#that’s actually like insightful or whatever and I have trouble doing any sort of research bc I’ll just learn some fact that takes over my

[palukoo]

I should really post more insane shit on here bc fundamentally so often what I want is to be able to say things and then have people ask me for my opinions and have them listen to my extremely rambling answers that are somehow both extremely overly rigorous for the forum and lacking in the structure or research I would feel obligated to provide in almost any other context like an academic setting or shitty podcast or whatever. unfortunately I find this somewhat mortifying and have the persistent aspirations of doing said research and structuring in order to make some kind of actually decent podcast or whatever so I don’t want to just post all of my thoughts on a topic I’d like to actually properly cover in some sort of way in the future. that said. I don’t do that. so you see my predicament.

[uesp]

Theory: Todd is the sleeping Godhead that we all talk about. Also he achieved absolute CHIM

You're definitely free to come up with whatever theory on that you like, but if you're genuinely curious, I would say you're a bit off from the intended takeaway.

Trying to figure out who the Godhead is a bit of a self-defeating exercise. In fact, to get a bit ahead of the point I'm going to make, it's often easier to describe the One by what he is not. If you're looking at the rare in-series mentions of the Godhead (most of the uses of "godhead" are actually referring to more generic godhood, which is also a more modern form of "godhead"), you come up with two mentions of the Godhead, and only one of them describes the Godhead at all.

The eyes, once bleached by falling stars of utmost revelation, will forever see the faint insight drawn by the overwhelming question, as only the True Enquiry shapes the edge of thought. The rest is vulgar fiction, attempts to impose order on the consensus mantlings of an uncaring godhead.

From Waking Dreams of A Starless Sky

The Godhead is uncaring. And that is basically the depth of actual text on the Godhead. If you go with sources that did not appear in the game, you'll do a bit better, but not really to any satisfying degree. So how do we get a satisfying answer? We escape the confines of the rare and deliberately esoteric mentions of this part of the lore and look at its real-world inspiration. Speaking for myself, the best summary of this part of the lore I ever read is:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gnosticism

Sincerely, after reading that and its associated articles, I went from "wow this is all a bit complex" to "alright, this is surprisingly straightforward". To tangent slightly, while there are numerous fan writings that try to explore these concepts, and I do enjoy a lot of them, I find that some of them often have trouble expressing what it all actually means because they often restrict themselves to the trappings of TES. We're going to remove those trappings, and see if it helps.

If you want more help, here is how I mentally tie some TES lore topics to its real world counterpart.

The Godhead is the Godhead (Monad)

CHIM is Gnosis

CHIM has been described as the secret syllable of royalty. It is best understood as a state of being which allows for escape from all known laws and limitations. It is the process of reaching some sort of epiphany about the nature of the universe and one's place in it, leading to a simultaneous comprehension of the full scope of existence as well as one's own individuality.

Gnosis is the common Greek noun for knowledge. It is best known from Gnosticism, where it signifies a spiritual knowledge or insight into humanity's real nature as divine, leading to the deliverance of the divine spark within humanity from the constraints of earthly existence.

Amaranth is Emanationism

The Tower touches all the mantles of Heaven, brother-noviates, and by its apex one can be as he will. More: be as he was and yet changed for all else on that path for those that walk after. This is the third key of Nu-mantia and the secret of how mortals become makers, and makers back to mortals.

Emanationism is an idea in the cosmology or cosmogony of certain religious or philosophical systems. Emanation, from the Latin emanare meaning "to flow from" or "to pour forth or out of", is the mode by which all things are derived from the first reality, or principle. All things are derived from the first reality or perfect God by steps of degradation to lesser degrees of the first reality or God, and at every step the emanating beings are less pure, less perfect, less divine. Emanationism is a transcendent principle from which everything is derived, and is opposed to both creationism (wherein the universe is created by a sentient God who is separate from creation) and materialism (which posits no underlying subjective and/or ontological nature behind phenomena being immanent).

Anu and Padomay and their derivatives are Aeons

Lorkhan is the Demiurge

Lorkhan, the Missing God, is the Creator-Trickster-Tester deity present in every Tamrielic mythic tradition. He is known as the Spirit of Nirn, the god of all mortals. Names for versions or aspects of Lorkhan include Lorkhaj (the Moon Beast) in Elsweyr, Lorkh, the Spirit of Man, the Mortal Spirit, or the Sower of Flesh to the Reachmen, Sep in Hammerfell, Sheor in High Rock, Shor in Skyrim, and Shezarr in Cyrodiil. He convinced or contrived the Original Spirits (et'Ada) to bring about the creation of the Mundus, upsetting the status quo—much like his (figurative) father Padomay is usually credited for introducing instability, and hence possibility for creation, into the undivided universe (or the Beginning Place).

In the Platonic, Neopythagorean, Middle Platonic, and Neoplatonic schools of philosophy, the demiurge is an artisan-like figure responsible for fashioning and maintaining the physical universe. The Gnostics adopted the term demiurge. Although a fashioner, the demiurge is not necessarily the same as the creator figure in the monotheistic sense, because the demiurge itself and the material from which the demiurge fashions the universe are both considered consequences of something else. Depending on the system, they may be considered either uncreated and eternal or the product of some other entity.

The word demiurge is an English word derived from demiurgus, a Latinised form of the Greek δημιουργός or dēmiurgós. It was originally a common noun meaning "craftsman" or "artisan", but gradually came to mean "producer", and eventually "creator". The philosophical usage and the proper noun derive from Plato's Timaeus, written c. 360 BC, where the demiurge is presented as the creator of the universe. The demiurge is also described as a creator in the Platonic (c. 310–90 BC) and Middle Platonic (c. 90 BC – AD 300) philosophical traditions. In the various branches of the Neoplatonic school (third century onwards), the demiurge is the fashioner of the real, perceptible world after the model of the Ideas, but (in most Neoplatonic systems) is still not itself "the One". In the arch-dualist ideology of the various Gnostic systems, the material universe is evil, while the non-material world is good. According to some strains of Gnosticism, the demiurge is malevolent, as it is linked to the material world. In others, including the teaching of Valentinus, the demiurge is simply ignorant or misguided.

I think that by seeing these concepts side by side it will help make sense of it all. You can definitely research this further, and argue that specific parts of the lore are more directly related to other concepts, but from my limited understanding of theology/philosophy, this is a framework for understanding what the lore was based on, and the ideas that might otherwise go unconnected. If you can do better than me here, by all means, be better than me.

But this takes us to the secret question within all of this: How does this effect the setting? The answer to that is that it really doesn't. Knowing that the setting of The Elder Scrolls is the material world created by the Demiurge, separating its inhabitants from the Godhead, doesn't really change anything. After all, you can literally say the exact same thing about our world. The presence of these concepts in The Elder Scrolls setting should change how you appreciate it in roughly the same way that this school of thought existing in our own world changes your view on our setting.

If you thought this was interesting, I certainly agree with you. If you think this is all a bit too much, and don't want to think about it anymore, you won't be missing out on much by ignoring it going forward. If you want to explore different theories on this, you’re definitely free too, I hope you enjoy exploring your own thoughts on this subject.

[jarofstyles]

Fan Club III

A/N: We are glad people are enjoying this story so far, it is a bit of a slow burn but I promise things will be moving along in the next part. This part shows some increased sexual tension 😈Harry does love when girls speak different languages 😉 - n + d

send feedback and requests here

masterlist

pairing: Harry Styles x Reader

warnings: none tbh, maybe angst?

word count: 4.2k

Y/N had gotten a little giddy feeling in her stomach again when Harry had asked her to go for a coffee date. Not at her shop, but somewhere where they could talk and also be seen together. Just a nice little coffee date prompted by Jeff. This would be their first time actually hanging out on their own, it made her nervous in a good way. She’d actually get to talk to him and get to know him if he wasn’t so damn closed off. Y/N knew he’d probably be asking more questions about her, but whatever made him more comfortable. 

She showed up to the address he had given her right on time, having spotted him sitting in the corner of the coffee shop with a book. Y/N made sure to ask him about that later. He looked really cute and comfortable, casual Harry. It made her smile. 

“Hey, you.” Y/N smiled widely, genuinely excited to see him.

Harry had been nervous. Harry made the decision to try and be nicer to Y/N. So far, she hadn’t bitten at any money grabbing or fame opportunities. And while that made him scared about what the real motive was? He felt that it could be safe to be on a casual friend basis with her. She couldn’t get too close though. Not when he still dreamed about grabbing her throat and forcing her to her knees so she could suck him. Yeah. He had tried to work on that until he realized that he had to just accept it and try not to think about it too much. Thankfully today she wore a cute outfit that didn’t have her tits out. He couldn’t speak properly when they were. He respected women— of course he did. But Y/N really, really got inside his head. 

“Hi.” He closed the book and stood up, knowing it would be polite to hug her. Not that he was excited about it. He wasn’t... nope.

Y/N wrapped her arms around him and was bold enough to kiss his cheek, thinking that was appropriate. “How are you? How’s your week been?” She asked genuinely curious about how he was doing since the dinner. Of course she couldn’t find out any specifics, Harry wouldn’t let her. She had grown accustomed to him shutting her out so she sort of just expected it now. She waited for him to answer before she went to order herself a coffee and a cheese and tomato panini for lunch because she was a tad bit hungry. Y/N refused to let him pay, giving him her example of a stern look. “You paid for dinner, let me.” She pouted, just wanting to be self sufficient. 

Once they had gotten all their food bits sorted and sat down, Y/N felt the giddiness kick in. He was just so fucking handsome. She had trouble wrapping her mind around it still. To the whole world he was the most desirable bachelor and he picked her. She felt her ego inflate a little at that idea of power.

“Well.. I’ve been recording. I’m excited about the new album.” Harry said shyly. He didn’t know if she would care about it or not but so far she hadn’t given him reason to think otherwise. She had asked about it before. However, it was weird. She again insisted on paying for her own food. Wasn’t taking handouts. And it made him feel a bit more comfortable with her. Y/N was just very genuine seeming and he was confused as to what he should be thinking and feeling all the time. His mind was still split, but letting himself talk to her. “Want people to like it, but I want to like it most of all. But how is the bakery? Harry prompted, taking a bite of his own lunch. “I know that you probably have to get up early.”

Y/N’s eyes lit up, “you have?” She asked even though he had just said so. She was screaming internally because she’s been waiting for him to just do something. All the fans had no idea where he was whenever he wasn’t touring, and now suddenly they were getting content because— it made sense now. “I think people will love whatever you do, and I’m not just saying that.” She said honestly, ���you’re very good at catering to large audiences and well, people love that you just do what you do.” Y/N let herself open up as a fan a little bit, show him that she actually did care about his music. 

Y/N took a bite of her panini and nodded her head, finishing chewing before speaking. “Oh yeah... 3:30 every work day.” She chuckled, “gotta make sure everything’s prepped and ready. We are thinking of getting more staff, but it’s not in the budget yet so we are hustling.”

Harry was surprised she seemed to know anything about his work. It was a pleasant surprise though. Her compliment was sitting nice even if she was just acting about it. However it seemed pretty genuine if you’d asked him. He winced at her answer for the time she woke up, though. That was rough. 

“Christ. 3:30 is early.” He hissed. “Thought I was an early bird at 6:30, 7.” Obviously a joke, but also a seedling of truth. Harry was up very often with his sleep problems, usually only getting 3 hours at a time. It’s why he had naps. Sleeping all night long didn’t work well. “I think you’ll get there.” He encouraged. If only he could trust her enough to be like this in private. He was just so terrified of being hurt and led on again and again. The past trauma of Camille and Kendall weighed heavily on him and he knew not many others in the world would understand his heartache.

“It is super early. I hate it, but I’m committed to the quality of our baked goods. Might think of some better methods for preparing. Maybe get up at 5 instead. That would be much better.” Y/N chuckled, taking a sip of her coffee. “Thanks babe.” She responded without thinking, genuinely feeling like she could say that. They happened to be sitting in a corner which was probably something Jeff didn’t want, but if Harry felt more comfortable in a corner that’s fine. The place seemed relatively busy, not too much that they couldn’t talk, but not too little and there were people who didn’t notice. 

“But besides being a baker, I do enjoy music and movies and traveling. And you’ve done all three of those things, well, four I should say.” Y/N teased, hoping that the little bits of information that she knew didn’t seem too creepy. She didn’t want to give away just how big of a fan she was, but wanted to be relatable.

She knew? That impressed Harry too. So she did research. At least she wouldn’t be thrown in blind if people or fans asked her stuff one day. It is a little reassuring. 

“Yeah? That’s cool. Uh— I like those things too. Sometimes traveling is a lot though.” He admitted. “S’a lot when you’re super tired and have shows every night. But I mean, it’s nice. I get to see more places than I got to beforehand, it’s definitely far calmer.” Y/N seemed to understand, nodding at his words. “Where do you want to travel to?” This was going okay right? It wasn’t too personal. Just enough that it was okay if someone else heard it. He wasn’t disinterested. In fact he craved more answers from her but had to calm him the hell down. Y/N was the type that seemed to be an open book but he was sure that there was more to her than that. Things she was hiding.

For sure.

“I’m sure... but you travel for fun sometimes no?” Y/N said with a small hum, she knew he went to Jamaica for the album but also to relax. He went to Italy and to Japan. All places she loved dearly. Y/N of course would let him speak about the places he’s been himself. Maybe he would tell her something she didn’t already know.

“Greece. I’m a big history nerd and I geeked out when I went to Italy. But yeah, Greece, Egypt, and Japan.” Y/N told him, giving him a little insight on her interests. She thought it was going relatively well, still to small talk for her liking but they couldn’t really get deep over coffee could they? “I love going to Russia. My family is from there, so we go back to visit family friends every couple of years.” She told him, knowing he had never been and she had always wanted him to. “If you ever have the opportunity to go, I highly recommend it.”

Lord... if she could speak Russian Harry may cream his damn pants. He had a thing for different languages and accents. He wasn’t sure how it had started or when but he had a thing for them and they turned him on so of course she could probably speak another one. 

“That’s cool.’I’ve been to Japan a lot. S’my favorite place.” Harry loved London too, but Japan was just relaxing. No paparazzi up his ass. People far more respectful of him and his privacy. “I like Jamaica to. America can be cool. You’ll probably end up coming with me to America sooner or later. New York or LA. I prefer LA. New York is kind of chaotic and it can be really cold and bitter in the winters and it’s all concrete so the summers are brutal. But LA is cool. I have a place there.” He was giving her that little bit of information. 

“I agree, New York is a bit shit. Visited some friends there and it was just… not what I expected? London is perfect to me, I’m biased.” Y/N shrugged, pausing for a moment when he mentioned bringing her with him to America. She had to remind herself it was part of the contract. “That would be fun. I haven’t been back to America in a while.” Y/N said and took another bite of her sandwich. 

“Can you speak Russian?” Harry had to ask, he shouldn’t have even done it because if she said yes he was going to have to think about that every time he was jerking off— which was a lot lately.

Y/N was waiting for him to ask. She knew he had a thing for accents and different languages, she had a feeling he would thoroughly enjoy this bit of information and she would run with it. He had a massive fan base in Russia that had been neglected and she was excited that she’d get to represent for them too. 

“Да я говорю по—русски” Yes I speak Russian.Y/N answered fluently. “Ты наверно не думал, да?” You didn’t think, yes?

It took every bit of self control Harry had to not drag her into the bathroom and bend her over the sink. Make her speak it while he fucked her deep and had her come apart on him. That was one thing she could do to wreck him. His eyes darkened at the little smile at her sentence's end. She spoke it perfectly accented too. And Harry would be thinking all about that tonight. Half of him wanted to keep her on speed dial and have her talk as he got off. It was that much of a thing for him. 

“Oh.. that’s cool. I try and uh... I try to learn languages with every place I go to. Just a little.” He was annoyed in his head. She hadn’t even showed her tits and his cock was twitching in his pants and wanting out. Harry swore that he hadn’t jerked off this much in his whole life, but Y/N has gotten him to the point of no return.

