#sildar hallwinter

[fuckableoldmen]

Today's fuckable old man of the day is:

Sildar Hallwinter! He is (nearly?) 50 and fuckable!

[zizibutik]

one thing you need to know is that if there's a middle aged man in the adventure sourcebook he IS going to be naked/shirtless at one point

[ravenbohique]

These are some of the tokens I made for the Lost Mine of Phandelver token pack on roll20.

https://marketplace.roll20.net/browse/set/18283/lost-mine-token-pack

The pack contains tokens for every monster and enemy in the module as well as the major named NPCs from Sildar Hallwinter to Qelline Alderleaf.

[chacheep]

our dm made us roll disadvantage the rest of the night bc we drew fanart of sildar hallwinter pregnant :(

[comixandco]

ik that taako’s voice in the first episode was because justin was still figuring out his character but i like to imagine that before joining bob taako put on fake accents to avoid being recognised, since he was wanted for the whole poisoning incident, but also for the bit

and then kravitz changes accents mid-fight in crystal kingdom and then drops them during their date at the chug ‘n’ squeeze and taako’s like oh 😳 same hat 😳

[infernalcrypt]

i love dnd i love dming. my players are just starting wave echo cave and i planned a whole phase spider encounter and shit and instead they spent 15 minutes trying to configure themselves onto a minecart they found

[dooblewoop]

wip of my high elf bard who invented the d&d equivalent of 2000s punk rock. she plays air guitar and got the paladin addicted to drugs cause she was curious what would happen. she’s a spoiled asshole and I love her.

[theadventurezoneoftruth]

Billy Bluejeans: an incredibly stupid fan theory

Recently, I saw this post by @pocketsizedcrab .

But it got me thinking. "We met Billy too"? Who, exactly, did they meet?

The sensible answer is that "there is nobody in Faerun named Billy Bluejeans - this is just an extended goof that isn't meant to be canon".

But. The nonsensible answer.

We know that Faerun contained some of the same people from the Two Sun Planet - the extended way to explain away Gundren Rockseeker being Merle's cousin. So you could assume that Billy Bluejeans is also some extended Bluejeans family cousin. Case solved, right?

Unless...

If you subscribe to the fan theory that Barry's legal name is Sildar Hallwinter, as it was in the original adventure (Sildar > Darry > Barry, Bluejeans is a nickname that stuck)... You know what other name corruption you could get out of Sildar..?

Sildar > Silly > Billy... and a man's love for Bluejeans transcends dimensions...

Basically, what I'm saying is this: imagine you are Billy Bluejeans. And these 3 chucklefucks come up to you in Neverwinter and start talking about your brother, Barry - oh, they're so sorry for his loss! And you don't know what they're talking about, but you were always one to avoid conflict, so you smile and accept their condolences.

You are Billy Bluejeans. And it's the day of Story and Song. And you get blasted a story about how your alternate universe self went on an impossible journey and defied death itself and fell in love with the most wonderful woman in the world.

And you are Billy Bluejeans. From Neverwinter.

[leehallfae]

“sildar hallwinter does not stick in my head but barry bluejeans i’ll never—” don’t say forget. Do Not Say Forget

[theoraclephobetor]

One of the most sudden gut-punch lines upon restarting TAZ is Travis saying:

"Sildar Hallwinter doesn't stick in my head, but Barry Bluejeans I'll never forget"

Like I was looking for funny and comforting not 12d8 psychic damage dear fucking god

[fandomsnstuff]

Dirty Little Secret - fandomsnstuff - The Adventure Zone (Podcast) [Archive of Our Own]

I've officially joined the swaths of people who've posted absolute filth onto Archive Of Our Own Dot Org, so if you need me I'll be sitting at the grown up's table.

Word Count: 5k

Summary:

Barry has an OnlyFans under the name Sildar Hallwinter.

Lup knows that Barry Bluejeans is Sildar Hallwinter.

He doesn't know that she knows.

[anistarrose]

☔Is there a fic concept you have that you'd like to just explain and share because you're not sure you'll ever write it? If so, what is it? (From the writer asks, obvs. Also hello I hope you're having a good day!)

