#the screaming at the computer bc no one is telling them what to do and u just gotta watch.....

[bastardbvby]

watching this phoenix play is the equivalent of how i felt watching early valotina streams but . u know what she’s experienced growth i love it

[samandcolbyownme]

i forgot to reupload this - enjoy again!

Summary: Anon request - "Heey, i hope u're good and i hope u're accepting requests. I'm in love with ur works and i was wondering if u could write a very smutty piece about Sam and the reader being best friends (she's living with snc, bc they've been best friends all their lives). Maybe lately both Sam and the reader start noticing each other a lot more than before, like y/n is studying one night and Sam comes back from his run, they have a late night snack and it's all blushy and cute. But the upcoming days there's a lot of sexual tension between them until Sam just decides to put an end to their friendship to become more. I hope it's ok ♥️" 

Warnings: SMUT18+, strong language, unprotected sex, angst, hair pulling, choking, scratching, oral (f rec), fluff with filth 

Word Count: 5.7k | Not Edited Yet 

─── ⋆⋅ ☾⋅⋆ ───

You sat on the couch, lap top on your lap as you typed up your paper for school. It was quiet since Sam and Colby went out to meet someone about a possible exploration, so you put your headphones on to drown out the silence. 

You were too zoned out on getting this thing written that you completely missed the text Sam sent which stated that they would be home soon. 

After ten more minutes of typing, you close your lap top and stand up, letting out a scream as they laugh, "Honey, we're home." Colby says with a laugh and you sigh, "I see that." 

Sam smiles at you, and you hated when he did that, mainly because it made you fall more in love with him, and you couldn't do that.

You guys were best friends. 

Emphasis on the friend's part. You knew them, pretty much your whole life, and even though they haven't ever really said it, you knew that it would even be weird to talk about it, or so you thought. 

"How was the meeting thing?" You ask as they walk over towards you. Sam shrugs, "They're going to let us in, it's just a matter of finding out when exactly." He plops down onto the couch, "Get that paper done?" 

You sit back down, opening your computer back up, "Almost. I need like two more paragraphs." 

"What's it on again?" Colby asks turning your computer towards him, "Geoengineering technology? You are way too smart for your own good." 

You laugh and you can see Sam staring at you lovingly but you don't want to get your hopes up, "Yeah, sometimes I wonder if that's why I get headaches, too much knowledge up here." 

Colby laughs, "You know you don't have to go to school right? You can just fully commit to joining the xplr squad." 

You roll your eyes, "We've been friends for how many years? I've been a part of that squad before it was even thought of." 

Sam laughs as Colby nods while laughing, "You got me there. I'll give you that one." You smirk and look over at Sam, "Did you beat your time this morning? I wanted to ask but I had to leave before you got back." 

Sam sighs, "yes and no. I did but not by much, so.." 

"You'll get there. You have plenty of time." You smile at him and stand up, "I have an evening class tonight so I'll see you guys after five or so." You walk up to change, and right before you enter your room, Colby speaks, but it's not as quiet as he thinks, "You gotta tell her, bro."

You perk up, curious as to what they're talking about. 

"There's no way. No, Colby. I can't just spring that on her." Sam argues back and his voice goes quiet, making it hard for you to hear. 

You shake the thoughts out of your head and continue in to get dressed. You throw on a pair of jeans, sneakers, and one of the new hoodies from Sam's collection.

You grab your backpack and head back downstairs, "I'll see you guys later, do you want me to grab dinner on my way back?" 

"Yeah, that'll be good." Colby looks at you and nods, "Get whatever, you know what we get." You smile and nod, "Okay." 

Your eyes meet Sam's and he smiles at you. He loved seeing you in his own merch. You are his favorite model, but you didn't know that, for sure. 

Sam's eyes stay on you as he watches you search for your keys,"by the microwave, y/n." You look over and lo and behold they're there, "Thank you!" 

He yells out a quick, "Welcome!" as you leave the house. You make your way to your car, the thoughts running rabid through your mind, 

He's got a girlfriend and he's going to ask me to move out because he knows I like him and it's weird. 

You get in, sitting there for a moment before starting your car and driving to campus. 

.·:*¨ ✘ ¨*:·.

"It's not weird at all." Your friend Lacey says leaning back in her chair, "You've been friends for a while, and I always say the friendship stage is the most important thing before dating someone. And you my friend, have it perfect." 

You sigh, "But the way they were talking I just... I feel like he's going to tell me he is talking to someone and he knows I like him and- Gahhhh." You groan quietly and take a deep breath as she leans over, "I've witnessed you and Sam together in a room full of people, and I can tell you that he doesn't look at anybody the way he looks at you." 

"Really?" You ask, her words giving you a little bit of hope and she nods, "Really. And just a little f.y.i, best friends don't look at each other the way you and Sam do." 

You smile slightly as you think about what she said, "I just don't know how to tell him, like.. my anxiety about the friendship ending gets the best of me because I don't want to lose him, and I know him and Colby are a package deal, so I'd lose them both and it just-" 

"Take a breather. Why don't you talk to Colby about it? I'm sure he knows a lot of their end." 

You shake your head, "I couldn't do that. I feel like Sam is the one I need to talk to or not at all.. I just.. I just have to get over myself." 

As your professor starts talking, you keep thinking about everything, but little did you know, Sam and Colby weren't editing videos like you thought, they were having almost the same conversation you and Lacey were having. 

Growing up, the adults would pick on you and Sam for claiming to be just friends, and for a while there, it was really true, but as you got older, the truth was covered up.

Each video you have done with them, the fans have pointed out things about you and Sam. Some would be simple comments, basically what Lacey said, about how you look at each other.

Then others would be making a big deal out of you picking to run to Sam after something scared you during the investigation. Most of the time it's because Sam is right there, you'd run to Colby too if you needed to, but who are you kidding, Sam is your safe place so of course you'll run to him first. 

You never commented back to it, because that would just lead to more confusing things, so you just brush it off most of the time. You've never say anything to Sam about it because you know more than likely already seen them, and if he hasn't said anything, why should you? 

.·:*¨ ✘ ¨*:·.

You pull your phone out as you walk to your car, texting the group chat, I'm just going to go somewhere close, I have to study for a stupid test tomorrow and I don't want to be up all night. 

You toss your backpack into the passenger seat and get in, reading Colby's reply, that's fine 

Sam replies after, whatever is easiest for you.

You set your phone down and start driving, going where you need to go before heading home. 

You see someone walking towards your car which makes you kind of skeptical about getting out. You reach up to lock your doors until you see the big X on the front of it, letting out a sigh of relief. 

You push open your door and lean your head out, "Don't scare me like that." 

"Like what?" Sam asks as he pushes his hood down, giving you a smile. You get out and stand up, "Walking towards my car when it's almost dark out with your hood up." 

"Oh, yeah. Sorry. I just threw it on, I figured you'd need help carrying stuff in." He takes your backpack from your hands and slings it over his shoulder, "Anything else?"

You shake your head, "No I can get the rest. Thank you." 

He nods, smiling at you for a few seconds before cleaning his throat, "Colby is hungry so we should probably get back in there."

"Of course he is." You laugh, grabbing everything else before walking inside with Sam. You wanted to blurt it out on your way up to the house, but it was like you couldn't speak at all. 

"Finally." Colby teases as you walk in through the door that Sam held open for you, "Thanks." You mumble quietly, going back to normal volume when talking to Colby, "There was a line, I'm sorry." 

He laughs as he points to you, "Don't let it happened again." 

You salute him, "Yes sir, Colby sir." 

"Yeah that's right." He laughs, making you laugh and Sam smiles as he enjoys how comical you and Colby are. 

After dinner, you find yourself on the floor of the living room with your books spread out across the rug, "I'm so screwed." You mumble to yourself, "I should know this." 

"Have trouble there Einstein?" Sam asks as he walks over to the couch and sits down. You look up at him and nod, "This stupid surprise test, that actually isn't a stupid surprise because I knew about it, I just forgot.." you laugh slightly, "Will be the death of me." 

"Just relax, don't overdo it. When was the last time you took a break?" 

Him being so caring makes it harder, no one has ever cared about you the way Sam does, "dinner."

"Y/n that was two hours ago." Sam laughs slightly and sighs, "Take a break, go shower or something. Reset and come back." 

You push yourself off of the floor and sit, "Maybe you're the one who's too smart for their own good." You stand up, stretching and Sam can't help but notice your shirt ride up your stomach a little bit. 

He shakes his head as his voice is low, "If that was the case then.." he trails off as Colby comes down the steps, "you're having a party and didn't invite me?" 

"Yeah, you can help me study. We'll call it a study buddy party." You laugh as Colby stands right back up after sitting down, "No thanks. I'm out." 

You laugh and toss your pen down, "I'm going for a shower anyway. I need a break." You hike it up the stairs and when you look back, Sam looks away from you quickly.

You look away smiling and make your way to the bathroom. 

After a while of being upstairs, finding things to do to avoid going backstairs to your books, you sit down on your bed and lay back. 

You think about what you want to say to Sam, or more of what you need to say. 

You decide you're going to talk to him. Right now. You get up, and walk down the steps to find Colby sitting alone on the couch. 

"Where's Sam?" You look around as you walk over to Colby. He looks up at you, "Said he was going for a run." 

You look at the clock, "it's almost ten pm?" You furrow your brows, Sam usually never goes on late night runs like this, "Is he okay?" 

A smirk grows on Colby's face and you point, "No. no. Don't even." 

He holds his hands up, "My lips are sealed." You roll your eyes and look at your books, hoping to change the subject, "Can you just help me study for a little bit?" 

He sighs and sits up, "Fine." 

An hour goes by and Colby went up to work on some editing, leaving you alone in the kitchen as you worked on making yourself a snack. 

You whispered questions to yourself, answering them, then celebrating when you got the right answer. 

You hear the door open and Sam walks in, freezing slightly as he wasn't expecting you to be up, "Oh, hey." 

"Hey." You smile and turn back towards your book, "How was the run?" 

He shuts the door, shrugging as he sets his phone and headphones on the counter, "Not what I expected really." 

"You want to talk about it?" You go back to putting peanut butter on your banana slices and he walks over, looking over your shoulder as he reaches around and takes one, "i don't know how to talk about it." 

You nod slowly, "I know that feeling." 

He leans against the counter, "We've been friends for a while, y/n." 

You glance over at him, a small smile resting on your lips, "Longer than a while, Sam." He chuckles and nods, "a lot longer than a while." 

You set your knife down, licking your lips as you work your the courage to ask what you want to ask most. 

"What's going on in that head of yours?" Sam asks, reading you like an open book, "You can always talk to me. Or Colby. You know we both care so much about-"

"Do you have a girlfriend?" 

He's taken aback slightly, "What?" He laughs and shakes his head, "No, no. I don't." He looks up at you, crossing his arms, "What makes you think that I have a girlfriend?" 

You turn towards him slightly, "When I went up to get ready before my class.. I heard Colby tell you that you have to tell her, and I didn't.." you trail off, sighing as you close your eyes, "Nevermind." 

Sam stares at you for a few seconds, "Oh.." he chuckles, "That.. yeah no.. that was about a girl who I've been talking to.." he follows up quickly, "..but not in the way you think." 

You nod, your heart sinking slightly, "Ah, I see." 

"Yeah, I have to tell her that I'm not interested in her." Sam tilts his head towards you, "She hasn't gotten the hint yet, and I don't want to be douche about it." 

"Yeah, no of course not." You smirk slightly, "You're only mean to me." He laughs, "Well yeah, but you know what they say.." He sighs and leans over, taking another banana slice, "if a boy picks on a girl?" 

You try to fight a smile, but you fail so you look down, "I've heard that saying before." 

"Then you can probably put two and two together." He smiles at you as you look up at him, "I'm going to bed, we have to meet someone in the morning about the exploration." 

"Maybe don't be up so late."

"Could say the same to you." He winks and jogs up the steps, leaving you to ask yourself, does Sam like me back?

.·:*¨ ✘ ¨*:·.

Over the next few days, the energy between you and Sam was different. 

You felt drawn to him. 

And he felt drawn to you. 

You looked at him with so much love, and lust. You needed Sam, now. It felt like you were aching for him, but after the kinda, yet not-so cryptic conversation you had with him the one night, you just weren't sure what was in store for you and Sam. 

You've been flirty, almost feeling like you and Sam were closer. You would pass each other and his hand would land somewhere on your body, usually your lower back, and it would send a shock up your spine. 

"Morning." You say walking down the steps, "How'd your investigation go?" 

"Sam, why don't you show her the footage?" Colby says nudging Sam's arm. He takes a deep breath, "I don't think.." 

"You're coming back with us tomorrow night. That's all I'm saying." Colby holds his hands up, shaking his head and you look at Sam, pointing to Colby, "What's he talking about?" 

He licks his lips and sighs with a smirk, "Come on. I'll show you." You nod, following him back up the stairs, "Did it go good?" 

You follow him into his room and sit on his bed as he sits in the chair infront of his computer, "It was a loving spirit, basically, so yeah, it went good." 

You lean forward slightly, eyes on Sam as he clicks on things. A shy smile grows on his face, "I know you're not looking at the computer." 

He slowly turns his head towards you and you keep your eyes on him, "So what if I wasn't?" He cocks his jaw to the right as he smirks, "Never said it was a bad thing." He nods towards the computer, "Come here." 

You stand up, moving over to stand next to him. You press your hand on the desk and lean down slightly, watching as he presses play. 

You can tell he's watching you, but he's waiting for your reaction. 

"Can you repeat that for us please?" Sam asks on the video. After a few moments, you hear your name, clear as day and it wasn't from either one of the guys, "What the hell?" 

You look at Sam and he holds his hand up, "Just wait." 

