#the blimps are very clever! ;)

[britishchick09]

this 'clarissa' ep is in spanish... but the intro is in english!

...except for one thing ;)

[usafphantom2]

What did the guy in the backseat do?

Basically they did everything but fly the plane. They controlled all of the reconnaissance they were able to override flight plans, and quickly calculate a new plan. They could manually operate the cameras if necessary, and they kept the airplane safe. The RSO short for reconnaissance systems officer were in charge of electrical countermeasures. Flying the SR -71 was hard work you had to think very fast! A two-Person team made a safer airplane.

The SR-71 was one of the first aircraft to feature a “Deception Jammer “ I think this is fascinating and so inventive since it was made in the early 60s. The device was designed to absorb and memorize an enemy radar single as it hit the reconnaissance plane and sent back a radar single similar to the SR 71, but STRONGER then, projecting away from the plane, the trick was designed to confuse the enemy radar operator by making him see a “ghost blimp on the scope!

This is so clever, no wonder my father and my neighbors who all flew the SR 71 couldn’t wait to get back in the air again. In the 1960s the SR 71 was the coolest airplane in the world. In my opinion, it still is.

Linda Sheffield

@Habubrats71 via X

[cinemaocd]

Jenny's ongoing list of films watched 2024

January

RRR (2023)*

Peter's Friends (1992)*

The Lady Eve (1941)

How to Get a Head in Advertising (1988)*

High Fidelity (2000)

Frieda (1947)*

Oh...Rosalinda! (1955)

The Quick and the Dead (1995)*

The Barefoot Contessa (1954)*

The Life and Death of Col. Blimp (1943) Commentary Track (2012)*

Rhubarb (1951)*

The Birds (1963)*

House of Yes (1997)*

Cassandra Cat (1963)*

Foreign Correspondent (1940)

The Long Goodbye (1973)

Night of the Comet (1984)

The Day the Earth Caught Fire (1961)*

For Me and My Gal (1942)*

The Grand Budapest Hotel (2014)

The Small, Back Room (1949)

House of Games (1987)

Water (1985)*

The Ballad of John and Yoko (2023)*

The Meaning of Life (1983)

Track 29 (1988)*

*New to me

Thoughts on the New to Me films:

New Year's Eve we watched RRR, a lot of fun, energetic, bright and action-packed. I enjoyed the way that little attention was given to the British characters. They were straight up villains in ill fitting ahistorical costumes, kind of like the way Indian/Asian characters are treated in Western films most of the time...$$$

New Year's Day we watched Peter's Friends, a drama/comedy from the early 90s starring all of the famous Cambridge Footlights. Big Chill-ish film set in a country house over the Christmas holidays. $$$

How to Get a Head in Advertising was weird and also really good. Had a similar vibe to Withnail and I (possibly because of Richard E. Grant, but also possibly the mixture of the surreal with the realistic). Quite stage-y in some ways but clever and savage in it's satire of life in the 80s. $$$

Frieda: Oh I loved this! Weird World War II melodrama about a German girl marrying a British boy and all the trouble it causes with his complex family situation. Such a stellar cast including the late, great Glynnis Johns. $$$$

The Quick and the Dead: I set my expectations quite low for this and was pleasantly surprised. I liked Sam Raimi's comic book-y take on gunfighters and esp. loved Sharon Stone's character. We love to see a female action hero with no love interest. A nice twist on the Man with no Name trope. Excellent cast as well with Russell Crowe, Gene Hackman, Roy Scheider and Woody Stroud in his final film. $$$

The Barefoot Contessa: Joseph Mankewitcz is one of the geniuses of old Hollywood but this ain't it, chief. Just kind of all of the place melodrama that makes no sense and relies too much on Ava Gardner looking amazing in technicolor in the South of France. A bit of a commentary on Grace Kelly who a few years earlier married minor royalty on the Riviera. Even Rossano Brazzi can't save this mess for me. $

Rhubarb: Two genres I usually kind of hate (family-friendly animal centered film, sports film) combined into one and it's actually a lot of fun. Ray Milland and a bunch of classic character actors as the baseball team (also Leonard Nemoy has a tiny part as a mobster) in this slight/ predictable romp. $$

The Birds: Woah, shit this was good. I should have known. Amazing tension created and Hitchcock just sells the surreal horror with lots of rear projection...so. much. rear. projection. $$$

House of Yes: How about House of NOPE. Ugh what a mess this was. Some good performances and intriguing story, but it was very stagey and I don't know why the 90s couldn't make a story about adult children and their parents without reducing everyone to cliches and stereotypes but this and Six Degrees of Separation are definitely guilty of that, but the latter is just a better film. $

Cassandra Cat: Takes a long time to get to the cat which given that this was a family film from the 60s might be a problem for some viewers, expecting a more cat-centric movie. Interesting riff on fairy tales from the Czech New Wave. Beautiful Demy-esque technicolor and settings make this 60s nonsense fly by. $$

The Day the Earth Caught Fire: 60s nuclear panic disaster film that really just shows the earth as it is now in the throws of global warming. Yikes. Thoughtfully written and well acted by a bunch of folks I'd never heard of. $$

For Me and My Gal: Directed by Busby Berkley and starring Gene Kelly and Judy Garland and set in the 1920s on the Vaudeville circuit, I was expecting a lot more fun, dancing, color, costumes etc. This is actually more of a black and white war time melodrama with some music shoved into it and the dancing is very rudimentary. (I think this is probably because Garland esp. at this stage wasn't in the same league with Gene Kelly and I think it would have been too noticable...). Filmed at the entry of America into WW2 this was quite a deliberate propaganda piece. $$

TLADOCB Commentary: I've watched this movie 20 times at least but the commentary really made me think about a bunch of things differently. Can't say I recommend unless you are fanatic though as it's obviously pieced together from interviews Michael Powell and Martin Scorcese $$

Water (1985): If you smoke the exact right strain of sativa and ignore some of the more dated aspects of this 80s comedy, that reads as if Local Hero were a Cheech and Chong film--this is a total classic. Irreverent Michael Caine just straight up breaking character the minute he turns into a guerilla fighter in the jungle and being far too competent and cool, and then snapping back to sweetly shy, inept British Civil Servant, finding he actually loves his hated backwater post (the invent Casara part Caribbean, part Devon Jurassic Coast) while having to actually do his job. Political satire and fully both barrels to Maggie Thatcher and Reagan. Good on em. Filmed in St. Lucia, the movie has a zany heart and little taste, hoovering up vast quantities of competent TV players from my youth: Herman Munster and Reginald Perrin to name but two. Awkward love story and some uneven acting from Valerie Perrin and Brenda Vaccaro. I enjoyed myself, heartily, anyway. $$$

The Ballad of John and Yoko: Technically a video essay with amazing production values (the licensing alone was epic) dragging together disparate topics around the central theme of women being blamed for bad things happening to infantalized male geniuses. Is it the most coherent argument? No. Does it absolutely tap into many unexpressed or implied ideas that have been floating around since me too? Absolutely. $$

Track 29: This was some of the worst casting I've ever seen in a film. When I think of Texas nurse who is into trains and spanking, I don't automatically think of comedian Sandra Bernhardt. When I think of an actress of that era who was old enough to play Gary Oldman's mother, I don't think of Theresa Russell who is the same age as Oldman and looked every bit as young as he did in the film. Maybe that was the point? I'm not sure. The story was weird, like a Southern Gothic melodrama/black comedy ala Flannery O'Connor, but there was something off about the whole thing.

[inspector-montoya-fox]

i’m currently away but i wanted to briefly discuss how some of the villains’ lairs/ interiors & exteriors contribute to their story and character. this is an aspect that has really evolved throughout the series: in Sly 1, the villains’ branding was absolutely horrific, each of them quite literally living inside replicas of themselves or decorating with stuff associated to their species. like Miss Clockwerk being quirky and building a huge tower of himself in the volcano as if it isn’t supposed to be a “secret” lair. or Muggshot taking over an entire city and filling it up with every possible symbol associated to dogs. bones? yeap. leashes? he’s got you covered. fire hydrants? fuck it. let’s just build a colossal fucking fire hydrant on the casino’s roof.

Sly 2′s villains retained some of this wackiness, like Rajan’s ancestral palace imitating an elephant, but there was much more to it. some were more straightforward like Arpeggio’s blimp flying higher than he ever could achieve with his wings, or Jean Bison’s rustic, log cabins being surrounded by sawing machinery showing how he is stuck in the past. Rajan’s ballroom matches the image he is so desperately trying to project: regal, successful, an international tycoon who loves to spend his money on his guests and his parties. after the Clockwerk wings are stolen and he migrates to the jungle however, his true self is revealed: brutal, unhinged, unpredictable. the jungle lair can also be described as such.

the most notable example however is the Contessa. in Jailbreak, the prison reflects her impenetrable mind and how clever a strategist she is. i think, apart from Neyla, she’s Sly 2′s most fierce villain and this is presented through the symbol of her prison, a thief’s worst nightmare. in comparison, after Interpol drops her and the odds are stacked against her, the re-education tower mirrors this by being an isolated and slender building. the Contessa’s on her own now and everyone else is catching up to her.

i’m probably gonna make a part 2 for this post because Sly 3 has lots to unpack in relation to this topic, but i really want to discuss the Black Baron’s castle. when i reblogged my analysis of gender in Flight of Fancy, i added this via the tags:

i mean i pretty much cover most of what i want to say here^ but to summarise even further: the episode’s major theme is masculinity being portrayed as a shallow mask for femininity because the latter is generally stigmatised and this is even reflected in Penelope’s lab being positioned behind the castle. the castle is synonymous with the Black Baron (strong, fortified, grand and superior), whereas the lab/hangar embodies Penelope and her facade (hidden, sneaky, blinded + overtaken by the Baron’s persona).

what i didn’t include in these tags however is that Sly is the one who scaled the castle but Bentley is the one who infiltrated the lab/hangar. the awkward switch from Sly to Bentley during the mission serves to foreshadow how Sly is the one who Penelope had a crush on but Bentley is the one who ultimately won her heart. Penelope’s crush on Sly is superficial, based on looks and nothing deeper (just like the Baron’s persona); but Bentley entering the metaphorical heart of the lair shows how he is the one Penelope is meant to be with and how only he can truly reach and understand her.

furthermore, the castle and its defenses come off as very cheap and plastic: there are hooks and poles for Sly to use everywhere and the catapult is just conveniently sitting at the top? it’s as if Penelope had a castle checklist and just wanted to make it look this way without it having the essence of one (like the Contessa’s estate for example). this reflects the Baron’s persona, whereas the lab which is highly guarded with advanced technology, is more true to the real Penelope.

so yea ! apologies if this reads out as rushed, i really wanna add to this post but these were the main points i wanted to get out first

[reynie-muldoons]

"A Gold Bar in Fort Knox" Liveblog!

Good morninggg. It's early here, but not very bright 😂 there's been a lot of fog the past few days.

Today's a fun day because season 4 of The Dragon Prince came out today too!! I can't wait to consume all of it and spam reblog things from the tag LMAO.

Anywaaay, I have some hot tea and brekkie, so it's new episode time. Spoilers under the cut :)

1:08 oh shit here we go, water polo raid

1:20 I bet they're above, like clinging to the wall or something

1:38 LMAO THEYRE DANGLING????

1:40 theme music my beloved

2:37 are they in like the boiler room?? That's kinda sick

2:50 OHHH are they plants?? Did Curtain's goons put them on the boat???

2:56 ayy same brain Reynie

3:12 Constance says "have faith in yourself". You go bbg 😂

3:36 they're just going to stay in the boiler room?? Do they realize how dangerous that could be, or how easy it would be for them to be spotted if a crew member came down for maintenance???

3:47 Constance has seen things

3:54 AYYYY blorbo

4:00 number two baby I love you but why are you going through the trash

4:08 both. both are correct. It's a scientific breakthrough that relies on manipulation

4:26 he's like "why, just why" 😂😂

4:34 LMAO why doesnt he want to tunnel? Do I detect some claustrophobia, hmm? 🧐

4:39 mold? Okay RE Village

4:49 HOW LONG WOULD IT TAKE TO GROW MOLD IN EVERY BUILDING LMFAOOO

4:59 "I didn't sign anything 🤨" LMAO TRUE ENOUGH BABE

5:01 okay but "troubling, but clever" describes SO MUCH of this show hahahaha

5:11 bestie..... I hate to break it to you........ but he is simply not interested in things that arent control

5:35 "to show how much of a genius he was" early signs of narcissism maybe? Cause that's the vibes I'm picking up

5:46 I think I see where this is going. Mr B desperately wants to get through to Curtain, Curtain ends up getting him in a vulnerable place, ends converting him to the fake happiness shtick. Please let me be wrong

5:55 "well that was on his turf." "SO IS THIS." she has a point there dude 😂

6:03 CO👏🏻RRECT👏🏻

6:08 "and I would love to find a phone" number two wants to scroll on that dash 😂

6:10 "Rhonda and Milligan must be sick with worry" I know that's what she meant but it made me laugh all the same

6:21 ohhhh nooooo. NOOOO. "At least Rhonda and Milligan are at home, away from danger." NOOOOOO

6:26 HARD cut to the blimp in a storm 😂

6:39 Milligan my love your original arrival was set to be 25 hours ahead of the kids, I think you'll be okay with a slight delay

6:49 Miss Perumal, as always, you are lovely and composed despite being full of worry

7:03 RHONDA MY BELOVED 😂😂😂 You truly know someone's character from the way they treat service workers!!!

7:08 I love her so much ahshdjjd

7:11 every shot of this ship is just fucking gorgeous

7:17 okay if the sugar was so all-important WHY LEAVE IT OUTSIDE DUDE LMAO

7:43 the speed check comes back to bite them!!

7:49 he looks genuinely scared to deliver this news 😬

8:03 low blood sugar, a faltering marriage, and liens on his big shit. Poor guy. btw I looked up "lien", it's basically legal rights to keep something, like a mortgage

8:17 awwwww. they're adorable. protect them at all costs

8:56 oh dang, they stumbled upon the crew's party space!

9:05 "Constance wants a taste" LMAO KID

9:18 "the inflation rate in Portugal is alarming" lmao kid the inflation rate *here* is alarming too

9:18 what money are they even going to gamble though?? Surely they're starting with pocket change

9:39 oh my gosh the chips 😂

10:23 the crew with those sly looks. These kids are about to wreck house LMAO

10:29 DEATH OR GLORY

11:11 not gonna lie I know almost nothing about gambling so this is a little over my head

11:34 sunglasses? Wow, he saw the cards from the reflection on his eyes, that's impressive

11:57 I had two reactions to reading "Enzo's pies & pastries":

1. Stranger Things date night with Hopper and Joyce 🥺

2. MOOCHO?????

12:09 okay it's kinda sick that number two blends in with the lemons so well

12:20 another interview? And was that SQ on stage???

12:27 it was not SQ 🙃

12:33 "we've been expecting you" well that's concerning

12:47 their wardrobe choices are just. Strange

13:07 I think I just gagged

13:24 two things:

1. Every time we cut to Milligan I think about how good he looks in general. Well kept in that cute suit. He just looks nice.

2. WORRIED DAD IS WORRIED

13:36 awwww Rhondaaaa

13:48 "I am not scared" you fooled me 😂

13:57 "is a gold bar scared in Fort Knox?" ROLL CREDITS! Kind of!

14:09 and the dam breaks 🥺 the pain and mutual understanding from both of them makes this a perfect opportunity to open up

14:20 "but I'm learning that worrying is not a form of preparation" I need that tattooed on the backs of my eyelids, maybe then I wouldnt worry so much

14:31 awwwww 🥺🥺

14:49 damn 😂 the captain is becoming his own character at this rate

15:14 ....are they about to maintenance the ship?

15:27 LMAO STICKY

15:49 Sticky out here playing 5D chess

16:08 he's totally right, keeping track of the cards isnt cheating. It's just smart 😂

16:25 LMAO KATE WTFFF

16:52 you know, as much as they're talking about winning money, all they have is the chips. They need to cash out

17:08 Reynie, my love, I know you're trying to make a moral choice but in the long run that's pretty stupid. Also Sticky didnt cheat lol

17:25 they're innocent victims and so are Mr B and Number Two. The kids dont know this, but so are most of the acolytes

17:43 okay fair

17:56 yeahhhh idk how they thought the crew would take this

18:25 LMAO KATE

18:34 what the fuck was that Reynie 😂😂

18:48 yeaaaaahh that's kinda what I expected

19:15 wooow. Okay, not what I expected

19:29 why do I feel like the other boot is going to drop

19:40 wait huh? Did the guy just give them cash?

