#tech-o megatron

[jaysdoodlehell]

Some more character concepts for Tech-O AU in blue and black ink :3

[bones4thecats]

TFP Ratchet x Fembot reader, where on Cybertron they both had a sparkling, but when the war started the Sparkling was taken away from them along with other Sparklings to train them for war, on earth the reader is pregnant, and when the episode where Bee are taken away from her C-cogs, Ratchet wants to give him his, but when Bee goes on the mission, and Ratchet goes for him, the Reader ends up telling why Ratchet wants to save Bee, since their Sparkling died in Ratchet's arms due to a Decepticon attack in the war from Cybertron. , Ratchet had to try to save his son in the infirmary only for him to die due to lack of energy, Ratchet still blames himself for his death same as the reader

TFP! Ratchet and S/O w/ Deceased Child

Character: Ratchet (Transformers Prime) Requester: @zinnia1506 A/N: This was so much fun to write. I love this guy so much!! By the way, the ending may be a hint rushed, but I need to start planning for my Q&A here soon. I also know the titles kinda clunky, but I tried making it sound good. Anyways, enjoy!!! ⚠️ Trigger Warnings for: Mentions of war, death, human organs (like once, not even that descriptive), and loss of a child ⚠️

╔══════════════════════════════════════════╗

╚═════ Ratchet ═══════════════════════════════╝

⚕️ As the Decepticons neared their goal day by day, you grew more and more worried for your sparkmate's stability. He hadn't been recharging as much as he should and the amount of injuries coming in certainly weren't helping any

⚕️ You were helping Ratchet out in the med-bay when you heard Bulkhead come inside while Bumblebee... walked? Why wasn't he in his vehicle mode instead?

"Bumblebee, Bulkhead? What's wrong?" You asked, making Ratchet look up from the screen and cock an optical ridge like you.

"Bee said he couldn't roll out. I don't know what's wrong with him."

⚕️ Looking from the large green-mech, you looked at the young yellow one and nodded, motioning for him to take a step onto the metal 'bed' for him to lay on for a scanning

⚕️ You were concerned as Optimus stood beside you, resting a servo on your shoulder pad and attempted to keep you from bursting with emotions. He understood why you were acting more worried than ever

"You can fix Bee, can't you?" Rafael asked, looking up at the medical bot with a matching concerned face.

"Bumblebee was hit pretty hard. The stun-blast may have fried his T-Cog." He answered, resuming with another scan.

"Is that like a T-Bone?" Miko asked.

"Not exactly. It's the organ that allows us to scan vehicles and transform." Arcee answered while you busied yourself making sure nothing was outwardly wrong with Bee.

⚕️ The beeping of results coming in made you all look up at the screens behind Ratchet, and you pat Optimus' servo with yours to reassure him you were fine, allowing him to nod and take it back to his side

"By the Allspark..." Ratchet began, "Bumblebee's T-Cog isn't damaged. It's missing."

"But the Decepticons transform too. Why would they steal that?" Jack asked, saying what you all were thinking.

"Megatron may be known to raise zombies but he's no ghoul."

"If Megatron wasn't behind this... then who was?" Raf asked again.

⚕️ As you began to wonder just who, any Decepticon, or even a rogue Autobot would do such a thing for greed, Bulkhead gave you the one group you wouldn't think of

"The ones who cannibalized Breakdown."

"And tried to gut me." Arcee added.

"M.E.C.H. And it would appear their knowledge of Cybertronian bio-tech has grown sophisticated."

"But why would they want Bumblebee's part?" The youngest human once again pried, being followed by Bumblebee's impaired beeping he used for speech.

⚕️ As Bumblebee stood and began to walk away, Optimus moved slightly from your side and laid a servo on his chest plate, making him stop walking forward like he once planned

"Bumblebee, please. You are not presently equipped to handle this." He said, making the youth bleep back at him.

"You are mistaken, my friend. I do know what it's like to lose a vital part of ones self. And, as a result, I know the value of putting ones faith in the strength of those around you. We vow to do everything in our power to make you whole again."

"And if not, Ratchet can just make you a new Cog-thing, right?" Miko asked.

⚕️ You could feel the frustration radiating off of Bumblebee as he groaned glitchily and sat back down on the berth, his helm in his servos

"What'd I say?"

"Miko, a T-Cog is a bio-mechanism not a scrapyard find. If it were that easy, don't you think I would've replaced Bumblebee's voice box by now."

⚕️ You made your voice known among the others as you replied with your own response

"Losing a T-Cog is like you humans losing your liver. You cannot just make a new one from scrap after losing it and put it inside you like nothing ever happened."

⚕️ Bee's beeping became more erratic as he spoke, making Raf step forward and begin trying to make the mech's mood lighten up a bit. After all, he was still the same adorable Cybertronian without such an important part of his biology. Unfortunately, Bee was having none of it and began moping heavier by the second

⚕️ As the others spoke of ideas for helping out Bee, you just hoped this nightmare would be over soon

»–•–«

⚕️ Everyone in the base could tell that Bumblebee was beginning to lose his patience, he had been far more snappy and acting like how Miko would call it, 'a typical earthly-teenager' would, which only upset the bot more

⚕️ You noticed how protective Ratchet had grown towards Bee when he tried leaving for a 'walk'. And while normally you would just sigh and chuckle at the actions, this time, you saw how deeply this was hurting Ratchet and Bee. Bee was hurting for more obvious reasons, but Ratchet was one only you and Optimus knew about

⚕️ And after the... predicament with Ratchet being unconscious while the rest of the group, minus Bumblebee, you, and the kids, went off to find an Iacon relic, everyone was shocked when he yelled about Bee going off on his own

⚕️ It was only days after Bee's T-Cog got repaired after being blown to near-scrap by Starscream that the kids asked you why Ratchet seemingly lost himself worrying after Bee

⚕️ You currently had the three kids in your alt mode, an Koenigsegg CCR, and were telling them a short story of your first day on their home planet, making them laugh at how oblivious you once were

"Hey Y/N, can I ask you something personal?" Raf asked, shifting nervously in the passenger seat while Miko took her headphones out and sat up to listen.

"Go right on ahead, kiddo."

"Ratchet cares about the team, and I know that! But, why did he seem so much more- protective over Bee while his T-Cog was gone?"

"Yeah! He acted like he was Bee's dad or something!" Miko chirped in.

"Miko!" Jack yelled.

"It's alright, Jack. I suppose you kids should know since you're practically members of our small family." You began, making the two boys and girl look at your radio with curiosity.

⚕️ You shook off any feeling of nervousness and began to speak your story, radiating everything off of your spark, allowing the kids to back out of hearing the tragedy any time

"Back on Cybertron, there were two Cybertronians. And in a similar way you humans do, they had a what you call 'child'. The two were very happy to bring such a cute and valuable part of their kind into the universe. And, swearing on their sparks, they would make sure they lived a happy life."

⚕️ Raf could hear your voice drop at the mention of a 'happy life' and so, in an effort to save you some pain, he finished your sentence

"And then the war broke out... right?"

"Yeah... the carrier, or mother in your terms, had taught him how to fight whilst the sire, or father, taught him how to heal himself and others if the time came. And it did, unfortunately."

⚕️ Flashbacks of watching an orange and white mech teaching a smaller, and more fragile one, how to weld an injury together began to come back to you, making you slow down more while driving

"While they tried their best to keep their child out of any major danger, when the Decepticons launched an attack on the building they were staged in, he ended up getting severely wounded, to the point where it took nearly ten medics and doctors to help the large number of harmed members heal quick enough for a rebuttal."

⚕️ Jack looked down while Miko looked visibly saddened and Raf tried to stay calm as you continued

"The father Cybertronian had tried healing the young one, attempting to close up any major wound until he could receive proper treatment... but that... didn't work that well."

"I'm gonna guess that the father Cybertronian was Ratchet and the mother was you, right Y/N?" Jack asked.

"You'd be correct. Ever since the day that Ratchet and I lost him, I couldn't stand the mere mention of his name."

"What was his name?" Miko asked kindly, attempted to sound far less curious then she was.

"We named him Ultrasound. Since he seemingly could hear so much more than he should have when he was young." You said, a small laugh coming from you and the kids.

"Hey Y/N... do you think Ratchet sees Ultrasound in Bumblebee?" Raf asked.

"It's quite possible. I see him inside him as well. The way he pouted reminded me of when Ratchet would tell Ultra to go to his quarters because he did something bad. I believe that Ratchet does see our offspring in Bumblebee, though, you may need to ask him yourself." You finished, before telling them it was time to get them home for the night.

⚕️ They all nodded and sat patiently as you began to drive them home, dropping off Jack, then Miko, and finally Raf off at their homes

⚕️ But, before Raf went inside and probably to bed, he looked at your radio again and said something that would stay with you until the end of your time living

"I think Ultrasound is always with you, like what my mother always told me. Someone isn't fully gone, there's always a part of them with you. Whether it be in your heart, or I guess spark for you guys, or in your memories."

⚕️ You hummed and giggled at Raf's maturity before opening your door for him to get inside his home

"Thank you for the advice, oh wise Rafael. Now, get in your home. Your mother's probably worried."

"No problem, and thanks again Y/N. You must've been a great parent."

