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#so many screams and jokes
enpr-ss · 3 months
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Impulse’s plot armor never fails (gets all the books and armor and kills the warden)
Tango is SO MEAN to Skizz and it’s the funniest thing ever (punching him, spleefing him, “I don’t need to be faster than the warden; I just need to be faster than you,” etc)
Skizz being skizz by taking every chance to make it PG-13 (“I’m going to beat the shift out of it!”)
Etho, seeing Tango suffering with the wardens in the Ancient City, enacting the most sadistic Simon Says: oh how the turns have tabled
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obsidianbit · 7 months
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I love this gay ass show with its literally life ending injuries that heal immediately, but only when convenient to the plot, and its ridiculous use of modern phrases, and its laughing in the face of historical accuracy, and its kissing the face of the fans instead of trying to outwit them, and the way everyone involved in the show seem to go 'I KNOW RIGHT! I'M EXCITED TOO!' instead of mocking the fans
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tomurakii · 6 months
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I like bloodweave. Okay. But I DON'T like the version of them in fanfic where Astarion is a dick and Gale is like. Whining and pleading for him to be emotionally vulnerable (or just. Nice to him) prior to the relationship being established. Because that is just not accurate. Gale needs the player to express interest in him during his weave-teaching scene before he even considers hitting on them properly. Gale is entirely resigned to his fate and needs someone else to pull him away from it. Gale only starts being sweet and romantic and devoted after you accept his love confession and give him hope for the future. Gale says fuck all and then slinks away to cry privately if you break up with him.
Like he isn't chasing after people lmao. He isn't dropping to his knees and crying about anything much less this dickhead he met a week ago. He is overwhelmingly passive about literally everything personal to him up to and including his own death (provided there are no casualties/there is a good reason) until after the player expresses that they care about him. Astarion is not doing that in any of these fics.
Like Gale is friendly and a dork and doesn't wanna get murdered but he fully has a suicide plan. He thought the artefacts would help him survive but he didn't believe he'd ever truly live again. If Gale confessed and Astarion said/did like one (1) mean thing afterward Gale's romance is closed off forever. He's wandering into the forest to cry. He's killing himself immediately. His fragile ego and self worth can't take it. You have to understand that when we joke about him being pathetic it's not bc he's like. Sopping wet and chasing people down and begging for a scrap of attention. It's because he craves affection but would literally rather die than ask or even hope for it until someone else forces that hope back into his serotonin-deficient tadpole brain.
#i feel like u can tell when a bloodweave fic is written by an astarion stan vs a gale stan lol#because the astarion stans are just using gale as a vessel for like. their sopping wet meow meow#who screams and cries until astarion becomes emotionally vulnerable with them#which gale would not do. realistic bloodweave is astarion tries to fuck him in act 1 and he refuses because of the orb#and then astarion is like “boo what the fuck. change of plans” and gale is like “okay” and they never speak of it again lol#anyway#please god the gale characterisation in this place. half of you make him the soppiest most pathetic loser and the other half make him evil#he's not ACTUALLY a loser. when i joke about it the reason its funny is because its not true#hes just a regular guy with depression lol. hes not out here debasing himself begging for some old twink to care abt him#bg3#gale dekarios#bloodweave#gale of waterdeep#does this make sense. i havent slept#i just mean that if you want gale to be sappy he needs to have like. prior assurance that his feelings are reciprocated#because if he doesnt have that and astarion is a dick to him he WILL just give up on the relationship#like hes not hunting people down after they deliberately upset him. i see so many fics where they create tension by lime#*like#having astarion openly fuck someone else after establishing a sort-of relationship with gale. for the drama#like hey. gale fully dumps you if you do that in game!! you have no way to convince him not to. he will dump astarion for that permanently
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formulapisces · 7 months
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reblog or <horrific thing will happen to parent>
reblog to get <specific amount of money>
reblog for <luck and something about a crush>
reblog if you aren’t <racist, homophobic, etc>
reblog or else <terrible tragedy happens>
reblog if you care about <obviously a good cause but is baiting you to look like a horrible person if you don’t reblog it>
SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT UP
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todayisafridaynight · 2 months
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yarrowleef · 7 months
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hey, hold up, hang on
I was doing some random wiki research about Midnight, and I came across this???? apparently there were bonus info videos released with The Last Hope's ebook?
look, this is decade old info, and maybe everyone already knows and stopped caring years ago but like??? I don't think I knew this?? this is news to me!!!
