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IF YOU LOVE ME, LET ME KNOW | jack hughes.
chapter six:
➴ warnings: none!!
➴ word count: 4.1k
➴ author’s note: thought it’d be great to give u guys jack’s pov please don’t kill me—or jack. also wanna say thank you to each one of you who take the time to read this series and give me your thoughts abt it. i cannot thank you enough. pls be patient with jacky, he’s just a boy :p nice reading yall!!!
sophiamontenegro
liked by billboard, trevorzegras, charlieputh and 1,972,022 others.
sophiamontenegro ‘rip to my feelings’ is out now 🪄 i want to start this by saying thank you to everyone who helped me make this dream of mine come true.
all of the songs here mean the world to me, and i truly hope they help to heal some of you, like they healed me.
please, don’t let anyone make you feel like you don’t deserve good things. you do, all of us do.
thank you grace, thank you john, thank you hannah, thank you to all of you. 🤍
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charlieputh 💙
morgan.grace I love you so much I might turn into a puddle. Soph, you’re one of the strongest, sweetest people I’ve ever met and I’m so grateful to call you my best friend. I watched you put so much effort and energy into this, and i am proud. Happy RTMF day 🪦
billboard I am crying, you’re crying, all of us are crying.
lovssoph i knew this was going to hurt but DAMN Girl what the hell
laurenahser it’s been hours and I’m still crying because of this goddamn music video. And i HATE charlie puth
jesy.iowu @laurenahser NO GIRL BC SAME?? it’s so SAD
sophsecret Harris Dickinson if i fucking catch you on the streets you’re DONE
paula.west off topic but do you guys think any of these songs were written for jack hughes…
chiquitalinda @paula.west honestly no,, soph said this album has been in the making for one year and apparently they just broke up last week?
_quinnhughes Congrats, Soph 👍
sophiamontenegro @_quinnhughes thank u, quinny
ilovehockey @sophiamontenegro @_quinnhughes CHAT WHAT DOES THIS MEAN???
“HUGHES, the hell was wrong with you today?” Keefe’s voice sounded harsh and angry.
Even though there were two Hughes in the team, everyone knew who the coach was referring to.
“It’s just not a good day,” Jack mumbled, removing his uniform and not bothering to look up.
The locker room was dead silent, so everyone heard Keefe’s scoff. “Not a good day? More like not a good week,” he stepped closer, hands on his hips. “You’ve been off for the entire week and let me tell you something, son, we’re not making it to the Finals with you playing like you did tonight.”
Jack wanted to talk back so bad but deep down he knew Coach was right. He had been playing like shit, ever since that night at your house.
You. Just thinking about you made Jack feel like straight up shit. Something that never happened before.
He is handsome, he has thousands of fans. People paid to watch him play, people wore his jersey proudly. He could have any girl he wanted but still. Everything changed at that dinner, six months ago, when he saw you performing up close for the second time.
At that moment, he was mesmerized by you. Back then, he thought he was just horny and in the need of a good fuck but looking back now he knows that it wasn’t just that. It was something bigger than himself, yet something he couldn’t name.
“I get it, Coach,” Jack muttered, putting on his suit.
“I hope you do, kid, otherwise, you can just say goodbye to your NHL career and the Stanley Cup.” Coach barked before getting out of the locker room.
Ignoring the stares he was getting, Jack moved on autopilot, like he’d been doing the entire week, shoving his things inside his duffel bag and frowning.
“Cap, wanna go out and grab some drinks? I wanna get wasted!” Someone, Jack didn’t care to know who, shouted, talking to Nico.
“‘Can’t today, man,” Nico answered, duffel bag already on his shoulder. “I’m going to a concert tonight.”
That caught Jack’s attention, pulling him back from his thoughts.
“Concert?” He asked, looking at how everyone went quiet and stared at Nico. “Whose concert?”
“Well, you see…” Nico stuttered and somehow, even if he hadn’t said anything, Jack knew exactly whose concert it was. “Just. A singer?”
“Yeah, no shit is a singer, Hischier, I thought we went to concerts to watch electricians doing their shit,” Jack bited back, the frown just bigger now. “Whose concert, Cap?” He said the word like he was mocking Nico and even though he wanted to take that back, he didn’t. Nico was an amazing person and it wasn’t his fault you didn’t want anything to do with Jack anymore.
“Hum, well—”
“For fuck’s sake, man, just spit it out,” Bastian said, rolling his eyes. “We’re going to Soph’s concert. Launching party, whatever.”
“We?” Jack’s eyes doubled in size. “Who else is going?”
“She invited the entire team,” Mercer answered, and Jack could swear he was one step away from passing out. “And Zegras.”
“Yeah, the entire team minus you!” Zegras shouted, clearly not reading the room. None of the players said anything about your and Jack’s situationship-break-up but Trevor made it clear he was happy with the situation. “Zegras is out in the hunt again, baby, ‘gonna give Soph the real D!”
Jack didn’t even notice he moved until he felt a heavy hand on his chest, looking down and realising it was Nico’s hand and he was now toe to toe with Trevor.
“Watch the shit you say, Zegras. I’m not fucking with you.” Jack spoke slowly, eyes not leaving Zegras’.
“Like you’re going to do anything, Hughes. You lost the prize, now it’s time for her to know what a real man is.”
Jack stepped foward again, only to be stopped by Nico’s hand.
“She’s not a fucking prize and this is not a fucking game, asshole,” Jack said through his teeth, ready to punch Trevor right there and now.
“How old are you two?” Hischier hissed, separating Jack and Trevor like a dad would do. “Trevor, shut the fuck up and don’t talk about Soph like that. And you,” he looked and Zegras before looking at Jack again. “You can’t and you won’t do shit. You and Sophia aren’t a thing anymore and there’s no one to blame but yourself. Suck it up, Hughes.”
Jack wanted to punch all of them in their fucking faces. It wasn’t his fault! He wasn’t the one who published the article and he wasn’t the one who sent that fucking picture of him and Ava leaving that party.
So what if she was his ex? That was in the past. He didn’t even remember her name, for fuck’s sake. She meant nothing to him while you—
“Whatever,” Trevor shrugged, before leaving the room.
“Hischier,” Jack called before Nico left. He turned back and stared at Jack, eyes tired. Jack felt bad for acting like that and giving even more trouble to Nico but Trevor was a fucking assface. “I need to go to that concert.”
“Unless you have an invitation or a ticket, I can’t take you there, man.” He bit his lips. “I’m sorry, but I won’t do that to Soph.”
Jack hated how Nico was clearly choosing sides and he also hated how he said her name and how everyone seemed very comfortable with calling you Soph but he pretended that he didn’t care.
“I’m not going to talk to her, I just…” his lips formed a straight line. He wasn’t sure of what he wanted exactly, but he needed to see you. Ever since your album had been released, he had been playing it nonstop, trying to memorize every breath you took, every line you sang, every beat you produced. He just needed to see you. “I want to see her.”
“Man, you know I can’t do that. Grace will kill me.”
“I’ll deal with her, Hischier, I swear,” in that moment, Jack was glad everyone else had already left, otherwise it’d be humiliating.
Although he noticed, with shock, that he wouldn’t mind begging in front of people if he got the chance to see you.
Nico ran his hands through his hair, muttering something in German before nodding with his head once.
“Fine, but I swear to God that if you upset Grace or Soph or worse, both,” he got closer to Jack’s body, looking like he did when he was on the ice. Terrifying. “I’ll personally make sure you won’t do that ever again.”
Gulping, Jack nodded once, before following Nico.
— ♡
THE line outside the venue was gigantic, making the men inside the van yell and whistle.
Much to Jack’s dismay, all of the Devils who were your fans had been invited to your concert— except him, of course. Which he thought was really, really shitty, by the way— and they were all excited, wearing shirts with your face on it and holding banners with your name.
Jack had to wear an all black outfit, with a cap hiding his hair and sunglasses. He thought he looked ridiculous but unfortunately, Nico was right: you couldn’t see him. He knew that if you did you’d be upset and the last thing he wanted was to ruin your night and concert. So yeah, hiding himself it is.
They left the van, entering the building from the back entrance, not wanting to cause a commotion out there in the front. Jack had been told this was just a small concert but the place looked packed with people.
“Okay, so,” Nico started, wearing his Captain belt once again. “Grace will be here in a second, and she will give us the VIP necklaces so we can go to our sets,” he turned around, facing Jack. “I honestly don’t know what to do with you. Grace will probably kick you out but at least I did my part.”
Jack just nodded, already thinking of millions excuses he could say to Grace so she would say yes.
True to Nico’s words, Grace showed up not even a minute later, wearing a red, tight dress and heavy makeup. She looked beautiful.
“Hi, fellas!” She walked in, smiling brightly. “Nice seeing you all, Soph will be happy with you being here and— what the fuck are doing here?” Her smile was gone, and now the only thing left was a scowl on her face.
Jack smiled awkwardly.
“Grace, listen, he asked me to bring him here because he wanted to see Soph—” Nico started, only to be interrupted by Grace’s harsh words.
“I don’t give a single fuck, Nico, what the hell!” She was starting to leash out on Hischier so Jack knew he had to say something.
“She’s not going to see me, I promise,” he replied.
Grace laughed. “Of course she isn’t going to see you because you’re going to leave!”
“Grace, come on,” Jack muttered, ready to beg to another person just to see you. Fucking shit. “I can sit in the back, there’s like a thousand people outside. She won’t see me.”
“Baby,” everyone looked at Nico as he approached Grace. Jack frowned. Since when were they together? “I told him that if he did anything bad I’d punch the shit out of him myself. He will behave.”
“I’m not a dog—”
“Fine,” Grace sighed, loudly, already looking like she regretted saying yes. “Nico I swear that if Sophia sees him or if someone takes any pictures of him here, I’ll snatch your dick out of your body.”
All of the men there made an ouch sound, faces amused and terrified. Nico only nodded, after giving Jack the scariest look ever.
Grace gave them their badges and asked for another one for Jack. Everyone there was running around and shouting things, probably all worried about everything being perfect, and Jack found himself smiling because you were surrounded by people who cared about you and your work.
Turns out that sitting in the back really meant sitting in the back, because Grace gave Jack a really shitty seat that despite being small as fuck, had a really good view of the stage, even if it’d be impossible for you to spot him.
Jack’s hands were sweaty and his heart was racing in his chest. The place was packed with all different types of people, from children to adults, and some grandparents here and there.
He was proud. He remembered how excited you were for this album, for this little concert, and watching how you’ve managed to ace all of that, made him smile under his hand.
The rest of his teammates were sitting in the VIP section, really close to the stage, and hell if Hughes didn’t envy them. But he knew this was for the best.
Thirty minutes after he sat down, the lights dimmed and only the stage was on. The screams were so fucking loud and if Jack wasn’t already used to people screaming his ears off during games, he’d probably have a fit right there.
“Ladies and gentlemen, Sophia Montenegro.”
Nothing could ever prepared Jack for the sight of you on that stage. It’d been two weeks since you last saw each other and the last time was awful, his heart hurting every time he remembered the sight of you crying and remembering he was the reason why.
But watching as you stood on top of some kind of platform, wearing a black, glittery body suit, with heels and black, see through socks. Your hair was styled in a way that drove him absolutely crazy, and now he wasn’t so sure that coming to this concert was a good idea after all.
“One year, ten thousand bad moments
But it was dressed up in heated emotion
And I tried to look for the best in the worst
But like, fuck me, that caused a commotion.”
Your voice was perfect, of course it was. Somehow, you knew how to sing live even better than the recorded songs, and your stage presence was out of this world. Jack looked at you as you moved around, singing and dancing and waving at people and interacting with the band, not knowing what to do with the weight on his chest.
He was happy to see you, he really was, happier than he’d felt in this entire week, but fuck if he wasn’t hurt. Watching you from afar was even worse than not watching you at all, because he was reminded again and again that he lost you.
Even if he still thinks it wasn’t exactly his fault.
The crowd was loud, people were dancing here and there and Jack could swear the girl in front of him was crying.
“Oh, you're so vicious
Love me, then pretend you didn't
Crush my heart and wreck my image
Why you gotta be so, so, so
Oh, you're so vicious”
You were sitting in the middle of the stage, microphone in your right hand, singing with your whole heart. Anyone could see how alive you felt whenever you sang and honestly, it was beautiful to witness.
The song continued, and every second Jack was taken aback by how beautiful you were. So fucking beautiful. The most beautiful woman he had ever seen, inside and out, full of life and happiness and joy.
He only noticed that the song had ended when he heard people cheering louder than they were before, and he started to pay attention again.
There you stood, in the middle of the stage, trying to even your breath. You were smiling so hard, cheek to cheek, eyes shining so bright even Jack in his shitty ass seat could see it.
“Hi, guys,” you were out of breath but your voice still sounded like honey to Hughes’ ears, and he had missed the sweetness. So. Much. “Oh my god, there’s so many of you in here, what the hell.”
People laughed, and Jack found himself smiling.
“Hi, I’m Sophia,” you said, shyly, like the people there hadn’t paid to see you. “Thank you for being here, guys. It’s been a while since I last saw you guys face to face. Last time was in Coachella, back in April, right?”
People shouted many things, you smiled.
“So a week ago I released my fifth album, rip to my feelings,” more cheering. “I know the title is corny but I couldn’t find better wording. This album, and I’ve said this countless times, means the world to me,”
“Fuck Harris Dickinson!” Someone shouted and everyone started laughing, including you.
“Yeah, yeah,” you agreed. “I hope you like the show. I’ve also heard that we have some special guests tonight…”
Jack’s heart stopped. For some idiotic reason, he thought you’d say his name. Until he reminded himself that you and him were no longer a thing and you didn’t even know he was there.
“Please, please, please, make some noise for my favorite hockey team, the New Jersey Devils!”
The camera focused on the fifteen men sitting on the VIP section, who got out of their seats and started shouting, while showing off their merch, making the other people cheer too.
Jack knew he shouldn’t, but he felt jealous all the same. He should be there, cheering for you and kissing you in front of all of them. Maybe punching Zegras in the face while he was at it too.
“Thank you for coming, guys,” you smiled again, before you started singing the next song.
Jack was mesmerised with you for the next hour and a half. How you danced, how you sang, how you twirled around, how you looked so fucking gorgeous in that tight outfit. How your eyes shined, how your body was perfect, and how he wanted nothing more than you.
The concert went well, like everyone knew it would, you making yourself comfortable, and at home: talking with your fans, taking pictures with them, handing the mic to some of them, who sang awfully in Jack’s humble opinion. Even if the majority of the songs were sad and soul crushing, you made sure people enjoyed themselves.
You were a true sight.
“Now, this is going to be the last song,” some sad oooh’s were heard and you smiled, nodding with your head. “I know, I know, I’m sad too but you all have to go home and these people here,” you pointed at the band behind you. “Also have to go home. But,” you raised your finger, moving your body until you were sitting on the edge of the stage. Some of your fans shouted. “I have one more song for you. This one isn’t in the album because I wrote this recently, but I still want to show it to you guys.”
More cheers, more shouts, more people crying.
“This one’s called Bad for Business and will be available on all streaming platforms by midnight.” Jack watched as you smiled, making him raise and eyebrow. He didn’t know about this one.
“He's good for my heart but he's bad for business
Tears me apart when he grants my wishes
All of my friends think I've gone crazy
But they don't know me like my baby
We look good in photographs
I like the way you like to laugh at dirty jokes
I know they'll always land
Used to get work on time
But now you're taking up my nights
Never been so glad to be so tired
Ooh, I'm mad for you
It's sad but true and I know it
Ahh, you're on my mind
You stole my life and it's showin’…”
Jack couldn’t take his eyes off the stage, eating up every word. He knew this song was about him. It was as clear as day, and maybe he was just being cocky but he didn’t care. It meant that he still had a chance.
He's good (good), it's bad (bad)
The best I've ever had (best I've ever had)
And he's so nice, it's sad (it's sad)
He ruined all my plans
And he just makes me so crazy
I know everyone sees
That he'll be the death of me
He still had a chance. He could still try because it was clear: you were still in love with him. Why else would you sing this? Why else would you write something like this?
He got up, he had seen enough. He left the venue with his head low, trying to walk without being noticed. He knew exactly what he had to do, and even if it sucked, it was the right thing.
—- ♡
“I really hope there is a reason why you’re calling me in the middle of the night, Jack,” Quinn sounded tired but. He always did. “A good one, that is,”
“I need some advice,” Jack looked at his brother through the screen, noticing the eye bags and the tired eyes. Why the hell Quinn always looked like he had been hit by a train was unknown.
Quinn just hummed, signaling for him to continue speaking.
“It’s Soph.”
“Did something happen?”
Jack cringed. Maybe they did need to start paying attention to what happened online. “Yeah, well, someone took a picture of me leaving the Halloween party with that girl named Ava who’s apparently one of my exes and posted it online, making it look like we hooked up or whatever. Then, they talked shit about Soph and Soph kind of broke up with me after saying she was in love with me and basically calling it a mistake.”
Quinn stared at the camera for a good minute, and just when Jack was starting to think he’d fallen back asleep, he moved, caressing his face with his hand.
“The hell is going on in New Jersey.”
“That’s all you have to say?” Jack scoffed. “I didn’t call you for nothing. If I wanted whatever the hell this is I would’ve called Luke.”
“I mean, what did you expect to happen? One day your whore days would catch up on you. Everyone knew this.”
“Why does everyone keep calling me a whore? Is this how women feel?” Jack frowned.
“They call you that because you had a new girl every month. Every time you had a gala you’d take a new girl with you and of course people would talk about that.”
“Okay but I wasn’t dating any of them!” Jack raised his arms, forgetting that he was still holding his phone and dropping it. Picking it up, he continued. “So what if I had a new woman every month? The issue here is Sophia not wanting to be with me anymore!”
“I think that, before wanting to be with her, you have to know if you want a relationship at all,” Quinn said, calmly. “You’ve never had a girlfriend before, a serious one that is. A relationship is a commitment, especially when you’re dating someone as famous as Sophia.”
“I know that she’s famous, I don’t care about that—”
“It’s not about her being famous, jackass, it’s about people forgetting that she is more than that. She is more than the Sophia who sings and dances, she’s a person. That’s literally common sense.”
“I know that too,” Jack mumbled.
“Soph’s been through a lot with that son of a bitch who’s not even worth mentioning. I don’t know much, you probably know about it better than me, but what I know is enough to make me want to punch him with my stick.”
“Yeah,” Jack agreed. “I hate that fucking asshole. He cheated on her, lied, manipulated her and had the audacity to break up with her.”
“So, knowing all of that, how do you think she felt when she saw that picture?” Quinn asked, eyebrow arched. “The guy she’s in love with, holding hands with his ex.”
“I didn’t fuck her!” He raised his voice, tired of everyone saying the same. “I just took her home and went back to my place.”
“Yeah, but does Soph know that?”
Jack frowned. “Of course she does. I’ve told her multiple times that I was only seeing her. And Ava was drunk, I wouldn’t have done anything with her even if I wanted to.”
“Yes because it’s very credible that the guy who used to date a new girl every month now suddenly only dates a single girl. Jack, sometimes I feel like you just don’t think.”
“If I wanted someone to call me dumb—”
“You would’ve called Luke, I know. But right now, that’s what you need to hear,” Quinn sighed. “Look, I know it’s hard for you to understand but put yourself in her shoes. Just think.”
“Everyone keep saying this is my fault but I don’t see how I am the person in the wrong here. I didn’t publish the article, I didn’t fuck Ava—”
Quinn sighed loudly again, interrupting Jack and staring at the screen for a minute, again.
“What?”
“Sometimes I ask myself if we were raised by the same woman,” he shrugged. “Just imagine if Ma knew all of this. She’d probably yell at you.”
“Get to the point, Quinn,” Jack rolled his eyes.
“Look. I’ll try to make it simple,” he started. “Sophia is in love with you. She fell in love with you despite knowing that you have a long history of dating. But, she’s also hurt. And you made it all worse when you said the things I know you probably said.”
“I didn’t say anything that bad…”
“Oh, quit it, Jack. I know you,” Quinn smiled. “You probably made her cry too. That’s the drill. Anyways, you have to ask yourself how do you feel about Soph—”
“I love her.”
They both stayed quiet for at least five minutes. Quinn just staring at the screen like he was reading a newspaper article and Jack staring back at him, looking like he was about to explode.
He hadn’t stopped to think about what he truly felt for you. He knew he liked you, adored even, but he never thought of naming the things he felt whenever he thought about you.
But it was as clear as day. He loved you, he was in love with you.
“Well, then I think my job here is done.” Quinn finally said, breaking the silence.
“What?” Jack almost shouted. “What do you mean? You have to help me get her back!”
“I don’t have time for that and honestly neither do you,” he stated and, well, he was right. They were in the middle of the season, and that was their job. Jack needed to get a grip. “If I were you, though, I’d start by apologising and telling her that you didn’t have sex with Ava or anyone else for that matter.”
“Okay,” Jack breathed. “And then?”
“Figure it out yourself. You’re a big boy.”
Jack groaned, leaning back on the couch. “Fuuuck. This is so fucking shitty. I love her, and she loves me, why can’t we just be together?”
“You will, after you fix this mess.” Quinn yawned and nodded at you. “I’m gonna go back to sleep. You should too. You’ve been playing like shit lately.”
“Fuck you. Bye.”
“Bye.”
He hung up, throwing his phone on the pillow next to him.
How the hell was he going to fix this?
#jack hughes#jack hughes x you#jack hughes x oc#jack hughes x reader#jack hughes fic#jack hughes smut#jack hughes x singer!fmc#jack hughes x singer!reader#IYLMLMK
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Kingdom has frankly made me feel crazy. I've seen the movie three times. Noa gives both "important" items to Mae. He doesn't choose between Soona and Mae when literally asked. He gives a bullshit "we were born together" answer (what does that mean, bro?) which literally sounds like he thinks of her as a sister. (Which checks out, bc that's the vibe they actually had lbr) He carries her. Rescues her on horseback. Bonds w/her through the whole damn movie. And all their tension? Not to mention Owen and Freya being the literal faces of the movie and all the promo. I just need to know if they have written the single most unintentional enemies to lovers story or if its all intentional and we aren't crazy.
Let me let you in on a little secret that might shed some light on what is going on, here.
Shhh... don't tell anyone. I don't think they could handle it!
The Planet of the Apes Franchise has had many, many examples of human-ape hookups and pairings before in the comics, and hints of this can be found on the big screen (Taylor and Zira kissing, the almost-was ape-human hybrid child).
Some examples of ape-human pairings in the franchise have been:
Malaguena (human woman) and the male chimp Grimaldi from "Terror on the Planet of the Apes"
Tonus, a human-hating gorilla, fell in love with a "chimp" named Valia who was really a human woman in disguise named Myndith. It more or less changed his stance on humans "Blood of the Apes" miniseries
Fauna, a blind chimp female fell in love with Pete Burke, a human man in an episode of the Planet of the Apes TV series
Various examples of human-ape hybrids, such as the mud people
Some examples of ape-on-ape mixes also occurred:
Minister Shiva was half chimp, half gorilla (Dark Horse comics)
The Chimerae were descended from gorillas, orangutan and chimp blood (Dark Horse, again)
Lieutenant Mungwort was part chimpanzee, part gorilla
You can find all of this detailed here for reference:
So, yeah, if they were hinting something between Noa and Mae, you can bet it would be on-point for the franchise to do that.
Intentionally.
Because, you know, the Planet of the Apes has this long history of mixing species, both on-screen and off.
I know some claim it's bestiality, or zoophilia, or whatever to ship Noa x Mae, and that's fine. Sing it to the rafters, you do you.
I still stand by the fact that if someone claims this and pays to watch the Planet of the Apes movies in the movie theater they are financially supporting their own claims of bestiality and zoophilia for a franchise that has always promoted ape-human pairings.
For the rest of us, it's just par for the course and a typical ship.
Hope that helps!
#kingdom of the planet of the apes#mae#noa#mae x noa#noamae#kotpota#nomae#planet of the apes#rise of the planet of the apes#monster romance#noa x mae#kotpota noa#kotpota mae#interspecies relationships
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love is in the air.
. . . and maybe that's why mikage reo can view the world with such clouded, pink-hued vision, and why nagi seishiro cannot breathe at all.
series. nagi + reader + reo. no gendered terms, but some implications of m! reader. reader likes boys. bestfriend! nagi. valentines/white day. highschool setting. swearing. humor. fluff & angst.
a/n. repost bc it wasnt showing up in tags T-T i js want a shoujo anime w these two as the MLs...
prev ┊ next ┊ 01 … 02 … 03
⊹ 01 : my dear partner [wc: 4.7k]
TWO YEARS AGO
“…dude. you're scaring all the hoes away.”
nagi watches your lips move, though he barely registers anything you've been saying since he has stopped listening a while ago—which, honestly, comes as no surprise to anyone.
there’s no real reason to be so lethargic at this hour (it's already late noon, plus he surprisingly had a decent amount of sleep the previous night for once), nor the time to think about trivial things, but he can’t help but think about how exactly every single thing stopped being so bothersome like it used to.
he can't quite pinpoint what brought on this gradual change, but if he had to, then it’d probably be three springs ago—when he’d wake up a little earlier than usual to the gentle kiss of the sun through his window and the cherry blossoms were in perfect bloom. around that time is when he’d received his quiet companion choki, he’d finally scored top 1 in the leaderboards after months and months of grinding in his favorite mobile game, and… when you’d first sat next to him in middle school.
for as long as he remembers, you were simply just there. an unexpected oddity that has not only forced its way through, but has also wedged firmly into every aspect in his life. and somehow, he’d concluded that maybe some things weren't so bad—that some things weren't such a hassle to him after all.
