#soo cool to see how these comics were first presented back then

[daydreamerdrew]

the announcement of the beginning of the “Tad of the Tanbark” and “Don Dixon and the Hidden Empire” comic strips for the Sunday edition of the Brooklyn Eagle

[stillebesat]

The Sweater

Cartoon Therapy: Emile Sanders Shorts: Remy (Sleep)  Sanders Sides: Janus  Blurb: Emile had said he was making a sweater for a friend. Only he neglected to tell Remy that this friend wasn’t exactly...well...human. Fic Type: General, NotQuiteHuman!AU, Kid!Janus Overall Fic Warnings: Extra Limbs, Implied Child Abandonment Taglist in Reblog 

“You didn’t have to come.”

Remy flinched at the unexpected rumble from the towering man walking next to him. After three days spent with Emile, he was sure that he would have such a reaction under control sooner rather than later...so long as the dude stopped speaking up out of the blue like this that is. 

Emile licked his lips, adjusting his glasses as he held the tissue wrapped package closer to his chest. “Really.” 

Remy took a sip from his Starbucks cup, savoring the warmth of the hot chocolate in the chill evening air, glad that the snow had stopped falling for a glacier minute. “Gurl.” He looked up over the rims of his sunglasses and smirked, again trying to not take it to heart that this guy was a good hulking foot taller than him. “I soo did. With all the blood, sweat, and tears I put into helping you--you owe me this at least.”

It wasn’t everyday that he walked into the room reserved for teaching beginners how to be dressmakers in search of an extra spool of green thread to find this unexpectedly gentle giant awkwardly hunched over the sewing machine attempting to make….something.

He’d heard the term bull in a china shop before, but Remy had never felt the term applicable to anyone until he saw Emile. He’d been sure one wrong twitch of his dinner plate sized hands would mean bye bye sewing machine. 

Of course, after getting the big guy to spill the beans and admit that he’d been trying to make a sweater for a ‘friend’ by threatening to kick him out of the sewing lab for being there outside hours; Remy had learned that just like the Mythbusters had proven, despite Emile’s wrestling sized figure, he was just as delicate as the bull in the episode had been. His large fingers were far more dexterous -if prone to being pricked by needles- than Remy had expected of the guy who could probably crush a watermelon with his bare hands. 

But that didn’t mean he’d leave this amateur to his own devices. No Ma’am! Not after he’d seen the pitiful first attempt of something that could have been a sweater fit for a large teddy bear or maybe a small child, Remy had delegated himself as Emile’s pseudo teacher if only to ensure no sewing machines ended up crushed into teacups. 

He needn’t have worried though. Emile had a soft touch. 

The big guy bit his lip, keeping his eyes firmly straight ahead in a way that told Remy he didn’t want to make eye contact. 

That was probably wise for him because Remy could pull a mean puppy dog look when he wanted to. He’d received more than his fair share of drinks on the house from it and he could and would use those eyes against Emile if he thought it would help his case.

Emile exhaled, pushing his glasses up his nose. “I just--I don’t know if--if Stitch will like...well...strangers. He’s very shy.” 

Stitch. Like the alien from that kids movie. 

Kids movies that Emile was rather obsessed with once he opened that particular can of gummy worms though Remy was sure he was only beginning to uncover that massive iceberg of an interest. This intimidating mountain of a man had morphed into quite the giant nerdy softie when it came to him talking about his cartoons.  

Maybe that was why the sweater had been comically small. Of course, getting the proper sizing for this gift from Emile had been rather...like pulling teeth. It had taken a full hour of wheedling before Emile had admitted that he was only guessing at the size he needed for this...friend.  

“Sugarbee.” Remy shook his head. “If he likes you I don’t see how little--” and it galled him that he had to call himself little because he was a good five foot eleven inches thank you very much. “Old me would frighten him away.” 

Emile shrugged a shoulder, fingers brushing the string on the package. “He’s just...I don’t want to scare him. I barely have any trust with him as it is and if I bring someone new--” 

Remy rolled his eyes, flexing his fingers around his cooling cup. It was like the guy was talking about a feral dog and not a person. “Trust me, babes. I ain’t gonna scare him.”

The sweater on the other hand?

That was less certain.

Because it had to be the strangest one ever created. 

Like Remy had seen his fair share of Ugly Sweaters over the years.

But this one would probably take the cake if only for the fact that Emile had insisted that said sweater have six arms.

After having to figure out the logistics of that particular snag, and after doing most of the sewing of those extra arms himself, there was no way Remy wasn’t seeing the reaction of this ‘Stitch’ kid to this particular present.

Maybe the dude just liked pretending to be the alien and Emile was humoring him. 

Regardless, Remy wanted to make sure that said monstrosity actually fit. It was a good eighty-two percent of his work after all and he prided himself on his garments fitting perfectly. 

Emile exhaled, still avoiding eye contact. “Just...stay behind me okay?” 

Remy gulped the last of his hot chocolate, tossing the cup into a nearby trash can as he followed Emile around the corner into a tree filled snow covered park. “Three steps back. Got it, Princess.” 

Though seriously, if Stitch wasn’t afraid of Emile, towering giant that he was, he highly doubted his presence would be an issue.

Remy shoved his hands into his pockets, letting the big guy move ahead to cut a swath through the untouched snow like a snowplow on a highway towards a huge pine tree in an out of the way corner that had branches all the way down to the ground, hiding the trunk completely from view. It was an odd spot to meet a ‘friend.’ Especially since said friend had apparently not arrived yet. 

Remy exhaled, hunching his shoulders. “Looks like we’re early.” He commented, glancing around the park, seeing no one else. Which made sense. It was nearly sunset. It was cold. The sky had a dark enough overcast that he was sure it would start snowing again any second. Who in their right mind would be out right now?

“We’re not.” Emile said, glancing over his shoulder. “Remember. Stay back.” He again cautioned before he knelt, letting out a soft three pitch whistle. “Stitch?” He called softly. “Hey buddy, it’s me, Emile. I--I brought you something.” 

Remy frowned, staring at the silent tree. “Did you actually have me help you make a sweater for a mutant squirrel?” That or Emile had a screw loose and he’d just spent three days making a monstrosity of a sweater for an imaginary friend. “Shh!” Emile hissed before again whistling at the tree. “Stitch? It’s okay. This is Remy. He’s a…”

Remy raised an eyebrow as Emile bit his lip, glancing back at him. 

“He’s a friend, he won’t hurt you.” The big guy edged another foot closer, hand brushing the tips of the pine needles sending snow showering down off the branches. “Please come out? I--we brought you something.” 

The pine tree remained silent.

Remy shoved his hands deeper in his pockets, regretting more that he’d drunk all his hot chocolate. “Maybe he’s not home.” Everyone who was anyone in their right mind would be anywhere but outside in this weather.

“Maybe you’re scaring him.” Emile snapped back before wincing. “Ah...could you like...kneel down? Please.” 

Remy scoffed. Him? Scaring the imaginary friend? If Emile wasn’t scary then Remy definitely wasn’t scary either. “And freeze to death?” He asked, awkwardly crouching on his heels. His designer shoes were already feeling the damp chill of the snow working its way in to soak his socks, there was no way he would allow his knees to experience the same torment. 

“Stitch?” Emile pleaded, again whistling as he edged closer. “Stitch.” 

They were gonna be out here until midnight at this point. “Come on, Stitcharoo.” He said ignoring the big guy’s frantic hissing to shut up. “I’m friendly. Emile is friendly. We’re all friendily freezing here so how about you come out an--” Remy cut off as the branches rustled. 

A single yellow eye peered out at them, glinting in the fading sunlight. 

Okay. Imaginary friend out. Mutant feral squirrel back in.

“Meal?” A shaky voice asked. A young shaky voice.

Ooohhh Goodie. Remy pressed his lips together, fighting the way his heart had jumped into his throat. Freaking talking mutant feral squirrel. It had better be a mutant squirrel because if there was a freaking child living in this tree in the middle of a freaking snow storm--

Emile visibly sagged with relief. “Hey Stitch, buddy. You okay?” 

The eye gave a slow blink. “C-c-cold.” 

“Aren’t we all.” Remy muttered, glad that his sunglasses protected him from whatever baleful glare the creature was casting on him now. He gave a two fingered wave. “I’m freezing too, buckaroo.” 

“Remy.”

“What?” 

Emile gave him the patented Will you shut up look that would have made any mother proud. 

Remy made a face. “You never said I couldn’t talk.” He was still behind him wasn’t he? He was crouching in the freaking snow freezing his toes off. He should be allowed to talk to the glowing eye that had better not be a child living in the tree in the middle of winter! 

Emile exhaled, before pulling off the string on the present, unwrapping the black and yellow sweater. “Remy and I made you this, Stitch. To help with the cold.” He said, holding it out in all its six-armed glory. 

A soft gasp came from the tree as the yellow eye opened wide. “Me?” 

“Yah, kiddo.” Emile said, nodding. “Can I help you put it on?”

The branches shifted, the yellow eye glancing to Remy before vanishing. 

Sugarbee hadn’t been kidding when he said his friend was shy. 

“C-cold.” The voice whispered from somewhere within the tree. “Meal. Safe?” 

Remy fought the urge to pinch the bridge of his nose, anger burning in his chest. They’d be out here all night at this rate. “Yah, honeysuckle, you’re safe. Let Emile put the sweater on you okay? I’ll stay right here.” There was no one else in the park. Who would leave a child out here alone! One that had apparently been out here for a while if previous conversations with Emile were anything to go by. 

The branches didn’t move.

Perfect.

“Stitch.” Emile whispered, slowly lowering the sweater, stretching out a hand to the branches. “Please? You’re cold, let me help you this time.”

Remy frowned again, poking Emile in the back. “This time?”

Emile flinched. “He--ah...he hasn’t actually let me...touch him? Before. This is the closest I’ve gotten.” 

Oh for the love of! Remy shot to his feet. “Gurl!” 

The big guy was there, a plate sized hand on his chest holding him back and radiating heat like the sun, before he could take a step. “I said he was shy.” Emile said, eyes wide and pleading. “Don’t. Scare. Him.”

Ah huh. And in the process of not scaring him they were just going to have this mysterious friend freeze to death because there would be no way a simple sweater would help the kid survive the night! Remy growled trying to move around Emile, but it was like trying to move around a mountain. “The sound of that voice tells me that’s a child, Sugarbee. A FREAKING CHILD and you’re just letting him stay here.”

“He doesn’t trust humans!” 

That pulled him up short. “Humans.” Remy repeated, lowering his sunglasses. “HUMANS? Is he not human, Emile?” If this was an actual real life Stitch then--then!! 

Emile had the grace to look embarrassed. “I--I---uhh--” 

Remy threw up his hands. He would burn that particular bridge when he got there, But right now, he needed to see this ‘not human’ child and make sure he was safe. Remy ducked under Emile’s arm, scooping up the sweater in the process. “Hey Stitcharoo.” He said crouching at the base of the tree branches, ignoring the frantic warnings hissing like a teapot behind him as he pulled off his sunglasses, hanging them from the collar of his jacket. “It’s gonna snow again, tonight. You know. Get colder? Freeze. And my buddy here is like this giant heating blanket and wants to keep you warm. You’ll like the warm. I promise it’s--”

He froze as a child’s pale hand, nearly tinged blue, popped out of the tree, visibly shaking as it poked his cheek before jerking back out of sight. 

“It’s--it’s--I uhh Hi?” Remy stuttered out, brain trying to process what had just happened as he rubbed the spot the child had touched. 

Surely. Surely, he hadn’t seen what he thought he’d seen. There hadn’t been glittering scales on that hand. No. No trick of the light. Maybe it was cosmetic? Part of a costume?

The branches rustled before two hands, two scaled covered left hands, parted them, revealing a child’s face half covered in scales, peering back at him. “Hi.” The kid said, eyes -one golden, one a regular brown- shifting to Emile as he knelt down next to Remy before focusing on Remy himself. “Safe?”

“I--” Remy blinked before nodding dumbly as a third hand, a right hand with no scales on the pale skin this time, reached out to Emile’s ginormous hand. 

Suddenly Emile’s insistence that there needed to be six arms made a lot more sense. If Remy had already seen three hands, surely that could mean that there were three more still hidden out of sight. 

“You’re safe.” Emile said, gently taking the boy’s hand and squeezing it. 

The boy bit his lip before he surged forward straight into Emile’s chest. “Wa-warm.” He whispered, multiple hands gripping onto his coat as snow from the branches above showered down on top of them.

Remy tsked, quickly shaking off the white powder, heart pounding like a drum as he took in the ragged state of the kid’s clothes, the so called ‘sweater’ he currently wore was barely worth the name, only having two proper arms and four more holes in the sides for the--for the, Gee Manetti, the kid actually had six arms!!!! as Emile pulled open his tent of a jacket to wrap around the boy. 

“I got you. I got you.” Emile soothed as he scooped Stitch--Remy really hoped that wasn’t his actual name--into his lap, getting his bare feet out of the snow. 

The boy visibly shivered, tucking his toes -normal human toes beyond the left set being more scaled- into the crease between Emile’s shirt and pants. 

Remy bit back a growl. No shoes. Barely any clothes. Some welcome to Earth this kid got. Just because he had six freaking arms didn’t mean that the boy deserved to be abandoned! Even Superman had had a willing farm couple to look after him! 

“I hope you know he is not staying here.” Remy softly scolded, moving cautiously closer. Despite his misgivings about exposing the boy to the weather, he pulled Emile’s coat away so he could get his divine gift of a sweater onto the kid, a difficult feat as Stitch had practically glued himself against Emile’s side. 

The boy made a sound of protest, but didn’t fight him, eyes barely open as he watched Remy finagle the sweater over the rags he currently wore. 

It was pathetic. The boy was practically skin and bones! Remy could feel each individual rib as he tugged the fabric over him for crying out loud! Not to mention the arms themselves were practically sticks! This kid had been neglected for some time. It was--it was---Remy did growl. No one should have to live like this! 

“If you aren’t taking him home with you, by golly I will bring him to my place.” He said, pulling each sleeve over the boy’s ice cold hands. “Crofters! Emile, he needs another three sweaters, new pants, socks, SHOES, mittens--no no gloves. Probably gloves. This isn’t RIGHT!” The boy was COLD. His scales were like ice. How he wasn’t dead yet from hypothermia or frostbite was a mystery but No Ma’am was the kid gonna spend another night out here. “He needs soup, hot chocolate, a warm water bottle, a heated blanket a--”

“I know.” 

Remy jerked his head up at Emile’s quiet words. “Well. Good.” He pulled off his coat so he could slip his own sweater over his head and use it to create some temporary pants for the kid, until he could find something better. At least the boy had two normal legs so he could stuff one into each sleeve. 

“Do--” Emile cleared his throat, keeping his eyes firmly on Stitch’s hair. “Do you...have a place for him?”

Remy blinked as he slipped his own coat back on. “Do I---of course I do--do you not?!” What had he been planning to do once he got the boy to trust him? Leave him here?

Emile flushed, ducking his head.

Okay. Okay. He took a calming breath as the boy dropped two of his hands down to grab one of Remy’s in a tight grip, golden eye practically glowing as it flickered between him and Emile. “Rephrase. Do you have a place to stay yourself, Em?” 

“Not one safe for him.” Came the soft response. “I...it’s barely safe for me.” 

Barely safe for a guy who could feasibly dead lift a car? Punch a hole in concrete? He’d have to unpack the meaning of that particular admission some other time. Right after he had time to process that this kid had six freaking arms and was either an actual alien or escaped mutant experiment of some sort. 

“Right.” Remy exhaled, running his free hand through his hair. “Right. First. We get you both back to my place. Second. Get him warm and fed.” Maybe to a doctor--did he even know any doctors who could handle this?! “Third. Figure out living arrangements. Capiche?” Oh and Fourth. Figure out the boy’s actual name or give him a cooler one because no way would he be continuing to call him Stitch. 

That was a simple enough list right? Just four things. Nothing complicated about that. 

Emile blinked, adjusting his glasses. “But you don’t know me.”

Remy scoffed, squeezing the boy’s hands. Sure three days haraunanging the guy on how to properly thread a bobbin wasn’t a normal way to invite someone to be your roommate, but it wasn’t the worst way either. “I don’t know the kid either, Em. But I do know that he needs a home and if you need one too then you’ve got one with me.” The dude had a good heart. He’d been attempting to make a sweater instead of buying one and poking holes in it for crying out loud. 

“I--uh--” Emile cleared his throat. “Thanks.” 

“Don’t mention it.” At least not until he got them all out of the cold. Then they could talk.

The kid shivered again, tightening his grip on their hands. “Safe?” He whispered, resting his head against Emile’s chest, eyes flickering between them both. 

Safe? There was no question about it. Not with another snowstorm coming. Not when Remy desperately itched to pull out all his extra fabric from his sewing closet to throw onto the kid just to give him a proper, better fitting outfit. “Of course, honeysuckle.” He said, pulling the tent of a coat that Emile wore back over the boy to protect him from the cold. “We’ll keep you safe.” He looked up, meeting Emile’s eyes, smirking as he found acceptance there. “We promise.”

[streets-in-paradise]

Let’s talk about the amazingly on spot social commentary on The Boys

Warning: This post contains spoilers from Season 1 and the first three episodes of season 2 of The Boys 

Tags: @nehoymenyoy asked to be tagged. I don’t know if my tags are working well but if they don’t i will send you the link of the post. 

I decided to make this post because i finished all the avaliable episodes of the series two days ago and, having a long talk with my sister about this topic, i tought this is too awesome to not discuss it here. We are both studying in careers of the social field, i'm in sociology and she is in social work. We watched the show together and talking with her inspired my own ideas i would like to share here.

This show was a wonderfull surprise in terms of social commentary. I haven't watched one with such a great commentary since American Gods. In that case i was expecting some degree of progressive commentary because i had read the book previously and i was aware the source material had some, the one added for the series is even better and it was great, but it wasn't a shock to find it. For The Boys i haven't read the comics first and , even when i loved the show for lots of reasons, the amazing on spot social commentary was a hell of a surprise. I have been frustrated lately in terms of the messages in entertaiment products because, even when there is a lot of intention for part of the makers to make more progressive points in their stuff, everything becomes bland marketing to me most of the time. I remember that some years ago media used to came out unintentionally with some really cool progressive messages ( like, for example, " a bug's life" and its anti capitalist message). That stuff seemed soo genuine and today i feel that everytime a product targets my demographic in that sense what they deliver it's soo bland and fake that the progressive intention of the message gets lost in the absolutely obvious intention of selling something to me using my ideals as catch. Precisely this is an important point of critic in this show. I didn't expected at all to get a genuine feeling in the social commentary of a superhero show. I'm not saying that this means i think the makers believe in this (after all, it's amazon), what i praise here is how good they did it. In a time when most productions claim to have a social commentary behind to come out as cool but result in shallow fake bullshit this series has provided me with something that feels autentic. Like American Gods, what i feel the show is trying to tell me actually gets me.

Before starting with the proper talk i want to dedicate a few línes to recommend a few scenes of the show i just mentioned. I was super dissapointed after finding out they will probably end up turning it into more bland fake bullshit for season 3 but, to anyone who likes well delivered social commentary, check on Orlando Jones's scenes as Anansi. He is my favourite character from the show and all his scenes are a blessing. 

I would also want to clarify that this post and the opinions displayed on it are from an anti capitalist, intersectional feminist and latin american perspective. I know the show is very american, the issues it discusses are most of the time worlwide but it has particularities of the american context so i will try to talk only of what i feel i know enough to have a word. I'm argentinian and we have our local versions of some of this problems but i will stay in the series territory trying to be as faithfull as i can to the american reality it gets inspiration from. Also, forgive me for any mistakes on my writing and expresions. English is not my native language. 

Superheros are modern mythology. How would this work in real life?

This is the basic premise of the show’s worldbuilding. The great thing is that this concept is not developed in an edgy, pretentious way. It is serious and painfully real because it’s not only a subversion of tropes, it says a lot of what superheros are to us as a modern times myth. In a superficial view, the world of The Boys feels like what the MCU could have become after the Sokovia accords if they would have been efficiently followed on a worldwide scale.

In that particular universe i use as reference, our superheros are noble and morally heroic individuals.State intervention is the factor threatening to corrupt their actions making them follow the interests of the system. The risk there, along with some very shady violations of human rights to powered people, is having superheros tied to something as unstable as political power. You can fear, for example, what a Trump-like president could do if he had power over the Avengers because, again, the heros are not corrupt, their line of command is. Now, if we strip away all the idealization we had putted on this bunch of powered persons and see them as what they truly are at the end of the day, people like everyone else. Why are we supposed to believe they are immune to corruption? If we also consider the phenomenon of strong privatization of security that has been growing worldwide . Wouldn’t they be more like security workers working for a private contractor? Less like heros and more like private military / security officers?  Now, this is what we are talking about. 