⚕️ You were shocked as he stepped out and ran into his house to speak to his mother about why he was slightly late home, he was probably going to say that his friend needed some help understanding some homework

⚕️ Once you arrived back at the base and looked at your sparkmate working away, the memory of him holding Ultrasound in his arms, smiling down at the newly-made Cybertronian, made you give a matching one and walk up to hug him

⚕️ Ratchet looked at you and smiled, wrapping an arm around your back, pulling you into his grasp. Oh he wished this war would be over so you both could live once again like normal beings and not helpers in such a violent time

"I love you, Ratchet."

"I love you too, Y/N."

[blueikeproductions]

Regulon originally was a competitive rival to Orion Pax on Cybertron before the Great War. Both worked jobs in the mines, trying to see who could mine the most Energon and also compete against each other in various sports like Cube or Lob-Ball. When the Great War against the Autobots and Decepticons broke out, the third major war in vorns, Orion was passed the Matrix and became Optimus Prime, but he and Regulon began drifting apart.

Regulon became jealous he wasn’t leader, due to being better, if by a smidge, than Orion and felt he was robbed of an opportunity. Regulon also wasn’t sure if Optimus was capable of getting the job done due to the Autobots’ mounting losses and inability to break beyond a stalemate. When Optimus and Megatron left for Earth but never returned, Regulon felt a sense of betrayal, thinking Optimus abandoned them all to live on another planet. It seemed for a while, in the confusion, both factions were content to lay down arms and start over, with Regulon leading a reconstruction effort for a few years, but a massive bombing at Cybertropolis reignited the war, as Megaplex, Megatron’s Clone he had created to take over should something happen, rallied most of the disgruntled Decepticons to finish what they started, killing off Shotimus Prime, a stand in Optimus had appointed before leaving.

With no other options with Megaplex’s big push, the Autobots had to seek aid from the war ready Ammonites from Stentaria, with Regulon appointing himself leader after acquiring the Magnus Hammer from an old lost vault, an ancient symbol of leadership that predates the Matrix. Upgraded with Ammonite tech, and repurposing the headless body of Amazonus Prime, an early Prime after the Thirteen left Cybertron, Regulon renamed himself Regulus Magnus and became a Headmaster, abandoning his original wolf shell. He was a far more ruthless leader, having no sympathy for any Decepticon who crawled back to the war under Megaplex, having decommissioned Guardian Robots refitted and reactivated to mow down any camps or holes the Decepticons would lurk under.

The war paused when both sides got a strange signal from Earth that had the energy signature of the ancient Quintus Prime, Hashtag’s internet pulse wave, forcing Regulus and Megaplex to travel to Earth aboard ships to see what was going on, and to hopefully obtain the lost Allspark, bare minimum.

The Ammonite Autobots arrived first, chasing off Team Starscream’s pathetic ambush attempt, with Regulus, Tanker, Chemico, Wheelie, Gnaw and Mentlar stunned at the existence of the Terrans but appalled Megatron not only was still alive but an Autobot now too.

The other Anmonite Autobots took a shine to the Maltos and Witwiccans (Mentlar befriended Nightshade and Landhammer, Tanker did with Abhorrous and Jawbreaker, etc) but Regulus struggled with the situation. He refused to believe Megatron turned over a new leaf and clung to the idea Optimus abandoned them all to live a new life on Earth. Overtime, Regulus did begin to change his tune on Optimus, finally realizing the hard choices and sacrifices he had to make after witnessing Prime and new GHOST head Schloder trying to negotiate with Witwicky’s insufferable mayor Shawn Berger. Regulus was more than happy to tell Berger where to shove it when the corrupt mayor turned his attention to their new visitor. (Post conflict, when Dot and Alex became liaisons to the new mayor, Gabriella Constanza, Regulus saw to it Berger and other difficult antagonistic humans worked in waste management on the most unflattering part of Terratronus’ city mode.)

Regulus did begin to acknowledge Megatron changed when he saw the ex-Decepticon completely annihilate his old self in Megaplex following the Decepticons’ final push on Earth when the Clone leader’s own crew arrived.

Regulus helped issue a signal to Cybertron with Hashtag, making it clear alongside Optimus, Megatron now Galvatron, the Maltobots and Witwiccans that the war was over and any Decepticon or Autobot that thought otherwise will answer to them. The sheepish Cybertron Transformers officially began rebuilding again with GHOST operatives and some Ammonite Autobots going to Cybertron to help oversee the operation.

Starscream’s unit didn’t get the memo tho, and after Starscream upgraded with the Cyber Sleeves also, remained the main Decepticon presence until series end working with the Quintessons and later Dark Nova.

Regulus remained on Earth, his friendly rivalry with Optimus re-emerging as he helped defend Earth from the invading Quintessons who also picked up Hashtag’s early pulse wave, and Quintus Prime’s old apprentice, the Prime of Anti-Life Dark Nova.

The Allspark has been claimed by Dark Nova, who found it drifting in space after the Autobots chucked it off Earth during the 2000’s. It was Regulus Magnus, now whittled down to Regulon, that managed to wrench the Allspark free with a mighty swing of the Magnus Hammer.

When Optimus inherited Quintus’ power, Regulus wasn’t jealous this time, acknowledging Optimus and even Megatron were the true inheritors of the legendary power.

[iliterallydecepticanteven]

Hey y'all remember Eat Shit & Live, Blitzwing? Y'all want a fun short thing I churned out that takes place sometime after that fic? Here you go! Punched out while waiting for my nails to dry and not spellchecked or proofread at all, have fun!

💜

The day is cool, a soft breeze wafting off the lake and the sun peeking out from scattered clouds. Alexandria had babbled the entire car ride, insistently pointing out the window and shouting, “Cloud! Cloud, mommy!” 

Emily had just replied that yes, that was a cloud. When they neared the air base, she started shouting out other things she saw, like planes and helicopters. She shouts an enthusiastic greeting at the guard who checks Emily’s ID when they arrive at the gates of the base. 

When she’s finally released from the confines of her carseat, she jumps up and down excitedly, already knowing what their little trip entailed. 

“Hand, hand, give me your hand!” Emily shouts, chasing after her daughter who is practically skipping towards one of the hangars. She finally slows down and grabs the outstretched hand, but continues to bounce up and down as they walk into the hangar. 

It was a newer building, built for use by Decepticons. Much higher than those used to house military and passenger planes. They walk past the massive desks and chairs towards the back, where there’s an elevator. It takes them up to an upper level filled with human sized desks and chairs, at perfect eye-level with Cybertronians. 

“Bitz! Bitz!” Alexandria starts shouting, looking down at the hangar. 

“He’s coming! Calm down, honey,” Emily says as she drops her purse on a desk. 

“Bitz and Lug-ug?” Alexandria asks. She takes an offered stuffed elephant from her mom. 

“Yes, they both should be here,” Emily replies as she sits in a chair. She checks her phone as Alexandria runs about, looking around the office space. The barrier between the work area and the drop into the hangar is solid thick plexiglass that comes up to Emily’s chest with no gaps, breaks, or small spaces a kid could squeeze into. The triple reinforcement also means that Alexandria is able to push her whole body against it without it so much as budging. 

Various work emails talking about changing the shift schedules and overhauling the tech in the tower to be able to better communicate with the Decepticons. She’s punching out response when she hears the large door of the hangar whining open. 

Emily gets up, standing next to Alexandria as she squeals and bounces. The most interesting thing Emily had experienced from being around Cybertronians was their smell. Those that flew smelled like ozone and burning metal and something she couldn’t quite put her finger on but was this faint chemical smell. Those that drove smelled of dirt and burnt carbon and that faint chemical smell as well. 

The smell of burning ozone drifts over before Blitzwing comes into view, his calm face smiling at them before snapping to his jack-o-lantern one. He cackles excitedly as he approaches, Alexandria jumping up and down in excitement as he approaches. 

“Hello, hello, hello! How are you little one?” he laughs as he stands right next to the barrier. 

“Bitz! Bitz!” Alexandria shrieks. “Mommy, up please, please up!” 

Emily reaches down and hoists her daughter into her arms, just high enough to rest her tiny hands on the edge of the plexiglass. She looks over to watch as Lugnut walks in the hangar as well, clawed hands holding a stack of metal rectangles. Megatron steps in a moment later, instantly drawn to the commotion. 

“Your sparkling is growing well,” he comments as Emily sets Alexandria down to run along the edge of the plexiglass. 

“Oh yeah. She went through a growth spurt recently and completely outgrew a bunch of clothes,” Emily replies. She knows that this likely means nothing to him, given the major difference of species and societies, but he and the other Decepticons she interacted with regularly appreciated the updates regardless. 

“Out of curiosity, what do you feed human offspring that young?” he asks. She’s running up and down the length of the plexiglass, Blitzwing following her with his gaze. 

“Same food I eat, organic stuff, just mashed down or cut up so she doesn’t choke on it,” she replies. “She’s loving white cheddar cheese right now. She’d eat a whole block if we let her.” 

Emily thinks for a moment before asking, “What do yours eat?” 

“Specialized formulations of energon, made to have more minerals and easier for the tanks to digest,” Megatron replies. “As we age, our fuel tanks can handle less processed energon. I could eat raw energon crystals and be perfectly fine.” 

