#im holding off on posting the notes so far bc once I do

[saetoru]

AGE IS NOTHING BUT A NUMBER — GETO SUGURU.

kinktober day two — overstimulation ; find masterlist here

synopsis. befriending nanako and mimiko has its perks—like fucking their father, for example. suguru might have aged over the years, but that doesn't mean he's lost his touch. don't believe him? that's okay—he can always just show you instead

length. 5.3k words (bro this fic was agonizing)

contents. minors do not interact, fem! reader, dilf! suguru, college au (reader is a student), age gaps (20+ difference), jealous suguru, teasing, cunnilingus, fingering, edging, nipple play, unprotected sex, multiple orgasms, overstimulation, creampie, pet names (baby, sweetheart, princess, angel)

notes. this took me so long bc i hate it so im posting it and running away to play genshin to slave away for primos

most people can tell their best friends everything. not you, though—you have a secret. a dirty, shameful, horrible little secret, in fact.

no one knows that every chance you get, every small little moment you can possibly squeeze in, you fuck your two best friends’ father—and it’s going to stay that way, unknown and forever hidden. suguru is young as far as parents go, just barely in his twenties when he’s found himself a single father of two, but that doesn’t mean he’s not too old for you. and it especially doesn’t mean that it’s not inappropriate to fuck the man that raised your two closest friends.

you meet nanako and mimiko during your freshman year of college—the rest is history. the first time you spend the night at their place, suguru (he insists you call him that on your first meeting) is overjoyed that his girls have someone as lovely as you.

who wouldn’t be? you’re smart, well-mannered, respectable, and incredibly studious. what a perfect role model for his girls—after all, every father’s worst nightmare is his sweet, precious daughters venturing off to the real world. men are dogs—suguru should know. they’re sleazy and prey on young women who are naive and unsuspecting, taking advantage of their hopefulness before completely destroying their innocence. suguru can’t bear the idea of his perfect little girls becoming victims of such sinister behavior—but that’s all quelled when he meets you.

but he never thought, not even for one second, that he’d become one of those men.

those older men who fuck girls half their age—the girls that are barely in their twenties and still don’t even really understand how taxes work. the girls that have just started to learn how to hold their alcohol and can only recently buy it legally. the girls who don’t realize how complicated adulthood can be, just barely spreading their wings and learning what it’s like to be free.

suguru has always found those men deplorable. they’re the awful, disgusting, untamed vermin of society—women must be protected from them at all costs.

but now? well….now he’s one of them—and he finds, even as disgusted with himself as he is from time to time, he has little regrets.

not when you’re sprawled under him, hands tracing over his bare chest, feeling the soft skin under your palms in wonder. suguru, though he’s not let himself go by any means, is past his prime—he still frequents the gym, and he has more time to go now that the girls are gone most of the day, but he’s not immune to the effects of aging.

his hair has more than a few strands of white sprinkled in now; nanako makes sure to remind him not to pull them out unless he wants more. he’s still managed to keep the abs he was once so proud of in his youth, but they’re still not as hard—layered over a slight belly that he can’t seem to get rid of no matter what he tries. his skin is a bit looser, and his eyes have slight wrinkles in the corners of them, but despite it all, suguru still looks as handsome as ever.

he’s aged well, still looks remarkably young for men his age, and still looks like that dashing young man he once was who stole hearts. in fact, he still hears about his looks, especially from nanako and mimiko’s friends—he’s always chuckled to himself and shook his head in amusement.

that’s your dad? god, he’s so hot.

what? he’s single? oh my gosh, do you need a mom?

i can’t believe he’s never been married—women in his generation don’t deserve him. i’ll take him off their hands.

wait, do you have pictures of him when he was younger?

oh my god, he’s so fine. are you sure he’s in his forties?

nanako and mimiko, bless their hearts, have always crinkled their noses at the…less than proper comments they’ve had to witness about their father. in fact, they’ve watched teachers practically throw themselves onto suguru at parent-teacher conferences. it’s bothersome—a little disturbing to hear their friends talk about all the things they’d let their dad, of all people, do to them.

but you? you don’t make unhinged comments. they appreciate that.

but if only they knew…

if only they knew that sometimes, like right now, when you’re spending the night, you don’t actually sleep—instead, you sneak off to their father’s room, lay on his mattress under his body, and feel his touch. you can feel him, hard and throbbing in his sweats as his clothed cock presses against your thigh—but he takes his time with you, and doesn’t do anything about the clear arousal pooling between your legs just yet. 

instead, he focuses on remembering your body—it’s been a while, after all. he hasn’t felt your hips, hasn’t tasted your skin, hasn’t heard your voice. 

“missed you,” suguru breathes, hovering over you as you hum, nipping at your skin as his nose brushes along your neck. your hand is playing with his hair, twisting long, black and white strands along your fingers. “haven’t seen you in a bit, angel.”

“i’ve had midterms,” you murmur.

suguru knows—nanako and mimiko have been studying for them themselves. he’s more than a little disappointed that you haven’t come over to study with them yet. but then, just the other night, mimiko mentions you’ve been spending your time with a boy at the library, sharing a table as you lean over his shoulder to look at his laptop. nanako giggles that you might have finally gotten yourself a boyfriend. mimiko hums and nods as she murmurs it’s about time.

suguru swallows down every bite of dinner with an aftertaste of bile that night.

a boy—a boy? you’ve been skipping coming over to study with the girls (and, by default, seeing him) just to study with some boy? what’s got your attention on the guy so badly? why would you break the routine you’ve had for the last few semesters for someone you just recently met? have you finally started to realize that this is a mistake? is suguru a mistake?

he thinks maybe not, now that you’re back in his bed—but he still has too many unanswered questions. 

“so i’ve heard,” he says lowly, “i’ve also heard there’s a certain boy on your radar.” he smiles bitterly, pulling away from your neck to stare at you with those dark, sharp eyes of his. “a much younger, and fitting match for you, i suppose.”

you roll your eyes, snorting.

“is that what nanako and mimiko have told you? honestly, those two,” you huff fondly, “i told them already. he’s just my partner for a presentation. we’re practicing.”

“oh?” suguru raises a brow—and then he shivers lightly when you lean up and kiss his jaw, eyes fluttering shut at your touch.

“yes,” you giggle, “no need to be jealous of someone half your age, you know.”

“that’s exactly why i’m jealous,” he breathes, leaning in to kiss you softly.

your lips taste like honey—probably sweeter, in fact. they drip with that decadent, saccharine taste of youth. he feels twenty again every time he kisses you, feels not a day older than his glory days.

“oh, you poor thing,” you grin, cupping his face as you scatter kisses along his cheeks and nose, thumb tracing the skin. fuck, is this what it feels like to be in love? it makes him feel so young, so free, and hopeful for the future. when was the last time he felt this way? “have you been losing sleep over my nonexistent college boyfriend?”

“well, kids your age fool around quite a bit,” he says in that father tone that he uses on nanako and mimiko, “what was i supposed to think?”

you’ve heard that tone so many times before; the one where he talks like he knows better, like he’s wiser, like he’s aware of something you’re not. 

girls, make sure you share your location with me—i need to find you in case anything happens. it’s for your own safety, end of discussion.

make sure you watch over your drinks, okay? men these days take every chance they get to spike them when you’re not looking. mimiko, i was your age once, too. i’ve seen this happen plenty.

don’t walk alone in the streets at night. call me. i’ll pick you up—no, nanako, it’s not lame. the streets are dangerous at night. there are creeps, you know.

don’t get into any boy’s cars, girls. you never know what’ll happen; one mistake is all it takes to ruin your life—hey, don’t roll your eyes at me. one day, you’ll understand i’m right.

“i’m not a kid,” you pout, and then, smugly this time, you wiggle your brows. “did’ya lose sleep over my imaginary boyfriend? you need plenty of sleep at your age, y’know.”

“no, you’re not a kid,” suguru agrees, “you’re a brat.” and then he’s back to pressing those hot, open-mouthed, hungry kisses along your jaw, humming in delight when you angle your head to give him better access. 

sometimes, it’s fun to get under suguru’s skin—it’s fun to break that carefully built, mature patience of his, pulling a twitch of his eye and a furrow of his brow from him. so, you grin widely as you murmur, “who knows? maybe he’d fuck better—more stamina, y’know?”

it’s supposed to just tease him, to make him glare at you unimpressed so you can giggle and kiss between his brows—but suguru stills at that, painfully stiff for a moment before he bites at your skin. hard. 

“oh yeah?” he hisses, his voice low and dangerous as he pulls away to glare down at you, “you think so? what, you think an old man like me can’t fuck you long enough?”

you don’t get a chance to reply—not before he pulls your pants down your waist to reveal your soaked panties, pulling a hum from him as he grins at the damp patch of fabric. his fingers circle over your clit for a moment, right over the cloth, making your breath hitch as you buck into his touch. 

“suguru—”

“look at that,” he chuckles, “wearing my favorite one, huh? can’t fuck you that bad if you try your best to impress me. isn’t that what you wanted? is that what you were thinking when you put these on before coming over? how precious,” he murmurs—he speaks so condescending, so knowingly, as if he’s read your mind just by looking at the red lace covering your dripping cunt. you cover your face in humiliation, but he grabs your wrists and pins them over your head, clicking his teeth in disapproval. 

part of you knows you should quit while you can—the other part? well…it wants to test the limits a bit longer. suguru has never been so easy to rile up, you want to indulge in it for just a bit longer if you can help it. 

“well,” you huff, “what’re you waiting for, then? don’t tell me the age has slowed you down—”

“you really don’t know when to quit, do you?” he says in a low snarl, “fine, you want me to hurry up? you got it, princess.”

it all happens before you can even register—one moment, you’re grinning at him with mischief in your eyes; the next second, he has you in nothing but your bra, bare in his bed as he pulls your legs apart and leans close to your pussy.

“you know the thing about guys your age,” he hums, toying with your clit lazily as you gasp with a twitch, “is that they really don’t know how to take care of anyone but themselves. guess they just don’t have enough experience to really figure it out.”

his lips latch onto your clit, sucking before he rolls his tongue over the sensitive bud as his fingers sink into your core, pushing past your folds and stretching you open. it’s slow—deliberately so, in fact. it makes your head spin, and your fingers curl into the bed sheets as you pant. 

“suguru, m-more—”

“don’t worry,” he coos, pulling away from you to grin up at your glossy eyes, “you’ll get plenty, baby. we’ll see if you’ve got the stamina. y’know, since you’re so young.”

his lips are back to wrap around your clit, fingers sinking and curling exactly where you’re most sensitive—suguru finds your sweet spots instantly the first time he has you sprawled under him. didn’t even take a moment of trial, just knew where to touch and kiss to have you unravel in his hold. that much still hasn’t changed—his fingertips press against the sensitive spot in the back of your walls, pulling pretty little whines from you as his tongue flicks over your clit. 

it’s always been a blessing that nanako and mimiko’s room is across the house—had they been closer, they might hear the mewl you let out as his fingers bully into you faster, unforgiving as they brush against your walls and build the ache up between your legs until it’s about to burst. 

“s-suguru, ‘m close, so, so close—”

“already?” he gasps, chuckling as he presses a kiss to your clit with a sly grin, “thought you had more in you than that, baby. so youthful—figured you’d last a bit longer.”

he’s mean about it—rubs it in your face some more that you’re so close so fast before he pulls his fingers away and doesn’t even give you the satisfaction of falling apart on his digits. it makes you sob, hips bucking up to chase the friction of his fingers, but he’s already gone, leaving your walls empty and fluttering around nothing.

“no,” your voice breaks, “n-no, so close, please. i want—”

“that’s what he would’ve done,” suguru hums, “pulled out before you even finished. that’s what guys your age always do—they don’t know how to make girls finish. you ever had that problem with me?”

“no,” you say quickly, shaking your head. you’re a pretty little thing, he thinks—pouty, wobbly lips and those glossy eyes as you sniffle. “no, you always make me cum—please, i wanna cum, sugu.”

“yeah?” he pouts with faux sympathy, “didn’t feel good, huh? feels better when i take care of you, doesn’t it?”

“uh huh,” you nod—you’re still panting through the aftershocks of having your orgasm ripped from you, chest rising and falling harsh enough that it fills him with pride he can pull such drastic reactions from you. no one knows your body like suguru—he’s too good at giving it what it wants for anyone else to compare. 

“think that boy—” he spits the last word like it’s poison on his tongue, “—can take care of you?”

“no,” you whimper, “no, he can’t. not like you, never like you.”

“that’s a good girl,” he nods approvingly, rubbing his slick-coated finger over your clit, toying with it teasingly as you writhe, whining for more. “you know something else about men your age? they don’t care to please a woman—don’t bother to appreciate them enough to make them feel good. you think that boy would be here—” he pauses to motion between your legs, where he’s currently situated, “—willingly? taste you willingly? let you cum on his tongue willingly?”

“i-i don’t…i never asked someone to—”

“did you ever ask me?” he interrupts, raising a brow at you, “you ever have to ask me? i just do it. wanna know why? because i know what i’m doing—know how to treat you right, how to give you what you need. isn’t that right?” 

“yes, yes—you always give me what i want—”

“what you need,” he corrects, “and you know what i think you need right now? this.”

his tongue licks a stripe along your entrances before you can say anything else, pulling a gasp out of you as your hands find his hair and tug—suguru groans at that, feels his pants get impossibly tighter as the aching erection he sports throbs between his legs at the way you pull at the strands so desperately, so needy. for him. only ever him. 

his tongue fucks into you, messy with the way he devours you, the slick arousal pooling from your cunt coating his lips, his cheeks, his chin. you moan—and really, it’s almost a squeal—when his fingers are sinking back into you, tongue flicking away at your clit mercilessly as he thrusts his digits in and out of your pussy. you’re close, painfully so, the pressure steadily building and building until you just can’t hold it back anymore. 

