please don't make me go alone!" He begged jovially.

"Alright, fine, give me a few minutes," I replied.

"You're the man Seb!" Chris shouted down the hallway.

. . .

Our agents snuck Chris and I through a side door after the lights had gone down in hope our presence would go undetected just long enough for the show to run its course and not take away from the actor's performances.

"They're putting on Chicago, those are some large shoes to fill," I leaned over to whisper to Chris as we took our seats.

"Yeah, but they always do amazing productions, this is where Elizabeth went," He responded.

"Ladies and gentlemen, please take your seats, the show is about to begin. We hope you enjoy Tisch School of The Arts senior production of Chicago," A man's voice reverberated through the speakers.

. . .

"And now, the six married murderesses of the Cook County Jail in their rendition of 'The Cell Block Tango'!" A young man said from the center stage, darting behind the curtains as the jazzy music flooded the theater and the curtain rose, revealing 6 lovely women wrapped around the faux doorframes on stage. The stage was illuminated in a deep crimson red, as the melodic voices of the woman touched the ears of the people captivated by their performance.

They were all phenomenal, but one, in particular, took me completely by surprise. Three of the girls had already gone through their parts and the music grew more soft and gentle as this girl stepped forward to her unknown male counterpart. She oozed with genuinety, her connection to the audience was raw and relatable, I didn't realize I understood what she was saying while she was talking until I made the connection. She was speaking in Romanian.

"Cum m-am găsit aici? Ei spun că iubitul meu celebru? Mi-a ținut jos soțul și i-am tăiat capul. Dar nu este adevarat. Sunt inocent. Nu știu de ce unchiul Sam spune că am făcut-o. Am încercat să explic la sectția de poliție, dar nu au înțeles," She weeped, the sorrow in her voice nearly broke my heart.

"Yeah, but did you do it?" One of the women asked.

"Uh-uh, Not. Guitly." She cried out as the song broke into an uproar.

My jaw fell slightly ajar as I grabbed my program, flipping through it, landing on the blonde woman before me.

- Nicola Dietrich as Ruxandra The Romanian ...

Nicola, who prefers to be called Cole, came to us from the hospitable state of Indiana, growing up in Indianapolis, with little experience in the Dramatic Arts but she has blossomed into one of our most hard-working, and creative actresses. She hopes that after she graduates she will be able to get into film and share her craft with others.

"When the show is over, help me find the blonde," I leaned over to Chris.

"I got your back buddy, don't sweat it," he whispered back.

. . .

NICOLA's P.O.V

The crowd roared with a monstrous applause and endless cheers, as loud as a commercial airliner taking off. My ears rang from the sheer level of volume as we stepped to the front of the stage taking our final bow on this theater stage.

As soon as the curtains closed the cast headed out to the foyer of the theater to wait for the audience members to come out and talk to us. I stood there for a moment across from my dear friend Izzy who was looking over to me giving me a big thumbs up.

People came through, shaking my hand, congratulating me, and talking to me about my experience at Tisch. An elderly couple had come to tell me how beautiful I was, and to rock my big girl body. It was incredibly sweet considering I was the biggest of the 6 Married Murderesses and I lost 25 pounds for the part. I was Ashley Graham beautiful. I turned towards the door and kissed the sweet old lady as the foyer fell silent.

I paused for a moment feeling a looming presence behind me. Suddenly realizing the silence of the atmosphere I turned around to see two tall gentlemen standing before me.

They weren't just any gentlemen though, these men were none other than Captain America himself, Chris Evans and The Winder Soldier, Sebastian Stan.

chapter 3

[clubpenguinkiller]

