#the only way b7 is allowed to end

[agisleepy]

When the local Ultra SSR character takes over the entire island, forces everyone to sleep, is on the verge of causing a worldwide disaster if not stopped and bcuz of that your Mom goes through your computer

[deepperplexity]

Prompt: 20. Returning Home [B7]

Pairing: Snape x Fem!OC

POV: Third, Snape

Setting: Unknown place during a blizzard

Continuation of: Prompt 2. Restless Waiting, 3. Snowballing, 7. Stormy Reunion,  8. Rosemary For Holly, 16. Keep Warm & 19. Hope

A/N: Let's get right back at it with our dear Severus and Belinna, gosh, what a state we left them in yesterday 👀

Tags/TW’s: Love/Happiness/Life, Grief, Losing All Hope, Giving Up, Battle Of Hogwarts, Snape Lives, Slight Draco Redemption Hints, Muggle Medicine, Crossing Muggle Life And Wizarding Life, Reunion(s), Going Back Home, Asking For Help, Fear, Blood, Hospital

Word Count: 3.3k

LINKTREE // AO3 // MASTERLIST

⩤• Severus •⩥

The day he showed his most sacred place to her, he lost her. The days blurred together, a week turning into a month, the months into a year until the war arrived. Not one moment had passed when Belinna wasn’t on his mind one way or another, only hiding the memories, dreams, and heartache to present the Dark Lord with the memory of her in his arms as he cried in true despair — making the man believe her to be dead. In a sense, she was. There was never a future to be had between the two. Severus wasn’t foolish enough to delude himself into such false hopes and follies.

What he had done, to keep her safe, was to sacrifice the last chance at any form of happiness or love during his miserable life. He’d enjoyed her from afar, allowed his eyes to wander over her and his mind to have a second or two of false hope — but that was all. If he let go of his barriers, if he allowed any more to exist he would have abandoned everything he’d worked tirelessly for all these past years — nearly all his life if truth were to be told.

It wasn’t that she wasn’t worth it, to him she was worth the world. That, unfortunately, meant he could not abandon his mission to be with her. It would be the death of all if he were to fail and she would have no world left to smile that brilliant smile of hers within. How he missed that smile…

“Severus, my loyal servant,” the Dark Lord said while they both stood in the abandoned hall of Malfoy Manner. “My liege,” he replied, lowering his head for a second as the snake-like man stepped closer. “Tonight, we shall end the impure and lay waste to those who dare oppose me. We will start a new world, a perfect world where those worthy shall relish the freedom from the filth.” “Yes, my liege.” “I can feel it, the time has finally come for the world to see reason and fall in line.” “Yes, my liege. They will all bow, to you, your excellency,” Severus said as he kept his tone even, his face a stoic mask of a void. “Come, let us join the others.” And they apparated to the grounds of Hogwarts, just beyond the border of the soon crumbling defence keeping them out.

Severus could not help but wonder where you were as his feet hit the soggy grounds of the forbidden forest. He, a man of little belief, sent a silent prayer to any god or being who might have listened to keep you safe until the end. If he could lay down his life knowing you were safe, that would be the greatest comfort he could ever ask for.

⩤• Belinna •⩥

I was a shell, a little tiny droplet in the ocean, one grain of sand in the vastness of the world, a perhaps broken little thing that had lost its way. Moving from place to place for more than a year, cutting contact with all those I loved and cherished, hiding — as he asked of me. Why his love mattered more than any other I still couldn’t quite grasp. It just did. Knowing the hopes of ever seeing him again to be close to zero made me feel an even greater need to honour his wish, to help him stay safe, to pretend I was dead so he didn’t need to worry about me when he already worried about far too much.

Perhaps it was silly of me, but by Merlin, I still held on to that sliver of hope that all would be fine in the end. Despite the blackening of the world, the maddening hunts for those not pure, and the waste of life and blood I could do nothing about, I still held hope. A tiny flicker I refused to put out. My one job was to help keep Severus safe by renouncing my own existence. It hadn’t been easy giving my life up, even if it had always been mediocre and of no particular value. It was still my life I gave up. “I’d do anything for him though, so really, why am I thinking about it all now?”

The wind rustled the trees, the canopies swaying and dancing in the wind as the entire sky had gone horribly grey — as if the world knew something I didn’t. The little cabin I’d managed to rent from an old muggle couple in the south of Denmark was a cute thing, with floral curtains and a sort of comfortable ease embedded in the very walls of the place — yet today, I found no peace. I couldn’t get my heart to calm down, if it was anxiety or just longing I couldn’t quite tell. Perhaps something else entirely.

As the day passed, it only hammered harder. I was struggling to breathe when evening came and my entire body was restlessly itchy — a need to move, to run, to get somewhere. It was overwhelmingly strong. So, I paced the little kitchen. Tried to make my body calm down and settle back into its usual state. A whoosh filled the air and I jolted as a dreary-looking elf appeared on the kitchen table. “Master Draco sent me, miss.” “Master-, who?” I asked, trying to get my head wrapped around the creature who looked nothing like the other elf I’d met over a year ago. I had never seen him again after that one time. Was he alright? Still wearing those goofy clothes? “Master Draco, Master Draco Malfoy, miss,” said the elf with a lowering of its head. “My master wishes you to help, miss. His protector, needs help, miss.” “His protector? What-, what on earth are you talking about?” I asked, clutching at my chest where the incessant pounding of my heart was turning unbearable. Beyond anything natural.

“He is to die, but my master is kind, he knows his protector needs help, miss.” “His-, I don’t know who you’re talking— Haaa— ” My sentence got cut by a horrendous tensing in my chest, it felt like my heart was being pulled out of my chest and I fell to my knees. The thud echoed through my entire body, the tang of a memory filled the back of my throat. As if there was something there when there wasn't. “Miss, you need to go. My master’s protector needs you, my master asks you to help when he cannot help.” “Bloody hell, fuck—” I panted, gripped at my clothes, and tried to hold myself still while my chest heaved and seemed to nearly cave in on itself. “Follow your heart, miss,” the elf said. “Follow your heart, my master said to tell you.” “Follow my— SEVERUS!”

The elf evaporated in thin air, I crumbled to the floor. No, no, no. Severus… No… But the ache in my heart only grew stronger, unlike anything I had ever felt before. There had been days of pain, days of tensing, days my heart ached in a manner it shouldn’t have. It all started back when I drank that potion Severus had provided, that day in the blizzard when he tried to break my last hope of us ever being with each other — of him living. He hadn’t managed, I’d still had that flicker of hope and through it all, it never faltered. It nested in my heart like a secret greater than any other.

The ache was unbearable when the elf’s words echoed in my mind. “Follow my heart, follow it…” I whispered in a wheezing breath as I let go of anything and everything, thinking only of Severus as I felt my pounding heart twist in on itself and my body turned too heavy for me to keep myself from laying flat on the cold floor. It turned to soggy ground, damp and covered in roots. The all too familiar surroundings of Hogwarts grounds took shape all around me as my heart thumped harder yet the pain lessened.

I got up on my knees and hands, lifting my head to see a cacophony of spells filling the air — red, green, blue, white, streaks, and explosions. High up, by the crumbling castle, a battle was taking place and my entire body roared at the sight. My friends, my second home, my childhood, and adulthood — it was under attack and I hadn’t been there to help. I hadn’t even known it was happening as I’d cut off the world so completely. Severus… Severus, where are you? I wondered while I tried to suffocate the nausea twisting my guts from the sudden transportation.

I hissed as something snapped at my calves. Looking to the side and back, the Whomping Willow was readying itself to hit me with full force. I rolled away, its giant branches just missing me as I panted and got on my feet. The garbled sound of screams and shouts barely reached me from the castle, a dull murmur carried by the wind. My heart got pierced. Something invisible drove itself through me and sent me to my knees as the most horrendous pain spread through my entire body. My heart lurched in my chest, and I landed on creaking floorboards that seemed to sway beneath my hands and knees.

I panted, tried to suffocate the cries wanting to leave my mouth. Beyond the slightly ajar door several feet came rushing by, dressed in muggle-like clothes I knew it could only be kids. “Hurry,” I heard the all too familiar voice of Hermione Granger. “You can’t go by yourself, mate,” said Ron Weasley — his voice deeper than I remembered but still clearly his. “He’ll be in the forest, I have to do this alone after I take this to the pensive…” said Harry Potter but the voices died down as they moved down the steps and out of the Shrieking Shack.

My heart lurched again and all I could think of was Severus, I didn’t care where the kids were going, what they were going to do or who Mr Potter would be meeting in the forest — all I could think of was getting to Severus, to find him.

⩤• Severus •⩥

I thought she would come… His mind was letting go, turning fuzzy and unlike itself. The poison was spreading, the antidote he’d consumed only staving off his death but not any of the symptoms. His heart was slowing down, his thoughts turned muffled and groggy, his breathing a wheezing barely there. His body slid down the back of the bed he’d been half propped up against, he was tilting to the side and began to fall toward the floor below.

Something soft caught his head, a muffled voice from far away seemed pierced with agony as it screamed a likeness of his name. He tried to focus, tried to stave off the slumber of not dying but being wrapped up in death. “Severus…” It was her, her voice, so broken and frail in a hazy fog. “Severus, no, no, stay with me, stay with me,” she pleaded and he felt his heart thump a harder beat. But just one. You came… My love… You still have hope… You found... me…

His mind turned quiet, his body a mere lump of unmoving muscles and unfeeling skin. His heart beat slowly, just enough to keep him from dying but not enough to keep him conscious. He knew there was no hope, but he was thankful he’d heard your voice one last time. He hadn’t told a single soul of his plan, and so, there was none who could reverse the death his body would face within days from the poison filling his veins. Yet, he was at peace, knowing you were alive and that all would end once Potter learned of his role in the death of the Dark Lord. He had done his part, until the very end...

⩤• Belinna •⩥

I screamed, I wailed, I cried and I pounded his chest while his head rested in my lap. He laid atop me as he had in his office, yet, this time it was different. He was dying. There was barely a breath leaving him, I could only feel the faintest of sporadic heartbeats when I laid my palms against his chest and pleaded with the universe to bring him back to me.

“Why did you do this?” I asked, scrunching up the robes beneath my hands before grabbing onto him. Something hard lay within his cloak, I shoved my hands into the inner pocket and found a vial. There was no label, but as I sniffed it the similarity to the smell of a bezoar was unmistakable. Antidote. You took antidote! My hope soared to the sky only to plummet just as fast. That he was dying in my arms only meant it hadn’t fully worked, or it had been the wrong one, or that there wasn’t any potion strong enough to counteract the poison injected through the wound in his neck. I knew it could only have come from one thing, the creature the Dark Lord held so dear. It was no secret he had a pet snake, a giant one at that.

“Mom!” I called in shocked exclamation as I jolted into a straight position. I wasn’t crying out for her, but if the man I loved would have any chance of survival I knew I needed help — not from the world of magic I was part of, but from the muggle one my chosen family lived in. “Hold on, Sev. Just, hold on for me,” I pleaded as I worked up the courage to apparate. I knew it was dangerous, with Severus being in the state he was it could very well cost him his life. But, I had no choice. If I did nothing he would slowly die, fading away until his heart stopped.

With a deep breath, and all the will I could muster, I cleared my head of everything but my chosen home. The home I was welcome in as myself, without any pressure to only associate with those of the same blood as me. Pure blood. My muggle family was far greater than my biological one, far kinder, far better in all manners and I had them to thank for becoming the woman I now was. Please, please, please be there, I thought and held on to Severus before wishing us away from the battle to return home. Even if returning home after all this time, with everyone thinking I was missing or dead, had my heart in a different kind of uproar.

I shook my head, my hands still grasping Severus fiercely as the familiar warmth of my former home enveloped me effortlessly. The smell of disinfectant and fabric softener, the sound of the radio blaring classical music, and the all-white interior were a contrasting brightness to the gloomy dark we’d come from. No battle sounds or creaking walls were heard either.

I checked Severus over, he was still breathing and his heart thumped in its sporadic pattern with too long pauses between each beat. “Hold on, Sev, please, hold on,” I whispered as I cradled his head in my lap. “Helen, is that you darling?” came the voice of my mom from upstairs, just beyond my view from the living room floor. My heart lurched and guilt trickled in with fear — what if she turned me away now?

It didn’t matter. Severus needed help and, even if Mom would want nothing to do with me, she’d never turn her back on someone in need of her. She was too kind-hearted. “No… It’s-, it’s me,” I said and her steps faltered in the hallway. “Please-, please, help,” I pleaded while sobs racked through me, the comfort and safety of my old home — my old sanctuary — too overwhelming. “Belinna?” Mom asked, her voice hesitant but her rushed steps echoed right away.

