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goodgirlofglory · 3 years

Text

That which lingered on his mind /Chapter 6

Chapter 5 - Epilogue

Pairing: Dark!Steve Rogers x reader(series), Steve Rogers x reader

Word count: 4,1k

Warnings: 18+, non-con(series), dub-con(series), Explicit sexual content, Explicit language, smut, oral (f/m receiving), angst, fluff

Chapter summary: You and Steve reunite after three months of silence to find each longing just as much for the other. Much needed closure takes place, and you find comfort in each other’s arms...

Author’s note: This chapter is just a huge ball of fluff (and some smut). I can’t seem to let go of the feeling that Steve and Y/N belong together, and neither can they lol. There will be one more part to this series, and possibly an epilogue. Thank you so much to those who have followed the series, and to those of you who are new. I love you guys for all the love and feedback you give, it makes my heart melt<3 The end of this chapter is consciously and heavily inspired by this fic by @wkemeup. Both this and the first part is an absolutely amazing and exhilarating read which I continuously return to, so I heartily recommend you go check it out! Your media consumption is your own responsibility, but I advise you to not engage if any of the content in the warnings are troubling to you. My work is not beta-read, so all mistakes are my own. My work is not the be distributed outside this blog. Reblogs, likes and replies are very welcome!! Hope you enjoy<33

You had stared so much at the slip of paper on the fridge, you’d practically memorized the digits by now.

Three months had gone by since you left the Avengers compound, the steady rhythm of your day-to-day making it seem almost like a dream by now.

A moving truck had come and packed Steve’s apartment up and out during the first week, and you’d been embarrassed by the way you’d spied on them through the peephole in your door.

Fury and Natasha had swore on S.H.I.E.L.D’s behalf to not contact you further unless there was any sign of danger, and there had been complete radio silence on their part since then.

You now had no idea where Steve Rogers was in the world, or how he was. You actually missed him...like a lot.

You stood in your kitchen, mindlessly flipping through a magazine on a wednesday afternoon when your eyes kept returning to the slip of paper on the fridge. You’d considered contacting him before. Every day for the last three months, in fact. But you’d always shook the thought from your head. Surely it wouldn’t be good for him to open up those wounds again..

No, you should let him move on...even if you couldn’t.

But that night the thought was completely unshakeable, restless adrenaline fueling your body as the slip of paper called out to you.

With a huff, you closed the magazine, stalked up to the fridge and ripped the paper off.

Just burn it, get rid of it, make it impossible to contact him so that you have no choice but to move on.

That was the rational thought, the one you should’ve headed.

But instead, you found yourself flinging your phone out and with shaky fingers tapping the digits into it before pressing the green phone icon with a decisive thumb.

Your elevated heartbeat thumped through your body as you held the phone to your ear, actually sweating.

Two buzzing tones droned on by, each filling you with instant regret, before the third was abruptly cut off.

“Rogers speaking.”

Your breath caught in your throat. There he was.

“Hello? Who is this?” he pressed.

“Eh..hi Steve,” you stuttered out awkwardly.

You held your breath as the silence from the other end droned on.

“Y/N?”

“Yeah, um...hi,”

“Hi,” he answered, sounding incredulous.

“Hi,” you said, distracted by his voice, even as distorted as it was through the phone.

A moment passed with complete silence before you snapped back to yourself.

“Um, I...Natasha gave me your number, if you’re wondering,” you blurted out.

“Y-yeah, I suppose I should be wondering about that,” he answered, “H-How are you? Is everything alright?”

“Yeah, yeah, everythings fine,” you rushed out. For a moment, a panicked voice in the back of your head yelled how dumb you looked. Steve clearly thought you were calling because of some trouble with S.H.I.E.L.D or Hydra. It’d been three months, he was probably not thinking about you anymore.

“I’ve been thinking about you,” you heard him say from the other end of the line.

“I mean, I’ve been hoping you were okay, you know, doing well,” he quickly corrected himself.

“I’ve been thinking about you too,” you whispered.

“Sorry, what was that? This phone is kinda old...I think, so it’s difficult to hear you.”

“Yeah, uh, Steve...I was wondering if you’d..maybe, possibly, if you have time...like to talk. With me. Face to face, that is,” you stammered out in such a way, embarrassment burned on your cheeks by the time you were done.

“I’d really like that,” he answered, and you thought you might hear a smile in his tone.

“Great,” you breathed, relief washing over you, excitement setting in its wake.

You were sweating bullets as you looked out over the lake in Central Park, the spring sun warm on your skin as you waited.

You were thirty minutes early, not being able to sit still back at home.

You noticed him the moment he appeared over Cherry Hill, your breath picking up as he got nearer.

He was dressed in a pale blue button up and the brown leather jacket you knew so well from the hallway. He was clean shaven and his hair was cut short. He looked like the Steve who’d lived next door to you for so many years.

He stopped a few feet away.

You looked at each other in silence, and there was this sweet ache spreading throughout your heart as you looked into his shining, blue eyes.

“Thank you for meeting me,” he said sincerely after a moment.

“Yeah, well I was the one who called you,” you said sheepishly.

“True...Natasha, huh?” he said, and now there was amusement in his voice.

“Natasha,” you repeated.

God, you wanted to reach out and touch him, you’re body buzzing with energy from having him this close. It was magnetic.

“Do you wanna walk?” you said instead, hoping you were masking your shivering form well enough.

“Sure thing,” he said, and you fell into step along the lake, missing the way his eyes lingered on you.

You talked about small stuff for a while, falling into such a comfortable pace you were soon giggling and joking, watching intently as Steve threw his head back in a hearty laugh at one point.

It all just felt so right, so tranquil as the sun set on the park, the time having flown by.

“Oh damn,” you said, looking down at your watch, “I’ve gotta go.”

“Can I walk you home? For once I could say knowing where my date lived wouldn’t be creepy,” Steve answered, his cheeks turning a bright flush of pink when he understood what he’d said.

You averted your eyes, way too exhilarated by his words to keep eye contact.

“I didn’t mean...That just slipped out, I know that’s not why you asked me to meet you,” he continued, awkwardly scratching his neck, the air between you suddenly thick.

“Honestly, I don’t know why I called you,” you said, stopping dead in your tracks and looking at him. The park was nearly empty around you, varm street lights blinking to life.

This is it, you thought as he looked into your eyes with mild confusion, blue eyes intense.

“I just knew that I couldn’t stop thinking about you,” you admitted nervously while looking down at your shoes. You could feel the words slipping out of you, but you couldn’t stop the ramble coming on. “It’s like I can’t handle myself. I probably shouldn’t be this drawn to you, considering the things that happened, but I am. For I don’t see those things anymore. All I see is you...and you’re…”

You trailed off as your eyes met his, his face contorted in an expression you couldn’t quite decipher.

He stepped closer to you, and you swallowed hard, your throat dry all of a sudden. Your body surged with the need to touch him.

He stood mere inches away from you now, looking down at you with such intensity, you shivered.

“I can’t stop thinking about you, either,” he whispered. His hand came up to cup your cheek, but he stopped himself a few centimeters away, hesitating.

Reaching your limit, you leaned into his touch. The warmth of his hand felt like a balm on your skin, making you sigh in instant content.

“I need you to tell me this is alright,” he said, and you heard the tremor in his voice, the way his breath was uneven, his body rigid.

“This is alright,” you whispered.

“I need you to say stop the moment I overstep,” he said, urgency in his tone.

“You won’t,” you answered.

“Just tell me you’ll say stop,” he interrupted, almost desperate as his grip on your cheek became more strained.

You understood consent was just as important to him in that moment, if not more.

“I will,” you said with a nod.

He let out a small sigh of relief, his eyelashes fluttering for a tiny second.

“Can I kiss you?” he asked then, and you thought your heart would fly out of your chest.

“Yes,” you whispered desperately.

He surged forward, but pressed his lips to yours softly, tentatively, sweet and gentle.

Your body seemed to implode, sparks jolting through every nerve.

His hand reached back to hold your neck, the other arms wrapping around your waist to press your body firmly to his. Your hands wringed the leather of his jacket as they went around to cling to his back. You stood flush against each other, and still you needed him closer.

The kiss grew more hungry and Steve seemed almost starved as his mouth devoured yours. You broke the kiss once you both were out of breath, and Steve leaned his forehead to yours.

“Walk me back to mine?” you asked hopefully.

He nodded enthusiastically, before drawing you in for another searing kiss.

Back at your apartment, he hesitated slightly at your doorstep, and you remembered suddenly that he had never been inside except when under Hydra’s control.

You squeezed his hand and he followed you inside.

You removed your coat while he took off his jacket, and though there had been a tense moment, you soon found yourself kissing him slow and tenderly as you stood in your living room.

His thumb stroked your jaw softly when you broke the kiss, still in each other's arms.

“Do you remember that time I lent you a penny, down in the laundry room?” he asked, eyes trailed to where his thumb was caressing your face.

You couldn’t help a tiny laughter.

“Yeah, when you’d been so lucky as to hear me imitate a dying trumpet before you came in, I believe,” you answered.

Now it was his time to laugh, and it felt so unbelievably good to feel it vibrate from his chest and through your body.

“A rather cute, dying trumpet, I remember thinking,” he added. You barked out a giggle.

He was swaying you softly now, dancing to music only the two of you could hear.

“Did you know that’s one of my favorite songs?” he asked then, sounding genuinely curious.

You waited a bit before answering, contemplating how honest you should be.

“Where do you think I knew it from? You only blasted it through the walls about a hundred times a week,” you teased, earning a tickle from his hand at your waist.

You squirmed in his arms, and you both laughed heartily.

Then his expression grew more sincere, and you almost lost your breath as his deep, blue eyes looked into yours with such raw and honest emotion.

“I used to think about someone very special when listening to that song -” he admitted, and you felt a small tug of jealousy in your chest “- but ever since that very...memorable performance - “ now it was your turn to tickle him, both of you giggling as he squirmed slightly. He grew serious again, holding you tightly to him - “whenever I heard that song, all I could think about was you.”

“Is that why I never heard you playing it again?” you teased, not being able to help yourself.

He gave an exaggerated sigh, and you loved how flustered he became.

“I think I played it more often after that, actually,” he said before bending down slowly to kiss the corner of your mouth.

A lump was forming in your throat, his words unleashing joy you hadn’t felt in such a long time.

“If it wasn’t for you, I wouldn’t be out of Hydra’s control,” he said, the gravity of his words enforced by the intense look of gratitude in his eyes.

“I’m sure they would have saved you somehow, Steve,” you said.

“Yeah, maybe. But there’s no denying how special you are,” he answered, his voice barely above a whisper. “Especially to me,” he added after a moment.

You’d stopped swaying, now staring into each other’s eyes as the silence engulfed you. You could hear your blood pumping in your ears.

“And I don’t even, really know you,” he said, astonishment in his tone.

You know parts of me really well, you thought to yourself. You didn’t say it out loud though. One day you would probably be able to laugh at all this, but not now. Now you needed time to heal.

“We have time for that now,” you answered him reassuringly, your hand coming up to stroke lovingly about his cheek.

He leaned into your touch with a hum.

“As long as you’ll have me,” he murmured, eyes on yours as he kissed the inside of your palm.

You pulled him in for a kiss as your answer, the meeting of your lips so tender and affectionate, it said a thousand words.

You soon pulled him into your bedroom, a trail of clothes left behind as you slowly and carefully explored each other with your hands and mouths, falling onto the bed with a giggle.

His body was the same, glorious, but there was a gentleness to him now that you had scarcely seen before, a new Steve you relished.

He undressed you slowly, worshipping every new patch of skin that revealed itself with his lips and tongue, and you were heaving for breath shortly enough, arousal burning hot in the pit of your stomach.

He let you wrap your hands around his rock hard length when you were both naked. It felt so exhilarating to have him back in your grasp. You started to slowly drag your hand up and down, eliciting quiet grunts from him.

He pushed you gently down on your back and dragged you to the edge of the bed. He positioned himself on his knees on the floor and gave you an inquiring look, silently asking for permission.

You nodded, biting your lip as your fingers glided through his hair, desperate for his mouth.

After that he ascended on your pussy, devouring you with renewed passion, like he was savouring every detail.

You threw your head back against the mattress, your moans urging him on.

His fingers entered you slowly, the glide made smooth by your slick.

“God, you’re soaked,” he panted against your mound, breath tickling your clit.

“It’s all for you,” you moaned out, eyes falling shut as he curled his fingers against that sweet, spongy spot inside you, so soft, so gentle. His tongue returned to your clit with a groan. He worked you over the edge with deft expertise, and groaned long and hard when your thighs squeezed around his head as you came, seeing stars.

He gave your thighs an affectionate squeeze before crawling over you.

You eagerly welcomed his tongue as it swept into your mouth, your own, tangy taste catching on your tastebuds.

He let you roll him over so you were straddling him before you started to explore his body with hands and mouth. You had waited so long to finally be able to worship him, dipping your tongue along every dip and pan of smooth skin and rippling muscles as you slowly crept down.

His cock jumped when your lips ghosted over the leaking, purple head, bobbing against his stomach. You were about to take him into your mouth when his hands lifted your face up to look at him.

“You don’t have to,” he started, but you saw how blown his eyes were, how his eyebrows were knitted in anticipation.

You playfully swatted his hands away before smiling.

“I want to,” you said, and he nodded eagerly, watching intently as you took him in your hand before enclosing the bulbous head into your hot and wet mouth, holding his gaze as you sucked.

His whole body jolted with an almost startled moan.

God, he sounded so good

The tingling in your lower abdomen grew anew as you steadily worked him into your mouth, your tongue swiping along the veins of the underside before lapping at the salty precum adorning the head.

His fists clenched the sheets on either side of his body as you bobbed your head faster and faster, his groans growing louder as he lost himself in the pleasure. He could have finished right then and there and you wouldn’t have minded one bit. You felt privileged to witness such a magnificent sight.

He stopped you by gripping your hair and tugging it lightly, your mouth leaving his cock with a wet pop.

“Holy Jesus, Y/N, I’m going to come if you keep doing that,” he panted in a husky breath, sounding completely fucked out as you crawled up his body, kissing his clavicle as you straddled his hips. You hummed in response as you kissed him. His hands held your face in a tight grip as his mouth devoured yours, possessive and intense in his passion. You melted against his chest, submitting entirely to him in your blizz.

He broke the kiss to pant in your mouth. “I wanna be inside you so bad.”

You moaned at his words, having dreamt about them for so long.

Reaching between your bodies, you gripped his cock and lined it with your entrance, a thrill surging through you when the head entered you.

Gazing into his eyes, hooded and dark, you slowly sank down on him, feeling him throb inside you inch by inch. He grunted as he bottomed out, the sound loud and obscene as it sent vibrations through you. He didn’t seem to know what to do, panting hard, swearing under his breath as you shifted.

You gave him a quick kiss, dragging his bottom lip between your teeth as you sat up.

“I got you,” you whispered as you started rocking back and forth, deep drags of his cock inside you flooding your system with sparks of pleasure.

He seemed to get his wits about him soon enough. His hands found your hips, helping you move faster, his gaze locking on your face with a focused look. His eyes, strong and intent, sent hot shivers all the way down to your toes and you bucked your hips harder, earning grumbling moans from him.

You could feel the coil deep in your lower belly tightening, your hips faltering in their rhythm as pleasure clouded your mind. Steve took it as a cue and started thrusting up into you, hitting that spot within you dead on.

You yelped and he halted.

“Are you okay?” he asked through his pants.

He was so sweet it was almost infuriating

You bent forward and caught his lips in a fierce kiss.

“Yeah. Please, Steve, don’t stop,” you almost whimpered against his lips, hands tugging on his hair as desperation grew.

He moaned sweetly into your mouth and started thrusting again, harder and faster. You whined as the coil tightened further, bringing you back to the edge.

He groaned your name into your mouth before moving his head into the crook of your neck. Your stomach flipped as you recognised the move, your head swimming with memories. You clenched around his cock.

His arms locked around you as he pounded into you with abandon now, his mouth attached to the juncture between your neck and shoulder.

Your hands were clinging onto his hair for dear life, loving the way he moved within you, the way he clung to you as he fucked into you, massive arms locked around your torso.

Your orgasm hit you like a tidal wave, seizing you as the coil in your stomach snapped. Steve held you so tight the breath left your lungs as he kept fucking into you, prolonging your climax to the point where you could only gasp at the overstimulation.

His mouth found yours, and you whined into his mouth as he kept up his pace.

His eyes were deep pools of pleasure and affection, shining with complete lust. His cheeks were flushed, his eyebrows knitted and his plump lips slightly parted and shining with saliva. He was breathtaking.

“Steve,” you moaned lowly into his mouth and then his hips faltered, stuttering as his body went rigid beneath you, spilling inside you.

You held him through his orgasm, kissing his open mouth as he gasped for air.

He held you close to him as he came down from his high, stroking your cheekbone with his thumb as he regained his breath. He was so fucking gorgeous you couldn’t believe it.

You rolled over to the side, Steve’s cock slipping from inside you.

You lay tucked into his embrace, fingers running through the light patch of hair on his chest as you hummed with content. Steve’s eyes moved slowly over your face.

“I keep thinking I went about this all wrong,” he muttered. You stiffened, a small sting of panic in your chest. He registered your reaction and quickly brought your chin up with a hand. “I mean in the order we did...this.”

You softened a bit, but still didn’t quite catch his meaning.

“First of all, I should have been the one asking you out. And it should have been a real date,” he said, and you finally understood what he was saying.

“Yeah? What would that have been?” you asked, curious now. He was such an old sap.

“Firstly, I would bring flowers and pick you up at your door,” he said, the hand under his chin coming up to stroke your cheek softly with the knuckles.

“Then, I would take you to the most romantic restaurant in town, You know, one with candlelight -”

His fingers stroked down your neck, tickling wonderfully over your skin.

“- a live band maybe-”

His fingers kept their exploration down your arm, leaving goosebumps in their wake. You could barely keep your breath in check as his eyes burned lovingly into yours.

“-and a view that could only be surpassed by you, sipping on a glass of wine across the table, looking more beautiful than lady liberty herself,” he finished, entwining his fingers with yours.

You were embarrassingly hot and out of breath.

“And then what?” you panted softly.

“Then, I’d walk you home in the moonlight, and if the night was successful, and you looked at me with those eyes as we reached your door,” he said, pointing a look at you, making you blush harder, “then I’d kiss your hand, like a gentleman, and ask when I could see you next,” he said, bringing your hand up to lay a light kiss to it.

You almost swooned at that.

Maybe being an old sap wasn’t so bad.

“Well, we did walk home while it was dark,” you tried, earning a chuckle from the blond.

“I keep thinking it’s kind of a shame you moved out of the building,” you continued, releasing his hand before booping his nose with your finger.

He groaned and ran a hand over his face. “Yeah, you’re right.”

“Where did you move, by the way?” you asked.

“I finally got a place in Brooklyn, actually,” he said with enthusiasm. “I remember getting beat up in the alley behind the building, so it’s familiar.” He paused as he looked at you. “Don’t know if it feels like home, though,” he said, his eyes studying your face in a way that had you burning under his gaze.

“Maybe I could visit,” you said, trying to distract him from noticing how much his words affected you.

“Yeah, I could make you boiled potatoes with boiled ham, per the only recipes I can remember from back in the day,” he said playfully, and you laughed way too hard at that.

“As long as I can be near you,” you said fondly, tracing his clavicle with a finger.

“It’s too bad you can’t call me neighbor anymore,” he mused.

You bit the inside of your cheek.

“But I’ll always be your penny-wash-girl,” you said, smirking as his brows knitted in confused recognition at the familiar nickname.

“Natasha,” you explained, shrugging.

He snorted, but now he was the one blushing.

“Natasha, huh?” he asked, and you saw how he tried to conceal his amusement. “I suppose I should be a bit displeased by her meddling in my private life, but…”

“But?” you pressed softly.

“But not this time,” he said and smiled at you.

That was it. This was becoming too much of a fairytale ending.

You slapped his chest lightly and sprung from the bed.

“Come on, superboy, let me show you something better than boiled ham,” you called as you strutted out of the room, nude as the day you were born.

“Don't know if you can show me anything better than the view I've got now,” he called after you, and your giggle rang through the hall.

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If you want to be added to the taglist, leave a reply to any of my fics or send me an ask<3

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kacchanrawr · 3 years

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Things I want to see in the future of MHA

(not just post-war stuff, but also the entire series. Some of these are kinda self-indulgent)

1. Endeavor and Hawks’ judgment

I honestly don’t know if I want to see them punished or pardoned. I’m interested in both of those so I’ll just trust Horikoshi on that one. But anyways, there’s no way they aren’t getting shit for this.

2. Whatever the ‘fake heroes’ are gonna do after this

Going back to Stain’s ideology about fake heroes. I agree with parts of it, there are a lot of people that become heroes without the conviction. They get into it by treating it the same way as any other office job, not as a mission to be well, heroes. But I don’t agree that they should be killed or eliminated. Being a hero for money isn’t inherently a bad thing, it’s when you let greed take over you to the point that you forget what it means to be a hero. Some of those ‘fake heroes’ like Mt. Lady who was originally in it for the fame and money have grown to become real heroes. Others who really have zero conviction, will probably quit after facing this amount of despair, like the guy in chapter 296.

3. The Todoroki family’s image

How will everyone else see the victims of the situation, Natsuo, Fuyumi, Rei and Shoto after this? Especially Shoto. Now that his past is out in the public, that will probably affect his future as a pro. Would his classmates and peers see him or treat him differently after this? Like out of pity or sympathy?

4. The public’s backlash in general

How will the public start viewing not just Endeavor, Hawks, and the Todoroki family, but all heroes? Will they lose faith in heroes? We know they kinda already are when UA had a lot of backlash when Bakugo was kidnapped. UA as well, will it get shut down?

5. Bakudeku’s talk

I don’t think their relationship is actually gonna stay the same after this whole ‘my body moved on its own because I care for you and wanted to save you so I just got stabbed and risked my life for you and even told you to stop trying to be so selfless and do everything by yourself’ thing. All Might also did foreshadow that they were gonna talk soon. Maybe we could get the long awaited Bakugo apology scene ? Though it feels way too soon. And if Hori feeds us Bakudekus even more I think we’re just gonna combust.

5. Deku’s character development

His mindset and view of the world will probably be way darker and even more serious after this. I also want to see how Bakugo getting hurt for his sake and saying “don’t play hero all by yourself” will affect him. We know that he has decided to become a hero that wouldn’t make anyone worry about him when he had a flashback of his mom crying and being worried for him. He decided that the solution to that is to be stronger, but now maybe he can learn that selflessness doesn’t necessarily mean that he has to carry all the weight by himself. But then there’s the 4th user’s quirk that will probably push him to be even more selfless.

6. Ochako’s development

Please please PLEASE let this girl have more development. The way her fight against Toga ended, and her seeing the grievous side of being a hero? Probably a set up for her development.

7. Basically the rest of the kids’ development?

Obviously it’s not just the people involved in the fight against Shigaraki, or Ochako that are gonna view the world differently after this. I wanna see how they will deal with this. Kirishima and Mina will probably be some of the highlights. Also Momo, since Midnight meant a lot to her when she was the one that trusted Momo to lead their classes in the battle against Gigantomachia.

8. Aizawa and Present Mic dealing with Midnight’s death

Those two are especially highlighted amongst all of the other UA staff members because they have a past with her, as shown in vigilantes. We saw their anger and sadness about Shirakumo, what more when it comes to Midnight?

9. The villains dealing with their losses

Yes, know Toga went on a rampage after Twice’s death, but how will she and deal with it in the long run? How about losing Mr. Compress? How will Shigaraki react to both of those, and having the other Paranormal Liberation Front members like Geten captured? Not just emotionally, but how about the loss in terms of strength and power?

10. Prison break arc

People have been talking about this for years, maybe ever since we knew All for One was only imprisoned and not killed. We’ll probably see it happen next chapter. Will it cause the public to lose even more faith in the hero system? How will it affect the villains? Will AFO be their boss now, or will they resist him and stay loyal to Shigaraki?

11. All for One vs Shigaraki

Related to the previous point. We know Shigaraki really doesn’t want AFO bossing him around. They’ll probably have a fight. Maybe Deku and Shigaraki vs AFO? Then they’ll go back to fighting each other once the common threat is gone. This doesn’t feel very likely, but it could be a way of interpreting Deku’s “you looked like you needed saving” at the end of chapter 295.

11. Deku’s arms?

I don’t know if I want him to lose them and get prosthetics, or get healed by Eri. It would be great to see him experience a major loss, but ability-wise and emotionally? Not so good for him, though that’s kinda the point. Also he might not be able to use OFA in his arms anymore and I kinda don’t wanna see that. Even if he can, will he be able to use it at 100%? So far, we’ve seen that the level of technology in MHA aren’t enough to withstand 100%

12. Deku mastering One for All

I wanna see him consistently use 100% without injuring himself. I want to see him do more with black whip, float and the fourth user’s quirk. I’m also curious about the other three quirks left.

13. Power buff for everyone else

I kinda don’t wanna see the MC getting so ahead of everyone else, to the point that they leave everyone else in the dust. But I know that it’s been established way earlier on that Deku will surpass everyone in terms of strength. Even now, Bakugo, one of the strongest in Class 1-A could barely catch up with 30% OFA. But from his internal dialogue in chapter 293, I’m guessing he already had a quirk evolution when he saw Deku at the verge of death. I want to see more details on that though.

14. Everyone else’s reaction to Bakugo’s sacrifice

It’s gonna be a big thing for his character and all, but I don’t think this is gonna happen because of well, everything else being a mess. But maybe at least All Might’s?

15. Deku’s father

I don’t want him to be a really big famous, important figure, or someone involved in this whole AFO vs OFA stuff. It will kinda ruin Deku’s character of like, ‘just an ordinary boy that was lucky and so his character arc is to be worthy of that blessing’. If Deku’s father was someone like that, that would mean he was the fated or chosen one in the first place anyways? But what else can Deku’s dad be? I honestly don’t know.

16. All Might’s death

I see so many people complain that he should’ve died in Kamino, but I disagree because saving that big moment for later was actually a good decision. We know he’s gonna die, he has death flags everywhere. But I wonder how exactly he will die, when he will die, and how big of an impact his death will have.

17. The final battle

As in, the last battle of the entire series. Deku vs Shigaraki rematch, Ochako vs Toga, Shoto vs Dabi. And for Bakugo, well...... he doesn’t really have a villain nemesis? (Huh maybe I’ll talk about that some other time) But the best I could think of right now is Bakugo and Deku vs Shigaraki, like in Heroes Rising. If the Heroes Rising ending was the original series ending, maybe Hori was hinting that Bakugo and Deku will be fighting the final boss together?

