#shrek x lord farquaad

[jamalgripperton46290]

MEGA Smut-Shots Masterlist

The Sharpest Tool In The Shed (Shrek x Lord Farquaad)

Getting Freaky On a Friday Night (Pico x Boyfriend)

The Wall Around Our Love (Donald Trump x Elmo)

Banging Into You (Bing x Bang)

Above and Beyond (Kwazii x Peso)

A Juicy Big Mac, Please (Ronald McDonald x Kurger Bing)

A Warm Welcome (Cookie Monster x Elmo)

Sweet Puddin' (Harley Quinn x The Joker)

The Suffocating Scent Of Lust (Joe Biden x Donald Trump)

[shrekslittlefart]

Guys, go check out the BRAND NEW chapter 9 of "Shrek Takes a Giant Shit On Mrs. Louise's Desk", on Wattpad!! This wonderful chapter is packed chalk-full of scrumptious suspense, sweet sounding situations, action-packed adventure, ravenous romance, and much, much more! This is for sure the most stupendous, breathtaking chapter out of all the ones that have been published so far! We sincerely hope you have as much fun reading this, as we had writing it! The link is in our bio. (this was totally not written because the authors were extremely bored and were desperate to laugh at something)

[bonecarversbestie]

The King of Hybern is, in fact, Lord Farquaad.

[ladywatereton]

✨20 years Shrek 2✨

🎥 Shrek 2 (2004).

🎶 Holding Out For A Hero, Jennifer Saunders.

[rosyrosethorns]

(i may hate dabbling in toxic f/o romance, but i tend to dabble in toxic f/o friendships sometimes… im still a bit nervous about posting this since its a little more ugly than what i usually post but i had the idea for a while and only recently got more courage to write it)

୨ ——- ♡ ——- ୧

"... I don't wanna do this," Madi grumbled as she and the Pied Piper approached the town. Her mute lover raised his brow as he inquired why she was hesitant through briefly playing his flute.

"Mm... The guy in charge is... WAS... a friend of mine, but he said something sexist once and I'm mad at him," she replied. "But I still feel like I gotta do this, so... I wanna do it quick."

The Piper had a sympathetic expression on his face as he followed her to the town entrance. Honestly--this rope fencing and the mascot head at the front made her feel like this village was a public attraction... Probably because that was what its ruler wanted it to be.

୨ ——- ♡ ——- ୧

"Well~... Look who has finally graced Duloc with her presence again~"

The girl winced a little as she saw Lord Farquaad approaching her. He hadn't seemed like he changed a bit since their last encounter... And not just his height, though that wasn't the problem here either way.

"Have you finally found it in your heart to forgive me, my dear?~" the coy man inquired. A gloved hand raised to take Madi's... But the irritated girl's brow furrowed as she pulled her arm away.

"No," she huffed; crossing her arms and averting her eyes. The Piper looked awkward as he observed this tense interaction...

Farquaad was stunned by her reaction, but attempted his sweet talk once more: “Madilyn… My dear; I can’t imagine another reason why you would be here other than—“

“There is, dumbass,” Madi interjected. “It’s just… It’s just that, unfortunately, you happen to be… the only one I can go to for help with this. It… It involves Jack Horner…”

… The small man’s lips curled into a smirk before he chuckled in reply. “Ohh, of course it’s Mister Horner,” he remarked snidely. “That brute doesn’t know how to treat a woman even with pointers—“

To everyone’s surprise, Madi suddenly whacked Farquaad over the head; causing the man to exclaim in pain as he abruptly reverted to his ghost form.

“Listen before you jump to conclusions!!” the irritated girl snapped. “I’m concerned about him! He finally got his wish but he’s still unhappy, and when I tried offering to help him figure out why he pushed me away instead and told me I’m not gonna be a manager anymore!”

Although still stunned by the whack on the head, it didn’t stop Farquaad from making another comment:

“Well, of course he would do such a thing. When was the last time this so-called ‘friend’ of yours actually did something considerate for you? And those pies shouldn’t necessarily count—if you were forced to prioritize for him so often the baked goods seem more like bribing to prevent reconsideration of your position, don’t you think?~”

… Madi fell silent as her eyes averted to the floor; thinking heavily on what he said. It was true… Jack’s strong desire to get his wish left the girl desperate to fulfill it as a desire to see her friend happy for once. But instead of admitting it to the ghostly lord’s face, she glared up at him before attempting to hit him over the head again.

“Ah ah ah; you got one in already, remember?” Farquaad reminded her as her hand phased right through his translucent form.

“That was completely unwarranted!” the girl snapped.

“Oh, but you do realize it’s true, don’t you?—that brief melancholic expression said it all, dear~”

Irritated, Madi averted her gaze once again… But a gentle hand on her shoulder caused her to look up, and her expression softened as she saw the Piper standing beside her for reassurance. This was a difficult situation for her, and he could easily tell.

“… Look,” the girl grumbled as she turned back to Farquaad, “I’m still mad at you. But, like, I did not give you a physical form to swap to just for you to take advantage of my generosity—you owe me a damn favor. I… I need you to help me figure out why Jack’s still unhappy, especially since… I don’t think he wants to be friends with me anymore and you being a ghost gives you stealth advantage.”

“Hmm…” The ghost raised an eyebrow as he tapped his chin. “Does this mean you’ll forgive me for that little remark if I comply?~”

“No.”

Madi’s stubbornness baffled Farquaad. “Oh—What would you expect from me to be able to dismiss such a thing?!”

“Well, a change of attitude, mainly—and I don’t see that in you right now.”

An annoyed growl escaped the ghost as he crossed his arms. “You are persistent, aren’t you?” he scowled in response. “I don’t understand how your boyfriend can deal with such pettiness.”