“Mom, please,” I whispered and she stopped in the doorway, her face paler than usual while her wide eyes found me on the floor, cradling Severus with tears streaming down my cheeks that I couldn’t stop. “What-, how-, why-, Belinna!” she called out as her face crumbled into a sad relief before she ran up and dove for me, hugging my shoulders harshly. “My sweet, oh, my sweet, you’re alive,” she sobbed and kissed my head. “Mom, please, please help,” I pleaded and held Severus closer to me while she leaned back.

Severus was so pale, so cold to the touch. But Mom switched gears before I had time to say another word. The blood on his clothes, the look of him, it had her in full doctor mode instantly.

She asked so many questions and I had answers for so few. She never asked who he was, what he was to me, where I’d been or anything of the sort while she looked at him, inspected the wound, took his pulse and flashed a light in his eyes several times.

“Oh, where’s Pete when you need him,” she sighed after a while. “What?” “Well, we need to move him,” she explained and I scrunched my eyebrows at her - not understanding how she still forgot about magic after all these years. “Where do you want him?” I asked while taking out my wand. “Oh, right, yes, of course, guest room,” she said in a rush while standing and I levitated Severus up to the second floor, just barely able to swing him around in the narrow landing above before gently manoeuvring him through the door to the guest room.

Everything happened in a rush after that. Mom talked about blood, antidotes, risks, cardiac arrest and a whole bunch of doctor terms I couldn’t wrap my head around while I sat on the floor, holding Severus’s hand firmly while attempting not to break down in a complete mess.

***

Four hours later we were situated at the local hospital, Severus was hooked up to a strange machine that pumped out his blood, purified it, and pumped it back into him. He looked terrible, cold sweat lingered on his forehead, his hair sticking to it and he seemed even paler. How is that even possible? You're as pale as they come, Sev.. “Now, we need to keep him warm, the blood cools when it moves through here,” Mom said while pointing to the machine while I watched her fully dressed in scrubs. “I’ll have the nurse fetch some blankets, but you can hold the tube closest to his arm so the blood heats up from your body heat. It’ll help, darling,” she continued and I moved on noodle legs to the other end of the bed to do as she said.

I hesitantly moved the sticky strands of his hair before reaching up to kiss his cold forehead. “Belinna,” Mom said and I looked at her, not knowing what to say or do. “Where have you been?” she asked, all calm and collected but the tapping of her finger against her thigh said otherwise. “H-hiding,” I confessed. “He asked me to.” I glanced at Severus, avoiding the sad eyes of my mom. The guilt was nearly too much, it had been easier when I didn’t see all the people I abandoned. “This man?” I nodded. “Who is he to you? Who is he period?” she asked and I bit my lip, not knowing what to tell her.

“Belinna, answer me,” Mom eventually said and I caved, my shoulders slumping. “The man I love,” I said. “He’s-, he saved the world, saved so many people, and is seen as a monster. A traitor, a… He’s… His name, I-I can’t give you mom, it’s too dangerous.” “Belinna, I’m your mother and you will talk to me,” Mom declared and a second later my head was pressed into her stomach as she cradled me with all the love a mother could ever offer. I caved. All my fear, all my hurt, all my worry, it all spilt to the surface and I cried while she held me. And then, I told her everything.

…To Be Continued…

LINKTREE // AO3 // MASTERLIST

A/N: Uffh... Gosh, this part hurt to write - reminds me too frikkin much of the movie and how that (questionable) canon ends 😩 Sevy-boy is alive, and he's getting better - now we just gotta figure out the aftermath of this entire mess 👀👍

Q: Would you rather go to a Yule Ball confined to the Great Hall for 10 hours with Severus OR have 52 hours to roam the entirety of Hogwarts and its grounds with no risk of harm but only seeing Severus once from afar? 👀 A: Honestly, this Q is mean... why did I ask this Q? Ugh... I'd have to go with option 2, roaming Hogwarts - so much I wanna see and try so 🙈

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[Dec:2023]

[bobdobalina]

an observation from Nov 27, 2020

Today's Wagner insight is that the final moments of Walküre Act I and Siegfried Act I are nearly identical. In both cases, the heroic tenor (first Siegmund, then his son Siegfried) has finally gotten his hands on the sword that was promised to him, Nothung, which has lain dormant for years awaiting its worthy owner, and he holds it up in celebration.

To nearly the exact same melody, Siegmund sings "So blühe denn Wälsungen-Blut!" ("so thrives the bloodline of the Wälsungs!") and a generation later, Siegfried (who is the final product of that bloodline) sings "So schneidet Siegfrieds Schwert!" ("so slices the sword of Siegfried!").

The furiously-playing orchestra falls briefly, dramatically silent to allow the hero to hit these money notes, playing only three key chords. For Siegmund, it's Em-B7-Em (i-V7-i) — he is reclaiming something old that was promised to him, so the music returns to its home key, in perhaps the most classically satisfying cadence of resolution. Whereas for Siegfried, who has melted down the shards of his broken inheritance and literally reforged it into a new sword, the orchestra pivots to a new, major, key: Em-A7-D. He is like his father, but he is not his father.

In both cases, after the tenor's moment of glory, the orchestra comes roaring back ("furiously," "as fast as possible"), with brass using the third chord to launch into the Sword motif, while the characters celebrate orgasmically and the curtain falls. The characters who began the opera stuck in miserable situations have discovered a way out, fulfilling old prophecies and conquering their first obstacles — oblivious to the problems that have already been set in motion and will ultimately spell their doom. It's the perfect way to end a first act.

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[fly-pow-bye]

DuckTales 2017 - “How Santa Stole Christmas!”

Story by: Francisco Angones, Madison Bateman, Colleen Evanson, Christian Magalhaes, Bob Snow

Written by: Colleen Evanson

Storyboard by: Sam King, Kathryn Marusik, Stephan Park

Directed by: Jason Zurek

The Last Christmas...episode of DuckTales 2017.

Twas the night before Christmas, and all throughout the night, The kids are reminded of Scrooge and Santa's fight. Previous episodes have brought up Scrooge's Santa furore And this is the episode where we get the whole story.

The episode starts with Della, tucking her children into bed, Feeding them stories to put in their head. It's not the usual story, as her children moan, but reasons for that old elf to not be allowed in their home.

But outside of Webby, the kids aren't Santa-haters Even if he's known by the McDucks for being among traitors They hear thumps on the roof, and the kids will go to the Manor's ceiling, where they see a shadow

As the figure shows himself, their childlike wonder was not blessed...

...as it was someone else whose name starts with S.

Scrooge was preparing his defenses against any reindeer, and ensuring on Christmas, no Claus will be near. He ensures the kids they don't need him, as he is rich. See, he's able to give them all hats that itch.

It's practical, he says, though the kids think it's lame As they wanted a trampoline, a cell phone, and a video game. Before Scrooge can explain, he hears the doorbell. Carolers, Scrooge assumes, and the lies that they tell.

He opens the door, Webby readying weapons she possessed and it turned out to be our jolly old guest. Scrooge grits his teeth, and the children shout with glee...

...and then Santa falls down, nearly crushing Dewey.

It's here that I realize this rhyming is annoying you, and that's okay, because I'm getting tired of it, too. I can really only do this for a short review-ey, So the rest of this are normal paragraphs, ah phooey.

So Santa falls down and breaks his leg, and even Scrooge, with his pretty low opinion on Santa Claus, is concerned for his well being. He even has to motion to Webby to put down her grappling hook that she was apparently was preparing to put into Santa's chest. She then slowly brings out a sword. It's a joke on the same level as that spork one from a previous episode; it's a classic Webby moment.

After hearing that Frank Sinatra-esque Christmas-themed opening from the last Christmas episode, now with 100% more Della, Santa wakes up near the chimney fire. I like the detail that it's barred up to prevent Santa's usual Christmas travel, though as I was told as a kid who lived in a house that didn't have a chimney and this episode proves, he can use a door just fine. In this universe, he's real, and he proves this by giving Huey, Dewey, and Louie their video game, trampoline, and cell phone, respectively. He tries to do the same with Webby, but she pretends to like her hat better. Got to look good for the man she idolizes, after all.

That man, Scrooge, decides to reveal exactly what Santa did to get his ire: he stole something from him. All but one of the kids can't believe it, and the one exception couldn't figure out exactly what that something could be. Don't worry, this is not going to become one of those Christmas Carol pastiches, as DuckTales 2017 is a lot more clever than that and didn't feel like competing with that rat that must not be named. Instead, it's more like Santa Claus is Coming To Town, where we get to hear the origin of the holiday that Scrooge says was stolen from him. The title isn't wrong, it really is actually Santa that stole Christmas this time!

Santa doesn't have time for this, as he needs to get Christmas finished before sunrise. It is still Christmas Eve, after all. He asks Scrooge, with his belt so tight, to drive his sleigh tonight, and it takes some begging from Huey, Dewey, and Louie for him to oblige. Well, that, and Santa offers him to never come to the McDuck Manor if he does the deed. That's not the only offer, as Santa decides to tell the kids a story I thought would be the noodle incident of the cartoon.

The story begins with Scrooge during one of his business stints, selling heat-giving coal to the populace of a snow-filled village, with no buyers in one particular cottage. He finds a polar bear with a sleigh singing about bells that jingle, and Scrooge comes over to help him out. Introducing himself as Santa Claus, Scrooge finds out that he does have similar goals, though Santa prefers to warm people's hearts with toys rather than coal. Santa tries that same cottage, offering a gift for free, and they happily let him in, and he was so kind that they even allow him to bring that guest that was yelling at them to buy his coal.

The big guy ends up being the life of the party at the cottage with his new hit song, filled with people of short stature with colorful costumes, until the fire burns out. Scrooge's coal ends up saving the party, though Santa had to use his own way of selling it by just grabbing it right out of his bag and throwing it in the fireplace. This warms the hearts and the house of the cottage dwellers, though Scrooge could tell it's more because he's a friend of that jolly guy than anything else. It's quite clear Scrooge has more reason to start his hatred of that red guy beyond being named after that classic Christmas-time villain.

The hatred doesn't start just yet, though, but he is a little bewildered by an idea that Santa Claus has: not only does he want to bring this heat source to this cottage and the people who were just visiting it, but to everyone in the world in one night! Scrooge knows this is impossible, but Santa feels he knows some way he can do this. This begins a brand new friendship, and this is where Webby is confused.

Webby: Wait, Scrooge doesn't have any friends!

Understandably, Goldie is more of a frenemy, being friends with Launchpad is far too easy to count, and it's debatable if anyone is Gyro's friend, either.

We cut to what's happening in the present, where Scrooge gets on the sleigh with all of the reindeer kids would know. All the kids know Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Comet, Cupid, Donner, and Blitzen. If they think of any other reindeer's name, well, let's let another Christmas special sort that one out:

Olive, the other reindeer: By the way, where's Rudolph?

Comet: There's no Rudolph. It's just one of those urban legends.

Along with Santa and himself, Scrooge decides to only let the one kid who knows Santa is a fraud, Webby, on the sleigh. The kids protest, and Santa implies to them that if they go to bed, they would be on the nice list. They already got their gifts, and if Santa ends up doing his end of the bargain, it wouldn't even matter, but the nephews decide to go back to bed. One could argue that Santa could boop his nose and instantly turn the video game, cell phone, and trampoline into coal, and that one is confusing this episode with another special with siblings that wear the primary colors.

As the reindeer fly into the sky, Webby continues her anti-Santa creed, saying that she wouldn't be wooed by dolls, candles, or crossbows. That last one does end up piquing Webby's interest enough, and Santa does reveal that, yup, that's what she was getting. Scrooge tells Santa it's going to take more than that, and Webby isn't trying too hard to prove that's true. In fact, she actually blurts that she's worried that Santa wouldn't be able to finish Christmas in time, and Santa tells her, and it's all because of another artifact from that legendary Finch journal. No, I'm just kidding, there's no journal in this episode; along with the Halloween episode that also doesn't feature it, this episode was written before anything else in this season.

That artifact is the Feliz Navidiamond, a diamond that can slow down time to the point where the mission to give coal to everyone on Earth is a possibility rather than pure fantasy, and Scrooge happens to have a map that leads right to it. Said map leads to Cascabel Cavern, a cavern known for having creatures of legend defend it, including the Los Renos Voladores. Those who know their Spanish, as Scrooge does, may see where this is going. Santa didn't just have the flying reindeer show up at his doorstop one day, he had to encounter them at the cavern along with his new friend. While Scrooge attempts to use his cane to fend one of them off, he notices that Santa appears to be taming the flying beasts with his jingle bells. Again, the contrast between the charitable and caring Santa and the practical yet uncaring Scrooge shows itself here, along with the contrast between how much they're enjoying this partnership.

