#toronto maple leafs fan fic

[spine-buster]

Lost in the Memory | Ryan O'Reilly | Volume III

gif credit @/heddy

A/N: This is just porn, basically.

“It’s gonna be good to be fuckin’ home, I can tell you that much.”

A delay at the airport meant that Ryan and the boys didn’t land in Toronto until the middle of the night.  Factoring in the drive from the airport to Summerhill, he didn’t walk through the door until almost 2:30 in the morning.  He walked in to the low hum of the TV, an old episode of Law and Order: SVU playing.  Whitney was asleep on the couch, clearly having tried to wait up for him, but failing.  She looked cozy under the blanket, and so peaceful that Ryan almost didn’t want to disturb her.

Though he had been living in the house since being traded, for what felt like the first time since he moved, he took a long look around the main floor.  It had been Whitney’s and Whitney’s alone for the past ten days.  Truthfully, it had been Whitney’s and Whitney’s alone since he bought it for her.  When he bought it, he did so because when he and Whitney saw it, she fell in love with it.  It reminded her of the house she grew up in, just that it was in a city, and Ryan wanted her to have it.  During the restoration and renovation, and over the years, she had truly put her mark on it.  Her stamp was everywhere, and that’s what he loved most about it.  It was a home for her, and it was a home for him, too, because wherever Whitney was, was home. 

Ryan bent down so he could be near eye contact with her, taking in her features.  Her beautiful long lashes she’d had since they were kids.  The littlest scar on her chin from when Owen accidentally hit her with a ministick.  Her perfectly shaped lips he loved to kiss whenever he could.  Her long, beautiful hair he loved to run his hands through.  He did just that, as softly as he could, to wake her up.  “Whitney…sweetness…” he cooed.  She didn’t wake up at first.  “Sweetness…” he was slightly louder.

Her eyes fluttered open, looking almost in disbelief that he was in front of her.  “Snook…” she mumbled.

“Let’s go to bed,” he said.

“I tried to stay up, Snook—”

“—Don’t apologize, sweetness.  It’s okay.  Let’s just go to bed.  C’mon,” he said, grabbing at her arms and wrapping them around his neck.  He proceeded to pick her up bridal style and carry her up the stairs to her bedroom.  Their bedroom.

Whitney was smart and had already changed into her pajamas.  After he laid her in bed, Ryan stripped out of his clothes quickly, leaving only his boxers on before her crawled into bed and pulled the sheets and comforter over their bodies.  “D’you want me to make you some French toast tomorrow morning?” she asked.

“Shhhhhh,” he cooed, snuggling up behind her as the big spoon.  She had work tomorrow, so he didn’t even know why she was offering.  Well, that was a lie…he did know: because she was Whitney.  And they always looked after one another.  But he wasn’t going to be that person – waking her up at 2am only to agree for her to wake up early to make him breakfast.  What was he, a chauvinist?  “Go to sleep, sweetness.  Don’t worry about tomorrow morning.”

He heard a little sigh leave her.  “I’m so happy you’re finally home, Snook.”

“Me too.  Me too.”

***

When Whitney got home from work that Monday, Ryan was making dinner.  She walked into the house smelling like homemade chicken soup, which she loved.  It reminded her of growing up.  And though she was grown up now, she was always nostalgic for her past; she thought most people were, especially if they enjoyed their childhoods.

“Welcome home,” Ryan was already looking over his shoulder at her as she made her way into the kitchen. 

“Thanks,” she smiled.  “Damn Snook, I could get used to this.”

He smiled.  “Smells good?”

“When you’re my husband I hope the house smells like this all the time.”

Whitney didn’t realize exactly which words were leaving her mouth when she opened it.  But when they finally came out, she couldn’t believe her mind strung the sentence together.  It was as if her innermost thoughts were starting to overpower her conscience.  She watched as Ryan chuckled slightly.  “I have some good news,” he immediately changed the subject.

Whitney gulped, pushing everything down.  “What’s that?”

“I get my cast off soon,” he revealed.

Whitney smiled wide.  “You can finally put that hand back to good use.”

“You mean, like, by scoring goals?”

“Obviously.  It’s not like it’s useful for much else.”

Whitney yelped as Ryan grabbed hold of her and pulled her towards his body, wrapping his arms around her midsection so she couldn’t escape.  “You take that back right now,” he grumbled playfully.  “These hands have probably done more to pleasure you than your own hands.”

“You severely underestimate how I often I masturbate to the thought of you fucking me,” she kept playing her game.

“You’re a sexual deviant.”

“You started it,” she winked.

Ryan peppered her face with kisses.  “I’m so happy to be home with you, sweetness.  How was work?”

I’d rather be taking care of our kids right now.  “It was fine.  Same old.  Can we cuddle on the couch tonight while watching episodes of SVU?”

Ryan smiled.  “I don’t want to do anything else.”

After eating their chicken soup and cleaning up the kitchen, Ryan queued up episodes of Law and Order while Whitney washed her makeup off and changed into something more comfortable.  When she emerged from the bedroom, Ryan was already on the couch and ready with a blanket.  She was wearing a pair of bike shorts and one of Ryan’s newest Leafs workout shirts.  While it was no doubt big on her, it was tight around her chest, making it very obvious she wasn’t wearing a bra and very obvious she’d appreciate the warmth of his body and the blanket.  The Adam’s apple in his throat bobbed dramatically when he saw her.  Without even trying, she was so incredibly sexy to him. 

“Ready?” she asked.

He nodded.  “C’mere, sweetness,” he opened up the blanket, allowing her to crawl in and snuggle up next to him, draping her legs over his.  After placing one of his hands in between her thighs, he pressed play. 

It was about halfway through the first episode they watched that Ryan’s hand began massaging between Whitney’s thighs.  She didn’t think much of it – he massaged her thighs all the time when they were cuddling like this – but then ever so slowly it began to move up.  By the time the second episode started, his hand was right near her core.  She looked over at him at one point, a small smile playing on her face.  “You can put your hand down my shorts, Snook.  It’s been ten years – you don’t have to ask for permission.”

“Yes I do,” he said quickly, moving his hand quickly so it slipped underneath the waistband of her shorts and back down to between her thighs.  He cupped her core briefly before his fingers played with her lips.  Slowly.  Painstakingly slowly.  As they watched the next episode, he teased her pussy much longer than Whitney was anticipating, though she wasn’t complaining.  Eventually, she almost couldn’t focus between her hero Olivia Benson and what Ryan was doing.  She’d close her eyes to focus on the feeling, then open them to focus on the show, rotating back and forth.

“Snook?”

“Sweetness?”

“You coming to Toronto was the best thing to ever happen,” she sighed out, her eyes closed.

He giggled at her words.  “Oh yeah?”

She let out another sign.  “Can we…” she began before trailing off.

“Tell me sweetness.  What do you want?”

“D’you remember when I came to visit you in St. Louis the first time after you won the Cup and we—we were cuddling on your couch watching TV and we—we—”

“Lie down,” he whispered, knowing exactly what she was referencing.  “Get comfortable, sweetness.”

His hand left her hot core as she lay down on the couch how she wanted.  Ryan got right behind her, his body flush against hers, mimicking every curve before he pulled his sweatpants down to free his cock.  He stroked himself quickly a few times before pulling her shorts down enough that he could slip his cock between her thighs and slowly into her core to cockwarm.  Whitney let out a satisfied sigh at the feeling, and Ryan could feel her body fully relax into his.

The sigh she let out was long and cathartic, as if all the strains and stresses of the day were released with it and she was finally at peace.  “That feels so nice,” she whispered.

“We haven’t done this in a while,” he commented, combing some of her hair back with his fingers. 

“I know.  Does it feel nice for you too?”

“Of course,” he replied.

“You’re so good to me, Snook.”

Ryan kissed her temple before draping his arm over her body, queuing the next episode of SVU to start.  They lay on the couch together in that position for at least two more episodes, making light conversation or commentary on the episode every so often.  Every time she moved slightly, Whitney was reminded of how good it felt to have Ryan inside her so intimately, even if it wasn’t sexual.  While she knew it was probably going to end with them making love eventually (at least it did last time), she truly valued just being like this with him.

While Benson and Stabler were trying to solve a case, Whitney could feel Ryan begin to slip his hand under her (his) shirt.  His hand eventually cupped one of her breasts, taking his time to knead it softly before he began to pinch her nipple.  Ryan could feel her chest rise and fall, little sighs escaping her.  Then, he began to kiss the exposed skin between her neck and shoulders, and there were more little sighs coming out of her that he could feel made his cock harden.  Eventually, neither were preoccupied with the crime Benson and Stabler were trying to solve; they were only preoccupied with each other.

“Snook?”

“Sweetness?”

“Make love to me, Snook.  Nice and slow.”

Ryan peppered her exposed skin with more kisses before he began to move his hips so he could pump his cock in and out of her in their spooning position.  He took it nice and slow, just like she wanted, because her sighs were driving him absolutely insane.  To him, they were worthy of the finest orchestras in the world.  “S’at good, baby?”

“Yeah, Ry.  It’s so good.”

“You need it like this?” he asked.  Whitney nodded her head.  “Tell me why.”

“Because I’m at work all day and all I can think about is wanting to be with you,” she said.  “And when it’s like this it’s so nice because it’s so…soft.”

Ryan couldn’t help but smile, kissing her again, making sure he didn’t get too far ahead of himself and go any faster than she wanted.  She felt incredible as always, and he was going to take advantage of being inside of her for as long as possible.  “Reminds me of the first time it happened on a couch,” Ryan whispered in her ear.  “Remember?  My parents were at a show here, Shannon was at a sleepover, and we were doing our best to watch that movie we can’t even remember.”

Whitney smiled.  “I remember.  I ended up on your lap within the first ten minutes.”

“That’s right,” Ryan chuckled.  “Couldn’t keep your hands off me.”

“If my memory serves me right, I’d say it was the other way around,” Whitney said.  “You were the one unzipping my shorts.”

“Those itty bitty jean shorts you used to wear?  Can you blame me?  Your ass looked great in those.  Come to think of it, they barely covered it.”

“That was the first time I let you fuck me without a condom, too,” Whitney mentioned.  “Remember?”

He did.  They’d been having sex and Ryan was using a condom religiously, and Whitney said the only way they could have sex without one was if they both got tested for STIs.  That’s what her parents taught her if she was going to become sexually active, and she was sticking to it.  Ryan didn’t put up a fuss about it at all.  He went to his doctor, got the required test, and showed Whitney.  Whitney did the same, even though Ryan knew she was fine since she had only ever had sex with him.  “Of course,” Ryan breathed out.  “How could I forget?”

Ryan continued to move in and out of her, his hand moving down her body and to her clit where he began to rub lazy circles, causing Whitney to squirm and let out some more sighs.  Though they were taking it nice and slow, Whitney could feel her orgasm building just as slowly, her body feeling hot after so much time of being engulfed in one another’s bodies.  She put her hand over Ryan’s, still rubbing circles on her clit.  “You take care of me in every way, Snook.  I hope you know that.”

She was met by silence from Ryan.  And in that silence, her mind began to wander.  Why wasn’t he answering?  Why hadn’t he said anything in return?  All he did was continue his movements to make her feel good, which was always nice, but…why didn’t he say anything?  Does he not believe it?  “I’m close, Ry.”

“Yeah?” he finally responded.

“Yeah.  I can’t wait to feel you come inside me.”

Eventually, when Ryan felt her entire body shiver, he knew her orgasm was running through her.  Only then did he allow himself to come too, letting all his pent-up energy release inside of her.  He made sure to continue rubbing her clit to make her orgasm last longer, until he felt her hand that was over his squeeze it to get him to stop.  “Goooddd, Snook,” she sighed out.  “That was so good.  So nice.”

“I know,” he nodded.  His cock slipped out of her but was immediately replaced with his hand, feeling her wetness on his fingers before Whitney switched positions so she was facing him instead of having her back towards him.  He brought his hand up and sucked on his fingers, tasting her like he wanted.  She kissed him immediately after.  “You’re so sweet,” his voice was barely above a whisper, considering they were so close physically.

“Will you kiss me, Snook?”

Their lips met and they continued kissing for so, so long, completely lost in each other as the hum of the TV played in the background, Benson and Stabler starting to solve yet another case.

***

Whitney looked at herself in the mirror of her ensuite bathroom, wearing another one of Ryan’s Leafs shirts – this time in white – her jersey with his name on it draped over the door.  She was wearing a pair of black lace underwear that made her ass look extra cheeky.  Her nipples were already poking through the material of the shirt, but she knew she could do better.  She looked towards the shower and thought, well, that’ll be pretty hot.  She wet the t-shirt with the shower head, so much that it clung to her body, showing every curve.  She went back in front of the mirror and began to pose, taking pictures of herself for Ryan.

She was going to tease him within an inch of his life.  Why?  Because she wanted to.  Because she was still thinking about how he didn’t respond to her when they were having sex on the couch and she said, “You take care of me in every way, Snook.  I hope you know that.”  All she could think about for the past few days was how he didn’t respond.  Did he not think that he took care of her?  Did he not want to?  Did he not want to anymore?  When Ryan said he’d always take care of her, did that mean marriage?  Did that mean children?  Did that mean a life together?  He didn’t answer, so maybe it didn’t.  Maybe it did.  She didn’t know anymore.  It was all so confusing.  What she did know was this: she was going to take care of him and his ego tonight, that was for sure.  Maybe it wasn’t the right thing to do, and maybe she should approach it in a different way; maybe it wasn’t mature and maybe it wouldn’t do anything in the grand scheme of things, but God damn it, this was how she was going to do it. 

Ryan had already left for the arena for the game against the Panthers, and she would be making her way down in about an hour.  She would be meeting Bee and Aryne before the game for some dinner and was mostly ready, except for the fact that she was taking pictures of herself as if she were competing in a wet t-shirt contest.  When she was done with the wet t-shirt contest, she tossed it in the shower and put on his jersey instead.  It was oversized, but she still knew she could make it look sexy.  She made sure her underwear was visible as she made her ass was front and centre since not much else could be seen.

When Whitney was actually ready – in her clothes she had planned to wear to the game, and not the clothes she had planned to tease Ryan in – she texted Bee that she was leaving her place and on her way to Chotto Matte, the Japanese-Peruvian restaurant that the boys had apparently been frequenting as of late.  When Bee realized that Whitney’s office was only a few blocks away from hers, she resolved that they get together more often, starting with dinner before the game with Aryne and Aberdeen.  Whitney and Bee were the same age, only three days apart – Whitney born August 28th and Bee born on August 31st – and so Bee made a conscious effort to be friends with her, and Whitney appreciated the effort because she liked Bee (and all the other women) since the day she met them.

Before she lost the WiFi service at the station, Whitney took out her phone from her purse and opened the conversation she was keeping with Ryan.

Just on my way to dinner with Bee, Aryne, and Aberdeen.  Can I show you my outfit?  I don’t know if it’s too fancy.  Have you been to Chotto Matte before?

He responded right away, letting her know that he wasn’t doing anything important.  At least not yet. 

Of course.  And no, I haven’t been.

The subway rolled into the station.  Whitney chose the first of the photos she favourited from the array she took, the least risqué of the night.  A photo of her just posing in his t-shirt, her nipples poking through the fabric, a hint of the black lace of her panties showing.  She got on the subway and took a seat, and as the subway began moving towards Rosedale station, her phone buzzed. 

Looks like you’ll be cold.  I think it needs a jacket.

She chuckled.  So he was going to be a cheeky bastard.  Fine.

By the time she made her way to Bay and Front Street, Bee and Aryne were waiting in the vestibule of the restaurant.  Within five minutes Aberdeen arrived and they were seated at their table, ordering drinks and food – Whitney ordered the black cod aji miso on the behest of Aryne.  The girls chatted up Whitney like they were old friends, and not like they’d just met merely a month ago.  Whitney ignored the incoming texts from Ryan throughout dinner and had fun with her newfound friends.

Let me see your real outfit

What are you wearing?

Are you at the restaurant already?  Are the girls there?

Go to the bathroom and show me how sexy you look in your outfit

Whit come on

I’m desperate here

You can’t just send a pic like that and then go silent

He was right.  It was so incredibly rude of her to go silent after she sent him such a picture.  So, as the waiter took their dinner plates away, she quickly got on her phone and sent him a second picture.  It was a picture of her in the same outfit except this time, she had her hand down the front of the black lace panties.  She locked her screen quickly, not giving it a second thought.  Within seconds, a reply flashed on her screen.

What the fuck, sweetness

The girls paid the bill and made their way to the arena on foot, taking the elevator to the family lounge where a few of the other girls were already hanging out.  When she had a moment to herself, she took out her phone and sent another picture, unsolicited: one where she was looking over her shoulder, pulling the t-shirt forward so her ass was in full view of the mirror.

Whitney

After some small talk with a few of the other women present, another: one where her t-shirt was wet and clung to her body, especially her breasts.

WHITNEY

After the Canadian and American national anthems were played, another one: a close up of her biting her lip, her nipples poking through the wet fabric of the shirt.

There’s a lot of guys in here with me

You gotta stop

As the first period went on, another: the wet t-shirt with her hand down her panties again.

Whit I mean it

Right after the buzzer at the end of the period, another: one of her in his jersey, ass in full view.

Holy fuck

She giggled slightly.  At the end of intermission, when she knew all the men he was with would be back, another: her seated on the floor, her legs spread wide, his jersey barely covering up the visual. 

I should come down to the family lounge and fuck you senseless in the bathroom.

Patience is a virtue, Snook

Stop teasing sweetness

That’s going to get you in trouble

If I’m trouble, then maybe you should roll up your sleeves, bend me over you knee, and spank me

Ryan never responded.  Whitney didn’t push it.  She knew she had him exactly where she wanted him and left it at that.  She enjoyed the rest of the game, the rest of the banter and conversation with the girls.  She finished her glass of wine and cheered on during overtime, though the Leafs lost.

When Ryan emerged from the locker room, he barely made eye contact with Whitney.  He greeted all the other women very politely and made conversation with them as they asked him about his finger and what life was like in the press box.  He milked the conversations for as long as he could, until a couple more of the guys emerged, until he finally looked at Whitney.  “D’you want a ride home?”

“That’d be nice.  Thanks,” she smiled.

She and Ryan got into the elevator to take them down to the parking garage.  He hadn’t said a word to her.  She couldn’t help the smile that was making its way onto her face after each passing silent moment.  “How’d you like the game?” she asked.  Silence.  She bit her tongue to keep herself from laughing.  Ryan didn’t even look at her.  “You look great in that suit, by the way.  Very sexy,” she offered.

Only then did Ryan give her a look, and even then – the look sent a shiver down her spine.  She was wholly unprepared for it, and after the shiver came the heat.  She knew she was in for it.  She was anxious and excited all at once.  When they walked off the elevator and started towards his Range Rover, his strides were so long and determined that Whitney almost felt like skipping to stay on pace with him.

Once they got to his car, Whitney decided to strike again.  “Are you mad at me or something?”

They were lucky a lot of cars were parked, because Ryan pulled her in between them and pushed her up against his, pinning her between the car and his body.  “You think you can just send me pictures like that and not have me go crazy?” he muttered, his lips so close to hers she could feel his breath on her skin.

“No, I knew exactly what I was doing,” she said in a hushed tone. 

“You’re a little tease, sweetness.”

“Did you have to go beat one off in the bathroom because you got a little too excited?”

“Oh no no nooo,” he cooed before giving her a hard kiss that took her breath away.  “I’m saving everything for when we get home.”

Whitney smiled from ear to ear.  “Then what are we waiting for?”

“Oh good, their car is still here!” they both her Morgan’s voice yell through the parking garage.  Ryan and Whitney separated at lightning speed.  “You just couldn’t see them because you’re short, bumblebee.”

Whitney and Ryan both emerged from in between the cars casually.  Bee was still a bit far from them, but close enough to not have to yell.  “I just wanted to remind you to text me for dates next week when you’re available for lunch,” she said.

“Of course!” Whitney was chipper.  “I’ll look at my schedule tomorrow at work.” 

Bee nodded as she watched Ryan open the passenger side door for Whitney.  “Drive safe,” she waved.

“You too!” Whitney said before getting in.  Ryan waved to Bee and Morgan before walking around the car and getting into the driver’s seat.

***

“I was not supposed to see that.  I was not supposed to see that.  I was not supposed to see that,” Bee repeated to herself over and over as she sat in the passenger seat, eyes wide but staring at nothing, waiting for Morgan to get into the car.  “I was not supposed to see that.  I was not supposed to see that.  I was not supposed to—”

“What weren’t you supposed to see?” Morgan’s voice suddenly interrupted her.

It was as if he had just magically appeared in the driver’s seat.  Bee didn’t even hear him get in.  She was too preoccupied with the scene replaying over and over in her mind: seeing Ryan and Whitney kissing in between cars when they thought no-one was watching.  And it wasn’t just some innocent kiss, either.  There was meaning behind it.  History behind it.

“Nothing,” Bee shook her head.  “Drop it.”

“Bumblebee—”

“Nothing.”

***

Ryan and Whitney rushed inside, their bodies ready to go before they even touched either other.  Ryan pinned her against the wall and kissed her forcefully, greedily, because she let him and because he could and because he’d been waiting hours to show her what he really thought of those pictures.  His knee was between her legs.  “Y’looked so fuckin’ hot in those pictures, sweetness,” he mumbled against her lips.

“Which ones were your favourites?  Wet t-shirt or jersey?”

He huffed.  “How could I choose?” he asked, and he meant it.  He picked her up in one swift movement and carried her up the stairs to their bedroom, setting her back down on her feet.  He grabbed handfuls of her ass with his hands, causing her to make a little noise at how his fingers dug into her skin.

“You wanted to fuck me so bad after seeing them, didn’t you?” she asked.

Ryan didn’t answer.  Instead, he pinned her up against the wall again, except this time, he wasn’t kissing her.  He was looking directly into her eyes as his chest rose and fell with the intensity of his breaths.  “Don’t think I forgot about your teasing that easily,” he warned, his voice low.  He could see the fire in Whitney’s eyes at her tone.  He stopped pinning her against the wall, but she didn’t move.  “You’re in a lot of fucking trouble, sweetness.”

Whitney watched as Ryan backed up further, until he was sitting in his dress shirt and suit pants on the edge of the bed, legs spread so she could see his growing bulge.  “D’you want me to s—”

“You do what I tell you to do,” his said sternly as he unbuttoned the cuffs on his shirt.  “Understood?”

Whitney nodded excitedly, biting her bottom lip.  “Yes.”

“Are you wearing the panties in the pictures?”

“Yes.”

He paused for a moment, licking his lips.  “Show me.  Nice and slow.”

Whitney knew what that meant.  She giggled slightly before she began to untuck the rest of her shirt – whatever Ryan didn’t get to downstairs – from the jeans she was wearing.  She watched as Ryan began to cuff the sleeves of his shirt up to his elbows, and she swore she could have come right then and there.  She took off her top to reveal a lacy black bra, one that pushed her boobs up perfectly.  “You like what you see, Snook?”

“Take off your pants, sweetness.”