What feels so different from this show is that it assumes a surprisingly realistic point of view on a modern fantasy we are very used to consuming and still constructs a new power fantasy that empowers the viewer. I’ m saying this as an MCU fan, I had grown too comfortable with this optimistic fantasy and this twist from it is brilliant. To put some context on what i want to say here i will try to explain myself first on why i think that superhero fiction have this enormous popularity today and it has become such a huge thing in entertainment. Besides of the obvious reason of big companies producing big exciting action blockbusters for the genre, it’s curious to think on how much these stories gathered a lot of progressive audiences. In past decades action blockbusters didn’t felt progressive, today’s superhero blockbusters were embraced by progressive audiences and this was the start of a twist in general for the media. I think that there is a contextual social reason for this, not the only factor but one i feel is considerable. 

Late Stage Capitalism crushed us, we are so used to injustice and the control the system has over us is so big that we have slowly stopped dreaming of changing it ourselves. Instead, the fantasy of a superhuman who has the power we don’t have saving us from oppression feels really comforting. Captain America becoming such a huge icon in the middle of a time where extreme facism is rising again all over the world, for example. I don’t know much about his comic counterpart but, at least from what i see in the movies, Steve’s ideals feel to me like all those aspects from French Revolution’s  Enlightenment that capitalism dropped away once bourgeois defeated their feudal rivals and capitalism got consolidated, the freedom and equality that feudal lower classes fought for. Today, we feel too small to make a difference so we enjoy the fantasy of powerful persons leading the fight for us. Capitalism feels more unstoppable than ever, it is the only thing who seems strong to remain in a terribly chaotic world. The suffering this cruel system brings to this world is overwhelming, we feel only a miracle can save us now. This is what feeds the narrative of the superhero as modern myth and saviour of humanity.

The Boys tosses aside all our hopes and dreams, presenting us with the most realistic escenario. Superheros are not the miracle we are waiting for, they are humans like everyone else. They are not sacred entities existing beyond our societies, they are part of the system and they insert on it as part of the security industries. They can be corrupted and they work in corrupt institutions in benefit of the ruling class like every other security provider in capitalist societies. They become a new face of the security forces in constant tension with police and military because the myth of the superhero provides them with the public trust those other two forces lost. People lost their trust in cops but they trust sups because they are supposed to be this noble individuals mobilized by their personal feelings of injustice trying to make the world a better place … right? Police are the forces of the ruling class but superheros are supposed to be with us, or at least this is what common sense and propaganda claim, having our hopes as a base to work on. 

For someone so used to the typical superhero fantasy this felt like a slap on my face back to reality. It soo accurate , the system tends to capture any revolutionary input and turn it into profit. Even if the sups could had been a revolutionary factor at the beginning, the most likely thing to happen is for them to become a profitable industry. If we add to this what we already know of the actions of police and military in our real world we have a combo for disaster. The realistic twist is so fresh and painfully real, i can totally see this happening in real life if superheros were a thing. 

We have already introduced ourselves in the world of this story, let’s check on the first main character this series introduces to us. Hughie Campbell, a college age guy who works in an electronics store, lives with his dad and has the most boring average life you can imagine. This guy who is too afraid to ask his boss for a pay raise changes overnight when a superhero kills his girlfriend in front of him and the big corporation the asshole works for covers up the whole thing. The “average guy becomes a hero” trope is not new at all, but the use it has here feels fresh because it is not there only to feed the male geek power fantasy. Hughie is not a geeky average guy only so geeky average guys can identify with him in an action series full of geeky references,he is not there to be the nerdy guy from Robot Chicken. Hughie’s characterization makes a point for everyone. The smallest most unimportant person, the one who can't even stand up for themselves in everyday situations, can make a change. Remember Samwise Gamgee fighting Shelob in Lord of the Rings? Hughie killing Translucent gives me that vibe. If we consider the point i already stated about superheroes being there when we feel too small to fight back injustice, this is the exact opposite. This is a fantasy that gives us the power, makes us think in our own strengths. Hughie is standing up for himself for the first time in his life and he inspires us to fight for our rights. 

Pharmaceutical,Security and Entertainment industries and their business system : Superheros as lab rats,elite security forces and celebrities. 

This part of the post is the hardest to write and the most exquisite. There is so much to talk about about this system Vought shaped tying these three billionaire industries together. The first thing i want to mention, as a point to start, is Butcher’s ramble over the teddy bear with a camera inside in his meeting with Hughie. Perfect introduction for the character with a delightful moment of commentary. In our current societies people live in constant fear for hundreds of reasons. Fears over street crime had skyrocketed all over the world even when crime is not growing uniformly in every country and that accelerated the privatization of security, fears of parents over the strangers they leave they kids with when they are not home inspired products like the one mentioned in the series’s moment, fears on the effects of processed foods are an impulse for the diet industry and i could keep naming lots of other examples. Fears, and the emotional response they trigger , are the base of profitable businesses. 

I had been reading some authors that describe this stage of capitalism as an emotional one. Capitalism preached science and rationality during the past century but today its base of support is an emotional one. To excite the sensations of the people as consumers, to eliminate rational criticism, to push anti popular agendas through emotional excitement and mass hysteria. To cite another example that you can consider bounded to the series, Right Realism in Criminology is now almost common sense and there are people who keep asking for harsher punitive systems. This ideology, with the help of media panic, goes straight after their feelings and fears of being victims of violent crimes. Rational thinking is not the area of discussion, the base of the argument is on fear and pain. Fear of being potential victims, pain shared with the victims thinking in solutions that sound more like revenge than justice. 

Going back to my point, in the world of The Boys this type of punitivism seems to have succeeded even in a greater way than in our current world because it has superheros as backup. If real life harsh punitivism feeds on fear and a wish for social revenge, in this world it has the positive emotions supes inspire on people as a trust certificate for the persons who may not feel that way. They are loved and worshipped celebrities, their faces are everywhere, they have thousands of fans… who would see flaws in what they do? Can you imagine a world in which we worshipped cops and soldiers like we worship celebrities? This is it, people put their blind faith in them because most of them seem to be their fans. Even the people who are against brutality in the actions of security forces would end up trusting them because they are famous people. Our culture has taught us to make ourselves blind to the bullshit we see on the celebrities we love. Fans have a strong emotional attachment to their favourite celebs and this can turn into emotional manipulation in this context. If actors or singers in real life can have a fanbase that forgets to see them as human people how would these actual superhumans not end up being worshipped as gods? 

There has always been military propaganda in entertainment but this marriage between the industries through superheros is far more sinister than that. It makes you think about the unfair amount of credibility we put in celebrities. The plane crash scene of Homelander and Maeve it’s even more devastating looking at it from that perspective. Those persons had their full trust in them and they were safer with the terrorists. Can you imagine being a Homelander fan and dying there?  That’s horrible, the last thing you get in your life is the biggest disappointment ever from someone you trusted and stanned. 

 Speaking of Homelander, he is a right wing wet dream and one of the best villians i had ever seen, he makes me feel sick with how fucking despicable he is. His character is an excellent point to start the ramble on the third wheel of this corporate nightmare. Superheros are products of the pharmaceutical industry, injected with a drug since they were babies. In his particular case, he was raised like a lab rat and the series is realistic even in this detail. The lab rat kid with superpowers is another common trope that we see pretty often and here it also gets twisted. I’m thinking for example on Eleven from Stranger Things, she has been raised by abusive scientists who treated her as an experiment, yet she is this sweet kiddo who has a hard time socializing. Instead, Homelander is a monster without conscience or mercy and seems to be severely affected by his abnormal childhood. Brilliant, he is the ultimate product of this corporative triangle and depicts everything that's wrong with it. 

The cycle is pretty clear: drugs create them, they play their role in security and their media notoriety justifies their actions. As it is shown in season one,  the security aspect of the corporate complex represented mostly in Homelander’s actions craves to grow bigger and get supes into the military since, in the startpoint of the series, they only work with cops. Since the industry feeds on fear and Vought seems to have a monopoly in the production of powered persons there were no threats big enough to justify the intervention of superhumans in wars. Dismissing the importance of this monopoly for the company, Homelander suministrates the drug to terrorist groups in an attempt to create the first super villains. This is a perfect analogy of how the american war machine works. There is no way for terrorist groups from Third World countries to get access to sophisticated war technology without help from the ones who wield that power better than anyone. The first mentions of the supe terrorists reminded me of when i was in my course of worldwide history in college and i learned there how most of those famous names in middle eastern terrorism were actually friends with the CIA before at some point. Here in South America we have other history regarding the style of USA intervention, the Plan Condor dictatorships in the 70’s and early 80’s. I was just starting my career when I had a month of history classes about the Middle East and, being pretty ignorant on the matter, it shocked me the way in which the US villainized people they used to work with. I think the series makes a great point with this part of the plot because it hints something of this war mechanics. 

Gender politics of the series: a surprisingly complex approach on the topic of sexual assault ,a realistic critic to bland white feminism and the empty cashgrabbing ways in which mainstream media adapts feminist discourse.

This topic was even a bigger surprise for me. I wasn't expecting such an interesting approach of gender issues, mostly because this is the area in which media wannabe woke messages had become more dissapointing to me lately. Specially in a show about superheros, i wasn't expecting to get very interesting points.

I will start talking of the portrayals of sexual assault. We have two sexually assaulted characters in the series, Starlight and Becca. First, i think it is great that they didn't used the "rape as character development" trope. Actually, it's cool how they mock this conceptions. When Starlight saves a woman from being raped on the streets or when she makes a public statement about her sexual assault it's the people behind her, building her public image as a character, the ones who push that trope. In the first time their great character development idea is to sexualize her outfit, after the second event mentioned they literally push her sexual assault as development. I love how the public relationships team acts oftenly in a men writing women way, serving as mirror for the most common mistakes of writers on pop culture products when they write female characters.

Going back to my point, i like the effort they putted into portraying differences in both cases. Homelander is the typical portrayal of a rapist, a narcisistic monster without remorse, a deranged son of a bitch. The Deep is also a piece of shit, but of a different kind. There is a phrase that feminists of my country had popularized " los violadores son hijos sanos del patriarcado" ( it means, the rapists are healthy sons of the patriarchy. It tries to explain they are not crazy individuals who act outside societal circunstancies), the Deep reminded me of that.

He is not crazy, he is an insecure guy with a super fragile ego who abuses women for power. Insecurity on men under patriarchy tends to become bashing of women. This is not a black and white portrayal of a sex criminal, it is surprisingly complex. Of course,his actions were unexcusable. He will never repay what he did to Starlight and other women before her but he has chances of working on his issues and, eventually if he trully wants to get better, stop being the scumbag he is. He is not a deranged criminal whose only fate is to be neutralized for the safety of others.

I think this is important because, at least in my country, i had seen people using sex offenders as an example of why countries without death penalty should implement it. I don't support extreme autoritarian security measures and it makes me sick to hear that there are people claiming those as solutions in the name of women's safety. I like the approach they took to portray The Deep as the piece of shit he is but still showing the complexity of this issue instead of going for a more traditional dichotomic way.

Back to the mocking of mainstream media's attempts of adopting a feminist approach i mentioned, the season two got even better at this commentary on the "Strong Female Character" trope with the introduction of Stormfront. She is the literal embodiment of what shitty marketing says an empowered female character must be and has the biggest "I'm not like other girls" complex ever. That interaction she had with Starlight in "pink = bad, pants = cool" mood was super annoying and blaming her for the assault?? Freaking disgusting.

Honestly, i hated her soo much even before she showed her true colours completely. Stormfront represents everything i hate in Hollywood's feminism and the crappy meaningless messages it's pushing lately. She reminds me to all the fake "woke" advertisements i had seen on tv, like a Carefree (pads brand) advertisement that pissed me off last week because with the slogan " self trust is beauty" it portrayed girls who wear make up as fake and insecure.

Now, speaking of that particular scene of her killing Kimiko's brother. I felt literally sick, even sicker than in every Homelander scene. This bitch is worst than Homelander because at least he gathers a public that serves to his views. If you ever need to provide someone with a proof of why intersectionality in feminism matters use this racist bitch. Horryfying racism hidden behind the progressive mask of a bullshit privileged version of feminism, the thing i hate the most. She has a strong nazi terf vibe. I think she absolutely applies as mirror of critic to stuff like Rowling's terf nonsense. 

The introspective look this series has regarding the multiple issues on today’s attempts of gender approach on media entertainment surprised me. It’s everything i would had wished something to point out but nobody seemed to have the guts to make it happen because, as i already said, the current trend is what it’s being focus of critic here. 

I will end this now, i feel there is plenty of more stuff to talk about but this post is getting very long and, if i get more ideas i want to discuss, i can always make a second post. As i said before, this expresses my humble opinions and i’m open to hear different interpretations that can enrich my views. 

Thanks for reading this extra long ramble. 

[nataliedanovelist]

GF - The Girls and Their Ghosts

For @evaroze, a sweet gal who inspired me with her super kawaii art. I hope you enjoyed it! And a special shout out goes to @stephreynaart and her comic, who never fails to make me laugh and I couldn’t help but include it in this piece. (There may or may not be a part 2...)

(slight name change to better fit a cute headcanon)

~~~~~~~~~~

“MOVE! MOVE! OUTTA THE WAY!”

“Ouch!”

“Sorry, sorry!”

“Oh, dear me!”

“SHADDUP! MOVE!”

“Stanley, calm down.”

“PICK UP THE PACE, SIXER, I AIN’T MISSING THIS!”

Ford rolled his eyes with a smile on his worn face, weather-beaten and tired, but he continually ran after his twin. Despite the fact that their bodies would hate them for this later, they ran through the hospital as fast as they could. They weren’t this late when Soos had his son. Luck just hadn’t been by their side this time.

After battling a fierce storm to reach the coastline, finding the Stanmobile and having to explain why they were picking it up earlier than scheduled, racing to the center of the state, and parking in an emergency handicap spot, the old sailors in their mid-eighties used all of their strength to reach the Gravity Falls Hospital in time. While Ford was beyond jubilant, Stan was the most frantic and spirited, but that didn’t mean Ford didn’t punch three jerks in the face when confronted at the docks and that he would have no issue using a recovered memory gun to wipe some cops’ memories of a speeding Diablo.

Stan jammed the button for the elevator a few times, decided it was too slow, and bolted to the stairs. Ford followed, pulling out his magnet gun, and called, “Stanley, grab hold of me!”

Inside the stair-covered hallway, Stan grabbed his brother tightly and Ford shot upward, zapping them up a few floors and they landed like cats at the door to the sixth floor. They ran down the hall and Stan counted the doors. “Four… five… six… damn it, where’s eighteen?!”

“Grunkle Stan?”

Stan would recognize that voice anywhere. He ran faster (Ford didn’t think that was even possible) and around the corner Mabel, Gideon, Soos, and Dipper and Mabel’s parents were in a small waiting lobby. Mabel skipped to the old men happily, letting her orange-haired fiancee stay behind at a safe distance, and she hugged them tightly. Ford and Stan squeezed her tightly, haven’t seen her since the summer, the old tradition of a long reunion still going strong, and they soon let her go to have a look at the beautiful young lady with long brown hair, eyes that matched their own, and black lips with pink eyeshadow.

“Well?” Ford huffed, low on oxygen.

“She’s fine, everything’s okay.” Mabel giggled and patted their shoulders. “Any minute now.”

“We did miss it?” Stan checked hopefully.

“Nope!” Mabel said cheerfully. “They wanted to be alone for this, but when the baby’s born we can all go in.”

Stan held his pounding chest and collapsed into a chair. Soos was there to pat his shoulder and welcome him home, to which he immediately asked where his grandson was and if he was too cool for him now, but Soos just laughed and said that Melody would bring him once everything had calmed down.

An hour or so passed before nurses and the doctor started to leave the room. A few more minutes passed with everyone watching the door carefully and soon a very tired-looking Dipper emerged, pinching the bridge of his nose with a bandaged hand. It was amazing how much he resembled the men before him, sturdy and strong like his Grunkle Stan, but still fluffy and favored layers of clothing, like his Grunkle Ford. Like most men in the family, he required glasses, which he happily sported, alongside a small golden band on his left hand and a brown fur coat an old friend had given to him as a wedding present. Dipper had a little bit of stubble, promising a short old dutch beard and possibly a mustache (Stan prayed not a stupid mustache), and despite the bags under his eyes and the tiniest bit of redness that circles his soft brown spears, the windows to his soul sparkled with pure joy and his smile was radiant.

In an instant, his twin sister ran to him and he engulfed her in a huge hug, one that swept her off her feet and spun her around and made her giggle like the child she was at heart. Mabel eventually let him go to ruffle his hair and then asked, “So…”

Dipper grinned, his eyes sweeping the area to see who had arrived in time, and he croaked, his throat thick with emotion, “It’s a girl.”

Mabel squealed and bounced like there were springs at the bottom of her heels. Their parents high-fived and the new grandmother looked close to tears. Soos punched Gideon’s shoulder with a smile. Stan sneakily handed Ford a ten dollar bill, both grinning widely at the arrival of their first great-grandniece. God, that made them sound ancient.

“Congratulations, Dipper!” Ford cheered and clapped a six-fingered hand on his shoulder.

“So when can we see the little princess?” Stan asked with a huge smile.

“Right now,” Dipper said and opened the door for the small crowd.

Stan slipped his beanie off and held it with hands that trembled with excitement. Every time he was allowed in a delivery room had been special. Dipper and Mabel being born had been both painful and joyful, being the first new family members that didn’t hate him or pity him. Jacob Stanley Ramirez’s birth had been honorable with tears and hugs and no hint of pain, though Stan never became a father like he had once dreamed, he was now a grandfather. Now, his own little niblings had a baby to call their own. Stan had been terrified that he might not live to see this day, so he was grateful that not only he got to be here, but that Ford was here with him.

In the bed, freshly cleaned, tired, and glowing with pride and love, Pacifica held a pink bundle in her arms. Dipper was by her side soon enough, rubbing her shoulders and kissing her forehead in thanks. Her smirk immediately went to the old men, but it was too distracted by a trembling, squealing woman her age.

“Oh my gosh, oh my gosh! Paz, she’s perfect!”

“You haven’t even seen her yet, Mabel.”

“Don’t care, she’s my niece, therefore she’s perfect!”

“Well, come here and meet your goddaughter.” Dipper chuckled.

Mabel was suddenly deadly still, the still-est she had been all day. With the color drained from her face and making her look like a vampire thanks to her mixture of pink and black outfit, she whispered, “I’m… I’m…”

The new parents nodded with supportive smiles. “No one’s better for the job, hon.” Pacifica said earnestly.

Mabel could only bite her lip as she stood by her twin and peered down at the bundle.

Stan and Ford stood by her side, now at the foot of the bed, and awed at the sight. A teeny tiny head was swaddled in the midst of the soft blanket. It was like when Stan saw those newborn twins all over again. A blank canvas with small resemblances to their parents. Stan swore this gal had that Pines’ baby button nose and she somehow already had that perfect Northwest skin complexion. His opinion may be biased, but who cares? This baby was the most beautiful Stan had ever seen (right next to his other kids, duh).

“Wow…” Stan choked. “She’s p-p-pretty.”

“Stanley, are you crying?” Ford chuckled.

“Shaddup.” He said weakly and wiped his wet eyes with his arm.

Pacifica smiled warmly and offered, “Wanna hold her, you old fart?”

With a quick cough and a clearing of his throat, Stan nodded and sat in the offered chair by Pacifica’s side. At this point the old man was an expert on accepting babies and how to hold them properly. He had been practicing since he was seventeen and got to hold Shermie’s son, who today became a grandfather and looked ready to fight Stan for a chance to hold the baby.

However, this time was different. Stan couldn’t be selfish with his time with her. She had tons of other people to love her and make sure she was happy. She didn’t need him. So much unlike Stan, who fought Shermie for five more minutes to hold the twins, and who held Jacob for hours as he cried silently, he let Ford hold the newborn after a few minutes and was content in watching. The rapid trip had tired him out.

“What’s her name?” Ford asked his grandnephew.

“Angelina Susan.” Dipper said proudly.

Everyone was merciful enough to ignore how wet Pacifica’s eyes were.

~~~~~~~~~~

Ford had been having a conversation with Dipper over mugs of coffee while Stan entertained Angel when the conversation accidentally morphed into a monologue of Dipper explaining the progress of his ghost-hunting show to his old idol. Ford was listening. Or, half-listening.

As it was customary, Stan found a new snuggle buddy by letting Dipper’s daughter sleep on his chest, a hand over Angel protectively. The baby was almost a year old now and slept with her thumb in her mouth with dirty-blonde hair that she inherited from both parents. Ford smiled at the bright child. While Stan had always been amazing with children, there was something special about Angel that Ford couldn’t quite shake. Seeing her so happy and at peace made him feel the same way.

