#the mocking offense lmao

[berlin-daily]

[ursaspecter]

🐺 moon-moon4w00 Follow

Friendly reminder that asking your lycan partner to turn you is incredibly insensitive! Seriously can we retire this trope already? Not only is it just offensive, but no one would ever actually choose this life! Lycanthropy is a curse. Full stop.

🐾 superhowllock69 Follow

Ok user "moon-moon" as if that original meme wasn't created to mock pack nomenclature 🙄

Anyway I'm not gonna touch that internalized lycanphobia with a ten foot pole. Being turned by your partner is something that can be incredibly intimate as long as both parties are consenting and the one being turned is 100% sure they want it. Literally the only downside to transforming once a month is the pain, but midol works just fine. No one with these "lycanthropy bad" takes ever wants to discuss the legitimate positives that come with this "curse" lmao.

🐺 moon-moon4w00 Follow

I'm literally reclaiming moon moon but go off I guess. Anyways turning your partner is absolutely disgusting and morally reprehensible and anyone who does it should be muzzled permanently.

🌜 impawssible Follow

lmao my wife literally saved my life when she turned me but i guess she should be muzzled huh? we run through the woods hunting deer together and can each haul in groceries in one trip now, but nooo she's obviously a danger to society because she cares enough about me to help me when insurance wouldn't cover my medicine

also it was confirmed that the creator of that meme literally makes and sells silver bullets so if you still wanna use moon moon for yourself that certainly is a choice. source: (X)

🦴 pupperoni Follow

I love that instead of naming the more common benefits of lycanthropy, you mentioned that you and your wife can carry all the groceries in one trip. I think that's definitely a positive that gets overlooked far too often and I commend you for speaking your truth, sir

🌜 impawssible Follow

lol thanks but I'm a woman 😅

🦴 pupperoni Follow

🦇 count-fuckula Follow

Plus werewolf blood tastes way better and is as filling as 10 humans 👍

🐺 moon-moon4w00 Follow

Oh my GOD you vampblr freaks will just flock to anything. It clearly says "vamps DNI" in my bio!

🐾 superhowllock Follow

lmaoooo of course you're a vampire exclusionist

🌕 daddy-fenris Follow

wasn't OP the same guy who said fursuits were offensive to lycanthropes and doxxed a werewolf fursuiter?

🐺 moon-moon4w00 Follow

They ARE offensive and harmful to this community and I'm tired of pretending they're not. They perpetuate harmful depictions of what a humanoid wolf is actually like.

🌜 impawssible Follow

me when I dox someone for making candy colored animal costumes that look nothing like what a real werewolf does

🦴 pupperoni Follow

K

🌕 daddy-fenris Follow

U

[saccharinescorpion]

i've been debating on whether to post about this but what the hell, it's relevant both to today's episode and the topic of people trying to smooth over the flaws of Dungeon Meshi characters.... so, uh, remember what i said yesterday about Laios forgetting the basics of human decency when interacting with Izutsumi

i was intially worried about people reading this scene in uhh certain ways but was thankful to see most fans were chill with it... before i realized that. uh. maybe people were being a little too chill

okay............ so,

1. for the record: i believe that it is clear from what we know about him and what we know about the entire series as a whole that, yes, Laios didn't have "untoward" intentions towards Izutsumi in this scene. there's even an aside in Izutsumi's profile in the Adventurer's Bible that says as much. he likely saw it in basically the same way Falin did when she was observing the reproductive organs of the caterpillar in that one scene. FOR THE RECORD this excuse would basically never fly in real life, but for Laios, it actually honestly makes sense... he has a habit of ignoring people's boundaries, he gets ahead of himself when it comes to learning about monsters... he didn't have bad intentions, no, but it doesn't change the fact that he's an adult man (not a [my face contorts with a great pain] "curious boy") who was being really invasive about a teenage girl's body. it was weird. it was 100% weird, lmao, i don't think fans are "lacking media literacy" by saying "uh yeah that was kind of creepy and inappropriate of Laios"

2. and i also don't think it's villifying ND people to say that. if i were to be honest, i would argue the whole "he's just a curious boy :(" thing is a lot more offensive to neurodivergent people. Laios clearly knows about the concept of bodily autonomy- he felt weird and bad about touching Marcille and Senshi in "intimate" ways just to heal them. literally one scene after this one he expresses embarassment about accidentally touching the leg of (who he thinks to be) Marcille. he very obviously possesses the capacity to understand why it would be inappropriate to observe a stranger's body like they were an animal. i can accept the explanation that his monster curiosity temporarily overpowered his "oh actually maybe i shouldn't try to get up close and person with this teenager who i literally just met," but that doesn't change that he had to be restrained from doing that. i'm not even saying he's a "bad person" or anything because of this scene- i just am baffled at the idea of fans being presented with the slightest bit of messiness (he was creepy to a young girl, however unintentionally) and jumping to try and "justify" it (he's just silly, he's socially awkward, he's autistic, he's a Curious Boy) and even mock others who rightfully point out that that was uncomfortable behavior. Laios was creepy to Izutsumi. he didn't mean to, but he did (and to be quite frank he was lucky to get off with a smack from Chilchuck and a blindfold)

3. "I would also ask" excuse me?

[random-ikea-drawer]

ok so i love les miserables

AND I JUST GOT TO SEE IT FOR THE FIRST TIME IN THE NORTH AMERICA TOUR (more specifically Montreal! (yes i flew to an entirely different country to see it)) and i am incredibly attached to enjolras and grantaire so here are just things i saw that made my nails dig into my thighs <3 (not just enjoltaire)

oh my dear months old source of no big sad

this is 90% incoherent rambling (SPOILERS)

- Grantaire had long hair and a long coat i think that deserves its own point

- During Red and Black, Grantaire did the old “Don Juan” with the bottle right in Enjolras’ face (he was not impressed)

- In this same song, Enjolras got really close to R’s face during “don’t let the wine go to your brain”

- Again, in Red and Black, when they tossed Grantaire’s bottle to Enj, teasing him, Grantaire grabbed the bottle in a… way… when he was giving it back to him

- Same song 😭 Grantaire was bouncing on a guy’s lap during the first few verses

- In DYHTPS, Grantaire pulled Gavroche aside away from the students crowding Enjolras (this broke my heart, he clearly loves him and doesn’t want him to be in a war)

- “Glad to do a friend a favor” with a very suggestive hand gesture

- In the “dogs will bark flees will bite”, Grantaire pointed a finger at Enjolras, the former getting real close putting his weapon between them. They got REALLY close

- Gavroche pulled the middle finger at Javert lmao

-Eponine fucking died (i knew that already, seen every bootleg and version available, still hit hard)

- During Eponine’s death Gavroche ran onto the stage, closely followed by Grantaire being held onto by Enjolras

- Gavroche tried approaching Eponine (that’s his sister bro :()) but was stopped and held onto by Grantaire. When she died however, Grantaire quickly bent to hug Gavroche, man the grief was so clear with them both.

- After she died, everyone cleared to their positions but Enjolras and Grantaire, seemingly for Enjolras to try and comfort him, but decided against it quickly and pushed past him. Grantaire placed his hand on his chest in mock offense 😭

- When the attack was about to start, Grantaire mocked and toyed with tied up Javert. When Enjolras called for hold, Grantaire threw his arms around Javert with a “yep!” and cue the battle starting immediately when that happened

- During Grantaire’s verse during Drink With Me, it’s back to Enjolras and Grantaire being center stage. Enjolras approached him, held onto his arm and with the same hand moved up to brush R’s hair, which lead to him breaking off the contact and rushing to the other corner of the stage.

-He was followed by Gavroche, who hugged him from behind and then they both fell asleep next to each other :((

- Gavroche fucking died (i knew he did still heartbreaking) and was caught by Enj, who handed him to Grantaire

- During the Gavroche solo, Grantaire stood center stage looking to the crowd, not even flinching when the gun sounded, only turning around when Gavroche was already at the top of the barricade

- He tried shaking him awake :(( then set him down and stared at him :((

- That was until Marius fell, Enjolras rushing to check on him, making Grantaire rush to his side

- R grabbed onto Enj and they both held the back of each other’s necks,, from my angle it looked like their foreheads touched but idk if they would do that but MANNN

-Enjolras fucking died first (no wtf :(( )

- Grantaire fucking died last (BRO.)