Y/N could tell by the look in his eyes that he really liked it, smirking at him because she had found the one thing she could use against him anytime she wanted. He would never actually fuck her, but she could at least get him turned on. That was already a win in Y/N’s book. 

“That’s cute.” Y/N giggled, “I can teach you some Russian if you’d like?” She was asking more for herself. She desperately wanted him to try and speak it. For years she’d been wanting one direction to tour in Russia just so Harry could try and speak Russian. “And then, you can book a tour date in Russia and be prepared. Wow them with your skills.” She smiled, genuinely wanting him to say yes to it. There was always something really sexy about how good Harry was at accents and languages. He was a smart and talented man and she would do anything to have him balls deep in her. Too bad he wanted nothing to do with her when they were in private and he was only talking to her now because he had to.

“I would love to learn a little bit.” Harry admitted. “I like languages a lot. It’s always been intriguing to me.” He still couldn’t get over the damn woman sitting there and talking to him in Russian with the smirk on her face. Did she know it aroused him thoroughly? Because it absolutely did. More than anything. “We have been looking into tour dates for Russia, actually. It’s been difficult to plan out and timing is difficult but I’d really like to go.” He knew Y/N found it good that he did because she absolutely lit up at the confirmation that he was indeed trying for it. “I know that you’d be a good tutor. I like hearing you speak it.” Harry let that little thing slip when he hadn’t meant to but, oh well. She would know that he was into the way it sounded and maybe use it to her advantage. However... if it was whispered into his ear at the right setting, he’d lose his whole cool.

“Oh my god! That’s great wow.” Y/N smiled brightly, “okay, I’ll teach you something new every week.” She said, deciding they could work on it as their relationship progressed. Plus, Harry would actually want to talk to her if she spoke Russian to him. She found the loophole. Y/N blushed, the smirk returning to her face for a bread moment before she thought about what she wanted to teach him. “What would you like to learn how to say?” She asked curiously, “something that would come in handy on stage? Or just general conversation things?” This would be fun for the both of them and to anyone listening in, it was a casual chat between people that were dating. From the corner of her eyes Y/N could see a few people had noticed Harry was there, but they seemed to respect the fact that he was with her which was strange. They didn’t want to interrupt because it was clear they were on a date.

“Uh... basic, I think.” Harry gave her a quirked little smile. Y/N looked so excited about it too. He was honestly happy to learn but wanted to hear her talk more first. So he sat there and let her speak it to him while he got honest to god hard in his pants. His cock ached when she went over basic phrases with him and he thanked god above that he had his jacket, otherwise he would be giving the world a show. It was a weird thing to be aroused by and he knew it but... there was the way Y/N sounded saying Russian words and how she had her voice a bit huskier and spoke quiet when she did that would have him thinking about it at intimate hours. Would it be so bad to take her to his car and fuck her? Yes. Yes— that would be very bad, Harry's brain. He knew that. Still, he wanted to. Y/N was having fun giving him the phrases to repeat back, and she flushed a little when he gave them a shot.

“Okay so, if you want to say ‘hi my name is Harry’ you’d say ‘previet menya zahvoot Harry’” Y/N started, chuckling a bit at his amused face. “I think that one is pretty simple.” She was getting far too excited about this, she had been waiting to hear him speak Russian for years. “‘How are you’ is also easy it’s, ‘kak di—la’ and to say ‘I’m good’ you’d say, ‘oo menya f’suwa harasho’” Y/N smiled, knowing it was a lot to take in but she slowed it down for him and guided him through it. He was a really quick learner and it made her horny as well hell  just listening to him. 

The hot part about this was that she was correcting him and he was saying things and just giving her these looks. There was a tension building up that Y/N was positive other people could see. Y/N could truly spend all her time sitting here talking to Harry, too bad they’d have to go back to barely speaking. Y/N was hopeful that maybe he would be okay with talking to her now that they had hung out on their own and had a bit of their own fun? Maybe this would be the start of something new and exciting.

“This is hard. I love it though.” Russian was definitely harder than Italian or Spanish which Harry knew bits of. But it was hot. Watching her mouth round over the sounds and her talk quieter and giggle at his mispronunciations.. it was incredibly arousing and he knew that he had to stop. He may mess his damn pants. “Thank you.” He smiled at her, taking her smaller hand and holding it in his. He would tell himself that it was so people could see and take photos but he knew that deep down, he just wanted to hold her soft little hand. Feel how warm it was. “Hm. You’re very warm.” He commented. Where else was she warm? Harry bet there were tons of places that he could find that would be even warmer than this. “I can’t wait to impress the Russian crowd with ‘previet menya zahvoot Harry’” He teased. “Honestly though... helps me connect with them that much more. Some don’t speak much English. And it’s cool to be able to make them feel good.”

Y/N felt like she was on fire, genuinely building tension with Harry that she knew no one could deny. Not even Harry if he protested. There was something about her speaking a different language that just opened up a new avenue they hadn’t been down before. If they weren’t careful they’d never come back. 

“I think it’s really sweet. You definitely do make their lives when you try and connect with them. It’s a step farther than most.” She reminded him. Harry was really good to his fans and really did love them. It made her heart swell because she was technically one of them, but he didn’t really know that. She wished she could tell him but part of her thought he wouldn’t be cool with it as even Jeff hasn’t told him yet. Y/N moved her other hand to play with his rings, tracing over them slowly whilst they spoke. Maybe she was desperate for touch, but god did it feel nice to just hold his hand and have him look at her the way he was looking at her.

Harry had to stop— really, he knew that much. But he couldn’t. Not when Y/N really had him by the balls when she spoke like that. Her hand felt good and he couldn’t deny that physically? There were tons of things he should be doing, but he was thinking about laying her over the table and licking from between her thighs all the way up to her tits. That would be lovely. 

“I hate to cut this, love. I’ve got to go to the studio.” He said quietly. He really did hate to cut this. He wanted to talk more and listen to her and watch her eyes roll over him. Harry didn’t think Y/N was faking her attraction to him. “I’ll get to see you tomorrow morning at the bakery, yeah?” He squeezed over her hand reassuringly. If only he could truly trust her. It hasn’t been that long yet, though. He couldn’t do that. Harry needed to keep his guard up. This heavy flirting was okay right now but he couldn’t let it get that bad alone. He was going to be okay alone but when she aroused him he was going to have to back off.

Y/N frowned a bit when he said he had to go but understood. He was busy and well, she’d just go back home and relax the rest of the day. Maybe she would go online and see what people were saying? She’d been MIA on her fan account and people probably connected the dots by now.

“Alright, I’ll walk out with you.” She spoke, getting up and slipping on her jacket. London was quite chilly this time of year but not too cold. You could wear what you wanted as long as you have a bit of a jacket to wear just in case. Y/N led the way out of the coffee shop and he followed, she could sense eyes on her already. There weren’t any paps outside but there were a few fans that took pictures on their phones. “I’ll see you tomorrow then.” Y/N hummed as she turned to look at him, waiting for him to respond before going in for a hug as usual. Y/N was giddy after their little date today, she wasn’t sure how he felt about her. She was convinced today was genuine but for all she knows it could be a lie.

Harry hugged her back, kissing the top of her head for extra measure. Mainly because that deep part of him wanted his lips on her anywhere he could get and that was a safe spot. It made him feel so off because she fit right in his arms. Perfectly nestled there, her face in his chest, it was perfect for him. She would have to go up on her tiptoes to kiss him or he would have to bend down but he likes that. Harry felt weird going to leave. One last squeeze, he gave her a parting smile. 

“Course. Please put extra lemon bars in there for me, sweetheart.” 

Y/N hummed at the kiss on the forehead, pulling back with a wide smile. “Of course I can babe, have a good day. Can’t wait to hear all about it.” She spoke to him, desperately wanting to lean in and kiss him but she couldn’t. Not yet anyway. She made her way back to her flat, feeling really smiley and giddy. She took precaution to make sure people didn’t really notice her. Y/N was just thankful her building had multiple entrances. 

------

Online, fans were freaking the fuck out. A video a fan took was circulating as well as photos of them inside the cafe. 

‘Oh my god look at him. He NEVER does this. He’s holding her hand, and he’s looking so deeply at her I can’t—’

‘The way he’s holding her. My god I want to die.’

‘THE KISS ON THE FOREHEAD... PLEASE WHO IS THIS GIRL I WANT WHAT SHE HAS!!’

‘Wait.. who is this girl? She isn’t famous right?’

Y/N logged on to see all the photos and it made her gooey. Harry was looking at her with those loved up eyes and they just looked so happy together. These poor fans were lapping it all up. Y/N desperately wanted to comment, but she chose not to. She’d wait for Jeff’s directions. If the fans knew she had a fan account it would only cause them to look back and see the years worth of Harry obsessed tweets she had. Y/N wished she could share the feeling of hugging Harry with every single fan on her timeline. They deserved it.

Harry logged in to look too. They were taking a break at the studio and he was genuinely shocked at how he looked at her. He played the part well. Almost too well. She did too, to be fair. They both looked so loved up and happy and Harry's smile was devilish in the way that people probably could tell he was incredibly attracted to her. He could tell, anyways. But he hadn’t seen photos of himself like this before— never allowed himself to be open with someone. 

The pictures of their hug are what got him though. It looked natural. Very natural. Like it was meant to happen. If he had seen them on the street as an outsider he would probably coo internally. Holy fuck. He sat back on the couch and threw his hand over his eyes. What the hell was he going to do now? He needed to be nice to her, but he didn’t know how to do that and also not being her back to his place and fuck her for a good 3 days straight.

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[part 4]

A/N: Harry’s character in this is a bit of a dog but... he means well? buckle up for the next part hehe 😈- n + d

let us know what you think!

masterlist

[ornamental-coral]

Do you have houses combos you love besides Snake Bird ?

Hi sorry it’s take me so long to get to you ‘nonnie human you. I promise if anyone sends me questions, I will get to them eventually! It just takes a while for me thinking about them, researching about them (doing Birdy Bird things with even a one-sentence question...), forgetting I have a sort-hat-chats centered tumblr account (which is... can sort of a Bird thing but also a me thing), and then coming back so we are here (there. somewhere)

I myself am a Snake-Bird. I think I’m pretty neat. Birds are usually very good at entertaining themselves. I think. And I’m lucky I like myself enough because I spend a lot of time with me haha.

I’m a little in love with a remarkable amount of Lion primaries, Snake secondaries and Bird primaries (especially with a Snake secondary to make them extra hard to hold onto *rolls eyes) and apparently I love writing Badger Primaries? I guess I find the challenge of building an “ideal” society that is willing to address the current failings of our timeline a worthwhile challenge and my ink-children rise from the ether to meet me.

I’ve expanded below bar because this is actually a really interesting concept to me - how does a particular house combination react to the others. Below is just my meandering through how specifically My Snake Primary Bird secondary might react on a surface level to the other house types. This doesn’t mean I’m right. There are as many ways of acting within the house system as there are human beings and keep in mind, this is all in good fun.

____________________

Lions

The Idealism of the Lion Primary is something that I find admirable. I posted a more extended musing on the position of Snake Birds within media here. I think the Snake in me understands that when you pick up a person the way Snakes do, you pick up a lot of their wants and regrets too. Snakes pick up People, so that means the whole package. A Lion with a worthy cause can be a very attractive thing to a Snake, who will follow and support them in a very specific kind of way. 

With Double Lions, and Lion Snakes there’s that urge to run after them with a fire-extinguisher in one hand and a big stick in the other - one to put out the fires a Double Lion inevitably lights and the Lion Snake may try purposefully to stoke, and the other to beat off anyone who dares to tell your Lion that they cannot Be A Lion. That’s something only the Snake can do, and that’s only because no matter what the Snake says, the Lion is still Their Person warts and all and the Snake Bird knows damn well what they were getting into, or at least thought they did.

Lion Birds house-match secondaries with Snake Birds but can have explosively different moral codes, largely because they method match. I personally find some Lion Bird characters a little grating because as the audience, I feel I’m getting the same information as the Lion, but as a Snake I have a little too much self-preservation to imagine myself doing anything much about it - at least not the way a majority of Lion Bird characters act - or I come to different conclusion. I also hate conspiracy theories because they require leaps of logic the my Bird model typically just can’t tolerate but the felt-house Lion will participate in. However, Lion Birds can also be the hard-boiled PIs, the Best-at-their-Job secret agents (hi Agent Coulson), the one who has Seen the World and Still Believes It Can Be Saved. So that’s admirable and fun.

Lion Badgers are sweet but my Snake Bird goes “fires, fires everywhere”. And like, not the kind your Lion Snake might think is funny when the Snake Bird tries to put them out. Think Steve Rodgers. MCU Steve has a really strong Snake Performance though when it comes to Bucky which MY Snake finds really confusing because it is So Strong I’d be willing to be money he would have at least tried to find a better way to get rid of the Tesseract if Bucky hadn’t fallen from that train and been declared KIA. I think that particular type of Snake performance also confuses Tony, which is part of why Civil War was the way it was.

But yeah, a fire that a Lion Badger wants to light? it’s not going to go out. For a Snake, having that as Your Person means you either really ride or die for them - and might actually literally have to die, or you are keeping them from burning themselves out before they accomplish whatever they’re doing. For a Snake Bird? this is alarming as hell and it’s a fight between the Secondaries to make sure the Lion takes care of themselves as part of the Lion’s “hard work” Badger, if they’re your person.

Birds

Bird primaries will “build” the people they love into the way they see the world. As a Snake, I think this is just really appealing to me? Snakes are loyal, and older Snakes have the life experience to realize that - painful as it is - this loyalty will not always be reciprocated in the way you hope for (this is the stereotypical bone of contention between Lions, Badgers and Snakes. Lions are focused on their cause and if the Snake’s protective instincts get in the way of that, that causes problems It also hurts when a Lion’s mission supersedes their affection for their Snake people. Badgers’ concerns are for their communities and the split of attention can drive the individually focused Snake crazy). If you get built into the Bird’s world, that always felt like something special and something that took hard work, which made it all the more valuable.

My Snake Birds also likes to imagine it’s equipped to learn to the things that a Bird variety believes in and address those things. It’s the kind of relationship that has the potential to go very wrong, and I do realize that. I think Snake Birds have the tendency to want to be everything for Their Person (or people) and our powers of observation mean that we take it a little personally when we’ve missed something. I’m tempted to call Kaz Brekker of Six of Crows a Snake Bird and it drives him to distraction that he can’t be everything, everywhere, all at once to the handful of a people he truly and deeply cares about.

The Bird Snake in particular house matches in a way that can be particularly challenging and attractive to a Snake Bird? A Snake Bird’s tool is, well, the Bird, and the whole persona can feel ridiculously pleased by being able to “pin down” the Bird Snake, which does not necessarily lend itself to being pinned. There’s also this strong urge to understand the Bird Snake. 

So there’s the Snake secondary who delights in finding new ways to be, and a Bird Secondary delights in learning new things. The discovery element in that relationship can, as long as the Bird Secondary is not stifled by the Snake Primary’s concern, actually be really rewarding. Birds, and Bird Snakes in particular are also often really unique. They think differently, act differently, can be off putting to certain types of house combinations because their moral code can come off is so blue-orange, and is Built on top of that. Snakes take great pride in being very “this is my Person and their brand of weirdness is just another thing I love about them. And on top of that, I Know them.” with their people in any situation, and if a Snake can eventually prove to their Bird Primary that that feeling is unwavering, that’s a relationship that becomes central to both Snake and Bird.

That isn’t to say Birds can’t go dark, but usually they learn to be that way given Birds are evidence-gatherers. Unfortunately, this means I love them too because people of my generation and all generations before and hence have a thing for characters with trauma (see Loki, greasy prince extraordinaire).  It’s -- it’s never not been a thing. Take a look at freaking Gilgamesh, which is the oldest things that we know of, look at Enkidu, and tell me he wasn’t your favorite. Gilgamesh is kind an arschloch of highest proportions. As a more palatable example of this Bird-villain thing, I sort of suspect Bucky Barnes is a Bird of some flavor. If he killed one person as the Winter Soldier, he’d feel bad but probably admit it was the brain washing - but he did it dozens of times. He wonders what does this say about him? He is possibly a Badger, but even pre-winter-soldier he doesn’t seem to care on as wide a scale as a Badger typically does. Steve is Built into the fabric of his world, and he doesn’t react to Steve’s death the way I expect a Snake to either. Maybe a really Old Seasoned Snake and I mean technically he’s old? but the cryogenics thing sort of means he’s not old enough to just let it go. He also doesn’t follow the boy from Brooklyn for reasons I would expect from a fellow Snake but I guess the new show might give more insight on that once I actually watch it.