A shrill note on the Piper’s flute caught everyone’s attention. He seemed visibly offended by the comment.

“… Fucking hell—forget it, then,” Madi grumbled as she turned to leave. “I’ll figure something else out—“

“Oh, now, hang on just a second!!” Farquaad suddenly seemed desperate as his spectral form flew in front of her… Realizing he was being snappy, he hurriedly changed his tone with a stutter before he continued: “Madilyn, my dear, please give me another chance; I do solemnly swear to never make another remark concerning the hierarchy of men and women in your presence again if you don’t walk out this time. Why, I’ll even do you this one favor if it’ll convince you to stick around!”

… The girl and her mute lover exchanged glances. This ghost was so full of himself, neither of them could trust his word. But a part of Madi still quietly cared about him… and jabbing a finger towards him, she gave him this blunt reply:

“You’re on thin ice, Farquaad.”

[yourneighborhoodstalker]

Hidden Intimacy

Requested by: anika.jar on Instagram

Pairing: Shrek x Sonic, Sonic x Barack Obama Genre: crack, romance, angst, comedy. Summary: Shrek is heart-broken from what Sonic has done to him. WARNING: crack (nothing is serious at all), randomness, cheating(?), heartbreak, and many mentions of fecal matter.

It was a lovely, rainy day during the summer. Shrek was casually watering the plants outside… Even though it was raining. He was wearing absolutely, almost, nothing. So the rain droplets had travelled down his chest and to his chisled abs. The only thing keeping him from being completely exposed and vulnerable is the skirt he had put on for his lovely partner, Sonic.

He was humming the 3 Musketeers anthem while smoothly swaying his hips on beat. "bAbY cAlL mY pHonE tRyNa BlOw HeR TaX cHeCk. CALL ME A NYMPHO 'CAUSE I LIKE GOOD SEX-" Then a Koko Bandicooties plush toy from the typical MagDonal's Sad Meal was thrown at his beautiful right ear. His head flew to the left so far that his brains blew out.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH" He screams out and quickly gets up to gather the contents of his skull.

"SHUT THE FACK UP." His stupid, drunk, handsome neighbour, Fred Jones, yelled out at him through his window of his pink house.

"Oh! Hi Freddie!"

"Shut the halk up. You ain't no lover of mine."

"What about that ONE time in the janitor's closet at school 3500000000000 years ago-"

"That was a LONG time ago. Leave me the fack alone!"

Fred closes his window. From behind, as Shrek could see. there was Velma standing up and kissing Fred in the most nastiest way ever that Shrek could've thrown up on his newly grown tulips. "cough whore cough" He rolls his eyes and continues watering his plants.

He looks up and sighs in content. He smiles slightly and opens his mouth to taste the rain because who wouldn't? The scent of the rain smelled… off. He swished some rain water in his mouth and swallowed it. "… Oh. That's piss."

Shrek then heard a crash inside of his home due to his beautiful ears. He dropped his watering can and ran inside. He ran into the kitchen and grabbed the nearest kitchen tool he could lay his hands on; the tongs.

He hears more noises coming from upstairs, to which he proceeded to slowly, quietly, and carefully walk up the stairs. He held the tool up in caution. On the way up, he looks at the family pictures of his family.

There was him and Sonic. Happily smiling at the camera while standing on Lord Farquaad's grave. He sighs a bit, reminiscing about the good ol' days when Sonic didn't spend so much time at work.

They had their wedding in coolsville's graveyard where Lord Farquaad was buried after Shrek had ate him. Only his bones remained in the casket; they were as clean as Shrek's kitchen.

He remembers the romantic moment when Sonic and Shrek had pulled down their underwears and shit on his grave. The minister, Ryuk, had gathered the shit in his hands and mix them together, creating a bond, unbreakable.

"I announce you… Ogre and Hedgehog!" He announced, holding up into the sun to let it get blessed by their wonderful god, Mike Wazowski. The bright, green light illuminated onto the shit and slowly faded away, leaving it blessed and sparkly. Everyone- which was 3-5 people- clapped and cheered for them. Shrek and Sonic look at each other with such love in their eyes and dug their faces into the fecal matter.

Shrek sighed from the memory that he almost forgot that he might be potentially robbed! He snapped out of it and continued his travel. He saw the bedroom door slightly open. He gulped and slowly opened it to see… Sonic and BARACK OBAMA eating each other's biscuits over their tea table.

He gasped loudly, dropping the tongs. Sonic and Barack look up quickly and stand up. Sonic's cheeks have been flushed and Barack's tie is hung loosely around his neck. They were all speechless and just standing there, staring at each other in shock.

"Shrek! My dream machine!" Sonic exclaimed, putting his hands up. Shrek felt his heart pound against his chest that you could even see it.

"Squishy boo-boo on the choo choo… I can explain-"

"NO! You are with HIM?! Over OUR tea table?!"

Shrek screamed out, tears running down his round cheeks, glistening them. "WHAT HAPPENED TO US?! THIS IS OUR TABLE! You… You…" Sonic rapidly shook his head in desperation.

"Shrek. Babycakes. NO!-"

"YOU FUCKING WHOOOOREEEEEEEEE!"

Sonic gasped and fell back at the very words that had came out of Shrek's mouth. He was so shocked that Sonic's dress flew off. "OMG Sonicky!" Barack exclaimed and tried to run to him to help him but then the chair had caught his pants and ripped it, making him fall and land hard with the loudest thud known to mankind.

"YOU FUCKING LIAR. YOU TRAITOR. Alexa, play Traitor by Olivia Rodrigo." There was a beep heard and then humming of a specific song was starting to play.

