#sorry for the wishy-washy answer!!! i just really don't know

[mariii1]

(ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧ Who's Coming Towards You? (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧

TUMBLR FINALLY ADDED READ MORE ON THE APPP anyway sorry for the delay I went to Portugal then got all my wisdom teeth removed AND im sick 😣🦷 Regardlesss im here and i might do a mini tarot game since I reached 400 FOLLOWRRS 😱but yeah we'll seeee, have fun wit this pac thoo 😜

1-If you're currently dating around or on dating sites, a fuckboy is coming towards you. They may not present as one, but they are. At first, you might think that this person knows what direction they're taking their life in or that they're just very driven in general. But this is just a facade that they put in order to lure girls in. They want a situationship and the don't want commitment. Even if you're not dating or looking to date, this is somebody who might try to ask you out, but it's kind of obvious that they only want kewchie. This could happen during your job, it could be a coworker or customer/client. They could try to hit on you and act like they're super deep or they genuinely want to know about you. There will be very wishy washy when it comes to their intentions, they don't like giving the straight answers.

2- Speed drive by Charli XCX. You might be in a Barbie/girlboss energy. What's coming towards you is some sort of opportunity. If you felt had you had a bunch of options you felt neutral about, youll have another one and I see you going straight for that. This one is really going to stand out to you and I see you when this opportunity is finally offered you're not gonna be hesitant any more and you're gonna be able to make up your mind. Specifically if you been waiting to hear back from somebody, you're going to hear back from them very soon, and it's going to help a lot.

3- So like the pile above clarity is coming towards you. This could be about a specific person, but I'm specifically getting a situation. There could have been some sort of drama in your life and you didn't know which side to take. There could have been a lot of stories and rumors involved. This could have been something really serious that affected you or somebody else financially. I'm getting that this has to do with somebody who's close to you or at least has some sort of influence on you directly or indirectly. You may have had to go to court, had to look up laws or contact a lawyer. But I'm seeing some sort of clarity not a final decision but just some sort of clarity. I think you might find the right lawyer for you if that's what you're supposed to specifically looking for. If not, I still feel like this heavily has to do with finances. Even if you are seeking out something romantically, maybe you want a sugar daddy, you're going to find someone who's going to help you in which you exchange some sort of money with them.

4- the number 4 could be important for you maybe you keep seeing it everywhere or you keep choosing pile 4 in pick a cards. Apply it to your situation but im predominantly gettting that someone you wanted or liked is coming toward you. I think you're still attracted to this person. For some, you could have felt dejected by this person even if they didn't outright reject you. You'll be surprised by how thoughtful they come across when they come towards you and I think they've been thinking about you for awhile. This is someone you've had a crush or attraction to for a minute. Your dreams of dating them will be reborn and may actually happen this time.

5 - HEY BIG SPENDEEEERRR the moment you walked in the joint, I could tell you were a man if distinction a real big spender.... Loveeee that scene from that movie (Sweet Charity). Okay so a few scenarios this could be somebody that presents like they have a lot of money or they could present like they're going to give you a lot of money even if they don't seem to have a lot. But I'm getting you're going to find out that they are broke very quickly and the only thing they have is dick to offer which doesn't pay bills. They probably fought for your attention and this may be somebody who glorifies struggle love. I'm getting they could actually be rich, but they're very stingy. And possibly after fighting for your attention they'll probably ghost you or just go to other people who aren't as naive. A lot of you could be sex workers and specifically getting strippers and this is just another man at the club trying to act like hes some sort of crypto mogul. If not, maybe you're on dating apps, and this is something that might happen.

6- Ooop so apparently this is my pile. I NEED A HERO I'M HOLDING ON FOR A HERO 'til the end of the night and he's gotta be strong, and he's gotta be fast and he's gotta be fresh from the fight..... Anyway this is someone who presents as a fuck boy but in reality, they're just a normal person. So I feel like this is a misconception you're going to have about them when they genuinely have good intentions. I think this person will sort come as some sort of hero in your life. This could come in the form of them giving you a financial opportunity. However, I feel like for most of you they're going to help you financially or be a co-worker that's really helpful. They could give you a really good idea for something financially. Even if you're in school, they could present some sort of job opportunity to you. I think they could also be good to you in general. But at the end of the day, you might actually end up sucking their dick fr like literally HAHAHA I don't think it will be a bad thing. Yeah, you might think that they're coming to ruin your life, but they're really not. Aka opposite of pile 5 🤭.

[eternal-echoes]

Hello, I hope I don't sound invasive, I'm curious about something. How do you choose the type of christianity you want to follow? Catholic is better for more restriction or should I go for the one I feel more connected to? I am very lost now that I am getting my faith back, and I don't know if it is a choice or if I should follow my gut feeling, thoughts? (Sorry for bad english)

Hello Anon,

I will try to answer your question the best that I can.

When seeking a religion, you should pick the truth. We can't rely on feelings because feelings come and go; they're subjective and usually influenced by environmental factors beyond our control. God gave us rationality to differentiate us from animals so we can contemplate how to live our lives and seek Him. Since God is the word, we use our rationality to contemplate Him. In order to know which religion He wants us to be part of, we seek the one He Himself established. Because man, being a finite being, can't reach God - an Infinite Being. So He has to come down to us in order for us to be in contact with Him - and this is the story of Christianity.

So which Christianity do we choose? If you look through history, you'll see that not all Protestant sects have always existed. You can always trace them to a human founder. But when you look at the history of the Catholic Church, you'll see that she has existed way before all those Protestant sects.

There may be some Eastern Orthodox Christians who would object saying that their church has also always existed along with the Catholic Church which I can't really object to because the Catholic Church does recognize their apostolic succession as valid. One of the main (or rather maybe THE MAIN) difference between the Catholic Church and Eastern Orthodox Church is whether or not the Bishop of Rome has authority over all the other bishops and I just don't see how God would give a wishy-washy title of "first among equals" to one of His leaders. Anyways, if you're interested in reading more about the difference between the Catholic Church and Eastern Orthodox Church, I recommend this article by Jimmy Akin. I'll quote a really strong passage from it:

First-century Palestinians had a theocratic view of government—literally. It was the first-century Jewish historian Josephus who coined the term theocracy to describe the Palestinian Jews’ belief that God was the King of Israel and its earthly leaders were his proxies. The political institutions the apostles were familiar with didn’t have people who had figurehead positions. Rulers in the East were strong men. If God gave you authority, he gave you authority.

If you have anymore questions, anon. Feel free to send me asks (I may be late in replying so please be patient but I will get to them). And your English is fine.

[msanimedolphin]

~Back In The Game~

~Chapter Twenty-Nine~

-Series Masterlist-

What happens when a girl who loves volleyball joins a boys' volleyball club? Does she find love? Will she relive her past or move forward? Join (L/N) (Y/N) on a journey with fun twists and turns.

I don't own Haikyuu or any of the characters.

-Last Time-

“Right. First and foremost…receiving.” Ukai says addressing everyone.

“If you can’t do that, you’re useless. We focus on that starting tomorrow!” Ukai continues.

“Yes, Coach! Thank you very much!”

“Don’t forget your cool-down stretches.”

“Okay, guys! Stretch out!” Daichi instructs.

“Yeah!!”

“Graaaah…” Ukai sighs.

“...? Are we really so terrible at receiving that it’s worth that heavy a sigh?” Takeda asks.

“Nah. Yeah it’s bad, but… that’s not what I was thinking.”

“...?”

“Back when I was a player and I was on the side that got picked to play, I never gave it any thought, but…when you’re on the side that does the picking as a coach…you can get stuck with some real tough decisions.” Ukai says while looking at Suga and Kageyama talking.

“...”

“Clean up now! Hurry!” Ukai yells.

“Yes, Coach.”

On your way to help clean, you see Hinata looking off into the distance. Just as you’re about to check on him, he speaks.

“Asahi-san!”

“? Yes?”

“I…I’m no Ace, but…I’m gonna be the Greatest Decoy…so that I can open up the way for the Ace!” Asahi looks at him surprised.

‘Way to go Hinata!’ You think proudly.

“Oh! Um! I still can’t do that without Kageyama’s setting though. But, uh…um…ah…uh…er…ummm…”

“Listen, um… It’s usually the wing spiker playing on the outside left that gets labeled the Ace, right? So that’d be me or Tanaka.”

“? Right.”

“Yeah, hitting through triple blocks and getting most of the sets when things get tough… that’s all part of the Ace’s job. But getting your setter to say something like that about you? I think that’s pretty awesome too.”

“...?”

“Uhh…so umm…yeah. A-Anyway! What I’m trying to say is…despite whatever position anybody plays…don’t you think the coolest player is the one the other team watches out for the most? Like if they said “Watch out for that small middle blocker! He’s crazy fast!” and stuff.”

“!!!” Hinata nods ferociously.

“If you want my spot, I won’t let you take it that easily.” You smile at the two.

“Yes, sir!!”

“Um…that’s assuming I get to be back in the starting lineup though.” You deadpan.

“Geez, Asahi! You are so timid for such a big guy.” Suga chuckles.

“It’s good to have you back too…Suga.” Daichi says.

“I’m sorry I was such a wishy-washy, namby-pamby, fidgety-flighty, indecisive wreck.” 

“I wouldn’t go that far.” You chuckle. “And it’s good to have our reliable libero back. Right, Noya?”

“Yeah!” The libero answers enthusiastically. 

“But no more smacking the vice principal around and breaking stuff, got it?” Noya freezes and has an embarrassed and scared look on his face. “Oh yeah. I guess we got our wuss of an Ace-only-in-name wing spiker back too. I’d almost forgotten.” You giggle at Daichi’s words and Asahi’s facial expression.

“Right. Let’s finish this off and call it a night, folks!” Ukai announces as all the players gather in a circle while you, Kiyoko, Takeda, and Ukai stand to the side.

“Karasuno…Fight!” Dachi cheers.

“Yeah!”

“Oh, Coach.” Takeda says getting the man’s attention.

“?”

“These are the team’s managers. This is Shimizu Kiyoko, a third year.” He introduces, gesturing to the girl, who bows.

“It’s nice to meet you.” Kiyoko says.

“Same to you.”

“And this is (L/N) (Y/N), a first year.” Takeda gestures to you. You bow and then look up to see Ukai has a look of disbelief and hope. When he sees your face fully his expression turns to recognition and shock.

“It’s nice to see you again, Keishin-san.” You say shyly. This surprises Takeda.

“You two know each other?!” He asks.

“Yeah. My gramps used to teach her when she was younger…”

“Don’t forget you would help too.”

“Yeah, you were a terrible student.” He smirks.

“Hey! No, I wasn’t. You were just a bad teacher!!”

“Whatever you say, kid.” You give him a playful evil look. You then get serious.

“So, how is he?” As you and Ukai talk, Kiyoko and Takeda go their ways to let you catch up. The team sees you two talking and wonders if you know each other, and if so, how.

“Okay. Next up…the training camp. Right?” Ukai asks.

“Right.” You reply.

-Bonus-

You’re walking home with Hinata Kageyama, Tanaka, and Noya when Hinata speaks.

“Hey, (Y/N)...”

“What’s up?”

“So I saw you talking with Coach before we left…”

“Okay…What about it?”