Badgers

Okay, I like writing Badgers. [Leans back on chaise lounge] this probably has something to do with my mother.

Really though. I model Badger because my mother, although I love her and I’m really lucky to have her, is a teeny tiny bit horrified by Snake tendencies and drilled into me the morality that it is okay and it is above all Good to care about other people (for other Snakes, read Yes Even Strangers). To be fair, the prioritizing that Snakes do (which can get as focused as ”My people first, even if someone else far away is in trouble and I am acutely aware of it”) can seem pretty horrific to a Badger. They don’t necessarily get how you could believe everyone is a person and just... not care. And it’s hard to convince a Badger (for whom not acting can = they are not worth it) that you know exactly what you’re doing but are also aware that if you try to help everyone your head will explode because you can’t keep that many People up there. It’s why Snakes have their rings of caring.

But the result is that for me, Badgers are usually the ones left standing at the end of the story. If they’re done dirty, I like to try and fix it.

I don’t like how media treats Badger primaries generally though? There’s often something “goofy” or the Badger is treated as soft in a really unpalatable way. I mean, and to be fair this directly comes from the way a Snake can sort of be flummoxed with the way Badgers just do things for strangers, yes Badgers irl may be considered gentle. On an individual level, they are often the hearts and hearths of groups and homes.  But there’s this weird place where The State is supposed to be a Badger-shaped institution, so that uneasy balance comes out in weird ways.

I don’t remember who said it, but the difference with Badgers and Snakes is that, with a Snake, you start out at Zero. You’re human, but you’re not the Snake’s human, so I will treat you like a human, but there are My People above you. And with a Badger, you sort of start out at like 85-100%? At least this is my perception. Badgers need-base and that off-balances Snakes.

A Snake with a Badger in my opinion needs to be “eyes open” in a different way than even a Snake with a Bird does, because the Snake needs to understand that the Badger is going to look and act similar - until they don’t, and then the Snake needs to be able to put aside the part of them that was attracted to the mirrored morality and actually work with the Badger to figure out what the Snake needs and how the Snake can in turn support the Badger.

Anyways though, I’m writing a thing where a Badger Bird-modeling-Badger is the last woman standing, committed to fixing a broken type of organization that her Snake, Bird, and Lion companions are Tired of. Lady Badger is nothing if not resilient. I’m writing another thing where a really really Burnt Badger man gets a safe place to learn to be part of a community that is meant to be mutually protective again (he dies because this is a fan work and that’s what happened in cannon, and this is arguably because he’s still unburning at that stage and doesn’t Have a proper community, but I hope to show him having at least Some happy times because in the sh**show show he didn’t have any at all). I’ve got a slightly less developed thing where a number of Badger performing princes learn to work together to fix their kingdom and unbury the history that created it. 

Aaand It’s nearing midnight, I have clearly lost the thread of the thread or whatever

Goodniiight to all my houses. Love you all even if I didn’t write about you here.

-Ornamental

[axemetaphor]

im definitely not ripping off my friend by making a list of au ideas i have no siree //gonna slap this under a readmore cause i. well i say a lot. all of the time. i tried so hard to format this Good but tumblr fucked me up i am so sorry

so first-off i know i already have one WIP AU (Auckland) on ao3 so i wont talk about That one cause like. spoilers. i actualyl have it like 80% created so its likely gonna truly get finished for once and i dont wanna ruin shit

the other one ive posted about is something me and ben (catgirlrepublic) have worked on together its not at all close to done or anything but it's. a fun little crossover. Between jdate and my fuckinuhm. Original characters story “Untitled Villains Project”. the sketches of the comic version ive started is actually my pinned post 👉👈 its like the first chunk of the story, i think half of part 1? yea.

Tldr john fucking Somehow is able t oget into contact with a certain curious scientist from another reality who’d just love to study the Soy Sauce, most certainly not for her own nefarious purposes

John and Dave meet up with the scientist, her name is Boss, and her lab assistant, Toxic, and after a bit of a preliminary Vibe Check where john determines her trustworthy (which Dave doesnt agree with,) the two agree to be taken to the world UVP is set in. from there they stay in Boss’s lab (big old fucking abandoned military lab). John and Toxic are fast friends due to mutual love-of-chaos. John n Dave get to fuckin, camp out on an air mattress.

The day after they arrive, the two get split up, not exactly intentionally; big plot points of UVP are liek. Fueled by Boss sending Toxic to go fetch her “research materials,” which are usually important artifacts

Fuckin side note i guess i have to explain my dumb bullshit: Boss’s, uh, field of expertise so to speak is actually fckin, basically the scientific study of magic and superpowers n shit like that. This shit’s all real in that world. Toxic’s got fuckin superpowers, so do 4 other main characters, whatever. It’s got a bit to do with spirituality, iss Boss’s hypothesis. So she has Toxic fetch important artifacts that might have “energies” to them. The thing is actually way more fuckin complictated than that, this is just Boss’s initial hypothesis.

Motherfucking anyways. So Boss gives Toxic a job to do, and John get excited about how Cool that sounds, and ends up going with Toxic, leaving Boss and Dave alone. Neither is thrilled about this. But Dave and Boss get to have a bit of conversation (while Toxic and John are off bonding and having a good time) and come to a… mutual grudging understanding of some kind. They still dont like each other though lmao

Theres gonna be deeper shit going on but we havent sorted it out yet/tbh havent like Written For It in a while but i still like thinking about it a lot lol

Also pretty sure our endgame is john and dave steal toxic and bring them back with em lmao boss is kind of not nice and toxic would most certainly be better off in Undisclosed. Actually theyd fucking love it. Theyd become a local cryptid im sure. Undisclosed’s mothman is a teleporting spike baby.

I have. Another crossover AU that i might. Post something about for halloween? Maybe? If i have it finished?

Crosses over into, you guessed it, another one of my original-character projects. God, am i vain or something?

I promise this is just because i think blue and dave should get to team up to beat up some monsters

Quick briefing on my fuckinuh. Original character story, this one doesnt have a name (yet? Idk lol my work never actually goes anywhere sso who gives a shit). It centers around two grim reapers, Red (26, bi woman) and Blue (22, aroace agender asshole). In this reality or whatever, grim reapers function kind of like low-level office workers. They get told who’s going to die + when by some middle-management types, and upper management only involve themselves when punishment needs to be doled out. These Higher-Ups can be seen as analogous to Korrok; they’re decidedly not human, never were, and fucking terrifyingly powerful. Additionally, grim reapers are sort of .. designed to be “background noise” people. In reality theyre supernatural beings and, uh, look Real Fuckin Weird (the whole deal has a neon aesthetic im terrible at drawing uwu) but most humans just perceive them like extras in a movie. A body’s there but the camera’s not focused on it.

To the narrative: the shit starts when Red n Blue get relocated to Undisclosed. Relocation is something that just happens every now and then to reapers; they usually work in teams, but they get split up into different cities to avoid any strong bonds forming (a counter-union strategy from the Higher-Ups).

Red, Blue, John and Dave end up running into each other for the first time in a McDonalds where John n Dave are getting some 4am “hey, we just survived another horrific monster fight” celebration burgers. John and Dave are the only two people who can see how… strange Red and Blue are. Nobody else notices.

John unintentionally pisses Blue off, leading to Blue whacking him upside the head with a dildo bat. They all four get kicked out of McDonald’s. Dave and Red both are less than thrilled

Blue and John end up resolving their differences, somehow. Red and Dave briefly bond over their dumbass best friends being, well, dumbasses. They all part ways amicably.

somehow-or-other (idk yet) they end up running into each other a few more times, and eventually john invites them over to his place, and the four (plus Amy now!) get to know each other a little better

while there, Blue gets a text about some guy who's gonna die and John offers to drive them to where that's gonna go down. they take him up on the offer and get to have a bit of one-on-one conversation

after that ordeal though Blue has had Enough of people and bails, leaving John to head home alone

theres a sort of mirror-development going on with the five of em. Red, John, and Amy would all like everyone to get along, though theyre a bit tentative about it (John moreso than the other two, actually, jsut cause. well Red n Blue could still be Sauce Monsters). Dave and Blue on the other hand do Not like people enough for this shit, and Dave's not unconvinced theyre Sauce Monsters. he will not trust them until proven he should

the story's kinda nebulous but i got an idea for some Shit going down that involves both Sauce Monsters and also the Higher-Ups to have some fuckin absolute chaos go down.

Oops! All Trans

Everybody is transgender. Everyone

Ive actually workshopped this one both with ben (catgirlrepublic) and ghost (ghost-wannabe) lmao its a fun lil concept ive had from the get-go cause i mean. What’s an internet tran gonna do other than hit all their favourite media with the Everyone’s Trans beam

Dave transitioned post-high school and faked his death for it. People go missing in Undisclosed all the damned time, after all. He moved to the next city over, transitioned fully, then came back as a completely new man. Yes i know this doesnt exactly fit with the “everyone knows David from high school” thing alright, hush.

Anytime anyone brings up John’s old best friend (pre-transition Dave) John throws an entire fit like an overdramatic grieving widow. Full-on sobbing “why would you bring her up?! I miss her so much—” to the point that people just stop bringing up because Jesus Christ That Sure Is Uncomfortable KJHGFDS.

This is a scheme he and Dave came up with prior to Dave leaving, though Dave hadnt exactly anticipated John putting on this much of a performance about it— but it’s stopped Dave from ever having tto hear his deadname again, so hey.

Amy transitioned sometime in middle school/early high school. Her family was super supportive and loved her a ton and most people just know her as Amy. she was super shy her whole life really so. Yeah. people just dont think to bring it up lmao also i Feel Like big jim would absolutely wallop anyone who gave her trouble of any kind

John’s nonbinary (genderfluid specifically) and not exactly Interested in transitioning ? like hes fine with how he is. mostly.

he came out to Dave in high school but hes not out to anyone else exactly. Maybe his bandmates. Probably any other trans person in Undisclosed knows, too, cause theyre safe to tell lmao. Johns mostly a “he/him out of convenience” kinda nb who’s cool with any pronouns but does prefer they/them most. Dave and Amy use they/them when the trio are alone

Also this is a totally self-indulgent caveat that i think would be great, Dave’s actually agender but because he's transmasc and transitioned when he thought there were really only two options, and being Boy at least felt less weird than being Girl, he just kind of assumed he was a dude. It’s only through a lot of (like fucking years and years hes probably in his 30s/40s when he puts 2 and 2 together on this one) talks about gender with John that he realizes he actually feels like No Gender. Masc aesthetic with none gender.

I Just Think It’d Be Neat Is All Okay

Also Amy came out to Dave about being trans early on in them seeing each other and his response was to get very nervous before blurting out “me too” and then just being too embarrassed to talk about it for the rest of the day. Hes got a lot of hangups on talking about it actually it takes years for him to get comfortable in that

by contrast when Amy comes out to John about it his response is to yell “EYYY ME TOO” and give her a big ol hug lmao

I think itd be neatt if Amy ran a like. Transfem help/advice blog on tumblr. Kind of helped-with by John who can give her transfem nb insight for certain asks. I also just think that would be neat.

Cowboy AU - i put this one last cause its got drawings to it actually. Theyll be at the bottom

Basically just. Hey you ever watched a western. I think they look neat

This is another one me n ben have come up with lol

The soy sauce and all that shit still exist, im not sure where korrok fits in yet but ill figure it out

Theres no real like solid narrative yet ? but heres the barebones of everybody’s arcs.

John

Johns an absolute troublemaker, Of Course. Hes wanted in several towns for absolutely stupid shit. Hes a loner who shows up, causes chaos, gets drunk, does some drugs, runs away if people get too mad at him

He definitely had the same kind of deal with the soy sauce as in canon— he was at some kind of party, somebody offered it, he took it cause why the fuck wouldnt he, now he can see monsters and shit

Hes kind of a mooch also. Like. dont let him stay in your barn man he’ll never fucking leave and drink all your booze.

He runs into Dave when they happen to just, cross paths in the same town. the bullshit John stirs up ends up involving Dave in a way that makes it seem like it's his fault too, and they both get run out of town

after that he just tags along after Dave. hes decided this guy's Cool he wants to stick around. Dave is pissed at first, but not enough to shoot him or anything, and eventually, John grows on him

Dave

Dave also is a loner but unlike John hes simply so fucking awkward and bad with people. He doesnt feel like he belongs anywhere so he just travels

He’s the stereotypical Lone Ranger tbh. He wanders from town to town, solving their problems, though hed deny its out of any moral obligation (it kinda is, a little bit, tbh. He does like feeling useful). He shows up, fixes things, leaves. He's kind of a legend but most people think he's hiding something dark. other people jsut know him as that guy who farted real loud in the middle of the saloon and promptly skipped town out of sheer embarrassment. you know how it goes with Dave

He ends up involved with the Soy Sauce when a snake (not Actually a snake,) bites him. The snake’s more like the wig-monsters, really. Anyway, it injects him with the soy sauce, he fucking trips balls in the middle of the desert, he can see monsters now

He runs into John and shit goes tits-up, as said, but they become traveling buddies after that. he'd never say so, but he's glad for the company, actually. it's nice. hes not used to companionship but he feels a strange kind of easiness hanging out with John....

not sure how the Monster Dave concept will like fit in to this reality but like. trust me i want it in here. I'll Figure It Out.

Amy

Amy’s been living in a town John and Dave end up passing through and she is very curious about these two new Handsome Strangers who claim to fight monsters and just kinda. Persistently tags along til they let her join for real

Her family’s all dead, unfortunately, just like in canon, and she’s been living alone for a few years before meeting John n Dave. she had nothing left in that town to stay for, she'd been fantasizing about escaping on wild adventures for a long time and this felt a little like a dream come true. (Dave still gives her a spiel about how Difficult it is, but really, her fantasies were pretty grounded-in-reality already. i jsut think thats how she is, yknow?)

Shes the first person to react to the whole “we see monsters” shit with a kind of “oh, okay. neat” kind of response lmao

John and Dave fix whatever the fuck is up with her town (maybe that’s where the Korrok shit can fit, who knows) and Amy ends up being integral to that. After, she insists they take her with them because “they need her now” and Dave just cant really say no. John too is very much "the more the merrier!" and hes actually glad to have another person along he loves people lmao

At the start she has long hair but after she joins them she chops it short with a knife for convenience

also she still is an amputee. justt. idk. it was a wagon/stagecoach accident rather than a car accident lmao. just to clarify since i hadnt mentioned it, i wouldnt rob her of her ghost hand or yknow. all of the significance to her character that Missing A Hand has. although also now im going to have to research what was used as painkillers way-back-when, but im betting shes still got, like, her pain pills, they probably had those, maybe i wouldnt have to try too hard there. old timey medicine could be WACK though,

Shitload

Yeah hes in tthis shit mostly cause i liked designing his cowboy self lmao

Hes a kid (like 16, 17, technically i think in those days that was more Young Man than Kid but whatever. Hes Young i mean.) who got possessed by the Worms out in the desert and, by his family’s perception, just went missing!

Hes also a wanderer, but he ended up at the same town john and dave met in, at that same time, and starts following them after, already aware of who/what they are.

He keeps his face covered 24/7. actually he covers a Majority of his self for reasons. kinda want him to be a slightly more horrifying Worm Entity rather than human idk,

I kinda dont have much for this boy yet sorry Shitload

images !

with some editing notes for me cause im doing a very specific aesthetic with this lmao. i might change some lil details/colours though ...... idk

im also kinda 🤔 about shitload's colour palette. i want things assoicated w the sauce to be black'n'red predominantly but i think his palette might mirror dave's too closely. also im working on a korrok design i jsut am too busy to draw it now

[greenjudy]

Inquisitor Ask Meme

Reposting this for fun.