“sugu—’m c-cumming. god ‘s so good—feels good,” you babble, thighs closing around his head as his fingers curl into your sweet spot over and over again, not stopping for even a second as he helps you ride out your high. your walls spasm around his fingers, tight as they flutter around him and make him groan at the thought of being inside you. 

he watches, hungry and in awe, as your back arches off the mattress and your mouth parts, broken little wails of his name rolling off your tongue in a sweet melody. 

“i bet he’s never seen someone look like this,” suguru murmurs, watching the way the ecstasy takes over your features as your face falls slack from pleasure, “so pretty when falling apart. bet he’d never even get close to making you look so fucked from just his tongue.”

your orgasm ripples through you—it’s not new, the way he makes you feel so good, but it’s definitely nothing to get used to either. your body slumps back onto the mattress as you finish, panting harshly while he climbs up to hover over you once again. 

“that felt good?” he asks, nosing at your cheek as you nod breathlessly.

“yeah,” you breathe, wrapping your arms around his neck. 

“hope you’re not tired out just yet,” he says smugly, eyeing the way sweat clings to your forehead and huffs of air exhale from your lungs with each labored breath, “because we’re nowhere near done, baby. not even close.”

just like that, your bra is unclasped and pulled off, freeing your tits for his mouth to latch onto a nipple, sucking and lightly grazing his teeth along the bud while his fingers tease at the other, pinching and rubbing over it with his thumb. you whine, eyes squeezing shut as your hand cups the back of his head and keeps him in place. 

“bet i could make you cum just from this,” he says with a laugh, “i don’t even need to fuck you.”

“please,” you dig your nails into his shoulder, moaning as he switches to wrap his lips around the other nipple, “please, sugu—n-need more.”

“be more specific,” he says lowly, looking up at you in amusement, “gonna need more than that, princess. you gotta help me out here—i’m afraid i don’t know what i’m doing.”

suguru is doing everything he can to drag this out—if you’d known one small comment would have him riled up like this…well, truthfully, you can’t say you wouldn’t have made it anyway. it’s exciting in its own right when he’s so determined to show you why you need him, why no one else but him is meant to see you like this, make you fall apart like this, have you sprawled under them like this. 

no one can know about you and suguru—not nanako and mimiko, not your other friends, not your family. you know what they’d say, how they’d feel. 

disgust—shame, even. he’s far too old for you, you know they’d say; he’s a red flag for getting with someone so young. no one can know that you come here, dead in the middle of the night when your friends are asleep, and fuck their father. not only that—lay with their father, talk about your hopes and dreams for the future with their father, giggle as you gossip with their father, fall in love with their father. 

something tells you the feeling is not unreciprocated—that suguru feels the same, that he loves holding you in his arms just as much as you love laying in them. maybe it wasn’t a joke, what you’d said. not to him, at least—maybe deep down, it stung; maybe he had something to prove. that boy might be closer to you in age, but he’ll never, ever treat you the way suguru does—no one will, for that matter. perhaps he has to show it so you really know. 

so you look him in the eye, pull him closer until his forehead is pressed against yours and you can press a delicate kiss to his lips before you murmur against them, “fuck me, suguru. please—need you.”

he groans at that, closes his eyes before his hips move to press the thick tip of his cock against your folds, dragging it along your entrance as he coats his head with your slick. it’s flushed a deep pink—it’s been neglected for so long that he shudders at the way it aches, at the way even the slightest friction along the sensitive tip pulls a soft gasp from him. 

for a moment, he wonders if he really will last long enough to fuck you properly—he might not, with the way your walls always squeeze around him, always have him ready to fuck his load into you just as soon as he’s inside you. the thought alone almost makes his cock twitch—but suguru is a man of patience, so he slowly pushes into you, inch by inch, looking down and watching as his girth disappears inside you. 

“look at that,” he coos, grinning wide as he looks back up at you, “took me so easily. ‘s cause when you do it right, it doesn’t take much, does it?”

“f-fuck—” your head presses back against the pillow, mouth hung open as you breathe heavily, trying to squirm and get even the slightest bit of friction from him as he stays painfully still. “move, suguru—please, c-can’t wait anymore. jus’ wanna feel you.”

“i know,” he chuckles, “patience is a virtue, sweetheart.”

despite it all, suguru is not feeling very patient anymore—it’s been long enough. his hips roll slowly at first, a shallow thrust of his hips that makes you both moan lowly before he all but pulls out and slams back in, hard. you can feel the burning stretch of his girth practically splitting you open, every thick vein dragging along your cunt and every brush of his tip against the back of your walls. it’s loud—the sound of skin slapping against skin, the sound of his deep groans and your breathless whines, the sound of the headboard hitting the wall as he fucks you into his mattress. 

“god—fuck, suguru—th-there,” you mewl as he slams into you right where you need him. 

you’ve lost count of how many times suguru has fucked you like you’re his. in his bed at night, in his shower in the mornings, on the couch when you drop by when the girls aren’t home, in his car that one time he drove you home when it rained, in your apartment that one time he dropped off your laptop because you forgot it. there’s one common denominator—the way he makes you feel, not just from the way his cock ruts into you, but from the way his fingers tangle with yours, from the way his mouth finds your jaw to kiss, from the way his forehead presses into your shoulder with warmth. 

it’s exciting, maybe. at first, it’s scandalous and a little thrilling in its own right. by now, it’s something much more than that—you don’t think anyone could make you feel the way he does, fuck you like he does, even if they tried. even if they knew where to touch and where to kiss. even if they knew what you liked and what you didn’t. 

they couldn’t be suguru—would never be suguru. 

“there, huh?” he pants, moaning softly as he feels your walls flutter around him tightly, “i know. i know how to fuck this pussy—my pussy. you think some boy you hardly know would know? think he’d care to learn? think he’d even try?”

“no,” you gasp, shaking your head as your hips buck up to meet his sharp thrusts, “no. no one would make me feel this good. make me feel so good, sugu.”

“ngh—sh-shit,” he hisses at your words, cock almost swelling harder at the way you praise him, at the way your words are almost slurred with no real thought behind him. it’s a little pride-inducing, the way you’re still able to sing his praises without having to really think about it first. he can hear it, the way you’re lost in the drag of his cock, drunk in the haze of pleasure, unfocused on everything else besides the way he bullies his thick girth into your abused cunt.

it’s a mess, it’s filthy the way there’s a mix of pre cum and your slick at the base of his cock, along your inner thighs, coating your skin as the squelching sound of him nudging past your folds fills the room.

it’s good, the way he makes you feel—he can hear it in your voice as you wail his name.

“s-suguru—oh.”

“what, you gettin’ all fucked out on me? ‘m not even close yet, princess,” he hums, leaning down to kiss your neck as he sucks softly into your sweet spot. you throw your head back, rasping out a cry of his name again as his balls slap against your ass with a harsh roll of his hips. 

and then his hand makes its way between your bodies, thumb attaching itself to your clit before rubbing punishing circles into the bundle of nerves—you sob at that, back arching up as your chest presses against his, nipples hard as they brush along his skin.

“s-sugu—close, ‘m gonna cum a-again—so close,” you pant brokenly, every sentence cut off with a sharp gasp as he thrusts into you. 

you’re close—you can’t fight back the way the coil in your belly snaps as he teases your clit. it’s still sensitive from the last orgasm, every nerve still burning up from before as he gives you more, gives you too much, almost. you cum harder this time—your second high creeping up on you when you least expect it. 

it makes your eyes roll back, makes your thighs quiver, and tears stream down your cheeks as you chant his name over and over. suguru, ‘s so good. suguru, ‘m cumming. suguru, ‘s all for you.

every sentence makes his cock drill into you faster, sloppier in rhythm, maybe, but faster. needier. bordering on desperate. 

“f-fuck, baby,” he grunts, “squeezin’ me so tight—such a tight fuckin’ cunt. you think just anyone deserves this? think you can just walk around and let anyone fuck this? ‘s bullshit—ngh.”

you don’t answer—can’t answer, in fact. it’s all teary eyes and soft sniffles as you mewl with every thrust, voice breaking between every pretty little sound you make. he’s still fucking into you, still dragging his cock against those sensitive walls, still bumping against your clit with his navel, still nudging against your sweet spot with his thick, swollen tip. it’s almost too much—it is too much, making you writhe under his body as you try to form the words. 

“‘s t-too much, sugu—c-can’t anymore,” you try, “can’t.”

“what?” he gasps, furrowing his brows in mock confusion, “you’re tappin’ out on me already? but ‘m not even done yet, sweetheart. haven’t even finished yet—don’t tell me you’re already spent. how will you keep up with your little boyfriend’s stamina if you can’t even take an old man like me?”

“c-can’t take anyone but you,” you sob, “jus’ you—only you. promise.”

“yeah? you swear?”

“uh huh. jus’ you, sugu—don’ want anyone else. won’t fuck me the same.”

“atta girl,” he coos, chuckling as he leans down to kiss your jaw, trailing soft pecks until he meets your lips, “that’s what i thought. make sure you don’t forget, okay?”

“fuck, suguru—’m…g-gonna…”

“gonna what? cum? you’re cumming again?” you nod at that—he grins wide, pride settling into the crinkles of his eyes before his thumb rubs harsh circles into your swollen clit once more. he looks pretty like that—hair framing his face, the mix of black and white strands sticking to the damp skin of his forehead. his skin is flushed, abs flexing as he pants over you. sometimes you feel guilty that half of why you come over to visit nanako and mimiko is to fuck suguru—the guilt is quickly extinguished when you see him like this, bottom lip caught between his teeth as his arms barely hold him over you, eyes shut tight as he groans. 

“i-i’m—fuck, fuck, fuck,” you can’t form sentences anymore as you cum—again. not that you really could before that, but now all you can offer is croaked half-syllables and shaky sobs. your walls squeeze around him, tight as they hug around his throbbing cock. 

it takes one, two, three more sloppy rolls of his hips before he lets out at a low, “baby, fuck—’m gonna fill you up. want that? want me to cum in you? make you mine? always been mine, haven’t you?”

“yes, yes—yours, sugu. yours, yours, yours,” you babble, words slurred between breathy moans and broken sobs. “wanna be yours.”

you can feel him—feel the way his cock twitches in you, the way he grinds into you to ride out his high, the way sticky, hot ropes of cum fill your walls, the way he fucks his load deeper into you with every sloppy thrust of his hips. his arms quiver as he holds himself over you—just barely, though. you can hear the way his voice cracks as he gasps your name over and over, as he mutters lowly about how you’re his, how you’ll always only be his. 

“mine,” he grits, “you’re fuckin’ mine—see how you’re suckin’ me in? see how i fit in this pussy like it was made for me? ‘s cause you’re mine.”

his body slumps onto yours as he finishes, head pressed into the crook of your neck as he kisses the skin while you both catch your breaths. you whimper, still sensitive, as he pulls out of you, a soft chuckle falling past his lips as he pulls his head up to look at you and press a kiss to your cheek. 

“so,” he starts, eyes laced with amusement as he takes in the fucked out look on your face, the tears still drying your cheeks, the swollen flush of your bottom lip, “still think you need someone with more stamina? someone who’ll fuck you better—”

“god,” you groan, slapping his shoulder, “will you drop it already? you got what you wanted, didn’t you?”

“no,” he murmurs, pecking your lips, “still wanna hear it some more.”

“your ego needs a reality check,” you huff as you brush a strand of hair from his forehead, “think i’ve fed it plenty all night.”

“actually, i think you crushed it,” he pouts theatrically, “talking about some asshole who doesn’t care about you right in front of me. after i take such good care of you, too. the girls already think you should date him,” he adds the last part with a slightly bitter roll of his eyes, pulling a giggle out of you.

“they think i don’t know how to talk to men,” you snort, “imagine they knew i was talking to men old enough to be my father.”

“hey,” he clicks his teeth, falling onto the mattress beside you—he pulls you into his chest, letting your cheek rest on his bare skin. it’s so wrong—lying in bed with the father of your best friends. but somehow, suguru feels like the only thing you’ve ever done right. “age is nothing but a number, sweetheart.”

if i have to see the word cock one more time im going to eradicate all humans that have them

do not comment about a part 2 !!!!!!!!!!

[ankiebitez]

Comfort

tags: amon x gn! reader (as far as i know), hurt/comfort kinda, implications of the mcs parents death, implications of amons parents death

note: not beta read, drabble i wrote last night bc i could sleep, probably ooc but oh well. mc is kind of just based on my own feelings so. wrote this bc amons my babygirl, posting bc there should be more for him

you were currently staying in the avisos palace for the next few days, courtesy to bael hoping to lure beelzebub back once again. despite being used as bait, bael was at least kind enough to give you your own room to stay in, though now it wasnt exactly being used.

you dont know what exactly it was, but you couldn't get your brain to shut off so you could rest. your brain was just too full of thoughts that you usually tried to suppress, but as much as you wish they'd dissappear they never seem to. instead deciding to haunt you late at night when there's nothing you can do to push them away.

after getting tired of your restlessness you decided to take a walk through the empty halls of the palace, hoping this would do to clear your mind so you could rest.

unfortunately your thoughts only seemed to echo in time with your footsteps, bouncing off the walls of your brain until it was too much to hold together anymore.

quietly you sat down by one of the windows, cracking it slightly to let the cool air hit your face that felt like it was burning up.

truly you didnt know why you were crying now of all times, you were in hell where tons of devils loved you, but you couldn't help but still feel lonely.

a hard painful lump was in your throat while you tried your best to keep quiet with your sobs and sniffles, not wanting to wake anyone. you wouldn't know how to explain why you're crying, there wasnt really a true reason, sometimes you just need it.

despite your attempts to keep quiet, the sound of foot steps came through the hall to the room you were in.

you quickly tried to wipe your face to hide any traces but there wasnt really a need as a blonde haired demon carefully entered the room.

