3:06 AM
I am bleeding out of my heart constantly constantly and I am staining everything and everyone
And I keep bleeding and keep wondering why everyone is always greeting me with a wince, angling themselves to avoid the worst of my mess, and leaving pulling wet and ruined shirts away from their bodies
and I keep wondering why I always feel a little empty on the inside
And I have to keep reminding myself it’s because you’re bleeding yoire bleeding you’re bleeding and there’s a special place where it all goes which is down the drain when they wash the red from their hands and you cant forget that you are just too much. You’re bleeding out of your heart all the time and you’re ruining everyone’s clothes
And I’m trying I swear. I’m trying to pull away from hugs faster and make only the lightest touches. Im trying to stay inside in my room where the only things I can ruin are my own sheets, and certainly no one cares if I stain those. I’m still marred by my own impermanence and unimportance and I just get desperate sometimes and you're always cold when your insides keep seeping out of your like they also just can't wait to get away
I guess nothing was meant to stay by my side
n.
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I still think one of the funniest experiences of my life was watching American Psycho with my sister and afterwards we both went "okay. Lets do something more lighthearted now" and put on the dubbed version of Howl's Moving Castle and we both lost our minds when we heard Howl start talking
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Me when… me when… the identity is horror. Who are you? Can you be replicated? Is that replication you? If someone looks just like you, acts like you and is interpreted by others as you, are they you? Do your thoughts count for anything? If everything you actually think stays in your head and never comes out then you die do people grieve you? Do you respond to your name or to any name?
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🥄🥄🥄 spoon boy 🥄🥄🥄
one of the consequences of re-experiencing mp100 as a real grown up is that it's making me crazy. but in a different way than it did six years ago
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This is so “I’m your only friend I’m not your only friend but I’m a little glowing friend but really I’m not actually your friend but I am”
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mods asleep post the canon serirei height difference
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(read from left to right →)
🌸 The negligible self 🌸 chapter 1, p.1 to 7
A comic based on a serirei (from mp100) fanfiction written by @homosexual-fanfiction (@/ch_am on Ao3)! Please go read the fanfic there too because it’s really good!!! T v T
I don’t know if I’ll adapt the whole story (even if I really want to!!!) so for now I’ll try to do as much as I can, starting with that first chapter (which is already entirely storyboarded)!
Thanks to Camp for allowing me to draw their story and for helping me while designing some of the settings and Aimi <333 and thank you again for writing such an awesome and inspiring story!!
You can find Camp here too: @ch-am
I hope you’ll enjoy this first bouquet of pages!!💐
Here’s the link to the fic!!
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