Hello, and I hope you're having a good day too! Regarding the fic I doubt I'll ever write, I have a very vivid murder mystery idea starring Angus McDonald and Barry Bluejeans. The reason I doubt I'll write it is because it's extremely long, for one thing, and also because the plot has just a couple of holes I have no idea how to fill in, but I would still love to tell you all about it:

basically, a young man named Aven, from a family that Angus did some low-stakes detective work for before, reaches out to him — having recently come into a large fortune, and also, a serious paranoia that others are out to get him. Aven, while being quite cagey about how he got all this money, invites Angus to a grand ball in his new mansion — a defunct museum that he bought with this fortune — where Angus will keep an eye out for treachery.

specifically, he's meant to keep an eye on four individuals Aven invited specifically so that Angus could suss out any ill intent. there's a lot of other folks around to provide cover, but Aven describes the four as people who "don't like me, or know my lethal allergies." they are:

his sister

a rival rich guy from Goldcliff

the ex-curator of the museum he bought

his primary care physician

also, Jeff Angel is there because Angus asked Aven to pay him in Jeff Angel autographs/meet-and-greets, and lastly, of course, a very nervous guy named "Sildar Hallwinter" (it's Barry) is there, because he broke into the mansion to investigate whether Aven had a Grand Relic. (not that amnesiac Barry understands it in those words. his coin just gave him a vague description of some assorted items to watch out for.)

in a coincidence that turns out to be very unfortunate for a lot of parties, Angus recognizes the name Sildar Hallwinter from some very well-respected theoretical necromancy papers, and he kind of geeks out asking "Sildar" about his research that Barry doesn't actually remember. and Barry is far from the person most screwed over by this happenstance, because when Angus is distracted... well, Aven gets a little stabbed to death, with no witnesses. Angus can't even assign alibis to anyone other than Sildar.

but the strangest part of all, that Angus just can't wrap his mind around? at the moment of the stabbing, every single person at the party — except Angus, Barry, Jeff Angel, and the four suspects Aven had suspicions of — just vanish into thin air without a trace, leaving those seven alone with a body and a whole lot of accusations.

and that is my pitch for my murder mystery, which I have dubbed...

Angus McDonald and the Death of the Party

[plain text: "Angus McDonald and the Death of the Party".]

again, I highly doubt I'll ever finish it, but I do have a little easter egg: I actually reused one of the four suspects (the baron, specifically) as a minor villain in a fic I have written, and will post soon >:)

[the-delicate-disaster]

@thebookwormgal commissioned art of our d&d party, The Illuminators, attending a ball held in their honor after slaying a white dragon.

From left to right: Snitskrit (goblin rogue) riding atop our stolen adopted pet drake, Zigyn; Creed Dalkon (tiefling cleric/rogue); Ramona Dalkon (half-elf cleric) and Sildar Hallwinter (human fighter).

Art done by DaeBosch

[thepringlesofblood]

fun little reference sheet for all the confused taz balance hoes out there

so you listened to all of taz balance and now you’re reading the graphic novel and whhaaaa these names are all different! or you started out reading the graphic novels and decided to give the podcast a try and are mixed up by who is what. have no fear.

This is a list of every difference and change in wording/names I could find in all of the graphic novels out so far - Here There Be Gerblins to Crystal Kingdom.

in case you didn’t know, the reason for all the changes is because when they started out the podcast, they were playing a pre-written campaign by Wizards of the Coast (the people who make the official DND stuff). It’s like, the basic starter kit campaign. They diverted from it pretty quickly, but the world they established in the podcast is basically the world of DND. and so, all of those names and places and spells belong to Wizards of the Coast.

So, they’re using alternate names for any official DND 5e material so they don’t get sued.

Sometimes the name is vague enough that they decide it’s fine to leave as is. e.g. levitate is still levitate. The only big one they break this rule on is zone of truth, and that’s for very good reason. I try to put when they keep the name the same for spells, since spells are the most common things that change.

Hence, I shall bring forth the list under the cut! Please let me know if you find any more!

UPDATE: now including mentions from The Eleventh Hour and The Suffering Game! the latter was really hard so please excuse the messy formatting. also I realized I previously included some pretty big Suffering Game spoilers on accident - I have done my best to change the wording to keep any spoilers relatively minor.

abbreviations:

HTBG = Here There Be Gerblins

MRL = Murder on the Rockport Limited

PTTM = Petals to the Metal

CK = Crystal Kingdom

11th hr = The Eleventh Hour

SG = the Suffering Game

LI = Lunar Interlude

the format we’re going with is

graphic novel name = podcast name

I’m trying to put the most important stuff near the top but no promises

People/places

G’nash = Klaarg

Eversummer = Neverwinter

Haverdale = Phandalin

Bogard Stoneseeker = Gundren Rockseeker

Caggle Stoneseeker = Tharden Rockseeker

Dorb Stoneseeker = Nundro Rockseeker

Yahvvie = yeemick

Queen Morior = the raven queen (I miss this I love the raven queen so much)

Cavern of dangling death = wave echo cave

The black spider is still just the black spider - I guess its vague enough that it works

fun fact: Barry Bluejeans starts out as just Sildar Hallwinter from the box campaign but they give him a better name first episode, bc they didn’t like how Sildar Hallwinter sounded. Obvs there’s no mention of Sildar in the book.