"oh, its you... you're crying" amon thought aloud almost curiously. he had been on night patrol through the palace, making sure no one had snuck inside or if beelzebub had returned yet.

amon came closer to you by the window, a look of concern on his face. "is something wrong? are you hurt?" he asked, looking over you for any signs of physical harm.

you shook your head a bit embarrassed, though there was no hint of judgment in his eyes. "no im okay i was just having a hard time sleeping and all i guess... i dont even know why im crying its just... stuff from when i was younger and i just..." you trailed off, the painful lump in your throat and watery eyes returning.

you didn't need to finish your sentence though, amon had been told about your past already and he can understand without words how pain from years ago can still hurt just as deeply, how you can feel just as lonely.

"oh... I can keep you company if youd like" amon offered, sitting beside you and offering to hold you.

with a hesitant nod, you let amon pull you close to his chest, placing you on his lap and holding you tightly in his arms, feeling the tears continue to well up in your tired eyes despite the feeling of comfort he gave.

amon didnt let go or push you away, only holding you tighter and letting you cry into his chest as you needed.

he silently understood the way you felt, understanding the need to release pressure on these old feelings sometimes, and even though he cant make the lonely feeling dissappear, he promises to keep you company through them.

[i-write-sin-not-tragedy]

Do you have any headcanons for radiohuskerdust dynamic?

Im so sorry this took so long to reply to i literally let out a screech of joy when i got it and wanted to wait till i was home for the day so i could properly reply LOL

GOD YES I HAVE SOME♡ I HAVE MANY EEE

Overall i view Alastors role here as some flavor of queer platonic— he has the potential to be a caring partner but doesn't care much for romance specifically (yes my aromantic ass is projecting a lil shhhh)

My personal favorite take for them in canon is that eventually over the course of Alastors redemption he does eventually let Husk go— i have. Many feelings on that whole situation too but this is gonna be long already so SJDKEKDK just know i see them eventually getting to a point where they accept that neither of them are perfect and can let things go. Alastor considers Husk a very dear friend, and does in fact hold a high amount of respect for him, and Husk feels the same (although hes a little more Tsundere about it sksksksk)

Angel is very much so the glue that holds this ot3 together LOL

Like i think both Husk and Alastor fall for him first and through Angel find a way to actually communicate over the strange mix of feelings they've had with each other. Angels good at reading other people, he can tell they have *something* going on and isn't afraid to point it out.

I constantly see people making Angel hate Alastor but sorry no i do not agree at all.

Despite the initial impressions of each other, Alastor and Angel would be FANTASTIC friends. Once Alastor understands that Angels humor is just that, humor, hes not actually expecting anything from Al, he starts meeting Angel halfway on his jokes, adding onto them. Once they start to realize they can bounce off each other and actually bond oh god its OVER.

Alastor finds Angel actually very charming to be around, and Angel realizes Alastor isn't a prude or anything he just has some firm walls up.

God they'd be INSUFFERABLE together

You know that post thats like "i ship this ship but like specifically as a comedy duo" yeah thats radiodust in my heart LOL

They'd be the bane of Husks existence together.

Also Alastor is capable of being a huge gentleman and i can see him treating Angel to fancy dinners and "Dates". Alastor has no care for romance but he knows how to treat someone well and Angel basks in the attention.

They'd just VIBE so well!! Maybe its bc i spent years watching the hunniecast streams but god i think Radiodust make such a fun duo. If they put their heads together they can be a menace to society.

Alastor also gives off cheek/hand kiss vibes. He would do that shit and Angel is a sucker for it (both Husk and Alastor would treat him so well okay spider boy deserves it)

Husk and Angel have the most "Romantic" dynamic of the three ofc, and Alastor is happy to spend their date nights off doing his own thing. Huskerdusts dynamic is pretty much exactly as canon— i don't have many notes to add to it i Genuinely love how canon is handling them so far.

I won't dive off into nsfw here kwkfkwkd but i DO have thoughts on how that would work in this lineup.

I will say overall i see Angel as hypersexual, Husk as Demi, and Alastor as a sex neutral-Ace.

Like he just doesn't GET it but he can find some compromises if one of his partners askes.

[mylarena]

i dont see enough soulmate aus so. inspired by this post by @hyperfixationwizard, soulmate au where drawings and ink on skin show up on ur soulmates skin (not scars bc there would be so fucking much going on with that and im not gonna write abt itdgthfgh)

anyways. soap has always love doodling- with anything. pencil, pen, crayon, marker, whatever he could get his hands on. he’d doodle on anything and everything. the walls (when he was a kid, mainly), paper, cardboard, desks in school, napkins... but by far, his favorite was to draw on his own skin. the thought of his work showing up on someone else, someone he was practically made for and they for him- something that they could share, something that they could keep secret and hold close to their chests- it was enough to make him giddy.

so, he doodled. a pretty flower he saw on his walk to school, curling around his wrist. a bird perched on the bench across from him at the park, taking flight on the back of his hand. the stray cat that hung out on his porch, draped across his thigh. sometimes if he didnt have a notebook with him, messy schematics and notes for devices- no, ma, thats not an explosive, he swears- scrawled on his forearm.

he never sees anything from his soulmate- he checks every single day for any new marks, any words, but he never finds any. still, he keeps drawing. it doesnt usually get to him, the fact that his soulmate doesnt give him responses, but sometimes he cant help but think too much. he wonders if his soulmate likes the drawings, which leads to the thought of them not liking them, or finding them annoying, or if they think theyre bad.

one day, he caves under his thoughts and writes his first question to his soulmate, right under a bundle of primroses- “do you want me to stop?”

he waits anxiously for hours, not knowing if he’ll be able to feel the reply, or if he has to look for it, or if there even will be one-

then he feels it- a sort of pins-and-needles sensation on his left arm. he frantically rolls up his sleeve and his eyes are immediately drawn to the letters that appear on his skin. once the writing stops, he stares with wide eyes at the single word left behind- shaky, smudged, and a bit runny in some spots-

“no.”

and so he doesnt stop.

he keeps drawing, slowly moving from small little doodles of primroses on his arms and songbirds on his hands to sprawling meadows that wrap around his forearms and ravens spreading their wings across his thighs. sometimes he adds words- always short encouragements, positive quotes, or funny thoughts he has. he never gets responses, but he knows that his soulmate is still around by the occasional ink smudge that appears. anytime one appears, he incorporates them into a drawing. sometimes its a silly little doodle, and other times he spends hours creating beautiful, complex landscapes centered around them.

for years, his soulmate holds their silence. soap doesnt mind. he knows that they appreciate his art and words. at least, thats the thought he holds onto. he never holds it against his soulmate- the whole not-responding thing. hes well aware that he can be a lot to handle; hes heard it constantly from the majority of the people in his life. he just hopes that maybe his soulmate can tolerate him more than most.

he was 14 when things changed.

he had gotten home from school, completely ignoring his parents in the kitchen and opting to power walk to his room. it had been a shitty day; he had overslept and missed the bus, causing him to be late to class, and then some dickwads from the year above him decided that he was a good target to snag lunch money from, (really? stealing a kids lunch money? why would they pick something so fucking cliche? god, get some fresh material,) and to top it all off he got a shit grade on his book report.

as usual, his solution to a bad mood is to draw, get his emotions out on a page instead of letting them linger in his mind. unlike usual, though, he decides to bypass his notebook and instead grabs a pen, chooses a clear spot on his arm.

it took a while, but he finally ran out of steam to continue- it had been nearly two hours since he began. he was about to walk over to his bed and flop face down into his pillow when he felt it- the pins-and-needles of words being written that he had only felt once before. his eyes zeroed in on his arm, right under the drawing he had finished.

“two goldfish are in a tank. one turns to the other and asks, ‘do you know how to drive this thing?’”

soap snorts, more due to the situation than the shitty joke itself- and rushes to grab his pen again. no chance he was letting this opportunity slip by.

“why was the strawberry crying?”

“why?”

“because he was in a jam.”

and so the night continued like that- they exchanged shitty jokes back and forth for hours that night, up until soap was called for dinner.

[h5eavenly]

who tf told yeji? i kinda think it was yuna or woo. i also may be way off but i have a feeling yuna might be jyp gossip too… we don’t actually know that much about her and she was replying to y/n’s posts like a fangirl even before they were friends. she’s also been 100% good/nice so far and from what we’ve seen in this series, nobody is completely good/nice. everybody has a grey area at some point.

poor yeji dude. as much as y/n is going through it, she absolutely deserved this reaction from yeji and hyunjin. i’m glad yeji didn’t hold back and give her a chance to tell hyunjin bc honestly y/n has had so many opportunities to and failed so what difference would her telling him first now make. i also loved that y/n could recognise yeji’s “state of agony” and relate to it, therefore making her feel even more guilty and actually understand the weight of her actions. yeji also asking “what did i ever do to you?” is so fr bc she literally just existed in hyunjin’s life and that was enough for y/n to want to ruin her. to think that this whole chaos started just bc y/n’s toxic level of jealousy.

the imagery of hyunjin melting with y/n, literally begging to hear that it’s just a misunderstanding… fuck that hurt. in a way it was like he was begging to not have to endure the pain of their past again and the regret of letting himself get hurt again. the realisation that his blind trust in y/n has once again been his achilles heel and possibly always will be.

hyunjin telling y/n “it’s always someone else isn’t it” is so true. he reminds her of all the past opportunities he gave her to come clean to him and didn’t, but all she’s replying with is excuses that she was scared to lose him and yeosang’s threats. like ofc yeosang’s threats scared her but at the end of the day she dealt with them poorly until it was too late. so far this series she’s shown she feels remorse for her actions (bet related or not), but she’s always had a habit of preaching excuses or blaming someone else instead of owning her shit. so its understandable for hyunjin to not believe her immediately when she said seungmin forced her (i had a feeling what happened between them wasn’t consensual like i dm’d about). in a way it’s like the kid that cried wolf. from hyunjin’s perspective, she’s the common denominator in so many issues but somehow always finds away to divert blame away from herself.

as much as i wouldn’t blame hyunjin and yeji for never wanting to speak to y/n again i hope they talk about everything properly. i’m ofc looking forward to hyunjin and y/n’s talk, but i also really hope yeji and y/n talk to each other alone too. yeji deserves an explanation more than anyone tbh.

also i’m obsessed with the end referencing the sun (hyunjin) and moon (y/n), that was beautiful and tragic 🖤

i love how i ruined everyone for you that now you just cant trust anyone anymore i cannot 😭😭 i agree i think recognizing the pain in yeji plays a huge part in her guilt ultimately i feel like yeji and yn mirror each other sometimes they both have a sense of darkness to them but yn clearly had it much worse 😞 and yess yn feels remorse for her actions but instead of dealing with the consequences she runs away a lot and withers in self pity and hatred instead which is toxic as well

aww im so glad you liked it my love🥹🩷🩷🩷 this was so much fun to read i.just wanna kiss ur brain cus ugh its so sexy i love it this is one of my fav notes of urs i think tysmmm for blessing me w it🩷🩷🩷

[lazaruspiss]

watching batman ninja and taking notes bc idk how to focus <3 spoilers under the cut

batman ninja is a wild movie already but harleys design fucks

smth smth. everyone got sent to generally the same time/location with variation, time can vary by years (selina was sent 2 years before bruce) but probably not decades and id assume location varies to anywhere within a certain range of whatever island in japan that this is on.

nightwing and red hood were teamed up separately from batman before the blast that sent everyone back by the look of it. cute.

i wanna see ivyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy- DEATHSTROKE IS HERE?

ohh ok. time difference was based off of proximity/order that they were sucked in, making batman the last to show. a few minutes become years, everyone else were def much closer in timing but even a few seconds mightve made weeks difference in how far back they were sent.

lords alluded to so far: joker, penguin, ivy, deathstroke, two-face

mz ivy im in love w u

"once my fortress is complete, itll be my time to strike. yeahhh" OLD MAN. BOOMER. he says yeah like an adult actor playing a teen in an anti-drug ad campaign.

the lord intros are so fun actually

i love selinas little puppet, not a fan of bruces general disposition.

ok bruce looks better with the beard. also alfred what the fuck. how. and lmao. alfred. "lets go on a japan trip we get back."

HARLEYYYYY SHES SO CUTE. is this tara. i think its tara. love her.

classic "stop me or save the civilian trick" smh

congrats to bane on bulking up i guess? anyways. wheres the others. im bored of batman. i do love the little chibi batman who forcibly ejects bruce, someone mustve added a fail safe specifically for bruce being dumb and self destructive.

the lip syncing is off, is this a dub?

DICKIE!! anime hair... and dick's anime bf/leader of the ninjas.

"how do we regain the advantage when we have nothing" bruce. bruce. the whole squad is here + a ninja army. girl.

DAMIAN? oh hes still cute.

monkee :) hes so silly

so tims swords are just for decoration then? weirdo. joker gets his ass beat, whatever. tim states the obvious. backstab fest. im bored again.

"joker!! you'll kill yourself!!" "that's the point, lmao"

35 min in, still no red hood. just establishing shots to explain that each lord has the special time sticks.

"i didnt know who i was after i lost my car" could you be anymore pathetic. he isnt even cute pathetic, hes just "id push him into a puddle" pathetic. stop brooding you boring bitch. oh thank god. he acknowledges that he has other people carrying his ass. red hood still hasn't shown up, not even for bruces go team speech.