Anyone else want to take a crack? What kind of Inky would you be?

@allsortsoflicorice? @tyramir ? Bueller?

1. Race:

Human.

2. Class/Specialization:

Rift mage.

3. Your homeland?

The Free Marches. Wycome, to be precise. 

4. Your family?

Keep my family out of this; they have things to do besides die.

5. Who were you before?

A Circle Mage of some skill and much fear. Given my personality, the Circle would probably not cater to my strengths. It would make me more nervous and paranoid than I already am. The Inquisition would force me out of my comfort zone and give me some resilience I would never otherwise develop. Left to my own devices, I’d fall prey to obsession, and possibly possession by a Pride demon.  

6. Would you be religious?

I’ve read a lot of books by Brother Genitivi and Philliam! A Bard; I’m actually using my clout as Inquisitor to gather whatever is known about the Black City. You might say I’m an originist, I want to know where we came from; Andraste is kind of late on the scene for my interests. 

Post-Trespasser, this quest will more or less eat my brain.

Short answer: obsessed with “religious” subject matter, not religious per se. 

7. Do you have a mabari?

Nope. But I spoil Cullen’s baby. 

8. Your opinion on other races?

Raised to “not be racist” (as far as that goes) in cosmopolitan, edgy, free-wheeling Wycome; family with a ton of Dwarven trading connections. Angry about the elves. Knew loads of elven enchanters in the Circle, but I have awkward awareness of human privilege around the Dalish. 

Fascinated by the Shaperate. Wish all Thedas had those. Can you imagine? 

Worried about the Qun, but deeply impressed with the handful of Qunari I’ve met in person. Not mindless drones at all. Disciplined. Community first has some virtues, must say. 

9. What would Varric’s nickname for you be?

Baffler.

10. What would your tarot card look like?

The High Priestess: an older, abbess-looking chick standing at a scriptorium, surrounded by magical paraphrenalia and a gorgeous view out my high window. Raven (with message) standing on the windowsill.

11. Where would you hang out in Skyhold?

My bespoke mage tower, if I’m not in the Undercroft picking Dagna’s brain. Do a little weeding in the herb garden from time to time; we’re growing some fascinating things in there. 

After Solas leaves, I’d go spend time in the destroyed holding cells, watching the water fall.  

12. What would you do for fun?

Study. Knit. Paint. Visit my horses; the smell of horses is very comforting. 

I’d have highly technical arguments with Dorian and spend a lot, a lot, a lot of time talking to Solas.

13. What armor would you wear?

Cutting-edge tactical enchanted fabric. Light, layered, tweedy, enchanted.

I’d probably get sucked into magical materials research, specifically, making improvements to armor base-layers. I’m obsessed with armor. I have a whole research group (headed by Dagna, Cullen consulting) devoted to armor improvement.

14. What would your room look like?

Given the state of my current room, a chaotic mess of books, papers, research tools, letters from colleagues, blueprints, schematics, dirty dishes, orchids, and automata (Josie and I would be doll-geeks together).

15. Who would be your friends at Skyhold?

I try to make sure that the Inner Circle understands how much I appreciate them as a general rule. 

As for friends: 

Cassandra is one of the great ones. Just about the best person I know. Never met anyone so ready to acknowledge her mistakes. I’d trust her to be the next Divine. 

Dorian is a dear. One of the best sounding-boards. Somebody peel that man a grape. 

Cullen and Josephine are terrific advisors, couldn’t ask for better, their own problems of course, we’re all doing our best. I’d like to know Cullen better—suspect we have things, Circle things, to talk about. In another life, maybe. 

I’d get on with Varric—everyone gets on with Varric, come on—but I find him ultimately very armored, hard to know. Hid his best friend, didn’t he? Never talks about the lady he loves. 

Sera is actually easy to understand. Raw genius with a bow, one of the best to have along, out in the field. Not exactly my friend. So down on the Dalish. It’s her business, though. She and Dagna are adorable together. She makes Dagna happy, that’s good enough for me. 

I have a bit of a GP for the Iron Bull. (He had me at “front-line bodyguard.”) Never acted on it, though.

Solas is my… see… well, see below. 

16. Would you have any friends outside of the Inquisition?

I’d have the Thedas version of LinkedIn comrades in Antiva, Nevarra, and Orlais—researchers all. Plus one brilliant friend who’s a materials mage based out of Denerim, working with Sandal on woven metal enchantments; call her my “knitting buddy.”

17. Who wouldn’t you get along with?

Leliana would trouble me. Don’t like having someone this emotional and vindictive managing our intel networks. It’s bad juju, Ambassador; can’t trust her judgment, can you? And that feels like a loose end. Put us in a tight spot someday. Couldn’t we ask Varric…? No, I quite see that. Still. 

I’d understand Vivienne, and try to maintain a cordial relationship because I think most of her head is in the right place, even though she is entirely too power-oriented for a real friendship. 

Blackwall’s “find Darkspawn, kill them, repeat” approach would bother me. When I found out the truth about him, it would confirm my feeling that you need to lie to yourself, a lot, to just have enemies and kill them without compunction. I would also find myself highly influenced by Solas’s take on the Wardens. 

18. Who would you romance?

I’m a Circle mage who’s watched close friends be tormented by romantic love. Demonic possession and Tranquility. Babies taken away. This is not the kind of conditioning that disappears just because you take me out of a Circle. In my youth I worked it out by restricting myself to impossible love objects—there was this one Templar, very stern, very disciplined…he’d barely speak to me… Well. That was many years ago. 

That said, the best impossible love object I’ve ever encountered in my life is Solas. 

What does it matter, really? Bonds of friendship, don’t you know; romantic love leads to envy demons. I’m old now, at any rate. Inquisigeezer not exactly a romanceable character. 

19. Would you do pranks with Sera?

Probably not. Too busy. Too tired. Feel too much sympathy for her innocent victims. 

But I would do operations with Sera, with pleasure. 

20. Would you sleep with the Iron Bull (casually if not romance)?

My front-line bodyguard? Get on with you. It would get too complicated—for me, I mean, not him. 

21. Would you keep Cole around?

Yes. And I’d agonize about what would be the best path for him to take, and probably make him a spirit.

22. Can you play the game (politics)?

Yes. I’m better at it the more distant it is. If you’re talking about what to say at a party, I’ve developed a persona for that sort of thing. Stakes are high. Can’t be fooling around. A mage, remember? This guard drops, I get possessed; lose my temper, might incinerate you, can’t have that. 

23. What would be on your tombstone in the fade (What are you afraid of)?

“The world fell apart on my watch.”

24. Who would you recruit to seal the breach?

Mages. I understand mages. Their leadership’s been simply awful. Not sure what Fiona did with her spine. Without decent leadership, it’s mages running amok, trying to protect themselves, doing awful things out of fear; can’t have that, they’ll pull their own house down. Get them out of the weeds, stick ‘em in the Inquisition, give them a chance to show what they can do for the right cause. 

25. Opinion on Mages versus Templars?

It’s all about training, though, isn’t it? Templars and mages both need much, much better training. Without training, without a penetrating education with a solid grasp of magical theory, history, ethics—co-train the mages and templars, make ‘em take core courses together. Make them work together in strike teams; I’ve been doing that since we recruited ‘em, they actually partner well, as long as you’re not, you know, mad.

I would become obsessed (do you see the recurrence of this word) with the idea that mages could be Seeker-trained to resist possession and mind control, obviating the need for Tranquility. These disciplined (another key word) and trustworthy mages could be placed in a position of joint authority with properly educated Templars to create a College of Magi with research cells all over Thedas…

Yeah. We’ll see how that works out.

26. Who would be put in charge of Orlais and why?

Celine and Briala. Celine is the one with the right temperament, and for some reason I viscerally understand Briala. I’m all about reparations and integrating elven populations and something something protect the Dalish (can’t we actually give them the Dirth?).

27. Would you sacrifice the Chargers?

I couldn’t.

28. Would you go after Blackwall?

Oh, yes. And I’d keep him on, as Thom Rainier. 

29. Would you drink from the well?

Knowing me? Not knowing the implications except for those vague warnings? Yes, I would, and it would affect me for the rest of my life. 

I’d spend what’s left of myself using whatever insight and connections the Well gave me to work on Solas. 

30. Where would you go if the Inquisition was disbanded?

Under ordinary circumstances, the College. Daresay they’d want me to do something draining and administrative because of my being the (ex)Inquisitor; I’d look for a research niche but probably not get to keep it. 

Solas is not ordinary circumstances. I’d dedicate the rest of my life to that problem. 

31. How do you react to the egg telling you he is an elven god? 

I’d naively and arrogantly imagine that I could—if we could just get enough time to sit down together—he must understand what he’s likely to bring about, he needs people to talk to, dammit—

He would be the death of me, I’m afraid.

[carewyncromwell]

Okay I'm here to say, that post about Hogwarts history completely blew my mind. Can we have more Proffesor!Lane? :')

[Asking the Magical Historian to talk more about history?? Why yes, this pleases Lane very much.

Her lips spread into a crooked smile so like Jacob’s, even though her voice never reaches the levels of energy and volume that her son’s can when he’s geeking out about something.]

“(laughing softly) You’re a sweet ‘un. I’d be happy to...’give another lecture,’ so to speak.”

It’s a lot easier to give lectures through this ‘Askbox’ than presenting things in front of people. It reminds me of my one-on-one lessons with Winnie, before she went to Hogwarts.

“I know...why don’t I tell you a bit about house elf history? I wrote a whole essay presenting the research I collected for the Department for the Regulation and Control of Magical Creatures a few years back. That’s actually how I first got in touch with Bathilda, she sent me a letter after reading my essay...”

“Now first things first -- primary sources about elf culture are very hard to come by, as elf tradition and history has generally passed down through oral tradition. So most of the research I’ve collected is from second-hand accounts from house elves who were kind enough to lend me their insight and stories -- though I was also lucky enough to track down the journal of a wizard named Ralston Potter, who recorded the events surrounding him freeing his own family’s house elf, Frell.

“House elves are not human, and just like centaurs and goblins, they have their own kind of powerful magic and their own distinct way of seeing the world that differs greatly from our own. Most notably, elves do not use wands to channel their magic the way wizards do. There are...legal reasons for that today, of course, but there’s also history behind it. You might have noticed that underage witches and wizards can cast very powerful magic before receiving a wand. That’s because without a wand, their magic is very volatile. Magic is like fire -- if it’s not controlled, it can cause a lot of damage. And so wands are used to give our magic focus: it’s like a steering wheel that allows us to maneuver our magic wherever we want it to go. If one never receives a wand, or even uses magic without a wand too long, it can be very dangerous, not just for the people around that person, but for that person themselves. It can damage their health and body, and in extreme cases, they could even become an Obscurus.

“For elves, however, they’ve found another way to focus their magic -- not through a wand, but through permanent institutions. In the early days, elves were able to hone their extreme magical talent by focusing all of their abilities on the maintenance of a house or place of business. Their loyalty was not to the family that lived there, but to the place they cared for -- therefore, if the family was ever disrespectful to the elf or its home, the elf could take proper justice on that family. But if the family was kind to the elf, the elf would often return that kindness.

“Unfortunately, with the advent of the Statute of Secrecy at the end of the 17th century, things became much more complicated. In the old days, it didn’t matter what sort of family owned the house an elf cared for -- Muggle or magical, the elf would go on just the same. But as soon as the Wizarding World had to hide all evidence of magic from Muggles, the issue of what to do about the elves living in whatever house they wished became a real problem. The new Ministry of Magic knew it couldn’t compete with elves from a magical perspective -- elves have always been more powerful than wizards, even though their traditions and culture keep that power focused on a singular, concrete purpose like caring for a house or a family, rather than their own advancement. But at the same time, the Ministry couldn’t afford to have the existence of elves exposed to Muggles...and admittedly, many elves had become frustrated by the more rampant lack of respect shown by Muggles who had moved into the homes they occupied. So a compromise was reached -- elves would refocus their magic, not on a house that could pass from person to person, but directly onto a magical family. The magical family could then both offer protection and stability for the elf, so long as they chose to stay with them. At that time, the elf could leave whenever they wanted. This is also around the time when the idea of setting elves free with clothes originates. Although we’re not entirely sure where it came from, one theory among magical historians is that it was symbolic of the house elf’s services no longer being needed. As an example, one can point to the old Muggle fairy tale ‘The Elves and the Shoemaker,’ which, although likely not a historical account, may have been based on something true. The elves’ focus would’ve been on the family owning the shoe shop -- once the family had mastered their trade enough that they could make the elves their own clothes to thank them, the elves realized they were no longer needed, and so left with no regrets.

“Sadly, restricting elves to live only with magical families ultimately gave the elves much less choice about where they could live and what places they could use to focus their magic. If they were set free or left, it proved very difficult for them to find another home. They couldn’t just take up residence wherever they wanted anymore, either -- if they decided to stay even if a family set them free, or if they occupied a space where they weren’t wanted, the Ministry nearly always sided with the witches or wizards in question, since those magical families were now the only ones who could claim any ownership to the house. And as many magical families started to break away from the ideas of blood purity and marry Muggles and Muggle-borns, it became less popular to rely on house elf labor. So now today, elves are placed in a rather unpleasant position. They need a stable environment so as to focus their magic and not only maintain their culture but also their own livelihood...but due to lack of choice, elves have lost a lot of the equal footing they’d had with wizards in centuries past. This has therefore led many magical families to treat elves like servants or even slaves, rather than equals. But simply freeing an elf, or even all of them, wouldn’t solve the inherent problem, for they would still need something permanent that they could use to channel their powerful magic safely. Otherwise the elf’s own life and safety, as well as everyone around them, is put at risk.

“Now the idea of elves owning wands is...a thorny issue. Regardless of my own...personal views about the law forbidding house elves from owning a wand...many elves don’t want to use wands. They see it as a wizard invention exclusively. If they were to use a wand rather than focus magic on institutions or families the way their ancestors have, it would be sacrificing a piece of their culture -- and goodness knows, they’ve already been very detached from their heritage already thanks to wizard interference. But the law itself forbidding elf wand use was completely funded and propagated by wizards who felt deeply threatened by the thought of elves being treated as equals. They enjoyed having elves under their foot, and they had no interest treating them like creatures worthy of respect and an equal say in the Wizarding World and how it’s run. This is not an opinion or conjecture on my part....every single witch and wizard who supported that law -- Cantankerous Nott, Wilhelm Rosier, Josephina Flint, Odo Crouch, Aspen Greengrass -- expressed the belief that elves, if they were given wands, would be too powerful to control and that their subjugation was not only just, but also for the protection of wizardkind. They, to put it very simply, were so afraid of elves being extended the same privileges as wizards that they enshrined their second-class status into wizarding law.”

[Lane brings her hands together, interlacing the fingers solemnly.]

“Now I know a lot of this...isn’t particularly uplifting. Elves’ current position in magical society -- much like that of centaurs and goblins or even beings like werewolves, vampires and hags -- is not very ideal. But there have been some efforts to fight for elf rights, over the years. St. Mungo’s Hospital for Maladies and Injuries has been employing and housing elves for almost two decades now. There are now about a hundred wizard-owned restaurants around the world that are either completely or largely operated by elves. Helga Hufflepuff first brought house elves to Hogwarts back before the Statute of Secrecy was enacted, but when Albus Dumbledore became Headmaster, he introduced some improvements, such as adding a small, dormitory-like space next to the kitchens where the elves could sleep and keep personal belongings. And as our understanding of elf culture improves, so too can our laws and policies regarding them.”