- Everyone fucking died bro

- Except Marius and JVJ of course

- Mr Thenardier, instead of singing “This one’s a queer but what can you do”, sang “This one’s a queer, I’ll try it to!” and dipped a guy in the wedding 😭

- The “to love another person is to see the face of god” line always makes me emotional just :((

that’s it haha hopefully y’all enjoy the ramblings, ty for reading this far, i seriously recommend going to watch it if you can it’s truly the most amazing thing i’ve ever seen man 😭 may be biased but i’m serious

[spotaus]

Did some redesign mock-ups for Ec-4o.verse Cross, Fresh, and Error!

These guys didn't really *need* redesigns but I was having a ball with Trech (Ec-4o!Fresh) and gave him Arcade Carpet designs and decided I needed to redesign some others too! (Check below the cut for Old Designs, Lore, and a Stupid Screenshot from my pal @/Neonsix67)

So OLD DESIGNS:

(We're gonna act like I drew Trech more than twice-)

So, old art, yucky, whatever. We know the drill lmao- but because Ec-4o.verse is such an ongoing project these guys have been through a bunch of redesigns. Regrettably, me from 2 years ago was unaware of Layering and Shape Language, so they look kinda gross.

Cross' design has consistently been my favorite I think, just because he was a later addition and so had a bunch of my newer ideas integrated. They all have their flaws tho (Cross was too lean and got thrown between Baby and Grown Guy too often in my art. Error uhhh... yeesh. When I say I couldn't draw him, I meant it. I never knew what to do with his wires and I kept putting him in armor? Fresh just wasn't fleshed out enough. He was that SparkleDog of my verse.)

Also: I wanted Fresh to be top-heavy, like, big baggy round clothes on his upper half then lil guy legs. Cross I wanted to be more flat and strict, hense his clothes being all Tube-shaped. Then Error needed Triangle vibes. His old design was too Rectangle for me. The exposed limbs are mostly just for me because I love a-symmetry and also I don't keep a consistent clothing style, so I like to keep a visually interesting element (like a limb) exposed for clarity's sake when I draw them in new poses later.

LORE:

Cross: A robot (Ecto) who was initially a Guard-Model ecto. He was one of the last to be turned over when the government was rallying citizens to donate their bots to fight in the war. He was remodeled and supplied with a special task by his Programmer: Protect THE FILES at all costs. He's rather small for a guard-bot, but makes up for it with his agility and sheer stubbornness. Blue finds him heavily damaged and on low battery in an old lab, guarding a room that was sealed tight. His Old design utilized Shields (scarf detached to become them) but his new design is much more focused on quick bursts of offense. If he gets you first, then you're no longer a threat.

Error: an Ecto who was one of the first bots handed over. He was a former data storage bot that worked at a small library. As one of the first data-bots to come in, he was immediately modified and put to work alongside other Ectos to compile all of the nation's history into their data banks. Error was particularly receptive to overloads of data, so he continued to be modified and made into the prime data-bank. When the war started, he was eventually hidden away and sealed in an air-tight room. Eventually Cross was sent to guard the door. They were eachother's only company for... years? Error isn't fond of touch or tampering with hid systems, as everything he knows is barely abd haphazardly stored on unsafe files. Each Crash he endures takes more and more of his own personal data away, and he refuses to lose any more.

Fresh (Trech): A Parasite that was created by Sci to repair living beings in the same way that an Ecto can auto-repair itself. Fresh is actually a liquid that, when placed in contact with a wounded/dying person, it can invade their systems and stop all forms of bleeding/dusting. Fresh wasn't supposed to be sentient, and was meant to be scrapped, but he ended up being vital in stopping the war. In turn, Sci granted him freedom. Fresh can inhabit humans, monsters, and Ectos, but prefers skeleton monsters. He often defies the logic of his world, but what Fresh doesn't? Blue meets him far into the story after he's unraveled a lot of mysteries. Fresh just drops by after hearing rumors of Blue's repair work, and is met by less-than-warm reception from Error and Geno.

Other:

I was trying to save the image and my phone was bugging out, so I sent it to Neon. Safe to say she has peak comedic timing 😌💖 (For the record, we are both adults, and also my parents are aware I draw utmv stuff, so she had to make the threat actually a threat lmao---) I also love Chilchuck talking with the Operator. We are the dynamic duo frfr.

[miguelswifey04]

May I request HCs where Spider![Reader] [Female] teaches her boyfriend, Spider Noir 21st Century slang terms like “rizz”, “sus”, “lowkey”, “delulu”, etc.?

I saw the comic you reblogged about Noir using outdated/offensive terminology since he came from the 1930s.

LMAO yeah that’ll probably fry his brain 🧠😵

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

you taught him some slang words that pertained to gen-z such as “rizz”…one time you told your boyfriend, noir, that he had rizz and he was like “rizz? what—“

“yeah rizz! it’s short for charisma!” you laugh and he would suddenly start laughing LMFAOOOO cause he would be like “wha the hell?? okay cool!”

you educated him in all the new lingo and slang words that have been abbreviated over the course of time—and he finds it hilarious maybe even stupid that every now and then there’s a new word…does he keep up? yah…but does he gets the meanings messed up? YEAH…

so one time noir said “you are so rizz.!” AND YOU BURSTED OUT laughing because he thought it mean “you are so charismatic,” but obviously it doesn’t make sense…”you mean i have rizz? not ‘you are so rizz’” you laughed poking fun of him

he’d roll his eyes in a playful manner and bring his hands up in mock-defense, “oh whatever—i keep getting these darn words mixed up!”

every time he uses new terms such as “lowkey” “delulu” “slay” “sus” he always gets them mixed up but knows what each word’s meaning is—he just sucks at making it sound natural and it comes out forced

he sounds like those millennials who try to act cool or use ‘slang’ but you end up cringing and laughing at his poor attempts 😭

the spidey gang also help him out or corrects him but they all make fun of him whenever he slips up BUT of course they still educate him and keep him updated on new words

he really appreciates him educating on new terminology and words & for taking the time to help his ‘old-self’ even though he’s quite literally a young adult who acts like an old man 😵

[rickfucker]

(kinda emo) Nsfw Rick Headcanons (GN!)

i’ve gained lots of followers since my last post. hello! and welcome to the shitshow. this turned out extra emo! for whatever reason idk. i think it might just be because of how much i love rick this season. he’s a little softer. pls enjoy.

Sex is one of those things that he almost overdid when he was younger. He still loves it, don’t get me wrong, but he used it as an unhealthy coping mechanism in tandem with his drinking. It started losing its spark as he really got on in years.

This man is of the streets. He’s seen it all and he’s done it all.

Definitely a switch. His default is soft dominant. He will give endless praise, from how stunning your body is to how well you take him.

He gets tired, though. He’s spent his whole life fighting shadows of himself; trying to convince himself that he doesn’t need anyone. He wouldn’t ask you outright, necessarily, but if you decide to take the reigns from him for a night, he melts right into it. He wants someone to take care of him. Love him. Be gentle with him, just enough to make him forget about the cruelty of his own existence.

Sex with you is healing for him in that respect. He has done the hard and fast with everyone he’s ever met. You’re a fresh start, like he’s being given a second chance at doing things the right way.

He takes his time with you. To the point of your very obvious frustration. I’m talking hours of foreplay.

He’s the type to gently coerce you into saying exactly what you want in bed, usually in the filthiest way possible. Once again, extra points for the full-body blushing you’ll be doing. He eats that shit up.

He wants to hear you say what you want. That you want him, specifically. Consent is sexy!

Nicknames for days. Sweetheart, baby, hun, sugar, sweetcheeks, lmao. He loves just hearing you say his name, though.

He likes to fuck in weird places. Views it like a sort of challenge.

You would definitely have sex in every room in the house. Kitchen countertops, living room couch, the shower (obviously), laying you out on top of the dining room table (you insist on Clorox-ing afterward because he certainly isn’t going to do it).

He would never risk the possibility of you two being walked in on, though. He’s for sure into exhibitionism to an extent, but not with his family in mind. For your privacy as much as his own. Also his territorial nature. Nobody is viewing the goods but him.

He actually doesn’t want to have sex on his workspace. He’s got too much important shit that can’t risk, ahem, contamination.

If you get awkward of feel embarrassed while bumping uglies, he literally does not care. Everything you do is sexy to him, including all of the very human things about you.

(AFAB) I can’t tell if he’s a boob or a butt guy, but that’s ‘cause he’s a pussy guy. We all know this. He is King of giving head and he fucking loves it. 

(AMAB) Same goes here. King of Giving Head; He WILL give you that sloppy toppy.

Always makes his partner come first.