“move, idiot. at this point you might as well hold my hand.” the snow-haired male barely hears your voice over his wandering thoughts, stumbling from the light shove you give him. he has now become acutely aware of your swinging hand, wary of the close proximity and the faint buzz of static that lingers on his skin. huh. maybe it is better to move away.
still, he’d rather not reposition himself. it’s too much work, he’d like to reason, and it's certainly not because of anything else… maybe. he doesn't really know for sure. what he does know though, is that the space beside him suddenly feels strangely empty.
when he looks at you to see a pout forming on your lips, he can't help but sigh. you're being unreasonable. there's something that's been nagging his curiosity for a while now, and it took him quite a bit to realize what it is.
“seishirooo,” you whined one day, allowing your head to sink against his mattress, taking up nearly the whole space while nagi sits at the corner of the bed. you came over to his place that day to bother him, stating that you needed some comfort because apparently, “no one ever looks at me. i feel so damn invisible.” he shrugged and offered you his controller, challenging you to a 1v1 with him as a distraction.
“…but i look at you all the time?” he replied.
“yeah, but that's different.” and he would've asked you to elaborate more, if not for the fact that you've been horribly vague about it when he does ask, and the perpetually sleepy gamer only has so much patience before he gives up and decides it's something not worth spending his energy on.
besides, you're always emotional like that. this was probably just another one of your fleeting phases.
it's not until he notices you've been longingly gazing at the couples on the campus, quietly seething under your breath that it finally clicks. now, he may not have the greatest understanding when it comes to feelings and all its complexities, but even he can tell you’re reeking with jealousy.
despite being pushed off only seconds ago, nagi shuffles closer again as he falls into step beside you. even if sparks prick his skin, it feels right in this way. “dunno why you ‘need’ hoes when you already have me.”
“just because i'm into guys doesn’t mean that i like you in that way,” you mutter, sending him an odd glance like you thought there’s something wrong with his head for even suggesting that. not knowing how to respond, he settles for staring right back without a word.
“what's with that look? you know what i mean, seishiro.” you continue, averting your gaze from him. what look? he asks internally. “it's just, well, literally everyone is getting into relationships. and i know we're still first years, but… it just feels like i’m missing out, y’know?
“do you really? sounds like a hassle to me,” he shrugs, and it truly does—he never saw the appeal of dumb crushes, of drama nearly every day, of possible unrequited “love,” or of wasting half your time and energy on someone just for it to not mean anything at all in the end. video games sound way more fun, and way less heartbreak inducing.
“you can't say that when you haven’t even experienced it,” you argue, still pouting.
“it’s overrated anyways. being single is better.”
“hah! of course you’d say that, you virgin.”
“you’re one to talk,” nagi boredly quips. “i’m celibate purely by choice, but you on the other hand… if you really think about it, you're basically an incel.”
nearly choking on your spit, you exclaim, “hah?!”
“you don't even really talk to other guys except for me, and on top of that, you're barely approached by anybody,” he explains in a matter-of-fact tone, oblivious to the way his best friend’s confidence waning rapidly by the second the more he speaks.
“yeah? and who’s fault is it, you cockblocker!”
nagi simply sticks a tongue out as you flip him off.
right after that, the two of you ended up breaking into a sprint as you heard the clicking sound of heels walking on the tiles around the corner, not wanting to get caught for skipping classes. well, you ran, and just dragged him by the wrist. he felt the warmth of your fingers even through the thick barrier of his baggy sleeve.
PRESENT
you try not to trip and fall face first as a cold hand guides you through the crowded hallway.
it's embarrassing enough as it is to be rushing through the middle of the corridor and pushing past the bodies of random students like you're a main character or some sort, but even more so when the (apparently) most popular guy of the campus that you’ve (never) seen is walking right in front of you.
and it gets even more humiliating when said popular guy has taken hostage of your wrist, leading you away to a more secluded area. shocked, harsh whispers echo throughout nearly the whole floor, and multiple eyes shoot daggers at the fingers wrapped around the sleeve of your uniform, and you’ve never wanted to bury yourself alive more than this moment.
after rounding a corner into a miraculously empty hallway, you finally skid to a stop, yanking your hand away, ready to pounce at the culprit who made you go through all that unnecessary attention. however, before you can get a word in, the refined male bows his head low in front of you, and you find yourself face-to-face with sleek purple locks.
“i’m sorry, but i have no time for dating. i’m really flattered, though. i hope we can stay friends still.” he hurriedly says, hope gleaming in his matching purple eyes.
…what.
who is he again? and why is he rejecting you?
for some reason, you find the stranger’s gaze too bright that you have to look away; so you do exactly that, tilting your chin downwards instead and letting your hair mask your expression.
after a few beats of silence, he clears his throat. “i'm really sorry, it hurts me to see you look so down… i’m sure we can put this behind us and—”
“nice shoes,” you interrupt, still not raising your head to meet his now confused stare. “i can tell you really love wearing them, judging by the busted, worn out stitches. hey, is it just me or is that prada logo kinda wonky too?”
the male's jaw drops down nearly all the way to the floor.
“pardon me?” he says through gritted teeth, keeping his composure by flashing his usual award-winning smile, albeit a lot more stiffer. “i know i just rejected you, but you don't have to be so hostile…”
when you finally raise your head, your expression can only be described as terribly and solemnly unamused, unimpressed beyond words.
then, you suddenly lean closer, peering closely into his violet irises with thoughtful hum. an unwilling flush of red creeps on the tips of the boy’s ears, his eyes widening comically at the sudden intrusion of space. “you’ll do,” nodding to yourself, you now grab his wrist and pull him away. “come.”
“w-wait, huh? where are we go—”
“you're the one who made me late. let's go!”
reo isn't quite sure why he's the one being dragged away now.
he has only initially planned to gently turn down the person who last confessed to him, whose family just so happened to be related to his father’s business partners—but now he somehow finds himself on a whole date with that person? (the same one who brazenly insulted him by implying his shoes are fake, by the way!)
“i have other plans today, you know…” the heir says, subtly trying to inch away from you.
you tug him back by his sleeve, with twice as much force than he had used on you earlier. “i can imagine, my dear partner.”
“w-what?” reo stutters, and he's cringes at himself for how he's acting at the moment. the usually composed and charming mikage reo, now reduced to a stuttering and blushing mess? how embarrassing.
“normally my best friend would do this with me, but he slept in today.” leave it to seishiro to leave me all alone on the day that actually matters, you irritatedly mutter under your breath. “well, whatever. come on.”
as you and him enter the packed bubble tea shop, the fingers that were wrapped around his sleeve slides down to interlace with reo’s own clammy ones. he realizes this a second too late, and before he has the chance to let go, the clerk by the entrance greets them with an enthusiastic “welcome, lovebirds!”
“huh?!” reo’s jaw slackens, dumbfounded. he’s really starting to hate himself now—it's unbecoming of him, really, but it's hard to process everything when you're so close to him that the scent of your shampoo keeps invading his senses and subsequently messing with his head.
“here’s your special tickets for today. thank you for participating, and happy valentines!” you drag him straight to the back, where the colorful claw machines are set up. reo catches a glimpse of the pink posters set up on the walls of the quaint shop, which reads: couples get free special tickets! today only! …ah. that's why he's here.
“aoi-san… you're gripping too tight,” he says, gritting his teeth together into a forced smile.
“aoi?” you repeat, your grip finally loosening until you let go entirely. “huh… i see. by the way, what's your name again?”
needless to say, the purple-haired male is beyond perplexed. “is this your unique attempt at a joke or something?”
“come on, rich boy. we've held hands and i don’t even know your name!”
“right… which i totally wasn't being forced to do…” he lets out an awkward laugh. sure, some admirers of his tend to get a tad excessive, but they were never able to get far with him, much less forcibly drag him out on a date—and it's not even because they want him to spend his unlimited budget on them and spoil them rotten, but just so they can get… a free special ticket for a claw machine. how did he end up getting in this bizarre situation? more importantly, how does he get out?
you simply shrug. “your fault, rich boy. you should try thinking about anyone other than yourself for once.”
“excuse me?” he narrows his eyes, slightly peeved. he's had enough of your rude attitude; potential business partner or not, he hopes that he never has to interact with you again in the future. “stop calling me that. i have a name, and it's mikage reo.”
the way your eyes widen doesn't go unnoticed by him. “and what did you even mean by that?” he presses defensively.
you plop down on the seat, with reo mirroring you as you insert the rouge ticket decorated with pink hearts into the slot of the claw machine. “well, mikage reo. i’m sure you're aware how aoi’s family is important, right?”
yeah, this person is definitely a weirdo, reo muses. who refers to themselves in third person?
“i heard they had connections everywhere… just like you. it's crucial to maintain a good relationship with someone like that, right?” you conclude—that would explain why reo had taken the time to personally talk to “aoi” one-on-one instead of just flat out rejecting them on the spot.
reo tilts his head to the side. “i’m not following…?”
“mikage.” you emphasize, looking at him straight in the eye before turning your attention back to playing. “i’m saying that the poor kid’s still waiting for an answer. your heartfelt and sincere rejection, to be exact.”
a few seconds of silence pass. well, as silent as it can be with the loud chattering of the crowd and the mechanical whirrs of the claw machine you're currently messing with resounding in the air.
“you mean, you're not…” reo trails off, all color draining from his face. “i’m so, so sorr—”
“aoi’s the one you should apologize to, not me. oh, i got a double! how lucky.” you eagerly grab the prize, the limited edition valentine’s merch exclusive to this boba shop; a plushie collectible that comes with a redeemable code for your favorite video game. you want to collect all of them, but you’re broke as hell and you’re only here due to the free ticket. turning to reo, you shove the second plushie to his chest. “here, this is for you. since you did help me out with getting these.”
“ah, thank you…” reo absentmindedly accepts the small toy, still reeling on how he could make such a careless mistake. “listen, i do apologize—”
“i wonder how'd you even mix us up. is it ‘cause we have the same hair color?” you ask, slightly amused because aside from that, you and aoi look nothing alike. your fingers tap on the surface of the control panel, observing reo’s shame-stricken visage. “or maybe… is it because everyone just looks the same to you?”
at that moment, mikage reo realizes two things: (1) maybe he's more transparent and vulnerable than he thinks, and (2) you're dangerous, and it's better to stay far, far away from you. how could you see right through him so quickly? what if that's something you'll use against him?
he doesn't like to admit it, but it's true—in his perspective, everyone's the same. they're just after him for money and status, and at some point, they've all just become faceless, superficial pawns vying for his attention.
and of course, you’re no exemption.
noticing he’s gone quiet, you continue, “but i guess if my world was as vast as yours, i couldn't possibly keep up with everything either, so i get it. i’m not saying i’m in the same situation as you, but i can kind of relate, i guess. i only keep the ones who's important to me close, and the rest just exist and do whatever. i’m selective, but in that way, at least i can give my all to the ones that really matter.”
reo closes his mouth shut. here you are casually saying that you don't matter to him, and while that isn't a lie in the slightest, he still can't help but feel guilty. maybe it's just the people-pleaser in him, or maybe it’s the way the corners of your lips are slightly quirked up and to form a miniscule, accepting smile, but he wants to reassure you, “still, i’m sure you feel that—”
“i don’t.” you don't mind that he didn't know you, because you didn't even know him either—there’s no reason for you to take it personal. you’d be a hypocrite otherwise. “i really don’t.”
you smile at him. he thinks it's out of understanding, but unbeknownst to him you're actually just entertained by how his inner turmoil is so clearly reflected on his expression. “so don’t worry about it. plus, we’re even now.” you add, gesturing towards the prize.
hopping off the stool, you wave at him as you start to walk away. “...happy valentines. i'll see you around, mikage. maybe. er, probably not.”
“wait!” he hurriedly jumps off the stool as well, clutching the plushie in his hand as he follows after you. “i… let me drive you home.” the words stumble out before he even realizes what he's saying. you're probably just using him, and you're dangerous, and you see right through him, and he should stop wasting his time because his actual valentine's date is probably three seconds away from storming out the restaurant he's booked at—
so why is he doing this?
“drive?” you repeat, because of course he’d have a driver. damn rich people, you think internally. “nuh uh. it's like a ten minute walk, and i’d rather save the environment.”
“then i’ll walk with you.”
“you do realize i’m done dragging you for the day, right?” you quirk a brow up, amused; you could've sworn he was itching to get the hell away half an hour ago. “you're free. you can go home if you want.”
reo smiles, a more genial one this time. “i know.”
“so, you into popular guys now?”
“hell no.”
nagi narrows his eyes at you. “you’re just into reo, then?”
while you expected to be grilled first thing in the morning by random people about your apparent relationship with mikage reo (to which you simply replied, “i don’t know who that is, sorry,” and proceeded to run away), you didn't expect to be interrogated by your apathetic best friend as well.
usually, nagi prefers to be completely silent during the 1st period (and actually all the way through lunch), not bothering to utter more than a few words, but today, he seems uncharacteristically on edge, waiting for you at the corner of the gym with a wrinkle between his brows.
“why are you on a first name basis with him?”
“everyone calls him reo.” he shrugs. “why him?”
“i never said i was into him.”
“then what's all that partner thing about?” he asks, which confuses you a bit. you doubt that reo would go around announcing to everyone how you teasingly called him ‘partner’ and practically dragged him to a date against his will, but it's not like him and nagi are close either, so you wonder where nagi has heard this information from. then, you suddenly recall back to yesterday, where you saw the curtain of your neighbor’s bedroom window swinging side-to-side, as if it was drawn close a mere second before you looked up.
it seems that your mind wasn't playing tricks with you after all, and that a certain someone was eavesdropping on your conversation with reo as he walked you to your door.
“fake partners, you mean? and it was a just a joke—i met him that day.”
“that day? why are you acting so close if you've just met that day?”
“you're awfully talkative today, seishiro.”
“i know. it's making me exhausted, and it's all your fault.” he then presses his weight against you, leaning his forehead on your shoulder—as he always does when he's tired and you're within reach. your eyes widen immediately, darting around the gymnasium to see if any of your classmates has noticed.
you don't want people to get the wrong idea about you two. it's not because it kills your chances with anyone due to the assumption that you aren't single (which you still very much are, by the way), or even because of potential issues of being a two-timer due to a certain rich boy—it's just that whenever you get asked if you and your best friend are together, you can't help but flinch from the idea, like ice is being poured inside the back of your shirt. you don’t really know what to call it, but you do know that you've answered the question a hundred times and you're positively sick of it.
“i told you to stop doing this in public,” you hiss, trying to push the giant, clingy sloth off you. “and stop whining, nagi. i’m not going anywhere. besides, i’m not even looking for a relationship or anything like that. not after… you know, what happened during our first year.”
he lifts his head up, frowning at you. “don’t call me nagi. just ‘cause you met a new guy doesn't mean you get to call me nagi.”
you raise an unimpressed brow. what’s his problem? “only if you stop whining.”
“…‘m not.” he slurs his words together, only proving your point.
“yes you are!”
“why do you have to be so annoying? you're such a pain,” he sighs, now walking away from you.
“i'm the annoying one?! and don't call me a pain, you—!” without hesitation, you promptly snatch a red ball from the steel ball cart beside you before swinging your arm at him, slamming the dodgeball right to his head. well, you tried to, at least; even with his back facing towards you, nagi only takes one step to the side to avoid it.
“your shitty aim sucks balls,” the tall male comments unenthusiastically, his white fringe falling over his eyes as he gazes at you over his shoulder. his nonchalance only spurs you on, now hauling multiple dodgeballs at him.
“how about you suck my ba—”
“give it up already. you're never gonna hit me.” and nagi actually has the audacity to yawn mid-dodge. of course, it only fuels your irritation even more. you eventually run out of balls to throw, so you mindlessly grab the nearest object to your right and chuck that as well.
…which unfortunately, happens to be nagi’s phone that he's snuck inside the gym, peeking under a face towel on the bench.
“oh, fu—”
because of your (rightfully) so-called shitty aim, it swung way up high to the left, a few steps away from nagi. in less than a second, he realizes what you have flung at him, and his body moves instinctively; he throws himself towards it, swinging his leg upward and trapping it with his foot with perfect ease before it has the chance to plummet down on the floor.
“why are you making me move so much…” he sighs. “what a pain.”
“you’re supposed to move anyways, we're in PE. you're welcome,” you smugly reason out. and then not even a second later you fold, shoulders curling inwards as you glance toward his phone; if it weren't for his godly reflexes, you would've broken it. with a small voice, you meekly add, “sorry.”
nagi shrugs in response.
when he saunters over to place his phone on the bench again, a silver glint catches your eye. a small charm swings lightly, small beads of white and black strung haphazardly together attached to the side of his phone case.
“wait, this is…” a phone charm crafted by hand, which is your birthday present for him four years ago. “i didnt know you still had that.”
“why wouldn't i?”
“where was it this whole time? this wasn't here a few days ago.”
“i just kept it in my drawer ‘cause i don’t wanna lose it.”
tilting your head to the side, you ask, “so why'd you suddenly decide to attach it to your phone now?”
he looks away, scratching the back of his neck. “…dunno.”
eyes dropping into slits, you mutter, “you know, that kinda sounds sus—”
“hey! that was amazing! nagi, right? you should play soccer with me!”
nagi and yourself both turn to the direction of the sudden voice, seeing a familiar figure running towards you, vivid purple eyes gleaming under the gymnasium’s stark white lights.
“mikage?” you exclaim.
ever so slightly, nagi sharpens his usual droopy eyes. “nah.” he immediately says, turning on his heel.
“seishiro? wait, weren't you supposed to be looking for a club?”
“don’t really care.” you follow him, lightly jogging to keep up. as soon as you catch up by his side, the taller male glances at you as he asks, “will you join too?”
is he seriously asking you that… “no?”
“then i won't.” nagi concludes as he continues to walk away from reo.
“hey, wait up!” reo calls out, placing a hand on your shoulder. “ah, i was completely shut down… say, will you help me convince him?”
your brows shoot up as your gaze flicks down where he's casually touching you. after your initial confusion of who he is yesterday, you then recognize him after learning his name—the most popular boy in school, known for his good looks, charisma, and most especially, his wealth. he gets along well with literally everyone, and acts genuinely close with them even if they aren't.
“uh, why should i?”
“remember that limited edition merch you like? i can get you the rest of the collection. in fact, i’ll even buy out the whole place just for you.”
“wha– seriously?” you feel your eye twitch. damn rich people. “it was limited edition. they all ran out of stock already.”
“i have my ways.” well, that's not shady at all. he flashes a grin at your skepticism, winking at you, “anything for my partner.”
and you now understand why he's earned his title. this is probably how he always gets what he wants—with a smile like that, anyone would drop to their knees and do whatever he’d ask. two years ago, you would've keeled over for attention like this, but now, you're nothing but indifferent.
he places his hands on both of your shoulders now, completely stopping you from taking off. wide violet eyes scrutinize your own, making you scrunch your nose at the close proximity. “shouldn't you be begging him and not me?”
“yeah, but...” reo swears he feels an air of animosity radiating from the white-haired male, and that's why he has decided to turn you instead. “you wouldn't leave your partner hanging, right? as partners, we help each other out, riiiight?” he says, dragging his words out.
you lean as far as you physically can from his grip, but he doesn't seem to care, excitedly looking at you with stars evident in his eyes. “mikage, you—” he smiles at you, bright and blinding, and you find yourself withering under his intense gaze. “okay, fine, just—”
“well, that's settled then! they’re joining the club too, nagi seishiro. they can be our manager.” you briefly wonder why he didn't outright offer to have you join the team, but he probably saw how you threw the dodgeballs earlier… though it's not like you have to use your hands in soccer, so what the hell, this is kind of insulting.
“says who, mikage?”
“you're gonna come watch all our games?” he negotiates.
“why don’t you offer that i join the team?”
“ahahaha. haha. hah.” he laughs awkwardly, swinging an arm around your shoulder and ultimately evading your question.
because you were too busy trying to shrug him off, you miss the way nagi’s eyes zero on to reo’s arm around you, wordlessly observing the whole interaction with his lips pressed taut.
you still don’t know why reo hasn't moved away; he's so close that you can see the dark amethyst specks in his irises, the long strands that frame his face are lightly tickling your cheek, and if you lean in even just an inch, you can practically—
“you said anything i want, right?” your voice drops to a low whisper, and reo nods slowly, still seemingly oblivious to the lack of space between you.
“then... what if i said i wanted a kiss?”
reo’s smile drops immediately, recoiling away from you as if you've slapped him, his whole entire face heating up all the way to the tips of his ears. finally out of his grasp, you erupt into boisterous laughter, shaking your head as you leave the flustered boy alone and catching up to nagi.
likes/reblogs/feedback appreciated ♡
#blue lock x reader#nagi seishiro x reader#mikage reo x reader#reo mikage x reader#bllk x reader#bllk x you
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fuck it, elden ring DLC rant (spoilers) (long post ... oh dear)
so, to start this- this is a very emotional reaction, so take everything with a ton of salT (i need to get this out of my system bc i need to go and do stuff today, i literally couldnt get much more than 3 hours of sleep bc my mind was racing) i only know two screenshots and what others have told me (thank you) so i might be missing more context and havent seen or read it myself
(more details and spoilers for the DLC below the read more thingy)
also, just to explain a bit, i dont usually get this upset about things i like, i like alot of things, but its RARE as fuck that i care, like actually care care about something, and that just kinda happens, i dont choose it or can decide to not care, i just do, and when something like this happens its like ... a sort of grief? i cant help but care about it but it messes with me emotionally, i have no control over it and cant change anything about it when it gets bad or done dirty, leavign me to just have to watch it be real even when i dont want to accept it-- i wouldnt say so much that i 'expect' somethign specific and cant handle when its not like that (common accusation about disliking totk)- and no i dont have somethign specific in mind, i just dont want it to be bad OR things that seem done and closed off suddendly out of nowhere be revealed to 'actually' have been like this, new stuff that either makes no sense or invalidates alot about what i valued about it, what i thought was the point
(i remember two .. my only two other intersts before- see what i mean RARE- that also went down simiarly like this; transformers (bay movies and mainly prime series, listen i didnt choose it either) with each movie it got more messy and stupid, primes second(?) season had an end i hated and the following movie was the final nail in the coffin- and one piece after that, which i slowly fell out of love with bc every chapter seemed to go more into a direction i didnt like, then the reveal that luffy is a god actually was my final ok i hate that moment)
i knew demise for a long time but wasnt obsessed about him at all, it took me learning about how hylia was depicted in a non canon (?) manga (which made me annoyed me bc i didnt like it and made a design for her to counter demises instead) and then reading his few lines of dialog about her again that it suddendly HIT me, like cupids arrow into my head-- i liked but wasnt that super interested into elden ring until radahn showed up, instantly his design made me go owo and then learning his (base game) lore it HIT me (i love sort of tragic side characters that might have been powerful or heroic at some point but now arent anymore- not saying he is that elden rings lore i messy and no ones good tm- and especially so if that character is widely hated for no good reason, dismissed or forgotten, has little lore etc)
i have things i like but dont care this much about, like okami or bloodborne, i like it alot, theres characters i really like (oki) but im not like, fixated on them?- and to have two at the same time, while not equally strong, i dont think i had before, and then have both be damaged or potentially lose it in a similar way within barely a year hurts so damn much--- anyway, getting into the actual rant now lol
so, to sum things up (that i know), in the elden ring DLC later on
miquella is actually a master manipulator and brainwasher (even to his sister???? which means alot of impactful things about his relationship to people is kinda invalidated or made meaningless, shitty)
he wanted to become a god by marrying radahn (his half? brother, same father) of all people that has never been mentioned before until now somehow?? ) you can argue it was hinted to but i find it completely out of left field
miquella sent malenia after radahn to kill him so he could be put into the realm of shadow so miquella could marry him (there were better candidates for that??)- its unclear (to me) if radahn ever actually accepted when sound of mind or even knew about it at all, but failed and he was isntead inflicted with rot to slowly waste away but not die (like he is in base game)
which also means that, what i found really impactful in base game, the festival of radahn, that i thought was a tragic sort of last wish/effort for of radahn to grant him an honorable death as a respected general after being made into mindless people eating zombie, organized by his soldiers/friends- might have been just yet another attempt to kill him and get him over there to miquella (and even if not, it still makes it way less impactful and now i feel like letting him continue to roam as a zombie is more of a favor than killing him bc hes just gonna a puppet again! which turns the whole tradgedy of the stuff in base game on its head imo)
you need to kill him to get into the DLC (and i was even sus of that but shrugged it off when i heard it ..) bc that way miquella could take whatever was left of his soul and stitch it into mohgs corpse?? (which is why hes so small in that DLC fight) bc his body was rotten by that point, which also allowed miquella to control radahn and make him agree, force him to do whatever miq wanted (which ALSO might mean mohg 'kidnapping' miquella wasnt that actually but mohg too was manipulated so oud kill him and make his remains usable)
radahn in DLC is a voiceless meat puppet essentially ... like a mindless rotting zombie eating friends and fow alike wasnt enough- also means that we never ACTUALLY GET OT KNOW RADAHN HIMSELF bc hes eithe a zombie or a literal puppet (if you are gonna do him dirty at least let us meet actual real him *cries*)
his fight is super hard apparently (though i have been hearing people complain about the entire DLC being too hard, while the -casual player- streamer i watched is beating main bosses so fast they dont even get to start their second phase) when his fight in base game, and him by extentsion, was also hated bc of that ALREADY, which means more people are gonna hate his guts (he doesnt deserve that!!) AND most people probably wont get or care that its not actually HIM him so its like a repeat boss that everyone hates
it feels weirldy forced in for it to be radahn (like miquella was already said to be one of the strongest gods out there .. why hed want radahn so badly when his goal seemed to be rather .. combat less?? if you get what i mean, and radahn also rejected him??? and the tarnished is right there too????) bc theres plenty others it would have worked with that are barely used- it feels like someone jsut wanting him to be tha main guy not matter what (when he worked so much better as a side character!!!!)
