#the soundtrack to something you haven't written yet

[clotpolesonly]

In The Habit Of Having You With Me

for the Stiles Shipping Central monthly exchange!! haven't done one of these in a while, lol, and haven't written for my beloved boys in even longer 🥺 back on my unrelenting fluff bullshit, sorry not sorry, hope you enjoy uwu | Sterek | 865w | Gen | Established Relationship | Mornings | Fluff | (also on AO3)

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Despite being a mythological creature largely associated with the nighttime, Derek had always been an early riser. The world was a noisy, noisy place, and early morning was the quietest it ever seemed to get. Especially when he was young, his large house crammed with an even larger family, the hour before dawn was the only option if he wanted to experience anything other than chaos, so he made it a habit to be the first one up. Call it the self-defense mechanism of the introverted middle child.

There was just something deeply peaceful about the stillness of it, the hush of a day before it’s properly begun, the slowness that precedes the scramble of business as usual.

Not to mention, he loved a good sunrise. The only thing better than standing on the porch in brisk fall weather to watch the sun rise over the treeline with a cup of good coffee in hand would be doing so with the love of his life at his side.

Unfortunately, it took a fucking forklift to get Stiles out of bed in the morning.

Most days, Derek would roll over somewhere around 6:20am with a yawn and a good, deep stretch. He would turn to gaze lovingly at his boyfriend and find Stiles face down in a pillow, completely unresponsive, snoring fit to wake the devil. He would nudge and poke and whisper and drop kisses on whatever part of Stiles he could reach. Stiles would mumble back something along the lines of “carrier twelve mirror dog” or “where’d you put the Gilligan” and fling an arm out in Derek’s direction like he was casting a fishing line. Sometimes this hit him in the face, sometimes it missed completely, and sometimes it successfully snagged Derek around the waist.

Derek liked that Stiles always wanted him close, so strongly that even his subconscious was always reaching out for him. It was endearing. Made Derek feel very loved.

However, it also prevented him from getting out of the bed. This made Derek feel very annoyed, especially when Stiles was of the opinion that “morning” didn’t begin until somewhere around 10am.

One would think that, as a werewolf, Derek would be able to extricate himself from his human boyfriend’s embrace without too much trouble, but, somehow, one would be wrong. Stiles had to have some kind of fucking were-octopus genetics in his lineage somewhere because some mornings, Derek came very close to having to chew his own arm off if he didn’t want to lie there, wide awake and affectionately trapped, for four hours. There were a lot of sacrifices that he was willing to make for Stiles, but four conscious, bed-ridden hours without coffee was not one of them.

And so Derek spent most mornings alone, on the porch of his newly rebuilt home, with his coffee and his sunrise and his silence.

It wasn't as nice as it used to be.

This particular one really was lovely, though, even if he'd had to pry himself regretfully out of Stiles’ grip to earn the privilege of seeing it. It painted the Preserve with pink and gold, a stunningly beautiful backdrop to match the charming soundtrack of the early birds cheeping to each other. There were no cars yet on the nearby road. Only the sounds of nature and—

“Cannot believe you do this every day.”

Before Derek could turn around, familiar arms wound their way around his waist. An equally familiar forehead thunked against the nape of his neck. Derek took one hand off the warmth of his coffee cup to cover Stiles’ where they clasped each other over his stomach.

“You're up,” he said. “You're never up.”

Stiles made a plaintive sound, cold nose nuzzling. “Missed you.”

Derek smiled. “Do you want some of my coffee?”

“Fuck no, I'm going back to sleep in, like, point-two minutes and you can't stop me.”

Derek's smile grew. “I wouldn't try.” 

He tapped at Stiles’ hands until he loosened his hold, then turned himself around without leaving the embrace. Stiles’ face was grumpy and bleary, pillow creases still marring his cheeks, and he only deigned to crack open one of his eyes. He was every bit as beautiful as the sunrise.

Derek kissed him. Stiles’ grumpy expression did not change, but he made another of those plaintive little noises when Derek pulled back. His fingers flexed against Derek's lower back, holding him tighter.

Derek said, “Thank you.”

“You better appreciate how much I love you, dude. I would not do this for literally anybody else.”

“I know.”

Derek turned back around and let Stiles adhere himself to his back. Within seconds, Stiles was snoring against his shoulder. Derek didn't mind. In a few minutes, he would rouse Stiles again and lead him back to bed. Derek might even join him there, read a book or something while Stiles used him as a teddy bear for another hour or two.

For the moment, though, he was excruciatingly content. The sun was shining, the birds were singing, the coffee was perfectly brewed, and the love of his life was—grudgingly—at his side. He'd been right. There really was nothing better.

[sungbeam]

𝐑𝐄𝐂𝐄𝐍𝐓 𝐅𝐀𝐕𝐎𝐑𝐈𝐓𝐄 𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐃𝐒!

HEY !! HEY YOU, YEAH YOU!! remember to give these authors and the fics all the love they deserve! if u liked what u read, reblog it or comment or send in an ask !! cool, ty <3

a/n: hihi everyone! again, i wanted to extend my appreciation to all my fellow writers with this post (ik it's not a lot compared to how much all y'all do 😔), but if you'd like more fic recs, pls do check out my other blog @luv-beam!

**NOTE: lol 🤡 i do apologize if my bias(es) show per group !! i love every member of every group but some rot my brain a little more than others 🤧😭 i also haven't done a lot of reading lately ,,, this is an accumulation of like three months

NCT

his same, old, safe bet (jeong jaehyun) — @jaehunnyy

not finished just yet but it's off to a brilliant start !! we love yn's "bitch who r u" attitude toward jae lmaoo

swiper no swiping (lee donghyuck) — @/xosimo (linked my rb bc they deactivated 😭)

I WAS SWOOOOONING like omg hyuck is so attractive pls and just the unfolding of events and the build up? yes.

inevitable (na jaemin) — @korijime

dude the vibes r so immaculate in this piece, like the soft sort of atmosphere and the low-key confession style mwah

SVT

11:23pm (kwon soonyoung) — @xuhuihuis / @.maiademia

okay i admit i'm a little obsessed w this (maybe cuz it was my request so i must promote) but it was also written so well and hoshi is so nOm

love on the air (hong jisoo) — @suhnshinehaos

joshua hong 😔✨ ugh such a romantic,, both of them r two idiots in love but isn't that one of the best tropes?

pocket money (choi seungcheol) — @ethereal-engene

found this realistic in a good way!! cheol would be so cute all flustered and he *would* catch non-carat eyes too no doubt 👀👀

the way seventeen breaks your heart (performance unit) — @moonsolie

broke my heart </3 into seventeen+ pieces </3 if i love angst, then this was my ride or die

i less than three you (xu minghao) — @junshine (they deactivated unfortunately :( but i'll link my reblog!)

although op deactivated, pls do continue to read and enjoy their work :') it was so well written and i loved it so much

"i'm here. it's ok. you can cry. i've got you." (kwon soonyoung) — @holdinbacksecrets

comfort to the max ; i cannot tell u enough how much i loved this like ,, oh god i found this when i was not in a good spot and it just made me feel ,, seen?

order up (yoon jeonghan) — @leejungchans

my love for trickster jeonghan is thru the roof 😔😭 this was so so cute (and funny watching jeonghan not get the reaction he wanted skcjdj)

vernon heist au (chwe hansol) — @freakyfriedrice

i LOVED the uncharted movie and to be blessed with this au ?! like dream come true omg i loved this beyond words ; flustered vernon >>>>

TXT : i'm sorry txtblr i was and am in a beomgyu crisis.

nap of a star (choi beomgyu) — @blue-jisungs

omg literally mE WHEN?! (´Д⊂ヽ soft moment to the soundtrack of clownery, my favorite </3 u know u like them gyu õ_ó

8:55pm (choi beomgyu) — @4ure2

dUUDE the imagery in this one? i felt so many things, and this man goes and says this 😔 denial fr but sighs ,, that's love ig

balance game (choi beomgyu) — @yeonjunszn

low-key down bad for this trope, like /bruh/ u like ur best friend?? own it?? ; also this is funny asf even tho beomyn r lichrally dumbasses 🤕🤕

2:37am (choi beomgyu) — @ijhyo

now THIS was simply UNCALLED FOR my heart cannot take this like goodbye. this is all i want.

SKZ

king candy (han jisung) — @petrichor-han

how can i not put this hanji fic on here õ_ó READ IT, it's so cute and a holiday staple for me atp

poisoned fangs (kim seungmin) — @petrichor-han

i have so much to read from rain's m.list and i don't often read like horror-ish things? but i thoroughly enjoyed this one (i also have a weird thing for morbid reads 🤡)

probably up (bang chan) — @loveliestfelix

why we love christopher bang chan (´Д⊂ヽ ugh there was something so warm, mellow, and comfortable about this one and the ambiguity of potential lovers was also super refreshing

6:26pm (bang chan) — @daydreaminskz

i've actually never seen this kind of situation written before, and tbh i'm so here for it like the domesticity and chan being cute as always (i'm sorry but i might have laughed when he fell 😭💀)

10:43am (lee minho) — @cleyellow-wood

i honestly really love how this was written, like there was something abt op's style and the way lino was portrayed as well that hits the spot

tag, you're it (lee felix) — @loveliestfelix

read the warning so u aren't too surprised, but u will still need a box of tissues ; literally sHivers from this one

ENHA : lmao let's not talk abt my jungwon brainrot either 🤡

you're mine (yang jungwon) — @goldenhypen

em's stuff always makes me like 2489292x more delulu that's a fact like it's short but too sweet i 😔

bookmark (park jongseong) — @crystalsoobin

so so dang cute — even if he did call reader a nerd ig 🤕🤕

kisses nonstop (yang jungwon) — @goldenhypen

this woman posted this on my birthday as if it would not sHOOT ME THRU THE HEART ?!? LIKE U EXPECT ME TO BE OKAY AFTER THIS??

closer (yang jungwon) — @palajae

tbh read this during physics and i am not ashamed bc it was so cute and the pacing was mwah and oh god yANG JUNGWON (´Д⊂ヽ

ATZ

midnight kiss (kim hongjoong) — @i-write-some-stuff

i love whump aus part 28472993 OP U WROTE HONGJOONG SO WELL AND SO AHHHHH

11:54pm (choi san) — @stayarmytinyzenmoa-l

i will say this again and again but this lives in my brain rent free and i need to stalk crys' masterlists once i have the time 😔

june+july fic recs

[nerdalmighty]

BG3 Tag Game!