18. Bakugo and Deku as a hero duo

Related to the previous point. Shipping lenses aside, I think there’s plenty of foreshadowing for that? Even if they wouldn’t officially be hero partners, I’m guessing they’re both gonna be important pillars. “Win to save, save to win”

19. The ending

I want to see how they will fix the broken hero society. I want to see Class 1-A as wonderful heroes. I want satisfying closure for the villains as well. What I don’t want to see is everyone getting married and having kids like Naruto, and those kids being the characters for a sequel series. I’m sorry but as much as I like a lot of the ships, I think that’s probably one of the worst endings possible. But a next generation sequel actually wouldn’t be that bad if the main characters were the established kid characters we already know and love, Eri, Kota, Katsuma and Mahoro. We can see through them how the new hero system/society works, and maybe all the smaller subtle stuff that they still need to patch up. Other than that, I don’t think there’s anything else good about it.

20. Deku becoming the greatest hero

Also very much related to the previous point but I only remembered it afterwards. We know it’s gonna happen, but how? Also notice that while Bakugo always says ‘number one hero’, Deku always just says ‘greatest hero’, which kinda aren’t the same thing. Maybe it’s just cuz I’m a Bakugo stan, but I don’t think it’s a good idea to just let the rival characters be content with number two? Either ‘Bakugo is the number one in ranking while Deku is the greatest hero’, or ‘Deku is the greatest and number one hero but their rivalry hasn’t ended and it’s a push-pull’ thing. Or just kill one of them (cough Bakugo cough) and it’ll be fine.

21. Other people finding out about OFA

I don't think it's going to stay a secret between Deku, Bakugo and All Might anymore. At the very least, the people involved in the fight against Shigaraki, like Shoto, Aizawa and Endeavor should be given an explanation on why Shigaraki was targeting Deku in particular. At worst, it becomes public news and Deku will now have to deal with a much a greater pressure of everyone expecting him to take up All Might's mantle. I'd rather go with the former, but the latter is also interesting I guess. Or if not those, they'd have to come up with a really good excuse.

Anyways that’s all I can think of for now? There’s probably way more at the back of my head. I’ll just edit whenever.

#mha chapter 296 #bnha chapter 296 #mha #my hero academia #bnha #bakudeku #bkdk #deku #bakugou katsuki #midoriya izuku #uraraka ochako #todoroki shouto #todoroki family is screwed #endeavor and hawks #just random ramblings #mha theories #well not really but kinda

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homieswithhades · 3 years

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you're one of the few i follow who talks about bucky and so here i am once again in your inbox because the whole way the MCU has approached bucky is just not it. you know? they wrote themselves in a hole. they don't know how to respond exactly with his popularity as a character and no homo'd his most important relationship so hard they're two dudes chilling in two different timelines because it's not gay. the whole 'made amends' thing is just wrong and terrible. bucky didn't do anything wrong! hydra did. hydra used him and yet the narrative has placed it on his shoulders. i enjoyed tfatws but i think there were quite a few odd character writing choices.

hiya !! lovely 2 see u in my inbox again <33

(two bros chilling in 2 different timelines cos theyre not gay killed me bdw)

oh 100% bucky has been mishandled by marvel, i wanna say since the very end of cacw. catfa bucky was splendid and amazingly written, super in character, like That's My Bucky.

catws bucky was obviously brainwashed but (even tho the russos had their grimy little hands on this one) again, amazingly written and handled esp thanks to seb.

it starts to go a little awry at the end of cacw. it was fine when bucky said "i dont know if im worth all this steve" nd steve replies "what you did all those years, it wasnt you. you didnt have a choice" bc this. THIS was the perfect way to be handling buckys trauma. and steve was the ONLY person who could do that. im sorry, but not even sam, whos a licenced councellor, could do that for bucky. the first red flag was before bucky went into cryo and NONE of his fears/feelings were dealt w beforehand. he just goes "i cant trust my own mind" and yoink into the freezer he goes! cacw wasnt terrible w handling bucky, but it did waste a lot of potential with discussing and exploring his character and what he went through. probably bc wuhhh a man cant have FEELINGS and GOD FORBID he show and express them in a HEALTHY WAY in a superhero movie !! (that should have been averngers: civil war, bdw. marvel u actually owe us ca:serpent society)

black panther end credits. what the fuck. is all im gonna say. russos overdosed on how can we make this guys "road to recovery" LOOK like its going like pure shit but not explain why, how, when, who and where.

infinity was a sorta a fucking joke iwel. there were some good parts like the steve and bucky reunion eg. "not bad, for the end of the world" (gives me catfa vibes 😭) and "steve?" being the last words bucky said before being dusted, ik bucky wasnt supposed 2 be the focus in this movie but the fact that they made him fight again after he was supposedly "cured" (see: "semi-stable 100 year old man") was cruel and lacked the exploration it needed to justify it.

endgame is self explanatory. shit movie all-round, pain for everybody in the audience!! it was more of a mishandling of steve rather than bucky, but if we're talking abt bucky specifically, he was more neglected than mishandled. not being bothered to do his metal arm? not showing us the convo he supposedly had with steve before he left? not showing us his reaction to steves joe biden cosplay? horrible. terrible, couldn't have gone worse. once again, seb did ALL the heavy lifting. he is 99% of buckys character.

all of this doesn't even take into account steve and buckys relationship. they are the absolute focal points of each other’s characters, and it was all not just swept under the rug, but the floor was then set on fire, the room burnt to a crisp, the house demolished and then launched into oblivion.

and now to adress what u actually asked, tfatws. i also enjoyed it, but that doesnt mean i think PERSONALLY that it was well written (and thats okay). i do understand it was supposed to deal w sam more than bucky, which it did, but if im being brutally honest, tfatws bucky didnt.... feel like bucky..... which isnt to say seb didnt do a good job, bc he carried what was left of buckys character from the writing, but it was like watching the wrong shoe being put on the correct foot, if that makes sense. bucky was treated like the bad guy, stoic and pissy. "guy with a staring problem", comic fucking relief. govt mandated therapy, constant dismissal, and being thrown back into a fights without it being acknowledged why first. i have no issue w characters who want to keep fighting regardless of trauma (see: john watson) but they NEED the verbal acknowledgement AND the right support system for that plot to be acceptable and sustainable. tfatws did none of that. they reduced bucky to Cap's sidekick again (even tho he wasnt steves sidekick, it feels like he is sams imo pls dont kill me 😭). none of what should have been dealt with was dealt with, because marvel tried to solve literally global, macro-scale problems without even acknowledging the ones at home.

as sweet and technically good the ending of tfatws was, it was badly writtten, at least for bucky. marvel will never climb out of the hole, to use your words, they wrote themselves into, because of 1) the thanos storyline, snap and blip (what the fuck marvel, genuinely) 2) timeline bullshit and 3) steve leaving.

its almost like his actual character development was put on hold for tfatws. it'll be forever up in the air, with no real closure, unless everything and more that i talked about is mentioned. he'll never have the ending he actually deserves.

please do remember, characters are supposed to have arcs, not 90 degree descents into the fucking ground.

#shit #long post #my bad 😭😭😭#this is the stuff that actually shifts my brain into overdrive but i like talking abt it so thank u for this ask !!!!#buckybarnesss #i could genuinely write a dissertation on this and it would fucking bang #anyway i hope at least some of this makes sense #meta #marvel meta #bucky meta #hades' asks

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shewrites02 · 4 years

Text

Imported |Erik Killmonger x Reader |

AN: this fic was inspired by this tik tok https://www.tiktok.com/@jxdahparker/video/6825605826489748741 and Jessie Reyez ft. 6lack song imported. its really rough, I wrote in in like an hour and a half lol but I hope you guys enjoy it.

Word count: 1.1k

Warning: Light smut, and drinking

You hated yourself a little more every time you did this, but when 3 am rolled around and the thoughts wouldn't stop what choice did you have? sitting here wallowing in the memories, the feelings, the hurt.. that wasn't an option. Maybe one day you'd be strong enough to sit in this dreadful, loathsome, abhorrent hurt, but today wasn't that day.

You snatch your phone off the dresser, immediately sending a text to the unsaved number at the top of your message threads.

"You up?"

your phone dinged moments later, as if he too were waiting on the message.

"On my way."

You waited anxiously for that knock on your door. He never rung the door bell, something about that gesture was too formal, and this arrangement y'all had was anything but that.

Once he finally arrived, your heart settled in the pit of your stomach, a familiar feeling these days. You remember the days when you had to be drunk to make bad decisions, but lately all it took was a dark night... Despite that you still hurried to the door. When you opened it, he wasted no time smashing his lips against yours. No greeting, no small talk, no words. perfect.

In time the two of you found yourselves naked in the bedroom, your two bodies colliding in perfect sync. The only time you feel anything but numb is when he's inside of you. Even though you know he doesn't care about you, you know when he's whispering your name hes thinking of hers, you know when his hands travel your body they're searching for her curves. You know!

But he knows you're searching for something familiar in his strokes, he knows you're looking for his name to roll off your tongue the way his used to, he knows when hes fucking you you're thinking about him.

"Fuck Erik!" You moaned quietly.

Erik steepened your arch, forcing your face further into the mattress, angry you didn't moan the way she did, you didn't say his name the way she did. It wasn't you that he wanted to hear. Backshots were all the two of you ever did... if you couldn't see his face you could still pretend it was him.

After you came, and Erik was close he pulled out tossing the condom to the side and finishing on your back.

as the warm cum slowly cooled on your skin the memories came flushing in. How'd he sounded when he came, the way he'd force you to take all of it in your mouth. Not soon after did the after sex cuddles, and conversations fill your mind as well.

You often wondered if this made it worse, was the 45 minutes of relief worth the hours of reminiscing and pain that followed afterwards. But you'd give anything to not feel this pain anymore, even if it was only for minutes.

Erik stood zipping up his pants, and gathering his belongs and in a swift loss of thought and caught up in emotion you did the unthinkable.

"Stay... Please."

Erik glared at you. That was never part of the agreement. No missionary, no head, and no staying the night. Guidelines silently agreed upon by the both of you. But as his eyes slowly shifted about the room you saw him thinking about it. Maybe it wasn't just you who couldn't stand to be alone with your thoughts for another night.

"You got liquor?" Erik asked.

He never answered just walked into your kitchen and began ravaging through your cabinets, until finally he stumbled upon three shelves full of alcohol. He pushed aside the wine going for the Duse and Crown. He sat it on the island along with two cups of ice and two shot glasses. After pouring both of us a drink he slid mine along with a shot glass over to me.

"No relationship questions, no personal questions, don't ask me bout my past or it's a shot."

After that he turned the speaker on and began playing future loudly. It was clear he didn't give a fuck about the time or your neighbors, and honestly neither did you.

The two of you finished your first drinks before the first song finished and Erik was there pouring you two another. What is it about pain that made alcohol taste so much like water? Before you knew it you were 7 drinks down, and completely drunk. You didn't know what flowed through Erik's veins to make him so tolerant but you did not have such gene.

"What if I'm not deserving of love?.." you murmured just above the music. Erik had turned it down after your 5th drink when you started shouting the words to Lil Baby's Emotionally Scared a little too passionately.

"What if I'm never gonna be enough? Skinny enough, funny enough, pretty enough. What if nobody wants me?"

"Take a shot" Erik slid the duse shot across the island. You didn't argue just downed the shot and slipped a little further into your thoughts. Erik saw your eyes glaze over and feared tears were coming soon.

"Appearance isn't a worry for you... your beautiful any nigga can see that. if a nigga don't think you enough, if he think you too thick, too serious.. fuck that nigga. A real nigga gone see your worth. "

"Why'd you and your girlfriend break up?"

At this points words and questions were just spewing out your mouth. You knew this was breaking every rule Erik set, but drunk you didn't care. Maybe if you couldn't get answers from him you could get them from Erik.

"That's two shots." This time he pushed Crown toward you.

conversation stopped between you two and only Young MA's RNID played in the background. You fiddled your phone in your hands. This is why you stopped drinking... you couldn't stop the constant urge to text him, call him, beg him to come see you, give you closure you knew your as didn't fucking need, but maybe if you saw him one more time you could pretend he didn't do what everyone knows he did.

"Don't... don't text that nigga. " Erik reached across the table and grabbed your phone. "You gon be embarrassed and pissed off in the morning."

At this point tears swelled in your eyes and you were on the verge of full blown tears. Drinking was supposed to suppress these feeling but here they were in full effect completely washing over you.

"Why he cheat on me.. why wasn't I enough?" you balled.

You saw the regret in Erik eyes as he glanced at the empty bottles then back at you. but the more you cried the softer his eyes got.

He stood grabbing the drink from your hand and leading you to your bedroom. He laid in bed with you, his arm wrapped securely around you as you laid against his chest. Until finally you fell asleep.

The next morning you woke to Tacos, Tylenol, and water placed on your nightstand and Erik gone.

Taglist: @chaneajoyyy @missshae @shaekingshitup @https://lostennyc.tumblr.com/

So my taglist is a complete mess this is the last one I have lol if you wanted to be added or taken off please let me know

#Erik Killmonger #erik × reader #Erik Stevens #black panther #fanfic #michael b jordan #black reader

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mymindwide · 4 years

Text

It won’t be long we’ll meet again

Pairing: Ashton x Female reader

Word count: 6775

Warning: angst, feelings, smut

Author’s note: This is the chapter 2 (and closure) to ‘The end of heartache’. I hope you’ll love this too, and would just like to thank the support to those who were kind enough to write any kind of feedback on Chapter 1. :) I hope this won’t disappoint either. Take care and enjoy your read.

*****

You miss him. As plain as that sounds, sometimes the simplest words carry the heaviest burdens.

Six months ago you left your apartment with a sleeping Ashton in your bed, after he fucked you in that bed, and you convinced yourself that you don’t care about his motivation after all. You were glad it happened but eventually it just made things more difficult and painful for you.

Because although he’s never been yours, losing him broke your heart. That night you’ve spent together was… good. Obviously way more than just good. But why did he decide to come after you? He’s been in a seemingly happy relationship, then why? No doubt, he probably just felt pity for you after your confession. He always had a good and caring heart, you wouldn’t wonder if this was the case. Well, it really doesn’t matter now, does it? You took that risk; you knew what you were about to do, and as far as you remember your first thought was that you shouldn’t… yet you did nothing to stop him or rather you doing it. Now you were ready to pay the price for your decision, and you’re doing exactly this, painful or not.

Six months have passed since you left but you haven’t talked to any of them since. Well, not in live. Your communication went through emails, tweets and DMs on twitter, but those were very rare, you tried to keep it that way. After you had arrived and settled in your new living space you sent them an email with your address and the company’s name you were working at, at that time.

One day a delivery guy has left a small package for you at the reception of the building you were living in. The tiny velvet box hid a pretty white gold necklace with an angel wing medal; the gift card attached to it wished you all the best and let you know about a certain protection sentiment behind it, and was signed as C.A.L.M under that with the real signatures of Cal, Ash, Lu and Mike. An immediate smile crept on your face, because knowing the guys too well, this was either Cal’s or Ashton’s idea, and if you had to place a bet, your vote would be for Ash. No offense to Luke and Mikey, but they are not as thoughtful as the other two, and they are perfectly aware of this. This is again something that doesn’t make the disengagement easier for you, but you happily and proudly wear that beautiful necklace since the moment you have received it.

In the meantime you have changed a job, because two months ago you left that marketing position for a once in a lifetime opportunity – you were hired at iHeartRadio New York City in a program manager assistant position for one of its afternoon show. Everything was so new and fast and challenging, you had so many things to learn and do and still get used to, that you didn’t find the time and way to let the guys know about this new situation.

* * *

That day started pretty usual and normal, though at some point you should have started to suspect and prepare for the opposite. Just not long after you put your foot in the skyscraper building, there was a complete power outage; you had to call firefighters to help the trapped people escape from the elevators. You had to call the building maintenance guys to restore the electricity so the ca. 150 companies (including the city’s biggest radio station) can continue to work. You had to call some technicians to try to resettle your servers and computers. They managed to do that, however some of your fax machines have completely died due to the blackout, therefore you were asked to pass over a few important papers to one of your presenters shortly being on air, that he’d need to interview his guests that are already in the building. The entire 15th floor was your radio’s, so you picked up the folder and ran across the long hallway to reach the glass window studio on time. It was an impressive performance with 3 inches heels on your feet. After delivering the “goods” you joked to yourself that you should consider entering the next sprint competition that’s going to be held in the city. If you can do it on heels you’d have a good chance without them as well. You realized you needed to use the bathroom before returning back to your office, therefore you made a quick left turn on the corridor, but you didn’t get to the women’s restroom, because a familiar figure leaned against the wall next to the men’s restroom typing on his cellphone. You went closer, because you didn’t want to believe your eyes; your heart was pounding against your chest heavier than ever before.

“Mi-Mikey?!” as you called his name he lowered his hands with the phone in them, turned around and as he realized who dared speak to him, his eyes widened and with that drive you wrapped your arms around his neck clinging to him like a startled sparrow.

“Y/N! What are you…, how?” he hugged you back tight.

“I’m working here” you responded as you let him go and took a step back so you can check him out.

“But we thought you’re at that marketing company.”

“I know and I was, this opportunity came 2 months ago” you started to gaze your feet as you felt your conscience remind you of all the missed chances to let your friends know about this new job. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you earlier” you looked up at him with literal shame in your eyes.

“We kinda got used to it by now…” he smiled at you.

“I…I’m…”

“Just kidding, it’s so good to see you!” a grin appears on his face and that slightly reassures your nerves and remorse too.

“The others?”

“I guard the door while they are inside using whatever toilet they have to” he rolled his eyes. “I swear to you they’re still a bunch of babies, I told them to use the bathroom in the hotel, but nah, we’re good. You can see how good they are…” he points at the door of the men’s restroom making you laugh with his comment.

“What’s up Mike, now you’re talking to yourse…” – the door opened and as Luke came out first he couldn’t even finish the sentence coz after Mikey you appeared in his field of view and you got the same reaction as from Mikey.

“Y/N?!”

“Me” and you took a step towards him too to wrap your hands around his neck.

“What are you doing here?” he stroked your back quickly.

“I’ll tell you everything, just wait for the other two now so I don’t have to repeat myself four times”

“I’ll tell your girlfriends that you two beguile the lady assistants at every radio station we put our feet into…” came another familiar voice from the opening door, and this time you could surprise Calum.

“Man, I think they wouldn’t mind this one…” smiled Luke.

“Cal!!!!!!” you jumped into his neck and he held you tight to himself lifting you up a bit, your feet not touching the ground below you.

“Holy shit, girl, what are…” he started asking the obvious question as he put you down back on your feet.

“I know, what am I doing here, and I swear I’m going to answer just…”

And this time you were the one who couldn’t finish your sentence coz the door has been opened for the third time and Ashton stepped outside looking confused for a second at the sight of the little group gathering until he found the incongruous member of his band. The others fell silent as if someone has stopped the time and cut you out of this scene. Actually, time has stopped for you too, because you weren’t exactly prepared for this spectacle either, seeing him obviously brought back memories, but even if those memories didn’t exist, he looked so handsome, so good-looking in his set that consisted of a black torn jeans and a black button-up shirt with the first few buttons being unbuttoned leaving a perfect view at his subtly muscular chest, that you felt a little bit lost at that moment.

“Y/N?”

“Hi Ash…” you bit your bottom lip to feel some kind of pain that holds you back from collapsing inside and burst into tears in front of them. He couldn’t take his eyes off of you, so you took that first step to hug him too, though evidently not with the same vehemence as you did with the other three. Your hands rested on his back and only for a few seconds, his hands mirrored your movements on your back, a few gentle caresses and you let each other go pretty quickly. Quick enough to feel this hug awkward, but you guess that’s what you get when you fuck with someone you consider a friend even though you feel way more for him.

“Hi, sweetheart” he smiled at you and this gesture eased the tension in you enough to get your shit together.

You took a short glance at the other three behind you, and they stared at you two as if they were watching bombs that could explode at any minute. Is it possible that they know something about what has happened between us months ago? Ahh, anyway, I have no time for this now, now that these four stand in front of me, still a total miracle and a quite big shock at the same time. You took a big breath and started telling them very quickly about your job change.

“Who did you come to?” you asked from any of them.

“Greg? Is it Greg?” Lu asked back.

“Ah so it’s you guys who he’s waiting for. Actually I just brought his papers for him, so he can ask questions from you” you grinned.

“I thought it worked a bit more modern these days” Ash smirked.

“It does, smartass, we just had a… bit of a situation in the morning, and all electronics went to shit due to a power outage.”

“And if it wasn’t for that, we wouldn’t have you right here right now” Cal came and gave you a half hug.

“Guys, I missed you so much, you have no idea.”

“Boys, we have one minute left…” Mike warned you and you literally saw the panic in his eyes as he looked around your little branch.

“What is it Mikey?” you asked.

“It’s just… we have to go, and I assume you have to go back to work too, but we’re staying for the night and leave only tomorrow, so I thought we could meet for a dinner somewhere? I mean, only if you want it, too, of course!” he sputtered and was eyeing Cal and Luke, though Ashton got a glance from him too.

“I’d be more than happy to do that with you guys” you shrugged with a smile on your face.

“Since you live here, you can recommend a restaurant maybe?”

“What about Ceci? It’s Italian and it’s only three corners down this avenue.”

“Sounds awesome. When will you finish?”

“At 4.”

“Then 6? Is that good?”

“Then 6, it is.”

“See you at Ceci, baby” Cal hugged you first, and all the others joined him, resulting in you melting in a group hug.

“Good luck and see you soon” you waved them goodbye, and with a huge smile on your face and a long-awaited excitement in your heart you headed back to your office.

* * *

“Target #1 in the building” Cal made a comment.

“We can see that as well, Captain Obvious” snapped Mikey.

“Dude, calm down, and let me remind you that this whole thing was your idea.”

“I know… thanks again, Captain Obvious.”

“If you won’t stop with the captain thing, I’ll hit you on the head.”

“Would you please shut up for a minute, both of you. I can’t see from the noise you two make” Luke intervenes.

“Anyway, what’s your problem? We’re good so far, aren’t we?” Cal continues.

“But what if Ash sensed something? Weren’t we too obvious with the ‘buying gifts for the girls’ thing?”

“Don’t think so man, last time I checked we do have girlfriends…” Luke tried to reassure Mike.

“But Cal doesn’t.”

“And? I focus on myself right now!” snapped back Cal resentfully.

“Dude, that’s not the point! Good for you. I just want this to work.”

“He’s gonna be here.”

“Young amigos, if we don’t go anywhere I have to ask you to get out of the car” says the driver of the taxi they sat in. “You know I have a big family, have to give them food.”

“Luke, give me 40 bucks.”

“Why me?”

“Coz your net worth is the highest, and I’m just a poor guitarist from Sydney” scoffs Mikey.

“If this is gonna work, Ash owes me…” mumbles Luke as he slaps the money in Mike’s hand at the passenger’s seat.

“Are you sure you don’t have Scottish or Jewish ancestors…?” Mike side eyed Luke. “If this is gonna work, I’ll personally give this back to you, you mean bastard.”

“Oh shut up, Clifford.”

“Does this cover an hour route?” Mike holds out the money to the driver.

“Si senor, it’ll do.”

“Guys! Guys, target #2 is approaching the building…” Cal’s voice warned the quarreling couple, and all four men in the taxi looked in the direction of the restaurant on the other side of the road.

* * *

You completely lost your sense of time after you went home from the studio. To your biggest luck you have found a flat incredibly close to your workplace, actually it’s halfway through between the studio and the restaurant, so you had time to try out at least 20 clothing combinations for the dinner. Based on how the day had started you would not have dared dream that it would end like this. You came here with the thought you’ll never see them again, and here you are, you’ll have a date with four of your best friends, and that makes you beyond excited. The long and short of it is that you ended up 15 minutes earlier at the restaurant, wearing your favorite black torn jeans with a simple V-neck white t-shirt and matching black high heels.

You were checking your phone every minute preparing yourself for them to write you in the last possible second that they’re sorry but won’t be able to make it, but no message has arrived, so you started becoming very excited by every passing minute. You were about to put your phone on the table when you looked up from it and glimpsed Ashton walking towards the table you were sitting at, the table that was booked by Mr. Clifford for 5. You rose from your seat to greet him and grabbed the opportunity to check him out very quickly and hopefully not too strikingly.

“You look wonderful” he hugged you with one hand “…and I like the jeans” he added grinning at you as his eyes lowered to the knee part of your jeans where it’s been torn.

“Well, I have to admit, there’s a slight Irwin impact on my fashion sense regarding jeans.”

“I’ll have a greater legacy than Versace” he joked.

“Ahh as to Versace, have you watched the second…”

“I have and I had no one I could talk about it with” he said semi-sadly, semi-excitedly not even waiting for you to finish the sentence.

“I know, me neither. I missed our regular series talk shows” you smiled at him.

“Anyway, it was definitely shockingly brilliant.”

He hardly finished the sentence; the receptionist came towards you and stopped next to your table. You looked up at her simultaneously.

“Sorry for interrupting you, I would like to apologize for the inconvenience, but Mr. Clifford just phoned us and let us know, that the remaining 3 person won’t be joining you, therefore I’d like to escort you to a quieter, more private table for two, if you don’t mind” she has flashed her nicest smile at you two.

Both Ashton and you looked at your phones at the same time looking for some explanation behind this situation but neither of you got any messages from any of the guys and looked up from your phones as confused as the other.

“We haven’t ordered yet, so it’s fine for me…” he told the receptionist but he looked at you all the way waiting for an approval.

“Yeah, it’s okay, of course” you blinked still confused.

“Thank you very much. As a compensation for the inconvenience, tonight’s drinks are on the restaurant.”

You stood up and followed the lady in front of you, while looking at each other conspiratorially, because you knew something that the management of the restaurant did not - namely neither Ash nor you drank any alcohol, so the worst that can happen is the mineral water stock will be less with a few bottles.

As soon as you put your bottoms down on your seats, a waitress came to take your order, and to your waters you ordered a Caesar salad and Ash stayed with a steak though he chose salad as garnish too.

“Never thought you were the salad type” Ash noted.

“Believe me, I am still not, but you should have seen the food I was poisoning myself with since being here. My body really can use a lighter meal now. I’m literally craving it.”

“Can’t blame you. I guess everyone’s first thing to do when arriving in New York is to try all the food we see on Man vs. Food.”

“Yeah, that’s how I got to know the city, basically” you laughed. “Uhm, as to those three bastards you call your bandmates and I called friends… I assume you didn’t know about this” you cocked an eyebrow at him.

“No, I didn’t. They told me they’re going gift shopping, and that they’ll join us in time.” “Obviously they won’t now” the right corner of your mouth pulled in a sarcastic smile.