“Wow,” she says. Lugnut has since walked over to wave at Alexandria. 

“You grow stronger every time we see you, tiny puny human!” Lugnut shouts. Alexandria squeals in response and jumps up and down. 

“Heard the Autobots might re-enter the picture,” Emily says, looking over at Megatron. 

“Discussions are occurring,” he admits. “For the obvious reason of not wanting to share the energon crystals popping up, I’m not impartial to it. However, Governor Nakamura is the one making the final calls in regards to who does and does not aid in protecting this state from the Quintessons threat.” 

“She’s not talking to the ones who bailed, right?’ Emily asks. 

Megatron chuckles. “Of course not. She is, although, talking to the only Autobot who has ever bested me in battle.” 

“Optimus?” Emily asks. 

Megatron nods, slowly and reverently. “Correct.” 

Emily pauses for a moment, thinking. “He wasn’t the one to pull Autobots out of Michigan when the Quintessons attacked?” 

“Of course not. He loves this stupid mudball too much to even think about leaving it defenseless.” 

“Then who made the call?” Emily asks. 

“The Autobot government is run by various bots, all assembled into one unit known as The Autobot High Council. In the absence of the Magnus, who is the highest leader to the Autobots, the Council can make a decision without their input, so long as they have a two-thirds majority vote.” Megatron pauses, glancing over to gauge Emily’s reaction. “From my understanding, Optimus Prime, now the Magnus of the Autobots, was dispatched to the planet of Nebulos to aid in clean up and recovery of Quintesson attacks. He could not be reached by the Council when the attack on Earth began. And thus, the Council unanimously voted to pull all Autobots and Autobots forces off of Earth, leaving you with only your military forces to fight back the surprise attack.” 

Emily’s jaw drops. “I’m sorry, unanimously?” 

Megatron nods. “Perhaps there was one bot who voted against it. But my current understanding is everyone who was present voted to abandon your planet.” 

Emily opens her mouth to say something but loses the words. She rubs at her face and mutters, “Fuck.” 

“I can assure you though that Optimus does respect your planet and, so long as there is no additional meddling from the fools running his faction, he won’t turn and run,” Megatron says. “Honestly, even if the Council told him to turn and run he wouldn’t. He’s quite stubborn.” 

Emily just nods in response, looking at Alexandria, watching as she holds her stuffed elephant up to them and babbles about it. She remembers the day the Quintessons attacked. Everyone in Detroit, even the whole state, remembered. She remembered the fear that gripped her tight and every horrible scenario that ran through her head. To think that it could have all been avoided if a bunch of alien robots on a completely different planet hadn’t made the call to abandon them. 

It didn’t make the Decepticons better, per se, as she also remembers the Battle of Detroit. But the difference was they were here, fulfilling their end of a contract, and not turning tail at the sight of danger. Hell, some of them were even nice enough to take time out of the day to make faces at her toddler and ask about her development. 

Megatron breaks the silence, saying, “Regardless of how their plan pans out, I can assure you everything is going well on our side. You, and the rest of your gross species, will be allowed to continue to live in safety.” 

Despite his words, Emily can’t hear any malice in Megatron's voice. She snorts, “Thanks.” 

“You’re welcome,” he replies with a wry smile. 

[dreamystar-fag]

F/O sexuality and gender HCS because it's pride month and I'm bored

O.R.C.A: Pansexual and computer gender (is that a thing?) with it/tech pronouns

Soldier: Bisexual (doesn't use the label, the only label that applies to him is AMERICAN 🦅🦅🦅🇺🇸🔥🔥🔥)

Tang: Gay and poly

Megatron: Also gay, G1 might be bisexual (good for him)

[transformers-mosaic]

Transformers: Mosaic #651 - "A Modem Of Value"

Originally posted on June 9th, 2012

Story - Rob Queen Art - Koen Luyten Colours - Philip Knott Letters - HdE

deviantART | Seibertron | TFW2005 | BotTalk

wada sez: Chop Shop was characterised as a scavenger and kleptomaniac in his original Tech Specs. Many of the items on Chop Shop’s shelves are a little hard to make out, but they include ships from various sci-fi franchises, possibly a red Seeker of some kind, a Soundwave, a photo of Megatron, an Xbox, and a Grendizer way down in the bottom-left. A “samoflange” is a component of the ThunderTank from ThunderCats, which gained infamy online after a blooper track from the show made it online wherein Lion-O exclaims, “What the fuck is a samoflange?” There was a minor lettering touch-up to this one after its publication; you can see the original version, which has a few little errors, below.

[iholli]

Hi hi!! How about 💭 first meeting, 💌 first confession and 💋 first kiss for whoever you'd like?

hi Ghosty !! thank you sm for the ask !!! 💖💖

💭 first meeting: how did you and your f/o meet for the first time?

oh this is a fun one and as I've been developing lore it's probably been my favorite story hehe 💖

RTE is a warrior and a harbinger of chaos, but they're also a scavenger! specifically, after battles they pick through the scrap for any potentially still useful parts or tech, and if they're lucky they find something the enemy left behind!

so it was a pretty big deal to find a badly damaged, but still intact enemy drone... with, much to RTE's surprise, a faint Spark. even aside from how much intel the drone could provide, RTE couldn't process the thought of abandoning something with a life signal, so they just sort of. paraded it back home, told Megatron and Starscream "I'm keeping this," and that was that LMAO. none of them could have fathomed the drone would end up becoming Blitzwing!

💌 first confession: who confessed first? how did it happen?

Blitzwing!

when you spend all your time around someone from a different culture of course you want to ask questions! it was a few years into repairs (I cannot overemphasize. it took a LONG time to get him properly functional. but a few years means practically nothing to Transformers) and they were both Catching Feelings™ (not a common occurrence for bots so there's a lot of. odd confusion going on). Blitzwing asked about how relationships worked among Decepticons and it circled around to "but how do you know if you want someone to be your conjunx?" RTE settled for "I guess you just know, and you want to tell them, and doing so is more important than your reputation or vulnerability."

as you can guess, Blitzwing wanted to tell them, and it was really important!

💋 first kiss: when, where, and how did your first kiss happen? who initiated it?

oh it was not the most romantic thing, but it was long overdue! Blitzwing was finally doing well enough to get his Protoform (thanks to RTE using Starscream's favor towards them) and it was like meeting each other for the first time all over again. you know how long distance couples meet in an airport? it was like that. RTE initiated cause well. they have to 😂😂 their face is just a screen and they have to split it to use their real maw for anything hahaha.

fortunately Knockout was the only other 'con in the room at that moment, and he understands. 💖

[ppnuggie]

　　　　TFP x reader

　　　『　megatron ,, starscream ,, dreadwing ,, breakdown ,, ratchet ,, wheeljack ,, gender neutral human reader 』　

　　-> gn human s/o who uses snapchat filters on the bots

　　— sfw ,, crack ,, fluff

　　— some hcs of this bc it popped into my head 😵‍💫😵‍💫

　　ratchet ::

• bro dont give two fucks about your silly little filters ,, the only time he does is when miko and your’s laughter becomes too annoying for him

• he demands to know what it is that’s so funny !! why are you laughing at him ?? hes super confused ,, frustrated ,, and angry

• not until you show the picture of him w/ a bald head does he know the cause ,, hes very angry about this ,, what made you think this was okay ??

• he just sighs and goes back to work ,, not bothering to humor the two of you anymore

• though when he catches word that you used a filter on optimus and he got saddened by it ,, you bet he’ll be on your ass about it

• prepare for long scolding session 😵‍💫😵‍💫

　　wheeljack ::

• he loves the filters ,, only when theyre not being used on him

• he’s a bad influence ,, and always convinces you and miko to use the filters on ratchet and ultra magnus ,, when you do the three of you are laughing like hyenas

• he does cover up for you two when magnus asks about the commotion ,, and hopefully he hadn’t seen the picture

• sometimes the filters work on bulkhead ,, so he asks to two of you to use some of the good ones on them ,, but being the little sly devils you are

• the said picture of wheeljack and bulkhead having hearts above their helms turns into them having broccoli heads

• ya’ll are quick to hurry and send it to raf and jack before wheeljack makes you delete it

　　megatron ::

• as a decepticon hostage ,, its easy for you to use the filters on whoever ,, an unsuspecting vehicon ,, maybe knockout ,, and very many times one starscream

• megatron does become amused at this technology ,, his race may be vastly superior and more high-tech then yours ,, but theyve never come up with something as silly as these filters

• always gives a small chuckle whenever you use one on starscream and show him ,, or like the one time you got a good picture of knockout having his face on a penguin

• never use them on him. he gets super pissy about it ,, so mad ,, you’re hanging by a thread here human ,, now delete that photo of him or its a little taste of death for you

• somehow ,, just somehow ,, the filter worked on soundwave and you were quick to show megatron of your accomplishment ,,

• he was amused by it ,, impressed even ,, but made sure you had got rid of it ,, as he didn’t want to upset his friend by this silly image

　　starscream ::

• hates the filters. theyre always used on him ,, what even are they ???