I was tagged by @khywren!!! Thank you!!!!!!

I'm going to tag @vanilkaplays @okthisway @maladaptive-menace @riddlerosehearts @starkspi and anyone else who wants to play along!

Favorite romance: It will surprise no one to know that it's Astarion. I find his backstory so incredibly interesting and I love his dumbass personality. At the end of the day, he just wants to do whatever is the most hilarious and I adore that. I especially love how soft he gets when you get together in Act 2. I could go on and on but I'll never be able to fully articulate my love for him.

Favorite class to play: Bard! I love that they're really the jack of all trades and are pretty good at everything, including spells and sword fighting. Persuasion and deception are SO helpful in this game, plus playing music to distract crowds and cause shenanigans in Baldur's Gate is wonderful.

Favorite NPC: I think Raphael. While yeah he absolutely SUCKS, I'm obsessed with his obsession with his own voice. He's a thespian, he's a freak, he's an idiot. I love it. But yes, I did kill his ass.

Favorite song off the soundtrack: Probably the Harpy Song. I listen to it a lot in my spare time, especially when I'm working on a specific fic I'm attempting to write. I'm a big fan of haunting melodies and, unsurprisingly, the concept of hypnotizing music.

Tell us a little about your Tav: I wrote a pretty long post about her here, but my Tav is named Birdie and she's a bard who was born and raised at the Water Queen's House. Previous iterations of her had her as a siren (hence the deep love of the Harpy Song), but I'm still not 100% sure if this version of her is. Basically, she's a mermaid ass goof whose main gang of idiots include Astarion, Gale, and Shadowheart. Chaos often ensues.

Something you wish was in the game: I know this game is huge. I know there's probably stuff people haven't even discovered yet. But god would I love some more camp animations. More interactions between the companions AT camp. Cut scenes where there should probably be cut scenes (The second time Astarion drinks your blood, Wyll celebrating the defeat of Ansur, etc). I really really love this game, but I'd love to hang out with my friends EVEN MORE.

Do you create fanworks? Share something with us: Oh boy I'm TRYING. I've never really written fanfiction before but the stupid vampire has inspired me to do so. I'm in the process of writing two different fics (one multi-chapter, one one-shot on the longer side) and am having a blast but I'm not sure if/when I'll post them. I've noticed my writing style is very similar to the way I write scripts, which is what I went to college for, so they're full of dialogue and quick, dumb banter. It might not be for everyone, but I'm having The Most Fun! Let me know if you'd maybe want to see more? Here's a silly excerpt from the one-shot (she may or may not get smutty later on 👀):

There was no sign of the vampire, save for an open hatch beneath the stone of the tower leading into what you presumed was a cellar of sorts. Off to the side was a discarded set of Thieves’ Tools. Yup, that’ll be him.

Rolling your eyes affectionately, you began to descend into the basement below. 

Before you could even make it to the bottom, however, you heard Astarion’s voice tinged with annoyance. “Don’t bother, darling. I was just coming back up.”

You paused on the ladder and looked down at him. “That bad?”

“Eh, a few coins, some food. Nothing worth risking one’s life over. Foolish gnome.”

“Shame,” you pouted down at him, not an ounce of real sympathy behind the word.

He smirked as he met your eye. “Go,” he said, indicating you should climb back up the ladder. “There was a rather large amount of smoke powder though. That could be fun.”

When you emerged back into the early evening air, you turned to help Astarion out. “Maybe you can blow up a quaint little gnomish village.”

Astarion’s eyes glittered with delight. “Oh, do you think there’s one around here? That would be- Oh. You’re joking.”

You nodded.

“Gods, you’re no fun.” He sighed dramatically and then started back towards the Blighted Village proper. 

You scoffed in mock offense. “I’m a lot of fun!”

Astarion tsked. “If you have to say you’re a lot of fun, odds are, you’re lying to yourself.” He shot a challenging half smile at you from over his shoulder.

“How dare you,” you laughed.

“Such a pity, too,” he went on. “Aren’t bards supposed to be entertaining?”

You made a sound of agony, which had Astarion fully turning back to look at you. You threw a hand to your heart and staggered towards him. “You wound me, Astarion. Look upon me with pity and remember me fondly!” You set an arm on his shoulder and let your body weight go, as if collapsing from a killing blow. 

Astarion was quick to catch you under your arms. He made a show of groaning about how heavy you were now that your body had gone completely limp. After you’d hung loosely from his grip for a few seconds, he finally yielded. “Alright, enough.” 

You resumed control of your body and stood up straight, a smug look on your face. “I’m fun.”

“Dramatic.”

“Theatrical.”

“Annoying.”

“Endearing.”

“Loud.”

“Enthusiastic-”

Just then, a loud howl came from a barn a little ways off. 

You and Astarion eyed each other.

“Was that you?” Astarion asked.

“‘Was that me?!’ I’m not THAT loud.”

“Could have fooled me.”

You rolled your eyes. “Come on.” You started in a light jog towards the barn.

Astarion groaned. “You can’t be serious.” He caught up with you easily. “Haven’t we done enough heroing for today?”

You looked at him thoughtfully. “One more act of heroism probably won’t kill you.”

“It might!”

“Oh, now who’s being dramatic?” You came to a stop at the double doors.

“I-” Astarion floundered, then pursed his lips and crossed his arms.

“That’s what I thought.”

[sweetandgentlecreature]

use a photo on your phone camera roll and write a quick scene/hc for it

Ooh, how cute!! This was written on a day when the caffeine won, if that isn't already abundantly clear. Unedited and off the cuff. Gif isn't mine, but has been sitting in my camera roll for a hot minute. Message me for credit!

It was another beautiful morning in the garden of Eden. Last night's rainfall was but a memory now, as the sun shone brilliantly through the open windows of their humble abode. A nice breeze stirred the trees and ruffled the floral curtains in the study. Day two of tinkering on his latest project brought more of the same. Those tiny screws were driving him nuts as nimble fingers trembled to hold them still until they were secured into place. It was a peaceful repetition that he took pride in. He had the patience of a saint to sit hunched over the open tower, piecing together the perfect machine bit by bit, but it would be well worth it in the end.

From across the house, her soundtrack gave him whiplash. What started as today's latest hits transitioned to 90's boy bands, old country ballads, and everything in between. He couldn't help but chuckle as he listened to the tiny rave that took place in the kitchen, a party for one. Leaning back in his chair to take a peek down the hall, he caught glimpses of his little dj jamming out to Backstreet's Back as she buttered her toast. He'd been up for hours, long enough to get in a run and a shower, but her day was just getting started. Her hair was piled atop her head in a bun, messy and wild, and the shirt she'd stolen from his side of the closet billowed around her thighs as she swayed. In his moment of distraction, his hands slipped. The screw clattered against the hardware and disappeared down into a corner out of reach.

"Shit. Uh...Darling?" he called over the opening notes of Benny and the Jets. "Think I could get your help for just a moment?"

"Coming!" she called over her shoulder, took a bite of her breakfast, then wiped her hands on a paper towel. When she appeared in the doorway, she was a vision of natural beauty. No wonder Adam had been so tempted. Low hanging fruit is the sweetest. "Whatcha need, big guy?"

He turned the tower a bit and pointed down into it. "I dropped a screw down here. Would you mind to fish it out for me?" She laughed and nodded, moving to squeeze between him and the desk to try her hand at it. Delicate fingers felt through the intricate network of wires and cables in search for the tiny screw. The tip of her tongue poked out a bit as she searched blindly for it. Watching the focus on her face had him oddly aroused, and she didn't even flinch when his hands came up to brush along the smooth, supple skin of her thighs. He found himself distracted again with the line of her panties, when she called out in victory. Pinched between her thumb and forefinger, she held it up for him to see. "Got it!" To her surprise, he took it from her and discarded it into the small dish on the corner of his desk.

"What's wrong? I thought you wanted to finish this today."

He smirked, wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her down to sit in his lap. "Oh, I will. Watching you now, though, I've just remembered something."

Raising an eyebrow in suspicion, a playful smile spread across her face. Surely she was picking up what he was putting down. "Yeah? And what's that?"

When he kissed her, his intentions were made clear. "You're looking especially delicious this morning, and I haven't had breakfast yet."

He didn't pick up another screw until later that afternoon.

[musicalrecs]

Things I have learned/realized since engaging with the musical side of tumblr:

Teens still love musicals, and theater kids exist as they always have and always will. However, they prefer shows written during their own lifetimes and ideally featuring people (and humor) their own age.

The Hunchback of Notre Dame (Disney version) was released in America first, not Germany. (I'd heard the German recording and knew there wasn't a Broadway version so I thought whelp, guess Germans just really love the story but there were Concerns™ bringing it to America.)

There are even more shows I haven't heard of than I realized.

Some people really hate Lin-Manuel Miranda/Hamilton. :(

Some people really, really hate Miss Saigon.