Sazed = Philippe (from 11th hr - not a copyright change, but a name change nonetheless. I don’t know why it’s not Sazed anymore, Glamour Springs is the same and both are original creations, not WoC property update: it’s because Sazed is a character from the Mistborn series so the boys & carey probably don’t want to chomp Mistborns’ flavor in their published graphic novel)

Spells (I’m also keeping track of which ones are the same btw)

ouch ray = magic missile (they acknowledge this one in the book)

zone of truth is still zone of truth

 idk how they got away with that one


shield of faith is still shield of faith 


strike divine = divine strike

some sources say this is an evocation cantrip, some say it’s a Life Domain feat. they may also have meant true strike, but I highly doubt it.

slowfall = feather fall

 later on in 11th hour gn, taako casts “Featherfall” with no issue (???)

celestial protector = guardian of faith

self-disguise = disguise self

dispel the dead = turn undead/destroy undead

the shattering = shatter

banish = banishment

shuffle jump = blink 

still “shuffle jump” in SG, although several other spells have switched to using their dnd names

dampen elements = absorb elements

blast of fire = scorching ray

later on in 11th hour gn, taako (or at least the umbrastaff) casts “Scorching Ray” with no issue (???)

magic rope = rope trick

sleepy-time = sleep

clair-vision = clairvoyance

diminish size = reduce

the spell is enlarge/reduce, and later on they use “enlarge” with no trouble - why is it “diminish size” here???

spirit steed = phantom steed

ethereal weapon = spiritual weapon

in 11th hr gn, it’s also called “armory of spirit”

gout of flames = fireball

blessings of the cherubim = prayer of healing

concussive force = concussive blast(?)

Taako uses this in the battlewagon race, but he just magic missiles the boar in the podcast

they probably wanted to spice things up a bit since magic missile kind of has a Brand.

Concussive blast is a real 3rd level evocation spell that Taako would’ve been able to cast, it just doesn’t actually happen in the podcast

levitate is still levitate

how is that one ok but “sleep” has to be “sleepy-time”??

word of healing = healing word

in SG pg 77 they say “healing word”, but before now it’s just been “word of healing”

ray of scorching oil = scorching ray(?)

we did already have that one but I can’t think of a better fit

discernment of magicks = detect magic

object location = locate object

flames of holiness = sacred flame

fire mitts = burning hands

wave of thunder = thunderwave

mystic analysis = probably meant as a stand-in for “identify”, but in the podcast he just does an arcana check.

burgle = knock

divine word is still divine word (which Merle changes to “divine wood” with the ring of the grammarian. this is the same b/w podcast & gn)

disintegration = disintegrate

cold snap = ice storm

truthful sight = true seeing

polymorph is still polymorph (SG pg 111)

arcane tether = magic jar

nature’s grasp = planar ally*

*the dnd 5e spell planar ally is a very different spell than what the listed effects of “nature’s grasp” are, but it is the spell used in the podcast at this particular juncture for this purpose. I would guess they changed it because technically speaking “planar ally” might not be able to do what happens in the podcast (it was a very rule-of-cool moment). either way, dope moment, very understandable change.

Spells cast that they don’t name in the book but are real 5e spells!

Taako uses “Mage Hand” on HTBG pg 135

Killian uses the feather duster to cast “Feather Fall” on HTBG pg 148

Merle casts “Light” on HTBG pg 160

it doesn’t say the name, but in PTTM pg 123 Taako casts “Crown of Madness” on the gerbil guy, which is a Horrifying spell

the crickets cast “Dominate Person” to control Taako in PTTM in case anyone’s interested.

I can’t fucking figure out what he meant by “ghostly voice” as a spell Jenkins used. My best guess is a modified use of “Magic Mouth”, or maybe “Minor Illusion”. Makes sense, Magic Mouth is only 2nd level and Minor Illusion is a cantrip, and Jenkins is a shitty wizard.

pg 11 SG - this is Scorching Ray (confirmed)

Angus uses “Mage Hand” several times throughout the SG gn (pg 174-175, 241), never with the little box that normally appears to explain spells, but Taako does compliment him on it and uses the term “mage hand”, so we know that’s what the spell is.

pg 191 SG Angus is likely using the spell “Detect Magic” here, since it shows you both the presence of magic and what school it’s from (e.g. illusion), and he mentions illusion magic specifically.

also on pg 191 SG Taako starts to cast “Dispel Magic” but is stopped.

