#thanks I've hurt myself

[chaoslaura]

In Das Herz der Schlange sagt Adam erst ganz zum Schluss als Leo ihm die Handschellen anlegt "Leo, ich war das nicht." Er hat es nicht am Telefon gesagt und nicht als sie sich wieder gesehen haben am See, obwohl man doch davon ausgeht dass jemand sofort verzweifelt seine Unschuld beteuert vor allem wenn man die Tat nicht begangen hat.

Bitte sag mir nicht dass Adam davon ausgegangen ist, dass Leo natürlich weiß dass es Adam nicht war und erst als Leo ihn verhaftet, Adam merkt, dass sogar Leo an ihm zweifelt😭

[sonicchaoscontrol]

[No update today, but I wanted to know you're all deeply appreciated here!]

[The TLDR: This week was absolutely full of pain & health issues that are slowly getting sorted out, but it left me no juice to sit here & work on pages. For now I'll try to fill the time with the askbox, & things should be back on track next Saturday! 🧡]

[cerise-on-top]

Hii!! :3

First of all, LOVE YOUR BLOG!!Your writing is so good!! May I request Rodolfo Parra x reader who is touchy? Like, they won’t if he doesn’t like it, but it’s a safety thing, like him being taller than me (even not by much) makes me secure, feeling his arm muscles to know he can protect me, holding his hand until he pulls away.

thank you!! :3

I don't think you understand the extent to which my Rodolfo is touch starved, he really wants a hug, and the ones that Alejandro give him don't really cut it, at all! Mans wants to be hugged and cuddled, so this is sort of just ideal to him!

Rodolfo with a Touchy!Reader

In all honesty, he’s hit the jackpot with you if you’re a touchy person. While he may not initiate too much physical touch himself in fear of coming off as clingy and annoying, he’s actually so touch starved, it’s unreal. If there weren’t some mental barriers there, then he’d absolutely love to touch and cuddle you whenever he could. Would love to kiss you, would love to hold you. He’s one of the biggest cuddlebugs on the planet in theory, but in practice he’s holding himself back due to the aforementioned reasons. However, he has no qualms whatsoever if you’re the one touching him, in fact, he’ll revel in it for as long as he can, or until you pull away. He gets a bit sad when you do, but he knows you’ve got better things to do as well from time to time.

Please do hold onto his arm when you’re walking somewhere, it makes him feel like the stronger guy out of the two of you. He just wants to make sure you feel safe and sound with him, and if he can accomplish just that? Heaven on earth, literally. Hold his hand, he’ll squeeze it every once in a while to make sure you know he’s still with you. You can even give him a hug in public where everyone can see you, he’ll shield you with his entire body and make sure to catch every single bullet that could come flying at you. While he’s not too big of a fan of kissing in public, thinking such a thing should be reserved for when the two of you are alone, he loves feeling your lips on him just about anywhere. Wanna kiss his cheek? His forehead? His lips? He’ll give you twice as many kisses back.

From time to time he might get a bit overwhelmed with all the affection, that’s when you might want to tone it down a bit. When he’s just downright pissed at someone or something, he’s less prone to being cuddly, but he’ll calm down eventually. Distract him, help him, give him some loving words, and he’ll be back to his usual self. Once he’s calmed down he might be a bit tired from all those emotions, so he might want some cuddles. Likely won’t ask for them, but he knows you’re always eager to cuddle him anyway.

While he does love holding something, or someone, when relaxing, nothing, to him, feels better than being held. That’s his guilty pleasure, being the little spoon, but you won’t catch him dead admitting that. In fact, he won’t even hint at wanting to be such, but he would absolutely never turn you down when you offer. Feeling your warmth against his back is nice, doesn’t matter if you can wrap yourself around him entirely or if you’re a backpack, he just wants to feel protected for once too. However, if something ever were to happen, then he’s the first to jump into action and beat the living daylights out of anyone who dares to intrude on such a sacred moment.

Hell, you can even put your head in his lap. He’ll lovingly stroke your back or your head, looking completely lovestruck at you. It’s a major sign of trust for him, especially when you’re slowly dozing off. Won’t move an inch if you do and will just continue to pat your hair, staring at you instead of the tv monitor. If you want, you can also adjust him so his head is in your lap instead, he would never say no to that either. In fact, if he’s comfortable enough, he might nuzzle into your hand, realize what he’s doing and get a bit embarrassed. He usually feels the need to be the big, strong man in your relationship, that he really shouldn’t be showing so much weakness, but how could he resist your tender, gentle touch when it’s right there? Showing you a glimpse of how touch starved he is is just about one of the most mortifying things out there, but he can’t help it. It simply feels so good.