The reason I always got Nautica and Danielle mixed up when listening to the Bring It On soundtrack is likely because when I saw the BIO tour, Ariana DeBose must have been playing Danielle (Nautica understudies the role) but still sang "It Ain't No Thing." This would explain why the track (and that one Youtube video) exactly matched the vocals I remembered and yet was surprised when I saw the second tour and Nautica a) was singing it and b) overall seemed to have a much more important role and bigger stage presence comparatively. (I thought it was just another thing changed as they worked on the book.)

Literally anyone can just license the rights to put on a show, even big popular ones (though there are embargoes on the latest hits that are still running or are on tour).

There are some really weird shows out there.

Some of the shows we take for granted are also pretty weird when you stop to think about it.

Tumblrites are more likely to like and reblog shameless promotion for a show they already know and love than something new to them.

There are a lot more shows with clips and even complete recordings on YouTube now than there ever used to be, even for very obscure titles.

No one knows what "a musical like Assassins" means exactly.

People really love piracy/slime.

[no0t2]

@checkadii

I literally just woke up so this is the worst time to post this but ngl I have this problem where I wanna talk about it but I blank so fucking hard and fall flat on my face that I end up not talking about it anyway out of sheer embarrassment.

I'm not good at structuring my thoughts properly either because of ADHD, but here goes I guess.

I usually gotta segway into the topic if it's relevant to the conversation usually via,, friend convo, I don't know how people do deepdives of characters and whatnot I can't do that. I'm not sure why that is, this always has been a thing for me where I've got some level of understanding and my own HCs and such but they're not written or anything, so I can't express them.

To me Postal is just a silly series (minus P1 and Redux), not to be taken too seriously. So I don't really think about the "lore" that it has so much. I can ramble about Postal: Brain Damaged tho, that's probably my favourite cos of gameplay... And the designs as well as the soundtrack. It's just such a good game, I never thought shooters would ever be a genre I'd like to play, as I was so against playing them (thanks Half-Life for opening up my eyes). I can say definitely with confidence that retro styled FPS are especially something I find fun? Not on intense difficulty or anything either, I usually can't go above normal.

I've listened to "Straight Outta Suburbia" for like over an hour straight, I'm pretty sure even during while I was drawing one of my BD sketches lol

Back to Postal in general, I frankly haven't done enough "research" on it where I can properly speak about it aside from the games I've played (P1, P2, Paradise Lost and P:BD) And they're all games that are super different from each other (aside from P2 and PL, but even then). I'd also say I'm still pretty new to the series, speaking as I haven't played all of the games yet. Frankly, I was planning to just stick to P2 and that's it, glad I didn't.

Postal 1 I remember making me feel all sorts of weird things when I both played it and after I finished it. The load up intro scared the shit out of me the first time I opened the game, to where I had to pause for a minute. And it kept spooking me each time I did open it. I think that was kinda the point of the game as it's pretty dark compared to it's counterparts. I won't get into the lore of the 1st Dude cos I've seen people pluck at each other's feathers over the interpretation of him. But essentially, guy looses his shit during an episode, starts killing everyone. (Or just, "hostiles", depends how you play the game.)

P2 is so wildly different (aside from the fact that you can shoot people) that when I first opened it I was so confused how I was met with THAT Dude. I was surprised to hear him talk more beyond than just "BLEED" or "Only my weapon understands me". At the time I was also wrangling personal fears and feelings(which I don't know if I wanna get into, let alone if people would even wanna hear it lol) over playing the Postal series, so my initial expectation towards the game was:

"Okay, I know this is going to have some offensive shit in it, there's parts that won't be fun probably." And hoped for the worst, surprisingly a lot of the stuff in it I didn't find that bad, most of it is definitely fucked up, but nothing I couldn't handle, surprisingly. I played neutral-y, so I only attacked whoever attacked me, but I'd bail if I had the chance.

Paradise Lost plays similarly to Postal 2 (as it's literally the same branch of game just in the form of DLC). But I've found myself enjoying it way more than Postal 2, mostly cuz I found some of the jokes in it actually funny.

P3 I haven't played because I got rick rolled by RWS on the website so I'm not gonna play it out of spite </33 (But I've seen gameplay)

Postal: Brain Damaged is like, even more different than the previous entries as it's a retro styled shooter. But it has the charm of a Postal game and MAN is it good, I think the fact that it was released more recently is what made me enjoy its humor more. And it just!! Is so fun in general like wow, I'm still processing playing the game and I've already been thinking of replaying it because of how much I've enjoyed it. Definitely recommend trying it out.

AND WOWWW this has gotten long oops. Sorry.

I wanna note tho that, although there are aspects of Postal I enjoy, there's a lot of them that I don't, namely the offensive bits, some of them are genuinely fucked up where I can't go past them even in a comedic sense. Which I think is OK. I still enjoy other parts of it :^]

[limayde]

72. Little Goody Two Shoes

Coming off the heels of Pocket Mirror GoldenerTraum earlier this year, I was very excited to see that LGTS would be releasing so soon after it. I quite enjoyed my time with Pocket Mirror, it wasn't my favorite RPG horror game, but it did have a lot of what I was looking for from the genre, so it quenched my thirst for a time.

That being said, Little Goody Two Shoes is LEAGUES better than Pocket Mirror ever was. I had only found out recently that PM's story was written on the fly as they developed the game, and while that method can work in some situations, I don't think it quite worked for Pocket Mirror. It did, however, do wonders for Little Goody Two Shoes.

Somehow, the lore they crafted specifically for Pocket Mirror works a million times better in LGTS. Rather than being drip fed Elise's story in Pocket Mirror, you get to play out her journey—see everything she went through, and it's just so good.

The overall gameplay is a huge step up as well. There's a whole life sim aspect during the day, with people to talk to, mysteries to solve, and minigames to play. During the night is when the game most closely uh...mirrors Pocket Mirror. It's you usual RPG horror game—something I'm quite fond of—with puzzles, enemies to avoid, and things to collect. It's still a formula I quite enjoy, even long after the RPG horror craze has passed. But there was one "puzzle" in the crow woods that I just fucking LOATHED. There were these shaking trees and birds that would pop out and peck you if you did the wrong thing. But I never figured out what the "right thing" was no matter what I tried. So I just ended up bolting through and tanked the damage. Terrible. I hated it. Thankfully that's the only part about the game I genuinely did not like.

The game isn't really all that scary (barring the serpent woods), but what I felt beyond that was this deep-seated dread. I knew what happened in Pocket Mirror, I knew what was coming, and yet I was powerless to stop it. I just had to sit and watch as Elise ventured further and further into the woods... Okay well there's some alternate good endings as well, but we all know what the true ending is.

The addition of the dating subplot is actually ingenious. You get to know these girls, really understand them—all while you watch their romance blossom. But you still know what's coming. You know what you'll have to do. It really gets you to care about each and every one of them, to really savor every moment you get with them.

Also can I just add how funny it is that there are no male suitors? Like, that kinda shit never happens outside of yuri VNs or lesbian dating sims. Elise is a LESBIAN and there's nothing you can do about it.

Little Goody Two Shoes is a wonderful return to the classic RPG horror genre, with some modern touch-ups, a fantastic story, wonderful characters, GORGEOUS artwork, and a killer soundtrack—anime opening included! (More games should do that.) Absolutely recommend to those who love horror games, lesbians, or Pocket Mirror. Hell, even if you haven't played Pocket Mirror, it works very well as a standalone title.

[airenyah]

QL Wrapped 2023

i was tagged by @nongnaos and @ranchthoughts thank youuu <333

i meant to upload this at the latest by december 31st, but the thing is when i saw the tag i was a little overwhelmed at first bc i didn't know how to fill it out and then once i had it all written out i had a super hard time deciding on what to gif and then it all ended up taking soooo much longer than planned. and now it's already 2024. oops. well, better late then never...

so without further ado:

You watched 12 QLs this year that's about 264 hours!

(i'm counting only qls that started airing 2023 bc i didn't keep track of every single show that i watched and it's a lot easier to count all the 2023 dramas on mdl lmao)

You primarily only watched QLs from Thailand

i blame my bachelor thesis for this which i was writing on the translation strategies of thai to eng and also the fact that i'm learning thai, so any time i watch a series i'm like "do i watch something from a country other than thailand tonight??" only for a little voice in my head to go "yeah but you COULD be spending your evening practicing thai listening skills" so yeah...

You spent way too much time thinking about these characters: Pat Napat Jindapat

listen. LISTEN. i know ok, i know bad buddy is from 2021 not from 2023. however!!!!! bad buddy was part of our skyy 2 and that included my boy pat and so i'm counting it!!!! i'm always thinking about pat napat jindapat ok bye

no for real tho. i am NOT kidding when i say i have spent hours on end thinking about pat in the year of our lord 2023, two full years after the show dropped:

maybe in 2024 i'll finally sit down and write that meta that's been in my head for two years now

Your favorite show was Moonlight Chicken

it's gotta be the chicken show for me. yeah. it just felt so... idk, real in a way. idk how to explain it. i'm not even obsessing over mlc all that much but any time it pops into my head i go all kinds of 😭😭😭 and 🥰🥰🥰

not to mention the firstmix

the heartliming

and most importantly earth and fourth as an uncle/nephew duo??

i am so🥺🥺🥺

special shoutout also to jimbo the cat (left) who looks almost exactly like coco, my family's cat (right):

Another one of your favorites was Last Twilight

just. the way p'aof shows relationships on screen okay. yeah.

i cry

You are still stuck in this hallway:

yeah i've been thinking about the yank-kiss-yeet scene from hidden agenda and joke breaking down afterwards in that very hallway for 19 weeks straight gay. bye.