Later that night, Ford was in the kitchen for something to drink when he heard the start of a baby’s cries. He and Stan were staying with Dipper and Pacifica for the holidays this year while the Mystery Shack was undertaking repairs, and so the old sailor had no issue assisting with the baby if he could to repay the parents for their hospitality by letting them sleep. In his cozy blue flannel pajamas, Ford quietly entered Angel’s nursery and peeked inside, his ears cursed with the stressed cries and he was determined to solve whatever problem the baby had and to put her at ease.

Angel’s cries morphed into whimpers at the sight of the old man above her crib. Her lip trembled and she held her little arms up for him. Ford chuckled and gently scooped her up. “Oh, it’s alright, my dear. It’s alright. I’m here.” He cooed softly and rubbed her back, letting Angel rest her tiny head on his shoulder. “What’s the matter, sweetheart?”

Ford ran through his big head for a diagnosis of Angel’s distress. No bad smells, no sign of pain or injury. She might be hungry, Ford thought, but just as he was about to leave with her for the kitchen to try to find some milk to give her, the aged scientist noticed something. Angel was holding him very tight. Though she was no longer wailing, she was still crying, even trembling a little, but she did not feel cold. Ford re-positioned Angel to feel her forehead, but she did not feel warm. He then saw her beautiful baby blue eyes and knew what was wrong. Angel had been terrified by something.

Ford smiled softly and held her by his shoulder again to rub her back and he swayed slightly where he stood. “It’s alright, it’s alright, my lovely. It was only a nightmare. They all go away eventually, trust me.”

He and Angel slowly settled into the rocker for restless babies and Ford gently pushed back and forward. Angel was no longer crying now, still clinging onto her uncle’s pajamas tightly, like he was a lifeline, but she was starting to calm down and understand that she was safe. “That’s it, my little angel, that’s it.” Ford praised her quietly.

A quick glance outside told him that it had started to snow in the middle of the night. He smiled at the idea of playing with Angel in the morning, wrapped up like Eskimos and enjoying the gift nature had provided. An old song came to mind and so Ford hummed it quietly to the baby. Perhaps Ma had sung it a fair few times, or maybe it was a brand new tune Ford had made up. Who knows? Regardless, soon Angel was fast asleep and the old man had no strength to get up, so Dipper would simply have to find them in the morning and sneak a picture for jokes and memories.

~~~~~~~~~~

Three years passed. Angel was a bubbly, curious child with a pair of baby twin sisters, Stella and Estelle. It was nice to know Dipper and Mabel wouldn’t be the only set of twins in the family. Mabel and Gideon had their own family, Jacob had even grown up and graduated high-school just a few weeks ago. Stan was beyond proud, and the last four years on land with Dipper and his family to help around the house and practically work at the Mystery Shack had brought its own joys as did sailing around the world. But he was tired.

Ford held his hand when he didn’t have the strength one morning to get out of bed. They had been silent, simply enjoying each other’s presence, for they had already said everything that needed to be said. Not only said it, but said it a million times in the years they had spent sailing around the world and retiring in Gravity Falls together. But Ford wanted to assure his brother of one thing, detecting how hard he was fighting to stay.

He cleared his throat, squeezed his twin’s hand, and croaked, “You can let go, Stanley.”

Stan chuckled weakly. “Nah, I ain’t ready to go. Believe it or not, there’s still something I wanna stick around for.”

Ford smiled at that. He had feared that after so many years of neglect and only staying alive because he had something to do, that when there was nothing to do, he wouldn’t have the will to stay. He was beyond relieved to discover he was wrong. “What is that?”

Stan gave his brother a cocky look, despite being so tired and weak. “My family, Sixer. I’m not leaving them anytime soon.”

Ford found that he completely understood, and privately agreed. “Neither am I.”

~~~~~~~~~~

Not many people thought Ford would last long after Stan died, but the eldest twin managed to stick around for five years before he died of a peaceful heart attack in his sleep. The Pines family were saddened, but they were also happy that the brothers were reunited and that they had both lived full and happy lives. And they knew them well enough to know they would not have been pleased if everyone was sad and made their names taboo.

Angel remembered her grunkles vividly. She was eight when Grunkle Ford died and she took it hard, being very close to him and admiring him like her father before her had, but her family helped her get through it and Dipper assured her daughter that he was happy. That was all Angel cared about.

There were times she enjoyed being a big sister, and times she didn’t. Stella and Estelle caused so much trouble and were the biggest handful anyone had ever seen. Ford once said before he died that the girls gave him and Stan a run for their money. It was like the girls had unknowingly accepted a challenge, and now were pure trouble-making terrors that kept Gravity Falls interesting thanks to their father’s curiosity and their mother’s attitude.

One night, when Angel was ten, she left her room for a glass of water or milk, something to satisfy her thirst, and she tiptoed across the dark house with a smile, the glow of the moon creating squares on the floor through the windows, perfect for quiet hopscotch. Angel stopped at the fireplace that showcased so many old photos. There was the picture of Mommy and Grandma Susan in the diner, waitresses together, and pictures of weddings, fishing trips, holidays, and just hanging out with Aunt Mabel and Uncle Gideon and Uncle Soos and Jacob. One picture Angel carefully picked up and smiled at.

She was only a baby in this picture, maybe a few weeks old, and Grunkle Ford was holding her as he sat in an armchair (she had seen that same chair at the Mystery Shack), with Grunkle Stan leaning against the seat, ruffling his brother’s hair and smiling at the baby. Angel became a little sad; she didn’t remember Grunkle Stan as well as she remembered Grunkle Ford, but she loved them both and missed them. She took the framed photograph with her into the kitchen and looked at it as she drank her water at the table, remembering all she could.

Angel could remember the sound of Grunkle Ford’s voice. It was low and heavy, but soft and comforting, like a weighted blanket. He used that voice to read her stories, using a different voice or accent for each character and even doing the sound effects, whether Angel asked him to or not. She could also remember him and Aunt Mabel knitting and showing Angel how to do it. She didn’t have the patience to learn, but she liked watching the yarn magically turn into clothing and listening to the two swap stories.

Angel can remember Grunkle Ford’s shadow puppets. He was the best at it, and sometimes he would shine a light against a wall, build a mini pillow fort for Angel to rest on, and make pictures on the wall with his special hands. Susie had a vague memory of once saying she wishes she had six fingers so she was more like Grunkle Ford. And he may or may not have started to cry, though Angel to this day had no idea why.

As for Grunkle Stan she mostly only remembered him through Grunkle Ford; Angel was only three when Grunkle Stan died, and all she could remember independently was a very distinct laugh and his smile, but she could remember everything Grunkle Ford said about him and the stories he told. Everyone always said how great Grunkle Stan was, despite being a conman. Angel grinned at the idea of having such amazing relatives, both old men cunning and crafty and willing to do anything for their families. She really missed them.

Angel sighed and left her empty glass alone to put the picture back on the fireplace. As she passed the TV, a video tape fell out of a box below the screen, though she could have sworn she had never touched it. Angel grinned at that; she had a feeling something funny had happened before, but she told herself grief was imagining something that wasn’t there.

She picked up the tape and grinned to find a familiar cursive handwriting on some tape on the top of the black box. Angel quickly slid it into the very old machine and turned on the TV quietly, then sat on the carpeted floor before the glowing screen. What she saw made her jubilant and she had to bite her lip to keep from squealing.

Thirty minutes later she hurried to her sisters’ bedroom and shook them away, climbing on the ladder of the bunk-bed to reach Estelle and kicking Stella awake. “Girls! Get up!”

“What?” Estelle snorted, rubbing her eyes.

“Why?” Stella groaned, burying her head under her pillow.

“There’s something you gotta see, now c’mon!” Angel urged and eventually pulled the twins by their wrists out of bed and practically dragged them out of the room.

Stella and Estelle were a bit less pissed when they saw the TV was on and all Angel wanted was for them to watch something, so they settled on the couch with their sister and Angel re-winded it to a certain point. The twins gasped to find an uncle they didn’t remember on screen.

“My name’s Stanley Pines.” He said seriously, in his beanie, boxers, slippers, and stained undershirt, sitting in his famous armchair. “I was sixty-seven when I made this tape, but now… I’m dead.” He said in a low voice with a strained face and wide eyes, then wiggled his fingers and asked with laughter in his throat, “Trapped in a box underground! Pretty spooky, huh? Haha!”

There it was! That laugh Angel could so distinctly remember. She grinned at hearing that laugh again and glanced down at her sisters, both wide-eyed with wonder.

A sharp voice that was slightly more recognizable interrupted Grunkle Stan’s laugh. “Stanley!” Grunkle Ford scolded behind the camera, while Grunkle Stan rolled his eyes. “Stan, this is for future Pines generations, the children Dipper and Mabel will have that we might not get to meet, their grandchildren! Surely you have a message you want to leave them.”

“Alright alright, I do.” Grunkle Stan said and smiled at the camera as he pointed at his audience. “Remember to work hard and that family always comes first. Also,” Now Grunkle Stan grew slightly more serious again. “I have several pounds of gold and millions in unmarked bills in a safe buried under the Shack, next to the…” His face suddenly dropped, and then their grunkle went on to over-exaggerate, putting a hand to his chest to fake a heart attack, then proceeded to limp over his chair with his tongue sticking out, making dying noises.

As the twins were laughing loudly and probably waking up their parents and Angel tried to shush them but was giggling nonetheless, the camera spun around and Grunkle Ford appeared on screen. “I’m sorry, kids, but this is what I have to work with.” Then he raised an eyebrow annoyingly as Grunkle Stan continued to make dying noises.

Angel paused the TV as the girls tried to silence their laughter, but despite Stella biting her shirt and Estelle holding her breath until she was blue, all three couldn’t help but laugh, not only from the comedic scene recorded for them, but the overwhelming joy they had from seeing their grunkles. Not only seeing their grunkles, but via a message they had created just for them.

Stella wiped a teary eye and asked, “Is that it?”

Angel shook her head. “No, there’s thirty minutes of Grunkle Ford just talking to us and showing us their favorite things, even the Stan O’ War. That was just my favorite part.”

“Forget sleep!” Stella said and ran off for the kitchen. “Start the movie over! I’ll make popcorn!”

“I’ll get the drinks!” Estelle volunteered and followed her twin to the kitchen.

Angel smiled, loving the idea of seeing her family again, and alone in the room, she could feel a presence she couldn’t quite explain, but she looked at the old men in the photograph above the fireplace and whispered, “Thanks, guys. I miss you.”

Meanwhile, invisible to the Earth they dwelled on, Stan stood by his niece with his brother by his side. Proudly grinning, he clamped a hand over Ford’s shoulder and said, “They love us!”

Ford smiled and chuckled, his eyes still on his little angel, who looked at the picture hungrily. With any luck, she won’t miss them for much longer.

[angelsswirl]

Petrichor

Seven

⚠️ This Chapter is rated mature for sexual content⚠️

Notes: Happy Holidays everyone! Here's a present from me to you! (Dont worry I'm still on break, this has always been scheduled for a Christmas present)

..

"I hate to think about you with somebody else. Our love has gone cold. You're intertwining your soul with somebody else."

"Can I help you?" Jisoo opened her front door with a bored look on her face.

"How long are you going to be mad at me? It's starting to get annoying." You crossed your arms over your chest. Your jaw clenched and eyes locked in a semi-permanent glare.

"What makes you think I'm mad at you?" Jisoo frowned stubbornly.

"Oh, I get it now. You're a dumbass. Can't believe I hadn't noticed it sooner."

"Now, hold on." Jisoo held up a hand.

You poked a finger in Jisoo's chest, "You think you're all high and mighty just because you haven't slept with anybody else. I have needs, Jisoo! You don't get to decide who I do or don't sleep with."

Jisoo backed further into the apartment to avoid the probing finger. You followed her with a determined look in your eye. The door slammed shut behind you.

"You could have came to me!" Jisoo hollered, an almost imperceptible growl bubbled beneath the words.

"Your child was sick!"

"You didn't know that!"

"What was I supposed to do? Walk over here and ask you if you were available, then when you said no, head over to where I was going in the first place?" You sighed and shook your head, "One of us is missing the point, and it is not me."

Jisoo scowled even harder somehow. Her jaw is clenched and she's looking at the framed picture just passed your head.

"Are you 'having needs' right now?"

"I'm always 'having needs' because of stupid alphas like you!"

Before you can even blink, Jisoo has you pressed against the nearest wall, with her lips on yours.

It's a lot of clashing teeth and nipped lower lips, and you whimpered desperately or maybe that was Jisoo, you had somehow become so intertwined so quickly, it never became obvious.

Jisoo nipped lightly at your neck. A smirk danced across her kiss swollen lips. You shuddered.

Your back arched away from the wall as Jisoo's hand traveled down your still clothed stomach and into your jeans.

Jisoo groaned, "You're soaked." She pulled her hand back from its destination part way before returning.

"So I've been told."

Jisoo growled lowly, "Really? You want to be petty right now? With my hand down your pants?"

"What better time than the present?"

Jisoo's fingers traced the outline of your folds lightly, occasionally, grazing over your clit. Her movement is hindered by the tightness of your jeans, but she's determined to get you off like this first.

So, she pushed her her hand back down roughly. The heel of her palm brushed harshly against your center. Her fingers circling your entrance.

"Well, if you're so keen on talking during this, now would be the perfect time for you to beg."

You choked down a whimper, "Y-You know, you're at like the perfect distance for me to knee your dick into your throat, right?"

"So is that a no?"

"It's a keep talking and see what happens-Fuck!" Jisoo mentally patted herself on the back for that one. Her index finger curled slightly inside of you.

You couldn't have even begun to choke back the resulting whimper.

"You were saying?" A raised eyebrow accompanied her smirk. You made sure to clench your eyes shut.

"Do you make it your mission to be this insufferable?" You bit your lip as Jisoo pulled her hand out once again. You absolutely refused to beg, or do anything that would suggest you wanted Jisoo to put her hand back out of pure spite.

Jisoo, for her part, wasn't even thinking about that anymore. She had foregone her original plan. You weren't cooperating and Jisoo's straining painfully against her own shorts.

She leaned in to nip at your neck again. Her nose pressed firmly to your scent gland.

Jisoo never answered the question.

Instead, she dipped her thumbs into the waistband of your jeans and underwear. She pushed them down enough so they were out of her way.

"Jisoo." You breathed out, you were suddenly facing the wall. Jisoo pressed against you lightly.

You could feel Jisoo. Her arousal. Her breathe on your shoulder. Her hands roaming underneath your shirt, you have a feeling Jisoo won't bother to take that off of you.

Your suspicions are confirmed when there's a rustling of clothing, none of which involve anything you're still technically wearing. The heat of Jisoo's body left for about all of three seconds, before she returns sans shorts.

Jisoo chuckled into your ear, "Is this how you thought your morning would go when you woke up. Me, you, and this wall?"

You pressed your overheated face onto said wall. The cold drywall cooled your face almost immediately, "Fuck you."

"What do you think im trying to do?"

Jisoo nestled nicely between your thighs. Her hips slowly pumping back and forth.

You groaned, "Chu, please. I want you inside me."

Jisoo resisted the urge to fist pump, "Since you asked so nicely. I'm never letting you live this down, by the way."

You're sure under any other circumstances, you would have kicked her feet out from under her, but Jisoo's finally inside of you and you're not even totally sure what you were even thinking about three seconds earlier.

~•~

"Don't think this means I'm not still mad at you." You huffed petulantly as you adjusted all of your clothing back onto your body, the way it had been when you came in.

"Yeah, I'm not too thrilled with you either at the moment. Truce?" Jisoo shuffled back into her shorts. She held out her hand toward you.

You just stared at it, "Fine, truce." Your brows furrowed for a second before widening comically, "Where's your kid?"

Jisoo looked back at you confused for a moment, "Kid? What ki-Oh! She's at my parents for the week. You didn't think I'd have sex with you in my living room if she was here, did you? Of course not, I'd do it in the kitchen."

"I really can't stand you." You rolled your eyes before heading for the door.

"Then why do you keep talking to me?"

"Because Irene's already mated!" You shouted over your shoulder.

"Hey! Low blow!"

You only laughed as you exited the apartment.

~•~

She hates Whole Foods. She really does, but Lia's got allergies and it's the easiest place to shop for her.

She figured now was a good time to go grocery shopping. She wouldn't have to deal with the ankle biter pointing to every single flavor of Cheerios she recognized and pouting until Jisoo put it into the basket.

Speaking of Cheerios, Jisoo found herself in the cereal aisle. She grabbed a large box of plain Cheerios for Lia, then Lucky Charms for herself.

She was about to continue down the aisle, when her cart clipped someone in the back of the ankle.

"Sorry about that."

The owner of the ankle turned around with an easy smile.

"It's all good."

Jisoo's face lit up with recognition, only for the it to practically get slapped off her face with recognition of a different variety.

Jisoo is suddenly struck with the urge to maybe punch this woman in the face, she eventually decided that probably wasn't a good look.

Jisoo assumed she can probably sense you on her too and that's not good.

She breifly wondered if they were going to have to fight in the cereal aisle of this local Whole Foods, but then the other woman just says, "Hey, Jisoo. Long time no see."

"Yeah. It's been a while, Chaeyoung."

Rosé nodded resolutely before going about her business. Trying to get away from Jisoo as quickly as possible.

Jisoo decided to too, groceries be damned.

~•~

"You know it's no fun if you don't help." You smiled, you stared at Jisoo for a minute, waiting for her to respond.

Jisoo was supposed to be helping you clean your apartment. Instead, she had just been standing near your front door for the better part of 15 minutes. When Jisoo doesn't say anything, you just go back to cleaning with a small frown.

It isn't until 15 more minutes pass, that Jisoo actually does speak. You will forever fondly remember this next part as 'My Worst Nightmare Come To Life'.

"Do I even have a chance?" Jisoo wasn't looking at you. She only stared at the ceiling. Her hands clench to fists in her jeans pockets.

"What are you talking about?" You asked softly. You slowly placed your cleaning supplies onto the sofa.

"You have Rosé Fucking Park knocking on your door, and you still give me the time of day? Why?" Jisoo's shoulders shrugged nearly to her ears. She wrestled herself off the wall, then let her eyes drift to you.

"Because I-" Your chest hurt. Your eyes stung, and your head ache. You felt like you were curling in on yourself.

This was the very thing you didn't want to happen. You were supposed to choose one of them before they found out, so you didn't lose both of them.

"I thought-I thought. I don't know what I thought, but it doesn't matter anymore." Jisoo glared, not necessarily at you. Just at life in general. She glared at the very unfortunate hand she had been dealt.

"Wait. How did-Do you know Rosé?"

Jisoo shrugged again, "We went to college together, sung in the choir. But that's irrelevant. You could have told me. I wouldn't have gotten mad or anything. Or stopped letting you see Lia. Dammit, always second place."

"Chi-Jisoo, you're not second place." You choked on a sob. You can feel it. Jisoo's pulling away from you. And you sort of feel like you're been torn in two.

"So, I'm first?" Jisoo looked back up at you slowly. A subtle hopeful look bled into your eyes.

"Jisoo, I-" You swallowed harshly.

"Yeah. It sounds like you have a choice to make." Jisoo rubbed the back of neck, then headed for the door.

"Jisoo please." You went to reach for Jisoo's hand but stopped yourself.

"I'm just going to head out." Jisoo placed her hand on the door knob. She only hesitated a few beats before shaking her head and opening it.

"Soo..." The tears are leaking from your eyes in full force now. Jisoo continued to walk out the door.

It doesn't slam shut behind her, which you appreciated.

You wondered if you should call Chaeyoung, but you don't think you could handle her not picking up. You're not even sure if you could handle Chaeyoung actually picking up either, for that matter.

What would you even say?

That you were sorry? That you didn't mean to hurt anyone?

It all seemed a little too late for that.

[stevie-rcgers]

The Roman Word for Love // III

Bucky Barnes x Reader

Summary: where you had bruises, cuts, and scars your soulmate got flowers. everyone is born with one soulmate. bucky barnes lived long enough to have two.

Word Count: 1,100+

Rating/Warnings: none

a/n: WOOOOO. now that we got all that exposition out of the way let’s get on with it shall we. a big thank you to @bipcoin and @speedypan for helping me edit this <3 additionally, if you would like the be tagged pls send an ask. it's easier for me to keep track and make sure everyone who would like to be tagged is. thank you guys soo much 

*additional a/n at the end 

Previous | Next ; masterlist

Bucky sat silently at the edge of the bed. He was always awake before dawn. Blue eyes watched as particles danced in the rays leaking through the spaces between the blinds; golden light began pouring steadily into the space, cutting through the thick darkness of his room.

It was simple. Cream colored walls decorated simply with dark furniture and dark sheets, accented only by the small potted plants he’d brought from his time with T'Challa and his sister.

It’d been a long time since he had had a real place to live. A lifetime since he had somewhere to truly call his own. A real bed, an address, a place he could feel safe. It was nice.