a tragic but well rounded off side character (imo) was made into the main guy this is all about actually tm (i generally dont like main guys and this jsut feels so .... it just hurts, it didnt feel foreshadowed at all, and its not even truly HIM that is reveal to be a creepy asshat but hes just manipulated and controlled with the whole time, be it by rot or miquella)
and for miquella its like, no theres no even mildly good people there, hes brainwashed and manipulated everyone actually tm, a giant plan all to force his half brother into marrying him by making him into a corpse puppet bc he rejected miquella- inlcuding potentially manipulating his own twin sister, which goes agaisnt what you learn of what hes done for her in the base game i think?? (not that much into that part but yeah ... it feels unfair to her too)
it also kinda just leaves other lore from the base game in the dust? like the whole haligtree plan, how miquella cared for the rejected (i guess he didnt then??? and it was just more manipulation tm??) that castle with the eclipse stuff
(is the gloom eyes queen, marika, and or st trina even .. important at all to any of this??)
ok from reading tweets from people talkign about it, miquella says radahn agreed apparently but whether thats true remains uncertain and given the circumstances i do not think radahn did- others said that it kinda sounds he agreed to something that he didnt think would involve him marrying miquella
everything feels like its in shambles for every fan of every involved chaarcter
yes i know you can argue that it was all planned from the start and meant to be a twist and everything and that people having a different idea of characters isnt the fault of the creators .... only to some degree bc why then build up make so much lore and story about stuff that turns out to be like saying 'actually it was all a lie' like its not valid to feel betrayed then, you can plan things out all you want but that doesnt mean it cant be bad oder underwhelming
(i wished to be able to meet or know more about radahn but like in a non rot way or like past flashback whatever kind of way and then not like this anyway, like i was interested into his relationship with jerren and just .. more about him i suppose the monkey paw has curled hasnt it -or however you say that-)
and there i was like two days ago going "omg radahn mention!!!" when that one .. feyja? NPC says she fought alongside him at some point ............................................................
leonard isnt there in the DLC to my knowledge, you know it cant be truly radahn if his horse isnt there (the sole reason he learned gravitiy magic for and it stayed with him even after the rot!!! i know people have started to hate it bc people love that but i love that, it made him so endearing to me, like a character i already found cool omg has a confirmed softer spot??? in MY fromsoftware title??)
sorry for the long post of rambling, i am a mess, barely slept 3 hours, yes i am weird to care, autisms or whatever .. i need to go somewhere in an hour and havent prepared as all bc i needed my thoughts out of my head- might have forgotten stuff, idk if i will add it later or just kinda .. stew in it for a while
(and yes a big point why i feel so strongly is both bc its just gonna make more people hate him even more AND feels so invalidating of alot of other stuff- pulls other characters down with it- the entire time i was watching the streams i and trailers i thought i was like, its onw thing, with miquellas littel adventure and more background info on marika mostly on its own from the base game BUT NO I GUESS)
(read all this in the sense of an utteraly disoriented confused and drunken seagull yelling around pls i am not in serious mental distress ..)
#ganondoodles talks#elden ring#elden ring spoilers#i just .....#hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh#congrats! everyone loses! yippie!#gonna cope with it better later but had to get it out#and i dont have time ofr more tags i need to get going urgently#feel free to add your own knowledge- grievances whatever to this#long post
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I SAW DRAGON AND STARTEDNABRAGRHAHB
holding out my idea of wolfwalkers type shit but with dragons. im jsutbtrghgrhgbrjrghrgjngrughibkjfggfhbjgrfihdkjh SMASHING MY HANDS ON MY DESK. PLEASE.
just imagining big angry dragon miguel with gold accents trying his damn hardest not to snap as hes got a bunch of smaller dragons clambering on him and excitedly talking while waiting to be told what to do. being dragons and all they go around and make sure theres peace between kingdoms and stuff ....
sobbing into my hands. i need to see more dragon content im GGGGHR AAHHHHHH
YES OMG PMG I LOVE DRAGON AU’S (so sorry this is kinda late 🙏 school seriously beat me up this week. Also YOUR ART IS SO SO SO COOL!)
(Also also I’m so sorry but I’m not familiar with the wolf walkers series and never got the chance to watch it :(( but I absolutely love the animation style and premise from the ads I’ve seen)
THIS IS NOT NSFW AT ALL!!! KINK BLOGS AND NSFW BLOGS DNI
I can just imagine miguel grumpily walking around with all of the spider kids either nestled on his back or chattering somewhere in the cave, waiting to get assigned their missions. I am in LOVE with the idea of Miguel sending them out to keep the peace between humans since sometimes humans can be very… not wise. Idk actually, maybe the some of the spider kids are humans and that’s how they meet Miguel or peter and Jess (bc I’d love to see them as dragons theyre so cool)
imagine a human Hobie just confidently walking around a dragon’s cave/network society and just casually arguing with a giant dragon Miguel. I’m feel like he’d get in the dumbest arguments with him just for the giggles. I can see him also baby sitting a hatchling mayday, keeping her fully entertained while Peter goes off to finish missions too dangerous to bring her along. Their little interactions in atsv were adorable especially the little salute he gave her.
or the fight between miles and Miguel ☹️ even tho I love him (Miguel) and understand why he did that and his motives, I’ll always feel so bad for miles. I feel like it would even be worse because instead of having a 6’9 roughly judged 310 pounds of muscle man chasing after you and pinning you down, there’s a ten ton dragon hellbent on having your dad die for the sake of the canon, claws, wings, VENOM/FIREBREATHING. It’s pretty much game over at that point. Ofc miles is a resourceful amazing wonderful intelligent human so I think he’d be able to reason with him. Besides, even then I kinda doubt Miguel would want to kill a kid, even if they’re a human. Nurturing instincts don’t go away after ur daughter dies 😋! Actually Miguel might even nom miles in an effort to keep him from messing up the canon :( can you imagine being so so terrified of this huge creature and getting nommed and you don’t know you’re safe and you’re panicking and —
The hurt and comfort is strong here :o. And the guilt. So much guilt. Once they work out their issues (there are so so so many poor dudes) I’m sure they’ll be besties. But that’s for human miles au
dragon miles would definitely get the short end of the stick. Even if he’s a hatchling (kind of, he’s in that odd stage between adult and adolescent but on the younger side) he’s still a whole lot more durable than if he’s a human. Which means that Miguel won’t be nearly as cautious handling him physically. Ouch. Miguel genuinely wants to protect miles in the movie but does it in the worst way possible. That would probably transfer over to this universe too.
But still because I absolutely LIVE for found family, I want to imagine they work through their problems in a long and very very non linear path that has setbacks and leaps forward and minor changes and everything because I love all of these characters sm and without depth they don’t feel like people. Plus imagining sleepy spider kids/dragons stumbling into Miguel’s section of the cave system/lair and deciding to take a quick nap there because it feels safe and waking up with Miguel curled loosely around them, wing slightly shielding them from the chilly drafts and hsjskskdjskj they have my heart. (Miguel will deny it later.)
or peter b taking the human kids out flying to let them feel at least a little what it’s like to taste the sky while Miguel lurks in the background anxiously, crimson eyes tense just in case peter accidentally drops one of them. Not that he would, he may be goofy but he’s most definitely not stupid.
I can imagine Miguel trying his hardest to stop some of the kids from doing things that he thinks is wayyy too dangerous for them and just giving up and tucking them away in his brooding pouch. If they won’t listen to his very very valid concerns then he’ll just have to make sure they don’t go anywhere >:(. Plus it’s warm and safe and even though Miguel will never admit it, he feels calmer if they’re there, protected completely bc he’ll never let anything hurt them. At least not while they’re nestled in one of the literal safest places in the world. I can’t imagine anyone would have an easy time getting to them when there’s a very protective and vengeful dragon guarding his precious brood.
and I haven’t even really gotten into the other characters either :( especially exploring the relationship between Jess and Gwen or Hobie and miles/gwen and pav but I feel like I’m writing too much so I’ll end it here. If you or anyone else wants to continue this thread/au PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE GIVE ME AN ASK! I LOVE THIS AU SM 😭😭
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Genesis
12:06 oh my god I have once again woken up too early and this time it was not on purpose.
TRYING to speed run some of this pre-work. Updates later but GOOD MORNING
9:12 I am back and working on two chapters at the same time. BECAUSE I NEED TO CONCEPT A DAMN ANGEL FOR HEIDI AND KENNY TO FIGHT. I CONCEPTED ONE AT WORK BUT THEY CAN'T FIGHT THIS ONE LMFAO
Also I need a flashback for Kyle so I'm literally just playing procrastinator olympics as I pingpong between two chapters. I might work on Bound for a bit tonight though, ngl. Because I am 21 chapters completed deep and 71.9k words in on this and Bound has THREE CHAPTERS READY AND BOUND HAS INTERMISSION CHAPTERS SO TECHNICALLY TWO LIKE. I WANT THE OPTION TO NOT WRITE WHEN MY SEMESTER STARTS!!!! (It's not like I'd even follow that but STILL.)
Also next line up is prob not gonna have a fic for every day, much to my own disappointment. Because school literally starts in FOURTEEN DAYS. and I only have four things ready to go. And I am determined to finish Genesis before my semester starts. Like I'm definitely gonna take a solid break from this series before I start Revelation, because that is going to be A LOT. (I do not think I will be taking much of a break between Revelation and Karma though, ngl. Bc each part starts, like, immediately after the previous one, but I KNOW how Revelation ends and Karma starts already and it has me LOSING MY SHIT. LIKE THE ENDING OF FUCKING REVELATION IS INSANEEEEEEE. And I hope not a soul sees it coming despite it being RIGHT THERE.)
I am sad though because I did want to start on Princess of Fire and get to a point where regular posts can pull up on that because I genuinely really like the concept and like, fine, I'm getting better at writing (and it is SOT and I do not wanna post a shit SOT fic on Wintergrew's internet) as I go so maybe holding off isn't a huge deal BUT I WANT Y'ALL TO FUCKING SEE THE VISION‼️‼️‼️
I honestly wish I could livestream my brain does that make sense LMFAO
2:24: Tears just rolled down my cheeks at the realization that we have not had one goddamn (exclusively) Bebe centric chapter and I am trying to write chapter 24. OH MY GOD. I can't even give her a full filler chapter because I wan't my filler to be like LIGHT HEARTED AND FUN. I CAN'T JUST STRETCH OUT LIKE 3K WORDS OF HER JUST EXISTING IN THE MIDDLE OF ANY OF THIS. LIKE WE ARE TEN CHAPTERS DEEP INTO THE WORSE SHIT. OH MY GOD I HATE IT HERE. Like I actually was just scrolling through the chapter titles and was like 'oh we have Stan! We have Craig! We have duhduhduhduhduh.' AND I GOT TO THE BEGINNING AND THERE IS NO FUCKING BEBE CHAPTER?????? WHAT THE FUCK! (I literally did this with Butters in Dandelion and had the same reaction why is it that all of my favorite fucking characters I do this to???? HOW. Like, we get more of her in Revelations but WHAT! THE! FUCK!)
So yeah, 24 is gonna be Bebe, despite me kinda wanting it to be Tam or Wendy.
Also I'm reading 'You're Not Mine Anymore' AGAIN (because even though I said I hated it, that chapter has literally embedded itself in my brain. Like, it's so fucking disturbing and so sad and I actually wanna throw myself out my window every time I think about it LMFAO)
2:55 I changed one sentence in this chapter and now I'm actually gonna sob. I hate it here.
4:30 I got distracted and watched tik toks since my last update, specifically spending like an entire ten minutes absolutely geeking over the 1970's gymnastics olympics and I am now back at my keyboard. I got a very specific bit of inspiration and it is fucking TERRIFYING.
Anyways. RIP Craig. Like seriously, dude is going THROUGH IT. This is what I get for ignoring him for like a week and a half (two weeks? ish. I'm settling on ish, here. A VAGUE, BUT NOT VERY LONG AMOUNT OF TIME) of their time when he is actively losing his shit.
I think killing him and Tweek off at this point is more of a mercy killing than anything on my part why did I do this to them I am so sad. AND THE FACT THAT THEIR DEATHS IS WHAT THIS WHOLE FIC GOT CONCEPTED AROUND IS FUCKING INSANE. LIKE I WROTE THEIR DEATH SCENE AND WAS LIKE WELP GOTTA WRITE A MAGICAL GIRL FIC.
And now I'm slowly but surely on my way to that chapter and annotating and writing in bits and pieces of THAT chapter and I'm like wow. Wow oh wow. Might need a hallucinations tag. Hypothetically, of course. But also hypothetically, would the hallucinations tag apply to this if said hallucinations are questionably real? Hypothetically. Anyways, when Fall From Grace gets posted, y'all are gonna need like sixteen and a half TWs.
And now I'm off to go write this fucking MESS of a chapter that is the Bebe chapter because I STILL DIDN'T WRITE IT. AND I AM OFFICIALLY DOWN TO THIRTEEN DAYS.
Another hypothetical, while I'm still here before I leave again and don't update until god knows when. Do you guys think I can finish 20 chapters in 13 days? Like, that would be approximately 60-80k words. Do y'all think I got this? And I'm typing that and realizing I thought the wc for this was gonna be like 100k and am now realizing I'm at 74k and just wow. ANYWAYS. LATER. Hope y'all are enjoying my extra long screams into the void tonight.
4:55 Black Swan cries out violently in the background as I realize I have just made five out of six, the quintet is now a trio, and Red is just there not giving a fuck. My head is in my hands. My jaw is dropped. I fear I may be evil for writing this.
May the gods I don't believe in help us all.
(I HAVE NEVER WRITTEN THIS MANY MAJOR CHARACTER DEATHS. MY MAX HAS BEEN TWO SO FAR. THIS IS WHY DESOLATION ENDED THE WAY IT DID BECAUSE I FEARED THIS.)
Eh, fun fact while I'm here again. The original ending of Desolation, everyone was gonna die except for Kyle.
But wow OH WOW. Yeah, this is why I don't write major character death.
It is 6:26 am and I just posted An Answer chapter in attempts to procrastinate this horrible ending further and the realization has dawned on me that I am now involved in the mystery because I'm rereading and I have no idea WHAT THE FUCK is going on. I'm laughing so hard over this. God, how two months can really slip away is insane.
6:49: guys I'm rereading this and I am actually thrown off by my own writing like I fully forgot how off-putting this fic is supposed to be BECAUSE of what happened and why things are like this and I actually fell into my own fucking trap. I'm crying this is so funny HELP
7:02: not me happily reading and giggling over platonic twendy fluff and just getting smacked in the face by shit getting very real very fast. this is wild.
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Thoughts on Uprising Episode 5, Identity
- Beck continuing the trend of getting into trouble with Wrong Place, Wrong Time stuffs. poor kid…
- love that Tron is in this episode more, being the same Grouch as always.
- the disc theft is……. Interesting. We know from Legacy that there is such thing as a forged disc (Zuse mentions it in the list of things Sam needs to get to the Portal); perhaps stolen discs is where those come from? And stray programs are mentioned in Legacy as well, though not expanded upon. Honestly, TRON is FULL of Unexplained Worldbuilding Things that I would give my right hand to know. UGH
- stray programs are such an interesting concept. Like the disc is the program, apparently?? It’s like…. well actually thinking about it, it makes sense?? Kind of???? The program is made of fairly basic code; the disc holds that code and its log of activities, while the body is just a physical manifestation of the code itself. Unlike Users/humans, whose code is an inherent part of them/us, and thus can’t be memory-wiped by swiping an activity log. It’s interesting as fuck, is what I’m saying. Like the philosophical implications of the program being the disc and not the physical person—so Interesting!!!!!
- also the glitches are scary as Fuck. One moment you know what’s going on and then the next you don’t know anything?? Terrifying. And well portrayed by the episode, too, with the fisheye effect on Beck’s closeups and the general blurriness from his PoV.
- could have sworn Cobol was voiced by Ron Perlman, but it was some person I’ve not heard of instead. Doing one heck of a Perlman impression, tbqh.
- Lux is EXTREMELY INTERESTING TO ME. Siren who’s gotten caught up in the black market?? INTERESTING. Also she’s a whole hell of a lot more principled than Cobol, because when she sees Tron it’s like everything changes for her. Also the shaved head is just badass looking.
- meanwhile, a three scene B plot with Zed and Mara!! That took up like six minutes of episode time. Like okayyyyy. Turns out I didn’t need to be so worried about Zed joining the anti-Renegade taskforce, because it turns out Mara kind of guilted him into doing the right thing!!! Good for him I guess.
- Also someone commented on my last commentary post that Bartik here and Bartik in Legacy are the same character/program, and uh. Wonder how THAT happens, because damn. How does one go from happily helping Clu’s forces to hoping a revolution against Clu can be sparked into existence???? Color me intrigued as fuck.
- love Tron’s comments about Beck being his friend at the end there. Especially the bit about trusting someone as a friend and being betrayed, bc from what I know of later episodes, that could be like three different programs!!!! (Clu, like Beck assumes; Dyson I have heard was a friend turned enemy; and then Cyrus as well!! Again I have not watched the whole series and my last dip in was 10 years ago, but from what Discussion I have seen I am making some Assumptions.) also love the comment that he “made the right choice this time”, because that is just dripping with implications that I imagine pay off in future episodes…..
- other details: Purgos as the name of the black market district is interesting, with the obvious name tie to Xtian (or at least Catholic) Purgatory; wonder what the creators meant for us to take from that… // Galt was an interesting one off character; total sleazeball of course, but interesting nonetheless // ngl when they were surrounded by all of Cobol’s goons, I was kinda cackling because like. It’s Tron. Even scarred all to hell he’s gonna kick most of y’all’s asses.
- I am probably gonna watch this episode again with captions on so I can get helpful juicy deets for my TRON horror story fic idea. I gotta do some brainstorming on stuffs tonight for sure.
- that said the brainstorming might have to wait bc the next episode has Paige Backstory and also QUORRA sooooooooo…….. yeah
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Very tiredly made pinned post bc I'm always tired lol
Hi, I'm Knight and this is my personal blog. I go by they/them and he/him. Yes Knight is my irl name.
Cadanain or however you spell it. uh. 🇨🇦 <- from there
ask game
19, aroace, nonbinary(?) and I FUCKING HATE MOST CAR BRANDS. SHUT UP ON EVERY FUCKING SITE EVER AND BECOME THE DIRT I WALK ON!!!!!!!!!!!
DNI: basic dni + zionists, car enthusiasts, NFTbros, people who are violently on either side of the AI art debate*
Not extensive but generally if you're a bigot or support bigots fuck off
*my opinion on AI art is that it seriously, SERIOUSLY needs more regulations, but if I wake up feeling like more shit than I usually feel like I shouldn't be ridiculed and hated by everyone on this damn planet if I occasionally want to pop over to Craiyon and have it generate some art of weird looking dice to cheer myself up. fyi. and stop arguing about whether it's art or not the semantics aren't important!!
And ChatGPT is a wonderful Goomba Name Generator. bite me. /ref
Fandoms I'm in: chess, animation vs., inanimate insanity, steven universe, magic the gathering, smg4, baba is you, murder drones, d&d, owl house, tadc, minecraft, hermitcraft, life series, lifesteal smp, mario (mostly smm2), gravity falls, fnaf (kinda), doom (.......kind of. yes it is because of myhouse.wad), dsmp (but I'm kinda drifting away from that one)
ramble about the bold/orange ones to me‼️‼️‼️
Fandoms im Looking at, but unsure of: the magnus archives, the stanley parable, other object shows like bfdi
Random shit about me and tags i tag under cut (..tags may be changed soon)
I watched all of soul eater and then proceeded to forget everything that happened because I'm stupid
Don't spoil House of Leaves for me, I'm gonna read it soon maybe (<- liar)
I don't fuckign know!!!!!!!!! Redstone!!!!!!!!!! (<- making something Decked Out 2 inspired)
First ever Chessboard Moment: chess.jpg
For personal reasons relating to Words (derogatory), do not talk to me about outer space
do not ask me about No Context Nope Not Giving Any.
tags:
#vent for venting
#grasping at straws for reaching out (e.g "help me with a project please?") Wait when did I make this tag also what does it rnean
#the fuck up won't shut up! for just talking about stuff
#nobody cares huh for stuff I'm actually proud of
#another ruined canvas for art, although most of that will go on @chess-is-art
#look! a blunder! for plugging stuff i have on other sites
#I'm not funny for stuff i add onto when reblogging
#chessboard? sleeping? in this economy? dreams tag
#sticks and stones can break my bones but Words Can Fucking Kill Me for specific vents hold on what the fuck is this tag
#negative iq takes for theories
#cringe comp for videos
#dumb writing for fics
#chessboard saying dumb shit for when I talk to people
#do you want bad or terrible? Polls
#knight and the terrible, horrible, no good, very bad pun for puns. yes commas can go in tags. no I will not say how
#shitty sleep september Have you seen an entire two* month's worth of nightmares in a row? WOULD YOU LIKE TO??
*it happened twice
I don't tag mcyt posts as #minecraft and you shouldn't either! It is #mcyt and the mcyt applicable!
I tag triggers as #tw [thing] (without the brackets when actual thing is involved) current triggers are #tw sui mention but i might forget to use it once in a while so uhh just block #vent sorry
projects will be tagged as #project: [name]. "Project:" will not be part of the name by default
Uh I'll think of more if I need to
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Hey um, 1 question, do you have a mandalorian self Insert?
I need to see them for...
Science
👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀 yes i do! i have a picrew of them but i also drew them, like, twice-
here's the picrew! (credit)
and here are my terrible drawings
their outfit might change bc i'm terrible at fashion wjdhdhdh
#they were once a jedi but they retired bc they lost too much to that job wjshjdjdh#that 'too much' being sleep and their dear precious friend#they thought din wouldn't like them bc of their history but oh guess what he gives no fucks#so like. yeah now they're here with the stoic bounty hunter wjehehjdhd#that might change bc i need to watch his damn series!#but that's all i've got for now#they met din when he was injured#they're a caretaker now btw#so when din came to their clinic. they weren't fazed at all they're already used to seeing naked bodies of men lmao im djhddhhfh#but for some reason they start to feel different around din as he comes by more and more#wow ok bye i'm rambling again ejehhdb#👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀 i'm very sus of u lux#xelle.answered#do i tag this with my content tag or what#oh well y not#xelle.content#lux tag 🏵️#s/i: lascaux cav#⚔️ the hidden bounty in my heart
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The Promise of Rain
A/n finally writing that Kaz Brekker x reader angsty-fluff where the reader is all sunshine-y and Kaz is dramatic as always lol
Might make this a blurb series bc i like this dynamic so much lol
Pairing: Kaz Brekker x sunshine-y reader
Summary: After a mission gone wrong, Kaz has a conversation with the reader (who’s a runaway princess) about what happens to people who stay near him.
--
He once said that he didn’t believe in Saints. A moment later he conceded that perhaps they existed in order to appease Inej, but he was quick to tact on that if Saints existed they didn’t care about him. Inej and I had exchanged a look, she pleaded with me in silence to let him be. I opened my mouth despite the look in her eyes, but he had walked away before I could get any words out.
He believes that the Saints don’t care about him, but as soon as he was dragged in by Jesper, bleeding and more broken than usual, it had started to rain. The rain is a promise. The rain is a sign that he will wake up.
