#spn has well and truly possessed my brain

[finalgirlsamwinchester]

thinking about sam and mary. the parallels between young mary and sam, both desperate to escape from their families and hunting towards a 'normal' life (neither of them escape in the end). their respective partners, intended as a way out, end up reenacting a history of violence running through their family tree. jess dies like sam's mother, pinned to the ceiling in flames. john becomes samuel in mary's absence - the very hunter patriarch mary was running from. sam named after samuel her father - the same father who kisses her while possessed by a demon. a kiss that comes to fruition when said demon feeds his blood to a baby sam at the crib; a violation she 'allowed' for, that she is unable to stop, that destroys her in the end. azazel as the ghost of incest and csa haunting the campbell family line. when sam gets resurrected without a soul, it's grandpa he partners and hunts with (what is the price of a grandson, but an expendable cost in service of protecting a daughter you've failed?)

mary as the ghost haunting sam's family, the absence eating away at his brother and father. sam as the ghost of mary's destruction; she haunts her husband and other son through him. sam as a site of formative trauma for both john and dean, the catalyst for another cycle of patriarchal violence; from john to dean, from dean to sam. by protecting him, they revisit that trauma in circles. they can't save her, but they can protect sam. sam feels dirtywrong, long before he learns of his blood, because what is a ghost if not an evil to be hunted, trauma to be exorcised by flame?

the demon blood from mary's deal as sam's unbreakable cage. her blood curse forever marking him as abnormal, as prey to both hunters and demons alike.

she asks him, after her resurrection, didn't you get out? when he tells her - my family hunts, it's what we do - she grieves for him, for herself. mary is the question to which sam is the answer.

[blorbosondeck]

fic rec masterlist

canon divergent/finale fix its

Anamnesis

THIS! FIC! this fic lives in my head rent FREE it is so good and it makes so much sense in the narrative that the shitty finale concocted, as to why they wouldn't mention cas or anyone else and its just. so good and they write chuck in the most villainous way that i love!!!

"Chuck is depowered, Jack is the new god, and the world is free. Dean and Sam get into the Impala and chase down the miles on an endless highway, and their story is finally, finally their own to follow. At least, that's what Dean tells himself. But the diners and motels and painted interstate lines are blurring together and the smallest details keep catching at his brain like tiny fishhooks and he can't quite shake the feeling that not everything is exactly as it should be. Fix-it/alternate series finale. Canon-compliant through the end of 15.19."

Sunset Sound: Stairway to Heaven by @adhdeancas

GOD FUCKING CHRIST this is so good and sweet and im such a sucker for team ups and reunions!!! its 3:30 am rn and i just finished it and i love it SO much it made me laugh a lot and the last few chapters i had the stupidest grin just plastered to my face

The Closer the Star, the Greater the Parallax by @rocksalts​

repressed bastard dean submits to the mortifying ordeal of being known and receives the rewards of being loved but only after some miscommunication i LOVE this i read it last night and it’s a fast favorite. my interests have overlapped and i am INTO it

“When Dean sits down to watch some bullcrap Discovery Channel episode with Cas, he doesn’t expect to actually learn anything. Except, with Cas explaining, he makes an effort to connect the dots.”

Don't We All Deserve To Be Happy?

VERY sweet and a VERY good pick me up. all around feel good fic!!! 

"Post-canon fix-it, divergent from 15x19 where Jack stays and Dean doesn't die and Cas comes back and everyone is happy. Take a shot every time I'm salty about the finale."

Keep Your Love Alive

okay. okay okay okay this may be my favorite finale fix it just because of how well reasoned it is. like this feels what should have happened i love it SO much

"Dean gets to spend eternity sharing beers with Bobby on the Roadhouse porch and riding around in his Baby with Sam. He’s at peace… or he feels like he should be. But a few things nag at him: Where is Cas, and everybody else Dean had been hoping to see in Heaven? Why does he feel like he’s stuck in a loop, reliving the same memories over and over again? And who are the strangers wearing Sam’s and Bobby’s faces?"

The GoldenRod Revisions by @aethylas​

this is one of the most well written things ive ever read. the script format DID make it feel more real and honestly? this is better writing than this show deserves. the finale that could have been ♥️

“A rewrite of Supernatural’s final two episodes, expanded into a five episode arc - in which Chuck needs to be defeated, Castiel deserves to be saved, and the characters in this story get a very different ending.“

Ascend by @wanderingcas​ 

THEE finale fix it fic!!! written by the AMAZINGLY skilled and talented @wanderingcas !!! it’s 50k of angst and hurt/comfort and pure bliss

“Something in the world is wrong.

Demon activity is rising where mysterious black substance oozes and unusual ecological events are shaking the world. Dean, grief hanging on his shoulders, restlessly searches for answers that might lead him to the Empty… and to Cas.

But what Chuck wrote can’t be undone. The narrative thread pulls Dean along, forcing him to comply. Because once a story already has an ending, it can’t be rewritten.

Or can it?”

Things Happen (They Do, And They Do, And They Do) by THEE @sobsicles

i KNOW everyone has already recommended this and likely you’ve all already read it. but it has to go here bc REPRESSIOOOOOOOOON i LOVE this so much it is one of the most perfect things i’ve read. are you bisexual? did you have a kind of weird relationship with your best friend and not realize that how you felt about them wasn’t necessarily how other people felt about them and you were maybe a little bit in love with them but were too repressed to realize it? you’ll feel seen. maybe a little too seen

Closer (isn't close enough)

are you a sweet and sappy yet horny bastard? do you like cas exploding light bulbs? you will like this.

“the one where they finally talk about what cas said before the empty took him”

You and Your Husband

it is exTRMELY sweet!!! repression dean strikes again <3

"Five times Dean corrects someone about his relationship with Cas, and one time he realizes he doesn't need to."

Tall Grass

miscommunication and a slowburn! despite being written in 2017 and finished in 2018, it feels like a fix it. ft. plant obsessed cas <3 

Invictus

a LOVELY and short (relatively) finale fix it

“They saved the world. They're free. It's done.

Except it's not, and carrying on is the last thing any of them are thinking about.

They still have someone they need to save.”

Unchained Link

post finale- it’s a great case fic and i am compelled i want more!!!

"It's after the end of things. Life continues on while Dean is "livin it up" in heaven. But it's never that simple, is it? A freak occurrence sends Dean into another time stranded back on Earth. And he thought his hunting days were over. But, no worries. His knight in shining armor comes to the rescue. Hijinks, therefore, ensue."

fun and time unspecified

Ladies and Gentlemen, This is Love Potion No. 5

very funny and sweet! miscommunication at its finest ♥️

"Cas gets drenched with a mystery potion from the ‘love spell’ shelf and... Dean has a sneaking suspicion, angel or no— the spell may have taken effect. And Cas might be in love with Sam."

The Way We Were

Y'all. It is so good its a great mix of funny and serious- extremely fun to see dean as like a base bisexual

"Dean and Castiel pose as a couple to gain access to a gated community known as 'The Glen', a pleasant if secretive location that the boys believe might be linked to several dead bodies showing up over the years bearing signs of ritualistic sacrifice. All seems well until Dean's memory is affected from an incident during a solo exploration, leaving Dean convinced that their cover story is true. Castiel is left trying to resolve their case without taking advantage of an increasingly enthusiastic Dean"

While You Were Sleeping

this is basically just the movie but replacing sandra bullock with cas. this is my comfort movie and imo, one of the most perfect rom coms. the fic isn’t finished but i still have the tab open on my phone and i will straight up go back and re read it when i need a pick me up. 

aus/rewrites

The Harvelle Gospels: Offscript

i know everyone ever ( @jewishcharliebradbury ) has recommended this fic. and for good reason go fucking read it

“The Apocalypse is averted, the angels are in Heaven, and Jo is free from the threat of possession. Somehow it couldn't be farther from a happy ending.“

absolute riots

An Ineffably Profound Bond

i honestly would have put this in the finale fix it section! look. i know. i know you've been burned by crossover fics before. but this is Thee good omens/spn fic you want. its funny as hell and immensely satisfying. im weak for everyone working together tropes and that is this

"After Chuck sets 'The End' in motion, the remaining members of TFW make a miraculous escape. Not willing to waste any time, Castiel comes up with a plan to travel to one of the other worlds to try and get help from the angels there, but after a fight with Dean, it's the hunter who gets sent into an alternate universe,with seemingly no hope of return.