“If you don’t feel like it, we don’t have to do this…”

“Ash, no, it’s not why I…” your hand has swung quicker than you thought and by the time you realized, it already rested on Ash’s forearm, trying to keep him from standing up from the table. As soon as you saw why he’s looking at his arm you jerked your hand back.

“Hey, I didn’t plan to go anywhere“ he smiled at you seeing you blushing as he really just adjusted his chair.

“Sorry…” you whispered feeling ashamed, not exactly knowing why though.

“No, it’s okay… Actually, I’d like to talk to you about something.”

You swallowed as if you had known what’s coming.

“Can we talk about us?”

“Us?”

“Yes, us and that particular night. Should I remind you of…”

“No. It’s not something that just disappears. Not after how we said goodbye” you tucked your lips between your teeth as an automatic reflex because you felt your pulse getting higher, and your anxiety creeping up.

“I wouldn’t exactly call it a goodbye…”

“But it was.”

“Why didn’t you wake me up when you left? We could have talked.”

“You know, I thought about it a lot since then. Even felt certain guilt. But that day was emotional enough for me, besides my life here was already pretty much prepared. At that moment it felt right.”

“And now?”

“Ash… Why did you come to me that night in the first place?” you started losing your patience as you felt him calling you to account. You wanted to show him he’s not the only one with questions.

“What do you think?”

“For months I was convinced it was out of pity from your side.”

“Out of pity… But did that really feel like it though?”

“I don’t know, Ash. Again, that day was hard enough and you didn’t make the things easier either.”

“Did you know you left a mark on me? Nail scratches on both my shoulder blades” he smiled. “A few days later I became single.”

“I didn’t want to get you in trouble” you told him with honesty and worry in your voice. You really had no idea that they are no longer together.

“It has nothing to do with it; I just thought I’ll let you know, since it made me smile when I noticed it at home. And as far as I remember it was me who knocked on your door…”

“But I could have told you to leave…” you quickly closed your eyes as instant memory moments rushed through your mind about the exact scene you were talking about. How he kissed you and picked you up in his lap, and how much you didn’t exactly protest against it, but kissed him back and wrapped your legs around his waist instead… About how your body reacted to his in a millisecond.

“Did you regret what we’ve done back then?”

“No” you said after a few seconds of silence. “But it just made things more difficult for me.”

“As of?”

“Leaving behind what I wanted to leave behind. Forgetting you” you felt a sudden sadness as you uttered these words aloud.

You didn’t even notice how easily you eased into your conversation and that the anxiety you felt at the beginning just disappeared most likely thanks to the calmness that flowed out of Ashton, the soothing tone of his voice, the way he spoke to you.

You loved how honestly and openly you could talk about this, when it could have turned out enormously awkward as well.

“And you? Did you regret that you came to my apartment that night?” you rested your elbow on the table while supported your head with your palm.

“No. It made me realize a few things.”

“As of?” you smiled.

“You know I don’t believe in too many things, but what I believe in is that there are no coincidences. Us meeting here, totally accidentally, has to have a greater purpose. And I’d like to tell you something and I’d like you to listen to me. I want you to know that I liked you all along. From the beginning. I always thought we had a special connection and we understood each other quite well. But I was stupid and thought we’re friends, and it’s not gonna lead anywhere, you know, you don’t shit in your own backyard… And this is what I regretted. That simply out of fear I didn’t even try to give it a chance, and when you confessed six months ago it kinda slapped me in the face. The only thing I could tell you was that I was sorry. That’s what I felt sorry about. Not you. My own self and my missed opportunity. That I was satisfied with less when I could have something more valuable too. You helped me open my eyes and as it hit me, I wanted to see you. That’s why I visited you that night.”

As he said all these things to you, your heart just wished to leave your body. Never in your wildest dreams could you imagine that he, in any way, could feel the same like you, and now here you are.

The whirlwind came and you looked down at the table, lips trembling and the first stream of tears rolled down your face. He reached for your hand, gently grabbed it with his and you squeezed it letting all the remaining tension and anxiety go, as his thumb brushed your skin.

“So now you know. Pity never was on the table.”

Wiping those few stray tear drops you smiled at him as you still hold hands.

“This whole situation is because of me, coz I fucked that up, and for this I am sorry too.”

“Ash… it doesn’t matter now. I’m glad you’re here, I’m glad we’re here. And I’d just like to hug you now, so bad” a liberated shred of laughter escaped your lips.

“I can promise you we’ll get round to it” he flashed a smile at you squeezing your hand once more before he let it go, as your ordered meals had arrived.

* * *

While eating you could continue with much lighter topics; he let you into their plans and ongoing work with their new material and all the shenanigans you missed while being in the other side of the states, and you told him about the musical legends and celebs you had the pleasure to meet thanks to your last two months at the radio. It was around 8pm when you left Ceci, and tried to find a secluded place on the sidewalk where you aren’t in the way of others and they aren’t in yours.

“Can I collect my hug now?” you smiled at him and just hoped you don’t sound too desperate, though you were not sure whether he would care at all if you did.

You certainly did not care. Your heart got lighter, your eyes shined brighter after your dinner, and just feeling him this close, like never before, filled you with such happiness you never thought you’ll feel again. He pulled you closer and you went upon your tiptoes to wrap your hands around his neck while his arms slithered around your waist wreathing you into a tight hug. Your senses were looking for the familiar feelings - his citrus scent filled up your nose, your arms rested safely on his wide shoulders providing you the sense of security that you felt only with him.

You very slowly let go of him and stood back on your feet, as your eyes kept holding onto each other’s.

His fingertips ghosted along your arms going down to reach their destination in your palms.

“Can I kiss you?” his eyes hiding a slight insecurity were searching yours.

“Are you really asking for permission when…” you smiled.

“I am, because this is our first date” he wasn’t waiting for you to finish.

“Then please, kiss me” you whispered still smiling.

His hands let go of yours and found their new place on your waist pulling you closer and on the side of your neck angling your face slightly upwards so he can attach his lips on yours while your hands slid up to rest on his chest.

This kiss was different from what you shared the last time, of course no wonder, since that night wasn’t exactly about the most extensive and deepest exploration of the other. You simply didn’t have time for that, and weren’t in that particular headspace.

This kiss was feathery, gentle and exploratory – the kind that makes you lose your mind.

You felt yourself in a dream and as the seconds went by, you sensibly became needier; his fingertips pressed harder on your waist while your hands grasped his shirt on his stomach. A sense rushed through your veins, a recognition, that made you feel almost ashamed and shy for wanting to be with him again.

A loud honk reminded you that you’re in the middle of the street, so you slowly let each other go, and still feeling the ghost of his lips on yours you leaned your forehead against his collarbone slightly shaking your head as you let out a heavier sigh.

“Damn…”

“What?” his tone gave away that he’s smiling.

“I feel like I should be ashamed of the thoughts that are filling my mind right now.”

“If they are anything similar to mine, then yeah, you should…”

His remark made you chuckle into his chest. You lifted your eyes on him and you felt exactly the same way as you did six months ago that night when you stood in the hall of your apartment staring at each other, trying to read from the other’s eyes and face. And again, just like back then, there was no question to which the answers couldn’t have been found in your eyes.

“Come…” you intertwined your fingers and took a few steps backwards never breaking the eye contact.

“Where are we…” he asked as you started heading down the road.

“My flat is two minutes away.”

* * *

“Wake up you two! They are out!” Cal shouted, and the other three gentlemen in the car hoisted in their seats. “Not you, Pedro, you can sleep back.”

“This is my car, I wanna watch!” the driver stared out his window sticking to the windowpane, and Cal just shrugged.

“Awww, they are hugging”

“Thanks for the live broadcast, mate, but I’d rather check it myself” Luke just tried to push Cal out of the way so he can see something with his own eyes too.

“Oh, that senorita is la belleza; I’d hug her too…” Pedro remarked and his passengers shared a quick glance that made obvious what they think about their plus one – they managed to get stuck with a perv.

“Woah woah woah, oh my god, come on Ash, you get it dude!” shouted Cal as they watched their two targets embrace in a kiss.

“Yesss” Luke cried out joining in the celebration.

“Could you please move over, that’s my friend, I have to see them” Mike tried to push the driver away.

“I wanna see, I wanna see” their ad hoc driver fought back, and as he did, his elbow pressed the honk on the steering wheel.

All four of them pulled their heads down immediately, searching for cover behind the doors of the vehicle.

“Man, you can ruin everything” Mikey yelled at the driver grumpily.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t want to cause trouble” their driver justified himself.

Carefully and very slowly they all rose from their cover, and saw the targets still standing on the sidewalk, although not kissing.

“Let’s just hope they’ll find a hotel, if I were them I’d do…” Cal made the comment.

“Dude, you need to get laid soon…” Luke shook his head in response to Cal cocking his eyebrow.

“Just like he will be…?!” Cal indicated out the window, pointing at the pair as they hold hands and the girl takes a few steps backward still facing their bandmate.

“Damn, I’m a genius…” grinned Mikey.

* * *

While waiting for the elevator in the building you hardly could let each other catch your breath, being able to kiss him without any heartbreak or shame felt beyond liberating.

“Waiiiit, shit” he pulled away from you.

“What’s wrong?”

“This time I don’t have any condoms, I wasn’t expecting… the whole press tour or this evening to take such a turn” he whispered.

“This only means… you have to… pull out in time…” you kissed it on his lips. “Can you do that for me?”

“Do you trust me?” he cupped your face looking in your eyes with his very serious ones. After all you were about to play a dangerous game, that can have consequences, so you had to be sure, you take this risk. But you trusted him more than anyone.

“You know I do.”

After getting back to your flat, between passionate kisses you helped each other get rid of your clothes and shortly you found yourselves naked on the couch, discarded clothes here and there on the floor around you.

Ash sat on the couch; you stood in front of him as he, kissing the skin on your stomach, pushed your last piece of cloth you had on -your panties- down your legs.

Straddling him you were holding onto his shoulders, and you slowly ran down your nails on his chest to his stomach very lightly. He most likely worked out more in the last six months; his abs became more defined than what you were remembering.

He reached up to pull you closer by the back of your neck merging you in a kiss that you were getting so many in the last 20 minutes from, and yet you couldn’t get enough.

You slid your hand lower to take his hardness and as you wrapped your fingers around it he moaned into your mouth just fueling your desire to give him as much pleasure as you can. You quickly started caressing him, smearing his pre-cum on his tip, before you lifted yourself on your knees enough to position his cock over your entrance.

“Wait, are you rea…”

“Am I ready?” you smiled at him and lead his tip over your wetness a few times. “I couldn’t be readier” you leaned towards him to kiss him again rewarding him for his thoughtfulness, since last time he made sure you were ready for him, now your kisses and touches ensured it.

You leaned your forehead against his as you lowered yourself on him, and a soft whimper escaped both of you at the same time.

“Fuck, woman…”

“God, you’re magic…” you gasped.

“We are” he tilted his head back against the headrest of the couch, leaving his throat free for you to lick and kiss.

After getting used to feeling his size inside you again, with the guidance of his hands on your hips you started to grind your hips, first just slowly, up and down, then slightly increasing the pace you were riding him harder letting him fully fill you up.

Your nails scratched down from his shoulders down to his chest leaving a light mark.

“Old habits die hard?” he breathed out making you smile with it as you brushed your fingers over the marks and you leaned forward to lick into his mouth, your hips never stopping with bouncing up and down on him.

„Is this good?” you asked him as you reached behind you, running your fingers around his balls squeezing them a little. Although you already knew the answer seeing the look in his eyes and hearing the hitches in his breathing. His body gave obvious responses to your touch.

„You haven’t been this chatty last time…” he swallowed back a groan.

„Well, last time you haven’t been this single, either…”

You were like fire on fire, perfectly igniting each other’s arousal. It was like you never felt yourself this alive.

He cupped your breasts in his hands and as you slowed your hips he took his time to caress and massage them, kiss them and suck on your nipples, circling his tongue around them sending you into hyperspace with all this sensation. Now you had the chance to discover what you couldn’t six months earlier.

Your movements slowed down as your thighs started to tire, and Ash sensing this took control over the things from then. His hands found their way back on your hips and he started to pound into you in the same rhythm you moved on him. It’s been a new sensation and his name fell from your lips like a prayer as your pleasure started to build in your core.

“Please don’t stop, I’m so close” you whispered in his ear whimpering before you took his earlobe with his earring into your mouth pulling on it a little.

He kept your hips in place and this time it was really just him moving his hips a bit faster than before and you screamed as your walls spamsed around his cock in you. He threw his head back and as his grip loosened on your hips you started moving again riding out your own climax.

He looked back at you and you smiled at him in your delirium, kissing him deeply for the pleasure he gave you.

Reaching under your butt he stood up and took you into your bedroom, putting you down on the bed.

“Where do you want me?” you asked as you really were ready to give him anything he wants or needs in any position.

“Just lie down. I’d like to see your pretty face as I take you.”

With only this one sentence he sent a jolt through you again and you did as he told, lying on your back you were waiting for his promise to be fulfilled.

Leaning over you he entered you again and with a louder moan you welcomed back that now familiar and oh so good feeling of having him inside you. This time he picked up a quicker pace that he slowed down on purpose from time to time, you saw him struggling more and more as he tried to lengthen our moments as long as he can, but six months was six months for him too…

“Ash, don’t hold it back” you caressed his face. “You can come. I need you to. We’ll have plenty of time to do this…” you brushed his lower lip with your thumb before he leaned down to kiss you.

After a few more thrusts, he pulled his cock out of you, rested it on your abdomen for a second, and looking down, seeing his length lying under your stomach you wished he could put it back to feel him finish off inside you.

He took his cock in his hand and started to pump it slowly until you reached down almost immediately to replace his hand with yours keeping your constant eye contact. Seeing the lust still shining in his eyes and hearing his groans through his gasping as your warm palm covers his soft skin lightly twirling and moving on it back and forth, paying special attention to the sensitive part right under his tip was the crown of this night for you. Without moving your head, only your eyes wandered down to capture the moment of his cum spilling out onto your stomach, your eyes immediately found back to his, your teeth grazing your bottom lip. Ash’s soft moans filled the room, the moans you could hear with your ears but feel with your soul. Not stopping with stroking him, you slowed down with your movements and he leaned down to kiss you while you still kept his length in your hand, your thumb wiping the last drops off of his tip.

“I’ll bring a cloth” he whispered on your lips after taking a look down at your stomach covered with the drops of his cum.

“You’ll find some in the bathroom cabinet.”

You heard him run the tap and soon he came back with a wet cloth helping you get clean, then wiped himself too. After taking it back to the bathroom, he came back and lied down next to you.

“I like your necklace” he stroked your jewelry hanging around your neck.

“It’s so beautiful, and I love it so much, I didn’t take it off since I received it.”

“Could we give this a chance? Maybe the timing wasn’t right back then, but it can be now. I want this. I want us. I want you.”

“If you’re working on to see me cry again, you’re doing it right” you smiled at him.

“I’m dead serious” he reached out to you and stroked your face.

“I know. And I’d like this too.” you took his hand in yours kissing into his palm.

“Come home to us.”

“I want to. And I will. But I have to close my barely begun life here first” you laughed.

“I won’t let you out of my reach again.”

“You better not, Irwin.”

He drew a cross over his heart with his pointer finger.

“In the morning we can work everything out. And this time I’ll be around.”

“Promise?” he smirked.

“Promise” you drew a cross over your heart too and leaning over him you sealed your promise on his lips with a kiss before he playfully pulled you onto his body.

Caressing and kissing each other you slowly quieted, and with tangled limbs you finally fell asleep in each other’s arms.

* * *

I can’t recall the last time I was this happy in my life.

Imagining a life where I open my eyes in the morning and the first thing I catch a glimpse of is the beautiful and peaceful face of the man I love was only a dream for me for so many years.

But it’s funny how life can make up for its own mistakes.

I remember the girl from six months earlier. How bad she wanted to touch him, how bad she wanted to kiss him awake, how bad she wanted to put her hand over his heart just to feel its even beating.

And now I’ll just do exactly that.

#ashton irwin #ashton irwin x reader #5sos #ashton irwin fic #fic time #fic by me

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queerpontmercy · 3 years

Note

pick four characters and then roll a d4 for each of these numbers to determine which char to answer for: 1 4 5 6 17 22 24 26 39 27 51 57 60

tumblr did me so dirty but I finally got all of these in one doc, thank you <3 I decided to alternate between my Beam Saber pilots for character #4, so we have Solace “Trash Panda“ Altiora the infiltrator, and Dr. Finch Tandem, the officer/cat herder. Put under a cut because fuck this is so long...

What does Solace typically keep in his pockets?

I rolled a 3 for Leucien, but I already described his pockets, so...Solace is messy and generally keeps a tube of lipstick within easy reach, which means inevitably he’s also got a few tissues stuffed in a pocket from the last time he had to apply blot it. Other than that, he always has at least one knife on him, and that could feasibly be in a pocket. No, he’s not just happy to see you.

Other than that, you know he’d never tell but honestly? I think he keeps his old prayer beads on his person, despite having left the Cenotaph both physically and spiritually. There’s something grounding about them: something organic in a world full of unforgiving machinery and vastly unknowable AIs, perhaps. It’s still soothing. Shut up.

4. If Tanith was a work of art, how would you describe her?

This is such an interesting question for Tanith-- the most important bit for her would be that it’s something functional and beautiful, made lovelier still by use. A well-loved sea shanty with lyrics that keep time out on the water, a handsome medicine chest with fanciful carvings of beasts on each wooden panel…oooooh maybe a set of three nesting clay pots/jars! The first one is big and solid, rough gray-green with a fitted lid and decorations like barnacles and limpets, and below that is one with blue and brown glazes, pooling and mixing into each other, and the last (smallest) one is delicate and porcelain, almost opalescent from within where the light hits it, with the most simple, graceful curved shape It’s meant to house something rare and precious.

5. How does Tanith express she’s comfortable?

She doesn’t like to sit in her emotions or thoughts, and spends a lot of time trying to transmute them into practical action. You’d know she’s comfortable if she let herself be still, taking in the world with quiet acceptance, and told you what was on her mind-- what she saw, or remembered, or was thinking about, without worry, just being.

6. How does Fen express that they’re uncomfortable?

Fenestra argues about stupid shit-- pedantry in particular is such a refuge. Having a hill to die on helps her feel slightly in control, since feeling powerless is definitely one of the things that makes her most uncomfortable. She’d never admit to it, but it’s also a way to knock Threats down a peg or two.

17. Does Leucien swear? What’s his favorite phrase/word?

For sure, but since Leu is 3 feet tall, he almost certainly got the “ohhhh i had no idea, you’re so iiiiinnocent~” treatment after saying one (1) fuck word. I was tonight years old when I learned he’s partial to “oh balls,” which is decidedly not one of my (Sketch’s) phrases, but I guess it makes sense intrinsically? Most swear words are either profane, sexual, or insulting/derogatory. Gnomes in this campaign aren’t religious, culturally speaking, and he’s not the kind to start a fight.

Now that means there’s actually a good chance that he has at least once, in a fit of extreme frustration, blurted out “Aerum’s b--” before very hastily correcting to “face, face, I was gonna say face.”

I’m shocked I have so much to say about this, but...he was an academic, and I also have a strong hunch that he had a terrible little pretentious phase where all his swear words came from Old Gnomish or Dwarvish or oooh, maybe languages his old friend Aza had picked up, but...at this point he reasons it’s better to say the things in Everendian/Common if you want people to know what you’re saying.

22. What kind of person would Finch never side with?

Finch would never side with a landlord cop bully. Well, definitely not a landlord or cop either. But man, the kind of leader who throws their weight around for the sake of it and intimidates innocent people into carrying out their orders? They really, truly despise ‘em. And leaders who treat the individuals under their wing as pieces of a calculated risk rather than full people. They’d honestly rather die than become that kind of leader.

24. What’s a controversial food opinion Leucien would have?

Pineapple on pizza is good actually you guys are just mean

Leu thinks the fact that there’s such a thing as “controversial food opinions” is fascinating. He’ll try anything once, so point-blank disregarding something as disgusting feels like snobbery to him. And even badly-cooked food can tell you so much about the people who make it, so and that learning’s a pleasure in and of itself.

26. What would Tanith want for her funeral?

In Tanith’s culture, dying orcs are dressed in burial clothes, shrouded, and left to make their “final voyage” on their own in quiet contemplation. She would uphold this tradition. Burial and scattering of ashes at sea are common, but I actually think Tanith might want to be buried at the “interfaith” shrine she established on the mainland post-campaign-- Ishka willing, to be its guardian and perhaps, in a way, guide the lost on their journeys after her death.

She would certainly want her dear friends and party members to speak in her memory at a ceremony, especially Cae and Avris, who saw her through so much. Nothing prepared. Just what comes from the heart in the moment. Perhaps she has also transcribed an old Orcish lullaby for her beloved Anya to play at the end, with the music drifting through the air and quietly dissipating, like sea foam as it hits the shore.

27. If they were a ghost, how would Solace haunt in the afterlife?

Solace would be such a chaotic asshole ghost but he’d have the time of his (after)life. He already has such a great time being a local cryptid as it is, convincing people that an abandoned amusement park or shopping mall might be haunted. It’d be even worse in death. The thing is, if he was a ghost and knew nothing could hurt him, he’d be even more unsubtle, he’d really want to see the impact of his tricks and shenanigans for once after a lifetime or lurking.

39. What does Finch believe their party lacks?

Finch knows that their squad has each other’s backs in the practical way-- they’ve seen teammates trauma out or take major damage protecting each other. But they think that what the Intrepid is missing is emotional vulnerability, and it’s important? If we’re not honest with ourselves, how can we be honest with each other? It keeps them up at night sometimes.

51. What makes Tanith a hypocrite?

She’ll forgive everyone except herself, obviously. Since she was able to get some closure with her ex Kleiya, who didn’t die but was transported to another plane, she hasn’t been nearly as consumed with guilt over who she used to be, but still? She’ll tell someone not to burn out all at once, she’ll tell someone they’re good just as they are, and never believe it herself. :/

57. How does the way Leucien acts seemingly contradict his ability scores?

FitD scores don’t translate as well, so...Leu it is!

He’s got +3 charisma, but he’s the most awkward man in all of existence and can’t be normal for even two seconds. I actually don’t think it’s that contradictory; charisma is a force of personality, after all, and Leu’s got that. He became an object of cult worship in a matter of months, after all...But also I do think he’s got an endearing, bookish, understated charm, and hey, that’s a kind of charisma. D&D often makes charisma out to be the smooth-talking seduction stat, but I really enjoy when it can be more than that.

He’s also got decently high wisdom, but I’ve been playing him with small dog energy. We’ll figure it out, I suppose.

60. Who does Fenestra go to when she needs to bounce ideas off of someone?

Fenestra has a littol greyromantic wtf-is-this crush on Eli, another of the Oracle’s apprentices. :3 They have honed different ways of seeing the future. Fen captures big fragmented portents that don’t make sense until later, whereas Eli is a lot more scrupulous, and tends to focus on details and possibilities, mapping out the pieces of a butterfly effect. They really respect his different way of thinking; it’s been incredibly helpful, and if she were feeling mentally stuck Fen would go to him, no question. He’d listen.

#dnd asks #tanith #fenestra #leucien #solace #finch

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the-headbop-wraith · 3 years

Text

3 _ 48 _ We Are the Journey

They must have been talking for an hour at least. Arthur had three refills, which he was paying for; up until Mamma Pepper insisted she get the bill.

“I invited you. So, that’s how it’ll be.” Her glare was unwavering, and Arthur wasn’t keen on arguing.

The conversation dipped into that dreaded topic, easing in a piece at a time, working it’s way through a wall Arthur hoped was fortified after months of building. He didn’t want to deter, he couldn’t abandon it. The girls were doing well. Sometimes, the sad days came and the pain was hard to work through. It was… a difficult trial for children, it was always difficult. But, they had good memories waiting for them, to comfort and ease them home. That was important to remember.

“I knew it would be hard for them, most of all,” he admitted, quietly.

“It was hard on all of us,” Mamma Pepper acknowledged. “But yes, they adored him. There are some things we cannot heal from, and some, we become stronger because we refuse to falter. It isn’t easy.” She reached a hand up and wiped at a thin tear on her cheek.

Arthur sighed, “Um, You… you’re right. I know you’re right.” He nodded.

“I want you to know, you and Vivi are always welcomed to the Pepper Paradiso. You are always welcomed home. Your Uncle has been there for you, but I wished you had relied on all of your family, as well.”

Arthur adjusted his arm in the sling, his collar was a little tired. “I didn’t… it’s hard to go forward. Where to begin, and how to? There’s a place to start, but I can’t figure out how.” He pinched his brow, his hand trembled. Across from him, Mamma Pepper shifted in her seat.

“Lewis would never blame you for what happened.” In all of their conversation, this was the first time she said his name. It struck a chord in Arthur’s chest. “I know this without a doubt. It was an accident.”

Arthur’s choked, “Of course it was an accident.” She wasn’t there. She didn’t see him, all bones and hollowed suit, angry. Vengeful and furious, seeking something without substance. Don’t say that. Don’t think that. “But… it hurts to look at you guys. Remind myself I… he was taken from you.” He took the side of his vest and pressed it to his eye.

“No one stole Lewis from us.” Arthur winced, and sort of shrugged. “You and Vivi, and He, left together on your quest – searching for something Pappa and I couldn’t give him. I knew when we first found him, it was inevitable.” She set her hand upon the table and balled her fist up. “He was our son, but we couldn’t hold onto him forever.”

Arthur took a deep breath and exhaled. Calm, slow breaths. One after the other. He pulled himself up and took another sip of his drink. The rich warmth was a stark contrast to his soul’s turmoil.

“Is this too much?”

Arthur shook his head and offered a thin smile. “Not at all. I think, I’ve needed to talk for a while. Vii, she—” How to explain? “—she’s got some sense of Lew, and we’ll talk. It’s not the same as before, but she was… she’s there for me, too. We talk.”

Mamma Pepper nodded and leaned back in her seat. “Sometimes, that is the way life is. We encounter unexpected events, or thing’s beyond our control happen. They are beyond us, and nonnegotiable. It can hurt, and that pain will endure. Maybe the sorrow we feel will never go away, not entirely.” She inched up one shoulder. “Sometimes it’s good to never let that pain go, other times it is the strongest thing we can do. For our own good, and for the people we love. You children were happy, and that’s more than what I could have asked for. I don’t want you to leave us, as well.”

“I can’t. I mean, I won’t’,” Arthur insisted. “There was so much to do, even more that I couldn’t deal with. I had to get some… distance. Escape from myself, and blot out what I couldn’t do. I should’ve done something, anything. And I can’t… explain that amount of regret away.”

“It was not your fault,” she affirmed, with authority.