all my copypastas up to date

Copypastas You don’t have to be a parent to understand the horror of walking into a room to discover that the baby crawled out of his crib and onto that pottery wheel you forgot to turn off. And while the baby is spinning around and around, the dog is sitting there all calm, like a person, gently using his paws to fashion the baby’s soft cartilage head into something a little more modern. It might be the classic tale of bad parenting, but let’s see where the dog is going with this. somebody once trolled me, successfully rickroll’d me im not the sharpest n00b in the thread… just took another one of my signature “dust baths” it’s like a regular bath only i roll around in a bunch of dust and sand and start screaming when it gets in my mouth and eyes. anyway don’t trust the government Oh, purple-moustached clever Waluigi. Thou art such a genius when it is thy time to attack Mario and Luigi! How thou attach springs to thy shoes, know I not! Why dost thou not have thy own video fame? Art thou enraged that thou dost not have one? Why dost thou fight the Mario brothers? Thou art negative and wicked when shooting fireballs at thy green plumber, thy foe! Why art thou always cranky? Art thy purple knickers in a knot? Perchance Alvin Earthworm annoyed thou with his Youtube video. Why art thou so tall and slim? Perchance a Power Flower fell in you mouth when thou wast a baby. Why dost thou wear a purple suit? I like thy violet outfit for its unique hue. Shouldst thy brother Wario and thou fight so repeatedly? Is Bowser the Dragon-turtle you fiendish companion? I dost wonder what it wouldst be like to be friends with Bowser and thou. Dost thou own the Vicious Petey Piranha Flower? Dost thou like the kind Princess Peach? If thou couldst own a Yoshi wouldst thou? Thou art so sly and crafty our slippery Waluigi. Dost thou fight Geno the Explorer dangerously? Why art thou not in Super Smash Bros Brawl? Perchance thou art sad for being excluded from that rough game. Why art thou so nimble when thou escape the police? Thy symbol is an upside down L. Oh, thou art sneaky, secretive and tricky, mine own Waluigi! Ohhh my god. Ohhh ,y god. Ohhhhhhhhhhhhh THERE IT IS THERE IT IS. THERE IT IS. OH MY GOD. EAYEAYEYAYEAHEYAHEY EYAEAAAAAAA YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA YEAAAAAS. I FOOUND IT. I FOUND IT. I FOUND IT. I FOUND IT. YEAH. YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH. I FOUNDI IT FINALLY!!!!! YEAH!!!!! OH MY GOD. OH MY GOD I FINALLY FOUND IT. OH MY GODO. HOH MY GOD. I CAN'T BELIEVE IT. TAKE A LOOK AT HTIS EVERBODY. A LIVE SHINY PONYTA IN MY LEAF GREEN VERSION. I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS. I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS. I FINALLY GOT IT. OH MY GOD my heart is beating 100 miles per hour. i was listening to my favorite band once again. Sum 41. No Reason. Live in Ontario 2005. after 25968 encounters I HAVE FINALLY GOT IT OH My god corre al gol, lo va a patear yyyy GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOoOoOoOoOoOLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!!!!!!!!!! GOL GOL GOL GOL GOL GOL GOL GOL!!!!!……QUE GOLAZOOOOO!!!! *churns butter very quickly I hope my last words are "see you in hell" spoken to my grandchildren at age 99 right before I cut out my tongue and live another 401 years 私は究極のミームだ I love everything about you Boy, do I love chicken strips. Sometimes, when I’m home alone, I’ll take some chicken strips fresh out of the oven and rub them in my scalp. It doesn’t do much for my hair health, but I like the way they feel running through my strands of hair. The flakey coating, smooth white meat, and warmth. Yum. stuffing your face as usual. I gotta have a good meal Garfield, you fat cat. You are so big and fat. Why are you so fat? I eat, Jon. it’s what I do it’s time to kick odie of the table dont do it garfielf, that’s our pet dog odie you’re going into orbit, you stupid mutt GAAAAARRRFIIIELD!!! time for a nap. I’m a cat who loves to snooze (echoing) garfield you lazy cat I hate alram clocks I’m am hungry I want some lasaga you’re eating us out of house and home, GARMFIELD enough with The Chit Chat let’s get some grub going GRUB TIME… where Are the 3-cheese pizzas I ate those food where Are the tacos shells ? I ate those food where did all the hamburger helper go *brup* You’re such a bad kitty that’s it I’ve had it with you that does it I’m done that’s the last straw grarfileld Somebody once told me the world is gonna roll me I ain't the sharpest tool in the shed She was looking kind of dumb with her finger and her thumb In the shape of an "L" on her forehead Well, the years start coming and they don't stop coming Fed to the rules and I hit the ground running Didn't make sense not to live for fun Your brain gets smart but your head gets dumb So much to do so much to see So what's wrong with taking the back streets? You'll never know if you don't go You'll never shine if you don't glow [Chorus:] Hey now you're an All Star get your game on, go play Hey now you're a Rock Star get the show on get paid And all that glitters is gold Only shooting stars break the mold It's a cool place and they say it gets colder You're bundled up now but wait 'til you get older But the media men beg to differ Judging by the hole in the satellite picture The ice we skate is getting pretty thin The water's getting warm so you might as well swim My world's on fire. How about yours? That's the way I like it and I'll never get bored. [Chorus 2x] Somebody once asked could I spare some change for gas I need to get myself away from this place I said yep what a concept I could use a little fuel myself And we could all use a little change Well, the years start coming and they don't stop coming Fed to the rules and I hit the ground running Didn't make sense not to live for fun Your brain gets smart but your head gets dumb So much to do so much to see So what's wrong with taking the back streets You'll never know if you don't go You'll never shine if you don't glow. [Chorus] And all that glitters is gold Only shootin' stars break the mold http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=uU_eaXsPxOY "You'll never stop me!" I shout, running away. My body transforms into a small bee, and as I fly off, I turn around and shout, "You can't stop me! No one can stop me!!" I hit a glass door and fall to the floor. As I lay there, withering in pain as my small bee body dies a slow death, I whisper, "But I never said nothing could stop me." My body looses all movement as my lifeless corpse lays on the cold floor. A single tear runs down your cheek as you whisper, "Godspeed, honey man." HAPPY fourth of July! Hello! My name is Jeremy Frederick Wilson, but you can just call me… Bombittyboo! I know, yet again, I have not been dedicating, enough time to my vlog. However, today, I’ve created a new interpretive dance and poem routine! I hope this is the climax, the outcome, of all my creative juices, since my last interpretive dancing vide which was from over a year ago. Well anyway, this poem is in the format of an english sonet. I hope you really like it, and I hope you like it as much as me. Again, HAPPY fourth of July! I hope you all celebrate it carefully, and wisely! Well, here goes nothing! I hope you enjoy it! Oh so, so many years before today, our founding fathers with their many signatures, sculpted the greatest nation, as some say, one that too this day, still grows, and matures. This, our home. This, our country that we love. That we still celebrate, July fourth. The men who made us completely free of… British tyranny. Which reined south and north. Free from this! We join together in bliss. To honor all those, who came before us. But we do not just sit and reminisce. We look to the future, as we discuss. The bright prospects of our nation so dear. Which much proceed with strength, and lacking fear. Hey guys its Sam hi here with more tips for your everyday life, helping you out, bringing you wisdom. Hey im 27 I’ve been there I’ve done that I’ve been around the block. This next tip has to do with relationships. Love, romance, whatever you wanna call it. I’m gonna give you a surefire way to get her, your special someone, wrapped around your little finger. I mean they’re gonna be just.. Ooohh thinking about you all day. Here’s how you do it. You have to awaken the motherly instinct. You have to get your sweetie, your sweetie pie, to awaken her biological, uh, genetic motherly instinct. and it’s very easy to do. I’m gonna show you how to do it. Kay? You ready? Here we go. (gets on hands and knees) Mommy! Mommy! (smacking lips)Baby Sammy want milk! (slurping) Gimme milky! Mommy! Mooommy! Mommy mommy!! Mom! Mommy! Mommy Sammy want milk! (slurping) Baby Sammy hungry! Baby Sammy Hungry!! I want milk!! WAAAAAAH!! Gimme milky! Gimme milky! Gimme milk! Wah wah wah!! Baby want milky! Here comes the baby! Baby Sammy hungry! (crawling) Baby Sammy want milky! (approaching) Gimme milky!! Gimmy milk! Here I come! I want milk!! GIMME TIT MILK! GIMME TIT MILK!! BABY SAMMY WANT TIT MILK!! BABY SAMMY WANT TIT MILK!!! BABY SAMMY WANT TIT MILK NOW! GIMME THE TIT MILK OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯＯ I came here to have a good time but I’m honestly feeling so attacked right now. It’s a metaphor, see? You crave that mineral, but you don’t give it the power to have an extra hour with the ball pit. Oh sad frog, if only there was someone out there who loved you, but my anaconda don’t noot noot unless you talk dirty to me and make me squart across the room. Even if the girl kissed the boy, your fave is problematic – John Green is the zodiac killer, Luigi is giving the death stare, and it’s actually blood orange. Free him! Not all starter kits are for stealing her look, but sometimes you have to eat Lay’s chips during peach time and submerge unnecessary color palettes in bluespace, covering them in text posts for the aesthetic. I told my bae to come over because my parents aren’t home, but girls don’t like boys, they like the selfie olympics. the way they just [clenches fist] olympic all those selfies. According to the science side, “The average skeleton fights in war for 31 days” very factoid, much statistical error. The average skeleton fights in war for 0 days. Skeleton Georg, who uses tumblr pro, wears a fedora, and has fought in the skeleton war for all eternity, is an outlier and should not have been counted. You’ll never see the last meme of 2014 the way Garcia Lopez de Cardenas saw it, but that’s none of my business. Anyway, here’s Wonderwall. [Muffled Flappy Bird Music Plays in the Distance] neopets is honestly a horrifying and disturbing look into the faults of late capitalism and the unfettered exploitation inevitable in unregulated economic systems like first you have the ridiculous inflation rate caused by the ease of which you can generate new neopoints. it’s like the post-WWI germany thing—if you keep printing money, it loses its value. similarly, as people play games, play habitarium, use the stock market, (basically any way of earning neopoints that doesn’t involve rsing from the NPC shops) they’re not actually exchanging currency cyclically like economies rely on—they’re just making it out of thin air. 10,000 neopoints today was 1,000 neopoints a few years ago. even avatar items that have been around for a while have soared from 300k to 3 mil. inflation is further worsened by a few things. one is that there are very few neopoint sinks (only notable examples are the main shops, wishing well, paid dailies, and slots) and only ONE that works even remotely efficiently. they had the save the wheels neopoint sink a few years ago to try to combat the problem, which only fucked things up worse. in order to incite people to sink their neopoints, they offered prizes to people who donated a lot. but the prizes themselves, both during the event and after, just encouraged people to generate more neopoints to donate and get prizes. it’s also awful because kids don’t play neopets anymore. in a capitalist system there’s always relative poverty, but the poor are disappearing. do you want to play a game where anything worth doing costs more than you could ever dream of earning? how is an 8 year old going to learn how to restock draik eggs? poverty in neopia is earning, like, 33k a day, and richness is incomprehensibly huge. we’re talking billions, trillions. wealth disparity is huge with no regulatory system helping out the lowest tier, and the rich get richer with bigger interest, bigger stocks, and more wiggle room with auction sniping the supply/demand is so integral to everything you do, buy, or take part in. you have things like codestones that generally stay constant (in the 3-7k range, with some inflating 20-40% around war time when people are training more because hello demand!) and things like junk items that you think could NEVER inflate because the supply is so high suddenly inflating 1,000,000% or more in a day due to a site event. and the staff actually have NO IDEA how to fix it. save the wheels? fucked up. portal plot? hilarious. there are rules against hoarding items just to raise the price, but how do you control that? bread costs less than rotten tomato salads. if you earn 16k a day (about average if you’re casual) it would take you 59 years to save up for a dark faerie wand. hell will eventually be sucked into the vortex of neopets.com and we will all despair and i will be richer than all of you In ancient Greek mythology, Pygmalion was a highly accomplished Cypriot sculptor. Though skilled at imitating the human form, and well acquainted with it's subtleties, he became disgusted by it when he witnessed the Propoetides prostituting themselves. These women were punished by Venus for their lack of worship with a coarseness of skin and a crudeness of nature, and were then forced into prostitution. Seeing this, Pygmalion the sculptor was repelled and could no longer appreciate women. Seemingly alone, Pygmalion sought to create for himself a perfect, pure, unsullied companion. He used his particular skills to this end: he created a statue bride. What you are about to watch is a mysterious video. It's origin is attributed variously, and almost certainly spuriously, to various abstract artists or surrealists. The truth is that what we are seeing, and what we perceive to be strange and disturbing, is actually beauty to it's creator. Perhaps what we are viewing is the work of a modern Pygmalion. To him, her toneless voice, the paleness of her skin and the comparative vibrancy of her lips may indeed be the very embodiment of a perfect woman... Consider the mind-scape of the creator. In whose mind does this appear beautiful? In whose mind is this pure, near worshipful? Are we missing out on his perspective? Who are we to be afraid or to judge them? He may well love her fully, perhaps more fully than any of us could ever hope to be loved. In the mind of her creator, she is a near goddess; the perfect representation, not just of femininity, but the peak of human potential. A perfectly satisfactory being. How does that kind of unconditional love feel? Well, how does she feel? Fantastic. The "Swing Daddy" of the piano, Artie Antlers was one of the early cabaret characters at Pizza Time Theatre. Artie sang with a deep soulful voice, and his style of music ranged from boogie-woogie, to swing, to early Rock and Roll. He often referred to himself as "moose-ical" and also played up the moose theme by making quotes such as "this Moose is loose". Artie was used in the early 1980s, and was the final culmination of the characters of Elkton John and Glen Camel who were mentioned in the original 1977 PTT Program but never put into production. He was originally announced in 19793, and debuted during the first half of 1980. He originally appeared at three of the earliest Pizza Time Theatre locaions - San Jose (Kooser), Concord, and Sacramento, replacing Dolli Dimples in the Cabaret (then known as the Piano Bar Lounge). Artie Antlers was voiced by Jim Cunningham, a jazz artist whose band "The High Time Octet" had been written up in national papers. Jim was hired by the ad agency of Foote, Cone & Belding and flown from Denton, TX to do the recording at Wally Heider Studios in San Francisco. The piano player on the tracks was a man who played for the Pointer Sisters, and the entire recording session happpened over the course of only four days. Artie dressed in a flashy blue tux, and originally had a black nose which was later removed. Mechanically, Artie was identical to Dolli Dimples (minus the breast movement) – the duo can be seen together at the factory here. Shortly after his introduction, Artie required a retrofit for his antlers which were originally made of wood and broke easily. A styrofoam version was created that was more durable and did not break from the characters movements. During the very early 1980s, Artie was used widely on PTT merchandise, appearing in print on items such as calendars and annual reports. He was also featured on items such as the “Chuck E. Cheese Cube” and other redemption items. Despite his prominent exposure and usage, Artie was never given a second showtape - in 1982 when Dolli Dimples was renewed for a second tape, a new character was introduced named B.B. Bubbles instead of new material for Artie. Aspects of Artie Antlers were used in ideas for new retrofits, such as a Davy Crockett style retrofit for Artie, and a lumberjack character retrofit for The King, however neither materialized past the concept art stage. sweetie, you are literally so out of line it’s fucking unbelievable. i could drag you so hard right now but i know you’ll just end up crying. i’ve roasted you before and you know it. chances are you’ll just say i bullied you because you’re gay and have different skin. talk shit get hit, you don’t wanna mess with me kiddo; i’ve got a black belt. i know threats are fucked up but that’s all i’ve been receiving all day, probably from her royal hoodrat olive and all of her nasty friends. but you can gang up on me and make fun of me for being goth all you want. i’ve been hurt a lot. my first boyfriend cheated on me, my dad screams if i forget to do my chores, and there are some days i don’t even want to get out of bed in the mornings. i’m a jaded teenage girl. i’ve been through shit that you wouldn’t even dream of. you think your life is hard? try asking the cutest guy in your grade out in the middle of the cafeteria only to find out he has a fucking girlfriend. you don’t know my life or my story so keep my name out of your nasty mouth. life is a battlefield and it looks like i’ve already won. i’m a jaded teenage girl👸. i’ve been through shit💩that you wouldn’t even dream☁️🌜 of. you think💭 your life is hard?