“W-Well, you looked like you know each other…”

“Oh!” You giggle. “ Yeah, I know him. His grandfather used to teach me when I was little.”

“Really?!” Hinata, Tanakam and Noya ask. You laugh at their reaction.

“Yup! Keishin-san helped Coach Ukai from time to time as well.”

“Wow! That’s awesome!” Hinata says before he starts asking a million questions. This leads to Kageyama getting annoyed and yelling at Hinata. You laugh as you watch your four friends chat and bicker.

‘I can’t believe I found such amazing friends.’ You think.

~To Be Continued~

[caernua]

PLEASE drop the Arcana opinions

WHY THANK YOU FOR INDULGING ME ANON i will drop some of my hot takes

under the cut bc i went a lil crazy and this is very long (sorry)

i don't really like how much they sanitized the game, i feel like they just made an effort to make everyone much much nicer and agreeable than they initially were especially in the prologue, which is okay (don't get me wrong we love positivity and growth), but at the same time there were moments where i felt like. it was a lil much and a little juvenile. like... it's okay for the main cast to have dislikes between eachother and i was kinda feeling like they eliminated that at one point? it was okay for asra and julian to be bitter, it was okay for nadia to be more hard-hearted and commanding. it was okay for lucio to be liked by his people and not the butt of every joke, it got to a point where he's not believable as a villain or a threat (but tbf muriel's route kinda fixed that) and i definitely think they did that bc of the backlash. a lot of people were saying asra is shady and toxic to julian and nadia is too commanding but ... so what? they looked sexie while doing it so what's the problem??? oh and come to think of it the magic system kinda played into that? i'm not a huge fan of the magic system in the arcana it's very wishy washy and oh everyone can do magic now actually it's within ✨all of us✨. i think it's just not well done

i actually think the earlier chapters and the prologue are overall much better than the last few ones for the main 3 and that includes the cgs. the first few cgs are so beautiful??? the later ones look so weird and uncanny to me?????? i know they had different artists on the team obviously and i think the earlier cgs i'm referring to were moreso done by dana rune and veronica liwski (who by the way deleted their artstation. wild. this is what i mean when i say this is a WASTELAND) and it's a shame how little that is out of the full no. of cgs. dana rune the way you draw asra aaaaaaaaa

i think the way they went about the endings is so, so CLEVER. the choices you have to make are quite subtle, i remember we were wracking our brains as the chapters were coming out to discover what exactly were the good/bad choices and what they could lead to. i like that some of those choices are so subtle that they're pretty much impossible to catch. (for instance. in lucio's first chapter when he tells you to hurry up with the spell you can reply with 'shush/be patient.' those answers are almost the same but they lead to two different endings!!! wild!!) and i think there's a very good balance between 'hard to catch' and 'pretty obvious' choices! and the fact that they went about creating bittersweet endings rather than 'bad' endings is wonderful. i think it's ten times more impactful to have an ending where yes, you are with you love interest and all is well, but not quite. that gnawing feeling of 'what did i do wrong?' sticks to you and urges you to analyze the main characters and it's such good characterization!! i just adore how they went about the endings, it's not too obvious, not too subtle, not too heartbreaking, not too drastic, it's just RIGHT!

i'm really gonna try not to make this next one a novel but asra's route is one of the most beautifully told, gut-wrenching, soul-crushing, utterly devastasting love stories i came across in any media ever. i'm moreso referring to the set-up itself so the prologue + the earlier chapters + everything that happened beforehand. i think his route is underrated just in the sense that. the prologue itself is comically superior when it comes to asra's route, and yea that's bc he's the only one the mc has a preestablished relationship with. but UGH! the fountain scene is probably my fave scene in the game, i love how they mirrored it later on with the roles reversed, it was PERFECTION. they said 'let's take idiots in love' but make it actually make sense and a tragedy. and let's make it the most devastating reason we can think of. it's amazing. the pining, the heartache, the suffering. the mystery being revealed to you little by little (because otherwise the mc goes catatonic, so asra has to be patient, patient, patient) and being flooded by the questions of what were they like before all this?? so interesting to think about. i think it's very important in games like these to stimulate the player into trying to think of a backstory and let their creative juices flow and asra's route does that so well! paradoxically it's also true that they take some of your freedom away as a player because you do find out that there's a bit of history there whatever route you are playing but. the fact that it hardly matters bc he loves mc so much that he would never take their freedom away is amazing. just realizing the amount of love he has for mc, the restraint he has had all those years and how painful it must have been, holy shit. GUT-WRENCHING!! this is why everytime i play another route the second asra shows up and says something even remotely tied to the past i gotta close that route and go back to him kfdhgkjfhdg. this quote in lucio's route is particularly making me scream shit vomit: 'he looked like my first memories of him. kind, but weary, and so very sad.' bitch what the FUUUUUCK

and just. the vibes and the writing of this route overall hoooo bitch. 'why must he go where i can't follow?' 'do i remember? how could i ever forget? i love him, i have to tell him, even if it kills me'. when they kiss for the first time and asra doesn't even dare move because he has held back for so long, and he's physically shaking (bitch me too the fuck). 'i feel it radiating off of him. i want you. i need you. i miss you so much' that insane orpheus and eurydice parallel in the early chapters which also serves as foreshadowing!!! 'i dug until my fingers bled'. 'i try to stay away from you but my heart keeps pulling me back' THE WHOLE DREAMS AS A VESSEL BETWEEN LOVERS TROPE (this shit kills me personally everytime) 'everyday my love for you grows brighter and brighter until it consumes me'. just. this idea of 'a thousand life-altering things happened to part us, but even when i have no idea who you are, i will sooner or later fall in love with you, simply because you are you and i am me and it's bound to be like this, you are my home and i am yours'. INJECT ITTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT 💉💉💉 I PLAYED THIS GAME WHEN I WAS 19, NOW I'M ALMOST 25 AND I'M STILL READING HIS ROUTE CRYING SHITTING THROWING UP AND KICKING MY LEGS IN THE AIR. i'll be a senile 90 year old lady in the old folks' home playing this stupid mobile game on my home crying and thinking 'damn bitch i need to get myself a gemini like that what the fuck'

not that it's a hot take but dorian sucks ass

[dandylovesturtles]

Hi, first off I wanna say I love love LOVE your "I may be invisible but I still look good" book!! I've reread it already like 3 times

I know people can do fanart of your book but I was wondering if it'd be okay if I made it into a comic? I wanted to ask before I just started drawing it and then make you upset because I really don't want upset you! Again I adore your work and I really wanna show my appreciation for you! >-</💖

Hi! Sorry I took so long in answering this; if I’m honest it’s because I went back and forth.

I don’t mind people making fanart or comics or even their own work bridging off my concept at all! I’m not sure how I feel about an entire comic following my fic, though. And maybe that’s not what you intended! But if it is, I don’t know how I really feel about my fic getting a whole comic adaptation. On one hand I’m flattered that you would even want to, on the other hand I feel a little like giving my baby away, if that makes sense?

Maybe you could just do a smaller comic of a particular scene or scenes you really like?

I’m sorry if this feels like such a wishy-washy answer haha, I love if my fic inspires creativity and I hate saying no but I’m also just not sure how I feel about a whole Thing, especially if it’s using my dialogue.

[peppermint-moss]

I have a really important question, how do you feel about your art being used in edits ? And I don’t mean taking your whole amv/pmv and changing the audio , I mean taking a few clips here and there, I want to make sure I’m not crossing any boundaries or anyone else

honestly ive been goin a lil back and forth for a while on how i feel about it; at the moment ive kinda been like i dont really like it but i also dont rlly care enough for it to actually make me uncomfortable/upset ? and then i think maybe i should just let ppl use it for edits if they dont bother me Too much idk... The only thing i know for certain is (wht u already mentioned) do not go taking my whole video and changing the audio etc. But just a few clips agh im not quite sure yet Sorry for the wishy-washy answer I know that's probably frustrating :( I'd say for now I'd prefer if people don't use my art/animations in edits but if that answer changes I'll update it in my FAQ on my tumblr and prob reblog this to inform ppl of it

[lawlietscaramels]

Hello!!

Sorry I'm new to Tumblr 😭 But could you do L and Mello for S and Y? Thank you!!

death note reborn

I'm sorry for the delay! I got overwhelmed 😭 in the end, I just went "for all the reborn asks I haven't finished, I'll just answer one letter, for one character."

I've already done L for S - here - so I'll do Mello for S.

Iiiiiii think he's gay. That's about it. homosexual. I don't really think he's on the ace spectrum; maybe demi or grayromantic. Mello is someone I really struggle to characterise. I don't really have a canon reason for my headcanons either lol. We don't really see him interacting with women in a not holding a gun at their heads sort of way, so I suppose that doesn't help with headcanoning him as not attracted to them. But I'm also a big fan of mellodramattic and recently thanks to the fandom (cough cough LEVI) meronia. As for the arospec side, I think Mello takes a while to warm up to people and displays of affection, especially the more traditional type, aren't his thing. I don't think he really does romantic things. I don't really know, though. It's a bit wishy-washy.

[delusion-of-negation]

Hi! So I just recently came across the info that you have DID, and I wanted to ask - is this a blog for all alters/parts in your body or are you just one of them/the host?

This isn't meant to be rude or something, I'm just curious

I don't take it as rude, don't worry! I hope you don't mind that I'm answering it publicly, just figured it might be useful for other folks who want to ask similar questions. first of all, language like "host" or "original", or even the "protector/persecutor" categories, don't apply very well to my situation, and I'd prefer if people didn't use them to refer to any alters here. we definitely don't have an original (more responding to other people there than you, obviously you didn't say that), it happened long before we ever integrated a singular identity - so it makes no sense to ask who the original is, it's like seeing a person who was born without legs and asking which leg left first. and it's kind of similar regarding hosts, being polyfragmented means we aren't some easily described system of ten people you can track and then say Fronter McGee gets the most screentime, y'know? the term host is too simplistic for what's going on with us (I made this complaint once and somebody said "I just take host to mean whoever is controlling the body right now :)" and it was like ma'am that's not what the term means, the term for that is to front, the host is the boss who typically fronts the most and sits in the big boy chair with a fancy desk and a pipe). we don't have a host, we do have a big handful of alters who are more closely "related" to each other, for lack of a better word (it's really hard to explain this stuff, and I don't want to go on eight different rants in this one reply), who front more often than some of the more distant or specific alters (ones with very specific triggers, for example), but to call them hosts would be stretching the definition of the word, given how many of them there are and how little their role or behaviour resembles that of a traditional host. as for the categories, we just don't fit neatly into them, and they always felt to me like I was doing the DID version of a buzzfeed personality quiz when I tried to use them. I'm sure they work for some people and help them to articulate an experience, but I just don't vibe with them. so yeah, sorry this got long, but I figured since you used one of those words (and only one, I know, they're just all commonly used ones), I'd just take the opportunity to mention that I don't like them and would appreciate them not being used. this blog is for anyone, we're not the type to be very rigid in who's allowed to post where, because of various issues (both related and unrelated to those already mentioned, and I'm too lazy to list them all), but there are alters who prefer to use other blogs that have themes more akin to what they like to post or what they want to see on their dash or whatever. and similarly, none of those blogs are locked from anyone else. overall, we tend to find it easier to take a more wishy-washy approach than to be like "this is who's out right now, they can only use these accounts, they aren't allowed to steal my ice-cream!" otherwise we'd be micromanaging more than your average business owner. alters who might say something truly out of character for this blog know it'd be a dick move to the rest of us to do that, and would probably get them shit from my followers anyway, so they don't do that, and similarly I don't go on their yandere blog and go "actually I kinda prefer people give me space" for the same reason. mutual respect, I think, is a better system for us than each person having wholly differentiated spaces, especially with the amount of blurring and fragmentation and such we suffer from. so yeah, to answer your question, it's open to anyone, but most typically used by a select group of alters for various reasons.