Slowly he pushed himself off his already tidied bed and dragged himself through the rest of the empty apartment to the kitchen. Even at this ungodly hour, his roommate had already gone out for his morning jog with Sam, a routine for theirs from the past the pair had recently restarted.

It was a simple apartment. Full of simple things, chronically clean. A modern design style complimented by the plethora of things that reminded him of the old days; the old mahogany radio perched on the kitchen island and the gramophone prominently displayed in their living room were among his favorites.

He ate his breakfast on their small balcony, watching the play called humanity play out before him. He watched as mothers waited with their children for the school bus, spotted couples dancing in the morning sun, sharing a sweet moment. It was comforting knowing that even after seventy years the world had mostly stayed the same.

In the natural light, he traced the lines on his skin. Soft pensive expression on his face. Since little Morgan pointed them out he’d found himself searching for any others. He had them all over his body, small for the most part. He found himself keen to trace the one on his finger the most, it was the only one that was constantly visible, the most visceral reminder.

He wasn’t sure how he felt about them. No. He felt too many things about them. Chiefly, he felt hopeful and that made him uncomfortable. His life had been so cruel. He had been present for all the unfair things fate had in store. Why would it start being kind to him now?

He was afraid. Bucky Barnes was afraid to let himself find happiness, afraid that he’d pull his soulmate into a world of hurt and pain. Be too complicated.

A dark grey cloud of despair settled on his muscular shoulders as he tumbled down the rabbit hole of negative thoughts. He sat in the silence for a while longer until the morning twittering of the birds urged him from his seat.

Rising, he walked to the kitchen, placed his dishes in the sink to soak, then moved to his bathroom. He needed a shower. The cool water refreshing against his hot skin, clarity and the closest thing he had to peace returned to him, easing his spiraling mind.

He let himself think of his past, the good parts. Running around Brooklyn with Steve getting into trouble, his family, the Howling Commandos, Peggy, and finally Dot. The fond memories lifting his spirits as he dried off.

He wondered how they had lived, if they ever thought of him before they...

He felt himself slipping back to the sorrow of regret and lost love, lost life, longing for what could have been. He swallowed hard, an attempt to recenter himself. He'd found closure, or at least he thought he had, but he couldn't deny that the feelings still lingered.

He wanted to let them all know he was okay.

The resolve picked him up a little. He had never really had the time for a visit. What would he say? How would he explain everything to them? The bittersweetness followed him as he closed the apartment door behind him. He’d need to pick up some flowers for their graves on the way.

Steve let his eyes take in the sight of your face across the round cafe table, your hair blowing in the soft midday wind. It had been nearly two months since he’d last seen you, weeks since the tearful phone call he placed to let you know he was safe.

“How have you been?” Steve spoke first as you set your baby blue mug back down on the table.

“I’ve been good.”

You took the opportunity to take the sight of him in. His impossibly blue eyes cool in the mild heat, his beautiful blonde locks glistening in the sun. He looked like a vision, relaxed, rested, refreshed or at the very least more so then you had ever seen him.

You filled him in on your life since he had been away and Steve did the same, concealing only a few details to keep you from worrying, informing you of his decision to pass on the shield, telling you about the family he had made from himself in this century.

A moment passed sweetly between you, exchanging optimistic smiles at the fortune the universe had afforded you both. The conversation flowed easily. This was your favorite part about being around him, everything came so naturally.

“So, Rogers, what are your plans?” You asked softly, timidly breaking the silence.

Steve leaned back in his chair, pensive. His thoughts wandered to his lost friends, what they had given him: a chance at a real life. What were his plans?

“What’s it like, the world?” He asked almost comically, an internal query having unconsciously escaped. Steve had been awake for over twelve years yet he still felt a little lost. He had always been a soldier. A hero watching from afar, protecting, caught up in bigger things. He had never had time to find his place or where he fit in.

“Why don’t you find out for yourself?” You asked in a whisper leaning toward him in your chair, excited.

You often forgot that behind it all, Steve was from another era, transplanted to your time, stolen from his. Relatively speaking, this world was still so new to him. You brightened at the realization that you could be a part for his journey, “I’d be happy to come along.”

A smile spread on his face at the suggestion, “I’d like that.”

The two of you continued the light-hearted banter as Steve walked you home; the sun slinking behind the horizon, his coat wrapped around you. Exchanging goodnights, you handed it back to him as you reached your doorstep, watching as he pulled it back onto his impossibly broad shoulders.

From your open doorway, you touched the cut on your right index finger as he left. A bittersweet feeling burned at your heart. If Steve Rogers wasn’t the person meant for you, your soulmate, who in the world was?

Previous | Next ; masterlist

a/n: i will be switching to a weekly upload schedule for TRWFL. i love writing this fic and i need about 5-8 days to write, edit, and fully put together a full chapter. see you guys soon for part IV. <3 -jae

TRWFL Taglist: @smileyishere92 @shhh-no-ones-home  @rootcrop @lovely-geek @ziablackkat @shh-no-ones-home

[polyvirnl]

In Memoriam

Petals In Ambivalence prologue

Inspired by Link Start - Lies Stopped! by DawnWave on ao3

So I found a couple DawnWave Sword Art meets Miraculous books and decided I needed more, so heres a short one while I write the actual story.

This Au is the Black Lotus AU ((and while I realize that makes it sound like Marinette is in a Red Player guild, or taking Kiritio's place in SAO, its not, its literally just bc her handle is Lotus ingame, and i wanted a some cool alias's for it.))

Also,,, its gonna be maribat of some sort probably

The somber grey sky cried as Marinette stumbled to school, something that was fitting on that day. Adorned with black button up and slacks, grey shoes and ribbons, and a single freying bracelet on her wrist, Marinette concentrated on her breathing, feeling the cold sink into her bones while her umbrella lay unused in her hand.

She sighed as she tucked it away in her bag, the school growing closer with it’s perilous stone staircases and manipulative foxes lying in wait.

Since Lila had joined the school again a month ago, she had been steadily gaining support in the school, swaying everyone with a wag of her tongue, despite the outrageous lies she boasted. Normally, Marinette was nearly late and Lila was in the classroom before her arrival-that is to say, everyone was present before her arrival.

But not today.

Today she framed her bruised eyes like battle scars, the more readily pronounced bags a testament to how she slept that night; not a wink.

She knew she wouldn't have slept well, knew the likelihood of waking up with an aching throat and haggard voice- so she simply worked and worked, schoolwork, designs, scrolling through monotonous posts online, anything to keep her mind and memories quiet, if not silent.

Marinette fiddled with her bracelet as she walked up the stairs and through the hallway, not surprised when the door she opened displayed a distinct lack of person in the room, something unheard of since she had caught up with school and rejoined.

Her things were placed in an orderly manner on her desk in the back, her notes from last night queued on her tablet, waiting for power to be turned on to be used. Her arms were crossed on the wooden surface, head turned to stare out the window with glassy, unseeing orbs.

She didn't know how early she was, or how long she waited there, alone, before her classmates started piling in, first the early birds, like Sabrina and Max, then the giggling pairs like Rose and Juleka. No one mentioned Marinette’s lackluster presence, and she had a distant thought about if they thought she was someone else, or if they didn't care anymore. Not that she was like this today for attention. She was like this in attention, in a walking memorial of those who were lost for years, a survivor who had been lost but had finally come home three years ago.

Lila and a small portion of her posse came in. Marinette didn't stirr, not moving her eyes from the dusty window pane with the sky's tears trickling down and pelting it as if to break through and steal her away, to leave a changeling in her place with none the wiser but herself.

In the reflection of the glass, she noticed faintly as Kim walked up to his desk, that Max beside him wore the same ensemble as her, black as the night except for his dark grey glasses.

Lila’s shrill voice was breaking her shield of inattention, forcing her to listen even as she subtly pressed her hands over sensitive ears until they burned. That is, until she heard a familiar name, and a pool of dread dripped over her heart with an unflinching fist.

“Of course- that was before he and Alice got together, I was the one who got them together by the way!”

Maybe I misheard, maybe she can be a decent person for once-

Adrien stumbled in, funeral clothes like two others, grey faced and tired. He greeted them all with a small, scratchy voice.

“ The game was honestly a blast, I don't know why so many people died ! It was soo easy, but maybe I'm just that good?”

Adrien stopped where he was placing his things, face growing more pale by the second, turning slowly to stare at her.

Lila flashed a devious smirk at the ground at his attention.

“What the hell are you talking about.” He almost whispered, and the class froze. Marinette raised her head and made to stand.

“Sword Art Online of course! I was telling them all about my adventures with Kirito and Alice and the other front liners, I was stuck in that death game for years you know. I'm pretty sure its been coming back up in the media recently too~”

Marinette’s fists trembled, and Adrien eyes went glassy as he lurched out of the room.

“Lila Rossi.”

Everyone whipped around to see Marinette standing with feirce eyes.

“What.”

“Are you aware of the reason SAO has been resurfacing in the media.”

Lila sputtered.

“Of course I do, Its to celebrate the newer games being released!”

A pencil snapped, and the class glanced at an ashen faced Max, his eyes widening.

“No Lila. It's for the memorial of the dead players on the third year marker of the trap being beaten and the living players released.” She took a breath, and addressed the class as they whispered to themselves. “If you would have paid attention. Three of your classmates, are wearing funeral colors, Max, would you like to tell them why?”

“Of course, Marinette. I would assume, from how Adrien ran out, and Marinette looks, that they either played the game, knew someone who was trapped in the game, knew someone who died in the game, were a beta tester but didn't play the game, had family in the game, or had family or otherwise close contact with someone that helped in the original manufacturing before Akihiko Kayaba's dangerous tampering. Therefore, they are in mourning colors to respect the 3,853 fallen players, as well as those 6,147 living, and may be attending the memorial service that will be conducted later this afternoon.”

“Thank you Max.”

Lila sneered, out of view from those under her control before widening her eyes and crying,” I ju-just didnt want t-to think about al-all my friends that died…”

“How could you two bring that up?” Alya snapped, hugging the ‘forlorn’ girl.

“What exactly is going on in here?” Ms. Mendeliev stood in the doorway, surveying the chaos.

“Marinette and Max brought up Lila’s friends from that game, and she got sad.”

“From that game?”

“Yeah from when she was stuck in SAO!” Rose helpfully explained with a reassuring squeeze of Lila's shoulder.

Ms. Mendeleiev’s eyebrow rose comically.

“Miss Rossi, you are aware that it is on record who was and was not in Sword Art, specifically so that we teachers and staff know to be careful of PTSD among other things?”

“...No.”

“Miss Dupain-Chèng, with your consent?”

“Why do you need Marinette’s permission?” Juleka murmered, confused.

“Its alright, go right ahead madame.”

“Class, and specifically you, Miss Rossi, this school hosts exactly two international players from the virtual death game MMO, Sword Art Online. These players include one male, and one female, also known as One Marinette Dupain-Chèng-.”

A still pale Adrien returned with a furious Chloe.

“Ah, Mr. Agreste, perfect timing, are you willing for me to tell your classmates about what we discussed in the hall?”

“Sure…”

“Very well. As I was saying, the two players in this school, are one Miss Marinette Dupain-Chèng, and one Mr. Adrien Agreste.”

The two stared at each other, looking over each other. Marinette stood strong under the class's bewildered gaze, nodding in acknowledgment to Adrien.

Tikki patted her from inside her purse as Lila started up again, clearly scrambling for excuses.

“M-My mother! My mother didnt write my name on the record because she thought that I would get bullied for it!”

“While that may have been possible in other cases, the players of Sword Art are public record, seperate from their alias ingame so as to not promote grudges lasting to the outside.”

Mendeleiev sighed, almost bored, and brushed the topic away as if the students were not edging away from Lila and shooting looks of disapointment, shock, and disbelief at her.

“Anyway, carrying on, as Caline has called in sick, I will be filling in for her. Open your books to page 208, and start annotating. Adrien, Marinette, and Max, if you need to step outside for a moment to calm down, do so.

Max shook his head, replacing his broken pencil with another, as Marinette and Adrien stepped mechanically towards the door.

Outside, it was quiet for a moment.

“Do you plan to go to the memorial today?”

“Father is still unsure If he will allow it. It will probably be crowded, and it does seem like it's going to be a pretty public event…”

“I could send you the e-vite to the online one, or videochat you from the one at the tower?”

“I would like that, please send me the evite, in case he doesn't allow me to go.”

“...What was your handle?”

“Luciole, yours?”

“Rōtasu.”

Notes:

*Luciole means firefly, *Rōtasu means Lotus

[wendip-week]

Wendip Bits from the GF Complete Series Commentary/Lost Legends Comic

Hey all!  @ddp456 here!

So, in between helping Kenzoe64 with the last few pages of the Protector comic and working on chapters of DBR3 (yes, I swear it’s still coming) I’ve had a bit of a secret project I’ve been working on (and to be honest, I’m kinda surprised no one else beat me to it)

Over the last few months, I’ve had a chance to rewatch Gravity Falls through the newly released Complete Series Blu Ray set, and for this, listened to every commentary created for each episode, as well as those made for the special features disc (which forgive me if I’m wrong, but was for the BD set, right?).

While the tracks give a HUGE insight on all things GF, it also unveils the curtain on many things Wendy and Dipper related; some things I guessed correctly from the very beginning (see my personal notes for bragging rights), and some, well, that kinda shocked me, and left me uncertain about a few details.  But I’m getting ahead of myself.

As you can guess, think of this as a dissection of the commentaries given, focusing on our favorite duo from the series, and afterwards, I’ll include a few questions of my own.  Fair enough?  Let’s get started:

(Tidbits in the first few episodes)

-Alex Hirsch states that Dipper’s crush on Wendy was always meant to be a big part of the series.

-Hirsch wanted to drop Wendip hints in the first episode (Tourist Trapped), but Rob Renzetti (Supervising producer director, creator of My Life As a Teenage Robot) talked him out of it, saying that he was doing it way too soon.

-The age difference between Dipper and Wendy was the very first conflict that came to mind in the writer’s room, so therefore, it was used.

-The persona of Wendy herself was crafted like that of a “cool camp counselor” so that she could do cool adult stuff, and be able to do “kid stuff” as well without being out of place.

(The Inconveniencing)

-The Cold Open for Episode 5 (Roof Time!) was created at the last minute because the writers realizes that the Wendy/Dipper connection really wasn’t justified.  The roof sequence was to make not only Dipper fall in love with Wendy, but the audience as well.  (D’aww!  - Editor’s note)

-At the end of the episode, the second “Zipped Lips” motion between Wendy and Dipper symbolized many things.  It shows that Dipper (despite lying) is accepted by Wendy into her social circle, and given her friendship.  Her lying to the other teens is just as important, as she does so without Dipper asking her to.  This was done to make Wendy as real as humanly possible, showing that she is just as cool as Dipper (and we as an audience) make her out to be.

-Hirsch often laments on the fact that they didn’t do a full “Wendy-themed” episode.  He explains that the point of many episodes is that a said character “learns a sin” and they were afraid to do so with Wendy, in fears that it would ruin her chemistry.  (more on this later - Editor’s note)

-They foreshadow the conflict over Robbie and Dipper (involving Wendy) and recognizes that things weren’t always realistic (e.g. how Dipper can beat up the Multi-Bear, but how he was deathly afraid of Robbie).  Hirsch’s reasoning is that the audience seems forgiving with such exaggeration as long as everyone appeared to stay in character ( again, more on this later - Editor’s note)

(Double Dipper)

-Originally, Double Dipper had nothing to do with Wendy (GASP! - Editor’s note)  The original premise was about Mabel trying to set up a party so she could mingle with the citizens of Gravity Falls, and make new friends, and Dipper, being the anti-social opposite of her, tries to prevent this at every turn, only to fail.  It was only when at the last moment, someone suggested to have Dipper’s story be about Wendy.

-During the slow dance scene, the animators specific added a shot of Wendy from Dipper’s POV so that we (the audience) could understand and feel the same anxiety that he did at that moment.

-At the dance of the episode, Hirsch and the rest of the crew theorize about what happens when Dipper goes back inside the Shack at the end of the night.  He specifically asked, “Do you guys think he asks Wendy to dance?”  The rest of the crew disagree, saying they can picture Dipper trying to dance on his own, and Wendy cheering him on, sprinkling confetti on him from afar like in the beginning of the episode. 

(Cute, but what about this? 

is it non-canon, now?  Did the commentary happen before the real Journal 3 was written?  Or is it presumed that Dipper lied in the journal?  What the fuck?  - Editor’s note)

(Irrational Treasure)

-Going off on a tangent, Hirsch describes Dipper’s crush on Wendy as “creepy” and “over-the-top.”  He details that it’s Dipper’s seriousness that leads to misfortune, and for that, he takes a lot of lumps. 

-The Zodiac is mentioned here, and the writers explain that the Ice wasn’t always related to Wendy.  The symbol was random.

-And as a cute sidenote, the “binkies” that the Pines twins have at the back of their heads were taken from the same ones that the Mario Bros. have.

(Time Traveler’s Pig)

-Alex Hirsch goes hard on Dipper here.  He explains that Dipper has a very naive, yet forgivable, but wrong idea about romance.

-He feels that Dipper would die a thousands deaths to have Wendy feel the same way about him.

-Dipper is desperate to have this perfect moment, this perfect day with Wendy, because he believes that he’s not perfect on his own (told ya’ all! - Editior’s note)

-Hirsch says because of this, Dipper doesn’t deserve to get what he wants.  This idea of how the world works shouldn’t be rewarded.

-He adds that creating the lessons above was the hardest part of writing the episode.

(Fight Fighters)

-Hirsch knew that the “crush” angle was getting old, but he loved the story presented here.  He says that “Dipper’s heart was in the right place” when defending Wendy against Robbie.  (again, take that, internet!  - Editor’s note)

-Hirsch was blown away by the internet’s response to the episode, shocked to see how many people have had a negative reaction to it.  At this point, Jason Ritter (voice of Dipper) responses, “What?!  Love doesn’t die, guys!

-Alex goes into how he doesn’t care for “shipping,” that the “Wendy/Dipper” stories come from need for conflict, but not from character relationships.  With Wendy involved, Dipper is motivated, desperate, and will do the most insane things.

-He agrees with internet that the crush wasn’t really going anywhere, but he loved the W&D scripts that kept coming in.

-Robbie’s calling out Wendy like a dog (C’mon, out, girl!) was ad-libbed by TJ Miller.

-Hirsch believes that if left alone, Robbie would have never fought Dipper.  He was jealous that his girlfriend was going off on all these weird adventures with this kid.  (Wait, so there are untold Wendy/Dipper adventures out there?!  - Editor’s note)

-The height difference between Wendy and Dipper literally comes from Alex’s real life (and his twin, Ariel, was taller, like Mabel), where he was the smallest kid in class, and his science partner in school was regular sized, and also, his secret crush.

(The Deep End)

-The episode was always meant to be a non-serious, low-stakes piece.  Dipper’s having a good time with Wendy was not meant as romantic, but as friends.

-Wendy was originally meant to have a two piece bikini, but the network made them change it (So, wait, it wasn’t a homage to the Sandlot’s Lifeguard Wendy? - Editor’s note)

(Boyz Crazy)

-Hirsch regrets not clarifying the Robbie/Wendy/Dipper portion at the end.

-He insists that the hidden message in the song was mere coincidence.  Wendy was not hypnotized. 

-He sees the situation as follows:  Dipper is jealous that Wendy is into Robbie’s music.  For this, Dipper figures there has to be a sinister reason for this. 

-Robbie definitely stole the music, but didn’t know that the message was there.  Hirsch says as a child, he was personally fascinated by rock bands having hidden messages in their records.

-At this point in the commentary, Ariel Hirsch chips in, saying that in the end, “Dipper wasn’t thinking about Wendy.”  Jason Ritter (Dipper himself) agrees, “He’s only thinking about calling out Robbie.”    (told ya’ all x3.  - Editor’s note)

-Alex Hirsch’s quote about the hidden message: “Backward messages can’t control people’s behavior because you can’t understand them!”

-His notes on Stan and Dipper bonding in this episode: “Both would rather believe that there is a huge conspiracy rather than they’re bad with women.”

(Land Before Swine)

-Hirsch says as side-notes that Wendy had a running bet with Grunkle Stan about who would eat the corn-unicorn first (he didn’t bet on Waddles).  Also, he says that Ford has a fear of women because after a bad experience involving someone being freaked out by his six-fingers.

(Gideon Rises)

-Hirsch admits that Gideon’s speech to Dipper is bullcrap.  Dipper has beaten plenty without the aid of the Journal 3, but his insecurities make him believe otherwise.