Sonic slowly sits up, holding his chest. "Shrekky… please… don't do this…" He croaked out

"G-Green guilty eyes and… little blue lies-" Shrek sobs out, kneeling down a bit and holding his chest. "Shrek…" Sonic whimpered out, weakly reaching out to him.

Suddenly, Shrek shoots up and roars loudly. It makes the chimney of the house fall off and it lands on Velma- who was sneaking out of Fred's dog door. She died.

Waterfalls of green tears cascade down Shrek's cheeks as he screams and cries. His eyes glow a bright yellow. "SHREK?!"

Barack groans as he slowly sits up. "Sonicky…" He moans out pathetically, clinging onto his leg. Sonic shakes him off and stands up, watching his husband in fear.

Shrek's chest then illuminates a green glow. A swampy odor begins to diffuse throughout the house. Sonic inahles deeply and sighs lovingly. "Shrek…" Barack sniffs and immediately faints due to how amazing it smells.

Shrek's screams turned high-pitched and he explodes into green glitter and sparkles. It was so bright Sonic could've sworn he was blinder than before.

"AHHH. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Sonic screams, falling to his knees. He crawls over and gathers the glitter. "NOOOOOO HIS ASHES ARE SUPPOSED TO BE BROWN!" He sobs and snorts it up in honour of his husband.

A bright yellow light comes from above. Sonic looks up, his tears drenching into his fur. In the light, he sees the face of the god, Mike Wazowski. "M-Master Mike Wazowski…?" He whimpers out, inhaling some of the glitter into his nose.

"Shrek shall be passed onto Hell until you die and you pass onto Hell and you guys can be homosexual lovebirds together and be reborn." He states in his holiness. "R-Really? You would do that?" Mike Wazowski nods his eye. "O-Okay… It's okay if I have some little Shrek in me, right? I accidentally-" He sniffs, wiping his nose. "-snorted him up." The holy god stays quiet. "Sure thing pal." The light backs up. "Bada-bing, bada-boom-boom-boom!" He exclaims and the light fills the house.

Sonic gasps. looking around. "I… I feel… I feel so light! I can feel it! I can feel it in my buss-" Then he fainted.

Sonic blinks his eyes open and sees white everywhere. "Oh Mike… It's so white here…" He mutters. "I know. Pretty racist place huh." Sonic lets out the smallest, cutest gasp that would put anyone in awe. He slowly turns and sees… "Shrekky…?"

[shylock-fredericks]

I LOVE SHREK

[reinapantera]

Big Jack Horner hides with Isabella from Lord Farquaad

And yes I made Lord Farquaad at ZEPETO come find us there 🤪

#Lordfarquaad #shrek #dreamworks

z3p.me/aDMWsX

#bigjackhorner #jackhorner #pussinboots #shareart #nsfw #instaadult #pussinbootsthelastwish #artmoots #thelastwish #littlejacknorner #dreamworks #sketch #digitalart #reinapantera

[onceupona-crossover]

Omniman x lord farquaad because they have the same voice actor in Spain.

Requested by:mod rapunzel

[terribletaletime]

Neko-napped

•

Farquaad put on his suit and tie, preparing for another awful day as a teacher. God, his students were ungrateful brats. He'd teach and teach but they never once paid attention to him, though. Not unless he hat his hat off, and that was only to laugh at him. You see, Farquaad was cursed with a great shame. His mother really pissed off a bitch of a witch and she cursed him with two little cat ears. It made him a freak his entire life and, much like his classroom, he was always either ignored or laughed at. He never found his person, he never found a friend or a lover who could just look past it all and accept him endlessly. Not even his own parents loved him unconditionally. They never once looked him in the eyes. He was an outcast, and he had to confront this reality every time he looked in the mirror. How pathetic.

Shrek hid behind a bush. If he made the slightest movement, Farquaad would know he was there. He couldn't let that happen. No, everything had to be perfect. He watched every movement Farquaad made from the view of his kitchen and Livingroom windows. God, did his heart swell every time he had looked at Farquaad. He was his teacher, and from the moment he saw him he had fallen in love. Shrek, too, was an outcast. Ogre's were seen as filthy violent beasts, and the idea that one could ever be smart enough to be educated was a joke. He had fought his way to get to college, and the millisecond he had stepped on campus he was met with resistance and laughter from both his peers and teachers. Farquaad, however, always treated him right.

The small man walked outside of his home and locked the door. He secured his hat on tightly and started to make his way past his bushes and towards his car door when suddenly he was tackled. He resisted and struggled, but the weight and strength of the large man restrained him. He was tied up with thick scratchy rope and a chloroform rag was put over his mouth. He shook his head and tried to hold his breath, but ultimately it was a useless struggle as he eventually succumbed to the gas-induced slumber.

Farquaad woke up cold and wet. He looked around and saw that he was in a dank and closed off basement. There was a water leak above him, probably from faulty plumbing (do you have plumbing problems like Shrek? Call Pete's Hard Pipes! He'll fix up your pipes real good, for only $12.78 every 30 minutes he's on the job! It's a steal! Quite literally a steal! Every material we use to fix up your house we robbed from you the night before. So, really, you pay us to get your pipes back. Call now, and for fucks sake don't even slightly get the idea to call the cops because we'll have a guy come break your kneecaps!). The light was dim, so he couldn't see perfectly but he could see the vague outlines of the things around him. He was laying atop a large bed with soft comforters and pillows, there was a large cough with a tv sitting right in front of it, there were posters and paintings all along the wall likely to try to make it seem less-threatening than it actually was, there was a toilet with a room divider next to it, and there was a dining table with two chairs. One of the chairs had chains and cuffs all around it.. He saw a camera in the corner with a dim light shining onto him. It seemed to be the only light source around.

