#the wedding was gorgeous it was a wonderful weekend it meant so much to be there and everything went really well

[theghostofashton]

.

[creedslove]

omg, could you write something about javi leaving you in laredo, like you were high school sweethearts of something like that, then he left to colombia, but a few years later he returns and his pops asks him to go to a wedding with him and it’s YOUR wedding?! 😭

Javier Peña x f!reader

A/N: omg I love this idea my darling!!!

• you didn't know exactly why you loved Javier so much, perhaps it was because he seemed to be the real deal: deadly handsome, sweet, caring, lovely, flirty and well it didn't even bother you the fame he had of being a womanizer

• you were so in love with him, you couldn't even believe how lucky you were to have Javi all for yourself and you knew things were getting more and more serious, it would be just a matter of time until you two got married

• or so you thought, so when Javi came to you and broke the news he was going to Colombia; you didn't worry about it at all, you were sure he would just ask you to take with him and you two would continue living your love story

• so when he told you he was going alone, your heart shattered; you couldn't believe he did this to you, you loved Javi and he told you he loved you too, but you couldn't go, he wanted to be free there, he knew it was going to be a dangerous task and he couldn't risk your well being

• you weren't buying his excuse, you loved Javier and you felt so heartbroken to know he had left you behind as if you meant nothing to him, convinced that he meant much more to you than you did to him

• so you had to pick up the pieces of your broken shattered heart and get back to your old life, the one you had no Javier

• it was very difficult in the first few days, weeks and months, but when all that turned into years, the pain went away, though the burning feeling of humiliation still cut you like a knife at times, whenever you stopped to think about it

• Javi spent his years in Colombia chasing down drug lords, drinking, smoking and whoring but just like everything in life, it came to an end and he went back to Laredo

• while he was in his hometown, Javi had to deal with the boring fact that everyone saw him a local hero and requested his presence in all the city events, so there wasn't a weekend Chucho would let him just smoking on the couch before driving to bar and get waisted, instead, he dragged Javi to weddings, birthdays, quinceñeras, baptisms and any other excuse people from town found to celebrate

• at first it was kinda fun but it got old pretty quick and suddenly he wasn't in the mood for it any longer but when Chucho told him it was your wedding, he couldn't say no

• he should have said no, but he couldn't miss the opportunity of seeing you again one more time

• he very often thought of you, lonely nights caused him to wonder how you were doing and how things would've been like if you two had stayed together

• sometimes, he would even allow himself to have a deep secret fantasy about you having waited for him

• but you were too good and beautiful for that, and now he would watch you dressed as a bride walking down the aisle for another man

• he sat down in church and watched around nervously, feeling tense and his mouth going dry the moment you walked down the aisle

• you were gorgeous, breathtakingly beautiful in that dress, he looked at your future husband and rolled his eyes, that man wasn't worthy of you

• but then neither was Javi because he had broken your heart by being an asshole

• and his punishment was to watch as you were about to start your life with someone else and hopefully be happy with him, that was what Javi wished you at least, a lifetime of happiness, even if he wasn't the one to give you that

____

[bitchinbarzal]

rotwm series: mountain with a view — q.hughes

based on mountain with a view by kelsea ballerini

-

It's 7 a.m. and I'm on a mountain with a view. I'm the only one, alone, at a table meant for two. Big Sur looks beautiful this morning and I should be missin' you, I should be missin' you.

You sat in the window nook of your Airbnb. In all your time travelling around after Quinn you’d never truly experienced California, how beautiful it was.

It was the same Airbnb that you’d stayed in together on your honeymoon.

The honeymoon you had to settle for when your luxurious all inclusive honeymoon was ruined. Quinn had decided to go back to Vancouver early to start training and after a lot of back and forth arguments he agreed to a long weekend in California.

You thought you’d be sad to return, this time without him but you weren’t. You did everything you wanted to the first time round that Quinn deemed

“Not fun”

“Boring”

And “a waste of time”

You didn’t miss him and you felt so happy.

You're across the pond at a show, I think, in Amsterdam and the pictures look pretty, at least they do on your Instagram We say good morning, then goodnight I wonder if you even know where I am, where I am

You couldn’t even remember where he was playing tonight. You were only reminded when you saw he had reposted a picture from Brock’s story onto his.

They were out at some restaurant all smiling and laughing.

You’d actually only checked instagram when your mom had asked you where Quinn was playing that night and you couldn’t even answer her.

You used to follow him around when he went on roadies, travelling to New Jersey and Toronto just to support him and now you didn’t talk whenever he was on the road, he’d ask what you got up to whenever he got home but you knew he didn’t really care and just wanted to fill the silence.

I'm wearin' the ring still, but I think I'm lyin' Sometimes you forget yours, I think we're done tryin' I realize you loved me much more at twenty-three I think that this is when it's over for me

Whenever you did finally do something together it was a work event — the canucks annual charity ball.

“Oh my goodness I can’t ever get over how gorgeous this ring is!” Brock’s girlfriend smiles, grabbing your hand and admiring your wedding ring.

“Thank you!” You replied, blushing and leaning into Quinn’s side.

She scowled “Quinn you’re not wearing yours?” You looked down at Quinn’s left hand to find the gold band gone.

“Oh! I must’ve forgot it” he brushes it off, giving a tight smile.

You didn’t reproach the situation that night.

But you watched him across the next few weeks every morning as he brushed over his wedding band in your jewelry box.

He never put it on.

“Hey, why aren’t you wearing your wedding ring?” You asked one morning, brushing your hair in the mirror.

“It’s not a big deal” he grumbled.

“It’s our wedding rings Quinn, it is a big deal!”

“God why are you such a bitch lately? Why can’t you be chill like you used to?”

You look at him, wide eyes “What the fuck is that supposed to mean?!”

“Like why can’t you just be like when we first got married? Silent and Supportive!”

You didn’t even reply, simply turning to leave the room before you burst into tears.

I think that this is when I cut the ties I think that is when I set myself free One day you'll ask, "When was it over for you?"

I'm takin' the ring off, I'm finally cryin' Don't try to find yours, no reason to fight it

You'll say I'm crazy for bein' the one to leave Scream I'm just like my parents and givin' up easy

But you never took that last flight to see me.

“Babe come on you don’t have to do this!” Quinn cries, following you through the house.

He’d come home from practice to find your suitcases by the front door and you standing at the kitchen counter waiting for him.

He asked why your suitcases were outside, what was wrong. You never answered, simply sliding your wedding ring along the granite and he groaned lowly.

“Baby…”

“Don’t Quinn!” You snap “It’s over”

“It Just just be over!” He screams “We are married!”

You look at him waving his arms around wildly and tears drop down your cheeks

“Quinn… let me go please”

His eyes soften and he steps around the counter “Baby please… why?”

You looked at him, he could feel the pain you were in just by your face. He wanted to reach out and hold you.

“Quinn… you never come home anymore”

“I’m always home?!” He screams, hands waving around.

He wasn’t screaming in anger, he was scared screaming. Screaming to hold onto what was slowly slipping away from him.

You sniffled, hands shaking as you reached up and held his face

“I don’t know the man that walks through those doors anymore… but it’s not you that comes home to me”

The tears were streaming down his face as well as yours as he mumbled

“You can’t leave me”

“Quinn I should’ve left a long time ago”

[readingforsanity]

The Unwedding | Ally Condie | Published 2024

Ellery Wainwright is alone at the edge of the world.

She and her husband, Luke, were suposed to spend their 20th wedding anniversary together at the luxurious Resort at Broken Point in Big Sur, California. Where better to celebrate a marriage, a family and a life together than one at the most stunning places on earth?

But now, she's traveling solo.

To add insult to injury, there's a wedding at Broken Point scheduled during her stay. Ellery remembers how it felt to be on the cusp of everything new and wonderful, with a loved and certain future glimmering just ahead. Now, she isn't certain of anything except for her love for her kids and her growing realization that this place, though beautiful, is unsettling.

When Ellery discovers the body of the groom floating in the pool in the rain, she realizes that she is not the only one whose future is no longer guaranteed. Before the police can reach Broken Point, a mudslide takes out the road to the resort, leaving the guests trapped. When another guest dies, it's clear something horrible is brewing.

Everyone at Broken Point has a secret. And everyone has a shadow. Including Ellery.

Ellery is celebrating her 20th anniversary alone. In a trip that was booked prior to her divorce with her husband, Luke, she decides to attend the weekend away at Broken Point Resort in Big Sur, California at the urging of her best friend Abby.

Thus Ellery finds herself at the gorgeous wilderness resort. On her first night, she meets Ravi and Nina, two friends who have arrived from New York City, who spend time together on vacation at least once a year. Ellery is immediately taken with them, and their hospitality toward her. So much so that when Ravi suggests they crash the wedding taking place at the resort that weekend, Ellery agrees.

Ellery is introduced to the bride, a lovely girl named Olivia. Olivia confesses that she and her fiancee, Ben, wished to have a smaller affair but they had decided to go ahead with the larger celebration because of her mother, Catherine Haring, who was paying for everything as Ben's own parents had died when he was only 14 years old.

But, the night of the wedding, Ellery is disheartened to learn that Ben had decided to leave Olivia at the altar, and Catharine was giving out the food meant for the wedding party and guests to the other guests at the resort so it wouldn't go to waste. Ellery is shocked, as the bride and groom appeared to be so in love the night before.

However, Ellery is also the individual who finds Ben's body, floating face down in the pool when she decided to take a late night swim. Nobody is sure what happened to Ben, and the following day, another individual in the wedding party is also found deceased.

The three new friends are sure something crazy is afoot, and now nobody can leave the resort simply because of a raging storm and mudslide that has made getting out of the resort impossible. Ellery is sure that something evil is happening at the resort, even more so after Olivia herself goes missing.

Ravi, Nina and Ellery attempt to come up with ideas on who killed Ben and Matt, his best man and why Olivia has suddenly gone missing. Just when they think they have things figured out, they don't.

Ellery accompanies Andy, one of the groomsman and Ben's best friend, on a hike in his attempt to get off the resort in search of help. But, Ellery mistakenly believes that Andy is the person behind both Ben and Matt's deaths. When she arrives at the altar, the location where the wedding should have taken place days before, she finds Nina, Grace and Olivia, who is safe and sound, in addition to Catharine joining them. Olivia is certain that one of the four of them is the person behind their deaths. During her interrogations, Jason, one of the groomsmen, interrupts.

Olivia believes that Nina is Ben's long-lost godmother, but Nina tells her that she is not, that she didn't know Ben at all. Olivia then accuses Grace, who is visiting the resort with her father, who had once visited with his wife who has been dead for a few months. While Grace confesses to taking part in various aspects of the art thefts going on around the resort since the beginning, she states it is because of her father. Catharine is able to figure out that Gary, Grace's father, is the artist who has a piece featured at the resort. Grace confirms this, and says that the likeness of the masks on the piece of art are that of her mother, and that Gary wanted a piece of it because he was forgetting his wife.

Olivia then turns on Ellery, stating that she had already killed someone. Ellery is devastating, because although this is partly true, it was an accident. As a history teacher, she decided to coach the track team with a few other teachers, including Abby. They had been involved in an accident on the bus, and a student had died after Ellery had attempted to help her, mistakenly injuring her further to the point that she had died. But, then Olivia blames her mother, who confesses.

Catharine had been so upset about what happened when Ben left Olivia at the altar, that she went to confront him. Despite having believe that he was an innocent boy who steered away from drugs because of how his parents died, Catharine believed that he was under the influence of something. The two argued, and Ben fell backward after being pushed, hitting his head on a sculpture and Catharine left him there.

While all of this is happening, Ellery understands that Jason is also involved and is the one who killed Matt. After getting a gunshot wound to the shoulder after telling what she has now figured out, Jason is eventually subdued.

The following day, Abby arrives at the resort after they are able to get communication back to the resort. They will be leaving within the next few days, and Ellery is happy to be leaving behind the drama that unfolded, and returning to her children, and she is finally ready to let go of Luke, and move on with her life with the slew of new friends she has made while staying at Broken Point.

[football-writing]

I love you where love is celebrated

Summary: Part 3 of the series already! Y/N accompanies Mason to a wedding. 

Warnings: wedding scenes, some curse words probably. Mason’s mother knows too much and Mason can’t tie a tie for his life :p 

“Y/N, sweetie, it’s so good to see you again.” Mason’s mother greeted her as they hugged briefly.

“You too. Mason will be down any second.” She notified his mother. They’d come to his cousin’s wedding together, Mason stating that he had to bring a date or all his relatives would nag him about getting a girlfriend. Seeing as she had met most of his family already, and didn’t mind spending a weekend with her usually very busy best friend, she agreed. So far they had spent most of the rehearsal dinners joined at the hip.

But now Mason was still in their shared hotel room for the weekend, no doubt still doing his hair. How he took longer than her to get ready was a mystery to all. 

“I was hoping he’d come with a girlfriend, but I guess he isn’t ready to ask yet.” 

“I’m sorry, she’s had too much already.” Mason’s father interjected his wife. She took another sip of her wine in silent protest, which earned her a laugh from her husband.

Y/N made a mental note to ask Mason about what his mother meant later. She smiled fondly as she watched his parents laugh together. They had found true love, and it made her wonder if she’d have the same kind of loving, goofy relationship in 30 or so years. 

But those thoughts were interrupted as someone tapped on her shoulder. 

She turned around to see Mason standing in front of her. He was wearing a dark suit with a white dress shirt and a tie that matched her dress. His hair was gelled back and he had a lazy grin on his face. Fuck, he looked hot. 

“Well, well, look who decided to show up.” She said, grinning. 

“Takes a while to look this good.” The wink he sent her way almost made her forget her comeback. 

“Really? Looking this good comes natural to me.” 

He chuckled as he went in to hug her.

“You do look beautiful, you know.” He whispered in her ear as they parted again, her hands coming down from around his neck to rest on his chest.

He meant it too. Her dress complimented her figure beautifully, and her hair and make-up were done to perfection. He had seen her in sweats with her hair up in a messy bun and thought she was gorgeous then, but now she looked truly breath-taking.

“Your tie is a bit crooked though.”

“Are you kidding me? I redid it like five times.” He said as he threw his head back in frustration.

He felt her fingers wrap around his tie then, and when he looked back at her, her eyes were trained on his tie, fixing it for him. He couldn’t help but admire her. How attentive she was, and how cute she looked when she was focused. It didn’t even take her long to fix his tie for him.

“There, all set.” She stated as she put it into place for him.

“A woman that can tie a tie, every man’s dream.” He joked before thanking her.

Lucky for her all guests were asked to attend the ceremony just then, so that she could walk towards their seats and Mason wouldn’t see the blush that adorned her cheeks at his compliment. 

The ceremony was beautiful. Mason and her sat together as the brides spoke about their love for each other. Halfway through she had reached across her armrest to absentmindedly stroke his forearm that was exposed due to his rolled up sleeve. He was well aware of her touch. It was gentle and sweet, and he felt the need to hold her hand in his instead.

So he turned his hand open for her to take. As their fingers intertwined they listened to the words of love and admiration from the brides. He wondered if a moment between them had ever felt so right before.

And when it was finally time for the kiss, and everyone stood up to applaud the newlyweds, he had to reluctantly let go of her hand to applaud too.

Was he supposed to feel this way about his best friend? 

Fuck. 

Was he in love with her? 

[irishseeeker]

                                       the story of us

summary:  Five times Kate Sheffield and Anthony Bridgeton were just friends and one time they were more.

find chapter 1 here or here

find chapter 2 here or here

find chapter 3 here or here

find chapter 4 here or here

---

chapter 5: part 1-I think I’ve seen this film before, and I didn’t like the ending.

Kate was sitting on Anthony’s couch, wearing a dinosaur hat and drinking a glass of wine.

A very normal thing for a twenty five year old to do on a Thursday night.

She had managed to get out of the office at a reasonable seven o’clock tonight, as opposed to her usual nine. Agatha Danbury, her boss and career idol, had pushed her out of the office and told her to go out and have a drink.

She never specified with whom, so a glass of white wine with Newton seemed perfectly acceptable.

She had expected Anthony to be home but he had texted her earlier that he wouldn’t be home until late.

That had become a common occurrence lately. He was definitely avoiding her. He sometimes never came home at all.

The anxiety was clawing at her, she wanted to know where he was and what he was doing but he kept his explanations vague and usually to do with work. More specifically, who he was doing. They had never been too intimate on the details of their sex lives but Kate couldn’t stop herself from wondering. He hadn’t brought anyone home in the two months she had lived here.

Was she in his way? This was his flat, after all. She had long overstayed her welcome and his disappearing act had confirmed that. Anthony would never tell her that, he was too good of a person and he really didn’t understand boundaries. Kate had clearly overstepped his.

Her thoughts had been confirmed when she had found a hotel key on the floor of their bathroom. It was still in its slip, the date written on the paper was only last week. Why would he stay at a hotel fifteen minutes away from his flat?

Kate knew why.

It wasn’t her.

She poured herself another glass of wine.

She was going to miss the flat.

Kate had slowly woven herself into his flat over the past two months. She had her favourite spot on the couch, the corner of the couch with the perfect view of the television. She had her favourite stool at the kitchen counter, where she could watch Anthony cook and feed Newton bits off her place. She knew Anthony’s morning routine so well she knew exactly what time to jump out behind the bathroom door to scare him.

Newton even had a favourite spot, amusingly in Anthony’s favourite armchair. He had spent a few thousand pounds on a gorgeous grey, L shaped sofa that could fit his whole family yet he always sat on the old, brown cracked leather plush armchair. Kate had found out a while ago it had been his dad’s old armchair, Violet had had it refurbished slightly and had given it to Anthony for his birthday this year.

Her first mistake was becoming too comfortable.

It was dangerous. She had let herself fall too deep into her fantasy and the dread of reality was slowly creeping up on her. This wasn’t real life. She was a twenty five year old woman hopelessly in love with her best friend who didn’t feel the same about her. He was letting her stay while she figured it out.

What was wrong with her? Kate had told herself after her first week staying here she would find somewhere to live. She felt guilty, invading Anthony’s space but he really hadn’t seemed to mind. If anything, he was encouraging it. He found something wrong with every single flat Kate had visited until she finally found the perfect one within her budget.

She had always worried that Anthony was lonely here since Simon had left. She knew he had been, he had spent more time at her flat in the last few months than he had since the day she moved in. Anthony was not someone who was used to being alone.

He probably didn’t want her here, he just wanted someone here. She was in the way now and if she stayed here any longer, it was just going to get worse. It felt like Anthony was deliberately avoiding her, he had barely been around lately and when he was, it was like it wasn’t really here. They had their moments, they always would-but something was wrong.

Kate had found excuse after excuse to delay moving out until she had woven a perfect web of her own downfall.

Her second mistake? That was moving in with her best friend who she was desperately in love with.

Kate was still right where she was when she was eighteen years old.

Hopelessly in love with Anthony Bridgerton and there was absolutely nothing she could do about it.

It had consumed her. It had become a part of her. She loved him like she took her first breath every morning. She loved him like when she made her first coffee of the morning, with a splash of milk and a tiny bit of sugar. She loved how he texted like he was your grandad, with perfect grammar and punctuation. He still asked her what emojis meant. She loved every single thing about him, even the things that drove her up the wall like his non-existent patience and how he left his plates and mugs always in the sink instead of putting them into the dishwasher.

She just loved Anthony Bridgerton.

Kate had been doing it for eight years and she was so good at it.

It was almost sweet, if it wasn’t so tragic.

It wasn’t logical. It wasn’t practical. Despite him being her best friend, Anthony had always been clear about his stance on relationships. He didn’t do them. He hadn’t since his disastrous one with Siena. Whenever someone mentioned love or marriage, his face would turn into a stony expression and his upper lip would curl in slight disgust.

He didn’t want that.

Kate did, she desperately did-but she wanted it with him.

Her new flat would be ready in two weeks, the owner was still finishing renovations. In two weeks, she would move out of his flat and possibly tell Anthony she was in love with him.

Would the truth set her free? Or would it just cause her to lose Anthony forever?

Kate heard the front door close, snapping her out of her inner hell and it was followed by a few swear words and Anthony muttering under his breath as he walked into the living room.

“Those bloody deathtraps,” Anthony muttered, a scowl on his face as he appeared at the door of the living room. He was talking about her roller skates, she had gone to Hyde Park again with Edwina over the weekend. Kate was absolutely rubbish, but it was fun. “You’re going to break a bone in those things.”

“At least I’ll look cute while doing so.” Kate grinned at him, peeking her head over the top of the couch. She had bought a retro purple pair off Amazon, that reminded her of Grease and the 60s.

Anthony was staring at her with an amused expression, leaning against the wall. Kate knew Anthony’s strange behaviour wasn’t completely because of her. He had been acting strange since he made up with Daphne and Simon.

“Kate?”

“Mm?”

“Why are you wearing a dinosaur hat?”

She had forgotten about the hat two wine glasses ago.

Kate Sheffield, constantly oozing sex appeal.

There was really no explanation. “I have a better question. Why wouldn’t I be wearing a dinosaur hat?”

“Touche.” Anthony chuckled, opening up the fridge and pulling out a beer. He loosened the tie around his neck, unbuttoning the first few buttons of his shirt with one hand as he made his way towards his armchair. He picked up Newton under his arm, who had been happily snoozing on his armchair before Anthony interrupted him.