The soundtracks you listened to the most were:

(according to my spotify wrapped top 5)

Just Friend? (Bad Buddy)

Our Song (Bad Buddy)

น้ำลาย (My School President Cover)

Secret (Bad Buddy)

yeah. i've given up on the "only 2023 media" thing. if we're talking songs only from series released in 2023 then i've got love love love (our skyy 2) on no. 32 and no more empty nights (our skyy 2) on no. 46 on my spotify wrapped

also if you're wondering what the 5th song (on no.3 in reality) from my top 5 was that's missing above where i only mentioned four songs, well, it's none other than tilly birds' same page? which yeah. is also bad buddy related. surprise surprise 🤭

Your overall bl mood was P'Aof

You created 15 gifsets (of which "only" 1/3 were about making other shows about bad buddy)

you can find them here

You shazammed 295 royalty free background music pieces/songs from thai dramas

fun fact: i haven't mentioned this publically yet but since thai dramas keep using the same music over and over again in various series i've actually started collecting the different songs/pieces and i'm planning on making a side blog about it. i just want to go through some more dramas first before i publish anything. so this is something you can look forward to in 2024 dkjfkfdj

currently shazamming my way through bad buddy (you may have seen my blorbo breakdown about pran in the ep4 sleepover scene the other week that was triggered by me shazamming all of ep4). next on the list: theory of love and the eclipse. it takes ages tho, so don't expect it any time soon

Your favorite acting pair was JoongDunk

(is anyone even surprised by this lol)

no but for real whatever these two have going on, i'm intrigued:

i just. i love their energy ok. they're fun. and they're clearly having fun

i couldn't decide on what to gif so here's a little compilation bc fuck it, this is my post and i get to do whatever the fuck i want

(actually there's more that i could have put in there but i didn't wanna waste any more time with posting this tag game and also i was trying to keep the compilation somewhat short lmao)

they are such silly little idiot boys ("little" says the 155cm tall short person about the 180+cm giants 🤭) and i adore them &lt;3

their energy is essentially this meme and i'm so here for it:

and they just communicate so well when they're performing and you never feel like either of them is "alone" on stage (doing his own thing in his own little bubble), it's SUCH a joy to watch!!!! once again plugging two of my all time fave performances that i've been rewatching over and over again for the last 3 months:

also dunk is just SO little brother-shaped to me idek!! looking at his face just makes me go into big sister mode. it doesn't help that he's only like a month or so older than my actual little brother. AND he reminds me a lot of one of my fave kids from my youth group that i used to go to for years. dunk natachai has klein-andi energy and you all don't know what that means but i know what that means as does my mom and she agrees. so.

tagging:

i feel so ashamed for not making it in time before 2023 ended so i'm not gonna tag anyone but if you see this and you really wanna do it bc you haven't done it yet then please do so and tag me because i say so!!

and mutuals, send me yours bc i'm not sure i saw everyone else's!!!! (@celestial-sapphicss @moonkhao @visualtaehyun @telomeke @waitmyturtles @dribs-and-drabbles did you guys do this already and if yes, send me yours? i must have missed it 🥺🥺🥺)

[beefromanoff]

Going Under Ch. 21

summary: a whole 21 chapters in…they finally go on a first official date. it’s only fitting that this is the longest chapter yet. enjoy 🖤

characters: Bucky Barnes x OC

soundtrack: i can see you - Taylor Swift

warnings: fluff, pop star fantasy x love story, set in an AU where the Avengers reunite after Civil War, pre-infinity war, slight angst, hurt/comfort, lonely reader/OC.

author’s note: longest chapter yet WOOOOO! i know it ends on somewhat of a cliffhanger, but next chapter will have some flashbacks and fill in gaps. thanks for reading, xo!

chapter list

_________________________________________________

The sun was barely beginning to peek over the horizon, but Gianna was already out at the lake. She couldn’t sleep. All night, she’d tossed and turned and played the previous night over and over in her head. Finally, around 4:00am, she just got up. Luckily, the shift change for the night crew was around 4:30, so the grounds weren’t completely empty. She still felt a little spooked from time to time, and wandering around alone in the middle of the night didn’t do much for her nerves. 

She scrawled lines in her notebook, having written almost a whole song in the time since she’d been up. Looking over what she’d written, she sang softly to herself. 

And we kept everything professional

But something's changed, it's somethin' I, I like

They keep watchful eyes on us

So it's best that we move fast and keep quiet

You won't believe half the things I see inside my head

Wait 'til you see half the things that haven't happened yet

But what would you do if I went to touch you now?

What would you do if they never found us out?

What would you do if we never made a sound?

'Cause I can see you waitin' down the hall from me

And I could see you up against the wall with me

And what would you do, baby, if you only knew?

“Let me guess…it’s about Sam.” 

Gianna jumped as Steve’s voice interrupted the quiet morning. She turned to see him walking down the dock towards her, grinning. 

“It’s about Natasha, actually.” She rubbed her forehead, heart pounding. “You scared me.” 

“Sorry, I don’t mean to interrupt. I was just finishing up running. I can leave you to it.” He smiled sheepishly.

“No, no, this was good. I usually don’t have heart palpitations until my third cup of coffee, so you’re saving me time.” She stood to her feet as he chuckled. “Speaking of which, cup number two is calling my name.”

“I’ll walk with you. Long night?” Steve always found the balance between teasing and being kind, which Gianna appreciated. 

“Couldn’t sleep.” 

“Something tells me you weren’t the only one.” 

Gianna glanced up at him, eyebrow raised. 

“Bucky passed me an hour and a half ago, he was finishing up right when I got started. Which isn’t exactly late in the day. I’m guessing he’s in the training room now.” 

“Is that a good sign?” 

“Let’s just say he hasn’t been on a first date in…a while. He’s just nervous.”

“He has nothing to be nervous about, we spend every single day together. Literally. Every day for the past four months, with the slight exception of me being unconscious in the hospital, we’ve been together.” 

“He was there, too. In the hospital.” Steve smiled. “He left before you woke up. But he was there.” 

Gianna frowned. “See? I don’t want him to feel stressed, I feel bad, this shouldn’t be something upsetting.” 

“No, trust me, he’s not upset.” Steve laughed, waving her concerns off. “He just gets in his head. For a guy who doesn’t get too enthused about much, he actually cares quite a bit about doing things right. It’s endearing, once you get past the grouchy exterior.” 

“If you say so,” she smiled. “The last thing a semi-stable one hundred year old man needs is added stress.” 

“Hey, watch it. Age is just a number.” 

“Now you sound like Tony.”

“Don’t insult me.” 

_______________

For the rest of the morning, Gianna followed her normal routine. Get coffee, make herself slightly (only slightly) more presentable, chat with whoever happened to be in the common area (today, it was Sam), and then head down to watch Bucky train. With their evening plans hanging in the air, she felt a strange flurry of nerves in her stomach as she walked down the trail to the training building. 

Since it was a Friday, they’d be going over weapons out on the range. After a week of getting their asses handed to them in combat training, Steve and Bucky liked to end the week on a more positive note. Rounding the corner to the shooting range behind the building, Gianna spotted the duo standing near a rack of weaponry. The recruits weren’t set to begin for another ten minutes. 

“Good morning, Buck! Good morning, again, Steve!” Her voice was cheery as she greeted the super soldiers. 

“Good morning, again.” Steve smiled, stepping off to the side. 

“Morning, sunshine.” Bucky’s smile had a hint of orneriness to it. “You look cheerful this morning.” 

“I have a hot date tonight.” She winked. 

“Oof,” Bucky put a metal hand over his chest. “Don’t make me jealous.” 

“Don’t be too upset, I’m just planning on using him for his body.” Gianna kept a straight face as she shrugged. 

“Ah, I see.” He grinned. “Something tells me he won’t mind.”

The activity around them picked up as the group of SHIELD agents began to file around the corner. Gianna stepped back and began to walk towards a shady tree a few yards behind them, the perfect place to watch without being in the way. 

“Oh, Gianna,” Bucky called after her. “Be ready at 7.”

She did a mock salute as she slunk down at the base of the tree. Suddenly, her mind filled with questions about the logistics of the evening. Where the hell would they go? What should she wear? Was she even allowed to leave the compound? She whipped out her phone.

Gianna: WANDA. SOS. 

Wanda: ???? what’s wrong?

Gianna: Bucky asked me to dinner. TONIGHT. 

Wanda: omg - it’s about time! i still need deets about last night!

Gianna: deal, but I need help! I don’t have any clothes here that aren’t sweats! I don’t even know what he’s planning! 

Wanda: meet me at my room in an hour. 

Gianna: my hero!

Looking up, Gianna went back to observing the class. The gentle fall breeze provided a welcome calm in contrast to the butterflies in her stomach. She sat, hazelnut latte in hand, and focused her attention solely on the training area, not all her questions about the evening. She admired how effortlessly Steve and Bucky moved as they demonstrated each technique, their years of experience evident in every precise movement. Seeing Bucky at work, channeling years of horrific experiences into something good, it couldn’t be beat. 

Especially since his training attire was more on the snug side.

As she watched, Gianna couldn't help but marvel at Bucky's rugged charm. His dark hair was tousled from the wind, his large frame commanding even in a group of elite agents. His focus was unwavering as he instructed the recruits, his voice calm and authoritative. Ever so patient, he took a pistol from one of the recruits and demonstrated proper hand positioning before handing it back. She smiled to herself. 

I am a huge Bucky Barnes fan. 

However, Gianna's admiration was interrupted when her gaze landed on a dark-haired female agent among the recruits. The agent seemed to be going out of her way to catch Bucky's attention, a subtle flirtatiousness in her actions as she showcased her skills with the weapons. Every time she’d hit a target, her eyes flicked back to see if he was watching. Gianna couldn't deny the twinge of jealousy that washed over her. Narrowing her eyes, she tried to see if she recognized the girl. 

She was taller than Gianna, which wasn’t saying a ton, and had a long, lean stature. Gianna made a mental note to ask Nat who she was. 