You look back at the screen, "Something moved in that doorway." You lay your finger on the screen and Sam leans forward, "What? No way." 

"Rewind it... yeah.. there stop." You glance at Sam and nod towards the screen, "Now watch." He presses play, eyes on the screen and he leans back, eyes wide, "How did we miss that?" 

You laugh slightly, "I don't know."

He watches in shock, "Why don't you ever come with us anymore?" 

You hoped this question wouldn't ever be asked. 

"School, you know that Sam." You look at him quickly before reaching for the mouse to hit play, but he stops you, "That's the fake, I don't want to talk about it reason. Tell me the real reason." 

You stand up, letting out a quiet sigh, "I just didn't want to get in the way." He tilts his head, "In the way of what?" 

You shrug, unsure of what to say. 

"Is it the comments? About us, and what people think we are?" Sam crosses his arms and looks up at you. You laugh nervously, giving him a nod, "I guess so." 

He chews on his lip, "Uh huh." He smirks and leans forward, "Well they'll have a hay day with this." He clicks play and pulls you to sit on his thigh. 

You lean forward, listening to Colby speak on the video, "What does y/n have to do with this?" 

".. Sam .. it's time .." 

You furrow your brows, continuing to listen to the video, 

"Sam.. Sam.." you see Colby grab Sam's arm and Sam looks terrified, "Colby.." 

"Sam.. she's a good spirit.. she's made it known she doesn't want to hurt anyone." Colby assures him, "you think she's telling you that you need to tell her?" 

"Tell who what?" Sam shoots back and you look back at him. He's resting his chin on the palm of his hand and you look back at the screen. 

"Y/n.. tell y/n that you like her more than you're letting on, man." Colby's voice is low, almost like they tried to keep it a secret but forgot the camera was rolling? 

"Yeah, yeah. You're probably right, Colby.. I just.. how do they know that?" Sam is confused, "I just don't.. oh my god.."

"... together..." 

"Should y/n and Sam be together?" Colby asks, "If you say yes, make that little light go off for us." Instant light and Sam pauses the video, "Lady Zeroni was known as a match maker back in her day but it turned deadly when a man who wasn't happy with the person she chose for him came back and went on a total murderous rampage throughout the entire house." 

You lean back slightly, "So what you're saying is..." you laugh slightly and rest your hand on the top of his chair, "A ghostly matchmaker is saying we should.. what? Be together?" 

Sam stares up at you, "The whole time, I kept thinking about you. Here alone. Like we don't know what we deal with sometimes and when your name is said, my immediate thought was you in danger and I just.." 

You listen as he trails off, "When I asked about you having a girlfriend, I was scared you were going to ask me to move out because of how I feel about you." 

"Wait.. how do you feel about me?" He tilts his head and tries not to smile and you laugh, putting your hand over his face, "Shut up." 

He takes your hand off his face and holds it gently in yours, playing with the ring that's on your middle finger, "I'm scared as hell to want you.." his voice is quiet, "But here I am.." he looks up at you, "..wanting you anyway." 

You look up at him quickly and your eyes meet his, "I know that feeling, too." He smirks slightly, letting out a breath of air, "We've been friends for a wh-" he stops himself, smiling as he corrects his words, "We've been friends for our whole lives basically, and I just.." 

"Don't want to ruin the friendship?" 

He nods, "Exactly." 

You nod, "Since we're being honest.. I don't know when it happened, but all I know is that you're the first person I run to when I'm scared, happy, sad, anything." You tilt your head, "I mean, when we're doing a video, I run to Colby too, but mainly because he's close, but everything is just.. it's just very different with you." 

"You look at me way different than you look at Colby, I know that for a fact. Actually, Colby was the one who brought it to my attention and I honestly tried pushing it off because I wasn't sure if it was too weird.. like we've known each other for so, so long and we've reached that max level of comfortability with each other... it's just.." 

"It's a real amazing thing, Sam. Not many people, or should I say, many people would kill to have the type of relationship we have." You run your hand through his hair, and he closes his eyes, "Lacey told me that best friends don't look at each other the way we do." 

His eyes flutter open and he smiles, "Colby told me the same thing." 

"And I read the comments on our videos, and I just didn't want you guys to stop getting views or have your name being drug through the mud because we were being too touchy with each other." 

He pulls you closer, "Your safety is my number one priority during those and if me keeping an arm around you while we're in some sketchy ass haunted house makes you feel secure, then I'm going to do it." 

You smile, laying a hand on his chest, "I may have overthought a lot of it." 

He nods, "Oh me too, one hundred percent." 

He runs his bottom lip under his teeth, "I've been waiting years to do this." He slides his hand up, pulling you in so he can press his lips gently to yours. 

Your hand moves to his cheek as you deepen the kiss and he pulls back, scanning over your face as a smile forms on his lips, "Now that I think about it, we'd make a great couple." 

You tilt your head and scrunch up your nose, "You think so?" He pulls you in to kiss you, mumbling against your lips, "Know so." 

You hum against his, "You know what else?" 

"Hmm?" He tilts his head back to rest against his chair, looking up at you as he waits for you to tell him. 

You stand up, his hands still on your hips, "We know everything but one thing about each other."

He raises an eyebrow, "Oh yeah? What's that?" 

You slide your hands to his, "Come on." He stands up, following you over to his bed, instantly picking up what you're laying down for him, "Mm. Are you sure?" 

You turn around, slipping off your sweatshirt, "You have no idea how long I've thought about getting you into bed, Golbach." 

He chuckles as he slips his own shirt off, "I think I have an idea, y/l/n." His hands lay on your hips and he gently sits you down on the bed. 

You lay back as his body moves over top of yours, his hips resting perfectly between your knees. It's like you were made for each other. 

"Tell me what you want, babe." Sam's voice is low as he moves to kiss down your neck, "I'm all yours now." 

You felt a wave of calmness wash over you before you take his hand and slide it to your throat, "Prove it." 

He smirks with a slight hesitation before slowly tightening his grip, "As you wish." His lips crash into yours, kissing every once of skin he can as he makes his way down to the top of your sweats. 

He bites your waist band, looking up at you as he lets them snap against your skin with a smirk following the release, "Can I take these off?" 

"You don't have to ask." You go to sit up and take them off, but he presses a hand flat to your chest, "Let me, do it baby." 

You bite your lip, nodding as you lay back down. 

His hands slide up your clothed thighs, squeezing them before slipping his fingers between the band and your skin, "I want to take my time with this." 

You needed him now, but you understood. 

"Okay, baby." You whisper and smile down at him, lifting your hips as he tugs your sweats down. His lips part slightly, leaning little open kisses up your legs.

He moves back up, hovering over you he grinds against you, "You have no idea how many times I've thought about you.." he leans down and kisses you, "Thought about you." 

You smile, "I relate."

He kisses down your neck, "When you came down wearing one of my hoodies, I wanted to make you so late for class." 

"Would have been worth it." 

He smiles and brushes hair from your face, "Fuck, why'd we wait so long?" You shrug, "Good things take time, Sam." 

He smiles and looks from your lips to your eyes before leaning down to kiss you. He rolls over and you follow, straddling him as your lips reconnect with his. You grind down on him, low moans escaping the seal of your lips on one another.

"Please." You whimper out, "I need you." 

Sam grips your neck, squeezing slowly, "Say it again." 

Your lips form into a smile, and you whimper. "I need you."

He sits up, wrapping his arm around your back, "You're so fucking beautiful." His lips press to yours, moving slowly as he uses his arm to make your body move. 

You wrap your arm around his neck and grind down, moaning his name quietly. He leans back, "lay down for me." 

You move and lay on your back, watching as Sam strips the rest of his clothes off, "Take them off for me." He nods towards your panties that are still on your body and you comply by taking them off and kicking them off the bed. 

"You know, I've also thought about being between those legs.." he gets on his knees, moving towards the middle of the bed by your feet, "multiple times actually.. I was so close to pulling you into the bathroom at that party we went to last week and getting on my knees for you.." his eyes move up your naked body with a smirk, "You looked so fucking good." 

Your heart skips a beat, remembering that, even in your drunken state at the time, Sam wouldn't stop looking at you. 

"You should have." You whisper watching as he kisses up your legs, alternating sides with each kiss, "I wouldn't have minded." 

"Trust me, the next party we go to, I'll make it happen." He winks before dipping his head down and taking your clit between his lips. You let out a gasp, laying a hand on the back of his head, "Sam!" 

Your fingers tangle in his hair, pulling slightly as you arch your back, "Oh god, yes." You moan as you grind your hips against his face, whining out how good it feels. 

His tongue sinks into you and you pull his hair, causing him to groan against you. Your other hand searches for something else to grab for leverage. 

His hand throws your leg over his shoulder and your heel instantly digs in to pull him closer, "Fuck, Sam. Sam. I'm so close."

His fingertips dig into your skin, pinning you down as his tongue works its magic inside of you. 

Your eyes roll back and your back lifts up off the bed as he brings you to orgasm, "Shit shit shit." You moan out, "Fuck." 

He pulls away, immediately coming up to kiss you. His cock rubs against your pussy and you reach down, rubbing it up and down your soaked slit a few times before he pushes his hips forward, his cock slipping inside of you for the very first time. 

You both moan, clinging to each other in anyway you can. 

He slowly pulls out and slowly slides back in, taking in the feeling of you, "Fuck, you feel so good." 

"S-Sam.." you press your chest to his, "Fuck me. Please." 

He smirks and tilts his head, watching your face twist with the best pleasure you've ever received, "Fuck, yes." Your nails dig and drag up his back, "I love you." 

Sam leans up, stopping his thrusts as he looks at you. Your face goes shocked, "I-I don't know where that ca-" 

"He smiles and leans down to kiss you, "I love you more than words can say." 

"Then show me." You say quickly before you press your lips to his, "and you don't have to be gentle with me anymore, Sam." 

He smirks and shakes his head, "You're fucking perfect." His lips crash into yours and he pushes his hips all the way into you, moaning lowly against you. 

He slides a hand down your body and hooks his arm under your knee. He pulls it up and the new angle causes you to gasp, "Fuck."

He starts out thrusting slow, but quickly builds up to a faster, punishing pace. He tilts his head back, moaning before looking down at you. 

He sits up slightly and reaches his hand down to cup your chin. His thumb slides across your bottom lip and you part them instantly. 

He watches as you take his thumb between your lips, hallowing out your cheeks as you suck. He groans lowly, "I'm never going to get tired of you in this position."

You smile, teeth gently biting down on his thumb and he takes a sharp breath, "Oh yeah. Never getting tired of you in general." 

He pulls his hand away and lays beside you. You automatically roll over, straddling him to ride him. You tilt your head back with a moan as his cock slides back inside of you. 

His hands immediately grip your hips and help guide you up and down, "Fuck." His eyes are glued to his cock disappearing inside of you, "Doing so good, baby." 

Your eyes light up at the praise and he raises his eyebrows, "Like a little praise do we?" He pulls his bottom lip between his teeth, "You're full of surprises aren't you?" 

"You have no idea, Mr. Golbach." 

He sits up slightly, "But I will." 

He bends his legs up and your hands press to his knees as you bounce up and down, "Gonna cum." You whimper out as you slide all the way down and roll your hips, cursing out as you cum.

Sam is in awe of you, his eyes are moving all over your face, your body, "That's it, baby. Good girl." 

Your eyes snap open and you lean down, kissing him as you move your hips up and down, "Only for you." 

"Say.. say it again." He drags his fingers up your leg, "Please." 

"A good girl, but only for you." 

He flips you so you're back to being on your back and he's on top, thrusting into you, "Fucking right." 

You smile, moaning out as you wrap your legs around his waist, "Fuck, fuck yes." 

"M'so close." He mumbles into your neck, "Fuck. You're so good to me." 

His thrusts slow down and turn kinda sloppy as he gets ready to break the grasp of your legs locked around him. 

He pulls out to cum on your stomach and you lay there breathing heavy. He lays beside you, kissing your shoulder for a few seconds before standing up to grab you something to wipe off with. 

He comes back, hanging you a towel with a smile. You take it from him and smirk, "What?" 

"You're my girlfriend." He smiles and bites his lip, quietly celebrating. You tilt your head, "And you're my boyfriend." You smile at him and wipe up, tossing the towel on the floor before being met with a Sam laying his body over yours, "Should we go break the news to Colby?" 

You sigh, "I can picture his celebration dance already." 

Sam peppers kisses all over your face, getting you to laugh, "You're so cheesy." You turn your head, pecking his lips, "One of my favorite things about you."

He smiles and tucks your hair behind your ear, "You.. are my favorite thing about me." 

─── ⋆⋅ ☾⋅⋆ ───

Thanks for reading! I love you all so much! 🖤

Likes and reblogs are majorly appreciated!

[fairyhaos]

✰ seventeen as boyfriends: wonwoo edition

event taglist (send ask to be added): @rubywonu @cinnamoroxie @belladaises @wheeboo @minhui896 @slytherinshua @kokoiinuts @jun-of-love @dandycharmer @sweet-like-caramel @hannyoontify @doesthismeannothingtoyou @fashionminghao

pairing: wonwoo x gn!reader

genre: fluff, headcanon, mini scenario

word count: 533 (it was SO HARD to get this into the 500s)

warnings: mingyu's called an ass in passing

notes: wonwoo edn. for the 500 event

with wonwoo, it's all about those small, quiet moments together. 

sitting on the couch and dozing on his shoulder while he's reading, laying sprawled on his bed as he sits at his computer making eye contact and smiling while seungkwan sits opposite you and talks your heads off

it's the small moments of attentiveness, of loving you a little more than others, of him crying with laughter bc of mingyu then smiling at you so sweetly and only for you.

he’s not screaming it from the mountains, but he’s loving you privately, softly, genuinely.

randomly taps you on the shoulder and presses his lips to yours, shrugging and just smiling when you ask him what that was for

gets you gifts completely out of the blue, just because he wanted to treat you

when you tease him, going all “oooh you must like me a lot huh?” he just grins and kisses you, saying yes of course and he’s always liked you a lot, wasn’t it obvious? <3

“Jeez… some of these are, like, two days away from their best-before date,” you say, holding the cans up so he can see. “Shouldn’t these be on sale or something? There’s no way I’d pay full price for this.”