When a mysterious human with a heavenly weapon shows up in Aziraphale's shop, he and Crowley learn that their world is not the only one. Now it is up to them to decide whether or not they want to join forces with the human and help him save his world or simply find a way to send him home."

Somebody Up There Likes Me by @lafilleredige

cas is hit with a spell that turns his vessel into a woman, hijinks and sexuality crises ensue etc etc sam is a supportive and bitchy little brother and its all SO fucking funny and also. horny as hell i love it i love it i LOVE it

“’Dean doesn’t want to talk about your breasts, it’s making him uncomfortable because he hasn’t acknowledged the complex fluidity of human sexuality.’“

Stray Cat Strut

a long crack fic that IS one of the funniest things i’ve ever read and i can’t explain why. it’s so ooc but its so funny that i don’t care. if you need a laugh you gotta read this

"Sam and Cas are immediately in love with the adorable kitty they find outside the bunker door, and occupy their time planning how to convince Dean--who they believe is off sulking after a botched hunt--to let them keep their cat. Along the way, Dean learns to use a litter box and hears some confessions he maybe wasn’t supposed to hear, all while realizing just how much he loves Castiel.

Now all Dean has to do is convince Cas and Sam their new pet cat is actually him before they do something crazy--like neuter him!"

canon compliant or slight canon divergence

Give

by @doublestuffedimpala post season 7 episode 7, kind of ambiguous ending but truly a cas is happy to bleed for the winchesters fic

Punch Like Bones 

short, post 5x04 homoerotic moment that i wish we’d gotten

[katsidhe]

could you do 9.10 and 9.13 for episode reviews.

Love your takes btw.

9.10 Final Thoughts

well, well, well, if it isn’t my old friend season 9. God I love season 9. buckle in. 

Plenty of what season 9 tries to do with angel drama falls flat, but plenty of it doesn’t. It’s at its strongest when interrogating the ways that the angels are looking for personal purpose, rather than folding themselves into various suit-clad factions. In this episode, we have Gadreel, Abner, and Thaddeus, all with very different takes.

Thaddeus is the most boring of the three—a straightforward narcissist and sadist. (Lucifer will follow in his rockstar-impersonating footsteps in s12. SPN clearly has a dim view of the music industry.) We don’t care when he dies, and we aren’t meant to.

Abner’s found a family, and he’s let go of revenge. He’s clearly found peace and happiness—but it’s stolen.  I’m ambivalent about this. I guess I could take his word that his vessel was abusive and therefore deserves to have been permanently body-snatched, and I guess I could believe him when he says his new family loves him, even though they clearly don’t know what he is or what he’s done. His regard for humanity as something other than a project is… uncertain. Even if everything is as sunny as he explains to Gadreel, there is fundamental selfishness and short-sightedness here. Get what you want, Abner says, and never let go.

Gadreel asks Abner if his vessel is happy. This reveals both Abner’s scorn for his vessel, and Gadreel’s uncomfortable awareness of and respect for Sam (and his bartender vessel, who Gadreel stares at, and who accepts Gadreel back easily).

Gadreel! OF COURSE Gadreel’s gotta be the scapegoat for Lucifer’s release, HAHAHAH. I love him to pieces, oml. Seriously, the Sam parallels could not BE more blatant. I’ve talked about this before, that it makes the earned antipathy between them all the more alarming, all the more visceral. The big sticking point is that Gadreel’s years of pointless torture came prior to his “redemption” arc, rather than as a consequence of it. Gadreel has all of s5 Sam’s despair and helpless anger and self-loathing, all of his drive to set things right at any price, and all of it is amplified by his trauma.

Sam and Gadreel’s relationship is defined by its liminal spaces. Gadreel threatens to tear Sam apart, but he does not, even when he is tortured. He locks Sam away in a dream rather than force him to watch him kill, or to suffer. But when Sam forces Gadreel out, Gadreel leaps instantly on telling Sam he is weak, reciting back Sam’s fears and Gadreel’s own. This reads like Gadreel is aiming quite a lot of his own self-pity and self-hatred at Sam.

Cas’s murderous rage at Gadreel when his identity is revealed is fun. It shows that Heaven’s PR team did a good job, for one thing. But Cas is furious because it’s specifically Lucifer. And the Apocalypse, and all the attendant suffering, his and Dean’s and Sam’s. It’s a personal wrath.

“Stupid for the right reasons…” oh, Cas, your scarcity of positive human role models is showing. Also, Cas’s particular brand of reassurance here isn’t actually something Dean has a problem with. He expresses regret over having been tricked—he says he’s stupid, he says he got played—but he’s never in doubt that his intentions were good. He’s never in doubt that he did the righteous thing. He’s never in doubt that he’d do it again.

Dean apologizes to Cas for barring him from the bunker. (Sam will not receive an apology.) Cas compares what Dean did to Sam to what Cas did by trusting Naomi. There’s a key difference here. Cas’s moral compass is not the problem; it’s his critical thinking skills.

Crowley, Cas, and Dean are a hilarious trio. (Also, I really hope that Cas’s pimpmobile got to Heaven too, like the Impala.)

Crowley being genuinely sorry that Kevin’s gone and his willingness to risk his life to help Sam are the best two moments of the generally weak Crowley-has-human-blood plot line. They feel earned. [also Crowley’s ‘I told Kevin he should’ve run!’ is both accurate, funny, and sad.]

Let’s talk 4.21 parallels! I mean, first, the glaringly obvious: Sam locked down to be purged of something supernatural; Sam suffering; Dean unable to bear Sam’s tortured screams; a very atmospheric fan. Dean walking away.

and then, of course, there’s “at least he dies human.” Right off the bat, Dean tells Cas he’s going to kill Gadreel. Cas, concerned, says that this will kill Sam too; Dean, sounding tortured, says he knows. Now, obviously, Dean doesn’t kill Sam. He doesn’t even get particularly close. But it’s really interesting that this is the first thing Dean brings up! He declares unprompted that he’s ready to kill Sam rather than leave him possessed. Which is both a recapitulation of the save-him-or-kill-him mantra, and an ironic twist on the decision Dean made in 9.01. Then, Dean knew Sam would rather die than be possessed, but had him possessed anyway. Now, Dean has decided instead that Sam must die because he is possessed. Obviously Dean’s opinion on the possessing entity has changed in the meantime: Sam’s hasn’t, but Sam’s isn’t what matters. 

Dean reaches new levels of PEAK IRONY when he declares that Cas should possess Sam too. Cas has to actually point out that Dean can’t, in fact, volunteer Sam’s permission. Because apparently Dean had forgotten, lmaooo. Crowley, on the other hand, is happy to oblige. Dean directs Cas to burn Sam’s tattoo off.

The language of this entire scene is so sexual. I mean, it’s Crowley, of course it is, double entendre is his first language. But this theme recurs again and again. Here it is just more pointed than usual. It is queasy.

Gadreel has Sam trapped in a Dean-type happy place—a hunt with ghouls and cheerleaders, no organic produce to be found. And I don’t think it’s because Gadreel doesn’t understand what Sam likes. I think it’s because Gadreel’s aim was for Sam to feel comfortable, not blissful. It smacks of Hallucifer, just a bit—using the verisimilitude of Dean’s louder moods rather than trying to appeal directly to Sam’s contentment, because of his always questionable, always a question, sense of reality. If things were too smooth, too cheerful, Sam might just be suspicious. Sam is easier to trick by proxy. 