He absolutely adores the fact he can make you feel safe. Again, he won’t really initiate much physical contact himself, but he will stand fairly close to you so you may, if you feel like it, just grab his hand and swing it around a bit as you’re walking around. You can lean into him, there’s a chance he might wrap an arm around you to make sure you won’t fall over. He loves that he can be your support system in a way that makes him happy as well. You get to touch him, he gets to be touched, it’s the most perfect symbiotic relationship out there.

At the end of the day, you both get to feel safe and sound with one another, because of your presence and because of your love. You protect each other and make sure the other is thriving, what thing in this world could possibly be more pure than that?

[swordheld]

how did u choose your username?

oh, this is a fun one!! i think i considered being swordtold at first, for that very ancient myth vibe of the sword being this narrative tool for adventure and structure and physical time, the parable being passed down through the centuries until it meddles into modern day rhetoric and ideology – a kind of fantastical tool, a spark of magic, of possibility.

i like the arc of the story of a place being physical / having it be held by time and hand alike, wearing with the years and having it become something different to each holder, each reader, each experience fantastical and individual.

having that kind of physicality to it; swordheld is the action of taking up and holding the sword yourself, choosing your own narrative, leading your own story. self-identity has always been something i struggle with (a novel concept i know, i know), so it felt right for this blog, since most of my older blogs before this one have been just me silently reblogging and never really posting anything myself, and i wanted this to be the change to that.

i've always had trouble wranging my social anxiety, esp. on the internet, and previously thought that keeping my words to myself helped keep the timeline cleaner, in a way, no messy thoughts for others to sort through, especially ones i believed no one would want to read anyway? but it never felt right, keeping myself apart from it all, esp. not in the way i so avidly enjoyed reading others' posts and additions, keeping their words close to my heart.

i wanted it to reflect that this was a space i was holding for myself? and i'm a little slow on the uptake sometimes, but this - this i think i got right. i love being here, on this blog, and the joy that it brings me. everyone else enjoying it too has been a wild ride that i never expected, and still surprises me, one that brings a little extra thrill to my heart whenever i think about it.

i had other urls that i liked, but i didn't want this blog to be tied directly to any of my fandom/story interests, since i wanted it to really just be a sort of archive of artistic inspiration and resource, like a little library or museum. i use them now as lil sideblogs of more niche interests now, which is rather lovely.

it hasn't always felt like it fit perfectly, the way that i'd like, but for some reason i can't think of really wanting to change it anytime soon. it feels mythic yet modern in a way that feels like puzzle pieces finally slotting into their place, something my own and inspirational to me, like a lantern i'm holding to make my way by. my own kind of light, if that makes sense – a star i know by name.

[crimeronan]

i was tired of being so antsy and anxious so i left the house and walked almost 5 miles. this technically broke my PT rules but i was able to consciously engage my core the whole time to keep my back from hurting + my hips from subluxing (thank u 9 days of PT exercises already making a measurable difference) & now i'm taking a hot bath so i am..... Knocking On Wood that i'll be okay. please god.

[spaceratprodigy]

🎉 [ Art from 2022-2023 ] 🎉

Happy Birthday to my most favorite person in the world, the love of my life 🖤

I still can't believe this'll make our 10th year of being best friends and even more I can't believe we get to celebrate our 8th anniversary this summer 💖💕

Commission Info | Ko-Fi | My Links

[chrisbangs]

hello... (and bye ig 👋)

[monster-every-day]

day 71 - 3/11/24 - candle construct

the lighting on this one is atrocious please don't look at this

anyways this design originally came to me as a concept for a regi. like from pokemon. a fire-type regi, it's a volatile ball of flame encased in sacred wax by ancient people. the reason its sacred wax is because you dont have to worry about it melting it regenerates. anyway it obviously wouldn't have looked like this.

[seiya-starsniper]

.

[whumblr]

For birds

Home is where the hurt is: Part 1. Continuation from the Sleeping beauty drabble. (or the -stuff his mouth with a sock- drabble)

-

“Right!” Jay slammed the front door shut and before Zayne could even look up and croon a ‘welcome home’, immediately started ranting. “What happened last night was totally unfair!”