Bucky, to his credit, remained focused on the task at hand, offering equal attention to all the recruits. He provided constructive feedback and demonstrated techniques, his professionalism unwavering. But even he couldn't help but notice when the female agent made a particularly daring move, doing a front somersault into a defensive position, firing the gun straight into the center of the target. 

When she inevitably glanced towards him, he gave her a nod of approval. Not exactly a warm and fuzzy reaction, but it made Gianna’s stomach turn just the same. 

As the training session continued, she shifted her focus back to the demonstration as a whole. She watched as Bucky effortlessly disarmed one of the recruits, his movements fluid and precise. There was a deep sense of respect and admiration in the way the trainees looked at him. 

Except for this bitch. I know that look. She’s undressing him with her eyes. Gianna recognized it because it wasn’t exactly unfamiliar for her. She set her jaw, reminding herself who he had the date with that evening. Pulling out her phone, she sent Wanda another text. 

Gianna: def gonna need something sexy. 

As the training session came to a close, most of the new recruits filed off to the side, discussing their progress and exchanging stories. The brunette agent, however, hung back, her gaze fixed on Bucky, determination etched across her features.

He was gathering his training materials, unaware of the lingering presence nearby. He tucked his hair behind his ear, oblivious to the brunette's intent. She took a step closer, her smile just a touch too friendly as she spoke, 

"Sergeant Barnes, that was an incredible session. You really know your stuff, not that anyone’s surprised. I’d love to get some follow up instruction sometime, maybe after class next week? I have a few techniques I’m having trouble perfecting."

Before Bucky could respond, Gianna decided it was time to make her presence known. With a confident stride, she approached the pair, fueled by the little ball of envy in her stomach. She stopped right in front of Bucky, a warm smile gracing her lips as she tilted her head to look up at him, her back to the brunette as if she didn’t exist.

"Bucky," Gianna purred, "I can't wait for tonight."

She stood on tiptoe, her lips finding Bucky's in a sweet, lingering kiss. Her hand wrapped around the back of his head, feeling his soft hair in her fingers. Bucky was taken by surprise, but as their lips met, he felt a rush of warmth that left him momentarily breathless. He smiled into their kiss. 

The brunette agent, however, was far from pleased. Her eyes widened in shock, and she took a step back, clearly annoyed that her moment had been so abruptly interrupted. She cleared her throat and shot Gianna a rather icy glare.

Pulling back, Gianna turned to the agent as if seeing her for the first time. “Oh, I’m so rude! Hi, I’m Gianna.” She held her hand out to the agent who reluctantly shook it. 

“Agent Allison.” 

“Nice to meet you.” She gave her most innocent, America’s Sweetheart smile before turning back. 

Bucky, still somewhat dazed by the unexpected kiss, managed to find his voice. "Tonight. I can’t wait.” He had that adorable half-grin she adored. 

Gianna's smile widened. "Great! See you later, Buck.” Turning, she let her hips swing just a little more than usual when she walked away. Fully aware of both sets of eyes on her, she smiled to herself. I got a little territorial, so what?

As she walked away, Bucky barely glanced back at Agent Allison, who was still standing there, fuming and forgotten. “Yeah, uh, good work. See you next week.” 

He walked back toward the training building, catching Steve’s eye. He raised his eyebrows and shrugged as Steve chuckled. 

“I think Gianna just marked her territory.” He clapped a hand on Bucky’s back.

“I guess so.” Bucky shook his head, still grinning.

_____________________________________________

Gianna sat cross-legged on Wanda's bed, surrounded by a sea of outfits that had been meticulously pulled from her wardrobe. Clothes were strewn across the bed and even scattered on the floor, creating a colorful and slightly chaotic scene. 7pm was rapidly approaching, and she hadn’t even brushed her hair yet.

Wanda, perched on the edge of a chair, regarded Gianna with a knowing smile. “I don’t want to brag, but I’m kind of a fashion connoisseur. Just about anything in here would knock Bucky off his feet, especially with you in it."

“Ugh, thank you so much, seriously. I haven’t even had to think what to wear since I got here, it’s basically just sweatsuit city. I didn’t think I’d need date attire.”

Wanda raised an eyebrow. “Really? You didn’t think this would happen?” 

“I don’t know…I guess I hoped it would. I just, I didn’t know how he felt. We worked together, then I kissed him at the party, then everything went to shit, and now I’m here.” 

“Well,” Wanda stood to her feet, pulling three outfit options from the bed. “I’m glad you’re here. Until we can have an official shopping spree in the city, what’s mine is yours. Try these.” She thrust the clothes into Gianna’s arms. 

Gianna nodded as she examined the options. She wanted something that would look pretty, sweet, but also sexy. Especially after the encounter with the brunette agent who had been eyeing Bucky a little too closely.

As she slipped on the first dress, Gianna couldn't help but vent her frustrations to Wanda. "You won't believe what happened earlier during the training session. Agent Allison, the brunette one, she was practically throwing herself at Bucky. I mean, I could practically see the hearts in her eyes!"

Wanda smirked, a hint of amusement in her expression. "Really? What did you do?"

"Well…I kissed Bucky, told him how excited I am for our date tonight, and then shook her hand.”

“Damn, subtle. You're not one to hold back, are you?"

Gianna grinned. "Nope. Not when it comes to something I want."

Wanda giggled. "I can see why. But remember, Gianna, you don't need to compete for his attention. Bucky cares about you, and he's chosen to be with you. Girls have been fawning over Mr. Dark and Mysterious since he got here a few years back, I don’t even think he notices."

Gianna sighed, smoothing the fabric on the dress as she looked in the mirror "You're right. It's just hard not to feel a little possessive when someone’s basically throwing themselves at your…well, I guess he’s not my anything yet.”

“Oh, shut up.” Wanda looked over her shoulder in the mirror and fluffed Gianna’s hair. “Have you seen the way he looks at you? He’s yours.”

Blushing, Gianna fought back a smile. “I’m really glad you’re here. It’s been nice to have a friend. Like, a real girl friend.” 

“Don’t make me emotional.” Wanda waved her hand. “We have work to do.” She winked, handing another dress to Gianna to try on. 

___________________________________________

6:55pm. 

That was the time Bucky knocked on her door. 

He’d waited as long as he possibly could. Living with Natasha and Wanda, and having grown up with a sister, he knew it was a severe offense to rush or interrupt the getting ready process. But here he was, standing outside her door with flowers in his hand, a whole five minutes early.

After training, he’d struggled to find ways to kill the rest of the afternoon. Gianna was nowhere to be found, Steve could only handle his nervous energy for so long before he made Bucky go for another run, and it took less than an hour to set up for the date he’d meticulously planned. Even though he’d only officially asked her last night, Bucky had asked the girls to help him round up some supplies as soon as he noticed Gianna’s favorite place at the compound. 

He ran a hand through his hair, taking a deep breath as he heard her footsteps approaching the door. “Hi.” The door opened and there she was. Gianna Cruz, waiting for him to come retrieve her like she’d done so many times over the past few months. Except this time was different. This time, he wasn’t working. He wasn’t here as her security, ready to escort her to her real life obligation. He was here as her date. Finally. 

“Hi,” She was grinning from ear to ear when she opened the door, eyes crinkling even more when she saw the flowers in his hand. Her hair was loosely braided, a few imperfect curls falling into her face. She’d kept her natural hair, something he’d always loved but couldn’t remember if he ever vocalized. “Two days in a row? James Buchanan Barnes. Ladies’ man extraordinaire.” 

“You ready?” He smiled and held out his arm for her to take. 

“Mmm, you could give me another two hours and I’d still be changing my hair. So it’s best just to call it.” She brushed a curl out of her face. 

“I don’t think you should change a thing. I always liked your hair like that.”

“Messy?” She looked at him sheepishly. 

“Natural.” He reached up and touched one of the curls hanging beside her face, sending a shiver down her spine when his fingertips brushed her ear. “It’s so pretty. You don’t even have to try.” 

“I try really hard, actually.” 

“You don’t have to. Not with me.” He pressed the button to the elevator button and let her step in first when the doors opened. “Do you know how amazing you look tonight, or should I go ahead and tell you?” 

Her face contorted as she fought back another smile. “You should probably go ahead and tell me.” 

“Ah, okay,” He grinned, putting a finger beneath her chin and looking straight into her eyes. “Gianna Cruz, you look so unbelievably good tonight. I cannot believe I get to call you my date.” 

The smile broke through, her face warming under his touch and attention. Just as the proximity started to cloud their minds, the elevator doors slid open. Bucky offered his left arm to her, the flowers still held in his right. Wrapping her hand around his bicep, she felt the cool metal through his long sleeve. They crossed the lobby and stepped out into the cool evening air. The sun was beginning to set, casting a golden glow across the entire compound. 

It was suspiciously empty on the grounds, but that was the last thing on Gianna’s mind. The path before them was sprinkled with rose petals, illuminated by single floating candles spaced every few feet along the way. Looking up, she saw that it followed the oh-so-familiar walk down to the dock. 

Wordlessly, she looked up at Bucky, her face showing a kind of happy he’d never seen before. She still fought back the full smile, so much so that her cheeks ached. They walked down to the lake in comfortable silence as Gianna took in every bit of the scenery and Bucky took in every bit of her reaction. The trail took a short curve through the thick woods before opening up to the clearing where the dock began. It made for a more private setting, mostly shielding it from the rest of the compound. Tonight, the element of surprise was exactly what Bucky had been counting on to help with the final reveal. 

They turned the final corner, warm sun hitting their faces as the trees cleared. 

“Bucky,” Gianna breathed, eyes widening. 

“Come on.” He slid his hand down to hers and led her to the end of the dock. There was a table with two chairs, complete with candles, wine, and full dinner setting. 

Gianna could hardly believe the moment she was living in. Mouth slightly open in awe, she didn’t even know where to look as they reached the end of the dock. Bucky pulled the chair out for her to sit. 