Anthony sat down, putting Newton back down on his lap. He had long given up fighting Newton for his armchair. It was their armchair now.

Well, it would be for another two weeks.

“I was packing and I found the party bag from Hyacinth’s party,” Kate explained, tipping the cowboy hat on her head that had a Tyrannosaurus Rex’s head coming out of the top of it. Kate didn’t miss the frown on his face when she mentioned packing up her stuff, but she dismissed it. It didn’t mean anything. She threw the spare hat over to him. “Did you really think I wouldn’t have one for you?”

Anthony stared at the hat that had landed on the couch beside him with vague disgust. “There’s not a chance in hell I’m wearing that.”

“Why? It looks like you,” Kate teased, reaching up to pinch the dinosaur’s spotty nose on the top of her head. “Go on. Aw, he’s got your nose.”

Anthony couldn’t help the smile that broke out on his face, as much as he was trying to fight it. It made Kate feel warm, she felt like she hadn’t seen it in a while. This felt good. It felt like them. “Is this how you treat people who give you a roof under your head out of the goodness of their heart? By insulting their good looks?”

“That doesn’t make any sense, though. You gave me a roof under my head.”

Anthony picked up the hat and slammed it onto his head. “I know you find me good looking, Kate. Just admit it.”

Kate chose to ignore the fluttery feeling inside of her stomach and the frustration building up inside of her. He was now flirting with her when he had been acting so off with her for the past two weeks? How was that fair? This wasn’t just them having a laugh. Kate may have feelings for Anthony, but she didn’t delude herself into thinking he was flirting with her when he wasn’t. He had always been a flirt. She was too, usually only with him. She would play it off, like she always did. “Hmm. Maybe to some people.”

Teasing was easier than telling the truth. Kate wasn’t confident he found her good looking, she wasn’t his usual type. In fact, she was the opposite to any girl she had ever seen him with. Kate was so forgettable he had forgotten their kiss.

Kate picked up her phone, taking a few quick pictures of Anthony and then flipping the camera to take a few pictures of her smiling with a disgruntled looking Anthony in the background.

She put the phone down, laughing her arse off and smiling at him very satisfied. “I’ll show them at your wedding.”

“I hope you do.”

There was a moment of silence where they both just stared at each other, his words lingering in the air. His tone wasn’t teasing or sarcastic, it was gritty and left a bitter taste in her mouth. It was also very confusing. Kate had no idea how to respond to him so she just...didn’t. Anthony quickly broke the silence, changing the topic completely.

“That reminds me. I just got back from having a drink with Simon.”

Kate wasn’t expecting that. Kate moved across the couch towards him, pushing herself up onto her knees once she reached him. She lifted her hand to inspect his neatly shaven jaw, she would really find any excuse to touch him. “I don’t see any bruises.”

“Funny.” Anthony said dryly, his eyes following her hand until they locked eyes with hers.

Kate laughed, choking on the intensity of the brief eye contact and fell back onto the couch, taking another sip of her wine. “I know, I’m considering pursuing stand-up comedy full time. What did Simon want?”

Things had improved between Anthony and Simon since they made up at Hyacinth’s birthday party three weeks ago. They were civil and spent time together when they all hung out together, but things weren’t the same and they still had a lot of rebuilding to do. They definitely weren’t back to hanging out together like they did before their fight.

“Simon just told me he’s going to ask Daphne to marry him.”

Kate spat out her wine.

Anthony’s jaw dropped before he quickly jumped out of his armchair, causing Newton to growl at him for waking him up. “Kate, that’s a leather couch!”

Kate spluttered, coughing as the wine she had just choked on continued to tickle her throat. “I’m sorry. Forget the couch. What did you just say?”

Anthony had run into the kitchen to grab paper towels, dabbing at the wet stains on the couch. It was only white wine, so it wouldn’t stain. He also handed her a glass of water, his expression strained as he roughly wiped at the couch. “He told me he was going to propose to Daphne this weekend.”

Kate stared at Anthony as if he had grown another head and an arm on his leg. “Did someone drop him on his head? Daph turned twenty two last week! He’s barely twenty six! I watched him laugh at a video of a dog swimming in a duck costume last week for twenty minutes. He can’t get married.”

Once again, Anthony shrugged. This was the man who had punched his best friend for going near his sister and refused to speak to both of them for two months. He simply shrugged. “Well, he plans to.”

“Why are you so calm?” Kate narrowed her eyes. Anthony was far calm about this. He had punched Simon and ignored him for two months when he had found out about Daphne and him. “Does anyone know Simon’s current whereabouts?”

Anthony’s deadpanned expression made a small smile creep onto Kate’s shocked face. “Seriously, it’s like a comedy night here.”

“Did you kill him?” When the opportunity presented itself, Kate would always wind up Anthony Bridgerton further. She also knew that he was probably feeling extremely frustrated and hurt and was showing a surprising level of self-control, so it wasn’t the worst idea to lighten the mood.

“No,” Anthony said, twisting his nose and mouth into a taunting smile. “But I might kill you.”

“Please, you couldn’t live without me.” Kate retorted with a teasing smile, but the eerie silence that followed quickly killed any amusement in her face. Anthony looked exhausted. Things had been strange between them but the dark bags under his eyes and the deflated look on his face showed Kate something more. She knew Anthony and she knew he was keeping something from her.

“He’s asking her in Paris this weekend,” Anthony explained, focusing on stroking Newton’s fur instead of looking at Kate. “That’s where he’s taking her for her surprise birthday trip. It’s perfect for her. Daph loves Paris.” “How do you feel about it?” Kate asked, caution filling her voice as she carefully observed Anthony. His body language was usually difficult to read and tonight was no exception. She knew he was upset but Anthony kept his walls high and guarded. She could never truly tell what he was feeling, whether it was that he wanted to scream or cry.

Anthony let out a deep sigh. “Would I rather set myself on fire than watch them get married? Yes. Do I think they’re rushing into it and incredibly young? Absolutely. Can I do anything about it? No. It’s their life. I can’t stop them. It doesn’t take a genius to know what I think about it but it’s not my decision to make. I’ll have to support them. I don’t want to fight anymore.”

Kate didn’t know what she would do if Edwina told her she was engaged.She’d probably have a heart attack. She was even younger than Daphne. She would probably drag Edwina back down the aisle, if she even let her get up it first.

“Mum is already planning their engagement party. She’s thrilled, of course. Simon spoke to her before me. Their party is going to be next weekend and then Ben’s gallery opening is the following Saturday.”

Kate nodded, biting her lip as she watched Anthony carefully. “What did he say to you?”

“Firstly, he asked me not to punch him. Then he said Daphne and him had already spoken about it. He wouldn’t propose if it wasn’t something Daphne wanted. He said he loved her so much and that he would always take care of her. He apologized for the timing considering things have only gotten civil again but he just couldn’t wait anymore,” Anthony said, sitting back down in his armchair and letting Newton settle back down in his lap. “He said he didn’t want to wait anymore when he knew Daph was the one. Why would he wait any longer when the love of his life was right in front of him?”

Simon did have a point. It was a difficult point for Kate to swallow but he had a point. Why was she waiting? Fear was becoming an exhausting reason.

In Kate’s opinion, they were far too young and they had only been together for nearly two years. This was Simon’s first serious relationship. It was ludicrous. Yet, it wasn’t her life. Her opinion didn’t matter here. They were taking control of their narrative and doing what was right for them. “Wow,” She murmured, not really knowing what else to say. It was a lot to take in. What happened to the teenager Kate had met eight years ago in Aubrey Hall? When had they all grown up so much? “I know this is probably a stupid question but are you okay?”

Newton stood up in Anthony’s lap, putting his two ginger paws on his chest and nuzzling his face against Anthony’s chest and face. He licked him a few times, which Anthony usually protested about but he was quiet tonight. Newton was trying to hug him. He always comforted Kate like that when she was upset. Newton just knew when something was wrong.

He was an angel, her Newton.

“I’m not really sure.” Anthony said honestly, smiling softly and rolling his eyes as Newton licked his cheek and chin, his paws pushing against Anthony’s chest as he tried to climb up further.

“That’s okay,” Kate gave Anthony a small smile, laughing softly as Anthony pushed Newton up by his bum until the corgi was half sitting on his shoulders and head. “I’ll be here if you need me.”

Anthony gave her a small grateful smile back, managing to get a scrambling Newton off his head and back onto his lap. When Anthony was around, Newton gave him his full attention. Kate didn’t blame the corgi at all. “You always are. Thanks, Kate.”

They exchanged a soft smile but no more words on the topic, despite the feeling that there was so much left unsaid between them.

“I can’t believe Daphne is getting married.”

Edwina zoomed in on the photo on Daphne’s instagram, the large diamond on her finger in front of her and Simon’s beaming faces with a glittering Eiffel Tower in the background. Kate had met up with Daphne for lunch yesterday and she had seen the ring in person, along with the detailed account of every minute of their trip and the proposal.

It was finally the weekend and Kate had spent Saturday morning roller skating-well, mostly falling with a side of skating-around Hyde Park with Edwina. They had gone back to her flat with takeaway kebabs and coffees, where she was staying with her boyfriend until her university term ended. Edwina was going to move back to their family home for the summer and stay with Kate in London when she wanted to, as Kate had decided to get her own flat for the first time.

Sophie was staying with Benedict for the summer, they seemed to be very happy and working through their problems. Since the Bridgertons owned Benedict’s flat, Sophie was insisting on paying for the utilities and groceries to pay her way. They were compromising and moving forward together. Edwina and Sophie were going to look for a flat at the end of the summer before university started, Sophie had finally saved up enough to enroll and start her course to become a teacher.

“Please don’t get any ideas.” Kate said, giving her a concerned look. Kate liked Edwina’s boyfriend Matthew a lot, he was a sweet guy and Edwina was head over heels for him, but they were not ready for marriage. Anthony had been uncharacteristically calm since he had found out about the engagement and it was very unnerving. It wasn’t like Kate could say much about Anthony these days, he was still avoiding her as much as possible. If they were together, it was rarely alone. Even at the flat, he had Hyacinth and Gregory over for a sleepover last night instead of their usual takeaway on Friday night.

Edwina snorted loudly. “As if. Mum only met Matthew last week. I don’t plan on getting married for a very long time.”

“I don’t know if I will ever get married.” It was true. Kate couldn’t see herself with anyone else. She had tried being with someone else and that had ended up in disaster. The cheating wasn’t her fault but her being in love with Anthony before and during her relationship meant it never stood a chance.

It was ridiculous to think about marriage at twenty-five years old when she had so much time and she was still so young. She just couldn’t imagine herself with anyone else.

“Please don’t say that,” Edwina’s voice softened as she spoke, so full of pity it made Kate feel ten times worse than she already did. She felt pathetic and she knew people found her pathetic. Her own sister pitied her. “Whether you want to get married is completely up to you. It’s not because there isn't someone out there for you. There is. You still have so much time, Kate.”

“I have time but I want him. He’s still avoiding me. I’ve barely seen him since Hyacinth’s birthday party. I found another hotel key this morning.” Kate wanted to scream at him, to hide his escapades better and not leave evidence of them out in plain sight where she could come across them. She had absolutely no right to be angry. But she was. She was incredibly hurt. She was doing this to herself. She couldn’t bring herself to say anything to him, as much as she wanted to scream it at him.

“Kate, you’re torturing yourself.”

Kate’s nails tapped against the edge of her mug, the light tapping nose soothing to her ears. The steam from the mug hit her face, but she wasn’t sure that was the reason why she was sweating. “I know, Ed.”

“You could tell him.”

Kate looked up at Edwina, her little sister who was so grown up in front of her. Kate felt like a child, coming to her sister when everything felt like it was falling apart. She felt so out of control, as if something was just on the brink of exploding and there was nothing she could do about it. “I can’t risk it.”

If she told him, she could risk losing him forever. It could break them in a way that could never be fixed. If he didn’t feel the same, her confession would be a shadow lingering over them that they couldn’t break free from.

Kate just dreaded the day he met the right girl that wasn’t her and she would have to stand there and watch.

How could she do that? Watch someone make him happy the way he made her happy? It was such a selfish thought but she couldn’t help it. Sometimes, Kate didn’t think she would be brave enough when the time would come.

Anthony was her best friend. He was her person. He didn’t owe her the love she felt for him. He already loved her in ways unimaginable, his friendship had been one of the best things that had ever happened to her. He had been her friend first and would always be her friend, but life without Anthony was unimaginable and she was doomed to watch him be happy with the perfect girl someday.

Their friendship had been something that Kate thought only existed in books and movies. She was so lucky to have him. She felt so guilty for how she felt, it wasn’t that she wasn’t grateful for what they had. She knew what they had was so special. Kate just wished it was more.

It would have to be enough.

Life with Anthony would always be better than life without him.

Edwina reached towards her with a comforting smile, her hand covering Kate’s hand and her thumb rubbing soothing circles on her wrist. “You can’t keep going on like this either.”

“I know.” Kate mumbled, exhaling loudly as her head fell back against the head of the couch.

“I don’t know how Anthony feels. You don’t know either. You’ll only know if you tell him how you feel. I know he’s your best friend, he’s like your other half. If you really want to know what I think,” Edwina paused before she continued speaking, as if she was debating what she was about to say. “I think he feels the same way about you. I really do. From what I’ve seen, I really do. Friends don’t look at friends the way he looks at you. I’ve never seen anything like it. I don’t think I’m the only one who thinks that either.”

Kate stared at Edwina, completely taken aback. It was the first time someone else, other than herself, had ever acknowledged the idea that Anthony might like her back. Well, that wasn’t exactly true. Anna had said it during their first year of university but Kate didn’t like to think about her. “I just don’t know, Ed. I don’t think he does. I only know how I feel and I just feel suffocated by it. I’m just so scared of the consequences of telling him.”

“Katie,” Edwina said softly, using the nickname for Kate she reserved for emotional moments between them. “I know you sometimes don’t think a lot of yourself, so I’m here to remind you of how wonderful you are. You’re an amazing person. He would be so lucky to be in love with you. I’m so lucky to love you. We’re all so lucky to be loved by you. Okay?”

Kate felt the sore lump forming in her throat, squeezing back the hand Edwina had wrapped around hers. She used her spare hand to brush the fresh tears out of her eyes. She hated crying, but she couldn’t help it. Edwina’s words meant more than Kate could ever express. It was hard to hear them sometimes, especially when Kate struggled to believe they were true. “Thanks, Ed. I love you too.”

“Good. I mean it. Would it really be so bad?” Edwina asked, tilting her head slightly as she nudged Kate’s foot with hers, forcing Kate to look at her. She knew Edwina was right. It had been too long. This had been going on for too long. If there was a chance they could be something, she should take it. “To tell him?”

It would. “I could lose him.”

Edwina didn’t respond for a few moments, the silent seconds suffocating Kate even further. “You already sound lost to me.”

“I know,” Kate said softly, the weight of the truth in her sister’s words making her chest feel tight. She felt lost and she felt stuck. She caught a glimpse of her watch and pushed herself up off the couch, sighing softly. “I better get going. I have to walk shower and get ready for later. We’re going to the Bridgertons later to have dinner to celebrate their engagement. We’re helping Daphne and Simon with their engagement party invitations as well.”

“Kate,” Edwina said, walking Kate to her door and wrapping her arms around her sister, pulling her into a deep hug. Kate didn’t know how much she needed one until it was happening, she pulled Edwina closer. “I only want what’s best for you. I’ll always have your back and support you. I just want you to be happy.”

“I know, Ed. I don’t know what I’d do without you. Oh! I nearly forgot. These are the tickets for Ben’s gallery he gave me for you two,” Kate said, pulling out the envelope and handing it to Edwina with a wink. She didn’t want to be sad anymore. She’d push it away for now. “It starts at seven, black tie. Free booze.”

“Thank you so much,” Edwina said, beaming at Kate as she squeezed the envelope. “Matt is such a fan of Benedict’s instagram, he stalks his instagram all the time. He’s going to be so excited.”

“It’s going to be a good night,” Kate said, pulling on her hoodie and raising her eyebrows at her sister. “Who knows what will happen?”

Later that evening, they were at the Bridgertons to celebrate Daphne and Simon’s engagement. It was the Bridgertons and Sophie, Kate and Simon. Kate felt so full after the feast Violet had prepared she could barely move.

Kate didn’t even protest as Anthony stole bits of her cake off her plate, if she ate anymore she felt like she would burst out of her red dress.

“I don’t understand why we’re posting these out. Haven’t you already emailed invitations?” Eloise asked, a permanent scowl had been glued to her face since Daphne had dragged her to the dining room table after dinner along with Kate, Anthony, Simon, Ben and Sophie to help seal their invitations.

“Yes, but they’ll need these to get into the party,” Daphne said, giving Eloise a look as she carefully tied the pink ribbon around the lace envelope in her hands. “Besides, it’s part of the process. We’ll have these forever. I already have a copy in my wedding book.” Kate had even spent a few moments admiring the large princess cut diamond on Daphne’s finger. It was massive and blinding in the bright lighting.

They had each been given a part of the alphabet from the guest list, which was in alphabetical order and consisted of at least two hundred people. If this was the engagement party list, the wedding was going to be massive.

“How do you know this many people?” Kate was only responsible for the A to Ds and she hadn’t even started the Cs and they had been at this for nearly two hours. The invitations were beautiful, they were on expensive hard paper that was a soft blue. The writing on the invitation was a beautiful cursive font that was sealed in a cream lace envelope, tied with a rose ribbon.

“Well, Daphne is a Bridgerton. Simon is technically a Hastings,” Anthony said, his nose scrunched up in concentration as he tried to loop the pink ribbon around the invitation. Simon had never gone by his father’s name Hastings, he had always gone with his mother’s maiden name. “We’re popular people.”

Anthony shot a glare at Eloise as she muttered wanker under her breath.

“This is only the engagement party. The wedding won’t be until next summer and there’s so much to plan and do in the meantime,” Daphne said, looking frazzled as she tucked her pile of envelopes neatly into the box on the table. “We’re not going to rush anything.”

Anthony and Benedict simultaneously snorted and Sophie and Kate kicked them under the table.

“Speaking of things to do,” Daphne said, standing up and putting her hands on her hip. “Kate.”

“Daphne,” Kate replied, eyeing her warily. Daphne was smiling so widely it almost looked painful, positively beaming at Kate. “Are you okay?”

“I’m perfect,” squealed Daphne, clapping her hands together. Kate shot a confused glance at Anthony, who shrugged back at her with an amused glint in his eyes. “I need you to close your eyes for a second.”

“Okay,” said Kate, closing her eyes hesitantly and lifting her hands up slightly in the air. “If anyone puts anything near my face, or on my face, I will hurt you.”

“Open! Read the envelope!”

There was a loud smack as something was put in front of her, Kate opened up her eyes to see a large hamper in front of her. It was a soft pink, a wooden hamper wrapped in film and topped with a large pink bow. It had an envelope with her name cursively written on the front. She could see an assortment of candles, hand cream, soaps, body lotion, chocolate, sweets, a silk dressing gown and slippers and other things in the hamper. There was also a beautiful bouquet of red tulips. Kate was so confused. “It’s not my birthday.” She said slowly, reaching and opening up the envelope.

>i>Kate,

Will you be my bridesmaid?

Lots of love,

Daphne

“Oh my gosh.” Kate managed to say, words completely failing her as she glanced up at Daphne’s beaming face and back down at the invitation. There was no stopping the wave of emotion that crept up her throat and flooded her eyes as she constantly re-read the words in front of her.

“Oh Kate,” Daphne said softly, one of her hand’s covering her heart as she rested her head on top of Kates, wrapping her arm around her. “Please don’t cry.”

“I’m not crying!” Kate said quickly, keeping her head down to avoid anyone seeing her red, watery eyes but it was definitely too late. She hugged Daphne back, practically clinging to her. This meant so much to her. “It’s hayfever.”

Kate didn’t have to look at Anthony’s smug face to know he was smirking as he spoke. “It’s January.”

Kate turned to Anthony to glare at him. “Eat glass.”

Anthony chuckled softly, nudging Daphne off of Kate and wrapping his arm around her shoulder as she furiously wiped at her eyes. She shoved him off but couldn’t stop the smile breaking out on her face as Anthony smiled down at her.

“Are you sure?” said Kate, looking up finally and meeting Daphne’s warm eyes and beaming face. “I would love to. Thank you so much. This is incredible. This is...so nice. I don’t know what to say. Thank you.”

Kate had never thought for a second she would be asked. She had struggled with making friends for most of her life, it wasn’t that she didn’t have them-she had quite a few. Anthony was the closest friend she had ever had and with him, she had become a part of something that had allowed her to form friendships and relationships with his family that were more than just her connection to Anthony.

It really meant everything.

“Oh, Kate.” Daphne said softly, squeezing her shoulders softly and wiping a tear trailing down her cheek that had escaped her eye. “Of course I want you to be my bridesmaid. It wouldn’t be the same without you.”

She didn’t really know what to say. Her entire life had just been her Dad, Mary and Edwina and friends who had come and gone, and suddenly there was the whole Bridgerton clan who sent her birthday presents and Christmas cards, who invited her over for dinner and texted to meet up or just to catch up.

It was really wonderful to be liked by people like the Bridgertons.