She unbuttoned them slowly, swaying her hips, before unzipping them.  Before she pulled them down, she took the few steps over to Ryan, just as he was finishing cuffing his other sleeve.  She turned around so her ass was facing him and arched her back so it was in his face, pulling down her jeans slowly to reveal the lacy underwear that drove him crazy.  She kicked her jeans off to the side and before she knew it, Ryan had pulled her on to his lap, wrapping a strong arm around her body so she couldn’t move.  “You think you’re cute sending me those pictures even after I told you there were other people around, huh,” he whispered into her ear, his free hand snaking down to her panties.

“I had a lot of favourites,” she couldn’t help but smile as she felt his hand cup her pussy.

“You’re so fucking bad, sweetness.”

She felt his hand push her panties aside, two fingers teasing her pussy already.  She writhed in his lap, closing her eyes.  “I meant what I said in the text, Snook,” she said.

Ryan paused, as did his fingers.  Using the name Snook said it all.  “Are you sure, Whit?”

She nodded her head.  “Yes.  Please.”

He kissed her shoulder tenderly.  Then he asked a question.  “Do bad girls get what they want?  Or are they going to have to beg?”

It was practically automatic, the way Whitney’s body heat up at what Ryan said.  She closed her eyes again.  “Please Ry, bend me over your knee.”

His arm’s grip on her loosened and he helped move her into the position she wanted to be in, over his lap with her ass exposed and ready.  His fingers went right back to her pussy, teasing her lips only momentarily before he shoved them in.  She let out a gasp at the intrusion, her body tensing in his lap.  “Ry—”

“You’re so fucking needy and desperate sweetness.”

“I am.”

“For what?  Tell me.”

She could feel his fingers curl inside of her, hitting a place that he didn’t normally hit and giving her a feeling she’d never felt before.  For a moment, she almost forgot what all this was for.  “I—I—”

“For what?”

“For you to spank me,” she finally let out.  “For you to make me feel good.”

“What about my fingers, huh?” he asked, curling them in her again, causing her to squirm in his lap and moan loudly.  “They aren’t good enough for you?”

“I want—I want more.”

“More what?”

Whitney was getting more turned on by the second.  She loved putting her pleasure completely in Ryan’s hands, because he was the only one who knew exactly what to do to her, who knew exactly what to say to get her riled up.  Besides, he put his pleasure completely in her hands, too.  “I want more—more—”

“More?  You think you’ve been a good girl who can get what she wants?”

“No,” she shook her head.  “I’ve been bad and I need to be spanked.”

Ryan looked at her ass in full view for him, his fingers leaving her pussy.  He hesitated for a moment, because he wanted to give her what she wanted, but he also didn’t want to hurt her.  They hadn’t done this before, in all the times they’d been together.  Toronto must have really been something special if this is what they were getting up to now that they lived together in the same city.  He brought the fingers that were in her pussy up to his mouth to taste her before he resolved to go for it.  He took one last glance at the excited anticipation on her face before bringing his hand up, then down.  Smack!

Whitney let out a yelp, writhing in his lap.  “Oh fuck,” she breathed out.

“Did that hurt?”

“No no no, it felt so good,” she assured him.  “Do it again, baby.  Please.”

Smack!

Another yelp, her knees coming together as she crossed her ankles.  He wasn’t spanking her particularly hard, but they’d never done this before.  “Fuck!” she screamed out in pleasure. 

“Feels good?”

“Feels so fucking good Ry, oh my God,” she couldn’t believe it.  “Keep going.”

Smack!

Ryan caught sight of her pussy again, wet and slick from before and from what he was doing.  He spanked her again and could practically see it throb in pleasure.  He brought his hand back to her pussy, sticking his fingers in with ease since she was so wet, and she cried out at the sensation.  This time, though, he quickened his pace and curled his fingers more often.  Whitney had stopped being quiet a long time ago, but as he did so, she really wasn’t quiet.  It was only after he’d had his fingers back in her for a while that he even realized she was trying to say something.

“B…b…”

“What is it, sweetness?  You need a break?”

“Both.”

He was confused for only a second before understanding what she meant.  “Look at me,” he grabbed her jaw with his free hand, which wouldn’t be so free after this if she meant what he thought she meant.  He forced her to look at him.  Her cheeks were so flushed red.  “You want both?” he asked.

She nodded.  “I want both, Ry.”

His Adam’s apple bobbed in his throat as he released her jaw.  “You gotta tell me if it’s too much, okay?”

“It won’t be.  I want it so bad Ry.  I’m gonna come so hard.  I want—I want it so bad.”

Ryan could never say no to her.  The only mode he knew was to indulge Whitney, and that was exactly what he was going to do.  He took a lick of his fingers before sticking them back in her pussy, using his other hand to give her another smack that made her cry out in pleasure.  Her body couldn’t help the movements it was making from the pleasure he was giving her, and Whitney couldn’t control them, either.  Every spank and every curl of his fingers brought her closer to a place where she and Ryan had never been before – an entirely new plane of pleasure they were capable of giving only each other.  “Mmmmm, ohmygod, Ry,” Whitney breathed out before cursing for the umpteenth time.  A new curl of his fingers hit the same spot from earlier, and she was desperate to feel it again.  “Right there, Ry.  Just like that.”

Another curl right on the spot.  Another cry.  Another smack.  Another curl.  Whitney felt like she was losing her breath, repeating his name over and over with every curl and ever smack.  She gripped the comforter for dear life, right before Ryan smacked her and curled his fingers at the same time, sending her entire body through an earth-shattering orgasm.  She’d never felt anything like it before, and she was as loud as can be.  She heard Ryan swear before the rhythm of his fingers changed slightly, slowing down before adopting a new rhythm.  The orgasm lasted longer than so many others, and when most of it finally passed, her hips lowered back down to his lap.

“Sweetness—”

It felt weird.  She couldn’t make it out at first – it was supposed to be Ryan’s dress pants, of course – but they felt different.  Had she really sweat that much?  Had he?  The feeling was different than what she was used to.  “Ry—”

“Holy fucking shit, Whit,” Ryan breathed out.

“Your pants—why do they feel wet?”

“Whit, I think you squirted.”

Whitney’s jaw dropped as she screamed in shock.  Ryan began to giggle, almost nervously and definitely uncontrollably, not believing what had just happened.  He could see Whitney’s eyes, nervous and uncontrollably delirious as his, smiling on their own above her hands that had cupped her dropped jaw and mouth.  “Are you serious Ry?”

He giggled some more.  “Oh my God-d-d-d,” he shook his head.

“I can’t believe I did that,” Whitney shook her head.  She wiggled off his lap and onto the bed as they continued giggling in disbelief.  She looked onto his lap to see the stain on his pants.  “Oh my God.  I didn’t even know I could do that.”

“I wasn’t expec—that was so fucking hot, sweetness.”

Whitney lay down on her side on the bed, shaking her head and covering her face with her hands.  “I’m so embarrassed.”

“What?!  Why?” Ryan demanded, moving so he could hover over her.  He tried to get her hands out of her face, but she kept shaking her head.  “Whit, there’s no way you should be embarrassed.  That was so fucking hot.  Are you kidding me?  I’m gonna be fucking dreaming of that for the rest of my damn life.”

Her chest was still heaving up and down as Ryan finally got her hands out of her face.   “You see what you do to me?” she asked.  “Only you can do that to my body, Ry.  Nobody else.  And you know what’s even better?”

So she wasn’t done.  Ryan bit his bottom lip.  “What’s that?”

“Only you get to do that to my body,” she said.  “You know why?”

“Because you’re all mine,” he huffed, his voice possessive as he stood up at the foot of the bed, facing Whitney as she lay there.  The visual of him towering over her, still with his dress shirt sleeves rolled up and suit pants on almost made Whitney come again.  “All fuckin’ mine.”

“That’s riiiiight,” she cooed.

“You ready to do what I tell you?” he asked, playing with his sleeves near his elbows.

“Yes Ry.”

“Spread your legs for me,” he said.  Whitney did as she was told.  Ryan licked his lips as he untucked his shirt.  “Look at that pretty pussy.  Fuck.  You’re so beautiful, sweetness.  So perfect.”

“You’re not so bad either,” she smiled.

“Touch yourself for me,” he ordered, beginning to unbutton his shirt.  Slow enough to tease her, but fast enough because he couldn’t wait, his hard cock straining his pants.

He watched as Whitney did as she was told, one hand going to her pussy while the other cupped her breast, pinching her nipple.  “I don’t want your hands anymore, Ry.  I want you inside me.  I want you to fill me with your cum.”

“Don’t worry, baby,” he undid his belt.  Whitney almost mewled at the sight of him doing it topless.  “I’ll give you want you want.  What you need.”

“I need it so bad, Ry.  So so so bad.”

Ryan eventually got into bed and grabbed Whitney’s legs, pushing them straight up and grabbing her ankles to rest them on his shoulders.  “I fuckin’ love you Whit.”

“I love you too, Snook.  Ever since we were kids.”

“Ever since we were kids,” he repeated, nodding and kissing her inner ankle.  “You ready to take my cock?”

“Yes, God yes.”

Ryan used his hand to position himself and he slid into her so easily, her pussy still wet from their previous activities.  Like always, she felt like heaven, her pussy hot and completely taking his cock.  “S’at feel good?”

Whitney nodded her head.  “Fuck me, baby.  Take care of me.”

Ryan grabbed her ankles, developing a strong rhythm and thrusting deep inside her as he made her cry out in pleasure.  His own grunts fuelled Whitney too, who couldn’t help but reach out to Ryan’s body, just so she could feel it.  He squeezed her ankles, ensuring they were secure on his shoulders.  “You keep them there.  Got it?”

“Yes.”

He leaned forward, his body and her legs getting hooked against her body.  “Oh fuck,” Whitney breathed out.  “Oh God Ry, it’s so fucking deep like this.”

“Gimme your hands.”

Even before she could free them, he grabbed them and pinned them above her head, holding them down with pressure so she couldn’t move them.  His thrusts became even harder, his movements rough but passionate.  She wanted a good fucking and she was going to get it – Ryan always made sure of that.  Whatever her need was, he could fulfil it.  Only him.  “Jeeeeesus Ry, fu—fuck me good, baby.  I need it so bad.”

Ryan didn’t know how he managed to last as long as he did.  Between the little strip show and the fingering and the spanking and the squirting, to now as his cock was buried deep in her pussy as they looked into each other’s eyes and whispered dirty talk to each other, his body was sweaty and practically as wet as his dress pants by the time he felt his orgasm build inside of him.  Whitney hadn’t been silent since he entered her, her voice becoming strained for how long he’d been fucking her and how long she’d been moaning and mewling and crying out and telling Ryan how good he was fucking her and how much she liked it. 

“Baby—baby I’m so close,” Whitney whispered.  “I want it harder.  Go deeper.”  Ryan pushed the final bit towards her body, hooking their bodies even closer together.  She closed her eyes to enjoy the pleasure.  “That’s it, Ry, that’s it.”

“Look at me,” he demanded, and she opened her eyes on the command.  “You love it when I fuck you like this?”

Whitney nodded.  “Always.”

“Tell me how much you love me fucking you.”

“Ever since the first time,” she assured him.  “The first time you touched me, Ry – I knew nobody else could make me feel like you do.  You were made to take care of me.”

“That’s fuckin’ right,” his voice was gravelly.

“Cum inside me, Ry.  Fill me up.  Fill me up,” Whitney begged.  “I know you want to.  And I want it so bad.”

“You want it bad, huh?”

“I need it, Ry.”

Within seconds, Whitney could feel his hot cum explode inside her, filling her up just how she wanted, another intense orgasm flowing through her entire body, from the hairs on her head down to her toes.  Her entire body shook and flushed red.  Ryan was moaning out loudly as he spilled every single drop he had into her, eventually stopping his movements in and out of her.  He loosened his push on her body so she could unhook her legs, and positioned her ankles back on his shoulders.  “Atta girl,” he gave a light smack to where her thighs met her ass.

Whitney couldn’t help but smirk and giggle.  Ryan let go of her ankles before collapsing on to her body and moving so they were laying on their sides, entangled with another.  Whitney was still catching her breath when Ryan slipped out of her.  “That was so good, Snook,” she whispered.

“God Whit, I love you so fucking much,” he kissed her.

“I love you too, Snook.  I always have.”

They didn’t say much else besides other sweet murmurs to each other, and as Ryan ran his hands through Whitney’s hair, she lulled into a deep sleep, thinking about how good Ryan was to her.  As Ryan drifted off to sleep, he kept thinking about how there was no place he’d rather be.

***

Hockey Night in Canada was a tradition in many households, and growing up, Whitney’s was one of them.  She remembered it being on virtually every Saturday night, Owen and Gareth glued to the TV to watch the Leafs and whoever they were facing.  Oftentimes the O’Reillys and Napiers would get together at each other’s houses on Saturday night, order some pizza, and make some popcorn for all the kids while they watched.  Whitney remembers always sitting in between Ryan and Gareth, and eventually Shannon, with the O’Reilly foster kids all around them starting Go Leafs Go chants.

Tonight, she was in attendance for a Hockey Night in Canada for Ryan, who was playing on the Toronto Maple Leafs.  She couldn’t believe it.

Whitney wore Ryan’s jersey and stood beside Bee, who held Axton up against the glass beside Jace, being held by Aryne on her hip.  John came around to fist bump, the biggest smile on his face as he saw his boys.  Jake McCabe came around too, waving at his kids who were excited to see their dad on the ice.  Jeska Schenn even got a picture of her boys posing with Luke, who gave them a puck from the ice.  Whitney could only hope that this would be her someday soon, bringing hers and Ryan’s children down to the glass to see their dad.

As this was the Leafs’ last home game, there was extra energy in the building.  When the women got back to their section and settled into their seats, they could feel it.  Mitch opened the scoring, and John scored about five minutes later, with a secondary assist from Ryan.  Aryne and Whitney hugged, jumping in unison.  In the second period, when William Nylander scored with another assist from Ryan, Whitney screamed even louder, Aberdeen screaming with her as they hugged too.  In the third period, on John’s second goal, Ryan got his third assist, and Whitney was elated.  The boys played so well, earning a 7-1 win against the Montreal Canadiens in their last home game of the season.  With the team saluting the raucous crowd, the girls clapped and cheered.

“Come to SoHo House with us,” Aberdeen whispered to Whitney as the girls began filing out of the family lounge.

“SoHo House?  Isn’t that members only?”

“Between myself and Bee, we can all get in as guests,” Aberdeen winked.  “And we need to celebrate, don’t we?”

Whitney smiled.  “Of course we do.”

Before Whitney, Aberdeen, and the rest of the girls were able to travel towards the locker room, they were stopped by a familiar voice – at least to Whitney.  “Whitney?  Is that you?”

Whitney turned her head to see a familiar face – Rachael, the girlfriend of Joel Edmundson, who played with Ryan on the Blues when they won the Stanley Cup.  She and Rachael weren’t exactly friends, but they tried to be friendly, though Rachael always had an iciness to her that Whitney couldn’t crack.  She didn’t know if it was just her personality or if Rachael didn’t like her.  In any case, Whitney completely forgot Joel was on the Montreal Canadiens, so it was very unexpected to see her at Scotiabank Arena.  Considering her personality, Whitney was slightly shocked Rachael was even getting her attention to say hi.  “Oh, Rachael!  Hey!” she greeted, smiling.  “You go ahead, I’ll catch up with you,” she said quickly to Aberdeen before re-routing herself towards Rachael.  “It’s nice to see you, Rachael.”

“Nice to see you too,” she said, though she didn’t outstretch her arms for a hug.

“It’s good that you were able to make the game here.  Your sister is studying here, right?” Whitney asked.

“Can’t believe you remember that,” Rachael commented.  “But yeah.  A couple of the girls and I came for the game, but I’m staying to spend some time with my sister.  What are you doing here?”

Whitney thought it was obvious.  She was wearing Ryan’s jersey, after all, which gave it away.  She pointed to the ‘90’ patch on her arm, giggling slightly.  “Ryan got traded here at the trade deadline, and I’m here, you know, supporting him.”

“No, Whitney…I mean, what are you doing here?” Rachael asked again.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“I can’t believe you’re still waiting around for him,” Rachael said.

Whitney froze slightly, her eyebrows furrowing at the comment.  “What?”

Rachael rolled her eyes playfully.  “Listen, all I’m saying is…you’re hot, Whitney.  And if it were you, I’d be flirting with Auston Matthews or something, not waiting for Ryan like you always have been.”

“I’ve never been waiting for Ryan—”

“—Yes you have.  We’ve all seen it.  Every time you came to visit St. Louis, Joel and I would always see it, always talk about it.  And I just can’t believe it’s still going on,” Rachael lamented, not bothering to cover the contemptuous pity in her voice.  “I feel bad for you.  If I was waiting this long, I’d want someone to tell me how desperate I looked.  You should have taken that opportunity with Binner when you had the chance.”

Whitney could feel her cheeks flush red.  “How could you even say that?  Binner was so inappropriate with me.  There’s no way I would have even considered it – then or now.”

Rachael wasn’t letting up.  Clearly, she started this conversation with a purpose.  Were these things she wanted to tell Whitney back then and only had the opportunity to do so now, when they were alone, because Whitney trusted this conversation to be a fucking normal one?  “You have to move on and accept the fact that Ryan isn’t going to want you,” she said, her words as cold as ice.  “Move on, Whit.  He’s never going to be with you.”

Whitney narrowed her eyes at Rachael.  It took everything within her not to cry or scream in her face.  Whitney knew there were some…well, characters among the partners of NHL players, but Rachael was playing a dirty game that Whitney didn’t like, that Whitney never considered playing herself.  “Is this why you got my attention?  To tell me how desperate I am?  To make me feel awful?”

“I’m trying to save you a lot of heartache.  Trust me,” she said.  “Auston Matthews is right there.”

Whitney looked directly into her eyes.  “Go fuck yourself, Rachael.”

Whitney turned on the balls of her heels and walked away, disappearing quickly behind a door Rachael wasn’t allowed access through.  Instead of going directly to where Aberdeen and the rest of the women were, she escaped into the washroom, if only to make sure that the tears welling in her eyes and the redness in her cheeks wouldn’t be visible when she saw them all again.

Rachael’s words ruminated in Whitney’s mind and made her stomach bubble as looked at herself in the mirror.  “Stop waiting for Ryan.  I feel bad for you.  Move on.  He’s never going to be with you.”  She wasn’t right.  Whitney knew Ryan loved her, yet for some reason, he didn’t want to be with her.  Ryan adored her, but couldn’t be with her.  Ryan was her forever, and she was Ryan’s forever, but something was stopping him from putting a label on that forever.  She’d cheated on her boyfriends with him.  She broke guys’ hearts because of him, so desperate to be with her that they would have walked barefoot on lava.  But Ryan was her beginning, end, and everything in between, and she wasn’t interested in men willing to walk on lava when she had Ryan willing to do anything for her.

Except be with her.

Except call her his girlfriend.

Except make her his wife.

She burst out of the washroom, walking down the flight of stairs to see Aberdeen and an array of the other girls waiting for the boys.  “All good?” Aberdeen asked.

“Mhm,” she nodded quickly, burying her feelings within her.  “I’m ready to drink.”

***

Ryan noticed something off about Whitney the moment they got into the car.  Something was off.  She assured him that everything was fine, that she’d just heard a fan say something stupid about him in the stands and it had made her angry, but he knew she was lying.  Stuff like that never bothered Whitney before, so why was it bothering her now?  The drive to SoHo House wasn’t long, but he tried to get the truth out of her with no success.  He resolved to get to the bottom of it by the end of the night, even if he had to pry it out of her.

Whitney immediately approached the bar, ordering a margarita and finishing it within the first ten minutes.  SoHo House wasn’t that kind of scene, of course, but Whitney didn’t care – if she was going to have to drink her feelings away, she would.  Upon ordering her second, she felt Ryan behind her.  “Will you tell me what happened, please?”

“I said it’s nothing,” she said. 

“Then slow down,” he said, watching as the bartender handed her the second margarita.  “I wish you would just be honest with me.”

He’s never going to be with you.  “I am being honest,” she said.  “Please, Snook.  I just want to have a fun night out with the girls.  You’re gone all next week and I’m going to miss you.  I don’t want to start thinking about it now.”

Ryan digressed, because he always did.  He knew how much Whitney missed him when he was gone – he got to see it now when he came home to her.  When they were separated for months, it was even worse.  So he let her be with the girls and he hung out with the guys, and he noticed her get a third margarita, except this time it was after a while and a few glasses of water.  He kept his eye on her, her animated face lighting up at the stories she’d tell or listen to, her laugh loud and rambunctious.

“There’s nothing going on between you two, right?” William Nylander asked as he watched Aberdeen interact with Whitney. 

“Nah.  Why?”

William knew Ryan was lying.  William knew Ryan was lying because William had something to hide once too, and Ryan wasn’t nearly as good or meticulous as he was in hiding it.  Besides, Aberdeen had said she didn’t think Ryan and Whitney were just friends, and William trusted her judgement.  “You’ve been eyeing her all night.  Just want to make sure you look around the room a bit.”

Ryan couldn’t help but chuckle.  “I’m good, Will.  Seems like she and Aberdeen get along great though.”

“Aberdeen loves her.  She’s wondering why it’s taking you so long to make Whitney your girlfriend.”

***

It was about 1:30 in the morning when everybody decided to leave.  Ryan only had one drink at the beginning of the night and water the rest of the time through, so he was good to drive.  When they arrived home, they walked in without a word to each other.  Both ended up in the kitchen, with Whitney getting glasses and pouring them some ice-cold water to have. 

“I wish you would be honest with me about what was bothering you tonight,” he said, still wanting to address the situation.  He knew it probably wasn’t the wisest thing to do, but he needed the truth from Whitney.

He doesn’t want you.  I feel bad for you.  “I could say the same,” she whispered before taking another sip of water.

It may have been a whisper, but Ryan definitely heard.  “When have I not been honest with you?”

Move on, Whitney.  “You tell me.”

“Whitney,” his voice was serious.  “What the hell are you talking about?  I’ve always been honest with you.  Now will you tell me what’s bothering you?”

Whitney finished her glass of water, wishing it was some sort of hard liquor that would give her liquid confidence.  “Rachael was at the game tonight.”

“Who’s Rachael?”

“You remember Joel’s girlfriend?”

“…Okay,” Ryan said.  “Did you guys see each other?  Did she say something?”

Whitney paused.  It was now or never.  She knew that every thought she ever had about this would come rushing out of her after she started talking, so she tried to compose herself ahead of time.  She didn’t want things to get messy.  “She said she couldn’t believe I was still waiting for you like I’ve always been,” she began.  “She said she felt bad for me, that I should have taken the opportunity to be with Binner when I had the chance.  She told me to move on because you’re never going to be with me.”

Ryan was silent.  The words hung between them as silence filled the air.  ‘”So do you?” Whitney asked out of the blue.  “Do you want to be with me?”

“You—you don’t want to be with me, Whit.”

Whitney couldn’t believe what she was hearing.  “Excuse me?  I cheated on my boyfriends with you, Snook.  And you think that?  You actually say that out loud?”