The HORROR of this episode for Sam: Gadreel washing someone’s blood off of Sam’s hands. Crowley pushing needles into his brain. Sam’s body and life as a bargaining chip as Gadreel threatens to kill him, and then as Dean threatens to kill him right back. The quiet heartbreak as Sam remembers Kevin’s death, as he realizes the magnitude of Dean’s betrayal. But the worst part of it, I think, is somehow still Sam’s face when Crowley comes to get him in the dream where Gadreel stashed him. How his expression just crumples as Crowley tells him he is trapped in a lie, that his mindscape is once again a prison, that he truly cannot trust his reality. The sheer devastation of this on top of Sam’s history, plus the knowledge that Dean did this—and he pulls himself together and puts his foot on Gadreel’s neck and casts him OUT anyway. Sam Fucking Winchester.

and then the Bridge Scene. The lighting, the staging… it’s fucking gorgeous. It’s one of those scenes where I knew as I was watching it for the first time, seven years ago, that it was going to be something. I held my breath and still hold my breath. I can’t take my eyes off the way that Sam is shaking slightly, the entire time. The way he can barely meet Dean’s eyes but he does it anyway. He SAYS HIS PIECE, says it clearly, says it with an even tone despite what he’s gone through, despite the holes in his head that were healed seconds ago.

I love the gentleness between Sam and Cas here. I love knowing that 9.11 follows this. I love that there is no question that Cas will leave with Dean—he is staying with Sam, to heal and support him, even after he spent this episode mostly reassuring Dean.

Dean does not start this conversation to apologize. He starts out with the intent to DELIBERATELY egg Sam on: “come on, let’s hear it.” It’s an incitement, because Dean wants Sam to act angry, so that Dean can feel more justified in leaving. Sam does not rise to the bait.

Dean has an excuse for every point Sam has: I had no choice, you were dying, it’s not in me, he saved your life. He says, “I did a bad thing with bad consequences and I would 100% do it again, anyway, bye.”

And then the most infuriating thing: Dean is in the wrong, so he tells the person he’s wronged, ugh, I’m just such an awful poisonous person, I’m going to burn for this. It’s so clearly wrong-headed. Intentional or not, it’s such an obvious invitation for Sam to comfort him that it might well have been embossed. If this were in e.g. season 15, or if the crime he’d committed had been less awful, I can easily hear Sam’s reassurance: no, Dean, I promise you’re a good person, we all make mistakes. It is the most toxic way possible to frame a potential apology.

The textual theme of Dean-as-poison (and, for that matter, the consequence of Kevin’s death vs. the initial crime of the possession) is an intentional muddying of the waters: Crowley, Cas, and Dean himself all bring it up in some fashion, linking some fundamental aspect of Dean himself rather than Dean’s choices to Kevin’s death. Crowley is trying to be cutting; Cas is trying to be supportive; Dean is both excusing himself and camouflaging that fact in his exhausting self-loathing. There is a complicated interplay of what the text says about Dean’s guilt and what it condemns; this pattern continues throughout s9, and reaches its apex in the next several episodes. Dean’s love as a condemning feature rather than a redeeming one is one of my favorite things about SPN, and s9 has it in HIGH gear.

But, here, at least, Sam doesn’t rise to this bait either. “Don’t go thinking that’s the problem, ‘cause it’s not.” The problem is obviously, achingly, exhaustingly clear. Sam’s spelled it out in this very conversation: you tricked me. You lied to me. You got me possessed when I was willing to die. But Dean, and a fair portion of the audience, can’t hear it. So he doesn’t. And they don’t, and they pretend that this line is some sort of puzzle! a cliffhanger on a conversation unfinished! when it was the conclusion, not the beginning.

image that is now inextricable from 9.10

[samwinchesterism]

it literally, truly breaks my brain that ppl think misha collins’s lucifer was good or, somehow, better than jared’s lol. like it was literally so bad? so so bad. like it was just a rough mark pellegrino impression with some added chaos -  except when mark does it, it works because ......... it’s his own face and mannerisms and they’re natural to him (and mark!lucifer was still kinda menacing in the s5 way in 11x09 but that quality disappeared quickly when mish took over lmao). like casifer has his moments of being alright (e.g. 11x14) but oof it’s just not great overall lol. the writing is partly to blame but pellegrino could make it work even in the shitty later seasons when everyone was truly sick of lucifer (e.g. the sam resurrection scene in 13x21). misha did non-cas characters well in the earlier seasons, e.g. jimmy or meta!misha or endverse!cas, but the later seasons are just not .... good lol 

it’s actually annoying that ppl seem to dislike jared’s lucifer just because it doesn’t like..... ape the s7 hallucination version of the character like misha’s did, without remembering that jared’s lucifer was literally the literal blueprint along with s5 mark (and s7 was not the real lucifer). when jared did endverse!lucifer there had been about....1 scene with pellegrino’s lucifer at that point in the show, so if they changed lucifer’s character in later episodes/seasons, which they did, then that’s literally not jared’s problem because again he was basically the blueprint for the character in s5 lol. 

as for the difference between the s5 lucifers (mark and jared), in my view it’s like how a person will carry themselves differently wearing a t-shirt and sweats (non-sam vessel) vs. wearing bespoke evening-wear (sam vessel). jared’s approach that an entity will appear to act differently depending on the vessel that it’s possessing, particularly an entity like lucifer that has a perfect vessel, makes 100% sense with lucifer and with the mythology of the show at that point (he expressed this at a con way back in like 2010) and at any rate to me is a lot more interesting than aping another actor’s mannerisms with just some added...weirdness lmao

basically ppl like to downplay jared’s interpretation when he had a thoughtful approach that made sense with the s5 version of the character (a truly menacing and thoroughly non-human villain that wanted to project power and didn’t consider himself to be the bad guy). more than that, sam is lucifer’s perfect vessel - back when that mattered, i.e. better times - and, more than that, endverse!lucifer specifically is lucifer victorious. to some extent any lucifer that’s possessing sam is lucifer victorious, incl. in swan song, because that’s lucifer in the vessel that he wants to be in: he doesn’t really need to be as scheming or cunning because he already is exactly where he needs to be (esp in endverse where he has literally won the apocalypse). idk man when characters talk up lucifer as the prince of darkness, the adversary, the deceiver........can u really tell me with a straight face that casifer channeled any of that power compared to the other versions lol

and honestly like.... the scene in the garden in 5x04 is a certified iconic spn scene and 5x22 is near-universally considered to be the best spn episode critically in all 15 seasons, and it only works that well because the switch from sam to lucifer then back to sam at the end is convincing and gripping, and because the threat that sam!lucifer poses is convincing, because that’s the crux of the entire episode. obv swan song excels because every single other element is great too (including jensen ofc), but still it would not have worked out that well without the solid sam/lucifer performance at its core

[im-like-if-a-girl]

*THE* mean-girl-dean-girl's Supernatural reboot MEGAPOST!

I'm gonna stick a little "keeping reading" here because hoooooo boy, this is a very long post.

Let's start with

Plot

Season 1

Dean kills John while they are out on a hunt in a crime of passion, but Dean doesn't remember because he blacked out. Cue Dean going to Stanford to get Sam and tell him "Dad's on a hunting trip... and he hasn't been home in a couple days."

The audience doesn't know what happened to John, but slowly figures it out with Dean and Sam as Dean slowly remembers what happened that night.

The entire first season, the boys are following the trail John left and fighting monsters as well. They find out Dean was with John, Sam realizes Dean has an unreliable memory, they have heart to hearts about their childhood and the fire, they find John's body, "how could you kill Dad?" but maybe Dean didn't kill dad, whooaaaaaa, misdirection.

It was actually good ole yeller eyes (Azazel) and he made it look like Dean killed John.

