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foryouthegays · 4 years

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techno liveblog w timestamps lets go for ‘a new home (dream SMP)’ stream

good laugh times: 00:13:50, 00:14:55, 1:38:45, ik it doesnt look like a lot but like u should watch the stream anyway bc philzas there and his laugh is amazing and they just go so well together

times techno calls phil his friend: 00:6:00 00:37:00, 00:45:17, 0:1:09:30, 01:11:15, 01:26:35, 01:50:05, 2:35:00

FSDJKFAF;LS HE KEPT THE MUTED INTRO IN JHKADFLS (ends at 00:1:25)

i like how, when faced with Leaving Youtube, techno would choose to be an author. i want a book by techno. reblog this if u want a book by techno (with an audiobook by him as well) /hj. 00:1:33

i love how he says ehhhhhh so much lskjhdfas (abt 2 mins in)

who the FUCK just remembers that the word fortuitous exists wtf 00:5:17

00:7:45 PHILZA TIME PHILZA TIME LETS GO

00:8:55 tommy time :/

0:14:10 rANBOO JUST WALKS IN, LOOKS AROUN ,AND LEA VE SIM CRYING

i love how much philza laughs at technos jokes bc pretty much everything he says IS a joke he just says it in such a serious voice that p much everyone else is like,,,yeah,,,,yup,,,,and phil just knows when hes joking and his laugh is so good with technos voice. sbi? whos that? i only know philza and technoblade

00:19:30 ghostbur joins! this is my first time hearin ghostbur btw

00:19:40 haha string axe technos so bad at crafting what a fool /j

00:21:07 ghostbur: “Even I remember how to make a fishing rod!” ghostbur u just MURDERED technoblade oh my god im gonna scream hgjdfksla i love ghostbur so much

00:23:55: GHOSTBUR NO!! DON’T DIE YOU’LL BECOME A DOUBLE GHOST!!!! -technoblade 2020

00:24:55 technoblade neva lies -guys he almost did the technoblade neva dies ahh!!!!!

i havent heard anyone talk about this but techno has a dedicated roleplay voice. like listen to him talk to tommy at 00:25:08. his voice gets more even, he uses names a lot more often (seriously, listen to his theseus speech. he says tommy so often, its incredible.), and his voice gets,,,,deeper? not deeper but smoother, in a way, and he repeats what he says for emphasis instead of humor. and his voice is louder, and he seems more assertive.

00:27:30 philza: where we goin, by the way? techno: to our- to my new home.

techno cmon let phil live w u wed get so much more content cmonn

00:28:50 the fact that he calls the manhunt theme “dream music” makes me laugh so hard. and then his version of it,,,,,m love he (also he sings it here and at 01:14:20)

00:35:10 why is ranboo so cryptic im-

why does he just casually know the word sentry wh at i hate him 00:39:45

this is the worst sentence (structurally) ive ever heard techno say im gonna cry 00:49:33 ‘im too busy thinkin of new ideas to sleep so i could actually execute them’ and tubbos *oh?* after is just hdsfgkjlka

LKSJDHFJK 00:51:49

00:54:30

techno: thats one of dreams powers, he can just stop the rain

tubbo, quietly: like jesus!

i love them sm dsfhkjla they kept going but i jus gdfhjksa jesus has op

techno @ being the second worst thing to ever happen to those orphans: haha funnie!!

techno @ having fun w religious stuff: i wILL BE CANCELLED NO-

00:58:10 “hey if ur [ghostbur] a ghost, do instant damage potions heal you now?” “...no,, they hurt me still :(” DSIULZKJHFSLKFJH

01:04:00 his brother named the cow bob im- aww

also he has a fanart wall again!!!

01:09:30 “phil, you’re the only friend i have left in this world.” aWWWWW HE GAVE HIM THE COMPASS

“dont smoke, it’s a joke” -technoblade 01:14:15

ROLEPLAY SPEECH VOICE IS BACK AT 1:16:10 “they pillage my base for everything i’m worth, they use me for the revolution, but oooOOOoo i took a pickaxe with his consent? oOOOooOo i’m a thief!”

holy shit 01:17:15 “you know what, phil? for you, the world, alright? it’s fine.” oH MY GOD HHHHGHG (context, right before they were arguing bc phil took some blocks from his base and techno thought that when he said phil could take anything he meant from the chests)

the COMIDY of that villager coming in and sleeping while techno was readin donos at 01:22:05 RIGHT AFTER phil freaked out abt inturruptin his dono readin im SFDHKJLA:

techno talkin bout the winstreak and how he wont be able to live up to that sort of playin at 01:22:30ish is super important and ill transcribe it tomorrow, but if u can id highly rec watchin it.

01:24:20 “[readin dono] what’s your favorite movie? uh, the princess bride is pretty good” techno ily that movie rocks also he said it so fast like hes ashamed of it noo

techno says no to canon ranboo son btw! 01:25:30

01:25:55 “i wasnt in that story, therefore it doesnt matter” all of technoblr be like

01:37:49 is great lemmie transcribe

“how have you still not gotten a second monitor?? holy shit.”

“let me tell you something. and im only telling you this because i know that so many people in the chat are gonna be furious. so i recently realized- i think the second monitor can just be any ol’ monitor, right? you literally just plug it in, and its set up? well i mean you have to turn on some settings, but like, thats it, or something?”

“yeah,,,,, uh techno you fuckin destroyed my chat, by the way, oh my god, [earlier techno told his viewers to twitch prime philza] there has been like 40 primes just flying through”

“yeahhh twitch prime!!! twitch prime philza yeahh!!! so anyways the other day, i like, i looked to my left, and realized that my old monitor has been like, five feet away from where i sit and stream for the last three years?”

“oh my god...”

“so i- i literally do not have to leave my room to set up a second monitor and i havent. and i’m still usin my laptop for this stream.

“is this gonna be one of those situations where you like, you have a thing, you just refuse to do the thing?”

“listen, my desk is-

“yOU STILL HAVENT OPENED UP THE HYPIXEL PACKAGE!!!”

“AHHHH I HAVENT OPENED UP THE HYPIXEL PACKAGE! I HAVENT EVEN OPENED UP MY MCC COIN! DUDE I HAVENT EVEN OPENED UP MY ONE MILLION SUBSCRIBER PLAQUE! ITS STILL THERE RIGHT BEHIND ME! ITs sTILL IN THE BOX! i never made a video on it....”

“bruhhhhh [philza laughs] thats FREE VIEWS what are you doing??”

“ill open it at 8 mil :/.”

“you could LITERALLY make a video of you just like, throwing it off a wall, and then thumbing up, like doing a thumbs up, and then that would be it. 10 seconds. ten seconds. thumb and elbow in shot. [laughs]”

techno is such a disaster i love him

01:34:18 the way techno says “tommy, that statement has NEVER been true” i dont like sayin i simp for block men but GOD sometimes his voice is nicer than usual hhhgn

“man i sure wish tommyinnit was in this stream” -nobody ever (just after previous timestamp)

01:40:15 is fuckin hilarious and im actually crying oh my god techno just says things and says them well with a completely straight face how does he do it

i cannot WAIT until theres a president w the last/first name andy so we can say president andy and think abt technoblade

IM CRIASDNGUSFHD 01:44:38 PHILZA LOOK OUT LOOK OUT PHILZA LSKJDAFJASD;LKF

i love when techno talks abt his vids. like u can tell he puts a lot of thought into the vids (esp these ones) and like at 01:47:00 he talks abt the “I DIDNT PUT DEAPTH STRIDER ON THOSE BOOTS, FUNDY!” and how its just that creepin realization that you were doomed from the start and how he made the armor, he isnt intimidated by the netherite bc he didnt enchant it all the way and only he knows that,,, and i just,,,hgg he

he reveals that hes writin the next arc at 01:48:00: “oh, speakin of arcs, chat, i’m writing the next arc. so, you know. hope nothin bad happens in two weeks, chat!” IM SO EXCITED like he clearly has his character fleshed out and is SO good at writing and retellin history im so so excited to see where he takes it AHHHH and also taht means he might stream more bc he might make his character more important (keep in mind this is the guy who wrote self insert hypixel fanfics. he has no shame in puttin himself first and i respect him so much for it)

01:51:20 “they’re tryin to get a second customer but they’re riskin their first” is lowkey a good line

has anyone else noticed that techno says wise a lot? like at 01:55:10 he literally says “wise dragon armor” as a joke but like i think he says wise so much BECAUSE of skyblock like hjkfdsla

01:57:30 techno plea se eat

ok 1:58:45 is hilarious and all but at the end of his ramble he says “come back, i miss you” and lowkey im crying

techno needs to stop knowing his audience more than we know ourselves im hsfkjda 02:05:25 “the chat’s spammin ‘eat technoblade, eat!’ like they’re not gonna start, like, theyre not gonna get super sad if i ended the stream right now, like theyre not gonna all cry ‘i miss technoblade *sniffs* why- whyd he leave to eat food, why did he listen to our advice noooo’”

02:14:50 NEW VIDEO POGGGG CARL THE HORSE POGGGGGG NOT A STREAM HIGHLIGHT POGGGGG

02:17:40 “i could start a potato farm out here to show how much ive changed” techno last time u made a potato farm u started an entire war that lasted a year that does NOT say calm and retired to me lskgdfjagsldj

02:23:00 why does techno just reference greek mythology so much. makin me scared for his arc.

also he talks abt smp earth a lot in this stream i love it so much

i also just. love?? how much sbi respect tommy like they bully him but when talkin bout him they just have so much respect for how much work he puts into youtube and i just,,,,hgnn they r friends

02:33:13 sbi streamer house lets go cmon

02:34:15 “i think if i streamed every day i could keep up” on one hand YE S but on the ohter oh god techno no we have to keep up tho

hearing techno say “violence isnt the answer” is so scary 02:35:40

02:37:30 technosneeze

hiS BROTHER SENT HIM 46 DISCORD MESSAGES SFKDJLFLKASF 2:49:25 i love his end screen so much hes just sadness,,,,retirement,,,t,echnoblade,,,the government is going to fall on its own due to lack of organization and ideals,,,,,,subscribe,,,,,sadness,,,,,also 2:50:45 is making me laugh so hard its just sad music and technos like??? whys phil in my house drinking milk?????

overall, fantastic stream, if ya want some chill techno philza content i highly recommend.

#stream post

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valkyrieskwad · 4 years

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I HAD A DREAM ABOUT ROJASCORP FUCKING AGAINST A FRIDGERATOR IM FREAKING OUT

here you go, my friend. dreams do come true.

you want it all (but you can't have it)

AO3 LINK

tagging @narraboths just because.

___________

Miraculously, the only thing keeping Lena from dying of sexual frustration is the heat.

It is so fucking hot outside: hot enough that the tiny summer house that her and Andrea call "the hotbox" feels more like the devil’s armpit during a Vegas trip, hot enough that they’ve started sitting in lawn chairs in the garage, taking turns sticking their heads in the deep freezer as Andrea tries her best to get Lena into Faith No More, singing while the sun goes down.

It’s hot enough that Lena’s hair is sweated to the back of her neck and her clothes are sticking to her skin, and even though they’ve been drinking since the late afternoon, the beers still aren’t managing to settle concretely in their system. Not like Lena wants them to, at least.

She wants to be drunk. She wants them both to be drunk, both at that point where the world is twirling and nothing really matters because everything is fucking funny, at that point where Lena could open her mouth and say i sometimes think about you when i touch myself, and Andrea would just throw her head back and laugh at it while Lena thinks about putting hickeys on her neck.

But they’re not drunk.

They’re both tipsy at best, and fucking touch-starved, and Lena hasn’t shaved in three weeks because it all seems less important when she’s down to showering every two days. She doesn’t know how much longer she can survive this quarantine, like jesus fuck. If the heat doesn’t kill her, the fact that she hasn’t been having sex with Andrea probably will.

"If I could only listen to five songs for the rest of my life, this song would definitely be one of them," Andrea says, pulling her knees to her chest and resting her feet on her lawn chair. "It’s amazing, right?"

Lena doesn’t really care for it, so instead of answering she asks, "Which one is this again?"

"Lena," Andrea drags out, letting her feet fall back to the garage floor. Truthfully, Lena knows the song, but listening to Andrea talk about music is almost as good as getting to touch her. "It’s Epic. It’s pretty much the one song you need to know even if you forget everything else. Mike Patton rapping is so fucking infectious, I swear. Another day of listening and you’ll be singing along."

"I’m sure," Lena smiles, then Andrea smiles too, and it makes Lena’s belly drop thinking about licking her lips. "Is it my turn for the deep freezer or did I go last? I can’t remember anymore, too fucking hot to think."

"Who knows," Andrea shrugs, sighing and settling back in her chair. "If you want it, it’s yours. I think I’ve given up trying to survive and accepted defeat."

"I’m almost there with you," Lena says, fumbling out of her chair, leaving her beer on the floor as she walks over to the deep freezer. It’ll be too warm to drink by the time she goes back to it, but it’s too hot to care about how much she’s been wasting all day. She throws the lid to the freezer open and leans inside of it. "We’ve had the air fixed twice, why’s it still not working?"

"Maybe we’re being punished for something we did in an alternate universe," Andrea says, and her voice feels closer, Lena thinks, right before she feels Andrea sliding next to her. They decided earlier that it was too hot to share the freezer, but maybe Andrea’s forgotten about that. "Do you think we’re friends everywhere in the multiverse?"

"I don’t think I could ever not love you," Lena responds without thinking about it, and then her body flushes so fast she feels prickly all over. It’s not even a big deal, she tells Andrea she loves her every day, but in her heart she knows it’s not what she meant this time.

Still, she lets it sit between them.

Andrea just hums for a second, then she says, "Yeah, I don’t think I could ever not be with you, like. Fuck, it’s so dumb, but sometimes when I look at you, I feel like, I don’t know." She laughs a little, then she finishes the sentence— "I just feel how Adam must have felt looking at Eve, like you were made from a part of me or something."

"Oh?" Lena asks.

"Yeah, it’s fucking stupid, sorry," Andrea gushes. "Is it too weird? It’s too weird."

"No," Lena says fast, and then, before she can stop herself, "I think about you sometimes when I touch myself, so. You’re not weird, I am."

"That’s not weird," Andrea says, so fucking nonchalant, and Lena makes the mistake of twisting her head to see the crisp blue of her eyes. "I mean, I think about you too when I do it. It’s just normal, right?"

"I guess it is," Lena mumbles, heart in her fucking throat, belly twisting in knots imagining Andrea imagining her when she’s, god. Lena looks away, drops her head further in the freezer, not blinking until the cold starts to sting her eyes. Fuck it. "I think about kissing you, too. All the time. I can’t help it. Sometimes sitting next to you on the couch, I just. My mind gets stuck on it, you know? Like, what if we made out?"

"What if we made out?" Andrea says back, and Lena’s ears burn the three seconds she thinks she’s being mocked, before it hits her that Andrea’s actually asking.

"What?" she asks, lifting her head again, looking at Andrea again, drinking in her eyes and her lips, and her lips, with very little regard for subtlety. "What do you mean?"

"Make out with me," Andrea shrugs. "I mean, we have shit else to do, so."

Lena wants to kiss her with every single fiber of her being, and that's maybe why she shouldn't. She stands up straight, turns toward Andrea, and starts with, "Andy," to let her know she's being serious. "I was just saying. We don't have to, though."

"But I want to," Andrea says, and it's hard to argue when she's three inches away, when she puts her hands on Lena's hips, hot against her skin even through her tank top. "I know you want to, too. You just said."

"Okay,” Lena says, and she's not sure what to do with her own hands. She knows what she wants to do, wants them in Andrea's hair, wants to feel her, to touch her, to explore every inch of her until they find a way to melt together in this fucking heat. But she's not exactly sure what's appropriate.

"It's okay, just go with it," Andrea says, and then she leans in and kisses Lena, and Lena's hands find a way to her hair, anyway.

She wants to describe the kiss. She wants to be able to think about it as they do it, so she has a reference point, a way to go back to it in her brain and replay and replay and replay it later. But she can't think. Her body feels like one giant nerve as Andrea spreads her hands out across her back and ass and skin, tasting Lena's lips, licking in her mouth, making it so hot between them that Lena feels like she has to choose between kissing and breathing. Between living and dying to live.

It gets more intense by the second, though, more frantic desperate needy, until they're both grabbing at anything they can, breath hot, lips and teeth and spit clashing between them.

"Fuck," Andrea pulls away, then her voice drops as she whispers, "C'mere," and Lena's heart stops beating as Andrea undoes the string on her shorts. Everything is moving so fast and so slow, like time doesn't know what to do, like they're dodging bullets in the Matrix. "I wanna touch you, is that okay?"

"Um," Lena says, rough like she's out of breath suddenly, heat tugging her belly so low it only aggravates the pulsing between her thighs. "I haven’t um, in a while," she mumbles, dumbly, hoping Andrea gets what she means.

Andrea laughs, pressing their mouths together again to kiss Lena, hand slipping beneath the elastic of Lena's boyshorts. "I literally could not care less," she says against Lena's mouth. "Let me touch you."

"Okay," Lena agrees. "But, pretend you like it. Tell me only hipsters prefer hardwood over carpet."

Andrea laughs again, this time deep, from somewhere in her belly. Lena laughs, too. The way she only does with Andrea on a hot summer night, standing over the blast of the deep freezer with the garage door half-open. "I don't have to pretend," Andrea tells her, fingers inching down until she finds Lena's clit, skin practically burning against it. "I love every second of this."

Fuck, Andrea makes it feel so familiar, like it's just another Tuesday and Lena's not slow riding her hand as she gasps against her mouth. She makes it feel like it's okay to be doing this, like Lena's safe and can be open, soft, vulnerable. She makes it feel like everything is okay, so the longer they shift together—kissing touching moaning—the more Lena feels like it's safe to want more. "I want you inside of me," she whispers, seconds or minutes or seriously, what the fuck is time later, hot and slick and so fucking sweaty that Andrea's hair is damp twisted in her hand.

"You want to go upstairs?"

"I think I'd die, fuck, m'already drenched in more than just the intended way."

"Here," Andrea giggles, pulling away a bit and nudging Lena's hip until she turns. And then Lena's being leaned over the deep freezer, thinking god this feels fucking amazing just as Andrea starts to tug her shorts down. "We could do it like this," she says. "You want that?"

"Yeah," Lena breathes, letting her head drop lower. "I want it."

So, Andrea gives it to her, slowly at first. Just one finger and then two, and then Lena's rocking back against her fast enough her mind is blanking and no amount of cold could make her feel less hot. She comes like that, over the freezer, with Andrea inside her, sweat and tears, probably, dripping down her face.

"You're so fucking hot," Andrea says, spreading her hand over Lena's ass, and Lena feels like she's breaking. But she also feels content for once, like she's settling, like her well isn't so full it's overflowing anymore.

She feels good. She feels so fucking hot she wants to strip even her skin off, but she feels good.

#supergirl #rojascorp #andrea rojas #lena luthor #my writing #asks #anonymous #Anonymous

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long-bodyswap · 4 years

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Yotta Life

(Im sorry I don’t have the credits, but if you know the author you can @)

It’s been an adjustment lately getting used to all this fame and attention since Adele’s new album came out. The whole world knew it would be huge, but even the most optimistic among us couldn’t have imagined that it would have the best selling first week sales of any album in history! With massive, iconic numbers like that, it was only natural that she would need more security while she goes on her whirlwind press promo, and I’m the best in the business- ermmm- I mean technically my host, Peter Van der Veen is the best in the business, but it’s not like anyone could tell the difference since the spell I used gave me access to all of his memories, training, and personality traits. No one has suspected a thing, and I’ve been inside Peter since he was Lady Gaga’s bodyguard!Possessing the top bodyguard for the stars has been a dream come true because I’ve met and spent time with almost all of my idols. Gaga is much more normal in private than people give her credit for, but my favorite client so far has been Adele, BY FAR. Never have I ever met such a witty, sweet, funny as shit, monumentally talented, and down to earth person. Rumor has it she used to be quite the drinker before she had her baby, but every now and then she’s whipped out a little reward for the road with her team, meaning I was naturally drawn into the fun. IIt’s been simply remarkable getting to know Adele and honestly consider her a friend. She’s so honest and personable that I catch myself shifting out of Peter’s stern persona, dropping sass and giggling to her jokes. I remind myself often that it’s only acceptable around Adele, but anyone who had previously known Peter would be immensely suspicious. Still, it’s been the single most meaningful (and lucrative) gig I’ve ever done. You can see that I try my hardest to remain stern and serious. It’s so hard because even her commentary during casual conversation is adorable and hilarious enough to make a stone gargoyle let out a good chuckle. Sometimes it honestly is too much and I can’t help but smile and join in the silliness. It’s comforting at least to know that Peter’s smile looks so fucking sexy- almost as sexy as his stern smolder.

The bulk of the promo circuit ended in December so now that it’s January 2016, I finally have some time to myself. Adele thanked me profusely for my service and friendship and begged me to free up my schedule so I could join her when her tour starts in April. I promised her I’d lock in the dates, but it’s going to be nice to have some time to have fun behind closed doors…At the very least it’ll be nice to show off this body.Fuck, what a great day. I’m rocking this perfect bronze and I can finally show off this sculpted body. I work ridiculously hard to keep it up to Peter’s standards, but it’s so worth it. Peter’s body looks sexy as hell in a suit, but it was meant to be seen and envied by others. And the Adele gig was so lucrative that I’m set to be enjoying the next four months shirtless and glistening at this Mexican resort. I used this morning to do a power workout of sprints and chest interval training in a nearby canyon, and then I rewarded myself with a nice afternoon spent relaxing at the beach.Peter’s sore muscles always made me horny for some reason, which meant that I was on edge almost all day every day…I didn’t mind though. It reminded me of how powerful and full of my vitality my host was. What I did mind though was burning in this hot sun. Noticing a cute boy eyeing me, I saw an opportunity to kill two birds with one stone. The adorable fucker looked about my real age, but way better looking, not that that mattered since I was inhabiting Mr. Europe 2005. Being bisexual, I’ve been able to use Peter’s body to anonymously fuck around with hotties from all over the world, but I’ve gotta say I’ve developed a strong preference for boys, so let’s test the waters and see if this kid wants a taste of the premier bodyguard to the stars.“Hey, kid.” I said in a deep, yet friendly tone. “You got a sec to help me out with something?” I made sure to flash him a subtle smile, also pulling my shades down so he could see the twinkle in my beautiful eyes. It only took me a second to realize I had him hook, line, and sinker.That big smile was one thing, but I had also completely stopped him in his tracks. He was walking back over to me without a single hesitation. “What can I do for you?” The chap asked with a friendly tone that was masking what I, after maaaanyy similar encounters, knew was lust.“You see, I’m going to start burning soon, so could you help me with a fresh layer of sunblock?”He kept his jaw from dropping, but I knew he was shocked and ecstatic. “You mean, on your back?” He asked, treading cautiously.“Actually, I was hoping you could help me with the whole thing,” I said, pointing out my sculpted chest and abs before biting my lip in a fake show of nervous anticipation.

The boy paused to think for a second before smiling again and walking over. “Sure, I’d love to help out,” he said in a way that tried to make it sound like he was just doing a normal favor for a stranger.