ACK. THE CUT IN ART. SO PRETTY. ill probably make another post for screenshots.

red hood time. finally. jason the buddhist monk and his joker hunt sidequest. a part of jasons lashing out at harley is framed in a way that makes it look like a sexual assault imo, so it's giving some mixed emotions. like if this turns out to just be some regular farmers this would be a "stranger breaks in and gropes your wife while threatening you" kinda deal. i mean they went ass shot to jason grabbing her and holding her like. ack. like hes holding her like that so he can break her arm but u gotta trust me it looks Bad. not to just narrate the entire scene but its a lot. jason's pissed and scary, the art is very pretty, im sacred and a little. you know. youve seen me post you know how i am.

this movie kinda. i personally think it wouldve looked better in 2d.

"if you knew him like i did" bruce... also mr j and harley are fully amnesiac so jason the effectively traumatize 2 strangers for no reason. jokerquinn gets a happy ending by becoming farmers. "we'll take them back with us-" NO??? THIS IS LITERALLY THEIR HAPPY ENDING?? THIS IS THEIR BEST/ONLY SHOT AND TRUE REHABILITATION BRUCE. BRINGING THEM BACK WOULD BE PURE STUPIDITY AND/OR SELFISHNESS.

jason saying bruce but bruce saying red hood...

whoops. they still remember, so bruce is just a dumb hoe who thought he and joker had something special.

why are there penguins here. like actual penguins. and why does slade have a gf.

red hood has my fav voice acting of the boys tbh, the others sound a bit clunky. and is ivy also tara. she sounds a bit like tt03 raven.

mech battle. slade is still hot. even if he is a cringe old man. HARVEY BUDDHA BOT?

dami should get to keep his monkey friend. as a treat.

THIS ISNT SKYRIM I DONT THINK HORSES CAN RUN LIKE THAT

ok two face is funny. coin said i gotta beat ur ass now. literal "switching on a dime" behavior

hi welcome back to robot wars. fight scenes are really hit or miss for me, i love em or i fall asleep. smth smth. joker moment. clowns doing the heavy lifting. and where is harley getting her hair dye from, or is that a wig?

fun fact! red spider lilies (the flower growing from jokers gas bomb) symbolize death <3

aaaaand we're back to mech battles. voltron assemble or whatever.

dami almost gets squished trying to save monkey

bruce. bruce are you having an autism event or are you being rude on purpose. anyways give the dues ex macina to dami he deserves it more. baby boy can play the flute so good <3

"momi?" "whos she" a monkey friend tim. obviously.

THE MONKEYS ARE HELPING HIM PLAY IM GONNA LOSE IT. thats so unrealistic but its sooooooooo cute.

m. monkey.

damian is having the time of his life fr

damian is no longer having the time of his life

bats. bat monkey. b. batman? how.

fire no match for batman made of monkeys and bats. anime punch.

Nightwing Vs Penguin, Red Hood Vs Deathstroke, Red Robin Vs Two Face, Robin Vs Poison Ivy

damian that was not a joke. A for effort tho.

ok so the amnesia WAS real but smth smth plant magic.

joker that is not what a joke is. you're worse that damian.

4 barrels, who do you think you are deathstroke. the guy who killed the prime minister of japan? HARLEY? harley. this frame gets its own post she straight up licked her. and thats a lot of bare monkey ass. blah blah they blow up robot. "keep your tongue to yourself" blushing rn

batjokes sword fight, im bored again. joker has a boner. who give a shit. bruce bores me in that special way of his. i am once again reminded about why i can only ever pay attention to him when Dick is involved. if someone else doesnt show up soon my eyes are gonna roll back into my head. joker is not funny enough to make this interesting. hes kinda hot tho. is it just me or are the animators losing steam towards the end of this. im. im bored. oh i missed the fans, those were cool, its nice to see them one last time. blah blah kill joker- wait a minu- ok nvm. coward. batjokes should die together an share a grave. in main canon even.

gonna cry over monkichi brb. at least he has monmi. his sister? gf? both?

ok so by the credits i assume this movie was originally in japanese. anyways. after credits. bruce does wayne stuff, selina does catwoman things. pfft. old style batcart dents a strangers car.

harley and ivy were tara strong ofc, and apparently jason and dami shared a VA, i didnt even notice that. so did dick and alfred. and grodd and deathstroke. a lot of double casting.

[izaswritings]

ik this is probably annoying but i have to know so sorry😭 do you ever plan om continuing faults of the mind? obviously its ok if not but i gotta know

its all good!! im glad you like the story enough to check up on it!!! at the moment I'm sorry to say I don't really have any plans on continuing it... its been awhile since I've really been into tangled, and I just don't have the time for that kind of project. that said, I've gone back to fics after longer hiatuses before!!!!

my plan atm is to see where the motivation takes me, but if I don't pick up the fic again by 2023, I was thinking of just posting my notes-- so if nothing else, even if I don't get around to writing the final chapters, you guys can at least see how I planned to end it!

[withloveajaxx]

HII CONGRATS ON 500!!!!!! dsurved frfr ANWAYAYWYAYWYAY

for the eveeeeent can i request a oneshot for ajax/childe ? *hands out amaryllis to you*

❁ prompt/s: "it's always my fault isn't it?" + childe

❁ warnings: slightly ooc childe :"D, angst, him leaving without telling you.

❁ summary: childe loves loving you. he always has and always will. but he hates being the reason why you're hurting.

❁ note: idk what the fuck i just conjured up in my brain. IM SO SORRY THIS IS BEING POSTED SO LATE NONNIE HUHUHU I HOPE THIS IS UP TO YOUR STANDARDS THOUGH :"D. lowkey tempted to make a part two bc ik this ooc and childe would never do this but eh i'll see. for now, please enjoy some very long overdue angst mwah <33

childe can't imagine a life without you. he can't fathom his life without the warmth of your touch, tending to his wounds whenever he came home injured. he always looks forward to seeing you after long missions far away, a joyous smile stretching upon his lips when he catches a glimpse of your figure awaiting him at the harbor. 

he loves his life with you. he could never deny such a thing. you've always made him feel nothing but happiness and love, and as a harbinger living through such a cruel life of violence and darkness, it was all he could ever ask for. 

but behind all the happiness in your relationship, there's an undeniable truth childe knows he has to face. despite everything, he knows he hurts you in ways unimaginable. 

(more utc!)

at the times he's away for months and months on end, you both send letters to each other. he never fails to notice the small and often times frequent ink stains on some of the words written across the crisp paper. childe could only imagine how much it pained you for him to be away for so long. his mind could only conjure images of your head buried in your hands, pressing your palms against your eyelids in an attempt to stop or catch the tears that threaten to poor endlessly from your eyes.

he never ceases to notice the way your lips wobble, your voice uneven and shaky when you ask him about how he's managed to injure himself so badly on nights he returns home from missions or battles. he's witnessed this sight many times, and he witnesses it again at this moment. 

he's lost count of how many times you've taken care of him like this. time and time again he finds his mouth go dry, his mind blanking for words to say as he watches you try to hold your tears back as you peer up at him. 

when you're done patching him up, childe is still astounded at how you still manage to peck his lips with the love you've never failed to show him since day one. after all this time, how do you still put up with him? how do you tolerate and love him unconditionally after all the times he's brought you so much pain? 

childe is helpless as he lets these millions of thoughts and questions run through his head, eyes clouded with an unfamiliar pain whilst he watches you retreat to your shared bedroom slowly. 

he lets a conflicted sigh fall from his lips, burying his face in his still dirtied and gloved hands. for once, childe doesn't know how to help you. he has not a single clue on how to make it seem like everything is fine, as if everything will get better.

for what he contemplates could be the last time, childe trudges defeatedly through the bedroom door. his feet are light against the wooden floorboards, movements as quiet as ever as to not wake you from your sleep.

he no longer sits himself down in his usual spot on the bed. instead, he kneels at the side of the bed, right in front of your resting figure. taking his gloves off, he brushes the strands of hair out of your face with his clean hand to take a good and proper look at your features.

even in your sleep, your eyebrows are creased in what seems to be worry or stress. for what is supposedly a moment of relaxation, your lips are drawn in a thin line, body tense and taut as you lay in bed.

"you're always so stressed these days, aren't you?" childe asks, even if he knew very well that you couldn't hear him. "and it's always my fault isn't it?" 

almost instinctively, he smooths the creases that form on your forehead, trailing his fingers down to caress the deep bags of your eyes and the evident frown on your lips before finally cupping your cheek.

there's a sad smile that stretches onto his handsome features when you unconsciously lean your head towards the familiar warmth of his hand. thankfully, you don't stir, only releasing a content sigh before resting comfortably once again.

oh how he was going to miss this.

with one last sweet and lingering peck to your cheek as well as an aching heart, childe whispers a heartfelt and genuine "i love you," before standing from his spot by the bed.

he hates what he's about to do. he'd never want to leave you. all he wishes is to be held and to be loved by you and only you. but hurting you, the one person who's ever loved him so wholly, was something he hated more. 

his heart ached and weighed heavy against his chest when he walked out the door with no intention of coming back. but realizing it could never sting more than knowingly hurting you, he thinks he'll be okay.

he'll do anything to take your pain away after all. even if it meant putting himself far far away from you.

taglist (send an ask to be added or removed): @dawndelion-winery @tiredsleep @codename-hiraeth @mari-san-cant @mininji @artificial-heartache

© withloveajaxx 2022. please do not copy, plagarize, or translate in any way.

[violenceenthusiast]

im curious why people are saying supernatural is jewish like idk if jewish writers makes an inherently jewish story especially when things like following out the christian apocalypse from revelations and showing a real physical g-d who is just some guy i think is super jarring since though christians claim to be against idolatry they seem totally fine showing depictions of gd or whatever i dont get jesus honestly but jews are far more strict and the idea of showing gds appearance is pretty wrong

WOOF okay um. Maybe this is one of those Tone Doesn’t Come Thru Well Online things but to me this is soo fucking rude… I’m half way between John Mulaney we don't have time to unpack all of that & Ben Wyatt wait it’s gonna bother me if I don’t explain why you’re wrong. 

This turned into all my thoughts. 

So like. First off, it’s all fun and games. We’re all just joking and joshing and projecting here on destiel dot tumblr dot com and Jupernatural is not an exception in a lot of ways. And so when someone shits on what we’re doing here (yes, even unintentionally) what you get is what happened: oh you think you’re funny well I’m about to be hilarious!!! aka I’m gonna do it even more now out of spite specifically because you said not to. Like it really is all jokes but also you know what’s not a joke? Antisemitism in all its forms, even the casual shit! It’s really draining and it builds up in your veins!! Just. Yeah. You saw a lot of people talking about it today in particular because much like other topics of the day, one thing kicks off a whole other turn of events. So like. one misguided comment that’s playfully antisemitic and then one more little one, and then one big/obvious one launched us (Jewish spn fans) into a whole bigger discussion about antisemitism and erasure of Jews in the spn fandom writ large. It’s one thing to be descriptive, offer a headcanon/what if, or employ a certain mode of analysis. It’s another thing to definitively say This Is The Truth, specifically when to do so overrides something else, especially in this case when what’s being overridden is Jews, an ethnoreligious minority. It’s also another thing to talk over Jews. And mind this has been building for days. Not in a bad way just like, it’s been topical for days and then today one big thing pushed it over the edge to us actually posting abt it (partially bc at that point it’s a pattern, which feels like it needs to be addressed). Like, destiel tumblr is small we pretty much all see all the same posts, and then Jewish spn fans… we’re friends, we chat about life? We joke around together, y’know? If you’re being antisemitic (yes, even unintentionally) we’re all gonna hear abt it. It’s how we stay safe or in this case, curate the online exp.

That being said tho projecting on fiction is like fun and even a good thing at times, and def opens up new modes of analysis. But! the other big thing here is that there IS a LOT of evidence for a Jewish reading of spn, in a lot of ways, and particularly if you know what to look for. Like there’s lots of niche Jewish slang (non-Jews just don’t know these things, and that is a reflection primarily of the writers but once you put it in the script it implies things about the characters too of course), the theology of the early seasons (I’ll get to that in a second), main character motivations (hold on), “Moishe Campbell” implying Mary is (and therefore Sam and Dean are) Jewish, etc. 

It’s not surprising to me or anything that non-Jews don’t catch anything/everything Jewish about spn but that Jews catch both sides of it, because that’s just how being part of a marginalized group works. You learn about your own stuff AND the dominant culture’s stuff because that’s how you survive (socially, psychologically, literally). Members of the dominant culture don’t need to learn the marginalized one, are never confronted with it, and so they just.. don’t. I don’t even mean that in a normative or accusatory way, that’s just an observation on the state of things. Non-Jews who aren’t part of another marginalized religion, aka expressed xtians and cultural xtians, have a ton of misconceptions about Judaism, for example, “Jesus was Jewish” and not, “Jesus was an asshole of an apostate who made life harder for Jews at the time in a myriad of ways and whose movement has had a lasting negative impact on world Jewry (and other peoples) for the ensuing millenia”. I truly Don’t Have Time right now to get into the varied and intense history of antisemitism in all its forms but. the point I’m making here is that I’m not shocked I need to explain that life experience shapes your worldview?? So if you’re Jewish you’re always gonna be living life through that version of the world and it does impact you?? Same as anything else?? As unwell as they may be, spn writers aren’t exempt from that. Jewish people writing about xtianity are doing so thru a primarily Jewish understanding and vice versa. Jews can (and did!) write about xtian lore but in a Jewish way! Some core Jewish themes: wrestling with angels/G-d, questioning G-d, IF there’s a G-d they will have to beg MY forgiveness, the afterlife isn’t really a big thing so all that matters is your time on earth, make amends to others directly and thru your actions rather than seeking absolution with G-d, you are not obligated to complete the work nor may you abandon it, etc… So that’s the other reasoning why we say “spn is Jewish” based solely on it being written by Jews. Rather than Death of The Author, let’s look at what the author has imbued the story with, both intentionally and unintentionally. And re: Chuck and idolatry… I don’t even know where to start with the way you phrased this but. the Jewish Spn Writers of Note are apparently Kripke, Gamble, and Edlund. All of whom stopped writing for the show years before the Chuck Is God plot! 