19:50 LMAO at least they have actual money instead of just chips

19:57 "you're an insult to real water polo players everywhere" KATE HAHAHA I bet she's been waiting to say that

20:23 "everything has an end, only a sausage has two" is that an actual German saying, can anyone confirm

20:33 ayooo this is the actual perfect time for Cannonball to find them

20:42 poor guy 😂😂

21:02 and there it is

21:27 STOP MR B'S FACE IS SO FUCKING FUNNY

21:52 HIS FACE LMAOOO. Apparently they clap at everything

22:20 "you have no idea who my parents are, do you?" He doesnt and neither does anyone else, so I'm all ears

22:40 I cant tell what's true and what's bullshit with her 😂😂

23:13 "the raw, terrifying beauty of nature's power" NOT HELPFUL CAP

23:19 oh shit. They're not making it to Lisbon, are they?

23:33 whooooa. So not only are they making an emergency landing, they're tossing everyone's stuff. RIP

23:53 the kids have officially met Captain Noland!! I've been waiting for this

23:59 "like rats." I dont like how he said that 😬

24:40 damn, are they about to bargain their maintenance services to dodge maritime court?

25:06 hey, play your cards. Cant hurt to try

25:22 "get us to Lisbon on time, and you go free" daaaaamn. Captain Noland is putting a lot of faith in them, considering this job means so much to him

25:35 the fruit 😂😂

25:50 what happened to "I moved on" hmmm? Hmmmmmm? 🧐 bitch

25:57 whoooa I did NOT like the shifting of his eyes over to Mr B. Super subtle but incredibly effective

26:16 fucking weirdo. Bye

26:36 LMAO IS SHE BUSTING HERSELF OUT IN THE PIE TRUCK

26:52 NICE

26:57 oh good grief they had to do this at night too. Get ready for a jump scare

27:21 daaaamn. Weird, eery.. I guess we'll find out what's going on later?

27:34 eughhh.

27:35 ugh he's doing the thing again with the rods and cones bs

27:47 okay I dont like that mr b is listening like that. Please dont get got

27:49 NO DONT LOOK AT HIM DONT DO IT EUGHGGJ

28:01 NOOO. NOOOOOOOO

28:12 oh shit they got there on time!! Cap looks good in the cap

28:16 OOOH THEY GOT THERE EARLY??? DANG!

28:24 one of those suitcases has the kids in it :) like for sure

28:47 ayyyy, there they are. That was smart!

28:50 awww the hand :) she's not going to accept but the gesture is there

29:00 god that was so sweet

29:04 AWWWW

29:16 AYYYY MARITIME JOB OFFERRRR

29:26 THE SALUTE

29:31 I'm sad to see him go, I want to know more about him!!

29:42 oh THATS why she stole fruit 😂

30:04 them 😂😂😂 give me that sibling dynamic

30:36 fair enough Kate LMAO

30:49 "Mr Benedict is not strong. he's a glass house held together by desperate optimism." Two things:

1. Standing tall and keeping yourself from crumbling when you're constantly in a state of self-sabotage seems like a form of strength to me. It takes so much to keep yourself going when it feels impossible to

2. Damn, she knows him really fucking well 😂

30:55 "that guy? Again?" I mean all of the passengers did have the same docking point, so yeah 😂

30:58 "must be hard to see" she knows he's jealous 🥺

31:08 omg did Sticky talk Reynie up??

31:11 OMG HE DIDDDDD

31:13 HIS BEST FRIEEEEND

31:26 AWWWWWWW

31:28 oh lord here we go again

31:37 this guy again! I dont remember his name

31:44 well yeah, that usually happens when someone's missing

31:48 ohhh I Dont Like that he's using their title, that shows respect for them, which means he's taking their threat seriously. Yikes.

32:04 yep. Yep. It's weird, and he's weird, and unfortunately, he's taking it seriously.

32:12 "I respect them deeply. Deeply enough to... treat them without mercy." BELGUHDOWHDHD EUGHH

32:19 ayyyy this is where the Portuguese on his name card comes into play!

32:21 dang he was really just in plain sight

32:26 I dont like that we cant see the driver

32:44 NO WHY IS HE SMILING DONT PROVE ME RIGHT

32:48 NOOO ITS OVER??? NOOOOOO

Okay I'm fucking shook??? You mean to tell me we have to wait a whole ass WEEK to find out what the hell's happening? Something something the driver works for Curtain, something something Number Two breaks out just to break back in, something something the adults have to improvise

Ahsjdjdjd 🥴 welp, time to scream and theorize. See y'all in discord, love you byeeee

[malevolentbooks]

23: Pitch

"Okay, so you know this game that's out there, it's called Final Fantastic Fourteen or something?"

"Fourteen? It has that many sequels and this is the first time you've told me about it?"

"They're not sequels. It's not a movie or book, it's a video game."

"Video game? Aren't they they competition?"

"Yes, but I think this one can be condensed into a movie that will win all those kids over."

"You do? Your pitch is that there is a video game that we can adapt into a movie? Do you even have a script? Do you remember how well the Thumb Reader franchise took off, even with a model playing Luna Crowfeet? It was a disaster!"

"I know, but this one is different. I found a prospect written by one of the kids that plays the game. They call it 'Fanfic' or some such thing, but it has everything that we want these days."

"And it will get their butts into seats in a theatre?"

"Absolutely! It's even off the older material, so everybody will be able to follow it!"

"Okay, show me what you've got. If I like it, it's your baby. If I don't, you'll never work again in this town!"

***

Working Title: The Many Loves of Tataru Taru

Scene: A generic dusty street with fantasy/sci-fi looking buildings.

Script follows:

***

Yda had been absolutely brutal in her evaluation of Papalymo’s lack of courage.  More importantly, she had been correct.  The last galled him more than the first.

Driven as much by shame as anger, he now stood at the door to the Waking Sands. He held a bouquet of expensive flowers as large as he was in one hand, and a box of chocolates in the other.  He was ready, finally ready, to reveal his love for dear Tataru.  

“Nothing can stand in my way this time!” He thought as he felt the blood rush to his…uh…head…and he contemplated the adoring look that would fill her eyes when they were finally able to acknowledge the simmering love the two of them had long held for each other despite her clever attempts to conceal her great ardor by barely addressing him by name and moreover refusing to approve much of his expense paperwork no matter how many copies he sent.

Papalymo noticed that his flowers had begun to sag a bit as his fist tightened and crushed the base of the stems.  He took a deep breath to relax and moved his grip slightly up the bundle, relieved that he had gone with the long-stemmed versions despite them being significantly more expensive.  With no additional flowers these must be protected, though in the event that the chocolates were not acceptable he did have an array of fruits and baked goods outside.

As he reached for the door handle his concentration was suddenly thrown off by the impact of a bullet hitting it.  

The door, not his hand.  

He spun quickly, unable to gesture in any meaningful magical way without dropping the flowers or chocolates, so instead he glared menacingly in the rough direction that he suspected the bullet may have come from.

“Going somewhere?” Wedge growled, as he raised his smoking pistol to point upwards, slowly lowering it onto his shoulder in a move that despite showing every sign of being just custom emote was still pretty cool.

Papalymo narrowed his eyes in a way that clearly communicated threat even to those who are not used to being threatened.  “It is none of your business where I am going, Blimp-boy.” He snarled, reaching for an insult where he had prepared nothing because…Wedge?  Really?

Wedge smiled a relaxed but still somehow forced smile as he realized that his pistol was currently unloaded and tried to wonder if he could get another cartridge into it before Papalymo was able to drop his flowers and chocolate and cast a spell while he at the same time tried not to let this wonder get in the way of making his conversation seem calm and relaxed.

“If it involves the lady Tataru then it is very much my business.” He growled between clenched teeth, doing his best to still make his enunciation clear since they’d both likely been deafened by the recent gunshot.  “Also” he said, unclenching his teeth to give the proper depth of explanation required, “Both the Tiny Bronco and the Enterprise are more semi-rigid airships rather than blimps, so the taxonomy of your insult is largely incorrect.”

Angry yet unwilling to casually dispose of his two courting burdens, Papalymo could only glare at his opponent as he inwardly stewed about having been shown wrong not just to his comedy-relief melee-centric partner, but to a minor character present only for highly expressive emote reactions and as fan service to an entirely different fandom about which he could have no inward understanding despite their huge overlap on the level of societal pursuers.

Wedge, understanding on some level that his status as a minor character put him at some disadvantage began to become gravely concerned that he was about to start a cut scene that would later be featured on the “Tragic Gaming NPC Deaths” YouTube channel felt the need to offer an initial compromise.  “Are…those the long-stemmed irises?” he stammered.

“Yesssss.” Papalymo responded sibilantly, appreciating that somebody had noticed but not quite sure where this particular conversational element had come from and wondering if this part of the conversation was just a side-effect of a hasty and uncorrected translation from the original Japanese-language script.  “I’d better not be in a cutscene.” He muttered to himself.

“Those must have been expensive.” Wedge considered out loud, noting his own lack of gifts of any sort.  “Who can afford long-stemmed irises on a minor NPC’s salary?” He mused inwardly.

“I know, right?” Papalymo answered in an uncharacteristic but expected and accepted fanfic response that would not be further referenced.  He did not address the comment stated inwardly since he did not see it and prided himself on not metagaming.

“I’ll tell you what.”  Wedge stated in a telling way.  “Why don’t you put the flowers and chocolate down on that big pile of fruit and baked goods beside you, and while you’re doing that I’ll reload so we can start even?”

Cognizant of what he had done to the flower stems earlier, and both heartened by and slightly miffed at the mention of his gift-giving excess, Papalymo nodded and the two of them frantically went about their separate activities.  He finished and summoned the elemental forces just as he noted Wedge levelling his now reloaded pistol his direction.

Before either of them could loose the destruction reined in by their fingertips another voice rose over the tense scene.

“Hold thy aim and suspend such puissant tumult as you both endeavor to inflict on one another.  Your duality is not the lone pursuant to the affections of the diminutive ingenue Lady Tataru!” a voice called out in diction as confusing as it was archaic.

Papalymo and Wedge both turned in in bafflement as Urianger stepped around a corner.  He started lowering his hood to aid the shock of recognition before realizing that he never did that as his speech patterns were unmistakable enough and instead fiddled with his ears in a casual way hoping that observers would simply see it as a graphical artifact of a modified emote or clipping error.    “T’were t’wixt between the t’wo of t’you” Urianger started before pausing to get his apostrophes under control, “ere would naught be ascertained less true ruination would be templatively transfixed upon your binary persons.”

Wedge and Papalymo shot each other a confused glance, both pulling out a dictionary to look up several of Urianger’s words.  The action paused briefly as Wedge walked over to show Papalymo one definition that still confounded him and appeared only in Wedge’s dictionary since as a minor NPC he was only able to afford a older, cheaper volume that treated archaic phrasing as if it were still current.  They resumed their adversarial stance after this consultation.

Their momentary truce over, Wedge and Papalymo both looked over to Urianger realizing they had no idea how threatened they should feel since at this point nobody knew what his class or job might be aside from “obscure”.  Their rumination was interrupted by the sudden arrival of a cooling breeze and the slow, echoing steps of yet another suitor’s arrival.

Thancred walked up the sidewalk with a cool Fonzarellian demeanor, pausing to pose in a way that set the other three already present aback.  “She’s mine, man.” he said, addressing the first person singular at nobody in particular, a grammatical variation that would have been concerning in any conversation that did not already involve Urianger.

A brief standoff ensued as all considered their next moves, then a storm of actions all at once.

A vast ball of fire erupted from Papalymo.  Wedge fired his pistol as fast as he could reload, and Thancred hurled an array of cutlery matched only in variety by its volume.  Urianger did…whatever it was he did when not committing heinous acts of language. 

The battle was interrupted by a female voice that cut through the ever-growing sea of testosterone.  “Don’t be so quick to claim her, boys!” Moenbryda cried as she charged around the corner.  “Her gender relationship options are still open at this point!”

“You’re not even in the story yet!” Thancred yelled at her, tossing yet more cutlery her way.

“Maybe not”, she countered laughing, her delightfully asymmetric hair being gently blown by Thancred’s cool breeze.  “But the fans love me and so will she!”  This brought a growl from Thancred who did not at all like anybody else getting milage off of his cool, never mind using it to court a girl he was after.  He responded with the usual rain of cutlery because…yeah…

Suddenly from nearby Lord Commander Amyeric’s voice could be heard laying claim to Tataru’s affections as he and a half-dozen other assorted and unrelated NPCs rounded the corner and joined the fight.  Magic and weapons flew all around.

Meanwhile, inside the Waking Sands, Minfilia dropped a dozen reams of papers on Tataru’s desk, smiling as she butt-wigglingly walked away to wherever she went when not in her office.  Tataru just sighed and watched her go, small emotive hearts circling her head, as she started on the latest set of paperwork that would keep her up for the third consecutive night.

***

"By all that's holy, I don't even know what most of this means! Who are all these people? What is going on?"

"See, that's the beauty of it, sir. We can pay the writer a pittance because she's already completed the work, and all these people will already know the characters, so we don't need to spend any time defining them. We just need to worry about what overpaid actor to hire for each role, and what the final poster looks like."

"Yeah? Great, I'm smelling money already. What do you think of Scarlet Johansson as that one girl's role?"

"Which girl's role, sir?"

"I don't care, pick one!"

"She's perfect for it! Brilliant casting!"

"Good, here's thirty million dollars! Get things moving. I'm seeing golden statues with this one!"

"I'm right with you sir. Just in time for summer blockbuster season, I'm sure!"

[pedanticat]

Legend of Korra Rewatch Thoughts Episode 1-3

I'm really enjoying Korra as the protagonist. I like how she both shares similarities with Aang such as both being very fun-loving and thrill-seeking protagonists with a strong sense of justice. But she also contrasts against him since whereas Aang didn't like violence, Korra loves kicking butt and is much more hot-headed. Yet while she may be hot-headed and reckless, she's also pretty clever and resourceful. I like the struggles being set up with her such as having to step up as the Avatar for Republic City along with unlocking air bending.

I LOVE the 1920s aesthetic they went for with Republic City from the giant blimps to the old-school style cars to even having gangsters as minor antagonists. The aesthetic actually makes me wish that the first season used gangsters and triads as the main antagonists instead of Amon (especially with how badly butchered they end up doing the Equalists storyline).

Speaking of which, while I'm still early into my rewatch, it is frustrating to know that the equalist storyline ends up being butchered the way it is because the concept is actually pretty interesting. I could buy the idea of benders viewing themselves as superior to non benders with that resulting in a lot of hostility and prejudice between the two groups.

I can tell that Makko and Bolin are supposed to be the Zuko and Sokka of the series but to mix results. Makko was pretty unlikable in his debut episode with how much of an ass he was to Korra for no real reason (seriously, Zuko was less of an ass even when he was a villain) but at least became more tolerable in episode 3 with it exemplifying how much he cares for his brother. Bolin on the other hand is a lot more likable. While he doesn't have Sokka's dry wit, he's still entertaining due to how energetic and cheerful he is.

You can tell they’re REALLY trying to set up the groundwork for Makkora early on between Korra and Makko not seeing eye to eye, how both stare off into the distance at the end of episode two at the other's home and all their moments in the third episode. Honestly, it probably couldn't have worked if they didn't bother adding in a bunch of unnecessary romance drama.

[zachsgamejournal]

COMPLETED: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Shredder's Revenge

This is what fun looks like.

We're going to talk about it: my past with TMNT. I grew up on this. Seriously, the first comic was released in 1984. That's when I was born. Though, honestly, I never read them. I did own all four turtles, their van, and their blimp. I dressed up as Donatello for my kindergarten showcase, and enjoyed all the movies from the 90's--including the musical tour: Coming Out of Their Shells.

But my favorite why to experience it was through video games.

I remember seeing the Arcade beat'em up at my local skating rink. It was four player and awesome. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle's II was available on the NES. My cousin had it and I regularly demanded we play it together. Unfortunately, at my young age, I could not hit A and B consistently enough to one-hit all the enemies and I struggled dodging dangers. Still, there was just something so approachable and fun about the experience. I loved the clever places they would hide foot soldiers and the environmental interaction. Also the skate board section was a blast.