"Hey!" He called out, desperate for help. "Hey where am I?" He tried to move, but suddenly realized that he was chained up.

"Shit, what's going on here?" He saw the door on the top of the stairs open, and out came a tall, fat, and green ogre. He quickly recognized it as Shrek, the only student who actually listens to what he has to say.

"Shrek, is that you? What are you doing here? What... what am I doing here? Surely this is all a misunderstanding, right?" Farquaad let out a nervous chuckle.

"Oh Fara, my love, you are so truly naïve. Can't you see what I've built for you?"

Shrek flicked a light switch and there the room was revealed in full view. Everything he had seem before was now illuminated, and he started to realize the small details. The bedding was exactly the same as what he had at home. The posters and paintings he had were all of media that he liked and places that he had been to. Even the dining table and couch was the same as what he had at home.

"What... how..." Shrek bent down to be at the same level of the now quivering and confused man. He put his hand on Farquaad's mouth and shushed him. He then moved his hand towards Farquaad's cheek and gently caressed it.

"Beautiful," Shrek said. "You're beautiful in every way." Farquaad pulled his head back.

"Don't fucking touch me! Listen, Shrek. I respect you as a student, sure, but this? Shrek this is insane. You have to let me go, I wont tell anyone. I swear on my life, Shrek, I'll keep this between us. Besides, you've got this delusion in your head I'm somehow beautiful but you don't even know me. Not really. This will all be for nothing if you truly did, so let's quit while we're ahead, yeah?" Shrek seemed to get angry at this statement.

"Why would you EVER say something as shameful as that? You are the love of my life! You are the most beautiful man I've ever seen!"

"No, I'm not! I'm shameful, if only you knew! Maybe they're all right, maybe Ogre's really are morons because you can't even understand a simple fact that I'm nothing more than a freak!" Shrek took a step back, completely shocked at the fact that the person he worshipped had turned on him. He looked at Farquaad with disgust and started to walk away. Fearful that if he went away he may never come back, Farquad called out to Shrek.

"Wait- I, uh, I'm... I'm sorry. It isn't you, Shrek. It's me. I've got a secret that, well, I've done everything I could to hide it but people always find out and people always leave  me for it. You're not the moron, I am. I shouldn't have taken my fear of you turning on me out on you." Shrek stopped in hid tracks and he turned around, his face riddled with pity.

"Everyone always looks down on me," Shrek said. "But you never did. You always believed in me in class. You would help me with assignments, give me extensions, and call on me when I raised my hand. I've tried to talk to people before, to love them. Every time I go to meet someone, they run away. I couldn't let that happen with yo. My heart swells at the very thought of you. So, I've been watching you every day. I've been studying every little thing I could about you so that way I could know exactly how to make you happy. Farquaad, I know your secret. I've been seeing you from your windows every day. Your ears don't scare me. The only thing that scares me is the thought of you ever looking down on yourself, the thought that you think that you don't deserve any love."

Farquaad started to tear up and turned his head away. Why, why did he feel this way? Shrek gently removed his hat and stroked Farquaad's cat ears with tender love and care. Shrek was his captor, he was the enemy. He was supposed to do everything he could to run away and hide. Yet, all he wanted to do right now was to be with Shrek. For the first time in his life he was unconditionally loved. In fact, he was so loved that Shrek risked everything to build a small life together. Maybe, just maybe, this sick fate was their destiny. Maybe something as deprived like this was perfect for two freaks. Farquaad leaned in and kissed Shrek. Nothing had ever felt more right in either of their lives.

It had been three months of the two of them living together. They had fallen into a routine. They wake up, Shrek makes them a breakfast they share together, Shrek leaves to go to class and to work, he comes back, Shrek makes them lunch, they watch TV together for a few hours, make out a bit or maybe even go further, eat dinner, and then cuddle before dozing off to sleep. It was perfect. To both of them, it was their fairytale dream life. However, what neither of them realized is that their happy ending would soon come to a crashing halt. Shrek had just come home from class when he seemed agitated. 

"What's wrong, love?" Farquaad asked. They had spent enough time together to know the subtle bodily hints to tell when the other is upset.

"We have a problem. They're coming."

"What are you talking about, Shrek?" Shrek sighed as he sat down on their bed.

"I've never told you this, but the university reported you missing about two months ago. They've been investigating it ever since. Once I found that out, I bought a police radio scanner for my car and... I heard over the radio that they're coming. They figured out exactly what I've done and they're on their way. They're going to separate us, we'll never be together again."

"No, NO! They can't do that. Surely there's a way around this. I'll testify! We can say it was all some sort of weird fetish thing, right? They have to believe that, right?" Shrek let out a wry chuckle.

"They'll never believe that my love. There is a way for us to be together forever, though." Shrek pulled out a pistol from his pocket.

"With this, we die together. In our each other's arms, we will be eternally joined. They can't take that away from us." The sirens started to become audible.

"Okay," Farquaad said without hesitation. Let's do this."

Shrek hugged Farquaad as tightly as possible. They both started to sob siflty as they felt the warm embrace of the other. Shrek kissed Farquaad's head and pulled the trigger. His lover's brain splattered all over his face, bedding, and the walls. He cried even harder, and pointed the gun towards his head.

"Here's to forever."

[shrekslittlefart]

Guys! Go check out our Wattpad Shrek Fanfiction! The link is in our bio.

[yelspyder]

hi can you are gwen and miles (separate) x fem reader headcanons with a short s/o?

˚‧⁺.-“I’m just compact and ridiculously adorable”

↳ summary: them w/ a short S/O

↳ characters: (separately) Miles Morales, Gwen Stacy

↳ Fem! Reader

↳ notes: ugh, i will never be able to put into words how much i love gwen and miles. they two are just so asjfjddkdkddkd anyway, thanks for asking and hope you like it!