(Scary-oke)

-Wendy has two cut scenes that are shown in the Special Features disc.  At the beginning of the episodes, she (along with Soos) is interview by the news and she is chided for using the word “Jerkface” on live TV.  She then goes into a huge rant about her “freedom of speech.”  The second shows that Wendy was given the blow-horn by Mabel to be the official hype person of Scary-oke.

(Into the Bunker)

-ITB won an Annie award?!  (Didn’t know that - Editor’s note)

-Hirsch wanted to keep the Dipper/Wendy crush going, but could see that the audience was getting tired of it.  The writers decided to have Wendy become a member of the team and go on adventures, choosing to have Dipper deal with heartbreak sooner than later.

-It was considered to be the third priority for the second season.  (Reveal Author, Revisit Switch in the Woods, and Kill the Crush)

-Speaking of, the Bunker’s staircase was taken from the video game classic, Myst

-The script for “Into the Bunker,” was given to Matt Chapman (of “Homestar Runner”/Strong Bad fame), because all of his GF scripts happen to have heartbreak in them, earning him the nickname, “Shipwrecker.”

-Wendy and Dipper’s movie night/Cold Opening was the very last thing to be added to the episode.  They needed something to tie Dipper’s investment to both the adventure at hand, and the Wendy crush

-In this, Dipper’s confidence grows by defeating Gideon, and when Wendy says she doesn’t need guys, it brings him to turmoil by the impossible and hopeless.

-The symbol room was originally the “Gonna Die” room.

-This episode is in Alex Hirsch’s top 5 GF episodes, because of its darker tone.

-He details:  there are so many good moments in this episode where Dipper is suffering at the hands of this girl that’s so much cooler and so much beyond what he could even understand.

-The GF team knew that this had to be a stand-out episode for Wendy.  We had to spend a lot of time with her, showing that she could hold her own and make a valuable addition to the Mystery Crew.  Hirsch regrets not doing that more.  For this, every time Wendy is added to the team, she’s awesome.

-The most amount of takes in the entire series was the “Dipper crying over dead Wendy” scene.  Hirsch explains that it was a hard thing to sell, and a really vulnerable moment.

-ITB’s ending was one of the hardest endings to write.  The commentary says they rewrote it 5 times to get it right.

-An idea used was “Love is temporary, but friendship is real love?”  (Hell, that’s what I use about 90% of the time - Editor’s note)

-The line “Don’t be itchy.” was added super late to the script.  The team tried to avoid as many cliches as possible.

-The first time the Wendy/Dipper confession scene was watched in animatics, Hirsch and crew felt that it was “too romantic,” like a romcom.

-In the Special Features disc, we see a sneak peak of the deleted scene.  In this, Dipper goes in on a rant of despair, pledging to Wendy that he’ll try to avoid the Gift Shop from now on, and that she’ll never have to talk to him again, before she stops him and tries to calm him (Dude, Dude, it’s okay...)  (Poor baby... - Editor’s note)

-The scene was meant to reflect Alex’s own puberty, which wasn’t romantic, but nightmarish. 

-”It’s meant to be terrifying for Dipper.  His heart is in his throat as he has to have this talk with Wendy.  He’s frozen, waiting for it to pass, and Wendy can see this pain, and she’s doing everything she can to show him, “Nothing’s different.  Everything’s normal.  You’re normal.  These feelings are normal.  I’m a couple years older than you, and I’ve seen this.  I’ve been around the block.  We all go through it.  You’re going to be okay.”

(Kinda wish they went this route instead of the whole “age” thing.  It’s beautiful - Editor’s note)

-It couldn’t be a “will they/won’t they” situation.  The real question was “will they be friends after this?”

-The writers could see a very legitimate path where Wendy is like, “Dude. you’re creeping me out.  Maybe we should take a little time from each other because this is not healthy, etc.”  The fact that she was so beautiful and cool and treats Dipper so well shows that she IS the awesome kind of person that Dipper thinks she is.

(The Golf War)

-A quick note about Dipper and relationships.  Dipper’s normal social fear melts away when he’s around someone he hates so much.  Someone like Pacifica brings out pure sass and rage.   (HA! - Editor’s note)

(Little Gift Shop of Horrors)

-There was a possible story being tossed around where Wendy gets a tattoo and gradually, it overtakes her/she becomes the tattoo herself.  Alex Hirsch loved the idea of a living tattoo, stating that it’d fit with Wendy’s rebellious teen nature, and that she’d learn a lesson at the end of it.

-The writers passed, saying that Wendy is very hard to write for.  When we see her, she’s cool and controlled, and for a short story concept, finding that depth to make it valuable would be difficult.  Plus, they didn’t want to be compared to Moana (or the fact it’s almost exactly like a Goosebumps story? - Editor’s note)

(Society of the Blind Eye)

-Hirsch and the writers loved the Wendy/Mabel scene because there’s not many of them throughout the series.  To them, it was great to show Wendy as the “cool, older sister.”  Hirsch dug Wendy’s complete disregard of boys.  “Don’t worry about them.  Yeah, whatever, they’re a dime a dozen. I’ve had so many boyfriends...”

-The writers discuss what kind of man Wendy would end up with.  “He’d have to be something - some kind of specimen.  She’s so confident and having a good time, comfortable in her own skin; if a guy’s cool, she’ll be “Yeah, I’ll try it out,” and when she’s bored, “Yeah, no thanks,” leaving a bottomless scar inside their heart,” going on to cite Robbie as example.

-Alex Hirsch added the line about Wendy’s being stressed 24/7.  It’s obviously not what she shows the world, and yet, it shows how you can vaguely see it there.  (Tell me about it - Editor’s note)

(Blendin’s Game)

-Alex Hirsch’s view on family:  “Friendship is thicker than water, and family’s something you can create.”

-Hirsch’s further thoughts on shipping:  He tells the writers that it’s meaningless.  He rather ask if they have a compelling story instead.  He doesn’t care about love, saying “Love isn’t the end - it’s a story turn.”

-A member of the writing cast was going to comment on the baby Wendy and Tambry scene, when she was interrupted, and the point is never bought up again.   (Dammit! - Editor’s note)

(Dungeons, Dungeons & More Dungeons)

-Hirsch debated about having a scene where Dipper reveals his real name to Ford.  The consensus said no.  The same happened for “Dipper and Mabel Vs. the Future.”

(The Last Mabelcorn)

-Originally, the episode was going to be a Wendy-eccentric episode involving her family and her relationship with Manly Dan.  On top of that, she was going to gain magical weather powers as well.  The team decided against it, not wanting to be compared to the movie, Frozen, as well finding it hard to balance considering Wendy’s grounded character.

For this, they made it up to her by having Wendy (and her influence) take over the episode after the first third.

(Roadside Attraction)

-The Special Features disc shows an alternate opening that doesn’t showcase a Dipper/Wendy angle at all.  Dipper asks a group of ladies to borrow a quarter and instead, gets beaten up for it.  Mabel and the gang figure from this that Dipper needs help talking to women.

-The whole point of the episode (to Hirsch) is that Dipper gets advice from Stan when Dipper is only trying to move on, while Stan has no idea what he’s doing, stating he is not a role model by any means.  The lesson is not to present false affections and learn to hear other people’s feelings.  “Stan lives alone for a reason!”

(Dipper & Mabel Vs. the Future)

-The Mabel/Wendy scene was created so that if someone as cool as Wendy doesn’t like High School, it immediately changes Mabel’s perspective on the matter.

-One of the Government agents were originally going to offer Dipper an apprenticeship/”advanced learning path,” in due to all of his discoveries and research.

-Hirsch figures that Ford’s speech towards Dipper is similar if not the same that he gave to McGucket.  Ford takes advantage of hero worship - it’s not so much as he needs an apprentice, rather to have someone that’ll do anything he says.  (So where are those people that says Ford doesn’t have a mean streak in him? - Editor’s note)

-Upon Dipper rescuing Ford, Jason Ritter laments on commentary, “If only Wendy could have seen that moment...” to which the room explodes with laughter.

(Weirdmageddon Part 1)

-Hirsch explains: “Wendy is the most grounded character in the series, so in this ungrounded scenario, she is able to make the most of it.  She can handle just about anything.”

-Wendy’s speech to Dipper was struggled with for a while.  It had to be a speech not about Dipper’s self-confidence, but about how he needed Mabel back (which the writers says there’s truth in)

-The live action Wendy and Dipper scene (with Jason Ritter and Linda Cardellini) had lines cut from the final version (Son-of-a-...  Editor’s Note)

-The Gideon/Dipper speech represents the full completion of Dipper’s Wendy arc.  It’s a real-life lesson that Hirsch says many people in real life still don’t get.

(Weirdmageddon 2: Escape from Reality)

-A deleted scene in the Special Features disc expands on the beach scene, where Mabel zaps Dipper, Wendy, and Soos’s ruined clothing into gaudy swimwear (though Wendy has a cute flower in her hair ala Hawaiian).  They go to the beach and Wendy begins to admire the hunky volleyball players, leading to a jealous Dipper.

-Alex Hirsch explains that the fantasies offered in Mabelland aren’t fantasies, they’re easier outs.  Wendy’s is teen rebellion rather than facing reality.  Soos’s is the dad he always wanted.

-With Dipper, what was originally going to be behind the door was Ford and the offer of the apprenticeship.  They would go off on adventures and discoveries, only to stumble upon a now-alone Mabel, growing up in High School, and having a real life.  Hirsch axed the idea, believing that Mabelland, and by extension, Bill Cipher, wouldn’t show the downside of any fantasy, rather Dipper would have to discover it himself.  For this, the writers had to go back to “the Wendy Well.”   (Special note: we at @wendip-week have to use the phrase, “Wendy Well” more often - Editor’s note)

-Earlier versions of the episodes had different “Wendy wants,” including one where we find her writing deep poetry.  The writers go on about her fantasy, saying that it couldn’t be a “perfect guy,” because she’s self-realized.  But at the same time,  they admit that Wendy “exhibits destructive character flaws that she has to get over.”  They add, “She really loves that aimless teen rebellion, that it’s hard to turn down all that chaos.”   (So, why the hell didn’t they make an episode about that?!  And I wanna see Poet Wendy ASAP! - Editor’s note)

(Weirdmageddon 3: Take Back The Falls)

-Alex Hirsch:  “Gravity Falls was always meant to have a bittersweet feeling to it.”

-Weirdmageddon was about giving everyone a hero moment.  Part 1 was Wendy and Dipper’s.  Part 2 was Mabel, and the Mystery team as a whole.  Part 3 was the Stan twins and the town united.

-Jason Ritter marvels at the Wendy and Rumble sequence, noting how all the other characters are fighting  with machines, and yet Wendy is going at it bare-handed.

-Weirdmageddon was approved to be a made-for-TV movie, but Disney demanded another 3 episodes for regular air.  The team declined.

-There was never an official plan for the Zodiac.  It was something the team made as a tease, but after seeing fan response, they knew they had to do something with it.  Linking Wendy with the bag was a last minute decision simply because of the scenes involving her and ice throughout the series.

-A quick note about the original quote of the Llama, versus the final one given by Larry King, “Llamas are dumb, blonde, beautiful, and they spit!”   (BWHAHAHAHAHAHA! - Editor’s note)

-Hirsch is a big believer in visual aid.  The Pines twins changed on the inside, and he wanted something to show that on the outside as well.  Mabel got to keep Waddles, and for that, Dipper received Wendy’s hat, as a symbol of their friendship.

-Rewatching the scene, Jason Ritter says that he believes Dipper never takes off Wendy’s hat, and is too shy to tell anyone its origins.  (”When people ask him, he’s like “Don’t you worry about that...”)

-Alex Hirsch says the switching hats idea came from a storyboarder’s sketch, in which he said, “That feels right.”  (Uh-huh.  Just a sketch... - Editor’s note)

The Wendy’s note scene was meant to be ambiguous about two things.  The first being “Mystery.”  It gave Dipper one last question to ponder in his head.  (Had to do one last tease, eh?  Editor’s note)

-The second was “Endings.”   “Did something just die here?  Are all these things we love really gone?”  HIrsch says not quite.  “Endings are new beginnings.”

A few neat points of interest (non Wendip related)

-Jason Ritter is a HUGE gaming fan, where he was able to name almost all the references in “Fight Fighters.”  He also played and completed the Gravity Falls 3DS game twice (where Alex Hirsch admits he never has...)

-Hidden in the Double Dipper episode, there is a secret commentary track, where Jason swoons over Wendy for part of the episode, only to be interrupted by his clones (including one that had to camp out for “The Legend of Zelda - Breath of the Wild)

And lastly, I want to address the new comic, Lost Legends.  While it didn’t have a hint of Wendip in it:

(sorry, fam, Wendy making a crack about Dipper wearing a skirt doesn’t cut it for me.  And didn’t mean to mooch. @fereality-indy. - I couldn’t find a real scan)

But it does contain two other important pieces of information (besides Mabel getting her just-desserts).

The first is a code that gives the hint, WENDY'S MOM: IN ANOTHER DIMENSION?

Such a thing would explain a ton.  One would guess that Wendy and her family believes that her mother just vanished, meaning she could have abandonment issues.  (and yes, kids, such a thing can affect how people have relationships)

And to add to the tease, there’s a second hint as well in the first story:

(and thank you, GF Team for giving me another canon point to add to the Protector comic by stating the BES still exists!)

But back to the task at hand, we see that the far right vital has Wendy’s mom’s memories.  Is this in conjunction with the above point?  Or its own theory?

Hopefully, this plot point is exploring in the next piece of GF related media.  All I can guess is this, if Wendy’s mom really is stuck in another dimension, the Pines better pray they didn’t have anything to do with it...

The only other interesting thing to note is that at the end of the second story, Wendy makes an comment about “overthrowing the government,” which kinda sounds like the cut scene from “Scary-Oke” mentioned above.  Is it a statement of the politics taught in the Corduroy home, or is it a reflection of current views from Alex Hirsch and the writers?  (It’s fascinating either way, IMHO).

So, with everything said and done, I’ll admit, reader, I’m a bit mixed up, feeling wise.

On one hand, Alex Hirsch himself confirmed a shit-ton of Wendy and Dipper info that makes me feel like:

But at the same time, it seems like one of my favorite parts of the show is the one he could care less about - that it’s an end to a means.  The closest feeling I can relate to is how the Professor in the 2nd TMNT movie inadvertently tells Donatello that he was an accident.

And I get it, the series is based on the dude’s real life, and that includes nearly every aspect of Wendy and Dipper, rather it be good or bad (or as he describes it, mostly bad).  But that’s kinda of why I love it, too, that I can relate to that as well, as I’m sure many of you can.  I can say with full honesty that I’ve been both a “Dipper,” where I’ve followed along with a way-too-cool-for-me-girl like a lost puppy, and I’ve been a “Wendy,” too, in which a small ball of wonder looked up at me like I was a gift from God, and I tried my best not to sour or pervert that, and yet, remain honest.  It is an interesting story, even if it’s not the main story.

Man, he wasn’t kidding when he said “Gravity Falls was about being bittersweet,” eh?  But still, the fact remains: while it wasn’t perfect for ol’ Dipper, at least he wasn’t Patti Mayonnaise-d.

Between the numerous essays and questionnaires I’ve whipped up this summer, I still believe that there is ton of info to be asked and answered, especially involving our non-official favorite duo.  We can only hope that the powers that be may want to wish about that “Wendy Well” one day in the future.  Nothing is ever certain, and with that, I’ll leave you with some of the truest words out there, straight from Dipper Pines himself (and because I can’t find the damned gifs.)

Until next time.

[queenangst]

More Than Friends

by: achievingelysium Summary: A classic, two-part throwback to "mortals-meet" fics. Part one: Annabeth's having a no good, very bad day. Percy swings by to help. Things go about as well as can be expected. Post-TLO, Annabeth's POV. / Part two: Much to his friends' chagrin, Percy tends to show up late to class and flakes out on a meetup, until they meet his elusive girlfriend. Post-HoO, mortal's POV.

Read on AO3 | FFN

Her phone buzzed.

Buzzed, then buzzed again.

Annabeth snarled under her breath, eyeing the teacher whose back was turned to the class, and then snatched the phone from her pocket. Whoever was texting her had better have something important to tell her, or gods help her—

It was Percy.

Despite herself, Annabeth smiled. The annoyance didn't fade—no, from this morning to that stupid brat earlier—she'd just about had it with the day. She'd only come back to school for a week, but already she ached to leave and go back to camp where she belonged.

Percy, 11:14 AM  hows it going babe me and grvoer r headed for the beach

Percy, 11:16 AM  wait grover and i?

You, 11:17 AM  you got it.

Annabeth ducked her head and grinned. She caught Lydia's attention in the seat next to her, her friend's eyes widening almost comically as she leaned over to see.

"You're texting in class?" Lydia hissed.

"Shh," she whispered back, batting Lydia away. Still, the girl was hooked, far too interested in what Annabeth was doing.

There was a noise from the front of the room, and the two of them froze, glancing up.

"False alarm," Lydia whispered as Ms. Martin kept writing on the board.

"You should all be writing this down," Ms. Martin said. "See, this is why you guys aren't doing well. I can only do so much, but if you want to learn, you have to be paying attention in class. It's not as hard as you think it is. Is anybody writing?"

Annabeth gritted her teeth, glaring across the room before looking pointedly at her open notebook. Scrawled on the page were notes, though Annabeth hadn't finished writing down everything. Her dyslexia wasn't helpful, nor was the way Ms. Martin organized her thoughts on the board, completely different from Annabeth's.

There was a general grumbling from the class. Furtive glances were cast around the room.

"Yeah, if only she would teach us," Michael muttered from two seats up. Annabeth and Lydia snorted.

It was no secret that no one in their school liked Ms. Martin. She was a hit-or-miss teacher, and she often berated her students on their less-than-stellar work in her class—even though that had always been a result of her teaching.

"There she goes again," Lydia said, sighing as she jotted down another line.

Annabeth wasn't paying attention, though.

Percy, 11:18 AM soo? good day [IMG _FILE] look at this cool shell grover said the pattern makes it look like its frowning but i don't see it

You, 11:24 AM  tell grover I don't see it either. also today's been awful

Percy, 11:24 AM  what wht why

You, 11:25 AM  ugh Helem got mad at me this morning. Again. *Helen

Percy, 11:25 AM she's too hard on u I thought u 2 were getting better

You, 11:26 AM yeah but last week I took off my necklace so I could go shower she almost threw it away. didn't know what it was

Percy, 11:27 AM she WHAT

You, 11:27 AM I guess it's not totally her fault but she should know by now right not to touch my stuff I hate it when people touch my stuf *stuff and I got really upset about it

Percy, 11:29 AM  u didn't tell me :(( ims orry

You, 11:30 AM its fine now I guess I got it back forgot about it when you called a couple days ago

Percy, 11:31 AM  what were u saying about this morning

You, 11:32 AM  UGH

You, 11:32 AM I came home yesterday [Unsent]

You, 11:32 AM went back yesterday at 2am because I ran into a couple monsters took care of everything but I got a little blood and monster dust on the carpet and in the bathroom was too tired to clean up got yelled at this morning for it

Percy, 11:33 AM ur fine right? ugh it wasn't ur fault

You, 11:34 AM I know she hates monsters and really wants to look out for the boys but she just and earlier I saw this girl talking about this kid in the bathroom and she was so rude I

Percy, 11:35 AM  did u get in trouble

You, 11:35 AM almost did I was about to punch her I was so mad and now I'm in English and I hate English and Martin

Percy, 11:42 AM hey… u have lunch next period i'll swing by with grover and take u out we can get those curly fries u like

Annabeth groaned. It wasn't that she didn't appreciate Percy, but her friends had been pestering her about her boyfriend since she'd gotten back to school.

They were just scraping two months from the war; Annabeth had decided to go back with Percy and Sally's encouragement. She'd missed about a month—school had started late August, but Annabeth had wanted to spend more time with the other campers and with Percy before leaving.

Now Annabeth was currently drowning in work to catch up, but Percy seemed to have managed just fine starting in mid-September. He'd gone back to Goode, surprisingly, and had bounced between home, school, and camp.

They had some kind of parent-teacher conferences this week, or maybe a holiday, which meant Percy had four days of weekend instead of two. It made Annabeth insanely jealous.

Percy, 11:44 AM so what do you say

Percy's text brought her back to the present. Lydia had gotten back to leaning over, but Annabeth blocked her friend's attempt to read the screen, furiously typing back.

You, 11:44 AM no you cant my frien [Unsent]

"Miss Chase. Miss Faris."

Annabeth's fingers froze over the keyboard just as her heart stopped. She fumbled to turn off her phone, looking up to see Ms. Martin with crossed arms.

"Ma'am," she replied, feeling her heart start to pound against her ribs. She cast a frantic look towards Lydia.

Monsters, Titans, fire-breathing Chihuahuas… Annabeth had seen them all. Still, there was something about teachers that sent them to a completely different level.

The class had gone quiet, broken only by Jay.

"Ooooh," he sang quietly, and the class tittered.