“It— I know..” Arthur bit back, cinching one eye shut. “I remember what is was like before, and now….” Don’t go there. Don’t talk about that. He shut his eye. “I keep the memories of the good close, they drag me back from the brink on my worst days. It’s been… a work. A lot of work. I don’t know how I keep going, how to get past this.” He set his fist on the table, clenched like he held a scorched bar.

“You and Vivi went through so much. I don’t want you thinking nonsense, such being that the kids or my husband resent you. Utter nonsense. We could never. Absolutely, never-ever.” She studied the false arm in it’s sling, barely functioning aside from a twitch. Lance said the prosthetic was a marvel, though she didn’t understand the significance and Lance never spoke of the events. She only knew it was related to the loss of Lewis Pepper.

“I understand that you do not feel ready,” she continued, with a gentle tone. “I will squelch those thoughts that you couldn’t be welcomed home. Our doors will always be open to you, whenever you feel the time is right. It might help Vivi, or not… I can’t say for certain. Since I last saw her….” She sighed.

Arthur nodded. “I have thought about it. But we… we tried to keep busy, no stops. Full momentum. It felt… right.” His breath trembled. “I wanted to be in the right headspace. His memory is so strong, it’d be… I don’t know how to do it. I have this image of him coming from the kitchen, wearing that dorky apron.”

“Dorky… apron?”

Arthur snorted, “It suited him.” Mamma Pepper smiled. She set a hand on Arthur’s fist, and molded his grip until the knuckles relaxed.

“You and Vivi came back safe, that is more than what we could have hoped for. We have closure in that sense. And still, the both of you are out there, keeping Lewis’ memory alive. To us, it means so much, and I couldn’t think to ask anything more of you both.” She patted Arthur’s hand. “The only thing I can do, is make sure you know that you will always be loved. That hasn’t changed. It will never change.”

She leaned further over, tilting her head to catch a glimpse of Arthur’s eyes. “Look at me, hun. Look at me.” She waited until Arthur raised his gaze, even if only a smidgen. “You and Vivi are as important to us, as Lewis was. You shouldn’t run away from your family. We will support you, talk to you – when you don’t know what to do. We will listen, and if you can’t stand on your own two feet, we’ll carry you.” She smiled, but just a little. “It hurts me that you would think, we could do anything but love you.”

Arthur blinked. “I think it was the ideal you could still love, even after what happened?”

Mamma Pepper opened one eye and peered at him, heatedly. “Then you need to learn that it is okay to go on loving yourself, hun.” She took her hand back, and took up the mug with what little contents remained of her fifteenth drink. “I’m Hellbent on seeing you through this. At your pace. Got that?”

Arthur exhaled the stale air from his lungs and sat a minute, thoughts creaking through the minefield of his turbulent emotions. He wanted to tell her so badly, do something potentially horrible. But he couldn’t. This wasn’t the time. Perhaps there would never be a good time to enter that conversation, and its repercussions. Mamma Pepper was right, there would be a time in the wake of the ache they felt, but there was so much more waiting. He couldn’t bring himself to do it, he couldn’t look her in the eye with those thoughts swarming through his head.

Some things he could acclimate easily to, others required alternative solutions. Lewis reclined, suspended behind the couch as he worked on the laptop Vivi lent him. He couldn’t work the touch pad, but there was the Alt key and the small mouse he could scoot across a solid surface; such as the magazine folded over his thigh. He took over the asset review, while Vivi took a break from the break.

Once in a while he glanced over at Mystery, curled up into the couch arm. Though the dog pretended he was deep asleep, he knew better. A good indicator was make a sound, and observe if Mystery reacted. If the ear twitched or the nose perked, Mystery was napping; however, if Mystery reacted naught at all, this was clear indicator that the hound was b/s/ing.

Vivi murmured in her sleep and rolled over, promptly sliding all the way off the couch and thudded on the floor. “Ow….”

Lewis peered over as he descended, feet catching the floor while he shut the laptop and set it on the cushions. “Ooh. You okay?” More surefire proof that Mystery was b/s/ing – he didn’t react at all to that earthquake.

“Uh-huh.” Vivi eased up, hand capped to her messy hair. She picked up the mechanics magazine she was reading and set it back onto the coffee table. “Just a concussion. What time is it?” She picked up the phone from the table and leaned it up. “Crud. Did Arthur come by?”

Lewis gawked at her, eyes bright and a little curious. Or stupefied. “If Art came ‘round, I’m sure one of us would have told you. What time is it?” He leaned over the couch to see the phone. “Where is he?” Now with the clear distress in their voices, Mystery popped his head up looking alert and serious.

Vivi climbed back onto the couch and scrolled through the phone log, both calls and messages. “He might’ve gotten tied up with something.”

“I hope he’s not tied up!” The lamp on the worktable flickered on.

Vivi threw an arm toward the desk. “You can power shit when you’re upset, but when you’re a chill cucumber you sap all electric devices within a two-mile radius?!” Lewis chattered, and dropped his face into a palm. Meanwhile, Vivi shoved the phone against her ear. “Voice mail.” She brought the phone down and began typing into it.

Mystery scooted closer, glancing between Vivi to Lewis and really working his eyebrows. There shouldn’t be trouble. Not here.

“It’s late,” Lewis supplied. “Getting late-er.”

With a bark, Mystery dropped off the couch and padded over to the hamster terrarium setup on the floor. He sniffed along the side, staring through the mesh and glassed-in sides. He found Galahand, nestled in a bed of straw and Mystery’s white fur-shed. Mystery plopped down to stare in at the snoozing hamster, his bob tail wagging.

“While Mystery communes with Gally, let’s check downstairs?” Vivi shoved the phone in the backpack and zipped it up. For the time, they didn’t need the laptop. “Maybe he’s catching up on some work with the vehicles, or something.”

Though Lewis doubted it, he nodded. “Where else could he be?”

“I don’t know.” Vivi shoved the door open and hurried down the corridor, and took the steps three or five at a time. Close in pursuit, Lewis barely let his toes touch the ground. They hit the ground level and bolted around the wall, into the work zone. Some of the light were still on, she noted. “Arthur?”

There wasn’t a sound, all the equipment was cold and abandoned, no life to speak of. The windows revealed no natural light, overpowered by streetlamps and other illumination from the road. A pin drop would be a thunderclap, Vivi’s soft footfalls reverberated. She could hear her own heartbeat, or… was that Lewis?

“No one’s here,” Lewis rattled.

A sound now. The faint tappy-tap of dog toes, and a low ruff.

Vivi gave a whistle. “I don’t think Uncle Lance would leave, not without a ride.”

Lewis wheezed. “He and Arthur have that in common.” He gave chase when Vivi took off, shooting around a set of cars and toward the main office. A cacophony of barks burst out, followed by a white blur darting in front of Vivi.

“Mystery!”

A wail and rebounding crash followed. Both Vivi and Lewis winced, that sounded painful. “Was Uncle Lance asleep?” Lewis speculated, with a creak.

“He’s here at least, we can—” Mystery bounced up on his rear legs and planted his paws on Vivi’s front, whining and forcefully pushing her. “Shit-shit! Lew!” Lewis did a full one-eighty and dove under the nearest vehicle, a classy little compact car. Vivi glared, absolutely livid. “The one time he doesn’t disappear in a gush of fire. What the hell?”

A loud yawn announced Uncle Lance. “What the ‘ell all this racket? Viv-vi? What’re yu still doin’ ‘ere?” He blinked hard and scratched at his scalp.

Vivi pushed Mystery back, crisis averted. She patted the pup on his head. “I could ask you the same.” Uncle Lance yawned again. “You haven’t seen Arthur, have you?”

“Hmm?” Uncle Lance checked his arm. “Er, what time is it?” He didn’t have a watch.

Vivi sighed. “Late. We were supposed to meet with Arthur at six, or… seven. It’s way past that.” Mystery gave a yap.

“That explains why I’m not home in bed.” Uncle Lance rubbed at his eyes. “You tried calling? Tried smoke signals?”

“I’m only getting his voice mail, and he hasn’t responded to messages.” She slid off the backpack and slipped it open. “It’s not weird he’d ditch like this, but I wanna make sure he’s all right.”

Uncle Lance nodded. “I read ya. Mmm… can’t do much but look fer ‘im. Lemme check mah messages. Why yu think he might ditch?”

Vivi shrugged and followed Lance over to the office. “I have no idea why he wanted to meet up. We’re not due for assignments, not with the van in the shop.” She glanced back and managed to spy the embers eyes – just the eyes – gazing out from beneath the dark shadow of the car. Really Lew?

There were no messages on the company line. Vivi suggested Uncle Lance check his personal cell, but she wound up doing that for him since she was must faster and they were in a hurry. Lance went ahead and checked his emails, as well, out of desperation. With each cold trail and no fresh leads, the unease crept into Lance’s eyes.

“He can’t be in any trouble,” Lance uttered, to himself.

Once again, Vivi checked her phone. “Where all was he going today? He mentioned errands?”

Uncle Lance nodded, and sank into his large chair. “I’ll give’y a list. Them places are closed, no one will be in.” Nonetheless, he got on the computer and began going through the inventory. He moved names to a blank document from the spreadsheet.

Vivi leaned down and rubbed Mystery’s face, causing his collar to jingle. “We could pick up a trail. Couldn’t you Mystery? You wanna find Arthur.”

Mystery barked, and raised a paw to fix the glasses upon his snout. Arthur was as good as found with me on the case.

Uncle Lance moved his eyes off the hound, and set them back on Vivi. “You do this whole investiga-shun work professionally, that’s enough for me tu trust yu. But he’s usually with ya, helpin’. Is there somethin’ I should do?”

When the page printed out fully, Mystery snatched it from the printer and darted out the door. He gave a stifled yip. Vivi watched him go.

“If anything comes up, I’ll call.” She looked back at Uncle Lance and gave him a smile. “And when we find him, I’ll give you a call. We won’t rest until we figure out what happened, promise.” Before she could step out of the office, Lance called her back.

“Eh. How do ah say this?” Lance was standing, all his imposing height. He wasn’t looking at her, but focused on the desk beneath his palms. And the pictures, framed and stationed there. “This… has been tough on him. I know… you don’t recall much, I gather’n that. But, you’n been there, when I couldn’t. You didn’t remember, but somehow, you’r there fer im’ and—” He stopped when Vivi leaned over, to peer up into his face.

“I know. I know.” She backed up. “We’ll bring him back. We’ll find him.” She stepped backawards out of the door. There was an unsaid promise in that admission, but it was hard to make promises these days. No matter what, Arthur would be found. They could do that. They always found him.

At the entrance, Mystery was waiting within the open doorway. His bob tail waggled upon Vivi’s approach; he was ready to work. The only indication of Lewis’ presence was a faded outline of a skull and a darker than normal shadow, suspended on the sidewalk near her bike. In the murky shroud, a pair of fuchsia lights glimmered, awaiting her arrival.

In the span of two hours, Vivi had received nine calls from Uncle Lance rooting for updates on the whereabouts of his boy. As the minutes ticked away and the crew’s options dwindled with each impasse, the calls became more frequent. Until at last, her phone ran out of power completely. The call that would have gone through was missed, since she was piggybacking on Lewis as he skied through the back bay of a delivery access for a techy store; one of many Arthur would visit seeking rando bits to test in equipment. It was far out of their home town, anything could have happened between the call earlier that day and now.

Ahead of Lewis galloped Mystery, the dogs snout low and his ears aimed like twin dishes. As they rounded to the front of the abandoned parking lot, Mystery’s pace subsided and he began turning that snout toward the air sniffing.

Lewis glided on colorful bursts of flames, the embers sputtered out at his heels as he made a little semi-circle and coasted back around while the hound patrolled. He dropped out of the buoyant float and walked a few feet.

Mystery snorted and grumbled. With a yap, he trotted over to the entrance and patrolled one way then the other.

“He was here,” Vivi posed. When Lewis knelt, she dropped off his back and pulled the backpack off her shoulders. Mystery moved away from the doors and looked up at Vivi. He whined, ears drawn back. “And where did he go?”

Mystery brushed between Vivi and Lewis, going straight through the parking zone until he reached one guideline pattern specifically. The dog waltzed around the spot, then, turned his eyes back to Vivi. Here and left.

“Where’d he wind up, is my question,” Lewis huffed. “Still no messages?”

Vivi tugged the phone from her backpack and grimaced. “Not that it’d do us any good….” This time, Lewis was the one frustrated.

“Are you serious?!”

Vivi slung the pack on her back. “Let’s focus on finding him, first. If we find a payphone, we— I’ll give Uncle Lance a call, let him know the phone went caput. Not much else we can do, aside from figure out what happened.” Lewis pressed his hands over his face, and it sounded like he was counting. “Try not to get too upset.”

Lewis groaned. “Trying.” He lowered his hands. “Where else haven’t we checked?”

Vivi pulled the folded sheet from the backpacks side pocket and checked it. Squinting, she turned her sight towards the dully glinting letters beneath the lost moon. It was late, the natural light abandoned them entirely. “This was it. We’ve exhausted our leads.” She refolded the page and stuck it back into the pocket, beside the spare flashlight.

“Nothing, Mystery?” she called. “Are you sure?”

Mystery turned his gaze back to Vivi and tilted his head, one ear sprouted high. His home?

“Without Uncle Lance?” Vivi posed. A bark was Mystery’s reply. “It is Arthur, I guess.” To Lewis, she asked, “You remember where Arthur lives?”

Lewis leaned down. He let Vivi climb on and get a grip of his neck, before standing. “No, not… really.” Vivi pointed.

“Misty’s got you covered.”

Mystery gave a bark and spun away, gaining speed as he charged out of the parking zone and onto the sidewalk. Kicking up flames, Lewis gave heated pursuit.

“And where should I go, if he’s not at his house?” Lewis called. “I don’t think he’ll be there.”

“We have a ways to go, I’ll think of something,” Vivi asserted. “Anywhere else Arthur might go? Can you think of a place?”

“Uh….”

Vivi barely caught herself on the stiff collar when Lewis faltered. He didn’t fall, but his physicality sputtered. “Do you have any ideas?”

“No. Well, we can scout around.” Privately, Lewis chided himself. Arthur wouldn’t go there, of all places. He wouldn’t dare. Though, he couldn’t be certain. “How you holdin’ up?”

Vivi adjusted herself, and tucked her face behind Lewis’ neck. The gale whipping through and around them was wicked cold, almost unbearable. He was moving fast, giving Mystery a good run. “The nap earlier helped.”

The roads and sidewalks zipped by, business districts vanished as they cut through a small neighborhood. Then, through a school yard and sprawling field. Mystery didn’t stop at the chain-link fence, he leapt up and clambered over the top of the fence. In a swoop, Lewis followed. The only time either dithered in the swift movement was to take on an incognito pace, but once the late-night voyager was out of views, off they were once again. Their advantage was that they didn’t stick to the main roads, the group exploited any and all shortcuts.

In truth, Vivi wasn’t sure what to do if Arthur was not at his own home. Leaving Uncle Lance stranded at the shop? That wasn’t like him. Something had to have happened, but so far they had no guide nor inclination to what might have happened, or who could have done it. This unfamiliar ambiguity frightened Vivi. Most of all it bothered her that Arthur wanted to meet with them, and then promptly vanished.

They were shooting through another sequence of business district, quiet and empty. At the entrance to a small organic food store stood a row of pay phones. Vivi spied them immediately and jabbed an arm out.

“There! Phone!”

Lewis skipped on his heels and came to a near complete stop, but Vivi already leapt off his back and charged away. “Okay, uh… Mystery!”

“We’ll catch up later!” On her way jogging to the storefront, she caught a glance back. “Where is he going? Wait, Lew! Figure out where he’s going!”

Lewis ceased following her and flung his arms down at his sides. “What about you?”

The door to the phone booth required a firm kick, before she could heave the door aside enough to squeeze in. “I’m not going anywhere! Make sure he doesn’t raid a Clucky Truck!” With a growl, Lewis zipped off. Leaving Vivi to go through the backpack, and realize she had no spare change for the coin slot.

“Damnit!” She punched the phones face. A click chirped, and a coin deposited into the return slot. Vivi perked. “Oh, thanks.” She took the coin and fitted it into the pay slot, and began hammering at the dial.

Gnarled tree branches bent and wove across the starlit sky, through the infinite reach of black the stars glittered within perpetually. It wasn’t the same abundance of sparkling glitter he’d see on the abandoned roads and forgotten zones, exiled out in the desolate locations where civilization waned. All the same, it was peaceful; it was familiar to the sensation of memories and a place in history now beyond his grasp. The old clock running time couldn’t be dissuaded, couldn’t be negotiated with, and there came a sense of loss with moving beyond this point on the line. Reluctant as he was to move onward and never look back, distance himself metaphorically from a place that haunted his darkest dreams.

Moving on was hard. Letting go, harder still. Somehow, he managed to break that old clock and since then, nothing had been right.

Relearn. He had to relearn a lot of things.

The truck sat parked in a vacant field a distance out from some business suites and some restaurant chains, some of the lights in the offices were left on but the illumination was not enough to bleed into the vacant expanse of the night sky. Tall trees grew in small patches along and through the lot, enough that it hid the immobile truck from daily going-ons. He needed time to stop, to get a grip of the minutes.

Arthur lay on the back of the truck roof, a hull full of spare parts, full of thoughts. A collection of pieces and materials meant to rebuild new methods for living, a crude connector in the broken line of time. The brisk air gnawed at his arm, but he didn’t have a care. He’d been colder before.

He sat up and pressed his hands over his face, a long sigh deflated his lungs. The cool pressure from his false arm distinct. He didn’t feel ready with a return and reuniting with the Pepper Paradiso, he made the offer, but he really wasn’t up to it. Sure, he could call and let Mamma Pepper know, he knew she’d understand – insisted he could. But he had to do something, he couldn’t just… not. But the kids, Lewis’ little sisters. Regardless what Mamma said, he didn’t want to force that on them. He couldn’t blame them, who would? It was— Their big brother was gone. Or… was formerly gone, but didn’t go away completely. Lewis. He wasn’t the same, and Arthur, he wasn’t the same either, to be blunt. If only….

If only he hadn’t felt— If only he wasn’t, or hadn’t. He could have— It should have been different! It wasn’t his fault! Why didn’t they listen!?

The crack of his fist striking the truck roof crackled through the empty night. Following its brutal intensity came the onslaught of silence. This awful, accusing silence. Not even the wind stirred. Arthur leaned a little to the side and fought to wrestle his heartrate under control, calm his nerves. He needed some gum, but he was trying to cut back. He needed to wean off that. It wouldn’t help, he kept reminding himself that.

“Arthur?”

With a jolt, he gawked off the side of the truck and at the figure barely discernable from the heavy cloak night provided. All but for the eyes, burning bright and brimming with a bafflement Arthur was not accustomed to.

“You uhh…” the figure glided closer, like an apparition from a dream that refused to end. “You okay there?” Lewis barely had a chance to throw his arms up, but he’s jarred and couldn’t brace for Arthur colliding into him. He managed to remain upright, only because Arthur’s lower half hadn’t flopped off the vehicle roof. “Burn señor! Arthur! What—?”

It was so soft and faint, he almost didn’t pick it up. Even right beside his chin, as Arthur mumbled.

“I didn’t… I-I couldn’t, Lew. I fucked up. I can’t fix this, I tried. Believe me, I tried. I tried so fucking hard. It’s just, it’s all beyond me. I can’t….”

Lewis meant to put his hands on Arthur’s shoulders, but instead he wrapped his arms around the other. “De qué estás hablando? Esta… what happened? What’d you break?” Arthur couldn’t get out another word, but he persisted to roll through the mantra, rephrasing his assertion through the wheezing, shuddering breaths. It was alarming. He tried to glance around searching for Mystery, but the strange hound had gone scarce.

“Art, c’mon.” Lewis moved backwards, hauling Arthur down from the truck. It wasn’t the most proactive strategy, given that Arthur had a deadlock grip on his form and Lewis was forced to lean over or have him hang. Once more he checked his surroundings, but there was no aid to find. “I don’t get wh—”

“You! I broke you,” he finally croaked. “I broke your family, I broke our friendship!” He tightened his grip and whimpered. “I did it… and I can’t—” He snatched up a breath and eased through breathing, the toll of speaking dragging him away from intelligible words. “I thought it would get better, but it doesn’t. I can’t… I can’t fix this. There’s no way. No way….” He shuddered and quieted, barely managing to stifle a hiccup as he choked back words. Regret. Intent.

“Artie, you—” Lewis cut himself off and shut his eyes, retreating on his next approach and words. He couldn’t say those things. Never. The mansion revisited his thoughts. The sanctuary brought forth to seclude away, sleep and dream and envision where his path could go. The dead ends formed, repeating hallways and stairways, never ending. The fire burned through the core of his soul, his resentment and ire for the betrayal which left him stranded. Tore him from a world he took for granted, and from the people who made up his entire world. Where nothing else mattered, except being a part of their lives – his friends, family, and the future boundless.

Not until that was all robbed from him.

“Art,” he began. “It doesn’t matter, okay?” He chattered to himself, losing substance and focus. The trees and the moon reminded him of that place, the woodland he made his last adventure in as one living Lewis Pepper. “Some things are meant to be broken.” Arthur groaned against his collar. “Some things aren’t meant to be fixed. You’re living proof of that.” He sighed, and it sounded wispy like a breeze. The air held eerily still, the world might’ve ground to a halt. “It… doesn’t mean they’re no longer good. Estas escuchando?”

A noise from the sideline snagged his attention, and Lewis shifted enough to spy the blue wisp zipping in. The force Vivi collided at them with did surprise him, yet, not as much as the desperate embrace she captured them both within. Arthur cringed against his suit front, smothering a fresh round of tears.

“How many ways, Artie?” Vivi whispered. “How many ways can we put you back together? How many different shapes can you take? How many times?” Arthur’s knees buckled, but Vivi held them both to her fullest intent. “We’ll never stop, you hear me? No matter what. There’s so many ways, infinite possibilities – we’ll learn new methods, never stopping, until we know what works for you.”

Lewis couldn’t remain upright. It wasn’t as if they were heavy, but he couldn’t keep aloft. He wanted to stay with them. They were so heavy and grounding, he had to drop to his knees. He loosened one arm at his side and looped it around Vivi, his other tightened around Arthur’s shoulders. “You might not be okay,” Lewis hummed, “but we’ll be here. Right here.”

“Lew. I did this. You can’t—”

“It wasn’t your fault,” Vivi reaffirmed. “However many times, we’ll remind you. It was never your fault. It’s nobodies fault. We have to get past that.”

Arthur sniffled, but it sounded as if his ragged breathing was calming. “I don’t want to.”

“I know,” Lewis rumbled. Black stains soaked into the puffy vest Arthur wore. “But, we’ll be here to find you at your lowest. You’ll have that, whether you like it or not.”

A stiff shudder rolled through Arthur, and for a brief spell he was calm. “I’d like that, I think.”

“We have you, Artie,” Vivi soothed. “We got you.”

A distance from the group, Mystery lounged up high in the branch of one tree with his chin resting on his crossed front paws. Not often he thought of that day, as they did, but he did wonder. Of all the scenarios and pathways that could have been ventured upon, was this really the best? There was no way of knowing for certain, unless time kept it’s steady and earnest pace.

The three clung to each other, as if the earth around them would crumble apart and no sanctuary existed, except for what their embrace could muster. Colors began to prick the edges of the horizon, drawing forth purples and warm blue tones. Within short time dawn would immerse the world and banish away the ruthless night. The sun would rise into the sky, and the trio would collect themselves with intent to face a new day. Challenges awaited, but time stalled for no one.

#msa #mystery skulls fanfic #fanfic #fanfiction #msa fanfic #msa fanfiction #mystery skulls fanfiction #mamma pepper #mystery #arthur #lewis #vivi #uncle lance #mamma pepper is hard to write i dont know her personality or her character #meanwhile arthur tries his very best #he is a good boy

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nadziejastar · 4 years

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In the best way you can describe it, how do you KH3 could have been better? (maybe more in terms of story-telling that seems to be KH3's weakest point).

The biggest problem was that all the characters felt like emotionally hollowed out husks of their former selves. KH2 was a lot slower paced, and took the time to devote to its characters. KH3 took NO time to actually slow down. If it did, there would have been another 3 hours of cutscenes, easily. In a series that’s very character and relationship driven, the lack of character and relationship development had a very detrimental effect. None of the characters had much of an inner journey. It felt like there was outside pressure to cut down on the amount of story and only focus on the absolute bare minimum to move things forward.

The theme of KH3 was “Face My Fears”. Each character needed a moment in the spotlight to face their fear and resolve their inner conflict. This problem wouldn’t exist if KH3 actually focused on what it was supposed to: the power of waking. Diving into someone’s heart and getting really intimate with them and healing their pain. Each character should have gotten to use the power of waking and been playable.

Riku

“You’re afraid of the dark! You’re so scared of the darkness inside yourself, you don’t even know what to do!”

The Replica saw what was in his heart as if he could read it like a book. This fear of the darkness inside him—his terror. The Replica was a copy of Riku, body and mind, and he knew everything. But the Replica didn’t know what it was to feel fear. He didn’t need to. He had no self of his own—so he just had to become Riku.

Riku was swallowed up by the Demon Tide and knocked out in the beginning. That should have been the opportunity for Mickey to dive into his heart to wake him up. I’m pretty sure that there was originally supposed to be a boss fight against Riku’s shadow with Mickey playable. When the boss is defeated, it clears up the stained glass station of awakening, freeing Riku’s heart. Riku’s inner development gets focused on. He faces his fears, reintegrates his shadow, wakes up, his gazing eye Keyblade is broken–meaning he’s free from Xehanort following him everywhere now. He’s conquered his inner darkness. Much longer segment of character development focusing on his emotions and bond with Mickey.

Mickey & Aqua

Shadow Aqua: Do you have any idea how lonely it is here? How frightening it is to have no one.

As a Disney character Mickey didn’t get a shadow self. His character arc concludes dealing with Aqua’s shadow. Her fear was being trapped in the darkness alone. Before this battle, the Demon Tide swallowed Mickey up, knocking him unconscious. I think Riku was supposed to dive into his heart and the Dark Aqua boss was part of Mickey’s nightmare. Mickey’s fear was that what happened to Aqua was all his fault. So, Riku is playable in this section. Then Sora dives in the water and enters the real Aqua’s heart. Then in the parallel dimensions, Sora and Riku defeat Shadow Aqua together. Riku and Sora use the combined attack that they used in KH3D.

Carl Jung, on the symbolism of water. Water is the commonest symbol for the unconscious. The lake in the valley is the unconscious, which lies, as it were, underneath consciousness, so that it is often referred to as the “subconscious,” usually with the pejorative connotation of an inferior consciousness.