I once rented Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 1 on NES and I did not care for it. So moving on.

I bought TMNT 3 for NES, it should be better because it's the next game. I really appreciate the change in environments (the turtles start at the beach). It was neat how A/B now performed really cool special moves, but frustrating that it cost life to do so. Anyway, it was a fun game but I struggled to get very far.

I then saw Turtles In Time in the arcade and got really excited. I loved the wackiness of it, like stepping on a loose board and getting smacked in the face by the other end, Looney Tunes style. I didn't play much of the arcade, but I think I rented the SNES version once. Maybe?

In 6th grade, I made a new friend who had TMNT 3 for NES. I asked to play it, for nostalgia's sake, fully expected defeat but we actually beat the game in one sitting. I was impressed with us, and felt closure.

Anyway, seeing Shredder's Revenge previews I got it. Pixel-Art games are totally in right now, and will probable be a sub-genre for years to come. We also seem to have a habit of accelerating how quickly we reboot nostalgia. I don't know why 2022 was deemed as a good time to make a sequel but here it is and they nailed it.

Obviously it's got pixel art: easy win. But it has modern level of production design. The environmet does not appear to repeat like the classic games and there are tons of unique animations for the enemies: such as eating a popsicle or posing as a fast food clerk. While almost all the levels take place in New York City, they each feel very unique. Like in the classic games, the foot soldiers all look the same except for their color and wielded weapon, which match. This gives an easy indication to the player what kind of attacks to prepare for. There's multiple hover-board sections that help break up the beat 'em up action and keep up the fun.

Speaking of the beat'em up: this is where the game evolvied from the original. The older games basically had an attack, special attack, and jump attack. But there's a bit more going on here: jump attacks as you rise, attacks in the air, and attacks as you fall allow for a variety of strategies when facing different enemies. And each enemy seems to have their own weakness. Like the Triceratops guys (yeah, there are triceratops guys), they'll use their horns repel aerial attacks with their horns, but are week to basic ground attacks. Other enemies need to attacked exclusively from the air. Figuring out how best to beat your foe is key.

The game is short, which is why I beat it. Had it been longer I wouldn't have committed. I bought Xbox GamePass and plan to remain a subscriber. I'm trying out the streaming and I was excited to see a 3 hour game available. At one point I did get stuck on a level. It had two bosses and the pizza (health refills) were poorly placed. It basically took me switching to a character that had more extra lives so that I could sacrifice a life or two. By the time I beat it, I had actually gotten pretty good at it, so I maybe didn't need to switch.

The characters each level up. It's interesting. This unlocks new moves, special moves, hit points, and extra lives. The last part is a bit weird. I had committed to using Donatello through the whole game (he's my favorite) but my kids demanded I try the others. Don was already at level 5 and then I started switching around. April was pretty fun to use! But then none of my characters had enough extra lives to fight the double boss level. I switched back to Donny and finished the game that way. It's a little sad that the lives limit the player's ability to switch things up. But it's pretty easy to replay levels, so one could grind if they were inclined. The level-select map feels a lot liek the overworld map of TMNT.

The story was near non-existent. Shredder was collecting the parts for Krang and then unleashed Krang. But then they took over the Statue of Liberty and turned it into the Statue of Tyranny. It was funny and fit the weird themes of the older games and cartoons.

Anyway, it was a fun way to spend the afternoon. I'm sure my kids will want to play at some point.

[szallejhscorner]

Hollow

How Long is Forever - Part 28

The Human Heart - Part 31

It is fine the way it is. He gave her an ultimatum, and she made her decision. At least she finally was able to decide for herself. And yet…

The moment tears start to stream down her reddened cheeks, Chishiya expects her to stumble into his arms and cling to him like she used to. He is sure she will apologize, like she often does even in situations where she can’t be blamed at all, and that she will try to convince him to go back to the caravan, but in the end she will wait at the game’s entrance for him to get out again like the stubborn woman she is. It is more than surprising when she simply steps into the rain, her hair and clothes completely soaked within a single moment.

Chishiya sighs, a noise that is drowned by the rain around him. It has barely stopped for days now, something that is more than unnerving to him. At least it turns out that the shop right next to him has a choice of umbrellas, and after rummaging through pink hearts and bright yellow smileys, Chishiya eventually finds one made out of plain and transparent plastic.

He would have taken any umbrella as long as it helped him stay dry in the rain, but he probably will never understand why people find it amusing to carry around childish umbrellas with colors so bright it even hurts the eye. The plain one is still ugly for sure, but its only purpose is to be useful anyway.

Heavy rain drops noisily cover the plastic above his head as Chishiya steps out into the open. He throws a quick glance towards the direction where the stubborn woman has left off, but she is nowhere to be seen.

Good. At least she was smart enough to not expect him to follow her, since the game is his priority now. The walk has been pleasant with the sun and the comfortable silence, but as soon as he had caught sight of the Diamonds blimp, Chishiya had directed them here with this end in mind.

Why has she been so surprised after all? They had been brought here into this world to play games, and Chishiya is clever enough to clear all of them with ease. He is not afraid to die in one of them the slightest, and even if he does – what difference would that make?

For a long time, he wasn’t exactly eager to return to the real world. Though there might be a reason now, it is not enough to keep him away from proving his intelligence to the rest of this cruel and very interesting world.

But it’s alright. She has never been able to stay away from him that long anyway, and Chishiya is sure that she’ll wait inside the caravan once he has cleared the Jack of Diamonds. At least she is smart enough to find the way back to the caravan on her own, and he sighs at the thought of her ramblings that are certainly to come. That he’s a jackass, that he has been rude and apathetic, and that she’s waiting for his apology. Which Chishiya won’t give, since he was not wrong in the first place, but eventually she will kiss him and say that she loves him.

She has said that so many times now – in the nights shortly before she fell asleep, and as soon as she woke up in the morning, sometimes after just staring at him for minutes. It was annoying at first but soon became a part of their daily routine, and Chishiya has to admit to himself with shaking head that he ends up enjoying the sound of those words coming out of her mouth.

No, there is no way she’d just leave like that. She will come back to get things straight, but maybe she will take her time so he can enjoy a bit of silence before she returns to the caravan.

Chishiya likes to be alone, after all. This is exactly what he has missed during his time at the Beach, and he has never known anything different since his childhood. He has always been on his own and found strength in it. This hollowness has been a huge part of him as far as he can remember; why does it feel so cold now? Has there always been the slight ache inside his chest?

The fact that he feels troubled by something that has made the footing of his being for the most part of his life is kind of disturbing, and the entrance to the Jack of Diamonds is a welcomed distraction. This game won’t leave Chishiya time to think about her or what changes happened to him during the last weeks in general.

What a pleasant surprise that the game turns out to be Mahjongg. Only the player with the highest points will leave the building alive, and even after the first couple of rounds, Chishiya already has gathered way more points than the Jack himself. He has noticed at the very beginning that the floor is parted into four equal sections, with four doors leading to a possible exit, and as soon as the game ends, three of those sections will give way, causing the players seated on them to fall to death. What a well-thought construct!

The other two players don’t stand a single chance against the Jack, but it doesn’t matter. Chishiya wouldn’t have needed those two; their sweaty faces and fearful chatter is nothing but annoying. The Jack, not trying to hide himself among the players like Hibiki or the King of Hearts, stays calm and quiet most of the time.

His moves promise to be challenging, and while Chishiya analyses his strategies, the Jack does exactly the same with him. And with gambling such as Mahjongg, it doesn’t suffice to be intelligent only. There is always a part that can’t be foreseen or influenced, but that’s what makes a game exciting at last.

Only that in the end, it turns out the Jack is not too interesting at all. He misses several possibilities to clear the game for himself, and Chishiya manages to fool him with ease, never taking his eyes off the Jack with a smirk on his lips, as he watches how his opponent’s face turns darker with every draw.

In the final round, the once composed figure of the Jack has turned into a pale and distorted grimace, spitting over the table while he shouts at the player to his right, who has just called a Kokushi-Musou although there is no way he could still take over the first place.

THE GAME HAS ENDED. THOSE BELOW 1ST PLACE: GAME OVER!

The sections of the floor open up almost noiselessly, and together with the desperate screams of the players slowly descending into the pitch-black abyss, Chishiya can hear a last cry of the Jack:

“Just how far does your luck goooo!”

That  last word is drawn-out and fades quickly as the Jack won’t seem to stop falling, but finally the screams are gone.

TO THE 1st POSITION: GAME CLEAR.

Silence falls down onto the room, only disturbed by the clacking of Majhongg tiles in Chishiya’s hand. A gust of cold air emerges from the abyss as he inspects the tiles of the Jack, finding out that the citizen would have won easily if he had just taken a risk.

But that man seems to have chosen the safe and rational way, which has been enough to seal his fate. Gaming won’t work properly without taking a risk, and who is able to do that better than someone who doesn’t cling to life at all?

Chishiya has made bets with lives several times now, sometimes they were lost, sometimes not. Funnily enough, he always seems to survive when the bet is his very own life, most likely because he is not afraid about what will happen if he doesn’t end up that lucky anymore. With no true purpose, death is just another part of the way he has to go, and up to this day, Chishiya has never been scared to step onto that part since it will put an end to the hollowness filling him.

And while death doesn’t seem to be the only option to do that anymore, it remains an option notwithstanding.

The whole game started to be so promising, and yet Chishiya has not been able to find anyone truly interesting inside. But another game is still waiting for him, and not only the game – a certain citizen inside there as well.

What a surprise it has been to see his face on the podcast! Such a minor detail that almost everyone else probably has missed, while people were focused on Mira alone. Shapes of other figures, subtly hidden from the human eye’s focus, but Chishiya has seen them. Other citizens, waiting to defeat them in the new games of the second stage – and one of those figures has been very familiar. He will be interesting for sure.

Chishiya doesn’t need to see the last Diamond’s blimp to know where it is. Grabbing the plastic umbrella from the entrance, he heads towards the shopping mall where he and that oh so stubborn woman had been chased by the King of Spades, but instead of turning right towards the Hearts game, Chishiya turns left where the blimp is withstanding the rain.

It leads him to the Supreme Court, a richly ornamented building if one ignores the broken windows and crumbling facades, and the King could not have chosen a building better than this.

Three people have already gathered in front of it when Chishiya arrives: a woman with a side-cut and barely any clothes on except a jacket and knee-high leather boots, not bothering the rain even the slightest; a man wearing a fancy suit and keeping himself dry with a white umbrella, and a hunched creature that resembles more a failed experiment than a human being, but at least it’s wearing a rain coat.

It is the woman stopping Chishiya mid-way with her hand stretched out. “Wait! Real quick!” The arrogance in her voice resembles the look in her eyes, and Chishiya can’t imagine how this one would be intelligent enough to face the King. “You, what do you do? What can you do? Math? Memorization? We’re heading for the top of the intellectuals. The King of Diamonds! We don’t want any meatheads, okay?”

As far as I can judge, I am the only one who is not a meathead around here. There are plenty of ways Chishiya could prove that he is better than any of them, but he doesn’t want to waste time on such childish shenanigans. He manages a smile, putting the same arrogance and condescendence in it, and hums while the rain won’t stop to cascade down onto his umbrella. “Well, just now, I cleared the Jack of Diamonds – I guess?”

“Ha? What? Crappy followup,” the woman spits out, but Frankenstein’s monster emits a cackling chuckle. “He’s got credentials… and he came here in the rain. Let’s go.”

They enter the dark building of the court and emerge the stairs, creaking under every step despite their noble-looking appearance. So much money has been put into the gallant appearance of this place, and yet it takes a mere scratch on the surface to reveal the cheap truth inside. Just like humans themselves.

It leads them into a round chamber with five tables and five seats arranged in a circle, only that one of the seats is already taken. Even though it’s not surprising that Chishiya was right with his assumption, he doesn’t try to hide the satisfaction in his voice upon seeing the familiar figure.

“I knew it. It’s you, former Beach number 2 – Kuzuryuu.”

The former member of the executives back on the Beach sits there completely motionless, arms rested on the elbows and hands folded as if praying. His eyes are hard to be seen through the mirroring glasses, but he seems as immaculate and untouchable as always.

Chishiya ignores the confused looks and shouts of the other players – the man opposite to him is the only person of interest in this room, except for himself. But now that the King doesn’t have to hide his true nature anymore, there is not even a single world of welcome for an old friend.

“That’s such a cold face for someone who’s come so far to meet you. So take it, you don’t feel like chatting?”

Kuzuruyuu’s voice is as cold as his face when he finally speaks up. “You all have come here for the game, right? Let’s begin.”

Such a rude man, not even answering his question, Chishiya thinks with a smirk. Though it does not seem to be anything personal; the King avoids all questions and statements from the other players as well while he summons them to take a seat and shackle their knuckles.

It has been a surprise to see someone working so close with Hatter reveal himself as the true enemy, even more with the rumors that citizens were once normal players but got to decide if they wanted permanent residency. What a shame that it is so hard to gather sufficient information about their life here, and Chishiya has hoped to find more answers inside this room.

What made Kuzuryuu choose to become the King? What was the reason behind his infiltration at the Beach?

The King refuses to talk about that matter too deeply for now, but maybe he will as soon as the other players are gone. Once the shackles are closed, the rules of the game are explained, and it is finally the challenge Chishiya has been looking for all the time.

All players are to select a number, and the player whose number is closest to 4/5 of the average taken of all player’s numbers will be the winner of that round. One point will be subtracted from the other players, and once a player has reached -10 points, it equals death. On top of that, another rule will be added to the game every time a player dies, and except for the first round, only one minute of time is given to decide a number.

This is exactly why Chishiya needs to keep his mind clear from distracting thoughts, and it is his chance to prove that he is clever – more clever even than the King of Diamonds himself. It is good that he brought her to the King of Hearts though; not only because this game allows one person only to survive, but she would have never been able to keep up with the intellect of the other players.

While the others start to think of tactics and strategies, Chishiya can’t help but to acknowledge the cleverness behind the game. Not only does one have to make out what number the others will guess – the task is to find out what guesses the others will take about you and how that will inflict their number, still including the fact that they know the others will try to see through their thoughts as well. It might seem unpredictable at first, but the situation is equal for everyone. And with the King having only a 20% chance of winning…

The first round is won by the King, and it turns out that a certain amount of highly concentrated acid is poured into scales hanging above their heads for the losers, and with the tenth point, the scale will most likely pour its content over the player sitting right under it. What a cruel and fascinating death.

With the next few rounds, the numbers chosen by the players decrease more and more, and every time, the King takes the win. As the acid pours into the scale over Chishiya’s head, he watches the slightly panicked reactions of the others with a chuckle. He has expected to lose the first three to four battles until the game would reach a certain point, and that point has come now.

As the numbers chosen by everyone became lower witch each round, it is now that point where everyone will chose 0. The average will be 0 as well, and everyone will emerge as the winner. The game will continue forever like that, unless…

“I’ve got it. I finally understand what you’re trying to weigh.” There is no reaction to his words, but Chishiya doesn’t need one anyway. Maybe it is because he has worked together with Kuzuryuu before, maybe it is just because the others can’t stand up against him when it comes to intelligence. But a very important point, one that is missed by at least the other male players, is that being clever does not have to resemble flawless calculations. It resembles the ability to see through the bigger picture, and once again it proves to be a high advantage that Chishiya is not afraid of the acid hissing above his head. Death will be painful for sure, but it won’t last long.

And with taking that risk, Chishiya chooses the 100. It is against all rationality, and he does not have the slightest chance of winning like this, but it manipulates all calculations and predictions. And not only does it prevent the King from winning another round, but Chishiya is sure that at least one other person inside this room will get what he’s up to.

As soon as the results of the sixth round are revealed, his thoughts are confirmed. This time, it is the barely dressed woman choosing the 100, giving the point to Chishiya, who has chosen 25 and thus is as close to the calculated result as no one else.

There is no way in winning the game if everyone only tries to win every single round, but sacrifices are needed to commence. He did that himself by choosing the 100, and the woman next to him continued that thought. Making a sacrifice in the face of such extreme conditions, with the scales above their heads…

That’s the purpose behind that game. To weigh the value of life. But is any life worth being weighed? Is life so sacred and beautiful that it deserves such treatment?