Webby says she can figure out why Santa decided to keep them, as reindeer are known for their long horns and good efficiency. Scrooge asks her why she even cares about this, and Webby, once again, tries to say that his fantastic flying reindeer aren't really her thing. For a super-spy in training, she is surprisingly bad at this. Her Santa hatred breaks throughout the episode as she slowly develops from someone who blindly goes with what Scrooge says to realizing that this elf may be a little more than what her idol says he is. I could see parallels with this character arc in this one episode and her development from the sheltered Scrooge fangirl who can't figure out how the real world works of Season 1 to the caring girl with some Scrooge fangirl tendencies she is in Season 3, and that's neat to see. I do think her just blindly believing in Scrooge’s stories in the beginning is a little bit of a negative, though.

While the story is happening, the episode decides it's montage time. To the tune of Scrooge's least favorite song, guess which one, we see Webby and Scrooge give gifts to various people, including Webby taking her time to give both Violet and the still-looking-like-she-did-before-that-one-episode Lena a kiss, though the latter is understandable because, as mentioned before, they wrote these holiday specials first. We also get an extended scene where Scrooge has to wade through all the Beagle Boys in the naughty list to give a gift to Bouncer Beagle, who somehow managed to get on the nice list. I did question at first how time appears to be flowing quite well in these scenes judging by the giftee's reactions, but I could understand that the Feliz Navidiamond only works when they're on the sleigh. After Santa saves Scrooge from the Beagle Boys, he says they're even, referring to something that happened after the taming of the not-Rudolphs.

In the Cascabel Cavern, we get to see the rise of a guardian, who some people might call Jack Frost though they don't call it that. No, not the Jack Frost from those guardians, I say to the people who still remember that movie exists.

No, it's a Jack Frost like the movie with the snowman. I'm sure Santa could sense that Michael Keaton film from nearly a century later, as he tries to calm the roaring snowman with a delightful gift. Hopefully it's Campbell's Soup, and then we'll find out inside that guardian was just a really, really cold little boy that's mother decided to leave out in the cold for way too long. Unfortunately, that too was the wrong Jack Frost, as this one's more like the 1997 one that had 100% less Michael Keaton and 100% more killer snowmen.

We get our big fight scene of the week, as Scrooge rescues Santa by pelting the snowman with his flaming coal, riding a flying reindeer. Which reindeer is it? It's so awesome, nobody really needs to care. With this help, Santa grabs onto the Feliz Navidiamond, slowing down time to the point where it almost seems like time has stopped, and they can just waltz out of the cave with it. In their words, they're running on Christmas time. I should point out that they don't create Christmas, as they refer to it all throughout this flashback, they just create the tradition that happens on Christmas. They don't go further than that, and that's all I will say on that subject. Rule of three dictates that there should be some other monster after this, and...well, let's just say the next enemy Christmas has to face may not be a monster or some animals with abilities beyond regular animals.

As Scrooge leaves to deliver one final Christmas present, telling Webby to keep a present as he's got it, Webby decides to ask one question that's been on her mind: why would Santa do all of this without getting paid? Santa replies that he gets the greatest gift of all, and I jokingly thought this was going to lead to him talking about the Santa Bills that he sends to the children's parents. Of course, that would deter kids from asking for those Disney playsets, so we get a heartwarming speech from Santa about Christmas being about the warmth of the heart one gets from giving gifts. A much better alternative, I'd say, it's a good speech and one fitting for a Christmas special.

There is one major thing in this Christmas origin story that hasn't been brought up yet: how did Santa giving coal to everyone to warm up their homes become only giving coal to the bad children and giving toys to the good children? They really only show the idea of the latter once, with Doofus getting a nasty looking box in his stocking, and even then, it doesn't look like coal.

The next Christmas, Scrooge barges in the door, singing his own version of Jingle Bells involving his favorite practical black rocks, and Santa has a small suggestion to make about Christmas. Instead of just giving out coal, why not bring them a special surprise on Christmas morning: a special gift for free as a promotion for their coal distribution business! Scrooge immediately balks at the idea of giving out handouts. Oh, rich people. This eventually leads to Scrooge getting into a big fight with Santa, and they break up.

This isn't the monster part, as that happens much later in the history of Christmas. In fact, they're remembering it right now, as they find that Santa's sack appears to be still filled with Christmas presents. If those are the presents with all the toys, what did they gave the children? No, not just a practical gift meant to warm people's homes rather than their hearts...

...but a practical gift meant to warm people's homes rather than their hearts and an invoice for it, too! We even fade to Scrooge, making a rather evil grin that feels like it came from another famous Christmas special. He really is a mean one, Mr. Scrooge. Now, being an outright villain may seem a bit out of character for him; he's usually only a villain when he has to play one in a wrestling ring. But, come on, do you expect a guy named Scrooge to be the good guy in a Christmas story, never mind give out handouts? I will say that his evil grin does go against any interpretation that he's doing this for good, as he implies. I mean, he's so much of a Grinch...

...he even has his own Cindy Lou Who named Jennifer, a poor girl in desperate need for anything, including warmth. She even takes this lump of coal he gives her and turns it into a toy. She's that desperate for some warmth in her heart, and no speech from Scrooge about how practical that coal could be to warm her home could change that. It doesn't take a genius to find out if this causes Scrooge's heart to grow three sizes.

To make a long story short, we get another speech from Santa about why he even bothered to have Scrooge help him, and there's even another twist about Santa here that makes this trip just that much more special. The ending is quite clever, too, and it does fit into the family side of the Christmas tradition. Since this is most likely the last DuckTales 2017 Christmas episode, it's a great ending in many ways.

How does it stack up?

I was greatly entertained as this episode arrived, As I humbly give this episode a Scrooge number of five. Now I'll say, to everyone reading this site, Happy holidays to all, and to all a good night.

Well, that's it for now, as DuckTales enters yet another hiatus. In fact, this is the last big review I'll make this year. Have a Slightly Better New Year, because it sure couldn't be worse than this one.

← The Fight For Castle McDuck! 🦆 Beaks in the Shell! →

[thisbluespirit]

For @bunn1cula : #david collings#also if you have a list of stuff he's distressed and or deaded in that are available to watch#let me know!#blake's 7#sapphire and steel

Well, okay, but bear in mind that David Collings came out of nowhere to be Raskolnikov from Crime & Punishment so his entire early career was a mix of crying, dying, suffering and murdering people.  Sadly, a lot of this is burninated, probably including C&P itself, but here are some of the things you can try:

Gideon’s Way “The Prowler” (this is a terrible ITC series and a terrible ep re. mental health issues, but it is some quality very early wee distressed/murderous David Collings.)

Level 7 (part of the SF anthology Out of the Unknown) is the apocalyptic story I was mentioning in the other post.  It’s pretty great, although they lobotomised David Collings too early in my opinion.  (He’s wee and sarcastic and adorable and the only person in the bunker who doesn’t want to have sex to a rota.)

UFO ep “The Psychobombs.”  UFO bores me a lot (I am not allowed to watch any more of it because all I do is find more evidence that SHADO are an evil organisation maligning poor innocent aliens.  But I have an inconvenient ITC allergy, see Gideon’s Way above, so I’m probably being unfair.)  BUT aliens hypnotise three humans and turn them into bombs!  One of them is David Collings!  The colour is very pretty, although I didn’t find it worth watching on once they blew up David Collings.

Scrooge (1970) - okay, so he doesn’t die, but Albert Finney is mean to him.  BUT his hair is amazing, he sings and has half a dozen wee red-headed children and cries in a snowy graveyard.  (But watch out for the totally random WTH bit where Scrooge suddenly goes to Hell immediately after the snowy graveyard scene.  I had blocked this out of my head so hard I have forgotten to warn people in the past.  Sorry, people!  Why is there random Hammer Horror Hell in the middle of this??)

“The Suicide Club”“ from Mystery and Imagination - this isn’t up currently but I recommend regular searching for it because it is top notch improbable, suffering, dying wee murderous moppet David Collings. 

Elizabeth R - “Horrible Conspiracies.” - He’s Anthony Babington.  It doesn’t end well.

Shadow of the Tower - eps 3 & 4.  Having been tortured in the Tower the previous year by a Tudor monarch, David Collings comes back to get tortured in the Tower again by a different Tudor monarch, which was how I found James Maxwell. 

I’m sure I don’t need to mention Doctor Who’s “Robots of Death” but if you have somehow missed it so far, this is the classic bit of 1970s David Collings in distress, as written by Chris Boucher.  (He is also, of course, burned, alien, undead and has spaghetti on his head in the Fifth Doctor serial Mawdryn Undead.) (No links, but they are up and down all the time on Dailymotion, so just search.)

Julius Caesar (BBC 1979) as Cassius.  This isn’t currently up, but again, it does appear sometimes, so keep searching.  (The DVDs can also sometimes be found very cheaply secondhand, too).  It’s feels so very B7 it hurts and the combination of Richard Pasco and David Collings is one of the most amazing things the BBC ever did.  Have this vid in the meantime. XD

Also not up, but worth looking for: The Professionals “Stake Out” is not great or anything, but David Collings is a weasely terrorist who gets beaten up, soaked and made to disarm his own bomb.  Ditto children’s TV serial Midnight Is A Place, where he plays Julian Oakapple, the tutor with a tragic past, a love of music, and who gets badly burned halfway through.  He also sings the theme song.

(I mean, and that’s just the TV and not the radio/audio, and only the available ones and not, say, the one where he works as a PR guy in a chocolate factory that gets accidentally cannibalistic, or the one where he was an evil Bertie Wooster.  The man had a sex scene on the radio.  He was a terrible person. XD)

Oh, oh, wait, while I’m making this giant David Collings post, let me throw in a rec for his stalwart Look & Read efforts (aka BBC Educational learn to read telly).  There’s Dark Towers (he is two people, one of them is dead, both of them are called Lord Dark, and it also has Gary Russell in it) and Through the Dragon’s Eye.  He’s only in eps 5-8, but he’s the villain Charn and somebody forgot to tell him or the costume designer not to go overboard on terrifying every child in the country.  If you want a laugh and some quality Collings content, these two are priceless. 

Have fun?

[treasureattampinesofficial]

Is TREASURE AT TAMPINES Really a Good Buy?

 Treasure at Tampines has been one of the most talked-about new launch condo projects in 2019, and it is due to an obvious reason: scarcity.

The popularity of new condominiums in Tampines has grown exponentially over the last decade since Waterview along Tampines Avenue 1 was first launched in November 2010.

Since then, a couple more condominiums were launched along that same stretch. It started with Q Bay Residences, The Santorini, Alps Residences, and The Tapestry.

These projects were well-received by property buyers and most of them have already been snapped up. Even the newer executive condominiums (ECs) such as The Arc at Tampines, The TampinesTrilliant, and CityLife @ Tampines were all fully sold.

Property developer SimLian Group clearly saw this strong demand and the scarcity of new units available for sale. Furthermore, none of the earlier private condos were close to an MRT station or near amenities.

Therefore, it was willing to pay an exorbitant price of $970 million for the collective sale of Tampines Court back in August 2017.

 Initial signs have indeed shown that the developer was spot on. It drew around 7,000 prospects to the sales gallery for Treasure at Tampines on the very first day of opening for public preview.

The hype continued all the way to its launch weekend (during end March 2019) when 272 units were sold over two days. And over a period of 4 months, a total of 571 units have already been sold as on 31 July 2019.

As a matter of fact, Treasure at Tampines has been one of the top-selling new launch condos for the last couple of months. But is Treasure at Tampines really a good buy? Let us take a look at the details of this new condo at Tampines before we go into our review.

Treasure at Tampines Project Information

In order to give you a better overview, here is the project information (or known as factsheet) for Treasure at Tampines condo.

Treasure at Tampines Developer

The developer Treasure at Tampines is none other than SimLian Group, one of the veterans in Singapore’s real estate market scene.

Established since 1976 as a construction company, SimLian Group was officially listed on the Singapore Stock Exchange (SGX) in 2000 and has shifted its main focus in property development by forming SimLian Land.

In 2006, SimLian Group became the first-ever private property developer in Singapore to be involved in the Design, Build and Sell Scheme (DBSS) by the Housing Development Board (HDB) of Singapore.

The Premiere @ Tampines became SimLian Group’s first DBSS residential project and its first entry into the Tampines housing estate.

Since then, SimLian Group has developed a couple more residential projects in Tampines – such as Centrale 8 at Tampines (a DBSS project), The TampinesTrilliant (an executive condo), and Waterview.

 Waterview condo by developer SimLian Group

Other than residential developments in Singapore, SimLian Group has also ventured into other real estate segments such as commercial and industrial. In addition, they have also been involved in numerous residential projects within countries which includes Malaysia and Australia.

Treasure at Tampines Location

Treasure at Tampines is located at the former site of Tampines Court and along Tampines Lane – a newly constructed road which will be accessible via Tampines Street 11.