I grinned in relief before putting my shades back on and getting out my tube of sunblock. I laid down, making sure to get comfortable before I took a second to adjust my junk since I was about a quarter hard from the sheer testosterone pumping through my veins.

“Sorry about that,” I said before getting relaxed again. “Had a brutal workout this morning. Always gets the testosterone flowing, if you know what I mean.”“I could tell you had a good workout this morning. You’ve got the pumped look. Maybe you can share some workout tips- I’m trying to bulk up, but it’s been kinda hard.”“Son, you don’t need to add a single pound of mass. The lean look is really sexy on you.” I said that right as he popped the cap open, making him blush before he squeezed a healthy helping of that cream into his hands.

“That’s easy for you to say,” he said before slathering that cream on my abs. I shivered and gasped from the cold, tightening my core from the surprise, but he kept talking. “Especially when you have a body like this.”As far as I could tell, he had no idea who I was, so it was safe to see if I could push his buttons a little.As he spread the cream over Peter’s ripped abs, I quietly moaned from the feeling of those smooth fingers rubbing that coconut scented goodness into my stolen skin. The look on this boy’s face was one of inner conflict. He didn’t know if he should go a little further, but he finally got my subtle hint and began rubbing me more purposefully until he was giving my abs a slow and deep massage.

“You have…so much definition,” he marveled as he worked his strong fingers more and more expertly. “mmmmmmm that feels so good, kid. Guess you could tell that yesterday was ab day,” By this point his constant touch had me more than half hard. He definitely noticed my long and thick cock growing in my shorts, but he didn’t back away. He started massaging me even more purposefully, sensually even. Damn, this kid had some kink in him.

“And I’d bet money you did a chest day today,” he said slowly and smoothly as he began working his magical hands up to my muscular slabs of pec perfection. I moaned louder this time as he worked his hands up to my chest so he was grabbing a pec with each hand, squeezing firmly enough to loosen up those stiff muscles. He squeezed harder, massaging my sore chest and making me groan in a mix of ecstasy and agony. I was shocked though as he, without stopping his deep tissue chest massage, began to gently flick and rub my nipples with his thumbs. I inhaled deeply, feeling my cock twitch and continue to engorge as this boy worked Peter’s incredibly sensitive nipples. My breathing picked up, getting slightly faster before this kid made his big move. I gasped loudly as he leaned down and began sucking on one of my nipples before reaching the other hand down to rub my cock through my shorts, making it pulsate and swell to full hardness.

“Unnnngggg,” I groaned as I looked down at this cutie with thick, bushy eyebrows give in to his hunger for cock, specifically my cock. I gasped again as he gripped my cock through the shorts, feeling the thickness of my girth and the obvious length before smiling, apparently satisfied with Peter’s thick 8.5 inches. “If you wanted me, you should have just said so,” he whispered seductively into my ear.

I knocked the big tube of sunscreen onto the sand before grabbing him and pulling him on top of my powerful chest, enjoying the weight of his body against my greased up chest. I brought my mouth to his and he eagerly opened as I locked our lips and brought our tongues into a dance of lust. Fuck, he tasted so minty. My rock hard cock pulsated as I humped my crotch up against his, feeling his hard dick rub back against mine as I let us get lost in the lust. FInally breaking the kiss, I told him, “I have a room,” barely having the breath to make the sentence. He just smiled before we made a mad dash to pick up our shit and cover our raging hard ons as we ran back to the hotel. I woke up the next morning alone int he bed except for a little note that had a phone number and the name Zac. Man, last night was crazy. I mean, I’ve done some kinky shit with Peter’s body, but I think I blew four of Peter’s loads into that boy last night. Yeah, there was the load when I was fucking him doggy style. Then another when I was fucking him missionary. The third one was when he was riding me. mmmmm, the last one was my favorite. I pinned that kid against the wall with my strong arms and bounced him up and down off my powerful thrusts until I finally blew that last load so deep inside him. On that one things got so intense. Zac was hollering and almost hyperventilating my cock made him feel so good. He didn’t even touch his dick that time since he was scratching at the wall the whole time, but his cock still blew a load all over the two of us. That was about when I hit my limit. I remember roaring so loud I thought the walls were vibrating before finally, dripping in sweat and muscles and veins bulging all over my body, I blew all of the remaining cum in Peter’s balls so deep into that boy. When I calmed down, I carried the boy back to the bed and we both laid there making out and squirming from the afterglow of our orgasms before passing out from our multi-hour fuckfest.

I smirked as I thought to myself how this would be my life for the next four months. I got up and walked over to mirror, admiring my boxer-clad vessel, still just as high off of the beauty of this stolen body as I was two years ago when I first took Peter over.

“You’re one sexy man,” I said to the reflection before winking. God damn, seeing Peter’s body respond to my actions was still so satisfying. I felt a fluttery sensation deep in my gut before blushing from the sight of the sexy body in front of me. Mmmmmm yeah, Peter might be a strong and tough man, but I can always make him do whatever I want because he’s powerless with me inside.

“Don’t ever forget that you’re too weak to resist me. You couldn’t do a thing to stop my soul from slipping inside you and stealing you,” I taunted his reflection as I leaned his head down to his pit and huffed in his manly sweat and stench from yesterday’s workout and fuckfest.

“You smell like a real man,” I said with appreciation before I stripped off the boxers and brought them up to my face which instantly scrunched up into one of ecstasy, huffing in the crotch area, almost coughing from the power of the manly muskiness. It was so fucking masculine and sexy, and it always got me hard.“That turns you on doesn’t it, you kinky queer?” I asked his reflection before I brought my lips to the mirror and pretended to make out with Peter. My heart sank though as the cold glass reminded me that I was on the other side. Sure, I could take over some other stud for a night and use my powers to mind control Peter into having a wild night of passion, but it takes me a lot of time to build up the energy to switch, so I only like to switch sparingly. I need at least three months to build up the necessary energy, so I don’t use the gift for casual flings. No. It’s a commitment, so the stolen life has to be perfect. I stayed in Peter for the last two years because life has been so perfect, but it would be nice to finally feel and taste his body from the other side…Still, I’d need to find the perfect body and life in the next week or two in order to have enough time to get back inside Peter in time for Adele’s tour. I guess I’ll just have to wait until after the tour…My frustration built, and I decided to take it out on Peter. Even though I knew he was blacked out, I liked to pretend he was aware of everything when I got mad. Grabbing his semi-hard cock, I pumped it until I got it back up to full hardness, watching myself make angry, yet sexy and turned on faces in the mirror as I pumped myself mercilessly.

“Yeah! You like that you queer slut?! I’m gonna make you eat every drop of this cum! unnnnngggggggg it’s gonna taste so fucking good, you fag! Who’s the tough guy now, you freaky fag? Can’t believe a tough guy like you is gonna eat your own load like some queer cum whore!” God, this always made me feel so turned on and so much better. I was getting close to orgasm when the phone rang. I instantly clicked ignore, but it started ringing again. I growled as I clicked ignore a second time, but the damn phone rang a third time. Cursing, I let go of Peter’s cock and switched to his professional voice as I answered the phone.

Even though I was initially annoyed, I was so glad I picked up the phone. Smiling from ear to ear, I listened to a very special new client ask for my services over the next three and a half months. Apparently he needed extra security for his wife, so tomorrow I would be on an early morning flight to Beverly Hills. My vacation wasn’t over, it was just moving to another locale…and I’d finally have the chance to taste Peter’s lips and mouth from another perspective.Fuck, I was so excited I went back to pumping Peter’s cock. I ate his load, this time to celebrate! Now it’s time for me to get cleaned up, buy tickets, and pack!It was so lucky to get that call from Bastian Gillmeier, or Bastian Yotta as the media and instagram know him. couldn’t help but enjoy one more early morning walk in Peter’s body, happily flaunting his muscles as I left shirtless and enjoyed the feeling of the breeze on his skin. But then I checked his watched and realized how late I was.

“Shit! Better get back and shower. Gotta get to the airport. Damn, I won’t even have time to yank out one last load!” I quickly cleaned up and called for a cab, and before I knew it I had checked in and boarded my plane en route to Beverly Hills. Still, I was frustrated by this libido and the desire, no, the NEED to feel Peter’s cock be relieved one last time. It was one of those rare flights where it was barely at half capacity, and somehow I was the only one in the first class section. This airline was my favorite too because instead of thin curtains separating first class from economy, there were actual doors, affording me a much greater sense of privacy. Still, I didn’t feel comfortable pumping a load out with that cute flight attendant around. With me being the only client, he was checking on me practically every ten minutes, and I wanted to make this last. I thought about going in the lavatory, but there was something so nasty and classless about that. No. I guess I’d need to test the sensibilities of this handsome flight attendant. Maybe he could even help me out.

I looked behind me and predictably saw him waiting there with a puppy like grin, waiting to please me. “Would you like another drink, sir?”I flashed him an enticing grin as I thought pensively. “That does sound refreshing,” I remark as I subtly relax in my seat, getting more comfortable and spreading my legs just a little. “Another barcardi and coke?”“I don’t know. I’m craving something a little different. I’m just so on edge. I could really use something to help me unwind,” I say breathy as I rub my hands in between my thighs and groan lightly. This boy gulps loudly, nervously adjusting his tie. “W-w-well…We have mojitos.”“No…that’s not what I want…” I say with a husky tone as I look him directly in his eyes, licking my lips while I rub my host’s crotch, groaning slightly more loudly as I feel this meat starting to get hard and strain within the confines of its denim prison.

“Sir! This is inappropriate! I’m going to need to ask you to-”“Shut up and touch it. I know you want to. Your cock can’t lie to me. “SIR. If you don’t stop I’m going to have to-HUH?!” he gasped as I grabbed a hold of his arm and yanked him close to me.He was speechless from the shock as I pulled him onto my lap, keeping him firmly locked in my grip thanks to Peter’s strong muscles as I went to work grinding my tented crotch against his backside and reaching my hand around to begin rubbing his engorging cock. “MMMMmmmmmmpppphhhhhhhhhhmmmmmnnngggggggg” he groaned through Peter’s big hand that was muffling his shouts.

He squealed as I grabbed a firm hold around his rod, stroking and pumping him through his soft uniform pants, breathing hot on his neck as I whispered into his ear. “You’re getting so horny, boy. I can feel you getting hard in my hand. mmmmmm a tasty boy like you is just the refreshment I needed.” I followed by licking up and down his neck, making him gasp as shivers coursed their way up and down his spine. “You liked that didn’t you?” I asked with a chuckle before experimenting and easing up my grip on his mouth.

He took several deep breaths before slowly turning his head to face me. It could have gone either way at this point as I saw the panic and indecision in his eyes. But then the look in his eyes focused in and I knew he has made his decision.

He lunged as he joined his mouth with mine, moaning loudly into my mouth as he wrestled his tongue past my lips and hungrily tasted me. I needed to remind him who the big man was in this steamy moment, so I forced Peter’s tongue into this boy’s mouth, reveling in the pleasurable moans echoing into my mouth as I ferociously tasted my mile high slut. Pulling back, he now had a look of hunger in his eyes. “I-I’ve never done this before at work…”“It’s just the two of us in here. No need to worry about anything.”He looked into my eyes briefly before biting his lip nervously.“Can I…taste it?” He asked with such anticipation in his eyes. I just smirked at him. “You think I’d say no to a hot mouth like yours? Get to work, boy.”I closed my eyes, smiling with satisfaction as this boy crawled down onto his knees, no longer able to suppress his desire as he unbuttoned my jeans and pulled down the zipper. I lifted my butt up to help him as he pulled down my pants and drawers, letting this big fat cock spring out, slapping him lightly in the face as he gawked at my host’s unveiled meat.

I shivered as he immediately went to work, grabbing me with one of his hands, pumping me softly as he wrapped his lips around the head, getting it nice and moist as he swirled his tongue around. My fingers were trembling, and the sensation crashing through my cockhead, down to my groin and down my thighs was so powerful that I had to bite my lip and focus on gripping the armrests just to keep from shouting out. This boy knew what he was doing, and he had just barely gotten started.

I felt the veins on Peter’s muscles expand, letting an intense surge of blood-flow crash through every part of his body. It was a euphoria like no other, and it only intensified as this mile high slut began bobbing his slick mouth up and down, up and down, picking up speed as he kept sucking that meat and swirling his tongue over all of Peter’s most sensitive spots. I cringed and scrunched my face it felt so fucking good, but I didn’t want to make too much noise. At this point though I think he was almost challenging me to give in and admit how good it felt. He finally had his wish as he all of a sudden jolted his head down, swallowing every inch of my meat as he scooped both hands up my shirt and found my sensitive nipples.

My eyes shot wide open as he began deepthroating me with ferocious speed, all while squeezing, twisting, and rubbing all over my massive pecs, and particularly, my tight and hard nipples. My back arched violently as a loud groan finally escaped my lips. I bit my lip though to shut myself up, scrunching my face up again and hyperventilating as this boy kept swallowing my entire length.

I couldn’t have hoped for a better last orgasm in Peter’s body, but I still wanted it to be at least partially on my own terms. Growling as I felt the testosterone levels in Peter’s body rising, I grabbed the boy’s head with both of my hand’s, getting no resistance from him as I began to pull him down onto my cock, harder and even faster than he was already going. Mmmmmmm it felt so satisfying as I used Peter’s strong arms to pull that mouth and tight throat down onto his juicy meat. Such a good throat fuck, but I couldn’t hold my hips back anymore, so it got even more intense. I know I might have been going rough on the boy, but he wasn’t complaining as I started bucking my hips up, thrusting into his mouth and thrusting powerfully down his throat. The boy kept squeezing my pecs and nipples, getting more intense as I added more and more power to my throat fuck. My toes were curling in my shoes as I looked down at this hungry mile high slut, and seeing the desperation in his eyes finally sent me over the edge. Groaning loudly, I slammed his mouth down onto one last powerful cock thrust after what had seemed like an eternity of building pressure in Peter’s massive balls. With that thrust, my pent up load was finally free, releasing stream after stream directly down the hungry throat that was so expertly milking my cock. I shivered as kept yanking his throat down onto each new ribbon of cum, milking out over a dozen shots before the stream finally slowed to mere droplets which we sucked straight out of me with that skilled mouth.

Attention Passengers, Please prepare for landing. We will be arriving in approximately five minutes.

“Damn, sorry boy. I guess I don’t have time to return the favor.”He just smiled adoringly at me though. “No, don’t be sorry. That was-That was amazing! I’ll be thinking about you and this later tonight. This will be on my mind for the next month at the very least!”He gave me one more passionate kiss before he straightened his tie and uniform, giving me a sexy wink as he made the landing preparations, leaving me in my golden orgasmic bliss. He was kind enough to point to my ankles though, reminding me my pants and boxers were still down, leaving my softening meat out for the world to see. I quickly pulled my pants back up as we began the descent.

I hopped in the cab at the airport, unable to contain my grin as I gave the driver the address of Bastian’s Beverly Hills mansion. The cab driver wasn’t particularly talkative, so I sat in eager silence as I mentally prepared for my transfer and mini vacation from Peter’s body.

The passing vistas and palm trees zoom by as I absentmindedly reach my hands underneath my shirt and begin rubbing and feeling Peter’s body. I know I’ll be feeling this body from the other side, but I’ll miss the feeling of ownership and possession. Something about feeling Peter Van der Veen’s abs and squeezing those massive pecs with his own strong hands was immensely satisfying. Taking over strong men and making them my hosts…my vessels…will always be my drug of choice.

“We’re here, Mister,” the taxi driver says, looking at me with an odd expression as I realize I’m still circling Peter’s hard nipples. I swoop my hands out from under Peter’s shirt, unable to help but go a little red in the face as I awkwardly thank and pay the guy. I pull out Peter’s wallet, so comfortable now seeing his ID and associating that image and identity as my own. That’s when you know you’ve found a keeper, when you look at your host’s ID and instinctively think, “Damn, I look hella fine.”

I tipped the guy well to mask the awkwardness and walked over to the front door, suitcases in tow. There was a note on the front door telling me to come on in and meet my new employers in the back. The note said to just keep on following the central corridor until I reached them. Opening the door, I was blown away by the extravagance of this massive and modern mansion.

“What a great place to vacation,” I said aloud to myself in shock as I plopped my bags on the marble floor, closed the door, and began the long walk down the central hallway. I passed by massive living and entertaining rooms, all decked out with expensive art, impeccable decoration, and state of the art technology. The kitchen and dining room was as large as most people’s whole apartments, and I think I walked passed a whole new set of entertainment and party/recreational rooms. It was simply unbelievable, but I got pulled back to reality as I heard light moaning emanating from the last room at the end of the hall.

The moaning was definitely deep, low, and masculine. Judging by the videos I had watched during my research, I knew it was Bastian who was cooing and making those sweet sounds of pleasure. I could hear him faintly egging on what I can only assume was his wife, Maria. That accent was still distinctly German, and thought some people thought it was a little harsh, I shivered from its foreign and exotic appeal. I had never taken over a foreigner before, so I wondered if I would have the joy of speaking with such a German flare. I kept walking cautiously towards the moans, concerned that I was going to interrupt a particularly private and intimate moment. Still, I advanced. That’s one of the great things about Peter’s body. I’m this massive tank of toned muscle, but he is so light on his feet. I barely make a sound as I walk right up to the cracked door and slowly push it open as I walk inside.

“Huh?” I asked aloud as I creaked the door open and saw Bastian, shirtless and laying down on a medical table as his wife performed a spa facial. She was dressed and made up to the nth degree with her pink mini dress, pumps, and full make up while she massaged her husband’s face, working the active ingredients deep into his skin that would help maintain his youth. He clearly found the experience very pleasurable as the sounds coming out of his mouth were almost orgasmic.

“That must be you, Peter,” he said in his sweet German accent and without even opening his eyes.

“We’re just finishing the last step,” Maria said with a smile as she spread the remaining moisture serum down his neck before clicking a button that brought the reclined medical table back up to a chair-like angle.

Bastian finally opened his eyes as he smiled at me, happy to see that he had been able to afford my services. My host was, after all, the most sought out bodyguard in Hollywood.

“Maria, can you give us some time? I need to show him the house and talk about the next three months. Here’s some cash–go buy something pretty,” he said as he casually handed her a thick strap of hundred dollar bills. She was almost giddy with joy as she collected the multi-thousand dollar wad of cash and left to go shop to her heart’s content at her favorite designer stores. “Now, that frees up some time for just us guys,” he said with a cheeky grin as he got up off the table and put his shirt back on.

This was going too perfectly. I tried to suppress my own giddy grin as he began to show me around the house, when like he said, it was just us guys.

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greenhatsinthesky · 4 years

Text

lockdown film no. 28 - Mr. Bean’s Holiday (2007) dir. Steve Bendelack

24/04/2020

because I am An Adult, this was the film that me and my parents decided to watch for my birthday this year. It was a thoroughly enjoyable evening given I hadn’t seen it in several years and we got a takeaway from the best pizza place around and my dad bought wildly overpriced vegan ben and Jerrys

- when mr bean wins the raffle its actually very heartwarming how happy everyone is for him

- THE TRAIN TRANSITION HOLY HELL

- im absolutely in love with all the the video camera footage they use

- “un café?” “oui” “du sucre?” “non” “you speak very good French” “gracias”

- last year for a film project we had to make a short film with only 20 words of dialogue and this is actually a great example of how to do it because he never really uses words its mainly just sounds

- the soundtrack in this is absolutely boss no lie

- i went on holiday with my friends last year to an island that was so small you could walk around the whole thing at least five times in a day, and also had basically no buildings. And so from there the concept of ‘mr beaning it’ was born, where you pick where you want to go and walk in a straight line in that direction

- the fact that this was the first film I saw Willem Dafoe in is hilarious to me because he’s such a serious actor and then there’s this. I saw this, Spiderman and then Mississippi burning and man that really threw me off

- ties and vending machines are a health risk

- richard curtis worked on this ??

- the plateau de fruits de mer scene absolutely sent my entire family it is just the peak of comedy. Me and my mum saw the film for the first time in a cinema when I was about eight and it just gets us every time

- THE OYSTER WHEN IT MOVES

- apparently the guy who plays the waiter in that scene is a very celebrated actor in France and he’s done loads of serious stuff so this is another kind of Willem dafoe situation it seems

- the boy playing Stepan was Viktor in the series years and years and when I say that absolutely blew my mind when I found out

- the scene where Stepan copies mr bean and they’re crossing their legs is so cute and a bit of nice light humour before the real shit kicks in

- I know it wouldn’t work if they could call the dad straight away but the two numbers at the end are clearly 97

- THE HOTEL WORKER WITH THE PHONE WHAT PAIN THEY WERE SO CLOSE

- ohhhhhh the market scene. whoever came up with the idea for that should get an Oscar

- mans got some strong legs holding a squat for the whole of rondo alla turca

- i think the opera scene in the market (i don’t know the name of the piece) is one of the funniest scenes in the whole film if not in a lot of films. Its absolute class and I love how mr bean, who doesn’t speak a full sentence for the majority of the film all of a sudden knows every word to an Italian opera. Also the scene that they construct and play out is actually very emotional and they both end up dead but its still funny ?

- stepan really just yeeted the camera at a total stranger now that is some faith in humanity right there

- I wanna grab onto a car while riding someone else’s bike in the middle of the French countryside and go zOOM past the tour de France

- the chickens cluck in tune with the song and I personally am a huge fan of that

- I think rowan atkinsons face is made of rubber or something

- he goes into that little hut and the vehicles gradually get more and more absurd like tHIS IS HOW YOU DO COMEDY

- I don’t think they went into how fucking weird it would be to fall asleep and wake up under a cart in a French village that turns out to be under siege by nazis

- also, I know Carson Clay is meant to be a parody of a Hollywood director, but I just want to know what happens at the end of the advert. Does sabine end the war and appease the nazis with yoghurt?

- Une minuscule explosion?

- Sabine was super chill about them using her phone to call basically everyone in France

- the car scene with the matches has absolutely gone down in history. Literally every time were driving at night someone will mention that scene

- the French translator at Cannes was hilarious like clay said his bit, looked over at the guy, the guy sort of cringes (?) and goes “he says it is a very good film”

- all the scenes we see from playback time get me every time and I’m pretty sure its one of my dads favourite scenes

- nothingnothing nothing nothing n o t h i n g

- OHHHH when the fam gets back together ! So wholesome!

- la mer. what a tune, and all the things lining up so he can just walk straight down to the sea I lOVE

- oh man what a good film

- its just a great comfort film and its so funny but its really warm as well and its not cheesy but its really funny and I love it

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dawninlatin · 4 years

Text

Queen of Peace, chapter 9

A Manorian High School AU

Words: 2780

AO3 Link

Masterlist

Summary: Manon Blackbeak is flawless, untouchable. From the outside at least. Her grandmother pushes her to achieve greatness, and she doesn’t let anyone get too close in fear of being hurt. How can anyone love her when not even her parents could?

Dorian Havilliard has always felt safe and confident around his friends. He might not have the greatest of families, but with Aelin and Chaol by his side, nothing can go wrong. That is until he tries keeping his greatest secret from them.

What will happen when Dorian and Manon gets to know one another? Can two lost souls find their way back together?

Sometimes I wish for falling

Wish for the release

Wish for falling through the air

To give me some relief

-Florence + The Machine, Falling

«So what did you do yesterday? Since you’re doing your homework last minute.» Dorian looked up from his math homework to find Manon taking him in with an amused expression.