“Listen, Whit— I’d do anything for you.  You know that.”

“No you wouldn’t.  Stop lying to me,” her voice was getting angrier each passing second.  This was the moment.  This was it. 

“I’m not lying to you—”

“You won’t marry me.  You won’t even call me your girlfriend.  We’ve been doing this song and dance for ten years and you still won’t even call me your girlfriend.”

The words hung in the air again.  Ryan’s heart was almost beating out of his chest.  “You’re right, Whit.  I won’t marry you.”

Whitney could feel her cheeks flushing red.  She’d been rejected plenty of times before – but not by Ryan.  And, of course, never for something so big.  The way he said it made it sound so definitive.  “Why won’t you be with me, Snook?” her voice quivered.

“Sweetness…”

“What is it?  What did I do wrong?”

“Nothing!  Whit—Whit—my god—” Ryan’s voice was frantic.  “Why would you think you did anything wrong?”

“How could I not?” she demanded back.  “Is it because you don’t love me?”

“No!  I love you more than anyone else.  I’ve always loved you Whit.  You know that.  How—how could you say that?”

Whitney began shaking her head.  She didn’t understand why he was saying such things to her.  He wasn’t making any sense.  He loved her, but he couldn’t be with her.  She didn’t do anything wrong, but he didn’t want to be with her.  It was cutting deep; every word that came out of his mouth carving deeper and deeper into her.  She bolted from the kitchen and ran upstairs, Ryan following behind her calling her name.  “What’s wrong with me?  What’s wrong with me that you won’t be with me?” she demanded of him once they were in their bedroom.

“Nothing is wrong with you.  Not a thing.  You’re perfect.”

“Then why!!!” she began to cry.  “Then why, Snook?  We tell each other all the time how much we love each other.  We tell each other all the time that we’re the only ones for each other.  I mean it when I say it, Snook.  Do you?  I want to marry you.  I want to be your wife.  I want to have a family with you, Ry – only you.  I’m not having a family if it’s not with you.  Don’t you want that too?  With me?  Why don’t—why don’t you want that too?”

“I do.”

“You’re not making any sense!” she yelled, trying to wipe away her tears with the back of her hand.  “Why don’t you love me?”

“I love you more than anybody else Whit.  That’s—that’s why I can’t.”

“Why don’t you love me?” she asked again.  She wanted an honest answer out of him.

Ryan’s face was flushed now, too.  “I can’t marry you because of me, sweetness.  It has nothing to with you.  It never has and it never will.”

Whitney paused.  Was he seriously giving her the “it’s not you; it’s me” excuse during the most significant and momentous argument they’d ever had?  “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“I’d ruin your life, Whit.”

Okay, now he truly wasn’t making any sense.  Nothing coming out of his mouth made sense.  “How could you possibly ruin my life when you are my life?” she asked.

Those words hit Ryan hard.  Hard.  Because he knew how true they were.  And for as long as their lives have been intertwined, she had been his life too.  “Whit…” his voice began trembling too now.  “Whit, you don’t understand.  I can’t—I can’t—”

“Ryan, you’re being—”

“—No, Whit, let me—”

“—You’re being irrational—”

“—No I’m not.  It’s not—I’ve thought about this.”

“No you haven’t.”

“Yes I have.  I can’t be with you.  I can’t marry you.”

“Yes you can.”

“No I can’t.  I—I—” he stuttered, not even bring able to bring himself to say the words out loud.  “I’ll hurt you.  Like I did before.”

There was silence between the two as the words hung in the air.  “What?” Whitney’s voice was much calmer than before.  “When did you ever hurt me?”

Ryan looked away.  He bit his lip, chest heaving up and down at how emotional he was getting.  He couldn’t even bear to think about it, let alone say it out loud.  The memories still paralyzed him.  They brought back so much hurt, so much pain.  “The accident, Whit,” he whispered.

“What accident?”

“Tim Horton’s.”

More silence.  The gears were trying to shift in Whitney’s mind, but they were stuck.  “You didn’t hurt me, Snook.”

Ryan finally looked at her again.  “How could you say that?  Of course I did,” he said through gritted teeth, the pain of remembering overcoming him.  “You called me that night to pick you up and I was supposed to keep you safe.  I gave you a concussion, Whitney.  I—you weren’t the same for months, and it was because of me.  I did that to you.”

Whitney began shaking her head, watching him as he sat down on the edge of the bed with his head in his hands.  “Snook, no—”

“I don’t know how I even live with myself after hurting you.”

“Snook, no.  Listen to me—” she got down on her knees in front of him, trying to cradle his face in her hands, but he nodded them away.  He wasn’t deserving of it.  He believed he wasn’t deserving of such affection. He wasn’t worthy. 

“And I promised him,” Ryan whispered, tears falling down his face and evident even in his voice now.  “I promised Gareth I’d take care of you.  And I didn’t.  I did that to you.  I couldn’t—I didn’t—I—”

“—Snook—”

“—He was dead in the casket, Whit, and I p—I promised him—”

“—Snook please—”

“—I didn’t keep my promise, and what if—what if I hurt you again?  What if—”

“—You won’t—”

“—I love you more than anyone, Whit.  If I hurt you?  I can’t hurt you, and if we—there’s too much risk.  Because of me and how stupid I was.  I could hurt you again and—”

“—You won’t, you won’t, you won’t,” Whitney repeated desperately, hoping it would get through to him somehow.  “Snook, that’s in the past.  It’s okay.”

Ryan shook his head.  “It’s always with me that I did that to you.”

“C’mere,” she urged, and without another word she hugged tightly, his head in the crook of her neck as he cried.  She felt his tears on her skin there as she tried to calm him down by running her fingers through his hair or rubbing his back, but there was no use.  This was something that Ryan had been carrying deep, deep within him for years now, and she had no clue.  The revelation of it being the reason keeping them apart was enlightening, painful, and heartbreaking all at once.  “Let’s pretend it never happened, Ry.”

“I’ve tried.  I can’t.  Every time I try to erase the memory, I get lost in it.  All I can picture is you passed out beside me in the truck, or you in the hospital bed crying.  I hate myself for doing that to you.  I never got over it. I hate—I hate mys—”

“Shhhhh,” she cooed.  “Snook, there’s nobody else for me out there but you.”

“I know.  And I feel the same.  But I don’t deserve you after what I did.  I can’t take care of you.”

“Yes you do,” Whitney said.  “And yes you can.  You’re the only man in this world that can take care of me.”

“No.  No.  No,” he shook his head vigorously.  “I can’t take care of you if I hurt you.”

“Yes you can Snook, please,” she urged, tearing up again.  “Don’t do this to me.  Don’t make me live a life without you.  I can’t live a life without you, Snook.” 

They cried together.  It was the only thing they could do after the catharsis, after the truth had been revealed for both of them.  Ryan pulled her up and into his lap.  Whitney could feel Ryan gripping onto her, his cries still coming.  “I don’t want to live a life without you,” Ryan mumbled, “but I don’t know how I can live a life where I can take care of you how I want to…how I’m supposed to.  Up to my standards.  I promised Gareth.  I didn’t—I didn’t live up to it early on.  What if I never can?”

“I’m telling you that you can.  I’m telling you that you’re the only one,” Whitney said.  “You bought us this house, Snook.  This house is for us, right?”

“Yes.  For you, but for us.  I know it is.”

“Think about the memories we already have here.  And think about the memories we can make here,” she whispered, finally cradling his face in her hands as she stared directly into his eyes.  “The smell of your chicken soup.  The feel of your body against mine in our bed.  Think about it, Snook.  Think about our kids sliding across these hardwood floors.  Movie nights where we’re all cuddled on the sofa together under blankets.  Carting the kids around to hockey practice.  Bringing them up to Bluewater Beach to swim like we did when we were kids.  I want that with you, Snook.  D’you want that with me?”

His breath hitched in his throat at the thought of children – their children, with all their personality quirks and mops of hair and sandy toes from the beach.  “I want that more than anything.”

She made sure to kiss him quickly – a peck so small it almost didn’t register as a kiss.  “Then what’s stopping us?  Why can’t we do it?  Because you don’t feel like you can take care of me even though you have since I was seventeen?  You’ve taken care of me, Snook.  All this time.  You’ve taken care of my body.  You’re the only one that’s taken care of my body.   And more importantly, you’ve taken care of my mind, my soul.”

“I’ve taken care of you because I love you,” he whispered.

“Have I taken care of you?” Whitney asked.

Ryan nodded his head immediately.  “You always have.  Just by being you.  By being there for me.  By being my sweetness.”

“Then let’s do it.  You and me.  Because we love each other.  Because we’ve loved each other since we were kids.  Because we take care of each other.  Right?”

“Right.”

“If I take care of you, will you take care of me?”

Whitney waited.  She waited and she waited and she waited, looking into Ryan’s big blue eyes for a response.  The same blue eyes she fell in love with as a kid.  The same blue eyes that brought her so much comfort and love.  The same blue eyes she could find her own soul in.

Finally, he spoke.  “Yes.”

Whitney had waited a long time to hear those words.  She wanted to make sure she wasn’t hearing things.  She needed to confirm.  “Yes?”

He nodded.  “Yes.”

More confirmation was needed.  “We’ll get married, Snook?”

“That’s all I’ve ever wanted.  I’ve just been scared, sweetness.  We’ll get married,” he confirmed.  “I’ll give you everything.  I’ll take care of you.  I love, you Whit.”

She kissed him again, much more passionately this time.  “I love you, Snook,” she said against his lips.  “I can’t wait to be your wife.  We’re going to spend the rest of our lives taking care of each other, right?”

“Yes.  Yes,” he affirmed, kissing her again. 

Ryan held her tight onto his body as he moved back on to the bed.  They continued to kiss for a long time, long enough that Whitney’s lips got red and puffy, with Ryan whispering “I love you, I love you so much” over and over again like he was reciting a prayer.  To have Ryan be hers was all Whitney ever wanted, and she couldn’t believe they had finally gotten to this point.  After ten years and countless secrets, grief and elation and success, Ryan was able to overcome his fear.  Whitney was able to help him.  They would be able to live their lives now as they always wanted to; no longer in secret.  They could hold hands in front of their parents.  They could give each other quick kisses on the backyard deck.  They could wrap their arms around each other in front of friends.  Nobody would have to second-guess or question their love for one another.  They could just be how they were with each other in front of other people.  Whitney anticipated it to be the most liberating feeling in the world, to be able to proclaim that she loved Ryan O’Reilly, and Ryan O’Reilly loved her, and that they were going to build a life together.  A life they wanted.  A life they deserved together.

“Make love to me Snook,” she whispered in his hear as her hand played with the hair at the nape of his neck.

Ryan took his time, kissing along her jawline before moving down to her neck and clavicle, covering every inch of her skin with his kisses.  He helped her get out of her shirt and bra before she helped tug his own shirt off.  Whitney quickly leaned back so Ryan could take her pants and underwear off – same with him – before she got back into his lap, wrapping an arm around his shoulders so they were physically close.

“I love you, Snook.”

“I love you too, sweetness.”

“You need to know you’ve never hurt me before in my life,” she stressed.  “Not even the accident.  Never, okay Snook?”

Ryan nodded his head.  “Let me kiss you.”

Their lips crashed together again, their tongues stuck down each other’s throats.  Whitney made sure to run her fingers through his hair, because she knew he liked that.  Ryan made sure to drag his hands down to her hips, squeezing at the flesh there and making her grind into his lap before moving his hands onto her ass.  “You need to know something too,” he said, his voice low.

“What’s that?”

“It’s always been you, Whit.  Since we were kids.  I’ll take care of you until the day I die.”

Those were words Whitney had wanted to hear for a long time, considering he was saying them now in the context of her being his wife.  She felt so elated and so happy that it was almost as if the ten years of waiting was worth it.  “Make love to me, Snook.  Like you love to do.”

One of his hands snuck between their bodies so he could position his hard cock at her entrance.  He took the opportunity to tease her only for a few seconds before pushing it in.  Whitney grinded her hips in his lap, getting him all the way inside her.  She paused, her mouth open against Ryan’s.  She didn’t care how many times it happened; every time he was inside of her, Whitney swore she saw stars.  “You’re so big, Snook.  So perfect for me.”

“Love you so fucking much, Whit,” he whispered in her ear.  His hands moved back to her hips, helping guide them as she moved in his lap.

“God you feel so good,” she whispered, leaning back slightly and exposing more of her neck and decolletage to Ryan.  He took the opportunity to kiss her everywhere, leaving some love bits on the way as he licked and sucked at her skin.  Eventually, he made his way down to her breasts, taking a nipple in his mouth and swirling his tongue around it, causing her to sigh in pleasure.  Her nails were digging into his back; she was holding on to him for dear life.  “Keep doing that, Snook.”

He kept up with his kissing and love bites between her breasts, eventually moving to the other and taking the other nipple in his mouth too.  Whitney continued her movements in his lap, and he could tell that she was trying to make this last.  Good.  If it were up to him, it would last all night.  He’d test the limits of what was physically possible.  “You’re so beautiful, Whit.  I could kiss every inch of you.”

“You’re lucky you have,” she couldn’t help but smile.  “And you’re going to get to the rest of your life.”

They looked deep into each other’s eyes then, the heat of their bodies radiating between them.  “I can’t wait for you to be the mother of my children.”

Whitney smiled widely this time, unable to contain it.  “I can’t wait, either.”

“Don’t think I didn’t ever want that with you.  I did.  I always did.  I was just scared—”

“—It’s okay, Snook,” she put her index finger on his lips.  “You don’t have to be scared of hurting me anymore.”

He kissed her, unable to say anything else.  Whitney began running her hands through his hair.  They kissed again for a while, until both could feel their orgasms building.  “I love you, Snook.  Will you come inside me?”

Ryan nodded quickly.  “Always,” he said.  “I’m the only one.”

“That’s right.  You’re the only one that gets to come inside me.”

After some more kissing, both Ryan and Whitney felt their orgasms rush through their bodies at the same time.  Whitney held him close, gripping on to Ryan for dear life, their heads on each other’s shoulders as they cried out in ecstasy.  They let it last as long as possible, riding it out for as much as they could before their breath started to come back to them and they sunk into each other’s arms. 

Whitney was the first to pull back slightly, only to have her lips meet with Ryan’s again in a series of small, slow, lazy pecks.  She could rest her lips on him all night if she could.  “I love you so much.”

“I love you too.”

“Will you hold me in your arms as we sleep?”

Ryan couldn’t help but smile.  “You never have to ask me that.  I’ll always hold you.”

They shifted positions, Ryan pulling the covers off the bed and Whitney getting under them.  She snuggled into his body as he draped the covers over them, and he wrapped his arms around her when he was done, making sure she was comfortable.  “Hey Whit?”

“Yeah Snook?”

“I’m sorry you were waiting for me.”

Whitney couldn’t help but smile slightly to herself.  There was no reason for him to feel guilty.  It took a while, yes, but this was their story.  And it would always be their story now.  “Don’t apologize,” she said.  “I have you.  That’s all I need.”

[sweettomyhoney]

PLEASE STOP WRITING

• Smut/NSFW where they are your step brother (that is still incest )

• Smut where you are having a 3 way with two brothers ( that is Incest and you need deep healing!!!!)

• Writing shit that only applies to skinny white bitches with blonde hair

• Best friend’s brother / brother’s best friend ( we are tried of seeing the shit!!)

Y’all promoting and flirting with your incest kink is weird very weird!!!

[leafs-lover]

Too Far Gone - The Contract

A/N: Can't write part 55 to save my life 😭 but we have another unedited bonus chapter, giving you a little glimpse into their life in the future. If you're not reading the fic, don't worry this is a stand alone piece.

Warnings: Smut (p in v, creampie), dirty talk, swearing, mentions of drinking, not really edited

Series masterlist

Word Count: 3100

Tia tried not to give too much thought to Auston’s contract, the media and fans were doing enough of that.

She had enough going on in her life. Maddie had started to sleep through the night then she started teething. Taylour was wild and energetic, always busy with Felix, wanting to see Brody from down the street or Carter from his class, and still impartial to Maddie. He might have stopped asking “when is she leaving’ but he has shown no interest in his sibling, sometimes becoming frustrated when his parents are busy changing her diaper and need a minute before giving him attention.

Tia has read books, spent hours online reading blogs and stories from other moms in similar situations, trying everything to get them to bond without forcing it, and it’s just not working. She always saw herself with a big family, but more importantly a loving family, how can they be one when Taylour is generally disinterested in her? 

And if it’s not the kids, or Felix’s limp that sporadically appears for a few hours, it’s her line. She used TikTok to advertise and sales erupted. She found herself with a massive list of pending orders, stores in Montreal, Toronto, Brooklyn, and Scottsdale were reaching out to stock her pieces. Made with Grace expanded from a spare room with a sewing machine, to a studio space with a business manager, marketing manager and two additional seamstresses, but even then she doesn’t feel like she can keep up.

So, when Tia told people she didn’t really have time to stress over his contract, she wasn’t lying. It’s not to say they hadn’t talked about their future; they just hadn’t sat down and fully weighed out the options.

She told Auston she would follow him anywhere, that they’d be happy so long as they were together, and she meant every single word but Toronto is a part of her, a part of them, and it would break her to leave it all behind. It’s where both of their children were born, where Taylour learned to walk and talk, where Maddie will learn all those things, where they found each other but more importantly themselves.

Tia wanted Auston to be as objective as possible with his decision, but she knew she had to tell him of her preference.

“And right here.” Judd points to the line at the bottom of the page and Auston once again scribbles his signature. He then flips the final page over, then smiles.

“That’s it?”

“That’s it.” Judd nods. “You are going to be a Maple Leaf for four more years.”

Auston did give some thought to free agency. There are a few teams that have the cap space to meet his needs, and those that don’t would likely move some parts to make it work. He had options, lots of options, but none of them would send him down York Street after practice, right past her studio. And if he didn’t drive past then studio then he couldn’t stop in and raid her snack drawer, lie about needing a button fixed just to sneak in a kiss or two, or just watch his wife hard at work. He wouldn’t be able to take Maddie and Felix on walks through the park where he first felt Tia come back to him, nor could he drive past his old condo where they finally said what they had been holding onto for so long. They couldn’t go to dinner at Beck’s and Camille’s condo, which is actually Tia’s old condo, and see the exact spot where he first held Taylour.

Toronto is home. That was the only reason he needed.

 “Tia and the family must be excited.”

“They will be.” Auston smiles wide and grabs at the beak of his hat to adjust it. “I decided to keep this from them, thought it’d be a nice surprise.”

“It will be.” The two men move toward the door where Judd slips into his shoes. “Don’t celebrate too much,” he winks, then steps outside, leaving Auston alone.

He quickly whips his phone from his pocket and opens twitter. Without so much as a second thought he types up a tweet, his first tweet since March. The second he posts the tweet; he is sharing it on his Instagram then heads for the sliding door.

The Arizona heat blasts his face the second the door opens. Felix’s nails on the concrete are heard as he eagerly scurries over from the pool, leaving wet pawprints all over the patio. Auston crouches down and scratches him behind the ears and chuckles when his warm tongue presses to his cheek.

“I know, I’m excited too.” Auston grins, scratching the pups head. “Should we go tell them?” Felix’s tail wags faster and he lets out an excited yip. “Yeah? Let’s go.”

“Hey T.” Auston starts as he sits on the edge of the pool and dangles his feet in the water, Felix plops down beside him for more pets.

“Hey, how was your meeting?” Tia wades through the waist deep water with Maddie on her hip and makes her way to the edge. When Maddie sees Auston her tiny fists open and close, and some incoherent babbles come from her lips. “Is that Daddy?” Tia bounces her a few times before handing Maddie over to him.

“Hi princess.” Auston hooks his arms under her armpits, then brings her in close, peppering her with kisses, hoping to hear one of those giggles she had been letting out as of late. “Meeting was good.” Auston blows a raspberry to her stomach, laughing when her legs kick out.

“Daddy, watch!” Taylour stands at the edge of the pool with his toes hanging over. His arms go up above his head, and he jumps into the air and dives into the water. When he pops his head up a few seconds later, he spits out some water and smiles.

“Wow, you’re getting good at that.” Auston replies, adjusting the brim of Maddie’s bucket hat to fold up and be out of her eyes.

“You weren’t even watching; you were paying attention to Maddie.” Taylour protests.

“I can do both Taylour.” Auston informs him. “But why don’t you show me another one?”

“Fine.” Taylour rolls his eyes and starts swimming to the edge of the pool.

“Hopefully you gave Maddie less sass than him,” Auston jokes. This time he cradles Maddie in close and locks his gaze on Taylour as he positions himself at the pools edge to dive again.

“It’s not funny.” Tia mutters while clapping for Taylour when he pokes his head up after another dive.

“Your dives are great Taylour, arms are really straight.” Auston encourage him.

“Mhm.” He proudly smiles while treading water. “You want to play basketball?”

“Give me five minutes and I’ll get my bathing suit on.”

“Okay.” He swims over to the shallow end to retrieve the basketball, that catches Felix’s attention and he jumps in the pool, splashing the three of them, and starts to swim over to Taylour.

“His reaction is perfectly normal, he is adjusting, just at his own speed. You see Instagram?”

“When would I have seen Instagram?” Tia laughs.

Auston unlocks his phone and hands it to her, forcing her focus away from Taylour. Her forehead creases and lips purse as she scrolls through the posts, wondering what exactly she is supposed to be looking for. “Yeah, Mommy is silly, isn’t she?” Auston uses his baby voice to ask Maddie when she coos in his arms. Unable to wait any longer, he takes the phone back and clicks on his story.

She closes his story, then opens the Toronto Maple Leafs page and sees nothing. She searches Wasserman hockey, but again there is nothing, along with Sportsnet, TSN and ESPN. She keeps opening pages, trying to find confirmation of his somewhat cryptic post. Fed up, Auston snatches his phone back which brings her gaze to him.

“You re-signed?” She asks, in disbelief.

“Yeah.”

Butterflies swarm her stomach. “Four years?” 

“Yeah.”

“And you broke the story before anyone else?”

“I was excited.” Auston shrugs, letting his smile grow even wider.

Tia puts her hand on either side of his thighs and pushes herself up. Beads of water roll over her breasts - larger than normal from breastfeeding - down over her stomach and baby weight she can’t seem to shake no matter how hard she tries. Once at eye level with him, Tia presses her lips to his, joyful tears clinging to the corners of her lashes. With Maddie in one hand, Auston brings his other to her hair, wet from the afternoon in the pool, and welcomes the kiss. It’s soft at first but slowly builds to more, his fingers tighten in her hair and her tongue move about his mouth. He can feel the relief wash over her body.

“I’m so happy.” She whispers, choking back tears. “I really wanted to stay.”

“I know.” Of course, he knew. “But you should have told me.”

“Everyone had opinions, I wanted you to make the best decision for your career.”

Auston runs his thumb along her jaw. “You’re the only opinion that matters to me.” 