• always has the drag queen filter used on him ,, and he hates it

• always tries to convince you to do it someone else but it never works out ,, in the end ,, instead of getting a picture of some random vehicon with a broccoli head ,, its him with the broccoli head

• end this seeker abuse 💔💔 all humans are the same 😔🥀🥀

• knockout gets a good laugh out of it though 💪

　　dreadwing ::

• he’s usually too busy thinking about his past or smt to notice you using filters on him

• the only time he noticed is when the room was particularly dark and your flash was on

• immediately ,, he thought someone broke in ,, but nope <33 just you being a silly little human

• he was curious as to what the flash was for ,, and thats when you dropped the balls 😵‍💫😵‍💫 ,, he now knows about the filters

• he doesnt really see them as amusing ,, nor does he really care ,, bro dont give a fuck ,, just don’t get yourself killed over this

• there may be a few bots who don’t enjoy them ,, and if he catches you in a pickle w/ said bots ,, he may just feel willing to help you out of your situation

• use them on him if you want ,, he wont care

　　breakdown ::

• he loves them so much ,, human technology is amazing !! what other filters are there ?? will they work on him !? look ,, his face is blue now !!

• hes so humored by the filters ,, always carrying you around and letting you use filters on different bots

• the vehicons passing in the halls now have smiley faces all over their helms ,, knockout buffing himself in the medbay now has hearts above his helm

• he tries to see if theres other things you can use the filters on ,, like maybe one of knockout’s tools

• gets a bit bummed when it doesnt work ,, but you’re quick to make it up by showing a picture of broccoli head starscream

[fandom-go-round]

How about Cyclonus, Shockblast and Dirt Boss (all 3 from Unicron Trilogy) with human S/O, who is very good at medical technologies (to the point of successfully creating medicaments for cybertronians?

Warnings: Medical Talk, Doctor Reader, Avoiding Going to the Doctor

Cyclonus:

Cyclonus thinks that it’s interesting that you’re great at medical stuff, honestly, but it’s not as fun as fighting. He loves you a lot and cares about you but his specialty is messing things up. He changes his tune pretty quickly the first time you’re able to patch him up after a fight. That’s really cool! You’ll do it again for him won’t you?

He’s a mech that enjoys being reckless and there is a part of him that enjoys showing off for you. Even if you tell him that it’s nothing something you’re a fan of, that doesn’t stop this mech. He loves it when you pamper him and take care of him after a long mission. Having you kiss him better? Best thing ever.

He really is proud that you’re so good as a medical tech. Cyclonus can feel insecure about his brains at time; if people make fun of him, he can get caught up in it later. Sometimes he’ll ask you to explain a concept to him and you’re so good at it he’s in awe. He understands you and it’s amazing to him. Humans really are cool if you give them a chance.

Shockblast:

Shockblast is another bot who loves to run into danger. Well, run into danger and run his mouth. There are plenty of people who don’t appreciate him mouthing off and it can lead to scuffles. He always comes out on top, of course, but he avoids going to the med bay if he can. It’s a pain to try and explain and Megatron is already looking for an excuse to kick him out.

That’s where you come in, his very cute and very smart little human. The fact that you can heal him up is wonderful and also something he wants to keep hidden. He wants you to be his personal medic and no one else’s. Partly because he knows that Megatron would use you with no remorse and the other half being he wants you to himself.

He loves to tell you stories as you patch him up, usually along the lines of him kick aft and taking names. How accurate these stories are, you have no idea, but you’re not going to try to take him down a peg. You love that he has a lot of self-confidence. You do warn him to be careful but he thinks its cute more than anything; he has you to patch him up so he never worries about not making it.

Dirt Boss:

The two of you have a bit of a love-hate relationship. He loves you, he really does but he hates maintenance. He might not tell you to buzz off like other medics but if you push too much, he will get angry about it. You gotta understand babe, that’s just the way he is. He wants to be wild and free! And the louder his engine, the more badass he is.

You don’t try to hide that you can help fix him up, even if he doesn’t listen to you. The other Decepticon medics take this to mean that you’re going to do his maintenance and leave you to it. It can get really stressful, especially if he’s collapsed because of a fight or something else. Once you’ve caught him, Dirt Boss is pretty docile. He secretly likes you fussing over him and even if he hates getting fixed, it’s better that you’re doing it than someone else.

He loves the brag about your genius, even if it seems out of character. He’s the best so of course his babe is also going to be the best! He hates it when other people ask you for help and will tell them to buzz off. Dirt Boss might hate having to get fixed but that doesn’t mean these other Cons get to talk to you! His jealous often means that he’ll lock the two of you together inside of the med bay so no one else can bother you. It ends up with him getting fixed more often but it’s a sacrifice he’s willing to make.

[deliriousbug]

Mining Together

This was from an ask about Megatron finding out his human s/o being a miner, but I screwed up the formatting somehow??? So I fix and put it here.

Sooo they're on Earth for this one, idk why, Rodimus wanted to take a pitstop I guess and lets say something happened so they’ve been there awhile.

When Megatron realized how he felt about you, he worried he was crossing a line. For a human and a Cybertronian to be. . . romantically involved seemed dangerous to him, yet he was drawn to the companionship you weren’t shy to offer. Maybe your openness towards him made you less organic and more his close equal. It was strange, when you showed up to the ship coated in filth, he was too busy checking you for injuries to be disgusted.

“Sorry for the mess,” you said. “I didn’t get a chance to shower after work. We were blowing fuses and one of the tunnels collapsed so—”

Megatron’s optics snapped up to your face, so intense you stopped in the middle of your sentence. He stared at you, or right through you; It was hard to tell.

“What’s wrong?” you asked, voice nothing but a hush.

He backed off, where he was knelt to your level he now stood, towering over, looking down at the speck of you. “Are you forced to mine?” he asked, rage lowering his tone.

“What? No, not at all.” You tried to crane your neck to see his face, but he wasn’t looking at you anymore. “I mean, my gramps and my father were both miners so I guess it’s sort of in the family. But I’m not forced. I could do anything else if I wanted, you know.”

Megatron hunched a bit to see your face. “Are the conditions not horrific?”

You frowned. “They used to be, way back when, before all the tech. Before, yeah it was bad, still is in some regions, but here I get paid triple the minimum wage, health care, all that. If anyone’s hurt, they get airlifted out to the closest hospital. Last time someone was seriously injured like that was when I first started: A big rig fell and crushed a guy.”

His expression was finally starting to loosen up as he understood. You were no slave, and you probably never would be. Strange, how such a young race could have gone through all the stages of social and economic evolution that took Cybertron centuries. Why?

“Hey.” You awkwardly patted his leg, trying to be comforting but still uncertain. “Did something happen?”

Megatron tried to smile but it was more a distracted grimace. He waited so long to answer that you weren’t sure he would. “Before the war, I was nothing but hardware in a mine. The horrors that I witnessed. . .” He cleared his throat and carefully picked you up. “It was what spurred me to revolt.”

You saw the pain in his optics, a shadow of the memories that still haunted him, and reached out to caress the side of his face. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Why should I have? These things are of the past and I do not wish to relive them. Although. . .” He closed his optics and held you close to his face. “I would much rather spend my time in the moment, with you. After you’ve bathed.”

[jaysdoodlehell]

I'm supper busy with my commissions rn, so I thought I may share old doodles of my side project I'm working on with my friend @kingborb

Most of the designs you see here are a bit outdated, but generally this is our techno-organic AU, based around a concept of what would happen if Primus and Unicron would never split from the one entity they once were :3

The main story we work on is post war, but because there is a lot of changes all around we have everything planned from the beginning, so from the time Pimes roamed the planet's surface.

Still can't believe it all started just because I wanted to try making this one humanformer design of Starscream XD

[toastys-muses]

Loading. . .

C h a r a c t e r P r o f i l e . . .

S k y b l a z e . . .

Complete!

Name: SkyBlaze

Gender: Femme

Age: 4Mil

Faction: Decepticon

Alternate Mode: Sukhoi Su-57

Universe: Prime, IDW, Sunset (fan made)

Faction Rank: Junior Lieutenant

Function: Seeker

-PERSONALITY-

Mental Age: 25

Personality: She is feisty, passionate, and expressive. SkyBlaze has a fiery spirit and has been compared to fire. In her youth, she was very talkative, obnoxious, impulsive and enthusiastic, which often got her into trouble on Cybertron.

Strengths: Open Minded

Self Control

Adaptable

Determined

Weaknesses:

Insecure

Overthinks

Avoids confrontation

Quirks: None, really.

Other Information:

•Her life back on Cybertron, before the war, wasn’t the best because of Sunspot. Sunspot was trying to force SkyBlaze to spread her beliefs, taking advantage of her position as the Junior Lieutenant, and influence on the public.

•When sunspot was on the floor writhing in pain from the untested CNA, SkyBlaze just shut the door and locked up her lab, hoping she just.. Die.

•Her wing was torn off by an insecticon, sometime after Airachnid made her army.

•Her T-Cog was also damaged when she was attacked, and they “haven’t been able to replace it yet”, when in reality megatron won’t allow the medics to replace them as punishment.

•She didn’t like how megatron was leading, but was convinced he could lead Cybertron into a better future, after Starscream joined him.

•Fattest crush on Starscream.

•Unfortunately, due to a bad argument with Sunspot, SkyBlaze was brutally impaled by her own spear and shoved off a cliff. It happened sometime after Starscream came back.

•SkyBlaze can actually fight really well. Very agile ands uses her staff a lot in battle.