I tap a finger against the forgotten book on my lap, ignoring the dried blood I’ve been too anxious to wash off. When Kaz wakes up he’ll either scold me or partially tease me for waiting here by his bedside. The rain continues, cascading down invisible hope.
“Save your prayers, even for you the Saints won’t regard me.” Kaz. His voice is raspier than it should be and his slight condescension is blighted by the tired flatness of it. But it’s him. He’s speaking.
I tear my gaze away from the window, almost forgetting to tamper down my relief before finally looking at him. I haven’t known him long enough to see him in any level of defeat, but I’ve heard enough stories. The fictional exaggeration of those that fear him have made him seem so immortal. Some part of me must have internalized that because to see him like this, to see him so human is too intimate.
“Don’t be so narcissistic.” Something about Kaz always leaves me feeling challenged, like each comment is some kind of dare. I adjust my posture. “I wasn’t praying because I knew you’d be okay.”
His expression is unchanging. “So much faith in me?”
There’s a soft edge to his words, an attempt to twist some kind of awkward denial out of me. Some days I don’t think Kaz enjoys anything and then other days I think he enjoys any misstep in my words.
I shrug, pushing down the flood of relief still attempting to crawl out of my chest. “You’re always okay.” I scratch the back of my wrist idly. “It seems the safe bet.”
“Don’t tell me you’ve been taking gambling advice from Jesper.”
I half roll my eyes. “No--Jesper and I don’t play together anymore.” I let out an easy sigh. “Last time I beat him he bordered on a hissy fit.” There’s the slightest hint of upturning at the corners of his lips. “I should go tell Jesper and Inej you’re awake.”
“I think you should change out of that dress first.”
He was more likable when I thought he might die at any second. “Wow--Kaz Brekker the professional stylist.” He has no right to judge the formal gown I’m in. Yes, my outfit is ridiculous, but I’m only wearing it because the Crows needed someone they knew at a merchant’s party for a part of some scheme they wouldn’t share the details of with me. “Yes, I’m aware that this dress is more tulle than anything else, but I’m only wearing it because I was helping you.”
I wait for some retort about how he could have managed without my assistance or some kind of comment about how I didn’t need such a large dress to flirt and distract the guards as the Crows snuck into the merchant’s private office. “You fit in there more than you said you would.”
From anyone else, I’d consider this an insult. “I was making an effort for the sake of your plans.”
“I saw you before I went into the office, you knew the dances, the man took your hand.”
That’s the weirdest observation I’ve ever witnessed someone reflect on. “That’s how those dances tend to work.” I don’t hide the confusion in my expression. “How much blood did you lose?”
Kaz’s piercing gaze drops to the blanket on his lap. “Not a concerning amount.”
“Why do I feel like we have different definitions of ‘concerning’?”
His eyes flit upwards, a partial smirk playing at his lips. “We define a lot of things differently.” He pauses, “You defined the life you slipped into so easily tonight as something you could never do.”
“I can’t.” What is his problem? “One dance is different than an eternity of planning teas and marrying some man who only keeps me so I can rear his children.”
“You’d end up marrying someone who could give you things.”
He better not be implying I should be having children. I’m seriously starting to hope he did lose a significant amount of blood because that would be some kind of explanation. “I don’t want anyone to be giving me children right now, but I guess your concern is ni--”
“No, no,” he screws his eyes shut for a long second, “You know what I meant.” I stay silent. “You’re technically a princess, y/n, you could have more than the Barrel.” There’s an odd silence as he pauses. “Someone like you should have more than the Barrel.”
He speaks like his word is law. That’s the one habit of his I can never seem to forgive. Is Kaz telling me to go home? To go back to a mother who dreams of marrying me off and a father with a temper that often leads to violence? He may be Dirtyhands, but he is no one to tell me who to go back to. Not after I risked my anonymity to get him into that merchant’s office.
I shut my book and stand in one swift motion. “I’m going to tell Jesper and Inej that you’re awake.”
“Y/n.” I ignore him. “Y/n.” Again, I ignore him, approaching the doorway. The rustling of sheets leaves me frozen, hand on the doorknob. “Y/n.”
Without thinking, I turn on my heels while glaring. There’s no way he’s proud enough to have climbed out of bed wi--and he’s standing. Standing almost directly behind me.
“Kaz Brekker, I am going to say this one time and one time only.” I keep my words measured and my tone flat. No room for argument. “You just had nine stitches put in near your heart, get your ass back in bed before that is no longer your only injury.”
He pauses, lips pressed together into a tight white line. And then his mouth opens, pried open by an oddly light sound. Did he just--Did Kaz Brekker just laugh? He doesn’t laugh. I didn’t think he was physically capable, and now he laughs while I’m threatening him? I should hit him on principle alone and damn the consequences.
“Did you--” I’m gaping at him with a rage I am not accustomed to. “Did you just laugh?”
Kaz is quick to shut his mouth. “You did swear you’d get me to laugh one day.”
Saints--now he chooses to have some kind of sense of humor. “Not while I was threatening you for being an idiot after saying my lineage means that I’m meant to be trapped in the life I desire least.”
“I didn’t say that.” I raise an eyebrow. “You don’t deserve more than this because of your family, you deserve more than this because--” He cuts himself off with a sharp sigh. “Do you remember what happened the day we met?”
He had wanted to return me to my father for the money. I had managed to convince him I could be more useful working for him without profit. The first day had been tense, I had sworn to myself that I would hate him forever.
“I remember really hating you.” I remember thinking him beautiful despite his darkness. “I remember it started raining on our way here.”
“You had a hood, but you pushed it off your head to feel the rain.” I don’t remember that because indulging in the rain is instinctual to me. “You looked at the rain, and you smiled--and then you saw a woman with a child and you took off your hood and gave it to them.”
“What does that have to d--”
“Watching that felt like intruding on an intimate moment I had no business knowing about, but it wasn’t that to you. That moment was nothing to you because that moment was who you are.”
I don’t understand what he sees in something I can barely remember. “Kaz, what does that have to do with anything?”
“I’m the monster that children believe live under their beds, I’m the bastard of the Barrel, I’m someone who gets blood on everything near them.” His gaze is harsher than I’ve ever seen it as he focuses on the dried blood splotched across my hands and arms. “And then I can’t even help you wash it off.”
Those last words are the closest to broken I’ve ever heard him sound. “Kaz--”
“And you’re the girl who looks at the rain like it’s a gift from the Saints.”
Is he implying what I think he’s implying? Even if I believed him such a source of evil, even if I felt like touch mattered that much--why would he care? I keep the much more frightening implication at bay as I exhale. Clarity will only make this conversation worse. “That doesn’t matter.” The words leave me in a low whisper.
I stare at the ground until his silence is something I can no longer bear. Looking up as cautiously as possible, I take in his expression. I’ve never seen him look so--so enraged. “It doesn’t matter?!” He doesn’t bother hiding the fact that he’s practically seething. “I’ve viewed your presence here as temporary since you first came and despite that, when I saw you there…” The breath he lets out is practically pained. “When I saw what your life is meant to be--I didn’t want you to go.”
The admission breaks something hard in my chest. “I never wanted to go.” My eyeline drops to the ground. “I didn’t want to go when you were trying to make me, I didn’t want to go when it was only for that evening.” I swallow a lump of emotion restricting my throat. “When you were bleeding out and Jesper had to carry you back here I let myself imagine what it’d be like if you died. And it hurt. It hurt so badly I asked myself if I would rather never know you than feel that pain.”
“Would you?” His voice has gone hollow.
I finally look up again. “No.” That word leaves me more bare than any physical touch ever could.
“I stain everything that stays with me,” his voice has seamlessly shifted back to a tone meant for business, “Me wanting you to stay is more than enough reason for you to leave.”
My chest aches as emotions I’ll never be able to place a name to pound against my chest. “I’m a princess that ran away from her family and tried to befriend her kidnapper--you can’t possibly be narcissistic enough to believe that you’re what’s corrupted me.”
“Y/n,” his voice is gravely again, the way it was when he first woke up.
“No. What could you possibly think I’d say to that?” He’s insane--I’m not even sure I understand what he’s implying. “You know I’ll never agree with what you’re saying, so I have no idea what kind of reaction you’re looking for.”
“Maybe a genuine one.”
The comment is so frustrating I can’t help but roll my eyes. The irony of Kaz Brekker asking for a genuine reaction to an emotionally heavy comment is almost laughable. “My genuine reaction is that you’re acting like an idiot because I don’t agree with anything you’re saying, but calling someone an idiot after they’ve been stabbed in the chest is a little insensitive so I can’t give you my genuine reaction.”
Kaz half-scoffs, “You don’t agree? Y/n--are you hearing me!? I want--I want you to stay.” Even angry, the admission warms me. He lets out a frustrated sigh. “More than that I want--”
“What?”
He shakes his head once. “I want something that can never be because I can’t give what needs to be given to get it.”
“Kaz, if it involves me staying you don’t need to give anything for that because I don’t want to go.”
“I-want-you-to-stay-with-me.” The admission is pried from him by some invisible force. He speaks so fiercely the sentence comes out as one angry word.
He speaks so quickly a part of me is convinced that I misheard him. I watch him as he moves back to the bed, sitting down in a way so resigned I wonder if I blurted something out on instinct.
“Kaz,” this is embarrassing, “I wanted to stay with you even when I wanted to hate you.”
I take in his measured expression, the only thing implying any kind of reaction is the way his eyebrows draw together. “Don’t say that, you don’t understand what that means.”
“Why? Because you’re convinced you’ll ruin me?”
“Y/n, we’d be together with a wall between us, keeping us from ever touching.”
“I will tolerate any amount of damage you’re so convinced staying with you will bring, I will stay with you and never touch you and think nothing of it--but I will not stay with you just to stand in front of a wall.” I let out a tired breath. “I will stay with you but my one condition will be that you have to let me know you.”
Kaz’s intense gaze wavers. “The first thing you’ll know is that me allowing you to stay is a testament to my greed.”
I give him a sharp look, “It’s not greed if I want to be here.”
He half sighs, leaning against a pillow as he turns to look out the window. “It’s raining,” he muses, “The Saints must have done that for you.”
The sentiment is so soft my heart feels like it’s constricting. “I thought you didn’t believe in the Saints.”
“If they exist, they do so for people like you.”
I push past the emotion in my chest as I move to sit in the same chair I was in earlier. “I was honest when I said I didn’t pray for you.” I scratch the back of my arm, a coldness passing over me. “I didn’t pray because I knew you would be okay because you had to be.”
“They wouldn’t have saved me,” he mumbles, “Or maybe they would have for you.”
I shake my head once, staring at the rain with more fascination than before.
--
General Taglist: @theincredibledeadlyviper @grishaverse7 @lonelystarship
#kaz brekker#kaz brekker x reader#kaz brekker x you#kaz brekker imagine#six of crows#six of crows x reader#six of crows x you#six of crows imagine#six of crows netflix#six of crows show#soc#soc imagine#shadow and bone#shadow and bone x reader#shadow and bone show#grishaverse#grisha#grishavers x reader#grishaverse imagine
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heart-on.
↳ your one-night stand definitely isn’t relationship material, but maybe—just maybe—your manager’s son is.
◇ hoseok x reader ◇ smut | strangers to lovers!au ◇ 10.1k [1/1]
❛❛ my boss is always telling me how perfect her son would be for me and she promises he’s coming to the next holiday party and don’t worry he’s heard all about me too and ALSO there’s this dude i slept with once a couple of months ago and sometimes he still sends me dick pics when i ask him to at 3 in the morning cause seriously dude’s got a good dick ❜❜
notes: welcome to the first installment of the serendipity series! we’re starting with hoseok, because, well, have you met me? 🤣 be warned, however, that this isn’t anywhere near as edited as i’d like so i’ll probably give it another read/edit tomorrow but for now!!! here it is!!!
⇢ series masterlist. | inspired by this post.
warnings: dirty talk bc hoseok’s got a bit of a mouth on him, unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it, kids!), sexting. dick pics, obvi. brief mention of a dead pet goldfish :(
You’re refilling your mug when you hear it. Voices filter out from the kitchen, floating past the coffee station where you’re pouring yourself another drink and hanging in the open air of the hallway that leads back to the rest of the office. They’re familiar voices, too—voices that belong to the resident gossips of your workplace. Lottie’s pitchy, nasal tone melds with Hyejin’s higher one, their conversation interrupted every so often by an exaggerated exclamation or gasp from Sandra, the third and final member of their trio.
“Haven’t you heard? Carolyn’s divorce was finalized over the weekend, the poor thing.”
“I can’t even begin to imagine how she’s feeling. I mean, getting back into dating at her age? Goodness!”
“And now she’ll be all alone at the holiday party, too. How sad is that?”
“It’s tragic. Poor thing.”
Rolling your eyes, you grab a packet of sugar and tear it open, upending it over your mug and watching the crystalline granules fall into the dark liquid within. You know for a fact that Sandra and her husband can’t even stand to be in the same room for an extended period of time, considering how they’d spent most of last year’s holiday party talking to entirely different groups of people. You’d sat two tables away from them during dinner, and they hadn’t even made eye contact once. And as for Lottie and Hyejin, well, you’re certain that their relationships aren’t much better. All three of them are miserable people as far as you’re concerned, and you make a mental note to check in on Carolyn—a sweet woman in her thirties who always keeps chocolate bars in her purse—on your way back to your desk.
“Sheesh. Vultures, the lot of them. Don’t you think?”
You whirl at the sound of your manager’s voice. Kyunghee Jung is a dark-haired woman in her late fifties, and she laughs when she sees your startled expression, her eyes crinkling at the corners. “Easy! You’ll spill your coffee if you’re not careful.”
“I’ll probably have a heart attack first,” you reply, pressing a hand to your chest. “What was your job before this? Some kind of intelligence operative? Are you a super spy?”
Kyunghee laughs again and joins you at the counter. “Nothing even remotely as exciting as that,” she answers, plopping her mug down beside yours. It’s decorated with what looks like every color of the rainbow, a massive smiling sunflower taking up the majority of the surface, and the only remnant of the ceramic’s original color is on the very edge of the handle where there’s a lopsided little patch of white. The piece is clearly handmade, and a stark contrast to the simple mint green cup that houses your coffee. Looking at it, it’s impossible not to smile.
“I love that,” you remark, inclining your head at her mug. “Was it a present from one of your kids?”
“Hoseok,” she confirms, running a fingertip along the imperfect handle fondly. “I’ve told you about him before—he’s right around your age.”
You chuckle. “Right, I remember. That’s why he’s the perfect match for me, right?”
“Come now, there’s more to it than that,” Kyunghee defends, waving a hand. “But yes, to answer your question. He gave it to me as a birthday present when he was eight.”
“Well, you never told me he was an artist,” you tease. “Does he have an Etsy? Can I buy one of these off him? Does he do custom orders, maybe?”
Normally, your manager is more than happy to play along with your jokes, but today Kyunghee fixes you with an uncharacteristically serious look. “Why don’t you ask him yourself?” she asks. “He’s coming to the holiday party, after all. I figured you could finally meet.”
You blink. Kyunghee has been making offhand remarks about how well you would get on with her son, Hoseok, for over a year now, but you’ve never even come close to broaching the topic of meeting him. You don’t even know anything about the man beyond the fact that his name is Hoseok and that he works somewhere downtown. He also favors tall socks and yellow suspenders if the framed photograph on Kyunghee’s desk is any indication—or at least, he certainly did when he was still in diapers. Whether he still does, is anyone’s guess.
“Wow, I had no idea he was even interested in coming,” you manage when you’ve recovered from your surprise. “Did you bribe him?”
If Kyunghee notices that your voice is a few pitches higher than usual, she doesn’t remark on it. “Oh, you know. I just told him that this would be his last chance to score free booze on the company’s dime.” She laughs. “Three more months and it’s going to be all beaches and sunshine for me. I might even become a cruise person in my retirement.”
You gasp and slap a hand to your heart. “Kyunghee! Think of the environmental impact!”
“I said I might!” she retorts immediately. “Sheesh. Even in my old age, it’s hard to conveniently forget how shitty and unsustainable those damn boats are.”
You pick up your mug and raise it in a salute. “Well, the oceans thank you.”
“My husband doesn’t,” she answers with a sigh. “He’s been dying to book one of those trips that stop all along the Mediterrannean coastline, and I can’t exactly blame him.”
“That is tempting,” you admit. “You’ll have to send photos, if you do end up going.”
“You’ll be sick of me and my photos before the first day is even up,” she promises. Then she pauses, her eyes darting toward the kitchen where silence has fallen in the last few minutes. “Speaking of being sick—you think the vultures are still hovering around in there? I haven’t had lunch yet, and I need the microwave.”
Obligingly, you edge a little closer to the kitchen doorway and poke your head around the frame, scanning for Lottie and her sidekicks. “Coast is clear. Enjoy your lunch, Kyunghee.”
She nods and raises her mug at you, returning your salute. “I always do.”
///
As soon as the work day ends, you fall into your usual routine. Your commute home is easily walkable on nicer days, and though the winter weather is brisker than you’d like, you decide to walk for the sake of stopping at the convenience store on the corner of the block.
Once you arrive back at your apartment, you change into your comfiest sweats and a loose tee. You turn on some music while you throw together some dinner, and settle onto the couch half an hour later with a full plate and Netflix. Television is a welcome distraction from the events of the workday, and you manage to get through three full episodes of your current show before your pesky brain decides to revisit the events of today, replaying the conversations that you’d both had and overheard.
There’s no denying that you’ve been single for quite some time now, and for the most part, it’s been by choice. Ever since graduating from university, you’ve chosen to focus more on your career, and it’s paid off both in terms of the important position you hold in your company and your above average salary. And yet, you can’t help but think back to the gossip you’d overheard earlier—about the supposed tragedy of being single and attending the upcoming holiday party alone. Your mind wanders to Kyunghee’s son, Hoseok, and how he’ll be in attendance this year. You wonder what he’s like, and whether he really is perfect for you, as Kyunghee seems to be so fond of mentioning.
And then your mind goes to Jay.
You met Jay two months ago, on a well-deserved night out after a hellish workweek. The bar was crowded, and the music coming from the neon dancefloor in the back was just loud enough to drown out your inhibitions. That, combined with the alcohol swimming through your system, made you bold. You sashayed your way across the dancefloor, dodging inebriated bodies and swaying limbs as you fixed your attention on the head of pale lavender hair and deliciously broad shoulders that awaits you just behind the bar counter. The bartender is nothing short of gorgeous, and you’ve thrown all caution to the wind. Sure, several other women are eyeing him like he’s their next meal—several men are, too—but you need another drink. And while he prepares it, you plan to flirt.
A lot.
The bar counter is sticky with spilled liquor, but you don’t pay that any mind as you lean across it, the wood digging into the narrow strip of exposed skin left by your cropped top. “Hi!” you call, and the bartender looks up from where he’s just finished pouring a round of shots for a group of raucous young men.
“Hi yourself,” he says, his pillowy lips stretching into an easy smile. “What can I get you?”
You pretend not to notice the way his eyes flicker down to the dip of your cleavage and instead put on the sultriest smile you are capable of mustering. “Vodka soda,” you tell him, injecting a bit of purr into your voice. “A bit of lemon too, if you have it.”
“Trust me, I have it,” he assures, his smile growing as he reaches for a clean glass and a clear bottle. “Name’s Jin, by the way. I’m here all night, if you need anything e—”
A loud clatter and the sound of breaking glass interrupts the rest of his sentence, and all eyes at the bar go to the source of the disturbance. Conversations stutter to a halt, and even the thumping bass of the music seems to dull. Jin darts to the other end of the bar, where you can see that one of several barstools has fallen to the ground. There’s a man on the ground as well, surrounded by shattered glass and spilled dark liquor, and your eyes widen when you realize that you know him.
And arguably, a little too well.
“Fuck,” you mutter under your breath. People are starting to lose interest in the spectacle, turning back to their own conversations and continuing on as if nothing had happened at all. The man is beginning to clamber to his feet, and a few people lend a helping hand as Jin begins barking out orders for everyone to step back so he can sweep up the broken glass. You seize upon the opportunity, latching on to the nearest arm and pulling them close so you can hide behind them. Vaguely, you’re aware of them sputtering in surprise, but you only have eyes for the man who had fallen off his stool, watching him carefully as he brushes himself off and tries to play it cool despite the sizable patch of whiskey soaking his white shirt.
“Hey, uh…” Your human shield is speaking. “Are you okay? You’re squeezing me pretty tight.”
That draws you out of your daze. Abashed, you loosen your grip on his arm and look up into his face, your throat going dry when you realize how handsome he is. His black hair is parted over his forehead, a stray strand falling into warm brown eyes set above a straight nose and an inviting mouth. There’s a freckle above his top lip, just shy of the center, and your inebriated brain wonders just what it would be like to kiss it.
“I, um—” You clear your throat and try again. “Sorry about that. I just didn’t want him to see me.”
Your newfound companion raises an eyebrow and glances over his shoulder at the drunk man, who is now being ushered out of the bar by his buddies. “You know that guy?”
You nod, cringing. “Yeah, his name’s Trent. I… may or may not have dated him for a few months last year.”
The man laughs out loud. “You dated a Trent?”
“What, like you’ve never made a questionable life choice?” you challenge. “Besides, you shouldn’t judge someone based on the sins of their parents. It’s not his fault they gave him a terrible name.”
“Sure, but it is on him for going along with it,” he replies with a shrug. “I would’ve changed my name as soon as I could if my parents had named me Trent. But hey, that’s just one man’s opinion.”
You laugh. “Okay then, Not-Trent.” Relinquishing your grip on his arm, you let your fingers graze his hand before pulling away entirely. “What do you say we continue this conversation over a drink?”
The man, whose name is decidedly not Trent, catches your fingers in his and gives them a gentle squeeze. “Happily.”
One drink turns into two, and then three. By the end of the hour, you are feeling pleasantly warm, the alcohol spreading through your veins like molasses and turning your surroundings into a hazy blur. The music has grown even louder, pounding against your eardrums, and you grab onto Not-Trent’s wrist as he sets his now-empty glass back down onto the counter.
“Do you wanna get out of here?” you ask, raising your voice to be heard over the thumping bassline. “I can’t even hear myself think.”
“The parking lot’s out back,” he suggests. “Why don’t we get some air?”
You nod and stand up on wobbly legs, cursing your decision to wear heels when you stumble into your companion. He steadies you with a gentle but firm hand, and you don’t miss the way his touch lingers on your lower back, his palm warm through the material of your blouse.
Together, the two of you pick your way through the throng of swaying bodies on the dancefloor. The bassline thuds in your ears, dark and hypnotic, and you can feel the reverberations thrumming across the slats of your ribs and echoing in the cavern of your chest like a second heartbeat.
It’s almost a relief, then, when you step out into the cool night air. Your ears continue to ring for a few seconds, but it soon fades and leaves behind only the muted hum of traffic from the street and the faint sound of music from inside. At your side, Not-Trent releases a long breath and leans against the brick wall of the building, and you turn to take in the steep slopes of his side profile as he tilts his head up toward the velvety night sky.
He’s handsome. Dressed in ripped jeans and black leather, he’s a sight to behold, and you’d be lying if you said you hadn’t been craving a bit of intimacy for quite some time now. The alcohol swimming through your system makes you bolder than you normally would be, and you reach out to lay a hand on his arm. He turns toward you with a silent question glimmering in his irises, but you simply step closer, until you’re pinning him against the wall with your body and you’re breathing the same air.
“Hey,” you say, your voice an airy whisper. His eyes are near obsidian in the dimness of the parking lot, illuminated only by the orange glow of the streetlamps on either end, and your gaze flickers down to his mouth before roving to the freckle that sits upon his top lip. “Kiss me?”
Your companion’s eyes widen. His lips part, but no words come out, and you’re about to repeat your question when he finally finds his voice again.
“That’s really… that’s not a good idea.” Awkwardly, he clears his throat, but the hoarseness of his voice and the harsh bob of his Adam’s apple give away his true desires. “Look, you’ve been drinking. We both have, and—”
You cut him off, pushing up to your tiptoes and planting a messy kiss to the soft dip just beneath his bottom lip. “Don’t care,” you mumble against his skin. “I want you.”
Your companion laughs weakly. His hands find their way to your waist and pause there, as if he can’t decide whether to push you away or pull you closer. “You don’t even know me,” he murmurs.
“I don’t have to know you,” you reply. Your fingers drag down his chest, trailing along the delicate silver necklace that rests against the black of his shirt. From the chain hangs a round pendant, the surface engraved with the letter J. Slowly, you trace it with a fingertip, the metal shining even in the dim light, and satisfaction blooms in your heart when your companion’s throat bobs again. “I want you,” you breathe, soft but insistent. “Isn’t that enough?”