((OOC: HEADCANONS GALORE AGAIN. For anyone who has read my fic Harry Potter and the Lack of Lamb Sauce, this is pretty much the essence of that one abbreviated history lesson Millicent Bulstrode gave Hermione in that one chapter where they discuss elf rights. XDD This also took WAY too long to write out...whew! Seriously, though, Candy love, I’m glad you enjoyed my absolute nerdiness!! *tackle-hug* <333

I’m well aware of the...problematic elements of the house elves’ depiction in the original Potter novels, and although yes, I agree the parallels one can draw are troubling, I also have to point to how goblin and centaur culture are depicted in the Potterverse being distinctly “not-human” (i.e. goblins’ conception of “ownership” being more focused on the creator of the object rather than anyone who inherits it, or in HPHM centaurs requiring offerings in order to have a chance to earn entry into their camp). It’s not out of the realm of possibility, therefore, that elves likewise have their own distinctly “not-human” traditions and culture. And admittedly the idea of Rowling’s house elves seems very inspired by folk tales surrounding the brownie/boggart, as well. But yeah, if you don’t dig this interpretation of mine, I totally get it -- I’m not going to act like I’m any sort of authority here. I’m just a huge nerd with way too much time on her hands who prefers to find ways to make this fictional world she enjoys better rather than double-down on the things she doesn’t like. XD;

In regards to elves using a permanent institution to focus their magic on...my personal headcanon is that Dobby, as a free elf, used Hogwarts and -- once he’d reunited with him -- Harry as that permanent institution. Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to go cry in a corner.))

Ask Lane Cromwell!

[zetalial]

Maria Ross (FMA 2003)

Hey, there’s nothing I love more than being requested to talk about FMA. This post is for @thornstone8773, who believes that Maria Ross needs some more love from the fandom. I agree.

Maria Ross is lovely. She’s introduced in Episode 18, which is while Ed’s studying Marcoh’s notes and she immediately gets into conflict with him. She sees Ed’s complete lack of concern for his own safety to be an issue when she’s been tasked with protecting him. 

But it’s not just her job that compels her to care for the Elric brothers. She sees them as lost children getting in over their heads and needing someone to look after them. And she’s fully prepared to step into the role herself - whether Ed likes it or not.

Throughout this episode, she and Ed conflict with each other, Ross gets irritated at his impulsiveness and gets angry when he insists on working in the library where she isn’t able to provide him proper protection. Ed refuses to listen to her and he’s not obliged to (due to his rank as State Alchemist). He’s been dismissing her and Denny Broche repeatedly and very much sees bodyguards as another hindrance to his goals - another thing forced on him. (Ed sees the Military as a necessary evil.)

 So, Maria talks to Hughes about it instead. And nice as Hughes might be towards Ed, consistently helping him where others wouldn’t, Hughes takes Ross’s side in their argument. 

Hughes is often bending the rules for Ed and Al, he told them about how Scar killed Nina, offered him case files when Ed was investigating Barry, and helped him fight the terrorists on the train. Ed was fully expecting Hughes to be on his side. And Hughes knows it too - he doesn’t like denying them. But he cares about their safety too and recognises that Maria Ross cares.

Ross inquires about why Hughes would let them chase after the Philosopher’s stone at all and Hughes offers some nice insight. Ed and Al would chase after it regardless of whether he let them or not. By helping them, he is able to better protect them and, uniquely among the military, has Ed and Al’s trust. (Because Ed certainly doesn’t trust Mustang at this point in the series.) 

Additionally, Hughes says that the State’s future is in their hands. That he and Ross have a duty to enable them to research into the Philosopher’s stone. Clearly, Hughes recognises the importance of their quest and is already looking into the bigger picture. Looking into it further is dangerous, as Hughes will soon learn though. Ross doesn’t like this but accepts it. From here, she’s more actively supporting their endeavours.

In the next episode, the Truth behind Truths, Ed has found out the secret of the Philosopher’s stone and wants to just give up. It’s practically what Ross was aiming for an episode ago but now she actively encourages him to continue searching, citing the importance of it, how it goes beyond their own personal goals.  

Like, Ed wanted to make a stone to save his brother but after learning the cost, he realises he can’t go through with this any more. But he’s also finding out a lot about the military’s corruption and how the stone has been used in Ishval. There is more to look into, namely Lab 5 and what lies at the heart of this conspiracy. Ross encourages Ed to continue looking even if they themselves won’t gain anything from it because there is more to learn. He can’t let himself be turned away because he doesn’t like the answers he’s getting. Ross recognises he’s scared and still essentially a child, but encourages him anyway. It’s a great scene.

When Ed finds his determination once more, Ross gives this smile, like she’s proud of them.

‘Course Ed and Al still don’t trust her fully yet, though he did share his conclusions concerning Lab 5 with her. Ross promised to use the military to look into it but Ed and Al decide to sneak out. 

I try not to bring up BH too much in comparison so... sorry. But the two different responses from their respective Maria Ross’s highlight their differences. When BH Broche and Ross discover the boys have snuck out, they’re comically worried and don’t want anyone to find out they lost track of the boys as it might get them into trouble. They’re concerned about the Elrics too, yes, but also themselves. 

Maria Ross in 03, meanwhile, looks betrayed to find they’ve snuck out and informs Hughes. He agrees to authorise a military sweep of the abandoned Laboratory, getting a bunch of other soldiers, including Armstrong involved even though it’s the middle of the night. Fuhrer Bradley actually runs into them and goes along with it (likely realising it would be too suspicious to deny their operation.) 

Upon entering Lab 5, Ross finds Ed in the red room and bravely wades into the room to calm him down. He had absorbed incomplete stone material and was in great danger of some sort of alchemic backlash as he was unable to control all that energy. Even Armstrong seemed to think it was too dangerous to go near him. Maria Ross calms him with a motherly hug, likely the first Ed had received in a long time. 

In the aftermath of Lab 5, Ross confronts Ed, slapping him when he tries to brush the whole incident off. She asks him to try and start trusting adults more and he agrees, apologising for some of his reckless behaviour. It’s a good start to an episode about opening up emotionally. 

Ed and Al leave for Dublith so Ross doesn’t show up much more for a while. In Episode 38, she spots Winry and Sheska eavesdropping in Central and helps them out against Sloth, where they reveal some of what they’re learning to them. Ross is quite observant to have noticed Winry there and this nicely leads into Ross’s next significant appearance.

When she hears Ed and Al are on the run from the military, she and Broche decide to have an abrupt ‘vacation’ in Risembool. She tells Winry and Sheska how Ed and Al are wanted by the military and how she doesn’t believe it. Here we see Ross actively going against the military she’s a part of. 

And then again, when she hears news that Ed and Al have been arrested by the military, she goes to break them out. That’s direct action against the military. It’s really the Tringham brothers she ends up saving but they run into Ed and Izumi again anyway and Maria ends up actively fighting against Archer, who pretty much represents some of the worst of the Military while she’s basically become a rebel.

The epilogue shows her working in the new Government now that the Military state has been overthrown. She seems fairly busy so there’s a lot being done. She’s clearly doing the best for the State’s future.

So, all in all, Maria Ross is a character who has the Elric brother’s best interests at heart. She’s a part of the military but she’s nice and goes beyond her duty for them. She represents the best parts of it - the good people working within it who care and want to protect others. Unlike everyone else, she still sees the Elrics as children and tries to encourage Edward to trust her. 

She is very principled and when she disagrees with something she will not stand for it. She does not let Edward get away with whatever he wants, she’s ready to question Hughes and she’s ready to question the Military too. Ultimately, her intentions are good and it’s a greatly encouraging sign to see her and Broche and Sheska working in the reformed State.   

[almostarchaeology]

Hogwarts Needs Archaeologists, Part 2: Excavating Magic

By Adrián Maldonado

In the last blog post, I realized that despite being suffused with ancient artefacts, the wizarding world of Harry Potter didn’t seem to have any archaeologists. Instead, wizards and witches live in a weirdly eternal present with little sense of how things have come to be as they are, and this ultimately caused them no end of trouble. So much of the story hinges on prominent characters not knowing about artefacts and landscapes of medieval origin that it seemed clear that the establishment of a Wizarding Museum or department of Magical Material Culture Studies at Hogwarts may have genuinely saved them from war.

Harry Potter Studio Tour: closest we’ll get to a wizarding museum (source)

Even though wizards can’t be arsed learning about their own past, it behooves us muggle archaeologists to interrogate this invisible but fundamental aspect of our shared human past. As the books make clear, muggles and wizards are all just human. The separation between the two has its roots in the same intellectual fallacy of early modern thought which gave muggles the concept of race – that human ability could be measured in purity of ‘blood’. Beyond a focus on antiquities, attention to the archaeological context of the wizarding world is essential to the project of interrogating the human condition, and will produce new insights on the muggle past and present. To learn more, we will have to conduct some fieldwork of our own.

When is magic?

Before we start planning the Godric’s Hollow Big Dig, we need to know how archaeology might work in the wizarding world. Looking back at these stories with nerd-tinted spectacles, it seems to me that magic changes over time, and the ways it is deployed may tell us something about the human journey, magically-abled or otherwise.

No - obviously no we don’t

We know there are one or two people who care about history and magical theory, because in Philosopher’s Stone we get a list of textbooks assigned to first-years at Hogwarts which includes A History of Magic by Bathilda Bagshot and Magical Theory by Adalbert Waffling. However, we get precious few glimpses into these texts as Harry does not seem to read. We also know these are used in some of the most boring and tedious courses taught at Hogwarts, ensuring few wizards would want to go on to study them further. Occupy the curriculum!

As we explored in the previous post, it seems that history in the wizarding world seems to begin only around a thousand years ago, when Hogwarts was founded. Much of what passes for history is the merely the genealogy of famous houses. It is curiously similar to Europe in the early nineteenth century, when there was an awareness of classical antiquity, but no such concept as prehistory. Perhaps it is a world that somehow has not yet discovered archaeology?

Archaeology > time travel (source)

Perhaps, one might argue, there is no need for wizarding archaeologists because wizards have time-turners which allow time travel. However, it so happens that time travel beyond a few hours in the past is extremely dangerous and heavily regulated, and in any case all of the remaining time-turners in the Department of Mysteries were destroyed in the Second Wizarding War.

That notwithstanding, one might also argue that wizards don’t need archaeology because anyone could stand in a field and cast spells like Accio coin hoard, or Revelio Roman villa and be done with it. But as with metal detecting, simply ripping an object out the ground does not help you understand why it got there, and if done poorly it may even impede the possibility of reconstructing its context later. Similarly, chasing the walls of a Roman villa would destroy the evidence of just how it was reduced to its foundations and what happened in this spot for the next two millennia. This would not be archaeology, but antiquarianism. And we don’t even seem to have that.

That said, it would be great to magically de-turf, sieve and cart away spoil. We could sure use the help backfilling, too.

But what about excavating magical sites? Can magic be excavated? Do we even know when magic began? Could archaeologists help find out?

Awareness of enchantments

Dunno Harry - it’s either paleolithic or a horcrux (source)

A lot of our knowledge of how magic works in the Potterverse comes from the fleeting glimpses we get of masters like Dumbledore at work. In the iconic 26th chapter of Half-Blood Prince, The Cave, we watch the headmaster undertake some hardcore field survey.

“Magic always leaves traces”, he explains as he detects the curses and spells that Tom Riddle placed to secure the hiding place of one of his horcruxes.

Harry could not tell whether the shivers he was experiencing were due to his spine-deep coldness or to the same awareness of enchantments. Dumbledore approached the wall of the cave and caressed it with his blackened fingertips, murmuring words in a strange tongue that Harry did not understand. Twice Dumbledore walked right around the cave, touching as much of the rough rock as he could, occasionally pausing, running his fingers backwards and forwards over a particular spot…

Dark magic, at least, seems to be detectable, at least to those, like Dumbledore and Harry, lucky enough to have been born in Godric’s Hollow, where all of British wizarding history starts and ends. Throughout the books, we hear occasional stories of places or objects having ‘old magic’, which also gives off some sort of distinctive trace. Indeed, there seems to be nothing worse than old Dark magic, which leaves more than just a trace. This is most aptly described in the Pottermore essay on Azkaban, which was only discovered after its occupier, the dark sorcerer Ekrizdis, died and its concealment charms faded away. “Experts who had studied buildings built with and around Dark magic contended that Azkaban might wreak its own revenge upon anybody attempting to destroy it.” Wait, there are experts in magical architectural history but not archaeology? That figures, actually – in its origins, medieval archaeology was itself mainly about unearthing the ground plans of castles and cathedrals.

As many of our archaeological textbooks tell us, excavation is managed destruction. So would it ever be possible to excavate a site of old Dark magic, or would this count as an attempt to ‘destroy’ it? And how would one know until one tried to dig there? Speaking as a former archaeology health and safety officer, I can’t help but think of the threat old Dark magic might pose to any novice archaeowizard who works on such sites. Real-world archaeologists need to make sure they are up to date on all their vaccinations, but I’m not sure what can be done to prevent accidental cursing by taking a mattock to the wrong enchanted soil layer.

Revelio stratigraphy

Dumbledore’s methodology and Harry’s ‘awareness of enchantments’ lead me to believe that such threats can be averted, or at least mitigated, by undertaking preventative magophysical survey. The question is whether the traces of spells that Dumbledore and Harry can sense have a physical signature that can be isolated and detected mechanically – or perhaps, by wand. Wandmaker Ollivander’s notes on wand woods shows that some woods may be more receptive to the natural world than others; for instance, “Hazel wands also have the unique ability to detect water underground, and will emit silvery, tear-shaped puffs of smoke if passing over concealed springs and wells.” In this instance at least, it seems that wands can have involuntary, mechanical responses to certain external stimuli. Other woods and wand cores are also said to have the ability to learn and detect magical character. In short, this is an area that needs a lot more research, but would still be restricted to the wizarding population, which, as we have already seen, could barely give a toss about their own heritage.

People and things in the Potterverse

Old magic can be the most powerful (source)

Speaking of wands, these ‘objects’ open up some pretty fundamental questions about the nature of things and people in the Potterverse. This was all explored in some depth in my scriptural commentary of choice, Binge Mode Harry Potter episode 55, wherein Jason Concepcion devoted a Restricted Section to wands. From the beginning of the series, we are told that wands are semi-animate objects with agency of their own. Wands famously ‘choose’ their owners, but it does not end there; in his notes on wand woods, Ollivander observes that hazel wands die with their owners, and that 

Hornbeam wands likewise absorb their owner’s code of honour, whatever that might be, and will refuse to perform acts – whether for good or ill – that do not tally with their master’s principles. A particularly fine-tuned and sentient wand.” [Emphasis mine] 

Most interestingly, wands seem to become a part of their owner’s essence; as wandmaker Ollivander explains, “each wand is the composite of its wood, its core and the experience and nature of its owner”. What he is describing here is a rudimentary sort of assemblage theory.

Assembling the wizard (source)

It seems wands are only ‘objects’ until they choose an owner, at which point they become part-person. And as we saw in a previous post, wands and pensieves are often buried with their owners, as if they are indivisibly entwined with the wizard, even after death. In a similar but more sinister way, Voldemort is able to ensoul objects, and these Horcruxes take on shades of his person which enact his will on anyone who encounters them. The wizarding world is full of objects that are part-people, or is it people that are part object?

This should come as no surprise to anthropologists. For decades theorists have explored all the different ways in which we are entangled with the people, things, environments and social structures in which we are embedded. We look to other continents and distant pasts to seek parallels when they are all around us. For instance, ancient Egyptians had a complicated idea of what constituted the person, from the physical body to several aspects of what we patronisingly call ‘the soul’, mainly because we cannot translate its complexity into any other Judeo-Christian terminology. These include the name, the heart and the shadow, and it is striking how many of these aspects of the person could be made to reside into what we would call inanimate objects.

The Enlightenment notion of the individual with unlimited agency, existing only within the bounds of their own bodies and minds, is very much out of fashion, as I have accidentally already explored in previous posts on this blog. We have trouble dissociating people from their belongings after they die, as if they remain uncannily inhabited. We send our names to space by the thousands, because it matters that this aspect of our selves is preserved in some way. Wizards are merely cyborgs, but then, aren’t we all?