"Would you like to share what you're looking at instead of what you should've been learning in class?"

Annabeth ground her teeth together. She needed to text Percy back to tell him not to come, wanted to keep talking to him, wanted desperately to leave the classroom and find something she could break. The anger and annoyance that had hounded her came back; Percy had been cooling it off, but now something had snapped again.

"Learning," she said deliberately. Someone audibly sucked in a breath at her tone.

Ms. Martin arched an eyebrow.

"Indeed, Miss Chase. Something you would know to do if you want to do well in my class."

This was dumb. This was dumb, and Annabeth hated it, hated the way her skin was crawling like spiders were climbing across her front. She hated Ms. Martin with her stupid voice, who'd failed her first assignment even after Annabeth had worked on it for three days straight.

Hated the way the teacher was looking at her, like she was dumb.

"Maybe if you were teaching us something, I'd pay attention," Annabeth said hotly, standing up. Her fists clenched at her side.

The classroom, which had been filling with whispers and murmured conversation, went silent. Lydia couldn't seem to decide if she wanted to gape at Annabeth or cower in her seat with the way Ms. Martin was glaring at them.

Ms. Martin strode forward.

"Phone," she said, holding her hand out. "I want to see you after class."

Annabeth glanced at her phone, shutting it off and handing it over. They stood off for another moment before Annabeth forced herself to slowly sit down.

It wasn't worth it, she reminded herself, but a little part of her whispered that it had. Ms. Martin had turned around, marching back to the front of the classroom. People had erupted into conversation.

"Girl," Lydia exploded once she'd sat down. "Wow. You… wow."

"Shouldn't have done that, should I?" Annabeth grumbled, sliding lower in her seat.

"Maybe," Lydia offered, "but that was the most badass thing I've ever seen. Just wait until lunch. Everyone's going to be all over you."

"Oh, gods," Annabeth said. She covered her hands with her hands for a moment and then lowered them, sending a satisfied grin at her friend. "Well… I guess that was a pretty good line, huh?"

The remaining time in English passed quickly. Ms. Martin went back to lecturing them, occasionally interjecting with a comment about their work ethic as she glared vaguely in Annabeth's direction. Everyone went back to taking notes, but there was a restless energy that lasted until the bell rang.

"Dismissed," Ms. Martin called, and the students surged for the door, yelling over each other and chatting. Lydia shoved her stuff into her bag.

"I'll save you a spot," she told Annabeth. She glanced at Ms. Martin. "Good luck."

Annabeth took her time putting her things away. She wasn't a terribly organized person, but today she made sure everything had a place. While she worked, she reminded herself that she couldn't afford to have Ms. Martin hate her. Any more, and she'd be failing English.

Not to mention phone calls. The minute Helen heard a word about what had gone down, she'd go off on Annabeth. What little relationship they'd been carefully building would come crumbling down. She'd be the unruly, good-for-nothing demigod.

She took a deep breath and forced herself towards Ms. Martin's desk.

"I'll have you remember that I tolerate no disrespect, Annabeth," Ms. Martin said. "I don't like it when any student uses their phone in class, and if you have constructive criticism, I'd like you to bring it up to me in a more helpful way."

Annabeth held her tongue. She could tell Ms. Martin meant it, but it didn't make Annabeth feel any less unhappy.

"I'm… sorry," she said.

Ms. Martin made a noncommittal noise. "Are we on the same page?"

Annabeth glanced at the clock.

"Yes, ma'am."

"If this happens again, Annabeth, I can call your parents." Here, Annabeth's lip curled in distaste. "And I will send you out of class. You know that."

"Yes, ma'am."

Ms. Martin sighed. She tucked a piece of hair behind her ear, and though Annabeth didn't like her one bit, she thought maybe she was starting to understand where the teacher was coming from.

"It won't happen again," Annabeth offered quietly. She wanted to leave and slam the door.

"Be sure of it." Ms. Martin nodded, reaching over to a drawer and handing Annabeth's phone over. "You can go."

Annabeth left without saying goodbye, darting out into the hall and sighing.

"That could've gone better," she muttered, heading towards the cafeteria. She was five minutes late, give or take a few—the lunch line would be packed, and she'd have to wait longer to get food.

Annabeth stopped, suddenly remembering why she'd gotten into trouble in the first place. She checked her phone and found a number of missed texts and a call from Percy.

"Oh, gods."

"Annabeth!" a voice yelled before she could check it.

As she pushed her way towards her friends at the table in the corner, she caught sight of a small crowd. Over the din, she could hear a loud voice chattering away.

"What's Beatrice up to?" Annabeth said, sliding into her spot. Lydia lit up.

"Annabeth! You made it out alive!"

"Lydia told us all about it," Samarth said. He passed her a soda can. "Bought this from the vending machine as a gift, you brave, brave soul."

"Uh, thanks," Annabeth said.

"I still can't believe you said that," Jay crowed. "Did you see the look on her face?"

"What'd she say? Spill."

"It was fine," Annabeth muttered. "So what's all the commotion about?"

"Oh," Lydia said, slamming her water bottle down in excitement. "Queen Bea found a new guy to drool over."

Annabeth wrinkled her nose. "I'm sure."

Beatrice was nice enough, but she reminded Annabeth of Aphrodite kids. Cool, but sometimes overwhelming… and maybe a little too obsessed with getting a boyfriend.

She was pretty forward and could get a little bossy, hence the nickname Queen Bea. Still, the few times she'd seen her outside of being boy-crazy had admittedly impressed Annabeth. She was driven and smart. Med school, if she remembered correctly, though Annabeth never knew if that was her own ambition or if maybe she was fishing for a good-looking doctor in her future. Probably both.

Buzz. Buzz. Buzz. Buzz.

Annabeth yelped, pulling her phone from her pocket.

Buzz.

"It's her boyfriend," Lydia said immediately. The table oohed.

"It's not," Annabeth said, hitting reply. It was Percy.

Percy, 12:21 PM hey its lunch but i don't see u i could use some help um u can probably tell where i am theres kind of a crowd is this normal

"Shit," Annabeth said. No doubt the "new guy to drool over" was Percy.

"Annabeth?" Jay called after her as she crossed the cafeteria. "Woah, wait, did we upset you?"

She shoved through the crowd, and there he was.

"Look, I'm sorry, I'm just here to find someone," Percy was saying. Beatrice was unsurprisingly talking to him, too close for both Percy and Annabeth's liking.

"Well, you found me," Beatrice said. She leaned a little closer. "Wanna go to lunch together?"

"Uh," Percy said. He looked nervous, eyes darting around the group of people surrounding him. There weren't actually that many people, maybe twelve in total, but they were all excitedly chattering about the new guy. With their small school and class size, everybody knew everybody, and anyone remotely new got people excited.

He tried to step away.

"I'm sorry," he said again. "I'm gonna go."

"Hey, wait, what's your name?"

"Percy," he replied. He was starting to get jittery, Riptide appearing in his hands as he twisted the cap like he did when he got nervous. "And I'm looking for—"

Annabeth finally pushed through.

"Looking for me?"

Percy and Beatrice both turned at the sound of her voice.

"Annabeth," Percy said, obviously relieved. She'd been his best friend for years, knew the way he ticked, knew what every look meant. It made her stomach flip when his eyes lit up, his lips lifting in that crooked, troublemaker grin.

He held out his hand, and Annabeth took it.

"Oh my God," she heard distantly. "That's gotta be him. The boyfriend. Samarth, get a picture."

Annabeth wasn't paying attention.

"Hey, Percy," she said, not fighting as he wrapped an arm around her and daring to press his lips to her forehead. She closed her eyes for a moment. "What are you doing here?"

He grinned, eyes crinkling at the corners. "Curly fries, remember? I promised."

"Do you two… know each other?"

Beatrice looked like her dreams were being crushed slightly. Annabeth felt bad, then remembered she'd been flirting with her boyfriend and felt a little better.

Before Annabeth could open her mouth, Percy beat her to the punch. "I'm Annabeth's boyfriend."

It was a little silly, but it made her smile. Every time she got to call him her boyfriend, it sent warmth through her body.

Annabeth ducked her head to hide her blush, and Percy tightened his arm around her.

"Oh," Beatrice said. "Um. Sorry."

Now she was blushing, looking a little embarrassed.

"It's cool, I guess. Flattering, but I'm taken," Percy said. "Uh, sorry?"

Annabeth couldn't help but roll her eyes. Her friends took the moment to press in like predators hunting prey.

"So you're Annabeth's boyfriend," Lydia said triumphantly. She was grinning as she stuck a hand out. "Nice to meet you."

"That's Lydia," Annabeth said, sighing. They'd never let her get the end of it. "Samarth and Jay over there."

"Oh, man," Jay said. "Liv is going to be so mad she missed this. Uh, nice to meet you, man."

Percy shook hands with Jay, then Lydia, then Samarth.

"I guess Annabeth talks about me, huh?"

"Oh, she never shuts up," Lydia said. Annabeth kicked at her ankles.

"Lydia!"

"Really?" Percy asked, grinning. He slipped his arm down from around her shoulders, grabbing her hand instead. Her face burned.

"No," she grumbled.

"Kind of," Samarth said. "I think Lydia talks more than her, though."

"What? I'm interested."

There was a beat of awkward silence before Lydia blurted, "How'd you guys meet?"

"Oh, um," Percy said. "We met when we were twelve. Went to the same camp, and we got looped into some of the same, er, camp activities together."

"Arts and crafts?"

Percy was grinning again, and it was infectious. "Something like that."

"Cool," Jay said. "I got shipped off to summer camp a few times, too, but my summers were never quite as exciting as Annabeth's. Any way I can get in?"

Annabeth pursed her lips. "It's one of those you gotta apply at, but it's a little hard to get in. Pretty specific requirements."

Percy laughed. "You're not wrong."

"Guess I'm not going."

Percy shrugged and raised an eyebrow. "Maybe. You never know."

"You're from New York, right?"

"Yeah, but I'm on break, so me and another friend came down for a visit. Then Annabeth said she was having a bad day, so I thought I'd come pick her up to get some food."

Jay poked Samarth. "Why don't you ever do that for me?"

Samarth only squinted back. "You're the one who can drive."

Percy glanced over at Annabeth, and she squeezed his hand.

"Missed you," she said quietly, stepping closer. "It's been weird being here."

"Hey, San Fran's pretty nice."

She looked away. "You know what I mean, Percy. I don't get to see your stupid face around."

He leaned their shoulders together. "Missed you, too."

Percy turned to the rest of the group. "It was nice meeting you guys, but I think we gotta go. Fries don't buy themselves."

There was a chorus of "You, too"s as Percy led Annabeth away.

"Mortals, huh," Percy said. "Cool bunch. Though I'm interested in what you've had to say about me, Wise Girl."

She shoved him. "Come on. Let's get some fries."

[fuckyeahgravityfalls]

Q&A Transcript with Alex Hirsch at MomoCon 2017

Question: Before you decided to make Bill the main bad guy, did you have another character in mind that would have been the villain? 

Alex: Yeah, um that's a good question. Uh, so, when we came up with the villain of the show, I knew that... I knew that Bill was involved. And I knew that Ford had disappeared due to some deal gone wrong with some villain next to the mystery of how Gravity Falls was all assembled. 

Um, but, I didn't yet decide that Bill was that character in the very beginning, y'know? I had always imagined it was some sort of evil character somewhere kinda hidden in the woods. I wasn't sure I could go with the Bill idea cuz I thought it would be too much like Twin Peaks, but as we got further along the series we discussed it among the repairs and we were like, 'none of our other villain ideas were as good.' Bill, Bill was weirder than anything else we thought of. Um, I remember there were other ideas. Strange monsters and government officials; some kind of cthulhu-- some weird crazy old man. But nothing was ever better than Bill, so it ended up sticking. Probably somewhere around, y'know, season one-- midway through season one, we started thinking we might be-- might be on point.

Q: Was Grunkle Stan ever aware of McGucket’s connection to his brother? 

 A: Oh, oh that's such a good question. Wait, let me think about that for a second... Uh... lemme see... I don't think so. I don't think Stan was ever aware of McGucket's connection to his brother. Because, by the time Stan traded identities with Ford, uh... McGucket had already gone off the deep end-- Was already y'know, had already created the Society of the Blind Eye; had already lost his own memory. So Stan would've really only known McGucket as a local obnoxious fisherman. 

And McGucket, probably somewhere deep in the back of his mind, was eerily just drawn to Stan in a way he just couldn't put his finger on, because he thought maybe he knew him, but-- I don't-- I think Stan was ignorant of that. Um, I think Stan... I think Stan looking through the journals probably should've put two and two together, but Stan's not the best at book-learnin'. Uh, so... my guess is Stan wouldn't have known despite that uh, that there's a lot of tumblr art out there showing them as like the Scooby-Doo gang. I don't think Stan ever really knew McGucket before.

Q: What episode do you believe came out the strongest and the most well rounded overall? And is it the same as your personal favorite episode?

 A: Oh gosh. Um. That's a great question. Hmm... I probably feel, personally, that the strongest episode is uh, "Not What He Seems" just because it's such a dramatic episode. Like, we know-- We've never had an episode that dramatic. But, when we first pitched it to Disney executives... they thought it was bad. [laughs] Um, Because it didn't have a lot of jokes in it? Like, I remember normally when we're pitching our episode, executives can usually gauge how good they are by how much people laugh. People didn't really laugh for that one, because it's really tense. So we thought, maybe we'd screwed up. But, when the animation came back we were like, 'Oh! It's GOOD that it's tense. Like, it worked!' Um, So, I dunno if that's my favorite episode, but I think-- that's the episode we should've won an Emmy for, and I'm still pissed we didn't. [laughs]

In terms of favorite episode, like... I dunno. I think the first episode that I really felt that the show was really starting to feel the way I wanted it to-- "Time Traveler's Pig" in season one. Like, that was an episode where Dipper had an interesting story, and Mabel had an interesting story, and uh, felt nostalgic, and based around the summer, and had a big secret callback to even previous episodes, so-- I just remember when we first just got that episode back in color, I was like, 'hey I think maybe I like how I'm making this cartoon show,' so I think that has a particularly fond place in my heart, y'know.

Q: Is Disney bringing you to SDCC or NYCC later this year to promote the journal and other books coming out? 

 A: Right, um, yeah, Disney-- Disney... Disney-general and me, have like-- we're divorced. Like, they kept the house, and the pets. Y'know what I mean? It's... we don't like get dinner or anything. But, the Disney Publishing department, separate from Disney Television, they're really cool, and enthusiastic, and energized. And they wanna make new cool stuff. Um, so I think it's possible I might be at D23 this year, and it's possible I might be at Comic Con, but I don't have anything confirmed yet.

Q: In the scene where Bill is trying to convince Ford to join him in the Fearamid, were there any other jokes or story beats that were considered? 

 A: Which episode specifically are you talking about? [Q: The We'll Meet Again scene.] Yea yea yea, We had a-- Every scene that you've ever seen in the show has a ton of ton of stuff we've thought of and had to cut for time or other reasons. Um, I remember there was definitely a version of that where Bill was a lot trickier. Like, he sort of more successfully lied to Ford about like: 'We're actually going to make the world a better place. Though I present myself as this chaos lunatic that's just my personality.' Like, 'here's ways in which we'll IMPROVE the universe.' 

Um, but it felt out of character. We thought it was much more like Bill to just draw smiley faces in oceans and eat the sun and just-- hope, that the force of his charisma could convince Ford that that was a good idea. But uh, I feel like-- I feel like Bill can be really really tricky when he wants to, but by the time Weirdmageddon showed up he's so impatient, and he's so convinced that he won, that he was no longer like, this brilliant chess master he used to be. He's like, 'alright let's do it! Do what I want or I'll eat your face.' Like, no more-- No more, like-- He wasn't as smart a tactician as he used to be, y'know?

Q: Was "We'll Meet Again" always the song you were going to use? 

A: Oh yeah, it had to be that. It was like... I think I'd just seen Dr. Strangelove recently around that time and it stuck in my head. It seems to me, if Bill has a taste in music, it would be, like, old timey music that ranges from either weird to obnoxious to obscure. 

Uh, Disney wanted me to cut it cuz it cost them a bunch of money to get the rights, even though it's so old, it still cost them money to get the rights. And I just... said, please. Over and over and over again. I would send an e-mail that just said, 'please.' And send another e-mail that said, 'please.' And I would send another e-mail that said-- Yeah. [laughs] Eventually I wore them down that they're like, 'alright we'll spend thousands of dollars.' [laughs]

Q: Are real comics coming? 

 A: You want comics? Would you read Gravity Falls comics? [Audience screams] [Alex leans his ear forward] [AUDIENCE SCREAMS]

A: It's a terrifying noise isn't it, Michael? I was at a... Gravity Falls gallery, and like, they didn't tell us how many people would show up, and it was like, THAT noise echoing from every corner. And uh like, I think I lost a year of my life. My hair started going gray, and it was like, 'oh my god, this is too much love! It's terrifying.' 

Comics. I would love to do Gravity Falls comics. Um, I have so many... One of the tough things about a half hour show like Gravity Falls is every now and then we think of an idea that we really liked, but it was too short for a half hour; 'oh that's only five minutes of story'-- Or it's too specific and weird. And so I have tons and tons of ideas of the show that y'know we'd like to explore this character, we'd like to show this secret, this storyline. So, I'd love to do comics. But, that's up to Disney Publishing, and I'm trying to convince them. So, hopefully, I'll have something exciting to announce in not too long.

Q&A with Stan and Soos

Q: Is Dipper adorable or manly?  

Stan: Dipper smells like baby wipes. Even if I cut off all my shoulder hair, and taped it to him, he wouldn't be 1/10th as manly I am.

Q: What would you do if Mabel told you she had a date to prom? 

Stan: I would... invite the gentleman over, have some coffee, tie him to a chair and interrogate him for 10 hours, and maybe throw him in the pit. [shrug] Hands off my neice, kid!

Q: What would happen if Soos met Giffany again? 

Soos: Oh yea, I recently downloaded this couple's therapy sim? Uh, I think she and I would have to talk about our issues and pass around a conversation pillow, and really work out these struggles. Cuz she's got some problems, dude.

Q: Soos, why are you so perfect? 

Soos: Yeah, uh, my grandma said that a whole bunch of doves flew down and formed the shape of a perfect angel over my crib. I dunno, dude I guess I was just born that way.

[welp-here-i-write]

Wickling Shenanigans Chapter 2 ~ Firsts

It’s today! Holy shit I can’t believe it! Teddy texted me like ten minutes after he dropped me off, inquiring as to whether or not I would be interested in going to a local comic store that he’s been going to for ages.I’m so excited! It took us a solid hour to plan out our schedules so that neither of us would get into too much trouble with our parents (or, in my case, make my parents suspicious). So, we decided on the Wednesday two weeks from then at 6, which would be a comic release day. Fresh comics would be arriving at the store and everyone would go to read something, buy it and then sit down and just debate anything and everything. There’s only one problem. I’m not too positive on how I feel about going to a different store.

I don’t feel like I’m ‘betraying’ my local store or anything, in fact I don’t even have a local store. It’s just anxiety I guess. I mean, I’m already going to be with Teddy, who I’ve still technically only known for seven hours or so, but I’m also going to be in a different area of town, different people who may not react to well and who knows what else. Just this once I want to be confident. I want to be able to just relax and go out on a date with a cute, nerdy boy.

Alas, anxiety never listens to reason anyway. So now the harder question. What the hell am I going to wear? I normally just wear my hoodie and a pair of jeans, but is that really good enough for a date? It is only to a comic shop and by no means is it formal, but I don’t want to disrespect or act like an idiot in front of Teddy. I begin to look through all of my clean clothes, looking for anything that doesn’t look stupid or too casual. No solid colour shirts, that would ruin the comic vibe. So maybe a proper hero shirt? He said that he likes Captain America… right? God, if this works out at all, I’m really going to be a sucky boyfriend. I look for any Captain America merchandise I may have and find… nothing. I do find an Avengers shirt, however, and quickly decide that it’s my best bet.

Finding a loose, yet nice looking pair of jeans to go along with the outfit, I put any finishing touches together and try to fix myself up. Trying to shower as quickly as possible, I hurry through and out, starting on my hair as soon as I can at least mildly dry the rest of my body. It takes five minutes of fumbling through drawers for combs and a hair gel that doesn’t look fake as shit for me to finally begin on hair. I try to do anything that would make it the same nice sideways part that it was when he last saw me, yet I can’t manage it in the slightest. I throw the comb down in frustration some time later, collapsing to the porcelain tiles of the bathroom.

“Why can’t you just get one fucking thing right? You fucking idiot.” I whisper, head in hands, tears welling up in my eyes.