He can’t pick a favorite position, but he does love it when you ride him, especially dry humping. He likes it when the two of you end up so in the moment that there’s no time for taking off clothes.

Goes absolutely feral when you say you love him.

Sometimes cries a little after really intense sex, but not when you can see him. He’s got all these pent up emotions that just end up toppling over when he lets his guard down.

Pillow talk for a hundred years. He likes it when you start rambling about the future, toying with his hands while you talk softly. “Maybe we could move somewhere closer to the ocean. Or are you more of a cabin in the woods kind of guy?” You laugh at the idea of Rick lounging on the beach, which he takes mock offense to.

You make him think about things he never would have considered before. What reason would he have to ask himself the less important questions of life? Like what his favorite architectural style of home is. What would his perfect vacation look like? If he had to pick a new hobby to start, what would it be? It’s just nonsense, things he would never talk about in front of anyone else due to their irrelevant nature, but in the afterglow with you, he likes it. Maybe it makes him feel more normal; suburban; domestic. Maybe he just likes how dreamily you talk about those things, and the way you give him your full, rapt attention in the quiet sanctity of his tiny bedroom. Nothing else exists but you.

[sug4r-sp1c3]

Hi!

Could you maybe do villanous x a reader who has rabbit ears please? Thanks!!

RULES ARE RULFES NO SPECIFIC CHARACTERS OR THINGS ITS BEING A HC UHHHH

ok lets begin since i'm sleepy ITA 1 AM WHAT THE FUCK

"but sugar-sp1c3 you said your limit was 4 character-" I KNOW OKAYI' JUST FORGOT WHEN DOING THIS

VILLANOUS WITH A S/O WITH RABBIT EARS HCS !!

Characters, Demencia/Dementia, Dr.Flug, 5.0.5(platonic?), Black hat, penumbra, Sun Blast, Miss heed(not in order lol)

Demencia / Dementia

she woudl make fun of then

but like

A LOT

"Hey bunny ears!"

i feel like she would bite them idk

i mean yes she mocks of you BUT THATS HER WAY TO SHOW LOVE TO YOU..at least i think!

she haves 2 sides

the left one where she mocks and jokes and bites of you ears

and the right side where she praises you and your eyes and- you are basically her new black hat

she would often play with them

or if you have both rabbit and human she would be like:

"SO YOU HAVE SUPER HEARING!!?! OMG THATS SO COOL"

Dr. Flug

his first honest reaction is that gif sorry i don't make rules

HE THINKS THEY ARE COOL AND PRETTY ASF

HE MELTS IF THEY EVEN MOVE LIKE

HE JUST STARES AT YOU IN AWWE UNTIL HE SNAPS BACK TO REALITY!

unless his with black hat bc in that case he avoids to look at your ears at all cost since the "jefecito" can notice and idk yeah

he would probably want to do some experiments

but only friendly ones!!

like testing if you can do other things

if you have extra sensitive ears

or somthn idk i have no ideas rn

he would like to caress them on his little free time

oh btw he would LOVE if you and 5.0.5 where like best buddies or you would be his second parent-like figure(i swear i am trying to make his non specified gender I SWEAR GUYS)

he just lvoes you and you ears so much

5.0.5

he's a fucking bear bruh 💀

ok so thsi will be platonic like buddies or a second parental figure, or smthn like that

he loves to "talk" about your ears or ask you questions.(if you don understand them he would force flug to translate lmao)

he is very careful when he is trying to touch them since y'know..big paws

but he still tries!!

i imagine if he maked cupcakes the icing would be a drawing of an airplane, of dementia, a chameleon or a black hat idk, for you YOUR RABBIT EARS AND A HEART BECAUSE I THINK THEY ARE CUTE!!!!

he would even "ask" you to use you as inspiration for any dessert, or drawing or smthn.

i bet if he haves a rabbit plushie he gives it to you and/or puts something on the ears(ribbons, little hats, etc) he would be like "bow bow!" [siblings!]

Black Hat

he probably threats to rip off your ears

and eat them

basically hurt you

DUDE HE IS LIKE THE ANTI CHRIST ON HIS UNIVERSE WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO DO TURN HIM INTO A ONCELER?

Penumbra

SHE

LOVES

YOUR

EARS

SHE OFTEN POSTS THINSG ON HER INSTAGRAM(with your consent ofc) LIKE "my sweetie's ears where a bit messy today! so me and sun blast fixed them just a lil bit.... loved the result! 🐇💜"

she would ask if you are sensitive to things like sound or something to try to not let a lot of hard things that can cause a hard sound when they fall or make sure Curie or Sunblast don't throw things

she oftenly tries to impulse you to not cover them! but if you like to have them covered, she would be okay with that too!

the same that flug

she would ask to make some little and non-offensive, experiments on your ears

if you don't want, its okay!

if you want, its okay too!

"look! i got you this! i bet it would make your ears fur brighter!..and curie's too"

Miss Heed

okay she would POST LIKE 10000 HISTORIES, POSTS, AND A LOT OF THINGS IN ALL HER SOCIAL MEDIA

LIKE SAYING "HAH MY s/O'S EARS ARE UNIQUE AND YOURS NOT"

but she would never say that out loud.

she would ask to records tiktoks or anything about them, like idk trends, popular songs or just quick vid like "watch me take care of my Sweetie S/o ears!"

if they are sensitive, during the event of when she had everybody under her control or smthn she would keep you away from them

yes she would be a bit sadistic and evil but she still cares abt you

..or she just does the same thing that she did with them..

when she's at..THAT place..she draws in a corner a lot of little ears, like if she misses you and misses your ears..

if you visit, she would beg to touch them again , to feel them..she would be crazy for it..

Sunblast

Red BEFORE the "The Dreadful Dawn".

Orange AFTER "The Dreadful Dawn" and BEFORE the events of the comic and The "Heedeous Heart"

Yellow AFTER "The Dreadful Dawn" and the events of "The Heedeous Heart" and the little comic

even if you where his S/O he would mock of you and of them..

listen he knows you are his S/O but he just..feels like its the right thing or it doesn't matters

he doesn't even minds as i can think

he is just like "oh i am just joking! geez.."

Now under Penumbra's uhm..how do i say it?..NOW WITH PENUMBRA LMAO

he realized that he may have been a bit too much harsh with you..

he persuades Penumbra to localize you or visit you to apologize

if things go well..you both could try again!

and he is better.

He even tries to make you be friends with Penumbra! like he did with her

He still makes jokes but he thinks about them for a long time like

"no..that would hurt their feelings..NO ITS BAD..well- no wait..no..oh...this one may be good.."

he fears of you getting like the other ones..he tries to protect you at all cost

if you do get under Miss heed's..thing

he would be like mad but that multiplicate it for 10 and then for 100

the only thing that keeps him away from hurting heed and all her followers its his current little size and Curie

when you aren't under heeds control he makes sure you and your ears are okay..

he asks everyday if you are 100% SURE IF YOU ARE OKAY

after the Miss heed thing he is worried more than he should be but like c'mon

leave the little guy alone :(

he lost 2 of his most special people in his life just because a pink bitch

[throneofsapphics]

manorian x reader, Reader and Dorian make Manon dress up for Halloween

ambush

Manorian x Reader

Warnings: none

A/N: lmao I love this, but idk if I'd have the courage to do it, here's a little drabble!

Manon glared at you and Dorian. You’d planned this ambush, or at least a few days thought into it. All of the mirrors were covered, courtesy of Dorian’s magic so she couldn’t see or rip any coverings away.

“It’s a holiday Manon.” You emphasized. 

“A stupid one.” 

Dorian held a hand up to his chest in mock offense. “You’re going to deny us our fun?” 

“There’s nothing fun about this.” 

“Don’t ruin my favorite holiday,” you pouted, crossing your arms. Dorian was fighting a laugh from behind her. Manon let out a noise of discontent and rolled her eyes before agreeing, making sure you both knew she wasn’t happy about this idea. You rubbed your hands together in glee, and she started looking rightfully worried. 

You gripped her shoulders lightly, directing her to a chair, and started working. 

“Close your eyes,” you insisted, grabbing some supplies to start painting her face. Those burnt gold eyes narrowed, but closed and you began. 

Dorian slipped behind her, pulling the headband down around her hair, you grabbed her wrists before she could pull it off - carefully angling your hands around the iron nails.

She let out an angry hiss as she looked into the mirror. “A cat?”  “You’re already acting the part.” Dorian said wryly. The snarl echoing through the room was enough to send you running, Dorian yelling traitor, at your back as Manon turned her attention on him.