**

Tia dressed herself in a flowy maroon dress with thick straps. It stopped right at her knee and had a slit that went a few inches up her thigh. She pulled her hair into a simple but stunning bun and managed to apply a little bit of make-up before Maddie woke up from her nap. She fed and changed her, then put Maddie in the newly released mauve coloured polka dot dress with ruffled sleeves along with the matching headband.

She wasn’t overly dressed up (that wasn’t an easy task with unexpected dinner plans and a five-month-old) but the second Auston saw his girls his breath was taken away. He kissed her, almost a little too hard and long, but pulled away then helped load the kids in the car.

They met his family at Modern Oyster Bar & Chophouse. Auston reserved part of the restaurant which provided privacy for their celebration. Tia and Auston kept their phones on silent and tucked away - everybody who knew them was texting to congratulate them, and they just wanted to enjoy the night. And tucked under his arm with cheeks sore from smiling, Tia was doing just that. 

“We’re staying in Toronto?” Taylour probes.

While he begs Tia to take him to every game (even road ones), plays hockey, will show Auston YouTube clips and basically lives and breathes the sport, trades and free agency is all very new to him. He doesn’t understand why Uncle Mike isn’t going to be in Toronto anymore, why he has pictures of Daddy and Uncle Freddie both wearing Leafs jerseys, yet Fred plays for another team, and he certainly doesn’t grasp that there was the potential for them to leave Toronto.

“You sure are.” Brian tells him, gently bouncing Maddie on his thigh, smiling as drool rolls down her chin.

“Maybe without that stress you two can plan your wedding.” Ema beams over her glass of wine.

Auston feels Tia’s body stiffen ever so slightly, but he just laughs. Since the day Auston told his mom he was going to propose Ema has been asking about wedding plans. Once Tia had said yes, she became relentless, never missing an opportunity to ask when the date will be. She understood why they didn’t plan it for last summer given the uncertainty COVID brought and kind of let up once they announced their pregnancy with Maddie, but on more than one occasion Ema brought up how there was months between Tia’s due date and the summer. When Tia and Auston told her they just wanted to enjoy this time as a family without the added stress of planning a wedding, she understood, then tried to get them to lock down a date in 2024.

“Yeah. Maybe.” Auston shrugs.

“Have you even looked at venues?” Brey asks, not in a curious way but a condescending and annoyed way.

She always has been skeptical of their “engagement.” Given her brother declared he was going to marry Tia after one date, FaceTimed with the family at least a dozen times while out shopping for rings because it had to be just right, blew up the family group chat making sure everyone knew not to say anything and to act normal so she wouldn’t suspect anything, then spent the entire day pacing and on the phone ensuring every single detail was perfect, she expected a very short engagement. So, when they reply “we’re not in a rush” anytime someone asks, accidentally call each other husband or wife only to backpedal and say something along the lines of ‘we live together and have kids, were basically married’ it didn’t make sense, and Brey is determined to get the truth out of them.

Auston drops his lips to Tia’s ear and whispers, “should we just tell them?”

Tia cranes her head and squeezes his hand under the table. “No.”

He gently kisses her. “You sure? Make this a lot easier?”

“Make what easier?” Brey cocks her head and narrows her gaze.

Tia and Auston smile at each other as she mindlessly spins the black metal ring on his index finger. The ring she put there over two years ago when they did get married less than 24 hours after getting engaged, because neither one of them wanted to wait. But because all their friends and family couldn’t be there, they kept it a secret. That’s why Tia doesn’t wear her wedding band outside the house (except when she forgets to take it off) and why Auston wears his wedding band is on the index finger and not the ring finger.

Auston turns to Brey with heat flaring behind his cheeks and playfully smirks. “Nothing.”

**

The kids went to his parents and Auston and Tia ubered home. One glass of wine lead to two, which lead to three, and that was where Tia stopped. Her tolerance had dropped since having Maddie and anymore would have made her a mess and Tia didn’t want to be a mess tonight (unless the mess was made from Auston’s cum).

It didn’t take long for them to get to bed, and it was even less time until his head was buried between her legs, greedily bringing orgasm after orgasm to her. When she finally made him stop because her legs were trembling and vision was turning white, Tia found herself on her knees, attempting to return the favour, but Auston didn’t let her finish. At the last second, he roughly grabbed her hair and brought her in for an incredibly sloppy kiss.

“Lie down.” Auston instructs her, nipping at her lower lip.

“No.” Tia breathes out before roughly pressing her lips to his.

“T -”

“I said no.” Tia repeats, then yelps when Auston spanks her.

“I signed the contract; I should get to decide how we celebrate.” His voice is thick and gravelly, as he tries to maintain control. 

“I gave birth to your children so if I say I’m not getting on my back…”Tia pushes away from him and sits on her heels. “I’m not getting on my back.” 

Auston shifts on the mattress, his shoulders cracking in the process. This dominant behaviour from his wife is new and relatively uncommon, but fuck does it ever turn him on.

In one quick motion Tia spins and puts her back to him with her knees on either side of his hips. Using her hand, she strokes his throbbing cock over her entrance, coating it in her slick. He grabs at her ass cheeks, the only thing he can, and they both moan when she fills herself with his length.

“Shit baby.” Auston chuckles. Tia starts to move, up and down on his cock, getting faster and faster while her ass bounces along with her.  “You feel so good.”

“You always fuck me so good.” Tia cries when Auston moves his hips.

“Isn’t that what a good husband should do?” He spanks her again then grunts as her pussy tightens around his cock. “Properly fuck their wife?” He thrusts upward, wincing as she claws at his thighs for support.

“Yes.” Tia whines. Auston slaps her ass one more time for good measure then grabs at her hips. He has no intentions of trying to control the pace, she is doing that just fine on her own, he just wants to touch her. He always wants to touch her.

“So, I’m just doing my job Mrs. Matthews.”

Tia’s walls pulsate around him. She loves when he calls her that almost as much as he loves saying it. She wishes they could announce it to the world, then she could legally change her name to match him and their children, even Felix has his last name. Most of the people in their lives would be so happy they wouldn’t even care about missing one of the biggest moments of their lives. Not Ema. She of course would be happy, but she would be disappointed to have been excluded and Tia she can’t live knowing she disappointed the only mother she’s ever had.

“Making sure my wife is taken care of.”

Tia flips her hair to look back at him over her shoulder and whispers in the most innocent of voices, “keep it up and I’m gonna ask you to put another baby in me.”

Auston lets out a shaky exhale, he loved watching Tia be pregnant.

He lifts his hips up, making her fall forward until she is gripping his knees for stability. “I’ll do it.” Auston smacks her ass once again, earning himself a loud, excited yelp. “You just tell me when.”

At this point, Tia didn’t know how Auston was keeping it together, she didn’t know how she was keeping it together. Every single thrust was perfectly placed, brushing up against her g-spot, nudging her closer and closer to her release. Her nails were carved into his thighs, sweat was rolling down her back, down his chest, the sounds coming from their lips were feral, animalistic, but they kept fucking.

He watches himself disappear inside her walls a few more times then grips her hips and holds her on his member, pouring his hot, sticky seed inside – just the way she likes. Her walls grasp and hug his cock, and she can’t help when her eyes see static.

It takes a few minutes for either one to move. There is a lot of panting and muttering of curse words, hands gingerly trailing over the others sticky skin. But when Tia finally finds the strength to lift herself off his now softened cock, Auston wraps his arms around her body and pins her tight to his chest.

“I love you T.” His voice is hoarse.

“I love you too, Aus.” 

Taglist: If you are in this list you have expressed interest in the series (either through likes/reblogs or by asking). If it’s crossed out your tag didn’t work. If you would like to be removed or added to the list send me an ask:

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[stereax]

whos your favorite player on every team?

Ooh, this is a fun one! Under the cut :) Also not gonna use former Devils, and gonna try to stay away from just naming the most known player on each team... we'll see.

Anaheim Ducks: Lukas Dostal is doing a damn good job tending that net. I'm super excited to see where he goes!

Arizona Coyotes: Of course, our pride king Travis Dermott!

Boston Bruins: Look. I said I was gonna not name the most known players. But you can't expect me not to name a goalie for the Bruins! Impossible! I'm gonna give the edge to Jeremy Swayman.

Buffalo Sabres: Probably Jeff Skinner, honestly. Most cursed man in hockey. Does that make me old?

Calgary Flames: I don't follow the Flames much but I do really like Cody Taylor.

Carolina Hurricanes: Pyotr Kochetkov is, in my opinion, the only Cane with rights.

Chicago Blackhawks: All Star Jason Dickinson just seems like a funny dude. Well, for having to play for Chicago...

Colorado Avalanche: I am forgiving Ross Colton for that really shitty shift against the Devils because he's holding Woody's hand and they're cute. But I'm watching you, mister.

Columbus Blue Jackets: Alexandre Texier. He's French! And played in Switzerland last year! And is suffering!

Dallas Stars: Thomas Harley is carrying half my fantasy teams and he seems like such a fun dude!

Detroit Red Wings: Jake Walman, hitting the griddy, and getting a bobblehead after it.

Edmonton Oilers: I am not immune to Ryan McLeod propaganda. Just look at his smile!

Florida Panthers: Sam Reinhart, the highest-paid Panther, has no goals and one assist in his last six games and his ice time is declining. Where are the Sabres fans who told me how much they would miss him? When I hear of all the positive qualities the team lacked in the past, I think of Reinhart - lol nah that's just the Reino copypasta. Love him!

Los Angeles Kings: Long Distance Girlfriend Kevin Fiala and his hysterical wife!

Minnesota Wild: Mats Zuccarello is very short. This is always fun. Especially because his stick is very long. Also fun.

Montreal Canadiens: Juraj Slafkovsky is not only worryingly homoerotic with every single Slav he meets, he is also trying valiantly to overcome the bust narrative, and he's silly and goofy! What more do you want?

Nashville Predators: Roman Josi. I am not immune to a good-looking Swiss man.

New Jersey Devils: All of them. I'm in a Dougie Hamilton mood right now, though. (Aka, I miss him :'( )

New York Islanders: The Real Sebastian Aho, simply because it's funny there's two of them. Also, this one is prettier.

New York Rangers: There's a fic out there that makes me somewhat like Braden Schneider.

Ottawa Senators: I'm saluting Jacob Bernard-Docker for his services to my fantasy teams.

Philadelphia Flyers: The image of Known USNTDP Member Cam York fielding calls from Zegras on how to take care of his platonic soulmate is truly peak.

Pittsburgh Penguins: The Other Smitty, Reilly Smith. I am predictable. I have a type.

San Jose Sharks: Anthony Duclair! And his many sons on the team.

Seattle Kraken: Kailer Yamamoto. I just like him because he's short, okay? He also seems to have a very fun character, which I admire.

St. Louis Blues: Colton Parayko, for no other reason than it's a very good hockey name.

Tampa Bay Lightning: Brayden Point is another of those players that just eternally carries my fantasy teams.

Toronto Maple Leafs: I think Calle Jarnkrok is eternally underrated. And I'm right.

Vancouver Canucks: Stanley Cup Champion Teddy Blueger. He deserves it.

Vegas Golden Knights: I simply believe that if one does not at least admire Jack Eichel for his dedication to being a bitch and ruining all the narratives, one does not exist to me.

Washington Capitals: They have Dylan Strome from the fics! It just takes some time, little girl you're in the middle of the ride, everything everything will be just fine, everything everything will be alright alright...

Winnipeg Jets: Nino Niederreiter. God, I hope he finds a home some day. I hope it could be Winnipeg.

[lonewolflink]

hi! before reading your fic I’d only ever watched one hockey match at my local mall (there’s an ice rink) and it shook me for real. after reading your fic my interest in hockey has resurfaced, but I have no idea where to start. any suggestions?

HELLO!!! i'm sorry this response is so damn late; it's been hectic af around here (here being...my life).

i am genuinely so excited that you're interested in getting into hockey. it is such a fun sport to be a fan of.

*warning*: this is a super long post, because i wanted to answer you thoroughly and make a list of useful resources in case anyone else reading wsc also wanted to get into watching hockey and wasn't sure where to start.

generally speaking, my recommendation is to familiarize yourself with the basic rules of the game, and then maybe pick a team to start following. being a fan is most fun once you start getting invested in the players on the team and know their stories, their connection to the community, etc.

—basic rules of the game—

there are some more (and less) useful guides online to getting into watching hockey. i'll link you a few; peruse at your leisure (and note that some of these posts are pretty old; they're still overall solid though).

(1) i think this short guide is might be the best place to start. it's just some guy on his own personal blog, i think, but that (weirdly) is what makes it a better take than more "official" sports journalism outlets.

(2) this is a really helpful (and fairly short) guide to the different zones of the ice and what they're called, and some other basic concepts of the game. i think it's directed at parents of kids who are starting to play hockey, but still super useful!

(3) this guide doesn't give a ton of detail but it's solid re: concrete basic steps to take to get into hockey.

(4) parts of this guide are outdated (e.g. brendan shanahan no longer runs the department of player safety and is instead the president of the toronto maple leafs) and it's a little pretentious in the way hockey fans can sometimes be, but it gives a sense of the flavor of being a fan of this sport i think.

(5) more on this below, but 2024 began with a bang, as the Professional Women's Hockey League (PWHL) began it's inaugural (!) season. there are some differences between the NHL and the PWHL, some of which are covered here and here. if you're interested in watching women's hockey, that'll be useful!

—picking a team and how to watch—

[note: i am assuming you live in north america. if you do not, some of this might not apply, e.g. picking a favorite team based on geographic proximity]

if you're starting at a baseline of 0 hockey knowledge, you should probably know the names of three hockey leagues: the National Hockey League (NHL, the best men's league in the world), the American Hockey League (AHL, the NHL's minor league where their young prospects usually play for a few years before transitioning to the majors), and the aforementioned Professional Women's Hockey League (PWHL, literally brand new as of a month ago).

NHL Recommendations

—the NHL is a great place to start for watching hockey, largely because it has the best players in the world so the level of play is extremely high and entertaining, and it has some really great personalities in the game right now. i watch the NHL regularly. —if you live in an area that already has an NHL team (or at least one within 2 hours of driving), i'd recommend starting out as a fan of that team. this is bc part of sports culture is to support your home/local team, but also because that gives you more opportunities to see your favorite team play in person. here's a list of all the NHL teams. —watching the NHL on TV or your computer is actually kind of annoying, because the league is run by a bunch of idiots in its bureaucracy. you can watch most games (but for some reason not all of them) if you have ESPN+. here's the nhl's official guide for how/where to watch. —i am a poor grad student so i use other...completely...legal...means to stream NHL games online. they are, as i just said, completely legal (...). but um. nonetheless, if you want to know how to find and use these means...maybe just...shoot me a private message. —if you don't have geographic proximity to any of the NHL teams, there are a few ways to pick a team to follow. some classics:

1. as you learn about hockey and watch some games, you might find yourself starting to have a favorite player. you can start with their team! [message me or send another ask if you want some recs for players to look into!]

2. pick the jersey you think is coolest. it's how kids pick their favorite teams half the time, so why not us? here's a link to an article that that ranks the current home jerseys of teams. i STRONGLY disagree with these rankings, but the photos of the jerseys are high quality so you can see them well. you can also see each team's away jersey and third/alternate jersey designs here.

3. pick a fun, up and coming team to follow. some notes on this: —for example, if i were you and could pick any team, i would probably not pick my very own favs the washington capitals. they were one of the dominant teams of the last 15 or so years because our captain is the greatest goalscorer of all time. however, he is now 38 (ancient by athlete standards) and the team is on its decline. —by contrast, a team like the edmonton oilers is super exciting to watch; they're considered current championship contenders because they have by far the best player in the world, connor mcdavid (aka "McJesus"). they're kind of a heart attack to watch because they have insane offense but not amazing defense, so they score a lot and get scored on a lot. they're a team with amazing history (wayne gretzky's dynasty oilers in the 80s), but were TERRIBLE for decades until mcdavid came around. he's trying to bring the franchise back to glory from the pathetic ashes it turned into. —then there's teams like the montreal canadiens or buffalo sabres, who have been really bad the last while but drafted a ton of great young players who are on the verge of becoming superstars. they'll probably not make the playoffs this year (and maybe not next year) but they'll be on the cusp soon and getting into a journey like that with a young team early on is super fun. —in general, teams i'd stay away from being a fan of, if you have a choice:

-washington capitals/pittsburgh penguins/st. louis blues (formerly top teams in the league, now on the decline) -toronto maple leafs (the most tortured fans (and also somehow the most annoying and entitled), don't join their ranks) -arizona coyotes/columbus blue jackets (disaster franchises (sorry fans of those teams! it's true!!) traditionally have been poorly run) -chicago blackhawks (they do have the next great superstar in connor bedard, but they've had some really messed up scandals in their organization and it leaves a bad taste in my mouth) -new york rangers/islanders (unless you're from nyc...don't)

—recs for current good teams if you want to come in when they're already hot, they're all pretty fun teams tbh: -carolina hurricanes -colorado avalanche (recent champions) -new jersey devils -florida panthers -seattle kraken -vancouver canucks -vegas golden knights (recent champions) -edmonton oilers

—recs for up and coming young teams that will break out in the next 1-4 seasons, i think: -anaheim ducks -buffalo sabres -detroit red wings -montreal canadiens (would be my pick, i low key love them) -ottawa senators

AHL Recommendations

it can be super fun to follow an AHL team if you happen to live near one. tickets to AHL games are SUPER cheap, and the arenas are smaller and more intimate. you get to see some really talented players early in their career before they become superstars, and this can also help you pick a favorite player to follow (and thereby, later, a favorite nhl team) for their career! i love going to AHL games, and did that a lot in high school.

here's the list of AHL teams.

PWHL Recommendations

tragically, i have been so busy in 2024 so far that i haven't been able to get into the PWHL yet. however, i'd really like to, once i have a bit more time.

because the league is in its infancy, there are only six teams: -boston -minnesota -montreal -new york -ottawa -toronto

they don't currently have team names outside of the cities, but i think those are coming next season. for myself, i already know i'm going to be a montreal fan (i lived there for 5 years, and montreal's hockey culture is in my opinion the best in the world).

the pwhl is great for many reasons. -first of all, women athletes. let's fucking go!!! -second of all, we get things like two fiancees playing on the same team (on the same line!!) and celebrating together when they score a goal. -third of all, women's hockey has traditionally had a different ruleset from men's hockey to discourage the more...violent aspects of the sport. but the PWHL...has been honestly violent af so far, at least from the highlights i've seen. could be that hitting is still against the rules, but seems like the refs don't really give a shit, so the games are bloodthirsty lol -fourth, and perhaps most importantly, it is super easy and convenient to watch the PWHL. they stream every (!) game on their youtube channel for free!

for more info on the season schedule and how to watch, look here.

also, speaking generally, i'll probably be reblogging some pwhl content on tumblr so you can peep some of the people i'm reblogging and poke around until you find a team or player you like! :)

OK THAT'S IT SORRY FOR THIS LONG ASS POST I JUST WANTED TO ACTUALLY DO YOUR QUESTION JUSTICE, HOPEFULLY I DID AN OKAY JOB!! PLEASE ENJOY YOUR HOCKEY JOURNEY!!!!!!!!!! <3

[eusuntgratie]

Hello, I came across the 'fighting in Ice Hockey' Wikipedia page and was very intrigued! Now several youtube compilations (Best nhl fights, then funny moments, then best goals etc) and several Hockey AUs for pairing I'm already a fan of later, I'm ready to continue my hockey journey (descent?) - do you have any blogs you can recommend? Also do you have a place to start re teams and or like essential viewing or reading? Normally I can just watch a show or read a book, but this feels a bit different and I don't know where to start 😅

Also I see the is quite a bit of RPF on Ao3- totally chill with that good writing is good writing after all, but is there any like background on why certain pairings are popular?

oh goodness, hi! and welcome to the madness that is hockey fandom/hockey rpf! i'm probably/definitely not the best person to answer this as i'm pretty new to hockey fandom and only closely follow three teams, but i'll do my best <3

okay *most* hockey blogs are focused on one or a couple of teams. so it's a little tricky to point you in a direction if you aren't already attached to anyone. you can find a lot of good hockey primers on tumblr if you search for a team or a ship + primer.

if you have a local or localish team, maybe start there? descend into tumblr tag hell. many of us start out going oh haha i'm just going to read fic, and maybe reblog some gifs, and then end up attached to teams that are far away and spend obscene money to see those teams when they travel close to us. (my favorite team is in a different conference, so they only come to my city once a year).

there are definitely teams that have more fandom activity and those that have less. all based on the narratives, baby. my local team isn't very fandom active on here, so while i generally root for them and follow them and go to games, i'm not fandom feral about them.

MY team is the pittsburgh penguins. i do not, nor have i ever, lived in pittsburgh. but the pens have the longest serving trio in professional sports, and i am completely and utterly in love with them (but not as in love with them as they are with each other). our captain, sidney crosby (fat of ass and genuinely one of the best hockey players EVER) and his two alternate captains, evgeni (geno) malkin and kris letang, are all obsessed with each other. sidgeno is definitely one of the most popular pairings in hockey rpf. i read and write a lot of them. you can browse #fave 8771 and #sidgeno on my blog to get a glimpse of why.

(note that hockey ship names are unpredictable. sometimes numbers mushed together, sometimes names mushed together, sometimes something else, sometimes there's not really a ship name).

some other big ships are travis konecny/nolan patrick of the philadelphia flyers (love these two... they don't play together anymore... theres a lot of backstory there. theres lots in #tknp on my page), auston matthews/mitch marner of the toronto maple leafs (not my jam i'm no help), alexander ovechkin/nicklas backstrom from the capitals, leon draisaitl/matthew tkachuk (more of an enemies to lovers type scenario), and jamie drysdale/trevor zegras of the anaheim ducks. these ships are popular bc they are insane about each other in some way. oof there's so many more though? these are all popular on ao3 so there's lots of fic out there; perhaps a good starting place.

let me know what you're looking for and i'm happy to point you in a direction! a team, a ship dynamic, a type of 'character' you like, a type of fic you like; we got it all. tell me what you're into and i can spin you around and give you a gentle shove towards some unhinged gifs, a lovely fic, or a nice fancam :)

dying to know which pairings you're already into and why 👀 that might also be a good starting place. (you're welcome to dm me if you'd rather do that)

hockey friends PLEASE feel free to chime in!

[theemporium]

I can very much tell you that the Toronto Maple Leafs and Montreal Canadiens are MORTAL enemies 😂 My family’s actually got a pretty even split between Leafs and Habs fans and I swear EVERYONE makes bets whenever they play each other.