You’re walking down the aisles in the store, shopping with Wonwoo, peering at the shelves as if you’re suspicious of them. Wonwoo pushes the shopping cart behind you, chuckling. He takes them from you and puts them back, nudging you with the cart to move along. “Good thing we don’t need any canned mushy peas then,” he says, and you scrunch your nose.

“Ugh, too true. Why anyone would buy canned mushy peas is beyond me.” You carry on walking. “Have we finished shopping yet?”

“Mingyu wants me to get him shampoo again, so we need to buy that,” Wonwoo says, and you roll your eyes in fake exasperation.

“Mingyu needs to buy his own stuff,” you say, but you’re already holding onto the cart and pulling Wonwoo towards the aisle where the shampoo is. “Tell his lazy ass that this is the last time we’re doing this for him.”

Wonwoo laughs, letting you drag him and the cart. “I’ll tell him you said that exactly.”

You grin back. “Good.”

As you browse the shelves, contemplating between the price options for Mingyu (you’re leaning towards the cheap ones) Wonwoo calls out to you, leaning against the handle of the cart.

“Y/N?”

“Hm?”

“Have you ever thought about us growing old together?”

It’s a random question, but you don’t even look up. “Of course. We’re definitely growing old together, Wonwoo, you’re stuck with me for eternity. You’re not wriggling out of this now.”

That makes him smile a little, struck by the natural way you’d said it. “Oh, am I not?”

“Nope.” You pick one bottle, and point it in Wonwoo’s direction. “You, Jeon Wonwoo, are going to be loved by me forever. Whether you like it or not.”

You grin, putting the bottle in the cart, and then drag him to the checkout. He’s smiling at you, so fondly, and he knows he looks like an idiot.

But, well. He would like that. A lot.

[solannn]

Haikyuu x Cat!male!reader

description: which,a cat human,[M/N] tries to forget his human past as a cat but it’s isn’t it's not easy as he thought

remember : this story implied male reader and I’m really strict about a fem aligned about reading it you can read it just don’t fetishized it please there’s no nsfw bcs the character aren’t adults so minor are accepted.

KITTY; 01

═══ ⋆★⋆═══

You had 2 owners, one is named Kuroo and the other Kenma.

Kuroo is the one who adopted him alone on a desolate street

Kenma sometimes visited you because you lived with Kuroo. Now you've been living with him for about 2 years, you've gotten used to seeing him leave first thing in the morning to go to class.

You decide to go to his room and the first thing you notice is his volleyball, do you remember seeing her playing with Kenma, won't it do any harm if you try to copy their actions?

You transform into a human and take the ball in your hands, at first you didn't understand the basics so you forced yourself to watch tutorials on the computer.

It's 1:30 p.m. you went to eat for your lunch break, you picked up the ball and started playing again for hours but you forgot that your owner came back around 8 p.m. and you made a mess of the house

The door opened, Kuroo was the first to notice he had his mouth open when he noticed you he exclaimed

"WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU ??" He enters the house and looks around to find his cat.

“WHAT ARE YOU DOING WITH MY CAT? ARE YOU AN ANIMAL KIDNAPER?? A THIE-” he noticed that you had cat ears and a tail.

“…” He looked you straight in the eyes you didn’t know what to say the room became silent before Kenma arrived.

“I didn’t know you had a b-” Kenma started to say appearing from behind making Kuroo jolt. Kuroo cut him off “I DON’T HAVE A BOYFRIEND."

🧚‍♂️

“Are you trying to tell me you’re my cat, Kitty?” You were sitting on the couch talking everyone thought you were crazy in this room.

Oh yes, you forgot that they called you 'Kitty' because of Hello Kitty and the lack of originality.

You sigh trying to find your words “Touch my ear” The 2 boys raised their eyebrows Kuroo took your ear and pulled it very hard, he could tear it off you cried out in pain.

“I SAID TOUCH NOT PULL.” “YOU NEVER KNOW OK!!” he shouted back. Kenma was massaging his tampons because they were screaming so loudly.

“See I’m real!” You said letting a sigh escape your mouth you didn't know why but you couldn't transform yourself maybe from one to stress or something else probably.

You closed your eyes trying to concentrate, you took deep breaths and relaxed your shoulders. A few seconds passed and you became a cat again, you meowed. Kuroo & Kenma look at you in pure shock.

“Now I believe you it wasn’t so hard to do that” said the boy you gave him a glare,a death glare.

🐱

You turned back into a human to talk to them, you sighed “Calling me [M/N] is better than Kitty” you said, scratching the back of your head.

“Why was Kitty a good first name?” Complains Kuroo “It was shitty and no originality 😐” said Kenma “hey! I had no idea ok?☹️”.

“Actually, if you went to high school, that would be great, wouldn’t it?” “Yeah..” Kenma replied with his eyes on his console.

Kuroo smirked, imagining scenarios where you were in high school “ you should hide your tail and your ears” you nodded Kuroo already had an idea in mind.

"But how old are you? In your human form ig" Kenma asked curiosily if you didn’t mind "I’m 16 years I think I should be in second year" Kenma nodded

“Ah! I almost forgot, [M/N]” a warm smile appeared on his face before disappearing “you clean the house 😘". You sighed

═══ ⋆★⋆═══

[its-time-to-write]

Hey!!! I hope you are doing well and with all life’s downs you have more ups!!! You’re a fantastic writer and love your voice! If you are willing/interested in could you write something involving the reader watching videos of little Jamie (like when things Georgie would have recorded of him at youth matches or school plays or just Jamie being a cheeky little bugger) and either it’s happening back at Manchester or a little career throwback video thing because he won something big or it’s like his 100th match at Richmond and the reader is helping put together this video to play for Jamie

Hey! Yeah I am doing well, just mega busy bc of holidays and everyone needing therapy and whatevs. Hope you’re well as well🩵🩵

play it back

“So he was always a little shit, huh?” you comment. You’re sitting on Georgie’s couch as you help her convert videos from old cameras to her computer.

“Oh yes,” she laughs. “But such a cute little bugger. Had the whole neighborhood wrapped around his finger.”

You click through videos, landing on one of him sitting on the grass. He’s not quite one, but he’s sitting up and clapping his pudgy hands.

“Oh my god, I can’t with that face,” you groan. “He’s too cute. I just want to squeeze him.”

“There’s a video of his first birthday party on here somewhere,” Georgie says, and you scramble to find it. You open a video of baby Jamie with his face covered in blue frosting. His hands are covered in chunks of cake, and he’s waving them around while laughing.

“The neighbors brought that cake over,” Georgie comments with a smile. “Jaim was being such a ham, making them laugh. He knew what he was doing, even then.”

You smile and continue forward. Baby Jamie in the tub, baby Jamie sleeping in his crib. Then toddler Jamie on Christmas.

“Show me what you’ve got,” comes Georgie’s voice from behind the camera.

Jamie’s tiny voice says, “It’s a fucking FOOTBALLLLL!” as he holds it over his head.

“Language, Jamie!” says Georgie, but you can tell she’s smiling. Jamie stands up and places the football on the ground.

Georgie says, “No, Jamie, don’t kick it in the-” and the camera tumbles to the ground. She swears, “Christ,” and it goes black.

“Classic,” you say.

Georgie chuckles a bit ruefully. “That was the beginning for him. Found it in a bargain bin and thought it’d get some of his fucking energy out. Think it just gave him more of a boost.”

The next is shaky footage of Jamie, aged six, as he runs on a pitch with other kids his age.

“Go, Jamieee!” Georgie screams. He barely looks at her as he kicks it into the goal, leagues ahead of the other team. He turns to his mum and gives her a thumbs up, followed by a swift two fingers up to the other team.

“Jamie, no!” Georgie shouts, and he switches back to a thumbs up and a shrug as if to say, I don’t know what you’re talking about. The video ends as the ref (someone’s father), pulls out a yellow card while trying to suppress laughter.

“Didn’t know you could get yellow cards at that age,” you grin.

“Well, you know Jamie; he played every part of that game,” Georgie replies.

“What are you on about?” Jamie asks, coming through the door. “Mum, you got the videos out?”

“She’s helping me put them on my new computer,” Georgie says. “Right helpful, she is. And tell me, what have you done today?”

Jamie blushes a bit. “Kicked the ball around the pitch. Soundly trounced some kids talking shit. Oh, and Simon and I went to get groceries.”

You raise an eyebrow. “And where are the groceries, Jamie?”

Jamie says, “Oh shit,” and rushes back outside to help Simon.

You roll your eyes affectionately and press play on the next video.

This one is another match, and Jamie’s older, maybe ten? It’s shot through the window of the council estate as he walks up, presumably from school. He’s dragging his feet but he’s got something in his hand.

“This was me birthday,” Georgie whispers.

“Whatcha got, Jaim?” Georgie asks as he swings the door open.

He smiles and launches himself into her arms, and for a moment, the camera is pointed at the ground. It gets righted and pointed at his smiling, dimpled face as he shoves a bundle of slightly wilted flowers into focus.

“Happy Birthday, Mummy!” he smiles. They’ve obviously been plucked on his walk back home from school.

“Thank you, baby,” she replies and again, you don’t need to see her to know she’s smiling. Georgie sweeps him into her arms as the video shuts off.

Georgie sniffs. “His dad had been round the day before. I had a fucking shiner to put the moon to shame that’s for sure, but my baby boy always knew how to get me smiling again.”

You lean your head against hers and she motions for you to keep on to the next video.

You click through a couple until you find one of him on the pitch again. It’s a couple years later and he’s a teenager, maybe thirteen, and he’s completely skipped the gangly phase you always thought was mandatory to growing up.

“He were twelve there,” Georgie says. “Got scouted in that very match.”

“Started me whole career,” Jamie interjects as he comes into the kitchen with an armful of bags. Simon’s right behind him, arms full as well.

You raise your eyebrows in surprise, but it’s not that shocking. You can tell he’s good, even at age twelve.

Jamie deposits the bags and wiggles into the non-existent space between you and Georgie.

“I was dead cute, weren’t I?” he asks.

“You were,” you agree. “Not sure what’s happened in recent years.”

Jamie protests with an, “Oi!” as you and Georgie dissolve into giggles. Simon (wisely) decides to stay out of it and busy himself with putting the food away.

“I’m putting these on the cloud so I can have that at home,” you tell Jamie, and he worms his way closer next to you.

“Mint. You gonna start a Jamie-table like mum, too?”

“Fuck no,” you reply. “You’re head’s fucking big enough as-is.”

“You like my big head,” he says, and you smack him.

“Not in front of your mum!” you shriek as he tickles your sides. Georgie gets up off the couch to go kiss Simon while Jamie continues to terrorize you, kissing all over your face as you make half-hearted attempts to push him off. He was cute back then, but your favorite version of Jamie is definitely the one you get to hold in your arms right now.

[dumbponyboykinnie]

how do the outsiders play minecraft and idgaf that they live in the 60s it’s a modern au

pony builds in creative mode and spawns hundreds of animals; once the game bugged and all his animals disappeared and he cried (my younger brother reference); also makes pixel art; scared to turn on survival mode

darry used to be like a professional like he has beaten the enderdragon several times and he loved the game so much but he doesn’t have time to play anymore and he doesn’t check updates so when pony shows him the stuff he built he’s like “since when does minecraft have axolotls” (my older brother reference)

steve puts tnts on other people’s houses in coop and explodes them. especially on poor ponyboy’s houses. steve hasn’t got like a super powerful computer so it freezes all the time he does it. yells and cusses at everyone who plays with him for every little mistake they make but soda can die in lava with full netherite armor and inventory fulled with diamonds and steve won’t say a word

two-bit builds block dicks all over the game world; cant play seriously, usually just goofs around and then dies in lava and gets yelled at bc he loses all the cool stuff steve gave to him to free his own inventory, like all the diamonds and stuff; his fav animal is a sheep and he spawns hundreds of them in pony’s worlds

soda was taught how to play by darry when they were both kids but darry usually did all the work and soda just goofed around and helped him (at least he thought so; and darry loved him too much to tell him that he’s not helping) ; is too bored to do routine things like mining and stuff so he turns on creative mode and takes netherite swords and armor and then turns back to survival mode and goes to fight ender dragon and still dies and complains to everyone

johnny usually finds a village and lives there, adopts animals and names every single one, grows crops, protects the villagers and slowly develops!! he’s a good player in general; sometimes plays together with dally

dally names every dog he adopts tim and has a black cat named johnny, but he did those two things for completely opposite reasons. tries to speedrun the game but always fails and dies accidentally, then screams his lungs out cussing; sometimes plays together with johnny

when johnny and dally play together johnny just does what he usually does and dally wants to show off so when they explore some caves together he’s like “i’ll protect you” and fights with 5 zombies at once and then gets shot by a skeleton and johnny just stands there bc his super old and slow computer is frozen again

[girlfriendsofthegalaxy]

tuesday again 8/20/2024

a little light this week bc i had a fairly wretched week, medically speaking

listening

hozier's nobody's soldier would have been on every 8tracks mix for every character. THEEEEE blorbo song of all time to the point i am already annoyed at the thought of seeing it on every spotify mix. fuckin owns tho. very fun mod sixties heist taste to the horn arrangement

-

reading

thank you philip.