It is also situated right next to several landmarks within the neighborhood such as the Tampines Town Council, the TampinesChangkat Community Club, and the Butterfly Garden.

Walking distance to Tampines and Simei MRT Station

Unlike the earlier condo launches in the same precinct, Treasure at Tampines geographically much closer to an MRT station. However, it is much closer to Simei MRT station instead of Tampines MRT station – despite being located within Tampines itself.

Both these stations are situated along the East-West MRT line. Thus, you will have easy access to that unbeatable convenience of traveling from the eastern region to the western region of Singapore.

On top of that, do note that the Tampines MRT station is also an interchange station along the Downtown MRT line – which offers commuters that added convenience traveling from the east to the northwest.

By looking at the map, it does seem Treasure at Tampines condo is quite a distance away from these 2 train stations. If you plot it on Google Maps, the walking distance to both stations will take you at least 17 minutes.

Well, but we all like to take shortcuts, don’t we?

Let us make use of OneMap.sg here to plot the walking routes.

If we were to take a shortcut by walking through those public housing blocks that are situated along these routes to the MRT station, here’s how approximately much time you’ll be able to save.

As you can see, the amount of walking has been greatly reduced by around 40 percent. In other words, you will only require to take around 7 – 12 minutes of walking to reach Simei or Tampines MRT station.

Some prospects may feel that Treasure at Tampines is still pretty far away from the nearest MRT station, but if you look at it this way – the eastern part of the East-West MRT line mainly comprises of train stations that are situated above ground (from Kallang to PasirRis).

Thus, living in a condominium which is just to next to a train station in these areas may not be the best idea if you are a big fan of serenity and peace.

Surrounded by a wide range of amenities and heartland malls

One of the top benefits of living within a matured and well-established housing estate is that such area boasts an abundance of amenities.

Treasure at Tampines is practically surrounded by conveniences which would serve your everyday needs, such as grocery stores, F&B outlets, a bank, a childcare center, and the Tampines Round Market & Food Centre – where you can get your daily hunger fix with some local delicacies and marketing for some of the freshest ingredients.

Earlier on, we mentioned that it will take you around 7 – 12 minutes to walk from Treasure at Tampines to either Simei or Tampines MRT station.

Tampines Mall

That would also mean it will only require you that much time to walk to some of the biggest heartland malls in Singapore, namely Tampines Mall, Century Square, Tampines One, and Eastpoint Mall.

Within these malls, you will find some of the biggest retail brands, supermarkets, restaurants, and even movie theatres.

Close to numerous educational institutes

Another key advantage when living within a matured estate would be its close proximity to schools. This is probably one of the most important factors to consider – especially for homebuyers who have school-going kids.

Treasure at Tampines is located within the 1-km radius from a couple of primary schools, such as Angsana Primary School, Tampines Primary School, Junyuan Primary School, Yumin Primary School, Chongzheng Primary School, and Changkat Primary School.

For those who are looking to enter a higher level or tertiary education, you will be happy to know that Tampines Secondary School, St Hilda’s Secondary School, Springfield Secondary School, Junyuan Secondary School, Ngee Ann Secondary School, Tampines Junior College, and Temasek Polytechnic are all within the Tampines housing estate.

In addition, the United World College of South East Asia is also within the estate and it will cater to families who are looking to send their children to an international school.

Treasure at Tampines Condo Facilities

For a condominium housing more than 2,000 homes, you can rest assured that there will more than enough facilities to keep residents living within Treasure at Tampines condo happy.

Spanning across a land area of almost 6 hectares, the extensive space allows plentiful of facilities to constructed.

The key highlight within Treasure at Tampines would have to be the contemporary clubhouse, where you find a state-of-the-art gymnasium to serve your daily fitness needs, and a lavish function room to host a sumptuous event for your guests and friends.

If you look around Treasure at Tampines, you will realize that it has almost every condo facility that you can ever think of- from play spaces for the young ones to dining pavilions and relaxation corners for the adults; plenty of swimming pools, outdoor jacuzzis, spa pools, tennis court, areas for urban farming, and gardens.

Basically, you name it, Treasure at Tampines has it!

Treasure at Tampines Floor Plan and Unit Types

Treasure at Tampines comprises of 2,203 residential units in total, ranging from 1-bedroom units (463 sqft) to 5-bedroom units (1,722 sqft) – spreading across 29 residential blocks (12 storeys each). It is expected to TOP by 31 December 2023.

Here is the list of Treasure at Tampines floor plan for each unit type available.

1-Bedroom     / 1-Bedroom + Study (463 to 484 sqft)

 Type A1

 Type AS1

   PREV 1 of 2 NEXT 

2-Bedroom     (581 to 614 sqft)

 Type B1

 Type B3

 Type B2

    PREV 1 of 3 NEXT 

2-Bedroom     Premium (657 to 678 sqft)

 Type B4P

 Type B6P

 Type B5P

    PREV 1 of 3 NEXT 

2-Bedroom     + Study (678 sqft)

 Type B7S

 Type B8S

   PREV 1 of 2 NEXT 

3-Bedroom     (818 to 947 sqft)

 Type C1

 Type C7

 Type C2

        PREV 1 of 7 NEXT 

3-Bedroom     Premium (1,012 to 1,033 sqft)

 Type C8P

 Type C10P

 Type C9P

    PREV 1 of 3 NEXT 

4-Bedroom     (1,238 to 1,270 sqft)

 Type D1

 Type D3

 Type D2

    PREV 1 of 3 NEXT 

4-Bedroom     Premium (1,281 to 1,335 sqft)

 Type D4P

 Type D9P

 Type D5P

       PREV 1 of 6 NEXT 

5-Bedroom     Premium (1,668 to 1,722 sqft)

 Type E1

 Type E4

 Type E2

     PREV 1 of 4 NEXT 

    Treasure at Tampines Price Guide

The following table shows the Treasure at Tampines price indication for each residential unit type for sale (as of 15 August 2019).

Do note the pricing for Treasure at Tampines shown above is subjected to changes and future discounts (if any).

Hence, do drop us a note or give us a call at (+65) 6631-8384 for updates on the Treasure at Tampines price and availability of units for sale.

Treasure at TampinesShowflat

The Treasure at Tampinesshowflat is located along Tampines Avenue 7, right opposite the Sun Plaza Park and close to the Tampines Concourse Interchange.

If you are traveling by train, just alight at Tampines MRT station (Downtown Line) and head to Exit E. Once you are out of the station, you will be able to see the showflat.

In the showflat, you will get to see the following unit types.

2-Bedroom     + Study (Type B7S)

3-Bedroom     Premium (Type C9P)

4-Bedroom     Premium (Type D9P)

5-Bedroom     (Type E4)

Currently, the Treasure at Tampinesshowflat opening hours is from 11 am to 7 pm daily.

However, it may be subjected to changes. So do check with us via (+65) 6631-8384 for confirmation in order not to make a wasted trip to the showflat.

Treasure at Tampines Review

Being one of the top 10 cheapest condo projects in Singapore for 2019, Treasure at Tampines has put itself in competition with some of the other popular projects within the Outside Central Region (OCR) which are still selling – such as Riverfront Residences, and The Jovell.

So how is Treasure at Tampines different from the rest and what are the unique attributes that it has to offer? In this review, we will do a comparison between the products – and of course, the price as well.

The benchmark for all private condos

First of all, if you are looking into living in a private residential complex, Treasure at Tampines probably has everything a private condominium should have and everything you could possibly ask for as a private homeowner.

I am really impressed by the number of facilities that Treasure at Tampines condo is able to provide. With the massive number of units within the development and a huge site area of 6 hectares, it would be a complete disappointment if the developer didn’t cater enough communal facilities for the residents.

In addition,  it also has a wide range of unit types for prospects to choose from. Thus, it doesn’t matter if you are single or a family entity, there will definitely be a unit type within Treasure at Tampines that will suit you.

Attractively and competitively priced

As mentioned earlier, Treasure at Tampines is one of the cheapest condominium projects which you can find in today’s market. It is highly unlikely that you will find any new developments being priced lower than it in the next few years.

Let’s look at the following table and compare Treasure at Tampines price with other ongoing new launch projects of the same category (based on the total number of units sold up till 31 July 2019).

As you can see, Treasure at Tampines is competitively priced against its ‘competitors’ and given that it is located much closer to an MRT station and malls as compared to the rest, you can see why it has managed to sell more than a 100 units every month (on average).

The fact is, for any land sales or collective sales which were concluded after Tampines Court, they are mostly transacted at a higher land price/rate. In short, the more money the developers paid, the more homebuyers will also have to pay for the new development.

The only chance that you will get to enter the private residential market at a slightly lower rate would be getting an executive condominium (EC).

But we all know that it is not that easy to get one unless you fulfill certain requirements and status set by the government and it will take you at least 8 years before you are able to exit or reap any sorts of profit.

So the price is right, the condo is decent. Does that mean Treasures at Tampines is a good buy? Not quite… and here’s why.

Lack of prominence and uniqueness

Despite being considered as a veteran property developer, SimLian’s Treasure at Tampines, honestly, isn’t quite the private condominium it could be – or at least what we hope it would have been.

The facade and impressions are seriously a big disappointment. Being one of the most raved-about en bloc sales in 2017, we were hoping that SimLian would make Treasure at Tampines a truly iconic development in one of the biggest matured estates in Singapore.

Unfortunately, it looks just like any other mass-market condominium that you can find in the suburbs – just more crowded and with a public housing touch.

If you were to look at SimLian Group’s past projects (the completed ones), you can easily see that there isn’t much breakthrough in terms of the design from the residential projects they’ve developed.

I reckon the quality will be similar as well and it somehow makes one feel that he or she is paying more for less.

It’s not exactly a ‘private’ condo

Let’s put it this way. There’s a reason why a condominium is widely known as private residential development. Thus, with more than 2,000 homes within one single compound, I really doubt the amount of privacy that you are going to get living at this new condo in Tampines.

Assuming that every household in Treasure at Tampines consists of 3 pax, there will be around 6,609 people living within the condo itself – and that’s a lot of people.

When you are living in a private condo of such high-density, your privacy and peace are often being comprised. Ironically, aren’t these the main reasons why you’re buying into a private residential development in the first place?

Oh, and not forgetting that around 500 units will be facing in the direction of the Pan Island Expressway (PIE) slip road – which is pretty close to the expressway itself.

Unless you find it therapeutic by love hearing the sound of cars whizzing by all the time, I would strongly suggest you avoid these units.

Final word

As simple and affordable as Treasure at Tampines appears on the surface, it is definitely one of the new launches that should be on your shortlist.

Despite the lackluster effort in terms of design and quality (basically the way it’s being delivered), it does have an upper hand in terms of location.

The proximity to the Simei and Tampines MRT station is really a big plus point in my opinion. Although it’s not exactly right in front of the condo, at least it’s still within reasonable walking distance.

For the location, I would say the price certainly justifies. However, I really hoped that the developer would give more thoughts on architecture and quality.

Can you imagine buying a BMW but it looks exactly like a Toyota? Or buying a brand new iPhone in 2019 which is exactly the same design and specifications as the 2009 model, but you’re paying much more for it?

I’m not so sure about you, but for me, I would only get my hand on a property which I would love to come home to every day without having to deal with the crowd, human traffic, and noise.

If convenience is all I’m looking out for, then It wouldn’t really matter much if I live in public or private housing and probably invest my hard-earned money somewhere else.

[spine-buster]

Alone, Together | Chapter 34 | Morgan Rielly

A/N:  Some might consider this a little bit of a filler chapter, but I actually think it’s a really important piece in establishing Bee as a person.  Anywho...hope you guys enjoy!  The next two chapters they are back in the West Coast, so you know what that means..........😇

It was going to take a while for Bee to comes to terms with the fact that two of her best friends were leaving Toronto.  In the past ten days, she had tried to feel less selfish about the situation – how it affected her and how her life would change, how sad she was about it and how she was going to cope with it – and instead focus on the positives – how Tyler being in Ottawa would be a good leadership opportunity for him on a young team, and how Naz being traded to Colorado meant he would still be on a Cup-contending team.  She tried to think about the positives for Ashley, too – how Denver was a beautiful city to raise a family in.  How the media would still be loud but much quieter than the media in Toronto.  How she’d probably be able to check her Instagram and not have DMs flood her inbox or have bunny blogs gossip about her shopping habits at Holt Renfrew based on information they heard from their sister’s friend’s brother’s girlfriend’s hairstylist’s dog walker’s niece who saw her buy her second Yves Saint Laurent bag of the month.  

It would be okay.