pg 207 SG - Merle is casting “Divination” here

pg 214 SG - these are probably high-level Scorching Rays, but tbh that aint the part you should be paying attention to on this page lol

pg 236 Carey is actually using a racial feature all dragons and dragonborns have access to - Breath Weapon! since she is a blue dragonborn, she can breath lightning once every short or long rest!

on pg 247 of SG, a spell is cast that breaks a pair of handcuffs off of somebody’s wrists. this could be “Knock”, or a myriad of other spells, but I think “Knock” is the most likely, as it is specifically used for locks, chains, and bindings.

on pg 248 of SG, the spell “Command” is cast

not included in the books, but in LI V (Reunion Tour) pt 1 (which would be during the back half of the Suffering Game GN), Taako casts “Drawmij’s Instant Summons” during an interaction with Garfield. I would highly recommend watching/listening to this scene if you haven’t.

Spells that don’t (seem to) correspond to any dnd 5e spell

Merle makes up a spell called “refresca” in SG. it doesn’t correspond to a real 5e spell, to my knowledge, and I don’t think it’s supposed to.

pg 133 SG - “Maximum Healing” isn’t a dnd 5e spell, to my knowledge. though there are many healing spells in dnd, I don’t think any of them have the express purpose of bringing someone up to full. it’s usually based on dice.

Feats + other shit

CK - Pg 188 Magnus says “berserker blitz!” which is probably a translation of “reckless attack”

Know thy enemy = know your enemy (a feat Magnus gets for being a battle master archetype fighter)

Transmutation mastery = transmuter’s stone (a feat Taako gets @ 6th level for being a transmutation wizard) (probably bc one dangerous rock is enough lol)

destroy undead is a toughie

it’s technically not a spell (not in the way Merle is using it), it’s a use of Channel Divinity (a cleric feat), and while at first it’s called “turn undead”, when you reach level 5 you get to automatically destroy any low-level undead (each time you level up you can destroy one level up of undead), so the ability is called “destroy undead” from that point onward, but you still do the turning bit too, for undead that are higher level than your “destroy undead” threshold.

Ring of chilling frost = ring of frost

Loafers of leaping and springing = boots of striding and springing

Uncanny dodge (a rogue feat) is mentioned when Magnus is doing rogue training with Carey in the 11th hr gn

on their little ‘level up’ pages in the 11th hour gn, it says Magnus is a 10th lvl fighter and 1st lvl rogue, then lists Merle and Taako as a 10th level cleric and a 10th level wizard. that would mean Magnus is an 11th level character, while Taako and Merle are still 10th level. I’m pretty sure Magnus is 9th level fighter 1st level rogue (making him also a 10th level character) in the podcast, but I could be wrong. not super important.

thieves cant = thieves cant (not a spell but worth mentioning)

pg 205 SG Merle mentions that clerics channel their power through holy symbols, like his bible. this is true in dnd 5e, no wording change or anything.

pg SG pg 44 - they do level up in the podcast to level 12.

just a whole separate god damn paragraph for this one:

Murder on the Rockport Limited pg 189 - much going on here.

The text suggests that the spell is “spare the dying” but that’s a cantrip which Merle should have for free and Griffin says its a “5th level spell” but he means that Merle is only 4th level and he needs to be 5th level to cast this spell, not that the level of spell is 5.

At 5th level, clerics gain access to 3rd level spells, so I think he means that Merle can’t cast 3rd level spells since he’s only a 4th level cleric. So we’re looking for a 3rd level spell that clerics can use.

It could be two spells, and I’m pretty sure I know which one it is - Revivify. Technically it could also be Mass Healing Word but I think he’d have healed Taako too if that was the case, and if Magnus was Dead Dead (which I don’t think he was) it wouldn’t do anything.

death in dnd is weird. If you drop to 0 hit points, you are knocked unconscious (though colloquially this is often referred to as death). You then have to make death saving throws (roll a d20, no modifiers) - 3 successes you are stable, 3 fails you’re Dead Dead.

BUT

You die immediately if the damage you take minus the health you have left is more than your hit point total. So, if you go farther into the negatives than your hit point maximum, it’s insta death.

I don’t think this happened to Magnus. Angus survived the jump just fine. I think the boys misunderstood how death works bc it’s confusing. fair.

But the gist is Merle wants to cast Revivify, Griffin says he’s not high enough level, they convince him, even though it wasn’t really necessary in the first place.

this exchange does not occur in the podcast. Magnus falls unconscious and is healed with no problem.

a pattern I’ve noticed is as they go on, more and more things have their normal dnd names. lmk if you know why that is - maybe bc of the whole OGL/dnd one drama?

[fuckableoldmen]

can i please. please. sildar hallwinter.

He's fuckable 100%

Added to que