polished off the Marauders (2019-2022) comics. i liked the first volume way more than these three-- they didn't quite deliver the same quality of art or swashbuckles-per-minute. also this was probably not a great choice for someone who has forgotten what little she once knew about the xmen, even though they came at the beginning of a reboot.

why did i read these? mostly bc they were readily available or with short wait times at my library and my bestie is making me watch all the xmen movies. a girl gets curious about comic books sometimes

surprisingly, i came across this one from the Pocket integration on the firefox new tabs

McDonald likens the functions of Spotify to Google Maps. “Google Maps doesn’t do the exploration for me, but it’s helpful if I go somewhere,” he says. Rather than taking us on guided tours, it provides the tools for us to navigate somewhere new. Much as it shows us what’s nearby and how to get there, and flags notable landmarks others have visited, Spotify helps us access most music, lists global listening trends, and introduces us to artists similar to those we already know. But it’s communities that help us home in on a destination Spotify can help us explore.

part two of breaking down infamous academic paper mill Hindawi and why it was bought by Wiley anyway bc they did seemingly no due diligence, bc as a whole they do very little actual work in the publishing process.

i have included a very long quote bc it is one of only two things that made me genuinely laugh out loud this week (the other was phil unsticking a claw from the couch by backflipping herself out)

One issue of Wireless Communications and Mobile Computing from 2022, edited mostly by Hamurabi Gamboa Rosales, took an average of about 20 days to go from initial submission to revision submission. This is not unlikely, it’s impossible. The easiest way to explain this is with an analogy. Say there’s a pothole outside your house, and you call the council. You tell them ‘there’s a big hole in the road outside my house!’ The person at the other end, rather than tiredly telling you to fill out a form - which is what councils do all over the world, in my experience - instead yells ‘MOTHER OF GOD! WE’RE RIGHT ON IT!’ Twenty minutes later, a bitumen truck comes HURTLING around the corner of your street at full send, with the road workers hanging out the back of it, the driver leaning on the horn and yelling ‘GET OUT OF THE WAY! POTHOLE!’ They pull up outside your house, and you see the brakes go hot. But the guys don’t even wait for it to stop, they jump off while it’s slowing down, and they grab pry bars and a burner and a kettle of bitumen, and they start hammering out the edges, pour the bitumen and start slamming it with hammers almost at the same time. In about six minutes, the hole is filled and flattened, and they admire their work for about four hundred milliseconds and SCREAM off the way they came. No sooner has the truck disappeared, then your phone rings - and it’s the council worker from before. ‘POTHOLE! *pant* *pant* FIXED! Happy to be of service!’ *click* That’s how likely the entire editorial process taking 20 days is.

-

watching

i don't understand why the third xmen movie isn't named x cubed. it extremely is not their last stand there are like a dozen more movies to go. gun to my head i could not tell you what happened in this one. whatsherface did look good as hell though

and now for the movie i actually want to talk about, Monkey Man (2024, dir. Patel). imdb says:

An anonymous young man unleashes a campaign of vengeance against the corrupt leaders who murdered his mother and continue to systematically victimize the poor and powerless.

i am so so so lucky that my favorite kind of fight scene — fast, brutal, right spaces with improvised weapons-- is fashionable. pour it DIRECTLY into my open mouth

i think i generally agree with a broad sweep of reviewers here when i tell you that this movie is gorgeous and grossnasty at the same time, there are a lot of ideas that aren't all quite resolved, and i am much more interested in why it has a hell of a lot of ideas (part of why they don't all get resolved).

patel's first movie, it feels very much like a movie of someone who isn't sure they'll be able to do another one, so throw everything you've got in here. a sort of famously rocky production and shoestring budget, but you would not know it. the club scenes are especially dripping in glitz and, like many stage productions, have a lot of clever editing and strategic deployment of mirrors and repeats. there's a fight scene with hanging mirrors near the end where the mirrors can't have been more than fifty bucks each but it looks SO fucking sick.

i am much more willing to go to bat for this movie and ignore some of the rough edges bc it is so refreshingly earnest, and despite the style references, is very focused on being its own thing. at some points it's going to feel like The Matrix (1999, dir. the Wachowskis) bc every movie made in a post- The Matrix (1999, dir. the Wachowskis) world is going to feel a little bit like The Matrix (1999, dir. the Wachowskis). or like when the above gif happened in the movie it did not make me want to turn it off and go watch the first john wick.

people who live in india or are part of the diaspora are a little cranky about the political parties of the film, which had to be neutered for release. while i don't think i would have grasped all the nuances even if we did have the original cut, i think it's likely some of the characters would have resolved a little cleaner if that original intent was still there.

why did i watch this? i think patel is easily as hot as tumblr darling mifune. while drafting this post i got distracted sooooooo many times trying to pick the perfect gif. some of them are too hot!!!

-

playing

fallow week

-

making

just stayin alive! just livin the fuckin dream!!!

[blossom-hwa]

a detailed analysis of rizz levels across pretty much every group I stan 

chip ( @wingkkun​​ ) and I had a very interesting conversation about this a couple months ago. here are the results, complete with direct citations and paraphrasing from our instagram dms. I do not take constructive criticism but I will entertain debates in my inbox. think of it as a scientific peer review

table of contents (in order): txt | seventeen | stray kids | ateez | the boyz | honorary mentions (golcha, nct, p1h, beomhan)

(disclaimer: all of this is meant in good fun and is not meant to be rude or harmful to any member I talk about. I love every one of them and in the end this is all just a joke!)

TXT.

soobin: below the charts. this man has negative infinity rizz. less rizz than me and that’s saying something bc I only ever flirt on accident if I tried to do it on purpose the world would explode. the limit of his rizz as you approach any point is negative infinity and I do not feel sorry for saying this. in the wise words of chip, “we like you bc ur ultimate cringefail (affectionate)”

taehyun: net positive rizz. I'm definitely biased but also do not argue with me I will bite your face off. the amount of rizz he has is a true problem and I am not immune to it (neither are you). he’s so cute and he’s also so hot and smart and I'm never going to shut up if I keep going so I'll stop. positive rizz. off the charts. do not @ me.

beomgyu: please refer to hoshi’s bit below. they are one and the same. beomgyu had too much rizz it was eating him alive so his body compressed and converted it (lossless compression) to another form and now he’s a chaos monster who screams for a living and oozes what remains of his original rizz onstage. we love him for it

hyuka: +10 rizz because he’s cute. no more than that because he’s an overgrown baby (affectionate). he gives me a lot of brain damage but it’s just because of his plushies and his little brother energy so I feel like he could manipulate me with his rizz but it would only go so far before I either pat his head bc he’s so cute or I punch him in the face bc of the annoying sibling energy therefore he only gets ten points

yeonjun: after going through the entirety of our conversation I realize now that chip and I forgot to diagnose the rizz levels of the fourth gen it boy so now I'm pulling some shit out of my ass. net positive but low magnitude. I give him +3. mostly because he’s got insane stage presence and has the ability to kick beomgyu in the face but he’s soooooo pathetic. possibly reading skye’s ( @warmau​​ ) thoughts about him have influenced me but he’s pathetic hence the very very low magnitude of rizz. I am not sorry

SEVENTEEN.

mingyu: rizzless. I direct you to this post I made because it’s factual and explains his horrifically low levels of rizz. do not be fooled by this man’s muscles he’s constantly screaming crying throwing up to be told he’s sexy but the second someone does tell him that he’s a blushing anime girl (affectionate) and we love him for it but he’s rizzless. negative off the charts

jun: rizzless but not in the same manner as mingyu he just does not know what rizz is. very similar to juyeon in this manner. the8 or dino have definitely tried to explain rizz to him before but he simply does not understand and does not care to. even if he did understand it I'm still not certain he’d care which gives him a lower magnitude rizz than mingyu which is better even if it’s still negative

the8: positive rizz with quite a high magnitude. I can’t quantify it but it doesn’t even matter because even though he has rizz he doesn’t use it. he’d rather tell us to stop having a parasocial relationship with people behind our little computer screens and ooze rizz via charisma on stage instead and I can respect that.

seungkwan: so much rizz. so much fucking rizz have you ever seen this man complimenting female idols on shows. have you ever seen this man tell idols they’re pretty and wonderful and beautiful in every which way without batting a damn eye and with so much earnestness I blush. cannot believe chip ever thought this man as on the same level of rizzlessness as soob smh

vernon: 0 rizz, but this does not mean he is rizzless. rizz is a spectrum and having 0 levels of it just means you are rizz neutral. purely neutral. no one has purely neutral rizz the way vernon does he’s simply so special. that one gose episode where he showed up in that rainbow hoodie with red glasses? that’s the epitome of rizz neutrality

s.coups: refer to daeyeol’s bit below. handsome. reliable. have you seen him with kkuma. I melt every time. unfortunately he is still horrifically pathetic and though we adore him for it this does unfortunately decrease his rizz levels drastically. without it he’d probably be somewhere at positive infinity but now he’s at like +8. the world knew that if coups wasn’t pathetic enough he’d be too powerful so they had to humble him.

hoshi: he doesn’t have rizz but it’s not like the nerds where their rizz levels are just buried in the negatives it’s more like the magnitude of his rizz was so high that it has since been compressed and turned into something else. so he has no rizz but it’s not because he was born pathetic, it’s because it was converted due to the law of conservation of rizz (real)

wonwoo: similar to taehyun in that they’re both very positive but slightly different. yes they are both gym rats yes they are both token introverts (sort of) but wonwoo is a gamer. their rizz is fundamentally different but they’ve evolved to be similar due to their personalities kinda like wings on bats and birds. as you can tell it’s been a while since I took biology

jeonghan: similar to lino in that he has rizz but he stole it. the difference between them is that lino has some natural organic rizz while jeonghan was born with none and stole all that he owns now. without this stolen rizz he would be a limp noodle dragging himself across the earth but now he’s a fairy. life isn’t fair

dino: negative but low magnitude. the first number I gave him was -14 I don’t really know why it was -14 specifically but the point is it’s supposed to be low magnitude. recently he began climbing my bias list and chip yesterday convinced me to change his magnitude to to something lower so I now give him -4. I am easily swayed

joshua: positive rizz in the same manner as jangjun et al. the man is fucking insane. insane charisma but also just plain insane. I'm not entirely convinced he didn’t steal some of it but while jeonghan freely admits that he stole it joshua keeps evading the question. there is a venn diagram of jangjun et al and lino et al and joshua is in the intersection

woozi: I considered an intersection between chanhee and the8 and I think woozi falls into it. perhaps I've just been gaslit into thinking he has positive rizz but let’s just roll with the thought. has some rizz like the8 (less than the8 though) but does not care to use it (like chanhee) and also doesn’t really care that it’s there. he just kinda lets it be

dk: net negative but low magnitude. I originally gave him -13 to bc I thought he was a step above dino but not by much. I still kind of think this way so I'm elevating him to -3 since dino got elevated to -4. sorry dino I think you’ll always be one step behind no matter how big of a crush I have on you

STRAY KIDS. 

lino: has rizz but in the wrong way. the man touches butts for a living AND he has cats he’s got to have some rizz hence the net positive but he also definitely stole some. please refer to my comments on this post for details he definitely does not organically have all this rizz but he’s stolen it and now it’s his you can’t ask for it back

chan: also has rizz but in the wrong way but also differently from lino. chan should not have as much rizz as he does but he’s got that “libra sun scorpio venus rizz” (chip) which makes him extremely dangerous. he’s a loser and for that I'd give him negative rizz but unfortunately he has an aura that separates him from the likes of mingyu (it’s the dilf dad energy) so he has net positive rizz of a dangerous magnitude.

jisung: we welcome another member to the ranks of the negative infinity rizz. do I even need to explain. does the anime girl babygirl pathetic cute energy not already do enough explanation for you. I should not have to spell out the fact that this man is rizzless at every point on the mathematic plane. I love him to death but that will not save him from the rizzless fate

seungmin: please refer to jangjun in the honorary mentions below. his rizz applies here. positive rizz. high magnitude. ridiculous for a man of his caliber but here we are. he’s got some weird mutant rizz and that’s all I can really say like.....what do you become when you have rizz levels +69,420. what do you fucking do. 

changbin: fluctuates between +10 and -10 like a sine curve (please refer to mingi’s bit for more information). his positive rizz is similar energy to yunho but louder and his negative rizz is just pathetic baby boy-ness. I adore him. big muscle men who are soft. I don’t have a section for wonho but if I did they’d be of very similar types. 

hyunjin: negative rizz. he’s an only child what else do I need to say. ferret energy. flails around. long limbs that he doesn’t know what to do with. so much baby girl energy I always want to laugh at him (affectionate). lovely boy so very lovely with such fucking negative rizz

felix: like jangjun and co his rizz got converted but unlike jangjun and co it was not converted to insanity. it was converted to something...... alien. idk how to explain it. asymptotic rizz, according to chip. weird behavior as x approaches infinity. I agree with this assessment. nothing earthly explains how this man is so ethereal so I have concluded that alien magic converted his rizz to ethereality

jeongin: ok so I did say vernon is the only one who’s truly reached rizz neutral but jeongin is pretty close. similar vibes. they’re both slightly insane of course but they are also more than likely to just stand there and vibe. this gives off rizz neutrality. jeongin is less neutral (probably tipped in the negative direction) but he’s getting there. 

