#the plot of this is absurd

[nero-neptune]

DETENTION | 2011 | dir. joseph kahn

[starcurtain]

I think Alhaitham's views on gods and his dynamic with Nahida in particular is probably one of the most underrated comedic elements to come out of Sumeru.

This guy put together an entire crack squad and master plan to rescue a god while being the Genshin equivalent of an atheist. "Yes, obviously archons exist. But so do sharks. Both of those beings have their place in the ecosystem, and if I had to pick one to piss off--"

Like, does he believe in the dendro archon? Yes. But is he going to listen if she denies his paid vacation request? Absolutely not.

Bro is selected by name to come discuss important matters with his nation's deity in her sanctuary, and he's just like, "Oh, I ran into Nilou there once. That was cool."

Raised to the highest possible position available in his nation's government by the deliberate selection of his god? Resigns.

We know that Nahida still calls on Alhaitham when Sumeru is in need of defending from nefarious parties, and sends him out with Wanderer to kick ass and take names. Now that they've forgotten Rukkhadevata and the Akademiya's ploy to imprison Nahida has been foiled, most of the people of Sumeru would be floored by the honor of being called upon personally to aid the great dendro archon. Staggered by the fact that the lord of wisdom herself finds them worthy! But Alhaitham? He just goes home. Kaveh asks him what he was up to all day. "Hm. Nothing of note."

Everyone else, upon receiving the recognition of a god: My life has been changed forever. I will be telling my great grandchildren of the day I received such a blessing!

But for Alhaitham? It was Tuesday.

Criminally underrated comedic potential. CRIMINAL.

[essektheylyss]

I do keep coming back to the thought that there is no reason to have stopped to see Astrid before going to Aeor if the point wasn't to try to recruit her for chaperone duties. It doesn't exactly seem like she's with the Vanguard or she wouldn't be hiding in a smut shop in Zadash.

Please, Astrid, come to Aeor with us. You can take potshots at your ex's new boyfriend the whole time. And he can't even say shit about it, because he's the one who invited you.

[heart-0f-a-rebel16]

see I think like the main problem with tcw is that it has this sitcom energy where everything is set back to zero after every arc which absolutely demolishes any sense of progression or character development

[mrfancyfoot]

I headcanon that Raphael is all about cheesy, romantic things (for better or worse). Being the visage of a perfect gentleman. Swooping in as the gallant, princely savior. Being chosen over other suitors.

He'd shower you in roses and gifts. He'd set up scenarios for himself to be the hero. He'd meticulously take note of little things he notices about you through direct interaction or spying to exploit later. Obsessively writing about you in his little diary from bed while giddily kicking his feet.

Those gifts might be finery (perhaps taken from some unfortunate soul), questionable poetry, and the heart of your enemy, but any way you cut it, everything is about showing off his prowess, his status, his ability to provide, and why he's better. He likes his complex games and the slow pursuit.

I think he'd be pretty devoted if only to maintain that image of being perfect. At least while his focus is on you. He might have some dumpster fires behind curtains, don't look there.

The mortal part of him may even crave true affection, devotion, and a coy, storybook courtship. Very much a "only soft for" vibe. That he can slowly corrupt. He'd love someone who could match a lot of his energy and ambition. Someone he can show off and have on his arm.

It could also explain why he (at least publicly) dresses more conservatively and akin to a human noble instead of like many other cambions and devils. While it probably helps disarm his targets to look more like a human noble when they first meet him, he could also enjoy the romantics it allows (he's into a lot of mortal things despite his denial of his own mortal blood). I have a related pet theory that his comfort with mortals/mortal things may come from being raised or forced to live in the Material Plane for at least a time. He really likes lullabies.

Would he be a good lover in bed? That is up to anyone's interpretation but I personally think it's likely that there isn't much love between him and Haarlep and not many probably match up to the standards of an experienced incubus (one of these days I'll go on my spiel about Haarlep). Haarlep's a cheeky devil themself. At the very least, Raphael probably thinks himself fantastic in bed and a perfectly giving lover (even if he's not).

He'd be the big, evil devil guarding the gilded cage he's put his beloved in from do-gooders and the covetous.

[overtake]

A random scene from my Maxiel hockey au just because

“Why the fuck does this team give us perfectly identical sweatshirts? How am I ever meant to find mine?” Daniel asks, pawing through the clothes piled precariously on one of the barstools.

“It’ll probably be the one with your number on it,” Max says drily. “And teams tend to have matching clothing.”

Daniel looks up from his careful searching and tosses Max the finger. “Just for that, I’m wearing yours.”

Max’s hoodie is technically the same size as Daniel’s because Daniel prefers to size up, but it’s stretched out around the shoulders in a way Daniel’s isn’t. There’s a small stain by the left cuff whereas Daniel keeps his pristine. Most notably, there’s a 33 over the left chest instead of a single digit. It feels more lived-in and comfortable than Daniel’s, even though Daniel probably wears his jumpers twice as often as Max does.