Like yes it feels very stupid to be writing a thousand words on antisemitism and supernatural but like. this is a spn blog run by a Jew so. This whole thing is also just the same every time. This is very representative of typical casual antisemitism.

[enderwalk]

i may not be in Dream Team Tumblr but i am an average dteam enjoyer speak ur roleswap truth !!!

ANON okay im Going to go insane hold on. I'm spending so long summarizing this so it makes Sense, and you can also send asks to @narcolepticelf too bc this is both of our au <3 And if we're lucky, he's gonna post some art of his GeorgeHD design he drew. BUT this is a long explanation/summary so it'll be under the cut.

TL;DR we swapped George and Dream's lore, so instead of there being DreamXD, we have GeorgeHD. XD is still in this au, along with XE (who is Sapnap’s counterpart god). XD, HD, and XE are guardians of the End, Overworld, and Nether respectively. It's the most self indulgent AU with a loving, obsessive god and his beloved human, but there's also healthy doses of angst sprinkled in so it's not all sweet.

In this AU, George is the power-hungry one who summons what he assumes is just some deity to possess him and grant him with the power to sort of take over. George becomes the vessel for the god of the Overworld, and HD gets to go dormant and sleep while George is granted with the power to do whatever he pleases. HD has no idea what destruction and trauma George causes, and is expelled when George is locked in the prison.

Funny thing, the expulsion causes HD to be weakened and injured - and if the god of the Overworld is injured from it, god help George. HD is sent to the main spawn area and since he’s wildly powered down and hurt, he wanders around until he finds the lights of the castle, and ends up in the Community House, where Dream had been staying since most people don’t bother to hang around there anymore after it got remodeled, which means Dream should be able to have peace and quiet, since he’s stopped involving himself with wars and whatever is happening with L’Manburg/Manberg/NLM at this point - all he knows is that these countries corrupted his friend.

HD walks into the Community House and starts going through chests for anything he can use to heal himself. Dream thinks that HD is George at first, since they look nearly identical. HD manages to sweet-talk Dream into helping him. Whether Dream and George were something, or Dream had feelings for George before all of this is left ambiguous, but it should be noted that Dream slips and calls HD George, and doesn’t exactly consider him his own separate person. And, well, he’s definitely attracted to HD from the get-go. You probably would be, too, if you had an eight foot god calling you moonlight and being all sweet on you.

All HD knows is that Dream is fun to fluster, and he vaguely reminds him of XD. He has no idea how far the similarities run until a few weeks later when he finally convinces Dream to take off his mask.

Dream has two intersecting scars across his face that form an X. XD has two golden scars that match. That's when we get this gem of a scene that Damien wrote:

Gods,he was. He was perfect. Too perfect. The scars intersecting on Dreams face,the mess of freckles framing striking green eyes. It had HD frozen in his tracks. Like he'd seen a ghost. And it was really like he had,reminded all at once of Him. How loving and vibrant and bright and alive he'd been. It hurt worse than anything he could've experienced. Even death would be kinder than to give him this spitting image. Like grinding salt into an open wound after tearing it back open.     

It was like the god physically stopped glowing. The added light from his aura dimming the room as it faded. His eyes went from sparkling bright blue to a darker shade,heartbreak and confusion swirling in his stomach.

"No. You're…perfect. Too perfect."    

At that,a sick twist filled the god's chest, constricting his airways and squeezing his heart. He felt like he was going to explode with emotion,gritting his jaw. This was a joke, wasn't it? XD was playing a joke on him. HDs voice came out strained,taking a step back from Dream. Like he'd been betrayed.

"You-all this time and you were right here? Do you even know- do you know how long I looked? How badly it hurt? Every corner of this realm and the next and you were here? Doing what? Hiding from me? Do you even understand what I would have done for you? The stars I would have hung? The mountains I would have moved? Do you understand this-this heartbreak!? And you've been here this entire time. to what?! Make a mockery of me? Just like always? To isolate and hurt me and- how dare you- how DARE you!"     

The gods voice bounced off the walls as his hurt grew. Consequently he grew taller,stepping towards Dream again with a fury like no other. But when he grabbed his hoodie,tears burning in his eyes,it dawned on him. Not a single trace of God in the man's body. Not an ounce. Just like the realm they were in. Nothing. Like always. But it still hurt,and he couldn't help the tears welling in his eyes.

"You-you-...gods you…"   

HDs grip loosened,the god's fury shrinking along with his height. He came back to a normal size,sinking down to his knees in the process. It would've been a sight to see. His hands trailing meekly down to Dreams pants legs,gripping the clothing as silver tears streamed down his cheeks. He was a mess of emotion,all at once. Overwhelmed and at the man's mercy,slumped into a pathetic little ball at his feet. He was shaking and crying-true genuine raw heartbreak wracking his form.

"You look-exactly like him and I'm- I-"    

HD new what the revolution meant. It meant while XD wasn't here to toy with his heart, it was just further confirmation that he really was gone. And now the mortal he'd grown to love alongside him would probably want him gone too. And even if he didnt,maybe he would stick around till the earth claimed him. And it was something he could hardly stand the thought of. HD hiccuped through his tears,trying to speak.

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

We've written 25k words so far in about a week, and we haven't even introduced XE into the story. It also took 22k words before these idiots even kiss.

And if anyone has any questions, feel free to ask me or @narcolepticelf, because we're both brainrotting over this AU. There's art and playlists to come, and maybe a fic if enough people are interested!

[neverdoingmuch]

Wait cql lawyer/law school AU

i got you my pal dont worry!!

law school, im gonna be honest and say i know like nothing about law or law school so pls ignore any inconsistencies or inaccuracies

lwj goes to law school and he is definitely the top student in his class. they’ve been there for like a month and everyone already knows he’s gonna be the best

his one and only competition is this dude called wei wuxian but lwj isn’t particularly worried about him

so far they’re still in the stage of the course where they do the fun things to sucker people into doing the class for the semester so there’s been some practise debates and arguments and stuff in their tutorial classes

wei wuxian has that Charisma and like yeah all of his arguments are perfect but also he has an amazing smile and people are like yes i can trust him 

(he’s definitely the sort to be like hm, the easy way to argue this case would be to quote some laws and use precedence to justify this but that’s boring)

lwj is also good at that sort of stuff because his arguments are perfect and everything is so perfectly researched that there should be no ground at all for someone to lodge a counterargument

(wei wuxian manages somehow and it makes lwj so mad)

but that’s whatever lwj thinks,, a lot of people join law thinking it’s gonna be like the tv shows and books and then get completely blindsided when it comes to the rote learning part or like the actual laws 

and for all of wwx’s confidence, lwj hasn’t actually seen wwx so much as touch the textbook/s and he always studies in the law library so he knows that wwx has probably never even been there bc he hasn’t seen him even once (why’s he looking? bc he needs to see which books wwx uses to study,, bc there has to be something going on there,, obviously)

then they do their first like proper written assignment and lwj and wwx tie for the highest scores and now lwj has a Rival and he refuses to lose to someone who thinks that putting a ‘-us’ sound at the end of a word makes it latin (did wwx say habeas corpus and then point at a soft drink and go  sprite-us can-us,,, maybe,,,,)

anyway! lwj and wwx are kinda rivals for the top spot and it’s one of those situations where one test lwj wins by a point but then the next test wwx gets full marks and they just keep exchanging the top spot in class

and this whole time wwx is like The Worst to have in class. he’s always interrupting to ask questions or just straight up not listening and spends the class doodling pictures of rabbits (they’re cute but wwx is terrible and he’s not allowed to make cute drawings)

so after a few months the most horrible thing happens.... they get put together in a project and lwj is like ugh. internally of course but his face is also saying ugh

the first time wwx and lwj get together to work on the project, lwj is prepared with a proper list of tasks to do all nicely split up between the two of them and a schedule for when they should get certain parts done by. 

needless to say, lwj does not expect wwx to be ready, but wwx is definitely on top of things

he rocks up and is like yeah let’s do this, this and this and have them done by this time - basically proposing to do everything that lwj has already written down

and lwj is pleasantly surprised and is like hm maybe i misjudged wwx and decides to like re-evaluate his opinion on him

in doing so he realises that when he’d never seen wwx studying, it wasn’t an exaggeration at all. he’s never seen wwx so much as touch a textbook or spend more than a minute on a laptop doing something that wasn’t minesweeper or solitaire

but wwx is also making all of their deadlines and even adds extra information and resources to their document that could be useful elsewhere and sometimes he shows up to their study sessions and he looks absolutely exhausted

eventually lwj manages to get the truth out and wwx is just like yeah it’s easier to get worse grades than a genius but if you both study and you still get lower grades, it’s not easy,, for jc or for me

so wwx usually studies at night when his brother is asleep and lwj is like that’s bad, you can’t keep that up and just when wwx is about to go off at him lwj is like you can come study at my place

and thus begins the wonderful time where everything is alright and lwj falls in love with wwx

they work really well together and wwx is strangely considerate and nice? when he finds out lwj likes rabbits, he goes out and buys bunny post-it notes for lwj and starts to always bring him a doodle of bunnies every time he comes over. he always gets his work done on time, early even, and his work is always so brilliant and every time wwx smiles at him, lwj feels warm inside etc etc

for a long while lwj is like yes (: this is friendship (: bc he’s never had a crush before but then on the day they submit their project wwx is like hey,, the two of us make a great team,, we should always work together,, now and next year and even when we graduate,, i want to help the innocent people who need our help and i think i’d like it a lot if you joined me and lwj has his oh moment

they get a perfect score on the project of course and even after it finishes, wwx keeps coming over to lwj’s place to study or just hang out and lwj is just falling more and more for wwx each day

they’re best friends now and everyone gets used to seeing them work together on projects and then turn around to try and decimate each other when they’re working one on one and lwj thinks that he might just be the happiest he’s ever been

but then one day wwx doesn’t show up to class. it shouldn’t be strange but wwx has never missed class even once and he ends up hearing from lxc who heard from jgy that wwx was caught sabotaging some other student’s work (the other student was jzxun, who had a fondness for playing devil’s advocate and other than wwx once telling him that his argument was shit, wwx never spoke to him or seemed to know who he was but lwj is a bit too angry to remember that)

he manages to find wwx outside of his dorms as he’s moving out and he’s just like why did you do that? and wwx is like oh y’know,, bc he’s not really sure what’s happening himself,, one second he was at the top of his class and the next he was being brought before a board and being told that he was being expelled but he’s not going to tell lwj that bc lwj would definitely try and stand up for him and then they’d both get expelled

but lwj is furious and just spits out well if our dreams meant so little to you then maybe it’s a good thing you failed now,, bc his mother was a lawyer who took all these little jobs that helped people who actually needed the help and lwj was looking forward to doing that with wwx and he doesn’t even seem to care that now they can’t do that 

wwx flinches and then smiles at him and just cheerily says, that’s me and leaves. he doesn’t look back and lwj doesn’t chase after him.

lwj doesn’t see him again for years (you can do 13 or 5 or however long you feel like)

lwj is a fully licensed lawyer and he’s working for the family company and he spends half of his time working on cases and uses the rest of his time to do like outreach programs where he goes and visits schools and runs sessions on what it’s like to be a lawyer, how to apply, and to provide assistance to any students who decide to study law at uni

and then at one of these programs he meets this kid, wen yuan, who is ridiculously bright and enthusiastic and has a smile that seems oddly familiar

at the end of the second session he comes up to lwj and is like mr. lan, is your name lan wangji? and lwj just says yes, expecting the kid to be a fan of one of his cases or something but then wen yuan is like oh wow! i thought i recognised you from my dad’s photo!

and lwj isn’t expecting much but he asks what the photo looks like and wen yuan pulls out this photo from his pocket and lwj immediately recognises it,, it’s the only photo he has of him and wwx

your father is wei ying? lwj asks him and wen yuan is like yes, hesitates, and then asks, would you like to see him?

and that’s how lwj finds himself following wen yuan to some dinky little office that has a plaque outside that reads wen and wei

(wen ning is the nicest and sweetest person ever and lots of people underestimate him but then he’s an absolute monster on court. he gets up and completely decimates the opponent and then at the end is like (: it was so nice to meet you!! i am baby!! and all that,, you know our boy)

anyway they walk in and wwx turns to greet wen yuan but then he sees lwj and is like woah! you! and he’s not sure whether to hide or go and hug lwj so he just gives him a fist bump,, like a bro,, and immediately wants to shrivel up and die

anyway they get the reunion stuff out of the way, swelling music, tender wrist holding, lots of staring, lwj silently declaring his wholehearted love for wwx and refusing to believe rumours about him again even though he doesn’t actually know what happened, you know how it goes

from wwx’s side of things,, after he got kicked out he went to some small uni. good in its own right but not known for their law program and ended up specialising in family law

the first case he ever won was for the wens to have the right to keep custody of a-yuan and the first case wen ning ever won was to let wwx adopt a-yuan bc i’m soft like that

so wwx has just been kinda vibing,, being a single dad, living with the wens and helping to make that difference he always promised he would

now this isn’t gonna be some au where lwj goes oh my! i must give up my high salary job and work with wwx! bc lwj has been doing good stuff at his current job and for all of his family’s stuffiness, they run a fair and just company 

but! he does end up helping wwx when wwx gets a letter with a bunch of information about the jins and how they’re actually super corrupt and evil (big surprise,,) and how wwx was maybe definitely framed bc he was doing some casual work on the side and stumbled across some bad shit on the jins back in uni

lwj ends up being the one to take the case officially but wwx is definitely the guy leading it and so lwj ends up spending most of his time at the wen-wei office

lwj definitely bonds with wen yuan, who also wants to go into law, and writes him recommendation letters and helps him edit his applications and stuff

(and one day wen yuan is like leaving you was the hardest thing dad ever did and i dont think you appreciated how much he cared about you. he really did think that he annoyed you ‘til the end and lwj is like no! he didn’t! and wen yuan is like yeah i know but you gotta tell him and lwj really does mean to but the time is never right or something like that but also wen yuan is all but calling lwj dad at this point)

anyway they end up going to court, side by side, working as a team just as they promised to do and just as they finish their final day on the case, ended with the jury ruling jgy guilty and wwx’s reputation all but saved, wwx turns around and flings himself at lwj

is he crying? is he laughing? a bit of both tbh but wwx ends up confessing right then and there, still on record and everything (is that how that works??? idk! let’s say it does)

and what can lwj do but make out with him?

did a news crew come in to film the results of this massive court case just to end up with five minutes of wangxian kissing?? maybe! but when it played on tv it meant wwx and lwj didnt have to actually tell anyone they got together

(and does lwj eventually pop the question using wwx’s bad latinification? yes and wwx is too busy laughing to accept at first but he does and they end up being the worst possible tutors for wen yuan as he goes through law school bc they keep being all gross and lovey-dovey and acting like law school is the most romantic place in the world)

[aphrodite-would-be-proud]

i adore everything you write especially erwin like he’s my number one and u write him so well i keep coming back<3 would love to hear your thoughts on the different types of dates he would take you on :)) ty and i hope you’re well !!