ATEEZ.

seonghwa: rizzless this man is the nerdiest nerd ever he is RIZZLESS. magnitude infinity in the negative region of the graph. he and soobin are two sides of the same coin the latter is a lanky little gamer dude and the former is a Star Wars nerd with a display case for his figurines. the absolute most negative rizz ever (affectionate)

yunho: oooooooo my god. positive rizz if I've ever seen one. so much rizz. so much fucking rizz. the magnitude of his rizz is off the charts and unlike the other insane ones his rizz didn’t get converted so he is DANGEROUS. if you ever meet this man in the wild run in the other direction you will not survive his pull. in the wise words of chip “yunho has |rizz| (absolute positive rizz)”

mingi: his rizz...fluctuates. like a sine curve idk. he alternates between having so much rizz it hurts and so little rizz it’s laughable. yes I have definitely been influenced by having seen him in concert twice (do NOT bring up the fact that he became a wrecker after the second). he knows he’s hot and will use that to the best of his ability but he’s also kind of pathetic and for some reason it doesn’t balance out so he fluctuates

jongho: has rizz. does not care to use it. falls in the same camp of the the8-ers (refer to the seventeen section) in which he prefers to simply ooze rizz onstage and kill everyone’s heart there instead of flirting with fans. respectable. also incredibly dangerous. everyone wants to hug him but if you try to his rizz will snap you in half but if not huggable then why hug shape?

hongjoong: net positive rizz but he’s convinced he has more than he does so I dock several points due to excessive confidence. panics too much when wooyoung tries to kiss him for me to restore them. if he gay panicked a little less then I might consider him having as much rizz as he says he does but alas he does not and so I will not. 

san: -10 rizz. negative but not too negative. he’s really cute and really hot but also really pathetic and I say this with the greatest fondness imaginable. remember that one poll where tiny voted him as the person they’d least like to vacation w bc he’d stay inside (don’t worry me too san)? same vibes. his patheticness outweighs his hotness and while they’re close, ultimately patheticness wins out. sorry not sorry

yeosang: net positive rizz but he does not use it. this is not by choice. he just doesn’t know how to. in fact I'm not fully convinced he knows what rizz is. in this manner he is somewhat similar to juyeon (refer to the boyz section below) except where juyeon’s rizz is negative infinity yeosang has some positive levels. in chip’s words get well soon yeo

wooyoung: falls in the same camp as hyunjae in that he has fully negative rizz and embraces this fact to use it as a weapon. dangerous man. fully insane. if his rizz was positive he’d be the same as jangjun and co but unfortunately he’s pathetic for hongjoong so his rizz is negative and is not handled the same way. 

THE BOYZ.

hyunjae: all of Bermuda line is rizzless to the max but in different ways. in hyunjae’s case he knows he is rizzless and fully accepts and utilizes this to his benefit. you’re telling me this man doesn’t know how pathetic (fond) he is? he’s self aware and will absolutely use this against you. as dangerous as those with high positive levels of rizz. watch the fuck out

younghoon: fully rizzless bc he’s in Bermuda line but is not self aware. in fact he protests that he does have positive rizz but look at this man. he has the energy of a dying victorian child trying to make it past this cold, cold winter. all you want to do is pat his head and coo at him to make him feel better he has no rizz. absolute negatives. 

juyeon: again, completely and negatively rizzless since he’s in Bermuda line but like younghoon he is fully unaware. in a different way though. why you ask? because this man definitely has no idea what rizz is. look at his sweet little eyes and tell me he knows. that’s right. you can’t. 

q: negative rizz. not as low as Bermuda line/seonghwa/soobin/etc. but still quite negative. the thing is no one ever tells him this or brings it up to his face because he’s dangerous. he may not know what rizz is but he does know what an insult is and if you say a word about his purported negative rizz levels you will not be heard from again. this is a warning. 

sangyeon: has net positive rizz. it isn’t super high but given the fact that I've just said four of his members have some of the lowest rizz levels imaginable it’s relatively high in the realm of tbz. can’t really explain it but he gets this rizz from his hot tired uncle energy that no one is immune to. have you seen him with his nephews? don’t argue with me. 

(at this point chip told me to stop making rizz comments bc their stomach hurt. I did not stop)

kevin: rizz levels -1. not quite negative infinity. in fact pretty far from it. still negative though and he’ll never recover from that. I'd say that I'm sorry but I'm really not no matter how much this man works out I will never be able to stop laughing at him to his face (in best friend fashion). love you kev

new: negative. not horrifically so like Bermuda line but still more negative than kev. you may be thinking what the fuck lina new has so much rizz wdym? you’re wrong. he doesn’t have rizz and he doesn’t care. his lack of care gives the illusion that he actually has positive rizz but he does not. do not be fooled

haknyeon: POSITIVE RIZZ. do not question the positive rizz of tangerine boy ju haknyeon. it may not be positive infinity but I do say he’s around +50ish and given the patheticness that surrounds him that’s pretty fucking good I’d say. so much rizz. so much true rizz. I love him

sunwoo: the most negative fucking rizz ever except he’s convinced it’s positive.  see without this unfounded conviction his rizz would just be somewhere around -50 and he’d be fine because Bermuda line exists but nooooo he decided to ruin it by being overly confident in his rizz powers so now he’s at negative infinity and one. sucks to suck.

jacob: (chip came up with this one) he has beomgyu and jangjun levels of rizz so like rizz off the charts but while a lot of it was converted into weirdness some of it stayed rizz so. hm. a tamer version of jangjun if you will. however beware because his rizz is once again increasing since he stopped playing league. watch out.

eric: negative rizz. same boat as sunwoo. their rizz magnitudes are the exact same and in the same direction (negative obviously) but it’s in a slightly different manner. both have unfounded confidence in their imaginary positive rizz levels but eric’s is in the manner of a teacher’s pet who thinks they’re popular while sunwoo is just plain mad

HONORARY MENTIONS.

jangjun (golden child): positive rizz and it’s terrible. I can’t tell you what the number is (it’s +69,420) but it’s really fucking high and I hate it. most of his rizz has been compressed and converted like hoshi’s to something resembling insanity but unlike hoshi there is a dangerous amount left. beware this man

daeyeol (golden child): +5 rizz. he’s handsome and reliable and if we got married I would be able to trust him to get things done. similar to sangyeon in that he’s got hot tired uncle energy but he’s also pathetic so he only gets five rizz points

mark (nct): negative rizz if I've ever seen one, but missing the negative infinity rizz by one point. I just need him differentiated from soobin and jisung and the other pathetic ones. mark is pathetic but I give him one point out of pity

beomhan (??): I don’t know anything about this guy except that he can’t cook and has high cholesterol problems from eating too many eggs but he’s in the same group as jangjun and co

keeho (p1h): I also don’t know anything about this guy except what chip has told me but I think he’s similar to chanhee and chip thinks he’s on sunwoo’s level. do with this information what you will

[uh-oh-its-bird]

Old highschool tropes are outdated, when do we get the updated version?

- that one girl who inexplicably hates the cheerleaders and actively wishes for one of them to fall from the top of the pyramid and break her arm for no real reason

- that group of boys who sit at the back of the room and very loudly and graphically pretend to have gay sex

- the takis girls w the hoops and the long nails and their one gay guy friend who all loudly tell the teacher they're gonna run a strip club when they're older and if the teacher comes by they'll get free drinks from the bar

- that one weird kid who's definatley watching hentai in class and or reading bootleg yaoi off wattpad

- the kid who passes around a flash drive with bootleg minecraft downloaded on it to all the other kids so they can play RL craft in class on their computers (the teacher does not give a shit)

- the band kids and choir kids who appear to have some sort of blood feud going for them

- the 6th ""permanant"" substitute teacher of the year bc the school can't find an actual teacher to hire and all the subs eventually quit too. He's visibly checked out of the lessons and gives free reign to the children so long as no fires are set (nothing has been taught in this class since the first month of school and graduation is in 3 more months)

- the kid who comes to school with wet hair dye still in their hair and on their eyebrows, who then washes it out in the school bathrooms and stains the skins

- the kids who vape in the bathroom, causing the entire school to lose bathroom privileges (not to be confused with the kids who ripped the stall doors off the stalls, though they are equally at fault)

- the substitute who used to work in the government as security for notable politicians and has the type of personality that everyone actually believes it (she has that standing invitation to go to the students strip club for free drinks one day)

- the kid unfortunate enough to find a trash bag filled with used condoms in the bathroom

- the gay kids (they band together like rats)

- the kids with horrific home lives who casually drop genuinley just the worst thing you could possibly think could happen them, yeah whatever you're thinking is right, randomly at lunch as everyone else at the table goes "Wow that's wild" then keeps eating their shitty cafeteria pizza

- that other kid who always comes to school sleep deprived because they couldn't sleep over the noise of their dad and new step mom having incredibly loud sex (every day they draw closer to running away)

- the one red haired kid who gets ostracized for being a ginger (and also that time they threw a fully frozen juice box at someone and had to get an in school restraining order against them for assult)

- the "seizure kid" who got a seizure at the school dance once and instantly became famous for it

- The principle who published erotica and can not hold a single assembly without someone in the crowd screaming "I LOVED YOUR BOOK" and someone else screaming "WHAT WAS YOUR FAVORITE PART" back at them, so they scream "THE PART WITH THE BUTT STUFF" (she later quits only to be replaced with a principle referred to by students as "pedo mustache")

[saturday-byte]

Hope this doesn’t bother you a lot, but can we get some headcanons of the teachers? I was curios about ur vision for them

Dw it doesn't bother me !! I love getting asks ^^

Anyway it's going under read more bc this feels like a long one

Sketch

• she/they enby, omnisexual (<- me when I'm projecting)

• mentor figure for the newer teachers

• gives drawings and crafts as gifts, might or might not have various voodoo dolls

• uses Colin as a monitor for digital art

Tony

• he/him, bisexual

• you CANNOT tell me he doesn't drink tea 24/7. Most British mf I have ever seen

• weird hearing, very sensitive to loud sounds but can barely hear normal talking tones. Applies to his own voice too so that's why he screams a lot

• kind of an inferiority complex for the decaying use of clocks over technology lol

Shrignold

• gay and homophobic idgaf

• aware of the harm he's doing but genuinely loves his cult- "family" a lot

• likes telenovelas, granny type of beat

Colin

• he/it Libramasc, pansexual (here I am, projecting once again)

• has haphephobia but is working on it (this one might as well be canon idk)

• everyone has a computer day, so even if you see him every day you only get screentime once a year

• autism 🫵

• his tail is retractable

• has SO MANY viruses, that's why he glitches and talks slow

Healthy band

• doing them all together bc how can you think of them alone :[ don't separate them

• common fanon of them being a family ykn the drill

• their "birthday" (or date of release lol) is actually fridge and steaks anniversary

• depending on the day they either make the most rancid bizarre food or a 5 stars, Gordon Ramsay approved meal

• running on the same luck, fridge can either be filled with normal groceries, nothing (you have to buy groceries) or gore. Like those are his guts leave him alone

• everyone hiding inside fridge is apparently a normal bonding experience

• bread boy is transfem !! (Should we start calling her something different?)

• spinach is also a she/they enby, nobody in here isn't lgbtq

Lamp

• he/him but doesn't really care, pansexual

• has been trying to be sober but he's already very fucked up, that's why he's like That™ in the TV show

• the other teachers we see in his episode are his party friends

• absolutely watches the others dreams, likes to bother them about what they mean

★ ok now the TV show ones

Briefcase

• has an absurd amount of skills, barbie kind of ridiculous

• lives with his brother and sustains them both

• workaholic

• was mr.petersons before red guy

• actually not that bad he's just really fast paced, genuinely just lost the trio on the fabric

Coffin

• he/him goth gf <3

• doesn't like music AT ALL. And is very mean about it

• besties with the tissue box !!

• originally only used his hush tone for work but it slowly morphed into his normal voice

• pretty bad PTSD

• very kind with kids and people in general tbh, it might be something useful for his job but it's just how he is really

Lily and Todney

• I don't think about them a lot sorry

• they know what they are doing and that their whole family dynamic is pretty fucked but they genuinely just really want a mom tho ,,,

Warren the wo-Eagle

• genuinely just hate him so I don't think about him a lot either lol

• had no power over the trio because he was fired and not technically a teacher anymore

• his whole Thing (ykn) comes from bullying and a feeling of inferiority. He still sucks tho

Mr.Transport

• well. I guess I just don't think a lot about the newer teachers

• was actually a really nice teacher before still going to work at 120 years old

• nobody really liked him but he was the other's only way of going outside the house so they endured him

• there was a fight over his will. People died

Electracey

• she/they enby n°3, lesbian

• really scared to touch her batteries now, has caused her to get cranky but still refuse to change them until forced

• puts up light shows for her friends

• huge sci-fi and videogames in general fan

• Colin's cousin. Actually all electronics are related

• wanted to be a music teacher but her biology said no

★ this is more of a general one but all of them are somewhere in the aroace spectrum !! I think it comes with the object nature. I have not defined where all of them fall tho

That's it I think. This is so long I am so sorry I just enjoy them a lot so I have a lot of thoughts

[sisterofficerlucychen]

Hi there again 👋🏼 just wanting to vent my feelings again.

This whole break up has me going trough all stages of grief all at once. First I was in complete denial and then just really sad. Now I'M ANGRY. Not to the show or cast, ANGRY AT TIM. As if he had broke up with me and not Lucy.