They were sitting in the busy coffee shop a few blocks from school, spending their shared free period eating lunch together. Or, Manon was eating lunch while Dorian tried his very best to finish the homework he’d forgotten to do last night.

A few weeks had passed since the two of them had agreed to be friends, and almost immediately they’d fallen into a rhythm. They got coffee after school, they hung out during free periods, they met up at the library to do homework together. Manon still claimed she only did this so Dorian would stop bugging her, but she’d been the one suggesting they go out for lunch today.

«Erhm-,» Dorian begun, debating whether the truth would make her laugh or make him lose his last shred of dignity or both, even. Fuck it, he decided and confidently stated, «I was up watching Riverdale.» If you’re losing your dignity, better do it with swagger.

It took Manon a while to actually register what he’d said, but when she did, she set down her coffee and let out a snort. A snort that quickly turned into her lilting cackle. One thing Dorian had learned over these past few weeks was that nothing made her laugh harder than his suffering, and to be honest, Dorian didn’t mind. Not at all. She was adorable when she laughed.

«You didn’t mean that? Right?» Manon asked, suddenly all serious. «Please tell me you’re joking.» Dorian shot her a confused look.

«That show is literal trash,» she kept going once she realized Dorian had in fact not been kidding. «Sorry I changed my mind we’re not friends anymore, sorry, bye.» Manon even went as far as to start gathering up her things, but the barely-there smile playing on her lips told Dorian she was very much enjoying this.

«You just have to give it a try, it’s not that bad,» Dorian said, Manon sitting back down across from him. As he noticed a faint blush spreading on her cheeks, something in his head clicked into place. «You’ve watched it, haven’t you?»

Rolling her eyes, Manon answered, «Yes, but it was years ago. I watched a few episodes with Asterin.» Upon seeing Dorian’s smug expression, she quickly added, «Unwillingly.»

If it had been years ago…This time, Dorian was the one to break out into uncontrollable laughter. Oh my god, he thought, clutching his stomach. «You thought the first season was bad??» he managed to choke out. Manon only looked at him with a dumbfounded expression, having no idea what was so funny.

«I would give anything to see you watch season three and four. That’s when it really gets ridiculous,» Dorian explained, his laughter finally dying down. Manon chuckled and shook her head, returning to her half-full cup of coffee.

She stared out the window, and Dorian allowed himself to take her in, if only for a moment. There had been more and more of these moments over the past few weeks. Moments where she was looking a different way, moments where Dorian couldn’t stop his eyes from landing on her, moments where he found it impossible to look away. Dorian hadn’t let himself think about what it meant. Manon had been very clear from the beginning that they were only friends, and they would never be more than that.

Manon was like the sun, Dorian had decided. You knew you shouldn’t stare at it, but that was the exact reason why you did, why it was so hard to look away.

«Okay, but apart from Riverdale, have you watched anything good? I don’t watch much TV, but…» She never finished the sentence, seemingly lost in her own mind. Manon did that sometimes, trailing off to gods knew where. Dorian was certain it was a beautiful place.

Taking some time to think, Dorian tried to come up with a good show, sorting through the catalogue in his mind for something it was likely she had watched. Suddenly he thought of how she had loved reading a fantasy series, how eager she got whenever they discussed history or mythology. Hesitantly, he suggested, «Game of Thrones?» Manon’s eyes lit up.

«Yes!» She put down her empty cup. «Oh that was so good-»

«-apart from the final season,» Dorian finished.

A sigh. «Jon Snow deserved better.»

«I know. His storyline was a tragedy.»

Manon bit her lip, sinking further into her chair. «You know, I only started watching it because I thought he was hot.» She blushed, and Dorian couldn’t help but chuckle. «I stayed for the plot though. I swear!»

Same, Dorian nearly blurted out, before a voice in his head reminded him, Manon doesn’t know you’re bi. He wasn’t going to think about this now, so he shook his head and forced his signature smirk to appear, ignoring the sinking feeling in his gut.

«I still can’t get over the fact that you drink chocolate Frappuccinos with extra cream.» Smooth, Dorian, it definitely does not seem like you’re avoiding the subject of your shared fictional crush.

«Why?» she chuckled. «You expect me to order my coffee extra bitter so it matches my soul? While we’re at it, let me just gather up my things and head home to my cottage in the woods where I fly around on broomsticks and brew weird shit in cauldrons. My black cat must be tired of waiting.»

They were both laughing now, Manon’s dark, wicked sense of humor still taking him by surprise. «For real though, what do you do when you’re not at school or at dance practice?»

«Uhm,» Manon looked down at her shoes, suddenly uncomfortable. They hardly talked about serious stuff, private stuff. Dorian was ready to change the subject once more, but then she spoke: «I listen to music a lot, I guess.» A shrug.

«Anything good?»

«Doubt it, you seem like the type to listen to mainstream shit.»

«Please. And I bet your music isn’t as special as you think.»

«I bet you don’t know half of the stuff I listen to.»

«Why don’t you give me some examples?»

«Why don’t I send you a playlist when I get home?»

«Can’t wait,» Dorian smiled.

Gods, how difficult could it be to make a playlist?

Manon had been sitting with her laptop for an hour now, scrolling through her endless Spotify library to find the perfect songs. Nothing too mainstream, nothing too personal, nothing too impersonal. This was one hell of a challenge, she decided.

After narrowing it down to twenty songs she loved, after finding the perfect balance between upbeat and slow, between sad and happy, after meticulously arranging the order, making it not only a playlist, but a musical experience, Manon decided this would have to do.

Why do you care so much? She didn’t dare answer the question, too afraid of what the answer might mean. This was just her sending a friend a casual playlist.

Except it wasn’t. Nothing about her music was casual. It meant everything to her. Manon listened to music when she was happy, when she was sad, angry, whenever she felt lost and needed to be pointed back in the right direction. She listened to music when she was dancing, dreaming, disappearing. If one listened closely, her music revealed all her secrets, all her feelings, and for Manon, who was used to keeping it hidden away, locked in a box deep inside herself, sharing that with someone was terrifying.

But what terrified her the most right now, was that she actually wanted to share her music with Dorian. Being with him always left her feeling light and happy, she had started craving that feeling like a drug. And today…today when he had made her laugh so hard she’d had to set down her half-empty cup so as to not drop it, for a moment, Manon had imagined what it would be like to just lean in and kiss him. It would have been so easy, would have felt so good.

She hadn’t been able to stop thinking about that moment, about what it meant. Was she falling for him? Was she actually that stupid?

The only solution, really, was to stop hanging out with him, to ignore her feelings until they went away. So why haven’t you done it yet? Why do you keep going back?

Besides, even if she wanted to be more than friends, there was no way he felt the same way. Sure, he kept joking about how their meet-ups were dates, but that’s all it was, a joke. Being in a relationship with Dorian also meant letting him see who she was up-close, and as soon as he saw the broken, messed up truth, he surely would want nothing to do with her. Better to spare herself the heartbreak.

Ugh, feelings.

Manon decided it was too late to brood over such complex questions. Instead, she typed a quick message to Dorian, linked the playlist and hit send before she could change her mind.

Manon: Here’s the playlist. It’s best enjoyed if you listen to it in the right order. 22:03

And just like that it was done. Manon waited a few minutes for a reply and when none came, she quietly said to herself, «Girl, get your shit together.»

She stood up, stretched, and stepped out of her room to turn of all the lights, ready to just go to sleep. Asterin still hadn’t come home, but it was late, so she probably wouldn’t show up at all. What a surprise, Manon thought to herself.

When she reached the living room, she spied Abraxos staring at her from one of the couches. Manon turned of the lights and the creature immediately leapt to where she was standing in the hallway. «What kind of cat is afraid of the dark?» Manon asked her companion, sighing at his antics. Abraxos only stared up at her as if she was the stupid one.

It was true that the cat was afraid of the dark. Ever since he was a kitten, Abraxos simply refused to be alone in a room if the lights were off. Manon found it equally confusing and adorable.

She walked back to her bedroom, Abraxos trailing her like a shadow the entire time. Laying back down on the bed, Manon picked up her phone to see if Dorian had texted back yet. She couldn’t help but feel a little disappointed when there was no new messages.

«Calm down, it’s not as if he’s looking at his phone at all hours, just waiting for you to text him, you creep,» she said to herself.

Instead of waiting, she opened Spotify, plugged in her earphones, and pressed play on the list she’d just sent Dorian, contempt to shut out the world for a little while.

That afternoon, when he’d gotten home from school, Dorian had waited, and waited, and waited, for a text from Manon, including a certain playlist she had promised him. He’d stared at his phone for hours, like some creep, hoping her name would pop up.

Around 10pm he’d given up and opted for spending some electronics-free quality time with his family. His mom’s suggestion, not his. Dorian had lasted about 20 minutes, before he once again fled to his room.

Leaving his phone alone had worked it’s magic though, because when he reunited with it, there was a text from Manon waiting to be opened. He was so eager he typed the wrong passcode. Twice.

Manon: Here’s the playlist. It’s best enjoyed if you listen to it in the right order. 22:03

The text was written in typical Manon-style. No spelling errors, perfect language, no emojis, only periods. What kind of teen only used periods when they texted? Manon never seized to surprise him.

Dorian opened the link, finding a playlist full of songs and artists he’d never heard of before. Told you. He could almost hear Manon’s voice say it, a smug smile playing on her lips.

Plugging his earphones in, Dorian leaned back and pressed play. In the right order, obviously.

About an hour later, as the final song died out into nothing, Dorian let out a long exhale, giving himself a moment to just be.

He didn’t know what he was thinking, what he was feeling. It was all so personal, so full of emotion and passion. The complete opposite of what he would have expected from Manon.

Dorian knew this was important. He had been shown a vital part of her, a part he suspected she hadn’t shown anyone before.

Who are you?

It was a question he had asked himself over and over again over the past few weeks. Manon was a mystery, a puzzle, and all that music, all that insight, felt like the most important piece of them all.

Who are you?

Yet he wasn’t sure if this had given him answers, or more questions.

Manon listened through the entire playlist without being able to fall a sleep. She had too much on her mind, too many thoughts churning in her head.

Her phone buzzed from the nightstand, and Manon sat up abruptly, knocking over a stack of books as she fumbled around for her phone. They landed on the floor with a bang, waking Abraxos from his carefree slumber in the process. The cat jumped and glared at Manon, then turned his back towards her, settling down once more. Manon did the mature thing and stuck out her tongue at him.

She’d nearly forgotten about the phone in her hand, but glancing down at the screen, she saw Dorian’s name, her heartbeat quickening in response.

Dorian: Sorry for not replying til now but I heard through the entire thing and fine you were right I hadn’t heard any of it before and yes you do have fantastic taste in music pls send me more!!!!! 23:41

Manon chuckled at his enthusiasm, pleased at having been right. She was about to type a response when she heard the front door open, then the sound of someone trying to stay quiet as they made their way through the house. Asterin.

She expected her cousin to go straight to her own room, but instead, Asterin stopped in front of Manon’s door, slowly pushing it open. She must’ve thought Manon was asleep, because she jumped slightly when she found Manon sitting upright, taking her in with curiosity and annoyance.

«I’m s-sorry, I thought you were sleeping,» Asterin whispered, her voice cracking. The sound of shuffling feet. A sniffle. Was Asterin crying?

Asterin walked over to Manon’s bed, and Manon made room for her, sliding under the covers. Asterin soon joined her, and neither said a word, Asterin’s soft crying filling the room.

«Did something happen?» Manon asked at last, unable to handle her cousin’s crying for much longer.

«You can’t tell her,» Asterin sobbed, burying her head in the mountain of pillows.

«Can’t tell her what?» Manon knew Asterin meant their grandmother, the heavy feeling in her stomach told her so. She wasn’t sure if she was ready to hear the answer. It couldn’t be anything good. Had she and Hunter broken up? Had someone hurt her?

Asterin furiously shook her head. «You have to promise, Manon. She c-can’t find out!»

«I promise,» Manon sighed, clearly uncomfortable. She’d never been good at dealing with crying people.

Still, Manon let Asterin creep closer, let her bury her face in the space between Manon’s neck and shoulder. Putting her arms around her shaking, crying cousin, Manon asked once more, «What’s wrong, Asterin?»

Asterin went completely still, not saying anything. Manon waited, waited to the point where she was sure her cousin had fallen asleep.

As Manon closed her own eyes, Asterin whispered something that made Manon go rigid, the words so quiet you could barely make them out.

«I’m pregnant.»

«Shit,» was all Manon could answer. She tried her hardest not to think about what their grandmother would do if she found out, panic spreading throughout her body.

Asterin started sobbing once more, so Manon began stroking her back, telling her to breathe, telling her to calm down, pushing aside her own worry and fear, for now. «It’s going to be okay,» she whispered to Asterin, not believing her own words one bit.

A/N: Wow I haven't updated this in forever. Sorry....

But as an apology I do come bearing gifts. Not only is this chapter the longest yet, I also made a fic playlist if you wanna vibe<3 In the wise words of Manon Blackbeak, it is best enjoyed in the right order;)

https://open.spotify.com/playlist/3LFklksVGgX4X8LxoYzbbK?si=oC-3zOZMTC-B5Nd4C3QAZg

Also while I'm at it, a couple disclaimers:

- I have earlier made a lot of references to Harry Potter, but I will no longer do so, as I am not comfortable with referencing the work of an author who do not respect trans people. I hope you all understand this.

- Yes I mock Riverdale in this chapter and if you feel offended know that I will never understand how someone can actually enjoy that show but I DO respect you:)

As always, thank you sooooo much to everyone who takes the time to read, give kudos, like, reblog, write comments etc. For real I love you<3<3

Peace&Love<3 -Dawninlatin

#dawninlatin QoP #tog #throne of glass #sarah j maas #manorian #manon x dorian #dorian x manon #manon blackbeak #dorian havilliard #manorian fanfiction #throne of glass fanfiction

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gt-adventures · 4 years

Text

Hey Little SongBird

(SFW GT fantasy adventure short story.)

A Tale of the Mystic Woods

Staring: Yonah HaEsh the half-giant wizard. and guest-starring Ophir, the mostly human bard.

Summary: Ophir the bard needs a story to get back in the good graces of the Bards Guild and ventures into the Mystic Woods to find one. And what a story he ends up in! In the clutches of the Great and Terrible Yonah HaEsh. Can Ophir, through story, song, and dance, touch the evil “man-eating” giant’s wicked heart and avoid a terrible fate? (yes of course he can!)

Warnings: Yonah’s job is to be a villainous fairy tale giant (and wizard). That means the whole “fee fi fo fum” and threatening to eat people routine, and he’s really convincing. At no point in this story does he ever intend to follow through on the threat. ALSO Ophir tells a fairytale that ends slightly gruesomely (I actually changed it to be less so… still)

---

I hate the stereotype of bards being horny tricksters who use their voices to seduce people into infidelity. Any such stories are complete poppycock and base slander. Bards are more than pretty faces and lovely voices. We are first and foremost story tellers, entertainers! Actors and chroniclers! Often risking life and limb to get you the stories you love so much. Those fancy sword moves and fight dances you see on stage aren’t just for show.

But still. Going into the Mystic Woods in search of my next story was not a great idea. Solo’ing an adventure into such a dangerous realm was asking for death, with no one around who could tell of it. And yet. I had run out of new material and was desperate. Why didn’t I just purchase rights from another bard through the guild? You might ask. Clever, very clever, but that’s what low rankers do. The apprentices, the journeyors. Not Masters such as I. At least. Not ones who are blacklisted from the guild for not properly crediting a story. How was I to know it wasn’t public domain! It seemed pretty generic to me.

Another problem with being blacklisted? No one wants to adventure with you. Not anyone high ranking enough to help me anyways.

Regardless, to earn back my place in the guild I needed a new story, an impressive story. So I gathered my supplies and took the first teleport to the City of Luster, closest city in the Kingdom of Orr to the Mystic Woods. Sure, other cities exist at its borders, but Luster is the only one with a direct path into the Woods. A path that is safe, to a point.

It’s also a great place to get a few last minute supplies. For example, a small ukulele. My previous instrument, my precious goldenrod Oud, was repossessed by the guild. I needed something cheap and lightweight. And also I was banned from purchasing from most craftsfolk because, and I’m sure you’re tired of hearing this, im Blacklisted.

Luster is so large that I was able to find the ukulele in a pawn shop. I wasn’t after a ukulele, that’s just what was there.

Right! I was ready to go.

Whistling the first ever song I wrote, and tuning my new old ukulele, I set off down the road.

And Into the Woods.

---

Maybe I should lower my standards? Surely the guild won't be too hard on me?

Or perhaps it would just take more than a day and night in the woods to find a story.

The first day I found some gnomes preparing for a small feast of the half-moon glory. I was confident that something would happen at the party. Something had to go wrong, and maybe a hero, maybe I, would save the day! Or night, as it would be night. No such luck, it was a very nice celebration, absolutely no issues. Wasted a day!!

Not that i'm on a time limit.

The gnomes were so nice, and they made the most delightful floral scented cakes. They enjoyed my songs and tales about heroic gnomes and I left their camp with a flower crown and a sack of cakes.

I felt like today I would find a story!

Nope.

In this forest of wonder and magic and monsters and secrets, I ran into nothing. I even played music to attract trouble but Nooooooooo, guess even the beasts of the woods knew I was blacklisted!

It was late afternoon when I found some interesting deer tracks and decided to follow.

Bards aren’t known for our stealth but I’m going to tell you a secret. What’s the guild gonna do! Blacklist me?

Anyways the secret is: certain Bards learn to play notes and pitches that cancel out our footsteps and create silence.

I followed the prints to find a small herd of very interesting deer!

They had really interesting patterns, each one slightly different but only if you looked closely. That meant I needed a closer look.

So focused on the deer I didn’t watch my feet and I tripped. The deer ran off.

“HEY!” a shrill voice called from somewhere in the trees, “What did you do that for?”

No idea who was yelling at me but I was taking no chances, and like the deer I bolted. But not fast enough, not nimble enough.

An arrow shot by my leg and stuck in the ground. I stopped. And stood perfectly still.

“idiot.” the voice was now right behind me!

I turned. And looked down. It was an elf! With plum purple skin and dark green hair.

And they were laughing.

Then another elf fell from the trees to land silently next to the first. This one had dark green skin and straw yellow hair. Their long ears were standing straight up reaching higher than my eyes.

They were laughing too.

“What’s so funny?”

“You responded to ‘idiot’!” Said the purple one.

Ugh. Elves!!

Then they got suddenly more serious.

“Can’t believe it! We’ve been hunting those deer for days and you happen to trip when we got them in our sights!”

“I’m, sorry?”

The second elf elbowed the first, “he couldn’t have known we were there, Damian! Not his fault!” She spoke in elvish but I’m fluent.

The first elf, Damian, looked up and half groaned half sighed, “and I suppose, Bridget, that I should apologize to the human for almost shooting him?”

I don’t know why I spoke up but I did.

“It was an impressive warning shot!”

Damian’s ears stood up again then folded back and a little red flush appeared on the purple cheeks. As did on Bridget’s but for a different reason.

“Yes. Warning shot,” they said.

This time I managed to keep my mouth shut. Not a smart idea to quip about an elve’s bunting prowess. I still wasn’t happy to learn they were trying to shoot me!

“You’re an adventurer?” Asked Bridget.

“A bard!” I said.

“Need a place to stay tonight?”

The shadows were lengthening, I hadn’t noticed. And then my stomach growled.

“I sure do. But are you sure? I mean I did scare the deer-“

Damian shouldered their bow and nodded, “It wouldn’t be very elven to leave a stranger in the woods.”

Even not hunting they moved so silently I couldn’t take my eyes off them as I followed them to their village. We stopped by the temple, as it is the respectful thing to do when entering the village. It was set up for fall, done up in browns and oranges and paper chains. On the altar was a single brown leaf. The first one seen by a member of the village.

I’m not elvish but I still prayed to Autumn for my hometown to have a bountiful harvest.

I sat on the floor in the common dining hall as my new… friends, sat on stools made of tree stumps. They may not have caught any deer but there was some sort of roasted meat concoction wrapped in sugary leaves, crystallized to give it crunch, making a sweet and savory combination I’d never experienced before. The same sugar crispy leaves were used to scoop a sort of nut and vegetable curry. Delightful! I could write a song just about the food.

I of course told them why I was in the woods, since they were curious.

And they told everyone how I tripped and fell, exaggerating it greatly. All the elves laughed but knowing elves I was better off. They enjoyed slapstick comedy. The fact that I was able to laugh at myself seemed to gain me favor.

One elf, with lighter green skin and dark brown hair laughed like the rest and yet, their eyes were deep in thought. They were a strange one, I think. Even by elf standards they had a strange name.

Jacuzzi? Who names themselves jacuzzi?

Then they spoke.

“So, you need a story?” They asked. I nodded.

“I think I can help you,” they said, “at the very least point you in the right direction.”

At their words a lot of the company got quiet.

“If you’re that desperate, there’s,” they paused, as if they were still considering whether or not to tell me, “A wizard. If you encounter him, you’re sure to get a proper story.”

I couldn’t think why this made the elf act so strange, plenty of mages made it their job to participate in tales. Though. With wizards they were usually evil, if not a member of an adventuring party. Nonetheless! A story about a wizard sounded fantastic.

“Where does-“ I stopped myself from finishing that stupid sentence. Nowhere in the Mystic Woods stayed put so asking for directions was complete folly.

“What’s the best way to, uh, find him?”

Jacuzzi shrugged “The birds have the most up to date information. But you’ll know it’s his place when you find the tower in the garden.”

Lots of wizards had towers, few had gardens. That was more of a witch thing.

“He’ll be there? Tonight”

“Probably, he can't- well he’ll be there. If not tonight then by the morning. Don’t mess with his things.”

“Why-”

“He considers it extremely rude- You don't want to be rude”

Sound advice.

“Hold on tonight?” Damian re-entered the conversation. “Are you mad? Traveling the forest at night is dangerous! Especially alone.”

“So? I’m trying to get into trouble. Doesn’t make a difference if I find it at the tower or on my way.”

My confidence wasn’t entirely fake. I had a good meal, I wasn’t tired. I could knock this out by morning!

“Thank you, for everything.”

I swear I heard giggling as I departed. If these elves were pulling one over on me well! I don’t know what I would do but I’ll think of something. I had a wizard to find.

It wasn’t long before I realized why I should have waited for morning.

No! Birds!

From Who could I ask directions? The sun was about to set. It was only early autumn, the days were still a decent length, but it would be dark real soon. No birds, no people.

Wait. I spoke too soon. There were footsteps. It was a slim chance but maybe they could help me.

“Young man, what are you doing? Don’t you know it’s dangerous to be out at night alone?”

The voice had a deep and soft quality that wasn’t human. But they were speaking Orriandish. Really folks, dont meet strangers in the forest that you can’t see. They’re usually evil witches or sorcerers or cyclops ogres. Yeah, one-eyed ogres are skilled talkers, luring people to them. It was only after I answered I realized this could be an ogre.

“Aren’t you out alone too?”

“Why yes-” the voice was closer and then I saw them.

Thankfully it wasn’t and ogre. But it was a witch, and a dwarf one. Uncommon. Probably not evil. It did explain why they were confidently out at night. Dwarves had pretty amazing night vision. They had the traditional black robe and hat, and a cat sat down beside them. It was a really large cat, which was amusing next to the short witch. Their long braided beard was decorated with trinkets, which was a quaint look I must admit.