“I don’t even…Bucky, I…” She looked from the table to the sunset and back to him. “I don’t even know what to say. You did all this? How did you -” 

“I had a little help.” He half-smiled, pouring wine into both glasses. “After the first few days here, you kept saying how much you liked the lake. I knew you came down here as much as you could. I told Wanda what I had in mind and she found all this stuff, had it shipped to the tower. They brought it with them when they flew in a few days ago.”

“But, we just made this plan last night…?” She felt at a loss for words in the best way. 

“I know. I thought I was going to have to hide 500 candles in my closet until I finally got the balls to ask you out.” 

Gianna grinned. “I’m glad you got the balls sooner rather than later.”

“Me too.” Bucky passed her a wine glass. “To you never realizing how far out of my league you are.” 

She raised her glass to his. “To you, having the balls to ask me out.” Their glasses clinked together and they both took a slow sip of wine, neither one breaking eye contact until the glasses were back on the table. 

A low hum filled the air. Looking up, Gianna saw a midsize drone hovering across the lake, carrying silver serving platters. 

“I didn’t know there was room service at the Avengers’ Compound.” She raised an eyebrow. 

“There is if one of the programming agents in the robotics division is afraid of you.” He shrugged. 

“Ah, I’ll keep that in mind next time I go to intimidate a SHIELD agent.” She laughed, faltering when she remembered the run in from earlier. “Bucky…about earlier.” Her eyes were wide, equal parts embarrassed and amused. 

“Mhmm?” He took the dishes from the drone and set one in front of each of them, lifting the lids off to reveal the most incredible looking pasta Gianna had ever seen. 

“Oh, my God…this looks insane. Bucky! How did you do this! Last time I checked, the cafeteria doesn’t serve gourmet food.” It smelled heavenly. 

“Tony’s here for the next week, he usually flies his chef out when he’s here for too long. I just asked for a couple extra servings.” He tried to hide his grin, seem casual, but her excitement was contagious. 

“I can’t even think straight.” She took a sip of her wine. 

“I hope that’s a good thing. It’s been a while since I last went on a date, so I’m a little out of practice.” 

“It’s a good thing.” Gianna leaned forward, resting her chin on her hands. “A very, very good thing.” 

As the sun slowly sunk below the horizon, dinner conversation flowed effortlessly. Bucky told stories from the past few years as an Avenger, including how Peter’s first words to him were about how cool his metal arm was - during a fight, no less. Gianna gushed about all the situations she’d been stuck in throughout her stardom where she wished she had someone to share it with, someone who saw it all and could laugh about it on the drive back to the hotel every night. It was easy. It was natural. 

Laughed lulled as Bucky finished a story about how Tony had once gotten way too drunk at a party and announced to the entire crowd he’d peed in the Iron Man suit. 

“Oh my gosh, ow.” Gianna leaned back in her chair. “My stomach hurts. I laughed too much. I definitely ate too much.” 

“There’s no such thing.” Bucky leaned forward, splitting the last of the wine between their glasses. 

“Mm, yet another reason I like you.” She winked, raising her glass towards him before taking a sip. 

“So,” Bucky grinned. “How am I doing?”

“Are you seriously asking for feedback in the middle of our date?” Gianna giggled.

“Hey, like I said, it’s been awhile. I just want to make sure I’m on the right track.” He put his hands up defensively. “Plus, Wanda may or may not have shown me photos of your last few dates. Tough acts to follow.” 

Rolling her eyes, Gianna set her glass down. “Which photos did you see?” 

“Helicopter ride with that football player?” 

“We were paid by the helicopter company. We’d only spoken twice before that and once after.”

“Dinner on a yacht with that actor?” 

“Horrible. He only talked about himself. I’m also pretty sure he thought I was someone else. He told me I was shorter than he expected and then asked me if I was allowed to eat dessert since the Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show was coming up.” Gianna groaned. “I thought it was a really weird thing to say, but when I thought about it later I realized he definitely didn’t think I was me.” 

“His loss.” Bucky gave her a half-smile. “Okay, last one…what about the guy who rented that restaurant out for you? Didn’t you…weren’t you pretty serious?” 

“No.” She smiled, but it was somber. “That was a PR stunt. He had a big movie coming out, they used two of my songs on the soundtrack, it was supposed to be big for both of our careers. And it was, I guess. It’s just, sometimes it can be hard to pretend without forgetting what’s real and what’s work. It gets messy.”

Bucky watched her, spinning the stem of his wine glass between metal fingers. 

“It was also a long time ago.” Gianna continued, giving a reassuring look. “I was very young. I didn’t really know how things were done in the industry and that made me vulnerable. That’s why I haven’t really dated over the past couple years…I wanted something real.” 

She reached her hand across the table, replacing the wine glass in his grip.

“I still do.” 

“I’d assure you that this is real, but truth be told, I’m still waiting for someone to pinch me.” Bucky squeezed her hand ever so lightly. If she ever felt strangely about his vibranium hand, she never showed it. 

She met his eyes, relaxing in his gaze. “You and your lines, Sargeant.” 

He stood to his feet, still holding her hand. “Is it too old-fashioned if I ask you to dance?” 

“Maybe,” Gianna slid out of her chair, letting him guide her to the center of the dock. “But that doesn’t mean I want you to stop.” 

The soft music that had been playing throughout dinner was paired with the quiet creaking of the dock and the crickets as they swayed slowly. 

_________________________________________

“Shh!” Wanda hissed. “You know sounds carry across water!”

Peter shut up and retreated to the back of the balcony. The group had gathered on the patio, claiming to want fresh air after dinner, but secretly all hoping to catch a glimpse of the date they’d all helped facilitate. 

“See anything, Rogers?” Natasha called, taking a sip of her drink. 

“I told you, I don’t condone spying.” He looked up from his chair. “They’re dancing.” 

Grinning, Nat stood to her feet and walked to the railing where Wanda and Sam stood. 

“You think they’d notice if I sent Red Wing over there? I could get us some live footage.”

“Sam, if you give Bucky any excuse to rip that thing out of the sky, he’s not going to hesitate.” Steve reluctantly joined them, thankful the dock was far enough away that it took super soldier vision to really see what was going on. 

“They’re hopeless.” Wanda said. “So in love.” 

“Are you saying that as a mind-reader?” Peter asked, wide-eyed. 

“I’m saying that as someone who talked to them both today.” She rolled her eyes. “And as someone with eyes.” 

“Okay, alright. Let’s give them some privacy. If you want to watch someone on a date then put on that trashy show you’re always watching.” Steve ushered them inside. 

“Steve, you know the Bachelor is only on Monday night.” Sam elbowed him, walking through the door. “What, a man can’t enjoy quality reality television?!”

When he was the only one remaining on the balcony, Steve took one last glance down at the dock just in time to see Bucky raise Gianna’s hand and spin her around. Grinning, he stepped inside and shut the door. 

[blazehedgehog]

Have you ever played Chrono Cross?

I own Chrono Cross! Chrono Trigger is one of my favorite RPGs of all time! I was psyched to play Chrono Cross!

I was extremely disappointed by Chrono Cross!

Chrono Cross feels like a game made almost to spite fans of Chrono Trigger. Vastly different art style, vastly different world, with a lore that basically says "Remember everybody you loved from Trigger? They're dead now. And they probably died tragic or embarrassing deaths."

It fills that void with a lot of incoherency. Because Cross hangs its hat on having 44 collectible party members, very few of them have any impact and basically never participate in the main story. The English localization is even structured in such a way that most of the cast pulls from a single library of side-character dialog that gets fed through an "accent filter" depending on who is saying it. Meaning 97% of the cast is not written to have any legitimate role in the story.

What story can be gleaned is a deliberately confusing mess of mysteries layered within mysteries, none of which ever get explained until the last 3-5 hours of gameplay. So you toil for 27+ hours not having any idea what's going on or why, only to get hit by a freight train of dense lore as you start to round the final bend.

I only know this because a friend explained it all to me once, about FATE and the lineage of the Dragonians and all of that late-game lore.

In truth, I got stuck in Chrono Cross and not even pouring over 3 different GameFAQ guides could get me unstuck. It was some event involving one of the versions of Captain Fargo, or at least that's what I thought I had to do. It was some time after the "switch" event with Serge (if you know, you know) and all the guides said I had to get Fargo to go back to Marbule or something.

But it never worked. He never budged. So I didn't know where to go. After a week of throwing myself at that problem I gave up and resigned myself to never finishing Chrono Cross. This was back in, like, 2002 or 2003, so faded memories by now.

Which I was fine with, because honestly, I was getting pretty bored to tears with the game. There's only so much "you don't know what's going on because it's a 𝑚𝑦𝑠𝑡𝑒𝑟𝑦" before you get tired of it, and systems-wise it wasn't grabbing me either. That was Square's "experimental" phase, where they were messing with (or straight up deleting) core RPG mechanics just to see what would happen. So Final Fantasy 8 screwed with the gear and magic systems, and Chrono Cross screwed with how you gain experience points and level up.

Which is to say you kind of... don't? Only bosses give EXP, so that basically means you're always guaranteed to level up after every boss. There's no reason to fight fodder enemies outside of getting item drops. Which would be great if they let you avoid most monster encounters, but they don't, so it just wastes time and contributes towards nothing. And battles get needlessly drawn out thanks to the elemental field system, too.

It's a gorgeous game, full of absolutely immaculate art direction. I'm a lifelong fan of any soundtrack with Yasunori Mitsuda (and I even have an autographed Chrono Cross songbook from him!) But anything about the story or gameplay is wet cardboard to me.

I keep thinking about going back to it, starting over fresh, seeing if I like it more now that I'm an older and different person. But I haven't gotten around to it yet. Like a lot of RPGs in my life right now it's locked behind the promise of "maybe after I finish Mother 3" which is going on two years now -- but I picked it back up this week and am rounding the final bend on that one, if you can believe it.