Two of the players finally reach -10 points at the same time: the monstrous looking creature and the one wearing his fancy suit. Though it doesn’t remain fancy for long as the acid is poured down at their heads, eating into flesh and cloth all the same. Their screams are annoyingly loud, and Chishiya scrunches his nose at the stench of the burnt away flesh, but soon enough he smirks towards two piles of black mass that don’t resemble a human life any longer.

With two more rules added to the game and a sudden silence falling onto the room, Chishiya once more tries to make the King talk a bit. “Why did you become a Borderland citizen?” Since he is sure all citizens have once been players as well, it means they had to go through the same stages of playing games against the Dealers and clearing the face cards. They all are the same, with the only difference being that the players have to renew their visa while citizens are granted freedom in this world.

And finally, Kuzuryuu answers. Giving multiple examples of how cruel the world can be, of people dying because they can’t afford commodities that should be free to everyone, and how most systems simply continue to protect the wealthy and cruel.

“I lost my understanding of the worth of a life.”

Nothing of this is new to Chishiya. He has seen such cruelty himself, has faced the dark side of the world many times as a child, but the difference to the lawyer sitting opposite to him is that he doesn’t care.

“I see. You’re gentle… And your high intelligence plagues you.” Chishiya doesn’t care if a child dies because it can’t get vaccinated, or if someone dies in a country on the other side of the world. Why should he care when no one cared for him? Why struggle with such thoughts if it won’t help anyone anyway?

Some lives just don’t have value. And as he looks up to the board, noticing that there is only one point left for him to be eliminated, it becomes clear to him once more that his life is just one of them.

People might even say he doesn’t deserve to live, and yet he survives again and again, round after round. It is once again the combination of rational thinking and luck that grants him the win in the next round, and another life is sacrificed in exchange for his own. Not worth the cost, and yet it happens.

Chishiya wonders if he could chose to become a citizen after this game. Will the emptiness inside of him vanish completely if he starts to run death games until he is defeated by other players just like him? Will it become easier once he loses the human emotions that he seems able to feel – or would it only increase the pain inside his chest?

But then again… Does he want to lose them? Does he want to lose… her?

At least Kuzuryuu allows himself to talk freely, now that all other players are eliminated. And it quickly turns out that they’re both torn – Chishiya about his own emotions, and the King about the fact that he still doesn’t know how life should be valued and how all humans could be treated equally. He had hoped to find out with this game, but the answer remains hidden while it should be more than obvious.

The fact is that it’s impossible to achieve equality. There will always those who can be saved by the sacrifice of others, and even the greatest and most altruistic world would somewhen end up standing in front of a decision that requires a sacrifice. And as soon as this point is reached, the equality will shift to an uneven distribution of power. So why care in the first place?

That’s not all though. Since Kuzuryuu is highly intelligent as well, he must have come to that conclusion himself long ago. And without finding a proper answer, he has seen himself unable to return to the normal world, and hoped that the games themselves would help him to decide.

What an immature thought. By trying to decide over the value of human life, he has been more trying to become a god over all people than a fair judge. And yet he is not able to make a conclusion. What a sad King he is.

Slowly growing tired of this conversation, Chishiya decides to lay his life into the hands of this judge. He does not value his life, so why not let the King decide about that?

Two times he turns the tablet so Kuzuryuu can see his number, and two times the King chooses his own failure without losing many words. The third time Chishiya does that, the King is not able to hide the delicate drops of sweat on his forehead any longer. By taking the risk of throwing his life away, Chishiya has managed to get him into a dead-end, but he makes his final decision after all.

No number is displayed for Kuzuryuu once the results are shown, which can only mean that he pressed two numbers at the same time. Not being able to make a final decision until the very end. How pathetic. And yet he appears completely calm in expectation of death.

“I see… So you decided that you can’t decide the worth of a life. What happened to your normal expression? Your face looks like you’d rather die than to live with giving up on your ideals.”

None of them cares about the announcement that the King has reached -10 points. “If that’s the case, then I finally was able to decide how to live my life. Thanks to you.”

Those last words come unexpected, leaving no time for further questions as the acid turns Kuzuryuu into a black mass of dead flesh. And yet it doesn’t feel like a victory to Chishiya, since he is not the one who finally understood what his life was worth. Just as if the King ran away with the true victory. Is he… envious?

As the blimp outside bursts into flames and burning pieces falling to the ground, Chishiya decides to finally leave the court and return home. Other than expected, he doesn’t feel satisfied by the challenge of mind at all. In fact, the current events leave him… thoughtful.

How could someone else put his life over their own? Why him, out of any? What did Kuzuryuu see in him that Chishiya can’t make out?

Since the sky is still covered in thick dark clouds and rain continues to fall down, it is hard to make out what time it is exactly. Night has to fall soon, and when Chishiya reaches the caravan, it is not lit up as he expected.

In fact, his stubborn woman didn’t return at all.

Everything is still the way they have left it in the morning, with both cups still on the table and breakfast remains covering the sink. During the games, Chishiya did not waste too many thoughts on her. He has been sure that she’d return here, change into dry clothes and wait for him so she could start complaining about his behavior. He has been wrong, it seems.

Where is she?

Chishiya frowns at the thought suddenly crossing his mind. It is not impossible that the King of Spades finally managed to kill her and that her body is still lying somewhere in the empty streets, her blood mixing with the rain that does not want to stop. She has escaped death multiple times now, but that does not mean she is safe from it.

He should not care about that at all. If she’s dead, she’s dead, and there is nothing he can do. Nothing he should do, other than continue what he has been doing. But most of the things he did these last days had something to do with her.

There is still a chance that she is not dead yet. There are more players after all, she probably just found shelter with one of them. It might sound cruel to others, but Chishiya could handle her death better than that. A dead person can’t come back no matter what. If she is still breathing, she could return… or not. And there’s barely a way to find out.

Searching for her is no good as well, since it will soon turn too dark to see anything, even more so with the rain. And yet the chance remains that she will return on her own.

 She doesn’t. Chishiya eventually reaches a point where his body refuses to take in another cup of tea and screams for sleep, and he gives in to the demands. But he doesn’t seem able to find much sleep during the night. Something is missing – the warmth next to him, the sounds of her body shuffling now and then in the middle of sleep.

At one point, he turns around and rests his hand on the cold pillow next to him. Everything about it feels wrong. Just how could he get used to all that within a mere couple of days? This is everything he has known and wanted for a very long time, why won’t he find any rest then?

And every once in a while, Chishiya will see an image of her dead body lying in the rain. What sense of irony if the King really managed to kill her.

Night fades and morning comes, and with it a cloudy sky and only a few rays of sunshine finding their ways into the caravan’s windows. But it has lost every right to be called a home. Not… without her.

It is not the first sleepless night, and not the first morning without breakfast. Both makes him feel uncomfortable, but at least it is something he is used to. When he leaves the caravan, he does so without a clear end in mind, except that he wants to search the area for… for what? A body, a trace?

The umbrella scarcely shelters him from the rain now, as the wind will carry the cold drops of water into his hair and clothes anyway. He walks along the path near the river, passes the shopping mall and the Jack of Diamonds, only that the blimp is now scattered on the ground in pieces. There is nothing – no corpse, no blood, no signs of gunshots. Not even another player.

What a stupid idea to search for her anyway. The Borderlands are small compared to the real Tokyo, but how is one supposed to find another person, even more so if that person does not want to be found?

Chishiya doesn’t like it, but he has to consider the possibility that she left for good. That she won’t return to demand her hugs and kisses. This thought increases the pain inside his chest drastically, but it will soon all be eaten away by the emptiness filling him. Like it always does.

An unexpected and heavy gust of wind blows away the umbrella in a moment of abstraction, exposing Chishiya to the rain without a shelter nearby. He ends up climbing on top of an old minivan, as if he’d wait for something – or someone. Which is pathetic, of course. He does not wait for her to find him. She chose to leave, and thus it will be.

The rain runs into his eyes, pours down his spine. He lifts his face into the storm, exhaling a long sigh while he turns around a gun in his hands. He has found the weapon inside the van, and it can never be bad to come prepared. “What should I do now… I wonder why I really feel like talking with somebody…?”

His voice is drowned by the wind, and of course there does not come an answer. Not that he expected one, anyway. Minutes pass, maybe hours – hard to tell with clouds covering the sun. Another blimp falls down in the distance, but Chishiya can’t see which one it is.

The minibus becomes uncomfortable after sitting on top of it motionless for so long, and Chishiya jumps down and continues his walk without destination. Past the cars, across a bridge, until he just follows a street, waiting for it to lead him anywhere.

With his eyes mostly glued to the ground and the rain drowning most of the sounds around him, it takes Chishiya quite long to realize that another figure is approaching him. The moment he looks up, he is sure to see the familiar face he has been searching for, but it turns out to be someone completely more unexpected.

His hair seems to be even more unkempt than usual, and he looks incredibly tired judging by the rings under his eyes. Surprising is only the rifle resting on the back of the usually quite peaceful man, but it is almost as if Arisu is the exact reflection of himself. Troubled, hollow. Tired.

“Yo.” Chishiya is the one to open his mouth first, not sure how the dark-haired man will react to seeing the one who has put him into so much trouble. Not that Chishiya regrets what happened to Arisu because of him. Arisu had been his bet for stealing the cards – a bet that he sacrificed. And yet he is here, mostly unharmed, because he is clever as well. Clever enough to survive.

Arisu’s eyes grow big while he lifts his head, as if he didn’t realize there was someone standing in front of him until Chishiya spoke. “Chishiya?”

“Since it was you, I knew you’d still be alive. Ever since the Beach…”

The chuckle Arisu spits out is dry and almost sad. “That’s right… You put me through hell back there. Being battered by Aguni’s men and waiting for my visa to run out while I was being shackled on that chair…”

”So that’s what happened. Are you still angry?” Not that it would matter much now anyway, but Arisu once more proves to be incredibly selfless. Chishiya has never been able to understand how one could think so much about others before even considering themselves, and somehow it seems that Arisu and Kuzuryuu have a lot in common without even knowing.

“No…” The boy’s voice sounds tired, as if he just wants to lie down and sleep for a century before waking up again. “Well, maybe I should say I’m not in the right state of mind for that right now.”

“I… see…”

Is it just an imagination caused by hunger and lack of sleep, or does talking to Arisu actually ease the pain inside his chest? “For some reason, this is calming… Being able to talk with someone I know…To be able to meet you again makes me happy.”

And he means it. After all, what he has been looking forward to was to talk to her, let her rant about his indifference to the rest of the world, but also to talk about the King of Diamonds. About the sacrifices, the value of lives and how it just wouldn’t leave his mind.

Arisu even manages a smile, the same weak and sorrowful smile that Chishiya is showing now. “You’ve somehow changed.”

This is something Chishiya would have not liked to hear, but it is true. He is also completely aware of what exactly changed him. He wonders how he would have gone through the second stage if she didn’t choose to go with him. Would Kuzuryuu’s words still have been able to touch something inside of him? Or would he have been apathetic to them all, continuing to live that senseless, wasted life?

What is it – the power held by this woman, able to change him to what he is now? Maybe he will be able to find the answer if he talks to his opposite, who has been way better with other people anyway.

“Arisu, will you listen to something I’ve never told anyone before?”

The boy nods, hesitantly at first, and waits for Chishiya to continue whatever it is that he has to say. Only that he does not know how to begin. For the first time in his life, he is not able to find the right words.

“I…”

That’s when Chishiya hears a gunshot, and every part of his body explodes into a single mass of pain and his vision goes dark.

[strawbunniiee]

A Girl and a Ghost Ch. 2: Wandering the Trails

YAAYYYY I FINALLY GOT MY LAZY BUTT TO POST THIS

anyways, as promised i finally wrote a second chapter! i hope you enjoy it :)

@salamifuposey @monsterbride99 just lettin y’all know this exists sjjddkfkd srry for taggin yall so much hope u dont mind aa

It had been a few weeks after Jawaii had met Phantom, and she began to see him regularly. After her meeting with him, Phantom had secretly slipped a note in her pocket that had the lyrics of a special song. If she were to sing said song, he would arrive.

Some mornings, Jawaii would wake up feeling as if befriending Phantom was all a dream. Like it never even happened, it was all in her own mind. But alas it was not, luckily for her. They would explore the town and forests and just generally have fun with eachother.

Jawaii was discovering so many new feelings... feelings she had never really felt before finally having a best friend. Each one was just as wonderful than the last.

One morning, Jawaii ran to the forest, summoned Phantom and they began to talk about what they wanted to do for the day.

"So what do you wanna do today?" Jawaii asked eagerly.

"Hmm, I'm not entirely sure... but perhaps I could show you my homeland?" Phantom suggested.

"Ooh! What's your homeland like? I bet it's cool!"

"It's quite creepy, I'll admit, but it does have a nice atmosphere."

"AWESOME! Can you take me? Pleaaaase?" begged Jawaii.

Phantom chuckled. "Of course! Now stay close, I don't want you getting lost."

And so, they were on their way to Spooky Trails, Phantom's home. Jawaii kept constantly pestering Phantom on the way, asking if they were there yet. When they arrived, it was indeed quite a creepy place, but of course Jawaii didn't mind.

"Wow... so this is your home? You like, actually live here?" asked Jawaii.

"Indeed it is! Hopefully it doesn't creep you out too much though..." replied Phantom.

"Dude, are you kidding? This is the most amazing place EVER!" she yelled.

Phantom was a bit startled by Jawaii suddenly yelling. "Quiet down, you'll disturb the spirits. They don't like being disturbed." the ghost gently reminded.

"Oh. Sorry spirit people. You guys are super cool though!" Jawaii began to skip ahead, with Phantom catching his breath trying to catch up to her.

"You're quite a brave young girl, I'll say. Not scared of Spooky Trails, ghosts in general... it's quite a surprise! I never knew there was a human who enjoyed our company and wanted to befriend us... let alone a child!"

"Duh, of course I'm not scared of you. You're amazing! And I bet all the other ghosts are just as wonderful as you are." said Jawaii.

"Aww, why thank you! However... it's quite rare that humans actually want us around, you see. They're either terrified of us, see us as an annoyance, or want us gone."

Jawaii began to realize how much she had in common with Phantom. She knew he had told her something similar the day they had met, but she never knew that he too was hunted down and wanted dead.

"...Me, my siblings and my dad are all wanted dead. Just because we're "evil". We barely even hurt anybody... I know my dad destroys planets for a living, and I guess that can be seen as bad, bu-"

"Jawaii, dear, apologies for interrupting of course, and I don't see you any different or anything, don't worry, but your father does what now?" Phantom had never heard of such a thing. Annihilating planets for a job! Who would do something like that?

"He destroys planets for a living. Besides, Dad tells me it's an important job, because if there's too many planets the galaxy could get overpopulated and it would be bad." explained Jawaii.

"Ah... fair point actually."

Eventually they made it to a large gate. It had bars shaped like musical notes and a dial shaped like a full moon.

"This is the Moon Gate, beyond it lies my stage, where I reside." said Phantom.

"You live on a stage? That's really cool!"

Phantom smiled. "It's sort of the only "house" I have. I'm glad you enjoy the concept though!"

Jawaii ran up to the gate and pushed it, pressing her entire mass against it trying to open it.

"Why won't it open?!" Jawaii growled, frustrated.

Phantom effortlessly pushed the gate open with his hand. "There you go!"

"...WHAT?!" Jawaii stood there, staring at him with her jaw dropped. "How strong even ARE you?"

The ghost rabbit laughed quite a bit. "I'm the only one who can open the Moon Gate when it isn't a full moon, I'm not THAT strong, of course."

"Ohhhh. That makes sense." replied Jawaii.

They walked up the pathway that lead to the stage. It was an absolutely massive stage, but also looked quite old. The curtains were a torn and tattered, and the wooden floor looked very scratched up. There were strange blocks scattered everywhere, with seemingly no purpose. The place definitely looked like it had seen better days.

However, Jawaii adored it and stared in awe and wonder at it.

"Your house is awesome, Phantom!" said Jawaii, running off to explore the place.

"Thank you, my dear friend! It certainly isn't much, but make yourself at home."

Jawaii climbed up and down the pipes, examined all of the spotlights, and she even poked around in the wires despite Phantom begging her not to. Needless to say, she would have nearly electrocuted herself if it wasn't for Phantom.

He introduced her to many of the Peek-a-Boos and Spooky Trails Rabbids who also resided here. She enjoyed talking to them, and yet again, it felt so nice to have people treating her as if she wasn't a threat, just a normal child. She could never get enough of that feeling. It was so wonderful to her.