•She had gotten her Staff from Sunspot originally.

•She was reallly close friends with knockout and breakdown, until breakdown was killed, causing her and KO to drift apart.

•She has a predacon “pet”, named XenoQuill, gifted to her by Shockwave

•She eventually killed sunspot by decapitation. Ripped her head and ‘throat’ clean off.

Hobbies/Interests: Learning about human cultures and earth’s languages.

Likes: Fireflies, human music, Rain, walking along the nemesis when everyone is in recharge and it’s quiet around midnight, waterfalls, spending time with XenoQuill.

Dislikes: The smell of fast food, the sound of tires screeching, Sunspot, Megatron’s leading methods, being asked about her wings.

Fears: Death

-APPEARANCE-

General Appearance: SkyBlaze has a small, filled out build. She has fiery red eyes, a large left wing, four secondary wings. Her right wing was unfortunately damaged “beyond repair.”

Build: Small, Filled out, Still aerodynamic.

Color Scheme: Monochromatic, with shades of red and burnt orange.

Height: 25’7

Alt. Mode Appearance: A dark grey Sukhoi Su-57 with accents of light grey and spots of white. The cockpit window is also a burnt Orange.

-WEAPONS & ARMOR-

Primary Weapon: Her charged bo staff.

Secondary Weapon: Morph Gun, or her Claws

Melee Weapon: Her cuffs, that can extend into daggers.

Armor type: Average armour.

Strengths:

Agility

Light-weight

Gymnastics

Speed

Weaknesses:

Energy depletion

-STATS-

Strength: 7/10

Fire Power: 4/10

Agility: 7.5/10

Reflexes: 6/10

Dexterity: 4/10

Intelligence: 8/10

Endurance: 5/10

Tech: 5.5/10

Courage: 7/10

Skill: 6/10

Experience: 8/10

[rogue-seeker]

file: mind conflicted, networked bodies

tw: Starscream being bastard and pushing boundaries, Soundwave being creepy Soundwave, body weirdness

Note: This takes place in the NEST base arc of Rogue Seeker before Skywarp and co. show up. Hexbolt is an OC, an uploaded human mind who inhabits a network of drone bodies and fought against the Autobots in the Invasion three centuries prior.

---

"Fascinating, this plethora of bodies."

Starscream grinned and commented as kha purveyed Dr.Hex's collection of drones with gleaming optics. It wasn’t hard to get into the old workshop, after all Starscream was former SIC of the Decepticons and sparkbonded to khyr ship, The Nemesis,  kha had bypass codes for all of nir chambers.

The Organic Intelligence, Hexbolt and NEST had moved into the ship centuries prior, but their inferior tech hadn’t unlocked most of the locked rooms.  Still, their...occupation was enough that places like this drone workshop now existed.

Kha holographic crest pricked up in interest.

There was the near-human replicant frame, winged and tailed. It was curled in a nest of blankets and pillows on a shelf-loft with human-sized tools, furniture and living quarters with a small kitchenette and a bathing area. It’s breathing was shallow and slow. Starscream took a mild note on the differing scales that the Organic Intelligence used for their differing sized bodies

Tucked away into shelves and cubbies on the shelf-loft was the smaller frames. Kha sneered at the drones in the shape of organic Terran insecticons and fictional ones like the creepy food insecticons from Bugsnax. Artificial birds and small mammals stared at khyr with dead eyes.

On the wall above the sleeping replicant, was the unmoving Kafka-esque drone, in the visage of an Earth roach, its wings crowned with a human face.

Starscream’s holographic feathers flattened against khyr helm in disgust and kha swept khyr holo tail feathers over the roach drone in reflex.

[Starscream: Explain presence.]

Soundwave’s private message burned in the lower right corner of khyr HUD.

Starscream spunned on khyr heel and looked in the darkest corner of the workshop. Ah, there.

Soundwave, keeping sentinel. Zir pigment nanites had shifted to be pitch-black and zir biolights was off. Ze was nothing but a mech-sized silhouette, their visor flashed in the darkness.

[I just need to ask them something, Soundwave. Nothing to worry your pretty helm over.]

Soundwave didn’t reply, but kha could tell they were recording.

Starscream shook khyr helm and turned around. Kha paid zir no heed, let zir go back to being the silent one.

The network was silent, each drone body had empty eyes and dim optics.

Starscream wasn't sure if anyone was home.

Just because the near-human replicant was breathing, didn’t mean there was a mind to pilot it.

Soundwave's presence had a way of ensuring that Hex wasn't around, let alone in what was their private quarters.

There was only one way to find out.

Starscream picked khyr way past several old mechframes, while Soundwave's helm slowly turned to watch khyr movements.

Sitting against the wall was an old familiar drone frame, it leaned against the wall, its four hands clasped in its lap as its legs were outstretched before it.

"Ah, I remember this one. The satellite-former that my darling Skywarp once built, based off that ancient extinct codeline. You used to own this as a drone, Soundwave."

Ze did the barest of nods.

Khyr talons reached out to caress the side of the helm.  Kha remembered Skywarp craving violence and metal to grow that frame.

It's faceless visor flashed and its engines rumbled and its vocalizer crackled.

DESIST

The frame boomed out, sounding exactly like Soundwave when angered.

In the corner, Soundwave's data cable unfurled.

In a flash, the Satellite frame leapt to its feet and slapped the data cable away, its own talons glinted.

DESIST

"Ah, so someone is home!" Starscream smirked, khyr own denta flashed in the dim lighting.

"You're an ass. The hell you want!? I was sleeping." Hexbolt said.

"Ah, is that anyway to speak to your elders? After how I settled the status issues between you and Soundwave here?"

Hexbolt turned on their heel and tilted its helm, EM field tense and tight against their frame.

Starscream just cackled.

"You really are like Soundwave, even moving your helm like zir."

Hex just flexed their claws. " Yeah and without me, you wouldn't even be awake with a working body. I doubt you came here to compare the two of us. What is it?"

Soundwave nodded in approval in the background.

Starscream knelt down and picked up the toaster body from its cubby on the shelf-loft. It warbled in annoyance. "I see this little one's currently connected."

The toaster pouted on its screen.

Its little nubby legs flailed.

Soundwave's data cable snaked its way from zir corner to the back of Starscream's neck, kha could hear the slow spin of its tines whir menacingly.

Heh.

Hex folded their arms, all four of them, and silently watched, the visor had the recording mark. No doubt they were studying the dynamics between khyr and their adopted parent.

Starscream gently ran khyr talons over the toaster body and handed Hexbolt's small drone body to the satellite frame. Handing them back to themself.  The toaster warbled in appreciation at being back with theirself.

Soundwave's threat didn't relent.

Behind a giant isopod body, several fryder drones watched warily. Kha reached out for them and they skittered underneath.

Another data cable reached out, this one aimed for the base of khyr helm, the tines on this data cable spun even faster.

The old satellite frame ex-vented as the toaster body wriggled itself free. It nubbled its way over to Soundwave, who picked it up with gentle spindly digits.

It chirruped happily.

The satellite frame's claws started to crackle.

"Both of you get out. I went to sleep. Alone for a reason." Hexbolt turned to look at Soundwave, both faceless visors stared straight at each other.

The toaster whined sadly.

Both satellite-mech and toaster eyed each other, a silent battle of wills.

Starscream chuckled.

"Mind conflicted, aren't you? A part of you wishes to stay with Soundwave and recharge like a good sparkling, the rest of you is determined to stay independent and free of flock and adopted creator."

Whirring tines started to slow.

Soundwave's grip on the toaster tightened and the toaster nestled in zir grip.

The satellite frame backed away from both of them and turned their back on both of them.

"Out."

The toaster beeped.

"Yes, that includes you!"

Hexbolt's satellite frame looked over their shoulder. "Well?"

Soundwave nodded, and zir data cables withdrew back into zir now glowing frame. Ze picked up the toaster to its helm and it nuzzled the Voidwing's chin.

Soundwave stalked out the doorway, zir e-m field flickered happily.

"Fascinating. With your network, both your wishes came true. Independence and a good snuggle." Starscream laughed.

"I told you to leave."

"Ah, I need a favor of you."

"Right, when you harassed me awake." Starscream purred and khyr tone became silky.

"It's for science."

Hexbolt's turned around and leaned against the wall, arms crossed and right leg planted on the wall behind them. Their faceless helm cocked in interest.

"Okay, you bastard, I'm listening."

"This frame, you built. " Khyr claws swept over khyr frame. "It's flawed."

Hexbolt sagged a little as they hunched over and their most outer two arms tapped their claws against the wall.

"....I'm not surprised. You are the first and only Cybertronian I've tried to revive. My old mech prototypes fell apart, until that modified Thunderbolt jet came together."

Starscream's smirk grew.

Khyr holo tail feathers slowly curled around the once human drone network in front of khyr. The lack of belligerent debate was surprising but welcome. So different then from dealing with Megatron.

"Yes, you see the problem then."

Their faceless visor recorded the hypnotic movement of khyr holo feathers.

"At least that works, eh? I got the holographic feathers down. That took a while."

Starscream tsked. "Actually."

Hexbolt's helm dipped down.

"It's missing a whole spectrum of color, in the UV range. Among others that don't come naturally to your biological cameras."