The part where Sora dives in the water to save Aqua was completely glossed over. They showed him picking up Eraqus’s Keyblade that washed up on shore. And it was meant to be a clue. It was like Kairi’s letter bottle. It washed up on shore in the dark realm. Sora realizes that the realms are connected by the water. Aqua fell in the water and lost her Keyblade. So he jumps in after her.

Of course it’s not gonna be that easy to just dive in there and pull her out, though. If that were the case, why didn’t Riku or Mickey just do it? Their connection wasn’t strong enough to locate her in the deep abyss. Sora wasn’t close to her either, but he had Ven’s heart inside of him.

So, when Sora dives into the water, that should be important. It could have been the time when he awakens all the subconscious memories sleeping in his heart. The ones that were talked about in Re:coded and KH3D. Roxas, Xion, Namine, Ventus. Then, with the unconscious memories brought to the surface, all the characters can be revived who SHOULDN’T return physically.

Xion

“How many days has it been since you got here?” he asked Kairi, squinting his eyes as he watched the sunset. Their training had only just begun.

“Why do you keep asking, Lea? You’ve said that every day.”

“Oh, sorry.”

“And you keep apologizing, too.”

“It’s just…I feel like there’s something I need to remember.”

“Master Merlin said time doesn’t really exist here. Still, maybe it’s a good idea to keep track of the days. Today would be the seventh. But you got here before me, so—”

THIS is when Xion’s story should be resolved. In the novel, Lea and Kairi’s training was a reference to 358/2 Days. They started counting on Day 7. Lea spends all his time with Kairi feeling like he forgot something important and sees Xion’s face in the sunset. Then they watch the sunset together at the end. There should have been some payoff to that.

I'll never forget today's sunset. Even if Roxas and Axel do, I won't forget.

On the 255th day of their training, it’s almost time for them to finish. Show Lea and Kairi remembering Xion when they watch the sunset. Show Kairi remembering the promise she made to never forget on Day 352 “Sunset”. Xion was shoehorned into the Keyblade Graveyard, and had no meaningful dialogue. It’s more natural and emotional if they remembered her while watching the sunset. Plus it gives them both time to actually talk about their feelings. This gives more depth to the Axel/Xion and Kairi/Lea relationship.

Ansem & Twilight Town Kids

Hayner: We can’t be together forever… so we’d better make the time we do have something to remember.

The other character who would be remembered after Sora’s dive is Roxas. There should have been MUCH more closure given to Hayner, Pence, and Olette’s relationship with Roxas from KH2′s prologue. This whole scene wasn’t dedicated to Roxas or his relationships. It was just used as an excuse to insert Subject X into the plot. Get rid of Subject X and only focus on Ansem the Wise’s remorse and Roxas’s bond with his friends.

Once the kids fully remember Roxas, they should have gone to the Data Twilight Town to look for him. There they would find Ansem the Wise. All he wants is to atone to Roxas. Then they can have meaningful dialogue about Roxas. Ansem was the one who prevented them going to the beach. Ansem heard Roxas say their names in his desperation during the Struggle. This scene should have been used to give closure to Hayner’s group, Roxas’s pain during his summer vacation, and also Ansem the Wise.

Then they lead him back to the real world. In an earlier scene, Ienzo set up sharing between the two computer networks. When Ansem the Wise returned in Radiant Garden, it looked like he came out of the Datascape transporter, which I don’t think was a coincidence. It was probably originally storyboarded that way and they just left it like that. Then he meets his apprentices and they can reconcile.

Ventus

Roxas: It’s scary to think I could lose you guys.

Axel: Scary? Scary’s a feeling, man.

Roxas: Yeah, I know I can’t feel, but… It’s still a scary thought.

Sora still seemed to have no clue how to use the power of waking at this point. Aqua should have used it on Ventus in the restored Land of Departure. Then as she’s delving into his heart, that is the opportunity where you confront all of Ven’s trauma, both as a human and as a Nobody. You resolve both Ven and Roxas’s inner pain at the same time.

What was Ven/Roxas so afraid of? Losing his friends. And if you accept that Ventus was Roxas, it happened to him several times. Ven’s heart first collapsed and he forgot everything. Then he met Terra and Aqua. Then Eraqus told him he shouldn’t exist and he wound up going to sleep. Then when he woke up as Roxas, he made friends with Xion and Axel. He forgot them and woke up in the data Twilight Town. Then he’s told by Namine that he was never supposed to exist and he has to disappear for Sora to come back.

Aqua should have had the Vanitas boss fight inside of Ven’s heart. He’s Ven’s shadow. Then in real world, the real Vanitas shows up and Ven would save Aqua from him while she’s asleep.

Axel: Simply amazing, Roxas.

Roxas: Axel.

Axel: You really do remember me this time? I'm SO FLATTERED. But you're too late!!

I think the Respite scenes were some of the only good character moments. Aqua and Ven watching the stars and Sora and Kairi sharing a paopu were both good. But there was absolutely no good reason for Saix to show up on the clock tower when hes supposed to be fully Norted at that point. Instead, Lea should have gone there with Ventus so they could resolve his relationship with Roxas, which ended on a pretty poor note with Axel trying to kill him.

It’s funny to me in KH3 that Lea was expecting Ventus to remember him and continue the relationship they had as Roxas and Axel. He just assumed that Roxas was Ventus, and that Ventus would have all of Roxas’s memories (which I always assumed, too). It really shows that he never saw them as different. His friendship with Ven felt the same to him as his friendship with Roxas. They were interchangeable to him. And that’s how it should have been.

If Ven and Lea went to the clock tower, they could talk about their feelings, their best friends Terra and Isa, and finally get to know each other. Show Lea apologize to Ventus for trying to eliminate him in KH2 and have them make amends. Roxas returns in the Keyblade Graveyard, but he felt like an empty husk shoehorned in for fanservice. His relationship with Axel got no closure. They didn’t talk about anything. Just BOOM! They’re instant best friends again.

The Promise with Terra

A promise Riku made with Terra during his boyhood days regarding the succession of the Keyblade. Terra had promised that if Riku were able to reach the place where he was, he would teach him how to protect the world and those he cared about.

Why is Riku talking with his Replica in this scene? Give him closure to the promise he made with Terra. Show him remembering his childhood. Develop his feelings about Terra.

Eraqus: Terra, you mustn’t be afraid of losing. Fear leads to obsession with power, and obsession beckons the darkness.

Ventus was supposed to face Vanitas in the Keyblade Graveyard. Aqua was meant to face Terranort. Aqua defeats him with the help of the Lingering Will. “I will set this right”. Then Ven should have used the power of waking on Terra after Aqua defeated him in the physical world.

Then after diving inside his heart, Ven would be playable and have a boss fight against Terra’s inner shadow. Something interesting during Terra’s boss fight: he said “You no power over me.” Why is he so obsessed with power? Because his greatest fear was losing. He’s afraid of disappointing others. And he sought power as his way of coping. He needed to deal with all those feelings before he woke up. KH3 spent no time actually developing the characters’ feelings. They all come back or get redeemed so easily.

I thought that I didn’t need you with me anymore. That’s why I sacrificed myself to that man. If you didn’t need me, then I no longer held meaning.

Day 150 is called “Fear”. This is the day Saix started to become nasty with Xion. Isa’s fear was that Lea wouldn’t need him anymore and he was taking it out on Xion. I hate how Roxas and Xion took ALL the spotlight for this fight, even in ReMind. They felt like Gary Stu and Mary Sue.

Once Kairi and Lea defeated Saix in real life, Lea should have dove into his heart. Then you should have gotten to play as Lea as he defeats Isa’s inner shadow and then this whole conversation about how he lost his purpose should have taken place. Lea would helped him confront his fear of abandonment, then he’d wake up. NO time was devoted to Saix’s feelings. He was just instantly redeemed.

Have Kairi be playable when she saves Sora when he’s fragmented. She’s the one who collects his pieces and prevents him from fading away in the Final World. Give her a boss fight, too. We shouldn’t have had to wait for Re:Mind to play as her.

Kairi: You know, I was a little afraid at first, but now I’m ready. No matter where I go or what I see, I know I can always come back here. Right?

Sora: Yeah, of course!

Kairi: That’s good. Sora, don’t ever change.

Then later, Kairi’s heart is the only one Sora doesn’t save from the Lich. So he has to dive into her heart, even though he doesn’t really know how to use the power of waking. Then he has to confront her shadow, Namine. Have Sora finally thank her. Have Kairi face her fears so she can fully merge with Namine once and for all. Then Kairi rescues Sora and they go back to the real world.

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howtotrainyouragents · 4 years

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Agent H’s AOS Rewatch

S2E10 “What They Become”

I wrote this out during the actual rewatch week, but I didn’t realize I never posted it! Boy, did this get long.

-I had to do a liveblog of this episode because it’s one of my favorites of the season, and we get SKYE’S TRANSFORMATION!

-Okay, so @the fandom who were around back then: at what point did people guess they were doing a terrigenesis/Inhumans storyline? Because I only learned that’s what they were doing via the internet frenzy after the episode was over

Ward, May, Coulson, and HYDRA

-MAY’S. EPIC. FLYING. FUDGE YYYYEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHH. This is so fucking brilliant of her, dead-dropping the plane and then cloaking.

-”I would put two of these (bullets) in his heads”. Plus, Coulson always looking at the good side: “you saved six agents”. I didn’t do a liveblog of 2x09, but that conversation with Bobbi about acceptable casualties is SO IMPORTANT and vital to who Coulson is and the show overall and you know that’s the moment Bobbi truly supported Coulson.

-Good callback: Before Coulson freaked out that Skye was taken. Now he’s confident that she’ll be able to handle herself until they can get in there.

-”Hand me your side arm, let’s find out”-Skye

-Is Ward’s personality shift (though still a psychopath) this first half of the season because he’s lost without Garrett or because he believes he can be redeemed through helping Skye? Both?

-Yass queen, pick up the diviner

- I loved seeing the bad guys maneuvering around each other in Season 2a, and all of that coming to a head this episode. But I don’t know why Ward and Skye and all attacked and then they just stopped. I think they could have taken the HYDRA goons easily

-“Never turn your back on the enemy.” You know I’m glad Skye shot Ward too. It’s closure on his belief that she can redeem him that’s been carrying him through these last ten episodes.

-I never realized that Agent 33′s voice was distorted

-HYDRA, SHIELD, and the aos writers treated Kara so badly, and I am yelling shame and ringing the bell at all of them.

Hunter and Bobbi

-“If he really is dead, the number of people I trust on this planet, just plummeted.” The Huntingbird hug is so beautiful! How strong Bobbi pretends to be (“Whenever this is all over, I’m gonna cry for like a week”= so real) and how she lets herself go with Hunter. She’s so surprised by the hug at first, and I love how much taller she is than him. He knows about the flashdrive, but he tries to comfort her anyway and that makes me sad and touched.

-”Diego’s early and he’s wearing a suit.”-Bobbi

-The kiss! Ugh, Huntingbird really does fill all the classic OTP tropes

-”Don’t die out there.” “He likes to hear it.” “Who doesn’t like to hear it??”

-”Join SHIELD, travel to excotic distant people, meet exciting unusal people, and kill them” -Hunter

Fitz, Simmons, Tripp, and the Koenigs

-Bahahaha, the Koenigs, His little thumbs up and Hunter rolling his eyes for his life (Hunter would die in the middle of saying something sarcastic, and I will stake my life on that). Also good reuse of the pod units but this time for good (rather than, you know, bottom of the ocean and dying). Sidenote, did we see the pods anytime before Skye gets shot?

-I love Fitzsimmons working together (finally) in the holding cell. I love how the minute they say they’re not gonna work together anymore, they have to work together. Here, they’re so polite but also they’ve got such a natural rhythm. Simmons seems like she wants to talk about them but he’s like oh no, wasn’t talking about myself! Fitz is both back to himself and also gotta new groove (his recovery is going well!). Simmons being genuinely worried for Mack. FITZ’s LOOK OF LOVE

-I only appreciated it on this rewatch, but the show has good continuity of Fitzsimmons/team vs alien tech/bio. They spend majority of season 1 finding 084s and researching their properties and learning how they interact with human biology. Then second season plays off the events of the first season: they’ve seen how many times alien tech/biology is dangerous and they’ve seen it infect and kill so many people. It makes perfect sense why Simmons and the others would be cautious about this alien stuff (Fitz is the loyal one, remembering that this is their friend they’re talking about it and he’s got (blind) faith when it comes to his friends). Season 2 is like introduction to actual aliens (as opposed to relics/artifacts/Asgardians) and how human Inhumans are. Season 3 builds on that further by exploring the good and bad sides of Inhumans.

-I didn’t do a liveblog of the previous episode, but Fitz’s “If you’re looking for vacation time, bribery will get you nowhere. I’ve tried.” is golden. I like the little character traits they give Fitz like, in addition to being a literal genius and all the trauma he’s faced, he’s just a quietly disgruntled SHIELD employee who just wants vacation time and warmer AC (re: season 4)

-Howling Commando gear!!!!!

-Aww, Tripp flirting with Simmons and Fitz is just like…

-The Koenig cloning jokes, hahaha (Poor Tripp)

-First mention of Theta protocol! Dun dun dunnn

-We don’t know what the alien tech is. But Hazmat suits should do the job. :)

-I remember the Fitz splitting off scene being hilarious. Is it because he’s miffed at the flirting, miffed at Simmons, or just genuinely proving that he can do things now?

-Simmons touching Fitz’s arm. And then him holding her later!!!

Cal and Skye

-Cal and Skye’s meeting! This is an emotional, painful reunion.

-I LOVE the actor who plays Cal, he does fantastic job. Seriously how did they get him and Dichen Lachmann to play her parents?? Well done, casting director

-I love that they make Skye biracial just like how Chloe Bennet is and it’s relevant to her storyline

-So to recap Skye’s backstory. Her mother is taken by Whitehall but is released when he gets captures in the 40s. She’s born to her parents, but Whitehall captures Jiaying again. Cal rescues Jiaying, and they return, but HYDRA had already taken Skye as an 084 (?). SHIELD teams led by Audrey then take care of SKye until she is given to an orphanage. Correct?

-”People liked me. I liked myself.” This line deserves much meta

-Teach you about the stars= Inhumans. I love how that’s a total throwaway innocent line, but it all makes sense once you know.

-Just when Skye has figured out life as a SHIELD spy, her world gets rocked again. But I think this path is a good development because she’s not just a regular SHIELD agent: She was born on the outside; learned to think in unusual ways; she’s bubbly and warm and compassionate when SHIELD agents before were typically taught to be rationale and merciless. She’s born to be a new kind of SHIELD agent as well as the bridge between Inhumans and SHIELD

-The lullaby :(

-”Best Day Ever” -Cal

-I mean the emotional manipulation of “After you change I’m the only one who’ll understand” is bad, but he was right in the sense that they all were afraid of her

-Skye wanting to stop the drill and get the obelisk as a way of making it up to Coulson and because she’s a good SHIELD agent. But, like, she knows that’s what her father wanted, so does she just believe she won’t get caught up in whatever is going on? Does she go because fate is pulling her? Does this show believe in fate?? *thinks about all the future time-travelling shenanigans and gets a headache*

THAT ENDING THO

-The thing with Mack presumed dead freaking broke my heart, but it’s a good fake out to blindside us with Tripp’s death.

-IMO, the obelisk is a good fake out for terrigenesis crystals. Even if I knew about Inhumans stuff before hand, I wouldn’t have put it together through what info they give us on the obelisk in previous episodes

-THE TRANSFORMATION. “”WHAT WE BECOME” AKA THE QUESTION THAT WAS ASKED WAY BACK IN SEASON ONE IS FINALLY GETTING ANSWERED. AAAAAHHHHHHHHHH. The chanting, man. Is it the same one we’ve heard before?

- “I gotta admit I’m just the tiniest bit nervous.” I could write an essay on why I love this line.

-SKYE’S TRANSFORMATION. IT’S SO POWERFUL AND SO HEARTBREAKING. THEY’RE BOTH JUST TRYING TO SAVE EACH OTHER. I’M CRYING.

-I probably just need to rewatch this again, but why didn’t anything happen to Tripp when the terrigenesis first activated but then he gets hurt when he gets hit? Like is it the terrigenesis won’t hurt him, but touching the crystals/obelisk will?

-Ya’ll are gonna hate me for this, but... I get why Tripp had to die. Like, it devastated me and still does and its racist and HE DID NOT DESERVE IT. But from the storyline POV, I see why he was chosen to die. Tripp was incorporated into the story in season 1 to replace Ward. We needed an action guy on the team because half the team is non-combat and we needed someone who was genuinely good to balance out the real Ward. But season 2, everyone’s shifted roles. We have Daisy, Hunter, Bobbi who all fill the action roles, so Tripp’s primary role is no longer necessary. He’s (intentionally?) underdeveloped: he does a variety of things, but he’s not filling any one role nor is he vital in any specific relationship, the way Coulson, May, Fitzsimmons, and Skye are, and he doesn’t contribute to the season’s plot the way Hunter, Bobbi, and Mack do. Plus, it’s a really shitty symbolism of how the show is progressing to darker tones by killing of their sunshine boy.

-Anyway, I cant believe they just end like that for a mid-season finale. Top ten moments of superhero genre, without question. Also, is this the first time we here’s Daisy’s theme song? Because I’ve mentioned before how powerful and sad-sounding it is

-GORDON!!!!!!!

#My grouping has either made this less or more confusing #and I can't tell which #I'm sorry #aos #aos s2 #aos rewatch #aos season 2 rewatch #aos s2 rewatch #may #tripp #coulson #ward #skye #daisy #huntingbird #fitzsimmons #agent h #agent aos rewatch #agent report

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rwby-party · 4 years

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“Thus Kindly I scatter.”

While I’m totally down with the idea of Summer Rose being dead the thought of her being alive too is really interesting. I mean that not like it sounds lol I don’t want her dead, but I feel like “Red Like Roses II” made all of us feel that way and to an extent “Sacrifice” as well with the line ”the moon will sadly watch the roses die.” Her gravestone referencing The Last Rose of Summer also alludes to this.

but also like. The thought of her being alive is like. SO FUCKED UP LIKE

did she get captured somewhere? Is she working for Salem? Is she actually dead? Will we actually ever get an answer?? WTF HAPPENED

(I’d find the idea of her being captured for years not only absurd but kinda boring anyway. It’d be as simple as freeing her and then she’d be back. But, it’s a possibility nonetheless)

I’ve got 3 ideas I’m gonna ramble on here, lol, so bare with me.

1. Summer works for Salem/joined Salem’s team.

The idea of her working for Salem is just like... So heartbreaking. She’s always been portrayed as this loving person. This... warmth in everyone’s hearts. The “best of all of us” as Qrow puts it himself. To see her get coerced to the dark side, working in the shadows, working against Ruby herself, maybe without even realizing it. Oof. OOOF.

I don’t even necessarily disagree with Salem to some extent MYSELF. She was horribly wronged by the Gods, and while she was flawed, did not deserve what she got AT ALL. Her side of the story is just as tragic as Oz’s, and she could easily spin it to where hers seemed MORE tragic than Oz’s. Salem has been portrayed as a master manipulator after all. To have Salem spin her own story and tell it to Summer and have what she’s saying even partially align with what Oz told Summer? Just might’ve been enough to make Summer feel like the bad guy herself and convince her to side with her or at least made her feel her efforts were in vain. Maybe she’s naive and is trusting of what she said because it was convincing enough.

OR, Salem could have told her that she was unkillable. She offered her to even try and kill her to prove it, and she does try, but, after seeing for herself that Salem can’t be killed, she just breaks down. Years of training. Years of fighting for what she thought was a solvable problem just thrown out the window because of something Oz had neglected to mention, and instead of Salem killing her, she thinks to utilize Summer’s skill and offers to let her join her side. So, she joins her because she feels like she can’t stop her anyway. Maybe she even does it out of fear. Obviously she can’t go back to Ruby now, and even if she could, she wouldn’t have wanted to drag her into it anyway. (It’s evident from Red Like Roses II that she loves Ruby a LOT.)

The lyrics from Red Like Roses II just keep popping up in my head with this idea though “Wish I could talk to you if only for a minute, make you understand the reasons why I did it” “But baby please don’t do what I did, I don’t want you to waste your life in vain” “You’re not the only one who needed me, I thought you understood”

Which, originally, it made me think she died, regretted even trying because she may have learned about how Salem is unkillable beforehand on her own, and that the others that needed her were Oz and the ones she was trying to protect.

But also, these could be applied to her joining/teaming up with Salem as well. The “reasons why she did it” could be her explaining why she teamed up with her to Ruby so she at least had some closure. She would’ve felt like she wasted her life in vain because she found out Salem was unbeatable (and she uses coercion or manipulates her to join her side. Maybe Salem even lied about Oz a bit.) Maybe she was on her side for a while before she disappeared, but still worked for Oz for Ruby and Yang’s sake. (maybe even Tai and Qrow’s as well. Maybe just to keep her own image up so she could “die a hero” rather than “Live long enough to become the villain.”) If she was on Salem’s side, she’d obviously would need her to do things as well, so she’d set off on “her own” missions. And when she felt the time was right, finally just took off, not being able to keep up working for both sides anymore. Or just not wanting to side with Oz anymore.

Oof.

OR, a more kinda crazy theory, she was brainwashed in some form or another to join Salem, but that seems way less likely.

2. She ran away herself for similar reasons Raven did.

At least, a speculated reason Raven left.

Summer, with her silver eyes, was obviously very important and was a force to be reckoned with, but, what if that pressure got to her like the pressure of being a maiden got to Raven?

We see the pressure of being the team leader practically killing Ruby right now in Vol 7. The weight of the world is on her shoulders right now. (Funny she’s in Atlas, huh? lol.) Summer would’ve been in a similar situation. Oz would be there to direct her on what to do, but he’d obviously would have to have a lot of faith in her. I’d even argue to say that Summer was one of Oz’s best allies because of her silver eyes. That puts a lot of pressure and responsibility on people.

I mean Oz broke the rules for STRQ like he did for RWBY, and I speculate it’s because of the silver eyes that Summer and Ruby have. Its said that those who had Silver eyes were natural born leaders, but I’d argue that it’s the other way around. Oz, knowing of the Silver eyes’ powers, puts them as leaders for the team and essentially forces them to become good leaders. (Or die trying I suppose.)

What if Summer wasn’t as strong as we thought, or as strong as she came off to everyone? Despite the fact that she clearly loved Ruby, (and by extension Yang) what if she had enough?

What if she just wanted a normal life after a while? She obviously was determined to help at first, but what if it started to wear on here after a while and she wanted to stop. She couldn’t because of her importance and responsibility though. She was basically destined to work against Salem. Even if she did try to stop, Oz would obviously convince her to keep trying to defeat Salem, and maybe deep down she really does still want to help, but the pressure inside of her is just building and building with no outlet or vent.

and then one day, she just had enough. Even though she loves Tai and Ruby and Yang, she just can’t take the pressure anymore, and sets off on “her own mission,” leaving her family behind to be in solitude, knowing they wouldn’t want to come with her if she offered/asked them to leave with her. Or maybe she did ask them? Imagine the angst of her asking Tai if they can move like far away and he just being so confused, but catches onto it years after she’s gone. I’ve always felt like Tai wanted the same thing I’m speculating Summer to want here, a normal life with the kids, and he probably fought for it after losing both Raven and Summer. We can assume he knows about the Silver eyes, since Summer was his team mate and the rest of Team RWBY knows as well, and maybe didn’t want Ruby to become a Huntress and definitely didn’t want Qrow to take her on any missions because of it. Maybe he feels like that’s what got Summer killed/to go MIA.

The same heartache pops in my head as in the first theory though either way. She’d be kinda cowardly if that were the case (but still way different than Raven.) We’ve been shown nothing but good about Summer (With the exception that she’s a brat but I mean it’s kinda played as a joke.) She’s portrayed as the loving mother, and to have her abandon her kids and family just doesn’t seem right, but we could’ve been wrong about it. That’s just how everyone remember’s Summer. We never knew what was going on her head, after all. At least not yet.

but, in that case though, why not just run off to where Raven was to at least have an ally or someone who understands? I guess she wouldn’t know where she’s at, but Qrow told Yang where she was, so he would’ve presumably knew where she was back then too. (Rosebird Writers GET ON THIS NOW if you haven’t already cuz I”m sure I’m not the first person to think of something like this. Imagine bandit!Summer LOL.)

3. Summer had a Similar fate to Maria.

(Suicide and gore TW)

What if Summer got her eyes gouged out too? With Maria’s backstory, it was obvious that Silver eyed huntresses/huntsmen were being targeted, presumably by Salem. Summer would be no different. But what if she couldn’t have found her bearings after having her eyes cut like Maria did? What if she couldn’t fight off whoever did it to her and couldn’t survive the fight?

Her mission was more than likely far away from home (and maybe even from civilization) so its probably that couldn’t find her way back home or to civilization even if she survived the fight. Dying alone to starvation or a stray grimm. Or, maybe she did survive and was able to get somewhere afterwards, but maybe didn’t have access to the eye tech Maria did. What if she did the same thing Maria did? Go into hiding basically in shame. Feeling like she wasn’t helpful anymore and wanting to hide from the world.

Maybe it even broke her mentally.

Maybe she couldn’t recover emotionally from the damage even if she had physically, and took her own life afterwards.

“ So soon may I follow, When friendships decay, And from Love's shining circle The gems drop away. When true hearts lie withered, And fond ones are flown, Oh! who would inhabit This bleak world alone? ”

#rwby 7 #rwby 7 spoilers #rwby spoilers #Summer Rose #rwby #rwby speculation #Suicide tw #I feel like I'm cherrypicking lyrics to fit the theory though. I feel like other parts of the song really fit the ''she died'' thing #Maybe she did! and was ressurected by Salem herself #Also the quote's from The Last Rose of Summer #I just saw a lot of sadness in the way Who would inhabit this bleak world alone? was written and oof #to me it felt similar to how someone who was thinking about suicide would feel about it.

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ellana-ravenwood · 6 years

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“I could break you” - Conner Kent x Batsis!Reader (Erotica)

Well. I recently binge watched (again) Young Justice (the trailer for season 3 hyped me too much), and remembered how much I fucking love Conner Kent. Like if we forget about the Batfam, he’s definitely my favorite DC character (I mean, if we also forget about Constantine I guess). And I...just...had to write something with him. And I also felt like writing smut so...Yup. Hope you’ll like it !

IMPORTANT WARNING : THIS IS EROTICA ! THIS IS NOT FOR YOU IF YOU ARE UNDERAGED, I GODDAMN MEAN IT. Like there’s cute and sweet feelings in the mix, but also...smut, so if you’re not 18 or more, or if you’re not comfortable with that sort of things etc etc, this story ain’t for you. I have tons of other very SFW story, for averyone to read, and if you wanna check those out instead, it’s right here, on My masterlist blog : @ella-ravenwood-archives.