😁😣👿 try asking💬❓ the cutest😙😻 guy👱in your grade👦👱👧👩👸👲 out in the middle of the cafeteria🍔🍟🍕 only to find out😨 he has a fucking girlfriend👫💏💔. you don’t👎 know my life or my story📖📚 so keep my name👸 out of your nasty mouth👅💩. life is a battlefield💣🔫🔪 and it looks👀 like i’ve already won👌 👌👀👌👀👌👀👌👀👌👀 good shit go౦ԁ sHit👌 thats ✔ some good👌👌shit right👌👌th 👌 ere👌👌👌 right✔there ✔✔if i do ƽaү so my selｆ 💯 i say so 💯 thats what im talking about right there right there (chorus: ʳᶦᵍʰᵗ ᵗʰᵉʳᵉ) mMMMMᎷМ💯 👌👌 👌НO0ОଠＯOOＯOОଠଠOoooᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒ👌 👌👌 👌 💯 👌 👀 👀 👀 👌👌Good shit I AM GAY! GAY! GAY! I LOVE LONG BIG COCKS. I’M A SUPER SUPER GAY I LOVE LONG BIG COCKS. Now once again, I would like to make this very clear. I AM GAY! GAY! GAY! I LOVE LONG BIG COCKS. I’M A SUPER SUPER GAY I LOVE LONG BIG COCKS. Thank you for your attention and I hope for your support. Teru! Teruteru! Teru! Teruteru! Hana…Hanama….Hana, Hana, Hanamura. Teru! Teruteru! Teru! Teruteru! Hana…Hanama….Hana, Hana, Hanamura. Teru! Teru! Teruteru! Hana…Hanamura! Hanamura! Hanamura! He’s a cook. He’s a cooooook. He’s a cook, cook, cook. Hanamura! Teru! Teruteru! Teru! Teruteru! Teru. Teru. Teruteru! Teru. Teru. He’s the cook. He’s the cook at the Super High School Level. Cook! Cook! He’s a cook. Cook! Cook! Cook! Cook! Cook! It’s Teru! Teruteru! Teru! Teruteru! Hanamura! Hanamura! High School Level Cook! Cook! Cook! Cook! Cook! Cook! He’s kinda plump, plump and round. Flirts with everyone. (guys and girls) (guys and girls) (guys and girls) He flirts with them all. Flirts with them all. And he loves his mom! Mom! Mom, happy mommy’s day. Teru! Teruteru! Teru! Teruteru! Hanamura! Hanamura! He’s Super High School Level Cook! He’s the cook at Dangan Ronpa! Super Dangan Ronpa 2! Goodbye, goodbye, despair academy! Goodbye, goodbye, goodbye, say goodbye, say goodbye to despair! Des-des-despair academy! Academy on a tropical island. On a tropical island. Trop-trop-tropical island of hope and despair! Hope and despair, it’s Teruteru Hanamura. Hanamura. The cook at Super High School Level! Cook, cook, calls himself a chef. Cook, cook, calls himself a chef. At the highschool, at the highschool, super highschool, super highschool. Super Dangan Ronpa 2! 2! 2! 2! 2! It’s Teruteru Hanamura! Hanamura, he’s a cook. He’s a chef. He’s a cook who calls himself a chef. Chef, at the Super Highschool Level. Level! Level! Level! It’s Teruteru, Teruteru, Hanamuru. Teratera Hanamuru. He’s the cook, the cook, at the Super Highschool, Super Highschool, Super Highschool. I'M WITH STUPID (TRANSCRIPT) SpongeBob, Squidward and Patrick's houses are seen. Patrick's house is shaking. SpongeBob knocks on it. Every time he does it closes. He opens it himself. Patrick is cleaning frantically. He featherdusts SpongeBob] Patrick: NEED...FURNITURE! [makes a lamp post model out of the sand; he then makes a sand drawer, television, stool, and a couch. The whole time he is still frantically mumbling] SpongeBob: Patrick, what's with the home improvement? [Patrick barks like a dog and continues to clean]Hey, Patrick! Patrick: Oooooooh, sweep sweep!! SpongeBob: Patrick, I came over to see if you wanted to go jellyfishing. But I can see you're busy having an episode. Patrick: [Stops cleaning. his face turns mad] You know something, SpongeBob? It's just all fun and games for you. Nothing really matters. [imitates SpongeBob] "Oh, let's go jellyfishing! We don't have any work to do! Life is just a big bowl of fancy assorted cashews, and nobody has anything to dust or to clean or to wipe! Or fabricate!!!" SpongeBob: But, Patrick, the only thing I've ever seen you clean is your plate. Patrick: [Patrick snaps out of being angry and starts crying] I don't know what to do, SpongeBob. You gotta to help me! SpongeBob: [gasps] Patrick! You forgot how to eat again! Come on, we'll get the funnel. Patrick: No, it's not that, SpongeBob; it's worse. SpongeBob: Darn, I like the funnel. Well, what is it, then? Patrick: Look! [Takes out a rolled-up piece of paper from his belly button] SpongeBob: Hey, a note! [A sixteenth note is shown] Patrick: Yeah, but turn it over, there's a letter! [The letter B is shown] SpongeBob: You're right! Patrick: And, I got this message from my parents! [Hands out a smaller letter] SpongeBob: Your parents? [Reads the note out loud] "Dear Patrick, your mom and I are coming out tomorrow for Starfish Day. Please try to remember, but don't try too hard, or you'll hurt yourself like last time. Love, Daddy". Patrick: SpongeBob, my parents think I'm dumber than a sack of diapers. SpongeBob: No, they don't, Patrick. Parents just like to push your buttons. Like this! [pushes Patrick's nipples and his eyes elongate]Nauuugh! Patrick: [Laughing] That always cheers me up. [His eyes go back to normal] But not today. SpongeBob: Patrick, if your parents think you're dumb, then they must not know what dumb really is. Patrick: But don't they watch television? SpongeBob: That's what I'm saying, Pat! If your parents got to meet a real dummy, they'd realize what a genius you really are! Patrick: But don't geniuses live in a lamp? And besides, we don't know any dumb people. SpongeBob: Don't worry, Patrick! I'll be the dummy! When your parents see how dumb I act, they'll think you're the smartest guy ever! Patrick: Math is power! [Bubble transition to the next day. Patrick is in front of his mirror] Patrick: A, B, C, D, E, F, G... [Doorbell rings] Oh! H, I, J, K, L, M, N, O...! Janet: Should I get the bullhorn again, Marty? Patrick: W, X, Y and Z! [Marty doesn't realize the door has been opened and knocks on Patrick's head] Hi Mom, Hi Dad. Marty: Son! You recognized us this time! Patrick: Why wouldn't I recognize my own parents? Marty: You never were a bright one. [Patrick groans. Marty laughs] Well, aren't you gonna show us inside? Janet: He probably forgot where it is. Patrick: Well I know where it... Marty: Oh, let me lead the way so we don't get lost. [Patrick, Marty and Janet hold hands] Huh? Hold hands now! [Inside the house] Ok, we're almost there! Let go on three. One...two...three! [Marty and Janet let go of Patrick's hands on three] Janet: Good job! Marty and Janet: Pats for Patrick! [Both laugh as Patrick looks annoyed] Patrick: I'll go get the beverages. [Patrick leaves, then comes back with a tray with three drinks on it] Marty: Wow, son! You put the drinks in something this time! Ah, son, you must've been working all night to put these together for us. Janet and Marty: We love you! [Both kiss Patrick as he looks even more annoyed and groans] Patrick: [Doorbell rings] Hooray, the idiot's here! I mean, I'll get it! [Outside, SpongeBob is putting on his karate helmet] SpongeBob: Protective helmet, check. Gary: Meow. SpongeBob: I'm supposed to look stupid, Gary! Gary: Meow? [Goes back to SpongeBob's house] SpongeBob: What could go wrong? [Patrick's rock opens] Patrick: What a surprise! SpongeBob: Hi. Patrick: Mom, Dad, meet my neighbor, SpongeBob! SpongeBob: Hi. Marty: Hello there! Janet: How do you do? SpongeBob: Hi. [Walks to Patrick's parents] Marty: Put 'er there. [SpongeBob puts a doll on his hand] Doll: Mama! Mama! Patrick: He means "shake". [SpongeBob shakes his entire body]No, SpongeBob, no! Shake hands! [SpongeBob shakes both his hands]No, SpongeBob! Grab my dad's hand. [Puts both his hands and his left leg on Marty's hand] Grab it with only one hand! [Puts his left leg and hand down] Good boy! Now move your arm up and down! [He moves his shoulder up and down. Patrick giggles] Janet: So, SpongeBob. Do you live nearby? SpongeBob: Hi. Patrick: No, SpongeBob. Show them your house! [SpongeBob pulls up his pants and reveals a blouse]No, not your blouse! Your house! [SpongeBob screams and runs over to his house. He runs into the shell and gets stuck] Janet: He lives in a fruit? Marty: That's unhealthy. Patrick: [Giggling] Hey, SpongeBob! You wanna stay for dinner? [SpongeBob babbles like an idiot. Later, Patrick, Marty and Janet are watching television while eating TV dinners] Marty: Does he always do that after he eats? Patrick: Only on Wednesday. [Pan over to SpongeBob pushing his nose to reveal his underwear. When he lets go, his pants pull up by themselves. This is repeated a few times. SpongeBob makes an alarm sound after that. Patrick giggles] Marty: [Starts giggling with Patrick]Uh, Patrick, I think your friend might be broken. Patrick: Yeah. And it would take more than some masking tape to fix that guy. [SpongeBob balances on his nose while making a fire truck siren sound. Makes other various sounds] Marty: Whoa! Is he gonna be okay? Patrick: Oh, that's nothing. [Dolphin chirping] You should see him in the morning prancing around yelling "I'm ready! I'm ready! I'm rea!" [Rooster crows] He drives all the neighbors crazy! [Horn] Why, just the other day, our neighbor Squidward was--- [SpongeBob jumps backwards over Patrick, Janet and Marty while making an elephant trumpet sound, then he crashes on the floor]. ---was really no help for him. [SpongeBob makes imprints of himself on the walls while making horn sounds] I mean, look at the way he's dressed. Only somebody with holes drilled in their head would wear that stuff! And how about his shape! I mean, I've heard of barrel-chested, but never box-chested! [Janet, Marty and Patrick laugh. SpongeBob frowns]Hey, SpongeBob do you have any mascara I could borrow? [Makes his eyebrows sound like elastic rubber bands] Marty: [Chuckles] The boy wears make-up? Janet: What a card! [Everyone laughs, except SpongeBob, who's now very annoyed] SpongeBob: [Confused] Hey, Patrick! Patrick! Patrick: Aw, he said my name. Marty: Wow, how'd you train him to do that? [SpongeBob is mad. He bites Patrick's finger] Patrick: Ow! He bit me! SpongeBob: Patrick, meet me in the kitchen! Patrick: Oh, I guess the dummy wants to have a private conversation. [Janet and Marty laugh] A dumb one! [They laugh again, as SpongeBob and Patrick enter the kitchen] So, what's on your mind? Oh, wait, I already know the answer. Nothing! [Patrick laughs very hard] See, that's funny. 'Cause your dumb! SpongeBob: Patrick, could you let up on the insults just a little bit? Patrick: Oh, were those too complicated for you? I'll try dumbing them down a bit. SpongeBob: Patrick, I get the feeling that you think I really am dumb! [glances at Patrick's t-shirt, "I'M WITH THE DUMMY" with an arrow pointing towards SpongeBob] Patrick: That's just what I'd expect you to say. Dumb people are always blissfully unaware of how dumb they really are. [Patrick drools] SpongeBob: I'm only pretending to be dumb! It was our plan, remember! Patrick: Oh, SpongeBob, if only you could see how stupid you sound right now, with your talk of imaginary plans. Tell you what. You've caught me at a good mood. I'll humor you. Go on, go out there and act "smart" for everyone. SpongeBob: Ok, I will! [Takes off his helmet] Patrick: [Puts on helmet] And don't worry, I'll keep this warm for ya! SpongeBob: [In front of Janet and Marty, clears throat] I have a confession to make. I lied about being stupid. I just acted like a fool so you would appreciate Patrick a little bit more. I know how to talk, and eat, and do laundry. I even separate the darks from the lights. So what do you say we start over and try again? Hi! My name is SpongeBob SquarePants. And I am not a dummy. Marty: [laughs] Amazing! Three minutes in the kitchen and our son has taught him to talk in complete sentences. Oh, good work, son! Patrick: It wasn't easy, dad. SpongeBob: [sputtering] But... but, but, but, but, but, but... Janet: It looks like it's time for your next lesson, young man! SpongeBob: Now, listen to me! I'm not dumb! I have a brain! See, here's a picture of it! [He shows them a small picture of his brain] Patrick: That must be actual size. [All laugh] SpongeBob: No! It's normal size and fully functional, watch. [Writes on Patrick's chalkboard] 2 plus 2 equals 4. Marty: Hoho, son! You taught him math too! SpongeBob:Nooooooooooooooooooooooo!!! Marty: And you taught him to sing! [SpongeBob is blabbering and sputtering] Oh, now he's short-circuiting! You must have taught him a little too much. [SpongeBob imagines them all laughing hard. Marty and Janet look at each other and laugh; then they all do the can-can. He imagines the three popping out of SpongeBob's pores. SpongeBob is inside Janet, who is laughing, inside Marty, who is also laughing, inside Patrick, who is also laughing, inside his eye. SpongeBob screams and runs through the wall outside, running all the way back home] Marty: You know, son, I've always known that when it comes to brightness, well, you're about a three-watt. But this guy! He's a wet match in a dark cave. He makes phone operators seem smart! [clears his throat] But more importantly, son, he's shown me what a sharp, quick-witted boy you've become. [Hugs him] Ha! I feel like I'm really meeting you for the first time. Isn't that right, Janet? Janet: You bet, Marty! Patrick: [His eyes widen] Janet? Marty? Who are you people?! Janet: Marty! I'm scared! [Doorbell rings, then the rock opens up. Squidward, Herb and Margie are outside his rock] Squidward: Excuse me. Does this lovely couple belong to you? They've been standing outside my house saying "Where's Patrick?" all day! It's driving me nuts! Patrick: Mom! Dad! Herb: Wow, son! You actually recognized us this time. Margie: And you remembered to get dressed today! [Patrick, Herb and Margie laugh] Marty: Oh, that's right, honey. We don't have a son. Janet: Oh yeah! [Both walk away. Patrick and his parents laugh as their rock closes over them] 👀👀👍👍👍👀👀 nice 👌👌stuff 👀👀👀 ✔️thats some ™™™ nice 👨🏻 stuff 👨🏻👨🏻 ® (cool ) 👌👌👌👌👌 niiiiiiiiiii👌ce 👀👌👀👌👀👌👀👌👀👌👀👌 stuff that is some nice ✔️ass✔️stuff👀 ya got there ✔️ congrats 🎉 on the nice👍👍👍STUFF👍👍👌✔️👀✔️👀 👍👍 👀✔️™ nice 👌 shut the FUCK up 👎👀👎👀👎👀👎👀👎👀 bull SHIT bülł sHit 👎 thats 🚫 some bull shit👎👎 right👎👎th 👎ere👎👎👎right🚫there 🚫🚫if i do say so my self❌ i say so❌ thats fucking horrible right there right there (chorus: ʳᶦᵍʰᵗ fucking ᵗʰᵉʳᵉ) UGHHHHH❌ 👎👎 👎B0ОଠＯOOOОଠଠOoooᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒ👎👎👎 👎 ❌ 👎 👀 👀 👀 👎👎BAD SHIT DO IT, just DO IT! Don't let your dreams be dreams. Yesterday, you said tomorrow. So just. DO IT! Make. your dreams. COME TRUE! Just... do it! Some people dream of success, while you're gonna wake up and work HARD at it! NOTHING IS IMPOSSIBLE!You should get to the point where anyone else would quit, and you're not gonna stop there. NO! What are you waiting for? ... DO IT! Just... DO IT! Yes you can! Just do it! If you're tired of starting over, stop. giving. up. >le maymay arrow is this a le new epic meme? screen kapped for dat sweet karma xD. FUS ROH DAH!!!!!1 i used to be a christmas but then i took