Bee had to believe it would be okay.  Because if any doubt arose in her about the situation, she’d have another crying episode like she did that night of July 1st, where Morgan had to hold her all night, assuring her that everything would be okay, giving her the only answers he could.  She kept trying to think of the positives.  She didn’t do things to distract herself from the situation – she genuinely internalized the reality of the situation and tried to see the positives as much as possible.  It would make her feel better, she thought, about everything.  And Morgan – bless him – was helping as much as he could.  He knew better than anybody that it wouldn’t be easy for her, and so he took it upon himself to ease the pain.  No small feat.  But he did, because he loved her, because he wanted to see genuine smiles and laughs from her instead of forced happiness.  He started a countdown to their vacation to Vancouver.  He told her about how nice Tyson Barrie and Alexander Kerfoot (Kerfy, apparently) were, and how she’d like them.  How Kerfy was already a good friend because they had grown up together and played together in Vancouver.  He bought her bigger bouquets of flowers.  They got ice cream more often.  He let her cuddle into him however and whenever she wanted, and let her fall asleep on his chest with their limbs entwined and he’d carry her to bed, holding her in his arms the entire time.

Despite the emotional minefield that was July 1st, in the following days, she managed to register herself to write the first exam for her CFA certification in December, and she passed her driving test.  She was officially a G2 class driver.  Life had to move on.  It always did.  The only thing constant is change.  

So when Morgan told her to get in the car, because he was going to take her somewhere, that it was a surprise, she was excited to.  The last time he did so they ended up in Muskoka making love for an entire weekend.  She even offered to drive there, but he said that wouldn’t be necessary, because it would spoil the surprise.  So she hopped in the passenger’s seat.  They got on the highway.  And they travelled north.  Like, really north.  North of the city, to the suburb of Vaughan, where Bee noticed Morgan turn into the driveway of Pfaff Auto, where he had gotten his Porsche, a small smile on his face as they parked the car near the front.  

“What are we doing here?” she asked as he turned off the ignition.  

“What do you think?” he asked rhetorically.  

Before she could answer, Bee noticed a man in a suit outside Morgan’s window, and she nodded her head towards it so it could grab Morgan’s attention.  The man waved enthusiastically and Morgan opened the door.  “Santi!  Hey!”

“Morgan!  Nice to see you bud!” he said as Morgan opened the door.  “This must be Bee!” Santi waved at her.  “How are you Bee?”

“I’m…good,” she said awkwardly as she saw Morgan start to get out of the car.  She followed suit and walked around to where the men were standing.  

“Morgan mentioned how you had passed your driving test.  Congratulations!” Santi said.  “We thought it would be a great idea to bring you in and welcome you into the Pfaff Family!”

“Oh?” Bee looked between Santi and Morgan.  She stood stiff in between the two men.  “Am I…you…you didn’t bring me here to pick out a car, did you?” she asked Morgan, who only smiled.  “Morgan.”

“Don’t Morgan me,” he said, his response every single time she said his name in that tone of voice.  “Let’s go inside and see our options, hmm?”

Bee didn’t really have a choice.  They were already there, Santi was already smiling and waving and ready to show her cars, and when they walked inside, other employees waved and shook hands and it was all very nice, but Bee didn’t know what to do.  She wondered if anybody could see how out of her element she was.  She felt like a visiting Princess Kate being given a tour of something she had no clue about, smiling and nodding along and asking basic questions about things to make it seem like she understood what they were talking about and comfortable with what was going on around her.  But she wasn’t.  For a person who had never owned a car before, and who had only been in the very basic cars of her friends, she really didn’t have a clue.  She knew the names, obviously, but everything else was extra.  Everything else was so…extravagant.  

Santi was nice.  Warm.  Accommodating.  To his credit, he was an excellent salesman and knowledgeable of every little detail about every car or SUV they saw or sat in.  He would usher her into the driver’s seat, he’d get into the passenger’s seat, and Morgan would slip in the backseat, and he’d go on and on about all the features.  The leather seats.  The luxury interior.  The beeping sensors for when you were reversing.  GPS Navigation.  The backup cameras.  The sunroofs.  The option for add-on DVD players for the backseat.  Luxury add-ons here.  Luxury add-ons there.

Bee had to write down all the names of the cars so she could remember them all.  The Porsche Cayenne Sport, the Mercedes Benz GLS 450, the BMW X7 xDrive 50i, the Porsche Macan Sport, the BMW Alpina B7 xDrive, the Audi A8 L 55, the BMW M5 Competition, the Mercedes Benz S-Class.  It was all so overwhelming.  There were so many things to remember.  Santi didn’t even mention gas mileage.  He didn’t mention how much it cost to fill up a tank of gas, how expensive it was to insure these cars, how expensive they were even just to maintain.  She got more and more nervous the more she thought about it.  It filled her with anxiety, being in something that was so expensive.  

These cars weren’t for her.

“What’s the price point you’re looking for?” Santi asked as they sat together in the BMW X7.  It was a beautiful crossover, no doubt, and Bee liked it, as objectively as she could like a car this expensive.  

“We’re not thinking about that today,” Morgan butt in from the backseat.  Santi gave him a smile.  She looked at him through the rear-view mirror.  

“What a guy, eh?” Santi joked, nodding his head towards Morgan.  “We’ll take care of you guys, anyway.  When Chris comes in he’ll arrange all that.  He’ll be so happy to see you.”

“Who’s Chris?” Bee finally piped up.

“Chris Pfaff, the president and CEO,” Santi said.  “After Morgan and I chose the Porsche last year Chris made sure Morgan was taken care of.  And with Morgan referring some of the other Leafs to us, there’s no way we’re not going to take care of you again.”

Bee wondered what Santi meant when he said ‘take care’, but she knew if she asked she’d seem like an idiot.  Maybe it just meant they got a good deal on the car or something.  A discount.  An add-on for only half the price.  $100 in gas gift cards, like she always saw advertised on TV.  

After what seemed like sitting in the millionth car, Santi was called away briefly, leaving Morgan and Bee alone for the first time since they parked.  They stood beside an immaculate Range Rover.  Bee looked over at Morgan, who was already looking at her.  “What do you think?” he asked her.

“I don’t want to make a decision today,” she said, knowing he wouldn’t know why.  He seemed to be having the time of his life being in all the cars.  She never understood boys’ fascination with them.

“What?”

“I don’t want to make a decision today.  I don’t…” she shook her head slightly, biting on her nail.  “I want to think about it.”

“But they--”

“I want to do my own research,” she interrupted him, not wanting to get into it now.  “I just want to go home with all the information he gave me and I want to do my own research and make my own decision.”

Morgan looked at her for a moment.  He studied her.  He saw the biting of the nail and saw her furrowed eyebrows and he nodded his head.  “Okay.  Okay.  We’ll let Santi know.”

Santi gave Bee his card and told her to call him when she made her decision.  She thanked him endlessly for all his help and information, and she and Morgan left Pfaff, beginning the long trek back downtown to their place.  Bee sat looking out the window, not saying a word, mulling over everything going on inside her head.  Morgan would take occasional glances at her, allowing them to sit in silence until they pulled into the parking garage and into their designated spot.  He knew something was going on and he wanted to know.  

“What’s wrong?”

Bee felt ashamed.  She couldn’t even look at him even though she knew he was looking directly at her.  “I don’t want any of those cars,” she said, her voice barely above a whisper.

“What?”

“I don’t want any of those cars,” she said a bit louder so he could hear.  “I don’t…I don’t need any of those cars.”

“What do you mean you don’t need any of those cars?”

She sighed.  “I only need a car that can get me from A to B.  I’m not even going to drive it to work.  The most I’ll be driving it is up to Rocco and Clarette’s house or to go grocery shopping.  Maybe to go visit Aryne and John.  I don’t think I need a ninety thousand dollar SUV to do that.”

Morgan shifted in his seat.  “Okay…I get that,” he admitted.  “But…I mean, they can help us, you know?  The guys at Pfaff can take care of us.”

“Why do you guys keep saying that?  What does that even mean?” she asked, her voice more assertive now.  

“They can gift it to us, Briony.  Like the Porsche.”

Bee whipped her head towards Morgan.  “Gift it to us?  Like the Porsche?”

“Yeah.”

“You…” she couldn’t believe what she was hearing.  “You’re telling me this Porsche is a gift.”

“Yeah.”

“You don’t pay a lease payment on this thing?”

“No.”

“A financing payment?”

“No.”

“Are you fucking kidding me?!” she exclaimed.  “This entire fucking time we’ve been driving this car you haven’t had to pay a cent on it except for gas and insurance?” she asked.  Morgan nodded his head.  “What the fuck, Morgan?!”

“Why are you so angry?” he asked, remaining the calm one in the conversation.

“We don’t need a free car!” she yelled, unable to hold her emotions back any longer.  “We have the money to pay for a car!  We have the money to pay for any car we fucking want to and you’re telling me you’re paying nothing?!  We should be paying for a car!”

“What’s the big deal?” Morgan questioned.  

“It’s the principle!” she began.  “This is exactly what’s wrong with this entire fucking system.  I grew up with literally nothing by no fault of my own and I was still expected to pay my whole way through whatever came up in my life.  You – and I don’t mean you specifically Morgan, but people like you, other hockey players and those stupid Instagram influencer girls from here just dying to hang out with you guys for status and clout – you guys have all this money and yet you get everything for free so long as you put it on your Instagram.  It’s not fair.  It’s not fair when so many fucking people in this city are struggling to get by and working their asses off at minimum wage jobs just to afford rent and the Toronto Maple Leafs are getting free luxury cars.”

Morgan stayed quiet.  He knew she was right, like with most things, and he had never considered her perspective before.  He had failed to consider the entire situation from her perspective.  It was hard for him.  He just thought it would be a nice day out.  Go to a dealership, pick out a car.  He’d take care of it for her, like he promised her he would with everything on that dock in Muskoka.  And although she had accepted that, this wasn’t the way she wanted him to go about “taking care” of things.  She obviously wanted to do everything fairly.  “Briony…”

“I can’t believe you never told me this car was a gift,” she said, her voice much calmer now.  “Look, I’m sorry I raised my voice.  But we’re not poor.  We can afford the financing or lease payments on any car I choose to get.  And that’s the way it’s gonna be.”

“Okay,” Morgan nodded his head, his voice soft.  “Okay.  We can do that.”

“I can do that,” she corrected.  “I want to pay for my own car.  This entire time I’ve been saving my money and I can afford it.  I’ve budgeted it out.”

“But Briony--”

“Morgan--”

“I told you in Muskoka that I wanted to give you the things you want and need in life without you being uncomfortable about it.  That I didn’t want you to worry about anything ever again.”

“I know, Morgan, but please, please, you have to let me do this for myself.  Please,” she was practically begging.  “I know you want to do that for me.  I know.  That’s why you brought me to Pfaff today.  And I love you and I appreciate it and you know I do but I’m doing this for me.  You…you have no idea what it means to be to be able to buy my own car with my own money.”

Morgan could hear by the tone in her voice how much this meant for her.  He couldn’t deny that he wanted to do this for her – to get her whatever car she wanted, luxury or not – but he also couldn’t deny her the opportunity of being able to get a car herself.  For her, it was independence.  It was investing in something she never had the opportunity to before.  It meant having something of her own, when her whole life, she didn’t have anything to her name.  Who was he to deny her that?

“Okay,” he nodded his head again.  “Alright, okay.  I’m sorry Briony.”

“There is no need for you to apologize,” she said, reaching over the console to grab his hand.  “I should be the one who is sorry for raising my voice.  I just…I felt overwhelmed in there.  It was fun but overwhelming.  You’re the best boyfriend in the world for doing something like that for me.  You probably think I’m insane.”

“Why would I think that?”

Bee gave him a look.  “A girl rejecting a luxury car so she could get a cheaper one?  Who does that?”

Morgan smiled slightly, shaking his head.  He leaned over the console to give her a kiss.  “Briony McTavish does that,” he whispered once he pulled away.  “And that’s why I love her.”

“Oh yeah?” Bee smiled slightly.  

“Mhm,” Morgan kissed her again.  “You’re something else, Briony.  I’d do anything for you.  And this means so much to you.  You’ve put your mind to it.  You’ve budgeted it out and you know you’re going to be okay and that you won’t have to worry.  I would never take that away from you.”

Before their conversation could advance any further, Morgan’s phone started to ring through the Bluetooth system in the car.  On the screen on the dash, Nazem’s name flashed.  “We’ll continue this later,” he said before answering the call.  “Naz!  What’s up?  You’re on speaker with me and Bee.”

“Hey guys,” he said into the phone.  “You uh…you guys might want to make your way to Toronto General.”

“Why?” Morgan asked.  

From beside him, Bee’s jaw dropped.  “Ohmygod Naz, did Ashley have the baby?”

“Come quick.  Come meet her,” he said, a slight giggle in his voice.  

“Her?!” Bee screamed.  “Her?!  Ohmygod we’re on our way right now.”

***

“Here she is.  Baby Naylah,” Naz was smiling from ear to ear as he led Morgan and Bee through the doorway to Ashley’s room.  John and Aryne were already there, Aryne sitting in a chair and John leaning against the windowsill as Ashley cradled the tiny baby in her arms.