About an hour later, Jawaii sat down in boredom.

"I'm bored now." Jawaii mumbled.

"Well, we have been here for quite some time, so I could see why. Would you perhaps like to go somewhere else in Spooky Trails?" asked Phantom.

Jawaii's eyes lit up. "There's more of this place? Heck yeah I wanna go!"

Her eagerness made Phantom smile. "Well then, let's head off shall we?"

They crossed a bridge over a rushing river (which Jawaii threw a stick into), passed by a few giant jack-o-lanterns and fed some hungry crows a bit of (probably very stale) bread that they found. Then they came to an enormous manor, which looked abandoned and loomed over the forest.

But Phantom was very uneasy about this mansion.

"J-Jawaii, let's explore this mansion a for just a minute and then we'll turn back, all right?" said Phantom, his voice shaking.

"Wait, what's up? Are you all right?" asked Jawaii, with concern.

"I'm fine. Just... look around for a bit and we REALLY must go back. Besides, y-you must be hungry after all of this, we should get a snack!"

"...All right, if you say so."

Jawaii wandered around the front yard of the mansion. She picked some flowers, examined some mushrooms (she tried to eat one), and threw stones against the wall of the mansion.

Phantom floated up to her as she was throwing the stones against the wall. "...We really need to get going,"

"But wh-" Just as Jawaii was about ask why, she accidentally threw a stone straight into a window in the mansion. There was a loud shatter and a horrifying shriek. Phantom immediately jumped in front of her, hiding her behind his large, round body. A big, spherical ghost with a crown emerged from the wall of the manor. He had piercing, glowing purple eyes with a cruel, furious stare. He had sharp teeth, which were bared in fury.

His crown's jewel had a massive crack in it.

Oh my God. thought Jawaii, immediately realizing how reckless she had been.

"FIRST YOU TURN MY TROOPS AGAINST ME, AND NOW YOU DESTROY MY CROWN?!" the ghost with the crown shrieked. "YOU'RE GOING TO PAY FOR THIS, YOU CRUEL, DISGUSTING FOOL. YOU'RE GOING TO REGRET EVERYTHING YOU HAVE DONE TO ME."

Phantom quivered in terror, not knowing what to do other than to hide Jawaii behind him.

He gained the courage to speak. "I never turned them against you. I made them realize how horrible you treated them. If anything, YOU'RE the cruel one."

Jawaii knew she had to do something too. She couldn't just stand here and let the only friend she had possibly be harmed, or far, far worse.

She went out from behind Phantom. "I destroyed your crown." Jawaii said, staring the crowned ghost in the eye.

"J-Jawaii, no...!"

"WHO IS THIS LITTLE BRAT?! AND WHO DOES SHE THINK SHE IS, GOING AND DOING THIS TO I, KING BOO, THE RULER OF THE UNDEAD?" King Boo screamed.

"If you must know, she is my friend. And she is not a brat, you demonic marshmallow." said Phantom, still quaking, but trying to be brave.

Phantom's insult just made the king even more angry.

"ANGRY MARSHMALLOW? LOOK WHO'S TALKING, YOU OVERINFLATED BLIMP OF A RABBIT!" he screeched.

Jawaii came a bit closer to King Boo. "HEY! Nobody insults my best friend like that, you ugly hag!"

"...What did you just call me, you little DIRT GOBLIN?"

"You heard me loud and clear."

Unable to come up with any witty comebacks or clever responses, King Boo angrily sputtered out, "ALL RIGHT YOU TWO PESTS, GET OUT OF HERE BEFORE YOU BOTH REGRET IT."

Without hesitation, Phantom picked Jawaii up off the ground and flew off with her.

King Boo angrily cursed under his breath and went back inside his mansion, plotting his revenge on the ghost Rabbid and the young alien.

[elexica]

Second Chance Christmas  {{ December 21 }}

Christmas tree shopping, ornament making, and decorating reveal some unresolved feelings...

The rest of the chapter after the break:

The door slammed open, clattering against the wall harshly.  Kaiba blinked in the bright light from the hallway, headache blooming at his forehead.

“Atticus wants you to come shopping for a Christmas tree.”  Joey announced, slamming a thermos of coffee and a small bottle of Tylenol on the side table.  The clattering noise was calibrated to exacerbate Kaiba’s hangover, and from the way his eyes squeezed shut, it worked.  “You left some stuff, I stuck it in the guest room closet, so help yourself.”

Joey tried to lower his voice as deeply as possible, make it sound as truly menacing as he could, but the follow up sentence, “Waffles are ready,” just didn’t sound very scary.

For his part, Kaiba just rubbed at his eyes.

When Kaiba rolled into the kitchen forty-five minutes later, he looked completely put together.  The picture of a man who could compartmentalize absolutely everything that had ever happened to him.

As he wandered toward the plate of waffles, Joey could feel the ghost of years past.  Of Seto wandering over, pecking a kiss to his cheek on his way to the coffee machine.

Instead he watched his ex-husband greet the kids and collect the plate set out for him at the counter.  Just the waffle and a bit of butter—no syrup, nothing sweet.  Kaiba sliced into the waffle surgically, and swallowed a small bite of it.  From the look on his face, he was too hungover and sick to really eat.

“Tell your Oto-san to eat his breakfast,” Joey said, pouring a glass of orange juice on the corner of the counter.

Kaiba sent Joey a death glare as Atticus announced that he had just the song.  As Atticus launched into the highly repetitive “Breakfast Song”—an independent composition—Kaiba winced as if he had taken a thousand life points of damage in a shadow game.

The thermos of coffee stayed in Kaiba’s hand as he wove through the driveway.  One of his cars had been left at the house—a black Mercedes that he had no real attachment to.  Kaiba must have tracked down the spare key from the hooks on the wall of the garage.  Kaiba was looking back towards the garage, as if he had a say in the matter.

Joey honked the horn of the minivan, startling his ex-husband and drawing another full body flinch from the man.

“I’m not movin’ Alexis’ car seat! Get in.”  Joey shouted out the window.  Kaiba revived his glare, only to lose it to a frustrated wince as Joey slammed on the horn again.

Kaiba froze, coffee “I swear,” Kaiba said, his voice menacing.  “She’s six, she doesn’t need a car seat.”

“Look, it’s a height thing now.  Ya can’t fire me, Kaiba, so unless ya got other plans, get in the car.”  He punctuated this demand with another ear-scorching honk.

Grasping at the last threads of his dignity, Kaiba straightened his back, schooled his face with as much focus as he could bear, and strode over to the minivan door.

Kaiba flung it open with a theatrical flair that would be more appropriate on a blimp than a minivan.

Joey opened his mouth to deliver an admittedly tepid comment—he was thinking “look who decided to join us”—but he was silenced by the kids cheering when Kaiba sat down in the car.

“Oto-san, can we listen to the Chipmunks Christmas?!” Atticus pleaded from the backseat.  

Joey didn’t bother holding back laughter and Kaiba clenched his jaw and nodded.

. . .

The adventure at the Christmas Tree farm started relatively smooth and uneventful.  Atticus and Alexis were good kids, even if Atticus could be a little loud and demanded a lot of attention, and Alexis was a bit shy.

For his part, Kaiba did an excellent job of standing and observing the process.  With stoicism, he posed at the back of the family and watched as Joey picked a tree, earned the approval of the kids, and tried to chop it down with the farm-provided axe on his own.

Tree chopping was harder than anticipated, and Joey’s struggles were equal parts frustrating and humiliating.

Kaiba couldn’t hold back a snicker, about 15 minutes into Joey’s battle with the tree.   But that was his miscalculation: the perfect opening for Joey to shoot back, “You think yer so strong, pretty boy?  Give it a go.”  And Joey all but tossed the axe in his ex’s direction.  Joey could have used a better, safer and more careful form when he handed his ex-husband the axe, but he was trying to catch his breath, and the haughty bastard had goaded him with that laugh.  Kaiba caught it easily anyway.

“Step back,” Seto announced, as if he was about to perform a magic trick.  The rest of the family formed a slightly more distant semi-circle.

Kaiba posed, axe high behind his back.  He made brief eye-contact with Joey before hefting a massive swing. The arc was long and graceful, and bit into the tree-bark savagely.  It took Joey’s four-inch indent and turned it into eight-inches, fully three-quarters of the way through the tree.

Kaiba smiled, pleased with his work.

“Alright,” Joey offered after a few seconds.  “Now, you pull it out.”  Joey resisted making any further innuendoes in front of the kids.

Kaiba nodded and reached for the axe.  It didn’t budge.  He adjusted his feet in the snow to gain more purchase—to no avail.  He lodged one foot against the tree, and still the leverage was insufficient.  It was as if the tree had accepted the axe as a new branch, and wouldn’t let go.

Kaiba pulled out his phone and started tapping.

“You lookin’ up how to get an axe out of a tree?” Joey challenged.

“No.”

“Oh my god are you trying to buy a better axe? And have it air dropped or something?”

Kaiba’s clever, snarky glance up from his phone told Joey exactly everything he didn’t need to know.  “Would the children have any interest in owning a Christmas tree farm?”

“No!” Joey jumped over, moving to try and steal back Kaiba’s phone before he could pull whatever insane business move required to buy out the family-owned farm.

Kaiba had been a capable “keep-away” player for decades, and hadn’t seemed to allow his skills to get rusty in the intervening period.

Joey still had some signature moves—and certainly could have brought the taller man to his knees if he had a yo-yo on him.

As it stood, the side tackle that Joey settled on was perfectly effective.  They rolled in the snow a bit, Kaiba able to twirl and pass the phone between his hands deftly and Joey ready to brute force the situation.  He had no qualms with getting snow in his ex-husband’s hair or up his nose.

What was surprising was when Kaiba stopped fighting.  He had been pinned down pretty well, back digging into snow, wrists held by Joey’s determined fingers as if handcuffed over his head, flakes stuck to his eyelashes and drenching his scarf.  Joey had one knee jamming Kaiba’s thighs into the ground.

Joey paused with those hands in his vice grip, feeling Kaiba’s muscles relax under his hands. The palms were facing him, and they were empty.  The only metal that Joey could see was the one thing he had longed to forget—Kaiba was still wearing his wedding ring.

“Is that?” Joey asked softly.

Kaiba had been baring a smug smile at Joey, confident in his plan to abscond with the phone—even in the compromised position.  That smile vanished at Joey’s question.

“I didn’t want to field any questions as to whether we were… I wanted it to be clear that we’re both their dads.”  Kaiba should have blushed, but he didn’t.  Instead he looked wild and scared, like he had been caught in a terrible lie.

Joey drew a slow breath, processing the information as the ice melted on Kaiba’s face.

“Oto-san!  I got the phone!” Atticus cheered, waving the slim black device in the air, instantly breaking the tension.

“Excellent execution,” Kaiba said, moving one powerful thigh to dislodge Joey’s entire hold.  He went tumbling back into the snow, and Kaiba stood up and straightened himself.  He held out his hand expectantly, and Atticus handed him the phone.

“How attached are you to this specific tree?” Kaiba asked Alexis, with the same intensity he would levy a question at a board meeting.

With the same seriousness that Kaiba had summoned, Alexis responded ,“I have no attachment to this tree.”

“Atticus?”

The boy shrugged.  Kaiba nodded.  “Then we will acquire another tree by alternative means.”  Kaiba tapped at the screen a few times.  “Any objections?”

This question was directed at Joey who also shrugged.  Joey eyed the axe, buried deep in the trunk of the tree.  It was not promising.

“What’s next on the holiday itinerary?” Kaiba asked, as if he was going to complete the Christmas activity list with the same ruthless efficiency he took to the business world.

“Decorating ornaments.”

. . .

It’s not just that it was fun to watch Kaiba struggle with things—though Joey thought it usually was—but his ex-husband, eyes narrowed in concentration, brows strung in frustration, long fingers dripping golden glitter glue…

Joey could have laughed the entire time.

Atticus had nicely decorated a music note.  He had diligently written the year and his name and his age on the thin piece of wood, and then doodled colorful lines around it.  Alexis had decorated a ballet slipper with surprisingly delicate shading and the same information.

Joey was relatively pleased with his own decoration: a nicely colored-in icon of the Time Wizard, with the same information.  He had hesitated to put his age, but it was tradition, and Alexis would surely bust him for breaking the rules.

But Kaiba had to be ambitious.  Usually his abilities could keep up with his formidable plans.  But this year’s image of the Thousand Dragon had not gone according to plan.  He had foolishly done the Blue Eyes White Dragon for the first year, and burned through it’s permutations by the time they finalized the divorce.

The underlying coloring wasn’t terrible—and the silhouette of a dragon was distinct enough that he couldn’t quite make it unrecognizable.  But the glitter glue gambit hadn’t paid off.  Instead of an extra level of pizazz, the glue had chemically interacted with the ink of the pens underneath.

Like a craft drawer Icarus that had flown too close to the sun, the careful coloring underneath melted into an absolute mess, blurring the relevant information, as well as the face of the dragon.  The whole work turned into a muddled, blotchy, glittering thing.  Yellows and marigolds combining to look more like a splotchy watercolor, but it lacked intention or grace.

Joey’s smile was wide and his jaw was clenched from the effort of not laughing at Kaiba’s very sad ornament.  “You can go back to the craft store and get a new blank one,” Joey managed to eek out, with only minimal giggles spilling into his speech.

“It’s…” Kaiba pushed at the glue with a sticky fingertip, as if he could reset the colors by sheer force of will.  “I will… write the information the back.”  Kaiba flipped the ugly ornament directly on the disposable plastic table cover, glitter glue oozing out.  He wrote his name in Japanese characters, and the date.

“It doesn’t look like a dragon, Oto-san,” Atticus protested.  “You have to try again!”

Kaiba nodded, and affixed two googly eyes to the head.

Joey completely lost it at the plain wooden outline of a dragon, wings stretched, blank except for the name, date, and age on it’s belly, glitter glue leaking from under it, as if wounded, and two plastic google eyes quivering as the table shook with his laughter.

Joey thought he spotted a soft smile on Kaiba’s face, but by the time he caught his breath again, it was gone.

. . .

Joey tried to push down the warmth in his chest that swelled when he saw Kaiba wrapped around the tree, diligently stringing holiday lights.  True to his word, he had an assistant from Kaiba Corp. USA’s New York branch sent out on an emergency hunt for the perfect tree.  Without much thought, by the time the family had made it home from the Upstate adventure and trip to the craft store, a tree was already staged in their house—perfectly conical and even.  As flawless as plastic, but full of that distinct pine scent.

Putting lights on the tree had been an intuitively “Kaiba” sort of activity.  He was taller, more electrically inclined, and better suited to the less nostalgic Christmas elements.  Although Joey had handled the task just fine, Kaiba’s persnickety nature did contribute to him spreading the lights evenly and nicely.  It was sort of frustrating for Joey to see the lights look so smooth and flawlessly distributed.  Especially when two years ago they had looked so uneven.

The off-year, when Kaiba had the kids for the winter holiday, Joey hadn’t bothered with any of his own decorations.  He had just visited his sister’s place, skyped with the kids, and moped.  He’d fallen asleep watching “Elf” alone on the couch.  It ranked high on his list of worst Christmases ever.  

Joey wondered a little, while Seto fought with the fragrant pine-needle branches, whether this would top the list of worst holidays.  Somehow, already, it didn’t feel like a bad holiday at all.

Joey held out a warm mug to Seto, once his task was finished.  It was one of the older ones, white with that navy-blue KC logo imprinted, but faded over the years.  

Kaiba raised his hand to reject the offering.  “I’m avoiding processed sugars. Last night was an exception, not the rule.”

Joey rolled his eyes.  “Trust me, if you’re going to sit through any of tonight’s concert, you’ll appreciate the… heh… innovation.”

With a skeptical look at the hot chocolate and half-melted marshmallows, Kaiba reluctantly accepted the mug.  He took a slow sip, before his eyebrows raised, recognizing the heroic volume of Baileys that had been surreptitiously mixed in.  Kaiba nodded in approval.  “I stand corrected.”

Indeed, the adulterated cocoa was fully drained over the course of Atticus’s hour long performance of every Christmas song he knew, plus a few piano remixes of various children’s show theme songs, and an original composition which was actually just smashing on the keys and smiling.