an arrow 2 da knee :^( BAZINGA BAZINGA ZIMBABWE. top kek, toppest of keks. le nyan cat? hahahaha le mayonaise. fucking epic ass meme i love that fucking meme so much man wait let me just *gets crack pipe out* smoke some of that good 420 shit :) *rips a bong* AHHHHHHHHH YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! that sure hit the spot ok now repeat that fucking epic ass M E M E WHATA FUCK MAN xD i just fall of my chair cuz i couldnt and i CANT stop laughXXXXXX DDDDDD OMGOSH DDDDD XXXXX DDDDD DDDDDD LOOOOOOOLLLLL FUCKIN HOLY SHITTTT I CANT JUST STOP LAUGHING CAUSE HE HE HE HE HE JUST TO FUNNY MAN!!!1!11! GOOD MEME SORRY I MEAN GREAT MEME EPIC MEMEING /b/ro BAZINGA BAZINGA BAZINGAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA ZIMBABWE is this a le new epic meme? screen kapped for dat sweet karma xD. FUS ROH DAH!!!!!1 i used to be a christmas but then i took an arrow 2 da knee :^( BAZINGA BAZINGA ZIMBABWE. top kek, toppest of keks. le nyan cat? hahahaha le mayonaise. fucking epic ass meme i love that fucking meme so much man wait let me just gets crack pipe out smoke some of that good 420 shit :) rips a bong AHHHHHHHHH YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! that sure hit the spot ok now repeat that fucking epic ass M E M E I'm Squirting Pure Mio Water Flavoring Into My Mouth And Walking Around With Swiffer WetJets Taped To My Shoes I Don't Give A Fuck Damn About Society You Know What? I'm Going To Write A Song About How Bad I Want To Fight You, And Once It Makes A Lot Of Money, I'm Going To Buy A Plane Ticket And Come To Your House And I'm Going To Break All Of Your Electronic Devices, You God Damn Pincushion. Okay, first of all, FUCK your fandom and FUCK your bullshit fandom politics. I know you’re not going to like this but I don’t care and before you start thinking about flaming me my ask box has anonymous off so you’re going to listen to what I have to say. Monica would be a firebender, I think that’s one thing we all agree on. Now is where you’re going to hate me. Phoebe and Joey would both be airbenders. Now before you start flipping a shit let me just say this: go fuck yourself. Ross would be an earthbender and Rachel would be a waterbender. I KNOW THIS INTERFERES WITH THE SHIP. I DON’T CARE, FUCK YOUR SHIP AND FUCK YOU. And Chandler? Chandler would be a nonbender. I know it hurts but it’s true. I have watched every episode of the show and all of his actions lead me to believe the creators envisioned him as a nonbender from the start. Disagree? FUCK YOU. What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re fucking dead, kiddo. hi every1 im new!!!!!!! holds up spork my name is katy but u can call me t3h PeNgU1N oF d00m!!!!!!!! lol…as u can see im very random!!!! thats why i came here, 2 meet random ppl like me _… im 13 years old (im mature 4 my age tho!!) i like 2 watch invader zim w/ my girlfreind (im bi if u dont like it deal w/it) its our favorite tv show!!! bcuz its SOOOO random!!!! shes random 2 of course but i want 2 meet more random ppl =) like they say the more the merrier!!!! lol…neways i hope 2 make alot of freinds here so give me lots of commentses!!!! DOOOOOMMMM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! <--- me bein random again _^ hehe…toodles!!!!! love and waffles, Getting salt from gamer boys in my inbox. Listen up turd turrets, I WANTED to just play video games, I WANTED to just have fun, I NEVER wanted my gaming to be political or a struggle, I just wanted to play. But you wouldn’t fucking let me, you brought up my gender, you judged me based on it, YOU made it political. So now I WILL wreck everything with my fucking feminism, I am the feminist nightmare you fucking created. Witness me. you guys we gotta hurry i just got back from walmart theyre selling nintendo 3DS systems for $149.99 on sale plus every time you buy one you get a $50 gift card brings the total price down to $110 after tax NOW LISTEN we can flip those sons of bitches for 230 bucks a piece EASY they’re all limited edition zelda ones! HURRY hurry come with me! We can be rich and also i’ll get to keep one and we can play NINTENDO GAMES nintendo give me free stuff 14 years ago ⬅️📅today⬇️, the episode 📺✨”Band Geeks”✨📯🏉🇺🇸🎸🎷🎺🎤 of spongebob🌕▫️🐙🐚🐳 👔👖🍔🍟 squarepants came out😱📡. Our hero spongebob 🌕👔◽️👖 and his squad 🐙🐞🐚🐠🐟🐬🐳🍁 valiantly turnt up 🎉💥🔥💃 the bikini bottom bubble bowl 👙💘💭🍜🏉. Send 📲 this to 1⃣4⃣ other band geeks 👓👔. if u get 5⃣ back⬅️😄, it’s sweet 🍦🍩 sweet 🎂🍪 sweet 🍫🍭 victory 🎉🎊🎆 . If u get 0⃣😩 you are a #squilliam 🐙💢👎😰 Bring Tooth Ghost Pipe Hell Tooth Man To School With You. You Have No Other Choice. Bring Him. Feed Him Lies. He Will Crush The Nonbelievers. Listen To His Voice, Do You Hear His Song, O? Does He Cry? No. He Is Laughing. He Is Only Laughing. His Voice Is Fire. His Laugh Is Thunder. His Existence Is Forever. Fear Him. Love Him. He Is In Us all. Believe. Believe. Believe My OCHIN is gigantic, O.T.N is it's abbreviation It is mainly handled with things such as △○□× it serves combined use for men and woman Recently, a portable style that disassembles became possible All kinds of OCHIN have come into circulation Remove the portable-type OCHIN, so there aren't a lot of lost cases I advise you keep the lock nice and tight Furthermore, be careful because OCHIN as a so-called sex symbol is completely different Again, the above text is completely appropriate I actually met Guy Fieri at a restaurant once - we’d accidentally been given his table. Apparently he was fond of the restaurant and had a specific table he liked, and the management had messed up and gotten their days wrong, (it was Tuesday and they thought he was coming on Thursday or something like that). Anyway, the manager, completely embarrassed (this is a pretty nice restaurant) comes by and says “I’m so sorry, but we’d like to move you to another table if you could be troubled, and we’ll gladly compensate you for the cost of the meal and any other meal you’d like while you’re in town.” My sister and cousin were both like “Yeah that’s cool.” and I kind of played the asshole a bit. “I’m sorry, I just don’t understand. We’ve been here for 15 minutes - we’ve just ordered. Can’t we finish our meal here?” Then out of nowhere Guy Fieri shows up next to the manager and says “Paul, these guys can finish. We’ll be at the bar. I got some time.” And I (being a big Diners, Drive-Ins, and Dives fan) said “Oh wow, uh… I had no idea. Please feel free to give them the table.” Guy was grateful, shook my hand and said thanks, then gave me a card with his number on it and told me to give him a call later. After working up the nerve, I gave him a call that night, and to make a long story short, we had a glorious 11 month love affair, man on man, that I shall never forget. Our bodies intertwined as one, and from the beauty of Morocco, to the French Riviera, to the snorkeling in the Galopagos, Guy Fieri and I made glorious gay love to each other on six of the seven continents. Our MURDERCUBE, who art intangible,
hollow-pointed be your name.
Thy kingdom come,
Thine will be Gun,
on earth, as it is in /k/
Give us this day our daily Nugget,
and forgive us our 9mm vs .45 threads,
as we also have forgiven our Nogunz brethren.
And lead us not into Taurus,
but deliver us from Kimber.
For thine is the ‘PING!’-gun,
The Mauser,
and the Glory
Forever, and ever
Amen Ave Nex Alea; War is the way of Man; Man is the means of war; the Murder/k/ube allows us war; our worship is our readiness. Saluto Nex Alea. You know who/what is “on fleek?” Jesus. My Savior. My Love. My Ultimate Hero. Jesus is on fleek. The Catholic Church is on fleek. It is on point. It points us to our True North – Heaven – Jesus. Our Blessed Mother is on fleek. She is on point. Her ultimate job is to bring us to her Son – Our Savior – Our Love – Our Ultimate Hero. Thinking of the slang, “on fleek,” I started to think about as a working Catholic wife and mom, what things are on fleek in my life. I came up with a top 5: 1. Father. Son. Holy Spirit. They are on fleek. 2. My Family. So extremely grateful to be the wife and mom in my family. Straight up on point. 3. My job. Even with some of the difficulties I have balancing it with being a momma, I am extremely GRATEFUL to the Lord that He has entrusted me with this responsibility. Definitely leading to my holiness – so, yes, on fleek. 4. The faith community to which we belong. First, the Catholic faith in general – 2000 years old. So on fleek. Then, the particular parish we belong to – St. John the Baptist Catholic Church in Brusly, Louisiana. It’s a small little Cajun town right outside of Baton Rouge. The people are real, filled with love, and completely community centered. On Fleek. 5. The Saints. Those who have gone before us, filled with the Holy Spirit, the faith, and an incredibly awesome love of Christ and His precepts. They are like my “on fleek” gang of intercessors! On point, on point, on point. Мы начинаем наше космическое путешествие в те времена, когда трава была зеленее и музыка прекраснее, когда еще не было плохой музыки, дабы вернуть давно утерянную формулу хорошей музыки. Рассекая пространство и время, мы слышим звуки божественной музыки, в которой каждая нота находится на своем месте. Кажется нечто подобное испытывают люди когда слушают альбомы Sigur Ros, некое блаженное чувтсво. Это состояние невозможно описать, трудно уловить и легко потерять, но удивительно, на всем протяжении нашего путешествия оно все усиливается и усиливается. В окне иллюминатора пролетают все самые значимые музыкальные и исторические вехи в истории. Важна уже не конечная точка прибытия, а само путешествие, потому что стремление - вот самое главное в нашей жизни, достигнув определенной точки нам обязательно захочется продолжить путешествие дальше. Честно говоря я уже не знаю где мы находимся, достигли мы того самого места? И где это место? Скорее всего мы улетели намного дальше, за пределы пространства времени. Неужели мы так и не нашли формулы? неужели все напрасно? Наше путешествие - вот та самая формула, точнее одна из ее композиций, собранная из обрывков воспоминаний. Вычислить ее невозможно, но нам крупно повезло и мы стали редкими счастливчиками которым открылась одна из идеальных музыкальных композиций. Сможем ли мы когда-нибудь повторить это путешествие… возможно не скоро, но когда-нибудь обязательно, а пока нужно вернуться на землю и передать человечеству данные собранные нашими датчиками. Мы не настолько умны чтобы из полученных данных вычислить формулу, но зато у нас появилась одна из композиций сгенерированных этой идеальной формулой. Так правильно, ведь если бы человечество обладало “ключем” ни к чему хорошему это не привело бы. My baby he don't talk sweet, He ain't got much to say But he loves me loves me loves me, I know that he loves me anyway And maybe he don't dress fine, But I don't really mind 'Cause every time he pulls me near, I just want to cheer Let's hear it for the boy Let's give the boy a hand Let's hear it for my baby, You know you gotta understand Oh, maybe he's no Romeo, But he's my lovin' one man show Whoa whoa whoa whoa Let's hear it for the boy My baby may not be rich, He's watchin' every dime But he loves me loves me loves me, We always have a real good time And maybe he sings off key, But that's alright by me, yeah 'Cause what he does he does so well, Makes me wanna yell Let's hear it for the boy Oh, let's give the boy a hand Let's hear it for my baby, You know you gotta understand Oh, maybe he's no Romeo, But he's my lovin' one man show Whoa whoa whoa whoa Let's hear it for the boy 'Cause every time he pulls me near, I just want to cheer Let's hear it for the boy Oh, let's give the boy a hand Let's hear it for my baby, You know you gotta understand Oh, maybe he's no Romeo, But he's my lovin' one man show Whoa whoa whoa whoa Let's hear it for the boy Let's hear it for my man (Let's hear it for my babe) Let's hear it my man (Let's hear it for the boy) (Let's hear it for my babe) (Let's hear it for the boy) Let's hear it for my man (Let's hear it for my babe) (Let's hear it for the boy) Pull yourself together (Let's hear it for my babe) (Let's hear it for the boy) Whoa let's hear it for my boy (Let's hear it for my babe) Let's hear it for my man (Let's hear it for the boy) (Let's hear it for my babe) Let's it for my man There lived a certain man in Russia long ago He was big and strong, in his eyes a flaming glow Most people looked at him with terror and with fear But to Moscow chicks he was such a lovely dear He could preach the bible like a preacher Full of ecstacy and fire But he also was the kind of teacher Women would desire RA RA RASPUTIN Lover of the Russian queen There was a cat that really was gone RA RA RASPUTIN Russia's greatest love machine It was a shame how he carried on He ruled the Russian land and never mind the Czar But the kasachok he danced really wunderbar In all affairs of state he was the man to please But he was real great when he had a girl to squeeze For the queen he was no wheeler dealer Though she'd heard the things he'd done She believed he was a holy healer Who would heal her son RA RA RASPUTIN Lover of the Russian queen There was a cat that really was gone RA RA RASPUTIN Russia's greatest love machine It was a shame how he carried on [Spoken:] But when his drinking and lusting and his hunger for power became known to more and more people, the demands to do something about this outrageous man became louder and louder. "This man's just got to go!" declared his enemies But the ladies begged "Don't you try to do it, please" No doubt this Rasputin had lots of hidden charms Though he was a brute they just fell into his arms Then one night some men of higher standing Set a trap, they're not to blame "Come to visit us" they kept demanding And he really came RA RA RASPUTIN Lover of the Russian queen They put some poison into his wine RA RA RASPUTIN Russia's greatest love machine He drank it all and he said "I feel fine" RA RA RASPUTIN Lover of the Russian queen They didn't quit, they wanted his head RA RA RASPUTIN Russia's greatest love machine And so they shot him till he was dead [Spoken:] Oh, those Russians... I had this friend who used to brag to us all the time that he could catch his cum in his mouth without fail every time he masturbated. He actually wrote down how many times he successfully did it. 327. I’ll never forget that number. And every day at school, he would talk about this. It was always during lunch my sophomore year of high school, too..so it was extremely unnecessary. He used to always try to demonstrate his techniques with packets of mayonnaise but we’d always threaten to move tables so he’d stop. He was really one of those people who needed attention constantly. Aside from those times at lunch, he was a completely normal dude. Like…even after class we’d ask him about that stuff and be like “dude, what was with that cum stuff at lunch,” and he’d always look at us like we were crazy and say “what the hell are you talking about?” I’ll never forget that classmate. His great personality will always be remember but his perplexing obsession with catching his own ejaculate in his mouth will live on forever at my previous high school. He was a one of a kind guy. His name was Norman Reedus. Don't u ever ever fucken send me any thing like this again. U r so ignored. U will be so sorry one day. But u don't even know it yet. That pride of yours u think u know everything but u know shit. Your have really pissed me off. One day u will say. Wow Mom was right but it will be to late for u then. Fucken no all. I will not help u with ur hair or anything else so done ask!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I want to throw u out off my property. You r the most disrespectful little bitch I know. Don't ever disrespect my 'Lord' to me again. U and Chris will be able to talk to each other in Hell. Hey nightcore-ers. This is Mod Angel. Recently I have gone through a complete change of lifestyle and want to be referred to Mod Priscilla Valkyrie the Fallen Angel. Anyways, I’ve decided that nightcore isn’t enough so I will also be posting breakcore and dubstep remixes that sound nightcorey Yep. This right here is probably one of the best things I've ever heard. Honestly, it is. Every song i listen to now in my waking moments is nightcore remixes, full albums especially but its hard to find mixes for them all so sometimes i speed things up myself, I admit, because I just really like it so much better when its sped up 3000x. I usually do it in my offtime and it also helps me be more creative and inventive in my musical style as an artist. It really adds something different to the music and makes it so much better. So yeah. That's my two cents as a proud nightcore listener/artist