[earthtooz]

Hi earth I'm sorry if this is a weird ask but on what basis do you follow someone :O like you are friendly and interactive with everyone but mutuals with only a few and I'm curios abouy that :> you don't have to answer if this is too private!!

not a problem, anon !! honestly my answer is kinda grey lol, i'm a pretty impartial/indecisive person so if my answer seems really wishy-washy, it's just bc that's who i am lolz.

honestly i don't even know T^T i'm just,,, following someone isn't my first instinct- THIS SOUNDS SO WEIRD TO ACTUALLY SAY OUT LOUD HELP BUT TRUST. i think i'm quite hesitant to follow someone because i like to curate a dash with content i want to see (protecting my peace), and i'm quite particular with it- i have like 40 mutuals or so, is that too little idk :,) for someone who has been in the anime fandom for one and half years or so, that feels so little LMFAO

i interact with a lot of people and i know a lot of people, and i'm always happy to see said people appear in my notifications, and i would consider a lot of ppl on tumblr my 'friend', even tho we're not mutuals. i wouldn't place a lot of value on whether not i'm following a certain account, my following list is just a glorified 'hey, you should check out these blogs bc they're cool!'

normally i follow whoever i see in the tags that i have read quite a few pieces from, but since i'm not all that active in terms of reading or writing rn, i'm just at a stalemate LOL

shitty answer to ur question anon, but just know that i don't know <3 i kinda just interact with content and go and if i like it a lot and see it multiple times, then ig i'll follow?? idk, i don't rly think abt it T^T

oh that said i do follow majority sfw writers, i cannot handle nsfw content 90% of the time so i avoid that wherever possible.

sorry if this makes me sound stuckup and elite or whatever, i don't mean to, but this is the most honest answer i can give >_<

[semperardens-juli]

知足常乐

"One who knows how to be content with what they have is always happy."

This Chinese proverb stuck with me more than the others during my high school Chinese Language class. There was even an essay i wrote on this proverb, which had gotten me to the top class.

When I was assigned an essay on this proverb, there were these nagging questions in my mind. Should I just be happy with what I have? If I do so, would it stop me from achieving more? Do I go for more or be content? At 14, I was torn.

It's been over a decade and here's my answer for that 14 year old girl.

Be content with what you have, but it doesn't mean that blessing won't come your way. It's about the attitude or keeping the good light inside you alive. Gratitude is about seeing with your heart and appreciating the things that are really important. Wanting is simply a well of insecurity that desires but is never satisfy. To conquer the feelings of desire, remember to simply be grateful and have hope about where Life leads.

Contentment doesn't mean be idle. It can also mean being happy doing what you are doing, don't do things with resentment. Often I would do my chores self-righteously alongside a tinge of hatred as well.

Be active while content, even in the face of things that scare you, especially while facing it. Always do what you feel is morally right. You can still be content but also show up for your responsibility in human improvement.

It's also more than a wishy washy fairytale rainbow positivity picture. Life is short. We're mortal beings briefly alive on this earth. The world is full of tragedies but it is also full of small beautiful opportunities of happiness --- and love, especially love. Those little things are worth being alive for.

A lot can happen unexpectedly. Life is full of surprises --- good and bad. You can lose things or people in a snap. What matters is how much you love them at that moment. Don't strangle them, but remember where love is.

Nothing is perfect. You don't look like a model. You don't have a perfect body. Who cares? You have the capacity to love. I'm not talking in a Sunday-school kid all shiny and positive and perfect. I'm talking about a true act of kindness, like ex-addicts turning over a new leaf helping the neighbourhood kid, not the kid who acts all kind because it was a popular thing to do or the politican who is nice to simply gain votes. Whatever it is, I promise in all that is what matters. Those are the things we need to open our eyes and heart to.

And remember, in Nicholas Sparks' A Walk To Remember, Landon told Jamie's dad: - I'm sorry she never got her miracle. - You were her miracle.

So, be grateful for life , because we are surrounded by blessings, and open your eyes and heart to what is truly important.

leave a little kindness

[classiclitbracket]

i don't want to start shit or anything, i just got here late and am curious:

what was the criteria for a book to be here? what is the definition of "classic" for this?

No, it's ok. I've touched on this in a couple different posts, but since this keeps popping up I think it's on me to answer more thoroughly at this point.

All the submission criteria can be found in my welcome post (here), and I would also suggest reading this post I made elaborating on the demographics of authors represented if you feel confused/annoyed by some of the limits I set. That doesn't touch on every constraint though, so if you have more questions feel free to ask.

I have not explicitly defined "classic" in this tournament, mainly because I think everyone has a slightly different interpretation of what exactly it means and I think that's cool and don't want to fight about it, and because I know some people are going to vote for their personal favorites no matter what I say and I really don't feel like policing that. For those who don't like me being all wishy-washy about it I will tell you that I personally think it's related to long term impact and cultural relevancy (not limited to American culture).

Meriam Webster defines classic as "serving as a standard of excellence" and Google says "judged over a period of time to be of the highest quality and outstanding of its kind" if you want opinions that aren't mine.

Additionally, here are the voting guidelines reproduced from my pinned post (here) for your convenience:

You can vote based on your personal favorite, what you think had the most cultural impact, what is the most popular or timely today etc. If you are voting based on personal preference, you should do it based on the content of the original book. However, if you are voting for other reasons, you are welcome to take screen adaptations and/or retellings into account as they are a part of the overall legacy of the book

Sorry if this isn't want you're looking for! I really am trying to help out, but but I don't want to just come out and state my personal opinion on the matter, so this might come off as indecisive or vague. Please don't hesitate to ask me other questions if you have them!

[brokenheartedbabe]

Spam

July 1, 2024

Saturday - Snapchat

I'm really sorry, D, for continuing to push you after you told me to stop. I just care about you so much and I didn't understand what was happening so I overcompensated by trying to control the situation when I should have respected what you were saying. I don't know if you'll see this but all I've ever wanted was to have you in my life, and now I feel like I've lost you forever and it really hurts. I just miss you so much, and I hope you're doing well, and I just want you to know that I really am sorry and I wish I could change the way I reacted to the situation because I would love to still be your friend if you would let me. Anyway, it's late and I probably shouldn't even be typing this, but that's how I truly feel.

Saturday - Snapchat

I'm only sending messages here because I don't think you'll read them. I want to share something with you but I'm afraid to. I don't want to seem crazy, but then again, I think what I'm doing is kind of like your poetry. My writing is a glimpse into my mind. it's everything I've ever thought about you since I've known you. I want to share it with you, but I'm afraid. Would you even care enough to read it?

Saturday - SMS

I'm really sorry for freaking out on you. And I'm sorry for making you uncomfortable and pushing your boundaries. I'm just really sorry for everything and I feel really guilty and I miss you a lot.

Saturday - Snapchat

I don't understand why you answered my text, why you asked me out, why you introduced me to your family, your dog, why you talked about wanting to see me again in the future, literally days ago, and now you're acting like I don't even exist. I just don't understand how you can turn your emotions off and pretend like we were nothing. And maybe we were nothing to you, but it wasn't nothing to me. You said you missed me once, did you really? do you miss me now? Do you think about me? Wonder what I'm doing? Because you're all I think about. I physically hurt at the thought of never talking to you again. The only thing that makes me feel better is writing these messages to you, even though you're not even reading them. It's okay though, this is more for me than it is for you. I would never send this to you if I thought you were actually going to read it. And I hope you don't get a notification from it cause that would be really embarrassing.

Saturday - Snapchat

I keep wondering if you blocked my number. I wouldn't be surprised if you did. And if you didn't, that just means you ignored the text I sent you earlier. Sorry about that, by the way, I was not thinking straight when I sent that. I was gonna send another text saying sorry fo texting, but I figured it was better if I didn't. I keep thinking I should probably delete all of these messages, just in case you o end up seeing them somehow. I don't know. It doesn't really matter right now. I just hope you don't think I'm crazy if you do end up seeing them somehow. Although, I guess a not-crazy person wouldn't even be sending these. I don't know. I just miss you a lot and sending messages on here is the only way to make sure I don't send a message to your phone number. I still wish you would reply to me. I forgive you so easily that it's a little pathetic. Sometimes I wonder if you think I'm pathetic. I do, often. It's pathetic that I can't move on from someone who doesn't want me and keeps hurting me. That's another thing I've been thinking about. You said you keep hurting me no matter what you do. That's not true. You only hurt me when you push me away, which is often I have to admit. I don't know. I'm just rambling at this point I think. I really hope you're not getting a notification from these.

Sunday - Snapchat

Sunday - Snapchat

I've been trying to think of all the reasons why we wouldn't work. Two out of my three friends hate you at this point. You're so indecisive and wishy-washy and it's really frustrating. That's another thing, you say "fustrating" instead of "frustrating". Which, honestly, I don't care about that. You're gonna be working full time and going to school, we'd never see each other. Most importantly, you're in love with someone else, and you keep playing with my feelings because of that. Every time you come back, you tell me that you're over it. That you don't have feelings for her anymore, and then a week or two later, you admit that you're still in love with her. Of course, I always know that you're lying. Maybe you believe it's the truth when you say it, but I know it's not. Someone who's no longer in love with their ex wouldn't bring them up, unprompted, every chance they get. You can't help yourself from talking about her, which I understand. She was, and probably still is, a huge part of your life. I keep thinking about how you admitted to wanting to marry her. it hurt to hear that, even though it wasn't surprising. You talk about marriage a lot, so of course that would have been something that was on your mind. I don't know, I guess I just always hope you're telling the truth when you say you're over it and that you're over her, but you never are.

I'm really sorry that I keep sending these. I promise I'm going to delete them all eventually. I'm just really hurting right now, and sending these helps a little bit. I's like I'm still talking to you, even though you're not getting them. I really wish you would talk to me still. I miss you so much. I miss your voice, your laugh, your smile. I think about you all the time. I think about the things that you said, the things that we did together. I think about the way you looked when you were asleep. you're such a beautiful person. You're so handsome. I miss being with you, in your presence. I miss the comfort I felt when I was around you. I miss what we had, even if it wasn't real. I just miss you so much and I want you back, even if you don't want me. I always think of that one TikTok sound: "it hurts to be something, it's worse to be nothing with you." That's how I feel. Having you in my life, knowing I'm not the one you want, never knowing when the last time I'm going to see you or speak to you again is anxiety-inducing. But not having you in my life at all is painful on a different level. I'll admit, part of me does want you to read these, which is probably why I keep sending them. I'm sorry, I promise I'll delete them soon.