Okay, now let's move on to the first episode

Not sure how the opening would work, I would like the story of the fire to be revealed over the course of the first season, but maybe the opening scene could be a little bit of an establishing character relationships and backstory, idk, I haven't thought that far yet.

I'm thinking maybe it's like, Dean gets back to a motel room covered in blood and he listens to a voicemail on his phone from John saying he was on a hunt or something, I don't really know lol.

HOWEVER

I do know that after the intro rolls, we get a scene of Sam waking up to his alarm and "Nine to Five" by Dolly Parton starts playing.

Y'all know where this is going.

Cue a montage of Sam's normal Stanford college life (him sitting through lectures, walking through the campus with friends) spliced with scenes of Dean absolutely slaughtering a nest of vampires (or some other monsters, whatever works best.)

But

Now onto

Characters!!! (And descriptions)

Dean Winchester

Some lovely person on this site made edits of Dean with platinum blond hair and it made me feel some kind of way so we're doing that, homie's gonna have platinum blond hair

Side note about the hair, later when the brothers are running from the FBI he dyes it a dirty blond/light brown (insert jackles hair color controversy here) as a disguise.

He also gets tattoos because we were robbed.

Speaking of tattoos, concept: when Dean comes back from Hell, all of his tattoos are gone. His body is a clean slate, devoid of tattoos, scars, etc. So he gets his tattoos done all over again, which he doesn't mind because he made some bad, drunk tattoo decisions in his youth.

(And before you ask, yes, he does get one for Cas, either a bee or Cas's name in enochian, something cute.)

Dean goes to therapy after Sam gets sent to the Cage.

It's actually court mandated because he got in trouble, lol, he would never go to therapy on his own.

Along with the hair, Dean gets to be the grade A twunk we all know he is.

Sam Winchester

His hair gets longer in every scene he's in

No jk, but imagine

King of Microaggressions

Sam starts off like the sweetheart he is in season 1 but in later seasons he starts enjoying killing a little too much...

It's that demon blood, ba-by!!!

He brings up issues of morality to Dean, i.e. killing monsters who aren't hurting anyone. (Yes I know this is contradictory to my previous statement, but these two facets of Sam can and will coexist.)

Sam and Jess's relationship is explored further, meaning we'll need to start with a different inciting incident, but that's fine, I think everyone can agree fridgings are *(thumbs down)*

Sam doesn't truly know what happened the night of the fire until later, and then he understands why Dean is so protective of him.

Jess

She gets to live beyond the first episode

She is also trans

No, I don't feel like I have to explain myself and I won't 💜

She urges Sam to join Dean in a search for their brother, kind of gets pulled into the hunter lifestyle by association lol.

She dies on a rusty nail after fighting vampires on a routine hunt with Sam

No jk!!!

But imagine....

She's amazing and I love her and Lucifer also uses her as leverage against Sam and possesses her because I think that'd be cool.

She supports Sam 100% and also she and Dean are buddies, pals if you will.

She meets Cas Thee El and immediately she Knows, that is a homosexual.

She dies still so that we can have a Saileen Endgame but she's not dying the first episode or in a fridging. Not on my watch.

Castiel

He gets to keep his raw, light-fixture-exploding power.

I want more of that "I pulled you out of hell, I can throw you back in" energy except over dumb shit like Dean not cleaning up after himself.

He looks like a Dilf in every scene he's in, yeah, that's right, dilf with a capital D for *(GUNSHOTS)* *(gets sent to horny jail)*

Claire

She gets pink hair

And more time with Cas

And maybe a nose piercing

Feel like she should be able to kill a couple angels onscreen, punch a couple homophobes

She gets to meet Jack and teaches him swears and fun slang words.

She deserves it.

Jack

I says "that's my baby and I'm proud."

Jack starts off as a baby, but like Amara he grows up super quickly.

Like, baby to 11 year old in a couple days or less.

This is because Jack's emotional age on the show is on par with that of a 5th grader.

It's at this point when he's a young kid that he runs away from the Bunker and shenanigans ensue.

It's also at this point that Dean threatens to k*ll him.

(Still not sure if I want that in my Supernatural (threatened infanticide? In my Supernatural? It's more likely than you think) but we'll see. We'll see.)

Throughout a majority of season 13, Jack is like an 11 y.o. kid

Season 14 he's like a 16 y.o. teenager

Season 15 he's 21, you get the picture.

Listen, I love Alex Calvert a lot. He's great.

But Jack is a child and should be a child.

Kelly Kline

Kelly, baby, stay right where you are, you're perfect.

Eileen

SHE DOESN'T DIE

SHE GETS TO BE IN THE FINALE BECAUSE SHE'S AMAZING AND I LOVE HER.

BLURRY WIFE WHO? I ONLY KNOW SAILEEN ENDGAME!

She teaches Claire and Jack swears in sign-language. Castiel is not impressed.

John

J*hn W*nchester stans, DNI.

He's dead.

We only see him in flashbacks and only sometimes hear his voice in voice overs.

He's not "down the road" from Dean in Heaven, in fact he instead gets to wander around in some Purgatory like Hell for the rest of his time :)

People who get to say "fuck" on the show:

Cas (but only Once)

Jody

Bobby

Now onto other things

I want more of

Ghostfacers

(they need more screentime because I love them)

Dean/Benny

We know they had a thing.

They definitely had a thing.

Demon Dean

Again, I feel like more should've been done with this. All that build up for what, 2 episodes? was not utilized well at all.

Dean's Bisexuality

Straight Dean truthers DNI, my Supernatural is a show about love and being true to yourself

You think Supernatural is a show about 2 straight brothers fighting monsters?

Naw bitch, this is a show about the Gay Experience

He will get to have relations with men on this show.

Of course, only after John dies does he, y'know, display it. Maybe he kisses Cas on his dad's grave just to fuck John over, make him roll in grave.

We all agree John would be/is a homophobe piece of shit, right?

Okay, glad we're on the same page.

Dads

3 men and a baby with Jack is what I'm saying.

I love it when the Trio are father-figures to younger troubled characters they see themselves in, even better if it's like reluctant-but-loving father figure, oh, that trope gets me every time :'^)

Dadstiel and DadDean are my favorites, but I like it when Sam plays "Uncle Sam" to kids too lol.

"Fellas, is it gay to want a tight knit family with your husband, his son, his vessel's daughter, your brother, his wife, your cop mother figure and her wife and their adopted daughters? Asking for a friend."

Garth

Biggest flaw of Supernatural was underutilizing Garth.

I will never not be bitter that Garth was only in like, 7 episodes out of the whole 15 season series.

Every episode with Garth gets immediately 5 times better.

I love Garth.

Follow ups on characters who had entire episodes featured around them and then just... vanished???

This is mostly about Jesse, the magic kid whose imagination ruled an entire town like, his daddy was a demon and nothing came of that kid??? Only one episode about him?? No follow up???

KID CAN MANIPULATE REALITY AND WE'RE NOT GONNA GET A FOLLOW UP ON THAT?????

Uh, there was that one episode with Ennis the guy whose girlfriend was killed by a monster? I think?? Who we never see again, that was weird.

Tamara from season 3, episode 1.

And of course-

Cassie

She was so cool, and then we never saw her again :////

She gets to be a badass.

Religious imagery

As a former Catholic school student who has become for the most part, disillusioned with religion, religious imagery in TV shows like Supernatural make my brain go "brrrrrr."

Fun episodes!!!

Like, after season 6 or so, there's a drop in funny episodes

I'm talking Changing Channels, The French Mistake type stuff. (Scoobynatural is an outlier and should not be counted.)

So anyway

In my version we would have more fun episodes

I'm thinking

GENDER-SWAP EPISODE, BABY!!

(why they didn't do that in the original, we'll never know.)

An episode where Dean gets to wear eyeliner

That's it, end of post.