[shitkpopmemes-blog]

Hidden

I honestly couldn’t think of a better title. Guess who got another Bucky x Reader fic because i’m trash. There are more coming very soon. I’ve had a creative spark and I have tons of ideas for avengers stuff especially for Bucky. So Enjoy.

Warnings: mentions of childhood abuse, violence, swearing.

 Working with the avengers was amazing, but sometimes they were walking eggshells around you. They saw you as just an agent and nothing more, and yes it was frustrating at times but you just had to smile through gritted teeth because you were afraid. They knew you had a rough childhood but they didn’t know the details. Ever since you were born you had these powers, sort of like Scarlett witch, but the doctors had told your parents that it was from a mutation in your father’s blood. You never knew him; he had walked out the door before he even knew you existed but you guess he had powers similar. Your mum hated them because she hated him. She couldn’t bear to see you grow up like him so she locked you in your room most nights while she drank away her cares.

It was always the same until she got violent. You went to school with bruises and broken teeth but couldn’t tell anyone the truth, what would you say. You couldn’t say your mum hit you because then you would be taken away and she was all you had, but you also couldn’t say it was because of your powers because then everyone would know you were a freak. That’s what she called you, a monster and a freak. When you were 14 you got yourself out after what felt like decades of torture but found yourself on the streets. Somehow the day you had gotten out you had ended up on Hydra’s doorstep.

You were passed out when they took you in but they never knew about your powers or your mother, only that you had been kicked out. Now you had been with the avengers for almost 5 months after just being an agent for almost a year thanks to Tony who got you out on a mission. You had been on a few missions but nothing too big because they were worried for your safety. They knew you could hold your own, you had even beaten Bucky at sparing a few times, but with no power that they knew of and limited weapons knowledge they didn’t want to risk your life. That was until now.

You had woken up to everyone rushing around the tower. “Hey what’s going on?” you questioned Steve as he rushed passed you, “Suit up, we need all hands on deck Y/N.” You didn’t need here anymore detail, if you were needed you were there. A few moments later you found yourself in the situation you were now, sat on the quinjet in between Steve and Bucky as they prepped everyone for what they needed to do. “Nat and Clint clear the area; we want all civilians out of the way before anything goes down. Bruce and Thor you’ll be our eyes from buildings. You clear out people and take out any threats from there. Wanda and I have the enemies on the ground. Tony and Sam have our eye in the sky and, Bucky and Y/N take the ground but look out for our main target, if HYDRA is anywhere I want to know about it okay? Let’s go.”

You all separated from the jet and got to work. Bucky led you down a back alley into an opening by a cafe where there were customers everywhere. This wasn’t good. “Nat? Clint? We got a field trip happening over here. Cafe just round the block from you filled with civilians.” Bucky said through the comms. Before either of them could reply a projectile was fired at the sign and it crashed down to the ground in front of you earning screams from the people inside. “Y/N get them out of here now!” Bucky shouted going to take down the attacker. You ran into the cafe, “Hello! I don’t have time to explain but is there a back door?” The owner nodded and you quickly got everyone to exit the cafe and Clint was out the back guarding as people piled into the jet for safety. Once everyone was out of the way you went back to find Bucky but couldn’t see him anywhere. You started to panic for his safety. “Bucky?” You shouted but all you heard were grunts and groans coming from around the corner of the cafe. When you turned around you saw him swing the final guy to the ground into the pile with the rest.

“Crap” you whispered as you noticed the familiar logo on the shoulder on the person’s uniform. HYDRA. It was a logo you couldn’t mistake, “Steve? They are here.” You said through your ear piece, “Where’s Bucky?” He said back, “I’ve got him he is fine.” But that was when you were roughly thrown from where you were. Your ear piece flew out and broke under a strangers foot but before you could do anything two big men had you arms pinned behind you and Bucky the same. A man in all black came up towards you, the smell of smoke on his breath. “I waited many years for this moment Y/N.” He whispered to you and your eyes went wide, how did he know your name? “Don’t you recognise your old man?” he said with a disgusting smirk on his lips as he punches you right in the jaw. Your head swung back and you could hear Bucky straining to try and help you. The man who called himself your father grabs hold of your cheeks harshly, “Got any last words for me?” He grumbled and you spat some blood in his face and whispered, “You should have thought about the legs.” He looked mildly confused but before he could even think about your knee came into contact with his crotch. As he bent down you took the opportunity to kick him in the face and he fell backwards.

The two men holding onto you tried to tighten their grips but you jammed you heels into their toes making them let go. You swiftly knocked both of them out before running into one of the ones holding onto Bucky and knocking them out as well. “Let’s get out of here.” Bucky said grabbing you hand and running. You didn’t get very far before you turned a corner only to run into more hydra agents, you turned around again but found yourselves surrounded by them. They slowly got closer before you realised one was holding a book, a small red book with a black book. “Shit” You whispered as the agent opened it up ready to read. You questioned what to do, if the winter soldier in Bucky came out there was no way you could hold him back and you no way of telling the team. You knew what you had to do but you weren’t sure if you were ready. It had been years since you had used your powers and you weren’t ready for the team to find out but it was life or death.

Before you could fully register what you were doing you had entered Bucky’s head and began draining out all sound. You knew if Bucky’s head couldn’t hear the trigger words they wouldn’t activate the soldier in him. Once the agent had finished reading them you exited Bucky’s mind. “Soldier?” the agent said ready for Bucky to fall to their mercy but he didn’t. He was extremely confused and Bucky looked at you and you just nodded and moved to stand back to back with him assessing how many agents you were dealing with. Bucky wasn’t sure how the words hadn’t affected him but he didn’t care at that point. You saw that you were both out of ammo, “Steve we are surrounded and out of ammo. There is nearly a thousand hydra agents here and my arm isn’t going to get us through.” You didn’t here Steve’s reply but you could feel you power filling you up with adrenalin. “Bucky. Duck.” Was all you said and he was extremely confused but obeyed anyway. You did a 360 looking at all the agents looking at you. “Give me a boost.” You whispered as you felt the black clouds form at the end of your fingertips. Bucky placed his hands together ready for you to jump from. You planted one foot in his hands and did a back flip away from him until your hand came into contact with the floor sending vines of darkness through the ground, sending the agents flying.

You slowly stood up not being able to look into Bucky’s eyes, you waited for him to hit you or yell like your mum used to but he didn’t. He just stood up with eyes wide as you turned to walk away he grabbed your arm causing you to flinch. When you finally faced him he saw the tears threatening to fall down your cheeks. You were shocked when he just pulled you into his chest, his heartbeat was clear as bells in your ear and you let out a small sob. You weren’t sure why you were crying; maybe it was because you could be free once this was over of because Bucky was just holding you instead of hurting you like your mother used to do. He pulled you away as looked straight into your eyes, “I thought you were going to get yourself killed.” He said breathing heavily tears almost forming in his ocean blue eyes, “I thought they were going to take me away from you. Was it you who stopped them?” He just questioned and you silently nodded as a tear ran down Bucky’s face but a smile was placed on his lips.

“You’re not mad or scared?” you whispered and he just looked at you and shook his head, biting his lip, “I’ve been tortured and brainwashed Y/N, It takes a lot more than some powers like that to scare me. It would have been nice to have known beforehand but that’s okay.” He said placing his forehead to yours and laughed “I honestly think I love you.” He whispered and you just looked at him, “um that’s, i-i mean” but before he could finish you just pressed your lips to his. He began to deepen the kiss but you pulled away when you heard Tony land behind you letting off a flare, “Thank fucking god, finally.” He said, “Nat you owe my 20 bucks.” We just laughed at him and apologised. “Well while you two were busy we finished up so we can go back to the tower.” Bucky took your hand and you walked back to the jet.