“Heeeyyyy,” Ashley said gently, a beaming smile on her face.  “She’s here.  She’s finally here.”

“Oh, Ashley…” Bee cooed, catching a glimpse of the little girl’s face tucked between the swaddling blanket and little hat on her head.  “Ashley, she’s absolutely beautiful.”

“How you feeling, momma?” Morgan smiled.  

“Labour was about eight hours, but everything was fine,” Ashley said.  “We came in yesterday around this time.  We’ve just been in our own little world with her until now.”

Morgan smiled and looked at Naz.  “Nazem Kadri, father,” he shook his head.  “Lord help us all.”

“That’s what I said,” John said as everybody laughed.  “Father to a girl, nonetheless.  She’s gonna make you the biggest sap in the universe.”

“She’s already got me wrapped around her little finger,” Naz shrugged his shoulders, admitting defeat.  He was still beaming, still on a high from welcoming his daughter into the world.  “I’ll admit it.  She’s gonna get whatever she wants.”

“You wanna hold her, Aunt Bee?” Ashley offered.  

Bee’s jaw dropped again.  “Oh my God.  Oh my God.  Can I?”

“She’s very calm.  She just woke up and might need a feeding soon so it’s your only chance,” Ashley smiled.  Bee moved closer towards her as Ashley placed Naylah delicately in her arms.  “Make sure you support her head.  She’s swaddled so she should be fine.”

Bee held Naylah close to her chest, rocking her back and forth.  She heard Naylah make little noises and watched as Naylah’s eyes looked up at her, studying her closely.  She knew this random, strange lady was definitely not her mom.  “Hi Naylah,” Bee cooed.  “I’m your Aunt Bee.  I’m so glad you’re finally here.”  She continued to look down at the tiny baby in her arms, marvelling at her little expressions and tiny features.  She couldn’t believe she was finally holding her.

Bee looked up briefly to see everybody smiling at her.  “Looks like you’re still the baby whisperer, Bee,” Aryne giggled, resting her hand on her bump.  “You’re gonna be back here in two months doing this all over again.”

“Bring it on,” she said, continuing to rock Naylah back and forth and cradling her small head in her hand.  “Give me all the babies and the babysitting duties and I’ll be one happy camper.”

As if on cue, Naylah began fussing a little bit, her eyes closing and lips pursing.  “Uh oh.  Spoke too soon,” Bee said.  She tried to calm her down but the attempt was futile.  Naylah continued to purse her lips until she let out a small cry.  “Looks like someone is hungry again.”

“That’s our cue,” Aryne said, standing up from her seat.  “We’ll wait outside until she’s done, maybe go grab some coffee.”

“I’ll let you guys know,” Naz said as they all began to exit.  “My sisters are coming back soon, too.  You might see them.”

John and Morgan decided to hang out in the waiting room while Aryne and Bee decided to go for a coffee run to the Starbucks.  As they were waiting for everybody’s drinks, Bee told Aryne what she and Morgan had been up to that day at Pfaff and the discussion they’d had in the car.  Bee explained her reasoning.  Morgan’s reaction.  Her insistence on getting the car on her own.  

Aryne sipped on her own coffee as she listened to Bee.  “You’ve always been really principled,” she said.  “You don’t need to apologize for anything.  I get where you’re coming from.  But I also understand where Morgan was coming from.  Especially after what you told me he said in Muskoka.  Like, I get him wanting to do that for you.”

“Me too,” Bee said.  “And I promised him I’d try to stop feeling uncomfortable about it.  And I have – I mean, the trip back to Vancouver and this bracelet are perfect examples of that,” she said, flashing the Cartier love bracelet that was still on her wrist.  “But I…a car is different.  I never thought I’d have a car.  Now I have an opportunity to get one.  I want to get one that’s economical.  I don’t want to get a BMW or Mercedes just because I can – well, just because Morgan can.  I can’t afford one of those cars on my own.  Morgan’s wanted me to save my money all this time anyway.  It’s only logical I use it to make the biggest purchase of my life thus far, right?”

“You don’t need to defend yourself, Bee, especially if it’s your own money,” Aryne said.  “Especially if it’s your own money.  Whatever you buy with what you’ve earned yourself is a big fuck you to everyone.  Car, designer bag, shoes, a book – whatever.  Fuck anybody who criticizes you.”

Bee was so thankful for Aryne.  Whenever she needed a voice of reason, someone to guide her through this crazy life and help her make decisions, she knew Aryne would always be there for her.  “You’re the best, you know that?” Bee smiled.

“You’ve told me that once or twice,” Aryne winked.  “Listen…on a similar vein of fuck-you purchases and people criticizing you, I need to ask you a question and I need you to be one hundred percent honest with me.”

Bee noticed her sudden shift in tone.  “Okay…”

“What did Sydney say to you?”

Bee was speechless.  “Wha…” she stuttered out.  “What do you mean?”

“I saw her comment on Morgan’s post for your graduation, and I saw what Morgan responded,” she explained.  “She had to have said something.  So what was it and when did she say it?”

Bee took a deep breath.  She wondered if she should just run out of the hospital to avoid this conversation.  “Aryne…she’s your friend.  I don’t feel comf--”

“What did she say, Bee?”

Bee gulped.  “Um, so it was the day of your baby shower,” Bee began.  “Ashley picked us up and we were driving through Moss Park to get on the DVP and she called it the ghetto.  When we came up on a red light I pointed out a building where I used to live and I told her how I grew up there and she was like ‘Well, thank God you got out’.”

“So that’s why Morgan made the ghetto comment,” Aryne connected the two together.  Bee nodded her head.  “How did Morgan find out?”

“Zach told him, sort of accidentally.  Because Alannah was there too and she was really upset about everything that happened and --”

“What else happened?” Aryne interjected.  Bee felt like crawling into a hole and dying.  “What do you mean ‘everything that happened’?  What else was there?”

“Um…I…” Bee tried to look for an escape.  “Listen.  Um, Morgan doesn’t know this part.  He only knows about the ghetto comment.  But Sydney…she, uh…she kind of kept making these comments…”

“About what?”

“About me.”

Aryne’s eyes darkened.  “What did she say.”

“It’s really not--”

“Briony,” Aryne’s voice was firm.  “What did she say.”

“It wasn’t a big deal, Aryne.  I dealt with it.  She uh, she sort of kept making, um, comments about my body.  Saying it was good that I chose that dress I wore with vertical stripes because they were slimming and that’s why it looked good.  And then Alannah asked about a deal on yoga pants I got and Sydney piped in and said she could recommend a personal trainer for me and that they’d ‘definitely help me with everything I need done’,” Bee used air quotes because she remembered the words said to her so vividly.  

“She said what?” Aryne seethed.  “Are you kidding me?”

“Aryne, it wasn’t a big deal.  I confronted her about it in the bathroom afterwards.  It was dealt with.”

“This happened during my baby shower?” she asked, her face utterly disgusted at what had transpired.  “What the hell is wrong with her?”

“Listen, I’m going to give her the benefit of the doubt.  She was stressed about the wedding and--”

“Don’t give her the benefit of the doubt.  God, Bee, do not give her the benefit of the doubt.  You’re being too nice.  She was my friend in Long Island and I’m absolutely horrified she’d say something like that to you.”

“It’s not…” Bee began, shaking her head.  “My mom used to say stuff like that all the time.  She used to tell me I’d end up alone because nobody likes smart chubby girls.  It’s okay.  And it’s not like I haven’t heard it before in DMs.  You know what they look like.”

Aryne gave her a look – one mixed with the anger she was feeling but also with sadness at what Bee was revealing.  Aryne couldn’t imagine a mother saying something like that to a daughter.  “Bee, just because your mom used to say that sort of stuff to you, it doesn’t make it okay,” she stressed, reaching out to hold her hand.  “Nobody deserves comments like that being said about them.”

“I know.  But when that sort of stuff is said to me, people who mean nothing to me always say it.  My mom.  Fangirls.  Sydney,” Bee said.  “I told her that.  I told her she meant nothing to me and that even if she didn’t like me she needed to respect me--”

“Good.”

“—and I told her not to take me for a fucking idiot,” Bee couldn’t help but smile.  She was still sort of proud of herself for pulling out that line in the washroom.  “I think Sydney thinks she needs to put on a mix of this ‘I don’t give a fuck’ and ‘I’m the Queen B cool girl’ persona because that’s the image she’s built for herself and she lets it get to her head.  The fact that she grew up with a lot of privilege hasn’t helped that.  But I dealt with it.  She got married and had a beautiful wedding.  I’m still chubby.  It’s done.”

“Okay, but wait…” Aryne furrowed her brows.  “Morgan only knows about the ghetto comment?  Why?”

“That’s all Zach told him.”

“And you didn’t tell Morgan what you just told me?” Aryne asked.  Bee shook her head.  “Why not?”

It was Bee’s turn to give Aryne a look.  “I’m sorry, have you met my boyfriend, Morgan Frederick Rielly?” she asked, causing Aryne to giggle.  “God knows what he’d say to Syd – or Matt – if he found out.  He’d drop a nuke on Long Island if he could.”

“He is really protective of you out in the public sphere,” Aryne digressed.

“Exactly.  He had to make a phone call to Steve Keogh on Canada Day to try and solve my incessant DM issue,” Bee informed Aryne, who already knew all about the DMs sent on Canada Day.  “Despite Morgan’s best efforts he couldn’t get Steve to fly back from Europe, where he’s on vacation with his family, to handle the situation immediately.”

Aryne snorted.  “What a guy.”

“You’re telling me.”

“So then what’s the next step?” Aryne asked, fixating all the drinks into the Styrofoam holder the barista provided.

“With what?” Bee asked.

“Everything.”

Bee shrugged her shoulders.  “Just live my life.”

***

@brionymctavish: my first car!

@angiefavs: WE MATCH!!!!!

@morganrielly: lookin cute

@alynntavares: LOVE IT BEE!  I know how much this means to you!

@enzosauce: can you drive it out to Edmonton for a visit?

@stephlanchancee: um is that a Honda Civic?

                       @brionymctavish: Yup!  First one ever!

@lucygardiner_: congrats Bee!  Can’t wait to zip around town with you!

@frederikandersen31: I hope I fit in there

                       @brionymctavish: I’ll stuff you into the trunk if need be

[bekahdoesnerdshit]

no one else has reblogged ask meme Mondays so I'm just going fucking apeshit with u. from the big boy: b7 for raini bc it's funny, c1 for cog bc it's inchresting, h3 for brilliance bc I know there's some gay shit going on and I want to hear more, then a17 (character proud of themselves or ur proud of ur rp as them) L5 and L6 for whomsoever u want to talk about

I won’t need a readmore for this one, I tell myself. There’s not that many questions, and they’re not proseboys. I was a fool. She’s too long to be allowed to run on people’s dashboards unrestrained 😔 Thank you! For going apeshit!!

Raini

B7. How do they respond to babies crying in public? I guarantee the image you have for how Raini would react to a crying baby is 10000% correct. She’s unhappy. Uncomfortable. Unimpressed. Can you please make that thing be quiet. Why did you have it if you can’t mange it. This is why she’s never having kids. Like she’s not gonna say anything to the parents or shoot them dirty looks, because she’s not that specific flavor of asshole, but she’s going Mind Her Business and vacate the premises if possible. People who want to take care of something should just get a cat. Goddamn. There is ONE (1) baby that may qualify for an exception, and that’s Red. This is because (and please, picture Raini, the absolute picture of ‘fed up’, squatting down to look a fussy Red in the eye while she says this) “Baby Lent. You’re better than this. I know you are, and you’re letting me down. You need to stop making that noise.” This is unrelated to the question, but please also picture a Raini who was asked (blackmailed?) into babysitting using her Mage Hand to change Red’s diaper. It has nothing to do with the question but I think it’s a Very funny mental image. Thank you.

Cog

C1. Does your OC have a moral code? If not, how do they base their actions? If so, where does it come from, and how seriously do they take it? Absolutely! The way Cog approaches the world is defined by three main mantras: - Kindness is a discipline, not a character trait. - Doing the right thing isn’t always easy, but it is always worth doing. - If you are able to help someone, you have an obligation to do so. Between these three things, Cog sees the world in pretty black and white terms. There are right decisions, and wrong ones. The difference between the two is usually clear to anyone who cares to look, and so most of the evil in the world is born of selfishness. Consequently, Cog does very poorly in morally grey situations. She will commit without hesitation to any course of action that she deems “right” and “kind” no matter how drastic or dangerous it is, but she pretty much shuts down the second she’s faced with a decision that has consequences for someone regardless of what she does.  I’m sure that has not, and will not, come in her life ever at all. Ahah!  I think originally, this worldview was born of naivety. She grew up that religious kind of super sheltered where everything in the secular world was dangerous and dirty, and so when Cog began to realize that definitely wasn’t the case she made the choice to intentionally see the best in people and the world around her to fight what she was told growing up. When she started traveling with her party and actually seeing more of the world than the extremes of a) shitty cult town b) shiny clean magic school, she began to realize that the true state of the Wasteland was somewhere between what her Mama had told her and what she wanted to believe it was. But I’ve never in my life made a character who is stubborn as hell deep down, so instead of letting the world she found herself in change her Cog took a deep breath, rolled up her sleeves, and settled in to be the one changing it by loving and helping the people around her.