Miles Morales

Miles would find your height difference cute, after all, it was all the more reason he could praise you. This boy would be wanting to hug you all the time, but it's not his fault you're so cute, your size just makes it easier for him to hug you.

He would give you a ride on his back whenever you wanted, after all, he is your hero. No arguments, he would just agree and carry you like a princess, not to mention that he wouldn't do it out of obligation or anything like that, but because he loves seeing your stupid smile and gremlin laughs on your face whenever he carries you on his back.

Miles might not always be there due to his duties as spider-man, but whenever he is, he makes sure he treats you like a princess and always compliments your height, listing all the perks and assuring you that he loves that about you. He would 100% compare the size of your hands, and he would definitely die from cuteness inside.

He always emphasizes your height in the drawings and sketches he makes of you in a good way. He doesn't accept that your drawings are less than perfect, and that includes being true to your height, after all you are perfect in his eyes.

If you were sad or unsure about your height, Miles will wrap you in a blanket burrito and have a conversation about how awesome you are and should see it like him, followed by a movie session with snacks and sweets. In the end, your self-esteem would be high (at least for a while) because, come on, this is Miles we're talking about and we know he's the best "psychologist" out there.

Gwen Stacy

Gwen would tease you a bit about your height, but nothing to offend you of course. If she saw that you were uncomfortable with her teasing, she would immediately go over and give you a few hugs as an apology.

She thinks it's super cute how you depend on her to get something from the top shelf, so she always leaves a few jars on the top shelves so you have to ask her for help. Whenever you asked for help, she would arrive with a teasing smile on her face as she helped you, but the tables turned as soon as you dropped a quick peck on her lips and called her 'my hero' dramatically, she would turn into a puddle of shyness.

If you found this whole teasing funny and even joined in on the joke, Gwen would definitely joke about how you look like Lord Farquaad from Shrek. The next day, you showed up on her doorstep in a badly done cosplay of him and it became a meme between the two of you.

She always finds all the teasing amusing, but if anyone else does it, especially in a mean way, she quickly becomes aggressive. It wouldn't escalate into a physical fight, but she would have a private "friendly" conversation with them and, if they continued, the ghost-spider who would deal with them.

Even though Gwen says you're small (she's not wrong here), all she wants to do after a long day is hug you. Due to your size, she would be the big spoon most of the time, holding you does decompress her tense muscles, but she doesn't mind, and even prefers, to be held when she needs comfort. Hearing you talk about your day as she hugs you does wonders for Gwen.

[ilyasorokinn]

thank the donkey , ross macdonald

note, okay, originally, there was going to be a big halloween series, but i couldn't think of anything that really spoke to me and i wasn't inspired, but i was inspired to write for ross. so, this is my contribution to the holiday. this is my new personality trait, get used to it. also, lmk if you like this little family because i do and would like to write more if you'd want to see it :) another note, i tried to find photos of the costumes but couldn't so please just use your imagination :) last note, dedicating this to vee (@abiiors)! i was inspired by your dad!ross, so in my world, ross is also a girl dad and names his daughters after flowers lol love ya <3 pair, ross macdonald x reader summary, poppy macdonald is upset her dad is working on halloween. her dad is even more upset he has to work. so, he does the best he can to make the night special for her. warnings, kids/children word count, 1240 words (a little short, i know. but i promise it's sweet!)

(gif not mine)

Halloween, no matter how old you were, was your favorite holiday. When you were growing up, most of the other kid's favorite holiday was Christmas, not you. Maybe it was that your parents went all out, or maybe it was that they let you eat all the candy you wanted, but it left a lasting mark on you.

So, when you had your first daughter, her second Halloween (the first you really celebrated with her), you went all out. You and Ross dressed up as poppies and Poppy was a gardener. She had no idea what was going on but she found it hilarious that her parents were wearing weird big flower things on their heads.

Now, Poppy was four, and her little sister, Willow, was 10 months old. Poppy had inherited your love for Halloween and by August had her Halloween costume planned. She wanted to match with you and Ross which made you a little sad, knowing that Ross would have to work on Halloween.

When you did tell her he was working, she was sad but her mood brightened a little when you told her she could still dress up for the show.

She was very adamant about being Donkey from Shrek, so you did your best to make that happen. The band loved the idea of Shrek, so they each decided to follow in your daughter's footsteps and dress up as a different character and assigned themself different characters.

Poppy was Donkey, Willow would be Puss in Boots, Gabbriette would be the Fiona to your Shrek, Matty would be Lord Farquaad while George, Adam, and Ross would be the Three Blind Mice. John would be the Dragon, Jamie would be Pinocchio, Polly would be the Big Bad Wolf and Gabrielle would be the Fairy Godmother.

Poppy was completely oblivious to everyone's costumes and was just excited to get to dress up and eat candy all night.

On the day, you walked around Detroit and got her some candy from a couple of stores that were handing it out before you headed over to the arena for soundcheck, one of Poppy's favorite parts of the concerts. She got to go on stage and dance around with her uncle and dad.

Before the show, after Ross helped you dress the girls, and after he'd left to get himself ready, Gabbriette came in and watched the girls briefly while you got ready, and took pictures of you and the girls before Willow started to cry. You soothed her then slipped headphones onto both her and Poppy. Poppy's headphones had a pair of donkey ears glued on and Willow's had a pair of cat ears.

You heard the intro to the opening song and held Poppy's hand as you walked to the side of the stage where you watched the show. Willow sat in the baby Bjorn comfortably and watched from the stage with wide eyes.

"Mommy." Poppy gasped when she saw the band dressed up as the characters from her favorite movie.