“I’m so happy. I’ve asked everyone now!” Daphne smiled in satisfaction, walking back over to her seat and shooting a smile at Simon, who was gazing at her adoringly. “I’ve asked Fran, you, El, Rebecca, Alana, Tara and Greta. You’re definitely the best reaction I’ve had so far. Some people were less than satisfactory.” Daphne shot a pointed look at Eloise.

“Oh, get over it Daphne,” Eloise grumbled, struggling to tie a ribbon around an envelope. “I said yes, didn’t I?”

“This is all incredible. Thank you so much. These are absolutely beautiful,” said Kate, looking through the hamper in wonder as she picked up everything and smelt it or ate it. “Tulips are my favourite flower.”

Daphne glanced at Anthony, who had been gazing at Kate as she looked through her hamper. He met his sister’s eyes questionably. “Just a lucky guess.” She exchanged a smirk with Simon, who looked down at his stack of envelopes in amusement.

“We’re expected to bring dates?” Eloise asked, looking around the table with an exasperated look as she waved an invitation in the air. It appeared that she only just read the invitations. “Everyone is in a relationship except me. How am I meant to find one of those?”

“By asking someone.” Benedict suggested, slightly mocking his sister who flipped him off.

Eloise scowled. “I don’t like people.”

“I’m sure you’ll find someone,” Anthony said, clearly unimpressed about the thought of his sister bringing someone to the wedding. “The wedding will be after your first year at university. You’ll find someone you can’t shake, as much as you try to.”

Anthony shot a grin at Kate, who stuck her tongue out at him.

“Why don’t you bring Penelope? She’s lovely.” Kate suggested, turning away from Anthony and tying another bow around an envelope. She was nearly on the C part of her list.

“That’s easy for you two to say,” Eloise grumbled, leaning back in her chair and crossing her arms. “You two don’t have to worry about a date. Oh! Pen is actually a good idea. She loves romance and all that rubbish.”

Anthony paused trying to tie his ribbon, where he using Kate’s finger to tie the bow. He frowned at Eloise. “Why wouldn’t we?”

“Why wouldn’t you what?”

“Why wouldn’t we have to worry about a date?”

Eloise shrugged, frowning slightly at her brother’s question. “Oh. I presumed you’d be going together.”

“Why would you presume that?” Anthony asked, his tone a little sharper than usual.

“Anthony, stop.” Kate murmured, frowning at his tone of his voice and just his overall demeanor. What the fuck was so offensive about that presumption? It was completely fair. They went to nearly everything together. Every gala, every work event, even two weddings last year.

“Well, you two do everything together, Anthony.” Eloise replied sharply back, a slightly challenging look on her face as a response to her brother’s blunt tone and slight attitude. Kate glanced at Sophie, who widened her eyes slightly before focusing on organizing her stack of envelopes. “What’s your problem?”

“I’ve no problem at all,” Anthony gave her a dry smile, a stone cold look on his face. His phone started to ring, vibrating against the table. “Excuse me. Anthony Bridgerton.” He stood up, walking out of the dining room to take his call.

“What is with him lately?” Eloise asked the table, a disgruntled look on her face as she organized her finished envelopes into Daphne’s box. “He’s been more moody and off than usual.”

It seems like Kate wasn’t the only one who had noticed something was wrong. She caught Benedict’s eye, who shrugged but he glanced at the door where Anthony had disappeared through.

Kate shook it off, but she was internally panicking. She had presumed they would be going to the wedding together. Her dating life had been dead for two months. She hardly bothered anymore, she just didn’t see the point.

They could be an amazing person, but they would never be Anthony.

It was rather pathetic. She knew it was. She needed to cut the final string and tell him how she felt. If he didn’t feel the same, at least she would be free. But how could she? How could she risk losing him forever? She would rather have the parts of him she could have than none of him at all.

Or did she?

Kate wasn’t so sure anymore.

Anthony was gone for longer than expected. Kate had gone to check on him once but he had disappeared into his father’s study, closing the door behind him. He walked back into the room twenty minutes later, clearing his throat to interrupt the small chatter around the table. He looked furious. “Colin has been arrested.”

“Oh my god.”

“What happened?”

“Is he okay?”

“He was arrested for public indecency and public intoxication. He’s fine. We’re going to bail him out now. He’s not going to be charged. It’s been sorted. I’ve told Mum, she’s on her way home.”

“Isn’t he out on a date with Marina?” Sophie asked, raising an eyebrow at Benedict and at the rest of the table. Kate had only met Marina once, who was Colin’s new girlfriend he had met skiing in France over Christmas. He was head over heels in love with her, the first girl according to Anthony he had ever brought home to meet his family.

Daphne shook her head, running a hand through her head and sighing loudly. “I knew there was something off about that Marina girl. Poor Colin.”

“Poor Colin? He’s the one who got himself arrested. I hardly think it’s Marina’s fault. This is Colin we’re talking about,” Eloise said, narrowing her eyes at Daphne. “I love him but he’s a fucking idiot.”

“Eloise!” Daphne exclaimed, gasping at her sister.

Benedict shrugged. “El has a point, Daph. Colin has broken about three bones from jumping off things drunk. Usually half-naked.”

There was a grimace around the table. That was a picture no one wanted to imagine.

Anthony was still standing there, unsettlingly calm and still. His phone was still in his hand, which was slightly shaking. He was staring into nothing as his siblings argued across the table.

“What can I do?” Kate asked in a lower voice, standing up to move beside him. She placed a comforting hand on his upper arm, but there wasn’t much she could do. Colin and Anthony’s relationship had always been complex. They were so close but very different people. This wasn’t a situation that Anthony

Anthony shook his head. “Nothing. It’s okay. Ben and Simon will come with me. We’ll be back soon.”

Kate couldn’t stop the hurt look that flashed across her face as she watched him gesture towards the boys and walk towards the door. Everyone else looked equally confused, mainly because he was asking Simon to come over Kate. Benedict shot Kate a small smile, offering a silent apology before following his brother. Simon quickly kissed Daphne before following them.

Kate sat there as Sophie and Daphne got updates from Ben and Simon. Her phone didn’t buzz once. Colin was okay and he would only have to pay a large fine. He had been with some of his friends who had also been arrested. Anthony had used one of his father’s connections to try to make sure the arrest wouldn’t be on his permanent record and one of Colin’s friends' dad was high in the police force and had made sure it wouldn’t be on any of their records.

It was two hours, at approximately 11pm, when the front door slammed followed by loud voices. They belonged to Anthony, Benedict and Colin.

“That’s not an excuse to throw your life away. You have one and a half years left.” Anthony was shouting at Colin, who stormed in before Anthony and let out an annoyed sigh as he noticed everyone was in the living room waiting for them. Daphne launched herself at Colin, wrapping him in a hug and flicking him in the head at the same time.

“You idiot! I thought you were out with Marina?” Daphne began her interrogation immediately after she had let go of Colin, her relief fading into a frown as she stared at Colin. “What happened? What were you thinking?

“Marina broke up with me,” Colin said, a hurt look splashing over his face and quickly disappearing, being replaced with a hard demeanor. “She was still in love with her ex-boyfriend and she had been seeing him. She dumped me and I met up with the boys afterwards. Things just got out of hand.”

“Oh Col,” Daphne murmured softly, shaking her head and giving him a reassuring smile. “I’m so sorry. It’ll be okay. Are you okay?”

“Colin,” Anthony announced loudly, ignoring the warning look from Violet who was glancing anxiously between Anthony and Colin. “Wants to drop out of university.”

“That’s the stupidest thing I have ever heard,” Eloise said quickly, staring at Colin with a mixture of shock and outrage. “You have one year left. Isn’t twenty-two sort of young to have a life crisis?”

“Stay out of it Eloise,” Colin barked, glaring at his sister before turning back around to Anthony. “It’s my life. I can do what I want with it.”

“Oh sure you can,” Anthony said, bitterly laughing as he poured himself a whiskey at the bar in the corner of the room. “You’re truly doing such a smashing job.”

“We all need to calm down.” Benedict said, intervening before this heated argument exploded. Anthony and Colin had always clashed heads when it came to Colin’s life decisions. He had been suspended twice during school and had been extremely difficult when it came to going to university. Kate had watched Anthony spend months trying to convince him to go and it had resulted in a lot of stress and arguments.

Sophie, Simon and Kate sort of sunk into the background. They were around the Bridgertons most of the time but this was a family situation they weren’t a part of. It was very uncomfortable to witness.

“We made a deal. You would get your gap year and I’d support you traveling after university, when you finished it. Your marks have been brilliant, Colin. It’s one bloody year. You have to get your degree.”

“Why? Because Dad did?”

“No,” Anthony said sharply, his jaw slightly shaking as he tried to remain calm. He looked like he was about to explode. “Because it’s a privilege. University degrees open up doors and give you opportunities. They give you protection and access to jobs. I have already paid for two years of your degree and now all your hard work is going to go down the drain because you’ve suddenly changed your mind? That’s not happening. You’re getting that degree.”

“I don’t need you to tell me what to do with my life, Anthony.”

“Why did you call me then?”

Colin paused. “What?”

“When you got arrested. Why did you call me?”

Colin stared at him. He didn’t have an answer to that.

“Why didn’t you call Mum? Or Ben? Or Daph? Or one of your friends.”

“Oh, now you’ve got nothing to say?” Anthony let out a high pitched laugh, shaking his head. “I’ll tell you why. You called me because I show up. I’ll sort it out for you. Like I always do. I’m beginning to think that was a big mistake. I honour my commitments. Why can’t you do the same?”

“We can discuss this in the morning when everyone is calmer and not so worked up,” Violet said, finally intervening and smiling calmly at Anthony and Colin. She wanted to stop this fight before it got too far, but it already had. Her tactic of pretending everything was fine was not going to work this time. “We need to all go home and go to bed. The little ones are sleeping and we’re not going to wake them.”

“Why aren’t you doing something?” Anthony asked, staring at his mother in bewilderment. He sounded so heartbroken and lost, almost desperate. “You’re the parent here. He’s about to throw his entire life away.”

“I’m not throwing my entire life away, I’m throwing away the life that you wanted for me. Not what I wanted.” “So what are you going to do then? Travel around for the rest of your life with no qualifications?” Anthony’s words were daggers, pushing Colin further and further over the edge. “With what money, Colin? I won’t give you a penny. You’ve never had a bloody job. You’ve never had any responsibilities. Wake the fuck up. You’re acting like a spoiled little brat.”

“Fuck you,” Colin snapped, Benedict’s hand moving towards his chest to push him away from Anthony. Benedict was in between them, Simon quickly joining him as well. “I’ll figure it out. I don’t need to try to be a carbon copy of Dad to figure out my life. I’m not you, Anthony. Desperately trying to be someone he’ll never be.”

“That’s bang out of order.” Simon snapped, standing up slightly and only stopping himself from moving forward when Daphne put a hand on his chest.

“Colin, that’s too far,” Benedict snapped, glaring at his younger brother with a look that made the hairs on Kate’s arms stand up. She stood up anyway, watching Anthony as his face completely fell. This was his achilles heel. He had been through a similar argument with . Colin knew exactly what he was doing. Bringing up their father was exactly how you hurt Anthony. “You’re not dropping out of university. It’s not an option. We all care about you. You’re hurt and probably still drunk. You’re not thinking rationally.”

“Stop it Colin, that’s not fair,” Daphne said, shaking her head. “I agree with Anthony. He wants what is best for you. We all do.”

“Anthony,” Kate said softly, grabbing her coat and his off the dining room chairs. “I think we should go home. Come on.”

Anthony completely ignored Kate. “What the fuck did you just say?”

Colin didn’t cower down. He stood his ground and stared blankly back at his brother. “I think you heard me.”

Kate couldn’t stop herself from glaring in disgust at Colin. This was too far. Anthony wasn’t being exactly fair, she knew university was something Colin had never been sure about. It wasn’t as if he was completely miserable. He was having the time of his life when he was there. He just was confused and heartbroken and he wanted to run away.

“Do you think I wanted this? Do you think I want to do this?”

It had gone too far and Anthony had finally reached his breaking point.

“I went to the parent teacher meetings. I made your lunches and dinners. I didn’t go on my gap year. You all got to go on your gap years. Do you know how I spent it? I was the one who sorted out Dad’s will. I took care of Mum when she couldn’t get out of bed. I took care of a newborn baby and a two year old. I took care of all of you. I did all that. Have I ever said anything about it? No. I did it because I had no choice. My dad died too.”

There was complete silence in the living room as everyone stared at Anthony’s outburst.

“Anthony.” Violet croaked, staring at her eldest son in disbelief. Violet hadn’t been well for the first few years after Edmund’s death. She had barely gotten out of bed , Anthony had said she was like a ghost. Anthony had really gotten involved in everything to do with his siblings from the moment his father died. He’d had no choice.

Kate knew the pain of losing someone you loved. She missed her father everyday. She couldn’t blame Violet for how she mourned the love of her life but she couldn’t help but resent her for what she forced her eldest son to do because she couldn’t. He had been a child too.

“Go ahead, Mum. Indulge him. It’s what you do best.” Anthony looked at his mother with a look of such disappointment, it was hard to watch. “It’s your life, Colin. Do whatever you want. I’m done.”

“Ant.” Ben pleaded, staring in disbelief at his brother’s outburst. Sophie had her arm around Eloise, who was crying into her shoulder. Anthony shook off Ben’s arm on his shoulder.

Anthony ignored him. “Kate, let’s go home.”

Kate couldn’t stop herself from throwing Colin a disappointed look as she followed Anthony out of the door, shooting the rest of the Bridgertons a sad smile before they walked out of the house. It was a promise to take care of him.

“Please, let me drive.” Kate said softly, slowly wrapping her arms around his hand to take the keys out of his hand. Thankfully, Anthony didn’t protest.

The drive home was completely silent. Kate tried to focus on the road but she couldn’t stop herself from glancing at Anthony in the passenger seat. He just stared straight ahead of him, not uttering a word to her the entire trip.

They entered the flat slowly, the only sound being the door closing and the rattle of the keys as Kate put them in the bowl beside the door. Anthony moved to sit on the couch as Kate made her way into the kitchen, making them both a cup of tea.

“I made you some tea,” She said, keeping voice low as she walked around the couch, anxiously staring at Anthony. She felt so helpless.

Anthony had his face in his hands, bent forward. He was shaking. Newton was pawing at his feet, whimpering slightly as nudged Anthony’s legs with his nose.

Kate blinked a few times before she realized what was happening.

Anthony was crying.

“I’m here.” She whispered, quickly putting the mugs down and sitting beside him, wrapping her arms around him. She pulled his head against her chest, holding him as tight as she could.

His sobs racked through his body, shaking and stuttering.

In the eight year she had known him, she had never seen Anthony cry. This wasn’t just crying. This was nine years of grief, hurt and emotion finally coming to the surface and breaking free.

She held him until he couldn’t cry anymore.

The following morning, Kate got up from the couch where Anthony, Newton and her were watching Ted Lasso when they heard a knock on the door. She had been texting the Bridgertons this morning, assuring them Anthony was doing okay. He was better than he was last night, he just seemed exhausted.

Kate was still reeling from the events of last night. When she opened the door, the last person she expected to see was Colin Bridgerton.

“Kate. Hi.”

Kate fixed him with a hard stare.

“I know what you’re thinking.”

“I’m actually debating whether I should punch you.”

“That’s fair.”

Kate shook her head. “Nothing about last night was fair, Colin. He didn’t deserve that.”

“I know,” He said, his voice wavering slightly as he looked down at the ground. He did look terrible. He hadn’t shaved this morning so there was a light shadow of stubble on his cheeks and dark bags under his eyes. He looked terrible and it made Kate feel slightly better. “I’m trying to fix it. Can I come in?”

“That’s not up to me.”

“It’s okay, Kate.” Her head flicked around to see Anthony standing behind her at the end of the hall. “He can come in.”

Kate stepped aside to let Colin in, closing the door behind him as she watched Colin cautiously walk towards his older brother. Anthony made his way towards the couch and Colin hoovered awkwardly before taking a seat on the opposite end of it.

Kate went to put on the kettle, leaning down to scratch behind Newton’s ears. He had his lead in his hand. It was about time for his walk.

“Can I’ve a cuppa?” Colin asked, glancing cautiously over at Kate and then back at Anthony.

Kate didn’t turn around. “I can’t promise I won’t spit in it.”

“Actually, I’m good.”

“Newton needs to go on his walk anyway,” Kate said, deciding that they probably needed time to talk alone. She was intruding and this wasn’t going to be an easy conversation for either of them. “I’ll leave you two to it. I’ll see you in a bit.”

Anthony turned around to look at her, smiling softly at her and nodding his head. He’d be okay. She grabbed her hoodie off the couch, quickly pulling it on. She smiled back at him before she headed for the door and left the two brothers to figure it out.

“Ready to go?”

“Here, let me help.” Kate said softly, reaching her hands up to fix Anthony’s blue tie. His white shirt was crisp and bright, complimenting the dark navy suit. Daphne’s dress code was anti-black tie, so Kate had gone with a lilac dress that reached her the middle of her knees.

Kate felt something crinkle under his shirt pocket and she raised an eyebrow. “What’s that?”

“Oh,” Anthony said, his cheeks darkening slightly. “It’s for my speech.”

Kate felt herself fall even harder. This man. “You made flashcards.”

“I just want to say the right thing.” He murmured, very flustered. Bless him, Anthony was nervous.

“You will,” Kate said reassuringly, fixing his jacket one last time before she let go. “Just speak from the heart.”

“Let’s go,” He said, his cheeks still slightly pink as he grabbed his keys. “Our uber is downstairs.”

Daphne and Simon’s engagement party was taking place in the ballroom of the Ritz Hotel in London. Their engagement announcement had been posted in the London Times and it had been the topic of the week all over magazines and social media. The party was going to be extravagant. They had an open bar, a three course meal and a live band.

“Oh my god.”

The ballroom was beautiful. Each wooden chair had flowers tied to the back of it, surrounding tables set with golden cutlery with a large rose centerpiece. The tables surrounded the large dancefloor, which had a live band playing on the stage in front of it. Kate could see Benedict and Sophie dancing in the distance.

“Is that an ice sculpture of their initials?” A large ice sculpture of a D and S stood in the middle of the room on a large white table.

“Daph knows how to plan a party,” Anthony said, shrugging as he gazed around the ballroom with a small smile. “Let’s find that open bar.”

It had been a week since his argument with Colin and their conversation the next morning had sorted it out. Anthony didn’t go into too much detail but it had been a very freeing conversation for the both of them. Colin had apologized and he decided he was going to stick with university. Anthony had been good since then. He wasn’t acting distant at all. If anything, he had spent a lot more time with Kate than he needed to.

“A whiskey and a vodka cranberry please,” Anthony said to the bartender, leaning against the bar once they made their way through the crowd after stopping to say hello to various guests. “I still can’t believe this is actually happening.”

She nodded. “I still can’t believe she asked me to be her bridesmaid.”

“I can,” He said it so bluntly, as if it’s obvious. “You’re family, Kate.”

They shared a small smile, that warm feeling fluttering widely inside of her stomach. “You’re my family too.”

“Before you ask,” Kate said, swiftly moving on from their heartfelt moment as it was a little too much to handle at the moment. Emotions made her hot and she couldn’t afford to sweat in this dress. She didn’t want to have to try dry her sweat patches in the bathroom again. “I am not going suit shopping with you.”

“Oh, no problem there,” said Anthony, a devilish smirk on his face. “You’ll be too busy dress shopping with Daphne.”

The smile dropped right off Kate’s face.

They were all sitting at their respective tables later in the evening during dinner. Dessert had been served and it was time for Anthony’s speech. The Bridgertons were at one large table in the centre of the room, along with Kate and Sophie. Gregory was sitting on Kate’s lap, since he had kept flicking peas at Hyacinth during dinner.

Anthony clinked his champagne flute, standing up and clearing his throat. “Hello, everyone. If we haven’t met, I’m Anthony Bridgerton. Brother of the bride and best friend of the groom.” Kate’s eyes flicked towards Simon, whose face broke out into a small smile he tried to contain. “On behalf of my family and Simon and Daphne, I would like to thank you all for joining us to celebrate their engagement.”

There was a loud clatter of hands clapping throughout the room before they faded softly as Anthony continued to speak. “Normally, this would be when the father of the bride would speak. Our father couldn’t be here with us today, so I’m afraid you’re stuck with me.”

There was a small ring of laughter around the room with a hint of sadness. Edmund Bridgerton’s absence

“I’ll make this quick as I know everyone is eager to dance and get back to the open bar. I’m incredibly proud to be Daphne’s brother. I’m also incredibly proud to be Simon’s best friend and best man. I’ve watched Daphne grow up and no one can take credit for the incredible woman she has become. I’m eternally grateful I have gotten to witness it.”

“I’ve known Simon since we were eleven years old. I’ve also witnessed Simon growing up, which really only started when he was twenty four years old.” There was another ring of laughter around the room, including Simons. Since Simon had stood up for Anthony during his argument with Colin, things had turned a new leaf with them. He had popped around the flat after Colin had gone to see Anthony. He had been over three times this week alone. It reminded Kate of how it was before.

He had even asked Anthony to be his best man yesterday during a round of golf.

“I’m very happy that you two have found each other. Finding the person you want to spend the rest of your life with and being brave enough to take that opportunity and hold onto it is a very admirable thing. It’s an incredible thing, to find someone who makes everything make sense.” Anthony cleared his throat, clearly a bit flustered. “I’d like to raise a glass to Daphne and Simon. I wish you both nothing but happiness and love for the rest of your lives. To Daphne and Simon.”