Omfg I really needed to hear this today :( thank you so much💛 you're too kind.

Im so happy to hear that I'm write Erwin i a good way! I've actually been thinking about his character a lot! My Erwin posts actually get the least notes bc he's just underappricated, tho imma make sure to write him more from now on just for you 🥰

I actually really liked this request idea so imma split it in two part bc i don't wanna make a long post

Type of dates with Erwin PT.1 {pt.2 in masterlist}

{ Erwin x reader | tw: none | fluff, romance | modern }

{ "La Lettura" 1873 by Antonio Mancini 1852 - 1930 }

Ideal dates : these are dates he plans up ahead, makes sure they go smoothly and you're both are having fun. He really looks forward to these dates, they're like an event for him. He saves them up for important occasions like your anniversary, valentine's day, birthday, etc.

1. Romantic dinner by candle lights: he's a sucker for classics and romance cliches. Once a month or so, when you're both free. He'd make a reservation at a fancy restaurant, a secluded table with multiple candles and a nice view of the night sky waiting for you.

You'd both dress us, he'd be a gentleman all the way and open the doors for you, tell you how precious you look while kissing your hand. Maybe even a bouquet of fresh flowers if he's feeling extra.

The night would be spent quietly, talking while drinking wine as your food is getting ready. You two could talk together forever and not get bored, he also could listen to you talk about your passions all day.

At dessert time, he slowly falls in love with you again when you offer him a piece of yours, he'll gladly eat it off your fork. You hold hands under the table and he circles his thumb against yours.

When going home, he'd wrap his arm around your waist, your head on his shoulder. It's the perfect night.

2. Picnic near the lake at sunset, ends with stargazing: this usually takes place in spring or summer, maybe even autumn. When the weather is just perfect and the sky is just clear enough. You both prepare a basket before hand, he wears a light blue shirt to match his eyes.

You arrive around lunch time, having picked a nice place under a tree to shield you from the sun. The sound of children playing in the distance quieting down as time goes on. You both prepared each other's favourite food before hand.

It's around sunset when he wraps the blanket you bought with you around you, the wind having picked up. He kisses your forehead before pulling you closer to his side. You watch the sunset together as the ducks in the lake swim lazily around.

When it's completely dark, is when you finally lay down together, facing the sky. You point to a certain formation and he tangles his fingers with yours before guiding them to the next, he knows a lot about the stars. He shows you the fading ones who's only remains are ghosts of their pasts, he also shows you the newly formed ones who's light is just reaching us.

With your head on his chest, his calm deep voice talking about the stars and the warmth the blanket is offering, you fall asleep.

You wake up in the passenger seat on the ride home, glancing to the side you can see him driving with a smile on his face, he looks happy, relaxed even. You go back to sleep.

3. Going to see a musical together: it's one of the dates he really looks forward too, he's actually a huge musicals nerd but only his close friends know that. So what's better than mixing his favourite thing to watch with his favourite person? You!

He knows the tickets are expensive but he promises you it's worth the inconvenience, so you book two seats online.

When you arrive, you sit next to each other while the room is slowly getting filled. You can hear the actors getting ready off-stage but can't make out what they're saying. Erwin is next to you looking through the play flyer they gave and explaining the story to you.

That day, is the most day you've seen Erwin laugh from the depth of his heart. He'd look at you each time something really funny happens. Squeeze your hand a bit whenever an intense scene is happening. Bring your hand against his lips for a second when a romantic scene is happening.

He's just fully emerged into it. When you see the shine in his eyes, the way his lips curl up just a bit, is when you realise how beautiful Musicals are.

It becames a habit to visit one each year on his birthday.

4. Go to a museum or an art gallery: one thing you've learned from being with Erwin, is that he can turn the most boring things interesting. He just has a way with words and a matching deep voice to go with it, he could read the ingredients on the back of a shampoo bottle and you'd still listen.

Naturally, it was just a matter of time before one of you suggested visiting a museum. You pick a day when not a lot of people would be there.

He makes it fun, interesting and actually educational. You've been walking peacefully in long corridors with paintings and other forms of art displayed around each corner. He seems to have endless knowledge about each piece, telling you both a secret funny fact about it and a base knowledge.

The perfect tour guide, he encourages you to participate and even guess information based on the art and how it makes you feel. He smiles whenever you get something right and chuckles when you don't, it's a win-win situation.

5. Horseback riding: this one happens whenever you visit his parents who retired in the country side, they're really lovely people and seem to genuinely like you. Not to mention how Erwin just shows you off proudly to his parents like you're made out of pure gold.

It's a quiet small town that makes you forget about the city, the air is refreshing and the people are kind, the patries are delicious and the baker is kind. You two could get lost walking near fields of flowers for hours.

He assures you that you have all the time to try everything else, for now he's excited to show you something he's been doing since he was a kid.

The people at the stable seem to recognise him, even the horses are kinder to him than you. You're a bit jealous you won't lie, but he just guides through befriending a certain white horse with braids in it's hair. You even manage to feed them some sugar cubes.

You've underestimate just how tall a horse is, so now when faced with the option to ride on its back you almost back away. Meanwhile Erwin looks really natural and comfortable just getting on one, is this the same man who didn't know you could turn your phone screen sideways till you showed him?

So you end up sharing a horse, he wraps your hands around his waist and tells you to trust him, it will be okay. And just when a glimmer of hope rises in your heart that maybe this isn't as scary as you thought, that man somehow makes the horse go so fast it almost rivals the speed of sound, at least in your mind it did.

It's the most fun and adventures date so far, your heart is pumping by the end of the day as adrenaline runs through your veins. You're both panting and he seems like a kid on Christmas.

Thankfully his parents somehow foresaw this happening and prepared dinner for both of you while apologising for their son. Soon enough, they arm you with enough embarrassing childhood stories about Erwin for later use.

6. Visiting historical spots: it's something his father suggested to you both while you're getting the car ready to drive home. Soon enough you were discussing it while on the road and both of you seemed to be on-board.

It's an actually entirely different experience to see these places in person than in photos in school history books. Everything is so much bigger than you expected, so much older and all the details.

You can see all the different angles just by walking around, both of you seem to be entranced at just how strangely alluring it is to see this great build and know it's more than 500 years old, even Erwin seems to be lost for words for once.

The memories you made, the silly photos you took, the places you held hand and kissed in. It's all was just so lovely. And so it becomes a yearly tradition that you both save up for.

[courtney-deserved-better]

whats ur writing schedule/process like! not in a “write faster” way, but i think once you mentioned writing in script form? and i like the way you wrote ur most recent fic! just curious bc ur works are just really good :)

this is a great question!!

if its not slippery slopes, ill usually get an idea for something and periodically jot down notes when they come to me until I feel like i have enough information to start writing (or if im just motivated), that's what i did for my horror challenge rewrite. and for stuff that's like... rewrites of an episode that aren't as character-focused as slippery slopes, i usually read the episode transcripts and try to replicate that total drama style with my own writing

for shorter oneshots, i usually just get a vague idea and run with it until i find a good ending spot, then i go back and clean it up a bit so the structure works

slippery slopes is an... interesting cycle. chapters are getting long enough that i cant just write them in one sitting any more (i think ch5 was the last chapter i did that for) and instead ill agonize over the beginning (always the hardest part to write for me) but once i get going with that i usually finish the chapter within a few days. then i reread the previous chapter to make sure it flows ok (and there aren't any contradictions) and then ill give myself a break where i dont do anything total drama related before coming back to edit and post. though before I do all that I type up notes and rough dialogue bits

and then once i post it it's like... a weight off my chest? like ive been purged or something?? idk its a weird sensation but im just like i Physically Cannot Write Anything For This Right Now and i don't start on the next chapter until that goes away. and then i either start the beginning and do nothing for a week before going back and finishing the chapter or i go into a manic state and write nonstop for a few days. right now i haven't reached a point where im ready to begin writing chapter 10 but i have a lot of notes for it.

(also as soon as i finish posting a chapter i try not to go on my laptop for like 12 hours so i don't obsessively refresh my email for comments. i love reading comments so much holy shit. please comment guys it makes fic authors feel so happy we will love you for it)

as for scripts: i am working on being a writer professionally, but specifically a playwright. writing in a script format comes more naturally to me than writing prose. funnily enough, i started posting fanfic just to practice my prose (and fix stuff in cobra kai that i didnt like) but things sort of... ended up here? idk man but im enjoying it.

right, so because writing in a script format is easier when im really struggling with a section in a fic ill usually scrap whatever i had and write it like a script, then translate that into prose. i was very excited to write the family videos for chapter 9 of slippery slopes, but i was Having Issues, so i redid it as a script and then rewrote that as prose. ill put the script version under the cut if you're interested in that.

but thank you so much for the question!! i do think my writing process is a bit unconventional but hey i think things are turning out well! if you have any more questions feel free to send them in!!

ok here is the last scene of ch 9 of slippery slopes in script format:

[SIERRA]

MOM: Hi honey! Omigosh this is so exciting! I bet you’re having such a great time! Especially since Chris is there! Is Chris watching this? Hi Chris! You know, I loooved you on that ice skating show. Your hair was fantastic! Well, it always is, haha. Do you really make your own hair gel? I’ve been trying to perfect the recipe but you’re just so hard to track down! Oh, you’re such a funny guy! I laughed sooo hard when you made all those jokes about marrying Chef.

Chef: hey!

Chris: ok just for the record, I wasn’t joking, we are married, Sierra tell your mom we’re married

Sierra: …can we just turn it off please

[COURTNEY]

DAD: Courtney, sayang, I know you’ve been going through a lot right now—

MOM: So you’d BETTER make it count. You’ve made it this far before, I want to see you getting all the way to the finale this time. And winning it. Enough moping about those hideous, good-for-nothing slackers! That’s what you get for hanging around freaks like them. You’re doing this for the million, now get the million. Is that clear?

ZARINA: And kick ass!

DAD: Zarina!

Video cuts out.

Alejandro: courtney you good?

Courtney: no, she’s right. Mama didn’t raise no quitter

Alejandro: [knows she’s still upset about duncan and gwen]

[ALEJANDRO]

MOM: Hola, Alejandro. We hope you are doing well, especially in such unsavory conditions. I’m glad to see you’ve made it to the final four— we expected nothing less, of course.

DAD: You have been utilizing your skills quite well. Though I wish you hadn’t been so… blatant about it. You’ll have to work twice as hard once this is over to convince people you’re trustworthy. But surely you were aware of that going into this… odd endeavor. That’s just politics. Reputation is everything.

JOSE: [snorts] Oh, and what a reputation you have, Al. I could easily compile hours of footage of your failures, but I, unlike you, do not waste my time on the frivolities of reality television. Though you always have been lacking in taste. Especially with that bratty girlfriend of yours— oh, my mistake, aren’t you dating the whiny weakling? It’s so hard to keep track! [laughs]

Alejandro: callate!

MOM: I’m sure Alejandro is just working an angle on them.

DAD: Whatever the case is, do not disappoint us.

[NOAH]

MOM: Hi Noah, I’m sorry, I don’t have time to record a full video, but I’m proud of you! Here are your sisters!

ISWARI: A million dollars? A million [bleep] dollars? Win it, Noah! Win it!

RUTH: Dude!! This is crazy! I know you can do this— good luck! Ark misses you! [holds up Ark who barks]

MARA: Are you insane? Why aren’t you dating Alejandro already?

Noah: shut up, mara, just because you can’t keep a boyfriend—

ANYA: Don’t let ‘em trick you! No mercy! Crush their skulls if you have to— no, wait, you’re not strong enough for that. We’ll get there!

LIYA: I say this as your sister, someone who loves you but is constantly annoyed by you— for someone who is quite literally a genius, you sure can be an idiot sometimes.

BALLARI: Okay, I literally have no idea how you’ve made it this far without an athletic bone in your body— are we sure you aren’t adopted? I’m kidding

ABS: You’re stubborn as hell when it comes to me, so you better be stubborn as hell when it comes to winning! And when you do win, get me a frozen yogurt machine, will you? I promise I won’t make you rock climb again!