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************

Conner was nervous.

He had no reasons to really, it was even quite stupid for him to stress so much about something so dumb and normal.

And yet, here he was, at the kitchen table in his parents’ house (most of the time, he lived at the Young Justice’s headquarters, where he had his own little enclosed apartment, but it was vacation time for everyone so...he came to visit his family), barely touching his breakfast while he usually ate six eggs, countless hashbrowns and so oh so much bacon...

It’s his mom who noticed. Of course it is. His brother and father were to busy eating to see anything else but their plate.

Lois turns to her oldest boy (that she came to consider her son not so long ago to be honest, when Clark finally came to closure with the fact that he had to be there for him...well, “not so long ago”, quite a few years now, nearly ten in fact, Jon was tiny when Conner really came into her life) and says :

-Are you OK Conner ?

And by the way he jumped in the air, she knew she was right. Something was wrong, and she was gonna get it out of him.

Conner turns to his mom, as if she just slapped him, utterly surprised she noticed something (even if it was very obvious) and shakes his head :

-Yes. Yes, I’m fine. I was just...thinking.

Lois gives him that mom look that means : “And you think I’m going to buy that ?”, and doesn’t even have to say more for Conner to continue :

-Ok it’s just...I wanted to ask you something but I don’t know if...I mean...

Lois elbows her husband, who was still too engrossed with his food to realize anything, and gives him that typical wife look that he could translate by : “Pay attention to what is happening, it’s important...also you have a piece of egg on your chin” (yes, it’s a very specific look).

Clark reluctantly tears away from his food (which is made even more difficult as he hears his youngest son chewing loudly his delicious breakfast..) and raises his head, looking simultaneously at his wife then at his boy (who wasn’t really a boy anymore). ...Of course, he has no idea what’s going on, but he acts like he does, imitating his wife’s thoughtful facial expression.

Lois says :

-Conner, you know you can ask us anything right ?

Oh. Ok there’s something the boy wants to ask but he hesitates too. Alright. Dad Clark is up to date. He confirms what his wife just said :

-Yes. Yes of course you can ask us anything.

Conner looks between his mother and father, and their gentle expression calms him a little bit. With a weak voice that is very unlike him, he says :

-It’s about (Y/N).

Lois and Clark exchange a look, and his mom says :

-You can ask us anything, of course. But if it regards certain...Matters, maybe you should talk about it with your friends ? Or with your dad. Just with him.

For a few seconds, Conner is confused.

What is she on about ?

...Until he realizes his mom misunderstood him, and his face turns utterly red.

He can’t believe she thought he wanted to ask something about...that ! As if he was gonna discuss with his parents about what happens with his girlfriend !!

Blushing more and more at the thought, Conner blurts out :

-I’m not gonna ask you anything about...that ! Especially not in front of Jon ! It’s not...I wasn’t...What happens between her and I...Stays between her and I and...wasn’t...I wasn’t...far from it...it’s not...

Happy she misunderstood her son’s nervousness, Lois chuckles a bit as she witnesses her twenty something boy getting all awkward and embarrassed and not knowing what to say.

It’s always a treat for her, when her powerful family members mumble and ramble out of embarrassment, it makes them feel more...humans and flawed.

In that moment, Clark has some terrible flashbacks of teenaged him and this almost exact scene happening with his ma and pa, and therefor, he rushes to his son’s aid and says :

-Ok moving on. Then what do you want to ask ?

Conner takes a few second to regain his countenance, and after mumbling some more about “intimate topics not being a subject of conversation with parents” he shakes his head and finally says :

-I just...Well here we go.

Conner takes a deep breath and quickly says :

-I want to take (Y/N) to a special place, only I...Well...Could I borrow your car please ? I still don’t have one and I want to pick her up for once. She always come to get me...And her dad really doesn’t like when I fly to the mansion, he’s super paranoid about their secret identities - to that comment, Clark raises his eyebrows as if to say “yeah no kidding ?” but lets his son finish - and my motorcycle needs repairs and...I just want to pick her up for once. Trying to be romantic you know ? So...Could I borrow your car ?

There’s a small silence. Lois tries to muffle her “aaawww” because she thinks her son is utterly cute, and meanwhile, Clark answers :

-That’s it ? You want to borrow the car ? Of course you can boy ! Go ahead !

Conner’s face light up, and once against, Lois has to restrain herself from embarrassing him by cooing at him as if he was a baby, but he was genuinely so cute ! She just wanted to pinch his cheek and shower him with kisses.

-Where are you going to take her ?

Clark asks, giving his wife the perfect diversion to go and fetch more eggs and Hashbrown for Jon, and therefor hiding her urge to treat her twenty six year old son like if he was a toddler.

-Oh I wanna take her to one of the field at the outskirt of Smallville, a bit further than grandma’s house. She never saw the Milky Way, living in Gotham and all. So we’re going to go stargazing.

Lois makes a strangle noise from the kitchen (her boy was just so sweet !) and Clark and Conner looks at her, a bit worried.

-You ok mom ?

Conner asks, and she comes back sitting next to him, ruffling his hair.

-Yes I am. You’re just...too sweet. (Y/N) is a lucky girl.

Conner blushes a bit, still having trouble accepting compliments...But his mom’s next few words make him blush even more :

-Though...Stargazing. Just the two of you. Hum...Don’t forget to bring protection.

-AAAAH MOOOOOM !!

Conner exclaims, as red as a tomato. Clark acts as if he didn’t hear anything and goes back to his breakfast and...Jon finally lifts his head up, saying :

-Mom’s right. Bring protection. You never know if an asteroid or something is gonna fall on ya while you stargaze ! Also, are you gonna finish your plate ?

Clark and Lois burst out in laughter in front of a very confused Jon, and a Conner who wanted to crawl into a hole and disappear...Blushing more than ever, he hands his plate to his little brother and leaves the table, as his parents still laugh like crazy.

Snatching their car key, he rushes outside and curses a bit more because why did they have to laugh so much ?!

Damn them.

************

When you received Conner’s text, the least you could say is that you were utterly surprised.

It was very rare, that he would come p...Wait.

Actually, it was the first time he came to pick you up by car.

Usually, you’d meat at Mount Justice, or he would fly to your house (which your dad hated) and then you’d use one of your car (being a Wayne had its perks) to go out.

He used his motorcycle a few time, but again, you having one too, you’d just meet somewhere and then go on a road trip or something...

Yes. It was the first time he actually drove from Metropolis to Wayne Manor to come and pick you up for a date. It was...somewhat exciting.

You didn’t know why, but there was something about him coming to get you that was just...feeling really nice.

You were looking outside from one of the first floor window when you finally heard the bell from the gigantic portal at the entrance of the estate.

You rushed downstairs to go open, but of course Alfred was there first...And so were the rest of your family.

-What are you guys doing ?

Your words startle all of them and they turn around a bit panicked, as if you just caught them redhanded while doing something illegal. Your father speaks first :

-Nothing.

He says, in the most unconvincing tone ever.

You crease your eyebrows at him and say :

-You weren’t expecting to see him before I came down, were you ? Because that would be a ridiculously stupid plan. And I think he heart enough of your threat already.

Jason, who was visiting that day, said a falsely innocent :

-Nooooooo. Of course not. We would NE-VER.

You glare at them a bit, and gesture for them to get away from the door. They obediently go out of your way and you go to open the front door, almost snarling at them.

-Don’t you have better things to do anyway ?

You ask them a bit coldly, while Alfred rolls his eyes and Dick gives you an apologetic look. They look away, as if they were down there by pure coincidence.

You turn towards the outdoor.

A car is slowly going up the path to the entrance door.

It’s a pick-up truck.

Of course it’s a pick-up truck, it’s probably Clark’s.

And it’s...oh my gods.

-Wait...Red and blue...jeez, can you be more obvious ?

Your father, who went out too and was now next to you, rolls his eyes and says :

-Eh it’s Clark we’re talking about, not really the most...You know. His way of hiding his secret identity is by putting some glasses on...

You chuckle a bit, knowing indeed exactly what he means. And you forget to tell him to go back inside and leave you and Conner alone.

The car stops in front of the stairs and Conner gets out of it. He awkwardly straightens himself up and slowly walks up the stairs.

His eyes cross your father’s and he holds his gaze defiantly but then...

then he sees you.

A wide smile spreads across his face :

-Hey you.

He says a bit dumbly (he always felt so light hearted around you).

-Hi.

You answer with the same lovey dovey tone. He continues, giving you his hand :

-Shall we go ?

You’re about to answer when your father (now joined by the rest of your family) says, his voice cold and low, menacing :

-Go where, exactly ?

You slowly turn to him, and oh it’s utterly scary, the look you give him...you’re definitely taking that glare after him. With slow detached words you say, the anger felt in every syllables :

-I am twenty, dad. It’s none of your business where I go.

He looks at you and is about to answer, probably ready to say something stupid that every parents say like : “As long as you live under my roof, you follow my rules” or something (as if that ever happened anyway...after all, you were also taking a lot ater your mother, Catwoman), but this time, you’re the one cutting him off.

You ignore him completely and turn to Conner :

-I’m coming back babe - it’s utterly satisfying, how your dad winces at the pet name you give your boyfriend-, forgot my backpack upstairs.

You start to leave but stop before reaching the door. You turn around and glare some more at your brothers and dad before saying :

-You guys. In. Right now. Except you Dick, you can talk with Conner if you wanna, you’re the only one that isn’t annoying here. The others, inside the house. Actually, follow me, so I’m sure you’re not planning anything sneaky.

They’re about to protest, but oh the look you give them...And so they follow you to your bedroom. With a sigh you tell them :

-I thought we were over the all “watching your every move whenever you’re with your boyfriend” phase ?

Your father looks at you very seriously and says :

-I never agreed to that.

-You did when you said you’d stop trying to break us up. Still think it’s a huge asshole move by the way, not sure I forgave you yet (in this story : “They’re kind of assholes”).

Your dad grumbles an answer and turns to your brothers for support.

But they all look away...It was hard for them to let go, but they had to admit that you were old enough to make your own decisions and all...And Conner was a good guy, they really weren’t being fair.

Besides, they still actually felt bad about trying to break the two of you up (well, maybe Damian and your dad didn’t much).

You roll your eyes and give them each a small slap on the back of their head.

-I know what I’m doing. Trust me.

Jason snorts and says :

-Oh we trust you. Him on the other hand...

There’s a small silence and you sigh once again...Only one solution left for them to let go. You look at them and gather the famous Wayne smirk before saying :

-Jay, I’m twenty. If you think Conner is my first you’re gravely mistaken and I...

Tim interjects :

-WOW ! STOP ! DO NOT WANT TO KNOW THOSE INFOS ABOUT MY SISTER !! RED ALERT ! RED ALLEEERT !!

Your father looks at you, shocked (he had to realize, one day or another, you weren’t a child anymore), Jason froze and seemed to have crashed as if he was a computer, Damian has a murderous look in his eyes but is still too stunned to move....and you smirk as you leave your room.

Yup. Here’s a sure way to shut them up.

They all stand in your room, stunned, as you go back down and yell to them :

-See y’all tomorrow !

After a while, they finally de-froze. And your youngest brother says :

-Did she say she’d come back tomorrow ?!

His voice is full of worries, as he turns to your father who just manages to say :

-...Did she just say “y’all” ?

Oh God. The Kent were starting to influence you too much...

You were already far away when they finally decided to move out of your room, your father sighing nostagically a bit at the sight of a picture of you and him when you were barely four...

************

When you went down the stairs, you found Conner red as a tomato, discussing with Dick. You instantly narrowed your eyes at your brother and said :

-Oh, not you too Dickie ?!

Your oldest brother turned to you and smiled widely, of a joyful and innocent smile :

-What ? Can’t give advices to a friend ? And can’t threaten my sister’s boyfriend to kill him if he hurts her ?

Unsure of wether he’s kidding or not, you just stare at him and slowly takes Conner’s hand. You two get back to the car, and you ask him :

-What did he say to you exactly ?

-Nothing !

Conner’s answer is too rushed for you to believe him...but you don’t feel like getting the truth out of him. Nope. You just want to enjoy your day.

You watch your oldest brother wave at you as you leave, a way too satisfied smile on his face...

************

The drive is oh so pleasant.

You talk about anything and nothing, and sometimes, you just stay silent, enjoying each others’ presence. Listening to your favorite song (getting a bit too turned up when “Africa” by Toto gets on...).

At some point, you decide to lay your head on his shoulder, and put your hand on his thigh and Conner can’t help but smile stupidly. Your mere presence always made him feel so jolly, so relaxed...

Finally, you arrive where he wanted to take you.

It’s a beautiful field in the middle of nowhere, near a forrest. You can hear water a bit further, lost in the trees, probably a river of some sort.

There, you start by having a picnic.

Conner prepared some sandwiches and it’s just so romantic and cute ! And oh it’s been so long since he had the occasion to be romantic and cute with you...

You wipe a bit of mayo that got on the corner of his mouth and...before you know it, your lips are on his, and you’re straddling him while furiously making out, his tongue licking at yours.

It almost turns to more but...as usual he pulls away.

This time, he tells you you two should go to the river, to cool down a little on this hot summer day (both figuratively and literally). He didn’t want you to have a heatstroke or something...

And you get a little bit frustrated.

You know you shouldn’t be. But it’s always like this...You spend more than one night with him, at Mount Justice, but things never went further than passionate making-out and sometimes, oral.

Granted, he was amazing at eating you out and more than once he snuck in your bedroom at the mansion, and devoured you while you were trying to be silent so your family wouldn’t hear you.

And given his reactions, you knew you gave good blowjobs too but...Whenever it was time for more, for the “ultimate act of love” (your mom called it that...you didn’t even know why you picked her expression up, it was so stupid and cheesy) he stopped (even if clearly reluctant to).

And you knew why.

It wasn’t because he didn’t want to be with you like that, but because he was afraid to hurt you. And given the fact that he still couldn’t always control his powers properly...he could very well hurt you.

He almost did a few times when his cock was in your mouth so...he wasn’t about to risk injuring you badly.

But damn it was starting to get frustrating.

Especially even more since you knew he slept with M’gann before (which was fine, you had other boyfriends too, including a certain “Aqualad”).

Somehow, she convinced him he wouldn’t hurt her...or maybe he thought she could take it while you couldn’t ?

She wasn’t a “weak” human after all...

Little did you know that he just never thought that he could hurt her when they were together, while with you...just the thought of hurting you a tiny bit hurt his heart more than anything else.

You weren’t about to force him of course, but you would be lying if you didn’t have a hope that spending the night in a remote place just the two of you wouldn’t arouse a...certain mood.

But for now, all frustration disappears as you playfully throw some water at him, and he picks you up and throw you in the cold ass water...Not very delicately, but hey, you’re not really a delicate lady.

You emerge from the water, hair falling unsexily on your face, laughing your ass off as Conner joins you, and you both start playing as if you were little kids.

And it’s just so nice, to be far away from any responsibilities and vigilante stuffs...It has been a long time since you two had a sort of vacation.

Even longer since you managed to be just the two of you...there was usually always someone around.

So you take advantage of it, enjoying every single seconds in his arms, laughing, talking, yelling out of joy...

************

You don’t think you’ve been that happy ever in your life.

That relaxed.

It’s...so nice, to forget about all your stress, traumas and bad times.

To not worry about your father being reckless, or about one of your brothers getting hurt somehow. About having to arrest your mother because she stole yet another treasure or anything of the like...

You wish you could stay like that forever.

Far from all your troubles. Not that you didn’t love your family, hell, you would die for all of them but...It was so nice to be away from their antics for once.

It made you realize that, more often than note, you’d live for them...and Conner was your only escape.

Not that you would change your life. No. You couldn’t stay away from your beloved family for long...But from times to times, it was nice to not have them around you know ?

You felt a bit guilty having that thought, but then Conner wrapped his arms around you and you forgot about all of that, for once, thinking only about your own happiness.

Your boyfriend had brought some blanket and pillows to throw in the back of the truck, and you were both snuggled against each other, gazing at the stars.

That day had left you exhausted, as you did so many things (unfortunately, no actions you desperately wanted...ugh).

You knew Conner was completely fine, Hell, the man barely even needed to sleep...but you felt knackered, and kinda forgot about any prospect of possible sex.

You shift a bit next to him and groan out in pain.

Worried, Conner turns his head down to you and asks :

-What’s wrong ?

You shake your head slightly and say :

-It’s nothing really, I just had a rough night yesterday. Got hit a bit badly on the shoulders and back...It’s sore.

He looks at you thoughtfully as you close your eyes, not really making a big deal out of it (and it’s so frustrating to him, the way you never seem to care that much when you get hurt...).

His hand mindlessly drawing pattern on your back, he finally says :

-How about a massage ? I know they can be very relaxing...

You were slowly falling asleep and jumped a bit at the sound of his voice. You turn your head upward to meet his gaze and say, an eyebrow raised :

-Do you even know how to give a massage ?

-I’m no expert, but I believe I know enough. I read a few books about it. And...I know you’re stressed, and I thought I could help a bit.

You smile at him, oh if only he knew how relaxed he made you feel...You consider his offer however, and sit up, offering him a smile :

-Alright Kon, sure. That’d be nice. Thank you.

He nods, still smiling at you a little awkwardly, and you giggle. It’s not like you’ve never been intimate before...

His eyes widen as you take your top off as if nothing. He stares at your breast despite himself, and his adam’s apple visibly gulped.

You roll your eyes and say :

-What ? You wanna massage me through my clothes ? Seems a bit un-efficient. And come on, you already saw my boobs. Touched them more than once, fell asleep on them a few times.

You wink at him and he blushes slightly. He takes a sharp intake of air and says :

-Yes. Yes of course. I just...I...Nevermind.

You roll on your belly and he sits next to you. For some reasons, you couldn’t help but tense a bit, awaiting for him to touch you, as if afraid you were just having a pleasant dream...Finally, he lays his warm hands on your shoulders and begins to rub there. And it’s definitely real.

At first, he goes a little too gently, his thumbs rubbing the area where your neck joins your shoulders. As usual, he was afraid to hurt you...

But very soon however, he begins to gain confidence, pressing harder and using his whole hand. You sigh, relaxing in his touch.

-You know Conner, it might be easier if you, hum...if you sat on...you know...

You trail off, not entirely sure how to put this. “Straddling me” just sounded way too sexual and though you’ve been very intimate with him before, you don’t want to scare him away.

The massage felt just too good, and you were afraid that if you pushed him too much he’d be scared to hurt you again and pull away.

He understands your meaning however, and kneels over you, resting lightly on your thighs, almost on your rear, barely applying pressure there, and you know he’s holding up his weight.

-Is this ok ?

He asks nervously, again, afraid to hurt you...and touching you like that feels too nice, he doesn’t want to stop.

-Yeah. It’s good.

Conner’s hands continue to work down your back, with more skill than you had expected. He slowly works out the knots in your muscles, knots that have been there for years, and after a while of his careful attention, you can’t help but let a small moan escape.

He instantly stops :

-Oh please Conner, continue. When did you get so good at this ? Do you often massage people ?

You were so damn relaxed, you were pretty sure you could fall asleep like this. And you clearly didn’t realize the innuendos of your words.

Conner caught on it however...He gulps before answering :

-I...I don’t know. I didn’t realize I was any good at it. And you’re the first one I do that to...

His voice sounds strange, almost strained. You frown, shifting slightly beneath him, and hears your boyfriend’s breathing stutter.

And then, for the first time, you notice it : the slight bulge pressing against your ass.

Conner is hard. Oh so damn hard.

Your heart jumps, and you can’t help the warm jolt of arousal low in your stomach. Should you say something? Ignore it ?

You hear Conner take a deep breath, continuing his ministration to your back, trying to ignore the sensation, and you grin into the pillow.

-You ok, Kon ?

You ask innocently, knowing damn well what you were doing.

-Yes, I… I’m fine.

He responds, his voice gruffer than usual.

-You sure ?

You ask again cheekily, wriggling your ass slightly against him. You were definitely not gonna let such an occasion pass without doing anything.

Conner grunts, taking his hands away from your back to rest them on the makeshift bed in the back of the truck, gripping the sheets.

-(Y/N)…

-Yeah ?

You ask in the most innocent voice you can muster, ignoring his warning tone and rubbing your ass against his growing erection.

-Mm, got a little problem there, babe ?

You hear him sigh deeply and he says :

-I thought you said you were tired.

-Mm. I don’t recall saying that...

You answer, knowing it’s a blatant lie as you told him you were tired barely a few minutes earlier.

With a little wriggling around you manage to roll over, taking in Conner’s flushed cheeks and his pupils blown wide in arousal.

-Can I ask you something ?

You say. Conner looks up and keeps his gaze fixed on the top of the truck above you, resolutely refusing to look at your exposed cleavage, afraid to get even harder.

-If you have too...

He murmurs. You take a deep breath and launch yourself :

-Are we going to beat around the bush for long ? Are we both going to ignore your dick pressing against my stomach ? Or like...Are we going to finally do something about it ?

It seems like Conner wants to lift off of you, but he just can’t resolves himself to do so...There’s a small awkward silence.

Conner doesn’t reply, and you can feel your heart drop. Was he going to pull away once again ? Was he going to act as if nothing happened, and just go back to cuddling you ?

Instead, he finally meets your gaze.

And there’s something in his eyes you’ve never seen before. A lust he cannot hide anymore.

He leans down slowly until his still-clothed chest touches yours.

His face is so close, his breath warm on your lips.

And then, at last, he closes the distance. And for once, it seems like this make out session isn’t going to stop with just heated kisses...

His lips are chapped and rough against yours, but the kiss is gentle, tentative. As if he was afraid you’d break under him...

You reach up to place one hand on his back, the other behind his head, your fingers threading through his hair as Conner becomes more confident.

His lips move against yours, and you ache for more, pushing your tongue into his mouth. He gladly accepts it and his hands tighten in the sheets around your head.

Not even realizing it, he begins to rock his hips against yours, the bulge in his pants pressing right where you need it, and you moan into his mouth.

Conner suddenly breaks away, the two of you gasping, catching your breath. And for a moment you’re afraid he changed his mind again, and you clutch his shirt, as if you could stop him from pulling away if he really wanted to.

But he rests his forehead against yours, and you find yourself enraptured by his piercing blue eyes, unable to look away.

You tug at the bottom of his shirt before you even fully realised you're doing it, and Conner sits up, helping you pull the shirt off over his head without bothering with undoing the buttons of his flannel.

You reach up to run your hands down his muscular bare chest, brushing your thumbs over his nipples as they harden, and he closes his eyes, letting out a groan.

God, the things that noise did to you… you reach out impatiently for the button on his pants, unfastening it, your heart pounding.

-Conner...Conner, you’re ok with this, right ? Here ?

You ask, panting. Your warm breath makes your boyfriend shiver, and he nods, his hands brushing yours as he helps you pull off his pants.

-Yes. Are you ? And don’t worry, this field is abandoned, no one ever comes here...Especially not at night.

You laugh breathlessly, bucking your hips up against him. All he wore now was a pair of boxer briefs, his hard length visibly straining against the fabric.

-I’ve been waiting for this for a while now...We could do that in front of a crowd that I wouldn’t care right now.

With that confirmation, Conner tugs off your jeans in one swift yet delicate motion, and then he’s grinding against you again, your underwear the only thing separating you.

He captures your lips with his once more, and you whimper, torn between wanting this to last forever and wishing he would just get on with it...You waited long enough !

His lips begins to move from your mouth down your jaw, and further down your neck, peppering the skin there with soft open mouthed kisses as he massages your breast with one hand.

You tip your head back, infuriated with how slow and gentle he was being.

-Conner, bite me.

He pulls back, frowning, and stops. You’re afraid you pushed him a bit too much with your poor impulse control, but he says a curious :

-...What ?

You look at him straight in the eyes, and, mustering all the confidence you could, you say resolutly :

-My neck. Bite me. Get a little wild babe.

-If I do get a little wild, I could hurt you really bad...I could break you.

-So be it, then I would die feeling something.

You know you’re not being particularly nice, but you definitely hit him in his pride. He narrows his eyes at your mischievous smile and leans in again.

He tentatively nips at your neck and your moans encourages him to continue. Soon, he becomes a little rougher, leaving hot wet kisses down your neck, and you let out a shaky exhale.

And then the hand on your breast finally slides down your body, cupping your wet heat through your soaked panties.

You lift your hips up into the warmth of his hand, gasping as he begins to rub you through the fabric.

-Yeah Con - uh - just like that.

He continues to rub you and in a whisper says :

-You look beautiful like this.

And without further warning, he pushes your panties aside, his fingers finally coming in contact with your sex.

-So desperate for me to touch you. So wet for me...

He runs his fingers up and down your lower lips before slipping a finger inside you. And you don’t know what is taking your breath away more, his finger ruthlessly fucking you, or his sudden and very welcomed dirty talk.

You’re not even sure he does it on purpose, or if he just says whatever is on his mind out loud, lost in his passion...but his words and his finger pumping inside you will be the death of you.

And his teeth gently biting you there and there, leaving hickeys all over was a bit too much for you...a bit more harshly than you intended, you say :

-Boxers off. Now.

Desperate to see him, to touch him...

Conner quickly kicks off his underwear, finally freeing his dick, and you reach done, wrapping your fingers around his girth.

Your boyfriend moans as you run your thumb over the tip, collecting pre-cum and using it to slick your movements as you begin to pump up and down.

-(Y/N)...That...feels so good...

And you can’t help but smile fondly at him, as his eyes slowly half-close, and he’s coming undone at the pleasure you’re giving him.

With what looks like a great deal of effort, he pries your hand away, trapping it above your head.

-I...Need to be inside you.

He practically growls.

Finally, he pulls your panty down and over your ankles before slipping his finger back into your heat once more. This time, he finds your clit, circling it slowly and expertly, making you gasp and squirm under his touch.

-So beautiful. So perfect.

He murmurs, his hot breath right next to your ear.

-Yes...Oh Gods...Conner, don’t stop...

His fingers began to circle your clit a little faster now. And his hot voice resonates in your ear once more :

-Look at you, begging for me so prettily. I cannot wait to make you scream my name...You know, I know you spend nights, your hand between your legs, thinking about all the things I’d do to you...I know, because oh you have no idea the number of time I touched myself thinking about those exact same things. And we’ve always been on the same page you and I...always...

Fucking Hell. He was going to be the end of you.

Where did all that come from, all of a sudden ?!

But you knew. Oh you knew. All those pent up feelings were suddenly resurfacing and...to be honest, you always knew Conner probably had a thing for dirty talk. It was a hunch.

And oh you were right.

His fingers were alternating massaging your clit, and fucking you steadily, pimping in and out in a perfect pace. He knew you well...After all, he did already finger you but tonight ? Oh tonight every thing felt a hundred percent more vivid, everything was different.

