#so to make up for it i'll be doing thursday and friday tasks today!

[tealcrush]

Anybody out there with chronic pain and depression/ADHD got any advice for getting the house under control by yourself? I can't stand for long periods of time, and depending on what I'm doing the most I can manage physically is about an hour before I'm in so much pain I can't stand anymore. That's if I even have the mental and emotional energy to start in the first place.

My partner works five days a week and my teenager is busy with extracurricular stuff when he's not at his other parent's house. I'm the at home person. I'm the one in charge of cleaning up after an entire household of people with autism/ADHD and on top of that we have pets. We made this decision because working was killing me and it cost us more money for me to work minimum wage than to stay home.

However. I am lonely as fuck. I'm constantly in pain. My mental health is completely untreated and running amok. I will kill myself getting the kitchen almost cleaned and then somebody else will come in and pile trash on every surface and use every single pot and pan to make something that only needs one and leave them for me to deal with. Pots and pans takes me hours. I have to stop and sit down after every. single. one. Or my back locks up and I'm done for the day.

I have at least a year's worth of filth to clean up and I don't know where to start or how to keep it from being destroyed before I can do the next thing. I mow the yard on Mondays. Mostly riding mower but we have a small fenced section that has to be push mowed. It takes me hours to catch my breath and cool down afterward and inevitably I have a migraine Tuesday and spend the day in bed or my recliner. Regardless of water or Gatorade or whatever. Thought it was dehydration but it happens when I drink like a gallon too.

So Monday I mow. Tuesday I'm down for the count. Wednesday I have to go to the grocery, probably still with some of tuesday's headache on board. Saturday and Sunday my partner wants me to hang out with him. That leaves Thursday and Friday for anything else I want to get done. It's just so much.

I use a grabber to get things off the floor so that my back will last longer, and have one of those standing dustpans like they use at restaurants and theaters so I don't have to bend to sweep. I've been thinking of getting a stool to sit on while I do dishes. Does anyone use a stool for that? What height is good for the kitchen sink? Anyone have any actionable ideas that aren't "pace yourself. write things down. ask for help." Like, stuff I can actually do?

All I've landed on is take a room a week, but that doesn't account for the several days a week I can't do anything and the fact that I don't live alone and the house gets destroyed faster than I can clean it.

I'm so tired and frustrated. I can't stop feeling guilty about not being able to do these things while my partner is out working a full time job and the most I can manage to do is pack his lunch and make sure he can find his keys. I'll be lying in bed thinking "ok brain feels good right now today I'm going to do A Task", and then I get out of bed and I'm in so much pain that doing The Task is a real funny joke.

That got long, sorry.

[that-fellow-from-dres]

Slight vent inbound you have been warned

I do too much shit I have like. No time for anything ever aaaaaaaaaaaaaaàaaaaaaaäa

Honestly I need to get out of some of it but goddamn it I cannot bear the social tribulations and some of it's going to be done soon so... I will simply continue

This is what happens when you multiclass in extracurricular shit. like. Aaaa I have been roped into so many things like tomorrow is going to be painful because I am spending most of the day with my parents' friends who are pretty cool and we're all meeting up for some thing at a farm and then later a pre-christmas dinner. But I have to pack my viola in the boot (trunk) of our car because halfway through I have go to school because I'm rehearsing playing some of the musical interludes in a school drama performance thang for two hours before then shooting off early to catch the second half of the Social Engagement. Should be ok because is Food but damn it won't be fun.

Monday is much the same with me actually having to forgo one of my usual ensemble practices to then go to somewhere in the city centre to rehearse in a string quartet who have two performances in a primary school on Wednesday. Before then leaving that early for the first performance of the drama I mentioned before. I am not going to have a fun time. Tuesday is my respite day, I have D&D with epic folks then. But I don't really get to rest because I have to finish a history essay that should have been done on Friday and arrange a piece of music for four performers. Wednesday is the string quartet performance as mentioned earlier, so I'll need to carry both my viola and my swimming kit around for Games afterwards, Thursday is mostly chill and I have my bassoon lesson during break, but it also has my first free period of the week so that's cool. Friday is when my viola lesson is happening and I'll be honest I have not had the chance to practice any of my pieces I am unlikely to reach grade 7 by the end of the year. I also have to perform as one of the musicians in the four part piece I wrote on Tuesday and probably in the four part pieces of some of my associates. After school I get chill at my mate Harry's house for a bit, which is always fun but afterwards is my big outside-of-school orchestra which lasts until half 8 and that just about ends my week. If I'm lucky I'll get some semblance of a rest in 7 days time but my god through all this the homework's gonna be piling up and I've gotta clear it some time. I didn't even manage to finish the physics work I intended to today because damn it the Task requires I concentrate on something for more than 5 seconds and I didn't allow for the 2 hours it takes between sitting at my desk saying 'Right. Let's get this physics done' and actually starting to work on it. Bugger me amontillado the storm is coming I will see you lovely people on the other side

was gonna make a post about the first episode of the new Dr who thing but I need to sleep now so goodnight gamers

[thatseventiesbitch]

Hi! I hope this isn’t too weird. I know you work with high school students, so you might be able to help. Do you have any tips to get motivated? I find myself struggling to do my assignments— even the easy ones that take less than an hour.