I want less

Racism

Yeah I feel like this is self explanatory, nearly every reoccurring character in SPN is white, and black side characters normally die in the episode they first appear in, or they'll be featured as a villain (Uriel, Raphael, Billie, etc)

Also there's a lot of... uh... asian fetishism featured in the show (what with "Busty Asian Beauties) that's really gross, also Kevin was a bit of a stereotype...

Also also it's super yucky how they kill the gods from other religions like???? Uh??? That's super disrespectful, let's not do that????

I know Supernatural is like, inherently racist because monsters are a separate race that are seen as some dangerous "other" that must be eradicated by hunters in a form of genocide-

Okay we won't get into that but

Still

Stop killing all your POC

Fridgings/Unecessary murders of female characters

I know Supernatural starts with a fridging, so this will be a hard thing to remedy, but

One death that really pissed me off was the death of Charlie

Yeah, that was pointless and we're not doing that. Charlie gets to live and be an awesome aunt to Jack.

And also Claire

Charlie Bradbury Superiority

Charlie and Garth get to meet because they're nerd/geek solidarity.

British Men of Letters

I fucking hate these guys

They're "litcherally" the worst.

The worst part is that the actors they have playing the British AREN'T. EVEN. BRITISH.

And you can tell

Uh, and that's all for now, I'll add more later.

tag list for people who liked my "if this post gets one like I'll post my SPN reboot masterpost" post.

@darianyunidi @sarasidlesaid @crazybananaalpaca @playfulpanthress @ultfreakme @fififeelsmellow @heller-char @luna8eaton @princessmeganfire @insanebot109 @queenofnightsnow @mongoose-underthehouse

Thank you for the support, hope the wait was worth it.

[fanfictiongreenirises]

Fic Writer Interview

thank you @batbirdies for the tag 💚💚💚 

Name(s): fanfictiongreenirises, iris, irises,,, honestly, whatever shortened form of my url you liked ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ 

Fandom(s): rn i’m mostly in the batfam. i started off on tumblr mainly in spn and then went to hamilton and other musicals, then into marvel,, and i don’t think i’ll ever truly leave any fandom i was in?

Where you post: AO3, and sometimes I cross post to tumblr (altho now that the amazing @sassydefendorflower has shown me how easy it is to post from ao3 to here, i think i’ll be doing it more often :D)

Most Popular One Shot (by kudos): Grapevine

In which Dick is hospitalised ^~^ (I’m constantly surprised by how much more popular it is than other fics of mine 😂)

Most Popular Multi-Chapter (by kudos): deep roots (are not reached by the frost)

In which Dick gets de-aged and I hurt him emotionally ^~^

Favourite story you’ve written so far: 🤔 I really liked writing my Possession fic, and I feel like Ghosts will always hold a special place in my heart ^~^

Fic you were nervous to post: Ghosts, definitely, because it was my first fic in the fandom, and also the possession fic 😂 

How do you choose your titles?: i have a little doc of lyrics that i vibe with and think will work well as titles, so sometimes it’s from that. other times it’s just me poking my brain until it delivers something skdfh 

Do you outline?:For chapter fics, yes (kinda). And sometimes for one-shots if I have a very specific idea and I know I’ll forget it, I do. My outlining is more like a series of dot points that later become either sections or chapters. For one-shots, I don’t really. (I used to for every fic which I feel was why I didn’t write as much as I could’ve for marvel and ham because I was too busy trying to plan it out to perfection.) 

Complete: 81

In-Progress: 1

Coming soon/not yet started: i have like 9? wips on my laptop rn but i don’t really know when i’ll get round to most of those. i’m in the process of rereading deep roots so i can write the next chapter 😂  and the batfam server i’m on is doing a month of prompts in january so i’m hoping to try those in the second half of the month

Prompts?: i’m not really taking any requests atm but maybe in the future ^~^ if the batman bingo happens again next year, i think i’ll sign up for that and take prompts for my squares again because that was really fun this year

Upcoming work you’re most excited about: i’m mostly finished with my last batman bingo square so i’m hoping to post that sometime this week. 

I tag @ckbookish @aeligsido @dirigibleplumbing @irnhero @dottie-wan-kenobi @geminibabyhere @huilian @sassydefendorflower @penguinwithitsarseonfire (no pressure to anyone ^~^) 

[durenjtmusings]

10 Baby Facts for SPN Fic Authors

[I swear this is not a rant - it ISN’T. Honest.]

It is actually kind of cool to realize that you possess specialty knowledge that may be of use to others. Stuff that you didn’t really KNOW you knew, until, of course, you are reading along in a fic and something the author describes (or the character says) brings your brain to a screeching halt. “That’s not right – it can’t possibly happen that way…” And then you go and do actual research to back up your gut knowledge. This little FAQ is the result of one such realization.

My dad fixed antique and classic cars for a living from 1964 – 1978, owning his own showroom for 3 years near the end of that time. Born in 1966, I grew up playing in old cars, hiding in floorboards and exploring them to my heart’s content. Our family car for several years was a 1966 Thunderbird, but when dad went to car shows, we rode in whatever he wanted to show off. I’ve been in rumble seats, hard top convertibles, cars with windshields that laid down flat, and cars with no roof, doors, or walls of any kind. My 1st car was a fully restored 1966 mustang. Without really realizing it, I soaked up a LOT of inherent understandings about older cars. The information below is based in that knowledge, backed up with some internet research.

The following is true about Baby (the character in SPN, not necessarily the actual cars that play her): 

1) Compared to most modern sedans, Baby is BIG. Like REALLY BIG. She is 17 and ¾ feet long (5.4 meters) and 7 feet 8 inches wide (2.03 meters). Allowing for door thickness on either side and the gaps between doors and bench seat, I’m betting the front seat is a little over 5 feet wide. Given basic geometry and human skeletal limitations, this means it is not possible for the passenger to have their head resting against the passenger door/window AND place their hand on the driver’s thigh. If the passenger is in this position, the driver can,  at best, entwine fingers with the passenger’s outstretched hand. That’s IT (even with Sam’s monkey arms). Sitting up straight, yes. Slumped over, no. On the plus side, this is why the guys can, in fact, get some sleep in her (and have fun in the back seat).

2) Despite how big Baby is, she is kinda short. Baby is only 54 inches high (4’6” or 138 cm). INSIDE the car, she is slightly less than 4 feet tall total. This means that the following actions WILL make you bump your head (or butt or hands or feet) on the ceiling unless you are very very slow and careful: climbing over the back seat, straddling someone’s lap, taking off your pants or t-shirt (unless nearly lying down in the seat), and lunging across the front bench seat to attack someone bodily. And you will look graceless doing it. [Ahem, trust me on these, I KNOW.] Additional negative modifiers for Sam due to height.

More below the cut.

3) Baby HATES crappy roads. Her big body has an all steel frame and body panels plus a very large engine system. Baby is HEAVY. She weighs a *minimum* of 3704 lbs empty. With equipment and the boys in her, she is over 2 tons. Oh and Baby is LOW. Her ground clearance is slightly less than 6 inches. This means an 8 inch deep pot hole (like the one in episode 11.01, above) can bottom out her axle and stop her in her tracks.  She SUCKS on rough terrain. Oh, and getting her OUT of said hole? Will require a JACK and a lot of swearing. (Baby is rear-wheel drive – her front wheels aren’t getting her out of anywhere). There was NO way the boys lifted her out of that hole in that episode (especially since they showed up in the next scene NOT covered in mud).

4) Baby is, in fact, good to have in a wreck. That all steel frame means she can practically bounce off of most modern cars. You’ll note they use large SUVs and tractor trailer trucks to hurt her. The fact that she makes it through the bumps and bruises she does is relatively accurate. In addition, Baby’s model had shoulder* seat belts in the front driver and passenger sides ‘standard’. Now this doesn’t mean the guys have to wear ‘em, or that Dean/John didn’t take ‘em out, but they were a standard safety measure. If you are wearing them, however, all movement described in 1 & 2 above is even MORE limited/complicated. Wearing them should keep you from getting thrown out of the car in an accident. Without them - you are the rock in a slingshot, out you go.