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youtube
time stamp 1:00 - 2:10
Midnight was supposed to be the twist villain for OotS?? are u kidding me so much of why I remember the last Hope being anticlimactic is because nothing interesting happened, the bad ghosts had been saying "we're going to do a big attack" for books and books, and then they just did that big attack exactly as we had been told and it was the same as any other Big Battle scene and there wasn't really any more interest to the plot. This kind of plot twist might have actually added something interesting to that book!
And Vicky makes it sound like she had this plan for a long time? it was even going to tie back to Midnight secretly having a hand in the badger attack in arc 2?
THIS!? This is why she told Sol that info about the eclipse?? and then never explained why??? Like!!!! is this why Sol was Like That!?? a guy set up to be a big mysterious deal, but then he didn't really do anything and just fizzled out of existence??? because he was conceived of for an idea that was scrapped before going anywhere, but he was already sort of part of a (presumably already started) plot mid PoT so it was too late to cut him 'cause they still needed SOME minor antagonist there to fill pages, right? .... but he had no where to go and no (good) reason to do anything, no ending, since HIS BOSS, his Motive, suddenly stopped existing as a concept??? bro??? no wonder his random tie to SkyClan felt so unfitting as a reasoning for this kind of villain
Erica!! Erica wtf!! I don't care if it felt absurd, absurd is better then underwhelming! so what if Midnight was nice and helpful to some cats, maybe she has complex feelings about certain clan cats despite still secretly wishing to unleash chaos on the society as a whole for personal reasons, heaven forbid there be a complicated villain :'(
anyway I am going to be thinking about this lost timeline forever.
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notemaker · 4 months
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Okay so Sonic Prime was basically a weird game of seven minutes in heaven, right? Kissing may not have been involved but everything else sure was.
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personinthepalace · 2 months
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Odd Squad agents in Tiny Time Travel and Dino Dana -> thanks to @serendertothesquad for the heads up!
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chimerahyperfix · 26 days
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RECIPE OF THE DAY
[OR: This was the most upsetting alternate looper option]
Long post because i have been cooking this in my brain for like, two months, and it's all-consuming. Also I'm not in the Discord yet because Anxiety so my ramblings had to go somewhere, and what better than one big fucking post yknow. I cast spell of fuck you mind blast on the tag/lh /j
TLDR for below: Siffrin words his wish differently, Bonnie gets trapped in a time-loop, and despite saying they're in a timeloop repeatedly nothing works and no one can help them. The normal ISAT absolute horrors ensue.
CONTENT WARNINGS: the normal ISAT tags [death, violence and trauma, suicide, self harm and unreality], Notable Pin on child endangerment and death, poisoning.
most of these get discussed ^ even if shortly
SO. THIS AU.
This is it this is my big one. Ignore me pushing the literal 12 other isat aus I have into a pile pls this is THE big one. I’m looking at the note I’ve stored all this lore in on my notes app,and it’s like. 35 fucking pages?
I've looked at a ton of alternate looper aus [that's part of the hyperfixation babeyyyy I need to consume ALL content forever and ever and ever] and I was like “oohhhh I wanna do that!!” So I literally just listened to music until I caught an idea and yikes. Looking at the AUs playlist now [it’s about 100 songs! Oops!] and I’m like [cartoony image of me laying face first on the floor]
This is a bit scattered because I wrote it over 3 days instead of working on the fic I’m supposed to be writing ooopsieeeee. Ramblings belowvvvvvvvvvv
It begins as simply as the game does. No one knows how to wish properly; so Siffrin wishes, because they know how to. The same folded leaf, repeated three times wish. Close to what is said in canon; different enough for the Universe to read it differently. No longer does Siffrin loop, because the wish isn’t about him, it’s about Bonnie and their sister. Siffrin’s wish is construed as “I wish Bonnie’s wish would come true,” and even if the Universe can’t hold onto Bonnie’s wish as they did it wrong, it CAN hold onto Siffrin’s.