Thank you for helping if you see/answer this.

Hello! No problem. I am happy to put on my school counselor hat for a moment. 🤠

First, my dear - you need discipline, not motivation. And do not feel bad - you're not the only one who struggles with task initiation and/or procrastination. It's highly, highly common - even in adults. That's why building skills and habits that work for you now, as a high schooler, will serve you well.

A few tips/tricks I go over with my students:

If you have long-term projects or assignments, map out mini-deadlines for yourself along the way so it doesn't feel as overwhelming and you don't ever get into a situation where you have to like, write a 20 page paper in one afternoon (i.e. I'll write the introduction paragraph today, have the first two body paragraphs done by Tuesday, then add the conclusion on Thursday, then review the essay before I turn it in on Friday)

When you sit down to work on a task you don't like (i.e. math homework) give yourself a chunk of time - for instance, I will work on this for an hour and a half. When the hour and a half is up, I will [be finished for the day/take a brain break/move on to a different task]. Give it your all for the time you've dedicated to the task, and then when the timer is up, let yourself walk away even if it is not complete. You can come back and do more tomorrow. (The kicker is that a lot of the time you are so close to finishing anyway, that you just decide to wrap it up.)

Take brain breaks! Breaks between tasks. It's important to get up, physically move around, and to look away from the computer screen/notebook/textbook you've been so intensely concentrating on. Take care of your human needs. Do a little high energy dance party. Pet an animal. Get outside. Although sometimes my brain breaks end up being permission to scroll the internet/tumblr/reddit/tik-tok/what-have-you for ten minutes before I get back to the grind.

Do what you can to make study time/your study space feel welcoming/inviting/a place you want to be. For some kids, studying with a friend in a coffee shop all afternoon is what works. Some need to be alone, but like to have certain music/podcast playing or a certain snack they only get for themselves when they study. I've even had some kids tell me they like to scroll through, like, study blogs/study aesthetics to get them in the right mindset before they start.

If you don't already, use some sort of an assignment notebook or write out the list of assignments you have to complete. Put a checkbox next to each one, and cross it off when you complete it. Sounds silly/minor, but your brain gets a little shot of dopamine each time you do, and that feeling is exactly what will keep you going!

Additionally, I like to share this story from one of my favorite books of all time - Bird by Bird by Anne Lamott:

"Thirty years ago, my older brother, who was ten years old at the time, was trying to get a report on birds written that he'd had three months to write. It was due the next day. We were out at our family cabin in Bolinas and he was at the kitchen table close to tears, surrounded by binder paper and pencils and unopened books on birds, immobilized by the hugeness of the task ahead. Then my father sat down beside him, put his arm around my brother's shoulder, and said, "Bird by bird, buddy. Just take it bird by bird."

To this day, this is the phrase I tell myself when I feel overwhelmed and/or immobilized by the task in front of me - "Okay, let's take it bird by bird." Aka, just start. Aka, one thing at a damn time. Aka, the only way forward is forward.

[applecorething]

it's gonna be so sub zero tomorrow morning. gonna be crazy cold. -9C. that's cold babey

I fed a crow today v close up. he was ringed so i guess he's prob not as scared of humans but still it was nice to hang out very near a crow for a while.

i had a crazy week or so just there. after all the silence of christmas jumped right in to hosting across friday to wednesday, and new job is really full on and demands more of me at the edges of my ability. it will get easier as i learn the ropes but it's intimidating to need to make the plan for this new programme but still be figuring out what's my responsibility, what depth of detail i need to go into for everything, how i can use my skills best. i'm trying my best but it's more mental load than if i was given a clear but challenging task - i'm trying to figure out what the task is while i'm also trying to do it. i've to host a meeting on thursday for a group whose remit was decided before i started, but I have to write the document explaining that remit and no one seems to be able to explain it to me v well.