[skxrbrand]

Was gonna wait until sunday to post this, but with my work schedule looking the way it's looking, Imma go ahead and do it now lmao. It IS spicy. Got some rust on my smut-skills, but I think it's serviceable. Ft. @alphabitchnkari's N'kari and my Skarb~

N'kari had returned.

From wherever he'd gone, for days and weeks, he'd returned. Skarbrand had felt it before his Heralds had informed him, before the sound of raucous celebration from the worshippers of Shornaal had reached his ear. And he had emerged from the peaceful dark of his chamber, first with the intent to hunt the Keeper down. But violence had turned into spite halfway through the trip and the Reaper found himself in the pit of Skulls, avoiding his wandersome ally-companion. Refusing to partake in the festivities, even to disrupt them.

Attention. The Slaaneshi thrived off of it and the Arch-Tempter was no different from his kin. He would notice the lack of Exile, as he would surely be expecting Skarbrand's rage, condemnation, scorn and malice yet would receive nothing. And he would take slight in that nothing; of all daemons, it was the Pleasure-kin who took offense the easiest. It was the Pleasurekin whose displeasure was the worst.

" You bring no skulls. No offerings." Skarbrand spoke as soon as felt N'kari was close enough to hear. There was nothing but the sound of claw on bone, peeling flesh, and the throwing of that wet flesh into piles.

" I did not think the great Skarbrand would care for mortal souvenirs." N'kari replied, leaned against the yawning mouth of the cavern. He looked relaxed, but in truth he was scanning, watching, waiting for the Reaper's mood to erupt. Of the Bloodthirster's raised hackles, stillness, and erect tail he had taken note. The Reaper was agitated.

" You reek of indulgence." Skarbrand growled. He turns, ears pinned back, eyes roiling with hatred. " You will not bring it here, into this sacred space."

The Reaper's isn't the only fiend who's patience is at it's end. He does not heed Skarbrand, striding into the cavern with confidence. The Bloodthirster is up immediately, practically throwing away his work to throw N'kari back out. But, with a gesture, the Keeper opens a portal beneath them both and they are back in Eight Tower-- the Reaper with a graceless thud. Skarbrand quickly recovers, lunging, but the Keeper sidesteps him. He exerts his will and bullies down the fury the Reaper has been surely nursing during their time apart.

" There. We are not in your precious skull cavern. Now, we can speak."

" I do not wish to speak. Or did my absences not tip you off?"

" Those absences are the very thing I wish to speak of. You have been avoiding me, beloved. And I wish to know why. Is there someone else?" The Keeper suggested laughingly, though the expression was only skin deep.

" Go back to your petty indulgences, N'kari. I am busy."

" Busy hiding? Skulking about in the shadows? Shaking in my absence like a cur in the rain?"

" And what have you been doing? Eating, drinking, whoring? Wasting time like your lot only knows how to do?"

The Keeper gave a small shrug. He would not argue his vices, for he was not ashamed of them. " Eating, yes. Drinking, yes. But not whoring. I have lain with no daemon since my return. I have desired no flesh but your own, yet you hide yourself from me." N'kari's voice took on a tone of concern, though there was edge too it. Skarbrand couldn't tell if it was anger or mock-pity or something else.

" Is this because of the...incident? Have I struck fear into you at last, beloved? Without axe or sword, only just the flesh of my body?" The Keeper asks, secretive, running his talons up one leg and thigh. Skarbrand stepped close, nearly snout to maw with the bent-down Keeper.

" You killed me. I had to stand before Kharneth because of you."

" So it is fear."

The Reaper stepped close again, this time involving his horns, which he locked with N'kari's. " I fear no flesh game." He held the jeweled gaze of the other daemon, willing himself not to look away as the Keeper took advantage of their closeness. Taloned hands cradled his face, pincer-arms wrapped about his shoulders, and the Arch-Tempter flickered his tongue.

It wasn't fear he tasted, but anger. Tinged with wariness. A hound whose faced the serpent's bite and was rightfully worried of facing it again. Skarbrand waits with cinched teeth and a set jaw. Despite everything, he wants to hear the Tempter's assessment.

" Show me, then. Grant me my final indulgence. I've been withholding for so long."

The Reaper feels rivulets of his blood run down his face from where talons have pricked his skin. He feels the hidden strength in the gentleness of the Keeper's pincer arms, locked around his shoulders. He is aware, all too aware, of the Tempter's needle-teeth so near to his soft nose. A part of him, sown over the months from their prolonged closeness, responds to the Keeper's proximity and upon realizing that, he almost pulls away. Almost. But what was that but retreat? A confirmation of the Keeper's accusations of fear?

N'kari's grin had to painful with how wide it was. It was always fun to watch the Reaper, a simple Khornate daemon, wrestle with such conundrums. What conclusion would he come to? Would the Keeper be savaged, carnally or with teeth in his throat? The anticipation makes the heady aroma wafting off his skin more potent and the Reaper's response to him all the more obvious.

The musk does it's work, but it is not the only thing making Skarbrand respond so. N'kari had seen it-- the subtle flicking of odd-colored eyes to his long talons, and pincer-claws, and teeth. The silent realization that any one of these could maim and rend the Reaper-- and some could kill him, just as N'kari's thighs had. The wordless, inflaming acknowledgement of the Arch-Tempter being a weapon and a fine one at that. It wouldn't last-- but it wouldn't be the last time the Reaper would come to the conclusion, either.

When the Reaper came to from his reverie, they were moving. N'kari was pushing him backward, his impatience overtaking his smugness. The much-abused Throne of Skulls is where they ended up, the Tempter making short work of the Bloodthirster's scant coverings. He licks up the hot daemon blood trailing a line down the Reaper's face and throws open the large metal door at the back of Skarbrand's chambers with a gesture, leading to the runway. A Keeper he might be, but the Arch-Tempter had no wish for this tryst to be a secret.

Skarbrand sees the meaning behind it immediately. N'kari wants them to know the Reaper had not strayed from his side. Let the gods themselves see; let Khorne seethe and Slaanesh be amused by the coupling! When he realizes, he cannot help the raw wave of loathing that bubbles up from his chest, even with the Tempter's expert stroking of his tenderest flesh.

" Q’tlhaga."

" Your Q’tlhaga, my sweet." N'kari replies. " And you are my Reaper."

The Exile hadn't believed N'kari when he had claimed to deny himself. After all, when did the Slaaneshi ever? But the impatient, hungry Keeper had abandoned his hand for his body soon enough, the heat of palm replaced by the wet heat of sex. Stroking hands became rolling hips and the pace the Keeper set was at once smooth and brutal. A creature starved for flesh and finally allowed to feed.

He felt the Keeper's tail curl around him, lower from where they join, wrapping about his balls. A lance of recollection grips him just as tightly. It's going to be a long, exhausting night. A night of being brought to the brink over and over, but denied release. The Reaper's hand lashed out, sinking into N'kari's shoulder and pulling him down. His teeth follow, burying deep into the purple fiend. The Tempter will not be the only creature fed by flesh this day, a sentiment he scars across the moaning echoes of N'kari's thoughts. But the sharpness of Skarbrand's fangs and the burn of his oily black saliva are just more notes in a song of sensation to the Slaaneshi.

The Reaper doesn't intend for this night to be that night. He is no spoil of war, to be used at whim, and he shows N'kari that; pushing through the bone-quaking pleasure-pain of stuttering legs and rising from the bone throne. He flips them, lifting the taller daemon and all but slamming him into the dais. The throne creaks beneath the assault; skulls break away, cracking on the floor and shattering under hoof as the Reaper comes forward. He pulls N'kari around him, into him, and sets his own pace, spearing the Keeper into his seat of power.

" Do you taste fear?" The Reaper asks growling pants. " Perhaps it is your own ."

N'kari crows a laugh, even over breathy pleasure. He crosses long legs across Skarbrand's back. " Whatever pleases you to believe, beloved." He says and earns another bite, another hunk of flesh torn from his neck. Pain. The point of the provocation, likely. The Tempter responds his kind: his tail squeezes the Bloodthirster's jewels, and the Reaper crumples atop him, bloody-mouthed and warbling. As if in apology, squeezing turns into massaging.

" That was mean." N'kari comments, though Skarbrand senses no true hurt. " Do not forget, Reaper. I can take these -- " The tail gives two pointed squeezes " -- from you at anytime."

" And your throat is well within range of my teeth, Tempter. You have slain me. The flesh and blood I take is a merciful recompense."