“But I live here.”

I stood up straight, which I guess was a bit rude.

“How do you know I don’t?” I stammered, “I could!”

The dwarf stroked their beard, “I guess it’s possible, do you?”

I sighed and slouched, “No…”

“But I am looking for trouble.” I explained my story and the dwarf listened, smiling kindly.

“So the elves told me I would be guaranteed a story if I found this wizard who has a tower and a garden-”

The witch’s eyebrows raised.

“- you know this wizard?”

The cat mrowed loudly, his tail swishing on the forest floor a bit faster.

“I do indeed,” there was an extreme fondness in their voice.

“And you know where he is?”

The witch laughed, “I’d say this was coincidence, but in these parts there are too many of those to be truly coincidental. I do in fact know the currently location, and it’s close by.”

“Really!” I almost danced with excitement.

Unlike the elves the dwarf had no hesitations. They pointed me in the right direction, and informed me of a few roadblocks and landmarks.

“Thanks so much!” I waved back at them and didn’t look where I was going and almost tripped.

Almost.

“And light your lantern!”

Oh right, duh!

Finding the tower was easy with the witch’s directions. They’d even told me the thorns were fake and the vines safe to climb up. That should have raised red flags, or some color, but I was so focused on achieving my goal.

Now, we bards aren’t really known for our… physical abilities beyond dance. We can fight sure, but a fifty-foot climb is gonna leave most bards gasping for breath. I'm proud to say I was merely on the cusp of wheezing, though I was having difficulty standing.

I needed to rest. So I lay on the windowsill.

Which I failed to notice stretched so that I could more than easily lie down. The cool night air and stone felt so nice. I looked into the tower.

And my heart stopped.

I’d gotten a brief glimpse before nearly passing out, but it was different now.

Exactly the same.

But.

Bigger.

You might know, my readers, that wizards are all human. All of them. Non-humans aren’t allowed to attend the academy. I’m sure those like I, being a quarter fairy, might be let in, but... This- this giant sized workshop didn’t make any sense. A giant could not be a wizard no way. Why would the elves say this was a wizard’s tower? Did they not understand the difference between wizard, witch, and sorcerer?

But the dwarf witch, they had to know! They had not corrected me. Plus, the workshop did have a very wizard feel to it.

What was going on here?

I needed a moment to process so I rolled over to look outside. Looking inside made my head hurt.

But a Giant Wizard. If that were real, what a story! If it were fake, then well, a giant mage is still exciting. I looked once more into the room. Three desks, one for material prepping and alchemy, one that looked like the main workbench, and one… like a spare workbench? It was not very organized compared to the other. And shelves full of things I could not identify.

And on the floor, an open trap door with stairs leading down. Down to where the wizard must be.

I was thankful I had noticed the shift in scale, or I surely would have fallen 15 feet onto the floor. Instead I got out my grappling hook and rope and rappelled down. With a flick, the hook dislodged. This place was large, I would need it again.

I could have spent hours in this room, just taking in the immense magical collection, but that wasn’t why I was there. And I heard noises from down the stairs. Water? Clinking metal? I took each stair one at a time, slowly making my way deeper into the tower.

Either the kitchen just happened to be one floor down or this stairwell was enchanted to take you to the floor you were thinking about. For just as I reached the landing I saw the massive doorframe that led into what was clearly a kitchen and small dining room. Small for the giant, who was at the sink washing pots, pans, and other things.

He certainly looked like a wizard! A tall wide brimmed hat with a curling point, and robes that matched the garish colors and patterns. He had a neatly trimmed goatee and mutton chops, and long curly black hair tied behind his back. On his handsomely large nose rested thick square spectacles. Not only was he tall, he was just plain large.

I know I talked about the false stereotypes of bards, but we weren't the only profession with them. People tended to think of Wizards as more delicate, as they spent all their time studying, never going out, forgetting meals. But this, man, for he looked more human than giant except for being over 20ft tall, well the only word for it was burly.

I’d never imagined a wizard who, if you removed his wizard robes, put him in a flannel shirt and handed him an axe would be a picture perfect lumberjack. Now such a wizard was right before my very eyes.

Suddenly I was not so confident. I should have lost my nerve back at the window, when I saw the scale of the workshop. But it just didn’t hit me until I saw the giant. I’ve seen giants before, they are actually larger than this person, that made him seem more dangerous.

Oh.

Oh no.

This wasn’t just any wizard, or any giant.

This one was evil.

Maybe I could just leave! Yeah. I would just get the fuck out of here. I was not prepared to handle an evil giant wizard.

I made my decision a bit too late. The giant stopped cleaning a plate to look up and sniff the air.

Shit.

It was futile to run, but it was my only option. I didn’t even make it up two stairs before the giant roared with delight.

“FEE FI FO FUM!”

No no no! Not that!

“I SMELL THE BLOOD OF THE HUMAN KIND!”

Well technically I was quarter fairy but-

“BE THEY ALIVE OR BE THEY DEAD, I’LL GRIND THEIR BONES TO MAKE MY BREAD.”

Yeah… I should not have come here. Evil giants tend to eat people. I’d had a small hope that this smaller giant, who was very likely a proper wizard, wouldn’t. Also the line about grinding my bones to make bread? I’m no alchemist but I dont think powdered bones make for a good flour, and wouldn’t even be enough to make bread for a giant if it were! As far as I knew giants didn’t bother with such things and just gobbled people up.

Which didn’t bode well for me as this giant made it stairwell in a few seconds and scooped me up in one hand, holding me up to his face.

“How convenient, a tasty little thief” he smiled, revealing very giant-like fangs. His breath was horrible. “I was just thinking I needed some dessert.”

“Please! Mister Wizard, I did not steal anything, I am no thief! I’m a bard!”

The giant raised his eyebrows, but did not set me down, instead he turned and walked back into the kitchen.

“A bard?” he asked, “what’s your name?”

“Ophir Shel Peh!” I said.

“Not Jack then?” The giant tapped his chin, and his eyes found my ukulele. “Hm. Yes I would say you probably are a bard! I don’t get many of those.”

He sat at the personal dining table. And set me in front of him, putting his elbows on the table, and his chin over intertwined fingers. It was silent except for his breathing, and my heart in my ears. Every breath he took blew around me, and it was just a little warmer than I expected. He didn’t say anything for a long time and I started shaking, adding my rattling bones to the noise.

“Why are you here?” he asked before I fainted (I had… somehow forgot about breathing).

“Adventuring!” I couldn’t say ‘for a story’! THAT’S CHEATING. But perhaps... Ah I can’t lie to you reader. I wish I could say I was perspicacious enough to consider this giant was a professional fairytale villain. But I had no idea. I was damn lucky he was though. And he’s really good. I understand why His Mystical Majesty hired him.

Let’s get back to me being a complete dumbass shall we?

The giant’s face hardened and I worried I’d fucked up.

“Adventuring?” he asked rhetorically, but I nodded, then he looked a little morose.

“Shame, I was thinking of letting you go-”

He was!?

“-But I guess I have to eat you after all.”

He didn't sound at all troubled by it. I mean, he had threatened to do so. I backed up and he smiled, knowing he could snatch me up no matter what. I think he could tell I was going to ask why, even just to stall.

“It’s nothing personal, I don’t like intruders on my good days. But I can’t have you out there talking about me, spreading the word of a merciful giant. You’ll only get more people killed. ”

That was a lot to process but I got the gist.

“I won't talk!”

He stood up and slammed his palms on the table so hard I finally fell down.

“You’re a bard, it’s your job!”

Unfortunately he was right.

Then he looked a bit surprised by something, narrowing his eyes at me.

“I suppose,” he said, “your job also involves performing?”

I nodded.

“I don’t get to go out much,” he said, though I wasn’t sure that the entire truth “If you give me a good show, I might consider it payment for what would have been an extra special treat. I can smell the fairy blood on you.”

I tried not to make a face. My fairy blood made me smell better? Great. And there was always a chance he was lying, just to get a show and his dessert. Evil giants might be fairly honorable, but evil wizards were notoriously dishonest. So I had no idea with this evil giant wizard.

“Wh-what do you want me to do?” I asked.

He sat back down, perfectly copying his original pose.

“Tell me a story,” he said. “And perhaps I will not eat you.”

Great. Legally there weren’t many stories I could tell. You might be asking, ‘Ophir! You’re about to die, what do you care?’ Well if I live and I'm found out, I’ll be expelled from the guild for life. I’m already in hot water.

That… and the only stories I could think of were ones with evil wizards or giants, who ended up dead. Curse my stupid brain. But I couldn’t refuse, he would eat me! Guess I had no other choice.

[(adapted from a real tale)

The story of Maestro Lattantio and His Apprentice Dionigi.

It was an old tale, from the long dead kingdom of Italy, so anyone could tell it. A wild tale of a wizard and his apprentice battling it out in ways only two mages would. Wanting to be free of his abusive master, Diogini kept turning into things, animals, creatures, to escape.

But Lattantio would transform into the exact creature or monster or animated object needed to re-capture Diogini. Eventually Diogini turned into a fish and swam down a river. Lattantio declared that he was through with these games and would kill him. Lattantio turned into a kingfisher hawk, intending to snatch him out of the water, but Diogini jumped into a basket carried by a handmaiden for the princess. The handmaiden had been doing laundry, so being a fish wouldn’t do. He turned himself into a beautiful ruby ring. The princess found it in her pocket and he became her new favorite piece of jewelry.

Then one day, the King became ill, and Lattantio was called in to cure him. He did of course, and in payment, asked for the princess’s ruby ring, for he could tell it was Diogini. But he could come back tomorrow for the payment

That night, when the princess took off the ring, Diogini transformed back into a man. He apologized for his ruse, and explained that the wizard Lattantio was his enemy, and would do anything to get him back into his clutches. The princess, who at first was horrified, saw that Diogini meant her no harm, and he was as handsome a man as he was beautiful a ring. She asked how she could help.

The next day, when Lattantio returned, the princess stepped forward and held out the ring. Then dropped it to the floor. It turned into a mouse, so of course, Lattantio turned into a cat. The princess whistled to one of the palace dogs, which leapt at the cat, breaking its neck.

Diogini quickly returned to human form and separated the dog from the cat’s corpse, tossing it into the fire. The only way to be sure the evil was truly destroyed.

Impressed by Diogini’s skill and at the behest of the princess, the King was happy to make Diogini the court wizard, and his son.

]

I concluded the story, and looked at the giant, distressed to find he looked unimpressed.

“That was,” he waved his hand in a dismissal manner, “diverting, but I could just have easily read that story.”

WHAT! I’d done voices! I was dramatic and expressive! How dare he say reading it from a book could be the same! But I couldn’t be angry because I was scared.

“Though I suppose it was decent,” he continued, “just not enough to keep you alive.”

Crap.

“Dance for me,” he said, “and perhaps I will not eat you.”

It took me a few seconds to notice he wasn’t eating me, but instead was giving me another chance. But… Dance!? On this table? With my leather boots on? And my thick pants? And no music!? This was not good.

“S-sure” I said, I was still shaking badly.

Since there was no music I thought perhaps, something that conveyed real meaning through motion. I could hear the song in my head at least, so I wouldn’t falter or look like I was making shit up.

I leapt and gestured, and waggled my body in the most embarrassing ways.

“What is this crap?” said the giant after I had danced for only a minute.

“Interpretive dance, mister giant,” I said, freezing in a most uncomfortable pose.

“You’d better pick something else,” he said. “And give it some more personality”

All I knew was he had given me a second chance. Ok. So I didn’t have music, but maybe something rhythmic would be better. I didn’t have the right shoes but my footsteps were still very audible.

So I went into a new dance. Hopping and stomping and tapping my feet. Then I started singing. I had been so stupid that I forgot I could do both at the same time. I basically re-invented a few ritual dances from my hometown, used to bless the beginning of each month. If I lived through this I would go home and teach everyone.

The giant Watched me carefully from behind those huge glasses. Judge, jury and executioner.

Finally I was sore and out of breath, jumped up to land with a mighty THUNK, ending the performance.

The giant looked a bit sorry now. Why would he look sorry!?

“That was very impressive, and your singing was a nice touch, but I think such things would best be done with a group. Alone it was underwhelming.”

What did he know! I’d danced my freaking ass off! I sat down and tried not to cry as I regained my strength. Why weren’t my best efforts good enough!? I was a Master bard. But I was at the mercy of the most subjective critic. I had to change tactics. Impressing him wasn’t going to cut it.

“Well, since it’s getting late,” he reached out a hand.

“Wait!” I shouted, nearly breaking my voice which would have been a death sentence.

The giant’s hand paused, “That was so bold I’m inclined to do so, but not for long.”

“You, liked my singing?” I asked.

The hand retreated. “You could say that.” Then he caught on. “Fine. One last chance.”

He leaned back, crossed his arms, and cleared his throat.

“Sing for me, little bard, and perhaps, I will consider not eating you.”

I scrambled to my ukulele. It was so old it was already out of tune, so I hurriedly tuned it, under the piercing gaze of the giant.

“Your voice isn’t magical is it?” Asked the giant as I tuned the ukulele.

I smiled “No, it is. My fey ancestry. Never really tested its power. Mostly I’ve transfixed crowds or made them cry with the opening notes. I’ve also played monsters to sleep.”

He leaned forward as I realized my mistake and quickly added “but that doesn’t work if you know about it! Which you now do!”

Thankfully he believed me. I was telling the truth, but there was no reason for him to trust me.

“Well, just make it a nice song. I’ve got sensitive ears.”

Oh fantastic. That meant he could probably tell if I went out of key. I had a moment’s thought to play something screeching and horrible, to make him bleed from his ears, giving me a chance to get away, or at least cause him pain before he ended my life. No. My first choice of song was probably the best one.

I sat down criss cross apple sauce, but back very straight. And I strummed the opening cords.

[

In the quiet mystic morning When the sun’s just graced the land O’er the horizon, lies a story And it begs to take my hand

Now that summer’s ceased its gleaming And the harvest’s past its prime In adventure I’ve found meaning But I’ll be homeward bound in time

Bind me not, to the pasture Chain me not to the town Set me free to find my calling And I’ll return to you somehow

As the first instrumental break started I turned my attention to the giant. His face was as stoney as ever. I wasn’t hitting my mark. So I continued.

If you find it’s me you’re missing And you’re hoping I’ll return To your thoughts I’ll soon be listing On the road I’ll stop and turn

The old strings were threatening to cut into my fingers but I just used the pain to fuel my voice, powering it with agony and sorrow. I saw the giant’s brows raise as my human sized voice grew to fill the giant room.

For the wind has set me racing As my journey now begins To leave the path I’ll be retracing When I’m homeward bound again

Bind me not, to the pasture Chain me not to the town Set me free to find my calling And I’ll return to you somehow

The second, and last, instrumental break. I had started crying at the chorus and couldn’t see the giant through my tears. My last performance, and it was for my murderer.

And still my song rang out.

In the quiet Mystic morning When the moon has gone to bed When adventure’s lost its meaning…

I’ll be homeward bound

Again

My ears were ringing from the sheer volume, I was clutching the Ukulele so hard it threatened to crack. I was numb from all my efforts. Now would be a great time for him to eat me, maybe I would feel no pain.

Then, as my ears and eyes cleared up, I saw.

The giant's eyes, red. Shiny trails of tears down his cheeks. His arms were still crossed but he looked like he was almost strangling himself. Still, I did not let myself feel any hope.

“Dammit,” he hissed and sniffed, “I should eat you for making me cry.”

No. No no no no no.

“But I won’t” he sniffed again and got out a handkerchief, “You’ve more than earned your life.”

I collapsed and started crying harder. I had done it. By the gods. I had fucking done it. I let myself melt into the table, half passing out. I didn’t want to feel or think for an entire week. I guess because he wasn’t going to kill me, the giant let me lay there.

When I finally sat up he was making tea! I very much wanted to get the fuck out of there but the tea smelled amazing, almost magical.

He noticed me moving.

“I find tea helps after a harrowing adventure,” he said cheerfully.

His demeanor was entirely different. His face was softer, his voice was higher, his dark brown eyes colder, but considering they had been blazing before, it was a friendly warmth now.

That really had been an adventure hadn’t it. One that really made use of my skill set. One that was perfect to turn into a story. It had great pacing too, with just a bit of tweaking. I’d already started writing out the flowery prose and accompanying staging in my head. My interpretive dance was going to be way better in the retelling, but don’t say anything to the guild alright? Everyone embellished.

I had to scramble away as he set the table, which meant setting down a smaller table and chair for me, and then bringing over his own cup and the teapot. He touched the sides of the pot that must be hot enough to scald skin from bone like it was nothing, pouring out near boiling tea. I watched mesmerized as he used a bit of magic to pour the tea into my teacup.

“Let it cool,” he said, as he took a drink of his own tea, “I’m not normally a fan of sweetened tea, but I thought a little extra honey would do your throat some good.”

I gingerly stood up and got into the chair. It was normal sized of course, since he was giant. But here I felt like a doll that some demonic girl had set up for a tea party.

“Thanks,” I said, and indeed my throat felt raw. I couldn’t wait to drink the tea, but it was still too hot.

“I should be thanking you,” said the giant, smiling and showing off his fangs, but it no longer felt so threatening, “That was quite a show! You must be a really high ranking bard.”

My face turned very red, “I- well I’m on probation,” I admitted, “blacklisted. So really, thanks for-”

I saw his eyes glitter, literally.

“You- you never meant to eat me did you?”

He grinned even wider, “No, but I trust you won't include that in your tale.”

I shook my head.

“I very much enjoy playing the big bad giant,” he mused, “But I have other work; I can’t have adventurers showing up all the time.”

Now I was curious, “If I may ask, what else do you do then?”

There was a short pause as he considered whether or not to tell me. I wondered if it was a grand secret.

“I’m a royal wizard,” he finally said, and there was a massive amount of pride underneath his tone. And resentment. That was concerning.

My jaw dropped, “You- A Royal Wizard?”

This might be the most interesting person I’d ever met. How did a giant, or giant-esq thing become a royal wizard!? How did a royal wizard end up running an evil tower?

“You already got one tale, but if you’re not inclined to leave so soon, I can give you another.”

I definitely knew where this was going and I definitely wanted this tale.

“But on one condition,” he said. “You cannot tell it until either I or the Mystic King is dead.”

“Are- you dying?” I asked.

He laughed, “No, but I am still a villain. I try to keep a fairly low profile, but any day a slayer could show up and succeed in killing me.”

That made sense, but now that I was not mortally terrified of him, I saw that this man was much younger than I’d previously thought. He looked barely 24, a young man, and he had to worry about slayers! It also meant it couldn’t have been in this job for that long, being evil must really suit him.

“Hopefully it won’t be for years, which will give you time to make this tale as grand as possible,” he continued.

He drank more of his tea.

“I’m not great story teller,” he started off, “but I suppose the tale of how a foolish half-giant with dreams of becoming a wizard, and ending up a prisoner in the woods, might be a good one.”

Prisoner? Even more layers. Yes. This should be a good one indeed.

Though he was right. Gods, wizards! They have no concept of narrative flow! They don’t leave out details!

And yet. It was riveting. Yonah HaEsh, for that was his name which I finally learned, was half giant, half FireWitch. His father, the FireWitch, got interested in magic, but he wanted more structured study, beyond what witches can do. So he disguised himself as human to attend school. He was found out eventually, expelled and arrested for infiltrating the kingdom as a dangerous magical monster. He was almost executed before he was offered a job here in the tower! And amazingly, the Grand Master of the school had taken pity on him and allowed him to continue his studies here and graduate, earning the right to call himself a wizard.

I had forgotten about my tea by the end and it had gone cold. That was an easy fix apparently: he pinched the cup between his thumb and pointer finger. A few seconds later it was steaming again.

I finally took a sip, it was incredible. I made a mental note to write a poem or a song about it. But I had other things to think about, to talk about.

“It’s a great story,” I said, with a cockiness I should have tried to keep in check, “but it needs a lot of work. It’s a good thing I’ve got a lot of time. I’ll need to go out and interview people.”

I stood up, “Which means, I need to hear it again.”

Yonah raised an eyebrow, “Oh?”

“I should have been taking notes,” I said, “I need more specific dates and times and names! Oh and if you can tell me how your parents met, that would make for a great prologue.”

He stood up too, clearing away his and my tea settings. But he didn’t clean them, just put them aside.

“In that case,” he said, returning and offering his hand palm up, “We should take this upstairs.”

I still hesitated a bit, but I sat on his hand and was transferred to his shoulder. I’d never been on a giant’s shoulder before. I was tempted to touch his curly hair, since mountain giants don’t have hair, I thought it amazing that this half-giant had such thick silky locks. I settled to lean a bit towards his head for steadiness. Yonah didn’t say anything as he regathered the teapot and cups, and even got a few pieces of berry-nut bread and goat cheese. Then headed up to the workshop.

Once again, he had a human sized desk that he set on his much larger one, and human sized pens (really nice ones), and a few human sized notebooks. Though I guess, since he can reduce to human size whenever he wanted (that was part of his “disguise”), and had many human friends, it made sense.

“We can go in order,” I said, “But I think I want to start on what you got up to in school. We want people to really get attached to you and your friends so that they are on your side by the trial.”

Yonah liked that idea. I think he wanted this story to show him in a positive light, even if he was officially evil.

We worked through the night. And my second cup of tea got cold.

[FIN]

[PLEASE REBLOG and/or tell me what you think in an ask/message!]

FOR REFERENCE, HERE’S HOW THE SONG SOUNDS: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VooU55wzSEc

Liked this Mystic Woods story? I have more!

For GT ONLY stories: gt-adventures.tumblr.com/tagged/mystic+woods+story

[I have to mention, that I have many more Mystic Woods stories, however those contain safe/soft non-sexual v/o/r/e... But lucky for you! i have filed them them separately! and (when needed) Every story comes with detailed content warnings!]

For ALL mystic woods stories:

vo/re-scientist/tumblr.com/tagged/mystic+woods+story (take out the “/” in vo/re)

[one or two of my GT-ONLY stories are on my not so secret vo/re blog but from now on I’m posting the GT-ONLY ones here! hurray!]