And that’s the base point: EVERY LOOP, Siffrin wishes, because he wishes after he talks to them and that's where they loop back to, and its wish craft goes to Bonnie. A recipe for disaster with how much time they have!
They loop back when Siffrin gets crushed by the rock, because they can’t win while being down a party member. When they touch a tear, or when the sadnesses get the jump on the party and they all go down, or when they use the dagger equivalent [a poisoned snack], or when they get to the King. They Never Beat The King. Think SASASAaP but ISAT.
Bonnie doesn’t fight with craft, but rather craft-infused weapons. The wok and their pan for rock, a pair of kitchen shears for scissors and a cookbook for paper. Snacks for healing and buffs. And they have a cool friend that lives in the favor tree! [they get in fistfights like every five loops. Maybe it would be funny, someone just as willing to spar with them instead of trying to find the right words they can’t find because they’re a kid, if their friend wasn’t ALSO another version of themself, which bonnie clocks pretty late.] They pick up little quirks from their friends, like biting their nails like Belle, and puffing up to look bigger like Isa and stealing Dile's curses and closing an eye to match Frin's in focus. And maybe they start forgetting a little bit, just a little! The same thing over and over will get to you.
So everything essentially boils down to this. Bonnie specifically needs to be strong enough to beat the King, as the rest of the party doesn’t keep experience through loops. For a good chunk of the loops, they take advantage of Siffrin asking them if they need help and drag him into a training lesson that slowly goes from a whole emotional conversation to them quietly listening to Siffrin’s every word. [Siffrin fills this silence with random star facts that pop into their mind. This Is Important It WILL Be On The Test] Eventually the training becomes too tedious, so they start sneaking off to go fight sadnesses— and eventually just punch trees, which busts their knuckles— to get stronger faster! Everything goes downhill from there, with them forgetting to make food to them sneaking out at night to fight more to them getting reckless and uncaring; it snowballs down into “oh this could be considered suicidal confidence”.
Every loop, you say "hey, I'm trapped in a time loop", and EVERY time it is a big emotional thing that exhausts you to the point of going to bed immediately after, and everyone gets antsy and worried, and in the end the anxiety and trouble NEVER ends up mattering because the King still flattens the party every time. [And (shuffling through the sea of my notes for the au), imagine this from their situation for a second; Today, you tell your friends you are trapped in a time loop. They drag you into a long, uncomfortable conversation that makes you cry, and you go to bed with a full stomach and the knowledge they will protect you, and you will protect them. You make sure he doesn't get squashed by a boulder, you make sure they find the key, you make sure they don't die. Tomorrow, you will tell your friends you are trapped in a time loop. They will drag you into a long, uncomfortable conversation that will make you cry, and you will go to bed with a full stomach and the knowledge they've failed to protect you, but they're trying this loop, and you'll still protect them anyway.]
And then the King fight. He grabs them and he kills them and it fucks them up. [it fucks them up, until it too happens again and again, and eventually it simply is just another obstacle you must pass, because the second his stupid hand wraps around you like a ragdoll it’s over, so you just spit in his face to make him press the trigger immediately and not drag it out for forever- imagine the most traumatic event in your entire life, repeated over and over, until it looses all meaning. It’s still traumatic, it’s sewn into your brain forever you will never forget this.]
They tell the party ‘hey, I just got murdered’, and if this au was ISAT, it would go from having a memory that gave everyone a defense buff to a memory that literally stops you from winning, randomly attaching to a party member. You couldn’t get rid of it. They’d take every hit for you, and you’d have to loop back, because you couldn’t win with an unremovable memory like that. and that’s why they stop saying things, because if the people you loved would die to protect you, something you don’t want and have the ability to stop, would you stop them?
And so everything collapses, and from that point [the start of act 4] it collapses fast.