Kaiba remained steadfastly bound to the couch while Joey and Alexis actually placed all of the ornaments, whispering about what should go where.  A few times, Joey looked over, just to see if Kaiba had left.  Instead, he stayed, eyes darkened by some unknowable emotion.  When the concert was over, and Joey and Alexis’s task was finally complete, the three stepped back to turn off the overhead lights and bask in the eclectic glory of the tree.

Only then had Kaiba vanished.

. . .

Joey wandered into Kaiba’s study.  After the last night’s stunt, he expected to see the decanter open on the coffee table.

Instead, Kaiba was illuminated by his laptop, the rhythm of his typing on the keyboard sounding just a little like music.  “What do you want?” Kaiba asked, not looking up from his computer.

“I—” Joey shrugged, flopping down on the chair opposite Kaiba.  “I want to talk, I guess.”  

“About what?” Kaiba asked, though it didn’t quite come out like a question.  There was not a hint of curiosity in his voice.

“Us.”  Joey looked over at Kaiba.  “You’re wearing the ring, Kaiba.” Kaiba looked down at his own hand, as if he had forgotten that he’d put it on and failed to take it off.

“Yeah.  And we were outside: there’s no blizzard anymore, Kaiba.  It blew over last night.  I’m no meteorologist, but you’re definitely cleared to fly.”  Joey placed his hands on his hips, pleased with his own argument.

“The ring was unrelated,” Kaiba said, emotionless, glued to the computer screen.  Joey rolled his eyes.  “And the children have expressed that they’d like me to stay for the holiday.  If you will not allow me to, that is a different matter.”

“Of course you can stay, but we need to talk about us.  What’s going on here, Kaiba?”

“You’ve made it clear, enough times, that you don’t want me, not in the way that I want you,” Kaiba added, typing speed not diminished in the slightest.  “None of that has changed, like you said.  And so I don’t know why you are bothering me, now.”

Jou shifted slightly in his chair, his stomach tuning over.  Sitting next to Kaiba hadn’t given him this sort of anxiety for so long, maybe ever.  He was used to hot anger, coursing through his veins, pooling in his fists.  This uneasy détente felt simultaneously unsustainable and like the exact tar pit they’d been drowning in for the last three years.

“I don’t know that I meant that.  I mean, yeah, in the moment, I meant it.  But,” Joey leaned back, trying to reposition himself so that he might be more comfortable.  There didn’t seem to be any decent way to sit in his own damn chair.  “But it doesn’t mean, you really didn’t change at all.  A little.  Or that you couldn’t change… enough.”

Kaiba’s typing speed finally slowed, acquiescing to the intensity of the conversation.  Frankly, as Kaiba drew one hand to seal the lid of his laptop, Joey was willing to call that a change.  He hadn’t even had to literally ask Kaiba to stop working.  “Jounouchi.  Tell me what you want to hear.”

“Fine.” Joey straightened his shoulders.  “I want to know what happened when you went back to Domino.”

There was a long pause.

“I stayed on Mokuba’s couch for three months.” Kaiba crossed his arms defensively.

Joey burst out with warm laughter.  Kaiba didn’t blush, but he raised an eyebrow, as if to signal his ex-husband was not being the image of social grace.  Maybe he’d forgotten to whom he was married.

“And how’d he like that?” Joey said as his breathing steadied.

“He liked it fine.  He has always appreciated my cooking.  His fiancé did not.”

And like that, Joey was lost in another cacophony of giggles.  “Why didn’t you go back to the manor?”

Kaiba looked away, suddenly fascinated by the crystal decanter that had returned to the end table.  “It was… uncomfortable, after all this time.  After Mokuba’s partner made her opinion clear—”

“God, I can only imagine what the arguments were like,” Joey smiled again, bright as sunshine.

“It was not pleasant.  Obviously, my brother and I are still very close, but there were certain problems that arose—”

Joey leaned back in the chair, and balanced his feet on the coffee table.  To the untrained observer, it could have been mistaken for casual.  But all of the muscles of his legs were tense, the tendons that collided with the table strung like the strong of a bow.  “I bet I can guess: you show up at 2 am, you make whatever noise you’re gonna make with no regard for anyone sleeping, you sleep in all day after a couple of all-nighters unpredictably—”

“Yes,” Kaiba said, his voice somewhat soured.  “Everything that you hate about me, unsurprisingly was also loathsome to Yui.”

“That’s not… Kaiba its not things I hate about you,” Joey shifted again in the chair, picking at his nailbeds.  He looked as if he had been called into the principal’s office again after a fight.  “It’s shit that you do, that you choose to do, that’s disrespectful to the people around you.  I’m glad to hear that Yui didn’t take it.”

“After a time, you didn’t either, right?”  Kaiba responded, the sadness seeping in a little.  From the longing glance he shot at the whiskey, the allure of the crystal decanter was strong; the urge to not deal with his ex-husband in this mood, fully sober, was perhaps stronger.

But there was something about Joey’s words that seemed to put up a forcefield around the bottle.  “But it doesn’t mean, you really didn’t change at all.  A little.  Or that you couldn’t change… enough.”

Joey rolled his eyes, pressing fast-forward on the tired argument.  “That wasn’t all of it, and we both know that you know better.  But just tell me what else happened.”

Kaiba’s sour expression and defensive posture continued.  “After that, I got an apartment near the office.  I only used the manor in the Summer, when the children came to visit.”  Kaiba eyed that bottle once more.  “It was disconcerting to be there alone.  I thought… that this is what he must have… felt like.”

As if saying his name would have brought him into their life, awakened some other dormant form of him trapped between this world and the Hell he so surely belonged in.

They sat there, soaking in the ghosts of the past a little longer.  Joey wasn’t going to say anything to break the silence—he knew from experience that with enough stubbornness, Seto would eventually be forced to say something to change the subject or actually talk about his feelings.

After just a couple of minutes, Joey was proven right.

“Are you really happy working at the daycare?” Kaiba asked.

“How did you—” It was only natural that Kaiba would have Joey at a loss again.

“Yugi is a game developer, you know that he collaborates with Kaiba Corp.  We talk… sometimes,” Kaiba said, feigning nonchalance.  It was not persuasive.  Kaiba’s intensity for everything was too strong.  Joey was quite certain he’d never had a casual interest in his entire life.

“Yeah.  Things are good,” Joey answered the original question.

Kaiba nodded at the input and reopened the laptop.  The glare illuminated the wire framed lenses, hiding any expression within his eyes.  “I’m getting back to work.”

Joey considered putting up a fight.  But it had been a long enough day.  In a move reminiscent of his ex, he rose from his seat wordlessly and went his own way.

[magnificentcowboypeanutpaper]

Flynn Drabble

It’s short.  I haven’t picked up a pen in years.  Yes, I’m panicking about posting.  No, I’m not convinced I will keep it online for more than ten minutes.  But, it’s Garcy weekend so here goes. Angst ahead.

Had it started in Sao Paulo, in the dive selling bootleg liquor with impunity?  Or was it two weeks earlier with cough like shots and enough blood to drown in?  Maybe it was the first time he came across the name Rittenhouse and so carelessly recorded it for anyone to find?

Whichever it was, Garcia Flynn was too drunk to know or care.  What he knew without thought was it all revolved around one woman. 

“You won’t get your family back.”  But she’d given him the keys to a time machine so surely???

“You’ll be the greatest hero of them all.”  Not if recent history was anything to go by.

“You’ll think you’ve lost yourself.”  Now that one he could get behind.

And a journal.  A bloody journal.  A map? A key? Paper soaked in gasoline, ready to burn down history?

It read like a stream of consciousness but his first? - last? - journey in the Mothership showed it for something more.  Yes, there’d been facts relevant to Rittenhouse people, and to meeting the Time Team - please! - but now, with a hole in his shoulder and more alcohol in his veins than anything else, it began to look more like a path to deliberate destruction.

Lucy Preston. Two different women?  One woman who would turn into the other?  The one he’d met hours and nearly a century ago was very different to the one who’d appeared in the bar two years ago.

At the time he’d been drowning and she’s handed him a lifeline.  Now he wasn’t so sure.  More whiskey might help.  Might not.  At this point it was all the same.  It numbed the pain anyway.

The woman in front of the flames had been scared, awed, bewildered, fragile, beguiling.  And fed a pack of lies, but that was by-the-by.  When he’d shown her the journal he’d seen it on her face.  This was impossible, unthinkable and yet on some level she’d wondered.  The germ of a doubt had taken hold as she’d searched his face and he’d hoped... Well, who was he to hope? That she’d see him?  The real him?  That this beautiful creature would allow that doubt to fester and grow until what?  Until she began to work with him?  Wanted to work with him?  Until they became friends?  Something more?

Sao Paulo Lucy hadn’t been anything more to him.  Couldn’t have been anything more to him and said what she’d said.  The journal implied, well it implied a lot.  It never actually said anything directly.  On the first twenty - was it twenty? - read throughs, he’d begun to fill in the missing pieces, fix the puzzle that was only half made.   Now, one mission down, he wasn’t so sure he’d made the right picture after all.

Garcia Flynn had been a clever man.  That was how he’d found the name that had triggered everything.  He hadn’t been clever enough, strong enough, brave enough, fast enough, not nearly enough to save his beautiful girls. And there wasn’t nearly enough alcohol in the hideout to continue with this line of thought.  There were, however a team of men in the other room who’d be able to hear him weep if he kept going like this.

No.  He was thinking about Lucy.  Not Present Lucy, with her pretty eyes who’d pulled at something almost forgotten in him. Future Lucy.  And there he was missing something.  Something he should have understood earlier.  Something just out of his grasp.

Oddly, the alcohol helped to bring the night she’d appeared to him into clearer focus.  She’d looked good.  Not just attractive, both versions of her were that, but good.  Healthy.  Well rested.  Preternaturally calm, considering.  Not a soldier, not someone recently recovering from a fight, but someone who’d been living a normal life.  

How?

If what the journal said was true they’d been fighting Rittenhouse for years, bouncing from time to time, reacting to any attempt to change history.

The final entry had them almost losing the war.  Lucy was hurt.  At the time of writing she hadn’t known how she was going to find the strength to stand up let alone continue the fight.  That wasn’t the Lucy he met.  

Why?

In the bar Lucy hadn’t been alone.  He’d not paid them any attention at the time but having seen Wyatt and Rufus up close now he knew they’d been with her.  If the journal was to be believed then at some point Lucy and Wyatt would have shared a brief, painful liaison.  Much of the inner thought process in the journal was dedicated to Lucy overcoming that incident and trying to talk herself back into some semblance of a friendship with the soldier.

It was clear to Flynn now, albeit with the aide of drink, that Future Lucy had not just been working with her former beau. Wyatt had been possessive of her.  Proprietary.  The journal had no entries of them reaching this place.  Ergo the journal was incomplete.  Deliberately?

Future Flynn had not come to Sao Paulo.  Wouldn’t he have been the most able to convince himself of the need for this course of action?  Where had he been?  The notes on time travel Bruhl had given him implied that travelling within his own timeline was impossible.  But he’d met Lucy, seen the team.  So... Not impossible.  Which left what?  He didn’t think it was necessary?  Unlikely.  He couldn’t be bothered?  No. He was not with the team anymore?  But the journal was almost explicit in its notations of Flynn’s devotion to Lucy so surely he wouldn’t just have left?  Unless he hadn’t wanted to leave.  Unless he was … dead?

If he was dead though the team had a time machine.  They’d have gone back to save him.  Right?  After all, he was the one person, the only person, in the team Lucy had trusted with her inner most thoughts.  No way could they have been as close as those pages implied and then she just left him to die.  Unless.  Well unless the journal wasn’t as true as it made itself out to be.  

Was something rotten in the state of Denmark?

Sloppily pouring the last of the bottle into a glass that was definitely shrinking Flynn allowed his thought to spiral unchecked.  A burning blimp.  Lincoln must die.  He would shoot the president?  Had shot?  Who knew?  A beautiful, broken Lucy lying on the floor.  A brother risen from the dead.  A cold concrete bunker.  Midnight vodka conversations. Country roads.  Blues singers.

Blues.

Future Lucy had not been blue.  Brittle, maybe, but not unhappy.  She had the look of a woman used to smiling.  How could she smile at him if she’d left him to die?  What kind of woman was this future vision?  

Maybe it was the alcohol.  Maybe he was feeding his paranoia.  But she’d smiled at him even though with every heartbeat he became more convinced his future self was gone.  Turned to dust.  And for what?  Future Lucy’s happy ever after?  Was she worth it?  A woman who’d come to him at his weakest and told him nothing he wanted or needed would happen but had somehow managed to get what she wanted?  What was this journal?  Where was it supposed to lead?

The journal opened a time loop.  The woman who had handed him the book wanted to continue on her current path so she was using it to make sure the same events happened again.  How many times had they done this dance?  How many times had this future version of Lucy Preston set him up to die?

No.  Not this time.  No chance.  Not this version of Garcia Flynn.  This Flynn was the master of his own fate, not a puppet to have his strings pulled for the gain of others.

Bone deep, he knew the Lucy Preston in his timeline was not that woman.  No-one was that good an actress. So before he set foot in the Mothership again he was going to speak to her.  They were going to have an honest conversation and work this out.

This Flynn was no one’s sacrificial lamb.

And just as soon as he woke up from passing out he was going to make a brand new entry for Lucy to write about.

[inspector-montoya-fox]

#13 - Menace from the North, eh!

Setting part 1: i mean......... whatever, right? at this point, India got 2 levels and Prague got 2 levels so i’m like ok, let’s get this over with. and i genuinely believe this and Anatomy for Disaster are the game’s two weakest episodes, despite the great conclusion. look, SP... they fucking delivered. they served absolute excellence with episodes 2-4, but it’s getting redundant and Menace from the North, eh! is just Menace from the North, meh? (please forgive me Lord). the game takes a weird environmentalist turn, which i fully appreciate but am ultimately confused by, seeing as He Who Tames The Iron Horse had absolutely nothing to do with Jean Bison’s pollution aspect. it feels weird to return to a Canadian outing after the gang had such a successful run in the previous episode, which felt like a conclusion even with the absence of a bossfight. like, SP could have easily inserted a Bison bossfight at the end of He Who Tames The Iron Horse in order to add another Klaww Gang member for an extra episode or maybe replace Menace from the North, eh! with the lost Monaco episode. it sounds like i’m bitching a lot, and i actually am. what really takes me aback every single time i play this game is that after you complete the Rajan/Contessa saga, it all becomes so anticlimactic. and i can’t comprehend why. by the end of this episode, the stakes are so high but the drive just isn’t there. and it’s not because the gang is demotivated. Sly has been having so much fun throughout the game, even with Neyla’s backstab being a huge obstacle. so getting down, dirty and serious is a much needed mood change. but i feel like i speak for all of us when i say that episodes 5-7 are overshadowed by episodes 2-4. with a few alterations to the order of the episodes and some changes to the script, i really think we could have had an awesome Contessa vs Clock-La final showdown episode and have Bison come right after Dimitri. because, honestly, Canada feels like ‘second episode’ material.

Setting part 2: i’m splitting it up because i don’t want my rant above to spoil the actual writing. the gang sticks around for another Canadian caper after some kooky stuff goes down with the environment and, mainly, the Northern Lights, which as we’ll soon find out, play a rather unexpectedly significant role in the grand scheme of things. and we’re treated to a log-chopping area, an off-the-maps secretive camp which really ups the ante, because Jean Bison is being such a jerk to nature. we’ve got deforestation, we’ve got melting ice, exploitation of wild animals, and Bison getting a raging red boner by literally destroying the environment in order to flex in the Lumberjack Games..... both the player and the gang have had enough of this dude, and i think SP used the fact that his only traits are being an angry idiot and a bigot to their advantage. instead of providing the necessary character development as they did with the Contessa and Rajan, Bison and his actions (especially his communication with the mYsTeRiOuS Arpeggio) are used as a prelude to Anatomy for Disaster. there’s not really a lot of dialogue apart from the final mission and bossfight, because the overall Klaww Gang plot begins to unravel, and particularly so by the time we find out about the lighthouse and its technological contents. in fact, if you think about it, Anatomy for Disaster starts with Clock-La’s shitshow and an info-dump at the beginning, which, if you’ve been paying enough attention to the details (i know that until i turned 12 and replayed the game as a young teen i hadn’t been paying attention to shit so it was all gasp!), is just the connecting of the dots. Menace from the North, eh! is essentially the last piece of the puzzle, before it’s all given to us in full detail by Arpeggio. i mean, apart from Dimitri serving dishes with drugs in them (i still can’t get over that at the age of 21), the rest is all things the player could pick up. and that’s this episode’s main focus. trying to prevent the inevitable under countdown, before Arpeggio’s blimp arrives to collect the Northern Lights energy. so it feels very anticlimactic and strange to put in all this effort without purpose. if you’ve played it before, you know it’s all for nothing since all the parts will be gone by the end of the episode. and it’s even more anticlimactic (although hilarious in tonal shift) to see how the gang scrambles under the pressure of preventing the Klaww Gang’s doomsday by hacking boats and having all these grandiose plans involving the lighthouse, just to then resort to taking part in the Lumberjack Games, without even a clever scheme but actually just cheating, and finally have Bison, an idiot, foil their plans by finding out where they’ve been hiding. and the bossfight is fine, but again, meh... i mean, woohoo Bentley! or whatever the fuck.