“You think?” Zayne just said. He lay splayed out on the couch, socked ankles crossed on the coffee table, staring ahead and swirling a cup of coffee. He didn’t seem to be in a ‘welcome home’ mood – didn’t even glance up – but also didn’t look like he’d only just woken up, so Jay gave himself the all-clear to list off what he’d been steaming about all day.

“You can’t just expect me to know when you are going to drop by unannounced in the middle of the night, pick up on your foul exhausted mood, and control any snoring or sounds while I’m unconscious,” Jay raged as he took his jacket off, maintaining a safe distance.

“Right…”

“Also, that was wayyy out of line. You could have just nudged me or something, or woken me up like you usually do.”

“I guess.”

“And— Are you listening?”

With an exaggerated wince, Zayne looked up and pretended to only just notice Jay. He flashed a fake warm smile. “I was imagining you in total silence and it was a good look.”

“You can’t keep me quiet with socks and duct tape alone.”

Zayne gulped down his coffee. “And that’s the problem. And here…” he hooked his fingers around something and lifted it up for Jay to see, “is the solution.”

Jay blanched as he saw what dangled from his fingers. It looked like a leather collar with a little plastic device on it. Something flashed in the back of his mind in recognition, but he desperately pushed the thoughts away.

“Is… is that for dogs?”

“No, this one is for birds. Specifically for loud mouth birds who have trouble shutting up.”

“Cutting off my air will do more than shut me up.”

Zayne rose and Jay instantly fell back a few steps. “This isn’t about cutting off your air, it’s about cutting off your voice,” Zayne said, slowly advancing and he tapped the little plastic box on the collar. “It’s a shock collar.”

“Where do you keep getting this shit?!” Jay wasn’t sure if he actually wanted to know or if he was just attempting to stall.

“Next time you’re doing an interview with Emery, you should ask him.”

Okay, so he really hadn’t want to know. And stalling was no longer an option.

“Let’s try it out.” Zayne lunged forward and grabbed him by the arm.

“No, no, no! No, wait, wait!” Jay dug his heels in and resisted Zayne pulling him towards the bedroom with all his might. “What is your plan with this? Is this just because I kept you awake?! It’s not like you’ll be able to sleep with me writhing next to you!”

��I’m not sleeping over tonight,” Zayne just said.

Jay gaped at him. “Then why on earth—”

But Zayne’s sly grin widened and his eyes sparkled with a malice that told Jay all he needed to know: it was just because. Because he could. And probably with a hint of revenge.

He yelped, Zayne taking advantage of his lowered guard, and stumbled over the doorstep. Zayne only had to lightly push him to get him off balance and he landed face down on his bed. He snapped back up but a hand pushed his head down into his pillow and a knee pressed into the small of his back.

“No!” He trashed. “No, you are not getting that thing ar—” he choked on the words as Zayne slipped it under his neck and pulled hard at the ends with one hand. Jay flew up as it cut off his air, arching his back and clawing at the leather on his throat. When Zayne didn’t let up, he had to acknowledge defeat, hitting the mattress and at Zayne’s leg with his open palm in surrender.

Zayne calmly spoke over his heaving gasps as he fiddled with the clasp of the collar. “Always making things so hard on yourself,” he almost tutted.

Jay practically flinched when he heard the little click of the lock sliding home and Zayne pulled it tighter. As soon as he felt Zayne get off him, he snapped up and desperately reached towards the back of his neck, fingers searching for the clasp. But at the same time he heard Zayne’s voice, “Don’t bother”, his fingers touched over something cold dangling at the clasp.

“A tiny padlock.” Zayne smirked, and he held up the equally tiny key. “Don’t trust you when I’m not here.”

Jay reared up to yell at him, but the sudden realisation made him choke. He went very still, fingers sliding over the collar to the little box pressed snug against his throat just under his Adam’s apple. It wasn’t tight enough to make breathing difficult, but two cold metal points, the prongs, pressed uncomfortably into his throat. His eyes, desperate and filled with a sudden fear, snapped up to Zayne’s.

“See, you’re a smart pup—er, bird. Yes, that little box responds to sound waves. Speak and it will pick up on the vibrations, giving you a little shock to encourage silence. Snore and, well, same thing really,” he added with a smile.

Jay opened his mouth, wanting to know how ‘little’ that ‘little shock’ would be, but quickly closed it again not that keen on finding out immediately.