JAEL: If you lose this, I’ll kill you with this racket. And then use your guts to make myself a new racket. So don’t fuck it up. Again.

Noah: [frozen, ashamed]

Sierra: well that was a mess

Courtney: ok show of hands, who felt better after hearing that? [no one raises hands]

Chris: yeah I was expecting this to be a lot more heartwarming…

Chef: chris just look at them. If they had stable home lives they wouldn’t be doing reality tv

Alejandro: can we please stop talking about this. Also aren’t you supposed to be flying the plane

Chef: oh fuck

Chris: yeah sure. I think im gonna call my mom

Everyone: …

Noah: ok so that was really shitty. Why dont we all go to first class and try and ignore our problems

Everyone: yeah ok sounds good

***

Courtney: so that sucked

Alejandro: at least your dad seems ok

Courtney: true. What are your guys dads like

Noah and Sierra: bold of you to assume I know my dad. Jinx

***

Alejandro: that last girl… you mentioned a sister who does tennis and hates you

Noah: yep

Alejandro: why?

Noah: none of your business. but… it is pretty justified

[cunningambitousdetermined]

i need a plot for this

yall so ive been trying really hard to get back into writing and i went to a writing camp this summer. im going to post a poem that i wrote there later bc im super proud of it but right now i have something else i need help with. SO basically there was a prompt about someone finding a letter or a note. that’s the prompt. so i wrote something, really liked it BUT I HAVE NO IDEA WHERE TO TAKE IT FROM HERE. my basic ideas involve the two characters meeting each other again to do SOMETHING WHICH I DONT KNOW and slowly arcane (youll see when you read the story below) thaws and falls in love with kalon and kalon has always been in love with her and its like best friends to enemies to friends to lovers ya know? ANYWAY if you dont hate me for being inactive and needy, please read this and help me. 

Dear Arcane,

It’s been a while, hasn’t it? 10 years. Wow. I don’t even know if you’ll ever get this, you could’ve moved. You could be dead. Oh god, that’s dark. You’re not dead, someone would’ve told me, I’m sure. So that must mean that there’s a good chance you have this, but I’m not even sure if you’ll read it.

He was right, as he most often was. Arcane had not planned to read the letter from the moment she read her name on the envelope, written in a neat sort of messy handwriting that could only come from one person. The letter had been sitting at her desk for a week before memories began to drown her and she knew she had to open it.

That’s not the point though, I’m sure you’ll read this. You’ve always been a sucker for the intimacy of written letters. Maybe that’s why I wrote to you instead of calling.

Arcane closed her eyes, the pounding of the memories at the door slowly consuming her. She took a deep breath and let them in. The whispers started to fill the room, every word echoing off the walls, like her past had become a living, breathing thing in her room. How could he write her now? After all these years. Anger reared it's small head in the back of her mind. How could he be so casual as if he wasn't the boy who ripped her heart out and tore it to pieces. 

Maybe it’s because I did read all the letters you wrote to me. Even after the voicemails stopped filling my phone and the emails ran dry, your letters kept coming.

She remembers writing those letters, the pen shaking in her hand as it hit the paper. She remembers wondering what you said to someone like him, a friend who left you behind. The squeeze in her chest that tightened each time he didn’t reply. The break in her heart when the last letter she ever wrote was returned to her doorstep.

If you’ve read this far without tearing my letter to pieces, then I would say this is a good start to our reunion. I’ve missed you. Your stubborn ways, always trying to keep me safe. But you always came with me wherever I went anyway. I miss your secret smile, the one you saved just for me. The treehouse we built in your yard. Do you miss that? I wonder if you wonder about me. I wonder if I can even ask that of you.

She did miss them. But, those things that she missed were long gone. The treehouse was overgrown with vines, Arcane was sure you couldn’t even get into it anymore. She went with him on his stupid adventures because what would she do if he left and met new people? He would leave her and she would be alone. So she desperately followed him blindly, hoping it would keep him close. Arcane missed her secret smile, the genuine one she had always saved for him. He missed it. How could he miss something that he destroyed. With his one and only letter to her, he demolished any leftover love for him that hid in her heart. He couldn’t ask if Arcane wondered about him. That wasn’t fair. That night, ten years ago, was still a raw wound in her soul that she was pretty sure would never heal.

~

The rain was relentless that night, banging against every edge of the house, but a little girl was waiting by the door, not even flinching as the lightning and thunder clapped furiously. Arcane peeked her head above the window frame to find the mailman running through the storm, his frantic steps pounding through the floor of the house. Her eyes lit up with a hope that was slowly fading with each mail drop. She opened the door and hid the small smile that started to spread up her face with a cough.

“Hi, Dan!” Arcane’s voice gave away the excitement that was flooding her system.

“Hey, Arcane.” Dan couldn’t help the pitiful grin that he gave her. She waited by the door for him every day and each day there was no letter for her. It must be soul-crushing, he thought, waiting for a letter that never comes.

“Is there…?” Arcane was practically on her tiptoes at this point. Dan rifled through the letters, dread settling as her name wasn’t there. Again. And then there was a squeal. “Oh, Dan! I found it! I knew- I knew it- I told them!” Her sentences didn’t even come out fully as she beamed, her smile brighter than any ray of the sun.

Arcane had run into the house, a breeze following in her wake. Plopping down into the soft plush couch, she ripped open the envelope, not caring about the paper that flew everywhere in the room. A paper fluttered out, floating toward the ground. Arcane grabbed it, hands shaking, she could practically feel the sweat dripping down her face. Words were the easiest way to break someone. The letter only contained eleven words, yet they would stick with her for the rest of her life.

Stop writing me. None of it was real. You were nothing.

Eleven words. And they shattered her. Crumbling, shattering, a million pieces breaking. Sobs racked through her whole body, her chest shaking and trembling with each broken breath. She caught her face in the mirror hanging off the pale wall and didn’t recognize the girl that stared back. You were nothing. A scream tore through her, the ache of her heart so raw that even the sun seemed to cry, rain dripping onto the panes of the windows. And slowly, so very slowly, Arcane buried the ache and gathered the shattered pieces of her heart and encased them in an impenetrable cage, never to opened again.

~

The ache was still present now, ten years after the letter had arrived. The dullness of her buried hurt made her clench her fists around the letter that sat in her hand now, the same lopsided handwriting adorning it.

But, that’s not why I’m writing this letter. I’m writing this with an actual purpose, if you can imagine that. I didn't just write to rehash our friendship. 

Arcane could feel her eyes narrowing, fighting the urge to roll her eyes at the inanimate piece of paper. An actual purpose? To break her heart all over again? This time she did roll her eyes, even though no one was there to see it. But, it wasn’t the fact that he wrote her after all these years or that his tone was friendly throughout that made her body freeze. It was the last line that had the hairs on the back of her neck standing to attention.

In all the years that Arcane had known him, he'd never been very dependent. He often just struggled in silence and figured them out on his own. Not once, not ever, had has asked for help. But, there the sentence was inked in his slanted, loopy writing. 

I need your help.

Love,

Kalon

  ~~everything below here is stuff that doesnt have to be a part of the story but i still liked it and where it was going (idk please give me ideas)~~

The quiet, shock of the room seemed to weigh on Arcane. She flopped back onto her bed, the soft pillows cushioning her landing. I need your help. Those few, simple words, tugged at the strings that bound her heart. He needed her. The thought was fleeting as just as quickly as it came, it left. In its spot was anger. Now he needed her? After all those years when she needed him? What did he do then? Nothing. And that’s what she was going to do now. She huffed in satisfaction, tossing the envelope to the side. Her fingers reached into her hair, massaging her head. There were too many things to think about right now. Arcane squeezed her eyes shut as memories stung her eyes in the form of tears. 

~

“Please, don’t leave me.” Arcane had whispered, her small breaths filling the one room of the treehouse. 

“I don’t have a choice. You know I don’t want to go.” Kalon’s voice broke and he looked away so Arcane couldn’t see the tears in his eyes. It was silent. 

“We’ll still be best friends right?” 

“Yeah.” Kalon’s reply didn’t hold much conviction, causing Arcane to look over at him, confused, glossy eyes narrowing. 

“To the moon and back, Kal, remember?” She said, her tone desperate. It was a promise they made one night as they were watching some cheesy movie on the old television set. The boy had told the girl that he loved her too ‘the moon and back’. Kalon had then explained that the two characters said that so that they would never be apart. They could meet at the same moon, always and then they could go back. And then, they would never be fully apart. Arcane had liked that. So naturally,  she had grabbed Kal’s face and made him promise that they would go ‘to the moon and back’ if they were ever apart. It became a goodbye for them, a way of saying ‘I’ll see you soon’. 

“Yeah,” Kal had replied, a smile barely curling through his lips, “I’ll race ya there.”

~

She wasn’t sure how long she lay there, letting her memories flow down her cheeks and into the bedsheets, but eventually she had to get up. She pulled herself up and off the bed, limbs protesting at the use. She just needed a few days is all, then she wouldn’t even remember what she was crying for.  Kalon didn’t mean anything to her anymore.

thank you for reading this far, i love all of you. just throw out ideas please. or give me some advice, i would love that. whether its about my writing or the plot i would love to have tips and constructive criticism on how to get better! tagging some moots who i hope dont hate me after this below the cut:

@natashxromanovf @pad-foots @griffxnnage @voidmalfoy @flxss-bxbblxs @alwaysreading @herondalesunsetcurve THANKS YALL I LOVE YOU MORE THEN I EXPRESS AND I DO NOT, I REPEAT, DO NOT DESERVE ALL OF YOU AND YOUR LOVE

[blackberry-gingham]

Got to be honest... I love the mermaidau! theme too. Could you pls give us a pt2 cause I need to know how is their rlp gonna evolve. (Feel like even writing a hole 2k word fanfic with this au and im not ashamed 😂)

(Pst, anon is referring to this request!)

Mwaaaha yeeees... YEEEEES !!!! I'm so glad you guys like this au lmao 😂😂 All I have to say is, I hope y'all can come through with this mermaid au when summer hits, bc that's my JAM 😤

Even if I don't get another mermaid au request until then, like please y'all, I'm begging you lol

But anyways, tumblr has decided that doing all four on here is too long, so I’m posting half now and I’ll link Paul and Ringo before the day’s over! (Also bc I lost like half of Ringo's story last night, and I have to rewrite it, so rip :') ) Enjoy!

Paul and Ringo this way!

George

It's quite a bit before George can see you again

He had to take up a job, even with school, and practice, and family, and friends, and the occasional gig... just to save up

But when he finally got enough to buy that bike... It was all worth it

It's almost as prized a possession as his guitar, and the very next day after purchasing it, he loads up a blanket and some food and heads off for the lake

The ride from home to the water is a bit long, but nothing he can't handle

At long last, he arrives at the tiny pier and he can hardly contain himself as he sets the kickstand and grabs his things

He rushes down and sets up shop

In his excitement, George has forgotten to consider whether or not you'll even show...

But he doesn't want to give up yet

So he waits

And waits

And after a few hours pass by, he decides he might as well have his lunch instead of skipping rocks and wading in the water all afternoon

George swims over to the edge of the pier and clasps into the plank to hoist himself up

But before he can complete the maneuver, he finds himself jerked back down again

It's gentle enough that he doesn't get submerged, but it's certainly enough to give him a start

He splutters and flails a little, turning around as quick as he can to see...

Oh, it's you...

George breathes a sigh of relief, even as your eyes watch him from just above the water line, your hair floating on the surface like an angel

Your eyes go wide in excitement, and you peak your head all the way above the water, giving a soft gasp of surprise

"It is you! I can't believe you came back!"

George's heart hammers in his chest, whether it's from the surprise, the physical activity, or something else... He doesn't know

"O-of course I am! I said I would, didn't I?"

You laugh, "So you did! ...By the way, what have you got up there?"

George looks over his shoulder to the picnic basket that's clearly in view, then back at you

He waves you over and pulls himself up at last

When he's turned around, you've disappeared and George's heart drops

Well, not for long. A moment passes, followed by a huge splash as you jump from the water to the pier

It's not a perfect jump, as you need to pull yourself up a bit, but you make it well enough

George is halfway through unloading the basket, but he finds himself incredibly distracted by your tail

He doesn't mean to be rude it's just... It's almost like you weren't real before now

The tail is nearly twice the length that human legs would be. It tapers all the way down to a fine and delicate point that flares out into a transparent, forked fin

There are smaller fins like this along the rest of your tail, George notes, providing gorgeous accents to your shimmering iridescent scales

You swish your tail behind you, feeling a bit shy

George shakes himself out of his stupor, "Oh, sorry! I just... Wow"

You huff a laugh and mumble a thanks, not quite out of the awkwardness

"Um, here, I brought you something", George hands you a carefully wrapped sandwich

You give it a sniff and wait for George to taste his first

It tastes fantastic. Unlike anything you've ever had before

George tells you it's called a "ham and cheese"

Before you know it, the two of you jump into a whole conversation about life above and below water

You talk all afternoon and into the evening. George, doesn't even realize how low the sun's set until he takes a moment to stretch and look up

"Oh, I suppose you should be going..."

"Yeah..."

George looks at you and then the water one more time

It's like a pool of gold out there, the orange and yellow reflecting so beautifully on the water

"Say, how about one more swim?", George nods towards the water

Needless to say, you both race in for a last dip

You swim laps around George as he move slowly through the water, and you find yourself growing bored rather quick

"Ugh, here hold on!", You laugh and roll your eyes as you latch onto George from beneath

He doesn't protest, and you tow him easily back and forth through the water

It's not as fast as you could go, but it's faster then George has ever achieved on his own

It's actually great fun, but all things must end, and after a few rounds you glide to a stop surrounded by golden ripples

You sigh and look around, letting him go, "Sorry, it's late. I didn't mean to get so carried away..."