Sunday - Snapchat

I hate not talking to you. I'm getting better, I think, but I still miss you so much. I didn't cry today, though, so that's a small win. Then again, the day isn't over yet. I think about you constantly. When I'm talking to other people, when I'm working, when I'm driving, when I'm walking, when I'm eating. The only time I'm not thinking about you is when I'm sleeping. But every time I wake up, you're my first thought. It's sad, actually. I constantly think about someone who probably doesn't think about me half as often. And it hurts, thinking about you. Sometimes I can't breathe, sometimes can't talk, sometimes I shake. I've never had this kind of reaction to losing someone. I don't know how to deal with it. Maybe you dodged a bullet by pushing me away. Maybe I dodged a bullet. Maybe we're just not meant to be in each other's lives. Every time I think things are good between us, you leave. Maybe that's a sign that I should stop fighting so hard. I'm just tired of everything honestly, it takes so much energy just existing now. Having to go to work, talk to people, come home, take care of my cat, eat, even just laying down is too much sometimes. That's why I sleep so much, and I take medicine to help me sleep. It's the only time I'm at peace. Anyway, I miss you a lot and I hope you're doing better than me.

Sunday - SMS

I'm really sorry for texting you again. I know you probably don't want to hear from me, but I just wanted to let you know that I'm still here if you ever want to talk, and I'll never push you away if you want to reach out. if you don't respond, I'll take the hint and I won't text you again, just wanted you to know that I'm here.

Today - Snapchat

You took a screenshot of a chat!

You took a screenshot of a chat!

You took a screenshot of a chat!

You took a screenshot of a chat!

You took a screenshot of a chat!

You took a screenshot of a chat!

You deleted a chat

...

.....

.......

[sithisreadingcorner]

Sorry @lilith-lies-below when I tried to post your ask, I kept getting error messages! So i have to post it like this.

🧿

Hello I’m T . 3/7/99

I’d love to request a free December reading. I rebloged your post, liked and followed . Also happy birthday month!

I’d love to ask the deity Narcissus feels about me? If that’s acceptable.

I’ll provide a review/feedback thank you in advance

Hello T! Thank you for all of these things, I hope I can help you with this reading! 💜

the magician (ganesh). death (fire) reversed. the storyteller. death (smoking)

Here's the story that I'm picking up here. If the cards are correct, then there is something that you really, really want. You want this more than anything. And I don't know if you have been asking this FROM your deity but at least you have been asking him to help you get or achieve it, and so far his answer has been a consistent no, or no answer, or just kind of a wishy-washy answer. And I'm sad to say it, but the answer is still the same. However it is very important that you understand why, because if you do, you will be able to change this situation.

You strike me as the kind of person who puts their self worth into the things they achieve. And, I mean, that's a great thing to have self worth in except that you set your bar way too high - only grandiose achievements count. And I think that maybe instead of wanting this thing in and of itself, what you really want is some kind of status or feeling that it would give you, that you are the person who owns/did do that. What the storyteller card is telling me is: "Listen to the story." I think that this thing that you want would be like a mirror that reflects back at you and tells you that you are worthy. And just like Narcissus's reflection, this would be your downfall too. This might sound silly to you right now, because you see no harm in it, but that's the catch. Unlike it was for him (in the story) instead of ruining you at once, it will ruin you little by little, day by day, like a destructive habit.

This refusal seems really personal to you, and I'm not gonna lie, I get that... and I'm sorry that it hurts. 😔 But this is not because you are incapable, or not talented! The magician card came out for you and it's so powerful. This is not even the default one - this is like all the positives of the magician with no downsides. My understanding is that this thing that you are chasing would not be a good fit for you either way. I might be wrong, I'm not completely sure. But you have so much capacity to achieve... something, some other things. Great things, even. You are not lacking in anything.

There are a lot of death cards in this deck, but the fact that two of them came out for you of four, literally 50% of your reading is death, is staggering. The death cards are always about cycles, and I think that you are stuck in one, without really realizing it. The thing is, that I can see that you are eager to break out... maybe a bit too eager. 😳

You know, the burning death card is like a forest fire. Most people are terrified to strike a match - and let me tell you, I don't get to tell this to people often, but to me it seems like you are a bit too trigger happy. A forest fire should happen every once in a while, so that new things can grow in place of the old. But you keep burning down the forest every time a little thing goes astray, and then repeat it all over again with very little variation... to then burn it down again, and so on. However, because it happens too quickly, instead of wiping it clean every time, you are getting just the same thing, with diminishing returns. The earth is restless and already scorched. This is why the thing that you ask would be a bad fit for you... in the state as things are right now, you would burn yourself out with it.

You can still turn this around, if you are willing to change your behaviors. What you need in your life is more focus. Don't be scared to follow through the paths that you have chosen! When things have changed, I think, you will be able to reach what you wanted - but by that time I also think you will find a better goal for yourself. 💜

[pick up the poker chip] Y/N?

birthday wishlist

december readings (1 out of 8)

[izaswritings]

ik this is probably annoying but i have to know so sorry😭 do you ever plan om continuing faults of the mind? obviously its ok if not but i gotta know

its all good!! im glad you like the story enough to check up on it!!! at the moment I'm sorry to say I don't really have any plans on continuing it... its been awhile since I've really been into tangled, and I just don't have the time for that kind of project. that said, I've gone back to fics after longer hiatuses before!!!!

my plan atm is to see where the motivation takes me, but if I don't pick up the fic again by 2023, I was thinking of just posting my notes-- so if nothing else, even if I don't get around to writing the final chapters, you guys can at least see how I planned to end it!

[hobipaint]

Graffiti and Chalk- two

summary: You thought you knew him. You thought him gone. Kim Taehyung was part of you that you had carefully suppressed, keeping his memories to one box near the wall of your mind. That was your fault, though - empty walls demand for art. And who other than your own neighbourhood vandal?

↳ pairing: ex police student turned vandal! taehyung x officer! female reader

↳ genres: angst, fluff

↳ word count: 9.6K

↳ disclaimers: pg15!, vandalism, police officers, criminal past and heavy discussion of it, mentions of character deaths.

one | two

a/n: FINALLY AFTER A MONTH IT'S HERE! This took me really long to write but I'm pretty satisfied with how it turned out : it's my longest work yet, and I feel like it would be among my best as well hehe. a massive thank you to @kookiestarlight because i swear i completed this in the first place because of tasha, @swcetnight who pointed out exactly where I need to elaborate stuff and places in which I was loosing parts of the plot because did I forget the whole storyline while writing this 🤡, @vaekth because this bby is absolutely amazing. she's supported me throughout the process of writing this, thank you so much!! thank you to @taecup-fics for beta reading this at the last minute and pointing out a bunch of grammatical errors because otherwise this would be a mess to read 😭 to everyone who has waited - I'm so sorry that it came this late, I suddenly had a bunch of exams that were announced and had to focus on those. Hopefully this lives up to your expectations!! Enjoy reading :)

Morning often dawns with a feeling of hope. With wistful sights of sunrise. Flowers open up to the golden haze that thaws the frost of the night. Birds roam the skies that had been but mysterious domains in the dark. People wake up with groans about the impending day, hopeful for it to end soon. You hoped for your mornings to always be similar to this- some constants were needed in places where you had cases as bewildering as missing pumpkin plushies piling up in your office. 

Your morning today, though, was much different. Much to your annoyance. 

You held the coffee you had brewed for yourself - another espresso, the universe knows you needed it - and handed one to Taehyung just as the cuckoo perching on the clock shrilly announced that it was eight in the morning. 

"Do you still have no answers for me, Y/N?" Taehyung looked at you. His eyes were sullen - no signs of the cheekiness that had peeked at you last night. Scattered rays fell across his body, highlighting the sunken cheeks, brooding eyes and tight smiles you could now see better in the daylight. 

You sighed- probably for the millionth time this night. "I do not understand your question, Taehyung." 

"You remember it. I've asked you thrice since I saw you again, Y/N. Do you not remember anymore? Do you not care for me? Was our idea of us nothing for you?" He looked at you with a myriad of emotions written all over his face- you looked away, not wanting to see them. 

Sighing, you gathered your thoughts the best you could. "Like I said, Taehyung." You looked at him- looking at the person you once fell in love with. The feeling you felt today, though, was much different. There was a feeling of running towards him, taking him in your arms and remembering who he was to you all over again, but it was overwhelmed by the confusion you felt - should you prioritize a past that wanted answers, or a future that was unsure? For now, you chose none pushing the time to make that decision further ahead. "We were an 'us' for only a few hours. Until you stood me up."

He rolled his eyes."That wasn't intentional, Y/N." 

"And how was I supposed to know that, Taehyung? I thought it was, since you had never told me anything beforehand."

Taehyung's eyebrows bunched together, as if coming to hear the stories that his eyes longed to tell- stories of events that you had never seen and never known. "Would you not hear me out, even once? For the sake of our old love?"

You bristled. "What love, Taehyung?" You got up to stretch your legs out, looking at the patchwork blanket that was stuffed in the corner. You had taken that for your first date with Taehyung, planning to cuddle with him and watch the stars - a date that never happened. "What love? A love where you don't speak to me for weeks, and then vanish for some crime? We were young then, and I got hurt then as it is. There's no need to go over this right now." 

"That was not my fault, Y/N. You know that." Taehyung seemingly sunk back into his chair, eyes downcast. "I had said I loved you. Before I ever went out with you." 

"Like that matters,” you scoffed, “what's the point in reminiscing promises from an old love?"

"At least, hear me out?" He looked up at you with hope sprinkled in the abyss of his eyes. "I don't want you to forget me."

You turned back to your chair, tearing your eyes away from the blanket that was now a pale blue in the sunlight - a few shades lighter than the cerulean colour it would be in the afternoon. "Not now, Taehyung." 

Taehyung sighed, looking at the floor, tension exhaled into the room. He sat silently for a few seconds, the ticking clock announcing each moment clearly to you. "That's fair. It's just.." He looked back at you. "I'm used to thinking of you as the person I loved." He nervously let his eyes pan around the windows, gazing at the sunshine that streamed through the window, before turning back towards your gaze. "I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortable, I'm just really grateful for your presence-" 

"Taehyung." You sharply interrupted him. "Two years ago, when your case was reopened for investigation. Who did that?" 

"They told me that it was a well wisher in the neighbourhood. Another jailor said it was for good behaviour." He shrugged. 

You scoffed aloud, more loudly than you would have liked him to hear. 

He frowned, lips drawn in a tight line in annoyance. "Don't believe me? I'll have you know, Y/N, I was among the most well behaved at prison. Absolutely no tantrums. I even ate the salt-less, disgusting food they'd give there. No crying. Nothing. I can show you later on if you want, I think I have a report stuffed somewhere here," He got up, shuffled towards his bag and checked the last zip, hunting for a report you had never heard of. 

"It was me." 

Taehyung whirled around to face you, unruly hair swinging like the seats of a carousel at a carnival, and raised an eyebrow. "What were you?" 

"I was the one who insisted on opening the case for reinvestigation, the case of your stepfather's assault. Went around collecting evidence, searching for people who knew about your family better, getting their voices recorded, finding about the whole deal to frame you and stuff. Nearly got fired." You shrugged, sipping your espresso and wincing- too bitter. "You're welcome, by the way. The coffee is getting cold." 