anyway i'll figure it out. i've been in this industry long enough to know that even well paid people in important positions are often winging it, and it's very allowed to ask a bunch of questions and figure out where you are and what you're supposed to be doing, or what would be most useful for u to do. i'm so sleepy tho

i've a gap in my journal which indicates to me that my brain has been full, and likely there are some gaps in some other parts of my life. food fell off a cliff a little bit, but i'm keeping my head above water with it. today i found myself scrolling loads on my phone which i haven't rly done since start of december when i got off all social media. sleep has been bad which is also an indicator than my brain is full, and that i'm fatigued. weird how being too tired to sleep is a thing for toddlers and also for me. probably should work on sleep hygiene. put my phone on the other side of the room so my alarm rly wakes me and i don't snooze for hours. go to bed early and read even and especially if i feel too tired to read. like girl if ur too tired to read then go to fuckin sleep.

i've not been takin any photos of myself recently, even tho i have been lookin stun. i don't rly know why but i'm noting it. i'm trying to mark my delights each day and share them, maybe i should take a photo of myself when i'm happy as well, to mark it. when i'm watching the sunset or smth. i do love a sunset. sky has been so pink these days. hopefully more in the snowy days to come.

that's all

[neon-rhapsodies]

As foretold, stayed home today. Managed to get a first draft of my student reports done. It's crap, but it's better than nothing. Technically I have until Friday before they need to be submitted, but realistically, I want to have them done by 12pm on Thursday at the latest. I've tried doing that thing of giving it my very best when doing the task, and even then I still ended up taking way longer than expected to do this, even though I was using a template with a fair amount of repetition. It's just tough. It's a dry, dull task. Only managed to pick up the pace with a bit of music in the background. Overall I'm happy with how I handled myself, but it just shows that things take longer than you expect and it's better to assume the worst and make a contingency plan on any task. Looking at the time, I don't know if I'll manage to get everything I wanted done today. I didn't quite plan it with extra time in mind, or backwards etc. I don't know. I know that I really want to get done. So I guess I'll focus on that.

[hotasfahrenheit]

i don't think i have 15 people to tag but i'll still answer these 15 questions and with answers that are probably way too long to make up for it 🌟

1. are you named after anyone?

not that i've ever been aware of, tho all three of my siblings -both younger and older- are named after family members or family friends. i've never heard a story about where my name comes from, so my assumption has always just been that it was chosen because mum's family was Polish Catholics (Mia is short for Maria but i'm very far from being anything other than a white girl)

2. when was the last time you cried?

it's Sunday today yeah? so probably like Thursday or Friday while having too many emotions about *something*. i am a giant crybaby and get emotional and cry about things all the time honestly so it's not that big of a deal when i do and not worth taking note of 🤣 Saturday i spent at work for 9 hours then immediately on a 7 hour road trip where i slept a bunch so no crying yesterday but before that it could have been any time really.

3. do you have kids?

only friends that i've adopted. going from the nickname Mia to lots of friends calling me Mama Mia was entirely too easy and i'll mom at them all 💖

4. what sports do you play/have you played?

the only time i've ever willingly been on a sports team was when i played youth soccer in elementary school, it was just teams of kids from mixed grades all from my school and we got free tshirts and there was an ice cream social at the end of the whole program and honestly those were my motivating factors for playing (and i was bad at it)

5. do you use sarcasm?

who me no never

6. what’s the first thing you notice about people?

their general attitude and vibe

7. what’s your eye color?

hazel, in the blue/grey/green variety, and they look like they change depending on what colours i'm wearing

8. scary movies or happy endings?

happy endings for sure, i will like... read plot synopsis of scary movies sometimes but i don't like watching them, my brain is too visual and repetitive and scenes get stuck in my head and it's not fun

9. any talents?

lots of general art things, like i can draw some and sew things and do leatherwork etc etc.

10. where were you born?

in the northeast United States but i moved away long ago

11. what are your hobbies

playing video games, listening to kpop, watching Asian media, LARPing, making things primarily for LARP stuff

12. do you have any pets?

an elderly gentleman bastard cat, Xanatos, and a trash gremlin cattle dog known commonly as Poops

13. how tall are you?

taller than my sisters and my mother but shorter than my father

14. favorite subject in school?

well i have a bachelor's degree in literature with a minor in history so those

15. dream job

theoretically i was doing that for a while where i was working for myself making things (sewing, doing applique, dyeing fabric, doing some leatherwork, etc) on commission, but i struggle with self and time management, plus my income was incredibly inconsistent and variable so my bills just weren't getting paid. so really i guess a dream version of that would be one where i was getting paid better and had the ability to stay on task 🤣🤣

thanks for tagging me, @callipigio 💖 i think most people i would tag already have been so if you see this and wanna do it and you haven't been, pretend i tagged you and do it anyway 🌟

[just4studying]

19.08.2023

Although it has been a very busy time, today is finally my day off. It's already 6pm, and I haven't accomplished much yet. I'm feeling a bit of remorse, but both my body andmind needed this break - just lying in bed, watching youtube, and relaxing. I did manage to do some laundry, and once the sun sets, I plan to head to the market for groceries.