#gianttiny #g/t writing #g/t talk #giant/tiny #g/t #male giant

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cozyteez · 5 years

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Hii, do u have any tips for writing fics?? I’m so used to writing research reports, lab reports, and formal essays that creative writing has become something I really struggle with. I guess it’s having the freedom to write anything and not knowing how to make sure it’s not corny. I tried outlining a fic one time but it was so frustrating LOLOLOL. Anyways, I love your ateez fics. They are so cute and creative!!

hi !!!! im like rlly touched u asked me and i feel u actually that's why i started this blog; im a biomedical engineering major so as u can imagine i dont get to take much creativity with what i write because writing papers and reports and proposals are so formulaic and u gotta stick to the facts so that being said i actually tested out of all my college writing classes so all my writing knowledge is from ap english in hs lmao so take it w many grians of salt

the #1 thing i do when im feeling sort of unmotivated about a story or maybe like like dragging myself thru mud to write it is to just write the "fun" part first. to me the fun part is usually the climax or maybe the like the "wouldn't it be cute if..." moment that came to mind that inspired me to write a blurb in the first place! then usually once i sort of get the ball rolling on that my brain will help me out and keep the momentum going by thinking of maybe "oohh okay maybe this can happen next" or "oohh and what if this led up to it" or !! just stop there !! something ive learned from my mx writing blog which is like a year older than this one was that you don't owe anybody context especially for a blurb so maybe it really is just 3 sentences of a cute moment u thought of like its whatever ur the one writing it

now for longer fics im going to be honest jongho's first love is my first and only completed attempt at a multi stage coherent story. and that was fueled purely based on the fact that when i look at jongho he just gives off sort a really excited sort of innocence that i wanted to further explore and personify through the idea of him experiencing love for the first time but even then i really struggled w the last part because that's where my personal experience stopped and i had basically nothing to go off of because ive never been in love so i did have to kinda wait for ideas to come to me. for prince yunho i have posted 4 chapters but have all the way through chapter 15 drafted. and by drafted i mean it's like 3 sentences of the overall idea. again, the fic was inspired by the duality between yunho's on stage vs. off stage persona where if somebody was to watch an ateez performance for the first time they may find him very serious and maybe even intimidating but atiny would know that his off stage persona (the one he choses to create for us anyways) is very silly and happy-go-lucky and approachable, which is why prince yunho is seen as narameth's strong and stoic pride and joy but in reality he's sort of clumsy but means well. so i let that and his relationship w xenia who is an original character (OC) sort inspire stories or interactions that i force into a plot line. so for example i believe when i first started thinking abt a prince au for yunho i thought "wouldn't it be funny if the first scene started out painting him as this strong and serious man and then cut to him choking on food or something" and that sort of inspired the idea of him being nervous abt the speech and then xenia came out of that because he needed a complementary character imo since i knew he was gonna be kind of one dimensional and then his backstory with xenia inspired other ideas and then one day i was sad and wanted a hug so that inspired a piece of the plot line and so on. so basically: let an idea or even an aspect of somebody come to you and just write it down, let it inspire other ideas. and don't be afriad to completely start over. i wrote a whole chapter for prince yunho and deleted the whole thing because i hated where it was going and started back from scratch. sometimes you have to revisit things abt your characters and their relationships with others to get a new idea. there's a story in every person and every relationship you just have to find the clues

here's an example of what i mean by "write the good part first". this is typically what the very first draft of a blurb will look like for me

((( blah blah blah basically its raining and y/n is sad bc wooyoung broke her heart two weeks ago idk maybe go into it maybe not)))

y/n is all sad and feeling sorry for themselves on the couch theyre past crying but still feel pretty shitty plus it's storming and cold outside. great

there's a knock on their door ofc they have the cliche "who could that be moment" even tho they lowkey know. we literally all know

so yeah wooyoung's there soaked in rain eyes puffy y/n thinks he's been crying

-this would be the "fun part". i'll fix all that garbage up top later or maybe even change it completely idk yet-

"y/n? i - uh. hi"

he sheepishly rubbed the back of his neck while you crossed your arms over your chest, fighting the urge to close the door and walk away for good

"hi? really wooyoung? is that the best you can do?"

(((wooyoung does smth idk)))

"well i just -"

"you just what? showed up here in the rain after you broke my heart and didn't even bother to tell me why? this isn't some romance movie, asshole. you can't just come here late at night and expect to find me all sad and willing to take you back because i'm not. so say what you're gonna say so i can get back to my life"

your face was red hot and you trying very hard, probably too hard, to fight back tears. ((( idk talk some more abt y/n's emotions then what wooyoung is doing)))

"look, i made a mistake i-"

"oh my god! why did i know you were gonna do this. i just knew as soon as i saw you-"

"will you let me get a fucking word in!?"

well that was new. in the entire time you'd known him he had never raised his voice at you like that, your shock causing you to immediately close your mouth and fold your arms back into yourself (((make y/n seem more scared))) noticing your reaction, he lowered his voice back down and instictively reached for you, heartbroken at the way you jerked away from his touch

"please y/n, i'm sorry. i didn't mean to raise my voice it's just that i need to tell you that i regret what i did i regret breaking up with you so fucking much and you don't have to take me back i just need you to know how much you meant, no, mean to me. i still love you, a lot. there's not a day, an hour, a minute, or a single second that goes by that i'm not thinking of you"

"then why?"

your voice was small and wavering, your tears now dangerously close to spilling down your cheeks

"why what?"

"why did you break up with me like that, just all of a sudden"

he pushed his hands into his pockets and looked away

"because that morning i woke up before you and when i looked at you asleep next to me, i saw myself spending the rest of my life with you and it scared the shit out of me"

"why did it scare you?"

"because i just figured you didn't feel the same. i was selfish and wanted to save myself heartbreak down the line and so i told you i didn't wanna be with you anymore, but that was a mistake because it turns out i can't function with out you, i can't breathe without you i can't live without you, y/n. i shouldn't have let you go"

tears were now freely flowing down your face (((okay brain no work anymore y/n kisses him duh and then ofc they make up wooyoung prob says smth cheesy and y/n is like ur lucky i love you or smth ahaha the end)))

tl;dr -> don't be afraid to get messy. creative writing is not nearly as structured as academic/scientific writing. write whatever u want first it can even be the middle of a huge fight scene or some dialogue u think is funny. if ur stuck read what you have or maybe just take a break and let an idea come to you. a story doesnt have to come together til the very end so it can be as messy and out of order as u want until u wanna post it. also i would always use the third person omniscient point of view for a longer story like a chaptered fic as a default and only change if it would impact the plot in a negative way. this is where the narrator knows what every character is thinking/feeling and im p sure a teacher in middle school told me it was the easiest to write and follow

#sorry i got carried away #also rmbr how i was like my brain cant stop imagining dramatic and disgusting love confessions in the rain? i meant like that #it's so chessy ik 😔 bleh #amanda talks

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ahumansvoid · 4 years

Text

Misc WIP Folder

So I’m going through my WIPs folder’s subfolders.

One is labelled Misc, so that’s the one I’m going through now. Everything will be below the cut because this will probably be a long post, there are sixteen files in this folder.

Most of them are from different fandoms, so I’ll put what fandom it’s in + what title I have for it in my folder in bold before I talk about it. I’ll be going from oldest to newest. Technically not because I can’t sort Google docs like that, but rather “last modified by me” so, longest abandoned to newly abandoned I guess?

Also Spoilers for any of the fandoms, maybe? Probably.

If you have any questions about any of the fandoms, message me or send me an ask. I’m open to talking about any and all of them.

Fandoms Involved (Ordered by appearance):

Murdered: Soul Suspect (Video Game)

Trollhunters: Tales of Arcadia (TV Show)

Gravity Falls (TV Show)

Until Dawn (Video Game)

Avatar: The Last Airbender (TV Show)

The Mummy (2017) & (1999) (Movies)

Assassination Classroom (TV Show/Anime)

Red vs. Blue (Online Show- Rooster Teeth)

Camp Camp (Online Show - Rooster Teeth)

Dirk Gently’s Holistic Detective Agency (TV Show)

Devil May Cry (Video Game + Anime)

Aladdin (2019) (Movie)

Castlevania (TV Show)

Murdered: Soul Suspect - MSS

So there isn’t much in this one, just a bullet pointed outline. Murdered Soul Suspect is a video game, if you don’t know it and are curious you can google it or message me.

Anywho. This is just a little part I thought was funny.

It’s essentially a Ronan survives AU of the game, pretty standard and I thought it would be fun. Honestly this part about Ronan and his cracked spine just reminded me of Obi-wan and how I write him in ignoring his injuries (and how most people write him) so it made me laugh a bit.

There’s really not much here, I didn’t even finish the outline.

Trollhunters: Tales of Arcadia - trollhunters au

I am very creative with my titles. Clearly. This is another bullet point outline. but this one is longer and irrc I actually started writing this, and that file would also be in this folder so if I did write it’ll also be featured on this post.

This is an au where Claire is the trollhunter rather than Jim.

The top bit is literally just for context on the next star point. Anywho Writing AAARRRGGGHH/ seeing it spelled out is funny to me. Also I’m pretty sure I rewatched bits with AAARRRGGGHH with subtitles on to see how it was spelt and then replicated that.

The second star point is funny to me because I describe annoyance/anger (rightful, both of them) as pissy. And that’s funny.

There’s more but if I’m write and I wrote it out, then that’ll be featured later.

Gravity Falls - Gravity Falls

... Okay I’m not creative with titles until I have to be. Once more, bullet point outline. So this is an after-canon AU where Bill left a remanent of himself in Dipper and it’s become apparent when they’re in Piedmont.

I just like the rules I had Dipper give Bill. I thought they were neat. Also, I like Mabel convincing Dipper to let Bill live because he’s pathetic. This is a demon who has tormented them for an entire summer, but nows he’s pathetic so lets help him.

Not much of interest in this. I probably didn’t write it because it’d be a long and day-in-the-life type fic. It’d just be Dipper and Bill coexisting and going through life and IDK how well I’d of written that. So I didn’t write it.

Until Dawn- Until DAwn AU

FYI I’m keeping the titles case-sensitive. Another bullet outline. So this is a Josh survives/exorcised AU, also an Everybody Live AU. I’m pretty sure I wrote this when I was heavily invested in Until Dawn and Josh (because I like him.) And I was reading Until Dawn fanfic in which Josh is blamed for what happened on the mountain. And I think I was getting pissy which lead to this:

So in this AU the Until Dawn Group splintered into Sam, Josh & Chris, and Mike, Emily, Jess, Matt & Ashley. So this conversation/fight is between Chris and the second group. So Chris is the 1st,3rd and 5th talking bullet point. I don’t know who’s talking in the 2nd &4th bullet point but it’s one of the second group. Probably Emily, Mike or Jess maybe. Not Ashley.

Im 90% sure that I wrote out this entire outline just for this little interaction.

It just tickles my id. I still kind of like it, but I honestly don’t know what else I’d write for this AU.

Avatar: The Last Airbender - Zuko is the avatar

Title is self-explanatory. Also, I really like bullet outlines. So. Anywho.

Aang is still a 12 year old in this, he used up all his “avatar energy” (that’s literally what I wrote) to keep himself alive so he’s just an airbender now.

I just love Iroh. And this is just funny to me.

If I ever wrote this, it’d be a lot of hijinks of Katara and Aaang (and eventually Toph) covering for Zuko whenever he bends anything other than fire. More cracky than serious.

“The Mummy (2017)” and “The Mummy (1999)” - Mummy x Mummy

I watched the 2017 version of the mummy (got it from the library for 2 bucks) and since there are some throwbacks to the 1999 movie I decided to try to combine them. This also became an AU where Evie and Rick save Imhotep in Mummy 2, and due to Evie being revived meant she was functionally immortal (doesn’t age, but can still be killed). And due to everything, by the Mummy 2017 rolls around it’s just her and Imhotep hanging around, investigating ancient egypt and whatnot.

Honestly this is just part of the outline. None of this is really amusing to me, just, if I ever tried to write it, a lot of work. Although, the fact that I can’t remember the blonde lady friend from the Mummy 2017 is kind of amusing and I literally call her ‘BLF’ throughout this entire outline. I think her name was Lisa. Or Sara.

i’ll google it.

Assassination Classroom - AC AU

At this point, I might as well tell you when it isn’t a bullet outline than saying when it is.

This was really just a Reaper/Koro-sensei raises Nagisa rather than his mom.

People panicking around children is amusing to me. Again, long AU. And this was probably an excuse to write some baby assassin Nagisa and whatnot. Honestly whenever I read this I do remember more details on this, that I have never written down.

Murdered: Soul Suspect - Murdered: Soul Suspect

...

Okay I think this is just a repeat of the one I posted earlier???

I- I don’t know what this was? Like this is newer than the other one?

?????

Uh, brain weirdness?

Let’s move on.

Trollhunters: Tales of Arcadia - TRollhunters

Ok! So this is the written out of the bullet point earlier. I did not write out much. But I’ll talk about it a bit more? So this AU is also a Bular survives and Jim finds him and helps AU.

This is literally all I have written. So, right after this, Jim would find an injured Bular and helps him. There isn’t much to add, but I will add what I had written as Barbara’s reaction from the outline:

Large AU, but it would be fun to write. I would most likely end up writing Claire’s journey of Trollhunting along with Jim’s adventures with Bular.

Red vs Blue - Meta, no, that wasn’t, he wasn’t

Okay, that’s not the full title but also the full title is literally the first sentence. Which is a long one so you get part of it. This is actually a written au, it’s about Agent Maine/ The Meta surviving and meeting up with Siris. This is just the first couple paragraphs:

Nothing I read was particularly funny to me, so just the first two paragraphs. Essentially what would’ve happened is Siris would help Maine find Washington (on Chorus) go to Chorus. Find Felix and Locus. Drama Ensues.

I might actually write this. Maybe. There’s potential, if the drive hits me.

I havent watched RvB in a couple of years, but I did like the series. It was interesting.

Camp Camp- Camp Camp

Y’know since this is ‘misc’ I get just having fandom names. Lot easier to identifiy.

So, this file is currently loading still, but I remember this. It wasn’t that long ago. This wasn’t so much a fic as a comic I would of like to have done. I definitely would’ve needed to brush up on my art skills (I am mediocre at best) but it’s just a small little comic I would’ve done on Camp Camp.

First little bit. I actually wrote out most of this rather than just bullet pointing it.

There is a little bit I’d have to polish up, but I could probably post this entire thing. But I kind of want to actually do the comic first. But boy that’s a lot of work.

I love how most of the reason I’m not writing these is that they’re a lot of work.

Dirk Gently’s Holistic Detective Agency (TV Show) - Project Cheron

This is an AU where Priest is one of the projects of Blackwing. Specifically Cheron and I think my reasoning is that he makes people go where they need to be. IDK. I actually wrote a couple of these. But this one is essentially Priest getting a bunch of projects together to help something. Idk.

This entire thing is weird and would probably be labelled crack if I ever finished it.

Okay. This entire scene is funny to me. Just, this girl rushing out in front of the car waving happily with a decapitated head in her hand. I like it. So, Aine and Herodias are OCs. Both are projects Priest is collecting.

Dirk Gently’s Holistic Detective Agency (TV Show) - “Dirk

Another Priest is a Blackwing Project AU but that’s not really the focus of this story. This story is about a project (Project Carman- OC) who can trap people in their certain significant memories of her choosing. Carman gets annoyed at Bart, Dirk and the Rowdy 3 so she traps them in memories signifcant to their stay in Blackwing and Priest.

I’ve only written 2 of the six memories, so that’d be fun to complete. These are also just sad. They’re not happy memories. So, random moment that’s somewhat amusing:

Also, title is the first sentence in the fic.

Devil May Cry - “Should I

I- why did I decide to do this from oldest to newest? Part of me is embarrassed, the other part is reminding me I have no reason to be? It’s a video game fic. But also this is a game of my childhood. It’s about Nero looking for his dad and finding Dante instead. Canonically Dante’s twin brother, Vergil, is Nero’s dad.

Just a random moment because I didn’t write that much of it. Also I thought it was kind of cute. Patty shows up in the Devil May Cry anime. Which I watched before I played the games.

Aladdin (2019) - Aladdin AU

A mix of bullet outline and written. I don’t actually have much of this AU, but essentially before Aladdin wishes to become a prince, he notices some mercenaries kidnapping a little girl and decides to rescue her.

This girl is the princess of Shiroba, Aladdin takes her back to Shiroba. The Queen/ Sultana appreciates Aladdin going out of his way to help her so she invites him to stay in the palace.

Eventually word gets to Shiroba that Agrabah is planning to attack so Aladdin and the two twin princes of Shiroba (that I made up, OCs) make a plan to infiltrate and see what they’re planning. They’re not planing espionage, but as Shiroba is a peaceful nation, they want to see if they should start evacuating people and whatnot.

So you get the Prince Ali stuff with the Genie and yada yada.

I have none of that written. I just know that’s what I intended to do with it.

So, first little bit. Long AU that would take a lot of work. Also, I know this isn’t super popular but I liked the 2019 version of Aladdin. I really like the changes they made.

Castlevania (TV Show) - Waking up in Jail wasn’t a new experience

Again, title is first sentence. Not writing that out. Anywho, this is a kind of complete canon AU to Castlevania. Essentially we haven’t reached Lisa getting burnt at the stake yet. So, loving Dracula fam. Trevor and Sypha meet earlier due to circumstance. Alucard gets attacked by something and gets rescued by Trevor and Sypha. They travel together for a while. And then Sypha and Trevor get to meet Alucard’s parents.

That’s where this AU will go if I ever write it. To be fair, last time I wrote in this file was March, so I guess that’s technically possible. Don’t hold out hope.

First couple of paragraphs.

Also, that’s it! Misc WIP folder done!

Oh, if you’ve made it this far, a)thank you and b) if you want to continue/write any of these, go ahead, but tag me or send me a link. I will be very happy to see/read what you create if you like any of this in an inspo way.

Also. This is long, so, IDK if Imma go through the other folders rn. Maybe tomorrow.

#a humans wip fic folder #a human yelling into the void #my writing #WIPs #Wip #Fanfiction #multiple fandoms #I'm not going to tag all of them.

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thegeminisage · 5 years

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i have deep and conflicting thots about the gilli episode (3.11)

they’re long (they’re LONG!!!) so here’s a cut. you’re welcome

good things:

this is the ANTITHESIS to everything i was complaining about last night. this is what i was CRAVING. this show did me so good (and yet, so bad - more on that in a sec)

there was a touch of outside pov here (my weakness) since we got to see who merlin was from gilli’s point of view

and when i say we got to see who merlin was i mean we really for real got to SEE WHO HE WAS oh babey

something gilli said in this episode was that merlin has been pretending so long he forgot who he was and i think similarly he pretends so well that we the audience (me anyway) also kind of forget who he is because we see it SO rarely

but we saw it here! in this episode merlin was SMART?? those aren’t two words i’d normally use in the same sentence without sticking a “is not” between them but he WAS - he cottoned on right away that gilli was using magic, he confronted him immediately and in a way that didn’t invoke hostility (and what a nice little flip, what a TREAT to see someone else freaking out and covering their ass while merlin is keeping his cool), (some of) his normal little jabs at arthur were a tad wryer/slyer on the delivery, and he figured out, ON HIS OWN, how to save both gilli and uther, and used his magic in front of ALL THOSE PEOPLE without getting caught

and speaking of that, merlin being like “he’s braver than me, using magic in front of all those people” and gaisu going “brave or stupid” like... ok, at first my reaction was: come on, merlin uses magic in front of people ALL THE TIME...but when i think about it, my very own self was complaining just yesterday that he was keeping his shit buttoned up way too tightly. and i did notice merlin himself waiting until backs were turned more often, incantating aloud less often...he ACTUALLY HAS gotten less stupid, JUST a smidgen. i didn’t even realize

merlin seemed more grown-up and serious in this episode than he has in the entire series. maybe it’s the fact that he had someone younger and dumber to play off of (and i don’t think gilli was a strong enough character to carry an episode, but maybe it was enough to give us an excuse to develop merlin so much) but he did in fact seem WISE, and he seemed TIRED, which is a thing grownups usually are... the way he talked to the other characters seemed different too - he spoke to the dragon as an equal (last dragon & last dragonlord), not as some dumbass in over his head asking for help (very nice also that he didn’t go to gaius for advice but someone more on “his level”). he gave arthur clear and frank advice on how to go about fighting his dad, he STUCK UP FOR GILLI AGAINST GAIUS (backbone! compassion!) and then STUCK UP FOR HIMSELF against gilli!!!!!

(i like a slightly more serious merlin because while quirky dumbass country hick merlin IS charming and endearing that charm can only carry him so far without more meat involved, especially after some of the terrible things we’ve seen him suffer through and all the experiences he’s had to grow and change)

i have mixed feelings about merlin showing his magic to this particular person at this particular time, but i do also like that he was willing to open up about WHO HE IS if it could potentially save a life. that shows backbone. and it shows integrity. two things i was sorely missing from merlin before now

speaking of merlin’s integrity, we finally got to cover why he keeps saving uther, who he should hate and despise and want dead, which i have been DYING for

merlin and gilli have a sort of professor x/magneto stance about uther, by which i mean one of them argues that they should change things from within the system to court goodwill and avoid violence because acting violently would just make their detractors’ point for them, and the other argues that the system should be destroyed entirely through any means necessary because violence is the only language the oppressor understands

on a rewatch what really stands out to me is merlin chastising gilli at the end by saying “you’re better than that.” it makes me think of season 1 when merlin had the chance to let morgana’s allies assassinate uther and he asks gwen what he should do - gwen, who also has every reason to hate and despise uther, tells merlin that to allow him to die through inaction would be just as bad as murdering him directly, and that that would make merlin as bad uther is

i don’t want to give the people who fucked morgana over so thoroughly too much credit but it makes me wonder if that wasn’t when merlin decided that he was going to be the bigger man

he says it himself in this episode, near tears - it is LONELY, being what he is, and doing what he does. he could kill a man with a thought and he spends all his time mucking stables and polishing armor and when he gets a break from that it’s to save someone’s life without endangering his own. it is dangerous, tireless work for which he believes he will NEVER get any thanks. and what i was so frustrated about before was not understanding WHY - did he care THAT much about arthur’s feelings, that he couldn’t stand to watch arthur lose a father? was he just THAT afraid of uther and what uther would do to him if he found out?

but i get it now - it’s because he CHOOSES to. not to protect arthur or to protect himself but because he wholly believes that he’s playing the long game and he’s on the correct path to seeing a future where what he is is no longer outlawed - god, his FACE when he says “when that day arrives, we WILL be free”

again not to overcredit the writers bc i DON’T think they were smart enough to do this on purpose but like in my heart he decided all the way back in season 1 that he wasn’t going to take the easy way out and just let uther die because THAT’S NOT WHAT MAGIC IS FOR. he’s stronger than everyone else around him and HE CHOOSES to keep his head down and wait it out because in his OWN WORDS “magic is not meant to bring you glory.” even gilli agrees - when used for personal gain, it is very easy for the power of the magic to corrupt. i thought merlin was weak, to have saved uther’s life so many times - but to resist that kind of temptation and corruption over and over, he’s actually the opposite. he doesn’t try so hard to protect the monarchy because he lacks self-respect or integrity, he protects the monarchy BECAUSE OF his self-respect and integrity. all along, he’s been fighting for a better future too - just in his way, not the way gilli or morgana would

and speaking of morgana...here’s the bad:

i. am. LIVID!!!!!

that merlin would tell this boy he BARELY KNOWS his secret in order to maybe possibly save this kid’s life and NOT TELL MORGANA in her worst hour of need when she most needed a friend

merlin got a whole lot more respect from me today but the fact remains that he’s a LYING LIAR WHO LIES and he has tried to kill morgana two and a half times (the poison, the bump on the head, knocking her off her horse) and as of the end of season 3 also MURDERED HER SISTER THAT IS APPARENTLY ALSO LOWKEY HER GIRLFRIEND (i know)

which really clashes with his whole deal that i just described above, of using his magic for good and not evil purposes, for trying to win over hearts instead of win battles. and it’s funny that it’s ONLY morgana that merlin acts out of character for...i think it’s because! and this is a crazy concept! the writers hate morgana!