"I don't care about the coffee." He moved the cup aside - nearly spilling the liquid, roughly settling back into the seat he had been occupying for the last few hours. "You were the one who asked for re-opening the case?" 

"Just said that." 

He slumped back in his seat, and your eyes took in how he spread himself out on the chair, tiredness lacing his figure. "I didn't know that." 

"Now you do." You said, sipping your coffee and watching Taehyung do the same. 

Taehyung stared blankly at you, and you couldn't fathom what was swirling in those ebony orbs of his. "Why did you do that, Y/N?"

"Honestly," you smile softly at him, "I was expecting a thank you."

"You should have expected questions, Y/N. Why did you help me?" Taehyung's blank expression made way for a confused one, eyebrows furrowing and lips pouting. 

"I did what I had to do as a-" You paused here, unsure of what to say. "As a friend, Taehyung, nothing more. I knew you were innocent-"

"How were you so assured?" He pressed on."I could be a complete 180 from the man I met you as. I could be fake. I could be an impostor. I could-"

"You could do a bunch of things, Taehyung." You stared him straight in the eye, trying to keep your emotions at bay. "But you could never tell a lie." 

Taehyung scoffed. "You sound like one of the wishy-washy pick-me kind of girls in the movie. No, I don't lie, but I could." 

You sighed. As much as you cared for Taehyung, you had never really cared for his argumentative attitude. "I went with the assumption that you were the same person I knew, Taehyung. The one whom I respected and trusted. I acted on that feeling." 

"That wasn't trust, Y/N. It was naivety. You were naive to believe me." Taehyung paused, uncertainty lining his forehead as he spoke. "You shouldn't have trusted me." 

You rolled your eyes- you couldn't understand why he was so desperate to make sure that you remained aloof from him. What had you done to be treated like that? What had he done to force everyone away from him? 

You tried to play off his remaining doubts and frustrations as insecurities he developed while in jail, and moved on."Alright then, you impostor. I was naive to trust you. And even more naive to believe you. Happy? Now shush. I don't want to talk about this." You tried to clear your mind of any doubts you had about Taehyung, but his behaviour, the way he interacted with you - it couldn't help but increase the worry and confusion in your mind.

Taehyung leaned forward to look you in the eye before smiling softly at you - you couldn't understand why. You were going to give him a criminal record, maybe arrest him. You were potentially ruining his life again, and he smiled at you. "If you say so, officer." Taehyung said, settling into the chair - leaving your mind reeling with questions you weren't sure you wanted the answers to. 

You opened the laptop again, wearily. "Let's get back to the questions; the sooner we finish this, the better. Where did you source the paint from?" 

"You mean the graffiti? And chalk?" You nodded. Taehyung sighed."Terminology, Officer, terminology. Make no errors." He raised a finger to wave at you, as if to say no. You rolled your eyes -it seemed that you were the only one concerned about what would happen to him after this, because Taehyung quite clearly was not. "I bought it with the allowance money that was kept for me in the bank- as much as I hated that man, his cards proved to be useful."

You raised an eyebrow, skeptical. "You didn't steal it." 

"No. Took it from my step-father's account. Technically, now mine. Apparently he left everything to his children, and I'm the only one alive that I know of. Maybe he had other children- I wouldn't doubt it for a moment if he had, but that doesn't change my right to his money either." 

"Any other members of your family who had been granted access to that account?" You asked, wanting to make sure that there were no loopholes - you didn't want a future possibility of Taehyung being entangled with the wrong side of the law again. 

He rolled his eyes, leaning further. "Curious little thing, aren't you? Like I'd told you last night, most of them are dead. Mom had died a few months before I was arrested - thanks to my stepfather being an alcoholic and taking everything out on her. Grandmother already had massive health issues - she passed away after two years of me being in jail - they had let me come out for her funeral."

"My siblings - a brother and sister, if you remember - were taken in by a distant relative, and the last time I spoke to them was three years ago. I'm not allowed to contact them because I might end up being a 'bad influence'," he air quoted the words, laughing mirthlessly. "Guess they won't be too delighted to see me again. You probably know about my stepfather - got drunk and passed out. Permanently. But yeah, that's all. I'm pretty much the sole benefactor from that account."

Hearing how nonchalantly he spoke about it, you were forced to maintain a strong face and be professional. You couldn't possibly think of even wanting to comfort him in any way. "So, you were absolutely not stealing."

"Nope. No. Not at all. Want any further repetitions?" 

"That won't be necessary," You said, having typed out the information - tracking his expenditures would also be necessary now, apparently. "Any expenditure you make shall be monitored, now. Be careful."

"Always have been." He chuckled, getting back to spinning the glass on the table. "You know me." 

You ignored him. "Your cards will be tracked, and any loose cash will be checked by us. If we feel that there's any room for suspicion, you will have reason to be monitored." 

An odd silence filled the room while you tapped away at your laptop, filling in more details about the incident. Taehyung would be having a criminal record again, you thought to yourself. It was the only thought that echoed in your mind. It made you feel uneasy in a way, but you swallowed your unease down. There's a promotion to focus on. 

"Taehyung, something has been bugging me since I caught you vandalising." You shifted a little bit, before deciding to spit out the question. "Why did you do it?" You leaned forwards on the table, elbows digging into the wood as you tried to grasp the answers from him. 

Taehyung looked you in the eyes, and then looked away. "I don't know."

"You don't know." You raised your eyebrows, leaning back incredulously. "Taehyung, that's not an answer." 

"I did it because I wanted to. It was fun. I'd see kids in the morning pointing at my graffiti work and they would like it. There would be people claiming it looked good. I felt acknowledged and I just-" He pleaded, unable to continue without pausing to recollect his calm. "I felt like doing it. After years of having questions raised at me for committing a crime I never did, I finally had people talking about the work I did. Even if it was just chalk drawings." 

You exhaled in confusion. The Taehyung you had known - he was never like this. Confident, assured, independent. That was what he seemed to you when you were younger. And now, to see him want to be validated by others who never even cared for him- it felt ridiculous to you. Why was his only way of feeling validated involving something against the law? "Okay, then." 

You went through the complaints that had been registered against him, hand resting against your forehead as you asked him the most commonly asked question. "Why the insignia 'V'?" 

"V for victory?" He made a 'V' sign with his fingers, "I liked to think that I won against the world by rebelling against its sense of black and white. I saw everyone talk about it, and I felt like the same people who had once pointed fingers at me, blaming me for something I hadn't done, were now pointing fingers at something I had done - I felt victorious. I didn't need to show myself and possibly want more than I had already let myself have - this was enough for me." 

You pulled your lips in a tight line, and hummed in response - there were two places that together had put in about twenty complaints, so you had to respond to all of them. You kept reminding yourself that neither did you have the space to feel sorry for him, nor did you have the power to say sorry to him. You simply kept your head turned to the screen, typing in answers to all the complaints. 

Taehyung leaned forward after a few seconds. "What punishment do you think I'll get, Officer?" 

"If the chief is feeling good, maybe you'll get community service, with a fine," You looked up at him. "Or maybe some time in jail." 

"How much time?"

"Maybe a month or two?" 

"Oh." Taehyung slumped back into his seat nonchalantly. "Cool then." 

How was he this calm? You thought to yourself. He might be going to jail. For a second time.

"Yup." You shut the laptop, finally, after hours of typing information and recording it. Sighing, you lifted the porcelain mug once again to absolutely drain it of coffee, your rather loud gulps echoing in the silence of your office. 

Taehyung tapped his fingers on the table- probably some old tune he had learnt before. You remembered that he played the saxophone - from nights of serenading tunes that he had played for you with his beloved instrument. "How long do you think the chief will take to reach here?" 

"A few hours, maybe? I'd expect him around ten, to be honest. Nevertheless, let me check." You quickly called the chief on your phone, hearing his ringtone play some old Korean trot song before it was picked up. 

"Hello, yes, yes, Y/N. I expected your call." A gravely, rather rough voice responded to you- like it hadn't been used for a few hours. "I shall be reaching the office around eleven. Keep Taehyung with you." 

"Yes sir," you said, keeping the phone on your table and turning to Taehyung.  "The chief said he'll be here by eleven." 

Taehyung nodded in acknowledgement. 

"It's nearly eight thirty now." You looked at the cuckoo clock again. "Would you like to freshen up?" 

"Where?" Taehyung asked, eyes widening. "Shouldn't I just be at the office?" 

"Yeah, you should. My place is right here- the back of this office is where I live, so you'll be fine." You look down at his clothes, grease, paint and metal shrapnel all over them. "Besides, you look like you need a change of clothes." 

Taehyung stepped into your house with an air of curiosity, to see how his once classmate was living. His head stooped low to enter through the small door you had, eyes widening in surprise when he found that the hall of your house was larger than he had anticipated. 

The house was quaint, a hall with an old couch which doubled as a bed when needed. There was a table in the middle of the room, too low to be a dining table and too high to be a center table. For coffee, maybe? There were maybe five or six magazines scattered haphazardly over it, covering nearly every inch- except for one corner, where Taehyung spotted a shining acrylic blue. 

You, however, spotted what page you had left a magazine open at. Squeaking, "I'm sorry!" you ran to shut the booklet close, afraid that Taehyung would spot your love for shirtless men. 

Picking up the magazines, you grinned sheepishly at him. "Just a moment! I'll be back, a bit of cleaning to be done, sit right here!" You patted the couch, trying to convince Taehyung. 

Taehyung turned away from the pictures he had been observing- was there one of you both? - and nodded, eyes widening in surprise as he saw how you scuttled away to hide the magazines. He looked around again, taking a feel of your house- it seemed like the old you. There was some patchwork embroidery you had left in a corner, atop what seemed to be a showpiece? Taehyung stepped closer to see it in detail, and was amazed at the way you had managed to drag the red thread over and over the pink fabric to make floral designs. It reminded him of the rose he had been trying to complete the previous night, and he grit his teeth. He shouldn't be thinking about that now. That shouldn't be what he does anymore. No more.

You came back, looking quizzically at him. "Take a seat, Taehyung! It's alright." 

"Uh, yeah." He shuffled over to the couch again. "Did you make that?" 

You looked in the direction his finger pointed to. "Yeah. Tried doing embroidery for stress release purposes." 

Taehyung grinned at you. "Stress release?" He asked, bemused. 

"Yup." You said while making sure that the magazines were well hidden. "The department I wanted to be in was forensics, you know?" Taehyung nodded, he had been privy to most of your discussions about the advances in forensic technology and analysis - even if he didn't understand anything, he knew your love for it. "Well, they didn't allow me. So the whole 'stress' thing began." You walked back to him, making air quotes as you emphasized on stress. "My mother suggested embroidery would take my mind off it. So, that incomplete piece you see there?" Taehyung nodded, concentrating on every word that left your mouth. "That started a few days ago." 

"It looks like it's complete, though- are you really good at it?" Taehyung looked at you again, turning back from the embroidery you were now rising to get. 

"Pretty much? It's easy once you get the hang of it." 

"Ah." Taehyung said, a dull silence settling into the room for a few moments as Taehyung looked around your room.  