Zayne grinned, apparently pleased his plan was working already. “It’s not on. Yet.” He pulled a little remote control from his pocket. “Go on, speak.”

Sliding off the bed, Jay let out a small whimper, testing the thing out before he spoke. “I have work tomorrow,” he said in the smallest voice. He felt like crying, tears burning behind his eyes. But complaining about how unfair it all was never got him anywhere. “I can’t go with… with this around my neck.” Pain was something to expect with Zayne, but public humiliation a whole other avenue.

“Relax. I’m not sleeping over but I’ll be here tomorrow morning to unlock it.”

But that required a certain amount of trust… “Please…” he tried again. He’d rather Zayne just poked him with that fucking cattle prod whenever he started snoring at night. Anything but this. “Please, take it off. I’m sorry, sorry about tonight,” he stammered, feeling stupid for apologizing for something out of his control, “just ple—” he abruptly cut off as Zayne raised the remote in warning and pressed a button.

A little red light burned on his throat and Jay froze, swallowing his words as the device beeped.

“Go on,” Zayne stepped right in front of him, cold eyes looking down on him, voice low and sharp as a razor. “Beg.”

Jay frantically shook his head, trying to contain any whimpers. He knew Zayne just wanted to see him in pain before he left for the night.

Zayne raised a fist. “Beg or I’ll make you scream.”

His lips trembled and his eyes closed in resignation. He took a deep breath, braced himself for the pain to come. “Plea—”

He seized, body tensing up, the muscles in his neck straining against the collar, eyes widening. The shock stole his voice – luckily really – so the pain searing through him had no outlet. Heat burned at his throat, centred at the prongs, but the shock vibrated through his entire body and he was sure he felt it in his bones.

It only lasted a few seconds before it abruptly released him.

He fell to his knees and gasped hard for air.

Too hard.

“You’d better be careful,” the casual voice sounded above him as he went rigid again.

A hand shot up to clutch at his throat – as if he could tear it off – before it froze in shock half way up. The heat at his throat was so intense he was sure it would leave a mark. It shot like lightning through his veins, reaching the tips of his fingers in no time, but the tingly feeling remained even after the shock stopped again.

“I’d say that doesn’t need any adjusting,” Zayne said, a pleased grin on his face as he watched the man at his feet struggle to silently get his breath back. He crouched down, reaching out. In his haste to get away and fear that any vibration might trigger the collar, Jay shot away and fell back against the bed. Zayne gripped his chin tight and tilted it up.

Jay held his breath as his fingers slid along the plastic box, but nothing happened when Zayne checked how tight it was around his neck and if he could get a finger behind it.

“Alright then,” he said, seemingly satisfied and got to his feet, giving a small mock salute. “Have a good night.”

-

Continued here

Tag list: @just-a-whumping-racoon-with-wifi @burtlederp @castielamigos-whump-side-blog @hurtmebeautifully @rougenoirofthepurpleterror @susiequaz12 @whump-me-all-night-long @rippedjeansandfadeddreams @im-just-here-for-the-whump @restrainthenmaime @freefallingup13 @whatwasmyprevioususername @myfriendcallsmeasickwoman19 @firewheeesky @redstainedsocks @hold-back-on-the-comfort @whumpawink @break-so-beautifully @approach-me-and-ill-cry @painsandconfusion @afabulousmrtake @wormwriting @soopytime @whumpedydump @pickleking8

[sonofshu]

ㅤ

[yuriyuruandyuraart]

Opinions on Dream? :^

SO many feelings about him omgg rant under cut please forgive me

okay so i don't really talk or draw him much cause honestly,,,most of the times i just think he's a bit....boring? or more accurately plain? not in a mean way either but just in a 'fades into the background' type of way like don't get me wrong!! he's a really nice friend to his peers, his feelings about his powers and aura making his relationships harder to navigate and trust along with his whole conflict with nightmare and morality about what's good and bad IS very cool!! and i love it whenever they write him to be complex and not on this black and white mentality or when he's just straight up following along his friends with no free will or with a dubious purpose without ever addressing his issues or feelings! it's just unsatisfying to me :')

or when they're making him the 'naive' and oblivious, (sometimes childish?) character being marked as the obstacle and villain along with the other star sanses from the fic's pov, always talking about doing good things while fighting his brother and not hearing him out about the balance, (and for weak reasons most of the time. like it's been so long and you STILL haven't sat down with him when he's, generally, basically begged you to just have a talk? guys please :'( ) or when they go for the victim sad dream always missing the old nightmare, where corrupted nightmare is the incarnation of evil, with no sympathy or emotion except anger and sadistic glee, killing and hurting everyone and dream's just trying to protect the multiverse and dream's always been in the right. such extremes!!!