morgana in season 1 and most of season 2 was a kind and loving person. she was a true ally to gwen and often used her status as the king’s ward to stand up for gwen when gwen was in trouble. the first time she tried to have uther killed it was because of what happened to gwen’s father. she was more than capable of feeling love and knowing right from wrong and doing what she believed was right at any cost as evidenced by her helping to sneak the little druid kid out of the castle at risk to herself

morgana in season 3 does nothing but smirk evilly. and while it’s a good look on her and she’s MORE than valid in wanting to fuck up merlin and uther and maybe even arthur too from a certain viewpoint her aggression against gwen is ENTIRELY unwarranted

even trying my BEST to be sympathetic towards her and remember what she’s gone through and that her bad characterization is the fault of the writers and not morgana herself it is VERY hard not to hate her when you see her delighting in gwen’s misery and watching her PANIC about gwen’s future as the queen was FAR more satisfying than it should have been because i was then delighting in MORGANA’S misery and that is NOT a feeling im comfy with

in fact! im furious! the fact that this gilli kid got a more sympathetic portrayal than morgana ever will makes me SEE RED!!! imagine if the professor x/magneto vibe had been played out with merlin and morgana throughout the entirety of season 3! imagine morgana still had feelings other than ~edgy evulz~ and kept trying to kill uther BECAUSE SHE BELIEVED IT WAS RIGHT but had no quarrel with people like gwen who had always loved her! imagine her being conflicted when there was every chance that gwen would die during the takeover! imagine how her feelings could have become even more complicated when she found out she had living family - a father and brother, one of whom she is plotting to kill! imagine her NOT wanting harm to come to gwen or arthur and trying to persuade them to her side with good yet flawed arguments! imagine uther having to face the fact that the daughter he dotes on is also the thing he hates! people talk about arthur’s conflict if he realizes merlin is magic, but he’s known merlin a lot less time than he’s known morgana and merlin’s not his sister, imagine arthur had to deal with that conflict of interests! we could have HAD IT ALL in season 3 and instead season 3 MOSTLY SUCKS

what if morgana had remembered how fucked up arthur was about learning about the true circumstances of his birth? what if she had persuaded him that uther’s stance against magic was wrong? what if she knew merlin had magic but she hated him so she blackmailed him with it? he could have told her and then spent the ENTIRETY of season 3 shitting himself about it and it would have TOTALLY JUSTIFIED how shifty he got later after gaius taught him how to lie.what if he had SEEN what choosing to hurt other people had wrought in morgana and truly felt remorse and it informed his character for the rest of the show and that’s why he’s always choosing the moral high ground! there were SO MANY possibilities that could have opened up by having morgana be even just a little bit 3-dimensional!!!

which brings me to my next complaint: as good as this episode was, as much as i loved it, as glad as i am to finally understand merlin or at the very least have an interpretation of him i’m happy with, i should not have had to wait ALL SEASON to get there. i know what kind of show this is but they could have slipped some of this stuff in WAY EARLIER so i didn’t have to spent the entirety of season 3 and quite a lot of season 2 thinking merlin was just some spineless fuckup

also i will say it again, gilli was NOT strong enough to have carried this episode. the work on merlin’s character was INCREDIBLE and it was fun enough to see gilli mirror who he was in early season 1 but imagine how much better it could have been if he’d gotten to play off of someone like morgana - gilli’s a one-off character, and he has to tell us about his history and struggles, but morgana’s struggle is something we’ve witnessed firsthand. when she makes her own arguments about how hard it is to be magic under uther’s rule it comes from a place of deep pain that could have and should have resonated with merlin just as deeply as gilli’s.

morgana works MUCH better as a foil to merlin because all the way back in season 1 when they were both angry on gwen’s behalf and both wanted uther to pay for what he’d done so that no more innocent people would die it was MORGANA who chose the magneto route and merlin who decided to go professor x. they had the potential to make something REALLY COOL out of that AND THEY DIDN’T and what makes me so mad about this episode is that the sheer CONCEPT of this was good enough to have carried the entire season and yet they crammed it into a single 45-minute block

here end my thots i guess, in conclusion morgana deserved better

#personal #merlin blogging #liz's meta #liz's merlin stuff #despite my very big problems with how this was executed #i did love it quite a bit #very good timing that just last night i was complaining about merlin the character #that i didn't see enough meat to him #and then today i am given THIS #watching merlin live must have been like torture #but i've finally got my angle to him #maybe it's not the correct one or the one most people would prefer #but it's the one i like & can get behind #that speech at the end...#his very own mini-2.08 moment #i don't expect any character consistency or anything i don't expect it to hold #but still.#liz makes stuff

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kalperun · 5 years

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Zebra (BSD, aku/atsu)

To my dear friend @whyis-every-username-taken and her wonderful BSD OC James Michener who can read the memories of people by looking into their eyes. It is also to be noted that he helped Akutagawa get out of the port mafia and join another ability group known as the Degenerates and helped solidify the relationship between Atsushi and Akutagawa.

Atsushi was never one to blatantly ditch unfinished work. Work that only needed a couple more pen strokes to pass Kunikida’s microscopic gaze of judgement before going on a lunch break. But these past few weeks, as soon as he saw that the clock struck noon, meaning that he was now allowed to leave for his hourly scheduled lunch, Atsushi found himself jumping straight out of his seat, towing his bag with him, and heading out the door in one quick fluid motion.

A fluid motion that should be reserved for signing his name at the bottom of his paperwork, something that he tended to forget. And Kunikida kept reminding him of that fact with increasing annoyance.

Besides Kunikida’s throbbing vein in his temple that Atsushi was positive would explode one day, it was as if he was more than eager to leave the closing walls of the ADA. As if he was more than jubilant to be rid of his co-workers; an excitement that was equal to Dazai’s past happiness when he finally found a method of suicide that was both a marvelous experience as it was completely painless.

But Atsushi never meant anything offensive by his quick need to leave as soon as the second hand met ‘noon’. He simply had places to be. Places and perhaps also something that he could be tending to. The ADA wasn’t his entire life after all. He had school and other people such as James to meet up with.

So when people such as Tanizaki raised an eyebrow at his rushed departure, and Ranpo merely stared at Atsushi with a look that told him he was more than willing to keep quiet in exchange for some candy, Atsushi learned to ignore it but always come back with said candy.

Mostly because some things were just not meant to be told. Some things were just meant to remain secret. It wasn’t necessarily lying. He simply wasn’t speaking about his lunches ime endeavors with a certain person.

That certain person who had pulled him straight into the alleyway by the ADA, hand covering his mouth as Atsushi held back a yelp until he realized who it was he was looking at.

“Were you followed?” Akutagawa asked without wasting a second as he released Atsushi, taking a moment to skillfully glance out the alleyway while remaining attached to the shadows.

“I know I wasn’t part of the port mafia and had all that ninja training you had, but I am part of the ADA,” Atsushi took a moment to remind. Although, he was slightly annoyed at the fact that Akutagawa had once again unexpectedly pulled him out from the street with unnecessary force. But on the upside at least he hadn’t used Rashoumon to do it. This time.

Akutagawa simply returned back to Atsushi’s side, an eyebrow quirked at the weretiger before he started to walk. “You’re skills in stealth are still mediocre at best.”

Okay, perhaps Akutagawa was a bit on the bullseye there but that didn’t mean that Atsushi wasn’t going to be defensive about it. “I’m not bad. It’s just not being in my tiger form can make it - difficult.” Weak argument, but at least Akutagawa was pitying him enough to not shatter the last defense he had against his pride. So in a last ditch effort to keep the ex-mafioso from speaking further he grabbed his hand, his arm pressed against the others own as they made their way out the opposite end of the alley, walking briskly down the street.

“Any plans on where you want to eat this time?” Atsushi asked as he looked up at the other. “I know you seemed to like that curry place from last week. We could go there again.”

All he received in response though was a rather unresponsive hum. Atsushi didn’t mind though. Akutagawa had things to look out for currently. Such as other ADA agents going out on lunch break. Only just one concern, but the biggest concern you can have when you’re trying to keep your relationship a secret.

“This way.” Akutagawa suddenly spoke up, gripping Atsushi’s hand tighter as he kept his head low, hand now wrapping around Atsushi’s shoulders urging him to do the same as the sides of their bodies were pressed against each other. It didn’t help that Atsushi had such distinctive hair, but it did help a bit when using their guise as a couple to allow attention to wash over them.

But it wasn’t a guise. And that was made evident as soon as they found themselves on a park bench, store bought bento boxes sitting between them as they ate their lunch in relative peace. There was nothing but the cool wind against their backs, miraculous shade casting over them thanks to the hanging cherry blossom tree that would not bloom until months to come.

This is what Atsushi has been doing everyday for the past few weeks.

Ever since James got them both to be cordial with each other, and to talk, they started to meet up on their own. After all, Dazai was pushing for them to be partners, not in the way Chuuya and him are ‘partners’ currently, but partners out in the field. Because with their abilities combined they were nearly unstoppable.

So with Dazai training them to be partners and then James pushing them towards toleration of each other and then friends...well. That’s how Akutagawa and him ended up here. Sharing a bench and eating bento boxes together as they began yet another lunch date.

“You said yesterday that you had a mission with the Degenerates. How did it go?” Atsushi asked around a mouthful of rice, never really having the courtesy to swallow then talk. A flaw that Akutagawa has pointed out but never held against him. Atsushi already lacked enough confidence in the area of dating. Let alone dating your suppose-to-be mortal enemy. Best not to think about such things.

Akutagawa huffed, his bento box set neatly on his lap as he regarded the question almost thoughtfully. Atsushi could just see the creases between his almost-existent eyebrows as he figured out how to answer. If Atsushi lacked in dating his once-upon-a-time-enemy - who tried to kill him multiple times but the action was mutual - then Akutagawa definitely lacked in the same area.

It was unusual at first. For the both of them. From trying to be each other’s demise, to then sharing coffee, and then kissing… He wondered if this was what it was like for Chuuya and Dazai.

“It was fine,” Akutagawa admitted. “It’s just sometimes strange remembering that the Special Abilities Division used to watch me closely, and now I’m technically working for them.”

Atsushi laughed at that. “A lot of things have changed. But perhaps for the better…” He let the sentence hang though, as if hoping for Akutagawa to continue, which to his credit he did.

“I know. Between me and you, then Gin and I being apart of the Degenerates. The only thing that hasn’t changed is Dazai pushing us to be the next soukoku.”

“I don’t think that’s too bad though. As long as it doesn’t interfere too much with my school work and things at the ADA, I am sure we can achieve the goal of being what Yokohama needs.”

“The next soukoku?” Akutagawa asked for clarification.

“Yeah, except the name doesn’t fit.” Atsushi thought out loud as he stuffed another rice ball into his mouth. “I mean - double black? I contrast that color and you have that whole Rogue from X-men hairstyle going on.”

“And I am sure that you must know that I can’t understand a single word you’re saying.” Akutagawa deadpanned as he set aside his now empty bento box, unable to hear the weretiger over the cluster of rice in his mouth.

Atsushi almost choked as a laugh tried to build its way out through his throat, but with a well-timed swallow he was able to avoid the embarrassment. “I was saying that the name ‘soukoku’ doesn’t fit.”

Akutagawa paused in thought before giving a slow nod of agreement. “I suppose I see your point. But it would be simpler to just go with ‘shin soukoku’ and move on.”

“Sure, it’s simpler but it’s not as fun.” Atsushi argued before it dawned on him. “Oh! I got it!” He stated as he turned his entire body to Akutagawa, mustering the most serious face he possessed and with - miraculously - an unwavering voice he said, “Zebra.”

Akutagawa stared at Atsushi. “No.”

“Yes.”

“No.”

“Yes.”

“Atsushi,” Akutagawa breathed out his first name. “We’re not calling ourselves zebra.” He tried to urge as Atsushi only started laughing. “It’s not funny.”

“But it is!”

“We’re not calling ourselves zebra.” Akutagawa said with a tone of finality, causing Atsushi to pout as he finished off his own bento box.

“You have no idea what great opportunity you’re missing. Zebras are majestic creatures.”

“Uh huh,” Akutagawa hummed with the amount of fucks he gave which was zero.

“And,” Atsushi waved his hand in the air as he stood up with his empty bento box, his bag slung across his shoulder. “It fits our white and black aesthetic.”

With an over dramatic eye roll that could send the earth spinning the other way, Akutagawa only shook his head as he fell into step with Atsushi, both of them taking a moment to throw away their bento boxes before continuing on.

“I think James would approve.”

Akutagawa quirked an eyebrow. “Even if James was offered the option between a million yen or adopting an orphaned ability user who would kill him in the middle of the night, he would still choose the orphaned ability user. So his ‘approval’ does little to change my mind.”

Atsushi snorted as he let out a laugh, nudging Akutagawa with his shoulder as he did so. “And yet here you are, out of the port mafia because of his influence. I smell a liar.”

Atsushi could feel the small glare that Akutagawa was giving him, but he knew it was playful and he didn’t mean anything by it. “Speaking of James, you haven’t looked him in the eye have you?”

Chewing on his bottom lip he gave a nod as he sighed heavily. “I think he knows I’m avoiding his gaze on purpose at this point. But you have seen him a couple times this past couple weeks, haven’t you? Was he suspicious of you as well?”

A small shake of his head led to a small breath of relief for the weretiger. “Partly. James does tend to think the best of us. So I don’t think he’ll identify this as distrust or malice but he would be worried. He might end up asking what’s wrong eventually…”

“And when he does what do we say? I don’t like lying.” Atsushi wasn’t even good at lying to begin with. And lying to people when he had their trust? He wasn’t keen on breaking that trust. James being no exception to that rule whatsoever. “Even all this sneaking around feels like lying. But I don’t want to tell everyone about us. At least not now.”

Atsushi knew that people wouldn’t mind him and Akutagawa being together, but Atsushi also wanted to keep this to himself just for now because he didn’t feel ready for his relationship with him to come out yet. He knew that Gin knew about them, and Atsushi didn’t mind and actually liked having at least one person know, but for now, he just had to figure things out.

Between school, the ADA, becoming Dazai’s dream team, Atsushi needed to figure out where his relationship with Akutagawa fit in this entire mess that was called his ‘life’. On the bright side Akutagawa understood that and the sneaking around gave some excitement to the relationship.

With the Degenerate sneaking into his apartment at night so the both of them could watch some bad rom-com, or just talk and cuddle in bed together, or just go out like this together, it was nice and fun. Like Dazai’s suicides it was a marvelous experience and completely painless.

“We wait then. That’s all there is to it.” Akutagawa’s words made it all sound so simple, but at some point even he knew that Atsushi was going to need a small push for this to work.

Smiling brightly at the man beside him clothed in all black, with a sleek pair of sunglasses, he wrapped his arm around his. “Looks like we’ll make good partners after all. But about zebra-” Atsushi didn’t get to finish the sentence as quite suddenly he was pulled into the nearest alleyway for the second time that day, Akutagawa pressing Atsushi against the wall, Rashoumon wrapped around his mouth.

It made Atsushi flush at the rather intimate position he had put them into. With Akutagawa’s body pressing against his own so Atsushi was flat against the wall, and Rashoumon prohibiting him to speak, his ears went red at the possibility of someone seeing them in such a compromising position.

Rashoumon retreated, Akutagawa putting a finger to his lips as Atsushi in that moment, with his brain on the fritz, asked the dumbest thing that could come to mind. “Is this about the Zebra?”

The look that he received only had Atsushi start laughing, causing the Degenerate to press his hand against his mouth as a very familiar voice could be heard passing by the alleyway.

“James, we’re going to be late! Making that stop for your slushee made us behind schedule. We’re already thirty-two seconds late.” That was without a doubt the strict and stern voice of Kunikida that at one point probably made multiple poor math students he used to teach piss in their seats.

“Well, to be fair, I wasn’t just going to refuse the nice lady who bumped into me after she knocked my other slushee out of my hand. She was insistent, and wanted to buy me another one.” And that was James. Just James. That’s all that was needed to know based on the wreck of a history professor.

“She was hitting on you.” Kunikida supplied.

“Yes, She was nice - wait - She was what?” Came James’ confused voice.

“I know. I’m just as surprised as you are.” Kunikida responded curtly, clearly busy with his overzealous schedule.

The two familiar and passing voices slipped away past the entrance of the alley, now too far to be able to hear coherent words, leaving behind two teenagers who were still entangled with each other against a wall, their shoulders shaking.

Atsushi lost himself into laughing against Akutagawa’s shoulder the other joining lightly in the contagious hilarity of the situation as they then slipped down to the ground, just the both of them together, laughing, on a filthy ground without a care in the world.

It was for that very reason when Atsushi found a stuffed animal zebra on his desk the next morning - no name of the sender but he already knew who sent it - he named it ‘slushee’.

@tradrishanally a fic for your cute fic war as well!

#bungou stray dogs #anime #bsd #atsushi nakajima #bsd atsushi #bsd akutagawa #akutagawa ryuunosuke #kunikida doppo #doppo kunikida #bsd kunikida #fan fic #oc #oc belongs to whyis

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btsjfans · 6 years

Text

Our Song (pt 6)

Summary: School playboy, and jock Jungkook is the last person you’d expect to be a soulful musician, but everybody has their secrets

Jungkook x Reader (fluff, angst, smut next chapter)

a/n: ahhh thank you for all the requests, getting requests and feedback about my stories literally makes my life I love you all so freaking much ALSO SORRY IT TAKES ME LIKE 50 YEARS TO POST OMFG

masterlist

part 1 2 3 4 5

“Y/n L/n IT IS 2:17AM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA--” Your mother screams, pacing in the kitchen, while your dad scowls beside her. You sit at the dinner table, numbly listening to their tirade. You’re still half asleep, and tired from earlier.

You’d fallen asleep at Jungkook’s earlier that night, and woken up when he’d rolled over in his sleep, and flopped on top of you. In the moment it was funny, until you read the clock that glowed “2:10am” in ominous white lettering.

“JUNGKOOK I-AGDHGDJ” You’d screamed, pushing him off and springing from the bed. He sat up, hair sticking up in all directions as you hopped around his room, desperately tugging your jeans on.

“What?” His voice was deep and grumbly as he rubbed his eyes and tried to process the situation. His eyes finally settled on the clock, and he gasped and dashed out the door, “MEET ME IN THE CAR!!!” He screamed, scrambling for the keys.

The two of you hit 70 in a 25, managing to get you home by 2:15, saving about 8 minutes on your usual drive time. You kissed him one more time before getting out of the car, trying to savor one last good moment before you met your bitter end. “I love you forever Y/n,” He smiles, stress evident in his tense body.

“I love you forever too Jungkook.” You sighed, facing the house, having accepted your impending doom. The second the door had closed behind you, the lights came on and the screaming began.

By 2:45 your parents decided they had enough and sent you swiftly to bed, but not before taking your phone and sentencing you to 2 weeks of being grounded.

You lied in bed, emotionally drained as you stared at the ceiling. But even then, you couldn’t help but smile. You really did love him.

From: My Mans :)

Saturday, 2:30am

Y/n??

Y/n is everything okay???

Im so sorry

I really am I didnt mean for time to get away from us like that

Ughhhhhh Y/n please dont be mad

Please dont be mad

Ok uhhhh text me tomorrow ig. I love you

Sunday, 10:11am

Y/n really Im getting worried

Pls tell me this is a prank? AHAHAh im laughing

2:45pm

I showed you my dick pls reply

Y/N

4:41pm

goddddd

Y/n i really love youuuuu

Knock knock

Whos there?

NOT YOU APPARENTLY SJHDGSJFAHKSAHJ

6:18pm

ok so

I guess youre mad?

Annnnd idk what I did so I cant say sorry

BUT if you tell me what I did wrong I can apologize

sooooo

uGAUKHSFGHJ Y/N

See 216 More Messages?

You grin scrolling through your messages. It was 7:45am on a monday, and you’d just gotten your phone back. You’d spent the weekend without electronics, and with plenty of housework. You still had two weeks of house arrest, but you would get to see your friends at school, and keep your phone, so things were already looking up. Your parents didn’t know you lost your v-card, so they didn’t really have anything against Jungkook except for him keeping you out too late.

To: My Mans :)

7:48- Come get meeeeee :P

Within 2 minutes of sending that text Jungkook replies, making you laugh.

From: My Mans :)

7:56- Oh my god are you kidding me I text you all day every day all weekend and this is all I get back? No heartfelt message? Am I just a rockin bod and a cool car to you? Damn, you thotties really be cold

7:57- Omw

“What the fuuuuck,” Jungkook whines pulling you in by the hips and kissing you, pressing you against him.

“Sorry, my parents took my phone.” You grin, ruffling his hair and getting in the car.

“God I thought I was bad in bed or something, you really did a number on my insecurity this weekend,” He grins, taking the car out of park.

Walking through school felt different now. You felt dirty and exposed. You felt like everybody knew what you did that weekend. Walking down the halls hand in hand with Jungkook, you usually got some stares, but now it felt like all eyes were on you. Jungkook seemed fine, unbothered even. As he should of course, and as you should too. You just couldn’t shake that unsettled feeling though.

Eventually that feeling left, and a feeling of pride took its place. You were his girl, the person he decided was worthy enough to be his first. Telling your friends really gassed you up.

“Y/N YOU WHAT?!” Lisa was screaming. You guys were between classes and you couldn’t really think of a good time to tell them, so you figured now was as good as any. “You got dicked down? Like all the way down?!” Lisa whispered, eyes wide. “Yeah! Do you guys hate me?” You grin nervously.

“No! Just don’t ditch us for booty calls,” Jisoo grins and nudges you. The three of you laugh while you give them details as you walk to your next class. You’re caught up in the story before somebody runs into you, jolting you from your thoughts. You look back in annoyance to see who the perpetrator was. Mark Tuan just hurries off, ignoring you. “Hey, ignore him. You’re Jeon Jungkook’s squeeze now, we have more important things to think about.” Jisoo laughs, grabbing your arm and tugging you down the hallway.

Mark

Jungkook was still a part of our group I guess. Bam and Taehyung jumped on the chance to talk to him again after things had been tense the last few weeks. Jungkook texted them and asked if we could all hang after lacrosse, so of course that meant I had to wait after school til 5 for them.

Roaming the empty halls I scroll through instagram, trying to occupy my headspace. I really had been enjoying my guy time recently, but I can’t lie, I do miss my time with Y/n. After school hot chocolate and homework had become a fixture in my life, like she had been. It felt like there was a big empty hole where she used to be, in my house and in my head.

“Mr. Tuan,” Mr. Atkinson’s voice rips me from my thoughts.

“Yes sir?” I turn, pocketing my phone.

“Wanna take a walk?” Atkinson approaches, not really giving me a choice. We both walk in silence for a minute or so, our footsteps echoing down the halls. “Have you been alright recently? You and Y/n don’t talk anymore, and you’ve fallen in with a..lesser crowd.” His voice is light, but I can hear the more serious tone beneath.

“Yeah, people just..grow apart.” I shrug, shoving my hands in my pockets.

“Yeah but you and y/n didn’t. Or at least she didn’t. I know there’s more. Now, I don’t expect you wanting to talk to your washed up teacher about your personal life, but you should talk to her. Or someone.” He’s right. I sigh, nodding.

“What do I say?” My voice is quiet, ashamed.

“It never hurts to start with sorry.”