Been rewatching the show and I just saw the DOD episode and him being all worried about her and I was just screaming at my PC YOUUUU TIM BRADFORD PUBLIC ENEMY NUMBER 1 DONT GET TO ACT WORRIED AND HER HERO AND THEN DUMP HER 4 SEASONS LATERRRR

I know i might sound crazy but just went from sad about them to being angry at him in a split of a second with NO REASON AND being COMPLETELY UNREASONABLE

Anyways just looking somewhere to pour my heart and feelings. And a reminder that we all can feel different about this but none of that makes it right to throw hate and say mean things to Eric Melissa or anyone. I m just mad at Tim a fictional man that doesn't exist and not for that im going to say something horrible to Eric (actually if they are making us feel this so much is because they are good ay their jobs)

not hate just peace

hello ♡ pls, go ahead! always here to listen!

no but for real, i feel that in my soul lol. i think this is a place a lot of us currently are — all at different stages and feeling multiple of them at once. but lakfjsdklf mood. i’m starting to wonder if the 3 week hiatus is actually a good thing bc i think we’re all gonna need that time to get to a better place because it really does feel so personal??? 

i commend you for being able to do that 😂 i’ve gotten as far as rewatching 6x06 but there’s something about comfort watching my favorite episodes that i can’t right now, the wound’s too fresh lol. alkfsjdlfa not public enemy number one 😭 i love that you were screaming at your computer though 😂

for what it’s worth, i definitely don’t think so, it sounds very reasonable. i think your reaction rn is so valid like you’re still processing. i know i had a moment where i’ve kind of reached acceptance (i guess?) and saw a really sweet chenford tiktok and fell right back down to denial because i’m still so shocked by it. i also think you’re going about it in a pretty healthy way? like you said you’re upset at the character not the actor which is how it should be, you know what that boundary is.

love the reminder, thanks! and 100%. cast and crew are actual human beings who do not deserve hate thrown their way for doing their jobs and telling a story. it’s okay to be upset, it’s okay to feel everything you need to feel, but taking all of it out on the actual people never will be. you can be critical without being disrespectful. yes on them being good at their jobs! SO GOOD!!!! this is me speaking from personal experience but one of the most gratifying things about performing is getting a response/emotion from your audience bc you’re making them feel something whether it's positive or negative like you know you did something right haha.

[samandcolbyownme]

Summary: Anon request - “Heey, i hope u're good and i hope u're accepting requests. I'm in love with ur works and i was wondering if u could write a very smutty piece about Sam and the reader being best friends (she's living with snc, bc they've been best friends all their lives). Maybe lately both Sam and the reader start noticing each other a lot more than before, like y/n is studying one night and Sam comes back from his run, they have a late night snack and it's all blushy and cute. But the upcoming days there's a lot of sexual tension between them until Sam just decides to put an end to their friendship to become more. I hope it's ok ♥️”

Warnings: SMUT18+, strong language, unprotected sex, angst, hair pulling, choking, scratching, oral (f rec), fluff with filth

Word Count: 5.7k | Not Edited Yet

╔═══━━━─── • ───━━━═══╗

You sat on the couch, lap top on your lap as you typed up your paper for school. It was quiet since Sam and Colby went out to meet someone about a possible exploration, so you put your headphones on to drown out the silence.

You were too zoned out on getting this thing written that you completely missed the text Sam sent which stated that they would be home soon.

After ten more minutes of typing, you close your lap top and stand up, letting out a scream as they laugh, "Honey, we're home." Colby says with a laugh and you sigh, "I see that."

Sam smiles at you, and you hated when he did that, mainly because it made you fall more in love with him, and you couldn't do that.

You guys were best friends.

Emphasis on the friend's part. You knew them, pretty much your whole life, and even though they haven't ever really said it, you knew that it would even be weird to talk about it, or so you thought.

"How was the meeting thing?" You ask as they walk over towards you. Sam shrugs, "They're going to let us in, it's just a matter of finding out when exactly." He plops down onto the couch, "Get that paper done?"

You sit back down, opening your computer back up, "Almost. I need like two more paragraphs."

"What's it on again?" Colby asks turning your computer towards him, "Geoengineering technology? You are way too smart for your own good."

You laugh and you can see Sam staring at you lovingly but you don't want to get your hopes up, "Yeah, sometimes I wonder if that's why I get headaches, too much knowledge up here."

Colby laughs, "You know you don't have to go to school right? You can just fully commit to joining the xplr squad."

You roll your eyes, "We've been friends for how many years? I've been a part of that squad before it was even thought of."

Sam laughs as Colby nods while laughing, "You got me there. I'll give you that one." You smirk and look over at Sam, "Did you beat your time this morning? I wanted to ask but I had to leave before you got back."

Sam sighs, "yes and no. I did but not by much, so.."

"You'll get there. You have plenty of time." You smile at him and stand up, "I have an evening class tonight so I'll see you guys after five or so." You walk up to change, and right before you enter your room, Colby speaks, but it's not as quiet as he thinks, "You gotta tell her, bro."

You perk up, curious as to what they're talking about.

"There's no way. No, Colby. I can't just spring that on her." Sam argues back and his voice goes quiet, making it hard for you to hear.

You shake the thoughts out of your head and continue in to get dressed. You throw on a pair of jeans, sneakers, and one of the new hoodies from Sam's collection.

You grab your backpack and head back downstairs, "I'll see you guys later, do you want me to grab dinner on my way back?"

"Yeah, that'll be good." Colby looks at you and nods, "Get whatever, you know what we get." You smile and nod, "Okay."

Your eyes meet Sam's and he smiles at you. He loved seeing you in his own merch. You are his favorite model, but you didn't know that, for sure.

Sam's eyes stay on you as he watches you search for your keys,"by the microwave, y/n." You look over and lo and behold they're there, "Thank you!"

He yells out a quick, "Welcome!" as you leave the house. You make your way to your car, the thoughts running rabid through your mind,

He's got a girlfriend and he's going to ask me to move out because he knows I like him and it's weird.

You get in, sitting there for a moment before starting your car and driving to campus.

.·:*¨ ✘ ¨*:·.

"It's not weird at all." Your friend Lacey says leaning back in her chair, "You've been friends for a while, and I always say the friendship stage is the most important thing before dating someone. And you my friend, have it perfect."

You sigh, "But the way they were talking I just... I feel like he's going to tell me he is talking to someone and he knows I like him and- Gahhhh." You groan quietly and take a deep breath as she leans over, "I've witnessed you and Sam together in a room full of people, and I can tell you that he doesn't look at anybody the way he looks at you."

"Really?" You ask, her words giving you a little bit of hope and she nods, "Really. And just a little f.y.i, best friends don't look at each other the way you and Sam do."

You smile slightly as you think about what she said, "I just don't know how to tell him, like.. my anxiety about the friendship ending gets the best of me because I don't want to lose him, and I know him and Colby are a package deal, so I'd lose them both and it just-"

"Take a breather. Why don't you talk to Colby about it? I'm sure he knows a lot of their end."

You shake your head, "I couldn't do that. I feel like Sam is the one I need to talk to or not at all.. I just.. I just have to get over myself."

As your professor starts talking, you keep thinking about everything, but little did you know, Sam and Colby weren't editing videos like you thought, they were having almost the same conversation you and Lacey were having.

Growing up, the adults would pick on you and Sam for claiming to be just friends, and for a while there, it was really true, but as you got older, the truth was covered up.

Each video you have done with them, the fans have pointed out things about you and Sam. Some would be simple comments, basically what Lacey said, about how you look at each other.

Then others would be making a big deal out of you picking to run to Sam after something scared you during the investigation. Most of the time it's because Sam is right there, you'd run to Colby too if you needed to, but who are you kidding, Sam is your safe place so of course you'll run to him first.

You never commented back to it, because that would just lead to more confusing things, so you just brush it off most of the time. You've never say anything to Sam about it because you know more than likely already seen them, and if he hasn't said anything, why should you?

.·:*¨ ✘ ¨*:·.

You pull your phone out as you walk to your car, texting the group chat, I'm just going to go somewhere close, I have to study for a stupid test tomorrow and I don't want to be up all night.

You toss your backpack into the passenger seat and get in, reading Colby's reply, that's fine

Sam replies after, whatever is easiest for you.

You set your phone down and start driving, going where you need to go before heading home.

You see someone walking towards your car which makes you kind of skeptical about getting out. You reach up to lock your doors until you see the big X on the front of it, letting out a sigh of relief.

You push open your door and lean your head out, "Don't scare me like that."

"Like what?" Sam asks as he pushes his hood down, giving you a smile. You get out and stand up, "Walking towards my car when it's almost dark out with your hood up."

"Oh, yeah. Sorry. I just threw it on, I figured you'd need help carrying stuff in." He takes your backpack from your hands and slings it over his shoulder, "Anything else?"

You shake your head, "No I can get the rest. Thank you."

He nods, smiling at you for a few seconds before cleaning his throat, "Colby is hungry so we should probably get back in there."

"Of course he is." You laugh, grabbing everything else before walking inside with Sam. You wanted to blurt it out on your way up to the house, but it was like you couldn't speak at all.

"Finally." Colby teases as you walk in through the door that Sam held open for you, "Thanks." You mumble quietly, going back to normal volume when talking to Colby, "There was a line, I'm sorry."

He laughs as he points to you, "Don't let it happened again."

You salute him, "Yes sir, Colby sir."

"Yeah that's right." He laughs, making you laugh and Sam smiles as he enjoys how comical you and Colby are.

After dinner, you find yourself on the floor of the living room with your books spread out across the rug, "I'm so screwed." You mumble to yourself, "I should know this."

"Have trouble there Einstein?" Sam asks as he walks over to the couch and sits down. You look up at him and nod, "This stupid surprise test, that actually isn't a stupid surprise because I knew about it, I just forgot.." you laugh slightly, "Will be the death of me."

"Just relax, don't overdo it. When was the last time you took a break?"

Him being so caring makes it harder, no one has ever cared about you the way Sam does, "dinner."

"Y/n that was two hours ago." Sam laughs slightly and sighs, "Take a break, go shower or something. Reset and come back."

You push yourself off of the floor and sit, "Maybe you're the one who's too smart for their own good." You stand up, stretching and Sam can't help but notice your shirt ride up your stomach a little bit.

He shakes his head as his voice is low, "If that was the case then.." he trails off as Colby comes down the steps, "you're having a party and didn't invite me?"

"Yeah, you can help me study. We'll call it a study buddy party." You laugh as Colby stands right back up after sitting down, "No thanks. I'm out."

You laugh and toss your pen down, "I'm going for a shower anyway. I need a break." You hike it up the stairs and when you look back, Sam looks away from you quickly.

You look away smiling and make your way to the bathroom.

After a while of being upstairs, finding things to do to avoid going backstairs to your books, you sit down on your bed and lay back.

You think about what you want to say to Sam, or more of what you need to say.

You decide you're going to talk to him. Right now. You get up, and walk down the steps to find Colby sitting alone on the couch.

"Where's Sam?" You look around as you walk over to Colby. He looks up at you, "Said he was going for a run."

You look at the clock, "it's almost ten pm?" You furrow your brows, Sam usually never goes on late night runs like this, "Is he okay?"

A smirk grows on Colby's face and you point, "No. no. Don't even."

He holds his hands up, "My lips are sealed." You roll your eyes and look at your books, hoping to change the subject, "Can you just help me study for a little bit?"

He sighs and sits up, "Fine."

An hour goes by and Colby went up to work on some editing, leaving you alone in the kitchen as you worked on making yourself a snack.

You whispered questions to yourself, answering them, then celebrating when you got the right answer.

You hear the door open and Sam walks in, freezing slightly as he wasn't expecting you to be up, "Oh, hey."

"Hey." You smile and turn back towards your book, "How was the run?"

He shuts the door, shrugging as he sets his phone and headphones on the counter, "Not what I expected really."

"You want to talk about it?" You go back to putting peanut butter on your banana slices and he walks over, looking over your shoulder as he reaches around and takes one, "i don't know how to talk about it."

You nod slowly, "I know that feeling."

He leans against the counter, "We've been friends for a while, y/n."

You glance over at him, a small smile resting on your lips, "Longer than a while, Sam." He chuckles and nods, "a lot longer than a while."

You set your knife down, licking your lips as you work your the courage to ask what you want to ask most.

"What's going on in that head of yours?" Sam asks, reading you like an open book, "You can always talk to me. Or Colby. You know we both care so much about-"

"Do you have a girlfriend?"

He's taken aback slightly, "What?" He laughs and shakes his head, "No, no. I don't." He looks up at you, crossing his arms, "What makes you think that I have a girlfriend?"

You turn towards him slightly, "When I went up to get ready before my class.. I heard Colby tell you that you have to tell her, and I didn't.." you trail off, sighing as you close your eyes, "Nevermind."

Sam stares at you for a few seconds, "Oh.." he chuckles, "That.. yeah no.. that was about a girl who I've been talking to.." he follows up quickly, "..but not in the way you think."

You nod, your heart sinking slightly, "Ah, I see."

"Yeah, I have to tell her that I'm not interested in her." Sam tilts his head towards you, "She hasn't gotten the hint yet, and I don't want to be douche about it."

"Yeah, no of course not." You smirk slightly, "You're only mean to me." He laughs, "Well yeah, but you know what they say.." He sighs and leans over, taking another banana slice, "if a boy picks on a girl?"

You try to fight a smile, but you fail so you look down, "I've heard that saying before."

"Then you can probably put two and two together." He smiles at you as you look up at him, "I'm going to bed, we have to meet someone in the morning about the exploration."

"Maybe don't be up so late."

"Could say the same to you." He winks and jogs up the steps, leaving you to ask yourself, does Sam like me back?

.·:*¨ ✘ ¨*:·.

Over the next few days, the energy between you and Sam was different.

You felt drawn to him.

And he felt drawn to you.

You looked at him with so much love, and lust. You needed Sam, now. It felt like you were aching for him, but after the kinda, yet not-so cryptic conversation you had with him the one night, you just weren't sure what was in store for you and Sam.

You've been flirty, almost feeling like you and Sam were closer. You would pass each other and his hand would land somewhere on your body, usually your lower back, and it would send a shock up your spine.

"Morning." You say walking down the steps, "How'd your investigation go?"

"Sam, why don't you show her the footage?" Colby says nudging Sam's arm. He takes a deep breath, "I don't think.."

"You're coming back with us tomorrow night. That's all I'm saying." Colby holds his hands up, shaking his head and you look at Sam, pointing to Colby, "What's he talking about?"

He licks his lips and sighs with a smirk, "Come on. I'll show you." You nod, following him back up the stairs, "Did it go good?"