“I—” He clears his throat and tries again, and you wonder if he realizes that his hands have slid down to your hips, or that there’s a growing hardness against your lower stomach that’s becoming increasingly harder to ignore. “Look, I’m flattered—really, I am. And you’re… I mean, fuck, you’re gorgeous. But I don’t think we should do anything when you’re clearly not in the right frame of mind to be making this kind of decision, and—”
“And, nothing.” You wind your arms around his neck, pressing close and grinding subtly against the bulge in his pants. You smirk when he releases a low hiss from between his teeth, and hide it by laying a trail of kisses along the stretch of bare skin exposed by the dip of his collar. “Stop being such a gentleman,” you whisper. Your fingers trail down his chest, past the silver of his pendant and down to the faded denim of his jeans, teasing at the cool metal of his belt buckle. “I want this. But if you’re not interested, I can always go back in there and—”
The rest of your sentence dies in your throat. Your companion has tugged you flush against him in one smooth motion, and your gasp is cut off by the firm press of his mouth against yours. Immediately, you melt into the kiss, and a moan tears from your lips when he spins you around and pins you against the brick wall of the building.
“You’re a spoiled little thing, huh?” His breath fans hot against your cheeks, and you shiver when you meet his eyes and see the dark promise reflected there. “Used to getting what you want, huh, princess?”
Your breath hitches at the endearment—something your companion doesn’t miss. “Oh, you like that?” He chuckles hoarsely, and when he speaks again it’s in a rasp that sends heat straight to your core. “What else do you like, hmm? You want me to be rough with you, princess? Or should I be gentle and treat you like a queen?”
You reach up, raking your fingers through his hair and skimming across the soft strands of his undercut before finding purchase at his nape. “You talk too much,” you whisper.
And then you’re crushing your mouth back against his, whining when he immediately takes back control of the kiss. His grip slides downward, his fingertips digging into the skin just above the curve of your ass, and you squeak when he grabs the back of your thigh and hooks your leg around his waist.
“You feel that?” he rasps into your ear, nipping at the delicate shell and chortling when you keen. Your skirt has ridden up dangerously high on your spread thighs, and you let out a soft whimper when he grinds harshly against your center. The lace of your panties and the denim of his jeans are the last barricades between you, and you wonder, vaguely, whether your companion has a bit of an exhibitionist streak when he slides one of your sleeves down your shoulder and begins kissing a trail down to the swell of your cleavage. “You feel how hard you’ve gotten me?”
You lean down, kissing the soft spot where his jaw meets his ear before letting your teeth graze against his skin. “Why don’t you do something about it then?”
He hisses out a sharp breath, his hands tightening their hold on your hips. “You’ve got quite the mouth on you, huh? I can’t wait to make you eat your words.”
Any retort you may have had is interrupted by a sudden swell of music and the sound of a slamming door. Whirling to face the source of the noise, you immediately spot a familiar head of lavender hair atop broad shoulders encapsulated in the black uniform of the bar. Jin hasn’t noticed the two of you yet, his attention fixated on his cell phone screen, but he looks up when you let out a little squeak of surprise and shove your companion’s chest in an attempt to create some distance between you.
“Hey.” Jin raises a hand in greeting, a knowing smirk curling his lips. “This phone call shouldn’t be too long, so please. Don’t stop the party on my behalf.”
Heat floods to your cheeks. There isn’t much use protesting against his insinuation, considering the rather compromising position you’re in. Much to your relief, though, your companion simply huffs out a chuckle and waves Jin off. “Thanks, man, but we’ll get out of your hair.” Lowering his voice, he turns back to you. “Coming, princess?”
You nod. He offers you his hand, and you take it gratefully, adjusting your skirt so that it drapes properly over your hips and thighs again.
“Have a good night!” Jin calls after you, amusement lacing every word. You can’t work up the nerve to respond, and luckily, you don’t have to. Your companion leads you around the corner of the building, where several rows of cars are parked beneath an orange streetlamp. On this side, the exterior brick wall is painted with a mural, and you admire the colorful galaxies and nebulae swirling amidst silvery white stars and the word serendipity spray-painted in pale blue.
The last car in the row is parked just beneath the letter Y, and it’s here that your companion stops. The sleek black vehicle has an almost vintage feel to it, and you glance up when you hear the jingle of metal.
“I’m guessing this is yours?”
He nods, pulling a set of keys from the pocket of his leather jacket and inserting one into the lock. “Yeah. You like it?”
“It’s beautiful,” you tell him, tracing the edge of the passenger window “Makes my car look like a total piece of shit by comparison.”
Your companion chuckles, pulling open the driver’s side door, and you catch a glimpse of your reflection in the window as he presses a button to unlock the rest of the doors. Your hair’s a bit of a mess and your mascara has smudged beneath your right eye, and you hurriedly swipe at it as your companion turns his attention back to you.
“So,” he says. “Now what? I can give you a ride home, if you want.”
Deliberately, you let your gaze drop down to his crotch, where his bulge—albeit waning—is still visible. “Seriously? I thought you were going to… what was it again? Make me eat my words?”
And just like that, it’s as if a switch has flipped. His eyes darken to obsidian, his lips settling into a stern line, and you barely have time to draw in a breath before he’s caging you against the side of his car and molding his mouth to yours. Your lips part beneath the onslaught, and he wastes no time in dipping inside to explore, licking into you until you’re both breathless.
“Inside,” he breathes once you’ve broken apart, and you instantly obey. You wrench the door open and all but tumble into the backseat, and he isn’t far behind as he slots himself between your spread thighs. Your hands fly to his shoulders where you help him shuck off his leather jacket, tossing it carelessly to the front where it lands in a heap on the dashboard before focusing your attention on the hem of his black t-shirt. Your companion obliges you as you push it upward to expose his toned abdomen, grabbing it by the collar and pulling it off the rest of the way when your reach falls a little short in the cramped interior of the backseat.
“Your turn,” he whispers when you try to reach for his belt, his hands settling around your wrists. “It’s only fair, princess.”
Pouting, you let your hands fall limp in his grasp, and he chuckles as he leans down to pacify you with a kiss. Deft fingers find the hem of your blouse, pushing it up until you can twist out of the material. You throw it aside with no regard for where it lands on the ground, and lay back as your companion drinks you in, his dark gaze raking across the lacy black lingerie that decorates your curves and skims you like a second skin. “Fuck,” he breathes, his voice hoarse with a combination of amazement and disbelief. “You’re stunning.”
You smile, trailing a fingertip from the dip of his collarbone down to the silver necklace that sits prettily against his bare chest. “You’re not so bad yourself,” you tell him, tracing the letter engraved into his pendant. “Jay.”
Your companion—newly dubbed Jay—smiles back. “You’re something else, princess,” he murmurs, before leaning down to kiss you again. He explores your mouth thoroughly—languidly—before moving down to nip at your neck, and already, you can feel the beginnings of marks beginning to form, blossoming across your skin as irrefutable proof of your tryst.
It isn’t long before Jay frees you from your bra, watching with carnal fascination as your breasts spill out of the lacy material. You whine when he reaches out to cup one, his palm hot against your bare skin, and he smirks crookedly when a pinch to your nipple makes your back arch off the leather of the seat. “So pretty,” he rasps. “I can’t wait to see how you look stretched around my cock.”
“Stop waiting, then,” you tell him, trying again for his belt buckle. This time, he lets you fumble it open, leaning back to watch you work with hooded eyes and a lazy little smile. Emboldened, you push aside the denim of his jeans and free his cock from the confines of his underwear. He’s hard and hot and heavy in your palm, and your tongue darts out instinctively at the sight of the pearlescent precum beading the tip.
“Jay,” you murmur, thumbing across the head of his erection and smirking when he hisses in pleasure. “Fuck me.”
Jay seems to consider your demand, mischief flitting across his features before he manages to school his expression into something more neutral. “Where are your manners, princess?” he asks, pushing your hand away and giving himself a few long, slow strokes. “Say please, if you want it so bad.”
For a moment, you consider refusing. Jay seems to be the type of man who enjoys a good game, but between the state of his cock and the earlier interruption, you’re pretty sure he’s nearing his limit. And even if he isn’t, you are. And so, you shelve your pride for the time being, and trail a hand down the length of your bared body as you bat your lashes up at him. “Fuck me, Jay,” you repeat. “Please. Want your cock so bad.”
His answering smile is equal parts amusement and satisfaction, and altogether sinful. “That’s my girl,” he rasps, before shoving your panties aside. Lining the head of his cock up, he enters you in one smooth thrust, and you moan as your walls stretch to accommodate his girth. You’re more than wet enough to take him in his entirety, your eyes fluttering shut when he bottoms out, and he groans hoarsely as he takes a second to relish the feeling of your walls gripping him so tightly.
“Fuck. You’re so wet, princess.” Jay dips a thumb into your slick, spreading it across your clit and rubbing a few experimental circles around the sensitive nub. He groans when you clench around him, his hips stuttering, and you squeeze around him again just to hear him grit out another curse. “Shit. I’m not going to last long at this rate.”
“Don’t care,” you murmur, rocking against him and sighing when the motion sends him a little deeper into your core. “Just fuck me, Jay. Please.”
Jay leans in, a dark lock of hair falling across his forehead as he plants an indulgent kiss on your waiting mouth. “Anything for you, princess,” he breathes. Slowly, he pulls back until only the tip of his cock remains inside you. Then he’s slamming forward, and you can’t even find it in yourself to care about the obscene sound of skin slapping against skin or the way the car rocks. Jay’s thumbing across your clit in tight circles that he times perfectly with the rock of his hips, and you wonder whether the rapidly building pleasure in your belly is due to your dry spell or if he’s just that good. You can feel every inch of him as he fills you up repeatedly, his brows furrowed in concentration and his dark hair flopping as he drives deeper in search of the spot that will have you seeing stars.
You know he’s found it when the pleasure in your belly spikes, your back arching off the backseat. Your skin is sticky against the dark leather and you’re certain the sweat gathering at your temples has destroyed the last of your makeup, but Jay alleviates your concerns with a particularly well-timed thrust and a harsh nip to the soft spot at your clavicle. You keen out something unintelligible, and his lips stretch into a smirk against your skin.
“That’s it,” he encourages. “Cum for me, princess.”
That’s all it takes for the mounting pressure to snap. Your body collapses into a searing orgasm, the pleasure flaring out like a supernova and spreading through your veins like wildfire. “F-fuck, Jay—” you gasp, your fingers scrabbling at his back for purchase and no doubt leaving scratches in their wake. “Fuck, you feel so—”
The remainder of your words trail off into garbled nonsense, and Jay huffs out a strained chuckle as he begins chasing after his own orgasm, rutting against you in a way that both prolongs your pleasure and sustains his own. “Shit,” he groans, his eyes fluttering shut. “Fuck, that’s it. Look at you—taking my cock so well. So pretty and perfect and—”
Whatever he was going to say dissolves into a groan as he gives a few more erratic thrusts before his release overwhelms him. Creamy warmth floods through you, and you rub his back tiredly as his head drops onto your shoulder, his breath flaring hot against your skin as he rides out his orgasm.
It takes several long seconds for the pleasure to recede. Your legs are still shaky when Jay pulls away, straightening up and tucking himself back into his jeans. There’s an empty ache in your core now that you are no longer stuffed full of his cock, and already, you are missing the feeling. Still, you push that aside as you sit up, adjusting your panties and wincing at the wetness that soaks the material and sticks to your skin.
“So,” Jay says after a moment’s silence, and you glance over at him when he huffs out a short chuckle. “That was fun.”
“Not bad at all,” you agree weakly, an irrepressible smile tugging at your lips.
Jay grins. It’s a bright, infectious grin—and it’s one that you’ve already grown rather fond of in the short period of time you’ve known him. It’s a grin that showcases his perfect teeth and crinkles his eyes into crescents, and one that all but forces you to grin back.
“Here, give me your phone,” he says, and you watch as he punches in his number once you hand it over. “Just in case you ever wanna do this again,” he tells you, handing it back. “Don’t be a stranger, princess.”
You glance down at his contact information, saved under the moniker you’d given him and affixed with a short string of emojis. “I won’t,” you tell him, chuckling. “In fact, I just might take you up on the offer.”
-
The screen of your laptop has long since gone dark, and you stretch your arms overhead before waking it again. Rolling your shoulders, you navigate back to the main Netflix menu, hovering over the resume button and watching the trailer loop in the background.
You’d be lying if you said you didn’t think about Jay often. You’ve texted each other quite often since that night in his car—usually when you’re bored and alone and have had a few too many glasses of wine in the evenings. You’ve found yourself tapping on his name instinctively during those odd, ambiguous hours—when late night and early morning meld together and you’re aching for a bit of relief.
And as if he knows you’re thinking about him, your phone buzzes against the coffee table, the screen lighting up with a familiar name.
[11:22pm] Jay 😘🍆💦: thinkin about u, pretty girl 😘
It’s followed by an image, and your heart rate picks up, thudding loudly against your ribs as you open it.
Fuck.
Your memories of Jay’s face—made all the more hazy by the alcohol and the amount of time elapsed since your first and only meeting—truly don’t do him justice. Though the photograph cuts off just above his nose, you can still admire the sharp angle of his jaw and the fullness of his puckered lips. His skin is golden against the white of his t-shirt, and you lick your lips before thumbing across your screen to respond.
[11:23pm] You: yeah? what else are you thinking about, hmm?
His response is instantaneous.
[11:23pm] Jay 😘🍆💦: thinking about that pretty little pussy of yours
[11:23pm] Jay 😘🍆💦: how good it looked in that pic u sent me tuesday 👅
You barely even notice the way your hand begins trailing down your body, pushing aside the elastic waistband of your sweats. It’s as if you’re on autopilot, as your fingers find their way to the damp spot growing on your panties.
Yeah? you write back with your free hand, already teasing at your clothed folds with the other. Tell me more.
///
It’s an uncharacteristically warm Friday morning when you find yourself in the elevator with Jimin, a good friend of yours who works on one of the lower levels of your office building. “Morning,” he says as he steps in, a large iced coffee in hand despite the fact that it’s still very much the middle of winter. Then he squints, leaning a little closer. “Oh my god. You got laid!”
“Oh my god, not so loud!” you hiss, whacking him on the shoulder and jabbing the button to close the elevator doors. “And no, not exactly. I’ve just been texting Jay.”
“Texting, sure.” Jimin mimes air quotes around the word and rolls his eyes. “You’re sexting him, and we all know it. How many pictures of his dick do you have saved on your phone now?”
“Oh my—” You sigh, trailing off. “Can we not talk about this right now?”
“Right, of course.” Jimin takes a sip of his coffee and pretends to check his watch. “When would you like to talk about it then? Do you need to check your calendar? Can I book an appointment for later this afternoon?”
You stick your tongue out at him. “Shut up.”
Jimin just grins, his lips puckered around his straw. “So, how’s Jay? Have you asked for his real name yet?”
You shrug. “What’s the point? It’s not like we’re friends or anything. We’ve literally only met the one time.”
“Yeah, but that’s just because you’re a coward,” Jimin points out. “What’s stopping you from meeting up with him again? You have his number. You have at least one photo of his dick. Ask him out already!”
“It’s not that easy, though,” you sigh. The elevator doors open to let a few more people in, and you move to the side and lower your voice so that only Jimin can hear. “Jay—he’s not exactly boyfriend material. I mean, we fucked in his car the first night we met.”
“So?” Jimin frowns and takes another sip of his iced coffee. “You talk about things besides sex, don’t you? You definitely told him about your goldfish dying, at least. I mean, you told him before you even told me!”
“Yes I did, and he was appropriately sympathetic about Mustache’s passing, unlike some people,” you sniff. “Get over it already, won’t you?”
“Never,” Jimin replies, ignoring your pointed jab. “I’m sure you only told him because you knew you could get a sympathy sext out of it. How many dick pics did you get out of that night, anyway?”
“You’re gross,” you tell him, punching him in the arm. “Not to mention that’s exactly why Jay’s not boyfriend material. He’s perfectly happy with—whatever it is we’re doing. I can’t just ruin that by asking him to get dinner.” You frown, gnawing on your bottom lip. “I don’t want to make this into something that it’s not.”
Jimin hesitates. “Fine, okay. I guess I can understand that.”
“Yeah.”
There’s a pause, as the elevator makes a few more stops. You watch the numbers crawl higher, and know that you’ll soon have to part ways with your friend..
“Hey.” You nudge Jimin with your shoulder, just as the elevator doors close and you begin the ascent to his floor. “Wanna know something interesting?”
Jimin looks up from his phone, where he’s scrolling through Twitter. “Always.”
“My boss’ son is coming to the party tomorrow.”
Jimin’s eyebrows disappear into his ashy blond hair at your revelation. “Kyunghee’s son? Hoseok, or whatever?”
You chuckle. “The one and only. She’s found about a million ways to bring him up in conversation this past week. She thinks we’re a match made in heaven.”
“Wow.” Jimin releases a long breath. “I wonder what he’s like, then.”
You shrug, adjusting the strap of your work tote over your shoulder. “I guess we’ll find out, won’t we?”
///
The morning of the party, you wake up to an empty refrigerator. Half stale cereal and the last dregs of milk from the carton become your breakfast, and you munch on that as you mull over the contents of your closet. You’re still in your pajamas, but you pull out your comfiest jeans and a sweater to change into after you finish eating. Then you turn to your collection of dresses, rifling through them and mentally debating the merits of each material and color.
You could go in one of two directions tonight. On the one hand, this is still a work party, and as such your attire should probably maintain a certain level of decorum. But on the other, you’re meeting Hoseok Jung for the first time tonight. You aren’t necessarily looking to start anything with the man, of course, but you do want to look good. With that in mind, you eventually settle on a deep red number that you pull out of the very back of your closet, made of a silky material that skims your curves and accentuates your best assets. Laying it on the bed, you begin your hunt for a pair of matching shoes. Twenty minutes of searching and another five of agonizing later, you step into the bathroom, intent on showering and getting on with the rest of your day.
Upon exiting the bathroom, you decide that tackling the state of your refrigerator takes top priority over your other weekend errands. Sitting down at the dining table, you take stock of what you have in your pantry, planning out your meals for the upcoming week and making a list of what you need to purchase in order to make them a reality. It’s just after one in the afternoon when you exit your apartment with a completed grocery list and your purse stuffed full of reusable canvas bags. The store is a short walk from where you live, and you decide to put in your earbuds as your feet navigate the familiar route. The temperature is surprisingly mild for winter, and the sun shines bright from its perch in the cloudless blue sky. It’s perfect weather for a walk, and the fresh air clears your mind and eases your heart.
At the grocery store, you forego the stack of baskets and instead grab a shopping cart. Weaving your way up and down the aisles, you check items off the list on your phone one by one. Eventually, you find yourself in the cereal section, grabbing a box of granola before turning to where your favorite cereal normally sits. It isn’t there, and you turn in a full circle, confused, until your gaze finally lands on the familiar box on the top shelf.
Great.
Sighing, you push up to your tiptoes, stretching your arm as far as it can reach. Your fingertips graze the shelf, but you can’t quite get a grip on the box itself. Glancing down, you scan the bottommost shelf and wonder if you can step on it to give yourself a boost.
“Need a hand?”
The voice comes from behind you, and a vague sense of familiarity sparks in your brain. Slowly, you turn around, and your entire body freezes when your gaze slides up to the speaker’s face.
“Jay.” The syllable escapes you in a near whisper. “H-hi.”
“Hey.”
Jay stands before you, looking like sin incarnate in a faded denim jacket, black sweatpants slung low on his hips, and not much else. At his throat, his silver necklace sparkles, the silver J pendant glinting beneath the fluorescent lights of the store, and you’re suddenly beyond grateful that you decided to put on a decent sweater before leaving.
“Here,” he says, stepping forward until he’s close enough that you can smell his cologne—sandalwood tinged with sweet citrus. “Let me help you with that.”
The sudden proximity has your breath hitching in your throat. Your heart thuds erratically against your ribs as he reaches around you, the denim flaps of his jacket gaping in a way that exposes even more of his bare chest. By the time he pulls back with your cereal box in hand, you feel almost faint, belatedly realizing that you’d been holding your breath.
“You wanted this, right?” Jay asks, and you aren’t sure if you’re imagining the innuendo underlying his words or the teasing inflection of the syllables.
“Y-yeah, that’s the one,” you manage, fighting to quell the uneven tempo of your heartbeat as you accept the box. “Thanks.”
“Happy to help,” he replies. Then he leans in, close enough that you can feel his warm breath fanning your cheek as he murmurs his next sentence into your ear. “Anything for you, princess. You know that.”
Heat floods across your cheeks. Your heart skips two full beats before taking off into a sprint, and it’s impossible to ignore the way your core begins to thrum, as if anticipating a repeat of that night you first met all those weeks ago. Almost instinctively, your eyes dart up to the ceiling where the security cameras are, and Jay follows the trajectory of your gaze with a low chuckle and a soft brush of your cheek with the pad of his thumb.
“Sorry, princess. As much as I’d love to get my hands on you, I’m kind of on a time crunch today.”
You can’t stop the wave of disappointment that washes over you, even if you’re in the exact same boat. “Rain check, then?”
“Rain check,” he agrees. Slowly, you reach up to touch the engraved silver pendant resting against his chest, rubbing it between your fingertips before tracing the curve of the J, and he catches your wandering fingers between his and presses a gentle kiss to your knuckles.
“You know how to reach me,” he murmurs with a mischievous wink. His gaze lingers even after he’s released your hand, and you clear your throat awkwardly before turning to deposit your cereal box into your shopping cart.
The two of you go your separate ways then, exchanging goodbyes. You finish the rest of your grocery shopping in a daze, idly going through the motions at checkout and letting muscle memory guide you back home. Your arms are aching by the time you step past the threshold of your apartment, and you heave your shopping bags up onto the kitchen counter with a relieved sigh before returning to the entryway to toe off your shoes. You throw together a sandwich as you unpack your groceries, taking a big bite as you walk back to your bedroom to look at the dress you’ve picked out. Pacing over to the closet, you double-check your shoe choice. Briefly, you debate whether or not to wear flats instead of heels.
There are still a few hours left before you have to start getting ready, so you take the last of your sandwich back to the kitchen and whip up a smoothie to go with it. You scroll through your phone as you eat, browsing through the latest news headlines and scrolling through your social media accounts. Just before six o’clock, as the sun starts setting beyond the horizon and casting long shadows across your living room, you start getting changed. You snap a photo in the mirror once you’re dressed, pulling up Jimin’s name in your phone and sending it to him.
[6:13pm] You: last chance to come tonight
Your phone buzzes with a response almost immediately.
[6:14pm] Jimin: nah. i’d hate to step on hoseok’s toes.
You laugh. Not so fast, you text back. We don’t even know anything about the guy yet. What if he’s boring? Or sexist?
[6:15pm] Jimin: if u think kyunghee raised a sexist you’re seriously deranged
[6:16pm] Jimin: now stop taking selfies and get your ass out the door! you’re gonna be late!!!!
///
Each year, the holiday party tends to be a little over the top, and this year is no exception. The company has bought out the entirety of a restaurant for the evening, and you glance around in amazement at the twinkling lights and lush evergreen boughs decorating the walls and strung up along the ceiling. An assortment of sparkling ornaments hangs from the massive tree in the far corner, interspersed between silver tinsel and more lights. Grabbing a champagne flute off a passing server’s tray, you head farther into the restaurant, skirting around tables draped in creamy linen and greeting your colleagues and friends.
“Is she alone?”
“Figures.”
The voices come from the direction of the open bar, and somehow, you just know that they’re talking about you. Lottie, Hyejin, and Sandra are clustered in the corner with glasses of wine in hand, casting glances around the restaurant and gossiping about anything and everything with a pulse. You’re sorely tempted to grab the nearest pitcher of water off a table and pour it over their heads, but you suppress the urge and instead head over with a saccharine smile. “So lovely to see you, {Name},” Lottie says as you approach.
“I love your dress,” Sandra adds. “Very slimming.”
“Thanks,” you reply, putting on your brightest, fakest smile. “Yours is great too. How are you and your husband enjoying the party so far?”
Sandra’s face sours, and you hide your smirk in your champagne flute. Maybe it’s petty to bring up her rocky relationship, but you’ve been subject to snide comments from Sandra and her friends for years now and it’s become increasingly hard for you to bite your tongue. A few tables away, you spot Sandra’s husband, Rodney, take an enormous gulp of his whiskey and wince as it burns down his throat.
“We’re all having a wonderful time, aren’t we, ladies?” Lottie cuts in when Sandra takes too long to answer. “Hyejin’s date is over there with Rodney, and my boyfriend is fetching himself a drink. You remember Dev, don’t you?”
You nod, even though it’s a lie. “Sure. Say hi to him for me.”
Lottie’s lips curve up into a smile, her head tilting to the side, and you’re suddenly reminded of a snake rearing its head back for the kill. “So, what about you? Have you brought someone tonight, or—?”
“Hi ladies!” Kyunghee materializes at your side, her lips painted a festive red shade to match her dress. She’s wearing the disingenuous smile that she reserves for the resident gossips of your office, and you try not to let your relief show on your face when Lottie’s attention refocuses on your manager.
“So good to see you, Kyunghee,” she simpers. “Have you been here long?”
“Not as long as you,” your manager replies, nodding at the near-empty wineglass in her hand. “I see we’re already making a dent in the wine supply, and you’re falling behind, {Name}. Why don’t we go remedy that, hmm?”