You lay on your bed, scrolling through your phone on a break from homework. Your break had already taken 2 hours, oops. Suddenly a picture of Mark doing a double chin fills up your home screen while your phone buzzes, signaling a call from your old friend. It had been a hot minute since you’d gotten a call from him; it had been a hot minute since you’d gotten any kind of formality from him in general.

“Hello?” You slowly hit the green button.

“I’m sorry Y/n. Can we talk?”

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7wanderingpaws · 6 years

Text

11. Epilogue

Genre: magic / soulmate AU

Pairing: Jackson x reader

Word count: 2.8K

Song: Shura - Whats It Gonna Be? (<3)

Synopsis: You are more than happy in relationship with Jackson Wang, the hard-working and successful fencer representing Hong Kong. So what happens when you visit a local witch wanting to know more about your future as a couple? Because you always knew he was the right one for you. Even in another life. But would he really be the one?

*** 1. // 2. // 3. // 4. // 5. // 6. // 7-1. // 7-2. // 8. // 9. // 10. // 11.

(( Wowzers! Its the final chapter already. Im quite speechless to be honest, because I grew fond of this story ever since the basic idea popped into my head and would bug me until I wrote the the first 2-3 chapters in one sitting. It was one of the most wonderful writing experiences. THANK YOU, endlessly THANK YOU for liking, commenting, reblogging and following. I wish I could throw my emotions to show you how much it means to me. I hope this last part will be enjoyable. Im a cheesy girl. On my blog things end well :) dont blame me. Let me know what your thoughts!! ))

Special thanks to MARAH <3

- - - Epilogue - - -

San Jose, California, 2020

“Are you sure we are doing the right thing?” you asked anxiously as you drove up the uneven road on a very familiar street. “I mean, last time I was here when we were together, it didn’t end up well.”

“Yes, but that was when I wasn’t my absolute, upmost happiest on the entire planet,” answered Jackson, taking your hand in his to kiss your knuckles. His other hand was on the steering wheel, driving the rented car up the road.

“What if somebody will see us?” you muttered, growing smaller and smaller on the passenger seat. “We don’t need any more new rumours.”

Jackson chuckled as he let go of your hand, so he could push the car into reverse to park it in front of the house. “Babe, c’mon. We both know we couldn’t care less about those things. Besides, you work in Team Wang. You can do any possible step against those suckers if you wish so. I will always be by your side supporting you.” He was looking behind the seat to ensure he filled up the entire place. He turned around and winked at you. “I’m actually excited. Yay. Let’s go.”

You exited the car and hand in hand walked to the doors, ringing the doorbell.

“You only support me cause you would go down the drain with me as well if I wouldn’t do the necessary steps,” you commented again, not letting him go just yet.

“Sure, honey, whatever you say,” he laughed and pressed his lips to your temple.

You smiled, both of you knowing well you were just joking.

When the doors opened, a familiar face of the old man appeared, his kind expression already inviting you inside. “Welcome! Please, do come in. Henrietta is will be finished with her customer-”

“Yes, we will wait, thank you,” you answered before he could finish, knowing the entire sentences all too well.

Jackson gave you an amused look as you took a seat in the living room. The house was filled with wonderful, mouth-watering smell that was coming from the kitchen. The old man was just taking out a big stack of cookies out of the oven.

Gosh. No matter how many times you were here and relived everything again and again, nothing, and I repeat, nothing could come even close to this beautiful, harmonious smell that you were sniffing in that house. It was generous and maybe full of love; that’s why it was so good.

Jackson took a hold of your hand, his big eyes curiously scanning the surrounding. “What if she will say we are not meant to be and have to break up right in this very moment?” he quipped, his eyebrows just under his hairline. He looked so funny when he was trying to be fake-serious.

You. Loved. Him.

“Well, then we break up. I mean,” you shrugged, not bothered, “you have to listen to what the witch says, right?”

He was trying to maintain the serious face, but his facial features loosened up and one of the most breathtaking smiles spread across his face, his eyes wrinkly, his (cute) teeth out, his cheek-bones up. What a sight...

He leaned in to kiss you when the doors behind you opened.

“Oh, I apologise for letting you wait, my clients are-” Henrietta stopped mid-sentence when you and Jackson stood up at her sudden entrance. You had Jackson’s hand tightly gripped in yours just above your tummy. You smiled. “Oh my goodness,” said Henrietta, lacing her fingers and bringing them to her chest. “What a beautiful couple are you! Please, do come in, do come in,” she said excitedly as she let you into her office.

Yes, the windows were still tinted, the room still harmonious and well-organised. It didn’t change one bit.

You took a seat opposite her chair, Jackson once again looking around with innocence.

Henrietta sighed as she sat down behind the long table, her cards neatly prepared. “I know you.”

“We know,” you smiled shyly, breaking Jackson’s hand in your tight grip.

“I see you made it.” Henrietta’s face was pure bliss. Her eyes couldn’t stop looking at you and Jackson as both of you exchanged glances.

You lowered your head, having a hard time getting such affectionate glances from the witch.

“Yes, we did make it,” Jackson said, his face also smiley and proud. “It wasn’t the easiest of the roads but here we are.”

Henrietta was nodding many times. “And why did you come all the way here? There is not much I can help you with.”

“What do you mean?” you asked, recovering from the heat in your cheeks. “We would like to hear your opinion now, in this current life, when Jackson is an artists, I’m an accountant, no fencing, no doctors, no ... nothing like before.”

“And that is exactly how it should be, my dear,” Henrietta replied, your heart jumping quickly. “Everything is as it should be now. There is no reason for you to worry whatsoever. You both evaporate happiness and satisfaction.”

You both nodded.

“So how was Y/N like when she came here for the first time?” asked Jackson out of nowhere, a cheeky glint in his eyes.

Your eyes widened, giving his bicep a slap. “Excuse you.”

“She was just as beautiful as she was now,” Henrietta replied without any obstacles. “But do you mean in this life or the previous one?”

“This life. I want to know how she was like when she found out,” said Jackson honestly.

“She was freaking out a lot. Oh, you are missing that wonderful friend of yours, Sofia-”

“It’s Sara,” you and Jackson said at the same time.

“-Sara, yes, and she was like a lion, fighting to know what is the truth. I can understand that Y/N was frustrated with what was happening. There aren’t many situations like yours. Not everyone on this planet has their soulmate.”

“Soulmate?” you frowned. “That sounds a little bit crazy.”

“But that’s what you two are,” answered Henrietta, her voice suddenly deep and mysterious. “There are very few soulmates in this world and you seemed to find each other in both worlds. As soon as one of you would see the other, you would know there is some connection. Don’t be overexcited, not everyone has those feelings. Many people are with someone just for the sake of being in a relationship, to not feel alone. Your relationship is on a universe-level. It was always written in the stars. Either way, you were supposed to know each other and I’m truly happy I was able to experience this rare phenomenon.”

Well, that sounded like some museum-like text for a dinosaur. Processing her words was one thing. Living and actually making her words come true was a completely different thing.

The two of you exchanged looks.

She was right.

The stars aligned.

You clicked.

Seoul, South Korea, 2026

“I swear I always get lost in this country,” you mumbled to yourself angrily. “No matter how many times, always, always, always,” you sighed desperately. So what if you were already above thirty. Thirty-year-old people get lost TOO!!!

Except, it was 2am, the metro was closed, the buses were not in service anymore, there were barely any people and even if there were, you spoke as much Korean as you did Icelandic. Nothing. Zero. How did they say hi again? Annyogfkfosyf??? Yes, that could be.

Looking around, you tried to find a friendly face that could be of any help. Isu metro station was located on a massive crossroads surrounded by tall, modern office buildings. But there was not a single person who was kind enough to help a stranger out.

You tried English. “Excuse me!”

Nope, they wouldn’t even look your way. Of course. This was not an English speaking country.

Before you could really start getting scared, you tried to stop a taxi. But the road being a big main road, there was almost zero chance they would pay any attention to you.

The reason why you were freaking out was simple: your phone was dead. No battery, no life, no hope, no reason to fight in this life anymore. If the phone gave up, the humanity could easily do so as well. This way, you couldn’t call Jackson.

“I’m gonna make both of us die,” you muttered to yourself unhappily, when another person completely ignored you.

“Excuse me, can you please help-”

“Hello, sorry, do you know how can-”

“Annyofabsfkjas,” you tried, exasperated, your tongue twisting and breaking. How on Earth did they say hi in Korean? Where is Jackson when you needed him? Why was your phone dead? Why were you even here?

People ignored you. And even walking a little bit couldn’t help, the city was too big and you were too small. “Shit.” Wiping a tear away, you tried your phone once again but, of course, it wasn’t working. “SHIT.”

You ran a little bit, your heels clicking on the pavement. Reaching out your hand, a taxi must stop for you. There was no way one damn taxi wouldn’t stop for you.

A little cry escaped your lips. “Please.”

Just then, there was a sports car speeding up on the road and it abruptly stopped right in front of you, its brakes and wheels screeching loudly, making you flinch. This was it. This was when they would steal you and murder you for organs.

The door for passenger seat opened. “Get in.”

The voice was strict, but there was no hesitation as you swiftly got into the car.

“Are you crazy?” Jackson was angry, his eyes sending daggers your way. His left hand was on the steering wheel as his whole body was turned towards you. The door was closing itself.

“I’m sorry, you know I always get lost and my phone was dead-”

“You are pregnant, Y/N,” he snapped, worry written all over his manly face. “It’s dangerous for you to be out at this time all by yourself.”

You sighed, already tired. “But you found me,” you said, gently reaching out for his hand. “You found me. Just like you always do.”

Jackson’s features softened, his anger dissipating slowly but surely. He gave out a deep sigh. “I was so worried about you.”

“I was worried about myself too, thanks,” you laughed, touching his cheek.

He smiled and turned to fasten his seatbelt again.

“Jack?”

“Hmm?”

“I’m hungry.”

He gave out a breathy laugh. “Of course you are. It’s freaking 2am. Your pregnant-self loves to eat at this convenient time.”

“Well, lucky me that we are in Korea where the deliveries are non-stop working,” you winked at him and looked out the window.

He grabbed your thigh with a lustful squeeze but his eyes were trained on the road. “Damn, and how much I love that you are here with me.”

And by the time you arrived at your apartment that you owned in Seoul, the black-bean noodles have arrived, warm and fresh. You devoured it all, and still managed to swallow sour pickles.

“Your appetite,” commented Jackson tiredly. He wouldn’t go to bed without you. No, never. He was over that part of his job. He was now his own boss, working on many projects, attending many galas with you by his side as his wife of 6 years.

Oh. The wedding!

Your wedding.

The wedding of you and Jackson.

The time when Jackson married you.

The time when you married Jackson.

That day...

... was one of the most watched weddings of the century.

So what if William took Kate? And Harry took Meghan? Nick took Priyanka?

Jackson Wang took you. And many watched. Many supported.

A superstar is taking a normal, ordinary person that is not part of the entertainment industry. You were just a normal person, breathing oxygen like others, shining in different directions that the other artists. You had a soulmate. You had Jackson.

This is how you became one of the biggest searches on Google and Naver. Who were you? What were you? They wanted to know everything.

Everybody wanted to know the woman who was smiling brightly as she was walking down the aisle, the only person she could ever imagine her future with waiting on the other side having a squirtle look and still looking so handsome, so lovable, so kind, so Jackson.

The other special thing was, that you didn’t have a massive wedding. Yes, Jackson wanted to have half of the world present to see his happiness, but he still listened to you. It made you uncomfortable to be in front of so many people. You wanted close family and great friends surrounding you.

So he did it that way.

And the wedding night was even more special than the entire day filled with flowers, good food, lots of laughing and dancing till the early morning.

Jackson was still spinning with you in your hotel room, dancing to music, both of you tipsy with love for each other.

There was no gentle and slow love-making. There was no wild and crazy sex.

No.

You cuddled up, shared a wonderful, passionate kiss and while you were silently giggling into each other’s mouths, whispering stories from your wedding day, how someone would trip and fall, how some people interacted, you just kept giggling and smiling, both of your eyes still shiny even in the darkness of the room, you slowly drifted into peaceful sleep, Jackson’s arms around you, your front pressed against his chest as his chin rested on the top of your head.

Both of you had comfy pyjamas on, make-up removed and teeth washed.

You decided you would not have children until you reached a certain age. During that time, you would enjoy your freedom. You followed Jackson almost everywhere, you would sneak out, be silly, you would make decisions together that would benefit for both of you.

Of course, there were fights. What kind of relationship didn’t have fights? They could be cruel at times, but neither of you ever meant it. There was safety around both of you.

You were guaranteed for each other...

...

... until this guarantee was broken years later when your water broke. Thankfully, you were in Hong Kong where you always planned to give birth to your children. Jackson made sure he didn’t have any plans that included travelling too far from Hong Kong as he wanted to be present in the hospital.

And now, it was three years since your guarantee for each other was made more flexible and had to cover also twins that were born. Plus-

“Jackson,” you said as you came out of the toilet. Jackson was lying on the floor, one twin - Sofia (after Jackson’s mother) - on top of his chest, the other twin - William (after nobody in particular) - was at his feet, trying to take his sock off.

He looked up at you questioningly trying to hold Sofia so she wouldn’t hurt herself. “What is it, baby?”

“It’s happening again,” you muttered, trying to look nonchalant around kids.

“Daddy was talking to meeee!” wailed Sofia again. “He calls ME BABY!!!”

William was always the quieter one. Definitely your genes.

“Happening what?” he asked and swiftly grabbed giggling Sofia, putting her down so he could stand up and walk over to you.

As you were standing on the doorstep to the bathroom, he supported his hand on the wall next to your head as he leaned in.

“I’m pregnant.”

He raised his eyebrows at you, not that surprised. After all, you were making these “mistakes” in the bed very willingly and happily. Slowly, one corner of his mouth lifted, his dad face long gone and his flirty face in the game. “Are you now?”

You shot a quick glance to the kids who were oblivious to you. You nodded as your eyes dropped to his lips. He licked them.

“You are freaking awesome,” he mumbled and kissed you, pushing his tongue right in, startling you.

You tried to suppress your moan, wrapping your arms around his neck. “You are responsible for it, though,” you breathed, capturing his lips again.

He grumbled, pushing you inside the bathroom, making you walk backwards. “We will be right with you, don’t be mean to each other!” he shouted towards the twins before slamming the bathroom door shut as you giggled loudly. He quietened you right away with his passionate lips, his hands all over your body as he pressed you to the wall. “I always wanted three kids.”

“Well, what if it’s another pair of kids?” you asked.

“Then I say it’s a happy life too,” he laughed pressing his forehead to yours. “I love you. I love you. I love you.”

You squeezed your eyes shut and gave him a chaste kiss before you mumbled with your lips and tip of your nose pressed to his cheek. “And I love you.”

<3 <3 <3

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pinksweatergettingbetter · 7 years

Text

warning, the following has mainly snarky (and possibly furious) opinions on Spirit of Justice. Reader discretion is advised.

Trucy, you don’t need to take sides. There’s one side. The truth. And both Apollo and Phoenix are on that side.

They’re not at the same bench but they’re on the same team. It’s gonna be ok.

“I’m sorry too, little lady! this is all my fault..”

Oh so trucy gets an apology, but not Apollo? cool cool whatever

Trucy, if Phoenix and Apollo become bitter enemies over a property dispute then they weren’t really all that close to begin with.

Dhurke: invalides trucy’s feelings while simultaneously spouting more of his Manly Man shit

“one minute we’re trading blows, and the next, we’re having drinks together”

well if that’s his mentality i can see why he thinks its ok do be an utter fuckwad to everyone

“We’re simple creatures at heart! Hah-hahahaha!”

yes... men are so simple at heart... they’re just a bunch of neanderthals... thanks Dhurke, truly you are the way to the future.

To be honest, I am glad that this is a civil case. When I first saw the publicity I was sure they’d made Phoenix a prosecutor for no reason and I was furious.

I’m not super glad at the way things turned out but at least the bullshit counter didn’t go into the red and explode.

Phew. I’m actually sighing in relief here. Maybe I can pretend what follows is all a friendly game or something.

Aww; poor Judgey’s confused :(

...they seriously don’t need to have a falling out to be on the opposite side of a courtroom. Lawyers face each other all the time.

They don’t have to hate each other, they just have to keep things professional, otherwise they’d cause a conflict of interest. Like... it’s not ideal but tbh it’s more a danger to their clients than each other.

Y’know, I’m gonna dare to be optimistic here; as much as I hate this storyline and most people in it, this is actually an interesting and character-developing scenario.

Apollo has to face off against his mentor, the guy who... well I’d say Kristoph taught him all his tricks, but Phoenix was a sort of moral guiding force, I guess. Apollo standing up and holding his own against a superior is a legitimate way to show that he’s come into his own. Plus, since it’s not framed in a negative light (or at least, it shouldn’t be) it’s more impactful than phoenix being straight up evil since that would make it easy to take him down. This is a contest between two people who simply happen to be on opposite sides of the chess board. Again, it’s a pretty legit way to show Apollo’s growth.

...that said, I just wish it wasn’t happening after zero character build up and a heaping serving of bullshit. :T

Oh well. At least they got something right.

it is pretty hilarious how much they’re trying to up the drama though. it’s not that deep, guys

I guess Atishon just doesn’t have legs

[snerk] his shitty speeches are actually kinda funny. ...if a little cliché.

...he’s standing... but I'm still not ruling out that he’s legless...

Tbh, even though Atishon is clearly lying, the fact that Datz basically threatened the orb out of Buff does make this kind of in their favour.

...Apollo, don’t overcomplicate the case. All you have to do is prove that it’s not the crystal and you can have it.

Reasons Apollo would make a good rebel: He doesn’t blab his rebelness all over the place for no reason.

SEXY PAN UP SHOT FOR MS. SKYE

nice ankles, ms skye.

“Ema..?”

“Use some manners, we’re in court”

thats not the way you acted the last time you were called as his witness :/

whoa seriously whats with the sudden crazy 180 for Ema? Yeah, she’s grumpy, but suddenly she’s acting like Apollo’s some rude little shit off the street. Why is she upset that he’s going up against Phoenix? Why does he need to apologize? JUST BEING ON OPPOSITE ENDS OF THE COUTROOM DOESN’T MAKE YOU ENEMIES.

or did the SOJ team forget the lessons we learned in the trilo–– oh who am i kidding they’ve never even laid eyes on those.

“You’ll never get the job done with that attitude. Take it from someone who’s been there” Been where???? Been where, Ema?????? what the fuck are you talking about what is going on

haha the fey statue and the urn were ‘stolen’, huh? yeah. stolen from a better game.

pfft. So Buff’s some Kaitou Kid type, huh?

y’know ive been neglecting to mention it but have you noticed how much they skimp on animation compared to DD? DD had like 20 tiny animated cutscenes, and SOJ has one lame one at the beginning of each case to set it up. I can’t believe they even slashed the animation budget.

has anyone noticed how unfocused 3D phoenix looks. he looks like he’s just. staring out into space.

i love they don’t use gendered pronouns to refer to Buff’s kid. Remember the last time they did that? Mr. Andrews......

“I was shocked to see the urn that came from Kurain in Kurain”

anyway quit referencing actually good games, SOJ. Back to the shame corner for you.

oh COME ON. How do you steal a fucking wall relief?!

and he really couldn’t just get a fucking permit? what the fuck is this

“but good intentions are no get-out-of-jail-free-card”

they are a sentence-lightening card, though! either way, this is one of the things i like most about AA. No matter how good your intentions were you still dont get away with cold-blooded murder.

OR KIDNAPPING, AURA. HAVE FUN IN JAIL YOU SHITTY EXCUSE FOR LESBIAN REPRESENTATION.

every single theft of an artifact can be attributed to Dr. Buff. every single one.

alright, so we’re back to that whole ‘missing object report’. Thing is, unless there really IS a Crystal of Ami Fey, this wouldn’t work out. Atishon has to provide evidence that he owned the item, or that it existed in the first place. If this crystal turns out to be made up I’m gonna pitch a fuckin fit.

Don’t disappoint me, SOJ.

“Wimperson”

ah, SOJ, with all the comedic genius of a third-grader.

...to be fair i could say the same about Larry but i like larry and AA1. and it also plays into his phrase-thingy!

seriously. gimme pics of the crystal or we’re gonna have some serious problems.

“So how do you know this item is the thing he’s looking for”

“he said so”

THATS. NOT EVIDENCE.

oh judge, your oldness never ceases to be to be enjoyable

(that wasn’t sarcasm btw i love that dumb running gag)

seeing phoenix scream from the opposite side of the table is very enjoyable. just because i love seeing phoenix scream but also like having that scream not mean something bad for my case.

i get to have my cake and eat it too! <3

um i dont think you can put dashes in email addresses.

“Don’t tell me!”

“Oh, but I will anyway.”

I love Apollo so, so much.

so you looked far enough into this that you tried to hack his computer but you’ll accept “its mine cause i said so” as concrete proof of something??

“Maybe the recipient of the email was a dog lover!”

he might be on the other side with the kid gloves off but phoenix is still Phoenix “a baseball also has stitches” Wright.

fuck. he walks to the bench. he cant not have legs.

...but maybe........

what the fuck

Atishon has the same birthday as my dad

DISGUSTING

oh my god, seeing phoenix /sweating/ on the other side is even more surreal

i also love that everyones making ‘politicians are gross’ jokes willynilly but they all forget that they’re Criminal Defence Lawyers

“This is... Quite... a thing... you’ve said”

I'm wheezing

this is turning out to be way funnier than i expected

please SOJ I'm having fun don’t stop me now

i mean he has a point. if Atishon leant the item to Bluff to study that still means that Atishon owned it in the first place.

HOWEVER, WHERE THE FUCK IS THE PROOF OF THE ORIGINAL ITEM IN ANY WAY RESEMBLING WHAT WE’VE GOT HERE.

its so weird to see phoenix on the wrong side of the bench that i keep getting his voice wrong when i read him out loud. i keep making him sound deep and authoritative instead of... well, how he usually sounds.

“Well, grandchildren ARE meant to be spoiled... I mean, that’s what grandfathers are for!”

judgeyyyyyyyyy

im crying

ema: can i fuck off now

“lets get more info on the crystal”

FINALLY. thank you, athena.

NO, NOT ITS HISTORY, DAMNIT

PROVE THAT IT EXISTS AND YOU OWNED IT.

“back in the old country”

...england..?

pft i though his testimony said “The Hilarious History” instead of illustrious history and i was so ready

“he protected the spirit mediums, a minority back then, from the rest of the locals”

well thats a big fat lie because

A) Kurain village is build on mediums

B) no way the Fey clan would allow a male ruler

we could reaaaaaaaallly use some photo evidence, Atishon.

“One Ives Shineto”

ok what the FUCK. where the hell are all the women?! HEY. SOJ TEAM. DID YOU EVEN GLANCE AT THE oh of course you didnt fuck meeeeeeeeee

also whats that pun

FFFF PHOENIX YA LIL SHIT

“The transformation the mediums underwent when channeling spirits frightened the locals”

i am glad to know changing your entire bone structure is as scary looking as it sounds. of course, i doubt people would be frightened for too long when they were talking to deceased loved ones.

i must say they did do a good job writing Atishon’s lines.

“The Kurain channeling technique is known to have originated from Kooraheen, and Ami was said to travel there to train”

No, Ami invented the technique, and according to your backstory, she lived there first. Can you even keep your own facts straight?