When we got back he took me to the training room and just sat on a chair. “What are we doing?” I said laughing at him as he sat crossed legged staring at me “I want to know what you can do.” He said with a smirk. You just lift up your arms letting the power do its thing. You were finally able to be confident with what you could do because Bucky made sure you knew that you weren’t a freak or a monster. You were everything he wanted and that was good enough for you.

[turnoftherogue]

The Pool of Tears Part 2

Lacey's head swam, consumed by the black she faded in and out of consciousness. "Lacey!" She heard someone calling her name and latched onto that trying to pull herself out of the darkness. "Lacey!" She gingerly opened her eyes and grimaced at the light, shutting them again. "Are you OK?" She nodded and slowly opened her eyes again. She looked around and found herself on a gurney in a hospital. "How are you feeling?" She looked up and saw Dean standing over her. "I'm Ok. Head hurts a little, she caught me by surprise." She said as she swung her legs over the edge and sat up. "You seem to be feeling better." She turned her head and saw a doctor heading towards them. "Yeah I'm fine." she replied with a small smile. "Well let me check you over make sure there's no lasting damage and then you should be free to go." The doctor shined a light in her eyes and made other checks before signing her off. "We have to get out of here." Dean said as he took hold of her elbow and escorted her out to the parking lot where Sam was waiting by the car. "What happened to Bobby?" Lacey asked worriedly. "They're operating on him now. There's nothing more we can do here. We have to get to the sword. The demons heard where it is, we have to get to it before them. Can you take us to New York?" Lacey blinked at him. "I suppose so. Do you have the address?" Dean handed her the card with the storage lock ups name on it. "OK" She said. "Hold on to my arms and don't let go." Sam grabbed some guns out of the car and passed one to Dean. They both took hold of one of Laceys arms. She focused on the address and moments later they were standing outside the lockup. The boys entered the lock up, their guns drawn and Lacey followed in behind them. The bodies of dead demons were splayed out across the floor. Dean nudged one of them with his foot. "So I see you told the demons where the sword is." They snapped around to see Zachariah and two other angels standing behind them. "Oh thank god, the angels are here." Dean muttered. "And to think they could have grabbed it any time they wanted. It was right in front of them ." "What do you mean?" Sam asked. "We may have planted that particular piece of prophecy inside Chucks skull, but it happened to be true. We did lose the Michael sword. We truly couldn't find it. Until now. You've just hand delivered it to us." "We don't have anything." Dean told him. "It's you, chucklehead. You're the Michael sword." Dean stared at him. "What you thought you could actually kill Lucifer? You simpering wad of insecurity and self loathing? No. You're just a human Dean. And not much of one." "What do you mean I'm the sword?" "You're Michael's weapon or rather his receptacle." "I'm a vessel?" Dean asked incredulously. "You're THE vessel. Michael's vessel." "How? Why me?" Dean asked. "Because you're chosen. It's a great honour Dean." "Oh yeah life as an angel condom. That's real fun. I think I'll pass." Dean spat. "Joking, always joking. Well no more jokes." Zachariah glared at him before raising a hand and pointing it, gun like at Dean. Suddenly he swung his hand around to point at Sam instead. "Bang." There was a loud crunching sound and Sam fell to the ground, his legs broken. "God!" Sam yelled. "You son of a bitch!" Dean shouted. Lacey rushed over to Sam, kneeling down beside him. She laid a hand over each of his legs and Sam felt a warmth spread through them. She helped Sam back up to his feet. "Keep mouthing off and I will break more than his legs. I am completely and utterly through screwing around. The war has begun. We don't have our general. That's bad. Now Michael is going to take his vessel and lead the final charge against the adversary. You understand me?" Zachariah spat. "How many humans die in the crossfire huh? A million? Five? Ten?" "Probably more. If Lucifer goes unchecked you know how many die? All of them. He'll roast the planet alive." "There's a reason you're telling me this instead of just nabbing me. You need my consent. Michael needs my say so to ride around in my skin." Dean said knowing he had the angel at that. "Unfortunately yes." Zachariah nodded. "Well there's got to be another way." "There is no other way. There must be a battle. Michael must defeat the serpent. It is written." The angel fumed. "Yeah, maybe. But on the other hand…Eat me. The answers no." Dean replied. "Okay how about this? Your friend Bobby, we know he's gravely injured. Say yes and we'll heal him. Say no, he'll never walk again." Zachariah bargained. "No." Dean said firmly. "Then how about we heal you from… stage four stomach cancer?" At this Dean doubled over on the floor and started coughing. He raised his hand to his mouth and when he removed it, it was covered in blood. Lacey pulled him to his feet and placed her hand on his abdomen. Dean felt the same sensation as when she healed his hand. He turned back to Zachariah and said defiantly. "No." "Then lets get really creative. See if you can keep up with this. Uh lets see how… Sam does without his lungs." Laceys eyes widened and she turned to Dean. "I can't heal that." Dean span around to find Sam on the floor choking for breath. "Are we having fun yet? You're going to say yes Dean, cause I'm just getting started." Zachariah smirked. "Enough!" Lacey tells him. Suddenly her eyes begin to glow and she spread her arms wide. Outside they can hear thunder crashing through the sky and a bolt of lightning spikes, barely missing the angels. Zachariah glared at her but took a step back. All of a sudden there is a bright light, brighter even than the lightning bolt and Lacey feels a hand on her shoulder. She turns around to find Castiel standing next to her. "It's OK." he tells her. She nodded and her eyes stop glowing. She takes a step back to stand behind Dean. "How are you…" Zachariah starts. "Alive? That's a good question. How did they end up on that airplane? Another good question. Cause the angels didn't do it. I think we both know the answer don't we?" "No that's not possible!" Zachariah spluttered. "It scares you. Well it should. Now put Sam back together and get out of here. I won't ask twice." With a flurry the angels disappeared. Behind them they heard a gasp as Sam's lungs were returned to him. "You three need to be more careful." Castiel warned them. "Yeah I'm starting to get that. Your frat brothers are bigger dicks than I thought." "I don't mean the angels. Lucifer is circling his vessel. And once he takes it those hex bags won't be enough to protect you." Castiel placed one hand on Sams chest and one hand on Deans. They both let out a gasp. "What the hell was that?" Dean exclaimed. "An Enochian sigil. It'll hide you from every angel in creation, including Lucifer." Castiel told them. "What did you brand us with it?" Dean asked. "No. I carved it into your ribs." They stared at him for a moment. "Okay well shouldn't you do the same for Lacey?" Dean pointed out. "I think I am right in saying that Lacey is a telepath?" Castiel said turning to her. She nodded. "So she doesn't need my help, she can set up a mental block which will stop them from finding her." Lacey smiled at him and nodded. "Already done." "Hey Cas were you really dead?" Sam asked. "Yes." "Then how are you back?" Dean questioned him. But to no avail as Cas had disappeared again. Lacey teleported them back to the hospital. Once they arrived they were informed by the duty nurse that Bobby was out of surgery and recovering. As they walked to his room they heard yelling coming from within. "Unlikely to walk again?! Why you snot nosed son of a bitch! Wait till I get out of this bed!" A doctor rushed out of the room. "I'll use my game leg and kick your friggin' ass! Yeah you better run!" As they were about to walk into the room Dean pulled Lacey to one side. "Can you heal Bobby?" Lacey bit her lip and shook her head looking sad. "I can only heal wounds Dean. If that demon hadn't knocked me out I could have healed him there and then but now it's too late. He's been operated on by the doctors, they've healed the wound inflicted, the paralysis is a side effect. If I'd healed him it would have been clean and he would have been fine, but I can't work miracles." "You healed Sam." Dean pointed out. "Sams legs were broken. I healed his bones. I can't heal something that is a side effect of something else. I'm sorry Dean if there was anything I could do then I would." Dean nodded at her and sighed. "I know. You've done more than enough already." They wandered into Bobby's room. Bobby was sitting upright in the bed. "You believe that yahoo?" He asked exasperated. "Screw him, you'll be fine." Dean told him. "So let me ask the million dollar question, what do we do now?" Sam asked as he sat down in the chair beside the bed. Bobby shrugged his shoulders. "Well … uh save as many as we can for as long as we can I guess. It's bad, whoever wins, Heaven or Hell, we're boned." "What if we win?" Dean asked. They all stared at him. "I'm serious. I mean screw the angels and the demons and their crap apocalypse. Hell they want to fight a war they can find their own planet. This one's ours and I say they get the hell off it. We take em' all on. We kill the devil. Hell we even kill Michael of we have to. But we do it our own damn selves." "And how are we supposed to do all this genius?" Bobby asked him. "I got no idea. But what I do have is a GED and a give em' hell attitude and I'll figure it out." Dean said smiling at them. "You are nine kinds of crazy boy." Bobby said shaking his head. "It's been said." Dean said as he patted him on the shoulder. "Listen you stay on the mend, we'll see you in a bit." As they headed for the door Bobby stopped them. "Sam?" Sam turned to him. "I was awake, I know what I said back there. I just want you to know that…that was the demon talking. I ain't cutting you out boy. Not ever." Sam smiled. "Thanks Bobby." Bobby nodded. "You're welcome. I deserve a damn medal for this but… you're welcome." As the walked across the car park Dean turned to Lacey. "Thanks for your help." Laceys cheeks turned pink and she smiled up at him. "That's ok." "Look is there anywhere we can drop you off? I'm sure you want to go find your family or whatever?" Lacey's smile faded. "I don't even really know where I would start looking, I mean I have no clue who they are, just some vague memories." Dean nodded. "Ok well your welcome to stay with us for a while till you find them." Lacey nodded. "Yeah I'd like that." Dean opened the back door of the Impala for her and she got inside. As he closed the door Sam said; "You know I was thinking Dean maybe we could go after the colt." Dean raised an eyebrow at him. "Why? What difference would that make?" "Well we could use it on Lucifer. I mean you just said back there …" Dean interrupted. "I just said a bunch of crap for Bobby's benefit. I mean I'll fight, I'll fight till the last man but let's at least be honest. I mean we don't stand a chance, and you know that, I mean hell, you of all people know that." "Dean… is there something you want to say to me?" "I tried Sammy. I mean I really tried. But I just can't keep pretending that everything's all right. Because it's not. And it's never going to be. You chose a demon over your own brother and look what happened." "I would give anything – anything- to take it all back." Sam said sadly, staring at the floor. "I know you would. And I know how sorry you are, I do. But man you were the one I depended on the most and you let me down in ways that I can't even…" Dean stopped for a moment. "I'm just having a hard time forgiving and forgetting here you know." "What can I do?" Sam asked pleadingly. "Honestly? Nothing. I just… I don't think that we can ever be what we were, you know." Dean opened the car door as he spoke. "I just don't think I can trust you." He climbed into the car. Sam stayed standing outside for a moment before silently climbing in next to him. All this time Lacey had sat in the back seat listening. She bit her lip. These guys were so busy saving the world on a daily basis that they have very little of a normal life. All they had was each other. After her time in 'Wonderland' Lacey knew what it was like to be all alone. She was grateful to the Winchesters. They took her in, protected her without flinching, not for a moment. They got little thanks for the work they did even though they had probably saved thousands of lives at least. In that moment Lacey decided she was going to stick with them, no matter what. It was time the Winchesters got a little back. And she was probably one of the few people in the world with the power to help them, maybe even save them for a change. So that's exactly what she would do. She smiled to herself as Dean pulled out of the hospital car park. And so it begins. @18crazybutcutealsopsycho

[musicdeejaysorceress]

Nostalgia Music Playlist Also on Youtube Updated Writings Added By Wednesday October 30 2019

Nostalgia Music Playlist Also on Youtube

First off, I want to thank all who have taken the time to view all of my online content including these music playlists, the following is some of the songs from the Nostalgia Music Playlist that I initially started approximately 9 months ago, one of the multiple reasons why I am sharing this music playlist is because I have had the good fortune of unexpectedly discovering that this is one of my more highly viewed music playlists and to intuitively help remind me that it is ok to share some of my music interests provided I do so in a wise and intuitively thought  process with additional thanks to those who look at my online writings. I intend to share more of the songs from this playlist within 49 to 70 hours andor sooner from now.