LIKE!! i hope i'm not the only one that thinks a 500+ year old should have had enough time to idk. learn things? about people and manipulation and deceit? after knowing what the villagers did to night? about the bad things in the world and how there's a lot of grey areas in life and that he maybe reflected on his past enough to process and ask himself if there should to be a convo to settle his differences with nightmare (and you can make nightmare the stubborn one too! or have them BOTH be petty and imperfect and have some things wrong and some right at the same time like why do i always see the good guy vs bad guy cliché with these two when they're the perfect example of why positivity doesn't have meaning without the negativity!! as long as there's a satisfying evolution or growth that doesn't leave me empty i'm good yknow?)

plus i believe dream really isn't as dumb as people view him. i do get some of you saying he probably can't read or write since that's actually a pretty interesting idea to explore! but in general please let him have emotions other than pure sunshiny happiness or endless sadness like he's gotta have more depth than that! let him make mistakes, have flaws that don't just make him the bad guy that's always in the wrong by default, and be angry or suspicious or jealous or bitter or battling his mental health problems/depression or malicious or smart or witty or mischievous and silly or sarcastic or ANYTHING dude i just want him to be put into different scenarios where he can be serious or lighthearted like it doesn't even have to be long or perfect but make him feel real.

it could definitely be that i don't read or see much art about dream or really look for it hard enough but also i just. i feel bad for even saying this fr and i wanna be honest about why i don't enjoy most stories about him cause he always gets the worst treatment along with ink!!! especially ink omg the poor guy has it the worst i think like wow do they mess him up :'(

always one dimensional in non shippy fics, or too plain or easily replaceable by other, more entertaining people in the significant other's life in most of his ships like man. i have read fics out there that made me genuinely FEEL and root for him and love his character so much it restored all hope for me!!! but i can only name one on top of my head and the others? it's been so long i don't even remember their names i just legit feel terrible cause i love him still and i can't find many headcanons that fit my interpretation of him yknow?

not to say people who write him very happy, mislead or sad are ruining him like that's silly- if i see something i don't like i just. move on bro i wouldn't force people to feel or think the same way i do about him cause anyone can have whatever headcanons they want!!! just talking about what i personally look for in him and why i can't exactly find it since most of the stuff out there just isn't my cup of tea :')

hopefully i didn't set anyone off with this rambling opinionated essay i just pulled hhh xD i know i know he's a popular character and i know a lot of people like dream so *sobs* please please recommend me artists and fics about him that you think is good it's been so looong since i've read or seen anything new that makes me attached to this little guy aughg<33333

[walliswithawhy]

[sysig]

Lose myself to you (Patreon)

[seahydra]

Aaahhhhhh I forgot I have teeth extraction tomorrow. Hell world

[larryrickard]

i had a dream that i made little cards that say "THEY!" on them that i handed out to people at work who got my pronouns wrong, immediately after they got it wrong. and in smaller text (or on the back) it said "i don't want an apology, i want you to do better" or "don't say you're sorry, DO BETTER" and ..... i kind of want to do it. maybe i'll get some moo cards made lmao

various scenarios included:

me slamming it down on a desk in front of them.

instead i had stickers, would slowly peel one off while they watched, and stick it on it on them.

handing out a quarter sheet piece of paper based on the 'i caught being good' tags we'd get in kindergarten which said 'i got caught misgendering hallie/my coworker'. it would have their name and date on it and a giant 🙁 face. i had them as a pad of paper and would hold up a finger to say 'wait a second', dramatically pull it out of my back pocket, take my pen out of another pocket, slowly fill it out in front of them, and hand it to them while staring them in the eyes.

getting a whiteboard for the outer side of my cubicle wall that said '[days] since i was misgendred' (with a bonus by saying 'last offender: [name]'

i also dreamt that i got into trouble for it because i was making people feel bad and was 'creating a hostile work environment'. i was just like.... okay and how do you think i feel? and my boss shut up real fuckin quick. dunno if that would be the case irl but if that does happen i can only dream.