“To Daphne and Simon!” The crowd echoed as everyone raised their glass to the happy couple.

There was a loud round of applause, including Daphne and Simon standing up to hug Anthony after he finished his speech. Kate shot him a wide smile as Hyacinth dragged him onto the dancefloor as the band began to play. He had promised her to dance all evening and it was finally time.

Kate smiled as she watched Anthony dance with Hyacinth on the dancefloor. She was standing on his feet, giggling loudly as Anthony moved her around the dancefloor on his shoes. He also lifted her up, twirling her around.

“You look absolutely gorgeous tonight.”

Kate turned around, slightly startled and smiled as Violet Bridgerton sat down beside her. “Thank you. So do you. This is an incredible party.”

“I can’t believe my baby is getting married,” Violet said softly, smiling at Daphne and Simon dancing and laughing on the dance floor. “It seems like only yesterday she was asking me to tie her shoelaces. Now I’m helping her plan her wedding.”

Kate laughed softly, giving Violet a warm smile. “Please don’t let her put me in a poofy dress.”

Violet laughed loudly, shaking her head. “I promise. It’s the least I could do for you, Kate.”

Kate noticed how Violet’s tone dropped as she spoke and she turned to look at her in confusion.

“I owe you a great deal, Kate. After everything that happened last week,” Violet said, her voice trailing off slightly as she composed herself before continuing. “I truly realized that you have been the person who was there for Anthony like I should have been. I know I failed him. It’s something I will carry with me forever. I can only try to be better. I’m just incredibly grateful that you were there for him in ways I wasn’t.”

Kate opened her mouth to speak but she didn’t know how she could reply to that. She had to say something. “I always will be. You raised a very good person.”

“I’m glad you’re the longest relationship Anthony’s ever had.”

Kate turned to her, puzzled with slightly pink cheeks. “You mean friendship.“

Violet just smiled, a dangerous smile that made Kate anxious, and turned her head back to the dancefloor.

Kate downed her champagne glass in one gulp.

She made eye contact with Anthony across the room, who was now alone as Hyacinth ran off after Gregory outside towards the gardens. Anthony strode towards her, looking incredibly free and handsome in his suit. He extended his hand toward her. “Dance with me, Sheffield. Come on.”

Kate rolled her eyes, slipping her hand into his. “If I must.”

Anthony led her to the dancefloor, where they slowly swayed as the music turned to a slow song. Kate wrapped her arms around his neck, ignoring the intimacy of their current position. “That was quite a speech, Bridgerton.”

“Thank you,” Anthony said, smiling down at her as his hand moved to grip her waist. “I took someone’s advice and spoke from the heart.”

“She sounds really smart.”

“She’s a pain in the arse, actually.”

Kate stuck out her tongue, which only made Anthony laugh harder. “Thank you. It was good advice.”

“Your dad would have been proud. It truly was lovely.”

“Thanks, Kate.” He said softly, leaning his head forward until his chin rested lightly on the top of her head.

They swayed there until the music changed and Anthony begant to twirl her around. They were eventually joined by Edwina, Matthew and the rest of the Bridgertons. Everyone was laughing and dancing the night away.

It was one of the best nights of her life.

All the inner turmoil and anguish she had felt lately wasn’t at the surface for once. She still didn’t know whether she was going to tell Anthony how she felt. She didn’t want to think about it tonight. Anthony was smiling and he seemed to be himself again.

Kate had a feeling things were finally going to get better.

How wrong she was.

.

Henry Granville, a renowned English artist and owner of London’s famous galleries had contacted Benedict earlier in the year to set up a gallery of his photography in one of his galleries.

Benedict’s instagram fame had caught the attention of Henry, who asked Benedict to show him his portfolios and more of his photographs. They had set up the exhibit together. He had taken Benedict under his wing, he was helping Ben explore painting and improve his skills.

Tonight was the opening night of his photography exhibit in the gallery.

Kate had finally moved into her flat during the week, so scrambling through her boxes to try to find a suitable dress and heels was a challenge but she finally looked presentable by the time Anthony arrived in their Uber to pick her up.

She went with white heels and a long black bodycon dress she wore to meetings with their most expensive clients at work. Art was for posh people, so Kate presumed the dress code was extra-fancy tonight. She wasn’t taking any chances.

Kate was waiting on the path as Anthony and the uber pulled up. She opened up the door, grinning at him and twirling. “Do I look like someone who understands art?”

“Absolutely,” Anthony said, laughing at her as he scooted over to let her climb in. “All you need is an easel and a paintbrush and I wouldn’t be able to tell the difference. You look great, by the way.”

Kate blushed slightly, biting her lip. “You don’t look so bad yourself.”

“What do you know about art?”

Absolutely piss all. “I know that guy. Leonardo DiCaprio?”

Anthony snorted. “DaVinci.”

“That’s the one.”

They arrived at the gallery, which was already packed as the opening night was in full swing. They made their way through the gallery until they found Benedict, who had a beaming Sophie beside her.

Kate gave her a big hug, grinning at her. “Excuse me. We’re in a gallery and I’m looking at a masterpiece.”

“Oh stop it,” Sophie said, laughing at her as she wrapped her arms around Kate and kissed her cheek. Sophie’s long blonde hair lay in bouncy curls down her back and she was wearing a beautiful silk baby blue dress. “You look absolutely beautiful, Kate.”

“I’m proud of you.” Anthony said, ruffling Benedict’s hair and putting him in a headlock.

Kate reached up to hug him, “It’s amazing. Seriously Ben, well done.”

“Have you been around fully yet?”

Kate shook her head. “No, not yet. We just got here.”

Benedict gave Anthony and Kate a strange look. “I’ll catch up with you two before you get to the last piece. The exhibit starts over there.”

Kate shot Anthony a questioning look but he just shrugged, nodding as he clapped Benedict on the shoulder as they headed towards the

The exhibit was fantastic. The photographs were incredible. It was an exhibit of life. There was a lot from his travels in recent years, from Africa to the Alps. He had pictures of animals from his trip around Africa two years ago. There was a picture of Sophie laughing, with her head tilted back and her wavy hair floating in the air. There was a picture of Anthony, with Hyacinth on his shoulders and Gregory in his arms.

When Kate finally saw the last photo, Benedict’s strange behaviour earlier suddenly made a lot of sense.

It was a picture of them.

It was titled eight years.

It was a large canvas. Every part of the canvas was covered in pictures of them and some faded into the background. They were pictures taken throughout the years, taken by Benedict. They were laughing at each other in most of them, with faces looking at each other and not at the camera.

Kate felt so incredibly overwhelmed. From the look of shock on Anthony’s face that mirrored her own, he hadn’t known about this either. They didn’t say one word to each other. They just stared at the pictures in front of them.

Kate quickly noticed the pictures were in chronological order. The first picture in the top corner of the canvas was when Ben visited Anthony during the second month of university. The two of them were lying on the grass in one of the college’s gardens, a bottle of champagne between them.

It was almost like Ben was trying to tell a story.

Their story.

The story of us.

There were so many pictures. There was another picture of Kate posing with Anthony’s lucky black mallet, after the annual Bridgerton pall mall game, with a sulking Anthony beside her during her first trip to Aubrey Hall. There was another picture of them, with her on his back. It was when they had finished their final exams for the last time, covered in confetti and champagne that their friends had sprayed all over them.

There was a picture of them laughing at each other in their graduation robes. There was another one of them and Newton at a park. There was another of them swinging Hyacinth between them at her birthday party. There was another of them dancing at Simon and Daphne’s engagement party.

“If it isn’t the stars of the hour,” A man said loudly, appearing beside Kate and Anthony and extending his hand. “I would recognize you two anywhere. I’m Henry Granville. It’s a pleasure to meet you. You have a very talented brother, Mr. Bridgerton.”

Kate and Anthony shook his hand warily, both still staring at the picture as they introduced themselves. Benedict and Sophie appeared at his side and the anxious look on Benedict’s face told it all. He glanced warily at Anthony, who hadn’t taken his eyes off the canvas.

“It’s an excellent piece,” Henry said, cheerfully grinning at Kate, Anthony, Benedict and Sophie. “It’s the most popular piece so far. I had to insist Benedict include it in the exhibit.”

“What did you say again was your inspiration behind it?” Henry asked, completely oblivious to the tense atmosphere in their current conversation.

Benedict took a moment before he replied. “The truth.”

Kate didn’t know what was going on. She wasn’t sure what Benedict meant and she really didn’t want to let herself fall into a trap that would end with her feelings hurt. Dreams were dreams and they couldn’t always be indulged. What did he mean by the truth?

“Excuse me.” Anthony said sharply, turning around and practically running away from the conversation.

“It was so nice to meet you.” Kate said, smiling apologetically as she made her way through the crowd, following Anthony’s brown head out towards the emergency exit that led to an ally.

“What was that about?” Kate asked, catching her breath as the cool night air hit her. She wrapped her arms around herself, her coat was in the cloak room inside. “That was really rude, Anthony.”

Anthony stared at her in disbelief, the fine lines on his forehead showing how stressed and tense he was. He looked absolutely furious.

“Did I miss something? Why are you so angry?” Kate didn’t know why she was playing dumb. She knew what the canvas looked like. It didn’t look like they were just friends. It was incredibly intimate and she didn’t think it was okay for Benedict to display them like that. She didn’t care about that at that moment. She didn’t understand why the thought of people perceiving them to be together was so upsetting to Anthony and she wanted to know why. She had to know.

It was finally time to confess.

“He should have asked.”

“Ben?” Yeah, sure. It was an intimate photograph. Kate didn’t really warm to the idea of her pictures being up for so many people to see but she didn’t mind it if it was Benedict’s way of expressing his art. “It’s only a few photos. The one of you, Hyacinth and Gregory is lovely.”

“I’m not talking about the others,” He said harshly, leaning against the brick wall of the gallery building. “That’s the one I have the problem with.”

What was so offensive about it? Kate felt herself getting defensive, not of the bloody pictures but of herself. “It’s just a few pictures, Anthony.”

“Do you not see what was on that canvas?” Anthony asked her, waving his arms in the air. “He’s made it look like we’re together.”

“No he hasn’t,” Kate spluttered, starting to feel incredibly warm despite the freezing January air. “It’s just a canvas of...friendship.”

“Come off it,” Anthony said bitterly, shaking his head in disbelief. “He’s made it out to be one big fucking love story.”

There it was.

He sounded disgusted, as if the thought of them being together was so unfathomable it was sickening. Kate stared at him, feeling an overwhelming sinking feeling in her stomach.

Anthony was pacing back and forth in the ally, the horns and ruckus of London fading into the background. He had pulled his tie off, the blue satin material was hanging loosely around his neck.

“Why are you so upset?” Kate asked, not entirely sure if she was ready for his answer. She was confused and upset about his outburst inside and about how stressed he looked. She knew Anthony more than she knew herself and a pacing, disheveled Anthony meant something was very wrong.

It was the calm before the storm.

”Why aren’t you?” His head snapped to the side to look at her as he finally came to a stop.

“Are we finally doing this then?” Kate’s question hung in the air, the weight of its implications making Kate’s chest tighten painfully.

He let out a deep sigh, their eyes never breaking contact as the meaning of her words sunk into them. He knew what she was asking but he chose to pretend he didn’t. “Doing what, Kate?”

“Being honest.”

“I’m not getting into this with you.” He said, shaking his head as he started to walk away from her. Kate was not letting that happen. He didn’t get to run away. She grabbed his arm, not roughly but firmly enough so he would stop.

The confusion and emotions of the last few weeks was rising to the surface. She didn’t want to stop it. Anthony had been so distant for weeks and then he spent a week back to normal. Now he’s angry with her over a photo? It wasn’t fair.

“I want to know what the hell has been going on with you. I don’t deserve this. You’re meant to be my best friend and up until last week, you were barely speaking to me. We lived together and I never saw you. You were avoiding me. Why?”

Anthony gulped, breaking eye contact as he processed her words. “I wasn’t avoiding you.” That was a pathetic attempt at a lie, especially for Anthony.

“It’s been eight years, Anthony,” Kate said bluntly. “I know by now when you’re lying.”

“Maybe I’ve had things going on, Kate. Things that have nothing to do with you.”

“I’m meant to be your best friend. Why can’t you talk to me about what’s been going on with you? We’ve never done that before. We’ve always told each other everything-”

“That’s bullshit and you know it,” Anthony swiftly interrupted her, shaking his head in disbelief. “You want to be honest? Let’s be honest. There’s always been something I can’t talk to you about Kate!” He snapped, finally losing his composure. “There’s always been things we can’t talk to each other about.”

“Like what?”

“You know exactly what I mean. Don’t play dumb.”

“I’m smarter than you, Anthony.” They were glaring furiously at each other, this was an argument like no other they had ever had before. “I just didn’t think you were brave enough to say it. Clearly, I was right.”

It was a challenge and he took the bait.

“Fine then,” He said, his lips in a flat line. “Why didn’t you like Siena?”

Kate hadn’t expected that. “What?”

“You heard me.”

“Why didn’t you like David?” She retorted, raising an eyebrow.

“And I’m not the brave one? Well, let’s see. How long do we have?” Anthony waved his watch in the air. “Should I start with the cheating or him being a complete knob?”

Kate shook her head in disbelief. “I knew you would never take this conversation seriously. Go ahead. We both know you didn’t like him because he was with me. But go ahead. Just avoid talking about your feelings with excuses, sarcasm and insults. How’s that been working out for you?”

“Fine!” She shrieked, waving her hands in the air. “I didn’t like Siena because I liked you, Anthony. I didn’t just like you. I loved you. I was completely and utterly in love with you. No, actually, I am completely and utterly in love with you. I’ve tried everything. I can’t shake it. I can’t shake you. I just can’t do it anymore. I can’t keep doing this. I can’t keep dancing around my feelings for you. I’ve doubted myself for so long, that it wasn’t possible for you to feel the same way. But you haven’t been fair. There’s been so many moments where it wasn’t just me. Friends don’t behave like we do.”

Her confession left them both stunned, the weight of its implications hanging in the air. Anthony stared at her in complete disbelief. He didn’t say anything. The silence turned into a minute as they stood there in that alley, neither of them saying a word.

He wasn’t saying anything. He wasn’t saying it back. He just stared at her with a blank expression.

Kate had to protect herself now.

“I’m sorry the thought of being with me is so hard to stomach, Anthony, but get the fuck over yourself. You’re being incredibly selfish, this is Benedict’s day. I know it’s difficult, but not everything is about you. It’s just a bloody picture.”

“That’s not what I meant,” He started, but scowled. “What the hell is that supposed to mean? That picture is going to make people think we’re together Kate.”

That was it. That was the reason he was so upset. He didn’t love her back. He barely acknowledged that she had just told him she had been in love with him for eight years. He didn’t want people to think they were together. That’s why he was so upset.

Her worst fear had been true all along.

He didn’t love her.

Kate would always hate herself for what she did next but in that moment, she wanted to hurt him as much as he had hurt her.

“Don’t worry Anthony,” She said dryly. “A few pictures with me hanging in a gallery won’t damage your chances of taking home some random girl so you can pretend for a while that you’re not completely fucking miserable.”

“Is that what you really think?” He asked, staring at her in disbelief. “I’m so sorry I’m not perfect, Kate. No one can ever live up to little Miss Perfect Kate Sheffield’s standards. Maybe if you got off your high and mighty pedestal and stopped judging me for a few seconds, you’d realize that at the end of the day, you’re just as fucking alone as I am. I just do something about it.”

“I would hardly call shagging random strangers doing something about it,” Kate snapped back, his words stinging her more than she would let him see. “At least my first instinct isn’t to sleep with anyone in sight because of how empty I am inside.”

“It’s better than staying with a prick for two years who made me fucking miserable. How did that work out for you?”

Kate gasped, as if he had knocked the wind out of her. “Fuck you.”

“I didn’t mean that, I’m sorry,” Anthony said, running his hands through his hair and pulling at it. “Kate. There’s a reason we have never happened. It wasn’t just you who flirted and felt..feel things. We wouldn’t work. We’re too good friends for something to ever happen. I’m not good at relationships. I’d find a way to fuck this up and lose you forever. Look at us now. We’d kill each other. It’s why it was best to forget what happened at my birthday-”

Kate completely froze. “What did you just say?”

Anthony's eyes widened as he stared at her, it dawned on him what he had just admitted.

“That morning,” Kate said slowly, shaking her head in disbelief. “You...you acted like you didn’t remember the kiss. You told me you didn’t remember anything that happened that night.”

Anthony actually looked ashamed. He looked down at the concrete and back up at her, biting his bottom lip. “I thought it was best to forget.”

“That’s so much worse. I...I’ve thought for the past year that you didn’t remember.” Kate looked up at him with horror. “Do I mean that little to you?”

Anthony rapidly shook his head. “Kate, I was protecting our friendship-”

She felt like she was going to get sick. “You’re a coward. How could you just-just pretend nothing happened? What is wrong with you?”

“I didn’t want to risk losing our friendship. What if we didn’t work out? How could we get past that? I’m sorry. I never meant to hurt you. Please, just listen-”

“Fuck your friendship. Do you know how terrible I’ve felt? How stupid I felt? That night meant everything to me, Anthony. I woke up that morning thinking everything that I had wanted was finally going to happen. I...I.” She stopped speaking, the lump in her throat taking over her ability to speak. “I’ve been in love with you since I was eighteen years old.”

He reached his hand out towards her, which she slapped away. “Kate, please-”

“No, you know what,” She said, shaking her head erratically. “You were right the first time. Let’s forget. Actually, let’s just forget this. Let’s forget we were ever friends.”

For the second time in her life, she saw Anthony Bridgerton cry. “You don’t mean that,” He said with a shaky voice, quickly wiping his eyes with the back of his hand. “Please, let me explain-”

“I can’t do this anymore. I don’t want to do this anymore.” Kate began to stumble back towards the door, wrenching it open. “Forget me. I don’t want to speak to you ever again.”

He didn’t call. Or text.

She nearly did a million times.

It had been exactly nine hours since the gallery and their argument, and it had been the longest nine hours of her life. Newton was with Mary for the week while Kate settled into her flat, so she was all alone. She didn’t want to think about him. She wouldn’t keep replaying their fight in her mind.

Kate had barely gone two days without speaking to Anthony since they’d become friends. Now, it would be forever.

She felt like she was dying, like she had lost this part of herself-and honestly, she had. She had never wanted that kind of love, that kind of need, where a person becomes a part of you. Losing her father had made her never want to feel that pain again.

Her father was gone. Now, so was Anthony.

She still got up and showered the next morning. On Saturdays, she always went roller skating with Edwina. Ed had been at the gallery last night and had tried to speak to Kate as she rushed through to grab her coat and go home. Kate told her she didn’t want to speak about it.

If she did, she would break.

Kate arrived half an hour early at Hyde Park. She had barely slept last night and she needed to get out of her flat before she screamed.

“You are fine. You’re going to skate in the park and forget about him. You’re fine.” She was now talking to herself. Her skating had improved over the past few months, she had even ditched the ugly knee pads Mary had bought her for Christmas. She pulled on her skates and began to skate through Hyde Park, music in her ears, and she only managed to think about Anthony only ever thirty seconds.

“Oh! I’m sorry buddy, I didn’t see you.” Kate said, quickly moving around a Labrador that had run in front of her in the pedestrian lane and stepping into the bike lane.

Kate didn’t see the bike that hit her a few seconds later either.

[moonbeambucky]

Hey Neighbor (Part 16)

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader Word Count: 2694 Warnings: fluff

Summary: You had a plan and then life came along with one of its own. With your future almost derailed you worked hard to get yourself back on track and finally everything seemed to be going right… that is, until your new neighbor moved in.

A/N: Feedback is always appreciated!

PART 15 | HEY NEIGHBOR MASTERLIST

Six weeks. That’s how much notice Bucky gave you until the wedding. You said yes to being his date before you had actually confirmed anything with work. The wedding was on the first Saturday in June but you would need to take off of work that Friday as well.

Technically one day off from Stark Industries wouldn’t be so bad and as predicted you were given the day easily. Unfortunately, you would have to take two days off at Metro-General and you really hoped that would be alright.

You hadn’t taken many days off since you began; a day for when you had food poisoning, another on the day of Wanda’s museum exhibit, but the hospital was a busy place and Elena was notoriously strict. Plus the more days you took off meant the more hours you would have to make up, which meant the longer it would take to fulfill your final requirement before graduating.

Once again, Marya’s words come to mind. Life will not wait for you so you needed to live it in the moment. It’s only two days.

With renewed confidence you knocked on Elena’s door and asked for the days off.

“Vacation?” she wondered.

“It’s for a wedding actually.”

Her dark eyes lit up at your answer. “Oh very nice. Where is it?”

“I’m not sure exactly. Somewhere in Long Island,” you chuckled, explaining that you were asked by a close friend to be his date.

After all these months of working together you realized this was the most personal conversation you’ve ever had with Elena. You had always tried to respect the boundaries of her as your boss but it was surprising as she seemed to open up first, letting down the guard she had carefully built up to protect herself while working in this field. Her approach carried over with her co-workers up until now.

“Mack was a close friend of mine once...” she said, turning the picture frame on her desk around towards you.