As I mentioned a couple of days ago, I'll now share what I've been up to and why I'm feeling so tired and sluggish.

*****

Let's start with Wednesday. I visited my bosses' house in the countryside. I say bosses because they are married couple (they are music artists also). A few years back, they purchased a property that was in complete ruins. It wasn't just one house; it comprised three buildings, all of which used to be a village school. They embarked on the task of renovating them. Currently, one of the buildings is almost complete, and that's where they reside. They decided to restore the other two buildings as well. The plan is to create workshop spaces for others and even host concerts and dance parties. They are quite passionate about ethnic/folk/world music, making the village a perfect location for such endeavors.

During my time there, I helped with the renovation of the other two buildings. On the first day, I was vacuuming the building that used to be the main part of the old school – the workers are soon going to lay the floor there. On Thursday, we undertook the task of clearing out the middle building (where the workshops will be held eventually). My boss had arranged for a large container, and we got rid of old, useless windows, doors, and other similar items.

By the time I returned home on Thursday evening,, I was utterly exhausted. However, on the following day (Friday), we had a concert at our club. It attracted a large crowd, and I was there since 1pm as I had to take care of the beer orders. I got back home late, quickly showered, and crashed into bed.

I'm really relieved to have the next three days off.

[tekni-kali]

Day 27

05:30p, Thursday, May 25, 2023

07:45p - I was writing in the journal, then decided I'd rather spend the writing time making the post today. Maybe it's reasonable that in the span of time it took to pick up the keyboard with my left hand, transfer it to my right hand, place it down on the table, open edge, click the bookmark, find the drafted post, check the time, and begin typing....I happened to forget whatever it was I wanted to write about that facilitated switching from the paper journal to the Tumblr Post in the first place....

*sigh*

It is 11 minutes until the orange bois get fed....Both are sitting, staring, conveying clear as crystalline their most immediate desire....to have the next refill of crunchies in the bowl. :sigh:

I will have to factor in Cat Food. Zulian is at the bedroom door but he turned around and meandered back over to sit by the door and clean his feet...Nugget knocked over the blue chair...

Oki...the music is selected and I keep gettin' heckin' sidetracked to dance along to it....currently em listening to:

lovely piano and horn and drums and togetherness.

OH!!

ohohohohoho I remember the thing I wanted to write!! Lookit me...gettin' around to the point this many words in..uhm, still not time to feed the cats though. That's 5 minutes...so maybe I type for 04 minutes, feed the boys then figure out what I feel like doing next...something I know, something new?

OPTIONS FOR THIS EVENINGS LEISURE ACTIVITY!

Debate whether enough non-leisure activities have been completed before the time for bed comes. Friday is tomorrow then the no work time! Tomorrow i have 4 minimum self-assigned tasks to focus on. After they are completed, some random ideas for next steps: a. Review Slack for answered questions, organize, attach to articles as solutions to questions after publishing, queue article content update section.

It is time to feed the orange bois!

-08:00p

08:01 - I wanted to pick a color to associate with the time, day, date, log regulation ID. But then...I didn't want to pick one yet. So I thought Black/White (default depending on appearance theme field setting) is sufficient for when I haven't decided, or don't feel like deciding, or simply may feel like I'd rather not associate a color with it yet.

(yay preposition!)

Newai....I really like what I'm listening to!

We've made it to:

So the other day I posted a question in the Write the Docs Slack, and now I've been given the opportunity to read articles about image description composition...there are three four articles. I would like to read them.

Problem is I also have WOF to read, and the clock on that one is ticking...

The holds for the octopus book and a third one I forgot what it was are ready to be checked out as well....so what's that? Three (3) books & two (4) articles.l So yeah....I'll go fiddle with that and come back here when I'm ready :) Hopefully before midnight! Maybe I'll be ready to pick a color by then?

-08:13p

09:34p -

I didn't read any of the things yet, but I have a plan for how I think I want to go about tackling things. Also...I've decided today was a yellow day. I'm going to bed early, to wake up early, to get through Friday and on with the holiday weekend.

I have the capacity to be a good girl.

Catch ya later!