Characters: let’s talk about Jean Bison and his mistreatment as a character. we first meet him at Rajan’s ball, where Bentley introduces him as a Canadian shipping baron and says that he owns half the trains in Canada. later on, during the introductory cutscene for He Who Tames The Iron Horse, we get his backstory and how he’s risen from being practically dead, frozen since his time, and back with a vengeance against the environment. in my previous #episodeproject entry i said: SP plays up Bison’s savagery and gruesome nature by spotlighting how his plans affect the environment and even going so far as to call his house ‘the lair of the beast’. this is all true but is never put into practice. like, Jean Bison is all tell and no show, y’know? even the cutscene that plays when Sly gets caught in Bison’s cabin during He Who Tames The Iron Horse’s first mission shows Bison getting angry, but hunty, that’s about it. apart from the Lumberjack Games and his bossfight, it’s all oh Bison will get angry and oh Bison will kill us with the talons. well, where is it? where’s the fucking Canadian shipping baron with a vengeance against the environment? my baby heart was legit quivering when we had to steal Rajan’s blueprints as Bentley, and the Contessa was such a grand sleazebag of a woman, like what a douchebag - and you see that, although i’m often flamboyant in my writing (!!!), the way i describe these moments with these villains is both effective and relatable, because they showed up and lived up to their descriptions. Bison was written to be a ferocious beast of a villain but never showed that. and that’s on SP. whatever... let’s talk about the gang. now, despite the gang looking seriously badass in the opening cutscene for this episode (image below), they’re actually in a pretty good headspace. they’re only missing the talons and whatever Clockwerk parts Arpeggio had before collecting all of them. so it’s only natural for them to feel a bit cocky, and that’s actually gonna be their demise. before that, i just wanna mention that almost all the missions here (as with He Who Tames The Iron Horse) are group missions: Sly and Murray infiltrate the moose club in RC Combat Club, all three of them work together in Lighthouse Break-In, Boat Hack, and Old Grizzle Face. what really stood out to me every time i played this episode, is how, at the end when they take down Bison and they rush to the battery, each member has a different way of entering it, which is a small detail but important nonetheless. this further reinforces how united the gang has become since the Contessa levels and how their bond has strengthened. now, lemme circle back to how they’re cocky. i mean, apart from Jean Bison, Menace from the North, eh! doesn’t present any immediate danger or like trouble, seeing as both Neyla and Carmelita are absent. without any interference, the gang had lots of breathing space to plan ahead, even under countdown before Arpeggio’s blimp arrived. and they kinda wasted the opportunity because, as i’ve already mentioned, the operation was an absolute train-wreck. there’s no plan b, or like something clever or whatever. and usually, the operations tend to get disrupted by third parties, such as Carmelita or Neyla, but here, it failed because it was never smart. and it’s only natural for them to fall hard (by losing all the Clockwerk parts) after feeling all cocky (maybe i’m being too harsh). and all this directly leads to some more Bentley character development.... again. look, i’m all for character development, but the turtle already faced his demons when he busted Sly and Murray out of jail. i know we got Murray vs Rajan, but i don’t know, Murray was always kinda just there throughout the game. the hippo had his ups and downs (face-off with Rajan, imprisonment, losing the van), but not a fully realised story arc. that’s why, when Sly 3 starts off with his enlightenment and return, that story arc is instantly so iconic. i could go on about how Bentley gains self-confidence after defeating Bison, but um, we’ve already done that sis.

Themes: He Who Tames The Iron Horse and Menace from the North, eh! should have been one episode and i truly believe that. they could have shared the same themes. for the former, i said there’s the speed theme, and that applies here too because the gang are under pressure. the countdown lights a fire under their asses and it’s all very destructive. again, there’s an antithesis between the calm Canadian atmosphere and the chaotic energy of the missions. but it’s not just speed theme anymore, it’s more like theme of ferocity. everyone’s kinda on edge??? Old Grizzle Face is a motherfucker and we get up close and personal with the eagles, lasers destroy huge ice pieces, there’s a mammoth, the destroyed oil manes create fiery air drafts... chaos. and it all results in the disastrous events and outcome of the Lumberjack Games, which make Menace from the North, eh! the straightest episode in the game. yuck. it only makes sense for the missions to become less sneaky and more destructive as the stakes get higher and the gang is in a hurry, and that kinda embodies the pollution motif/ environment motif. it’s less of a theme and more of a motif because it’s so story-centric, but that’s the other things the comes into contrast with the calm environment. saws, the buzzing, chopped-up logs flowing down the river, tree stumps spread across: these embody the pollution and the harm Jean Bison has been doing even though it’s a forced storyline in my opinion. and finally, size theme. it’s not major, but it feels like everything’s bigger in Canada... Sly feels so puny in this episode, like especially when climbing the lighthouse. the wild animals are huge, the structures are huge, Jean Bison’s house is huge. it’s just lots and lots of nothingness. if you took absolutely nothing and enlarged it by 10 times, you’d have this episode’s hub. and this is also seen in the bossfight when tiny Bentley takes on Jean Bison. so yea.

What I Like: gliding off the lighthouse and throwing fish onto already stinky guards before Old Grizzle Face rips them to shreds. also, those cute lil catfish-lookin viruses in Bentley’s hacking! they’re so adorable.

What I Don’t Like: erm... it’s not that i don’t like this episode, but i find it kinda boring? apart from interacting with the wild animals, the missions are meh. and i hate the Lumberjack Games...

Quote: Get too close and old Grizzle Face will be eating barbecued raccoon for dinner.

[madebycoffee]

OH ALSO I finished watching Legend of Korra and here is non spoiler thoughts: I really enjoyed it and just like atla I cried at every single season finale. I really like that the main cast while still young, is older than the lITERAL children of atla. atla still holds up watching it as an adult, but I feel like korra is a bit more my jive. There is only one episode that I won’t watch again (season 4 remembrances, when you are binging the show it isn’t necessary as it’s a recap and not as fun as ember island players which serves the same purpose in atla. Also I looked on IMDB, that is the lowest rated episode. I agree. Honestly, if you are binging you can skip it) but I can def see myself watching the whole thing again. Season 1 is my overall favorite of the series. 

Spoiler thoughts below the cut because WOW I HAVE THOUGHTS (it’s long)

hi spoiler time last chance to look away

Before going into LOK I had read a decent amount of spoilers beforehand since this aired back in 2012-2014. I don’t think I even knew about it after it was nearly done so the one thing I knew was that Korra & Asami get together lol. Anyway my point is I knew what was coming overall.

Season 1: My personal favorite, I think it’s a really strong stand alone season. I thought it was really smart to begin the series in the water tribe again, as well as with Katara as that’s how ATLA started. I also think its really clever that with Aang, he was very spiritual and a master airbender already, but needed to learn the other 3 element. Korra is the opposite. It helps it not be so repetitive. We already saw one avatar working to master fire, water, and earth. I also realized how used to the world of atla I was and was confused for a split second how Mako and Bolin were brothers but one was an earthbender and one was a firebender... Yeah I know I’m dumb and I forgot that its a different world lol.  -Another strong point was that no matter how in danger Korra got in season 1 she never went into the avatar state, because as she says in what ep 1? that she has never been good at the spiritual side of being the avatar. Part of me kept expecting it to happen, but even the final showdown with Amon it didn’t so I was like oh damn. The finale when she does go into the avatar state with Aang giving her the bending she lost back.... I was a wreck. Sobbing my eyes out it just HIT ME.  -Other moments that hit me hard: Hearing Dante Basco’s voice as General Iroh ow my soul, Hearing through Katara that Sokka is dead, The flashbacks to the trial of the bloodbender (forgot his name??) and seeing them get bloodbent HURTS MY HEART. And every time Aang’s statue was shown. ;-; Also, just like ATLA there isn’t a main character that I dislike. I genuinely like Korra, Asami, Mako, & Bolin as a team. Lin is my favorite which not hard being Toph’s daughter lol. Tenzin and fam are a delight (though Meelo can get on my nerves but eh)  TL:DR SEASON 1 IS GREAT I CAN’T WAIT TO WATCH IT AGAIN!!

Season 2: Alright so. A lot of Spirit World dealings. Unalaq being a GASP evil brother??? LOK has a thing about brothers lol. First with Amon and whathisname, now with Korra’s dad and uncle. Anyway, season 2 I really like too. Yes even the finale. And it’s been a few weeks (maybe months??) since I watched season 2 so the finale is really all that stands out. Other than that I do really like seeing the story of the first avatar. OH MAN AND IROH IN THE SPIRIT WORLD HAD ME ALL SORTS OF LEVELS OF EMOTIONAL. -SO. This was the big spoiler I knew going in, that the past lives of the Avatar are severed from Korra. I know that A LOT of people really don’t like it either. And upon hearing that plot point I didn’t like it as well. But when I sat down and watched the whole series. I actually thought it was the right thing to do. And I didn’t mind it as much as I thought. Korra can no longer call upon the past lives which is sad, but those Avatars still existed. And with Tenzin being so prevalent in the show, it really feels like Aang is still there in spirit. The reason I thought it was the right thing to do with the story, is that it let’s the show as a whole exist on it’s own. IDK how to properly explain.. I get why people don’t like it, but it makes sense to me. -And I do commend the show runners for sticking to this. There is no getting contact back with the past lives. Which, personally I approve of. Whenever you do something world altering like that it annoys me when the show takes it back. My main gripe is people dying but wAIT NO THEY’RE ALIVE!!! It lessens the stakes. And I think a through line of Korra is that actions have consequences. TL;DR I LIKE SEASON 2 AS WELL. DOESN’T LEAVE A LASTING IMPRESSION SINCE THE FINALE IS SUCH A BIG DEAL.

Season 3: I THINK this would be my second favorite season. I REALLY like Zaheer as I guess the ~big bad~ and the squad he has. SO much so that I’m actually upset that they all are dead by the end. I think P’Li is done the dirtiest. You see and know very little about her until an ~exposition~ line a few scenes before she dies. (But damn if the scene of Su throwing her metal breastplate around her head isn’t hardcore cool. I haven’t said yet but the fight sequences in Korra??? Amazing.) Bolin finding out he can Lavabend??? oh hell yeah that’s the good shit, same with lavabending in GENERAL. seeing what people can REALLY do with their bending is probably my favorite part about Korra. I do think Zaheer looks a little silly when he starts flying around, but hey that part is cool too. Also easily the most horrified I’ve been watching this show was the pulling the aiR OUT OF SOMEONE. JESUS. Up until that point Airbending still seemed like the least dangerous form but HOLY SHIT. I will say that the way Kuvira is if not introduced/ we’re reminded about her in the finale is a little bit more like “uhhh is Korra’s dad going to have an affair???” to me than “she gonna be the big bad next season” Also on IMDB the finale of season 3 is the highest rated finale. 

Season 4: Even thought this has the same number of episodes as season 3, it feels the most rushed to me. However I do appreciate the timejump and GODTDAMN I love me some old lady Toph. I also like that Toph says that she’s watching Su & Lin through the swamp, an episode or two later Su and Zaofu are attacked and captured, and when Lin, Opal, and Bolin go to Zaofu to try and rescue, Toph is there. It’s a nice payoff. As Su was getting captured I was thinking “hmmmm does Toph see this” And she does, which has her leave the swamp, so she’s not there when Kuvira’s army is cutting vines. Because cmon is Toph was there she woulda kicked their asses. -The huge mecha suit with the spirit weapon on it is HARROWING. I like that Baatar Jr. see’s that Kuvira was gonna kill him for thE gREatER gOOD and was instantly like “oh shit well i guess my loyalties were wrong then ok” Oh and out of order but I had a feeling that Zhu Li was telling Kuvira what she wanted to hear to be sneaky and I was v happy to be proven right by Toph. I ALSO like that things like Toph being able to tell if people are lying aren’t forgotten about. Also... Cried like a baby at Zhu Li and Varrick’s wedding. Haven’t mentioned Varrick yet but hot damn if he isn’t one of my favorite characters. What I wouldn’t GIVE to have Sokka and Varrick brainstorm some truly crazy shit. 10/10.  TL;DR SEASON 3 IS REALLY GOOD AND SEASON 4 IS GOOD BUT FEELS LIKE IT’S TOO SHORT.

But yeah. Overall I really enjoyed it. I looked through the episodes on IMDB and nearly everything is above 8.5 except for some of the first episodes in season 2 which I get. I can tell that this is by the same team that did ATLA. It feels so much the same. And I think there was the right amount of the original peeps or their kids but still was focusing on our core four. Other little things:

- I like that the “villains” or ig the conflicts of people weren’t anyone from the Fire Nation. (Although do we know where Zaheer is from??? Family lineage?) Well regardless, what we have is Amon: Waterbender, Unalaq: Waterbender, Zaheer: Airbender, Kuvira: Earthbender. ATLA we were fighting the fire nation, LOK has the range lol. - I do wish we could have been in the Fire Nation tho. I wanna see what’s it like over there :( - Adored seeing all the changes to the world. In ATLA we see the blimps/airships more or less being invented and then 70 years later AIRSHIPS AND CARS GALORE. And having radios/phones VERY nice. Don’t have to rely on letters or talking in person.  - I really like Korra. I feel like it needs to be said lol, but I thoroughly enjoyed her as the Avatar (maybe more than Aang??) - Zuko’s face after Korra says she talked to Iroh in the spirit world I’m not crying you are.

ANYWAY. I think that’s it. I just needed to get it all out somewhere. Not a perfect show (neither is atla) but damn if it isn’t some of the best TV out there. If you read all of that woW good job.

[thijihiguri]

The Emperor’s Ascension, Pt. 3 (& Denouement)

Two times now has the world of Elementa been trapped in stasis.  The first was at the very beginning of this battle, when the Snow Flower herself, Koyuki Kazahana, High Empress of Hyoga, emerged from on high to face her beloved husband in battle.  Of the many obstacles he had overcome up until now, Thiji battling his own wife would be his greatest.  Still, he pressed on, goaded by Koyuki to face her with all he had.

The second occurrence is the current sight everyone struggled to behold: a blade pierced Koyuki’s body by Thiji’s hand.  Though it was expected to happen eventually, the sight was too much for many to stomach. The Handmaidens of Peace, the Royal Family’s most loyal sect of warrior-priests, had practically fainted on the spot, save for Sylla, Shijima, and Celuwen, who watched on with mouths agape.  Seraphina slowly moved her hands from her eyes to behold the scene, gasping loudly once she did.  

“Princess Seraphina, with me!” Umi spoke as she rose from her seat.  “We go now to attend your mother.”

“Y-Yes, Auntie Umi!” Seraphina said reluctantly.  Shiro silently nodded and followed them down.

As they left the stands, Koyuki let out a soft exhale as she lost the strength to stand, slowly falling backwards.  Thiji quickly caught his wife and pulled his blade from her body, leaving behind a wound that had frozen over.  The Diamond Emperor dropped a knee, cradling Koyuki in his arms.  Though there was little expression on his face, he still felt sorrow for what he had done.

“All right – mic me, boys!” Nora said with a snap of her fingers.  The cameramen took out a pair of lavalier mics from his pocket and tossed them over to the Teal Quaintrelle, who then chucked them straight down into the stadium, landing beside Thiji and Koyuki.  As if on cue, Thiji took them in hand and attached one to his robe, and the other to Koyuki’s qipao.  “And now, the big reveal!”

“That was tough to watch, even for me…” Homura sighed.

“It was tough for all of Elementa, sister,” Sakuya replied, “but the plan has been carried out flawless so far.  The time has come to commence the summoning.  I already sense Mizore is channeling her energies to complete this process; let’s not keep her waiting too long.”