"...I see. I was guessing from old video and simulations ran on my network. You understand. The few surviving cybertronian appliances  aren't really interviewable."

Starscream nodded. "Still impressive for a species with your limitations. But you know." Kha said, airily.

"It's limiting your communication opportunities. The missing range is a disability. Though....do you even need that to communicate with Soundwave?"  Hexbolt's helm looked straight up at Starscream, it bored into khyr, despite the younger network being half khyr size in that form.

Starscream scowled and khyr holo feathers flashed neon blue, the color of life, energon, and rage.

"No. Zir codeline didn't rely on holographic displays for communication."

The ex-Winglord reached out with a claw and gently tapped on the face-screen.

"This? They used."

Hexbolt raised an arm and pushed away khyr claws as Starscream laughed softly.

Hexbolt straightened their back and looked straight up at Starscream, with that eerie blank face. Unlike Soundwave, they never displayed anything to the adult Cybertronians. Kha had only seen them display to other humans and khyr shared creations with Soundwave. 

"I'll send you some textbooks on human consent and you send me what you need fixed.  Display an understanding of human consent culture and I'll start on your new improved form."

Starscream's optics shuttered.

Hexbolt continued, "Deal? Can't be that hard, Winglord. Just some simple reading you need to get done, while I have to build a whole-"

Starscream scowled. "Please. While your work is quite admirable for your species, I'll still be supervising and giving aid as needed."

"Of course, such supervision and aid doesn't need face tapping. Unless there's some form of cultural meaning, I'm not aware of." Hexbolt looked Starscream up and down. "Now get the fuck out of my workshop, unless you want to know why I survived the Autobot Purges."

Starscream's optics narrowed along with the glowing optics on their holographic feathers.

Khyr crest flattened against khyr helm, streaked with irritated grey. "This will be a fruitful venture, yes? I'm more then happy to let Soundwave know of your progress and emotional state."

Hexbolt stiffened.

"Yes, ze will be quite pleased to know that you agreed to work with me on this." Starscream smiled and slowly sauntered out of the workshop.

The door slid behind khyr as Hexbolt's blank face screen recorded khyr.

-end-

[lovemesomerobobois]

Okay!!!!!! I know your getting a lot of mtmte, buttttttt could we get a little Drabble or whatever and mega finding out his Human s/o was a miner? Kinda like that last one just..... not like the last one?!?!? Idk I think the differences would be really cool (ya know, getting to choose being a miner, being willing, getting paid more) sooo... yeah!

Sooo they're on Earth for this one, idk why, Rodimus wanted to take a pitstop I guess and lets say something happened so they’ve been there while. I know this doesn’t do your idea justice, but I hope it is at least a little in the ballpark. I am also very very very sorry that i took so long to answer! When Megatron realized how he felt about you, he worried he was crossing a line. For a human and a Cybertronian to be. . . romantically involved seemed dangerous to him, yet he was drawn to the companionship you weren’t shy to offer. Maybe your openness towards him made you less organic and more his close equal. It was strange, when you showed up to the ship coated in filth, he was too busy checking you for injuries to be disgusted. “Sorry for the mess,” you said. “I didn’t get a chance to shower after work. We were blowing fuses and one of the tunnels collapsed so—” Megatron’s optics snapped up to your face, so intense you stopped in the middle of your sentence. He stared at you, or right through you; It was hard to tell. “What’s wrong?” you asked, voice nothing but a hush. He backed off, where he was knelt to your level he now stood, towering over, looking down at the speck of you. “Are you forced to mine?” he asked, rage lowering his tone. “What? No, not at all.” You tried to crane your neck to see his face, but he wasn’t looking at you anymore. “I mean, my gramps and my father were both miners so I guess it’s sort of in the family. But I’m not forced. I could do anything else if I wanted, you know.” Megatron hunched a bit to see your face. “Are the conditions not horrific?” You frowned. “They used to be, way back when, before all the tech. Before, yeah it was bad, still is in some regions, but here I get paid triple the minimum wage, health care, all that. If anyone’s hurt, they get airlifted out to the closest hospital. Last time someone was seriously injured like that was when I first started: A big rig fell and crushed a guy.” His expression was finally starting to loosen up as he understood. You were no slave, and you probably never would be. Strange, how such a young race could have gone through all the stages of social and economic evolution that took Cybertron centuries. Why? “Hey.” You awkwardly patted his leg, trying to be comforting but still uncertain. “Did something happen?” Megatron tried to smile but it was more a distracted grimace. He waited so long to answer that you weren’t sure he would. “Before the war, I was nothing but hardware in a mine. The horrors that I witnessed. . .” He cleared his throat and carefully picked you up. “It was what spurred me to revolt.” You saw the pain in his optics, a shadow of the memories that still haunted him, and reached out to caress the side of his face. “Why didn’t you tell me?” “Why should I have? These things are of the past and I do not wish to relive them. Although. . .” He closed his optics and held you close to his face. “I would much rather spend my time in the moment, with you. After you’ve bathed.”

[afterspark-podcast]

G1 Episode 42: Transcript

[This can also be found on AO3!]

[Stinger]

O: But that's because he acquired a dog!

[Intro Music]

O: Hello, and welcome to the Afterspark Podcast, an episode by episode recap of the Generation 1 Transformers cartoon. I'm Owls!

S: And I'm Specs.

O: And today we're going to be talking about episode number 42: The Autobot Run. Let's talk about giant robots today, shall we?

S: Yeah!

O: So once upon a time... on a racetrack.

S: Spike and Chip get a brilliant idea: What if the other boss participated in racing? 

O: Bumblebee arrives and says, “One limo-bot at your service,” uh, which is adorable, might I add?

S: Spike asks Bee how he feels about racing.

O: Bee is decidedly not a speedster as he seems down for it as long as it's under the speed limit, which also amusingly, goes against the fact that he totally got pulled over for speeding in an earlier episode but whatever. 

S: Yeah, yeah that's true. Laserbeak overhears this exchange.

O: I'm not exactly sure how any of this is going to help the Decepticons but all right.

S: The Decepticons are just- they're here to gather all the information they can. 

O: It's Laserbeak's job. I- I am just imagining him picking up on the most mundane information and, like, having to pass it off to Soundwave because it's his job.

S: Yeah, oh god, they probably have terabytes of information stored someplace. 

O: [Laughter] Probably.

S: Yeah. Elsewhere, in a weirdly well-preserved old west town, the Constructicons are finishing the dumb 80’s weapon of the week. The, um, Transfixatron which sounds like could be a lot of things, but probably not what you're expecting.

O: Uh, which is, of course, a purple gun mounted on a weird stand thing. 

S: Yep. Laserbeak's arrival causes Megatron to go off model and resemble Homer Simpson for a split second in the mouth department.

O: Which is very unnerving.

S: Yeah and I- I keep envisioning it right now and it is definitely very unnerving.

O: Very, very, very unnerving. Um, Laserbeak hops into Soundwave’s chest compartment and reports on the doings of the Autobots’ human allies, and the Autobots too, I guess. Since Bumblebee was there.

S: Yeah, Megatron is going to make good use of this information about the, uh, proposed Autobot race. 

O: Again, not sure how but okay, buddy! 

S: Yeah, but, uh, first he's gotta test out his new toy! Much to the chagrin of Starscream, who really does not approve that they're not beating up the Autobots right now.

O: You know, I think he's just salty that Megatron had the Constructicons build his new toy instead of him.

S: Yeah, that sounds- that sounds on brand. He calls it an idiotic contraption.

O: Of course the moment Megatron threatens to use it on Starstream, as his first test subject, suddenly Starstream changes his tune on if the device might work or not. “After all, what's a test without a guinea pig-atron.” Yes, Megatron said that word for word.

S: Guinea pig has clearly entered the Decepticons lexicon.

O: Yes, so Megatron picks up the entire gun which, again, I remind you is on a base, uh, and, uh, shoots Starscream.

S: Why does it have a stand at all? Maybe just get a shoulder strap or a harness or something for it? Or a table? Do they not want to draw a table? This is a very stupidly designed contraption.

O: Which, you know, is per the norm for 80's cartoons. At first, it appears that the gun has done nothing to Starscream.

S: Starscream responds just about how you'd expect, mock-mocking Megatron for his high-tech garbage.

O: But Megatron tells Starscream to try and transform, which, of course, he can't because that's the entire function of the Transfixatron.

S: Transfixing you in your-

O: Alt.

S: Altmode, yeah. And so Shockwave suddenly appears standing next to Megatron despite not being in any of the previous shots?

O: I also don't think he shows up again in this episode. He certainly doesn't have any lines.

S: Yeah, he just- poof. He's just taking a mini vacation.

O: Assumably he wanted off Cybertron for a while.

S: [indistinct] Yeah.

O: Uh, Starscream begs Megatron to return him to normal. 

S: They bicker, there's some back and forth. Megatron threatens to leave him this way forever.

O: Starscream says, “But I'm too valuable to you!” I'm too good of a lay, boss you can't do this.

S: Megatron tells him to stop whining and, uh, returns Starscream to normal. He then monologues a bit about how they're going to use the Transfixatron on the Autobots and then commands the Constructicons to, “Get started on the second device.”

O: So we don't just get one silly 80’s weapon of the week, we get two in this episode!