-09:35p

P.S. If you didn't catch it in the pinned post, I have colors associated with how I feel my day went...I think I want to use them to try and track my mood for either the day or for how I feel at the time I start the post...maybe both?...either way, seems like it could be a reasonable way to feed two birds with one french fry

Here's the Legend:

[deepwoundsandfadedscars]

Me chanting to myself: "one more day. Just one more day, you can do it"

[stanon-delaforet]

March productivity challenge, first week (1st-6th)

(A few of the questions are shortened, since I was writing these in my bullet journal)

01. Tuesday

Boxing practice cancelled

What are your goals for this month? What's something you're looking forward to?

I'm very excited for my birthday on the 31st, however, before that I'm also having the one year anniversary of surviving my suicide attempt on the 28th. I'm planning to celebrate a little by myself and reflect on this past year

It's bright and sunny outside, so I took my dog for a walk. Later I meditated with my revival plant.

02. Wednesday

Therapy

Boxing practice

Do you consider yourself a workaholic? What times do you feel most productive?

I have quite the opposite problem, since in true ADHD fashion, I procrastinate until the last minute, while feeling guilty about not doing anything, then I hastily slap together the bare minimum. I feel the most productive when I'm hyperfixated on a task

I bought a set of those watercolor brushes that hold water inside of them. Can't wait to get the chance to try them out!

03. Thursday

Shopping with Soph

Visiting Mel

Afternoon maths cancelled

If you could make your own dream garden, how would you plan it out?

It would be closed off, surrounded by hedges and trees that bloom in the spring. A sunny lawn made up of native wild grass species where I can play with my dog. Patches of herbs, growing in bushes around. A shady part, under a huge willow, where the ground is covered in moss and there's a Japanese garden style sitting area.

While thrifting with Soph, I found a really cool green trenchcoat that'll be perfect once the weather is warmer. I also got some fun stickers to decorate my sketchbook with.

04. Friday

Boxing practice

What's your usual café order? Is it always the same or do you try new things?

I almost always have to get decaf because of my medication, so if I drink coffee, it's for the taste. I love seasonal drinks and I'll also try the local stuff whenever I go to a new place. If nothing interests me, then I'll usually default to tea.

I almost forgot to go to boxing practice today.

05. Saturday

Study for the upcoming biology test

Robot exhibit at the mall with family

What are your favourite shows? Is there anything specific you like about them?

I love action and animation so of course I'm a huge sucker for anime. My favorites are Fullmetal Alchemist Brotherhood, Bungou Stray Dogs and Avatar. Other animated shows I like are Arcane, The Owl House and The Dragon Prince.

The exhibit was a little lackluster, but me and mom decided to come back for a pre-birthday shopping trip next week :)

06. Sunday

Clean my room

Clean the bathroom

Do laundry

Do you have a favorite movie or do you like them by genre?

I'm not big on movies, since my attention span is more suited to focus on and enjoy shows more, but the ones I do like are, once again, action and animation. My favorite is definitely Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse.

[theweeklybusy]

The week in review

Monday the 27th my aunt and uncle were still here, so it was kind of a work day and kind of a host day. Luckily I was working from home and a handful of higher-ups were out at conferences or on vacation, so few people noticed that I was slow in answering my emails.

I realized that night that the pattern I had been fiddling with started with the wrong measurements. So I painfully unraveled it all back to the foundation row, re-balled the yarn barf, and sadly started over. At this point, if I run into another mistake, I may just have to roll with it because I do not want to un-do this project a second time!

Tuesday 28th was Tiabeanie's final class of level 3 obedience training. We've had her for about 9 months now, and she has really blossomed from the dog that the shelter knew, that the fosters knew, and that we knew when we first got her. She is sweet and smart and sassy, loving and cuddly, and also unfortunately still pretty anxious about being away from me. Having training together has really helped our bond and trust for me to be able to move into things like cutting her nails and giving her baths with less fear and fuss (she still doesn't like them though) and I just know that the next big hurdle will be addressing her separation anxiety.

For now though, I love the training place and am excited to move onto the more fun stuff!

Wednesday the 29 was a full and flexible day! Started with a 2 mile walk around the lake with a friend who is babysitting a greyhound! I wish we had a properly fenced place for her to run because I would love to see her dash about and play with Tiabeanie, but most dog parks don't have the 10 foot high fences recommended for speedsters and leapers like sighthounds. Then home for laundry and chores and after the fur babies had lunch Andrew and I set out to check out the county fair...only to learn at the entrance that no pets were allowed. So with Tiabeanie in the back seat we pivoted to Main Street and just people watched while eating pizza.