"That picture." He pointed, and you turned your head around. The picture he was focusing on was on your mantelpiece, resting happily. The frame had butterflies stuck on its corners, two large and two small. The border was white, now off white, and had pink dots in certain places. It was a picture of fireworks- red, yellow and blue mixing together in a dull sky to breathe life into the picture. And right in the middle, surrounded by this liveliness, were you and Taehyung. Beaming. 

Taehyung turned to, finger still pointing at the picture. "That's our picture, right?" 

You hummed in affirmation. "That's us, freshman party. We had known each other for a few weeks at this time."

"And I had stopped someone from asking you out, right?" Taehyung reminisced. "That was fun." 

You snort. "You had punched him in the face when he asked for my name, Taehyung." 

Taehyung smiled. "I didn't want anyone to harm you, Y/N, and he seemed like he would harm you." He spread out his arms and grinned smugly at you. "In a way, I rescued you. That night." 

And so many other nights, you wanted to say. For all the time you had known Taehyung, he had been fiercely protective of you - for reasons he never truly told you. You didn't question it either, basking in the feeling of being wanted by someone. 

You cleared your throat, hoping to clear your mind as well. "You should go take a shower, Taehyung." Glancing at the clock, you noted the time and motioned towards the washroom. "It's nearly nine. Go take a shower, call for me if you need anything. I'll go get some clothes for you."

Taehyung nodded, rising up slowly to go in the direction you pointed. "Towels are inside," you shouted after him, and he yelled in response to say he understood. In some ways, too many ways, he felt like the Taehyung you once knew. 

You went to your room to pick out some clothes, opening your meager collection to salvage something that would fit Taehyung. Your eyes scanned over your uniforms, jumpsuits, jeans, t-shirts and finally landed on the hoodies- probably the largest collection in your wardrobe. Thankfully, you loved large, loose hoodies. You started pulling them out, holding each one up and imagining Taehyung's proportions in them. 

The red one, with blue paw prints. "Nah. Too tight." 

The black plain one. "That's mine, I'm not sharing that." 

The grey ones- nearly three. You skipped over all of them, not understanding how none of these oversized hoodies would seemingly fit Taehyung. He'd gotten humongous, broad shoulders and everything. 

You picked out a few more, trying to see whether it would be a fit. None worked. 

When you picked up the next one, you could already picture him wearing it. It was the hoodie you had taken from Taehyung during the first year you knew each other. You looked at its loose sleeves, stretchy from you tugging Taehyung behind you with it way back then. The green fabric of the hoodie was slightly pale in a certain spot - you had spilled soda all over him in a fit of anger.

During your forensic chemistry class,  the teacher didn't recognise their mistakes in the procedure (they used the wrong test for detecting the sample, and blamed it on you), and you were pretty miffed the whole day. Taehyung had bought sodas for the two of you, having planned to go stargazing later on. And you, in a terrible mood, flipped him off in a way that had the soda spilling over him. You cried, Taehyung laughed, but the hoodie was still stained. You took it with you later on to clean it - but the stubborn stain never left. You were agonized, Taehyung amused, but the hoodie- it was still stained. Taehyung had laughed it off, telling you to keep it with you for as long as you wanted- he could buy a dozen more hoodies to last him till then. 

When you left to head home that winter break, you had taken the hoodie with you. You had taken it on your date, crying on its sleeves when you were stood up. And when you came back, Taehyung was suddenly a criminal. 

You shook your head to remove the memories of that time, holding the hoodie in your hand and gently caressing its sleeves. So many memories were held in these threads that meshed together to form the fabric of your youth. Good or bad? You didn't want to dwell on that. 

"Y/N? Could I get the clothes now?" Taehyung called from the washroom. You picked up a extra large pair of cotton shorts and a hoodie, and passed it to him without really thinking- you'd done it before when he got drunk at college too, having him come over at your place, shower, change, and practically behave like a couple- at least, that's what you had thought of it then. 

Get it together, Y/N, why are you thinking about that? 

"Thanks!" he shouted again, grasping the clothes with his fingers and whisking them away to the confines of the washroom. 

You gripped at your hair and pinched your cheeks. You couldn't keep thinking about the old Taehyung. You didn't know if it was truly him anymore. 

"Uh, Y/N?" Taehyung stepped out of the washroom, the previously oversized shorts clinging to his thighs for dear life and the hoodie snugly fitting his figure. "I think it's a bit tight, but I'll make do." 

Your eyes widened in horror; Taehyung looked like he was moments away from bursting the shorts. "I'll get you new pants, wait a second. These ones don't fit." 

You turned back to your cupboard, looking for the loosest bottoms you could find. "I think the hoodie still fits though, right?" 

"Yeah." You heard Taehyung right over your shoulder, scaring you. 

"Jeez, when did you get this close to me?" You turned to face him, crossing your arms, looking at his hair which still had droplets sticking to its edges. 

"When did you get this far from me, Y/N?" His eyes bore into yours, sweetly intense eyes gazing at you like it was the first time he saw you. "What happened?" 

You shrugged, not wanting to answer it. You picked up a loose pair of denim jeans that you had found stuffed away at the back of your closet. Pushing it into his hands, you told him to go change. 

Apparently, your instructions fell on deaf ears. "What happened, Y/N? Answer me. Please."

You moved your gaze to his clothes, not wanting to focus on the thoughts that rushed back when you thought of him. What had happened? You moved your hands to your sides, resisting the need to hold him and know him all over again. "The hoodie looks good on you. Would you-" 

"So do our hands." He held yours, snugly fitting his palm- your calloused fingers against his calloused ones, heat burning in the sleeping embers of your palm. His eyes gazed at the joint fingertips almost reverently. "They fit well."

"Taehyung, now is not the time-" You begin, cut off by his frantic breathing.

"When is the time, Y/N? When will I get to live? When will I get to feel like a human? When will I be innocent?"

His hand caressed your palm, touching your forearm, your elbow, your shoulder, and your cheek -leaving a burning trail behind him everywhere he touched. You shivered. "Do you know how long I have wanted you, Y/N? Years. Seven years, now. I have loved you for years. I have wanted you for years. I did all sorts of things to remember you while in jail- kept asking for you, kept calling for you. I didn't want to forget you, Y/N. Not you. I couldn't forget you, no." 

He pressed your palm to his chest, and you could feel a dull thump echo through the clothes, reverberate in your palms. "That fire, Y/N. My passion in the promises I'd made to you. It never went anywhere. I always loved you. I always will. You can't make me leave again, not again. Please, no." 

He held your palm up to his cheeks, not regarding the tears that were streaking your cheeks and his. "You feel me, right? It's me. Taehyung. I am the one you trusted. I'm the same. Trust me again. Please." 

You tried to hold back the tears that threatened to slide down your cheeks, not wanting to pain Taehyung anymore. He held your forehead to his, pressing on the back of your head to meet his - upclose, you could see the redness that clouded the shine that his eyes would normally have. You couldn't hold back your tears anymore, nearly whimpering when you saw how broken he was- sirens swimming in the whirlpool of his eyes, singing songs of misery. "You know me, right? Do you know me? Do you recognize me? Kim Taehyung, police cadet. Your friend. Your classmate. You know me, right?" He asked, nose nearly brushing yours. "Do you know me?"He cried, eyes washing over the fire that ignited behind his pupils. You didn't see a vandal, or a criminal, or a friend. You saw a broken man. 

"Taehyung, oh, Tae," you cried, putting your hands on his shoulders, watching him slink down to the ground as his body trembled and shivered. You wrapped your arms close around his figure, unable to understand his pain but just wanting it to go away. 

You sat like that for a while, coaxing the tears and short whimpers out of him as he held onto your fingers, wanting to remember something he once had: you. 

"I always asked for you, you know that?" Taehyung shivered as he spoke, even if the chills of the weather outside barely seeped into your home. "I always loved you. I don't know why they kept me there for so long, Y/N. I didn't do anything wrong. I don't know why I'm made to feel like this…" he trailed away, tears gathering at his chin as they endlessly flowed down his cheeks. 

You glanced a nervous eye at the clock, wanting to make sure that you get to the station- no matter what happens. The bubbling of water distracted you from the ticking of the clock, and you turned off the stove. Scouring your cabinets for a chamomile tea bag was hard, but you knew you needed it. Taehyung always seemed to calm down with tea - you had used it multiple times before. Times of which you have multiple memories. Times you wish to forget. 

Why did I ever love Taehyung? The question kept echoing in your mind as you leaned on top of the kitchen counter top. Things would have been so much simpler if simply looking at him wasn't so hard. His smile, his behaviour, his tears - it was all but a painful reminder of what you could have been if things had gone different. If only. 

You poured the hot water into the mug you had settled on the kitchen top, watching the water bloom into a serene shade of yellow as you dipped the tea bag into it repeatedly. You prepared one mug, then another, hearing the soft declarations Taehyung kept repeating while he was seated. 

All you had wanted to study was forensic science, and that was simply for one reason: you didn't want to interact with people. 

People are complicated, over emotional beings. and you couldn't help but feel helpless every time you had to encounter a suspect. You would constantly be told by your professors to see them as lawbreakers - but all you tried finding was signs of humanity in them. That even the most vicious killers had scope for reform. That's why you stuck to the subjects you wanted - you were good at finding signs of life, not squashing them. You consistently failed those classes, without any doubt. And today, it seemed like all those classes were laughing at you. 

"Here." You handed the mug to Taehyung, who muttered thanks. He rubbed his hands once or twice on the pants you told him to change into and took a sip from the warm tea. You resisted the urge to reach out and wipe the tears that lined his face, and try and wipe the scars of the past that had scarred him so badly - but you couldn't. You were a mere spectator in the game of his life. You couldn't possibly do anything other than hurt him more. 

"Thank you. For letting me express all of it. I could finally say everything that I wanted to before I was forbidden from speaking about it again." Taehyung tapped against the mug, fingernails resting on ceramic as the sun slowly headed westward. "I'm sorry that I've been such a burden to you, Y/N. I wonder if I can do anything to reduce the pain and confusion I put you through - I doubt I can." He looked at you carefully, though you couldn't tell what he was thinking. "Thank you." 

You let his words echo in the room, preoccupied with your thoughts. It hurt you to see him so broken, and you couldn't help but worry about him. 

"Taehyung, I-" You opened your mouth to respond, watching Taehyung pay attention to every move you made - only to be interrupted by your phone loudly ringing. 

"Sorry, this must be important." You got up to get your phone, watching Taehyung slump in his seat from the edge of your vision. 

"It's the chief," you announced, picking up the phone. 

He got straight to the point. "Come to the station, soon. Bring Taehyung with you." he told, his voice laced with a rather sharp edge- a tone that you had recognized in the years you had worked under him. Things were- most probably- not good. 

You responded with a simple "yes", mind dwelling on the impending result that Taehyung would get. You felt that it would be unlikely that he would be going to jail- at least, you hoped so.

Turning to Taehyung, you tried to hide the fear and shakiness that lined your voice. "Let's go." 

Taehyung sighed, playing with the mug as he rose up. "It's time, isn't it?"

"Good morning, Sir." You greeted the chief as he hurried into the small office, giving Taehyung a glance and then facing you. 

"Morning." He gruffly responded, turning to your laptop. "We found an eyewitness for the vandalism, so we are getting them for the interrogation as well." 