You follow him into his room and sit on his bed as he sits in the chair infront of his computer, "It was a loving spirit, basically, so yeah, it went good."

You lean forward slightly, eyes on Sam as he clicks on things. A shy smile grows on his face, "I know you're not looking at the computer."

He slowly turns his head towards you and you keep your eyes on him, "So what if I wasn't?" He cocks his jaw to the right as he smirks, "Never said it was a bad thing." He nods towards the computer, "Come here."

You stand up, moving over to stand next to him. You press your hand on the desk and lean down slightly, watching as he presses play.

You can tell he's watching you, but he's waiting for your reaction.

"Can you repeat that for us please?" Sam asks on the video. After a few moments, you hear your name, clear as day and it wasn't from either one of the guys, "What the hell?"

You look at Sam and he holds his hand up, "Just wait."

You look back at the screen, "Something moved in that doorway." You lay your finger on the screen and Sam leans forward, "What? No way."

"Rewind it... yeah.. there stop." You glance at Sam and nod towards the screen, "Now watch." He presses play, eyes on the screen and he leans back, eyes wide, "How did we miss that?"

You laugh slightly, "I don't know."

He watches in shock, "Why don't you ever come with us anymore?"

You hoped this question wouldn't ever be asked. 

"School, you know that Sam." You look at him quickly before reaching for the mouse to hit play, but he stops you, "That's the fake, I don't want to talk about it reason. Tell me the real reason."

You stand up, letting out a quiet sigh, "I just didn't want to get in the way." He tilts his head, "In the way of what?"

You shrug, unsure of what to say.

"Is it the comments? About us, and what people think we are?" Sam crosses his arms and looks up at you. You laugh nervously, giving him a nod, "I guess so."

He chews on his lip, "Uh huh." He smirks and leans forward, "Well they'll have a hay day with this." He clicks play and pulls you to sit on his thigh.

You lean forward, listening to Colby speak on the video, "What does y/n have to do with this?"

".. Sam .. it's time .."

You furrow your brows, continuing to listen to the video,

"Sam.. Sam.." you see Colby grab Sam's arm and Sam looks terrified, "Colby.."

"Sam.. she's a good spirit.. she's made it known she doesn't want to hurt anyone." Colby assures him, "you think she's telling you that you need to tell her?"

"Tell who what?" Sam shoots back and you look back at him. He's resting his chin on the palm of his hand and you look back at the screen.

"Y/n.. tell y/n that you like her more than you're letting on, man." Colby's voice is low, almost like they tried to keep it a secret but forgot the camera was rolling?

"Yeah, yeah. You're probably right, Colby.. I just.. how do they know that?" Sam is confused, "I just don't.. oh my god.."

"... together..."

"Should y/n and Sam be together?" Colby asks, "If you say yes, make that little light go off for us." Instant light and Sam pauses the video, "Lady Zeroni was known as a match maker back in her day but it turned deadly when a man who wasn't happy with the person she chose for him came back and went on a total murderous rampage throughout the entire house."

You lean back slightly, "So what you're saying is..." you laugh slightly and rest your hand on the top of his chair, "A ghostly matchmaker is saying we should.. what? Be together?"

Sam stares up at you, "The whole time, I kept thinking about you. Here alone. Like we don't know what we deal with sometimes and when your name is said, my immediate thought was you in danger and I just.."

You listen as he trails off, "When I asked about you having a girlfriend, I was scared you were going to ask me to move out because of how I feel about you."

"Wait.. how do you feel about me?" He tilts his head and tries not to smile and you laugh, putting your hand over his face, "Shut up."

He takes your hand off his face and holds it gently in yours, playing with the ring that's on your middle finger, "I'm scared as hell to want you.." his voice is quiet, "But here I am.." he looks up at you, "..wanting you anyway."

You look up at him quickly and your eyes meet his, "I know that feeling, too." He smirks slightly, letting out a breath of air, "We've been friends for a wh-" he stops himself, smiling as he corrects his words, "We've been friends for our whole lives basically, and I just.."

"Don't want to ruin the friendship?"

He nods, "Exactly."

You nod, "Since we're being honest.. I don't know when it happened, but all I know is that you're the first person I run to when I'm scared, happy, sad, anything." You tilt your head, "I mean, when we're doing a video, I run to Colby too, but mainly because he's close, but everything is just..  it's just very different with you."

"You look at me way different than you look at Colby, I know that for a fact. Actually, Colby was the one who brought it to my attention and I honestly tried pushing it off because I wasn't sure if it was too weird.. like we've known each other for so, so long and we've reached that max level of comfortability with each other... it's just.."

"It's a real amazing thing, Sam. Not many people, or should I say, many people would kill to have the type of relationship we have." You run your hand through his hair, and he closes his eyes, "Lacey told me that best friends don't look at each other the way we do."

His eyes flutter open and he smiles, "Colby told me the same thing."

"And I read the comments on our videos, and I just didn't want you guys to stop getting views or have your name being drug through the mud because we were being too touchy with each other."

He pulls you closer, "Your safety is my number one priority during those and if me keeping an arm around you while we're in some sketchy ass haunted house makes you feel secure, then I'm going to do it."

You smile, laying a hand on his chest, "I may have overthought a lot of it."

He nods, "Oh me too, one hundred percent."

He runs his bottom lip under his teeth, "I've been waiting years to do this." He slides his hand up, pulling you in so he can press his lips gently to yours.

Your hand moves to his cheek as you deepen the kiss and he pulls back, scanning over your face as a smile forms on his lips, "Now that I think about it, we'd make a great couple."

You tilt your head and scrunch up your nose, "You think so?" He pulls you in to kiss you, mumbling against your lips, "Know so."

You hum against his, "You know what else?"

"Hmm?" He tilts his head back to rest against his chair, looking up at you as he waits for you to tell him.

You stand up, his hands still on your hips, "We know everything but one thing about each other."

He raises an eyebrow, "Oh yeah? What's that?"

You slide your hands to his, "Come on." He stands up, following you over to his bed, instantly picking up what you're laying down for him, "Mm. Are you sure?"

You turn around, slipping off your sweatshirt, "You have no idea how long I've thought about getting you into bed, Golbach."

He chuckles as he slips his own shirt off, "I think I have an idea, y/l/n." His hands lay on your hips and he gently sits you down on the bed.

You lay back as his body moves over top of yours, his hips resting perfectly between your knees. It's like you were made for each other.

"Tell me what you want, babe." Sam's voice is low as he moves to kiss down your neck, "I'm all yours now."

You felt a wave of calmness wash over you before you take his hand and slide it to your throat, "Prove it."

He smirks with a slight hesitation before slowly tightening his grip, "As you wish." His lips crash into yours, kissing every once of skin he can as he makes his way down to the top of your sweats.

He bites your waist band, looking up at you as he lets them snap against your skin with a smirk following the release, "Can I take these off?"

"You don't have to ask." You go to sit up and take them off, but he presses a hand flat to your chest, "Let me, do it baby."

You bite your lip, nodding as you lay back down.

His hands slide up your clothed thighs, squeezing them before slipping his fingers between the band and your skin, "I want to take my time with this."

You needed him now, but you understood.

"Okay, baby." You whisper and smile down at him, lifting your hips as he tugs your sweats down. His lips part slightly, leaning little open kisses up your legs.

He moves back up, hovering over you he grinds against you, "You have no idea how many times I've thought about you.." he leans down and kisses you, "Thought about you."

You smile, "I relate."

He kisses down your neck, "When you came down wearing one of my hoodies, I wanted to make you so late for class."

"Would have been worth it."

He smiles and brushes hair from your face, "Fuck, why'd we wait so long?" You shrug, "Good things take time, Sam."

He smiles and looks from your lips to your eyes before leaning down to kiss you. He rolls over and you follow, straddling him as your lips reconnect with his. You grind down on him, low moans escaping the seal of your lips on one another.

"Please." You whimper out, "I need you."

Sam grips your neck, squeezing slowly, "Say it again."

Your lips form into a smile, and you whimper. "I need you."

He sits up, wrapping his arm around your back, "You're so fucking beautiful." His lips press to yours, moving slowly as he uses his arm to make your body move.

You wrap your arm around his neck and grind down, moaning his name quietly. He leans back, "lay down for me."

You move and lay on your back, watching as Sam strips the rest of his clothes off, "Take them off for me." He nods towards your panties that are still on your body and you comply by taking them off and kicking them off the bed.

"You know, I've also thought about being between those legs.." he gets on his knees, moving towards the middle of the bed by your feet, "multiple times actually.. I was so close to pulling you into the bathroom at that party we went to last week and getting on my knees for you.." his eyes move up your naked body with a smirk, "You looked so fucking good."

Your heart skips a beat, remembering that, even in your drunken state at the time, Sam wouldn't stop looking at you.

"You should have." You whisper watching as he kisses up your legs, alternating sides with each kiss, "I wouldn't have minded."

"Trust me, the next party we go to, I'll make it happen." He winks before dipping his head down and taking your clit between his lips. You let out a gasp, laying a hand on the back of his head, "Sam!"

Your fingers tangle in his hair, pulling slightly as you arch your back, "Oh god, yes." You moan as you grind your hips against his face, whining out how good it feels.

His tongue sinks into you and you pull his hair, causing him to groan against you. Your other hand searches for something else to grab for leverage.

His hand throws your leg over his shoulder and your heel instantly digs in to pull him closer, "Fuck, Sam. Sam. I'm so close."

His fingertips dig into your skin, pinning you down as his tongue works its magic inside of you.

Your eyes roll back and your back lifts up off the bed as he brings you to orgasm, "Shit shit shit." You moan out, "Fuck."

He pulls away, immediately coming up to kiss you. His cock rubs against your pussy and you reach down, rubbing it up and down your soaked slit a few times before he pushes his hips forward, his cock slipping inside of you for the very first time.

You both moan, clinging to each other in anyway you can.

He slowly pulls out and slowly slides back in, taking in the feeling of you, "Fuck, you feel so good."

"S-Sam.." you press your chest to his, "Fuck me. Please."

He smirks and tilts his head, watching your face twist with the best pleasure you've ever received, "Fuck, yes." Your nails dig and drag up his back, "I love you."

Sam leans up, stopping his thrusts as he looks at you. Your face goes shocked, "I-I don't know where that ca-"

"He smiles and leans down to kiss you, "I love you more than words can say."

"Then show me." You say quickly before you press your lips to his, "and you don't have to be gentle with me anymore, Sam."

He smirks and shakes his head, "You're fucking perfect." His lips crash into yours and he pushes his hips all the way into you, moaning lowly against you.

He slides a hand down your body and hooks his arm under your knee. He pulls it up and the new angle causes you to gasp, "Fuck."

He starts out thrusting slow, but quickly builds up to a faster, punishing pace. He tilts his head back, moaning before looking down at you.

He sits up slightly and reaches his hand down to cup your chin. His thumb slides across your bottom lip and you part them instantly.

He watches as you take his thumb between your lips, hallowing out your cheeks as you suck. He groans lowly, "I'm never going to get tired of you in this position."

You smile, teeth gently biting down on his thumb and he takes a sharp breath, "Oh yeah. Never getting tired of you in general."

He pulls his hand away and lays beside you. You automatically roll over, straddling him to ride him. You tilt your head back with a moan as his cock slides back inside of you.

His hands immediately grip your hips and help guide you up and down, "Fuck." His eyes are glued to his cock disappearing inside of you, "Doing so good, baby."

Your eyes light up at the praise and he raises his eyebrows, "Like a little praise do we?" He pulls his bottom lip between his teeth, "You're full of surprises aren't you?"

"You have no idea, Mr. Golbach."

He sits up slightly, "But I will."

He bends his legs up and your hands press to his knees as you bounce up and down, "Gonna cum." You whimper out as you slide all the way down and roll your hips, cursing out as you cum.

Sam is in awe of you, his eyes are moving all over your face, your body, "That's it, baby. Good girl."

Your eyes snap open and you lean down, kissing him as you move your hips up and down, "Only for you."

"Say.. say it again." He drags his fingers up your leg, "Please."

"A good girl, but only for you."

He flips you so you're back to being on your back and he's on top, thrusting into you, "Fucking right."

You smile, moaning out as you wrap your legs around his waist, "Fuck, fuck yes."

"M'so close." He mumbles into your neck, "Fuck. You're so good to me."

His thrusts slow down and turn kinda sloppy as he gets ready to break the grasp of your legs locked around him.

He pulls out to cum on your stomach and you lay there breathing heavy. He lays beside you, kissing your shoulder for a few seconds before standing up to grab you something to wipe off with.

He comes back, hanging you a towel with a smile. You take it from him and smirk, "What?"

"You're my girlfriend." He smiles and bites his lip, quietly celebrating. You tilt your head, "And you're my boyfriend." You smile at him and wipe up, tossing the towel on the floor before being met with a Sam laying his body over yours, "Should we go break the news to Colby?"

You sigh, "I can picture his celebration dance already."

Sam peppers kisses all over your face, getting you to laugh, "You're so cheesy." You turn your head, pecking his lips, "One of my favorite things about you."

He smiles and tucks your hair behind your ear, “You.. are my favorite thing about me.”

.·:*¨ ✘ ¨*:·.

Likes and reblogs are appreciated!