When we got home from lunch the power was out (father-in-law is working on the wiring as he preps for re-insulating our attic) so I busied myself with a project that didn't need power - a carding board. Not to be confused with cardboard, this style of fiber prep was the predecessor to todays blending board. I nailed a patch of carding cloth to the underside of my fiber picker to have a more all-in-one multi-use tool, then wrapped some carding cloth around a pair of handles I had connected at the ends for a (very ugly) type of comb to pull over the board. Then I finished carding some of the llama fluff I had washed and picked and now it's ready for spinning. I'm really glad to be done with this project as it is a tool that can help me move forward with so many other projects!

Thursday the 30th was apparently uneventful enough that I took no pictures or really noted what I did during the day. Mostly just remoted in to work and caught up on emails while folks were away.

Friday July 1st however was a big deal. For starters, I forgot it was Friday and missed my therapy call! I had stuff to talk about too so I'll have to make some notes to remember it through to the next appointment. I also was able to log off early from work and pack up some clothes, crafts, and my rig to head over to a friends house for a holiday weekend LAN party!

My rig is much older than everyone else's and programmed for much different tasks. While folks set up their PCs and gaming laptops, I took a select corner of the folding tables in the living room to set up a restored Singer featherweight. Through the whole weekend I listened to people game while sewing a yukata, spinning yarn, and making progress on two crochet projects. I spent two nights at the LAN before burning out hard on all the noise, shuffling around, and children, so I packed up Sunday afternoon, collapsed on the spare bed at home for a nap, then stress ate 2/3 of a pack of Oreos for dinner. Not the best way to end the weekend, but all in all it was pretty fun and it was nice to see so many people and also make a lot of progress on my projects.

[r-ene]

09.22.21

- day 27/100 days of productivity

today's a mess: forgot I have cardio quiz tomorrow (later as it's currently 3am as I am posting this), several of our cats are in a bad shape - feline parvovirus or poisoning is what we suspect, but I'm not keen on assuming they've been poisoned... so, yeah. and I woke up at 10am instead of 5am since our class was still at 1pm and it took me 3 times of asking mama for reassurance that rest time is not wasted time for me to feel better about having a long rest last night.

here's today's accomplishments:

completed notes on 2 lectures for Fundamentals

1/3 on RTCC infograph due Thursday

1/3 through Microbio long quiz due Friday (still answering through xodo so I wouldn't clumsily spill anything on the answer sheet or wrinkle it)

2/3 through Cardiorespi notes for later's quiz (once I get done with this, this will also serve as a reviewer for exams next week and the long quiz this week)

2/2 done with Biochem notes

I'll repeat this: rest time is not wasted time.

got the energy to do a lot of stuff !!! And after later's classes, I might take a long rest again, having done an all nighter. Of course though, I'll make sure to do a lot of things after resting so I could just easily study next week instead of having to write down notes the night before of the exam day and get a peace of mind that I've passed everything (tasks, long quizzes).

Well, going back to studying and hopefully I could squeeze in a bit of nap since there's nothing to study for first subject, I could relax an hour or so before class starts.

Good luck with everything and make sure to get as much rest as you can, whenever you can !! 🤍

Instagram

[jocy-diaries]

04.08.2022

I think I just don't like writing my diary entries on this phone because this is the phone I do everything else on you know? Big sigh. But anyways~

On Wednesday I made some dinner for my sister and I, Dumplings for her, and I really wanted Okra thanks to the lovely Imamuroom so I decided to get so frozen Okra and make a really simple stir fry. I wasn't expecting it to be good because it was frozen Okra instead of fresh and the last time mom made it it was...bad. it wasn't good. So I was expecting the same thing. And honestly I don't know what mom did but when I made it it was *delicious*. Cannot wait to finish that little meal.

On Thursday I ended work early because honestly. I had been working until 7pm the entire week and waking up early and I'm TIRED OF IT. So I ended early and chilled with my sister~ Then we went to watch Sonic 2!! I had a Tito Mule drink which was the first mixed drink I've had since forever. God I miss mixed drinks but I don't know how to make them myself. It was delicious. And honestly the movie was so great. A lot of fun, and everyone was excited for the third movie they previewed. It looks great. I hope we get to see Amy, I'm so excited for her. Also, I hope they get to keep Jim Carey because he's honestly great as Dr. Eggman.

Now today is finally Friday. I'm so tired. I've been waking up exhausted eventhough I sleep more than eight hours now than to the Melatonin gummies. And my focus is still shot so I might need to get something for adhd again. But honestly, I've been remembering stuff and daily admin tasks pretty well! I'm proud of myself for that. I got my dog's appointments set up as well as my sister's appointments. Plus I'm getting things continued for the Italy trip and SJSU, although now I might consider doing my mlis abroad in 2023. It seems...better? Maybe.