" Touché." The Keeper allows. His hands roam, wandering the hard, muscular plains of the Reaper's body and lingering on old scars and wounds. Skarbrand gathers himself, pushing himself to his hands and knees. It makes N'kari sneer. " Shall I turn around and we mate like hounds in season?"

" Shield your jugular, you mean."

" Is my back not just as appealing as my throat?"

" Your back is hard chitin and sharp pincers."

Skarbrand maintains. He press his weight onto N'kari's shoulders and somewhat clumsily slides himself back into the Keeper. The Tempter shudders; Skarbrand is unwieldy-- thick, ridged, long and aflare with arousal and fury. His Pincers do indeed come up, looming over the Exile like a guillotine. One well-placed strike and that could be the Reaper's head. The fact of it doesn't dissuade Skarbrand; if anything, N'kari feels the iron of the Exile's claws eat deeper into flesh and his cock ravage him even more ferociously, as if rising to the implied threat.

A thrumming growl hums at the back of Skarbrand's throat. A threat, a dare. His eyes flick between the two be-weaponed limbs a few times, before settling on the grinning Keeper. N'kari's eyes are bright with interest and excitement. " Grinning fool. Perhaps I should have flipped you over." He curses in a strained voice. N'kari hears it too and knows what it means. The end is close, but the Tempter isn't ready for the game to be over.

His tail constricts and the Reaper tenses and yanks the Keeper into him by the hips; the end does not come. There is no spend-- only the Tempter's slickness and blood; both his and N'kari's. But no burning Khornate seed. The smile N'kari gives is cruel and he takes advantage of the Reaper's momentary boneless to put himself back in the Bloodthirster lap, sitting on him like a wrangler on a broken bull.

" This game has a while yet to run, little Khornate." The Keeper purred, giving the throbbing Bloodthirster a few soft tugs. Skarbrand snorted, grimacing as he witnessed the Arch-Tempter sample the mess on his palm, then growling as the heat of the other daemon again swallowed him. N'kari flit his tongue, leaning over his partner.

" Are you afraid?"

Skarbrand showed the Tempter his teeth. His hands, still bearing much of their strength, locked around the curve of the Keeper's hips.

" I fear no flesh game."

[fkinavocado]

So, Cricket World Cup is going on, I live and breathe that game lol and I happen to have a massive crush on this cricketer, he is quite literally the 🐐 of the game and on 23rd he played the greatest knock of his career in front of 90,000+ spectators in Australia, and it changed the whole trajectory of my life, I am suddenly a way more positive and fun person than I was before I witnessed that magic 🤣 and my fiance who is also a massive fan of the game has started showing signs of jealously with my celebrity crush,because I gush on him so much lmao. I love when my fiance gets jealous, it makes him hotter.

So, I was wondering if Y/N has a celebrity crush. Maybe some actor? What if she is watching some movie on a weekend with Harry and happens to have a crush on the lead actor (childhood celeb crush) I am pretty sure it will not go well with DI Harry 🤣🤣 I am dying to see his reaction, I am sure even if she is not as crazy as I am, he will still not like the idea of her gushing on another man celeb or not.

harry grimaced when you suggested it "a musical? i don't know..."

"oh come on, that's not the point. it's supposed to be a really good movie! got a ton of oscars"

you watched him mull it over while he was waiting for the popcorn to pop, and then just decided to search for la la land on netflix since he wasn't exactly saying no to your proposition, either.

he finally made his way to the couch and sat on his designated spot, waiting for you to cuddle into his side before pulling the throw blanket over you. he never used it himself, he was kind of a living breathing furnace, but you- you were always cold.

he then placed the popcorn bowl on his lap and finally glanced at the tv and scoffed "oh, alright. i see how this is"

you pouted "I mean, you didn't say no to it, so i just decided to search for it but we can watch something else, harry. it's fine"

"not what i meant" he singsonged to himself and you pulled away a bit, inspecting his features

"what are you on about?"

harry raised an eyebrow at you and smirked at your apparently genuine confusedness "you gonna act all innocent? like you're picking this movie for any other reason than the male lead?"

"the wha-- what, ryan gosling? you think i picked this movie 'cause he stars in it?"

"i mean, he was in that movie we went to see back home. the one you tricked me into watching"

you stared at him, mouth agape in mock offense "i did not! may i remind you, you surprised me and took me to see the notebook"

"ah! but i didn't know it'd be the notebook, did i?"

you squinted your eyes at him "your point?"

harry shrugged and began picking at the kernels "'m just saying. you got a crush on him or summat?"

you let out an incredulous laugh "are you serious right now?"

harry sighed dramatically "just play the movie. i'll allow it. no kink shaming in this house"

"as i live and breathe..." you beamed

"--before i change my mind."

"you're actually jealous"

"...these need more salt"

"you're adorable" you kissed the corner of his mouth and settled back into his side

"mhm. this guy better work his charm because i'm not wasting any time on foreplay afterwards" he then kissed the top of your head tenderly, a stark contrast to the tone of his voice and his heated warning

you bit your lower lip, swallowing a comeback. instead you whispered loud enough for him to hear over the opening credits "yes, daddy"

Daddy issues- Masterlist

[leviackermanscleaningbuddy]

Hi hi!! I have an ask for the pack! I feel like you’ve answered a question similar to this but I’m not sure, so ignore this if you have LMAO

I am dying to know if the boys are more tits or ass men when it comes to (Y/n) 😭 like who buried their head in her chest even if it isn’t sexual just cuz they love how it feels that much 😭 (I feel as though I already know what Minho’s answer would be)

Anyways, I LOVE your writing and your SKZ!Pack series is honestly my favorite thing on tumblr! Much love! <3

"Sorry it took so long for us to get around to answering questions again." Chan rubs at the back of his neck, an apologetic expression pulling at his lips. "We had to consider our answers for this one in particular."

"Psh. No we didn't." Changbin scoffs, and Chan shoots him a halfhearted glare. The other alpha smirks. "We all know our answers to this question. And so does everyone else."

"Be nice to Channie." You berate teasingly, trying your very best to keep your face straight. "You know he's scared of girls."

Jisung cackles and Hyunjin rolls his eyes. "Coulda fooled us all then. Changbin-hyung never made a move on him cause he was terrified Chan-hyung was straight as a stick."

"I was not!" Changbin protests instantly and the omegas titter amongst themselves with amusement.

Hyunjin continues without mercy.

"And then we had to listen to him complain for hours about Chan 'working him like a slave driver' when in reality he had the biggest crush in existence on his mentor and studio buddy, but was too scared to do anything about it."

"That's not true!" Changbin protests again, weaker this time, knowing he's fighting a losing battle.

"Really? Isn't it?" You give him your most innocent stare. "Because I seem to remember you offering me up as his girlfriend before you even let the man speak."

"That was self preservation!" Changbin exclaims with exasperation, looking entirely too tired for this conversation.

"How is that self preservation?" Jisung interrupts, looking so gleeful it borders on wicked. "Noona was ready to murder you. And honestly, I'd be more scared of her than Chan-hyung anyday." He holds out a placating hand toward the head alpha. "No offense, hyung."

Chan shakes his head with an accepting little smile. "None taken. I get it."

"Okay back on topic-" Seungmin pulls everyone back to focus, the annoyance clear in the nasal of his tone.

"Try to suspend your fear of the female species for just a few moments, Christopher." Minho remarks offhandedly, a smirk pulling at his lips, as he glances at the head alpha.

Chan rolls his eyes. "Everyone just answer the question."

You sit back in your chair with a satisfied, eager air. "This is gonna do wonders for my self confidence."

"Oooh I'll go first." Jeongin rubs his hands together, looking you up and down slowly, his tongue darting out to wet his lips, as if he's a predator sizing up his prey.

It's not even remotely scary, and way too adorable.

"Tits. It's not even a contest."

"Yeah, because you're a baby." Jisung grumbles, trying to get a rise out the omega.

It doesn't work.

Minho mock gasps at the youngest's use of language and makes a move to cuff his ear, which the grinning Jeongin dodges easily.

"Who taught you that language?"

"Jisungie-hyung obviously."

Minho turns his death stare on Jisung, who suddenly looks a whole lot less jovial, and a whole lot more contrite.

"Sorry, hyung."

The beta accompanies the apology with a shrug, which takes away from the sincerity, but it seems to placate Minho, at least for the moment.

"Fine." The alpha sighs a long breath through his nose. "I'm an ass man. Obviously."

"Butt hunter winner every single year in a row." Hyunjin nods seriously, biting back a smile.