"Another interrogation? We've already done it, sir, and all the information is recorded here. I doubt it will be necessary-"

"Please, Y/N," He calmly said. "Leave the decision about it being necessary to me." 

You stepped back, subconsciously edging closer to Taehyung - a move noticed by the chief as well. 

"Y/N," he began, "I need to speak to you. In private. Step outside for a few moments, please." 

You nodded, briskly walking towards the doors and yanking them open. There was a warm gust of wind that blew across your face, and you turned to face the chief. 

"Y/N," the chief began, before pausing for a moment, "Officer Y/N. I'm going to need you to think clearly now." 

"Yes." You set your features as tightly as you could, not wanting to seem distracted in any way. 

"Do you have any type of bias in this case, perhaps due to your past relation with him?" he looked quizzically at you, as if trying to decipher an enigma scribbled onto your face. 

Your blood chilled, for some reason. Were you having any bias? "No, sir." 

The chief hummed - you couldn't make head or tail of his reaction. He kicked at a pebble before continuing. "From the recordings I heard the previous night in the office, and the way you let him come with you to freshen up a bit, one particular thing has struck me: you were trying to find reasons for Taehyung to be justified as a victim, weren't you?" 

You gulped before responding. "Yes, sir. I believe the culprit committed vandalism as a coping mechanism to get over the hurt caused over the years." 

The chief sighed heavily. "Well then," he said, "I suggest we continue with our investigation, and find a way to make sure the culprit in the matter is stable as well. We can't have repeated cases like these - we have a reputation to uphold for the police as well." 

You nodded stiffly. "Yes, sir." 

The chief sighed again, glancing at the street. "Our witness should be here soon." He turned to you again. "Funnily enough, she volunteered as a witness with CCTV backup to claim that Taehyung had vandalized her shop too. Apparently she heard you arrest him last night - so we have to hear her out." 

The chief turned again to the road, eyes narrowing in hopes of spotting the witness soon. "The investigator whom she contacted has said she is a reliable witness, but I'm going to need to verify her statement nonetheless." He turned back, heading into the office.

You stared at the road that the chief was looking at before - the direction from which the supposedly reliable eyewitness would come, before heading back inside. 

Taehyung was still slumped in his seat, fingers tracing drawings all over the pants you had given him. The chief was shuffling around behind the desk, pulling two spare chairs ahead - one for Taehyung, you presumed, and one for the eyewitness - whoever that would be. 

"Mr. Kim Taehyung," the chief began, "there has been an eyewitness who has offered their testimony - whether it is to defend you, or further establish evidence of you vandalizing public spaces, I'm not yet aware. We shall be interrogating them - and maybe you, as well, now." 

Taehyung rose up from the corner he had settled into, and shuffled into the seat the chief had set for him, wordlessly. 

The door opened to reveal an older lady, dressed in a purple shaded hanbok, hair delicately pulled back into a tight bun and eyes peering around the whole office in curiosity. She found the chief, walking closer to the desk where he was arranging the records. "I'm here as the eyewitness..?"She said, looking at both you and the chief. 

"Ah, yes. I presume you're Ms. Park?" The chief asked, pulling the chair out for her to settle into it. Under the light that shined across her face, you could make out the wrinkles that lined her skin and the greys in her hair - not that that was relevant to what would happen. 

"I saw him vandalize the outside of my store a few days ago," she earnestly began, pulling out pictures that she had taken of the design on her window.  "I'm a florist, you see. His designs are clearly inspired by that, aren't they?" She pushed the pictures in front of your vision, and you could see what she meant - the designs of orchids, hibiscus and asters stared back at you, intricately painted onto the glass windows of the florist's shop. 

She pulled out more pictures. "There's been similar instances all over the neighbourhood- the other florist had a rose, the school received drawings full of children's stories and fairy tales, and had their walls painted with similar stories. In fact, the restaurants around here even said that their menus were drawn onto the streets, right in front of their doorstep." 

The chief looked at the pictures carefully, with you peering at them as well, taking in the detail that Taehyung had while he worked while making each of his works- no, vandalising, you corrected yourself. He raised an eyebrow at the eyewitness, who seemed to shrink into her seat. "What does this bring forward as evidence for or against the culprit? We already know what the crime is, and its details. We just have to determine a punishment- either a hefty fine or jail. Do you have anything that can justify him getting exempted from either?"

Ms. Park looked at you and the chief before turning to Taehyung apologetically, placing a hand on his knee - as if consoling him. "I think that at the end of the day, all he was doing was beautifying the neighbourhood, wasn't he? And most of the residents here don't have a problem with it-" the chief looked at her incredulously- "so please, don't punish him or something. A lot of people appreciate his work in our neighborhood, you know?" 

"But we have been receiving complaints about him since the past few days," the chief said. "Why the sudden change in opinion?"

Ms. Park fidgeted with the hem of her hanbok for a few moments, shaking her head nervously. "Some of us shopkeepers were really bothered by it at first, yes, but we also had some customers come over to inquire about the artwork. It looked professional to them. So we came to an ultimatum : we will let this young man paint and draw for us, on our walls, as much as he wants - as long as it's pretty," she emphasized, one hand patting her chest, "we'll pay him to do it." 

You held back a sob as you saw Taehyung's eyes glimmer - a ray of hope shining in them.His knee bounced up and down- a habit you knew was something he had had since years - and he smiled softly when Ms. Park squeezed his hand. You felt like things were finally going to go well. The chief exhaled roughly before rubbing his forehead, glancing at Ms. Park, who smiled at him in the hope that he would understand her reasoning. 

"The law, honestly, doesn't care about intentions- I don't think I really understand why I should even let him go. Vandalism is a punishable offence, and the perpetrator has been aware of its consequences. Why the sudden feeling to save him?" The chief questioned, eyes steely and tough. 

Ms. Park hesitated for a few moments. "I believe he deserves a second chance." She pulled her chair ahead, the metal ends scraping against the tiles, and pleaded once again. "He was arrested for years for something he hadn't even done - and now, might face a few more months in the same place for simply being artistic. I don't think it deserves punishment."

"That's for the law to decide, not you, madam." The chief sternly said. "I suggest you leave such decisions to us."

The room remained tense and quiet for the next few moments, and your eyes were trained on Taehyung. You noticed the quiver in his hands, the way he shrunk into his chair - as if to hide away from whatever the upcoming decision would be. 

Ms. Park was the first to interrupt the loud silence. "Oh, come on. Let me just pay for the boy's bail." 

The clock chose that moment to loudly announce the next hour: was it eleven? Twelve? You weren't paying attention. You only saw the way Taehyung rose up from his seat - in happiness, you thought - with fists sticking to his sides. "No. I won't accept it." 

You felt the chief look with just as much disbelief as you did. Why was he so hellbent on being a perpetrator when he could be free? 

Ms. Park laughed. "No. I'm not listening to that whole self righteous thing that you probably have," she swatted the air with her hand, as if to push away any explanations Taehyung could give.

"Look, ma'am. I have the money to get a bail, or even pay the fine. I don't want you to pay for me and then hold it above my head like a massive favour you have done for me." Fire blazed in his eyes as he spoke up, rather indignantly. "I can take care of myself." 

"To hell with that attitude," Ms. Park said. "I decided to help you because I didn't want you to suffer once again because of misunderstandings." She pulled Taehyung back to sit on his chair, clasping his hand between her wrinkled ones. "You had to go through so much pain at such a young age - no one deserves that. I was a mere bystander at the time you were arrested, and I regretted it then. I still regret it now." 

She sighed before caressing the back of his hand lovingly, thumb gently pressing on the skin- as if to feel the pain those hands had to go through, and you thought you saw a hint of a tear on his cheeks. "So don't question me for 'saving' you, or something - what you did was perfectly fine for me. I love the way my street looks now, and so do the neighbours. All that really remained was the artist's identity- and now that I know it's you, I don't feel any sort of guilt in justifying what you did." 

You were right. Taehyung was crying. It wasn't silent tears that rained gently down his cheeks, it was a whole thunderstorm. You saw the chief turn away, from the corner of your vision, but you couldn't bring yourself to do the same. He was biting on his bottom lip to hold back any of the sobs or whimpers that came, head lowering to hide the tears. 

Ms. Park simply caressed his hand, over and over, till he calmed down enough to wipe his tears with his free hand. And when he raised his head up, you saw him like a new person. The wound up Taehyung you had met again a few hours ago was slowly vanishing - in his stead, there was a free Taehyung who smiled like the world's burden had been lifted off his shoulders. "Thank you," he murmured. 

The chief sighed again. "I still don't understand how it came to this." 

"Neither do I," Ms. Park laughed. "But it is what it is. We'll pay the fine."

"I'll do it," Taehyung started, only to be shushed by the elder lady. "I want to do it. Let me do it." She turned again to the chief, the bubbly happiness giving way to seriousness. "You can make sure he pays the fine, right? Withdraw the complaints for us too." 

The chief looked at you and nodded, and you got to work - carefully opening the laptop again and making sure that you transferred the report from 'investigation' to 'resolved', and that the complaint was withdrawn. 

The chief, meanwhile, made physical records of it, and informed Taehyung of the fine - which, despite his insistence, Ms. Park paid off, whipping out a cheque she had kept ready, somehow. You added the details to his resolved record as the chief dictated them to you, keeping them for future references - which you hoped would only be needed to prove his innocence in any situation. 

Nearly twenty minutes of details, questioning, and a written assurance from Taehyung that he would be liable to arrest if he continued illegal activities, it was done. Taehyung was free. 

The chief read over the details once again, thoroughly, eyes getting heavier and softer with every document he checked. Once it was all done, filed, and you had stacked the records back in the drawers they were placed in, the chief sagged into the chair, hands clutching the steel arms for support. 

"Thank God," he whispered, eyes closed. "You're fine now." He got up shakily, hands wiping at his eyes to erase any traces of the tears that had possibly leaked out. He walked around the table, reaching for Taehyung - as if beyond the lines of that desk, his duties as an officer stopped and those as a teacher resumed. "Don't you dare do that again, Taehyung. Never again." He held his student by the shoulder tightly, gripping him and shaking him a little - like a parent would scold a kid. "Live a good life, please." 

Taehyung nodded frantically, eyes still wide in disbelief as he ignored the grubby tear streaks on his face. "I will, sir." He had his hands placed politely in front of him, trembling fingers clutching onto the rough denim fabric of the old, loose jeans you had made him wear. 

"Live well," the chief repeated again, thumping Taehyung's shoulder once and then turning around to collect the documents he would need to take with him. He bowed to Ms. Park, who acknowledged him before something at a corner of the small office caught her eye, and turned sharply to you. "Officer Y/N," he began, and you tensed a little bit more. "There was an opening last night in the forensic science department that I got notice of," he said, a smile tugging on the edges of his lips when he saw how your demeanor brightened. "Reach the head office tomorrow in the morning at ten, and I'll give you the details. All the best." 

You hastily held back the sudden smile that threatened to split on your face, smartly saluting your senior before he turned around to leave the office. As he opened the door, you felt a burst of warmth all over your body - the heat of the sunshine rushing into the room. 