I mean, apart from all this being bullshit and i hate it.

i legit cant believe it took THAT LONG for phoenix to point out the fact that the handover agreement was signed under duress.

that'd be like, the first thing i pointed out.

...ah, there it is. I knew this couldn't stay a happy little civil case for long. Here comes the murder.

Also, really Phoenix? You didn’t bring up the fact that he might have been killed any earlier too?

Now that theyre bringing up the pile of books, I realize how ridiculous it is that there were so many of them on the ground. Pulling out one book might dislodge one or two next to it, but not the entire shelf. For the books to have fallen like that, they would have needed to have been shoved from the other side, or for the shelf to have listed forwards. neither of those things are possible. and nobody noticed this?!

i mean the only reason i didnt think about it was because i knew this was murder from the start.

Man, Phoenix, with all your “with respect for the dead” talk, it sure did take you a while to bring up the fact that you knew he was murdered and the police should probably be getting on that right now.

>edit: Actually I just realized how despicable that is; keeping the fact that this was murder secret just to use it later on as a quick bargaining chip in your civil case.

Hey capcom? You can screw up the series all you like but FUCK you for making Phoenix a skeezy piece of shit on par with the likes of von Karma. Because you know who else withholds information that sensitive for such a petty reason? MANFRED VON KARMA.

Fuck you, capcom, fuck you, fuck you, FUCK you.

“Did you forget who you were up against, Mr. Justice?”

All I do is hurl baseless accusations!!

wow the second this turned into murder i just got tired of this case. Also, Phoenix, you better back your butt back to your seat. Being a murder case, this requires a prosecutor... something that you are not.

theres AN AUTOPSY REPORT. WHY ISNT THIS A SEPARATE TRIAL. THIS SHOULD BE A SEPARATE TRIAL; THIS SHOULD BE BEING... TRIAL-ED IN ANOTHER COURTROOM. you can reference it, and use it as evidence, BUT YOU CAN’T JUST COMBINE THEM.

Damnit, Capcom, I TOLD YOU NOT TO DISAPPOINT ME.

BUT YA JUST COULDN’T HELP IT, COULD YOU.

...Datz is in the gallery... But he was just in jai–– fuck it whatever

ok now that this is a murder trial Atishon’s non-answers aren’t funny anymore, theyre ANNOYING. I WANT THIS SHIT TO BE OVER AS FAST AS POSSIBLE. YAP ME A CONTRADICTION OR I’LL CRAM YOUR BELOVED PLAQUE UP YOUR POLITICALLY INEPT ASS.

“Try me, o lord of plebs”

its been a long time since any meme-y type person has called someone else a pleb... please try to keep up, SOJ.

i love that phoenix, at the end of each statement, politely states “get the fuck on with it, asshat”

why the fuck did he

fall asleep what

OOO THE JUDGE YELL

AW YEA

“What did I ever do to deserve this?”

you existed in the first place, Apollo. I’m sorry.

No.............

I do not like that Phoenix used the phrase, “Witness, I think it’s time for you to come clean.”

You know who uses phrases like that.

Assholes.

“You should know I always come fully prepared, Justice!”

( buy it, buy it, buy it, buy it––)

...Right, so Phoenix isn’t a prosecutor but he sure as hell has been doing a lot of prosecutorial things. Calling all the witnesses, explaining the case, etc.

Oh and he and and Atishon still didn’t tell anybody that Buff was most likely murdered right off the bat so ffffffuck you capcom

Fuck you, Datz. Stop laughing and fucking focus on the fact that you’ve been accused of murder and it’s kinda tough on your ol’ pal Apoll– oh wait silly me i forgot none of you give a rats ass about him. All you do is laugh and eat and sit around waiting for Sadmad to come home.

“Better brace yourself, son”

Hey guess what Dad warranty expires if you haven’t made or tried to make contact in 20 years so get that word out of your nasty mouth, Dhurke.

“Worried this might make a rift between you two...

...and that you might then leave the agency”

haha

“Hahaha. She has an active imagination”

hahahah

hahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahhAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHA

“...Nothing a little persuasion couldn’t handle.”

Capcom. If it was something douchey. I will tear you in half.

SEXY PAN UP SHOT FOR

robot guy

i remember when i used to be excited for each new case. now I'm just scared what new horrors the next will bring.

hang on why does the drone not have a special sound font? if it didnt disguise the operator’s voice it would be kind of obvious who they were...

HOLY SHIT MISSILES

SO... THE WHOLE “BOMBS IN THE COURTROOM ARE HORRIFIC THING” FROM DD IS JUST FORGOTTEN, HUH??

hang on.

“Capitalist pig; I’ll turn you into pork stroganoff”

is “Sarge” legit Russian, then? That explains the “Komandir” thing. Shit, I have to change my voice.

ok so Sarge is written with an American Sargent phonetic accent, but uses Russian rankings and seems to be communist. What am I missing???

“I guess he does dress like he’s in the military...”

hes a paratrooper!!! why dont you know that? i thought you grew up with him.

“That’s true. Papa didn’t keep our house locked up.”

...the... archeologist... with a house full of priceless treasures... didn’t lock his fucking doors.

hey congrats for trusting the mediums and all but guess what? thats irresponsible as fuck and incredibly stupid for a supposed thief so I'm kinda surprised it took you this long to be discovered/bumped off.

those have got to be nerf bullets cause firing a GUN in court is just fucking ridiculous. like too far for Ace Attorney. Melee weapons, ok. Long range firearms? No.

...Though... Note to self... Next time, when creating parody prosecutor, you now have legit grounds to just give him a fucking gun........

“Sorry, but I’m afraid lawyers are missile-proof.”

Note to self. Upgrade gag prosecutor to missile launcher.

ooh, i see this drone is in the same vein as the Assassin’s Radio.

“Courtroom warriors don’t use guns or missiles, because evidence is our weapon of choice!”

Ahah! THATS why prosecutors are so violent. They never have any evidence to back up their assertions so they just fuckin ASSAULT people.

i... had a little chuckle at ‘truth bomb’

“What’s with him and Siberia of all places?”

Well context wise it seems he's some kind of... Defected-to-communist American?

Huh. Athena’s powers must be based purely on sound waves then. Interesting.

Anyway, it’s mood matrix time! Hooray!!! I’ve warmed a lot to the Mood Matrix to be honest. I like the glowy lights.

I’m gonna make a guess right now that something was on fire. Cause thats some PTSD shit right there.

pfft the gallery was so on board with their new judge overlord. Also thank goodness this is Ace Attorney and this shit is allowed to fly, cause you’d get your ass handed to you if you tried this in real court, pal.

Um, I wouldn’t dig any deeper if sarge is still in such a state. It’s not... safe. Either that or you best hope that thing’s bottomless magazine has run out. Plus, I love that whoever’s watching over the actual Sarge in the Lobby hasn’t tried to stop them when they noticed them SCREAMING AND PRESSING THE ‘FIRE’ BUTTON REPEATEDLY.

Or they’ve left Sarge unattended and the Dark Age of the law isn't over because it was an omnipresent thing to begin with...

its ok, game. contrary to what you think, you did write Sarge’s backstory in a memorable enough way for me to remember it up until now.

Huh.

HUH.

So... the person involved in writing Ace Attorney Investigations... Has written a sequence in which we must burn evidence to prove a point, huh?

DONT YOU HINT AT ME, GAME

that solemn moment of reflection doesn’t include Phoenix cause he’s over behind his desk bawling his eyes out

“I’LL BE YOUR NEW PAPAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA”

actually Athena’s got a point. Her tragic backstory is much more similar to Sarge’s than Apollo’s. She can properly relate to losing one’s last family member in a horrific way.

S––

Well, considering her age, Cutesie Pan-up shot for Armie.

Apollo’s having serious Robin Newman flashbacks right about now

ahhhhhhhhhh. her mom was Russian. It all makes sense. Tbh just for now, forgetting everything else, this kind of does feel like an old case. I’m at peace... for now.

i guess it’s less of an orb and more of some kind of lantern then. Cause you can’t really burn a crystal

unless its

whitcrystal

hahah

hahahahahahahhaha

so far I'm ranking the cases from best to worst: Magical, This part of Revolution, Foreign, Rite and Storyteller.

sgsjgsjsjjs athena’s INTENSE LOOK OF HUNGER as Apollo burns the orb

“I wanna see me some sweet mama goddess”

damn shit thats her face

thats uh

ohhhh

oh i see. I was wondering what the ‘great power’ the orb could bestow upon people was, and now I realize that since it depicts her face, if someone knows her name, they could channel her. And since she's basically an actual goddess that would bestow some serious power.

not bad, not bad at all.

i know i highly dislike Kooraheen but i legit feel kinda blessed

“The issue is crystal clear”

*seals phoenix’s fate with a fucking pun*

dont keep saying “did we just win” before the verdict is handed down, you'll jinx it.

oh hey, blackmail. its like a perfect reenactment of Capcom getting Phoenix to sign onto this sequel.

Phoenix: According to the legend, once the founder returned... She would bestow spiritual power onto the person who solved the riddle.

Apollo: ...Y-youre kidding, right?!

[Apollo looks flummoxed, the gallery whispers. We cut back to Phoenix’s smirk, and then––”

???: Phoenix... Just give it up.

[Phoenix screams in shock. We pan back to Apollo......... Who now has D-Cup breasts and a very familiar face.]

/...i wish.

legit tho i cant believe he's trying to pull this. I'm cackling

this is the lawyeriest lawyer ploy ive ever seen

“What’s gotten into him?”

bad writing.

sdsgsdhjafhgj EVEN THE JUDGE IS CALLING BULLSHIT IM CRYI

(sigh) i guess we’re really gonna have to finish this, aren’t we. oh well. on we go! let’s forge ahead!

y’know i just remembered that Pearl appeared like, once in this. Was that her only part? I guess she just existed to remind us that Kurain village used to have girls in it.

noooooooo fuuuuuuuuuuck

i really hope the contradiction doesn’t require pressing because i aint sitting thru this fuck’s antics again.

it has rounded corners.

and its huge.

phoenix and apollo’s objections are too similar, i can never tell who’s screaming.

“There haven't been many murders there, I take it”

well........ not “many”

i love that Atishon pledges to banish murdeer from Kurain village and Apollo is all “yea good luck with that” like Murder is inevitable, even in a tiny village like Kurain.

Thats. kinda terrifying.

...though considering the way Kurain is...

i cant tell phoenix and apollo’s voices apart (sigh)

i never know whose objecting

Phoenix: my client couldn't have viewed the murder directly from where he said he was, but the fact remains that he had inside knowledge of said crime!

...phoenix, you’re just trying to help apollo along, right? you didnt seriously believe that that sounded positive to your case, instead of Shady as Fuck, right??

“You talk big, Mr. Justice, but do you have what it takes?”

he just finished telling Phoenix he was about to put what Phoenix taught him into practice. Phoenix should be swallowing a lump in his throat and trying not to cry of pride right now.

“that suitcase could be a weapon anyone could use!”

yeah... yeah! even someone in a wheelchair!! oh wait wrong case.

..........but we still have someone in a wheelchair

a 3D crimscene view

haven't seen that shit since AAAJ

‘THAT SHITSTAIN ON THE BOOK PROVES HE WAS HAVIN THE COFFEE SQUIRTS, CASE CLOSED BOYS”

sorry i just felt like being vulgar

“and there it is, the final excuse cornered killers are so fond of”

holy shit

i love apollo

phoenix shut up please, just shut up

let it end

let me rest

oh wait

ah here we go.

“hes a bright young politician with a future ahead of him, its in our nations best interests to avoid burdening him with the taint of scandal”

hey, uh Enshiro

ill never forgive you for putting those words in Phoenix Wright’s mouth

“Lawyer! Do something! Or a bad thing will happen to ‘her’!”

no? nobody else heard that incredibly obvious threat? nobodys gonna

“whats he talking about? well, i can ponder that later. for now...”

FUCK

YOU

DO YOU HAVE A BRAIN THAT IS CONNECTED TO YOUR FUCKING EARS?!

HOW THICK HEADED DO YOU HAVE TO FFUCKING BE TO NOT RECOGNIZE A GODDAMN THREAT WHEN YOU HEAR ONE YOU

YOU

YOU PUTRID PICKLED RED PEPPER?!?!??!?!

Athena: oh yeah i also heard Atishon making blatant threats at Phoenix but meh, phoenix made me pinky swear not to tell.

I’m not shitting a lung in fury, I’m just getting rid of an organ i dont need through the nearest available passage. I’m perfectly calm and not cursing this game, Eshiro and his entire team to the pits of their own stupid made up hell.

“I had no idea. This must’ve been excruciating for him.”

i wanted to write a sarcastic jingle but i had trouble coming up with rhymes, so the blunt bottom line is:

when you’re not good at writing, simply steal clever and impactful plots from previous iterations so that you’ll seem clever and exciting

i mean

nobody even remembers Farewell my Turnabout anymore, right????

what the fuck is his deal with being king

OH SHUT UP DURKE

GO FUCK YOURSELF

think youre gonna steal Franziska and Mia’s thunder????????????? no

you aren’t a fucking fraction of an inch as cool as either of them.

“he’s saved my neck so many times”

when

“where there’s a will, there’s a way”

how about where theres a whip, theres a better game?

“wait................... maybe we can summon the founder now that we can see her face??”

aww. you got there in the end, didnt you apollo.

...that doesnt automatically spare Maya’s life. Pearl is also a spirit medium. And i’m fairly certain there are other–– oh wait SOJ retconned that neverMIND

anyway, Atishon could still bump Maya off and then force Pearl to channel Mamma Kooraheen

OH MY GOD HE JUST BROUGHT UP PEARL

WHY PEOPLE ARE SO STUPID

WIMPERSON BROUGHT UP PEARL

THE IDIOT VILLAIN BROUGHT UP THE FLAW IN YOUR BRILLIANT PLAN

GSEGFISGUILSGIULSGUI;SRHG

“pearl wouldn't help you if anything happened to maya”

um. you morons think he’d politely ask her to help??? he's already kidnapped someone and threatened their death?? he and his founder aren't above torture or blackmail????????????

you FUCKING MORONS

why even bother resigning? just do what you did before and let him go to jail.

...this’d better just be a lead up to his breakdown animation

YOU COCKSUCKING FUCKSTAINS JUST END IT ALREADY

END IT END IT END IT EDN TI EDNEI HDFI HSRLG SIHFLIHIR HF;LIVHLSIRHIGHISRHOVGLORIH’WI’HSGOI’WSGZIHSI

“if only you'd been smart enough to kill the girl, too...”

wow

...what the fuck

well that was... interesting.

i cant even celebrate Phoenix congratulating Apollo, I'm just so tired

there are like 85 sarcastic remarks i could make but I'm just so exhausted

yay we got the orb

dootdootdoot dootdootdoot

even the judge doesnt want to have anything more to do with this.

im right there with ya judgey

“All I can say is, thats my boy!”

NO, YOU DONT GET TO CLAIM PARENTAL PRIDE OF THIS KID

HES NOT YOUR BOY

YOU BARELY RAISED HIM

GO HOME AND DO YOUR SHITTY COUP

“Still, its kinda nice to be appreciated”

if only you actually were, Apollo

yeah, thought so... ill bet they dont even channel her. cop out.

“tsk, thats no fun” indeed, trucy

i love how nobodys like “OK WHERE’S MAYA??? IS SHE OK???”

its fine her whereabouts are unknown and the last info on her was just that her life was in danger

pfffff

its alright, Armie has a place at the WAO

"i knew if i admitted i could walk, id have to leave the house”

uh honey newsflash: you can leave the house in a wheelchair too. I'm pretty sure your dad would let you stay inside anyway

christ how fucking corny can you get. I CAN WALK AGAIN. why dont we just have Tiny Tim in here throwing away his crutch and dancing a fucking jig

see, there we are. Maya’s still in danger you fuck wits.

and part one is over, folks! i am pooped. and furious.

till next time.

#sulking over SOJ #im so.... i #this fucking game good christ this fucking game

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griffinkathryn95 · 4 years

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Getting Your Ex Boyfriend Back Using The Law Of Attraction Incredible Diy Ideas

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What Can I Say To My Ex To Get Her Back

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Win Your Ex Back After Breakup

#Getting Your Ex Boyfriend Back Using The Law Of Attraction Incredible Diy Ideas #Can You Get Your Ex

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viralhottopics · 8 years

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The Rules Of Texting (Explained By Guys)

A special thank you to Brittany and Kristi for the article inspiration, Anna for panel recruitment and research assistance, and to the panel of experts for contributing.

As single millennials, the Should I text him first? inevitably pops up in my friend group chats from time to time, followed by thorough deliberation. This time, I went straight to the source for the answers to what, if anything, is appealing about the chase when it comes to texting, what the game is about, and how to play. Five guys, ages 20 30, opened up about what goes through their minds before they hit send.

Our panel of eligible male millennials: (Names have been changed.) David, 20 Braden, 20 Cameron, 23 Ben, 27 Nate, 30

1. Are there rules to texting?

Lets cut to the chase pun intended. Four out of five of the guys said yes, there are rules to texting. According to Cameron, 23, the golden rules are to mind your grammar and abide by three strikes youre out if hes not responding: Always use complete sentences and never send more than three unanswered texts.

Nate, 30, says the golden rule is No emojis if you are over the age of 16.

Ben, 27, thinks it goes beyond whether or not you send those monkey emojis: I definitely think there are unwritten rules to texting. A lot of these rules are generated by society and pop culture, and dictate how we converse with one another. I think these rules are also reflective of the relationship you have with someone. The frequency and type of text definitely differs between friends, work associates, girlfriends/boyfriends, best friends, crushes, siblings, parents, etc.

Ultimately, I think there is a general set of baseline rules that most people follow like being polite, funny, respectful and then the rest just falls into personal expectations.

2. What is appealing about someone being hard to get?

There was a clear divide here. Two out of three of the 20 23 year olds said there is nothing appealing about someone being hard to get. David, 20, clarifies, It makes them seem conceited and uninterested. Nate, 30, weighs in with the younger crowd on this one, stating that nothing is appealing about a girl who is hard to get. He advocates the straight to the point approach: I am always one who is aggressive and goes after what I want. You know pretty quickly if someone is into you or if you are into them. Whether its via text, at a bar or Steak n Shake, hard to get is a thing of the past. I have noticed over past 3-4 years even females have been more aggressive in pursuit.

On the other side, Braden, 20, says, It makes them seem desirable; if lots of people want someone, then that person probably has something good about them.

Ben, 27, sheds more light on the appeal: [Its] the old adage of nothing easy is worthwhile. I think everyone can agree that the more time and effort you put into someone, the more interested you are. But being hard to get is definitely a game and

I think it totally depends on the type of person you are. Each individual has a different threshold of hard to get that they are willing to tolerate. When youre texting someone that you like and they are hard to get, its nauseating, exciting, and thrilling, waiting for someone to respond the fact that its new and unknown is exciting. The anticipation and re-reading of texts can drive you mad but its that pain and agony that makes it so much better when they respond.

3. How often is too often for a girl to text just to say hey?

According to Braden, 20, more than once a day is too often, while Cameron, 23, says texting just to say hey is always fine. Nate, 30, agrees that the text conversation should be open-ended to keep the conversation flowing.

Ben, 27, wants a more creative conversation starter. If you are actively pursuing someone, you better come up with something better than hey or you will lose their interest, he cautions. But dont underestimate the guys ability to play hard to get: However, if I know someone is interested in me, and maybe Im playing hard to get, just saying hey after a lull in conversation can let them know that Im still interested, but still give me the control.

4. Is it a turnoff if a girl is always the one to text you first?

We have a consensus here everyone answered no. Nate, 30, explains, Its 2016; Chivalry isnt dead, but her texting first is kind of a turn-on, actually. It shows interest. Ben agrees, adding that, It shows that she knows what she wants. If Im not interested, its not a turn-off, but it does become annoying if they continually

text you first when you dont show interest.

5. Are there weekend texts and weekday texts?

No surprises here Weekday texts are more conversational, and are meant to serve as distractions while at work. They are also sober texts (usually). Weekend texts tend to get more flirtatious, and the senders are more likely to have a drink in the other hand (you dont say).

Ben, 27, cautions the tipsy texters: Once you start drinking, you start texting less with your brain and more with your emotions, which can lead to a disaster the drunker that you get.

When asked the difference between a weekday text and a weekend text, Nate, 30, says that there isnt one unless it is after midnight and the bars are closing. I feel compelled here to remind everyone of the Jersey Shore wisdom of Nothing good happens after 2:00 A.M. (unless youre at Steak n Shake and Nate will be there with chivalry and cheese fries).

6. Is there a reason or strategy behind your texting habits?

Maybe the bad texter isnt always a myth. Some guys generally dont like texting as a whole. David, 20, dislikes communicating through texts because of the inability to convey emotions properly through words. Nate, 30, would also opt out: I am more of a phone caller, [it] shows more intimacy.

Unfortunately, the fear that the guys inbox is full of conversations with other girls may be a valid concern. That is, at least, if youre talking to Braden, 20: I treat it like a game where I try to talk to as many people as possible at the same time.

Ben, 27, is our breath of fresh air. Im not one for games, he says, and the older I get, the less and less I play them. But I do think it is important to not come off as desperate or clingy when first meeting someone, because you dont want to spook them. When can you expect a non-strategized text from him? After 2 3 dates, I usually stop worrying about the time or frequency of my texts as strategic, because I feel that I have a read on them and whether or not we like each other.

7. What is your favorite text to get from a girl?

Ill let the guys speak for themselves here.

David: I dislike all texts equally.

Braden: hey (:

Nate: pizza and hockey game?

Ben: I think that depends on the girl; for example, I loved getting hey there stranger from my first serious girlfriend who I took to prom. The words didnt necessarily mean anything, but between us it was an inside joke or something we always said to each other. So I think the best/favorite text to get from a girl is where they reference an inside joke; it shows they care without actually saying the words, and its unique to your relationship.

Cameron: Anything that means they were thinking of me (e.g. miss you/ something reminded them of me) and compliments.

8. When was the last time you ghosted a girl and why?

For questioning readers, Ill save you the Google search: Ghosting is when someone youre dating or talking to or seeing (#Dating in 2016 problems) ends the relationship by ending all communication without explanation or warning.

Interestingly, the 20 23 year olds werent as familiar with the term. David, however, appears well-versed in it. When asked when the last time he ghosted a girl was, he replied, This week, I didn’t want to talk to her. Fair enough.

However, sometimes ghosting is the simple solution to an online dating match gone bad. Ben, 27, last ghosted a girl after a first [Tinder] date. She had a lot of baggage, he explains, and brought up that she recently broke up with a boyfriend she had been dating for several years She was not ready to date and that was what I was looking for.

Nate last ghosted a girl last year: She said she was a Cubs fan.

9. Have you ever waited a day or longer to respond to a text? If yes, why?

Most of the panelists said yes, by accident or yes, to not come off as eager. Nate, however, knows better than to wait too long to reply to your text: You wont find yourself anywhere but the doghouse if you dont text back within a few hours.

The takeaway? To summarize the findings, here is the most important graph. Send the text. Keep it thoughtful If you were thinking about him, let him know. Mind your autocorrect, dont spam him, and be your witty self even if that calls for emojis (personal opinion). Happy texting.