"I know." You gasped with the same enthusiasm as you bent down to her level, "Look at Uncle Matty." You giggled with her when she saw what he was wearing.

Ross looked over to the side of the stage and waved at Poppy, who giggled and waved back shyly. Poppy couldn't stop smiling as she looked at the band's costumes.

Somewhere in the middle of the set, Matty finally addressed the crowd and addressed their crazy costumes, "Now, I know we look a little crazy right because we're missing our main characters, but I'll have you know this idea was formed because of my little goddaughter. She loves Shrek, and I mean, who doesn't?" The crowd cheered at that.

"So, the littlest MacDonald is Donkey and her mom is Shrek. Strange, I don't know how we got there, but here we are." He shrugged, keeping everything about your daughter vague because he knew you and Ross didn't want people knowing too much about Poppy or Willow, "So, anyways, everyone thank Donkey for this genius idea." Matty and Ross looked over to the side of the stage where Poppy was beaming at the sound of the cheers.

The rest of the show went on as normal and right before Ross turned off the lights, Poppy ran onto the stage and over to her dad, which sent the crowd into a frenzy because Little MacDonald, Donkey herself, was on stage. The lights were strobing so there wasn't a clear image of her face which was why she was on the stage in the first place.

Ross picked her up and carried her over to the giant light switch that would turn off the lights on the stage. He waited a few seconds before he gave her a nod and she pulled the lever, shutting the lights off on the stage.

He carried her offstage and once she was in the safety wings, she was off and running to greet her uncles and godfather. Ross removed Willow from the Bjorn, surprised that she was still awake because it was way past her bedtime.

Now baby-free, you gladly accepted the drink Gabbriette was handing you, "She's gonna be up a while, isn't she?" Ross asked.

"I'm hoping for a sugar crash," You smiled, watching George pick up Poppy and run around with her like an airplane, "You did amazing tonight, by the way." You nudged him.

"Yeah, I had a donkey and an ogre to impress." He teased.

"I'm gonna save the smack in the head for later because you're holding my baby." You narrowed your eyes at him.

"I love you, too." He wrapped an arm around your shoulder as you followed everyone else into whichever room would be used as the afterparty room.

You rolled your eyes, "I love you, too, even if you're mean to me sometimes." In response, he placed a kiss on your head.

When you made it to the room, Matty was standing outside with Poppy, who was pouting, "Why can't I go in?" She whined.

"It'll ruin the surprise, Pop." He explained, tapping her on the head, "You like surprises, don't you?" She nodded her head enthusiastically, "Then just wait a second." Poppy turned to you and frowned.

"Listen to your uncle, flower," Ross told her. She frowned and crossed her arms, "Just wait a second." He laughed.

A few seconds later, Matty opened the door and nodded over to Poppy, "Cmere." She skipped over to him, gasping when she saw what was in the room.

The best part of Halloween, in any kid's eyes, was trick-or-treating, and everyone knew that Poppy was a little upset she was missing it, so in the biggest room in the arena, everyone spread out with little bags of candy, creating a makeshift version trick-or-treating.

"Here's your bag." Matty handed her a big bag before tapping her on the head once more. She didn't need to be told twice before she was running into the room from person to person, gathering candy.

You looked over at Ross, who was smiling with pride, "You planned this, didn't you?"

"Halloween's her favorite." He shrugged, before producing your favorite candy bar from his pocket, "Like her mother's." He kissed your head again, smiling as Poppy giggled.

"You're amazing, Ross MacDonald, you know that?" You smiled up at him.

"Says you." He nudged you, smiling equally as big and squeezing your shoulder.

-

my taglist: @romanticingheroin @sadqn1 @befrwime @mattymybeloved @zzzhealy @fanaticalfantasist @thefrontofmymind @scooby-doodoo @because-she-goes @imogennjordan

add yourself to my taglist!

[longhairedboybracket]

Long Haired Boy Bracket All Contestants

The polls will start this tuesday the 2nd

Bracket A

1 - Ling Yao Fullmetal Alchemist vs Will Turner Pirates of the Caribbean

2 - Chigiri Hyoma Blue Lock vs Kasanoda Ritsu OHSHC

3 - Squidward Tentacles Sponge Bob Square Pants vs Link Legend of Zelda

4 - Heimdall Mcu vs Enoch Drebber Ace Attorney

5 - Izuru Kamukura Danganronpa vs Silver Pokémon

6 - Wei Wuxian Mo Dao Zu Shi vs Hua Cheng Heaven's Official Blessing

7 - Wataru Hibiki Ensemble Stars vs Akoya Gero Binan Koukou Chikyuu Bouei-Bu Love

8 - Su Honkai Impact 3rd vs Reyson Fire Emblem

9 - Vanitas Vanitas no Carte vs Athos 3 musketeers

10 - Destruction The Sandman vs Eliot Stardew Valley

11 - Neightan Rot Monster High vs Haruka Hashida Blue Period

12 - Kian Stone Just Roll With It, Show vs Aion Show By Rock

13 - Shulk Xenoblade vs Antonio Identity V

14 - Beelzebub Granblue Fantasy vs Kiun Noragami

15 - Alex Harvey-Iniguez Magical Warrior Diamond Heart vs Fabian Blush Blush

16 - Lord Cedric W.I.T.C.H vs Eithan Aurelius Cradle Series

Bracket B

1 - Korekiyo Shinguji Danganronpa vs Hong Lu Limbus Company

2 - Alucard Castlevania vs Finn The Human Adventure Time

3 - Sakurayashiki Kaoru "Cherry" Sk8 Infinity vs Rosado Fire Emblem

4 - Geralt Of Rivia The Witcher vs Elrond Lord Of The Rings

5 - Inigo Montoya The Princess Bride vs Fire Lord Zuko Avatar The Last Airbender/Avatar The Legend Of Korra