He pops his head of the neckline and adjusts the strings. “Alright. I’m set. Let’s go.”

Max is paused with his keys in hand, mouth slightly parted and eyes burning holes into the number screenprinted on the fabric.

“You can’t get mad. I told you I was taking it,” Daniel says, even though Max doesn’t seem upset. Daniel can’t quite identify the expression crossing his face, but it’s definitely not annoyance.

“Don’t spill anything on it,” Max finally says.

Daniel catches up to him at the door and sticks the stained arm in Max’s face. “Don’t worry. You took care of that first.”

Max shoves his arm away, rolling his eyes playfully. “I’m not driving you anymore. You can hobble to the rink.”

Daniel switches positions to wrap his upper body around Max’s broad back, clasp his hands around Max’s neck, and jerk one leg up as if he’s about to jump for a piggy-back ride. Max elbows him off, giggling and pink-cheeked.

“Fine, I suppose I can give you a ride, but I’m not buying your tea,” Max warns. He undercuts his threatening words by instinctively holding Daniel’s hip, pale fingers pressed into plush fabric and waiting in case Daniel’s ankle gives out. Daniel has been successfully walking with no problems for a full week now, but Max is always hovering and holding.

“But I’m cold,” Daniel pouts, dramatically sticking out his lower lip. He’s just being annoying, but a gust of chilly air actually hits as he says it. Daniel shivers, pulling the jumper tight over his hands and moving closer to Max to try and leech some of his body heat. “I need this. Respect those of us from hot countries who played in hot states for ages.”

Max laughs, slinging an arm around Daniel’s back and tugging him into a mocking hug. “Poor Daniel. You only have to play in the NHL for the most iconic team in the craziest hockey city. Your life is very hard because it’s sometimes below zero and I don’t buy you tea.”

Daniel pulls his hands upward and dramatically rubs them together, then huddles into Max and presses his clasped hands between their chests. He doesn’t care if the hug is teasing. He’s genuinely fucking cold.

“You’re not allowed to be mean to me. I’m still injured.” He pokes out his healed ankle and lightly kicks Max’s leg with it. Max is in shorts, exposing fuzzy, muscled calves to Canadian January because he’s batshit insane.

“I’m hugging you,” Max says, rubbing his free hand up and down Daniel’s back. “I am very nice.”

Daniel presses his face into Max’s shoulder, just for a second. “Yeah. You’re not too bad, I guess.”

Shortly into their drive, Max detours, parallel parks, and comes back with a massive tea and crinkly brown bag.

“Their tea is shit and the donut is vegan,” Max says. His furrowed brow is aiming for admonishing, but the tugged edges of his mouth and dramatic tone give him away. “That’s your punishment.”

He still accepts the torn pieces of donut Daniel presses to his pink mouth and licks off the crumbs that decorate the sweet freckle on his upper lip.

“Wait. You have —” Daniel covers his thumb with the blue fabric of Max’s sweater and wipes one last sprinkle away as Max pulls into a parking space.

Max catches Daniel’s wrist before he can pull it back to his own body. He stares Daniel down with big eyes and long lashes and plucks the sprinkle where it’s caught on the ribbed cuffs. Max places one hand on Daniel’s chin and pulls down his lower lip, then places the sprinkle into Daniel’s salivating mouth.

“Don’t waste food.”

Max’s hands linger for one heated second before he drops them to turn off the ignition. Daniel tries to calm the thud of his straining heart, breathing in then out in an attempt to regain some normalcy.

He takes long enough that Max knocks on his passenger-side window, peering in and making little glasses over his eyes and waving all goofy, like nothing had just happened.

He eventually pulls open Daniel’s car door for him, gesturing out to the grey pavement. “Are you planning on showing up to practice today?” he teases.

Daniel recovers enough to slide out, though not gracefully, and heads into the rink to get chirped into oblivion over the 33 that feels throbbing and alive over his still-racing heart.

[darkkbluee]

L for Minister AU

Light Yagami is desperate to know L's name and face. To know everything about his nemesis ("So I can kill him! Ryuk, stop laughing!"). And so, he turns on the TV, sees the promo video for the upcoming elections and thinks...

L would have to show up in person, unmasked and with his real name, if he was an elected Minister.

A few hours of paperwork filed anonymously and through a shady lawyer, a few hours of hacking and anonymous donations, and The Great Detective L is the latest minister candidate, running as an independent.

L does not know how or why he is suddenly running in the elections. Was this even legal? He wasn't even a citizen! Surely no one would vote for a candidate with no public appearances, a profile page with no photo, obviously overblown promises in propaganda -

Apparently, they would.

[eviltw1nk]

*putting my hands out like a starving victorian orphan* j-jewish falsettos scraps…?