The photo showed her in the arms of a medium-brown skinned man with a dark beard and shaved head. Her whole face was smiling as she stared into his eyes and he was looking back at her like she was the only thing that gave meaning to life. Judging by their clothes you realized this was a wedding photo.

“You’re married? Since when?” You may have blurted that out a little bit louder than you expected but it was a bit of a shock considering she doesn’t wear a ring.

“Since I asked him,” she laughed. “Two years now, but we’ve been together for six and friends for a lot longer than that.”

Ahh now you understand what she was implying. “It’s not like that with me and Bucky. Well…” You bit your lip with uncertainty. “I don’t know. We’re friends and we kissed once but he’s dating other people and–”

“Yet he asked you to be his date.” She smirked, giving you a knowing stare.

Elena had given you the days off but part of you wished she didn’t. On the surface, Bucky was just a friend asking another friend for a favor but the more you thought about your history the more conflicted you felt.

From the moment he’s come into your life you’ve felt something towards Bucky. Sure his looks were undeniable but there was so much more about him. The passion he had for music matched what you felt for social work, and you connected, both of you realizing that each field plays an important role in helping people.

The more your friendship grew it felt like you were always meant to be in each other’s lives and you couldn’t imagine life without Bucky since he had become such a huge part of it. But you weren’t anything more than friends. That’s all.

The warm sun shines directly into your eyes as you exit the subway, trying your best to hear Peggy over the increased amount of people on the street. New York was always crowded but warm weather was a magnet that seemed to pull everyone out of their homes, drawing them outdoors to enjoy the beautiful day.

With Wanda on your left the three of you talk plans for Memorial Day weekend; it’s two weeks away and you’re trying to organize something for everyone to do together.

“I’m not sure if Sam has off or not yet but I do have some news,” Wanda said enticingly, biting her lip to contain her excitement. So many thoughts ran through your head as you waited for her to drop the details. “Sam and I are gonna move in together!”

“Oh Wanda, that’s brilliant!” Peggy said, her red painted lips stretching across her face in a beaming smile.

“I’m so happy for you two! When are you moving? And where?” you asked.

“His apartment is bigger so I’m moving there, hopefully by the end of the month but we’ll see. It’s hard with his schedule sometimes but I definitely want to be out as soon as possible.”

You offered assistance to help her pack and Peggy suggested making it a night with girls, with wine as a little motivation. “Yes, perfect!” Wanda agreed.

If only finding a dress for the wedding was as easy as helping Wanda move. You had already made a few trips to the department stores, trying on the perfect dress that fit like a dream and made you look incredible. Unfortunately, it cost more than your rent so it went back on the rack.

Your disappointing trip was made a little better by the promise of your friends to help you which is what you were doing now. One more block to go and you would be at the boutique you’ve never heard of before where Natasha was meeting you.

Opening the doors made you a little concerned. The place looked like it was from another planet. The glossy black ceiling stood in contrast to the bright white walls that were made up of three dimensional geometric tiles.

Silver accented the space from the large framed mirrors that leaned against the walls to the velvet pewter asymmetrically curved couch outside the dressing room. The clothes themselves looked normal at least, dresses of all kinds displayed on racks within silver frames, making them look like they were encased in glass.

Peggy and Wanda spread out to look for dresses, trying to find ones that resembled the overpriced gown you had only taken a selfie of to remember it by. Immediately you were drawn to a rack of flowy pastel colored ones, draping a few different styles over your arm.

In the middle of your search you heard Natasha call your name, and turning around to greet her you didn’t expect to see an unfamiliar face. She stood next to a man that towered over her small frame. A shock of ice blonde hair and matching bleached eyebrows caught your attention first before you moved on to his outfit, a red vest, leather pants and fur coat that seemed to only have one sleeve.

“Y/N, this is Taneleer Tivan, owner of The Tivan Collection,” she whispered the last line in a way as if you were meant to know who he was.

“Oh, it’s nice to meet you,” you said, though his facial expression didn’t change.

Though his eyes were surrounded by a smudge of dark liner you were able to see clearly the way he looked down in disgust at the dresses you held.

“Carina!” he shouted, and a moment later a girl came running forward. She wore a white vinyl dress that looked more like something you expected the store to sell, although her outfit is much more subdued than her boss’s.

She waited in silence with her hands clasped in front of her, in what seemed like a routine she was quite familiar with. “These are all wrong,” Taneleer said to you and suddenly the dresses were being taken out of your hands by his assistant. “I have much better in my collection.”

To your shock Carina was beside you again, ushering you towards a different section of racks that had more appropriate gowns despite neither her or her boss knowing what event you were shopping for. Thinking back, the pastels might have been a bit too casual anyway.

As you perused the new section you found an assortment of beautiful dresses, some absolutely stunning ones that had you worrying about the price. Natasha can certainly afford a lot more than you but glancing down at the tag you were surprised to see how reasonable things were. You took out a few jewel toned ones to try on that caught your eye.

“Y/N, what do you think of these?”

Peggy’s soft voice made you turn around. The first dress she held up was a satin one shoulder gown in black.

“Oh I like the design,” you said, pointing to the ruffles falling from the shoulder.

The next one she held up was a shimmering emerald dress whose classic mermaid style made you feel like you should be going to the Oscars instead of a wedding.

“Peggy, that’s too formal!” Wanda chimed in, huffing as she came over with more than a half dozen sparkly dresses.

She made room on the nearest rack to hang them, excitedly showing each one off to you. The first was a gorgeous sequined dress, rose gold sparkling in the light. It was undeniably beautiful but you had reservations. You were a guest at someone’s wedding and didn’t want to draw too much attention.

“This one is similar but you’ll see the difference,” she added, holding up another rose gold sequined dress, this one with a plunging V-neckline and a low open back.

“Wanda, that’s…” You stopped yourself from saying anything, grimacing uncomfortably at the dress that was so wrong.

“That looks like a slutty prom dress,” Natasha laughed, saying the thoughts you didn’t say aloud.

Wanda scrunched her face at Natasha before continuing with the next set of dresses. They were less eye catching as the others but still in the sparkly realm. You set aside a shimmering off the shoulder dress in turquoise that looked more like the ocean glittering in sunshine. The neckline was still a bit low but the back was more appropriately cut.

Natasha handed you one dress, a stunning red gown of flowing chiffon with a beautifully embellished bodice of lace and beading. The high neck of the dress complimented the tasteful open back design.

“Okay I’m getting overwhelmed. I have to start trying things on.”

With dresses in tow you made your way inside the fitting room and closed the curtain. Natasha sat across from Peggy and Wanda, checking work emails from her phone despite it being Sunday.

“Nat, did you get your wedding dress from here?” Wanda curiously wondered as her eyes roamed the store.

Her lips pursed as she took a deep breath. “I haven’t found a dress yet. I think we might have to push off the wedding again.”

“What was that?” you said, pushing open the curtains.

Peggy’s face lit up with a smile as you stepped out in a purple dress with lace detailing on the bodice. “You look beautiful!”

Your head turned towards the larger mirrors for a second to admire how you looked in the dress before you remembered the muffled conversation you heard through the curtain.

“Wait, Tash, did you say you’re pushing off the wedding again?”

She huffed loudly, leaning over and covering the frustration on her face with her hands. When she finally lifted her head you saw the desperation in her eyes. “I’m ready to say ‘fuck it’ and go to the courthouse.”

With Natasha’s ever increasing workload you’re quite surprised she hasn’t done this already. It doesn’t seem like she and Clint have made any progress since you’ve known them.

“Forget me,” she said, waving her hand as if to push the burdensome thoughts away. “That dress is pretty but there’s no wow factor.”

You looked in the mirror, realizing she was right. The next dress you put on was the red one Natasha picked out and that one definitely wowed but not in a good way. The bodice of the dress had an uneven cut that exposed part of your sides making you feel uncomfortable.

The one shoulder dress Peggy picked out was too tight but even if there was another size you didn’t like the satin. Wanda’s sparkly dress was a maybe but you weren’t completely sold on it yet. After changing in and out of a few more dresses you started to sweat and all you wanted to do was leave.

While hanging the dress you just stepped out of back up you saw there was one more left and your eyes lit up. You don’t remember grabbing this dress but it was meant to be from the moment you slipped it on.

It was a beautiful navy blue gown, with fluttering ruffles down the modest V-neck that also mirrored the back. Compared to some of the others this was a much simpler dress but there was something about it that felt right. It fit like a dream, flattering every part of you while still allowing for movement. Weddings mean dancing and the thought of dancing with Bucky made goosebumps prickle all over your skin.

As you opened the curtain you saw everyone’s jaws drop, their eyes lighting up as you stood in front of them.

“This! This is it!”

“You really think?” you asked, looking over your shoulder to see how it looks from behind.

Peggy nodded her head, “Definitely. It’s perfect.”

“Bucky’s going to love it,” Natasha added.

You rolled your eyes, missing the knowing look the three of them shared. “Guys, this isn’t for Bucky. I want to look good for myself.”

“And you do,” Wanda said, “But he’ll also appreciate how good your ass looks in that, damn!”

Rolling your eyes as they burst out laughing, you admired yourself in the dress a little longer knowing this is the one. You went back into the dressing room with Bucky on your mind. Sure, he might stare at you all night in this dress but the truth is it doesn’t mean much more than that.

Bucky was actively dating and the only reason you’re going with him to the wedding is so he doesn’t spend a weekend with someone he really doesn’t know. Panic washes over you as you worry about the near future. What if he meets someone he really gets along with before the wedding and he resents the fact that he asked you to go. What if he uninvites you? What if–

“Hey I found a really cute clutch to go with the dress,” Wanda said through the curtain.

You finished getting dressed, grabbing the dresses you didn’t want first. Opening the curtain you found Carina waiting beside Wanda, ready to take the dresses from you. You thanked her and took the dress you were buying, holding it up next to the clutch Wanda found. It was glittering gold with a metal trim on the opening.

“Oooh I love it.”

Carina was waiting silently at the register in anticipation of you bringing everything up to pay. As you took care of that Natasha said goodbye to Taneleer, kissing him on both cheeks. You thanked him as well before leaving and his mouth curved into the slightest smile.

Late lunch with the girls went by faster than you expected and you were happy to finally be home, hanging up the dress in your closet. You knew you had shoes that would pair well with it somewhere in your closet, a search meant for another day.

Before bed you decided to text Bucky, even though part of you was hesitant about it. You typed away quickly, sending the text and turning off your phone before he could respond. From the other side of the wall Bucky smiled when he saw a notification with your name.

You: Hope your suit game is good because I just bought my dress and it’s 🔥🔥

He couldn’t wait.

PART 17

[shewillreadyou]

Haven’t met you yet

As always. I hope that you enjoy reading as much as I enjoyed writing.

A/N: This is a TRR AU. Liam is already married, but see’s Riley and wants his cake. If the readers are receptive this might turn into more than a mini series.

Disclaimers: Most characters are property of Pixelberry

Warnings: NS*FW (+18) don’t read this fic if you’re a minor; period.

Word Count: 1887

Prompts: @wackydrabbles prompt #88 “I meant every word.” will appear in BOLD

Pairings: Drake & Riley

Song inspiration: Haven’t met you yet -Michael Buble

Be Kind: Hit the heart button, leave a comment or reblog. It makes a writer so so happy. 

A replay of the Royal wedding of King Liam and Queen Carsyn of Cordonia was playing in the background as she packed her clothes in the small carryon. She giggled when they kissed. Although it was rumored that the king was into black women, something seemed off when he kissed his bride. She had watched this wedding a half dozen times and still couldn’t really put her finger on it. She was headed to New York to stand up in the wedding of one of her sorority sisters. After landing her dream job in Dallas, Riley couldn’t wait to meet her sorors in New York to celebrate. After all, Norah was about to marry the man of her dreams and Riley was truly happy for them. 

There was currently no man in Riley’s life and no prospects. Maybe she’d meet someone in Dallas or maybe she was destined for the life of a career woman. Maybe there would be no happily ever after for her. She turned out the lights in her new downtown Dallas apartment, and grabbed her carry on dragging it to the door as she headed to the airport. 

She opened the door to see her latest amazon purchase on the door mat. She took a moment to retreat inside to open the box. She was hoping it was delivered before she had to head out. Her pink Bedroom Kandi toy was still packed away lost in the sea of boxes crammed into her guestroom. She knew that she would not survive this long weekend in NYC without some form of sexual entertainment. She was disappointed when she opened the box to find her new toy was smaller than the picture made it look. Her flight left in 2 hours and her uber was downstairs so she shoved the disappointing toy in the side of her bag and headed down.  

After the uneventful three hour flight, she finally landed at JFK. Mack was supposed to pick her up from the airport. She stood to the side as people herded to baggage claim to send a quick text. A group of men came from the opposite direction. One was this tall, very attractive Asian guy who looked alot like King Liam. He was with a few other men but there was one in particular who caught her eye. He was beautiful, he had dark hair and the most beautiful blue-grey eyes. The guy who bore resemblance to King Liam smiled and winked at her, while his brooding friend who definitely glanced at her, kept moving. She was snatched from her day dream when Mack texted to say she was outside. 

They checked into the Crown Plaza in Manhattan, freshened up and changed into their little black dresses before meeting the girls at a local rooftop lounge for appetizers and drinks before the bachelorette party. 

The sounds of Dua Lipa’s “Don’t start now” played in the background and encouraged a slightly inebriated Lauren to shake her body on the empty dance floor. Still licking the wounds behind a very fresh break up she intended to use this weekend to drink her troubles away and vowed to nail a stranger. 

The hostess seated a group of gentlemen at the table directly behind the ladies giving Riley, who never sat with her back to the door the best look at the group. It was them. The men from the airport. When they were settled, Riley’s eyes met with the Asian guy’s who was smiling and licking his lips. She rolled her eyes and turned to Kourtney. 

“So, how is Gabrielle, is she two now?” 

“Yes, she’s great. Busy, but great. That was real smooth. You have an admirer.”

“Ugh, I saw those guys in the airport when I landed. He smiled at me then too.”

“But now there are two of them looking at you like you’re a steak.”

Riley coyly glanced at the group again, this time noticing the dark haired man looking. She blushed and turned back to Kourtney right as the server approached with a whiskey sour, complete with a phone number written on the cocktail napkin. 

“How did he know what you drink?”

“Girl, I have no idea. Should I drink this?”

“Sure, they wouldn’t have served it if it had been tampered with. But the real question is are you going to call him?” 

“Me? Noooo. What would I say?” 

“What do you have to lose?”

“Wait, you have never dated a white guy before have you?” 

“Well, no. Not that they aren’t attractive. I just never had one interested. Not all of us find our Prince Harry.” 

“You do now. Besides, Chris is no Prince Harry, but he does treat me like a queen. I have always wondered if there are people who would rather be alone than to date outside of their race. Chris is the best thing that ever happened to me.”

“I definitely would date outside of my race if it were the right person. He is gorgeous, I’m still not calling this guy. He’s going to think i’m desperate.”

“You are!”

“I am not!”

“When was the last time you got laid? Mack told me about your toy.”

“Remind me to kill her later. It’s been 8 months, 3 weeks and 5 days. But who’s counting?”

“Exactly,” Kourtney cackled, drawing the attention of the men at the next table. 

Maroon 5’s, “Moves like Jagger” started to play as they continued to chat.

“May I have this dance?”

Riley was disappointed to find the King Liam look alike.

“Thanks, but my feet are killing me.”

“That’s too bad,” he said as he flashed her a sexy smile.

Just then she glanced across the rooftop to see him whisper something to his brooding friend. In an instant the guy with the beautiful eyes headed over and slipped the DJ a tip and whispered something in his ear before heading Riley’s way. 

“Kourt, shit! He’s coming over here what do I say?”

“Don’t. Let him do the talking.”

 He held out his hand and smiled at her and she was sure her panties were ruined.

“Hey, did I get your drink right?” he asked placing her hand in his.

“Actually, yeah you did. Impressive.”

Just then the DJ changed the song to Silk Sonic’s, “Leave the door open.”

The stranger pulled her to her feet.

“Let’s dance.”

His scent was intoxicating, his arms where strong and she could get lost in his eyes. He held her with a familiarity that made her feel at home in his arms.

“So are you going to tell me your name?”

“Drake. And you are?”

“Riley.” 

“We don’t have to talk right now. Let’s just dance. Just use my number when you’re ready.”  

“Their bodies swayed slowly to the song before her friends pulled her away to the next leg of their night.”

Two weeks later

After a very long weekend in New York, Riley was back in Dallas. She had been there for almost a month and hadn’t met anyone at all. Well, there was Will from work. But she doesn’t date co-workers and she is pretty sure he is gay. In her freetime she goes to the gym, and eats at new restaurants  a few times a week, which leads her back to the gym. After a particularly long work day, circuit training and an hour on the treadmill Riley came home and poured herself a very large glass of wine. She filled the tub, lit some jar candles and grabbed her toy and the romance novel that she was currently reading.

She was soaking in bubbles up to her neck when her phone rang, it was Kourtney. Out of all her friends she probably checked on Riley the most. She dried her hands and pressed the speakerphone button.

Hey Kourt,

Hey Ri, what’s new?

Not a thing, work, the gym, dinner, wine repeat.

That’s sad. No human interaction?

Not really. I’ve hung out with Mack and Ben twice but I always feel like a third wheel. 

Remember when I told you to call the guy from the rooftop?

Yeah. 

I meant every word.

I will think about it. I gotta go. Early morning. Love you.

Whatever, I know when I hit a nerve. I love you too.

Three days later

Riley was as lonely in Dallas as they come. She thought about online dating but wanted something more organic. Kourtney’s words lingered in the back of her mind. Maybe she was right. Riley had nothing to lose by reaching out to the handsome stranger who sent her the drink in NYC. She decided to take the plunge.

The next morning Riley sat on her balcony reading the paper and sipping amaretto flavored coffee when her phone rang.

Hey Mack! 

Hey, I am running into church and I know it’s short notice but Ben is out of town next weekend and my college roommate is getting married down in Waxahachie. Please tell me you don’t have plans and you’ll be my plus one.

I’ll have to check my planner. She laughed.

Who am I kidding? I don’t have plans. Free booze, food, and maybe a groomsmen to have a fling with. Count me in…

Yay! She squealed. I will pick you up Saturday morning and we can ride down to the ranch together.

Saturday

The doorbell rings and Riley grabs her clutch and the wedding card she got for the newlyweds before heading down to meet Mack. They catch up while they take the 30 minute drive out to the Walker Ranch where the ceremony is to be held. Mack talked about feeling like an after thought when it came to her boyfriend. Riley mentioned the need for human interaction, more specifically from a man and how the one man she met in New York lives in Europe. When they arrive Riley takes in the vast land and the beautiful event space. 

“Savannah’s family owns this ranch? Wow, it’s massive.”

“Yeah, I know at one time they were really struggling to keep things afloat. But it definitely looks like they are doing well for themselves now.”

“Right? I love when family businesses do well. It’s really a gorgeous day for an outside wedding. But we should probably take our seats. The ceremony will be starting soon.”

Mack led Riley to a couple seats on the bride's side. Before long a very serious looking groom and an officiant that Riley could only describe as a King Liam look-a-like stood under a wedding trellis decorated with blush colored blooms. The violinist started to play a beautiful arrangement as the attendants began to descend the aisle. 

“All rise and receive the bride.”

They guess all stood and turned to receive Savannah. She was a stunning bride. Then Riley laid eyes on those hypnotic blue-grey eyes. She instantly broke out into a sweat. She couldn’t ever mistake those eyes for someone else’s. He was as beautiful as the first tine she saw him. She swallowed hard and her mouth went dry. Her heart seemed to be pounding out of her chest, she was shaking when she gave Mack’s hand a firm squeeze. 

“What’s wrong Ri?”

Before she could answer, his eyes met hers, he bit his lip and her knees buckled. 

“Um Ri?”

“It’s Drake from the rooftop in New York..”

@txemrn​ @pixie88​ @secretaryunpaid​@khoicesbyk​ @blackkingliamstan​ @mom2000aggie​ @shannonwrote​ @hopelessromanticmonie​ @fanjessfic​ @rideordiechronicles​ @lucy-268​ @dcbbw​ @darley1101​ @maurine07​ @burnsoslow​ @sfb123​ @bbrandy2002​ @kingliam2019​ @schnitzelbutterfingers​ @lem-20​ @choicesficwriterscreations​​ @wackydrabbles​​

TRR: @twinkleallnight​  @bebepac​ @mainstreetreader​ @romereadingshop​ @romewritingshop​ @lem-20​ @texaskitten30​

[madsdefencesquad]

The semi-companion piece to Kevin's one and it's all about Mads, of course. Dedicated to Kevison Nation (every single fudging one of you) and to @flythesail and @penny259 (your comments have me weeping haha 😚). Also on ao3.

A little into Madison Pearson by x (with additions) Summer 2026

I first met Madison Pearson a year ago at George Clooney’s 65th birthday celebrations in Perthshire, Scotland in a fashion closer to that of long-travelled friends who haven’t seen each other in years than that of complete strangers who just so happened to enjoy the same foodie indulgence (bacon-wrapped dates, anyone?). Despite the grandeur of the guests present at the lavish affair – politicians, laureates, philanthropists and A-list celebrities (including her own husband actor Kevin Pearson) – Madison Pearson had the kind of invigorating energy that just drew absolutely anyone in.