Brilliance

H3. Does your OC believe there’s only one ideal partner (or multiple ideal if not monogamous) for everyone, or that there are many people who could be right? I think Brilliance absolutely adores the idea of two people being made for one another. Two souls, wandering the world looking for one another? Who slot together so perfectly that when they find each other it’s clear they never could have fit anywhere else? Bruh. Yes, she knows love takes work. Sometimes you and your partner are going to disagree, and sometimes there’s going to be conflict. The world isn’t “love at first sight” then smooth sailing for the rest of your life. But you put in the work to make your lives better, together, because the universe gave you this person to care for. Maybe there are many people who you could be happy with, and those relationships aren’t anything to look down on. But when you find The One, Brilliance thinks, you know. She certainly did.

Don’t Worry About It

A17. What’s one of your OC’s proudest moments of themselves? Gonna hijack this question to talk about rp moments I’m proud of because Alex sorta kinda gave me permission to do that! Alright! For Raini, the biggest rp moment I’m proud of was her “I’m getting our memories back” speech a few sessions ago, specifically the line, “We’ve been fighting with one hand tied behind our backs for too long. If we’re going to die fighting this thing, I want to know exactly what I’m fighting for.” Morgan and I had been planning to kick off our return from July Hell Hiatus with Wish Two for a couple of days, which meant I was lucky enough to be able to spend a little while planning what to say. I feel like that line in particular embodies Raini’s unwavering confidence in her magic, her determination, and her specific brand of caring for the people around her without actually admitting that’s what she’s doing. I also really liked the way the scene of her apologizing to the party for being Bitchy post losing Magic for a minute went! Idk if anyone else remembers it, because it was pretty short in game, but! I thought it was a very good moment of Raini finding the most Roundabout way to say “thank you for looking out for me while I was defenseless”.  If I can pat myself on the back a little, my Cog monologues kick Ass. The most recent one was when she was talking to Ace about how War is Bad (radical, I know) and there was a moment where she looked at him and said, “...I’m not going to ask for your help, because I don’t know what I’ll do if I do and you say no.” Which. OOF. That was her and I realizing in real time that she and Ace were very much on different sides of this issue. When the session ended everyone said they Loved how good and hurtful that conversation was and I :’) Also, there was a really small moment when Cog was pleading for Maelo’s life (when Sunny’s dad had him locked in a cat carrier. It’s a Long story, made slightly better by the fact that Maelo was wildshaped into a cat at the time) and Cog went Straight for the dad heartstrings by sniffling and asking if, please, would Robert at least let her say goodbye to her friend before he killed him? Please? 😢  She is using her baby face for EVIL!  And oh my god how could I forget! Arcane Timeout! When the party went back to New Alexandria and was confronted by Ace for helping a prisoner escape (which, in fairness, Maelo did do) and Cog brought the encounter screeching to a halt by casting Wall of Stone to make a timeout hut with herself and Ace inside. She then sat herself down, looked Ace dead in the eye, and told him that the wall wasn’t coming down until he actually talked to her, or until he broke her concentration on the spell. She banked hard on him not being willing to hurt her, and it paid off. There were tears all around, both in and out of character. It was Wonderful. Also! I do just want recognition for the fact that I did not give into my impulses to be a little Shit as Cog last session by subtle casting Heal in Ace’s face after he Counterspelled my Healing Word. it was what I Rebekah wanted to do more than anything; unfortunately Cog is a better person than I am. There is No worse feeling than wanting so badly to do something you have no choice but to admit isn’t in character. Rip.  For whatever reason, all of my favorite Brilliance rp moments came during combat. Pressing her forehead to Sabre’s after he died in silent grief, forcefully taking a Narzugon off his Nightmare and then using Misty Step to mount it herself and take off after her friend, planting herself in the chokepoint of a hallway to stare down three minotaurs so she could keep her party safe behind her, pushing deeper into the hellwasp nest to rescue Dembe and Sabre despite knowing that doing so all but destroyed her chance of making it out alive, the list goes on. There were good out of combat moments too (despite the rest of the party’s best efforts 🙄), but I feel like for once I made a character who really shone in combat.  oh GOD I just remembered one really really good rp moment, when our rogue Zihro died when he got separated from the party during combat. We finished taking care of the main devil we were fighting, then began searching the dungeon for Zihro and the npc he was with. We, instead, found both of their corpses. Dembe looked to Brilliance, our healer, and demanded to know why she was just standing there instead of fixing their friend. We were only level three or four at the time, so Brilliance had to tell Dembe, again and again, that she couldn’t fix Zihro. It was too late, she wasn’t powerful enough yet, her goddess wouldn’t answer a prayer like that- It was a rough scene, and without question one of the best rp moments I’ve had with that group. Tae, if you’re reading this, you’re the only one with rights. Also, please unfollow this blog immediately.  Now as a quick pick-me-up after that mess, Pip’s best rp moment was when our barbarian Durokal -who couldn’t read and had a habit of running off and causing Problems- found a plaque he could tell had five words on it, and called Pip over to read it for him when Pip finished chasing him down. Pip, annoyed and out of breath and all of two feet tall, looked up at this 7 foot half-orc and told him, “It says: I’m. Gonna. Kick. Your. Ass.” Also, he regularly called very powerful figures in Barovia by sweet nicknames with “Mr.” in the front. As a sign of Respect. Because he’s the Best. sdfhsdkfj he also he couldn’t think of a fake name quick enough one time so he told an npc that is name was Dick and he was Very embarrassed about it. She: bought it!

Brilliance, Again

L5. Which OC do you think is the most decent morally or behaviorally?  AKA, which is supposed to a “good guy”? The answer is Cog, but we already went in depth on her morals this ask. She’s HAD enough screen time let’s move on. Brilliance is the only other character who, if asked, would say they saw themselves as a good guy instead of just “a person”. She strives to do right by the people around her, and to protect the light and beauty found in the world. She doesn’t have the same illusions about the world wanting to be a good place that Cog does, and she very much understands that sometimes the best thing you can do for the world is to put the things that make it dangerous six feet under. What’s interesting I think is that, despite being a paladin, she isn’t Lawful Good! She’s Neutral Good, because you know what? She wants to do the right thing, and laws aren’t always right. It’s up to you, as a person with a mind and free will and agency, to look at a situation and decide what you think is the right thing to do. And, for Brilliance, generally the right thing to do is heft her sword, raise her shield, and face trouble head on.

Raini, Once More

L6. Which OC do you think is the worst morally or behaviorally? AKA, which is supposed to be a “bad guy”? I don’t have any evil aligned characters, because I personally find things like “getting along with my party members” sexy, but the character who’s the shittiest and the worst is obviously Raini. She’s not a bad person per say, she’s just selfish and results oriented. Very much “the ends justify the means” and in a party like hers she’s aware that somebody has to be the bad guy sometimes, and she’s not afraid to make sure that’s her. She’s also very very likely to fall victim to her hubris making her feel like she definitely knows what’s best, and acting on that maybe without consulting other people (see: the whole fucking premise of the campaign). She sees a goal, she sees a way to accomplish that goal, so why shouldn’t she begin taking the necessary steps to reach it? I think the events of the game have mellowed this flaw out a little bit, but you can still see traces of it in the way she, for example, wordlessly handed Lent a bunch of diamonds before launching her consciousness into the Abeast and very nearly dying in there without consulting with the party first. It happens!  Also, behaviorally, she’s just. I mean. She’s like that. The worst. And that, I promise, will never change. 

[captain-aralias]

End of Year in Fandom meme

i know on tumblr the tradition is to post a list and then wait for people to ask you before just telling them all your thoughts... but i come from livejournal where we answer all the questions. 

here are my thoughts about the things that i really liked in 2019. 

if no one reads it, that’s cool! if you do read it - that’s cool too. please talk to me about any of these things. i have strong feelings about them.

Your main fandom this year?

this was, of course, 'carry on'. now there are two books, it might be time to start trying to call the fandom 'the simon snow books', but i don't think it's going to stick.

it's a nice fandom. not overwhelmingly big, but active enough that it's engaging. lots of people's first fandom.

Your favourite film watched this year?

movies is where i'm weakest now music has been removed from the list because i'm been watching long-running TV instead of 2-hour things, mostly.

i really liked the netflix christmas movie 'klaus' - but i would say, my favourite movie was 'steven universe - the movie' which is notable in that it's a movie of a TV show, but for reals. it was SO GOOD. i thought the structure worked really well as a movie, and the fact that it was longer than 10 minutes meant we got lots of proper-length songs :D

Your favourite book read this year?

ok! this is easier. i read lots of great books this year, mostly pratchett. many of which i think i've read before, but my memory is bad and it was a long time ago. there were only a few that i really really felt like i'd read before, like 'night watch' and 'going postal - which are still my favourite-favourites.

the best ones i either hadn't read before at all or remembered very little of were 'wee free men' and the 'amazing maurice'. also, all the middle vimes books - like, had i read 'the fifth elephant' before? i don't know. but it rocked.

also this year - there was a new 'invisible library' book (genieve cogman) which was about a heist (i love it!), two new 'murder most unladylike' (robin stevens), and right at the beginning of the year, 'the wicked king' (book 2 of 'the folk of the air' by holly black - who has never fully worked for me until this series. now it's amazing'.

'wayward son' was my most anticipated book, but it wasn't my favourite of the year even tough i have three copies of it, plus the audiobook, plus the kindle book. i feel for it in a different way than i feel for other books as it is my fandom and it's special to me in a way none of the other books are. it's also not bad, like some anticipated things have been - it just wasn't exactly what i wanted.

but, you know - bring on 'any way the wind blows'. it's set at watford. i am down for that.

Your favourite tv show of the year?

TOO MUCH CHOICE, ARGH.

2019 was, for me, the year of (animated) television shows that blew my mind with how much i loved them. if i had to choose one... i'd have to go for 'ladybug' but it's a tough call.

i love 'ladybug', even though it's a monster of the week show for kids that is written in another language and dubbed. somehow it transcends this and is SO GOOD and fun.

closely followed by:

steven universe (of course)

mob psycho 100. (how the hell did it get so good so fast? the first episode was like, eh, i guess this fine, and then it was about FRIENDSHIP, and growing up, and compassion.)

my hero academia (a late entry, i literally watched it last week. SO GOOD OMG)

yuri on ice!!!

haiyku!!

i also really enjoyed/am enjoying 'she-ra' and i'm enjoying 'the dragon prince'.

did we watch anything that had real people in it? yes. (i also watched a lot of starkid musicals - which doesn't fit anywhere on the list). but it wasn't as good.

Your best new fandom discovery of the year?

see above.

all the anime and ladybug are all massive fandoms/massive megafandoms that i'd never heard of because i am an ignorant westerner (this is what tumblr is good for, to be fair to it - forcing you to interact with random stuff that people who share one of your interests are also interested in - i have found many things that i like from seeing gifs of them). i read some yuri fic but i didn't want it to suck me in, before i was read to leave 'carry on'... so i backed away. i haven't read any 'ladybug' fic for the same reason.

and i dont ship stuff in BNHA so what's the point? (except maybe all might/eraser head, but i think maybe that' because i like them both the most as characters and they've been in some scenes together. and are adults. and all might is really gay - not a good reason to write fic) (or is it?) (no - i've got lots of 'carry on' stuff to write......)

Your biggest fandom disappointment?

it feels like the answer should be 'wayward son' after what i wrote above, but i wasn't actually disappointed at all, if that makes sense. although i wanted to be filled with overwhelming love, i didn't expect it - it was more like i was desperate to read the book (particularly because loads of people got it early, but i didn't) and my head was just full of white noise for weeks during september. even things like the 'steven universe' movie coming out didn't stop my brain saying 'WHERE IS WAYWARD SON???'

and then when i got it was like - yeah, this is all right - not my favourite, but now i know what happens i can process it. what a relief.

ok! i know what my actual biggest disappointment was - i REALLY wanted to like the new 'his dark materials'. it looked great! it was long - which i thought would mean it would be good. i had lin manuel miranda in it!

but i didn't get past the first episode. it just had far too many random boring scenes, and james mcavoy was all wrong for asriel, and i just hated it.

Your tv boyfriend of the year?