Ms. Park walked from her corner to Taehyung, taking his palm between hers and squeezing. "I'm happy that you're free now, Taehyung." She looked carefully at his face - sternness making way for soft concern, and said, "Live wisely. If you need money, or a job to get you started, come to my shop - it's the one you painted with orchids. You remember it, right?" 

Taehyung responded with a rather choked 'yes', nodding his head frantically. He placed his other, trembling hand upon the lady's hands, and solemnly thanked her. 

"That's not needed, I told you." She smiled, before patting his cheek. "You deserve to let yourself live, so use this chance well. Work hard." She turned her head to look through the window behind her, groaning a bit at the sight of the brightly burning sun. "I better leave now - it seems that I'll end up getting a sunburn the nearer to twelve it is." She turned back to Taehyung, smiling softly, and patting his cheek. "Turn up at the shop tomorrow morning, we'll figure something out." 

"Oh, and officer?" she faced you, pointing in the corner where she was standing a few moments before. "I think my grandson had left his plushie over here a few days ago - it's this one, right?" You followed where her hand was pointing, finding a pumpkin plushie left casually on top of a table. "Sungwoo told me he had lost it some time ago, so I just thought it was this one," she laughed awkwardly. 

"I think it is his, he had come yesterday to file a missing complaint for it too," you said, causing Ms. Park to laugh. "He really loves it, doesn't he?" 

"He's not slept well since it went missing. Anyways, I better take it with me, if that's all."

"Just a moment, ma'am," you stopped her hastily. "He'd left a note for the plushie too - I believe Peter?" 

The elderly woman laughed at her grandson's antics, taking the note you offered her and grinning as she read it. "Yes, yes, Peter. I'll take the note with me. Thank you so much for everything, officer."

Thank you, you wish to say - unable to understand how she volunteered to be an eyewitness and defend the one person you cared so much for. Maybe words wouldn't be enough for you to convey how grateful you were to her, so you simply bowed to the woman. 

She took Taehyung's hand again, gently pressing on the back of his hand. "Your mother used to help me out in the shop, you know." Taehyung nodded, and she smiled. "Your hands are like hers. Delicate, yet strong. You can craft beauty with this hand, Taehyung." She squeezed his hand, smiling. "Don't just let that beauty slip away from you." 

She patted his hand again, before turning to you and smiling, and heading out. The sunlight bounced off her gray hair to shine on Taehyung as you looked at him - even with a tired expression, he looked more alive than you had seen him in the last few hours. 

"I'm free," he said, saying it aloud and letting himself feel the sensation for a few moments. 

He turned to you, watching the way your eyes told him that you understood everything you wanted to tell him - even the things he himself didn't understand. "I'm free, Y/N," he repeated, carefully examining his wrists that were once bound with handcuffs - no. There were no restraints there. 

His eyes panned around the room. There was no investigator who questioned him about why he simply couldn't admit his crime. No one who made fun of him for seeking comfort in his art - even if it was illegal. "I'm really free," he murmured again.

Taehyung leaped towards you, pulling you close and holding you tight, as if unable to believe that you were there with him: and that he was here with you for as long as he wanted to be. You let your arms circle around his neck, one curling through the hair at his nape and pulling him further into your embrace, and the other spread out over his back - trying to remind yourself that yes, he was here, with you. 

"Thank you," you felt him murmur into your shoulder. 

"For what?"

"Just being here. With me." He sighed, further tightening the hands that rested around your waist. "After so many unfamiliar faces over the years, seeing yours feels like a reward of sorts for behaving well." 

You laughed at him, slapping his back light heartedly. "Don't talk like you did anything wrong all those years ago. It's not good." You let your hands pane across the expanse of his skin, feeling him cling on to you as you tried to calm him down. "I'm happy for you, Tae." 

He held you like that, for a few more moments - like you were slowly pulling him back into what could be his new normal life. Waking up every day in a room that doesn't have steel bars as a door. Not having to crash at the old house that had haunted him for years. Not having to hide his face in the fear that someone would taunt him for his past. Actually doing something that made him feel happy, confident, and alive. 

"I'm happy too," he murmured into your shoulder. You hummed as he looked beyond your frame to see the streets outside the window - seeing how they were illuminated in daylight. How animatedly people were talking about what their plans for the day were. A kid kept hopping on a chalk drawing of hopscotch he had drawn on the footpath, clutching onto a plushie that oddly seemed like a pumpkin. Someone walked around their stall, setting things up for the day. 

You pulled him away from your grip to look at him again - not wanting to forget any part of him in any way. "I still care for you as much as I did all those years ago, you know." You put your hands on his biceps, just as you used to do when you had to knock sense into your friend. "You better not hide anything from me now." 

"I have no intentions of," he grinned. "Thank you very much." 

You giggled, a feeling you hadn't felt in years fluttering around your stomach like butterflies. 

"About us," Taehyung began, holding your hands in his, "You know that I love you, right?" You felt yourself tense up, and probably Taehyung did too, as he squeezed your hands. "I'm not in any hurry. I want to take some time to understand myself and what I want to do before I think of anything with you. But when I'm settled, and I'm someone I can be proud of, I want to come back to you. Be with you forever." He let go of your hands to hold your cheeks, smiling as he saw your big eyes peer at him. "You'll let me, right?" 

Your eyes softened. "Of course, Taehyung."

"Tae." He corrected you, coming closer to press a kiss on your forehead. 

You smiled when he moved back, glancing down at all of him and laughing. "For beginners, how about we get you clothes to change into?" 

He looked down at his clothes, laughing with you. "Let's go, then?" 

You nodded at him, pulling him out of the office, and locking it securely before turning to a widely grinning Taehyung. "I have a feeling I'm going to love the daytime. It's just so positive, and nice, don't you think? Really warm all over." 

"You're just saying that because you lived like a night owl," you laughed at him, watching his eyes sparkle in the sunshine. 

"Yeah, that wasn't the best way to live, was it?" He clicked his tongue and frowned. "Guess I better start living well now. To new beginnings, then, Officer!!" He grinned and poked your forehead. 

You watched Taehyung skip over the pebbles that were lined outside the office, walking freely on the streets, feeling the dread that you had let build up in your heart for so long slowly drain out of you. "Wait for me!" You screamed behind him, running to catch up to him. To new beginnings, you thought. 

a/n: hopefully, this piece of writing was worth your time 😊 thank you so much for reading graffiti and chalk!! I'd love to hear any feedback you have. Feel free to send it in as a comment, reblog, or as an ask! love, hazel 💞

taglist: @taejinnies (the torture is over bahaha), @xiaokoo, @thedarkwinterrose, @shatzkrinslinzki

masterlist

[discet]

Hey again! I was curious about a couple things. 1.Is Marcy Autistic in your AU? Cause well, the whole fiasco revolving the is she/is she not autistic in canon is... tiring as a person with Autism, and having my favorite AU incarnation of Marcy be Autistic would be real cool. 2.What are your general thoughts on how canon handled Marcy's arc? Because I'm curious how closely AWIW will follow it. While I get they were really trying to push the whole change message, it seems like they do so in favor of ignoring a lot of Marcy's very real trauma and hurt, and so watching them put her back in a situation she was so clearly terrified of was... uncomfortable. Specifically in regards to returning to her parents. Because like, they kinda brush over the fact that Marcy, as opposed to Anne and Sasha, actually ran away from home, and usually happy, well cared for children don't tend to do that. Plus everything in regards to the indicators of her parents being at best neglectful (her considering being alone with them as still alone, the desire to live in Amphibia, her immediate attachment to Andrias) makes it feel like maybe they didn't fully think through Marcy's story end point while writing her, and just kinda threw in the line of 'can you call our parents' to be like "see? Marcy does want to go back to her parents, so they've definitely been nothing but good people this entire time, despite the fact that they dropped the bombshell of moving on Marcy's childhood best friend's actual birthday". And with you leaning into the whole "Marcy's parents aren't very good", I guess I was just, idk, pretty worried about the potential for Marcy to wind up in the same situation as canon, isolated for ten or so years with no decent adults in her life that we know of.

Hello again! Analysis and spoilers down below

1.Is Marcy Autistic 

So I hate to answer like this cause it sounds like a cop-out, but Maybe?? Marcy's characterization in the AU is partially details I picked up for the show, partly things I inferred from the show, with maybe a few traits from myself to round her out a bit. I am not diagnosed one way or the other. But there have been a number of times I've read or heard autistic people/friends talk about their experience and thought to myself, 'Oh that's relatable'. So I might have written her as such on accident 

As much as I would love to enthusiastically say, 'Yes!' to your question, my deep fear is that I am going to have Marcy do something/somethings that are atypical for an Autistic person to do. Then you and anyone who would take comfort in my confirmation at this moment, would then be disappointed by my inability to follow through down the line.

So I'm sorry that this is a wishy washy answer, but the honest one is this: I did not intend to write her as autistic. If she reads like that, awesome, I have no issues with that reading. I am not confirming for fear of disappointing people later if I am incapable of follow-through.

2a. How do I feel Marcy’s Arc was handled in canon?

I think we’re mostly in agreement here. There’s a lot of baggage from True Colors that the creators just kind of... pretend isn’t there for season 3? I wouldn’t be surprised if executive meddling kept them from really dealing with it. 

The fact that no one brings up Marcy through most of Season 3 is always going to be a thorn in my side. Marcy’s last 3 actions Marcy takes in Season 2 are 

1. Save Sprigs life. Sprig nor Anne ever bring this up again. 

2. Manage to open a portal and save Anne and the Plantars, even though this put a target on her back and led to her being

3. Impaled through the chest. Her last words being a desperate apology for her mistakes

No one ever brings this up after true colors. This is not a moment of grief before they are going on silly adventures on Earth. Note: I like the silly adventures on Earth, I think those are good episodes, but they do absolutely squander the narrative momentum of True Colors. 

I’ve read analysis that says Anne’s desperation to get the Plantars back to Amphibia was really subtext about getting back to her friends. Which I think is a fine reading, and maybe the intent, but I really wish they had put that on the page. I wouldn’t need much. It could have been Sprig asking in one of their late night chats ‘Hey do you really think Marcy is alright?’ and Anne hesitating for juuuuust a moment before answering‘Yeah, of course dude.’ Just to put that on the actual page. Just an emotional stinger at the end like we got back in S2 with Hopping Mall

Sasha is stuck in Amphibia but seems to make no effort or plans to try and rescue Marcy on her own, even though she has no idea if Anne could get back. Again a throw away line of ‘I’ve looked into ways to save Marcy, but we just don’t have the resources’ would have been enough to establish that yeah, Sasha was worried about Marcy and they really need to gather allies so we can help her.

I’ve written before about the main thing you asked about vis a vis Marcy’s parents here. So yeah, the little ‘hey, let our parents know we’re good‘ did ring a little hollow for me too. Kind of a cop out. 

2B. Am I going to follow the same path as canon with AWIW?

No. Like usually I don’t super confirm or deny things like this but no. The ending I have sketched out currently is very different from canon, and if there is a grand moral to be learned, its not that change is a natural part of life we need to embrace it. 

I think that is a fine lesson mind you, but canon already did it, and I have my own story to tell. 

Note: I don’t know if its necessarily going to be better, its gonna be rough, but I think it is a happy ending for everyone