Perhaps it was the enchanting mix of contained excitement and understated class she exuded that will warm you upon beholding up close, or perhaps it was the charm of a more loquacious woman of California mixed with the rare intelligence of a world-traveller. Either way, despite the taxing social waltz her husband took her throughout the night bumping elbows with the elites, Madison was one of those people who truly left a lasting impression.

Squeezed next to her in the back of a cab, Madison is head-to-toe in Temperley London x Axel Arigato (vintage-inspired nautical jumpsuit and platform suedes) en route to a baking class where her five-year-old twins Nick and Franny are waiting for her to join them along with their father.

“I was supposed to get changed,” she says, lamenting on her attire worn for a meeting with some West Chester development executives that’s perhaps too luxurious for an afternoon of mixing flour and butter and sugar. “But you have to make at least a bit of an impression, right?”

Madison has been the powerhouse head honcho of the Pearson family business, Big Three Homes, since its establishment three years prior. With a solid background in business management and a surefooted ability to navigate the mores of an ever-changing property development landscape, it was no question that Madison would rise up to the challenge of breaking into the market with a business model founded on family, philanthropy and sustainability.

Despite growing up largely independent without people close enough to call family, Madison has also found the means to speak about her experiences in an effort to encourage and give hope to the younger generation of girls and young women who may be going through an ongoing battle between themselves and their self-worth.

“I never felt enough,” she says of the origins of her battle with her eating disorder that began when she was still in middle school. “I look at Franny and she’s so small and carefree and I want to give her everything I never had, but I know that even that won’t be enough unless she herself realises how worthy she is of all the good and all the love that she deserves.”

We pull up outside the baking studio and she brightens at spotting her husband and twins’ silhouettes behind the frosted glass windows. Nick and Franny almost topple over their stools as they rush to overwhelm their mother while their father scrambles to keep his heart rate down—a close call with their foreheads hitting the edge of the marble benches as they got down will just about do it.

Even with her petite frame, Madison carries the twins like she’s just holding a bag of groceries. Unsurprisingly, both Nick and Franny are as enamoured of their mother as she is of them and are on the verge of complaining when put down just as Kevin, grinning ear to ear, envelops Madison in his huge arms—to be fair, he’s always been quite remarkably chiselled but the Tom Ford sweater and those tailored jeans (chosen by his wife “of course” as Kevin credits) is a different level altogether. He leans down to give her a kiss.

Back in Perthshire a year ago at the Clooney extravaganza, I caught up with the married couple the day after the festivities over a traditional Scottish breakfast as we overlooked the highlands of the Gleneagles.

Perhaps unlike the Clooneys, who were still entertaining their guests from all over world, the Pearsons were much more relaxed within their own family bubble. Having just celebrated Kevin’s twin sister’s wedding three days prior with close family and friends, the pair was grateful to spend some quality time with each other and their twins without the need to be anything but present.

From my perch, Kevin and Madison were the kind of couple that were very much “old souls”. They held an affection for each other that is rooted from sincere fondness and adoration for each other—they converse like deep friends and trade wits like secret lovers. And despite the media attention of the adorable moments shared online (often by the social-savvy actor), Madison is uncompromising when it comes to the privacy of their children.

While the twins dipped in and out of the table pilfering scones or taking over their mother’s green juice, neither one of their parents were the least bit bothered by the constant attention they need to provide such a rumbunctious pair.

“They’re so funny,” Kevin said, a careful eye on little Nick who was staring at the whipped cream on his tiny finger like he was contemplating on wiping it on his dad’s face.

I do recall having a good laugh when I accompanied the family on a tour of a nearby 17th century castle and little Franny, a copy-and-paste of her mother, pointed at a wood-cut table decoration of what looked to be intertwined lovers and confidently yelled, “That’s mommy and daddy!”

The fierce mama bear of the Pearson household of four (Madison sometimes calls her husband “kid number three, but don’t tell him that or he’ll get ideas of trying for another!”), remarks that forging her own path away from her husband’s spotlight had been remarkably easy, and she gives much of the credit to the rest of the Pearson clan who all treasure family more than anything.

Even with the notoriety of her brother-in-law, rising political star Randall Pearson, who currently serves in the Philadelphia municipality and is on track for a career in congress, Madison says that quality time to rest and recuperate is a must.

“[My sisters-in-law] and I have a girls weekend every other month when we can where we literally book ourselves a gorgeous Airbnb and just glamp down. I’m talking sleep-ins, endless mimosas, spa sessions… you name it! It’s the kind of getaway that [our husbands] get really jealous for.”

And upon being reminded, Kevin, now sporting Franny’s tiny chef’s hat, shakes his head at his wife conspicuously as if in reprimand that he most definitely should be included in the gals’ next glamping session despite him being, well, not a gal.

While Nick proudly counts five of about a thousand sprinkles that are scattered on his side of the bench, Madison congratulates him with a warmth and pride that is infectious enough to make you think that she’s proud of you too. And despite her husband’s very obvious possessiveness over her—you could count only one occasion where the actor is not at arm’s length from her—when Madison focuses her attention on you, it’s not difficult to believe that this powerhouse woman could truly do absolutely anything.

“She is that and more,” Kevin says about his wife. “Sometimes I can’t believe that this is my life. Our life! Like, she’s mywife, and these two are our kids. It’s just wild! I’m grateful, just grateful.”

Despite the doubts and fear that had been Madison’s constant companions for most of her life and especially going into adulthood, there is a fierce resilience in her that she could only credit her dear grandmother Frances—her own daughter having been named after her.

“She always believed in me,” she recalls, an eye on the twins squatting by the oven watching their creations rise. Despite the deep grief and loss that are quite intimately shared by the married couple, Madison says that it has only made them more resolute in loving their children and each other as best as they possible can every day.

“You just don’t know when it’s your time,” she says. “So, Kev and I make sure that there are no ‘next times’ when it comes to our family.”

When I had asked Madison about Big Three Homes back in Scotland, she squealed at the origin story of its founding, which started with Kevin’s late father Jack Pearson having asked his wife Rebecca to start the business together as partners.

Although Jack’s tragic and unexpected passing put an indefinite hold to this dream, its fulfilment through his son Kevin and through Madison is a testament to the kind of legacy that Jack Pearson had begun through his kids.

“I mean, it started off as more of a passion project for Kev,” Madison says. “But we knew it was always going to be something really special. Especially because his first project was the house that Jack had wanted to build for his mom. And when Kevin had this wonderful idea of bringing the family together to start the business and he asked me to be a part of it, how could I have said no!”

Kevin makes a point to say though that even if the idea of Big Three Homes originally came from his parents, its fulfilment is as much a part of his and Madison’s own story as it is his parents’. And choosing to have Madison work alongside him wasn’t just the best choice (given how much of a boss she is), but it was the only choice he ever wanted or considered.

“I know this is cliché, but I can’t stand not being with her,” Kevin says. “I made a point of this when our twins were born, and I meant it!”

Madison and the family split their time between California and Pennsylvania both for Kevin’s work and for the business, but nowadays, it’s more of an 80-20 split in favour of the east coast.

When asked about a career path carved away from her hometown in California, Madison says fondly, “It surprises a lot of people when I say this but I’m actually an east coast girl.”

This fun fact translates quite well in Madison’s day to day. She could turn any conversation into an erudite discussion, and she will utterly beguile you with her knowledge of books and literature—her constant companions when she can sneak away to her own personal Taj Mahal, a stunning Japanese garden in the backyard of their Pennsylvania home which Kevin built especially for her.

As the Pearsons continue to make a splash in the world of construction, politics, arts and entertainment—a rare mix indeed for a family in the spotlight—Madison is determined to continue writing a story with her husband and her children that she never had growing up.

With the twins happily destroying their creations by the mouthfuls, Madison promises that another visit is a must and perhaps this time, she can show us a collection of Kevin’s baby photos coupled with her own personal commentary to boot.

And who would say no to that.

[justasparkwritings]

Exile: My Town

Previous: Five Whole Minutes

Pairing: Timotheé Chalamet x Reader

Genre: Angst, Slice of Life

Rating: PG15 

Word Count: 1.9K

Warnings: Swearing

Summary: If he was honest with himself, Timothée expected her to cancel. But there she is, on his doorstep.

Exile Master List

     The phone had rung hundreds of times over the last six months. The first month, Timothée called her twice a day, every morning and every night. On weekends he called more frequently, drinking his days away, leaving embarrassingly long messages. He declared his love, shared his vision for their future, talked about what he wanted to name their kids and when he thought they’d get married. He described the property in France that he wanted to buy, did she know he had been looking? He detailed how he wanted to continue to go back to Crema for the summer, maybe buy a villa there too, and split summers between the two locations. He wanted their kids to learn French and Italian, he wanted her to learn too. He wanted to wear a paisley suit, or maybe velvet, for their wedding. Their wedding, he had already planned, and wouldn’t it be romantic if it was over three days in their new château?

    He became more desperate as the days turned into weeks, which turned into months. On one particular evening, his anger overcame him as he yelled into the receiver about her belongings and their house. What the fuck did she want to do? Did she fucking plan on ever coming back for her clothes? Did she expect him to fucking ship them from their house to wherever the hell she was? And, where was she? Where the fuck was she? Why was she doing this to him? To their life? Why the fuck couldn’t she get over it and come home? Didn’t she realize how much he needed her? Why wouldn’t she just talk to him?

    This had been the final straw. He had awoken to find a new folder had been shared with him. He opened it and was confronted with what he had become. She had saved his voicemails, his drunken assaults and languid descriptions of their life. She had kept his sobs, his deepest secrets, his desires. Here they were for him to relive. At the end was a memo he hadn’t recorded, a message from her, telling him the days she would be coming over to pack her belongings and detailing the furniture in the house that she wanted. She didn’t care where he went, but for those three days, he couldn’t be there. She told him to sell the house, she’d take her share of the profits, and if he decided he didn’t want to move, he needed to buy her out.

    The cracks deepened. The sorrow became overwhelming. The darkness was everywhere. Despite her best attempts, her jovial personality and excitement at preparing for the baby, Florence was at a loss. She didn’t know how to make him feel better. She didn’t know how to dissuade the guilt she felt at playing a part in their demise.

    After six months and one week, Florence had gone into labor. They decided to keep it low key, which is why on a Saturday a month after his daughter’s arrival, he had called her to ask if she would come by and meet his new daughter. He had left it open ended, a few friends stopping by to meet her, no big deal, and maybe could they talk? She had said she would stop by. After seven months, she still hadn’t spoken to him about why she left.

    Florence had brought the baby over to get acquainted with Timothée’s home, since she would be spending half her time with him. Tim was excited to have his daughter in his house, instead of staying at Florence’s a few nights a week to take care of her. He recognized that they would need to find a solution until she stopped nursing, and he was more than happy to spend the night, often taking all the night shifts so Florence could sleep. But he wanted his daughter in his house, and he wanted to share his daughter with his love, even if they hadn’t spoken in seven months. She was still his love, his future, wasn’t she?

    If he was honest with himself, Timothée expected her to cancel. But there she is, on his doorstep.

    “Hi,” She says, holding the gift box tightly in her hands.

    “Hi love,” He says, smiling at her. “You look, gorgeous.”

    “Don’t,” She says.

    She had tried to prepare for this, for being in her house when it was no longer hers. Timothée wasn’t making a move until they had spoken. Why would he sell their house, the house that they had built and let their love blossom in? She couldn’t tell if he loved it because it was theirs, and in his mind, he still thought there was a chance they would get back together, or because he really liked the modern home. The fact that he hadn’t bought her out or moved to sell it both infuriated her and reminded her why she would always love him: sentimentality.

    She stands at the threshold, peering in. The memory of picking out the tiles in the entry way and the stain of the hardwood floors cascaded over her. She had insisted on the herringbone pattern, which made the stairs look like a maze of wood grains. Timothée had just looked at her, smiling and saying, “as you wish”. She hadn’t imagined when they’d hung their Christmas photos leading towards the living room, that she’d been on the outside, wondering how long he’d keep them up and when he took them down, would he tell her? What would he do with the framed images when he realized they no longer had a future? Would he keep them up, despite it no longer being a home, but to show his daughter what once lived in this place? Or would he discard it to create something new for his life with his child?

    “We’re in the living room,” Timothée steps aside and lets her walk in. She kicks her shoes off and pads softly towards the voices and baby coos.

    “You came!” Florence calls, standing up to meet her. “I’m so happy to see you.”

    She meets Florence’ enthusiasm and hugs her. Florence had wanted to meet with her at various points in the pregnancy. She wanted to talk with her, try to get her to understand what her having Timothée’s baby meant, but she didn’t budge. She would only see Florence in group settings, and even then, she stayed away. Which is why Florence is so thrilled when she walks into the living room.

    “You look amazing! How are you feeling?” She sits on her couch, the one she spent weeks researching, picking patterns, comparing quality of fabrics, before insisting on this one. She hadn’t expected Timothée to change their home, but it was almost worse sitting in it, everything where she left it. He had bought similar items as placeholders for the ones she had taken, his unwillingness to admit that the items weren’t coming back evident in their lesser replacements.

    “I’m doing well, really well. Did you bring a gift? You didn’t have to!” Florence says, reaching for the present.

    “Oh, it’s nothing, really,” She hands the box to Florence, who proceeds to open it quickly.

    “Oh my god, this is so cute!” Florence calls, taking in the puzzle she’d picked out.

    “You know, for when she’s a little older and is playing. I remember my name puzzle from childhood, I always loved it,” She says smiling.

    Timothée can feel his heart aching. Of course, she picked a thoughtful, caring gift for his daughter. Of course, even in this challenging situation, she chose to take the high road.

    “Well, speaking of, this is Margot,” Florence says, picking up her daughter from the bassinet to the right of the couch. Placing her delicately in her friends’ arms, Florence sits.

    She smiles and cradles Margot in her arms. She can feel the tears as they begin to form and wills herself to not let them fall. She has Timothée’s eyes, and enough curly hair to match her father. Her olive skin and delicate features resemble her mother. She’s beautiful.

    Moments pass before she realizes she’s staring, unmoving, unspeaking.

    “She already loves you,” Timothée says, coming over and sitting next to her on the couch.

    “She’s really beautiful,” She says, handing her back to Florence. Silence falls as Margot coos. “Um, I can’t stay long, just wanted to stop by,” she says standing.

    “Nonsense, stay for a drink!” Florence says, positioning herself to nurse baby Margot.

    “No, I can’t, thank you though, for inviting me,” she quickly hugs Florence and says bye to Margot. She walks swiftly to the foyer and slips her shoes on before he’s grabbing her wrist.

    “Don’t go,” Timothée says, grip tightening on her skin.

    “I have other plans, can’t cancel,” She says, free hand moving to wipe a stray tear.

    “Talk to me, you haven’t spoken to me in seven months, please,” He says.

    “Well you’ve done enough for the both of us,” She opens the front door and starts walking down the driveway.

    “I’m sorry, I don’t know how else to say it, I’m sorry,” He grabs her wrist again in an attempt to turn her around.

    “Stop apologizing.” She says, tugging her arm out of his grasp. “Just, stop.”

    “Why can’t we talk about this? Why can’t we share in this? I need you; I love you. I know you’re mad at me, I know you’re upset but I’ve been racking my brain for seven months trying to figure out why you can’t handle this. You are my rock; you are my fucking harbor. We have a life together! I need you; I need you,” He says, the crack in his voice giving way to the tears spilling down his cheeks.

    “I can’t do this,” She says, voice wavering

    “Why the fuck not?” He calls.

    “Because! Because Timothée,” She yells, venom in her throat. “This is supposed to be me. This is supposed to be my life. This is the life you promised me.” She tries to inhale through her sob. “I know you need me. I know it’s been a difficult seven months. But this was supposed to be us, it was supposed to be our baby in our house. You and me.”

    “I’m sorry, I know, I know we had plans I know, but, she’s my daughter and I can’t change what’s happened with -”

    “You don’t fucking get it, Timothée,” She cuts him off.

    “What don’t I get? What don’t I understand? I have been trying to understand why you left for months! I keep coming up short. Why would you walk out on us? Why would you abandon me and our dreams? What possib-

    “She made you a father,” She gasps as the words tumble out. She pauses, trying to inhale and regain any sense of composure. “Florence gave you a child. She did! No matter what I do, I will always…”

    “I-I,” He stumbles, realization washing over him as his body gives way to another round of sobs.

    “I will never be able to… my entire life, my life with you … our life … is gone, Timothée. Sell the house, buy the villa in Crema, raise your daughter…” She throws her hands up and inhales abruptly, “This was supposed to be ours.”

    She darts into her car and quickly pulls out of the driveway. She doesn’t stop as he falls to his knees. She doesn’t stop as she drives away from the house and the life they shared. He doesn’t stop calling after her, even after his knees hit the concrete, the snot and tears mixing on his tongue as he tries to will her back.

Next: Insult to Injury 

[sweetestlamb]

Lighting Up Your World Part 3

Wedding Special

Just a little teaser for the wedding fic. Missed writing them and interacting with y'all. MoonMun wedding coming this weekend! 💍🎩🎊 I give you the proposal 😏

"We looked so happy." He says aloud, fondly looking at their smiling faces shining back at him, the light from his phone glowing in the dark of the room. He'd taken a selfie of Mun-yeong and himself after her first successful swim, it'd taken her five tries but she had succeeded, battled her demons and came out stronger. The pride that had covered her face had to be savored and disregarding any watery harm that could become his phone, he'd hastily snapped a candid picture of them. Her soaking wet from her splashes before something slippery had touched her foot and she'd left the water, declaring it had to be a shark. He'd snickered at her, eyes amusedly glancing around at the still lake water.

In the photo their faces were pressed together, her rosy cheeks mashed against his own. Her eyes had disappeared into half moons beaming with joy, his smile was free and unguarded. He almost didn't recognize himself. Happiness unnatural on his face.

A year ago, driving aimlessly with her had ironically led him to finding himself. It wasn't an epiphany per say, there was no definitive moment that unconcealed his inner being. Rather he'd seen the extent of himself, how happy he could be if he allowed happiness in. If he stopped slamming the door shut every time he felt glee running through his veins. She'd been the first bang at his door and hadn't stopped since they met. The trip was once in a lifetime. He'd fallen for her long ago but seeing her on that trip made him truly understand what love was. What it meant to love her. All-consuming.

They weren't perfect, they fought. Slamming doors and crashing into the van walls tangled as they ripped their clothes off and fell into angered fits of passion. They worked on apologizing with words too instead of actions, but at times actions spoke louder for both. They also smiled so much so his cheeks ached from it, holding her in his arms felt like a gift. It was the best time of his life, he embraced the good and the bad.

She shuffles in the bed, rolling into him and accidentally knocking the phone from his hands. Simultaneously knocking him back into reality. Even in the depths of slumber demanding his full attention. He can't control the loving way his eyes peruse her face, gorgeous under the soft moonlight trickling in through their sheer curtains.

After the trip the thought of sleeping without seemed unfathomable and surprising him once more Sang-tae had been the one to encourage him to move into her room. "I'm an adult, I can't share a room with my little brother. See if Mun-yeong wants you, I need space. I'm an adult Moon Gang-tae, you can't sleep in my room." His brother uttered those words as he'd pushed him out the door of said room, his meagre belongings stuffed haphazardly into a book bag. He feigned indignation before all but skipping to join Mun-yeong in her, no their new room. 

Her smile when she came in and saw him putting his clothes away in an empty drawer had been so beautiful, so soft and vulnerable. He didn't fight the urge to collect her into his arms, as they fell into bed. He was right where were was always meant to be.

A year later, he's still here. With his first love, his only love. His heart beat. His bulldozer. His tempest.

"Aishhh... Why are you awake? Do you want to have some fun? Again?" Her sleep raspy voice is filled with mischief and promise as she presses her naked body into his own.

Dropping his phone he turns to her, eyes bright as he leers down at her offering. After a lifetime spent refusing the things he wanted most, he's ready to be indulgent, greedy even. Slowly he crawls over her, warm bodies melting into each other, her legs parting under his weight as he slides into the space given. A soft gasp falls from her swollen lips as he caresses her hip, fingers trailing in exploration.

"I like playing with you." Her eyes crinkle at his words, half moons greeting him. Without hesitation he captures her mouth in a deep languid kiss, tongue parting her flesh and swallowing her subsequent moan. Capitalizing on her distracted state, he drags his hand down to her treasure, sighing as he feels her warm wetness. Arousal washes over him as her moistness coats his fingers as he penetrates with the tips of his fingers. Beneath him she writhes in pleasure, drawing him closer as she grinds on his hand.

Shifting he manuevers himself, hard erection at her opening, their eyes meet as he breaks their kiss.

"I love you Ko Mun-yeong."

He means it. Loves her with every fiber of his being, and spontaneity spurs him on, driving his words. With a deep thrust he fills her, his name a sermon on her lips as her hands wraps around his neck.

"Marry me?"

Her eyes are clouded with desire, so much so that at first his inquiry only elicits stillness as her brain processes his word. He watches mesmerized as her eyes fill with tears, love leaking down her cheeks. A quiet sob shatters his heart but her answer sews it back together.

"Only you would turn sex into a marriage proposal." Her breathing increases as he draws back longer to plunge deeper into her, eyes ravaging her face. When she discloses no more words, lost in their tangled limbs and the incessant motion of him driving into her, he draws out completely, tip teasing her folds.

He chuckles at her annoyed huff, catching her hands as she tries to drag him back into their dance.