5) Baby’s model ONLY had a full, flat, smooth bench seat all the way across (front and back). She should NOT be drawn or described with a split front seat or (shudder) bucket seats of any kind. Sliding across this kind of seat from one side to the other was, in fact, a fun game for us as kids. Again, this makes her relatively ideal for napping…kinda. The backwards tilting angle is weird to sleep on and the seat itself is narrow front to back. it isn’t ideal, just possible.

6)  Baby’s gear shift is on the steering column (and she is an automatic). While there is a hump in the floor boards for the transmission, there is exactly zero to climb over for anyone who might be…shifting positions for activities in the front seat. In fact, given #1 above, it is possible for three grown adults to sit in the front seat, although the floor bump makes the middle person uncomfortable (unless they are short). Leg crowding and hip/elbow bumping will occur, but it can be done without too much discomfort. This means Baby can seat 6 with only mild discomfort (and in fact, has seat belts for 6 standard - see #4 above). You could do 7 if the four in the back are small (or someone lays across the other three – What? I’ve done it). OK, if later season Sam is in the front seat, the person in the middle better be Claire or Jody.

7)  Baby, as portrayed on screen, has lots of “optional” features. Most likely, John and Dean have been regularly ‘upgrading her’ over the years. For example she has “all vinyl interior” (standard was cloth and vinyl combined). The extra headlamps in early seasons are another example (and of course the trunk modifications). The ‘67 impala came with a wide variety of transmission and engine options. Even before the Season 1 finale, Baby likely had a “non-standard” engine system. Who KNOWS how powerful a system Dean put into Baby in the FIRST reconstruction (because, trust me, she needed a new engine) and what he might have done since then.

8)  Baby is OLD school rock and roll. *NEW* for the 1967 model year was the option of a tape deck – an 8 track tape deck. Dean’s ‘compact cassette’ deck is an after-market modification, likely sometime after John bought it in 1973. The compact cassette player is not “authentic” or “original” for Baby. (Although Dean may say or think so, he, in fact, knows better.) John likely listened to 8-tracks or to just the radio if the previous owner hadn’t put an 8-track in her.

9)  Baby is EXPENSIVE to maintain: > At best, Baby gets between 10-15 miles to the gallon (4.26-6.19 kpl), depending on the size of the engine Dean put in her most recently (and the tweaks he has made to it). As a corollary, Baby’s top speed is between 95-130 mph (152-209 kph) also depending on the engine. Top speed is inversely proportional to gas mileage. The bigger/faster engine Dean uses, the crappier the gas mileage. > Baby’s engines – ALL of them – are designed for ‘leaded’ gas. To get the most out of her, Dean has to regularly give her additives. > At this point, parts for Baby are either original ‘leftovers’ from the manufacturer (and very expensive) or from junk yards (used) or from online specialty stores (or Dean machines them himself). Glass, in particular, is going to be a special order. This means that ANY fic you write can include gripes about the COST of Baby (or the challenges in finding parts for her). Really, If I was FBI/enemy hunting Dean, I’d haunt the 67 Impala online groups  - which is where Dean’d go to find parts for cheap. They’d all know each other – classic car enthusiasts are a small close-knit community.

10)  Baby needs LOTS of regular maintenance. The mileage on baby, at this point, is almost a moot number. She’s had at least 2 new engines and one new transmission. She’s had just all sorts of parts replaced. Dean can tell you what’s still truly original, but for the most part, consider only the mileage you see from seasons 2 on when considering wear and tear. That said, Baby is FIFTY years old this season. Yet, as depicted, her interior and her engine are PRISTINE. Dean must spend TONS of time regularly detailing her inside and out. I mean LOOK at the carpets in the image for #5-6 above. There is NO MUD or dirt anywhere. The dashboard isn’t all faded or cracked from sunlight, and the vinyl hasn’t any rips or stains. Now, granted, likely most of that was all replaced with as new as Dean could get in 2006, but still, it takes a LOT of work to keep a car looking like that even if you keep her under a cover in the garage all the time. Baby is an actively working classic car, with the added bonus of blood and other nasty goo all over her on a regular basis. Any time a fic writer needs something for Dean to do, he can be working on Baby. There is ALWAYS something for him to be doing. [Heaven forefend he lube the damn door hinges.]

Bonus Facts: Baby is HOT. No, I mean it, all black vinyl seats and steering wheel sitting all day in the sun – is scorching hot. Like “I can’t touch anything without yelping” hot.  The 67 Impala had air conditioning as an option, so the guys likely have it, but it will still take a while to cool her down in the summer – especially in the southwest.  She will likely also take a bit of time to heat up from dead cold in the winter – especially for those in the back seat. And she isn’t air tight or well insulated, she’ll have subtle drafts. Which also means she’ll fill up fast and sink like a rock if she goes into water (2 TONS – see #3 above).

I hope this is helpful to SPN fic writers. I certainly feel better for writing it - this was fun! :)

*Updated - *brackets* for shoulder seat belts were standard - the belts themselves were an option.

[howdoyoudothedew]