“Maybe you shouldn’t even waste his time. Just cancel. You said it yourself, you aren’t going to be of any use to him, merely a sucky boyfriend.” The small, nagging voice from within my head coos. A voice I’ve come to accept as a part of me, yes, but also a dark thing that I can’t tolerate. The voice of my depression and anxiety all rolled into one. And no matter what I tell myself, I can’t help but feel like that tiny voice is right.

Gingerly, I reach for the phone that I had left on the counter, readying my excuse in my head. There goes another one, I suppose. As I absentmindedly go to the text thread between me and Teddy, I notice that a new text is there.

“Hey, um, I don’t exactly know what you may want from this date or anything, and honestly, I’m really scared to fuck this up. I just wanted to ask if it was ok if we didn’t try and overdo this or anything. I know that this may turn you away, but I just want to make sure I don’t overstep at all or… I don’t even know. I’m sorry. Anxiety is weird. Anyway, I hope that you’re still cool with Jansen’s at 6?”

I can’t stop the tears from pouring out. He is so amazing. He knows exactly what it’s like and is actually confident enough to talk about it. He is everything that I’m not and may never be. I text back, slowly weighing each of my words so that I don’t make a stupid mistake.

“Yeah! Of course. I actually understand exactly what you’re talking about. I was going to do something really brash and ignorant, but you stopped me. I also have anxiety, fun fact, I guess. But yeah, I can’t wait to see you there.” After sending the text I look at the time. 5:00. And Jensen’s is 20 minutes away. Damnit. I sigh, looking at my hair with resignation. No need for false images. I wash out the gel and just simply run a comb through it again. It’s messy, but not in a bad way. I quickly change into the outfit I chose earlier, but after a moment of pause decide to throw on that familiar gray hoodie.

I grab my wallet and keys to the house, saying goodbye to my younger brothers and telling my parents that “Daniel”, my “lab partner”, wanted to meet up for a study session. They accepted it, readily agreeing to any sort of studious activity, and gave me money for the cab ride. As I walk outside into the cold, fall New York air, I search for a taxi, finally hailing one down. I give my destination and soon enough, we reach the comic shop, where I thank the woman and hand her an extra five dollars for getting me here in 15 minutes. I look at the store sign above the door and the extraordinary combination of merchandise, comics and apparel that line the walls and center of the store. Taking a deep breath and trying to steady myself, I walk into the door.

As I walk in, the familiar and comforting scent of fresh comics and posters hit my nose. It feels like a second home by now, and every comic shop has a similar enough smell to feel that way, yet a small difference to make themselves unique. I also hear a surprising lack of conversation when I enter the store, surprised that there are no raging debates on whether the Hulk or the Thing would win in a fight. I look around the small store, obtaining a greeting from the main cashier and obvious manager, but only finding a few others.

Finally, I find a small outcropping filled with comfortable chairs and  group of six people all silently reading issues of the new Scarlet Witch that I had been super excited to get tonight. One of them, a guy probably in his late twenties, with brown, wavy hair and a small stubble, looks up to me. “Oh hey!” He says in a quiet tone. “You here for the Scarlet Witch discussion?”

I look at him with vague confusion. “Um, no, I was invited here by someone I met. He should be here soo-”

“Ah! You’re the guy Teddy won’t shut up about! What is it, Billy, Dilly? I’m sorry, I’m shit with names.” He interrupts, quickly smiling at me after his apparent fumble.

“Yeah, my name’s Billy, nice to meet you.”

“Trent, nice to meet you.” He puts his hand forward and I readily accept it. At least I have one guy who I can now relate to. I continue with a simple train of thought before a question hits my mind.

“Hey, Trent. Did you say ‘the Scarlet Witch discussion’?” I inquire, suddenly reminded of the short phrase he said earlier.

“Yeah! To honour her new comic, we decided that she would be a great subject for this week’s discussion!” Trent’s explanation is then cut off by the sound of yet another voice, this one from behind me and much more familiar.

“Damnit!” Teddy whines, looking slightly red-faced with embarrassment. “It was supposed to be a surprise! I remembered that you said that you loved Scarlet Witch and when I was here later I was reminded about the fact that the discussion was today and I thought immediately that you would love to talk about her and the new issue, which I also bought for you so here.” He says in one rapid sentence, his face growing ever-more cherry as he continues. After the last phrase, he looks through his bag before pulling out a very nice looking Scarlet Witch #9.

At that moment I realize two things. I am the shittiest boyfriend of all time. And. Teddy Altman is the best and most thoughtful boyfriend ever. I accept the comic, silent and slightly open-mouthed. I can’t help but just stare, words failing me. Finally, Teddy speaks up again.

“It’s not what you would’ve preferred is it? I overstepped didn’t I? God damnit I’m sorry Billy, I thought you would like it and clearly I was wrong. Do you want me to take it back? It’ll save you the trouble.” Teddy says. Finally, words connect to my brain again just as he is about to reach and grab the book.

“No! Oh my God Teddy, no one has even done that or anything even remotely similar for me. Holy shit, it’s amazing. I was going to buy one tonight, but… wow. Just… wow. Thank you so much.” I continue to stammer, trying to talk to him, when he leans in and simply hugs me. It’s a nice way to say shut up.

“Hey, it’s ok. So you weren’t horribly disappointed by the present?” He asks, concern still fresh in his face.

“Damnit Teddy, I love it and I can’t wait to talk to everyone here about the obviously greatest person. Well, besides you. Thank you.”

“Yeah, of course. You deserve it. You’re outstanding.” He says, eyes watery and still concerned. I got so lucky to find him. For the next few minutes I begin to flip through the pages of the comic, reveling in the art style that had been revolutionary back in Scarlet Witch #1 and still were just gorgeous. The story was excellently unfolding and about 5/7 of the way through, a large plot twist came into play and made the story exponentially larger, more complex and just flat out better. An hour has passed by the time I finally finish it.

We stay another few hours and discuss how the new arc seems to be coming into play with everyone else, Teddy showing off his new knowledge that he had been working on apparently. And despite my enjoyment of everything and Teddy’s kindness, I can’t help but feel like something is wrong. When we both step outside into the cold, night air, I turn to him.

“This isn’t your thing, is it? Scarlet Witch and everything else that was discussed tonight?” Teddy’s face falls as he looks at me.

“Was it that obvious? I’m just not that big on Scarlet Witch, I mean, I tried but I’m not sure what it is. I just couldn’t get behind it.” His voice cracks a bit and he looks almost as crestfallen as I am that he wasn’t honest with me.

“Not really, I guess I just picked up on it. You know I don’t care right? I completely understand. What kind of geek could I call myself if I were to shame someone for their preferences? That’s the whole job of being a geek!” I say, incredulously. I can’t understand why he wouldn’t be able to just tell me the truth.

“Yeah, I guess. I’m sorry. I guess I thoroughly ruined your night. Goodnight Billy.” He turns away and begins walking. My heart stops for a second. While I am typically ok with letting go of a boy, suddenly everything in me just screams out. And I know that I can’t let him get away. So I run after him.

“Teddy! Wait! No! Come back, please!” I continue running after him, eyes watering. Never before have I felt so strongly about someone. He turns around as I finally catch up and grab his arm. There are tears in his eyes as well. “Please don’t go. I’ve never felt like this before for anyone and the last thing I want to do is ruin this because you really are someone special that no one should ever let go and I just ----”

I’m cut off by a sudden pressure on my lips as Teddy leans forward and silences me. And there are no fireworks, no loud explosions. In fact quite the opposite. Everything just short circuits in my head and my legs soon turn to jelly. I would fall if not for his arms around my waist. His lips are soft or something I’m not quite sure. All I know is that Teddy Altman is kissing me. His hair lightly brushes against my face and his breath smells like strawberry milkshakes. Yet the kiss is so much shorter than I wanted it to be. Pressure and then a slight brush and pull away. He stands there with his forehead against mine, our breath vapour mixing in front of us. He smiles a small, sad smile.

“Sorry, I didn’t even ask. But I’ve kinda wanted to do that for a while. You just… you’re kinda amazing and really attractive and super swe-” It’s my turn to stop him. I lean up and forward again, kissing him with just a little more fervor than before. He responds by pressing into it and returning with his own slight fervor. Finally, we pull away again.

“Guess we’re even then.” I say with a small wink. He gives a small chuckle.

“Damn Billy, I don’t even know what to say. You’re amazing. And God, I am so fucking sorry.” He whispers, arms wrapping around me even tighter.

“Don’t be sorry. You just gave me my first kiss. And there’s no one I would rather give that too. Just promise that we can do something that you love next time.” His eyes widen at that.

“Wait, you-you’re still ok with being with me, even after everything else?” He says.

“God, you are so thick Teddy. Why else would I willingly kiss you? Why would I ask? Just to fuck with you? No! You’re amazing and sweet. How many times do I have to say it? You’ve said it to me and yet won’t accept the reciprocation. Deal with it. You’re stuck with me, Theodore.” I smile, backing up with my hands firmly placed on my hips. He returns the smile, significantly more happy.

After we discuss it for a few minutes, we decide to just relax at his place next week after school. And if it’s anything like the first, I can’t wait for my second date.

[theconfusedmaiden]

The EXO’rDium in Manila Day 2

After 1 year and 1 month, the kings are back in Manila!! Exo’rDium in Manila! The boys are back with 2 nights concert. Dated February 25, 2017 for the first day and February 26, 2017 for the second day. It was held at the Araneta Coliseum in Cubao. And guess who's freaking excited? Phixo!! Me!! EVERYBODY!!

Last year, I was in the Lowerbox B, day 2. This year, after so much "Kakuripotan" and “Iponing”,(Thank you 13th month and freelancer.ph!) I was able to purchase the VIP Seated Ticket! Costy? Yes! A LOT! But that was just some of the things that I did for them, even I can't believe it.

And so the nights of the concert came! Sadly, as in SUPER SAD AND FRUSTRATING, Zhang Yixing/Lay won't be able to attend the concerts again. It really broke my poor fangirl heart. I thought that I'll be able to see my love this time but no. Reason, the producer said it's because of his other commitments. Just goes to show how hard working my baby is! However, my guess would be because of some 'politics'. One thing is for sure, It's not his fault! Stop blaming him guys! Let's just wait for the right time that we'll be able to witness his handsomeness in person.

Going back to the concert. I really tried my best not to spazz what's happening from day 1. I promised not to open twitter but then again, I failed. hehe I really got hyped with all those videos uploaded. Guess what, the morning of Feb 26, 2017 my mom saw me smiling right after I woke up. I did it unconsciously. hehehe

My friend whom I met at last year's concert, Raine, also came with me this time. Due to traffic and slow walking people, it's already 4:30 when I got in the venue. Raine, got there first. When we got inside, the coliseum is almost full already! And the stage is sooooo much closer than I thought!! *But my phone camera make it seem like its far. Sorry. hehehe

The concert started at exactly 5:30 pm. I sooo love the opening VCR!! They crowd got soo hyped up!! The opening VCR seemed like it lasted for 10 mins. It's soo cool. I got the "W" feeling after I saw the comic book effects on the video.

And so the concert began!! Wooooohhh!! It's only the first song but I already got tired. I shouted as much as my lungs can take! It's not just me but everyone inside. I couldn't even hear their voices because of the screams!

I didn't get to take a picture of the very first part because I forgot to when I saw them. I don't know what to do first, to capture the moment or to watch the moment. The result:

SAARRREEEHHHH!!

When I finally got to see them clearly, I automatically counted the members present. I know. I know. I just wish that Lay would surprise us that night. Whatever!

The first set of songs include the remix versions of MAMA, Monster and WOLF. I love the remix versions especially the monster because of Baekhyun’s solo dance! PH EXO-Ls cheered for him all through out that part! (Byun Baekhyun!!  Byun Baekhyun!! Byun Baekhyun!!)

Here are some of the shots I took from the first set of songs. I didn’t took a lot because I’m busy fangirling. hahaha

MENT TIME!! As usual, the screams were sooooooo freaking loud!! The members introduced themselves in english. It was so fun hearing them speak in english. They were all so excited with the concert! Chen and Kai looked so hot because of their sweat. They were all so hot nowadays!!

However, Baekhyun saw some fans got injured on the standing side. He said on his ment that when another fan got injured, they'll stop the concert. NO!! They asked everyone in the standing area to take a step backwards. Thankfully, they followed them nicely and they didn't need to ask them again.

When it's Suho's time to speak,  he was working so hard to finish his ment in english and in the middle of his speech, he paused for a short time. The crowd cheered for him louder! He's so cute! He even took a bow after the screams.

Now it's the second set of songs!! The sexy songs! LOL. They were supposed to have a rain on stage but they didn't push it through, maybe because of the space. The second stage includes White Noise, Thunder, Playboy and the most anticipated Artificial Love! But the stage is still full of their sexy body waves and godly voices.

Here are some snaps!

Kai needs to stop winking and doing a finger heart while he’s covered with sweat. It’s a fangirl’s death!

BUT! Here's the highlight of the second set of songs. The Artificial Love crane Dance!! Woop Woop!! I managed to take a video of Baekhyun in this dance. Here it is:

Sorry for my voice. As you can hear all I got to say is ‘Oh My god’! hihihi Don't need any explanation.

VCR TIME!

I couldn't forget this VCR! It's because the very first frame is Lay's face! He's so cute! He's so handsome! He's such a boyfriend material! I love seeing them having fun by themselves. I wish they also have a time to party like that by themselves. Just having a lot of fun together.

The sang Unfair with this cute stage set up.

They are wearing all white and their skin is so white so the result from my camera:

Jamming Time! Chanyeol is in charge of the guitar. That curly haired giant was so hyper playing with his guitar that Suho needs to stop him for them to start. Cute! The first song they sang is the good old Hawak Kamay by Yeng Constantino. After a few lines, Suho reminisced the time when they forst sing this song. It was 4 years ago from the DKFC concert. Just about their debut year. They promised to sing a new Filipino Song when they come back next year.

Chanyeol played the acoustic versions of their songs (My Lady, My Turn to Cry, Moonlight, Call Me Baby, Love,Love,Love and Lady Luck) and just like the whole time, PH Exo-Ls sang along with them. I don't care if I got the lyrics wrong, as long as there is melody. HAHAHA! They even let us sing some parts alone. Here are some of the snaps.

They sang What If during this part (but I’m not pretty much sure).

When they were singing, the background shows their serious faces. I didn't forget to take a photo of Lay with the rest of the members. I take a photo everytime he appears on screen.

Here are some of the snaps of the next stages which includes Tender Love and Love Me Right.

The Vocal Line, D.O., Chen, Baekhyun and Suho were left to sing in the middle of the stage.  They sang One and Only and Stronger.

Chen's voice is so lovely. He's slowly climbing up on my already ruined bias list. My heart still flatters when I hear them sing live. It's surreal.

Fun Time! Haha. The VCR for their next stage is adorable. The VCR where their heads were huge. All of them are so cute that I wanted to make them into a keychain. Hahaha But D.O. role is the cutest. He's a sleepy head!

Here’s some pics of them with their cutie cutie costumes.

Cutie little Baekhyun dropped his little red hat. 

I didn’t get to take too much picture with this stage because this was the time when I stared at their faces one by one. They all look like an angel. Especially Chanyeol, who all throughout this stage is so hyper! He keeps on shuffling and running around each member. I wonder how can they be so cute and handsome and hot, all at the same time. 

For the next VCR, the first frame showed ChanBaek riding a motorcycle going to the stadium. While the other members are preparing for the concert. I remember a shot of Lay while sleeping, Kai while having his hair blow dried and the beagle line being beagles. 

I thought that all they’ll do for the whole VCR but hey! There’s more! The VCR prepared by the Dance Line! (Kai, Sehun, Lay). I didn’t got to take a full video because I wasn’t prepared. Here’s some part from the VCR. I started capturing on Lay’s part. I remember this performance during one of the awards night last 2016. 

After that, the next set of stages are the, as I call it, “Handsome Stages”. All their stages for their songs like Overdose, Transformer and Lightsaber! Here are some snaps:

I managed to take a video for the last part of their performance for Lightsaber. 

Time for their ment! And this ment is the longest! The only members left were Suho, Chen, Kai and D.O. Chanyeol, Xiumin, Baekhyun and Sehun went backstage to change costumes. They were all wearing just plain black shirt in which they all look hot. (like all the time)

This time, Suho revealed that a lot of them were injured from the first day of concert. He said it was a secret but he also said that they were all healed by how much crazy(in a good way) PH fans are. 

Here are some tiny bits that I remember from what they said. D.O. said that he discovered new Filipino food that he likes, ‘Lechon Manok’. He said he didn’t have a chance to taste the pork but he will the next time they come back. Suho also enumearte which places in the PH he wants to visit and it includes Boracay etc. (haha can’t remember). He also asked Kai about what places in the PH he thinks is popular and guess what Jongin said. “Yeogiyo” (This place) (this place is now the most popular).

The leader-nim noticed the fanproject a while ago and he asked for a sample banner. He asked some fans on the standing area for a copy. Like what happened last concert, he held it up and showed it to the members. He also asked us what does the alibata written means. Even though they can’t understand what we’re saying (Imagine thousand of fans explaining at the same time, how would you understand a thing?). They just concluded that it means I Love You. Which is quite right because the alibata written in it is “Iniirog Kita, Bes”.

This time, Baekhyun, Chanyeol Xiumin and Sehun were left on stage while the other went backstage. Baekhyun kept on talking about how crazy PH EXO-Ls are. He once again asked us to stomp our feet and so the whole coliseum sounded like a whole battalion running from somewhere. They were amazed about how passionate we are. 

The fans chanted “PHIXO” after that. We are expecting for him to remember us from the concert last year. He named us “PHIXO” last concert after seeing some fans dance from the standing area. Again, they didn’t got to understand what we’re saying. Gladly, after several minutes of chanting, Baekhyun finally understood. “Ahh, Phixo! Philippine EXO!” Finally guys! Finally!!

Now it’s time to party!! Sehun, Xiumin and Chanyeol thought us on how we’ll respond with their next song. “Katchi Katchi Hae!” (Do It Together). 

Chanyeol asked us to stand up and just get crazy! You know it’s about to get really crazy! The song is not yet commercially released and it’s just exclusive for the EXO’rDium Concerts! It’s just like Drop That but with a different feels! The Rap Line nailed it! Everybody was on their feet, jumping cheering and getting crazy!

After that Chanyeol had his solo stage with his Electric Guitar skills! 

Soon after, the members went out to party with us! Chen, why do you have to show up wearing a muscle tee? Don’t you know how much hot you are with your biceps?! But thank you for showing it, though. 

LET’S PARTY!! The fans partied with their songs like Full Moon, Drop That, Let Out The Beast, Lucky and Remix version of Run. Imagine partying with the boys! It’s really unforgettable and we didn’t even feel tired after all! 

We finally got time to relax for a bit when they went off stage. It was also several minutes and we seemed to miss them already. We started chanting “E-X-O!”

It’s now the ENCORE STAGE which means the concert is about to end. NO!!! The boys came back wearing their white baseball jersey shirts! They sang Cloud 9, Growl and Lucky one! 

I love seeing them goof around while playing with the toys on stage. The one that caught their attention is the moving puppy stuffed toy. Xiumin even played with it while performing. Chen placed it on the side when they were going to dance.

They’re in the middle of their performance but see how Chen and Xiumin look at the little moving puppy.

And here you can see Baekhyun lying on stage. In which Chanyeol also did after their Tender Love stage.

For these songs, they were just roaming around the stage to get close and wave to the fans. The fans threw some stuffed toys on stage and the stage became messy! Hahaha For Lucky One here’s a video a Suho getting all hyped up dancing alone! Our funny Leader everyone. And you can also see how ChanBaek danced together at the back.

Here’s how they ended their stage for Lucky one. One of my favorite pictures I’ve taken.

Now, time for the last MENT! NOOOOOOOO!!!!

How time flies when you’re having too much fun! All of them said their thanks to us. Suho asked us to anticipate their comeback here next year! YES! YES! YES! Kai said that their 2 day concert in the PH will be unforgettable for him and the members as well. 

Baekhyun said that all of them really got crazy that night. Proof? He just sang “I Believe I can Fly” while wearing a pink butterfly wings and a cute white hat. Chanyeol played so well while wearing an Iron man Mask and he pretended to fly and run around the stage. Suho also said that when all of their fan gather in one place he can easily locate where the PH EXO-Ls are. YEP YEP YEP![Filipino fans are one of the best crowd you’ll ever see in the world! And that’s a fact, even Steve Harvey from the Ms. Universe will agree! Hahaha]

The leadernim really got curious about the banner and he maybe asked the Filipino staff backstage about it and for the last time all of the members shouted “Iniirog Kita, Bes. Manila!” We all got Bes-zoned. hahahahaha

Now it’s really their last stage. They sang Angel for the last time. The members roamed the whole stage waving to every section of the coliseum. The member who’s very diligent about waving at every fan he could is the Maknae, Sehun. I even thought that I got an eye contact with him and Kai.