"He's also really good at spanking." Jisung pipes up, looking slightly haunted, as if he can feel Minho's phantom handprint stinging on his skin right now. "That shit hurts."

Minho shrugs. "I've been working out."

"Um, excuse me." You interrupt teasingly. "Can we come back to me please?"

"I am also an ass man." Changbin volunteers, raising his hand, with a smirk in your direction.

"You definitely are." You agree immediately with a slight laugh. "Why else would you buy me leggings and make me go to the gym with you? I'm pretty sure I'm not that great of a workout buddy."

Changbin grins and winks. "Guilty."

"I, on the other hand, am a tits-" Jisung starts to say, but quickly backtracks when Minho levels him with a glare powerful enough to kill. "-boobs man. Who wouldn't want to squish those things between their hands and bury their face in them?"

"My breasts and I are always at your disposal." You grin at the beta, and he looks sufficiently touched.

"Thank you, noona. That's the sweetest thing you've ever said to me."

"I'm also on team boobs." Felix looks thoughtful, and everyone turns to him in surprise. He shrugs under the attention, giving the other pack members a knowing smile. "Why is that shocking? I mean, besides sexually, they're super comfortable, like built in pillows, and I like how comforting and soft and warm they are when noona hugs me."

"Ah, baby." You coo at the adorableness of the omega. "You're also a bottom though. So you get a pretty good view when they're in your face all the time. So I'm gonna say that has also biased you."

Jisung cackles again and Felix flushes a bright red, but he doesn't deny it.

"I'm an ass kind of guy." Hyunjin remarks, slinging his arm around Seungmin, who nods in agreement.

"Me too."

"It's just nice to have something to look at? And like, noona has a nice ass, okay, it jiggles just the right amount, and I get why Minho-hyung always slaps asses now. And I used to dance, so the trained eye is drawn to a nice physique."

Everyone turns to Chan now, who has been sitting silently since the beginning of the conversation.

"Do you feel ready now, Christopher?" Minho asks, deadpan, but you can tell he's teasing, poking. "Ready to talk about women and their alien, scary parts?"

Chan sighs heavily and rolls his eyes.

"Oh my god. I hate you all."

You grin and lean your chin on his shoulder, pressing a kiss to the underside of his jaw.

"No you don't. Now answer the question. Inquiring minds need to know."

"I am-" Chan sighs, looking like he regrets answering this already. "-a boobs leaning man." He holds up a hand, as if knowing the younger members are going to interrupt and burst into chaos at his admission. "I like asses too, but there's something about-"

The tips of his ears go red, and he sighs again, and you bite back a smile, because you can tell he's physically suffering.

He goes on.

"-about being able to cup something, while you're doing certain activities? It appeals to my primal brain I guess."

Minho slow claps. "Well done, Christopher. We're all very proud."

Chan sighs so hard you think he's going to dislocate something.

You can't resist teasing him a little.

"He also likes to leave marks on them. You know. Because he's Chan."

Chan groans from beside you, shooting you a betrayed look, and the younger pack members-free now from under the head alpha's stern gaze-immediately lose their shit.

"Oh my god, hyung, I can't believe I never thought of that!"

"Boobs just suddenly became a whole lot more appealing."

"You can leave ass marks too. Trust me. And it's just as satisfying. Bite into that sucker like a fucking apple."

"Double oh my god, I've never thought of that either!"

Chan leans in to your space and mutters forlornly beneath his breath to you, "Why do you hate me?"

You laugh and press a kiss to his cheek. "I don't. On the contrary, I love you."

Around you, the debate is still evolving.

"Changbin-hyung, when you thought Chan-hyung was straight, did you take him for a boobs man?"

"Of course he did! Why else do you think he was ridiculously into hyung of all people? Look at the double d's on the man himself! He knew he'd be into him, even if just for the Biddies!"

Chan shrugs now, glancing across the room to Changbin, letting his gaze linger a little longer than necessary on the other alpha's toned chest. "I mean. They're not wrong."

Changbin sighs like his soul has left his body, and the cause is Han Jisung.

[gaycrittercentral]

Hopefully this will brain running  and give you enough energy until the end of the shift 



Instead of the seven sins for Max  how about the seven heavenly virtues for Sam?

( optional  what do you think they do if the seven sins of max meet the heavenly virtues of Sam )

Oh shit dude that’s SO GOOD FJKDLFJKSLJDSKFJS I gotta get out the laptop for this one >:D ok so the seven heavenly virtues (as defined by Wikipedia, anyhow) are sort of opposites of the seven deadly sins, or at least you can interpret them that way. In no particular order they are Kindness, Diligence, Patience, Temperance, Charity, Humility, and Chastity. And HOOOOOO BOY do I have ideas for them I been thinkin about this all night!!

This is gonna get long, obviously, so the rest is under the cut.

First off I just want to discuss how I interpret this concept in general, as well as some potential circumstances that could lead to it happening. As far as I see it, the seven deadly sins are really just normal behaviors taken to the extreme, which can be healthy in moderation; therefore, the heavenly virtues are the same thing but in the opposite direction. They’re values that are good and helpful until you start placing too much emphasis on them and overdoing it, and then they’re harmful to you. Separated from all other aspects of Sam’s personality, many of them are honestly pretty unhealthy despite being so-called virtues.

As for how they could’ve come into existence, either we’re looking at some kind of bizarre dark version of Hugh Bliss who wants to eat all the bad emotions people experience (lol wonder what he'd be like) or, as I feel is easier to implement, he decided to pluck out all Sam’s virtues so they could go spread his bliss in the world and what’s left of Sam won’t want to help Max defeat Bliss anymore. I’m gonna call the remaining part of him sinful Sam I guess \_:p_/ for that matter, let’s talk about him first!

Sinful Sam (or just sin Sam bc that sounds funny to me)

Without any of his usual kindness, patience and good humor, Sam is kind of like his noir self on steroids. At first Max is like “oh shit Sam with no limits!! Ooooooh this is gonna be fun!” but then sin Sam immediately starts insulting him and growling at him and demonstrating a total lack of care and concern and Max is like “oh. actually you suck like this let’s go get those stupid virtues >:/” Sin Sam is quick to anger, quick to violence, all too happy to steal things in plain view of people, pretty egotistical, impatient, and just plain rude. He’s like if you took all of Sam’s usual personality and then sucked the humor out of it so he really just means every awful thing he says. He might even get to curse for real ooooh but maybe Hugh Bliss bleeps all of it so every other sentence is just furious beeping and Max gasping in mock offense. He also has lost his affection for pretty much everyone and everything, including Max, so he’s annoyed with him the whole time they’re getting his virtues back. Although, since he’s basically every deadly sin at once, he did get to keep lust and he might flirt with Max just a little. Max is reeeeally hoping they get enough of a break at some point to have a really violent hate-fueled makeout sesh lmao (they probably won’t and he is going to be so heartbroken over it).

Now, as for the virtues themselves…

Temperance (liver)

Temperance is basically the concept of moderation and self-restraint, so if we’re doing comparisons to the sins, it’s probably closest to being the opposite of gluttony. I think he’s on board with the idea of reclaiming all Sam’s virtues from the get go, because what’s more moderate than reuniting all parts of your soul? But maybe you have to collect a few of the others before he’ll rejoin the party since sinful Sam is just so unpleasant. He doesn’t want to be the only one stuck with all those vices, y’know? He’s also probably the closest to Sam’s real personality, although a little bland and very indecisive. Since he agrees with the concept of putting them all back together, Max tries to recruit him to help, but he’s just like “Hmm. Well, part of me wants to help you…and part of me doesn’t. Let me think about it for a while…” and basically he never decides one way or another and keeps flinging Max away whenever he tries to brute force it. Maybe you just get him a coin to flip in the end and once it lands on heads he concedes and allows Max to take whatever part of Sam he’s got. Honestly I’m not sure what part that would be—maybe his liver lmao, since it’s responsible for alcohol management and all that. That’s kind of temperance, right?

Patience (tail)

Probably closest to the opposite of wrath? I feel like Patience is just meditating in a quiet room somewhere looking peaceful and cannot be moved or bothered in any way. Max can attack him and chew on him and insult him all he wants but nothing gets a proper response, even if you ask sinful Sam to yell at him or punch him (he yelps and shakes his hand out like “god DAMN that hurt >:’(”). The guy's as stoic as a stone. Maybe he gets Sam’s tail, which makes it a problem that he’s sitting cross-legged and can’t be persuaded to get up. All he says to Max is maddeningly calm stuff like “Not yet, Max,” or “All in good time, good buddy.” I think he’s the last one to be collected because he just waits until you have all the others and then gets up like “:) ok it’s time now.”