— 🧚🏻‍♀️

BQWJDKBEFBKQEBWJFEJWB

oh god okay, thank you for telling me because they were about to be "civil" in this fic😭

[gothgaymoth]

i feel like tumblr would enjoy the products of the first time i took adderall, in which i decided suddenly i wanted to watch hockey and choose which team i watched based on AO3 Men’s Hockey RPF (Real Person Fic), M/M pairing statistics.

anyway

BASED UPON AO3 POPULARITY (M/M MEN'S HOCKEY RPF, NO CROSSOVERS; APPROX. 11,000 FICS) #1 Sidney Patrick Crosby OC ONS is a Canadian professional ice hockey centre and captain of the Pittsburgh Penguins of the National Hockey League #2 Jonathan Bryan Toews OM is a Canadian professional ice hockey centre and captain of the Chicago Blackhawks of the National Hockey League #3 Patrick Timothy Kane II is an American professional ice hockey right winger and alternate captain for the Chicago Blackhawks of the National Hockey League #4 Evgeni Vladimirovich Malkin is a Russian professional ice hockey centre and alternate captain for the Pittsburgh Penguins of the National Hockey League #5 Tyler Paul Seguin is a Canadian professional ice hockey centre and alternate captain for the Dallas Stars of the National Hockey League #6 Mitchell Marner is a Canadian professional ice hockey right winger and alternate captain for the Toronto Maple Leafs of the National Hockey League #7 Jamie Randolph Benn is a Canadian professional ice hockey winger and captain of the Dallas Stars of the National Hockey League #8 Auston Taylour Matthews is an American professional ice hockey center and alternate captain for the Toronto Maple Leafs of the National Hockey League #9 Alexander Mikhailovich Ovechkin is a Russian professional ice hockey left winger and captain of the Washington Capitals of the National Hockey League #10 Patrick Sharp is a Canadian former professional ice hockey player... in the National Hockey League for the Philadelphia Flyers, Chicago Blackhawks and Dallas Stars (RETIRED) #11 Marc-André Fleury is a Canadian professional ice hockey goaltender for the Minnesota Wild of the National Hockey League

BASED UPON A03 POPULARIY (M/M MEN'S HOCKEY RPF, NO CROSSOVERS) #1 Patrick Kane/Jonathan Toews (1654) #2 Sidney Crosby/Evgeni Malkin (1521) #3 Jamie Benn/Tyler Seguin (704) #4 Mitch Marner/Auston Matthews (438) #5 Nicklas Backstrom/Alexander Ovechkin (244)

STATISTICS

Teams, with Multiple Patrick Sharps

Blackhawks 3/10 Stars 3/10 Penguins 2/10 Maple Leafs 2/10 Capitals 1/10 Flyers 1/10

Teams, with Final Patrick

Blackhawks 3/10 Stars 2/10 Penguins 2/10 Leafs 2/10 Capitals 1/10

Teams, sans Patrick (Fleury added) Blackhawks 2/10 Stars 2/10 Penguins 2/10 Leafs 2/10 Capitals 1/10 Wilds 1/10

Teams, sans Patrick II, for some reason Stars 3/10 Blackhawks 2/10 Penguins 2/10 Maple Leafs 2/10 Capitals 1/10 Flyers 1/10

Nationalities Candaians 6/10, Russians 2/10, Americans 2/10

1 Canada 8857 2 United States 5395 3 Sweden 2189 4 Russia 1067

Total number of players in the top 4 NHL nationalities: 17,508

Captainality Captains: 5/10 Alt. Captains 4/10 (5 incl. Sharp, Blackhawks) Other 1/10 (Fleury)

The top 10 most popular NHL Teams (# of fans is online only) # NHL Team Number of Fans Stanley Cups 1 Chicago Blackhawks             2,735,079      6 2 Boston Bruins             2,141,162        6 3 Pittsburgh Penguins             1,981,607           5 4 Detroit Red Wings             1,937,141           11 5 Montreal Canadiens             1,638,437       24 6 New York Rangers             1,479,947           4 7 Toronto Maple Leafs             1,342,357        13 8 Philadelphia Flyers             1,142,950        2 9 Vancouver Canucks             1,002,049        0 10 L.A Kings             920,989          2 source: https://www.stadium-maps.com/facts/nhl_facebook_table.html#fbtable

CONCLUSION The most popular players to fic ratio is not correlated to the number of Stanley Cups. The correlation between general popularity and AO3 popularity seems hit or miss. The Bruins, Red Wings, Rangers, Canucks and Kings do not have any players in the top 10 on A03, despite being in the top 10 most popular. The Blackhawks are the exception- taking in to consideration multiple Patrick Sharps cannot exist at the same time- they have the most players in the top 10 on AO3 and are also the most popular team. The Penguins have two players and are the 3rd most popular. THe Maple Leafs have two players and are the 7th most popular. The Flyers are the 8th most popular and have no players, if Patrick Sharp is in his final form.

Position as a captain or alternative captain seems to give you a distinct advantage as all top ten players on AO3 were either role at some point.

Nationality may over-represent Russians in fic. There were no Swedish players in the top 10, despite there being almost twice as many Swedish players as Russian players. This is taken out of context of teams, however, and has a low sample size for popular players.

This is not statistically noted, however on further research Olympic medalists make up the top four most popular players on AO3, along with 2 other players in the top ten (3 including Fleury). Skill may be a factor in AO3 popularity.

"Sidney Crosby" is tagged in more fics than "Sidney Crosby/Evgeni Malkin" and is, as a whole, the most popular player. "Jonathan Towes" is the second most tagged player, despite "Patrick Kane/Jonathan Toews" being the most popular relationship tag. "Patrick Kane/Jonathan Toews" and "Sidney Crosby/Evgeni Malki" and their respective players seem to be the focus of Men's Hockey RPF on AO3. Both of these tags are of their respective team captain and alternative captain. All of the top five most popular relationship tags are between team captain and alternative captain. Three of the top ten most popular relationship tags are between (alt.) captains and non-captains.

i chose to watch the bruins

[kittleskittle]

listen i am ONLY posting this here for the niloy server (because we've pretty much all adopted Drakka as our dirty little desert boy) and it's not going to make much sense if you haven't read my Aloy/Nil/Drakka hockey AU fic State of Love and Trust (it's the most self indulgent thing i've ever written but it's also my best writing ever, so)

anyway here's a speedpaint of modern AU Drakka as the Toronto Maple Leafs' starting center forward. He's also the captain. Why hockey? The mullet and also he has hockey bro vibes. Why the Leafs? because he feels like a Leafs fan. That's all.

[spine-buster]

Lost in the Memory | Ryan O'Reilly | Volume IV

gif credit @/schwizzle-schwartz

A/N: Soooooooo many good things! And bad things! And emotional things! Next volume, the playoffs start 😐

“Ryan and I have something to tell you.”

Early the next morning, Whitney felt cold as she woke up in her bed.  After being spoiled by having Ryan’s arms around her all night, it wasn’t a welcome feeling to wake up without his body close to hers.  She rubbed her eyes and they opened slowly, the light from the window causing a longer adjustment period.  When she could finally see at least semi-clearly, she looked around for Ryan.  Luckily, she didn’t have to wait long.  She found him sitting on the edge of the bed, his back to her. 

She got up slowly and quietly, wiggling her way out from underneath the covers before crawling over to him.  He was so deep in thought that he didn’t even turn around, didn’t even feel the bed move under her weight.  When she touched him – her hand tracing a line up his back along his spine – his head finally moved to the side.  She wrapped her arms around his neck and shoulders.  “G’morning, Snook,” she said, her voice still sleepy.

“Morning, sweetness.”

“Did you sleep okay?”

“Yeah, of course,” he said, lying partially.  “I always do with you.”

Whitney watched as he brought his hand up to caress her arms, his fingertips trailing over the skin on her forearm as he brought it close to him and gave it a quick kiss.  In return, she kissed his bare shoulder.  He was quiet.  And if Whitney knew anything about Ryan, she knew that when he was quiet, he was thinking.  Stuck in his own head.  There were two people able to get him out of his own head: his dad, and her.  She knew she’d have to do that now.  “What are you thinking about, Snook?” she asked.

“Last night.”

“What’s wrong?  Aren’t you happy?”

“Yes,” he responded immediately, leaving no room for any doubt.  “I’m the happiest I’ve ever been, sweetness.  I’ve just…I’ve been up thinking about all the memories.  I dreamt of them all night.  Of you and me.”

“What stood out?” she asked.

“So many.  Too many,” he said, leaning back slightly into her body and looking at her over his shoulder.  “I never—I never led you on, did I?”

“No,” Whitney shook her head.  “It just took a while to get to this moment.”

“Did you ever not feel loved by me?” he asked again.

“Never.  I always knew you loved me.  And I don’t just mean when we first got together, when we first kissed when I was sixteen,” she clarified.  “I mean, I always knew you loved me.  Always.  Every time you picked me to be on your team, or gave me extra Nutella on my toast, or let me eat from your bowl when Gareth would steal my popcorn.  I knew that was love too.”

Ryan stayed silent, thinking over her words.  That helped with many of his insecurities, but not with the biggest one.  “You need—you need to do something for me.”

“Anything, Snook.”

“If we’re going to do this, you—you have to tell me if I ever hurt you.”

Whitney’s heart hurt, hearing those words come out of him after everything that was said last night.  “That’s imposs—”

“Whitney,” his voice was stern, serious.  He looked deep into her eyes.  “I mean it.  If I ever hurt you, or—or if I ever don’t take care of you, you have to be honest with me.  I made those promises to you, and you have to tell me when I break them.”

Whitney knew that deep down, all men were insecure about a multitude of things, but in the deepest part of them, there was always one thing they were the most insecure about.  This was it for Ryan.  He wanted to be perfect for her.  He wanted to hold himself to a standard he set, that only he could attain, that would be impossible for everybody else.  This was his deep insecurity because he thought he failed on it in the past.  Ryan had never failed in anything, but he thought he failed in following through on his promise to Gareth, protecting her, taking care of her.  He was never going to let that happen again. 

She nodded.  She knew it would give him piece of mind.  “I promise,” she said.  She moved her hand to cradle his face.  “Snook, I hope you know how happy you make me.”

“I do,” he nodded.  “And you make me so happy too.  Happier than anyone.  You deserve the world, Whit, and I’m gonna do my best to try to give it to you.”

She smiled, giving him a kiss on the lips.  “You know how you can start?”

“How’s that?”

“Make love to me one more time before you leave for the week.”

Ryan smiled.  He still had a while before having to get to the airport, so he knew they could get up to a lot.  “That I can do,” he whispered, giving her a quick kiss.

He turned around fully to get back into bed, but instead of going at each other immediately in a flurry of lips and tongues and kisses, they took their time.  Whitney lay back down and Ryan lay beside her, propping himself up on one arm before beginning to kiss her.  It reminded Whitney so much of how all of this started, how he’d drive them out to Lake Huron for some privacy in case someone in town saw them and they’d put the back seats down and lay like this, ignoring the sunset that they were supposed to be watching.  Ryan was just as sweet and gentle then as he was now.  His core hadn’t changed.  It was just one thing Whitney loved about him.  Hockey and the NHL and all the success that came with it didn’t change him.  He was the same kid from Varna that she grew up with, the same kid who’d give you the shirt off his back.

Come to think of it, they were in the same position in which so many of their rendezvouses happened.  Ryan trying not to overpower or intimidate her with his size, Whitney trying to pull him on top of her body because she wanted him there.  “Snook?”

“Hmm?”

“When are we gonna tell our families?” she asked in between kisses.

“When I get back,” he said.  “I don’t want you to tell them without me here.”

“Okay.”

“We’ll drive up Friday afternoon.  Maybe we’ll even spend the night in Goderich.”

Whitney nodded.  “They’ll be happy for us,” she said in between kisses.  She didn’t know if she was saying it to convince herself – she didn’t know why she was saying it at all, really.  She knew their families would be happy.  “We’ll have to Zoom Owen.”

“We will, we will,” he whispered, attaching his lips to hers again.  He didn’t let up this time; Whitney was barely able to get a breath in until his tongue left her mouth.  “Whit, can I taste you?”

She nodded her head quickly, a quick “Yes, yes” escaping her as Ryan kissing down her body before helping her out of her pajama bottoms. 

He took a pillow and placed it under her hips.  “Hey, look at me,” he whispered, looking up from between her legs.  Ryan waited a few moments after they made eye contact to speak.  “I love you,” he said, his tone strong and steadfast.

“I love you,” she replied, her tone equally as strong and steadfast as it could be when Ryan O’Reilly was between her thighs.

She watched as he kissed the skin of her inner thighs before placing his tongue on her pussy softly.  He was going to enjoy this – she knew he was.  The first time he ate her out, he was just as gentle and just as slow, mostly because she was so nervous.  He held her hand through the whole thing and was down there for so long Whitney thought it was abnormal that it was taking her so long.  Ryan had assured her that it was normal, and that there was no way he was coming back up without making her come. 

She reached her hands down and grabbed on to his hair gently, little sighs and moans escaping her as she felt him suck on her clit expertly.  He knew exactly what to do to make her feel pleasure, knew exactly what to do to make her feel like she was the luckiest girl in the world.  She felt his tongue lap at her pussy, drinking her up like a thick milkshake.  “You do that so good, Snook,” she sighed out, one of the only things she’d said this entire time.

Ryan looked up at her with his big blue eyes, his lips still on her pussy, his beard giving her the best beard burn possible.  She thought she’d be used to it after all these years, after how many times he’d been between her thighs, but she wasn’t.  It was still such a sight to behold.  She could see him smile.  She smiled back and giggled softly before tightening her grip on his hair.

Whitney adjusted the pillow under her hips slightly when she could feel her orgasm building.  “Keep doing that, Snook,” she said.  “Just like that.”

Ryan listened, because he knew what Whitney liked, but also because he knew what he was doing.  He continued to lap at her, her orgasm building within her.  Eventually, with an arch of her back, she cried out as her orgasm flooded over her.  She squeezed Ryan’s head between her thighs inadvertently, but he didn’t move, his lips and tongue staying on her as she rode out her orgasm, getting every last drop from her.  “God, Snook, every damn time,” she couldn’t help but giggle as she felt his lips leave her pussy.  His lips and beard were glistening with her juices, and she bit her bottom lip at the sight.  “Look at you, baby.”

Ryan pulled back and stood on his knees, and it was only then that Whitney was able to see how hard he’d become just by eating her out.  He pulled his boxers down, freeing his hard cock from its confines before crawling over her.  “You don’t want me to—”

“No no,” he interrupted her softly.  “I need to be inside you.”

She spread her legs for him easily, and he hooked one of them over his torso before pushing into her slowly.  He watched as she closed her eyes, taking all of him in.  When he was fully inside her, he stopped and began moving some hair away from her face gently.  “You’re so deep, Snook,” she breathed out, opening her eyes to look at him.  “It feels so good.”

“When we get married, when you become my wife, I’m gonna spoil you so much,” he said, giving her a quick peck.

“You already spoil me.  How could you spoil me more?”

“I’ll find ways,” he said as he began to move in and out of her slowly.  “You want a bigger house?”

“No.  I love this house.”

“Then I’ll get flowers delivered every week,” he said, causing her to giggle.  “Or brownies.  You love brownies.”

“I can make brownies every week,” she offered.  “But that means extra time training with your dad.”

“Or more sex to burn off all those extra calories.”

Whitney laughed out loud, unable to believe they were actually having this conversation while he was inside her.  “Tell me what else, Snook.”

“Our wedding will be perfect because you’re planning it,” he continued.  “We’ll be surrounded by our family and friends.  We’ll dance all night.”

“Sounds perfect.  We can have it on the lake.  God knows we need to see at least one sunset over Lake Huron one of these days,” she joked.

“I still won’t see it because I’ll be kissing you all night,” he said.

Whitney smiled.  “Tell me more, Snook.  I love this.”

He kissed her before continuing.  “We’re gonna have as many kids as you want.  In this house.”

The thought made Whitney’s breath hitch in her throat.  That was all she ever wanted – a life and a family with Snook.  Now she was getting it.  “Yeah?”

“When you want, when you’re ready, you’re going to take out your IUD, and we’re gonna start a family, Whit.  And when you get big and round I’m gonna go insane cause that’ll be my baby in you.  Our baby.  Ours.”

“You gonna fuck a baby into me, Snook?”

“Yes,” there was the slightest growl in his voice, the slightest hint of possessiveness in his voice.  She knew it would get him going, that wording it the way she did would set him off.  “I’ll give you as many kids as you want.  I’ll give you everything.  We’re gonna raise them here.  They’ll go to Bluewater Beach like we did.”

Whitney almost felt like crying.  They had such an idyllic, pastoral childhood, and she wanted to give that experience to her children, too.  “We’ll put them all in hockey.  We’ll clear space in the basement for all their smelly gear,” she said, making Ryan chuckle.  “We’ll all play street hockey with the neighbours, and on weekends we’ll be in Goderich looking up at all the stars.  In the winter we’ll put on our snowshoes or skates and go out on the frozen lake.  We’ll read them bedtime stories and tuck them into bed together.”

Ryan nodded his head, as if in agreement, as if that’s exactly what he was thinking about and wanted too.  Every single thing Whitney said, he could picture vividly in his mind.  “That’s right.  That’s right.”

“You and me, Snook,” she said to stop from crying. 

“You and me, Whit.”

They continued to make love until Ryan felt close, increasing his pace slightly to get himself there.  Whitney knew – she could feel it in him – and arched her back to get a better angle.  “You close, Snook?”

“Yeah,” he struggled to get out.

“Come inside me, Snook.  I want to feel you.  I want you to make me feel good.”

Ryan came inside her as he always did, her walls tightening around his cock as she went through another orgasm.  He buried his face into the crook of her neck, kissing her skin there until he felt his orgasm fade.  Whitney wrapped her arms around his shoulders before he lowered his body, settling into her side and on the bed as he slipped out of her.  “I love you, Whit.”

She was still catching her breath, but she replied easily.  “I love you too, Snook.”

“I’m gonna give you everything you want.  I’m gonna give you a home, kids.  I’m going to spoil you.  I’m going to take care of you,” he huffed out as he looked at her.

Whitney smiled, cradling his face in her hands.  “I’m going to take care of you, too.”

***

Ryan had packed for the five-and-a-half day road trip to Sunrise, Tampa, and New York City.  He had his suitcase by the door and had called a taxi to take him to the airport.  Whitney had been preparing something for him to eat on the way, even though the team probably had snacks and food waiting for them on the plane.

“Whit!  Taxi will be here in two minutes,” Ryan called out, slipping into a pair of sneakers at the front door.

Whitney emerged from the kitchen, carrying a chickpea tuna sandwich and some carrots in a bag.  She watched as he finished putting his shoes on before handing him the sandwich and carrots.  “Do you have everything you need?” she asked.

“Think so,” he said, putting the sandwich into his jacket pocket.  “I’m gonna miss you,” he said, leaning in to kiss her quickly.

Except it was never just a quick kiss with Ryan and Whitney.  One kiss turned into two turned into three turned into seven.  It was only when Ryan felt the lightest of tears rolling down Whitney’s cheeks did he pull away.  “Hey hey hey, what’s going on?” he asked quickly.

“I’m sorry—I don’t mean to,” she pulled away, too, wiping the tears away quickly with her fingers.  “It’s just a long trip.  I want you here with me is all.”

Ryan cupped her face in his big hands.  “Don’t cry, sweetness.  I won’t be able to go if you’re still crying.  They’ll have to delay the MLSE jet.”

Whitney couldn’t help but chuckle at that, putting her hand over Ryan’s just as she saw the taxi pull up on the curb.  “Go.  Go baby,” she put her hands on his chest.

“Not until you—”

“I’ll be okay, Ryan.  I just can’t wait for you to come home so we can tell everyone.”

“It’ll go by quick, I promise,” he said.  “One more kiss, sweetness.”

She leaned into him and they kissed, except this time, Ryan really didn’t let go.  He wrapped his arms around her waist and held her tight against his body, his tongue forcing its way in her mouth.  A little noise escaped her mid-kiss, and when she wrapped her arms around his shoulders, her backed her up against the wall at the entrance, a knee between her thighs, pinning her there.  His big, strong legs were a favourite of hers.  The things she imagined doing to herself on those thighs…the things she had done to herself on those thighs.  It gave her goosebumps to remember.  Their open-mouth kisses were getting hot and heavy, until—

Beeeeep beeeeep!

The taxi honked its horn inconsiderately from outside.  They stopped kissing immediately, looking out the front door panels.  “Go.  You’re going to be late.  I don’t want to be responsible for holding up the MLSE jet.”

“I’ll just blame it on traffic.”

“Go!”

He gave her one last look and (truly) one last kiss before grabbing his suitcase and opening the door.  She stood in the door frame and watched him walk out to the car, putting his suitcase in the trunk after waiving the driver’s offer for help, getting into the backseat.  He waved at her.  She waved back.  Then he was gone down the street, away for five and a half days. 

***

It was a beautiful spring day in southwestern Ontario.  The sun was out, there were only a few clouds in the sky, and although it was still a bit chilly out, it felt like people were finally awakening from their winter hibernation, ready to hit the ground running into spring and summer.  Though Whitney felt like she had new life in her ever since Ryan got to Toronto, she couldn’t help but feel an extra skip in her step at the good weather.

It was the perfect opportunity for her to take a drive. 

To Seaforth.

To St. James Catholic Cemetery.

Breathe in.  Breathe out.  Breathe in.  Breathe out.  Breathe in.  Breathe out.

The grass at the cemetery was still dull, not fully brought to life yet, but that didn’t matter.  With a bouquet of flowers in her hand, Whitney made her way to the site she knew best, the site she could walk to with her eyes closed.  As she stood at the foot of Gareth’s grave, she read the inscription as she always did when she visited.

Gareth James Napier

March 1st, 1991 – June 5th, 2013

Beloved son and friend

“Death leaves a heartache no one can heal;

Love leaves a memory no one can steal”

She kneeled, placing the flowers against the tombstone before she brought her hand to her mouth, kissed it, and touched his name engraved.  “Hi Gareth,” she whispered.  “It’s me again.”  She paused momentarily, feeling the wind run through her hair.  “I know you’ve been watching, but I want you to hear it from me.  We’re finally together.  Ryan and I.  It’s official.  We’ve loved each other for a really long time and we finally—something just clicked.  I found out Ryan thought he couldn’t keep his promise to you.  That’s what’s been keeping us apart for so long.  That’s what was holding him back all these years.  You know him.  I mean, you were best friends.  He always set high standards for himself but I think this was the highest.  Can you…Gareth – can you help him realize that he doesn’t need to be scared?  I always regret not telling you what was going on between us.  I think you would have been happy after the initial shock.  Maybe if we had, it wouldn’t have become a secret for ten years.  I’ve always been happy with him.  And now, Gareth…we’re getting married.  I’m gonna become Mrs. O’Reilly.  We’re going to start a family together.  And that’s something I’ve wanted with him all along.  I wanted you to be the first to know.  Before mom and dad and everyone else.  Because he was your best friend.  You were my best friend too…”

Whitney paused.  She tried to reign in her emotion, but there was no use.  Tears began falling from her eyes, sobs coming up in her throat.  That she had to speak to a headstone as opposed to her beloved brother was an injustice of the highest degree.  Nobody deserved this.  Breathe in.  Breathe out.  Breathe in.  Breathe out.  Breathe in.  Breathe out.  “I miss—I miss—I miss you so much.  I want you here so bad.  So bad, Gareth.  I don’t want to do this without you.  I always think to myself…why was it my brother that had to die?  Why did it have to be Gareth?  What did it have to be him?  It could have been anyone else in the world.  I know that won’t bring you back but it’s so unfair that you were taken from us so early.  You still had so much to do.  You still had so much joy to spread.  I want—I picture you at our wedding, dancing and singing like you always did, being the life of the party.  You were the brightest star in every room and I can’t deal with the fact that you’re not here for this.  I’ll be thinking about you always.  Our kids are going to know how amazing their Uncle Gareth was.  I promise.”