All throughout the concert, we sang all of their songs, from the very first up to the last one) together with them and they even asked us some time to sing it louder! During the VCRs, we also sang their songs even if it’s just instrumental. Now, tell me how dedicated we are the whole concert! hahaha

Before saying Goodbye, they even asked for a picture together. YES!!!! I finally have a picture with them!! hahahaha (as of writing, they still haven’t uploaded the photo) Here’s how they posed for it from my perspective.

Finally, here’s their last moment on stage:

Yes, it’s me screaming from the background. And again, sorry for my ugly voice. hahaha

I love how Chanyeol screamed “Mahal Ko Kayo!” so long! and As you heard, they promised to come back! Sehun stayed on stage until the screen closed. 

Bye boys!! I already miss you big time!! And don’t worry, I’ll be there with you again, next year! I promise! I love you guys!!

PS. I wrote this as detailed as I could because I want it to be properly documented for my future reading, when I want to reminisce the moments I had with them. 

PPS. All the photos and videos I used are all mine. The pictures are blurred and unfocused, I know, but don’t bash, my phone doesn’t have a good quality camera. 

Sharing with you my edits.

I LOVE YOU GUYS!! 

from your forever fangirl,

-theconfusedmaiden

[nataliedanovelist]

My 2020 Tumblr Top 10

1). 471 notes - Oct 6 2020

I would fucking die for this owl.

2). 303 notes - Feb 9 2020

GF - Dr. Mystery (A gift I did for the amazing @siro-cyll​.)

Ever since the Pines family had returned to Gravity Falls for the summer, Soos and Stan shared the role of Mr. Mystery. It was primarily Soos’ responsibility so that Stan could sit in his boxers for as long as he wanted, but every so often - to give the old man something to do or so Soos could work on a project or a repair - it was like the good ole days with the original My. Mystery scamming tourists and a humble handyman making the shack stand strong.

Unfortunately, Soos caught a bad case of the summer flu, and so to try to keep two old men and two young teenagers from getting sick, he quarantined himself in his room and Stan had to fill in the My. Mystery role. It felt good to be back in his old ways for a bit, amazing gullible tourists with made-up attractions; he had been doing this for thirty years, he could do it for a week, right?

3). 253 notes - Feb 5 2020

GF - Tiger Stripes (Another gift for @siro-cyll​!)

With the soft, warm steam coming from his mug, the pleasant early-morning sun baking his naked chest, and the cool breeze awakening his senses gradually, it would be an understatement to say that Ford was comfortable.

The breeze ruffled his fluffy charcoal-gray hair playfully before disappearing, leaving behind a still Summer’s air. While it is true that he became cold easily, one of the reasons why he wore turtleneck sweaters all year-round, the star his planet revolved around warned his exposed skin pleasantly and Ford felt no anxiety nor unpleasant chill as he stood on the porch, watching the day begin.

4). 240 notes - Sep 8 2020

1 Minute and 4 Seconds of Pain (This was both fun and painful to put together. Credit to everyone in the video who participated.)

5). 197 notes - Feb 14 2020

GF - Sweatertown (... I may or may not have gone overboard back in Feb. Sorry, @siro-cyll​. ^^; )

It was raining that day. Maybe that was why it took Ford awhile to decide that it wasn’t a figment of his imagination he was hearing, or another natural sound the woods would make in this weather. No, no it was definitely crying.

6). 180 notes - Oct 9 2020

GF - Can’t Stand It (Oh gosh, a gift for @ho-ne-ye​ that she AND @sealbatross​ were kind enough to draw for. Thank you so so much guys!)

Stan was having a bad day. Well, a bad week. Scratch that, a bad month.

It was March, a beautiful time out in the Arctic. For several weeks the Stan twins hardly ever saw the sun or didn’t see it at all. Closer to the holidays they traveled down south to Northern Europe, exploring the United Kingdom and the Northern Islands in order to enjoy daylight, but now that Summer was approaching and Spring was on their side, the Stan O’ War II was moving up to sail above Canada, breaking melting ice and meeting new creatures.

7). 163 notes - Mar 18 2020

GF - Boxing (... How does the saying go? What goes around comes around? Do something nice and the world will do something nice in return. Huh. I’m noticing a pattern with all of my top 10s... Anywho! I did this one for @artsymeeshee​!)

It all started back when the Pines family first arrived back at the Mystery Shack. Mabel was up in the storage room (It was much fuller than wise, but the attic was used as a bedroom at the moment.) and had dragged Dipper along with her to help find some old photographs. With only two weeks to work on her special birthday present for her grunkles, she needed all the help she could get in making them the perfect gift: a new scrapbook full of old photos of Glass Shard Beach and pictures Mabel had saved on her phone and was going to print of the old sailors out at sea.

8). 136 notes - Feb 10 2020

GF - Arm Wrestling (ANOTHER gift for @siro-cyll​! Seriously, they’re a gem for tolerating me. XD )

Fiddleford cleared his throat, a feeble attempt to get his colleague’s attention, but to no avail. He sighed and sat cross-legged on the grass, his backpack full of gear by his side. He propped up his head by his chin and on his fist, his elbow on one knee, and he watched half-bored, half-amused, as his best friend arm-wrestled a unicorn.

And no, the author did not mean to put down “harmed, wrestled and mourn”, nor did the composure of this tale mean “alarmed and sworn in”. No, the anomaly-researcher was truly arm-wrestling a unicorn, and had been at it for a few hours now.

9). 127 notes - Oct 27 2020

GF - Amalia (OH MY! @artsymeeshee​ had blessed us so I had decided to give her something in return.)

The snow reflected the tiny amount of sunlight the capital of Iceland received. Spring was coming, though still a ways off, but the large island still welcomed the sun that was starting to rise earlier every day and stay longer as February was coming to a close.

10). 123 notes - Jul 26 2020

GF - Counting Stars (A gift for the wonderful @sealbatross​!)

Original comic belongs to @sealbatross! GUYS, they’re so talented, I luv ‘em! GO SHOW ‘EM SOME LOVE!!! Sorry it’s a little choppy, but the original comic just flows SO WELL! I highly recommend checking the original post. 

[haeroniel-doliet]

i need more money to buy little art

honestly tho feeling like for that ideal goal existence i’ll try get to someday, i’ll needa be making proper money comfortable and good so i can spend all i like on society 6 and other to buy shirts and bags and just everything to a house all in different art prints (mostly florals) bc just those pictures are  like everything i want but just so expensive. i’m trying to sum down like 10 to stickers, bc i wanna do up my laptop, but dedicating to a single decal (thats like 25 ON SALE) is too much esp since i love so much. so ive kinda decided to get a hard cover for the laptop just in case i break it, and just in case i do break my laptop that i can keep the stickers on the hard case and dont lose them to replaced parts. idk seems smart. ill probs buy a kinda shady cover off of ebay for 5 or 6 pound and then spend 20 on stickers for it :] since theyre on sale till 8 am today and its 3 am im probs just gonna settle and order them. might order cover tomorrow w my dad bc i need trust assurance. hes not all on board on the stickers so im just gonna go for it. theyre gonna be like my post cards. i buy so many every place. and no. not trashy postcards. i want art. i have so many postcards of paintings in galleries and so many from comic con art valleys (guess who wants to get so much more and 100% will) i love original art the most when its pretty to me and like everyone who sees it. simples okay but i prefer soft and detailed. excited now i can go to con and also be looking for stickers bc maybe ill get a few cool ones that wont cost me as much as the society 6 ones do. and then my laptop can replicate my walls, displaying all the art ive loved that ive been able to take with me (bc theres so much i obviously dont have on my walls) anyway im looking at these and making some small bc i suddenly realise this laptops got realestate. and the saddest thing w stickers (literally why i had one of those waxy paged sticker books as a child) is that i cant dedicate stickers to a single spot. its so much dedication. what if i buy a bigger sticker and it wont fit? what if i get the perfect sticker for that spot and it wont fit? (over lap i guess) how can i be sure i put them in the right spots to start with? augh i dont really wanna cover just half of it and obviously leave space bc that puts pressure on finding stickers and i might get ones i dont love. i cant get sick of any one bc itll be there  (joy of having multiple mean theres less getting sick of anything). anyway i think im happy w the sizes of these 10 stickers and can work w them (also for now i think im just gonna be going around the edges and leaving the apple logo as it is, esp bc it glows and theres already this shitty old smiley face sticker from my old psych teacher and i kinda dont wanna get rid of it, i just wanna add things around it so it doesnt look so: clean (actually dirty) laptop that a child marked as their own) 

anyway society 6 has random discounts all the time which is p rad and maybe the day im ready to invest in my own living space and dont feel obliged to check w my parents about just about any purchase, i’ll then subscribe to something thatll tell me what discount is on. that in mind, i think i’ll only get the 9 now, that hopefully wont cost too much, and leave a bunch in my wishlist, bc there’ll be another discount (this is 20% off everything)  and maybe that’ll be like 50% off stickers and boy then when my collection is underway you bet ill go for it. and like maxx sticks on their sketch book, if i dedicate to a new book maybe ill get more for that and have a pretty thing to keep and reminisce over (tho knowing me, ill not use it much bc i have a need for pretty things to stay perfect and presentable, and i have a need for everything that i might show to others to be like near perfect otherwise its sucks and ill feel bad bc i dont wanna show it off to people. like my art book, sure i couldve made it all experimental and crap and then edited the real pages together on the computer. but no. i needed everypage to be presentable and pretty and handwritten and creative. and they must go page after page, its so awkward showing someone something and then going “oh wait now these few are empty sorry yeah heres the next page” so i baasically have  a book with mhmmm 20-26 pages of beautiful spreads that im quite proud of inside beautiful covers ( i knew id want to be presenting it for years to come) and the back pages are just...empty. and theyll probably stay that way bc i no longer have projects to be doing to fill them with. maybe one day ill grow into myself and grow out the fear of ruining what ive achieved and fill some with new projects to please myself and be an indepenednt artist not just a teacher pleaser. you know its like that with my work too, like it has to have a direction and a plan that will be achieved, and its terribly frustrating when that vision doesnt happen. but i think thats the same with everyone. 

anyway on a side note, dont you guys think its so fun and cool how ive not done my post labs that were due last friday? how every night ends up being 3-4 am until i go... mhmmmm yeah i guess nothing is happening. like i hope id bloom and do work at that 11pm-3am window and then i get here, suddenly having lost all track and sense of time and just sigh. its wasted, its basically tuesday already. have to keep telling myself dates bc it moves so weird. i planned on getting shit done two days ago. here we are regardless. and the most ill get done is get those stickers ordered bc that is i guess what ive been half focused on for mhmmm5 hrs. then ill save my 7 dollars or whatever, have stickers on the way, tomorrow order the case and thats one insignificant thing done. then the question will be have i looked at summer jobs? no of course not ive looked at ballet courses. shush. i havent showered for days bc theyve just slipped by too laying in bed, maybe tomorrow ill take a shower and pick up all the trash and tissues on the ground. maybe i will. i know i wont get real work done tonight, and already ill be sleepy till 1 pm and by then mom will be again on me abt sleeping to latesoo... yeah no point. and here i thought id make a quick totes relatable short post about how i need more money to buy stickers and maybe a brief my ideal life is to have enough money to spend on art being in every part of my life and all this  being unique so people love coming to my house and go wow its so original and cool. and that turned into a word vent thats so far taken me over half an hour. hi my batterys dying. 

lng story short, i’ll order the stickers currently in my basket after so much though, suck it up and do it and know that i have a bunch over in my wishlist for that next maybe even better sale when it happens. the only thing is im taking all the rest as transparent which for sure dulls them down (yeah white background looks sick but for some its just more classy w transparent, then theres this one bear i’m 100% naming wojtek thats in white bc i feel it’ll be best for him, and i guess having him in white will set that theres no clear rules to follow and worst case if it doesnt fit he can come chill on the keyboard side next to my mouse pad thing) honestly i cant tell if i should be getting them all in white and just hope that theyll look gorgeous no matter what. yikes 3 dollar shipping for stickers, ok itll actually be 19.62 pound and using euro card 22.50 in  euros.... am i dumb? maybe. and tho im supposed to be saving money up so i have some, i also did get birthday money sorta recently soo... birthday gift from them. first set of stickers. deep breaths ok. my parents told me when i bugged them that i just have to make a decision and not ask them all the time, and he said to get 3 stickers i told him id pick 12 so i think getting 9 is reasonable. also oh shit realising that the delivery time is 1-3 weeks and im staying here only 1 and a half more so i should really order it to scotland even tho it might get ther ebefore i do bc my parents might not rly want to send them up to me. idk ok order to scotland, thank f at least one of my flat mates is staying and tbh i should really bring her some chocolate... shes done me faavours. 

[theelectricfilmdiary]

We spent two glorious days walking the streets of Paris, and despite the constant rain it was amazing. Nine hours was spent on a bus travelling from London to Paris – via the channel tunnel aka chunnel, which was kinda freaky: locked inside a bus, in a large train, in a tunnel, under the sea for 40 minutes …..still gives me the shivers!

When we arrived in Paris, it was dusk and we made the decision to avoid the trains, busses and wrong turns (not to mention the arguments where we blame each other for being lost) and caught an Uber to our accommodation. We got lucky with a driver who had spent three years in the states learning english and we chatted away with him about Paris. He told us a bit about the local culture and the goings on with the numerous recent terror attacks. Feeling slightly more educated we were dropped at our gorgeous lil’ apartment in the 4th Arrondissement. The apartment was super cute; small and cosy but had everything you could need and was a perfect haven to return to each day. It was about 8:30pm by the time we arrived and unpacked so we walked to a nearby supermarket and stocked up on cheese, baguettes (of course), olives and cured meats as well as an AMAZING bottle of red wine, and watched… French Kiss! I know, cliché, but it’s so funny. Well sated we then fell into bed.

Morning arrived (11th Jan) and we got up, made a coffee and then departed for a day of site seeing. The first stop – a bakery where I had my first authentic French croissant – and holy fucking shit it was good – too good.  I’ve been ruined for life now!  The next stop was the Père Lachaise Cemetery. Sounds a bit morbid and weird that we would visit a cemetery, BUT there are a tonne of famous musicians and writers (as well as a host of others) buried there and it has become a bit of a tourist attraction in its own right. The first grave stop was that of the one and only Jim Morrison of The Doors. The grave was sectioned off because unfortunately some extreme fans are partial to theft (headstones) and there is one recorded incident where a group of students dug two meters down in the hopes of recovering his hallowed bones before being caught. There are now a couple of hidden cameras recording the grave site visitors. Weird. The next stop was Edith Piaf, an extraordinary French singer who I absolutely love. We also tried to find Oscar Wilde’s grave site, but after searching for about 20 minutes we gave up – more to see in Paris aside from graves anyway…

James, as per usual, needed to pee so we stopped in a cafe and ordered one of the days many espressos so we could use the luxury bathroom facilities (luxury at this point is anything that doesn’t have pee –  or worse – on the floor/toilet seat/walls etc and also provides the most basic of amenities – toilet paper and hand wash).  The coffee of course was better than most we had tried throughout this entire trip – and soo much cheaper than the ones we had in London, Denmark etc – though you have to drink it at the bar, otherwise you pay more for the pleasure of your seat.

From the cafe warmth we strolled the streets until we reached a market selling produce, clothing and nick nacks. The food – OH MY GOD – each vendor (fish mongers, bakery/patisserie’s, fruit and vege, fromagerie (cheese), butchers, Pate and terrines (yes a stall just for them), jams and sauces, olives, flowers, everything you could imagine) had their wares displayed so beautifully – it was art itself. Every part of it was quality too. We came across a stall selling hot food for lunch, french stews, chicken, beef – all doused in amazing gravies and sauces. We had been told that street/market food in France is amazing and that you should try it if presented with the option, so Jim ordered up the vegetable stew with couscous…. SOOO GOOD. We stood on a side street digging in while the rain sprinkled down, and a passer-by commented “bon appetite” – no shit a Frenchman actually said that haha.

We walked along the River Seine admiring the beauty of the Parisian buildings and architecture until we hit the Notre-Dame de Paris – not before being harassed by a few wandering gypsy types trying to scam money out of us. We declined and were promptly sworn at… ahh Paris. The cathedral was beautiful, the front arches ornately decorated with hundreds of carvings, and the inside… dark, brooding, and the stained glass windows shone down a multitude of colours and images. The entry was free also which was great for us backpacking on a budget. After spending about an hour in the cathedral we walked outside to the Point Zero des Routes de France square in front of its big doors and watched people scaring flocks of pigeons into the sky – James of course had a go and leapt/skipped through them like an overgrown, semi-bearded child. Great photos.

From there, another pee stop for James and another espresso – seriously half of the conversations this trip have been based around his bathroom requirements… to which he blames the cold… rather than the two gallons of water he consumes each day. We walked the last hour of daylight home – our feet nearly bleeding stumps by this point – I actually have a bruise on my foot from walking so much. I ran back down to the supermarket and got more bread and cheese, salmon, beans and their rotisserie chicken and potatoes. Perfect dinner to finish the day – We sat in front of the laptop and watched something… so tired I can’t remember!

The morning of the 12th, we were up and out of the unit – this time the agenda was Paris Catacombs, Eiffel Tower and Arc de Triomphe…. Not seeing the Louvre this time unfortunately… we have done so many museums and galleries over the past weeks that we were more keen on seeing the behemoth-monument side of things. Croissant and espresso breakfast was consumed and we walked our way to the nearest metro station where we caught the train to the catacombs. GUESS WHAT?!? They were closed… only through January of course. Apparently we chose a particularly good time of the year to travel. Every city seems to do their renovations just after Christmas. Makes sense really…

So. Rather than getting back on the train we decided to walk… feet be damned… to the Eiffel Tower (we had noticed it towering away in the distance). On the way through some side streets we passed a store which only sold art and books by one of Jim’s favourite artists  – Jean Giraud, aka MOEBIUS. He’s a French comic book artist who creates really bizarre, colourful, other worldly scenes. Kind of futuristic/sci-fi as well. He also inspired the look of the film The Fifth Element. We walked in and looked through all the amazing prints while chatting to the store manager. Before leaving, we bought a poster print as well as a signed print of one of the artists comic book pieces from Blueberry, which is his longest running comic book and is set in the wild west. Moebius died in 2012 so it was pretty cool that Jim got to visit his only store and get something signed by him.

On to the Eiffel Tower – not before yet another bathroom stop… then we were queuing up for security searches, and tickets before being bundled into a small room sized elevator with a hundred other tourists and slowly ascending to the second level of the tower – The third and top most floor was closed… I know… big surprise aye! The view was great though, despite the rain and clouds covering the sky, you could still see a surprising amount of Paris. It was fecking cold. We held out as long as we could taking pictures and looking around before getting friendly with more strangers in yet another elevator. We could have taken the stairs but as I mentioned earlier… our feet are bleeding stumps at this point.  Once back on the ground we walked the short distance over to the Arc de Triomphe, again it was surrounded by tourists. It is massive though, much bigger than we had imagined and is covered in colossal stone sculptures. Beautiful.

A train ride later and we were back on our side of town. A patisserie stop later… more croissants, a lemon tart, and mille feuille….healthy aye. We enjoyed our sugary treats with coffee back at our apartment as night closed in and rain started to pour rather than drizzle (for shizzle). The wind howled up and down our apartment alleyway and we munched away on scrambled eggs for dinner. The next day we were to be up, packed and catch a train to Orly airport for our flight to Lisbon, Portugal so a few movies later it was lights out.

The morning of the 13th of January flew by in a blur of coffee, meticulous packing, and train tickets. Before we knew it we were sitting in the departure lounge drinking Italian beer and prosecco. Paris was amazing, and we wished we had a few more days to explore… next time we return it will definitely be spring or summer. Winter was still great… it’s just a lot was closed and it was cold and raining most of the time which made getting around that bit more draining.

One thing I will mention to anyone planning to visit Paris, or any European city for that matter, is always watch where your walking… dog shit is plentiful, and Jim experienced a good caking a couple of times… hahaha

View from the Eiffel Tower

Dinner at the apartment – night two

Fontaine Saint Michel, Paris

View from the Eiffel Tower

The Eiffel Tower

The Eiffel Tower details

Inside Notre Dame de Paris

Arc de Triomphe details

Paris street art

Paris street details

Fontaine Saint Michel, Paris – Details

Paris street details

Arc de Triomphe details

Fontaine Saint Michel, Paris

Inside Notre Dame de Paris

Arc de Triomphe details

Moebius art shop

Sweet treats and coffee at the apartment

Railway overbridge, Paris

The Eiffel Tower

Inside Notre Dame de Paris

Paris

Arc de Triomphe

This is how our bakery treats came wrapped – so cute

Arc de Triomphe details

Paris, la ville de l’amour et merde de chien… We spent two glorious days walking the streets of Paris, and despite the constant rain it was amazing.