6 - Natural Harmonia Gropius "N" Pokémon vs Loki Mcu

7 - Samsom The Old Testament vs Aramis 3 musketeers

8 - Interdimensional Prince Monster Prom vs Furanui Binan Koukou Chikyuu Bouei-Bu Happy Kiss

9 - Ichirota Kazemaru Inazuma Eleven vs Lucas Rune Factory 5

10 - Helia Winx Club vs Gunpowder Tim The Mechanisms

11 - Shinjiro Nozomi Entropic Float vs Dia Akedia Court of Darkness

12 - Jareth The Goblin King Labyrinth vs Br'aad Vengolor Just Roll With It

13 - Little Creek Spirit vs Bigby Wolf Fables

14 - Terry Bogard Fatal Fury vs Prince Phobos W.I.T.C.H

15 - Dyuradyura Show By Rock vs Noah Kawaii Mansion

16 - Howell Wizard Bee and Puppycat vs Zero Megaman

Bracket C

1 - Inuyasha Inuyasha vs Lucius Fire Emblem

2 - Legolas Lord of the Rings vs Greg Universe Steven Universe

3 - Melli Pokémon vs Shatterstar Marvel

4 - Klavier Gavin Ace Attorney vs Lan Wangji Mo Dao Zu Shi

5 - Chewbacca Star Wars vs Cousin it The Addams Family

6 - Captain Hook Peter Pan vs Edward Elric Fullmetal Alchemist

7 - Tarzan Tarzan vs Razor Genshin Impact

8 - Gerard Keay The Magnus Archives vs Deidara Naruto

9 - Yan Qing Fate Grand Order vs Porthos 3 musketeers

10 - Yue Cardcaptor Sakura vs Headmaster Precure

11 - Kurama Yu Yu Hakusho vs Gillion Tidestrider Just Roll With It

12 - Sitka Brother Bear vs Lord Cob Tales Of Earthsea

13 - Kidou Yuuto Inazuma Eleven Go vs Takumi Ichinose Nana

14 - Peter Cook W.I.T.C.H vs Alec Swordspoint

15 - Peking Duck Food Fantasy vs Karurusu Binan Koukou Chikyuu Bouei-Bu Happy Kiss

16 - Blue Knight Tokyo Mew Mew vs Yakari Yakari

Bracket D

1 - Asakura Hao Shaman King vs Soren Fire Emblem

2 - Sesshomaru Inuyasha vs Christopher Yugioh Zexal

3 - Lord Farquaad Shrek vs Katsura Kotaro Gintama

4 - Jesus The Bible vs Sephiroth Final Fantasy VII

5 - Aoba Seragaki Dramatical Murder vs Basil Hawkins One Piece

6 - Kamui Gakupo Vocaloid vs Nahyuta Sahdmadhi Ace Attorney

7 - Jon Snow Game of Thrones vs Grusha Pokémon

8 - Terumi Furo "Aphorodi" Inazuma Eleven vs Joseph Identity V

9 - Nahobino Shin Megami Tensei vs Kite Hunter x Hunter

10 - Ogron Winx Club vs Niklaus Just Roll With It

11 - D'artagnian 3 musketeers vs Monmon Show by Rock

12 - Xie Lian Heaven's Official Blessing vs Olivier Vanitas no Carte

13 - Xiao Yin Dislyte vs Thane Bauer Watashi no Oshi Wa Akuyaku Reijou

14 - Toki Wartooth Metalocalypse vs Madmartigan Willow

15 - DJ Grooves A Hat In Time vs Jae-ha Akatsuki no Yona

16 - Nezumi No.6 vs Ashe Bradley Witch's Heart

[violetrose-art]

My Favorite Cartoon Villains

I decided to show off a list of various villains and bad guys from cartoons and animated movies who've really caught my eye. Now keep in mind, they're not in any particular order. What do you think? See anyone you like?

-Maleficent of Sleeping Beauty -Hades of Hercules -Emperor Belos of The Owl House -Riley Greene of Gremlins: Secrets of the Mogwai -King Goobot V of Jimmy Neutron: Boy Genius -Ooblar of Jimmy Neutron: Boy Genius -Professor Finbar Calamitous of The Adventures of Jimmy Neutron: Boy Genius -Meldar Prime of The Adventures of Jimmy Neutron: Boy Genius -Oogie Boogie of The Nightmare Before Christmas -Victor of Bling -The Shredder of Rise of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles -Falcon of Stuart Little 2 -Dr. Facilier of The Princess and the Frog -Toffee of Star vs. the Forces of Evil -Jafar of Aladdin -The Evil Queen of Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs -Krang One of Rise of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: the Movie -Professor Ratigan of The Great Mouse Detective -Maestro Forte of Beauty and the Beast: the Enchanted Christmas -Ursula of The Little Mermaid -Morgana of The Little Mermaid 2: Return to the Sea -Cruella De Vil of 101 Dalmatians -Captain James Hook of Peter Pan -The Joker of Batman: the Animated Series -Scarecrow of Batman: the Animated Series -The Mouse King of Barbie in the Nutcracker -Gothel of Barbie as Rapunzel -Preminger of Barbie as the Princess and the Pauper -Duchess Rowena of Barbie in the 12 Dancing Princesses -Rothbart of Barbie of Swan Lake -Rattlesnake Jake of Rango -Nightmare Moon of My Little Pony Friendship is Magic -Queen Chrysalis of My Little Pony Friendship is Magic -King Sombra of My Little Pony Friendship is Magic -The Lich of Adventure Time -Velma Green the Spider Queen of The Grim Adventures of Billy and Mandy -Rat King of Moon Girl and Devil Dinosaur -Mr. X of Amphibia -King Andrias of Amphibia -Bill Cipher of Gravity Falls -Plankton of SpongeBob SquarePants -Nefera de Nile of Monster High -Kieran Valentine of Monster High -Mother Gothel of Tangled -Dennis of The SpongeBob SquarePants Movie -Anti-Cosmo of The Fairly Odd Parents -Dark Laser of The Fairly Odd Parents -Mr. Crocker of The Fairly Odd Parents -Vicky of The Fairly Odd Parents -Moriarty of Sherlock Gnomes -Azula of Avatar: the Last Airbender -Circe of Hercules: the Animated Series -The Rat King of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles -Lord Farquaad of Shrek -Fairy Godmother of Shrek 2 -Dr. Blowhole of The Penguins of Madagascar -Queen Vexus of My Life as a Teenage Robot -Jack O'Lantern of The Grim Adventures of Billy and Mandy -Ben Ravencroft of Scooby-Doo and the Witch’s Ghost -King Magnifico of Wish -Lord Maliss of Snow White: Happily Ever After -Hexxus of FernGully: The Last Rainforest -Dr. Phillium Benedict of Recess: School's Out -Katz of Courage the Cowardly Dog