[joocomics]

screamed and jumped for joy when u followed me just now LMAOHDJD but ty for the tips!! i'll definitely keep them in mind! music is definitely a must, i think i just need to find some better music to listen to and i need to just really get in the zone and allow myself to get lost in my writing. i think i'll maybe go sit outside with my computer tomorrow and try to write bc i think im just wayy too scatter brained to actually think properly and it just makes it so so much harder 😖 so i'll definitely have to try some things out!!

now for a jooyeon thought! i saw ur post about him with face slapping and it got me thinking!! i feel like he's the type to really bounce off of his partner during sex, the type of mood or vibe that you're on is the type of mood or vibe that he's in. he gets rough sometimes, holding ur hips down as he thrusts into u sharply and i feel like he'd end up finding that he also has a thing for face slapping.. like if u and him are bickering and it ends up turning into sex i feel like if you reached up and slapped him because you're just so pissed at him, something mean sliding off your tongue through moans he'd reach right back down and slap you back, telling you that he's gonna ruin u for that, the frustration just building up in his stomach,, i feel like he also has a thing for like very in the moment sex,, like he doesn't even bother to get fully undressed like he'd be holding onto your skirt or your shirt or whatever he can to help him hold ur hips in place idk 😖😖 idk if any of that was even coherent but jooyeon isn't a want anymore,, he's a need 😞😞 (also i miss long hair white streak jooyeon so so much 💔)

OF COURSE ILY!! writing outside sounds soo nice 🤌🏼 is the weather sunny? ~ hope you have a great writing day tmrw!! sometimes getting in the zone takes some time, but when you finally get into it it’s the best feeling ever 😩

it’s no surprise jooyeon is obsessed with boxing - he likes letting out his stress and frustrations through hits, and it’s really messing up with my brain 😣 just simply imagining how strong his hand would be around your throat, on your jaw or when it’s pulling your hair makes me DIZZY. let’s not forget how a while back the members shared that none of them can beat him at arm wrestling, and NOW after he picked up boxing?? what’s his strength like now?? DON’T TELL ME

i agree SO much with everything you wrote, he can really match your energy very well and bc of that i think he’s pretty chill with trying out anything you might be interested in. OH he would be SO turned on from face slapping especially if you do it first to him, before he’s ever done that to you… he would be stunned but in the best way possible. he’d instantly pin your wrists down pounding into you even harder, even deeper so he can make you choke on your mean words; get you to shut up when the last thing you want is for him to have the last word. however, a moment later he’d release your hands and trace his lips on your neck all the way up to your ear, “do it again, i dare you”

choking and face slapping (giving + receiving) are two big turns on for him and no one can change my mind ☝️ he also loves slapping your pussy like sometimes he prefers it over smacking your ass as a punishment or even just for the funsies

(i love long hair white streak joo, but ngl my fave is his brown hair so i’m kinda thriving rn you have no idea how badly i wanted its return ❤️‍🩹)

[justalexisfine]

🍄-(how did you get your system name?)

👾(funniest out of context system quote?)

🔦(how did you discover your system?)

🪐(what is headspace like for you?)

also we feel so bad yall had to scroll so far down bc we have the link to the ask game saved in our notes and coulda gave it 2 yall ;A;/gen/lh

-Izu,Link+mirage(it is l u r k i n g)

ahhh it's fine! we didn't have to scroll down that far, really /gen, pos, lh

🍄- how did you get your system name?

Well, one of our most prominent memories as a wolf/monster was in a court, and it was a traumatizing memory, I think (so basically we're retaliating against the trauma [I think]). also, we love the stars, and we all agreed that we are stars/take care of stars in some way, shape, or form!

👾- funniest out of context system quote?

Jinx: "Hey, I can flirt! Watch this: hey baby, are you- I. wha. hm. lemme try that again. hey baby, are you a. wait a minute uh"

Jace, while Jinx is still trying to 'flirt' in the background: "Good job 👍"

🔦- how did you discover your system?

well, it was more like a realization than anything. faint voices in my head telling me what to do and fighting over critical choices? not normal (but I thought it was). feeling like I was being controlled sometimes (we've come to the conclusion that im always stuck in front or co-front)? not normal. that's when I started interacting with the system community, and it just kinda clicked. they just showed up one day, and since my experience wasn't like everyone else's (and the possibility that our median has formed out of something "bad" or "not valid"), I kept quiet.

🪐- what is the headspace like for you?

okay, so since we've come to the conclusion that I'm always stuck in front and/or co-front, Sonne decided to explain what it's like for all of them. so let me break it down under the cut:

Front room: a cluttered space that's more like an office/extra room/art studio. there are bookshelves to store the latest retained information and a computer (on a desk) that we think my inner body is connected to. There are multiple blankets strewn about and an overall cozy vibe to it. There's a window with a wonderful view of The Forest, as well as a few plants hung on the ceiling right in front of the window. Sometimes it's raining. Sometimes, it's sunny. Sometimes, it's storming. But we think the weather is connected to my mental state at the time. There's a dark wood door leading out into the hallway.

Hallway/Rooms: There's a hallway leading to more rooms and such. The hallway is connected to more hallways and a few staircases, as well as a basement. There's a living room (at the end of the hall. It doesn't have a door and just opens up to the living room), a closet, a soundproof closet (for medianmates to just scream into the void. it's dark in there, but calming), and a kitchen that opens to a dining room. A staircase, which leads to everyone's rooms, is straight across from the front room's door. There's a garden in which Yarrow likes to reside, and it's also part of the forest.

The Forest: a foggy forest that seems to be infinite. It surrounds the mind (which is apparently some sort of victorian house thing that's fluid in appearance) and is supposedly dangerous. Medianmates go there when they want to be dormant, in which Yarrow leads them through to the ruins, which is where the medianmate is left to be at peace. It's thick and dense with both fog and nature.

The memory room: a void that changes its appearance daily and is Jace's 'room'. He sorts our memories by holographic panels that float around him (think of Miguel oharas screens but portable and always stay near him). He doesn't let anyone in his room unless he wants to show them a memory.

The Abyss: a void-like detention that's just black and provides peace and stability for the medianmate who was sent there to unwind and calm down. The Abyss is controlled by Yarrow.

The rest is foggy since Sonne didn't explain the rest, but that's kinda all I know about it. /gen, lh

Thanks for asking btw:] /gen, pos

[cerealmonster15]

a bit of both- I was too scared to go off anon cuz I would've been embarrassed if I was wrong 😭

They INVENTED divorce. You get it.

And I DONT MIND YOUR THOUGHRS ARE SO SILLY!! pls invitation to come back on stage and scream about the guys ever 🥺

ksjdlfdsklfj I Understand 🙏 i hope it is ok that i took this message as an excuse to Continue Going Wild

head empty only tiny guy doodles now

while i was doodling i remembered ruggie and silver both have a vignette with jade where Food Is Involved... im obsessed w/the one where jade gives his mushrooms to the cafeteria bc azul and floyd banished them, and silver has them the next day and is like This Is The Best Risotto Ive Ever Had In My Life. and jades just watching him like 👁️👁️ and theres the one where ruggie accidentally takes jades ingredients and is like OH SHIT DONT KILL ME here i'll teach you a cool recipe!!!! i love how often these boys bond over food actually.... ruggie helped kalim cook in another vignette... jade and kalim talked about tea [and then jade died bc kalim uses too much sugar LOL]

more rambling and screen shots i have to go bonkers or i will die

oh my god and the second tsum event. theres the cutest little rythmatic of jamil kalim floyd and azul in the kitchen with tsums 😭😭😭 i want the second years to have a potluck........

ALSO i love in the first volume of the twst anthology, chapter 13 where it basically turns into the second years coming together and trying to help silver stay awake and hanging out EXCEPT THE FISH ARE NNNNOT INVITED!!! or like. theyre just not in that story fdslkjfds and jamil just shows up at the end..

KALIM'S SO CUTE HE'S SOOOO EXCITED He just JUMPS IN like OH DID SOMEONE SAY FRIENDSHIP STUDY GROUP???????

also

why did he do that. he was talking about riddle and they literally got riddle involved bc ruggie suggested it but here's the thing!!! silver is the one that needed notes bc he fell asleep. kalim joined up and was like lets study together and have a feast!! so ruggies like oh hell yea im in it for the food. why did he decide riddle needed to be there 🤔 i mean maybe he did actually want to study and/or didnt wanna be the one suckered into leading the study session LOL but. i think it kinda just looks like he wants to hang out with riddle jflsjeklkj like he literally later says "but im here for the feast" so WHY did you get RULES ABIDING RIDDLE involved HMMM??? watching you ruggie bucchi.

theyre literally SO cute i LOVE the anthology mangas SO MUCH and i really wish they'd make a third one!!!

god i actually. forgot a lot about this one LOL there's a lot of cute moments w/them 😭

ALSO now that im at my computer i could search better and i FOUND THE POST where i talked endlessly about riddle/floyd. i still stand by all of that. and theres cute anthology moments in there too.

third year divorce jumpscare while im in the anthologies

i love them theyre so fucking funny. also why are there So Many Times in game where vil basically says "yeah leona is extremely physically attractive HOWEVER his personality sucks and i hate him." like okay. why do you have to keep telling us that leona has a "pretty face" or "only good for his looks" or whatever it is he says fjsdkljekl. that's nice vil.

pushing them back out of the way back to the second years

and trey. im still trapped in the anthologies since thats whats in front of me klfjlewjsdfjkls god the way this one takes place after jamils meltdown and hes like "omg trey senpai....... and jade 😒........" Get His Ass sdfdsfg god i dont have a screenshot rn but another top 10 moments of twst for me that made me cry laughing was when i was reading cater's union bday card and jamil asks him that interview question "which dorm would you pick if you werent in heartslabyul" and god the TIMING with cater saying octavinelle INSTANTLY making jamil SCOWL IN DISAPPROVAL at the SHEER MENTION OF THE FISH BITCH DORM is SO funny to me. EW. GROSS. DISGUSTING!!! i so badly want riddle and jamil to bond over their mutual fish hading sjdklfe theyre SO FUNNYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

and yet in masquerade event. jamil bullies azul. azul buillies him back. they DANCE TOGETHER IN BOTH OF THE RHYTHM GAMES. theyre DUO PARTNERS to azuls ssr. riddle and jamil compliment [more or less LOL] azul's singing performance at the end. i think once or twice riddle and jamil also share a few 😑😑 moments over azul... being azul jdkslfjkdsljf and it's EVERYTHING TO ME it was so validating bc i think those three should hang out forever.

OK THAT'S ENOUGH DISORGANIZED RAMBLES FOR NOW I GOTTA CONTAIN MYSELF!!!

[manonamora-if]

i dont know if u feel up for it to answer but like... how do u handle negative comments and ratings and just people being negative about ur stuff? bc i have someone just being rude in comments or like notes and game folders on itch and its making me want to just delete everything and never show anyone anything anymore. or even have an acocunt on itch either.

Hi Anon,

I'm sorry you've been dealing with this, and that it took me so long to answer. I've been thinking about this for a while honestly. I've been writing a bunch of drafts for this one, because my answer seems to change with the day or my mood. Some of my stuff have had some strange interactions lately that's made me question whether I should stay on itch myself. I mean, I don't think I'll ever leave... there are too many fun jams I want to participate and, you know, to force people to play my weird stuff. But I've been more anxious about new stuff or updates I share recently.

I don't blame you for wanting an out. Some users will poison one's experience of a platform, that even opening the site would give them anxiety. It doesn't take much to have events or projects soured. Often, just a few rude words is enough to make accounts disappear without a word. And many platform don't have good safety nets (blocking, moderation, reports) to temper or avoid these situations. Many will have half-ass solutions that, at the end of the day, still allows interactions from blocked users. It's easy to wonder if all of this is worth it...

Anyway, the very boring and short answer to your question: it depends.

The probably as boring and long one is a bit of a ramble:

It depends on the day, or the mood I have. It's easier to deal with comments when I'm confident and things are going find; but I'd feel more hurt or have a harder time dealing with them when I'm a bit more morose (I think most people feel this way). I'll disregard any (even barely) negative points some days, only to take it into consideration a few days later. <- this especially during jam/comps time, just need time to digest criticism of any kind.

It also depends on the content of the comment, their tone, and intent of the commenter. Not all negative comments are on the same level. I've had negative comments in the past where the commenter was genuine, and really gave my stuff a shot, bringing interesting points or important concerns. And though it hurt a bit, because being told you made a mistake sucks, those helped me grow. But those are the good kinds of comments...

On the other hand, I try to disregard the trolls, and the abusive comments (towards my work or me), the ones where the engagement was clearly not done in good faith... you know, the ones who will literally tell me I've made the world worse by uploading my games on itch. Doesn't mean that it doesn't affect me at all*. Some of them really hurt or made me angry and frustrated, some have lingered for hours or days in my mind, a few made me close to delete stuff as well. Words are not just empty things without meaning... *I've had to block a few people both here and other places recently because of it, they had become so insistent on wanting to engage with me while bashing most of my work, my values or the few aspects of my identity that I've shared online.

It would be easy to say I just don't give them the time of day or any of my energy, or that I pretend they don't exist, because, if I do, then the trolls win. But that would be lying. Obviously.

Screaming to the void/a pillow or ranting to friends have helped get rid of my anger and frustration. I've laughed with others about some comments I got (usually the bad faith ones, some of them are funny in how sad/bad they were). I think what worked best for me was just turn off the computer and go outside for a bit. Or turned off the internet and play silly games on my phone. Or picked up a book. Or watch a movie. Essentially, any activity that would distract me from it and force me to take a break. And when none of this worked, because some trolls are just that insistent, blocking/deleting stuff*. *unfortunately, it's not always possible, see second paragraph again.

It does suck that you're kinda forced to grow a thicker skin to enjoy or even exist in those spaces, and I wish those would be friendlier... but I don't think social platforms/the internet is going in that direction anytime soon.

Maybe not super helpful to your decision, but borogove.io hosts IF games (without ratings or comments, though people can download the files), so does the IFDB through the IFArchive (but there are ratings/reviews there, also can be downloadable). I've seen other peeps host their stuff on neocities (no ratings/comments). None of those platforms are like itch, in the positives or the negative. Or just be old school, and email stuff.