[rotteneldritchhorror]

They gave Topper a girlfriend— devastating actually, I hope he stays fucking insane and obsessive and possessive and a little bitch cause otherwise what’s the poooiiinntttt

I need my kooks PATHETIC and USELESS. She better blow up on him for ignoring her to do whatever Rafe’s asking of him this time, I need him to be the worst boyfriend ever cause there’s no way that man can Be Normal for a second lol

[lucky-clover-gazette]

more volo in hyrule... welcome to a new game ost piano boy

[litmot-archived]

There was this idea I had about an Isaac Novella, and considering I am never going to write it, I thought I would share the very basic outline and half-baked thoughts I had for it:

For some reason I wanted to call it A Separate Peace

It would start with Isaac and Pickle -- post-canon -- taking on a case about two bothers who were looking for their parents. They had been separated from their parents since early childhood, and now that they were influential men or whatnot they had the means and connections to investigate what had happened back then.

I had some sort of conflict in mind for Isaac and Pickle. I wanted their relationship to be strained, them growing further apart during their research until Pickle would leave (for a while) and continue following up on one of their leads on their own while Isaac stayed in his mansion and spiralled into overwork and his unhealthy coping mechanisms.

Asirel would keep close watch on the case for his own reasons. The parents of the two brothers would turn out to be scientists who ran experiments on mythics, being the ones who had developed the serum that could knock out pet. Some rivalling organisation (the Trimedian perhaps) had found out about this and wanted their research for themselves, forcing them into hiding and leaving them to abandon their children for their own protection.

Asirel would constantly sabotage the investigation, trying to keep Isaac and Pickle away from finding the parents by giving them other cases, giving them false leads and so on. Eventually they would figure out that the parents were scientists, experimenting on mythics etc. and one of the leads would guide them out of the country, but before they could leave Asirel would call Isaac and straight out tell him to drop the case, that it was out of his range, that he was touching some top-secret thing that was above his pay grade.

It would end with Isaac and Pickle actually listening to Asirel, fabricating some story and fitting evidence to deceive the brothers and keep the secrets they had uncovered, like Asirel told them to.

[ask2ps]

2P! LIECHTENSTEIN AND SWITZERLAND! (Feat. a heavily altered screencap redraw.)

Info about my interpretation of them under the cut!

The two representatives are inseparably close, and have adopted the human relationship status of "siblings." Just as the nations share an open border, the representatives themselves share a home.

VOSS ZWINGLI: The representative for Switzerland. He views the world as a truly dark place, where the best way to keep yourself safe is to simply not participate. Hence, despite his outwardly-courteous people-pleaser nature, he internally wants nothing more than to isolate himself from his vile, power-hungry neighbors. He makes a fair effort to better the world, working with charity and medical institutions across the globe, but it's caused him to grow even more hopelessly paranoid about contamination, sabotage, and war. His main solace is his younger sister Elise, who is often the only person willing to patiently endure his anxiety and absurd "precautionary measures." Of the whole rotten world, nations and humans like, Elise might be the only one he thinks highly of. Even if he wishes she'd be a little less reckless.

ELISE VOGEL: After a lifesaving intervention, Liechtenstein promised Switzerland a life debt, despite his protests. Unfortunately for her, Switzerland (as a nation) is notoriously neutral, and Voss (as a representative) is generally isolated and unimposing, so she doesn't have much to do. So until the fateful day comes where she will repay her life debt, she has taken the role of a little sister, doing her best to ease her brother's concerns, help him with his work, and protect him from... well, whatever she can get her hands on, really. Her scrappiness and somewhat accusatory tone tends to land her in hot water with others, though. This behavior likely stems from the fact that she never left the "verge-of-life-and-death" state of mind. She's terrified of any slip-ups leading to her dissolution: after all, that would leave her as nothing more than a waste of Voss' time and effort.

[fruitlicense]

having watched the show and nearly finished the books, imo the plot of The Witcher hinges way more than you think on the fact that Geralt, Yennnefer, and Jaskier/Dandelion all have a deep personal need to be the most fuckable person in town, but Geralt will never admit it out loud

[fictionadventurer]

Flipping through the channels, I see a priest on a detective show.

"I'll bet someone confessed to the murder, but they can't tell anyone because of the seal of confession," I said.

Guess what, guys?

Someone confessed to the murder and the priest couldn't tell anyone because of the seal of confession.

[morethanjustsomebutterflies]

I was gonna color this and I might still later, but just throwing this out there now

[deeplovelydark]

a clear case of male characters' writing suffering badly because of heterosexism and misogyny is quark & julian & worf's interactions. they are very limited and out of those, many (if not most, but I'm not certain enough to make that statement) revolve around them pining for, competing for and being jealous of each other over dax. it's so fucking boring. dare I say... men's relationships with each other shouldn't revolve around women they're chasing after... it reduces the woman to an object of a man's affection and the men to drones dutifully carrying out their preordained purpose: to win themselves a mate.