She doesn’t give you a chance to respond, grabbing your arm and leading you away. Kyunghee is surprisingly spry for a woman her age, and you follow after her with some difficulty as she marches through the throngs of conversing people, all the way to the line at the open bar.
“I’d like you to meet someone,” she says, gesturing at the man standing at the end of the line with his back to you. “{Name}, this is my son, Hoseok.”
The man turns around at the sound of his name, a warm, affable smile stretched across his face. “Hi, I’m H—” he begins, but he’s cut off by your sharp intake of breath. His eyes go wide, his smile fading as his mouth falls open, and you’re certain you’re wearing an even more dumbfounded expression. “It’s you,” he says, his voice hoarse.
“Wh-what… how…” You trail off, speechless. The words flounder and die in your throat as your brain struggles to process this development, and you practically feel the way the gears in your head churn to a stuttering halt.
Because this man standing before you, the one that Kyunghee has just introduced as her son, is none other than Jay. He looks completely and utterly devastating in a navy waistcoat and matching slacks, a green tie shaped like a Christmas tree knotted loosely around the white collar of his shirt. His dark hair is parted, his undercut exposed, and you can’t tear your gaze away from the loose strand that has fallen across his forehead.
“H-hi.”
Jay—Hoseok—swallows. “Hi.”
Kyunghee glances between the two of you, her brows furrowing. “I take it you two already know each other?”
Hoseok’s ears begin taking on a scarlet tinge, the color spreading to his cheeks as he struggles to find his vocabulary again. “I—yeah. Yeah, we’ve met.”
“Right. Do I even want to know how?” she asks dubiously, before shaking her head and huffing out a sigh. “No, forget I asked. I don’t want to know. I’ll just leave you two to… catch up.”
Waving goodbye, Kyunghee disappears back into the crowd of partygoers milling around. Hoseok turns back to you, sucking in a deep breath, and you fight the urge to stare down at your toes as his gaze roves across your face.
“I can’t believe this,” he says, breaking the silence that’s fallen between you at last. “My mom’s been talking about you for months, but I never imagined that it’d be you.”
“You’re telling me,” you reply, finally having recovered your voice. “Kyunghee brings you up all the time, but I never thought… I mean, we didn’t even know each other’s names, and now…” You shrug. “Here we both are.”
“It’s a pretty crazy coincidence, huh?”
“Definitely.”
A beat passes, and then two. You’re fully aware that you’re staring, but you don’t dare blink, afraid that he’ll disappear if you close your eyes. Of all the things that you thought might happen tonight, this particular meeting wasn’t even close to making the list. Never would you have thought that the man you only knew as Jay would turn out to be Kyunghee’s son. Never would you have connected Jay to the photographed little boy in yellow suspenders on Kyunghee’s desk, or realized that they were one and the same.
From behind you, someone loudly clears their throat. Another voice calls for you to get a move on, already, and both you and Hoseok belatedly realize that you are still standing in line for the open bar. Hoseok’s eyes go wide again, and you nearly tread on his toes when you both try to move forward. “After you,” he says with a chuckle, gesturing for you to go in front of him, and that’s enough to break the tension. You step ahead of him with a laugh, catching up to the line, and Hoseok doesn’t stray far as he follows your lead.
“So, what are you drinking?” he asks, a smile playing at the corner of his lips. “Vodka soda with a twist?”
“Actually, I think I’m going to stick with wine tonight,” you reply, peering at the bottles lined up on the counter. “What about you?”
“Hmm. Jack and coke, I think. Nothing else is really calling my name right now.”
Grabbing your drinks, the two of you begin searching for a place to sit. You spot Kyunghee at a table near the front, and she smiles knowingly and offers you a thumbs-up when she catches your eye. Eventually, you settle on a table near the Christmas tree, the lights glimmering off the glasses and reflecting off your knife as you pick it up to butter a slice of crusty bread from the basket in the center. Hoseok follows your lead, grabbing a piece for himself, and the two of you munch in silence for a few seconds before Hoseok breaks it.
“You know, my mom says you’re the perfect girl for me” he says with a dry little chuckle. “Think she’s right?”
“I don’t know,” you answer. “It’s funny, though—Kyunghee’s been telling me the same thing. She sings your praises all the time.”
Hoseok laughs and scratches the back of his neck. “Oh, jeez, that’s kind of embarrassing. I’m glad she’s saying good things, at least.”
“You don’t have to worry about that,” you tell him, grinning. “She’s only shown us one photo album from your childhood.”
His face crumples. “Was it the Disneyland one?”
You nod, fighting back laughter, and watch as Hoseok groans and lets his forehead meet the linen-covered tabletop with a dull thunk.
“I don’t like rollercoasters,” he mumbles into the tablecloth, his voice muffled by the material. “They make me queasy.”
“Even now?” you ask, and he nods.
“Yep.”
The clinking of a fork against a wineglass—amplified and broadcast through an array of invisible speakers built into the restaurant’s walls—interrupts any further conversation. You twist in your seat to watch your company’s leadership give their opening remarks, listening as they congratulate everyone for a great year and wish you a happy holiday season. The servers begin going out with plates of food, and you thank them as they set yours down. Hoseok does the same before raising his glass in your direction, clearing his throat and offering you a crooked little smile.
“Here’s to second meetings.”
“Third, if you count the store earlier,” you correct, and he chuckles and nods in agreement before clinking his drink against yours.
You spend the entirety of dinner chatting with Hoseok, getting to know him beyond the few facts Kyunghee has mentioned and what little you’ve gleaned from texting him the last two months. He tells you all about his dance studio, Hope World, where he teaches both contemporary dance and the occasional Pilates class. You find out that in addition to rollercoasters, he also dislikes sour foods and raisins, but he loves mint chocolate and sweet and sour pork. He also has a very low tolerance for alcohol—something he tells you as he tilts the rest of his drink into his mouth. “Should I be worried?” you ask as he sets his glass back down, and he chuckles and shakes his head, sending the loose tendril of hair flopping across his forehead.
Dessert is served, and subsequently eaten. The music is turned up, and people slowly begin finding their way to the open space that serves as an impromptu dancefloor. Hoseok rises to his feet and extends a hand toward you, and you only hesitate for the briefest of seconds before accepting it. He leads you out amongst the other swaying couples, his hand finding its way to the curve of your waist, and you rest your hand on his shoulder as he begins guiding you in a slow, simple waltz.
“So?” Hoseok’s voice is a low murmur, soft and gentle against the shell of your ear. “What’s the verdict?”
You blink. “The verdict?”
Even without looking, you can tell that he’s smiling. You can hear it in the lilt of his voice, and imagine it in the curve of his lips. “About me,” he clarifies, carefully pulling back so you can spin in a circle beneath his outstretched arm. “About us. My mom will never let me hear the end of it if she turns out to be right, but I still wanna know. So what are you thinking?”
“Are you asking if I think we’re perfect for each other?” you ask, giggling. “I don’t know if I believe in all that, to be quite honest. Destiny and soulmates—I mean, doesn’t it seem a little too good to be true?”
Hoseok hums. “Maybe. But considering all that’s happened to us in the last couple of months, don’t you think there’s a chance that it's all more than simple coincidence?”
“Maybe,” you concede. “Still, I don’t know if I can give you a verdict just yet. We haven’t even gone on a date.”
“We did do things a little backwards,” Hoseok admits, tugging you close and winding his arm around your waist. “Let me make it up to you, then. Are you free tomorrow?”
“What if I am?” you challenge.
“Then, I’d like to take you out for breakfast,” he replies without missing a beat.
The prospect of a proper meal with Hoseok Jung does something funny to your insides. Still, something makes you hesitate, and you avert your gaze as you search for your next words. “I wasn’t expecting to end tonight with a date,” you admit slowly. “I honestly didn’t even think you were interested in… well, anything beyond sex, to be honest.”
Hoseok’s face creases into a frown, and you look up again when he murmurs your name. “I understand why you would think that,” he says. “Really, I do. But honestly? I had every intention of texting you and asking you out properly. I was going to play it cool and wait a few days, which was stupid in retrospect. And then you texted me first.”
“I texted y—” You trail off. “Oh, god.”
“It seemed like you’d been drinking,” Hoseok says with a shrug, and you press a finger to his lips before he can say anything more. You remember the night in question, and you remember the bottle of wine you’d consumed. And you definitely remember the photographs you’d sent of yourself, and the ones Hoseok had been kind enough to send in return.
“Wait, so you were going to ask me out? And then I… I sexted you?”
Hoseok nods, and you groan and bury your face into his chest.
“I can’t believe this,” you mutter, and you feel laughter rumble through his chest before a hand comes up to stroke along your back.
“Believe me, I’m not complaining,” he assures you. “But I’d still really like to take you out, so what do you say?”
His gaze doesn’t leave yours for a second as he awaits your answer, and your heart skips a beat when you look up to see the earnestness in his eyes and the hesitant smile playing at the corners of his mouth. “Breakfast sounds wonderful,” you whisper, and the smile that blossoms on your companion’s face is nothing short of radiant.
“Good,” he says. “Great. Breakfast tomorrow, then. Now, can I kiss you?”
You’re already pushing up to your tiptoes, your fingers fisting in the soft hair at his nape. “God, yes.”
///
“Hey, you made it!”
You beam. “Hi.”
You and Hoseok are about to commence your first date, having just sat down at a cozy little café for breakfast. Hoseok has pulled your chair out in true gentlemanly fashion, and you can’t help but smile over your menu at the few lingering snowflakes that have yet to melt into his dark hair.
“So, here we are,” you remark. “Our fourth meeting.”
Hoseok’s lips stretch into his signature grin, breathtakingly bright and infectious. “And hopefully many more.”
You grin at him. “Yeah? Too bad this is breakfast, because I’d drink to that.”
He leans forward, his grin widening. “Next time,” he says as his hand finds its way around yours, his fingers slotting comfortably into the spaces between your own. “We can do dinner, maybe. Or I can cook for you. But for now, I’m just happy that we’re finally doing this.”
You give his hand a soft squeeze. “Me too.”
“Just promise me one thing?”
The sudden seriousness of his tone has your brow furrowing in concern. “Sure, of course,” you reassure. “What is it?”
He winces. “Please don’t tell my mom about all the dick pics.”
#hoseok#hoseok smut#hoseok x reader#bts smut#bts scenarios#hoseok scenarios#jhope#jung hoseok#bts#bts fanfic#bts fanfiction#bts fic#kpop scenarios#hoseok x you#strangers to lovers!au#strangers to lovers#lia writes#gonna change that stupid summary if i can think of anything better LOL#my brain went all mushy on me idk what's happening
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omg omg i know matthews birthday isnt for a couple weeks but i would die for a bday sex one shot omg
i made you wait so long for this i'm so sorry omg. one-shots usually take me longer bc i want them to be detailed!
summary: reader has plans for Matthew’s 41st birthday, but things take their own turn.
content warnings: unprotected penetrative sex, oral (male receiving), degradation, Soft!Dom Matthew with some fluff, too; fingering, creampie, implied age gap.
pairing: Fem!Reader/Matthew
word count: 4.3k
masterlist
I haul the enormous bag of flour onto the counter, grunting. it's early afternoon, and my day has been spent wrapping all of Matthew's gifts and trying to plan out the perfect birthday celebration. he's turning 41, and all I want is for him to feel as special as he feels to me. the cake is the last piece of the puzzle, and I'm hoping that my less-than-excellent culinary skills improve over the course of the next few hours.
I set out all the ingredients first, swaying to my music while I go through the recipe and decide how much I need. it shouldn't be too complicated, right? just chocolate cake with buttercream frosting. I thought I'd try to recreate the Rumple Buttercup cartoon with it, but now I'm not so sure. that might be flirting with disaster.
instead of deciding right there, I just get started on the batter. I'll cross that bridge when I come to it.
the air is thick with sweetness and warmth as the oven slowly pre-heats and I stir together the silky smooth chocolate batter. I pour the mix into a round baking pan, tapping it a bit to make sure it's even, before pushing it into the oven. naturally, I lick the whisk clean.
my phone buzzes in my pocket and I pull it out to see that Matthew's texted me.
on my way home now!
my heart stutters in my chest as I check the time. he's definitely early; he told me this morning that he wouldn't be at home until at least seven. my eyes flicker to the cake, over the messy kitchen, and back to my screen.
early?
yep. can't wait to see you. followed by a series of heart emojis. I start to panic a little. this throws my whole schedule off; I was going to do my hair, pick up food from his favorite restaurant, set the table, litter the bed with rose petals. I wanted everything to be just right for him; it's the first time he's had a birthday with me.
and now he's going to come home to me with flour-dusted cheeks and a half-baked cake. I quickly clean the kitchen and wipe my face before running off to the bedroom, rifling through my closet for something nice. thank god I already showered this morning because there's no way I'd have time now. I find the dress I'd planned to wear, red and slinky and pretty, before dropping my clothes and changing right away.
truly, I move at the speed of light when I do my hair, scatter the rose petals, and call the restaurant to get our order started. we'll need to run out and get it, but Matthew likes going for walks, so that shouldn't be a problem.
the smell of chocolate wafts through the house while I tie an apron around my waist and get a bowl out of the cabinets. the cake needs to cool for a while, but I might as well get started on the frosting. who knows how long that'll take?
too damn long, apparently.
Matthew opens the front door while I'm halfway through my crumb coat, the soft green shade of the Rumple Buttercup colors coming along nicely. I start to panic a little when I hear his footsteps on the stairs.
"Y/N!" he calls out.
"kitchen!" I respond without moving. he probably shouldn't see the cake, but at this point it's too late. there's fluffy buttercream frosting and food coloring all over my apron. all I can do is wait patiently as he strolls into the room.
"what are you up to?" he sets his hand on my back, smiling.
"making your cake, birthday boy."
"mmm." he wraps a hand around my arm, drags it down while leaning his chin on my shoulder. "looks really nice so far."
"you like the color?" I ask.
"I do." he mumbles, starting to touch my waist. "what material is this?"
"silk."
"you know I love that." he squeezes my waist and I have to resist the blush spreading up my cheeks. he's affectionate right now, and I want to resist, but it's hard.
"what're you doing?" I question playfully in response to the drifting of his fingers down my thighs.
"I'm excited to see you."
"I'm excited to see you, too, but we have a strict schedule tonight."
Matthew groans and drops his head into the space between my neck and shoulder. his hands don't leave my hips.
"why?" he whines.
"because I want you to have the best birthday ever." I smooth off the top of the cake, sighing when he digs his fingernails into me. it feels heavenly, and the featherlight kisses he's leveling on my jaw are making me woozy.
"making me wait?" he brushes over my ass, squeezing the flesh lightly. "that's cruel."
I laugh a little and swipe my finger through the frosting.
"try this and tell me if I'm still cruel."
he grabs my hand in both of his, sliding my index into his mouth and licking it off of me. my jaw drops in surprise before he pulls away and drops it. it's unbelievably sexy.
"that is really good." he smiles, then kisses my cheek in an alarmingly innocent manner. he knows what he's doing. "don't be a tease, darling."
"you--" I stutter, trying to regain my concentration. it's futile at this point; it isn't until he moves away from my body that I'm able to keep working on the cake. he only glances with a knowing smirk, walking around the counter to sit across from me.
"how was your day?"
"my day was jam-packed with planning for a little ingrate's birthday." I joke.
"I'm not an ingrate." he protests. one look at his pout and I feel guilty for teasing. standing on tiptoes, I lean over the counter and plant a kiss on his mouth.
"you're right, I'm sorry," I sigh. "I just had a whole plan and when you came home early, I didn't have time for all of it."
"what can I do?" he offers immediately. I scowl.
"you're not gonna help me prepare your birthday celebration, silly."
"but I wanna make it easier."
"you wanna make it easier?" I ask, the corners of my lips quirking up. he nods enthusiastically and I hold his gaze. "I need to go pick up our dinner, so you can walk with me."
"ooh, yes!" he leaps up in an almost child-like manner, coming around to my side again. I nuzzle into his shoulder as I finish piping the face onto the cake. he snorts when he sees the completed project. "is that Rumple?"
"shut up, it looks so bad." I complain. my body leans into his in defeat. even though I tried, Rumple looks like he's been possessed and exorcised in one sitting: he's got crazy eyes and a lopsided face.
"no, it's beautiful," he pecks the top of my head. "he's supposed to look funny."
all I can do is turn around and hug him, giggling at the absolute monstrosity that I've created. he wraps his arms around me tightly and we start to sway a little.
"I feel like Victor Frankenstein." I laugh. he untangles our bodies to tilt my chin up and look at him.
"you're way cuter." he rubs my nose with his own. I'm smiling so big, it hurts. he makes me so unbelievably happy, I can't imagine not being by his side. Matthew is the best boyfriend in the world, and I really want everything to live up to his expectations.
our fingers thread together briefly before we get ready to go pick up our food.
...
"I am literally going to combust." I giggle, throwing my napkin onto the table. red wax drips down the sides of the candle between us, and Matthew's eyes are starry as he watches me talk.
"good?" he asks.
"amazing. how was yours?"
"could barely get it down." he gestures to the empty plate. I throw my head back and laugh more than I should. Matthew frowns. "what?"
"that's such a dad joke."
"really?" he laughs along with me until we're both just smiling brightly at each other. I don't want to step too far; we've been dating under a year, still. but I see myself with Matthew forever. we've already moved in together; I've never felt so strongly as I feel for him, and I think that he feels it, too. in our bones.
"yes, but I like dad jokes."
"come here." he holds his arms out and I get up from the table, walking over to sit on his lap. he shifts so I can be more comfortable, and I place both hands on my stomach.
"I have such a food baby right now."
"do you?" he sets one hand over the bump. I lean my head into his shoulder, curling up a little. he starts to rub my tummy gently, holding me close while we sit in a relative quiet. "I like it."
"mmm." I hum, wrapping my arms around his neck. although he could easily turn this sexual, he doesn't. we just linger, breathing and letting our food settle. I really am full; the chances of me falling asleep are higher than not.
I ask Matthew to tell me more about his day as I sit there, and the rumble of his voice in his chest is soothing. as the candle wax drips further and further down, I watch it with lethargic eyes. I've had a hard year-- Matthew's made it better. he can read me like a book, and he listens like I've got all the answers in the world. I love him. and when I head to the kitchen to slice the cake, he follows me with his arms around my waist. we move like two people who have been together a long time, like we can anticipate the next person's movement down to the flicker of their eye contact, down to their step.
"I can't believe you have room for dessert." I grab a knife from the drawer, along with some plates. Matthew kisses my head.
"I've got room for multiple desserts."
"was that a sexual allusion or are you actually hungry?" I turn briefly to gauge his behavior. if he hasn't had enough to eat, I'll feel horrible. but he leans down to my ear. it still sends a shiver down my spine.
"definitely sexual," he smirks, then retreats. "let's do this, though, first. I want a piece of Rumple's eyeball."
"just get out the candles so I can do this for you." I push him away. he heads to the cupboard and returns with the pack of candles that I begin to spear into the cake. I only put in ten because there's not room for forty-one, but he doesn't seem to mind as I light them up individually.
"go sit down! you weren't even supposed to come in here." I laugh as I lift the dish into my arms and shoo him into the other room. Matthew gives me a sidelong look, smiling for an unknown reason, before following my orders.
he pretends to look surprised when I bring the thing out to him, mouth making a pleased O shape.
"wow!" he cheers.
"make a wish, then, my love." I tell him. he inhales deeply, then blows out the candles. one or two stragglers remain, their flames flickering before he tries again and snuffs them out. I clap my hands.
"happy birthday, baby!"
he grins at me and starts to pluck the candles out of the cake. "you didn't sing to me." he says.
"trust me, that was a gift in itself." I laugh before picking up the knife. "how big a slice do you want?"
Matthew seems to think for a second on this, squinting as he examines the thing.
"big."
"alright then." I cut an enormous hunk out, making sure to get one of the maddened eyeballs on it before sliding it onto the plate and giving it to him. "enjoy."
"oh, I will." before I can move to sit across from him, he reaches out and pulls me into his lap. I let out a surprised noise, but settle in anyway on his thigh while I cut my own slice of cake. we eat together.
"it's actually pretty good." I'm impressed with myself. sure, it's not a super complicated recipe. but I still did well. Matthew wraps his arm around my waist, one hand holding his plate while the other digs the fork in.
"it's amazing." he nods through a mouthful of food.
"how's the eye?"
"how you'd expect a vitreous humor to taste." he jokes, laughing as I elbow him in the ribs. "ow!" he complains. I swipe some of the frosting off the top of his slice and tap it over his nose. he wrinkles it at the sensation.
"maybe I'll just leave." I move to get up, but he keeps me in place. his little smile, so determined in its happiness, makes my heart soften. for all of his teasing, he's weak for me, and I love it. when I lean down a little to lick the icing off, he blushes.
"when can I have you?" he asks quietly, one hand resting on the top of my bare thigh. it tightens around my skin, growing more aware of my presence in his lap. I bite my lip and mull this over, subtly draw the hem of my dress up a bit just to tease him.
"I'm thinking..." this time, he lets me get up. my fingers slide through his, dragging him with me. "now."
Matthew gets an excited grin on his face before I spin around and lead him to the bedroom. a couple candles are burning, filling the room with a deep, sensual smell that he inhales as he stops in his tracks.
"did you put rose petals on our bed?" he chuckles, staring at me with his eyebrows raised in an adoring expression. I run my palms up his chest, stopping below his shoulders. I poke my tongue between my teeth as I smile.
"yes, I did."
"very romantic."
"is it?" I lift an eyebrow. it takes everything in me not to pounce on him right then.
"consider me seduced."
"if you ever use that word again, I'm calling this off." I laugh. he silences it in a kiss, eagerly gathering my body up in his arms as he tilts his head to deepen it. a slight moan slips through me, pleased with the gentle, innocent pleasure he elicits. he's softer than velvet. when he crushes the silk of my dress in his fist, lifting it over my ass so he can touch me without barriers, he groans.
"did I pay for this?" he rolls the fabric between his fingers.
"mhmm." I hum.
"good." his breath hitches when the zipper comes down easily, the garment falling to the floor and leaving me in brand new black lingerie. his eyes move hungrily over my body, pupils dilating further as he takes in the curves of my figure.
"this is new."
I twist around a bit, showing him the back as well, his grip on my waist loosening only to allow me this movement. "you like it?"
he groans. "I love it."
I want to start undressing him, greedy for the sight of his naked body, but he reaches down and lifts me into his arms, my legs wrapping around him while he carries me to the floral-covered mattress. I sink into a rosy paradise, almost give into the alluring sensations he causes with his fingertips over my skin.
he's between my legs, teeth seeking out collarbone and the swell of my chest. it would be so, so easy to remain here, pinned down and allowing him to let loose on me. every deliberate shadow on my body is like a sunburst. but I can't.
I grab his shoulders and yank him down next to me. he peers at me with a smile, wondering what I've got in store. the answer is too loaded to fit into one sentence, so I watch him move up the bed until he's resting his head on the pillow, my legs moving to straddle him.
"taking control?" he questions. he knows I don't usually like to be on top. instead of replying, I reach behind me and undo the clasps of my bra, sliding it from my arms before tossing it somewhere else. his eyes widen and he goes to grab at my tits, but I'm too quick. I lean down, unbuttoning his shirt and drawing my nails over his chest as I lower myself to his pants.
Matthew is silent, open-mouthed at the red marks I leave behind on his smooth skin. it's intoxicating for me, too, and I work quickly to tug his bottoms down his legs, the boxers with them. when his dick is released, I let him struggle through a moment of no contact.
"let me touch you." he goes to stroke himself. my gaze flickers between the length he's now gripping in his hand and the needy look on his face. I want to fuck him right now. every cell in my body aches for him, for the pleasure that so violently rips through my veins when he's inside.
"not yet." I betray myself, and his hips buck into empty air when he sees my torso so close to his erection. when I drop my head and lick up the underside, he lets go of himself and allows me to tease him. I pause at the tip, then hold the base while I spit on it.
"shit!" he grunts as I start to swirl my tongue around him. his fingers run through my hair. "suck on it, baby."
all I do is moan, the vibration torturing him. I peek up through my lashes and see the veins in his neck throbbing while he resists the urge to fuck my mouth. I soften and lower my head slowly, inch by inch swallowing his cock. he hits the back of my throat. the slight gag that runs through me makes him sigh. it's then that I tap his hand as our signal to push my head down.
Matthew loses it. he starts to shove my mouth onto him, fucking it, one hand reaching behind him to grab the top of the headboard while he groans.
"choke on it... fuck." he moans. there are tears in my eyes from the pressure, but I keep looking at him the whole time. he's gorgeous, mouth dropped open in ecstasy while he goes between rolling his eyes into the back of his head and staring with an intense desire.
every time I gag, he lets out an unholy noise and gets excited all over again, his hips moving to meet my lips until he's on the edge of falling apart. his cock twitches and I moan, but he's not willing to finish.