Long post of SPN story ideas, anyone can use these

Sabriel plus Jess. Sam wasn't one for polyamourus relationships. He was fine with others who were in one, it just wasn't his thing. Then Jess and him meet Gabriel. - He already know Jess is okay with that kinda thing, she's been in two before - She's the one that approaches him, because she knows that he likes him and frankly, she's kinda falling for the short trickster too. 1- Gabriel comes back, and Sam is pissed. He's all fire and fury, ready to haul back and punch the archangel right in the face. He walks with a purpose. A purpose he doesn't fully know, but his body seems to. The rage flowing hot through his blood seems to know what to do. Then he's standing in front of Gabriel. And Gabriel is simply stating up at him, prepared to take anything. Willing to take every hit. And Sam can feel all that anger at Gabriel sacrificing himself for him bleed out of his body. Suddenly he's clutching at Gabriel's shirt and crying into his shoulder, all puffy eyes and snotty nose. "Again. Why? I'm not worth it." "You're worth a thousand deaths." Gabriel just wraps his arms around his shoulders, holds him close, and let's him cry for as long as he needs. 2- Rumpleskultsen sabriel au 3- Sam and Gabriel do meet in Tall Tales and get to know each other... Biblically. Gabriel has a kid before Mystery Spot, where he tries to teach Sam a lesson because he can't loose the idiot. And somehow, during the confrontation, it comes out. 5- Gabe and Balt doing the trombone drive by 6- Gabe and Luce doing the Fuck You Baltimore thing 7- Leaked footage of Gabriel in the Empty: The clip of Mushu trying to wake all the ancestors 8- Jack Winchester secretly adopts a kitten 9- Jess is a hunter, assigned by angels to keep Sam and Dean, vessels of the apocalypse, safe. Her little sister has been tasked with keeping Dean safe while she has Sam. One night her sister breaks into their apartment to tell her that Dean has gone missing. Maybe also include the demon thing I wanted to do with Velvet for Jess? And that's the true reason the demon went with Brady? 10- Loki and Gabriel switch places. 11- "I was your favourite older brother in heaven." "I don't remember that." "What do you mean you don't??" "What I remember is having to ask Lucifer(or Raphael) to --- "So you do remember!" "Not at all." "You petty little fledgling." "I am not a fledgling anymore, Gabriel." "You're acting like one." "That's rich coming from you." 12- What if they unbound Death from Lucifer? Wouldn't he of killed the archangel? 13- Hunter!Jess, Jess/Charlie 14- Castiel runs from the chapel in an arranged marriage, and Dean packs a duffle bag and follows him. 15- Team Free Will walking in on Ro and Gabe Sam, internally: Am I jealous?? Gabe, internally: Is he jealous?? 16- Sabriel where they meet at comicon where Gabe is dressed as pool and Sam as Spidey. People ask for shippy pictures of them together. 17- Established relationship Destiel gangster AU, Cas goes missing 18- A girl hits on Sam and Gabe gets jealous, established relationship, definitely contains angst 19- Sabriel based on the song Photograph, possibly even as a coda for Exodus episode 20- "Sorry I'm late, I was doing stuff." Gabriel sauntered in a few seconds after that, hair ruffled to a mess that looked like he just ran a hand through it to -barely- get it back under control. The top two buttons on his shirt were buttoned into the holes right under the top two holes, the rest of the buttons following suit. His cheeks were flushed, lips red and puffy, and a few dark purple spots graced the bottom of his neck. "I'm stuff," he breathed the words, a self-satisfied smirk on his face. Sam reddened, his skin now the colour of his flannel, and stumbled over words that wouldn't come out. Though a squeak did manage to escape when Gabe smacked him lightly on the ass. 21- It's called 'Promise Me' The summary says: Gabriel really wished Sam wouldn't make him promise something he wouldn't be able to keep. Gabe comes back, Sam does his thing. "Don't ever die on me again." "I promise." Gabriel faces down death. "I'm sorry." "No!" And Sam dies instead. 22- Fic called either 'I need more dreams and less reality' or Give me more dreams, less reality' for angsty Sabriel with dead Gabriel and may or may not contain happy ending where he comes back I just don't know Happy Sabriel with hints of it not being true only for it to be a dream in the end because I'm an ass 24- I have found the one whom my soul loves. SoS 1:4- Destiel 25- Sam flirting + being embarrassed by Dean Season one, Sarah Blake Season one, Tall Talls 26- Dean is born without a soulmark, but when he comes back from the dead the handprint makes a fairly compelling one. 27- All I want is a fanfiction about when Cas is possessed by Lucifer, and for some reason Luci kisses Dean. And it's their (Destiel's) first kiss. The whole time Cas is inside pleading and begging him not to. Dean kisses back. 28- The after math of Litra's Sacrifice. Written solely because I was curious about how it could affect the rest of the story. As the day went on, Sam felt some of the soreness return. It was a pretty minuscule amount, but it made him smile. It helped cement in his brain the fact that last night, all of it, had been completely and utterly real. He wasn't sure why that made him happy. ---- Later when Cas comes back, he has to pause. Something is different about Sam and it doesn't take him long to figure out what. He has a claim on him, one different from the claim of Lucifer's vessel, something stronger and pagan, yet not quite fully pagan. Somehow Sam is lucky enough for Cas to show the tact to not ask abut it in front of Dean. -Changing Channels- Sam felt Loki's presence as soon as they left the car. It made him pause, though it wasn't fully of worry for what would come next. He felt a wave of calm pass over him. (Which confused him, but he didn't tell Dean.) Something in him told him not to tell Dean. He's not sure why he listened to it. -Hotel- "Little brother, laying claim to my vessel? How ambitious of you," Lucifer sneered. "And how very, very stupid." "Oh." Lucifer turned on Dean, "And you've been claimed by Castiel." He returned his gaze to Gabriel, though it was only from the corner of his eye. The confusion radiating from the elder Winchester was much too fun a thing to watch for him to remove his full attention from him. "You and Cas sure had fun while me and Mickey've been gone." 29- Gabe keeps calling Sam more and more ridiculous nicknames, so Sam calls Gabe shortcake (or short stack) - This should be a fanfiction. Called 'Nicknames'. 30- Sabriel and Destiel hanahaki disease- it takes angels a longer time to truly develop it, as their body is constantly healing itself. But when Cas first becomes human, it truly manifests. 31- Soulmate AU colours where Sam knows that Gabe is still alive because he never loses his colours. They fade slightly, but they never go away. Something in him tells him not to tell Dean, not to tell anybody, for the safety of all those involved. - The first time, when the Trickster dies, and Sam still sees colour, he dismisses it. Maybe it's a fluke or something. 32- Don't you go quietly into that good night, Castiel. You fly and you fight that good night, Castiel. Because us on earth need you from that good night, Castiel. 33- Impala, hand on Dean's chest: you rebuilt me. I just about fell apart multiple times, and each time you remade me. (Possible Dean as a parallel to Cas with the Impala being a parallel to Dean) Later: Does that sound familiar? 34- Chuck creates a flower: Amara, Amara! Look, I made this for you! *Chuck hands it to her, and when Amara touches it the flower turns to ash in her hands* Chuck creates ----: Amara, Amara! Look, I made this for you! *It turns to ash in Amara's hands* Chuck creates ----: Amara, look! I made this for you! *It turns to ash in Amara's hands* Chuck creates life: Amara, look. I made this for you. *It turns to ash in Amara's hands* Chuck creates Amara's prison: Amara, I made this for you. -im sorry 35- Sam: Why do you keep stealing my flannel? Gabe: Why'd you steal my jacket? (They keep on asking these questions until one of them says: Well why'd you steal my heart? Pre-slash, getting together, mutual pining?, crack) 36- Sam's Many Hookups Gabe meets up with Sam as different women

[katsidhe]

Ranking Every SPN Midseason Premiere

15) 10.10 The Hunter Games. Wow, this one is real bad. Has not one, not two, but three subplots I either don’t care about or actively despise: Claire bonding with Cas (uh, he’s wearing her dad’s corpse), Rowena’s petty infighting with Crowley (bleh why), and Metatron smugly egging on Dean’s violence (why would he care?). This is deep in the slog of s10 episodes that go nowhere fast.

14) 13.10 Wayward Sisters. Is it clear yet that I really don’t like Claire episodes? Sam and Dean roasting lizards is the only real moment of fun here. I liked Kaia, so I hated that she gets used as Claire’s insta-friend/retconned love interest in order to immediately fridge her for the backdoor pilot… so that Claire, who was orphaned young, can understand loss, I guess? Pointless and unimaginative. I also resent the deeply, deeply directionless magic spear/Alt!Kaia subplot that eats up, like, four other episodes in s14-15 and accomplishes exactly nothing.

13) 3.09 Malleus Maleficarum. I like this episode for the insight we get into Ruby’s backstory, and the frank conversation that she and Dean have about demons and his impending Hell tour. But other than that, there isn’t too much to recommend it.

12) 8.10 Torn and Frayed. The next several episodes are all good, and are difficult to sort. In 8.10, Sam and Dean choose each other over Amelia and Benny, in all-or-none ultimatums. I truly enjoy how miserable they both seem to find themselves about this, about how their relationship has grown more and more isolating when tbh it needn’t be. Naomi’s control of Cas in this episode fleshes out the chilling implications we got in The Rapture: Heaven is best when its dark AF.

11) 6.12 Like A Virgin. Monsters, dragons, and Eve: the reveal of Purgatory kicks off a brand new chapter of the show’s mythology. But more importantly, Sam is fully back now! Watching him navigate this brave new world while no one will tell him anything is fascinating and more than a little sad.

10) 4.11 Family Remains. Actually frightening! I like it when the show does the ~it was just humans~ twist. And this episode has great commentary on Dean’s emotional state after his reveal about Hell last time. It’s a good MOTW.

9) 15.10 Nihilism. Dean’s bar mindscape. It’s no Sam mindscape, but it’s definitely the most interesting thing that’s been done with Dean and possession. It’s kinda fascinating that Dean’s uncomplicated happy place exists in an underdog Americana limbo without either Cas or Sam. Also gives us, at last, a good take on Alt!Michael’s motivations—he’s hunting down God. Loses points because the idea of managing to lock Michael in Dean’s mind for any length of time is still extremely unlikely.

8) 1.11 Scarecrow. Meg’s iconic introduction, Dean and Sam’s first breakup; emotional clashing over Winchester family dynamics: what’s not to love?

7) 12.09 First Blood. We’ve got Sam and Dean coping with prison very differently, then using their deaths to escape, and an action sequence through the woods: it’s just real fun. Cas breaks their deal with Billie, which ends up having, uh, no consequences whatsoever. It’s a strong kickoff to a regrettably weak second half of s12.