HMMMM... as usual, i love too many. (erin is well aware of this terrible state of affairs - if there's a rubbish and yet strangely competent stringey man in something, she knows i will like them too much).

i probably feel closest to adrien agreste, even though reigen arataka (mob psycho) is exactly my type.

and let's not even talk about how beautiful viktor nikiforov is. it should not be allowed.

Your tv girlfriend of the year?

this one is easier (alas indeed - we watch television programmes about MEN). it's marinette dupain-cheng. she is so smart and kind!

also - the worst witch wasn't very good this year (so it didn't get on the list, see above), but hectate hardbroom is still great.

and, of course, i have always loved the doctor. is it right to put the doctor here? people have started using non-binary pronouns now. idk - i'm going to say she's a woman right now.

Your biggest squee moment of the year?

eeeeer.........

renaissance faire sword fight in 'wayward son' maybe? (it was about 7am, i can't really remember but i think i was happy)

or something like - spoilers - the end of the most recent season of haikyu!! you'd think - surely the heroes will win, but what i've learned in anime is that sometimes... they don't. and so i was genuinely invested in whether or not they would get into the nationals. and THEY DID!!!!

The most missed of your old fandoms?

B7 - i definitely miss it more than doctor who, athough obviously i did go back for thirteen. (i liked the series - it was perfectly nice, and i was one of the people who didn't want a female doctor because the doctor's always been a rubbish man and i thought that was part of his thing. but now that there is a female doctor i'm much more like - shit, i wish i was the doctor, but i guess she's really good. the episodes themselves are just fine, though. it doesn't make me fannish)

i wrote a thing for 'blake's 7' because i was asked to by someone who is really lovely, and i met up with mrsunderhill from tumblr and we talked about fic stuff - and she told me that a lot of russian-speaking fandom followed me from doctor who to B7, which i did not know. (hello russian-speaking fans, if you are here).

but it was hard going - i realised i'd lost the knack, but also how great the show is. i probably won't read any more who fic unless it's by people i know, but i would still read B7.

just probably not anymore 1990s gen. i started selling the zines that i know i'm not interested in.

The fandom you haven’t tried yet, but want to?

i already said 'don't tempt me, frodo!'

i'll go looking once i'm fed up with 'carry on' and not before.

[wanderrlex]

Nutrition for Mental Health!!!

Hi guys, its been a while.

I took a brief hiatus from writing because I wasn’t quite sure what I wanted to say. Things in my life got a little chaotic and though most of it was fun, a lot of it wasn’t. Kelby’s court case was an emotional roller coaster and on August 6th he was charged with a felony kidnapping charge and proceeded to serve less than half of his futile 3 month sentence. I worry every day for the woman who falls for his trap next. I feel powerless in stopping him from hurting again. And I feel betrayed by the court system. I told them directly in my testimony that they had the chance to save a life, because he had threatened to kill me and two other women he had been involved with.

Beyond that, this month is the 10 year anniversary of the events that started my PTSD. I am also doing my psychiatric rotation for nursing school and coming, quite literally, face to face with kids in the same situations that almost ended my life. It is shocking how cyclical everything is, that 10 years to the day later I would be on the other side of the mirror, trying to treat kids who are battling the same demons I was so long ago.

That being said, I wanted to share with you guys some really interesting information I was made aware of by a nutritionist who works in the psychiatric hospital I have been placed in. I had no idea how much our diet can affect mental health and was shocked to learn all of the things I could be doing every day to help offset or address my own mental health struggles.

***I am in no way saying that, by implementing these food practices, medications are no longer needed. Never stop taking your medications before talking to your doctor. This is just helpful tricks to use alongside medications that can help treat or prevent conditions.***

The first category I want to hit on is Vitamins. There are a few key vitamins that have been directly related to depression, anxiety, PTSD, and bipolar disorder. They are the B vitamins 1-9 and B12 and Vitamin D. Vitamin D is mainly delivered through exposure to the sun, but there are also plenty of supplements for it as well as whole milk. The B vitamins are essential for energy production, neurotransmitter creation and detoxification. Those suffering from fatigue, depression, anxiety, and addiction may have low B-vitamin status. You can get B vitamins from green leafy veggies, beans, fruits, chicken and sea food. I’ve listed the correct forms of all the B vitamins below. If you purchase B vitamins and they do not match these names they are a weaker or even false form of the vitamin and will not benefit your health. The best brand name on the market right now is Jarrow, they sell a range of supplements and are very well trusted by nutritionists. If you can find any of these as a lozenge, that is the most effective delivery system of B vitamins. They still work if taken orally, but it weakens them. So lozenges actually allow them to absorb through the gums and bypass the stomach all together.

B1: thiamin mononitrate 25mg ****best for drug/alcohol detox****

B2: Riboflavin 25mg

B3: Niacinamide 100mg

B5: Pantothenic Acid/Calcium pantothenate 25 mg

B6: P5P 25mg ******best for depression******

B7: biotin 3000 mcg

B9: folate or methylfolate (not folic acid) 400 mcg

B12: methylcobalamin 200 mcg

The next category is hugely important: Omega 3’s. Omega 3’s are essential to brain function. Your brain is almost 80% fat and omega 3’s are the building blocks of that brain fat. They also help reduce inflammation in the body and brain which can be linked to mental illness.

These are not to be confused with Omega 6’s. Omega 6’s are in extreme excess in our diets to an almost toxic level. Corn, which is in almost everything we eat and fed to almost all of the animals we farm (including farmed fish), turns into Omega 6’s when it gets into our digestive track. Omega 6’s cause inflammation, and while they are healthy in small amounts, the average American is eating 600x more Omega 6’s than needed. Which means that we are very inflamed! The more corn (and corn fed beef/chicken/pigs/fish) you can cut out of your diet, the better.

BACK TO THE 3’s: You can get Omega 3’s by eating WILD caught fish, walnuts, flaxseed, chia seeds, grass fed meats, and pasture raised eggs (the yolk will be a bright orange color instead of a dull yellow). If you supplement with fish oil for your Omega 3’s, make sure it is from wild caught fish- and preferably small fish (makrel, sardines, etc).

Moving on, probiotics (the good bacteria in your gut) are essential to mental health because these healthy microbes help us assemble neurotransmitters and help boost immunity. And we are not joking around here kids- 80% of the serotonin and dopamine in your body are synthesized by microbiome in your gut and then sent to the brain.  You can get probiotics from fermented foods such as yogurt, kefir, sauerkraut, kombucha, and kimchee. These foods, however, don’t even begin to touch the recommended daily dose of 80 billion microbes a day. The only real way to meet this is to take a probiotic twice daily (don’t worry- Jarrow makes these too). Fiber from fruits and veggies feed your bacteria buddies so make sure you’re getting enough of those too!  

MINERALS: These things are the spark plugs pf every enzymatic activity in your body and brain. We cannot bioproduce (create ourselves) these minerals- they have to be in either your food or water. More specifically, Magnesium deficiencies are rampant. A deficiency may result in depression, anxiety, sleep disturbances, constipation, heart palpitations, and muscle cramping/restless legs. High magnesium foods are spinach, swiss chard, dark chocolate, pumpkin seeds, and almonds. OR OR OR !!!! You can also get tons of magnesium from Epsom salt baths. The best forms of magnesium supplements are: Magnesium glycinate (best for anxiety), magnesium citrate/chelate. Normal doses are 200 to 1,000 mg and should be taken at night.

Zinc is also a huge player here. We love Zinc. Zinc deficiencies frequently leads to depressive thoughts and is critical for improving cell signaling to the brain as well as skin and mouth health, digestion, and immunity. High amounts of zinc are found in oysters (YUM), lamb(grass fed y’all), cashews, pumpkin seeds and garbanzo beans (hummus yusssss). The best forms of zinc are zinc aspartate, zinc chelate, zinc citrate and you should take 15-60mg a day. If you can find zinc lozenges, that is the best way to take it as it (like the B vitamins) is made less powerful in the gut.

OKAY OKAY OKAY that was a lot of info. Bottom line is, pay attention to your diet. And if you have mental health struggles like me, maybe consider purchasing some supplements and addressing your mental illness from both the medical angle as well as the natural angle. I just thought this info was way too cool not to give to you guys. 

Lex out. Love you.

[abdigiles7]

Simple And Logical Advice On Becoming A Good Parent

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[luxremodelscompany]

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[jaelijn]

SPN Spoilers for 15x20. Under the cut again because I won’t tag it because tumblr messed up the tag system and now *everything* shows up. This is not a happy post. Apparently I still have a lot of feelings about this show that I have only really “watched” through tumblr for the last couple of years.

I’ve always been someone who reserved judgement on SPN before seeing the episode, and someone who found episodes “not that horrible” frequently. But I have to put down my thoughts about what I gather about that final episode, because yes, I am upset. And I want to explain why, also for the people who are watching this from the sidelines and think this is the same kinda upset about TV shows that is based only on shipping (as it was with Sherlock). Because it *isn’t*.

Firstly, you are allowed to have liked the episode. I suspect that if I had watched it, I would have been swept away by the emotions and have found it “not that bad”, too. I have seen people who I respect a lot say they found it “not that bad”, and I respect that. You are allowed to have liked the episode.

But with some emotional distance, I am upset about what happened.

Three weeks ago after 15x18 I said something to the effect of if Cas dying gets Dean to see that he is a good person actually (as he did in 15x19 as far as I gather), it might have been worth it. A fitting ending for Castiel - a final gift to the Dean Winchester he has always loved.

Now 15x20 comes along, kills Dean off and takes away his chance of doing anything with this realisation in his life. It ruins the culmination of 15 YEARS of character development based around Dean’s desire to be more than a hunter. To not die a hunter. To not die with only his brother around. To have a family and a normal life.

Look, here is the thing. I don’t have an issue with tragedy. Blake’s 7 has one of my favourite endings, and it literally does not get more tragic. But the whole point of the ending of B7 is that it could not have happened that way without everything that happened in the 4 seasons before it. It is a direct consequence of what happened to those characters during the show. For a show that is 40 years old when overarching season arcs where RARELY a thing, that is fucking impressive.

SPN’s ending is not that. It literally could have happened that way 15 years ago. It could be the ending of S1. That is not how character development should work. Callbacks are nice and all, but for an ending to be satisfying - even if it is tragic - it has to follow on from the character development that happened. Everything else is unfair to those characters.

So I’m upset. I’m upset for Dean. Dean, who was my first favourite character before Cas was a thing. 

I’m also upset for Cas. Because with Dean dying like that, Cas’s death had very little point. I’m glad he got to make his love for Dean explicit.

But the fact that he died afterwards, even if it has nothing to with him being queer, and that he does not come back into the show even A LITTLE *is* homophobic, *is* blatantly “bury your gays”, *is* queerbaiting for the final two episodes. Because if it weren’t, Misha would have been allowed to say that yes, it was his final scene. That yes, Cas was dead dead. Misha would have been allowed to say goodbye. And this show fucking Misha over isn’t new, but this really takes the cake and I am so sorry on his behalf. I’m just glad that my viewing of 15x20, if I ever do, will not contribute to any network ratings and if I can help it will not get the CW any money.

Dean’s death by IMPALEMENT if all things makes it worth, considering that the character is heavily coded bi / queer, too. So I’m also sorry on Jensen’s behalf. I often disagreed with Jensen in the past, but he put a lot of work into Dean’s development. For it to not matter for the ending is horrendous.

Am I sad that Dean and Cas didn’t get back together? Yes. But compared to all the other shit, it really is a minor point.

So yes, I am also upset for shipping-related reasons, but I am by far the most upset about the fact that the ending erased 15 years of character development, leaving it entirely without even a shred of payoff.

It was nice to see Bobby again. I love Bobby. I’m glad to see him. But for years this show has been about extending the brothers’ family. It has been about found family. It has been about letting go of toxic roots and relationship constellations and finding a better, more hopeful future, a better way. This is what the Winchesters fought for.   Why could the ending not reflect this?

Now your life's no longer empty Surely heaven waits for you

Carry on, my wayward son There’ll be peace when you are done

Yes. They are dead. But this is not the peace these characters deserved. They deserved to LIVE a life that was no longer empty.

And perhaps Sam got that, a little bit of that. But also, if we don’t AT LEAST headcanon Sam’s wife as being Eileen, what even is the fucking point? (Add ableism to the queerbaiting and homophobia, why don’t you???)

The weirdest thing about this is that from what I gather the episode written by SPN’s worst writers that was 15x19 was a better ending. At least it left more options open.

Knowing fandom, we will fix the ending or ignore it. I am glad this nonsense was the final episode - that makes it easier to ignore. We can just keep going as if 15x19 was it, or perhaps 15x18.

I trust that the SPN fandom will continue to do what it has always done: Take the canon that can be rubbish and can be upsetting and make it something more than it is.