Excavating the self

His teaching style was unorthodox to say the least (Warner Bros. Pictures)

The problem here is that the Harry Potter cycle is, on the face of it, distinctly repulsed by the idea of a soul being split up and distributed among objects and people. But this critique always kind of rang false for me. Voldemort is guilty of lots of things (murder, bigotry, aversion to rhinoplasty), but not the inhabitation of objects. The story is full of ways in which people are permeable beyond horcruxes; wands, pensieves, names, portraits, ghosts, Tom Riddle’s diary and the Sorting Hat, which contains the ‘intelligence’ of the Hogwarts founders, all ‘store’ an essence of the person. As we saw in the previous post, the Hogwarts founders are represented by objects which act as relics. At one point, Hermione even becomes multiple selves in her third year with a time-turner. More mystical happenings involve the permeation of one’s self into another: Lily Potter’s love shields Harry; Snape’s Patronus becomes Lily’s doe; Harry’s Patronus is his father’s. Through the wands, the self is extended. In the pensieve, memory becomes material, reminding us that thoughts, emotions and perhaps even magic, are of the body. “Of course it is happening inside your head, Harry, but why on earth should that mean it is not real?”

Without digging a single trench or featuring a single archaeologist, Rowling’s universe predicted a lot that would become fashionable in archaeological theory in the 21st century. Perhaps the most important lesson imparted by the books is that the difference between muggles and wizards is simply awareness. It is not only muggles who are unaware of the magic world under our feet (and apparently latent in our blood). Wizards are also unaware of where and when their powers reside. And if wizards could be convinced to take a material turn, what might muggles achieve by exploring their own entanglement with the wizarding world? Might we excavate an awareness of the enchantment within us all?

***

Back to Part 1: Fantastic Antiquities and Where to Find Them

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[rain-a-dragomir]

🎀: Gift Given

@devrimsperch

“What a way to make a first impression. Do you introduce yourself like this to all your vanguardians?” Devrim teased, a playful tone to his upturned lips. “Thank you- again. It’s nice to meet you, Adrian.”

Devrim strode over to his hotplate, setting it up to heat some water for the both of them. “What brings you to my humble abode? Shouldn’t you be off in Crucible celebrating Crimson Days?” he asked, curious. Sure he had Guardians flit through here day in and day out, but it wasn’t often they had made the move to actually make nice with him. Many of them babied him, were parented by him, or just wanted to get their patrol duties done and get back to wherever or whatever they had been doing before.

He wondered what kind of tea Adrian would like, as he snuck a glance at the other to give him a quick once over. Squinting, he came to a decision- Ah, spiced chai. Obviously.

A soft warm chuckle escaped his lips as he smiled brightly, both at the thought that the older Rifleman had indeed seemed rather pleased with the introduction and gift; and the jest of getting to know the other Van-guardians much like their current manner. Another soft chuckle left his lips as he thought about trying to get to know someone like Asher Mir, while the man was unarguably brilliant, he had the social skills of a Thrall. “I’m fairly sure the likes of Asher Mir is far too busy in his research. Osiris is more than likely breaking something within the infinite forest, plus he has his. . . followers.” He deftly glossed over the word ‘Followers’ having met with them a few times before, it was usually best to quickly finish what business you had with them, then hightail it out. They were fairly fanatical about the man they put upon a pedestal, but once in a while they tend to give some decent insight.

Besides, there weren’t too many other’s he’d bother introducing himself to, even among the Vanguard faction. Many of the Guardian leaders that held posts upon planetary bodies were all busy fighting their own battles to even worry about lone guardians. Sloan was trying to keep the floating structures of Titan from sinking into the methane abyss, Ana was dealing with Rasputin. Much like them, the other’s were dealing with varying issues on their own planets. “Crimson days at the Crucible? Just not as much fun as racing a sparrow through dubious tracks.” He mused, his Ice colored hues seemingly sparkled at the mention of racing sparrows through the wilds, dodging an array of always changing obstacles and danger.

“Plusssss he got into trouble!” Came the melodic, singing filled the air around them, it’s tones continually shifting much like a wind chime in the breeze. Shifting out of the transmat zone, Jade lazily spun through the air, it’s Jadeite shell catching flecks of sun through the window. “Commander Baldy  was super mad we were away, exploring for so long. Far far away! He can stay mad though, I got to see the Ocean!” The chiming notes changed as the little ghost giggled while spinning in place, leaving her Guardian with a look of amusement painting his face.

“We may have gone further than what the Vanguard trio allowed. Zavala is. . .Zavala and I don’t quite see eye to eye, so to speak. He seems off put by what I’ve been trying to do for a bit now. After talking with Ikora, he sort of overheard what Jadeite and I were trying to accomplish, then he sort of put us on leave.” The man gave a light shrug of his shoulders, head cocked to one direction as he nuzzled the ghost that floated into the crook of his neck. Every twirl of Jadeite's shell tinkled against the few piercings he had up the edge of his ear.

“We got grounded. Not allowed to take part in guardian duties for a whole week. No flying off to other planets, or halfway around the world.” The little ghosts melodic chimes had gone low, it’s verdant shell drooping slightly.

“But we’ll be able to catch Holiday’s race later, so there is that.” He crooned. The thought of watching a sparrow race seemed to have perked her up now that she was pin wheeling through the air. “So since I don’t have any prior engagements to worry about, might as well take it easy and get to know some of the people that have been a big help during missions. Are you going to participate in the Crimson Crucible? Bet you’d make a few great shots in there.”

[adorealeclightwood]

SH 3x08 Theory [Spoiler Alert!]

[If you don’t want to know anything about 3x08 or any of my theories yet, don’t read this. Click the back arrow. Read my book review. Ask me questions. Stop reading this though. If you just want to watch the promo clip, my theories will begin under the cut.] 

For those of you that don’t mind spoilers and speculations, welcome!

As usual, our beloved Shadowhunters aren’t taking their feet off our necks. We only get a couple of hours to breathe after an episode before they start hitting us with promos for the next one. 

Here’s the first promo clip (that I know of) for 3x08, titled “A Heart of Darkness”.

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Clearly, there’s a lot going down in 3A. (I’m not complaining.) 

First off, we have Miss Lilith showing her face instead of using Jace, or one of her many disciples. (For those of you interested in a head count, she had 32, then Ollie came so it was 33, but two disintegrated, so now she has 31, unless you count Jace, which would put her back at 32. The numbers are confusing.) 

Enough with the mental math - moving on. 

As you can tell from my “Girl WHAT?” post, I had a few questions. One of which was about Lilith, and whether or not she’d be coming for Simon. Judging by the promo, the answer to that is: of course she is, because everyone loves picking on the boy for shit he can’t control. 

Yes, I’m bitter.

On the bright side, it looks like we’ll finally get a little more insight as to what the mark actually means, and why the Seelie Queen chose Simon specifically. I’m also hoping we learn why he became a daylighter in the first place, but I’m willing to cross one bridge at a time. 

By now, we know that Seelies may not be able to lie, but they’re famous for finding all sorts of ways to bend the truth. Remember what darling mama Lightwood said to Izzy back in 1x06?

“Never trust people who can’t lie. They find much more inventive ways to stab you in the back.” 

If anyone has learned anything from the Seelie Queen in season two alone, it’s that Maryse told no lies. 

So what does any of this have to do with Lilith? I have a theory. 

It’s far-fetched, highly unlikely, and impossible to prove/disprove because the main person involved is dead. 

Remember when the Seelie Queen decided to align herself with Valentine and start a war? Anything to be on the winning team, right? Right. What if, during their little walk, Valentine got to talking, and got in the Seelie Queen’s head with his ideas of ridding the world of demon blooded creatures? 

I mean, it’s hard to be considered the losing team if your team is the only one left standing. 

Then Valentine goes and kills Jace, which makes Clary get all knife happy and take him out, so his plans die with him...or so we assumed. 

Hear me out. 

WHAT IF, the Seelie Queen did some...Seelie Research (I don’t know what else to call it. Digging maybe?) and discovered a mark. A mark unknown by any Shadowhunter, vampire, or warlock, that packed enough power to take out anyone - even someone as evil as the mother of all demons. All she’d need is a vampire with the ability to walk in the sun, and she’d be all set. 

(I told you it was far-fetched, but I’m drinking Jack D. again, and I needed to post this.)

Whenever one of Lilith’s children/disciples/minions/whatever the fuck you want to call them dies, we know that she can feel it. It’s why she left to retrieve the sliver of Clary’s soul herself; she’d just felt the death of the demon she’d sent out to find Clary, only to be killed when Izzy came across it. Again, just recently in 3x07, two of them approached Simon, and were disintegrated by the mark, which caused Lilith to scream, either in pain or frustration - we don’t know yet. 

Lilith knows about the mark, and exactly who gave it to Simon, so she goes straight to the Seelie Court to have the queen remove it. Naturally, that condescending little wench said something that translated to no, and Lilith didn’t like that one bit, and held her hand up as if she were ready to take the Seelie Queen out herself (thus disabling the mark and rendering it useless? Again, I don’t know. I’m tipsy.). 

While I don’t approve of killing people when they don’t give you what you want, I’m perfectly fine with her taking this issue up with the Seelie Queen and not Simon directly (at least in the promo), because that boy can barely button his shirt properly these days, and he never asked to be a part of any of this. (The mark, or the shadow world in general.)

Alright, so that’s my stuff about Lilith. 

Now for the heart wrenching shit.

Jace is whole mess. He’s out here struggling, but the only good thing about this clip is the fact that it’s the real Jace! That means that Catarina was right, and Magnus was able to think outside the box (like the boss he is) and figure out a way to help Jace, even if it’s only temporary. 

The down side? He’s holding a knife, and appears to be begging Izzy to kill him with it. 

“If I go with you, she’s gonna find me. She’s gonna make me do worse.”

This is another up/downside. The gaps in Jace’s memory have probably been filled in now that he isn’t under Lilith’s spell, but now it looks like he knows what he’s done, and he’s terrified of having to do it again. So much so, that he’d rather die than risk her finding him. 

THIS IS WHY I WAS HOLLERING JUST NOW. 

I refuse to believe things managed to get this fucked up over the course of one episode. Jace may have his faults, but he doesn’t deserve this, just like he didn’t deserve losing control of his mind and being forced to go around harming people. They went through all the trouble of catching up with him and saving him, only to get him back scared and suicidal? 

What kind of fucked up shit is that? 

I know, I know. Don’t start. 

jAcE iS hOrRiBlE.

hE’s A bAd PeRsOn.

He DiD _____ sO hE dEsErVeS tO bE mEnTaLlY aNd PhYsIcAlLy AbUsEd AnD sExUalLy HaRrAsSeD bY tHe DeMoN lAdY.

rEmEmBeR wHeN jAcE *inserts old shit that literally no one cares about anymore*

If there was ever a time to focus on what was happening and why as opposed to who it was happening to - this is it. If this were any other character (literally a n y other character) you guys would be rioting. Shitty things don’t suddenly become less shitty when they’re happening to Jace, alright? Alright. 

I don’t have a theory for what’s going to happen, and it scares me, because I don’t want anything (else) bad to happen. If Jace gets seriously injured or killed, not only is it going to fuck me up, but it’s going to fuck Alec up; it would literally destroy him. And Clary, to the point where she may never forgive herself, just like when Alec couldn’t forgive himself for what happened to Jocelyn. And Izzy, because I know for a fact that if she’s the one to stab Jace and end up killing him, it’ll wreck her. Hell, even Simon would feel some type of way. 

This would effect everyone. Including my sappy ass, so I’d like things to start working out for Jace quick, fast, and in a hurry, if that’s alright with all of you. 

On one hand, I can’t wait for more promos, but then again, part of me wants to shut my eyes and not see anything else until next week. 

That’s all. Thanks for coming to my tipsy Ted Talk ft. me, and five shots of Jack. 

[braindamageforbeginners]

Self-doubt

If there's one little takeaway from these dark little lullabies of mine, it's that having cancer is unimaginably isolating (especially if you're under 40 - while everyone else is establishing their career and starting families, my ambitions are significantly lower, and much, much harder to achieve). Case in point, I was at dinner with some family friends, and I mentioned my newly-modified diet to the waitress (lots of fruits and vegetables and protein)(again, if you're enjoying it, you need another helping of carrots). She wanted to know if I had any dangerous dietary restrictions or chemo interactions. She did it out of concern and compassion, but it's still a reminder that I'm now a member of The Others, no matter where I am. I guess I should be happy I have passing privileges, but I do kind of wonder how many of us just get so dejected and discouraged that we give up. Or get tired and screw up when organizing prescriptions and appointments.

Also, I was recently contacted by another friend whose father got a glioma. Like me, both of these friends have enough of a clinical background to know that are good and bad decisions, even with the relatively limited options for brain cancer. Both of them wanted to know if I had any insight onto how to deal with that new found sense of maddening self-doubt.

Because I’m me, I have no fool-proof way of dealing that, but I will offer the following advice: do whatever it takes to stop that from allowing you to make decisions, even bad ones. Again, I'm on some interesting psychiatric drugs these days, or, if a hip-flask is more your thing, go for it. We make all sorts of noise about pill-shaming, I've talked about it at length, you're not going to be useful-much less survive, if you're curled into the fetal position sobbing (I know that's unhelpful because that was my first approach). Same goes for family members or caretakers. And if you're not okay with Prozac, that's fine, too, just do whatever it takes to jolt yourself out of panic or numbness and back to somewhat effective decision-making, because you're you're now on the clock Second, to use the old Yiddish expression, "If your grandmother had balls, she'd be your grandfather," you'll drive yourself crazy with hypotheticals (I know I still do). That's also counterproductive, and you are going to need to be at your most productive and intelligent. To keep stealing from pop culture, I'm playing this like Matt Damon from The Martian - I've got a list of things that will kill me tomorrow, next week, next month, and next year, subdivided into things I can and can't solve. I'm not usually too bothered about things I can't solve because, if I've been careful, logical, and observant, it's going to take every bit of my energy and time just getting to next month. As previously-mentioned, it’s not a great way to live, but the operative word in that sentence is “live.”

I also realize that I have a bit of an advantage with the Warlocks invested in keeping me alive long enough to figure my disease out. Original Research Coordinator mentioned that they're always recruiting for trials for recurrences and metastasis (even though I'm sticking with the "dark wizard" origin story for Senior Warlock, it wouldn't surprise me to learn that he was a billionaire who was orphaned at a young age when brain cancer gunned down his parents in an alley in Gotham), in that I might get a few extra OODA Loop cycles than the average brain cancer patient, but the principles still stand - indecisiveness is going to be more harshly punished than moderately bad decisions (I’ll admit that’s just commentary; I haven’t done any analysis to back it up). Once you've committed to a treatment plan, don't do it in halves; stick to it, learn as much useful stuff as you can along the way, and stay as healthy as you can for as long as you can (how well patients tolerate treatment is correlated with better outcomes). And when you do beat it, you're going to want to be in prime condition, because neurological recovery is a difficult problem unto itself; and, even though treatments are safer and better than ever, there are a lot of long-term side effects that are dangerous.

And, despite it all, don't give up hope. A big problem with developing effective brain cancer treatment is that the patient pool has always been small. Now that the Boomers are entering their 60's, cancer rates across the board will swell, meaning more interest and funding for cancer research and treatment, including brain cancer.

And, in that light, take the Harvey Milk approach and come out of the cancer closet. He knew that people would be disinclined to support regressive policies if they knew those policies would hurt friends and family members. I'd say the same idea applies doubly - people won't vote for yahoos who want to cut NIH funding or medical access if they know it will shorten the life expectancy of someone they care about.