Raiko and Homura nodded and left their luxury room to teleport to Nora’s dirigible.  Meanwhile, Koyuki gazed upon her beautiful husband, who had laid a hand upon his cheek.

“Koyuki…” was all he could get out before she interrupted him with a finger to his lips.

“Be still, my lord…” Koyuki said, her voice weak.  The microphones attached to their clothing amplified their voices so that everyone within the stadium could hear them clearly, along with everyone else watching throughout the world.

“But, my flower…” he tried to speak again, only to be shushed.

“Still, my love… hear me,” she repeated, smiling.  “Ever since you were born, you were destined… for greatness.  Ever faithfully has the Higuri Clan served my Pure Branch, but you were meant to do more than serve… All your life, you have served me and my family, but the truth is… we’ve held you back.  Your strength and potential, limited… because the love you had for us softened your heart. We curtailed the Diamond Prophecy, though we did not know it at the time… the Trials of Winter was to help reshape you into who you were; what you were meant to be.  You had to let go of me in order to become the Diamond Emperor… It was difficult at first… but I accepted it with time.  To ascend, you had to strike down your flower… Love is a powerful force, and I always uphold its values… but it can make us complacent… it can bring our guard down… it can even end us.  But not you, Thiji.  You’re meant to become a force far greater, and after bringing our Hyoga into the golden age of prosperity it now has, you have fulfilled your duties as a mortal…”

Seraphina, Umi, and Shiro hurried to the field, but Shiro pointed out that flowers were beginning to blossom through the snow-covered ground.

“What… What’s this…?” Seraphina asked.

“Her power is being spread throughout the land,” Shiro explained.  “She is returning to nature.”

“Is… Is my mother dying…?”

“No, she is not, thankfully,” Umi replied, “but she has suffered too much damage to maintain her form; she is one with nature, and therefore cannot perish easily.”

“You Kazahana sure did luck out in the superpower lottery…” Shiro grumbled, a hint of jealousy in her voice.  She then spotted a familiar flower materializing right above Koyuki.  “No way… is that -?”

A delicate snow-white flower with purple stamens appeared above Koyuki’s body, and around the stamens were tiny blue snowflakes dancing about.  The flower slowly descended to her right hand, which she then presented to Thiji.

“Do you know what this is, my lord…?” she asked him.  He looked upon it and gasped.  He wanted to reach out and touch it, but was too focused on holding his weakening wife.

“It’s… It’s the first Snow Lily that marked your birth!” Thiji answered.  Koyuki grinned at his response.

“The very first Snow Lily – yes,” she confirmed.  “I kept and safeguarded it all my life, for the right moment to show it to you.”

Something else had begun to emerge from the flower: a tiny, coin-shaped object – no bigger than a poker chip – materialized and levitated in front of Thiji’s head, expecting him to grab it.

“Koyuki… what is this?” Thiji asked.

“The Proof of the Snow Flower…” she replied.  “This was the final battle in your Trials.  I was the only other Lady of Winter standing in your way in Elementa, and I was determined to harden your heart for the task.  If you failed this day… The gods would have been displeased. But they knew you were stronger than that; I knew you were stronger than that. And now that it’s all over, I can gaze upon you… one last time, as a mortal.  I’m so proud of you, Thiji…”

As their conversation continued, Seraphina began feeling another reaction coming.  This one, however, was more familiar to her.

“It’s been a long time, my beloved child,” spoke a female voice to her telepathically.

“Mother Moon..!!” she gasped.  “How may Your humble daughter serve you?”

“I have need of you for a moment; mind if I use you as a vessel?”

“Whatever your desire, O Luminious One!”

The clouds parted once more as a beam of lunar energy shot down from the heavens, enveloping the Alabaster Rose.  Shiro and Umi jumped out of the way, watching in awe.

“That’s the sign, sisters!” Sakuya spoke.  They channeled the powers of Izanami, Izanagi, and Amaterasu – the gods who chose them to be Eternals – into the pillar, causing an elemental reaction which created a rainbow bridge.  Everyone shielded their eyes from the light as it washed over the stadium and the entire Borealis Tundra.

Moments later, the light faded, and everyone scanned their surroundings – the sky was once again cast into night, with the silvery moon illuminating Hyoga.  Turning center stage, everyone noticed that Seraphina had transformed into a taller, yet equally slender woman of blue-violet hair and a silver-white-and-blue floral dress.  On the right side of her head was a silvery-blue flower in full bloom, and in her hands was a pristine harp.  She plucked the strings and the moon’s light filled the stadium.

“Iss thiss… the powerss of a God?” Z’hira asked.  “To witnesss one appear before uss…”

“The Divinity of Night; the Lady of the Moon…” Hiro spoke under his breath.  The other Eternals jumped down from the blimp and landed behind Thiji, sticking the landing in a kneeling position.

“It has been far too long since I’ve taken a stroll in the mortal realm,” the Goddess said as she stretched.  The Handmaidens of Peace watched in awe as the Goddess of the Moon descended to grace them.  “You’ve come a long way, Thiji Higuri.  All that has happened up to this point shaped you into who you are now.  Thy wisdom; thy strength; thy intellect; your heart of diamond – these are the tenets that deem you more than qualified to become an Eternal – should you accept.  Just as I have chosen thy mother, Mizore, I have found thee more than worthy to ascend.”

She then turned to Koyuki, who met her gaze with a grin.

“High Empress Koyuki… your mother would be so proud.  But it pained all of us to put you through this.  You truly are worthy of the name ‘Kazahana’, and the Snow Flower from which sparked your birth.”

“I did what I must, Lady Tsukuyomi…” whispered Koyuki, her voice very weak at this point, “for him… I only hope that Thiji can forgive his flower…”

“I already forgive you, Koyuki… I do,” Thiji spoke, now holding her close.  He deliberated for a moment before looking up towards Tsukuyomi.

“Speak thy mind, Diamond Emperor,” the Moon Goddess urged.

“I accept this charge, Lady Tsukuyomi,” he began, “however… I wish to begin anew.”

“Pray explain thyself.”

“I know that Eternals are reborn after death as they can never be truly killed, and with each rebirth they are stronger… but I wish to be reborn as an infant.  This way, my power will be exponentially more immense, and I may better serve towards Elementa’s safekeeping.”

“WHAAAAT?!” Homura shrieked, fire spewing from her maw.  “That clever bastard’s gonna deny me a sparring partner?!”

“Dial it down, Homura; the mics are still on…” Raiko grunted whilst covering her ears.

“I’m sure Mizore’s going to be ecstatic over this,” chuckled Sakuya.  “She’d want nothing more than to hold her little Thiji again.”

“Very well, and very astute of thee,” Tsukuyomi stated.  “I shall make it so, but you’ve many friends gathered here; I will allow thee one final chance for any parting words with them.”

The Diamond Emperor nodded and turned to everyone present.  Shiro approached and gave Thiji a kiss on the cheek.

“It’s been a hell of a ride, Thiji,” Shiro began.  “You’ve helped me save a lot of people, and the missions we’ve been on together have been the most memorable ones ever.  It’s going to hurt me seeing you go, but there’s a secret I’ve been keeping from you for quite some time now.”

She turned their attention towards the stands.  A cloaked figure in white sat alone.  Lifting the hood revealed a young girl with hair like Shiro’s, only slightly bluer, with Thiji’s eyes.  She wore a white-and-blue gown and her face was filled with tears.  “You see that young woman there?  That’s Soyo – my daughter.  Your daughter.”

“The Princess has a stepsister…” Umi said under her breath.

“WOW!  That’s unexpected!” Nora commented.  “I knew Thiji got around, but…!”

“Because of you, my Clan survives.  And I’ve discovered that some of us survived the purge.  The Lands of Kiri have a princess, and I’ve discovered that some of my kin have survived the purge.  We would not have survived without you, Thiji, and to this, I owe you so much.”

Da Ji hurried over to Thiji, teary-eyed as ever.

“My Emperor,” she began, “I will wait for your rebirth, and when you return, I will do my utmost for you! I… I only ever wish to serve you – as a mortal, and as a Goddess.  I will forever be yours…”

“And I am grateful to have your love and support, Da Ji,” Thiji replied.  He then turned over towards his brother, his gazing firmly upon him.  “It will fall upon you and Seraphina to lead Hyoga in our absence.  Though the Snow Flower will return, I must answer a higher call.  But Hyoga’s sanctity will always be my prime concern.  Horu. You’ve the entirety of the Tundra Force and the Handmaidens of Peace backing you; you’ve numerous allies and advisors.  Reach out to them; lean on them if you must…”

“We won’t fail you, Brother,” Horu acknowledged.  “I’ll watch over Empress Seraphina as well.  Your shoes will be difficult to fill, but I’ve learned much from you.”

A large flower began to blossom in the center of the stadium.  It opened one of its petals as the last of Koyuki’s power seeped into and nurtured the now verdant area.  She gazed upon her beloved husband once more, a smile on her face as she gave her final words:

“Thiji… you were, are, and always will be… my light… my lord… my love.”

Her strength all but spent, Koyuki’s arm slowly fell to the ground, her eyes shutting into a peaceful sleep.  Though they knew she was not gone from this world, the scene was no less heartbreaking to watch.  Thiji lifted her body and carried it into the flower, placing her comfortably inside of its petals.  As it closed, a violet pulse emanated from the plant, thereby “sealing” it.  With the Snow Flower laid to rest, it was finally time.  Thiji turned towards Tsukuyomi, but another voice would make itself known beforehand:

“Thiji!” cried a tearful Nora.  “Don’t you dare think this marks the end of your career!  There’s gonna be A LOT of ideas I’ll be throwin’ at you when you’re reborn!”

Everyone couldn’t help but laugh – even Tsukuyomi.  But with all said and done, the Goddess called upon Her divine powers, showering the Diamond Emperor in lunar energy.  The light could be seen from as far as the Frozen Sea, and after a long moment of bathing in its luminescence… all went quiet.  The moonlight had faded, the skies returned to normal, and Thiji and Tsukuyomi had vanished.  Seraphina levitated back down to earth, laying a hand upon her mother’s resting place. It was warm, as if her mother’s presence was still evident, responding to her daughter’s touch.

“Rest well, Mother. I promise that Hyoga will be better off than when you left it,” she said with a smile.

With his brother’s ascension now complete, and Koyuki’s own rebirth underway, Horu’s first order as Emperor was to consecrate the Borealis Stadium to allow her sister-in-law the blissful sleep she deserved.  In a year’s time, she would reemerge, ready to rule Hyoga once more as the Great Empress, just like her mother.  Masao was given the charge to protect the holy site in place of the Virgin Snow Courtyard, to which she was more than honored to accept.  Though Hyoga was definitely still well into its golden age, there would still be disreputable types who would aim to take advantage of this succession.  However, their powerful new allies in the Glacierfin extended their reach to beyond the Frozen Shore, and the Kirishinobi would serve as Horu’s personal honor guard.

Sometime later, Thiji began his new immortal life as an infant, per his request.  Mizore happily carried and walked him around the Antarctic Glade, showing him the domain was far vaster than when he originally visited. All who inhabited it witnessed their new lord, and pledged their fealty to him.  While he rested and grew within this new realm, he practiced his newfound abilities through his avatar, which was a simulacrum of what he would look like as a child.  Da Ji had also frequented the Antarctic Glade, accompanying the new Eternal of Ice through her own avatars.  The love she showed for him was adored by Mizore, who was more than happy to allow her passage to and from their realm.  Soon after, he would take his avatar to the mortal world, making his return known to all of Hyoga.  When Koyuki was reborn, she grew another pair of wings, becoming a Seraphim.  After serving her all his mortal life, the time had come for her to serve him – as his beloved Snow Flower Seraphim.  She would gain more specialized powers that complimented her mastery over Floramancy, cementing her place among the Kazahana Pure Branch.

The time had come for the greatest age of Hyoga’s time: The Eternal Age of Iceflowers.

[howtohero]

#228 Air Support

In superhero battles, as with most battles (military, street fighting, rock/paper/scissors) air superiority is crucial. As the old saying goes, “if you control the skies you control who dies”. If your enemy has the high ground, then you might as well give up… and there’s no higher ground than the sky. While many superheroes have inborn flight abilities (most often because they’ve been merged with various birds during freak lighting storms) so, as long as they know how to fly, which for them should be as simple as knowing how to walk. (And if it’s not, check out our entry on flight safety here.) But what of heroes who cannot fly? Are they doomed to constantly be upstaged in every single fight just because their opponent stole a blimp and nobody’s bothered to take it away from them yet?  Not on our watch!

Thankfully, you live in a world of superheroes, which means there are only dozens of ways you can gain air superiority without ever leaving the ground. You can simply team up with somebody who can fly and is really good at punching blimps. Just reach over, grab your phone, make that call, and Bob’s your uncle! But if you don’t have any friends who can fly, or if you have an aversion to Bob being your uncle, well then, there are less than a dozen ways of dealing with the problem, but still quite a few!

How you get around the problem will often come down to what exactly your powerset is. If you can talk to animals then you’ll call in some birds or perhaps a couple of pterosaurs from the Isle of Dinosaurs. If you have the power to induce mass confusion or migraines, simply direct that excedrin encouraging energy at the villain who’s hanging out in the sky and take them down a peg. If you’re a telekinetic then naturally what you want to do it just levitate a bunch of bricks around you all the time so that if anybody tries to fly at you, you can just smack them out of the sky with a brick. Works every time. 

If you don’t have any powers, or you have a power other than one of the one’s we mentioned and you’re not clever enough to figure out how to use it to give yourself air support (message us and then we’ll make fun of you and hold your hand and walk you through it) then worry not, there are still avenues for you to take. You can make wing suits out of wax, you can wear rocket boots, heck just call in an air strike on your enemies. Many superheroes have aerial vehicles that they use when they need to get places, so all you need to do is refit that with weapons and maybe an autopilot that you can control from a panel on your utility belt or gauntlet and viola! You’re a large violin. Heck, you still have that jetpack choir? Have you ever thought about giving them mini guns? That would go a long way towards gaining the upper aerial hand. 

The important thing about your air support though, is to not call them in right away. If you call them in at the beginning of the battle you give your enemies a chance to counter with something bigger and badder. You don’t want to instigate a race for air superiority, because trust me, bad guys will always go bigger. You unleash your you-shaped battle drone, they rip open a hole in the fabric of spacetime and let loose an army of flying eldritch abominations. You put on a heli-backpack, they turn a downtown office building into an airship filled with civilians. Call in a friendly pegacorn that you met on a previous adventure, they call in an unfriendly pegacorn made of bazookas that they built once for no reason at all! As always, when fighting supervillains, it’s important to deal with them quickly and efficiently, only calling additional air support should it prove necessary.

Another thing you need to be aware of when fighting a villain’s air support is that, generally, when things in the sky are disabled, they fall to the Earth. This is going to cause a lot of collateral damage, especially if the bad guys are using a fleet of flying monkeys or one flying blue whale. Now, there are a few ways you can go about eliminating the risk of collateral damage entirely. You can force the bad guy’s air support up into space, this is good if they’re using drones or robots or other such things that don’t need to breathe. If your air support of choice is a large airship that can safely house many smaller flying evil nuisances, go ahead and call it in and either lure the bad guy’s air support into it, or have it simply envelope the zombees or whathaveyou. You can also steal your enemy’s air support. (Especially do this if they have very good air support that is absolutely kicking your butt.) If they’re using machines, have your guy in the chair hack them and turn them against their owner. If they’re using living beings, well, living beings can always be swayed. If they’re of the mindless swarm variety, I suggest simply bribing them with food (I recommend cheese doodles, because I am smart and that is the right thing to do). While a mindless swarm of flying creatures can’t exactly be reasoned with, and they certainly won’t listen to orders even if you bribe them, I’ve found that drenching your enemy in whatever it is they like to eat (Cheese. Doodles.) will very quickly get them to basically do what you want. (You do need to then deal with the swarm after they’ve dealt with the bad guy, but we’ve got plenty of tips for that here.) 

When you’re fighting a bad guy, it is often on more than one front. You’ve got to fight the villain themselves and whatever cockamamie plan they’ve cooked up this week. Probably there’s a giant slug they’ve unleashed down in the sewers or something. And you have to fight them in the air. In a fight for the city, air dominance is crucial, but you also have to be strategic. So make sure you can outfight them, outfly them, and outpace them, and make sure you only do it at the right time.