Charity (left ear)

Opposite of greed, obviously. Charity is HYSTERICAL to me oh my god ok here’s my concept for him; the minute he pops into existence, he hands Max a random item from Sam’s inventory delightedly and then runs off to give away every single item they’ve collected so far and even all their case memorabilia from the office. You find him by following the trail of people he’s ‘donated’ things to and reclaiming your items, until you finally track him down and Max asks for his ear back, to which he’s just like “oh sure! Here you go!” and pulls it right off his head, looking sort of surprised when he abruptly pops out of existence. Afterwards, sin Sam is like “Oh that’s good to have back I guess. I feel less stingy now…I’m still keeping this stuff, though.”

Diligence (right hand)

Diligence is sort of the opposite of sloth; it’s the concept of working hard, constantly. It’s like the main thing that led to capitalism lmao. I think he gets Sam’s right hand. He instantly takes off to go to work arresting as many criminals as possible, and by the time you track him down he claims to have taken all the muggers and whatnot in the area into custody and is just filling out a huge stack of paperwork for their arrests. To me he’s like if you took all the angst out of Noir Sam and left him as a workaholic shell of his former self jfkdljfhdfsd. He’s so focused on doing his job that Max just can’t get to him. He probably has to commit a crime to get Diligence's attention so he can fight him and get the hand back lmao. Once Sam gets him back he comments, “That’s funny. I suddenly feel like I have the will to power through that paperwork we’ve been putting off for three weeks.” And Max is just like “Oh, good! Somebody has to and it’s not gonna be me lmao”

Chastity (left hand)

Opposite of lust! I know it’d made sense to give him Sam’s heart, but instead I'm giving him Sam's left hand so we can make a joke about asking for his hand in marriage lmao. And I’m gonna be so honest right now, I love a shy Sam so I’m just dumping all of that onto him shkfljdlfshfs. He’s probably just sitting quietly and reading a book or something, and he hides behind it with a little squeak when he sees Max. He’s all blushy and shit lmaoooo, sinful Sam hates his ass. If Max tries to get near him to grab Sam's hand back he gets all flustered and insists they wait til marriage or something ridiculous (reminding him that they're already married does no good, he insists they have to do it again. ok gayass). Maybe they have to put on a quick wedding so he’ll let Max near him lmao. Maybe he’s hanging out at Sybil’s and they can recruit her to marry them since she’s queen of Canada and probably has that kind of power, right? When she says to kiss the groom, Chastity gives Max the lamest, most timid little cheek smooch ever (sinful Sam gags lol). Max takes the opportunity to shock him with a dip and a proper kiss before yanking his hand off lmao. Afterwards, Max goes, “Wait, are you gonna be a prude now? Did I just miss my window for crazy, kinky hate sex?” and sin Sam’s like “well…that does seem a bit much. Maybe something a little more vanilla?” “oh god DAMNIT”

Humility (right eye)

Opposite of pride, and honestly, kind of an embodiment of Sam’s lack of self worth. Pride is healthy until it turns into a braggy, ego kind of thing, and on the flip side, humility is helpful until it turns into negative self-talk, doubting yourself, and downplaying your own value. Max finds Humility locked in Bosco’s restrooms, having taken shelter there to read self-help books and try to ‘fix’ himself. When Max asks why he didn’t pick someplace less gross, he mumbles something like “It’s where somebody like me deserves to be.” Sinful Sam just shoots back, “Yeah, well, would you either get better already or find a gutter to wallow in instead? Some of us need to take a leak.” Max laughs instinctively and then scolds sin Sam when they hear Humility sniffle a little. You can try a couple different dialogue options to get him to come out of the bathroom, like an emotional appeal: “C’mon, Sam, you’re not all that bad! And honestly, I like when you are bad! I mean, this guy out here might be getting on my nerves but he’s also a real heartthrob.” Sin Sam eyes him and goes, “…Noted.” But Humility just insists that he’s imperfect and full of sin and needs to keep working on himself before he deserves to be around Max. You can also try the practical approach. “Seriously, though, ya can’t stay in there all day. I mean, what if I need to pee?” “You deserve a cleaner bathroom anyway :(“

Maybe you end up getting him back by just giving sinful Sam a bunch of cups of coffee until eventually he’s like “Ok that’s it, I’ve had it” and kicks down the bathroom door, throws Humility out, and props the door back up so he can piss lmao. Max wastes no time in cornering Humility, although he might take a second to be like “Sam, get this through your dense, bizarrely-shaped skull—I like you, and I think you’re a pretty good guy, and you don’t have to be perfect. That’ll probably be easier to believe once you get back with the more reasonable parts of you, but just trust me for now, ok?” Humility just kinda sniffles and goes “ok :’(“ and lets Max reunite him with the rest of himself. Sam comes back out of the bathroom with his other ear intact and goes “Yikes. I feel like I need a couple dozen therapy sessions.” “Yay! Attaboy, Sammy!”

And lastly, maaaaaybe my favorite—Kindness! (heart)

I guess kindness is kind of the opposite of envy?? Idk these comparisons get a little blurry after a while. Anyway, kindness and the ways in which it can be harmful is a topic near and dear to my soul because it’s something I struggle with a lot (along with every other people pleaser on the planet, I imagine). I feel obligated to try to be as friendly and helpful as I possibly can 24/7 and really guilty when I feel like I haven’t given my all, and obviously that’s not healthy. Sooo that’s the cliff notes for this poor boy lmao.

Max finds Kindness volunteering at a charity place or something, all cheerful and happy-go-lucky. The minute he sees Max he gasps delightedly and rushes over to greet him all excited, immediately swooping him up in a hug and licking his cheek. Max responds with the usual performative disgust and demands to be released, but instead of teasing him like Sam normally would, Kindness just goes “Ok! Sorry, buddy :)” and sets him back down. Weird, but whatever. Max tells him to hand over the heart, but Kindness insists that he can be much more helpful without all those other vices and virtues weighing him down, and he’s got a lot more good to do before he can rest. Asking sin Sam to restrain him doesn’t help because Kindness tries to hug anybody who gets near him and sin Sam is just like “oh HELL no I’m not touching that guy.” Through talking with him as he keeps handing out lunches or whatever, it becomes clear that Kindness has been helping everyone in sight with everything he can, giving away all his time and energy and completely neglecting himself; he gave his lunch away to someone who he thought needed it more and now he feels lightheaded, he’s been listening to people’s problems and probably taking on more stress than he’s really able to handle, and he’s so focused on making Max comfortable and taking care of him that he doesn’t argue when Max or sin Sam do anything that would normally bother him. Like Max could bite him and he’d be like “Ow! Oh, I’m sorry, do you need a chew toy, buddy? You can keep using my arm if you like!” even though he’s clearly in pain. Maybe sin Sam accuses him of being a masochist and he just chirps, “Oh, I’m not :)” which is honestly more worrisome because if you don’t like pain, why do you keep allowing people to hurt you?

Eventually Max gets fed up with him ignoring his own needs and hatches a plan, saying he needs help with something back at the office. Kindness comes along happily, obviously. Max tells him to sit on the couch and relax while he grabs some snacks and coffee. The whole time, he has to keep insisting that Kindness stay seated instead of jumping back up to help. Eventually he grabs Kindness by the shoulders to explain that having his partner as, essentially, a self-offered indentured servant is funny and all, but it’s making him uncomfortable. They work so well together because they’ve always been equal, and as high and mighty as Max likes to act sometimes, it feels bad to just keep taking everything from his best friend and to be unable to give anything back. In a dreadfully ironic twist, preventing Max (and others, by extension) from doing anything for him is sort of unkind in and of itself. “So just keep your ass seated and let me do what I need to do, okay? You’re stressing me out. Eat your donut and calm down already.” And Kindness, maybe a little starry-eyed, finally concedes and allows Max to grab a blanket and finish making them some coffee. Once that’s done they sit on the couch together under the blanket for a minute and watch some junk TV while they eat a much-needed snack (by the way, sin Sam has long since escaped this mushiness and is probably staring longingly at Flint Paper’s door or something. Ah, Flint Paper...). After a few minutes of that, Max ventures, “Sooo…can I get that heart now, or…?” “Aw, buddy. You know you already have it.” And with a final little side hug, which Max finally returns with only a little grumbling about how sappy it is, he poofs out of existence. Sin Sam pops back in after a second like “Max, I need to apologize. I feel like I yelled at you a lot today and I really don’t know where that came from. You ok, little pal?” “lol yeah it was funny” “oh! ok then. You gonna eat the rest of that donut?”