Wednesday October 30, 2019 by 1119pm-I listened to my creative intuition to add previous  youtube comments that I have previously written to a multiple number of the songs, I continue to appreciate all who view these writings, though I admit that I must allow the option to be open-ended if I prefer to post written comments to the remaining songs andor to just let it be currently the way it is. I say this with much happiness in my heart, it is just that I must give myself enough time to carefully ponder on this because there are a multiple number of other areas/goals that I must also focus/set to accomplish in my personal andor professional life. Regardless of what I eventually decide, it has been one of my multiple passions to share this nostalgia music playlist and to get a glimpse from other youtube commenters on how diverse music genres of songs can be universal-listened to multiple people from various backgrounds, almost in a music can be a beneficial uniter, an uplifting channel/vehicle for unity.

Nostalgia Music Playlist

Side  Travis

Youtube comment from approximately 9 months ago

Side by Travis is another song that I first heard around the early 2000s when I was first stationed in Yokosuka Japan, definitely by the summer 2003 andor earlier timeframe via I think what was a Brit Awards cd collection. I now intuitively and fully understand the meaning of this meaningful song that is Side by Travis. I truthfully wish that I could  have intuitively and logically realized the message and deeper meaning of this song when I first heard it when I was around 22 years old. However, better late than never and I prefer to be discreet when I first figured out the full meaning of Side by Travis especially since I am in the process of learning to embody the message and meaning of this song as I reluctantly admit to still being a work in progress/construction in progress when it comes to this.

 Addicted Saving Abel

Pain Three Days Grace

Come Go With Me Expose

Your Wildest Dreams  Moody Blues

I Can See Clearly Now Jimmy Cliff

Gold  Spandau Ballet

Stellify Ian Brown

Heart  & Soul T’Pau

Follow You Follow Me Genesis

Wings Little Mix

Youre Still The One Shania Twain

Clumsy Fergie

Belinda Carlisle I Get Wea

Dolphins Cry Live

Express Yourself  Madonna

Caught Up In You  38 Special

Addicted Saving Abel

Secret Rendezvous Karyn White

If You Only Knew Shinedown

I Feel The Earth Move  Martika

Circle In The Sand Belinda Carlisle

Desire U2

Orinoco Flow Enya

In Your Eyes  Kylie Minogue

Sensitized Kylie Minogue

Trying Not To Love You  Nickelback

Therapy  Armin Van Buuren James Newman

Lovesong  The Cure

C’Mon and Get My Love  D-Mob feat. Cathy Dennis

Do You Know Angel City

Touch Me Angel City

I Wanna Be Bad  Willa Ford

Va Va Voom Nicki Minaj

I’m So Into You SWV

Slide In GoldFrap

Meet Me Halfway Black Eyed Peas

Scream & Shout  will.i.am

Burnin For You Blue Oyster Cult

Dr. Feelgood Motley Crue

The Perfect Drug Nine Inch Nails

Latch  Disclosure feat. Sam Smith

Crush Dave Matthews Band

Raindrops (Encore Une Fois Pt. II) Extended Mix by Sash! Feat. Stunt youtube comment from approximately 2 months ago

I must properly credit and admit that a version of this Raindrops song from the Trance Party Vol. 6  that I enjoyed listening to multiple times (before heading to where I worked in Norfolk Virginia) around the 2008 timeframe is one of the reasons that indirectly influenced why I enjoy this youtube version of Raindrops (Encore Une Fois Pt. II) to this day. I was living quite a carefree and a little bit of a freespirited life during this time yet one of the reasons why I first enjoyed this distinctive song even then and even to this day relates to the exciting adventurous vibe energy to this song.

Is This Love Whitesnake youtube comment from approximately 2 months ago

I feel very lucky to have heard this dazzling romantic rock song Is This Love by Whitesnake by the time I was between 8 to 11 years old either by local radio andor television. I also started to enjoy Is This Love by Whitesnake so much more by the July 2011 timeframe because it was contained on a music collection titled American Anthems that I unexpectedly discovered through the Amazon UK website.

Rock You Like A Hurricane Scorpions youtube comment from 2 months ago

To think I was somewhere around 13 to 15 years old when I unintentionally heard this push the envelope yet amusing classic rock song that is Rock You Like a Hurricane by the Scorpions via local radio. Obviously, I enjoy the album version of Rock You Like a Hurricane, however I feel that this live version of Rock You Like a Hurricane also does the album version justice.

No One Like You Scorpions youtube comment from 2 months ago

I am lucky to have been exposed to multiple brilliant classic rock songs  via online and radio. This song No One Like You by the Scorpions is a refreshing/one of a kind song that I first heard around by the time I was between 13 to 16 years old via local radio, and I started to unexpectedly enjoy much more by the late 2010/early 2011 timeframe.

Miss You The Rolling Stones youtube comment from 2 months ago

I truly wish that I could easily recall the very first time in my life that I first heard I Miss You by The Rolling Stones. However, I am so glad in a pleasant way to have surprisingly heard this well made classic rock song via a local metropolitan Washington D.C. radio station less than a year ago.

Wicked Game Chris Isaak

Peaceful Easy Feeling  Eagles youtube comment from 2 months ago

There are a multiple number of songs that  I enjoy by the Eagles with I confess some of the songs such as Witchy Woman, One of These Nights, Take It Easy and Life In The Fast Lane being among some of those songs. However, something about this Peaceful Easy Feeling classic rock tune by the Eagles made an indelible mark on my soul when I first heard this song via local radio by the time I was between my mid 20s to late 20s. The calming and yet optimistic vocals and music also do it for me with this entertaining classic rock song.

Candyman Christina Aguilera youtube comment from 2 months ago

There was a catchy commercial that I spotted sometime around the 2007 to 2009 timeframe featured the Candyman song by Christina Aguilera which helped me become aware of this daring song. I admit that the music video to the Candyman song also gives this Christina Aguilera song a quirky and compelling music story quality/vibe.

I Begin To Wonder Danni Minogue

Full Service  New Kids On the Block youtube comment from 2 months ago

I confess that I got into this Full Service song by the New Kids On The Block by the summer 2011 timeframe some time after purchasing the Block music collection by New Kids on the Block by the February 2011 timeframe. Additionally, I find the metaphor of the auto/car imagery to describe what they intend to do do for their love interest/intended human target in this song very novel/distinctive.

Rendez-Vu Basement Jaxx youtube comment from 2 months ago

I have to credit first hearing this Rendez-vu song by Basement Jaxx from a Brit Awards music collection by the 2002 timeframe (I just wish that I could remember which one).  The romantic vocals and the futuristic music create a one of a kind electronic/club/dance tune/melody.

When the Lights Go Out Five youtube comment from 2 months ago

I admit that I am previously familiar with this illicit music pleasure song that is When The Lights Go Out by Five because I had heard this song via a local radio station when I was around 17/18 years old. The 90s dance, club and hip-hop music melding coupled with the bold vocals and lyrics definitely make this song an entertaining nostalgic 90s song.

Bubblin Blue feat. L.A.D.E

Voodoo Adam Lambert youtube comment from 2 months ago

I confess that this soulful and passionate song that is Voodoo by Adam Lambert first penetrated my music soul when I first heard it by the October 2011 timeframe. Something about the shining vocals and radiant music makes me think of a musical story about someone who has left such a powerful mark on the singer's soul to where their love for that person metaphorically influences the person to be totally wrapped around the finger of the person who they are bewitched by (in love with).

My Kinda Party Jason Aldean youtube comment from 2 months ago

I admit that I happen to unexpectedly find out about a music collection by Jason Aldean online around summer 2011 that contained the My Kinda Party song (definitely by the August 2011 timeframe). For whatever reason, this catchy country song played in my mind today.

 If You Only Knew Shinedown

Practice What You Preach Barry White

Possum Kingdom The Toadies

Owner of A Lonely Heart Yes

Lovesong The Cure

Live version of The Lovesong by The Cure via the New Wave & Rock 80’s Memories-It was an easy decision for me to take a chance on listening to a live version of The Cure’s classic Lovesong because I have enjoyed this creative and moving song for multiple years now, and first hearing it inside a store around the time I was 8 or 9 years old. I understand that others may interpret this song in different ways though I have always taken this song to be about a person telling another that they are always going to be in love with the person regardless of what they may do or say andor how long they may be in that person’s life, basically a positive song about enduring love, either way I find this song to be very meaningful.

Last Nine Inch Nails

Only When I Sleep The Corrs

Soothe My Soul Depeche Mode youtube comment from 2 months ago

Depeche Mode - Soothe My Soul (Official Music Video) Soothe My Soul-I’m fortunate to have had a chance to purchase the music collection that contained this song in 2013 and I reluctantly admit that certain circumstances came up to where I started to hear and enjoy this song more in the 2017 timeframe the more that I would hear this song via my iheartradio account . This group sounds just as good live, I have been to a Depeche Mode concert in 2013 and in 2017 and both times the live performances were even better than I imagined and I have to credit my husband for influencing me to like this group in the first place because he introduced me to a good mix of their music around the year when we first met (we met in August 2002).

2 Hearts Kylie Minogue youtube comment from one month ago

2 Hearts by Kylie Minogue-My angelic husband actually introduced me to a great deal of her music around the 2003 timeframe and I started to listen to Kylie Minogue much more after we got married in 2004. X was one of the first music collections that I wanted to buy via my own free will though my husband was again being very sweet by purchasing me the X music collection that this sensual and well crafted song that 2 Hearts is on. I admit that I started to enjoy this song around the autumn 2007 timeframe when I first heard it online.

Things Can Only Get Better Howard Jones

Pocketful of Sunshine Natasha Bedingfield

No One Is To Blame Howard Jones

All I Wanna Do Danni Minogue

Mr. Saxobeat Alexandra Stan youtube comment from 1 month ago

Thank goodness for one of the Future Trance cds (Germany music import) introducing me to Mr. Saxobeat by Alexandra Stan around the summer 2011 timeframe.

Sex Type Thing Stone Temple Pilots youtube comment from 1 month ago

Sex Type Thing by Stone Temple Pilots-I confess that this song first seeped into my mind when I first heard this song as a 90s teenager via radio andor television (sometime between the time I was between 14 to 17 years old). For whatever reason, I admit that this song crept back into my memory when I heard it again around the autumn 2009 timeframe when I saw a Stone Temple Pilots greatest hits cd at an Orlando Florida library (this particular library was a few miles from the University of Central Florida campus). Anyhow, the more I think of it the woman in that music video definitely plays whatever role she was given very well though for some reason her dress makes me think of a Cinderella vibe.

Wicked Garden Stone Temple Pilots

Red Light Go Mea Fisher youtube comment from 1 month ago

I’m both so grateful and feeling happy/joyful that youtube has the image for the Femmes Fatales The 12 Leading Ladies of Electronica music collection because that music collection is where I first heard the electrifying and seductive Red Light Go song by Mea Fisher around the autumn 2008 timeframe and one of my earliest memories of hearing and enjoying this song was when this song was playing in a car that I had and drove in to work around this timeframe (I had purchased the music collection from some music store inside MacArthur Center mall in Norfolk Virginia by the autumn 2008 timeframe and the mp3 music collection from Amazon multiple years later). Anyhow,  the vocals and music to this Red Light Go song  by Mea Fisher are very memorable despite this song being definitely different from being a super cheerful type of electronic/club song.