[the-great-bob-off2024]

let the bob-off commence!

submissions are closed, and we are ready to start round 1!

a few things to be aware of...

78 bobs have been submitted to the tournament, and the first round will consist of 39 matches

each matchup has been decided at random (some of them have put my beloved bob blorbos in dire situations but. we move) by a random name generator - I haven't selected the match-ups myself

each match will last for a week, and I will post two matches a day

you can still send bobaganda (bob propaganda) when the tournament is underway! stick up for your bob blorbos! each poll has a section for bobaganda, and if one of your faves' has been left empty, please help me out by sending some my way! you can even submit reasons that your faves bob should win if they already have bobaganda attached - you can never show too much love to your favourite bob!

enjoy the tournament, and bob speed to you all...

[underneath the cut, I have included the complete list of bob entries - tournament spoilers ahead!]

The Contestants!

Alexander Rozhenko (Star Trek: The Next Generation)

Amity Blight (The Owl House)

Anne Shirley Cuthbert (Anne With an E)

Anya Jenkins (Buffy The Vampire Slayer)

Armand (Interview with the Vampire)

B'Elanna Torres (Star Trek: Voyager)

Becky Botsford (Wordgirl)

Bruno Bucciarati (Jojo's Bizarre Adventure)

Buffy Summers (Buffy the Vampire Slayer)

Dr Charlotte DuBois (Falsettos)

Chris Noel (Dead Poets Society)

Christine Chapel (Star Trek: Strange New Worlds)

Christine "Lady Bird" McPherson (Lady Bird)

Colette Tatou (Ratatouille)

Dana Scully (The X Files)

Dora (Dora the Explorer)

Edna Mode (The Incredibles)

The Eighth Doctor (Doctor Who)

Elastigirl (The Incredibles)

Eleanor Levetan (Do Revenge)

Eliza Pancakes (The Sims 4)

Emma Frost (X Men)

Eurydice (Hadestown)

Fa Mulan (Mulan)

Go Go Tomago (Big Hero 6)

Haku (Spirited Away)

Han Sooyoung (Omniscient Reader's Viewpoint)

Helmeppo (One Piece)

Himiko Yumeno (Danganronpa)

Jane (Descendants)

Jenny Calendar (Buffy the Vampire Slayer)

Kathryn Janeway (Star Trek: Voyager)

Kira Nerys (Star Trek: Deep Space Nine)

Kit Kittregde (American Girl)

Komaru Naegi (Danganronpa) 

Lady Mary Crawley (Downton Abbey)

Lestat de Lioncourt (Interview With the Vampire)

Lindsey Bergman (American Girl)

Little Lad Who Loves Berries and Cream (Starburst Ad)

Lola Luftnagle (Hannah Montana)

Lord Farquaad (Shrek)

Lydia Deetz (Beetlejuice the Musical)

Mahiru Koizumi (Danganronpa)

Maria Von Trapp (The Sound of Music)

Mavis (Hotel Transylvania)

Mei Lee (Turning Red)

Mei Misaki (Another)

Monaca Towa (Danganronpa)

Mon Mothma (Star Wars)

Mystique (X-Men)

Nancy Downs (The Craft)

Nancy Landgraab (The Sims 4)

Poppy O'Hair (Ever After High)

Quinn Fabray’s blonde bob (Glee)

Quinn Fabray’s pink bob (Glee)

Quinn Fabray’s platinum bob (Glee)

Rapunzel (Tangled) 

Ruby Sunday (Doctor Who)

Sabrina Spellman (Chilling Adventures of Sabrina)

Sophie (Howl’s Moving Castle) 

Spock's ‘break up bob’ (Star Trek: The Motion Picture)

Stephanie (Lazy Town)

Suki (Avatar: The Last Airbender)

Tanya (Mamma Mia!)

Tashi Duncan (Challengers)

Taylor McKessie (High School Musical)

Tina Cohen-Chang - gaga (Glee)

Toralei Stripe (Monster High)

Tori Spring (Heartstopper)

Tracy Turnblad (Hairspray)

V (V for Vendetta)

Valeris (Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country)

Velma Dinkley’s live action bob (Scooby Doo)

Velma Dinkley’s animated bob (Scooby Doo) 

Velma Kelly (Chicago)

Willow Rosenberg (Buffy the Vampire Slayer)

Worf (Star Trek: The Next Generation)

Yuki Takeya (Gakkou Gurashi)