"get over here so I can fuck you." his voice is borderline raspy as he forces himself to release my head. I sit up and wipe the spit from my mouth, crawling on top of him again to leave some of my favorite marks on his neck. he's mine. every bite stands to prove it, and his quick breaths let me know that he's not going to wait much longer.
his fingertips hook in the waistband of my panties and he pushes them down my thighs, purses his lips while he watches me shimmy out of them. it's wonderful, seeing the disarray in his face whenever he catches sight of my naked form. he never knows where to touch first, moving over my breasts to my waist and hips down to my legs. like he's trying to blend our bodies together by simply drinking me in.
I tense when he reaches out and sinks two fingers into me. I'm so wet, it takes almost no pressure.
"fucking soaked, huh?" he smirks. my hands steady themselves on his shoulders as he starts to pump in and out of me. I groan.
"get inside, please." I murmur nearly incoherently. he starts to go faster, his cock throbbing against his stomach. but he wants me to squirm and beg.
"oh, so you've got demands?" he teases. his fingers curl in my pussy, brushing over my special spot, and I almost gasp at the pleasure. "after making me wait?"
"I just--" I start to defend myself, but it's fruitless. he guides my face down to his, whispering in my ear.
"let me guess: you just wanted me to have a good birthday?"
"yes." a choked, desperate reply.
"let me show you what kind of present I want, then." he removes his fingers and lines himself up at my entrance, pushing me all the way down before sliding the pads of his digits into my mouth. I lick them clean while I moan. his cock is so deep inside me, I can barely breathe.
the combined pressures between my hips and on my tongue, make me give up on drawing this out. it feels so good, I couldn't stop myself if I wanted to. I rise up a bit and sink onto him again, his jaw clenched at the sensation. he lets me do this a couple times and then pauses my actions.
"get on your hands and knees." he orders. I lift myself obediently, whining slightly at the loss of contact, before he sits up and switches positions so that he's kneeling behind. I wait patiently for him to do what he wants with me. he doesn't disappoint.
softly, he pushes my head down so that my cheek rests against the pillow while he slides in from the back. it's a completely different angle and I can barely handle the way he works through the tightness, his moans louder this time.
"thought you could sit on it and I would just let you?" he chuckles darkly, pulling out and moving in. my breath rattles in my chest at the repeated, delicious intrusions. my eyelids flutter shut while he keeps talking to me in that commanding, low tone. "you're my little slut."
the moan that comes from my lips is pathetic, like a mewl. he plows into me and my face presses into the mattress.
"such a perfect little pussy," his hands lure my hips to him while he groans at the new depths he keeps finding. "so responsive for me."
"faster, Matthew." I whine. although he's not going slow, I need more. the slam of his body against mine, from this angle, creates just short of enough friction for my clit. he follows my request, however, and fucks me at an insatiable pace.
"you like that?" he grunts. I literally don't have the mobility to nod, so I shove my ass back instead to take more. he bucks. "you feel so fucking good."
I whimper and he starts to stimulate my clit by reaching around, lowering himself a bit to do so. he keeps his arm pressed to my stomach so he can feel the bulge of his cock sliding in and out of me. "good girl. take it."
my fingertips fist the sheets and I whine as my orgasm approaches. he switches the pattern of pressure, finding what makes me fall apart fastest. I'm on the edge, my mouth dropping open in a silent cry. my hips start to move on their own, working against his cock as I moan his name and tumble into the abyss.
"Matthew, right there-- fuck me, fuck me--" I moan. he rams his hips so hard, the headboard slams the wall and he groans.
"you're gonna make me break you, baby." he warns. I bite my lip so hard that I almost puncture the skin, feeling like a planetary collision is occurring within my lower stomach. I'm coming up on a second climax.
"break me, then." I dare.
Matthew wraps his arm around my chest and brings me up so that I'm leaning against his chest while he whispers in my ear. "defiant little whores don't get my cum."
"but--" I complain, hips wriggling for more while he thrusts into me.
"apologize or I'll stop fucking you right now." he slows just to demonstrate the torture of not being inside me. I grasp at his hips to coax him, but he's determined. I take a shaky breath at the smooth, slow movements.
"I'm sorry." I beg. he reaches down and starts to play with my bundle of nerves again. as much as he wants to make me crash, he loves the way this feels, too.
"mmm," he hums while laying sloppy kisses along my neck. "good thing I wanna fill you up for being so sweet today."
his thrusts are uncontrolled and needy, rapid pushes between my legs that cause me to start shaking all over again. he rubs my clit and moans in my ear, spilling.
"I love you so much." he mumbles. the hand holding me to him squeezes one of my tits while I arch my spine and enjoy the slowing pace of our bodies. I moan his name.
"I love you, too." I'm in awe of how he changes for me, his attitude shifts whenever we're in bed. it's cosmic, how we fit together. and his withdrawal from my body causes both of us to collapse onto the bed with exhaustion.
I can only suck in air for a while. my limbs are like lead, in the best way.
"that was hot." he mutters. I turn to him, admiring his beautiful features, and nod lazily.
"a successful birthday, then?"
"after that cake? yeah." he scoffs jokingly and I giggle before curling into him. he traces his fingertips down my skin. "do you wanna take a shower?"
"I'm so tired." I groan. Matthew glances at me.
"I'm the one who just turned forty-one."
"shut up."
"come on, then. let's get you cleaned up."
he rises from the mattress, bringing me with him. a few stray rose petals flutter onto the ground.
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SU Music Rankings
Bc I can and I wanna start some Disk Horse rip. These are all in order of preference, with explanations, etc. It’s a long bitch. That said, I’m not counting little short jingles or small joke songs like Little Butler. This is the meat and potatoes of SU music- just under 30 songs. I might do the rest if people like my takes lol.
I scored it mostly on three bases- how dear it was to my heart, how much/often I relisten to it, and also what it means to the plot. That said, little fun songs don’t automatically go farther down than big, plot-heavy songs either! It’s a strange little balance.
Special Note: I don’t dislike any of this music! I love SU and that includes its bumps and glitches. I just pick favorite children lol.
1.) Change
Was there ever a more Steven moment than when he wiped the blood off his face and kissed it into sparkles? I think not.
If “Be Wherever You Are” is an ode to young Steven, then this is teen Steven’s. Talking about change, and how much and how little it can do. How he holds his arms up for Spinel to hug him, so trusting. How he seems able to just. Break into soft tears at will, and not to be manipulative- it’s just his kind nature. The warmth in his voice. Fuck yesssss.
2.) Change Your Mind
This song is only fifty five seconds and it’s EVERYTHING to me. It really felt like someone was speaking the words I’d always held deep inside of me, unsure of how to say. It feels like a goodbye to someone who never really loved me.
As much as I enjoyed Future, if this was the finale of SU, I would’ve been perfectly okay with that.
3.) Drift Away
This song gave me legitimate shivers the first time I heard it, and it still haunts me to this day. Spinel stayed, and waited, and all she got was a transmission thousands of years later. Fuck.
4.) Here We Are In The Future
THE MOVIE IS SU AS ITS BEST AND I WON’T BE SWAYED ON IT. Steven being a teen who loves his weird family but is growing just a bit sarcastic to their drama. The adorable love he and Connie share. His slow realization that he will always be working, always have things to do, is both somber and real. The Crystal Gems won’t be safe with one epic battle. They’ll be safe with years of hard work and love. HIS LITTLE HANDSHAKE WITH AMETHYST.
This is a helluva bop and a great way to summarize the main character’s backstories.
5.) Let’s Only Think About Love
Did ya’ll know that Zach Callison killed his throat with that last note? He gave his all for this performance in a vocal range he no longer comfortably do and by god did it SHINE. The FLAIR. The FORESHADOWING. All of the Gems all being awkward about Rose and Steven trying to bring them to the present. Peridot having a mini-existential crisis in a cute yellow dress. I love Zach Callison’s normal singing voice but man is that a fucking bop. Nothing will ever beat it.
6.) Here Comes A Thought
This bad boy helped me out a LOT with some mental issues I was dealing with in high school. I was unmedicated, unsupervised, and full of anxiety. I’d have break downs when I tried to speak about certain things. I couldn’t function. This song inspired me. It helped me feel okay with my intrusive thoughts.
And the episode! -chef’s kiss-. Once again bringing up the morally gray area of training child soldiers. Connie expanding her social group. Steven’s trauma hauling ass in that second half. The ANIMATION. Stevonnie’s gorgeous singing voice. GOD yes.
7.) It’s Over Isn’t It?
Just barely squeaking above Stronger Than You, this ballad is everything gorgeous. The whole episode is. I think Mr. Greg stands in the top five of my episodes for the entire show. It even got nominated!
There’s just so much about this song that I love. The gentle melancholy of Pearl’s voice. How the crew had to redo the shots for this bit bc Deedee went so fucking hard. The hard cuts between Pearl, remembering the love of her life, and Steven, who has begun to feel like he took her away. I’d recommend this song to anyone, regardless of what they do or don’t know about SU, simply bc it tugs so many heartstrings of love, loss, and responsibility.
8.) Stronger Than You
Did you realize this episode aired SEVEN years ago? This bitch was what got me into SU! Hearing about Ruby and Sapphire made my little gay heart so happy inside, and then getting a whole song confirming that they were a couple, that their love powered the strongest Gem on the team? Aaaaaaaaa
To this DAY I get excited when I hear Estelle start singing. This song is timeless. This song will live in media history. God I fucking love this song.
9.) Other Friends
I’m not the biggest musical person, so I hadn’t heard of Sarah Stiles before her casting as Spinel, but JESUS CHRIST the lady went hard. She went SO fucking hard. Sarah Stiles started on 100 and somehow just kept CLIMBING. You can just hear the sheer manic energy building in her voice, the anger and resentment. 10/10 Sarah Stiles is a queen.
10.) Independent Together
This made the list entirely bc the crew was like “you’re gonna get a himbo ass Steven-Greg fusion singing with Opal while Garnet flies across the moon on Lion while floating” and I am forever thankful to them for it
11.) Who We Are
Bismuth deserved more songs. ‘Nuff said.
12.) Peace and Love (On the Planet Earth)
It Could’ve been Great is EASILY one of my favorite s2 episodes. I love the entire concept of this song. Of Steven making music to reflect how much Earth means to him and his family. Of him teaching Peridot some self-care. Also Peridot’s singing voice is really cute and squeaky.
I know it’s silly, but I would’ve really enjoyed a flip around of this in Future! Like Peridot reminding Steven how much he loves music, that he needs to take time to relax for himself, maybe with a new verse or just a remix of the original song!
13.) Something Entirely New
I watched this episode as it aired, and I legitimately almost cried. I love Charlyne Yi’s voice so much ya’ll- her raspy, not perfect singing voice against Sapphire’s deep soothing lull is great.
And to have Ruby and Sapphire’s meeting be the way it was- for Ruby to bemoan Sapphire losing Homeworld, to being stuck with a single Ruby, while Sapphire is a noble who has always been taught everyone in her “caste” is vitally important (and has, in her own mind, taken that to mean every Gem, as she should) and how they come together and make each other happy. Good shit good shit.
14.) I’m Just a Comet
The fact that Greg’s music career never really blasted off pisses me off to this day bc Tom Scharpling’s voice is fucking BUTTER. Also the song really feels like a jab at his parents now that we know the kind of dynamic he had growing up. “This life in the stars if all I’ve ever known” is definitely him wiping away their existence after reminding them (and himself) the things they used to say about him.
15.) Do It For Her
This episode. This fucking episode. This episode got me permanently hooked on SU. I’d just binged season 1 and was kinda meh about it overall after the bop of Stronger Than You. “Oh,” I thought to myself, foolishly, “I’ll probably just casually watch this from time to time.”
Like three days later Sworn to the Sword aired and that was it. I was hooked! Pearl’s gentle training song turning darker and darker, Connie’s accompaniment from nervous to determined to fully into such a toxic mindset. The fact that SU had the BALLS to discuss the repercussions of training child soldiers, now and later. This episode was everything to me, STILL is everything to me.
Six years and well over 100 fanfics written later, I think it’s safe to say this show swallowed me whole and never let go.
16.) System/Boot.pearl_final(3)
I debated putting this on the list because it’s not anything crazy important, just a way to show things are Wrong, but I had to do it entirely bc Pearl is so damn SALTY.
Like telling us about the Gems makes sense, she felt like she was given a duty, but she went so damn petty. WHY is that Ruby alone. Gross. This Amethyst is a trash dump. Wtf are you people.
17.) Full Disclosure
This episode really feels like a turning point for SU. Before, the show had its dark moments- but now we’re in the thick of it, and it’s not going away. Full Disclosure felt like an rebuff to the idea of returning to any normal we’d established in season 1. Gems are actually a giant species now. Gems tried to kill us now. There’s this Yellow Diamond bitch who got namedropped. Something about a Cluster.
The song itself is BALLER, with its ingenious use of Steven’s ringtone and photos as he tries to decide whether to clue in Connie on all this nonsense. Meanwhile we, the audience, already know damn well Connie about to yeet some common sense into him.
18.) What’s the Use of Feeling Blue?
I’mma admit it- I’m a Yellow Diamond stan. I’ve always loved her- her anger, her poise, her hardworking nature. I actively argued against the “Yellow Shattered Pink” theories back in the day. But, man, when this arc leaked? I got so overexcited I was too jittery to watch it for like two days. It’s easily my favorite arc of the series. The sheer alien nature of the zoo, the Famethyst, and absolutely Patti Lupone’s beautiful ballad. Goddamn. Yellow singing to Blue to try and help her regain her old status, the warble in her voice as she reminds Blue she misses Pink too, the movement of the bubbles as she talks about attack. It gives me shivers to this day. FUCK.
19.) Tower of Mistakes
This is, fun fact, that only SU song I have completely memorized. The story itself is kinda funny! See, we lost internet at my house for a solid 5 to 6 months when these episodes aired, so I only got a very brief window to view them all. But this was the first Amethyst song in a long while, and I didn’t want to forget it! So I keep replaying it in my head for ages. And that’s still definitely a thing.
Anyway will never not be sad that this entire song was about making it up to Garnet for Amethyst’s perceived slights with Sugilite (which was a two-way road), only for Garnet to pressure her into fusion later when pissed and never discuss it again bc Garnet probably never thought twice about it and Amethyst has the emotional openness of a clam that’s just been told its ugly. Helluva way to make someone feel like shit, G. Helluva way to bottle that shit, Ames.
20.) On the Run
I’ve said it once, I’ve said it a million times: Amethyst! Needed! More! Songs!
The dichotomy between Steven’s play and Amethyst’s honest desire to run away from home is so well-done, especially when you consider a lot of Steven and Amethyst’s actions are playing together. The song is also near and dear to me simply bc it’s my favorite Amethyst episode to exist (well, maybe second to What’s Your Problem, but not by much). Moments like these are all the proof I need that they were right to fuse first.
21.) Be Wherever You Are
This tune really just feels like an ode to who Steven was as a kid. Trapped on an island with no way home, and he’s just happy to be with his friends. The stars are beautiful and not oppressive. Also that one animatic with Lars and the Off Colors playing in the Homeworld Kindergarten to this music was iconic and made this song get stuck in my head for a solid month.
22.) Familiar
I ADORE how the crew use bright neon colors to show how alien Homeworld can be. And Steven recognizing that the Diamonds treat him how the CGs used to, and how prepared he is to “fix” a broken family. It’s a soft, gentle tune about melancholy. Also the Pebbles are beautiful.
23.) Let Me Drive My Van Into Your Heart
Such a cute little love ballad, but every time I listen to it now I just imagine the heart attack Rose must’ve had at the line “And if we look out of place/Well, baby, that's okay/I'll drive us into outer space.” like there’s a Vietnam war flashback if I ever heard one
24.) What Can I Do?
I’m kind of neutral on this one? Rose and Greg both have great voices, but the song itself lacks many lyrics. I think it was definitely a good way to show Rose’s flaws in thinking.
Also, I’m shocked they managed cram that much vaguely sexual innuendo into two minutes, followed by how Not Hetereo that dance between Rose and Pearl was, and not get their asses chewed by it. You go guys.
25.) Cookie Cat
I love a lot of the vibes this song has. The lyrics are so damn prophetic, but they also sound like the kind of weird 90s commercials I grew up on. It’s been like two decades since I saw the Shirley Temple commercial but I’ll be damned if I don’t remember “Animals crackers in my soup! Monkey and rabbits loop-de-loop.”
26.) Giant Woman
I am. NOT the biggest fan of Steven’s original singing voice. I feel bad saying that, since it was just Zach Callison as a kid, but he never jived well with me for some reason. So I wouldn’t listen to this on the fly.
The song itself is still really good though, with all sorts of fun animation of Amethyst and Pearl being bitchy to each other. It’s a bit sad in hindsight to see tiny Steven trying to get his moms to get along. Ahh, season 1.
27.) Strong in the Real Way
This song has SUCH a strong start. Pearl reflecting on Sugilite’s problems, but the show making sure to show us that Pearl’s lack of enthusiasm towards her also lends itself to jealousy as well as just general malaise. How much she cares about Steven, and wants him to grow up strong.
And then Steven just kinda. Ruins it? I appreciate his enthusiasm for tryna bulk up but to take what was starting as such a rich, personal song and broadcasting it to random strangers just makes me a bit sad. Almost a bit angry on her behalf?
28.) That Distant Shore
I KNOW this is gonna create some discourse, but I’m just not the biggest Lapis stan. I love her voice. I love the visuals of the song. And I get why she felt afraid and needed to flee.
But Lapis never got to take responsibility for her own actions. And, in the end, the song feels hollow to me- because we all know she’ll never talk to anyone about it, know she’ll burst back in and destroy the barn, and no one will ever question it. I like Lapis a lot, but I feel like her arc never was fully finished. She never got help. She never learned to feel safe.
29.) Dear Old Dad
I’ve yet to meet a single human being who likes this episode tbh. There’s some great discussion about what kind of parent Greg is from it, and what kind of dynamic he has with the Gems that he felt he had to fake an injury to hang out with his son. Honestly the first half was fine and dandy. It’s just that then they Greg just went out of his way to drag Steven away from missions and such. It never jived well with his character before or after.
Also, is it just me, or does Zach himself sound like he hates the song as he sings it? There’s no passion or heart in his voice. It sounds like they told him to read off cue cards and he did. Tom Scharpling’s best attempts didn’t save this one for being a skipper. But the episode, unfortunately, isn’t, so it gets a spot on here.
#Steven Universe#Steven Universe Future#SU Analysis#(I guess????)#Music#Steven Quartz Universe#Amethyst#Garnet#Pearl#Yellow Diamond#Blue Diamond#Blue Pearl#Yellow Pearl#Greg Universe#Bismuth#Spinel#Lapis Lazuli#Steg#Opal#Rose Quartz#Lars Barriga#Sadie Miller#Sapphire#Ruby#Stevonnie#Falc talks
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Maybe in the future you could avoid using the R-word? I’m sure there are plenty of ways you could have criticised Percival’s Mevolent without using an ableist slur.
TL;DR: No. At this point pretty much everything is a slur/offensive, so I might as well just keep saying ‘retard’ instead of making every post I write a parkour of trying to avoid the current offensive-flavour-of-the-day that no one but 3 people on the internet actually think is offensive.
Long Version: 'Retard'/'retarded' is the correct word tho. It's an actual medical term. The more modern versions would be 'mentally handicapped, disabled or underdeveloped'. Should I use those instead?
Oh nevermind, those terms are offensive now too.
You can sanitize and rip the humanity out of the language all you want, whatever new word you come up with will end up being a insult too in a very short amount of time. Bc the problem is not the word, it's the undesirable condition it describes that makes it offensive. So no matter what word you are going to use to describe a person with said condition, it will always be offensive in this world of chronically offended snowflakes. I mean, they are literally trying to claim 'dumb', 'insane' and 'crazy' are slurs now despite those being like the tamest insults you can come up with.
[source]
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And it gets even crazier than that. Apparently the terms ‘mother’ and ‘father’ are offensive now. So is the term ‘homosexuals’?? Remember when that was the polite term to use instead of ‘faggot’? Remember when ‘queer’ was an offensive term? And now it’s apparently ‘reclaimed’. What’s acceptable and why not changes every day and there seems to be no rhyme or reason to it. At this point you’d need to hire a layer to keep tabs of this shit bc no person that actually has a life can keep up with this.
I understand why I probably shouldn't say tr*nny or the n-word but I don't understand why retard, dumb or insane should be more offensive than the multiple calls to McFucking kill Landy just bc he's too incompetent to write his own book series decently. Something which is quite frankly far more psychotic, yet I'm more likely to get called out for saying the new slur 'psychotic' (yes, that's considered offensive now too) than for literal death threats.
In a world where everything offends everyone and even the terms that are considered polite today are offensive tomorrow, why should I give a damn who I offend/using offensive terms? Grow a thicker skin, watch some George Carlin and learn to laugh and enjoy life for once, will ya?
#these two are so convinced of their own position that they aren't even coming off anon#perhaps they know how silly they are sounding?#anti political correctness#anti pc#I said it once and I'll say it again#I'm a free speech advocate so I completely hate this political correctness bs
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VALERIE - Part IV. (Harry Styles)
hello loves!! thank you so much for the feedbacks on the previous part, i love to see your thoughts at reactions so please keep them coming for the upcoming parts as well! i was informed that the posts weren’t showing up under the hashtags bc i had an extrernal link to the spotify playlist, so that won’t be available in the next parts, but you’ll always be able to find it in the masterpost if you’d like to give it a listen! those were the songs i listened to while writing the story! now, i dont want to keep you up any longer, here is part 4, one of my personal favs, and im excitedly waiting for your feedbacks on the post! have a wonderful reading!
word count: 4.5k
SERIES MASTERPOST
masterlist
Valerie is curiously watching her dad work on the portable bed they’ve brought over for the night, her little hands clutching onto Rosa’s shirt as she is telling you all about the list she has made for you. It’s not a long one, but you try to focus on every word she says, making sure you won’t mess anything up.
“I put an X behind the important ones,” she explains pointing at the paper and you nod, eyes roaming down on the few X’s on the list. “The other ones are just suggestions, things I thought you should know.
“Got it,” you nod again, biting into your bottom lip. Bath time, feeding, sleep time, everything is covered in the list and you’re happy she even mentioned the smallest details. Some things might be natural for her as she’s been doing it for months, but it’s your first time completely alone with a baby. You surely don’t want to mess this up, especially because you want her to trust you and let you look after Valerie more often. They deserve a break now and then.
Steven finishes the bed and backs out a few stuffed animals along with two blankets into it, making it look cozy and familiar for Val.
“But most importantly,” Rosa starts and you look her in the eyes. “Call us anytime if you need help or want us to take her home, and I mean it.”
“Not gonna happen,” you shake your head, earning a sigh from your sister.
“Y/N, I’m serious. We are thankful for the help, but it’s not your duty, alright? Just call us anytime, really.”
Nodding your head you flash a smile at her, knowing well nothing on Earth is gonna make you call them tonight. Okay, maybe there are some cases when you would call, but those are quite unlikely to happen.
She hands Valerie over who curiously eyes you before grabbing a handful of your shirt and making herself busy with the fabric.
“It’s gonna be fine. Have a great night, you deserve it,” you smile at them. Steven straightens up and curls an arm around Rosa’s waist as they watch Val in awe, clearly a little worried they are gonna spend an entire night without her, but you can tell they also can’t wait for some alone time.
“Alright, we should get going,” Rosa sighs and stepping closer she kisses Valerie’s head and then your cheek as well. “Have fun with your aunty! We’ll be back for you in the morning, Sweetie.”
She runs her hand over her little head and Valerie smiles at her happily, completely oblivious to what’s really happening. The joys of being just a baby!
Steven says goodbye to her as well and you all head to the door.
“So, we’ll be here around eight, she is usually up by six. Do you want us to pick her up sooner?” Rosa asks standing at the front door.
“Sooner? I was about to tell you to sleep a little longer, you don’t have to come so early.”
“But we don’t want to take away your whole day, you need to rest too,” Steven explains, worry all over his face.
“Stop worrying about me, I’ll be fine. Just enjoy your night off! Come on, I’m throwing you guys out, time for the sleepover to start,” you tell them, shushing them out the door.
It takes some time to finally get them to leave, but they eventually do. Then it’s just the two of you, alone for the first time.
“Ready for your first sleepover, Val?” you ask her, standing in the hallway of your apartment. She just stares back at you, saliva drooling from her mouth but even that looks cute on her. “Alright, let’s do this.”
You braced yourself for the worst. Thought about all the possibilities how the evening would go, but you hoped they wouldn't become reality. Unfortunately, baby Valerie had different plans for the two of you.
The first hour goes by fine. You feed her, have a little play time, reading her favorite book to her, but slowly, you notice her losing interest in anything and everything. Soon enough, you see her face distort into a grimace and a few moments later she starts crying and it’s straight downhill from there.
Nothing can get her to stop. No food, no toy, absolutely nothing. You clown around, trying everything that pops into your mind that would calm her down, but it doesn’t seem like she is about to stop anytime soon.