She took some time to compose herself, wiping her tears away with her long sleeves.  “Look over me, Gareth, like you always did.  And look over Ryan too.  I know you always do, but he’s going to need it.  I love you Gareth.  And I miss you more than words can say.  I’ve had a hole in my heart ever since you left us.  I love you.  I love you.”

Breathe in.  Breathe out.  Breathe in.  Breathe out.  Breathe in.  Breathe out.

***

Whitney didn’t know how long she sat at Gareth’s grave for.  She didn’t know how long she felt the wind blow gently through her hair.  She didn’t know how far the sun and clouds moved across the sky.  Everything was a blur, and time wasn’t real.  She didn’t know what time it was when she got up, placed one more kiss on her hand and touched Gareth’s name, and walked back to her car.  She barely even remembered getting into it, starting it, and pulling out of the parking spot to get back on to the main road.  The only reason she knew where she was going was because it was like muscle memory to her.  She’d done this route countless times before – the cemetery to her parents’ house, or the cemetery back into Toronto.  She could have done it with her eyes closed.

She practically was.

As she drove down the country roads to get to the highway, she began thinking even more than before.  Memories flooded her mind.  She kept thinking about her brother.  She kept thinking about how big his smile was and all the goofy faces he’d make to get her to laugh.  She kept thinking of how he would “let” her play Mario Kart with him if she was “good” because she wanted to fit in with him, Ryan, Cal, and Tara.  She kept thinking about the time he broke his ankle playing hockey and made her his personal slave.  She kept thinking about when she went to high school and all her teachers would say, “Whitney Napier?  Are you Gareth Napier’s little sister?  Oh my God, your brother is such a gem!”  She kept thinking about the first time she and Gareth travelled to Colorado together to watch Ryan play and Gareth was crying in the stands at seeing his best friend in the opening lineup of an NHL game.

BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP!!!!!

Whitney swerved her car to the right on pure instinct, narrowly escaping a clip collision with an oncoming pickup truck by mere milliseconds.  She screamed at the loud noise, pushing her break and skidding along the road until she came to a full stop that was so forceful her chest nearly hit the steering wheel.  The dust from the sand and rocks at the side of the road came up in the air around the front of the car.  Her chest was heaving up and down as she finally realized what had almost just happened.

She closed her eyes.

She couldn’t believe what she’d just done.  She had become so lost in her own thoughts and memories of the past that she hadn’t been paying attention to the present.  In a vehicle, no less.  It was fine if it was in the privacy of her own house, alone, in bed, at night, whatever it was – but in a vehicle?  She felt so stupid.  So…irresponsible.

She burst into tears.  Loud, ugly wails escaped her as she sobbed alone in her car.  There was nothing she could say that hadn’t already been said, and there was nothing she could say that would make the situation better.  The sadness would be with her always, the pain of not having Gareth with her, with Ryan.  While they had found ultimate happiness in each other, and would feel that happiness for the rest of their lives, Gareth’s memory would always be a part of them, too.  With it brought joy, sadness, jubilation, and hurt.  Whitney heard once that grief was just unexpressed love.  When she watched Fleabag and Fleabag said “I don’t know what to do with it.  With all the love I have.  I don’t know where to put it now”, she felt that more than anything.  It was how she felt about Gareth.

Breathe in.  Breathe out.  Breathe in.  Breathe out.  Breathe in.  Breathe out.

It was only when she stopped crying nearly an hour later, trusting herself to not get too emotional and actually make her way back home safely, did she allow herself to start her car again.  As everything turned on, the radio station played a song: “Dancing in the Moonlight” by Toploader.

Gareth’s favourite song.

***

The Toronto Maple Leafs won their last three games of the season.  Ryan had scored against Tampa, and had taken rookie Matthew Knies under his wing in his dressing room and on his line.  The Leafs were now in playoff mode.  The entire city was buzzing.  Whitney drove out to Pearson Airport to pick him up.  She waited with Bee and Aberdeen, who were bundled up in chunky knitwear and a Leafs hoodie over the top, as if they coordinated their outfits.

Bee hadn’t told anyone what she saw.  Not even Morgan.  It wasn’t her secret to tell, and she didn’t want to be that person.  She wasn’t that person.  She’d been a victim of horrible rumours before, and she wasn’t going to be the person telling everyone.  She wasn’t even sure what she saw, in that she didn’t know what it meant.  Though she could tell the kiss had a lot of feeling and history behind it, she didn’t know what that feeling was, or what that history was either.  However, she did remember back to the first time they spoke, at Whitney’s first game and afterwards at Aberdeen’s surprise birthday party, where a drunken Aberdeen told Bee that she sensed that Ryan and Whitney were definitely not just friends.  If Aberdeen could see it, could others see it too?

When the boys began to file through, Bee made sure to keep a sneaky eye on Whitney.  She greeted Morgan and gave him a kiss and a hug, looking over his shoulder to see Ryan greeting Whitney politely and civilly.  They hugged, but it was quick and nothing special.  Bee heard Whitney ask Ryan if he was tired and Ryan saying yes.

“We’ll see you guys soon, yeah?” Morgan called over his shoulder at them before taking Bee’s hand in his.

“Absolutely,” Ryan nodded.  “Drive safe, bud.”

Their walk to Bee’s Civic was quiet.  She popped the trunk so Morgan could deposit his suitcase.  After he got into the passenger seat and she started the car, Morgan looked over at her.  “I think you’re going to need to order Whitney one of those wag jackets,” he said out of the blue.

Bee whipped her head to look at him.  Her heart was in her throat.  “Why do you say that?”

Morgan sighed, as if he was burdened with the news like a Victorian duchess.  “It was an accident,” he said.  “I was standing beside him as the luggage was coming out.  He was looking at his phone.  I…caught sight of his screen.  Bunch of texts from her.  I caught the word lingerie.  Then the thumbnail of a photo of her in said lingerie.  But I didn’t see anything, I swear.”

Bee was sure she looked like an owl for how wide her eyes were.  Nope.  Not happening.  She was not going to deal with this in the middle of the night.  Not today, Satan.  Not today.  She put the car in reverse.  “Morgan Frederick Rielly, we are not going to gossip about our friends.”

She was also not going to tell Morgan she already ordered a jacket for Whitney.

***

Ryan and Whitney’s drive back home was mostly quiet.  She could tell he was tired from being on the road, and the time that the team got in didn’t help, either.  She made sure to drive as safely as possible, considering what had happened.  She hadn’t told Ryan yet, and she needed to.  God, there were a few things she needed to tell him about what she’d been up to while he was away.  It had been a long five-and-a-half days, made especially longer by her visit to Gareth. 

When they were in the privacy of the house, with everything locked and alarms set, they made their way to their bedroom.  Whitney stood in front of her floor-length mirror to take off her earrings, and she watched through the reflection as Ryan came up behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist, pulling her close to his body and settling his face in the crook of her neck.  She couldn’t help but smile at the warmth of his body.  He left a trail of kisses on her skin before looking at her through the reflection.  “I missed you,” he whispered.

“I missed you too, Snook.”

“What did you get up to when I was gone?”

“Looked for wedding venues.”

He smiled from ear to ear, chucking lowly and giving her skin another kiss.  “That’s my girl.”

She winced slightly, but Ryan couldn’t tell, because he couldn’t see it yet.  A little souvenir from her recklessness in Seaforth.  “Snook…can we talk?”

“What about?”

She paused.  She knew the second she told him it was going to eat him alive that he wasn’t there.  She almost thought she shouldn’t tell him, but then that meant she wasn’t being honest.  Plus, once he saw her little souvenir, there was no way she could lie.  “You know…you know how I get when I go too far into my head sometimes,” she began.

“Of course, because I get the same way,” he said.  As she continued to stay silent, and only look at him through the mirror, he caught on that this wasn’t going to be a normal conversation.  “What’s wrong?”

She could barely look at him.  She was so ashamed, because she was going to scare and hurt him so much.  “I went to go tell Gareth,” she said, tears already welling in her eyes.  “I went to go tell Gareth and I almost got into an accident.”

“You what?” Ryan asked immediately.  “Whit, what do you mean?  Are you okay?  Are you hurt?”

“I’m fine.  I swerved out of the way just in time,” she said.  “I went—I went to St. James to visit Gareth and tell him about us.  I s-spent a lot of t-t-time there just t-t-talking to him, Snook.  And as I was driving b-back home – I was s-still just outside Mitchell – I—I kept thinking about G-G-Gareth and Snook, I don’t know what came over me— b-but all of the s-sudden I hear this loud horn and I’m ab-b-bout to clip this oncoming pickup truck—”

“Oh my fucking God, Whit,” he uttered nervously, spinning her around so they didn’t have to talk through a mirror anymore.  “Did you get hurt?”

She shook her head.  “No,  I swerved out of the way and I just…went on the side of the road and tried to calm down.  I just…” she trailed off, bringing her hands up to pull down the collar of her crew neck, exposing her “souvenir”: a loudly coloured red seat belt abrasion that ran diagonally down her collarbone and chest.  She quite literally heard Ryan’s breath catch in his throat at the sight.  “I already went to my doctor.  It looks bad but it doesn’t hurt too much.  She said it should be gone in two or three weeks.”

Ryan shook his head.  “Oh, Whit,” his voice quivered.  He brought a hand up and lightly, with his fingertips, traced the bruising along her skin.  He had to compose himself.  “Oh, Whit…” his eyes glossed over, the memories of that night in his pickup truck coming back to haunt him.

“Snook, I’m okay, I swear.  That’s not the issue here, anyway,” she tried to get his memory off it.  “I just…I miss him so much.”

Ryan was silent as he could only consider the how and why this happened to Whitney.  He was overcome with emotion at hearing what happened and seeing the abrasion, but what hurt her more was deeper.  “I miss him too, Whit.”

“He would have been your best man, right?” she asked, unable to stop herself from asking, from imagining what their wedding would be like if Gareth was still with them.  “God, can you just imagine what he’d be like at the wedding?  At the reception?  Why can’t I have my brother there, Snook?  Why does he have to be gone?”

“He would have been the life of the party,” Ryan offered, unable to say much else since his own tears were falling now.  “I miss him every day, Whit.  I want him to be with us, too.”

She reached up to wrap her arms around his shoulders, and he picked her up and brought her to the bed, sitting with her in his lap.  “I want to have him be here for the happiest moment of my life,” she said.

“I know you do.  We all do.”

“That’s why I was so sad.  And that’s why what happened, happened.  And I’m so sorry to scare you or make you worried—but I wanted to talk to him, Snook.  I wanted him to be the first to know.”

“We’re going to get through this,” he assured, nodding his head.  It was only natural that Whitney told Gareth first.  “Before we go to our parents’, I’m gonna see Gareth too.  We’ll go together.”

Whitney nodded her head, smiling slightly.  “That sounds nice.”

He let out a long sigh.  He tried not to think about how rough the stop had been if it left such a mark on Whitney’s skin.  “You’ve gotta be careful, Whit.  I mean it.  I just got you.  I can’t lose you.”

Whitney cupped Ryan’s face in her hands.  “You always had me, Snook.”

“You know what I mean.”

She leaned forward to kiss him quickly.  “I’m so happy you’re home, Snook.  I can’t wait to tell everyone tomorrow.”

Ryan finally smiled again.  “Me too.”

***

It was another beautiful spring day in southwestern Ontario.  The sun was out, there were only a few clouds in the sky, and although it was still a bit chilly out, it felt like people were finally awakening from their winter hibernation, ready to hit the ground running into spring and summer.  It was the perfect opportunity for Ryan and Whitney to take a drive. 

To Seaforth.

To St. James Catholic Cemetery.

With a small bouquet of flowers in his hand, Ryan made his way to the site he knew best, the site she could walk to with his eyes closed.  As he stood at the foot of Gareth’s grave, he kneeled and placed his bouquet delicately next to hers, still there from days previous.  He brought his hand to his lips and kissed it before placing it over Gareth’s engraved name on the headstone. 

“I love your sister, Gareth,” he began.  “I always have.  And the funny thing is, I think you know that.  I think you knew that when you were still here with us.  You never said anything, you never gave me funny looks—I don’t know, maybe I’m imagining it all or looking at it with rose coloured glasses because you’ve been gone for so long, but deep down inside me, I think you knew.  When you—when you were in your casket, the last time I spoke to you before they closed the coffin and I was one of your pallbearers, I told you I was going to take care of Whitney.  I want to think that I have.  She wants me to know I have, even though I made some pretty dumb mistakes along the way.  You—you gotta know that—I—I—” he stuttered out, trying to keep his emotions in check.  “I try my best, Gareth, because she’s my entire world.  She everything to me.  And I know you’re watching, so I just want you to know that I want to make everything right.  No more being scared.  No more waiting.  I’m going to get her a ring, and we’re going to get married, and we’re going to have a family.  And you’ll be part of it.  There’s not a day that goes by that I don’t think about you.  I just hope that on that day, the day that Whitney and I get married, that you’re there too.  Send us a sign, Gareth.  Send us a sign.”

***

James and Alice Napier invited Bonnie and Brian O’Reilly over anyway, so Ryan and Whitney didn’t even have to make two trips.  Because of course James and Alice would invite Brian and Bonnie over.  Hell, Brian and Bonnie were probably already there.  Alice was making frozen margaritas and Bonnie was laughing and saying something about it still being too cold for frozen margaritas when Ryan and Whitney walked through the door.  James was setting the table and Brian was cooking something on the stove.  They even mentioned Tara coming over for dessert (Alice had gotten a chocolate and peanut butter tart).  Ryan and Whitney gave each other a look from across the kitchen at one point, taking it all in.

Over dinner, they discussed the playoffs first.  Ryan was excited to get going with the Leafs, and everybody spoke about his work ethic and how he could help them.  Bonnie reminisced about when he’d skate every waking moment of the day he wasn’t in school at the Seaforth Community Centre with Cal, Owen, and Gareth, with Tara and Whitney in the stands.  James reminisced about driving the kids into Toronto on weeknights to watch Ryan’s GTHL games when he played for the Toronto Jr. Canadiens before getting drafted to the OHL.  Alice would prepare sandwiches as dinner for the road and they’d show up at the arena right on time.  Ryan would always wave to them when he got out onto the ice.  When the game was done, they’d wait for him to get out so they could give him long, warm hugs before piling back into the car and driving home.  Gareth and Whitney would be passed out in the back seat by the time they arrived home.

“There’s something Ryan and I have to talk to you guys about,” Whitney finally said as she played around with the last of the potatoes on her plate.  She looked up, and suddenly, all eyes were on her, before they moved to Ryan, then back to her.

Alice, James, Bonnie, and Brian genuinely looked taken aback.  “Is—is everything okay, honey?” her mom asked.

“It’s fine,” she assured Alice.

“Ryan?” Brian asked his son.

Ryan look one last look at Whitney, smiling slightly, before addressing everyone.  “Everything’s okay, dad,” he said gently.  “It’s just that…since I got to Toronto, Whitney and I have been doing a lot of talking.  And we’ve been doing a lot of talking about…well, us.”

“Okay…” James looked at his daughter, then back at Ryan.  “Us?”

“Us,” Ryan said definitively, nodding his head.  “I…Whitney and I have loved each other for a very long time.  There were a few things that got in the way of us being together that were mainly on me.  I hold myself to a very high standard – you all know that – and this was no different.  I wanted to be able to provide for her, to take care of her, and for years I felt like I couldn’t do that properly after what had happened in 2015,” he explained.

“Oh Ryan…” Bonnie cooed.

“How long is a very long time, dear?” Alice asked her daughter.

Ryan and Whitney agreed in the drive over that they had to be upfront and 100% honest about everything – every question their parents would ask.  “The first time Ryan and I kissed I was sixteen.  But I’d had feelings for him before that, too.  And since then.”

“Wait – so you’re admitting to us that things have been…happening…since then?” Brian asked.

“Yes,” Whitney answered.

“Through Calum and Aaron?” James asked.

“Yes.”

“Through Justine and Kayla?” Bonnie asked.

“Yes,” Ryan nodded.

“We’ve loved each other for a very, very long time,” Whitney reiterated, her heart beating in her chest as the moment came.  “Ryan and I have had a long talk and we don’t want to waste any more time.  Mom, dad, Bonnie, Brian – Ryan and I are going to get married this summer.”

There was a pause of silence.  “Married?” James asked Whitney.

“Married,” she was firm.

“Married?” James asked Ryan.

“Married,” he was firm.

The four parents shrieked out loud.  Whitney couldn’t help but laugh at their reactions – same with Ryan.  Alice even stood up from her seat and rushed over to Whitney, engulfing her in a hug.  “Oh my God oh my God oh my God!” Alice was overwhelmed with emotion as she hugged her daughter.  “I’m so so so happy!  I can’t believe it!”

“This is a lot of information to get all at once!” Bonnie joked, a huge smile on her face as she got up from her chair, too.  “You’re getting married!  You’re getting married!” she yelled as she hugged her son.

“This is the best news, kids,” Brian couldn’t hold back his emotion as he hugged them both.  “Oh goodness, this is – this is just magical.”

Ryan and Whitney could breathe a sigh of relief.  Truthfully, they thought there would be a lot more questions.  Perhaps even some “You cheated on people?” questions or more questions about how long and how far this had already gone.  But apparently not.  Maybe they always knew?  Maybe this was something their parents had been waiting for and they were just too nice to say it out loud.  Maybe their parents had seen it all those years ago and were just waiting for the news. 

In any case, the night turned into a celebration.  Brian rushed out to get some champagne.  When he came back, Tara, her husband, and their four kids were walking through the door with him.  When Tara asked what necessitated champagne, Ryan and Whitney told her the news.  She shrieked too.  They FaceTimed with Owen and his wife Bernadette, and then with Cal and Terra, and then with Shannon.

There was an almost overwhelming amount of joy.

Before they left, Alice brought Ryan and Whitney up to hers and James’s bedroom.  She dug into the back of her closet and retrieved an old cookie tin, opening it in front of them.  “I would have given this to your earlier if I had known,” she said, rummaging through the contents inside.

“What is it, mom?” Whitney asked.

“Ah!” she said, finding the small pouch she was looking for.  “This was your great grandmother’s – from Scotland, when she got married in the 1920s,” she said, handling the pouch delicately as she took out a plain gold band.

Whitney had never seen it before in her life.  Her jaw dropped as her mom held it up between her fingers.  “Oh my God, mom,” she gasped.

“She gave it to me when we met her in North Berwick on our family trip.  She thought you were just so darling when she saw you, so beautiful and so kind and the best type of Gray woman, and she wanted you to have it, my baby.”

“What?  Are you serious?”

“Mhmm,” Alice nodded her head.  “It’s too big for your dainty fingers,” she half-joked, “but what I was thinking is, you can melt it down into something that fits, and any extra can be used for the prongs—”

“Or it could be put into my ring too,” Ryan said lightly.  “Whit’s not just becoming an O’Reilly.  I’m becoming a member of your family too.”

Whitney and Alice smiled at the thought.  “You two can do with it what you see fit,” she said, placing it back in its pouch.  As she handed it to Whitney, Alice smiled.  “One day, maybe you’ll be able to give it to your daughter too.”

In that moment it was Whitney’s only hope.

***

When Whitney and Ryan stepped foot into their house in Goderich, they were still on a sort of high from the events of hours prior.  They weren’t jumping off the walls, but they were buzzing.  It was getting later in the day, but they didn’t feel tired at all.  They couldn’t stop smiling.  They couldn’t sit or stand still. 

“That went surprisingly well,” Whitney couldn’t help but giggle out slightly, looking at Ryan. 

“You think?” he joked.  “My mom was already talking about taking all my old clothes out of storage and washing them.”

Whitney smiled, thinking back to all the clothes her mom kept too.  Now the clothes would definitely be retro and very 90s, but she was sure there were some nice vintage sweaters in those boxes – specifically old Leafs sweaters or anything knit that grandparents made.  “It would be cool to see, though.  I had this one sweater with Belle on it from Beauty and the Beast that I loved.  I wonder if she still has it or if I wore it out from wearing it so much.”

“Oh my God, you were obsessed with that movie,” Ryan smiled.  “I remember having to put it in the VCR for you all the time.  You used to sing along with all the songs but with the wrong words.”

“Well thank God I got better at singing, hmm?” she asked.

“Oh yeah.  I love listening to you sing over Taylor Swift in the car.”

“Hey!” she snapped playfully.  “I’m good!  I’m on tune!  And I know all the words!”

Ryan was smiling with his eyes.  She knew he loved her singing, even if he screamed over it in jest when she did.  This was the man who learned Taylor Swift songs for her on his guitar just because she wanted him to.  “Go get comfy on the couch.  I’ll be there in a sec.”

Whitney just assumed that Ryan would go to the washroom or something.  But when he came back into the family room carrying one of his guitars he took off the wall in their bedroom, Whitney found herself smiling from ear to ear.  “Ryyyy,” she cooed.

He sunk into the couch, sitting upright with his legs outstretched.  “Come sit like you always do,” he began to say, but before he even finished the sentence, Whitney was moving to sit where she always would when he played guitar like this, their legs entwined.  Far enough to watch him strum, close enough to lean in for a kiss.  The perfect position.  “What do you want me to play?”

“Whatever you want.”

“You don’t have a request?” he played a few quiet precautionary strums.

Whitney shook her head.  “You haven’t played in so long because of your finger.  I’ll enjoy anything.”

Ryan thought for a few moments, strumming absent-mindedly before leaving the sound of the strings to fade out.  Then he began to play some familiar chords – it took a few moments for Whitney to realize what song it was, but when she did, she couldn’t help but smile. 

Oh darlin’ I feel your pain

And the summer rain in your eyes

Trying so hard to put the blue

Back into your sky

It was “The Plan” by Matt Mays and El Torpedo – one of the bands that they’d listen to whenever driving the country roads, especially those on the way to the beach.  And he’d chosen the song he’d sing to her when they’d call each other and she would cry over the phone about missing him while he was in Colorado. 

Oh darlin’ I’ve been dreamin’ of you

Have you been praying for me?

As I cast my mind and soul to the sea

I’ve got a plan that’ll get you through

Whitney hummed along as Ryan sang to her, shivers running up her spine as they locked eyes and he sang “Cause for me it all comes down to you” to her.  Her hand squeezed his calf gently, her eyes welling with tears slightly at the tender moment.  He’d sung to her numerous times before – over FaceTime, at campfires, when they were the only ones left standing at 4am after his Stanley Cup party – but this was extra special.  Snook was hers now, and she got to look forward to this for the rest of her life.

When Ryan finished singing, he noticed the welling in her eyes.  Before he could mention it, Whitney spoke first.  “Do you think it was always meant to be us, Snook?”

“Yes,” he nodded automatically.  “It’s always been you, beautiful.”