6) 7.11 Adventures in Babysitting. A quiet, emotional breath after Bobby’s death: Sam and Dean are deep, deep in terrible misery. The potent psychological suffering of season 7 is a delight, and 7.11 doesn’t shy away from it. Plus, it’s got Sam volunteering to get bit in the neck, and a rare example of a Plucky Teen (tm) done right.

5) 15.09 The Trap. This is just a worse 11.10. But 11.10 is amazing, so that’s still a compliment: Chuck tries both torture and the promise of various bleak futures to get Sam to cave. Even if the various futures aren’t staged that well, there is so much stuff here that’s ripe for analysis: especially on the broader stage of s15, this episode is plain interesting.

4) 5.11 Sam, Interrupted. Sam and Dean in a psych ward! They’re dealing with the extreme stress and grief of season 5, and they’re doing it badly—this episode provides a great way for their respective coping mechanisms to be forcefully stripped away. In a delightful microcosm of the show, Sam confesses his anger and gets consequently wrestled down and tied down to a cot.

3) 2.10 Hunted. Gordon Walker, whose old-fashioned absolutism is only matched by his competence, is one of the most memorable early seasons antagonists, and for good reason. We also get Ava, the queen of season 2, who has taken it upon herself to warn Sam and save his life. Then Sam and Dean using code words to disarm Gordon’s trap, and the fallout from John’s final words: quality television.

2) 9.10 Road Trip. Oh my god, what a horror show. This is an exemplary episode. Just incredible. Kinda unfair that it has to compete with 11.10, because it would take the gold by a mile in most other matchups. It’s got a fascinating character study of Gadreel, which also serves to inject interest into the s9 angel conflict; it’s the violent, hypocritical lengths to which Dean is willing to go; it’s got needles in Sam’s brain and a nauseating, horrific picture of possession; it’s got That Bridge Scene. The payoff for 9.01 begins to come due, in spades.

1) 11.10 Devil in the Details. Season 11 gets two D-tier ranks and two S-tier ranks; this is the duality of man. Do I even have to explain why I love 11.10 so much? It’s Sam and Lucifer in a room in Hell for an entire episode, nuff said. It gets better with every rewatch—there are so many great tiny moments, so much history. Lucifer’s combination salespitch/dressing-down is threatening and fascinating and mostly accurate; Sam’s rigid terror and courage and heartbreak and anger and resignation and determination are intoxicating. I want to watch them talk in a room forever.

[katsidhe]

7.15 Thoughts

Every time I watch 7.15, I find myself appreciating it more. 7.15 is likely my very favorite non-headliner SPN episode: it’s got great outside POV, legitimately disturbing imagery, a well-executed plot twist, and, oh yeah, Hallucifer. (Oh my god I love season 7.)

First of all, I can’t think of an episode that does a better job of interrogating the way that Sam and Dean knowingly and willingly cause severe collateral damage--especially collateral damage that’s habitual, to nameless characters, in a manner so routine that it’s offscreen. Despite knowing what Jeffrey turns out to be, I ache for him, because the story he tells—of knowing the Winchesters shattered him, and yet knowing that he owed them his life—is still undeniably true for so many other, unnamed characters.  “And we’re the good guys,” Dean says.

Sam points out that if the demon truly has returned, then their business here is unfinished. However, Jeffrey’s fate, despite their treatment of him, does not count as their responsibility; checking up on him isn’t even their idea—it’s Nora’s suggestion. 

Sam and Dean do not ask for Jeffrey’s consent to be tortured. Instead, they inform him what they’re going to do, and why, and they luck out that he doesn’t beg them to stop. No actual choice involved—they know it, and Jeffrey knows it. Dean is straightforward and grim. Sam is quiet, non-confrontational, and compassionate... but above all pragmatic.

Despite Jeffrey’s clearly fanatical love for his demon and professed innate violent fantasies, this time I found myself wondering more about what he was truly like pre-possession. His demon tells him, “We don't do ‘no.’ Remember, Jeffrey?”, a line which surely doesn’t imply that Jeffrey was always so willing. (Post-s14, he reminds me of Nick, another vessel whose catalyst for violence was his inability to cope with the ruins of his life and his psyche post-possession, but who clearly didn’t start out a serial killer.)

Sam, like Nick, like Jeffrey, knows about what it’s like to try to deal with separating the pieces of himself from the being that possessed him. It’s so telling that the chosen foil in an episode where Sam loses important ground in this struggle is “a guy who went insane and became a serial killer post-possession.” Heh. And like Nick and Jeffrey, the theme in 7.15 is Sam “wanting” his possessor back--that is, finding himself unable to ignore and repress the way that that trauma has changed him. Jeffrey and Sam are both, in a sense, continuing the work their possessor started—Jeffrey with the literal to-do list of murders, and Sam simply by tormenting himself. 

This episode (and s7 in general) has a lot of discussion of mental illness, a lot of which comes from Dean in particular categorizing people as “balls to the wall crazy” and “not”. Sam, for his part, also can’t seem to keep himself from lumping himself in with Jeffrey as just another “psychopath” pretending he’s not a danger to himself and others. And yet. Despite the fact that Jeffrey is in fact a sociopathic murderer, his time in group therapy and indeed his struggle in general are not played for laughs. Support and therapeutic intervention were a good thing for Jeffrey (and hey, Sam’s help in s14 saved Nick’s life, ahahaha), which is a delightful tragic irony. 

Okay, let’s finally talk about the hallucinations!! (Goddddd I love s7, have I mentioned that?). 

We get to see the type of thing Sam’s been dealing with all season, for months. Sam’s hallucinations are sometimes petty, annoying, and relatively innocuous despite their intrusiveness—and then abruptly they’re extremely disturbing and violent, to the point where Sam can barely control his reactions. And then Sam has to reel himself back in and tell himself nothing is amiss. It’s a constant struggle. It’s horrifying and exhausting just to watch. 

Everything Hallucifer says? Sam’s thoughts, Sam’s subconscious. Sam’s unkind impulses, Sam’s memories, Sam’s pattern matching, Sam’s ruthlessness, Sam’s exasperation, Sam’s dark humor, Sam’s mechanisms for distancing and compartmentalizing, Sam’s flashbacks of, and knowledge of his capacity for, violence. It’s Sam remembering Sutton’s name. It’s Sam making wordplay jokes about rape. It’s Sam’s intrusive urge to hit Nora and threaten to torture her. It’s a lot of things that Sam’s put under one umbrella--and some of the uglier things are maybe a bit more palatable for Sam to deal with coming from the mouth of the worst evil he knows. 

The mental leaps Hallucifer’s making for Sam are... nooot really leaps, honestly. They’re connections Sam should be able to make without much thought; they’re patterns he’s in a habit of noticing. I love what this says about how enmeshed Sam’s trauma is in how he functions at a basic level, how he needs to interrogate this part of his brain in order to access so much knowledge and skill. 

Sam is, in effect, holding his own thoughts ransom from himself. It’s a terrifying illustration of how Sam is, at this point, fundamentally unable to function as Sam without the cooperation of this horribly damaged and destructive part of himself. 

Okay, but how casual his conversation with Hallucifer is, when Sam finally lets it happen! How it’s nothing, how it’s so habitual and ordinary. How Sam’s fear is just as casual and omnipresent as anything else, but he can function through it because he has to, what else is he gonna do. 

And of course, the ending—the collapse. Sam’s hallucination has been egging him on to engage and “let me in,” a suggestive and long familiar theme of coerced consent. Eventually Sam does, because it is no longer sustainable or possible to ignore this piece of himself any longer. And his brain will make him suffer for it, but—true to form for both Lucifer and Sam—Hallucifer is careful to emphasize that this was Sam’s choice, Sam’s fault, Sam who made the bed that he will burn in.