I don’t know if there’s a particular order they get taken care of in, besides Patience going last. I figure in the spirit of the games you could really get them in whatever order you like. And I don’t have colors for everybody yet, but I feel like Chastity matches well with a soft pastel pink and Kindness is kind of a warm dandelion yellow. As for interactions with Max’s vices, oof, I should probably make that a different post since this one got so long ^^; But hoooooo boy I’m def gonna write it up!! These things are super fun to think about and I feel honored to be the first person I’ve seen put out some thoughts about them. Thanks so much for the prompt dude!! And ummm if anybody would like to ask anything else about this funky little concept I would be all too happy to answer teehee

(Oh also I’m definitely gonna draw them! But that’s gonna take a second so I figured I’d just post this while I’ve got it and put up some sketches of ‘em later, especially since they don’t come across that well without color and that’s gonna take even longer. I’m SO excited though hfjkldshfkdlsjfhsk)

[notyouraryang0dd3ss]

The post Malone tattoos are so “welcome to my twisted mind” The people in the comments who are like “they’re not bad they’re his tattoos” They look like shit on him too! And he’s an idiot for going anywhere near her! The whole song is “I’m so crazy 🤪🤪 look at my crazy new look in the asylum” Gurl!! It’s such a bad concept with worse imagery but why is post Malone there!! Idgaf about him or his music but it feels like she’s mocking him and using him as a prop in her offensive low budget haunted house looking Joker skit lmao

this has me giggling dkfnfjfkdnskdjf

tbh i think any artist who collabs w her is in it for the check even if it makes no sense. like there was no reason laverne cox needed to be in the "You Need To Calm Down" MV or for her to have a collab with kendrick lamar. like it's truly just the $$$ talking

i refuse to watch this mv so thank you for summarising it! i thought she was done with her edgelord bullshit during her Reputation era but I guess she's giving every era of hers a renaissance so...

she really is so shameless in her art. nothing is off limits for her to absorb and exploit as art, its distasteful. but also post malone is random as hell you're right. but it seems to be like another way she's trying to expand her reach - she tried and failed with the ice spice/karma remix but this seems to be another attempt.

but post malone?????? LMAO

[dearweirdme]

I came across a tiktok live of a jikooker last night debunkung all of taekook's sightings and hangouts. She said the atomix was a group dinner and was confirmed by a staff. The paradise hotel was with Jn since Jn was friends with the owner of the hotel. The movie premier was not a private thing since there were media everywhere. I couldn't listen to the rest anymore. The OP blocked me after I called her out. She was mocking Tae and Tkkrs in particular. She sounded like she had her speech written down.

When you said that jkkrs live off of lies and made up stories, this is what you meant I guess. I can't remember a staff confirming it was a group dinner at Atomix. Even if it was a group dinner, the fact that JK chose to post his photo with Tae instead of the ones with Jimin or the group I guess says a lot. The narratives that they have to instill in their minds just to convince themselves that jikook are real are friggin ridiculous! The OP was so proud, like a student, reciting her assignment in front of the class. lmao! There were over a hundred jikookers who were on that live. Crazy!

Now jikookers are working with blinks and tns to sabotage Tae. How insecure can they be? If they truly believe in their ship, there's no need to debunk taekook. They're only friends and co-workers, right? Why are they seething? Could it be that they're starting to believe taekook could be something more? lol They have their MS, why are they still inserting Tae in their narratives as if it's their duty to broadcast to the whole world that Tae is the thorn in Jikook's relationship. If only they'd step back a little and watch what they're doing, they'd be embarrass of themselves.

Hi anon!

There are always these shippers around who make it more about them being right, than about what the truth actually is. I suspect you will find them in all corners of fandom.. including Tkkrs, but we ofcourse often pick up on Jkkrs acting this way... I mean, I literallly have them screaming in my inbox about how delusional I am right now.

I wouldn't even necessarily call it lying, since they themselves actually quite often believe what they are saying. It's more.. a denial of truth, or a lack of understanding human behavior, mixed up with a tendency to not look beyond Jk and Jm's moments? They need an explanation for Tae and Jk to not be as close as they seem, so they grasp onto anything that makes it look less than what it actually is. It is a sort of desparation, because if Jk and Jm were actually together.. who would even give a shit about Tae being close to Jk.

It's very much a problem they have with us, they can't stand the idea of us being right. So much so, that they take offense to even the smallest interaction Jk and Tae have. They are so worried about being wrong, that they prefer to think of Tae badly instead of wondering if maybe they themselves are the ones who are mistaken.

[let-us-cultivate-our-garden]

have you read (ugh) Harry Potter and if so how do you compare it to TOH ( also let’s burn Rowling at a stake lmao)

I grew up with Harry Potter so it was a pretty big part of my childhood. It was a fun, fantasy series that inspired millions of children worldwide and had a considerable impact on children's literature. Given its popularity and position in the zeitgeist, it was inevitable that people would be inspired by it, analyze it, criticize it, mock it, etc.

Now I haven't read HP in a long time and it's been a hot minute since I've watched the movies but I think I remember enough. It's also difficult (and probably unfair) to compare TOH and HP because one has 7 books in which to expand its lore and characters while the former only had effectively 2 1/2 seasons. But let's try any way. This got long so there will be more after the cut:

The Owl House is a structurally flawed show and it has a glaring blindspot in how its poc characters are treated but at least it doesn't have offensive tropes such as Jewish-coded goblins and elves who are happy to be slaves.

TOH's biggest strength is probably the likability of its characters and how easy it is to project onto them; Eda is the fun and sassy mentor but struggles with a terrible curse that many people read as a metaphor for chronic illness. Luz is your typical kid protagonist who is curious, excitable, and struggled to fit in at school. Amity was the perfectionist bully but secretly has a soft side. These are all good archetypes for your characters and it's easy to see why they're appealing.

On the other hand, I feel like HP's biggest strength is its world building: Hogwarts feels like a place the reader can step into as do Knockturn Alley, Gringotts, Grimauld Place, the Burrow, 2 Privet Drive, etc. The fact that I can still name all of these places shows the culture impact HP had and just how immersive the books were (and of course, how the movies brought them to life).

I think a big part of this is how HP incorporates magic into its universe: Hogwarts has the moving staircases, a ghost haunting the girl's toilet, floating candles in the Great Hall, the magic makes the setting come alive. When Harry said that Hogwarts was his home, many readers felt the same way.

When I think of the Boiling Isles, I think of how small it feels; there's Hexside, the Emperor's Castle, and the titular Owl House but aside from the last one, none of these places really stand out design wise or even emotionally. Hexside is just another fantasy school except with teeth, and the Castle is just a generic evil overlord castle. And the Owl House only stands out because of Hooty, without him, it's just another house.

As for the magic itself?

Well, the magic in TOH is really inconsistent, especially the glyphs. Here's a post that goes in depth on how poorly the glyphs were incorporated into the show. It's also not terribly creative with its magic: Willow is a plant witch but we only ever see her attack with vines and Gus' Illusion magic is explored in one, maybe two episodes. The only new element that is interesting is Abomination magic, which looks cool but it's basically water bending with goo.

For a show set in another world, it doesn't really do much to distinguish itself from Earth outside of the aesthetics; there's social media, movies, a job fair, and people treat covens like college degrees (which has enormous implications for how poorly done the EC is). It doesn't feel like you're in another world and I think a big part of that is the lack of whimsy in the show.

When Harry Potter explored the castle, the reader did as well, and we were just as amazed and impressed as he was. As Harry explored the wizarding world and all of its creatures and inhabitants, that sense of whimsy and awe never faded. I never got that sense of whimsy when Luz was exploring the Boiling Isles, it felt too similar to home.

If the show had spent more time in season 1 establishing its tone and identity instead of making fun of HP or fantasy tropes in general then we wouldn't have this problem. Hexside is especially guilty of this: look! here's our Parody Sorting Hat! check out our broom game that has nonsensical rules! take that Harry Porber!

As it stands, TOH looks good on paper but it botches the execution of its interesting ideas and concepts. I can see why so many people love it though because some of the things the characters go through are Relatable but for me, I've seen all of this done before and better in other media. If it came out years ago, perhaps it would have left a bigger mark on me, but in the end, TOH has very nice designs but it's undercooked.