Also it's been super rainy and foggy all week, and just yesterday things started looking sunny again~ I can say that I love Spring because of how it reminds me of the beach in Africa. Sunny with a light wind and the trees swaying~ I love that sound. I also love the sound of rain on a tin or metal roof because of grandma's house~

Now I'm looking forward to my DnD sessions tonight and tomorrow (and Sunday ig) and in Sunday I'll be driving with my sister to Helen GA and then a little farmers shop~ Very excited for that. We'll have to leave kinda early so I'm hoping we also get to stop by the library meeting place for coffee and breakfast.

My mother wants me to save more money and be more conscious of it and like, I agree, but at the same time it's like. You expect me to be alive alive a while, don't you? I can't think of a good reason to not spend money when I want to on the things I want because I could be dead tomorrow, you know? I think I need to invest in rental properties or air bnbs or something just so I can put THAT money in savings and spend the rest of my money however I want.

So DnD tonight~ And ohmygosh. NEBATI GOT CLOAK OF WINGS!!!! That (and brooch if shielding) was honestly the last thing I wanted her to get to complete her look!! I'm so glad she found one. Now she has white wings to act like an angel for her goddess~ Unfortunately...she failed every saving throw after that :,) But she got to train fight with her friends which she really enjoyed (eventhough she got taken out Round two lol) Also volunteered at the library and it went well~ A patron brought in a jar of flowers which was just GORGEOUS And I got some books and Barbie movies for next weekend since the library is closed. Gotta figure out something to do for Easter...

And...my gosh. Yall. I got asked to be in a one shot!! Someone said they WANT to DM for me! I'm not used to being someone who people want to be around or talk to, so this is. Such a pleasant shock. I'm really grateful I stayed in this campaign~ Plus the DM for the Saturday group said that I fit in well with the group so I'm just. I'm getting so many good points. Now I really think I'll get a subscription to dnd beyond and read through all of the books. Especially since people want to play with me! :D I'm gonna add them all as friends on Discord after all!! I was scared of doing that but now I will >:3c

[the-cemetery-researcher]

Progress update 25/01/2022

Today I started writing this update in the middle of my data entry session, because I needed to rant.

I found a grave which got added to the study during my fieldwork in January that I have no photos of because a member of the public kept talking to me and so I was distracted!! So fucking annoyed at myself. It's this one, which by coincidence in the corner of a photo I took of vandalism damage to Karl Marx's grave in 2019. Just an ordinary cross, for a pretty ordinary family. I feel so bad for them.

Luckily a quick search on ancestry (I had the inscription written down) has led me to a find a grave page for them and that means I can at least use a placeholder image until I can take one. Then I couldn't resist going down another small rabbithole to find out a bit about them, to somehow make it up to them for being so neglectful. William Durnford was a solicitor. His wife Mary is buried with him and they had three daughters - Miney, Mildred and Winifred, and sons called Herbert and Ernest butHerbert died in childhood. When William Durnford died in 1917 he seems to have left his effects (£2574 3s) to Mildred even though Mary outlived him, I wonder if Mary was ill? In 1911 Jemima Veals (Mary's mother) was living with them and was 92! Making the people I study human made me feel a bit better. I always say every stone tells a story and that is so true!

I also had a really good chat with my Friend Jo about what I'm doing. It's nice to have a fellow cemetery friend cheer you on. That brightened up my afternoon and the support is so invaluable.

Finishing this update late at night again. I really did think I'd get through the rest of the graves today, but I forgot that the last 3 sets involve a lot of new data again. I've got all the easy ones and about half of the difficult ones done today - I've got 2 plans to draw (one is very complicated) and 8 graves worth of data to finish. I got 3 plans and 19 graves done today and 28 graves and 4 plans done yesterday. So even though I know rationally that the stuff I did today was harder, I still feel like I should stay up past midnight to carry on...

I think part of the problem is that I'm busy all day tomorrow with other stuff - mostly being a school governor- so I now know it will be at least Thursday before I finish this and Friday before I tackle the rest of the tasks I put on Monday's to do list... Dyspraxia makes it hard to be realistic about how long things will actually take so unless I actually stop and put a time next to everything I tend to overcommit, but I still feel like I'm going so slowly!

I'm going to attempt to be realistic here about the data I have left to do: HGE13.1 - HGE13.6 Plan - 1.5 hours Grave data - 5 hours (I haven't typed up the inscriptions yet) HGE14.1 - HGE14.2 Plan - 3 hours (2 massive and complicated mausoleums - did I mention that my grave plans are drawn in Paint? Yeah, I'm that professional baby! One px = 1cm) Grave data - (fewer inscriptions) 1.5 hours So 11 hours work. I reckon I can do that on Thursday - maybe- I do have a governors meeting on Teams too... Either way it looks like I'll get to the reading/writing stuff on Friday, so I need to post a remote retreat on Twitter so people can join me for part/all the day.