You start to panic. Rosa told you how fussy she is because of her teeth coming, but you didn’t think it would be this bad. When she’s been crying for an entire hour straight, for a split second, you think about calling Rosa.
“No, not gonna do that,” you say, while Val is still screaming in your arms. “Valerie, what do you want? Tell me and I’ll give it to you, I promise! Just please stop crying!” you whine desperately, but, no surprise, no answer comes from the screaming babe in your arms, just more tears, puffy eyes and red cheeks from all the crying she’s been doing.
Trying to rock her into calmness you are moving around in the apartment when you hear your phone ringing. You instantly think it’s gonna be Rosa, wanting to check in on you, but how are you gonna answer the call when Valeries is screaming from the top of her lungs? She’ll come to pick her up straight away, no doubt about that.
Rushing into the kitchen you are relieved to see that it’s just Harry calling you.
“It’s not the best of times, Styles,” you sigh as you answer the call and put him on the speaker, leaving the phone on the countertop, so you have both your hands free for Valerie.
“Hey, I was just-- what the fuck is happening?” he asks hearing the deadly cries of Val through the line. “Is that Valerie?”
“It is! I’m looking after her so Rosa and Steven can celebrate their anniversary, but she just wouldn’t stop crying! I don’t know what to do!”
You’re absolutely desperate. It’s so bad you can feel your throat closing up, nearing the edge of your patience, tears threatening to roll down your cheeks, but you tell yourself only one of you can cry at a time and Val has taken that spot quite some time ago, not even giving you a moment to let loose.
“Text me your address, I’m leaving now,” he orders and you snap your head towards the phone.
“What? No, Harry--”
“Just text me the damn address, Y/N!” he barks and the line cuts off right away.
Your desperation pairs with shock now, not knowing what to think about this short, but quite eventful conversation you just had with him. It takes you a few moments to collect your thoughts, but you end up sending him your address.
Nothing changes in the twenty minutes while you are waiting to hear anything from Harry following your text to him. Valerie keeps crying with three seconds of pauses when she takes a few deep breaths only to start screaming once again. Aside from the headache she is causing you, it’s becoming pretty impressive how long she’s been doing it. You probably would have fainted by now, but it seems like Valerie is running on an endless battery.
“You are really making it hard for me to be a cool aunt, Val,” you mumble, the baby still in your arms as the tears keep rolling down her face. Your light grey shirt is now soaking wet, both from her tears and your sweat from the anxiety she is giving you, mixed with some other things you choose to ignore where they came from.
The doorbell makes you jump, but Valerie doesn’t even bat an eye at the sound, she just keeps going.
“You need to teach me how to have this much energy,” you mumble under your breath as you walk over to the door.
Opening it you find yourself staring up at Harry who is wearing a brown coat, dark jeans and a black hoodie. If you had to guess what he was doing on this weekend evening you would have said he was out with friends somewhere, picking up girls, but he surely doesn’t look like he was anywhere else than his home, the clothes are hanging messily on his frame, like he just threw them on in a rush.
His green eyes look straight at you at first before moving over to the crying child in your arms. You fully expect him to say something along the lines of “this is the kind of effect you have on others” comment, but it seems like he notices the fear and despair in your eyes and he keeps his mouth shut.
“I honestly have no idea what to do,” you choke out and the tears start flowing from your eyes as well, making Harry have to deal with now two crying human beings.
“Oh my, please don’t cry, I can’t take two crying women at once,” Harry begs as he steps inside and shuts the door behind him. Turning to face you he reaches for Valerie, you hand her over to him, hoping she would magically stop the crying, but she clearly couldn’t care less.
“Why, can you take one?” you ask with a bitter chuckle as you wipe your cheeks.
“Not really,” he admits, making you smile. “So what have you tried?” he asks as he starts swaying and rocking Valerie in hopes of getting her to stop, but not even Harry’s charm stands a chance with her right now. Deep down you’re happy you weren’t the reason she got so fussy and upset, would have been pretty awkward if she stopped the moment Harry took her into his arms.
“Literally everything,” you huff, shoulders falling forward. “I went over the list Rosa gave me, tried everything, but she wouldn’t stop. She’s teething, but this is… It seems like there might be something else maybe?” you tell him worried that something serious might be behind her behavior. You really don’t want to call and bother Rosa, but you are nearing the point where you’ll give up and ask for help.
“Maybe she needs to be changed?” Harry suggests holding her up, giving her butt a sniff, but you roll your eyes at him.
“You don’t think that was one of the first things I did? She is as clean as she could be. Maybe I should just call Rosa,” you sigh in defeat reaching for your phone but Harry snaps at you.
“No! Don’t, we can figure this out. Steven has been so excited to have a night off, we can’t ruin this for them. Come on, we have to have the slightest parenting skills and solve this without them.”
Nodding you agree with him, but you’ve completely run out of ideas.
“So what do you suggest?”
You can see the gears turning in Harry’s head as he is trying to come up with a plan, but it’s not like either of you have any experience with babies. The idea of calling Rosa is starting to burn in the back of your head, fear of failing this challenge taking over your thoughts.
Then Harry looks at you with a look that screams that he has an idea. You’re just about to ask what came into his mind when all of a sudden he starts to sing.
“Well, sometimes I go out by myself and I look across the water, and I think of all the things what you’re doing and in my head I paint a picture…”
You instantly recognize Amy Whinehouse’s iconic song, the one that’s also behind Valerie’s name, you know that for sure. Rosa was obsessed with the song growing up, she would sing it on the way to school, in the shower or while making dinner. You weren’t surprised she chose this name for her first daughter.
What surprises you that Harry sings like a literal angel. He hits the notes perfectly, nailing the lines like not many can and you listen to him with parted lips, eyebrows raised. This was the last thing you expected from him, but then again, it’s not the first time Harry has surprised you through the years of knowing him.
Valerie stops for a moment, her hiccups shaking through her body as her tear-filled eyes look up to Harry, and you both think this is gonna be the moment when she finally calms down, but he doesn’t even reach the chorus before she starts crying again, a defeated sigh erupting from him.
“Maybe she wants it instrumental,” you suggest and Harry gives you one of those ‘are you fucking kidding me?’ looks as you leave to run down the hallway, right into your bedroom.
“How am I supposed to make it instru-- what the hell, Y/N?!” He gives you a weirded out look when you return with a guitar in your hands. “Since when do you play the guitar?”
“Since like… eighth grade,” you tell him as you sit on the couch and holding the guitar on your lap you try to find the right accords. “I told you, you know nothing about me.”
Harry nods with a surprised but amazed look on his face as your fingers strum against the chords. It takes a few minutes but you figure it out and glancing up you give a questioning look to Harry.
“From the start?” you ask and he nods his head, continuously bouncing up and down to try to calm Val down.
You start playing the song and soon enough Harry joins you with the singing, the two of you perfectly nailing it even without any practice.
“Stop makin’ a fool out of me, why don’t you come on over, Valerie?”
Maybe it’s the guitar, maybe it’s the singing or maybe the fact that the song has her name in it, but by the time you reach the halfway point in the song Valerie’s crying slowly starts to fade. You instantly share a look with Harry, but don’t stop, fearing that she might start again if the music stops.
Her tear soaked cheeks smooth out as she is not screaming anymore and you can actually see her irises finally, her long lashes are sticking together from the salty tears and you know it’s gonna take some time for her to regain her normal state, but at least the crying has stopped.
“‘Cause since I’ve come on home, well, my body’s been a mess. And I’ve missed your ginger hair and the way you like to dress…”
You tear your eyes off Valerie for a second, letting yourself wander over Harry’s features as he sings. He slightly furrows his eyebrows focusing on the lines, so his forehead has a few creases on it. His lips form the words so clearly and elegantly, you wonder how often he sings. Is it something he only does when he is on his own or he likes to perform as well?
The only time when you heard him sing was at the bar when the two of you slayed the karaoke machine with that Avril Lavigne song. You were smashed by then, you remember that he had a nice voice but it was the last thing you paid attention to. Besides, he was kind of equally drunk as you, it was all for just fun, but now is a completely different situation.
It’s no surprise Valerie finds his voice soothing, you’d probably stop whatever you were doing if you heard him sing. There are people with a good voice and then there are the ones that not just have a good voice but also that small something, that extra magic in them that makes you melt as their voice caress your ears. Harry is definitely the second case, for a moment you forget where you are or why he is there singing. It’s just his voice and the gentle strumming of your fingers on the chords.
At the end of the song he starts repeating Valerie as the song slowly fades into nothing and you both stare at the little girl in his arms, clearly afraid she might start crying again. Unfortunately, your reservations become valid when you see the corners of her mouth curls down and you and Harry share a shocked look immediately.
“What else can you play?” he urges as Val whimpers in his arms, letting you know she does not appreciate that the singing has stopped.
“Shit, shit! Um, something from ABBA?” you propose and Harry nods quickly, not even asking which song you know, so you take it as a sign that he probably knows all of them.
The first song that comes to your mind is Andante, Andante and you don’t hesitate to start playing again, just in time. Valerie was just about to start crying again, but as soon as the melody hit her little ears she calmed down and listened to it with tired looking eyes.
“Take it easy with me, please. Touch me gently like a summer evening breeze…” Harry sings the words and you can’t hold a smile back as he, once again, hits the notes just perfectly without missing a beat.
You’re convinced there’s not one person on Earth who has never heard a single Abba song, most of the population knows them by heart, but somehow you couldn’t really imagine Harry to be a person who knows the lyrics to the songs as well. But he does and sings it without messing it up even just once. It’s hard to imagine a younger version of Harry singing ABBA songs when they come on the radio, but the more you think about it the more the picture paints itself in your mind.
Valerie lays her head to Harry’s chest, stuffing her thumb into her mouth as she listens to the performance. She is probably enjoying the vibrance of his voice shaking through his chest and maybe this is what brings her the peace she’s been looking for all this time. Your heart skips a beat at the sight of them.
Harry glances at you, eyes so soft you melt under his gaze. However nerve wrecking it was to have Valerie scream for hours, she is still the cutest little thing ever as she rests her head on his chest, her long blinks giving it away she has definitely lost most of her energy.
You don’t dare to stop the singing and playing. When you near the end of a song you quickly think of something else and whisper it over to Harry, who then gives his feedback on it with either a nod or a shake of his head. Most of the time he knows the songs you suggest so the show continues without a stop.
Half an hour passes by when you see her eyes slowly closing. You still don’t stop though, only when Harry tries to listen to her breathing and he realizes that it was completely slowed down. She is out.
“Holy shit,” you breathe out quietly, your fingers feeling numb from the playing. You haven’t had a guitar in your hands for this long in a while, probably for years. Harry shares your relief, his throat has completely dried out and he is happy to finally breathe evenly, not just sneak a few breaths in between lines.
“And now what?” he mouths as he is still gently swaying around with the sleeping Valerie in his arms. You put the guitar aside and check if she is for real asleep. Her long lashes are spread out on her puffy cheeks, gently snoozing into Harry’s chest as if she weren’t screaming for dear life just an hour ago.
“Let’s put her down,” you whisper and nod at him to follow you.
Reaching your bedroom you only switch your bedside lamp on so the light doesn’t wake her up. Pushing the stuffed animals to the side you grab the blankets and let Harry do the critical job. Leaning down he oh so slowly starts to pull her away from his chest, careful not to move too suddenly, it all feels like in those action movies when they are trying to get through the lasers without triggering the alarm. One bad move and the screaming threatens to start again and that’s the last thing you want, after all you’ve done to calm her down.
You don’t even realize it but as you watch her little head reach the mattress you hold your breath, almost wincing upon seeing Harry’s hands slide out from under her sleeping frame. As if you wait for something to go wrong, both of you freeze for a moment, expecting her to start moving around and wake up, but she stays still.
Eyes snapping up to Harry, you exchange a look and then you both head to the door, careful not to make any noise that can possibly shake Valerie up from her dreams.
“This was more tiring than running a marathon,” he huffs, throwing himself to the couch and you do the same next to him.
“Have you ever run a marathon?”
“No,” he confidently answers and you look over at him with a puzzled look. “But I can imagine how tiring it is.”
You let out a chuckle, letting your eyes close for just a little bit. You haven’t even had the chance to realize how much this whole struggle with Val sucked the energy out of you, but now that you’re half lying on the couch it hits you all at once.
“I should get going,” you hear Harry mumble, clearly just as tired as you are, but he doesn’t move.
“Mhm,” you hum, feeling yourself drift to sleep.
Neither of you moves and it doesn’t take a whole five minutes for the both of you to completely doze off.
The next time you wake up you feel an arm curled around your waist and someone is definitely pressed up against you while your back is against the back of the couch. It takes you a couple of moments and some blinking to realize it’s Harry you are all snuggled up to and the reason why you woke up is because Valerie is crying again.
“Shit,” you mumble to yourself, mind still groggy from the sleep as you push yourself up on the couch. Just moments later Harry’s eyes flush open and you’re not sure it’s because of the crying or because you moved next to him. His arm slides off you as he looks around a little confused about his surroundings.
You don’t have the chance to think about how the two of you ended up cuddling on the couch, though it lingers in the back of your mind. Basically crawling over Harry you rush into your bedroom where Valerie is lying in her bed crying. It’s a different kind of cry, not like the one you were stuck with for hours before and you know she must be hungry.
“Ah, come on, little girl. It’s alright,” you coo at her scooping her into your arms. She immediately cuddles to your chest hiccupping against it, her little hands fisting your shirt. You leave to go to the kitchen and feed her, but just as you’re about to step out of the room you bump into Harry.
You bounce back from his chest, but his hand immediately reaches for you and grabs your arm, holding you in case you might fall back.
“Sorry,” you breathe out, thoughts still foggy a little. “She’s… hungry,” you explain, but he is standing so close to you, you can feel his body’s warmth and it instantly ignites the memory of being pressed against his side on the couch just moments ago and you can’t stop yourself from inhaling a shaky breath.
“Let me help,” he croaks out and the two of you walk into the kitchen. Putting on her bib you hand her over to Harry who sits with her on his lap on a stoop as you get the baby food, warm it a little before joining the two of them and you slowly start feeding her.
“What time is it?” you ask realizing you have no idea how long you two have been asleep on the couch.
“It’s three am,” Harry answers before smiling down at Val. “Good job, Val!” he hums watching her take the spoon into her mouth.
You finish up feeding her, then give a try at burping her even though Rosa said it’s not necessary anymore. She just hums to herself so you head back to the bedroom, her eyes already threatening to close. By the time you put her back to the bed she is out again, so no private show is needed this time.
Walking out of the room you see Harry putting on his shoes and coat. For a split second you feel disappointed that he is leaving, but then your rational side puts you to your place. Of course he is leaving! Val is fine now, there’s no other reason for him to stay, right?
“Harry,” you softly say and he looks at you. “Can you please not tell Rosa and Steven that I needed help with Val?” you quietly ask, though there’s no doubt your eyes are practically begging him.
“No way I’ll ever admit to Steven that I sang ABBA to his child, so don’t worry about it,” he chuckles making you smile as well.
“Thank you. And for helping me as well. I was really close to giving it up,” you admit folding your arms on your chest as Harry stands at the front door, hand on the door knob as he is looking back at you.
“No problem. Now you owe me one,” he smirks and you can’t hold yourself back from rolling your eyes.
“Sure,” you say with an airy chuckle. “Good night, Harry.”
“Good night, Y/N,” he smiles at you sweetly before opening the door and walking out.
You take his place at the door and watch him walk down the eerily quiet hallway. He turns back to you one last time waving in your way and you nod back smiling before he disappears around the corner.
Closing the door you lean your back against it, taking a deep breath. Your eyes wander over to the couch where you and Harry were sleeping not so long ago. The feeling of his arm around you is still burned into your mind and you breathe in shakily as a memory snaps into your head of the exact same thing, only years earlier.
You lied almost exactly like that in his hotel room that night. His strong arms wrapped around you as you had your head laid on his chest, listening to his heartbeat that was slightly faster than the normal. Though you were still quite drunk, this feeling imprinted into your memories, because you felt so safe with him. Like nothing could ever hurt you if he was there with you.
Unfortunately, that feeling faded into nothing when you woke up in the morning quite fast. But this time, instead of disappointment and disgust, the only thing you still feel is the emptiness at the lack of his touch.
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So, I already talked about this with @missmorwen and I know I don’t have the time to draw and make an actual comic out of it, BUT I cannot stop thinking about this SamSteve-post-engdame-fix-it story (with a dash of BuckyNat, ‘cause that’s just who I am) which is kinda crack and very rom-com (a bit you’ve got mail) inspired and doesn't make much sense, because... PLOT HOLES but * sigh * I kinda wanna share at least the idea so - bear with me:
So, instead of Nat dying, Steve sacrifices his Captain America powers on Vormir and comes back as Skinny!Steve and starts running a political blog called you’ve-got-news in secret, uncovering all kinds of shady business/corruption and becoming the bane of existence of every politician and greedy CEO - but it takes a while for his friends to figure out it's him who’s running that increasingly popular blog (which the new Captain America is actually a big fan of ;)). And the way that happens is as follows:
So, Steve almost died at the end of Endgame. The idiot (affectionate) of course still wanted to fight Thanos, but even with Thor’s Hammer, he took some serious, serious injuries which led to a tough talk with Sam, Nat and Bucky
Like I imagine, that while Steve would not have any regrets whatsoever about giving up his powers, he would still need some time to come to terms with the fact that he won’t be able to participate in the action like he used to. Even though, he actually wants and knows... it’s time to ... start something new, it’s still a process. So, there he is, trying to figure out who he is without the mantle of Captain America, re-defining the way he can and will fight against bullies in the future (cause there is no way he’s gonna stop that).
And to the surprise of everyone, Steve actually doesn’t press for participating in Avenger-style-fights anymore (he still does some of the practical mission planning and shit like that) but most importantly, he starts taking up new hobbies, like cooking or old hobbies like drawing - and he seems happier than he has in a long time, and yeah maybe it’s a bit too good to be true, if Sam starts thinking about it. But, hey, Steve finally seems to be happy so -
Meanwhile, Sam still becomes the new Captain America, and Steve is there while he is adjusting, finding himself in that role. He is there when Sam needs to talk things through, and yeah, it would still be a process like in tfatws series, but ... a little bit less alone, I guess.
So, the new Captain America fights alongside Nat and Bucky - and it’s good, they work surprisingly well together, but also: those two are stuck right in the middle of a weird assassin!flirting situation (I’m imagening a lot of veeery intense staring at the other while cleaning their weapons or beating someone up, innuendos en masse, dark humour etc.). And frankly, it’s getting on Sam's nerves because they seem to be so oblivious about the whole damn thing. Neither of them is actually admitting to anything, no, they are too busy teasing him about the ‘crush’ he has developed on that mysterious dude who is running the famous political-youve-got-news-blog that gained momentum a while ago and is currently keeping all the corrupt politicians and CEOs on their toes.
So, yeah, Sam might have been caught a couple of times reading or reciting from that blog because - it has actually turned into a pretty efficient way of mobilising people to demonstrate for change and it did give him some tip-offs in regards to who the bad guy really was and yeah. But it’s not a crush... Sam just really likes reading the blog posts, okay. That dude seems pretty cool and they share the same moral code, so... whatever.
What Nat and Bucky and Steve don't know (and he’ll never tell them), is that Sam is actually kiiiiinda already frequently talking with the guy who runs the blog. Anonymously on both ends, of course (because for good reasons both of them are pretty careful about giving away information concerning their identities). And in a way that whole anonymity-thing makes it a lot easier to talk about stuff he finds harder to admit to the people who he knows directly. So, you could say, blog-guy has kinda become Sam's internet friend, but not his crush, no.
Honestly, the crush he is more concerned about (that he also isn't planning on telling anyone about any time soon, cause Bucky would just tease him and Nat would start scheming) is, well, it’s Steve. Because, damn, he likes their get-togethers a lot, the meals Steve's cooking are honestly to die for. They watch baseball together, they do museum-trips... And the way they can talk about (almost) everything... He just feels understood and... yeah, loved (maybe not in the way that he wishes for, but still) and it’s nice to see Steve so happy and okay, maybe it’s getting a bit out of control because Sam took Steve with him to visit Sarah and his nephews and Sarah kinda saw right through his act of ‘hey, this is my best friend’ and ‘what do you mean, I don’t have feelings- okay. Yeah maybe I do’ and told him in no uncertain terms to fucking do something about it and get his shit together.
The thing is, he’s got it bad. But Sam is also torn, because this is the best fucking friendship he's ever had and he does not want to jeopardise that. So, in the end he ends up talking about this with his Internet friend... about how he kinda has this huge crush on his best friend, and his Internet friend is like, ‘TELL ME ABOUT IT, big fucking same here UGH. And I feel like I’m being SO obvious about it all. It’s honestly embarrassing. My other best friend keeps teasing me ‘bout it and tells me to just go for it, but that guy still hasn’t managed to ask out the girl he’s interested in, so, what does he know, right?’. And Sam laughs - at least he’s not alone.
So the days go by (Sam’s pining only increases, Steve took him to a wine tasting the other night and he almost... in his drunk state... almost... but he didn’t) until one day, while blog-guy and Sam are chatting, all of the sudden the blog-guy is like, ‘Shit, I think someone's breaking into my apartment’ and then like, ‘Okay, yes they are’ - and Sam's like, ‘call 911′, and blog-guy writes back ‘mmh think I can handle them’ (and Sam’s like ‘WTF... I know way too many people with zero regards for their own well-being, myself included’)
But then blog-guy is not answering anymore, so Sam frantically calls up Nat who rushes to his flat and Sam says: ‘You need to find out where that IP adress is located ASAP - the dude with that famous blog is in danger.’
And Nat does that multitasking thing where she’s working on the problem while ribbing Sam about the fact that, apparently, Captain America's Internet bestie is that famous blog dude, and- 'Are you sure it’s not a crush?'
But after another minute, Nat sighs and is like, ‘I can't find the location, this thing is encrypted af, it’s impossible.’ Suddenly, she notices something about the setup of the encryption and-, ‘Hang on a second, it was me who set this up for someone back in 2011.′ And as she slips on her jacket, she says to Sam, ‘Come on. I know where we have to go!’
So they make their way to what turns out is Steve's (!!!!) apartment and find him in the middle of a fight against over half a dozen heavily armed people, and yeah - he’s actually doing pretty okay for himself ‘cause he outsmarted a couple of them, but also- they kind of outnumber him, so Nat and Sam get to work.
And Sam doesn't even have time to fully register what that means re:blog-guy until they have successfully defeated the bad guys. After that's done, Steve is like, ‘Thanks guys, but how the hell did you know I was in trouble? Nat... you didn’t bug my apartment, did you??’
And Nat tstsk and then she just laughs because this is priceless and OF CoURSE it is Steve who is behind that blog... (she's a bit mad at herself for not figuring it out sooner, and a bit sad that Steve didn't feel like he could tell her, and that he assumes she has is flat bugged but, also,... kinda impressed.) But then she looks at him with a warm smile on her face, shaking her head, saying, ‘No, I didn’t, Steve.’ Her gaze wanders back and forth between Steve and Sam and she humms- 'That actually makes so much sense oh my god.' So, she leaves them ‘to talk’ ;) and for Sam to explain everything’ - and then it’s just the two of them.
And Sam does explain everything and is like, 'So you're that Blog dude, erm...' He's scratching the back of his neck, cheeks flushed, 'Turns out, we've been talking for months over that blog of yours. I'm (insert-Sam’s-username-here).'- and Steve's eyes go wide and you can literally see him processing that information right then and there and he's sputtering out a light laugh, and he's like 'Hang on a second... I... umm, okay, I gotta ask. So, that best friend you've got a crush on...' Well, it’s now or never -'Is you, yeah..', Sam admits and starts, 'and....' They both laugh again and Steve nods and just says- 'yeah, it’s you, too.'
And then they kiss and yaaay, happy ending!!!
And then the epilogue would be about them having a nice dinner with Bucky and Nat a couple of months later, and the whole time, Sam and Steve are being very much in loveTM. The three guys are standing in the kitchen, while Natasha is in the bathroom and Bucky's making a funny quib about how sickeningly cute Sam and Steve are together - and Sam, well, Sam just raises his eyebrows and is like, 'You know what, you're not allowed to say anything bout that, you and Romanoff have been acting waaaaay worse over the last year. At least we got our shit together in the end, what's your excuse, you are obviously absolutely in love with her!', and of course Nat chooses that exact moment to enter the room, hand on Bucky's waist, dropping a kiss on his cheek and is like, 'What do you mean, we've been dating for 6 months?' And Steve laughs and Sam groans bc .... he loves his friends, he does, but clearly, CLEARLY they ALL have to work on their communication skills!
The End.
#samsteve#buckynat#endgame fix it#Sam Wilson#Steve Rogers#Skinny!Steve#I know it's stupid and cheesy but everything else in my life feels a bit too much at the moment so I needed something cute to think about#Seriously though if anyone wants to use this as a prompt to draw or write... please do
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