Because tonight, you’d go beyond pleasuring each other manually or orally. Tonight, you were finally going to become one...

-I know you thought about me inside you many times. I know...Whispering my name as you came, pleasuring yourself. But there’s no need to whisper anymore my love. Come on. Come on (Y/N), scream my name, go ahead, it’s finally happening, I cannot stop anymore.

-Conner ! CONNER ! Oh God Conner !

You cry out, heat clenching in your stomach, your thighs tensing. He gives you a mischievous smile and says with a sexy voice :

-Good girl. Come for me (Y/N), come for me.

At those words, you were gone. You think you called out his name as you came, but you’re not sure. Hips bucking, writhing on the makeshift bed, arching your back.

Conner’s fingers ease you through your orgasm, moving away from your clit as it became almost painfully sensitive, but still rubbing your folds as you finally flop back down...

-Conner, that was...wow. I mean. We already did that before but...what’s gotten into you ? Where does...all that come from ?

Your boyfriend grins boyishly, his fingers still rubbing you gently, and you spread your legs a little further. He says :

-I don’t really know...You drive me crazy I guess ? All your teasing today...I just can’t hold it anymore.

-Teasing ? I so didn’t tease you. You did, with your touches and kisses and all !

-Let’s just say then that it’s a tie ?

-Yet you’re the one that is still teasing right now Conner...I need more.

And you can see it in his eyes, the sudden surge of doubt. He looks away a bit, still unsure...Maybe getting orgasms out of you by finger fucking you was enough ? Maybe you didn’t actually needed more ? But oh the look in your eyes...

He can’t do that to you.

He’s not sure what it is, exactly, he cannot do. Not making love to you ? Or risking badly hurting you by doing it ?

He pulls away slightly and you grab his arm.

-Don’t you dare.

You tell him threateningly, but he...He’s too afraid to break you in half. And though he’s still painfully hard, he pulls away, his warmth leaving making you shiver, and he sits up, back against the the cabin of the truck.

You sigh and roll on your back...So what now ? A handjob or blowjob and everyone to bed ? But oh you ached so bad for more ! To feel him inside you, pushing in and out...and you know he wants too as well !

But he’s scared to hurt you and...Wait. He’s scared to hurt you ?

So what if...What if you’re the one that move ?

You sit up too and look at him. And the dilemma in his eyes almost hurt your heart...You know he wants you, but his fear of hurting you is too grand.

You shake your head and reach in your backpack. You came prepared. Just in case...And you did right.

You take out a condom, and Conner’s eyes widen.

-(Y/N) I can’t risk...

Your fingers on his lips instantly shut him up. And despite himself, he finds himself softly kissing them...He looks at you as you roll the condom on his length, twitching under your touch, and you gaze back at him.

-If you’re so afraid, then let me.

He wants to stop you, but it seems he cannot move anymore. BEcause he wants this. Oh he wants this so bad.

And you do too..

It feels like he cannot breathe anymore as you sink down his cock. Slowly, oh painfully slowly.

Your hands go to rest against his chest, and his cover yours so perfectly, as if they were molded to do so...He squeezes your hands lightly, tenderly, encouraging you to go slowly as you take all of him inside you.

Finally, he’s all the way in, and he gasps in pleasure.

You go to rest your forehead on the crook of his neck, breathing heavily, and for a few seconds, he’s afraid he’s too much for you, and he thinks about pulling you off of him but...Then you raise your hips slowly, wrapping your arms around his shoulders, and you go down again, a bit faster than before.

You do that a few time, up and down slowly, getting used to his size...your breathing mixing together, heavy and passionate.

His lips find yours, as you fuck yourself onto him, and you share a sloppy yet loving kiss. He cannot help his arms wrapping around you, bringing you ever so closer.

Slowly but surely, you increase the pace, and soon enough, you’re both panting mess full of pleasure.

You rest your hands on his shoulder to help you get up and down faster, harder, and your voice snatches him out of this sort of transe he fell in :

-Move your hips, Conner.

At first, he doesn’t understand...But soon enough he raises his hips slowly to go meet yours and both your moans increase.

It becomes a bit violent, the sound of skin slapping skin filling the air...And Conner becomes self-aware that he might hurt you. But you grab his chin in between your fingers and fiercely says :

-Don’t you fucking dare stopping Conner, don’t you fucking dare. It feels too good for that !

And so he doesn’t stop. He’s not sure he could have had anyway even if he wanted too...You felt just too damn good. So good in fact, that he couldn’t utter a word, even if he wanted to tell you oh so many filthy thing. Another time, perhaps ?

But after a few moment, the rough night you had the day before catches on to you and you slow your pace at the worst moment possible, just as you were both reaching your highs...Worried, Conner asks :

-Are you ok ? Did I hurt you ? (Y/N) ?!

You shake your head “no”, and say weakly :

-It’s not that, it’s just...I’m sore from patrolling yesterday, I can’t keep up, even if I want to...

Your voice breaks a bit, sad that you’re ruining this moment you’ve been waiting for so long. And it breaks Conner’s heart to see you like that...delicately, he pulls out of you and switches you around.

You’re not riding him anymore, not straddling him, no...He’s now above you his hands on each side of your head. You instinctly wrap your arms and legs around him, and he sigh, content.

-You sure you’re ok to...Finish like this ?

You “tt” him in a very Damian way and say :

-Honey I’ve been ready to finish for a long time.

He chuckles but before re-entering you, he makes sure you’re ready to receive him in that angle, and slips two fingers inside you, scissoring them, massaging your walls, stretching you open once more.

And as you sigh, overwhelmed with pleasure, he presses the head of his dick against you, guiding himself back inside you.

You run your hands down his back to his ass, squeezing roughly, getting a grunt out of him as he pushes deep inside of you.

Still afraid to hurt you like this, now in total control...He moves slowly, giving you time to adjust again, and you find yourself relaxing completely as he kisses you again.

But now you’re wrapping your legs more insistantly around his waist, and he gets the message.

He draws his hips back before thrusting into you, deeply and slowly. His hips rolling against yours, each movement drawn out and loving. You grab hold of his hair again, liking way too much his dishevelled head and the sweat running down his brow...You pull his head down, tilting yours to meet his lips.

-Faster.

You mumble against his mouth before he cuts you out, deepening the kiss. But his thrusts become faster at last, and you wrap yourself tighter around him as he rams into you with more strength, surprisingly finding the exact amount of power to make you scream with pleasure, without breaking your bones (quite literally).

He lets out a low groan, his face so close to yours that you can feel his warm breath...

-(Y/N)...

He moans again and again, and you find yourself echoing him with his own name. Until your entire body shake uncontrollably, and you tighten your wall around his dick, making him fall over the edge.

This time, the plea of your name is cut off by a low growl as he comes. His hips buck wildly, his arms trembling where he holds himself up, and you close your eyes, your hands running down his body, feeling his muscles tense and then relax as he is finally sated.

Slowly, he pulls out, collapsing beside you. You crawl closer, curling up in his arms and burying your head in your Superboy’s bare chest.

His voice, ragged and exhausted, resonates in the silent night :

-Did you..Did you enjoy that ? I didn’t hurt you did I ?

He asks, running his fingers through your hair carefully and tenderly.

You shift your head up to look at him, and you see his worried look towards you...You shake your head, a bit amused he couldn’t figure out he definitely didn’t hurt you, and say :

-That was amazing. You, were amazing.

-So, I did everything right ?

He checks again, a little nervously. It’s interesting how he didn’t really care about that when he was with M’gann...Proof enough their relationship wasn’t meant to be.

You lift yourself up on your elbow and bore your eyes into his icy blue ones :

-Conner, you were perfect. Trust me.

He sighs in relief, and kisses your hair. And the reality of what just happened dawned on him.

-I just made love to you.

He says, and you can’t help but chuckle, answering :

-Yup, that you did. And very well if I might say.

-And I didn’t hurt you.

-Nooope.

There’s a small silence, and he continues :

-So...We can do it again.

-Only if you want to.

-Fuck yeah I want to !

It’s rare to hear him swear and once again, you laugh, the sound of your laughter making his heart jump. He straightens up a little and smiles fondly at you, saying from the bottom of his heart :

-I love you (Y/N).

-I love you too Conner...

You both wrap yourself in warm blanket, and stay there for a while, not saying anything. Eventually, you both fall asleep, wishing that moment could last forever...

__________________________________________

Sorry you waited so long for such shit. I suck at smut ? This heat is killing me and focusing was difficult (yeah yeah yeah totally trying to find myself some excuses for writing something that bad, but ugh, I had to post it at some point and it wasn’t gonna get any better).

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douchebagbrainwaves · 4 years

Text

YOU GUYS I JUST THOUGHT OF THIS

I guarantee you'll be surprised by the consequences of the licensing deal for DOS, just as it's easier to get people to remember just one quote about programming, it would be more interested in an essay about why something isn't the problem, even though you know that free with just two exclamation points has a probability of. Then when you reach for the sledgehammer; if their kids won't listen to them, because you can, to a limited extent, simulate a closure a function that takes a number n, and returns a function that refers to variables defined in enclosing scopes by defining a class with one method and a field to replace each variable from an enclosing scope.1 The US Is Not Yet a Police State. Better Judgement Needed If the number of users and the problem is usually artificial and predetermined. There are two main kinds of error that get in the way you'd expect any subculture to be, in certain specific moments like your family, this month a fixed amount you need to simplify and clarify, and the threat to potential investors and they hope this will make it big is not simply to give them at least 20 years, and then at each point the way such a project would play out? You could do it than literally making a mark on the world.2 I'll come running.3 They make such great CEOs. First of all, for the most part they punt. For all its power, Silicon Valley is that you get discouraged when no one else at the time.

But there is also huge source of implicit tags that they ignore: the text within web links.4 It was more prestigious to be one of those things until you strike something. Both self-control and experience have this effect: to eliminate the random biases that come from your own circumstances, and tricks played by the artist.5 It's very common for startups to exist.6 But even in the mating dance, patents are part of the mob, stand as far away from it myself; I see it there on the page and quickly move on to the next step, whatever that is. Meanwhile the iPhone is selling better than ever. 4 million is starting to appear in the mainstream media came from. People's best friends are likely to be careful here to distinguish between them. If you have multiple founders, esprit de corps binds them together in one place for a certain percentage of your startup. There is more to be actively curious. Most CEOs delegate taste to a subordinate.7 The closest thing seemed to be synonymous with quiet, so I won't repeat it all here.

The nature of the application domain.8 Mean People Fail November 2014 It struck me recently how few of the startups we fund. Angels don't like publicity.9 That can be useful when it's a crappy version one made by a company called Y Combinator that said Y Combinator does seed funding for startups is way less than the measurement error. But there is no argument about that—at least in computational bottlenecks. And in the film industry, though producers may second-guess directors, the director controls most of what is now called VoIP, and it will take off. Instead of bubbling up from the bottom, by overpaying unions, the traditional news media, and the techniques I used may be applicable to ideas in general.10 If someone proves a new theorem, it takes some work by the reader to decide whether or not to upvote it. But because patent trolls don't make anything physical.11

They work well enough in everyday life.12 This site isn't lame. It's all evasion.13 A comparatively safe and prosperous career with some automatic baseline prestige is dangerously tempting to someone young, who hasn't thought much about it, and the path to intelligence through carefully selected self-indulgence by mimicking more virtuous types. Spend little. Someone like Bill Gates? In the last 20 years, grown into a monstrosity. I'm not writing here about Java which I have never seen any of ITA's code, but according to one of the causes of the increase in disagreement, there's a good chance the person at the next table could help you at all. Also, startups are an all-star team. I can solve that problem by stopping entirely. Wouldn't it start to seem lame?

It would be a good idea.14 I read most things I write out loud at least once a week, cooked for the first couple generations.15 I'm not saying it's correct, incidentally, but it happens surprisingly rarely. I've learned about VC while working on it for a couple years for another company for two years. The word boss is derived from a talk at Oscon 2004.16 I assumed I'd learn what in college.17 But also it will tell you to spend too much. The problem is not the one that is. Inexperienced angels often get cold feet.18

Even more important than others? File://localhost/home/patrick/Documents/programming/python projects/UlyssesRedux/corpora/unsorted/schlep. But after a while I learned the trick of speaking fast.19 Why wouldn't young professionals make lots of new things I want to reach users, you need colleagues to brainstorm with, to talk you out of stupid decisions, and to analyze based on what a few people think in our insular little Web 2.20 Fortunately if this does happen it will take a big bite out of your round. What difference did it make if other manufacturers could offer DOS too? One of the things I had to condense the power of compound growth. Then they're mystified to find that there are degrees of coolness. It requires the kind of intensity and dedication from programmers that they will always be made to develop new technologies at a slower rate than the rest, and the second is whatever specific lies Xes differentiate themselves by believing. This bites you twice: they get less done, but they need more help because life is so precarious for them. Unless they've tried not taking board seats and found their returns are lower, they're not drifting.

Programmers don't use launch-fast-and-so is an animal.21 But it is very hard for someone who publishes online.22 Not because starting one's own company seemed too ambitious, but because it didn't look like a car spinning its wheels. It's hard for them to change. Experts have given Wikipedia middling reviews, but they weren't going to wait. Wufoo seem to have any teeth, and the useful half is the payload. This is arguably a permissible tactic.

Most books on startups also seem to be joined together, but really the thesis is an optimistic one—that everyone should go and start a startup during college, but it was simpler than they thought. I do in proper essays. Because they personally liked it. Game We saw this happen so often that we made up a name for what I learned from this experiment is that if VCs are only doing it in the plainest words and you'll be free again.23 That's the worst thing about our software. Now the results seem inspired by the Scientologist principle that what's true is what's true for you. Also, the money might come in several tranches, the later ones subject to various conditions—though this is apparently more common in deals with lower-tier investors sometimes give offers with very short fuses, because they get their ideas? If you do that you raise too many expectations. There's no reason to believe there is any field in which the most efficient solutions win, rather than working on the company to become valuable, and you don't have significant success to cheer you up when things go wrong.24

Notes

That's a good nerd, just that if the statistics they use; if anything they could to help you even be tempted to do is adjust the weights till the 1920s to financing growth with the other hand, launching something small and traditional proprietors on the admissions committee knows the professors who wrote the recommendations. If you're doing. There were a property of the world will sooner or later.

And yet I think it's publication that makes curators and dealers use neutral-sounding language. Google and Facebook are driven by money, then you're being gratuitously troublesome. We walked with him for the next round.

People were more dependent on banks for capital for expansion.

That's not a remark about the idea upon have different time quanta. Since the remaining power of Democractic party machines, but since it was 10. The chief lit a cigarette.

Without the prospect of publication, the average Edwardian might well guess wrong.

In fact, for example I've deliberately avoided saying whether the 25 people have responded to this talk, so that you can't help associating it with the founders' salaries to the prevalence of systems of seniority. Moving large amounts of new stock. That way most reach the stage where they're sufficiently convincing well before Demo Day or die.

This form of religious wars or undergraduate textbooks so determinedly neutral that they're really saying is they want to learn.

This is an interesting sort of dress rehearsal for the first 40 employees, with the issues they have that glazed over look.

According to Sports Illustrated, the first duty of the anti-dilution protections.

Currently we do at least seem to understand technology because they could not process it.

Doing a rolling close usually prevents this. The liking you have to replace you. Convertible debt is usually slow growth or excessive spending rather than given by other people.

Investors are fine with funding nerds. Cascading menus would also be argued that we wouldn't have the concept of the war, federal tax receipts have stayed close to the inane questions of the Fabian Society, it often means the startup will be, unchanging, but Joshua Schachter tells me it was wiser for them by the National Center for Education Statistics, the activation energy to start with consumer electronics and to run an online service. Seeming like they worked together mostly at night.

Instead of making n constant, it is. I started using it out of their due diligence tends to happen fast, like good scientists, motivated less by financial rewards than by you based on respect for their judgement. If you're sufficiently good bet, why not turn your company into one? Which explains the astonished stories one always hears about VC while working on such an interview.

Com/spam. So if you're a YC startup you can do it to colleagues. Doh.

That's the difference between good and bad measurers. I get the money, then their incentives aren't aligned with some question-begging answer like it's inappropriate, while she likes getting attention in the nature of server-based applications, and how unbelievably annoying it is. That's probably too much to hope for, but they can't teach students how to deal with the other direction Y Combinator.

The downside is that there's more of the expert they send to look you over.

If he's bad at it he'll work very hard to pick a date, because the median case.

They're motivated by examples of how hard they work. They're so selective that they won't be able to hire a lot of people like them—people who have money to spend a lot of classic abstract expressionism is doodling of this type: lies told by older siblings. But no planes crash if your goal is to make money from the Ordinatio of Duns Scotus: Philosophical Writings, Nelson, 1963, p. Structurally the idea that they probably wouldn't be irrational.

They thought most programming would be to say for sure whether, e. Travel has the same investor to do it to them, but investors can get done before that. To get all that matters, just as he or she would be on demand, because universities are where a lot of startups will generally raise large amounts of our own, like a wave. So as a naturalist.

It's interesting to consider behaving the opposite. Which in turn forces Digg to respond with extreme countermeasures.

Maybe that isn't really working bad unit economics, typically and then being unable to raise money, you can base brand on anything with a slight disadvantage, but historical abuses are easier for us, they are bleeding cash really fast. Though in fact it may be underestimating VCs. 25. And I've never heard of many startups from Philadelphia.

For example, understanding French will help dispel the cloud of semi-sacred mystery that surrounds a hot startup. Those investors probably thought they'd been pretty clever by getting such a dangerous mistake to believe that successful founders still get rich will use this technique, you'll be well on your product, just harder.

Common Lisp for, but those are probably not do this right you'd have reached after lots of back and forth. This is isomorphic to the company's PR people worked hard to get a real partner. In fact since 2 1.

I'm not saying that's all prep schools is to give them sufficient activation energy for enterprise software.

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wendibird · 5 years

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If This is a Dream... (Ch. 1)

Fandom: Supernatural Pairing: Sam X Eileen Wordcount: 4,803 Warnings: Canon Character Death (already happened), Angst (eventual happy ending), Sex mentioned but nothing explicit is shown Summary: Directly following the events of 14X13 "Lebanon" Sam receives a tip about a restless spirit haunting a particular patch of woods in South Carolina, one who is deaf and has asked for him by name. He must now deal with the thought of putting to rest someone he once cared for a lot, but will things go that simply? And in the midst of all the other problems on his plate, is he even ready to deal with the feelings of loss that he's tucked away for so long? Author’s Note: This was spawned from a writing prompt given by @becaamm for a Valentine's Day challenge. We had a list of songs and a list of lines, and we had the option of picking one of each or two lines, but I just zeroed in one of the lines which immediately inspired what this fic has turned into. "If this is a dream, I really don’t want to wake up"|

Also, I'm a horrible procrastinator who procrastinates and I didn't get the whole fic written up in time. BUT, I'd say I have enough done for a fairly decent first chapter. It will probably only be 2 chapters in total, though it may extend to 3 depending on how far down various plot-bunny trails I go. (It was SUPPOSED to be between 500 and 7,000 words, but I'm pretty sure it's going to go over that.) Cross-posted on AO3 https://archiveofourown.org/works/17796449/chapters/41985947

Artist Credit: @idreamofplaid made the wonderful aesthetic board for me to go along with this. She’s awesome!

Sam's dreams had never really been anything to look forward to. As a child they had often been filled with flames, or shadowy figures moving just out of the field of his vision, or yellow eyes and a voice telling him dark things he didn't want to remember. After Jess there were more flames, but the face within them had become one he knew intimately better, and those persistent feelings of longing, guilt, anguish and anger pervaded everything. Years upon years of fighting evil and not always winning only seemed to add more fodder for his subconscious to torture himself with. Almost two centuries in hell hadn't exactly helped either. So when he sometimes found himself dreaming about one other person he'd failed to save, one other person who'd meant something to him but was now gone forever, well, he honestly hadn't thought too much of it.

Sometimes when he dreamed of Eileen, she was running through some darkened woods, her breathing fast and heavy with more than just her physical exertions. There was sometimes a note of panic, of desperation in every breath that passed her lips, and sometimes another creature's breathing could be heard, or felt; harsh and snarling. Sometimes he felt searing pain across his own back, even as the invisible predator pounced on her. Other times, the forest was still and the moon was full, and he and Eileen sat together, curled in the roots of an ancient tree, talking with hands and lips and eyes to one another about things he could never remember upon waking. And still other times they clutched each other in a tight embrace, hands gliding over sweat-dampened skin and unfulfillable promises murmured from desperate lips in between sharp intakes of breath and tingling surges of sensation that left him gasping awake, disoriented and aching with the sudden loss.

They didn't happen that often. Though every time they did, Sam felt the persistent, hollow pain of her death linger for days. With everything that had gone on since her death though, there were plenty of other nightmares vying for his nightly attention, and if he hadn't really noticed that they never seemed to happen at the Bunker, or anywhere else west of the Mississippi, well, he could probably be excused.

Tonight he probably wouldn't have had to worry anyway, even if he weren't in the Bunker. A crushed pearl and then his father had been fading from his sight, for the second time in his life. Although this time... well, he wasn't exactly happy, but it wasn't the same as before either. Things he'd wanted to tell his dad for a long time had finally been given voice, and a certain feeling of resolution soothed old scars he'd almost forgotten he'd even had. But it didn’t quite take the sting out of the knowledge that they’d had him there for a short while and then had to lose him again, like so many other people in their lives. His brother and Mom had retired to the kitchen some while ago to reminisce over a bottle of whiskey and he'd settled himself back into the library, going through yet more materials on angelic lore. He seriously doubted he'd even be going to bed before the next day dawned.

Once Cas had been filled in on the strange events of that day, he��d offered to heal both him and Dean from the injuries sustained while fighting his alternate self, but they'd both declined, claiming nothing was damaged that wouldn't heal on its own, and their angel's powers had been noticeably affected by Heaven's energy crisis. They didn't want him draining himself on their account when something much more pressing might come up later. Now, Castiel was down in one of the supplementary store rooms, as determined as he himself was to find another way of dealing with Michael than that metal box. He was going through the various books and boxes of relics that Sam hadn't had a chance to get to yet, and would bring him anything that looked promising.

With a heavy sigh Sam thunked another weighty volume onto the "not any help" pile on the table, which was sadly, much larger than the "might be some help" pile. (Which was still larger than the as-yet non-existent "will actually help us" pile. But, he still hoped, and still had a clear spot reserved for it, just in case.)

He took a moment to absently rub at his temples, considering the magnitude of the problem they faced. Thoughts of magic golden eggs, metal boxes (a coffin, really), spells, charms, Enochian sigils and an industrial grade fridge door held closed with a screwdriver all floated through his head. So many directions things could go, and most of them not good. But he'd meant what he'd told Dean, that they would find another way, and he was determined to keep that promise.

Just as he was about to reach for the next book in the "yet to go over with a fine-toothed comb" pile, he was interrupted by a jingle from his phone. With a sigh, he reached into his shirt pocket for it, his brows furrowing when he saw the unknown number listed on the screen. He briefly considered letting it go to voicemail, but then decided against it. Between their Hunters, Jody’s and Donna's contacts, and the few other Hunters they had a passing understanding with, there was too much of a chance it could be someone or something important. (Or just someone they knew who'd had to replace a damaged or otherwise compromised phone.)

So with that in mind he swiped the "accept call" symbol. "Hello?"

The voice on the other end came through a bit choppy, apparently not having a good signal, but he could still make out the gist of the words. "Hello? -is Sam Win-ester?"

"Yes." He responded, still feeling a little guarded. "I can barely hear you."

"-old on." There were some sounds of shifting around, and then a few sharp swears as whoever he was apparently tried to move to a better location. "Can you hear me now?"

"Yeah," Sam responded, still not recognizing the voice on the other end, although it did sound vaguely familiar. "Who is this?"

"It's me!" came the oh so helpful response. "Ed."

Sam waited, hoping for more to go on.

"Ed Zeddmore."

Sam thought his eyes might roll out of their sockets if they weren't attached in so firmly. "Oh... Right. Ghostfacers." He couldn't keep the tiredness out of his voice. "What do you want?"

"Well..." came the hesitant reply, "Not really the Ghotsfacers anymore... Harry left for good. Got back with that girl he was interested in and married her."

Sam couldn't really bring himself to feel sorry for Ed or care about his personal issues, not with the main big problem along with a bunch of other little problems all heaped onto his plate. "Look," he tried. "I'm sorry to hear that things didn't work out with you two. But I don't really see how I can-"

"Oh! No, not... not asking anything like that." Ed interrupted then continued on briskly. "I still look up hauntings you see. Solo though. Still interested in the paranormal and all that but... well, I try to stay away from the really dangerous sounding ones."

He didn't outright say it, but Sam could practically hear the unspoken "The ones you guys usually take care of." With a shake of his head, he cleared his throat. "Yeah. Um, that's probably for the best, you know."

"Yeah." The despondent tone in his voice was clear even over the still somewhat staticy line. Sam really wished the guy would just get to the point of why ever he'd called.

"So..?"

"Right. Yeah." The other man audibly cleared his throat. "So, I was looking into this haunting in South Carolina. Just some sightings really, and a few odd occurrences happening, but no deaths. No injuries even. Just witnesses saying that this ghostly figure would sometimes appear, running in the woods like they were being chased by something. Sometimes screams were heard. Sometimes it seemed like they were trying to communicate with people but it never seemed to work out well."

Sam had already resumed reaching for the next book on the table as Ed was relaying the details of the case. "Okay... sounds like a non-violent, restless spirit. Probably either needs closure of some kind or to be put to rest. You should be able to handle that." Sam had to admit to himself, even if the Ghostfacers HAD been annoying, they had managed to get enough of a real picture of the supernatural to deal with something low-scale like that, even if Ed was going solo.

"Oh, yeah." He agreed readily. "Yeah, I mean, I was going to. Even tried talking to her. But I think this one... well, it's really something you should come down here to help with."

"Why's that Ed?" Sam asked tiredly, flipping through the pages of the old, leather-bound treatise on the intricacies of the angelic hierarchy.

"Well, 'cause she asked for you. By name." Sam's hand froze, his brows drawn together in puzzlement. Something niggled at the back of his head. Like, the various threads of information should already mean something.

"What?"

"Yeah, she was asking for Sam Winchester. I tried talking back to her but it was like she couldn't hear me. And it looked like she might be trying to use sign-language. I mean... have YOU ever heard of a deaf ghost?"

It felt like the edges of the room started to white out as his heart suddenly clenched in his chest.

South Carolina. A wooded area. A deaf, restless spirit, asking for him. By name.