Another part of the problem is that even though Ash keeps reassuring me that I'm not being mean, I still feel like I'm brushing him off a lot and neglecting him. He's been in bed for 3 hours now and will be out of the house before I'm awake tomorrow and yet when he's around I struggle to spare him 30 mins because my brain keeps saying 'but you could be working' and that makes me feel guilty. I also feel guilty if he sees me waste time on twitter or replying to a text or something because that just stretches out the time til I'm done with this shit and can be a good partner again.

I told him I feel like a goblin, and I really do. I did actually shower and get dressed, cook (put things in oven) and do the washing up (twice) today but I still feel gross somehow. And grumpy. I'm always a very emotional person, quick to cry at everything (today it was the Vimes Boots Index) and pretty quick to anger, but this whole process just makes me feel like I'm living on my last, exposed and frayed nerve, all the time. I feel like an ugly hunched up malevolence in the corner of the living room, just giving off bad vibes from my desk all day. I think we need to bring back hermitages so I can be in what currently is clearly my natural environment of a dank cave or hut in the middle of a lake and be away from everyone until this thesis either gets handed in or kills me.

[frogsandfries]

I'm not entirely convinced that it isn't Sunday XD

So I went down to the store to get my pastries, entirely convinced today was Sunday. Obviously my order wasn't ready. And of course, I just recently stopped working with these people, so I got plenty of teasing--and one over-the-top reaction from someone who I wasn't going to miss before she suggested I'm a day ahead because I've been spending my time getting fucked up. No, dumbass, I haven't spent the last couple days entirely fucked up. For your information, I spent Thursday embroidering and Friday organizing my clothes. It's more that I've been so involved in my tasks, than that I'm just wasted.

Of course, in the first place, this lady largely annoys me, but it's also kind of annoying to feel like it's being suggested on some level that I'm a fatass because I live with a perpetual case of the munchies. Not everyone spends their free time parked in front of a computer or TV screen bored or wishing for some kind of altered state of consciousness. I'm a fatass because it's hard to go for a walk when you're trying to stitch a straight line or make sure your blanket-stitch flowers have clean, crisp lines (a couple of my flowers on my Rose Quartz patch came out weird because I was having a conversation).

Anyway, in addition to being confused about today failing to be Sunday, I'm also this close to being finished packing. Which is fine, the packing thing is no worry to me, it just means I'm probably going to have all day tomorrow, as well as Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday, to work on some embroidery. A lot of embroidery. Lots and loootttttttttsssss of embroidery.

I just have a bunch of like, medication and lotion and soap and stuff to pack, which I would like to organize into zip bags, of course.

Another thing that irritates me is that I messaged my sister to be like, hey my friend left without saying goodbye and it upset me--we haven't talked about the way I relate to him since the twenty-second of January...... Her immediate response is, you're obsessed, get over it. To which I'm just like, you don't even read; if she did read, she might've noticed my statement that I might wake up tomorrow and just be done with our friendship. Her excuse was, she was tired........ ~.~

So since today is Saturday, I'm just going out for sushi, and then tomorrow, I'll get those locks from Walmart, and some other things. The pizza I bought because I was certain tomorrow was Monday, I'm going to wrap up when I get back to the house, and try to hide it in the fridge.

Or maybe I should just do all my errands today. Then tomorrow I can just run out for my pastries and go back to the house and just focus on my embroidery.

[scorevechkin]

I couldn't think of anything interesting to share anonymously so I'll just tell you about how my day is going. It's my one work from the office day so I had to get up early, commute and wear real people clothes instead of sweats which is lame but I feel cute in my outfit and splurged and got myself some starbucks to make up for the early commute (I even got a snack, not just my usual tea) so thats nice. And as much as being alone in the office is kinda weird I have a simple to do list, it's a mindless busy-work day which is I enjoy. Even better one of todays tasks is un-fucking a bunch of other peoples errors, which I did not realize was happening so much so now I get to send a mass email telling everyone to stop being dumb. It prolly says something about me that i'm a petty bitch that getting to send a company wide callout email brings me joy. Anyways, hope your thursday is going well:)

I am so jealous you get to send out that sort of email. My Thursday is definitely going, lmao. I’m glad you got to treat yourself to some starbies and you got to look cute!

Hope the rest of your week goes amazing (tomorrow is Friday, fuck yeah).