WHICH LEADS US TO ENDLESS MY FAVORITE LITTLE THANG
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if this is transparent or not I don’t fucking know and honestly. After 2 hours of fighting ibisPaint X to make it transparent I stopped caring. o7
Slight design notes tangent: the fucking. Wispy things around their limbs just kinda move around them- yknow because black holes pull things in and they are one. Their like,,,, face spike design??? Question mark on what 2 call it? It’s designed to look like their hair lol. The little star-dot things on their knuckles are important smile. Eventually I’ll post a full thing 4 them (I have like 2 pages of random doodles of them it’s craaazy)
Endless (or Ness, later on) is Bonnie’s loop-alike. They’re a little angry hater and I based them on the song Black Hole Sun [therefore they double-dip in the space theming, the little scoundrel! Imagine being both a black hole and a partial eclipse!! Damn why you taking all the space theming for!!] which was the song the whole AU was based on! Woah! Damn you carrying ALL the out of AU lore in you! They’re anger over fear while Bonnie is fear over anger.
They make me SO fucking upset. Like. I’m not being funny anymore. This is THE most upsetting character I’ve ever written. They make me cry. My entire schtik is making horror and this little creature is the most upset I've ever been at a creation of mine.
Endless is a Bonnie who, without exaggerating, literally imploded from having too much wish craft in them— hence the black hole theme. They went through an unreasonable amount of loops [i think I noted down 400??? Probably not that many, but hey, leveling is slow when half the time you rely on a scripted event that has like 3 enemies. Never really pinned anything down, but it’s a CRAZY upsetting amount.] and just couldn’t win,, and they eventually broke, and begged for it to stop— and, well, with so much wish craft in them, even without the proper rituals the Universe just couldn’t ignore ALL this wish craft, overflowing, in one spot. They asked for help and it killed them.
And then they were at the tree! And they’re helping a DIFFERENT Bonnie, who they’re upset at because what. What why is this happening? They asked for it to stop, not for a whole NEW Bonnie to exist and to do it all over again, what is this what, stop stop it. And they have to keep watching Siffrin wish, and doom them to their endless loop, and they have to tell Bonnie no, the party can’t help them like they want the party to do because the party never could help them, and it’s just going to bring them distress and heartache. Bonnie does it anyways, until the very beginning of act 4: it goes downhill from there, until they’re worried This Bonnie will end up like THEM.
They’re not the most self-confident type. They give themself the most un-nicknameable name [Bonnie still finds one that fits— Ness. They reluctantly accept it.] [Endless vc: Ness? Like? From Earthbound???] they can think of because nicknames are a love language and they speak it, and they don't think they deserve it anymore because they've Changed, and trade out the nicknames they have for the party for things they learned from Siffrin in their own many many training loops: The Sun, The Moon, The Star, The Sky, and Bonnie is Supernova, because its cool as hell and Siffrin told them that’s what happens when a star dies, and they died. Open foreshadowing. They take to closing the same eye they made Siffrin the Star loose, because if he doesn’t get to see anymore neither should they— even if that eventually becomes a natural thing, something they do now to focus. They talk about a sister they have— had, because their world is gone and she never got unfrozen, they never learned if she was alive under all that icy craft or not, and they’re not Bonnie anymore. Ness is Bonnie, but Bonnie is not Ness.
And so, when act 5 hits, they’re desperate. They can’t see it happen again, because it erased them as a person and it was terrifying enough why would you want to see it happen again? they prepare to storm the house, bevause theyre strong enough to tear it apart themself, get stopped by the party, and essentially they’ve replaced Bonnie for a loop; which would be okay, if failing didn’t mean there would probably be Two Endlesses and No Bonnie’s. By the end of the au, Bonnie, lvl 99, is like bringing a brick to a stare down. Endless, in comparison, is like bringing a bazooka to a fistfight. They can’t face the King, they can’t, it would probably mess something up [the party has them pinned as being a kid by this point— wether they realise Ness acts a lot like Bonnie or not, who knows] so they panic and wave the party off into the King’s room and fights off the remaining sadnesses to calm down.