I’ll Make You Feel Good K7 youtube comment from 1 month ago

Regarding K7 I'll Make You Feel Good song-I first heard this bold and innovative song during my teenage years during local radio and for whatever unexpected reason I got into this song again by around the 2008 timeframe when I was residing in Norfolk Virginia.

Right Round Flo Rida feat. Kesha

I Like It Rough by Lady Gaga-I confess that this is an illicit pleasure song that I first heard by around the 2008 timeframe through a zune music player that I use to have. Additionally, Lady Gaga’s music was played via  local radio in Norfolk Virginia (where my husband and I were residing in during that timeframe) and via online,  hearing through these channels Lady Gaga’s music indirectly influenced me to give more of her songs a listen

Cold Crossfade

Waiting For You Layla comment from 1 month ago

This youtube music video for Waiting For You by Layla via the Femmes Fatales the 12 Leading Ladies of Electronica deserve more views. i first heard this bold and club like song around the autumn 2008 timeframe when hearing this song after buying the Femmes Fatales cd collection from the MacArthur Center mall in Norfolk Virginia, I enjoyed the collection so much that it was an easy decision for me to purchase the mp3 music collection from Amazon multiple years later.

Sunlight In The Rain Kelli Ali youtube comment from 1 month ago

I remember this beautiful song Sunlight In The Rain by Kelli Ali from around the 2005 to 2007 timeframe because my angelic husband had us listening to a chillout music compilation and this gem of a song was one of the songs on this collection. I am happy/overjoyed that this gorgeous song is also available on youtube.

Siria Endless Summer

I Surrender Kate Ryan  via the song version similar to the youtube poster image of Trance Volume 2 youtube comment from 1 month ago

This music version of I Surrender by Kate Ryan is similar to a version of the song that I heard via a Best of Dance 2008 music collection by the December 2008/January 2009 timeframe.  I am thrilled/excited to find the version of this song on this youtube music channel.

Deeper Fragma

Burning Love Katie Jewels

Rush Rush Full Length version Paula Abdul youtube comment from 1 month ago

I’m so glad that this full length version is currently available on youtube the chemistry between Paula Abdul and Keanu Reeves is sizzling. I unexpectedly found this full length youtube video version of Rush Rush by Paula Abdul though I am lucky to have first heard this song in the early 90s via television andor radio by the time I was somewhere between 11 to 14 years old, the music, video, and the vocals for this song are enthralling.

Feeling Hypnotized Blackliquid Remix Colette youtube comment from 1 month ago

This song Feelin Hypnotized by Colette is far from the most cheerful song, yet there is something about this song I find very magnetic nearly 11 years after I first heard this unique song (autumn 2008 in Norfolk Virginia). I’m thrilled to find Hypnotized by Colette on this youtube channel via the Femmes Fatales The 12 Leading Ladies of Electronic because it was the Femmes Fatales collection was where I first heard this song.

Sweet Dreams La Bouche

Little Bird Annie Lennox

Beyond The Invisible Enigma

Lovergirl Teena Marie youtube comment from 1 week ago

It is definitely beyond rhyme and reason why this classic song that is Lovergirl by Teena Marie is on my mind tonight. There are a multiple number of fun to read comments on this page in regards to this song all I can add is that probably in the case of multiple music listeners on this page I first unexpectedly heard this song via local radio as a teenager and then I started to enjoy the song much more after hearing it on a local California radio station in my 20s. Fast forward by around the  December 10, 2010 and via circumstances that are better for me to be discreet about, I started to enjoy this song again more frequently. Though I must say after hearing Teena Marie's powerful vocals in this Lovergirl song that the music coupled with her vocals showcase a dynamo vocal/music powerhouse with this song.

See You Again Miley Cyrus youtube comment from 1 week ago

I find See You Again by Miley Cyrus to be very fun and pleasant to listen to even after multiple years after first hearing this catchy song. One of my earliest memories of  when I happen to have unexpectedly heard this song was around the late 2007/early 2008 timeframe when I heard this song play on a local Florida radio station in a car that I had at the time (My husband and I were stationed on the Mayport Naval base through the navy around this timeframe).

Take My Breath Away Berlin

Gimme Some Love Gina G youtube comment from 1 week ago

I'm thrilled to see this exciting dance/club song and the image cover for the song that is Gimme Some Love by Gina G here on youtube for two major reasons, one because I saw an mp3 version of thissong available for purchase online and only realized this after seeing this image and 2 this song brings back happy memories of when I first heard this song in my early 20s from a dance music collection that I had purchased multiple years ago when I was in Japan, even my amazing husband was singing part of this song the first time I started to play it on youtube tonight.

Self Control Laura Branigan youtube comment from 1 week ago

I feel very lucky to have first heard Self Control by Laura Branigan when I was around 7 andor 8 years old (1987/1988 timeframe) via local radio, this unique song penetrated  my soul the first time I heard it as a very young girl and multiple years later I still enjoy listening to this elegant song and I'm so glad the the music video is available to watch online because even the music video has a distinctive storytelling quality to it that enhances what appears to be a sleeptime dream in this music video for the song Self Control by Laura Branigan

I See Right Through To You DJ Encore

Something Kinda Ooooh Girls Aloud

Only When I Lose Myself Depeche Mode

Promiscuous Girl Nelly Furtado Timbaland

Turn Me On  David Guetta Nicki Minaj youtube comment from 7 months ago

Turn Me On David Guetta Nicki Minaj-As with many others, this daring song penetrated my soul when I first listened to the music collection that this distinctive song was on around what was either the July 2011 andor August 2011 timeframe.

Love Affair Kylie Minogue

Love Affair by Kylie Minogue-I have to credit my heavenly husband for indirectly influencing one of the multiple reasons why I still enjoy a multiple number of her songs multiple years later (because he had introduced me to more of her music in the early 2000s. For whatever reason, I noticed and listened more often to this vivid song more frequently after the April 2011 timeframe, this was around the same month that I enjoyed the good fortune of being able to attend one of her concerts.  One of the reasons why this song stays in my mind multiple years later is because of the daring energy of the song.

Fever Madonna

Fever by Madonna-I started to more frequently listen to this song by the early 2000s when I was stationed in Yokosuka Japan (through the U.S. Navy) and her music relates to multiple happy memories during my time there including the connection with this smoldering and memorable song.

Circle In The Sand Belinda Carlisle

Circle in the Sand Belinda Carlisle-I am very lucky to have actually heard this song by the time I was 7 years old on local radio around the time I had heard her Heaven on Earth song. I then started to get into this song much more after the late 2007 timeframe after purchasing one of her greatest hit music collections that contained this Circle in the Sand song. One of the reasons why I enjoy this remarkable song is because this song makes me think of a connection to a destiny andor mystical type of situation that appears to be implied in a creative way with this song.

Work Freemasons Radio Edit Kelly Rowland

Work (Freemasons Radio Edit) by Kelly Rowland, I confess that I actually became aware of this exhilarating club song after hearing this song via a UK music import of the Now 69 music collection that I purchased by the 2008 timeframe.

Chocolate Kylie Minogue

Chocolate by Kylie Minogue-I’m fortunate to have seen a music video to Chocolate by Kylie Minogue online by around the January 2004 to June 2004 timeframe and I have enjoyed this captivating song every since.

my husband is the one who played a major influence in why I started to listen to the music of Kylie Minogue more often starting around the timeframe of 2002/2003. This song Chocolate by Kylie Minogue is a masterpiece of a song that I remember first hearing by early 2004 when I was 23 years old and living in California. This song also reminds me in a blissful way of my husband who helps encourage me to be more than just the best wife I can be yet also a woman who is in the process of learning to be more in touch with my intuition, self confident, and resilient.

Dangerous cascada

Dangerous by Cascada-I luckily heard this song by the 2011/2012 timeframe via one of her music collections. The music story of how one person can have such a strong effect on the heart despite being very “dangerous” makes for enthralling music.

Wildest Dreams Taylor Swift

I am lucky to be previously familiar with Wildest Dreams by Taylor Swift because I had purchased her 1989 music collection by around the December 2014 timeframe. This creative song leaves it open-ended in a clever way why the romantic partnership was meant to be temporary from the start because at the beginning of the song the lyrics suggest/implied that the music/song narrator already saw the temporary vibe of the love affair even before it began though it leaves it open why this was known ahead of time. However the lyrics no one has to know what we do definitely seems to hint at some taboo, controversial andor forbidden partnership with some rebel person type of character maybe/possibly similar to in Taylor Swift’s Ready For It song from her Reputation music collection.

High On Life DJ Encore

High On Lifeby DJ Encore-A beautiful dance song that appears to be about being around someone who has a healing andor creative inspiring effect on someone’s spirit. I feel lucky that I had the opportunity to obtain the music collection containing this during when I was in my 20s.

Falling Into You Celine Dion

Whine Up Kat De Luna feat. Elephant Man

Like A Prayer Madonna

Like a Prayer by Madonna-I am blessed to have originally heard this moving/meaningful love song by around the 1989/1990 timeframe though I admit to only intuitively being at least somewhat aware of some of the meanings of the Like A Prayer song after the 2016 timeframe for some. A dynamic song about how being in love with someone can be almost like a powerful spiritual experience.

Number 1 Goldfrapp youtube comment from 11 months ago

I like the electro and club vibe energy in this song Number 1 by Goldfrapp. I luckily first heard this song around the 2005/2006 via online.

Feel Your Love Kim Sozzi

Feel Your Love by Kim Sozzi-I am very lucky to have first heard this original dance/club love song that is Feel Your Love by around the March 2011 to July 2011 timeframe. Even multiple years after enjoying it I still have yet to make out the full meaning of this song, I am wondering if this song symbolizes either expectedly andor reuniting with someone after a long time span- 5 years andor longer-and pretty much telling them that you are ready to start anew with forgiveness. Regardless of the Feel Your Love meaning, the vocals are astonishing and the music and the music video have a vibrant energy even with the element of the night time lights in the music video.

Gods & Monsters Lana Del Rey

Gods and Monsters by Lana Del Rey-This is a music gem that I have to admit that I am previously familiar with after first hearing it via Lana Del Rey’s Born To Die Paradise Edition by around the November 2012 timeframe. Her soulful vocals and passionate energy in this song creatively transform Gods and Monsters into a song that could appear to have multiple meanings because of the abstract yet make a music listener think type of lyrics.

Youtube comment from 7 months ago

Gods and Monsters Lana Del Rey-I admit that I became familiar with this song after the November 2012 timeframe when I purchased her Born to Die Paradise music collection. Still years later, I confess that I find the push the envelope vocals and daring indie dance music fun to listen to with Gods and Monsters by Lana Del Rey.

The Dolphins Cry Live

Possum Kingdom The Toadies

Come On Barry White

How Deep Is Your Love Bee Gees youtube comment from 2 weeks ago

I have my amazing husband to thank for indirectly influencing me to love this one of a kind song that is How Deep is Your Love by Bee Gees, he recently was singing this song out of the blue when I was already in a happy mood, I find this song to be very beautiful even if I am still trying to intuitively and logically determine if this song is from the male perspective, and yes I do show my sweet and handsome husband how much he means to me multiple times because I intuitively understand that there are multiple other women who also would be happy to do the same though that is something for another post.

Do It Nelly Furtado

Ooh Ooh Baby Britney Spears

Break The Ice Britney Spears

Cyclone Baby Bash T-Pain

Like A Drug Kylie Minogue youtube comment from 8 months ago

My creative intuition/intuitive heart is influencing me to honor my husband with this love/dance song that is Like a Drug by Kylie Minogue. I truthfully purchased the music collection by Kylie Minogue in late 2007 featuring this song and I got into this Like A Drug song more by the 2008 timeframe when I was residing in Norfolk Virginia. Fortunately my husband is encouraging me of listening to her music to this day since he was significant in influencing me to enjoy more of her music when after we first met in 2002.

Fascination Alphabeat

Pumpkin Soup Kate Nash

Take Control DJ Bobo

Come On Get Higher Matt Nathanson

Live Your Life  T.I. Rihanna

Heartbeat Madonna