“I love you so damn much.  And after this past week, there’s just been so much more.  Sometimes I don’t know what to do with it all.”

Ryan leaned forward, placing a kiss on her lips.  “Soon, you’ll be able to put it into our marriage,” he said, causing her to smile.  “We’ve love each other since we were kids and we still have so much love to give.  Isn’t that amazing?”

Whitney nodded.  “The most amazing thing.”

He leaned forward and kissed her one more time.  “Can I keep singing to you?”

“Do you even have to ask?”

***

Ryan and Whitney made it back into Toronto on Saturday morning just in time to make their 11:30 brunch reservations at United Bakers Dairy Restaurant in North York with Morgan and Bee.  Whitney had probably become closest with her in her short time of knowing the other partners – they got along well and had the same opinions on so many things.  And while Whitney was also close to Aberdeen and Aryne, she and Bee were only days apart – Whitney felt a special connection with her for some reason.  She had an inkling that they would be lifelong friends.

Morgan and Bee waved them down from the booth the moment they saw Ryan and Whitney waiting at the front.  After making their way through their restaurant and greeting each other with hugs, they sat in the booth together.  Coffee was poured.  Orders were taken.  Bagels were chosen.  Whitney was excited for her lox and cream cheese platter.

“This is for you,” Bee said as she handed an envelope towards Whitney.  “It’s an invitation for our wedding this summer.  We’re really hoping you’ll be able to attend.”

Whitney opened it immediately.  It would probably give her some inspiration for her own.  “Oh my goodness!  Of course we’ll come,” she said, showing it to Ryan too.  “Look how pretty.  Oooooh, it’s at the King Eddie?  How divine.”

“I know, right?  We were so lucky we booked early.  Now it’s fully booked something like 18 months in advance.”

Ryan smiled, turning his head to look at Whitney.  “Fully booked for 18 months?  Looks like we can’t have our wedding there, then.”

Everything stopped.  Whitney was grinning at Ryan like the Cheshire cat.  She looked towards Morgan and Bee and saw them giving confused, dead stares.  “Um, excuse me?” Morgan asked.

“Wait, what?” Bee added.

Whitney smiled at her.  “We’ve been hiding something from everybody,” she said.  “Snook and I are getting married.”

Bee shrieked, her hands coming up to cover her dropped jaw.  A few people from surrounding booths eyed them, but only momentarily.  Morgan didn’t even bother covering his jaw drop.  “Come again?!” he demanded.

Ryan and Whitney couldn’t help but giggle.  “It’s a long story, but, well…Whitney and I have loved each other since we were kids, and about a week ago, we decided to stop being stupid about it all and just get married, which, deep down, is what we’ve both wanted all along.”

“Eeeeeeeeeeeeep!” Bee shrieked, clapping excitedly at the news.  “Married!  You’re getting married!  God, you’re both lucky that we’re having brunch because I’m going to need to know the whole story and all its details!” she exclaimed to everyone’s laughter.  “And your ring!  Where’s your ring!”

“That’s for this afternoon,” Ryan chimed in.  “I’ve already called my guy.”

Morgan nudged Bee slightly.  “You should give Whitney her gift.  It all works out.”

Whitney’s brows furrowed.  “Gift?  What gift?”

Bee reached for something beneath the table.  “Listen, I didn’t want to overstep my boundary or anything, but I knew that I had to include you in this or else I’d live to regret it,” she began.  Bee wasn’t going to tell Whitney about Aberdeen having a feeling from the very beginning that they were more than friends, or how she saw her and Ryan kiss against their car that one night after the game.  “It would have felt wrong not to give you one since you’ve joined us, and especially since we’ve gotten so close.”

Bee handed over a folded up jacket from across the table.  Whitney immediately knew what it was.  “My very first jacket,” she smiled, noticing the ribbing, the vintage font, and of course the 90 on the sleeve.  She unfolded it, getting a good look at it before looking over at Ryan.  “My first one.”

“Get used to it.  You’re going to be wearing it for a while starting Tuesday.”

***

Ryan and Whitney went to the jeweler but Ryan didn’t let Whitney see the diamond.  “I want at least something to be a surprise,” he said, and Whitney was anxious but acquiesced.  They chose their wedding bands to be prepared for the summer.  Her finger was measured and her great-grandmother’s ring given to the jeweler to melt down and craft the engagement ring.  “This will be rushed, Mr. O’Reilly, for you only.  But the craftsmanship – I guarantee you that I will be taking of it, and it will not suffer.  Everything else will be put on hold to get this done for Wednesday.”

When they got back home, there was no reason to wait.  They climbed up to their bedroom and began kissing each other fervently, the wait of the day just acting as a slight form of torture.  With the playoffs beginning on Tuesday, Whitney knew Ryan would be mentally preparing.  And she, for her part, had to plan a wedding that would happen in only a few months.  This would, at least, be a little moment to themselves before things became hectic. 

Ryan dragged his hands all over her body but paid particular attention to her breasts, cupping and squeezing them through the fabric of her top.  He imagined that in a few short months, he would be doing this exact same thing except Whitney would be in her wedding dress.  And if they had their way, just a few short months after that, her belly would start to swell because they’d be having a baby.  His brain rushed through the possibilities of what their family would look like.  “Take this off,” he huffed.

He helped her pull it over her head, discarding it absent-mindedly somewhere on the floor.  He picked her up and she wrapped her legs around his torso, barely stopping her kissing.  When she felt herself being dropped onto the bed, she began tugging on his shirt, too.  “Off.  Off.”

It came off within seconds.  Her favourite part of Ryan (that was a lie – all of Ryan was her favourite part of him) was on full display for her.  Ryan stopped momentarily to see the red streak that still appeared on her skin from the seatbelt.  Whitney was wise enough to wear high-cut tops in front of their parents and Morgan and Bee so no questions were asked and no emotions ran high.  But when he saw it again, he couldn’t help the aching feeling in his heart.  He dipped his head down and began leaving light kisses along it, as if they would cure her, as if with every kiss, a patch of redness would disappear.  “It’ll be gone soon, Snook…” she could only breath out.

“I know.  It just hurts to see,” he whispered.  “Do you remember your promise to me?”

She nodded her head.  “Do you remember your promise to me?”

He nodded too.  “Of course.”

She kissed him.  “In a couple months, you’ll be doing this to me in my wedding dress,” she said.

Ryan couldn’t help but chuckle.  “Funny you say that, because I was just thinking the same thing.”

“And then after that,” she continued, giving him another kiss, “we’ll be going at it even more than we do now, because you’re gonna fuck a baby into me.”  She got so turned on by the grunt he let out at the words as she kissed him again, her kisses becoming more frantic.  “Isn’t that right, Snook?”

“Fuck yes,” he barely let out.

“I can’t wait to feel my body swell with your baby.  You’re going to fill me full of your hot cum over and over.  We’re gonna have a big family like we both had.  Will you be excited to fill my pussy?  To see me pregnant with your babies?”

“Yes, yes, fuck yes,” his own voice was frantic now, the thought of what she was saying turning him on.  She cupped his crotch and could feel his growing member being restrained in his pants.  She fiddled with his belt, trying to set him free.  He pulled off her leggings easily, and helped her snake the belt around the loops before throwing it on the floor and undoing the zipper himself.

“I want you to fuck me, Ry,” she breathed out, switching his nickname, grabbing onto his biceps and sinking her nails into them.  “I need it.”

“Yeah?  You want me to fuck you?” he asked.  She gulped as she nodded her head.  She felt him push her body and flip it over in an instant.  “Get on your hands and knees for me.”

Whitney did as she was told.  Easily.  She got on her hands and knees for Ryan, looking behind her to see him practically tearing off his pants.  She arched her back to give him a better view.  “You like what you see?”

“Fuckin’ right,” he growled.

She looked over her shoulder, tossing her hair dramatically for effect.  “Just for you, Ry,” she winked.  “This is aaalllll for you.”

He couldn’t help but chuckle at the tone of voice she was using, and the thing she did with her hair that she knew would drive him wild.  “You know just what to say and do to get me aaalllll riled up, don’t you?” he asked, mimicking her voice and the way she said the word.

“I’ve had a little bit of practice,” she said sarcastically.

Ryan grabbed her hips, pulling her body towards his before one hand went back to stroke his cock.  His other hand began playing with her pussy, teasing her lips and making her mewl.  “You like me teasing your pussy like that?” he asked.

“Yes Ry,” he watched as she nodded, watching as she moved her body in sync with his strokes for maximum effect.  “But I love your cock inside me more.  Any way you give it to me.  Because it was made for my pussy.”

He made sure to tease her entrance with his cock, gliding it up and down her pussy slowly before finally pushing it in.  Whitney gasped at the feeling, letting out a moan.  When he was fully inside her, he grabbed her hair and brought her up so her back was flush against his chest.  He moved some hair away from her ear so he could whisper.  “On Wednesday, after we get back from the jeweler, I’m going to bring you back here and fuck you while you wear nothing but that ring.”

Whitney smiled at the proposition.  “Sounds perfect,” she said.  “I’m looking forward to it.  The first thing that signifies I’m becoming Mrs. Whitney O’Reilly.”

It was the first time either of them had said what would be her new name out loud.  Whitney O’Reilly.  It had a beautiful ring to it.  Ryan found himself repeating it over and over in his head.  Whitney O’Reilly.  Whitney O’Reilly.  Whitney O’Reilly.  “That’s right,” he whispered again.  “The perfect ring for the most perfect girl.”

“I’ll be sure to send you some pictures of me wearing it with that pretty pink set that you like,” she continued.  “You know, the one with the garter belt?  The thigh highs with the lace?  Maybe I’ll even send ones wearing just your jersey.  I know how much you enjoyed those the last time.  You can look at them while you’re alone in your hotel room in Tampa and my pussy is empty and waiting for your cum to fill it up.”

Ryan let out a grunt at the thought.  “Because I’m the only one that gets to come in your pussy.”

“That’s right, baby.”

“You gonna take my cock like a good girl?”

“Mhmmm,” she nodded, biting her lip in excitement.

He pushed her back down onto the bed, holding her down as her ass and hips were up, waiting for him to move.  He didn’t take it slowly after their discussion; instead, he began thrusting into her so deep that he could see her grab the sheets and her knuckles get white.  She didn’t take it quietly, either, screaming his name over and over between moans and sighs.  “Oooooh fuck, Ry, it’s so deep—”

“—Take it, take it—”

“Harder, Ry.  I want it deeper.”

Ryan grabbed hold of her hips and put as much force into it as he could without hurting her.  She got louder, and he could feel her come for the first time shortly after.  Her body began to flush red, the walls of her hot pussy squeezing around his cock.  Her legs were so shaky she even lowered slightly, though Ryan made sure to pull her hips up quickly after.  He slapped her ass, causing her to yelp in unexpected excitement.  “Keep your ass up, sweetness.”

“Yes Ry,” she barely nodded.  “I want more.”

He spanked her again.  “Like that?”

Her knuckles got white from clutching the sheets again.  “Just like that.”

He spanked her again.  “I want you to count how many times I make you come.  Understood?”

“Yes.  I promise.”

Ryan continued to fuck her; continued to feel her orgasms rush throughout her body as they built up sweat from the pace and how long they were lasting.  After God knows how long, Ryan wanted more.  He grabbed a handful of Whitney’s hair and yanked her up so her back was flush against his chest again.  He combed her hair off her sweaty forehead with his fingers before placing his hand at the base of her neck.  “You okay, Whit?” he whispered tenderly in her ear.

She nodded.  “It’s a lot, but it feels so good,” she said.  “I—I can take one more.”

He felt a shiver run up his spine.  Once he knew she was okay, he knew what he wanted to do, what he needed to do, to give her what she wanted.  “Look at me.”  She craned her neck to do so.  One hand had stayed at the base of her neck, but the other came up to her face.  “Open your mouth, sweetness.”

She inhaled sharply, so fucking turned on, before doing what she was told.  He stuck his fingers in her mouth and her lips closed around them, her tongue swirling to get them wet.  When he took them out, he still kept them close.  “Spit.”

She spit on his fingers, and watched with heightened anticipation as they lowered further down until they finally fixated directly onto her clit.  “Holy shit, Ry.”

“Give me one more like a good girl and then you can get my cum in your hot pussy,” Ryan said.  “Okay?”

“Yes baby, yes.”

Holding her body up with one arm, rubbing her clit with his other hand, and using his body to fuck her senseless, Ryan could feel his orgasm building as Whitney got louder and louder.  He watched as she closed her eyes shut, watched as she threw her head back into him, watched as her body began to shake as one hand clasped at his hand on her neck.  “Ry—Ry—fill me—”

“—Come for me, sweetness—”

“—Fill me up with your cum, Ry.”

He finally exploded inside of her, her entire body trembling at the feeling of her orgasm spreading throughout her entire body as she screamed and cried out in pleasure.  He had to hold her up in his arms or else she would have completely collapsed onto the bed, but he was so close to doing so himself, too.  Instead, he leaned back slightly, allowing her body to lean back and almost collapse into his.  Their breaths were hoarse, their bodies still trembling, his cock still inside her.

He felt around her pussy and the insides of her thighs and they were so slick, so wet.  He placed a gentle kiss on her temple.  “How many?” he asked.

A small, tired smile crept onto her face.  She had been so thoroughly fucked she couldn’t think straight.  “Lucky number seven.  At least.”

“At least?”

“It gets blurry sometimes,” she tried to explain in as few words as possible.  “You know what you can do to me.”

Ryan couldn’t help but smile.  “You want to keep my cock in you as we lie here?”

Whitney nodded.  “Don’t you dare take it out.”

***

Later that night, Whitney tried on her new jacket.  It fit easily enough, and she took a mirror selfie for Bee to show her.  After she took the photo, Ryan walked into the room.  “Playoff ready?” he asked, looking at her through the mirror. 

“You bet,” she nodded.  “Are you ready?”

Ryan nodded too.  “I’m ready.”

[zackcollins]

a new hockey stick || tyler heineman

masterlist

Author’s Note: Hilo Piccolo. Somebody said I was feeding “the Tyler Heineman brain rot” when I posted that GIF of him earlier. The brain will be beyond rotted now since this is a whole ass fic about him. If I have a problem, I challenge you to prove it in a court of law. Seeing as this fic isn’t even for my own self-indulgence. I wrote it for @donttelltheelff​ because they told me that I might be making them gain a crush on Tyler. I wrote this for them as a way of nudging them over the precipice. What’re friends for, amirite? Anyways! GIF credit to anotherhockeypage since my GIF of him is a zoomed out shot lmfao

Warnings: Nothing, I don’t think. Feel free to let me know if something needs one though. I’ll happily add it.

Word Count: 1.0k+

Title: Canadian Kid by Brett Kissel

Additional: Gender-neutral reader since the person this was originally for uses they/them pronouns. I have received permission to post it so we’re all set on that front. Anyways! I hope Taylor and everyone else enjoys this! This is my first fic of this kind for this goofball babygirl so I hope I did it justice!! Feedback is welcomed and appreciate because I love knowing what people think of my fics!!

You and Tyler were rushing through Scotiabank Arena in hopes of making it to your seats before the opening face-off. As you rushed along, you were bumping into disgruntled fans and a few employees. You kept trying to apologize but Tyler was dragging you along far too quickly for anything to come of them.

When you finally made it to the section where your seats were located, you glanced over your shoulder towards the ice. You mentally fist-bumped when you noticed that the game hadn’t started yet. You told Tyler as much; Tyler smiled as you both politely squeezed past the people sitting between the end of the row and your seats.

When the two of you were seated, you pulled out your phone and slung your arm over Tyler’s shoulder. You pulled your best friend closer to you as you opened the camera function and held the phone out in front of you.

“Tyler, bro, smile,” you said, casting a glance at you best friend. "This is my first time seeing a hockey game live. I want a picture to commemorate it."

"Sure, bud, whatever you want." Tyler rolled his eyes and chuckled, though he did smile. He even slung his arm around your shoulders and leaned his head against your head. You felt your mouth go dry and your face heat up as you quickly snapped the picture. You hoped that the picture wouldn’t show how flustered Tyler had just made you feel.

Just as you were sliding your phone back into the kangaroo pouch on your Auston Matthews hoodie, you felt someone nudge your shoulder. You looked up and noticed Tyler was pointing towards the ice. When you looked that way, you saw that the Kings and Maple Leafs were lining up for the opening face-off. You smiled as you shifted around anxiously in your seat. Tyler scoffed and shook his head as he looked towards centre ice.

When the referee dropped the puck, you felt your whole body ignite with excitement and nervousness. This was an experience unlike anything you had ever had watching the games on your television at home.

As the play went along, you kept looking over at your best friend to see how he was reacting to all of this. You knew that Tyler had been to plenty of live games before, given the fact that he was also a goalie growing up. He was even wearing his favourite jersey—a Kelly Hrudey his father had handed down to him when he had first started playing Junior A hockey. You weren’t so much as looking at the jersey; you were more so looking to see how Tyler was reacting to the fact that his favourite team—Los Angeles—was playing your favourite team—Toronto—while you were attending your first game. Judging by your best friend’s body language, you could assume that Tyler was about as nervous as you were.

By the time the first commercial break came along, the score was still 0-0 and the shots were 10-4 in favour of Los Angeles. You pulled your phone out again and wanted to ask Tyler for another picture but Tyler nudging your shoulder stopped the words from coming out.

"(Y/N), look," Tyler mumbled.

"Is something wrong?" You put your phone away before you looked in Tyler’s direction and noticed that he was pointing up at the Jumbotron.

You looked where Tyler was pointing and noticed that the Kiss Cam was showing yourself and Tyler inside of the heart frame. You swallowed thickly before looking over at Tyler. Tyler nodded and grabbed your face, smoothing his thumbs across your cheeks. You relaxed a little as you leaned forward, placing your hands on Tyler's shoulders. After taking a deep breath, you closed the remaining distance and connected your lips with your best friend's lips.

The kiss was sweet, albeit brief. When you pulled apart from Tyler, you felt your head spinning from the gravity of the situation. You shook your head once and rubbed your temples a couple of times in hopes of straightening out the feelings in your brain. When that didn't work, you looked at Tyler.

Tyler had a soft smile on his face and was nervously wringing his hands together in his lap. You put one of your hands on top of Tyler's and rubbed his wrists at the pulse points, smiling when you felt Tyler shiver.

"Did…" Tyler started, looking away from you and towards the ice. When you glanced at the ice, you saw Mikheyev and Kerfoot rushing towards the net with Moore as the only man back defending for the Kings. "I… That meant more to me than a stupid Kiss Cam kiss. I've wanted to fucking do that for ages, (Y/N)." Tyler looked at you, his facial expression somewhere between fond and sad.

You brought your other hand up and cupped Tyler's cheek. You gently ran your thumb along it, smiling when he leaned into the touch.

"I feel the same way, bro," you said, squeezing Tyler's wrist with your other hand. "Would this be our first date then?"

Nodding, Tyler smiled softly. "I like that idea a lot."

You smiled as you leaned over and connected your lips with Tyler’s. Tyler smiled into the kiss, bringing his hands up to grab your hoodie strings. As you kissed, Tyler continued to fiddle with the strings like his life depended on it. The more he fiddled with them, the harder it was for you to keep a straight face. Eventually, you had to pull back and chuckle. You swatted Tyler's shoulder and shook your head dismissively.

"Way to ru--"

You went to say something but the sound of the Leafs goal horn and the goal song simultaneously blaring through the arena cut you off. You grinned as you pressed a quick kiss to Tyler's cheek.

"Take that, Tyler," you said, voice dripping with smugness.

Tyler smirked as he leaned forward to whisper into your ear.

"We'll see later which one of us takes it."

[sandybrett]

The Slings & Arrows timeline

[Reposted from my previous blog, which I'm going to deactivate soon.]

I’ve attempted to compile as much information as possible about the timeline of Slings & Arrows as a resource for myself and other fic writers. By “resource” I do not mean “definitive guide,” because, as I suspected going in, it does not hold together very well. There’s one obvious inconsistency—Richard has supposedly been at the festival for eight years, but doesn’t know Geoffrey. There’s a sense I get, which I’ve seen at least one other person agree with but I don’t know if anyone else does, that based on the way everyone talks about the famous Hamlet and how much Oliver and Ellen have aged since then, it must have been more than seven years ago.

Under a cut for length and spoilers.

S1E1 • The Toronto Maple Leafs were eliminated in the first round of the 2003 Stanley Cup playoffs, so the 2003 season at New Burbage has to have opened in mid-April. (Apparently the guy sitting behind the Minister of Culture during the show is a Philadelphia Fliers fan.) • Kate saw Geoffrey’s Hamlet when she was 12, which would put her at 19 now. • Oliver has directed the Dream 10 times. Ellen has played Titania 6 times. Stratford does the Dream roughly every five years. • Basil says “Here’s to another 25 years with the festival.” He doesn’t explicitly say Ellen’s already been with the festival for 25 years, but that seems to be the implication. If we assume she has a college degree, she must be at least 48, meaning she would have played Ophelia at 41. If we assume she arrived as a teenager, like Kate, she’s more like 44 and played Ophelia at 37. Either way, it would mean she had already been with the festival 18 years by the time of Geoffrey’s breakdown. • This is the festival’s 44th season, meaning the festival was founded in 1959. • Oliver saw Burton’s Hamlet in ’64, and it sounds like he was an adult. That would put him at least in his early 60s. • Oliver seems to claim that his sleeping with Ellen was responsible for Geoffrey’s great performance. Obviously this is a stretch, and Oliver later admits it wasn’t true. But I doubt he would be even making that claim if he had slept with Ellen between the second and third shows, as many fans have assumed. It sounds like they slept together before the show opened. • Ellen angrily whispers “Tell him!” to Oliver, confirming that they’ve already slept together by opening night. But Geoffrey doesn’t know. So Oliver is claiming that by sleeping with Ellen and not telling Geoffrey about it, he somehow made a major difference in Geoffrey’s performance. • Past!Ellen still seems to be of typical childbearing age—probably closer to 37 than 41. Although given that Geoffrey is extremely drunk and probably already not in the best mental health, he might be overestimating how easy it would be for Ellen to get pregnant.

S1E2 • Anna knows Geoffrey, but Richard doesn’t, even though Richard has supposedly been with the festival for eight years. • One of the speakers at the funeral met Oliver at the Manitoba Theatre Center in 1978. • Geoffrey says “There was a kind of electricity in this place I have not experienced anywhere else,” which I’m guessing means his professional theatre experience is not limited to New Burbage and Theatre Sans Argent.

S1E3 • Geoffrey’s other roles at New Burbage included Romeo, Mark Antony, and Prince Hal. It’s not specified whether he played Antony in Julius Caesar or Antony and Cleopatra. • Darren directed Titus Andronicus in ’97, one year after Geoffrey’s breakdown. Geoffrey seems to have seen it, implying he was out of the hospital by then. • Geoffrey stormed the stage in the middle of a college performance. Admittedly, it’s implied to have been an insensitive one, but still, this suggests to me that he already had some mental health issues. • Geoffrey and Ellen played “all the great love scenes” together—probably an exaggeration, but there was definitely more than just R+J and Hamlet.