George wades just inches away from you, "No no, it's alright! I um, I had fun"

"Really?", You smile

"Really...", George floats a little closer to you, and you can feel his warm breath caress your hair, "In fact, m-maybe we could do this again sometime?"

"Yeah?"

"Yeah..."

Before he even gives a thought to what he's doing George's lips meet yours halfway, pressing far softer then you'd expect from a rough teddy boy like himself

It's one of those kisses where you don't even have to think, or give subtle hints

Everything just feels right

Your heart does a flip when you separate, and George sticks by his promise

It gets to the point where you have a schedule to meet each other, getting the most out of your daylight hours

From now on, no more waiting

Just you, and him.

John

John's been visiting you for quite some time now, bringing you shiny things on occasion, but mostly just enjoying your company

You're on a first name basis and everything

It's strange almost, John feels quite special

After all, he might be the only lad in all of England to befriend a mermaid!

Although lately, he's been feeling... Different about you

He must be mad

But it's just...

You're so sweet, and kind, and you listen and understand him like no one else ever has before, an-

Ugh

He must be going mad

That would certainly explain why he's buying you a locket with his latest savings

It may be from a second hand store, but he knows you'll love it

The locket is shaped like a heart and made of brass

The metal is a bit tarnished but the small heart shaped ruby in the center is bright as ever

It's perfect

John takes it home and hides it away from Mimi

She doesn't know about you, but she has some suspicions about a girl...

That's certainly not something John wants to talk about, so he's trying to be as covert about you and him as possible

But before he can hand off his gift to you, he needs to sneak one of Mimi's pictures of him

She has a few up in the attic, which John is easily able to swipe and cut out to fit in your locket

There. Now it's perfect

John gets a good night's rest and heads out bright and early to your cove the very next day

He arrives to find you splayed out on a bed of shells and trinkets, sun bathing

"Hello birdy!"

You spring up and turn to face him, "Johnny!"

Patches of sand stick to your skin, shimmering like glitter in the sun

John whips off his leather jacket and shirt as he goes to sit beside you before removing his boots and socks as well

It's a bit of a custom for him ever since he started feeling comfortable around you

The beach is rather hot, yes, but more so, he likes that you make him feel confident enough to take all that off in the first place

You don't know this, but it's a huge sign of the trust he has in you

The two of you talk and catch up a bit on the few days you were apart

John tells you about school, and you about your adventures at sea

Both of you are equally fascinated about each other's worlds, and both wish a bit that they could live like the other does

You've offered to take John out to sea, but he's not to keen on wading that far out in the ocean

When the conversation starts to run dry, John remembers his gift at last

"Oh by the way, I brought you something..."

You perk up, not suspecting anything other then the usual shiny pebble or coin

But then again, John seems... Different

You could swear you see a blush climbing his cheeks

"I uh, saw this and thought of you...", He holds out an old, worn locket. The Ruby heart and tarnished brass flash and glint in the sunlight, mesmerizing you

You gasp softly, and reach for it slowly, as though you're dreaming

"Do you fancy it?", John asks nervously

"John, this is beautiful..."

You click the heart open and reveal a raggedly cut picture of John smirking back at you from behind a heart shaped lid of glass

You trace your finger along the picture's edge, a trance like glaze over your eyes

"I um, I thought maybe you could wear this one... You know, that way you could always have me with you when you go out to sea... Or... Something", John mumbles, wondering if he sounds even half as stupid as he thinks he does

He peaks over at you once, then twice as you look at it in silence

"It's alright, you don't have to-"

"Could you put it on me?"

John looks stunned, as though he's surprised you actually like his well thought out gift

"Uh, I- sure"

You hand him the necklace and turn

John lifts it over your head and lowers it slowly

The metal is warm from John's hands as it touches your skin, and John fastens the clasp in a jiffy

"There you are..."

You turn around again, eyes shining brightly with joy, the heart clasped in the palm of your hand

A knot forms in John's stomach, seeing you look so happy with him like that, and suddenly he feels sick

He has to say it

He knows be does

He has to tell you now, or it's going to kill him

And yet, if he does tell you, that might kill him too

"Ugh, I must be mad..."

You quirk an eyebrow, "Wha-?"

"I love you", John blurts it out as though it was tortured out of him

It's not very sweet, or romantic, or charming...

No, it's actually much more like he just spat on the sand and continued on

But you know John by now, and to you, it's more then enough

You put your hand over his and lean in to press a gentle kiss to his burning cheek

"I love you too Johnny"

John's breath hitches in his throat, and looks at you with a gaze he's never given any other woman in the world

"Really?" His voice is the barest of whispers

But you don't need to answer, John is already pulling you in for a kiss as he lays back on your small pile of treasure

It's not his first make out session, and it won't be his last

But with you? Right here, on the beach, in the warm sun, laying cozied up on his bare torso?

It's the one he remembers most, for all his life

[mmmonie]

Hi my other post? Got notes? And I already had this basically ready to go so………….? Here it is I guess! Also I’m so sorry for how long this is LOL…..I am incapable of shutting up once I get going so it’s under the read more for you…….(also?? thank you? for the followers uhm cheesed to meet you? 😳 lol)

This is basically what I imagine the manifestation of a demon's powers to be like??? I called it the “juvenile phase” in my other post so thats what im going with lol

Here’s some things I said in my first post that are relevant here, slightly edited. (I elaborate more on the different ways demons are born in that post and I think they’re pretty self explanatory, but u might wanna go read it just in case it’s not clear enough 😔 sorry): (link to first post)

* Demons have multiple forms, not just the two shown in game. All in all the brothers have 5, each becoming less and less humanoid. (Most demons only have 4) 

* Half/human born demons are more likely to have both a tail and wings in their first demonic form. Stronger demons like the brothers are merely showing off the strongest of the two, but everyone has both. (Again bc I think they’re sick as fuck lol) This is why the stereotypical devil in our world has both wings and a tail. 

*a demon's features can be influenced by what sin they are, but it’s not a hard or fast rule.**

***this does not apply to little Ds whose look is entirely dependent on their sin. They are an entirely separate conversation 😈 (I elaborate on this briefly at the very end LOL) 

* half/human born demons can have two sins assigned to them, though this makes them less powerful in both. Usually there is a more prominent sin. 

*It should also be noted fallen angels do not have a juvenile phase. While the powers they develop after the Fall are different, they already come prepared, having had intense restraint implemented in their training in the celestial realm. The only things they develop are tails and horns, which happens very quickly during the Fall. They still have the same instincts as demons lol they are just much better at maintaining control. 

*another note: I’m gonna use acronyms for our different types of demons after a while to save me some headache. They’re pretty self explanatory (Ex: half demon = HD) 

With that let’s begin, shall we? 

~~~

*All demons are born with innate magical abilities, the juvenile phase is just the manifestation of their sins and some of their power. Some powers do not come into fruition until much later in a demon's lifespan. (Will elaborate later) 

*They won’t have a complete hold on their powers after this either, it’s just like. The bare minimum of getting a grip so they don’t cause immediate damage LOL they have many years to get into the nuances. Magic to demons is about as easy as breathing, but it still comes with its own challenges. 

*Many of the powers that manifest are shaped by what kind of sin(s) they display. I’m gonna say the sin(s) developed depend on the individual rather than it being hereditary. Though there are powers that are inherent to all demons. (i.e. hypnotizing humans like in lesson 11-14)

*The beginning of the juvenile phase starts when a demon develops their horns, wings, claws and tails. 

*For almost every demon, the juvenile phase lasts about two or three weeks. A human born’s phase will immediately kick in the day after their ceremony. Because of a half demon’s heritage, their transition is delayed and will usually happen around “middle school” age. (However many thousands of years that is lol. Also imagine going through puberty AND growing a bunch of extra shit.........smh.) 

*Natural demons have it slightly easier, they go through this phase very early (around toddler age). They develop the nubs of their horns, wings and tail a while after they’re born. 

*However this is NOT easier for whoever is taking care of them. Demons that develop later are mostly self-sufficient, meaning you can leave them to rest a bit. Can't leave a baby alone for very long though, can you? Especially not when they’re hurtling objects around with their mind, or causing things to spontaneously combust. (Also imagine a regular baby during their teething phase……….now imagine a baby’s teething phase being ten times more itchy AND manifesting new powers. Congratulations on your very cranky and powerful baby, best of luck to you.)

*Parents take this in stride as it’s just how demon babies are. It is all very Addams family esque…. like awwww, our baby just tried to induce horrific hallucinations of our own deaths!!! 🥺🥰🤧 they grow up so fast!!!!

*HB and HD wings and things grow in very quickly. The nubs will sprout from the skin and then mature into wings and horns in just a few days. ND transitions are much more drawn out, taking about a week to complete. All the growth is very itchy for everyone though. 

*You know when you have an itch that just won’t quit or that you can’t reach, so you have to use some outside force to get some relief? Same concept here. Much like deer and their antlers, demons rub their horns and wings up against things to get to those spots they can’t get to themselves. It also has the added effect of encouraging growth and getting excess skin/keratin off them. Family members often help with preening and scratching. 

*There are special concoctions/spells to make the process easier and to help ease the itchiness. As well as products made for specific purposes, like to get at that space where your wings meet your shoulders lol 

*There are also things to pad horns. Having your baby demon impale your shins is no fun. Neither is having your best friend accidentally get stuck in the cabinet because their horns went through the shelf. 

*The first week and a half is usually when a demon is most active. They are encouraged to play fight, stretch their new wings and become familiar with their new instincts. 

•Play fighting is a way to help learn to readjust to their new strength. (and thank god demons are near impossible to kill lol they can get VERY rough.) It’s also considered a bonding activity. 

*Hunting instincts also come into play so it’s not uncommon to see a demon in their juvenile phase playing a really fucked up game of hide and seek with their loved ones (no one gets hurt. Probably <3) 

*These two skills also help with learning how to fly. A game of fucked up hide and seek in the forest is both fun and educational. 

*This is very much like when puppies' paws are too big for they got damn them, except y'know. with horns and claws. So expect some accidental scrapes and

*This is also usually the time where their sin(s) will manifest, along with their new powers. At this point this is where family comes in, as a newly developing demon is reliant on everyone around them to help them learn how to control their strength/powers. Taking care of a demon in their juvenile phase is a family bonding activity, and even those who are prone to being cold are a bit softer during this time. (A reminder that family can be anyone, not just blood related.) 

*The second half of their transition is more about conserving energy for the introduction of their final form.  

*Nesting instincts kick in and are important here, because any nest created will be that demon's home for a period of time. They won’t stray very far from wherever they’ve chosen to stay. Nearly all demons will just choose a comfortable place in their home to nest, however, some demons (i.e. demons like Levi) need a special place because of their final forms. They will be drawn there instinctively.

*A nest is just composed of soft material and sometimes extra objects. For example a greed demon might want shiny or precious objects around their nest. 

*This will also be the home of the loved one(s) taking care of their demon. They will go out and find anything the other one might need or want. A demon will only choose one or two others to take care of them at this time. Other family members are allowed to visit, but the chosen demon(s) stay with their struggling one for nearly the entire last half of this period. 

*It’s considered an honor to be chosen and it is a bragging point, especially if you have been chosen multiple times. 

*Despite what you might think, parental/domestic skills are very important to demons. They live a very long time, and it be a waste to treat their spawn poorly. They’re stuck with them for nearly an eternity, so you might as well try to do your best with them. Being able to showcase being chosen to whomever your courting is, how you say.............a little sexy. So being chosen multiple times? “Wow you’d be a great parent? Tell me more…..😳” 

*Demons will slowly spend more and more time in their nest as they approach the end of their phase. Growing extra things takes a lot of energy! Many demons end up mostly sleeping for the last couple days in preparation for the end. 

*Since they are so sleepy, this is the most outwardly cuddly most demons will be. Close family members are encouraged to come stay in the same space for a while. The demon will often be asleep, but waking up and playing games with them is a great way to bond. If you’re REALLY special you might end up being allowed to sleep in their nest for a bit. 

*The juvenile phase culminates when the demon reaches their final form (usually the fourth one.) Over this last half, they slowly grow more monstrous features. Scales, fur, claws, eyes, teeth, spines.........the whole lot! Anything and everything you can imagine. Each demon's final form is unique, though they do not get a decision as to what features they have. Final forms tend to be very large. 

*This is where they are taught how to use their glamor and how to piece themselves back into a form that’s easier to maneuver. Think of it like starting from the top and working your way down. 

*There are demons whose job it is to go mark down the details of every single final form. Things like what powers manifested, to how tall they are, their overall physical strength and what sin(s) they portray, etc. They are all recorded in the royal archives. It’s a bit like a right of passage, especially for younger demons and their parents. 

*Going back to the very top, some powers won’t manifest until after the juvenile phase. Some won’t even manifest until the demon has hit sexual maturity (which takes a MUCH longer time for demons.) This is true of almost every power that Lust develops except for perhaps an increase in their charisma/ability to charm. Demons who are assigned Lust are considered the late bloomers of the demonic world, as almost all other sins manifest more power right away. 

*Also relating to the top of this post: the reason Little Ds looks are biased on what sin they are is because they are pure concentrated forms of sin given life. They’re extracted from the souls of humans who committed sin, and used for grunt work/errand running. They develop their own personalities as they go, but it takes a bit so they’re kind of a blank slate until then.

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I was gonna be like oh treat for you here’s how the brothers dealt with Satan and his juvenile phase but this is long as FUCK already so I will make…...a separate post. Edit: SURPRISE! treat for u! heres the link if u want

Thanks for reading! Until next time ig?