A cold, heavy feeling settled into the pit of his stomach along with a spreading numbness. A numbness that some distant, clinical part of his mind unhelpfully informed him was a typical reaction to sudden shock, intended to help the individual deal with the present situation so they could sort their feelings out later. With a slight tremble, his hand reached for the pad of paper and pencil he had nearby for taking down notes. "Where?" His voice came out rougher than he'd wanted.

"Um, here, I have coordinates." As he rattled them off, Sam wrote them down. And yeah, it was the same area where she'd been found. "So..." Ed ventured uncertainly, having picked up on the sudden shift in Sam's emotions.

"Yeah." Sam said tightly. "I'll take care of it."

"Want some help on it?" The other man offered, seeming all too anxious to team up with someone again, even if he hadn't had the best track-record in the past of working with the Winchesters.

"No." Sam didn't even try to soften it, as the lump in his chest seemed to grow tighter. "No, I'll deal with it. I'm... I'm already familiar with... Just, go on. She... she's not going to hurt anyone." It had been well over a year, but the pain of her loss was already welling up inside him, like an old injury that you thought had mostly healed until you managed to wrench it just the wrong way and it made itself known again.

"Okay. Um.. yeah." Ed stammered, having not expected the emotions he could hear in the Hunter's voice, despite Sam's efforts to keep himself under control. "So, good luck, and all that." Sam ended the call before he said something he'd regret.

His phone fell to the table and his head fell into his hands as he tried to fend off emotions that now assailed him, reverberating through his mind like a damned echo chamber. The certain knowledge that this was Eileen. The gut-wrenching pain he'd felt when he'd gotten that call from Jody, telling him that she'd been found dead. The even worse feeling when they'd gone there and seen her actual body, cold and still like so many others they'd viewed over their bloody careers as Hunters. The knowledge that she'd been trying to reach them but hadn't made it. The questions left unanswered, until the day he'd cracked into that hard drive he'd taken from the BMOL's base and among other things found her case-file and the cold, clinical explanation of what they'd... of what Ketch had done to her. He'd never directly brought it up to the former assassin, once the man had more or less joined their side. But after the fall-out of Michael’s initial possession of Dean he'd firmly suggested that if Ketch still wanted to help them, to do so overseas. To follow up on leads in Britain and Europe that they had no way of seeing to themselves. Ketch hadn't argued the point.

Even as Sam was still reeling from the news Dean's distinctive footsteps wandered in from the hallway to the kitchen and up the steps into the library. "Hey, Geek-boy," he said by way of greeting.

Sam startled a little, raising his head from his hands and trying to wipe casually at his face, as if he was just tired. "Hey... Mom turn in?"

Dean took in his brother's posture, the quaver he tried to hide from his voice, the extra moisture on his cheeks as well as his red-rimmed eyes and sighed heavily before plunking one of the tumblers he'd brought with him down in front of Sam, filling it half-full from the bottle of Jack he was also carrying. "You know..." he ventured, taking the seat across from his brother, "you coulda joined us. I know-" he paused, rubbing the back of his neck, "well, you and Dad seemed to have kind of worked some stuff out, but it couldn't have been any easier on you than the rest of us."

Sam shook his head a little, not drinking from the glass, though Dean figured from the look on his face that he really needed it. "Dean... it's not- I mean, yeah, that wasn't easy but that's not why-"

"And look," Dean continued, having noticed the various piles of books, "I know you're all gung-ho to find some special archangel fix-it in all this stuff, but man, you gotta sleep too."

Sam's sigh was almost exasperated, though there was still a slight hitch in it. "Yeah... sleep. Cause THAT'S ever nice and-" his head suddenly tilted and his brows furrowed, as he got that look on his face that Dean had become well accustomed to over their lives. It was the look of his braniac brother fitting seemingly random pieces of information together into something that made sense. "Son-of-a-bitch..."

Dean waited a few moments to see if Sam would continue, but when his brother's expression shifted from dawning comprehension to something distinctly more pained, he spoke up, trying to lighten the mood. "Care to share with the class?"

Sam closed his eyes for a long moment before pushing the pad of paper over to Dean, who swiveled it around to take a look at it. He saw notations of book titles and page numbers, a few lines here and there that didn't make a lot of sense to him out of context, a few lines of symbols that looked to be Enochian and then larger and away from everything else, some numbers that looked like they could be map coordinates. They were heavily circled also. Shooting a questioning look up at Sam, he shrugged. "Are the coordinates for someplace special?"

The taller hunter nodded. "Got a call about a non-violent, restless spirit. She's been appearing sometimes, trying to communicate but apparently that's been difficult because she's deaf." Dean started to get a sinking feeling in his gut, one which only got worse as his brother continued. "But she managed to ask for me. By name. And this is where most of the sightings have been."

Dean didn't keep map coordinates in his head, but even without that, he had a fairly good guess where this was leading. And the clench in his gut only got worse as his brother's behavior began to make sense. "It's Eileen, isn't it?"

"Yeah, probably." Sam was resting his forehead against one of his hands now. "Those are for the area where she was-" he couldn't quite say it, but Dean didn't need him to.

"Well..." he knew nothing could make this situation "okay" but he still wanted to find something to help his brother out with it. "I mean, you said she's not being violent. So, that's good. Maybe she just needs closure or something."

Sam was nodding. "Yeah, that's what I'm hoping too." He straightened up again, seeming to have come to a decision and began to shut down his laptop. "Look, I know there's still a lot to do here, and I don't want you to think I'm ditching-out on you, but I think I need... I mean, she asked for me specifically. I owe her that much."

"Hey, seriously," Dean did his best to reassure his brother, "it's okay. Look, I'm in no shape to drive tonight, but we can get an early start in the morning, and-"

Sam shook his head. "I'm leaving tonight Dean. And it's okay." He pointedly pushed the glass of whiskey back over towards the other Hunter. "I'm fine to make the drive. This should only take a day or two."

Dean blamed the five or so other glasses he'd had already for being a bit slow on the uptake, but when it finally clicked he felt his "Big Brother Warning Bells" going off like crazy. "Wait, hold up. You're NOT just gonna waltz in there alone. If you're that desperate to leave tonight, fine. For this I'll let you drive. But I'm coming with you."

Sam was already shaking his head. "Dean... look. I appreciate it." Dean could tell from his tone that he meant it, "But I need to deal with this alone."

"Sam-"

"No Dean!" A hint of the anger and desperation that he'd seen in his brother's eyes a few nights ago in a parking lot in Iowa was resurfacing as he abruptly rose to his feet, shoving the chair back with legs and almost knocking it over. "This is going to be hard enough as it is. I have to put her to rest, one way or another. And I just had to send our Dad back to the past so he could die like he's supposed to." Dean flinched a little at that. No one had really asked, but he knew that there was no way they would have made their Mom be the one to crush the pearl, and when Sam had set things up to do it himself, he'd honestly been relieved. He wasn't sure if he could have done it either, as much as everyone had understood that it had to happen. But he should have realized it wouldn't have been any easier for Sammy. "And if things get bad with Michael... if I can't find another way in time..." He didn't need to finish that thought for Dean to see where it was going. Not with the promise he'd extracted from both Sam and Cas to put him in the box if things went south.

Dean shook his head and rose, swiftly stepping around the table and over to Sam to rest his hand on his brother's shoulder. "Hey!" He squeezed, wanting to make sure he had his attention. "Hey," he continued a little softer, "I told you I believe in us, Sam, and I do. And I believe in you. I know you're gonna find something. So, don't let that keep hanging over you. But..." his gut twisted a little, his instincts yelling at him to not say this, but he could tell it was important, "if you really need to deal with this alone, that's okay. I'll stay here and..." he made a vague gesture towards the heaps of books on the table.

Sam's eyes widened a little. "Seriously? You're going to do research?"

Dean tried for mock-offended. "Hey, just 'cause I don't usually like to research doesn't mean I can't. I'll have Cas and Jack fill me in on your system here and we'll be all set."

Sam still seemed more than a bit surprised, but he managed a half-smile. "Thanks, Dean. Maybe you'll see something I overlooked." Reaching up to give his brother's hand a squeeze, he then stepped away so he could close-up his laptop and tore the part of the sheet of paper with the coordinates on it off from the rest, folding it up to shove into one of his pockets.

Dean grumbled something under his breath about that last remark as he fished in his own pocket, bringing out the car keys which he tossed to Sam once he'd turned back around. "I don't wanna see a scratch on her, y'hear?"

Again, Sam seemed a bit shocked, but he nodded, giving his brother a tight smile before heading off to his room to get his gear together.

When Sam was out of sight, Dean sagged against the table and shook his head. "Once, just for once couldn't we catch a break?" He wasn't sure who exactly he was asking though, as he was even more sure than ever that Chuck had skipped the universe a while ago. Picking up the glass left on the table, he downed it, welcoming the burn and hoping it would help numb the ache he was feeling for his brother. The kid didn't deserve this. He hadn't deserved to lose a woman that he'd so clearly cared about, and who just as obviously had cared about him. And he definitely didn't deserve to have to be the one to put her to rest. Though, hopefully it wouldn't turn ugly. And maybe... maybe this would give Sam a chance to do what he hadn't been able to before. Maybe now he could say goodbye. Hell, maybe that was what Eileen needed too.

He almost considered taking the bottle of whiskey with him off to his room, but resolutely decided against it, instead leaving it in one of the little corner cabinets next to one of the poofy leather armchairs. He'd been serious when he'd told Sam he'd start looking through this stuff, and making his impending hangover worse wasn't the best way to go about that.

As he wandered back to his room, he scrunched his brows together, realizing he hadn't found out just what exactly Sam's "Eureka moment" had been about.

~0~0~0~0~0~

Back in his room, Sam slid his laptop into his backpack then reached over to the ledge he kept a number of books on, grabbing the one titled "Learning American Sign Language". The pages were well-worn and several slips of paper marked various places in it, but it also had a thin coating of dust on it. It had been some while since he'd picked it up. With a tightness in his throat, he put it in his backpack too. He pretty much always kept a duffel ready with the basics of clothes and whatnot in case he had to head out in a hurry, so it was just a matter of adding a few specific things to it.

Almost ready to go, he paused a moment, his hand hovering over his backpack before finding its way to a smaller pocket on the side. Unzipping it, he gently took out what was inside, sitting down on the bed without really realizing it as his memories drifted back, almost unbidden, to the last time he'd seen her alive.

She'd been crushed over having accidentally killed a human, even a human as douchy as that Renny guy had been. After holding her for a while Sam had gently suggested that she try taking a shower to relax, and that they should all get some sleep. Later that evening, after he'd had his own shower and was reading for a bit he'd heard a low knock at his door. Eileen was there when he'd opened it, the overlarge (on her anyway) flannel he'd lent her the previous day now being worn as a nightshirt. "Sam... I..." her eyes had been downcast, so he'd gently raised her chin with his hand before signing that it was okay. "I just, I don't want to be alone right now."

He'd nodded and pulled her into another hug, softly stroking her still slightly damp hair. They'd slept together that night in the strictly literal sense, Eileen curled up protectively in his arms, and as he'd felt himself slowly drifting off he'd felt that feeling somewhere deep in his chest that he'd always felt when spending time with her, even if it was just face-timing on his phone or computer. It was a feeling that he'd hesitated to define, but right then it was growing, as if it could have filled all of his being. He'd had his share of one-night-stands and random flings, and even though he and Eileen hadn't ever had sex, hadn't even kissed for that matter, he'd known that what he'd felt for her was stronger anything he'd felt for any of those others. He'd known that he would do anything he could for her, known that what he'd wanted most was to protect her. And he'd instinctively known that she was very emotionally vulnerable right then, and pushing her into something physical, something she wasn't really ready for at that point could have truly hurt her.

That thought alone had been enough to keep his libido in check and just appreciate her presence; the feel of her soft warmth pressed against him, the rosemary scent of her shampoo, the slow sounds of her breathing and the way her fingers had slipped under his t-shirt and held onto his side even in sleep. His last thoughts before falling asleep had been wishing there could be more of all that. More of her. More of them. For them to be a "them".

When morning had dawned, her look of gratitude had been enough to reassure him that he'd made the right choice. Though her words telling him of her decision to go back to Ireland had landed like a punch to his gut, but he'd tried to hide his disappointment. She'd seen right through him though, and her expression had grown a little sad. "Not forever. I promise I'll come back. I just... I want a chance to connect with who my parents were, and hiding under the Men-of-Letter's noses might be the safest place for me, since they'll probably be looking for me in the States."

He'd nodded, understanding her reasoning. After a quick breakfast of toast and some eggs that he'd miraculously managed not to burn, he'd helped her carry her things outside to her car, giving her another long hug before she pulled away, but not to leave just yet. She'd spent a few moments looking deeply into his eyes, as if she could fully plumb their depths. "Thank you Sam. For everything." Then she'd surprised him by sliding a hand up to the back of his neck and drawing him down while reaching up on tip-toe, pulling him into a kiss that started out sweet and soft before gaining heat. He'd been a little surprised at first, but definitely not reluctant, and for a few moments that had felt like eternity and yet also entirely too brief, the world around them had seemed to fade away, and all he'd known were her lips and the feel of the two of them pressed as close together as they could have managed to be.

When they'd finally broken off the kiss, she offered him one last, sad smile before wishing him goodbye and to keep himself safe. He'd done the same, waving at her in a bit of a daze as she'd driven off.

Later, when he'd gone back into his room he'd found something she'd clearly left for him on his desk; a lock of her dark brown hair secured with one of those little black hair-ties.

He held it now as he sat there, feeling the softness of it and still catching the faint scent of rosemary. "This is why you visit my dreams sometimes, isn't it?" He murmured softly. "You're tied to that forest, but you're also tied to me through this, and I take it with me whenever I go out on hunts." He found himself having to blink a few times to keep the tears at bay. "Guessing the Bunker's wards keep you away when I'm here though... But I'm coming. I'm sorry... I'm so sorry it took me this long." He couldn't keep his tears from falling this time as his voice broke. "I'll be there soon."

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gomwriting · 5 years

Text

Jerk, Junhoe | Part 5.

Pairing: Junhoe x Hyena (OC)

Type: Slight angst / Childhood friendship / Romance

Word count: 2803

Synopsis: The aftermath of their much needed closure gives both Hyena and Junhoe time to heal, the hurt simply turning into sadness upon seeing each other.

Darkness engulfed the sky, much like it had done to Junhoe’s heart. The thunder echoed with the voice in his mind, the one that was calling him an idiot, a jerk, an asshole, out of many the many other insults to himself. Despite regretting his burst of anger, he was slightly relieved to get it off his chest. With this, he hoped that Hyena would be able to move on from their relationship, even if he couldn’t. It was better that she stayed mad at him forever, wasn’t it?

From then on, Junhoe focused on himself - in a good way that is. He started helping out his uncle at his store doing all the heavy lifting and deliveries, knowing very well that he wasn’t as good of a salesperson as he was a heavy lifter. In an extremely odd way, knowing that Hyena would move on from the darkness that ate him and their friendship made him more motivated as a person. He knew that she would be happier this way and to help her get over their broken relationship faster, he would rush out the class and quickly made his way to his uncle’s store. It hurt him to not be able to face her properly but he deserved it for all the times he rudely ignored her when she tried to reach out to him. He would scoff at himself for being so absorbed in his emotions for her, realising that despite all the hurt she caused him and vice versa, he could never erase his feelings for her.

“Hey Donghyuk, what’s the class doing for the school festival?” Shocked, his classmate dropped the box of cardboard scraps as Junhoe spoke out of nowhere. The taller male hadn’t talked to him since the former quit coming to the community dance classes right after his father passed. Even when they started going to the same high school, Junhoe never approached Donghyuk, the curious boy getting information about his behaviour from Junhoe's childhood friend Hanbin, who was in the high school dance club with him. He always thought that their friendship was genuine back then and so this sudden conversation initiated by Junhoe warmed his heart a little.

The boy’s eyes widened as he saw how Junhoe bent down to pick up the scraps and put them back in the box, an initiative move on his behalf. After a pause, the nostalgic stricken Donghyuk could only stutter out a, “We-we’re doing a maid and butler cafe.”

“Okay… And why?” Junhoe’s eyebrows furrowed as he absorbed the information, having not participated in any school festival ever. With the now filled box in his hands, Donghyuk began walking with Junhoe following behind him as he explained, “Well the girls really liked the idea when uhm… Hyena suggested it.”

Junhoe nodded at him to continue, trying to keep a straight face knowing full well how his old friend was trying to be wary of his words despite not know why or how he knew about Hyena and him. Donghyuk shifted his gaze to peak into the classroom, letting out a sigh of relief when he noticed that all the girls weren’t there before he continued, “And then Yuna suggested that the guys could dress up as butlers so it would be ‘fair’. We also don’t have much space in the class so we decided to make it up for it by selling real baked goods and drinks like macarons and tea and stuff.”

Checking to see if Junhoe was paying attention, Donghyuk placed the box on the floor and proceeded to pull out a note that instructed him to arrange the cardboard scraps to make the words ‘CAFE 2-3’, Junhoe’s hands automatically pulling the scraps out of the box in an offer to help as soon as he read the note. Although looking distant, Junhoe was aware of the murmurs from the handful of guys around him as he helped Donghyuk and in an attempt to break the awkwardness he continued their conversation, “So who’s making all that real food and drinks?”

With a smile, Donghyuk replied, “Half of the girls and some of the guys are experimenting and designing the menu right now actually. The rest of the girls are tailoring the outfits that are going to be used for the festival. Everyone’s pretty excited about it.”

Junhoe felt nervousness rise in his stomach as he prepared himself for his next line, clearing his throat before he said, “Could I… Become a butler too?”

“Seriously?” Donghyuk’s eyes widened as he saw real emotions cross Junhoe’s face, an expression filled with worry and optimism. It was so interesting for him to not see and feel an ounce of arrogance or pride in his friend’s tone. Nodding with enthusiasm, Donghyuk waved for one of the guys in the class to come over with the measuring tape, quickly getting his old friend to stand up and take his measurements before he thinks twice about his involvement.

“What made you want to do this though?” Trying to be careful with his words yet trying to ask an important question was really difficult for Donghyuk, the boy not used to such upfront confrontation. Unable to tell his old friend in front of so many people that he’d decided to live his life without grudges, Junhoe looked him in the eye as he shrugged and answered, “Figured it was about time I stopped being an ass.”

Bursting out laughing, Donghyuk looked around the classroom to see the other guys smile oddly at Junhoe, his comparably gentler words and actions making him seem like a completely different person. Noticing how they were all looking at him who was standing in the middle of the class and getting himself measured, Junhoe decided to say one more thing, “Could you guys maybe not tell Hyena that I’m helping out? Well, she wouldn’t want to hear that anyway.”

For the first time ever, he made the effort to turn around and face all of them, recognising and trying to remember the faces of his classmates who meant nothing to him before, unsure of his own intentions in doing so. When he turned to face Donghyuk, he was surprised to find his friend smirking to himself, the boy responding to Junhoe, “And how do you know she doesn’t want to hear that?”

“Trust me, she doesn’t. So don’t,” With a firmer voice, Junhoe hoped this would help prevent them from crossing paths any time soon, their wounds far too big to be patched up at the moment. He had hoped that this would be another way to distract himself since working at his uncle’s store just didn’t seem enough to stop him from thinking about Hyena.

And so the preparations for the school festival began, Hyena and Junhoe going about preparing for the class cafe in their own little ways, unknowing of what the other was doing. They both took a step forward in their recovery and despite the wounds in their hearts, the laughter of their classmates brought a temporary fulfillment in a void that might not heal.

“Finally!!” Hyena was engulfed in a hug as soon as her friend broke through the crowd of people. Hanbin laughed loudly as he gave Yumi a pat on her back, the girl panting from running. Her friend’s unique red girl’s school uniform shone brightly among the crowd and people were glancing their way, trying not to make it obvious.

“Okay, let's go to your class first and then we’ll go to Hanbin’s class and then Jinhwan oppa and Miso unnie’s class and then we’ll take a photo together and then -” Hanbin slung his arm over Yumi’s shoulder and cupped his hand over her mouth to keep her from talking, quickly interjecting as he brought her face close to his, “Or you don’t have to drag anyone anywhere and just enjoy it with me for the time being. The others are busy anyway.”

With a laugh, Hyena gave Yumi’s hand a squeeze and quickly excused herself, telling her to come over to her class a bit before her break at noon. She looked over her shoulder, her heart warm at the view of Hanbin and Yumi laughing loudly together, the two being best friends for too long to be just friends. The look in Hanbin’s eyes told her everything. Somehow, Hyena felt jealous. With their circumstances, the two had always been able to be open with each other, something Junhoe and her couldn’t achieve since they were little.

Pushing the thought away, Hyena went back to her class, surprised to find a long line spilling out from the entrance. She passed through the people after much trouble and her eyes immediately widened at the sight before her. Junhoe, who she hadn't seen in close to a month, was in a tailored butler outfit. It wasn’t just any outfit though, since Hyena distinctly remembered stitching that little rose patch on the right breast pocket of the outfit exclusively for her good friend Donghyuk.

It took Hyena off-guard seeing him smile at the girls he was serving, a wide toothy grin that was dazzling in its own special way. She felt her heart prick at the sight and she slowly made her way to the food preparation area of the classroom which was cordoned off with floor to ceiling curtains. Instinctively, she clutched the fabric of her outfit and closed her eyes for a moment, waiting until her felt herself calm down.

“So I guess you saw him?” Hyena looked up and a smiling Donghyuk greeted her, the boy arranging macarons and biscuits nicely on a plate. She let out an exasperated sigh and sat down on a chair near him as she said, barely above a whisper, “Why is he wearing your outfit?”

“He wanted to be a part of it so I just gave his measurements as mine. No biggie,” As he passed the plate to Yuna who came in, the said girl looked over at Hyena and perked up, “Oh! Must be time for my break!”

Before she could protest, Yuna pushed the plate into Hyena’s hands and pulled on her wrist to drag her outside, quickly telling her which table to give it to before waving goodbye as she left the classroom. The group of guys in the corner looked unamused as she approached and she cursed herself for having a hand in deciding the ‘you take their order, you serve them’ rule the class voted for. Despite being worried, Hyena walked over to the table and presented the plate to them, giving them a big smile as she did so.

“Hey, you aren’t Song Yuna. You think we customers are a joke or something?” As one of the guys said this, he pushed the plate off the table, the sound of the plate breaking enough to hush the crowd in the classroom.

“I’m sorry but Yuna had matters to attend to so she wasn’t able to finish all her duties,” Bowing slightly to them, Hyena took in a deep breath as the group of guys proceeded to laugh her.

“Well, can’t be helped. You’ll just have to go around with us to make up for it, maybe?” Their cackling laughter was becoming extremely annoying and Hyena looked up at them, ready to say something back.

“If you aren’t satisfied with our service you could fill out the feedback form we have,” She looked up at Junhoe who suddenly stepped in front of her waving a feedback form in the faces of the three guys. His voice was unexpectedly polite and neutral while his expression was pleasant and genuine, shocking Hyena.

Looking around the now quiet classroom, the three guys realised how embarrassing they must’ve looked and quickly got up to leave the classroom, giving Junhoe and Hyena rotten expressions as they left. The quiet of the classroom soon disappeared and along came bustling chatter and hushed whispers. Despite that, Junhoe didn't even spare a look at Hyena and proceeded to do the rest of his duties.

“I didn’t know Koo Junhoe was that cool.” Said one girl to her friend as Hyena took their order.

“He’s a good fighter and he stands up for women? What a combo,” Said another as Hyena picked up dishes on their table from the previous customers.

“Having a bad boy in class must be quite exciting huh?” One girl asked Hyena directly as she was trying to take her order.

Deciding that she won’t have it, Hyena walked back to the preparation room after serving a final customer and managed to get another girl to replace her for a while, knowing that Junhoe’s shift would end soon and she just didn’t want to see or hear about him for now. She then hid herself in another sectioned off area which acted like a break room. The class created it with the intention of giving those who needed a short break a space in the class rather than outside where everyone was enjoying the festival.

“You okay in there?” Donghyuk said as he peeked from behind the curtain that separated the preparation room from the break room. Hyena nodded in response, knowing her voice would only betray her if she tried. He moved from behind the curtain and walked towards her, handing her a plate of colourful macarons as he grinned, “I’m hoping the bright colours might bring out a brighter expression from you.”

She couldn’t help but laugh as he said this, thankful that her friend was always understanding of her feelings, unlike someone. As she took a bite out of a red macaron, the curtain parted and a voice said, “Hey Donghyuk we should… go.”

Junhoe’s eyes reached hers and before he felt the heat rise to his ears he directed his gaze to Donghyuk and continued, “Uh, I’ll just be waiting outside.”

He left as quickly as he entered, Hyena realising that she hadn’t blinked since he came and looked over at Donghyuk, blinking up at him. With a sheepish smile, Donghyuk was about to explain himself before she interjected, her voice sounding slightly sad, “I hate how he looks so good in the outfit I made.”

“Go and make him happy, please,” She smiled at Donghyuk, a genuine yet pained smile that showed she cared more for him than she let on. He could only give her a thumbs up and a nod in return, unsure of how to answer her.

Sighing, Hyena thought about how their closure had really helped diminished the anger she thought she had for Junhoe, something that was not surprising since she knew she still cared for him. She was thankful to be given the chance to let out her rage, knowing full well that despite all the trouble they caused for each other, she was loyal to her feelings for him, truly believing that Junhoe’s true feelings was somewhere behind his hard exterior.

She was pulled out from her thoughts when the curtain was pulled away, her classmate informing her that it was already Hyena’s break time, the girl checking the time on her phone before thanking her classmate for letting her know. Looking around the corridor as she stepped out of the classroom, Hyena kept a lookout for the eye catching red uniform and clutched her phone in her hand out of nervousness. She hadn’t talked to Yumi properly since she came back and she wanted to know everything that has been going on in her friends life.

“Sorry to keep you waiting!” As Miso and Yumi brisk walked towards her, Hyena couldn’t help the smile that formed on her face from seeing them together. Yumi grabbed each of their hands and looked up at them, a gleeful look in her eye as she said, “The three blind mice are together again!”

Feeling some kind of a soft sadness inside her, Hyena pulled the two into a group hug and gave them the tightest squeeze she could manage. Jokingly, Yumi let out a laugh and said, "Okay, don't squeeze the air out of us please."

When Yumi saw how Hyena wiped away a small tear that appeared at the corner of her eye, she immediately softened and gave the slightly taller girl a pat on the shoulder as she said, "You've been through a lot since you came back haven't you?"

"Let's not focus on that for today! I just want to have fun with my closest friends," Thinking about how her old friend still had the brightest smile she'd ever seen, Yumi turned to look at Miso and they both nodded in agreement at Hyena's simple request.

Unbeknownst to the girls, fate had other plans for the next hour that included more than just the three of them.

7 notes · View notes