"This is emotional manipulation." She glares at him, enticing breasts jiggling from her long suffering inhale.

He shrugs, "You've done worst. You almost ran me over one time." Cutting off her rebuttal, he presses a single digit to her mouth, grabbing her hand and removing the promise ring he placed one year ago.

She watches with rapt eyes as he meets her gaze once more, "Mun-yeong, will you marry me?"

Emotions swirl in her eyes, underneath the love he sees wonder and...doubt.

"I mean it. I really want to. I want you forever. I'm ready to turn that promise ring into your engagement ring. What do you think about forever?"

Her smile is bright enough to blind him, "Okay. Forever sounds like a good start." With gentle hands he places the ring back, perfectly fitting on the marked skin of her finger. The ring looks more beautiful than it did seconds ago, its purpose renewed.

After a not so gentle nudge, he laughs sliding back into her. They fall into a slow searching rhythm, her legs tightly wrapped around his waist as he thrusts into her.

"If you ever try to leave me I'll break your legs and drag you back." She promises.

He laughs louder, her declaration like a love letter. Their lovemaking somehow sweeter now and they find pleasure and solace in each other's warmth.

You're so warm.

[lonestarpost]

April 5, 2021~ Masterlist ~ Issue 9

Episode Spotlight

An video episode spotlight by @trkstrnd

The Edits Edit

Some of the best edits this week that deserve all the love.

This Grace edit by @beesgraphicsmess is so amazing and highlights Grace so well this one of Judd is also great.

jamie’s 1k follower celebration ~ favorite episodes ↳ #3 - 2x04 “Friends with Benefits” by @silvarafael is an excellent gif set (and all the ones in the 1k follower celebration series are wonderful).

9-1-1: LONE STAR - S1 E8 - “Monster Inside” (and all the Carlos Reyes edits) by @howtosingit is always a delight to see on my dashboard.

I’ll crawl home to him… | [insp.] by @marwankenzari is a breathtaking Tarlos gifset that I adore.

Prince Carlos as seen at his 25th Name Day Celebrations  by @reyeslonestar is an amazing piece of fanart!

I’m gonna love you for a long time by @shoenaerts is beautiful.

he found the colors to paint him where the world had left him grey. by @marwankenzari is a lovely Tarlos edit.

make me choose: (buddie or tarlos?)  by @maygrant is a marvelous Tarlos edit.

This Tarlos edit by @beesgraphicsmess is amazing!

This impressive edit by @djdangerlove is gorgeous

Fic Recs

Showing love to fantastic writing!

Sleep is never coming by @marjansmarwani (Brilliantbanshee)

Word Count:2881

Chapters: 1/1

Owen has been having the same dream for months now. Every few nights he falls asleep and is returned to one of the worst moments of his life in vivid technicolor. After one of these nights, he finds himself in the kitchen: seeking some tea in pursuit of sleep when he is suddenly not alone. But maybe the young officer who just stumbled into his kitchen from his son's bedroom is the best person he could talk to about this. Maybe it takes someone who loves his son as much as he does to truly understand the fear that is keeping him up at night.

we’ll be a fine line by @reyesstrand (stormss)

Word Count: 3220

Chapters: 1/1

He closes his eyes, and all he can picture is the kid's pinpoint pupils and cold, clammy skin. TK closes his eyes and all of a sudden he's back in his shoebox apartment in Brooklyn, and he can't get rid of the sourness pooling under his tongue, the trembling of his fingers, no matter how damn hard he tries.

Turn to the Left by @alilypea (alilypea)

Word Count: 2952

Chapters: 2/? (WIP)

TK Strand has been modelling since the age of 16,  but a rash of bad jobs and bad publicity, as well as a bad breakup, send him running to his Dad, Owen Strand, Captain of the 126 in Austin, Texas. There he learns that fame can't get you everything, and sometimes you have to win people over by being honest and being yourself...

When Snow Falls, We Listen by (destimushi)

Word Count: 15925

Chapters: 6/24 (WIP)

Hollywood heartthrob TK Strand seems to have everything figured out. He's got the career of his dreams, his pick of scripts, and a platform where he gets to touch the lives of hundreds of thousands of people. Sure, his personal life is just one sex scandal after another, but he's used to that. He loves his job and adores his fans and that's all that matters. After attending a wedding that drags up unpleasant memories from a past he'd rather forget, TK books himself a remote cabin in Canada where he can re-center himself before his next big shoot.

Carlos Reyes loves to cook, but he loves watching people enjoy his food more. Although his catering and meal planning business is booming, he's lost the spark of passion that drove him to culinary school in the first place. When his last catering job goes sideways and nasty rumours start to fly, Carlos retreats to his family's cabin up north in Canada for some much needed time to make some life-altering decisions.

Miscommunication brings them together, but a snow storm keeps them there, and it's up to TK and Carlos to figure out what it is they both need to weather the storm.

no right to love you by (ksmalltalk)

Word Count: 17690

Chapters: 2/2

In an attempt to figure out his place in the world, TK has spent the last two months traveling after the events of the solar storm. While out on the road, TK aimed to define what home meant to him, only to realize that he left it back in Austin. Upon the day of his return, TK finds that so much of life is just as he left. Every aspect but one. With a change in relationship status for Carlos, the homecoming TK pictured is turned on its head. As he and Carlos work through their strained, complicated history, TK hopes that the next road he travels will lead to Carlos' heart.

Adding New Players by @djdangerlove (DjDangerLove)

Word Count: 2384

Chapters: 1/1

Carlos and TK both want kids, but TK's fears go beyond those of just new parent jitters.

reassurance in kissing by @lire-casander (Lire_Cassander)

Word Count: 870

Chapters: 1/1

#2 ~ a small, fleeting kiss — which is immediately followed by a passionate, hungry kiss.

Fandom News

Hosting events? Have important announcements? You’re welcome to bring them here to keep people in the know.

April 5-11: 911 Lone Star Angst Week

It’s no secret that this fandom is full of talented creators who love the hurt that comes with the show. As a way to highlight the incredible creations, we would like to introduce angst week!

Writing Prompts

April 5 / Day 1: Emotional whump + “How do we fix this?”

April 6 / Day 2: Physical whump + “Does it hurt badly?”

April 7 / Day 3: Coda / fix-it fic

April 8 / Day 4: Sickfic + “You need to rest.”

April 9 / Day 5: Mental health + “I’m so tired of feeling like this.”

April 10 / Day 6: Off the job injury + “You’ve got to be more careful.”

April 11 / Day 7: Free choice!

April 16-18: 911 Lone Star Weekend

Writing Prompts

Day 1: Romance/ “You are the only one for me.”/Fluff

Day 2: Emergencies/“Please, stay awake.”/Angst

Day 3: Found Family/“We’ve got your back, no matter what.”/Hurt/Comfort

Non-Writing Prompts

Day 1: Romance – Favorite tender moments

Day 2: Emergencies – Favorite rescue scenes

Day 3: Found Family – Favorite group scenes

[lovingthereign25]

Never say Goodbye

Part 7

Baby, I got to go Jules  is here crying" I lie 

"Okay Mama I love you call you later" Derek says

" I love you too," I say hanging up.

"What're you doing here?' I say

"Y/n, it's Lyndsey, she in the hospital" Joe says

"What?, Why? " I panic

"I'll explain on the way, grab your things I'll grab Noah.

Joe explain the Lyndsey passed out at work and hit her head pretty bad

"When Josh called me you automatically came to my mind, you two are closer than anything" he says placing his hand on yours.

"Thank you, I appreciate you coming to get me and Noah" I say

When I  arrived at the hospital, I was greeted by Josh and my parents telling you Lyndsey was stable but couldn't remember much and was asking for me.

"Joe can you please sit with Noah" I ask 

"Of course" he smiles, taking Noah from me.

After I saw Lyndsey, I stepped out to call Derek noticing I had a missed call from him.

"Yea Y/n, how's Lyndsey?" He asks

"She's…..wait how'd you know? I ask confused

"When you didn't answer, I called Julianna and it turns out she was at the hospital already waiting to get in touch with you, so my question is where were you?" He asks

"I was at the hotel on the phone with my husband, they sent Joe to pick Noah and I up" I say

"Yea of course, Joe ...is this always gonna be a thing Y/n?" He asks

"What? I ask

"This you and Joe shit, I thought when we got together you were over him, he was past was the past and we were the future, but now it seems there's situation with you and Joe" he says annoyed

"Derek, there is no me and Joe, we are friends, that's it and that's all" I say 

"I gotta go, the team is waiting for me" Derek says hanging up not even saying " I love you" .

*A few weeks later* 

I was sitting at home planning Noah's first birthday while he was napping when I heard our  front door open. 

"Hey," Derek says walking into the dining room where I was sitting.

"Hi," I reply looking back to the laptop screen of party supplies.

"Where's little man?" He asks

"Napping finally, his back teeth are coming in pretty bad" I say

"Damn poor kid" he says, grabbing water from the kitchen.

After a few minutes of being silent, which was nothing new in the last couple of weeks ever since Joe brought you to the hospital to see Lyndsey.

"You working?" He asked

"No, just planning Noah's party" I smile

"Without me?" He asks

"It's not official just themes he would like, places, and guest list" I explain

"I was joking Y/n, so what're we looking at here" he says sitting beside me

"Well he's into Mickey Mouse and…"  I was cut off by Derek's phone ringing

"Hold that thought"  he says looking at his phone and leaving the room.

Later that night I just finished putting Noah to bed. I went into our bedroom, Derek was on his laptop.

''Don't forget to send you mom her ticket for the he plane ride to Florida for Easter" I remind him

"Shit, I completely forgot, there's a big case in Colorado we're we wanted for,  I leave tomorrow." He sighs

"What? Derek you just got home a few hours ago." I say

"I know baby, but it's part of the job" he says 

"Fine I'll send her the ticket information, will you at least be here for Easter ?" I ask

"Can't promise anything," he says closing his laptop.

Easter had come and gone, Derek of course was still away now on a new case, spending a few extra days in  Florida I ran into an old friend  who wanted me to design her wedding dress and bridesmaids dresses. Of course I accepted, she also told me about a small boutique her fiance's mom was selling.

" I immediately thought of you, and how incredible it would be for to to be able to sell your designs, Y/n you're so talented everyone should see it " she smiles

"Awe, thanks Trish I'll definitely think about it, this would be a dream come true for me to have my own shop" I smile

When I arrive back home Derek is already home, he takes Noah as I grab our bags bringing them into the house.

"How was the case?' I ask

"Exhausting, miss my boy" he smiles at Noah"

"Oh, yea thanks, I missed you too" I joke

"Like you didn't have a good ole time in Florida, I'm sure Joe was around" he says

"What the hell's that supposed to mean?' I ask

"Nothing forget it" he says 

" Derek, how long are you gonna keep throwing what I did with Joe up in my face, I've apologized countless times, I don't know what else to do'' I say

" Make a decision our family or Joe" he says

"You're not serious, Derek that's crazy" I laugh 

"I am serious Y/n, Noah and I or Joe" he say again

"Derek, you and Noah are my life, there's nothing between Joe and I, he's  my past like your exes are your past" I say stepping closer to him

"Good, whatta say we go out to eat, just the two of us, I'll see if moms can keep Noah" he smiles kissing my head

All I did was not, trying to register how in the hell I was gonna cut all ties to Joe.

At dinner I tell Derek about running into Trish, about her wedding and the shop.

"Congratulations sweetheart, but how are you gonna run a shop in Florida from Virginia" he asks

" That's the problem, I'll to be in Florida until I get the shop fully staffed and running properly" I say

Just as Derek is about to speak I get a awful pains in my abdomen hitching over in pain

"Y/n, are you okay?Baby Girl talk to me"  Derek says but I can't answer the pain is too unbearable. 

Next thing I know I wake up in the hospital. 

Derek and I lost our baby.

*October 2016*

Noah's birthday was emotional, and wonderful. Derek's sister Desiree, Lyndsey and I planned the most amazing sesame street birthday party. 

All of my family and Derek's family came to celebrate our favorite boy. 

I had rented a house in Tampa, so I can be close to the shop and my family. Derek flies down as often as he can. The shop is coming along great, I hired a few girls to help run the shop, and Lyndsey is  the manager.  I was setting up a manikin with a gorgeous sun dress I had recently designed when I heard a tap on the window.

I look up seeing Joe.

"Hey stranger how's it going?'' he smiles

"Hi, yeah sorry been a little distracted" I smile.

I know what you're thinking, but I couldn't do it, I couldn't cut all ties with Joe he meant to much to me, and after talking to Lyndsey she had suggested that I tell Derek what he wants to hear and pretend to cut all ties with Joe but really I would be discreet about still being friends with him.

"I see that, the shop is coming along nice, oh by the way this is for my buddy Noah, sorry I missed the party" he smiles handing me a gift bag.

"Joe you didn't have to" I say

"I wanted too" he says 

"Thank you" I smile 

"Hey," Joe says grabbing my hand." Sorry to hear about the baby, if you need anything I'm here,"

"Thank you, that means a lot," I say .

"Oh, before I go I'll have Jojo this weekend, she's been bugging me to see Noah..maybe we can set something up?' he asks

"Yeah of course, I'll call you" I say .

*March 2017* 

The shop was getting more business that I could ever imagine, I was originally supposed to give up the rental house a few months ago but with the business I had to postpone that plan, Derek helps when he can, which hasn't been very often so I left Lyndsey in charge of the shop and Noah and I headed to Virginia to see Derek. 

"Y/n, what brings  you here?" Erin Derek's boss asks as I enter the office with Noah.

"Hi, Erin, just came to surprise Derek" I smile 

"He got so big, looks just like you and Derek, and he's in his office" she smiles 

I knock on Derek's door.

"Come in" I hear him say

As I enter in, I see Derek at his desk and a blonde woman sitting in a chair in front of his desk.

"Sorry I didn't know you were busy we can wait" I say

"No Y/n, it's fine we were just finishing up paperwork on a case come in… and this Nina she's a new team member here."  He says

"Hi" I greet her

"Nina this is my wife Y/n, and our son Noah" he smiles picking up Noah

"Hi, Derek he's adorable!'' she smiles

Derek takes Noah and I for lunch 

"So how'd you like Nina?" He asks

"She's nice" I say cutting Noah's food

"Glad you like her, she's my new partner" he says

"Wait what about Kevin?'' I ask

"He's out on leave, and with no given date on his return I asked for Nina" he says

"Hold on, you asked for her?, And why was that?" I ask 

"She's a great cop, she basically ran a whole unit in Colorado" he shrugs

"Reassign her'' I say

"What? Y/n are you crazy?" He snaps

"No, I'm not crazy. I saw the way she looked at you Derek" I say

"Y/n, come on you're being ridiculous" he says

"Are you sleeping with her?" I ask

"What? Y/n this is nuts!" He says

"Answer me, there was a big case in Colorado was there?, You went to meet her, are you sleeping with her Derek" I almost yell

"Y/n, I think we need to discuss this his at home" he says .

"No, Derek I don't we do..I think I just got my answer" I say grabbing Noah and walking out of the restaurant.

[twomoonstwosuns]

cold.

back to you [series masterlist]

previous part · next part 

pairing: professor!poe dameron x reader

warnings: swearing, mentions of sex, things are getting a bit angsty

word count: 2.8k

a/n: an actual chapter without smut? i’m shocked. don’t worry, it’ll be back. in the mean time enjoy something that’s supposed to hurt a little bit. feedback is always appreciated!

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“I’m just saying, if they’re not going to salt the sidewalks, they should put all classes online. I can’t be the only one who’s tired of almost dying on my way to class. It’s a lawsuit waiting to happen.”

Kaydel always had something to complain about. Whether it was the weather or a certain person, there was always something. You had to agree with her on this, though. The semester had just started and the both of you had nearly wiped out on the slippery sidewalks. Twice.

The warmth of the building engulfed you like a warm blanket. At least they were keeping the buildings comfortable so you wouldn’t be shivering all through class. Walking into your classroom, you scanned the seats and found one of your friends sitting in the middle of the room. Only you hadn’t exactly expected to see him.

“Snap Wexley, on time to class. I never thought I’d see the day.”

You’d met Snap your freshman year. He lived on the same floor as you and your freshman roommate Karé and they started dating soon after. Between that and the close proximity of your dorm rooms, not to mention the shared secrecy of sneaking alcohol in, you became close friends.

“Well, we’re graduating in a few months, thought I’d make an effort as my parting gift.” He said as you settled into the seat next to him, removing your winter layers. “So…”

Snap was looking at you expectantly. You gave him a look back.

“My break was great, thanks for asking.” You said. “No, I didn’t forget.”

Snap smiled victoriously while Kaydel just looked confused.

“My mom made cookies for me to bring back for Snap.” You explained before turning back to Snap. “They’re at my apartment. Not only did she make you some, she made you a whole plate and I have to call her and have you tell her that you got them.”

“Tell your mom I love her.”

“Tell her yourself.”

“How does Snap know your mom?” Kaydel asked.

“Both his and Karé’sparents couldn’t come to parents weekend freshman year so my mom ‘adopted’ them for the day and they bonded. Now he’s like the son she never had. She dotes on him. And my sister’s husband Chris. My mom always wanted a son and got two girls instead.”

“So, if you don’t get married…”

“Then Snap and Karéget my place at the dinner table.”

“Your mom is definitely invited to me and Karé’s wedding.” Both your and Kaydel’s eyes widened at the insinuation and you stared at Snap with open mouths. He spoke before you could. “I haven’t proposed. Yet. I’m just saying.”

You shook your head in disbelief.

“You jackass.” You muttered, hitting his shoulder. “I can’t believe you made me think that—“

“Good afternoon, ladies and gentlemen…”

Your head snapped to the front of the room at the familiar voice. There was Poe, setting his brown leather bag next to the desk. Your pulse quickened and you stole a look from Kaydel, wondering if you had somehow misread your schedule and ended up in the wrong classroom.

“For those who haven’t had my class before, I’m Professor Dameron. I know this is supposed to be Professor D’Acy’s class, but she’s been ordered to be on bed rest until her due date in April, so I’ll be taking her class this semester.”

You gulped, anxiety creeping in. You were not prepared to see him today. How were you going to be able to sit there and concentrate when his mouth had done so many different and pleasurable things to you just two days ago?

“Y/N, you good?” Kaydel was looking at you questioningly and you realized you had been caught staring at Poe. He had removed his own coat and was looking waytoo good wearing a button down shirt with the sleeves rolled up and the top two buttons undone. You were convinced the universe was out to get you.

“Yeah…” Not even you were convinced. You dragged it out as long as you could without raising suspicion as you gathered your thoughts. “Sorry, I’m a little surprised. D’Acy’s my advisor, I was just talking to her the other day and she seemed fine. I hope everything’s ok.”

“I’m sure it’s precautionary.” Snap interjected.

“Agreed, better safe than sorry.” Kaydel said. “I’ve heard Dameron’s a great teacher though. Plus, he’s gonna be really nice to look at for the next four months.”

You nodded slowly in agreement. She and every other female would probably be ogling him, so you’d blend right in. In a weird way, it was a reassuring thought. Poe took a pile of papers from his bag and handed them to the front row, having them pass them down to every student. He then brought out the class list and started taking attendance, seeing some familiar faces from the previous semester. He already knew their preferred nicknames and made small talk with them as he marked them in attendance. It made you smile. Poe really did make an effort to have a friendly banter with his students. It was just one of the many reasons why he was one of the most popular teachers on campus.

“Kaydel Connix.”

Kaydel voiced her presence and Poe looked up to put a face to her name. That was when he took notice of you. You had busied yourself with trying to get your pen to work to avoid catching his eye, unsure of how you’d react, but you could very briefly feel his eyes rake over you. He continued down the list and you felt on edge as he neared the first letter of your last name.

“Y/N Y/L/N, I know I saw you here.”

You waved your hand and Poe caught your eye, giving you a soft smile.

“Nice to see you again,” he said as he marked your attendance. You returned the smile.

“You too, sir.”

You mentally slapped yourself for calling him ‘sir’ in a room full of people, the heat of embarrassment beginning to cover your cheeks. Then you saw his shoulders tense and curiosity got the best of you. You wondered, based on his reaction, if there was a kink you didn’t know about, and the thought of it made you bite the inside of your cheek to keep from giggling. Poe managed to hide his reaction well as he continued with attendance and you blew out a sigh of sweet relief.

“You’ve had his class before?” Kaydel whispered. You nodded as you took one of his syllabi. “So is it true, is he a really good teacher?”

He’s good at more than just teaching, you thought as you assured her. When Poe was done taking attendance, he dived into going over the syllabus. It was tedious, and he told the class as such, but necessary seeing as this wasn’t even supposed to be his class. He went through it page by page, answering questions along the way and giving details about certain assignments and days when you wouldn’t have class.

Poe dismissed the class after the hour and a half was up. You followed Kaydel and Snap out but lingered, deciding at the last minute to see if you could get a minute with him. Kaydel noticed you weren’t right behind her and gave you a questioning look.

“You go ahead,” you said loud enough for Poe to hear. “I have to ask Professor Dameron about getting ahold of one of my assignments for my portfolio. I’ll see you later.”

She nodded and left and you turned towards Poe, carefully approaching his desk.

“Question for you.”

“Answer.”

Poe watched the last student walk out the door before turning to give you his full attention. He leaned against the desk, folding his arms across his chest and exhaling quietly.