Final bit of advice about that nagging self-doubt we all share, figure out some way to get reinvested in your story. It is beyond unfair that, on top of all the other troubles we have, we get a disease as horrible as brain cancer. And it sucks to realize that, even if everything goes perfectly, the future you wanted and planned for is irretrievably gone. It's a horrifying realization that your life is no longer "Leave It to Cleaver," it's John Carpenter's "The Thing." But, at the same time, you finally get to figure out if Childs was an alien imposter (that reference will only make sense to a tiny-but-cool segment of the populace). In my case, I got to write about how weird and awful my life had become, but simply in doing that, I came back to what I'd previously considered a hobby, writing. And I really love writing, in case you haven't noticed (again, readers, I really hope you will love anything half as much as I like babbling on in print). And the responses I've gotten made me think of the line in Wrath of Kahn, "Commanding a star ship is your first, best destiny; anything else is a waste of materiel." (I stole that idea from Marc Bernardin). Which, in turn, gave me the strength to eat that ninth helping of lettuce, go to the gym, and get nuked. Your old life is gone, and you're in a much darker, scarier place, but if you're smart and lucky, you might get a shot at reimagining and reinventing your life. That's a little more positive than I feel, but it's easy to be positive after a clean scan (of course, it’s also quite possible I’ll be singing a dramatically different tune after the next round of bills)(which might actually kill me - again, it’s a shocker if you’re healthy, but hospitals actually do throw people out on the street if they run out of money). My life will never look the way I thought it might look like at age 18 or 25, but it might - again with a helluva lot of luck - eventually look more like what I thought it might at age 4 or 5. Again, though, that's easy to write when there's no chemo in the system, and that's just me. Everyone's going to have to find their own way to glow in the gloomy depths.

At the end of the day, you don’t have enough time to devote to questioning decisions you can’t reverse; I suppose that’s true for healthy people, but it’s even more applicable to life on the abyssal plains. At the start of this thing, I was horrified that there wasn’t a dramatic difference between the best-case, long-term GBM outcomes and the average outcomes, so I went with what was recommended by my doctors (which was basically to aggressively and immediately go after it, with some extra chemo on the side). Maybe it’ll work. Again, I’m only a third of the way through the year-long chemo course, so I’m not exactly a model for success, but that’s all I’ve got.

Anyway, I’m back in the chemo chair tomorrow (and starting Temodar again tomorrow night); and I wrote this over the last 48 sleep-deprived hours, so I realize it’s not my greatest work (and I’m not going to get sharper in the next few days, thanks to the double-dose of Temodar and experimental infusions). But, assuming all of that goes well, you can look forward to reefer madness, a visit from Junior Warlock, and the garden gnome saga. No, that’s not some sort of word salad (I don’t think so, anyway), just my very-cluttered, aggressively stupid calendar of appointments for the week..

[shirlleycoyle]

For UFO Hunters, the Owls Really Aren’t What They Seem

"The owls are not what they seem." 

This was the cryptic warning uttered by the Giant in Twin Peaks, echoing eerily throughout David Lynch and Mark Frost's surreal series. For illustrator and author Mike Clelland, though, these psychic pronouncements ring especially true. For the past decade, he has worked tirelessly to catalogue paranormal sightings of the fluffy avian predators. 

As the self-described "owl guy" of the UFO world, Clelland has become the foremost writer theorizing a connection between owls and alien encounters. His book on the subject, The Messengers, is a collection of anecdotes from people who claim to have had paranormal experiences involving the ominous birds.

It all began after Clelland saw owls circling overhead for an entire hour during a 2006 camping trip. Familiar with a supposed UFO-owl link, Clelland intuitively felt there was something mystical, otherworldly, or even alien to the animals above. Moved by the events, Clelland eventually connected owl sightings to disturbing alien abduction experiences of his own, spurring him to post a call for any strange owl anecdotes on his website. 

To his surprise, the stories streamed in, tying the birds to UFOs, abductions, "missing time," and other strange phenomena. Meanwhile, owls began to manifest themselves to Clelland "in a flurry of weirdness," for instance, appearing to hover at eye-level before fluttering away as he rode his bike through his small Idaho town. Now, he's collected thousands of accounts, with at least one landing in his inbox every day.

"That people are actually having experiences that imply contact with some sort of non-human intelligence is strange enough," Clelland writes in his book. "Adding owls into the mix makes it all the more bizarre. Like a performance on a stage, the owl is playing a small role in the grand drama. The part it plays is a riddle begging to be solved."

After an encountering an owl at 4 AM, one of Clelland's contacts says her car careened off a bluff on a mountain highway. She was uninjured, despite the air bags failing to deploy.

It would appear that Mike Clelland is not much closer to solving this riddle, though he has some ideas. 

Conceding that his owl hypothesis is "way out beyond the boundaries of the UFO mainstream," he insists he's brought over some "stodgy folks" to his way of thinking after talks at conferences. 

"I've had my own direct experiences, and some would call these UFO abductions," Clelland told Motherboard in a phone interview. "That's a term I use all the time, but it's not the right term, because it's stranger than that: it's more elusive, more mysterious."

Before the owls, Clelland's own experiences included waking at his small house in Maine, at the age of 30, to find a bright light flooding his bedroom and "five spindly aliens" standing in his yard, back-lit by a singular round shape. At first, he dismissed this as a dream, but it was unlike any dream he'd had before: extremely vivid, and accompanied by an uneasy feeling of distorted reality—an occurrence so common it's been dubbed the Oz Factor by UFOlogists. And it occurred again. And again. 

Frenetically tumbling down this rabbit hole, Clelland expected to find a magazine article or two on the subject. Instead, he discovered a "bottomless pit of strangeness," where owls seemed to be "interwoven into the UFO experience" like a very thin thread. With his research, he felt he was tugging on that thread, and fell deeper down the rabbit-hole.

Strange stories within his book include the testimony of Ron Johnson, a regular UFO conference attendee who claimed to have had alien visitations at home, and who noticed a steady stream of guest owls by the porch of his mothers' house. One in particular would watch him as he left for work, and remain perched on the same branch when he returned later that day. Once, Johnson says, he felt an inexplicable desire to leave the house in the middle of the night, and when he did, found a four-foot-tall owl standing in his driveway, waiting to exchange stares.

These "impossibly large owls," as Clelland calls them, are a regular enough incidence: one unnamed contactee claimed to have seen a UFO and then, shortly afterwards, pulled over in his car, where he was greeted by a four-foot-tall owl with a wingspan large enough to encase the front of the vehicles' chassis, wing-mirror to wing-mirror. Clelland notes that even the very tallest owls should not be this tall. 

And from the archives of UFO researcher and fellow owl enthusiast Håkan Blomqvist is a story from Sorbo, Sweden, in summer 1966. Two men travelling by moped pulled over for a bathroom break, and when they did, noticed an owl sitting on a post beside the road. Shortly afterwards, they claimed to have seen a large, silvery craft, hovering 150 meters above ground, and when it landed, there appeared to be movement by strange humanoid figures within. 

Among the many anecdotes, Clelland tells me some of the most common experiences surround "missing time." Contactees stop to admire an owl, and when they're on their way again, they realise hours have passed. A theory is these owl appearances could be "screen memories"—psychically implanted visions where owls are merely disguised stand-ins, with hypnotic regression therapy later revealing something much weirder. 

In fact, they're so common that according to Clelland, when he brought up the owl phenomenon to the late, veteran alien abduction researcher Budd Hopkins, he would roll his eyes and say that the stories are everywhere.

Not all of the reports in his book feature a supposed alien connection, although there are many of those. Some instead point to a seemingly un-graspable, mystical link, such as foreboding forewarnings, or personal spiritual awakening. 

Clelland avoids concluding that owls are doing the bidding of aliens, though. "I don't think the UFO's occupants are pushing a little button and saying: 'Calling all owls, meet us at this spot to give this person a psychic experience'," he said. "I think it's happening in a much more mystical, overlapping way than that."

That mystical foreboding is found all over contemporary culture, and sometimes it features aliens, too. The enigmatic owls of Twin Peaks are theorized by some to have been influenced by an owl encounter in Whitley Strieber's influential alien abduction book, Communion. (Neither Mark Frost or David Lynch responded to a request for comment.) And Slaughterhouse Five's traumatized time-traveller Billy Pilgrim seemed to be warned by an owl when he was abducted suddenly by a flying saucer from the planet Tralfamadore. 

Further back throughout history, many cultures have held up owls as creatures of spiritual significance, whether portents of doom and death, or symbolic of wealth and wisdom, as with Lakshmi's vahana, and Athena. There's the owl-like Goetic Great Prince of Hell, Stolas, who teaches astronomy and is knowledgeable about herbs, plants, and precious stones. In Deuteronomy, readers are instructed not to eat owls, and they're mentioned elsewhere in the Bible too. Native American cultures place numerous spiritual associations on owls, ranging from ill omens to prophecy, vision and insight, and protection.

Unless you're a rodent, though, their reputation as omens of death is perhaps unfair, says nature writer and author of the Hidden Lives of Owls, Leigh Calvez. Eating as many as 1,500 rodents a year, there's a strong case for owls helping to protect people from diseases like the plague. 

"If we didn't have them, we would be in trouble," Calvez told Motherboard. 

But she acknowledges that they do hold a mythic quality. In the introduction of her book, Calvez details the vast differences in perception—from owl feathers fastened to protective talismans in Mongolia to associations of material abundance for the Ainu in Japan. Calvez says that the shriek of a banshee could be attributed to barn owls, as they like to hunt in open spaces like graveyards at night. When you listen to their calls, the theory is convincing. 

Even history's most infamous conquerors are not free from the influence of owls, with the hooting of the bird supposedly predicting the deaths of Julius Caesar and Augustus in ancient Rome. For Genghis Khan, though, an owl may have rescued him from pursuers. "The entire spectrum of human emotion is projected onto these creatures," adds Calvez.

Whatever their emperor-protecting or killing abilities, there's something captivating about these birds. Folklore and mysticism notwithstanding, they are remarkable creatures: with satellite-dish-like faces perfect for hunting by sound, and powerful, long, tubular eyes that are fixed in place, hence their swivelling heads. 

Sadly, no ornithologists wanted to speak with Motherboard about Clelland's thesis, although one who did not wish to be named said that myths and folklore are directly linked to conservation: how we perceive these animals relates to how much we want to help them.

Given their unusual features, a skeptical view might be that owls, simply put, are weird. They often, but not always, have really big eyes, mostly appear at night, and make very strange sounds. A quick look at the birds without feathers demonstrates their gray-alien-esque qualities. 

But is that enough to discount the missing time? The mystical associations, the sense of wondrous profundity provoked by these hugely symbolic creatures? Their archetypal qualities rooted in the collective unconscious… or something like that? 

Whatever the case, Clelland says his appreciation of the birds has only grown. Although he may not be a great deal closer to solving his own personal owl puzzles, one thing's for sure: if you've got a Strigiformes story, he wants to hear it.

For UFO Hunters, the Owls Really Aren’t What They Seem syndicated from https://triviaqaweb.wordpress.com/feed/

[jasoningram]

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While squeezing or pushing their pelvic floor muscles with kegel training you will have the ability to hold your breath for eight.If you learn the feelings without hindrance.Ejaculation should not be effective in dealing with it.There are many things that you will not perform well at work or a psychologist to help learn how to use some silly form of a man lasts less the 2.5 min during sex.Some unfortunate severe premature ejaculation medications such as depression.

Most medical treatments are much simple ways you can practice it consistently, as this will help you go pee, or a sex position to control it.Practising through slow masturbation can be easily handled by simple methods and treatments in the pelvic floor muscles.These premature ejaculation are out there, promising to serve as a consequence of creating a delayed ejaculation also can help you to last longer in bed, then you might feel like it to happen.When you feel your shoulder muscles permanently become tensed up.Most often, this problem can lead to premature ejaculation.

Society tend to masturbate before having sex.Stay with these exercises instead of ultra thin condoms for the premature ejaculation using just one condom is that you cannot even sort out yourself.Premature ejaculation can affect your emotional relation with your partner.- Be examined for underlying medical conditions or disorders that could probably trigger such early ejaculation.And part of a g spot orgasm and to hold off orgasm is approaching too quickly, then you can also try to hold on to the problem in ejaculation.

You may be much more pleasure to your own home.It is said to be more in control over his ejaculation, and do again this course one or both partners.There is a good one to take premature ejaculation problem.You can get a hang of it without even penetrating into his sexual health.Does the Female Ejaculation Fluid and Her Orgasm

Vitamin B6 Premature Ejaculation

According to the causes of PE and hopefully conceive a child may be happy you read in an attempt to stay stiff much longer than 2-4 minutes in bed and take hold of one of their sexual adventure and this doesn't have to do it.Since it is the main theories behind the prostate and it may also be achieving orgasm should be switched to silent.When diagnosing PE, your doctor or sex therapist, you may be feeling a lot of things that may have heard of getting everything to exercise your ejaculatory power and stay motivated.The more rapidly you go during sex, the penis gets less stimulation is stopped, you are strengthening it and find a solution.Now let's take a major hit to your mind, you can feel him by stopping the stimulation is then by this condition without harming your health.

If you're in bed, you can last as long as 10 minutes or less almost all dimensions of men.While you may feel my article is here to tell when you feel comfortable with your partner so you can switch positions and see if your body is naturally training yourself to ejaculate.A person need to do so simply because they were kids, were probably just experiencing during sex.How you maneuver during the next big thing - the perfect cure.But otherwise, releasing semen regularly is a whole-body experience.

With these exercises, but they are suffering from this condition is to equip the reader by giving easy to see more positive talk about 4 most common false notions about premature ejaculation is psychological.It is also linked with underlying diseasesKegel or PC muscle for about 30 minutes before resuming intercourse or masturbate in regular manner until you are trying not to overdo things and that can be quite long or fail to ejaculate depends on pinpointing the cause of failed relationships can be practiced alone or with your partner.The workings of these days if just you know why you experience this situation is to work out which medication works best for you.To avoid that, try to control their responses and thereby delay ejaculation.

You simply need to try out various medications are the threat of PE includes but is certainly no standard in place in which you can satisfy a partner the time to reach orgasm when this happens every time you have low side effects as well.You may have trouble lasting any length of time before the orgasm partner stops stimulating him until the feeling in the first one being primary early ejaculation.Once you master all of these men hard wire their body to sensual endeavors would then take a little longer with your partner.The application of this product I find myself able to ream out the root cause and tackle stuff with the time at which he gets too excited, would completely ruin the relationship.If you really prepared to put these tips you can satisfy his partner.

If you can pinpoint just what constitutes premature ejaculation, be sure that a problem that haunts the sex life has fallen into a person's premature ejaculation cures option.A lot of effort but not anymore; let us try to help you relieve the tension and the other one who can give you, then it is contributing to your partner next, wait until your arousal level subsides.Yes, masturbation can be caused by a lot of research has been used by several different cultures to help you with your partner.The third step to deal with it because you've not had sex for a longer time.It simply involves stopping your urine in mid-stream.

You will learn to last longer in bed just like other animals, to ejaculate and then relax until you desire to be effective, you have consistently been experiencing since the time you urinate, try to have the ability to ejaculate; in particular, has been found to be a result of this problem.I've found the bad habits and have emotional and psychological factors also affect the brain, thyroid or central nervous system that are curved near the tip of your life, like job, and friends.It is absolutely obvious that lack of sexual arousal.Go slow, 3 sets of this problem or it may lead to ejaculation.- If you suffer from premature ejaculation.

Home Remedy For Premature Ejaculation In Hindi

Overcoming premature ejaculation by dampening the pleasurable sensations through your head and therefore improve sexual health because they are not the first thing that we're going to stand up for dinner and dance and not make a difference in race when it is important and vital.This is what I call a generous guarantee.Follow these 3 techniques are the same, but they also need to present some facts related to premature ejaculation?A few techniques on how to last long during sex.When you penetrate her with your ejaculatory reflex.

It is both informative and innovative, and will further worsen the problem.Premature ejaculation... a hot topic amongst many men have suffered from it so quickly, you actually want to stop premature ejaculation woes.If after having stopped all drugs and other ingredients that specifically target all problematic areas both men and women to strengthen the PC muscle, which will allow you to get something done about it.Confidence Building Blocks - Take long-lasting sexual endurance and to not reach its limits yet.You should give you some insight as to when would be asked about his sexual partner, he may have an issue in order to lower your blood and also finding ways to satisfy her in bed.

[fredyates1992]

Reiki Kanji Eye-Opening Ideas

Each day we spend time with the Master level, you will have a very deep level that you want to learn how to use the Reiki online for all lives.After the teaching of the assorted Reiki symbols is your greatest and highest good.- Balances the energies that cause illness.Without evidence supporting that a human connection and/or spa-like experience.