[tadpoleatemybrain]

BG3 Tag Game 🦑

Thanks @kalmiaphlox I love getting tagged in these ^_^

Favorite romance: So far I've only romanced Astarion and his route is the one I've seen the most of. However, I'm planning to do a run for every romanceable companion because I legitimately love all of them. I'm thinking Gale will be next, which was a close tie with Karlach.

Favorite class to play: My two in game tavs have been a fighter and a sorcerer. (I haven't gotten far on the sorcerer run) I'm planning to try bard out next. So I don't have an answer for this yet.

Favorite NPC: Dame Aylin, hands down, I'm a gayer woman after her cutscene in Act 2, but I also like Mol and Raphael a lot.

Favorite song off the soundtrack: The Mind Flayer theme slaps.

Tell us a little about your Tav: Have you ever heard the song "The Devil Went Down to Georgia"? That, but Johnny lost and the devil liked him just enough to keep him around. He's an 8 intelligence and 17 charisma bardlock with an accent no one can place (and you never actually find out where he's from). He likes animals, bluegrass, booze and gambling. He'd love to join every companion in their tent, if they're so inclined.

Something you wish was in the game: That if you recruit Minthara via knock out that Halsin still gets a tent. I just feel so bad seeing him sitting there...I know he's probably used to sleeping/sitting on the ground, but he doesn't even get to hang out with Thaniel. T_T

Do you create fanworks? Share something with us: I do! I write fics. BG3 is the first fandom I've written a fic for in three years @_@. Currently my Dadstarion is the most popular, Dhamphir Dilemas it's on the angsty side so if you want something lighter I have my Professor AU.

Tagging: Anyone that wants to

[triskhellion]

20 Questions for fic writers

Tagged by @dear-massacre

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

Twenty-one. Twenty fics and one weird standalone soundtrack, lol.

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

195,750.

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Just Teen Wolf so far, but I maybe I'll get around to some ideas I have for The Sandman or something else one day.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Thunder (Sterek. 12.1k. Explicit. Depressed loner Derek meets on-the-run Werefox/Kitsune Stiles in rural Montana.)

The Cold Moon (Sterek, 40.6k. Explicit. Part one of a story where Stiles is forced across a mysterious boundary by Hunters and encounters a semi-feral Alpha Derek. My first published fic.)

Second Chance Strays (Sterek, 8.5k. Explicit. Mage Stiles, Derek, & Larem the deer alone in the wilderness. A Fuck or Die situation ensues when a darach attacks.)

CLAIM! (Sterek, 11.9k, Explicit. Misunderstandings and making up after Derek & Stiles meet at Jungle and hook-up.)

Customer Service (Sterek, 10.9k. Explicit. Surly barista omega Derek and human college student Stiles. Banter, vulgar latte art, and heat sex. Dominant Derek, Service Top Stiles.)

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Yes! Sometimes it takes a while, but comments are appreciated and I know I like getting responses.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

I guess Amīca (Derissa) because it's an unresolved pre-relationship fic that's meant to be the first In a series. I've been a happy ending gal, so no real angsty ones so far. The angst is in the beginning and/or middle!

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

The rest of them? 😂

8. Do you get hate on fics?

I haven't yet. Knocks on wood.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Yes. Most of my fics have smut at some point, lol. Or belong to series that do/will.

Um, barebacking and creampie/breeding. Cum eating or play and marking in general, including hickeys and biting.

Virgin/first time bottoming, praise kink, light degradation, and knotting are also in a number of stories. Some spanking, bondage and pinning, and generally low-key dominance and submission. Chasing and claiming and a few omegaverse or just self-lubrication. (I have plans for more.)

All M/M or M/M/M so far, but I have WIPs and notes with other combinations. I have a bunch of Kinktober bits from 2022 to turn into fics that I'm both nervous and excited about. And lots of other ideas too.

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

Not yet, but I have a summary for a Sterek Teen Wolf/The Sandman crossover.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I'm aware of.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Nope.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

No. Sounds both fun and kinda scary.

14. What’s your all time favourite ship?

Sterek is what finally got me into fanfiction and the whole shipping fandom thing a few years ago, so I gotta go with them. I enjoy a bunch of others from Teen Wolf too (especially Steter, Stetopher, and Sterek + various people) and from other fandoms.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I currently intend to finish all my WIPs, but who knows what the future will hold. I have 3 posted WIPs that I definitely plan to complete: The Wolf Moon, The Depths, and 15 Shades of Red. I have dozens of unposted ones that I also hope to finish...eventually.

16. What are your writing strengths?

Apparently dialogue, world building, characters' inner thoughts, and being funny sometimes. Coming up with ideas.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Epithets. It's just tricky when the characters have the same pronouns and I hate writing their names over and over. (I don't mind when other people do it though, so 🤷🏽‍♀️. But then I'll be like, "I can't say Derek three times in this paragraph!")

I've started looking for ones to remove whenever I edit now (and I'm cringing thinking about earlier stories that I should re-edit at some point,) but I still use some and am self-conscious about it.

Also, sometimes I info dump, but that doesn't bother me so much. Boom, here's a bunch of background now let's get on with it, lol.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

I've used a few words in Polish here and there in some stories, but I probably wouldn't try to write whole conversations in another language unless I was familiar with it or could ask someone about it.

There's some Patois/Patwah in Irie, which was interesting to write because there's no one set spelling of many words, so it was part looking at common ones and part "What did it sound like/how was it phrased when this relative or family friend said something like this?"

19. First fandom you wrote for?

I vaguely recall thinking up scenes, dialogue, background, etc, for a story with Byakuya Kuchiki/Shūhei Hisagi from Bleach approximately 5 billion years ago when I was a teenager, but I don't remember if I ever actually wrote anything. Definitely didn't finish or publish anything. So...Teen Wolf.

20. Favourite fic you’ve written?

Hmm. I can't say that I have a favorite. I only started actually writing from my list of fic ideas around 16 months ago, IIRC. Maybe if I look back on them all after enough time passes I'll be able to pick one out (though knowing me...still probably not,) but right now they're all just...floating around in my head and also mixed with the particular experiences of writing them, idk.

Here's a recent one that was fun to write:

Legs (Sterek, 4.3k. Explicit. Snark and smut after college students Derek and Werecreature Stiles cross paths at the mall.)

If you want to play along, tag, you're it!

[ghost-proofbaby]

just rewatched the first episode/the scene where eddie tries to wake up chrissy! couldn’t help but imagine eddie trying to wake willow up in ‘so mordor it is’… have you thought about that scene yet?? love it and can’t wait for an update!

oh nonnie. are we sure we want the answer to that? because yes, yes i have.

her favorite song is the chain by fleetwood mac, and that was never a throwaway detail or just a cute little bit to help better expand her character/their relationship. 😌😌😌 nor was eddie purchasing a cassette of fleetwood mac

but something i don't think i've ever pointed out is how they have several songs attached to several good memories between them, and for good reason. imagine a panicked eddie, on the verge of losing the person he cares about the most. to find out music is the key. to remember all their fragile beginnings, all of the music that was always laced throughout their moments. to have to debate what song he needs to play.

is it africa by toto, the soundtrack to their ridiculous dance in the rain and the first time he'd ever seen her smile so widely at the sight of a storm?

is it you send me by sam cooke, a song that still sends eddie's heart racing when he remembers holding willow in the middle of her kitchen, the smell of cookies and her shampoo wrapping him up so tightly he suddenly can't breathe from all the love inside of him?

is it possibly a song by metallica? one of the ones he played during one of the hundreds of times she'd sat prettily in his passenger seat, looking at him with warmth he's never had the privilege to know before? could fade to black be enough, the memory of eddie swaying with her in the middle of a crowd where she should feel entirely out of place but she can only feel completely at home while in his arms? or for whom the bells toll, the song she mentioned liking in that hotel room during a night full of new experiences?

i'm just being a dumbass and rambling now, but my point is - yeah. yeah, i've thought about it a lot. even written an aftermath scene between the two of them for it. i like to break my own heart a lot, if we haven't already realized this. <3

[new-albums-daily]

Aimee Mann – Bachelor No. 2 or, the Last Remains of the Dodo (2000)

13 tracks, 49 min 27 sec

Rating: 9/10

Top Track: Driving Sideways

Had a long day today, sat down and looked at my spreadsheet to see I had accidentally chosen a repeat artist for today, oops. *taps at the invisible sign with my made up "rules"* I didn't want to do this yet, since I'm avoiding repeating artists without a month gap if at all, so moved that back to the list of prospects and brought in a chill album to help me chill out after today. Discovered Aimee Mann through the film Magnolia, which is really written around her music, and I know that soundtrack really well, but nothing else of hers. The soundtrack overlaps with this album a bit: namely, Nothing Is Good Enough, Deathly, Driving Sideways, and You Do are all songs I already knew, though I think they're mixed differently here? I don't have the best ear for this and haven't heard the Magnolia versions in a while, so not entirely sure, but it feels like it to me. Oh and no, this is not the longest album title so far. That's still Lola vs. Powerman.

This album was more of what I loved about the Aimee Mann songs I already knew, which is to say it was really fantastic. She's a great songwriter, and it's definitely worth it to pay attention to her lyrics here. Not that I don't always do that, but especially here I did that. This is missing something a little special that would bring it to a 10 that I can't quite name, but a really great album regardless. Favorite tracks of mine included Nothing Is Good Enough, Red Vines, and Satellite.