S: Gee, I wonder what it looks like.

O: [Laughter] The answer to that might surprise you! 

S: This inexplicably involves Hook plunging his namesake into the ground to begin excavating- with his hook. The Constructicons, well, the other Constructicons begin digging in a much more sensible manner.

O: Now at the Ark, uh, Chip and Spike are on the cusp of convincing Optimus Prime of their charity racing idea.

S: The other Autobots all seem pretty for it.

O: Ironhide wants some action or he'll rust. I'm not sure if I had Ironhide’s alt that racing would be my first choice of a leisure activity, but more power to you buddy.

S: Obviously he's just going to use his multitude of weaponry to booby-trap the track. I mean, who knows? Maybe he's got some sort of rocket booster? 

O: [Laughter] More of the rocket-powered fist! 

S: Yeah, or at least everybody but Huffer is into the idea. Frankly, I have to wonder where Red Alert is because he'd probably be having a conniption.

O: Okay, he is locked up in his room monitoring things, probably. And it's like, “I don't see it, I don't hear it, it does not exist,” I imagine. Uh but, of course, this means Huffer is voluntold that he gets to stay and watch the base.

S: Yep, ah, Huffer who gets to be responsible today, but Brawn, Ratchet and Wheeljack stay behind to keep him company. 

O: Which is weird, because isn't Wheeljacks’ alt a race car?

S: Yeah, he's a Lancia Stratos.

O: You’d think he'd be more into this. 

S: Maybe he's just not that big into going around- around- around- around in a circle. It's just not so exciting for him.

O: I-I do like the idea of somebody who definitely does not have the personality of a race car being put into the body of a racing car like- you know, he's a scientist in all- all reality he should be like, uh, um, a sedan or something, but- but he got stuck in the body of a race car!

S: Optimus leads the rest of the Autobots out with the call of: “Roll for the show!”

O: At the racetrack, with our celebrity guests, the Autobots.

S: Our roster for today is: Cliffjumper, Bluestreak, Jazz, Prowl, Sideswipe, Ironhide, Hound, Sunstreaker, Optimus, Trailbreaker, Mirage, Windcharger, and Gears.

O: Huffer was too cranky to come but Gears is just fine with this today.

S: He's a sporty little car, he can have a little racing, you know, as a treat.

O: [Laughter] Uh, one man from the audience jumps up and says, “Hey! Where are their cars?!” 

S: Honey, honey, they are the cars.

O: Has this man been living under a rock for a year or so, or however long they've been there and missed the whole giant transforming alien robots bit?

S: Very probably.

O: Jesus!

S: I'm going to go with a ‘yes’ here.

O: Where do you live, man? I-I would like directions because I would like to not be in society right now. Um, so we see Bumblebee chilling off to the side with Chip and Spike as the two- ah, the three of them, rather, watch the race. 

S: He doesn't really seem like he cares for sports.

O: He likes the speed limit just fine, thanks. That's what he said to the- I know, it's funny. 

S: Mostly I'm just wondering if he was involved in that episode where Optimus plays basketball or whatever.

O: I can't remember. I- like, I'm remembering like Sunstreaker and, I think, Sideswipe but I don't- I don't remember if Bee was involved with the basketball or not.

S: I feel like he wasn't, but yeah, I don't remember so, yeah, he's just- Bee does not care about sports, yeah. Ah, the Autobots, predictably, transform and line up at the starting line. 

O: The race begins!

S: Ironhide and Trailbreaker rib each other a little bit as neither of them seems terribly quick.

O: Sunstreaker leaves the rest in the dust, taunting them as he goes by. Oh, my beautiful idiot.

S: Mirage being an actual Formula One race car also pulls ahead and Jazz decides they need a soundtrack. 

O: Which I would think driving around in circles would be boring so, I don't know, that seems like a very good call to me.

S: Yeah, Optimus Prime is inexplicably close to the lead, I mean, maybe everyone is-

O: Too afraid to pass him?

S: Maybe, or they're all just chill and this is their equivalent of jogging around a track.

O: [Laughter] Okay, that's kind of funny. Suddenly! Skywarp appears overhead, transforming into his root mode and pulling the Transfixatron out of his ass. 

S: Subspace, hammer space, wherever Optimus hides his trailer. 

O: Skywarp hits all of the Autobots on the track with the Transfixatron. 

S: Spike sees this and says, “What was that?”

O: Bumblebee responds with something about energy evaporation from all the speed.

S: Bumblebee responds with bullshit. 

O: [Laughter]

S: Let's just be straight about this.

O: Skywarp teleports away, meeting back up with the Decepticons

S: Megatron actually praises him.

O: Again, he really seems to like Skywarp.

S: Back on the racetrack, Ironhide asks Trailbreaker if he felt anything weird.

O: And then Trailbreaker, again, ribs him because Ironhide’s in last place and, really, when you get down to it they are in a race of two and are really only up for who's not in last place right now because they are both very slow.

S: Yeah, the group approaches the finish line with Jazz and Mirage out in front.

O: We're not really told who wins but it's safe to assume it was either Jazz or Mirage or, maybe, both of them.

S: Yeah. On to the next event on the docket for today: The Autobots’ incredible car stunts.

O: Sunstreaker has all the other Autobots line up so he can jump over them off, you know, jump off a ramp over them, rather. 

S: Ah, time to be a daredevil. Some of the Autobots dislike this idea more than others, but they all, you know, comply and line up. 

O: Optimus tells Sunstreaker he won't be able to make it.

S: Spoiler alert: Sunstreaker does not make it.

O: But! Sunstriker is saved by some quick thinking by Windcharger, who catches him with his magnets.

S: And the crowd seems to love it anyway, so: Mission accomplished! 

O: Mirage catches sight of the Decepticons and the Autobots attempt to transform. Of course Megatron lands in front of them and gloats.

S: It's Megatron, I mean, that's what he does, it's what he loves.

O: It's what he lives for.

S: Then Megatron uses- utilizes some eye lasers to chase the humans away.

O: When did he get eye lasers!?

S: He's just had so much stupid shit installed.

O: [Deadpan] Help the Autobots are in danger, cut to commercial. 

S: Is this a facelift for Decepticons?

O: I don't know. 

S: The Decepticons attack and with the Autobots in car mode they aim for the tires.

O: Bee gets Spike and Chip out of there before they're noticed and heads back to the Ark. 

S: Ironhide tells everybody to, “Push past that flat tire,” but they start taking hits from Thundercrackers’ incendiary blasts.

O: Ironhide says, “I'm getting sunburnt on the inside!” Push past it, Ironhide, push past it! 

S: Soundwave then disables the Autobots communicators and Megatron says to, “Take them away.” 

O: Bee’s plan actually worked quite well and the Decepticons never noticed them at all and they were able to get back to the Ark and tell the remaining Autobots basically all this shit went down.

S: Yup. Huffer bitches and moans before Brawn threatens to put his, “Footio into his audio.”

O: That's not even clever.

S: It isn't.

O: I know what I'm watching. [Laughter] Uh, Chip uses Teletraan I and he, Wheeljack, and Ratchet are very quickly able to come up with a hypothesis for what could have caused the Autobots to not be able to transform.

S: Ratchet and Wheeljack get to work. They got some business to take care of.

O: Good thing, too- they left two of the scientists behind. Where's Perceptor? 

S: Yeah, and Beachcomber? I mean-

O: They're just off today, apparently! 

S: Maybe Beachcomber took the- the Dinobots out?

O: Yeah, that's just the right recurring joke at this point is he- he babysits the Dinobots in his downtime.

S: Beachcomber and Perceptor took the Dinobots out on an expedition-

O: So, Ratchet and Wheeljack could have a nice, quiet couple's day at home and then this happened.

S: Yes.

O: Gotcha. Back in the old west, Megatron unveils his second bullshit machine.

S: Guess what it does? Guess what it does? It's gonna eat the Autobots!

O: That's what he says but that thing has fucking tentacles. Remember what I said, is what you didn't expect? It has fucking tentacles! And, you know, it makes me think, remember that episode of the giant supercomputer, TORQ III, and the weird kink machines he was using against the Autobots? I am just saying he did that after being corrupted by Megatron. After!

S: Yeah.

O: Megatron! Has a thing! For kink machines!

S: Yeah, the machine is really dark purple-

O: Of course.

S: It has a large grabby claw and a crusher at the top and also, weirdly enough, smaller tentacles.

O: Don't know what to do with your machine? Add more tentacles!

S: Apparently. Well, I mean, the whole theoretically them coming from the Quintessons, kind of makes that all really-

O: It does make a little bit more sense with that, doesn't it? Hmm.

S: Yeah, time to shudder.

O: [Laughter] Ironhide cuts off Megatron with the sentiment of, ‘Oh, just kill us already,’ rather than have to listen to him talk.

S: Then, of course, Megatron wants to demonstrate to them exactly how they're going to die but so the Cons toss in some stuff to show the Autobots how they're going to get crushed. Did they just go off and grab some junk for this?

O: I assume? Maybe it was spare parts from the machine- or like, they didn't use when building the machine? 

S: Maybe.

O: While all this is going on, Hound is able to transmit a single image to the Ark, despite their communicators being disabled. 