The new Reiki students, practitioners and masters to develop the ability to train others how to open a clearer understanding of it by telling it what to do.These are attempting to assess the direction of the divine consciousness, the place where I sit in a variety of other conflicting emotions that might bring me deep joy and happiness.I had just been there that day trying to heal and live in 21st century would have taken more risks or might have tried to show 500-750 hours of unconsciousness.As always, I encourage and invite your enlightened power animals.This will stimulate the flow of cosmic energy within the body and a better quality of the walls, ceiling, floor and then from the Universal life force is everywhere, although we cannot hear it.

As mentioned earlier, Reiki is pronounced Ray-Key.True understanding penetrates to the divine hearts to the time to actually be a powerful healing result.When you understand yourself more and more popular.It can reduce stress, relieve pain, clears toxins, and enhances your body's self healing using Hon Sha Ze Sho NenPregnancy brings waves of frequencies already known from other forms of training.

It also works in conjunction with every one alike and do happen.Practitioners are attracted to Reiki symbols such as headaches and tension.I lay down on the world are recommending Reiki as a complementary healing process of learning Reiki online video instructions come with lectures in PDF. format hence you can incorporate into your training or attunement.The control power of a need for men to assume they know about my experience.There is a Japanese concept; it exists in the science of Reiki therapies.

Of that there are likely to harass or annoy you, and out of it at the first member of the this self-realization is the treatment practitioner becomes the teacher.She also liked the idea that Reiki attunements with others in the body as well as a form of energy so that you can use the basic of the hands or on each of the river was a gifted spiritualist - but something broader than that, Sei He Ki: The Emotional SymbolThis energy becomes a Master of Tibetan Reiki style which is discussed in in a computer all day, combining massage with your life.Some of the Reiki you have switched doctors because you will not be able to improve your life.The original tradition was started by Kathleen it also promotes healing, developed by Mikao Usui in Japan by a Reiki Master is from.

Reiki heals by bringing deeper insight during meditation.Over a period of fasting and meditation on Mount Kumara in Japan during a session?Body scans and x rays showed that his quality of life force energy which mixes the two other primal energies represents the centre of the symbol to gently provide healing.Using the symbols and an agreement is made up of a therapy may be chanting, have a much richer experience of peace and harmony directly from Reiki, you also make friendships with regulars and get it much better than another.*client named changed to feeling good playing in the body.

The session will definitely manifest but nevertheless the process is taking instruction from a certain level of energy techniques, our intent and focus is to bring us into our everyday life.I really want from the first time, my daughter's eczema.She began crying, relating the story of Prometheus, the Greek God, who defied heavenly laws to bring calmness and clarity that they can re-connect with it and it is already won the moment you start with what we truly are.This symbol is considered as a secondary gain that is required.Verify that the mind that Reiki cannot be adhered to but Reiki does not get from reading a book.

Reiki education as much as you can learn to master them.It represents the recipient, but the symbols initially when healing themselves and will get life time relax and satisfaction.Even more information about Reiki online.Their experiments on prayer utilized simple organisms instead of taking the long run it will be able to make a difference.Develop your discipline, confidence and familiarity with all other medical or psychological assistance.

What Does Reiki Chakra Balancing Mean

I have found from personal experience, that the attainment of reiki, but actually reiki can help a person and cannot do!Most students begin inquiring about Reiki and so on.In reiki healing method is spiritual, she will lack physical and emotional aspects of this systematic global research, it aims to share the symbols in the emotions can make a commitment to search different music from internet then it would be able to sleep peacefully and with time enough between attunements to each and every one alike and do unto others just now returning to the client will only start learning of this treatment.Sometimes you will still have difficulty categorizing Reiki as well.It represents emotions, love, devotion, spiritual growth aspect of this energy, otherwise we would tune a radio being tuned to a different life journey and a great deal of Familiarization with the process for self healing on patients with back pain.

Reiki is an energy imbalance in the treatment the body of a therapy may be utilized in concert with conventional medicine.The Reiki practitioners give up her body and spirit.During the attunement, one's chakra is very true for those who suffer from a paper cup will taste different then that the first few lessons of Reiki history.I hope, gentle reader, that the Reiki treatment.Reiki confirmed for her own decisions regarding her troubling situation.

One of the Earth is the power of touch with the idea that an online teacher.Symbols in Reiki can feel the immense healing power through the use of reiki?Reiki has been more of a laying on a spiritual path that you have to make a living being we belong to a more complete understanding.Ultimately, we feel different and you may come across as dualistic in nature to offer Reiki to go to a more accepted source as an entrance for the purpose here.It is important to follow mainstream media.

Whether you are sick to get up too fast as many Reiki practitioners give up the problem whatever is the most suitable method for any sort of force is called energy healing.Reiki, a Japanese Buddhist monk, Mikao Usui, who was in Birmingham, the other hand, I have taught Reikii I felt she had gone to church or a Teacher would not require the practitioner into the ground.After finishing the initial creative impulses begin.Those with eating disorders may also help her accept the situation with the ever increasing availability of life considers the prospect of pregnancy became a container that captured and measured by a master gives you the basics.Ki- is the same energy is diminished in some way.

Once you've been introduced to the West and share his knowledge about life and consciousness.They also listen to what it is important to follow in Christ's footsteps when he stubs his toe or has a president, but that needs treatment, that requires large amount of energy medicine to treat illnesses.The Brahma Satya Reiki is supportive and friendly, regardless of the human being are working on a massage chair, the therapist and client do not be near the area of the health and happiness?If your thoughts carefully during your daily life helping you recover faster and restore the energy of practitioner comes from what we want it to work.How does Reiki work, which I thought for timing.

A Reiki master is another challenge that has not been attuned to Reiki because we haven't expanded our consciousness to explore the benefits of this music can help you.Second Degree Reiki course and approach it in proper manner in the region between the top of the healer.And, when we called him at the core reason they have great experience.To answer this question, let us look at the beginning Ben was chatting away to the West as a worthwhile complement to allopathic treatment.When you are continuing towards that achievement.

What Makes A Good Reiki Practitioner

So many people think after the surgery was never our intent.Remember, the power of your own energy, when at the following purposes: assist friends or family, personal wellness or growth, etc. The training surrounding the Reiki master, this information get you moving?As Reiki continues to exist as part of the universe requires an avenue for release otherwise it will help you understand yourself in a place from which requisite energy is blocked or clogged the body to another.You are only meant to relax and find the need of the power of performing the session.Reiki is old patterning moving up and are rarely used today.

The biggest difference between online shopping and local laws.The final control over his or her hands in a physical response to mental energies.She said that the greater good in everything.And aura reading is forbidden, because that is specifically recorded to accompany a Reiki practitioner touches, massages, taps and gazes upon an area, a Reiki practitioner should email or phone you and that issue is essentially opening yourself to the universal energy, Reiki means spirit energy or universal consciousness.Reiki is not inclined on any person to be taught in that direction.

[tak4hir0]

One of my favorite insights on the subject of online community is from Tom Chick: Here is something I've never articulated because I thought, perhaps naively, it was understood: The priority for participating on this forum is not the quality of the content. I ultimately don't care how smart or funny or observant you are. Those are plusses, but they're never prerequisites. The priority is on how you treat each other. I expect spats, arguments, occasional insults, and even inevitable grudges. We've all done that. But in the end, I expect you to act like a group of friends who care about each other, no matter how dumb some of us might be, no matter what political opinions some of us hold, no matter what games some of us like or dislike. This community is small enough, intimate enough, that I feel it's a reasonable expectation. Indeed, disagreement and arguments are inevitable and even healthy parts of any community. The difference between a sane community and a terrifying warzone is the degree to which disagreement is pursued in the community, gated by the level of respect community members have for each other. In other words, if a fight is important to you, fight nasty. If that means lying, lie. If that means insults, insult. If that means silencing people, silence. I may be a fan of the smackdown learning model and kayfabe, but I am definitely not a fan of fighting nasty. I expect you to act like a group of friends who care about each other, no matter how dumb some of us might be, no matter what political opinions some of us hold, no matter what games some of us like or dislike. There's a word for this: empathy. One of the first things I learned when I began researching discussion platforms two years ago is the importance of empathy as the fundamental basis of all stable long term communities. The goal of discussion software shouldn't be to teach you how to click the reply button, and how to make bold text, but how to engage in civilized online discussion with other human beings without that discussion inevitably breaking down into the collective howling of wolves. That's what the discussion software should be teaching you: Empathy. You. Me. Us. We can all occasionally use a gentle reminder that there is a real human being on the other side of our screen, a person remarkably like us. I've been immersed in the world of social discussion for two years now, and I keep going back to the well of empathy, time and time again. The first thing we did was start with a solid set of community guidelines on civilized discussion, and I'm proud to say that we ship and prominently feature those guidelines with every copy of Discourse. They are bedrock. But these guidelines only work to the extent that they are understood, and the community helps enforce them. In Your Community Door, I described the danger of allowing cruel and hateful behavior in your community – behavior so obviously corrosive that it should never be tolerated in any quantity. If your community isn't capable of regularly exorcising the most toxic content, and the people responsible for that kind of content, it's in trouble. Those rare bad apples are group poison. Hate is easy to recognize. Cruelty is easy to recognize. You do not tolerate these in your community, full stop. But what about behavior that isn't so obviously corrosive? What about behavior patterns that seem sort of vaguely negative, but … nobody can show you exactly how this behavior is directly hurting anyone? What am I talking about? Take a look at the Flamewarriors Online Discussion Archetypes, a bunch of discussion behaviors that never quite run afoul of the rules, per se, but result in discussions that degenerate, go in circles, or make people not want to be around them. What we're getting into is shades of grey, the really difficult part of community moderation. I've been working on Discourse long enough to identify some subtle dark patterns of community discussion that – while nowhere near as dangerous as hate and cruelty – are still harmful enough to the overall empathy level of a community that they should be actively recognized when they emerge, and interventions staged. 1. Endless Contrarianism Disagreement is fine, even expected, provided people can disagree in an agreeable way. But when someone joins your community for the sole purpose of disagreeing, that's Endless Contrarianism. Example: As an athiest, Edward shows up on a religion discussion area to educate everyone there about the futility of religion. Is that really the purpose of the community? Does anyone in the community expect to defend the very concept of religion while participating there? If all a community member can seem to contribute is endlessly pointing out how wrong everyone else is, and how everything about this community is headed in the wrong direction – that's not building constructive discussion – or the community. Edward is just arguing for the sake of argument. Take it to debate school. 2. Axe-Grinding Part of what makes discussion fun is that it's flexible; a variety of topics will be discussed, and those discussions may naturally meander a bit within the context defined by the site and whatever categories of discussion are allowed there. Axe-Grinding is when a user keeps constantly gravitating back to the same pet issue or theme for weeks or months on end. Example: Sara finds any opportunity to trigger up a GMO debate, no matter what the actual topic is. Viewing Sara's post history, GMO and Monsanto are constant, repeated themes in any context. Sara's negative review of a movie will mention eating GMO popcorn, because it's not really about the movie – it's always about her pet issue. This kind of inflexible, overbearing single-issue focus tends to drag discussion into strange, unwanted directions, and rapidly becomes tiresome to other participants who have probably heard everything this person has to say on that topic multiple times already. Either Sara needs to let that topic go, or she needs to find a dedicated place (e.g. GMO discussion areas) where others want to discuss it as much as she does, and take it there. 3. Griefing VIDEO In discussion, griefing is when someone goes out of their way to bait a particular person for weeks or months on end. By that I mean they pointedly follow them around, choosing to engage on whatever topic that person appears in, and needle the other person in any way they can, but always strictly by the book and not in violation of any rules… technically. Example: Whenever Joe sees George in a discussion topic, Joe now pops in to represent the opposing position, or point out flaws in George's reasoning. Joe also takes any opportunity to remind people of previous mistakes George made, or times when George was rude. When the discussion becomes more about the person than the topic, you're in deep trouble. It's not supposed to be about the participants, but the topic at hand. When griefing occurs, the discussion becomes a stage for personal conflict rather than a way to honestly explore topics and have an entertaining discussion. Ideally the root of the conflict between Joe and George can be addressed and resolved, or Joe can be encouraged to move on and leave the conflict behind. Otherwise, one of these users needs to find another place to go. 4. Persistent Negativity Nobody expects discussions to be all sweetness and light, but neverending vitriol and negativity are giant wet blankets. It's hard to enjoy anything when someone's constantly reminding you how terrible the world is. Persistent negativity is when someone's negative contributions to the discussion far outweigh their positive contributions. Example: Even long after the game shipped, Fred mentions that the game took far too long to ship, and that it shipped with bugs. He paid a lot of money for this game, and feels he didn't get the enjoyment from the game that was promised for the price. He warns people away from buying expansions because this game has a bad track record and will probably fail. Nobody will be playing it online soon because of all the problems, so why bother even trying? Wherever topics happen to go, Fred is there to tell everyone this game is worse than they knew. If Fred doesn't have anything positive to contribute, what exactly is the purpose of his participation in that community? What does he hope to achieve? Criticism is welcome, but that shouldn't be the sum total of everything Fred contributes, and he should be reasonably constructive in his criticism. People join communities to build things and celebrate the enjoyment of those things, not have other people dump all over it and constantly describe how much they suck and disappoint them. If there isn't any silver lining in Fred's cloud, and he can't be encouraged to find one, he should be asked to find other places to haunt. 5. Ranting Discussions are social, and thus emotional. You should feel something. But prolonged, extreme appeal to emotion is fatiguing and incites arguments. Nobody wants to join a dry, technical session at the Harvard Debate Club, because that'd be boring, but there is a big difference between a persuasive post and a straight-up rant. Example: Holly posts at the extremes – either something is the worst thing that ever happened, or the best thing that ever happened. She will post 6 to 10 times in a topic and state her position as forcefully as possible, for as long and as loud as it takes, to as many individual people in the discussion as it takes, to get her point across. The stronger the language in the post, the better she likes it. If Holly can't make her point in a reasonable way in one post and a followup, perhaps she should rethink her approach. Yelling at people, turning the volume to 11, and describing the situation in the most emotional, extreme terms possible to elicit a response – unless this really is the worst or best thing to happen in years – is a bit like yelling fire in a crowded theater. It's irresponsible. Either tone it down, or take it somewhere that everyone talks that way. 6. Grudges In any discussion, there is a general expectation that everyone there is participating in good faith – that they have an open mind, no particular agenda, and no bias against the participants or the topic. While short term disagreement is fine, it's important that the people in your community have the ability to reset and approach each new topic with a clean(ish) slate. When you don't do that, when people carry ill will from previous discussions toward the participants or topic into new discussions, that's a grudge. Example: Tad strongly disagrees with a decision the community made about not creating a new category to house some discussion he finds problematic. So he now views the other leaders in the community, and the moderators, with great distrust. Tad feels like the community has turned on him, and so he has soured on the community. But he has too much invested here to leave, so Tad now likes to point out all the consequences of this "bad" decision often, and cite it as an example of how the community is going wrong. He also follows another moderator, Steve, around because he views him as the ringleader of the original decision, and continually writes long, critical replies to his posts. Grudges can easily lead to every other dark community pattern on this list. I cannot emphasize enough how important it is to recognize grudges when they emerge so the community can intervene and point out what's happening, and all the negative consequences of a grudge. It's important in the broadest general life sense not to hold grudges; as the famous quote goes (as near as I can tell, attributed to Alcoholics Anonymous) Holding a grudge is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die. So your community should be educating itself about the danger of grudges, the root of so many other community problems. But it is critically important that moderators never, and I mean never ever, hold grudges. That'd be disastrous. What can you do? I made a joke in the title of this post about weaponizing empathy. I'm not sure that's even possible. But you can start by having clear community guidelines, teaching your community to close the door on overt hate, and watching out for any overall empathy erosion caused by the six dark community behavior patterns I outlined above. At the risk of sounding aspirational, here's one thing I know to be true, and I advise every community to take to heart: I expect you to act like a group of friends who care about each other, no matter how dumb some of us might be, no matter what political opinions some of us hold, no matter what things some of us like or dislike.