[dragons-and-dwarves-are-nice]

To the Shadows that Cry Witch /// Chapter 12

Heyyy, so I know I keep posting a little late, but I'm gonna keep trying to post on time because I need to keep on top of things and not spiral into the unscheduledness like I did after I left school lol. ANYWAY, this chapter is the start of where things get interesting and it's hopefully going to be the last shorter chapter I do for a while - I'm going to try and make future chapters over 2-3k words so you guys have something longer to red each week. Enjoy! <3

Summary: Magic was real, but it came at a price. So when two girls end up in the one place they never thought they could reach, strange things began to happen. Good or bad? That's up to them to find out.

Tags: Kíli x oc/reader - Fíli x oc (POV to be written soon) - Thorin's company x ocs/reader (platonic) - fluff - angst - EXTREME slow burn - crack - Bagginshield

Word Count: 1262

Warnings: Mentions of Minor and Major Injuries from last chapter.

Taglist - comment or message to be added!

PLEASE START FROM THE BEGINNING IF YOU HAVEN'T ALREADY OK LOVE U

Want some background music? Check out my Soundtrack Playlist!

Now available on Wattpad and AO3 (please let me know if links aren't working)

< Chapter 11 // Chapter 12 // Chapter 13 >

PART 2: Chapter 12 -

Not much has changed but there's no Wi-Fi now

Smultronställe (Definition): A special place discovered for solace and relaxation. (Noun / Origin: Swedish / smUl·tron·’stel·e)

Hobbiton, The Shire – T.A. Mersday 29th September 2939 of the Third Age (1339 in Shire-reckoning)

“Kate! What did I say about wearing your bandages?”

I sheepishly turned around to face a weary Bilbo, a guilty smile on my face. Heaving a sigh, he marched over, pointing expectantly at the discarded bandage roll on the table next to me as he passed, continuing around the furniture to reach the stove across from where I was sitting.

“How was the market?” I asked him as I reached for the roll. Watching him heave a sack onto the table, I began wrapping the material around my right palm. Well, as best as I could with the splint on my left hand.

Erard had revisited the day after Bilbo had dragged him over to help us, slinging along with him a bag full of equipment he had curated from his medical supplies. He spent an hour or so kindly showing us what everything was and how to use it. I had received many bandages that now covered the majority of my skin that was visible, along with a splint he had fashioned out of small, thin planks of wood that he bound in place with yet more bandages around my damaged wrist. My ankle only received a wrap of some type of sturdy material, since Erard had considered it unnecessary for it to have a splint as well.

Kay received just as many bandages, along with one around her head for the large gash on her forehead. She definitely wasn’t a big fan of it, since it made her look as if she was wearing a white bald cap, which I of course kept cackling about, much to her dismay. According to her extreme annoyance, it was preventing the hot injured main character look she was trying to achieve, which obviously made me cackle harder. Finally, Erard had given us both a bag of herbal tea to help alleviate any aches, and each small pot of some type of salve, which he instructed us to use on any open wound, once a day.

Bilbo on the other hand, had spent that time preparing a hefty luncheon, as part of his thanks to Erard, making sure the doctor didn’t leave without a full belly of his best sandwiches and seed cake.

Now it had been three days since Erard’s visit, and thanks to him, we were speedily on the mend. Fast enough to the point that I didn’t feel the need to wear my bandages as much (apart from the splint), much to Bilbo’s frustration. Though it was me forgetting to most of the time, living with an adhd brain and all. My small recollection of events was interrupted as Bilbo began answering my question:

“Not too bad.” He said as he emptied the sack of its contents. “Not bad at all, in fact. The weather has improved tremendously since that nasty storm, not a cloud in the sky the entire time I was there!”

I grimaced at Bilbo mentioning the storm, recalling the unfortunate events that Kay and I had endured. Though I quickly shoved them away as I focused on Bilbo as he rambled on about his experience at marketplace.

“– and got some tremendous pork from Barrowes’ stall, fresh this morning. Should be perfect for this evening’s dinner!”

“It looks amazing.” I commented as he unwrapped the large slab of meat from its casing of brown paper and twine. “What do you suppose would go with it?”

Once again Bilbo went off on a tangent, this time about sides and vegetables. Getting up from my seat, I made sure to make responsive hums and small comments as the hobbit spoke. I picked up the bowl of buttermilk icing I had left on the windowsill earlier and brought it over to the kitchen table, placing it next to the now cool cakes. I had baked two Victoria sponge cakes that morning, deciding that as I healed, I would bake as part of my thanks to Bilbo for letting us stay, and to Erard for his kindness and help – that is, as long as I could remember the recipes. Bilbo handed me a jar of freshly bought jam and I got to work slathering it on the cake halves along with a whipped cream I had made miraculously from scratch. I could see Bilbo eyeing up the cakes with a hungry look, so I made sure to speed up a little to make sure I was finished soon, so we could have it for pudding.

Bilbo and I were chatting away about different types of pastries when Kay ducked in through the doorway from the dining room. You couldn’t tell easily, but you could see a slight tension in the way she held her expression, giving me the impression that she was worried or very confused about something. I waited until she made eye contact with me, before tilting my head slightly in question. She darted her eyes at Bilbo, then back at me, indicating that she would talk to me later. I discreetly nodded my head in agreement and turned back to slathering my cake in an atrocious amount of icing, dropping the subject until later. Bilbo continued with his ramblings about dinner, and Kay soon joined in on helping him prepare it, the conversation turning to how to cook pork properly.

The cakes were a success. Bilbo and Kay’s delicious dinner had filled us all and we finally moved on to trying one of my sponge cakes. By the time Kay and I had finished our slice, Bilbo was onto his third, any compliments practically turning to murmuring chants as he stuck another forkful in his mouth.  I snorted at the scene before me, thanking the now chipmunk-faced hobbit as I picked up some pots and took them to the sink. I also brought the second cake for Erard to the pantry, placing it on a plate with a large bowl on top to keep in the moisture. The next half hour whirled by as we washed everything up, Bilbo insisting that I only dried up to not soak my splint whilst in exchange I made him agree to leave some cake for tomorrow.

Laughing at whatever was said, Bilbo disappeared off to his wine cellar, and I quickly took this opportunity to interrogate Kay about earlier as I beckoned her towards me.

“What’s going on? Are you ok?” I whispered.

“Yea course, I’m doing fine. It’s just…” She trailed off, before silently signalling me to follow her. I did so, following behind as she led me from the kitchen through the parlour to the front entrance. “You haven’t noticed anything strange appear in your room, have you?” Bilbo’s whistling echoed through the house as she led me deeper into the oak hall. I shook my head in reply, saying that I hadn’t been in my room all day.

Bilbo had decided that, because we were supposedly staying a while, he would give us both our own privacy by lending me the guest bedroom we stayed in the first night and turning the spare room into guest bedroom No.2 for Kay, who was leading me there right now.

Opening the door, she waited for me to follow through before closing it. Leading me over to a chest, she hauled the wooden lid open and pointed inside. I leant over, only to see something I thought impossible. I looked at Kay with wide eyes, before reaching in and hauling it out onto the floor between us. We both stared incredulously until I spoke.

“Well, that’s not supposed to be here.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

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< Chapter 11 // Chapter 12 // Chapter 13 >

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[i-heart-hxh]

the funny thing is that I can relate to gon on a personal level. the whole feeling guilty, taking the blame, and explode when things are too much. so to me, the way gon react after knowinh kite's death, is totally understandable. but it still makes me sad to see ppl wrongly interpret his actions and ignored his feelings. like he went though hell too during the whole arc. anyway we know that he regretted his action and he apologized to killua but his action had also caused a crack in their friendship. something that is unfortunate and I think that why the separation is needed to repair it.

but still hurt and I hate it.

and I finally get to meet alluka and I have to say that I still haven't warmed up to her. aside from being a factor in killugon separation, something about togashi introducing her in the series and we are heading to the dark continent arc? makes me wary of her. sure she's cute but well it let's just say, she isn't my fave characte.

I hope the movies are as good and I get to see my boys again. need them to heal this broken heart 😭 (2/2)

I'm glad you finished it! Thanks for coming back to give your impressions!

I agree about the way some of the fandom sees Gon and especially Gon's actions in Chimera Ant arc. It's such a shallow way to view the series and it surprises me how many people don't have compassion and understanding for what Gon went through. His feelings of guilt and his issues with self-esteem that lead up to what happened are present throughout the series--it makes a lot of sense when you go back and watch or read it again, there's so much foreshadowing and build up. I have no doubt Togashi was building in this direction all along. It's frustrating seeing people reacting to Gon's trauma without considering his age and all the reasons it makes sense for him to react the way he did. Even though we didn't see much of his perspective during Chimera Ant arc, it's clear how much pain he was in.

I do think the separation is ultimately good for them, though it certainly makes me sad, too--especially because we haven't gotten a reunion yet. 💔 (As I said in my prior meta, I have a lot of hope that we will eventually, though, assuming Togashi is able to keep working on the manga.)

I'm happy you're going to read the manga next! It's the original, after all, and there are some things that were left out or are a bit different than in the 2011 anime. Plus of course there's the next arc, even though Gon and Killua aren't present. The movies are not widely considered "good" LOL, and they're not technically canon because they weren't written by Togashi, but at least they're something you can consume to help with the post-anime heartbreak. The 1999 anime is also worth watching, though it deviates a lot more from the manga than the 2011 anime does (in some ways I like and some ways I don't like, personally). The atmosphere, art, and soundtrack are distinctive and lovely.

I like Alluka myself and I'm curious about the role she and Nanika will play going forward, but to each their own of course! You're entitled to your own opinion on her. She was a factor in the separation, sure, but Gon also wouldn't be healed without her.

My experience is that the broken heart from HxH doesn't go away if it truly resonates with you (and it sounds like it did for you!), but there are a lot of ways to cope with it--consuming the series multiple times in the different formats available, reading/writing meta and fanfics and looking at/drawing fanart, and commiserating with other people in the fandom. Hang in there, I remember how intense that feeling was at first! I'm always happy to discuss more if you have any particular topics you want to talk about!