S1E6

    •    The actor playing Laertes was named Brian, and seems to have been someone both Ellen and Geoffrey knew well. Is it the same Brian we meet in Season 2? He looks way too young. There could easily be two different Brians—after all, there are two different Barbaras. You’d think if there were multiple Brians Geoffrey might distinguish among them, but then again, Ellen probably remembers which Brian played her brother.

    •    This is kind of a tangent, but does anyone else get the sense our heroes have more of a history with Basil than we’re being told about?

    •    At this point Claudius is not being played by Brian Cabot, but by a guy named Alan.

    •    The end credits distinguish the past and present actors by listing Jack’s castmates as “Horatio” and Geoffrey’s as “Horatio (1996)”, confirming that the show does take place in 2003.

S2E1 • Kate receives and accepts a marriage proposal from a well-established actor, which makes me doubt that she’s really supposed to be 19 or 20. • When Ellen asks whether Geoffrey really hasn’t slept with anyone in 8 years, Geoffrey says “You have to remember I was in an asylum.” I think this implies he was hospitalized for a fairly long time.

S2E2 • Veronica Tennant is a real person; I don’t think she’s supposed to be related to Geoffrey. • Geoffrey says he’s known Ellen for ten years. Does that include the seven-year gap? If so, they only knew each other for two years pre-Hamlet; if not, it’s more like nine years. Two is highly unlikely given the number of times they’re implied to have acted together, but possible given the structure of the New Burbage season (see S2E6). Nine seems a little too long but is plausible, although presumably they weren’t dating for that entire time. • Henry refers to New Burbage as “home”, implying he spent a substantial chunk of his early career there. It’s not clear how much he overlapped with Geoffrey and Ellen.

S2E3 • Henry and Brian played Hal and Falstaff opposite each other. It was probably since the disastrous Hamlet if Brian is indeed the same Brian who played Laertes. Henry has also played Hamlet, and Macbeth three times.

S2E5 • Oliver directed Geoffrey in R+J twice, and the first one was 20 years ago—12 years before Hamlet. He was upstaging Mercutio during the Queen Mab speech, so he was either Romeo or Benvolio. • Ellen played Paulina in The Winter’s Tale at some point.

S2E6 • Darren and Geoffrey were in college together in 1980. If they were freshmen, that would mean Geoffrey was about 34 at the time of his breakdown and 41 when he returned to the festival. • Sarah says that Romeo and Juliet is going to run for twelve weeks. This implies that New Burbage productions don’t run for the entire season the way Stratford productions do, which would also explain why, in Season 1, Hamlet starts later in the season than the Dream despite being the flagship production. If we assume that this season, like the previous season, opens in mid-April, Romeo and Juliet would only run until mid-July. Then, if the next set of plays opens immediately afterward and runs for twelve weeks, the season ends in mid-October.

S3E2 • Ellen says “We’re not in the Young Company anymore” implying that she and Geoffrey were both in the New Burbage Young Company. • Ellen was in Three Sisters with Charles at the National Arts Center—she played Masha, Barbara played Olga, and I’m guessing from their relative ages that Charles played Chebutykin. This seems to be the only time they’ve worked together, so presumably he hasn’t worked at New Burbage much during Ellen and Geoffrey’s adult lives, unless Ellen and Charles just happened to never be cast in the same play. • Geoffrey and Charles, however, have obviously worked together quite a bit, but we never learn where or when. • Barbara has been cast as Ellen’s older sister twice, so I’m guessing either they’re very close in age or Barbara’s a bit older. Barbara is getting hot flashes earlier than expected, which would imply that Ellen is not yet getting hot flashes.

S3E3 • Oliver directed Geoffrey in seven plays at New Burbage. This does not eliminate the possibility that he could have directed Geoffrey in more plays elsewhere, or that Geoffrey was in other plays at New Burbage with other directors.

S3E5 • Ellen says that she and Barbara were “roommates on tour,” implying that’s how they met. I don’t know whether this was for Three Sisters or something else. Judging from the fact that Geoffrey already knows Barbara, this seems to have been before Ellen and Geoffrey got together. Ellen was apparently “crazy about” a guy named Mike Greenfield, whom she found having sex with a girl named Mary in the green room. • When Barbara says she and Ellen are “bitter and menopausal,” Ellen starts to say “I’m not—” and then breaks off. She’s admitted to being “bitter” in the past, and “I’m not menopausal!” would be the funnier response, so this is further evidence that Ellen is not yet menopausal. • Barbara says that Ellen’s been at New Burbage “her whole life,” although clearly there’s been at least one short break.

S3E6 • Frank says he’s been with New Burbage “ever since it was a tent,” even though, according to S1E3, he wasn’t there for Geoffrey’s breakdown.

Other notes • In 2003, Paul Gross and Mark McKinney both turned 44, Martha Burns turned 46, Stephen Ouimette turned 49,  Don McKellar turned 40, Susan Coyne turned 45, and Rachel McAdams and Luke Kirby both turned 25. (Of course, Rachel McAdams played a high school student in Mean Girls that same year.) Paul Gross would have been 41 when he played Hamlet at Stratford. Martha Burns played Ophelia at some point before that, but I wasn’t able to find any indication of when. • It’s never explained what differentiates the apprentices from the Young Company, except that the Young Company get large roles instead of playing “maids and fairies.” If we accept that Kate really is supposed to be 19 when we meet her, perhaps apprenticeships are for college students on vacations or actors starting their careers directly out of high school, whereas the Young Company is for people who’ve just finished their acting degrees. However, that seems not to have been how it was for the Stratford Young Company, on which the New Burbage one is presumably modeled: Susan Coyne was in several Young Company productions when she was nearly thirty and had already performed in a regular production at Stratford.

Additions, theories, input from people who know more about theatre than I do all welcome!

[songbirds-sweet]

Sadly I'm a Canadian who doesn't watch hockey, though I cheer for the national team during World events. An Ex liked the Leafs so I kind of secretly root for them (but don't tell him 🙊).

What's your team? Are you an avid fan? Been to a game? Do you play yourself?

Are your parents as into music as you? I like to hear that. I'm the only music fanatic in mine. They all like music but aren't really "into" it, you know what I mean.

I love Audible. It's great for when I'm hiking. That's how I "read" the Hip book though I did buy the actual book too. Gotta fill that bookshelf, right? And I do love when the artist narrates the book themselves. It really makes it personal.

Indigo is great. I can't enter a store or go online just to browse without buying something. I love it for buying gifts for kids I know. I try to encourage reading as much as possible. I learned to love it as a kid when I won a spelling bee at 9 yrs old and won a book. Do you remember when you discovered literature?

Fic is definitely an underrated art form. I still marvel that people share it for free. So much creativity shared for all to enjoy. It's so wonderful.

Hobbies are basic. Listening to music. Reading. Watching movies. Hiking.

I'm not an overly creative person or I've not yet found the thing that brings out my creativity should I say.

What was your first memory of Christmas?

🤶

I fully understand! Honestly I mostly watch hockey when it's the playoffs. My dad is a hardcore Toronto Maple Leafs fan and I'm also a fan! Never been to a game and I can't stake for the life of me 😂

My mom not so much but she LOVES Prince and she went to the GVF concert with me in Toronto back in August! My dad is more into music and that's where I got some of his taste like classic rock.

SAME HERE! Maybe one day I'll try Audible but I gotta use my Plum Plus perks 😂 Yeah I'm the same way. That's amazing for what you do and how you discovered! I've always been into reading since I was a kid! I know the first book I ever really fell in love with and to this day it's my favourite classic novel is Anne Of Green Gables.

I LOVE all of those hobbies!!! Mine are reading, listening to music, and not a hobby but I practice in witchcraft so I'm researching a lot!

All I remember was every year on Christmas Eve (except we stopped going to years ago), we would go to my dad's side of the family and have a Christmas party. I used to hang out with my cousins a lot but I don't really talk to them much now (long story)

What is your Christmas tradition?

[luvmmarner]

upcoming fics

✭ = angst

♡ = fluff

*   = smut Jared McCann - The Good and the Bad ✭♡

// Jared didn’t seem to listen or care about your feelings. That was until he finally decided to listen.

Hate Me (Series)*✭♡

// Madison's brother James Riemsdyk played for the Philadelphia Flyers, who were rivals with the New Jersey Devils. So that meant Madison hated Jack, particularly on the ice towards her brother's team. She sees Jack as a cocky, arrogant selfish hockey player. However one drunk night Madison's opinion of Jack changed. She is aware that she can’t love her brother's rival. But she can’t help but fall in love with the boy she’s supposed to hate.

Mitch Marner - Undelivered ✭

// You were never meant to be together, so you broke up. You guys talked here and there. But then your messages started to go undelivered.

Anthony Cirelli - Together ♡✭

// Sequel to ‘I hate u not’. When you awoke in Anthony's bed from the previous night with no recollection of anything. You made the decision to leave and block him. But gradually you started to recall that evening. Recognizing that you made a mistake in leaving.

Michael Bunting - Fan Girl ♡

// You were a Toronto Maple Leafs fan more specifically Michael Bunting. Then one game he gave you a puck that so happened to have his number on it.

Nico Hischiner - I Love You ♡ // After dating for a year. You finally say those words he has been waiting to hear. (DELAYED)

[hockeyisit]

Break In.

Summary: Someone breaks into Auston's apartment.

A.N. Hey guys its been a while!!! I hope your all doing okay if not feel free to send me a message and we can talk whenever! Sorry its been so long since I've been on I've just been really busy lately. I hope you guys enjoy this short story. Feel free to send in questions for Auston and Amelia!

Word Count: 1,032

Masterlist

Waking up with a start I turn over in my bed to face Auston. He was sleeping soundly on his side facing me, his chest rising softly. Felix was laid at the end but had lifted up slightly so that he could look at me. I let out a soft breath as I turned to the bedside table to read the clock. 3:45am.

I glanced back at the door confused before hearing a loud bang ring throughout the silent apartment. Felix sat up more as he turned his attention to the door. He let out a quiet bark as sat up.

“Auston,” I whispered reaching out to shake his arm.

“Aus wake up,” I repeated louder giving him another rough shake. His sleepy eyes peaked open as he came to his surroundings.

“Amelia?” he questioned closing his eyes and reaching his arms out to pull me against him. Another loud noise sounded throughout the apartment causing Auston to jump into a sitting position.

“Who was that?” he asked, sending me a confused look. I gave him an annoyed look as I shook my head.

“Why would I know that?” I asked pulling the blanket up so that it would cover my naked body.  We had ended up having sex when we got back from the bar and we seemed to have fallen asleep without getting dressed.

“Did we let anyone sleep over?” he questioned rubbing his eyes before reaching for his shirt that was at the end of the bed. I shook my head no as he climbed out of the bed. He grabbed a pair of boxers before making his way back over to me with another t-shirt.

“Put that on I’m going to see who’s here,” he told me as he threw the shirt at me.

“Wait what if it’s like an axe murderer,” I said worriedly as I pulled the shirt on. Auston turned to look at me with a smirk on his face.

“Babe you’ve been watching way too many Forensic Files,” Auston said through a laugh. He reached for the door but I hopped out of bed slipping in between him and the door.

“I’m serious Auston. It’s 3:45am who on earth could that be?” I questioned pushing my hand to his chest. He stared down at me for a moment, his eyebrows creased.

“Shh,” he shushed me before leaning down to press a kiss to my temple. I heard the sound of a cabinet loudly closing causing the two of us to jump again.

“C’mon Felix,” Auston called out as he opened the door. Felix took off out the door to the kitchen. He let out a loud bark before we heard the sound of someone saying shit. Auston quickly made his way out, me following hot on his trail.

“Fred? Will?” Auston asked confused as he made his way into the kitchen. The two were standing near the microwave, which was running. They turned to look at us with a confused and slightly sheepishlook.

“Auston what are you doing here?” Freddie asked, looking him over.

“Dude this is my apartment,” Auston laughed out as he reached his hand up to run it through his hair. I hid myself behind his body feeling slightly exposed in only Auston’s long t-shirt and my underwear.

“What?” Fred asked, looking around before turning back to us.

“Oh my god how did we end up here?” he questioned turning to Willy. The microwave timer went off causing us all to jump.

“You had the key!” Willy said, throwing his arms up. Freddie reached up and pulled the popcorn bag out of the microwave before making his way over to the cabinet to pull out a bowl.

“What are you doing?” Auston asked Freddie.

“Hi Amelia,” Willy slurred as he gave me a sweet smile. I felt myself blush as I pulled my shirt lower down my body.

“Do you want some popcorn?” Freddie asked, holding the bag out between us.

“What no. Dude it's almost four am you need to go,” Auston told them as he shook his head.

“Can we at least take the popcorn?” Willy asked as he picked up the plastic bowl Freddie had poured the popcorn into. Auston let out a sigh before nodding his head.

“Yeah I’ll see you guys tomorrow at practice,” Auston said as he pushed them toward the door.

“Be gentle bro,” Willy whined as Auston continued to push them. The two said their goodbyes before making their way out of the apartment.

“Sorry about that,” Auston whispered as he walked over to me wrapping his arms around my shoulders in a tight hug. He pressed a kiss to my forehead as I relaxed into his hold.

“Freddie has a key to your apartment?” I questioned as I pulled away from his hold.

“Yeah I gave him one when he moved into the same building in case I ever got locked out of my apartment or if he needed to borrow something,” Auston said as he walked over to the kitchen counter where the empty bag of popcorn lay. He picked it up and threw it in the garbage before grabbing my hand and leading me back to his bedroom. Auston walked over to the bathroom while I climbed into the bed. Felix followed me quickly, taking Auston’s spot.

“No bud you need to move,” Auston told Felix when he went to climb into the bed. Felix stared at him as if he didn't understand him. When he finally got Felix to move Auston cuddled up to me from behind.

“Sorry about that babe,” Auston mumbled into my ear before pressing a gentle kiss to my neck.

“It’s okay you didn’t know,” I laughed lightly as I locked my hand with his hand that was wrapped around me.

“I can ask him for the key back,” Auston grunted as he moved around to get more comfortable.

“No, don't worry about it.” I let out a sigh as I leaned into Auston.

“Your teammates bring great comedy,” I laughed. He joined in as he let out a sigh of own.

“I guess they do.”

[nhlarchived]

Part One ~ Part Two ~ Part Three ~ Part Four

Word Count: 2.1k

Fic Type: Series

__________________________________________

You decided not to go out to the beach with everyone else. You weren’t in the mood. It was only two weeks ago you broke up with your boyfriend of two years. The worst part was, you didn’t break up because he cheated, or you got into an argument or anything like that. It was simply because he had moved out to Europe, which you weren’t able to do, and the long distance became intolerable. You tried your hardest to keep the relationship going but couldn’t. You only ended up hurting each other more.

Your best friend Sydney invited you out to her and Matt’s beach house out on the Jersey Shore. You figured it would be the perfect way to get your mind off of things. Besides, you were friends with Matt and all his old Toronto teammates as well, they decided to have one last get together before Matt runs off to New York, so it was a flawless recipe to happiness. The house could fit twelve which promised plenty of distractions from the argument going on in your mind anyway.

However, today the break up was really bothering you. You arrived at their house midafternoon yesterday. Everyone else was planning on arriving the next day so you were able to spend some time alone with Matt and Sydney that night. As wonderful as it was to hang out with your friends alone once more, it reminded you of your past relationship. No matter how much you tried to push it away, you envied the simple things like how they would look at each other or even the caring questions he would ask. You missed being cared for and you were hoping a good night's rest would fix it, but it didn’t.

Everyone else arrived early this morning. Not being able to hold in their excitement, before even unpacking, they all decided to take a quick run to the beach. You opted out due to feeling unwell, deciding to settle in the kitchen. You grabbed a drink from the fridge, resting your forearms on the marble topped island as you watched the waves accompanied by your group of friends busying themselves with either football, tanning, or boogie boarding.

You rested your head into your hand as you continued to watch. A light breeze cooled off the air in the house through the screen door and you closed your eyes with the peaceful sound of the water crashing, allowing the wind to gently blow your hair off your face. You took deep breaths to relax your body and intake the sweet salty aroma. It had been a while since the last time you were at the beach. It was your favorite place to go with your ex, so you tended not to go without him, but you were hoping this trip would change that mindset. However, you couldn’t seem to stop the memories replaying in your head of how much fun the two of you used to have. Almost as if a movie was playing in your mind.

“Is everything okay?” You heard a male voice from beside you. Your head fell off your hand and a loud gasp escaped your mouth. Your heart beat felt like it could be seen out of your chest and if it wasn’t for your arm resting on the marble, you probably would have fell over. At first you believed it was an intruder due to the fact everyone had left for the beach. However, you were theory was proven incorrect when you saw Matt’s ex teammate Auston grabbing a drink from the fridge behind you.

“Sorry I didn’t mean to scare you.” He said while trying to hide his giggle. He even left his head facing the inside of the fridge a little longer that way you wouldn’t see the giant amused smirk across his face.

You and Auston knew each other very well due to Syd and Matt. You were from NYC which is how you originally met them, but before Matt was even traded you took up your dream job in Toronto. Once he got traded it was effectively the best day of your life since they were both your best friends.

Auston and Mitch were the first two teammates Matt had introduced you to since they were practically inseparable. You and Auston hit it off immediately. It wasn’t even that you had a lot in common, your personalities just clicked. You became really close friends but due to your boyfriend, you've always kept some distance from Auston since he was very attractive, and you knew he thought the same of you. Everyone said the two of you had a thing for each other, but at the time Auston was with someone as well. So, you mutually decided to only to hang around friends and talk to each other sparsely in respect for your significant others.

There was no denying that there was a spark between you two that you had always ignored, but you figured it would never work out. Even now. Rumor has it Auston left his girl a couple months ago, and even though you’re single as well, you knew it would still take a while to rid your mind of your own ex. Besides, his lifestyle may not be ideal for your liking either. Considering your recent breakup was due to distance, this wouldn’t be much different.

“Other than the heart attack, yes, everything is fine.” You responded holding your hand to your chest. Auston turned around from the fridge, a huge smile still evident on his face revealing his flawless pearly whites. He still had some stubble growing around his mouth and his hair was wet, lying lazily over forehead. You bit your bottom lip in hopes of stopping the possible drool about to escape your mouth from his appearance as his newest addition to his tattoo sleeve peaked out from his T-shirt. God, you were such a sucker for tattoos.

“Somethings wrong why are you crying?” He questioned. You hadn’t noticed it but two tears had escaped your eyes while lost in a trance about you past relationship earlier. You didn’t want Auston to know that was the reasoning, so you quickly had to come up with an excuse.

“Probably because you just scared the hell out of me.” You teased. As you spoke you noticed your voice sounded slightly nasally due to congestion from crying. Before Auston responded he lifted his hand to rest on the side of your cheek. As a reaction you turned towards his body that was adjacent from yours now. He watched you cautiously as he wiped away the tears with his thumb. His eyes studied you carefully as you watched his sympathetic features above you.

“Who hurt you?” He asked, the muscles in his face tightening as he tries to solve his own question in his mind. His hand continued to rest on your cheek and you tried your hardest not to lean into him for comfort. His hand was so warm, and it sat perfectly on your cheek like a pillow. You wanted to give into him. Forget everything about your ex and finally move forth with Auston but it was too soon, and you were aware of that.

“No one Auston. Seriously, I’m fine.” You reassured. Moving your head away from his palm, turning to face out the window once again. Knowing that if you stayed there any longer, you would fall for his touch.

“Listen I may not be a fighter, but I’ll still beat someone’s ass for you.” He admitted. You couldn’t help but let out a breathy chuckle from not only the accusation, but also the thought of it. However, your giggle released another tear onto your cheek followed by a sniffle. You were in such a tough situation. The boy you’ve known and loved for years is now thousands of miles away, and the one who seemed to be your true pairing was standing right in front of you with arms wide open, but you couldn’t get your distractions out of the way. There was no way of hiding it now as you watched Auston stare at you concerned. You knew that it was time to face the truth. Maybe telling someone would help ease the pain.

“Jack and I broke up.” You whispered staring at the counter in front of you. Your lips folded into your mouth as you attempted to prevent a frown. Hoping it’ll keep more water works away from falling. Your hands were resting on the ledge of the island and Auston mimicked your moves adjacent from you.

“Why?” He asked sympathetically. You couldn’t pull yourself to look at him in his face, so you decided to only watch his hands.

“Distance.” Was your short response. You didn’t need to explain. Auston wasn’t foreign to your relationship. He knew the distance was always an issue between the two of you. Hell, you may have told him almost every issue your relationship had. But he also understood how much he meant to you.

“I’m sorry.” He apologized. As if he had anything to apologize over. But you knew he was trying to be nice and supportive.

“No need to be sorry. Let’s just hope it was for the better.” You responded in attempts to stay optimistic. Finally looking him in his eyes and flashing a sincere smile. Yet he watched you with a poker face. You couldn’t tell if it was sympathetic, happy, sad, mad. His emotions were lost as if he was in deep thought over something.

“What are you doing in the house anyway? I thought you went out with everyone.” You questioned in hopes of breaking the awkward silence but also wanting to know why he decided to stay back. His eyes blinked before responding, proving he was daydreaming.  

“I wanted to unpack first knowing I wouldn’t have if I went down there. I was about to head out but then I saw you.” He explained. He bent over the marble resting on his elbow facing you as his head leaned onto his hand indicating he wasn’t leaving until you did.

“Well don’t let me and my sobby attitude stop you.” You admitted lifting your hand to signal out towards your friends on the beach. He gazed out the window for a couple seconds watching them as he pondered what decision he was going to make.

“Come on.” He suggested standing up straight. He turned half his body towards the stairs that led to the exit while holding his hand out for you to take.

“No Aus, it’s fine really. I’m not much of a beach person anyway I just came to hang out with everyone.” You explained shaking your head back in forth to deny him. He was always one to include you in things. He thought everything was more fun with you around but at the moment you really wanted to be alone. Especially since confessing your break up didn’t exactly make you feel better.

“Who said we were going to the beach?” He inquired, opening and closing his palm to emphasize he wanted you to take it. Your head tilted in confusion.

“Didn’t you just say you were about to go out onto the beach until you saw me?” You inquired. Your sight was flicking between his hand and his face that was watching you enthusiastically. He had a plan. You didn’t know what it was, but you knew that expression he was giving.

“I changed my mind. I know somewhere better.” He said widening his eyes attempting to intrigue you. You wanted to. You wanted to so bad. You didn’t even know what was holding you back at this point. You’ve always wanted to get alone with him and now was your time.

“I can see you’re thinking about it too much. Just trust me. Please.” Auston spoke softly. He was right. You had no reason not to trust him either. You wanted a distraction, and this was the perfect one, so you finally pulled yourself together and placed your hand in his.

His face lit up in a large smile. He pulled your hand down to his side and intertwined your fingers to hold hands as he guided you out of the house. You weren’t expecting it, but you’d be lying if you said you didn’t like it. He pulled you quickly, clearly impatient about what he had in store and you couldn’t wait to find out.

____________________________________________

Author’s Note: Let me know if you would like a part two!