“Is this going to make things weird?” You dropped your voice to a quieter octave in case anyone came back in. “I mean, this has been working really well and I think part of that is because we didn’t see each other much in public.”

“I don’t think so. Not if we make it weird.” You were still hesitant and Poe sensed it. “Was I surprised to see you today? Yeah. Did I have to remind myself to not stare too long at you? Definitely, but I think going forward it’ll be ok because I won’t be caught off-guard seeing your gorgeous face every other day.”

You weren’t sure if he meant to call you gorgeous out loud. Pet names other than what came out in the heat of the moment was an unspoken agreement to be off-limits. Regardless, you couldn’t help the way the corners of your mouth began to turn up.

“So, you don’t want to stop?” The question was out of your mouth before you could stop it. Of course you didn’t want to stop sleeping with him, but maybe this was a sign. Since Thanksgiving break, there were more stolen glances and subtle touches anytime you “casually” ran into him in a setting that allowed a closer proximity.

“Of course not.” Poe answered without hesitation. Your shoulders relaxed with his reassurance. “Do you?”

“Not at all.”

“Then we won’t make it weird.” Poe said softly. You nodded. “I’m not gonna lie, I’m really happy I get to see you more, even if it’s just across a classroom.”

You felt your cheeks heat up. Despite your relationship being strictly physical, Poe always found little ways to make your heart beat just a little bit quicker.

“Me too.”

“You’ll just have to make sure you’re not thinking too much about what we’ve been doing.” You rolled your eyes as he chuckled. “Hey, I saw you staring earlier.”

“I know how good your mouth is.” You said. “And even if I do get caught, at least I won’t be the only female in the room thinking about you.”

Your teasing tone made him blush and an easy smile started to form on his face. While he was only crude while talking to you, Poe was actually an extremely modest person. Confident, but humble.

“Does this mean you’re taking over as my advisor as well?”

“Only if you want.” Poe said, rounding the corner of the desk to start packing things up. “D’Acy told me she’ll be reaching out to her advisees via email about the semester, but with nothing to do on bed rest I’m sure she’d be more than happy to stay on as your advisor. Her words, not mine.”

“I may take you up on that. I’ve got some pretty heavy classes this semester since it’s my last one. I guess it wouldn’t hurt to have the expertise of twogreat professors. If you don’t mind, of course.”

“I don’t mind at all.”

“Cool,” you said, giving him an appreciative smile as you fidgeted with the strap of your backpack. “I have a class soon, but I’ll let you know what D’Acy says.”

Poe nodded as you walked away. Relief flooded your body at how that conversation played out. You felt that maybe you could make it through this semester. You had almost made it to the door when he spoke again.

“Oh, and Y/N?”

Poe beckoned you back over with his finger. He looked up at you from under his lashes and you could see how dark his eyes had gotten, leaning forward onto the desk when you were back to standing in front of it.

“Call me ‘sir’ one more time and I’ll have no choice but to bend you over this desk and take you right here.”

His voice was quiet and rough; it was exactly the tone of voice he knew turned you on. Anyone who could see you now would catch on pretty quick that there was something between the two of you. You took a daring step forward, placing your hand next to his on the desk, your fingers just barely touching his but the electricity crackling between you.

“Tempting.” You glanced behind you, seeing two students walking in. Luckily, they were caught up in their own conversation so they didn’t see how close you were to Poe. You pulled your hand away and backed away from the desk. “We’ll make it happen.”

You shot him a wink and he gave you a public-approved tight-lipped smile, though his eyes shined with mischief. The ghost of a smile was still on your face when you approached the door of the building.

“Y/N.”

You stopped in your tracks, the smile disappearing from your face as another familiar voice stopped you. You looked behind you and saw the last person you expected to see; your father. Your brow furrowed in confusion and you whatever good mood you were in after leaving Poe’s class vanished instantly.

“What are you doing here?”

“You weren’t answering my calls.” He spoke softly, as if he were comforting you.

“That should’ve been a hint that I don’t want to talk to you.” You spat. “What do you want?”

“To talk.”

“There’s nothing to talk about. You left. That itself was a pretty clear message.”

“I want to explain.”

“I’m really not interested in hearing whatever bullshit excuse you’ve come up with about you and mom ‘growing apart’ or whatever. Besides, I have to go to class.”

“Then I’ll wait and we’ll get dinner. You owe me that much.”

You had started to turn away, but those five words made you whip around, anger flashing across your face. You approached him, standing face to face with your father. Your tone was laced with venom.

“I owe you? I don’t owe you anything. You broke our hearts. You left without an explanation and mom, Tallie, and I were left behind wondering why. And for what? The secretary you were banging? We blamed ourselves for weeks when we found out. So no, I don’t owe you a damn thing. In fact, the only thing owed is the respect of not making me stand here and listen to your excuse.”

“Honey, I’m sorry—“

“I don’t want to hear it.” Your voice started to shake and you willed yourself to keep it together, especially because people were staring as they passed. “I don’t want to talk to you. I don’t want to see you. Stop trying and leave me alone.”

Your father grabbed your forearm as you made to walk away for the final time.

“Let go of me.”

“Y/N, please—“

“Is everything ok?”

You didn’t even acknowledge Poe stepping up to you, so you didn’t see the concern evident on his face. You kept your eyes locked on your father, trying like hell to convey every message of resentment and sorrow you were feeling.

“Y/N?”

It was a stand-down to see who would budge first. No words were spoken. Your father’s eyes were pleading and yours were cold, emotionless with a fiery wrath burning behind them.

“Everything’s fine,” you said coldly, yanking your arm out of your father’s grip. “I have to get to class.”

You turned your back on the tow men, walking swiftly out of the building. Anger consumed you. You stopped where the sidewalk divided and, in a split second decision, went left and headed towards your apartment instead of going to class.

How dare he? You hadn’t heard much from your father since he walked out on your family and then had the audacity to come to your school and let himself explain as if you owed him that much. A million different thoughts ran through your head, all coming back to why. Why did he think he could win your forgiveness back after one dinner? It was then you realized that he never actually apologized.

Your hands were shaking so much that it took you three tries to get your key into the lock of your apartment door. You stepped inside and slammed the door shut, the sound echoing through the empty apartment. Your backpack fell to the floor and you didn’t bother to take your snow-covered coat off. You sunk down onto the living room couch, your chest constricting and your breathing become increasingly fast.

You wanted to just be angry. You wanted to yell and throw things and then be done with it, done with him. But you weren’t just angry.

You choked out a sob and dropped your head into your hands, the hurt still as raw as it was six months ago.

tag list [open!] - @ah-callie

[ateezficz]

Bittersweet Memories

*Trigger Warning*

Genre : Angst

Words: 2.1k

"Two caramel frappes please" he said softly, taking his wallet out to pay before giving the cashier a sad smile and moving towards the left to collect his drinks. 

Whilst waiting for his drinks his eyes moved to see the bouquet of sunflowers he was holding, a small smile lining his lips at the thought of you. 

"Two caramel frappes for San!" the employee called, smiling brightly at him before he noticed the black sunflower tattooed on San's left wrist, contrasting the bright ring he wore on his ring finger. 

Though most of the sunflower was black, there were tints of yellow in a few of the petals which seemed to have remained unaffected by the spreading darkness of the rest of the flower. Immediately the employees smile turned sympathetic, his eyes unable to keep eye contact as he bowed before going back to continue his work. 

San had slowly become used to all the sympathetic looks he got, and as the sunflower grew blacker by the day those looks would only increase in number, the darkness of the mark was after all the symbol of someone he'd lost. 

He collected his drinks, walking out of the café and heading towards the only place he could meet you now. Though it was very crowded, the silence allowed for San to have a conversation of sorts with you. Though it wasn't a lot, it was enough to keep him going. 

Placing his cloth on the floor he took a seat before setting down the drinks and the flowers, smiling before he spoke. 

"It's been a whole year Y/N" he said softly, looking down at his ring and tattoo again before his eyes filled with tears. 

"A whole year without you"

He never thought he'd manage for so long, a whole year, 365 days, that's a long time and you were definitely proud of him for getting so far though he still had a long way to go. 

"Today is our three year wedding anniversary" he said, smiling through his tears as he remembered all the things he'd planned to do on this same day just one year ago. 

*One Year Ago*

"Y/N~" San called out your name, entering the room with a tray full of your favorites breakfast foods which were also healthy since you weren't the only one consuming the food. 

"San you didn't have to" you laughed, smiling brightly at the tray of delicious food which was placed in front of you before you gave him a peck on the lips. 

"Happy Anniversary babe"

"Happy Anniversary Sanie" you replied, giggling at him before you started devouring your breakfast. 

"Don't you trouble your mother too much today little one, she needs a break" he spoke to the baby girl growing inside you, laughing when he saw her kick a little almost as if she were replying to him. 

"You better eat fast because I have a lot planned for today my love" he smiled at you, placing a chaste kiss on your forehead before feeding you the rest of your breakfast.

Almost an hour later you were showered and ready to go out, wearing a light pink dress which fortunately was big enough to fit around your 7 month pregnant belly. Though it wasn't the same as the one you wore on the day he proposed, it was close enough and honestly you looked stunning. 

Driving to what you assumed was the park you smiled in anticipation, not fully sure of what his plans or intentions were but you had a brief idea of what he was gonna do. There had to be a reason as to why he asked you to wear a dress similar to the one you wore almost two and a half years ago. 

The park was the same besides a few renovations like the new water fountain which had been placed in the centre, or the increase in the number of children playing all over. It truly was a wonderful sight, igniting feelings of joy and happiness within anyone who saw it, and you were no exception. 

San grabbed your hand before gently pulling you towards the centre where the fountain was, the water from the same cooling the air around it on that hot sunny day. He told you to stand there before he turned around and pulled something out of his pocket, turning back around with the most smug look on his face. 

Getting down on one knee he smiled at you, opening up the small ring holder to reveal a beautiful sunflower ring, the centre of which held a gorgeous diamond. Your eyes went wide on seeing the ring, mouth falling open when you imagined how expensive it would've been. 

"San oh my God, why did you-" "Y/N, it's our 2 year anniversary and I wasn't able to get you anything special before so please don't turn this down" he pouted, laughing out loud when you sighed out in defeat and held out your hand so he could put it on you. 

The ring sat just above the small white lily which adorned your ring finger, serving as a reminder of the angel of a soulmate you had in front of you. 

"Thank you" you said gratefully, pulling him in for a kiss which both of you smiled into. 

"Can we get caramel frappes please~" you asked, giving him the most innocent smile you could and of course he couldn't say no to that so you ended up grabbing two of those from the café right next to the park. 

That café was, in fact, where you'd met him almost a little more than three years ago.

You remember being in a bad state of mind when you walked into the cafe only to see this extremely bright and jolly employee and when it was your turn to order you could feel the happiness he was radiating affecting you. 

You were going to order a black coffee but after some convincing you ended up ordering the caramel frappe, which is why that particular drink was significant for both you and San, it's the drink you met over after all. 

You couldn't be happier, you had San as your husband and a beautiful baby girl on the way, life just couldn't have been better and for that sole reason it decided to become worse for both of you. 

San held your hand as you walked beside him towards a flower shop which was across the street, but your excitement got the better of you when you saw the bouquet of lilies and roses sitting outside the shop. You let  go of his hand and walked ahead onto the crossing, making sure to look left and right even though the light for pedestrians was green.

"Y/N be careful" San called out from behind you, causing you to stop and look back at him, motioning for him to catch up and just as he was about to jog over to you he saw it, the car which was racing towards you.

You were clueless, not expecting the people to break the rules and before you even knew it the impact of the car colliding with your legs sent you flying across the road, your fragile form landing on the hard concrete like a rag doll falling on the floor. 

San was overcome with shock and disbelief, he was convinced this was a nightmare and he would wake up any second now, but he didn't. Nothing changed. 

The car still drove off without bothering to help, the people still crowded around your lifeless form pondering over if they should call the ambulance or not, every fragment of life within you still ebbed away like a receding tide. 

He still stood there waiting, but it wasn't in his control. He didn't even have time to comprehend what happened when the ambulance arrived and took you away, leaving San standing all alone, a look of pure horror and incredulity painted over his face. 

His knees threatened to give out but he had to make sure you were alright. Finally coming back to reality he realized the ambulance was already on its way back. He wanted to chase it but it wouldn't get him anywhere so instead he sprinted towards his car and drove to the hospital you were being taken to. 

Your anniversary fell on a weekend that year, which meant that the traffic on the roads was unbelievable and San could feel his heart beating faster and faster the longer he took to reach you. Glancing over at the bright yellow sunflower which adorned his left wrist he let slip a few tears when he realized it was slowly turning black. One petal was already gone, meaning it wouldn't be long before you would be too. 

"Goddammit why today!" he screamed, slapping the steering wheel before the light finally turned green and he was able to make it to the hospital. His heart was about ready to jump out of his chest as he frantically ran up to the receptionist, asking where you had been taken. 

"Mrs. Choi Y/N is in the emergency room" she said, pointing to the large white door at the end of the hallway. 

As soon as his eyes landed on it he ran towards it faster than the speed of light but much to his dismay the door was locked and he was unable to get through. He could, however, see you laying on the bed with almost every inch of you drenched in blood. 

"Y-Y/N" he whispered, his tears running free as he collapsed to the floor, his knees finally giving out underneath him. 

To him it felt like he had sat there for hours on end, just staring at the representation of his soulmate, the sunflower on his wrist, lose its colour little by little, but really it had only been minutes when the doctor opened the door and came out. 

"D-Doctor how is she? Is she OK? Is my child OK?" he asked agitatedly,  his agitation worsening when the doctor gave him a sad smile and shook his head. 

"I'm sorry, we tried our best to at least save the baby but it was too late. They…..could not make it"

The only words he did not want to hear left the doctors mouth and that was it. It was like his life had been stripped away from him in one second. All of his happiness, just gone. 

'They could not make it' these words had circulated in his mind for months after, becoming the cause of the nightmares he had almost daily where he had to relive all of it all over again. 

He would've given anything, absolutely anything to have changed the events of that day. Maybe if he hadn't let go of your hand you would've been alright, or maybe if he hadn't brought you out of the house in the first place you'd have been fine, but there was no point in regretting anything, what was done was done. 

How quickly his house, his home, which would've had three people living in it, had become so empty and quiet. How quickly he had lost the love of his life, the mother of his child, his soulmate. 

Coming back home that particular night had been worse than dying. Looking at all the things which you had bought for your baby girl, all the clothes you owned yourself which you'd been waiting to wear after the delivery, it all just poured salt in his wound. 

His babygirl, he wasn't even able to see her, not even once. The faint pink rose which had begun appearing on his shoulder began darkening, just like the sunflower on his hand. 

You  were both gone in an instant, and there was nothing he could've done to stop it. 

*Present Day*

"I-I never thought a day could be so happy yet sad at the same time." he said, sobbing slightly as his eyes landed on the date written on the tombstone, the numbers matching the date of this day. 

'5th November 2019'

This day had now become the day he gained you as well as the day he lost you, and nothing was more painful than the realization that the only memories he had of you were over the span of no more than three years. 

"I miss you, I need you Y/N" he sobbed out, his tears now beginning to soak the cloth beneath him, a few drops bouncing off the faint yellow sunflower on his wrist. 

"H-Happy An-niversary Y/N" 

[everlarkbirthdaygifts]

Happy Birthday, neonsnail!

Today, we wish @neonsnail​ a very Happy Birthday! We hope you’re having as wonderful a day as you’re able to right now! To make your day even more special, the lovely @endlessnightlock​ has written a story just for you!

“Peeta, would you stop pacing?” Katniss was concerned about her boyfriend’s jittery movements around his living room. She stilled him by wrapping her arms around his shoulders. “My mom and dad are going to love you.”

Peeta rested his hands on hers, and she laid her cheek against the soft cotton of his shirt.

They stood that way for a moment in comfortable silence. She felt him take several deep breaths, and for a moment thought maybe she’d finally gotten through to him. But then he took her hands in his and brushed his lips across her knuckles.

“That’s sweet of you to say, but you’re not a very convincing liar,” he told her.

“You are impossible,” she said, moving to face him. She grasped the collar of his button-down shirt and pretended to straighten it, when in reality it the way it laid was perfectly fine- Katniss just wanted him to relax. “Why are you so sure they’re not going to like you.”

Tonight her mom and dad were meeting Peeta, her boyfriend of three months, for the first time. She was excited about the meeting because she knew they would like him. There wasn’t anything not to like about Peeta.

But he was nervous. Very nervous.

She’d never witnessed her seemingly confident, self-assured, articulate boyfriend behave this way. Multiple times over the last week she’d caught him muttering to himself, very un-Peeta-like things about needing to “update his wardrobe” or “brush up his resume.”

Katniss dropped the collar of his shirt and stood on her tiptoes to get closer, her hands moving to his shoulders. She smiled up at him. “There, I fixed it. You look very handsome. Perfect.”

His expression relaxed a shade, his mouth turning up in one corner. “You know you’re the perfect one,” he said,” to me, at least.”

It reminded her of the way he’d looked the first time they met. Peeta had been a surprise; she hadn’t been looking for a relationship, heck she didn’t usually even like blonds. He was a new mechanic at the garage she’d been taking her car to have serviced for the last decade. Katniss had almost fallen over on herself when he smiled at her from behind the service counter. She’d never seen a warmer expression on such a cute guy.

The attraction to Peeta had been instant, but Katniss had brushed it off, knowing the likelihood of seeing him again was slim. Also, she didn’t feel like she could just ask him for his number. Women probably did that with him all the time.

But then a funny thing happened.

Katniss began running into Peeta all over the place.

She saw him at the grocery store, and his smile there was just the same as before- shy but friendly.

“Hi,” Katniss had said before quickly looked away with a misguided sense of self-preservation. But in that glance she’d allowed herself, she’d had noticed Peeta wasn’t wearing a wedding ring.

And then a few days later they bumped into each other at the coffee shop down the street from the garage- which probably wasn’t that crazy, come to think of it. Katniss may have visited that particular establishment on purpose.

A girl had to get coffee somewhere, right?

That day she found out that he liked either bittersweet hot chocolate or plain tea, while she was a heavy-on-the-dairy-and-sugar-in-my-coffee-drink kind of girl.

And then Katniss ran into Peeta at the grocery store again just a few days after the meeting at the coffee shop. That time they talked a bit longer. He’d had artichokes in his shopping cart, and she asked him “what exactly is it the people do with artichokes?”

Peeta told her that he was making spinach-artichoke dip because his brothers and some of their friends were coming by to watch football that weekend. “I love it, but I live by myself so I don’t usually have a reason to make it,” he added. “It’s a lot of dip for one person.”

“Oh, I live alone, too,” Katniss admitted. “I never cook for myself. It’s mostly take-out or a bowl of cereal around chez Everdeen.”

He’d laughed, his eyes crinkling in the corners and his nose scrunching up adorably. They’d both lingered a bit, which had eventually progressed to Peeta asking for her phone number after hemming and hawing for a few more minutes.

There were lots of dates out and dinners in, and here they were three months later still together and growing closer every day. Katniss was happier in this relationship than she’d ever thought it possible to be. She was pretty sure that Peeta was the one.

But there was one hurdle to overcome.

Well, there might be more than just the one in the grand scheme of things, but this particular hurdle seemed like a biggie.

Peeta was terrified of meeting Katniss’s mother and father because they were wealthy.

Very wealthy.

Lily and James Everdeen had begun a company that manufactured organic skin and hair products while Katniss was in her late teens. It’d been a lifelong dream of her mothers, and sometime shortly after she’d moved out of the house the business exploded almost overnight.

Her mother and father had moved out of their three-bedroom ranch home in the suburbs, where they’d raised her and Prim, and into a newly-built ten-bedroom twelve-bath home on a hundred acres of gorgeous land full of gently sweeping hills and lush woodlands just outside of Panem.

“They’re no different, they just have-“

“A lot of money? Successful careers?” Peeta stared down at his hands, which no matter how much he scrubbed and scrubbed, always maintained those stubborn oil stains around the crevices and underneath his fingernails.

Katniss sighed. She hated to see him like this. He was good at his job. He enjoyed his job and made an honest living at it. Wasn’t that enough? “Money isn’t everything.”

“I know that. It’s just … I just don’t want you to be embarrassed because of me, that’s all.”

Katniss had realized that vulnerability he was so open to sharing was one of the things she liked most about him.

Not just liked, loved. He was so different from her, so open and unafraid to let others know how he felt. He was so easy to care about.

Katniss swallowed against the nerves that all seemed to be accumulating in her throat. She wasn’t sure if this was the ideal time to tell him how much he meant to her- but was there really ever a perfect time? No one had ever accused her of being a planner.

“They’re going to like you, just the way you are,” she said, her voice soft and a little shaky with nerves.

She was nervous, but not for the same reason he was. What she was about to say was another first for their relationship and a much bigger first than meeting each other’s family. “I promise they’ll love you.”

Katniss pushed her fears aside and said it then. Because it was true. Because she wanted him to know. “They’re going to love you because I do.”

The whole look of his face changed at her words. She didn’t want to leave any room for doubt so she steeled herself, rushing the rest of the words out before she lost her nerve. “The thing is… I love you, Peeta. I’m in love with you, actually,” she clarified, “and you make me so happy.”

The smile that lit up his face was priceless.

Worth a million bucks, easily.