And the Party brings Bonnie down, and they fight a fake version of their sister [who they win against, even if barely, because Nille is their sister and damnit, Nille would never hurt them, not after giving up her life for them] and they have a breakdown, and then there's two of them. There's Bonnie and there's Ness. Bonnie confronts them and they get in ANOTHER fistfight, bveause how else would two angry ultra-powerful preteens settle things, and Bonnie convinces them to come along, because their identity has been found out and damnit Nille really won't care, Ness is her sibling too.
[Nille approaches the situation carefully, but Bonnie is right: Nille sees the two of them and immediately decides she has two siblings and she wants to protect them. Both of them went through so, so much, and they saved the country and damnit it would be monstrous to throw Ness out to the wolves because they Changed. Aka I was physically incapable of letting Ness dissapear or have a bad ending they deserve the world too.]
I just I jsutt. Auguhghghghhh. au too big in my brain spill it out on the floor it goes everywhere. When you hyperfix on your own au
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wikoymi · 2 months
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akechi (and some jokers) which all have the same exact pose for some reason
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alpacacare-archive · 6 months
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Deltarune.com/egg/ talks about noelle getting a white egg in cat petterz 2, the egg wont hatch and she couldn't throw it away no matter how many times she tried, all it did was make a weird sound when interacted with. This is an exact description of the white egg we get from the man behind the tree. After she took care of it like a regular pet in the game it suddenly disappeared with the message "pet left home due to happiness" when it usually says it left due to sadness if neglected. It was loved and happy, then disappeared. The egg had a name but no matter how hard she tried she couldn't remember what it was. The egg had a name but no matter how hard she tried she couldn't remember what it was. The egg had a name but no matter how hard she tried she couldn't remember what it was.
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Okay, but. SWK Truth serum au. Imagine him being forced to communicate. Comedy, hurt/comfort, and finally clearing up, well, everything. I’m not sure where I’m going with this, sorry. Have a great day, bye!
“You know who broke the toaster, Monkey?”  The word “yes,” was pulled out feeling forced and unpleasant.  Pigsy looked like he already knew the answer before he asked. Wukong wasn’t sure why he bothered asking at all.  “Who?”  “I did.”  “Of course…” Pigsy pinched the bridge of his snout and sighed before looking at him, brows furrowed with some familiar annoyance that made Wukong’s hands twitch. “Mystic Monkey strength and all that I bet.”  Not a question so Wukong just gave him a forced smile instead of answering. He glanced away to look over at where Mei and Mk were arguing over whether it was sane to put butter on plain bread without toasting it first.  “Nothing to say for yourself?” Pigsy asked after a long moment of silence.  “No,” the words slid out, unraveling, too many.  It made him lightheaded the more he said, not unlike the feeling that came with blood loss. Dizzying and empty. Every word took something with it as it left him. “It never matters what I say.”
Anon you have no idea how desperately I want to write an entire fic about this, I have been thinking about this constantly since you sent this ask bKL;SDMAFAOWEF
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mintjeru · 4 months
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hamelin and mhy are feeding us so damn well this lunar new year
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hkpika07 · 1 year
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Whistle Wednesday drawings this week!
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heaven-zent · 2 months
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Golly I can’t wait to fight the High Roller fourteen more times At least
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radsplain · 11 months
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being a younger lesbian in your 20s and 30s is actually insane rn because not only is our dating pool small enough as it is (especially for lesbians who only want to date other lesbians) but then we’re also having to contend with the fact that half of the lesbians around our age are going by they/them or they/he pronouns and like kudos to y’all who can maintain relationships (hell, even friendships) with people who require you to deny base reality every time you’re around them or even reference to them when they’re not even in the room but like. i can’t pretend to indulge in it, like not even for a little bit. and i really do feel like this is actually a real issue and has so many implications for the lesbian community as a whole and how it really is disappearing right before our eyes, all in just a matter of a few years etc but all that is to say! we need to free young lesbians from the shackles that is gender now before i go completely insane and end up single forever
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