S: Teletraan I is able to triangulate their exact location based on this one image which, I guess, is not out of the realm of possibility.

O: It still seems kind of silly.

S: Yeah.

O: Um, Soundwave being, you know, the only competent one here realizes that something's up pretty quickly and shoots Hound's gun that was also acting as his transmitter?

S: He's the guy who does the... holograms! 

O: Yes.

S: That was what I was... yeah, so yeah. Who knows what the fuck Hound can do. Megatron's new machine spits a tiny little block of crushed metal out so apparently he was concerned with how much space his enemy's corpses would take up.

O: At least he's not littering?

S: I guess? I mean you can always recycle material but I guess he's an evil villain so, uh, yeah.

O: [Laughter] He's going to build a house out of his enemy’s corpses is what I'm getting from this, okay. It's gonna have an entire fortress of Autobots. 

S: I think, more likely to do a chair out of corpses.

O: That's true, there aren't that many Autobots there.

S: Yes, but I think there's also a weird precedent for that in the comics.

O: Yeah, probably. 

S: Megatron tells the Constructicons to make Ironhide the first target and the Autobots surround him like circling up the wagons and the- but the Constructicons just sort of casually pick them up and toss them over to the side and get to Ironhide anyway.

O: Because, again, they're all stuck in car mode.

S: Yea.

O: Uh, back at the Ark, Wheeljack and Ratchets’ labors have produced, the Holy Hand Grenade!

S: [Laughter] This will apparently create energy waves that will allow the others to go back to normal.

O: Unfortunately, there's no time to test if this will work so off they go to try to save their friends.

S: Back with the Cons, Ironhide is in the grasp of the purple, chompy machine and about to be eaten but Optimus sends out Roller. It's Roller time, guys!

O: Duh-duh-na-na!

S: Jazz hands.

O: Jazz doesn't have any hands right now. [Laughter] Sorry.

S: Jazz speakers, then!

O: [Laughter]

S: Uh, Roller begins, uh, weaving between the Decepticons’ legs as they all start shooting at him.

O: The rest of the Autobots arrive just in time.

S: And Ratchet gets to be Ironhide again because he's miscolored. Again.

O: So, Ironhide is about to get eaten and is also driving up to himself.

S: Good times, good times, guys.

O: [Laughter]

S: While the Cons are distracted, Optimus rams the machine causing it to drop Ironhide onto the ground.

O: Megatron's pissed and fires on Optimus and Ironhide. 

S: Ratchet is uh, Ratchet again before turning back into ironhide for three sec- three seconds later.

O: Soundwave, his cassettes, Skywarp, and Thundercracker begin attacking them.

S: But at least Spike brought his personal protective equipment today.

O: Yay. 

S: Wheeljack is running in an attempt to protect the grenade in what can only be described as a Scooby-Doo-esque sequence.

O: Which is very applicable considering how many Scooby-Doo voice actors were in this show but anyway, I have no idea how the Cons know that Wheeljack's the one they should target right now but they are targeting him.

S: Yeah, two Thundercrackers appear to be chasing Wheeljack before one disappears, presumably Skywarp, uh, you know, teleporting and reappears as Starscream before yelling in Skywarp's voice.

O: So everything went wrong in that scene that possibly could. [Laughter] 

S: Well, aside from just completely forgetting to color characters at all.

O: Yes, yes but- but I think because the Seekers are all the same model it's almost worse when they're- they're colored the wrong color.

S: Yeah, the grenade is knocked out of Wheeljack's hand before Spike catches it.

O: Soundwave then makes a beeline for him and Soundwaves like, “Get the human microbe.” 

S: Spike then tosses the Holy Hand Grenade to Chip who begins wheeling away like there's absolutely no tomorrow. Soundwave sends out Ravage who knocks Chip over just as he throws the grenade to the Autobots.

O: Ravage, apparently, just leaves him alone after he does this instead of, I don't know, mauling him. 

S: He's a considerate cat. Thankfully the grenade does indeed work, pissing off Megatron who orders the Constructicons to combine.

O: And they seem quite happy to have something to do that isn't work on Megatron's pet projects.

S: Finally! Conflict!!! Hit it!!

O: Devastator then tosses the Autobots around.

S: And, surprising the hell out of us, the propulsion via hand thrusters makes a surprise second appearance with Wheeljack.

O: Who gets the great idea of defeating Devastator with the Transfixatron and enlists Cliffjumper to help him because he cannot reach the controls without help because the gun is too tall.

S: Yeah, so they hit Devastator with the gadget of the week and Devastator falls to pieces.

O: Megatron realizes they're outnumbered without Devastator and the Decepticons retreat.

S: Ironhide and Trailbreaker knock over the Transfixatron, which then has a tiny explosion for no good reason.

O: [Laughter]

S: Ratchet groans about how many repairs he's going to have to do now and the episode ends.

O: So join us next time for episode 43: The Golden Lagoon. Skinny dipping robots, skinny dipping robots everywhere. Oh, and also the Decepticons want to be... shiny.

S: And environmental destruction. But let's not forget the shiny.

O: [Laughter] The shiny is what's important here. 

S: Okay so we have two fanfic recommendations: one wild card fic from Owls and one from myself. Mine is “Going to the Dogs” by Koi Lungfish. It's in the G1 cartoon continuity, rated K+, it's Gen, there’s no pairings, and the characters are Red Alert, Prowl, Inferno, and Jazz. In summary, “Human tourists cause Prowl and Red Alert some confusion.” 

O: I could see that.

S: And so the reason I picked this one is because the race is basically like human outreach- social outreach, more or less. They're- they're trying to be entertainers, so the fan thing about the humans effectively trying to reach out and build more of a social profile with humans by inviting tourists into the Ark and trying to be transparent is- it's a fun concept and I like it.

O: Fair.

S: It's a one shot so therefore complete, so let's go on to Owls' choice!

O: All right, my fanfic suggestion for today is “Casting for a Tape Bros Film.” It is by LittleMissSweetGrass. The continuity is IDW, it is rated G. It is slash, but very light slash, I would say.  Our pairings are CosWave and our characters are Soundwave, Marissa, Rumble, Frenzy, Buzzsaw, Laserbeak, and Cosmos. And in summary, “Soundwave gets a phone call from Marissa that he really, really doesn't want to deal with right now.” It is a one shot, it's very short but it's very cute. It's kind of, I think, Soundwave trying to sleep and getting calls that involve Thundercracker.

Both: [Laughter]

O: A sudden attack of the Thundercracker.

S: Nice, and that just about wraps it up for us today.  Remember to check us out on Tumblr or Pillowfort as Afterspark-Podcast for any additional information, show notes, or links we may have mentioned.  You can also find us on Facebook and Twitter at AftersparkPod (all one word) and various other locations by searching for Afterspark Podcast such as AO3, iTunes, Spotify, and Youtube, just to name a few.  And feel free to send us questions on Tumblr, Youtube, or AO3!  Till next time, I'm Specs.

O: I’m Owls.

S: Toodles.

[Outro Music]

[tfwhynoy]

How about some headcanons with tfp: Megatron, Soundwave, Bumblebee, Optimus, and Ratchet. Their s-o/pet/friend introduces them to their Vector robot for the first time.

Gonna go with a friend for this.

Tfp Megatron

Couldn't care less. It's a tiny non-sentient machine. Why do you care so much about it?

You show what cool tricks it can do and he rolls his optics.

”Vector can also detect if he’s near a ledge so he won't fall off!” ”Glad I won’t have to worry about you panicking because it fell off a ledge I guess.” ”Victor is a he not an it!”

Tfp Soundwave

He’s seen the little things on the internet before and thinks they’re charming in their own little way. Small machines able to do simple tasks while also being able to play small games with a cute lil personality? It's a cute and useful idea.

He listens to you introduce him to Vector and it's sweet. He forgot how easily humans pack bond with things.

He offers to upgrade him with a little bit of cybertronian tech. Nothing fancy, he’d look almost exactly the same, just more durable while being lightweight, his screen with be able to express and generate more complex imagery to match his ”mood”, longer battery life, and of course, a slightly smarter ai to adjust to the upgrades.

Soundwave views Vector as a type of minibot for you. A really simple technically fake one, but for a human its the closest you’ll get to a real minibot.

Tfp Bumblebee

Loves Victor. He’s just a little quirky bot.

He can't do a full out fist bump but he’ll softly poke Vector for the fist bump thing he does. Bee does this at least once anytime you bring Vector.

He wishes he could speak with Vector. Sadly the lil guy doesn't understand him. You translate for be though.

Tfp Optimus

He’s happy to meet Vector. Even if it's just a little machine to give aid you still love it so he’ll treat it as a real sentient machine.

He can't help but smile slightly as you info dumb about the little machine. It's amazing how much humans can care for something a Cybertronian wouldn't think twice about. It makes him wonder more what the world looks like through your eyes.

He speaks to Vector with just as much respect as anyone else and as much as you know it's not sentient, you’ll always treasure the memory of Optimus asking how Vector’s day was and if he enjoyed his recharge from the night before.

Tfp Ratchet

He doesn't have time for this. He’s a busy mech.

Fine, he’ll meet Vector. He says an annoyed ”Hello” and then asks if you’re satisfied.

You aren't but if he’s gonna be such a grump then fine. You and Bee will play with Vector.